#but obviously we’ve never spent that much time together and idk it was really nice to constantly have someone to talk to

[urbanfiltered]

:-)

[phoenixyfriend]

Rey Gives No F*cks About the Grandfather Paradox

Okay so since nobody’s suggested a fic under these terms, I ended up expanding on this post on discord and things snowballed. We kept to the basics of the entire plot revolving around Rey really hating her grandad and leveraging her blood relation to not be unalived about it.

With contributions by @atagotiak​, @dracothulhu​, @thepallaspalace​, and several others. The title comes from @gelpenss​.

The basic thing I absolutely need is this: Rey gets thrown back to the middle of the clone wars, and the subsequent plot leans in really heavily on her being, genetically-via-clone-dad, the daughter of the guy running the entire galaxy.

Nobody knows what to do with her.

The timing is mid-TCW for the past (because I want Ahsoka there) and vaguely between Episodes 8 and 9 because I... never watched E9 and don’t want to worry about the timeline. The only things that matter is that Luke is dead (he can die as he did in canon) and that Rey knows she’s Palp’s granddaughter (not the way she does in canon).

We'll say Luke found out from Anakin's panicked force-ghost and just went "well, fuck, okay, I should tell her this before she ends up in a situation like mine and finds out mid-battle or something."

Luke, prior to time-travel: Okay, so, now that I'm dead I know some things I didn't before. Like who your parents were. In the interest of full disclosure because I was in a very similar situation and I don't want you learning the way I did, I'm just going to come right out and say that your father was a clone was Sheev Palpatine. Rey: ... Luke: Are you okay? Rey: I don't know who that is.

(She grew up on Jakku, the history education was a little subpar.)

Setting The Scene

Imagine Rey showing up during or immediately before the clone wars. There’s this phenomenally powerful feral teenager from a desert backwater who tells you that if you ran a paternity test, it would probably pop up the Chancellor. She may or may not bring up cloning. She accuses said Chancellor of being a Sith Lord.

Your other phenomenally powerful feral teenager from a desert backwater, who may not be a teenager anymore but only barely, is very offended by this because Palpatine’s a Very Nice Old Grandfather Figure, but also he’s a little full of side-eye because if the blood test comes back as proof, then Palpatine had a kid and didn’t even know about them, or lied to Anakin, and that’s! Bad! Family’s important!!!

Palpatine hears about this daughter he apparently? Has? And is very confused because the timing doesn’t match up with ANYTHING he was doing, so the kid isn’t natural, and he says as much. (There is an explanation! It’s not a correct explanation, but he does come up with one.)

Finn and Poe and BB-8 all get dragged along because why not have the gang there? Nobody that’s already born, because [handwave] conservation of souls or something, IDK, point is the only person dragged along that’s even remotely close to already existing is Luke’s Force Ghost, who mostly hangs around begging Rey to be less impulsive. Finn is good because he is a nice polite boy, but for actual useful information they need Poe. The unfortunate situation is that the three do not land together. They land at the same time, in completely different corners of the galaxy. This means that nobody is there to curb Rey being her most impulsive self.

Time travel Rey knows two things. Luke’s dad ends up evil. Palpatine has always been evil.

She can solve one of these problems by killing the other, yes?

Rey: Ready to Rumble

See, the initial idea was this: Rey tried to break into the senate to kill Palpatine, got arrested, and then used the "he's biologically my father" card to get out of jail free. (Force Ghost Luke follows her like “please take five seconds to think this through.”)

But.

But.

It would be very, very, very funny if The Force just dumps her in a flash of light in the senate building and she just attacks Gramps on sight. Just a shouted "YOU!" and no-hesitation attempted murder.

Palpatine has no idea what's going on.

Rey took maybe two seconds to get identity confirmation and then started swinging.

[Image Description: An individual in a green metal helmet with an eye slit, holding a pistol. In the upper left, upper right, and lower middle are the phrases “I do not know who I am...” “I don’t know why I’m here” and “All I know is that I must kill.” End description.]

Of course, she gets arrested. There are Master Jedi in the Senate. There are Clone Troopers. Palpatine isn’t the weak old man he pretends to be. Of course she’s stopped.

But she isn’t executed in time for Palpatine to stop her from ruining his entire reputation.

Immediately after Rey fails to kill her Shitty Granddad, Luke's ghost shows up and begs her to not talk about the Sith thing because it will completely undermine everything she's trying to do. Pass off the attempted murder as something else!

Rey, panicking: "that fucker left me on a desert planet for 10 years!" "You owe me 19 years of child support you son of a Hutt!"

The Jedi have to do the investigation, because the girl showed up with a laser sword, and the conversation is, uh... interesting. (“Where did you get that lightsaber?” “I got it from a mysterious old pirate lady I never met before. I don't know, I was being shown around by a smuggler and a Wookie.”)

Interviewer: Why did you try to assassinate the Chancellor? Luke: Say it wasn't assassination. Rey: It wasn't assassination. Int: You weren't trying to kill him? Luke: Assassination has to be politically motivated. Rey: This was, um... not political. Assassination is political, right? Int: You mean this was personally motivated? Rey: Yes. Int: I see. What personal motivation? Luke: Jakku! Rey: He's my grandfather. Int: ... Rey: Possibly father. Nobody was very clear on that. Int: ... Luke: Tell them to run a paternity test. Rey: Oh hey, a blood test would tell us which, right? Int: ............ Rey: I spent ten years as an orphaned scrapdealer on Jakku. He's my father. I'm kind of a little angry. Int: ........... Luke: Good job, kid. You bought yourself some time. Int: I'm going to get a medic to see about that parternity test.

Obviously, it comes back positive. Congratulations, Sheev, you’re the father.

Rey comes with a ready-made built-in excuse for hating Palpatine that nobody can question or fault her for!

Rey, pouring Truth into the Force: I didn't even know I was related to the Chancellor until a few months ago, but it's his fault I grew up the way I did, and he should take some responsibility!

The entire thing is mostly kept hush hush but someone leaks it to the press and Palpatine's ratings tank.

"Chancellor, I think we'll need to waive family visitation until she wants you a little less dead." "I would like to find out why she wants me dead, and indeed, where she came from." "...sir, for your own safety--"

Who would win? A master plan years in the making spanning decades of manipulating and work? or One (1) paternity test

"Okay, so, Rey Palpat--" "Ew, no, I don't want his name." "You--okay. Sure, we can understand that. Is there a name you would prefer to put on the paperwork?" Rey, who would have gone by Skywalker in honor of Luke but can't do that when Anakin is right there and all: "Can I think about it?"

Rey: I don't know what I want my last name to be but I know I don't want his, and most of the people I’d want a name from have famous families like you... Luke's ghost, pointing out the Literal Nobody that she cares about a lot: How about Solo? Rey: ...Solo, then.

(A few months later she runs into Poe again and he offers for Finn and Rey to both take his name because honestly they need SOMETHING but at that point she’s already decided on Smuggler Dad.)

Backtrack a bit. We’ve got a bigger cast.

They all arrive separately. Poe, for one, does better than Rey, who is aiming for a murder, but not quite as well as Finn, who is currently being adopted and hidden like a secret cat by a bunch of Alpha Clones on Kamino. He vibes with the names-or-numbers thing. He doesn’t necessarily tell them where and when he’s from, but he’s very sweet and a great liar and they adopt him wholesale anyway.

The Finn situation is just... "Buir Ti, we need you to hide this man, we've decided he's our little brother but if Nala Se finds out she'll make him leave."

Of course, this leads into Shaak Ti teaching Finn how to Jedi.

Maybe consider Finn needing to almost be tricked into learning Jedi things because he willfully forgets it could apply to him. Finn does not like to think of himself as special, which is super valid, but frustrating for Shaak Ti when it comes to, you know, getting him to acquire knowledge. Finn's training at some point is "here, levitate objects with the Force to entertain the tubies." It’s a lot easier to convince him to practice when it involves the babies.

(Everyone on Kamino looked at Finn and went “oh I love him I’m keeping him and teaching him things.”)

(He’s just very lovable.)

Poe, meanwhile, buys the trust of Anakin Skywalker via R2D2 declaring BB-8 the absolute most baby of droids. R2D2 met BB-8 three hours ago but.

"Hey Obi-Wan this is Poe I met him like five days ago but R2D2 says he checks out because his droid is a baby." "That's nice, Anakin, did you know the Chancellor has a daughter who tried to assassinate him in broad daylight yesterday? Because guess who had to stop the Chancellor from getting assassinated by his daughter in broad daylight yesterday."

A summary so far:

Finn, on Kamino: Hey, um, I don't know where this is, but it's not where I was a few minutes ago. Do you think you could get me a comm? What's your name? Poe, on [dice roll] Denon: Oh, hey, you're General Skywalker? Nice to meet you, I'm so sorry about my droid, she's a little excitable and thought your R2 unit looked like a friend of hers-- Rey, on Coruscant: DIE, GRANDFATHER

Finn: [Peacefully vibing on Kamino, unaware of the chaos and bonding with the clones] Poe: [Trying to explain how he knows someone who tried to kill the chancellor and defend Rey] Rey: [Arrested for trying to kill the chancellor]

Just... just...

Anakin: Some guy ended up lost on base yesterday with his droid, how’s your day going? Obi-Wan: I had to stop someone who claims to be the chancellors daughter from murdering the chancellor after she seemingly blinked into existence in the Senate building. Poe: 😐

(Poe: Oh, so that's where Chaos^2 went.)

Poe: In her defense, she is his... well we don't know if she's his daughter or granddaughter, but she's definitely related to him, and she definitely grew up in a shitty situation that was his fault, so...

(Poe is trying very hard to explain this and not get arrested on the military base.)

As you’ve probably guessed, what's especially funny about all of this for me is the fact that Palpatine is fully aware that this girl shouldn't exist, but can't find a single piece of evidence about where she came from. He didn't start any experiments that could result in a female child, and he didn't have sex in that period of time, so where the hell--

Rey spends so much time in jail... BUT they do eventually assign her a Jedi Master. Possibly before she actually proves her evil grandfather is in fact evil. Most votes went to either Plo Koon or Obi-Wan. Plo, because he’s dad-shaped, and Obi...

"Obi-Wan, you already raised one feral desert child with implausible amounts of power, you handle this." Rey in return is very "Sweet, you vaguely remind me of Master Luke," and nobody knows who the hell she's talking about. Obi-Wan is NOT on board with this plan, she'd really be better off with Plo or like........ Mace.

Reunion Tour

What I need out of this is the eventual Finn and Rey reunion scene that is just excited screaming while someone in the background explains to Shaak Ti that yes this is apparently Palpatine's terrifyingly force-sensitive daughter who hates him.

(Finn senses Rey’s approach and just. Gathers the everyone to wait. He’s just :D REY MY FRIEND REY GUYS MY FRIEND REY IS COMING.)

Anakin shows up with Poe--just a guy who signed on to the military, no big deal--and then Poe and Rey are EXCITED and everyone's just like "Cool, how do you know this literal terrorist child?" And Poe has to scramble and "Uhhhhhhhhhhhh she saved my droid from a scrapheap once and BB-8 is basically my child so I owe her one."

Rey knows that Anakin ends up evil so she’s maybe not actively hostile but definitely very “I’m watching you.” That said, she vibes with him on a lot of things that he maybe doesn’t actively notice.

Rey picks up a snake, snaps off the head for venom avoidance, and starts biting off chunks. Obi-Wan's reaction: [undisguised horror] Anakin and Ahsoka: Ooh, where'd you find that? (Obi-Wan: And now I’m up to three feral children.)

What Does Palpatine Even Do?

OBVIOUSLY at a certain point, Palpatine is just phoning up every ally he has to figure out who broke protocol to synthesize a daughter for him.

So of course, Palpatine blame Plagueis.

She'd have been born five or so years before Naboo, just a few years younger than Anakin. It's such an EASY theory to build a conspiracy around. It is ENTIRELY WRONG, but it’s plausible! And anyone who might have been involved to say otherwise is probably dead!

A random bio-kid shows up you can’t possibly have contributed genes to? Maybe it’s the evil bio spark that did it.

Palpatine tries to placate her with the ‘my genes were stolen for an experiment and I didn’t know’ thing. It doesn’t work because her actual main complaint is he’s evil in her future but he tries.

It'd be a struggle to even get access to her, because of the aforementioned “maybe don’t try to talk to the daughter(?) that hates you” thing, but you know who Palpatine does have access to? The Chosen One.

Rey kind of decides on her favorites early on (she gravitates to Dad Energy and Sad Old Men so Plo and Obi-Wan are on her list, and that means decent time around Anakin and Ahsoka). It's really easy to talk Anakin into helping to some degree because "he'd like to connect to a daughter he never knew" and "a child of her power on a planet like that, you'd know her struggle, my dear boy" and so on. Anakin tries to connect! He tries to play up Sheev’s kind political work and how it can’t have really been his fault! It doesn’t work. Rey does not believe a word of it. Mostly she doesn’t even seem to hear him.

Rey's just like "...oh right, you're the melted mask that Kylo Ren was always ranting about," which means absolutely NOTHING to Anakin, but he mentions it to Palps, who loses his goddamn mind trying to figure out what she's talking about, because it also means absolutely nothing to him.

Here’s the thing: Rey’s already decided that Obi-Wan is cool, because Luke said so, and Plo Koon is dad-shaped, and she also gravitates towards earnest kindness in general, like she made friends with Finn real quick, so Ahsoka? Already getting along great.

She doesn’t dislike Anakin, really, he isn’t evil yet, he’s just... meh. She’s a little suspicious and she likes him less than the others but... Anakin.

Rey, to Anakin: You are my least favorite. Anakin, to Palpatine: YOUR DAUGHTER HATES ME???

And he goes from “she’s a lil standoffish” to “she doesn’t like me” to “she hates me” as is normal for Anakin.

It’s just an escalation of this one time Palpatine wants Anakin to not have rifts and trust issues with a person, at least not until later, because he needs information.

Meanwhile, that very moment, Rey is just like "huh, nobody here is listening to me about how make a sixth-hand carburetor work, where's Luke's dad?"

Anakin is venting to Palpatine about how hard it is to talk to Rey, and she's over in the Temple just like "Hey, that guy was useful last time, I should ask him," but also she only ever thinks of him as Luke's Dad.

(At one point, Obi-Wan is having a bit of a break down, and then Anakin starts having a breakdown about that, meanwhile the clones are (badly) trying to hide Finn behind their backs, Rey is watching Ahsoka practice and being like "I want two lightsabers," and Poe is trying to keep R2 from stealing BB-8 and Force Ghost Luke is just face palming in the background.)

(Rey deserved a saber staff, maybe one that can detach and turn into a jar’kai set. Possibly a pike. Mostly I just wish she got more chances to whack things with a big stick.)

[mercy-burning]

Hangover Duty

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!Reader Summary: Reader’s birthday party leads to some rather endearing drunk antics. Category: Fluff Warnings: Mild language, alcohol consumption, mentions of the prison arc (is that a proper content warning? idk lol) (As always, if there’s anything I missed, please let me know what I should include in content warnings! I always want to be as mindful as I can about what I post. Thank you!) Word Count: 4.4k

MASTERLIST

NOTE: Funny story, I woke up at like 3 in the morning last night and just sat up and cranked this out in one go, unprompted. I’m not sure why inspiration struck that late (early?) but I’m rather proud of this one considering I just woke up to edit it a few hours ago 😂, I hope you like it!

***

Watching her gradually get more drunk as the night went on had to be the most amusing and incredibly endearing way to get back into the groove of things. It was nice, actually, being able to have a good time with his friends without constantly being reminded of what's happened in the past year.

Especially considering this year Spencer was determined not to miss Y/N's birthday. Last year he'd been in prison, and rather than being able to celebrate with her and their friends, rather than getting her a card or writing her a letter, she'd written him a letter that detailed in depth how she refused to celebrate until her best friend was there to celebrate with them. Of course he felt awful about the whole thing, and when JJ had dropped off the letters that week, he made her tell Y/N how sorry he was and how he wished more than anything that he could have been there.

And naturally, after dealing with Cat another time and settling his mom down, the first chance he got, he told Y/N himself.

She was in the hospital after that incident with Mr. Scratch. She was the first person he saw in the hospital, and she was fine, arguing with the doctors about leaving to help her team. But once he showed up, telling the doctors he could get her to sit down, they left, and he pulled her in for the biggest hug they'd ever shared.

And the first thing he told her was, "I'm sorry I missed your birthday."

She'd only laughed and squeezed him tighter, replying with a short, yet simple, "Shut up."

He promised to himself then that no matter what happened, he would never miss another one of her birthdays again.

Since it was the first one since all that had happened, Spencer planned something a little extra special. Weeks ahead of time, he talked to Rossi about being able to rent out a bar for the night, Y/N's favorite bar to be exact. Just for themselves. As to be expected, it took a bit of convincing, but eventually they'd been able to successfully rent out the bar for one night, and though Rossi was insistent on paying everything, Spencer wanted to offer as much as he could.

Penelope, of course, insisted on putting up decorations. She roped Luke into helping her, and though he played off like it would be torture, for one thing he was happy to help celebrate his friend's birthday in any way he could, but he also was terrible at hiding the fact that he was more than happy to help Penelope with anything she needed, whether it actually pertained to the party or not.

Everyone told her they were all just going to meet up for drinks after work that day. Y/N was more than okay with it, explaining to them how she was just happy to be able to spend her birthday with her friends no matter where they were. They told her to meet at 7pm when in reality they would all be at the bar an hour and a half early to set up and make sure everything was perfect.

When Y/N actually showed up, Spencer had never seen her so radiant. Even as she was swarmed by Garcia putting on a pink party hat for her that promptly read "Birthday Girl", her hair slightly out of place because of its placement on her head, she was the perfect example of human perfection. She greeted everyone with a huge, beautiful smile accompanied by lots of 'thank you's and 'I love you's, and when she finally got to Spencer, he tried not t hold her to him for too long.

One of the reasons Y/N loved this specific bar was because of the karaoke machine. In fact, drunken karaoke was a decent weekly occurrence with the BAU, and while they'd been no strangers to the act, it only became more frequent when Y/N joined the team. For years now they'd spent many hours singing just as many songs as anyone could think of. And even while drunk, Y/N was a natural. She slipped up on words and slurred them together once in a while, sure, but her voice was easily the most impressive of the bunch, not to mention she never failed to get anyone and everyone to join in.

All that to say Spencer made sure they would be able to use the karaoke machine before they rented out the place. He even attempted to teach himself how to work it, but try as he might, he ended up calling on JJ to help him do it.

Throughout the night they all took turns singing songs, and at one point Y/N finished a song and made a speech, standing up on the bar. (Deep down Spencer was a little nervous that she would hurt herself, or that somehow the owner of the bar would find out that she'd broken one of many rules he had about renting the place out. But that was neither here nor there when he saw the glowing smile she had on her face, looking at all her friends with the most love and admiration he'd seen anyone carry in a while.)

"I'm jussali'l tipsy at the moment, so m'sorry if I don't make any sense," Y/N slurred together, obviously very drunk. Everyone laughed and she continued, clutching the microphone in one hand and placing the other over her heart like she was going to say the Pledge of Allegiance. "I jusneed to say how much I love y'guys. Thank you for celebratin' with me and makin' my birthday real special. I'mean, you fricken rented out a whole-ass bar! That's so nice!"

As she squealed out the last sentence, Spencer couldn't help the wide smile that broke out on his face. She was just so radiant, glowing with warmth and love and happiness and everything good in the world.

She was also struggling to get off the bar. He rushed forward to help her, and she fell forward, into his arms with a giggle.

"You okay?" he asked, his concern blowing away in the wind when she looked into his eyes with another winning smile.

"No thanks t'you," she answered, promptly 'boop'-ing him on the nose before she reached over to the bar and grabbed a full shot glass. After downing the drink, she brushed passed him with a slap on the butt and another giggle, right before she loudly asked Penelope to cut her another slice of cake.

Spencer knew she wouldn't have been so bold had she been sober, but the whole situation still made him feel all warm inside, like he'd taken a shot of whiskey himself.

Luke came up to him, clapping him on the back and snapping him out of it. "This mean you and the birthday girl are finally a thing now?"

"W—what? I don't know what you mean..."

He was obviously lying, and Luke could tell. He laughed a little, nodding towards Y/N, who was currently laughing with Emily and Penelope, a bright blue smudge of frosting on her nose. "She really missed you when you were gone, man. Even put her birthday on hold until she could celebrate with you."

"Well, we've been best friends for years, and she loves her birthday. It was... A hard year. It makes sense."

"Okay, that's fair, but do you know how bad it was? No presents, no birthday wishes, nothing. She demanded we act like it was any other day. And when I brought her a cupcake, she just set it on your desk and left it there. It sat there for about a week before she finally threw it out."

Spencer looked at where she was standing, eating more cake and swaying lightly to the music that was now playing over the speakers. "Really," he mused, not even thinking about it.

Luke sighed beside him. "Look, you can... believe what you want, but we've all noticed it. You two are practically inseparable, and the way I'm seeing you look at her right now tells me everything I need to know."

Even being called out like that, Spencer couldn't make himself look away. And even if he did, he wouldn't have really known what to say. Because all that was running through his mind at the moment was how right Luke was. How much he couldn't help but feel warm and safe when he was in Y/N's presence, and how she made him feel like the only person in the world sometimes.

He wondered then if maybe in the next day or two he should tell her how he felt.

One by one each member of the team eventually left the bar to go home. Each time one of them did, Y/N gave them the biggest hug and mumbled an abundance of 'thank you's and 'I love you's, much like at the start of the night, only this time her words were slurred and higher-pitched and very much laced with alcohol.

The only three people left at the end of the night were her, Spencer, and Emily.

Y/N came up between them and wrapped both her arms around their shoulders, pulling them in for a messy group-hug. "How'r we gonna clean this place up?" she asked dramatically, looking around once they all pulled away.

"I'm going to clean this place up," Emily said, giving Spencer a knowing look. "Since it's your birthday, your best friend here is going to make sure you get home safe and sound."

He definitely didn't see that coming, but somehow he felt like he should have. Regardless, he was more than happy to take the job. Especially when Y/N jumped up and down and threw her arms around him, giving a big old, "Yaaayyyy!" into his neck. She pulled away and gripped his shirt, bouncing on her feet with a large grin. "We can take my car and we can listen t'that CD I was tellin' you about and when we get t'my house we can have a sleepover!"

"Anything you want," he told her with a smile. "Go get your stuff together and we'll go."

As she wandered around the bar to find her shoes that she'd taken off somewhere along the line, Emily nudged Spencer with a smile. "She loves you, you know."

"She's drunk," he countered.

And as if on cue, right then she held one of her shoes up in the air with a triumphant gleam in her eye. "One down!"

"Okay, well, even when she's not drunk, she still loves you."

Though his heart swelled at the thought, he changed the subject. "You don't have to clean everything up. I was going to come back tomorrow morning and do it myself anyway."

"Eh, don't worry, I'm happy to do it." Emily nodded towards Y/N, who was walking around with one shoe on and picking up the other on the floor next to the cake table. "Besides, something tells me you're gonna be a bit preoccupied with hangover duty."

I wouldn't want any other job, he thought to himself.

And even though the nearly-impossible task of getting her into the car should have stressed him out (she kept getting out of the car as Spencer walked around to the driver's side, until finally he promised her a cheeseburger if she would stay), he still wouldn't have had it any other way.

They stopped at McDonald's on the way home, like he promised, and she was practically buzzing with happiness with the food in her lap. She made him sit in the parking lot and wait until she was done eating so she wouldn't spill anything. And in the dim light of the car, parked under a streetlight and watching her eat her food while she rambled on about the most random things, Spencer didn't think he'd ever felt more content.

He tried to keep her quiet as they made their way up the steps to the third floor of her apartment building. They were going to take the elevator but Y/N insisted it would eat her alive, and he quickly agreed to take the stairs as not to make a scene and wake everyone up with her crying. Her shoes came off again on the second flight of stairs, because she kept tripping and then laughing, pretending to fall back and almost scaring him to death.

Now he was unlocking her apartment door with her shoes in his other hand as she clung to his side. As soon as the door was open, she pushed past him and called out for her cat, Murphy. It didn't take long before the white cat jumped up on the counter to meet her, and she squealed and enveloped him in a crushing hug, picking him up and spinning around to meet Spencer, who was closing the door behind him and setting her shoes on the ground.

"Say hi to Murphy! He loves when you come to visit!"

It was true. Though he never really found himself fond of cats, as soon as he visited Y/N's apartment for the first time Murphy clung to him immediately. It didn't take long for the two of them to become as well acquainted as Y/N had been to either of them. Whenever he came over, Spencer liked to think of them as a small little family.

"Hey, Murph," he said, reaching out to pet the cat's head as he wriggled a little under Y/N's strong clutch.

She dropped him after shoving her face in his fur, and wasted no time taking Spencer's hand. "C'mon, I've got some vodka in the cupboard."

As she dragged him further into the kitchen, he squeezed her hand and tried to pull her to him, away from the cupboard. "Y/N, it's almost one in the morning, you need to go to bed."

She turned to face him and whined. "But it's my birthday, you can't make me."

"Well, technically it isn't your birthday anymore since it's past midnight. So, really, I can make you. Come on."

She whined again as he dragged her along to the bedroom. Once they got inside, he sat her down on the bed and reached out to pull off her party hat, which was lopsided and almost placed on her forehead like a unicorn horn. But when he touched the string, she grabbed his hand.

"I wanna leave it on," she said softly.

"It's not safe, you could choke yourself in your sleep," Spencer countered, brushing her hand away and taking the hat off. As his fingers brushed her cheek, she sighed and closed her eyes, a few seconds before letting out a little giggle.

"That tickled," she laughed as he set the hat on her bedside table.

She opened her eyes and smiled at him, and he started to feel all warm again. "Sorry," he whispered, taking the time to memorize the way she looked right then. The curls in her hair had fallen flat, and her makeup was a little smudged, but the lazy smile on her face and the way she blinked up at him with her big, beautiful eyes would always be worth remembering. He could have stayed in that moment forever, just sitting in that comforting silence.

But alas, she was drunk, and unable to be quiet for more than ten seconds.

Y/N lightly poked him in the chest and laughed. "Hey, d'y'think Murphy ever gets tired?"

"I'm sure he does," was all Spencer said, trying to get her to lay down. She did so as she spoke, rambling on about what she thought her cat might have done when she was away at work. But she stopped talking altogether when Spencer tried to put a blanket over her.

"No," was all she said, kicking her legs up.

"You don't want a blanket?"

"No, I want you to be in the blanket with me."

He thought about it for a second before motioning for her to scoot over. "I'll lay with you for a little while, but you have to promise me you'll go to sleep, okay?"

She giggled triumphantly as he laid down beside her and draped the blanket over their legs. "I told'ya a sleepover would be fun."

Spencer reached out and lightly rubbed her arm, knowing that always got her to fall asleep. "I know you did."

But she didn't close her eyes. She was unusually quiet though, just silently staring at his face before she sharply pulled her arm away. "You're tickling me again."

"I thought you liked when I rub your arm, it helps you sleep," is all he said.

Y/N grabbed his hand and pulled it up to lay between them on the pillow, separating their faces. She placed it palm up and rolled up his sleeves so she could rub his forearm, too. Her touches weren't as light, but she giggled all the same. "Am I tickling you?"

He wanted to tell her the truth, which was that she was not tickling him, and it actually felt really nice. But because it might make her feel better, he lied, and told her, "Yes."

"Good," she laughed, moving her hand faster. Now she was just tracing his forearm with her middle finger like she might rub out a stain on the carpet, and Spencer tried to wiggle his arm away.

"Y/N..."

He didn't say it to be mean or irritated, in fact his voice was level and soothing as not to alarm her at all, but all the same she gasped and immediately pulled her hand away. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?"

"No," he reassured, moving a little closer to her. "You didn't hurt me, I'm ok—"

"Let me kiss it and make it feel better," she continued, ignoring him completely. Before he could stop her, she grabbed his arm and brought it to her mouth, pressing gentle lips to the crease of his elbow trough the fabric of his shirt, then moving the tiny kisses along up his arm until she made it to his wrist. She didn't stop there, continuing to kiss the palm of his hand and even along his fingers, right until she reached his fingertips.

He laid there, completely still and mesmerized as she flipped his arm over and worked her way down again, kissing the backside of his hand and keeping her lips pressed to his wrist for approximately four seconds. Then she flipped his arm over again and kissed the palm of his hand once more, repeating her many kisses until she got to his middle finger.

He should have seen it coming.

He was so caught up in the feeling of her lips pressed against his skin that it completely slipped his mind that she was still drunk. So when she wrapped her lips around his middle finger and sucked it into her mouth with a laugh, he pulled his arm away and sighed.

She actually cackled with laughter, slightly flailing her legs under the blanket. "Gotcha!"

"Ha-ha," Spencer deadpanned, wiping his finger on his shirt.

He wasn't really sure what to say once her laughter died down, but once he opened his mouth to suggest they try sleeping, she spoke first.

"Can I have a glass of water?"

He studied her for a moment. "You're not going to try anything funny, are you?"

She laughed, leaning forward and brushing her nose against his for the briefest of seconds before retreating and looking him in the eye. "I wouldn't dream of it."

There was no way he could say no. "Alright. I'll be back in a second."

Spencer got out of the bed and turned to leave, but she leaned forward and grabbed his hand. "Wait! I have to tell you a secret first."

If he stayed and listened to what she had to say, it was probably dangerous territory, because in the movies this was always the moment where there were drunken confessions of things you never wanted to say out loud, right? And he didn't want to do that to her, but realistically she was probably going to say something ridiculous about Murphy. Right?

Nonetheless, Spencer turned around and looked down at Y/N. "What is it?"

She pulled his hand, scooting closer to the edge of the bed. "Come closer. It's a secret."

He leaned down, but she pulled him again. "Closer!"

Finally, he made his way down to her face, turning his head so she could whisper in his ear.

But she didn't. Instead he felt her press a kiss to his cheek, emphasized with a loud smooch-ing sound when she pulled away. He looked down at her to see the biggest smile on her face.

"S'all I wanted to say. You can go now."

He smiled back at her before nodding and leaving the room, his cheek and arm practically burning from where she'd kissed them.

And when he came back with her water, she was fast asleep.

***

More than anything she just wanted the banging to stop. But once she realized it was in her head, and it was there because she'd been drinking all night, her irritability was even worse.

"Fuck," Y/N grumbled as she struggled to open her eyes. When she did open them she found Murphy curled into a ball at the foot of her bed, his white fur a stark contrast to the deep maroon color of her comforter.

The next thing she noticed was the smell of something... burning? But there wasn't any sound to be heard other than the beating of her head, so she had to wonder if maybe somewhere outside there had been some kind of fire. Or maybe she was just imagining it.

She wasn't going to investigate, but then she heard her front door open, and despite the pounding in her head, Y/N sat up straight, almost scared out of her mind. Instinctively she reached beside her, knocking over a pink party hat in the process, and grabbing the baseball bat she kept there in between her bed and the table.

As quietly as she could, Y/N crept through the bedroom until she reached the door, pressing her ear against it to hear anything more. She heard plastic bags rustling around, and though that was fairly innocent in terms of menacing sounds, it still didn't quell the feeling that punched her in the pit of her stomach. Though, to be fair, she was certain a lot of that had to do with the copious amounts of whiskey and other liquor she drank the night before.

She took a deep breath before slowly swinging the door open and taking a few quiet steps into the hallway, just before she had to turn the corner to get into the kitchen. The noise got louder as she approached, and after taking another slow, deep breath, Y/N jumped out and held her bat out in front of her.

"FBI! What Are you doing in my house?"

"Holy shit!"

Spencer was standing in her smoky kitchen, clutching his hand to his chest. "Y/N, it's just me! Put the bat down!"

It clattered to the ground as she sighed out and shook her head. "What the hell, man, you scared the shit out of me!"

"Right back at you! I was just bringing you some breakfast..."

Y/N surveyed the kitchen and found that, sure enough, there were what looked like wrapped sandwiches on the counter. "Why is it all... burn-y in here? What happened?"

Spencer looked around nervously, his hands fumbling at his sides. "I, uh... tried to make you French toast. I know it's your favorite, and I know that greasy food is supposed to help with hangovers, so I tried to make some bacon, too, but it turns out that I really suck at multi-tasking in the kitchen, and I burned it all... So, I went with gas-station breakfast, which I figured was the next best thing."

The way he spoke reminded Y/N of a little kid who got caught doing something they weren't supposed to. He was extremely apologetic, almost in a way that made her think he thought she'd yell at him.

Now she remembered just a little of what happened the night before. She remembered drinking a lot and then Spencer taking her home, but she was so tired and out of it that all the little details weren't clear. Or present at all, really. All she knew when she looked at him in her kitchen right then, was that she'd never been more happy to see anyone while hungover. Especially since that someone happened to be her best friend and brought her breakfast.

She smiled and walked over to him. "That was really sweet of you, thank you."

Spencer looked down at her and smiled. "Sorry about scaring you."

"Eh, don't be. It was a good wake-up call," she laughed. "What would I do without you?"

He reached his hand out and brushed some of the hair from her face, at which she almost melted. "I think I should be asking you that question."

Something came to her mind just then, and she wasn't sure why. But she took the risk anyway, turning her head and kissing the inside of his palm.

"W—what was that for?"

Y/N shrugged. "I don't know. Just felt right."

She didn't know how long they stood there, smiling at each other, but it felt different, like suddenly the air around them had shifted overnight into something palpably electric. And it's that energy that urged her to say something she'd been afraid to say for so long.

"Hey, I uh... I don't know if this is weird timing, and you can say no even though it was my birthday yesterday, don't feel pressured to say yes, but I—"

"Yes."

Y/N raised an eyebrow. "You don't even know what I was going to say."

"I don't care," Spencer said simply. "Whatever it is you want, it's yours."

"So, if... If I asked you to dinner tonight—"

"Yes."

Her stomach churned, but this time it had nothing to do with the hangover. The pounding in her head was more of a dull thrum now because the pounding in her heart overpowered it. And it grew even more intense when her best friend took a step closer, placing his hand to the side of her face.

"I wouldn't kiss me right now if I were you," she warned, tilting her head to the side. "Hangover breath is basically a bio-hazard, and you're going to completely rethink going out with me."

Spencer shook his head and leaned in even closer. "I don't care."

As he kissed her, she lost herself in him completely and came to the conclusion that he was the only hangover cure she would ever need.

***

PERMANENT TAGLIST: @elldell1204 @muffin-cup @calm-and-doctor @slutforthegubes

[kkyujikoo]

These are my... 2...? Maybe 50, cents about the whole "freejk" thing. I'm gonna be extremely petty and at some points a whole lot sarcastic and it's gonna be long but I had to say it. As soon as I get my computer I'm gonna make it under read more, but the app does whatever it wants, as we know.

Listen, this ain't my first fan rodeo, and not even the first fan rodeo where I've been directly or indirectly accused of being some sort of pervert or delulu. I've been in fandom spaces since I was a teen, I was shipping mlm couples when queerbaiting in TV shows was still something that was seen as the norm rather than some cheap disgusting trick. I was there when fanfic spaces saw "slash" fics as something "different" and to be tagged with a more mature rating even when they just looked at each other.

I was in BBC's Sherlock's fandom and I shipped Johnlock during the hiatus between S3 and S4, at this point I'm not even feeling it when people call me delulu or a weirdo.

So, yeah, take this with a grain of salt: as a person who has seen thousands of times fandom drama unfolding and has lived too much of it... This whole situation is so ridiculous it makes me laugh. Like, yeah, it's maddening how people will blame anyone and everyone because they don't even see their own bias and homophobia, granted, but like... It also makes me laugh for the sheer dumbassery of the reasoning behind it all?

Like... Y'all are getting mad and for what? Because it sure as hell isn't the invasion of privacy, since y'all are watching the same content we're all watching and you're paying to see it the same way everyone else is. If you don't want to "invade their privacy", you should just... Stop watching content that isn't their music videos, RUN episodes or interviews. Memories and any kind of dvd/video that shows what they're doing behind the scenes shouldn't be part of their job as musicians, and therefore we're intruding in their privacy... Or aren't we?

Or maybe it's more nuanced than that: maybe the content they release on dvd/on their official channels is part of their job as entertainers, and it's been approved, and it's a small window THEY are granting us.

You know what's the REAL invasion of privacy and what REALLY invalidates someone autonomy? When you, who maybe aren't even paying to see that content (which is something I understand, like, dude, I'm not covered in money either), DEMAND what kind of behind the scenes content you want when I swear ABSOLUTELY NO ONE has asked you. Once again: you don't like it? You think it's some huge invasion of privacy? Don't buy it. Don't interact with it. Convince your friends to do the same. For all I care, just go and petition to boycott this kind of content. I know you won't do it, because... That's the thing, isn't it? It's not the invasion of privacy that bothers these people.

Y'all aren't mad because we get into their business or else you would have gotten real mad when we were privy to REAL private moments like people crying their hearts out.

No, no. Y'all are mad because it's "shipping content" and "fanservice" which apparently bothers you because it lacks authenticity.

Pick a side, lovelies: either you DON'T want to invade their privacy, and thus all the content they release should be focused on what fans want to see, or you WANT to know how they interact TRULY in private.

And here's the catch: "shipping content" can be anything. Shipping existed WAAAAAYYY before the word for it was invented, same way with fanfictions. Shipping means, literally, "seeing two (or more) people interact and thinking they would make a good romantic pair". That's it. That's quite literally it. Everything else is just some nuance of the concept of shipping, but at its core, it's nearly impossible to ban all shipping content when it's a group of seven people, because they should for real go in social distancing mode to do so. Most people who have parasocial relationships tend to have "ships" whether they know it or not, because we've all, at least once, looked at a dynamic from the outside and thought "oh man they look cute together". So, even if, o dear ones, your wishes were granted... What the hell do you mean by "shipping" content? Should they just film solo clips, avoiding talking about the other members? But wouldn't that be fanservice, since it's focused on pleasing the fans? (Which, ultimately, is what fanservice MEANS, and I hate to break it to y'all but the whole concept behind entertainment and thus all the content BTS releases it's... For the fans. Like, they're not going out of their way to just meet our expectations but they're certainly doing fanservice by the mere act of releasing bonus content.)

But it's not even quite that, is it? Because no one bats an eye if it's Tae kissing Nj's cheek. I've seen no hashtag against everyone - and I mean literally every one of them - wolf whistling at Nj. It's okay to show intimacy... Because they're bandmates and it's okay to be close to someone who you see basically 24/7, I hear you. And it's also okay when people see that and gush over that closeness, because it's such a nice thing to see.

Soooooo... We've got to free JK from whom exactly? From what?

Are y'all mad cause people pointed out there's very little way a bruise that stayed for a whole ass night could be a quick bite? Because that doesn't harm jk, at most makes fun of him and jimin and their poor excuses (seriously, guys, next time consider using mosquitoes or "I was doing stuff". It'll be equally embarrassing but at least the meme will be funny), and it's literally... A fair observation. Like. It's a hickey, people are gonna make jokes about seeing a hickey and poor excuses of covering it up in the exact same way they're gonna make jokes over jimin falling out of chairs. And yeah, a hickey is AT LEAST something that happens in a sensual context. Like, I could understand "people who are extremely familiar with each other will have different body language/touch in areas where usually you wouldn't see friends touching each other", but that's not. Not a hand on the thigh. It's a hickey on the neck. I don't even know a more stereotypical placing for a hickey. But once again, are y'all mad because someone is pointing it out? Because that's not being delulu or even being a shipper, really, it's just commenting on something that was approved to be shown and discussed in something that was released BY THEM.

Are y'all mad at hybe for showing something that literally fell onto their hands? Cause like, unless someone (I'm counting on Jimin, since as we know Jungkook was busy spinning him round and round and had both his hands busy) called at hybe headquarters to say "yo bang pd substitute, is it okay if I give my friend jk here a hickey? Cause he's being really annoying rn and he has to pay", I highly doubt anyone expected Jungkook to come to rehearsal all neatly marked up. Or idk, maybe someone at hybe asked them "we need Jungkook to come in with a hickey but refuse to say it's a hickey, so that fans will feel reeeeally served." That sounds perfectly plausible too. Or a good marketing strategy.

Now, if you're a big company and your objective is to have some footage of the rehearsals for a concert, and the fandom is too good at noticing stuff for their own good, and one of your artists comes in with a very visible mark, and he and his bff bropal4lyfe come n with a story about how they were playing and a bite happened, you've got three choices: 1. Cut the artist out of aaaaalll the footage. Someone would have noticed the "bite mark" anyway, you best believe that. If you don't want anyone to notice it, you gotta cut him in most of the footage where it's visible. 2. Keep the hickey, discard the explanations. You could do that, but also it would feel a lot more unfaithful to everyone involved. Also they clearly worked their ass off to invent an explanation, come on! They truly tried to do their best inventing something that was not "it's a mosquito bite", they should get some credit! 3. Keep the bite, keep the explanation.

Notice how none of these solutions include the biting never happening because... They couldn't prevent it? The only thing they have any control over is how they're framing each "accident". And that's not an easy job.

I applaud you, people on the editing team.

So... On whom should we cast the blame now? Ah, yes, I think it's finally time for the ultimate scapegoat of this fandom: Jimin. Which is funny, cause... You know... If this were really about privacy, or being "victims" of shipping... This should be about freeing him too, you know? But obviously Jimin does it for attention, while Jungkook, poor angel that he is, doesn't even know what shipping is.

Furthermore, don't we all know how much Jimin imposes himself in Jungkook's life? To the point where he, multimillionaire man feels compelled to share a car with Jimin even if they're both late in the process. And can't you see how uncomfortable he is, draping himself over Jimin, making Jimin drap himself over him?

Oh lordy, truly such an awful eight years Jungkook spent, choosing to have vacations with someone who made him uncomfortable, spending free time with him, even having to suck his ear in public to the point you can see his saliva just because Jimin was sad :( truly an all-around bad time for Jungkook, as evidenced by alllll those times when he said Jimin was pretty, cute, and all-around knowing every little thing about Jimin. I absolutely concur, the dude would be so much more happy if jimin was not in his life.

Did that sound weird and absolutely ridiculous and a really absurd joke? Because that's what y'all sound like to me. Like. Jungkook is out there living his best life, getting hickeys and showered in affection and y'all paint him as a fucking martyr??? I'm sure he's really truly desperate that Jimin holds him in such high regards 😭😭😭 I can see him suffering whenever he starts doing his own serendipity rendition 😭😭 and when he claimed you are me, I am you as his and Jimin's only 😭😭😭 I cannot believe this poor baby 😭😭😭

I've reached a point where every time I hear this stuff I laugh because the levels of twisting reality when it comes to jikook are extraordinary, Jungkook will have a literally blissed out face and people will cry in outrage.

But coming back to my point: let's pretend you're not mad at Jimin and the possibility that jikook are dating: are y'all mad... At the hickey? Because at this point it seems like the only feasible solution. And if you are, do not worry: I'm sure Jungkook's skin was throughly healed by his boo. A kiss soothes even the worst pain, doesn't it?

[phoebehalliwell]

don't know if you answered this before but in what order would you rank the endgame couples - piper/leo, phoebe/coop, paige/henry? very curious

oh hmm i actually have never been asked this!! hmm this is difficult. okay so like. obvi before we begin i must offer a disclaimer here. i am a paragon of bad taste. let’s not forget my entire valentine’s theme was dedicated to prue & jack. we’re starting at rock bottom here. i also love projecting my own idea onto incomplete pieces to fill the gaps. like. like i get how there’s not a lot to love for paige and henry and phoebe and coop but in my lil brain they are all very complex and like fleshed out and i gotta a lotta beliefs. in fact. like. hmm. no i’ve already said i have bad taste like piper/leo are probably gonna sit at the bottom of the list for me just because i cannot craft them how i want bc they’re already solidified in canon. like. idk they’re an adorable couple all that the full nine yards or whatever but like. well for starters they’re not my favorite ship tropes and then on top of that again There’s A Lot Of Canon. and i am a narcissistic diva okay i wanna be able to fill in these gaps. so like. hmm at the top based solely on coupleness and the versions of them that live in my noggin it’s

phoebe/coop bc like hear me out man they’re like the embodiment of love. we’ve been hit over the head so many time how they’re the embodiment of love and like salvation and rebirth and renewal like!! like part of me wishes that we had introduced coop in s5 and given him more skin in the game but also if they fucked up this relationship i would have been so bummed bc it really is. it’s love!! like it is the embodiment of falling in love like phoebe is stone cold right and she’s kind of starting to accept that maybe she just doesn’t get it you know. maybe that’s it. she gets her column and she gets to help people find love and see like piper and leo at peak domesticity and like engage in love, but like, remotely.because it’s not for her. and then here comes this cupid who’s like no i’m gonna find you love which is a cute gesture but like she genuinely doesn’t believe she’s made for love she genuinely doesn’t believe she gets to have love but then you know like. like her eyes get reopened to the world around her yes she engaged with love remotely but she had become so far removed from it that it lost the feeling. she saw it but she saw the individual brushstrokes and then here comes coop and he helps her take a step back and see the painting. and like!!! it’s beautiful. and then of course there’s the added trope of like. falling in love with coop he’s supposed to help you find love and now you know what the hell you’re trying but like. you’re in love with him. but you can’t be but you are. like!! and then on coop’s side you know he’s a cupid he’s been doing this for centuries and his love for humanity is obvious and his love for love is obvious but this is new. and he doesn’t know what it is!! like he knows love obviously but he’s never like you know fallen in love. and he can’t recognize it because he thinks it’s impossible but the next think you know he’s got all those lovesick symptoms he sees in the couples he puts together and oh my god he’s in love with phoebe. and then of course both believe the other won’t reciprocate bc it’s out of the realm of possibility. but then the other does reciprocate!! they also just like. i mean all three couple do but like phoebe and coop maybe the most. seem like the type of people who just kinda get lost in watching their partner work. like when phoebe is having trouble with a letter for her column she like paces and mutters the letter out loud to herself like she’s the one asking it and like bareface in pajamas like a crazy person is just repeating the same thing over and over again and coop’s just fucking in love with her like look at her!! and vice versa i don’t think coop has really spent that much time being human i think he takes absolute delight in small things phoebe has just forgotten about but to see coop’s face light up like at so flea market or something finding something that was undeniably crafted with love like he can feel it imbued in the item and his face just lights up and he wants to tell everyone how like it’s love!! love!! it’s all around us it’s in here can’t you feel it and phoebe just looks at him and remembers how pure love itself is and just how happy she is that you know. this is her life. and she gets to fall asleep and wake up next to this man like hello?? hello??!???! and then i’m gonna go 

paige/henry bc like i feel like they’re criminally underrated again bc we spedrun what should have been a slowburn but they gave me the legos and i will built the death star like. like these are two people who struggle with family and identity so much who have learned against their nature to lean into and grow with one another. like what we see of paige is a woman who loves her independence and loves her freedom and yesh has a complex relationship with family bc she was given up at birth but it didn’t matter because she found a loving family so who needs the ones who gave her up not her but she couldn’t help but wonder but she didn’t care she had her family. until she didn’t. until she was seventeen alone and scared and what are you supposed to do with that?? and let’s not even get started on the fact she only gains her new family through death as well. like. there’s so much there there are so many reasons to stay guarded and fearful and just overall pessimistic about the concept of family especially as something built to last. and then henry!!! who never knew his birth parents and on top of that never got a home like paige paige got a home she got a family who loved her hell she actually got two henry never had that henry always had nothing and like he kinda grew up in that shell said he didn’t want to leave when people started getting close he had to push them away bc he didn’t know who he was if he wasn’t alone and paige is like hey hi?? you wanna be alone so bad be alone but i actually fucking like you and i know you like me too so don’t just push me out because that’s what makes you feel "comfortable” when you know you’re miserable in your comfort. and she’s right but it’s still a hurdle for henry and it’s this push and pull of the tides where bit by bit they kind of have to learn that it’s lonely up on the pedestal of independence and it can actually be nice to be vulnerable with somebody yes it’s fucking terrifying to just like show yourself to someone honestly because like!! they can turn away what if they turn away but to experience the rewards of love we must first subject ourselves to the morifying ordeal of being known. and it’s a painful process for both of them but the fruits of those labors man it’s well fucking worth it and it’s a relationship especially on henry’s side that is plagued with external insecurities other people telling him that he is not cut from the right cloth to be with paige but like. it’s like he’s already torn down his walls to be with her and she’s done the same and he realizes he loves her like He Loves Her like. like!! who gives a fuck what anyone else says he loves paige. and then paige reciprocates omg!!! haha fuck yeah. and then like i also think henry’s just super fuckin corny levels of domestic like makes french toast every sunday and fingerpaints with his kids and is in the dad’s club at the elementary school and just does all the things that he fuckin prayed for as a child  just a constant stable feeling of home of love and like. like!!!! i’m gonna bite someone like. paige&henry man.

piper/leo though as previously established is like Thee charmed couple you know they are there all eight seasons they get points for that but obviously from reading my first two ones i kinda just fill in a lot of gaps there which i am able to do bc each couple probably checks in at 150min of screentime total. piper and leo don’t get that so like i don’t get to do that. and like. the origins of them i just don’t quite get you know which was really just cause it was such a new show and this was a new lil relationship they weren’t sure what they were gonna do with it and then again like issues with canon and the whole whitelighter thing but what i would have loved to see more in the early stages is just like why. like obviously they both found the other cute but we never really got the Moments bc it was all so preferrial and then next thing you know leo’s dying in the attic and piper loves him like i would have loved the in between and a bit more of the internal monologue the jump then fall especially on leo’s part which is like canon’s fault but like. you know like why if he was a whitelighter and knew the rules blah blah blah and it was because the writers didn’t know but like. still you know. and then s2 was bogged down my dan and i just really didn’t care for it that much because like. idk i didn’t love a lot of leo’s vibes early s2 were he was trying to keep it strictly professional and just ended up coming across as weirdly bitter and possessive however i Loved him bonding with dan in pardon my past that was a nice touch. of course later seasons pleo really makes up for the lackluster of the early seasons bc they are just so domestic like they know each others strengths so well and leo loves piper’s cooking and they’re corny n cute and they have their little moment and i do mostly like their relationship therapy bits i like that that was incorporated bc like. it happens man it’s not something to keep taboo it happens. but i do feel like that shit was often resolved too quick and then the same shit dredged up ten minutes later like some one trick pony. i also love how ride or die they are points for that. leo’s like i killed an elder and piper’s like alright. they’re really in it through thick n thin n i respect that

[turkoftheslums]

Let’s start a chain of sweetness.

5 THINGS YOU LOVE ABOUT YOUR CHARACTER.

ONE: He is one snarky guy. Being such a reserved and quiet person irl, I don’t often get to snark or be witty in conversations so it’s really nice to do that with Reno.

TWO: As I’ve mentioned in the past, Reno is a three-dimensional character - he acts like a bad guy but has a conscience hiding deep down that he only shows to Rude. He has feelings and emotions he’s stuffed down as deep as he can and it’s interesting to think what could happen if they just bubbled to the surface.

THREE: Reno is a trained combatant. I’ve gotten into writing combat as of recent and getting to write it with him feels like a blessing. I never got to write combat at all with Noctis, not even in fanfics so writing and choreographing fight scenes feels great. It’ll get put to use one day.

FOUR: The amount of stuff he just has tucked away everywhere - and that’s just on his person. He has things folded up neatly and tucked in pretty much all his pockets. “Why does he not have huge bumps sticking out?” I hear you ask. Tetris logic.

FIVE: For all the violence that’s involved with his job, Reno is a secret sweet bean. He hates showing it but he craves even the tiniest sliver of affection and dislikes being alone unless he really, really needs to be alone. Idk can you tell I’ve been grasping at straws from point 2 onwards?

5 PEOPLE ON HERE YOU LOVE, AND WHY.

Why can I only pick 5?? I love so many D:

ONE: Always at the top of my lists is @rude-at-your-service​. He’s my bro and I always love seeing him on my dash. He was the 8th person I followed when I made this blog back in 2015 and I’m super duper glad we’ve reconnected (and he helped keep me sane for part of my train journeys last month). And just for you good sir; jag skulle behöva lite vatten. (Say the thing, I dare you)

TWO: Next up we have Lyri for whomst I shall tag @hautevaux​. Lyri is a gem. Lyri is bae. Vaux is bae. I was really shy to approach at first because her writing is just 😲😲 it’s so good and we’ve really clicked since we first started talking and I love it. Also, I promise I’m not ignoring you when you compliment me, my brain just blue screens and doesn’t know what to do.

THREE: @that-turk-laney​ come back to us, Mia! We miss you! But seriously, I think Mia was one of the first people I followed when I returned back in February and she’s really helped me build Reno up. We really need to get that soft thread going, we really do. Movie night for Reno and Elena, yes please.

FOUR: JAEJAE. I love the good JaeJae over at @cssnei​. He got me really into some stuff coughUpUpDownDowncoughDevilMayDrycough and I wouldn’t trade that for the world. Every Wednesday we sit and wait for DaParty to start streaming then type in capitals at each other on Discord while laughing our asses off. I enjoy the fun we have and I hope that doesn’t change when we finally run into each other.

FIVE: Finally, I’ve decided to finish off with @shinrasfirst​ whom I used to admire from afar. Min is super cool and I spent actual weeks trying to get myself to check them out and follow them because we have a few mutuals and I was like “Hnnnnnn, I’m sure we’d get along but hhhhhhhhh”. Then they followed me first and I was like “!!!! wtf????” so yeah, now we occasionally talk about Kpop and I can’t remember what else we’ve talked about but we’ve talked about other things. (I have Discord if you want it)

5  SONGS EITHER YOU OR YOUR MUSE REGARD AS A ‘GUILTY PLEASURE’ THAT ALWAYS MAKES YOU SMILE.

I’m gonna cheat here and group a bunch of songs together because y’all need to be exposed to my here there and everywhere music taste. (Judge me, I dare you)

ONE: So I’m actually putting 3 songs in here. My mum’s favourite decade has always been the 80′s so I grew up listening to a lot of D.uran D.uran - I still have memories of us in her green car with the cassette player and I’d beg for us to listen to the D.uran D.uran tape (which is merely 10 years older than me!). My favourites have always been Rio, Hungry Like The Wolf, and Save A Prayer. SAP is absolutely my first emo song. (And interestingly enough, I don’t think Reno would listen to DD songs)

TWO: Infinity by Guru Josh. This. Damn. Song. Why is it so bloody difficult to find the specific version I grew up with?? But yeah, the saxophone has stuck with me all these years - and I’m still proud of myself for identifying the first instrument heard as a saxophone. I feel like this song says something about me...

THREE: Courtesy of JaeJae, I am super into DMC. Nero’s theme in 5 is probably my favourite thing in existence and I’m probably going to listen to it on Thursday. Sticking with video game music, let’s add some more here shall we? This remix of Supporting Me used in S.onic F.orces just gets me in the right spot. That goddamn guitar is just *chefs kiss*. Also the theme for Green Hills in the Sonic movie makes me want to sob because I grew up with Sonic the Hedgehog in my life and the movie being really good despite some pacing and editing issues-- I just-- someone come cry with me 😭 THOSE CHORDS (also chucking in Un-gravitify from Riders: Zero Gravity because that series is underrated as hell and I can’t believe Free Riders killed it. Revive Riders, you cowards. Give me my extreme gear back) - I feel like Reno would definitely listen to a lot of video game music (especially from Sonic and DMC)

FOUR: It’s Brit time again: Mr Brightside by The Killers- ahem, sorry, the anthem for the UK. Cheesy Brit songs? Yes, please. 5, 6, 7, 8 by Steps was my childhood - I still know the steps to it ;¬¬, I’m Too Sexy by Right Said Fred is an absolute must and you know Reno listens to this even if it’s not particularly to his taste - it just fascinates him, THIS SONG - I love it so much and I’ve convinced myself I can mimic it almost perfectly, my mum probably sensed something was up years ago considering my obsession with Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go. Bands like Busted and McFly with songs like Glad I Crashed The Wedding and Obviously, as well as VengaBoys with We Like To Party are joint guilty pleasures.

FIVE: To flip to a whole other spectrum, both Reno and I are fond of rock and metal and you will likely find one of us mouthing along and bopping our heads to songs like Hero by Skillet, Bodies by Drowning Pool (I have to resist the urge to scream along every time), It Has Begun by STARSET, and Another Way Out by Hollywood Undead. It only just clicked with me in recent months that I did in fact have an emo phase (if a little low-key) and it was devoid of P!atD and MCR which is a crime. But songs like this are absolutely guilty pleasures for both myself and Reno.

Tagging: Everyone tagged above, as many of my Aerith/Aeris mutuals as I remember: @roseusuitta, @cultivatxr, @pulchralilium, @floralcetra, @flowergirlgillionaire, @wallflowergainsborough, @churchflower, @thememcry, @angetoile, and YOU (should you wish to do it)!

Tagged by: @madamdirectcr

[marvinswriting]

Northshore's couples, written by anonymous, about anonymous.

a crack idea bear and I had that I took seriously

g/t mean girls

November, 12th

Ifykyk.

Hey, Northshore! Welcome to a new section of the school newspaper. I've been fighting for a gossip blog for a hot minute now, and since the paper is dying down, Northshore is finally allowing it. 

But this isn't just any gossip blog.

This is the place where I'm gonna -try- to answer your most burning questions about Northshore couples in question.

All through anonymity and observation.

To start, let's meet the students. All names have been changed so identities can stay hidden. In the tinies we've got: J, A, and R. Then in the giants there is: D, C, G, K, and S.

Who's with who? Who hates who? Who's got some secrets under the surface? Come back next week.

"Full offense to Northshore, this sounds stupid as fuck." Janis huffed, tossing down the newspaper, letting it fall to the table. 

Karen looked at the small girl of Damian's shoulder.

"Why do you think?"

"Gossip blogs are unoriginal and boring. The school newspaper is grasping at straws."

"They can be fun when done right." Regina points out. "I say we check in next week and find out more about the students it's about."

"Whats-" Cady frowned. "What's a gossip blog?"

"Aww, baby's first gossip blog! We have to keep up with this one. Just for Cady." Damian said.

Karen watched with amusement as her friends discussed gossip blogs and if they were any good.

This will be fun. 

November 19th

Love the feedback from last week guys! You're all as hyped as I am. And no. I won't confirm who your suspicions are. Stop slipping notes under the computer lab door.

This week J and D were seen together. (It's not uncommon.) 

A was seen kissing C when they thought nobody was looking. But don't be fooled, somebody is always looking.

Not to be creepy or anything.

Just- we saw that, A. 

You won't spot R without K or G anywhere near them, don't know if any of them are dating though.

Development into J and D's relationship as D is seen defending J from S. Sources couldn't hear what they were saying but it sounded pretty hostile. Is it just caring friends or something a little more? 

This blog is focused around uncovering Northshore's couples once and for all. Have any tips? There's been a box placed by the computer lab door. Got any other people you want to see covered? Let me know!

Until next week, the anon who writes about anons. Xx!

"So," Cady looked down at her newspaper. "A gossip blog, is just talking about people?"

"Hence, the gossip part." Janis folder her own tiny newspaper, tossing it onto the cafeteria table from Damian's pocket. "And it's stupid."

"I wonder who it's about?" Gretchen said. "I know everything about everybody. But all this info? This is news to me."

"It's obviously about-" Karen paused. Was she the only one to figure it out?

Wasn't she the dumb one?

"Never mind. I dunno who it's about either."

"I don't understand why you care so much." Janis huffed.

"Because its fun to be nosey about lives that aren't ours. Duh." Regina said.

November, 26th

Happy Friday, Northshore!

Wow, lots of you sent in info about J and D. Whether you've cracked the code on who they are or maybe you're just observant of two fellow students- there is no denying they're pretty affectionate.

Since we're on the topic, let's start with J and D.

Kisses. Lots of them.

Romantic, or just friends? The duo themselves give pretty mixed answers so we must take matters into our own hands and draw our own conclusions. J was seen skipping class on multiple occasions and hiding with D. I hope J has a good tutor. I could never miss that much info.

R and G are seen together. K seems like they're third-wheeling. Somebody get them out of there. K, if you need a sos, slip a note in the box bby. We've got you.

If you want to talk about PDA, look no further than A and C. Wow! A hello kiss, a kiss kiss, a GOODBYE KISS? They may not say it themselves but those two are definitely a fairytale couple.

No updates to S. #singleforlife.

Sorry, S. If you're reading this.

"Well, A and C just sound gross." Janis frowns.

"Don't be negative, Jan." Damian shakes his head at the girl on the table. "They sound cute."

"Overly cute." Cady says.

"I'm glad somebody agrees." Janis huffed.

"Poor K. Thridwheeling a couple is awful." Gretchen sympathizes.

"We don't know if R and G are dating." Aaron points out. "We don't know if any of these people are dating. I'm kinda hooked."

"Well, third-wheeling best friends is even worse." Cady sighs, glancing at Damian and Janis. 

Karen looked at the newspaper in her hands with a soft smile. She had a note to drop off.

December 3rd

Happppppy Friday! I have a big announcement right off the bat!

It is I, the writer, formally known as Anon. But now there's two of us! Me, the writer, and another student- the spy. Between the two of us (and your help from the box!) we're gonna crack these relationships open in no time!

This week's rundown!

R was with G the whole week. There was not one time they were separated. 

A, J, and R were seen in the tiny halls together where  A was overheard talking fondly about C.

Is there a fight for J?

D and S seem to never want to leave J alone.

Although, if you asked the writer, I'm totally team JD. Message for S? This isn't middle school anymore. Being mean to somebody isn't a good way to show your emotions. Message for D? You're doing fabulous, I'm rooting for you. Message for J? Pick fucking wisely. 

I'm a bit biased but my info is not. 

Don't you worry.

Until next week, you know where the box is! Xx.

"Aw, J and D sound like a cute couple." Regina cooes.

"A and C don't." Janis shook her head. "To sappy."

"Is Jan warming up to the gossip blog? And forming opinions?" Damian teased.

Karen shook her head in disbelief. The fact that her friends were yet to catch on-

-they were dense. Not idiots, just dense.

"S sounds like an asshole." Gretchen shook her head. "Bet its a boy. Yknow when a boy would pull your hair in elementary school and you'd get told, oh boys will be boys. He just likes you! Yeah. S is a dude for sure."

"Not every boy was like that. I wasn't." Damian said.

"You're gay." Janis rolled her eyes. 

December 10th

Heyo Northshore! It's the writer. Might I say, you look wonderful today? 

I don't see you but I'm sure you're just stunning.

A must be p r e t t y stupid because they were seen all this week studying with C. A kiss for every problem right? Hey, it's not a bad deal.

R was seen primarily with K this week, throwing off all previous theories.

Must have been a rough week for J. I'd imagine you've got to be stressed as hell to just break down randomly but guess what- they did. Lack of sleep? Hunger? S? Who knows what the culprit was.

But don't you worry, D was quick to whisk them off to someplace quiet.

Love to see it, I want a significant other like that.

The day they confirm their relationship is the day I expect a wedding invite.

See you next week! Xx.

"Wow! Looks like Jan isn't the only one in Northshore who needs to learn when to take a break before the break takes them." Damian deadpanned, lowing his newspaper.

Karen blinked. Are you kidding me?

"I was just tired." Janis huffed. "I needed a nap."

"I dunno man. A and C sound cheesy as fuck." Gretchen shook her head.

"They do. Now J and D though? That couple goals." Janis said.

Karen's hand shot to her mouth as she covered a laugh with a forced cough. "Couple? You think they're together?"

"For sure. They sound made to be!"

Oh dear.

December 17th

Winter break next week! Who's excited? We get full two weeks off this year and I'm so ready for a break.

I'll miss our resident couples in question though.

Not to throw everyone off but-

J spent the week with G. R spent the week with C. And A was with D?

Now granted by the time you're reading this print, this is two-week-old information- but why?

Did you get bored and just s w a p?

Anyway, I guess S wanted into the mix too? Because they took advantage of no D to try and get to J. It didn't work. G was there to protect our favorite JD ship. I'm not saying they're a cockblocker bc I don't wanna imply anything, but S is d e f i n it l y trying to get something out of J. Motive unclear but hey, we can assume :/

Gross.

Anyway, there were multiple fights that broke out that day so idk what yall were on but jesus christ calm down. Not relationship-related but be fucking nice to tineis.

Ugh.

K had no part in this swap of s/o but hey, they weren't third-wheeling anymore. 

Xx!

"Be fucking nice to tinies!" Regina cheers.

"J and G?" Janis frowned at the tiny newspaper in her hands. "Sorry, only know about J and D."

"Janis went from, ew gossip, to I'd die to have JD confirmed, real fast." Aaron pointed out.

"As she should." Gretchen pointed out. "They sound cute as fuck.

"Hands down they're lesbians." Regina said.

Karen shook her head, totally dumbfounded.

January, 7th

Did you miss me! I missed you. Mwah.

Right off the bat-

Uh. The box has been filled with messages from S saying, they do not like J. 

So I guess they're just an asshole.

Hey, just means team JD is gonna win.

Speaking of-

When J was asked directly they said that, I quote "D is the love of my life." But when asking D, I was told: "[J is] just a good friend". Sort your story idiots. The school wants to know!

While S may be out of the running, many sources say JC is a rising ship? Between A and C and J and C, I can't help but wonder, is there a behind the scenes JCA?

Fellow tiny students report A and J not being very close in the tiny hallways though. Now J and R tho-

J is just one lucky mate.

Who's your favorite? Let me know in the box! Xx.

"J and D." Janis says from her perch on Damian's shoulder. 

Karen just looked at her phone.

"You think there's a threesome going on in school?" Gretchen asked.

"Unlikely. I don't even this A and C sound cute. Why add another." Aaron rolled his eyes.

You don't think-

Karen sighed.

She really should tell them but- it was so much funnier this was.

Janis stood up on Damian's shoulder, pressing a quick kiss to his jaw without motive. 

Karen turned back to her phone, unsurprised if that would pop up in next week's article. 

January 14th

I love you- signed the writer.

Glad we got that out of the way.

NOW.

This was quite the week for our "couples".

First off, D and J? PDA through the roof.

Idk, maybe it's a special week, or maybe we're paying more attention and they've always been like that.

Those tiny kisses aren't lost on me, J. I see all.

Ugh, so cute.

A and C are-

"Skip this passage," Janis whined. "Nobody cares about them."

Everyone around the lunch table nodded as Karen began to read out loud again.

G kissed R?! R might have given a scowl but bystanders didn't miss the blush. Platonic or something more? That's the big question of this article but hey- this is a big step for all you GR shippers. Sorry to whoever wrote that long letter in the box passionately explaining how JR was peak friends to enemies to lovers. 

Shame.

#JD, anyway, you know where the box is! Xx.

"Fuck A and C. All my homies hate A and C." Janis grinned.

Cady nodded. "They're too cliche. It's annoying and I don't even know who they are."

Karen placed her head on the table with a groan.

She may not be smart, but these people were flat out idiots.

She felt a tug on her hair and looked up, resting her chin on the table.

"You okay, Karen?" Janis stood in front of her, Newspaper held at her side.

"Yeah, just dying on the inside a bit. Yknow, leaf emoji."

Janis made a face. "I don't but uh-" She leaned in, pressing a quick kiss to Karen's nose. "Don't leaf emoji. We like you here, alive on the inside."

Karen smiles. "Thanks, Janis." 

January 21st

Just when you think it's all figured out- J kisses K. 

In front of D.

At this point- they're all together. One big happy family. 

I'm still clinging onto my JD dream. 

Speaking off-

S is back. Did you miss them? Me neither.

They just grabbed J like nothing? Anyway, D was there to save the day obviously.

Our great big hero got a pretty precious nose kiss from J.  

I could make their own newspaper section about how cute they are. There is no way you can be that cute and n o t already engaged.

On another J note, if JD doesn't happen, I'd be pretty content with some CJ. C was seen giving J "a nice-sized smooch" (somebody from the box).

No development in the R and G category, just their usual cuteness.

Leave any tips in the box! You know where it is. Xx.

"Uh uh. JD over CJ." Janis shook her head.

Karen just placed the newspaper in her bag. Janis and Damian were quick to become J and D's biggest shippers. They were so good at confusing the school about their relationship status that they had themselves fooled.

Cady and Aaron, who were dating and just won't confirm it, hated C and A's relationship. Calling it cheesy and artificially sweet.

And Regina though R sounded like a bitch and G deserved somebody better.

The whole thing was just crazy. 

"I gotta go talk to a teacher this period. It was fun reading the paper together though." Karen said getting up.

There was a chorus of 'bye Karen's as she walked away.

The newspaper holder in the hallways was empty. Northshore's 'couples' was quick to catch on and save the newspaper program. 

Karen pushed the door open to the computer lab, making her way over to the tiny end.

"Hey, Glen."

Glen Coco looked up at her with a grin. "Got anything for me, spy?"

@realmisspolarbear @smallsoysauce @musicallygt

[dramashouts]

Summary: Rachel Ophelia Cambrica enters her fifth year at hogwarts (a year above our golden trio) and something develops between her and a Weasley boy.

I’ve decided to post this fic I’ve been working on!

She’s a slytherin , cool, flirty, a tease. idk. A bit of Oliver x oc in the beginning, will be mostly Fred x oc. Multiple part fic.

I’m bad at summary’s forgive me and maybe give it a chance

————————————————————

CHAPTER 0: INTRODUCTION

She secured her grip on the boot and strengthened her hold on the shoulder strap of her bag.

“You guys ready?” The portkey keeper asked, but didn’t wait for a reply.

           A few seconds later, Luna, her Ravenclaw friend, two years younger than Rachel, Luna’s father, and a few others who she had seen around, soared through the sky.

“That was fun.” Luna muttered. They where quite different, Luna was too nice, according to Rachel. She never said anything, though; she tried to keep her comments about Luna’s cheeriness to herself.

“There are bits of grass in your hair, Lovegood.” She muttered, a bit dizzy from the fall. Her father liked Quidditch, but his demanding job in the board at Gringotts collided with the world cup. Luna had kindly offered her to stay with her and her father during the cup and after it, until classes started. They were friends since Luna had arrived to Hogwarts three years ago. They fed the thestrals together.

Luna’s father insisted he build the tent himself. Rachel wandered off while Luna talked to a shy boy from her house.

Rachel didn’t get far when she started spotting familiar faces. She didn’t care enough about any, not enough to say hi, until certain ex-Gryffindor Quidditch captain caught her eye.

Swiftly brushing off any remains of the trip out of her hair and making sure her jeans weren’t dirty, she made my way to him and the red head, who were talking enthusiastically outside of a tent.

She walked, though, not directly, of course. Never approach them directly, an older Slytherin girl had taught her back when she was in second year, too young to actually understand. But she was almost sixteen now, and the tips always came in handy.  

Pretending to be going straight ahead, she glimpsed in his direction as soon as she noticed him noticing her.

“Oi! Cambrica!” Oliver Wood called. He might be kind of immune to me, but he would love to remind a Slytherin about his win.

“Wood. Of course I should’ve known I would see you around.”

He took a step away from his friend. “Yeah well, I’m planning on pursuing a Quidditch career this year. Winning house cups was real fun, but gotta get out there y’know?” There it was. Gryffindor ego.  

“Absolutely.” She squinted her eyes a bit, looking up at him; she liked that move, boys always thought she looked cute when she looked at them like that.  “Being out of school suits you.” She flirted “Although,” she took a step closer and leaned in, speaking a bit lower  “I hope you have a bit more fun this year.” The hidden meaning of her words was obvious, to them, at least, who were the only ones who knew about their previous fling.  She enjoyed making him blush. Both of them knew that, too.

“You must be Charlie. ” She turned to the Weasley. “Oliver never did shut up about you.”

“Don’t-” Oliver threw her an embarrassed glance. He always tried to seem unbothered, but he couldn’t hide the reddening of his cheeks. She might’ve cared more than him, but he was definitely redder, always.

“Well, not that I would know, Oliver isn’t much too friendly. I’m Rachel.”

“Slytherin Rachel?” She nodded, a bit confused.

“Huh. So you’re the infamous Rachel.” Charlie continued.

“What?”

“Well, I’ve heard about you. My brothers would not shut up about you during Christmas dinner last year.” It took her only a second to realize what Charlie was talking about.

“Right! Weasley! Yeah! The twins, right? Poor Flitch spent hours in there before realizing he was just walking through the same hallway over and over again, yeah, they loved that.”

           And so they talked only for a few more minutes, Rachel mostly to annoy Oliver who wanted his old Seeker back to chat, and, unknowingly to her, was a bit jealous she paid no attention to him, a boy she had, so notoriously to him, crushed on during her fourth year.

And then Bill walked out.

“Huh. Is everybody a Weasley these days?” She muttered, eyeing the eldest Weasley.  Oliver got annoyed once more as he noticed her short attention span was now focused on another boy, granted, a much older boy, but someone else nonetheless.  

“Rachel? Fancy seeing you here.” He greeted formally. Charlie looked confused.

“Was I the only one who hadn’t met her?”

Ignoring him, she explained that he worked at the bank, like her father, and they had met on previous Gringotts Events.

After a bit more chatter she decided it was time to leave. “See you Bill, hope Egypt has been nice to you. Nice to meet you, Charlie.” They nodded and muttered goodbyes.

She turned her attention back to Oliver, who she had been ignoring, purposefully, of course.

She spoke with less volume, so only he would hear. “And so I guess,” she pressed her hand against the side of Oliver’s arm, a gesture that could be perceived as casual, but both of them knew everything she did was on intended. “I’ll see you around.” Without awaiting his response, she left.

‘Never overstay, a taste is better than all of it’, the older brunette had told her, back in the Slytherin common room.

Her rules had worked out for Rachel once she turned 14 and developed a pretty strong interest in boys.

But although she was confident, and boys did ask her out, she couldn’t remember actually liking a boy, or anyone liking her really, she was sure boys only thought they liked her, and as soon as she gave in, and they snogged, they’d be over her.

Luna and Her father celebrated loudly. Rachel didn’t actually care much for the sport, but she liked the atmosphere, the event of it all. And the party of course. While the Lovegoods had settled for butterbeers, she was looking for something a bit stronger. The need for some liquid fun and to get away from the family aspect of it all led her to wander around the campsite.

She had started to miss her best friend, Argenti, who didn’t make an appearance at the game because she and her family was travelling around America.

It didn’t take long for her to bump into some fun.

“Well, well, well.” One of the twins teased, while crossing his arms, a few feet a head of me. “Ms.Cambrica, were you lookingfor us?”

“You wish.” She teased, rolling her eyes.

“It looks like you were pacing awfullyclose to our tent. Come for some advice from your idol pranksters?” Fred smirked.

“No, but some of that sparkling cider will do.” She stated, reaching out for George’s cup. He curiously handed her the cup. “Plus,” She sipped “It seems its you boys who want to learn from me. I’ve been told you keep going on and on about me during your family dinners.” She pestered playfully, with a small singsong in her voice. “Which is quite silly, considering we’ve spoken, at the most, twice?”

She had exchanged words with them a couple of times, enough to know who they were, enough to tease them knowing they wouldn’t take it the wrong way. But they were a year above her, so they didn’t share many friends, they didn’t share classes at all.

The twins’ faces were now red, knowing someone had commented on their secret admiration of Rachel’s prank.

“That’s no- we don’t.”

“Please boys, go ahead and do fawn over me all you want.” She joked, enjoying their reddened cheeks.

Fred, regaining himself quickly, leaned in to her and whispered. “Keep annoying us and we won’t share any of the muggle rum we sneaked out of our dad’s muggle cabinet.”

She pulled back and scanned his face for any sign of bluff. She didn’t find any.  “Oh, okay Weasley. You’ve sparked my attention.” She took another sip from the cider and caught a quick wink Fred sent George, she pretended not to see, she didn’t read anything into it, and forgot about it a moment later  “So I guess I’ll see you around, boys?”

“Sure thing, Slytherin. Next to the butterbeer stand at 12am, yeah?”

She nodded.

That’s when everything erupted.

Death eaters.

There was screaming and yelling, and everybody was running. The cup of sider slipped through her fingers, but she stood still, shocked and confused, until Fred pulled her by the wrist. They ran into the woods. She saw their little sister, Ginny.

Rachel couldn’t hear much of what they said. The only thought in her head was Luna. She was with her father. She’s probably safe, she told herself. But the girl was basically her little sister. Luna had spent most of her first year alone, until they befriended each other, and though Rachel didn’t admit it, she had taken it upon herself to keep the sweet girl safe, make sure her annoying positivity didn’t fade. Like Rachel’s did a few years ago, she didn’t want that happening to Luna.

           The dark mark appeared on the sky. Everything happened so fast, she felt like it was no use to pay attention to any of it.

It was a while until everything was quiet again.

“Come with us.” George muttered, so quick she barely caught it. “You can’t stay here, it’s not safe.”

“Please, Gerogie, she’s a Slytherin, I bet she could manage.” Fred obviously meant it to be taken lightly, but she was in no mood to talk, let alone joke. She ignored him, and Fred noticed.

“Thanks, George. But I can’t leave. Not without Luna. I need to know she’s safe.”

George leaned down a bit until he was at eye level with Rachel, and held her by the shoulders, tightly, making sure she was listening to him carefully. “Rachel, there’s no way you’ll find her here. If she’s with her father she’s most probably fine, they’re attacking muggles, she’ll be fine.”

“If she’ll be fine, then I will be too. No worries. Thanks though.” She slipped from George’s hold and ran towards the direction she assumed their tent was.

She knew they wouldn’t be there, and they weren’t. Hurriedly, she headed towards the portkey, hoping they hadn’t left without her.Why wouldn’t they?She questioned, rethinking her choice of denying George’s offer.

“Rachel!” Luna ran towards her, and hugged her. Her father sprinting close behind her. Rachel returned de hug awkwardly.  “Thank merlin you’re safe. We were looking for you.”

“That’s funny,” she said, though she was anything but entertained, “I was looking for you too. I ran into the Weasleys and they led me to the forest until it was all over. Thanks for waiting for me.”

[aplaceforthesoul]

Anonymous submitted:

22/f

I’m sorry if this starts making less sense as I type more, I’m just trying to describe somethings that I’ve never exactly addressed before? So I’ve felt it and experienced it but never exactly tried to put it in words before.

So basically, I feel like I have a tendency to become emotionally dependent on people I date. I have pretty bad anxiety issues, that I’m working on slowly. Sometimes this leads to depressing days. Well in terms of emotional dependency, with my boyfriend, we haven’t discussed what to do once we graduate next year, because there is still a lot of time left and what can we discuss when we don’t know what is going to happen with ourselves once we graduate, we probably need to figure out our own future before we discuss one together. But we are very happy together. But I feel like it’s starting to feel like a ticking clock. It’s terrifying. And what makes sense is to talk about it when the time is right, and just be in the moment and be together right now. But the problem since, like an idiot, I thought about it so much, I keep thinking we don’t have enough time left together and we need to spend more time together. Because the thought of breaking up scares me so much! And I’m trying to spend more and more time together and trying to force it more, unlike earlier when it just happened naturally. And since I’m forcing it and doing it because of the fear of things ending, it was always at the back of my mind, those times that we spent together just weren’t nice and would get messy and just end up sad or fighting. Until one day he finally told me to calm down and stop thinking so much into it, we’ll figure it out when the time comes.

Second thing, with the quarantine, we’ve both gone home and are obviously in a long distance now. It’s going okay. We did long distance last summer and it wasn’t easy but we were really good together. But this time it’s different. Our uni exams are postponed and online classes are over so essentially our summer break has started. Except it’s still a quarantine. And I won’t say we are very good this time. I feel myself getting more and more need and annoying(my words, he does not let me talk bad about myself, which is a little too frequent), but I need to say how I feel. Obviously the pandemic majorly worked up my anxieties, but work through that. But now I’ll be honest, I’ve developed this strange obsessive behavior that I want to talk to him all the time! And at this point, we’re both just at home so there isn’t as much happening. So there isn’t much to say. And I think I hate that. And it’s not like we don’t speak at all, just not as much as last summer. And I hate that I’m comparing SO much! At this point I’m just fantasizing the past. We talk. And our conversations aren’t dull. They’re just not constant. And when we text, sometimes the conversation ends, which it never did last summer. And unlike me, he’s keeping himself busy because he’s not finding it easy to deal with the quarantine mentally either plus he has own things to deal with in terms of family, and he does talk about it but he finds keeping himself busy helps. Which I’m more than understand but it causes him to reply late. And he’s ALWAYS assured me that unless he’s busy or the phone is away, he will always reply as soon as he sees the message, and I know he does. Now he’s majoring in game design and I’m majoring in animation. So even thought, our year is over, we still need to keep working and practicing. And I know that I need keep my peace of mind and just keep myself busy too, and there’s plenty of things I need to do. Instead, I choose to sit and sulk and overthink that he has replied to my text for the past 1 hour! And then I get mad and we’ve spoken about this at least 3 times since quarantine started and each time he’s made an effort from his side. But why am I still so needy?! I understand everything. I understand his side, I understand the current situation. But despite understanding, it doesn’t change the way I feel! And I just choose to agonize over whatever I’m overthinking about. I just keep making a mountain of a mole hill. I just want to stop feeling this way. I don’t want to sit around waiting for a text like I used to in high school! I have things to do and I want to do them so badly but why am I like this? Please, PLEASE tell me how to stop overthinking nothing. I’m not being hard on myself, I’m just desperate not overthink every single situation. Why am I so obsessed with him now?I can’t tell you how anxious this is making me.  I just want to stop being so scared all the time.

After high school, I took a gap year and got into this horrible emotionally abusive relationship. He was gaslighting me the whole time, made me cut ties with friends, made me constantly feel shitty about myself. Always told me I was dumb and stupid, without fail. And also was always talking to other girls openly, was obviously cheating on me. But when I would confront him, he’d accuse me of not trusting him and that I was stupid. And the strange thing is I knew that I was the one who right, yet I chose to believe him and stay with him? He was very manipulative. Idk how to explain what I was like back then and why. But I’m out of that now and I’m in a good place now. I just feel he is a big influence in the way I am today. And I hate that.

In a few days it’ll be my first anniversary with this wonderful guy. I love him very much and I’m SO happy that I met him. But I don’t want to be emotionally dependent on him. I want to be fine on my own too. And I was for a long time. It’s not like I rushed into this relationship after my previous one, I didn’t even meet him till 2.5 years after. But I don’t want this emotional dependency. I feel like I’m so scared of losing him that I keep making up scenarios which makes me feel like I’ve already lost him. And in general, overthinking and being dependent makes me feel shitty. I don’t want to be dependent on anyone for anything! In high school, I used to dream about becoming the strong independent woman. I thought by now, I would have become one..but clearly not. Maybe for my previous relationship, I can say that my ex really prevented any chance of me becoming one. But in this one, he really pushes me to be better and encourages me to become one! Just because I’m in a relationship, doesn’t mean I have to lose my ability to be fine on my own. This quarantine is a good time for me to work on being by myself. I want to work on myself, mentally. But I don’t know how?

hey there <3 this makes a lot of sense, I think you’ve articulated yourself really well. I would agree with you, it sounds like your previous relationship is playing a big role in your current concerns around identity and anxiety. just something to note though, there is a difference between emotional dependence and emotional closeness. emotional closeness is good and healthy, it’s something you want in a relationship. being emotionally close with each other involves trust and authenticity and communication -- there’s nothing wrong with being emotionally close to someone. emotional dependence can definitely be a problem though (more detail here on what can define it), and I would agree that that’s what you’re experiencing at the moment.

it’s hard not to make comparisons sometimes, especially when what you’re comparing against (ie. last summer) was so happy and positive and good! but I think a contributing factor of that was the “honeymoon” phase of your relationship? and now that you’ve been together almost a yr, the honeymoon phase has ended, and that’s ok. it’s ok if sometimes the conversation just ends now, it’s alright if you sometimes have disagreements or whatever. it’s not that things aren’t as ‘good’ as last summer? just that you’re becoming more comfortable with each other, your love is more stable and habitual (for lack of a better word), 

I think this quarantine is testing you in a profound way, and I think you’re dealing with things pretty alright :* being forced to be in a long-distance relationship isn’t easy at all, being forced to face your anxieties and insecurities is confronting, the covid-19 pandemic is magnifying issues and isn’t helping at all but even though you’re struggling? you’re not completely falling apart, you’re looking for answers and a way through this. 

having read everything that you’re going through at the moment, it feels like a lot of the anxiety is rooted in fear of the future? and I guess a major aspect of anxiety is the unknown! next yr and after graduation is unknown for you, but it can help to start making plans. if you start to make plans then it can clarify things for you, and give you a goal to work towards too. there’s less uncertainty, there’s less to get anxious over because you know what’s ahead and how to prepare for it. the sooner you do it, the better it will be! but the longer you leave things, the less time you have to sort things out and the more your anxiety rises.

you’ve recognised that you’ve developed a bad habit fo obsessively wanting to talk to him all the time? so work on breaking that habit. I’m currently not working or studying at the moment, and I’m finding it so difficult to find the motivation to even get out of bed sometimes! however, I’ve started to write a daily list of things to get done? and it really helps to motivate me and to keep me accountable for getting shit done. so that could be something to try doing: write yourself a (reasonable) list of things to get done each day, tick them off as you get them done. doing that can help keep you busy and possibly avoid spending time over-thinking him not replying super quick.

when anxious thoughts start to take over, when you start to feel really on edge and panicky over him not replying? stop whatever you’re doing, breathe. do some focused breathing exercises (here and here) — deep breathing works to slow down your heart rate, decreases blood pressure, allows more oxygen into the brain so you can think more clearly, and also gives you something else to focus on as well.

sometimes knowing the logic of a situation doesn’t always change feelings ): all you can do is choose to make conscious decisions and actions to fight against the anxious feelings. write down a plan of action, a list of things to do to combat the anxiety. when you start to feel anxious and you feel yourself overthinking something? go back to your daily to-do list and find something on there to complete, or maybe go for a run (or some other kind of intensive exercise), call a friend, find a new recipe and bake something yummy in the kitchen, anything that takes your full concentration and attention.

some ideas on how to work on yourself / improve emotional independence:

keep busy, create daily to-do lists to keep yourself motivated and accountable, use affirmations to fight against anxious thought patterns (see here for examples). 

know that there’s a difference between emotional dependence and emotional closeness — it’s ok, healthy and good to have the latter. you can still be independent while being emotionally close with others, the two can coexist.

something else to try, spend 1 entire day without technology. turn off your phone, laptop, tv etc, spend the entire day focusing on you :) that way you have control over the temporary time apart from your boyfriend, and when you’re in control? you feel more empowered, and less anxiety. talk to your boyfriend before you do this haha, and explain why you’re doing it (ie. to work on building emotional resilience and overcoming anxiety), I’m sure he’ll understand and support you.

practise lots of self care, indulge a lot in things that genuinely make you feel happy and warm and positive :) maybe that’s having an extra long bath with epsom salts and essential oils, maybe it’s giving yourself a face mask and painting your nails, maybe it’s practising yoga or meditation, or solo sexy time, or baking, gardening, playing games? whatever works for you! the more time you spend doing solo activities that you find gives you pleasure, the more your brain starts to associate spending time alone with a positive feeling. 

this is such a long reply, apologies if it’s a little rambling at times! but I hope this helps you lovely, let me know how you get on <3

- tash

[puckinghell]

Stars and Supernovae | February

Summary: As soon as you meet Tyler Seguin, you know you’re destined to be best friends. Sometimes you wonder if you’re destined to be more, but life keeps getting in the way. Perhaps it’s just not written in the stars? Note: This is Part 1. We’ll see how it goes! If you guys like it, I’ll continue. It has 9 chapters in total. Also, I wrote this a while ago, so idk if what’s happening with players’ girlfriends and if they’re still together, but if they’re named in the story, we’re gonna pretend they’re still together.

If only you knew how to say no, you wouldn’t have ended up in this situation. It was a thought that occupied your brain nearly every Saturday, and nearly every Saturday, the alcohol would force it out of your head. Except this Saturday. This Saturday, no amount of tequila could stop you from hating your life decisions.

Katie had only been your roommate for half a semester, but you’d quickly learned that whenever she had an idea, it was going to end bad for you. So when she’d burst into the kitchen this morning, exclaiming “I’ve got an idea!” you’d groaned.

“There’s a party at Jamie’s house tonight,” she said, completely ignoring your reaction. “And obviously, I have to go.” 

That didn’t surprise you. Katie had only been on one date with Jamie, but she was already convinced he was the love of her life. You didn’t know if that had anything to do with the fact that he was a professional hockey player, and Katie was a big hockey fan, but it was a possibility. Probability, even. “So you have to come with me.”

You laughed. “Me? Why?”

“Cause I won’t know anyone there.” Katie raised an eyebrow at you, as if she was confused by your lack of understanding for this very obvious issue. “And I can’t just cling to Jamie all evening, he’ll think I’m desperate.”

“You are desperate.” 

You took a sip of your freshly made coffee and let out a sigh. It had been a busy week at college, and you’d managed to pick up a few extra shifts at the bar too; good for your wallet, bad for your sleep schedule. “You’ve basically already planned your wedding.”

Katie gasped. “Not true! I just know I need a mermaid dress.” You rolled your eyes at your friend. But, if there was anything Katie was good at, it was being a nuisance, and it took her only half the day to get you to agree to going with her. At that point, you would’ve agreed with literally anything, if only she would just leave you alone.

And she did leave you alone. Exactly ten minutes after you’d stepped foot in Jamie’s house. You hadn’t even met your roommate’s future husband yet; she’d simply ran off and now you were sitting on a couch, surrounded by people who didn’t even seem to realize you were there, sipping a beer. You didn’t even really like beer, but if you wanted something stronger, you would have to get up and find it, and that seemed like an awful amount of work. God, you were tired.

But then, you spotted something that sent energy surging through your veins.

“Hello sweetheart,” you crooned at the chocolate brown Labrador in the corner. You crawled off the couch and over the floor towards the dog, who gave you a slight tail wag in appreciation of your efforts. You knew you must look insane, right about now, but you honestly could not care any less. The dog sniffed your hand and you lovingly stroked his face and his ears, which were so soft you wished you could push your face into them. “What’s your name, baby?”

“Tyler,” an amused voice said behind you. “And the dog’s name is Marshall.” 

Your head swirled around only to be met with the face of a guy you hadn’t seen before. He was tall and annoyingly handsome, with brown eyes and curly dark hair, scruff darkening his face, and tattoos lining his arms. There was a cheeky smirk on his face and for some reason, you couldn’t help smirk back at him.

“I hope you’ve not come to interrupt my time with the love of my life.”

The guy, Tyler, made a dramatic motion grabbing his chest with his hands, as if he’d been shot. “I thought I was the love of your life. Oh, how you wound me.”

You giggled. “Is this your dog?”

“Yep.” He looked around the room. “I have another one around here somewhere. Couldn’t leave them at home.”

Marshall lifted his head and sniffed the edge of your beer bottle, and you pulled it out of his reach quickly. “No, baby, you can’t drink that,” you told him sternly. “You’re definitely underaged. And besides, beer is disgusting anyway. My tip is that you start with wine coolers. Or tequila, if you’re crazy like that.”

“Can you stop giving my dog drinking advice?” Tyler said, but he still sounded amused. “Besides, if you don’t like beer, why are you drinking it?”

“Because my friend ditched me and this was the only thing I could find,” you admitted. “I was just looking for the courage to go on a hunt for something that doesn’t taste like asshole.”

“Hmm, it will be a tough adventure,” Tyler teased. “Would you like a trusty companion to show you the way? Stand by your side during trying times?”

“That’s a great idea,” you beamed up at him before standing up. “Let’s go, Marshall!”

Tyler threw his head back and laughed, and you weren’t afraid to admit that he had a really nice laugh, the sound lifting your spirits. He was still chuckling as he reached for your hand and started pulling you through the masses of bodies towards the kitchen. Marshall didn’t even look up.

Tyler opened the fridge and frowned. “We’ve got… very little choice. But there’s coke in here and I know where Jamie keeps his liquor, if you want a mix.”

You grinned at him. “Know where he keeps his liquor, huh? Show the way, oh trusty sidekick.” You didn’t mind that Tyler wrapped your hand in his again; his fingers were calloused and rough against your skin, but the contact sent a wave of warmth up your arm.

“I haven’t seen you before,” Tyler said, as he moved you through the dining room to what you would later found out was a study. Hockey players, you realized, had ridiculously big houses.

“I came with Katie,” you explained.

“Ah, Jamie’s Katie?” Tyler let go off your hand and closed the door of the study behind you. It was dark, only the moonlight through the window lighting his face as he opened a cabinet. “Rum or whiskey?”

“Rum.” You took the glass he handed you. “Yes, Jamie’s Katie. He talked about her?”

Tyler rolled his eyes at this. “Only all the God damn time. I’ve never even seen the girl and I feel like I’ve known her my entire life.”

“Oh, thank God,” you breathed. “Cause she won’t shut up about him and I was not excited to deal with the fall out if he wasn’t interested.”

Tyler poured himself a glass too, then turning to you. “Oh, don’t you worry. He’s very interested. Don’t tell him I said that though.” The corners of his lips curled up. “What about you? What are you interested in?”

You figured this was his subtle way of asking you if you were looking for a hookup, but you were not going to play along to that game. You weren’t looking, but Tyler was really hot, and you had never been good at saying no. As shown by the fact that you were even at this party in the first place. Avoiding the matter, you found, usually worked best for you.

“I’m interested in going back to cuddle your dog,” you told him earnestly, “maybe even find the other one and cuddle that one too.”

Tyler, to his credit, took it in stride. “The other one is called Cash, just so you know." He lifted his glass to you. “Cheers, girl.”

“Cheers,” you smiled, and then you left him and went to find Marshall. It didn’t take long for you to locate Cash, too, a beautiful black Lab with a little more energy than the chocolate brown one, and then a girl struck up a conversation with you while you were petting Cash on the couch and suddenly the hours went very quickly.

And with the hours, so did the alcohol. The bottle of rum somehow had made its way into the living room and you didn’t even bother with mixing anymore, and you didn’t really notice how much it affected you until you stood up to find the bathroom and everything was spinning. 

After you used the bathroom, you decided you needed to sober up a little bit before finding Katie and figuring out if you needed to get home alone; she might be planning to stay with Jamie, but you certainly weren’t going to stay here all night. You got yourself a glass of water and stepped outside onto the porch, dropping down on the steps.

You stared up at the stars. You had always been fascinated by them, could stare at them for hours when you were little, and sometimes, you still did. You would’ve easily lost track of time if there hadn’t been a wet dog nose pressed into your side. You squealed, and Cash looked up you in confusion.

“You need to learn manners,” you told the dog off, but petted his head anyway. Heavy footsteps sounded behind you and you looked up into Tyler’s smiling face. “You need to teach them how to say hello,” you said. “That’s no way to greet a lady.”

Tyler simply shrugged, then plopped down next to you on the steps uninvited. “He just likes you,” he grinned. “Can’t blame him, you spent the entire evening petting him. Did you think you could just walk out of his life like that?”

Cash chose this moment to give up on you, and ran down the steps into Jamie’s garden, where Marshall was already sniffing around.

“Boys are so clingy,” you mumbled, leaning back against the steps. “Spend one night giving them attention and they’ll never leave you alone.”

Tyler laughed. “Guess that means you’re never going to get rid of us, then.”

You raised an eyebrow. “I don’t see why you have to be included in this deal. I barely gave you any attention, you don’t even know my name.”

His eyes lit up. “Right! What’s your name?”

“Not giving it to you now.”

“Oh, come on, don’t be a buzzkill.” He bumped his shoulder against yours and you blamed it on the alcohol that your heart thumped.

“Tell me something about you first,” you challenged him.

Tyler leaned forward, resting his face in his hands. “I’m from Canada, got drafted by the Bruins and played in Boston for a few seasons before getting traded to Dallas last year. I like fishing, golfing and murder documentaries, and I always knock three times, never two or four.”

You clapped your hands together in excitement. “I love murder documentaries!”

“Enough to tell me your name?” Tyler teased, and you grinned.

“I’m Y/N. I’m from Dallas, love dogs, murder documentaries and or podcasts, and the stars. I never knock, I just walk in.”

“Y/N,” Tyler repeated, and you had to admit you liked the way your name sounded on his lips. “The stars, huh?” At that, he looked up. “The actual ones? Or my team?”

You fell back against the steps completely now, meaning you were half lying down, and Tyler mimicked your actions. Deciding to ignore his fishing for compliments, you pointed up.

“See that V-shape with those two lines on top? That’s Aquila. It’s the shape of an eagle.”

“That’s really hot that you know that,” Tyler breathed, and you laughed as you elbowed him in the side. “How did you get into constellations?”

You shrugged. “I liked watching the stars when I was a little girl. Mostly cause they were shiny. But then when I got older I got more into the physics of it all.”

Tyler started laughing and you didn’t really realize why until he sat up. “Shiny?”

You rolled your eyes at him, then allowed yourself to laugh with him. “Shut up, I was like six years old.”

Tyler pushed himself off the steps and stood up, dusting off his jeans. “It seems like the dogs wanna go back inside.” Indeed, they stood in front of Jamie’s back door. “I think I saw Katie going upstairs with Jamie. Do you want me to drop you off on my way home?” He wiggled his eyebrows. “I’d offer you to stay with me, but I have a feeling that won’t go over great.”

“Depends, do you like your teeth?” you blinked at him innocently, and he smirked.

“Too bad you’re talking to a hockey player, none of us care about our original teeth. That threat won’t scare me.”

You cocked your head to the side. “How about your balls?”

Tyler held up his hands. “Fine, fine. So, want a ride home? I only had the one drink, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“So this is just what you’re always like?” You reached out your hand and Tyler grabbed it dutifully, pulling you up.

“Always,” Tyler smirked. “Now come on, Shiny. Let’s get you home.”

[bakusquadup]

Ree idk if it's too soon but if you could write an aftermath to that cheating scenario I would be so grateful! Obviously doesn't have to be a happy ending, but just poor Reader being happy and Bakugou miserable because I really hate cheaters lmao, or you could do anything else but just let poor Reader be happy 😭

ALol okay, a few people have asked for it and I’m not really in the mood to write normal romance stuff right now anyway. A couple people asked for a happy ending with Bakugou, but I can’t bring myself to do it. Maybe, if you guys want, I’ll eventually add in a continuation with another character. This fic doesn’t have any romance in it, though. Enjoy?

(Also, I named part one when I put it on AO3, so I’ll use that name here)

-Shelley

Read part one/the original fic here!

Affairs of the Heart: Part 2 (cheater!Bakugou x Reader)

“With the most recent rankings coming in, the explosion hero Ground Zero has moved up to the second seed, barely edging out winged hero Hawks who has held the position for many years now.” You stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, gazing up at the jumbotron where a news anchor was covering the Hero Billboard Chart that happened the night prior. To his left were small pictures of Bakugou and Hawks, each sporting their hero costumes. “The number one position remains held by hero Deku who assumed the position after flame hero Endeavor’s forced retirement. When asked about rival Ground Zero’s promotion, Deku gave this statement.” The screen cut to a recording of Deku.

“I think it’s great for Kacch- I mean Ground Zero. He’s always had more natural talent than I did.” He chuckled to himself, rubbing at the back of his neck shyly before clenching his fist in front of him. “But I’m not letting go of the number one spot!” You smiled to yourself a bit. You and Deku had never met before, but you had heard Bakugou grumble about him a thousand times over. Bakugou’s depiction of him and his media presence never seemed to align, however, what with Bakugou’s insistence that he was useless and annoying. Maybe being with him had been clouding your judgement.

A passerby smacked into your shoulder, barreling past and not bothering to apologize.

“Get out of the way!” they yelled. Ignoring it, you simply stepped back under a building awning so you weren’t in the middle of the sidewalk where anyone could come running into you.

“Ground Zero failed to attend the Hero Billboard Chart last night,” the newscaster continued, turning to his co-anchor. “Ground Zero’s media presence has always been small, but he hasn’t participated in any interviews for the past three months now. The public has been debating about what could be wrong. What is your take on the matter, Matsuno-san?”

“Well, Edano-san, one of the most popular theories going around right now is that there may be some trouble in his love life.” Letting out an audible sigh, you shook your head. It took the media a lot less time to figure out than you had anticipated. For the majority of your relationship, you had managed to remain unknown, but around a year ago, a photographer managed to get pictures of you and Bakugou out on a date. Your face wasn’t shown, but it had still caused a massive uproar. Because of that, more and more photos of the two of you together were eventually leaked. While the public didn’t know exactly who you were, it became common knowledge that Ground Zero had a long-term girlfriend. A picture of you two flashed up on the screen.

“The woman photographed, who is widely believed to be Ground Zero’s partner, has not been seen with the hero recently. The public has speculated that the couple may have broken up and one source even claims that she was caught cheating on him.”

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me,” you muttered to yourself. For the most part, you didn’t mind the false news stories that went around, but that was so blatantly backwards that it hurt to hear.

“They really got it wrong on that one, huh?” a deep voice stated behind you. Surprised by the sudden comment, you spun on a heel to find yourself face-to-face with a tall, broad-chested redhead. Well, more like face-to-chest given the height difference.

“Kirishima? What are you doing here?”

“You stopped in front of my agency.” He pointed up. Wrinkling your brows, you stepped out from underneath the awning to look up. Lo and behold, there it was, a giant, bright red sign reading “Riot Heroes” across the top of the building. You felt a blush rise in your cheeks.

“Sorry, I was just passing by and stopped to watch the news,” you explained, gesturing back toward the screen, which had since moved onto more news about Deku.

“Of course, don’t apologize. Do you want to stop in for a cup of tea?”

“Oh, no, that’s okay.” Waving your hands in front of you, you took a couple steps backwards, out onto the sidewalk again. You had been headed home from work and you wanted to get going anyway. “I don’t want to bother you. Weren’t you just leaving?”

“It’s not a bother!” he insisted, flashing one of his massive smiles at you. “I was leaving, but what’s a few more minutes? Please, come in, come in.” He grabbed your arm with a surprisingly strong grip, pulling you along behind him, back into the building. As much as you loathed the idea of spending time exchanging pleasantries with your ex’s closest friend, Kirishima was a nice person and easy to talk to. You stopped trying to wrench your arm free and let him drag you.

Inside the building, large groups of heroes, sidekicks, and administrative staff were bustling about the lobby, everyone preoccupied with their own particular tasks.

“Wow, what’s with all the activity?”

“We’re partnering with Deku and Uravity for a few weeks to take down a villain that’s been active a lot recently.” He released your arm, walking a few paces into the chaos and turning back to ensure you were following. You hurried after him.

“Oh, woah, that’s a strong group you’ve set up.”

“Yeah, well, we all went to school together, so we like to team up whenever we can. I asked Bakugou as well, but he refused.” Instinctively, your heart skipped a beat at the mention of Bakugou. Your discomfort at the mention of his name must have shown on your face because Kirishima immediately went into apology mode. “Oh, God, I’m sorry. You don’t want me talking about him. Of course, you don’t.”

“No, it’s fine.” The two of you pushed out of the masses, finding yourselves in front of the elevators. Kirishima reached for the button. “How has he been? Bakugou, I mean.”

“In all honesty, pretty terrible.” A sense of pride swelled within you, overwhelming you with the satisfaction that he was at least feeling an ounce of the regret you hoped he was. The two of you stepped into the elevator. “He’s barely sleeping; we have to constantly remind him to eat regular meals; he’s increasingly irritable – and not irritable the way he usually is either, I saw him yell at an intern a week ago because they tripped and dropped some papers. It’s kind of hard to watch.”

“Good,” was all you said.

Ding! The elevator doors slid open on the top floor, giving way to the large room lined with floor to ceiling windows. The office was elegantly designed with sleek furniture and minimalistic design, but the ambiance was thrown off by the collection of training equipment in one corner and the occasional “manly” object scattered about. Deku and Uravity were already seated in the lounge area, Deku sitting properly in an armchair, while Uravity was sprawled about the couch.

“Kirishima-kun? Back already?” Deku asked, standing up. He was shorter than you imagined the top-hero to be, but from the looks of it, was pure muscle. His arms were probably the width of your thighs and his thighs looked like they were trying to rip free of his khakis, they were so big. He was definitely built for fighting villains.

“I caught this one outside the office.” Kirishima slapped you on the back, pushing you forward toward the other two. “Figured we could have some tea for a bit.” You walked with him up to Deku and Uravity, but felt yourself clamming up in their presence. You had spent plenty of time around Bakugou and Kirishima, so you were used to them, but Deku and Uravity felt too much like heroes in comparison. You idolized them so much, they barely felt like real people. “This is [Y/L/N] [Y/F/N].”

“Um, hello.” Wow, real eloquent.

“[Y/L/N]-san, why do I recognize that name?” Uravity mumbled to herself, sitting up from the sofa. She squinted her eyes at you for a moment before widening them suddenly. “Are you Bakugou-kun’s girlfriend?” You stiffened – as did Kirishima next to you. Uravity looked between the two of you, confused, but then pressed her lips together. “Oh, right, I heard about…um, yeah. Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you said stiffly, shaking your head.

“Well, I don’t think we’ve ever been properly introduced.” It was an awfully awkward transition, but she was trying to stray from an uncomfortable topic and you couldn’t help but appreciate it. “I’m Uraraka Ochako.” She held out her hand. Next to her, Deku stepped forward and held out his as well.

“I’m Midoriya Izuku.”

“I know who both of you are of course, but it’s nice to meet you.” You shook each of their hands in succession. Both of them had hero’s hands – a thing you noticed on both Bakugou and Kirishima as well – their palms rough and coated in callouses from years of rescuing others. Uraraka’s was small, but she had a firm handshake and Midoriya was exactly the opposite, a wide palm with a gentle grip.

Ding! Everyone turned at the sound of the elevator doors opening again.

“Alright, I changed my fucking mind,” a voice called. Oh no.

Bakugou walked into the office and directly made eye-contact with you, freezing just beyond the elevator doors. He looked exactly as Kirishima described him, weak, sleep-deprived, skinnier. His eyes were red and puffy from lack of sleep and the dark purple bags under them were no help. His t-shirt, which was usually completely tight, hung loose around his torso and the sleeves pulled away from his arms. Even just the way he carried himself seemed entirely unlike him, hunched and small, feeble in every sense of the word.

“[Y/N].” The name was soft, barely audible across the large room. He looked at you like you were a ghost and you could only imagine how you were probably looking at him.

“Bakugou, what do you mean you changed your mind?” Kirishima cut into the tension, releasing both you and Bakugou from the trance you’d entered as soon as you saw one another. Bakugou blinked a few times then walked up to join the group. You took a step back so you were standing between Midoriya and Uraraka. Something about being surrounded by those two was comforting, you weren’t sure if it was due to them being heroes or just the vibes they gave off in general, but something. They both glanced at you, but said nothing.

“I wanna join your ‘task force’ or whatever you fucking called it.”

“That’s great.” Kirishima glanced back at you. “How about you come back and we can talk about it then?”

“I’m not fucking leaving,” Bakugou retorted.

“Bakugou…”

“It’s okay, Kirishima,” you interjected. “I’ll just leave and you two can talk about it.”

“[Y/L/N], that’s not necessa-”

“Please don’t go.” To your surprise, Bakugou cut off Kirishima for one of the rawest displays of emotion you’d ever seen from him. Even after years of dating, you had never really since Bakugou expose himself in such a heartfelt manner until now. It was jarring. Midoriya and Uraraka shifted uncomfortably next to you. “I haven’t seen you in so long, let’s just… I don’t know, let’s fucking talk.” The last time you two had met was when he came to move his stuff out of the apartment. Unfortunately for you, you saw his face at the top of every other news story. You were plagued by his presence every day of your life, no matter how much you wanted to never see him again.

“There’s nothing to talk about, Katsuki.” And it was true, you had nothing to say to him. You weren’t even sure you were really angry anymore, disappointed and a little sad, maybe, but not angry. You were spent, no energy left to waste on tiring emotions that only wound up hurting you more.

“Please, just give me ten minutes,” he insisted.

“There’s nothing to discuss. All that would come out of us talking is you feeling better about yourself, that your actions are somehow justified.” You stepped out and past him. “I’ve said all I need to say.” Turning toward the others, you bowed briefly as you headed back to the elevator. “Thank you for inviting me, Kirishima. Maybe we can have tea another time. And Uraraka-san and Deku-san, it was a pleasure to meet you.” Pressing the down arrow, you stepped into the elevator. As the door slid shut, you made eye-contact with Bakugou for a brief instant to see the longing in his eyes, but the next moment the doors were closed and you were gone.

[noona-clock]

Turning Point

Okay! Idk but I feel like basketball and JiSoo go together… so surprise us!

Basketball and Jisoo, it is @sweg-imsorrywhatwasthat!

Genre: AU/Fluff

Pairing: Jisoo x You

By Admin B | 3,531 words

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

When you heard the morning bell ring, you slid your phone into your desk drawer, closing and locking it before heading to the doorway of your classroom. Teachers were required to stand out and monitor the halls in the mornings as well as greet their students as they walked in.

Just as you arrived at your door, the teacher next door sauntered into the hallway, hands in his pockets as he whistled a jaunty tune.

“Morning, neighbor,” he greeted you, taking one hand out of his pocket to wave at you.

“Good morning, Mr. Kim,” you replied, trying to hide a smirk. You two had been teaching next door to each other for a few years now, and there had always been some low-key flirtation going on. I mean, how could there not be? Mr. Kim, or Jisoo as you knew him when the kids weren’t around, was not only super friendly, smart, and hilarious... he was definitely the most good-looking teacher in the whole school. His smile got you every time, and you always wondered if it was obvious or not.

“Another day, another morning bell, am I right?” he asked with a sigh.

“You got it. And here they come now.” You nodded down the hall toward the first students arriving. One headed into your classroom, smiling and murmuring a ‘good morning’ to you, while two others headed next door to his classroom.

“Oh, hey,” Jisoo said, sounding kind of excited. “Are you coming to the game tonight?”

Jisoo was the school’s basketball coach, and while you were expected to go to at least some sporting events, basketball just wasn’t your thing. You usually chose to attend soccer matches or hockey games instead.

“I dunno...” you replied, scrunching your nose a little. “What time is it?”

“Starts at 7. I don’t think you’ve been to one yet this season,” he pointed out. “You’ve got a couple students on the team, I know they would love for you to be there.”

Before you could make an excuse, one of those students approached your doorway. Jisoo called out to him, gently grabbing his shoulders as he arrived and turning him to face you. The poor guy looked so confused, but then Jisoo said, “Convince your history teacher to come to the game tonight. That’s your mission for today, okay, Bobby?”

“Got it, Coach Kim!” Bobby gave him a little salute before heading into your classroom. 

“Make sure you turn your paper in, Bobby,” you reminded him, chuckling when he gave you a thumbs up to show he’d heard you.

“Come on, just one game,” Jisoo pleaded, clasping his hands together to show just how desperately he wanted you to come.

And, honestly... how could you refuse that?

“I’ll think about it.” You really didn’t care about basketball, so that was the best you could offer for right now.

A wide smile spread across Jisoo’s lips, and your heart jumped. Just then, two female students entered your classroom, one of them shyly greeting Jisoo with a “Good morning, Coach Kim.”

“Morning, ladies,” Jisoo replied with a nod. The girls both giggled before hurrying into your room and finding their seats. Jisoo was popular with the teachers, yes, but he was also popular with the students. It seemed like one-half of the student body had a crush on him, and the other half just wanted to be him.

“All right, the second bell is about to ring,” you stated, glancing at your wristwatch.

“Promise you’ll at least try to come tonight? I’ll keep bothering you about it the whole day, you know that, right?”

“Yes, I know, and yes, I promise,” you chuckled. “Have a good day, Coach. And... try not to yell so much today?”

“Okay, you know I’m not yelling at the kids, though! I just get a little overzealous about psychology.”

“Hey, I’m not judging. You know history really oils my gears. It’s just distracting for my students while they’re trying to learn about the American Revolution.”

“Oh, I’m the distracting one? What about you with that rap music you play?” Jisoo smirked, crossing his arms over his chest.

“It’s Hamilton!” you defended. “And it’s extremely relevant to my curriculum, thank you very much.”

“It is,” a passing student agreed as he walked into your classroom.

“See?” you quirked an eyebrow at Jisoo, and it was now extremely difficult to hold back a smirk.

Jisoo opened his mouth to issue a rebuttal, but he was cut off by the second bell. A few straggling students started running, and you raised your eyebrows at them in warning. But you still let them come in without penalty.

And just before you closed the door, Jisoo stuck his head in your room. “Come to the game tonight, okay, have a good day, bye!”

You shook your head, chuckling to yourself as you made your way to the front of your classroom.

“All right, history buffs. So, yesterday we --”

“Ms. Y/L/N,” one of your students, Wendy, called out. “Sorry to interrupt, but... You should totally go to the basketball game tonight.”

You furrowed your brow, leaning against your desk and picking up your textbook, hugging it to your chest. “What do you mean? Why?”

“Because Coach Kim totally has the hots for you!” another student, Vernon, interjected. “I bet he would ask you out if you went.”

You felt your cheeks burning, but you secretly hoped they were right. Not that you would ever tell them that! “I highly doubt that, but this is not appropriate classroom conversation.”

“But, Ms. Y/L/N! You could be the Eliza to his Hamilton!” Wendy cried.

“Do you not recall that Hamilton cheats on Eliza for a whole year and then writes a pamphlet about it containing all the details?”

“...But, still! They stay together in the end!”

“Coach Kim would never cheat on you,” Bobby declared. “And he’s totally single, too. We’ve asked him before at practice. And when we’ve talked about you, he always seems like he’s eavesdropping extra hard.”

“Wait, what do you mean when you’ve talked about me?”

“Nothing bad! Just when we talk about all the cool things we do in class,” Bobby assured you with an angelic smile.

“Right, right... Can we get on with our lesson now?”

“Only if you say you’ll go to the game and talk to Coach Kim afterward.”

“What! You guys are ridiculous,” you laughed, slightly rolling your eyes.

“Come on! It’s just one game!” And suddenly a chorus of voices was urging you to go, insisting Jisoo really did like you, and the two of you would make such a cute couple.

“Okay, okay, fine!” You figured you wouldn’t be able to teach until you gave in, so give in you did.

Almost every student in your class cheered, some even clapping with delight. And then the inside door linking your room to the room next door opened, Jisoo’s face appearing with a suspicious expression.

“What’s going on in here?”

“Nothing! We’re just excited about history, right, class?”

Thankfully they all played along, nodding and murmuring their assent.

“Okay...” Jisoo clearly didn’t believe you, but he backed out and closed the door anyway.

“See, Ms. Y/L/N?” Wendy smirked. “We told you he likes you. He’s looking for any excuse to open that door and talk to you.”

“All right, so, yesterday we talked about the turning point of the American Revolution which was...?”

Your students let out a collective sigh, disappointed to be off the subject of teacher romance and back on to history. “The Battle of Saratoga,” they answered unenthusiastically.

You stood in front of your closet, biting your lip and trying to decide what to wear. But what does one wear to a basketball game? You figured most people probably wore sports-related attire, but celebrities always seemed to wear more fashionable clothing. Then again, you certainly weren’t a celebrity... So you reached into your closet and grabbed your hoodie with the school logo on it and your favorite pair of jeans.

Even though you honestly were going just for Jisoo, you didn’t want him to know that. If you dressed up enough, he might get suspicious and ask why you looked so nice for a mere high school basketball game. And then you would get all nervous and start stuttering and he would think you’re weird and never want to talk to you again.

...Okay, you had to calm down. You were fairly certain your students were just making things up. I mean, yeah, you and Jisoo had always been kind of flirtatious, but... He was just friendly! He would probably be like that with whoever taught next door to him!

But, still. You spent the whole drive back to school daydreaming about Jisoo asking you out. And you made sure to find a spot in the bleachers where you knew he would see you.

Yes. You were just a little desperate. But whatever.

You waved to and chatted with fellow teachers as well as students, urging Ally, the orchestra teacher who was far more basketball-savvy than yourself,  to sit with you and help explain everything.

When the team came out, you stood with everyone, clapping and cheering and trying not to holler when you saw Jisoo following the boys in a sharp looking suit. Oh, great. Now you would look like a bum in your hoodie and jeans!

“Wow, how good does Jisoo look?” Ally murmured into your ear as the national anthem played through the speakers. 

You simply nodded, though you felt your cheeks burn. And when everyone sat down again, you leaned over toward her and chuckled. “My first period this morning seems to think he has a crush on me, so they basically forced me to come tonight.”

“Good,” Ally replied. “It’s about time one of you guys made a move!”

“What?! What are you talking about?!”

“You two have liked each other since the day you met! ...Haven’t you?”

You stammered a reply, though you honestly weren’t sure what you even said back to her... 

Had you liked each other since the day you met? I mean... I guess you could say you hadn’t not liked him since you’d first laid eyes on him. But had he really liked you?

Ally obviously sensed your discomfort and awkwardness because she didn’t bring it up again... though she did notice when you were watching him rather than the game, and she didn’t do anything to break your attention.

You managed to get the gist of the game, with some massive help from Ally, of course, but even when the ending buzzer rang through the gym... you could still safely say basketball was not your thing. But would you go to another game just to watch Jisoo pacing back in forth in his suit, yelling out to the players, smiling and clapping at every basket? Yes. Yes, you would.

As everyone was making their way down the bleachers toward the exit, you figured you would take your time... Just in case Jisoo hadn’t noticed you in the audience. You said goodbye to Ally, who gave you a knowing look and slowly went down the steps.

“Ms. Y/L/N!” you heard someone call out. You could tell right away it wasn’t Jisoo, but whoever it had been had yelled your name pretty loudly. He was sure to have heard. 

You turned, smiling when you saw Bobby waving at you. You waved back, trying not to notice his coach standing right behind him.

“Good job tonight, Bobby!” you told him, giving him a thumbs up. And rather than be obvious and say hello to Jisoo, you simply turned around and started walking toward the exit.

You were starting to regret your decision to not be obvious when you reached the parking lot, but you then heard some footsteps coming up quickly behind you.

“Hey, neighbor,” you heard. You paused, doing your best to keep from smiling like an idiot as you turned around to face Jisoo.

“Hey,” you replied, hoping your smile was friendly instead of flirty.

“You came!” He stopped in front of you, hands in his pockets as he grinned down at you.

“I did. Bobby succeeded in his mission,” you chuckled.

“How’d you like it? Did you have a good time?”

“I did, actually,” you admitted. “But it’s still not my favorite sport.”

Jisoo lifted his hand up to his chest, clutching his heart as if you’d just put an arrow through it. “Man, that hurts. I’m trying not to take it personally, but...”

“No, no, it has nothing to do with you,” you laughed. You almost told him he was the main reason you actually did have a good time. “But I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings.”

Jisoo kind of raised an eyebrow at you, suddenly looking intrigued. “Hmm... Well... I think I know what you could do to make up for it.”

Your heart started beating just a bit quicker, and you shifted your weight a little nervously. “Yeah? What’s that?”

“Meet me for ice cream?”

And then your heart started beating even faster. “Ice cream? I mean... how can I refuse ice cream?”

“Exactly,” Jisoo smiled. “Just let me go home and change so I don’t stick out like a sore thumb.”

“But you look so nice!” you replied immediately.

Jisoo blushed a little, looking down at the ground and obviously hiding a smile. “Well, thanks. I mean, unless you want to go change so we can make it a fancy occasion...”

“Ice cream in formal wear? Hmm, maybe another time,” you teased.

“So, Two Scoops in... half an hour?” Jisoo asked, his eyebrows raised expectantly.

You smiled up at him, nodding. “Sure.” You watched him jog over to his car before heading to your own vehicle, a huge smile plastered on your lips.

You headed over to the popular ice cream shop, Two Scoops, even though you had some time before Jisoo would get there. But there was nothing wrong with sitting in your car and playing on your phone.

When you pulled into the parking lot, however, you spotted quite a few students, including Bobby and Wendy. Wait, were they dating or something? Usually, you were good at noticing these kinds of things...

They saw you, too, so you knew you had to get out and say ‘hello.’

“Ms. Y/L/N!” Wendy cried, waving enthusiastically.

“Hi, Wendy,” you chuckled, walking up to the small group of teenagers.

“What are you doing here?”

“...Getting ice cream, what else?”

“By yourself?” she smirked, giving you a knowing look.

“It was a good game, wasn’t it?” you asked, patting Bobby on the shoulder. 

You talked with them for a little while longer, though you tried to get away so maybe they wouldn’t be around when Jisoo came. But, of course...

“Coach Kim!” Wendy cried, looking behind you. “What a coincidence!”

“Coincidence?” Jisoo asked as he approached the small gathering, now wearing jeans and a t-shirt rather than his coaching suit. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, it’s a coincidence that you’re here at the same time we are and at the same time as Ms. Y/L/N.”

“Oh,” Jisoo laughed a bit awkwardly. “Yeah, imagine that. I guess we just both crave ice cream after sporting events. While you’re here, though...”

Jisoo turned to you, looking innocent and shrugging his shoulders. 

“Right, I mean... We definitely have a lot of teacher things to talk about so, we might as well,” you replied, hoping your cheeks weren’t bright fuchsia. 

You heard some giggles emerge from your students, so you decidedly avoided them and turned toward the ordering counter.

“Have fun on your date -- I mean, your meeting,” Bobby said with another one of his angelic smiles.

You simply narrowed your eyes at him over your shoulder before turning back to look at the menu.

“Sorry,” Jisoo whispered. “I shouldn’t have picked a place so close by.”

“No, it’s fine,” you whispered back. Although you knew your whole first period class would know about this within the first five minutes of the day.

After you two ordered your ice cream, you headed outside to find a table, choosing to enjoy the cool night air (and get away from your students).

“Thanks for coming,” Jisoo said after you sat down across from each other.

“To the game or to get ice cream?” you asked, digging your spoon into your mint chocolate chip.

“Both,” he smiled. “Though I can’t believe it took you so long to get out to a game. The season’s almost over!”

You were about to reply apologetically, but then you realized something. “Hey... how do you know I haven’t been to a game yet?”

Jisoo froze for a second, shifting his gaze to his ice cream instead of you. “I... uh... I mean...”

And then he let out a sigh, setting his spoon down and looking directly at you. Your heart stopped.

“Because I’ve been wanting you to come. I always look for you, but I’ve never seen you.”

You let out a breath, though you hadn’t realized you were holding one in until just now. “Why didn’t you ask me earlier?”

Jisoo let out a soft chuckle as he shrugged. “I don’t know... I wanted to, but...” He shrugged again. “I don’t know.”

“Well...” you gulped nervously, hoping you didn’t sound too awkward. “I would’ve come if you’d asked me.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I did tonight, didn’t I?”

“Yeah, I guess you did.”

“So what made you ask me today?” you inquired, your forehead slightly wrinkled.

Jisoo ate a couple spoonfuls of ice cream as he thought. “I’m not really sure. Maybe it was because you wore your purple dress today.”

“My purple dress?” you chuckled. “What does that have to do with anything?”

“You just... look good in purple.” He smirked as he focused on his ice cream, and you felt your cheeks start to burn.

“Well,” you started, clearing your throat. “You look good in anything.”

“Oh, stop,” Jisoo scoffed. But then he smirked over at you. “You really think so?”

You two continued to flirt as you ate your ice cream, and Jisoo did his best to make you giggle and blush. When your cups were empty, you slowly made your way to the parking lot together, heading toward your car.

“I swear! If ‘Prettiest Teacher’ was a superlative in the yearbook, you would definitely win. It’s student-voted, remember? So many of my guys on the team have crushes on you,” Jisoo assured you, hands in his pockets as you ambled along.

“They would not,” you retorted, nudging him with your shoulder. 

“Okay, but you’ve won Best Dressed three years in a row, so they obviously think you look nice.”

“What about you, then? You would win ‘Best Looking Teacher’ easily. You hear how all the girls giggle when you say something to them.”

Jisoo smirked, the expression on his face clearly saying ‘I mean... I’m not disagreeing with you...’

“And so many guys look up to you.”

“Yeah?” he asked, turning toward you as you arrived at your car.

“Absolutely. You’re the cool teacher, no doubt about it.”

“The cool teacher,” he chuckled softly. “What about co-worker? What kind of co-worker am I?”

“You’re a cool co-worker,” you assured him.

“And... what kind of date am I?”

“Is this a date then?” you asked with a shy smile.

“If you want it to be. I want it to be, but if you don’t, we can just pretend it never happened --”

“No,” you interjected. “I do. I want it to be.”

Jisoo took a step closer to you. “What kind of date am I, then?”

“You’re a cool date. A funny date. And... a very cute date.”

A smirk pulled at Jisoo’s lips, but it wasn’t a smug smirk. It was more of an ‘I can’t believe you just said that’ smirk. “You really think I’m cute?”

“I believe I said very cute.”

“Oh, I apologize. You really think I’m very cute?”

You smiled up at him, feeling the butterflies start to form in your stomach. “Yeah. I do.”

Jisoo opened his mouth to say something... but then he froze. But then he opened his mouth again. “Are the kids still in there?” he asked. You were facing the shop, so you leaned over, looking around him and trying to spot your students.

“Yeah, they are.” You quickly hid behind Jisoo again, not wanting them to notice you were there.

“Damn,” Jisoo whispered. “I would really like to kiss you, but...” Obviously not in front of students.

Your cheeks burned as you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, glancing at him nervously. “Well. Maybe next time, then.”

“Next time?” Jisoo asked hopefully.

“Just don’t pick somewhere we could see students,” you laughed.

“Hey, what about a basketball game? Like, a real one. If we sit close enough, we could probably get on the Kiss Cam.”

You laughed again, shaking your head slightly and rolling your eyes. “Good night,” you said, opening your car door.

“Good night, neighbor. See you tomorrow.”

Oh, yeah. Tomorrow was a school day. 

Well. This was going to be interesting.

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6

Master list // RULES // Submit a Request! // Read About the Admins

[mazqueen]

I wish Petra would use the word “bisexual” in an ep. I kinda love the fact that most queer characters on JtV doesn’t have to say their sexuality but it just is (like Luisa and JR never use a label but are so obviously gay). But since some people keep calling Petra a lesbian, and that the word bi is like never used on tv, I think she should. Characters that are obviously bi either have no label or call themselves gay, sometimes even when writers confirm they’re bi they still won’t say it in canon

Me too. And I agree, it’s nice when they don’t have to say their sexuality because then it’s treated as normal, which is a good thing. But at the same time, I feel you in that the term bisexual is rarely used on tv and I feel like saying the word… helps, I guess? In validating it, in a sense, for bi-visibility, especially because there are a lot of people who don’t take bisexuality seriously or never even consider it as an option. 

I mean here. We’ve got Luisa, Rose and Krishna, all confirmed lesbians. JR’s sexuality was never said out loud in canon, but people have labelled her as a lesbian and no one has questioned it. And then there’s Petra, who I feel is actually in the best position (and the only viable one, at this point) to represent the bi community on the show especially now that she’s a confirmed wlw + her history. It all fits, and comes together quite perfectly. However, there are still a lot of people who say she’s a lesbian, who dismiss the idea that she’s bisexual (which Jennie Urman has confirmed she is btw) even though she spent pretty much three seasons pining over her ex-husband and it’s clear that her love for him was real, both in the writing and the translation of that writing onscreen. And it can feel a little offensive in a way, if you think about how there are 5 wlw (counting out characters who aren’t at the very least recurring guest stars) on this show and out of those five, (out of the two unconfirmed wlw), the bi community is only trying to claim ONE as our representation and when people try to argue against the idea of Petra being bisexual, it feels like we’re not even allowed to have that, like we’re not even allowed to exist in the line-up of wlw. 

And idk. I mean I want Petramos to be endgame. I want JR to be it for Petra, because I think they have a healthy, loving relationship and that’s beautiful. But at the same time, it’s upsetting when her ending up with a woman is taken as her being a lesbian. The thing is, unless you’re poly, you’re only gonna end up with 1, either a male or a female… but it’s not like ending up with a male makes us hetero, in the same way that ending up with a female does not mean we’re lesbians. We’re still bisexuals. And I feel like that was the whole point of why they made Adam explain all that stuff about bisexuality earlier. So that people understand that. But I don’t think people do. 

Like, here’s the thing. Bisexuals who like men and women equally are valid. Bisexuals who prefer men are valid. Bisexuals who prefer women are valid. Bisexuals who have never dated men before are valid. Bisexuals who have never dated women before are valid. Bisexuals who have decided, for whatever reason, that they want to exclusively date men are valid. Bisexuals who have decided, for whatever reason, that they want to exclusively date women are valid. In the same way that bisexuals who don’t want to date at all, for whatever reason, are valid. (And bi’s who would rather call themselves straight/lesbian because they want to exclusively date only one sex anyway is also valid, js. What people want to label themselves as is their choice.) 

It’s tough to make definitions with sexuality because it’s complicated, so this will be extremely broad but bisexuality generally means you can be attracted to both men and women. And I’m not talking about attraction in the… oh they’re handsome or beautiful kind of way, but in the sense that… you’d enter a relationship with them, or would have sex with them, or whatever other variety of that. Like, the idea of being in a relationship, romantic/sexual, with either women and men appeals to you. Sexuality is really not about who you’re with or who you end up with. It’s not about who you’re dating or not dating. You don’t stop being a bisexual for any reason, because being one is part of who you are. Like someone who is closeted and dating the opposite sex is still gay even though they’re dating the opposite sex. Because being gay is not something that disappears depending on who they’re with. It’s who they are. It’s the same with bisexuality.

And so in the same sense, Petra is bisexual no matter who she’s dating. Petra is bisexual if, for some reason she doesn’t end up with JR and dates ten women after that until she finds ‘the one’ who is also a woman. If she dates women the rest of her life, it doesn’t negate the validity of her feelings/relationship with Raf. She could be so over balls men (like me 99% of the time) but that doesn’t automatically make her not a bisexual. Mind you, being ‘over it’ means she was into at one point, which just goes to prove that her attraction isn’t limited to only women. Like… I can see Petra as fluid. And I can definitely see her as pansexual. But if you tell me Petra is not at all attracted to men? Idk but that’s just difficult to believe. And I’d also like to point out that Jennie made the decision to make Petra bi before s4 started… and yet we have a completely pointless scene in which Petra gushes about how handsome Jeffrey Mullins is, also being hot and bothered and clearly turned on at the thought of how good Raf is in bed and if she was going to make Petra a lesbian? Why bother with those.

And. Yeah. Clearly I have a lot of feelings about this lol. And I mean, it’s about Petra but it’s also, in the larger sense, more about the prevalence of bi-erasure in society as a whole and tbh I feel a little bit like invalidating Petra’s bisexuality is a manifestation of that. And I just wish we could be better. Like I’ve said before, we’re all wlw, all lgbtq, let’s just be supportive and accepting of each other.

[shaww93]

Okay....

The other day. Well. Yeah. We've been having problems ever since we came back and I'm sure I've been sharing it from time to time and for some reason over the weekend, or maybe it's the build up or keeping it in for too long or not being honest and sharing with A how I feel. But I have shared with him. The things that have been going on between us is nothing new. Just the same old same old.

The thing was idk what day it was.. Friday night? Everything was going alright that day and then I made a comment that triggered him and he got mad at me for not owning what I said? When really I just didn't want to fight that night and day after he was mad at me the whole day. Barely spoke to me and when I kept asking him if he was okay, he said he was fine but didn't say anything else.

I knew he was mad at me for that but I mean.. why do I have to be the one to bring it up first? I asked him throughout the day if he was okay. He should have spoke up about it if it was bothering him so much. So nighttime comes and finally we talk about it and he asked me to go to the other room and when I got up to grab my stuff and go he just got all pissed that I couldn't just own up to my words and apologize. I was like seriously? You're mad about this.. it's such a small matter. Like I really don't have the energy to keep fighting like this.

The next day... Actually... I feel like I'm not remembering the days correctly. No this is right. The next day. Didn't talk again and I finally couldn't handle it anymore. So I went over to him and apologized for that day and the night before for the fight. Then we talked about it and we were okay.

The next morning... he had this dream of me and just kinda went off on me saying I cry too much and that I'm useless and that every dream he has of me is never good or he doesn't have a catharsis. He told me how he didn't care if I stayed or if I left, which made me feel like... why am I still with him? I mean he has no desire to stay with me or no desire to keep me. It doesn't seem like he needs me either so why should I try or want to be with him. So I told him that I think what's best for us is that we just end it and move on. He kept asking me what I was going to do and I hate when he asks because he says I'm still his responsibility since I'm here by myself. I just told him that I was going to move closer to work and stay for another year and then maybe move back home. And idk. He was like if you already thought of this then go. Pack your stuff and get out of here.

I told him I have no where to go because we're in lockdown and no one is renting out their place right now. Where should I go? And he just kept saying how he was done being nice to me and then his friend called. I told him I wanted to go for a walk and just that whole time during the walk I felt so ready to give up. I was done fighting for this and if he didn't feel the same way as me and feels like we can't be happy together then I wanted to end it.

I finally went to the temple on the corner of the neighborhood and prayed that we would both be okay or that if it comes to it that I would be okay.

I walk back to 7 and he calls me and tells me he wants to talk with me. So I told him that I still wanted to keep walking and he said okay. Then he calls me again and says he really wants to talk to me so I told him to give 5 mins and I would be back.

I go home and I walk in. He immediately apologizes for how he's been. After talking with his friend, he realized how supportive I've been for him. I keep him grounded or I never put any unrealistic expectation for him and he kept trying to complicate my feelings for him and I told him that I simply love him unconditionally and he silently nodded.

He told me that he never wanted me to leave and that he sees me being with him in the next phase of his life. That when it was the two of us in the States I was his support system. 100% was me. Me and him against the world. He told his parents that he wouldn't have came back here if I didn't go with him. And now that he's here, his support system has widen to his parents and his friends. But he still wants me to be by his side because unlike his mom and his sister, I don't tear him down, I've always been supportive to him and that is a trait that he values about me.

So. Idk. I don't see a life without him either. Idk if he feels that way. I mean he said it himself, if he didn't want to be with me he would have screwed around in China but he didn't. Which is true. He had the opportunity to and hide it from me but he called me everyday like he said he would.

Do we fight like old couples? His words. Yeah we do. I swear we just spend wayyy too much time together. I told him that I just was not ready for this role of being a daughter-in-law. I felt like our fun time was cut so short. We were only together for a year before the lockdown back in the States and then when we got here it got serious way too fast. He left for China shortly after and then I started working and then he left for China again and now we're in lockdown. We've mostly spent all that time in lockdown together watching movies, tv shows, or playing game. Not really having our own life outside from the two of us and yeah.. Of course we would constantly be fighting. We're not really growing.

I love my husband. I picture myself having kids with him and I know he does too. The other day he was talking about how our kids will have broad shoulders since we both have broad shoulders. And I just see hope whatever is going on right now is just a phrase. I mean... I've talked to some people about the first year of major and it seems rough. We're actually almost there... our anniversary is next month! LOL i wonder if he remembers? Actually we have a lot of dates... that I seem to only care about and remember. But 8/20 and 12/8 are our anniversary date. Former is the states one and latter is the one here. And if we have another wedding, that's another date XD

It was an emotional weekend. Crazyyy weekend.

He has a very boyish smile. It's very cute. Idk why but I also love watching him clean. I love how focus he gets and I love how gently he is when he puts stuff away. Sometimes he'll pat stuff like towels or bedsheets to smooth it out but it's so cute. Okay.. I also love his hands... Haha. They're very meaty and a little rough but also very nice to hold. I also like how he lets me slip into his arms and lets me spoon. or when he brings my pillow over to him so that I can also comfortably cuddle with him. or how he'll let me rest on his chest... and I sometimes drool and he won't say anything.

He's... ugh. He's not here right now and I want to hug him. Nuzzle my face in his chest which he hates haha, but he still lets me do it anyways :3.

Okayyy this is getting too long and I didn't even say the main point of the previous post. Me praying.... Did god change his mind? I mean obviously my husband, with space and time, he realizes his mistakes and will apologize. But... I just also wonder and maybe I'm naive or want to believe an external force changed his mind? Are we fated to be together, I mean stay together? Or is A just truly in love with me that he wants to make this work no matter what?

[fwancus]

Untitled

(A short fic based on Day 1 of the Writer’s Digest Two Weeks of Daily Prompts e-book. yes, judge me.)

Pairing: USxUK (Not in any order)

Tags: Divorce mention, not very sad though, idk

Alfred slowly sat up from his shared mattress, looking over at the sleeping blonde man beside him. Arthur was normally someone who would bring a smile to his face no matter what, but as of recent times, enjoyment was something that Alfred was having difficulty finding with his husband.

 He stood up firmly from the bed, his toes curling from the cold hardwood floor, and reached over to pull his shirt off. He walked slowly over to the bathroom, sighing along with the creak of the shower faucet as he ran the water. Stepping inside, he allowed himself to stand beneath the stream, his head hanging low. The water was much too hot, but he didn’t mind to lower it. Nothing could sting his skin as much as what he was about to do.

 He cleaned himself, the washcloth leaving raised red scratches over his skin as he tried to scrub the regret from his skin. Tears streamed from Alfred’s eyes, he knew that Arthur would not take this well. After six years of marriage, Arthur would not take this well at all.

 He turned, twisting the faucet handle down and sighing as the pounding water reduced to a stream, growing thinner and thinner until only crystalline droplets fell from the rainwater shower head. When he stepped out of the bathroom, Arthur was still sleeping, but his change of position was indication that he’d be up soon. Instead of nudging him to consciousness, Alfred dressed himself quickly in a loose white t-shirt, smoothing out the v-neck before stepping into black jeans. He kicked on a pair of shoes, grabbing his phone and glasses and stepping out of the bedroom.

 Downstairs, he leaned against the kitchen counter, looking at the cookware around them. They had built the kitchen together, quite literally from the ground up. It was an outer addition to the house, they had raised the walls together. There were arguments, but they were silly fights that the couple laughed about now. It was a beautiful outcome, despite their differing opinions on interior design. He shook the thoughts from his head, knowing from experience that hesitation would only make this worse. He grabs a muffin from the microwave, walking out the front door and down to his car.

 He drove to his work at a local coffee parlor, sighing as he tilts his head back as he waits in the rear staff parking lot. He unlocks his phone, sighing as he sees a text from Arthur. 

“Hey. You left early for work, everything okay?”

 Alfred halted slightly as he thought of a response. His options were to lie, and say that he was fine, only to surprise Arthur with the breakup text during lunch break because he simply can’t bring himself to do it in person; Or, he could send aforementioned breakup text now. He decided on the latter.

 “Arthur. I’m not sure if you’ve been able to tell, but lately it’s been really difficult for me to enjoy time spent with you.” Alfred read over the message, sighing and backspacing until only ‘Arthur’ was left. Too harsh.

 “Arthur, I love you. But I can’t do this anymore.”

 No, too cliche.

 “Arthur, I want to breakup. It’s not you, it’s me.”

 Way too cliche.

 Alfred began to think. Lord knows thinking is not a good thing to do at this hour of the morning. Nevertheless, he was thinking that if it was so hard to think of a way to breakup with Arthur, should he be breaking up with him in the first place? Alfred shook his head, pounding the thought away immediately. He had known he wanted this for several months, nearly a year, and hesitating would only lead to more misery and a much more violent outcome.

“Arthur, we’ve known each other for almost seventeen years. We met in high school, and for how much we fucked with each other, I think we both expected it to end in marriage. But what neither of us could have expected on the day we signed our vows six years ago, is what I am about to say.” There we go, that was sounding better. “I value you as a person, you have a sense of humor, no matter how hard it is to believe that; you have a lot of tact, and you can sense when I’m a bit down; and if I didn’t say you were hot as hell, I would be lying. Because you are hot. You have one of the most gorgeous bodies and personalities that any man could ever ask for, and I thank you for sharing it with me for the time that you did.” He sighs, and tears began to bead at his waterline.

“But I don’t think marriage was the right choice. I think we rushed it. We were engaged at fifteen, way too young, and the second we turned eighteen we began to finalize things. Neither of us ever really stopped to think about the commitment that marriage is. I thank god in these recent days that all of the conversations we had about adopting kids ended in ‘no’, because I’m breaking up with you. I’m not leaving, god no, I want to continue knowing you for the rest of my life. But I can’t be in a romantic situation with you anymore. And I know texting this to you is a sucky, douche thing to do, but I couldn’t bring myself to tell you up-front. We can talk more when I get home.”

Alfred’s thumb faltered over the ‘send’ button, and he reread the message nearly ten times. He tried to imagine how Arthur’s face would twist when he read it, trying to comfort himself, but he quickly found that the image was causing adverse effects. He sighs, pressing his finger down, watching the message pop up into the chat and a small ‘D’ appear next to it for ‘delivered’. And he also watched as that ‘D’ turned into an ‘R’ for ‘read’, and he immediately shoved his phone into his pocket to avoid Arthur’s immediate response. But it was too late.

 “Come home. Now. I need to see you, please.”

Alfred sighed, looking at his dashboard for an excuse. Maybe he would tell Arthur he didn’t have enough gas to go back and forth, but his tank was over 3/4 full. He could say his boss gave him strict hours today, but Arthur knew his boss and he also knew that he was way too relaxed to be strict on his employees. His mind scrambled for reason, anything - anything - to avoid Arthur’s tearful eyes. But he couldn’t.

 “Okay. On my way.”

Alfred was silent as he drove, trying to think of what he would say to calm Arthur. But he didn’t need to. When he got home, Arthur wasn’t bawling on the couch as he had expected. Arthur was sitting, looking at a photo album for sentiments, one leg folded over the other. He looked fine.

“Arthur?”

 The man looked up, smiling, but with a sad undertone. “You know, I can’t say I wasn’t expecting this. You really don’t hide your feelings very well.”

 Alfred paused. “What?”

 Arthur rolled his eyes, shaking his head. “Come on, what am I supposed to think when you turn off the TV during breakup scenes in movies, or change the conversation when I joke about it at dinner? It was obvious that you were feeling this way, especially when I asked you about adopting and you almost screamed at me not to. That’s not what you would normally do.” He sighs, looking down, “I’ll admit, I did think you’d be mature enough to talk to me about this face-to-face, but I can understand why you didn’t.”

 Alfred frowned, rubbing the back of his neck. “Art, I’m sorry. I really am, but whenever I thought about saying it in person, I knew I wouldn’t be able to do it and it would only further my silence and make things worse. I’m sorry.” He looks up with a bit of bittersweet hope, “Are you saying that…you’re okay with this?”

 “Oh, lord no.” Arthur sighed, “I’m devastated. No matter how much I knew it was coming, I couldn’t brace my heart for the impact those words had on me. I’m scared, I am, of living alone after all we’ve been through. I’m not okay with this at all, but I can’t force you to be with me.”  Alfred frowned. There it was. “Well, you know, this doesn’t mean that we’ll, like, never talk to each other again. I told you that I still want to be friends. I don’t want either of us to be completely alone in life.”  Arthur slowly nods, sighing. “Who gets to stay here?”

 The question was abrupt, and Alfred wasn’t expecting it. “Uh, to be honest, I really like it here. It’s not that far from my work, so I don’t waste a lot of gas. And to be fair, you work from home, so…” Alfred trailed off, knowing that Arthur understood what he was asking.

 “Alright. If I can’t find some place by the end of the week, I’ll rent the couch in my brother’s house for a few nights. He’ll just have to deal with it.” Arthur sighs, “But that nice complex opened just around the corner last month, I’m sure they must have a vacancy or two. I can find a flat there.”

Alfred minded to correct ‘flat’ to ‘apartment’, but knew it would do no good in the situation. “Yeah..If you want any furniture, you can have the love seat and one of the coffee tables. You can also have your desk, obviously, and I’ll buy you a new dining table. And I’ll move it all. It’s the least I can do to apologize…”

 Arthur smiles a bit. “That’s a hard offer to accept, but I think I deserve it. You ended six years of marriage with a text, and then kicked me out of a house that I helped build.”

Alfred laughed, knowing that Arthur wasn’t seriously upset and meant the statement as a joke in the first place, shaking his head. “Yeah, I’m kicking you out. Fuck the end of the week, I want you out by 2 o’clock this afternoon.”

Arthur smiles, shrugging his shoulders and looking to meet Alfred’s eyes. “I’d say I’m going to miss you, but for one I know you won’t leave me alone for the next few months, and two, your humor isn’t something to miss.” Arthur grinned, and Alfred pouted and crossed his arms.

 “Heyyy, that wasn’t a very nice thing to say.” Alfred waved his finger back and forth in a mocking manner, and Arthur smiled.

 “I’ve said a lot of not-very-nice things, and you’ve never seemed to mind. Don’t give me that bullshit.”

  Alfred only smiled, “Well, I’ll miss you, even if it’s not requited.”

[uniformbravo]

“quick” life update while i wait for my ipod to charge

(do ppl even still use ipods in this day & age. whats spotify)

i never made any posts abt it but i started the new semester & im taking 2 classes, it’s funny actually bc i waited even more til the last minute than i usually do to figure out my classes & spent the 1st week of school trying to see a counselor to find out if i still needed classes and that’s a whole other story for a whole other day but long story short the answer was no but i decided to take a couple anyway

mainly because every time im not in school The Depression takes over & i just needed something to Do so im taking intermediate painting (even tho painting 1 made me want 2 die every day) and animation (even tho i’ve already decided i don’t want to be an animator????)

so heres the thing, okay, since these are classes i don’t need in order to fill any requirements or anything i had to pick them based on nothing, really, like my main reason for taking classes this semester was to give myself something to do, right. i picked painting because my friend had told me she was taking it so i was like yo i’ll just do that too bc we had fun last time & it’s a good way to stay in contact. originally that was gonna be my only class bc i knew it’d be a lot of work and time but then i talked to my school’s art counselor about transferring to another school after im graduated from here and i’d said i was maybe interested in storyboarding so we looked at schools with animation programs and i decided super last minute to just take the animation class here and Boy what a mistake

last semester i was talking on here about a computer art class i had considered taking but dropped bc it seemed kinda... shitty?? because i hated the way the teacher taught and i felt like i wasn’t gonna gain anything from the class??? well animation is taught by the same guy and hhhhhhhhh he’s so fucking unhelpful it’s such a nothing class

see i was hoping to learn some hand-drawn animation basics like timing, squash & stretch, the fucking bouncing ball assignment, shit like that, right. the teacher was like “today we’re gonna go over the 12 principles of animation” and i was like “sweet i’ve heard of that this’ll be good” & literally he brought up a list, read off most of the names, briefly described a few, and told us to google it if we wanted more info like?? holy shit dude????? thanks for nothing oh my god

i’ve been taking a lot of time practicing animating in flipnote studio on my 3ds and watching youtube videos and i’ve been learning so much more from that than anything explained by my teacher bc godddd. basically what the class boils down to is like. flash animation. so far we’ve been working in adobe illustrator and animate & i cannot stand illustrator. i know it’s a good and useful program and if i wanted to i could learn how to use it & eventually get used to it but just the way he teaches it makes me want 2 slam dunk my computer

the computer art basics class was strongly recommended to be taken before this class but tbh i don’t even think that’s the issue here because i tried to take that class and his method was the same; he does a demo on screen that you’re supposed to follow along and do with him and he explains what hes doing as he goes but he goes so fast that if u miss a step ur fucked 

and it’s not just that he goes fast, it’s also that theres no understanding of the program itself, like ok u know how in math there’s all these formulas where if u just plug numbers into them it gives u the right answer? i always understood formulas better when i knew what each variable stood for & why the values were being added or multiplied together because then it made it easier to extract the information i needed from word problems and also helped me memorize the formulas themselves easier because i could make those associations between numbers and purpose. i had the groundwork of the formula, so i could apply it to all kinds of situations

this class is like, he only gives you the very specific formulas required to accomplish very specific tasks in the programs so i can’t make the connections to figure out how to perform other tasks and i get super lost every time & it’s super frustrating & i could ask for help because he comes around and helps people who need it but i sit in the back corner so he never really even looks my way so i feel like i can’t get his attention w/o speaking up or getting up to go get him & i get lost so often that it’s really just a pain to ask him every single time

i just hate when i have a problem in one of the programs & i just have absolutely no clue how to fix it or even work around it? im used to photoshop and illustrator is just so opposite that my brain doesn’t want to work with it so im. 100% floundering in this class

we have 2 assignments during the whole semester, the first was a group project where we hand draw a 3-second animation (~30 frames) and that was literally the very first thing we did in the class with no prior guidance and honestly i suspect that the only reason he assigns it is to fill the requirement for a group project (which i know is a thing bc a lot of my past teachers have talked about it being a thing) so it was literally just. a nothing project

the second assignment is our final which is a 90-second animation (~1080 frames) and we have basically the rest of the semester to work on it, so about a month and a half-ish? and all we’ve learned how to do so far is motion tweening in animate, basically. i mean we did a ball-and-string thing which was kind of different but it mostly involved a lot of copy+paste bullshit in illustrator & also like automatic shortcuts & stuff, there was really no drawing involved at all

also it’s one of those classes where everyone just kind of messes around and does their own thing like?? i saw one girl reading manga on her computer & these two dudes at my table were comparing yugioh cards & i hear like 50 thousand conversations about anime every day & i mean im not one to talk tbh but it’s just the atmosphere, it feels like u either know what ur doing or u just fuck around w/ ur friends and im in the “neither of those” category and the girl who was reading manga is in the “both” category bc every other time i’ve looked over there she’s got this amazing masterpiece on her screen that she made in illustrator & i die inside every time what the fuckkc 

he showed us examples of final projects from last semester and i noticed that some of them were done traditionally or in programs that were obviously not illustrator so i asked him about it & he said it doesn’t have to be done in illustrator/animate as long as it’s 90 seconds long so Guess What i think i’m just gonna make it somewhere else lmaooo i mean i feel like it’s a missed opportunity bc i have these programs at my disposal & im not even using them but god amn. god fuckign damn

im thinking of animating it in flipnote bc that’s what i’ve been using & im pretty familiar with it by now but im not sure because there are some important things im not sure i’ll be able to accomplish with it like backgrounds (which are another requirement for the assignment) and i don’t want to back myself into a corner, especially with how little time i have to do it, so idk for sure. my other idea was to use clip studio paint but i have the pro version which only lets u use 24 frames per animation which totals out to a whopping 2 seconds so idk if i want to have to deal with that bullshit either. right now im considering making the rough animation in flipnote so i can figure out the timing & shit and then slapping it into clip studio to finalize everything (or technically i could even do that in photoshop, since im more familiar w/ it & can probably work faster there- from photoshop it’d be a matter of copying the finished frames into clip studio to export into 2-second clips & then compile those in movie maker & then bam finished animation)

so!!! it’s a lot of shit im dealing with in this class & im just like. if im doing it this way then why do i even need to show up for class. what am i even in this class for im just basically making an animation on my own time with my own resources using none of the techniques taught in the class. im only doing this animation because it’s an assignment for the class im not gaining anything from. it just seems so pointless & the only thing getting me through it is the thought that i could possibly put this in a portfolio somewhere down the line, and for that i’d want it to look nice and not rushed so im thinking that for the sake of finishing the assignment i might just use my rough animation so that i can spend more time on the “nice” version afterward

aaaanyway it’s um Late for me & i went on about this for too long but i needed to get it off my chest tbh, i’ve been thinking abt making this post for like 2 weeks so there u go. i didn’t even talk about my painting troubles good lord. if you’ve been wondering why i havent been online as much lately This is why. also bc im a huge loser and 100% of my free time has been going into watching anime bye