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aphroditesmoon · 4 months

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wish you'd ask me

clarisse la rue x fem!demigod!reader

summary: you're not good at reading subtle hints, clarisse realises that maybe she should've been more upfront with her feelings for you.

warnings: fluff, oblivious!reader, clarisse is down bad, reader is very neurodivergent coded, kissing, flirting, title n fic inspired by 'Wish You'd Ask Me' by Matt Maltese.

A/N: thank you for 1.9k followers!! I love you all dearly, my ask box and dms r always open, im glad that my writing is being enjoyed by so many people<3

wc: 4.5k

You have been in camp half blood for more than 4 years. You have made yourself at home for the last several years.

It was easy to view yourself as lesser or inadequate in comparison to other mortals during your days in the real world before you were sent to camp. The world has never failed to remind you of how different you were. Always too much or not good enough, always special and never normal

And it wasn't like you were dying for some sort of diagnosis to justify why you are the way you are, but upon discovering that you were actually a demigod, it felt like all the questions you've been harboring to yourself was finally answering themselves.

Everything clicked. Everything made sense, though at the same time, it felt impossible. You were a very confused little girl when you first arrived at camp. A girl who just wanted someone to tell them that it'll all be alright in the end.

And you still remembered the first person to hold you by your shoulders and made you look into their eyes as they told you that it was all going to be okay.

The girl with beautiful long curls and dark piercing eyes. The girl that everyone else, apparently, was afraid of.

But you could never be afraid of Clarisse La Rue.

Not with the way she smiles when every time she sees you, the way she never fails to make you feel included even in activities you're not capable of participating in. Not with the way your whole body electrifies every time your skin touches, when your hands brush against each other.

It didn't matter what anyone think, because no one could change the perception you've built of her. Clarisse La Rue is good. Or at least she is to you.

When you first heard of the rumours surrounding her, you did think better than to force a friendship on her. You strayed away from her and stuck to your cabin siblings and your books, but you noticed daily how she'd still go out of her way to talk to you at least once a day.

It didn't need to be a long conversation, just a passing acknowledgement. An easygoing 'hey, how've you been doing.' Sometimes she'd even go as far as cracking a joke with you.

With how serious her face is whenever she make the jokes, you'd have to think twice as hard and thrice as faster than another person to try and guess if she was being genuine or not so you could fit in a necessary laugh when you needed to.

Even as her anger became more apparent because of the new kid's accidental climb to fame and embarrassing the Ares' cabin, she still found time to make a conversation with you.

It had been long since you tried to ignore or avoid her. You learned that her attention towards you is harmless, and that she seemed much more comfortable telling you certain things compared to others. If she has been viewing you as some sort of safe box, then you don't really mind it. You liked listening to her talk and keeping her heart's intent as your secret.

You too, talking to her. To some people, you are reserved,

and to others, talkative. Either way, people find it easy to discard you at any moment they decide you are irritating.

But Clarisse listens. And she asks questions, she's patient- much patient that anyone could anticipate or guess.

It may be hard for others to believe, but Clarisse is more complex than she seems. She had the capacity to be gentle, and she had the capacity to respect boundaries. The more time you spent with her, the more that side becomes easy for you to access.

Today, however, marks a new record for your friendship with her. A few weeks ago, she had informed you of her newfound interest in the history of folklore monsters. What a coincidence that you were currently self-studying on that specific topic.

She insisted that you hook her in on whatever it is you're learning. She had even gotten you a doughnut to eat together outside the library as you told her of your insights of dragons and their theorized blindness and incapability to differentiate a variety of prey.

The conversation went well, she seemed immensely in awe of your knowledge and had no problem telling you how she felt.

You even gave her some book recommendations, though you knew she wasn't much of a reader.

You felt a shift in your relationship that night and had spent the next three days studying more and more about the topic. And today, you had asked her to spend the evening with you.

You shouldn't feel so nervous asking her to hang out. That is what friends do, after all.

She found you in the library, sitting on the floor in between two large bookshelves. She had been right on time and enthusiastically so. The two of you sat together, hidden by the shelves as some semblance of privacy.

Clarisse looked confused when you had explained that you indeed wanted to spend the rest of the day in the library, but she accompanied you anyways.

You could never get sick of the smell of the books. Old and new, they all have some nostalgic past tied in between the pages, begging to be discovered.

You had your back on the walls with tinted windows above your head as she's seated opposite of you in a criss-crossed position.

Today, the library isn't as packed as usual. There were still people walking in and out and checking out the books on the counter, but not too many that it became obnoxiously loud and annoying.

After finishing another book of Monsters and how to spot them, you're feeling knowledgeable enough to explain the lore of the Giants to Clarisse, she had asked you about this the other day, giants have been long extinct to the point that some might even say they may have never even existed. And so you were interested in sharing with her all of the information you have learned about the majestic species of a beast.

You started with the general information. The basic understanding of what a Giant is the mythhs of Giants and the validity of those sources. Clarisse listened closely in the beginning, never interrupting you unless she had an actual question.

She seemed in awe of the stories you tell her of. You don't blame her, for you yourself have been most interested in the topic of Giants.

You were an hour an a half in when noticed her attention faltering. She leaned against the cases of books, her eyes twitched slightly when you began to explain the different types of giants, and the difference of how they operate.

Her hands are folded together on her lap, and you can feel her listening in on everything you're telling her as she adds in some commentary here and there, but you also felt that she wasn't entirely in on the conversation.

The dim lights of the library made the atmosphere feel warm and secluded, even with its vast space and many other campers hanging around in the other tables and shelves. You made sure to keep your voice low as you spoke in fear of the librarian kicking you out.

You had a good reputation with the library workers, they liked how organized and polite you were.

"A lot of people think their greatest strength is their size, which is valid, they are huge, but their real weapon is their mouth." You told Clarisse, ignoring the litter of books by your left that you had brought over for reference.

"They kiss you to death?" She asks suspiciously. You laughed shortly and shook your head. "No, I mean their breath."

She responds with an 'ohh.'

"They're giants, so their mouth is large too, and you can easily tell what they had for breakfast even from their tall height. Their breaths are also known to be so rancid it could kill you, because they don't exactly eat what we eat."

She raises a brow as she stretches her hands upwards. "Isn't that ogres?"

"It's both." You confirmed.

You were about to continue your explanation but halted by instinct as you notice how her mouth keeps pursing together as if unsatisfied, and she has that look on her face that mimicked a confused expression. You're don't think there's anything to be confused of.

"Are you okay?" You asked her worriedly. Clarisse sits up straighter at the question and waved a hand off to assure you she's fine. "Of course, no yeah- I'm fine."

"You seem bored, you're not really interested in what I'm saying are you?” She opens her mouth to counter your words but hesitates to say anything.

"I- well, I like giants-" She attempts, "-no you don't. "

"No. I don't." She admits with a sigh. "But I thought you said you were interested in these kind of stuff?" You questioned her. "Well, yeah, like the general idea of it. I mean, I don't hate it, and I like hearing you talk about it." She answers with a shrug.

"Then why do you look disappointed? If you didn't want to come, you could've just told me. I wouldn't get mad." You told her honestly. It was conflicting for you to see her so confused on what to say, being so picky with the words she chooses.

You figured she's probably reluctant to hurt your feelings. That is a notion you're used to. You'd rather she tell you the truth to your face than to be catered around like a time ticking bomb that everyone's so afraid might explode at any time.

"When you asked me out yesterday, you told me this would be an 'evening to remember." She tells you with such confidence like it was an explanation to her weird behaviour today.

"You don't think this is an evening to remember?" You sincerely inquire.

"No, I do! I just- well, when you said that I didn't think you'd mean we'd be doing this." Your frown deepens as you try to figure out what she means, eyeing her body language closely. “What do you mean? I told you I wanted to hang out.”

A part of you is offended. She was the one who had said she liked hearing you speak, why would she be disappointed that this was your idea of spending time together?

"I don't know, I thought we'd just be doing...something else?"

It didn't matter what she had really meant with that. You felt completely embarrassed once she finished her sentence. Why was it that everyone else had no problem having long conversations with their friends, but when it came to you, it's all too awkward, unnecessary, and odd?

You liked Clarisse, you considered her your friend. Sometimes you wonder if it could ever be more, but you never entertain those thoughts because you don't want to ruin what the two of you already have.

But moments like these resemble a huge slap in the face by the universe.

You couldn't even be good friends with her, how ridiculous of you to think that there could ever be something more.

"Okay, um, maybe we should just go back to our cabin." You decided whilst standing up and picking up the stack of books you're currently borrowing from the library, ready to leave the place without waiting for her.

"Hey, wait." She called out as you walked past her. You spared her a glance, trying your best not to show how upset you are. “We're friends." She says it so much like a question that you weren't sure if she's even sure of the fact herself until she continued speaking. "I like hanging out with you."

Another thing that you weren't sure if she really meant. "Sure." You replied thinking it's the most suitable response.

Before she could say anything else, you turned around and started picking up your pace until you disappeared out of her sight.

—

You have been consistently ignoring Clarisse. Which proved to be harder than expected.

When you pass by her camp or the training ground, you make a mental note to always look down or to your front as to never accidentally cross eyes with her.

And everytime you hear her call out your name, you keep walking like you didn't even hear her, knowing that she wouldn't be bold enough to call for you again. After all, she still had a reputation to uphold.

If ignoring her wasn't hard enough, having to deal with how you felt for her is worse.

You've been avoiding confrontation with yourself for weeks even before you decided to go no contact with her.

And so far, you thought you've been handling it pretty well. Except for days where you don't see her where she's expected to be. You tell yourself that you don't care as you make your way to training in the day and reading in the evening, and yet you still go back on your own words when you asked a passerby Ares kid on where his cabin leader was.

"She's dunking some kid's head into a toilet bowl." Of course she was.

You thanked the dude and went back on your way to your cabin. It's close to dusk, the sky is turning orange and the sun is dipping itself below the earth. You take your time returning to your cabin as you enjoy the way the sun slowly removes itself from anyone's viewing.

You wondered to yourself if things like these are what makes you weird or off-putting to some people.

Was enjoying nature and having niche interests only cute when it's done by girls pretty enough to be cool or if it's only in romance movies or books.

You don't find yourself weird, in fact you think all of your hobbies are pretty common and usual, and yet the way Clarisse had spoken to you at the library last week had made you feel unnatural.

You had wanted to do normal people things with her, but maybe your perception of normal is different to her.

Either way, you are pretty hurt with how she reacted. You loved her still, of course. It's kind of hard to unlike the girl you've been obsessed with since you were 15.

Once you finally reach your cabin, you quickly put down all of your books and your tiny sling back by the side before making it to the shower to refresh yourself before dinner.

You thought it hilarious of how hard you're trying not to care about Clarisse, and yet as you're cleaning yourself up, changing your clothes and attempting to read at least 15 pages of your World's Most Dangerous Beasts book, you could only think of her.

What would it take for her to think that you're cool, what kind of things did she want to do instead of listening to you yap around for 2 hours on what is an equivalent of a boring dinosaur facts, not that you really think dinosaurs are boring.

During dinner, you kept to siblings and had to make yourself finish your plate as your anxiety wrecking thoughts have a way of deriving you of an appetite. You also had to convince yourself to not search for her at the other tables which took more strength than one would expect.

But you succeeded, and you were now sure that the only obstacle left for the day was to try and fall asleep without the thoughts of her keeping you up.

Clarisse is a force, a fierce daughter of Ares, and a cabin leader who had much better things to do then hole up at quiet small places with you.

And just because she was nice enough to mantain a good relationship with you for 4 years, does not mean that you're worth her time. Or at least that's what you tell yourself.

That night, you managed to fall asleep after an hour of recalling Harpy facts in repetition. Counting sheeps had never worked on you, so you had to find something much more active to tire out your brain.

You dreamed of Clarisse with her hair down, holding your hand and pulling you closer so she could slip a flower on your ear.

And just as she's looking down at you, moving closer to do what it seemed like to kiss you, you awoke with a jolt, swearing under your breath as if you'd just gotten jumpscared by a ghost.

Someone's palms moved to shut your lips as you're met with a girl, hovering over you in the dark. Clarisse's dark eyes were recognizable, but it sent a shot of adrenaline through your body still.

"Shh." She whispered to your face, hand still keeping your mouth shut. "I'm going to remove my hands now." She whispered again. You nod in understanding and waited for her to pry her hand away from your face.

"What are you doing here?!" You exclaimed as quiet as possible as she helped you sit up.

"I'm sneaking you out." She answers with a wink. "It's 2 in the morning." You waved your hand around at the darkness and sleeping children. "3 in the morning, and yeah, I know. That's why it's called sneaking around." She corrects you with a grin so devilish that if you hadn't known her for a long time, you'd assume she's about to turn you into a new toilet bowl or dumpster boxing victim.

You sighed loudly and glared at her despite your fast beating heart. Her hand remained on top of yours until the minute becomes more awkward and she removes it as if she just remembered that she's been holding your hand.

Without explanation, she climbed out of your bed and tiptoes to the open cabin door. You're still sitting up and looking at her with conflicted feelings.

Only after she turns back to you, cocking her head towards the entrance, do you give into her request and softly leave the comfort of your bed and trail after her.

"Where are we going?" You asked after her as she kept walking. Instead of responding, she asks you another question back, "Can you swim?"

"We're going swimming?" You watch her shrug in return from behind her and became even more distressed.

"So, is this your idea of having fun and hanging out then?" She laughs drily and slowed down so you could catch up. You walked fast enough until you're beside her and waited for her to talk. "You sound surprised, I would've thought that after 4 years of friendship, you'd know by now that I love doing things that includes active movements."

You did know that, it's a bit hard to not notice how much working out, training and running fuels her even more.

"And why are we doing it in the middle of the night?" The walk towards the lake by the back of the forest was short, considering that your cabin is the closest to the location.

You almost tripped and fell over a stick, but Clarisse was quick to scoop you back up by the back of your shirt. "Thanks." You mumbled to her. "And you haven't answered my question."

Clarisse pulled her shirt over her head and tossed it on the ground without caring of your presence. You, having more moral obligations than her, twisted your face to your left when she began to pull her trousers off. "Too many people in broad daylight." She tells you.

That is a valid reason, this lake is mostly known as a hook up spot, and true to it's cause, many dating campers have been caught together here during dawn or late evenings.

You braved yourself to turn towards her again slowly and realised that she had already hopped into the water. She had a sports bra on and a boxer.

And though you yourself had a tank top and shorts on, you contemplate the idea of suicide as a better choice than having to strip in front of her.

"Are you gonna get in, or are you just gonna gawk at me from there?" You were grateful for the dark being able to hide your flushed face from her, but deep down, you knew that she probably saw it anyways because of the shining bright moonlight.

"I can't swim." You told her.

"That's fine, the water's not very deep." You ransacked your brain for reasons to decline her offer, but at the same time, a small part of you yearned to take this risk that you've been so afraid of for gods knows whatever reason.

Clarisse is there, in the water and under the moonlight. You are only a few steps away from her. And like she said, the water isn't deep, only waist length. She stares back at you with a raised brow like she's challenging you to join her.

"Turn around first." You tell her. She smirked slightly before slowly spinning to the opposite direction. "You know I've seen you naked before right?"

"What?" You choked out, aghast. "Who do you think changed your clothes for you when you first got to camp." Oh, that.

Your shoulder relaxes as you realize she's talking about the first time you met. "That's was a long time ago." You noted. She hummed im agreement. "Yeah, we've both grown since."

You told her she could turn around once you're inside the water. Forgetting about the heighy difference between you two, the water was high enough to reach your chest, trying your best not to trip underwater the way you always do on dry ground, your hand instinctively reached outnfor her shoulder.

Clarisse held your forearm tightly and drew your closer to her until you're inches away from eachother.

You breathed in sharply and felt the need to fill in the awkward silence. "So, you...like swimming, huh?"

"Yes, evidently so." She answered. "Right right, can't sit still and all that." She actually chuckled at your sarcasm, making you proud of yourself.

"You know, even before I came to camp Half Blood, I use to be a pretty active person, running track, volleyball, sometimes swimming." Your eyes widened in curiosity. "Really?" She nodded.

"The counselor told my mom that I just had so many untapped energy, which I guess is a code for anger issues." Her grip on your forearm moves higher until her palm is over your shoulder. "She told her that it'd be best for me to find a...healthy way, to channel that energy, and for my strong competitiveness. So I joined what I could, and that's how I spent most of my free time there. Besides, I never was that good academically. So, I ought to at least be good at something, right?"

"You are good." You blurted out. Your embarrassment faded away when you saw her smile. "You think so?"

"Yeah." You assured her. Her other hand had snaked around your waist without you noticing. Only when you moved slightly do you notice her holding you softly.

"The moon is really nice tonight, isn't it?" You said, trying to diffuse the tension. You pointed your finger up to the sky at the singular white orb.

She glanced up and let out a 'huh.'

"I like it when it's bright and whole like this, the moon in all of its glory. You don't even notice the starts around it when it's glowing like that." You could stare at the moom forever, even longer than the way you've been staring at the sun.

You believed in it the way children do with their birthday candle. To you, the moon has always been a symbol of hope or comfort for your future. Your fascination for it existed from when you were a child, the way it'd follow you from behind as you gazed upon it from the back of the car seat whilst your parent drove down the road.

The way it moved above you as you walked home from school, like one of the gods themselves watching over you.

"Nothing compares to the moon." You announced aloud, watching as the clouds around it began to gather over it. "Yeah, It's beautiful." You hear Clarisse speak.

As your head snapped back to her, you found that she had already been facing you.

"I like the moon...but not as much as I like you." She whispered loud enough for your ears only. Her face leans closer to yours, your noses brushing together. "Not as much as I like to hear your voice, when you tell me about your little harpy facts-"

"Oh, I haven't told you about the harpies yet." You cut her off. "I just finished that chapter this morning actually and-"

"-and, you can tell me about it after I'm done talking." You blushed and became silent, letting her speak.

Clarisse exhaled breathily, fanning your face with the subtle warm air. "I like doing things that friends do with you, but I don't want to be your friend anymore."

"Oh."

"I want to be more than friends." She elaborated.

"Oh." Oh.

You feel a sudden tightness in your chest, from anxiety or from butterflies is undecided. "You want to be best friends?" You joked, laughing nervously.

Clarisse snorted at your joke, but she was still grinning widely. "Best friends, If that's what you want to call it."

There was a moment of understanding shared between a second of shared gazes before her lips attached themselves to yours. An urgency, approval, meaning that can't be described by words.

Whatever gentleness there was inside of her before had vanished. Clarisse kissed you like a starved woman. Her lips craved yours like it'd be the last time she'll ever know how you taste like.

Your hands clasped on her shoulder and neck for support as she embraced you tighter to her body. You let her tongue slip into your mouth, meeting your own.

And as they danced together, inhaling all there is in your lips, every secret and every confession that have died on the tip ofnyour tongues, you are sure that no heaven nor hell could tear you open to see you back together like this.

You push her back abruptly, letting fresh air fill your empty lungs. "What's wrong?" Clarisse inquired worriedly.

"Last week." You sighed out, chest still heaving as your thoughts clicked together. "You thought I had asked you on a date, that's why you were disappointed."

She winced at the reminder, and for the first time in your life, you had been lucky enough to witness a flustered Clarisse.

"I'm right." Her silence confirmed. "Oh Clarisse, why didn't you just ask me?"

Huffing loudly, she rolls her eyes in irritation. "I thought I was obvious enough. "

Thinking back on it all, it did seem pretty obvious, but gods were you oblivious. The way you intepreted it all so wrongly.

"I've liked you for so long too." You admitted to her. Her scowl was gone at that, replaced by a teasing smile. "And what are you gonna do about it?" Her mouth returned to yours, letting go of all your fears and holding on to Clarisse like she's your anchor, you close the gap between your lips, welcoming the kind of pleasure that you've never tasted before.

#clarisse la rue #clarisse la rue x reader #pjo series #pjo x reader #pjo #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackson #dior goodjohn #wlw

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poetsblvd · 8 months

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fic recs ﹐ ( charles leclerc x reader )

— key . fluff (❀) angst (✿) smau (❁) mature (❃) —

leclercs type (❀) @thebearchives

always, evermore, even after and still (❁) @love-belle

it’s never over (❀) (❃) @leclsrc

fix what has been broken (❁) @lorarri

you’ll change your name, or change your mind (✿) @monzabee

heartbreak on tour series (❁) @twobluejeans

right timing (✿) (❀) @moneymasnn

baby leclerc series (❀) @starkwlkr

lightning mclover (❀) @f1version

10 seconds (❀) @lxclerc

itch (❃) @monzamash

this is what it feels like (❁) @love-belle

sweet pea (❀) @leclsrc

delicate series (✿) (❀) (❁) @redclercs

north star series (✿) (❀) @harley-sunday

amour rose (❁) @cartierre

cherry tomato (❀) @xxblairexxss

to live for the hope of it all (❁) @pierregazly

una noche en monaco (✿) (❀) (❃) @charlesswife

sparks (❀) @writingstoraes

a house, a home (✿) @vetteltea

saw your mom at the grocery store (❁) @love-belle

it’s called love (❀) (✿) @racinggirl

honeymoon (❃) @lecsainz

what would you say (if i told you i loved you) (❁) @cieloclercs

what could’ve been (✿) @norrisleclercf1

pardesi girl (❁) @fleetwooods

i’d never walk cornelia street again (❁) @love-belle

night tea and tears (❀) (✿) @httpiastri

the seasons of love series (❀) (✿) (❃) @formulaforza

pretty visitors (❀) @strawberrysainz

still writing pages (✿) @leclercsbunny

royal series (❁) @maryleclerc

lonely call (✿) @lxclerc

for sentimental reasons (❀) (✿) (❃) @deadaydreams

the delicate series (❀) (✿) @fleetwooods

when it rains it pours (✿) @silverszobo

you gotta move, or move on (✿) @formulaforza

thirsty thoughts (❃) (❁) @lorarri

you’re losing me (✿) @oconso

why we broke up (✿) @charlesluvr

shoulder to lean on (✿) (❀) @silverszobo

ma moitié (❀) (✿) @thebearchives

the winner takes it all series (✿) @silverstonesainz

stories old and true (❀) (❃) @cherry-leclerc

i have forgotten (✿) (❃) @cherry-leclerc

lily’s notes , if i studied for half the time i spent on tumblr i’d be a genius. but this is more fun and i slowly find myself tumbling down the tumblr black hole and re-experiencing my old fav fics that i’ve stumbled across again , and omg wow im having so much fun making fic recs so expect a lot more !! so this is the charles rec list aka the current f1 poster boy , max rec list next !! thank you to all the amazing writers for pushing their hard work onto these masterpieces mwah xx

#౨ৎ my recs #charles leclerc x reader #charles leclerc x you #charles leclerc fic recs #charles leclerc fic #charles leclerc x y/n

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itsmealaiah · 2 months

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(close as i could get to a johnnie kissing photo besides jake im sorry 😭)

Summary: when johnnie is too exhausted to be dominant during sex after a long day, you help him instead.

TW: handjob, profanity, AFAB reader, dirty talk, sucking off, head (m rec), p in v sex, unprotected sex (don't do that 🖤), riding sub johnnie, overstimulation (m rec)

Request: Hiii Could you do a johnnie fic where he's super submissive and needy, also with edging maybe

Rating: 18+, mdni

WC: 1.5k

Johnnie, a short, lanky man, trudged wearily through the door of your shared apartment. His short, dark hair was disheveled, and his normally sharp features were drawn and pale from exhaustion. He'd been editing all day, his mind constantly racing. Now, all he wanted was to relax and unwind, to shed the weight of his responsibilities and be taken care of for once.

As he stepped into the living room, he spotted you, sitting on the couch.

Perfect.

Johnnie let out a long, weary sigh and made his way over to the couch, collapsing onto it with a heavy thud. "God, I'm beat," he muttered, stretching his legs out in front of him. He glanced over at you, his expression softening.

You smiled warmly, setting aside the book you'd been reading. "aw babe. How was your day?" You asked, making sure your voice was gentle and soothing.

He sighed again, rubbing his eyes before looking up at you. "It was… intense. I feel like my brain is fried." He yawned widely, revealing his sharp teeth. "I just need some rest and… attention." His voice trailed off, his cheeks flushing slightly.

You nodded understandingly, moving closer to him on the couch. "Well, I'm here for you. Why don't we start with a massage?" You offered, reaching out to gently knead the knots in his shoulders. "That always helps me relax."

Johnnie moaned softly, his muscles relaxing under your skilled hands. "Mm, that feels good…" He let his head fall back, closing his eyes as he reveled in the sensation. "You're so good at this." He breathed out shakily, his cock beginning to stiffen beneath his pants. "You really know how to take care of me."

As your fingers dug deeper, you could feel his body begin to unwind. "Do you want me to keep going?" You asked, leaning closer to him. "Or would you like something else?" You let your hand slip lower, tracing circles around his hardening erection through his clothes.

He let out a soft groan, arching his back. "Yes, please," he murmured, his hips moving involuntarily toward your hand. "I… I could use a little more attention." His voice was breathy and needy. "I'm so tired of being in charge all the time."

You smiled sympathetically, understanding his need for release. "Don't worry," you assured him. "I've got you." With that, you stood up and stripped off your shirt, revealing your toned, muscular chest. You knelt down in front of him, undoing his top and pushing it off his shoulders. His erection sprang free, straining against the fabric of his pants.

You reached down and undid his belt, then slowly pulled down the zipper. His cock sprang out, already leaking precum. You took it in your hand, feeling its weight and heat as you stroked it slowly. "Just relax," you murmured, leaning in to kiss the tip of his cock. "Let me take care of you."

Johnnie moaned, arching his back further into your touch. "God, yes…" he breathed, his hips beginning to move in time with your strokes. "I've been so tense all day… I need this." He tangled his fingers in your hair, pulling you closer as you continued to stroke him expertly.

You looked up at him, catching his eye. His pupils were dilated, his lips parted in a soft, slack expression of pleasure. "Do you want me to stop?" you asked, teasingly.

He shook his head, a groan escaping his lips. "No, keep going…" He gripped the couch cushion beneath him as your strokes became faster and more urgent. "I'm so close…" He gasped, his hips bucking wildly as he came, hot cum spilling over your hand and onto his stomach.

You continued to stroke him, helping him through his orgasm, until he lay panting and spent beneath you. "There you go," you whispered, leaning forward to kiss him tenderly. "That's better." You wiped your hand on the couch cushion, making sure to get all the cum off.

Johnnie smiled weakly, his chest heaving as he caught his breath. "Thank you… I needed that." He looked down at his semi-hard cock, still twitching slightly. "You really know how to… take care of me."

You smiled back, feeling a sense of satisfaction at having helped him relax. "I'm glad I could," you said, moving back to sit beside him on the couch. "But you're still pretty wound up. Maybe we should..try again?." you asked with a wicked grin.

Johnnie's eyes widened, and he let out a shaky breath. "Are you sure?" he asked, his voice barely above a whisper. "I don't want to overdo it…"

You took his hand in yours and squeezed gently. "Don't worry, I'll make sure you're taken care of," you assured him. "And I'll make sure you enjoy every second of it." You leaned in closer, kissing him softly on the lips before kissing down to his v line, leaving a trail of kisses.

As you took him into your mouth, you could feel his cock harden even more in your hand. You sucked gently at first, teasing him, before increasing the intensity and speed. You let your tongue dance around the head, flicking over the sensitive bundle of nerves. His hips bucked, and he let out a hoarse moan. His hands tangled in your hair, pulling gently as he surrendered to the sensation.

You could feel the heat emanating from his cock as you took him deeper, the salty taste of his precum filling your mouth. He thrust into your mouth, meeting your rhythm, his breath coming in ragged gasps. The muscles in his thighs tensed, and his balls drew up tight against his body. You could feel the impending release building inside of him, and you redoubled your efforts, determined to send him over the edge.

With a low growl, he came, pulsing hot cum into your mouth. You swallowed greedily, relishing the taste as he trembled and twitched beneath you. When he finally regained his breath, he looked down at you with a mixture of gratitude and desire. "holy shit" he began, before trailing off, unable to find the words.

You smiled up at him, your cheeks still flushed from the effort of taking him so deep. "You taste so good," you murmured, running your tongue over your lips. His cock twitched in your hand, still hard. How the fuck was he? Whatever. "you're not done yet. I bet you have a lot more energy to give." You guided his cock into you, sliding up and down, creating a rhythm.

His eyes widened as he looked up at you, and he groaned, thrusting harder. His hands found purchase on your hips, gripping tightly as he began to move in earnest, fucking your pussy with long, hard strokes. You moaned around him, meeting his rhythm, taking him deeper with every thrust. His cock felt impossibly thick inside of you, stretching you to the limit. The friction between your bodies was almost unbearable, but in the best possible way.

As you moved together, you could feel the tension building inside of him again, his thrusts becoming more urgent. You leaned in, kissing him deeply, your tongue dancing with his as he held you close. His hands moved up to cup your breasts, squeezing them roughly. You arched your back, pressing your nipples against his palms as you rode him harder. The sensation of him filling you, of being so completely stretched by him, was exquisite.

He moaned into your neck, his grip on your hips tightening as he thrust harder. His cock seemed to swell inside you, filling every inch of your tight channel. You could feel him building towards his climax, the tension growing with every thrust. You wanted nothing more than to bring him to the edge, to feel him spill his release deep inside you.

You began to rock your hips, meeting his thrusts with an urgency that mirrored his own. You reached down between your legs, rubbing your clit roughly as you felt your own orgasm building. The sensation of him inside you, the friction of your skin against his, was almost too much to bear. You arched your back, crying out his name as you came, your body shuddering with pleasure.

As your orgasm subsided, you felt him lose control, his thrusts becoming erratic and desperate. His cock throbbed inside you, and with a hoarse cry, he emptied himself, filling you with hot cum. His weight pressed down on you, his breath hot on your neck as he came down from the high. For a moment, you could feel the aftershocks of his orgasm pulsing through your body as well.

You lay there, spent and satisfied, as he caught his breath. His cock twitched inside you, softening but not yet retreating. He rolled off you, onto his back, and pulled you into his arms. You nestled your head against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart. "God, I love you," he murmured, his voice still breathless. "you fuck so good." You wrapped your arms around him, feeling the warmth of his skin against yours.

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I haven't read any STEVE/BUCKY FIC in the last five years or so (Endgame really burned me hard), BUT I can at least offer what I read up to that point! Most of my recs are from around when Captain America: The Winter Soldier first came out (some from before, so there's a few speculation fics) and then I was ready semi-regularly up through Inifinity War, so these may be a bit dated but also the fandom had some ABSOLUTE BANGER fics from that era! I mostly read from about 2014 to 2019 and I can't say how well many of these held up, but I know my tastes haven't changed that much, so there should hopefully be something for anyone interested here! Anyway, I think I'm finally Not As Mad As I Once Was enough to read fic again/celebrate the 10th anniversary of TWS, but also let's be clear. I will forever hold a grudge about what Marvel did with Steve and Bucky post-TWS, that was bullshit from start to finish. ESPECIALLY the finish, oh my god okay so I'm still Actually That Mad and-- NO, OKAY, HAVE SOME FIC RECS BEFORE I MELT DOWN AGAIN.

CAPTAIN AMERICA FIC RECS YOU'LL FIND HERE:

STEVE/BUCKY SHIP FICS

STEVE/BUCKY - PRE-THE WINTER SOLDIER SPECULATION

STEVE/BUCKY - POST-THE WINTER SOLDIER

STEVE/BUCKY - POST-INFINITY WAR

STEVE & BUCKY-CENTRIC FICS (WITH A LITTLE OF EVERYONE ELSE, TOO)

STEVE&BUCKY&CAST - POST-THE WINTER SOLDIER

CAPTAIN AMERICA: STEVE/BUCKY FIC RECS: ✦ Brooklyn, Brooklyn, Take Me In by victoria_p (musesfool), steve rogers/bucky barnes + natasha romanoff, reunion fic, 4.1k Bucky finds himself, and then he finds Steve. ✦ you got blood on your hands (and i know it’s mine) by nighimpossible, steve rogers/bucky barnes + natasha romanoff + brief mention of sam wilson/natasha romanoff, suicidal ideation, 2.9k Bucky refuses to see Steve after his deprogramming. ✦ take all you can carry by havisham, steve/bucky & cast, 2.4k Bucky Barnes reassembles himself to a reasonable degree and makes romantic overtures to one Steve Rogers. It’s happened before and will happen again. ✦ I’d Know That Face Anywhere by Shay081793, steve/bucky, NSFW, divergent timeline, 2.7k The 107th never got captured. Instead, Bucky Barnes is in the audience when that clown "Captain America" performs to rally the troops, and holy shit, that clown is Steve Rogers. ✦ and we are finally home by springsoldier (ladydaredevil), sam & bucky + steve/bucky + implied sam/natasha + implied bucky/natasha, 7.3k The Winter Soldier shows up in Sam's kitchen, one morning. He deals with it. (Natasha helps. Steve would, if they let him.) ✦ Capture the Flag by Shiny_n_new, steve/bucky + sam, dark au, 9.4k wip Bucky has always been willing to do Captain America’s dirty work. This was no different. Sometimes, the day isn’t won by high ideals or bravery or compassion. Sometimes, it’s won by monsters. ✦ Memories are Made of This by eleveninches, steve/bucky & natasha & sam, 13.2k Nearly a year after turning himself into SHIELD and the Avengers, Bucky struggles to find himself in the 21st century. Unfortunately, no one told him about the aliens.

✦ but hey, you’re all right by beardsley, steve/bucky + other marvel characters, 5.5k Yes, this is the story where the Winter Soldier is a Russian mail-order bride. Everything goes about as well as you’d expect. ✦ I Left Myself in 1943 (Who the hell is Bucky?) by originalblue, steve/bucky + sam + natasha + other marvel characters, 21k You have a mission, but your mind is being split in two, and there's a man on the bridge, and you know him. You don't know why, but you know him. ✦ sam deserves better than these assholes by lazulisong, steve/bucky + sam + natasha + other marvel characters, 18k IM SORRY BUT SAM WILSON STARING IN BAFFLED WONDER AT STEVE AND BUCKY AND HOW WEIRD THEY ARE ABOUT EACH OTHER ✦ broken pieces (the rough edges remix) by legete, steve/bucky, 2.1k It’s wrong, he knows it’s wrong, but sometimes Bucky prefers the nightmares that actually happened. ✦ Talk Dirty to Me by PeetaPan, steve/bucky, NSFW, wall sex, 2.5k Steve spends months tracking Bucky down, and when he eventually find him, it’s in a nightclub in Europe. ✦ the body adrift by Febricant, steve/bucky + sam, mildy nsfw, 4.2k Steve has no drawings of Bucky from before. Those are all gone, destroyed in the war or by his own hand; it wouldn’t do for anyone to see how easily the details came from memory, how often Bucky was in his thoughts. ✦ Tony Stark and the Illegal Cross-Country Road Trip from Hell by ActionAddiction, steve/bucky + tony + sam + clint + natasha + fury, 21.8k wip A stir-crazy genius, a secretly sentimental assassin, two soldiers lost in time, and an undercover archer without an identity zigzag across the continental United States in Fury’s stolen van. Or: How Bucky Met Steve (Again)

✦ Didn’t know I was lonely till I saw your face by gunboots, steve/bucky + bucky/natasha + sam + bruce + tony + xavier, 2.9k There are words on paper, actors in movies, and a grand story that fills a whole corner of a museum defined by history. There are words, there are pictures, there are movies, but they’re limited, fragmented. They can’t do justice to the sniper that Captain America trusted, the man that grew into a boy in the streets of Brooklyn with his best friend at his side. The man that could be James Buchanan Barnes leaves a legacy that is barely defined. The man that Steve Rogers says he is. ✦ the inaccuracy of historical wartime dramas by Mici (noharlembeat), steve/bucky + sam + natasha, 3k (or: Steve has feelings, and shouldn’t ever watch television) ✦ The Shape I’m In by radialarch, steve/bucky, 2.6k [AU where Bucky never fell.] They win the war. Steve and Bucky come home and deal with their feelings. ✦ дорогой by smilebackwards, steve/bucky + other marvel characters, canon divergence, 1.8k “Are you goddamn kidding me?” Fury asks when Steve shows up to the rendezvous point in Fredericksberg with the Winter Soldier. ✦ have you ever thought just maybe by Desdemon, steve/bucky + tony/pepper + other marvel characters, humor, 4.4k “JARVIS,” Tony called thoughtfully. “Yes, sir?” “Those young people are in love,” he said. ✦ Use Your Damn Words by wilddragonflying, steve/bucky, NSFW, omegaverse, 4.2k There’s murmuring, indistinct voices, all around him; all he catches, at first, are the occasional words. “—mated.” “—no difference—“ “—make him forget—“ That’s when Bucky starts fighting. ✦ It’s an Adequate Life, Bucky Barnes by what_alchemy, steve/bucky, it’s a wonderful life fusion, 10.2k This is a world without Bucky Barnes.

✦ and it starts just where the light exists by caughtinanocean, steve/bucky, mildly nsfw, 3.4k In which Bucky can’t admit the things he needs, but Steve knows them anyway, and Steve and Bucky are definitely a couple, even if they don’t know it. ✦ tango till they’re sore by sciencemyfiction, steve/bucky, nsfw, 4k Four shorts about Steve and Bucky, and romance, and sex, and dominance, and grief, and forgiveness. ✦ Permission by derekstilinski, steve/bucky + other marvel characters, 2.5k After Bucky’s captured by SHIELD, they put him in a holding cell, and strip him of everything but his clothes. He’s dirty, damaged, and Steve can’t just watch him like that, protocol or not. ✦ Milkshakes & Penguin Suits by TheLocket, steve/bucky, fluff, 2.9k At the latest Stark party, Steve and Bucky share a milkshake — and spend the evening together. ✦ Practical Mathematics by Grey_Bard, steve/bucky + steve/peggy + steve/peggy/bucky + tony, 1.7k After a hard shift saving the world, Stark - in his infinite wisdom - has decided to bond with Steve by talking about his favorite subject. Well, third favorite, after building things and smart-mouthing people. Steve is pretty sure none of his experiences really count. Tony is starting to wonder what Steve’s definition of “is” is. ✦ how happy must be angels thus employed by lanyon , steve/bucky + clint/coulson, mildly nsfw, humor, 2k It begins entirely accidentally. Clint walks in on Bucky and Steve in a compromising position and then Bucky escalates by tapping a private line between Clint and Phil. Also known as The One With The Cock-Blocking Competition (and it’s all fun and games until Phil and Steve find out.) ✦ Fate by grumpyowls, steve/bucky + peggy, 2.1k Bucky finds a drawing and it turns out to mean something more than he thought.

✦ One More Time by DevBasaa, steve/bucky, pre-serum, ~1k Steve’s clueless and Bucky’s not yet ready to acknowledge these feelings. But that doesn’t stop him from having them. Set before Bucky ships out, but after Steve receives his A1. ✦ Bucky and Bear by fromgoodbones, steve/bucky, fluffy, ~1k Steve gets Bucky a cat. ✦ Size Isn’t A Problem by bondboy68, steve/bucky, NSFW, 1.8k It’s the first time Bucky has seen Steve naked in some seventy-odd years, and things have definitely changed.

STEVE/BUCKY - PRE-THE WINTER SOLDIER SPECULATION:

✦ devil’s gonna follow me (wherever I go) by Lyaka, steve/bucky & natasha & cast, the winter soldier speculation, 63k The man who used to be Bucky Barnes lined up his shot. His finger twitched, only once, very precisely. Help me, the bullet sang. Ninety-eight floors below him, the bullet glanced off a vibranium shield with a musical ping. And Steve Rogers looked up. ✦ And it felt like a kiss by orphan_account, steve /bucky & natasha & sam, the winter soldier spoilers, ~1k We can’t stop feeling Winter Soldier feelings. And neither can Bucky or Steve. ✦ testament by paxlux, steve/bucky + other marvel characters, the winter soldier speculation fic, 10.6k His memory runs backwards in crooked bright flashes, hard as the noise flare of an assault rifle. ✦ persistence of memory by hollimichele, steve/bucky/natasha, NSFW, the winter soldier speculation, 11.5k It’s a nondescript sort of a Wednesday morning when the Winter Soldier walks into SHIELD headquarters, bold as brass, and announces his intention to surrender. ✦ To Be Modified As Necessary by ignipes, steve/bucky & bucky/natasha & clint/natasha & thor/jane & avengers, the winter soldier speculation, 5.9k They only need ten rules to ensure (relatively) peaceful cohabitation. ✦ lights at two dollars a strand by legete, steve/bucky + tony, the winter soldier speculation, 1.4k They don’t mean to decorate for Christmas. It just sorta…happens.

STEVE/BUCKY - POST-THE WINTER SOLDIER: ✦ Out of the Dead Land by orphan_account, steve/bucky + sam + natasha + nick fury + other marvel characters, nsfw in one scene at the end, 62.7k Someone is building machines that look and act like people. Meanwhile, the Winter Soldier tries to be Bucky Barnes. ✦ this is a back alley by saintsideways, steve/bucky & natasha & sam, the winter soldier spoilers, 14.2k Here is the only thing you know: the body remembers. ✦ your blue-eyed boys by Feather (lalaietha), steve/bucky & cast, 123.3k Steve has no plan. Not because he hadn't tried to make one. He'd tried to make lots of plans. Plan, adapt, plan again, tried to think of every contingency. [post-Winter Soldier recovery fic] ✦ The man on the bridge by boopboop, steve/bucky & tony/pepper & clint/natasha & cast, 107.5k Steve Rogers turning up at Tony's door with an amnesiac assassin - who may or may not have some of Tony's personally designed hardware attached where his arm should be - well that's just far too interesting to turn away, even if Tony is trying to avoid all things S.H.I.E.L.D these days. ✦ Soft Spot for the Hell Raisin’ Boy by ifeelbetter, sam & bucky + steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, (some) humor, 1.9k The Winter Soldier takes an interest in Sam Wilson. Bucky Barnes wants to tell him how to be Steve Rogers’s best friend. ✦ Reconstruction Site by EmilianaDarling, steve/bucky + sam, the winter soldier spoilers, 7.6k He is the Winter Soldier. He is James Buchanan Barnes. He’s not one and he’s not the other, and he’s not sure if that makes him anything worth saving. In which the Winter Soldier leads Steve Rogers and Sam Wilson on a wild goose chase through Eastern Europe so that he can learn more about the man who actually thinks he can be saved.

✦ hold me tight by hollimichele, bucky/steve + sam + natasha, nsfw, the winter soldier spoilers, 11.1k In the old days, before the war, Steve got cold at night. That was all it was, at first. ✦ A Bullet in the Barrel (of your best guy’s gun) by lc2l, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, canon divergence (sort of), violence, 6k You return to the concrete hole in the ground where the mission is not dead and not in the sewers and is looking at you. “Bucky,” says Rogers, Steve (deceased). ✦ Sleeperhold by Argyle, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 3.2k He’s hardwired to disappear. ✦ lost my fear of falling by ftmsteverogers, steve/bucky + natasha + sam, 1.8k “It’s been two weeks,” Natasha says, pressing a coffee cup into Steve’s hand. “How long are we going to do this?” Steve watches the steam curl into question marks above his cup. “I know he’s still in there,” he says, and that’s that. ✦ but the fires are coming by stitchingatthecircuitboard, steve/bucky + bucky & natasha, the winter soldier spoilers, 4k He does not remember, except that is better than being made to forget, again, and again, and again. He does not go to Brooklyn. ✦ we did not make ourselves by M_Leigh, steve/bucky + sam + natasha + tony, the winter soldier spoilers, 25.1k It is like steel, the determination inside of you that tells you you will achieve this, that you will find him. Nothing will stop you. You are two sides of the same coin, you and he: he cannot escape you forever. Bucky runs. Steve follows. ✦ measured my life in cooking lessons by FoxGlade, steve/bucky + clint + avengers, fluff, the winter soldier spoilers, 4k He knocks on Clint’s door, sharp and loud, and half a minute later Clint is standing there in boxers and a baggy Army Rangers shirt. “Morning,” Steve says shortly, before Clint can say anything. “You up to teaching me how to make those French toasts? I think I need to talk.” Clint yawns and stretches. Something in his back makes a loud cracking sound and Steve winces. “Yeah, I’m up,” he mumbles, then squints. “This is going to be a long cooking lesson, isn’t it?” “I found Bucky sitting outside the tower on the street when I went out for a jog and he remembered me but I’m pretty sure that’s all he remembers.” Clint just waves a hand and heads for the kitchen, Steve shuffling in his wake.

✦ and we are finally home by lastembers, sam & bucky + steve/bucky + sam/natasha, 7.3k The Winter Soldier shows up in Sam’s kitchen, one morning. He deals with it. (Natasha helps. Steve would, if they let him.) ✦ Circling Back by chaya, steve/bucky + sam + natasha + tony, the winter soldier spoilers, 59.6k Steve looks for Bucky, Bucky finds Steve, Steve tries desperately to put Bucky back together. Bucky tries desperately to let him. ✦ your favorite ghost by augustbird, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 21k It’s harder than Steve ever expected to bring Bucky home. ✦ Green-Eyed Monster by storiesfortravellers, steve/bucky + steve & tony + steve & sam + bucky & natasha, humor, 1.9k The Winter Soldier has joined the team and is slowly recovering, but he goes into a jealous rage whenever he sees that Steve is close friends with Tony, Sam, or Natasha. Past Steve/Bucky. ✦ Castor and Pollux by StringTheori, howard stark & steve + steve/bucky, mild the winter soldier spoilers, 2.9k A fic where Howard is emotionally constipated, a terrible human being, catches someone doing something, and brushes off friendships because he can. ✦ Find My Way by Brenda, steve/bucky + oc pov, the winter soldier spoilers, 4.6k Well, someone had to write the post-Winter Soldier fic where Bucky gets a decent meal and some homemade apple pie, right?

✦ Parallel Constructions by freshbakedlady, steve/bucky + sam + natasha, the winter soldier spoilers, 13.6k In the absence of orders, the man wearing the face of Bucky Barnes must figure out who he will be. The answer, mostly, is “somebody Steve Rogers can love.” Nothing so easy should ever take this much work. ✦ five people bucky barnes never was. by rhllors, steve/bucky + bucky/natasha, the winter soldier spoilers, 1.9k Five lives that never came to pass. ✦ no heart to recall by KiaraSayre, steve/bucky & sam & natasha & tony, the winter soldier spoilers, 15.3k He’s been in Steve Rogers’s company for less than twenty-four hours and he’s already losing sight of his mission. ✦ Bring Us Back a Souvenir by newredshoes, steve/bucky & sam & bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 1.5k Even with all his hair hacked off, he doesn’t look like a Bucky, Sam thinks. Maybe as some sort of stupid joke, like naming your most vicious dog Sweetpea. Steve’s told him the stories, and he’s seen the old newsreels; he knows what this Barnes guy used to be like. But it’s not like knowing what to look for is going to magically make some spark rise to the top. This isn’t an excavation. ✦ i will be your ground by misprinting, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 4.7k A character study. The subject: Bucky’s hair. (Also, a Bucky comes in from the cold fic.) ✦ Debts by vestigialwords, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, ~1k Steve’s life is a collection of debts, and the balance does not work out in his favor. ✦ Five times Steve kissed Bucky by paragon, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 16.5k (+ once, finally, it was the other way around) ✦ Run Until the Road Runs Out by ignipes, steve/bucky + sam & bucky + natasha, the winter soldier spoilers, 5.2k Sam’s along for this ride because he’s not about to let Steve Rogers go it alone, but Steve’s not the only one who needs a friend.

✦ And you that shall cross from shore to shore years hence, are more to me by ifeelbetter, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 4.4k The Captain woke quickly and tested the chain before he saw the Soldier. All the tension in his body evaporated once he met the Soldier’s eyes and he slumped downward, back up against the wall. “Oh, thank god,” he said. He repeated it twice, quiet. Like a secret. ✦ Your Mind Rings by Amberly, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 1.2k You aren’t Bucky. You’re not the Winter Soldier anymore, either, but you’re not Bucky ✦ tabula rasa by dance_at_bougival, steve/bucky + natasha + sam, the winter soldier spoilers, 10.3k Bucky Barnes screamed himself hoarse on that table and screamed falling off that train. He screamed when they programmed him and screamed and screamed until he isn’t Bucky Barnes anymore, not really. He is still screaming, a trapped rat running around a labyrinthine machine, clawing at the doors and running into dead ends. He has been screaming for seventy years. ✦ The Age’s Most Uncertain Hour by dewinter, steve/bucky + peggy, the winter soldier spoilers, 1.8k Five times the Winter Soldier remembered (and then forgot). ✦ The Steven G. Rogers Guide to What You Missed the Last Few Years by what_alchemy, steve/bucky, humor, 5.1k Steve’s got the hang of this 21st century thing. ✦ All the First Times by Vera (Vera_DragonMuse), steve/bucky + other marvel characters, the winter soldier spoilers, 9.6k Bucky starts over and finds new ways to survive. ✦ Me Against Your Memory (It’s a Two-Step Recovery Process) by thisiswhatthewatergaveme, steve/bucky + steve & natasha + steve & sam + natasha & sam, the winter soldier spoilers, 56.5k wip The Soldier needs answers. It’s the only mission he has left. And the mission is all he has.

✦ Make It Up as We Go Along by hannahrhen, steve/bucky + natasha + sam, mildly nsfw, the winter soldier spoilers, 1.6k Steve’s a terrible liar when he opens his mouth. ✦ What’s in a name by Ark, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 3.4k Steve doesn’t resist. He is dipped back: a dance. “Bucky,” says Steve. The severely serene surface does not stir. “You will answer the questions I ask.” The Soldier’s voice is Bucky’s but the accent is all wrong. His face is Bucky’s, perfect, and all wrong. ✦ Drawn From Life by littlerhymes, steve/bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 2.5k “I remember,” Bucky says, but that’s not entirely true. Set after The Winter Soldier.

STEVE/BUCKY - POST-INFINITY WAR: ✦ Coming Back by Emotionallyunstabl, entire cast (some steve/bucky), infinity war spoilers, 1.9k Fixing Avengers: Infinity War. ✦ How ya been, Buck? by dvorahbee, steve/bucky, NSFW, infinity war spoilers, 2.3k A fix-it for Bucky and Steve’s reunion because I wasn’t too happy with that half-assed reunion we had. ✦ hold some dirt with those hands by magdaliny, steve/bucky & cast, infinity war spoilers, 3k It had sent him to his knees. ✦ To Never Have Loved At All by hitlikehammers, steve/bucky & cast, infinity war spoilers, 2.8k Steve will say they had work to do, and a universe to put to rights. They had people to find and hearts to unbreak. They had a mission. There was no time for any of them to mourn. Steve, as it turns out, says a lot of things that are mostly bullshit.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: STEVE&BUCKY GEN FIC RECS: ✦ This, You Protect by owlet, steve & bucky & everyone else, humor, 64.3k The mission resets abruptly, from objective: kill to objective: protect ✦ By Choice or By Habit by Sholio, steve & bucky & natasha & clint & tony, 6.4k He is useful. He holds onto that. He is useful and a useful tool will not be thrown away. (For illumynare’s request: How about something with Bucky realizing the Avengers actually think of him as a person? And off I went to the utterly shameless h/c place.) ✦ 5 (+1) Times Bucky Was Already a Supersoldier by chaya, steve & bucky, 1k Erskine made it plain for Steve - the serum makes you stronger, faster, harder to kill, and it amplifies your existing qualities. Barnes, though, didn’t get any such heads up. ✦ Thaw by danveresque, steve & bucky & sam & natasha, 7.5k The Winter Soldier tries to find Bucky Barnes. ✦ Brothers In Arms by copperbadge, steve & bucky & sam & sam & tony & pepper & clint + background tony/pepper, 11.4k Bucky Barnes gets a tune-up, a new pet, and a home. ✦ You Know How I Feel, aka, The Adventures of Bucky and Muffy the Dinosaur by ifeelbetter, bucky & avengers, fluff, 4.5k Bucky saved a tiny dinosaur and took her home to Avengers Tower and on the way remembered how to laugh and sleep in soft beds. ✦ Strawberries in Wintertime by Sholio, steve & bucky & sam & natasha & sharon, 3.2k Or, how Sam’s apartment turns into a hangout for superheroes, spies, and rogue assassins. ✦ This Lonely Hour Before Daybreak by cheesethesecond, steve & bucky + sam + natasha, 2.9k Steve knew there would be good days and bad days. That’s how this sort of thing worked. Except sometimes, the bad days go like this.

✦ Almond, Clavicle, Orchid by kvikindi, steve & bucky & sam & natasha, 4.5k You say, “I don’t know what I am.” “It’s okay not to know,” Steve tells you. His face is very careful. But you know. You know that it’s not okay. ✦ you can’t fly on dinosaurs, bucky by scorpionbythesea, steve & bucky & clint, humor, 1.2k Based off the tumblr post by embracingthemadness and the tag that followed: steve and bucky making up random stories from their past and convincing the other avengers that it actually happened (◡‿◡✿) #there’s no way you guys fought nazi dinosaurs ✦ Fly on the Wings of Love by Omnicat, steve & bucky & sam & natasha & tony & clint + some background pairings, domesticity, 13.2k The Wings: Bucky just wants to show his appreciation for everything Sam has done for Steve. Of course, Tony Stark’s middle name is ‘needlessly difficult’. The Love: Bucky tries to set Natasha up with Sam. He’s a bit late for that party, but he managed to find Steve’s shield and replace Sam’s wings: he’ll come up with something for her. ✦ Swap by sparkles_stars, steve & bucky + avengers, body swap, 1.2k Steve and Bucky switch bodies. Nothing of substance happens from that moment on. ✦ Escape by Sholio, steve & bucky, 2.4k Missing scene for Captain America: The First Avenger – freeing the prisoners was just the start of getting away. ✦ think of it as personality dialysis by KiaraSayre, bucky & darcy, humor, 1.4k “I strangled someone with a shoelace once,” Barnes says. “Does that count as expressing myself through clothes?” “Uh, no.”

✦ Name, Rank, and Serial Number by forthegreatergood, steve & bucky + other marvel characters, 1.5k A Nazi peeling off his skin and declaring himself beyond human doesn’t even get a rise out of him anymore, but Bucky doesn’t think he could stand it if Steve ripped off his face, too. ✦ The Dawn of That Last Great Day by ignipes, steve & bucky + avengers + minor pairing references, the winter soldier speculation fic, 13.8k The Winter Soldier has a mission: kill Captain America. ✦ All The Leaves Are Brown (And the sky is gray) by AvocadoLove, bucky & tony + some tony/pepper + very mildly implied steve/bucky, 17.4k The Winter Soldier's mission is nearly complete. Howard and Maria Stark are dead, leaving him to dispatch their four-year-old child. One quick twist of the neck is all it will take, but the Soldier finds he cannot do it. So instead of killing Tony Stark, the Winter Soldier takes him away to raise as his own.

CAPTAIN AMERICA: STEVE&BUCKY&CAST - POST-THE WINTER SOLDIER: ✦ so this is how it is by sciencemyfiction, steve & bucky & sam, the winter soldier spoilers, ptsd, 29.1k Following the events of the Winter Soldier film, Steve and Sam finally find Bucky, and work to get back to a good place. ✦ On Your Left by TravelingRoses, steve & bucky & natasha & sam & tony thor & fury peggy, the winter soldier spoilers, 12.9k Five times someone told Steve to give up looking for Bucky and two times someone didn’t. Alternately, five times someone smacked Steve on the head and said “Don’t do the thing” and he continued doing the thing and two times he listened so he could keep doing the thing. ✦ and i have fought (in flesh and blood) by ChristinasInferno, steve & bucky, the winter soldier spoilers, 1.1k “He is Bucky Barnes and his best friend is Steve Rogers, and Steve Rogers is Captain America.” Bucky, post-Winter Soldier. ✦ The Care and Feeding of Traumatized Ex-Assassins by Sholio, steve & bucky + natasha + sam, the winter soldier spoilers, 6.6k Steve starts to notice someone’s been in his apartment while he’s not there. Set after Winter Soldier; spoilers. ✦ Glass of Milk by Lauralot, bucky & avengers, the winter soldier spoilers, 6.6k In which in the Winter Soldier is in the care of the Avengers. He has yet to regain his memories, but he has developed a fondness for dairy products.

#lumi.txt #marvel #captain america #steve rogers #bucky barnes #stucky #fic recs #marvel fic recs #captain america fic recs #stucky fic recs

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autisticlancemcclain · 4 months

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fic rec friday 58

hello and welcome to fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.

The Value of a Moment by @a-fools-errand

When Lance’s previously obsolete skills in language suddenly become very useful, he finds himself wondering why aliens can’t account for the fact that humans, particularly him, need sleep and would prefer linear timelines. (Or: an Arrival AU because I love that movie)

yall OBSESSED does not begin to cover it. i have never read a fic where lance was so goddamn cool. and in like. the insanest of ways?? like of course lance is a polyglot but THIS....this is a whole new level. i havent even finished it fully yet but like god this thing is so fucking cool. if ur looking for a longfic stop looking

2. Rest Stop by @flaming-potato-arsonarson

Lance wasn't like the rest of the world. And he had never had a loving mother tell him it made him stronger for it. So he told himself, gathering up his courage and grit to face a world of winged humanity, when he, in fact, has no wings and turns into a mermaid instead. A world that wants him to die. So he'd keep this secret like a knife in his boot, a sharp weapon until he died on his own terms. Not because of who he was. Except, Team Voltron isn't so sure why Lance is all rough edges and sharp points about showing off his wings. Or acting like a member of the Flock in general. It's clear he cares for them, but he's never shown an intimate part of him. Until he has to.

oh god this has gotta be one of my CLASSIC fics. read it a few dozen times. i read it right when it came out, six ish years ago (goddamn), i can remember curling up in my old bunk bad and eating this up as the hours ticked by. i was HOOKED. my jaw was dropped my eyes were glued. could not get enough. if youre looking for mermaid lance with a twist....brother this is it

3. Looking for Rain by @thewriter2

Like most things, it starts with the little things: his smile, his confidence, his talent. Eventually, all these little things add up to one big thing that threatens to crash over them like a heavy rain. But, maybe that wouldn't be a bad thing. Maybe something beautiful would come from it. A 5+1 (really a 10+1) of Lance and Keith falling in love.

oh god guys..... @thewriter2 knows how to fucking haunt you. if a 10+1 (!!) isnt enough for you, i want you to know this line has been echoing in my head since i first read: "He looks at you like you’re a storm and he’s a desert desperate to drown." UM??? EXCUSE ME???? SIMILE OF ALL TIME ACTUALLY???? keith being so so visibly obviously in love with lance is my actual roman empire shit never leaves my mind

4. Astronauts by @thewriter2

When they entered the Blue Lion, Keith was Lance’s rival--the person Lance was working so hard to surpass. But slowly, Lance found himself thinking of Keith less as a rival and more as something close to a friend. So of course, Lance’s traitor of a heart decided that it would be Lance’s kind of friend that it would fall in love with.

tags to sell you: "keith is a dork but lance loves him anyway" (dorky keith my beloved), "hunk is an a+ friend" (yes he is), "lance is a lovesick fool" (yeah), and "allura is older sister goals" yes yes YES you get it. and like....while keith pov is my favourite to write by far, lances pov as he realises he is in love....that will always hold such a special special place in my heart

5. his own worth by frogsterz

In the middle of the conversation, Lance stops talking and no one notices. It’s not like he had been leading the conversation, for he hadn’t been, but somehow the fact that his lack of input or opinion isn’t noticed tightens the grip loneliness has on his heart. He looks down at his food, his face burning, his throat tightening up.

now usually anything but team as family isnt my deal. im not big on classic langst. but keith as a knight in shining armour.....what can i say i am weak willed. deeply. also " It’s what made it worse. I miss home and I miss being held and the rain, and I loved you. I thought you hated me." got me so bad got me WEAK like i have never recovered from that line and i doubt i ever will

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!

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damianbugs · 1 year

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If you r still doing the fic recs, what are some good Bruce and Jason ones? I'm going insane

HELLO. oh my gosh. you know, since exam month has officially begun, i should be studying, but like, why would i do that when i could be doing this instead? this is like. so much more productive for my happiness.

it's no secret i am not normal absolutely totally insane about bruce and jason and OF COURSE i will rec you fics of them. i have 150+ bookmarks of fics just centred around them so i really tried to narrow it down to a few of my favourites. if you ever need anymore please ask again!

what a truly disastrous tragedy they are. the blueprint i fear. no fictional father and son has impacted me more. jason and bruce fic writers lace their works in crack because once you read one, you are stuck forever. there is no escape. trust me. anyways!

BRUCE AND JASON FIC RECS

don't take your guns to town by kreestar

batman comes home from a night patrolling to find a 10 year old jason todd waiting for him in his kitchen. across gotham, at the same time, red hood is stopped by a 25 year old bruce wayne.

MY NOTES: no one is surprised at all that the first fic on this list is time travel. the characterisation in this was insanely good especially between young bruce and jason i loved their parts. so bittersweet and the ending was lovely!

I Will Always Be There For You by squashflower

There's a closet in the manor that locks you inside. It has no lighting or heating or air conditioning of any kind, and Jason, safe to say, wishes he could burn it to the ground. Or shoot it. One of the two.

MY NOTES: there is just something so good about stories where it switches from robin jason to an experience mirrored by red hood jason and this is the perfect example. so so good.

all the small weights by sparkycap

When Batman gets hit with fear toxin, he worries about his Robins. His Robins think it's their job to deal with it. Jason wasn't aware anyone still included him in that group, but according to Tim, he's the only one available.

MY NOTES: fear toxin the trope that keeps on giving. best thing about this though is that the actual fear toxin is not the main part of the story, and i think it was handled so beautifully and maturely in a way i haven't seen before. i cried (twice).

-> just an aside, but i think you should read the other bruce and jason work by this specific writer. they're all insanely good.

Mermaid Tears by minnow_doodle_doo

And if real mermaid tears were what Jason wanted the world to have, Bruce would make Aquaman cry glass.

MY NOTES: teehee sorry for recommending ur own fic in ur ask minnow but this fic is just so sweet and special i need everyone to read it. a wonderful look into that all encompassing love bruce had for jason when things were much simpler for them.

Aftermath by ivy_and_ivory

Now: Batman is in Paris, pulled there by a case that extends beyond Gotham’s borders, when circumstances lead him to a badly injured Red Hood – who might hold the key to Batman’s investigation.

Then: The Red Hood storms into Gotham, begins to stake his claim on the criminal underground, then abruptly disappears – but only after he breaks into Arkham Asylum and leaves the Joker dead in his own cell.

Or: A study of why Bruce couldn’t kill the Joker, what would happen if someone else could – and how you move on from the aftermath.

MY NOTES: you know when you find a fic and you're just like. oh my god. this is it. this is exactly what i wanted. this is all that matters. yeah. that's this fic to me. im sort of obsessed with the idea of batman bonding with red hood without making the direct connection that it's jason.

A Straight Blade by Sparkypants

"What happened to your face?" Bruce asks, reaching his hand for Jason's jaw. "You're bleeding." Jason bristles, cheeks turning pink. "I cut myself shaving." He says, and wipes at the cut with the cuff of his hoody. Damian makes a clicking noise with his tongue, "I'm amazed you haven't taken your own head off." He snarks. Jason shoves his chair away from the table, temper flaring. "Well it's not like anyone ever taught me, is it." He hisses. He's five years late, but Bruce finally teaches Jason how to shave.

MY NOTES: i am so okay so normal about this fic. such a sweet little happy story but i was literally looking down at my screen squinting through my blurry vision because i was tearing up. the unknowing domestic simplicities of being father and son (hysterical sobbing)

Stargazer by LemonadeGarden

Jason Todd is seriously injured during patrol one night, and is forced to stay at the manor to recuperate until his injuries are healed. To pass the time, he makes a list of things he never got to do before he died. Except there's one small problem: most of them involve Bruce, and Jason doesn't really think Bruce cares all that much about him anymore. This is a story about how wrong he is, but I made it sad anyway.

MY NOTES: okay so i think the best way to end this post is with the first ever bruce and jason centric work i ever read that changed the chemicals in my brain forever. THIS is the fic that made me really latch onto their relationship and want to see that reconciliation and recovery. THE roadtrip fic ever.

#bruce wayne #jason todd #oh how they r so important #batfamily fic recs #saki batfam fic recs #batman #red hood #robin ii

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mediumgayitalian · 2 months

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fic rec friday 6

hi!! welcome to fic rec friday. every week, i pick five fics i have bookmarked and rec them with a little review. check them out!

Will and Nico Sitting in a Tree by percyspandapillowpet

Nico rolls his eyes. “Can’t believe I used to have a crush on that guy,” he mumbles, and then immediately covers his mouth. Oh gods. “What—what?” Will asks. “You what?” Nico turns away, burying his face in his hands. “I—I said that out loud, didn’t I?”

this one made me giggle oblivious nico always does. "Like absolutely clueless sons of Hades" yes you tell him will!! will is such a brat w the biggest eyeroll problem in the world i adore him. i know he has literally strained his ocular muscles before

2. (Im)perfect by percysandapillowpet

He was thankful his suit was black, because he was starting to sweat through it. His stomach wasn’t holding up well, either. He hadn’t eaten anything in hours, but he felt like he was going to throw up any second. He stood in the bathroom still, now holding a wet cloth to his forehead. His hand was shaking, causing the water to drip down his sleeve. Why was he so nervous?

i am weak for proposal fics and have been my whole life. 'marriage is an instituation' blah blah blah. its FUN. i LIKE READING IT. and this was CUTE AS HELL. the namebadge especially was the cutest ever touch truly

3. As Long as I'm Getting Paid by percyspandapillowpet

Nico raised his eyebrows, using his shoulder to hold the door open. “Hi. What do you want.” Will smiled, but he shifted his feet. “Can’t a friend just stop by and say hi?” “No,” Nico replied. He then moved to close the door and retreat back into his cabin, but Will lunged forward and caught it. “Wait!”

walking up the scary badass to kill the spider will never not be funny. like yes of course befriending the most dramatic kids in camp will have dire consequences for nico and those consequences will involve waking up at odd hours in the night to do the Dumbest thing possible ever

4. Two Boys, Being Straight, Doing Straight Things by percyspandapillowpet

“Remember, dessert makes her sleepy. She’ll be out by seven-thirty, and we’ll have the rest of the evening to ourselves.” “Fair point,” Ms. Solace says, handing Will and Nico each a pie wrapped in tinfoil. “We can probably hold out til then.” Will glances at the clock above the stove. “One more hour.” He glances at Nico with a grin. “And then we can be gay again.”

i love this fckn series i have to have read it like fourteen times. i love seeing them gay and older and disastrous. and this whole concept of having to pretend to be straight for wills dumbass homophobic grandma will never not be funny

5. Even If It's Forever by @wintersky101

Nico doesn’t like to be touched. Will respects that, of course, even though he’s got a lot of hugs he wants to give him. Sometimes, though, Nico doesn’t mind, and those are some of the moments Will likes best. Or, five times Will didn’t touch his boyfriend, and one time he did.

this was such a soft and wonderful character study. the soft slow build and determined communication...yeah this fic was written with such care and you can tell

thank you for joining me this friday!! happy reading!!

#sorry that im so so late omg #i have no excuse except i was entrenched in character charts again #pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #hoo #heroes of olympus #side note im watching house & like....how do people who work closely together every day not fall deeply in love w each other #pjo hoo toa #will solace #nico di angelo #nico di angelo & will solace #nico di angelo/will solace #solangelo #secret relationship #fic rec #fic rec friday #longpost

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rob1ndad · 1 month

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WHOEVER DID AN ASK FOR A LIST OF ANGSTY IRONDAD SHORT FIC RECS, I ACCIDENTALLY DELETED MY POST AND IM SO SORRY BUT HERES UR REC LIST!!!

IRONDAD FIC REC LIST (oneshots/short fics):

disclaimer: always read the tags for TWs some have strong subject matter ⚠️

some of these are longer than others (anywhere from 1k-30k) but anything less than 100k is short to me lolll

Look back in anger

red punch || TW: non con

Between how it is and how it should be

make me strong || TW: non con

You look like yourself (but you're somebody else)

going down

Sometimes We're Holding Angels || TW: mentioned childhood noncon

Where Were You (Just A Little Late) || TW: Child abuse. mays abusive bf trope

One in a Million

Tears of Summer || TW: non con (this is a harder read)

Chemical Delirium

Leisure Sickness

Morgan is coming

Picture Frames

A gift for my m̶e̶n̶t̶o̶r̶ father

Just Like Ben

A Spoon Full of Sugar

Foolish, Fragile Spine

Ice, Ice Baby

He’s Just a Kid

That's why they call me mr. fahrenheit

Who Saves The Hero || TW: child abuse. mays abusive bf trope.

The Fucking Ferry Fustercluck Fiasco

exhaustion

Blogs that have good fic rec lists:

@irondadfics

@whumphoarder

@spacecowboysfrommars (one of my fav authors) my fav by them is here: click this

#irondad and spiderson #peter parker #tony stark #irondad ao3 #marvel #fic rec list #marvel fanfiction #irondad fics

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hiemaldesirae · 28 days

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i have less than 24 hours left before i have to go through one of the most stressful days of my life so. heres a list of my fav radiostatic fic recs in no particular order

clarification: by radiostatic i mean fics where vox is 100% not the dom in the relationship. most of these dont contain explicit sex though, and im not recommending any straight porn fics here because you can easily find those with a click and search through the bottom vox tag lmao

most of these fics are unfinished, so be warned that i will not take accountability if you get attached to these without them being finished properly. in fact ill just laugh at you because then we'll be suffering together

now, that aside- starting off strong with some of the more popular fics:

RHTVS / Radio Healed the Video Star by Aspiring_Forest_Witch

notes: LONG fucking fic. like this guys almost 700k words long fic. one of the best things ive ever read in my life though and it has a plotline thats frankly more engaging than the actual showing of hazbin on amazon. so. you know. if you have the time to read it Please do you wont regret it

Unraveling Emotions by Xaelei

notes: one of my favourite fics ever on god. started my brainrot for dad!husk, portrays one of the most scrumptious radiostatic dynamics and is generally so very well written that i might end up trying to recreate one of the scenes in comic form. genuinely in love with this fic and im so glad i can say i was the first comment on this fic because my God its such a treat to see new chapters drop for this. unfortunately i havent had the time to write out a detailed comment as of now but if someone wants to let the author know that im still in love with their fic and will continue supporting it until i drop dead go ahead for me

Safe with Me by rillyrillo

notes: the prequel and main fic of this series is human radiostatic, though the sequel is set in hell. it comes with gorgeous gorgeous art and frankly one of the most exhilirating endings ive ever had the pleasure of witnessing play out. i recommend you guys check out their other fics too, the art continues in them + their radiostatic is written wonderfully across all universes!

A Month of Rut by Vylad

notes: this fic is very self indulgent to me. i love the way radiostatic is written in this one because theyre very soft and sweet, but others may not prefer it if theyre looking for freak4freak radiostatic. if you just want something to indulge in and relax with at the end of a heavy day though this is my #1 rec. i read this sometimes when i find myself crying at night lmao

Down, Up, and Back Down by CowboyEnthusiast

notes: made me sob like a baby. 10/10 no notes whatsoever read it for yourself because you WILL not regret it. i genuinely am always at a loss for words whenever i reread this because it is among the most gutwrenching but beautiful and poetic works that ive ever read and i think it deserves some recognition

Mind the Gap by ZLynn

notes: again, to reiterate, i do very much dislike the abusive!staticmoth portrayal i see in a lot of fics. but in this one... it's written so perfectly, i can definitely see it actually happening. i enjoy the way that val does still seem to care about vox, albeit in his own twisted way that eventually breaks and fractures their love and trust, and its just. Ugh. So fucking good

+ with the less popular but still wonderful depictions of radiostatic that i love to indulge in:

i'll give you a show (cause it helps fill the seats) by dead_and_dreaming

notes: absolutely shameless plug from me for my dear mk's work because i cant stop thinking about the way that she's portrayed al here. its actually insane how fucked up that stupid little deer is and i just. i really fucking love the way that their alastor is written, it's genuinely probably my Number One depiction of alastor ever. i demand more of this stupid little freak RIGHT NOW!!!!

Any of the fics by Rachello344 in the Hazbin Hotel Fandom Tag on their profile

notes: so remember when i told you guys i wouldnt be linking straight porn. looks away... okay in my defense though i read the smut for the characterization and their unique dynamics. its sooo interesting to see how their radiostatic is explored here and im honestly refreshed by the depiction of their relationship. im here for it !!!

The Read 'Em and Weep Series by TooManyPseudonyms

notes: so from what i was able to piece together (everything flies over my head when im reading, forgive me for my low media literacy) this is an au set before the hotel where (in the first work) al and vox are in a qpr relationship. in the second work this evolves into a romantic relationship, and the exploration of their dynamic through this is just... Yeah. please read it its 100% worth your time and so underrated it hurts my heart

Uneasy by Saezs

notes: this fic is one of the first radiostatic fics i read (the others being RHTVS and... i think i tried the 666 series, but it didnt appeal to me lol) and its actually just wonderful. i really love saezs's genderfluid vox and how supportive the other vees are of them <3 their portrayl of the characters puts a smile on my face whenever i reread their work

Heat Waves by HappyPRAWN

notes: i'll be fr dsmptsd hit me like a truck when i read the title but it is such an interesting debut! only at one chapter as of me making this post but the way the author wrote this is so engaging and it really makes me wonder what they have next in store for the fic

Do I have your attention now? by Chi_Chi25

notes: wow no way we have the same name... anyway ahem. ill be completely honest this ones a bit of a guilty pleasure for me. this fic is a bit fragmented and short, so for people who click off fics when they see imperfect grammar this one may not be for you. however if you can look past that, it has an engaging storyline and quite the juicy concept :)

Killer Ex by FanGirl48

notes: gorgeous, gorgeous little human! radiostatic oneshot. i love the relationship that vox and al have here... the reasons why they both stayed away from each other even though theyre still so very clearly down bad for each other... anyway. i think about this one a lot and i still go back to reread it sometimes lol

Negotiations by FanGirl48

notes: i didnt realize until i started making this list that this fic was also written by fangirl48.... go off queen keep feeding us (me). this one was a fic recommended to me initially by link nonny, and i can 100% vouch for how good it is. its got appletv interactions, radiostatic plus lucifer trying to navigate heaven, angels... basically everything needed for a very varied and well packed with flavour story

The diary of a Serial Killer by ShippersCave

notes: okay im running out of brain juice at this point but. yeah this fic is soooo self indulgent to me. this ones another human au, with al as a serial killer and vox as the journalist trying to conduct interviews with him. its got SUCH a good dynamic between al and vox, i encourage you guys to check it out and give it a chance even if youre not really into human aus.

My heart's been pierced by Cupid by ShippersCave

notes: pirate/siren au !!!!!!!!! RAAHH !!!!! i dont have to say anything else for this if thats not enough to get you to click then i dont know what is

System Shutdown by Swoolie

notes: i cant believe i nearly forgot about this one LMAO... vox goes onto a temporary hiatus and everyone goes crazy about it. im not really sure if this counts as radiostatic frankly because of the way its tagged but its so good i think you should give it a read anyway

Together in Radio Static by Anonymous

notes: QPR media husbands radiostatic au !!!! i love this one especially because it opens off with vox slapping alastor across the face for leaving him LMAOO (deserved)

What Has Been by Tianren

notes: another human au (YEAH YEAH I KNOW. JUST HEAR ME OUT OKAY i swear im cooking) look, as someone with religious trauma deeper than i can properly express and the worlds fifteenth worst parental issues, the depiction of vox in this fic just really hits home. i really adore the exploration of voxs past and how the themes of religious guilt and cults are woven in so far- and it blends very seamlessly with their human au, despite the characters eccentricities

you're too sweet for me by awestruck_atrophy and moonbeanies

notes: basically, vox and al make a deal where vox tries to help him out of the shackles or whatever that are bound to him because of his stupid dumbass lusting for power. its very intriguing so far and i love the setup and worldbuilding the authors have done, so you should check it out if you want a unique perspective on radiostatics relationship

candlelight by curtailed

notes: the best way i can think of to describe this one is like... fake marriage but instead of fake marriage its. fake roommates??? the author probably puts it better than me tbh. its super interesting so far, i cant wait to see where this one is headed especially with how unique its premise is!

Zero Day by Anonymous

notes: this one is like those time regression manhwas. you know, the ones where the protag goes back in time and proceeds to try and avoid everyone who made their life miserable- only to fail because for some reason now they're paying attention to them more than they would have had they stayed the same person. its certainly very promising, though! i do love indulging in time regression stories, especially when the mc is someone i love like vox. i really cant wait to see which direction this one is headed in :)

Never as Good as the First Time by IComeForFanficsNowin403

notes: okay. so, uh. um. so- this one is in spanish. HOWEVER its premise (serial killer alastor meets television star (?? i think. its not quite clear) at a party hosted by rosie, moves into his neighborhood to keep an eye on the pretty prey) is just so unique i honestly think its worth the experience to pull out google translate and try living the machine translated life. really. give it a chance. also its got beautiful art to go along with, so.. you know. thats just a bonus!

+ honorary staticmoth and one-sided/past radiostatic fic rec:

Freak-A-Zoid by Femalefonzie

notes: this fic deserves every single piece of praise its ever gotten because good lord. its SO good. i was not seeing the radiostatic twist come in, but it *is* mostly staticmoth. and also a/b/o but i mean. who *hasnt* indulged in a little bit of a/b/o before honestly

there are other fics that i personally like to indulge in, but i frankly wouldnt recommend to anyone else because they're either the kinds of fics that i myself can only bring myself to read after ive spent 8 hours at work crying into my pillow and need to look at something entertaining, or when im starved of content and cant be bothered to cook myself so i pull out the translator and start going at it. (technically i should know how to read french by now but. urgh. anywway..)

#ran rambles #radiostatic fic #radiostatic #fic rec #fanfic recommendation #hazbin hotel #honestly ive probably forgotten a few bangers but my brain is melted by now #if anyone wants to add their own recs feel free. these are just my personal likes #ive read stuff by arctic and addicted ofc but those ones are basically known by everyone afaik lmao. swm is known everywhere too #but thats a bit diff because it is part of an expanding series. so #anyway i didnt like some of the more popular fics like 666 or addicted but i know many people like those #and for good reason too because theyre wonderful! just not to my personal tastes and thats fine

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cursingtoji · 3 months

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🎙️ just saw your post asking about blog recs…step up to the stage bc i need some!!!!

BLOGS RECOMMENDATION <3

— mostly jjk, but also chainsaw man and aot

*taping the mic* okay here are my nominees with some fics recomendations as well

disclaimers!

lemme start saying so plot is everything to me, pwp can be hot but i'll hardly remember it afterwards, that being said here's some writers that can do both great plots and hot scenes.

also while digging i realize i wasn’t following some of those and if you noticed im sorry im dumb but i truly love your writing.

i tried to tag every active blog i could remember but it’s possible i forgot a few since i’ve been reading more jjk recently. if i forgot you im so sorry please don’t take offense.

many blogs i loved were deactivated, rest in piece great works they had.

everything i read i reblog under the tag #recs

@thekillingmoonmoon ofc moon is the first one i think when the topic "best writers" come up, i freaking love her and everything she does its not even fair to pick one thing so im picking 3, this super passionate toji work that i re-read at an alarming frequency (which btw i consider my own personal gift). yakuza choso and yuki aka the hottest duo ever. the cherry on top is her kishibe series (just realized i gotta catch up on)

@rinhaler - luxe is def on my top 3, she comes up with very organic scenes. even if it's a simple plot she can develop it so originally. I recently read her underground fighter!sukuna and i'm still thinking about it.

@laudthingcat has the best headcanons in the jjk fandom hands down, it’s the perfect dose of hot funny and cute, pick anything from her masterlist it’s guaranteed you’ll have a good time reading it. when you moan their name in your sleep in particular gives me butterflies

@meownotgood is obviously the best aki writer out there, you can see the love for aki in their words and how they write him so well and so into character. arrival in tokyo is truly a masterpiece, they also have a +100k words series i've been wanting to read for a while but i want to rewatch chainsaw man first hehe, i'm 100% sure is fire tho.

@kentoangel roma writes choso like she's in love with him and you can tell. shes always on my for you and even her snippets are *chefs kiss* special kudos to stepbrother!choso

@kentopedia i just realized i'm assigning a writer per character and nanami is definitely rylie's. the domestic lovely way she writes him makes me forget canon.

@tojisun another blog that is very often on my for you page. cannot talk about toji fics without bringing up sun, everything she writes about him has me furiously nodding. not to mention simon and konig, just talking about them makes me wanna run to her blog and binge read everything

@chocochipsushi 's bodyguard toji is unforgetable to me, i wish i lost my memory so i could read it all again for the first time. bodyguard toji is the definition of living rent free in my mind, whenever i have to deal with annoying coworkers i immediately think “bodyguard toji would not allow them to talk to me like that”

@suget one of the greatest geto writers for sure, they have so many geto works, i was going through their blog to find the one i read more recently and there was so many others i haven’t seen! another writer i could very easily spend a whole day binge reading. btw this cult leader one was recommended to me and i fell in love with it <3

@staryukis has the cutest gojo drabbles

@tonycries brooklin baby was recommended to me by moon and it had me by the neck! also they have many other works im hoping to read soon as well

@mommypieck isayama created reiner but they created subby reiner

@titan-fodder ‘s the tinniest notion The Best Reiner fic in all the existence of the universe (tw: stepcest kinda?)

@nanaslutt mma!toji made feel every emotion possible so intensely

#jjk x reader #yes i’m adding the tag cause i think everyone should visit those blogs kay #recs #— mailbox 💌

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minhosimthings · 8 months

Text

Someone Older, Just a Little Bit Colder.

Summary: Yoon Y/N and Lee Minho. Perfect enemies. But when some guns and roses get mixed up with both of them, I wonder what the fates have weaved for their story.

Pairings: Fem!reader × Minho, classic Enemies to Lovers. Includes rest of Skz and other groups

Warnings: lots of violence, blood, murder, guns, swearing, mention of food, mention of dead bodies. There is a lot of violence so please do not interact if you are sensitive to these things.

A/N - I finished this finally. This took a lot of time and it is probably my longest work till date. I took inspiration from an edit I saw on Instagram. So here you go! Please enjoy this and feel free to give me feedback. I don't like some parts of the fic that much tho. Cause I was very lazy when I wrote them.

Song rec:

1: I need someone older

"No, no, no" Mournful voices were surrounding your frame. "No this can't be happening. Please Y/N!" Tears, not yours, dripped onto your skin as something red mixed with it to create a pretty little cocktail. "Fuck princess wake up! Fuck no....."

"Y/N! Come down quick! You've gotta get to school!" Another day of school. How mechanical was your life. In your final year of high school, you'd have thought that your life would have sugar, spice and everything nice. But instead, you got stuck with a robotic schedule, which consisted of waking up, going to school, coming back, food time, homework, checking to see if any colleges had sent you mails and then going back to sleep. But you couldn't really complain, because you were in Jeju Island. Literally everyone here had the same robotic schedule. Well maybe except for the richest people here. Your family was what was known as the middle classes. You lived comfortably, but not too plushily and your mom and dad both had jobs. Your elder sister Jinhee and you basically raised each other and now, with Jinhee, already graduated and married (since she was seven years older than you), you were left all alone in your turquoise room, with white borders and black finishes. It wasn't the fact that you weren't happy or anything. But, as a child of the Cosmos and as a ruler of the skies and tides, you wanted to feel that feeling that people had when they would roll around in the grass, or buy flowers from a sweet old lady, or wear ridiculous nail polish with someone, keeping the stories of the stars to yourself, whenever someone asks 'what did you do last night?'. But wasn't that why fairytales existed? To tell you that getting all those things was nothing but a mere dream? A dream which you hoped would come true? Which you hoped that the universe would understand your heart's desire and grant it to you?

"Be safe alright? Got your pepper spray?" "Yes ma don't worry. Im always safe aren't I?" Your mother kissed your forehead gently before letting to walk off to school, pepper spray in hand, knife hidden up the sleeve of your blue school sweater. The road from your house to your school was one of the safest ones. It was a suburban area, with families like yours lining up the street. You had no problem walking by yourself, and casually greeting the wakening families, with their toddlers and teenagers. You felt safe here and in the rare times there was some danger, you knew you could kick their asses (flashback to that one time you thought your dad was a stranger and accidentally kicked him hard in the shin. He still doesn't forgive you for that)

"Miss Yoon. Are you walking alone your highness?" That voice. That voice was perhaps the bane of your existence (not the object of all your desires. Sue me for using Bridgerton right now). A smooth black car pulled up next to you as you were just a metre away from the school. The windows were rolled down to reveal a young boy, your age with fluffy plum brown hair, cat like eyes, a sharp nose and a smirk on his stupid face. Lee Minho. Also known as the worst person you knew. And no this wasn't an enemies to lovers scenario. It usually is but this? Yeah absolutely not. Lee Minho had been your childhood neighbour since he was six. He lived with his grandparents since he was six, with his parents being in one of the richest families of South Korea and working in Seoul. He also went to your school, which was weird considering he was basically a billionaire and still chose to go to the 'middle class' school along with his his seven friends, who coincidentally were also from the seven richest families of South Korea.

"Oh no Minho. I wasn't walking alone. I have an invisible friend that you can't see from behind those stupidly pretty eyes of yours." You threw him a glare as his smirked just increased in size. "You think my eyes are pretty?" "Oh for fucks sake. What do you want?" "Language, princess." Minho chuckled and unlocked the passenger seat door. "Get in." You let out a chuckle and said "With you? Oh no thank you. I would rather go to Hell and dance with the devil." "Oh come on princess." Minho's face only widened even more to form the face of the devil himself. "You know people who die to even touch my car. You're lucky I'm offering you to ride in it." You rolled your eyes at him. So fucking cocky for no reason. You decided that you couldn't take it anymore and just started walking with a small 'I'll see you at school Minho goodbye now.'. Minho seemed to have taken the sign as he locked his doors, rolled the windows down and sped away to school.

Finally some peace. You breathed in the September air as you watched the Magpies fly around with their mates. You always loved Magpies, courtesy to your dad always encouraging you to birdwatch whenever you were free, with the pink binoculars you had. And today, in the serene September air, it felt good, watching two birds in love fluttering around, probably having a conversation about who knows what. There was that odd feeling in your chest again, that feeling which you pretended wasn't loneliness. People never understood the difference between alone and lonely. Yes you can be alone and you can enjoy it to your fullest. Some of your friends loved to be alone, eating chocolate, reading a nice book, sitting by the rain, all of those aesthetic things those Pinterest people do. You always craved to be like that too, but you never could. And you still had to learn to accept the fact that being basic wasn't a bad thing.

"Babe your foundation isn't blended properly come here. Hasn't Mama Huh taught you anything?" Your best friend Yunjin greeted you at the stairs of your school, with her bright unicorn bag and her perfect makeup as usual. "Sorry sweetheart. I really can't focus today." Yunjin gave you a sympathetic look as she blended the foundation on your neck with her hands carefully. "Is it Lee again? I swear to God one of these days I'm gonna go and tell him that you like him and then he'll confess to you and then this can be an enemies to lovers novel where I'm the sassy, amazing best friend who saves the day." You laughed at Yunjin's rambling. "And I thought Chaer was more delusional than you." "Do I hear my name?" A pretty girl with long black hair and perhaps the greatest jawline in the world came up behind you. Lee Chaeryoung, cousin of Minho and your second best friend, also your prettiest friend (sue me she's my wif- I mean my bias) "Hey Chaer. By the way have you guys completed Mr Hong's assignment?" Yunjin groaned at your words as she pulled out a red copy from her bag and opened it to reveal her messy handwriting. "I stayed up to finish this shit. Why do we need to analyse what a curtain means in Shakespearean language? Like I don't know. It could mean the heroine wants to be at an orgy for all I know." Chaer hit Yunjin's arm as you laughed at went inside the school to go to your English class along with Yunjin. Chaeryoung stalked off in the other direction, to her biology class, as you entered the class, where Mr.Hong wasn't present yet. You always dreaded English period, not because you weren't good in the subject, but because of the seating arrangement. Yunjin would always sit at the back of the class while you were stuck in the front with Minho. You internally groaned as you walked up to your seat, where Minho and Chan were talking to each other. Chan was a good friend of yours since your mom was the head of the Jeju Island branch of his dad's buisness. Curly haired, eyes filled with stars and the most gentle behaviour ever, he came straight out of a goddamn book. You always wondered how he became friends with Minho, considering both of them were as different as chalk and cheese. But then again, they has been brought up together, by their grandparents while their parents would stay in Seoul to run buisness.

"Hey Chan. Did you get those physics notes done yesterday?" Chan greeted at you with than omnipresent smile on his face as he nodded fervently like a puppy. "Yeah I got them done! It was really hard though. I really hope Mrs.Choi is absent today. So she can't call me out on my 'mistakes'." You smiled fondly at Chan as he took his seat on your other side, while Minho toyed with a blue hairband. Your hairband. "Minho where did you get that?" He turned to look at you and gave you that smug smirk again. "Why princess? Is it yours?" You scowled as you reached forward and grabbed the hairband out of his hands and stuffed it into your bag. "Yes it is mine! I think you'd know that considering I have been looking for this ever since the playground incident from when we were seven! Oh but I think you wouldn't remember that would you? Considering you're an ajhussi." It was Minho's time to scowl now and he scrunched up his nose like an angry bunny and stuck his tongue out at you, all while mumbling "I'm only two months older you know.", As Mr.Hong entered the classrooms in his pinstriped shirt and began asking for the assignments.

The rest of the day went as normal. You went to all of your classes, had a gossip-filled lunch with Chaeryoung, Yunjin, Miyeon, Sunoo and Jake, accidentally spilt water over Sunghoon from Chemistry, and got top grades in biology as usual.

Gosh September was good. September was lovely. People don't really get why September was so comforting to you. And to be frank, you didn't get it either. But there was this aura that September had that you couldn't shake. It wasn't just all pumpkin spice lattes or orange scarfs. It was..... Something else. Something you couldn't describe. You know that feeling when you bite into an ice cream cone? It crumbles all over you, but you love that feeling, that crunch combined with the sweet ice cream inside. That's what September was.

The bell rang loudly as school got over and you went over to the the basketball court. Being captain of the girls team, you always needed to stay back after school in order to train your team. "Unnie come quick would ya!" Chaewon, the team's greatest shooter called out to you. "Im not that late today Chaewon. That's a record for me!" Chaewon rolled her eyes as she adjusted her shorts. "Y/N are we gonna discuss some tactics for next week's game then? Cause I drew a lot of shit last night and I don't want it to go to waste." Wonyoung, the team's co-captain was nudging some papers into your hands. You gave her a quick smile as you looked over all the loopy drawings she did. "Oh and girls! Please remember to get your registration documents tomorrow! I really don't want to submit them late to Coach Kim." All your teammates nodded at your words and went on to the court, where to your dismay, Minho and his team were also practicing. You were annoyed. You had booked the court for today and has specifically checked with both of your coaches and yet again, your mortal enemy was playing with his team on what was meant to be your court. "Yah Minho! Get off the fucking court. We have it booked for today!" You gave him the biggest glare that you could muster, while he simply strode up to you, ball in hand, and that stupid smile on his face. "Aww princess. You booked the court for today? Well sad because I booked it earlier. I have a signed consent form from Coach Kim too. So either you can get off the court or we can have a practice game together." You felt like blowing up the earth below his feet right now but you couldn't do anything when he showed you the piece of paper on which Coach Kim had signed specifying that the boy's team could play today. "Fine then. But a practice game? Together? Boys versus girls?" Minho simply nodded at your words as you looked back at your girl standing behind you who were currently looking like they wanted to go to war. Seeing their determination, you extended a hand forward to Minho and in a assertive tone, said, "You're on then Lee. I wanna watch your pretty little face when you lose really badly. So what's the prize then?" You regretted asking that question when you saw Minho's face turning into that evil little smirk again. His team was assembled behind him and now you were a bit scared, considering that your tallest player was the size of their shortest one. "How about........ loser has to take the winner to that nice ice cream place that just opened down the street? And it'll only be us two. You know, captain to captain." Hearing that both your team and Minho's team broke out in high pitched 'ooohs' (yes even the Bois) as if you were doing something scandalous. You had no choice but to accept so you extended you hand again as Minho gripped it with his veiny hands and shook it firmly.

Chan and Chaeryoung were sitting by the stands since neither of them played and you smiled gently at them talking and giggling so fondly. The game started with one of the assistant coaches, Jungwon, refereeing. You were more determined now than you were at last month's regional games. You had to beat Minho and he had to take you to that stupid ice cream place. "Scared princess?" Minho asked as you assembled on the half line. You didn't say anything but threw him a smirk, hoping that it would catch him off guard. "Alright, ready set. Rumble!" Jungwon blew the whistle and threw the ball up in the air as you reached forward and managed to slap it onto your side of the court, where Wonyoung caught it and swiftly passed it on to Chaewon, who was standing by the hoops. You heard Minho scolding Jeongin, who was defending Chaewon, for not blocking her properly as you high fived Wonyoung for the quick pass.The rest of the game pretty much went the same way as you kept using witty tactics while Minho kept using speed and strength, which you knew was his greatest weakness. From time to time, his shirt would fly up ever so slightly and you would get distracted for a split second by his abs (which you scolded yourself for).

"Guys can you stop now please? It's 7:30. I'm going home now and you guys should too before they shut the school gate." Jungwon finally ended the game as you looked over at the scoreboard. You had won! You hugged Chaewon tightly before striding up to a very sweaty Minho who, not even in the slightest, looked defeated. "So, Mr Lee. You owe me ice cream now." He gave you a small smile, which made your heart leap, and said "Of course your Highness. Do you wanna get changed and then we can go? Or would you like to come being all sweaty?" You scowled at him and stuck your tongue out as you made your way to the changing rooms as he shouted behind you, "Meet me at the gate!" You quickly took a shower and changed into the tshirt and yoga pants you usually brought with you to change into after a sweaty game.

"Yah are you going to take me in your dumb car?" You questioned Minho as he pulled up by the gate. Chan had taken Chaeryoung home today so you didn't have anyone to walk you home, which was a plus point (for Minho). "Yes princess. Since the ice cream place is not at a walkable distance, atleast for my feet, we are going in my dumb car. And you don't wana walk home this late Y/N. It's dangerous you know? So get the fuck in and let's go. I'm hungry." You begrudgingly got in the car, silently admiring the sleep leather seats as Minho started the engine and turned the car. "Oh and Chan hyung already informed your mom and dad. They're not gonna come home tonight cause they're busy or something so I'll drive you back if you want." You snapped your head from the flying butterfly outside the window to Minho's concentrated face as you shyly mumbled a 'thank you'.

The drive to the ice cream was long and silent. You simply stated out the window while Minho stared forward, trying not to look at the way the rays of the setting sun fell on your skin or how your hair fell in that particular way that just felt good. Do the boys usually confess first? He didn't know. No he hated you. This is absolutely not fucking happening right now. You were Yoon Y/N, captain if the girls basketball team, annoying neighbour, beautiful mortal enemy. No not beautiful. Get out of it Minho!

"Uh is this the place? Looks cute." Minho's car pulled up near a tiny cafe like building called 'Jureimi's parlor', lit up in bright pink signs. "Oh yeah. I'll just park and we can go." You got out of the car as Minho parked nearby and got out too. "Is that boba flavoured ice cream?" You pointed at a brown coloured ice cream in ghe booth. The lady at the counter smiled at you as she nodded and gave you little sample cup. You offered a bit to Minho, who shook his head and went to find a table. "Get what you want. I'll pay." You rolled your eyes at him. He had to pay anyway for losing the game so badly.

You tasted the ice cream, which tasted like heaven and decided that you wanted this. "Can I get this in a cone please? Two scoops." The lady nodded and told her co worker your order, who went to the back to make it. You noticed some pudding cups on the shelf behind the lady. "Are those puddings?" "Oh yes. They're a new addition really. It's a favourite among all the grandmas here." You pointed at the vanilla one and asked the lady to give you that one, while you handed her the money and she handed you your ice cream and the pudding cup. You strode over to Minho, who was sitting with his legs wide open at the little round table in the corner of the store. "Is that for me?" He pointed at the pudding. "No dumbass it's for the Magpies." He gave you a sarcastic smile and grabbed the pudding cup from your hands. "I only got it for you cause this boba ice cream is expensive. So stop smirking at me." He looked up at you with those cat like eyes and slightly pouted, but remained quiet as both of you savoured on the sweet, sticky food.

"Dude how slow do you eat?" You watched Minho as he has halfway through his pudding, while you had already finished your ice cream. "Just slow enough to annoy you baby." You frowned at his words. "Do not call me that ever again. It's makes me wanna vomit." You made a gagging motion as Minho just simply chuckled. "Fine then. While I finish this amazing pudding, how about we play truth or dare hm? Because our impatient princess can't wait for five seconds without doing anything." You thought for a while before finally saying yes. "Alrightly then." Minho smiled at you. "Y/N. Truth or dare?" You picked truth, which seemed like the only viable option, considering the fact that you were in a shop, and Minho said, "How's your brother?"

Your heart dropped as you heard that sentence. How did he know about that? The blue shade of the shop spun around you as you tried to focus on anything else other than what just came out of Minho's mouth. Silence. Yes silence would work. Just give him a glare and it'll be over. "Oh come on princess. We all know what happened to your brother. I just wanna hear it from you personally." Your blood turned cold as your mind kept feeding you memories of that night. That faithful night. That peace filled night. That night when the Magpies stopped singing and September ran cold once more.

"Fuck you Lee Minho." Saying that, you picked up your bag and got up, slamming the chair to the ground, behind you. The lady at the counter looked up to see you walking about the door, pushing it agressively. "No Y/N wait!" Minho knew he had fucked up now. He had never meant to hurt you like this. He had learnt from Yunjin that you were already over your brother's incident. This was just supposed to be normal mortal enemy banter. How do you still remember? He quickly pulled out some cash and slammed it on the counter to the very shocked lady as he ran out after you. You wouldn't have gotten far. After all, you had to pass the school to get to your house. Minho quickly got in his car and started the engine with a blast. You had also left your headband in the carseat. So, that was another excuse for him to chase after you. He wasn't going to lose you again. Not now. Not when he was so close.

The street was dark and cold, lit up faintly by the wavering streetlights. This wasn't September anymore. You could feel December taking all the love out of September. And as you walked upon the concrete, you could feel the Magpies talking about you. You could feel the crescent moon feeling nothing but pity for you. You could feel all the plants with their bugs, looking at you and saying, "Yoon Y/N. You fucked up again just like you always do." You shouldn't have let your anger take control. But then again, when we deal with anger so long, she never tells us that her actual name is grief. Your brother was supposed to be a closed chapter of your life, but like a faded page of an Agatha Christie novel, he lingered on in your brain. All your family had far moved on, but you loved your twin brother, older than you by 8 minutes, too much to let him go from the dusty cabinets of your brain. You tried to forget his screams on that day and that cold, hard cackling but you couldn't. You were right there. Right in front of all the destruction, when your heart broke into a million pieces. Yet how could you forget such a memory?

"Y/N!" Minho was rolling up with this car next to you as you reached your house. The magenta coloured door was locked, your parents were still out on work. "Minho just fucking leave me alone. And I mean it this time. Don't even fucking talk to me." "Yn would you listen to me? Don't go inside the house!" What was this maniac saying? You stared at his figure getting out of the car and swiftly moving across over the lawn to your figure standing at the front door. "please just don't go inside the house." You noticed some figures behind him and you realised that Chan and his friends Jisung and Changbin were also there. "Minho what the fuck are you doing?" Minho looked at with what you thought looked like an expression of pity. "Just please don't go inside the house."

No you weren't going to listen to him. Absolutely fucking not. The last time you listened to him, you ended up in a mud covered ditch. Not today. "Fuck you and fuck your fucking existence Minho! I'm not listening to one word that comes out of that stupid mouth of yours." Before Minho could stop you and before Chan called out your name, you opened the door with gusto, only to be met, not with the familiar scent of Eau de Perfume but with the stench of iron. Your world came crashing down again. Your parents. Lying dead. On the floor. Of your house. Covered in blood. You were frozen. You couldn't move. A sense of familiarity came over you. You knew this feeling. This feeling of feeling like a thousand icicles had pierced your veins. All that came to your mind was him. No this can't be September. September was his birthday! It can't be this bad. No please don't let September be bad. "Y/N. Princess are you alright?" "Min- Minho. They're- they're not. No." The tears weren't coming. This wasn't sadness this was shock. "Chan hyung can you get her out of here? Jisung call the police. Now. Y/N. Y/N what are you doing!" You had strode up to your parents' bodies. Your mom was covered in more blood than your dad. Your dad looked like he was peacefully sleeping. Your mum's head seemed bashed in. Oh god the smell of blood. That night. All that remained was that night. You were too immersed in looking at your parents, that you didn't notice the creeping black figure in front of you. "So you're their daughter are you?" That husky voice was the last thing you heard before a gun shot, Minho's voice and the thud of your body. There was something warm on your stomach. And gooey. And red. This felt nice, you thought. Dying felt nice. If only he felt like this before....

Chan and Changbin slammed the man who had stabbed you onto the wall, destroying some photo frames in the process. Jisung turned on all the lights and went over to the two other men to get a look at the stranger. Minho, on the other hand, had rushed to your side, picking you up in his arms, towel pressuring the wound on your stomach.

2: Just a little bit colder

"Well well well, Mrs Yoon. How are the children?" Your mother cowered in fear as your elder sister and your dad were tied up next to the fridge in the kitchen. Your twin brother and you were in the clutches of some buff looking men. Eleven years. That's all you were. Eleven fucking years. "Mr. Wang I promise I won't leak the papers. I swear on my children. Please do not harm us." Mr. Wang or whoever he was striding up and down the carpeted room, white papers in his scarred hand. "It's ok Y/Nnie. I'm right here. It's just another November. September will come soon won't it?" Your brother, Doowon tightly held your hand and calmed you down, as your tears threatened to escape from their prison. "Mr. Wang. Please I beg you. Please do not harm me. You have the papers. What more do you want?" Mr Wang smiled at your mother. A cold smile. Shivering and undaunted. "Oh my dear Danbi. I have the papers of course, but you know how I do my work. I do not like bitches who butt their heads into everything. So I want your children to see how their mother is a little bitch." Mr Wang pulled your mother's hair as she screamed and cried out. "Hey don't do that to my mom!" Your borther screamed out as you but the hand if the man who was holding you. Both of you escaped from the clutches of the two men as Mr Wang looked on, slightly amused. "Or what little boy? You gonna beat me up?" Your brother stood his ground, not even daring to break eye contact. "Doowon get back please!" Your mum pleaded with Doowon, but he wouldn't listen. He stepped forward to Mr Wang and stepped painfully on his smooth black shoes. Mr Wang let out a cold laugh as he grabbed your brother by the neck of his shirt. "Grab the little girl too. Let her see how her twin meets with death." A man grabbed you from behind as your family pleaded and you thrashed around, trying to escape. "Let me go!" You screamed as the man took you upstairs while Mr Wang followed with your brother. You reached your bedroom door, which you shared with Doowon and Mr Wang slammed it opened pushing you and your brother inside. "Open that window, Brian." He spat at the man who grabbed you, while you and Doowon stood still. "Now boy. Come here. Come. Here. Now. Unless you want your sister harmed." Doowon looked at you and squeezed your hand before going ever to Mr Wang. And that was the last touch of your brother you had, before Mr. Wang pushed him out of the window on to the green grass below. Your screams had filled the neighborhood, scared the Magpies and threatened September to never come again. September's child,you told yourself. That's all he was. September's child, at the mercy of October.

"She'll be alright Minho. Just give her a few hours. She'll wake up." You were lying on an oak bed with grand purple bedsheets. You had a white sheet wrapped around your waist and your stomach, which stopped blood from coming out of your stab wound. Minho had taken you to his mansion outside of town, where all the sons of the mafias of Korea would hang out. Bang Chan, Seo Changbin, Hwang Hyunjin, Minho's brother Lee Felix Yongbok, Han Jisung, Kim Seungmin, Yang Jeongin and Lee Minho. Stray kids, they called themselves. Basically abandoned by their workaholic parents and brought up by relatives. "Hyung she'll be fine don't worry. Seungmin's aunt is the best surgeon in the country. She stitched Y/N up all fine." Changbin put an arm on Minho's shivering shoulder. Chan and Jisung were also there in the room, trying to comfort Minho and convince him that you would be fine. "What if she's not ok hyung? What do I tell her when she wakes up? Ho-how do I explain to her how I knew that her parents' bodies would be lying in her floor before she even got home? How do I fucking explain that?" Minho looked up at Chan with teary eyes. Chan was worried. Minho hadn't eaten or drunk water for the whole day, ever since you came out of that four hour long surgery. Never before had he seen Minho's cold face so filled with emotion. "Minho listen to me. You can explain everything to her once she wakes up. I called her sister and she'll be coming over in three days from Busan. Now please. You've got to eat something or drink water atleast. I promise you, Y/N will understand if you speak to her properly. Now come on, let's get some breakfast. It's 8 am in the morning. The boys would have woken up by now." Minho listened silently to Chan's words and simply nodded. Words weren't coming out anymore as he slowly got up from his chair and let go of your hand. Taking one last look at you, the boys left the room, all the while commanding two bodyguards to stand outside the door, making sure no one else can even come near you.

"Y/Nnie! Look what I can do!" "That wasn't a proper cartwheel Doowon, it doesn't count!" "Atleast I can do a cartwheel." "Yah don't stick your tongue out at me! Jinhee unnie! Doowon's making fun of me!"

'Do you remember? Twenty first night of September? Love was chasing the minds of pretenders.' "Happy birthday Doowon! I got a CD of your favourite song!" "Thanks Y/Nnie. Let's listen to this song on my birthday every year!"

Purple sheets? This was not your bed. Your bed had dinosaur sheets and made a rickety noise every time you moved. You noticed the white tape wrapped carefully around your waist and dared not touch it. You tried to remember what day it was and where you were as you slowly moved and leaned comfortably against the bed frame, groaning slightly as your stomach was hurting. Gosh what day was it? Was it still September? Or did October come to take you away again?

Lost in your thoughts, you looked around the room, trying to figure out whether you were still in Jeju Island or not. You noticed a drawer close to the bed. Curious, you opened the drawer, to find your phone, a bracelet and a picture of a you and Minho in your jerseys. That bracelet. It was the one which your brother had made for you. Which you hadn't seen ever since that day. And the picture was the one which was taken when you and Minho were elected captains of your basketball teams. You grabbed your phone hurriedly as you realised that this had to be Minho's house. You had to get out. Now. Your memory was coming back to you and you remembered the events that had unfolded the night before. Blood. The smell of iron. The blade of a knife. The tears of a plum brown haired boy.

You threw the sheets off of yourself and made to get up. Stupid decision, you told yourself as the moment your feet hit the floor, you fell down witha loud thud. "OUCH!" you cried out loudly, hoping that this was a soundproof house. Probably not, because five seconds later, you heard footsteps coming down to your door. The oak door swung open with a loud crash to reveal a panic stricken Minho, who had dark circles under his eyes, a worried looking Chan, who was clutching a half finished piece of toast and a very confused Seungmin, who was holding a cup of coffee in his hand. "I knew I shouldn't have left your clumsy ass alone." Minho grumbled as he made his way to you and gently lifted you up, taking care not to touch your injury. You should have probably thrashed around, but for the sake of not accidentally injuring yourself even more, you resisted, as Minho put you back on the head and flicked your forehead painfully. "Yah!" You exclaimed rubbing your forehead. "Ok first of all, where the fuck am I? Second of all, what the fuck am I doing here? Third of all, I know my parents are dead now, so what I am going to do?" You directed the last question at Chan, who scratched his hair and glanced at Seungmin, who was looking at you as if you were his hero. "You know noona, you can come stay with me if you don't wanna stay in Minho's hyung's house." Minho glared at Seungmin as Chan took him by the arm and forced him out of the room, before saying "Minho explain everything. And no I will not help you stop pouting." He slammed the door, leaving Minho and you all alone. All alone in this wood carved room. All alone to face September together. "Alright" Minho took in a deep breath. "Im going to explain everything to you princess. But you will not fucking interrupt me, got it?" You opened your mouth to fire something back at him, but you decided against it in the last moment and quietly nodded. "Alright here goes. First of all I am really sorry for bringing up your brother. I know it was an asshole move and I thought you'd have forgotten about it. Clearly you didn't so I'm sorry. Please forgive me. Second of all, yes your parents are dead. Im sorry Y/N but they are. We informed your sister, she'll come in a few days from Busan. And the reason I knew that your parents were dead and tried to stop you was because my cousin killed your parents." Pause button. Wait what?

"Minho what are you talking about? If this is some kind of joke I will seriously kill myself right here and right now." Minho looked at you with an expression of pure sympathy. "It's not a joke Y/N. You know your mom is the head of the Jeju Island branch of Chan's parents' buisness right? Well all our businesses are connected. And one day when you were a child, your mother had found some papers which proved that my family was in illegal work. My family was ready to forgive her but my cousin, Jackson, wasn't. All those papers were related to his dealings and he wasn't happy that a mere woman had found out about it. So one day, without my parent's knowledge, he found out about your family and well. I think you know the rest don't you?" Too many things. Too many things for your brain to process as it went back to that night. Mr Wang. Jackson Wang. Pretty name, you thought, as you tried to bring his face back to your memory. Scarred. That's all you remembered. Scarred face, scarred mouth, scarred hands grabbing your brother by the cuffs on his shirt. "Chan had found out first. You know him having contacts and all. And when he told me about it, there was this thing inside of me that told me that your parents were probably already dead. I know my cousin pretty well. And he isn't one for patience." "But what did my mom do now?" Minho sighed at your question. "She, she found out some more information about Jackson and she decided to step up. But we all know what happens to heroes don't we?" Your breathing had gotten more steady now and your hands had stopped shaking. Sadness wasn't arriving for you. Not yet. Was it September? Or was it because you never actually knew your mother and father? Because thinking about it, you actually never did.

"Y/N I think it's time to tell you what my parents actually do. What all the boy's parents actually do. We run an underground syndicate over the whole of South Korea. We own every piece of land in Korea. We have information about every person existing in this country. And I want to tell you that your mom was actually one of the most important people for our 'buisness'. She wasn't just some head of the Jeju Island branch. She was a personal spy for my father and mother, put here along with your dad, to spy against, uh, some people." Your head hurt even more with all the information that Minho was unloading on you. You held your head in your hands and massaged your temples gently. Minho looked slightly worried at this and nervously asked, "You ok princess? Want some breakfast?" Oh gosh his lips. "Or a doctor? You know what I'll get a doctor. Chan hyung will say no-" Those lips looked so kissable" "- but what if you don't feel well later on a faint and then you become even more sick-" Don't kiss him Y/N don't you dare. "-and then I'll have to marry you and take care of you foreve-"

Yep you couldn't keep it to yourself anymore. "I wanna kiss you." You blurted out, instantly cringing and regretting your words and Minho turned his head towards you, eyes wide and mouth slightly parted in surprise. "This is adream right? Oh shit I had too much coffee." You were surprised at his words. Wait did he dream of this in a regular basis or what? Or were in you in a coma and this was all in your head? You slightly moved in the bed and as your stomach slightly hurt, you thought, yes definetly not a coma. "Or you could just get me some breakfast? Im hungry and in pain right now." "O-oh yeah I'll just tell t-the guys to get you some. K cool bye Y/N! See you later definetly don't wanna kiss you haha bye!" You were in a state of euphoria as Minho left the room, a blushing mess. Did you just make the Lee Minho blush and stutter? Oh you could jump in joy right now. Well if you could jump. Was this wrong, you thought. Not feeling sad even though your parents had just died? Or were you too familiar with sadness, that meeting her wasn't a big deal anymore?

The door opened again after fifteen minutes to reveal a blonde- haired boy with the most prettiest eyes you've ever seen, carrying a breakfast tray, followed by a taller long haired boy, who looked like he came straight out of those anime comics you read. "Hey noona! Here's some breakfast! Are you feeling better now?" The blonde haired boy, who had a very deep voice, said in a cheery tone. You considered asking him if he was a pixie or an angel because God did he emit that vibe. That positive vibe that just made you wanna pick some flowers and braid them in someone's hair. "Oh hello there. Um thank you for the food. Im sorry if it was of any inconvenience to you." This time, the long haired boy responded instead, saying "Oh no Noona it's fine. Minho hyung would kill us, well specifically me, if, according to his words 'you felt any discomfort', so please eat up. Im Hyunjin by the way and this is Felix." "Im Y/N. Yoon Y/N. But I'm guessing you already knew that?"

"Well of course we know about you. Minho hyung doesn't stop talking to me about you." Jisung had just appeared at the door, dressed in a leather jacket with leather pants, making him look like a biker. "He literally talked to me about your favourite ice cream flavour for five house noona I'm not joking. So please would you tell him you like or something so that I can get out of this hellhole of listening to him?" You were slightly taken aback by Jisung's words and as he plopped and deflated onto the purple couch, you looked at him with a curious expression, "Oh I'm Jisung by the way. Minho's amazingly talented best friend." You heard Hyunjin mutter something along the lines of 'he forgot to add annoying'. "Um I have a lot questions that Minho didn't properly answer. May I ask them,if you don't mind?" You directed this question at Felix, who looked ecstatic at the thought of answering questions, as Hyunjin pulled up two chairs. "Yeah of course Noona! My brother is really vague so please forgive him for that." You smiled at Felix's words about Minho. "Ok first of all where are we right now?" "We're in the outskirts of Jeju Island. This is Minho's hyung's mansion. Well technically our mansion, but my parents are the ones who own it. It's really old and no one cares about it. So we carry out our, er, operations here." Seeing Felix say all that was like seeing a chick with a knife. "So do all of you have like different jobs here? Like in the books and movies?" Hyunjin chuckled at that. "Minho hyung told us you liked suspense literature. Well to answer your question, yes we do have different jobs here. Chan hyung is kind of like our leader. He basically gives all the contacts and manages our profile and connections. You know all the administration shit. Changbin hyung and this idiot over here-" He gestured towards Jisung who gasped dramatically, "-they are our muscle and also so the money work. Lix over here does all the hacking work since his parents trained him and also since he's obsessed with gaming." Felix turned red at that, "Seungmin and Jeongin are our snipers. They are really young but I mean none of us really had an actual childhood. I run the interrogation work. And Minho hyung basically does everything. He doesn't really have a designated position." The way Hyunjin said all of that in the most casual tone weirded you out. He talked as if he was talking about morning coffee, as if it completely normal and nothing suspicious. You smiled awkwardly at Hyunjin who simply stared out the window at the sunlight. "Are all of you so gorgeous over here?" You blurted out, to which Jisung choked on his own saliva, Felix blushed pink and Hyunjin blinked multiple times. "I mean unless you count Jisung out, then yeah all of us are really pretty." You laughed at Hyunjin's statement to which Jisung looked like a furious squirrel.

"Yah Yongbok, Hyunjin are you coming down?" You heard Minho shout from below. "Oh gotta go. Anyways it was nice talking to you noona! I think Minho hyung called the doctor to come in the evening, so you should probably rest up until then. Oh and-" Felix paused for a moment and pulled out a sketchpad from nowhere. "Don't tell Minho I have you this. He told me you like to draw so I sneaked this in here." With that, all of them left you in the room, with a sketchpad, your phone and September's tunes.

You wiled away the hours by drawing the room around you. You tried to draw Hyunjin, Felix, Jisung and Chan too. The house was quiet apart from the voices of whom you assumed was Jeongin and Seungmin talking very loudly. But something was distracting you. That bracelet. The bracelet lying on the bedside drawer. You knew that bracelet very well. It was the bracelet which Doowon had made for you when you were eight or so. And you hadn't ever seen it ever since that night. So what was it doing here? Minho had told you that his cousin and his family don't talk at all, so how was this bracelet here? Was Minho lying? No he wouldn't do that. Yes mortal enemy things but you didn't think this man would be crazy enough to kill. You picked up the bracelet and twirled it in your hands. It was pretty, with gold lining the thing.

You noticed something on one of the biggest pink beads of the bracelet. The bead was... Open? It had a line tracing it as if it was a Pokemon ball, ready to split at any moment to reveal your Pokemon. Curious, you dig your nails into it to open it up. After a few minutes of difficulty (and you almost giving up), you managed to open the ball up. Inside was a tiny piece of folded paper. It was so tiny indeed, that you wondered how someone had managed to fold it. You dug the paper out and unfolded its many layers of folds. This definetly wasn't there when your brother had so lovingly made it for you. The paper was faded, but still looked relatively new. There were some words on it typed out in red, black and blue. The words:.

Yoon Doowon

Birth: September 21, 2005 (Age: Unknown)

Job: Hitman, Ally, Possible heir

Status: Alive

3: Take the weight off his shoulders

'Do you remember 22st night of September? Love was chasing the minds of pretenders all while dancing the night away."

"God boss can you turn that off? It's been playing for an hour now." A stout man, dressed in tight black clothes, which fitted his muscles was sitting spread eagle on a nice blue cushion chair. Sitting in front of him on a much more bigger chair, was a man dressed elaborately in a white mink stole, a pristine white suit, with rings of all colours adorning his fingers, and a big black brooch on a golden chain stuck to his suit. "I won't turn it off until the chorus Brian. You know I love this song don't you? And you shall listen to it until your ears bleed out." Brian groaned and leaned back in his chair. "When is Mr Wang coming?" The man asked Brian. "It's possible he'll be arriving in a few minutes sir. But don't worry. I have intel that he got the job done well and good." "And the little rat? What about her?" Brian shifted uncomfortably in his seat. "Well she might have gotten away. Lee's gang was there." The man threw his long hair back and threw off the stole, a frown and a red scar decorating his handsome face.

They were in a large room, an office, but it looked more like a King's throne room, where there were chairs for the ministers and wine glasses all decked with pink fluid. There was no door, but a few handing blue beads, which tinkled every now and then. "How could she have gotten away? Who did you send to kill them?" "I sent our best assassin sir." The man scoffed. "Well, clearly he wasn't the best. Does he have family?" Brian nodded in response to the question. "Good. Kill them." "Of course sir."

The blue beads tinkled as a heavily scarred man came into the room along with two bodyguards. "Mr Wang." The white draped man bowed deeply to Jackson who bowed back, only a bit. "Well well well Doowon. You did good. Your parents are dead. This deserves a toast. Shall we?" Doowon smirked at the man and got a green bottle from underneath the table. "Only the finest whiskey for you Mr Wang." Jackson chuckled coldly, taking a glass from the table and extending it forward to Doowon. "But-" Doowon said as he slowly uncorked the bottle. "I do not wish for your bodyguards to be here. You know how the Lee Family works? Even the most trusted allies can turn into back stabbers when their money is involved. " If Jackson Wang was startled, he didn't show it on his face. Instead he motioned for his guards to leave the room, who followed suit, although with a little uncertainty. Brian also left the room, leaving the two scarred men alone.

"Well then a toast. To me and you. Buisness partners." Doowon raised his glass in unison with Jackson, who drank up the whiskey quickly. "Mr Wang I have something to tell you." Jackson looked up at the younger man and waved his hand as if to say 'go on'. "First of all I just want to thank you for taking me in that night, when everyone thought I was dead. You were so ever so good with your observations to notice that I was only playing dead. And then you trained me and everything so thank you for that. And for telling me the truth about everything." Jackson simply nodded. He felt a sharp jab in his stomach and his head started to stir. Doowon was going out of focus now and in what seemed like a split second, Jackson Wang rolled off of the chair, onto the floor. Dead. "But I wanted to tell you sir." Doowon spoke to the limp body on the floor. "That I would like to take over by myself now. You're getting too old and I don't want you to interfere in my personal matters."

"How do you feel now Y/N? Better?" A pretty older woman was checking up on you. She wore a doctor's coat with the nametag 'Dr Kim' on it. She was Seungmin's aunt, the surgeon who had saved your life. "Well the pain has subsided a bit Dr.Kim. I still feel a bit dizzy every time I move, but I think I'm good now." Dr Kim warmly smiled at you as she checked your heartbeat. "Well in any case, I think you'll be fine by tomorrow. You can even walk around tomorrow if you like. But for now, just get some more sleep. I'll tell Minho and the boys not to disturb you alright?" Dr Kim gently squeezed your hand and packed up her equipment. She spoke to you as if you were her own child, with such delicate words and a comforting voice, something that your mother never gave you. "Um Dr Kim? Could you ask Minho to come up here please? If you don't mind?" "Of course honey! I'll ask him. Take care now." She gently kissed your forehead and went out the door.

"You wanted to see me?" Minho was dressed in a blue shirt, slightly open at the top and white pants. He looked so.... refined. And hot, exactly like a K drama CEO. God damn he looked delicious. Don't lick your lips. Do not lick your fucking lips Y/N. "Yeah I have some questions." Minho groaned as he shut the door and came forward to sit on the bed. "What now?" "Where did you get this bracelet?" You held up the bracelet to Minho, who looked at you, perplexed. "That's my bracelet, for your information. My mother gifted it to me. It's been in my family for centuries." Wait what now? "Minho stop fucking lying would you? My brother gave me this as a surprise gift when I was ten. And it went missing ever since the day he fucking died! So could you please tell me where the fuck you got this? Or I'm getting out of this bed and asking Chan." "Woah there princess." Minho looked at you, worried at your outburst. "Alright don't get out of bed please. I don't want you bleeding out and dying. But I'm telling the truth. This is the bracelet my mother gave me when I was twelve. It's been passed on from generation to generation in the Lee Family. It's a special bracelet, because it has these tiny chits inside the beads, telling the person who opens it who the next leader of, well, underground South Korea is going to be."

Too much information again. Number one, you could not stop staring at Minho's pretty pink lips. Number two, why did the chit inside the bead have your brother's name? And why did it say that he was alive?" "Wh-who puts the chits inside of this?" You asked Minho, carefully hiding the chit inside of your hand. "Well my uncle Wang dies. Jackson's dad. His great great great grandpa was the one who made this bracelet. So he has the right to choose the heir." "Minho I think you need to see this." You handed Minho the faded chit. He looked at it for a solid fifteen seconds before looking at you, blinking rapidly, just like how he does whenever someone surprises him. "Y/N oh fuck. Shit come on get up. Quick. I'll help you." "Wait Minho what? What happened?" You asked Minho as he gently wrapped his arms around your waist, supporting you as you slowly got out the bed, and onto your legs. "Y/N we need to get to a safer place. If- if what this chit says is true, you're in more danger than I thought." "Wait Minho stop. Would you stop for a moment? Minho- Lee Minho!" You shouted his name, which made him stop in his tracks, arms still supporting your waist, even though you could still walk fine. "Would you please explain to me what's going on?" "Come down to the hall." Minho sighed and told you. "The boys, except Chan hyung, don't know either. So I can tell them and you at the same time. It'll be easier won't it?"

You nodded, not saying anything. Your mouth was dry and words were not escaping it. Gosh September was meant to be good. Why was it so full of surprises?

"Yah Minho Hyung! Auntie told noona can't get up until tomorrow." Seungmin said to Minho as both of you cam doen the stairs. All of the boys were pin the living room, immersed in their own work. Seungmin and Jeongin were playing chess and Chan was on his laptop as usual. "Chan hyung. I think I've figured out who the Mink Thief is." Chan's head snapped from his laptop to Minho so fast, that you swore you heard a cracking sound. The other boys' attention was also now on Minho. "Are you joking or are you actually telling the truth right now?" Minho smiled at Chan's words and set you down on the couch next to Changbin gently. "No I am not joking. Look at this." He handed Chan the bracelet and the chit, which Chan twirled in his gorgeous fingers, all the while looking at it as if it was some alien substance. "Oh fucking hell. Not him?" Minho nodded at Chan's exasperated words as Chan slumped in his chair, setting his laptop down on the table. "Can anyone explain what's going on please? Minho hyung?" Felix asked. "Alright bitches-" "language Minho" "Hyung stop being so old. Alright bitches listen up. So first of all let me introduce you to a man named Yoon Doowon, also known to us as The Mink Thief, who has been sending our families threats for a long time, also know to Y/N as her dead brother." "Yah! Rude!" "Anyways, one thing that Chan hyung found out a few days ago is that The Mink Thief has been in contact with my cousin, Jackson, ever since the day of Y/N's brother's murder. Also Y/N," he paused at looked into your eyes. "Whatever I'm about to say next will probably shock you so please don't faint out of surprise." You looked at Minho with the best offended eyes you could.

Minho then continued in a much more serious voice, "Yoon Danbi, Y/N's mom has been a spy for my family ever since I was born. Her and her husband had been placed here in Jeju Island along with their only daughter Yoon Jinhee, for an important mission. But soon, people grew suspicious of how both of them would act all the time, leaving their daughter alone for such long periods of time, coming home late at deadly hours and blah blah blah. So, in order to make their family seem much more 'normal', they took in two children. Choi Doowon and Jeon Y/N." "Minho what the fuck are you saying right now." Why were there so many surprises? Was your entire life a lie? Were you adopted for some stupid mission or something? What kind of Marvel shit was this? "Yeah this is why I said, don't faint out of shock." Minho slightly chuckled as Chan looked at repramandingly. "Look yes it's true your parents aren't your real parents. But the thing is your didn't even have parents. You came straight from the orphanage. So when my family took one look at you, someone with no background information which can be traced, they thought you were perfect for this mission. I mean, think of it Y/N, haven't you ever saw your parents hiding any documents from you or getting afraid when you asked for your birth certificate whenever you needed to register for your basketball games?" Yes, when you thought about it, they did do that.

"Hyung don't you think you should have had this conversation somewhere more private?" Felix looked from your distraught face to Minho's. "We probably should have but I have shit to tell all of you too." Minho said to his younger brother. "When Doowon supposedly died that night, Jackson Wang got a new partner in crime. Doowon was probably still alive. I know that no one can survive a fall like that, but I seriously don't know how he survived. So what I'm assuming from this tiny chit here, is that Jackson probably told Doowon the truth about his true parentage and all, and then like a basic villain, Doowon wanted revenge and now Y/N's life is basically a fantasy novel." "Ain't that right?" You scoffed. "My entire fucking life is a lie. I mean is my name even Y/N? Are we just living in a hallucination? What if all humanity is meant to do is just live our boring lives until a giant space turtle comes along and kills us all?" "That would be a cool way to die." Jisung said, not even a bit surprised by your rambling. "Jisung." Chan looked at Jisung with a glare. "Alright listen up everybody. Now that the sad backstory is out the way, we need to get down to buisness. First of all we need to get Y/N somewhere safe. Well safer. So Y/N, would you be willing to go along with Jisung, Jeongin and Seungmin?" You nodded at Chan, who looked very relieved. "Great. Felix, Hyunjin, would both of you search out if Vernon's mansion is still protected and everything? " Felix and Hyunjin replied 'yes' to Chan and quickly went out the room. "Um noona we should get going. Can you walk by yourself?" Seungmin stood up and extended a hand to you, which you gratefully took and got up. "Yeah I can walk don't worry. Um where are we going?" Seungmin smiled at you, revealing his braces. "Don't worry about that. Just follow me to the car."

Fifteen minutes later, you were sitting in the back of a Bentley with Jisung, with Seungmin driving and Jeongin stared out the window, sitting quietly in the passenger seat. "You're lucky Minho hyung gave us his car noona." Jisung commented. "He never even lets us touch it. But then again, we're with you, so I guess that makes up for it." You looked at Jisung's wavy hair and thought to yourself that how can a sweet boy like him, be Minho's best friend. "Jisung, when you said Minho doesn't stop talking about me to you guys, what exactly does he talk about?" "Oh noona I could write an entire seven book Series about that " Seungmin responded instead of Jisung. "He doesn't ever stop talking about what your favourite song is, or what you wore today or how your hair falls in such a perfect way. And when we tell him to just tell you that he is pathetically in love with you, he sulks and says that he would rather kill himself." Well that was certainly surprising. "Oh we're here." Jeongin said, as the car pulled up to a massive iron gate, which had the letters C, H and V on it. What it was guarding was a massive black mansion, which looked very much like a vampire's lair, covered in vines of ivy with a statue of bat hanging out in the big yard. "Chwe Hansol. Also known as Vernon. This is his mansion. He's a good friend of Chan Hyung's and he lets us use the mansion whenever we want. It's the safest place in Jeju Island so we'll be good here noona." Jisung told you, as you stepped out of the car. The mansion looked so ethereal and as you walked into the yard through the gate, you wondered if this was the mansion which was described in the story of the vampire Carmilla. You lived and breathed for that story and you were excited at the thought of hiding in a place which looked exactly like Carmilla's mansion, where she took the blood of her lover, weeping over her body, and complaining about her death.

The boys pushed open the big dual doors of the mansion with difficulty, but not before Jisung had entered a pass code on the tiny keyboard thing which was on the right side of the door. This was indeed Carmilla's mansion, you thought as you entered the big living room, which was decked from head to toe in gold and silver. There was a magnificent chandelier hanging from the ceiling, along with busts of some vague looking people.

"Gosh this is so pretty." You said to Seungmin, who smiled and said "Wait till you see the ball room." You were about say 'theres a ball room here?' when suddenly the lights went out. "Ah fucking hell. Guys stay here with noona. I'll go and see what's wrong." You heard Jisung's voice. "I don't think you need to do that, my dear Mr.Han." you heard a cold voice, which didn't belong to any of the boys. "Who's ther-" Before Seungmin could finish his sentence, you felt a hit to your head, and you blacked out, before hearing Jisung shout, "Noona!"

"Y/Nnie. Wake up." Doowon said in a sing song voice. The boys were tightly tied up to the chairs, with cello tape around their mouths. You were also tied up to the big blue cushion chair, with Doowon, standing in front of you, wearing a red coat and that mink fur stole. He had three bodyguards with him, all buffer than Changbin, all carrying guns and all looking scary as fuck. "Y/N wake up you stupid bitch." Doowon slapped your face painfully, which made you slightly stir. "Hey don't do that she's injured!" Jisung shouted out, having managed to chew through his cello tape. Doowon looked at Jisung with a sarcastic smile and said nothing, while one of the bodyguards punched Jisung. "Doowon?" You had woken up and the surroundings were appearing more clearly now. Your stomach hurt so much and your brain was still fuzzy, except for your dead brother standing in front of you, smirking. "Oh hey Y/Nnie. You miss me?" He asked you in a cold voice you didn't recognise. Never September. This was not September's child standing in front of you. This wasn't September's child, who used to chase butterflies and gift you cute little stones, standing in front of you. "Doowon you're alive." You managed to cough out some words, along with a bit of blood. "Ahh yes I am. I assume your stupid boyfriend already told you what happened to me. So I'm going to skip over the part where I explain shit to you." He let out a cold laugh which made you flinch. "Doowon this isn't you. What are you doing?" You asked him, tears welling up in your eyes. "This isn't me? No Y/N this is me. I've been lied to my entire life and Jackson Wang told me the truth. He taught me the way to survive in our world. He's dead now by the way. Just like our 'parents'." "Doowon please. Stop this lunacy! Atleast let the boys go they haven't done anything wrong!" Doowon leaned down to your level and lifted your chin with his finger. You shivered at his cold touch. "Aww Y/N. Always so fucking innocent. Baby the boys are leverage. Soon the rest of the boys will be here and then after some introductions, I can finally rule all of South Korea." Your tears had escaped now as you looked over at the boys, who were knocked unconscious by the bodyguards. You felt like the most lowest human being on earth, when you looked at Jeongin's bleeding lip, wondering what Chan's reaction would be when he arrived here. "Brian! Go check if the doors are open please. I want them all to waltz in here and call for these pathetic boys. And then we'll hit them where they don't even know it hurts. Maybe we'll start with this one." He moved over to Jeongin. The man named Brian laughed and winked at Doowon. "I'll get the door sir." He moved out the room swiftly.

Fifteen minutes had passed. Fifteen silent minutes. This was silence which you did not enjoy. Silence was sweet in September, when only the Magpies chirped. But now, as you watched Jeongin and Seungmin slightly stir, silence became bitter. "Is Brian not coming? You!" Doowon shouted at one of the guards. "Go out and see where he is! Does it take this much time for the rascal to come back?" The guard obeyed and made to get up from his seat on a rickety wooden chair. BANG! A bullet shot went through the guards head, and as he slumped to the ground, with a pool of blood around his head, Doowon screamed and grabbed Jisung by his chin. "You! What have you done!" Jisung merely smirked at him as Doowon lay frozen there, staring at the body. "Oh for fucks sake what are both of you doing?" Doowon spat at the two remaining guards. "Go upstairs and check if the rats have entered the house already!" The guards nodded their heads fervently and went off in opposite directions, only to be met with two gunshots. The door burst open, as Minho and the remaining boys barged in.

"Doowon." Minho said coldly to Doowon, who merely smirked, trying to hide the fact that he had peed his pants a bit. "Well you found me didn't you? Good job Minho. You know Mr Wang told me how your family works. So I'm honoured that I'm actually getting to experience a member of the great Lee family trying to kill me." You were disgusted by his words. Where did your sweet Doowon go? Where did the boy whom you had cried for day and night go? "Let the boys and Y/N go. Now Doowon. And we won't have any consequences." Chan said to Doowon. He looked furious. You hadn't ever seen Chan like this. "Oh you can take the boys first and then I'll give you Y/N." Hearing that, Changbin and Hyunjin hurried forward, untied the boys, who were concious by now and supported them on their arms, as they carried them back to safety.

"Now Y/N's turn. Give her back to me Doowon and maybe you won't end up choking on your own blood tonight." Minho's voice made your heart go warm. He had nothing but cold fury in his voice. If you thought you had seen his anger on that one particular basketball match in Busan, you were mistaken.

"Now why would I do that? Sweet little Y/N is all ok tied up to his chair aren't you Y/Nnie?" He pulled your hair and kicked you hard in your stomach, which made you cough out blood. Yep, the stitches in your stomach had probably opened up. Fuck no, not now. Don't die in September. Let me wait for October. October seemed more comforting now. The Magpies had their babies in October. Im October, you could get boba on discount. In October, you could hand out with your friends whenever you want. In October, Minho would turn a year older. Wait how did you know that? Why was this room so fuzzy? Hey Minho's face. His beautiful face. It was going out of focus now. Good way to die isn't it. You hoped death came to you, wrapped in white silk and picked you up in her arms like a baby and put you in a cradle. A cradle painted orange and yellow. A cradle with Magpies on it. A cradle which loved all the months equally. But especially October. Especially October.

"Doowon, stop that! Stop fucking hurting her!" Minho screamed at Doowon. You were blacked out now and as Minho looked at your gently sleeping figure, his heart dropped to the bottom of his stomach. "And what if I don't? What will you do oh great Lee Minho? I have her in my arms and I can do anything I wa-" That was the last thing Minho heard before all he saw was Doowon's dumb face, struck with shock, bullet hole in his big head, blood staining his already red suit and his stupid mentality finally gone from this world. "Good job Minho. Now come on let's get Y/N. Guys get Jisung, Seungmin and Jeongin to the car. We'll get Y/N." Chan told the others, while Minho had already strode over to you. He hurriedly untied the ropes around your arms and legs and got you to his arms, fingers looking for your wrists, to check your pulse. Tears were coming out now. Tears he never knew would come for you. He loved you. So much. So much it was honestly pathetic. The way you scowled everytime you saw him, the way your eyes lit up whenever you got a high test score, the way you cherished December for your birthday, the way you existed. He loved everything about you. And he can't lose you. Not now. Not ever.

"Feeling good kitten?" You had woken up in Minho's house again, with Dr Kim checking your heartbeat and adjusting your blood pump. "Minho." You managed to breath out weakly, making Minho's heart drop again. He was quick to stand up and cup your face in his arms gently as tears poured out of your eyes. "Hey hey hey don't cry." He said so gently, in a tone which he never used with you. "No Y/N. Shh. I've got you. You're safe. You're safe." He hugged you gently, supporting your head with his hands as you silently sobbed into his shirt. Once you pulled away, you noticed that his shirt was wet from all the crying and that his eye bags were more prominent. "Im sorry. I'm so sorry Minho. I-I really didn't know about..... about him and I caused you all this trouble. I am so sorry." "Hey hey princess. Y/N listen to me." You looked into his eyes, which were twinkling into yours. "None of it is your fault. You hear me? None of it. If anything, I should have told you all that I know earlier but I couldn't. Because- because I- I love you Y/N." That was it. That's all it took. That's all it took, for your eyes to widen, your hands to reach up to his jaw and for your lips to meet his, in a slow dance accompanied by the melodies of the Magpies outside, celebrating that you two had finally realised your love for each other. You pulled away after what felt like a very short time, but you were running out of breath. Minho and you stared at each other for a while and then burst into giggles. "That felt nice princess. You sure you haven't kissed anyone before?" You slapped his chest playfully as you said "Yah! Don't make me think back about being your girlfriend Lee Minho." Minho's eyes lit up and he stuttered out "Girlfriend? Yep I'm in a dream someone pinch me." You rolled your eyes as you pinched him and he let out a tiny scream. "Oh stop so dramatic. How long was I out by the way? And are the boys alright?" "You were out for two days now kitten. And the boys are good. Jisung is saying he finally got his 'Wattpad best friend gets kidnapped moment' and I think Chan told Dr Kim to double his dosage of sleeping pills so now he's crashed out. And snoring loudly."

"Noona you're awake!" Felix had come into the room, well more like bounced into the room along with the rest of the boys, Seungmin sporting a cast, and Jeongin having a pink band-aid on his lip. Felix hugged you tightly while Chan hugged Minho. "Lix let her go. She needs to breath." Chan said to Felix, who had been hugging you for a long time now. "Seungmin, Jeongin are you guys ok now? I am literally so sorry." Jeongin smiled at you sweetly, his fox like eyes forming crescents and said, "We're good noona. Technically we should be asking you that question. And it's fine please don't apologise." He bowed a bit to you and as you tried to bow back, whilst sitting, Hyunjin said, to Minho "So hyung. Have you finally got your ass together and asked noona out?" Minho glared at Hyunjin as everyone else in the room laughed. "You will be getting your mouth stuffed tonight Hyunjin. And yes I have asked her out. And now she's my girlfriend." "Yah who said I was your girlfriend?" You jokingly said. "Ok I'm gonna ask Jisung out then." Minho said standing up.

Four years later

You had been living with Minho for four years now, as his live-in Girlfriend. He had introduced you to his parents, who had been nothing less that kind to you. They had first apologized profusely for the whole Doowon incident, to which you told them that you really didn't care. You had Minho with you and all of your past had slowly faded away.

And every year as October and September came, you learnt to cherish ,not the month, but the memories you made every day. You learnt to forever keep memories of you, your boyfriend, your friends and everyone around you. You learnt how to let go of grief easily.

And when Minho proposed to you, on the twenty first night of December, you learnt, you just needed someone a bit older, and a bit colder, to teach you what it meant to love a person like you'd love a month.

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