#but also JACK AND CATS. JACK AND BITTY AND CATS.

[buckysgrace]

Gator Tillman Headcanons

Just some random thoughts I had about baby boy tonight <3

I for sure think he was born premature? A teeny tiny little baby with big brown eyes lol.

Definitely got doted on because of his huge eyes and messy hair. Very hyper kid too, always needed to be doing something. Probably a biter tbh (spanked a lot sadly smh)

Threw an absolute fit when he was itty bitty and they were weening him off of the pacifier. That was his paci damn it!

Grew to love snakes because his mom hated them and he was quick to remove them from her garden. He thought it was funny to chase her while holding them

Roy use to make Linda keep it in a buzz cut because he hated how long it was on Gator. Thus, leaving Gator to find his own style when he was old enough.

He definitely showed cattle when he was younger. His favorite cow was named Rosie and he won several ribbons for how well kept she was <3

Knows how to ride a horse but doesn't have a desire to do so. Plus his lower back and hips are always so sore after

Prefers dogs over cats, but you best believe any time a cat is around him they're all up in his business

I also think he struggled with asthma when he was little too?? He hasn't had an attack in years but still carries an inhaler around

(don't bring up him vaping while having asthma, he gets very defensive and irritated lol)

Never been out of his hometown unless he needed to travel for competitions or for work. Probably never been on a real vacation before either.

I think he was always tall and lanky but stopped growing his sophomore year of high school?? He always wanted to be taller tho

Was in the FFA obviously.

Being an all-state quarter back I'm sure he had a ton of college offers? I imagine he was fairly average in school, probably enjoyed science more than anything else

Had a really hard time after his mom "left". I think he had a lot of anger issues at this time

His leg injury blew away any chances of him really believing that he could do better for himself, so he followed in Roys footsteps

He gets cold easy, so he always bundles up into layers and layers.

Sucks at cooking. Could not boil water to save his life. I think that he'd take cooking lessons later in life (or learn from someone hehe)

Has a surprisingly good green thumb if he'd keep up with it

Enjoys drawing in his free time and is actually really good at it.

Cannot survive anywhere where it gets too hot. He burns easily

He's in church every Sunday (sometimes Wednesday nights too, depending on his shifts) but it doesn't stop his potty mouth

Car lover of course. Likes to work on vehicles too. Occasionally welds I believe.

Loves going to car shows, or to tractor pulls lol

Most of his tattoos were random, little afterthoughts or done while he was drunk. I think he bought his own tattoo kit but opted out of it.

Flirts like a middle school boy. Will poke and prod at you, lots and lots of teasing. If you meet at a bar you best believe he's gonna be showing you all of his cool drinking tricks lol

A surprisingly good big brother, although Karen thinks he's a bad influence so he doesn't get to spend much time with them

Big fan of Game of Thrones but also loves Golden Girls lmao. And Westerns.

Does that thing where he acts like he's not interested in what's on TV but then he stands there with his hands on his hips watching the whole time lol

Do not ask him to pick you up something for the store, he will not find it

When he's high on weed he's very giggly; thinks everything is hilarious. Will absolutely lay underneath the stars and try to explain the way the universe works. Very snuggly and has the worst munchies (devours a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos in one sitting smh)

Will drink coffee (usually with a protein shake mixed in) but he 100% prefers energy drinks

Jack Daniels and PBR are obviously his drinks of choice hehe. Although he does love a good margarita occasionally

Absolutely devours some Taco Bell after he gets off the night shift. He always gets a box with a chalupa, beefy 5-layer burrito, and the fiesta potatoes but he's also getting a cheesy gordita crunch and the Cinnabon delights. And a Baja Blast. Mans has worked hard and he's hungry lmao

Hates ankle socks

For a late night snack he is breaking open something sweet. I imagine he prefers Heath bars and 100 Grand Bars.

He also loves carrot cake

[lemonandlime22]

So bitty yuu gets sick reactions/hc?

Sick Bitey child!Yuu

Warning(s): Long, cussing, not edited yet

A/N: This is so adorable, ty for requesting, I hope you enjoy! I did my best to get everyone in there lol.

[Bitey child!Yuu Masterlist] [Hc related sketch]

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You have probably gotten sick a whole hack of a lot in your little life

you just didn't know what it was

all you knew was that something was not right with your body.

First to notice is obv Grim

he does his best to take care of you, but he knows close to nothing about human biology or anything like that

Grim ends up taking you to school for help.

Imagen the sight it was for other students

a small child with a messy snot-covered face that has a slight red hue to it, eyes puffy from crying and constantly coughing and sniffling

and a fire cat monster thing panicking next to them.

You two end up walking past the meeting room for the HouseWardens, as the meeting was just ending.

Riddle is silently panicking while trying to check you over while scolding the both of you but mostly grim for coming to school.

Leona doesn't give a fuck and just walks back to his dorm to sleep and skip the rest of the school day.

Azul hands you his spare handkerchief to wipe yourself off with, to which Riddle sighs and takes said handkerchief to wipe your face for you.

another reason added to the list of why you call him mama

Kalim panics a little but tries to cheer you up by handing you one of his bracelets to play with,

Vil just goes,

"ew."

and walks to his next class.

Idia does the same as Vil, if he's even there,

Malleus- or Lilia more likely, would pick you up and take you to the infirmary while rubbing circles into your back.

The first years will prob visit you first,

Ace would bring cards so you won't be bored while you're in there.

Deuce would try to make you the soup that his mom used to make for him when he was sick, but he failed and Trey ended up helping and even making a couple of your favorite goodies for you too.

Jack has a few little siblings so he knows how to cheer up sick little kids, he'll prob bring you a children's book that would help his siblings when they were sick.

Epel brings you his family's apple juice that you love so much.

Sebek doesn't go anywhere your sick ass, what if he gets sick and accidentally gets Waka-sama sick?!?

Cater also wouldn't come but would send his good wishes with one of his dorm members.

Ruggie would bring you some donuts.

Floyd would come and try to annoy hang out with you but Jade would drag him away so you can get your rest.

Rook does a quick in-and-out check-in on you, he'll see how your doin', say a few fancy words, and leave.

Jamil is another one that doesn't go anywhere near you, and keeps Kalim away too.

Ortho would drop by to say hello and give you some advice he looked up on how to deal with sickness.

Silver is taken to visit you by Lilia, he gives you some words of encouragement, then passes out on one of the other beds.

Malleus would come later at night when your fast asleep, he'll bundle you up in your blanket like a little burrito and hold you for a little while, maybe take you on a walk around the campus for some fresh air.

Crowley doesn't even know your sick unit like 3 weeks after your all better.

Btw the ppl who check in on you the most are, Riddle, the ADeuce duo, Lilia, Kalim would try but like I said Jamil would keep him away, Malleus, and Grim is there permanently by your side the entire time.

[shadowysandwichphantom]

having feelings about pimms but if Jack never dropped out of the draft so they don't break up so they continue to have a not so healthy relationship bc neither of them got the character building from canon and what if they came out together like jack and bitty bc parallels but they were super messy bc jack never went to rehab and Kent never got his cat or the hockey team equivalent of timeout away from jack to think about his crimes and they never figure out how to stop constantly competing against each other but also the world or how to address their own issues

basically what if they were stuck with each other and rotted each other from the inside out

[mlobsters]

rewatching dune (1984) which i've seen a handful of times, fallen asleep during the desert scenes more than once, and have a fondness for but also haven't watched it in at least a decade. i want to watch the new movies but wanted to refresh my memory on this movie again first

something very brazil (1985) about this

talking giant brain creature has a vulva mouth, how could i forget

the shields and the slow knife live rent free in my head

let 👏 characters 👏 sweat👏

uh oh paul's gotta fight the spiky dick

paul's dad gave me willem dafoe double take

i think what was so effective for me in this movie was how memeable it was. i read the book and for some reason it was a slog for me, but that plus the movie really drilled these phrases into my daily thoughts. the sleeper must awaken, arrakis dune desert planet, fear is the mind killer, the spice must flow etc.

so i wonder if one of the main issues with this movie that people have is how much it relies on voiceover. i don't know about the complaints, just that it's generally not liked

👄

sweattty

"you are so beautiful, my baron. your skin, love to me. your diseases lovingly cared for, for all eternity." and they say romance is dead

i remember the heart plug pull vividly but the implied sexual assault while he's bleeding out by the baron, not so much. the gays are evil, guys

i feel like jessica and rachael from blade runner (1982) occupy the same place in my brain. another movie that put me to sleep a lot, with that afternoon sun and the smoke. knocks me right out

pulsating, then squirting for spacetime folding, got it 📝

is this not what hentai jizz looks like?

3 squirts and we made it to arrakis, dune, desert planet

i genuinely like how they do the shield effects

i had to go find clips of dean stockwell as al in quantum leap because i was so sure his voice was so much lower in that compared to this. and yes, it is! good job, brain

duke: "damn the spice!" *gasp*

you know, it's been a long ass time since i watched this. and the constant voiceover of characters voicing their thoughts is really getting heavy handed. show not tell, amirite 🤪 maybe it's because i know the story already, but for the most part i feel like the voiceover specifically to the character thoughts wasn't even explaining anything that wasn't already expressed in the scene anyway most of the time

the effects were nice having the sand blowing off, really helped give it scale

and now paul's gotta deal with the itty bitty flying dick of death!

so they make the bad guy fat with visible illness on his face, a murdering gay rapist and he wears nail polish. oh, and red hair. really hitting it out of the park

i think about this poison gas tooth thing on the regular

captain picard shouting "long live duke leto" while holding the pug and rushing into battle, i started cackling

womp womp with the poison tooth fail ;(

jack nance as nefud / bill smitrovich in life goes on (1989-1993)

i keep thinking he's the dad from life goes on

for whatever reason, the thumpers are what always captured my imagination. i think i just like the sounds.

paul: "Remember, walk without rhythm and we won't attract a worm. It will go to the thumper."

anyway, walk without rhythm and it won't attract the worm how did i not realize until this very moment that song was a reference to dune! haha. walk without rhythm is such a strange turn of phrase

tell me of your home world, usul!

also forgot the lusting after his nephew, sting. they really went all out making the harkonnens the most grotesque

baron: "A poison has been introduced into your body, Thufir Hawat. By milking this, this smooth little cat's body, you receive your antidote. It must be done each day."

i think this must be past the point when i usually fell asleep watching this. i know i've seen it all the way through more than once but apparently milking a cat???? didn't leave an impression. also this just never comes up again. but bro made it to the end of the movie so i guess he was successful in milking it

the truly unfortunate green screening is consistently the worst effect, a shame

reverend mother: "There is a place… terrifying to us, to women." paul: "This is the place they cannot look. Traveling without moving."

lol what. silly girls are afraid of teleportation 😔

pacing is all over the place. it was going okay but then paul's making out with chani, his sister is born and is like 8 years old now (heyo baby alicia witt), we gotta zoom through 2 years of war and boop boop now paul's drinking the blue water and going where no woman can go while they all bleed from their face parts

space cigarettes, no problem. but then they gotta go try to make this glowing golden thing and it's terrible

would be remiss to not include the dick shaped harkonnen ships but i ran out of images ;<

this big showdown with the emperor etc i am hanging on by a thread to not fall asleep/close :p truly lost the plot. way too much worm action, way too long of boring repetitive action sequences

using my image last slot for having the baby kill the baron/send him on his way to become a worm snack

LOL the pug is in this big fremen gathering! captain picard managed to survive and keep the dog alive! good god will this ever end. now we're gonna have the world's slowest knife fight with sting

and now it's raining somehow. sure

oh my god. that took forever. ok well, i can see why this movie has put me to sleep more than once and panned. and there's some really memorable and interesting things about it, and i think it goes fairly strong (with some issues like excessive voiceover) for the first 2/3 or so. but oof. i definitely liked it more 20 years ago :p anyway, i'm glad i watched it again so i could take off the rose tinted glasses before watching the new movies

[lepoppeta]

What would some of your favorite characters from other media be up to in the hazbin universe?

real talk but i turned the main characters from my bioshock au into helluva boss demons - ive been way too embarrassed about posting about it before, and also im afraid of the backlash of people getting snippy that im mixing fandoms like that (i remember the warrior cats fans got REALLY annoyed about people doing dream smp crossovers at the time when that was popular). that being said, i saw a bioshock x hazbin hotel crossover comic just the other day, so if they can do it, why cant i?

jack is a bird-like demon from the goetia family (i think i based him off of some sort of falcon), as are his parents (jasmine i depict as a swan, and andrew ryan is a rooster). atlas is an incubus, subject delta is a hellhound and sinclair is an imp. im not sure what the other characters would be - sofiya lamb i considered as another goetia family member (since shes identified as one of "raptures finest" in bioshock2) therefore making at least my version of eleanor a very strange hellhound-bird hybrid.

some elements of stolas actually inspired me to expand on jacks pov in the original au more, especially after "owl in a cage" / "stolas speaks" came out at the beginning of season two - this person with a lot of apparent power ("apparent" being the operative word here) who, due to immense emotional neglect and societal pressure, decided to indulge in their own selfish desires instead of doing something more useful. after regaining his memories, jack figures that his behaviour had been shallow due to his intense loneliness ("whats between you and i? just a comfortable lie") and he vows to make sure that his new family have his full effort to make up for his ignorance.

im not sure if events as they are in the bioshock au would transpire the exact same way as they would in the world of helluva boss, but its fun to think about how the story might change. for instance, with the inclusion of the little sisters, this would mean Super-tall Bird Demon Jack and his Medium-Sized Incubus Lover Atlas would end up adopting a gaggle of Teeny-tiny Itty Bitty Little Imp Girlies, which i think is beyond cute. i think delta in this instance would be hired muscle, and sinclair is his newest employer whos weirdly amiable with him.

[rockybloo]

What's your main ocs favorite food?

I don't have all the favorite foods figured out for everyone since I tend to completely forget that is a thing for characters sometimes, especially with how I like to yeet them into chaos for their stories SO I have like...a small handful to offer.

Jack loves sweets of any sort. Like...he really loves sweets. It's very concerning the lengths he will go for some sugar. Cookies, cakes, muffins, you name it and he'll gobble it down in seconds.

Nana loves hamburgers. The larger the burger-the happier she'll be.

Bitterbat loves fruit and frequently snacks on it when he's in itty bitty form because his smaller size makes fruit salads last longer. When he's not munching while tiny, he tends to not peel his fruit when he's full sized...which means he totally takes bites out of watermelons, bananas, and oranges with the skins till on as Sweetheart watches in silent digust.

Sourpuss, on the unhealthier hand, loves candy and tends to hoard whatever sweet treats they find. Their room is filled with candy and they frequently have little hiding spots so they can save pieces for later. They even have hiding spots in places they visit frequently like Sweetheart's apartment or Baby's bedroom. Expiration dates don't mean anything to them either. They've been known to eat decade old candy.

Baby is a weeb and loves ramen. Specifically the cups of it. She knows it's not as good as the real thing but she can't get enough of the taste. Her guilt pleasure is getting a packet of ramen and just munching on the noodle brick while dumping the seasoning powder into her mouth from time to time for flavor while binging anime.

Pluto loves oranges and orange flavored food. They also love whatever Nova makes for them. So if Nova makes some orange based meal-they'll be the happiest cyborg in the galaxy.

Nova likes seafood...which is very predictable due to her being a cat girl. Sushi is one of her fave types of dishes because she loves the flavors of critters of the sea when they are raw.

[thoughtsofthegirlwiththecurl]

Some Sentence Sunday

Thank you for the tag @cricketnationrise

I've been too slammed to write much recently, but I'm hoping to get back to this one soon (a Patater prompt from Boots).

It’s a stupid interaction; wizards obviously aren’t real, and the Cave of Wonders is just a tourist trap selling crystals and tarot cards. Kent should forget all about it. But every time Jack comes into Kit’s Palace to ogle Kent’s oblivious baker, it niggles in the back of his mind. Which is how, one week later, he finds himself leaving Bitty in charge of the cat cafe and skulking down to the Cave of Wonders three minutes before it’s due to close. The bell above the door chimes weakly as he pushes it open; the inside is atmospherically lit, warm and a little dim. Glass shelves holding crystals of various sizes line the walls; further in, dusty purple curtains herald the tarot section of the store. Despite the fact that it’s now two minutes until closing, Kent’s surprised to find it empty. Tourist scene might officially start June 1, but two weeks out, the town is already starting to feel crowded. Enough that Kent’s finally caved to Bitty’s badgering and agreed to interview a potential seasonal hire tomorrow.

An open tag for anyone writing; please tag me if you use it so I can see your wonderful words!

Also adding:

@freebooter4ever @appalamutte @omgpoindexter

@pendwick @ohyoufool @swaps55

[omgpoindexter]

my years of exposure to boys at university means i know for a FACT there is a haus minecraft server and i have thoughts about it:

nursey is absolutely useless at the game and spends 99% of his time taming cats and collecting flowers. he also plays it on his ipad

everything chowder builds looks like a 5 year old built it but if you challenge him to a fight you will lose. every single time

dex makes those overcomplicated villager trading markets for all the overpowered tools

ransom always goes on adventures 100000 miles away to collect resources and gets completely lost

holster dedicates all his time to making elaborate redstone contraptions. some of them are useful but most of them are not

shitty starts off as a pacifist and refuses to kill any of the animals - this slowly evolves into him building and running a fight-to-the-death tournament involving real life money

lardo is the annoying player that sets fire to people’s houses and builds traps to explode things

bitty refuses to play it - “i’m too pretty to play those games” - but he watches minecraft youtube videos and backseat plays over everybody else’s shoulders

somebody asks jack if he wants to join the server and he says “what’s minecraft?” and it’s genuinely not a joke. he’s never heard of it

the server is called MINEBROS because holster made it and refuses to change it even though the name sucks

[hullomoon]

hullomoon's 2023 works: part three

it’s the end of the year, which means it’s time for a work round-up! i had a pretty busy year so i didn't post as much, but i also know i did more longer works. so it probably balances out in the end. if you haven’t yet, check out my 2019 roundup, 2020 roundup, 2021 roundup, and 2022 roundup! all works are ordered in chronological posting order.

part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | part six

little light will guide them to me | Stranger Things | Eleven/Max | 1k

El always finds a way to be with Max

here kitty, kitty | Schitt's Creek | Patrick/Ted | 1.3k

Patrick didn't expect to find a cat or meet a hot vet

hold me like you'll never let me go | Check, Please! | Jack/Bitty, Bitty & Holster | 1.6k

Sometimes a neon orange puffer coat is not helpful

forget this fear and frustration | Stranger Things | Robin/Nancy | 849

Robin reflects on queerness and community

kiss full of color | Stranger Things | Robin/Chrissy/Nancy | 2k

Robin always worried about finding her soulmate. Then she met Nancy Wheeler and Chrissy Cunningham and worried a little more.

make me scream, make a scene | Stranger Things | Explicit | Robin/Vickie/Nancy/Barb/Heather/Chrissy | 508

Robin's just a twenty-something living her best life

why aren't you scared of me (why do you care for me) | Stranger Things | Explicit | Chrissy/Barb | 2.2k

Barb comes back and can't stand to be in Hawkins. She ends up meeting Chrissy

and all of it is yours and mine | Stranger Things | Joyce/Karen | 1.4k

Joyce reflects during a milestone

[podfic] Bacon, Egg, and Cheese on Sesame Bagel | Stranger Things | Steve & Robin | 01:45

November 1983: Robin Buckley is late for school.

[podfic] Welcome Aboard the Samwell | Check, Please! | Gen | 03:13

Larissa "Lardo" Duan was the greatest pirate captain of the seven seas. After defeating a Royal Naval ship in a battle at sea, she and her First Mate Bittle took two naval officers captive aboard the great ship Samwell.

[the-lincyclopedia]

Fic Rec Friday (on Saturday)

This week's theme: Rec a fic that starts with the same letter as your username (or, if you like, a part of your username)

The rules: Tag a fic that starts with the same letter as your username and describe why it's so good / how it has a hold on you. Then tag some people to see what everyone else is reading. Spread the love! Also, she'll do the round up on Sunday, so if you're still recc-ing on Saturday, no pressure! Please tag @welcometololaland or tag #fic rec friday so she can compile the masterlist.

Thanks to @cricketnationrise for the tag!

I went through my bookmarks and picked a LOT of fics whose titles start with T or L, so I’m inserting a cut so you don’t have to scroll past the whole thing. Also, I’m not tagging anyone to participate because Saturday is almost over.

tell me what it’s like (to be loved by you) - Check Please - by @likeshipsonthesea

Look, this fic has it all. Mutual pining? Comfortable friendship that neither of them wants to wreck? Co-parenting in the aforementioned dynamic? Check, check, check (please). The writing is gorgeous, also.

Life of the Party - Check Please - by penguinsledding

Another kid fic, this time featuring Jack and Lardo co-parenting a kid who resulted from a one-night stand they had right before Jack was supposed to be drafted. Bitty is the kid’s favorite YouTuber. This fic gives me so many feels.

the girl who lived (again) - Harry Potter - by @ink-splotch

I struggled with whether to include a Harry Potter fic in this list given . . . you know . . . but this is a beautiful interpretation of trans!Harry and makes the best case I’ve ever seen for why queer and trans young people need queer and trans role models, so I’m keeping it on the list.

Learned Our Lessons Well - Check Please - by @mcbangle

Shitty and Jack friendship so well-written that I wrote in my comment on it that I was happy-squealing. A great take on the ultimate brotp.

Land of Wishing Wells - Check Please - by @alexeiiimashkov

Patater fake dating at the Zimbits wedding. I have reread this fic SO many times. I’m a sucker for fanon Kent Parson, particularly when the writer gives him this much of an inferiority complex.

Love at the Juice Bar - Check Please - by orphan_account

The disability rep here makes me so happy! This fic features deaf!Jack and CODA!Bitty. It’s also just so cute, in general.

Three Points Where Two Lines Meet - Check Please - by @luckiedee

This fic has a two-person love triangle featuring Jack and Bitty falling for each other both at the grocery store and via email as Jack reads Bitty’s blog, without realizing that they’re the same people in both venues. And THEN Shitty and Lardo try to set them up. The TROPES. I love this one a lot.

The Kit-den Catfe - Check Please - by @justwritins

This writer is AMAZING at writing a Kent Parson who has been abused and is trying so hard to heal and figure things out. In this fic, Kent owns a cat cafe and Tater falls hard for him. Gosh, I want to reread this immediately.

The Placebo Effect - Check Please - by @doggernaut

Trope subversion alert! In this fic, Bitty and Jack fake being soulmates only to realize that they’re just as in love as they would be if it were predestined. I love when writers mess with the soulmate trope, and doggernaut is just so good.

That’s How the Light Gets In - Sherlock - by sylviarachel

This has been one of my all-time favorite fics for very nearly a decade now, which is utterly wild to realize, but it’s so deserved. This is an ace!Sherlock fic that helped me come to terms with my own asexuality, and my partner and I have been quoting it to each other since I read it to him a few weeks into our relationship. I don’t have words for how much this fic means to me.

[psychwardpup]

I'd love to know about what music you like! Music is very important to me, I'm curious to know if your music matches how you display yourself! I'd also like to know about your history with art- when did you start drawing and why? And also, where do you usually buy your clothes? Are you more of an online shopper or a real life shopper? Do you have any sort of product wishlist?

I'd love to know much more personal information as well, but I am sure you are not going to give up things like your childhood school or house away that easily! Feel free to share any facts about yourself you consider interesting or important that aren't on your carrd- there is so much I'd like to know!

- 👻

eee i love talking about myself okay :33

my favourite bands are : mother mother , imagine dragons , ic3peak , corpse , fall out boy , grlwood , mindless self indulgence , måneskin , everybody’s worries about owen , melanie martinez , billie eilish , jack stauber , los campesinos! , the clash , i don’t know how but they found me

i started when i was really young i think ! i illustrated little itty bitty novels about three stuffed animals i had and made up entire plots for them :3 im going to be an author one day and beat jk rowling 💪

i get my clothes from a lot of brands , and mostlyyyy online bc i don’t like leaving the house lol

i’m suddenly blanking on anything that could be important oh my goodness — i suppose that i really love animals ? i have two birds ! and two cats :} i love all of them so so much they r my babies <33 esp my orange fluffy cat he is literally my best friend /hsrs i cannot live without him

this turned into a really long posts HSHSHSHS i hope my answers satisfy you :3

[frogmanfae]

Newsies as Things I Heard This Week Part 3

Race, who decided to fuck around and take an intro to med course: Boogers, man *solemn nodding*

Literally everyone else who was having a normal conversation 2 seconds ago: ...

Race: They have a purpose

Davey: What's on your dress?

Romeo: Are those corn dogs?

Jack: They're popsicles!

Katherine: No!! They're otters!! You're like the third person! They're two otters swimming next to each other and holding hands because otters holding hands is the cutest thing ever!

Romeo: Ohhh I see it now

Katherine: I would wear a dress with corn dogs on it though, that sounds pretty cool

I'm gonna drop out

Spot: What happened

Race: Change my name

Spot: What happened??

Race: Move to another state-

Spot: What happened???

Davey: He was talking to his english teacher while she was trying to grade and she asked him to shut up

Race: MY ENGLISH TEACHER

Spot: ooh... That's rough buddy

Jojo: Uh... I think it's red?

Buttons: Damn that's a big apple!

Jojo: I know it's like huge-

Buttons: What kind is it??

Buttons and Elmer: ...

Elmer: *bursts into laughter*

Buttons: *gasping for air* I mean... Are we talkin gala, pink lady, honey crisp...?

Albert: Do you ever want to just start some chaos for no reason?

Jojo: Oh! Uh... *laughing but the crying kind* I don't know...

Race: Absolutely-

Albert: Because right now I just wanna- I'm fighting an urge

Elmer: *out of nowhere, directed at no one, for no reason* itty bitty titty committee

Race: What? Literally what did you just say?

Davey, running on an hour of sleep, three monster energies, and the crippling anxiety that if he takes a break he will have failed his entire family: It's like thing that there where like... What is that?

Davey: Where all the words are the same? Oxymoron!

Race, who isn't an english scholar but is pretty sure that isn't right: ...no?

Davey: Wh- *realization* ... Alliteration. I meant allitera-

Race: DID YOU JUST MISTAKE ALLITERATION FOR OXYMORON-

Race: NO BECAUSE YOU'RE A FUCKING OXY-MORON

Davey: SHUT UP

Crutchie: Were you on the marching band bus with the penis game last year?

Davey: THIS IS ANTISEMITISM AND HOMOPHOBIA AND- UH- fuck what see am I? I'm something else, for sure, right?

Race:.... An immigrant?

Davey: YEAH THIS IS ALSO XENOPHOBIA

Race: DID YOU JUST FORGET THAT YOU-

Davey: I SAID SHUT UP

Buttons: What?

Crutchie: The penis game

Buttons: No? Can I- I'm gonna need some elaboration

Crutchie: Okay so you say "penis" and you start really quiet and then the next person-

Buttons: Okay I understand. I need no more instruction, I know what to do now. I'm so glad I've been given the honor to bring this to Bus 1

Denton, addressing the marching band kids on expectations before they leave for their first away game of the season: Did I cover everything? Is everything said?

Medda: Language!

Denton, very obviously tired: Oh yes! Language. Only use the good words, not the bad ones. Like... Yay and... Yippee.. Oh darn... Holy smokes... Things like that...

Romeo: The trombone section shirt is going to say "I'm about to blow" and it's gonna have a trombone with a bomb

Henry: Why the bomb?

Romeo: So people think we're talking about explosions but actually... Cum

Henry: I mean the trumpet shirts say "I'm horny" so-

Romeo: RIGHT?! THAT'S WEIRD! If they can have that we can have this.

Elmer: Please don't quote me on that

Buttons: I'm quoting you on that

Elmer: Nooo...!

Denton: *chainsaw imitation in the middle of teaching class*

Davey and Spot: *autistic discussion about angler fish* (I wasn't able to write all of this down because deadass this conversation about angler fish lasted 20 minutes in the middle of my creative writing class instead of doing our work)

Elmer: *tricks his cat into thinking he has a treat when he, in fact, does not* Look he's looking at me like "you whore I knew you were lying"

Denton, teaching biology: This is called phagocytosis (fag-oh-sigh-toe-sis)

Davey and Race: *bombastic side eye*

Crutchie: *trying not to laugh*

Denton: It occurs when a phagocyte (fag-oh-sight) essentially, like- *eats* another piece of biological material in the body-

Davey and Race: *BOMBASTIC SIDE EYE*

Crutchie: *TRYING NOT TO LAUGH*

Medda, to her english class: Oh don't read that that's hetero

Les: you just use your tippies *talking about fingertips*

Davey: ... *trying so hard not to laugh*

Davey: I'm gonna touch you with my tippies

Race: *trying and failing not to laugh*

/after Les leaves/

Race: PLEASE GO UP TO JACK AND SAY THAT

Albert: *gets his heart broken by a guy* I'm straight now!

Henry: No!

Albert: I'm taking the rainbow heart pin off of my bag right now!!!

Race: I support you, I'm shopping for a straight pride pin to replace it

Elmer: Relationships are give and take, lately you've only been giving and he's only been taking you should really end that

Albert: thank you! A true friend

Race: here, here's an ally pin-

Albert: no I'm straight up homophobic after this

Race: oh shit

Crutchie: Damn okay look at you getting deep, freshman??

*long line to get in through a door*

Buttons: *opens a second door*

Denton: Oh there we go, second option. Always use plan b!

Jack: *snorts*

Davey: *side eye*

Race: *deep voice* get off my property

Race: You should keep that one in mind

Davey: I'm having a hard time seeing what I could use Plan B for

Jack: It's so weird to hear you using your straight guy voice

Race: *southern deep voice* oh yeah-

Davey: WHY ARE YOU SOUTHERN???

Race: *still in the voice* I was born in South Carolina

Jack: THAT DOESN'T COUNT

Race: *still in the voice* In another life I coulda been a cowboy

Buttons, about Oscar: Nah girl that is more than a bad day that's a bad YEAR-

Spot, sarcastically: It's governMENt not governWOMANt so sit down

Denton, teaching a band class: It's like your tongue is ever so slightly flicking the note-

Sarah, jokingly: :0

Davey, also a drummer: *trying (and failing) not to laugh* shut up

Spot, a drummer and therefore not a part of the tongue flicking thing: *starts laughing*

Specs: It's like we're a travelling truffle of elephants-

Romeo: Is that-

Specs: Yes that's the right term

Denton, about a halftime peice: No no it can't be that

The entire band: ah- pff- uh-

Denton: i's not funny anymore now it's just sad

Race: Alright I'm going to the bathroom so no funny conversations while I'm gone

*2 minutes later the book falls*

Race: Everyone point and laugh at her because her book is slowly falling off her desk

Davey: It's not that funny

Davey: *snorts*

Elmer: You have a cartoon character frown

Race:

Davey: shut up

Davey: What

Elmer: Like your frown is cartoony

Davey: I dropped ap chem

Jack: What?

Davey: I'm taking ceramics now

Jack: You-

Davey: I dropped chemistry for ceramics

Jack: You're so real for that

Albert: AH- You did not just L my jeans that are black!

Elmer: Okay but why would you have edibles if you could just have gummies

Jack, who has never actually done drugs of any kind in his life: I mean like drugs tho

Elmer: Okay but would you rather have a bowl of fruit gummies or like 3 edibles

Jack: But-

Elmer: Infinite fruit gummies or-

Buttons: We should give birds space suits and just send them up there

Davey: Huh?

Race: I'd get arrested if I was a politician

Buttons: See if they would fly without air

Davey: I feel like you aren't thinking any of this through

Romeo: Aren't the best politicians attested at some point? (/sarcastic)

[bookgeekgrrl]

My media this week (12-18 Feb 2023)

📚 STUFF I READ 📚

😊 "List of People Who Disappeared Mysteriously at Sea" (Jen Myers) - nicely eerie short story

😊 In The Market For Murder (Lady Hardcastle Mysteries #2) (T.E. Kinsey, author; Elizabeth Knowelden, narrator) - again, I'm a fan of the breezy 'not-super-serious-about-historical-accuracy-in-the-small-details' tone; I really like that Flo & Lady H have this backstory/history that we only find small bits about here and there

😍 Same As It Ever Was (QuokkaFoxtrot) - 62K, Steddie - EXCELLENT time-loop fixit AU

🥰 Cabin Pressure - Series 1: Abu Dhabi to Fitton (John Finnemore, author; Stephanie Cole/Roger Allam/Benedict Cumberbatch/John Finnemore, voice cast) - entertained again by the crew of MJN Airlines

😍 Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Steve a Match (BlueSimplicity) - 209K, shrunkyclunks - omegaverse (but fairly nontrad, no mpreg) - the slow burn tag is not inappropriate but also it kind of doesn't FEEL that slow! deep worldbuilding, excellent epistolary component, incredible OC's, the differences/subversions of trad omegaverse tropes gave me clowfish AU vibes, which I loved

😍 Will Wonders Never Cease (PorcupineGirl) - 56K, zimbits AU, You've Got Mail/She Loves Me fusion - magic's real, Bitty's a tech witch with a very cute familiar - read this in one sitting and my face hurt when I was done from smiling so much

🥰 Luke and Billy Finally Get a Clue (Cat Sebastian) - novella, set in 1953; to paraphrase the official description: two best friend pro ball players finally figure their shit out, featuring: inclement weather, only one (real) bed and some hurt/comfort. Technically this is set in the Cabot Universe but there are zero Cabots in this one. Cat continues to score home runs on vibes alone. I love her books so, so much!

💖💖 +189K of shorter fic so shout out to these I really loved��💖💖

I Want You to Find Me (PorcupineGirl) - Check Please!: zimbits, 23K - canon-divergent AU where Bitty's a camboy that catches Jack's attention (while also still being his former teammate and all)

Ruin me (rainbow_nerds) - Stranger Things: steddie, 11K - absolutely cannot get enough of a reunion/2nd chance fic!!!!! fluffy AF!

Critical Feline Mass (Kryptaria, zooeyscigar) - MCU: stucky, 39K - no-powers AU where they're both retired military, Steve rents an apt to a still-struggling-to-reintegrate Bucky & sparks (and feelings) fly. also there are a lot of adorable kittens.

📺 STUFF I WATCHED 📺

Tom Scott & Gavin Free - "We tried the Hot Ones sauces. It was painful."

Queer Historical Romance panel with KJ Charles, AL Lester & Lex Croucher presented by The Portal Bookshop

Poker Face - s1, e5-7

Our Flag Means Death - s1, e8-10

🎧 PODCASTS 🎧

⭐ Vibe Check - NFL = National Fenty League

Digital Folklore - Monsters and Mental Healthcare - Vivian Asimos & Kathleen Hale

The Sporkful - Alan And Arlene Alda Bonded Over A Fallen Rum Cake

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - The Henry Miller Memorial Library

You Must Remember This - 1984: "Vioporn," Body Double and Crimes of Passion (Erotic 80s Part 7)

Switched on Pop - “Flowers” and the art of the response song

Digital Folklore - Hidden Meanings (Haunted Videogames, ARGs, & Folk Groups)

Strange Customs - Katie Lowes and Adam Shapiro—The Rock

It's Been a Minute - Unlocking desire through smut; plus, the gospel of bell hooks

⭐ Vibe Check - There’s Dog Years, and Then There’s Queer Years

ICYMI Plus - The Internet’s Black Emo Renaissance

99% Invisible #525 - The Chinatown Punk Wars

⭐ Fated Mates - S05.22: Trailblazer K.J. Charles

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Pushkin’s Duel

Welcome to Night Vale #222 - Makarov the Magical

Shedunnit - Bonus: Tana French on Josephine Tey

Fated Mates - S05.14: Band Sinister by KJ Charles

Writing Excuses - 18.07: Deep Dive into THE SPARE MAN

The Atlas Obscura Podcast - Cactoblastis Memorial Cairn

Writing Excuses - 18.05: An Interview with Mary Robinette Kowal

Ologies - Melaninology (SKIN/HAIR PIGMENT) with Tina Lasisi

You Must Remember This - 1985: Fear Sex. Jagged Edge & AIDS (Erotic 80s Part 8)

Endless Thread - The Journeys of Two Russian Anti-War YouTubers

Strong Songs - From Bach to Miles Davis, with Emily Reese

You're Dead To Me - Early Medieval Papacy

It's Been a Minute - Kelela's guide for breaking up with men

Dear Prudence - My Partner Might Be in Conversion Therapy. Help!

🎶 MUSIC 🎶

Rihanna

The Celtic Spirit

my 'Thumbs Up' playlist

Tropical Dance Pop

Hi-Scores

[marvus-xoloto]

can't stop thinking about Auriel and his moirail, Nawali. I make a lot of girl OCs, so it's fun to make some guys. Basic info under the cut for my own future reference, and for any interested <3

Auriel Anonymous (caste name unknown... to us ;o) hehe). He/him and gay.

Sign: LECER, sign of the loyalist (olive+blood+prospit)

Lusus: big fat tom catcoon (british short hair cat/raccoon; roundest motherfucker you ever did see.) His names is literally just Tom.

Strife specibus: idk yet ^^ I've been thinking curtaincall!kind where he just. Smothers you with red velvet curtains lmfao.

God tier: heir of blood

Land: Land of Mirrors and Velvet

Hobbies: owns a coffee shop (for the gossip, but also bc he loves to bake); theatre kid (loves troll shakespeare)

Job: professional impersonator; works with reconaissance

Quirk: terrible, forced cat puns, glitched text every 23 words.

Basic appearance: 5'9 and fat. I hc him to look like a combo between Jack Black and Harvey Guilen. Curly haired like a roman. Wears tiny little spectacles and a generally smug but friendly face. Mimics your facial expressions as you speak (unconscious habit). Horns... hmm. The lesft on is like two kitty ears and the right one is like a curious kitty tail, sharpened to a point.

Nawali Amanis, transmasc he/they mlm.

Sign: SCORITTARIUS, sign of the doubtful (cerulean+void+derse)

Lusus: Little bitty mantis *shrug* he's named for the amantis nawai, which is a teeny tiny mantis species. He's very affectionate but so vulnerable to being stepped on, and needs to eat a lot of moths.

Strife specibus: scythe!kind

God tier: mage of void

Land: Land of flickering candles and windchimes

Hobbies: strings up a bunch of glass lanterns in the woods around his hive to capture moths for his lusus (he collects and pins them; the ones he's collected before are dinner for his lusus); makes fancy little terrariums; hybridizes poisonous plants and breeds venomous insects.

Job: works on the black market supplying drugs (to cure or to kill, makes no difference to him unless he's on a downswing); also supplies fancy terrariums to indigo and violet bloods (uses this as a way to get Auriel in to their hives).

Quirk: Talks pretty. Haltingly. Concisely. Carefully. Uses few words. Proper grammar. !!UN LESS!! !!HESD ON AN!! !!UPSIWGN!! or.... on a downswing.......

Basic appearance: 6'1 and slender. Honestly he looks like David Chiang (the model) in my head: very striking and delicate looking. Horns look like his sign. Wears eccintric, wizard-style clothing in bold prints. Always barefoot; his floors in his hive are filthy.

[omgzineplease]

Fast Facts:

What you do: I'm a writer, artist, and an admin of the zine!

When you joined the fandom: Sometime after the end of year 2, but I'm not entirely sure when exactly? It's been a WHILE though I know that much

Things you like outside the fandom: I love Good Omens, reading any book I can get my hands on, and real life hockey!

About Me: Hey, y'all! I go by either Z or Sidney (he/they mainly but any work tbh), I'm 21, queer, Jewish, and obsessed with NHL player Bitty. It's become the main thing I write and there's no end in sight for the ideas I have for it haha

I spend a lot of my free time crocheting and baking, but I also sew and draw/paint. I'm also a hiker, and I'm working to make hiking more accessible for disabled folks like myself in my area!

I got into Check Please because I saw Bitty was gay and southern like me and his story hit close to home, but I had absolutely no interest in hockey. Here we are now, and I relate more to Jack and hockey has become my favorite sport!

My favorite character bounces between Jack and Bitty on any given day, but I have a special place in my heart for Tater and Alicia as well <3

Fun facts:

Every mentioned (and some just pictured) recipe that's appeared in Check Please, aside from the jams, I've made

In doing the above, I made my own sugar crusted maple apple pie recipe bc I couldn't find one I liked

I have several fish, two dogs, and a cat

I collect vintage and antique sewing machines

Things I Think Would Be Cool in the Zine

polyfrogs and polyfarms all the way love them

literally anything lardo centric

love to any and all side/background characters, real or collective figments of our imaginations

tater content my beloved <333

also dex

and shitty

and alicia

ok im done LOL

[panie-wanie-dean-bean]

... Admittedly I think they'll be fine since I hate lab-related stuff too - not getting into that lol. I already have a lot of those things in my own home because they are just super comforting.

Only thing is I'll have to make a locked sewing room with warnings for them about needles so they can know before accidentally going in and avoiding triggers. Also can set up a safe space they can go outside as they please too. I seen some cat owners go that route and fresh air and sunshine can do some good when you've been locked up in a sterilized mess like a lab for too damn long.

Aww, little bitty condo!

They all love they're new clothes but they're all very grateful that you have a room where all the sharp needle stay

They would all love the option to get some fresh air! The way I'm imagining it is like a windowsill flower bed but it's like a little platform with some railings on it. Every morning Jack and Rory have a little exorcise hour where they stretch and run around and meditate a little in the morning sun. You'll have to put a little cap full of sunscreen by the entrance so Jack doesn't get sun burned