#been working on the same fic for years now

[pulisicsgirl]

in my hour of need - mason mount

summary: eight months after the end of their relationship, Y/N and Mason find themselves at the same event—a charity gala—and the night’s events leave them both unsure of where they stand with each other

pairing: Mason Mount x reader

word count: 8.4k

warnings/tags: inappropriate joke is made about the reader, angst, self-doubt, exes-to-lovers, hurt/comfort (hee hee hee), ends with fluff of course don’t worry, lots of crying involved along the way

requested: no

based off of this concept from @mountttmase and @saltyheartnightmare

A/N: I’m so excited to finally have a fic ready to post for y’all again!!! I’ve literally been working on this one for the last three months, so it’s definitely a relief to put it out there! This is set during the TFSL gala that Mason attended back at the beginning of March, so some things might be a bit”outdated” by now… I hope yall enjoy!!!

Seeing Mason tonight had been more difficult than you had anticipated.

Eight months had passed since the fairly amicable breakup between the two of you. Things had ended on fairly good terms, but it had been the little things that built up that had led to the end of your relationship. Between Mason’s injury along with the situation at United and new, huge career opportunities that had arisen for you in the last year, the two of you seemed to be in completely different places in your lives. It seemed like you barely saw each other for a few minutes after you woke up in the morning and a few minutes before you fell asleep at night.

In the end, the disconnect was too much, and the two of you agreed to end things before they could get ugly.

You were thankful to have avoided the period of fighting and bickering that you knew would inevitably come with the track that you and Mason were on. Your relationship with him had many fond memories attached to it, and you didn’t want to see those tainted by a messy breakup. But every day that passed, you missed waking up in his bed, being by his side, spending time with him— all of it.

The two of you had tried your best to remain friends, truly. You had texted back and forth a bit, doing your best to keep up with each other’s lives and keep each other updated. You met for coffee about three weeks after the split, but after that your communication had quickly fallen off. You wondered if, like you, Mason had realized that trying to maintain a friendship had grown too painful. If, like you, it was killing him to have you sitting across from him and not be able to hold you, to kiss you, to call you his.

But there was no way for you to know— the two of you hadn’t spoken since.

It hadn’t come as a surprise that he was making an appearance at the charity gala. After all, it was him that had connected you with Together For Short Lives, the organization that Mason had a long-standing relationship with and also the organization benefitting from tonight’s events. Mason’s passion for the charity and its work had sparked something within you, and you had quickly pulled some strings to get your workplace involved with it as well— all of this while you were still together.

So when your boss told you about his contribution to the charity gala and has asked you to be the representative for the business at the auction itself, you knew that seeing Mason would be inevitable.

But it’s been eight months since the split—seven since you last saw him. Surely, you’d be fine by now, you had thought.

Unfortunately, you had thought wrong.

The first glimpse of him in the sleek black suit had sent a sharp pang through your chest, a wave of emotions crashing over you. His hair and beard were neatly trimmed and the softness of it immediately made you think of how it felt when you would run your fingers through it, or the scratch of his beard when you would cradle his jaw in your palm. His shoulders seemed to have grown broader, if that was even possible. His eyes looked brighter, and he seemed far more well-rested than you had seen him in the months leading up to your breakup.

And then the terrifying thought had hit you.

Maybe he was better off without you.

Maybe the breakup had been good for him. Maybe you had been the thing draining him in the last months of your relationship.

You felt the tears spring to your eyes as soon as the thought crossed your mind, blinking them away quickly.

But the thought continued to plague you as the night went on. There were a thousand things that were making you feel unsure of yourself and the thought that your relationship with Mason had actually been detrimental to him was just the cherry on top.

This just wasn’t the kind of event you usually found yourself at, even less a setting that you felt comfortable in. You would much prefer a quite night in or the opportunity to fade into the background. When you had been with Mason, you found yourself at a few events like this one, but you always had him at your side. Often you would allow him to navigate the evening for you, so you didn’t even have to think about anything. Tonight, instead of standing next to you so you cold hold tightly onto his arm when you felt unsteady, he was 100 feet away, engaged in conversation with someone else.

To make matters worse, you had asked a friend of yours to help you find and choose a dress for the evening, and she had insisted you would look and feel great in this elegant, low-cut, dark green dress that had an open back. At the time, she had convinced you that the piece complimented your figure and would make you feel confident and sexy. However, it was completely out of your comfort zone, and you regretted your decision to listen to her as you tugged on parts of the dress to try to cover yourself up more throughout the night.

Between the unfamiliar environment, the dress, and Mason’s presence, everything left you feeling quite unsure of yourself.

When you reached your seating assignment, you were relieved to see that you were familiar with a few of the individuals that were sitting at your table—acquaintances that worked for the same company as you who, no doubt, were also sent as representatives for the charity gala. The relief was short-lived, however, when you realized that, directly in front of you, a mere two tables over, Mason’s seat was directly in your line of sight.

You did your best to sink into the shadows, allowing conversation to flow around you without making any contribution, unless someone directly asked you a question. You also tried your hardest not to look over at Mason— this sight of him happily engaging in conversation, seemingly unaffected by your presence, was too much for your heart to handle.

A wave of relief washed over you when someone got up on the stage, removing any pressure to engage in conversation at the table as everyone turned their attention to the announcer. He spoke a bit about Together for Short Lives and the work that they did, soon announcing that it was time for the items to be auctioned off.

Some of the auction items piqued your interest, seeming like items or experiences that you thought you might enjoy. But any sort of intrigue faded when you heard the amounts of money that some of the gala’s patrons were volunteering for them, quickly realizing you were way out of your depth in this room of people.

Before too long, the announcer introduced a “Manchester United Experience,” involving a tour of the team’s facility, accompanied by the team’s star boy himself. Mason approached the stage, walking up the short flight of stairs as applause rang throughout the room. You didn’t hear much of the discussion of the experience as you got caught up in watching Mason and the playful way he interacted with the announcer and the crowd. His silly boyishness sent a pang through your heart, missing the playful way he used to interact with you.

You could’ve sworn his eyes caught yours as they swept the room, and you flashed him a short, forced smile as a sort of sign of goodwill. You weren’t exactly sure where the two of you stood, but you wanted to show him that you didn’t harbor any negative feelings toward him, despite the loss of contact.

The faintest of smiles tugged at the corner of his lips before he turned his attention back to the announcer who had just asked him a question— one that Mason had to ask him to repeat.

Soon Mason was leaving the stage, having earned an ungodly amount of money for TFSL with his promised tour of Old Trafford.

A sick feeling settled in your gut, knowing it couldn’t be much longer before your company’s contribution was auctioned off. The mere thought of stepping onto that stage sent a rush of fear through your veins.

Before you knew it, you found yourself standing to the side of the stage, awaiting your queue to join the announcer on it. Your palms felt sweaty, your heart racing as you tried your best to compose yourself. Applause rang through the room, and you put all of your focus into not tripping as you walked up the stairs.

The room felt ten times bigger from atop the stage, filled with many more people than you had realized were in attendance. You tried to focus on smiling and nodding at the appropriate moments as the announcer explained what your company was auctioning off.

“And of course, we’re very appreciative of Miss… uhm…”

“Y/L/N,” you spoke quietly as the announcer trailed off.

“Yes, we’re very appreciative of Miss Y/L/N being here with us tonight,” the announcer resumed his charismatic personality after it had faltered briefly. “She’s certainly doing her part to raise money for a good cause. I mean, with this much skin on show, that has to be worth a few extra pounds on your bid, right?”

Your stomach sank to your feet as laughter erupted in the large room. You felt the heat in your cheeks, your smile faltering at his words. You suddenly felt ten times more self-conscious of yourself as you stood on the stage, feeling like a zoo animal being laid bare and displayed for everyone’s entertainment.

“With that, we’re going to start the bidding off at…” The announcers voice faded as the room felt like it was closing in on you. Your eyes flicked through the crowd, jumping from face to face until you found the one you were looking for— Mason.

While everyone else seemed to still be composing themselves from the eruption of laughter at the joke the announcer had made at your expense, Mason’s eyes met yours with the saddest expression you though you had ever seen. You could just barely make out his lips mouthing the words it’s okay, you’re okay, before your misty eyes could no longer make out his face.

You composed yourself just long enough for the announcer to finish off the auction, and you offered him a forced smile before you rushed off of the stage.

All you knew was that you needed to be anywhere but this room. You needed to get out, away from all of the people who had just witnessed your very public humiliation.

You made a beeline toward the back of the large hall that everyone was seated in, spotting the double doors that you knew led out to the hallway. Your heels click on the floor as you push through the doors and find the exit out to the decorative garden off of the side of the building being used for the gala. Thinking a bit of fresh air would do you good, you rushed outside, ignoring the chill that rushed through you as the cold air met your skin. Moving quickly away from the building, you ducked behind some hedges in the hope that no one would see you.

Your breathing was heavy as you tried your best to dampen the emotions welling up inside of you. Your throat felt tight as you fought back the tears of embarrassment, frustration, and regret. Forcing yourself to breath slowly, in through your nose and out through your mouth, you did your best to wipe gently at the corners of your eyes, praying that you wouldn’t ruin the makeup you had done only a few hours before.

“Y/N?” you heard a voice call from around the corner. Your heart sank as you recognized the gentle tone and the footsteps let you know that he was close. This was surely not the circumstances you had hoped to be in when you spoke to him for the first time in months.

You turned your back just in time for Mason to round the corner and find you hiding away in your little nook. There was nothing you hated more than the idea of letting him see you cry in this moment.

“Y/N, love-“

“I’m fine, Mason.” Your voice came out harsher than you had meant for it to. “Really, I’m okay. Just go back to the auction.”

Undeterred by the way you had spoken, Mason took a couple of steps closer to you. “No, you’re not, Y/N. I know you better than that.”

You couldn’t respond, and you knew he hadn’t missed the small sniffle you had let out as you bit your lip to keep it from trembling.

It was only a moment before you felt his fingers gently take hold of your arm, turning you to face him. Your head was bowed low, still unwilling to let him see your misty eyes.

“C’mere, love,” he whispered, wrapping his arms around your torso as he pulled you in for a tight hug. You couldn’t keep yourself from returning the gesture, your arms wrapped under his as you pressed your palms into his broad back to hold him close. You tucked your face into his neck and suddenly, your heart felt more settled than it had in months.

“He had no right to say anything like that— about you or about anyone,” Mason mumbled into your hair, pressing a barely-there kiss to your temple. “It was completely inappropriate, and you have every right to feel upset. I’m so sorry.”

He brought a hand up to cradle the back of your head, holding you closer to him. You didn’t fight it at all, settling into him more and taking comfort in the proximity.

When he could tell that your breathing had steadied, Mason pulled back, still holding you with one arm as he looked down at you with a soft smile.

“There she is.” He brought his free hand up, brushing his thumb gently under your eyes to wipe away a tear that had fallen. The gesture was so gentle and intimate that you felt like your knees were about to give out, thankful that he still had one arm around you to steady you. “Whatever waterproof makeup you’re using is working because you still look perfect,” he joked, warmth flooding through him at the soft giggle you let out before dropping your forehead onto his chest.

“For the record, your dress is beautiful,” Mason said softly. You knew he must have sensed your discomfort with how much skin you had on show, even before the gala announcer had made any comment about it. “And, in the least creepy, predatory way possible, you look amazing tonight.”

“Thank you,” you whispered, wanting to convey your gratitude to him while trying to ignore the flutter in your stomach at his words. The one thing you did like about the mostly open back of the dress is that you could feel Mason’s palm flattened directly against your skin as he held you close, his thumb rubbing back and forth in soothing motions. This, combined with the look in his eye that you couldn’t quite place as he looked down at you, made your skin feel like it was on fire, the heat rising up your neck and into your cheeks.

You brought your hands to his chest, holding the lapels of his jacket in your hand before you spoke quietly. “We should go back inside before anyone realizes we’ve gone.” You felt suddenly overwhelmed by the interaction with him, feeling yourself falling back into old habits without even intending to.

Mason unwound his hands from your waist, seeming a bit discouraged by your comment as he merely nodded, holding his arm out for you to take. You did so, holding onto his elbow to keep yourself steady as he led you back inside.

It was quiet between the two of you, neither sure what to say to the other after the intimate moment in the garden. Once back inside you squeezed his elbow gently, saying, “I’m gonna go freshen up really quickly, but I’ll see you back out there,” with a gentle smile. Mason nodded, letting you step away from him and into the bathroom.

In truth, while you did feel a need to freshen up a bit after the tears you had shed outside, you needed a moment to collect yourself— not because of the auction announcer’s comments, but because of Mason.

You stood at the small sink in the ladies’ room, watching yourself in the mirror as you tried to stop the way your head seemed to be spinning. The last time you had seen Mason was seven months ago, engaged in stiff conversation because neither of you knew how to speak to each other after the breakup. But now, he had come to your rescue without a second thought and held you as if the breakup had never even happened.

And it felt right…

You shook your head, telling yourself not to read too much into it— Mason is a caring person and just because he ran to your side when someone had said something hurtful about you doesn’t mean he wants you back. You were self-aware enough to recognize that you had a tendency to let your thoughts run away with you, and you did your best to shut it down before it got out of hand.

At the same time, Mason’s mind was also running wild. His brain felt as if it was under some sort of fog, intoxicated by the feeling of being able to touch your skin again. He was like an addict who had quit, cold turkey, some months ago, and the first taste of your proximity had nearly done him in. He couldn’t stop thinking of how it felt to be so close to you again— to feel your weight against his body, to smell your shampoo that was still the same, to hear your soft voice, muffled by his own neck, your gentle breaths fanning over his skin.

He was worried that maybe he had been too forward— maybe you hadn’t wanted him to run after you. He didn’t want you to think he felt like he needed to rescue you from every poor situation, but after hearing the announcer’s comments and seeing the way it had so clearly upset you (even though everyone else seemed to have overlooked it), he knew he couldn’t just let you be on your own.

He been wary of overwhelming you, but it felt right to pull you into his arms out in the garden. It felt right to hold you close to him and rub gentle, soothing circles into your back with his thumb, the way he’d always done before.

Mason felt unsure of himself. He worried that your hurry to get back inside was to get away from him. He pondered with the idea of going back into the gala so it didn’t seem like he was hovering. But he battled with himself internally, thinking that you may not have wanted to be left to your own devices.

He hated that the months he had spent apart from you had robbed him of his ability to read you. He just wished he could figure out what was going on in your head.

In the bathroom, if you hadn’t had a full face of makeup on, you would’ve taken this opportunity to splash your face with cold water. However, a few deep breaths while you told yourself to get it together would have to do, and you exited the bathroom, planning to find your way back to your table and leave as soon as the event was over. It would be best, you thought, to not engage too much with Mason to avoid getting your hopes up before they were inevitably crushed.

Those plans were cut short the moment you stepped out of the bathroom and into the building’s foyer. There, Mason was waiting for you, and your stomach did a flip at the soft smile that took over his face when he lifted his head and saw you.

A wave of relief that you hadn’t expected washed over you at the sight of him waiting there.

“It sounds like they’ve wrapped up the auction in there.” Mason jabbed a thumb over his shoulder, gesturing toward the large hall that you had fled from just a bit ago. You could hear the sound of loud conversation and laughter, signaling that Mason was, indeed correct, and the guests would be starting to exit the hall soon.

Unsure of what you were meant to say, you were thankful when Mason spoke up again. “Look, I’m here, and you’re welcome to stick with me if you’re still feeling a bit overwhelmed, but if you want me to just leave you be, I understa-”

“No, please,” you rushed to cut him off, the thought of having the face the room full of people before you alone sending a feeling of dread down your spine. “I mean… I just… can I just walk with you?” Your voice was small when you spoke again, feeling pathetic for being incapable of facing an event without him by your side.

A warm feeling spread across Mason’s chest at your words, feeling a sense of pride that his presence made you feel even a little bit safer in the unfamiliar environment. Wordlessly, he offered his arm to you again, a reassuring smile on his lips.

As much as you wanted to portray yourself as an independent person who was able to take care of yourself, you had to admit that the rest of the evening felt much easier with Mason at your side. It was so easy to slip back into the same old routine—everyone wanted to talk to the star footballer, and you were happy to stand quietly at his side while he shook hands and unleashed his irresistible charm on each one.

Mason kept you close to him at all times, and the warmth of him settled your nerves tremendously. The gentle placement of his hand on your lower back sent tingles up your spine every time, and it took everything in you not to wrap your arms around his waist, afraid of overstepping.

It wasn’t much longer before Mason was leaning down, mumbling in your ear to ask if you were ready to leave. He knew this wasn’t your scene at all and had been looking for an opportunity to get you out of there since the two of you had stepped back into the gathering hall.

You had to hold back a shiver as his breath fanned over your neck, nodding in response. You let him know you just had to pop over to your table to grab your things and he nodded, following as you led the way.

Once you had retrieved your clutch and bid as quick of a goodbye as you could muster to those that were still lingering at your table, you and Mason turned to leave, heading back toward the set of doors you had entered through. The hall had grown more crowded, and as you weaved between tables, you allowed Mason to grasp your hand, leading the way through the sea of people so you wouldn’t be separated.

As you entered the foyer, Mason tugged you forward gently so that you returned to his side. The two of you exchanged a short smile.

“Is your hotel close by?” you asked, trying to make a bit of small talk as the two of you walked toward the exit.

When the bridge of Mason’s nose went red, a shy but unsure smile on his face, you slapped a hand over your face, realizing the double meaning of your question.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that,” you felt the heat in your face as you, no doubt, were turning bright red. “I was just trying to make small talk. Clearly, I’m not good at it.”

“No, no, it’s okay.” Mason couldn’t hold back his laughter. “Uh, I’m actually making the drive back to Manchester tonight. We’ve got training tomorrow morning, so I’ve got to get home.” Mason reached the door, holding it open for you. “What about you? Are you nearby?”

“Yeah, actually.” The two of you reached the sidewalk in front of the building, coming to a stop as you turned toward each other. “I’m supposed to be a hotel just a bit that way.” You pointed behind him, toward the accommodations that your job was paying for.

There was a beat of silence between the two of you.

“You know… you’re welcome to tag along back to Manchester with me, if you wanted to. I could use the company to keep me awake.” Mason smiled softly at you, remembering how much you hated staying in hotels.

“Don’t you have Lewis or someone with you? I wouldn’t want to impose.”

Mason shook his head in response, mumbling a quiet, “just me.” He was subtly rocking back and forth on his feet, and you could tell he was nervous about your answer.

Getting to go home, rather than sleeping in an uncomfortable hotel bed did sound pretty nice after the turn your night had taken.

Mason watched your eyebrows furrow in thought, an anxious feeing settling in his tummy as he awaited your response.

“You’re sure?”

Mason did his best to conceal the excitement he felt at the idea of getting to spend a couple more hours with you. “Yeah, I’m sure,” he whispered. “Come on, you and I both know you won’t get any sleep in that hotel bed.”

You couldn’t deny that he was right.

It wasn’t long before you were ducking into the passenger seat of Mason’s car, making sure the bottom of your dress was all the way in before Mason closed the door behind you.

The drive started out quiet, neither of you sure how to navigate the situation that you found yourself in. But as soon as you asked Mason about the FA Cup quarterfinal win over Liverpool where he had made his return following injury, his face lit up and things felt like they were almost back to normal.

You did your best to keep the topic of conversation on Mason and his life, not wanting to speak about yourself. Any time he seemed to be coming to the end of one topic, you were sure to ask another question before he had the chance to ask one to you.

Because, truth be told, life had been nothing but dull since the two of you had parted ways. Seeing him tonight was the most interesting thing to happen to you since… well, since the last time you’d seen him.

It was no secret that the transition to Manchester had been difficult for the both of you. There was no doubt it had contributed to the ending of your relationship. Leaving behind your friends, your old flat, and all of the things you had known had been no easy task. Thankfully, you had been able to stay in the same line of work, merely transferring to a new location. But you had struggled to adjust to the new, unfamiliar city, even more so when you didn’t have Mason at your side. Weekend visits back to London to visit your old friends were all that had kept you going in the last months.

As you listened to Mason telling stories of all of the fun things he had gotten up to with the boys on the team that he had grown closer with, the self-doubt creeped back in. He seemed to be doing so much better since the two of you called things off, and again your mind told you that maybe he was better off without you.

Mason noticed the change in your demeanor almost immediately. The car grew quiet, and you sat with your head leaned against the window, watching the lights as they passed. It may have been months since he last saw you, but he could recognize the signs of you overthinking from a mile away, unsure of whether it was about the announcer’s comments from earlier in the night or the fact that you were sitting in a car with him.

Wanting to provide a bit of reassurance, Mason reached over, taking your hand in his, bringing it up to his face, and pressing a quick kiss to the back of it. He placed your hand back in your lap, moving to put his back on the steering wheel, but your grip tightened slightly to prevent him from doing so. Your head remained pressed against the glass, but the small gesture brought a smile to Mason’s face as he shifted to intertwine his fingers with yours.

Mason didn’t press you for conversation, allowing you the space to process the events of the night however you needed to. Before long, Mason heard the soft sound of your deep, steady breathing, and a quick glance in your direction revealed that you had drifted off to sleep, your hand relaxed in his. The dull ache that had settled in his chest all night grew a bit sharper as he stole a few glances in your direction, admiring the peaceful expression on your face.

As much as he tried to hide it, as much as he tried to put on a brave face and talk about all of the amazing things that had been going on in his like recently, he couldn’t deny…

He missed you.

He missed having you like this, at his side at the end of a long day. He missed the feeling of ease that washed over him just by knowing you were close by and being able to have that same effect on you. He missed catching up with you at the end of the day, instead of trying to accurately recap the seven months that had passed since he’d last seen you.

He just missed you being in his life and had spent the last eight months trying to find out how to get you back in it.

*

You were jostled awake as you heard the sound of a car door closing. You sat up straight, blinking your eyes a few times as you tried your best to figure out where you were. You recognized the interior of Mason’s car, a flash of confusion running through you before the memories of the night came flooding back in.

The car door at your side opened, Mason appearing at your side as he crouched down, offering you the gentlest of smiles.

“Hey there, love,” he spoke softly, and the kind look in his eyes made your heart flutter. “You fell asleep on the way back, and I realized I don’t know where your new flat is.”

The little flutter of your heart quickly died, the reality of your failed relationship crashing back in after you had been able to put it to the back of your mind for much of the night since Mason had come to your aid.

“O-Oh, I’m sorry,” you shook your head, reaching for your bag to pull out your phone. “I’ll just order a car, I’m so sor-”

“Don’t be silly, just stay here. I’ve got some extra things you can use, and I’m going into training late tomorrow anyway, so I can drop you at home on my way,” Mason smiled at you, and the way his eyes shone hopefully meant you wouldn’t need much convincing, whispering a soft “okay” in reply.

Mason took your hand, helping you out of the car and leading you inside as you wiped your bleary eyes. He led you to his room, releasing your hand as he wandered through the room, laying out a t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants for you to wear. He wandered to the bathroom for a few moments. When he emerged, you watched with confusion as he collected a few things in his hands and walked toward his door.

“You can sleep in here tonight. I still had some of your skincare products left over from before, so they’re out on the counter,” he smiled at you. “I’ll just be in the guest room, if you need anything.”

His generosity caught you off-guard, and before you could come up with a response, he placed a quick kiss to the top of your head and left the room, closing the door softly behind him.

You stood in the middle of the room for a moment, just looking around, taking it all in. You never would have suspected that you’d find yourself here again, and you couldn’t wrap your head around the turn that this night had taken.

Finally snapping yourself out of it, you slipped out of your dress, pulling Mason’s shirt over your head. The scent of his cologne mixed with the laundry detergent he always used brought a wave of emotion crashing over you, and your lower lip wobbled as you walked into the bathroom.

Along with a spare toothbrush that he had set out for you, all of your skincare products were lined up on the counter, and the thought that he had held onto them for you after all this time was what finally caused the tears the spill down your cheeks, the emotions of the night finally catching up with you.

When you crawled into the bed, face washed and feeling fresher after the long night, you allow the tears to flow, pressing your face into Mason’s pillow.

All of it was so overwhelming. Seeing him again after so long. How unsure you had felt of yourself throughout the night. Being humiliated in front of an entire audience. The way Mason had run to your side without a moment’s hesitation. The way it had felt so natural to fall back into conversation with him, to touch him, for him to touch you. Being back in the house that you had once shared with him.

It was all too much.

Not even 30 feet away, Mason was lying on his back in the guest bed, eyes wide open as he stared at the ceiling. There was no way he was falling asleep any time soon, the thought of you in his bed only a few steps away enough to keep him awake.

After an hour had passed, accompanied by only his racing thoughts, Mason toyed with the idea of sneaking down to his room to see if you were awake. There were a thousand things he wanted to say to you, and he felt like he was going to explode if he didn’t get to say them soon.

But he thought better of it, guessing that you were probably already asleep, and he didn’t want to disturb you.

However, Mason had guessed wrong. Instead, you were lying on your side, legs tucked up close to your body, staring at the small, framed photo of the two of you on Mason’s side table. It had always been there during your relationship, and the thought that he had kept it in the time since you had split brought such a weight of sadness over you that you felt sick.

Did he miss you the way you missed him? Did he, too, regret not fighting harder for your relationship with every day that passed?

The thought kept you awake until the early hours of the morning.

When Mason awoke the next morning, a heavy exhaustion weighed on him as he had only slept a few hours, tossing and turning the entire time. He crawled out of bed and slipped a shirt over his head, his feet padding softly on the carpeted floor as he moved down the hallway to check on you. He noticed that the door to his room was already open, and when he peeked his head in, you were nowhere to be found.

From the way the blankets were shifted, Mason could tell that you had slept on his side of the bed, and his chest tightened at the thought.

The sound of clinking pots and pans coming from the kitchen caused Mason’s ears to perk up and led him in that direction.

As Mason rounded the corner, he found you, with your back facing him, standing in front of the oven. Your hair, falling across your shoulders, still held some of the curl that you had done for the event the night prior. Mason’s heart clenched at the sight of you in his shirt and a pair of his sweatpants.

A few pans and bowls were scattered across the stovetop and counters, and Mason recognized all of the components of the hearty breakfast you used to make when both of you had the day off. The combination of smells was so specific, and the déjà vu nearly made him dizzy.

You turned around, reaching for a bowl on the counter and jumped slightly when you saw Mason there.

“Sorry,” he breathed, still at a bit of a loss for words. “Didn’t mean to sneak up on you like that.”

You just gave him a small smile and a short “s’okay” as you turned back to the stove. “Sorry if I woke you.” Your voice sounded so small—Mason hated it. He hated the tension that hung in the air between the two of you. He hated the fact that you had nearly become strangers to each other.

In the hours that you had spent, lying awake with your thoughts running wild in Mason’s bed, you had resolved to avoid complicating things further than they already had been. Things were awkward enough between the two of you after Mason had graciously come to the rescue, despite the ending of your relationship, and you were determined to make it home without making it worse.

You owed it to yourself— your feelings for Mason were still there, hidden just beneath the surface. But you refused to put yourself out there and put your heart through that pain again.

You wished you had it in you to be cold with him, completely cutting off any chance of rekindling something between the two of you— any risk of getting your hopes up. But you knew Mason, and you knew that he often wore his heart on his sleeve, and you couldn’t bring yourself to hurt him like that, either.

But despite your resolve and determination, the sorrow-filled gaze in Mason’s eyes had already begun to pierce through the armor that you had put around your heart.

Out of the corner of your eye, you watched as Mason slipped into one of the chairs on the opposite side of the island countertop. His eyes followed you as you finished preparing the last of the breakfast. You dished out two plates— a portion for yourself and another, larger portion for Mason.

“You didn’t have to do all this, you know?” Mason spoke softly as you set the plate in front of him.

You shrugged, standing on the opposite side of the island from him as you stared down at your own plate. “It’s the least I could do. It’s your food anyway,” you mumbled, poking at your eggs with a fork, suddenly feeling too sick to eat anything.

“Well, thank you, Y/N,” Mason said, earnestly. “I really appreciate it.”

Mason couldn’t help but feel discouraged by your stony demeanor. He had hoped that after the night prior, the two of you might be on the right path to sorting things out between you, but now he wasn’t so sure.

He kept stealing quick glances at you as he ate, savoring every delicious bite. But he could tell how uneasy you felt as you stood there, tucking your hair behind your ear as you took small bites from your plate.

The tension was thick as the two of you ate in silence, neither one sure how to even begin the conversation. Did you talk about last night, or leave the topic untouched?

The longer the silence stretched between the two of you, the heavier the weight on your heart grew. As much as you had tried not to get your hopes up, and as many times as you told yourself that your relationship with Mason was well and truly over, a small part of you had still hoped that he would say something this morning— anything, really. That small part of you wanted to believe that this chance encounter was the key—a sign that the two of you needed to find your way back to each other.

But despite it all, the spark that you had hoped was still there seemed to have been snuffed out.

You kept your eyes glued to your plate, afraid that Mason would see them shining with tears and start asking questions. You didn’t want him to think you were pathetic— needing him to rescue you the night before and now here, standing in his kitchen, crying because he didn’t want you back.

You took a breath and steeled yourself to pack up your things from his room and get the fastest Uber back home you could manage.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in your throat, you scraped the last of your food into the trashcan, no longer able to stomach another bite, and placed the empty dish in the sink. You left the kitchen as quickly as you could, trying to hide your face from Mason as the first tears fell.

Mason was taken by surprise at your sudden rush to leave the room, the noise a stark contrast to the silence that had hung thick in the air. He watched your back as you walked out without so much as a glance in his direction.

His stomach sank. He had hoped, after lying awake all night thinking of you, that you had been cooking breakfast for him as a sort of sign—a signal that you wanted to talk things over again and revisit the topic of him and you. But the unpleasant aura that had remained between the two of you while you ate had gotten you no closer to that conversation.

Maybe he had read too far into things. Maybe the breakfast had just been a ‘thank you’ for driving you back to Manchester last night. Maybe he had pushed too far and inviting you to stay at his was too much, too soon.

Mason pushed his plate away from him, dropping his head into his hands and huffing a sigh as he felt his eyes burn with tears that surprised him. He hadn’t realized just how much the last 24 hours had gotten his hopes up for reigniting a relationship with you until you seemed to have walked away from it altogether.

It was almost like he could feel his heart breaking all over again.

But no, Mason resolved. He refused to let you walk away from him again, not until he had fully expressed to you how deeply he missed you, how much he still cared for you.

With renewed determination, Mason stood from his chair and nearly ran to his bedroom.

Standing outside of his own bedroom door, Mason hesitated for a moment, again overthinking his decision to confront the issue head-on.

But that didn’t last for more than a second before he was tapping his knuckles gently on the door three times.

“You can come in,” he heard your small voice.

When he opened the door, slowly, he found you just returning from the bathroom, several of your own items in hand. As you attempted to collect all of your things, Mason didn’t miss the tear you tried to inconspicuously wipe from your cheek or the soft sniffle you tried to hide with a cough. His heart softened— seeing you cry had always been one of the things he hated most.

“I have an Uber on the way. Should be here any minute. I don’t want to ask you to drive me again,” you spoke hurriedly, as if overcompensating for your fragile state by talking too much. “I can, um, just wash these clothes and drop them off sometime. I really-“

You were cut off when you turned to walk around to the other side of the bed and instead, ran straight into Mason’s chest.

He steadied you with a hand on each of your arms. He held an unreadable expression on his face, and you knew there was no hiding the tear streaks on your cheeks now. However, Mason’s eyes shone with as he looked down at you.

It was silent for several seconds until Mason spoke in a whisper, pleading.

“Don’t go.”

And the silence returned. Your thoughts were spinning a mile a minute. Your mouth dropped open, your brain making its most valiant attempt at forming a response, and yet no words came to you.

Mason took your loss for words as an invitation to continue. “I miss mornings like this. I miss falling asleep with you in my arms and waking up next to you. I miss talking to you at the end of the day,” his lower lip wobbled as he paused to collect himself. “I miss you, Y/N.”

His words pierced right to your heart. Whatever walls you had built to keep him out were nowhere near strong enough and you could already feel them beginning to crumble.

“Letting you walk away was the biggest mistake of my life, and I’ve spent every day since then wishing I could go back and change it all. I would’ve fought harder for you— for us.” Mason pleaded softly. “Seeing you last night made me realize that none of that has gone away, I still feel the way I did before. Please— please tell me you feel it, too.”

The tears poured freely from your eyes now, and there was no holding them back. You rolled your lips into your mouth, attempting to hold in a sob. Mason’s hands left your arms, coming up to cradle your cheeks as you closed your eyes, leaning into his touch. His thumbs swiped at your cheeks, trying to dry your tears.

“I can’t, Mason. W-We can’t,” your voice trembled.

“Why can’t we?” Mason was desperate, resting his forehead against yours. The proximity was making your head spin, the feeling of his breath fanning across your face too familiar, too overwhelming.

“Who’s to say it won’t be the same as the last time?” you cried, finally looking back at him. “I can’t go through that pain, not again.”

“We decide that it’ll be different.” Mason was ready to get on his knees and beg if he had to. “Things will be better this time— I’ll be better.”

He knew that what you had was worth fighting for, and if there was any chance—even a shred of hope—that you would give him another shot, he had to take it.

You looked up into his tear-filled eyes as he whispered, “I just know I can’t lose you, Y/N, not again.”

Like a dam breaking loose, a sob wracked your body at his words. Whatever had been left of the walls you had built up came crashing to the ground. Mason was quick to pull you into his chest, resting his cheek on the top of your head as he rubbed soothing circles into your back.

It was like all of the hurt and emotions from the last eight months tore through you at once. Mason, feeling the way your frame was shaking, held you tightly to him, as if he were the only thing holding you together in that moment. He kissed the top of your head, and you could hear him sniffle, knowing that he was crying, too.

As your cries grew softer and you began to calm down, you clutched Mason’s shirt tightly in your fists, afraid that if you released him, he would disappear.

Mason eventually leaned back to look at you and you lifted your head from where it was buried in his chest. There was the softest hint of a smile on his face as he tried to wipe away the remaining tears.

“I-If we do this…” Mason’s tummy flipped at your words, clinging to the sense of hope that they brought. “If we give this another chance, we have to take it slow.”

Mason nodded quickly, his eyes flicking all over your face for any sign of hesitation. “Anything you need, love. Anything at all.”

Your lower lip wobbled as you took him in. “I’ve missed you so much, Masey.”

Mason pressed his lips firmly to your forehead, his heart soaring at the use of his nickname. “I’m here now, and I’m not leaving— never again.”

You leaned forward, pressing your face into his neck and hugged him again, trying to drink if the feeling of being back in his arms. You let him overwhelm your senses— the feeling of his arms around your body, his comforting scent as you breathed him in, the sound of his heartbeat that calmed you so easily.

“I know we’re taking it slow, but I have a couple more hours until training,” Mason spoke softly as you pulled back, looking up at him. A hopeful smile played on his lips. “Will you stick around? Cancel your Uber. I can take you home on my way.”

“Are you sure?” There was still that shred of lingering doubt, the fear of imposing yourself.

“I’m so sure,” he smiled. “I don’t think i’m ready to let go of you just yet.”

You couldn’t stop the giggle that escaped your lips before you whispered a soft “okay.”

Never, when you left for the gala the night before, did you think this was where you would find yourself—back at Mason’s house, as he led you to the couch to cuddle while you talked about what your next steps would be. But as you lay in his arms, admiring the soft scattering of freckles across his cheeks, you felt a piece of your heart that had been missing those last few months begin to heal.

And you couldn’t be more thankful that you had your boy back.

As always, your feedback is greatly appreciated!!! 🤍

tag list:

@hischierswhore @thoseboysinblue @lovelynikol16 @swimmingismywholelife @masonsrem @brasiliangp @neverinadream @lizzypotter14 @notsoattractivearenti @chilwellspulisic @sid-vii @captainpulisic

[pit-and-the-pen]

Birthday Present

Birthday fic for @sarawritestories.

Summary: Cassian was gone during your birthday and shows up while you’re at work to make up for it. 

Warnings: Smut (18+), P in v, Oral (f/m receiving), spit, collars/leash, fingering. 

WC: 4.1k

This was probably the longest you had been separated from Cassian since the mating bond had snapped. You weren’t mad per say but you missed your mate like crazy. Not to mention that he had missed your birthday three days ago. You knew that he had wanted to be there, he made sure to top the previous year's celebration every time. And he always managed to deliver. Somehow after being mated for more than fifty years, he had never disappointed. But this year he was helping finally start to train the females in Windhaven. Something that you knew he had been fighting for for so long, how could you be mad at him for being there when that’s what was keeping him away.

Your birthday party was amazing nonetheless. Cassian had left detailed instructions for Nesta and Gwen as to how the party would go. He made sure to order your favorite foods well in advance, even having your present delivered first thing in the morning along with a bouquet of pink and white roses that was so large it took two people to deliver it. It filled the house with the scent of roses. The smell almost makes up for the lack of your favorite smell in the whole world, that citrus and salt smell that always seemed to accompany Cassian. The other part of your gift was a ruby choker with a piece of his siphon carved into the same shape as the diamond on your wedding band. You had nearly cried when you opened the box and had sent the image of you wearing it to your mate and the satisfied rush of lust you received back only proved how much he liked it too. You wish he had been there when you opened it, wish you could have shown him just how much you appreciated the piece of him that you now wore around your neck. Everyone already damn well knew who your mate was but the weight of it around your neck served as a warm reminder for you. 

You rolled out of bed when your alarm went off, your mouth felt like someone had stuffed cotton balls in it. Nesta, Gwen and Elain had made sure that you properly celebrated your birthday last night. The empty bottles of wine and some clear liquor you didn't bother asking the name of proved as much. You gulped down the glass of water you had the sense to place out the night before and began to get dressed for the day. 

You picked one of your favorite skirts. Long by fae standards, nearly brushing your calf. A swirling floral pattern offset the dark green of the background. You tucked in the long sleeved cream sweater and gave a small twirl in the mirror, watching the way the skirt fanned out around you as you did so. Your hair was quickly thrown into a high ponytail and you made sure to pull the necklace out from the high neck of the sweater. The charm just visible. 

Quickly grabbing a slice of toast and some left over fruit from last night, you grabbed your bag and walked out the door. The slight chill in the morning air made you thankful for the sweater but you knew by the time the sun rose you would be sweating. The sound of your shoes hitting the cobblestoned street was the only sound that filled the air. You loved these quiet moments in the early morning. It gave you time to really soak in the beauty of Velaris. The way the rainbow street near your little shop shone in the faint rays of sunlight. The way the city itself seemed to hum with the sleeping breaths of its inhabitants. It was one of your favorite times to be out. You fished around in your bag for the ring of keys to unlock the store and stood in the doorway as you waited for the flights to kick on.

 You loved the shop with all of your heart. It had been a mating present from Rhys. Your very own book store. The dark wood and dim lights made it seem so cozy. Cozy chairs and booths would be  full of readers or writers thanks to the little cafe you had thought to add. Plus it had some of the best pastries in all of Velrais, so you’ve been told. 

You switched the books on display for the day, putting your most recent read on the table next to a few new releases you had just gotten at the end of the day yesterday. Swirling letters were drawn on the sign next to them along with a small doddle to tell a little bit about the book and then you were ready to open the store, flipping the small “open” sign that Feyre had painted for you. You pulled the book you started last night out of your bag and sat down as you waited for people to start coming in.

The day seemed to drag by. It was relatively slow, only a few people coming in and out throughout the day. A few of your regulars sat in the cafe area, the soft sound of pens on paper and book pages turning became a gentle white noise that was starting to make your eyes heavy. You decided to get up to do something so you wouldn’t fall asleep.

You sighed heavily as you stacked another book on the shelf, rearranging the shop for the third time that month. You really did miss Cassian. The store seemed just a little too empty without him. He would always stop by to bring you lunch because he knows that you get so caught up in whatever task you were doing that day that you would forget otherwise. Sometimes he would just spend hours at the small high top table yapping away at whatever crossed his mind and you would have a smile on your face for the rest of the day. 

Eventually the last of the customers packed up, calling their goodbyes as they walked out of the door.  You sent your one cafe worker, Flora home for the day when they left. The sun was still high in the sky but you just wanted to be home. Cassian would be home later today and you wanted the time to clean up a little bit. Maybe make dinner after taking a nap. So you kept staking books, telling yourself you would leave once you emptied the cart next to the front counter. Too caught up to hear the front bell of the shop ring, you nearly jumped out of your skin when you heard someone clear their throat. You cursed softly to yourself, you must have forgotten to lock the door. 

“Sorry we’re closed-” You turned around and a squeal left your mouth as you took in just exactly who was standing in the shop. Of course it was Cassian. His smell quickly flooded your senses and you put down the heavy book in your hand to launch yourself at him. You arms wrapped around his neck at the same time his arms wound around your waist. You buried your face into his chest as he squeezed you tighter against him. 

“You weren’t supposed to get home until later. I would have closed up earlier if I had known.” You smiled up at him, basking in his presence.. 

“I wanted to get home to you, darling. Maybe even surprise you.” He leaned down to give you a teasing kiss. “Gods I missed you” He said once he pulled away from your lips. You wanted to pout at the loss of his plush lips against yours. Suddenly hyper aware of the fact that you haven't seen him in over a week. Your cheeks started to heat as you looked into his eyes, saw that he was clearly thinking the same thing. You were just about to tell him to take you home when he leaned down to whisper in your ear.

“I locked the front door.” His words only stoked the fire in your stomach. His gravelly voice telling you exactly what he meant. And at that moment, you wouldn’t have cared if he had. All thoughts eddied out of your head except for the feeling of your mates skin against yours. He gave a slow kiss to the spot below your ear and a shiver ran through you. His hands go up to play with the necklace sitting just above your shirt. 

“I want to see you in this.” He gave it a slight tug, pulling your chin up with it. “Only this.” You whimpered as he forced you to look him in the eye. Fidgeting under his heated stare. “But that can wait until later. For now…” He kissed down your neck, down the little bits of exposed skin along your collarbone and started to sink down to his knees. He looked up at you, silently asking for permission as his hands started to snake up your ankles, pulling your long skirt up along with it. All it took was your little nod before he slipped your skirt down your hips entirely. He buried his face into your lace underwear, a small cry falling from your lips. His fingers hooked over the edge of the lacy fabric and began to pull them teasingly slow down your legs. He didn’t hesitate to flatten his tongue and give your fold one long swipe.

Your hand rushed out to grab the bookshelf beside you, knocking some of the covers to the floor in a loud crash. The giggle that you let out quickly turned into a moan as Cassian’s nose bumped your clit. The free hand tangled itself in his pulled back hair, loosening some of the strand from the bun. His response was sinking his teeth into the flesh at your tight. Your fingers harshly yanking at long locks. He licked teasingly over the mark his mouth had left. 

“God I love these.” He muttered as he kneaded your plush thighs. He gave you a quick glance before he shoved his face back into your weeping cunt. Rough hands pulling your hips closer to his relentless mouth, arms nearly supporting all of your weight like it was nothing to him. The angle gave you a good look at the muscles in his back as they flexed as he moved his head, his wings pulled in tight to avoid the shelves of books. You bit your fingers to hold back the string of moans falling from your lips. His teeth scraped lightly over your clit and you were bucking away from his mouth. Suddenly too much but that didn’t stop him. He whimpered as he pulled your hips closer again. The soft grunts leaving his mouth and the way his tongue was licking into your hole had you barrling over the edge before you could even think to tell him. You screamed around your fingers, head falling back against the bookshelf you were now completely leaning against. Cassian is still licking you through your orgasm. Your eyes fluttered open and you nearly jumped when you felt a finger at your entrance. He was grinning up at you, chin shiny with your arousal. His gaze didn’t leave yours as he sunk two fingers in, palm resting perfectly on your clit. 

“Look at the way you suck my fingers in. So good for me.” He said into the skin of your thighs as he started to pump those fingers in and out of you. You squirmed against his fingers, hip twisting as he started to speed us his motions. He grabbed one of your legs and slung it over his shoulder, opening you up wider for him. Your hand was doing nothing to conceal the squeals and high pitched moans leaving your mouth. So you just let them fall freely. 

“Cassian…Fuck. Please” You babbled, not entirely sure what you were begging for. For more, for him to stop, for him to speed up. You had no clue but you knew that you were going to explode if he wasn’t inside of you right this minute. His fingers didn’t slow down for a second, the veins in his arm starting to pop out as he flexed at the speed. Despite your brain screaming otherwise, your hand reached down to his wrist. He stilled instantly. Eyes suddenly full of concern. 

You only pulled him up by the collar of his shirt, hands going to undo his belt. 

“Darling. Hold on-” His words died off with a small whine as your hand wrapped around his hardened length. 

“No. Cassian I’m going to die if you don’t fuck me right now.” Your voice was breathy and shaky. The need to have your mate inside you is too strong all of the sudden. 

“I could get you home in-”

“Please. Need you now.” You begged, moving your hand up and down, squeezing when you reached the base. His hips bucked and a small huff left his lips. 

“I wanted to make it special since it was your birthday but…fuck. I warned you, princess.” He said, head leaning against yours as he lightly brushed your hand away. He pushed his pants down to let his cock fully spring out. Despite being mated to him for so long, his cock always made you balk just a little. The length so thick your fingers just barely touched when you wrapped your hand around it. “Jump.” Was all he said as his hands went to cup the back of your thighs. You did so with a practiced ease. Your ankles wrapping around his back as he lined himself up with your dripping folds. You both hissed as his tip nudged into you. He didn’t wait for you to adjust, slamming all the way in. His pace was relentless. The pace of his thrusts caused the bookshelf to rattle against the wall. Your mouth parted into a perfect o shape. Cassian just squeezed your jaw, opening your mouth up further for him to place a claiming kiss on your lips. The kiss was just as messy as his strokes, his tongue licking into your mouth. You moaned as you tasted yourself on his lips. A perfect mixture of the two of you. You wrapped your legs around him tighter, using it as leverage to pull him into you. He growled into the kiss, teeth digging into your lower lip. Your back arched into his chest and his hand moved from your jaw to wrap around your ponytail. He yanked on the hair, tipping your head further back, effectively pinning you into place. 

“Cas. Cas please. I’m gonna cum.”

“Then cum.” His teeth nip your earlobe right as his fingers come to rub tight circles on your clit. You are a goner. Your legs twitch against his back, his name pouring past your lips as he fucks your through your orgasm. His thrusts slow down, becoming languid strokes as he nears his own high. Your lips are all over him. Trailing exhausted kisses to his jaw, hands clutching at the fabric of his shirt that somehow managed to stay on during your actions. He stilled inside of you as you felt the muscles in his abdomen tighten before the warm rush of his cum filled you. His head dipped into the crook of your neck before you were whispering into his ear.

“Take me home right now.” And he didn’t need to be told twice. Before you could even process it, he had your skirt buttoned back at your waist. Underwear slid back up your legs. Not a single hair was out of place as he scooped you up in his arms and flew you back to your apartment. 

------

The door had barely closed behind before your lips attached to his. Your hands gripped the front of his shirt, pulling him down to you. You felt the door shudder behind you as he pushed your back against it. Both of your hands were everywhere. Clothes peeled off with no regard for where they ended up. 

“I never got to show you the best part of your present. Stay here.” He placed a kiss on your forehead before walking over to his bedside table and grabbing a small fabric pouch. He walked back over to you and slowly pulled out the contents of the bag. A long silver chain with a leather loop on the end. Your eyes widened as you placed two and two together. 

“Only if you want to. That’s why I wanted-”

“Yes.” You blurted out. A blush took over your face but he only smiled at you. 

“Then on your knees, darling.” He was suddenly towering over you and you loved every second of it. The carpet was soft under your knees and you sunk down. Your hands folded onto your thighs and your chin tilted up to look at him. He sucked in a heavy breath as your eyes met. A tender hand reached out to cup under your chin, tilting your chin further back and he crouched down to hook the chain into the large ring holding the piece of his siphon. You felt the added weight and goosebumps rose to your skin as he let the cold metal lay against your face. 

“How does it feel?” 

“Good.” Your mouth felt so heavy. 

“Safe sign?” 

“Two taps to slow down, three to stop.” You didn’t hesitate to answer, need rushing through you as he stood back up. His length right at your eye line. You felt saliva pool in your mouth. 

He gave the leash a gentle tug, pulling your head back ever so slightly. 

“Open.” You did immediately. But instead of his cock he leaned down again, hand squeezing your jaw open wider, and you felt his spit enter your mouth. You couldn’t even process the way it made your stomach clench before he was thrusting into your mouth. His spit makes his cock glide easily against your tongue. You kept your jaw lax, waiting for the command to close your lips around him. This was something you and Cassian had discussed a number of times. And it was even better than you imagined it could have been. 

“Suck sweetheart. Show me what that pretty mouth can do.” And you did. You wrapped your lips around his thick length. Reveling in the weight of it against your tongue. A moan built in the back of your throat and was choked off with a sharp tug of the leash. He slipped all the way to the back of your throat. Thanks to years of practice, you took him with ease. He released some of the tension on the chain and you slid back, only for him to repeat the action again and again. Your cheeks were on fire at this point. Tears prickling in the corners of your eyes. The wonderful fuzzy feeling in your head told you just how hard he was fucking your mouth. You didn’t want it to end. You could feel him twitching in your mouth and it was too much. The burn between your thighs is too much to ignore. One of your hands snuck its way between your thighs and you had just slipped a finger inside of your weeping hole before he tugged the leash back. You whined at the feeling of his cum against your fingers.

“Fuck. Do you like my cock in your mouth that much?” He gritted out. A long string of spit connecting from your lips to his glistening member. You didn’t take your eyes off of it as you nodded your head. Nor did you stop the motion of your fingers.

“Words.” He tugged the leash up to make you look at him.  

“Yes sir. I love it.” He shuddered at your words. As he took in your blown wide pupils, his cock twitched and you surged forward to wrap your lips around it again but he held tight onto the chain. 

“Get on the bed.” He ordered and you pulled your fingers out of yourself slowly, feeling your walls clench around nothing. He pulled you up to your feet, a calloused hand resting under your arm as he let you get your feet underneath you. He tugged you over to the bed and helped you climb onto the bed. You were about to flip onto your back but a strong arm wrapped around your waist stopped you. 

“Hands and knees.” He whispered into your ear. You felt a wave of slick coat your thighs as you arched your back for him. His hands rubbed up the back of your thighs, landing on your ass. You pushed back into his touch, savoring the warmth of his hands on your skin. He reached a hand between your legs and shoved a single finger into you. Your arms collapsed underneath you as he immediately found that spot inside of you. Your hips start to move on their own and you felt a tug on the leash, forcing you up onto your elbow again. You back arching even more as he held all your weight on that single chain. You panted as his fingers slowly stroked inside of you. 

“Are you ready for me, sweet girl?” 

“Yes. Please sir.” The words split off of your tongue and he was thrusting into you. The leash held you in place as he pounded into you. The sound of his hips hitting your ass filled the room. You could feel the way your thighs recoiled against the torturous pace. You were held in place, hips unable to push back, head held in the air. You reached a hand back, needing to feel your mate to ground you. He quickly intertwined your fingers, holding your hand. The gentleness of the action is a vast contrast to the way his trust speeds up. You were jolted forward with each frenzied push of his hips. You could feel every inch of him pushing your walls apart. You writhed under him, muscles shaking as you fought to keep yourself up. You gave a particularly hard jerk and you felt the tension on the leash drop and your face was against the pillow. You heard the sound of the chain hitting the bed under you and Cassian wrapped both of his hands around your thighs. He used the new position to pull you against him in time with his thrusts. Loud mewls being pulled from your lips. You were completely drunk on the feeling of him inside of you as you felt that knot build in you. It felt different from earlier. You struggled to get out the words to let Cassian know, but he always knew. He knew your body better than you at this point. He glided a hand over your stomach, pressing down on the soft flesh right above where he was inside you. The pressure had you screaming his name as your vision went white. You felt your release drip down your thighs, felt the way in leaked down around him. Cassian cursed before he whined above you. 

“Look at you darling. You squirted for me.” His thrusts did not falter in the slightest. The lewd sounds of your wetness filled the room as you hummed against the pillow. Utterly fucked out. His pace stuttered once, twice and then a carnal growl left his lips as his hips stilled. You felt him empty himself inside of you. Staying fully sheathed inside of you as shudders wracked through his body. His hands were everywhere then. Rubbing all over your back, over your legs. He eventually pulled out of you and pulled you against his chest. 

Quick kisses were peppered all over your face as his hand went to detach the leash from your necklace. You gave your neck a quick roll as the added weight was removed. His hands instantly come up to rub any added tension. He stepped out of the room long enough to grab a wet wash cloth and gently clean between your legs. Giving you a small kiss when you jumped from the additional stimulation. He threw the washcloth somewhere in the room before he pulled you into his arms again.

He laid you down on the bed, placing you on his chest. His hands are still rubbing small circles all over your skin. The perfect amount of pressure to bring you back down to earth. 

“Thank you.” You whispered against his chest. He chuckled and pressed a kiss to the crown of your head. 

“Happy birthday, darling.” was the last thing you heard before his gentle breathing lulled you to sleep.

Taglist: @daycourtofficial @milswrites @ninthcircleofprythian @prythianpages @dawneternal @lady-of-tearshed @writingcroissant @readychilledwine @nocasdatsgay @velariscalling @tsunami-of-tears @stormhearty @utterlyazriel @historiaxvanserra @acotarxreader @illyrianbitch @itsswritten

[libraryofolive]

𝓛𝓸𝓼𝓽 𝓽𝓲𝓶𝓮

Featuring: Nanami Kento x fem!reader Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort, gets fluffy towards the end Word count: 6.6k Like this? You can find my smaus here and my drabbles and other fics here! Do you also have a request? You can find my rules for requesting here! Synopsis: Nanami Kento left sorcery - and you, his best friend - behind two years ago. So what happens when you, still pissed off at him, get assigned a mission together?

Divider by saradika-graphics

"No. I'm not working with him. I refuse." You seethed at Yaga, blatantly ignoring the man stood next to you in his beige suit and blue shirt, his reflective glasses blocking his eyes from your view - not that you would grace him with eye contact in the first place.

"You don't get a choice. The two of you were specifically chosen for this mission. I know you have some... history... but the fact is, you were a good team. The two of you worked well together. You need to do the same now."

"Absolutely not. I will do it alone if I have to."

"Not possible. It's too dangerous for one sorc-"

"Then make Gojo do it." You snapped. You looked Kento Nanami, who had been eerily silent through both Yaga's briefing and the argument that followed it, up and down, a frown etched into your face.

"Gojo is currently overseas. You two are to exorcise these curses together. End of discussion." At Yaga's words, you stormed out of his office. Deep down, you knew that you were being childish, throwing a tantrum that reeked of immaturity and unprofessionalism. You were considering leaning into your rage filled, angsty teenage state of mind and punching a wall when Nanami emerged from the office.

"I'm not talking to you." You spat at him, voice laced with venom.

"That's fine. But I expect you to be at least professional whilst we share this mission." He folded his arms across his chest, one eyebrow raised at you.

"Fuck off." The audacity of this man, acting superior to you when you were the more experienced sorcerer in this situation, considering he had been off playing corporate scumbag the past two years.

"I thought you weren't talking to me."

You raised your middle finger at him, turning around and walking away. Who the fuck did he think he is? Who gave him the right to act like that towards you?

This mission was going to be hell.

-

When you first started your education at Jujutsu Tech, Kento Nanami... intimidated you. Being a third of your first year class, he seemed the brooding type, the only emotion you ever really saw on his face being irritation. He was the opposite of your other classmate, Haibara, who was all sunshine and smiles. Where you and Haibara got on well enough, you opted more to avoid Nanami like the plague, at least, initially.

As the three of you started to fight curses together, you learnt to trust your classmates. You knew that they would always have your back in the dangerous scrapes you were often plunged into, even if you were unsure if you could really call them your friends. You felt like an outsider when the three of you were together - Haibara and Nanami's friendship blossomed quickly, but you felt like your connection to the boys was lagging behind.

"Boys are idiots, I would know." Shoko had once said between puffs of her cigarette when you asked for her advice about the situation. Due to the small number of girls attending Jujutsu High the two of you had bonded over the shared trauma of always being outnumbered, and you felt the closest to her out of all of your fellow students. "I wouldn't worry about it," she continued, "I was the same with Gojo and Geto. You'll click eventually."

"That doesn't fill me with much confidence." You frowned, "I'm not sure that it'll ever happen. I mean, I trust them with my life-"

"You have to do that-"

"and I respect them heaps. They're talented sorcerers, and they're both so brave. I don't think I've seen either of them break a sweat on our missions. But apart from sorcery, I don't know if we have anything in common."

"You worry too much." Shoko poked your nose condescendingly, smiling to show she was kidding around. Still, your brow furrowed, another protest on the tip of your tongue. "Seriously. You've only actually known them a short while. Give it some time. Not everyone becomes friends straight away."

"I guess you're right.." You sighed, conceding.

"I always am. It'd be a good idea to learn that." Your friend winked at you, making you roll your eyes at her antics.

But, she was right, eventually. Haibara had - unbeknownst to you - overheard your conversation, and resolved to try harder to befriend you properly.

"C'mon, Nanami, she seemed sad!" He exclaimed as he told your other classmate about what he had overheard.

"I'm not like you, Haibara. I'm not great at this making friends stuff."

"Well, you made me your friend. What's one more?"

"You are the reason we're friends. Your unrelenting pleasantness eventually wore me down."

"Oh please. You're funny, smart, and a great sorcerer. That's friendship material right there."

"If you say so."

"I'm not saying you have to be her best friend in the whole universe. Let's just try and include her a bit more, okay? Actually respond to her when she asks you a question rather than just grunting in her general direction." Nanami grunted in response to Haibara, making him laugh.

"See? Funny!"

-

The car ride to the abandoned hospital where the two first grade curses you were to exorcise were hidden was so tense, Ijichi thought he could cut that tension with a knife. He gulped, pulling at his collar, the sound filling the eerie silence of the car.

"So, er, it's been a while since you two saw each other, hasn't it? Isn't it nice to know the other is well." He said, attempting to fill a void made of awkward silence and angry looks.

"So nice." You replied sarcastically, rolling your eyes. You knew that you would have to apologise to Ijichi after this trip - it wasn't fair for him to get caught in the crossfire that was your tattered friendship with the man sitting next to you. Nanami knew this too, and felt it necessary to scold you.

"Your problem is with me, not him. Please don't project your hatred of me onto an innocent bystander." Still refusing to talk to him, you simply flicked his face.

"How mature."

You leant over to flick him again, but Ijichi spoke once again. "What lovely weather we're having!" In an attempt to stop a brawl breaking out in the back of his car, Ijichi had said the first thing that had come to his mind, paying no mind to the actual weather, which was pouring down with rain.

"Yes, quite pleasant." Nanami hummed in agreement, but sceptically eyeing the outside world from the pleasant heat of the car.

"Oh shut up." Your eyes narrowed at him, words icy cold.

"Are we talking again now?" He raised a brow at you, that smug expression from outside of Yaga's office back on his disgustingly handsome face.

Your ensuing flick to his cheek caused his expression of smugness to turn into one of irritation.

-

After your conversation with Shoko, you had noticed a shift in your dynamic with your classmates. Haibara had started asking you more questions directly, purposefully bringing you into the conversations between him and Nanami. He also sought to spend time with you out of class, one on one, and soon a real friendship clicked into place just like Shoko said it would. I guess she was right, you thought, not that I'd ever admit that.

Soon, group movie nights became a tradition. You would sneak into their section of the dorms every Friday, the three of you taking turns to choose what film would be that night's entertainment. You had begun to appreciate the stupid action/comedy films Haibara favoured, whilst you forced the two to watch childhood classics they had never seen.

"I am not watching another Barbie film." Nanami used to sulk.

"Well, it's my turn to choose, and this is what I have chosen."

"Yeah, Nanami, the rules of movie night dictate that we have to watch whatever the person in charge of picking chooses. That means if someone choses a Barbie film, we have to watch it."

"We have watched five already. Please, choose a different film." He aimed the last half of his words at you.

"Nah, I don't think I will. And I know you secretly enjoyed the last one."

"I did not!"

"You most certainly did! I saw you smile at the happy ending!" Haibara joined in your teasing of the blonde.

"I was only smiling because it was over."

"Excuses, excuses." You dismissed his rebuttal, grinning as you pressed play on the film.

Your relationships with the two developed quickly as these group hang outs became more and more frequent. However, there was always more distance between you and Nanami than you and Haibara. Until one week, when Haibara fell ill, messaging you to let you know:

Too ill for movie night :( What? Noooooo! Reschedule? Don't be silly. You and Nanami have one without me!

You paused at his suggestion. Sure, you and Nanami had hung out outside of class together. But never just the two of you, and always instigated by Haibara. Would it be awkward? You were just watching a movie, you reasoned, so it would be acceptable to just sit next to each other in silence. Outside of your better judgement, you found yourself once again sneaking into the boys' dorms.

"What are you doing here?" Nanami questioned when he saw you.

"Movie night, duh. What are we watching? It's your turn to choose."

"But Haibara isn't well."

"He told me to just do it without him... unless you don't want to? I can just head back to my-"

"NO! Er, no, it's fine. We'll watch something. I haven't thought about what to watch, so let me go raid my DVDs." He blushed at his slight outburst, and the thought of spending time, alone, with you. It was hard enough to not embarrass himself in front of you when Haibara was around to distract you, but alone? Sat right next to you?

"Okay, cool. I brought popcorn." You grinned at him, holding up the bright bag of the sweet food.

"Oh, thanks..." He trailed off, staring intently at the bag you held in your hands.

"The movie, Nanami?" You asked.

"Oh, yeah. One sec." He wandered into his room, silently cursing himself from being such an idiot. He emerged with two DVDs in hand.

"These are the only two decent ones I've got. What do you think?" He handed them to you, letting you look over the synopsis of each one. They were artsy ones, and you were pretty sure one of them was French.

"Are these yours?" You asked curiously, looking them up and down.

"Well, yeah. Why else would I have them?" He replied as he tried to plug his DVD player into the TV.

"They're just so... different from what you usually pick."

"Oh, I just pick those stupid action ones because I know Haibara likes them, and you like to make fun of him for liking them. It keeps you both happy, even if I don't find them particularly pleasing."

"Jeez, Nanami, you're making me feel bad for forcing you to sit through all of my Barbie films."

"Those aren't... atrocious. I have unfortunately found myself singing some of the songs as I go about my day."

"I knew you secretly enjoyed them! No one can resist the allure of Bibble."

"Never say that sentence ever again. And don't repeat what I said, either. Now have you chosen which film you would prefer?"

"It's your turn to choose, Nanami. Put whichever one you prefer on." You hand him the two DVD cases before making yourself comfortable on the couch of the communal dorm area, wrapping yourself in the blanket you had brought from your own dormitory.

"Or whichever one you can comment on the least."

"Oh please, you enjoy my running commentary on the movies we watch."

"In your dreams." He slotted one of the DVDs in the player, pressed play and joined you on the couch, sitting as far away from you as he possibly could.

"God, Nanami, I don't bite. You can sit a bit closer to me." He shuffled along a little bit, and you decided to make yourself even more comfortable by putting your feet onto his lap.

"What do you think you're doing?" He asked, cocking his eyebrow - an expression that never seemed to leave his face around you.

"Getting comfy." You grinned at him before turning your attention to the TV, missing the pink tinge to his cheeks.

-

"We should split up." Nanami's baritone voice rang out through the halls of the abandoned hospital. It wasn't silent - the rain falling through the large hole in the ceilings and roof prevented noiselessness.

"I'm happy to do that if it means I can get on with this away from you."

"That is what 'split up' means."

"Who do you think you are, Fred from Scooby-Doo?" You glared at him. The downpour you had gotten caught in had flattened his styled hair into a look that somewhat resembled his signature cut back in high school. He still looked stupidly good, you thought, but you had always found him attractive.

"Can you stop with the theatrics? I don't want to be here just as much as you."

"I'll take the higher floors. You stay here." You stormed off, something you always seem to be doing around him nowadays. Nanami sighed. He didn't know what he expected when he returned to sorcery and saw you again, but it certainly wasn't this much hostility. Had you harboured this towards him the entire time he wasn't around?

"Be careful." He called after you, still wishing you safety despite how little you currently cared for him. Your only acknowledgement of his words was another middle finger hurled at him from over your shoulder. He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose in annoyance. Between you and the two first grade spirits running around this place, it was going to be a long day.

-

After that movie night, you found yourself actually considering Nanami Kento your friend. Once Haibara recovered from his cold, he was slightly confused about the new closeness between his two friends, but he was as happy as you were that the three of you had bonded. He was also confused as to why you kept on bringing up a 'Bibble' around your shared friend, but he laughed along with you every time you did.

Eventually, there came a time where the two of you were practically joined at the hip. Nanami was thrilled with your newfound friendship, knowing that without Haibara’s pushing - and an illness that Nanami was convinced wasn’t as bad as Hairbara had told you both it was - he knew he would have never had the nerve to speak to you, nevermind be your friend. But part of him knew that he would never be satisfied being just your friend. You were the first thing he thought about when he woke up, and the last thing before he slept. He found himself being reminded of you in everything he did - the stars were the twinkle in your eye when you were talking about one of your passions. The sun’s rays were the warmth of your smile, something that could bring light into even the darkest of days.

Nanami found himself sat across from you at a restaurant. To onlookers, it would probably look like a date, two young people sharing each other’s company for a pleasant evening. Haibara, who usually accompanied the two of you on outings like this, had been sent to exorcise a curse in a different city and wouldn’t be back until the next day. As much as Nanami missed his friend, he was glad to have some alone time with you, even if it wasn’t the romantic date he wished it was.

“Okay, I need to know,” you said between mouthfuls of your food, “why the hell does Gojo call you Nanamin?”

“To wind me up, no doubt. He knows how much I hate it.”

“You hate it? But it’s so cute! I think it fits you nicely.” He raised an eyebrow at you, as if to ask if you were being serious. It made you giggle.

“I’m just playing. But I do like it. Maybe I’ll start using it.”

“Please don’t.” Nanami cringed at the thought of you and Gojo sharing the same nickname for him.

“You’re no fun.” You pouted slightly, and God did he want to kiss your pout away. His face warmed at the thought, before mentally scolding himself for thinking inappropriately. “So what can I call you?” You continued.

“Kento. Please, just call me Kento.”

“Your first name? Wow, we must really be friends,” you grinned at him, “Kento.” Yeah, Kento thought, he could get used to you calling him by his first name.

-

Haibara was an observant person, and he easily picked up on the slight shift your friendship with Nanami was making every day. The shyness that sometimes made itself apparent, the red tinges to your cheeks every time you stood a little too close together. Your teasing towards Nanami dialled up a notch, and he was often found stumbling over his words in an attempt to respond. Gone was the reserved, nonchalant persona that intimidated you when you first met him, and it was slowly being replaced by a crushing schoolboy.

Not that you noticed, or were faring any better. Shoko was frequently on the receiving end of your lovesick rambles.

"And when he raises the one eyebrow at me? All cocky and teasing after I say something stupid, God, Shoko, I just want to melt."

"Can we go back to you ranting about how you couldn't make friends with him? Somehow I think I prefer that." She nudged you with her elbow, grinning.

"Oh shut up! You have to hear about my love life because you don't have one to tell me about."

"Well fuck you too!" The both of you laughed, these joking barbs a key factor of your friendship. "I am happy for you. For finally managing to force them into being your friend and for liking one of them enough to actually have a crush on them."

"You're happy that I have an all-consuming crush on a guy that definitely doesn't like me back? Some friend you are."

"It keeps my life interesting, what can I say?" She pulled a packet of cigarettes out of her pocket, taking one out and putting it to her lips. "But he definitely likes you back." She said as she fished around in her pockets for a lighter.

"You're just saying that to make me feel better." You replied as you took a lighter out of your own pocket and lit her cigarette for her.

"Since when do you carry a lighter?"

"Since you can never find yours."

"I knew we were friends for a reason." She puffed on her cigarette, leaning onto to stair behind her on the outdoor staircase you were currently sat on. "Seriously though. I've seen you guys interact. He's into you. You should ask him out."

"Maybe."

"You're pathetic. It's never gonna happen if you don't do anything about it." She blew her cigarette smoke into your face, making you cough slightly.

"I thought the guy was supposed to do the asking."

"Have you met the guys? They're all too much of a wimp to do any asking. It's up to us girls, as always."

-

Nanami had found one of the cursed spirits on the first floor of the abandoned building, and exorcised it without much effort. This, however, didn't put him at ease. If that curse was easy to defeat, yet this mission was dangerous enough to warrant sending the both of you on it, what did the other curse have in store? Or had the higher ups just over-estimated how dangerous the curse was? Sure, the one he had exorcised looked even more menacing than your average curse, but there was not much substance to back up those looks.

He paused, trying to pull a logical plan together. Should he go and find you? Now that one curse had been exorcised, there should only be one left in the building, so it could be beneficial for the two of you to reconvene and tackle it together, although finding it could take much longer. There was also the fact that you were so adamant in being stubborn and not talking to him, unless it was to chew him out for whatever reason you thought appropriate. If you refused to work with him, then it would make more sense for you two to stay apart and cover more ground. He hated that he couldn't read you as well as he used to, and that he couldn't fully rely on your trust anymore. Although, did he really deserve your trust? Your unwavering belief in your abilities as a team, something you had even before your friendship at high school? He left Jujutsu to become yet another cog in the corporate machine, only to return with his tail between his legs two years later.

He resolved to hunt you down and explain the situation, and base the rest of his strategy on your reaction. Surely, if you understood what you could be dealing with, you would put your vitriol aside for the sake of survival. Wouldn't you?

-

You had taken Shoko's words to heart, and planned to tell Nanami about your feelings for him. Even if he didn't reciprocate them, you could have some closure and move on from this silly crush. Right?

You spent a few weeks mulling over how to do it and what to say. You wanted to do it right, to do it perfectly, as if your gesture could cosmically alter his feelings towards you and make him like you back. When he and Haibara were away on a mission together, you planned it all out with the help of Shoko, who was impressed that you were actually acting on your feelings. You would greet the two when they arrived back, before asking Nanami for a private word and quietly confessing when you were both alone.

You didn't expect Haibara to arrive back in a body bag.

When Nanami - Kento - told you what had happened, you fell to your knees, your body wracked with sobs. Any previous fixations on romance left your body and gave way to an aching grief, mourning over your friend. The dynamic of your class had once again shifted, but this time, a gaping hole was left. It felt as if Haibara had taken all of the warmth and sun to the afterlife with him, his happy disposition being sorely missed in a room full of loss and sadness.

All of a sudden, it was just you and Kento. The two of you became inseparable, your grief slowly bringing the two of you even further together. It felt as though he was the only one who could understand you, that understood what you were going through as you powered on with your Jujutsu education, saving as many as you could. You wanted to act on your feelings for him, like you had once resolved to, but neither of you could escape the reality of the danger of your profession - what was once a looming warning, one of the infinite possibilities of the future, now became one of the two paths you could walk: live or die.

-

Nanami climbed the sole staircase that remained intact slowly, staying aware of his surroundings in case the remaining curse decided to ambush him on his climb. His caution was thrown to the wind, however, when he heard a scream that he just knew was yours.

He barrelled at full speed towards where the scream came from, stopping only when he saw the large curse standing over your body, your leg bent at an unnatural angle, with its back to him.

"Oh fuck..." He mumbled, barely audible.

"NANAMI!" You shouted, panic evident on your face - you hadn't noticed him yet. "Nanami!" Your shout was quieter the second time, closer to a sob than a scream. As much as it killed him to see you in pain, to see you desperately calling for him, he stayed silent, the curse between the two of you distracted by you. I'm sorry, he thought, mentally apologising to you for using you as a pawn in his plan to exorcise this curse, but I'm here, and I won't let you die.

-

"He's gone." Satoru Gojo said simply as you walked back onto the grounds of Jujutsu Tech in a search for Shoko to patch up the wounds from the mission you're returning from.

"Wow, hello to you too, Gojo. Yeah, the mission went well, thanks for asking. A couple of scrapes, but I'm not too banged up." You rolled your eyes at Gojo's lack of greeting.

"Nanami. He's gone." It was as if your heart stopped.

"Gone? What do you mean he's gone? Dead?" You asked quietly, tears filling your eyes, fearing the worst.

"No, not dead." A sigh of relief, "but he's left Jujutsu. He's gone to be a salaryman at some fancy company."

"Yeah, funny joke, Gojo. Where is he actually?" You asked, rolling your eyes at his antics.

"No, he's actually left." His tone lacked the playfulness that normally always underlies it - he was being deadly serious.

"What?" You asked, confusion written all over your face/

"I'm sorry, he said he wanted nothing to do with sorcery anymore." You picked up what Gojo was implying - he wants nothing to do with me.

"That bastard." You mumbled.

"What was that?"

"That bastard." You spat, "how dare he. How dare he. He leaves, wanting nothing to do with us - with me - and doesn't have the balls to tell me himself? I have to hear it from you?"

"Woah, you're mad at Nanamin, not me!"

"Do not mention him in front of me again. If he wants nothing to do with me, that's fine. I want nothing to do with him, the coward."

-

All you could feel was fiery hot pain, sprawled on the floor, unable to even stand up, never mind run away from the curse in front of you. "Nanami! Help, please!" You screamed again and again, hoping your colleague might hear you.

"It's too dangerous for one sorcerer to go alone." Yaga's words rung through your ears. You mentally scolded yourself - why had you let your anger at Nanami cloud your judgement during an evidently dangerous mission? You had agreed to split up because you just wanted to get on with it, to get away from him, and get home as soon as you could. Why didn't you stop to just think? To strategize before running head first into a fight? This is how sorcerers die, you thought, this is how I die. Why did I never listen to Shoko as she explained reverse curse technique?

You tried to get away from the curse, using your arms to pull you across the floor, wincing every time your injured leg scraped across the floor, rubble digging into it. Eventually, your arms gave up, and you were ebbing in and out of consciousness. You stopped trying to move, curling your body into a small ball in an attempt to shrink away from the curse's line of sight. You let out a small, "Kento, please.." - a whimper more than any real form of speech - before passing out completely.

Nanami had heard every one of your cries as he fought the curse. You never once realised he was there - he put that up to a delirium that must have been brought on by the pain you had felt. This curse had at least ten times the power of the previous one he had thought, and fighting it without you was a challenge. After revealing his technique to increase its power, he eventually managed to get the upper hand - he managed to outwit it, trapping it under some rubble and exorcising it accordingly. He had no time to revel in his victory, though, as as soon as it started disappearing he was rushing to your side.

There's a pulse, thank God. Her leg is undoubtedly broken, probably in more places than one. She seems to have hurt her head too, but I can't tell if she has a concussion whilst she's unconscious. This is my fault - why did I suggest we split up? Yaga told us this was dangerous. I should've considered this outcome.

He called Ijichi, letting him know that both curses had been exorcised and that you had been badly injured, so he was to come and collect you both as soon as possible and take you straight to Ieri. Nanami gently put one arm underneath your neck, the other under your knees, being careful as to not grip the broken leg.

"I'm sorry." He whispered to your unconscious form, lifting you off the ground. You breathed in sharply, but didn't wake - at least you were somewhat responsive. He carried you down the stairs to the ground floor of the abandoned building as quickly as he could without jostling you too much, and placing you gently in the back of Ijichi's car. He got in after you, placing your head on his lap as you laid across the back seat. "Why did I let this happen to you?" He mumbled, moving a bloodied lock of your hair from your face.

"What was that? Did you say something, Nanami?" Ijichi asked, looking at him through the rear-view mirror.

"No. How long until we get back to the school?"

"About half an hour."

"Drive faster." His tone had no room for arguing, and Ijichi found himself starting to ignore the speed limits of the roads back to Jujutsu High.

-

You woke up in the white, sterile room that could only be the Infirmary at Jujutsu Tech.

"Good, you're awake. You scared us." Shoko said, standing over you.

"I make your life more interesting, what can I say?"

"Wow, you've been out for hours and you start cracking jokes. At least I know that head wound didn't do too much damage."

"Head wound?"

"You broke your left femur and fibula, and we think you hit your head on the way down."

"Is Nanami okay?"

"Why don't you ask him?"

"I'm not talking to him."

"He has been sat here since we arrived back." Another voice from across the room butt into your conversation with Shoko. You turned your head, and sure enough Nanami was sat there, the first few buttons of his shirt undone, having taken off his tie and suit jacket. His hair was now dry, but he hadn't restyled it, so it was still flat to his head. You couldn't see any injuries on him.

"I'm still not talking to you."

"Really? After I saved your life? After you were calling out to me to come and save you? You were certainly talking to me then."

"Fuck you."

"Nanami, leave." Shoko interrupted. "I'm not having her work herself up and undoing all my hard work." He sighed, but gave in and left the room. Your friend turned your attention back to you, "I've healed your injuries, but take it easy. Your leg is going to take some physio to get it back to where it was."

"So... I can go?"

"You want to get away from me so quickly? I'm hurt. But yeah, you can go. Although you need to take it easy for a week or so, alright? You were pretty banged up when Nanami brought you in."

"He brought me in?"

"Carried you in here himself. Refused to let anyone but me touch you."

"Oh."

"I didn't know he was back, did you?" She asked, eyeing you sceptically.

"Not until we got assigned this mission together."

"He's still into you, y'know."

"Fuck off, Sho."

"I'm being serious, I promise. You didn't see how worried he was when he arrived with you unconscious."

"I don't care. I hate him."

"You keep saying that, but I don't believe you. Never have. I know how much you cared about him. That doesn't go away overnight."

"It wasn't overnight, Sho. He was gone for two years." She hummed, but you know she wasn't agreeing with you. "I thought you were leaving?" she changed the subject.

"I am. I'll see you later." You hopped off your bed, stumbling a bit as you stood.

"I had better not see you in that state again any time soon!" Shoko called after you as you walked out of the infirmary.

"I'm a big girl, I can look after myself!" You called back, smiling slightly.

"How are you feeling?" At the sound of Nanami's voice, your small smile dropped.

"Have you been loitering outside of the Infirmary? Creep."

"I was waiting for you, because I was worried about you. That's not creepy, that's being a decent person."

"Fuck off. You know I'm not talking to you."

"So you keep saying. But why? Why won't you talk to me? Engage in a normal conversation like an adult?"

"Why? Are you actually asking me why I'm mad at you? You prick." You looked at him, gobsmacked. He didn't remember what happened? Or perhaps he remembered but didn't see the problem with it. The thought made your anger burn brighter.

“It has been two years since we last saw each other.”

“Oh I am well aware of how long it has been, Nanami.” You scoffed. He remained collected, and that just made you even more mad. Did he not care? The two of you had been so close before he left. Was he fine with throwing all of that away, with you spending the rest of your life despising him?

“Then why are you lording something I did - that I can’t even remember - over my head to the point that you will only speak to me if it is throwing obscenities my way?”

“It is not something you did.” You weren’t shouting anymore. Instead, your voice was quiet, but not calm. Pure fury coated every word, and you were practically spitting them out, “It was something you didn’t do.” You saw regret flash in Nanami’s face, and knew that he had finally figured out why you had been angry at him for so long.

“You left,” you carried on, “you left me here. Alone. And you know who I found out from? Satoru fucking Gojo. So not only did you leave, you left without telling me. WIthout talking to me about that decision. You were my best friend, I was in love with you, for fuck’s sake, and you left without having the balls to say goodbye. So yeah, I’m pissed. You knew what you were doing, and you still took the coward’s way out. Then you swan in here, in your fancy suit and your new hair acting like everything is hunky-fucking-dory. Well, it’s not.” Your voice cracked, anger dissipating into the sadness you never let yourself feel. “I have spent the past two years hating you, because it was easier than acknowledging how much I missed you. I was - am - so lonely and it was all your fault. Because you left. You left and you didn’t even tell me you were considering leaving. It was supposed to be us against the world. We were best friends, yet you didn’t care enough to say goodbye.” You turned on your heel, ready to walk away. You didn’t want him to see the tears threatening to fall down your cheeks, to see the broken heart he left you with written all over your face. You didn’t make it far though, because he grabbed your wrist.

He grabbed your wrist, spinning you around as he pulled you into his arms and kissed you. His lips were soft and warm, a stark contrast from his cold, reserved demeanour he had always worn. You melted into his embrace, and it felt so right, you were kissing Kento Nanami. You were kissing Kento Nanami - no. This was wrong. This was all wrong. You went rigid in his embrace, pulling away, shaking your head, tears running down your face.

“No. No. You don’t get to do this.” You took a few steps away from him, shaking your head vigorously. “You don’t get to kiss me and act like it solves everything. One kiss does not erase the hurt that I felt - that you caused. No. Get away from me.”

“Wait, please. Let me- let me explain myself. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. But please, listen to me. You can go on hating me afterwards, but I won’t ever be able to look at you again if I don’t explain.” You didn’t say anything, but didn’t walk away, either. He took it as a cue for him to continue.

“I hated Jujutsu society. I had to get away, to live outside of it for a while, but that was worse. Because you weren’t there. The only thing I had to think about was money, it was a miserable existence, so I came back. I didn’t know what I expected when I returned. But you were here, and even if you refused to speak to me, knowing that you were okay, that you were well and healthy, made my life infinitely better.”

“I don’t care that you left. I knew you hated it here. I care that you didn’t talk to me. You didn’t tell me that you wanted to leave, or even that you were leaving. It’s that you wanted nothing to do with me, so much so that you didn’t even have the common decency to say goodbye.”

“I couldn’t say goodbye to you,” you could hear the emotion in his voice, the vulnerability, “because I knew that if I did, I would have asked you to come with me. And I couldn’t do that to you.”

“If you had asked, I would have gone.”

“I know. But you thrive here, and I couldn’t drag you away from it and into a miserable life outside of sorcery.”

“I wouldn’t have been miserable. I would’ve had you.”

“You can have me now, if that’s what you want. I love you. I always have. I loved you before we were even friends, I was just too scared to even talk to you. Please, I love you. And I always will, even if you spend the rest of my life hating me.”

“No, you don’t. You can’t love me. Because you don’t know me. You love the person I was, the person you knew, and the person you think I am. We haven’t seen or even spoken to each other in two years, Nanami. We’ve grown up. We’ve changed. Neither of us are the person the other one thinks we are.”

“Then let me get to know you, please. We can start slow. Let me take you to dinner. We can start it like you would any other relationship. But I need to have you in my life.”

“Nanami, I-”

“Kento, please. You calling me by my last name isn’t right.”

“Kento, I don’t know. It’s so complicated, it will be so messy-”

“You are worth it, though. You loved me once - do you think you will be able to love me again?”

“I don’t know.” There was a beat of silence, “But I’m willing to try.” A smile lit up his face, one that reminded you of the days of your youth - the pure happiness he had always brought you. It gave you hope for your future, for your future together.

“Okay.” He said quietly, “are you free tonight?”

“Tonight? Eager, are we?”

“I have to make up for lost time, my dear.” You both looked at each other, tears staining your faces but wide smiles adorning them also.

“Tonight it is then. Pick me up at seven?”

“Five.”

“Five is too early, I need to get ready.”

“Six then.”

“Half past six.”

“Done.”

[singukieee]

—my all time favourite bts fics (pt. 1) ᯓᡣ𐭩

consists of my personal favourite bts fics that I've read countless of times. including those from other platforms, such as Wattpad, AO3, and Patreon.

For some works that are cross-posted between tumblr and wp/ao3, I'd only link them to the latters bcs I find it easier to read and navigate the stories on those. but I also tagged all the authors I know are here and linked the rest so you can check their blogs out yourself!

I'll also separate this list into several parts simply because there's too many... So it'd be easier for you guys to navigate!

red means unfinished

blue means finished

🗯️ editor's note

(sorted by alphabetical order)

A Place Called Home by @agustdakasuga

Having saved your own injured hybrid, you were determined to try and help any other hybrid that crossed your path who needed saving. But being a vet in a small hospital wasn’t enough for you. You wanted to do more, you wanted to make a difference. You wanted to give them a home.

Accidental Friends by Erakun06

Meet Bangtan, international superstars, the pride of South Korea, the love and hope in the dark of many lives, the role model and celebrity crush of so many people, and a group of people you often stumble across in your day to day life. You become acquaintances, slowly become friends, and- that's it. You are in a platonic friendship with Bangtan. Let me say it again. clears throat PLATONIC. Or One day, you meet a member of Bangtan, the next day, another, and another, and another, and one day, they become a group of people you often stumble across in your life. They become your acquaintances. Then your friends. Then your source of comfort, just like they are the source of comfort of millions of people in the world. What you didn't expect is that you become the same to them. It's inevitable. You are friends.

🗯️ a theme that I don't find much of, and this one was excecuted quite neatly I'd say

Ace For Hire by tokki-maknae

Who is Ace? Besides being the deadliest hitman on the market in the underground, whose really under the hood? The answers simple, well for you at least, because you are Ace. When you're not busy blurring yourself into the background noises of school, you were making a killing in the underground, both literally and figuratively. For years now Ace has become an infamous name among the other gangs and holds the reputation of being lethal and untouchable. But that all changes after a slip up that causes you to attract the unwanted attention of one persistent seven member gang. A gang that's been dying to know, who is Ace?

🗯️ badassss

At Your Service by @untaemedqueen

In which Yn is looking for an escort to accompany her to her nightmare ex and ex best friend's wedding, only to ended up falling in love with him.

Baby (you complete us) by @purpleyoonn

Soulmates were a common occurrence, so common, in fact, that the world sought an easier way to find your other half: A bracelet that would scan your mark and match you with those who shared your mark. Within recent years, soul groups were becoming normal, and your own bracelet said you have seven matches. Or where you wear your bracelet for ten years, and finally give up the hope you would find your soul group, only for BTS to put theirs on and see what they were missing.

Back Home by AlexLorchan / @alexlwrites

Secretly, he was selfishly hoping that you didn’t age well. Dealing with a small crush was easy enough when he was young and knew next to nothing about girls, when you were just a cute albeit slightly weird girl he had a soft spot for. But he wouldn’t know what to do with himself if his feelings came back with a vengeance while you were living together. God, he would probably lock himself with Jungkook until you went away. OR The one where, after living abroad for years, you move back to Korea and your old high school friend Namjoon offers you his place to stay while you get settled, casually forgetting to mention that: a) he still had a massive crush on you. b) he lived with six other guys.

🗯️ crack fic! my fave category and this one makes me giggle in both funny way and butterfly-in-my-stomach kinda way

Beauty of Love by @imnotlauriane

When you cross eyes with your soulmate, you get flashes of memories that have yet to happen. You can't see the same memory as the other and it can be either good or bad. It's not always terrible, but a thing is for sure. No matter what you do, it will happen. But are things always what they seem to be?

Between The Bloodshed series by @agustdakasuga

🗯️ this series... I just love. plot is super neat, relationship doesn't feel forced, etc etc

❶ Between The Bloodshed

Being a freelance doctor, this was just supposed to be any other job, helping a private client and taking care of him through his recovery. But you were not expecting to get caught in something so much darker that you would have to leave your life behind and build a new one.

❷ Everything Between Us

They left you hanging, they broke your heart. You didn’t get your happily ever after. But now they’re back and they’re searching for you to make things right. Could you look past the betrayal to take them back into your life and back into your heart?

Beyond The Stage by Alysheart

Alexis was going through the days simply. She was a college student in Florida, working towards her degree. When she scored tickets to the BTS concert in Korea, she didn't hesitate. She never expected to be soulmates with the seven idols.

Bound by Blood by PurpleQueenie

In a world where vampires and humans have to co-exist, where the line between tolerance and animosity blurs, how can you ever expect to get your happily ever after when your soulmates hate your very existence?

🗯️ love all the details, the slow burn, gosh just so good

Boyfriend For Hire by @remedyx

Unsatisfied with your life was an understatement. Being under the thumb of your father can have that effect. He wanted someone capable of running the company, but you wanted to pursue your passion. Countless unwanted blind dates and the threat of losing your freedom drives you to seek help from a group of individuals you'd least expected.

Breakthrough by Alphathyx

"My dreams haunt me like past memories that never existed" The Memory Dive, an invention that allows the user to dive into anyone's memories just from the collection of their DNA. Made by Professor Kim Seokjin, he created this device for the worlds secret service to solve mysteries that the ordinary field agents are unable to. With seven agents, ranging from ex military, to a university professor, college student and even a criminal, only these seven are able to use this machine to extract memories of others. They are also the only people that know how to escape it. Discover through their eyes of uncovering the darkest truths of the world, through the minds of victims.

🗯️ this one's super neat plot with complecated and technical world, just so good

Bright Colors and Loud Soulmates by Mostmouse

You resented soulmates, the whole damn concept. It just wasn't your thing, and you couldn't help but feel jealous of those who were born without soulmates, who could see the world as it was intended to be from birth. When you run into your soulmate, you're determined to stay in your own sphere of the world. Focusing on you. But, because nothing is simple in your life, it turns out he's one of seven - better yet, your seven soulmates are the globally famous band BTS. Because why wouldn't they be? OR you learn how to let your soulmates past your carefully crafted walls, and they’re more than happy to show you what a loving and supportive relationship should look like.

🗯️ a funny and cute one! (with extra h0rny characters lol)

BTS Office CEO AU by @jiminiesfavouritecolourisblue

You work for seven CEOs who have called you into their office due to a complaint

Can't Wait To See You Again by AlexLorchan / @alexlwrites

The one where Jungkook develops a huge crush on a Youtuber he found after falling into the rabbit hole of his recommended videos. Unbeknownst to him, you were also recommended to his hyungs. Unbeknownst to you, all across the world seven idols were slowly falling in love with you.

🗯️ I just love the concept of the boys being fanboys :3

Choco Bun by @nunchiimagines

When you moved to Korea after finishing college to continue pursuing latte art and baking, the last thing you were expecting was to open up your very own coffee shop under BTS Corp, Korea’s biggest entertainment service company for idols, models, singers, and more. Thanks to your hard work, creativity, and approachable personality you managed to become friendly with some pretty big named individuals as well as up and coming talent. As exciting and fun as it was for you, you slowly began to realize how much your 7 bosses weren’t particularly fond of this, acts of jealousy, pettiness, and aggression poking through in the most unsuspecting of ways. But what could 7 big named dragons want with a little foreign bunny?

Combined Beings by @numinousher

You are bullied on a constant because korea’s beauty standards do not fit girls on the heavier side. the bullying gets worse once a ceo is attracted to you and he mentioned you to the other 6.

Hybrids have been introduced into society for a handful of years now, the fighting for their rights is still happening but doesn't look promising. But when one girl finds a hybrid in danger she jumps at the chance to help, yet what she didn't know was how upside down her life was about to become. But a word of advice, not everything is as it seems.

🗯️ minus the bullying elements, this story is like a comforting sweet cloud

Comfort by http-lostforever

Could We Be Together Someday? series by BTS_Mommy / @babyboy-bangtan

🗯️ mann Idk what to write lol. this is another one that I've re-read thousand times, bcs some of the boys started as fanboys then became clingy friends. also yn's so supportive I just lovee.

❶ By Chance

A misunderstanding gone viral puts you on BTS's radar, which leads to a series of events that finally culminate with you meeting them for the first time.

❷ The Moments in Between

As you become close friends with BTS, you begin to realize that the feelings you have for them are slowly turning into something you're not ready to deal with. Unbeknownst to you, the same is happening to them.

Crave by sweetinsanityy

The boys don't do well with being controlled, but for their group, they'll bite their tongue and put on a smile for management. Yet when you, a new little rookie, stumble upon them, they're like a pack of hungry wolves. Or, the boys are all Doms and they want you to be their perfect little sub.

Cursed Fate by PurpleQueenie

The universe has designed soulmates- someone that completes you. But what happens when you don't have one but seven? And all you want to do is run in the opposite direction when you see them...

🗯️ queenie's stories are just so good, you should check them all out! this one also has such great details and writing.

Deep Down by sleepingbearandbunny

Jae, unlike everyone else, has nothing against the hybrid species. She likes being alone, where she is safe from ridicule and her controlling father. When a group of hybrids save her from some trouble, fate brings them together once more.

🗯️ a harsh and complecated world this one, so they went through a lot together and I love that!

PART 2 | PART 3 | PART 4 | NAVI

[erinwantstowrite]

Let me just quickly say, cross-overs can sometimes get REALLY difficult to map out and write in a cohesive way but you have absolutely NAILED IT!! I absolutely ADORE LoF!!! I usually don’t even bother reading fics with the ‘Richard Grayson is Richard Parker’ premise cause I felt like they were super confusing and overcomplicated but this fic?? SUPERB. ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE. OH MY GOD I ADORE IT. Everyone’s characterizations are so nice and wonderful aaaaaaah!!!! <33333

Ok ok I did actually have a question as well: would you be willing to share what your writing process looks like in terms of a chapter you’ve already posted? I was just wondering since I’m also currently working on my own fic (it’s been a few years but I managed to get fixated on an idea and it grew legs lol) and I’m currently fighting the organization of it haha.

How do you keep track of the plot points and/or foreshadowing you want to get a ‘lightbulb!’ moment for later? Do you have any tips?

Thank you so much! I absolutely adore your writing AND your art is so gorgeous omg it adds so much to the incredible story :DDD I hope you have a good day!!

I have a secret: I actually didn't like "Richard Grayson is Richard Parker' tag for a while for the same reason. Sometimes they felt like they missed the mark or it's just. A thing that's there? I almost didn't include it for LoF, but I'm glad I did because it changed the direction in such a big way.

Another secret: this made me incredibly happy because I have read so many wikis and scoured the internet to make sure that I had enough info on both fandoms so LoF could make sense to anyone who's reading it, whether they know Spider-Man, Batfam, or neither at all. Sometimes I worry a lot before I post that I'll miss a mark and will confuse people.

As for the question: I definitely am willing to share what my writing process looks like!

Be prepared for under the cut, I love to yap. It's in my blood to yap. And that's why it took a minute to get to this ask haha

(Spoilers for Leap of Faith!! Everything mentioned has already been published ((Chapters 1-11))

I had to go and find out which chapter I wanted to use as an example and I think we're gonna go with Chapter 5 for the most part :)

My writing process is, as described by alighterwood:

I think the description fits because while I'm all over the place, I have to be very detail oriented and I store everything in one spot.

Starting with the overall process, what I find is most helpful for me, when organizing, is having a notebook rather than doing it all digitally. I've been using a 70 sheet notebook that I had lying around waiting to be used, and as of yesterday, I officially filled the entire thing front to back. It's been an incredible help, for a lot of reasons, but mostly because it's a lot easier to remember something I physically wrote down than it is to remember something I typed. I'm now on to my second notebook for LoF, and I might even have to get a third.

In another ask, startupkat asked me this:

And I shared a little about my outline process there, but I'll try to go into a little more depth here. Emphasis on little because this is so long.

I write a truly insane amount of outlines in this notebook.

This is just what I can show you, but a good chunk of the notebook is just outlines. Over and over and over again. That's because they're always changing/adapting based on so many different factors. Sometimes I get to a chapter I thought I had fully planned out and then realize it just doesn't work anymore. Other times, I get to the chapter and realize I don't want to write that anymore/isn't as interesting as I thought it would be. A few times I got halfway through a POV of a scene I was struggling on and decided to switch POV's, which will change up the outline for a chapter every now and then.

Which is why I don't write incredibly detailed outlines and try to keep it vague until I actually get to that chapter. It's a lot less daunting to rewrite a chapter outline than it is to rewrite the entire outline.

Fic outlines and Chapter outlines look a lot alike.

This is what I said in the other ask, but I didn't elaborate on it all the way.

I make a list just like that, and then I try to put it in chronological order/in an order that makes sense. I keep the Fic outline vague by writing down "Goals" for a chapter rather than scenes. But I also keep notes to myself if I really think something is important. The more important I think a scene needs to be, the more details I write down to make sure my future self recalls what I had in mind when I thought it up.

Really simple example:

Chap 1 Goal: Peter gets to Gotham and meets Babs while running around. Meet Nightwing too? Get shelter.

Chapter 2 Goal: Bats are like "???" about Peter. Batfam dynamic important... Peter stalking Batfam back? Peter meet Batman >:)

When I get to a chapter, that's when I make a far more detailed list of wants/needs/goals. It's the Step 2 from the Step 1. Here are some examples from Chapter 5:

Needed to have:

More POV's from universe 1299 (Peter's home universe)

Tony's POV more specifically, how he's doing/feeling, what he's figured out

What they've figured out on 1299 side vs what's going on in 1300 (Gotham)

Explaining more about Peter's trauma/his past

Dick learning more about Peter, and vise versa

Wanted to have:

Ned being a more central character

Natasha :)

Loki being a little shit

Tony and Cap bickering

Peter talking to Nightwing again

The last name Grayson

Gymnastics!!

(This is the shortened list, because the chapters are so long)

When I looked at this list before writing my outline, I had to figure out how I could incorporate everything. If I needed more 1299 POV's, and I wanted Ned, Natasha, and Loki, there's one scene accounted for. I had to get their side of things and wanted that trio together. I needed a Tony POV, and I wanted Tony and Cap bickering, so those went together, plus I got 1299's POV of Ohnn and his plans explained.

I needed to have Peter explaining more about his trauma, and Dick and Peter to talk/get closer. I wanted a Nightwing POV, to have Peter say his last name, and them doing gymnastics. I knew Peter wouldn't willingly talk about that, so I had him have a nightmare. Not only did it give readers perspective but it made Peter more susceptible to talking to Nightwing because he was more emotionally vulnerable/lonely, and that's how that scene came together.

That's when I would write down the chronological order of these events by writing out "Scene Blocks." (This is what I wrote down but my handwriting was so bad I can't subject y'all to it):

scene 1- Ned talking to Loki. Natasha should be nearby and observing Loki's behavior. They are not on friendly terms. Ned is more worried about Peter than he is as to what Loki could be up to, so Natasha takes on that role.

scene 2- Tony is freaking out about Peter being in an alt dimension. He should attack Ohnn when he's not prepared for it. Beat his ass? Beat his ass. Cap there too.

scene 3- Peter's nightmare. "Ben, where do you go when you die?" "Where do you think?" "With you. Where you went."

scene 4- Nightwing and Peter.

Of course, things come to attention when writing. Like originally, Tony and Cap were arguing in the Tower. But it was a little too much like his and Natasha's argument, and I kept in mind that Tony is smart. Sometimes I forget that the characters are smarter than I am, so I have to account for what they would figure out. So Tony would have picked up the puzzle pieces and come to more conclusions than I originally thought about, and I figured he'd be way more proactive about it than just. Being in the Tower and waiting.

Which means that that scene ended up being as listed above: having a squabble with Cap, learning more about Peter's dynamic with the Avengers in this universe, and seeing how Tony is reacting to it by throwing himself head first into trying to capture Ohnn.

I'll realize I need something else to be mentioned or put in and I'll have to shimmy things around, but that's basically how it goes.

As for other forms of organization:

Keeping a timeline is so important because it tells you a lot about the environment your characters are in. It's also important to remember what a character has on them, what money they've spent, who they've met/who you have mentioned, every alias that is being used, to read your work and write down edits you want to make before you make them, to write down ideas beforehand of situations you can use, and, most importantly: MAKE A MAP!! This has saved me so many times. Sometimes your brain WILL trick you or make it harder on you to envision a scene. Make a map of where your characters are physically!! It will save you too!!

As for foreshadowing and plot points, I'll let you in on yet another secret:

Your subconscious is doing a lot more than you think it is.

Sometimes when I foreshadow something, I didn't even know I was until I got to it. I very often go back to read chapters that came before this to see what I've mentioned and what I haven't, and when I do, I'll see something and go "I have to bring this back" or "I almost forgot about that!"

Other times, I am very aware of what I'm foreshadowing, and that's because I follow a mystery plot formula. You have to keep in mind everyone's intentions, all the time. How are they feeling? What are their motivations? And: what are they doing right now, while this character is doing this?

Like Beck and Ohnn. From the very beginning, I knew I had to make sure that it was obvious Ohnn wasn't working alone. From there, I had to weave through the story and slowly build him up as someone who's working behind the scenes. Even from Ned's first POV, I made sure to mention that this person knows Tony and is tech savvy.

My biggest tip is to make sure you reread your work or at least skip through it, because sometimes you don't even know that you placed something there.

And sometimes, it's very purposeful. :)

I hope this helped! I really tried to keep it short but I am insane and the process is sooooo long. It sounds complicated but it really is simple when you're actually doing it I swear

[vampire-exgirlfriend]

You guys, what the fuck is up with the increase in stealing and plagiarising in this fandom lately? When did that become a thing that was okay to do?

The first time I was flat out plagiarized was almost four years ago in a different fandom. A well known author in that fandom took the first paragraph of a short one shot, one of the first things I’d ever posted and that I was incredibly proud of, switched a few words, and then used it as the summary for their slightly longer fic. They then went on to steal the premise of my ficlet and just…make it longer. This was brought up in a discord server a friend of mine was in that I wasn’t and the general consensus was “who would believe you? You’re nobody.” So I kept my mouth shut and I deleted my fic because seeing it made me feel like shit. Something similar then happened to a friend of mine with the titles of her fics being stolen, flat out and word for word, for the same characters. And again it was “no one will believe you.”

We shut up. We stuck it out. And then when it kept happening, to us and to others, we left that fandom.

I was so, so excited when HotD aired. I was back in my ASOIAF phase that had never actually ended. It was a new opportunity to make friends with common interests and my writing improved so much because of how passionate about the canon material I was. I have made some of the most incredible friends, like life-long, stay up all night talking, come to my house or let’s hang out when you’re in my state/country kind of friends. It’s pretty amazing. But this fandom is a whole different beast than any other I’ve been involved with. I have no idea if it’s the general age of the fandom, or the lack of prior fandom experience, or what us old people call the “tiktokifcation of fandom.” But it’s different. And while that’s usually a good thing, there are so many times when this has been awful. There is a huge lack of accountability here. People are stealing things. And the weirdest part is, they don’t care! It is plagiarism to have someone else's story opened while you write yours so that you can tone match the other writer. It is plagiarism to take people’s well thought out ideas and then use them beat for beat. I get it, it’s fic, nothing is wholly original, we are going to see idea recycling! That’s just fandom. But to model your entire story off of someone else’s is heinous. And it’s wrong. And this literally just happened to a very good friend of mine. When she mentioned she was uncomfortable with it and had blocked the person who did this, someone she considered a level headed mutual (who has recently admitted to plagiarising someone else themselves, mind you) told her that she was just drama baiting and didn’t have the right to be upset. The same thing happened to me with a now deleted creator who told me that she dragged me in her discord server and that her friends (all big name creators would essentially “black list me” for saying anything).

It’s not dramatic to not be okay with your work being stolen! This is a normal fucking reaction. In trad publishing or academia, this shit gets you banned, expelled, etc. It can ruin your life.

I received a slew of anons recently asking for help with graphic making and editing. And I was so excited about them. That shit is fun for me. We chatted for a while, with them on anon, and that was that. Until I got an anon letting me know that the person I was talking with was someone who had stolen ideas and storylines from me and other creators. So I looked, I asked friends to look, and the consensus was “yeah, this is fucking plagiarism, and it’s weird.” All of the edit stuff she’d asked about was used on an edit that was a direct rip off of my own. But I elected to not make a thing of it, to ignore it, to wash my hands of it because of the weird fucking trend of calling out theivery being labeled as drama baiting. And I didn’t want that, not after I had genuinely made the mistake of thinking that someone had stolen an idea from me when they hadn’t (calm down, we’re really close friends now). This person deleted their old blog and so I thought it was over. And then yesterday I got a dm from this new blog I didn’t even know existed accusing me of sending them harassing anons.

A blog, who had stolen from me and at least four other people, who had reached out to me on anon for help and ideas, that at this point I didn’t even know existed anymore, said they knew I was sending hateful anons accusing them of theft. I wasn’t, of course, because I had no idea they even existed, and it made no sense that I would even know they’d created another blog. I only found out about their new blog when they dm’d me from it. But they had obviously done this to enough people that they were now getting called out on it.

You guys, we have to fucking stop acting like this. This fandom needs to stop stealing from each other and eating our own. And if someone brings up that they’ve had an idea stolen, we need to take them seriously instead of insinuating they’re only attempting to cause drama. Stop sending people unhinged anons because you feel like you’re guilty of lifting from another creator and just work on creating something original. Writing is hard. Giffing and making edits is fucking hard. And no, nothing will ever be 100% original, that’s just impossible at this point, but stop fucking taking things that aren’t yours and claming them as your own. Do better. Grow up.

[gyubeom]

You are the love of my life

…………………………………………….

Pairing: Boss!Huening Kai x Office Worker!Reader

Genre: smut and some fluff

Warnings: Reader is a female, use of the pet names (babe, baby, hon), use of the word slut, loss of virginity, drinking, fingering, clit stimulation, nipple sucking

a/n: Hi guys Im back with another fic, I have been wanting to write for Huening Kai so thank you for requesting this! Anyways enjoy!

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You’ve been going to the same company for a year now. In that year, you hate to admit but you developed a crush for your boss, Kai. You never knew how you fell for him. He was cold and distant to you, not to mention he would give you loads of work for you to do. Until one day, at a Christmas party, that would all change.

You were on your way to the designated place for the Christmas party. You brought some wine and cheese for the charcuterie board. When you arrived, you were greeted by your best friend/colleague Soobin. “Hi Y/n, glad you can be here!” he said with his dimple smile. You smiled back “Yeah, good thing boss didn’t drown me with work today” you said rolling your eyes.

Soobin chuckled “Yeah right, anyways get a few drinks and loosen up, who knows somebody might take your virginity tonight”. You choked on air at his remark “What the fuck Soobin!” You said playfully slapping him. “Just saying” he said raising his hands in the air while walking away.

You decided to drop off the wine and cheese on the food table. After that you joined a few colleagues in a table. “Hey Y/n glad you can make it” one of your colleagues said. “Yeah of course” you said back “have a few drinks” he said while handing you a drink. You took it and downed it without hesitation.

After many more drink you were wasted. “Woah Y/n what happened to you, you look so drunk right now” Soobin said laughing slightly. “Wha-Whatever Soobs” you said while walking away from him. You decided to go to the food table to get something to eat.

When you arrived, you decided to eat a few crackers. “Hey Y/n how’s the party” your boss Huening Kai said while sipping his drink. “Ugh here comes Mr. Cold shoulder, you know I almost missed this party because of the amount of work you gave me yesterday” you said while waving your half eaten cracker to his face.

You don’t know if it was the alcohol or your vision but you swore you saw him smiling at you. He never smiled at you, ever, so it was a surprise that he did now. “Y/n you’re really drunk, how are you supposed to get home? You can’t drink and drive” he said worriedly.

“As if you cared about me ever Mr. Cold shoulder” you said while rolling your eyes and looking away. He put down his drink and without a warning carried you outside. “Hey put me down!” You said while squirming “Nope, you’re not going home by yourself” he said while placing you gently in the car.

The both of you drove to his house, it was a silent car ride. Not long after you pulled up to his driveway, Kai got out of his car to open your door. When you got out, you suddenly burst out “You don’t even care for me! You hate me! Why did you even worry about me earlier! All you do is tire me all day! Can’t you see that I love you-“ you were cut out by a kiss.

You were in shock at first but melted into the kiss. You let your hands wander around his body while his did to yours too. You pulled away and unlocked the door quickly while capturing his lips in a kiss. He then pulled away, "When did I say I hated you or never cared about you" he started "I love you too Y/n, I'm sorry if I never got to express that properly-". You cut him off with a kiss.

This time the kiss was rough and hurried. You were both hungry for the same thing as you went to his bedroom without breaking the kiss. You then pulled away and looked at him with a worried look. “Um, I forgot to tell you, but this is my first time having you know” you said while looking down at your feet.

He then hooked his fingers under your chin which made you look at him. “Are you okay with this? I mean if you are I’ll be careful” he said reassuringly. You smiled, “Yes, I’m okay with it”. Thats all it took for him to start kissing you again.

Without breaking the kiss he pushed you to the bed. He pulled away and started leaving love bites on your neck. He then tugged at your blouse “Can I?” he asked while looking up at you with hungry eyes. You blushed at the thought of somebody aside from yourself seeing you naked. You nodded as he started to unbutton it.

Your blouse was then tossed somewhere in the room. He then stared at your breasts which made you squirm from embarrassment. He then looked up and smirked at you before leaving hickeys on the valley of your breasts.

He then raised your back slightly and reached down to your bra clasp. “Can I” he whispered into your ear darkly. You nodded shyly as he unclasps your bra and tosses it along with your blouse. He then pulls away and takes a look at you then smirks.

He then loosens his tie and unbuttons half of his button up. You couldn’t take your eyes off of him, your eyes started to wander around his body. From the half unbuttoned button up, to his chest slightly peeking out, the tie loosely hanging around his neck.

“Take a picture it’ll last longer hon” he said while smirking. You blushed and looked away in embarrassment. But you suddenly let out a loud moan when Huening Kai started to suck your hard nipples. You reached to grip the sheets while you let out lewd moans.

Once he finished, he started unbuttoning the rest of his shirt. He tossed it aside before he started to remove his tie. Before he could you stopped him, “Wait” you said in a hurry. He halted his movements to look at you curiously “don’t remove your tie, I-I like it” you said shyly closing your legs.

He smirked before leaning to whisper in your ear “Yeah? You like that slut”. You felt your blood rush to your cheeks as he pulled away. You felt shy and tried to cover yourself with your hands as he removed his pants.

Kai noticed this and grabbed your hands gently and pulled them away from your body. “Don’t hide your beautiful body babe” he said while pinning your hands up. Your heart melted at his remark, you then felt a tug on the waist band of your slacks.

You looked down to him gesturing to remove your pants. You nodded as he unbuttoned it and removed it along with your soaked underwear. “Woah, you’re so fucking wet” he said while running a finger up your slit.

You felt yourself getting wetter and wetter each stroke of his finger. The more you yearned to have him buried deep inside you. “You want something baby” he said while looking at you. “I-I want you to finger me already” you said softly.

Huening Kai smirked at you before pounding two fingers into your dripping entrance. You heard the squelching sound of your wetness as he pumped his two fingers in and out of your hole. You moaned with pleasure.

“You like that baby” he said in between your moans. “Mhmm-yeah fe-feels so g-good” you said while grinding on his fingers. You then screamed his name when he started licking your clit. It made your fingers run through his hair in satisfaction.

He then started to flick his tongue on your clit making you reach your high sooner than you thought. “Ka-Kai I think I-I'm gonna cum” you said. With that, he added a third finger making you moan at the stretch. He then increased his speed of his fingers.

After a few more fast pumps, you were cumming all over his fingers, some getting on the bed sheet. Your pussy was drenched in a mixture of your wetness and cum. Without a warning Kai licked your slit, cleaning it up. You flinched a bit at the sudden action before relaxing yourself again.

He then stood up and removed his boxers and positioned himself on top of you, caging you in his arms. “Ready?” he asked while looking in your eyes seductively. “Y-yes” you said while nodding eagerly.

He gathered your wetness and spread it all over your pussy. He then prodded his tip on your entrance and slide in slowly. You felt some cum spill out of your core making you moan.

The delicious stretch of your entrance made your head lean back on the pillow under you. “You okay?” Kai asked, “Yes, its j-just that you’re kinda big” you said in between moans.

He smirked “Yeah? You like that baby?” he said teasingly. “Mhm-“ you were cut off by letting out a loud moan when he bottomed out. He then pulled out and slammed his dick into you again. You moaned “Oh fuck! K-Kai that feels so good!” you said in pleasure.

Upon hearing this, he increased his speed. You could feel his cock hitting the back of your pussy as he fucked you hard. You shot your hands up to grip his upper arm, leaving scratches each thrust.

You then felt the weight of his left arm leave your side, it trailing down to your core. He then rubbed your clit in fast circles making you scream his name. You dug your nails into his biceps as he thrusted harder into you.

He then leaned in and started leaving more hickeys on the side of your neck down to you collarbones. He then took a look at you, looking at the trail of beautiful hickeys he left on your gorgeous body. "You're so pretty babe" he said in awe.

You blushed at his remark as you tried to look away. You felt his fingers hook under your chin which forced you took look at him. You locked eyes with him before he slammed his lips to yours. He kissed you passionately, filled with love.

He pulled away and changed your position. Now, you're laying on your stomach with your hips raised and spread. Your face is buried in the pillows underneath you.

Even if the pillows are there, it wasn't enough to muffle your loud moans as Kai fucked his cock hard into you. Not long after you felt another orgasm nearing. When you couldn't hold it much longer, you cummed on Kai's cock. Moaning as you did. Kai's orgasm followed not long after yours did. His hot white liquid filling you up.

He pulled out and layed down on the spot beside you. After the two of you calmed down, he took you in him arms and spooned you. You looked up at him as he removed the stary hairs covering your face.

"How was it?" he said smiling, you were in awe. You never knew his smile would be so warm, it made you feel like you were the only girl in the world. "It was nice" you said smiling back at him.

"Glad to know that" he said while chuckling. He used his free hand to direct your head into his chest. He kissed the top of your head as he soothingly stroked your head. You soon felt sleepy and nuzzled your head into his chest before drifting to sleep.

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a/n: Hi guys I hope you enjoyed! Thank you again for requesting this and thank you for reading!

[lyrakanefanaticwriting]

sweet nothings - a grayson x lyra fic

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Grayson collapsed on the secluded hallway floor, gasping and panting like a dog as memories of Emily overtook him and whispered poisonous affirmations in his ear. It was all too much. It hadn’t been this bad in almost a year, but today was different. Today was October 18th. Averys birthday— and Emily’s death date. He felt every bit of control slipping out of his grasp, as Emily wrapped her arms around him. This is your fault, she whispered in a voice that would have been comforting if not for the words she was uttering. As soon as he saw memories of her crowding up his mind and blurring his vision, he escaped the party and went to the most secluded hallway in Hawthorne House, so nobody could find him. Tears started crowding his eyes as he grabbed his tie and attempted to loosen it, budge it, do anything to stop the laboured breaths from coming. Emily continued whispering, no, taunting, Grayson. Grayson, she whispered. Grayson. She continued whispering his name, each one getting louder, before he heard one last loud voice, one that wasn’t Emily’s, saying his name.

“Grayson.” A non taunting and tranquilizing voice said. Grayson looked up from his place on the ground. It was Lyra Kane, one of the contestants. She was looking down at him with wide eyes, and her lips were parted with shock and confusion. He felt an overcoming relief, and at the same time, level of distraught, that she was there. The second Grayson’s breathing starts to slow at the sight of her and his heart warms, Emily takes over. She whispers horrid words, and warns him away from Lyra, but he tries his best to push her down. For now.

“Grayson, are you okay?” She asks him, crouching down to be at his eye level. He coughs and shudders, so overwhelmed with relief that Emily had finally gone away, that he had completely forgotten about the fact that Lyra was seeing this. Seeing him, raw and horrible and trying to fight off past memories that still haunted him.

“I-I’m so sorry,” He said, still turned away, and too ashamed to look her in the eye. “You shouldn’t see this. You can leave.” Lyra made no sign of leaving, and instead, took his hand. Grayson is immediately brought back to Emily, and shudders with all her memories flooding his brain. He squeezed his eyes shut, not able to drown out the voices. Emily’s. Emily’s. Emily’s. Emily’s. And then, a new voice, warm, and strong, and soothing. Lyra’s.

“I can’t remember a lot from when I was a kid. Only some memories. But one thing that I will never be able to forget, that I remembered from start to finish, is when my father killed himself.” She says, her voice soft. Although the voices were still there, they dulled the slightest bit, and Grayson wondered if she was showing him her scars as an attempt to distract him from his own. But it was working. Emily receded slightly. Grayson was suddenly focused on the sound of her honey rich voice, and not the whispers still echoing through his head.

“I remember what happened before, and what happened then, but I tend to forget what happened afterwards. A lot of it’s a blur. And the truth is, it didn’t hit me that hard. Not at first. It’s only afterwards that grief started wearing down on me, harder and harder. I had my stepdad, but as I got older, Father’s Day became a more prominent reminder of his death. I used to avoid making Father’s Day Cards as a kid, cause trouble to get sent to the office, do anything, just so I could avoid the whole day. I never knew why before. I thought that I was just a horrible child who liked being rebellious on Father’s Day, but god, it was so much more than that. And not to mention my birthday.” Lyra said, laughing dryly as her eyes creased with sadness. Grayson stared into them, forgetting Emily’s whispers and focusing on the sparks in her deep brown eyes. It was insane, really, how she could save him from drowning, her voice an anchor that he could grab onto and never let go. She looked up at him, and Grayson suddenly felt steady and afloat.

“My father had shot himself on my birthday. From the ages 5-11, it never really crossed my mind, but the years after that, it hit me harder and harder. That excitement when I went to blow out the candles became replaced with a dreadful reminder of that fateful night all over again, and I would end every birthday crying myself to sleep. Every reminder of him stuck to my skin, and refused to let go. Every birthday became more of a reluctant celebration than one I was actually looking forward to,” She looked down again, suddenly becoming awkward and tracing her fingers on the hardwood floor. “To this day, I haven’t celebrated my birthday in years. It’s too difficult.” Grayson stopped to think, mulling over what she had said with a frown. Then, he remembered his panic attack from a mere few moments ago, and how she had saved him from the same memories that she still experiences to this day. Her voice was a river that carried him out to sea, and Grayson realized now that she had successfully managed to make Emily almost recede completely. He also realized, with a jolt, that her hand was still on his, and he suddenly held on tighter, squeezing. Lyra blinked out of her trance and stared down at their hands, her lips parting. Then, she suddenly squeezed her eyes shut and brought them back up to Grayson’s. She scooted closer on the hardwood floor, making Grayson heart pound in his chest, as she gazed up at him.

“What about you, Grayson? What happened?” She asked him. Grayson realized suddenly that Lyra had called her Grayson. Not Mr. Hawthorne, or Game Master, like she had been doing so far in The Game, but Grayson. He stared into her eyes, a sudden calm overtaking him, and forgot about Emily’s whispers. All he could feel right now was the warmth of Lyra’s hand in his, and his racing heart. As well as the fact that, although he tends to push people away, he couldn’t help but think, what if I bring her closer?

“I know grief too. Not just with my grandfather but also with… a girl I once knew.” Grayson paused there, watching Lyra for her reaction. He wasn’t sure why. Lyra didn’t give much of one, but her eyebrows did raise slightly, and she straightened the slightest bit. “Her name was Emily. I wish that I could say that she was just a normal girl, that she didn’t hurt me, but she did. She played games with me. She put me on a pedestal some days, and then acted like I was garbage others. Yet the only thing that I’m ashamed about is that I let that happen.” He finished, inhaling sharply. Her eyebrows creased, and she gazed up at him with a look that almost seemed as if she was seeing something familiar. From this close, Grayson noticed things about her that he hadn’t before. Like the way her brows furrowed when she was thinking, and how full of thought her eyes were.

“But I can’t say all memories of her were bad. There are some things that I could never forget, like those summer nights where we would invent games to play outdoors, or those times that we would have strawberries in the treehouse and just talk.” Grayson added quietly, thinking back to those days. Lyra frowned.

“But now that she’s gone..” Grayson said, trailing off. Lyra finally met his gaze, and spoke like she was speaking from experience.

“Summer nights are colder, and strawberries are less sweet.” Lyra finished for him, familiarity and guilt clear in her eyes. Grayson blinked at her with surprise, and nodded. She nodded back and expelled a breath, closing her eyes for only a moment before speaking.

“Those things aren’t your fault, Grayson. We can’t help how others affect us at times.” She said, looking up as if telling a familiar tale. Then, she turned back to him with a smile. “You know, I always knew you had that solemn streak in you, Hawthorne, but I never knew it ran that deep.” Grayson’s lips lifted by a hair, and he exhaled slowly. Finally, Grayson thought with a smile, Here comes the familiar quips and comments from her.

“Yes, well, you don’t get that monotonous on purpose.” Grayson retorted, in deadpan. Lyra blew out a laugh and her smile grew, and even Grayson was wearing one now. His hand was still holding hers, and the sudden realization of her warmth washed over him all over again. Their eyes drew towards each others again, a clash of blue on brown, and they stayed like that, close together, hand in hand, for a few moments more. Whispers echoed through his brain of the past panic attack, threats and attempts of guilt tripping from Emily, but Grayson ignored them all. Instead, he listened to his heart, and what that was saying. Without thinking, Grayson suddenly drew Lyra closer, wrapping his free hand around her lower back. Lyra seemed taken by surprise for a moment, before she raised her head, meeting his gaze. Her eyes flickered from his left to his right, before they landed on his lips.

“We really are something, huh?” She said with a snort, quickly flickering her eyes back on his and smiling to cover up her slip-up. He held her gaze, need and desire and all of these new, unexpected feelings crowding his head, before moving closer. Lyra moved with him, and all of a sudden, their lips were on each others. Her hand let go of his to wrap around the back of his neck, and Grayson abandoned all thought. He wasn’t thinking of Emily, or her hateful words, instead, all he could think about was how soft her lips were. His heart pounded in his chest as the kiss drew on, until finally, they separated. Lyra gazed up at him, an awkward and shocked look on her face, before resting her head on his shoulder. In a few minutes, they would have to get back to the party. In a few minutes, they would have to separate. But at that moment, all Grayson wanted to do was soak in the moment, as well as the sound of her heartbeat so in tune with his, and reminisce on when the next one would arrive.

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YES YES I KNOW I HAVE REQUESTS IN MY INBOX AND DRAFTS BUT I HAD THIS IDEA AND HAD TO WRITE IT RIGHT AWAY BC I LOVE THEM 💗💗💗

[smilocity]

His Goddess - Rodolfo Parra x VargasFemReader

Note: This is from my old account! (I will be reuploading them all to this account!) WARNING! This is my first time writing about military action, and war with battlegrounds/warfare. So bear with me...

Parring= Rodolfo Parra x VargasFem!reader

Genre= Fluff! Romance♡

Additional stuff to warn about= Guns, wounds, swears(mostly in Spanish), warfare, military action, etc.

And to add, I am not Mexican so I'm gonna have to use some poor translator for some sentences i'll be writing in the fic. (Apologies to all the Spanish speakers out there....)

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You are Alejandro Vargas' younger sister by 4 years, and by what Las Almas sees, you're like his little princess he doesn't want to see sad nor hurt. Hell, even his men are scared of your brother. Once, a new recruit for the Los Vaqueros thought you were a good choice to flirt with...Let's just say he was bedridden for about 4 days...

You met Rudy at the same time you joined the Los Vaqueros so you both clicked and just sailed away happily. Alejandro was relieved of you being quite attached to someone like Rudy as he is the only man he completely trusts aside from you and even called him his brother in all but blood.

Your occupation is being a combat medic and head of the medical department of the Los Vaqueros.

"Hermana. (Sister.) Rudy and I with some of our men are meeting up with Sergeant Mactavish and their Lieutenant of TF 141 to help for the El Si Nombre and Hassan problema." Your brother arrived in your office as you just finished taking care of 10 patients and their paperwork.

"¿Ah, de verdad? (Oh, really?) Interesante(interesting), Alejandro. But you do know the problem in Las Almas is bigger for only four soldiers, hm?" You reclined in your chair.

The leader of the Los Vaqueros only smirked, "You underestimate my allies, flor(flower). Rudy will be driving if you want to come along." Your brother left before you could even get a say in making you huff.

~~~

Rudy was already in the black van ready to go as he saw his superior and his sister.

Seeing you just made Rudy's day or even week, "No me digas. (Don't tell me.) ¿Te animó a unirte?" (He egged you on to join?)

"Mhm. Used you to bribe me. Puta. (Bitch)" you mumbled making both males chuckle.

"Ah, Rudy? ¿Estás bien para moverte? (Are you okay to move?) You took quite a beating when chasing Hassan a few days earlier. Estoy preocupada. (I'm worried.)" You gave the second in command a soft look making him smile delicately towards you.

"I'm fine, Angel. (That's your codename btw!) I've been through worse."

"Ahora, ahora tortolitos. Tendrás tiempo para coquetear más tarde." (Now, now lovebirds. You'll have time to flirt later.)

Both you and Rudy only slightly eye rolled at Alejandro's teasing and started to head to the meet up spot for the new allies.

When arriving, you were cut short with some problems since some new recruits caught themselves in strife, "Doc, dos cadetes se lesionaron durante una sesión De entrenamiento." (two cadets were injured during a training session.) Spoke up a Los Vaqueros when you arrived to the base making you sigh sharply, "Oh Dios mío...(Oh my god...) Looks like I'm held back again."

Alejandro and Rudy nodded, "We'll meet the Sergeant and Lieutenant for you, hermana. (sister)

Before leaving, you and Rudy did a secret handshake (It was basically you both giving each other a high-five from side to side then you guys doing a cross over your chests before doing a fist bump.)

"See you soon!" You bid goodbye to Rodolfo as you gave a nod to Alejandro.

"Nos vemos Ángel. (See you Angel.)" Smiled Rudy before getting a pat on the shoulder by his colonel as they left.

~~~

To cut it short, the Vaqueros(as) with the addition of Srg Mactavish and Lt Ghost haven't found El Sin Nombre making you get ticked off but radio to your brother that you will find him yourself if you have to.

"(Y/N) is it?"

You heard your radio working making you pause but answer, "Yes. Who is this?"

"Kate Laswell at your service ma'am. I heard you're the 3rd in command of the Vaqueros with Alejandro. I'm here to help you find El Sin Nombre. I'm with TF 141 consisting of Sergeant-" You cut her off,

"Mactavish and Lieutenant Ghost. I have heard quite a lot beforehand." You heard a hum for an answer.

"I have now understood that. I just sent you some information I have gathered from the boys on their recent search of El Sin Nombre. If you can, I'd love to see if you can find this person with my help."

You smirked, "Of course. Let's get to work Laswell."

After doing some digging with Kate, you both found out the Cartel had a house for a base in the far part of Las Almas.

"Thanks for the help Vargas."

"No problem Kate. I'll tell the boys and we'll be off with your orders." You said to her as you got the papers you used for information while talking with your radio.

"See you soon." That was the last message you've heard of her before the mission.

While getting out all the Vaqueros bowed to you in respect as you walked towards the part of the base where your brother is. (It was made mandatory they had to since Alejandro wants everyone to respect you like they respect him.)

Of course they were outside so they could be quickly briefed for the mission.

"Didn't know the Mexican Special Forces had a beautiful lady like you walking around." Said an unfamiliar person as you turned to see a soldier with short blonde locs and a smirk on his face.

'He's American...Must be with the Sergeant and Lieutenant.' You thought.

"There are many things you don't know about Las Almas." You replied ignoring the whole him hitting on you bit.

"Well then, let me at least get to know you better." Urged the man as he walked closer to you.

"¡Esa es mi hermana idiota!" (That's my sister dipshit!)

You both turned to see Alejandro speed power walking to get to you and the soldier.

"Detente ahora, Vargas. No lo sabía, eso es todo." (Basta ahora, Vargas. Él no lo sabía, eso es todo.) You held a hand to the colonel's chest to stop him from hurting the oblivious guy.

"What now?" As you said before, the blonde male was confused as hell since you both spoke Spanish and not English.

"Please excuse the Colonel. He gets...protective of me. Ale. Move." You apologized on behalf of your brother before ordering him to get a move on so you can be introduced to the rest of the men, the said Colonel moved on your order.

"Whoa! I didn't know there was someone who can order Alejandro around like that." Said a surprisingly Scottish voice near Rodolfo and Lieutenant Ghost.

"She's the only one who can." Added Rudy as he smiled when you approached them.

"Men, meet the head of the medical department in the Mexican Special Forces. (Y/N). Codename: Angel." Introduced Alejandro as you smiled and nodded to the men.

"It is nice to meet you all. I was supposed to meet you beforehand when you landed but some idiotas(idiots) decided to hurt themselves while training." You joked as you shook the Scottish male's hand.

"Sergeant John Mactavish. Nice to meet you. Call me Soap." Smiled the man, as you nodded.

"Ghost." Simply replied the Lieutenant making you nod.

"Philip Graves. Head of the Shadow Company. At your service ma'am." The man that talked to you before smiled at you. Alejandro gives a short glare, making you do the same to him, making him stop.

"Alejandro." You warned.

"Sí, sí flor. (Yes, yes flower.) Got information for us?" Asked the Colonel as you nodded.

"Yes. I have acquainted myself with Laswell and talked about your next move. Y deja de burlarte del coronel, sé profesional.” (And stop teasing Colonel, be professional.) You nodded.

"By all means, please do tell." Urged Graves.

"There's a small selected house in the outskirts of Las Almas. We figured they(Cartel) could be there. And I think possibly, El Sin Nombre." You told the males as you showed them a picture of the house and the address.

"So we just go there and tackle the guy or whoever El Sin Nombre is?" Summed up Soap as you nodded.

"Bingo. All the vehicles and weapons are at your disposal. The only thing we need for this mission is you and El Sin Nombre back. And as head of the medical department, I want you all to be unharmed during this mission if you can." You finished.

"We'll do our best. Let's move! Volveré.” (I'll be back.) Alejandro kissed the side of your head as you smiled, "Vuelve pronto.” (Be back soon.)

"Rudy. Permanezca en (S/N) y en espera.” (Stay with (Y/N) and standby.) Alejandro ordered his second in command.

Rudy gave his leader a nod, " Si Colonel." (Sí, coronel.)

You scoffed, "I don't need protection."

As soon as the men left Rudy started to silently cackle, "Say that again when you were cornered by three big men ready to tackle you down if Alejandro wasn't there to save you."

"Rudy! ¡Cállate! (Shush!)" You hit the man on his back as he only laughed more.

"Eres tan lindo cuando estás loco, Ángel.” (You are so cute when you’re mad, Angel.) The man before you held your hand as you had to register what he had said, making you turn away.

"Estúpido... decir cosas así sin darme una advertencia adecuada…" (Stupid...saying stuff like that without giving me a proper warning...)

"I'm glad to be called stupid by you. Come on, why don't we hang out for a bit, hm? That is...if you'd like to spend time with all your papers instead of me." Suggested Rodoflo making you laugh at how dramatic he is.

"Don't worry, Para. I'm all yours for the rest of the day."

You didn't know that the man was flustered by your statement before he started jogging to catch up to you.

~~~

"WHERE IS HE?" You yelled as some masked men decided it was a good idea to invade your base.

"Angel! We gotta go! They're here to arrest us!" Rudy grabbed your hand and led you to a secret pathway out of the base before you'd be detained/arrested by the mysterious masked men.

"Rudy! ¿¡Qué está pasando!? ¿Quiénes eran esos tipos y dónde está mi hermano?!” (What's going on!? Who were those guys and where is my brother?!) The moment you enter a small black SUV is when you bomb the second in command with questions.

"Graves se volvió y acogió a Alejandro. Lo recuperaremos.” (Graves turned and took Alejandro in. We're getting him back.) Responded Rudy as he drove to the safe house.

"That pendejo(dumbass)! I'll sever him up when I find his body if he did something to my brother! Let's go and break him out." You said as you got a few guns and put on some tactical gear.

But before you can continue on suiting up Rudy held your shoulders, "I can't let you go, Angel. Not when Alejandro told me to keep you safe."

"Rudy. I joined at the same time with you and Ale. I've been a soldier before being a doctor. I know how to use a gun." You reminded me.

"Sé que no eres débil, amor. Pero no puedo soportar que te lastimen ahí fuera. Déjame traerlo de vuelta.” (I know you're not weak, love. But I can't bear you to get hurt out there. Let me bring him back.)

You knew Rudy wasn't going to let you go but you still want to protest, "But Rudy...Alejandro is–"

You were cut off by some soft warm lips on your own for a few moments before they were pulled away.

"Por favor(Please), Angel." He looked in your eyes with a pleading look making you sigh and nod.

"One injury and I'm going to find that American myself if he hurts you." You warned making him smile.

"I'll keep that in mind. See you." He nodded as you both did your handshake.

"See you, Rudes."

~~~

While Rodolfo went to check the perimeter you went to the small medical area of the safe house before you heard a noise outside. You radioed to your ally immediately.

"Rudy? Alguien está afuera." (Someone 's outside.)

"Quédate quieto. Estoy atrás dirigiéndome al área principal de la casa. Quédate en las sombras."  (Stay put. I'm in the back heading to the main area of the house. Stay in the shadows.)

"Rog."

It was quiet for a few moments making you grab a pistol and a few throwing knives before using the shadows as an advantage.

You stopped dead in your tracks when you heard someone get in from the window making you hide behind a large wooden pole.

A red laser appeared on the man's shoulder, "Don't move." A deep voice was heard throughout the house before a knife was heard hitting the wooden pole.

"¿Quién es?" (Who is it?)

You didn't wait for Rudy to get a reply as you threw a warning knife back at the men as it hit the window near them, "Cac naomh...!" (Holy shit...!) Lowly exclaimed a Scottish voice making you remember on the men you've met before at the base.

"Rodolfo!"

"Soap! Ghost!"

Rudy got out of his hiding spot as you stayed put in the shadows.

"Nice throw." Rodolfo gave back the knife to the Lieutenant.

"What about the other one? Who threw it?" Asked the masked soldier.

"Ángel. Está bien. Si estás cerca, puedes salir ahora." (Angel. It 's okay. If you're near, you can come out now.)

"Podrías haberme dicho que tendríamos invitados, Rudy." (You could've told me we'd have guests, Rudy.) You appeared from the shadows making the Scottish soldier curse under his breath.

"That was you wasn't it?" Asked the masked soldier as you nodded.

"Forgive me about that. I didn't know it was you." You apologized before thanking Soap for giving your knife back.

"That was a good one. Almost had me there." Praised the Scottish man as you smiled, "Ale always wanted me to be prepared for every situation. I was a soldier before being a doctor."

"Speaking of that. You two were on the run?" Asked Rudy.

"Yeah."

"But I was on the run. Ghost waited for me." Clarified Soap.

"Of course no?" You asked.

"No–"

"Yes. This happened on my watch. And I need help to fix it. We're a team. No one fights alone." Cut off Ghost as Soap nodded.

"Why did Graves turn?" Rudy asked the bombing question.

"We don't know. But no can be trusted out there. Price, Shepherd, Laswell, and all others are considered hostiles." Answered Ghost.

"Except for–" you cut off the Scottish soldier, "Alejandro. He was taken, no?"

"Yes. And we're getting him back." Responded Ghost.

Rudy then led the group to a table and explained where your brother was being held.

They quickly got into gear to get the Colonel back.

"I'll stand by and head towards our other base. It isn't completely safe here." You told the men making them agree.

"Be safe, Doc." Nodded Soap as you gave a nod as well.

"Nice throw back there." The Lieutenant praised you, making you smile, "You as well."

Rudy held your head before giving you a silent message with his eyes, "Volveré contigo." (I will come back to you.)

"You better, Tonto.” (Dumbass) You whispered back before doing your handshake.

(While heading to the prison.)

Soap was a bit curious about the relationship you and Rudy had, "Rodolfo. What kind of relationship are you in with the doc?"

"Àngel's been with me and Alejandro since we've joined. 20 years to be exact. Toughest woman I've met in my life. Same goes to Alejandro. We swore to protect her as she's saved our lives so many times. That's why the Colonel always tells me to keep close to her, to keep her safe." Answered the second in command.

"Hm. Seems like you've done a good job."

"Thanks."

"Feels like you two are closer than friends." Jumped in Ghost.

"We are. It's a bit classified." Responded Rudy.

"Classified, eh? Don't think Alejandro would like that." Joked Soap.

"Hm. He didn't at the beginning." Lowly chuckled the Mexican before he changed the subject and went to their task.

(After getting Alejandro out.)

"What about my sister Rudy? Is she..." started the Colonel as he was handed a rifle.

"She's fine, Colonel. She went to a more secure base. That's where we're going too." Nodded Rudy.

"Good. Let's get my men out." Stated Alejandro.

"Wait a second...You have a sister Alejandro?!" Said a bit too loudly Soap as they continued to move forward in the prison.

"Be more quiet Soap. We're in bloody enemy territory." Scolded Ghost.

"Sí (Yes). I kept it a secret to protect her. She wanted to join me and Rudy to look after us. I trust you and Ghost so I'm telling you this now."

"Thank you for trusting us. Won't tell a soul." Thanked John.

"Of course."

~~~

You were ordering around some Vaqueros to prepare for the fight that Alejandro would like to have ASAP since Graves turned.

"¡Escucha ahora! (Listen now!)" Whistled the Colonel to his men as you ran up to him.

"¡Gracias a Dios...! (Thank goodness...!) Are you okay?" You asked as you examined your brother's face as he only smiled.

"I'm fine hermana. (Sister.) Glad you're safe too." Alejandro kissed your forehead making you smile before you two held each other's hands as a greeting.

"No way I'm leaving you and Rudy alone." You joked as you saw Rudy making you hug him.

"Estoy de vuelta como le prometí a mi amor." (I'm back as promised my love.)

"Me alegro de que hayas vuelto." (Glad you're back.)

"I'm confused here right now." Said Soap as you smiled at him and Ghost.

"Captain, Sergeant Garrick. This is my sister, (Y/N) Vargas. The head of the medical department of Los Vaqueros." Introduced your brother as you nodded to the new sergeant and the captain who was beside him.

"Delighted to meet you Miss Vargas. Captain Price of TF 141." Captain Price nodded towards you and even took off his hat in much more proper greeting.

The new sergeant beside him nodded as well, "Same here."

"Nice to meet you Captain, Sergeant." You greeted back.

"Wait! You're the sister!? This whole time?!" Yelled Soap making you grin.

"You just caught on to that Johnny?" Asked the masked soldier.

"I thought it was obvious by how affectionate he is. But yes, he is my blood brother." You responded.

"So then, what's your relationship with Rodolfo?" Asked Soap.

"Ella es mi ángel. (She's my angel.) My wife of 6 years." Answered the second in command as he held your left hand.

"What?! I only thought you two were close friends!" To TOTALLY clarify, Soap did NOT see that coming. He honestly thought you were dating Alejandro by how close you two are. And thought you were the sister of Rudy. While trying to figure out who could be the Colonel’s sister.

"We get that a lot. Some actually thought I was my own brother's wife a few times before Rudy made it public to the person who asked. Al menos podrías haber aclarado lo de la hermana, idiota. (You could've at least clarified the sister thing idiot.)" You laughed a bit as you explained the misinformation before scolding your husband.

"Alejandro told me to keep it secret, querida." (darling)

"Oi! Lovebirds! Let's move. We got an American to finish." Said your brother as you gave him a small playful glare before following him and the team to the table.

Captain Price was the one to talk about the plan as they all grabbed skeleton masks naming themselves to be the "Ghost Team."

You almost did a double take when Ghost took off his own mask to the team as Price welcomed him back, "Good to see you, Simon."

Since you and Rudy were near Gaz and Soap you whispered to the Scottish soldier, "Better engrave that in your head before you forget Sergeant."

He huffed meaning he found it funny making you do a small grin before the men went to all put masks on.

"Okay, the first team is Alejandro, Sergeant Garrick with some Vaqueros to secure Valeria and possibly our base again. Alejandro will be leading since he knows the base well. The next team consists of Rudy, Ghost, Soap with Vaqueros. Ghost will be leading the team. The third team will be Price in a helicopter to assist in the air with a pilot. Laswell had already got the coordinates to where you will be dropped off at the base. Any objections?" You explained as you showed your tablet and the teams.

None of the men said anything making you learn they understood and have no complaints.

"Nice one, Doc. Let's move." Praised the captain making you smile, "Delighted to be of help captain."

Soap and you did a small high five as you gave a nod to Ghost and Gaz.

"Be safe." You said as you hugged your brother.

"Always. You too!" He said as he joined Gaz and the Vaqueros on his team.

Rudy gave you a loving look, "Te amo.” (I love you.)

You smiled before putting his forehead on yours, "Yo también te amo a ti, mi marido. (I love you as well my husband.) Esté a salvo y regrese conmigo.” (Be safe and come back to me.)

"haría cualquier cosa que estuviera en mi poder para volver con mi esposa. Nos vemos pronto, Ángel." (I'd do anything in my power to come back to my wife. See you soon, angel.)

"You're so romantic. Go." You chuckled as he squeezed your hand before leaving, "You know it!" You heard him say, making you laugh.

~~~

It was a few hours and there were already so many Vaqueros that got injured while giving Graves some payback as you already had to operate on 12 men and women.

It was a rush but none had suffered any severe injuries, just some deep gashes, big cuts and strained limbs. With a few who got a hit on the side of some bullets but at least no surgery this time!

While you started on the paperwork one of your nurses appeared to tell you some news, "Doc. El Coronel y el segundo al mando están de regreso con sus equipos. Te están esperando afuera." (The Colonel and second in command are back with their teams. They're waiting for you outside.)

"Finalmente. (Finally.) Gracias. (Thank you.) Estás a cargo hasta que yo regrese.” (You're in charge till I get back.)

"Sí, Doc.” (Yes, Doc.)

You walked outside making the men turn to you as Alejandro was first to greet you, "Hope you weren't busy, flor (flower)."

"Not really. Except for the numerous patients I had to stabilize with a small needle and be covered in blood while patching up wounds. Graves is gone...?"

Soap nodded, "Blew him up to smitherins." You nodded as you did a fist bump to the Scottish man.

"Valeria will stay in our custody until further notice. My sister will interrogate her more if  she hides more information from us." Alejandro spoke up.

"Valeria, huh? Seems like she was trying to keep the war and terrorism intact for her business with the Cartel. Not surprised at her being El Sin Nombre." You hummed as the said woman was seen getting into the black SUV.

"So the golden child appears at last. ¿Cómo estás? Espero que Alejandro no te haya ocultado mucho sobre nosotros.” (How are you? Hope Alejandro hasn't hid that much from you about us.) Smirked the ex female soldier towards you.

"I got this." You stopped your brother from roasting the bitch in front of you, "¡Será mejor que mires lo que dices, perra! Los usaré contra ti.” (You better watch what you say, bitch! I'll be using them against you.) You swore to her in Spanish before signaling the men to take her away already.

"Steamin' fuckin' Jesus...You're wife is something Rodolfo." Said Soap to your husband as the man smiled, "She is. Now you know why I married her."

"She's still my Angel Rudy. She's my sister. Well it looks like this is it, eh?" Retorted playfully to the Colonel before smiling towards Ghost and Soap.

"Guess it is. Keep fighting the good fight, hermano.” (Brother) Soap and Alejandro shook each other's hands while patting each other's shoulders.

"To the bitter end my brother."

"Good luck amigos.” (Friends) Rudy then shook Soap's hand right after.

"It was nice meeting you, (Y/N). Hope to see you soon." Smiled the sergeant to you as you both did a small fist bump, "Of course. Same here Soap. Esté seguro ahí fuera." (Be safe out there.)

"Si hermana." (Yes sister.) You smiled when he talked in Spanish with his accent as he then patted Ghost on the shoulder so they could head out in the chopper waiting for them.

"Keep your throws well." Simply said Ghost towards you as you nodded, "You too."

"Oi Ghost!" Your brother stopped the Lieutenant, "No te pierdas, hermano.” (Don't get lost, brother.)

"A huevo!"(Of course!) He yelled with a fist in the air before turning back to the chopper.

Alejandro chuckled at that as you saw them leave.

"You made them learn Spanish, didn't you?" You asked.

"Hey, the more the merrier, no?" Laughed your brother, "Vamos. (Come on.) We get the afternoon for ourselves if we get the puta (bitch) locked away in time."

"Rudy? I almost forgot. Glad you're back, mi corazón.” (My heart.) You kissed his lips briefly before patting his chest a few times.

"Hey. I told you I'd do anything in my power to come back to you. Come on, let's go before your brother teases us again." Chuckled your husband as he opened the door of the van for you.

"Too late! Move, you two! Or else I'll make you!" Yelled the Colonel making you and Rudy laugh as you both entered the van.

"Wanna go on a date later on? It's been a while." Asked Rudy.

"I'd love that." You smiled.

"Oi. What did I say about being cariñoso(lovey dovey/loving) while on duty?" Teased Alejandro.

"Nothing, Ale. This is the first time you've spoken of that ever since me and Rudy got married, pendejo. (Stupid/dumbass, etc)" You retorted as you all laughed and headed to the place where Valeria will be locked up.

(Bonus! Here's you taking care of Rudy after he met Hassan. Note: he was shot with adrenaline during the process of the bullet extraction.)

You shot Rudy with adrenaline so the process of extracting the bullet will be less painful.

"Eres tan bueno conmigo.” He murmured to you, eyes blown from the adrenaline. (You're so good to me.) 

“Te amo mucho.” (I love you so much.) Your husband told you as you did your work on his injury. “Eres un verdadero Ángel que los dioses me han regalado. (You're a true Angel that the gods have gifted me.) Eres una doctora y una esposa increíbles." (You are an amazing doctor and wife.) Rudy babbled on and on. It lasted at least 5 five minutes.

You had to force yourself from not smiling from ear to ear at the compliments your husband has given you but also found it funny since it was due to the effects of the syringe mostly but he's still behind those words.

"Cállate ahora, amor. Déjame ayudarte. Ahorra el aliento." (Hush now, love. Let me help you. Save your breath.) You whispered to the man you're operating before giving a small face rub to assure him you're still there beside him.

But your hand that held his cheek was trapped by the arm that wasn't shot, You could see the love and adoration in his eyes.

"¿Cómo tuve tanta suerte?" (How did I get so lucky?)

That made your heart jump at how adorable he looked. (He'd kill you if you said it out loud.)

"I should be saying that. Now lie back down and rest up, the syringe won't last long and I'm only almost done." You gently put him down so his bruised rib and other injuries you've treated wouldn't get irritated.

"Please say yes if I ask you to have a family with me in the future. I want to spend eternity with you, amor. Eres una diosa para mí. (You're a goddess to me.) Let me worship you."

You were so glad that your medical room was slightly dim lighted so your husband wouldn't see your taken aback face. But you were regardless, happy he had life goals set already.

"Rudy...I'd love that. All of it, but please. Save your strength. And I'm no goddess, just a doctor, Mr. Parra." You finally got the bullet out of his arm and now it was time to stitch him up. You had to use another syringe since the last one was getting weaker.

"Tonterías. (Nonsense) You are one."

"Rudy..." You warned him, but you just wanted him to rest instead of forcing himself to assure you he'd be fine or him spouting his praise towards his wife.

"Sólo que decir mi nombre me hace feliz. Esa es una verdadera diosa para mí."(Just you saying my name makes me happy. That's a true goddess to me.)

"You are such a hopeless romantic."

"Only for you, armor. Only for you."

[widowsistersandfriends]

Giggly Quizzes

Request: hello! I’m currently in my exam finals and I’m really stressed about it. So I was wondering if you could do a fic where the reader is florence pugh’s younger sister (like age 17 aprox) and she notices that the reader is way to stressed about her final exams so she distracts reader with their studying giving them tons of tickles to relax them. Reading your fics really have been a distraction during this stressful weeks!

Note: Thank you so much for this awesome request!! I had so much fun writing this one, and I'm sorry I wasn't able to get it out earlier. I hope you did well on your finals and I hope you enjoy this fic!

Summary: Florence is your older sister and she helps you study and relax for your finals by tickling you for every question you get wrong. (ler!florence x lee!reader)

Word Count: 1641

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You were currently studying for finals, also known as the most stressful week of the year. You were holed up in your room once again, hunkered down over your books. The sun had started to set, so you turned on your room light and lamp to help you see better. 

Just then, you heard your sister calling you down for dinner. You hastily closed your books and went downstairs. Tonight you were having your favorite meal: chicken tenders and mashed potatoes. You eyed the food eagerly, scooping some broccoli onto your plate.

“How has studying been?” Florence asked, pouring you a glass of juice. 

“I’m really stressed if I’m being honest,” you admitted, eating a spoonful of mashed potatoes.

“I understand. Studying is hard, but you’re doing an amazing job,” Florence reassured you. 

“I just wish I could somehow be more efficient in my studying. I always feel like I’m reading the same word over and over again,” you said, taking a bite of a chicken tender.

“Maybe I could help you?” Florence offered.

“Oh I don’t know, I don’t want to stress you out too,” you said solemnly. 

“But I’ll be more stressed if you continue to stress and not let me help with the stress,” Florence said, now making you giggle from her ridiculous statement. 

“I guess you already helped by making me laugh,” you commented.

“Is that what I need to do? Make you laugh so you won’t stress as much?” Florence asked, a mischievous glint in her eyes.

“You can try,” you said, challenging her.

After dinner, Florence came upstairs with you to help you study. 

“How about I quiz you on some flashcards or vocabulary or stuff like that?” Florence suggested.

“That’s a good idea. I’ll be able to see what I know and what I need to work on,” you agreed.

Florence started quizzing you on vocab and other facts for your Anatomy and Physiology finals. You found yourself getting frustrated, as the facts and definitions seemed to blur and confused you even more.

“Ughhh, I am never gonna get the hang of this,” you complained, putting your face into your hands.

Florence came over and patted your back comfortingly, knowing that you just needed to vent.

“It’s ridiculous that they make us memorize all these facts when we have access to the internet which can tell us in less than a second,” you stated with a huff, throwing your flashcards onto the table. 

“Here, why don’t we take a break and come back to this later. You need to take some time and rest those eyes. Let the material sink in,” Florence said.

“Alright,” you agreed, flopping onto your bed.

“Want a massage?” Florence asked. You nodded.

Florence began to massage your lower back and shoulders, as you tried to relax under her touch. She began to massage the muscles just next to your spine, which happened to be really tender. You jerked when she used her thumbs to massage that area.

“Oh I’m so sorry Y/N! I’ll be gentle,” Florence said. 

“Is this okay?” Florence asked after a bit.

“Hmm, you could be better,” you joked, and Florence knew you were beginning to relax into your goofy self again.

“What was that?” Florence asked, giving your sides a squeeze.

Ah! Florence nohohoho don’t do that!” You giggled out, unable to escape, as your sister was on top of you.

“Don’t do what? This?” Florence asked, as she gave your sides another squeeze, making you jump and yelp. You were glad that she couldn’t see your growing smile, as you were still face down.

“Don’t tell me you’re ticklish?” Florence asked, now poking your ribs.

“Ihihihm nohohot!” You declared, bringing your arms down to wrap over your torso.

“17 years and I just found out now?!? How dare you hide this from me!” Florence playfully scolded, as she reached under your shirt to spider over your sides.

“STAHAHAP,” you belly laughed, twisting and turning as much as you could.

“What? You said I could be better, right? What’s better than making you laugh and relax?” Florence teased, now moving her hands up to tickle your armpits. You let out a squeal, clamping your arms down and wheezing with laughter.

“You’re ticklish here too?” Florence said with a laugh, continuing her attack for a bit before giving you a break. 

“You’re so mean,” you said, turning to glare at her.

“Hey, it’s your fault for being ticklish,” Florence said with a shrug.

Before you could retort, you felt ten nails wiggling over the back of your thighs and knees.

You gasped and bucked against her, kicking around as you were once again broken down into hysterical giggles. 

“FLOREHEHENCE THIHIHIS IHIHSN’T FUHUHUNNY,” you shouted, reaching around to smack her to get her to stop. However, this left your armpits open, which Florence made sure to make you pay for.

You yelped and convulsed, shouting at her to stop. Florence obliged, laughing at your state of panic. 

“Here, I’ll give you a break and go back to massaging you,” Florence said, but instead of resuming on your back, she moved down towards your feet.

“W-what are you doing?” You asked fearfully.

“Helping you relax,” Florence said with an evil grin.

She began to lightly massage your feet, as you fought to not giggle.

“Is this relaxing?” Florence asked, as you shook your head while giggling. 

“Yohohou knohohow ihihit’s nohohohot,” you giggled, trying to kick her. 

“Actually, you just gave me a new idea,” Florence said, now going to your desk to pick up your stack of flashcards.

“I’m going to quiz you on these, and if you get it correct, I’ll put it in this pile. If you get it wrong, I’ll put it in another pile,” Florence explained, as you nodded.

“But, in addition, if you get it wrong, you will get tickled for 15 seconds,” Florence said, smirking at your wide eyes.

“That’s not fair!” You shouted.

“Do you want to ace your finals or not?” Florence said, giving you a look of warning. You huffed in annoyance, knowing that you were trapped. 

You were face up now, and Florence asked you the first question.

“What is the name of the test for your foot reflex, and what is the difference between infants and adults with this test?” 

“The Babinski reflex, and for adults the toes should curl while infants their toes fan out,” you stated confidently.

“That’s correct,” Florence said, putting it in the first pile.

You yelped, as you felt Florence run a nail down your foot. 

“Just testing to see if it works,” Florence said with a grin, as you rolled your eyes.

“What is corpus albicans?” Florence asked.

You thought for a bit, knowing it was on the tip of your tongue.

“Ugh, I just can’t think of it,” you said sadly.

“It’s the scarring that happens when the corpus luteum sheds every month. This is why women have a harder time getting pregnant when they are older. The scarring makes it harder,” Florence explained, as you nodded and made a mental note in your head. 

“You know what that means,” Florence said, wiggling her nails over your feet.

“HAHAHAHAAHA STAHAHAAHAP PLEHEHEASE,” you screamed, unable to kick as she sat on your shins. You continued to laugh and scream for the next 15 seconds until she finally stopped.

“Next question. What does ACL stand for and where is it located?” Your sister asked.

“Anterior cruciate ligament. It’s located in the knee,” you responded.

“Good job,” Florence said, patting you.

“Which muscle has more slow twitch muscle fibers, the soleus or gastrocnemius?” 

You debated for a bit, before choosing gastrocnemius.

“Get ready to get tickled,” Florence said.

“Which spot shall I pick?” Florence asked.

She eyed you for a bit before sticking her finger in your belly button, as you screamed and tried to push her away.

“Shouldn’t have gotten it wrong!” Florence teased. After she tormented your belly button, she explained the answer.

“The soleus has more slow twitch fibers because those muscles are used for endurance. For example, when you are standing for long periods of time, you are using your soleus muscle much more than the gastrocnemius. The gastrocnemius is used for when you sprint or run quickly for a short amount of time,” Florence said.

She quizzed you a bit more, finding more tickle spots on you as she went along. However, the tickling helped you remember the answers better.

“You know what? Now that you’ve mastered all of your cards, I think you deserve a reward,” Florence said.

“Really?” You said excitedly. 

“A full body wrecking,” Florence said, knowing that you had gotten some wrong on purpose just to get tickled.

“What!?! No!” You shouted, as Florence pinned your arms above your head and began scribbling over your stomach.

“FLOHOHO STAHAHAHAP,” you shouted, sucking your stomach in to avoid her hands.

She made sure to lean down and give you several raspberries to get you screaming with laughter. 

Her fingers ventured onto your sides, ribs, and armpits once again, before spidering around your neck and chin, making you snort and giggle hysterically. She then reached down to squeeze your hips and thighs, making you squeal with glee. She flipped you over once more and began to spider over your back, making you shriek and pound the bed desperately. 

“OHOHOKAHAHAY PLEHEHEASE IHIIVE HAD ENOHOUGH,” you screamed, as she finally let you up.

“That was awful,” you said breathlessly.

“Don’t lie, you loved it,” Florence said, poking you in the ribs.

“Ow!” You yelped. 

It was safe to say that you aced your anatomy and physiology finals that week thanks to the immense amount of tickling you faced from your sister. However, you held off on telling your sister because you knew your reward would be another wrecking ;)

[seros-chaotic-scribbles]

Favorite Customer

sho haizono x [frostheim student] reader!

a/n: oh god i havent written a fanfic in YEARS! please be gentle with me (no beta because that's scary!!!)! apologies for any occ sho! this lil fic is dedicated to proxy from my TD guild! <3 enjoy!

The food truck had been a hit since it opened, attracting crowds of students during lunch and dinner. Faces blurred together and Sho struggled with keeping track of everyone. There were a couple of exceptions, of course, Subaru, Leo, the honor student, and you. 

At first, he thought you were a bit strange. Unlike the others who stopped by you tended to change your order. Each day brought a new dish with a handful of customizations that made him think you were purposely trying to annoy him. The first time he had decided to confront you on it led to no results. You were an expert at dodging the question, a simple smile and flutter of your eyelashes had him stunned, stuttering and quickly turning away to work. It was the way you effortlessly seemed to brush off his passive-aggressive nature, the fact that you decided to tease him for it rather than glare due to the reputation of his house. 

It made him feel… oddly soft.

He didn’t understand at first. The way his brain refused to comprehend your motives, the sudden increase in temperature that came with your arrival, the urge to prove that he could meet your requests with only a few complaints mumbled under his breath. He used to hate your visits, but now he looked forward to them. In fact, he was a bit worried at how Leo had started to pick up on his apparent ‘favoritism’…

“I told you, she’s just a customer.” 

Sho felt like he had repeated that at least ten times now. 

“Mhm… just a customer alright, one you let walk all over you anytime she smiles. I’m surprised you haven’t just started giving her meals for free.”

Leo’s tone was filled with disapproval and… disgust. It was hard to pinpoint the exact negative emotion he was expressing. 

“Yeah, yeah… Whatever…”

Sho had begun to tune out Leo’s rambling, instead turning his focus to getting ready for the dinner rush. Classes were done for the day and students were bound to be hungry. Hopefully, you would show up early and—

“I mean, I don’t even understand what you see in her. She’s in the same house as that dumbass who tried to fight you. Isn’t that a sign to ignore her?”

Leo’s voice was starting to annoy him. Sho could deal with his own belittlement but hearing the way the silver-haired teen talked about you had him tensing. He knew he could put an end to his words but there would always be a consequence. Knowing Leo it’d be something stupid, especially with his newfound vice captain privileges…

“Don’t you think it’s annoying how she always has to have a different meal? Oh and those stupid customizations that she manages to get you to do! You always get mad at me when I change something so why don’t you get mad at her too? What’s the deal with that?”

Fuck the consequences.

Sho turned to face Leo, staring him down inside the small kitchen area of the truck. He watched his friend blink slowly as if he was confused by the anger that was building up in the truck. 

“Get out.”

“What?”

“Get. Out.”

Silence filled the kitchen as neither of them moved. Tension started to thicken the air as the chatter of students could be heard. The rush would begin soon.

Leo moved first with a roll of his eyes.

“Fine, fine, I get it. Work has you stressed or whatever. Have fun!~”

Completely ignoring the real reason behind Sho’s anger, Leo took his leave with a cheerful smile. He didn’t seem to care about the state he had left his supposed friend in nor the fact that people were already starting to form a line outside the truck. At least Sho could use the rush to help get his mind off of Leo’s words and the… implications they held on his feelings towards you.

Time went by far too fast for Sho’s liking. His stomach held a slight knot from his earlier bout of anger and he struggled quite a bit with the number of students. He was definitely going to need to find someone to help… at least with prep work beforehand. It seemed like there was always something more to do.

But, what bothered him most about this rush wasn’t the work or the annoyance students showed when he took ‘too long’, it was the fact that you hadn’t shown up.

The sky was darkening and Sho watched as a few stragglers went towards their dorms. Soon the campus would be quiet. This had been the first time that you hadn’t shown up. You hadn’t mentioned anything at lunch about not being here…

So he decided to stay open. Just for a bit longer. Just in case…

The silence allowed him to think. 

Leo had been pushing him earlier, that much had become obvious. But why? It was like he was trying to make Sho angry, trying to force a reaction out of him. 

He didn’t… He didn’t actually like you, did he?

No. No, that was stupid. 

You had become friends. That’s all. Friends. 

Friends over a series of conversations, over food, over your careful observations of his cooking habits, over the way you endlessly seemed to come up with challenges for him, the gentle curiosity you showed, the concern when he mentioned leaving for training, or the bruises that followed.

He stood there, stuck in a particular memory. It was the day after a harsher training session with Alan, the bruise that had bloomed on his shoulder was obviously causing him pain. He tried to hide it and work through it, but you saw past his efforts. 

He hadn’t realized it but the way you insisted he take a break, just a day off to heal, reverberated around in his subconscious. Your tone had been so soft, so sweet…

“Oh fuck.”

He did like you. 

Leo had figured it out before him. 

Sho just had to hope that he hadn’t gotten to you beforehand, talked to you about it, somehow twisted it, and—

“Hey, Sho!”

Your voice broke his thoughts, pulling his gaze to you. You seemed slightly disheveled, and out of breath as you approached the truck. Stray hairs stuck to your face as you tried to regain your composure.

Had you sprinted all the way here?

“Sorry, I’m so late! Luca—“ you took a deep breath in before flashing a bit of an embarrassed smile,” He went a bit rougher on training today. I was worried you’d already be closed and I’d have to sneak into the Vagastrom dorms just to have dinner.”

Sho blinked for a moment. You would sneak into his dorm… to see him? The notion had his ears turning red as he quickly looked away, rubbing the back of his neck.

“I would just bring you dinner at that point… Sneaking in would only get both of us in trouble.”

“Aww Sho! You care about me getting in trouble? That’s so sweet!~” 

Your laughter filled the night air and for the first time that night, Sho felt his body relax. He shook his head before leaning against the counter of the truck, looking down at you.

“Whatever. What do you want tonight?”

He feigned disinterest but his small smile gave him away.

You pretended to look over the menu before meeting his gaze. There was a mischievous glint in your eyes. He wasn’t going to like this, was he?

“Let me cook for you.”

Huh?

Sho just stared.

Had he heard you correctly?

“What?”

“I said,” you held the word for a moment as you walked to the side door. There was no hesitation in your movements as you opened it,” Let me cook for you! It’ll be a nice change. Don’t look at me like that!”

He didn’t believe in your abilities. Maybe he shouldn’t make that obvious? I mean there was a reason you came to him for nearly every meal, right? He really shouldn’t let you…

But when you looked at him like that he didn’t know if he could say no. There was determination in your eyes and a confidence that you didn’t seem to have before. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt… Plus it was just one meal…

Sho sighed, crossing his arms and shaking his head. If this ended in disaster he would never let you live it down. 

“Fine… Just don’t make a mess.”

“I won’t! Scouts honor!”

You did a two-finger salute before moving towards the fridge, opening it, and searching through the leftovers from the dinner rush.

“Wait…” Sho leaned against the counter, watching your movements as he considered what you said,” Were you ever even a part of the scouts…?”

Your lack of response didn’t help his confidence.

It wasn’t long before a pleasant aroma began to fill the food truck. You had ignored Sho’s questions about what you were making and instead kept the conversation flowing by asking about his day. He didn’t have much to tell but he hesitated when mentioning that Leo had been hanging out with him before the rush.

He saw the way your body tensed slightly upon the mention of his friend and the dread in his stomach from earlier returned. Had Leo mentioned something after all…?

“I don’t mean to be rude but…”

You started before trailing off, keeping your head turned towards the stove. You sighed for a moment before trying to start speaking again. It was clear you were putting a lot of thought behind your words.

“I know he’s your friend and all but don’t you think it’s rude that Leo knows you could use a hand but refuses to offer?”

Sho relaxed at your comment. You were just peeved with Leo’s laziness, nothing else. That was good at least. 

He shrugged as he moved to stand next to you, peering over your shoulder curiously.

“Leo only does things that interest him. Plus, he’s a terrible cook.”

You snorted at that before glancing at Sho. He swallowed, trying to avoid staring at you but it was hard when you seemed so relaxed. The slight smile on your lips seemed to hypnotize him. They looked so soft. 

Then he realized that you were saying something. Something that he had completely missed. He was an idiot. 

“What do you think?”

Your voice was so deceptively sweet. You absolutely knew he wasn’t listening. He refused to admit it though. That would be even more embarrassing.

So, he looked away, awkwardly clearing his throat.

“I didn’t know you could cook.”

“You didn’t know or didn’t think I could?”

“Want me to be honest?”

“Sho!”

You lightly nudged him, pretending to be annoyed at his underestimation of your abilities.

“What?! You come here for almost every meal. It was a reasonable assumption.”

“Do you think I only come here for the food?”

Your boldness caught him off guard. 

Sho turned back towards you, his heart beginning to race. His eyes were wide as he struggled to talk. He needed to say something! Anything! You were starting to look so unsure of yourself now, a blush taking over your features.

“Cute.”

No! Don’t say that!

He wanted to bang his head into a wall when your blush increased tenfold. He felt one of his own start to consume him as he started to rub the back of his neck. He should be suave, charming, not struggling like this. 

You two seemed to be at a standstill. Neither one of you could speak or look away. It was infuriating but in the best way. Sho couldn’t help the smile that formed on his face as he cleared his throat. 

Well, now or never right?

“I’m glad that you aren’t just using me for food.“ 

Oh, that had come out wrong. So wrong. He swallowed before trying to continue.

“I like seeing you every day! I wouldn’t mind if we, y’know, uh… spent more than just lunch and dinner together…”

He trailed off, suddenly unsure. He was trying to read your expression, it seemed to be a mix of shock and excitement. Your face was bright red and you were smiling. That was a good sign! 

Sho hadn’t realized how close the two of you had gotten. He was lost in the moment, struggling with how to express this softer side of him that he hadn’t paid attention to your movements. He watched as you slowly blinked before starting to talk.

“I’d like that too.”

It was as if time was moving in slow motion, your lips had just begun to brush his when—

“Is something burning?”

Sho had pulled away when the scent of burnt… whatever it was you had been making quickly took priority over the moment you two had been having. The two of you quickly worked in tandem to try and save the meal but it turned out it was beyond saving, much to your frustration. 

Luckily for you, there was someone who was more than happy to make you something else. 

[freaky-flawless]

Was drowning in Cleodeen thoughts last night.

[writeouswriter]

The curse has lifted (finally wrote more than like 10 words on something)

[zackmartin]

Z THE CONCEPT OF YOU REBOOTING VALIANT KNIGHT LITERALLY HAS ME FROTHING AT THE MOUTH. it literally never left my head i am always thinking about it at least a little bit. literally recently i came up with a concept for how some of my original characters for my spinoff would fit into valiant knight fnsnskdj and so i technically have like a rewrite/sequel concept that includes zenry and jasper/[redacted] fnsmdnkxnsn which included me rereading the chapters i beta'd for you to remember some details and i was like UGH THIS WAS SO GOOD I MISS IT

LASKDJOSKJVMODKMVLDSKJFSOKJFSLDKFJ HELLO?????????? ARE YOU AWARE THAT I'D LAY DOWN MY LIFE FOR YOU???? CAUSE I SERIOUSLY WOULD LAY DOWN MY LIFE FOR YOU!!!!! BUT AHHHHHHHHHHH

SERIOUSLY THOUGH, THIS IS ONE OF THE HIGHEST COMPLIMENTS I'VE EVER RECEIVED, I'M LEGIT GONNA CRY (affectionate), I'VE BEEN STARING AT THIS ASK FOR LIKE SIX HOURS, LIKE THERE AREN'T ENOUGH WORDS IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE TO ARTICULATE HOW MUCH THIS MEANS TO ME

but seriously, like I'm not trying to rag on my writing or anything, but I also know like. I'm not writing anything that's gonna be winning awards anytime soon or anything ground-breaking or anything, but that's never been my goal; and I just say all of that to say that the fact that you're still thinking about something of mine years later and it stuck with you so much that you want to put your own characters into it??????? That's literally so wild to me in the best way, I can't get over it. I'm so serious when I say again that this legit one of the best compliments I've ever received. (Also, if you're willing, I'd very much like to hear about this rewrite/sequel of sorts)

You have me legit thinking about it now. Like I told Pearl in the replies, I feel like my writing is leagues better (i reread stuff from that time period and just cringe now; but to be fair to my past self, she was a novice who was coming back to writing after a 10+ year break so it stands to reason) so I feel like I could do a lot more with it. There's soooo much of that world I want to flesh out that I wasn't skilled enough to do when I first started it. lsakdjf idk man, I might actually do it

[zmediaoutlet]

happy wincest wednesday! a stanford era q for u: continuity error or not, it was established that sam and dean hadnt spoken for two years rather than four. what do you think happened to make this so? Do you think it has anything to do with why Dean said in the finale that he was afraid Sam would tell him to get lost or get dead?

heyyyyy bud happy wincest wednesday (a week later, cough -- oh my god what is this everyone tag on the post creator? what? okay I'll try to move past it-- )

DO I THINK

THAT IT HAD SOMETHING TO DO

WITH THE LINE

(BEST LINE!)

YOU'D TELL ME TO GET LOST OR GET DEAD?

yeah I think they're related.

I prefer not to take the 'two years' thing as a continuity error. There's no real need to? In general, it's fun to try to take what the characters say as fact and just roll with them, because often that creates a pretty interesting story on its own. Now, Sam's actual amount of time at Stanford doesn't make a ton of sense on its own, w/r/t when his birthday is, that it was only November 2005 when everything starts -- but whatever. The two years/four years thing is still rad.

We're never told that Dean didn't talk to Sam for four years -- that means that at some points in Sam's freshman & sophomore years, they were still talking. And then we're told that Dean hasn't "bothered" him in two -- and that also means that Dean knows it's two years, more or less specifically, which means that Dean's been aware of that time passing whether or not Sam has. It's not like he just showed up like 'oh hey haven't talked to little bro in a while' -- he knows it's two years, and he knows that Sam will be hostile to his showing up, and then with the extra finale context he's scared that Sam will just slam the door in his face. [that sound you hear is my high pitched wailing.] No wonder he doesn't call and breaks in, to make sure Sam won't get the opportunity for at least that initial refusal.

Maybe this is unsatisfying but I don't actually have a strong hc for what happened to create that divide. I do like to headcanon (...or maybe this is actual canon) that Sam started dating Jess right around that two year mark, and therefore his spare time was taken up with girlfriend. And then from there, it is very easy to imagine Dean calling on the road somewhere in South Carolina, trying to stay awake by bothering his little brother, but in the three hour time difference Sam's on a date with this killer blonde and he silences his phone so as not to interrupt. And then maybe Dean's in Maine and he calls Sam because he's bored on a stakeout and Sam's watching a movie with his new maybe-he-can-call-her-his-girlfriend, and he misses that call, too. And then maybe the next time they do talk, Dean's kinda snippy-bitchy because, damn, you avoiding my calls?, and Sam's kinda snippy-bitchy back because, no, but he does have a real life, Dean, he isn't just waiting around for random VH1 Behind the Music trivia. And so maybe the next time Dean thinks to call, nursing his stitches in a motel room somewhere in Texas, he decides not to. Don't want to bother big time college boy, does he. And then maybe Sam hasn't heard from Dean in a while, and he actually makes the initial call, but that time Dean's with John and sees the name come up on the screen and doesn't want to start a fight, and Sam hears it go to voicemail and thinks, fine.

Just that. Drifting apart, because that's what happens. You think someone's going to be there your whole life and then they're not. And then it's easy to think, well, maybe they're not interested. And then maybe you get mad, and then you get sad, and then you have this weird simmering unresolved something. And then two years pass.

Can I just say: oof. In some ways I find that to be way more sad than other versions -- like a big fight they had, or some intense interaction (I know a lot of people like to imagine first time Stanford sex in there), or whatever. But in this way -- this fairly realistic way -- it's not the big violent knife cut that leaves a clean edge and bleeds and maybe you can stitch it up; it's instead like... idk, erosion, or accidentally grating off a big layer of skin. Hard to patch up easy. Lots of little painful edges that can't get fixed all in one go. Fantastic fic fodder, that way. :)

[hella1975]

wait hold on a ursa takes both zuko and azula away fic??? idk how anyone hasn’t done this concept but hella you’ve tapped into a concept that has to be explored at this point! making it zukka is also just the norm around here too.

ah im glad you like the sound of it! i refuse to believe im the first to think of that idea bc i dont think ive ever had an original thought but there's definitely a lack of ursa exploration in the fandom. the thing with this wip is that it's going to be so ginormous and so multi-faceted that it's actually really hard to explain the plot of? like ursa takes zuko and azula with her but ursa is so damaged by what she's been through and is too busy prioritising survival to be loving anymore and their life on the run is so brutal that zuko and azula - still only 9 and 11 years old which is a big reason of why their relationship is able to heal, bc they're still so young - really lean on each other to cope. initially it's a survival thing, but they grow to just genuinely get on well with and care deeply about each other. and one way they do that is that zuko starts telling azula stories! like the two of them become huge avatar nerds bc of these stories and actually i might just give you a snippet bc this is rlly hard to explain LMAO

Neither of them had any idea how to just be nice to each other, but Zuko wanted to be nice. He wanted Azula to be safe. He wanted to protect her. She was his little sister. She always had been, and she needed him. Now, more than ever. 

“You know, Mother used to tell me about our great-grandfather.” Zuko said quietly into the shadows, a whisper to ensure Ursa, always so quick to anger these days, didn’t wake up. “You know he was Avatar Roku?” 

For a while, it was painfully silent, to the point Zuko was certain Azula wouldn't respond. Then; “Of course I know. Some of us actually paid attention in our lessons.” Azula sniped, but she sounded a little too cutting, in a way she only sounded when she was unsure. She didn’t like it when she didn’t know what Zuko was leading to. 

Zuko turned to face her direction, the cheap blanket scratching his chin and not covering all of his body. At eleven-years-old, Zuko was finally starting to grow into himself.  

They were in a town on the outskirts of the Earth Kingdom, barely a speck on the map, and currently, their names were Riku and Aoi. Ursa has been very clear; her children were to never use their birthnames, no matter how alone they thought they were. They were living in a cottage with half a roof, their mother funding the rent by sewing patches onto dresses for a seamstress. She was barely in the house, but Zuko knew even when they left in a few day’s time – as they never stayed in one place longer than a week or two – he would still barely see Ursa. He wondered if she knew how reclusive she’d become. 

“She told me stories about all the Avatars. I always wished she’d tell you them too.” Zuko said a little sadly. “I never understood why she didn’t.” 

This silence was different, and they both knew Zuko wasn’t just talking about the stories. 

“Tell me.” Azula breathed, so quiet Zuko almost missed it. 

“The stories?” Zuko asked in surprise. He had been waiting for Azula to cut him down, to tell him to go away like she used to. But...  

He realised maybe Azula wanted to be nice too. Maybe she was tired of being looked at like a monster by the people supposed to love her.  

Maybe she was just a nine-year-old girl who needed a bedtime story every now and then. 

“Yes, Zuko.” Azula hissed, and his name was so shocking it was like a curse. “The stories. Tell me about the Avatars.” 

So, Zuko did. 

“Water, earth, fire, air.” Zuko whispered, remembering how Mother told it. In the shadows, Azula’s eyes burned gold. “Long ago, the four nations lived together, but everything changed when the Fire Nation, the superior nation, began to share its wealth. The Hundred Year War began, and the only person able to stand in the Fire Nation’s way was the Avatar, master of all four elements. But when the world called for him, he fled...” 

It became a tradition, after that. Zuko would lie beside his sister on the nights neither of them could sleep, and after an entire day of hiding himself, he’d turn to Azula and just talk. In Kyoshi Island, he told her of Avatar Kyoshi murdering Chin the Great. In Makapu village, he told her of Avatar Roku – Great-Grandfather Roku – battling a volcano. And in the Western Air Temple, he told her of the Avatar who never was. 

“He’s out there somewhere, though.” Zuko uttered wondrously. “One-hundred-and-twelve, the last airbender. Can you imagine it?” 

“You’re in your head too much.” Azula sighed. She always pretended not to care, but as the months dragged on, she allowed herself more. First, it was in her asking for a specific story. Then sometimes, she’d slip up and laugh. In the fragments of these nights handed over to ancient legends, as scraps of lies left behind in their wake with every new roof they found themselves beneath, Azula was more herself than ever. She could be, in front of her big brother. That was something she learned. 

They learned other things, too. They learned that the Earth Kingdom was starving, that the Fire Nation was hated, that people weren’t rebelling; they were suffering. The story changed. When Zuko saw technological advancements that bewildered him in the Northern Air Temple, he stopped saying that the Fire Nation was the superior nation. When he saw children with burn scars and amputated limbs, he changed ‘began to share its wealth’ to ‘attacked.’ When the stories he told his little sister of the Avatar turned into a lifeline, a speck of hope in a world of ashes, ‘fled’ became ‘vanished.’

Zuko learned that a war was a war, that his father was not a hero by any means, that they got out just in time. 

And it was hard, but the two had their own rebellions. Zuko and Azula didn’t get on in Caldera, but out here with a string of fake identities behind them and a death sentence at the end of it, they only had each other. Their mother was a wound, their father was a blade, and they were, through it all, still just kids. They leaned on each other in the places they used to bruise. Azula took the softness she tortured her brother over and began to protect it. Zuko took the coldness in his sister he used to despise and chased it away. When Azula drew the curtains and hid in cupboards to hold a flame in her palm and just breathe, Zuko made sure Ursa didn’t catch her. When Zuko lay beside Azula and talked to her until she finally fell asleep, Azula didn't push him away. 

Azula, he whispered, and it was a promise that she could still be who she wanted to be. 

Zuko, she breathed back, and it was a recognition that, through it all, she still saw him.