#but i was either too young or doing it on purpose to push others away

[alex-the-bringer-of-chaos]

Gosh the new messy state (always been complicated, the motive is just different) that my relationship with my parents has entered a few months ago has finally decided to combine with the patterns of behavior and paranoia that became the pattern of thought and behavior from my childhood and teenage hood, and now I've been stuck for over a month in the same old cycle of self sabotage with the added factor of anxiety and fear that makes me terrified of taking an action and fucking things up.

And like, who am I gonna tell this shit? This happens all the time, the motives just change. So really, whose even gonna want to hear me talk about the same old shit of how I feel frozen and terrified of acting the wrong way, just because the motive is different. People have it worse and still can act, but no, Alex is always getting stuck in their head, he's always terrified of fucking it up on accident so she goes and fucks it up on purpose or does nothing in an attempt of making people leave. Cause that's what they deserve. Fucking hell I was a kid when I made one stupid decision towards myself and this is the outcome. What the fuck man?!?

[hells-wasabii]

here’s a thing you could try doing (if you want to) the Hazbin hotel gang with seraphim child reader who somehow appeared in hell after the ep 8 battle.

the gang now has to look and protect this child since others could use them for their own means with the power the kid has and for some reason they can’t go to heaven… almost like they have a purpose here in hell

A/N: This is probably going to get a part 2, I'm a little invested in where this could go! It's probably gonna get turned into a little series with a plot.

With a child seraphim i really don't see one knowing what hell even is yet. Sure, they would tell them about it, but definitely wouldn't know what it is. Or alcohol, or curse words or anything vulgar really. I hope you enjoy!

Character: General

Type: Fic (Nonromantic, Plot-centric,Hotel staff/residents with seraphim child!reader, General)

It was an honest mistake. You really hadn't meant to, but Emily and Sera were starting to argue again, something that had been happening often since that nice Charlie girl you had met at the zoo came and gone. So you had snuck away. You hated when they argued, they were your family. Family shouldn't fight, ever, you had decided early on.

Curious, you continue on towards the portal. You investigated, peering through to see a strange place bathed in red, you saw a broken building, something that reminded you of something one your brothers had shown you from the human world. War, you thought it was called. Something horrible that humans thought up to hurt each other.

You hated when people were hurt. You wanted to get closer and help anyone who might be hurt, even if your powers hadn't fully come in yet.

Then an idea came to your mind! You could ask your brothers to help! They would know exactly what to do! With this in mind, you attempted to return back through the portal, only to be pushed back by some invisible force.

Wait... What? Why wouldn't it let you back in?

Then it happened. You were still a young Seraphim, your wings weren't super strong yet, and as you peered down at the red place your wings gave out. Luckily, your brothers and sisters had trained you in case something like that happened! You were able to slow your descent, at least enough for it not to hurt when you finally landed.

So you started to make your way to the pretty, large building on the hill with a sign that read Hazbin Hotel. Though the building didn't seem quite finished yet, it was still really pretty. Odd, hadn't it just been all broken?

As you pushed your way in through the heavy doors, you saw three people over at a tall counter: A cat man with wings cleaning a really small glass, an angel, but she didn't have her wings out, and- Oh no! She seemed to have misplaced her halo, too! That wasn't good! And a pretty pink and white spider-man that was sipping on a pretty looking juice

The pretty spider-man looked over at you and did a spit-take, nearly choking on his juice.

"What the fuck is a kid doing here?" He exclaimed, gesturing at you, fuck? What kind of word was that? No one had taught it to you, and you couldn't remember any of your fellow Seraphim using such a word, either. This seemed to get the other two's attention as they turned to look at you, shocked expressions on their faces.

"What does 'fuck' mean?" You asked, head tilted in confusion looking between each of the strangers. The pretty spider-man looked like he was going to start laughing but the angel next to him hit him hard in the shoulder, only serving to confuse you more.

"Charlie!" Excited, you ran forward, using your wings to jump higher than you would have otherwise, right into her arms. The blonde non-angel caught you with ease.

The princess of hell's eyes widened looking up to find her companions looking just as confused and shocked as she felt.

This wasn't good, not one bit.

[meowmeowriley]

Unhinged and unnecessary HC to rationalize the punk Ghost skin incoming!

It's not Ghost. Ta da! Listen. Listen. I understand. Ghost, being someone devoted to the crown, wouldn't wear the anarchy symbol. And if given the comic backstory (as I always will) Ghost most likely would hate punk music because of his father.

So why punk Ghost? It's not Ghost. It's his son. His and Johnny's. Maybe he's blood, maybe not. Doesn't really matter. They raised the boy. He's theirs. And he resents the crown and the military for how it broke his fathers. Maybe he lost them both, either together or at different times. Maybe they died in the field, or in the hospital due to complications from an injury they got on the job. Maybe they didn't even die, they were injured and dismissed and tossed aside like trash. Whatever the reason, he's angry.

So he joins up with some men who stand for everything his fathers didn't. Fuck their militaristic peace bullshit. It starts small, protests and parties mostly. But then as he finds himself getting closer with the others, he's asked to take part in some extracurriculars. Raids on police and military caravans. Harmless, he tells himself. Good even, they're preventing those in power from enforcing their tyranny, he rationalizes. Things get more radical the longer he's in. Things escalate. He's in too deep. They're a resistance group. They fight back. He looks back on the combat training his fathers pushed on him at a young age more fondly now, as it served him and his purposes well.

He doesn't see how he's exactly like his fathers, won't let himself. But he is. Just a man who follows orders and fights tooth and nail. But he does love his fathers. He misses them. He takes up Simon's mask and Johnny's hairstyle, incorporates them into his look. Makes them his own. An attempt to honor them, despite their different stances on how to do good.

A mission, he's stopped hating when they're referred to as missions a while ago, has himself and his team breaking into a military research facility to investigate and destroy what they found. A new weapon to hurt innocent people, he was sure. Except it wasn't, exactly.

Teleportation? Couldn't be real. He read the files with an air of disbelief. He was distracted, rookie mistake, a scientist gave him a shove, he fell into the teleporter. The man shouted something about finally having a human test subject and slapped his hand down on a button. A flash of blinding light enveloped him, and suddenly he found himself in a hallway. Disoriented, he walked about, trying to figure out where he was.

A man in a bucket hat rounded the corner ahead of him and stopped, looking him up and down with an exasperated sigh. "Ghost what the fuck are you wearing this time?" Ghost. His dad's callsign. This man thought he was his dad. What would his dad do in this situation.

He narrowed his eyes and crossed his arms. That should do it. Thankfully his sleeves were down covering his tattoos. They were different from Simon's and could've given him away.

"Whatever. Come on then." The man kept walking and he did his best to imitate Simon's walk. His mind raced, an obvious military man thought he was his own dad was worrisome, as the old man was gone, and he needed to get away without arousing suspicion. He'd have to play along then.

That plan went tits up the second he followed the bucket hat man into a room and found himself face to face with his fathers. His fathers who were able bodied and young, same age as himself.

The teleporter hadn't just sent him somewhere else, but had sent him back in time as well.

Johnny roughly ripped off his mask and slammed him against the wall. "Who the FUCK are you?!" Simon menacingly slid a knife out of his sleeve and deftly twirled it around his fingers. Right. They weren't his dads yet, just the crowns attack dogs.

[shino-mina-324]

Don’t Leave Me Too

Pairing: platonic!yandere! Muichiro x mother figure! reader

GN!

Summary: You care for him like a son and treated like so, but he was darker than you thought her was. How far will you get before he finds you after escaping the estate?

Warning: blood, kidnapping, clingy Muichiro, trauma, abandonment issues, etc

A/N: Believe it or not but this is actually my first time writing yandere! I don't think its entirely good but I'm pretty proud of it for my first try. I hope you all like it, please give me your feedback!

You stumbled through the snow, shivering at the stinging cold. How long have you been trapped in there? You couldn’t tell. Your feet felt like they were going to freeze off, after all you were barefoot. You didn’t have time to go grab shoes when your escape was right there.

How did you even get into this situation? You squeezed your eyes shut at the memories.

You had met him during a mission. You were assigned to work with a hashira in this mission, apparently strong enough to need a hashira and one other but not enough to require two hashira. You were nervous, so nervous. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself in front of a hashira! But then you saw him, a short boy with long hair. He looked no older than fourteen. It had always broke your heart how such young kids were becoming demon slayers and what they go through. But to see a fourteen year old having gone through that and train hard enough to become a hashira so quickly just made it worse.

You didn’t let that show though, either way he was still your superior. In the down moments when you weren’t actively working you'd talk to him in a kind motherly manner, not in a belittling way but in a sweet way. He would look at you with a tilted head and sometimes narrowed eyes, annoyed maybe, but wouldn’t say anything. But when working you would treat him like any other superior.

Then after the mission was over you decided to get some breakfast and invited him as well. He accepted but didn’t talk much. Then you went your separate ways. But then you got another mission with him, then another, and another. Every time you would treat him the same way. Once you even gave him a head pat, you didn’t do it on purpose. Your hand kinda moved before you could think about it.

“Don’t touch me.” He gave you the coldest glare you had ever felt. You felt immediate shame fill your body and soon excused yourself. You never tried that again after that. Always kept your distance too, in case of accidentally touching him while walking. He didn’t seem to notice, if anything he seemed more pleased.

Then he went on a mission somewhere else. Not unusual. But the next time you saw him he was… different. His eyes were more clear and when he saw you a smile immediately crossed his face and he ran towards you. He wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a tight hug, his face in your neck. You tensed at the contact, not used to it coming from him.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry I treated you like that.” He kept repeating, talking into your neck. Slowly, cautiously, you wrapped your arms around him loosely. But that’s all. He melted into it further though, like it meant the world to him.

After that you would see each other a lot more often. For some reason every mission you had was with him. He would also stay quite close to you as well. There was one time when you two were just sitting around a table he had grabbed your hand and put it on his head. You were confused but he looked at you expectantly but when you didn’t do anything he frowned and pushed it on to his head a bit harder. You realized, and although very confused, starting to pat his head. He seemed content but grabbed you hand when you tried to pull away.

It was sweet. The relationship the two of you had now, like mother and son. But then it took a turn. He would barely let you fight the demons you fought. Always jumping in and killing them before you. It was sweet at first but then got frustrating. Then after that he insisted on being next to you everywhere, even when not on missions. But compared to other things, those were more innocent.

He started trying to take up all your time, always wanting to be around you. He would also seem standoffish and be flat out rude to your other friends. Soon for some odd reason they started to distance themselves. But he was always there to cheer you up, you realized too late that he was the reason why they got distant.

Then for some odd reason you started getting missions less and less. This confused you but you didn't question it much. Then one day Muichiro invited you over to his estate. This wasn't an odd thing as he had done that numerous times before. But at the end of the night he insisted you stay the night and after a little fighting you agreed. That's where you went wrong. He didn't let you leave the next day or the next. You got frustrated and decided to just leave. If he caught you on the way out then so bad you'd just force your way out, no big deal. Yeah, you were wrong. He caught you on the way out, as if he were guarding the door. He refused to move and when you forced your way past him he let you. You made it a total of five steps out the door before you felt something hit the back of your neck and you passed out. All you heard were Muichiro's six words.

"I can't lose you too, mom."

You shook your head harshly pushing away the memories. You were so stupid. He may be a child but he was a damn Hashira! You should never have gotten close to him, never invited him to meals, never talked to him about anything not work related, you were so damn stupid! You shook your head at those thoughts. It was too late now, all you can do is keep running.

You kept running down the path then stopped. No this was too dangerous, what if he started walking down the same path and saw you? You made a sharp turn and ran into the forest. It was more dangerous and the roots, twigs, and rocks hurt your feet but it was safer in its own way. You kept running, ignoring the pain, ignoring the wind, ignoring the noises, ignoring your tired muscles that screamed at you to rest, ignored everything. Even ignored the trail of blood you left that was created by your bleeding cut up feet.

You then stopped and jumped behind a tree, crouching. You could've sworn you heard footsteps. You waited in tense silence for a few seconds, listening for the footsteps but when none passed you started to stand back up. You froze again though when you heard them again. Along with a sickeningly familiar voice.

"Mom? Where are you? Come on, I know you're hurt, just come out." You fell back against the tree and stuck a hand against your mouth to quiet any noises. You looked down at yourself, trying to figure out why he said you were hurt when you saw your bleeding feet. Shit. It's been leaving a trail right to you. You couldn't move. If you stood on your feet it'd just leave a trail, but if you tried to crawl away it'd make too much noise and you'd be more noticeable. You're stuck.

Tears filled your eyes at the realization, what were you going to do? You couldn't go back to that estate, playing house. Forced to be affectionate and treat him like your child. You started hyperventilating, having a panic attack.

"Why are you crying?" You gasped and scrambled back on instinct, trying to create distance between you and the boy and appeared right nest to you. His eyebrows furrowed and he easily pulled you back. He held your face tightly with both hands, refusing to let go no matter how much you pulled your head back, he just kept it in place. "Don't cry, mama." He spoke softly but you kept gasping for breath and trying to pull away. He frowned. "This might hurt, sorry." Then you blacked out.

~

When you came to you were laying on something soft with a heaviness on your side and chest. You blinked and realized you were lying back in your futon at the Tokito estate. You moved your head to the side and saw Muichiro laying next to you, closely tucked to your side with his arm and head resting on your chest. He was also staring right at you.

"Your awake!" He smiled brightly at you but you could only feel a deepening pit in your stomach coming from the smile that once brought you so much joy in seeing. "Your feet were bleeding so I bandaged them up. You shouldn’t run off like that mom! Not even half an hour and you already got hurt, they could’ve gotten infected.” Muichiro said but his smile then faded and a cold look crossed his face. “Now on that topic, why’d you run, ma?” You shook slightly at his icy look but his words filled you with disgust. A sudden flash of confidence filled you.

“You know exactly why I ran, Tokito.” I glared at him harshly and pushed myself away from him, trying to create some distance. But I then stopped when I felt a restriction on my foot. He tied my foot to the ground with a rope. “What the hell, Tokito!” I yelled at him again.

“Stop calling me that." My blood froze when I met his eyes, they were void of any emotion and it was terrifying. "I told you to call me Muichiro." He pulled me in closer. "And you're not leaving. I'm not losing you too." His face then softened and he climbed on top of me, hugging me tightly and nuzzled his face into my neck like a baby kitten nuzzles into its mother.

"Don't leave me too, mom."

[gatorbites-imagines]

Dick grayson x male reader (preferably YJ verse)

Reader is Clark's bio son and their both hopelessly in love but reader is scared of dicks dating history and how close he's with all his exes and he doesn't want to get burned in the process

Dick Grayson x kryptonian male reader

Headcanons

Featuring some of my kryptonian headcanons.

You and Dick would be close even before the young justice team was made, since Bruce and Clark worked side by side so much as you were growing up. That results in you two knowing each other pretty well.

You would both be crushing on one another, but neither of you would confess or think the other feels the same way. Dick would the one to go off and date other people whilst you just stayed single and nursed what you thought was your one-sided crush.

Clark would have realized very early on how you were feeling for Dick, and he would tease you good naturedly about how you keep purring when your around him, saying its good he cant hear those frequencies or dick would have known immediately too.

You bring kryptonian makes you one of the team’s power houses, since you pack a major punch and other very strong powers. This results in you also looking out for a lot of the other team members just in case.

You’ve taken many hits for Dick over the years, since you on instinct keep a closer eye on him than everyone else. It’s not on purpose, you just do.

When Conner shows up, you don’t turn him away like others and treat him like a fellow kryptonian even if your dad is having some issues with being cloned. You don’t blame Conner for being created, and you just want to help out.

This leads to you and Conner getting close, and you teaching him about the weird quirks that come with being part Kryptonian. He almost exposes you when he asks why you purr so much around Dick, but you quickly shut him up.

Pretty much everyone can tell Dick is just as head over heels for you in return, it’s probably why some of his past relationships ended. I could imagine his partners realizing he was pining hard for you, which lead to a breakup for the most part.

Dick would think you don’t want a relationship in general since you’ve never been in a relationship with anyone, but everyone knows its because you pine after him too.

You two circling eachother like a pair of peacocks has been the cause of many tired conversations between your dads or your teammates. Bruce and Clark have known for years that you two like each other, but they also don’t want to push either of you to confess if you arent ready.

Your teammates have bets on how long its gonna take, Roy is the winner right now, since the bet was made years ago and he bet it would take you guys years, whilst the others said months or a year max.

You guys “hang out” all the time, but its very much just dates without you guys admitting it is. Like going out to eat together, going to the movies, or you flying around with him in your arms just for fun.

You guys end up kissing when you’ve been hit with a pretty strong dose of kryptonite, and you were loopy and weak. You weren’t sure you would make it out, so you kiss him.

Of course, you survive, and try to ignore that anything actually happened since you still think he doesn’t like you in return, and you fear you might have ruined your friendship.

It doesn’t help that all his exes are so attractive and skilled that it makes you insecure. Dick isn’t doing well with you avoiding him, as you go as far as using your super hearing to avoid him.

It ends up being Wally or Conner who explains to Dick that you feel insecure and like you won’t be able to meet his standards, which Dick doesn’t understand because he thinks your so far out of his league.

He would want to talk to you, but again, you’re avoiding him. Dick ends up getting the help from teammates and probably even Clark as you can’t outfly your dad like you can some of the others.

Finally, you two get to talk it all through, tears or shed, both sad tears and happy tears. You both feel so stupid cuz you’ve liked each other for years, but neither of you realized or confessed.

It takes a while after you start dating for you not to feel insecure or like you can’t meet some invisible standard, but Dick being so insanely smitten as he is helps quite a lot.

Your teammates have definitely joked that Dick would kiss the very ground you walk on if you asked, not that you wouldn’t do the same though.

You two are so cute together its almost sickening honestly. Always near eachother, holding hands, cuddling, kissing. The amount of flirting you do over comms now that you are together is unbelievable.

You’re very happy, though the insecurity does pop up at times. Your families and friends are happy you two finally confessed too. And Roy won the bet and became a richer man.

[chosobeee]

𝚆𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝙷𝚊𝚟𝚎 𝚃𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝙸𝚜𝚜𝚞𝚎𝚜 ♡

I had a real itchin' for this one. All my favs in one post, let's goooo!

Pairings: Satoru Gojo, Suguru Geto, Yuji Itadori, Megumi Fushiguro, Toji Fushiguro x GN!Reader (Separately)

Word Count: ~2.3k

Warnings: fluff, fluff, and more fluff. Trust issues, anxiety (of all kinds), implied trauma, Toji being a little pushy.

Enjoy! xx

Satoru Gojo: Patient & Bold

- Raising Megumi from a young age, he’s well versed in how difficult it is to get someone to fully trust another. But he’s determined to prove his worth to you. 

- Whether it be from bad past relationships, family issues, or other traumatic instances, Gojo fully listens when you voice your concerns to him. 

- This doesn’t stop him from flirting, though. And hard. 

- I mean, what else would he do if he didn’t make you a flustered, blubbering mess? 

- He mixes his compassion with constant praises and compliments, careful not to lovebomb you. He doesn’t want you to feel pressured, but he’ll be damned if you get your heart stolen by someone else. 

- Gotta keep you on your toes.

- Once he’s finally got a foot in the door, prepare to have a boyfriend. He won’t act like anything less. This is huge for him.

- He’ll buy you gifts, take you on “non-dates”, as he likes to call them. He’ll come over for movie nights, listen to your anxious rambling and offer support, make your comfort a top priority, and constantly remind you of your own worth (without being asked). 

- He will bring you around his friends, proudly, and doesn’t hide his feelings for you in front of them either. He’s not embarrassed by you, and he doesn’t want to control you or push you into a dark corner. He just wants to shower you in the love you damn well deserve. 

- The relationship kinda develops from there. You don’t even have to have an “official” conversation, it just happens. 

- However, if you want to have a discussion about what you two are to each other, he’ll give you a warm smile and tell you just how much he loves you. Bro probably has a monologue prepared, just for this moment.

“Aww, you’re blushing! I love that look on you~”

“Sweetie you’re shaking… do you want me to hold your hand?”

“Why would I be embarrassed of you? I love you.”

“You look so cute when you’re flustered.”

“How dare you not answer my emergency phone call? I needed to say ‘I love you.’”

Suguru Geto: Empathetic & Compassionate

- He himself has dealt with trust issues many times before, so he can understand where you’re coming from. Not to mention you’re like royalty to him, so how could he disrespect your feelings in such a manner?

- He doesn’t stop his advances by any means, but he does slow down considerably. 

- He decides it’s best to show you how much he cares, rather than pulling back and pretending he doesn’t care at all.

- If you ever express your discomfort with something, he’ll give you his full attention and actually listen to you. Whatever it is you need him to stop or pull back on, he will. He can find other ways to woo you, he’s certain. He’s not worried. 

- His flirting is subtle, but still obvious enough to make you flustered. He loves when he can make you blush, it’s a signal of your true feelings for him. You can hide it all you want, but your body will always give it away.

- Once you begin to let your guard down, the relief is evident on his features. It took way longer than he was anticipating, but now that he’s in, he’s here to stay. Not that he was going to let you go in the first place.

- His advances become a bit more bold, purposely grabbing your waist as he walks by, leaning down to whisper things in your ear when others are around, giving you winks whenever he catches you looking at him for a moment too long. 

- Like Gojo, he brings you around his friends, and does so with excitement. He finds a great joy in bringing you around his loved ones, it’s like incorporating you in a permanent manner to his life. He wants you to know and understand that he wants this, that he wants you.

- Once he’s confident that you have a true opening in your heart for him, he asks you out officially. He knows you would never make the first move into a commitment like this, so he happily takes the lead. And it pays off too, because of course you say yes.

- He will always show his pride and love towards you. You are the most important thing in his life, and it’s his mission to make sure you never forget that.

“I can’t bring myself to stop thinking about you; I don’t want to.”

“Look at me, please. I love you.”

“You don’t understand… You are everything to me.”

“I will take care of you. I will not let anyone hurt you ever again.”

“I will continue love you like this until the day I die.”

Yuji Itadori: Supportive & Patient

- He’s never been in a relationship before, but his kindness and compassion come to him naturally, so he’s typically a very easy person to trust. However, he understands that you have your setbacks and those things are out of his control.

- When I say this man is so supportive, oh my god~

- He’s a dream.

- He doesn’t expect anything out of you. He understands if you can’t get past that barrier with him to form a romantic relationship. The most he’s hoping for is for a true friendship with you. He adores you and wants to ensure you understand that.

- He would never make you feel forced or rushed into something you aren’t ready for, no matter how badly he wants it.

- This angel will sit and listen to everything you have to say, offer support and comfort, and give you his full, undivided attention. He genuinely cares about how you feel and the experiences you’ve lived through. He's a fiend for the lore.

- He flirts indirectly, but not intentionally. He’ll compliment you, or graze your hand with his own, or arrange one-on-one outings that could be considered dates. If you say anything about it, he’ll immediately become flustered, offering to invite Nobara and Megumi along if being alone with him makes you uncomfortable. 

- Once you’ve opened up to him more and have shown the blossoms of your trust towards him, he’s absolutely over-the-moon, but still careful to not push you into anything. His flirting becomes more direct, but he’s still very soft with it, stopping if he notices you in discomfort. 

- He doesn’t even have to try to show you how much he cares, it’s just built into who he is. If he cares about you, you know it. It’s extremely hard to ignore.

- He’ll always ask for your opinion on things, including major life decisions, and genuinely let the weight of your words sit in his head. He brings you around his friends, and goes out of his way to invite you whenever they’re going out to places you may have never been before. He wants you to be included, always.

- After a while, he’ll sit down and tell you about how he feels. He doesn’t outright ask you to date him, but he wants to clearly communicate his love for you. He lets you decide what you want to do with this information, and gets adorably excited when you reveal your reciprocation. 

- Being with him is honestly a whiplash in comparison to how you’ve been treated by others in the past, but you’re grateful for the genuine and true love he gives you. He would literally tear apart the world for you if needed.

“I never thought I’d be so lucky to be with someone like you.”

“I am so in love with you. Please stay with me.”

“I hope you’ll never forget how much I adore you.”

“I feel like I’m home whenever you’re around.”

“I am so happy right now, I feel like I could explode.”

Toji Fushiguro: Impatient & Forward

- Yeah, you saw this coming.

- Always the abrasive man, once he wants something, he has decided that it is his. In this case, it’s you! Lucky you?

- Don’t get me wrong, he cares, but he's also a bit offended that you don’t outright trust him. Sure, he gets that he’s not the softest man in the world, but has he not shown you enough appreciation or something? Damn.

- He shows you more care than he does to others, but in terms of patience, it’s next to none. He even calls you by nicknames already, such as babe and brat. The usual. 

- He doesn’t care if you aren’t in an “established relationship”, because you will be eventually. He doesn’t like beating around the bush. You’ll trust him sooner or later.

- He’ll listen when you voice your concerns, but don’t expect him to stop his advances towards you. Of course he cares about how you feel, but you’re already stuck with him. He knows he’s already growing on you, so he’ll just keep it up until you decide to fully let him in.

- He finds your anxiety kind of cute, honestly. He takes it as shyness, and he just can’t wait to break you out of that shell. Not to mention he loves to purposely fluster you to the point you can’t speak.

- He wants to absolutely annihilate the people who made you feel this way. He knows this is a lifelong problem you’ll have to deal with, and he wishes he could go back in time and stop anyone from hurting you. 

- It’s okay though, he’ll just prevent anyone from ever doing that to you ever again. And maybe find the people who did this in the first place-

- Once you begin to open up to him, nothing really changes. He continues to act as though you guys have been married for years, but on the inside he’s as excited as a child. He knows he’s made a breakthrough.

- He doesn’t have many friends to bring you around, so when you start to worry about him being embarrassed of you, he’ll notice and feel a bit bad. He needs to prove you wrong.

- He’ll start taking you out to very public places, just the two of you, and openly show his affection for you. He hopes this establishes his feelings more, because he’s honestly too lazy to do anything too extravagant.

- There isn’t an official conversation, technically. Not one initiated by Toji, anyway. If you want any clarification, all you have to do is ask him. He’ll give you that “are-you-dumb?” look, and say that you guys have already been dating for a while now. 

- He’s been telling everyone that you’re married anyway. 

“I love you, now shut up.”

“Don’t lie—I see the way you look at me.”

“So are you gonna kiss me or are you just gonna keep staring?”

“I shouldn’t be allowed to be this happy, I think fate was a little harsh on you.”

“It’s crazy that you’ve put up with me for this long. Not that you have a choice, though.”

Megumi Fushiguro: Reciprocation & Patience

- Wow, look! A perfect match!

- Or an opponent.

- Mr. Trust Issues over here fully understands your predicament, and reciprocates the same feelings of anxiety.

- He sees you as an equal, but it’s so hard to fully open his heart to you. He’s just as afraid of you as you are of him in the beginning. 

- His feelings for you terrify him to no end, especially since he can’t seem to get them to go away. Every thought always has you tagged into it somehow. How did this happen?

- This is a relationship that’s going to take some hard work from both ends to blossom. You might even need an external factor to help you out, like the oh-so-caring Yuji, or the ever-annoying Gojo. After that, things become a bit easier.

- He feels a sense of relaxation whenever he’s around you, like he doesn’t have to put up a front or hide how he truly feels about certain situations. The more you open up to him, the more he reciprocates, and vice versa. 

- He doesn’t flirt, but he does go out of his way to show he cares. He’ll cover up table corners when you walk past or bend over to reach for something. He buys you your favorite foods on days you’re feeling down, and he always lends an attentive ear when you need to talk, or even a shoulder to cry on. 

- He does these things, because you do the same for him. He feels appreciated and heard when he’s with you. He feels cared for. And he will do his best to ensure he can offer you that same sense of security.

- You guys open up to each other at the same pace, a relationship blossoming along with trust. The “flirting” becomes more natural: soft praises to each other, knowing glances, soft touches when near each other. 

- You begin doing more “couple” things, like going out one-on-one together, memorizing each others favorite everything, buying gifts and sharing food. It’s only a matter of time before one of you pops the question now.

- Speaking of, the conversation is of course, mutual. You both decide around the same time that you want to finally muster up the courage and just talk about everything. And so you do, and it ends way better than either of you could have ever imagined. 

- It’s gotten to the point that the teasing from Gojo doesn’t bother him as much anymore. In fact, he almost welcomes it—it’s proof that you guys are solid and real. That you aren’t going anywhere. And neither is he.

- He’s so focused on keeping you protected from the evils of the world, having experienced them himself. He never wants you to be subjected to anything like that again. He would happily die a million deaths before anyone could ever hurt you again. 

“I think I’m in love with you, and I don’t know what to do.”

“You are so much more than you think of yourself. I will make sure you see that.”

“I just need to know that you’re okay.”

“Will you love me forever?”

“I don’t want to be without you.”

[lets-try-some-writing]

What about TFP meeting IDW OP and Megs? I feel like everyone would get whiplash

They would.

Meeting IDW

TFP wasn't quite sure what to expect when it came to meeting IDW. Most were thinking the leaders of the alternate universe would be akin to their own, which they were correct to a degree. Others were prepared to meet either a mad psychopath or leaders far too young for their own good. None save for Optimus expected to see a set of leaders who were both just so... tired.

When Optimus met his IDW counterpart they didn't need to even speak to understand. They were both tired, only pushed on by duty and both weighed down by their sins and weakness. IDW Optimus was exhausted with everything after millions of years of conflict that seemed to only push them further to extinction. TFP Optimus in comparison was more hopeful, largely because he had the touch of Primus and relics of the age of old to aid him. However both were exhausted and wished for rest, both had tried and largely failed to pass the burden on only for it to return. There was no escape, not until their shared duty was done.

This was their reality, and they took solace in the fact that they suffered through it together.

Team Prime looked at their alternate Prime and found him to be akin but oh so very different from their own. He had the same stoicism, but he was damaged in a slightly different way. Where their Prime kept things hidden away behind the Matrix, this Prime showed visible frustration, anger, and confliction. He seemed to not know who he was, what his purpose really was, and what the point of it all happened to be. In short, to the team he was a masterful leader, commander, and soldier... but a damaged mech so worn down by war that seeing their Bumblebee and Smokescreen was akin to watching an actual angel of Primus descend. Such innocence was near unheard of and it was a blessing to IDW Optimus.

Ratchet got along with the alternate Prime just fine, but he only grew more worried for IDW Optimus with every passing moment. The Prime was grim but dutiful, uncaring of himself but oh so attentive to others, and wanting nothing more than to rest but forcing himself to continue on. There was little Ratchet could do for this Prime, but it did help somewhat to show IDW Optimus the hope their universe had in their relics and the Allspark. That seemed to bring the alternate Prime joy.

The Wreckers were largely conflicted when it cane to the alternate Prime. IDW Optimus thought similarly. Bulkhead was not a bot IDW Optimus knew personally and had only heard the designation a grand total of two to three times during his work. The Wheeljack he knew was far different than the one before him and it more often than not left the alternate Prime unsure how to act. Ultra Magnus was similar but not the same to his counterpart, there was something about him to IDW Optimus that set him apart, a spark of hope that seemed to be present in all of the TFP bots. It was something most of IDW Optimus's people lacked after so long of nothing but endless war.

Arcee was quite a different bot from her counterpart. She was still tortured, but she hadn't met the wrath of the council like IDW Optimus's version of her. She was angry, but she had youth and the ability to move past it. She was pained and weighed down by loss, but she had a family to keep her up. It was something IDW Optimus wished for his Arcee, if only to ease her pain.

Bumblebee and Smokescreen were unsure how to act around IDW Optimus. To them he was almost like the logical conclusion of their own Prime if the war dragged on. He was the end that awaited their Optimus should nothing change, and that frightened them. IDW Optimus was wise, strong, and well meaning, but he was not the same. He did not show the same joy, the same life that theirs did. On IDW Optimus's end, he saw the two young bots before him as a strange but wonderful gift. Two little lights amid the darkness of war, young bots who were eager, hopeful, and awaiting a future where their home was restored.

IDW Optimus was strange to the team in a rather unexplainable way. He was their Prime if there was no hope in Primus, and watching that possibility stand before them brought the team a degree of discomfort.

Their reality was built on the truth of mythology and science blending together in every work and action. But IDW Optimus lived in a reality where mythos was a thing of the past and science was a convoluted and painful thing. It was not a world the team wished to live in and pitied the alternate Prime for having to endure.

As for IDW Megatron? His interaction with his TFP counterpart was... poor to say the least. The alternate Megatron had seen the worst of reality, he had committed enough crimes and heresies to beat the many sins of whole worlds. He was tainted, haunted, and had long seen how far he had fallen and taken a step back to rethink his ways. His TFP counterpart was in comparison the embodiment of his darker days when he was still lost in his desire for vengeance. The alternate Megatron saw his counterpart as a lost spark consumed by rage like he was so long ago. As such he saw it as his duty to try and drag TFP Megatron back toward the truth, something that was far more difficult than he would have liked.

His counterpart was intelligent, increadible so and very well spoken. TFP Megatron was far from stupid, but he was lost, and for that reason IDW Megatron tread lightly around his counterpart. Much of his interaction with his counterpart was composed of debate and trying to remain free of conflict. He wanted his alternate self to see all the hurt he had caused, he wanted to help him before it was too late. TFP Megatron's Optimus was just as merciful as IDW's. If he would only repent and work to fix things...

It was a slow and very uphill battle.

TFP Starscream was more than terrified of Megatron's alternate self. The mech was a monster, huge and towering yet somehow soft in his steps and haunted in a way that TFP Megatron was not. He didn't even try to kill the other Megatron, instead hiding behind his own in terror. IDW Megatron for his part found his counterpart's second in command a pitiful thing that was just similar enough to his Starscream to be familiar but odd enough to be strange. He didn't bother trying to focus much on Starscream aside from keeping him out of harms way.

TFP Soundwave looked to the alternate Megatron in confliction. This Megatron was scarred and wore the Autobot badge, yet he fought for the values and freedoms the Decepticons wanted. He was a threat, one that Soundwave would have preferred to eliminate... but he was also a hope. IDW Megatron was living proof that Megatron could get back on the right track and lead them to victory, a true victory. IDW Megatron for his part found the spymaster to be... concerning. He was not like IDW Megatron's Soundwave, he didn't have the same spark of loyalty or the same disposition. All in all, he was someone IDW Megatron tended to avoid.

Knockout and Breakdown were not mecha IDW Megatron was directly familiar with and as such after the initial panic on their parts, he got along with them well enough. He could still be snappy, but he was a welcome relief from his counterpart and upon sharing his numerous frame changes, gained Knockout's interest. It certainly helped that Breakdown being respectful was a welcome change from the constant irritation that was Rodimus.

TFP Shockwave was concerning simply because IDW Megatron had exactly zero sway over him. The scientist saw the alternate Megatron as a fascinating specimen and IDW Megatron wanted nothing to do with him. He had dealt with enough scrap with his own Shockwave to know to leave the mech alone. His Shockwave was bad enough with just science, but this one had access to old magic as well. IDW Megatron had no desire to get involved in that.

When it came to Arachnid, IDW Megatron's first instinct was "Burn it with fire". He hated her on instinct and thus stayed as clear of her as possible. It wasn't his place to kill anyone in the alternate universe he found himself in, but Primus he wanted to punt her into a wall after hearing of some of her war crimes. He wasn't much better but she did it for fun, and that enraged him.

As for the Vehicons? IDW Megatron quickly found himself protective of them. They were clones that didn't ask to be forged and were treated as disposable despite serving such a vital function. With that said IDW Megatron devoted a good chunk of the time he wasn't spending trying to get his alternate self back on the right path with them. They were a good bunch who served because they knew no other path. They reminded him of his fellows in the mines, they deserved better.

[buddieisgoingcanon2024]

There is no way Eddie’s current storyline isn’t going to lead into a sexuality arc…

Like, aside from Ryan admitting Eddie has repressed feelings, it all makes sense.

With Shannon, she was his best friend and they formed a connection of sorts. They went into a relationship by force, she got pregnant and married because of it. Eddie was never bothered or interested in her apart from the ‘connection’ and ‘bond’ they had built. He went to war to get away from her and he never had her back in anything. He loved the idea of being married to her but never said he loved her, Michael said the same thing about Athena. He loved being married to Athena and having his children but he is gay and therefore never loved her in that way, as Tim Minear recently said, Eddie has this romantisised and idealised version of what their future could have been together and what their past was eventhough their past was unhealthy and they were barely a married couple and their future weren’t going to happen because she wanted a divorce.

From the perspective of the show, not actresses. Ana and Marisol come across as the perfect partners, they are both nice, beautiful and they both seemed to be very good with Christopher, I mean they kinda have to be if they are looking after him loads. So…why does he not want to be with either of them and he’s purposely messing up his relationships with them? Because they aren’t Shannon. He doesn’t have the same connection with them that he had with her, it’s always spoken about how he wants a mother-figure for christopher but never that he wants a partner. So, when he gets this ready-made family, he has panic attacks because he actually isn’t ready for it and messes it up. Breaking up with Ana because it’s got too serious and then moving Marisol out the same day she moves in. He has a habit of not spending time with his girlfriends but using them often to look after Christopher. A mother figure for Chris but not a partner for him.

As I said, they aren’t Shannon which is why he feels this way. But even then his relationship with Shannon wasn’t that great either so why is he trying to find it again? It’s the only ‘connection’ he’s ever known, or so he thinks, it’s the only thing that he’s experienced and had nothing to compare it to because he hasn’t formed any other connections like that since Shannon. From his perspective that is. He’s never been ‘in love’ and he doesn’t know what that feels like the only thing he thinks is that he was in love with Shannon and that is what love must be, ar least it’s the closest thing he’s ever had to being in love with someone that he’s doing everything he can to find that again which is why he was so quick to cheat on Marisol with Shannon’s lookalike. Delusion and Desperation.

I feel he’ll slowly start to realise that her lookalike may look like her but won’t end up being the ‘same’ as her. Devin said that the lookalike is going to meet Buck at some point who mentions that she isn’t Shannon in terms of her body language and personality etc and I feel like Eddie will end up realising that it’s true and once he ends up out of his state of delusion he’ll truely feel alone. He can’t have Shannon or her look-alike, he won’t have Marisol anymore because…he cheated amd he’ll realise he doesn’t need that mother figure for Chris…then what. He’ll struggle and push everyone away because everything that’s happened is all he’s ever known. He literally started a family from a young age. Then his sexuality arc will start and he’ll end up realising why all this has happened….because he never loved any of them in a way he was suppose to. But why?……

Ryan said s8 will a refresh button for him and will have a few bombshells and that Eddie will have a new lifestyles that will go into uncharted waters.

I love your thoughts anon. I wish I could right down mine as good as yours.

[bae04xx]

“fuck off!” i screamed, my voice hoarse from being half asleep, while i pushed my brother away from me. rolling over to the other side of my bed, i ignore his giggles,

“bastard, wake me up again and see what happens..” i mumble into my pillow, sensing his spine shoot up after hearing my threat.

“woah! y/n’s cranky aren’t you?” he cackles, before slapping me against the head and strolling out, as if he hadn’t been annoying the living fuck out of me, as if he was completely innocent!

ben being my brother had its perks, like ultimate protection from him and his weirdo gang, but it had a lot more cons. like some bitch at school looks at me the wrong way? oh well, it doesn’t matter to me, ben sees? she’s dead.

they’re so overdramatic.

and trust me, i haven’t had a decent night’s sleep since we moved into this hell hole. either i’m kept up by screaming, ben, gunshots or the lads bringing some random women back- that’s definitely the worst one.

everyone here had a purpose, i didn’t, my brother was some magical ghost that could hack into anything. i didn’t know shit about him, he would refuse to tell me, but he managed to work a deal so i could stay here, to keep me ‘safe’, because what’s safer than being around deranged serial killers? i was just deadweight, and while most people here tried to ignore that fact, considering i took care of them all fairly well, i knew it. my cooking, cleaning and caring skills were not nearly as useful as the dangerous shit they did.

but i’m sure they appreciated a home cooked meal after a long day of work, it calmed me down after a stressful day at school. winding down with them was something i loved, especially with jeff, we got on very well- despite ben and his rivalry. i ignored their petty arguments, and stormed off whenever they attempted to include me into them. i loved seeing how calm jeff could be around me, he was always so on edge, fierce, ready to pounce on anyone, but with me it wasn’t like that.

i could sit with him and just talk, sure he wouldn’t open up to me about anything, too closed off and stuck in his defensive mind to do anything of the sort, but he could relax with me- and i enjoyed that.

i missed normality a lot more than i let on, and ben could see that in me. the way i stared at the photos of us when we were young, how we would get high and i would ramble on about our old memories, he saw through my facade, and knew how much i missed my past life.

but this was me now, taking care of my shitty brother and his coworkers? friends? housemates? whatever he called them.

what pissed me off the most is how i was the only person in the house that still had to go to school. ben insisted on me getting an education, making something of my life- i think it was because he didn’t want me living in this shithole forever like he had to. i would come home from school everyday and waffle to toby about everything, he understood better than anyone. he could tell that deep down i did care, i cared about everything, too much. while i pretending to not give a fuck about the bitches i had to deal with, i would come running to him, crying in his arms after a hard day. i didn’t want a solution to my problem, i wanted a distraction, comfort. and ben couldn’t wrap his tiny brain around that, but toby could.

“they’re.. all just so horrible..” i sobbed as toby stroked my hair softly, holding me tightly in his arms, suddenly flicking his wrist from his ticks, he quietly cursed himself.

“i know, y/n, it’s going to be ok, i promise,” he whispered, gently wiping the tears from my face.

“they’re nasty because their jealous of you, jealous of your beauty and your confidence.”

“but.. i just want them to be nice to me..”

“i know baby, you don’t deserve this.”

toby was like a brother to me, unlike jeff who found comfort in me, i found comfort in toby. he was like my very own safety blanket, he would wrap me up in his arms and let me cry all my emotions out, carrying me to bed when i fell asleep in his arms and tucking me in. he was like the dad i had always wished for.

when everyone would argue, i would lock myself in my room. i hated it with every cell in my body. the boys would scream, yell, punch walls, kick doors in- and the dreadful sound of shots being fired. it would send me into a panicked frenzy. there was one particularly bad argument between ben and jeff once, over something stupid i can’t even remember.

“y/n- knock some fuckin’ sense into your deadbeat brother!”

“don’t bring my fucking sister into this- just because you’re in love with her! don’t think i can’t tell you fucking deranged pervert!”

“fuck off ben, like i would ever want to be with someone RELATED to you. if i had it my way you would be dead were you stand.”

i listened to their harsh words as jeff knocked on my door, making the walls vibrate.

“i don’t want to be involved! go away!” i screamed, tucking myself under the covers on my bed, pulling a pillow over my head to tune out their shouting- until i heard the familiar bang of masky’s gun.

i thought my heart fell out of my chest in that moment, my blood ran cold as i fumbled out of bed and ran to my door, swinging it open to find a hall in the opposite wall to my bedroom. i had never felt more relief in my life.

“stop fucking arguing. you’re keeping me awake.” masky said coldly as ben and jeff just stared at the bullet in the wall.

i hated living here.

[myrmyrtheorca]

Ranking reveal please ! "5 most compatible with the oc of your choosing amongst khr cast' ✨️ ( — romantic ! or not! it is up to you.) maybe, with explanations? hehe

taking a little break from preparing the answers with the Entity (who was very pleased with them and is trying her best to articulate her answers because she hasn't spoken to people in a while) to do this because I have been hunted for sport when it comes to KW pairings/compatibilities-

These will be for Myr and Lidija, if anyone's curious to see this done with Anemone and Tristam let me know! The post would be too long with all 4 of them I feel qwq'

DISCLAIMER: Myr and Lidija are adults, so every non-familial pairing here listed is assumed to take place in a scenario where both individuals are adults.

-- [Myr] --

Yamamoto Takeshi (romantic) - Myr is naturally more attracted to people with a positive attitude, and Takeshi adds to it with his laid-back personality. They would work well together, whether it's a relationship or a mission. Takeshi's understanding personality would be a good "counter" to Myr's more sharp and aggressive one, though he'd probably draw the line the moment Myr puts herself in danger while trying to prove a point or strike down the enemy. She'd berate him for it, but deep down Myr needs someone to take care of her.  

Adelheid Suzuki (platonic) - one could argue that Adelheid's tendencies to discipline could be a dealbreaker for Myr, but that would mean she wouldn't be friends with Anemone either. Adelheid will fuck you up if it means following her beliefs, and Myr would respect that. I feel like they could bond thanks to their abrasive personalities, Adelheid would have fun trying to get Myr to dress properly and Myr would have fun teasing her and making her angry on purpose.   

Uni (familial/admiration) - a young but strong-willed leader who isn't her brother and who's in DIRE NEED of a big sister ? Sign Myr right up! Myr would immediately recognize that Uni is not exactly a normal girl and that her strength comes from within, not to mention her kindness and the way she maintains her child-like behavior even with the burden of her responsibilities. Myr would love to act as a big sister to her and with enough time she'd make a loyal subordinate and close friend.  

Superbi Squalo (admiration/romantic) - to the surprise of absolutely nobody, yeah. Squalo is pride incarnate, he has a title, he's feared, and most of all, independent. That's exactly the person Myr would like to become deep down, at the cost of proving right all those who already consider her to be a monster. He's the living proof that being ruthless gets you what you want, and while she tries to push those violent thoughts away for the sake of Lidija and her newfound friends, he'd be like a "Stop Being Nice, Go Apeshit" switch. After all, if she was as strong as him, she could take back all that was taken from her by her family.  

Lancia (romantic) - ok so canon gives out exactly 0 info about Lancia other than "he's actually Not the Bad Guy", but. As mentioned Myr tends to associate herself with strong people because she likes the challenge, but here we have a man trying to salvage what's left of his life because he was too strong and got manipulated because of it. It would be a great wake-up call for Myr, because she too is subjected to prejudice because of her past (in her case, her lineage) and Lancia would be the one to tell her that revenge and hate are not roads to follow.

-- [Lidija] --

Chrome Dokuro (romantic/platonic) - Lidija is a natural caretaker, and would immediately understand that Chrome is delicate. She needs time, it's a trial-and-error process with her. But just like she did with Myr, when she's dedicated to making a person smile, she doesn't give up that easily. I feel like Chrome would learn to see that Lidija is a safe place, but whether that would develop into something romantic is something I myself don't know if it could happen. I feel like Chrome's sense of relationships is a little warped seeing everything she's gone through.  

Tsunayoshi Sawada (platonic) - discovering that the most rumored family in the Cavalieri halls is run by such a genuine and brave person would absolutely make Lidija Tsuna's number 1 fan. I don't have much on these two, Lidija's extroverted manners would probably make Tsuna feel a little embarrassed (think a bit of Haru's effect), but overall she'd be a loyal subordinate.  

Lussuria (platonic) - they would be such a POWER DUO. Lidija could even learn a thing or two about sass. Since I HC Luss to be both an ex-stylist and an ex-architect, they'd have such long and interesting talks about a variety of topics. And of course, Lidija could absolutely act as a model for their fashion experiments! Overall I think Luss would act as an "enabler" for the more flamboyant part of her extroverted personality.  

Dino Cavallone (romantic) - YEAH HE'S HERE TOO LXD FANS REJOICE I've always been a supporter of her and Dino myself because he has the looks of the typical prince charming and the goofness of, well... Dino Cavallone. What else to add? He's gentle, devoted, honorable, and would have a hard time saying no when she asks for him to gift her something expensive. As a treat.  

Irie Shoichi (romantic) - he'd be like a plush toy Lidija can sport around. His soft but dedicated personality would really complement hers, and he'd probably trigger her more protective side with all his stress symptoms. Plus, she'd make the cutest assistant!

[piratecore-art]

Fanfic- pairing Ben/harry/Uma

Rating: explicit

King Benjamin Florin Beast held his head high.

It was what he’d been taught.

The pirates jeered as Harry Hook and Gil Gaston led him up the ship’s gangway and onto deck.

He’d been striped of his jacket, hat and shoes already, leaving him in a thin blue shirt and studded pants- with bright aradon-yellow socks.

Ben was still cursing himself for being caught, for being recognized by Gil in the first place. He should never have shown up on the isle looking and acting like a target.

Harry snickered as he purposely tripped ben and ben fought a growl.

Making enemies won’t do you any good, he reminded himself.

He glared at the objectivly attractive first mate, taking in the other boy’s ocean azure eyes painted with black khol, his strong musceles and lean frame, his…

He glanced away, blushing.

He lifted his chin again, determined to keep his demeanor.

And then he saw… her.

Uma.

The captain of the pirates, the queen of the Isle.

She was standing at the prow of the small ship, her long, heavy braids flowing in the wind, small shells and strands of teal caught among them. Her chin was strong and proud, lifted, just like his, head high like royalty.

She was stunning.

A smirk painted her lips as she beheld him, the captive king, flanked by her loyal first and second mates.

Harry snarled. “Keep yer eyes to yerself, beast.”

Ben glanced down, flushing yet again.

Uma swayed as she walked twords them. “Bring him below deck.”

“You don’t want to do this,” ben protested, trying one last desperate bid for freedom. “Whatever it is you want, we can negotiate-”

Uma spun around and grabbed the young king’s chin harshly. “I don’t negotiate with tyrants.”

The words spun in his ears as gill grabbed his arms and dragged him harshly beneath the deck, harry following after with a crazed giggle.

I don’t negotiate with tyrants.

Is that how she saw him? How all of the Isle saw him?

He’d never even considered the possibility before.

In the eyes of auradon, he was either just and merciful, or too soft-hearted. No one would consider him… tyrannical.

But to the people his father had imprisoned, to the children he’d failed to rescue…

He had thought, at first, that uma must be working for her mother. But slowly, he was beginning to realize they respected her as a leader in her own right, in a way Mal had never been.

The split up at the stairs, gil leaving to attend to his other duties while harry dragged ben down into the dark depths of the ship. When they reached the bottom of the creaking wooden staircase, he shoved ben roughly to his knees.

Ben let out an oof as his body made impact with the hard wood boards, feeling a splinter worm its way trough his jeans and into his knee, but unable to touch it with his hands bound behind his back.

Harry circled his captive slowly.

As his eyes adjusted to the dark, ben could finally get a good look at harry. The other boy was tall- taller than him- and lean, muscled and hungry-looking. His eyes held a gleam of insanity, and his face was split in a manic grin.

Ben shivered slightly as he felt the force of that intense gaze directed at him.

The dark kohl around harry’s eyes gave him the appearance of almost a skeletal presence, something dark and dastardly come from the king’s nightmares to taunt him.

He forced himself to meet harry’s eyes, but insted of being intimidated, the first mate’s grin merely grew.

“I bet-” he chuckled, low and dirty- “I bed i get to hook ye. I bet uma lets me-” he licked his lips and leaned down, pushing the tip of his hook under ben’s chin- “i bet uma lets me do all kinds of-”

“You don’t have to obey her!”

The words were out of ben’s mouth before he could think them through.

Harry froze. “What’s that supposed to mean, benny?”

Ben’s tongue flicked nervously over his lips. “I just meant… you don’t need to do what she says. You don’t have to hurt people. If she, or your father, are making you do stuff-”

“My father is dead!” harry snapped his teeth in ben’s face. “Uma killed him. So no, he’s not making me do stuff.”

Ben felt ice flood through his veins. Uma had killed hook?

“She- but if she hurt someone you love, why would you follow her? Are you scared of her, or…” ben trailed off when harry let out a loud, high pitched screech of laughter.

“Loved? You think I loved him? Oh, that’s funny.”

His face turned suddenly serious, and he leaned in to whisper in ben’s ear. “All the old man ever did was fucking hurt me. So no, I didn’t love him. And I follow Uma because she saved me.”

Ben closed his eyes, feeling the sharp tip of harry’s hook slide over te skin of his neck in a blatant tease, feeling harry’s warm breath against is ear, feeling-

“Harry. Leave it.”

Ben’s eyes snapped open at Uma’s voice.

She stood in the doorway, her leather teal and black skirt swishing around her hips. She spoke firmly, but a small smile still painted her lips as she gave harry a fond, exhasperated look.

He grinned unapolageticaly back at her. “Just getting him ready for you, darling.”

The endeerment through ben for a loop.

Mal had told him there was n0 ‘dating’ on the isle, discribing it as more gang activity. So to have harry call Uma darling, in front of a proiosoner no less, was strange.

Something pullsed in ben’s heart, an almost ache.

He’d always thought mal’s cold and withdrawn mannerisims were just part of her isle upbringing, always been so convinsed that what they had was true love, even when she pushed him away.

But if Uma and Harry could be openly affectionate… maybe he was wrong.

Maybe he was the problem.

He looked up to find Uma staring at him with a cutrious look on her face. He tried to rally himself.

Im trapped in the bowels of a pirate ship surrounded by Vk’s, he thought. Now is not the time.

“Harry,” Uma drawled, “I think the king is wearing a little too much to be comfortable. After all, it’s quite warm today.”

Harry and ben both froze in confusion.

What?

Uma gestured to the bound and helpless king. “Well, harry? You heard your captian. Get to work.”

Harry hesitated a second longer, then a smile slowly crawled across his face, getting more manic by the second. “Well well well, benny-boo. Let’s see what’s under those fancy auradon rags.”

Ben swollowed hard.

Harry stalked twords him slowly.

He slipped the tip of his hook under the thin material of ben’s navy shirt, and with a distinct rippp, it gave way.

Be nshiverd in the cold air.

Harry ripped the shirt in half, then shoved it down, letting it slide to a stop at harry’s bound hands.

“Pants next,” uma hummed from where she watched. She had taken up residence in a sturdy-looking chair encrusted with seashells that ben hadn’t previously noticed in the gloom, and sat with one leg neatly crossed over the other.

Ben shivered under her penetrating gaze.

Harry yanked ben roughly to his feet and stripped him, leaving him in nothing but boxers and socks.

Harry and Uma both stared.

Ben blushed, glancing down at his blue underwhere covered in little yellow crowns.

He was humiliated.

And then it got so much worse.

Because under their stares, he began to feel himself growing hard. His cock strained agianst his boxers, the tip leaking slightly.

Harry gave a low whistle.

“So he likes humiliation.” He smirked, speaking to uma as though Ben wasn’t even in the room. Uma smiled, a low, predatory thing.

“Perfect.”

Ben shuddered, his eyes wide with fear.

Harry moved tword him again. He grabbed Ben's hands and reached up, hooking his bound wrists to a chain dangling from the ceiling. Ben felt his body stretch, his toes just touching the ground. He felt utterly helpless.

And it was making him so desprate.

He wanted Harry to touch him.

Wait.

He meant- he wanted Uma to touch him, surely? Uma was the one who was getting him worked up, the one making him hard.

Because… Harry was a man.

And Ben wasn’t gay.

He couldn’t be.

King Adem had made sure of that.

He’d screamed at ben enough about being a fag, about how the futer king could never be in love with a boy. It was bad enough that ben linked being dominated by women, he shouldn’t- couldn’t- like men.

And yet, he’d never wanted Audrey or even Mal the way he wanted Harry right now.

And Harry obliged him.

He slid his hand slowly over ben’s torso, lightly muscled from tourney, squeezed at his pecs, ran a hand over his delicate throat- all under Uma’s watchfull eye.

“Pretty,” she cooed. “Two pretty boys.”

Ben glanced at Harry, who was inches away from his face with his hands on ben’s biceps, expecting him to protest at being called pretty. But instead, a gentle blush stained the son of Hook's face.

“Thank ye, Uma,” he murmured.

A beat passed.

“Well?” Uma said. “Aren’t you going to thank me, Ben?”

Ben debated, but te end of Harry’s hook prodding the underside of his chin made the decision for him. “Thank you, Uma,” he growled.

“Now, harry, why don’t you show our guest a good time?” Uma leaned back in her chair with a smirk.

Harry growled with pleasure, leaning forward and licking and sucking at one of ben’s dusky nipples. Ben arched into his mouth with a cry.

Harry bit down, and Ben squirmed, letting out a high-picthced noise of pleasure and pain. Harry grinned against ben’s pale skin. Next, he used is mouth to lick at the young king’s coller bone, laving with his tongue over each freckle, twisting it like he wanted to savore the taste.

And then he dropped to his knees.

Cupping Ben’s length, he swallowed it whole.

Uma and Ben groaned in unison, and ben looked up to see te pirate queen with her gorgeous strong thighs spread, a hand tucked beneath her leggings pleasuring herself to the sight of harry sucking Ben off.

And suck Harry did.

He lavished Ben’s rock-hard length with tongue and lips and even teeth, gently nibbling the end, making Ben moan and squirm, trying depratly to thrust into te warm heat of Harry’s mouth.

“Harry- Uma- please-”

Ben lost himself in incoherent moans, not even realizeing he’d been redused to begging for release.

And yet, Harry held off just enough, teasing and edging the king, till he was wild wit pleasure and desperation.

And then Uma spoke again.

“Let him use you, Harry,” she mo0aned.

Harry stood, released the king’s hands fro mthe chains, and dropped back to his knees.

Ben didn’t even try to escape.

Instead, he looped his hands through harry’s pretty brown curls, thrusting wildly into his open, wet mouth with a moan. He fucked the other man’s face thouroughly, making the pirate gag with each thrust, all while Uma’s moans filled the air.

He barely even noticed Harry tucking a hand into his own pants to pleasure himself, too busy chasing the orgasm, the height of intensity-

And then he came, hard, Harry swallowing down every drop, milking his length.

Ben Collapsed to the floor, thoroughly spent.

“Good boy,” Uma cooed.

She and her first mate had both orgasmed as well.

She staliked over to Ben, who barely protested as she yanked him to his feet.

“Get dressed. It’s neary time to give you back to Mal.”

Ben froze. “What?”

Uma glanced over her shoulder and laughed. “You didn’t really think we’d keep you? No, Benny-boo, we’re trading you. The king for the wand, to bring down the barrier.”

Ben felt so foolish.

All this.. It meant nothing to them.

He glanced at Harry, but the first mate didn’t make eye contact as he stalked away, leaving Ben bound on the floor.

It was over.

[thescribeoflostmemories]

*coughs* Pants in kakegurui au with reader as a (personal) housepet

Let's say the only reason Pantalone is holding back himself is because you were his benefactor when he first arrived to the academy, losing to him on purpose so that he could pick some cash up for himself everytime it's fund collection time. Everyone knows this isn't some special treatment for him since you do it for everyone who's lacking in funds (for the student council's fund collection) but Pantalone on the other hand is like, *lol*(classic template, I'm sure yk what he does alr)

And pants being the sly bastard he is, uses the cash he won from you to gamble with others, slowly *leveling up* till he becomes the student council treasurer now.

Oh how he wishes he can just talk with you like the other students do but he's just so shy *lol more to insecure but it's ur call here* so when he heard the news you lost in a big game because you've been tricked by one of the students you tried to save, it's show time for Pants *lol*

He acts hella fast too, he won't give you the time to recover from your debts so boom, fund collection time, you are screwed big time.

now you are inevitably a housepet and Pants didn't waste time in trying to be your saviour *lol*, oh you should have noticed how he's the one who has been pulling strings behind your back. You are in fact, not a bad gambler so he ensures that no one will play with you. (The rest is your call)

But one scene I'd love to see (if possible) is probably Pantalone taking you in as his personal housepet (maybe reader lost their sanity by pants' sweet words and the fake security he gives reader) , while your status remains a housepet, the collar and leash on you definitely warns people to not toy with you unless they want to *lol* become one.

Classic and simple but hey, maybe you know a way to add spices :3 (tia *rolls*)

Silent Night

Original title: “Lord of the Night”, " Mine, Mine, Mine! “

Kakeguri Au

Yandere! Shy(?), soft (?) Gambler!Pantalone x house pet! Reader

(Songs listened to while writting: Stalker’s tango by autohearts, Something no everything is wrong by Madoka, whims of fate persona5, Elite four pokemon gen 5)

“Assuming both of them are teens, and mentions of alcohol and abuse of substance is present. But either way, Yandere isn’t a first choice for a healthy romance, not that I am judging by the way. Even if this reached 6,600 words, this work somehow feels so cheap in a way.”

- P of Li’mu

" Even if you have stayed true, the path one will take is ever treacherous and more despicable. Everyone has their own shadow to deal. And every Wiseman is a fool. “ - Scribe, The overseer of Li’mu.

—

“Where is she? It has been at least an hour!" Walking over to the young student who was supposed to be the overseer of the appointed match, they had just received the notification from their cell phone.

Your seventeenth attempt to grasp upon the reigns that taunted you so by the coined cruelty of your own carelessness.

“Where, is, she?" Repeating your statement like a revenant hungry for flesh, wanting the answer in your mind to be vanquished.

The word irked you further once you heard the nickname they associate with you. “Bonny, she backed–” the reasoning is more than enough to be furious, clenched fists pushed the ill-fortunate student away.

You then proceed to storm out of the common room, seeing Pantalone chatting with a student who had a yellow armband.

Hearing a hint of their conversation, “tell that jester, the appointment—” Hushing themselves once they noticed you.

" Ah, senpai, how was it?" His veracious ghost of a smile made present upon facing you. Waving a dismissive gesture at the schoolmate away, in which did so.

“ Fie. " Words came out more like a roaring sizzle of a fire, indication of another failed attempt.

“ Let’s get you home Senpai, I have some new clothes for you to try on. “ Without fear, he showed the paper bags that have the high end named brands.

At home, walking out of the curtains of the walk-in closet is you, grumbling. Even though it is your own abode, you are not sure how to feel about it now that the Regrator is a frequenter in your comfort zone.

" Are you comfortable with that? " Pantalone asks, shuffling the deck of cards in his hands seamlessly wedging the cards between the others. Eyes closed as he faced you, you who wears the gaudy pink punk-like aesthetic ensemble. All you need is bubble gum to complete the look of a rebellious teen.

“ I would not say uncomfortable but, " You sighed, putting on the fingerless leather gloves and flexing your hand. “ Still, wearing something like this, is borderline of the school’s dress code. ” You raised your concerns, the choice of style is seemingly at random. He knew you prefer a more lovely coloured hue hence he got the one you might ‘endure’ the most.

It's fishnet like hosiery, black leather boots. Dreamy coloured lower article, matching sleeveless top, loose jacket. You look far from being who you were before this whole mess. Especially that black lacy necklace you wear, adding a tiny cute bell to it. The purpose of it? He says it is the latest trend, not that you care about it.

Pantalone frowned a bit, and put away the deck of cards, " Sorry, but I have to atleast make you wear something like this. You know how they act if they know you aren't being treated like a 'housepet'." True, with all the false information circulating, you were sure Pantalone wouldn’t come out of his room for a while. Much like when news spread when your ownership fell to him.

You then sat down on the plush bed of yours, crossing your legs and arms facing him. Is there anything in this room that is not ‘gifted’ by him? The decor, the bedding, clothing—

Pantalone called out, suddenly, "You look so," The bespeckled young teen smiled shyly. “ Stunning in that." He continued his words, especially with how ‘tall and intimidating’ you were compared to him in those high boots.

“Pantalone, please," Another sigh escaped your lips as you looked at the pile of gifts you received from him. It doesn’t feel like a gift for some odd reason. But all of these were the things you found interesting and loved, like that latest game you wanted, or that stuff toy you were eying, even clothes for you to wear whenever he brings you to meetings or indulgent parties he was invited to. Perhaps he doesn’t want you to miss out on things he has?

Pushing up his eyeglasses that reflected a fragment of yourself on it. "You don't have to worry about that, you can repay me back, once you found an opponent that could spell out freedom." His signature thinly veiled smile that seems relaxed in your presence.

Adding to that he replied with, "You'll find them, because I trust that brain of yours to think up a plan." Him being the treasurer does give him some perks of possibly scraping a few zeroes into his name. But you knew he wouldn’t stoop to such a low blow, especially that he prefers a more ‘sophisticated’ approach.

You were about to ask him of that strange person earlier, though. Quickly silencing that trivial thought. It was not your place to question what a person entails, no matter how strange and unfamiliar they are.

“It is not easy to scout out opponents,” Given how much you were willing to bet. A meagre brooch that passed down to you as an heirloom is considered a mere child’s decoration to them. But to pawn it, and pay the compounded interest is not ideal.

“I would have thought others would think I would be easy prey to battle considering my connection to you. ” Another concerning thing is that he was recently promoted into the newly established circle called; ‘The Court’ as the ‘King of Coins’. With that kind of title, it would have garnered much attention to you as a chance of mooching off of him. But the juxtaposition of your initial plan, it might as well crumble to dust.

Eyes closed, as you tapped your finger against our arm, "Don't worry, you can just depend on me for now.” Pantalone gestures over to the basket woven object next to the bags of designer clothing,

" Come on now, I got some sandwiches and snacks. I even got a reserve space for us at Jovino’s.” It was almost like you could imagine him wagging his tail, if he has one that is. Opening your eyes just to face away from him with an aspirated expression.

“Pantalone, I appreciate that you would at least take this a tad seriously.” Voicing another concern of yours to him, it is not like a housepet to have a say against their owner. That is at least one thing that sets you apart from them, you are merely ill-stricken with fortune.

That seemed to make him frown, "What's so wrong in having a break once in a while, senpai?" He pouted, it is just so frustrating to see the cul-de-sac of your labour. “You do not have to push yourself," the Rex of earthly desires huffed, crossing his arms. Though, seemingly to understand your point.

Your last opponent, Miss Patisilinia, one of the somewhat richer students yet within your reach of having a higher chance for freedom, had stood you up at the last moment. Like the others who you challenged fell and failed to obtain the winds' breath. Choices thawing thinner and inconceivable each time you try. Treasured assets on hand were resorted to liquefying, thus transferring to the Regrator whenever you lost and he won it back for you. Sitting down on the bed, its plush memory foam sank from the weight.

You can't keep this up, especially the dripping pile of hallowed promises being shouldered by him. ‘Are you even productive enough that another person will have to sweep you off your feet?!’

"How long will this string of mishaps continue?" Pulling on your hair and throwing yourself back on the bed, you’re at wits end. This never ending cess pool game ping-pong of unpaid debt and loans are the heaviest burden of any gambler.

The investor of the hundreds if not dozens of assets under his keen watch tried to comfort you, “ Senpai, please–" Face softened, coming closer and leaning down on the bed next to you to place his gloved hand on your shoulder.

How vexing! To think he claimed himself as your Kohai…

Brushing him off, gently. Turning your back on him while still laying on the bed, mumbling in a low voice you said: "I, this is insufferable." Even though he hasn’t done anything to harm nor force you to do stuff for him, it is kind of him, compared to what others could force such repulsive commands they’ll give you. He does bring you along to his trips, meals, and seemingly keen on listening to your financial advice.

"You could find someone, you just haven't met them yet," Pantalone leaned his head on your side. “Wait a little longer okay, they’re just provoking you to lose your temper.” While that is true, you don’t have anything worthwhile anymore by that time comes.

Much like the previous school vice-president; Oscar, once a wealthy man now turned into a tumbling jester upon loss to one of the Court.

Your throat feels like someone is suffocating you.“How much do I owe you?” one-hundred and eighty-five school days since you were in liability. Those insulting names they called you; ‘Bonny this, Bonny that.’ You were not some sycophant to Pantalone.

Pantalone hesitates as he dictates the amount you lost and he gained. “Do you want me to put it in the journal for you?” You were never fond of putting things on paper. Though certainly grateful that he did not place a compounded interest rate on it nor ask anything much more.

Not even facing him and letting him lay on your side still, “No, no need.” Before you were turned into a house pet, he was a considerably casual gambler, in your eyes at least. Always hanging from the sidelines after you had taught him the ways of the school. Despite his accumulated ranks, he had much rather spend his time with you.

Always so aware of this growing affections, politely declining of his yearning grandiose amore so he would find another that would suit him.

“What am I going to do with you?” The bespeckled, inky haired lad sighed, sitting up from the bed knowing he might not be able to convince you to go on a picnic with him. Not in this state at least. “We really need to loosen you up a bit…” Adding that statement.

With a clenched fist that scrunched up the bedding, “I do not need rest, what I need are answers to solutions. I cannot just be idle,” Dismissive of his idea of being so still, being on standby only feasts upon the Damocles that hangs over you.

Muttering as well as honoring you, “Senpai.” Lazy eyes that stared back at him, realising the singed contemplation of his words.

“ My apologies, I was just–” you say, trying to retract your sentence.

His gloves hand gave pause. " It is understandable considering your position, but please, as for who I am now, I am responsible for your well being. So, please, just this once: humour me. " He pleaded, with softened stillness. Even with his plea, you know your answer to him out of contrite.

Lights erratically move, distasteful music thrums through the speakers of the dance room floor. Laughter of haughty, grim socialites made clear. This is not your forte; Abuse of substance, intimate comfort and loose tongue of conflict, it all reign supreme in the Jester’s playground.

Thanks to Pantalone for the early reservations, still wearing a similar attire from last week now lay resting behind the trinket curtains that poorly give privacy, one cascade down on one side. Sitting on the semi-circle couch with a table in the middle, across from you is a briefcase of his.

Then entered the beast that swaggered “ Are you having fun, Senpai? " Smiled Pantalone, holding a bottle of champagne in his hand and pouring himself a glass that uncomfortably sits at the edge of the rim.

Holding in your tongue that you clearly do not want it to spill over. Hesitant hands held the thin stem of the glass before your resenting gaze peered at the sparkling money that flowed into the clear oubliette, a reflection returned even the most boldest gaze.

Only the booming silence between you in this false box of seclusion remained evident, it is concerning to know that the annual after finals party that promises darkness for depraved emotions. Blaring lights of multi-colored dangers and intangible noises that pass in and out to the other ear. The bottle of champagne was then placed at the table in front of you.

“ Senpai, you do not need to be so, uptight." His posture mimics one of yours, before carefully taking your own glass by the rim from you to grab your attention to him.

“ I have no words, but reserved for any actual opponent. “ And stayed silent you did. Stewing with self-made rejection and tears to brood about your own misery.

The ever artful smile on his face is still, strobing light of pristine dread hit his face. He then hums and gives the gold coloured champagne back to you.

“Since the night is still so young, how about we entertain your idea of freedom?" Standing over you as he raised his glass.

There it is, that uneasiness that settles in your gut. Switching from alert thoughts to another.

Staring at the flute wine that he proposed the prospect of your world cage to be open.

“Look around you, Senpai. Everyone is having fun except you. “ his own cup that greedily has his ooze rest almost readily to the top, only taking careless, shy sips of it. Controlled hands that move so freely, making gestures to the people of the dance floor, not caring for the singular drop of extravagant affluence on to the ground from his prize.

“ I will allow you to let loose, just this once." Pushing up the lenses to properly rest on the bridge of his nose.

“Have some fun,” he pulled out from the suitcase of what seemed to be a stack of 1000 yen similar to a smooth brick and tossed it onto the low table in front of you.

“A gift from me, to help you get started." He hesitated for a brief moment, trying to find the right word to not put a blow on what little dignity you have left.

“Why?” What you gave is an incomplete and incorrect phrase, my dear, it should be—.

“Because: as your Kohai, companion, and fellow schoolmate. It is not wrong to find a supporting pillar of strength for a time.” He replied with confidence, swirling the almost overflowing champagne in his hand that it was held so absent-minded-ly that’s been tainted.

But before you could muster up the strength to phrase your concerns, he raised his free hand. “I am well aware that you do not take charity lightly, which is why I propose we play a game; once that you have found yourself in a predicament,” He then raised his transparent glass to you, your face seemed to blend with the ever bubbly liquid.

" I shall step in, now knowing this gambling world has too many variations for one such as yourself.” He spoke as if he already knew the outcome and already decided your fate in a mere glance—.

‘But this could be our only chance.’ Muttered Es, a lone quiet voice of your own mind that rivaled your own Ego Rex. Yet the darkness that slither up to your eyes of a shadow that mirrored you.

‘Take it and be permanent in a state, or never take it and be forever mournful?’ You and I knew what must be done.

Without a word, you hastily took the dough that was presented to you. Its grainy texture of bills felt like it was meant to be savored, every sliver of it.

“ Very good, now, if you excuse me.” He then makes a toast before swiftly and voraciously gulping it in one go of the liquid gold in his hand followed by a server in muted colors collecting the empty container from him.

“ I shall leave you to your hunt; enjoy the night, Senpai.” The ravenous bespeckled young man bid you farewell for now with a shy look on his closed eyed smile before waving and leaving with the briefcase in hand.

Instead of just waiting for some sod to take the initiative, to think you’d be your own worst enemy; the worst kind of parasite, an opportunist.

___________

“Three of a kind!"

How quickly the tables have turned. Earlier you were so desperate for a breath of relief. Underhand tactics are below you, even if it does give leverage. The Ego Rex does not approve of it.

“Flush!"

Gasping, you are running out of time, four hundred quib and it still isn’t enough to ensure your freedom that drown out by the singer from the speaker; ‘Keep your focus’

Cheating hands that tried to play you into their game, it was clear you were not here to entertain the folly they wanted.

“Pay up!" Yelling out against the voices of the masses that cooped in this dreary game edifice, Simply esurient!

‘Win it’

Coughing out the smoke that the people rolled in lavished mold, the scent is ever nauseous enough to choke on it. The giggles from the gaggle of salacious ladies cooed and comforted the loser from his loss.

‘Maybe lose it all.’

Another hour has passed as you look down at the total winnings you have. It was not enough to satiate the looming debt that chained you. Any slip ups are not allowed, once you do– well, let us hope we do not need to think of it much.

‘So we roll the die, see where it may fall’

From there you spotted a game of sic bo. Your mind tells you it is a simple game, but you knew better than to blindly leave it all to chance.

Nearby are the whispers of wealth; ‘—Oh, to have dreams that are of grandeur!’ ‘ One such as thine should we the (?) feast upon the nines.’ ‘A little wait is all you need—’

Just as you were about to leave, taking a single step, a certain person caught your eye.

‘ — spin the wheel, see whom it may call.’

It was Patisilinia..!

“You!" Stomping towards her, pushing aside the other loitering faceless. She was playing a card game with three other students who wore a similar outfit as hers. Your hand placed on her shoulder and forced her to look at you.

You could see her clearly. Ruffled long black hair that covered one side of her face, and that unnerving eye that stared back at you. Even after the school day, she still wears the school uniform so boldly, the only difference is that she has a gold earring hanging on her earlobe.

No words came out from Patisilinia, instead a young man with long red hair stepped forward.

“ If it isn’t Little Bonny, savant of the Elite King of pentacles. Enjoying the night of ” A young flirtatious, slick red haired man winked. The wild right eye seemed to be glittering with lucre trained on you.

You recognized him in an instant, they were the former Elite C. A. R. D.s that was dissolved, Oscar: Ci-devant vice-president, The Duke of Diamonds. But why, out of all the people you could have run into.

“Leave her alone, brother. We have no ill qualms with her." The person on the other seat said, they look similar to Oscar but with shorter and fluffier hair. His eyes are obscured by a metal masque, with only a hint of gold piercing through the eye slit. His apparel mimics those of impeccable discipline and emotion numbing obligation, the Regent of Cups, Justin.

What are the two C. A. R. D.s doing here? Especially playing with Patisilinia, To mock you even more? Or was this a trap laid by—

The Trampled stud raised his hand, “Funny you should say that brother, but we have every right to pick a fight with her. “ Deft finger dragged on the wooden border of the table as he walked over to you. Aggressively swipe off the dust using his finger off the table before pinching it off his skin. Not breaking eye contact with you for even a moment.

“How about a game, Miss Secretary?” He replied with a shy sly smile aimed toward you, " a little tit for tat, if you know what I mean.” The same finger he used to drag on the table is now slowly caressing your cheek on the backside.

Now is not the time for theatrics, pushing the red head away from you and giving him a stern look.

“You are overstepping the boundaries, warlock." Crossing my arms over my chest, the hint of chime from my choker sounded.

“No need to be so abrasive, dear. You’re just in time for a little, reunion.” It was clear that he was not appreciative of you appearing but, that inane grin he has indicated his intentions.

The dealer then walked in with a brand new deck of cards, it was way more than the standard bicycle was used. No, this was way taller and foreboding.

“ Let’s play a game, just like old times, Sweet-ums.” Taunted the one who used to be your closest companion. Grabbing the deck of new cards that seem to be a perfect fit in his hand.

With a huff, brushing past him. “ I don’t have time for this, Oscar.” You then grabbed Patisilinia’s wrist to drag her, but was stopped when Oscar grabbed the girl’s other hand.

" Up-up-up! She stays, the contract states; she has to complete her obligations.” He wagged his free finger with such smugness.

“Bullshit" replied you, who knew you couldn’t do anything for her now. Just as helpless as you were to the whims of stringed strangers.

“ Read the terms and conditions, funny Bonny! " Oscar laughed. " Now, let go, former equerry. The boss has more than one query." A single tug on your fellow teen made you let go, you could see her staring back so longingly as he dragged her back to the gambling table.

‘Another one lured into the sweet promises of untold glimmer of joy, little servant.

They never change, neither did you.

“Release her, now, Duke." His steps were stopped once you made your move, humming in mild curiosity.

“Come back to your senses, did ya?"

Justin took a step forward, a small frown made present, " Savant, you do not have to humor my brother’s antics, it is all just a mere jest to him. Turn away and continue your hunt.” Yet despite that, perhaps that is why you decided to step up against them.

“Save it, Jush. Perhaps we could make a deal with the one who raised their sword.” The smile upon Oscar’s visage rises this familiar trepidation. Once fearful now the every fiber in you, yearns to gnaw at him using primal discomfort.

Just as you were about to pounce at the short red haired ‘Duke’. “ What is it that you desire, little Scintillating friend? '' Oscar suddenly asked, as if the world went dim, spotlights aimed, leading all eyes upon the sou of a soul!

Dry lips parted to speak,“ My freedom. ” You wanted to graduate from this hell hole, though you didn’t expect his next words.

“ You’ll have it then. “ He said nonchalantly, of course, you aren’t stupid. It reeks with foul intentions.

" What’s your plan, Oscar? " Your eyes then darted around from him to various spots around the room, even upon the dealer and on the poor student.

“ Can’t an old friend help another? “ Scoffing at his words, knowing he wouldn’t do it for no real reason, and friends are no exemption.

He then suddenly added, " Well, if you are that negative about me, how about this? ” Oscar then walked back toward the table and made a hand gesture. " Round one is on me, and round two: I’ll unshackle little itty bitty missy if you win. ” Pointing at the student who wears a bucket hat, she had not spoken since you entered the room.

The sickly looking girl in school attire, you always knew everyone in the school. And yet that student with the yellow arm band eludes your watchful eye.

Even though you have no obligation, and you were about to gamble with her earlier. Still you stood up for her, somehow. Perhaps, it was by fate that you wanted her to be bound to you, as you were to Pantalone? What maddening sadism came over to you?

Oscar gave the deck to the dealer with gentle ease." You do know how to play our favorite, right? " The red haired and vocal socialite asked, and you responded with a nod.

" Excellent! Let the stage, begin. ” Both players then drew a card from the darken dealer. Tired eyes beheld, three people holding their cups up in the air in celebration. I threw the card down on the table so they could see it as well.

From his side the Devil card of the major arcana was thrown, facing upside down. The chains that connected from its fist to the two sinful beings.

“ Lowest, go first. '' Oscar chuckled as the dealer collected the two cards quietly to begin the shuffle. Giving five cards to both of us.

The Lovers; A trump card! Queen of Swords, that could be of use as well later on a bid. Three of coins, ace of coins, and ten of coins. All three are useful to sacrifice until a good card comes up.

It was silent in the game room, the muffled sounds of the songstress could be heard ,

‘Give into temptation.’ As if!

The silent dealer spread a set of cards, revealing one of them.

“Call” You announced before pushing some chips and organized. Face turned unrelenting, tuning out most of the sounds and focused on the game and Oscar. But not before you have felt the eyes of a coyote staring down, watching your every move.

Fingers tapped against the table, as his own brother took his side beside Oscar just as always. “ How long will you last against me, or better yet, why didn’t you ask us for help? ” The ‘Duke’ asked.

The cards felt like they were moving too fast, the ticking of the clock sounded so loud even with all the chatter and debauched music playing. Skin touching the grooves of the linen card, as a set after the other were exchanged.

“ Was pride too much for you? ” he childishly tilted his head but then broke into a sly smile. “ Or was it— ” But you stopped him, if you weren't in a situation like this; a good wring of his neck would surely che—.

“ If you want to continue to gamble against me, I advise: you should keep that mouth of yours shut, Oscar. ” Silencing him, as you gave a side eye. Gripping the cards ever close to you.

“Pft, of course, of course,” He waved your words off.

It was a decent, fair, dead-honest trade. By the time you made your bid on the card the ‘first’ round had ended.

“Round two~” Oscar sighed, taking a sip of the sweating beverage next to him.

As the dealer gathered the cards once more, the short haired colleague spoke “ You were always the brave one. "

“ Perhaps that’s why so many leave mountains of love letters or do anything to be close to you.” He continues his words as he glances up at the card dealer who had their own austere expression, staring at the shuffling cards.

“Stop beating around the bush, you flaming-boy-band-cabaret.” You knew what he was going to do. All he speaks of is mere trickery.

“ You’re the center of everyone’s attention, why leave? “ You could see the green tint of his eyes scanning you up and down. Not a word was spoken as the line of fibery cards hit each other loudly.

Another five sets of cards unto the table in front of us.

‘You will win this…’

Empowering yourself with such flimsy words. As you recall your past victories, this gambling peer seems to be indulging your serious face.

Another somewhat alright hand that showed themselves, Justice, by the dealer. “ This feeling, I almost forgot these emotions… " Chuckled Oscar, twisted ecstasy displayed upon his face.

" Was it your heart, or is it just mine? “ What is he blubbering about? Is he trying to stall again?

Glancing back at your hand, reveals: Eight, nine, ten of swords, while the last two revealed to be seven of cups and king of swords…

No trump cards to play, seems like the king of swords is your only hope, if you played your cards right and bluff Oscar into folding, you could have a chance. ‘You could do this.’

‘Success so clearly in view, but is it merely a trick of the light?’

“Miss.”

Someone with a soft voice spoke. Looking beside you is Patisilinia, her hand is placed upon your shoulder. “ You do not have to do this, it’s alright. There is no need to prove anything to anyone. “ ‘The end waits, for the slightest lapse of concentration, afterall.’

Instead of being grateful for her words, the walls seem to whisper conspiracy in your ears. ‘ prove what? Is she one of them? She was suspiciously quiet earlier, she must be. ’ Keyed eyes glance up and down on her appearance, she is equally fretful and wrung out like a drenched shirt.

“ Do not talk like that as if you knew me for a long time, Patisilinia.” Such coldness of your response made the one eyed girl back off.

“Sorry, you just look really stressed and… “ Leaning closer to whisper; " That card guy, can you tell me about him? “

Looking at the plain looking man that wears a golden bow tie, eyes shadowed by their ruffled black hair. Even the smile is so lovingly, yet so evidently sinister.

Thoughts of what this could mean have entered. ‘Who is he?’, ‘do those two have a connection with him?’, ‘is this a ploy?’

This stirring agitation raises more alarms. Gripping onto the luxurious playing card granted more signs of edged awareness.

" Why don’t we switch it up a little? “ With a sly lazy grin, he tossed a cheque on the gambling table, a cashout that weighs more than your debt.

" All, or nothing. “ He added.

You had no money to pay back should you lose. “Bastard, spill it, this is your attempt to save face, isn’t it?! “ Pointing an accusation at him, to which he calmly and teasingly replied; “I have no idea what you’re talking about darling."

‘Self-Preservation is paramount at all costs!’

Refusing to show even a hint of woe, you have failed to realize that there are more than the people in the room who are staring at you.

“ I won’t let the battle end your way, coward! “ You have no idea what is up his sleeves, though for sure it isn’t pleasant.

Hasty gaze placed upon the cards you’ve held. There is no point in integrity if the opponent has no respect!

‘in this decrepit tomb of refined fashion.’

With grit teeth, and rekindled blade. Despite of Ego Rex had said, securing the win is more important than being sorry and ended up with even more trouble.

‘Come on, let's just enjoy the spice// (Of) Life and feel so free//’

Vision slightly blurry for a moment as you heard the songstress’ words. Fueling you to push onward to a better possibility. Though, it is most probably why they prefer this kind of masquerade.

“ This Someone has not rusted yet. " The Dealer mused, as he began to shuffle the cards with ease.

With using every trick you have accumulated over your days as a normal student. It was going relatively well, until you noticed your points are slowly building up compared to Oscar.

“Hoho, surely this will be our very best bet.” Chuckled Oscar, though him speaking like that makes you feel on edge.

—

In a fit of illusioned madness, everything seems to blend and melt once Oscar prompts his arm on the table, revealing his conniving smile.

You should have known that being so wily and clever, deceiving and swindling never ever makes a person so clever. Was this, who you truly are? The scummiest of all gamblers.

“Save your dignity, little Bonny." Hearing the chair being scraped against the floor caused you to stand up and look at the hulking figure of the Captain that followed the wealthy student Regrator.

You tried to follow suit in an attempt at pulling the ‘bodyguard’ of Pantalone. “Capitano— wait!” you cried out, disregarding tugging on to his arm and silky clothes, " Don’t tell Pantalone! Please!" Tears escaping your eyes as it all happened so fast that you couldn’t process what just happened.

“My apologies, but he is already here." Eyes widen as you see Pantalone, opening his briefcase from the entrance of the room. In one swing, an unfathomable amount of paper bills began to shower everyone in raining crisp geld.

" I’m disappointed, Senpai. I told you if you were in a bind, I wouldn’t mind that I have to help you out. “ No, that’s not the look of a stymied person.

" Let us fully relax, and relish all of these! " His voice seems so primal yet refined, as if his inner demons were being satiated by the act he had committed. Followed up with a wave of his other hand to catch a wad of bills to fan himself.

“Capitano, please help me!" Backing away from the affluent stud and begging at the bodyguard to help.

He stayed silent, making the alarm in your mind blaring. Facing the three you were just with.

“Oscar! Justin! Pastilinia, Please! “ The more you tried to scream out the three would answer you the same. Attempts to move closer failed.

" What isn’t real, could never fade. I truly enjoyed your performances, Regrator, Captain, and of course you as well dear little Servant." The dealer smiled and waved so cheekily.

" Pastilinia! “ Screeching out, anxiety from the realistic danger turned aggressive. Dilated eyes focused on the one eyed girl before you heard a soft click.

" Huh… ? " Moving your gead slightly to see the ever twinkling face of the Regrator just over your shoulder. Not realizing he had let go of the fan money and briefcase to attach a leather leash that’s wrapped around his other fist.

“Dearest Senpai. You haven’t forgotten our promise do you?" Breaking away from his space.

" I can still win! I just need a little bit more time. “ he tugged on the leather to pull you back, making you gag and move closer to him. “Right, Pastilinia!?"

When you realized that your bargains no longer reach his ears, “ How could you?! “ Your aggressive tendencies became apparent as hands reaching out for the sickly girl and the rest that basically sold you out to lash out on.

“ I’m sorry but the Jester promises us happiness as well.” Pastilinia replied softly.

Justine scoffed, " a fistful of happiness more like."

“ SCREW YOU! " You roared as you tried to go over to the three but somehow Pantalone managed to get a good grip on the string to drag you away

“Now, now, we don’t threaten a stranger with a good time, Senpai." No matter how many times you hear him say that, it is always so unnerving.

On your knees and clawing at the carpeted floor, you would have held tightly onto if it weren’t for the money he spilled earlier to make it even more difficult. “ Please, have mercy Sire, Pantalone, Regrator.” Never in your life would you think of being seen this pathetic, infront of your old friends at least.

As a last ditch to hold on to, " MASTER!!!" You screamed that held so much vile emotions into the night. In hopes of making out of this treacherous cage alive.

He once dreamed in the dark for the most part, and now, it is your turn little pet.

Bonus cutscene:

Pantalone truly did wanted to be the one to save the day, yet you did not have a say in what he trade away. He waited for this moment ever since his first day in this academy.

“That’s not how you do that." He chuckled as he moved over to you so he could aid you in putting the clothes on, well more like a jewelry thats running across your body like a sash it doesn’t even conceal anything. It felt cold to the touch, making you shiver.

Pantalone steps back to admire the model that wore nothing but gold jewelry on the bed.

Of course, you felt shame that you tried to cover your chest and hid your lower parts using the blanket. No matter what you did, all it does is add more tease for him to unwrap.

After a glance at the name wheel, he smiled before picking up wrapped candy and putting it in his mouth.

This bewilders you until he pressed his lips against yours, passing the hard peice of candy to you. It tasted chokingly sweet yet sour at the same time.

Tongues twirled and swirled around the hard candy, making loud wet squelches.

He moaned as he lean closer to enjoy it further until you were almost going to fall backwards on the bed if you haven’t clung to his clothes.

With one last push, he successfully laid you on the bed, making the gold on your body made satisfying clinks.

“Be a good girl, for master~" he tugged on the leash, rolling up into his fist.

Confused on what he wanted you to do, you only gave a whine. Though afraid if you pissed him off again.

" Down here, Sweet.”

He purred as he pull down his trousers revealing his shaft.

" It’s alright, take it slow.. be careful.” He guided you closer that his free hand is gripping your hair.

“Be… mindful.” He thrusted into your mouth, letting out soft grunts and moans.

The jingle of the gold pieces on your body sound whenever you and him made skin-on-skin contact.

“Af… after this… you.. you got .. puzzle… solve.. “ Bated breath, Pantalone reminded you of the tast he given you. Though it was an excuse to get behind you and do unspeakable things.

Hints of tears began to appear on your eyes as you felt his tip poking down your throat. You wanted to speak, but all you could do is suck on this one-eyed snake.

The night is only half eaten afterall.

[supersoftly]

My mom was telling me she remembers from her childhood that they were still receiving American condensed milk rations post WWII, and her younger brother was only just a little too young to remember that before it got phased out. They really pushed in public schools at the time to "finish your plate or you don't go home", which now is considered almost fiendish, but at the time, where a country had just barely survived and was doing it's best to avoid mass starvation, it was law that probably saved more than hindered.

It just reminded me personally as someone who is lucky enough to be outside of war that I think we forget how difficult life is even after recovery; the country and its people are still there, still growing and living and trying to get back to a sense of normalcy, even after being exposed to the deepest depths of human cruelty and suffering. War feels like the blade that keeps cutting away, even after it's over, yet we all have to deal with the consequences of the choices of people who may no longer even be alive anymore. And it's not like my mom is super old either, it was just how things were, especially in rural Japan where a new house on the block was considered a big event.

Recovery simply just doesn't happen overnight, it happens in each generation with what we give and take, and also with what we choose to leave behind. If we only choose to carry the burdens of the past to lay at the feet of the future, expecting them to carry it, where are we going but only towards a future where children will always bear the responsibility of our cruelty and evil? Is this really the path towards a future where we raise up and support the human experience to a much grander scale, where we minimize the suffering of all innocent people and work together towards something better than what we had prior? I want to believe in our vast interconnectedness, people find each other closer than they ever did before on an unprecedented scale and this is what will raise us up as a human race, simply communicating with each other as the necessary step towards real peace... And I really haven't changed my mind, even with everything going on, with the lies, the propaganda, the control of information... People still actively choose not to pass on hate as their sole inheritance, even when hurt beyond understanding, there is deep resolve and courage in those who continue to choose love when the rest of the world permits otherwise.

This ramble really didn't have a purpose in mind, just thoughts rotating in my brain, and I suppose putting clearly to words why I'm grateful as a hafu that both sides of my family chose love when they easily could've blamed each other given the circumstances. And I know some people will always believe and vocalize that my family made the wrong choice in the grand scheme of things, but for me, the simple happiness of being here today, having the time to just exist alongside my husband and my children, is a joy that keeps stoking the fire to a thankful heart.

[loud-mouth-loser]

the other side of the street

summary: joel lives in the house across from yours and you've had your eye on him. you feel like he could be the answer to all your sorrows -- or at least a shoulder to cry on.

pairing: neighbor!joel miller x reader

rating: angst

warning: pre-outbreak!joel, one-sided pining (?), age gap (20 and 36), mention of dysfunctional family, alcohol, comfort, a kiss, crying, angst

w/c: 2.7k

a/n: this one took a while to write. i just wanted to put down some feelings so...here

----

Whenever you sit outside on the porch, on one of those outdoor plastic chairs, nursing whatever drink is appropriate for the hour (coffee, lemonade, or a beer), your eyes always drift to that house across the street. The brick one with a pick-up parked out front. 

There’s a man, Joel, who lives there with his daughter. You’ve only talked to him a handful of times, maybe at a semi-annual neighborhood barbeque or at Walmart in one of the aisles looking at brands of cereal, but never on purpose. Nonetheless, you have a fixation. 

You’ve never yearned for someone like this before.

Because Joel is different. 

He’s soft. 

He has that kind of softness you’ve been searching for your whole life. That feeling of comfort that you’ve craved since you were old enough to think.

It’s the way he acts with Sarah, his daughter, showing her unconditional love and always looking at her with an air of awe that says “I can’t believe you’re my kid.” Or how he’s constantly fixing a neighbor’s sink or a/c unit because he can “spare the time” when all he really wants to do is sleep after a hard day of work.

He’s selfless and genuine. A rock in a trashing sea of incoherence. Something to hold on to as the waves push and pull at you, trying to suck you out into uncharted waters.

But he’s also a man. 

And you, a woman. 

You can’t help but admire the gentle curls of his greying hair and those precious brown eyes. And his southern drawl that could pull you to your knees. He could just say your name and you’d be stammering over your words.

He’s more man than you’ve ever experienced in your life. 

And you crave it, you need it.  

You need to feel his scratchy salt and pepper scruff rub against your hand as you pull him close, forehead against his, if only just to look into those deep brown eyes. If only to have him look back at you. 

You need to hear his voice brush against your ears, telling you how beautiful you are. How he’ll always keep you safe. How you’ll always be loved. 

You don’t know why you’re like this: needy, touch-starved, emotional. Could be a lot of things. The fact you’re the youngest, but the only one that can make a meal or clean a plate. Or how you’re the smallest but can take words like a punch in the face. 

Ultimately, you’re the college student, the one who made it, but you were dumb enough to let yourself get sucked back into the same bullshit you escaped from. You wonder if he knows what goes on behind those closed doors. How dysfunctional a house of four can be. 

Either way, it doesn’t matter. It would never work out.

Joel is only in his late-30s, but he’s still too old for you. More like, you’re too young for him. You’re just a kid in his eyes. A kid that grew up, but isn’t really grown-up. And he’s busy. He has work and a daughter to raise – you’d be one more thing to worry about.

And you have enough on your plate as well. It wouldn’t be fair to either of you. But life isn’t fair.

Having this time alone gives you a second wind, a chance to stop yourself from leaving once and for all. Here, you can sit outside away from your family and away from their expectations and demands. Here, you can stare at that house and think about another life, one that’s out of reach. And you’re okay with it because at least you’ll never be disappointed. 

“Mornin’ neighbor!” 

Your mind has been so busy and overcrowded with thoughts that you don’t even realize you’ve been staring at Joel who’s come out to collect his mail. He waves at you, a small smile tucked under his mustache. He’s walking toward you? 

 “Mr. Miller. Hi.” Heat flushes under your skin and you sit up straighter at his presence.

He almost looks nervous as he approaches you, “Hey, I, uh, was wonderin’ if you could do me a favor?” That southern twang slides off his tongue with every word and you just want to lick it up. 

Is that weird? 

Shit, he’s waiting for a response.

“S-sure, what do you need?” 

“It’s my brother’s birthday tomorrow so I’m taking him out for drinks tonight. I just need someone to watch over Sarah and the house.” He nods over to his place as if you didn’t know where he lived. “Usually, I have her go over to Adler’s but they’re out of town…”

“Oh, sure, of course, I can.”

“Really? The pay ain’t great.”

“You don’t need to pay me, Mr. Miller, you’ve done a lot for my family. I’m happy to help.” 

“I appreciate it, sweetheart.” He seems surprised but genuinely grateful, “Is 7 ok?” 

“I’ll be there.”

—

You get there at 6:55, not wanting to appear too enthused, but also wanting to be punctual. He gives you a smile when he opens the door, already dressed in a button-up and dark slacks.

“Thanks again for doing this, kid.” Kid.

“Yeah, sure.” 

He calls out to Sarah, who’s in her room, telling her he’d be back late and not to wait up. She yells back a muffled, “Got it, Dad. See you later!” 

“Don’t let ‘er stay up too late.” He says right before heading out. “She’s a good kid, but she can be persuasive.”

“Don’t worry, I got it covered from here.” 

You watch as he gets into his truck before closing the door. 

You never thought you’d actually enjoy babysitting a 14-year-old preteen. You expected sass or at least a face of indifference, but Sarah is different. She’s polite and easy to get along with. 

She says you’re a step up from hanging with Mrs. Adler and her mom, making dry oatmeal cookies, and watching Nana stare at the wall. 

You think it’s a compliment, so you take it as one. 

“You’re not so bad yourself, Mini Miller.” 

After making sure she did her homework (because you’re a responsible adult), you end up watching one of the Jurrasic Park movies while eating mac and cheese for dinner. It’s nice being able to relax, not tensing up whenever you hear footsteps approach you on creaky wooden floors. This is an escape for you even though it’s just you fulfilling a favor.

You glance at the time on the microwave. 11:47 pm. Way after bedtime. “Alright kid, I think it’s time to head to bed.”

“Kid? You’re only 7 years older than me!”

“Ugh, don’t remind me.” You pick up the dirty bowls and place them in the sink, “C’mon, your dad will kill me if I let you stay up any longer.”

She rolls her eyes, “No he wouldn’t”

 “Either way. Get on with it.” You give her a look that says, ‘don’t push me’. 

“Alright, alright. I’m going.”

—

It’s been quiet without Sarah around to talk to, and quite boring. You idly flip through channels, barely paying attention to what’s on as the volume is low enough that you’d have to hold your breath to hear it. It’s sometime around midnight, almost nearing 1 o’clock and the whole neighborhood is dark, not a single light on. 

You’re watching reruns of some sitcom when you hear his truck carefully pull into the driveway. The engine dies and the front door opens.

“You’re still here?”

You look at Joel from where you’re seating, “Yeah, just wanted to make sure you got home safe.” He nods, still standing there like he doesn’t know where to go now. “Sarah’s asleep… We made mac and cheese for dinner.” That caught his attention.

“Is there any left?”

“Should be, but it’s cold. It’s been in the fridge for a couple of hours.”

You watch him walk to the kitchen and rifle through the fridge. He gets out the container of saved pasta and then turns to you, the fridge door still open. “You want a beer or somethin’?”

You snort, “I’m only 20.” He shrugs at that. 

He sets out a bottle for himself, “Won’t tell anyone if you don’t. What’s one year, right?” 

“I–Ok.” He takes out another.

He doesn’t even bother to heat up the mac and cheese, just brings it over to the coffee table and sits next to you. “What’re we watching?”

“Um…Friends, I think.” He opens the beers, twisting them open easily, and passes one to you. “Thanks.” He answers you with a quick nod. 

You both watch the show silently as he eats, the show’s laugh track is a mere whisper in the air. You were actually planning on heading home when he returned, but now…it would be rude to – right?

And then there’s an ad break. 

“So how’s the family?” You tense from the question. 

“Fine, good.” You hope he doesn’t notice. 

“Really?” 

You nod, “Yeah.” You take a long sip of beer, a buffer to keep you from saying anything more. It’s bitter on your tongue and acrid at the back of your throat. You swallow it anyway. 

“And you? How have you been?” Me?

Sometimes you wonder if people know how questions like that can make or break a person. A simple, “Are you okay?”, could push you off the edge. And this is Joel that’s asking you. 

His gaze feels heavy on you as he watches your hands fiddle with your bottle anxiously. 

“I’m…good.” 

His eyebrows raise, “Good…really.” He sighs, “That’s all you got for me? You’re just ‘good’?” 

“Um…How about you Mr. Miller?”

“Tired.” You can see it in his eyes and that smile. You decide right then and there, you can’t tell him now. Even if the world is crumbling under you. You’re too young for him and he’s busy. “Glad I have the day off tomorrow.” You nod understandingly because that’s all you can offer. You wish you could do more.

“That’s good”

The show is back on, but neither of you turn back to it. The glow of the tv washes over your forms, locking you in place. 

“What’s up, honey?” He puts down his food, sitting it right on the edge of the coffee table. It’s a precarious position that lowkey freaks you out, but you’re more afraid of his words. “Is something wrong? Am I making you uncomfortable?” 

You follow his actions, setting down your bottle while also subtly shoving the container of pasta further onto the table. “Oh, n-no, Mr. Miller. I’m ok.” 

“Please, you can tell me.” His words are pulling you at you, peeling layers off of your practiced role. It’s hard to hold back. Maybe it’s time to leave…

“I–don’t…”

“Why are you still here?” This time the question isn’t asked with an air of surprise. This time he’s worried. You realize you aren’t getting out of this easily. You swear your lip will split with how hard you're biting down on it. “This is a safe space, sweetheart, say whatever you need to. I’ll listen.”

Just like that, you’re yanked off the edge. But now, you’re not as scared. Now you know he’ll be there to soften the fall. 

You talk slowly, careful to just ease along the edge of your feelings, “Sometimes…I don’t want to go home.” Just admitting that takes a huge weight off your shoulders. Joel readjusts his seating position and he’s now turned toward you. He’s listening. 

“Why not? Is something happenin’...?” Those gentle brown eyes urge you to continue.

“It’s–When I’m with my family, living feels like a chore.” It’s spilling, overflowing, “My brother just got out of jail, my mom’s a borderline alcoholic, and my dad is rarely home. I feel like I can’t breathe when I’m in there like I’m suffocating in my own makeshift box. I get angry at them and at myself, and then I’m guilty,” It’s pouring and you can’t stop it. “And t-then I feel lost,” Your voice cracks, but you’re too engulfed in everything to care, “because they’re all I’ve known. And I want them to change, god I do, but I also just want them to go away. I want to go away, even just for a little bit.” You don’t realize you’re crying until a warm droplet spills down your neck and under your t-shirt. 

“Come ‘ere.” He pulls you against him, letting you lean on his chest, not caring if your tears soak through his clothes. You let the tears fall now that you aren’t facing each other and they spill down your cheeks, hot and sticky. “It’s okay, honey. Just let it out.” A hand smooths against your back, comfortingly.

You could be crying from embarrassment as much as your emotional exhaustion. Or even about how good it feels to finally be comforted. 

His heartbeat is steady under you as well as each rise and fall of his chest. The soothing movement helps to calm you down until you’re just sniffling every so often.

“Have you ever been in a room full of people, but feel completely and utterly alone?” Your voice is hoarse and faint, slightly muffled as your cheek is pressed flush against his chest. 

His voice is soft, “I have.” 

Another sniffle. 

“I don’t want to be alone anymore, Joel.” Your head is tucked under his chin and nuzzled into his soft flannel. 

His hand your head off of him and he looks right into your eyes, palm cradling your cheek, “You’re not alone, honey.” He says it so quietly like it’s just for you to hear and no one else. 

You must look a mess, eyes red and nose snuffed, as you stare back at him. Your eyes glisten with tears and admiration like he’s the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen. And then they drop, below the honey eyes, and under his freckled nose. 

What would you have to give to get that kind of comfort?

You realize what you’re doing and look back up, face heating with flustered energy and embarrassment. His eyebrows are furrowed when you meet his eyes again. He has to know exactly what you were thinking.

God, you fucked it all up! 

You expect him to push you away…but he doesn’t. 

He leans in before you could say anything, pressing his lips gently against yours. It takes you a second to realize what was happening as held you and breathed you in. He’s kissing you. 

Your eyes flutter shut and you sigh into the kiss, eagerly pushing toward him to feel this skin flush against you. His lips are so soft as they brush against yours, careful to keep things slow and gentle as you ease into it. You whine softly as he pulls back, trying to chase his lips as he leaves. You can’t, he’s holding you back. 

He starts nipping and sucking at your plump lips lovingly before pushing back in to swallow down your gasps. His hands continue to cradle your jaw, guiding your head as he deepens the kiss, tongue gliding over your sensitive lips. You try to ignore the way his whiskers tickle your upper lip as he pushes into your mouth, tongue mingling and laving against yours like it’s his life source. 

“Joel.” 

His touch disappears. 

You pull away, dazed by his kiss. His taste. You wonder if he felt it too, that spark, that connection. The feel of his lips against yours is addicting and you’d do anything to do it again. 

When you meet his eyes, it’s clear he doesn’t feel the same. 

“...T-this was a mistake.”

“What–”

“Honey, I shouldn’t have done that.” He gets up off the couch. “You were distressed and I took advantage of it.” You start to shake your head, but you don’t get a word out. “I did and I apologize. Look, maybe these beers weren’t a good idea. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea…”

“Joel,” 

“It’s Miller.” Any glint of hope you once had is immediately snuffed out. 

“But, I wanted it.” 

“You don’t know what you want.” That hurts. He can tell. His eyes soften, “Can we just…pretend like that never happened?”

“Yeah. I-I understand, Mr. Miller.” You get up and collect your sweater and phone, leaving the barely-touched bottle on the coffee table. “I’ll…just go now. It’s way past my curfew anyway.” 

You anxiously try to walk around him to the front door, but he stops you with a hand on your shoulder. You freeze. 

“Just…be safe, okay?”

“Sure.”

You walk out.

[tansu-bomb]

Long post: Musings on AOS2 Ep3&4

Part 1: Yeong

The yearning of a young bride as her husband erects both physical & mental barriers between them.

Yeong sees how Uk has come through for her everytime she was in need. She is already moved by how Uk has cared for her with tenderness all night. And now, she sees him fight not just her mother but an entire establishment. She also senses that — despite Uk’s constant insistence that whatever he’s done is for his benefit and not hers — he isn’t entirely unaffected by her.

And so, as she is excited about spending a lifetime ahead with him, a nascent hope springs in her heart that longs for his unconditional affection. She wants to be chosen regardless of her divine powers or superior warrior skills or insanely good looks or rich/powerful family background.

She has a hunch that it was Uk that turned the lamp off at the Unanimous Assembly….that he took her home regardless of the proof he sought. When Uk is subsequently elated at the proof of her divine powers and says “I’m glad I brought you home”, her hunch is proven right.

And while “our-baby-is-the-evidence” was yet another one of her crazy, whimsical, on-the-spot solves, she is already quite comfortable with the idea of it becoming a reality. When he says “you’re surely not thinking of us getting intimate and making a baby”, it gives her a perfect opening to probe. When he flusters & blushes at her advances, her hunch - that he likes her - is getting further proven right.

Here she pretty much says “I really like you. Do you like me? I am hoping that you do.” Her eyes reveal her desire as her gaze lingers on his lips. He’s lost in her but forces himself to look away, pulls his guards up, and vehemently denies.

The rejection pains her but she doesn’t buy his lies. But the jerk that he decides to be — puts much-needed-for-his-sanity physical distance between them and says he can help fabricate some evidence for their marriage if only she stops hoping that he’d like her / give her his heart.

This hurts her more but she still doesn’t buy his lies or won’t take NO for an answer or will allow him to push her away. When she’s had enough of his bullshit, she shuts him up with a kiss. It’s basically a challenge “but I still like you. I dare you to feel nothing for me. If we create a witness, this is how we’ll do it”.

Uk is completely frustrated at this point coz she’s eroding boundaries rather swiftly. She’s kissing him, she’s talking about marital life and kids — all these are dreams he once dreamt with another woman. With her gone, and with no purpose to his bleak existence, he is willing to embrace death. And here’s his new wife pushing him towards life. So he erects physical barriers too.

He doesn’t enter her space when she’s conscious. He doesn’t let her enter his space either and pretends to not care for her. Then he stops going home altogether — especially as his mother & father figures urge him to let go of the past & give life with his new-wife a fair chance. All through this, she’s waiting, pining, completely missing him, loosing her apetite over him, and pushing open barrier after barrier only to not find him on the other side.

Despite his continuous rejections, she tries to piece together more information about him & Naksu from his friends/family, is puzzled at why noone seems to buy their marriage idea, is actively & persistently seeking avenues to reach out to him (like wanting to give him a status update on her regaining her memories/powers), and is trying to understand why he abandoned her.

Finally, she does understand why when he frantically rushes in hoping he’d meet Naksu & is super disappointed and angry that its her. She has known that he has a tragic past but didn’t know the depth of it all until now. Her heart begins to breaks into pieces as she realizes that it’s Naksu he still loves & yearns for….that he most cares about everything associated with Naksu - her stone grave, her memories, her jade, her reputation….that she is so secondary in his life and given how he continues to worship Naksu, she realizes there isn’t anything to look forward to in her marital life.

He not just rejects her coldly again but he reiterates that she’s just a tool for him — now with a new benefit unlocked where his selfish-ass can use her to relay his dead-lover’s memories back to him. Despite how heartbroken and jealous she is about his dead first-wife, she doesn’t resent him for loving another so ardently. If Naksu’s grave is important to him, she’ll spend the entire day fixing it. If he craves Naksu’s memories, she’ll keep the jade and endure the memories even if unpleasant for her to rewitness their love story. If Naksu’s reputation is contiunally being maligned, she’ll go along with her husband’s plan and fake-die so he/Naksu can be at peace. Even if she’s burning with jealousy, she’ll take home honey biscuits just like Naksu once did. And if he yearns for Naksu, she’ll unconditionally offer the comfort of her arms even if it breaks her heart that he doesn’t see her.

Despite their nasty fight & him still not returning home, what gives her hope through it all is Uk’s unspoken and spoken gestures — the way he lit up the forest path with fireflies and how he shadowed her to keep her from harm’s way, the way he wanted to look at her regardless of who she dressed up for, calling her pretty, calling her precious, calling her his wife.

These breadcrumbs & bugs are enough for her to gather courage and starts making inroads again — “Is it okay if I wore your family jewels? Is it okay to tell everyone that doesn’t believe in our marriage that we get along well? Is it okay to boast that you lit up a path with fireflies for me?”she asks to understand what boundaries he wants to keep / loose.

That he likes her a teensy bit is enough for her — for now atleast — and she positively glows & blushes at that. She’s really an innoncent, wide-eyed young wife yearning to make space for herself in her husband’s life. A space she well understands by now that she’ll need to share with his dead first-wife.

[suneeater]

I want the world to know. Hawks x reader.

✎a/n: really short one-shot with the one and only hawks!! i feel like he'd be the type to really want and show his s/o off,,, it's my first time writing him, but i had fun!!

✰warnings: n/a

You’ve been dating the Hawks for almost a year now. Except nobody knew it. As far as the public was concerned, the dashing young pro-hero was still available, snatching hearts from all directions.

It was your decision, the only request you had when you started dating. His fangirls are absolutely insane – they foam at the mouth at his every word and practically worship the ground he walks on (and the air he flies in). You’ve seen what happened to that pro-hero who got accused of flirting with Hawks. The poor soul was bombarded with hate-mail, all until Keigo noticed. Even then, the anonymous posts online never stopped. You didn’t need the fangirls breathing down your neck as well.

The world didn’t know about you, and you didn’t mind that at all. You enjoyed the quiet time you got to spend with Hawks, and you didn’t have to be worried about his fangirls at all. You weren’t jealous either. You got to see a side of him they never did. He was all yours.

A regular date night consisted of three things: takeout, a series you’re watching together and an attention-seeking Keigo. This time was no different; while waiting for the food to arrive, the young hero made himself comfortable in your lap, humming pleasantly as you pet his hair. He sends a few of his feathers when the doorbell rings, spooking the food delivery person and bringing the food to the living room without even lifting a finger.

“I’ve been thinking…” he starts after a while, mouth full of fried chicken. You grimace and slap his shoulder lightly.

“Don’t talk with your mouth full.”

“Sorry,” he swallows, and wipes his greasy hands against his shirt. You roll your eyes. He’s doing it on purpose to mess with you.

The blond looks at you with a strange glint in his eyes, just seconds before throwing himself at you. The two of you are enveloped by his red wings, and a boyish grin makes its way onto his face. It’s a face you recognize, one that he makes only when he’s very excited by something. He made the same face moments before asking you to be his partner.

“I’ve been thinking,” he repeats, voice shaking with glee. “I want the world to know about us. About you and how much I love you.”

“Keigo, I-”

“I want to scream it out into the world, about how all I need is you. I want them to know I’m yours. And I want others to know you’re mine.”

“Oh? I thought you like the attention you get from your fans,” you tease, knowing fully well how stressed out he gets because of them. He violently shakes his head.

“The fans are too much most of the time. Also, Miruko didn’t believe me when I told her I’m dating the best and most wonderful person in the universe. She thinks I’m going insane. Well… She’s not wrong. I’m going insane with my love for you~ “ Keigo announces with half-lidded eyes and a love-struck grin. You’re too flustered to say another word and push his face away jokingly.

The silence is filled with the muffled sound of the television series still playing in the background. Hawks’ wings wrap around you just a bit tighter and you feel yourself relax. You always liked when he did that. It made you feel safe.

Keigo nervously leans closer to your face. Grabbing your hands with his shaky ones.

“N-not directly of course, not immediately. I was thinking about like a soft launch. You know, I hint that I’m not single anymore, the fans calm down a bit...”

“Okay,” you hum.

“I mean, it’s okay if you don’t want to, I completely respect that- wait, okay?!”

“Yes,” you laugh. “My family has been dying to meet the mystery man I’ve been dating as well so…”

“Ah, thank you, thank you, thank you so much!" The hero peppers your face with kisses and his wings unwrap excitedly. He’s so happy about it, he starts to ramble: “I can’t wait to show you around my agency… and oh! You have to meet Endeavor, he’s such a funny guy! Sure, he seems like he’d rather be anywhere else in the world at first glance, but trust me when I tell you he loves me. Miruko is going to love you too! You’re going to get along so well; I just know it. Not too well though, I don’t want her stealing you away from me.” He pouts cutely at the idea of the rabbit hero snatching you up and running away.

“She won’t. I’m all yours,” you chuckle and pull him into a sweet kiss.

Later that day, the official social media account of the pro-hero Hawks posts a photo of two intertwined hands, one of them being clearly his. The caption reads: I’ve been keeping a secret :3

The internet goes wild.