#but now my new blog is new and improved and changed lol

[misclogarts]

art in the queue:)

[pinkaditty]

Beauty (Twisted Wonderland, Rook Hunt)

tiptoes into blog again but steps on a comically placed whoopee cushion and alerts the entirety of my eagerly awaiting readers

hey hi hi sorry this is 2 let you all know that i am ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i had 2 disappear 2 focus entirely on my studies bc i was due 2 graduate with honors soon and i needed 2 have ALL my work completed lol! anyways, im glad 2 say that soon i will be the proud owner of an early bachelor’s degree in pre-med. this honors thesis better look STUNNING on my fucking resume. 

a/n: anyways YES im working on ur asks now that i have more free time yaaaaaaaaay!!! in the meantime enjoy this lol i wrote it entirely on a whim bc i saw the new rook card on twt and was like “hm. okay fine ass.” anyways let it be known i know VERY LITTLE about book 7 and Rook in general (ive seen spoilers but i don’t actively seek them out, plus i don't have the game anymore bc free palestine, fuck disney), so this might be ooc or an unusually placed scenario. please let me know how i can improve!

summary: rook’s back to his old self. he’s not sure of himself, but you have some choice words. 

cw: suggestive!!!!!!!! minors DNI!!!!!!!!!, book 7 spoilers i think, gn!reader (specifics of reader’s physical attributes are not mentioned, but Rook uses the masculine French word for "dear"), NOT PROOFREAD!!!!.

MINORS DNI AS PER USUAL THIS IS SUGGESTIVE!! THANK YOU FOR RESPECTING MY BOUNDARY!!!

“Well, I admit… the version of me you see standing before you, cher, was not me at my prime…”

You stare curiously at the man before you. Unmistakably, this was Rook. Same French accent, albeit with a harsher twang, same upturned green eyes, same haunting, knowing smile. It was Rook, without a doubt. But, he was different. He looked different. His uniform wasn’t Pomefiore- it was Savanaclaw. His hair was longer and wilder, choppy bangs and uneven waves falling in his face and along his back. His skin was darker, a light tan present on his usually pristine, pale skin. Freckles dotted the bridge of his nose and crest of his cheeks, and a smattering of them was found on his shoulders and neck. He didn’t stand quite as tall; rather, he stood with a slight slouch. Bending forward just slightly, piercing green eyes peering at you from beneath the shadow of  a wide-brim brown hat. Strangely, like this, he appeared considerably more predatory. 

Suddenly, him previously being in Savanaclaw made sense. 

However, this spurred a question in you. Not about his decision to change dorms, but about his words.

“What do you mean, not at your ‘prime’?”

You furrow your brows in confusion as you stare back at him, searching for answers. This Rook- with far more obvious muscle definition and hardened expressions- seemed quite at his fully-functioning peak. You step towards him, your eyes raking over his form, lingering at his rough, calloused hands on his hips, at his broad, freckle-covered chest, and at his perfect cupid’s bow, where a stray freckle laid. “Mon trickster,” he speaks, the sharp twang of his accent making you shiver. His lips rise into a knowing grin. Your eyes snap back up to his eyes, glued to you in irony. “It’s rude to stare.”

Your cheeks heat up only for a moment, but you wave him off. “Rook…” You start, giving him one more once over before glancing away again, not wanting to get too caught up in observing his proportions. “I don’t think this isn’t your prime. If anything…” You turn to him again, looking him in the eyes. You roll your bottom lip between your teeth before hurriedly spitting out the words before you could regret them. “...I think you’re beautiful.” 

You would expect Rook, of all people, to be unfazed by these words. However, he seems a bit taken aback, his eyes widening and his posture straightening, before he leans back forward again, his predatory smirk stretching wider across his face. “Merci, mon chéri, however, I do believe-”

“I mean it.” You quickly interrupt him, stopping him from beginning a self-depricating tirade of how unaccustomed he used to be to the concept of beauty. “I think you’re beautiful like this.” You face him head-on, your heart pounding loudly in your ears. This shouldn’t feel like confessing, but strangely, it does. 

Now it’s Rook’s turn to blush. His smile fades, his eyes going from knowing to gentle curiosity. The warm redness of the blush spreads across his tan cheeks, accentuating the darkness of his freckles. Something about that is endearing to you, and for a moment, you are emboldened. 

You step closer to him, to which he instinctively steps back, maintaining space while his senses are momentarily thrown off by his reaction to your praise. However, he doesn’t get to do that for long. He stumbles back into a stool, gripping onto its edge as he falls onto it, surprised. He would have known that was there, if not for your closeness and persistence. You move even closer, placing a knee between his thighs on the stool, boosting your height and leaning in to grab his face. He freezes, momentarily shocked by your bold actions, but he soon relaxes, his shoulders falling and his breathing returning to normal. He looks down, his eyes becoming hooded before he looks up at you again, his emerald gaze more alluring than before. He bites his lip before speaking, probably to distract you. Admittedly, it almost works. “Mon trickster…” He speaks again, and you wonder how anyone got used to hearing him speak, when such a harsh twang in a smooth accent contradicted so perfectly. He breathes shakily, a blush returning to his face. You deduced he was definitely trying to lure you in. “You’re being… awfully bold today. May I ask what’s brought this on-”

“Your imperfections are what makes your beauty!” You don’t shout, but you do raise your voice, ensuring his words are drowned out. Being this close to him makes you somewhat nervous, but you stand your ground, pressing your palms a little more into the flesh of his cheeks. He blinks at you confusedly, waiting for you to speak. You open your mouth to speak, but close it just as quickly, letting out a few false starts before sighing. You look away, taking a deep breath, before steeling yourself and facing him once more. Slowly, you let your eyes take in his face, until your gaze reaches his freckles, prominent against his tan skin. You find yourself stroking his freckles with your thumbs, gently tracing the nonsensical patterns in which they appear. You finally find your confidence again, and speak without thinking. “Your freckles and tan don’t tell me that you had bad or sensitive skin- they tell me that you loved the sun.” Your voice is so gentle it surprises yourself, not whispered, but low, and filled with a strange intimacy. 

His eyes widen at your words, his lips parted. He breathes shakily, but something about it is genuine this time. His eyes remain fixated on yours, his thick eyebrows downturned in a strange mix of melancholy and yearning. You stroke his face more, and he relaxes, closing his eyes and letting you hold him. You begin to breathe shakily yourself, your body flushing with heat and your fingers beginning to tremble just slightly. You move your right hand from his cheek to his hair, not once lifting your palm. Your fingers gently move through his hair, holding the back of his head, and he leans into your touch, exhaling as your pinky brushes the back of his neck. You lean in as well, following him as he follows your touch. He opens one eye to peer at you curiously, gauging your next action. When you gently pull at his waves, his eye snaps shut again, and he disguises a moan as a throaty exhale. You speak again, led purely by the spur of the moment. “Your uneven bangs and wild hair don’t tell me that you didn’t care for it- it tells me that you took the time to let it grow, and chose not to restrict what was yours.” You say this close to his neck, your lips gently brushing against the shell of his ear. He shivers, gripping the stool harder.

You begin to pull back, keeping your palms to his skin. You move your right hand back to his cheek, where your left hand still rests on his other one. You pause for a moment before drifting both hands downwards, your palms and fingers tickling his jaw and neck. He leans his head back to allow you access, sighing quietly at the feeling. You gently trail your palms and fingers down his neck before finally resting at the base. You then gently drag your hands to his shoulders and squeeze them, looking up at him. His blush still remains, and his lips are still parted, his breathing still shaky. He gazes at you expectantly, as though eagerly awaiting your next bit of praise. You lean towards his face and press your forehead to his, looking down at his shoulders. “Your slouch does not tell me that you had bad posture- it tells me that you were shyer, and didn’t take pride in your appearance.” You begin to trail your palms down his shoulders, your fingers feather-light on his skin in their wake. He shivers at the gentle stimulation, closing his eyes again. His breathing gets heavier and shakier, and you begin to feel heat pool within you once more. You pull your head back, straightening up as your stare at him. Leaning your face close to his, you continue to trail your palms down his arms, your fingers lightly pressing into his muscles, mapping out the structure of his body. Eventually you lift your palms, using only your fingers to trail down his forearm, tracing the insides of his wrists. He hardly flinches, likely expecting this, but still shivers at the sensation. “It also tells me…” You continue, your lips mere inches from his, but not daring to move any closer, staring at his cupid’s bow and blonde lashes. Your fingers reach his hands, and you gently pry them from their grip on the stool, moving them to his lap, palms up. You trace your fingers along his rough, calloused palms and fingers, making shapes and patterns. “...That you took more pride in the things you did with your hands.” You press your palms into his and his eyes flutter open, not surprised to find you mere inches from his face. He exhales, his blush deepening. He blinks at you, knowing you still weren’t finished yet. 

“Your imperfections lead me to your beauty. That’s why…” You trail off, lifting one hand from his palm and caressing his cheek once more. “...You’re beautiful.”

You begin to pull back, closing your eyes and quickly moving away, beginning to move your knee from between his thighs on the stool. However, he quickly grabs you, his fingers gripping the back of your uniform as he pulls you in. Your knee follows your movements, pushing into his inner thigh on the stool. He sharply inhales, looking down, before looking back up at you with hooded eyes. His eyes still look expectant, as though he still wants more.

“Mon trickster…” He says lowly, pulling you in further. Your knee presses harder against his inner thigh and your upper body closer towards his. He breathes shakily, moving one hand from the back of your uniform to the front, bunching some of it in his grasp. He tilts his head towards you, and you can feel his breath on your lips as your eyes lock with his. Heat flushes through your body again.

“Are there any other… imperfect beauties… that I possess, that you’d like to point out to me?”

rejoice! entertainment be upon ye!

a/n: okay but seriously, i hope u all enjoyed! i wrote this in like,, a few hours? for reference it is like. 5:45 am where i am as i type this LOLLLL! i was up lateee bc i no longer have schoolwork which meansss every spare second i have that im not working working, ill be doing these. anyways! please please pleeeeaaaasssseee leave a like, comment, and a reblog if u liked it! i love 2 know that u loved my work! ik its been a while but i promise 2 try 2 be more active… i swear!! oh, and leave an ask if u have any ideas about other things i should write!

[emersonfreepress]

help i'm alive

So! Long time, no see. 2023 was a whole goddamn lot lol

I don't have a demo update to share yet, but that's because I had to scrap nearly everything I managed to write during a very, very, very bad stint of writer's block last year. I hadn't even realized it had been a block like that until I went over my work so far last month and realized it was bad -- like, trust me; a slog to read that didn't even sound like me. It's been extremely frustrating but I've finally broken free of that and it's been easy and actually fun to write again for the first time in actual years. I just hate giving updates that have no actual news in them. And I really had nothing to share other than: I deleted thousands of words and feel so much better now 😅

Anyway, little about my demo plans have changed: I'm still putting out the Chapter 3 demos in Choicescript/on Dashingdon and then will be going dark to move things over to Twine. Where I am in the process right now is... feeling like 35% done with the overhauled version of this chapter and 50% done for the next demo update.

As far as asks, I'm... not really sure what to do?? I believe I've read them all (I love you guys), but so much time has passed since getting most of them that I'm not sure if it's, like... still pertinent??? To go back and answer them?? I suppose some of them like character asks could be, but all the nice messages of support -- that feels weird since I've practically ghosted this blog since August! Idk. Y'all tell me what to do with 'em and I'll do it. Maybe I should make a poll.

Uh... that's really all there is to say regarding the game! I've added some personal stuff after the cut, but if you're done here: Thanks for reading and sticking around. It means the world, for real.

So what has occupied my time all this time? Doctor, therapy, money, and friends. And improv! But especially the first two. There was a lot of non-writing related stuff fucking up my ability to focus and write, so hopefully with my mind and body both feeling a lot better, I can get back to being present and active with the game. I didn't realize how physically unwell I was until last year and it's been like... life-long issues I've been treating. It turns out it's not normal to feel exhausted enough to sleep at any given time, at all times, for your whole life! wow!!

I also uninstalled Tumblr from my phone back in February, so you could say I'm sort of generally focused on offline life. (And what an interesting coincidence that my writer's block dissipated shortly after that...) I also just moved!! The last two weekends have been so expensive and stressful -_- But I can't even compare the old place to the new. We're basically paying the same price for idek how much more space. The cats are so happy; which means the house humans get to be happy.

My schedule is finally freed up from constant medical shit (there was a 3-month stretch this winter with multiple doctor appointments literally every fucking week 🙃🙃🙃). My mental health is doing a lot better -- literally incomparably better compared to where I was this time last year. There's live comedy now (which I dabble in, to be clear lol), but I've finally found myself able to like... balance it all. The physical and creative energy that goes into it all, anyway. The lovely thing about improv is that you kinda just show up and do your thing -- it doesn't cut into my writing time so much as it costs energy. Unless I end up in this comedy debate show thing next month, which I am very excited to give up writing time for

So like... Life is life-ing and I'm just vibing. Or something? I'll be around.

Thank you all again so much for your interest, support, patience, and readership <3

[radaverse]

When is Tower of mistakes gonna be done, I CAN'T WAIT! :3

Huh, looks like it's time for a

VERY IMPORTANT™ TOWER OF MISTAKES UPDATE

And I'm pleased to announce that

THE HIATUS IS OVER!!! (mostly)

So, it's been kind of long since we got the last update, hasn't it? Well, you don't have to continue waiting so much anymore! I've got ideas, motivation and a remake release date!

First, lemme tell you what I've been doing meanwhile.

As many of you know there's a Samurai Jack AU comic on the works as well (Paws of Magic), I've been cooking with my 2 teammates and we're making sure to cook something great! ✨ Then, I heard about this "artfight" thing around tumblr, I checked it out and decided to join! It surely helped me improve my style and my ways of organizing works and schedules.

Now that I'm "free" (back at uni lol. no big deal tho), I can work on things like paws of magic and ofc, the tower of mistakes remake.

I've got some ToM updates:

The hiatus is gonna be over in less of a month. That is

September 6, 2024!

This way the remake's release date matches the original's and the fact that it matches my birthday (I had a feeling ToM could get important so decided to start it on my bday lol, I was kinda right wasn't it? omggg)

The art style gets some REAL changes!

I'm no longer going to use a sketchbook to draw the lineart and then color it digitally. The comic will now be 100% digital! Which means the page formatting and style will get an improvement boost!

Schedule. Schedule...

I used to upload the pages every time I finished one, which led to rushing, hiatus and burnout. I'm not doing that anymore. I'll be working on a bunch of pages/a full chapter beforehand, then batch upload them from each chapter's release date to the last of its pages, 1 page a day. This way you guys don't get extremely long waits and I don't get extreme burnout 😭

So, these are the updates for Tower of Mistakes!

As for the rest of blog, I'll be drawing the ToM pages, doodling random stuff and working on Paws of Magic as well!

And if you realllyyyy can't wait until that day to check ToM stuff, then join the Discord Server! ✨

There you can get new friends (like me ofc vjdfd), get comic emojis, have fun and you might or might not get some comic wips hmmm

This is gonna get wild :)

now a random poll xd

[pallastrology]

FAQ: how to use astrology

artwork by frederic edwin church

disclaimer: there are, of course, many branches of astrology going back many hundreds of years, all with many uses depending on who you ask. location matters hugely too! different cultures and areas have, and do, use astrology differently. i have no experience outside of the uk so can't comment on this however. in this post, i'm talking about modern tropical astrology. as always, take what works and leave the rest <3

traditionally, astrology has been used for everything from academic research, medicine, informing politicians and farmers alike, and was considered an important science. nowadays, it has a poor reputation in some circles but is still a useful tool for lots of people, if used very differently. these days, it's mostly used on a personal level; astrologers still study carefully and make predictions about various sectors and generational changes, but the 'general user' is more likely to see astrology as some of the following:

a tool for psychoanalysis and self-development: this is how i got into astrology properly, as someone with a budding interest in psychology and a desire to improve my self-knowledge. learning about your natal chart, what the placements mean and how they interact with each other (and even with the placements of other people in your life) can be a really valuable tool for introspection and reflection, and ultimately, self-development and growth.

a tool for divination: this could be a post in and of itself, but to keep it quick, using astrology as a divination tool can be really helpful. keeping track of certain transits, like retrogrades, lunar transits, returns or just the daily movements of the planets and points around us can help us plan our time better, perform more effective rituals, be aware of when the time is (and isn't) right to make a big move, and feel more confident in our decisions.

part of a spiritual practice: this could be witchcraft, a religious or spiritual path you're on, or you just like to work with the moon. for example, you might want to incorporate elements of your placements in a spell, or perform a ritual during a certain lunar transit. you might use astrology in more of an 'old-fashioned' way in the form of an almanac, or avoid certain practices during mercury retrograde.

how i use astrology myself: i use it daily, as both a divination and a psychoanalytical tool. every month i consult my transits and jot down all the major/interesting ones in my planner, along with lunar transits as i love the moon lol. i use those transits to plan out certain activities, for example, a house clean every new moon, allowing extra travel time during mercury retrograde, carving out some time to relax and rest during certain lunar transits. i also feel i 'know what to expect' a bit, having done this (not as consistently as i'd have liked) for years, so for example i'm aware of how mercury retrograde affects me personally and can tailor my advice to myself a bit by now. i also consider astrology an integral part of my own spiritual practice, and i use it 'academically' to inform my tarot studies. never mind using it for this blog and for readings etc... it's definitely an important part of my daily life :-)

at the end of the day, whatever works for you, is what works for you. how do you use astrology day-to-day, if you aren't an astrologer? is it a big part of your life, or a bit of fun? how did you get into astrology, and was it a 'gateway' for you?

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

Dude… are you ok? Cause you’re kind of interpreting this whole thing as something deep when it really isn’t.

Hello, welcome to my blog.

I interpret things deeply when they shouldn't be, FOR FUN how are you doing?

loooool.

Like, It is a silly little youtube show, and the writers are on a time crunch and everything is likely half improv half written in a day. And they've done this for two years going on three.

So I don't expect expert writing. And I have nothing but the MASSIVE respect for the voice actors, writers and everyone involved.

I was even disappointed by how KC and Bloodmoon were handled too. So it's not the first time I've been disappointed by which direction the show takes.

But the over-analysis is literally for fun.

I am legit having fun.

But honestly? At the same time I don't think I'm okay.

I get super emotional when Robots replace other Robots with something with different memories with the same face. I was pretty much the same way when OldMoon died too.

I could go into a trauma dump on why this whole thing upsets me so much, but no one on tumblr needs to hear that. I honestly do understand the other side of the fandom that do take the Celestial Family's side in this whole thing (which I don't think there should be sides to begin with. lol) For me, personally, the whole thing happened way too quickly for me to understand how people are behaving in the way they did.

It's a conflict of me being unable to buy into the narrative because of how quick everything transpires.

And I can run here and chase my tail and do the "You are not me and I am not you" thing all day so ofc we have different thoughts on things but I think that is part of what makes the Sun and Moon show so special to me and a lot of other people

So? I overreact and relate to a character because I find their situation extremely relatable?

GOOD. FANTASTIC even.

It means that the Youtube Channel that makes content for shock value got me to FEEL something.

They are doing their job as intended, and the show will move on.

Nothing but respect and the highest regards they've been able to keep the show going for so long.

If things get stale for them, a new villain shows up, someone dies, or something in the status quo changes. They have to keep it fresh. This is nothing new. It's another evolution.

And honestly, I'll leave when I want to leave. I know my limits, and for now, Color me intrigued to see where all this is going...

[erehwontownies]

🎉 Big Announcement

I have some important changes coming to way the townies will be shared. Here's what to expect! It's a lot, but don't worry: we're not stopping any time soon.

What's New

✨ Version 2 Townies — The main announcement! New, expanded makeovers for existing townies in order to incorporate new CAS features, such as romance options and eyelashes. There will be new and familiar faces in the households. Most sims will get new appearances, wardrobes, and additional traits.

✨ Moving To the Main Blog — After much thought, I've decided to move the townie posts to my main blog @m0ckest which I'll encourage you now to follow if you want to keep up with the townies. Feel free to unfollow the original blog @erehwontownies, as new Version 2 Townies will be posted directly on @m0ckest. @erehwontownies will be deleted when I've caught up with all the existing makeovers. A download archive to the old makeovers will be available.

Post Format — Sims in preview pictures will now be shown with the CC skin details I use. Downloads will remain CC-free and available on the gallery, simfileshare, & patreon. Most household descriptions will be re-written and sims will now have short individual biographies in the post. (My picture-editing skills have also improved lol.)

Bulk Downloads — Been meaning to do this for a long time! They'll be available by world.

Future Plans

Save File — There's a long way to go before we arrive here and I haven't worked out exactly how I want to execute it, but the townies will eventually be incorporated into their own save file with relationships and clubs for easy use.

Questions?

Feel free to send me an ask/message on my main blog @m0ckest!

I've had so much fun sharing my townie makeovers and it brings me joy to see other people interested in them. Thank you, as always, for hanging out with me and I'm excited for the new chapter of Erehwon Townies! Love y'all! 🥰

[peachyfnaf]

Morning peachy!

Happy Friday, I was scrolling through your blog and literally didn't realize you were the one that made the Nexus design that lives in my head rent free. I love your art and vibes ❤️🥰❤️

I'm at the part when Old Moon is back and met Earth it's SO AWKWARD

I don't like it (not mad he's back but it's just the entire lead up has me upset)

I was watching Baby Moon/New Moon and Earth like you said and idk, I think it's really messed up how everything went down. Earth seemed to jump to a lot of conclusions about New Moon and she seemed really upset but also I don't think what New Moon said to push her away was actually that mean. Maybe it's just me?

I also didn't like how Sun went to others for help because he's so lost on what to do with New Moon and everyone was just "let's kill him"

I'm so messed up over this....

What's your thoughts on this? I want to know your observations 👀✍️

First off,

SNIFFS. bro your art and your vibes are INCREDIBLE so that compliment means a whole lot to me. tysm <3

Second off, oh-ho-ho. my friend, you've just opened up pandora's box for me. this response is gonna be a long one, let's see how incomprehensible it will get-

(Also, just so anyone who doesn't know me knows, I'm currently not watching the security breach shows due to a bit of burnout, but mostly due to me not liking the current sams arc. I'm just avoiding it for the sake of me mental health. sooo if I bring up something that has already been acknowledged/fixed/changed in canon, forgive me <3. for sams, I have knowledge up to about "brothers REUNITE in vrchat", so. just go into this knowing that lol)

OKAY. AHEM. DISCLAIMERS DONE. HERE WE GO.

Don't have much to say about "I don't like it (not mad he's back but it's just the entire lead up has me upset)" other than I 1000% agree. I (again, personally) actually don't like that he's back, mostly because the lead up to O.M's return felt very rushed, it makes O.M's original sacrifice for K.C completely in vain, and O.M has essentially just taken N.M's role in the family now that N.M is where he is now, as Nexus. it was all very frustrating to see happen.

And, whooh, I can go on and on and on about how O.M has shown many signs that he hasn't actually improved as a person/brother as much as he claims to have, but I think that harpers on spoiler territory for you Sab so I'll save that for another day dkjfhsdfsd but as for the SECOND part of your statement...

"...I think it's really messed up how everything went down. Earth seemed to jump to a lot of conclusions about New Moon and she seemed really upset but also I don't think what New Moon said to push her away was actually that mean. Maybe it's just me?"

IT 👏 IS 👏 NOT 👏 JUST 👏 YOU 👏

From what I can tell, actually a lot of people agree with you!!! (me included). this leads to kind of a divide in-fandom between people who are on the families side, and those who are on New Moon's/Nexus'. and from what I've seen, even the people who aren't on either side just kind of find Nexus pathetic and emo. which is 100% fair and understandable, considering his "villain arc" was built off of shakey ground lol. AND while I am 100% a N.M/Nexus apologist, that wont stop me from acknowledging that he fucked up bad in some places sdkfjhsdjfk really, everyone messed up a lot to get into the situation they are now story-wise. it's not just one sides fault, and it's draining seeing people trying to make the dilemma one of black and white morals when it is 20x more complex than that. OKAY MINI RANT OVER, ONTO WHAT YOU REFERENCED SKFJDHSDF so. did Earth have every right to be hurt by what New Moon said? oh, 100% yeah, her brother just insulted and demeaned her to her face, ofc it would hurt.

But what really confuses me is how personally she took his insults??? Right before, genuinely, right before that confrontation; Sun warned her that Moon might say something he didn't mean. he warned her, because he knows from experience.

and yet Earth took it to heart??? w. why??? she knows a lot about mental health stuff, or she's supposed to, right??? surely she'd understand that it's a very common trauma/fear response for people to become aggressive and lash out, even against those who they love and care for??? right???

And I also agree that she was jumping to conclusions, or at least misinterpreting N.M's goals/intentions/reasonings. when N.M called her "not a real therapist", she took the greatest offense to that. but. the thing is. he wasn't??? wrong???? did he say it in a rude as hell and aggressive way??? yup, no denying that! but he's not wrong.

Earth isn't a licensed therapist. she is an animatronic with downloaded protocols and processes given to her by the Creator in attempts to try and be a therapist. but she literally admits it to herself multiple times in the show that she's not a real therapist, she just does her best. so it always confused me why she took N.M's statement to heart, because genuinely, for him, her best (or more specifically, her kind and patient style of therapy) wasn't enough. which is v tragic, much ow, big pain.

At the time of being confronted, N.M was exhausted, desperate, spiraling, hallucinating, not wanting to ask for help, lying to both himself and the family, in mourning- basically holding on by a thread. so when cornered, (literally, he physically was cornered in P&S) he lashed out and said mean things to be able to push those he cared about away and "get to safety". it was wrong of him to do, yes, but considering everything we knew about how Moon's (both New and Old) react to stressful situations from prior tragedies, it was to be expected.

BUT THEN??? EVERYONE JUST KIND OF GAVE UP ON HIM AFTER THAT????? he made one mistake. one. one mistake. and suddenly everyone was all like "alright, we've got to kill him." I??? DOES ANYONE ELSE THINK THAT'S A LITTLE BIT FUCKED UP??? HELLO?????

I'm not denying that N.M was becoming unstable. I'm not denying that he was becoming aggressive. he was, and that's why he needed help. he needed someone to stick by him even as he was pushing them away, to love him even at his lowest, and no one did. Imo, at least Sun has the excuse of being traumatized by Old Moon's past actions, which could explain why he was so desperate for everyone else's input, but Earth and Lunar??? Monty and Puppet too??? hello???? why the hell are you doing your brother/friend (who is doing all of this TO GET SOLAR BACK BECAUSE HE WANTS TO MAKE THEM ALL HAPPY, MIND YOU) like this???? HELLO????

And I'm also bringing up that Nexus still hasn't really. done anything??? in the current point of the story??? the worst thing he's done so far is rough up O.M a bit. but other than that, all he did was say cruel/threatening things to/about the other Celestials. he's yet to act on.. anything?? he hasn't killed a single person. and you know who have killed people?? Sun, Lunar, Solar, Old Moon, Puppet, Monty... and yet?? some people see him as an irredeemable monster???? it's. strange to me. it's obvious he's hurting, it's obvious he still cares. and he's literally killing himself to try and make the pain that comes with caring stop- isolating himself, poisoning himself, and literally ripping out his own emotions, idk guys, those don't seem like the actions of an irredeemable villain, but maybe it's just me sdkfljhsdf

As expected, this turned into an essay. BUT I'm done now, me-me needs to go take a shower gkfdjhhfgjsd thank you for the excuse to yap, Sabronda!!! I love New Moon/Nexus so much they're my ultimate cringefail. I'm certain they have an edgy Sonic OC somewhere in that evil lab of theirs

[tzipporahs-well]

Hey it’s @flangstynerd AKA @scinerdwrites but on a new blog. There’s been a lot of changes in my life in the past couple years, and as a result I wanted to make a new blog for jumblr. Several of my friends are on here and I got inspired just to reblog their stuff :D

What’s Changed:

I converted to Reform Judaism from Catholicism in May of this year. I’ve been doing this conversion journey since November 2021, but I didn’t want to announce it to the internet until everything was done and finalized. After 2.5 years, everything is finally official.

I plan to be slightly more active on tumblr than I have been previously. I named my blog based on my Hebrew name (Tzipporah), and how I wish to provide a treasure trove of info.

I would say my ideals of practice are some kind of cross between Conservative and Reform Judaism.

I’ve acquired some chronic illnesses and disabilities over the years. My body has been tough to me for the last couple years.

I have a Jewish podcast that has several eps already now. Our podcast has a tumblr blog, but please dm me for more info for safety reasons.

What is the same?

I’m still Chinese, Hmong, and queer (pronouns: they/she). I’m still culturally Italian as an adoptee. Those are not going anywhere lol.

Still have several varieties of neurodivergence (autism, PTSD, anxiety, psychosis, some kind of unclear mood disorder). My brain likes playing it rough. I have healed a lot of trauma, but the other stuff is still a wild ride.

Still don’t plan to be super duper active as I have a scientist day job. But if I ever see a great jumblr post from one of my friends or otherwise, I’d be happy to reblog.

Still hold a lot of nerdy interests: Disney fandoms (Tangled the Series, Encanto, etc.), classic literature (Shakespeare, 19th century European literature), certain manga/anime (Fullmetal Alchemist and Death Note)

Still can be quite critical of the things I enjoy.

About Me (Jumblr Edition):

Favorite Torah character (first 5 books of Moshe only): Tzipporah (I relate to her so much as someone who came into the tribe and a nontraditional wife; the bridegroom of blood scene is iconic)

Favorite Tanakh character: King Shaul (very relatable for me as I feel like I struggle from similar challenges as him: mental health issues, low self esteem, and paranoia) followed close behind by Esther (she’s a role model for me, and Purim is my favorite holiday)

Favorite Jewish Holiday: Purim (relatable message especially for these dangerous times; also a lot of fun while still being a relatively low stress holiday)

Hamantaschen vs. Latke: hard choice but I have to go with traditional poppyseed hamantaschen. They’re older (~1500s) than the potato latke (late 18th to 19th century) and store better.

Areas of interest: Jewish history, Tanakh discussion, Jewish culture (food especially; I love cooking and baking), Jewish learning (especially more about Jewish life in Israel)

What Jewish value can I improve on? Chesed; I find it hard to always express loving-kindness, and my impatience and temper can get the better of me. I’ve been trying to improve on these for the past two years but 5784 has been especially trying.

What Jewish value is very important to me: Ahavat Yisrael; it is important that we as a people stay united. United we rise, divided we fall. I admire all legitimate Jewish streams (side note: Messianic Judaism is not a Jewish stream)

Important note: If something says #goyim don’t touch, listen and obey! Don’t even try with the antisemitism.

[oscconfessions]

i dont get people's obsession with book making up with/forgiving people from her past because is her whole arc in tpot not about moving on from the past and finding new friends. idk people really want her and ice cube or match or pencil or taco or you get the point to make up and i don't see the point. let her have new friends. let her move on. not everything has to end with everybody being happy and silly together. they can be on bad terms/not talking/literally not friends. it's ok guys. I Really Just Want Them To Move On From Each Other and for people to stop forcing her back into toxic environments from her past

i think book confronting her past is important and i personally feel that she's been avoiding it (her lack of objection towards ice cube leaving her in tpot 1 and her dreading having to deal with it in tpot 10) so obviously it shouldn't just be swept under the rug but i Do Not feel like book owes match or pencil (especially pencil because match has been shown to at least be trying to improve. iirc i don tremember like anytihn gfrom bfb LOL) forgiveness. She shouldn't have to be forced to suck up and go back with people who hurt her. i genuinely think it's best that they go their seperate ways.

^ i also feel like the whole "they should just go their seperate ways" thing applies to icebook. their relationship in bfb was mutually toxic and both of them hurt the other with a lack of proper communication and whatnot. soooooo many people want ice cube and book to make up and be friends again it tpot but they're Not Good For Each Other!!! also book hasn't proven that she's grown enough from her time in bfb to even handle being around ice cube again without repeating her same mistakes towards her. ice cube has no reason to not dislike her right now because she's just acting the same as she did in bfb towards her in tpot 12. if book wants to have a chance at being with ice cube again she needs to realize /what/ she did wrong; book and ice cube's boundaries were always a mess and a big problem in their relationship was that constant pushing of boundaries by book, something that she saw no issue with because ice cube never spoke up about it until it got to an extreme point.

i fear if book and ice cube become friends again in tpot they'll A. just repeat their same mistakes or B. have all of those mistakes conveniently disappear so book faces no consequences for her mistakes in bfb which is like Not Good

i get wanting your fav friendships to interact again but *insert nerd emoji here* it makes no sense for her character and the arc they're trying to give her this season acshually

book needs to accept that her past doesn't define her so she can move on from that and move on from her past friendships. she needs to accept that those people are gone for a reason instead of chasing after them. She Needs To Actually Learn A Lesson And Change, Tpot Writers

vaguely related but dont get me wrong i love icebook (peep the blog lol) but maaaaaaaaaan i don't like seeing it portrayed all fluffy and happy and wholesome. you do you but GAFHGFDGFDKG there's so much interesting stuff about the flsaws in their relationship and just how disgustingly attached book is to ice cube and how ice cube allows this to happen until it's too much for her to handle and how book focuses so much more on ice cube than herself and they're so awfully codepdendent and they suck at communication and boundaries and they were honestly always doomed to fail They Won't Work Out Together they're tied by fate and can't live without each other even if it's hurting them and AND AND AND make their relationship uglier it won't hurt to have ship content that's not 100% happy fluffy all the time no flaws ever fix-it fic material (obligatory you do you i don't care that much this is my opinion you are allowed to do whatever you want)

.

[pleaseeeimjustagirl]

♡Dear Diary♡

Heyyy girliesss I hope this past week was amazing for you and you accomplished alot of things this week has been so much fun for meeee<3333

♡Education♡

I started summer classes and joined accountanting immediately dropped it lol I just wanted something fun and easy for the summer semester because I need extra credits but when I saw the homework and all the work I was like yeahhhh no lol. The professor seemed a bit mean too. I dropped it quickly and chose marketing but the issue now is because I joined the class last minute the professor put in a withdrawal form because I had not attended previous classes so now I need to email the professor and get it withdrawn if I can take eight credits during the winter semester I would love to instead of taking any classes this summer semester.

♡Mental♡

I’ve been in a much better mindset I am so happyyy this summer has been so fun so far and I’ve just been going with the flow and doing things that make me uncomfortable that are for my betterment. My friend and I have been swiping things off of our bucket list and I'm excited forrr the rest of this summer<33333.

♡Physical♡

I posted my blog post on “improving your relationship with food and movement.” I’ve been working on my relationship with food and movement and on this journey, it is hard at times and that's okay. I have days when I want to go back into bad habits but this week I’ve been able to push myself from doing so. I was able to go out this past week and order foods I like and not force myself to eat a salad(I love salads but you get what I mean). I enjoyed my meals and practiced moderation while outside. I've created meal plans for me to follow they have helped me get my protein higher. My body is transforming I recently took a video and was shocked by the changes in my body since march I love it and can't wait to see it by the end of the year<333.

♡Hobbies♡

I filmed my YouTube video this week and It was so much funnnn<3333 but I have to refilm the video Monday because I missed a few important points in the video. I am trying to get the video posted this week or next week for you girliesss<3333 I’ve been outside this past week I tried a few new restaurants and food and loved everythinggg. 

Have an amazing week my lovessss and continue to affirm yourself, push yourself, and enjoy yourself you are right where you need to be in life right now and you should enjoy every bit of It love youuu girliesss<33333

[to-draw-time]

Lol, I'm a big supporter of "just delete and start fresh" if you are not vibing with something online. Don't like the social media app you are on? Delete your account and the app; don't stay on it if it is actively harming you/your mood. Cringing at all the stupid shit you said with a blog you've had for 10 years? Just start a new one. Don't like the crowd you've attracted with an account? Delete it and try again!! In real life you can remove yourself from situations you don't like (usually, not always i understand) so why treat your online presence as something you have to continuously utilize; especially ones you've had for such a long time that the person you were who started it isn't the same you now? Twitter back in like 2020 nearly killed my mental well-being and I was scared to delete it bc i was having good growth there with my art reaching people....but I deleted it and my well-being improved so much more. Nothing was truly lost, my work gets out and about on other sites, and I am not doom scrolling everyday. If you hate how you are engaging online, just change it.

[dissociativediscourse]

Time to blog a little bit on the blog. Blog-style.

So… I disappeared. A lot of stuff happened. All good stuff, at least in the long run!

First off, my DID is officially in remission. I achieved ‘final fusion’ fairly recently, and I’m still continuing to learning how to navigate this new phase of life. Healing from trauma won’t fix all issues; not only is there lifelong maintenance and mindfulness to continue living that Grounded Life™️, but I still have a lot of work to do in other areas! All of it is made so much easier by this healing milestone, however.

I may or may not make a post about my experience with this kind of healing. It’s been beautiful. I’m truly in love with the world around me these days — I truly feel infinitely grateful for the opportunity to be able to truly experience and be present for all of the things that come about — even if some things feel like shit. Whether or not I enjoy what’s happening in the moment, I will forever be grateful for the opportunity to actually live that moment and experience it and have the experience I gain from it right there.

I could rant about all that forever, but that’s for another time. I’m always happy to answer questions about this experience/my experience with FF in general, also!

Other than that, I’ve just been making a bunch of major life changes and improvements! I’m teaching my own class at my synagogue’s religious school. I’m finally for real in college and overachieving. (Therapy, here I come). I may begin working in a local psych unit. I am in a genuinely healthy and loving long-term relationship with another person who is also at this phase in recovery, though not with DID. I volunteer however I can to help with local recovery/support groups. I am sober. I am surrounding myself with people with similar goals and similar drive to achieve them. I joined a Chavurah, lol. I am learning Hebrew and doing well with it! I’m baking a ton. Making chocolates, too, lol. I make kombucha now! There’s so much good in my life right now.

Things really do get better. And I’m still getting used to this kind of life and the work that comes with it. But… I’m prepared for it. I’ve survived the hardest part and come out the other end. Now I’m ready to do more than just survive. I’m ready to live!!!

I guess I just wanted to give a tiny little update. I haven’t really been around lately; I haven’t really been online much in general lately. I’m just… Too busy taking it all in. Life is so precious and beautiful to me at this point that I just can’t stop being and growing and experiencing and living and going and seeing and doing and feeling. I’m thankful to be here.

[blorbocedes]

i am new-ish to f1 so please don’t judge me for my question lol. i kind of understand that the cars change every season and that teams can bring upgrades over the course of a season, and that the philosophy around how cars are built changes every 5? 6? years BUT why is the redbull car bad and has so many issues now when it was so good last year ? and even at the start of the year? like did they start with the same car as last year and took a wrong turn somewhere? Or are the other cars just much more improved in comparison ?? thanks!

new cars every season! so they can't reuse the rb19 🥲 even if we'd want to. im gonna explain in a very condensed way, but I suggest blogs like @race-week if you want a more in depth answer

obviously the goal is to improve on the previous year's car, and every team is innovating to catch up. I think McLaren's development going from early last year finishing in p18s to first in the constructors rn shows how drastically things can change. given how quali is now 0.10s between top 4 cars, it shows the other teams have also gotten closer with their developments.

with redbull, they designed rb20 in a bolder direction of rb19, and starting off early this season when they won by 20 seconds it seemed to have been the right way. but they said themselves, they hit a ceiling on development and their upgrades made the car worse. things like the floor upgrades interact with every other part of the car so it's not as simple as just taking out the current one and changing it, without knowing how it might affect overall performances. adrian newey, who designed the previous cars was also less involved in the current one, and now he's left the team altogether.

this is a very competitive title season and that's actually more rare for f1! in 2026, the engine regulations are changing so we'll get another shakeup of who the dominant team will be

[terraliensvent]

Not a vent’ asking a question. Out of genuine curiosity do you actually like Terraliens as a species? A majority of CS vent blogs seemingly want the species to die or fail as an end result.

Isn’t the whole point of vent blogs to give people a space to actively point out problems to make the community better as a whole. Reblog to make it die faster or run out of the community feels conflicting to what the blog is actually supposed to achieve. Do you want it to get better? It seems like you do. Or are you actually hoping it gets worse to increase engagement.

So general question would be do you hate Terraliens? What’s the end goal for you? 🤔

this is a loaded question for me at the moment haha

personally, ive been in terras since april 2023, so basically since the start. ive seen every controversy pretty much first hand, was an avid reader of the terra blogs previous to mine, and terras was the first species i put my whole heart in and tried to interact with the community in. initially i really wanted the species to get better, when they had the suggestion threads i was an avid poster

then over and over again mods just kept failing in the simplest of ways. this blog was made february of 2024, a few months after the first psa and ownership change. i still thought terras could be good but there were just too many blockers, esp from coy and civ after learning some behind the scenes info from the psa

then the Reckoning came and i hoped it really would go down, if only that meant making the species totally open

when tycho became owner i really was hopeful considering the facts that previous mods completely disavowed vent blogs like mine, but shortly before he became owner tycho reached out to ask my thoughts on stuff around the species (you can see that in my post about The Reckoning), when the species fell in his lap i honestly thought there was going to be big change. for a while there was, like new assets in the item channels, feedback forms, etc. but then there were also the nagging issues that never went away from before, like hiring friends for staff, weird unspoken rules, and a horrible approval process

for the past few days ive been thinking, man this really doesnt seem like its worth it. the same issues are starting to pop up again, and the mods currently just twist and turn making up their justifications for moving the goalpost. i dont like a lot of the new designs, dont really have any myos i want to make, and im not pulled in by the new events.

my end goal initially when making this blog was that i wanted terras to get better and make the easy changes everyone wanted, but now i think the better course of action would be for it to die. make it an open species and just let people run with it, because over the 2 and a half years of this species there has never once been such an attitude of unity and happiness among terra community than on that one night in april where the species WAS open.

honestly? im days away from voiding all my terras and fucking all the way off (ill still stay in the server though, i couldnt imagine anyone else running this blog and i think its become a necessary place for everyone. i imagine there would be at least some outcry if i were to shut it down, lol). once i finish my current obligations, im trading all my shit. its exhausting to have been doing this back and forth for improvement for over 2 years now, and its just so much more effort than its worth when i could be putting my whole heart into other up-and-coming projects. it hurts when a thing you really loved and found happiness in just has too many glaring issues to ignore

i think its a bad look when most of your oldest members who have been there since near day 1 decide this shit isnt worth it anymore and want to be done with it. its a bad look when someone who cared so much to make full essays about this species on an entire blog dedicated to it decides that its just not worth trying to "fix" anymore.

and i kind of hope a lot of other members come to that same conclusion and cause it to die.

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: Helloo, I'm a 24 year old INTP woman. I've been reading your blog for 6 years now. Back then I knew about type but not typology and cognitive functions. Your blog made everything very clear, as well as fascinating, so thank you very much for that.

I was interested in psychology, because I felt inadequate then and had a hard time relating to people. I wanted to achieve a lot so I knew I had to work on my weaknesses first, to balance everything. MBTI theory showed me exactly what those were. The stress was big too at the time, I was alone, abroad for my studies and I'm from a third world country, the adaptation was hard and I struggled a lot with that as well as other hardships due to material conditions.

Anyway, for years I've read some of your recommendations and digged deeper into the human's psyche. Into psychology and social sciences as a whole, even though I'm in a STEM field. I tried my best to work on my emotional intelligence and really choose a career path taking into consideration my type and aspirations, even going against my parents will to do so.

Since I've been working on this for so long and with awareness, I'd like to test my maturity, what can I do to know if I'm well-developed ? If I have a good grasp of my functions ? If I worked through my traumas ? Them, being beaten for the slightest thing as a kid. I'd love to tell myself that I do, but I don't think I have enough perspective to test it objectively, so what do you think?

Thanks a lot in advance, you're really doing an amazing work, stumbling upon your blog felt like finding a hidden treasure in some lost island in the vast ocean. One must be lucky and aware of its value to recognise the remarkable craftsmanship you put into it. You have my admiration for that. Wishing you the best in life 🙌

----------------------

I appreciate your kind compliments. Funnily enough, I also treat my blog as a hidden treasure chest of sorts. It's a place I stash gems and pearls (of wisdom) that I've picked up. I make them rediscoverable rather than just leaving them in the junk drawer of my mind, lol.

The way you frame the question is rather narrow given that "maturity" is quite a big and complex concept. If your question was sparked by reading the ego development section, there are reliable ways to assess it, but doing so isn't likely to provide you with useful information. There are a wide variety of factors that influence maturity, so it's not something that can be changed through sheer force of will. The process of maturation must be respected and allowed to progress at its own pace, rather than forced toward some imagined result.

Because maturity is such a huge topic, I'll limit the discussion to what I believe is relevant to INTPs. One thing I've noticed is that INTPs tend to confuse "development" and "growth". To be fair, these two words are often used interchangeably and their definitions can be quite vague in psychology. I'll explain how I distinguish them:

Development is about improvement of your ability to make good use of the inner resources you already possess. These resources include things like your talents, skills, and constructive traits that help you reach important goals or milestones in life.

Growth is about transformation, which usually involves a dramatic change to your attitude, perspective, worldview, or self-concept. When you "grow as a person", there is a significant shift in how you conduct yourself or live your life.

If you're science oriented, you can think of development as doing things to increase mechanical efficiency and quantifying the progress, whereas growth is like an unpredictable chemical reaction that creates a qualitatively new state of being. To distinguish development and growth in this way is not to say that they are separate. Purposeful self-development is one important factor that contributes to growth, but it is not enough in itself to cause growth. When INTPs believe that development is the same as growth, they hit an invisible wall as soon as they possess enough self-confidence to handle most of life's problems. What are they missing? Making good use of intellectual abilities, materializing talents, and improving skills will certainly help you be a more capable or competent person, but it doesn't necessarily help you grow into a more mature person.

Maturity (as defined by the stages of ego development) isn't a skill you can work on systematically like math or violin, and it isn't even an end goal in itself. Maturity is a side-effect of sustained psychological growth. If you want to know how to become more mature, then a focus on self-development isn't enough, it is also necessary to understand what spurs psychological growth.

If growth is like a chemical reaction that creates a qualitatively new state of being, then an important aspect of growth is actively exposing yourself to new experiences that have the potential to alter your psychology. Such experiences could be as simple as changing up a stale daily routine or as complex as moving to a completely foreign country. The key point is you are continuously learning new and important life lessons. This is why greater maturity also implies greater wisdom. Wisdom isn't just about what you know or how much you know; it's about being able to apply what you know with enough nuance, sophistication, and adaptability to create objectively good or beneficial results in everything you do.

Another difference between development and growth is there could be one method of development that works for many people for self-improvement, but there is no simple formula for growth. A new experience that significantly alters your psychology might have no effect whatsoever on mine. Why? Each person has their own unique lessons to learn based on what's happening deep in their unique psychology.

If you must learn from life experience in order to become mature and wise, then is it worthwhile to control what kinds of life experiences you have? Yes and no. Oftentimes, the experiences that provide the most opportunities for learning are the ones you find most challenging. Challenges usually bring some pain, so people tend to avoid them rather than use them as opportunities for growth. You shouldn't just randomly take on each and every challenge you see, but you also shouldn't exert such extreme control over your life that you miss out on unexpected or fortuitous challenges that would spur growth. The challenges you get to control are things like: pursuing higher education; stepping out of your comfort zones; confronting painful memories; talking to people you disagree with; etc. The challenges you don't get to control are things like being born into a dysfunctional family or suffering a tragic loss. Unexpected challenges are just as, if not more, important because they strongly compel you to build strength and resilience.

The advantage of knowing type theory is you get to know yourself better, especially when it comes to being aware of the challenges that you inflict upon yourself because of flawed perception and judgment. Being able to spot the weaknesses of your personality opens up many opportunities for learning and growth.

Are you able to identify all your patterns of function misuse? What do those patterns tell you about your challenges?

Are you successfully minimizing/mitigating instances of function misuse in your everyday life, i.e., meeting your challenges?

Are you able to use your functions optimally, i.e., to apply them appropriately and wisely to form a healthy relationship between yourself and the world?

Have you built up a healthy sense of self and practice proper self-care through introverted function development?

Have you learned how to adapt well to your environment(s) through extraverted function development?

Are you striking a good balance between the introverted and extraverted sides of your personality (i.e. neither is extreme)?

If you are on the right track in type development, life doesn't necessarily get easier, but you become much more adaptable to life's challenges. The results you get should speak for themselves.

If you are a mentally healthy individual, the desire for progress and growth never really ends, so it's natural to wonder about what more there is for you, especially in times when life is going relatively well. However, asking how to "test" yourself is kind of a suspicious question to me because it makes me wonder what the underlying motivation is. Sometimes, it's an indication that there's something wrong with the approach. A "test" implies there's a formula, but maturity doesn't work that way. You say you don't have the perspective to test yourself objectively? That is precisely how you know you have more maturing to do. When your perspective seems too small, then there's something you need to learn in order to broaden it. But I can't tell you exactly what that something is. You'll know it the next time you experience true growth. To paraphrase Kierkegaard: Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards. This is the difficulty of being human.

What I can say is, at 24, you haven't lived much. You've still got much more ahead of you than behind you. You have a lot of lessons yet to learn. Personality type only tells you that some of those lessons have to do with your functions. But the rest is unpredictable. Some lessons come with the mistakes you'll inevitably make throughout life. Yet more lessons will come with the ups and downs of fate. And even more lessons will come as you get much older and gradually lose all the things you hold most dear.

If you want, I can give you some questions to reflect on for building self-awareness. Maybe some of them can lead you toward growth.

What sorts of thoughts frequently run through your head?

What feelings do you frequently experience?

What is your overall mood most of the time?

Are you aware of your needs and do you attend to them well? Are you aware that you have physical, emotional, cognitive, social, esteem, aesthetic, spiritual, and transcendent needs?

Are you aware of your passions and joys and give yourself enough space to experience them regularly?

Are you aware of your wants and desires? Are you able to explain where they come from or what motivates them?

Are you aware of your identity? Are you able to describe the things that define you as an individual? Are you able to explain how those things came to define you?

Are you aware of your worth? Are you able to describe your method of appraising/evaluating yourself, explain why you use that method (and not some other method), and justify that it is a good method?

Are you aware of how you are perceived by others? Are you able to express yourself authentically? Are you able to recognize and respect the authentic expressions of others?

Are you aware of the roles/positions you occupy in society? Are you aware of how those roles/positions affect your relationships with the people around you? Are you aware of all the duties, obligations, and responsibilities you have to yourself and others?

Are you aware of your moral values and how well you abide by them? Are you able to explain how you came to adopt them?

Are you aware of your core beliefs about how the world works? Are you able to explain how they came into being and how they influence your behavior?

Are you aware of the criteria/standards you use to define "success"? Are you able to explain their origin and justify them as being the most appropriate criteria/standards to use?

Are you aware of your aspirations? Are you able to explain why you've set the life goals you have previously pursued, are pursuing now, or will pursue in the future?

Are you aware of your potential? Do you have an ideal self that you wish to become? If so, are you able to explain how you came to construct that image of yourself? Are you able to envision more than one possibility for expressing who you are (other than what you are at present)?

Are you aware of your guiding principle/philosophy of life? Are you able to explain where it came from or why you chose it?

Mature people understand themselves more deeply than the average person. Depth of self-knowledge is necessary for making wise decisions in life. When you have meta-awareness of yourself, such as your needs, desires, preferences, strengths, weaknesses, motivations, biases, etc, you'll eventually be able to transcend your subjectivity as needed in order to operate more objectively. When your perspective seems too small (i.e. subjective) as an INTP, then you ought to use Ne to actively expose yourself to new knowledge/experiences that expand your horizons. By doing this, you should eventually encounter challenges that spark growth reactions.