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thebestofoneshots · 8 months

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Gilded Constellations | (wolfstar x reader)

Series Masterlist | Previous episode

Pairing: Wolfstar x Reader Word Count: 12 K Warnings: Graphic descriptions of violence. (Reader discretion is advised). Prompt: It's game time. This IS a wolfstar x reader fic, but it's incredibly slow burn. They won't start all dating each other until we're very deep into the story, but I promise the long wait will be worth it. Proofread by sweethearts: @aremuslupinsimp & @profoundpidgeon

Chapter 30: Bridge Over Troubled Water

You stayed with the boys until Peter and James arrived, and since it was already past curfew, but mostly because he wanted to, he offered to take you to your room using James’ cloak. You were both already outside your door when he stopped you and pulled you in for a short kiss.

“Starshine, I might not see you tomorrow…”

“However will I survive?” you chimed in.

He rolled his eyes, a very small smile playing on his lips before he focused again “That’s not– tomorrow’s the game–”

“Yeah, I’m very aware.”

“And I won’t be there.” You nodded, holding your tongue instead of interrupting him again, “You will be the seeker.”

“Sirius, What’s your–”

“Just promise you won’t do anything stupid.”

You gave him a look, and then smiled, reciting a line from a comic you’d read with him a couple of weeks ago “How could I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.”

He deadpanned, “I’m serious.” Again, you had to hold your tongue before saying something that would probably frazzle him a bit more, “Take care of yourself, you’re more important to me than winning the game.”

You smiled at that. It was a game against Slytherin. You’d be seeking against Regulus. Those words meant a lot more than they let on. You looked at him, and nodded “I won’t do anything stupid.”

“No using yourself as a shield for a bludger?”

“Nope,” you confirmed with a nod.

“Stay the hell away from Crouch.”

“You don’t even have to tell me for me to do that.”

“And don’t trust Minho, I know you’re friends but he’s as quidditch crazy as James, he won’t go easy on you just because you’re friends.”

“It’d be a boring game if he did,” you said with a pout. Sirius shook his head in disbelief before pulling you into a hug.

“Not gonna lie, I’m kind of glad you’re playing seeker instead of guardian, with your shoulder and everything…”

“Shoulder’s fine,” you said with a shrug, leaning onto him. He was squeezing you tightly, and you rather enjoyed it. “But I’ll get hurt more often if you keep coddling me so much.”

“How about you don’t get hurt ever again and I promise to continue coddling you regardless?” He hummed into your hair, his tone laced with humour.

“I suppose we could reach to an agreement,” you replied with a smile, as you took in the scent of his soft shirt, and then pulled back to look at him, “Don’t pick up fights with Evan while you’re in detention with Slughorn,” you added in a warning tone.

He gave you a look as if to say that it was impossible but you reached up and placed your hand near the bottom of his lip, where a small cut was healing, he winced as you brushed your hand over it “I thought as much,” you told him earnestly as you let your hand fall to the side of his cheek, Godric, he’s so unfairly pretty, you thought.

He stared back at you, and you must have stayed like that for a while, if anyone saw you, they’d assume you were two idiots in love, which was pretty accurate in and of itself, thankfully the cloak was still covering the two of you, letting you bask in each other’s gazes without anyone bursting your bubble, until Sirius did, remembering it was late. “All right, off you go, you have to wake up early tomorrow, eat a full meal and get ready for the game.”

“Sure thing Prongs,” you teased, you would have said mom, but being honest, James was a lot more concerned about the games and your eating habits than either of your moms ever were, especially Walburga, at least your mom tried, even if you didn’t agree with the choices she had made in order to please your father.

He huffed a laugh, “I’ll tell Rem to watch over you.”

“I don’t need a nanny.”

“He’ll watch over you anyway,” he added, which was true in two ways, one: he’d tell Remus regardless of your objections, and two: he was pretty sure Remus would watch over you even if he didn’t directly ask him to do it.

You hummed in response and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek before sliding into your room. Lily was awake for some reason, she had a book in her hands and was using the light of her wand to read. You narrowed your eyes at her and decided to go straight into her bed, sitting beside her.

“Where were you all day today?” She asked in a whisper, you took your wand out of the pyjama pants the boys had given you and cast a silencing spell over the two of you. “The school was chaos, Nox and Comet came over looking for you at lunch, we had to tell them we hadn’t seen you since breakfast. And then it was my date with James, I wanted to ask you if I looked nice but nobody knew where you were, it was like you vanished.”

“You always look nice,” you said, addressing one of their first statements. “James is head over heels for you–”

She frowned, looking over your body. “Hold up! What are you wearing?” she asked, placing her hand on the flannel pants you had on, pants she was sure she had seen either on Sirius or Remus (perhaps both), and then turned to the shirt, a little too big for you. A shirt she definitely had seen on Sirius. You didn’t change back into your uniform since you weren’t expecting anyone to be awake. “Isn’t this Sirius’… Oh my God! You were with Sirius,” she said with a gasp, covering her own mouth since she had been much louder this time around, “How was it?”

“Ah that… It’s not what you think!” You managed to mumble, “I was working on my project with Rem and then I accidentally spilt coffee all over myself, he borrowed this,” you explained, making it all up on the spot, feeling rather satisfied at how convincing you’d sounded. “Sirius came over later and we all just chilled together for a bit, Remus was reading to us and I just kinda lost track of time.”

She quirked an eyebrow as if analysing what you’d said, Lily was clever, that’s why you had added a truth after the lie, perhaps that way she wouldn’t suspect too much "Does that mean you haven’t…?"

You shook your head. "We’ve… kissed a lot, but no." You then turned to her, narrowing your eyes. "Lily Evans, what makes you so curious?"

She turned red, pulling a strand of shiny red hair behind her ear. "I kissed James today."

You looked at her shocked, James had told you and the boys that the date had gone well, he hadn’t elaborated further. It should have probably made you wonder why he rushed into his bathroom, but you were way too comfortable laying in between Sirius and Remus as he read an action-packed scene that you didn’t pay too much attention to it. In fact, you weren’t sure you’d be able to pay attention to much anything other than Remus’ calming voice, let alone with Sirius, who had at some point taken a hold of your hand and fidgeted with your fingers as the other boy narrated.

"You know you have to tell me everything about it, don’t you?"

She nodded. "That’s why I stayed awake."

And she told you everything, from how James had picked a few wildflowers, which you recognised as Remus’ idea, to how he’d taken her on a walk near the lakes. How he’d somehow gotten his hands on the muggle coffee candies she adores so much -which you knew had been thanks to Sirius’ cousin Andromeda- and he’d placed them on a small picnic basket filled with her favourite food from the great hall (those had been courtesy of Pebblier and Nimbletwist, you had been the one to ask them for it), how he’d taken some paints and parchment and proposed to paint each other. That had been his own idea, at least the making portraits of each other part.

She took out her journal and pulled out the parchment, she had neatly added it to one of the pages with tape. James might be good at a lot of things, but he wasn’t a Michelangelo, perhaps a Picasso? You could certainly say Lily’s portrait was an abstract piece. But she seemed absolutely delighted by it. And her happiness was contagious.

At some point, you had both laid on their bed as he continued telling you all the things they’d done. How he’d behaved like a total gentleman, but kept his very distinctive James Potter charm. She wondered how she had been so blind and not seen that side of him before. You’d been tempted to tell her she was a goner, but held your tongue. You told her a bit about the book you’d been reading with the boys, and she told you that she heard about it. That there was a movie, or maybe they were still making it, she wasn’t too sure. Hogwarts was incredible at many things, but it wasn’t very good at helping students keep up with muggle news. In between laughter, secrets and teasing, the two of you fell asleep beside each other.

Sunday, November 28th, 1976

"Darling, you need to wake up," you heard as you felt a hand on your shoulder. The pain woke you up, rather than her voice, and you groaned, thankfully Marlene thought it was because you were still sleeping. "Teddy wants us in the pitch earlier since he wants to revise the strategy."

You gave her a look, still rather sleepy but nodded, getting up from Lily’s bed, she was still sleeping soundly on the side, and stirred only a little as you stood up, if Marlene noticed anything related to the pyjama you had on, she said nothing. You went straight to change, freshening up a bit by throwing some water straight at your face.

You checked your wound, it looked a lot better, the pain was still there, but it seemed like it was already closing. You threw in some healing spray Remus had given you the night of the prank and wrapped it again. You brushed your teeth, and after you were done, you threw some more water at your face. You felt a lot more awake now, but you were sure breakfast would finish waking you up completely. While it might have not been the best idea to stay awake talking to Lily, you still thought it had been worth it.

You gave a look at your reflection in the small bathroom mirror. "Let’s do this," you told yourself with a smile and stepped out, Marlene was waiting for you outside, she was lacing up her boots."Breakfast?"

She nodded in response, and the two of you walked over to the door. "Should we wake her?" she asked.

You shook your head "She stayed up quite late-"

"Talking to you," she interrupted.

You shrugged. "Yeah, but she didn’t have a game tomorrow," you told her, nodding to the fact that you had been irresponsible, but were okay with it either way. "She’ll wake up before the game, she set an alarm. We should let her rest."

Marlene hummed. "Her date must have been pretty exhausting," she told you with a cheeky smile, you laughed. "Though I still wonder how he managed to convince McGonagall to let him off punishment to go on the date."

You raised your eyebrows "Well… I suppose James can be very convincing."

"He probably cried to McGonagall," she said with a laugh. "Wouldn’t blame him, I’m not sure if Lily would have given him another chance."

"We would have convinced her."

"If only to get James off our backs," Marlene said with a laugh, by then you were already close to the entrance of the great hall.

James and Sirius –as expected– weren’t there when you crossed the huge doors. Teddy was amiably speaking with Tim and Lucas, who would be covering for your friends, while Gale and Anne sat a little bit further to the side. When Gale saw the two of you, he raised his hand and made a gesture for you to walk their way.

Both you and Marlene followed and sat in front of the two of them. You served yourself some apple juice as you all greeted each other. They were both already wearing their uniforms, just like you and Marlene were. The Slytherins also had their uniforms on, and they were all sitting close to each other. You realized the boy that would be covering for Evan was the same you had seen in Barty’s room, the Gaunt kid.

“How’re we feeling?” Gale asked, diverting your attention towards your table again.

You sucked in some air and smiled. “It’s always the excitement before a game, isn’t it?”

“Excitement?!? I’m shitting my pants from how nervous I am,” Gale said as he took a sip of some lavender tea Anne had given him to relax. “There’s no way in hell I’m as good as you as a keeper.”

You almost gasped at his words, you were absolutely shocked the overconfident Gale Thomas, the same boy who had taken your handkerchief away on the tryouts, who was so fast you hadn’t even noticed, would be reduced to a bundle of nerves by something like this, you tilted your head. “Gale you’re brilliant, you’ve always been brilliant!” you said. “Even on the tryouts, you were amazing as a keeper, I’m sure we stopped just as many–”

“You stopped around 5% more than I did, you had a block ratio of 95%,” he said, leg bouncing up and down as he took a bite from a toast.

You leaned down on the table to get his attention. “Gale?” you called, he threw you a look, worry still evident on his face. “They wanted you to be a keeper too,” you told him, pointing at Teddy with a nod. “And if they attempt to throw the ball 20 times, and you stop 19, we would still be many, many points ahead. Alison and Mina are great chasers, but I’m sure you’ll be on par, after all, you defended against Teddy, James, Anne and me on the tryouts.”

Anne nodded. “Say it louder so it gets through his thick head,” she said, a little louder and sounding just a little annoyed. He’s been going over since we came downstairs.

“You really think I’ll be on par?” he asked, looking absolutely hopeful. You smiled, sometimes you forgot how much younger than the rest of the team Gale was.

“I’m sure you’ll outperform them,” you added with a smile and a pat on the shoulder.

“What about you, how long has it been since you played seeker?”

You took a deep breath, pondering on the question, it had definitely been a while, but you had played mini-matches with James several times, just trying to catch the snitch in morning flights. You still had the touch, or at least the two of you were much better than Sirius, who had only managed to catch the snitch like 7 times of the hundreds you had played. And one of them had been because he’d distracted you by blowing you a kiss.

“Officially? Probably in March or something, but I’ve been practising with James on our morning flights.”

“You’re not nervous?” Anne asked as he threw a chip in her mouth.

You bit your lip. “I’m excited,” you responded honestly. “Although, the fact that I’m seeking against Pads’ brother and he won the race does make me feel rather queasy,” you added, deciding to avoid the rest of the drama that he’d caused a few years back.

“I still don’t get why you keep calling him weird names,” Anne said with a shrug.

“Regulus?”

“No, your boyfriend, first it was Puppy, then Pads, as the boys call him. What’s wrong with just… Sirius?”

“Oh, have you heard what they call her?” Marlene intervened. “There’s Starshine, Little Witch, Trouble, Kit–”

“Vix!” Remus said, cutting Marlene off and giving the perfect example.

“Hey Moons,” you said with a smile as you leaned closer to Marlene so he could sit.

“Vix?” Anne asked Marlene in a rather hushed tone.

“Stands for Vixen.”

“And she just lets them call her that?”

“It’s because she’s as sly as a fox,” Remus intervened.

“And it’s still better than Wormtail,” you said, just to get a reaction from Peter who was taking a seat across from you and Rem.

“Oi! Stop it, Wormtail is a perfectly fine nickname thank you very much.”

“If she’s Vixen because she’s a sly fox and Peter is Wormtail because he’s as quiet as a mouse–” Anne started.

You snorted. “When has Peter ever been quiet as a mouse?!”

Yes, it was true Peter wasn’t nearly as loud as James or Sirius, and it made it especially evident since he was always hanging around the two boys but Peter was far from “quiet as a mouse”, if anything, Remus was quieter, and that was only half true, because once you got him talking about a book, he could go on and on with it, just like James could talk about Quidditch for hours.

“And why is he Wormtail then?” Anne asked.

“He looks like a rat,” Remus responded simply, which would have sounded mean if he didn’t have a complicit smile as he stared at Peter.

“Quit it with your word games you two!” Peter warned in a rather stern tone, and yet, there was a certain shimmer behind his eyes, as if he knew more than he let on. It was all in the secrecy, really, on being part of the brotherhood that actually knew what was happening behind the nicknames. The shared secret allowed you to do and say things that people didn’t quite understand, even if you sometimes had to play offended. You enjoyed being able to be part of it, part of them.

“And Remus is Moony, isn’t it?” Anne asked, “Why’s that?”

“Because he’s insane,” you and Peter responded at about the same time, before bursting out into a laugh, Remus pulled your hair lightly in response and you turned to him with your tongue out.

“If you keep it up, little witch, I’m not gonna give you this,” he said as he pulled his hand up for you to see, his sleeve fell back a little and you could see what he meant, Sirius’ lucky hair tie.

“You wouldn’t go against Pads’ wishes,” you told him as you grabbed his hands and started to tug at the hair tie, but he dragged his hand away, leaving you with a pout.

“You sure about that luv?” He asked, eyebrows quirked.

“Confident,” you said, attempting to drag his hands down, but it was pretty useless, his muscles wouldn’t even budge, freaking werewolf strength, you thought with a huff “Reeem!” you whined. You wondered for a moment what that strength would do as a beater in quidditch and almost shivered.

He just smiled and tilted his head “How about you ask for it nicely?”

You rolled your eyes. “Darling Moony,” you said, exaggerating. “Can I please have Puppy’s hair tie?”

He knew you were playing a part, he could also hear the sarcasm dripping from your voice, and yet… he rather enjoyed that all of your attention was on him. And Merlin the look that you were giving him, it felt almost as good as when Sirius climbed onto the side of his bed, grabbed his hand, and manhandled it until he managed to slide the hair tie in. It still smelled of Sirius’ hair long after he had left for detention. Remus tried not to smell it, he didn’t want to be weird about it. But he couldn’t help himself.

Now he had you all over him, legs pressed against his and hands all over his arm as you attempted to pull it down, and he adored it. Even if he knew he shouldn’t, even if he knew you were Sirius’, he loved having your undivided attention. Your eyes on him, and no one else.

“Pretty please?” you added, and now you had that sneaky little puppy dog face you gave him when you wanted something. The same face he could barely say no to when you weren’t pressed against him.

He sighed and lowered his arm, allowing you to take the tie from him, relishing on the way your hands brushed over his own. Your hands were much smaller than Sirius’, even if a little rougher from so much quidditch and not that much piano, but he liked them just as much as he liked the ones of the boy.

When you managed to slide it off, you pulled back a little to add it to your hair “Have you eaten?” Peter asked from the front. Suddenly you remembered it wasn’t only you and Remus in the room and felt awkward for half a second, but everyone seemed to find the interaction the most normal, especially Peter and Marlene who hung around you and Remus often.

You looked down at your clean plate, you had been so focused on comforting Gale and then on Remus’ talk, or perhaps just on Remus, that you had forgotten to even serve yourself anything. You shook your head and filled your cup. “How much time do we have?” you asked Marlene.

“About 15 minutes,” she informed.

“That should be enough,” you said before taking a drink and grabbing onto a toast before spreading butter on it. Then some cream cheese and you were about to grab the marmalade when Remus spoke.

“Here,” he said as he passed over a plate with fruit to you.

“Thanks, Rem,” you said as you grabbed a few of the berries and placed them on top of your bread. You then started munching on some of the other fruits on the plate. You didn’t realise, with the rush, that the plate actually had only your favourite fruit. Remus had picked them up from the centre of the table as you prepared your toast.

You pretty much gobbled your food, like you had been doing all week, even if the absolute craving for meat had significantly diminished -especially when you were around Remus you noticed- the hunger seemed to prevail. All the types of hunger. Every time you saw Sirius you had the urge to kiss him over and over again like that time in the passageways. That type of hunger didn’t seem to subside when you were around Remus.

You stood up, Teddy, Tim and Lucas had already left, and Marlene was just finishing her eggs while Anne and Gale stood up. Remus was still eating, a lot more calmer as the four of you motioned to move.

“Little Witch!” he said, just before you started walking towards the door, he used his wand to levitate a blueberry muffin towards your face. “Take this for the way.”

“What about me,” Marlene asked.

“It was the last one, sorry.”

Marlene gasped playfully. “I swear, this is what you call preferences,” she said with a humph and turned her heel.

“I’ll save one for you next time,” Remus said with a simple shrug, and Marlene just gave him an incredulous stare before marching off behind Anne and Gale. You gave Remus a look and he shrugged again. “It was for you, she’s playing what she always does, you aren’t,” he added, did that make sense? he sure hoped it did.

“Thanks, Rem,” you told him with a smile. “I’ll see you in the game, yeah?”

“Wouldn’t miss it.”

“See you there too Pete,” you said with a wave, the boy nodded and hummed in response, too busy picking the onion bits out of the eggs. Peter didn’t like onion, and he always took his sweet time taking it out of his eggs, Sirius had given him a spell, but he said it wasn’t as good as using his hands and eyes.

You moved to follow behind Marlene and had almost gotten all the way out of the room when two Slytherins cornered you near the doors. You smiled.

“You did it, didn’t you?” Comet asked, a complicit smile on her face.

“Had to be you, Crouch has been on your back for months,” Nox added.

“And then there was the incident with Evan, Severus has always been an ass to you and Mulciber follows them along wherever they go,” Comet intervened.

You gulped, a small smirk on your lips. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“And you were in my room, jeez, how the hell didn’t I notice.”

“You must sleep pretty heavy,” you said with a shrug.

“Ha! She’s admitting it!”

“I can’t confirm nor deny anything…”

Nox looked dumbfounded while Comet laughed. “Thanks for the heads up,” she told you.

“What warning?” you asked with a complicit smile.

Nox breathed out, a smile playing on his lips again. “Should have heard his screams, he woke up drenched in sweat and crying like a baby,” he added, smile turning to smirk. You had never seen so much Slytherin-ness on him before. “Serves him well.”

You bit your cheek to avoid making your smile bigger. “Well guys, there’s a game I need to attend.”

“Good luck!” Comet said with a smile as you waved them goodbye and started walking away.

“We hope you lose,” added Nox casually, he actually liked Regulus, he’d always been a good roommate. Comet dug her elbow on his stomach, she didn’t care much for the Quidditch team, except for Minho, but she liked you better.

“I don’t, I hope you win!” she said with a smile “but invite me to the celebration party, I’d hate to miss it.”

You turned with a smile and a wink. “Of course, you’re always invited to the Gryffindor parties.”

You continued walking towards the pitch, you bumped into Nina, who hugged you and wished you a great game. She told you she’d be watching on the Gryffindor side with Sibyl, which made you smile.

After a few more minutes you were already on the pitch, everyone was there already, and Teddy was talking with Gale now, he turned to you and called your name, using his hand to prompt you to come.“James said you’ll be seeking.” You nodded, you knew. “But… and I know this might be a lot to ask, but could you keep an eye on Gale?”

“But he’s brilliant!” you argued, and then turned to him, standing on the side. “You’re brilliant Gale, I told you already.”

“He knows,” Teddy said, getting your attention again. “But he asked me to ask you to do it, just in case.”

You looked between the two boys and realised that more than anything, what Gale wanted was reassurance, so you smiled and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Of course, I’ve got you covered,” you bolstered him. “Just do your thing, be as fast as you always are but stay in the goals, all right?”

“Will you teach me how to do the backflip?” he asked.

You nodded, “How about I teach you during our next practice, in case you ever have to play keeper again?”

He nodded excitedly. “I want to be as good as you one day.”

“You’ll be even better,” you told him with a smile. And you truly believed he would, it was almost like a hunch.

“All right guys,” Teddy said, “10 laps, we need some warm-up.” You nodded and did as told, speeding through the pitch as fast as your broom allowed, then up and down, practising the break before reaching the ground.

Eventually, Teddy called everyone down, and you all started to gear up. You helped Gale with the many layers of protective gear he’d be wearing and then sat down near the bleachers to fasten your own gear. Most of the gear was similar to the stuff you wore normally. Although James had given you a pair of old gloves, that he said he’d used to win his first match. You tried not to think about the fact that your hands were so small that James’ had been the same size when he was 13, but then you remembered being James, and it actually made sense.

“Feeling ready?” you heard a soft voice from behind and saw Remus’ hands out of the corner of your eye, as he sat down on the grass beside you.

You hummed. “Yeah, I just need to finish with this,” you said as you pointed at the laces that you were passing through and around your shins.

Remus leaned on his palms as he looked up. “It might rain soon,” he informed.

“It’s a wonderful day!” You told him with a smirk, he gave you a side eye but smiled.

“Here,” he said, giving you a small, marble-sized transparent ball.

“A swamp bomb?” you asked curiously as you looked through the transparent-ish ball and looked at all the little murky water details inside.

“Throw it on the ground and you get an instant swamp,” he said with a smile. “Sirius and I trapped it on the marble a few years ago, we made one for each, they always carry them on rainy games.”

“For… luck?” you asked with a bit of a frown.

Remus quirked an eyebrow. “In case you slip off your broom,” he responded matter of factly, “use it and you’ll fall on water rather than on the grass, it’ll break your fall”

You gasped in shock, a surprised expression that turned into a smile the more you thought about it. “That’s insanely clever! It should be used as a failsafe for every quidditch player. I mean change the swamp for cleaner water and you have the perfect little artefact.”

Remus nodded in agreement, “Keep it in you, all right?”

You nodded. “You really did take the whole “taking care of me” thing seriously,” you said as you pocketed the marble.

“Take care of you?” he asked with a frown.

“Didn’t Sirius ask?” you asked a little confused.

He had.

Although, Remus had been too busy trying not to blush when he grabbed his hand to put the hair tie in. Did he? he wondered, perhaps he did, I wasn’t exactly listening. Remus cleared his throat, you noticed he did that quite often when he was around you, you wondered if maybe he was getting sick or something. “Yeah, I… yeah, but you’re my best friend so, still…”

You nudged him with your shoulder. “Don’t get all soft with me,” you joked. “You know I’ll be alright, don’t you?”

He propped his elbows on his knees and leaned his head on them, giving you an expression you could only describe as cute, even for Remus. “I know,” he reassured. “How’s the shoulder?” he asked, brushing his fingers on it lightly. Perhaps he was giving himself too many liberties around you these days, you didn’t seem to mind it.

“Better, it still hurts, but much better. Think James would have allowed me to play if he hadn’t gotten detention?”

He humphed. “You would have convinced him, you always do. Maybe it’s the fairy bIood?”

You shrugged, “Nah, mom was the last one in line with the ability to glamour.”

He smiled, “How about going against Reg?”

You swallowed thickly, you had told Remus about not using the hexbag on him. “It’s… It’s whatever.”

“You still resent him?”

“Am I petty?” you asked with a frown. “It’s… It’s not even about me and Sirius anymore, you know? It’s about the betrayal. I trusted him, Rem. I did, and Sirius warned me, he told me he was always doing what Walburga and Orion asked but I chose to trust Regulus. I thought I saw something in him, maybe a friend but… I guess I got my gut feeling wrong then.”

Remus nodded as he listened. “Did you ever talk to him about it?”

Yes, Remus, the voice of reason, of course, that’s what he would ask. You averted your gaze and shook your head, “He sent a letter once.”

“And?”

“I burned it down without even opening it.”

“You really have a knack for burning things that could be useful to you.”

You hit his shoulder lightly, knowing exactly what he was talking about, the werewolf book pages. “Either way, I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to talk to him, things got really awkward when I blew him off during the race.”

Remus sighed, he really had to go and fall in love with two of the most headstrong and stubborn people in his life. He was about to say something when Teddy called for you. You turned to him, a smile plastered on your face as if the sad subject hadn’t been touched at all. “Enjoy the show then,” you said in the most enticing tone before standing up and pulling your broom up to your hands without even saying a word. Impressive, Remus thought, but then again, she’s always been impressive.

“The game is about to start,” Teddy informed, “Mckinnon, Lucas; Crouch will be all over Gale because he’s new, I want you to keep your eyes on him.”

“I… I think perhaps he might be all over (Y/N),” Marlene said. “He’s got beef with her.”

Yeah, Beef is certainly a way to call it, you thought. “Nah, Minho is friends with her, she won’t be in the danger zone too often.”

“I’m here,” you said, intervening with a raised hand, they were talking as if you weren’t. “And while I do think he’ll be trying to shoot the bludgers straight to my face, because that’s just who Barty is, I’ll stay close to Gale, no need to choose between the two, how does that sound?” you asked.

“Fine, but don’t stay in place if you see the snitch, go right behind it.”

“I was planning to.” You liked Teddy, you really did, but he wasn’t a great captain, James was.

“Davis, Tim, we’ll play offensive.” Teddy was still coordinating with the chasers when you heard a loud whistle sound from the referee.

You all walked towards the centre of the pitch, Teddy at the forefront, you and Gale to each side of him. The Slytherin team was right in front of you, Regulus was looking at you with a bit of a frown, his lips pursed, as if he wanted to say something but was holding his tongue.

You stared at him, and then at Barty who was glaring at you. You stood a little straighter, pulling your head back just a little and giving him the most unbothered and cocksure expression you could have mustered. It worked, his eyes narrowed and his glare thickened. Regulus, who had been watching the entire exchange, almost smiled proudly at your stance. You really were the same girl he had met years ago at the resort, perhaps even a little bolder now that you were older.

“Captains, greet each other,” the referee said –a Ravenclaw player who had been commissioned for the job. Dimitry and Teddy stepped ahead and shook hands.

You shot Minho a look as they stretched their hands and he winked at you. You knew he wasn’t going to make it easy for you just because you were friends, and you were thrilled to finally be able to play against him. You had heard stories, and you had seen him in practice games, he was good, professional player material even.

“Seekers,” the referee called, you turned to look at them, “your turn.”

You took a step forward and awkwardly shook Regulus’ hand. It was as soft as Sirius’, you still found it impressive how much they looked like each other and how different they were from the other, “I’m looking forward to playing against you.”

“I’m looking forward to beating you,” you said, a lot more bitterly than you originally intended for it to sound.

Regulus scoffed but smiled, that’s definitely something you would have said to him before the incident, although your tone would have for sure been different. The referee let the snitch out, and it circled Reg before circling around you and flying up into the air. You stared at the shiny orb until it disappeared in the air. Gale and Dimitry were already on the goals. There was another loud sound whistle, along with sparks and the game started.

You did as you promised, flew straight towards the goals and kept a decent distance between you and Gale, flying a little higher as you looked through every bit of the field to try and find the little golden ball. It hadn’t even been 10 minutes and the sky started to rumble. You looked up, and felt the first trickle of rain over your cheek. You smiled, things were about to get good. You had promised you’d stay near the goals, and you really did intend to do it. But then you saw something moving in the distance, barely a glimmer, a flicker of gold through the thick drops of rain. You turned to Regulus, he was looking towards the same spot you were. So you dived that way about at the same time he did.

You saw Anne Davis get a grip on the ball and dive straight towards Volkov’s goals, she missed the shot and he threw the ball back to one of their chasers but Tim intercepted and shot it back, managing to score some points for your team. The crowd erupted in cheers and even you joined in their cheers. Tim beamed from his spot, it was the first time he played an official game, and managing to score was a huge moment for him, although you never doubted his ability.

You and Regulus were almost side by side, flying towards the east side of the pitch, but the snitch seemed to have vanished again, he did a swift break a few metres from the ground but you continued down hoping to see the sneaky little ball somewhere, breaking just before you reached the grass, and rolling around the bottom on circles to diffuse the momentum of the fall. You looked up, Gale was being surrounded by the beaters of both teams, while Marlene and Lucas were trying to push the ball to the other side Minho and Barty were viciously dragging it back to Gale. You took a deep breath and flew as fast as possible towards them, not quite looking at Gale but pretending you had seen something. That would get them off him and to follow you instead.

“Don’t do anything stupid” you heard Sirius’ voice echo in your head. Well, it’s not stupid, you attempted to reason. It’s not like trying to stop a bludger with my own hands or stepping in front of one to defend Gale, definitely not like throwing your wand on the ground when facing a werewolf. This is teamwork.

You followed through with your plan and continued taking sharp turns, emulating the kind of turns the snitch would make you take and surely enough, in a matter of seconds, you had both Minho and Barty all over you, throwing the bludgers at your face as you skid and dodged them over and over. Thank Merlin you had decent reflexes.

Gale seemed to be a lot calmer now, and even if the reserve player, Solacis Gaunt, had scored 10 points earlier, he was visibly struggling to get past Gale’s defences. You smiled proudly at yourself as you continued to soar through the air, and dodged a few more throws from Crouch. Perhaps it was a bad idea to taunt him, but you couldn’t help yourself; when you steered clear of yet another shot from him, you turned around with a cocky smile and waved.

Crouch did not look happy. Minho was laughing in the background and Marlene, who was still close to Gale, watched the whole interaction with a bit of a frown. That was it, the stupid thing Sirius had told you not to do.

Even Remus, who didn’t have such a good view of the situation from the bleachers, noticed how you were haughtily making fun of Barty’s shot and stiffened in his seat. You could be so insolent sometimes, often failing to realise the consequences of what your actions could do to you. Like getting you thrown on the shrieking shack or almost eaten alive. Regardless, he had never seen anyone be so damn stunning while boasting. Actually, that was a lie, Sirius was equally beautiful when he did.

The game was tight, Regulus and you were darting almost side by side, he seemed a little confused at first because he couldn’t see the snitch you were so animatedly looking for, but then he noticed: your worrying looks at Gale, the little proud smile when he managed to stop a quaffle after Minho and Barty were off his back. She’s protecting him.

Regulus knew Gale, they were in the same year, and he knew he was a good guy, he was always studying and even if he was a little too loud and conceited for his own taste, he respected him. In fact, he was a little surprised he was so self-conscious about the game since his very confident persona would rarely waver into diffidence.

And then he saw the way you threw the boy a thumbs up and he realised: that could have been the kind of friendship that developed between the two of you. If he had done things differently, if he had perhaps… gone to the waterpark with you and Sirius. Maybe then you wouldn’t be so angry about the lies he’d told to keep you from harm. But he was also certain that what you wanted, for him to admit that it had been your idea, wouldn’t be something he would ever change, he wouldn’t have done anything to put you in danger.

From the very beginning, you had been kind and friendly to him, like you were to everyone you met, and even if you were clearly drawn to Sirius like a moth to a flame, you had never left him out. You’d even tried to convince him to come along, but he was too scared, he’d seen the way his parents punished Sirius. He didn’t want his mom to pull that kind of face, let alone those kinds of spells… Yeah, he might have been a bit of a coward, but everyone was safe in the end, and you were happy now, which in a way made him happy too.

He hadn’t seen the snitch either way, so he followed your game, darting behind as close to you as he could. He knew Minho would control his shots if he thought he could hit him, so in a way, he was protecting you and himself, since your team’s beater would be doing the same. Although –and he was indeed curious about this– they seemed to be sticking to Gale rather than following behind you and protecting you, or trying to tumble down the other players, like they should.

But then it happened, another glimmer like the one you had seen earlier, passed just over Dimitry Volkov. He swallowed, eyeing you, but you hadn’t seen it, no you were too busy trying to avoid Barty’s aggressive blows. Regulus darted straight towards Volkov, and you instantly knew he was probably following the snitch. So you went right behind him, managing to get shoulder-to-shoulder against each other.

BIoody hell, she’s fast.

He knew that too, but it had never been as evident as having you flying against him, and you didn’t even have your Dark Nimbus anymore. Eventually, you saw the snitch too, and picked up your speed. Both you and Regulus were on the verge of getting it, the sly little ball darting just away from your grasp as if it had a mind of its own.

It didn’t matter, both you and Regulus were as skilled as the other, which was something to say about the boy, since you had been doing this for a lot longer than he had. And even then, you found it a little hard to keep up with him in the sight department. Yes, you were faster, but the snitch often got lost in between the rain in your perspective, but Regulus seemed to always know where to go, never losing sight of it, which was getting on your nerves.

You lost sight of it again and whispered “fuck,” the bludger darted your way and you speed forward, it brushed over the sweeping side of your broom and made you lose balance but the grip you had on the handle was strong and you managed to straighten up before the other bludger sped your way.

You managed to move away from it this time, but not before sending Minho an incredulous look, he just shrugged with a small smile in response “I told you I wouldn’t make it easy for you darling!” You rolled your eyes but nodded, moving out of the way as Marlene shot the bludger back, straight towards Minho, who barely had enough time to react.

You chuckled at his incredulous reaction, as if he was genuinely shocked. Which made sense, last time he’d seen Marlene, she was still guarding Gale like a loyal dog. She threw you a look, a small nod as she let you know “I’m with you” without having to say a word. You looked at her with worry and turned to give Gale a look, once you made sure he was fine, you turned to her again with a smile.

Yes, Teddy had told her to stay by Gale’s side, but you truly needed to have 0 common sense to stay guarding someone who didn’t need protection and leave someone that was struggling with so many bludgers thrown their way by themselves. Besides, you were roommates, friends, she wasn’t gonna let you fall off that broom.

With Marlene on your side, you managed to let go of some of the extra apprehension you had been withholding to try and stay on your broom, she was countering the bludgers and you finally managed to focus on the snitch.

You tore through the air, faster than you had in the previous game, and faster than you had in the race, even without your broom, you’d somehow managed to pick up more speed, the wind whipping past with a biting force. You weren’t sure why it was happening, but you were benefiting from it so you didn’t think much about it.

You were shoulder to shoulder with Regulus again when your eyes landed on the snitch, it wasn’t far, you just needed to push through a little further. You could feel the sharp droplets of rain hitting against your face like icy needles from how fast you were moving, and the clouding in your glasses made it a little hard to see much of anything, but you were focused. Gaze fixed solely on the elusive glint of the snitch, tantalisingly close. You weren’t going to lose sight of it this time, not now that you were ahead of Reg.

As you neared the prize, almost forgetting your surroundings, you felt it, the yanking of your broom, the same yanking that had jolted you off it a few weeks past. Clenching your teeth, you tightened your grip and tried to push through, ignoring the feeling, you were so close. The snitch was within reach; your outstretched hands were on the verge of capturing it, ignoring the strain on your shoulder from how fiercely you were using your arm to grapple the broom, you fought to maintain control over it.

Regulus noticed “Barty!” He spat angrily. You didn’t hear any of it, the broom was pulling backwards, prompting a split-second decision. So you did the only logical thing you could and harnessed the momentum to leap towards the snitch just as the broom slipped from beneath you. Then, the fall began.

The whole crowd seemed to be holding their breath. Regulus, Marlene and Minho, who had been the closest all tried to fly towards you, to catch you before you hit the ground, not that you noticed.

You were rather high when you started to fall, and it almost felt like it was in slow motion, but you had already dragged your hand to the marble Remus had given you earlier when you felt the broom slipping from under your legs. You threw the marble to the ground and braced yourself for the rest of the fall. Trying to keep your eyes open as you wrapped your arms around your body and hoped to fall into the murky water.

In less than two seconds, you felt the freezing hit of the water all around you, lowering your temperature even more. Fortunately, the pocket swamp was deep enough, you didn’t even reach the bottom as you fell a few metres down the water. It took a minute to adjust, opening your eyes as you looked down, managing to see only darkness and some vines of seaweed. However, just as relief washed over you, and you started swimming upwards, you felt something grip onto your ankle. You looked down, panic cursing through your veins when you noticed the bony hand attempting to drag you down. What the fuck?

Above the water, the game seemed to be frozen, the players didn’t know if they should continue playing when two members of the Slytherin team and two of the Gryffindor were completely distracted by the accident.

“Minho, Regulus!” Dimitri shouted, “to your fucking positions.”

Teddy seemed to be about to do the same thing when Marlene threw him a warning look and he shot up, indicating the rest of the team to be on guard with his hands instead of speaking.

Minho turned to Dimitry, second-guessing himself, before turning back to the rippling water in front of him, you weren’t out yet. He shook his head and chose to stay, taking his wand and pointing it to the water “Hidroclearus!” The murky water responded to the spell, gradually clearing to reveal the unfolding scene beneath the surface.

Regulus didn’t even turn to look at Dimitri, he was fully focused on the water, worried.

Remus, who had seen you fall, had already crossed half the pitch with a panicked look on his face, followed by a terrified Lily, and a very concerned Mary. Your Slytherin and Ravenclaw friends were on the edge of their seats. Everyone except for Sibyl, that was trying to get Nina –who was crying hysterically–to calm down.

Someone was trying to stop Remus from going deeper into the field, so they wouldn’t interrupt the game further, but he pushed them off his way easily, Lily and Mary weren’t as lucky, and they were stopped by the game staff as Remus strode towards the swamp.

Under the thick water, your initial shock faded quickly, and you realised that whenever the boys had trapped the swamp in the marble, they had also trapped some kind of water creature. A water creature that was clearly pissed and very hungry after being carried around the boys’ pockets for so long. You pulled your wand out and cast a wordless reducto, getting it to snap his hand away, and started swimming upwards as fast as you could. By then, the water was clearer and Minho saw you, struggling to outswim the creature.

You threw a few other curses at the thing but it was relentless, it wasn’t thinking anymore, the creature had starved inside the marble for so long, the pain your spells caused was completely overshadowed by the rumbling of its stomach the moment it noticed: you were food.

Regardless, there was something you had that the monster didn’t, and that was raw stubbornness, you kept shooting jinxes and swimming however you could, and then you saw a hand, you had no idea who the owner was, but a stranger’s hand was still better than being eaten alive, you reached for it, the hand gripped around your wrist and hauled you up.

Seconds later you were finally above water, gasping for air and panting, you turned to the side, Minho, you realised. You looked back warily, pulling him by his robe as you stared at the water, and only relaxed when you were sure the thing was not about to follow.

Regardless you pulled your wand and whispered “glacius.” A thick layer of frost started to coat the lake and you finally exhaled. You pulled your head back, looking at the sky, the game was still going, but everyone was on edge. Regulus was looking at you in shock, but he seemed more angry than anything and Marlene rushed towards you before the lake froze completely.

She placed her hands around your face, “Are you… are you okay?”

You nodded, head a little squiffy as you tried to gain back focus, the surge of adrenaline finally draining and letting you feel the discomfort of the fall, and the one from your wound. Then you looked up again. “Why… why are they still playing?”

“Regulus stopped searching for the snitch the moment you fell,” she told you, Minho was still standing beside you, worry evident on his furrowed brows, he’d never seen you so fazed. Remus had, but that did not make his long strides slow down. He was also rather angry about the game continuing even after the entire thing had happened. Everyone should have stopped, everyone should be helping you.

He exchanged a look with Minho, the boy stared at Remus’s eyes for a second, seeing the worry and his concern, it reached deeper than his own, and he instantly knew. Yun Minho, the boy who had once kissed Remus, and knew the meaning behind his eyes from the amount of stolen glances they had shared at some point, was the first one to realise how irrevocably in love he was with you.

“That… that doesn’t matter.”

“I bIoody well agree but those are not the rules!” Marlene said, a little riled up but trying to control her anger.

“No,” you said slowly. “I mean, the game is over.”

Marlene frowned, and then Regulus noticed, in one of your hands, the one you had kept glued to your body the entire time, knuckles white from your hard grip, there was something, a small, unfolding wing, and he looked at you, absolutely stunned.

Still looking at Marlene you gave her a lazy smile, tilted your head and pulled your hand up, slowly unwrapping it until you were holding the snitch in between your index finger and thumb. Marlene’s jaw dropped while Minho looked at you impressed and patted you on the back.

You didn’t wince, but turned to him with a smile. “That was quite a game,” he said.

You nodded, letting a soft laugh out, raising your hand higher, so people would notice. The commentator, who had been struggling on whether to keep up with what was happening in the air or what was happening with you, gasped. “She has the snitch!” he said pointing at you, more surprised than anything before clearing his throat and announcing it properly, “That’s 150 points for Gryffindor! The final score is 200 against 60.”

You raised your eyebrows, Gryffindor had been losing by one shot. You could see your teammates start to fly down but were distracted by a bone-crushing hug, you hadn’t seen him coming, but you knew it was Remus instantly, his smell was unmistakable.

You smiled at his hug, you knew you were soaking him with murky, smelly water, but he didn’t seem to care, he was just glad you were all right, you almost snuggled your head on his chest, basking on his warmth, warmth that he had somehow kept despite the cold rain still falling over everyone.

“Rem?” you managed to mumble, he hummed in response, his head was on your shoulder, his eyes shut tightly as a tear of relief soaked your robe, you were fat too wet to notice. “You’re… you’re crushing me a little.”

His head snapped from its place and he looked at you with worry as he pulled back, his hands still on your arms. Now looking all over you, trying to make sure you weren’t hurt, that he hadn’t hurt you either.

You noticed instantly, the panic in his beautiful brown eyes. “It was just a little,” you reassured. “I’m fine,” you added. “Thanks to you, actually.”

Professor Pendragon had rushed towards you and stared at the lake, Nightshade was trailing behind, Remus stepped aside, but kept his hand on your back as the dark-haired teacher leaned closer to inspect you. “There’s a water spirit under the swamp,” you informed, “It’s hungry.”

She raised her eyebrows at you, impressed at your quick thinking. “That’s why you frosted it.”

“Didn’t want it to come up after me.”

“You had to fight it, presumably.”

You nodded, “It wasn’t that hard.”

Remus narrowed his eyes, it was as if you and Seraphina were saying a lot more words to each other than the ones he was actually listening to, it was in the intense gaze you shared, you seemed uncomfortable, almost on edge, but she seemed… pleased.

Professor Pendragon intervened a little later, he called you by your last name “You must be taken to the infirmary.” You threw a worried look at Remus, he had also wanted to take you there, but he bIoody well knew he couldn’t.

“I’m fine, it won’t be necessary,” you said with a smile. Nightshade tilted her head backwards, she knew why you had declined, you were clever, you knew people couldn’t see the probably still rather fresh would your werewolf friend had caused you. “I’ll just… go dry up and I’ll be good as new, the water broke most of the fall,” you added, reassuringly.

Cunning, Nightshade realised, she would have also been fooled, if she hadn’t known better. But she did, and she knew how much that fall must have stung.

Lily and Mary had somehow managed to get across now that the game was over and they were fast approaching but Gale beat them to it, and he also pulled you into a hug “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…” he repeated like a mantra. You frowned at him and allowed him to pull back of his own accord. “If it hadn’t been for me and my-”

You shook your head. “Nothing was your fault, Gale. I’m fine, we won! You did incredible today too.”

He still seemed a little uneasy but nodded. “Yeah Thomas, it wasn’t your fault, if anything, it was Teddy who told me and Lucas to stay by your side,” Marlene said, throwing the chaser an angry side eye. He recoiled, he’d been staying a little further from the reunion. Lily and Marlene came over next, squeezing you in between the two of them before Peter did the same.

The rest of your friends also came down to tell you how happy they were that you were fine, Nina had pulled you into a hug almost as tight as Remus’ and didn’t let go of you for a few minutes while Sybil attempted to pull her off a few times. After a few more hugs, everyone seemed to be ready to start the Gryffindor celebration party. You had whispered Comet the passwords when she came to make sure you were all right, and she smiled, telling you she’d bring Nox along, even if he wanted you to lose initially.

After you and most of your friends started to walk towards the Common Room you felt a rather sharp pain in your arm. You winced but swallowed a whimper, you didn’t want to worry any of your friends, especially Lily and Remus, who looked somewhat at ease now.

“I’m gonna go to the bathroom,” you announced.

Lily frowned, “I’ll come along…”

You shook your head. “No need. It’ll be quick, I’ll see you in the common room. Could you help me find something cosy to change into?”

She gave you a scrutinising look but nodded. Stepping ahead, but as you diverted, you felt an arm stopping you. “Where do you think you’re going, young lady?” he joked.

You turned to Remus with a diverted smile. “To the Toilets. Care to accompany me?” you said the last bit with sarcasm.

Remus chuckled. “What if I do?” he said then, in a rather teasing tone. “With the magnet you have for trouble I wouldn’t be surprised if you bumped into a troll or something.”

“A troll? In the girl’s lavatories?! Don’t be ridiculous, Rem! Go on and spare some fire whiskey from me, why don’t you?”

He wasn’t too sure about letting you go on your own, but he also knew how you were feeling, you had been literally surrounded by people from the moment you’d stepped out of the murky lake, and while it was nice to get hugged and all after getting hurt, sometimes all you needed was time to process what was had happened, he would know, he certainly did sometimes.

Perhaps, like he had many times, you just wanted a few minutes for peace and quiet. And although it took him a few seconds, he reluctantly let go of his grip on your arm and allowed you to go. “How much?” he asked with a smile.

“At least a flask,” you responded, he arched an eyebrow at you. “Come on, I’ve had quite a week, I deserve it, don’t I?”

He chuckled and nodded. “I’ll save two then.”

You smiled widely “That’s why I love you, Moony!” You had used a rather playful tone when you said it but that didn’t stop the knot that formed on the boy’s stomach, “See you in a bit, yeah?”

The boy nodded and you turned towards the toilets, speeding through to check on the wound. You removed your robe and sweater and used a spell to wipe them off the murky water as you checked the wound. Quickly washing it over the sink as you saw the splotches of cherry red slide down, contrasting against the porcelain white sink.

You rolled your eyes, the fucking wound was getting more annoying and inconvenient than painful at this point. Regardless, you dried it out, threw some of the painful ointment you had kept in your pocket with a spell for it to remain fresh in case of an emergency and wrapped it again, wiping the tears that fell from your eyes from the sharp sting of the dreadful but effective medicine you had somehow crafted.

You took a deep breath and moved towards the outside, you were just rounding the corner when you heard two voices, two very recognizable voices.

“You fucking asshole,” Regulus said, anger dripping from his tone.

“Off me, Black!” Barty countered. You leaned your head over, Regulus had him pushed against the wall as Barty fumed and tried to squirm his way out. Regulus was taller, but Barty had always been more vicious, and you knew how strong he was, after all, he had been the one to haul you to the shack on Monday.

“You do that again and you’re dеad meat,” Regulus seethed in between gritted teeth. “You got what you wanted, now back the fuck off!”

“Why are you even trying to… You didn’t have the nightmares I had! You SAW Evan, in the fucking infirmary!” Barty seemed to feel actual grief over that last bit.

“You both had that one coming, you think I’m blind? You’ve had it against them since the quaffle incident.”

“Well, she had it coming too!” The boy against the wall complained. It’s about me, you realised. And it almost pissed you off that Regulus would even try to defend you, who the hell does he think he is?!

You turned around to leave when you heard Regulus mutter a jinx and heard a howl from Crouch, you leaned over the wall again, to try and see what had happened, but Barty spotted you.

“Bitch’s here,” he said as he nodded your way, his jaw slightly slack.

“Yeah and this is none of my business,” you said, skipping past the two boys, not sparing a second glance at Barty, who was on the floor clutching his stomach.

“Hey!” you heard Regulus’ distressed voice “Wait up.”

Barty huffed at his reaction, rolling his eyes as Regulus trailed behind you like a lost puppy. Fucking Blacks’ obsession with that fucking girl, he thought as he stood up and limped to the other side.

“I said wait up!” Regulus said, grabbing your forearm. You yanked it away from him, with a vicious frown.

“Regulus, don’t fucking touch me,” you said in a warning tone, he seemed to recoil but stood his ground.

“Let me explain,” he said, running past you and blocking your path, the anguished look on his face reminded you so much of Sirius you almost folded “I–”

“No need to explain,” you dismissed while shaking your head. “Whatever you do with your life is your fucking business. And no need to worry about it, I don’t like talking behind people's backs like others. I’m no snitch, and I’m not gonna go running my mouth either.”

He seemed taken aback by that, blinking a few times as he processed the information. “You…” he stammered, “you never read my letter.”

You scoffed. “Of course I didn’t fucking read your letter Regulus, there was nothing you could have said to take back what you’d done. Sirius and I didn’t talk to each other for fucking years after that, I thought he hated me!” You were angry, bottled-up emotions spilling out of you like boiling water in a small pot. He was quiet, staring at you like he didn’t know what to say “Fucking thought so,” you whispered and skipped past him.

He had thought of so many things to say to you over the years. He was sure you hated him because he hadn’t let out the fact that it had been your idea, not for telling his parents about the escapade, and of all the times he had run this conversation in his head, none of them had included that fact. He felt like short-circuiting, and you were about to turn the corner when he managed to say something. “It wasn’t me!” You continued your way. “I didn’t tell them, I wasn’t the snitch!”

You froze in place, what? that… it doesn’t make sense.

Regulus took a deep breath, grateful you were listening, finally listening. “Someone sent an owl to my dad, they said they’d seen you in town.”

You turned to look at him, your eyes analysing him, his words, his red-rimmed eyes and the absolute raw emotion visible on his face, nothing like the stoic Regulus you were accustomed to.

“He asked me where you were,” he continued narrating. “I told him you had gone flying but he already knew. Then he slipped something in my drink and I couldn’t– it was veritaserum.”

You looked at him shocked, he was about to cry from the memory. Veritaserum? His parents used veritaserum on him?!? You wouldn’t put it past Orion and Walburga but still, it was absolutely heinous. “Reggie….”

He let out something in between a breath and a sob when he heard the nickname, the same nickname he had hated but longed to hear after the incident. He looked so much like Sirius you wanted nothing more than to comfort him, you hastily realised how awful you had been.

“You never…” you swallowed. “You didn’t snitch on us.” He shook his head. You sighed, you face falling. “BIoody hell, I’m an asshole,” you said thinking back to all the times you had ignored and blown off the boy, your boyfriend’s little brother for fucks sake.

“You didn’t know,” he tried to reassure.

“Ignorance is no excuse,” you managed to say, disgusted with the way you had treated the poor boy. A boy who –and you had noticed from the beginning– craved a decent friendship, some kind of human connection. All the attachment you had felt for him before the escapade at the hotel came crashing back, and you groaned and how much of an asshole you had been “Sorry.”

He shrugged, “Does that… does that mean you don’t hate me anymore?”

You sighed again, cringing at yourself for causing such an impression on him. “Of course, I don’t fucking hate you Reggie. I was pissed, I AM pissed, I…” you struggled to form a coherent sentence .“I trusted you, besides Sirius warning, I trusted you because it was what my gut told me to do and then… then I thought you had betrayed us and I was pissed, I was pissed at you, at my parents at your parents, at Sirius who didn’t admit it was my idea and…” you sucked in a breath, “I was pissed with myself, for being foolish enough to trust you.”

“I’m sorry…”

You shook your head, taking a step closer, the urge to comfort him almost taking over, “No Reg… It’s me, I AM sorry, for not giving you a chance to–” You remembered the train, the race, the other times Regulus had tried to approach you and you had either ignored him or scowled at him to scare him away “–And you tried so many times.”

He laughed at himself, “I’ve been told I’m rather stubborn.”

You let out a breathy laugh. “Reminds me of someone.”

“Will you…” He hesitated, “Will you tell Sirius?” he asked, a mix of frightened and hopeful.

You nodded, “He needs to know, he’s… resentful.”

Regulus swallowed, another one of those expressions you had seen your boyfriend do, his eyes were still red, his breath was heavy and he looked like he was about to burst into a panic attack, you took another step towards him, reaching your hand to grab onto his arm before you stopped yourself. “Do you mind it if I–” you started, “can I hug you?”

He turned to you, a little shocked at your request, Regulus looked like he desperately needed a hug, you weren’t sure if your hug was the one he needed, but you hoped you could comfort him, if only to take back a little bit of the evil you had done to him, even if it was under the wrong belief.

Eventually, he nodded and you leaned closer, wrapping your arms around him, he was taller than you, unlike when you’d met, shorter than Sirius, but taller than you regardless. “I’m sorry,” you whispered, “for being a piece of shit.”

“You didn’t know.”

“I should have known. I just needed someone to blame and then Sirius–”

“It’s fine now,” he said with a smile. You don’t hate me anymore. Regulus seemed to relax as you rubbed your hand on his back, trying to comfort him as best as you could, and then he pulled back. “You have a party to attend to,” he told you, motioning to the side. “You were brilliant today.”

You smiled, “Bullshit, I pretended to know where the snitch was just to get Barty off Gale’s back.”

“And you fooled him,” he added with a bit of a smile. “That’s no easy feat.”

You shrugged, “You certainly helped.”

“That’s what friends are for.”

You swallowed. “Did you… did you let me win?” you asked with a frown.

He looked at you, eyebrows raised, “I would never let you win!” he said disdainfully, a whisper of the disagreeable Reggie you had met at the park. “It wouldn’t be fair to you.”

You nodded, a small smile playing on your lips. “So that means I won fair and square.”

“You jumped off your fucking broom to get the snitch, of course, you won fair and square.”

You shrugged, “I knew I had the swamp marble, and I was gonna fall off the broom anyway.”

He clenched his jaw, “Fucking Barty.”

“I can deal with him, don’t keep messing around or you’ll end up with a shaved head or something one day.” He placed a hand on his hair, looking slightly panicked and you laughed. “You’re so much like Sirius is ridiculous.”

He frowned at that. “Just go to your party.”

You smiled again, holding a laugh as you turned around, deciding not to tease him further, but you turned back to him “Hey Reg… Will you be alright?”

He looked at you and nodded. “I’ve got you as an ally now, of course, I’ll be alright.”

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A/N: You guys, I had some people asking me about Reggie for a while and I did mention that eventually things would be fixed up between him and the reader, didn't I? I know it took a while but it was sooo satisfying to write this one, and I've been wanting to see your reactions since I wrote it a few weeks ago, I really hope you enjoyed it <;3 Reggie deserves all the love!

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bu-blegh-ost · 9 months

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A short essay about how Caspian is mathematically not a mole (ep. 115 spoilers) (and for the whole series for that matter)

Okay, alright guys, I saw your concerns. I saw it all, and you are right to be worried that your favourite blue wet man's blue and equally wet best friend may turn out to be a traitor. And so am I, trust me. Which is why I went through every single bit of Caspian's past I could dig out to create an unltimate timeline of his entire goddamn life to see it it'd be plausible for him to become a mole at any point in time and ultimately prove his innocence! If that's something you're interested in reading, then buckle up!

"Jay, you come from a division of soliders that were purposely put to infiltrate pirate crews, especially the new and upcoming ones. This is totally seperate from the Black-Ops situation that you learned about in the Stronghold. And you, in this book, can tell that there is a plant on Lizzie's crew."

This, of course is something I need to point out first. Whoever Lizzie's mole might be, they are not a doppelganger. They are not a clone, or Black-Ops, just a solider of the Navy, a person that must have gotten into the Navy via regular recruitment, be trained by them and then put into a spy division. Jay ofc had this entire process sped up, due to her grandma's influence, but no one other than her, especially an Undersea citizen, who would probably have to put in extra effort to be trusted given their shaky political situation few years back, would get the same treatment. What I'm trying to say, Caspian would need time, at least few years of training to become a mole they'd trust to infiltrate a crew, and not just any crew might I add. More on that later. Let's go back to his most early years for now. This is a fragment of episode 84 in which Caspian talks to Gillion abt his early life:

C: We all have family. I consider my life up here, this crew to be my found family. But my previous…tribe with the water genasi in the Undersea, where I was growing up…sort of in a [illegible]... remember me telling you about the outskirts? We um…was very nomadic, quite a, quite a peaceful, tranquil life, but it was always, you know…mixed with this life of poverty and my family wasn’t very…wouldn’t really have much but the water around us, and each other, I suppose, so uh…You know...I mean my mother didn’t make it past old age, and uh…

G: I’m sorry…

C: When my sister left the tribe, my father sort of fell into a depression of sorts and he stopped moving around. And when we stayed in one place, I was 18 or so, maybe 16, it was a while ago, and then…that’s when I left as well. Ventured to the Oversea, and um…and it’s history, so that’s my family. Not sure what they’re up to these days, I mean…I know my sister went to the capital, where you were.

G: Pirating is a pretty lucrative business, maybe if…we managed to find them or run into them, we can give something back, put them in a better situation.

C: …Well um…I mean this was 10-15, 10 to 12 to 15 years ago, quite some, quite some time, so I don’t even know if my father is alive still, I mean I don’t really have the desire to go back to the undersea, Gill.

G: Wha-why not?

C: Because I like my life up here. This is where I’m happy.

So, before we go to what all of that entails, one more quick crazy thing to mention: so, Caspian's sister is an Elder of the Undersea. Like for sure. This is confirmed by this part from ep. 79:

The Triton who you remember as the Elder Odolaf, who looks like he is about to speak, but is cut off by the water genasi, who has been doing a lot of talking thus far, who is Elder Celeste. They stand up and there is a familiarity that you notice now in their face. It’s like you have met them before, but not in the way that you know them because they are the Elder, but in a way that it’s like, they look like somebody you know. And she has sort of these uh, white tied-up like dreads that are tied up in like a bun and they come across the face and then one side is shaved. And there are beads and piercings in her hair, her ears are a little bit more sea elf-like in the way that they are pointed and they kind of like gradient into pink. They all kind of wear the same sort of ornate robes, though hers is more, I guess faded and like cut a bit, look a bit more warriorous, or like tribal, but still very well-made and professional.

Tribal clothing, a water genasi, that looks like someone Gillion saw before in the face. The only water genasi Gillion met after leaving the Undersea is Caspian. Elder Celeste is Caspian's sister. Wild. Anyway, not what we're here for, but I needed to mention that.

The crazier thing is that Caspian left to Oversea when he was 16-18, and it has been 10-15 years since then. That means Caspian is currently 26 at possible youngest, and 33 at his oldest, which was surprising to me, I did not imagine Caspian as a man in his 30s! But that's straight up facts, so holy shit, you know?

Okay, so I'm going to list a lot of small facts that determine a lot of ages in quick succession. I hope it's not gonna be too scary to look at, I'll simplify it all at the end. [Deep inhale]

Right now Gillion is 22. So when Caspian left the Undersea, Gillion was 12-7. Jay is 21 and Ava was 2 years older, same age as Lizzie. So Lizzie is 23 now. When Caspian left the Undersea, she was 13-8. Chip is 19, so Lizzie is 4 years older. Hole in the Sea happened when Chip was 9, so Lizzie was 13. So Caspian left the Undersea around the same time Lizzie crashed on the uninhabited island with Chey after the Hole.

It's a lot, I know, I know. So let me clear this up a little.

Hole in the sea was 10 years ago. Chip was 9, Lizzie was 13. 10 years ago Caspian was in the age between 16 and 23, and he left the Undersea when he was 16 or 18. So roughly at the same time the Black Sea happened, Caspian came to the surface for the first time.

(also pls note that we are talking in estimates, casue in ep. 36 Lizzie says she was 11 when the hole happened, but in ep. 101 she says she was the same age as Ava which by the power of math would put her at 13. Either way, somewhere around that age)

After that, Lizzie spend some time on an uninhabited island with Chey, the Black Rose cook, who sacrificed herself for Liz, so she could survive and died shortly after. We do not know how much time passed, but I assume no longer than few months, and after that she was saved by Captain Shadowbeard where she met Caspian. They were a part of Shadowbeard's crew, Caspian saved her from the massacre where Shadowbeard was killed, and then Lizzie went on to create her own crew, Grandberry Pirates with Caspian never leaving her for a second since he met her. That means that the only time Caspian could have joined the Navy would be RIGHT after he came to the Oversea for the first time, roughly at the same time Lizzie was stranded on an island, and in that short period of time (between Lizzie's crash on the island and her being found by Shadowbeard) he would have to find the time to be trusted and accepted by Navy, get trained specifically for infiltration AND infiltrate not anyones BUT FUCKING SHADOWBEARD'S SHIP. Not a NEW crew. A crew of one of the most legendary pirates on the sea. Cause before Lizzie, Caspian was Sadowbeard's crew member, and since then he never stopped being a pirate, so if he was a solider, he would have had to be one before Shadowbeard. And remeber what Grizzly said in 115: "Jay, you come from a division of soliders that were purposely put to infiltrate pirate crews, especially the new and upcoming ones."

Shadowbeard was not new. Not upcoming. He was dangerous and Navy must have had the balls of steal to send a rookie solider, which Caspian would have been at that point in time, to infiltrate him. The numbers say it's impossible. Guys, the numbers! They don't add up!

Anyway, so basically Caspian could not be a mole. He is not a new pirate, he was not a member of a fresh crew, becaue his pirate journey did not start with Lizzy, it started with Shadowbeard. Grandberry Pirates is a new crew, but Caspian is not a newbie in it. You know who is? Rudith. I mean what kind of doctor lets a bunch of rowdy pirates have a secret base under a place where sick and vulnerable rest??? Like ANY other place would have been better and more respectful! Also you know what's interesting? Gillion could heal these people with lay on hands easily, and yet the only thing Rudith did for them was give them potions that didn't seem to help and look after them on purely non-medical level. Bro didn't do shit. Like, why would you even become a doctor without having access to healing magic? The answer, you are not. You are a Navy solider in disguise.

Okay, okay, I'm done, that's all. If you got this far, you are a hero, thank you for reading this insanely long ramble, but that's kind of the conclusions that I came to, of course, any counter-theories and discussion in general is very much welcome! I'd love to hear your opinions! Love you guys, bye~

#jrwi riptide #just roll with it #jrwi #gillion jrwi #gillion tidestrider #caspian jrwi #jrwi caspian #elizabeth lafayette #lizzie jrwi #riptide spoilers #spoilers #jrwi spoilers

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idkmanwtfishumanityanymore · 2 months

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No I’m sorry Y’all I’m seriously still so fucking pissed off abt this episode, and I have to scream into the digital void about everything wrong with it and how downright mocking it felt or I’m gonna EXPLODE-

FIRST OFF, MY BIGGEST FUCKING ISSUE. Moon, near the end, says that “Bad people are bad people, no matter what dimension it is” or something similar.

HOW THE FUCK DOES SOLAR EXIST THEN, HM?

BECAUSE IF I REMEMBER CORRECTLY, SOLAR STARTED AS “NICE ECLIPSE”, BUT WAIT.. HOW CAN THAT BE POSSIBLE WHEN “BAD PEOPLE STAY BAD, NO MATTER THE DIMENSION”??? CAUSE I’M PRETTY FUCKING SURE ECLIPSE WAS BAD WHEN THAT HAPPENED, AND SOLAR WAS A GOOD VARIANT OF ECLIPSE.

YOUR LOGIC FALLS COMPLETELY, FUCKING, FLAT.

IF SOLAR, A GOOD ECLIPSE CAN EXIST, WHY IS IT SOOOOOO FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE FOR A GOOD BLOODMOON TO EXIST? HM? ANSWER ME THAT, HYPOCRITE.

THE ONLY FUCKING REASON, THEY WERE EVEN CONSIDERED “GOOD”, WAS BECAUSE THEY DIDN’T KILL. SOMETHING THEY ORIGINALLY, HAD TO FUCKING DO OR ELSE THEIR INSATIABLE BLOODLUST, WHICH WAS HARDWIRED INTO THEM, WOULD FORCE THEM TO GO AND KILL BECAUSE IT WAS PAINFUL TO IGNORE IT.

AND DON’T EVEN FUCKING GET ME STARTED ON HOW DISRESPECTFUL THIS FELT TO ANYONE WHO WAS (REASONABLY) PISSED OFF ABOUT HOW BLOODMOON’S CHARACTER WAS HANDLED, AND THE PEOPLE WHO ACTUALLY HAD AN ATTACHMENT TO HIM???

THIS WAS THE DEFINITION OF “If I give you what you want, will you fuck off?”

THE WRITERS, (probably fucking Davis), JUST TOSSED SOMETHING BLOODMOON RELATED AT THE FANDOM, TO GET US TO STOP CRITICIZING HOW HORRIBLY THEY HANDLED BLOODMOON AS A CHARACTER.

THEY JUST CHUCKED IT AT US, AND BASICALLY SAID; “Fuck off already, look, they can NEVER be actually good, they’ll always be bad, now stop whining”.

WE LITERALLY SAW THAT THEY COULD BE ATLEAST DOCILE-ISH IN A WAY, BACK WHEN THEY VERY BRIEFLY LIVED WITH FOXY AND FC. FOXY THOUGHT OF A WAY TO KEEP THEIR BLOODLUST AT BAY, THEY HAD ENTERTAINMENT IN THE FORM OF THE BOUNCY CHICK, AND THEY ACTUALLY SEEMED KINDA OKAY WITH LIVING THERE.

BUT NOOOOOOOO, THE FUCKING WRITERS GAVE US A GLIMPSE OF WHAT A VAST MAJORITY OF THE FANDOM WANTED, AND IMMEDIATELY RIPPED IT AWAY LIKE 3 OR 2 DAYS LATER BY HAVING THEM BOTH ABRUPTLY GO AFTER FOXY, AND HARVEST GOT FUCKING KILLED.

THEY WERE FUCKING DEPENDENT ON EACHOTHER TO SURVIVE AND FUNCTION, THEY WERE LITERALLY EACHOTHER’S OTHER HALF. WE CAN CLEARLY SEE THIS WHEN BLOODMOON IS STRUGGLING WITH PLANNING AND CALCUTION, BECAUSE THE OTHER TWIN HANDLED IT. THE OTHER TWIN KNEW HOW TO PLAN, AND CALCULATE SHIT FOR THEIR PLANS, THE REMAINING TWIN WAS THE BRAWN, AND THE OTHER WAS THE BRAIN IN SIMPLE TERMS.

AND DOUBLE DON’T GET ME STARTED ON HOW BLOODMOON WAS LITERALLY HARASSED AFTER HIS BROTHER WAS KILLED???

MONTY AND PUPPET, BOTH, FORCED BLOODMOON TO SIT ON THEIR STUPID LITTLE FUCKING PODCAST, AND PROBED HIM WITH ENDLESS QUESTIONS ABOUT HIS BROTHER.

FOR FUCKS SAKE, MONTY’S FIRST WORDS AFTER THE TIMESKIP WERE “How’s it feel bein’ an only sibling?” OR SOMETHING INCREDIBLY SIMILAR, AND YES, I’LL GIVE PUPPET SOME CREDIT, SHE SEEMED A TINY BIT DISAPPOINTED WITH MONTY FOR OPENING WITH THAT, BUT LIKE 5 OR SO MINUTES LATER, SHE WAS PLAYING THE FUCKING DEATH OF BLOODMOON’S BROTHER, ON FUCKING LOOP, AND EXPECTED HIM TO WATCH.

AND THEN THEY HAVE THE GALL TO CALL THEIR COMMUNITY, ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS THEY CAN EVEN HAVE SUCCESS FROM THEIR CHANNELS, CRAZY, FOR THINKING THAT THEY WENT TOO FAR, AND HAVING EVEN THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF SYMPATHY OR EMPATHY FOR BLOODMOON.

THEY CLAIM WE’RE INSANE FOR HAVING BASIC HUMAN REACTIONS TO SEEING SOMEONE LOSE A LOVED ONE.

THEY CLAIM WE’RE MENTALLY UNSTABLE FOR SYMPATHIZING WITH THE TWINS AND THEIR TRAUMA, WHICH MIGHT I ADD IS NEVER FUCKING ACKNOWLEDGED??

IF ECLIPSE IS ABLE TO HAVE A REDEMPTION ARC, BECAUSE HE’S “NOT THE SAME PERSON”, AND “A CLONE”, WHY IS IT SO IMPOSSIBLE THAT THE TWINS, WHO ALSO WEREN’T THE SAME PEOPLE, AND WERE ALSO CLONES, TO BE EVEN SLIGHTLY REDEEMED??

I DON’T FUCKING CARE IF THEY WERE STILL KILLERS, IT WAS STILL HARDWIRED INTO THEM, IN BOTH ITERATIONS.

I’m not going to touch how predatory Ruin was with them back in October right now, or ever, because I’m honestly appalled that the writers WENT THERE with their script.

Every fucking argument made in this stupid fucking mockery of a video falls flat, and directly conflicts with past fully canon information, and I’m fucking pissed.

on a lighter note, more (JUSTIFIED) complaints about the loan-shark!twins;

OKAY WHY THE FUCK DID THEY SEPARATE THEM INTO “BLOOD” AND “MOON”, COULDN’T THEY HAVE ATLEAST TRIED TO CONNECT WITH THEIR COMMUNITY AND USE ONE OF THE MANY RENAMES WE’VE HAD? BLOODY AND HARVEST, SYTHE AND HATCHET, CRIMSON AND MAROON TO NAME A FEW, BUT “BLOOD” AND “MOON”??? GOD HOW FUCKING DISCONNECTED CAN THEY BE?? THERE’S ALSO ALREADY A MOON THAT EXISTS, SO HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT WORK? HOW CONFUSING DOES IT GET WHEN THEY’RE IN THE SAME ROOM AND SOMEONE SAYS “MOON”, BUT ONLY MEANS ONE OF THEM???

And then the sheer fact that they were literally traumatized by the thought of drinking blood- like I’m sorry but that is NOT enough to traumatize anyone, unless they have like, a crippling phobia of blood. Hemophobia or something like that I think. And considering they say they “bleed people dry” (financially), I don’t think they have a fear of blood, or they wouldn’t use the saying-

So there ya have it, me, in the dark, at 10:33PM on a Friday night in July, on the 26th, writing a whole ass essay assignment because of how PISSED OFF one single episode made me.

I’m gonna go die now. (For legal reasons I mean go to bed /Gen)

#tsams bloodmoon #sun and moon show #sun and moon show spoilers #sun and moon show bloodmoon #rant #SAMS BloodMoon #bloodmoon twins #brite stfu #BloodMoon defender #proud BloodMoon supporter #TW// Implied S/A #in a way.#I’m talking about what happened with Ruin btw.

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olderthannetfic · 8 months

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Re incest wank

There was an episode of New Amsterdam (which was a pretty decent medical procedural for the first couple of seasons), where a psychiatrist counsels a young straight couple who've just found out that they are related. Half-siblings from the same sperm donor or something. Not planning on kids. Madly in love but understandably freaked out. IIRC the episode ends with them staying together.

I thought it was very well done and in line with the politics of the show, which is basically "How do you stay true to your idealist progressive values and still get anything done: the doctor edition."

However, people online seemed to disagree, and the episode was labeled controversial and dangerous for trying to normalize incest. Which is just crazy to me.

For one thing, I'm fairly certain I've seen this plot before. For another, it's obviously a classic thought experiment: remove the things that are the reasons for taboo: the genetic risk (which I agree with a previous anon about it being basically eugenics) and the potential for abusive family dynamics (these two people didn't grow up together or even in the same extended family) and ask yourself if it's still wrong.

My progressive values tell me that in this case, who cares? But apparently people do care because it sends a signal to the society that incest is a-okay yadda yadda. And to that I say, do you really think that there are many people out there who would boink their siblings if not for the taboo? Seriously?

Yeesh. People are fucking stupid about this. With the increasing use of sperm banks and the number of dudes who donate widely without disclosing (a rising problem that is often against regulations but happens anyway), we're going to see more RL cases like this. People need to stop acting like their squick matters when all of the social aspects have been removed and it's just an accident of genetics.

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lover-of-mine · 5 months

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Okay, I have been desperately trying to figure out what the blue and yellow means, right? I have been driving myself crazy.

And the other day I saw an edit and I was like "I'm stupid, I'm looking in the wrong place" but I didn't have the time to check this theory until earlier today, and now I'm losing my mind. So for this one, I'm gonna use the fact that they are using the sun on a wall and that they completed the blue and green with Buck and Eddie at the gym scene with the bottle and the towel to assume I am right, and they complete these things with other elements of the scene, wall, decoration, everything.

Okay, so, when tracking the blue and green thing so I could make this post, I kept wondering why there aren't a lot of Henren examples of it, this season has given us a few more examples, but I'm pretty sure there are only these 2 examples before season 7. But like, I didn't think much of it even though I didn't understand why.

But Anna, I thought this was about the blue and yellow, why you talking about the blue and green? Well, I think the blue and yellow is the blue and green for queer couples. Stay with me, I promise I have enough proof to create a reasonable doubt lol.

Okay, so, the other day I saw a henren edit that had their first date and I already had the yellow behind Eddie in my mind and was like, that's interesting, their first date is blue and yellow. So I had that in my head.

Then, someone is making a Karen in every episode series, and I saw a set of her in yellow and was like "wait, I need to stop looking for answers in the straight couples, buddie is a queer couple, I need to see if this is a pattern that has already been established for the other queer couple, do henren have different rules?" and yes, I think they do.

Going back to the blue and green thing for a second, the easiest couple to track the blue and green is madney. Every couple has worn blue and green, but they have been blue and green since their first scene. And while they do wear blue and green for inconsequential scenes, they are in blue and green for things like getting back together in season 6, finding out Jee is a girl, the date after Doug, the hospital after Doug, the whole Boston episode is blue and green in nature, I talk about that in more detail in my blue and green meta if you're interested.

So, assuming they are establishing the blue and yellow with henren in the same way they do the blue and green with madney, blue and yellow in important henren scenes sounded like a nice bet since the blue and yellow is present on their first date, right? And the same way Boston is inherently blue and green, tomorrow is very blue and yellow.

But you don't really think I'm telling you I established a pattern with only one episode, right? Using other elements of the scene, considering the way they are using the sun a lot with buddie, I have quite a few examples, going back down to when they accept that the IVF didn't work and that they'll be okay. I also really like the way the club in fomo is lit in blue and yellow.

But Anna, you are using the wall a lot. Yes, I am using the wall a lot. Why am I using the wall a lot? You know how madney is the guide for the blue and green? Their house is blue and green. Like decorations and stuff. Mostly the kitchen, but still. The detailing there, the pans, the blue chairs, the blue couch. Even Jee's room is greenish.

So, henren's house being yellow works, I think.

Another point towards that is the way that Buck's bi awakening is blue and yellow.

So, I'm gonna go insane and say the blue and yellow thing is the blue and green thing but queer.

But, looking at that and knowing that we are using other elements of the scene, buddie gets interesting. The earliest example I can find with henren is in 3x04 when they are discussing the IVF.

So I'm not gonna look before that BUT let's look after just for fun? So, I talked about the blue and green aspects of the grocery store scene, it's is also yellow, mostly behind Buck, there are yellow flowers on that bouquet next to Eddie. This one is a real stretch tho, I will admit that lol

Is this one a stretch? Maybe, less of a stretch than the grocery store tho.

I like this one, the summer camp scene with this interpretation. And the blue chair, and the building back there.

This one, I need to add this because of the oven and the light behind Eddie, but I admit, it's a stretch, but everything here is a stretch so lol

Poker date tho? We're getting closer lol even more when they are getting their winnings and Buck takes the red jacket off.

Also, the beer, they usually drink the genuine beer, that's yellow, and the coming out scene had a blue labeled beer.

BUT my question is actually about the will reveal. Because this scene is undoubtedly blue and yellow.

So, if I'm right, what does this mean for this scene? Because this scene looks like a love confession, sounds like a love confession, AND was talked about as Eddie saying he loves Buck to the core. I have many questions now. But I will accept this so I can stop thinking about it.

Anyway, this is my current theory on the blue and yellow.

As always, if you read this, I love you 💜

#911 meta #911 #buddie thoughts #buddie #do i sound as crazy as i think? aoksapskpalspals #anyway #here #911 spoilers #sorta

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viquipo · 3 months

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No bc I'm so mad rn I usually post my rants on ig stories but I need the tumblrites to tell me if I'm crazy or what. Jwcc/ct spoilers WHATEVER

First of all I want to preface this by saying that this is just my opinion on the matter, I'm not saying your headcanons are "wrong" or whatever tf, it's a kids cartoon where they unironically use terms like "fam". You can play with the characters however you'd like.

That being said, this is why TO ME it does not makes sense for Ben to be anything other than gay. Again, if you think he's bi or straight or anything else that's cool. I'm also leaning towards the opinion that he does actually have a girlfriend. I don't think the shows gonna pull a 180 on it because, realistically, 2 queer characters is already a lot for a DreamWorks kids show. As much as I'd like it not to be.

But, since the beginning, Ben has been very clearly coded as exclusively into men to me. Before finally going into it, I remind everyone on here that I'm a lesbian. I have felt an affinity with his character specifically for the experience of only liking the same gender. I might be totally projecting.

Ok, so.

1. The arc Ben goes through during the show is yes, one of self discovery, but also one of self acceptance. He changes a lot from the start of s1, but he also comes to terms with stuff himself or other people didn't like about him. He doesn't throw the dork pouch away or tells Kenji to keep it, the first thing he does when he takes it back from Kenji is put on hand sanitizer. He is covered in dirt, he's not afraid of filth anymore, but he still does that action because it's part of who he is as a person. He also becomes very unashamed at the things he does. He went from being embarrassed of his carob bars to eating grubs in front of people who he knows think it's gross. He knows himself as he is and he accepts it. To me (and to lots of other people) this works very well as a gay metaphor, and pairs up pretty nicely with the whole "jungle boy? Jungle MAN" arc being a trans metaphor. But how does this make Ben uniquely into men?

Well, it doesn't. But I think this next one does.

2. Enter Yasmina. She's pretty, she's smart, athletic, funny, all that good stuff. I'm not saying that means every wlm character should automatically be into her, but it certainly helps. Now forgive me if I don't remember specific episodes/seasons, but we all remember that episode where Ben convinces himself that Yaz is in love with him for some reason. When he "rejects" her, he says : "I'm just now starting to find myself". That's cool, cause I'm pretty sure Ben's " finding himself " personality wise was over and done a couple of seasons ago. To me, that is a really good hint at him dealing with his gayness.

3. He's also the first person Yasmina talks to about her feelings for Sammy. Now, in this particular context, the options for Yaz to talk to were Darius, Brooklynn, or Ben. It would initially seem to make more sense for her to confide in Brooklynn, since the two of them are far closer than her and Ben, and it also wouldn't be the first time she brings up Sammy as a romantic interest for Yaz (see: everyone tweaking abt that one line back in like s2). So why does Yasmina, a very private and reserved person, choose Ben to talk to about her same sex crush? She has probably gathered from the previous conversation that Ben relates to her struggle in a unique way in which Brooklynn just can't. Ben seems very receptive of what Yaz is saying ("feelings, am I right?") and it seems like he REALLY gets where she's coming from.

4. This is one I don't see talked about a lot, and maybe it's just cause I'm too out of the loop with the fandom, but I want to examine it as well. It's when Ben decides to not actually stay on the island. Everyone (except Sammy) already knew he wasn't going to stay in the end, but still didn't force him out. I think this is especially clear in a line Darius says when they reunite on the boat that goes something like "you needed to figure it out on your own" *smile hand on shoulder combo*. No explanation needed I think

I am diagnosed with autism did you guys know what

#text post #rant post #ramblings #jwcc #jurassic world chaos theory #jurassic world camp cretaceous #jwct #ben pincus #headcanon #kiss my fat nuts #also ive lived in Italy my whole life and have never seen ben pincus girlfriend????#uhm that's weird #she lives in... Europe?#which could mean nothing

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xerith-42 · 6 months

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Why Blaze is MyStreet's Most Failed Character

Blame the big bang discord for this post, I wasn't gonna write it until those fucks encouraged me.

Anyways here's an entire essay about why Blaze is the most wasted character in the entirety of MyStreet and I will literally fight Jessica and Jason Bravura with my bare hands.

To get us started on our harrowing tale of wasted potential and the best improviser Jessica ever hired, we need to go back a little. Back to Phoenix Drop High Season 2. We won't stay here long, I promise, I hate it more than you can possibly know. But the single saving grace of this absolute mess of a season is ya boi, Blaze. Introduced in the 18th episode of the season, airing on April 12, 2017, with the airing of Phoenix Drop High Season 2 Episode 18, Blaze was a character who started his brief tenure series with a bang!

Literally dude showed up and the first thing he ever did on screen as a character in a piece of media we can engage with is throw someone out of a window. We do not know this mans name yet and he's already left a lasting impression. Sure throwing people out of a window is common in werewolf culture, which I don't care what you say that's objectively funny, but it is bold to start a characters entire introduction with that. Blaze comes out of the gate swinging before he's said a single line.

And then after introducing himself he throws a dead bird at Aphmau to show off his hunting skills?? Okay so he's just that fucking weird and overly enthusiastic about things I guess! That's amazing! MyStreet always shines when it just lets it's characters be fucking weird without making a big deal out of it or talking them down for it. Dottie even says that it's romantic which is again just a great showing of Blaze's enthusiasm and lack of what might appear to be common social decorum because of said enthusiasm.

This is all punctuated and brought to a hilarious breaking point when Blaze's final showing of why he should be the new top dog at his school is when the crazy mother fucker rips his shirt off to literally flex about how he's one of the hottest guys in the school. And I'm going to be real with you, given Blaze's later characterization as a himbo, I'm pretty sure he doesn't actually care about this. He just says it because he thinks it'll boost his chances. Blaze is later shown to be a character willing to throw away his reputation for the things he cares about, but he does get a rather sincere moment with Aphmau, even if she's blushing the entire time.

It shows that Blaze is not only physically affectionate, but also weirdly comfortable with his shirt off. Because this is purely objective character analysis I will not be shoving my Blaze is autistic and has sensory problems with things touching his chest propaganda down your throats, but now that I've mentioned it once you won't stop thinking about it when this comes up.

The show admittedly fumbles the bag a little by having Blaze say in his internal monologue that he thinks Aphmau is cute and acts kind of like a tsundere, but this is Jesson writing so there's always bound to be a bit of That Shit. But in spite of that, Blaze is a character who has an instant impression that leaves a lot of room for comedy potential, and just good ol' fashion silliness. And while the werewolf plot of Season 2 is... bad, Blaze and the Werewolf Pups are stand out characters in the sense that their characterization leaves a lot of potential if they're in a different, better written story.

And even if the arc is bad, Blaze still is a quality part of it. His shallow but hilarious initial characterization gets built on in some really solid ways. Namely in how he acts as a force for good in Aphmau's life even if she doesn't realize or give him permission to do it. This entire season is about how the different men in Aphmau's life handle helping her in a crisis, and funnily enough, in a season centered around Aaron literally overthrowing Aphmau's new love interest, Blaze is the one who was consistently doing what was best for Aphmau.

Aaron fumbles the ball more than a few times, Ein is shown to be actively malicious, and Kai gets hate crimed. But Blaze, who's barely even a contender in this ship war, is constantly working to actually make things better while everyone else is pulling Aphmau away from what actively matters about her position. While Ein is manipulating her and Aaron is trying to prove that, Blaze throws caution to the wind and just does what he thinks is best to restore order.

But more important than that end conclusion is his true goal of standing up for Daniel. A wolf it is established he barely knew before this year, that Blaze is willing to throw his reputation and standing in a bull shit hierarchy because he's seeing how this hierarchy is hurting someone who doesn't deserve it. Blaze is the one who is baring his fangs and willing to throw hands when Daniel cowers away from bullies. By the end of the season Blaze has been given adequate screen time to not only show off his fun and maybe a tad out of touch side, but he's been given a real level of sincerity that's tied into the things he's enthusiastic about. He loves being a werewolf, and he extends that love to all the werewolves around him, until they start being dicks to other werewolves who are literally just sitting there.

At the center of Blaze is that inherent goofiness though. He's always cracking jokes, or the joke when he's on screen, and in a series that was originally pitched as a light hearted slice of life comedy in contrast to MCD's general misery, that sort of character is needed to keep the tone. Such is show in episode 22 when Blaze is reading a book on the Scientific Method to just learn more about science, but realizes the book is upside down.

But he actually understood it enough to properly apply the scientific method to this situation?? Iconic. It's played off as a joke of Blaze exploiting a loophole to get out of class, but even that's pretty smart honestly. Blaze may be a dumb ass but he's always willing to cheat an unfair system.

Episode 22 is basically a Blaze centric episode, which I did not expect, but now that I'm rewatching it for this post it might be the reason I love this character so dearly. It's not only the episode where Blaze manages to learn the Scientific Method upside down, but also stands up for Daniel in a really substantial way. Blaze is loud, enthusiastic, and strong, all traits that are celebrated by werewolf culture, and whether he realizes it or not, him just being around Daniel can do a lot to get bullies to back off. Everyone has seen Blaze toss a mother fucker through a window, they do not want to be on the receiving end of that.

He spends the rest of the episode trying to figure out what Ein's deal is when he hears that Ein went behind Aphmau's back on werewolf matters, landing Daniel in this situation. He hears Ein actively plotting against Daniel, but that is normal werewolf behavior. He concludes that he'll keep an eye on Ein. And this through line of "normal werewolf behavior" informs a lot of Blaze's decisions once he comes to the conclusion that Ein sucks and deserves to be undermined. He resorts to letting his actions speak louder than words and goes to violence after realizing that the wolves aren't listening to reason, they're listening to instinct.

He fights fire with fire, and while Aphmau might not approve, it's more effective than her soft rhetoric has been in getting people to be less of jackasses. This eventually lands him in hot water where he steps in for Daniel after Ein tries to get his goons to beat him up, and even if Blaze is fighting in a five v one, he still goes down swinging. And I'll say it, I think it's sweet that he calls Aaron after this happens. While it's clearly meant to be a thing of Blaze calling the last alpha because he's probably the only person who anyone will listen to, there's an important detail I think is easily overlooked.

He has Aaron's number.

He says he got it from the werewolf pups, but that means that Blaze went out of his way to make sure he could contact Aaron. He's the reason that Aaron even realizes Ein is playing all of them. Blaze is the catalyst for his undoing because unlike Aaron who's nearly imprisoned, heartbroken, and been hesitant to act in the plot as a result, Blaze doesn't actually care that much if Aphmau currently likes him because he's more worried about her physical and mental well being than whether she wants to kiss him or someone else.

How many Aphmau love interests can say that?

Can any of them say that?

Blaze can.

Blaze actually consistently shows a level of selflessness that's unfitting of how I've seen some people characterize him. He gives up his real chance to be Alpha because Daniel is so compassionate and earnest and genuinely deserves it. Blaze wants to believe in a future lead by people like Daniel and Aphmau where he might not have to keep fighting people to keep things sane. Blaze constantly gives up his pride, his power, his safety just to make sure that his friends are taken care of, or to effect real change in a school he's about to leave.

It wouldn't be long after Phoenix Drop High Season 2 ended that Blaze would make his debut in the main series My Street in the second episode of Season 5, airing only a few days after the end of Phoenix Drop High Season 2. Just like before he really shows up with a bang, literally throwing himself through the air between Lucinda and Kim just to catch a frisbee because Blaze is the most extra mother fucker ever, and then immediately proceeds to flirt with them. Iconic as ever. Short but sweet.

It's in episode 3 that it's revealed that Blaze and the werewolf pups kept Aaron company during his rehabilitation year. But from the way it's worded it sounds like Blaze was called in before anyone else by Aaron's parents. Based on the way they talked and actively planned together before, I wouldn't be surprised if Blaze was the first person who came to his mind when Aaron thought of a werewolf friend.

I think Aaron reached out to Blaze when he needed it.

And even though I've previously stated that I don't think Aaron's parents initially liked Blaze because by this era he's old enough to fully take on his persona as the cool stoner friend who's also a little insane in the most charming way possible, he has a good impact on Aaron. Aaron likes being around him, and maybe they smoke weed to help Aaron relieve some of the lasting pain when no one's looking.

Regardless of his methods, Blaze does an ultimate good in Aaron's life as a result of being there for him when he needed it. So much so that he was invited out to Starlight and is shown to be one of Aaron's main pillars of support. We are given scarcely little of this actual friendship, which is where the problem lies. While before Blaze was a surprisingly engaging part of an other wise terrible story, at least in season 5 the story is a lot slower and character focused. And Blaze can work in these moments, we saw him have real moments of sincerity before.

He gets some of it, but the issue is that Blaze isn't allowed to be alone anymore. The cast of MyStreet is huge, and Blaze is a character who is making his second major appearance, while some characters in the cast have been present since literally episode one. It's hard to justify giving him solo screen time when he's been in the series for such little time and we barely have enough time for certain significant characters to really have arcs (Lucinda). Most of Blaze's scenes are scenes with at least four other characters on screen, he's never allowed screen time without at least two other werewolf characters attached to him.

I don't object to Blaze hanging out with his friends, or even making new ones though out the season but... Would it kill the writers to let him have a scene with Aaron? Like. A single scene. Where it's just Blaze and Aaron. I mean just Blaze and Aaron without Aphmau there. They've done this before. They did it in the season Blaze showed up in. Just one scene where the two of them get to talk about literally anything would do so much. Even if they talk about Aphmau, it's better than nothing. It would strengthen both of their characters so much to be able to get a scene where they talk to each other not as conspirators who kinda know each other, but as real friends supporting one another.

Show that even though Blaze said Daniel was more compassionate than he was, Blaze still is a compassionate and even empathetic person. Show why Aaron was grateful to have him during his recovery. They have those scenes of Aaron at physical therapy, right? Why not have Blaze take him one time and just show how they interact then? The possibilities with this unrealized idea are endless, and that's genuinely upsetting. Opportunities like this present themselves every time Blaze makes an appearance, they even tease me by giving me scenes where Aaron is alone with a character he has little to no connection with, Maria.

Maria was a foil for Aphmau. And Ein was a foil for Aaron. And Blaze was a foil for Ein. There is no reason for Maria to really have a rapor that matters with Aaron. He doesn't really know her that well, she's clearly a friend by association, and it seems like an odd thing to focus on when Blaze is LITERALLY RIGHT THERE IN THE BACKGROUND OF THIS SCENE.

Why won't they let Blaze talk to Aaron? It's so infuriating. The closest we get is in episode 7 when Blaze attempts to calm down Aaron, but he's shown to be ineffective and it comes down to, of course, Aphmau being the one to talk him down. I swear to Hatsune the writers are making fun of me at this point. They're going "Oooooh you want Blaze to be an actually helpful and supportive figure in Aaron's life soooo bad." AND I DO!

I'm serious when I say the show is teasing me. I've been skimming through Season 5 and only watching the episodes when Blaze is on screen, and so far he has never been in a scene with less than 4 people in it. Never. And even in scenes where he gets to be at least a focal point, he's always limited because he has to share that moment in the spotlight with FOUR OTHER CHARACTERS.

Episode 14 is a great example of this. When the werewolf gang gets told they aren't allowed to eat at a restaurant because they're werewolves, Blaze makes it abundantly obvious that he's put up with this before and really doesn't feel like being hate crimed on his vacation. And he knows that actions speak louder than words and therefore joins Maria in saying they should "teach this establishment a lesson." Personally I think Blaze would've just thrown the manager through a window only to realize it's an outdoor establishment and throw him into the ocean. Which would be objectively funny and deserved because that owner was being cringe and racist.

I love the conversation that happens because it shows the unique way that Aaron sees things from passing as a human for most of his life. This has never happened, but he knows that further acts of violence as a result will only make it happen again. This is a great scene for Aaron. Not really good for Blaze, and the next scene makes him worse. I love the detail that Blaze is an instinctual person more than a planner, but it feels wrong that he doesn't even let Aaron consider planning. I know he wants Aaron to be more spontaneous but he should have more awareness of his friend and his habits and be able to accommodate it, not talk over it.

But it's Jesson, so misunderstanding even their simplest character is par for the course. At least episode 15 gives me Garroth and Blaze talking in the background, and I'm starved for good Blaze content, so I was eating this shit up. The problem with watching MyStreet this way is that Blaze... Just doesn't get a lot of moments... At all. There are some episodes where he doesn't even speak at all, and when he does get to talk in episodes, he gets a few lines in one giant ensemble scene.

I don't object to a show having an ensemble cast, or even a lot of characters with a few central ones, but it really is a detriment to the show that Aaron never gets a scene alone with any werewolf he isn't related to. Nana gets to talk to Blaze when she's having a crisis of her relationship history and experience, but it's just so Blaze can tell her the opposite of what she wants to hear. It's not a scene that feels like it was written for Blaze, because it wasn't. It was written for Nana.

And before some jack ass says it "Blaze is a side character he's not supposed to get a lot of focus" and I'm not asking for a lot. I watched every scene he's in in PDH to prove that it works

BECAUSE IT DID.

Blaze showed up officially in episode 18 out of 30, and he wasn't in every episode after his introduction. But the writers gave him a solid introduction, one good episode that spent most of its run time with him, and really good moments throughout the rest of his time in the series. All I'm asking is that Season 5 at least give me one of those things. Either a good episode where he and his relationship with Aaron is brought into focus, even if it's used as a vector to study Aaron's character, or just more sincere moments for him.

It feels like Blaze is a joke character now when he previously made it very clear he's far more than that.

And then they just forget about him. During the first part of the 3 part finale Blaze is there. He's the one who got everyone to gather at the docks because an mf wants to eat some scrumptious food. But when Aaron sees Ein and starts freaking out, Blaze is literally just not in the scene. At all. Not even as like a throwaway of someone who could've helped but failed, he just is not in the scene at all. It legitimately feels like the writers forgot about him entirely.

Blaze the minute the plot shows up:

He's there after Garroth gets turned and was apparently at Garroth's bedside trying to calm him down which I will be thinking about. A lot. I'll be thinking about how we deserved to see or at least hear some of it, about how the writers continue to tease me with an interesting scene that involves my favorite little fucker, about how heartbreaking it would have been to see Blaze and Melissa try to calm Garroth only for him to scream in pain and try to push them away only to reveal that Zane and Nana are able to hear the entire ordeal downstairs and Zane is panicking when he hears his brother screaming in pain. Just thinking about what we could've had if the writers actually cared about any of these characters.

And then after that he dies.

I'm not watching any of When Angels Fall because I know what's good for my health. I know what happens in Season 6 Episode 9 and that's all I need to know. It doesn't matter if the writers may have finally given Blaze an emotional scene, it doesn't matter if they finally gave him even a hint of character development, it doesn't matter if he made a connection in a real way. Because no matter what he did the result is the same. No matter what quality the writers might've pulled out of their ass, it would ultimately be in service of one end. From the start of this season these writers knew what they wanted to do. They wanted to up the stakes and add more drama to the show, and they wanted to do it by killing Blaze.

And I think I know why.

This is 100% a limited view, but I was on Aphmau Instagram at the time that this season was airing. And I ran a Blaze fan account. I talked to a lot of MyStreet fans during this time and I was constantly upset and disappointed that people didn't understand Blaze's character, or just didn't appreciate it as much as I do. Most people liked Blaze on a very surface level, or because he was attached to another character they liked. I found very few people who genuinely cared about him as an individual, probably because Blaze stopped getting scenes alone by the end of PDH, and because the Aphmau fandom (at the time) had more of a focus on shipping than character work and quality. Blaze was easily shippable with a number of characters, canonically shipped with Dottie a little, and had enough characterization that people cared about him, but not enough to get a large dedicated fanbase.

He was the perfect one to kill.

Enough people liked him because he was hard to hate, he was stapled onto Aaron's character with little regard for a story of his own, and his death could be eventually inconsequential. And it was! Blaze's method of dying is so bad it makes me physically angry!

I know the whole story for the last few seasons has been all about Forever Potions and turning people against each other, but just mind controlling Blaze and having him die while under mind control is such such a missed opportunity. There's been a disappointing lack of proper Aaron and Blaze friendship content, but they could have made up for it in this scene with just a few tweaks. Just have Blaze not be mind controlled at the end. He can still go on that rant about Aaron being the cause of all the bad that's happened, but then the words start to become... disjointed. Jilted. As if Blaze is struggling to say them because he knows that they're wrong. Aaron's his friend, there's no way he'd say that about him.

Have it break.

Have him look at his friend in a worse state than he's ever been in, and instead of approaching him with intent to harm, it's intent to heal. A final attempt at getting through to Aaron. And like the times before, it doesn't work. Aaron's angrier than ever and he isn't seeing or thinking straight thanks to Ein's bull shit. All he can see is an enemy in his way. Maybe he sees Blaze's eyes but Blaze's green eye is still Emerald Green, even if the control broke for a moment. Whatever reason, Aaron still attacks.

He doesn't realize that Blaze wasn't trying to hurt him until it's too late. Aaron's anger already ruined a friend's life, it already pulled all of them into the hell they're in, and now it's killed one of his best friends.

ONE CHANGE. THAT'S ALL IT TOOK. ONE SINGLE CHANGE TO MAKE BLAZE'S DEATH ACTUALLY MEAN SOMETHING.

Ideally I'd like it Blaze just didn't die at all, least of all before the finale, but if you're going to kill him off unceremoniously at least make it have some emotional weight. You've been neglecting him for an entire season and now you just kill him off? Just like that? Oh he gets to show up in heaven? How nice. Is it a scene where he gets to express regrets, remorse, or even give any insight into his feelings?

Of course it fucking isn't! Are you kidding me, that's not even close to what happens. I said i wouldn't watch When Angels Fall but

I LIED!!

I watched Blaze's death scene and his scene in heaven to make sure I knew well and good how badly they failed to kill off my favorite character! And man, the scene in heaven is just the worst! Blaze does a genuinely kind thing for Aphmau and decides to stay with her when she's alone because he doesn't want her to hurt. He saw how much pain Aaron was in without her. He just wants to fucking help her.

But Aphmau's too self absorbed to realize that and instead goes on a whole rant about how she always needs other people to take care of or protect her and how everyone else would be better off yadda yadda. What she doesn't realize and what Blaze eventually gets to tell her is that people were around her and took care of her because they just wanted to. Because she was nice to be around. And they never expected anything else, and never saw her as a burden.

And that's actually a really nice moment. Sort of. There's two major problems. First, Blaze gets cut off from telling Aphmau this at first because Irene has to go on a whole rant about Aphmau being selfish. And she is right in everything that she says, but it feels weird for Irene, who literally doesn't know her, to be making this judgement. This scene should have been Irene observing a conversation between Blaze and Aphmau were Blaze just tries to make her feel better.

And that would hopefully solve problem number two. Which is that what Blaze says is very genuine and heartfelt, but severely handicapped by the fact that he and Aphmau were only friends for a short period of time in High School, and an equally short period of time within the last few months. What Blaze says about why he likes being around her is true, but it would have a lot more weight if there was a chance for Blaze to have been around her as a friend more.

Fuck it, if you need Blaze to be on screen with at least two other characters, why was there never a scene of Blaze, Aaron and Aphmau just talking? Would a single scene of that fucking killed you? Just one scene would have made their friendships a lot more solid and therefore heartbreaking to lose when it gets torn apart.

Third problem, the scene ends with a focus on Irene. Blaze's words echo in her ears, and remind her of her friends. And I like that idea because I'm an absolute sucker for MCD, but it takes the scene away from the focus. This should be a scene about one of Aphmau's friends encouraging her to not give up even if it all seems lost. At least don't let her death be in vain by saying such awful things about her friends while they may be grieving. But Irene is brought into focus again because the show isn't about Blaze, or Aphmau apparently, I guess her Aphmau Main Character Powers overrides Aphmau's. She has more experience with them.

Blaze and Aphmau's very heartfelt dialogue is brought down by the fact that these two characters lives didn't intersect very directly out of high school. Through the course of Season 5 I never got the idea that Blaze was Aphmau's friend. Not to say they weren't friendly, I think Blaze adored her just as much as he did in high school, but as a viewer I was never shown that they cared particularly for one another. I believe that Blaze sincerely cared about her even after all this time, but that's not because of anything the writers did with him in these seasons. It's just because that's the kind of person Blaze is.

But their friendship not being strong really weakens the scene. This is a scene that I know for a fact worked as intended when I watched it as it was coming out. I was an overemotional mess of a 15 year old who hated how this series was going but kept watching it because it was almost over and I might as well get it done with. It pulled on my heartstrings and they sang and I cried. I cried a lot. This scene made me incredibly emotional, and it still got to me as an adult, but the devil is in the details.

Blaze and his arc might work on the surface. They work if you don't pay that close of attention to it. They work if you care more about the characters he's constantly around more than Blaze. And when I first watched Seasons 5&6, I still had a very deep attachment to a lot of these characters, especially Melissa, who he shares a lot of scenes with. So I felt... satisfied? I would've liked more, but I probably wouldn't have complained about what I got (his death scene not withstanding I always thought that was bad).

My my, how the times have changed.

If it wasn't obvious from the four thousand or so words you just read, Blaze is a rather unique case of these writers failing as writers. A rather unique case where the perfect character to fix a lot of problems with their show practically jumped up in the air waving his arms around and they still brushed past him to focus on a predetermined story he was shoved into. I don't think the writers ever really had a plan for where Blaze would go or what he would do.

A lot of Blaze's best character moments are when he isn't being written by Jesson. The reason I love the minigames so much is because there, Blaze's incredibly talented voice actor Jason Lord is actually really funny and pretty good at improv. Obviously some bits of the mini games are scripted, but a lot of them are just seeing how much voice actors can get into their characters, which he's fantastic at. A lot of Blaze's funniest moments come from this too, which is great when the writers turn him into a comedy character but the characters voice actor is funnier than they both are and is only a funny character when they don't have direct control of him. Lord is able to bring life to a character who may have been lacking it due to the simultaneously focused and unfocused way the series was written.

Blaze is proof of what happens when writers don't bother to develop their characters beyond the outline. The draft notes for PDH Season 2 said "there's going to be a wolf character who tries to become Alpha and instead stands up for Daniel when he's bullied." and then Blaze was born. The writers gave him some characterization as a treat to make the story work better, and then were done with it then and there. We fleshed him out enough, good character, time to put him in season 5 so people stop criticizing us for not giving Aaron enough friends.

But the problem wasn't a lack of quantity in friends, it was a lack of quality. It was a lack of scenes that let Aaron interact with other characters without Aphmau present. It was a lack of characters to point to that were real emotional connections Aaron had that weren't his last minute family or his girlfriend. It was a lack of attention given to the few characters that could've filled that role. Dante almost filled it in season 2, and Aaron and Garroth could have arguably become closer after everything in season 4, but at that point Aaron's entire arc became centered around Aphmau.

It was the fact that Blaze was one of the few people who ever directly reached out to Aaron and then was never given a scene alone again. It was because the writers wrote too many characters, tried to give the series a more direct focus, and then failed to account for the characters that were dragged along even if they didn't necessarily know what to do with them.

So when Season 6 came around and they decided to make the show super serious no really stop laughing, they needed characters to kill off to up the stakes. It's not like Blaze's character was going anywhere. It's not like they had a plan for him. Nothing was really being lost.

It's not like Blaze was one of the most sincere and dedicated characters in the series. It's not like he had one of the biggest potentials in regards to his relationship with Aphmau or Aaron. It's not like there was time spent proving that he could be a solid pillar of support in both of their lives even under dire circumstances. It's not like he was set up that way through individual scenes where he got to talk to each of them on a personal level. That definitely didn't happen.

TLDR: MyStreet peaked at season 2 and they fumbled the bag with the best chance to make it peak even higher and I'm forever bitter about it. Now get out of my house.

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notfreetoday · 1 year

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MPW Ep 4 Subtitle Correction

Masterlist: EP 1 || EP 2 || EP 3

We have another change in director this episode, to Yasumura Emi, though the script is still being written by Funabiki Shinju (the director for Ep 3). This week's twitter space didn't have much info, so I won't be including it.

M: いや～瀬ケ崎さん強かったわ～ M: あの物腰で*マウンティングされて M: いっそ快感を覚えてしまった M: No but, Segasaki-san('s presence) was really strong M: The way he *asserted (his relationship with Yoh) like that M: (rather than being upset), I felt even more delighted! *This is a (rather unfortunate) loan word from English - "mount" or "mounting" 😅, in this case, pretty much means to "one-up" someone else, or to brag about something to another. If you do not wish to have a weird mental image in your head, please skip the next paragraph. This word appears to have morphed from the observation that monkeys, when trying to move up a rank in the chain of command, tend to jump on the back of another to assert their dominance (not scientist just translator also low-quality source don't keel me plz). - In other words, if I watch the Jp RAW MPW a full 8 hours before everyone else and spazz about it knowing full well no one else understands what was said then I'd totally be moun--- AHEM (sorry 😂)

What I mean to say is, in this episode, Segasaki all but screams "MINE" in the most thinly veiled, polite manner possible, so let's see how he does that. If you read nothing at all, the last scene with them cuddling has an important correction you should skip to. Same translation disclaimer applies, Ep 4, let's go~!

(I see a lot of people saying some of their thoughts/suspicions were confirmed in the tags of the previous posts, so feel free to chip in with what you think! MPW deserves more discussion!)

Sorry I am incapable of summarizing, the post is crazy long and I've hit the 30 image max. As such, not every scene will be screen capped and I won't be transcribing the original subs anymore...

Y: あ、いや、友達の漫画を手伝いに行ってきます (-masu form) Y: Ah, no. I am going to help a friend with their manga.

Yoh shifts up a speech level here, (he started the episode out speaking casually) using the -masu form to make an announcement -he's trying to emphasize his determination to go because he’s nervous about saying it.

S: はあ？どういうつもりで S: Huh? For what intention?

The "haa?" here has a more "excuse me?" feel, and the next line is interrogative - so all in all it has the same energy as: "Excuse me? What is going through your head?"

S: つぅか友達って誰だよ Y: よく通話してる…あの S: やっぱりあの女か S: Actually, when you say "friend", who do you mean? Y: The one who… I speak to a lot on the phone… S: So, it’s that woman after all huh?

S: だめ Y: え？なんで？(plain form) S: 俺が家にいんだから家にいろ (word contraction)* Y: でも約束したし (plain form) S: あの女には行けなくなったって言え* S: No. Y: Huh? Why? S: I'm staying at home so you stay at home* Y: But, I already made a promise S: Tell that woman that you can’t go any more** *This line, together with the starred line below, is extremely direct, (said in the same style as his not-proposal actually) and is clearly an order. **This line is literally "to that woman, say 'I am no longer able to make it'" (Though the speaker may not actually mean to use those exact words)

Segasaki has dropped a speech level here not so much by using "rude" forms but by being extremely blunt and direct. What he's saying implies he's being possessive of Yoh, but the way he says it also stresses his power in their relationship. But again, note that Yoh's replies are all in plain form - he hasn't shifted up a level in response, as he usually does when addressed so directly. In fact, the way he words his protest carries some indignation - using "し(shi)" at the end like this indicates that this "promise" is but one of the reasons he has for going - which is why Segasaki cuts him off. Yoh might sulk and pout about being ordered, he's still comfortably seated in his usual informal speech level, which means at this point he's still feeling secure about where he stands and definitely isn't intimidated.

S: お前さ*、何で自分がこの家にいるかわかってんの？ S: You*… do you even know why you’re in this house? *Here Segasaki uses the sentence-end particle "さ(sa)" after the word "you", which in this case has the same feel as "now look here". He also ends off his question with "の(no)", which can have many meanings, but here functions again as an assertive particle, implying that this is a rhetorical question, because he thinks Yoh should know the answer. Unfortunately, Yoh has the wrong answer 😅 (which Segasaki will realize and attempt to address in Ep 5)

Y: この人のやばさ*を一瞬でも忘れていた俺がバカだった Y: I was an idiot - to forget, even for a second, how insane* this person is *やばさ (yabasa) - this word comes from "yabai" and is a slang word that has evolved much like the words "crazy/insane" and "shit" have evolved in English - it can be used both positively and negatively to describe someone who's extreme, for eg "that guy is yabai (so cool!!)" vs "that guy is yabai (stay away)". Here, Yoh's referring to Segasaki as yabai for even thinking up this so called "slave contract" - which is what he assumes Segasaki is referring to.

Y: ごめん、いろいろあって Y: あ、いや、まあ、なんていうか、家にいろって言われ Y: あ、いや、なんでもない。とにかく本当にごめん Y: 今度なんかでお返しするから Y: Sorry, a lot happened Y: Ah, no, well, how do I say this... I was told "stay at home" Y: Ah, no, it's nothing. Anyway, I'm really sorry Y: I'll make it up to you next time, okay?

S: よくできました S: Well done. This is the same phrase we talked about in Ep 3, the stamp of approval. Again, Segasaki is emphasizing his role in relation to Yoh here.

Y: あの満足そうな後ろ姿 Y: 本当腹立つわ Y: That silhouette of his, so full of satisfaction as he leaves, Y: Really makes me irritated!* *Yoh ends off with the particle "わ (wa)", which mostly just emphasizes his emotion, but is a softer assertive particle than the ones Segasaki uses.

S: 夕飯、作ってくれてもいいんだぞ Y: はい Y: 俺はいつでも稼働する家事ロボットじゃねぇんだよ S: Dinner - it's fine for you to make it for me, you know Y: Yes Y: I'm not some housework robot that you can just activate at any time you know! The original subs made it sound like Segasaki was asking Yoh if he could make dinner, but that's not the case - he's literally telling Yoh to make it, and on top of that, he says it like he's doing Yoh a favour (by allowing him to make dinner) 🤣🤣 This time though, whether it's just cause Yoh's been caught by surprise or not, he answers properly with "Yes (Hai)".

Y: いっそロボットになってこの感情を無にしたい Y: (If it was going to be like this), I rather just become a robot, and turn these feelings into nothingness.

The focus of this line is mostly on Yoh preferring to become a robot in order to mute his feelings, but the sentence structure suggests that there is something to be inferred preceding this sentence, hence the bracketed bit. (It becomes clearer later on, especially in light of his monologue)

"Dayo-chan" is a pretty familiar nickname, something you'd expect a child to be called rather than an adult, unless it is a nickname between childhood friends. It implies a closeness/intimacy between the speaker/listener, hence the the look of horror on Yoh’s face (because he knows that is going to kick Segasaki into high gear) and the surprised disbelief (that someone would dare make a grab for Yoh) on Segasaki’s face. Kills me everytime 🤣

S: もしかして例の女か S: 家まで押し掛けるとはいい度胸してんな S: Don't tell me it's that woman from earlier? S: She's got some nerve, turning up at the house like this

Y: それはだめ　それだけは絶対だめ Y: No, not that, anything but that!

S: うれしいな　葉がいつもあなたの話をするので S: 一度お会いしてみたいと思っていたんです S: はじめまして、瀬ケ崎瑞貴といいます S: 葉がいつも　お世話になってます S: What a delight, Yoh speaks of you often so S: I've always thought it would be nice to be able to meet you. S: I'm Segasaki Mizuki, pleased to make your acquaintance. S: Thank you for always taking care of Yoh.

This is like, textbook formalities🤣 Practically every statement is a "standard" greeting and is very polite (hence the weirdly stiff english translation) except Segasaki says it in a way that makes it clear he speaks for Yoh, that Yoh is part of his in-group. (Legit, might as well plant a flag in the soil that says "Yoh is mine".) He sounds exactly like how parents sound when they meet their child's teachers, or how a spouse/older family member might sound when meeting their loved ones' co-workers. This is how it comes across: What a delight, Yoh speaks of you often so I've always thought it would be nice to be able to meet you - Sounds distinctly familial. Implies Segasaki is close enough to Yoh that Yoh shares his thoughts with him often. Also shows that Yoh tells Segasaki about Man-san, rather than the other way round. I'm Segasaki Mizuki, pleased to make your acquaintance. - standard, formal greeting Thank you for always taking care of Yoh. - standard greeting, literally "Yoh is always in your care" - You usually say this (for yourself) when you thank your teacher/senior/boss/important client. So, when you say this for someone else, you are claiming this person as your family, or someone in your in-group (a close friend, or at work, a junior).

S: すみません　今朝　葉が体調をくずしてしまって S: 家でゆっくり休んだ方がいいんじゃないかって S: 僕が言い聞かせたん*です S: ご迷惑をおかけしてしまってしまってすみませんでした S: I apologize, this morning, Yoh wasn't feeling well so S: I convinced* him (not to go) saying, S: "wouldn't it be better to stay at home and rest properly?" S: I sincerely apologize for the trouble this has caused you. * 言い聞かせる (translated as convinced here) this word is usually used when someone of higher standing tells/explains something to a person of a lower standing, and carries the nuance that they've managed to get the latter to accept/agree with what they say. It can also be translated as "told/persuaded/instructed/warned/admonished", and used in sentences like "I warned the kids not to run" or "The teacher told the students lying was wrong" - so that might give you a better idea of what Segasaki is implying here. I've used "convinced" here rather than "instruct" because Segasaki is, in general, speaking very tactfully to Man-san - but his meaning is still clear to anyone paying attention - Segasaki has a big enough role in Yoh's life that he not only can apologize on behalf of Yoh for not being able to fulfill the promise to Man-san, he also has a big enough say that Yoh will listen to his decisions.

M: いや、あんたがダヨの体調不良を詫びるんか M: むっちゃ身内面*するやん M: Wait, you are apologizing for Yoh being unwell (and unable to come help)? M: Isn't that a super intimate* (gesture)? *身内面する is literally "to show one's inner-circle face/side", ie the side of you that you show to your inner-circle/in-group ie your family. Hence this line reads more like "Wait, you're apologizing for Yoh?? Who are you, his family??"

Because of the emphasis on group identity in Japan, it's very common to apologize/take responsibility for the actions of another group-member, even if you had nothing to do with it. So here, Man-san has picked up on what Segasaki has been implying since the beginning - that Yoh is part of his in-group, and a very close one at that.

S: お茶目な方なんですね S: You've got such a sweet and funny personality, don't you? The word Segasaki uses here describes a person who tends to be naturally sweet and lovable, maybe a little silly but without any ulterior motive. It's a compliment in most situations - which is why Man-san gets all embarrassed - but can sometimes come across as slightly patronizing, like how calling someone "naive" can. Note that Segasaki is still being very polite here and effectively holding Man-san at arm's length, despite the seemingly friendly/open dialogue.

S: だから　そう言っていただけると　うれしいです S: So, to hear such nice words from you, makes me really glad.

S: ところで　可奈美さんはどこで　葉と　お知り合いに？ S: By the way, how did Kanami-san come to be friends with Yoh?

The whole dialogue where Segasaki responds to Man-san's fangirling basically sounds like how an idol would speak to their fans - it's very polite and uses deferential/humble verb forms to further indicate gratitude for the support, because Segasaki is answering Man-san in the context of his work. When he asks about Yoh, he switches back down to a normal speech level, but also uses her first name - Kanami-san, which whilst very charming, is totally NOT normal (with the sparkle effect and the wine, I can't help but get host club vibes from this lmao) because you only do that with people you are close to. Man-san is obviously flustered by this, and Yoh is understandably unhappy about the sudden familiarity Segasaki displays with Man-san (I personally think he's still trying to be disarmingly charming whilst he evaluates just how big a threat Man-san is🤣🤣)

S: ずいぶん飲んでると思ったら S: I thought he'd been drinking quite a bit

Again, this implies that Segasaki knows Yoh well enough to know his alcohol tolerance.

S: 寝るなら部屋いきな* S: If you're going to sleep, then go to the room alright? *いきな (ikina) - the "na" here is different from the sentence-final particle "na" we saw in Ep 3. This is short for "nasai", as in, "ikinasai", which is a polite but sharp way to say "please go (somewhere)". This sort of wording is most commonly used by parents towards young children when giving instructions like "please sit properly" or "please eat your food quietly". It's used between teachers/students, seniors/juniors etc, and sometimes amongst friends too. You absolutely should not use it with someone above you in the social hierarchy. The short version used here though, softens the tone a lot, and adds a very tender, homely feel to the sentence. Segasaki is literally coaxing Yoh to bed as a parent would a very young, sleepy but reluctant child.

M: 本当に恋人なんだなって感じです M: ようやく現実味が M: "(You two) are really a couple!" - that's the kind of feeling I get M: It's like it finally feels real

The way Segasaki literally puffs up with pride and hugs Yoh closer... (ಥ◡ಥ)

M: ダヨちゃんって彼氏の前だと　こんな甘えた*になるんですね M: なんかちょっと意外かも S: いやお酒様様ですね S: ふだんはそっけないですよ M: So Dayo-chan actually becomes so cute and affectionate* in front of his boyfriend M: I kind of didn't expect that, I think S: No, it's really all thanks to the sake S: Normally he's pretty indifferent *甘えた (amaeta) is the kansai dialect version of 甘える (amaeru), referring to the concept of amae.

Amae is a rather complex thing to explain in English and really deserves its own post. For simplicity's sake, what Man-san means here is that she's surprised that Yoh is actually able to express his desire to be treated affectionately and indulged in - something that requires a lot of trust in Segasaki and a willingness to be vulnerable in front of him.

M: おぉ、確かに。ダヨちゃん素直*じゃないからな M: あまのじゃく**っていうか　まあそういうとこあると　困っちゃいますよね M: Ohh, that's true. Cause Dayo-chan isn't able to be honest* with his feelings M: "Contrary"** is not really (the word to use) but... he does have a bit of that in him so.... (dealing with that) can be a bit of a handful don't you think? The way Man-san phrases her last line implies that she also has to deal with this side of Yoh, and by ending off with the particle "~ne", she is seeking Segasaki's agreement that they are both sort of in the same boat when it comes to that (she doesn't do this consciously though, which is why she freaks and apologizes later) *素直 (sunao - translated as honest here) is another term you'll often see when talking about feelings/relationships, and is also somewhat of a complex topic with many different possible translations, depending on context. It is closely related to amae, because in order to express your desire to be indulged or to receive affection, you first need to be able to admit to yourself that you want that.

**あまのじゃく (amanojaku - translated as contrary here) - this is a small demon from Japanese folklore, who was of an extremely contrary nature and would often mimic both humans and gods. It had the ability to see into one's heart and would then do the exact opposite of what one desired. Thus, this term is now used to describe people who intentionally go against the wishes of others, who are stubborn/unable to admit when they are wrong, or who twist themselves into a pickle/cannot be truthful about how they feel. It's not used in a complimentary way, which is why Man-san says Yoh's not quite like that, but there are some parts of him that do sort of fit the description.

S: やだな*　葉の素直になれないその不器用さが　余計にかわいいんじゃないですか S: ね？ S: That's not nice*... Yoh's inability to be truthful about his feelings - it's precisely that awkwardness that makes him even more adorable, isn't it? S: Wouldn't you say so? *Segasaki's first line "やだな (yada na - literally "this is unpleasant/I don't like that")" is not directed at Man-san, it's a form of soliloquy (which is common in Japanese), aka he's talking to himself here. We know this because it's informal and ends with the emphatic particle "~na". He then switches back to polite speech for the rest of his sentence, which is directed at Man-san. So, "that's not nice" is actually him remarking on the unpleasantness he feels after hearing Man-san describe Yoh as contrary, just as you might walk past a pile of rubbish on the street and remark, "well that's unsightly". Of course, the fact that he's actually saying this at a volume that Man-san can definitely hear and the way he sort of drawls it out, makes it clear that he definitely meant for her to know his disapproval behind the politeness of his following sentence (See what I mean by "thinly veiled politeness"?). On top of this, ending it off with a "ne?" (the same ending particle she used to seek his agreement) as he looks up right at her makes it clear - this whole sentence is a (mild) rebuke.

M: 分かったような口を利いてすんませんっした S: どうされました？ M: では私そろそろおいとまします M: I'm incredibly sorry! I spoke as if I knew everything (when in fact I knew nothing) S: What's the matter? M: Then, it is about time for me to take my leave. In response, Man-san ratches up the formal speech in both these sentences, though (as befitting her character) she pronounces it in a rather comical way (she sounds and acts like a samurai would in the movies 🤣). Also, don't mistake Segasaki's "what's the matter" as true confusion - his indirect rebuke was met with a direct (albeit over the top) apology - so here he is helping Man-san to save face, or recover the face she lost (by sounding presumptuous and by apologizing), by not calling attention to the actual apology. It is enough that she has recognized his superiority over her when it comes to understanding Yoh. This is also why later, when Man-san voluntarily offers up the information that she has a husband (and thus is not a threat to Segasaki's claim over Yoh), that Segasaki gives sort of an embarrassed but happy smile as he says "I'm sorry". That's not just "I'm sorry I can't send you to the station" (which is basic manners) but also has a little "I'm sorry for the unnecessary posturing over Yoh".

S: なんださっきから　やだ　ばっか言って S: お前はイヤイヤ期*か S: What's gotten into you? All you've been saying since just now is "no" S: Are you in your "no phase"*? *イヤイヤ期 - yes, the term he uses here specifically refers to the "no phase" of toddlers in their terrible twos. This isn't condescending though - Yoh's repeated "やだ (yada - "no" or "I don't want it")" is distinctly childlike, but this behaviour is precisely a form of amae that we talked about earlier. Yoh is asking to be indulged here, and Segasaki is responding both in word and in physical comfort.

Y: もうやだ S: だから何が Y: 俺　万さんのことすきなのに S: は？てめぇ* Y: あんたなんか嫌いだ Y: へらへらしてんじゃねぇよ Y: 何　ちゃっかり横に座ってんだよ Y: 名前で呼ぶ必要はねぇだろう Y: ふざけんな Y: 俺のこと好きなくせに Y: I don't want (this) anymore! S: So again I ask, (don't want) what? Y: I... even whilst... liking Man-san S: Ha? You little...* Y: I hate the likes of you Y: Don't freaking sit there laughing so carelessly Y: What were you doing taking the chance to sit next to her like that Y: There was no damn need to call her by her first name, right? Y: The hell are you doing! Y: When the person you like is me. When You talks about liking Man-san, he ends off with "なのに (nanoni)" which is used to show contrast the preceeding/following topic and to express frustration - except he hasn't mentioned the preceeding topic, so it isn't immediately clear what he means until he starts complaining about Segasaki's behaviour. That's why Segasaki is caught by surprise and follows up with an angry "haa?" and an emphatic *てめぇ(temee) - A very very rude way to say "you" which he first used in Ep 2 when Yoh said he was going to leave. It's not until later in Yoh's monologue, that we learn that he's upset that he feels jealousy/bad feelings towards Man-san because he's supposed to like Man-san (as a friend).

S: お前　お前それやだったんか S: お前の方が*　そう思ってたんかよ S: あ　もう最っ高 S: You... so that was what you didn't want? S: So, (all this time) it was actually you instead, who's been thinking like that? S: Oh, this is the. best.

S: よしよし S: 取られちゃって　やだったな S: There, there S: You didn't want me to be stolen away, did you?

Monologue time: Y: こんなふうに感じること自体が嫌だったんだ万さん相手に　友達なのに女々しすぎるって幼稚だろう　ダメだろうって　分かってるのに気付いたら頭ん中　ぐちゃぐちゃでどうしようもなくなってたあんたのせいだこんなふうに囁いたり微笑んだり優しく触れたりするからいつもあんな偉そうにああだ　こうだ命令してくるくせに突然まるで恋人*みたいに勘違いするだろこんなのもしかして好きってこんなみっともない気持ちのことなのか Y: The fact that I was feeling this way was specifically what I didn't like. (Feeling this way) towards Man-san, even though she's my friend... It was too petty (of me). Even though I knew, that it was childish, that I shouldn't (feel that way), Before I knew it, everything in my head was all messed up. And then I couldn't do anything about it. It's all your fault, Because you do things like this, Whispering softly to me, Smiling at me, And touching me so gently. Always so arrogantly ordering me around, Saying do this do that, and yet, You suddenly (start treating me) like a lover* Of course, I'd get the wrong idea with all of that! Could it be that, "Liking someone", Really is a feeling as unseemly and disgraceful as this? *恋人 (koibito - lover) - Lover in English can sometimes imply a more sexual than romantic relationship, but in Japanese "koibito" usually refers to "boyfriend/girlfriend" and may not imply a sexual component at all.

S: お前から抱きつくとかできんだな S: ずっと酔ってりゃいいのに S: So you actually can initiate hugs and stuff huh? S: If only you could stay drunk forever...

And we're done!! Ep 4 marks the turning point where Yoh begins the journey towards accepting and acknowledging his feelings - the concept of "sunao". It also clearly shows the preferred way these two reinforce their relationship - through "amae". Remember how in Ep 3, Yoh talked about how he felt that an "unspoken understanding" of each other's feelings was important in a relationship? Well, this is it - Yoh saying "no" and "don't want", or leaving the room to be by himself - these are all examples of amae. He doesn't want to ask for affection directly, because he can't. So he does it through amae instead, and as we can see, Segasaki really enjoys indulging in Yoh's unspoken requests for affection and gains fulfillment from that.

#my personal weatherman #taikan yohou #体感予報 #MPW subtitle corrections #mytranslations #segasaki x yoh #amae is a very important aspect of building connection in japanese relationships #as is the concept of sunao #these aren't concepts with easy direct translations to english #but they feature very heavily in this relationship #if you felt a little weirded out because their relationship sometimes can feel somewhat parental in nature #it's because the interdependence that results from amae is fundamentally different from the independence that is prized in the west

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