#but it sucks when i see other ppl get interesting stuff for their hobbies or whtv

[depthnessingsweet]

.

[totallynoteggos]

lol hey this is just a vent post abt my life rn I don’t really expect any on u to read this

Tw if you do read this: talk of Anxiety, ppl not understanding neurological limitations, talk of vauge self exit and SH (its very minor) overall vent post shit

Sorry u have to see me in such a shifty mental state but I need to get this off my chest before I resort to violence

Once again, not KND stuff this is a Vent Post

I’m not neurotypical by any means I'm on some spectrum but all we know so far is that I have OCD and Anxiety. Also I'm going into the 9th grade which that In of itself is a stressful situation but in the last four years I've never stayed in the same school so seeing the same people is hella new to me. I have this really bad habit of going no contact with people after the school year is over because I usually never see them again. My mom can't seem to understand that there are simply things I can't do because of the anxiety & OCD (and I'm not using this as a reason to act out or defy her) abt 2 weeks ago we went to get food, now usually I order my food to make sure I get what I like and not have a mixup. And pls notice this was after a week long “vacation” that ended up being stressful and draining. But anyways there was a mixup and I ended up with a burger with all toppings instead of plain, which caused me to panic because I was hungry and stressed before already. And instead of trying to accommodate she stood firm in her beliefs that I need to get over it and just eat the damn burger. And I heavily insisted on not eating it and eating the fries instead. After a argument (and at the instance of my grandma) she bought me another burger and while in line I told her outright that there are some things that I physically can't do or else they send me into a panic. She that said that she “gets that” but I don't have to act out In front of my grandma which she idolized. And now like I said with the whole start of school she's saying “it wont be your best years if you don't let it be your best years” but I don't think she understands that I don't know how to do that. I've moved around a lot and I've been made fun of a lot due to my interests, hobbies and simply just to be the clown. Most of the people I befriend end up getting annoyed or just keep me around until I say something that doesn't make me the dumb and “quirky” one. And like I said I suck at keeping contact and now everyone still has their old friend groups and mine just see me as a joke or weirdo now. Its stressing me out so much and its only been two days, hell yesterday I would have thrown up from the stress but because I was so stressed I didn't eat shit so I didn't throw up. School stresses me out so much it's unimaginable, its the people, the sounds, the halls, the fact that people won't leave you alone, someone always talking or screaming, just please shut the fuck up so I can learn and be out of here. And god its so fucking hard not feeling what everyone else around you feels. My moms getting upset at me for not wanting to go on the busses when I have gone on one and it left 20 fucking minutes from my house cus the lady was screaming and I got scared as was about to cry. And now she wants me to try again with kids I don't fucking know who some how don't know personal space or manners. And back to the emotions things, why the fuck don't I feel the same as them, god I feel so fucking robotic compared to my mother and everybody else but they also make me feel like a god damned mutt. On one hand they think it's weird that I don't want to talk or to Interact but somehow don't realize that it's their fault I don't want to, and on the other hand whenever I'm upset or angry and actually show it its MY fault. Because apparently since I'm the youngest of my family im supposed to have the personality of pinkie pie and I have no problems. And because I'm quiet, friendly or just shy and I'm supposed to control my emotions because I'm a “young lady”. I've tried talking to my mom about home school because my school has that as a option but she says that I can't hide when she's been doing that too. Sometimes I feel like she cares more for the happiness of those she wants to impress rather than that of her family. But god if all of life feels like this then count me out cus its too much to be alive right now. I think ima take a shot or three of night quill and hopefully sleep until ITs to late to go to school

Goodnight

[hwajin]

hey! the feedback anon back again

I mean, there’s nothing wrong with just writing for fun and just putting it out there flawed, things don’t have to be perfect to be worth sharing. it’s all just fun and if you want to tell a story you should tell it. its what makes the world go round.

but I think saying “I don’t know how to do it differently” isnt true! have you tried taking a few steps back, coming back to edit it after? check out how other writes do it, learn from them? I think if you wanted to spend the time, and again, it’s optional, it’s a hobby, you could definitely learn. like if you’re aware you overexplain, why don’t you go back over a passage and delete some of it and then read it again to see if it still makes sense? ask a reader for feedback?

idk, I’m just rambling and it’s all up to you, but I think if you tried, you could fix these things <3 it just takes time and some courage and application, but effort always equals reward

take care~

i mean i probably could at some point write differently, but then again, idk i rlly could if that makes sense jfjsjdjd. also, if i even want to — the way i write now suits a certain type of writing i feel like, and i rlly rlly like the way i write, when it comes to drabbles and one-shots. changing my style would mean getting weaker in what i feel confident in, i think. i always say this, serieses and long stories etc etc are my number one weaknesses, and no matter how often i take inspiration from other writers on here i think my writing style simply isn't rlly fit for long stories. like, to a certain point i do rlly think that i can't write differently. like, i have one writer on here in particular who i look up to immensly and no matter how often i read her stories, i can't get behind how she can write the way she writes — it's rlly fascinating because she has strengths everywhere where i have my weaknesses. then again, i sometimes see her saying that one-shots aren't rlly her thing; so yes, i maybe could write differently, but my series won't ever be as good as my one-shots, because everyone's strengths lay elsewhere, i feel like, and we can't master everything! it's kinda like an artist who specializes in a specific style of painting, and lacks in other parts; yes, they could become better at one style if they put enough effort in, but the style they prefer and have a maybe natural talent in will always be better and stronger, and come more naturally, i feel like.

and yes, i do edit my stuff, i do take steps back (probably too much lmao), but what i end up doing is adding things, actually, because it simply feels too vague and not deep enough when i first write it; then again the entire story isn't deep per se, so idk jfjejdj. as i said before, my problem is mainly my inabilty to create worlds because maybe my creativity is limited, or maybe my brain just comes up with stuff in a different way than other ppl's brains, esp those who are very much able to write serieses; even just today, while i was writing on chapter 3, i forgot if my character's a smoker or not, and i feel like that shows my writing process and the fact that i simply do not even know my own characters, because i'm not rlly, like, able to truly create them. it's kinda always been like this, too, long before i started writing for skz and when i still wrote for different artists; i've been trying to write serieses for ages and never even finished one before 'twin flames', and i only truly found my writing style when i discovered one-shots.

so, idk, ig if i rlly wanted to i could learn, in a way, to write serieses/ long story-lines, but then idk if i RLLY could esp since i've been trying to for so long, and it's nowhere near my strength, and also not entirely what i truly enjoy about writing!!! i just wanna dip my toes into smth different from time to time ig, it just sucks a bit that ppl aren't much interested in that!

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Heya! I just wanna first say I REALLY like your writing and it's so so cool to see some TD stuff on tumblr TwT the community is so small still so you are doing gods work here!!

I'm interested in a TD match up (possibly OM too if ur up to it!! either way idm<33)

- Name: Jay (nicknames: Bread, bug, jäyssi)

- pronouns: They/them

- sexuality: still figurin it out but I lean more towards men but also sometimes find women attractive too, non binary ppl are always a yes

- Zodiac/mbti: Cancer, ISFP-T

- appearance: 165cm tall, brunette ass lenght hair I usually just slick back using my headphones as a hairband. Always wearing noise cancelling headphones and prefer a more alternative style, almost also teetering to a 90's jock vibes :P small round sunglasses my beloved. Big love to suede leather bomber jackets and ripped jeans.

- Personality: Very empathetic, more of a listener than talker (unless it comes to my interests in which case I yap!!) Can come off as a bit monotone (I have alexithymia which causes emotions to be hard for me). I'm told I'm super approachable and comforting ^^" I get very excited over the little things and can be quite optimistic. I react quite badly to rejection or even the smallest failures.

- likes and dislikes: I LOVE snails, dandelions(my fav flower<33), anything mango flavored winter, art, everything and anything fluffy and listenin to music! I DISLIKE almost all fruits, summer, blood/gore (hemofobia), cooking (cooking anxiety), worded instructions.

- hobbies: I draw/paint digitally and traditionally. I always carry a sketchbook around everywhere :] I also really like going on easy hikes on forest trails as well as amateur photography!!

- extra info: I have autism/ADD so social stuff might suck and I can be very slow at times when it comes to learning stuff.

(If you're not currently doing matchups, please feel free to ignore this <3)

Hi Jay! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took a while. I hope you like your matchups!

In Tokyo Debunker, I match you with...

You and Towa make a good combination since you’re both good listeners and talkative at different times. When one of you is talking, the other is listening intently.

You like dandelions? Oh, Towa’s perfect for you! He’s always bringing you dandelions whenever he visits and plants them nearby so he has a constant supply.

I see him as someone who’s a fan of summer as well. He likes the feeling of the sun on his skin and enjoys going on walks through the Jabberwock fields with you.

He thinks it’s really cute that you have a fondness for fluffy things. There are plenty of those around Jabberwock and he’ll happily show them to you, as long as you show him some affection as well. His hair’s pretty fluffy after all…

Towa also thinks it’s really cute that you get so excited over little things. He thinks that sort of enthusiasm is much needed in the world and it’s lovely being around you.

In Obey Me, I match you with...

Simeon was first drawn to you because of your comforting presence. And the more time he spent with you, the more he fell for you.

Much like Towa, Simeon thinks it’s sweet how excited you get over little things. He feels he doesn’t have to hide his own excitement when he’s around you.

He’s a very creative person himself so he loves sitting by you when you paint or draw. He likes being around the creative process since it makes him feel inspired as well.

I can definitely see him as someone who likes photography and would really enjoy going on walks with you where you each take a camera and compare photos when you get back.

Simeon’s pretty good in the kitchen himself so as long as you don’t mind the company, he’d love to join you. If you prefer cooking by yourself, he’ll happily just have some of whatever delicious food you’ve whipped up.

[selfshipping-central]

Okay okay okay *inhales deeply*

First of all: I'd like a male character, if platonic or romantic is irrelevant to me and I'm leaving that up to you.

So my personality is pretty bubbly I'd say, I can talk a shit ton and keep a conversation going as long as I'm interested in it, if I'm not you'll most likely notice bc I'm not good at hiding my non exited interest in things (and I don't want to hide it either). I'm out going, I love to meet new ppl - both irl and online. But I can also listen. Like sitting still and keeping eye contact is not something I can do but I can stare at a wall and listen to people for hours - I forget most of it the second they end their sentence but that's bc my short term memory is trash (thank you social media, you ruined my brain for good)

I love art. No matter what type of art. Poetries, stories, painting, music whatever it is I love it. I also love my hyperfixations and will teach you the lore of whatever it is that's stuck in my head - I usually send like 10 minutes voice messages to my bestie just rambling about whatever's going through my head. I love to watch the stars, out of my friend group I'm the star (my childhood bestie is the moon, my other bestie's the moon) so that only makes sense ig

My personality type is ENFP if that helps idk.

My hobbies are bouldering, skating, painting, writing uhhh going on late night drives w das homies. I design and sew clothes, I create OCs (sometimes) I'm super interested in fashion bc that shit's simply my thing. I know how to style stuff to make it look good (my friends literally ask me for advice sometimes which makes my lil fashion heart bloom, I love to channel my inner Velvette)

I'm pretty self reflected and self aware, I curse a LOT (trying my best to not write "fuck" or "fucking" in every sentence, it's hard) I am confident mainly bc idc what ppl think about me, like fuck em who r they to judge?

I have short, messy brown hair, green eyes and fucking pale skin (basically a vampire at this point) before I get tan I get my skin burned bc my skin's sensitive af. I do have freckles though they're more visible during summer. I'm 5'3 ish, dress like your typical skater punk and love to wear eyeshadow (brown eyeshadow simply looks good on me)

People say I'm funny so I'm gonna say I'm funny. Uh I think that should be it.

Fandom: Helluva Boss

Blitzø!! (Romantic)

After knowing you for a while (not enough we must be friends for life shawty) we are very Blitzø coded.

Which is why you need him to be your partner in crime!!

100% rants to you about his love for horses

Will get all lovestruck when you take him horse riding!!

"I had no clue I could fall in love with you anymore. But holy fuckin' hell babe... I'm going to suck the shit outta your dick tonight."

Your personalities mesh so well together!!

He's your hype man!!

And you're his!!

"Yeaaa!! You get him babe!!! That's my boyfriend you know. Did I mention I suck his dick every night? Fuck him up danger dick!!"

Both of you forgetting literally everything. It's so bad please take either Millie or Moxxie with you when you're on missions.

This is the both of you -> (´･ω･`)?

"Wait what were we gonna do?"

"I don't remember."

"Fuck- Moxxie what are we doing?"

Adores all forms of your art. Thinks your patchwork is so sick!! Your painting and writings too!! He loves all of it!!

"Holy shit- You made that jacket? Babe. Can you make me one?"

He finds your sense of fashion so hot. The whole vibe is so hot to him. Just watching you walk around all relaxed and confident has him all black in the cheeks and flushed. (Cause they have black blood see what I did there hehe ( •̀ ω •́ )P )

"Fuck. Your outfits make you look so hot..."

Doesn't mind listening to your ramblings but he must have his turn to ramble too!! ♪(^∇^*)

"Wait so the British man- kills kids?? Slow down- start again what is this about a robot bear-"

Seeing as me and him have the same MBTI type (ENTP gang pull up) You will get along just fine with him.

Please please please please I beg of you get into debates or arguments with him, spice up your life. I'm saying this with personal experience that if you don't jokingly bicker with each other shit gets so boring so fast.

Besties that are dating vibes.

Thinks that your skating is so cool too.

"Do a flip!! Oh shit he did a flip-"

You swear a lot? He swears a lot. Don't worry about it.

"FUCK FUCK FUCK- Ohh shit!! MOXXIE GET YOUR FLAT ASS IN HERE RIGHT NOW!! OR I'LL CUT OFF MY OWN DICK AND IMPALE YOU WITH IT FOR FUCKS SAKE!!"

Wants you to do makeup on him but is too scared to ask.

Steals your clothes I don't make the rules.

[weirdagnes]

About artists

posting at a random time, and i know i dont usually post about my day, especially publicly. but I feel so happy today.

Just got home from an art exhibit that I submitted in, and the feeling of first time travelling to a new place with my artist friends, seeing my art displayed on the wall among other AMAZING AF art from long time artists, and meeting artists of different ages, of different styles - drag performers, musicians and composers, digital artists, painters, tattooists, photographers, etc - it just feels so cool to be in the same artspace hangout with these people!

I didn’t talk to a lot of them because I’m not extroverted enough, so I just mostly settled with listening to their conversations. And the vibe of the whole exhibit just makes me truly appreciate how cool my artist friends are, how cool my professor is, and how cool artists are when they’re gathered in a comfortable place.

It’s an amazing experience to talk about your interests and the person doesn’t judge that you like cartoons or weird stuff, bc they’re just as into it as you are because artists get it. They get it, and they embrace the weird or strange side of art, and they are willing to explore the strangeness. The lack of restrictions and shame to liking what you like, creating what you envision, and willing it to life - it’s refreshing. No one putting down your artistic interests because it’s “childish” or “devil-worshipping” or “it’s a waste of time”, it’s just people understanding and people looking at your art - struck in wonder - and telling you a whole different perspective about your art that you have never even thought of. What you think sucked about your art was given new meaning, and it really pulls you out of your own head on how you view your art.

It makes me appreciate the respect my artist friends have on me, because they’re such amazing people themselves and have incredible art skills and for them to praise my art in high regard is uplifting, like omg cool and insanely talented ppl noticing me im ple pleade im jus a simple ape that makes silly doodles i

I’m honestly tearing up a bit, because I feel so grateful that I’m surrounded with supportive and art-positive people in a shitty country that sets art aside as a useless hobby.

Hanging out with artists face-to-face, joining a circle of artist friends, seeing older, long time artists - it’s honestly very empowering and encouraging. If you’re an artist reading this now, you’re literally cool, dont stop creating!

Para sa sining!🤘

[bokutosbiceps]

HIII!! I hope your having a great day…! I saw you take matchups but I’m not sure if your requests ar woken or not but I think they are—? Forgive me if I’m wrong anyways but I’ll take a romantic matchup for Soul Eater, Bungo Stray Dogs and Fairy Tail please ^^

So small introduction..! My name is Joey, I use he/him pronouns, im transgender aromatic unlabeled and bisexual, i have autism and adhd(diagnosed), and im a cool person 😎/hj My personality: I am a ENTP and I’m extroverted but I am awkward at first when I meet someone new so it may take me some time to adjust to the new person before I emote freely, my enneagram is a 6(not sure if that’s important BUT ANYWAYS—!), i usually love to ramble about my Interests a lot or just how my day went, I also like texting a lot usually as well so I make jokes like “UwU”, “hai”, or “I’m homophobic” (Bro don’t take the homophobic part seriously 😭), and lastly I also like to make sexual jokes a lot lololol only if I’m REALLY close with someone

Appearance: I’m 5’6, I’m white skinned, I have brown (now more boyish) hair, brownish/hazel eyes, and I shave a rectangular body shape (I also gained some muscles so nkw I can squeeze ppl plus I’m more stronger xD), i also wear a shit load of styles—! Like goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, and nu goth), gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, rokku, manba, kogal and tsuyome), scenemo/emo and vkei ouji and lolita but!! i wear that stuff when I’m doing social media stuff, at home, school, malls, etc, but usually I also wear streetwear stuff like baggy pants and usually anime shirts or a regular shirt

Interests/hobbies: anime/manga, gaming, cosplaying, art(drawing, painting, pottery, digital art and more), cooking, fashion, making clothes of my own, making/listening to music(I’m a vocaloid producer hahahah—), science/history, shopping, writing, learning new languages likes Japanese and Spanish and more so on

Likes: cats, hajime hinata (danganronpa), a silent voice, albedo (genshin impact), lemon demon, felix kranken (twf), bread, musicals, sharks, christmas music/christmas in general, scp 3008 (roblox game), get a snack at 4am (roblox game), hotels, and my friends!

Dislikes: negative mentions of my voice, comparing me to people like “you remind me of ___”,hate talk about my interests or myself, drama between friends/family, loud noises(yelling, vacuuming, etc), and spiders

Thanks!

a/n: i'm so sorry if these suck. this is the first time i've written anything in like almost a year so i hope you enjoy them LOL

bungou stray dogs

I match you up with Edogawa Ranpo! You guys are two sides of the same coin which makes your relationship all the more fun and interesting! You guys would have tons of fun together either learning about new things and Ranpo loves to listen to whatever new music you make or inspect any new art you may create! Ranpo especially loves your fashion sense and is often envious of how you can figure out how to put a whole costume together. He would especially love your sexual jokes because he also loves to make lewd remarks with a smirk just to see someone flush in embarrassment. Honestly, chaotic power couple right here, the vibes are immaculate.

fairy tail

I match you up with Mirajane Strauss! Mirajane is super nurturing and extremely supportive of whatever you want to do, she’s your biggest fan! She also knows a thing or two about putting together different outfits (she’s got all these demon equip outfits that are awesome and I just love them so much) so you guys bond over your fashion sense and your interest in cosplaying. Lewd comments/jokes will make her blush ear to ear at first but after you guys get more comfortable with each other, she’ll be quick to fire some back and start a battle of who can make the dirtiest joke around ;) She also hates drama between her friends and family so that will never be an issue in your relationship, since she’ll do everything in her power to avoid any sort of drama between the two of you.

soul eater

I match you up with Crona Gorgon! You both are just the most precious little beans and need to be protected at all costs. Crona is interested in everything you do and admires your many talents; they think you are the coolest person ever. They look up to you in every way and often ask you to teach them how to do things. Right now, Crona is the most interested in the music that you make. Music makes them feel happy and warm, no matter what kind of music it is, and they think that it’s just the coolest that you can actually create a whole voice! Please be patient with Crona though, they will most likely take quite a while to warm up to you, but once they’re comfortable with you, they’re never leaving your side!

[1eos]

reading anon's ask and ur response only serves to remind me how sickening it is for society to expect women and young girls to somehow be "naturally motherly caretakers instantly capable of taking care of children," to the point where mothers are considered the "default" parent and therefore the one expected most to do the child rearing while nothing is expected of men/fathers (in fact they are expected to be bad at parenthood which is why we have the whole "idiot dad" stereotype) 😐😐 reminds me of this reddit AITA where OP got sick of having her identity reduced to being merely a mother: she kept on getting gifts related to motherhood and nothing abt her own interests while her husband got gifts related to his hobbies/interests (like no father related items at all), which shows just how much the "the woman/mother is the default parent" crap has been normalized.

yeah....the 'all women are naturally amazing caretakers' is the bane of my existence tbh. the vagina to mother pipeline is getting a BIT better but the ideals are so ingrained in society it actually drives me crazy. and i saw that aita! that made me fucking sick like other adults in her life weren't even calling her by her name just 'mama'. 😭😭😭😭 i swear the more i hear accounts from women who have kids the more i feel like i would rather die than have kids. ppl really will act like you exist for nothing but popping out kids! dark sided! but this also raises my respect for ppl who DO have kids. like wow............you're made of sterner stuff

and speaking of reddit i feel like that's the easiest way to see just how fast ppl are to shit on a woman for not wanting to take a bullet for literally any child or infant on earth. they will light women UP for not wanting to swoop in and breast feed some other man's child regardless of how weird and manipulative he is abt it. a man could literally bring his children to a strangers house and if she's a woman someone will get mad that she didn't take them in and sacrifice her whole being to raise them when she didn't want to. it's VILEEEE

and even tho my family has.......issues.......i'm thankful p much everyone has seen my lack of """"""motherly warmth""""" from birth and accepted that it's not gonna change 😭 apparently when i was a kid i begged for one of them dolls that acted like a real baby and when i got it and it started crying i immediately asked my mom to get a refund lollllllllll. but even with this bare minimum im INCREDIBLY lucky like soooooooo many girls are basically being harassed by everyone around them to be a mother and if they're not perfect at raising a child they may not have wanted they get vilified.

which is my main problem tbh and shows that most ppl don't respect children like coercing ppl who don't want kids to have them and then do a BRUNT of the child rearing will inevitably negatively affect the kids? the kids you are so desperate for? 89% of shit around children i don't understand but it's like? by forcing ppl via societal pressure to have kids there's a slim chance these kids are gonna have the upbringing they need? and they think oh suck it up even if you resent having kids they'll suffer without you but they'll also suffer.........with you....bc you resent them? children are a gift but they don't raise themselves and the fantasy that everybody w a womb who don't want kids will change their mind when they look into the baby's widdle eyes is literally just misogyny lol

[ut-girl666]

Okay, okay. So we have (basically) canon Poet!Megatron. but, hear me out here - what about Author!Megatron?? Like, writes books, not just poetry.

Personally, I think of Fantasy Genre being what he writes, and he ends up with a good couple books. And like, they’re really well written. Beautiful plot, fantastic characters, gives plenty of development to each of them, and whole arcs, usually completed before the book ends.

Even better; he specifically tries to make them LGBTQ+ friendly. He makes lots of diverse fun characters, with different identities of all kinds. Particular interesting thing he does specifically for his repulsed readers, is he actually warns when there will be smut or something close in a chapter. This is because he’s a Repulsed!AroAce. And further more, when scenes like that actually happen (not in the first two, only implied), he actively admits, no, he didn’t write them, one of his ‘editors’ did.

He also tends to write his books with lots of warnings, and usually puts a page between each chapter, specifically so readers aren’t immediately tossed into something they weren’t alright with, because he knows that people have trauma, and PTSD, because he does himself, and doesn’t want to put his readers into a bad spot, because of his writing. He’s a very friendly writer.

And now into the funnies of Author!Megs.

One day Elita drags him onto Twitter and Tumblr. He effectively does normal twitter stuff, and he talks to some fans/readers, lets them ask stuff, etc. Tumblr, he talks, interacts a little more, and reblogs a lot, he also has a few little blogs - one for reblogging things, one for just his own talking and stuff (inc when he comments on his weblogs outside of tags - those go on both.), one where he is magical author man. Readers can talk to him there, and see when he makes new content just for fun. They love it!

And when they do the asking, it depends which he’s on. Twitter - he’s serious, mature, and very adult. Tumblr - it’s like he looked at his full ass inbox, and did some drugs before answering them. He is so fun on Tumblr.

“You said [Character] does [Hobby] in the first book, and they still do in [Later book]. Did they get any better?”

Twitter Megs: It depends. Time may only tell if they did. Full answer on tumblr - [link]

Tumblr Megs:

lol they still suck ass.

Also, Elita, being an Artist on Tumblr with her own characters, world, lore, and stuff, knows him. She loves to make him things, and has read his books. She likes them. Eventually once Ariel and Orion were bondmates, and she started having to spend more time with him (Orion and Megs shared a house for like, their v. of six years, basically- and they were gonna be in-laws, gotta learn to get along with the family. kinda. at least for dinner.), they got along. She became his beta-reader for the third book, and his editor. (She suggested the smut, and wrote it. The explicit part is on her tumblr/ao3, megs didn’t let that go through, only suggestive/implied! He got really hot and bothered by it… in the negative way. He likes it, until the actual sex. Then *scream* SLAM! So it all goes on ao3.)

She also stands up for him when people steal his shit. He doesn’t really do much besides say ‘hey, please don’t copy/steal my stuff’, as he’s new to the internet. She’s been around since he was fourteen, and she used to be like that, but now she’s aged up, and she will not tolerate theft!! So she screams it from the rooftops, and alerts people “hey! They steal/copy other ppl’s content! Stay away from them! >:(.” it’s something she does for a lot of people, and Megs is included bc she knows that just like her, he hold his blorbos close and dear to his heart.

Ppl also hate him in the second book/prequel, he does the thing, and kills a character for the first time, especially one that had become so beloved!! He didn’t like doing it. He cried, a lot. He hated having to bring them back home to him. But he happily put them out into the world for ppl to make fics about them.

That being said, he doesn’t like it when people make fics where they mess with specific established stuff (sexuality, race, etc.), but otherwise, if it’s just an AU (Cafe!AU, Royalty!AU, Highschool!AU, etc.), other little things, (fluff, angst, etc.), or even something else (fix-it fic, song-fic, slice of life, how a pair may have got together, etc.) he loves them!! He loves all of that, to see people being inspired, tossing his babies into scenarios, making what-if?s about them, maybe letting them have a break with some fluff, or whatever! It’s his favorite! And he loves to scroll and see the things. So every time his kills a character, he puts a tag around their neck, and gives them back to the fan base to play with.

I’m begging you lot, think about it!! Just an idea, but what if?! Wouldn’t it be fun?

[v-r-i-s-vris-v-r-i-s]

I LOVE BAD ART

hiii im thyme (ze/zir/they/them), one of the 4 ppl w accces to this acct, and sry for spelling, im dysgraphic + actualy typing and not using speach-to-text like normal

ANYWAYS

i LOVE bad art, and i HATE when ppl get upset i say that!

i grew up w a lot of pressuer on me to be good, definetly in general, but also absolutly w art!! my mom was an artist, and i grew up VERY christian. everything i did reflected on god, and more importantly to my mom, on her.

she was so exited to have a kid who LOVED art and stuff like her, but i was never good enough. she would always tell everyone how good i was, how i was gifted by god, and how much i took after her. (she was v self centered and would majorly talk up anything that made her look good, yikes i know)

so ppl would be naturaly interested and exited to see! and then i would be forced to show them some art, which, keep in mind, was verry age appropriate and full of the generally goofy stuff i loved, and 9/10 they would be dissapointed. even if they werent my mom decided to constantly pressure me to do better.

this was really stressful obv, and i stopped drawing for the first time. when i got into middle school, i started again, this time not really ttelling my mom. i was happier, but had already had it impressed down onto me that my art had to be good to warrant existing or taking my time. i was v stressed by it, and as i slowly started to get more comfortable i was imedietly bombarded with competition.

i struggled to get better in the ways that seemed easy for anyone else, PDA kicked in as soon as i felt something NEEDED to be done, and i was compaird to everyone my age and younger and told how much better theye were.

i never wanted to make it a competition, i just wanted to have fun. i wanted to do something hands on that could express me better than my words ever could (undiagnosed autism at the time made me feel verry weird and thuroughly broken, and explaining that wo imedietly getting invalidating and patronizing answers simply did not happen)

i stoped drawing again. i changed schools and had a better art teacher. she wasnt a dick bout my art, but definetly acted overly suportev(possibly im anxiose and projecting past art trauma onto her lmao and she was just being normal, she was cool af tho). i starded drawing more, on and offf, and got REALLY depressed and burnt out. one of the ways it manifested was being unable to be creative.

but things did get better!!! got an autism diagnosis and educated myself more on my dysgraphia diagnosis(got in elementry school), came out, made freinds who brought me to queer music and caberet shows(tysm phoenix), and was able to move out!

as im now on my own, my art drive has rissen signifigantly, especily as im surounded by other art enjoying weirdos(complementary). but i still hate when someone says that my art is good or bad. constructive advice and support is always valued, but there are so many mediums and people and styles, how on earth do we judge that?? having to be good enough for everyone to warent my own existance and hobbies almost killed me, and sucked all of the joy out of my life.

ive seen people who got so happy to doodle, only to stop forever when someone makes a remark on skill with their age. ive seen family stop bc someone joked abt their stick figures or car drawings, because even if the joker didnt mean it outside of a goofy remark, the joke was meanspirited and ment to put the artist down. I HATE THIS??!?!

WHO DECIDES WHATS GOOD ENOUGH TO EXIST??? capitilism? christianity? the example of two dead ppl from history???

obviosly i dont fuck w that.

art is something made to express something, how are you going to take such a broad catagory and shove it into your biased and sad binary?

so i proudly call my art bad. as an ongoing rebelion against everyone who thought and thinks that something has to fit their binary of goodto exist. i say bd to help myself unlearn the shitty things that were pushed onto me, and as a way of saying i dont have to be anyone's good to warent my own joy.

some ppl will cut in here, theyll tell me not to talk badly about myself (im not). theyl say even if i dont mean it bad, my brain will internalize it as a negative(i dont think that applies here?) or theyll spew some capitlistic bs (HUH, GUESS HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT.)

no hate to others reclaiming their art and love for it in different ways,this is just how it works for me. in in my art vocabulary, bad means not locking itself into the harsh expectations of good, and i find that incredibly freeing :)

[landofspaceandrainbows]

First Draft / Notes 

Twelve Shattered Shards of Light: The Hemospectrum 

.... And Panopticons, Light and Void

- When you pass light through a prism you get it broken into a rainbow of colors

- Karkat wearing gray has big “no pronouns in bio” energy, which in his case is badass as heck. aka “am i a girl on the interwebs? wouldn’t you like to know!”

- Like, from wearing their symbols to typing in their hemo color, troll society is set up on the trolls constantly stating their blood status.

- Which tbh is kind of necessary to help the empire run, like in the sense of how do you even begin to treat trolls differently in the absence of this info?

- Which ties into the idea of the Panopticon, which if you have any familiarity with sociology or lgbtQ stuff is already familiar to you so i won’t go over it in detail AGAIN.

- ( No, i should make you listen to the troll romance section back to back to back / joking)

- But like a lot relies on being able to see and “correct” people, in terms of how prisons are designed, before prisons were a thing criminals were sometimes branded, and the french penal system (made famous in les mis) gave ppl different color clothes to make sure people saw the convicts as a different sort of people from them, it was called “social death”.

- Anyway, light carries information, and Light * is * information and knowlege.

- But what happens when you can’t see? when knowlege is lost or not passed through?

- A thing about Equius is he values, or thinks he values, the hemospectrum above all else.  but when he reaches out to touch it it just seems to fall apart on him.

- And he can “see” or “unsee” different things that don’t add up

- Despite what he should “see” and “know” from gamzee’s sign, he can see a whole other set of information, as if from another sense.  he can sense someone who maybe shouldn’t be obeyed, who maybe doesn’t want to be obeyed.  and who has very low class hobbies.  Likewise in aradia he can see someone worthy of respect and leadership.  despite what he thinks his eyes “should” be telling him.

- Also, the specific circumstances are tied up in what are potentially really bad motivations and a lot of really bad stereotypes, but he does, with aradia, take someone from the rust to the blue caste.  seriously, after she has her new robo body, she even has blue blood and there’s literally no way anyone could tell and make it stick that she was born rust.

- And i really prefer to minimize the physical differences between blood castes as a personal preference, but the way hussie has it written, there are small but significant physical differences between castes.

-` And once the social order changes from being So Godsdamn Awful that issues of being a “class traitor” are bigger than most other things. (and that change will happen).  That kind of physical difference plus social significance is he exact fucking sort of thing that makes cross category movement and identification happen.  There’s probably going to be people that really like the water, and they say “oh, zie’s basically a sea dweller but zie just wasn’t born with the gills and has green blood” 

- And so you get this inner battle where you have this one troll who talks about the hemospectrum constantly, and yet also is maybe the first to look at a rust girl and say “yes she can wear a sign in blue”

`- And who knows he might not be happy untill he merges with a sweaty guy who loves horses  types in red.

-  ( And also until he can ( no matter what his color is atm ) kneel in front of an olive friend and ask for forgiveness. )

- ( seriously, spectra are used in chemistry, astronomy, and physics to tell what something’s made of, and that’s cool and interesting as hell.  )

- ( but what if what it’s saying is wrong or sucks? )

( the local hero of heart might be picking something up, bro )

[not-poignant]

Hey Pia hope you’re doing well

I was wondering, is the thing where Arden picks up a bunch of random hobbies and commitments a part of his ADHD or does it have like a name?

I’m a highschool student and I get told by all my friends and teachers that I have overcommitment issues and part of it’s just for uni and whatever ofc but it’s also that I want to do ALL THESE THINGS

Like I’m in 4 different science competition teams, the school debating team, school orchestra, scholarship classes, editor of my school newsletter, I lead the school amnesty and unicef clubs plus the IB program and being in the national maths Olympiad team lol and I don’t want to let any of these go but it’s so stressful and I’m so tired and ppl say I have to say no to stuff which is also stressful!

Also, doing more is always portrayed as such a great thing and I feel rlly guilty letting stuff go? So I’m just reaching out because you portrayed it in such a refreshing way and I was really curious!

Firstly, massive respect for your ability to fit this ask into the Tumblr ask limits. Seriously :D

Okay secondly, Arden’s habit of picking up a bunch of random hobbies / commitments is part of his ADHD. People with ADHD have this to different degrees, and my beta in particular relates really hard to this habit of Arden’s.

But actually, one of the reasons I put this in is because this is a very bad habit of mine - which is overcommitting, and overworking. And not wanting to let anything go.

People teach you a lot of skills in your life on how to pick things up, but almost no one teaches you what to do when you have many hobbies you love, and they’re hurting you because you’re working too hard and don’t have time for your loved ones (or to even really have loved ones) as an example. And it absolutely is a crucial skill to learn for people who are dealing with this, though capitalists don’t want you to learn it.

In the media what I see is most folks having no hobbies and someone being ‘oh you have to learn some.’ I liked Arden as a contrast to that ‘no, that’s too many things, put some back.’ Where Arden’s ADHD manifests - though it’s much more controlled than it used to be - is that he desires to spend a lot of money on the thing as soon as he gets into it (because he only wants the best of the best - which wasn’t great when he wasn’t earning much money), and that he starts really hooking into it in an obsessive kind of way. Spending a night making bows for your dog is one thing. Then wanting to spend $500 and start an Etsy store small business is like...from one day of work, not great.

A lot of Arden’s life has involved choosing to let go of things he’s loved doing, for his own sanity. This is something I’ve had to do as well and I fucking hate it, and these are the techniques I’ve developed for myself (and my still frankly overcommitted ass, who has people saying ‘when are you going to do LESS’ all the time to my face).

* Remind yourself that dropping some things now doesn’t mean you’re dropping them forever. It doesn’t have to be permanent. Sometimes it’s good to put a time limit on something. ‘I’m going to drop this for four weeks / four months and put a note/reminder in my phone about it right now.’ Chances are high you are not going to be as interested in that thing in four weeks/four months. (Chances are sadly also high you may have replaced it with something else). Like, there will be science groups you can join for the rest of your life. And debate groups. And newsletters.

(That being said, none of those things count towards our grades in Australia? So I don’t know how much these things are counting towards your grades in general and I’m not going to like, touch that side of things - however overcommitment is a super fast way to do a lot of things not that well, or to suddenly get so sick you can’t do any of the things and then feel terrible while you’re sick, more on that later!).

* Time caps on certain hobbies and activities and commitments. This is to actually shoot my habit of hyperfocusing in the foot. I don’t have time to play piano for four hours, but I’m allowed to play it for ten minutes a day (sometimes more but not often). And ten minutes a day adds up over time. I literally sit down and put the timer on my phone. If say there’s something that meets up twice a week but some people only go once, be one of those people!

* Rate the things based on how they contribute to your a) career and b) quality of life and c) happiness. Anything that rates lower on the list compared to the others (that isn’t like, literal money-making work or literal classes) needs to be dropped.

* Dropping things is just actually one of the hardest parts and there’s no real trick to making this easier. I just remind myself: ‘Just because I can do this thing, and do this thing well, doesn’t mean it’s good or healthy for me to do this thing. I need to spend time with people I care about, and I need rest, and those things matter more even if they feel less like ‘accomplishments.’ I want to care for myself through my hobbies, not punish myself.’ That goes some way in keeping perspective, but look, ngl, it sucks to drop commitments if you have an accomplishment/achievement/job satisfaction addiction. It just sucks.

* Accept that you are going to feel guilty, and that guilt is just an emotion, and it doesn’t mean you’ve done something bad. Look sometimes guilt gets it wrong! Sometimes you feel crushingly guilty just for breaking a bad habit, it’s not useful, you just have to kind of be like ‘huh I’m feeling a lot of guilt for trying to look after myself, that’s really interesting, I guess I can understand that but I’m also going to try and praise myself for doing a great job. Just because this isn’t an obvious kind of achievement, I know I achieved something really big and difficult today.’

* Oh yeah, use achievement and ‘job’ type language for doing things that involve successfully taking care of yourself and your energy levels. Just...sometimes you have to ‘if you can’t beat them join them’ - chances are you’ve never been as kind to yourself or proud of yourself for resting and taking it easy and seeing friends, than you are for taking on too many commitments. So...challenge yourself to be kind to yourself and proud of yourself for resting and taking it easy and seeing friends and committing to less. Trust me, you are never going to forget how to overcommit, and you are never going to become lazy or lax because you dropped a few of the (billion) things that you’re committed to. You can afford to praise yourself for this! And generously!

* Seriously, seriously consider seeing doctors or psychologists about this. Despite a TON of PTSD, I actually see my therapist most for working too hard and overcommitting. We spend a lot of time talking about why I might not be the worst person in the world for taking a break. Take it seriously. Your list alone made me feel like I was about to have a panic attack, lmao, your friends and teachers are right, you have overcomittment issues.

* Workaholicism and work addiction is real. There is a growing amount of information about how to deal with it and it’s worth googling.

***

Er anyway that’s what I do. It doesn’t always work. I have a lot of rules in place and I abandon half of them about halfway through the year and then s u f f e r. And have been doing that for over 25 years and I’m going to say bluntly now - it’s why I’m as sick as I am, and some of that sickness is irreversible. If nothing else, if you want to stay as active as you are now, I do not recommend that anyone push themselves so hard that they can no longer even do things that they enjoy on a regular basis, because they’re too physically debilitated to manage it, because they pushed their bodies too hard during the university years and just after. Because that is 100% why I became so sick in the first place.

And even extremely healthy people who have no history of chronic illness often develop something, in conjunction with years and years of working too hard or overcommitting. I’ve seen it happen to far too many of my friends, and you might feel like ‘just another six months’ or ‘just another three years’ but you’d be surprised how quickly you can go from ‘I’m doing it I’m doing it’ to ‘I keep getting migraines all the time doctor how do I fix this so I can go back to working as hard as I was before’ and your doctor being like ‘...yeah this isn’t curable. I’m going to give you some meds, that all come with horrible side effects, and you simply can’t do what you were doing before.’ Game over.

Trust me, that shit catches up with your body always. It might not be now, and I hope frankly it’s never, but overcommitment and workaholicism are the two fastest ways I know to chronic illness and once you get there, you can’t work your way out of it again.

Though god knows I have tried.

[eremiie]

okay and for the matchup!!! im gonna try and make this as descriptive as possible but if u want more info pls lmk :)) also it would be cool if it was a guy and it would be REALLY cool if it wasn’t zeke (him and i just don’t click idk i hope that doesn’t mess u up:()

for physical i use she/her pronouns, i’m a about 5’6 and a little on the thicker/curvier side! idk if this is tmi or not but i’m pretty hefty in terms of 🍒 but i got NOTHING for 🍑 :(( breaks my heart aNYWAY i have long light brown hair and my two front pieces are dyed blonde/silver ish, i have blue eyes and wear glasses!! in terms of makeup i tend to do more natural stuff like basic foundation and mascara and that stuff but that’s mostly bc i suck at everything else 😭

my zodiac sign is sagittarius (november sag if that helps) and i’m an enfp!! i tend to be a little shy when i first meet people but once i warm up it’s hard to make me shut up lmao i loooooooove meeting new people and getting to know them and ngl i do tend to over share a little bit so that can be a little overwhelming but i’m pretty good at reading ppl so i know when it’s too much you know ?? i also think i’m one of the funniest ppl i know LMAO i’m always laughing at my own jokes and i love to make other ppl laugh it makes me so happy!! in terms of my type of humor it’s pretty sarcastic but i will literally laugh at anything (except things that are messed up i’m not down for DARK humor). also i’m like hella nice tbh i’m probably overly nice to a lot of ppl BUT i also stand up for myself when need be and i’m not afraid to be honest and blunt!

as for bad personality traits i can definitely be a little jealous and i tend to overthink things a lot. i am NOT a morning person if i wake up any earlier before like 10am i’m usually pretty cranky for the rest of the day which is pretty annoying lmao. i’m pretty forgetful so if someone tells me to do something they usually have to do it a few more times before it hits me. also i’m the absolute worst at math and i was pretty careless in school :/ i didn’t like get into trouble or anything but i definitely slacked off in terms of grades and caring about things like that.

i’m p sure my love languages are quality time and physical touch bc i’m a HUUUUGE sucker for hugs and hand holding and stuff like that 🥺 i also really think 1 on 1 time with a s/o is important but i for sure think it’s good to have time apart or time with like a group of friends too!!

for hobbies i love to play video games, hang out with friends, listen to music, watch movies and tv and write!! i spend way too much time playing games like minecraft and legend of zelda and i can pretty much listen to anything except for country lol i love comedy and horror movies and tbh i’m kinda a sucker for romance movies 😳 i go to target like every day and just kinda walk around and before covid i loved going out to eat with friends and going to the arcade!!! i’m for sure more of a city person than a country girl and i love spending time downtown just walking around or going to baseball games or whatever!!

for future goals tbh i’m not really sure yet ?? i’m interested in maybe being a therapist or a teacher when i’m older but like i said i don’t have any like set goals career wise. i do want to get married but i don’t really want kids unless i maybe adopt ?? (fun fact i’m TERRIFIED of pregnancy for some reason lmao is that weird). i would L O V E to travel the world someday and see all of the different cultures and places i think that would be so unbelievably fun :))

turn ons include bondage, degradation, wax, dirty talk, and idk if this has a name but having to be quiet 😳😳😳 tbh pretty much everything except for feet, blood, p!ss, and pet (those are the turn offs) but idk besides those id probably be willing to try anything at least once

i hope this wasn’t too long or not descriptive enough!!! again if u need more info pls don’t hesitate to message me and ask i’m an open book :))) thank u sm for doing this muah ur an angel <33333

i match you up with...

connie springer.

i match you up because...

connie could care less how shy you were at first because he definitely opened you up, but not by his own will, you just felt so comfortable around him to open up in the first place. he just listens to what you have to say, it might seem like he doesn’t care but he’s really listening. you think you’re real funny? when you’re with connie you guys are both hilarious together and crack up at the stupidest stuff but it’s literally so funny because it’s with him. he appreciates that you can stand up for yourself and you’re straight forward so he doesn’t really have to jump in when you’re getting in it with other people— not that he won’t if you ask, he just isn’t a fan of drama if he isn’t watching it. connie isn’t great at reassuring you when you get jealous and start overthinking but i think there aren’t many moments when you do with him because you guys are always spending immense quality time together that is such a vibe it leaves no room for any thinking. connie doesn’t wake up early and neither do you so you don’t have to worry about waking up early when you live with him. you and connie are forgetful but you’re forgetful together— that’s not really a positive but it’s funny. you guys also both slack off in school work, which you probably both tried to fix but it didn’t work out. he enjoys that your love language is quality time becayse like i said, y’all spend a lot of it together. he doesn’t mind your affectionate but don’t expect much back in return. 

you guys play video games together all the time, in the same house but different rooms, or sitting on the floor in front of the couch together

both of you once slept in together until 3pm and decided it was too late to even start your day, so got up and then went back to bed together

you and connie constantly go places together, and always try to go new places at that as well

you guys go out to eat at fast food chains really late at night 

both of you tried to study together but y’all literally laughed like the whole entire time and got no progress done

you like watching movies with him but he always falls asleep like 15 minutes in so you take pictures of him sleeping

you guys go to walmart & target all the time to literally just look around

your runner up was eren, hope you enjoyed your matchup!

[knarme-stray]

Reasons why anyone makes theory content abt a piece of media they enjoy

=/=

pretending to know what is canon, or even caring if their theory would ever be canon or not

It's called a theory bcs... it's not fact? It's not even stating facts, it's about trying to conclude things based on the facts available? Because people are curious and love little thought challenges like that? This is just normal stuff people like to do bcs it's fun...

Why I make it?

Because it helps me put myself in the shoes of these characters, make sense of their lives etc. so that I can have nice headcanons and ideas about how I'd flesh them out in a fic.

I love fics that show amazing character analysis and put it into good use to create situations that feel really immersive to the character etc.

While I might be too lazy to write fics, I like to ponder ideas for them for fun. Also it helps me flesh out my ship dynamics.

And with characters like Sephiroth whose life is very "alien" to most people alive, I really wanna immerse myself into what it might feel like to experience life as he does.

That's why I write my theories with a heavy focus on psychology and character dynamics.

That's how I enjoy especially the FF7 fandom, where I'm mostly interested in the "distant" characters whose minds we don't canonically get to look into the way we do with, like, Cloud. Characters like Sephiroth, Angeal and Genesis who seem to have really fun dynamics but whose lives we still know veeeeery little about in canon, are so fun to theorize about because I'm just dying to see more of them!

Also, before judging people for enjoying the fandom the way I do, kindly consider your potential ableism towards neurodivergent people like me who might actually require a little more 'theory' to understand how people feel in general.

I've never put anyone down for how they enjoy this fandom and I'm really hurt to see cruel remarks + inaccurate claims towards people who either make or enjoy theory content here. It seriously jabs me into the chest and makes me feel horrible and ashamed to... Like things?

And if you think people like/make theory content just to act like some smug smart-ass-wannabes towards others, I honestly think that kind of prejudice is entirely your own problem and not ours.

Imagine... It's possible to like something bcs we just have fun with it. Nobody gives a fuck about looking smart, unless they're greasy neckbeardos who don't understand fun. I'm sorry if you've met people like that in the internet.

I've never, ever understood why so many people's first instinct is to yell "YOU CAN'T SAY WHAT IS CANON!!!" or "UHH WELL NOBODY MAY KNOW THOSE THINGS" etc. when someone just.. Makes... A theory. This legit happened to me when I made a Salad Fingers episode theory in the David Firth Discord server. I asked ppl if anyone has had similiar or different ideas, but mostly got these buffoons yelling obvious things at me.

I think... I called it a theory. I never said "hey I think I know what the creator was thinking!"

Also...

I've seen people even accusing theory-enjoyers of sucking the fun out of a fandom. The irony is huge, because usually making people feel horrible for their interests/hobbies that are hurting nobody, tends to suck the fun out of a fandom. Pls self-reflect a little before coming up with those takes.

[sqwood-tentl]

15 question game

@srirachafilledbees ty i love these

nickname: anoosoo, a knee sa, patrick

zodiac: aquarious 

height: gnome (4′11)

last thing I googled: "parse int char java”  for comp sci hw 

song stuck in my head: Kocci Muite Baby - Ryo/ Supercell/ Miku

number of followers: 285? fairly certain 98% of them are bots lol

hours of sleep: idrg what this is asking. on avg i probably sleep abt 6 hrs. But ive noticed if i dont have an alarm i will sleep p much until the clock is the same number lol. example: when i go to bed at 2 am i wake up at 2 pm, if i go to bed at 4 am ill probably wake up abt 3:30pm. and then i get tired all day it sucks >:0

lucky number: 2 bc my birthday is 2/2/2002 

favorite song: too many/changes too often. Rn its probably Kocci Muite Baby or Stuff That I Like - Bomb the Music Industry  

favorite instrument: i play flute so ofc that is my #1 (for rn). But i also love the sound of violin and other bowed strings. And i rlly like deeeeep sounding things where u can almost feel it, so also bass and cello. And drums are in a category of their own. listening to drums isnt even like listening to music its an experience. i wanna learn how to play drums.

dream job:  i have many interests, and hobbies, and interests i want to turn into hobbies but am too broke for. I feel like if i became skilled enough in any one of them to make a living from it, while also being able to maintain a good work-life-balance, id be cool w that. The bar is set so low but somehow still seems impossible. fuck capitalism.

aesthetic:   i was very into the ocean/nautical aesthetic until abt 2015, then i was SUPER into forest/cottage in the woods aesthetic (and still am), i guess today would fall under “cottage core” but i have some arguments about that. [I could probably write an entire essay on this but this is the extremely cut down version: From what i perceive from the main apps i use, instagram, youtube and tiktok, it seems like there was a huge rise in popularity in cottage core aesthetic starting about Dec 2019. My main problem is, my own definition of what cottage core matched with what i saw online up until this big boom of cottagecore, and now it seems like what i think is *not* cottagecore is being called cottage core. But with something as conceptual and subjective as an aesthetic, it is really defined person to person, based on everyones own opinions and experiences and way of categorizing things. Plus language is defined by its speakers, so technically, the general definition of cottage core will always be whatever the majority of people define it as, at the time of definition. What i think happened is, when it got really popular, the range of what “fits” into cottage core widened alot, so while my aesthetic still falls under cottage core, it may fit better in a subcategory (a recent necessity) or entirely differently named aesthetic. Either that, or it was never cottagecore in the first place. again this is based on the content i see from the couple apps i primarily use, which is really only a sliver of all the cottagecore content there is]. My other aesthetic is dirty feral subway rat eating pizza under an incoming train and chainlink fence at 5pm in october No i will not elaborate.

favorite author: i cannot remember the last time i read a book that didnt eventually cause me too much stress to remember anything positive about it or the author

favorite animal noise: my husky when he go OOWWWWRRROOOOOOOO

random: I have synesthesia and alot of ppl with synesthesia say its helpful but i think mine hurts more than it helps lol. also, unrelated, i used to want to be a sniper. 

(idk who to tag. anyone can do it but if u do, tag me in it i like reading these :)

[unproduciblesmackdown]

comet, moon, pluto, aquila, protostar

Thank You vm

Comet- What are you currently frustrated about?

lmaooo oh you know at any given time i’m weaving this rich tapestry of continual frustrations lol.....i’d say i’m in an Upswing Period of [simmering frustration levels closer to the surface] lately too lol like earlier in the week i pushed through a day or two there more casually but then it was like ah jeez here comes the malaise. more specifically today, even just before sitting down to answer this, i emerged from the bathroom to find there was a “dog has pooped inside despite having been outside within the last 10 min” shituation, which was wonderful.....annoyed from Waking by “smh at not being able to adjust my nocturnality, still frustrated about the near success of last friday being thwarted by the dead of night hammering debacle,” & regular Antagonizing Audio issues, aka being stressed by both the [loud, alarming] type sound & the [gross textural misophonia hell] type.....earlier i was like “where is the dish sponge” (still don’t know) & went to get a new, packaged one which had been in a drawer, but that one was gone too, good that there’s no pressing need to wash dishes rn i guess.....still struggling with the “well i guess i’m trying to put myself out there Socially” attempt to find relevant public discords, being generally overwhelmed as actually talking to randos in a group is A Lot & in theory it’s like well you meet someone Specific you’d enjoy talking to & branch off from there but unfortunately you can’t just skip to that step, also i do not genuinely Expect to get to that step either way, also i am not easily finding servers in the 1st place b/c it’s like, well i talk about Interests but what am i interested in? who knows. don’t do art “seriously” enough to rly wanna discuss it much, thought abt Language Learning but one i found wants you to have a verified account lmao like, no thanks. in theory i enjoy Socializing some but in practice it is sure a trial & i have not said anything to anyone anywhere yet, just a “well, not sure what else i could do here situation,” in theory take up an In Person hobby / group to make it all easier but that’s not happening. which, i was also Frustrated remembering oh right i spent a year as measured by my personal age in 1 location, both Pandemic & other [society] problems, & speaking of Interests & Hobbies not having them, i was also >:| over something having kicked in my Math Sensibilities (aka that i like math) & wondering like, would i have enjoyed getting more into math / some particular application, who knows, same but also even more so re: other things i get the sense i’m quite Into, like learning languages & ~performing arts~, which, i at least took math / math related classes into college level courses, which is not true for those other things (took a Language Class: never, took a theatre / drama class: for 1/4 of the schoolyear in 7th grade, & prior to that, just did a scene or two of a play in english class 4th grade, & the approx decade extracurricular of ballet, which is related but of course a different thing. anyhow, annoyed that i Simply Do Not Know & hardly see opportunities to find out on the horizon, although who knows.....which is related to being frustrated about [Society] some more like, thinking about “boy how different would it be if people were guaranteed the right to Essentials For Life like housing, food, medical care, both electricity & the internet Now A Days...” like, agonizing What If there, it is all so unnecessary that It Is Like This......just now someone made an unnecessary Post lmfao thank you xkit.......oh right, i was Frustrated, with an emphasis In Aro / Ace, about Media & Life, what else is new & then, you know, musings on The Theoretical Future & One’s Personal Past that would become even more of a like, audioscape: therapy session topic, these are frustrating things. and all of this answer has been stuff i remember getting Frustrated about in the past 24 hours. Also!!! that last night i was like, i want to play scrabble, so i looked up an online game but the Computer settings are a nightmare like, as far as i could tell the Difficulty settings were mostly attuned to Average Word Length but it was like, yeah you’re playing against this opponent given this effective total familiarity with the most obscure / archaic shit in the scrabble dictionary, not even simply the like, q words / two letter words ppl might happen to know specifically for the purposes of scrabble. there was also no “new game” button?? just had to refresh the page? smh. oh lmfao! also! you Know i was frustrated thinking about Billions, the series / interest that antagonizes you, jokes on you when you hone in on the Quant where it’s like, is he just meant to be the guy who sucks, plus he’s got depression....suppose they do at least handle him w/some sympathy / nonzero Care for this Char acter, but smh at sighing about [bracing yourself for anything promising (cough riawin) to spiral into disaster one way or another, whether it turns into a joke or plot device or just something introduced / built up / demolished for ambient drama/conflict].....what else is new. the periodic cycles of Billions Thoughts lol. was just frustrated at a video’s Editing Cadence basically lmfao. i also find it grating when the word “the jab” is used in tweets re: vaccination, which i just saw, presumably in the same sort of way where i automatically dislike the phrase To Be Fair or referring to food/eating with “fill / filling” or any variants lmfao, or earnest use of the description “hearty”......some words i hate the sound of no matter what, some i hate to hear used in a particular phrase / context......need to simply stop doing things in the middle of answering this b/c it will inevitably involve Frustrations lmfaooo. oh also i was annoyed to wake up to a clear sky. where’s that overcast atmosphere

Moon- Are you currently reading any books? If so, what book(s)?

i am not, but i’ve been considering it! just inconvenient b/c a) i gotta like, choose what book/s to read, & b) i have to read via laptop, which is kind of a pain, & c) like with everything, i always tend to basically read stuff all at once, but i’m also a slow reader lmao, so it’s like, okay, i’m probably basically devoting days on end to Reading Through whatever.....

Pluto- If you could meet anyone, alive or dead, who would you meet?

another classic Fascinating Answer of “i dunno” lol, i’ve never really had a go to answer for this or anything that’s particularly leapt out.....plus re: how i tend to feel nervous with on the spot socializing, the concept of like “if you could have dinner with someone” is too much lmfao like, a waste of time, i’d simply Be Nervous my way completely through it. the only way i could think of things is like, here i go giving someone an interview, i guess, and whomst tf would i feel Prepared to talk to lmfao. relevant to interests it’s like well of course you could ask w. roland things the in depth secret jared questions, or Any questions about quant n billions, but then it’s also like, well, there’s the questions I already have an answer for lol & either you have the same answer or i have a mini monologue, not like i don’t speak in mini monologues all the time if i have something to say at all, and my Questions go like that too lmfao, a disaster already trying to ask people about pertinent Information......never able to think of things re: people who have died, i suppose there’s fun answers re: like, getting lost / unknown Historical Info......when it comes to meeting people i don’t really consider it much in advance b/c i am nervous about everything & aware that any interacting is a Challenge lmfao. whenever these things actually happen, it’s hardly always a disaster, but i’m just improvising in the end. also, i could meet people i actually know but have never met, i.e. you, who i talk to but we are Virtual & Pandemic’d & etc & so on. but i suppose that’s kind of a given lol

Aquila- Do you prefer to read books or watch movies?

i think movies are less Involved for me, like, even if it takes me 3x their runtime (or longer) to watch any videos thanks to getting distracted & stuff, still quicker than i read a book, & unless i’m watching something for the first time and/or really wanting to properly pay attention, i can do other things while putting a movie on, whereas if i’m reading that’s the One Thing i can be doing. but overall i’m like “media, what media” whichever format lol like. haven’t consumed things, don’t often think of specific works i want/plan to consume, don’t often get around to it, etc. classique.....

Protostar- Give a random fact about yourself.

speaking of classic, me struggling to recall 101 info about myself or answer not that out there Questions, but when it’s like “alright hater what are you disgruntled about now” it’s like, Deep Inhale lmfao, but [are you okay? Is Anyone].jpeg on that one as well, we are out here......uh i’m sure i’ve said it before but i’m around 5′11″? maybe 6 ft tall but that might be overdoing it. sort of Average Tall but i am always literally looking down on people lmao.....and bumping my head into a low hanging light fixture around here.....