#but yeah my dad is gonna have to organize a flight down and i know that despite being short of breath my grandad was able

[andromedasummer]

finished my crochet cup holder and sewed up lunas ears, head and sewed them together and have started on crocheting a cactus which is pretty damn good considering i spent nearly all of saturday sleeping to recover from work and the family emergency happening rn

[spine-buster]

peaceful easy feeling ft. b.boeser | two

A/N: Thank you guys for all the positive feedback on Part One!  I’m so happy you guys are enjoying the series thus far.

CONTENT WARNING: parents with disease/sickness (Parkinson’s); swearing; sex; alcohol use; lots of emotions.

                                                                  *     *     *     *     *

Brock Boeser was intoxicated by the feel of Grace’s lips.  It was all he could think about and all he could feel every time he was alone and closed his eyes.  Well, that was a lie – that wasn’t all he felt.  Sometimes he could feel the weight of Grace’s body on his lap, like when they would make out like teenagers on each other’s couches after hanging out or before hanging out or during hanging out – any time, really.  Sometimes he could feel her long hair sprawled across his chest from when they lay in bed together.  Sometimes he could hear her giggle or see her smile or hear her voice being the kindest, most polite and gentle person on planet Earth to everyone and anyone she’d meet.  

For what it was worth, Grace Gillespie was intoxicated by the feel of Brock’s body.  It was all she could think about every time she was alone, and she found herself dreaming about the next time she’d be able to feel it.  His strong arms with his toned biceps; his abs, defined by a work schedule and sport that took up most of his time; his thick thighs…but what she loved most had to be his back.  It was weird for her to say, but it was.  It was the definition – she could see every muscle.  She could trace every bump with her fingertips and make him shiver.  The entirety, all of him, was just so…beautiful.  

It was Grace who had inadvertently given it away, so to speak – them seeing each other – when she uploaded a story of herself at the Canucks season opener.  The rumours started in no time.  The story was screen-recorded and posted on every blog imaginable because Brock Boeser was, well, Brock Boeser.  He was hot, and nice, and sweet, and every girl in Vancouver with even just a passing interest in hockey wanted to hook up with him.  It was also compounded by the fact that in the 90s the Gillespie’s put in a bid to own the Canucks.  Grace just tuned it all out.  Brock Boeser Dating a Billionaire’s Daughter!  Those who loved alliteration must have loved the headlines.  In any case, there were more important things to worry about, and more important things to dedicate her time to.  

Grace was at work when she got a call from Brock.  That meant the team flight had landed and he was probably still at the airport or had just gotten into his apartment.  She liked how her heart skipped a beat whenever he called.  “D’you want to meet some of my friends?”

That question took her for a loop.  “Who?”

“My friend Elias, but we call him Petey.”

“You mean Elias Pettersson?” she clarified.  

“Yeah,” he giggled slightly.  “He’s been fancying himself a chef lately.  He lives with his best friend Svea.  He wants us over for dinner.”

“Is he making Swedish food?”

“Don’t know.  I’ll confirm with him.  But is that a yes?”

“Well, if he’s cooking…”

***

“You told her what?”

“Petey—”

“Boes, I can’t fucking cook!” Elias exclaimed once it dawned on him what Brock had just done.  “Why would you invite her here?!”

“I wasn’t thinking—”

“Clearly not!”

“What’s all the commotion?” Svea asked as she emerged from “her side” of the apartment, hearing the screaming between the two men.  It wasn’t exactly new, to hear Brock and Elias screaming at each other, but it was usually over video games.  This sounded like something different.  

“Brock just invited his new girlfriend over to our place for dinner,” Elias huffed.

Svea furrowed her brows.  “What’s wrong with that?  We’ve been wanting to meet her for a long time, Elias.”

“Brock said I’d be cooking,” Elias deadpanned.

Svea turned to Brock with an emotionless look on her face.  “Are you dumb?!” she exclaimed.

“Sveeeeeeaaaaaaaa,” Brock pleaded, his hands clasped together, about to get on his hands and knees in front of her.  

“You need to fix this Svea.  I can’t – I can’t – I can barely even boil an egg!  What made you think I’d be able to cook a dinner to impress a girl I’m not even trying to impress?!” Elias demanded.

“Shut it, the both of you,” Svea said sternly, raising her hands slightly.  “When is she coming here?”

“Saturday night, after our game against Toronto.”

She took a deep breath.  “I’m going to make sausage stroganoff.  You better bring me a good bottle of wine,” she glared at Brock, “and you better go to the Swedish bakery to get the good Swedish sausage,” she directed towards Elias.

Brock fell down to his knees.  “Thank you Svea.  Thank you thank you thank you.”

“Yeah yeah,” she waved them off.  “Now if you’re going to play video games, keep your voices down.  I’m studying.”

When he heard her shut the door to the den, Brock looked at Elias.  “When are you gonna marry her?”

Elias huffed.  “She’s my best friend, Brock.”

***

“So they’re best friends from Sweden,” Grace wanted to make sure she got everything right before she met Elias Pettersson and Svea Nilsson for the first time.  “But you’re saying they’re in love with one another and don’t know it?”

“Exactly,” Brock nodded his head.  “You’ll see it within, like, a minute of meeting them.  They’re just…I don’t know, dumb.”

Grace giggled slightly as Brock pressed the number for Elias’s floor in the elevator.  The doors shut and soon they were speeding up.  “Does anyone else on your team know about us?”

“Some of the guys I’m closer with do,” Brock said.  “Troy, Thatcher, Marky…they all know about you.  Do your friends know about me?”

Grace snorted.  “I told them about you after that first night at Starbucks.”

Brock laughed, leaning down to give her a quick kiss.  “That eager, eh?”

“When you know, you know,” Grace said.  “You know, don’t you?”

Brock nodded.  “I know.”

That was the beauty of what they had going.  They just fell in to everything.  There was Starbucks, then there was exchanging of their numbers, then there were texts back and forth, and phone conversations, and the rush of everything else.  It was quick but it was organic.  Nothing was rushed.  They were going at the pace they wanted to go.  There wasn’t even a heart-to-heart sit down or discussion about “where they stand relationship-wise” or “Am I into this more than you?”.  It was just…understood.  They knew.  They were exclusive.  Neither was seeing anybody else.  Neither wanted to see anybody else.  It was what Grace knew a healthy relationship should blossom into.  It was what Brock knew he wanted from another person.  

Elias opened the door to the apartment, greeting Grace sweetly before walking them in to the kitchen and dining room, where the table had already been set – no doubt done by Svea, too.  Grace noticed that Svea, the roommate, was the one cooking instead of Elias, and she was absolutely mortified.  She made sure to make her way into the kitchen once Brock punched Elias in the gut about something.  

“Hi I’m Svea,” Svea introduced herself sweetly as she was whisking a sauce in a deep saucepan.  She had on an apron and everything.  “It’s really nice to meet you.  I’m sorry that I look like a mess right now.”

“I’m so sorry – Brock said Elias was cooking tonight because he fancied himself a chef – I didn’t want to put any pressure on you—”

“Oh no no no!  Don’t worry!” Svea waved her off.  “God, are you kidding?  I wouldn’t want Elias to make you anything.  He might give you food poisoning.”

Grace giggled.  “So what’s on the menu tonight, anyway?”

“Sausage stronganoff,” Svea replied.  “It’s a Swedish dish.  Elias’s favourite, actually.  I thought I should make you Swedish food.  You’re not vegetarian, are you?”

“No,” Grace said, smiling from ear to ear.  “Sounds delicious.”

***

“They’re definitely in love,” Grace said once she and Brock walked out of the front doors of Elias’s condo building.  Brock turned towards her dramatically, his eyebrows raised, about to throw his arms up in the air.  “It’s so obvious.  So obvious.”

“I told you!” he exclaimed.  

“Why aren’t they dating yet?” she asked.

“Beats the shit out of me,” Brock said, shaking his head.  “But they’re meant to be together.  It’ll happen eventually.  I just don’t want to wait until I’m, like, forty to see it.”

Grace smiled, and there was a moment of silence between the two as they walked along the street.  “Can I ask you a question?  About things happening eventually?”

“Sure…”

“D’you want to meet my dad?”

The words hung in the air as Brock considered the magnitude of what Grace was asking him.  “You want me to meet your dad?”

Grace nodded.  “I think he’ll really like you,” she began.  “And my dad always, always wants to meet my boyfriends.”

“So you’ve had loads of other boyfriends?” he quipped.

Grace went to punch him in the gut, much like Elias did just hours earlier, but Brock dodged her easily and ended up grabbing her hand instead.  “Of course I’ll meet your dad,” he said, softer this time, as he stepped into her personal space and wrapped his other arm around her body.  “I’d love to.”

“Listen, I know I don’t have to warn you about what you’re gonna see when you get into the house, but—”

“Shhhh…” Brock cooed, bringing a finger up to her lips before leaning down to kiss her.  “When you want me there?”

“How does Sunday Night Football sound?”

***

Brock had never seen such a beautiful modern mansion so big in his life.  He’d trekked up to North Vancouver, to the address Grace gave him, and came face to face with a mansion overlooking the water.  It was stunning.  Fit for a billionaire, Brock thought.  He wondered if Grace grew up in this house or if it was new.  It looked new.  And judging by its style –a bungalow – it was fit for someone who needed access to everything they needed on the same floor.  Someone living with Parkinson’s, of course.  

He rang the doorbell.  After about a minute, the door opened and an unfamiliar face greeted him.  “You must be Brock?” the woman asked, the door still only half-open.

“Yes ma’am.”

She opened the door fully.  “I’m Angeline.  I’m one of Mr. Gillespie’s caregivers,” she informed him, stepping aside so he could step into the massive foyer.  Brock could hear the TV on in the distance and the clinking of some dishes in a faraway kitchen.  “You’ll also meet Dana and Michelle, Mr. Gillespie’s others.  He’s been expecting you.  He’s been very excited to meet you.”

Brock slipped off his shoes, making sure not to drop the bottle of wine he brought (for reasons unknown; it wasn’t like Hamish could drink – it was just that him mom taught him never to show up to someone’s house empty-handed).  “Oh, really?” he asked.

Angeline nodded her head.  “He hasn’t been quiet about it since Grace said it to him.  Plus, he’s a big Canucks fan.  Let me bring you to him.”

Brock followed Angeline through the house until they got to the family room.  It was massive, like everything else in the house, with lots of space.  When he walked in, he saw Grace and Hamish.  Their backs were to him, so he was able to observe them before they saw him.  Grace was sitting right beside him in his chair, holding his hand as they paid attention to the football game just about to start on the screen.  Grace was making some comment about the teams.  Brock could see Hamish turn his head slowly to look at his daughter and nod.  Everything about the set-up – Grace, Hamish, their positions, what was on TV, everything – reminded him of he and his dad.  Even the handholding.  Brock didn’t think he even held his dad’s hand as much when he was a kid out in public than he had the last few months – few years, really.  Duke was really into the handholding.  Brock could never, would never deny him.

Brock was soon snapped out of his trance by the sound of footsteps.  One of the other caregivers walked right past him holding a plate of puréed food, bringing it to Grace.  It was only then that Brock noticed the TV dinner table beside her.  “She likes to feed him whenever she’s here,” Angeline said, noticing Brock’s staring.  “If you need any help you can always call.  We will be somewhere in the house,” she said before walking away.

Brock took a deep breath and walked towards Grace and Hamish.  Upon hearing his footsteps, Grace looked his way.  The smile on her face widened ten times over when she saw it was him.  “Hi Brock,” she said softly, getting up from her seat quickly to greet him.  She kissed him quickly behind her father’s back (quite literally) before moving and settling back into her chair.  “Dad, Brock is here to meet you.”

Brock stepped into Hamish’s line of vision.  So that he wouldn’t have to strain his neck to look up, Brock bent down on his knees.  “Hi Hamish,” he held out his hand for a handshake.  Slowly, Hamish’s hand came up to shake it.  “It’s very nice to meet you.  Grace has told me so much about you.”

“It’s…nice to…meet you…too,” he said, his words coming out slowly but surely.  “You…like football?”

Brock smiled.  “I love football.”

“Minnesota?”

“Minnesota.”

A smile crept onto Hamish’s face.  “Good.”

***

Hamish wanted ice cream, so Grace got up and went to the kitchen, leaving him with Brock as they watched the football game together.  Minnesota was winning, which made her dad pretty happy.  And despite everything, she could tell he liked Brock.  She knew he would – everybody liked Brock, he was the sweetest – but it made her happy knowing that he liked him.  There were some ex-boyfriends of hers that he didn’t like.  Some ex-boyfriends he straight-up disapproved of.  Hamish had strong opinions and vocalized them always, and the Parkinson’s didn’t stop that.  He didn’t create a three-billion-dollar company by being quiet.

When she finished putting the ice cream in the bowl, she began to head back to the family room.  Dana stopped her momentarily to tell her that her dad’s bed was ready, whenever he was tired and needed to change into his pajamas.  Grace thanked her, and before she could even step foot into the family room, she heard Brock’s voice.  “Back straight, Mr. Gillespie.  And let me get the straw.”

She stopped in her tracks so neither could see her.  She watched from the side as Brock took the glass of water her dad had been drinking with dinner and brought it up to his lips, steadying the straw so it faced him.  “Take your time, Mr. Gillespie.  It’s alright.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, Mr. Gillespie.  I’m used to this.  I’m not sure if Grace told you but my dad has Parkinson’s as well,” Brock said.

Hamish seemingly forgot about the water and straw.  “He does?”

“Yes sir.  And I help take care of him too, in the off-season.  Just like Grace helps take care of you.”

Hamish brought a hand up slowly and placed it on Brock’s arm that was resting on the arm rest.  “Does your father…ever speak…of his body…betraying him?”

Grace watched as Brock took a deep breath in.  “All the time,” he nodded.  “Ever since he got diagnosed.”

Hamish nodded slowly.  “You and Grace…” he began, “taking care…of your parents.  You’ll…you’ll look after one another.”

Brock nodded again, more assertively this time.  “We will,” he said, bringing the water and straw closer to Hamish.  He pursed his lips to start drinking, and Brock brought his other hand up to steady Hamish’s head and make sure it was as upright as possible.  Hamish’s hand didn’t leave Brock’s forearm.

[bahorell]

Les Amis (& co.) and what they’re like camping

Enjolras: Is kinda scared of the woods. Also he’s that guy that really has a hard time putting his phone down because “I just have to respond to this one email”. “Yeah give me one second I’m dealing with a work thing”. “omg did you hear about what’s happening in Canada? It’s horrible those poor people” “Enj the point of this is to get away from everything for a couple days” “Right I know…”. So if there’s even one bar of service they gotta go find a different place. When he isn’t on his phone he’s very active in all his friends activities. He’s not super outdoors-y so he mostly tags along when other people do things. He’ll have Baz or Courf take him on rides on their paddle boards. He’ll tag along when Chetta and Ferre go on hikes. He’ll be Feuilly’s little helper person when Feuilly’s working on building the fire. Or he’ll just hand out with people at camp or on the beach of the lake/river and just talk.

Combeferre: Loves camping because of all the bugs and critters! Found the tiniest little frogs on the shore of the lake one time and made everybody look at them. Brings plant and animal and bug ID books with him and will take little leaves or flowers and stick them in the pages of the book when he thinks he found a match. He doesn’t usually snack too much when he’s at home but when he’s in the woods he is always eating something and it’s really when he’ll let himself just go balls to the wall with the junk food. The only thing he doesn’t really like about camping is that he doesn’t get to go on jogs in the morning because he’s smart enough to not run into the woods in the middle of nowhere with no service by himself.

Courfeyrac: Has an inflatable paddle board that he bought! He likes to play lifeguard and will paddle around to all his friends who are swimming and give them rides to shore. He likes to share his paddle board with his friends but he didn’t have enough money to buy a super super fancy one that has a large weight capacity so usually if someone else is on it with him it sinks into the water enough to stress him out. Also he shares a big tent with Combeferre and Enjolras and he likes to sleep in the middle of the two of them.

Joly: Invested in a super super cute small teardrop camping trailer a couple years ago. It’s easier for him to get in and out of than a tent or god forbid a hammock (Bahorel has to lift him into it then Joly wants to get in one… this is also partially because Bahorel sets up all the hammocks and they are p much impossible to get in unless you are also 6’7”) The inside of the camper is just a bed and the back hatch opens up to cabinets and drawers and a counter and stuff that makes a nice little make shift kitchen. He’ll set up the camp stove and the cooking area right next to it. He’s not super involved in any of the cooking it just gives him less stress when the food area is organized and the table legs are on a flat surface.

Jehan: Jehan tells the ghost stories. They aren’t very good at telling ghost stories so nobody really gets scared (except for Marius and if they’re really doing a good job Enj will get a little spooked). They also wake up with the sunrise so they’re up and ready to start the day at like 5am… and they really aren’t quiet about it so they manage to wake up 2/3 of everybody else at camp. Has more dietary needs than other people so when every one gets together to build a grocery list and meal plan for the trip they’ll make their own list. They really don’t mind because they HATE sharing snacks so having their own little baby cooler all to themselves is the best. Bousset: Somehow manages to have the most amazing balance and can get on and off Bahorel or Courf’s paddle boards like it’s nothing but when he gets in the canoe with anybody they somehow always tip it over within like 20 seconds. He is the opposite of Jehan he’ll sleep until like 2 in the afternoon if one of them doesn’t come to wake him up. He’s also usually in charge of getting all the booze together for the trip bc he’s very aware of what everyone likes to drink. He takes turns with Chetta sleeping in the trailer with Joly since not all three of them can fit. When he’s not sleeping in the tent he’s sharing a tent with Grantaire.

Feuilly: Fire guy. Loves the fire. Is always excited for the sun to go down so he can start the campfire. Will not take his eyes off the fire. I mean seriously. They once played never have I ever and when it got to be his turn they timed him to see how long it would take for him to realize it was his turn bc he was too busy staring at the fire to pay attention (it was a solid 4 minutes). Sleeps in a tiny little one person tent that would make anybody else claustrophobic but he LOVES it. He does set up a hammock right next to Bahorel’s. He doesn’t sleep in it but the two of them will take naps together in their hammocks. He also has to dowse his body in SPF 10000000000+ because he’s the whitest person ever, and somehow he still manages to get a sunburn on some part of his body.

Bahorel: He’s the guy thats super picky about the camp spot. “eh i mean this one is cool but it’s a little too close to the other campsite and I don’t wanna be that close to other people thats the point of this trip is to get away from everybody.” “This one WOULD be perfect but it doesn’t have good access to the lake so it’s gonna be hard for those of us that have boats to get down there” “Bahorel the boat ramp is like 1/8 of a kilometer away we can just walk down to that…” “i mean we COULD… but it just kinda sucks” Also Bahorel has this super nice hammock system with like a bug net and a rain tarp, he will not sleep on the ground because he is scared of bugs and also the baby boy likes getting rocked to sleep. He always follows Feuilly around when he’s looking for a place to put his tent and he’ll set up his hammock right next to him. And he WAILS to Feuilly when they get back home because his SKINCARE ROUTINE GOT MESSED UP FEUILLY OHHH MY GODDDD

Grantaire: Not super big on camping but if he’s with his friends he’s having fun. There’s something about being in the woods that makes him quiet… but not in a sad way. He feels really peaceful when he isn’t dealing with a bunch of people in a big city (Even tho he loves the city). He always brings stuff so that he can draw or paint the mountains or his friends on the lake but he usually doesn’t get enough time to really make anything more than a sketch. He’s not scared of water but he avoids going in the lake if it’s not a part of it that’s deeper than his tummy. He won’t get in the boats unless there’s a lot of coaxing (usually by Enj)

Marius: LOVES being in the woods. I mean really loves it. Surprisingly it’s usually Marius that sends out the text to the group chat that’s like “hey is everybody free in a couple weekends? I wanna go camping!” He just really doesn’t like going by himself or going with just one or two people. He wakes up super early as well and usually will sit with Jehan and share coffee waiting for everybody else to wake up. Sometimes the two of them will go on a little walk together. He winds down pretty early in the evening though since he wakes up so early and is usually ready for bed by like 8:45pm. He’s also that guy that wants to eat all the berries on the bushes they walk past and has almost given Combeferre a heart attack like 7 times.  

Eponine: She’s… alright to camp with. She gets kinda grumpy in the mornings because of how cold it is but she warms up (both temperature wise, but also her mood) once she’s eaten and it’s gotten warmer out. She really just likes to lay in one of the communal hammocks and read book after book. She’ll also tag along with Gavroche on a lot of his little adventures. When she’s not with Gavroche or letting Combeferre show her all the little bugs and cool plants he found, she just sunbathes. For HOURS straight. Going camping for her is just a really long fun weekend to get her tan on.

Cosette: She’s so fun to camp with!! She’s like… the best person to camp with. She always does the planning and researches everything there is to do at and near the campsite. She knows all the hiking trails nearby and what areas have service and which ones don’t. She knows which campsites have lake/river access. She also makes the best camp coffee. It’s really the only time she drinks coffee unless it’s like… finals week or she’s got an early flight or something. She also ALWAYS has to tell her dad where they’re going. She shares her location and route with him on the drive there and texts him to let him know she’s about to lose service and texts him the second she has a bar of service. He’s just very protective and she wants to make sure that he knows she’s safe. Plus if anything DOES happen he knows where she’s going and can come save the day.

Musichetta: She sleeps like the entire time she’s camping. She’ll wake up in the morning and move from her tent or the camper and go lay in one of the communal hammocks near the fire ring and doze off with her hot chocolate… which she has spilled a couple times. Once it warms up a little she’s walk down to the lake or river and lay down, get her tan on, and take a nap. One of her favorite things is to go on hikes with Combeferre. He’s one of the only people in the group that can keep up with her. If they go with other people usually by the time they reach the end of the trail the rest of the group is about 2 miles behind them. One of the best parts of camping for her is going home and showering after not showering for like 3 or 4 days.

Gavroche: Spends the entirety of the first day trying to find the perfect tree to put the perfect swing on. He also likes to try to find any big rocks near the campsite and go bouldering and run around on top of them. He still really has that childhood curiosity about everything and no fear. He’ll run off trail trying to find deer or elk. If he doesn’t get back home with a couple scratches or bruises he doesn’t consider it a good camping trip. He also will swim out to Bahorel’s paddle board and Bahorel will grab him out of the water and throw him back in. Gavroche thinks it’s the most fun thing in the world even though he’s growing really fast and it’s taking a little bit more muscle every year for Bahorel to throw him as far as Gav wants him to.

[ofcowardiceandkings]

I think you mentioned listening to podcasts? Do you have any favorites to reccommend? I've run out of content :(

that i do !

im not entirely sure what kind of podcast you'd be interested in but i'll throw out a few of the goodies in my huge library of stuff , i'll miss out a few of the HUGE podcasts that have been all over tumblr though

a LOT of it is true crime or human interest stuff , or history because im nerd ,, and a few of these dont have nearly enough attention so [shrug] i'll try to keep this short i guess lol this isnt EVERYTHING ive got in my library or listened series' by any measure

i AM gonna pop a shout to both Stuff You Missed in History Class and Stuff You Should Know from iHeartRadio because their HUGE archives have kept me from losing my mind many times over , and they cover a wide range of both important and wacky topics

BomBARDed (ongoing) this is the only fiction podcast i have happening right now really but its DAMN GOOD ONE .... it's an actual-play D&D 5E podcast in the DMs own musically-inspired world, focussed on a group of multiclass bards going to music school !! and all players (+DM) are members of the Texas band Lindby !! and they actually use and play music in the show with one original song an episode !! Kyle's worldbuilding and storycraft are truly incredible, and (Nick) Goodrich, (also Nick) Spurrier, and Ali's characters are in depth and interesting as well as an absolute powerhouse :') i actually made a piece for its first fanzine, Bardic Dreaming, which published earlier this year and is free to view now, all the players and the community are super wholesome its just very good overall 💙

History & Humans;

Fall of Civilisations (ongoing) legit one of my favourite podcast finds, im so glad my youtube autoplayed one of these ... it took me like 2 hours to realise it was 1) not the same as what was playing before and 2) had been on for 2 hours and wasnt near finished lmao. anyway, this is a series by historical fiction writer Paul Cooper, and is honest to all thats good one of the best documentary series ive encountered in years - and ive consumed a LOT of documentaries. it covered the downfall of various civilisations through history, and the episodes run from an hour to FOUR hours depending on the topic. its so chill to listen to and just get done, but over the pandemic all of the episodes have been given full movie-quality video versions too on youtube if youre more of a visual person.

Casting Lots: A Survival Cannibalism Podcast (on series break) yeah that says that lol ... its a SUPER niche topic but its very interesting and treated very well despite being kind of comical at times, the hosts are just naturally funny lol ... it delves around from the history of cannibalism in whole regions to specific incidents as recently as the 1970s, and of course the first episode is about the Donner Party, and it covers things ive never heard of despite being kind of important ?? anyway Alix and Carmella are good eggs

Sawbones (ongoing) i probably dont need to mention much here other than say that Justin and Sydnee saved me from being SO BORED sooo often, the history of medicine is wacky as hell and its what most of my history GCSE was on so [shrugs]

Cautionary Tales (on series break) this was a wild-card find lol ... it's by Tim Harford "the undercover economist" who writes for the Financial Times, and its topics kind of weave modern topics and science with how to learn from historical errors ... its a bit weird but well worth a go, also each series has a few celebrity guest voice actors which is pretty awesome

Ephemeral (ongoing) this is a very strange but thought provoking series about sounds and other things just barely saved. topics include the last castrato, the hello girls, hand-stamped records, the spread of kīkā kila music, and acoustic fossils of wild places.

Neat! The Boozecast (ongoing) history and bartending whats not to like lol ... hosted by Teylor Smirl and now their dad Tommy, they're just digging around in how important booze is to human culture

True Crime (white collar and weirdness);

Swindled (ongoing) this is an amazing show full stop. A Concerned Citizen details some of the most impactful and unruly things to happen in white collar and corporate crime. very factually accurate but given the sheer bullshit of the topics the deadpan snarking is [chefs kiss] absolutely warranted ..

American Scandal (on series break) this one is a series within a series type, and spends a few episodes at a time poking holes in some of America's biggest scandals, from a dramatised but fact-based point of view. such as what the hell was going on with Enron, how big tobacco was forced to own up to covering its own ass, how Iran-Contra happened, etc. it also now has a sister show called British Scandal, which does the same thing for British cases but with a slightly different format.

Missing in Alaska (finished) this was a fascinating series, a deep dive into what happened to two US government officials who disappeared on a small chartered flight in Alaska in 1972. it goes some really strange places, but it actually turned up a lot of previously unknown information through the audience. John Walczak's new series in a new feed is Missing on 9/11 which looks into what happened to Dr Sneha Philip.

Pretend (ongoing) Host Javier Leiva holds interviews with anyone living a lie, or who have been touched by them. con artists, snake oil salesmen, former cult members, catfishing victims, anyone and everyone.

Power: The Maxwells (finished) hosted by journalist Tara Palmeri, the story of media tycoon Robert Maxwell from nothing to empire to mysterious death and the scandals uncovered after he was gone.

Lets Talk About Sects (ongoing) Sarah Steele covering cults from around the world, in particular those in Australia - where she is from. She often has former members on the show to share their stories, and share knowledge of how they left. each story has the relevant content warnings at the start of each episode.

Brainwashed (finished) investigation of the CIA's covert mind control experiments, centred on the experiments performed at a hospital in Montreal, and its cultural impact.

Dr Death (2 series finished) two series investigating huge cases of fraud and medical malpractice, and how they were brought to a stop. series 1 covers Dr Duntsch and his horribly butchered neurosurgery, series 2 covers Dr Fata and his fraudulent cancer clinic

The Immaculate Deception (finished) untangling the weird and disturbing fertility fraud of Dr Jan Karbaat, who fathered children himself through his fertility clinic, and the impact of his deception. later episodes also touch on other similar cases.

True Crime (Violent/General);

The Casual Criminalist (ongoing) Simon Whistler of-the-many-youtube-channels cold reads a script about the case of the day, with some of his daft commentary thrown in.

Southern Fried True Crime (ongoing) Crimes from the American South hosted by Erica Kelley, she puts all the facts out there but refreshingly for true crime she doesnt hesitate to tell you if she thinks someone is human garbage lol

They Walk Among Us (ongoing) probably one of the most popular UK crime podcasts, very measured and well put together, not weird or annoying about it either.

All Crime No Cattle (ongoing, feed slowed down for now) specifically about crimes from Texas, hosted by Erin and Shay, they're very sensitive hosts and a lot of the cases they cover shed light on why the Texas criminal system is how it is or show an impact at a national level

Canadian True Crime (ongoing) Canadian crime from an Aussie who's lived there for a decade, Kristi is again a sensitive and measured host covering some important topics

True Crime (Violent/Deep Dive);

Hitman (finished) journalist Jasmyn Morris digs around in the sticky tangle around a book published by fringe publisher Paladin Press, and its apparent use as a blueprint in the killing of a mother, her friend and her 8 year old boy for financial gain.

Camp Hell: Anneewakee (ongoing) this series is exploring how a wilderness camp "correctional facility" was endorsed by the Georgia care and juvenile reform system, despite widespread abuses and shady practices the whole time. warning for csa and child cruelty throughout.

True Crime Bullshit (on series break) this one is a huge huge rabbithole but a very interesting one where the host Josh Hallmark has spent years digging into the life and potential crimes of Israel Keyes. Keyes is often mentioned as a serial killer with no pattern, but in picking it apart thats not quite true, and has sparked some re-evaluations of missing persons cases and stumbling upon information the FBI has redacted organically. there's also a series in the middle looking into the crimes of Kelly Cochran

Forgotten: Women of Juárez (finished) this series looks into the huge numbers of missing women of Ciudad Juárez, the strange circumstances surrounding them, and the potential cover-ups and corruptions on both sides of the border, trying to give a voice to all of the forgotten women and girls and their families without answers. the series itself is finished, but a spanish language edition is being released every week now.

aaaaaand i'll call it there before i list everything lol, i hope you find something to plug your boredom hole with !!

[cutie1365]

A Kid from Queens Part 21

Pairing: Peter Parker x Stark!Reader

Info: CA: Civil War Era. Tony Stark enlists his daughter to find the web slinging spider in Queens.

Word count: 5.4k

Warnings: 18+ content, smut, language. (I had aged up Peter so he’s 18.)

A/N: Flashbacks in italics as usual :) I know it’s been forever, motivation is hard to come by these days. This is the longest thing I’ve ever written, it’s long enough to break into two chapters but I know I haven’t uploaded in a while so Merry Christmas lol.

Any and all feedback is much appreciated! Please please if you could just leave a little message of things you like or what you want to see in the future it really helps.

Masterlist linked in my bio. Taglist in the reblog.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

“Y/N! Y/N! Over here!” You heard your name called as Happy opens the limo door. He extends his hand to help you to your feet.

“Stark, look over here!” The paparazzi screams were almost deafening as Peter exited the car after you. His mask hid more of his features while yours left little to the imagination, they knew who you were already, so no point in trying to hide it.

“Behave.” Happy pointed a stern finger at you.

“Don’t I always.” You feigned offense as your hand clapped over your heart, he raised a brow as your mouth turned up into a smirk.

“Goodnight Happy.” You chuckled, turning and stepping onto the red carpet leading to the venue.

“Who are you wearing?” You heard different questions screamed in your direction. This was a charity gala after all, not the fucking Oscars. Who cares who made your dress?

You slipped your hand into Peters, trying to calm him. This had to be overwhelming, all the cameras in your face, screaming anything they can to get you to look their way.

“Dr. Stark!” One voice called, gaining your attention. Few people addressed you with your appropriate title. You turned to see a young woman, who didn’t look like she’s been on the job for very long. She was holding her own though, against all these ruthless reporters. You thought you saw The Bugle among them.

“Dr. Stark, Glory Grant from the Times.” She smiled once you looked her way. You took a step closer to her, nodding at her to let her know you were listening and she could continue, “Can you tell us why this cause is important to you?”

“Of course, every child’s life we can save is like an investment into our and their future. They’re going to be the ones to take over the world someday. Who knows who will be the next Einstein, or Madam Curie...” You began with a smile.

“Or Y/N Stark,” She smiled. You laughed, shaking your head humbly.

“If we can do our part in donating and relieving some of the financial burdens off of their parents then it’s worth it. This organization not only helps families and children currently fighting cancer, but it helps look for a cure. A permanent solution to help end this disease.” You spoke from your heart.

“Thank you so much Dr. Stark.” She smiled as she scribbled the last of your words onto her notepad.

“Are you new at the Times Ms. Grant?” You asked, taking another step closer to her and the barrier between the two of you.

“Yeah, I just started.” She smiled nervously.

“Can I borrow your pen?” You asked, and she handed you her pen and pad.

“That’s my work number. If you’d like to be added to the Stark Industries press board, give me a call. They’re the first ones we call about press releases and announcements.” You spoke as you scribbled it down, handing it back to her with a smile.

“Thank you so much Dr. Stark, but why are you helping me?” She furrowed her brows.

“Because it's a man's world, and we can help change that, one woman at a time,” You said, causing her to laugh, “You’re the only one here to actually address me by my title and not ask me about my outfit. I see a bright career ahead of you.” You nodded to her as you took a step back towards the middle of the carpet.

“Enjoy tonight,” she smiled, beaming at the new opportunity. You winked at her as you took Peter’s hand and led him along the carpet and up the stairs towards the venue.

“That was nice of you,” He squeezed your hand.

“I mean it’s effortless for me, but it will help kick start her career. I got this kinda third eye about people.” You smirked.

“That’s not a real thing.” He shook his head with a laugh.

“Sure it is. It’s not always perfect, but sometimes I can just tell when people are destined for something great. Like you, from the moment I met you I knew.” You turned towards him, taking his other hand in yours.

“You knew what?” He titled his head in confusion.

You leaned in to press a chaste kiss to his lips, forgetting you were at the top of the stairs and still in full sight of all the photographers. You saw the flashes but you didn’t care. Peter’s identity was safe with his mask, and you wanted the whole work to know how happy he made you.

“That you’re a good person, and you’re gonna do big things.” You beamed up at him as you pulled away from the kiss, turning to lead him inside.

“So what else can this third eye tell you?” He asked curiously.

“It’s kinda like a gut feeling, to trust someone or not trust them. Like fight or flight, something’s not right kinda feeling. I just trust my gut, ya know.” You shrugged.

“I think I know exactly what you mean.” He said, and you turned to him with a raised brow before remembering your conversation from a week ago.

“Oh that’s right, like your spidey senses.” You chuckled, making sure to keep your voice low.

“My what?” His eyes went wide.

“You said you can sense when something bad's gonna happen. Although mine isn’t as specific and can’t be attributed to a radioactive spider.” You chuckled, walking to a secluded corner of the ballroom.

“Shh someone could hear you.” He whispered, you smiled, shaking your head, knowing everyone’s always drunk at these sorts of things.

Turning to face Peter, you raised your hands to straighten his bow tie. Your mind wandered to how great he looked in his suit. The feeling of butterflies swirling in your belly from the moment you saw him step through your door a few hours ago had barely worn off.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

“Wow,” you both muttered as your eyes landed on each other. You’d never seen him all dressed up like this. He looked good, really good. You gulped, trying to push the dirty thoughts from your mind.

His hair was slicked back, not the mess of curls you were used to. He looked so grown up. You could almost picture him commanding a Stark Industries board meeting or standing at the end of an isle. Wait- slow down Y/N, jesus.

He looked so natural, so dapper, and then he turns and gives you that signature goofy smile- there he is. It brought a smile to your face. How did you get so lucky? How could you have landed a guy as great and handsome as Peter Parker. Were the girls at his school brain dead? You would think everyone would want him. Kind, sweet, intelligent, respectful, and Christ he cleans up well. He was everything you’d ever dreamed of.

Have you just been staring this whole time? Jesus, Y/N say something, he’ll think you’re crazy, you thought.

“Are you ready to go?” You asked, trying to compose yourself. He only nodded, still not able to formulate words.

You were wearing red. His red. No- not his red obviously, but the same color of his suit. And god he loved it. He felt like you were wearing a piece of him. Like he had marked you, you were his.

“You look...” He trailed off, his eyes still wide. He cleared his throat and smiled, trying to compose himself. You could almost hear his internal monologue urging him on - Come on Peter, keep it together..., “You look... God Y/N. You look beautiful.”

“Thank you,” You blushed. Of course that wasn’t the first time someone had told you that, but coming from Peter it felt different, “You look so handsome. Not your usual kind of suit, huh?” You smirked, causing him to chuckle as he pulled on his sleeves.

“I have your mask.” You smiled, still admiring him, holding the mask out to him.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

“Why doesn’t your mask hide your identity?” Peter asked, as the two of you watched more and more people file into the ballroom.

“Because people will know who I am anyway, and I’m not hiding.” You explained.

“How will they know?” He furrowed his brows, you shook your wrist in response.

“I don’t know anyone else with a custom blaster built into a bracelet. I’m also on the younger side, and pulled up in a ride with Stark Industries plates, so it wouldn’t take a genius.” You smiled, starting to recognize a few faces of regulars as you people watched.

“Do you always wear that thing?” He asked, holding up your wrist and examining it.

“No, I’ve got a watch for day to day wear that does the same thing. Dad may not give me a suit, but he won’t leave me completely defenseless. And it has come in handy.” You trailed off, remembering the not so fond memories of the last time you used it. Your ribs still ached if you thought about it long enough.

“Let’s hope you don’t have to use it tonight.” Peter said, craving one normal night without having to be a hero.

“Someone would have to be very ambitious to attack this place, they’ve got security out the wazoo.” You brushed off, praying tonight would go well.

A hush fell over the crowd as the charity president walked onto the stage and welcomed everyone. You felt Peter’s hand slip around your waist protectively as everyone pushed a little closer to the stage to hear. This part was pretty standard, basically a little speech to kick off the  night, a thank you for coming, and who to make all checks out to. Music filled the ballroom as the band began playing after the applause for the speaker died down.

“I’ll get us something to drink.” Peter nodded off towards the open bar.

You nod as he walks off and turn to admire the ballroom. Your eyes soon land on a familiar face.

“Dr. Strange,” You smile, greeting him.

“Dr. Stark,” He nods. You’d met a few times at these sorts of events. You hadn’t seen him for a while though, and there were rumors of an accident.

“How are you Stephen? I haven’t seen you since...” You paused to trying and remember, “Was it that benefit for the hospital a year ago?”

“Had to be, I’ve been... traveling.” He stated ominously. You glanced down to see the long thin scars along his fingers.

“Well it’s nice to have you back.” You smiled.

Peter now rejoined you at your side, slipping a drink into your hands- non-alcoholic of course, per May’s request. His other hand found its way to the small of your back.

“Peter, this is Dr. Stephen Strange.” You introduced him.

“Peter Parker,” He smiled, shaking the doctor’s hand. Something you couldn’t describe flashed over Peter’s eyes as they shook hands. Like a gut feeling he couldn’t quite place. For some reason his spidey senses were going off.

“Enjoy your evening, I need to check in at work.” Strange gave a curt nod and smile as he said his goodbyes. As he walked past you he dropped his voice to a whisper and spoke into your ear, “I like this one much better than the last.”

“Me too,” You whispered back with a smirk.

“So... how do you know him?” Peter asked curiously as the doctor excused himself to call the hospital.

“We run in the same circles, it’s a lot of the same people that come to these sorts of things. His hospital donates a lot of money to these causes and when he pisses off the board they send him to represent them as punishment.” You explained.

“This is a punishment?” Peter asked, dumbfounded.

“For a neurosurgeon it might just be,” You laughed, shaking your head, “I’m surprised he’s here.”

“Why?” He furrowed his brows.

“I heard he was in an accident not too far back. A bad one. I didn’t know he had gone back to work. Hmm...” You looked off to where the man had disappeared to.

“Care to dance, Parker?” You changed the subject, taking his hand into yours and placing your drinks onto the nearest table.

As the song changed to I Only Have Eyes For You by The Flamingos, he held you in his arms, swaying slowly. You were lost in him, hours could have passed, or seconds. As your bodies were pressed together you felt a sensation you could only describe as home.

“So has it been everything you dreamed it would be? These stuffy formalities for rich people to get drunk and spend money.” You chuckled as you looked up at him.

“It’s beautiful, but I guess, I mean it seems so glamorous from the outside.” He shook his head.

“Sorry to burst the bubble for you. It’s a little less Gatsby, and a little more, middle aged businessman doing coke in the bathroom.” You quipped.

Peter’s head immediately whipped towards the bathroom door where two men were emerging, one rubbing his nose.

“No way...” He looked back to you with wide eyes.

“You’d be surprised.” You chuckled.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

After a little more dancing and mingling you and Peter made your way out onto the deserted balcony.

“Are you cold?” He asked, as he leaned onto the railing next to you. You were hiding it well but he still sensed it.

“A little.” You chuckled, cursing those spidey senses for giving you away.

Peter slipped off his coat and placed it over your shoulders. You thanked him as you turned to admire the moonlit lake below you. It was so quiet and peaceful, untouched by the party going on just on the other side of the glass doors.

“Did you have a good day?” Peter asked.

“Perfect.” You looked up to him and smiled, and you meant it.

“Um, so, Happy told me that you don’t like to celebrate your birthday but,” Peter began to speak, nervously. Your eyes grew wide, how in the world did he know it was your birthday? That was the one day you liked to keep private and out of the press. Only the Avengers, Pepper and Happy knew when it was. “I wanted to give you this. Everyone deserves at least one present on their birthday.”

“Peter you didn’t-” You shook your head, before he cut you off.

“I know I didn’t have to, but I wanted to. And don’t worry, Mr. Stark swore me to secrecy so I won’t go announcing it to the world.” He reassured you as he reached into his pocket to pull out a little box.

“I know it’s not much, and I’m sure you have a million other fancy things, but I wanted you to have this.” Peter opened the box nervously, revealing a necklace. It was a single pearl and diamond dangling from a silver chain. Simple, but beautiful. “It was my mothers. Aunt May said that my dad gave it to her on their wedding day.”

Your jaw dropped slightly and your hand went over your heart.

“Peter, I-” How could you accept this? It was probably one of the last bits he had of his mother and he was just giving it away? You knew how much they meant to him, and he’d been through so much. With losing both parents so young and then his Uncle Ben not that long ago. Tears began to pool up in your eyes. Did he really care about you that much to part with something this important?

“Are you sure?” You asked softly.

“Of course I am. She would have loved you. She would have wanted you to have it.” Peter spoke, slipping the necklace on you as a single tear slipped down your cheek.

You turned back to him with a smile, he gently rubbed his thumb across your cheek to wipe the tear away. He didn’t know what to say- actually that’s a lie. He knew exactly what three words he wanted to say, but he thought it might be too soon and he might scare you. He absolutely didn’t want that. So he just smiled at you as you leaned in to kiss him.

You pulled away and wiped your tears, trying your best not to mess up your makeup.

“Thank you Peter.” You sniffled, chuckling at how silly you were being.

“Happy birthday.” He beamed as you heard the band strike up a slow song inside. He extended his hand to you, “Y/N Stark, can I have this dance?”

There was that goofy smile again, causing you to giggle as you placed your hand in his. He pulled you close, you rest your head on his shoulder as you both sway to the music. And for once in your life, everything was perfect.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

After everyone had said their goodbyes and they ushered you out of the venue, you and Peter began your short walk through the park to the Plaza Hotel across the street.

“Tonight was like a dream,” You said, as you swung your intertwined hands slightly.

“Haven’t you been to a million of these things.” Peter chuckled and shook his head.

“Yes, but I’ve never been to one with someone I love and it’s a very different experience I’ve learned.” You spoke, causing Peter to stop.

You turned to face him as you noticed his wide eyes, not believing the words that just came out of your mouth. It took him a minute to process. One, that meant you loved him. And two, that meant you were never in love with Thomas, since you’d been to these events with him before.

“Ok, you’re kinda scaring me now Peter,” You laughed nervously at his awestruck state.

“You love me?” He asked, and you answered with a nod and a smile.

He placed his hands on either side of your face and pulled you into a sweeping kiss.

“Am I dreaming?” Peter asks, pulling away, looking for any sign on your face that this was all some sort of joke.

“I sure hope not,” You chuckle.

“I love you too,” Peter beams at you, pulling you into another kiss.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

“Woah...” You and Peter both mutter as you push open the door to your hotel room. Now this was fancy. You felt like you were in a room in Buckingham Palace.

You both walked around, inspecting the room as you dropped your coats. You saw your bags in the corner that had already been brought up. You ran your hand over one of the pillows on the huge California King sized bed as your lips morphed into a smirk and an idea popped into your head. You clutched onto the pillow with one of your perfectly manicured hands as you spun around, whacking Peter with it.

“Hey!” He yelped, eyes growing wide at what you’d just done.

“Come on Parker, let’s see what you’ve got.” You tossed him another pillow from the bed with a smirk.

“O you’re gonna regret this,” He stalked towards you. You kicked off your heels and jumped onto the bed, standing up on your knees.

He swung his pillow as you ducked, it just missed you. You took the opportunity to whack him again. He looked at you with wide eyes, thinking, How had he missed?

“What? Couldn’t see that coming, bug boy?” You laughed. Taking those few seconds to gloat had proved fatal as you felt his pillow attack your side.

“Oof,” You feigned pain as you dropped backwards until your back hit the bed.

“Are you ok?” Peter asked, worried, thinking he’d really hurt you. With his super strength he was never sure.

You waited until he was kneeling next to you to jump into action, according to your plan. You jumped up, pushing him back onto the bed as you straddle him, grabbing your pillow and smacking him a few times.

“Ok, ok, you win!” Peter cried out, forfeiting.

“Yes!” You threw your pillow up in the air in victory. Peter looked up at you, still on top of him with your hair now a mess, hanging all around your face. He cherished the genuine smile on your face. All he wanted to do was kiss you, you looked so happy.

You crawled off of him and back onto the floor where you extended your hand to help him up. As he placed his hand into yours and rose to his feet, you didn’t notice his left hand reach for the pillow. Before you knew it, there was a pillow lightly thrown in your face.

“Peter!” You squealed through laughter. He knew you were about to retaliate when you reached for your own pillow on the bed. But he was faster, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you away.

“Come on, truce?” He asked as you struggled against his arms.

“Fine, truce.” You said, shaking his extended hand as he let you go.

“Hungry?” You asked, reaching for the room service menu on the desk and flipping through it.

“Starving.” He said, reading it over your shoulder.

After you had called in the food, you walked over to explore the rest of the room.

“They said it will be about an hour.” You told Peter, as you pushed open the door to the bathroom.

“So what do we do til then?” He asked, but you didn’t hear him.

“Jesus, look at the size of that tub.” You exclaimed, and Peter came over to your side to get a look at it too.

“Wow,” He said when his eyes landed on the giant clawfoot tub, “Um we definitely have to use that.”

You turned to face him with a smile.

“Really? You’d wanna do that?” You asked, who knew Peter Parker was a sucker for bubble baths.

“Absolutely. And do they have those big fluffy robes like in the movies?” He asked, excitedly, like a kid on Christmas.

You walked over to the closet and pulled the doors open, revealing two robes as described. You pulled them out and presented them to him.

“Cool...” His eyes lit up as he felt the material between his fingers.

You started to run the water, adding bath salts and bubbles, knowing it would take a while to fill the whole thing. Your things had already been brought to the room before you got there, so you got to work taking off your makeup and letting your now messy hair down.

You tried to reach for your zipper, as your body cried to be released from this skin tight dress.

“Hey Pete,” You called, and he strolled in the bathroom, now only wearing his dress pants and no shirt... and the butterflies were back. God how could he look that good, you stared shamelessly.

“You called?” He smirked, breaking your train of thought.

“Oh um, can you help me with my zipper?” You blushed, knowing you’d been caught.

“Mhm, turn around.” He instructed, before his fingers found the metal pull tab and he slowly worked it down, revealing more and more skin.

“There you go.” He smiled, placing a kiss on your shoulder, his gentle action nearly making you swoon. “I think the water’s ready if you want me to turn off the tap.”

“Yeah, yeah go ahead.” You nodded. You watched him turn off the spout and slip off his dress pants until he was just in his boxers. He folded them and set them aside before looking up to you. You were still holding your dress against your chest to keep it up, as the back gaped open and the thin straps slipped down your arms.

“Do you need help with that?” Peter asked, pointing to your dress, thinking you might need help taking it off. You thought you could manage, but on second thought you might need help. It was a tight dress and your stylist had helped you into it. You only nodded in response as Peter moved behind you. He gently helped you slip your arms through the straps and pulled the fabric down your body. He gave the fabric a quick tug as it struggled to get past your hips. You were now exposed in front of him. The dress was too tight for you to wear any sort of undergarments. He took you in for a moment before shifting his attention respectfully to the red indentations down your side from where the seams of the dress dug into you.

“Does this hurt?” He asked, gently rubbing his fingers down them.

“Not really,” You shook your head. He reached out his hand to help you into the tub without slipping.

You sank into the warm water as Peter dropped his boxers and joined you. Your eyes went wide at the size of him, and you looked away, a blush slowly crept onto your cheeks.

He must have noticed because the next thing you knew, a splash of water was hitting your face. You looked back to him in shock, he was sitting back laughing. You flicked your hand through the water, splashing him back.

You moved to do it again, but he grabbed your wrist, stopping you. You knew it was a good idea, if the two of you started going at it again like in the pillow fight, it would lead to a mess and an expensive clean up bill.

“Do they always book rooms this fancy for the galas?” Peter asked, taking in the room once more.

“I don’t know, this was the first time I’ve accepted it.” You shrugged, following his gaze up to the gold crown molding and chandelier.

“Really? I thought you did this all the time.” Peter assumed.

“No, I don’t make it a habit of jumping into tubs with strange men.” You joked.

“That’s not what I meant, and I’m not a strange man, I’m your boyfriend.” He teased as he pulled you towards him. You chuckled and placed your lips onto his quickly before pulling away.

“Say it again.” You smiled. He furrowed his brows for a moment before smiling.

“I’m... your... boyfriend.” He said slowly, placing a kiss on either cheek between words, his lips landing on yours after his last word.

He now had his arms around your waist, pulling you close as your lips collided. When you broke apart for air, he looked down at the necklace around your neck and smiled.

“This is a dream right? I’m dreaming.” Peter shook his head with a goofy grin, not being able to believe his eyes.

“Does this feel like a dream?” You asked, taking both of his hands and placing them onto your breasts. He responded by crashing his lips onto yours, he groaned against your mouth as he pulled you closer.

“It’s nice to know you dream about me Parker.” You quipped with a smirk as you broke apart for air. He chuckled at your cockiness.

“All the time, baby.” He replied, and the pet name rolled off his tongue before he even realized what he said. God you almost melted at the sound. It was your turn to crash your lips against his and let out a moan as his hand traveled down to squeeze your ass.

A knock at the door pulled you both apart as you stared at each other with wide eyes.

“Room service!” A voice called, causing you both to let out the breath you didn’t know you were holding in.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

The two of you sat at the dining table, both in your white fluffy robes with nearly dripping wet hair.

“God this is so good.” Peter said, stuffing his mouth.

“Mm, I know, I didn’t realize I was this hungry.” You said, doing the same. Who knew fancy hotels made burgers and fries this good.

You picked up a fry from your plate, waving it at Peter.

“Ready? Catch.” You said as you threw it across the table as Peter caught it in his mouth.

“Ok your turn,” Peter said, tossing one of his. You leaned to the side, nearly missing it, but catching it in your mouth. You thrust your fists in the air in celebration, causing Peter to chuckle.

The two of you ate and talked, before cleaning up.

“Ugh, I’m so full.” You groaned, falling back onto the bed, rubbing your full stomach, causing Peter to laugh.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” Peter asked.

“Oo yeah, we should probably get out of these robes though.” You said, moving from the bed, not wanting to get it all wet.

“Here,” Peter said, moving to his duffle bag and tossing you one of his t-shirts. You slipped it on as he slipped on some boxers and hung up your robes. You glanced down at the Midtown Tech logo and smiled. The fabric fell down to the middle of your thigh.

“I like seeing you in my clothes.” Peter smiled as he approached you sitting on the edge of the bed and pulled you into a chaste kiss.

“Cafeul, soon all your sweatshirts are gonna go missing.” You said, making him laugh.

Peter sat with his back against the headboard, and motioned you over to him. You crawled across the bed and laid into his side as he wrapped an arm around your waist, keeping you close. He held the remote in his other hand, scrolling through options on the large screen.

“Have you seen this?” Peter motioned towards the screen.

“That’s my favorite movie.” You chuckled, smiling up at him as he immediately pressed start.

Peter absentmindedly played with your hair as the movie went on. As the credits rolled a few hours later you leaned up to face Peter.

“Thank you for today. As birthdays go, I gotta say this may be my best yet.” You spoke genuinely.

“Well it’s not over yet.” He stated after glancing at the clock on the bedside table.

“It’s not?” You smirk, as he pulls you closer.

“I think we were interrupted earlier.” He said slowly, a blush returning to your cheeks as you remembered the events that took place, or almost took place in the bathtub a few hours earlier.

“I think you’re right.” You whispered back, as you climbed onto his lap as his lips intertwined with yours.

You’ve kissed him before, that wasn’t new, but this time something was different. There was a hunger you couldn’t quite describe. His hands began to roam your body, trying to take in every inch of you. A strong arm wrapped around your waist, lifted you, and laid you down onto the bed as Peter now hovered over you.

You gasped at the sudden movement before smiling as Peter lowered his lips to yours once more.

“Y/N,” He said, making you stop and open your eyes, worriedly. Was he ok? Was this too much?

“I’ve never...” He began, nervously.

“That’s ok Peter, we don’t have to-” You tried to reassure him, but he shook his head.

“I want to, God I want to. I want to make you feel good.” He said, his hand traveling up your shirt and resting on your waist.

“Are you sure?” You asked, not wanting to push him into something he wasn’t ready for.

He nodded, muttering a yes as he brought his lips down to you once more, before pulling away.

“Are you?” He asked, making sure this wasn’t one sided.

“Absolutely.” You smiled, taking in the sight of him above you, reaching up to gently move a curl that was falling onto his face, brushing his hair back with your fingers.

And for the first time in your life, you realized why it was called ‘making love’. As much as the phrase made you cringe. As much as you hated when people said that, that was the only way you could think to describe what you and Peter just did. It was sweet but passionate. Peter was gentle yet ruthless in all the right ways. You figured it out together, through the giggles and moans. And as first times go, it was perfect.

For one night you got to be kids. Of course you were adults, just barely. But the two of you had more weight on your shoulders than most adults would ever have. You had responsibilities, that the safety of the city and the world depended on. But for one night, you got to be normal, you got to be kids. For one night you were free, and you cherished it, because neither of you knew how long it would last.

- - - - - 🕷 - - - - -

Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated! 

TAGLIST in Reblog

[crowdedimagines]

Happy To Help - David Dobrik

“Baby, what’s wrong?” I ask, sitting up in our bed. David came in with a serious look on his face. One that I don’t see very often. Definitely not this early on a Sunday morning, it’s still early and quiet. The only reason he got out of bed was his mom calling his phone.

“My dad threw out his back really badly and he needs surgery.” He walks over to sit on the edge of the bed.

“Is he okay?” I ask tentatively.

“Yeah, he’s claiming he’s fine but my mom said he can’t even move. He’s in a lot of pain.” David wipes at his face, “Fuck.”

“How can I help?” I take his hand in mine and try to get him to focus, “Should we fly out to help out? If he needs surgery he’s going to be in the hospital for a while.”

He nods and leans into my touch. I pull him back to lay on top of me on our bed. He worries about his family all the time, this is like a nightmare for him.

“I’m gonna call Jack.” He announces.

He grabs his phone and calls his manager to inform him of what happened. I tune out most of what he says as I grab a bag for each of us. I start packing my own things so we can leave as soon as he needs to.

“Are you serious?” David’s voice suddenly pulls me from my thoughts. He’s sitting on the Lovesac with his phone on speaker.

“I can try to get you out of that shoot David, but they're just going to cut you out and move on with someone else. The only real issue with it is that filming for Dodgeball Thunderdome starts this week. We’ve signed a lot of contracts, I can try to get you out of them but I know how excited you were about hosting this show.”

“Fuck.” He mutters softly. “I need to be in Vernon hills by tonight. My parents are going to in to Chicago for surgery so someone needs to stay at the house. Plus once they get back they’ll need help.”

“I totally get that David.” Jack agrees, “I just want you to know the gravity of you leaving this week. The position you’re putting in those you work with. I just worry about your reputation a little and if they’ll be willing to postpone for you.”

“I’ll go.” I cut in. There’s no need for David to give up something he’s worked so hard for and he loves so much. He’s one of the hardest working people I know and he deserves everything that he’s earned.

“What?” David’s head snaps in my direction.

“You stay here, get everything done that you need to. I’ll fly out and help with the girls and Toby. Then I’ll be there when your parents get home to help. You can fly out once you’re done with everything or you get a break.” I shrug.

“Jack, let me call you back.” He hangs up the phone and gets up from his seat. He walks over to grab my hand and fully pull my attention from the clothes I had been folding, “Are you serious right now? You would do that for me?”

“Of course I would.” I smile, his arms wrap around my waist so mine settle over his shoulder, connecting at the back of his neck, “I would do anything for you, and your family. This is not a big deal, and it would make me happy to help. Plus then you don’t have to give up hosting your show. You’ve been excited about this for months.”

“I love you so much.” He sighs, pulling me in tight against his chest.

“You’re alright.” I tease, earning a laugh from him.

David insists on paying for my flight and driving me to the airport.

“Okay, my parents are waiting to leave once you get there. I already set up a rental car for you, so then you’ll have one the whole time you’re there.”

“Thank you, babe.” I press a kiss to his lips.

We get out of the car and David pulls my suitcase from the trunk.

“I cannot thank you enough for this.” He wraps his arms around my waist.

“I don’t need a thank you.” I shake my head, “One more kiss will do, though.”

David happily obliges, leaning in and pressing a kiss that lasted longer than all the others.

“Call me when you land.”

“Of course.”

I start to walk away, knowing that we could be saying our goodbyes for the next half hour if I don’t.

“I love you.” “I love you too.”

The flight is fairly uneventful and quiet, I try to sleep on the way to just be fully rested. Once I land I go find the car rental place and David (Natalie) had set everything up in advance so there wasn’t much waiting there either. I text Ester to let her know that I am on my way, she is definitely the Dobrik I talk to the most, other than David obviously. I make the drive to the Vernon Hills home, I call David on the way to talk for a while and let him know that I landed safely.

I park on the road so I don’t block in their car in the driveway and take my suitcase from the trunk. Toby greets me before I can even make it to the door, pulling me in for a hug. He holds open the door for me and I am greeted by the whole Dobrik family.

Palo is laying on the couch, in obvious discomfort. I send him a smile and say hello. I notice that they’re already packed up with everything they’ll need for the week.

“Thank you for being so kind.” Cristina sighs pulling me in for another hug.

“I am happy to help in any way I can.” I smile, “Please let me know if you need anything else, honestly, anything you guys need.��

We talk for a little while before they leave so they can check in. It’s over an hour drive to the hospital they’re doing it at so they leave now.

“Alright, now it’s just us.” I laugh, we’ve all already eaten dinner so we all sit down in the living room to watch a movie. We don’t stay up late, all three of them have school tomorrow. Ester stays up a little later, she talks to me about school, boys, and drama.

After we both say goodnight I make my way up to David’s room. It’s always been the room I stay in with David, but I’ve never been here without him.

“I’m laying in your childhood bed right now.”

“Why do you make that sound so sexy.” He laughs, “It’s kind of turning me on.”

“Gross.” I laugh loudly.

“How’s everything going?” He asks.

“So far it’s fine. Your dad looked like he really needed to get out of the house tonight and get checked in so I’m glad I flew in tonight instead of tomorrow morning.”

“Me too.” He sighs, “I can never thank you enough for this.”

“You don’t need to thank me, isn’t that what girlfriends are for?” I laugh.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had a girlfriend do something like this for me before.”

“I guess I’m pretty special then.” I grin, turning on my side. It’s not very often that I sleep by myself now that David and I live together, but it’s comforting to hear his voice.

“That you are.”

I don’t remember saying goodnight to David, but at some point I must’ve fallen asleep. I wake up when my alarm goes off, notifying me that I need to get ready so I can get everyone else ready and drive them all to school.

“Good morning.” I smile seeing Sara and Ester come down the stairs.

They sit down for a bowl of cereal, eventually Toby comes down, his hair angled in fifty different directions, reminding me of his older brother.

“Alright, everyone’s ready for school?”

Everyone piles in the car and we leave. I drop off Toby first, seeing as his school day starts earlier than the girls. I drop off Sara next, leaving only Ester and I in the car.

“What’s so funny?” Ester grins, glancing at me from the passenger seat.

“I never thought that I would be a soccer mom at twenty-two. It’s a little odd dropping kids off at school.”

“Whatever.” She bumps my shoulder lightly, “You’re not a mom. Yet.”

“Yet?” I raise my brows, looking over at her amused. David and I have never talked about kids, even though it's known that we both want them, just not any time soon.

“You and David will be married any day now. And the way David talks about you guys on the podcast, it doesn’t seem like you guys are staying celebete.”

My face takes on a red tint. I’ve never been a shy girl, but I was not expecting this to be our car ride conversation. Ester is old enough to not be phased by talking about sex, we’ve been having boy talk for practially as long as David and I have been dating. I’ve talked about worse, but I’ve never gone into details when it pertained to her brother.

“Oh my god, shut up!” I laugh.

“What we always talk about boys!” She grins.

“Well, it’s definitely different when my boy is your brother.”

“Yeah, that’s not the greatest, but I like talking to you. You give off older sister vibes.”

“Thanks. Now get out of the car.” I smirk, teasing her. We’re pulled up in front of her school, the same school David went to high school.

“Thanks for the ride.”

“Anytime!” I manage to pull out before many fans take notice. Thankfully, I’m not David, but still we could easily form a crowd if I stayed for too long.

It takes a few more days to fall into a good rhythm with everything. Between the kids homework, making meals, cleaning, and just trying to keep everything organized for when David’s parents come back it's been an exhausting yet rewarding week. Palo’s surgery was today, it went well. He only needs a few days in recovery before he can come home.

“Y/n, David’s asking for you.” Ester comes down the stairs, phone in hand.

“Babe, you didn’t answer your phone!” He yells through the phone.

Ester holds out her phone so I can see him on facetime.

“Sorry, Sara and I are painting our nails!” I hold up a hand as proof and he nods.

“So, how’s everything going?”

“It’s good babe, it’s actually been a pretty fun week.” I smile, “I’m starting to like your siblings more than I like you.”

“And we definitely like Y/n more than you!” Toby teases leaning into frame.

“Fuck you guys.” He laughs.

“So how’s filming been? I saw your story! Very fancy them giving you someone to follow you around with an umbrella.”

“It’s been fun. I forgot just how good it feels to be working! Do you have any idea when you’re coming back?”

I shake my head, “No, your parents are coming home in three days and I’ll talk to them and go from there. Are you still planning on staying in L.A?”

“Yeah, my mom insisted I stay here. She already feels guilty enough making you fly out, but we’ll see.”

“Okay, keep me posted. Love you.”

“Love you more.”

Ester takes her phone back and continues talking with David.

“I like the color you picked better.” Sara comments, noticing the light color I’ve picked for my nails.

“Wanna trade?”

“What? We already painted one of our hands.” She looks up at me confused.

“So what! It’ll be different. Then we kind of match.”

Sara and I finish up our nails. We all call Palo and Cristina, our nightly ritual to say good night to everyone. Everyone goes to bed, I stay up a little later so I can clean up the dishes from dinner and the nail polish that we left on the counter.

The rest of the week passes by without any hiccups. There’s a few times I can tell Toby really misses his parents, but other than that everything’s been a breeze. More than that actually, I feel closer to all of them. I was nervous to come, even though I would never tell David that. I was afraid to step in and try to help when I have no clue what I’m doing, but it went better than I could imagine.

“Are you absolutely sure?” I ask, “I don’t mind staying longer at all!”

“No!” Cristina insists, “We are fine, Palo is feeling fine now that he’s been back at home for a few days. We will be okay.”

She places a reassuring hand on my arm and I simply smile.

“Only if you’re one hundred percent sure.”

“I already told David to book you another flight.”

I thank her and go upstairs so I can pack up all of my belongings. I ended up spending ten days in Chicago, but it was alright. I had fun, and it felt good to be needed.

“Okay, I think I’m all packed up.” I bring my suitcase to the bottom of the stairs and smile at the family in the living room. I get hugs from everyone, and several thank yous. Too many if you ask me.

“I’m going to walk Y/n out to her car.” Ester grabs one of my other bags to walk with me.

“Me too!” Sara tags along.

You could never get me to wipe off the grin watching those two girls bound away with my stuff.

“The ride to school is going to seem boring now.” Ester sighs.

“I’m sure you’ll manage.” I grin.

“Yeah, but mom doesn’t talk about weed or hooking up at parties.”

“Shh!” I clamp a hand over her mouth, “And if anyone asks I don’t talk about that stuff either!”

I give them each another hug and start to get back in the car.

“Y/n, will you call me tonight? Like once you’re back home and settled.”

“Yeah, is everything okay?” I raise my brows.

“No, I just have something I want to talk to you about. You’ll get it, it’s fine!”

“Okay, weirdo!” I laugh shutting my door. I back down the driveway and notice that all of the Dobriks are out on the front porch now waving. I wave back with a smile and drive back to Chicago to finally head home.

“Baby, I’m home!” I yell, letting myself in our front door. The goal was to surprise him, he didn’t know that my flight landed early, causing me to get the jump on him.

“Y/n?” He yells back loudly. I drop my bags and round the corner to see him coming to find me.

“Baby!” He instantly pulls me into his arms, “God, I missed you.”

“I missed you too.” I sigh, pulling him in a little tighter.

After a good long cuddle in our bed it’s nice to just settle in again. It’s nice to see Natalie and Ilya too. I wasn’t that long, but I was weird to be apart from the whole group for that long. We purge on a large dinner ordered in, after stuffing our faces, David and I settle on the hammock outside together. The sun is setting slowly, letting the sky take on a pink hue.

“I can never thank you enough for what you did.”

“David, you have to stop thanking me.” I sigh, letting him twist and play with my fingers.

“Y/n.” He says my name softly.

“Hmm?” I turn to look at him, he has a surprisingly serious look on his face.

“We just moved in together. I’ve never done that with a girl, I thought that I would be afraid to do it, but with you I am not afraid of the future anymore. The only thing that scares me is a future without you, as cheesy as that sounds. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, more than anything.”

He reaches into his back pocket and I can feel a smile growing on my face. He opens up the black velvet box to reveal a beautiful ring with a large diamond sitting front and center.

“I bought this ring after you left for Chicago. I knew that I wanted to marry you before that, but right then and there I decided that I needed to lock you down.” He pauses to laugh a little, I join in too, “I needed to make if official. Make it real, because I don’t want to waste anymore time as your boyfriend. You treat my family like your own, and I want to make you mine. Forever. Y/n, will you marry me?”

“Of course!” I sigh, no longer fighting the teary eyes. I pull David in for a long sweet kiss. We pull apart laughing, he slides the ring on my finger and I smile even wider.

“Baby, it’s perfect.”

“Ester helped me pick it.” He grins, pressing several more kisses to my temple.

“She did? Of course she did. Well you both did a great job.”

“I’ll be right back, I got us champagne!” He climbs out of the hammock carefully. I smile softly watching him walk away. I pull out my phone to call the girl herself.

“Hello?” She answers almost instantly.

“You picked out a stunning ring.”

“You said yes?” She shrieks.

“Well, duh!” I laugh.

“Yay, oh my god. I love this! She said yes!” She yells loudly to I’m sure the whole family.

“Did everyone know?” I ask, sitting up a little more.

“Yeah, he’s been too excited to keep it to himself. Told everyone in L.A and of course he told us. I think everyone knew but you.”

“Sneaky boy.” I roll my eyes. David makes his way back outside, two glasses in one hand the bottle in the other. The same smile stuck on his face.

“Hey, who are you talking to already?” He rejoins me.

“Your sister. I promised her I would call.”

I put the phone on speaker so David can hear too. We talk with Ester and everyone else in the family for a while. It feels comfortable. We spend the rest of the night snuggled up together, even as it gets colder.

Natalie took a video, which I was completely oblivious to. We also got some really cute pictures, which David proudly sends to the group chat, informing everyone who he had gushed to that I had in fact said yes. It was a steady stream of congratulations.

“Ready to go inside?”

“Mhm” I sigh dreamily looking down at the new piece of jewelry on my hand.

“C’mon, it’ll still be there in the morning.”

an// this was some CUTE fluff!! Also what is David’s mom’s name? I wrote this and then I couldn’t remember if it was right so i went to look it up and i can’t even find it. so if anyone knows, cool! lol

what did you guys think?!?!

[turning-dreams-into-chaos]

You Over Her

Request: Hello. I was hoping I could request a Peter Parker imagine where Peter goes to Y/N to ask for her help to tell M.J how he feels in FFH. Y/N has a crush on Peter but helps him but instead Peter falls for Y/N? Angsty to happy fluffy ending?

Requested by: @mintynapalm-blog

Paring: Peter Parker x reader

Word Count: 5.6K (this was longer and still shorter than I imagined?)

~Master~

~Marvel Master~

Peter had no idea how to tell a girl he liked her. He knew it, Ned knew it, you knew it, hell even May knew it. He somehow always managed to embarrass himself and never get the job done. Like right now as you sat in class next to Peter and Ned as they went over Peter’s plan to ask out MJ.

You were flipping through your book, barely reading it as you listened to Peter. “Okay, first I sit next to MJ on the flight.” He began as Ned and you nodded, humming a yes. “Second, I’m gonna buy a dual headphone adapter and watch movies with her the whole time.”

“Okay.” Ned said, prompting him to continue.

“Three, when we go to Venice, Venice is super famous for making stuff out of glass, right? So, I’m gonna buy her a Black Dahlia necklace, because her favorite flower is the Black Dahlia, because of, well...”

“The murder.” Ned filled in, you looked up just in time to see Peter with a lovesick smile. Your eyes shot back to your book as fast as they’d risen.

“Right. And four, when we go to Paris, I’m gonna take her to the top of the Eiffel Tower, give her the necklace. Five, I’m gonna tell her how I feel. And then six, hopefully she’ll tell me she feels the same way.” He finished with a satisfied smile on his face as he looked between you and Ned. Your focus was still on the book and Peter felt a little less successful.

“Oh!” Ned shouted, getting Peter’s attention. “Don’t forget step seven.”

Peter furrowed his brows as looked at you and Ned wondering if he was forgetting something. “Step seven?” he asked. Ned glanced at you briefly with a smirk as you quirked a brow.

“Don’t do any of that.” You let out a snort at Ned’s words, bringing a hand up to cover your mouth and prevent another from coming through. Peter’s whole face dropped at Ned’s words and you couldn’t help but feel bad for him. He must really like MJ.

So, you might’ve been crushing on Peter. Crushing putting in lightly.

“Y/NNN!!” Peter called at you, snapping you out of your slight daydream. You played if off and luckily neither Peter or Ned caught on. “I need your help.”

“My help? What the hell with?” you were already unnerved by the smile Peter was giving you and you weren’t looking forward to finding out what he wanted.

“Well you’re a girl.”

You blinked at him, your lips falling into a thin line. “Astute observation Pete.” You closed your book, moving to stand up and shove it into your backpack before Peter grabbed your arm.

“No! I just mean- I meant, you’re a girl. You’re good at these things, right?” He sounded desperate and with a sigh you sat down, slouching in your seat a little.

“Good at what? Asking someone out? Peter you know I’ve never asked someone out right?” You didn’t really want to have this conversation, but you knew Peter was going to keep asking.

“Well, you know how girls want to be asked out. You could help me, you know, ask out MJ.” Peter smiled at you and you groaned, closing your eyes.

Well shit, he had a point there.

“Please Y/N, you know I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t desperate. Please?” He gave you his puppy dog eyes, the ones you knew you could never say no to as you groaned, throwing your head back.

“Fine! Fine, I’ll help you.”

“No Y/N you can’t.” Ned said. Mentally you were relieved, but you didn’t understand and neither did Peter. “We were going to be bachelors in Europe Peter!” You had to laugh at his statement, both boys looking at you before Ned carried on. “Look, I may not know much, but I do know this: Europeans love Americans and more than half of them are woman.”

“Yeah I’m pretty sure that’s not true.” You told him, patting his back.

“Less than half are woman?” Ned clarified as you rolled your eyes, giving up.

“Sure Neddie. Sure.”

Peter groaned, getting your attentions again. “I really like MJ, Okay? She’s awesome, she’s funny in a sort of dark way, and sometimes I catch her looking at me.” He glanced over your shoulder, seeing MJ coming your way as his eyes widened. “Guys, she’s coming. Just don’t say anything.” You rolled your eyes, turning in your seat momentarily to send your friend a smile.

“What up, dorks? Excited about the science trip?” She asked, leaning into the table to stand next to you.

“Yeah, and Peter’s plan.” Ned said as Peter and you both looked at him with wide eyes. He wouldn’t tell MJ, right?

“What plan?”

“I-I don’t have a plan.” Peter blurted out.

Ned tried to make things better, only to make things worse. “No, he’s just going to collect tiny spoons while we’re traveling to other countries.”

MJ scrunched her face up, looking at Peter like he was crazy. “Like a grandmother?”

“It’s for his Aunt May.” You interrupted them, sending Ned and Peter a look to play along. “All the ones she collected were lost after the blip. Peter was going to buy some new ones for her.” MJ looked almost taken back by your response, the boys surprise almost matching until you kicked them both under the table.

“Uh, Yeah. T-they’re for May.”

“Wow, Peter. That’s really cool.” Peter smiled nervously to her, making your stomach drop slightly. “By the way, travel tip: You should probably download a VPN on your phone, just so that the government can’t track you while we’re abroad.” MJ said returning to the girl you knew. Peter chuckled, telling her the idea was smart before watching her walk away.

He turned to Ned, glaring at him before looking at you. “Don’t mention it Peter.” You gave him a smile before grabbing your book and headed towards the door.

“Well, I think that went great.” Ned shrugged as Peter nodded, sending him another glare before watching you disappear.

You flipped through the channels on the news while sitting on your couch, seeing reporter after reporter talking about the blip. You were about to turn it off before you saw Peter dressed as Spider-Man at what seemed to be a support rally. You sat up and listened to the reporters attack him, asking him if he was going to be the next avenger or how he was supposed to fill Tony’s shoes. You hated listening, about to turn it off before seeing Peter start to get anxious, leaving the interview as fast as he could.

You sighed, reaching for your phone and shooting Peter a quick text asking if he was alright. You didn’t expect Peter to answer after moments like these, he needed space and you knew that. But you couldn’t help but wonder if MJ texted instead of you, would he have answered?

Peter ended up texting you that night before he went to bed, apologizing for not answering earlier. You were already in bed when you got his text, and the one following asking if he could FaceTime with you.

You groaned checking yourself out in your camera. Your hair was a mess and you looked like you haven’t slept in days, but you ignored it knowing Peter’s seen you looking this bad before.

You pressed the call button and the moment his face popped up on your screen, you had to laugh. He was holding the phone way to close to his face and the lights of the room were off, the only brightness coming from his screen.

“Pete, pull the phone away!” You giggled as he let out a groan, pulling the device from his face slightly. You felt yourself gasp when you realized he was shirtless, and you hoped he hadn’t heard it.

“Why are you up so late?” He grumbled out, turning to lay on his back and bunching his pillow into his chin.

You looked over to the clock in your bedside table, reading the bright letters telling you it was half passed one in the morning. You shrugged at the screen. “I don’t know. Couldn’t sleep. ‘Sides, we leave for Europe tomorrow.” Peter groaned, running a hand over his face making you chuckle again. “Were you on patrol?”

He nodded, shooting you a lazy smile. “Yeah, figured I get one more night in before we leave.” In the dark, Peter looked at his empty suitcase. “I’d ask if you’re packed yet, but knowing you, you’ve been packed since we got back.”

“Hey, I am an organized person, okay. But Peter, please tell me you haven’t put off packing.” He gave you a grin, one that told you he did in fact put off packing. You scoffed, smirking at him. “So, any progress on dating MJ?” You didn’t know why you brought it up, it hurt you to think about, but you knew it was important to him.

“What? O-oh, Uh Nope. Not since class.” You started to nod because letting out a yawn, him making chuckle. “Y/N?”

“Yeah?” You asked before another yawn took you over, your eyes droopy.

“Go to sleep.”

“I’m fine Peter.” You lied. Peter didn’t say anything, just watching you yawn a third time. “I swear I wasn’t yawning a minute ago.”

“Aw, Y/N am I putting you to sleep?”

“Shut up jerk. Maybe I wouldn’t have been so tired if you would’ve gotten off patrol earlier.” You laughed but Peter didn’t laugh with you, instead his brows furrowing.

“You were awake because you were waiting for me? I thought you said you couldn’t sleep.” You realized what you had just said, telling Peter the real reason you stay up until 1:30.

You didn’t have time to respond before your dad opened the door. “Come on Y/N. You promised last night you’d go to bed earlier.” He flickered your lights before Peter’s chuckle made its way through the phones speaker and your dad stopped. “Good to bed, Peter.” He called out, watching you turn the phone to him.

“Sorry Mr. Y/L/N!” Peter said over the phone, both of you trying to keep yourselves from laughing as your dad sent you a knowing smirk. Behind the camera your eyes widened, glaring at him and silently pleading that he would stop and shut the door. He finally relented, turning your light off on the way.

You face palmed as you spun the phone around again, seeing Peter’s teasing smile. “Ooh, you got in trouble.”

“Yeah, Yeah, I know.” You sighed, looking at Peter through the phone. “Night Petey.”

“Good night Y/N.” Peter watched as you pressed the end call button, your face lingered on his screen for an extra second before it disappeared and he turned off his phone, bathing him in darkness as he worried about this trip.

The airplane was exactly how you expected it to be. The kids from your class were creating chaos as people tried to board, making you laugh and shake your head. You took your seat next to Brad and looked around for your friends. Betty and MJ were sitting in the row behind you and Peter and Ned were sitting on the window a couple rows ahead. You could see Peter kept glancing at MJ before you remembered his plan.

Step 1: Sit next to MJ on the flight

You thought about how to do this, tapping Betty on the shoulder. “Hey Betts, would you mind switching seats with Peter? He’s a little allergic to the perfume of the lady in front of him.” Betty furrowed her brows but stood up none the less, climbing over MJ and heading to the row Peter and MJ sat.

“Hey guys.” She said as Peter and Ned just stared at her, making her more confused. “Peter, Y/N said you needed to switch seats? Something about allergies.” One look at the face you were giving Peter told him that this was all part of your plan as he quickly got to his feet.

“Oh yeah! Uh, thanks Betty.” Ned let him out of the row as Betty took Peter’s seat, giving Ned a shy smile. When Peter passed you, you gave him a thumbs up before settling into your own seat. You hadn’t realized Brad was watching you with a raised brow and a smirk of his own.

“What?” you asked him as he shrugged, the smirk never leaving his lips.

“Nothing. Just thought it was weird you couldn’t switch with Parker. Especially since in doing so, you could sit next to your friends. But instead you’re here, sitting next to me.” You bit the inside of your cheek, grinning a bit yourself because Brad had a point.

“Maybe I wanted to sit next to you.” He let out a chuckle, knowing you were just messing with him to drop the conversation. You reached into your bag, pulling out your earbuds and putting them on your table. Brad watched you, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a dual headphone connector he had bought for this exact reason.

“Wanna share?” He offered, getting your attention. You looked between him and the connector before snickering under your breath.

“Sure Davis, why not.” Peter watched between the cracks of the chair as you plug your earbuds into Brads, putting them into your ears. He couldn’t help but shift uncomfortably in his seat at the sight before MJ nudged him.

“Dude, you okay?” She asked as he nodded, pulling his attention away from you onto her.

Step 2: Watch movies with her the whole time

Peter offered MJ the dual headphone connector. She shrugged as she plugged her headphones in, and Peter put on a movie that was something MJ liked. But he couldn’t help but look through the cracks of the seats to see you snort at the movie you and Brad were watching before covering your mouth, hoping no one heard or saw. But Peter did because right now, his attention was solely focused on you. And the way you rested your head on Brad’s shoulder to see the movie better.

And the way his stomach felt to be on fire, lighting his heart along with it.

The first stop on your trip to Europe was Venice and you couldn’t be happier. Brad decided to stick by you since the flight, you didn’t really mind honestly, Peter was trying to get with MJ and Ned had forgone his entire Bachelor’s in Europe plan when he and Betty started to date during the 9-hour-flight. You were all headed to the Saint Marco Polo’s Square basking in the sunlight as it hit your face.

“Y/N!” Peter called after you as you set off with Brad who was going to take your pictures for you. You turned around to see Peter jogging up to you as you pulled your sunglasses off, giving him a soft smile.

“Hey Pete. What’s up?” you could’ve sworn Peter sent Brad a glare, but you shook the feeling off, believing it to just be in your head.

Brad on the other hand, caught Peter’s glare and threw his arm over your shoulder. You raised a teasing brow at him, but he wasn’t looking at you but at Peter. “I uh, I was hoping you’d come with me to buy the um,” He seemed to pause in his words when he saw Brads fingers placed delicately on your exposed shoulders thanks to your top that cut off just above your navel and came up to tie around your neck. You tilted your head at him. “To buy the thing.” It took you only a second to remember step 3 of the plan.

Step 3: Buy her a Black Dahlia necklace

You made an ‘o’ shape with your mouth before turning to Brad, giving him a sweet smile and putting your hand on his arm. “Sorry, I kind of promised him. Rain check?” Brad didn’t want to, but he nodded, feeling you pat his arm before walking away with Peter.

Peter didn’t say anything as you kept stealing glances at him. You were getting kind of tired of the silence as you bumped your arm with his. “So, where’s this glass necklace shop?” You asked looking around.

Peter looks around, seeing the sign just ahead as he points. “It’s just up there.”

“Then what are we waiting for?” Peter was about to question you before you grabbed his hand, taking off running through the square. Peter laughed hard as he was forced to chase after you, seeing you glance back at him every so often with a wide smile that just made him more confused with his feelings.

The store came quicker than he hoped as you stopped running, dropping Peter’s hand from yours and panted slightly. You looked at the quaint store, marveling in its beauty before Peter held the door open you. Inside was even more lovely than the outside, every wall and case filled with glass designs as you began to look around.

“Buongiorno.” Peter told the older man behind the counter who repeated the saying, giving you both a warm smile. “Hi, I’m looking for a-“

The man stopped Peter before he could say anything else.

“No English.” He said as Peter’s face dropped. You grabbed Peter’s hand stepping up to the counter.

“il mio sta cercando una collana.” You spoke up as Peter looked at you with wide eyes. The man’s warm smile was back, directly pointed to you as you described the necklace to him. He made the necklace before holding it up for you and Peter.

“Fiore Nero.” Peter took the necklace into his hands.

“è perfetto.” You thanked the man for making it and Peter paid him before you both headed outside, Peter once again looking at you amazed.

“I didn’t know you knew Italian.”

You shrugged, pulling your sunglasses over your eyes when the sun hit them. “My mom loved Italy, she always promised to take my dad and here when I grew up. She started teaching me when I was young.” Peter’s smile fell a little when you mentioned your mom. He remembered the day 13-year-old you called him, crying over the phone and he had to beg May to drive him to your place just so he could comfort you. He knew how hard it was to lose your parents.

“Y/N-“

“What was step 4 again?” you interrupted him, not wanting to get into his conversation right now in the middle of Venice. Peter cleared his throat, looking straight ahead to where MJ was standing surrounded by birds.

“Give her the necklace on top of the Eiffel Tower.” He reminded you and you nodded, giving him a smile.

“Good, so now you have time to ensure she feels the same about you.”

“What are you talking about?” You rolled your eyes, looking around the square as you talked.

“Well, step 6 is hoping MJ feels the same and in order to for her to feel that way, you have to convince her.” You stopped Peter in his tracks, getting him to look at MJ playing with the birds. “Peter I’ve never had a boyfriend, okay? It’s pretty obvious that I don’t know how to get a guy to like me,” Peter wanted to object when you were too busy watching MJ to him as you kept talking, “but I know what a guy could do to get me to like him.”

It was pretty easy to figure out. It was everything Peter did.

Peter nodded his head, taking deep breaths as you laughed quietly, putting your hands on his shoulders to get him to look at you. “Peter, trust me, you’ll have no problems getting her to like you.” Peter’s lips curled up in a smile at your words, for a second you enjoyed the moment, but that moment was over as soon as you remembered you were trying to set him up with your friend. You cleared your throat, pulling your eyes back to MJ and taking your hands off his shoulder. “Just be honest with her. No one likes secrets, especially from a guy trying to ask her out.”

“Honest. Okay, I-I can do that.” He said as he bounced on his feet, getting his whole body in motion to hype himself up. You chuckled to yourself as you watched him, giving his shoulder a slight push in her direction. Peter stumbled as he started looking, turning back to you with wide eyes. You gave him a smile, one that Peter found to calm his nerves immensely as he inhaled, carrying on with the plan. You watched Peter walk away, literally right into MJ’s hands from yours. Your heart was drowning in your chest as you watched Peter and her talk, seeing the smiles he gave her and knowing they were nothing like the smiles he was giving you. You had to turn away at the sound of MJ’s laughter.

“Are you sure you should be helping him?” You jumped in your spot at the sound of Ned’s voice behind you. Your hand flew to your chest as you spun around to scowl at him, seeing Betty and him side by side. The smirk Ned wore made you glance over your shoulder briefly to Peter before shaking your head.

“And why shouldn’t I? I mean, he is my best friend.”

This time it was Betty’s turn to smirk at you. “Because you’re in love him.”

“Betty!” Your jaw dropped as she shrugged her shoulders, resting her head onto Ned. “I’m not in love with Peter.”

“Come on Y/N. Just be honest with him.” Ned mocked giving you a smile and you knew he overheard your conversation with Peter.

“It’s not that easy, Ned.” You sighed, feeling Ned’s arm around your shoulder as you walked away. “He likes MJ. I’m helping him ask out MJ. Not me.”

“So, you’re not gonna deny it?” Ned asked as he felt you chuckle in his arm.

“Would you believe me if I denied it again?” Betty and Ned shook their heads as you all snickered, moving on to visit Venice. You hadn’t realized that the moment you started walking away, Peter’s eyes were drawn to you, seeing you sulk with Ned and Betty. His brows were drawn together as he forgot about the girl who was playing with pigeons in front of him, focusing instead on you who was currently throwing your head back in laughter at something Ned or Betty had said.

Ned and Betty wanted to ride a gondola together and not wanting to be a third wheel or ruin their vacation, you opted out, telling them you just wanted to check out some of the shops. Your first trip to Venice wasn’t at all what you expected it to be, but you weren’t really complaining. It was a beautiful day out and the people were kind, always offering you smiles whenever they saw you. It wasn’t long after before you figured it was time to start finding your classmates. You were in a little boutique much like the one you were in with Peter before you started hearing screaming outside, you and the shop owner exchanging worried glances as you left the store. The moment you did, you regretted it, your jaw dropping at the sight of a huge water monster taking form in the canal. People ran by you shrieking, the woman you were with doing the same and grabbing your arm. The action snapped you out of your shock as your feet started running, trying to keep you from falling on your face.

The woman’s grip on you dropped when a piler landed between you, both of you jumping to the side to avoid being crushed. You had landed on the ground, your legs giving out under you before you felt someone pull you up. “Y/N!” He shouted, his hands cupping your face to make you realize it was Peter.

Your eyes couldn’t seem to focus before he started to pull you along, bringing you to an area that was semi clear. “Peter?��� you cried out, getting him to look at you. He was soaked in his clothes, his hair draping in his face. “What is happening?” You looked at the water monster, buildings being broken as your heart raced. “What is that?!”

Peter didn’t know how to answer that, his wet hair flopping as he looked between you and the monster. “I don’t know. Just stay here.” He grabbed your hands, looking in your eyes. “Please tell me you’re staying here.” You mouth opened, trying to say something but nothing worked so you nodded, feeling Peter squeeze your hands before running away.

You didn’t know how long you stood there watching Peter battle the water monster attacking Venice. You were safe where Peter had left you. Keyword, were. A rush of water hit the building next to you, the wood cracking before it fell. You let out a scream, backing against the opposite wall. The wall connecting the two buildings together started to fall as well and you knew you had to get out of there.

You stepped out the store, dashing away as the building crumbled, sending you to the ground again. You groaned as you pushed yourself up, barely getting one foot flat on the ground before you let out a scream. Water fell atop you, knocking you over and slamming your head against the ground below you. A sharp pain went through the back of your head as the water cleared up. You coughed the water out of your lungs, clutching the back of your head and thanking the fact no blood had shown up but it didn’t last long before your eyes rolled to the back of your head and you passed out.

When the water monster was taken care of, thanks to some magical hero Peter had never met before, he immediately went back to where he left you. But when he saw the building you were last in collapsed on the ground; Peter felt his entire body give out. He took off running, ignoring the cries of his legs and his eyes as he jumped onto the rubble, pulling debris away left and right in hopes of finding you.

You couldn’t be gone. You had to be alright.

Peter’s cries turned into guttural screams as he neared the bottom, only seeing ground instead of you. He shouldn’t have left you there. He should’ve brought you to Ned or MJ. He was with MJ, just before the monster attacked but he left her with Brad, running off to find you as none of his classmates new about your whereabouts. Peter sucked in a breath, trying to keep from crying more as he grasped the fact if he hadn’t found you, maybe you were okay. Maybe you were with your friends. He felt around his pocket for his phone, pulling it out to find it waterlogged. He groaned, rubbing the palm of his hands to his eyes before he shoved the device into his pocket, stood onto his wobbly feet and started back to the crappy hotel you were hopefully in.

When he arrived, Mr. Harrington sighed in relief thanking the fact that Peter was alright. Ned was out of his seat, rushing to Peter’s side as Peter’s eyes scanned around the room for you, only to come up empty. The dread in his stomach only increased as he grabbed his friend’s shoulders, looking him in the eyes. “Ned. Where’s Y/N?”

Ned copied Peter’s stance, giving him a smile. “Calm down! Calm down. She’s fine. She’s in her room with MJ. She found her passed out on the ground and Brad helped carry her back here.” Ned was barely done with his sentence before Peter was running up the stairs three steps at a time, his classmates watching his frantic actions before turning back to the tv where Mysterio was being shown. Peter headed straight to your room, the door busting open to reveal you and MJ both jumping as you sat on the bed, MJ right next to you as you were wrapped in a blanket, holding an ice pack to your head.

Peter let out a shaky sigh, as soon as soon as he saw you, his lips turning into a smile when yours did. “Thank god.” He mumbled before making his way to the bed. You immediately jumped up, the ice pack and blanket falling off you as ran to Peter. His hands immediately went around your waist as you threw yours around his neck, letting him lift you into the air for a hug. His head nuzzled into the crook of your neck as he shook in your embrace.

MJ watched with a smirk before standing up from her chair, walking past you both and to the door. You pulled yourself from Peter to look at her. “I’ll leave you to it.” She winked at you as you gulped, looking to the floor before up to Peter. His eyes were locked on your face and watery, tears wanting to race down his puffy cheeks. He hadn’t even looked back at MJ, his sole focus on you as he brought a hand up to caress your cheek.

“Peter.” You whispered, feeling your voice crack.

“I thought I lost you.” He muttered, bringing his other hand up to your other cheek. You grabbed his wrists softly, gently rubbing your thumbs on his skin. “I thought I killed y-“

“No.” you stopped him, your hold on his wrists tightening briefly. “Don’t say that Peter. It wouldn’t have been your fault.”

“I’m so sorry.” He sobbed out, bringing you into his arms again. You held him close to you, letting yourself cry into his shoulder as he did yours. Peter knew you were right, but he was the one to tell you to stay there. And if you died without him telling you the truth…

Peter pulled away as fast as he could, startling you as your hands fell off him, both of you standing a few feet away. Peter didn’t say anything, making you nervous as he looked at you, just looking at you. You didn’t know if it was the concussion you were sure to have or the way Peter’s eyes glinted as he looked at you right now, his lips turning into the smile you grew fond of.

Peter knew the smile he’d given you was different than the one he gives everyone else, and much different than the ones he’d given MJ. The smiles he gave you were nowhere near the ones he gave her. The ones he gave you held emotions; it was Peter looking at you with a love he didn’t even know he had yet.

Step 5: Tell her how you feel

Just be honest with her

“Y/N I love you.” You froze under his gaze, your heart pounding through your ears, making you believe you heard him wrong.

“W-what?” You stuttered out. Peter’s confidence dropped, his smile dropping and making you realize you hadn’t heard him wrong. “Wait, you don’t mean that as ‘I love you, you’re my best friend’ right? I- I mean, what about MJ?”

Peter let out a light, airy chuckle, shaking his head and licking his lips. He didn’t say anything as he grabbed you by the waist, pulling you into him again and pressing his lips to yours. Your eyes closed, your hands slowly moving up to run your fingers through his hair. Peter feeling your fingers tug his locks, took the chance to deepen the kiss. When you pulled apart, your forehead rested onto his, noses nudging together. “Y/N, I’d choose you over her every day.” His breath fanned over you lips, making you giggle and bite your lip, looking into his eyes.

“I’m not just imagining this because of my head, am I?” you joked as Peter laughed and closed his eyes, crinkles lining the corners. When he opened them again, Peter was greeted with a sight that made him weak in the knees. Not from the way 20 minutes ago he was digging around in a collapsed building thinking you were underneath, or the way his legs ran him throughout the city when he had hope you were at the hotel. No, this weak in the knees started as a flutter in his heart, a warmth encasing his body, seeming to pinpoint the small places your fingers delicately touched his skin.

Step 6: Hope that she feels the same way

Peter took your hand in his, threading your fingers with his. “Peter.” You spoke softly, making Peter stop fidgeting with your fingers. “I love you too.” Peter didn’t know how much he needed to hear those words coming out of your mouth. He wrapped his arms around your waist again and hauled you in the air, spinning you around before laying another kiss on your lips.

A/N: I literally couldn’t figure out how to finish this piece, so I just did. Hope you like it and it’s what you wanted hon! Let me know what y’all think!

Tags open!

Permanent: @literal-fand0m-trash @just4muggles @saturn-aka-six @nathaliabakes @whyamihere-bro @colored-confetti @wiseeggspickleslime @btsiguess-kpop @galacticstxrdust @independentgirl @wellhellotherelovey @hollymac79 @delicately-important-trash @emcchi @rauwz @herondalescecilys @chewymoustachio @smilexcaptainx

Marvel: @hahaboop @laic2299

Peter: @danielabetancourth @darktwistydiamond @pastelsweaters-and-bubble-t @missmulti @sovereignparker

[donaidk]

Rhythm of Time - Part II

Happy New Years everyone! Wanted to get at least one more part out before the end of the year 🤪 so here it is, before I get back to the other two in the works. Next one will probably be a bit more action filled, but I just wanted to let you guys into the background story behind the main character, for now 😉

As always, every kind of feedback is appreciated ❤️ Thanks for reading!

Part I | You’re here | Part III | ...

Getting back from the winter break was a lot more exciting this time. Knowing that I will have a bigger role in the team’s life meant I couldn’t wait to finally get back to them. For example pre-season testing was usually not the most interesting part of the season, I still felt like it was the biggest event of the year. I knew it would just get better with the races, but at that second it was everything I was hoping for. I couldn’t even care less about having to work with Mick, as it felt like I was floating over cloud nine because of the few days I got to work in a position that gave me so much control. The only thing I hoped for was it not getting into my head too much. No one really needed me acting like a bitch who knew she could easily break someone’s online character before getting kicked off the team. Mick was a tad bit lucky that I wasn’t truly angry at him.

Travelling to Australia made everything seem even more real as I had to manage all the press day activities even before we got to the country. I knew it won’t be easy work, but I was still looking forward to it and was able to do everything with a smile staying on my face as I actually enjoyed planning everything and not just looking at the plans someone else put together. That was fun too, and the only way you can learn, but after experiencing what it’s like to manage everything myself I would have never changed it back to the original setup. Only if it was the only way to fix a horrible situation.

Arriving at the hotel I knew it would be a night full of turning and tossing as my excitement over the top for the whole flight and car ride to the hotel. I tried having a shower so I could calm down my mind, but as soon as I met up with the team again it just started racing all around the space in my head. We had a little meeting about the next few days in Mick’s room, before everyone called it a night and returned to their rooms. As I wanted to still ask about some of his preferences I stayed with him, as he was packing out a little from his suitcases. I was now just watching him after noting down his answers for my probably dumb questions.

„ Do you usually pack out even for just a few days? ” I asked curiously and saw as his movements stopped for a moment. Thinking about it he probably didn’t expect a question that wasn’t about something professional after what we just went through.

„ Yeah, usually. It feels more organized. ” He shrugged a little, getting out some more t-shirts as I realised I should probably leave. It wasn’t something that strangers should watch you do. At least that’s how I felt like. Just as I was about to stand up and leave he spoke up again. „ Are you comfortable with working next to me? Working with me? ” He asked, still looking only at his clothes.

„ Why wouldn’t I be? ” I asked back immediately before I could have thought about it. If I had waited just a second longer I would have realised what he’s talking about. Or more like implying. „ When I told you I’m over it, I meant it. I would never say something like that without it being the truth. ” I shook my head gently, still standing up from the chair because I felt like it would be better if I leave after this is over.

„ I know, or more like I hoped so. It just feels shitty to know that I acted that way and now you’re almost forced into working with me. ” He sighed, finally turning to me, although his fingers were still fiddling with one of his sweaters. „ I just know that this is still fun and games but will be a lot harder as the season goes on. I just want to make sure that we’re okay and that you know I can be trusted, even if I fucked up in the past. ” He let go of the cotton, coming closer to me but just as my breathing would have stopped from his proximity, he sat down on his bed.

„ Quite literally, yeah? ” I tried joking with him, but as soon as his expression changed I knew it wasn’t the best decision. „ Hey, I was just joking, we’re okay. I have never thought of you as someone who’s irresponsible just because you did something most teenagers do at least once in their life. ” I shook my head, still smiling so he could be sure that I meant what I said.

„ I know most people take part in it at least once, but I have never been like them. I can’t really be like them ever. Still I don’t want to be treated better than how they would be. ” He sounded anxious and I felt like he wanted me to be mad at him, because he thought he wouldn’t deserve how I treated him.

„ I don’t give a shit about who you are. ” I blatantly told him, probably stopping his rambling. „ I’m not mad at you, because you did nothing wrong. If you would do something stupid and would have treated me wrng while we were together, you wouldn’t like to be in the same room as me. Your name couldn’t have saved you from my fury. ” I shrugged looking him straight in the eyes so he would finally understand and accept the situation. „ The only thing I want you to do is to forget about it finally. The quicker we stop talking about it, the less awkward situations we’re gonna have in the future. '' I added as a last thing, so we could fully close this chapter of our life.

„ Understood. Never bringing it back up again. ” He let out a sigh but was finally accompanied by a smile on his face. I was about to stand up and leave finally, when his expressions changed again and I knew he will speak up. „ When did you change your name? ” He asked, making my eyebrows furrow as for a second I didn’t understand his question.

„ Oh… a little after we met. After my birthday. ” I answered, but felt like it was the perfect moment to leave, before we would go too far with this topic. „ It’s my mum’s. Felt more comfortable living with this one. ” I shrugged a little, as I got to his door and opened it so I could finally leave. I quickly wished him a goodnight before turning towards my own room and crossed the hallway to get to it in just seconds.

The next few days still felt awkward, even more because of him bringing up my dad in a way, but I tried to get over it and hoped he wouldn’t ask a lot more about the person I always tried to close off from my life. Even if I could never fully accomplish my plan as he would still be my father and he will be connected to me in a way forever. Luckily with the race weekends time seemed to fly by at 5 times speed and forgetting was a lot easier when you had to focus on your job and tasks. We were already at the fifth circuit when I realised that we finally got over our past and could have conversations without even touching onto it.

As for racing, Mick was doing quite well. He was still deemed new to the F1 cars and the other drivers, but he took on the challenges and did his best. We all knew he won’t be winning the championship this year, also with a Haas car, although we never really talked about this in front of Günther, but he still pushed it to the limit and got everything out of it. Sometimes he asked for more than what it had, but he always caught it in time and got it under control, before anything could have happened. I was mostly just happy that my job only involved the outside world, and not the one inside the cockpit. My nerves could barely handle watching the races now that I knew someone quite personally from the grid. I knew most of the drivers and had talked to them on several occasions, but I never really got close to them. Mick was really something else compared to them, as I spent almost everyday following him, and we never really stayed silent as we attended interviews one by one before and also after practices, qualis and races too. I could say that I did not feel regret when I thought about my decision I took just a couple of months ago.

Even when we arrived in Spain at the beginning of the week, and realised how hot it will be on the weekend, I did not regret having to walk around the paddock almost 24/7 for three days in a row. I wasn’t the only one affected by the heat wave as everyone in the garage moved around slower than usual. They mostly got themselves together for Sunday, as I was quite surprised to see the speed at which everyone was running around when we entered after all the interviews were done. While Mick had to go get ready I took a seat next to the engineers and let everyone else work around us while I took one of the headsets so I wouldn’t lose my hearing this soon.

„ Everything good? ” Pete, Mick’s engineer asked from next to me, as he turned towards me with the headset pushed off of one of his ears.

„ Yeah, he’s doing well. Composed but still confident, whatever they ask him. ” I nodded a little, while I almost blindly got the team profile open so I could make sure it was up to date. „ Is she already here? ” I asked back, knowing that Corinna wanted to attend today’s GP to support Mick.

„ Yes, I saw her talking to Günther but she tried to stay away from the garage. She probably wants Mick to focus on the job and not her. ” He shrugged a little, looking back at the screens in front of him when someone from the mechanic crew came up to him with a question.

Mick was already in the car, seconds away from leaving the garage when his mum showed up. She still stayed in the background until they were given the sign and both cars could enter the pitlane. I sent her a small smile when she passed me, giving up my seat gladly, so she could watch the race and be close to the radio, as I was completely fine with watching it on the screens that were set up for the mechanics. I didn’t really get to talk to her yet since the start of the season, but she seemed kind and I looked up to her for coming to races, even after everything that happened to their family. It meant a lot to her son, every time she came out to support him. Even I could tell, seeing it from the outside.

Both of the Haas cars took the start perfectly, taking up better positions for most of the lap before they all started fighting each other. After the first few laps I went to get myself a coffee, before sitting back down in the garage out of the way as I didn’t really want to block the mechanics if there was going to be a pit-stop or anything. They were just about to call both of them in when we saw Mick spin at turn 10, sliding off the track into the gravel trap, right until the tyre barrier caught the car. My hand stopped in the middle of lifting the mug to my lips, as I watched him crash and hoped that they would show him getting out of the car as soon as possible. I let out the breath that was stuck inside my lungs when I heard Pete talking to him as it meant he was fine enough to communicate. I immediately felt pathetic about my reaction and tried to just slip into the background before someone would spot the worry on my face I was experiencing inside.

Turning towards the engineers I saw Corinna shift in her seat uncomfortably, probably listening to Mick explaining what happened. It wasn’t a horrible crash but there was always a possibility for injuries whenever they hit each other or the barriers. We watched relieved as he finally climbed out and left the car with the marshals, and got onto a golf cart that brought him back to the garage. He was checked out by the team doctor as soon as he got back and was fortunately cleared by him for any serious injury. I let Corinna talk to him before I would bring up having to talk to the reporters.

I only went into his room when the race ended and I knew we would have to leave for the media pen if we wanted to be on time. He was already changed back to team clothing with a little ice pack on his left wrist while holding his phone in his other hand. I cleared my throat to get his attention and he immediately looked up at me, before pushing himself off the bed. I let him leave the garage hallway first, following him as we aimed for the people already standing around the cameras.

„ You only have two. If you feel dizzy or anything just let me know and we can leave immediately. Everyone will understand. ” I told him when I caught up to him. I always hated how I was almost running next to everyone if they were walking at their normal speed, thanks to my shorter legs.

„ I’m fine. ” He answered shortly, looking mostly at the ground in embarrassment. He didn’t seem happy, and I knew that his mood probably won’t change for the day.

He still forced a small smile onto his face when we got to the pen and he held it right until he answered the last question. I was proud of him for how he held himself together even though I knew inside he was angry at himself and how the day went. I followed him back to the garage, being the first one to enter so I could get my things from inside. I waited for him to get his backpack and we left together.

„ What a shitshow of a race it was. ” He let out a sigh as we were walking through the paddocks, towards the parking lot. „ And in front of my mum… ” He added with a sigh, pushing his hands into the pockets of his jeans.

„ Everyone crashes once in a while. Corinna was probably just happy to see you get out of there. ” I shook my head a little looking up at him. „ There’s always next week when you can try again. ” I added, trying to lift his spirits even though I knew it probably won’t help.

We were just about to get into the car when someone called my name from behind us, and I knew from just the voice who it was. Stepping away from the door I motioned for Mick to get in so they could leave before my dad caught up to us. I let out a sigh as I watched the car leave and I turned back to see my dad just seconds away from reaching me. I really wasn’t in the mood to talk to him, although I couldn’t remember the last time I felt like talking to him for longer than exchanging a quick ’hi’. Somehow I felt like this won’t be a simple conversation about me getting a real job or about how my siblings are. It was never that straightforward with him.

[hrh-selene-r]

Beyond Words (4/?)

The Big Sweep

Eight years have come and gone, and it seems that everyone has moved on; Hannah has a new life with a Baby upstate, and even Ray found a bit of happiness in his life, but where does that leave Adam? Still in the same apartment with the same problems. Now, feeling adrift in the stagnation he finds himself in, Adam will try to break old habits and  see if he can grow-up. Something easier said than done, that is until he meets you.

This is a bit of a post series/retcon picking up from where Adam’s story left off in Season 6 episode 8 titled “What will we do this time about Adam?”

Adam Sackler x Reader

4.5K Words

Warning: Angst, break up, Depression, cursing.

It’s been a week of secret apartment hunting and script reading for any new possible project, but his efforts finally bear fruit. ‘Fucking Ray. Thank god he came through’ Adam thought as he was one the line of his favorite deli just a few blocks away from his apartment. He shifts anxiously as he rehearses in his mind what he wants to say to Jessa when the moment comes.

It’s been a week of secret apartment hunting and script reading for any new possible project, but his efforts finally bear fruit. ‘Fucking Ray. Thank god he came through’ Adam thought as he was one the line of his favorite deli just a few blocks away from his apartment. He shifts anxiously as he rehearses in his mind what he wants to say to Jessa when the moment comes.

‘Jesus. Fuck’ He fixes his hair fidgeting (well dreading, really) the confrontation to come. Her clinginess hasn’t stopped in the least, wanting to go out together, stay in together, have sex in their old haunts; she’s even been texting him more frequently. It’s not that he didn’t like the attention (or the sex), but Jessa’s always been aloof, and independent. If anything, Adam is the clingy one; things used to be so easy before but this change in dynamic was a bit jarring to him, to say the least.

‘She’s just making things harder’

He was a thousand miles away when he finally sat down, and in true Adam fashion, he doesn’t eat, so much as he scarfs down his meal; six eggs (four of them just the whites), and two slices of turkey bacon. It’s while drinking what’s left of his coffee that his phone alerts him of a new incoming text. Fishing it out of his pocket and saw that he had three texts; two from Luke, letting him know that he got the callback for the Jim Anderson play with the details of where it’s going to be, the other asking if he had finished reading another script that he’d sent him.

‘Yesssssss!!’ He cheered on the inside, holding in his urge to scream it out loud. Finally! At least some things were looking up.

The other text was from Jessa, making fun about one of her classmates, with a rather mean spirited snarky remark.

He scoffs a bit after reading it, her smarmy wit coming through her words. It's moments like these that remind him of their friendship, and their shared chemistry. The thought only served to churn his stomach, bringing to the forefront of his mind what he’ll tell her.

‘ “Look Jessa, I’ve been doing some introspection lately, and I’ve come to the conclusion that we’re better as friends and that I need some time apart” Too formal? No….Shit! “Jessa let’s be real, you would’ve left me in a few months anyway, so I’m doing us both a favor” ..’

“Motherfuck!” He hissed under his breath.

He looked at the time in his phone and got up. He has to get going, not wanting to be late to meet his building manager.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The building itself wasn’t too far, it was still in Brooklyn, not like he could afford anything more upscale, and even then, rents in the boroughs were outrageous; gentrification saw to that. But for all the artisanal ice cream boutiques and organic green tea, there’s a charm in Brooklyn that has captured his heart; for now, this was home. This place has seen his loves and loses and has seen him at his worst and at his best.

Adam walks up to the front steps where a woman is sitting on the stoop, seemingly waiting; looking at her phone as she does so. She looks up and sees him in the eye, causing him to look away awkwardly to avoid her thinking he was a creep or something, but her gaze was more curious than anything.

She tilts her head sideways to get a better look at him. “Adam?”

‘Do I know her? Oh fuck, have I fucked her?’ he thinks, his mid going through the roster of girls to see if he knew her from somewhere. “Yeah?” he asked cautiously after his mind came up blank. He doesn’t know her....at least he thinks he doesn’t know her.

“I’m Jaime. I’m the building manager? My dad probably told you about me when he showed you the apartment.” She explains, hopefully jogging his memory, as she gets up to face him.

“You’re Jaime?” He asks, taking a good look at her. Her hair is long and dark up, reaching up to her waist; her body, clothed in oversized jeans and a black tank top, is skinny but not too skinny as to make her look malnourished, her complexion is dark, coupled with deep brown eyes, a wide nose full glossy lips and a beauty mark above her left eyebrow.

“Yeah, were you expecting anyone else?” she smirked haughtily at him, making him to quickly reply out an answer to avoid any embarrassment.

“No! I just thought that I’d be meeting your dad.” he corrects himself and holds out his hand to shake her hand in greeting. She responded in kind, extending her hand to shake his. Her hand was adorned by wide silver rings in her fingers, her nails were decorated with an orange nail polish that was mostly chipped away.

“He got held up, asked me to do it. Legally I can, as the building manager. So, you ready to sign?”

“Uh, Yeah.” he answers her as she gestures for him to follow her, leading him up the stairs to what will be his new apartment.

Climbing three flights of stairs, standing in front of a door marked ‘3A’, Jaime places the key in the lock and opens the door before gesturing for him to go in.

The apartment itself was big, or big for New York standards, at least, It was a one bedroom apartment, complete with a separate living room, the bathroom was down the hallway, and with a small kitchen right next to what could be converted to a small dining room. It suited him. The apartment was eerily reminiscent of the one he lives in now, the most remarkable difference is that the kitchen has a separate countertop for a bar, not to mention that the living room was roomier, with a tall window providing the space with a good amount of natural light.

It was thankfully in his budget, and that’s what mattered to him the most, nevermind the fact that he basically found an affordable apartment with this much space; which to be clear, is nothing short of impossible.

The pair start to walk into the empty living room space. “You’re lucky you were able to snag this place. We haven’t gotten the word out yet, or anything about this place. So you got the exclusive first look.” Jaimie mentions as she walks to the kitchen counter, grabbing the papers and the pen.

Not knowing how to respond to her and him having his own special brand of social skills , Adam just answers with a simple “Yeah.”

“If anything you’re lucky you know Ray, being on the city council makes you meet a lot of people in the community; and stick-in-the-mud Ray knows a lot of people.” She smiles at him.

“Yeah well we’ve been friends for a while, now.” He replies to her with a polite smile back.

“Yeah. Anyway, this is the contract.” Jaime changes the direction of the conversation to the issue at hand, sliding the contract file in his direction with a pen in her hand.

“Sign here, and here….I need initials here.” She directed him as he started to sign the papers, trying to keep up with her quick directions.

Once it was finished, she handed him a stack of papers. “Okay, so this is your copy of the lease, and these are your keys. Heads up.” She dangled the keys before throwing them in his direction for him to catch, moving towards the exit to leave to the privacy of his new place. Stopping at the door, Jaimie looks back to face him as he turns around to face her.

“So you already know my name. Rent’s due on the first. If you need anything, my apartment’s on the first floor; apartment ‘1B’. If you need me but I’m not in, just slip a note under my door. ‘Kay? Any questions?”

“Uh, nope.”

“Then it’s a pleasure to meet you Adam Sackler. Welcome to the building.” With that she gave him a small smirk and waved goodbye, shutting the door behind her on her way out; leaving him alone with his thoughts in his new apartment.

It’s official now, he can’t put it off anymore. He’s following the advice Ray gave him; hell, even Josh said it. Here, in the emptiness of his new space, in the bright white light of day, he finally sees what he’s been avoiding for so long.

He loved her, he cared for her, but was he ever in love with her?

He was just as quick to get back to her as soon as he realized that things with Hannah wouldn't work out. He quickly left Jessa once he found out that Hannah was pregnant and….’I don’t know.’ ‘Maybe I’m with her ‘cause it’s easy...I’m so fucked up!’ Adam furiously scrubbed his face with both hands, breathing deeply and exhaling through his nostrils.

Alone, in the middle of the empty apartment, bathed in the light from the windows, he knew. It was just like that time; he knew what he had to do.

It was time to rip the band-aid off.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later in the day, after doing a few errands he had to do for the new place, Adam was standing outside of his (old?) apartment building. Looking at the window of the apartment, he takes a deep breath, gathering his bravery to face the situation.

He makes the journey up the stairs, and opens the door. The apartment is empty, judging by the hour, Jessa’s probably still in class. Taking advantage of the circumstances, he starts packing up his things; his mind making a list of the things to take with him .

‘My clothes, books. It's a good thing I don’t have a lot of stuff. I can buy food, and I already got a bed taken care of. I’m gonna have to come back for my work out stuff, my weights and the bench at least.’

Little by little Adam starts to take his favorite things, taking his time to consider what to leave behind. A practice he’s by now well-used to.

The front doors opens and in walks Jessa, her hair in a bun, wearing a loose red tee shirt with denim blue high waisted jeans, the bags in her hand suggest she bought something.

“Hey you in?!” Her voice rings through the small apartment, reaching Adam’s ears, causing him to freeze, inwardly flinching in anticipation of what’s to come. ‘Time to face the fucking music. *sigh*’ He moves out of the bedroom and into the kitchen to find her putting things away on the fridge.

“Heeeeeey.”

“I brought some groceries since the fridge was empty.” she told him casually, her head buried inside the refrigerator as she took things from the bag and placed them inside.

“You have a good day?” His stance is awkward, his hands behind his back as he debated on how to best start the conversation; break it to her while hoping to god that she takes it well.

“Not bad, Nancy is a fucking cunt, but that’s just her. Either way…” Jessa approaches him, pulling him for a kiss, smiling as she does so “She’s just irritates me, so...how was your day?” Her hands run through the familiar course of his chest sweetly. A small shrug moved his shoulders nonchalantly as he looked at her. Was this really it? “It was okay, I did a few errands.”

Hearing this her brow furrowed a bit, looking into his eyes as he stared at her. “You did errands, what errands? Didn’t you have an audition?”

“Yeah, look can we talk?” He asks as he nervously fidgets, gesturing for them to sit down on the couch. If there’s something that can be said about Adam is that he’s as subtle as a hammer.

Sitting on the coffee table in front of her, he nervously passes a hand through his hair, trying to find a way to get what he needed to say out. Jessa looked at him curiously, waiting for him to talk but finding herself growing impatient as the seconds passed.

“So, what did you want to talk about?” She urges calmly.

Adam’s forehead wrinkled in concentration, both of his hands pressed against his face as his fingers covered his eyes. “This isn’t something that I wanna have to tell you. I know this isn’t fair to you, especially after the whole thing with Hannah.”

“I’ve been doing some introspection, or whatever, and um...I’ve been going to meetings…”

“You’ve been going to meetings?” She interrupted, concern etched on her her face as her brows lifted before furrowing in thought.

“Yeah.”

“Well. Have you been drinking?”

“No!” He answered urgently. “I just…” Adam’s lips tense into an outstretched line for a brief moment while he finds a way to verbalize his thoughts.

“I’ve been going to meetings and taking time to think….And…” A few seconds pass. “Fuck” he whispered under his breath in a sigh. “And I’ve come to the conclusion that I; that WE..need time apart.” His eyes searched hers for any indication of understanding or sympathy, but they found nothing. Her gaze was blank as she was deep in thought as he spoke. “ Look, this has nothing to do with Hannah. Whatever she and I had. It’s over, it’s finished.” His baritone voice is soft and calm as he tries to sound as serious as possible. In his mind he is an adult trying to have a serious conversation with his partner. Gone is the lovable boyish demeanor he usually carried; replaced with a grim faced man as he leans over to look at her. His elbows rest on his knees and clasps his hands together, giving away his anxiety.

“I never told you how sorry I am for that...and I hurt you. It’s just that, I don’t know if it was filming the movie or if it was just life in fuckin’ general, but I was reminded of what Hannah and I had. I felt it, so I felt that there was too much history there to not try and set things right. To help her, and be there for her.” The sound of his voice reverberated through the small apartment as he looked at the floor. “ But we’re too different now and want different things. And...Now I feel like I need some space to figure shit out alone. Not just for me, because I really do care about you, Jessa.”

Jessa looks at the ground in silence, not wanting to look at him in the eyes and see her worst nightmare.

“I’m gonna be moving out, take the time to focus on my life. You can stay here, keep most of the stuff. I’ll still pay for your classes. I meant what I said.”

Jessa nods slowly, pursing her lips while processing his words.

“Okay...if that’s how you feel.” Her tone is a bit above a whisper, feigning understanding in her short words. She shrugs her shoulders and crosses her legs on the couch with a nonchalant expression. Like everything else, nothing fazes her.

Adam scoffs at her response, unable to believe how she can be so calm while he was essentially breaking up with her. No, he saw what this was. “ Oh, come the fuck on Jessa, this is just like last time. Do you seriously not give a fuck? I know you feel something. Get angry; hit me, throw something at me. For fuck’s sake, it isn’t good to bottle everything in...Just tell me how you feel.”

A deep sigh went through her nose, her eyes showed that something was beneath the surface as she shakes her head slightly and looks at him. “What do you want me to say? You haven’t done anything wrong. You’re communicating; and if this is how you feel, then there’s no point in fighting against it.”

‘Un-fucking-believable.’ Adam moves his left hand towards his cheek, lightly scratching at the hairs in his stubble. “That doesn’t mean that you’re not feeling anything; that your feelings aren’t valid.” He lets out a breath of frustration as he realizes that she put up her walls to him and she won’t budge. ‘The hitting and screaming would’ve been better.’ “Fine.”

Keeping with her attitude, Jessa clicks her tongue and leans back lazily before asking the dreaded question. “So when do you move out.”

“I was thinking about leaving today.”

“Oh...so you have a place to stay?”

“Yeah, I’m good. My stuff’s mostly packed, and I’ll come back for the rest later...But I wanna make sure you’re okay.”

“Adam, stop worrying! You’ve done nothing wrong. If you feel you have to do this; you gotta do what you gotta do.” A sardonic smile graces her face. She makes everything sound so simple; black and white.

He gently grabs her tattooed wrist in his large hand and looks deeply into her green eyes, trying to find a way to get through to her, to really talk to her.

“Hey..I still care about you. okay?” He told her gently, almost as if she were a child.

“Yeah.” Her response was short and curt.

Her walls remain up; impenetrable in their might as she refuses to show him, to show the world an ounce of vulnerability. A defense mechanism that took years in perfecting. An aloof facade she shows the world.

Jessa moves to get up, leaving him alone. Adam’s well aware that this was just a front, Jessa hasn’t changed,. He couldn’t tell how bad it was, but he’s doing this for her too. He knew it’d be worse if he stayed.

No other words were said as she sat crossed legged in their bed, smoking a cigarette while he finished packing. In the back of her mind she wonders if this is what being in a relationship is really like; being off and on, having that person come in and out of your life….It’s what her father did. ‘No’ She knows that’s not true. She’s seen people get married, have families and be happy. And besides, Adam’s not remotely like her father, he’s not like the previous men in her life. He’s different.

She moves to the kitchen, pouring herself a glass or orange juice, pretending that nothing is wrong, desperately trying to ignore his presence. She found it unbearable to watch as he left her for a second time. This time she’s more aware of her feelings for him, and she dreads what will become of them, of her while watching Adam go in and out of the apartment; getting his things downstairs.

He tried to be as quick as possible; throwing this mindlessly into garbage bags, making sure he took only what was important to him.

The hardest part about breaking up is trying to leave and stay on good terms. And he’s attempting to do just that. He figured that if he could do it with Hannah, maybe it was possible with Jessa.

Adam reached into his pocket and fished out his keys, he placed them on the counter beside the sink.

“You take care of yourself, okay?” He said awkwardly, looking at her one last time. His mouth is etched in a pout and his eyes are sullen at her lack of reply, but he still waits a few seconds for her, almost as if he’s waiting for the other shoe to drop. She didn’t say anything, she didn’t even look at him as he made his way out of the apartment.

Closing the door behind him, Adam takes a moment to just stand there, his mouth still set in a pout, his brows furrowed as he feels the weight of what’s happened.

Both lovers stand on either side of the closed door, each hoping that the other would take a step forward to open the door; to go back to the other, but neither one does. Adam stays there, feeling the guilt over what he’s done slowly spread; lamenting not just the loss of his lover, but the loss of his best friend.

‘It had to be done. There’s no point in staying anymore.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Inside of the apartment, Jessa just stood there, staring at the door; willing him to come back to her. Her face morphs from boredom to one of pure heartbreak. Her eyes start to water as her breathing changes to an erratic pace.

In the cold emptiness surrounding her, she couldn’t pretend anymore. Her mask vanishes, revealing the abandoned girl underneath, watching as her friend walked out of their home and her life.

This time she can’t pretend that it doesn’t hurt; can’t deny the devastation she feels as her world blurs. She places the palm of her hands over her eyes as the tears overflow.

‘He’s done this before, and he came back; he’ll do it again.’ She reasons in her desperation, clinging to the idea that Adam will be back, that this is just a pattern. Because the alternative would be to accept that he left her for good.

‘Fucking Hannah!’ As she cries her thoughts become more chaotic. ‘Don’t go. Don’t do this to me.’ Her inner voice cries as she slides slowly towards the floor, bringing her knees towards her chest.

‘This is just how he is.’ She reasoned, still expecting him to come back, her mind repeating his last words over and over. He did say he cared about her, he still loved her; but as she continued to reason his return, a small part of her feared she was just clinging to an empty promise, that she was stupidly holding on to hope...and that he really did leave her.

The silence inside the apartment is maddening, the space is cold; isolated from the world filled only with her small cries.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

He should be used to moving, considering how often he did in the past eight years, but no, it was always a bitch. And the worst part about it? Doing it because of a break up. To say that it was awkward was an understatement, but he needed to end things well off with Jessa. God knows he’s ran into people from his past before enough times to know better. New York may be populated by millions of people, but it can turn into a very small place, when Karma feels like it. It’d be worse if he didn’t do it this way, he’s sure of it.

After getting the last of his things upstairs, he starts unpacking bit by bit. He doesn’t have a refrigerator yet, or a bed for that matter; those come in tomorrow, but Adam has been through worse, and one day without furniture hardly phases him. That being said sleeping on the floor isn’t something he’s looking forward to. Plus, this is what friends are for isn’t it? ...to crash on their couch when needed?

Adam takes his phone out, scrolling through the few contacts saved in it. He could ask Ray; it wouldn’t be the first time he’d stay at his place, especially after a breakup. He could also ask Josh, he had offered his couch to let him crash before; maybe the offer’s still on the table.

‘Screw it.’

He hits on Josh’s contact and places the device next to his ear, waiting for a response on the other side of the line.

“Hey.” Josh’s deep voice sounds through the phone’s speaker.

“ Heeeey...listen, I got a favor to ask, if it’s not too much trouble, or whatever.” Adam started nervously, scratching his head as he talked.

“Yeah, man. Shoot.”

“I broke up with Jessa.” He blurted out. “I moved out.”

There was a slight silence on the line before Josh responded. “Well, shit. Do you need a place to stay? Until you find something?”

“I already got a place. I just need a place to crash until I can get the bed and fridge brought in here.”

“ Well you’re in luck, then. I’m actually on my way back from work. I gotta stop to pick up a few things and then I’m headed home.” Josh explained in his easy-going tone; like nothing bothers him at the moment. “ I’ll let Vanessa know; she’s coming over tonight.”

Adam hesitated “ I don’t wanna shit on your plans.”

“ Oh, fuck off. You’re not. Dude, trust me, Ness loves you. She’d be pissed if I didn’t help out. My sofa es su casa.”

Even though Josh can’t see him, Adam smiles at his friend’s words; his teeth peeking out from his lips and the corners of his eyes wrinkle as he does so. “ Yeah, okay. Just let me know when you’re at home. Text me or whatever.”

“You got it. Tonight we’re eating homemade Mexican food.”

“Yeah, Thanks.”

“Alright, see ya.”

With that, Adam hung up, comforted in the knowledge that he’ll be able to sleep in a comfortable, and most importantly cushioned, tonight. At least now he had a place to call his, and by pure stroke of luck, the apartment’s rent wasn’t as high as it could be. He’ll furnish it, little by little. He lives in New York, so someone’s bound to not want a couch somewhere. That leaves the matter of his kitchen. He’d have to buy glasses, plates and food, to at least have the very basics.

‘A bookshelf in the living room. I’ll put my bench in the bedroom...clothes go in the closet, I gotta get a chest or something with drawers..’

He turns to pick up the trash bags storing his clothes, taking them through the small hallway towards his bedroom closet. He’d have to do laundry before the end of the week, he reminded himself as he realized that he was in such a rush to pack everything that he didn’t think that some of his shirts in the bag used to be strewn across the floor of the apartment and stank of sweat.

He spent the next few hours doing what he can, organizing his clothes between what’s clean and what was to be laundered, he took his time to make sure everything was arranged to his liking; a far cry from how he was living 8 years ago. Back when he was an aimless mess living in an apartment cluttered with tools and random pieces of reclaimed wood; when he would rather fuck around with no strings attached than be emotionally vulnerable with someone.

To Adam, it seemed like a lifetime ago. Gone was the aloof fuckboy with an awkward haircut and no direction. Now in his place stands a more empathetic and responsible man.

His thoughts were interrupted as he heard his phone come to life, sounding an alert to let him know he had just received a text and prompting him to look for it. Reaching for his back pocket, he fishes out his phone to see a message from Josh came in saying ‘Just got in.’ on the lit up screen. He’d finish unpacking later; now he was hungry, and Mexican seemed like just the thing…

——————————————————

Hey guys, I’m baaaaack!!!! :D

2020 has been a hell of a year, but I still wanted to end it on a good note. So here we have a short but sweet chapter where Adam wants to leave Jessa to focus on himself, but he knows how fragile and lonely she can be and tries to do it gently....Does it work? We'll have to find out. Safe to say, Jessa will be a reoccurring guest star on this show, so we’ll see how Adam handles this and how he manages to move on. So, leave a comment and let me know what y’all think.

Mucho Love and and a happy New year!!😊

Xoxo Selene R

Tag list for some friends (let me know if you’d like to be added) 

@kowalskibro-adamdriverblog @tsarinastorm @alexdaleks @thrivingamidstchaos @klauscarolove @misskitred @ah-callie @sarcasticbitch @jynz-andtonic @oh-adam @commanderbensolo @kylos-wren @adamsnackler @patersonn-kylo @adamsnacc-kler @ellelaconiwrites @that-only-exists-in-my-mind @ktellmeastory @fallinallinmendes @noocturnalchild

[actress4him]

Whumptober 2020 - Day 24

I kinda got way too into writing this one. I just wanted to keep going and going, really could have added more than I did, and couldn't figure out where to end it...then I realized that tomorrow's prompt was perfect for a part 2. So that's what I did. Yay, our first ever part 2! Anyway, check the warnings if you don't mind some mild spoilers, this one does get a little rougher than some but ahh...I think it's one of my favorites. And it's a good thing so many of you said you love platonic Kidge because here it comes again!

Read on AO3

Read on FFN

Day 24 - Forced Mutism/Blindfolds/Sensory Deprivation

Fandom: Voltron: Legendary Defender

Warnings: restraints, torture, sensory deprivation, electric torture, dislocation, muzzle, broken bones, mild blood

Pidge was getting aggravated. Scratch that, she was way past the point of aggravation, she was ticked off. It had been four quiznaking days since the quiznaking Galra had captured her, and she had just been sitting in this quiznaking cell ever since, for no quiznaking reason. Nobody had even come to see her! No threats, no questions, no torture, nothing. What was the quiznaking point of capturing a Paladin of Voltron if you were gonna just ignore her?

Not that she was, like, dying to be tortured or anything. More than once since her arrival, screams had echoed down the hall, sending shivers down her spine and making her stomach turn somersaults. 

No, the thought of being tortured definitely terrified her. But she was getting pretty sick of sitting in an empty cell with her ankle chained to the wall. The only interaction she’d had so far was with the stupid sentries that brought her food, and they couldn’t carry on a conversation to save their precious Empire. She was lonely, okay? Yeah, she was an introvert who could spend days on end locked in her room, but that was on her terms, and she had her computer and projects to keep her company. 

At least being lonely meant that she didn’t have to worry about any of her teammates. They were out there, looking for her, she knew it, and that was the best place for them to be. If any of them had ended up in there with her and got hurt...she didn’t know what she’d do. They were her family. Yeah, she still believed Matt and Dad were out there, and she was bound and determined to find them. But this team was her family, too, in a weird and wonderful way, and she’d do anything to keep them safe. 

Finally, on the morning of day five, the cell door creaked open, and somebody who actually wasn’t a sentry stepped inside. 

“It’s about time,” Pidge snapped before the soldier even had time to speak. “You guys don’t get in a hurry around here, do ya?”

The Galra - a lieutenant by the design of his armor - was taken by surprise for an instant, but quickly recovered with a smirk. “My profuse apologies. We’ve had...other pressing matters to deal with. But rest assured, you have our full attention now.”

Pidge gulped. Well that wasn’t really what she wanted. But she wasn’t going to let him know that. She lifted her chin.  “Good.”

His smile grew. “Since you’re so eager to see me, should I assume that you’re ready to cooperate?”

Crossing her arms, Pidge narrowed her eyes. “Never. I don’t even care what it is you want from me.”

“A list of planets that have joined your Coalition,” he immediately replied. “See, nothing too complicated. Not even anything to do with your beloved Voltron.”

“Yeah right. I told you, it’s not happening.”

“Very well.” The lieutenant nodded amiably. “I had a feeling that would be your answer. That’s why I came prepared.” Leaning back, he knocked twice on the wall next to the door.

Pidge sneered. “It doesn’t matter what you bring in here, I’m not gonna -”

She cut off her own tirade as two grunt soldiers appeared, dragging and then harshly shoving something very person-looking onto the floor. It wasn’t until the something had tumbled a couple of times and came to a halt facing her that she was absolutely sure that it was a person. A very human-like person. A very battered person. 

He wore only a pair of tight black pants that reminded her of her own flight suit, and all his skin above that was painted with purple and blue and even black in some places. More disturbing than that, though, was what covered his entire face. A blindfold, for starters. And over his nose and mouth, a hideous metal contraption with thick straps holding it in place. 

It was a muzzle. 

Pidge was already feeling nauseous at seeing this guy’s state. But then she noticed the hair. And that’s when her stomach plummeted to her toes. 

“Keith?”

It couldn’t be him. He wasn’t supposed to be here. She would have known if he had been here the whole time, being... being hurt, being tortured...oh quiznak, it hadn’t been him she had heard screaming...had it?

“Ah, so you do recognize him.” The lieutenant chuckled, crossing over and nudging at Keith’s metal-covered chin with the toe of his boot. “It is a bit difficult with his... accessories.”

“What did you do to him? Keith!” She didn’t even care that the tears clogging up her throat were very much audible.

“Oh, don’t strain yourself trying to get his attention, dear. He won’t be able to hear you.” Crouching down, he grabbed a handful of that unmistakable black hair and yanked until Keith’s head and shoulders were up off the ground and his face was turned to the side. A muffled moan came from under the muzzle, and Pidge’s heart squeezed.

“You see this?” The Galra pointed to Keith’s ear, where she could just barely make out something purple. “Blocks all sound.” He released the hair, and Keith’s head dropped to the concrete floor with a crack that made her flinch. “Just like this blocks all light -” he ran a finger over the blindfold -“and this, of course, keeps him from speaking.” He grabbed the muzzle and shook it. “He can still make some quite delightful sounds, though. All of it works together to make doing things like this so much more entertaining.”

One of the soldiers stepped forward, producing a long stick from somewhere on his person and jabbing it into Keith’s ribs. It crackled with purple lightning, and he screamed, writhing on the floor.

Pidge lurched forward, despite already knowing that her leash wouldn’t let her reach him. “Stop! Stop it, don’t hurt him!”

The lieutenant laughed aloud. “It’s perfect, isn’t it? He has no idea what’s coming for him and when.”

The rod made contact again, at his waist this time. The sound that came out of him was awful, literally the worst thing that Pidge had ever heard. She glared at the lieutenant through tear-filled eyes.

“You’re a monster.”

He flashed her a brilliant, sharp-toothed smile. “Thank you. I do try. Now…” Standing, he strode a few steps in her direction. “Would you like to reconsider telling me about those planets, or should we continue?”

No! she screamed inwardly. No, you can’t make me choose. This is the fate of the universe we’re talking about here, but he’s...he’s my brother! A brother that maybe she didn’t know all that well, considering how they both sucked at social interactions, but that just meant she understood him more than the others. Besides, she knew enough. She knew he was brave, and painfully shy, and had a heart of gold beneath his tough-guy exterior. She knew he didn’t deserve this. 

But what could she do? As much as it killed her, she couldn’t throw away the safety of millions of people for him. There was no guarantee they’d actually stop hurting him, anyway. And if they did...he’d never forgive her. Keith always put the safety of others before his own.

“Well?”

Gritting her teeth, she kept her eyes on the terrified, trembling boy on the floor. “I can’t.”

“Very well, then.”

She expected the rod again, but instead both of the soldiers went at him with their heavy boots, pounding the toes into his already destroyed flesh over and over again. He made no noise after the first couple of strikes, only curled in on himself as best he could with his hands cuffed behind his back, instinctively trying to protect his organs. It didn’t matter, though, the sounds the boots made against his body were bad enough. She was pretty sure she heard the pop of ribs breaking. She thought she might puke.

Instead, she sank to the floor with weak legs, crawling forward until the chain was taut and she was as close to him as she could get. The tears that had flooded her eyes until then spilled over, streaming down her cheeks. 

Keith. She wanted so badly to be able to reach out, to comfort him, to let him know she was there. But he wouldn’t know it was her, even if she could. He’d probably flinch away, thinking she was yet another who meant him harm.

“I wonder what he’d think,” the lieutenant began, as if reading her thoughts, “if he knew you were here. If he realized that you had the power to make this stop, that all of this pain was your fault.”

The barb struck true, but Pidge clenched her fists and refused to let it embed itself any further. “Your fault,” she growled. “This is your fault, not mine. You’re the monster here.”

Rather than answering, he reached up and grabbed a chain from the ceiling, pulling it down with a deafening rattle and hooking it onto Keith’s manacles. Taking his cue, grunt soldier number one crossed to a crank on the wall and began to turn. The chain slowly retracted, taking Keith’s wrists with it. Pidge slapped her hands over her mouth to stifle a sob as she saw him realize what was happening and scramble to get his feet under him, slipping back onto his knees more than once before he succeeded, and swaying heavily once he finally stood.

The chain kept going. They weren’t satisfied once it was pulled taut, they kept cranking until he was forced to bend over forward with his arms straight out behind him, and Pidge was worried his shoulders were going to come out of their sockets.

“Stop. Stop it! That’s enough!”

The grinding of the crank halted, and the lieutenant turned to face her. “Yes? Was there something you’d like to share?”

Pidge deflated from where she had risen up on her knees. “N-no.”

“Hm.” He waved a hand at the soldier, and the crank was turned one more time. Keith’s head fell further down.

Grunt soldier number two took the rod and thrust it straight down into the center of his back. Keith almost fell, but somehow managed to lock his knees in the midst of shaking and screaming. 

Pidge’s fingernails bit into her palms and her teeth into her bottom lip. She couldn’t even imagine how that felt on his spine, not to mention the jarring on his overextended shoulders. 

She hated this. The names of the planets he wanted to know were right on the tip of her tongue, a whole list that she had memorized long ago. All she’d have to do is say one, and they’d at least give him a little bit of a break, right?

But just one name meant thousands, possibly hundreds of thousands of people facing this kind of violence in retribution for joining the Coalition. 

It wouldn’t be the boy who she saw as a brother. 

But it would be equally as horrible for so many others. She wouldn’t be able to forgive herself for that, but she wasn’t sure she’d be able to for this, either. 

And she was growing more uncertain by the minute that Keith would forgive her for this.

“Are you sure you have nothing to say?”

Pidge stared straight ahead, refusing to answer.

Circling to the other side of his prisoner, the lieutenant jerked Keith’s head up by his hair again, putting untold strain on his neck. A quiet whimper came from behind the muzzle. “You know, it is a bit of a pity that we can’t see his facial expressions. I just love seeing the pain in their eyes.” Drawing his fist back, he slammed it into the only exposed skin on Keith’s face, his cheekbone, snapping his entire head to the side. When he released his hair, letting his head drop back down toward the floor, there were multiple strands of black hair still stuck between his fingers. Pidge watched them flutter to the floor with a knot in her chest.

“Will you leave him alone? I’m not going to tell you anything!”

“Sorry, dear. No can do. You have to give me something if you want something in return.”

Grunt soldier number one suddenly came back to life, kicking Keith’s knee out from under him. The kick itself probably didn’t hurt. The subsequent stumble that dislocated his shoulder with a loud, sickening crack did.

“No!” Pidge cried, but it wasn’t loud enough to drown out his wail. “Keith!”

“Anything to say?”

“I hope you rot!” she shrieked, lunging forward as if she could get her hands around his throat. “When our team finds us, and they will, I will make sure that you die a slow and painful death!”

The lieutenant threw his head back and laughed. “You’re cute. Maybe once I’ve gotten what I want from you, I’ll just keep you for entertainment. My little pet.”

Keith was still trying to struggle back onto both feet. His breathing was ragged, audible even through the metal, and he trembled even harder than before.

Glancing at a screen on his wrist, the lieutenant sighed. “Unfortunately, I have other matters I must attend to. This seems like as good of a time as any to leave you two to think for a while. Rest assured, I will be back soon.”

With that, he was gone, leaving Pidge with a raw, bleeding ankle and tear-soaked face, and Keith still in a stress position with no senses, wondering when the next blow would come.

“Keith,” she whispered into the once again quiet cell. “I’m so sorry.”

[charmed-asylum]

𝒩ℴ𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃ℊ ℰ𝓁𝓈ℯ ℳ𝒶𝓉𝓉ℯ𝓇

𝒩ℴ𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓃ℊ ℰ𝓁𝓈ℯ ℳ𝒶𝓉𝓉ℯ𝓇 , Chapter 1

Summary: Rosary Woods used to spend her summers in Hawkins. Now years later with untimely death of her father, she sent to live with her grandparents. Coming back to a place that use to give her pleasant memories but now full with dark secrets she hopes never see daylight. Her plan was simple easy till one night she finds a drunk boy full of curls and after life never the same.

FYI: This is my 1st fanfic. I do have dyslexia so if something wrong let me know. If you like it let me know same if you don’t. #Foodie be out this week too. ** Side note I’m looking for some talent ** tag list open

𝑀𝒶𝓈𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝐿𝒾𝓈𝓉

Tagged: @alagalaska @nottherightseason @alias-b @screensirenfic @linkispink1995 @staticscreenwriting

How the hell did all this happened. How the FUCK this happen. How did I end up alone on a dirt road in the middle of nowhere? Cold as hell with a runny nose from my tears and sharp pain of betrayal. I know now. It all started a couple of months ago. When I was tossed into this hickory town. Where one night find a stupid blue eyes boy drunk out his mind. With your stupid Mother, Mary's attitude had to help him. Now that drunk piece of shit made you fall for him to drop kick you in a small amount of a few months.

My brown eyes fill with glittery tears, tried to think back on every step that lead me here what was it? What did I do wrong? What I would do to go back to that night in October. Go back to that day I met that boy that came out of nowhere and changed my life

🍂🍂🍂

The fall air left a warm scent as I walk out the greyhound in my short denim overalls with a plain white short-sleeved shirt and black and white converses with black laces. My long midnight black wavy hair dancing with the wind with my red heart shades on, taking my around at my surroundings. Even though I have been here many times, this was the first time I came that wasn’t summer visits.

Those had an arrival and departure two way this time though was a one way. It was a lot different than home, Florida. It’s always sunny and things to do unlike here. Flipping my cassette player back on I walk over to the rusted metal benches and wait for my ride. I didn’t want to be here. However, when you have no other choice what can you do. My life stuffed in my dad's old beat-up army bag. I lend back hoping this was a dream and I wake up home with my dad not here. I didn’t hate here I just hate why I’m here. The two-day bus rides a dread and didn't help. Still, I’m stuck with nothing to do but cruise under the radar till graduation. Toss the cap in the air and by the time it's back in my hands I have another ticket to somewhere else.

I gentle tap took me out from my inner monologue into reality. An older woman in her 60s with short curly golden frost hair bright red lipstick that got bit on her front tooth in a flower print long dress. In all, she was the fifth unseen golden girl or what I know her as grams.

“‘HELLO ROSARY. You hear me call for you over there by the car” Grams shouts into my ear. Looking up at her I smile and move my bag out the way to hug her tight.

“ Sorry, the meds got me all out of it. Hi, grams it good to see you” I said holding onto the strap of my bag. She gave me a nod and kiss my cheek leaving an imprint.

“ Oh shut I forgot. Sorry, we couldn’t get your flights no airport close by. Sweetie. Grab your bag we can go home” Grams says walking and talking to the car. Tucking my shades in my pocket I follow her music still playing in my ears.

“ Where Papa at,” I asked looking out the window.

“ Oh, he at the diner checking on things. But he will be back by dinner. I sign you up for school. You start tomorrow. Your car will be ship here in two weeks so the bus to school till then” Grams said pulling up to the house. “ Look, honey. I know things have been hard the last few months but coming here can be your fresh start. So it’s up to you what you do. Stay sane try to be different better you dear” Grams said getting out of the car. Simply put it don’t fuck up this time.

“ Yes. Ma’am. I’m gonna the perfect granddaughter” I said with a eat shit grin.

“Don’t do that it’s tacky. I did not mean what I said that way sweetie. Huh lord, I need my soaps. Drop your stuff in your room” Grams said walking into the house.

My room more like a guest room. They tried though I give them that the last time I been here was years ago when I was 11. Then after that was with my dad across seas. By then the damage was done. Walls were eggshell white with a few pictures of me by dad and them that set on the wall by the window. The bed was against the wall with a small glass nightstand with a trunk in front. Probably the same one my dad had when he was my age. The small closet across the bed and an old oakwood dresser. This will do I’m sure in no time she can make it homie. I push my hand on the bed testing out the string a bit. This is my life now. Better just get used to it. Anger bubble deep in my chest as it slowly starts to hit me. This is a life I don't want. I wanted the life I had before one that was far from perfect but he was there. I toss my bag beside me with a bit of force and scream into my hands.

It took no time till I was done. I change up the pictures and some more on my dresser. A few things on the nightstand then to top it off my mint condition organized record collection in a purple crat that sat beside my dad's 1960s Gibson Hummingbird Fixed Bridge acoustic guitar.

“ So you all done. It’s not much but we go somewhere someday. Sorry, papa wasn’t here. After Benny passed away our place been the hot spot. Back to the glory days, he says” Grams said with a chuckle. I sat down beside her legs cross under me and started to flip through Good Housekeeping

“ So Benny no more. Anything else happens since I have been here last” I asked getting comfortable.

“Let's see. That Will kid you babysit a few times went miss for a week or so. Last year. And that’s about it. I don’t pay much attention to those things. Papa and I are going to bible study tonight. I know you not up to it this week. So you don’t have to go but I am looking forward to next week” Grams said. I ruffled my hand into my deep chocolate hair and nod yes.

“ I would love that. Thank you. That reminds me. I have to fill up on my pain killers. If it’s not much to ask can you please take me one day this week? Or may I go into town myself” I asked taking out my pill bottle?

Still, months later the pain reminds the same. Even the memories still were in tack as if it happened minutes ago. A tear rolled down my face just reliving it. Grams hold me tight smoothing me and rubbing my back as I let out a heavy cry. My dainty finger claw into her shoulder blade as tight as possible. I didn’t hate that I was here I just hate the why.

🌙🌙🌙

DADDY!!” I shout out. My body was soaked with a cold sweat and tears still running down my cheeks. Too weak to even move, I bend over cup my hands into my face, and scream.

Always the nightmares. Always the same two each night. Back home I would find a party or smoke or wave to ride but here. NOTHING. I promise a new me I remind myself. One that is not set to explode any second. One that took all their demons and bury it in the deepest hole. This me doesn’t let them loose but keep them hidden tight. That won’t break and burn everything she touches. This me be gentle, kind, and read the Bible instead of throwing my fist. I promise my father that even my estranged grandparents will be better.

After a good pity party, I decided to stay wasn’t gonna help me. I needed to out. I toss on some navy blue gym shorts pull down my Scooby-Doo t-shirt, which was getting a little bit smaller than last time I warn it years ago, decided for a walk.

Grams and Papa came back from church just after 11. Just missing the kids trick or treating. I stay back gave an empty smile say hello few folks who came by or heard over the rumor mill I was back. None who I really care about. The clock blink, 3:00. The cool breeze comforts me like a blanket over my shoulders. Music played close to mute. I thought about it all. If he at peace would I see him again. Could I make it to June in this town?

Far ahead of me on my way back, I saw a figure laying on the crisp grass. After the stories, Grams told me I wonder if it was anything important. As I got closer I saw an outline of a person. I stop and slow my walking this time with caution. Till I was right beside him. He was rocking back and forth humming some song no shirt tight-ass pants and hair messy with no shoes. This boy diffidently was fucking or having a good time. Part of me envies him and that freedom. Another knew it was because even if I don’t say it out loud he beautiful mess. Totally my type and that what it got tricky he was a reminder of the past I was hoping to leave behind. Flipping my hair out my face I got down to eye level and gently touch him.

“ Hey Hey you alright, “ I asked shaking him a bit.

He looks up and grins at me with a sleepy doozy grin. His eyes sparkle in the night sky and for a second I forgot he was drunk. My stomach did this thing I only ever felt a few times before. Back when I was happy. I shook my head and look around for help or at less to see if he drove or had friends. No luck. Part of me thought it be best to leave but then I saw it. Right below his eyes the old bruise and cuts. My jaw tightened till it clicks.

“ Mommy. Mommy” he said touching my face. I felt the cold touch of his ring against my lips. I tap it to the side and wrap his arm around me to get him up. Praying to God he, not a psycho, or I will regret this. He started to kiss my neck all while calling me mommy. Kinky mother fucker

“ Yeah Hot Wheels, not your mommy come on almost there,” I said helping him back home. He giggles and tried to be a handy hand reaching my hip and butt.

“ Holy shit your you are your a doll baby” he slurred into my ear.

Praying any god’s that my grandparents don’t wake up to him almost knocking everything down. I put my hand to his mouth and a finger to mine so he shut up. On the first day of this new me, I’m playing babysitting to a drunk man child. With ease, I toss him on my bed. He cuddles with one of my pillows squeezing my old grumpy carebear and drifts to sleep. I waited a second before I went and made my own special hangover shake and a bucket for the morning. Taking more time time to clean his face a bit and hand as gentle as I could. Time blink at 3:58, I sat on the floor against my dresser and watch him sleep. Wondering if a boy like that had nightmares too.

I woke up two hours later. Still on the floor face left with a carpet imprint. The boy from this morning now turns over to the other side against the wall sound asleep. I got up from my spot on wobbly legs grab some things and head to the bathroom.

As the cold water hit my face I kept thinking about before till the face of baby blue came into mine. His eyes look like way mine when I look into the mirror and it puzzles me. Never have I found someone else that had the same eyes as mine. Apart from me wonder what was behind those eyes. I shack it off as I dry my hair. If the boy's eyes look like mine then that means on things, his demons were just as bad. I change into tacky stuck in time uniform and walk back deep in thoughts when I stop. The boy was gone. I rush out of my room almost tripping over my own foot, empty. Nothing change in my room just the note. It wasn’t till I sat and smell the faint scent of cologne and cigarettes. It wasn’t a dream he was real. I laugh at myself there no way I will be seeing him again.

🍂🍂🍂

He couldn’t remember much just that her face was half cover by her loose curly hair that shines against the streetlight. The innocent big brown eyes that went with a sugar-sweet smile. Even though she was nowhere close to his mom. He couldn’t help but think about her. He never saw someone that beautiful before. Holding on to her tight sniff her in, honey and vanilla. He wanted to stare at her as long as he could but as soon as he hit the twin size bed he was out.

“Fuck am I” he hissed holding his head trying to think what happened last night. Last he remembered was making out with some blonde at the Halloween party or was it sex. His eyes look at the cup and bucket. Brown eye. He slowly picks up the note and read it:

Sleepy Head, First off we did not have sex and no I don’t know you. What I can tell you is this you were drunk and laying on someone's lawn alone. I live on Church street and Maple Lane. If it’s before 6 and your reading this back door

He laughs at the note and put it back where he found it. It was still early Neil wouldn’t be awake if he left now. He thought maybe he leave a thank you but it decided against it. He promised himself no attachment just to graduate, save up, and leave. No room for nothing else. Before he left he heard noises from the bathroom. Sound like a peaceful lullaby. Inching close he peaks in to see a figure from behind the curtain. Shaking his head he slips out and all his Mary way her black and white Adidas flip flops whistling her lullaby.

[thisfoolwrites]

My World

Hello everyone and welcome to my new story. Based VERY LOOSLY on Shameless because I only saw one clip and it gave my inspiration. {Sorry for the crappy title I’m not that creative Dx} Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyuu or Shameless Character: Hajime Iwaizumi Genre: Angst with fluff Warnings: None for this chapter

Mornings in the {L/N} household were usually calm and organized. Yuki and Shouta would be dressed for school and and {Y/N} would have had breakfast ready to go. Usually. Today was not that day. A certain older sibling had forgotten to set an alarm, causing the usually calm mornings to erupt into pure and utter chaos. “YUKI, SHOUTA lets go!” {Y/N} Hollered up the stairs. She clicked her tongue as she got their backpacks together. Slipping the bentos that she had made up last night. She was about to holler again when two sets of footsteps came down the stairs. She let out a sigh of relief as she slipped jackets onto the smaller kids. “No breakfast today?” Yuki's blue eyes bore into her older sisters eyes. This question was not said with any ill intent, but out of childlike curiosity. {Y/N} felt her heart break at the question and just shook her head. “Not today baby, but I promise tomorrow I will wake up bright and early and make you your favorites ok?” Earning a nod of approval from both kids. “Now, were all running late and all I have right now are pop tarts. I'm really sorry guys.” Handing them each a package she made a mental note to buy more just in case. After ushering both kids out of the house and on their way to the school she ran back inside to get her purse and work jacket. In her attempt to lock the door quickly she dropped the keys. As she was leaning down to get them her phone rang. She groaned and answered without looking. “Hello?” she grumbled into the phone. Hoping whoever it was on the other end could sense her frustrations. “That's not very friendly {Y/N}-Chan. And here I was calling to give you good news.” She froze hearing that voice. Almost breaking into tears. “I'm running late for work ShittyKawa, better make it fast.” came her snarky reply, hoping that he didn't hear the break in her voice. She looked at her watch and began to make her way to the train station. Running was no longer an option and she hoped she didn't get fired. Not that she was usually late, but that was always her fear. “Ignoring the out of pocket behavior from you,” So he did notice, she thought, “Me and Iwa-chan will be coming home for a little bit. He’s out of school for spring break, and the team gave us a month vacation!” He finished with a huge smile on his face. She couldn't help but smile. She missed her boys so much. “You both get to buy me lunch for leaving me!” she decided. “For all my pain and suffering.” “Says you Miss Tokyo U!” he laughed along with her. Upon hearing those the weight of everything came crashing back down. “Anyway 'Kawa, I am late for work so I gotta get off. Love and miss you both!” She said and hung up without waiting for a reply. Once on the train she let her thoughts take over. She knew that he would be worried, because her behavior was indeed off, but how was she supposed to tell him that she didn't go to Tokyo U and was taking online classes at night from a local community college? How was she supposed to tell her best friend and boyfriend that her mother up and left leaving her two kid siblings in her care? Sitting down on the seat she glanced out the window. “How do I tell you my life fell apart when yours just began?” She whispered. Hearing her phone buzz she glanced back down at her lap. It was a message from Hajime's mother.

Don't worry about the kids. I'll make sure they come here after school. Take care of yourself as well {Y/N}. She owed that woman so much, and she fully intended to pay her and her husband back.

Oikawa starred at his phone. There was something in the way that she spoke to him. He sighed and closed his eyes. Before he could even form a thought the smell of coffee was right in his face. Opening his eyes he noticed his best friend with two cups. “You are the best Iwa-Chan!” she grinned taking the cup from him. “Yeah yeah. Did you tell her?” Iwaizumi asked him. Oikawa just nodded at him. Before freezing up. “Whats that look for Shittykawa?” “I may not have told her we would be home tonight?” Iwaizumi just starred at him, reminding him of high school. “Well just have to swing by Tokyo to see her tomorrow. It'll be a surprise.” He waved his hand brushing off his mistake. He was supposed to mention that but he was distracted by the break in her voice. “Iwa, have to talked to her recently?” he asked gently. “Its been a few weeks. I called her during finals week and she sounded stressed. To be honest I've been worried about her. My mom wont tell me anything besides its been stressful for her. Not sure what that means. I hope I can take away some of that stress.” Before either boy got a chance to say anything, their flight was called and they boarded the plane.

Nine o'clock rolled around and {Y/N} walked up to the Iwaizumi's door. They had always lived on the same street so it made picking up her siblings pretty easy. When she walked up the steps she didn't even have a chance to knock on the door. Mai Iwaizumi smiled at her and called for the two kids. “Thank you so much for letting them come over today. I promise I'll be off in time to be home for them tomorrow. They just-” “I've told you before its ok. Besides I love these two like my own children. Now, they have eaten so don't let them trick you, and their homework is complete.” {Y/N} Just smiled at the woman. She had always looked up to this woman, hoping one day that this could be her mother. Before the two could converse more, her two siblings barreled into her giving her a bone crushing hug. The four of them just laughed and {Y/N} waved and led the two kids home. Upon reaching their destination they all hurried inside. {Y/N} took their backpacks and sent them upstairs to change and get ready for bed. Dropping her own stuff off at the kitchen table she pulled the empty bento boxes out of the backpacks. She placed them in the sink and silently made a vow to wash them later. She headed upstairs into her own bedroom, ignoring the empty master bedroom to the right of hers. She was about to slip out of her work shirt when she heard her name being called from the room over. Heading on over she noticed both kids curled up in Shouta's bed. Smiling she headed into the room and crouched down by the bed. “Whats up guys?” she asked softly, with a gentle smile on her face. Shouta just got a wide smile on his face. “We played volleyball today in PE and the teacher said I have a talent for it. I was wondering if there was anyway I could join the volleyball club.” Shouta asked. {Y/N}'s smile dropped a bit before she  placed a hand on his head. “I know you wanna play volleyball Sho, I understand, I do. But we just cant afford it right now.” she said softly, stoking the little boys head. His smile vanished but he just nodded his head. Money had been tight and his sister was working two jobs just to pay bills and put food on the table. Shouta mumbled a goodnight before rolling over and pulling the blanket over his head. {Y/N} Sighed and picked up Yuki and took her to the girls own room. The smaller girl watched as her sister tucked her in. “Hey {N/N?}” she quietly called causing the older girl to look at her. Yuki may have been only nine years old, but she could just see the sadness in her sisters eyes. “Do you think mommy will ever come home?” {Y/N} felt her heart break. She gently smiled and rubbed the top of Yuki's head. “I don't know baby. We'll cross that bridge when we get there.” She bent down to give her a kiss on the head. “Night Yu.” she said quietly closing the door. She peeked into Shouta's room to see that he was sound asleep. She smiled softly before closing his door and heading downstairs. She sat down at the kitchen table and put her head in her hands. Some days all she wanted to do was break down and cry, but that voice in the back of her head told her to be strong. She stood up and quietly made herself some food. Taking a glance at the coffee pot she debated whether or not to make a cup. Deciding against it because of the chaos this morning she grabbed her plate and headed on up to her room to work on schoolwork. When she sat down she noticed that she had missed messages on her phone.

Haji: Hey you up? Haji: If you are awake can you call me so I can hear your voice? I miss you. Looking at the time she decided against calling him. It wasn't that she was ignoring him, she just didn't know what to say and it was getting late. After setting a few alarms on her phone, to make sure they get up on time, she quickly set off on finishing up her essay for class. It wasn't the degree she wanted but right now she couldn't be picky. She needed to get a better job to provide for her siblings. And she was determined that she was gonna do right by them, unlike their mother. She glanced at the photo beside her laptop. It was her and her dad when she was 14. How she missed him. Fate worked in cruel ways sometimes and taking her father had been the cruelest to her. She shook her head to get rid of all the sad thoughts swirling around in her head. She would have all the time in the world to mope once she finished school. Once she did that she would work on getting the kids out of Miyagi and to a place where everyone wouldn't look at them in pity. Its the kids whose mother abandoned them. She wanted a place where they wouldn't look at her in pity. She didn't want to be known as the girl who turned down a full ride scholarship to Tokyo University anymore.

[djemsostylist]

Storytime

So, yesterday I went to Ikea to acquire myself some furniture to organize my craft supplies for my burgeoning crafting habit.  I needed to acquire a useful Thing to put things in.  And Ikea is that best place to find Things.  

There are a few important things to note as I start this story.  The first is that this is the first time I had been to an actual store that did not sell food in like seriously a year, so I was very excited (having just been vaccinated you see).  This might have contributed to the “not thinking things all the way through bit” as it was also the first time I was around large crowds, which in general I dislike but after  a year of grocery shopping solo at 6 am was a bit overwhelming.  The second thing is that I almost never go to Ikea without backup--which leads us to perhaps the third important bit, which is that Ikea furniture is very heavy.  Like, I mean, it’s wood and wood is heavy but it’s just A LOT heavier than you think it would be. 

So anyway, I go to the place in Ikea where the Thing is, and I contemplate the box.  Now, the box is heavy.  The Thing has many drawers and there is a moment where I’m like “wait, is this too heavy?”  But I sort of wiggled it a little and then I could slide it pretty easily off the stack of other Things and onto the bottom part of my cart, so I’m all “See, this is gonna fine!”  Now, the Thing does make the cart harder to push, but I’m moving, I get through self check out, and it’s fine. 

Here comes the fuck up bit.  I get out to my car, slide the Thing off the cart onto the asphalt behind my trunk, and that’s when I realize, I can’t move it.  Like, literally at all.  The box itself isn’t big, but I quite literally cannot shift it.  After a two attempts to even maneuver it into a position in which grabbing it would be feasible, I’m forced to realize--I need a man. 

Now, there are very few times in my life where I think to myself “I need a man.”  I’m an independent person and I can do most things on my own (although when my dad offers to put air in my tires I never say no) but this moment, standing in the Ikea parking lot with a giant box crushing my left foot and the trunk at least two feet away, I really, really wanted a man.  

So then I was faced with three options.  Option one was finding an Ikea worker to help me.  This would likely be the best option, as I think there are people at Ikea whose job it is to load things for you.  The issue is, you generally tell them that *before* you leave, not when you have a box crushing your foot in the parking lot and you are going to have to leave it sitting on the pavement while you go find a person because not only can you not get it in your car you also also can’t even get it back on your cart.  So then you have to hope that while you search for help no one steals the Thing you bought and also that you don’t die of shame while finding a person and explaining the current situation.  

Option two was finding a Random Man.  Or, hoping one finds me.  Which means either flagging down a man who looks like they could lift the Thing into my cart or struggling enough that a kindly one is like “this weak armed girl is going to kill herself or cause property damage let me prevent this.”  This option is not my favorite, bc there are a few choices of man I could get.  My greatest hope was finding an older man who sees me and thinks “if my daughter were struggling alone in the parking lot, I would want someone to help her” bc that is what my dad would do (and also why I never go to Ikea without my Dad but this is a pandemic and he is not vaccinated and I was trying to be a good daughter.) The other options are all some variation of young guy close to my age who I have to make small talk with and also try not to die of embarrassment while trying to explain why the box is crushing my foot and stuck on the pavement bc I thought I could do this but actually I can’t and please don’t look at me bc I might actually not make it through the horror of this moment--and yeah.  The best possibility was finding a dude who would load my thing and move on with barely any talking, but there is really no guarantee of that happening-- pls understand that I am not looking for this to be my meet-cute story, okay?  

The third option was prayer.  Now, I don’t actually believe in God so this one was the one that seemed the most far fetched, but as prayer is internal, also the one least likely to cause me to die of mortification.  Because God surely isn’t going to judge me for wanting to try and be independent (and also surely He understands my anxiety surrounding asking for help from people not @bonesingerofyme-loc) so if I prayed hard enough to a God I don’t believe to not make me die of embarrassment in the parking lot of an overcrowded Ikea in the middle of a pandemic, surely He would help right?  

You know how they say when people are in danger they get floods of adrenalin and moms can lift cars off babies or whatever?  Well, call it God, call it my absolute unwillingness to ask for help, but somehow, I bent, I prayed, and I lifted the Thing into my car.  To this moment I still don’t know how I did it, but one moment I’m bent over the box going “okay, but seriously this is so not ending this way” and then next, the Thing is in the back of my car.  

The question of “how am I getting it up a flight of stairs into my apartment” was easily answered by “take in one actual piece at a time from the box” which I did in only 5 trips.  

And that is the story of how I wished for a man in the parking lot of an Ikea and actually probably got help from God instead to save me the embarrassment of having to ask for help from an actual man.  It also is the story of how in the future I will ask a worker before I leave bc that is far less embarrassing than an unmovable box on the pavement tbh. 

[wu-sisyphus-gang]

Motion Sickness 177: Let Me Have This Moment

pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq

Weiss and I were waiting at the airfield. I glanced around way over Weiss’s head. Travelers were coming and going. Embarking and disembarking on ships of all sorts of sizes. Massive cruisers and the lingering Atlas Battleships swept up and down onto the airstrips. Smaller private liners landed and took off like little gnats compared to the larger ships. 

“So…” Weiss began. She was searching for her words carefully. “So I was thinking.”

“Okay? This doesn’t sound good.”

“It’s nothing bad. Don’t be a coward. Well, it’s not necessarily bad.”

“Shoot.”

“I think we should stop trying. It’s been a month and nothing has come of it. And if I’m getting married within the next nine months I don’t want to get married pregnant. We can start trying on our honeymoon again. Does that sound alright?”

“That’s really your decision.”

“You have a say too.”

“Do I though?” I asked. “Could I really demand that you keep trying when you just said you don’t want to? Could I actually? Think about it. It’s your body. What you say goes.”

“Is that really fair?”

“Pretty fair. You’re the one who would have to carry the thing.”

“Baby,” she corrected. “We call those ‘things’ babies.”

“Yeah that. One of those,” I agreed. “An infant. You’d be the one dealing with hormones and weight changes and body changes and pushing it out and feeding it and mood swings. What am I gonna do? Ejaculate and evacuate? There’s nothing I could do to help.”

“You’ll be there suffering along with Ruby and I. There will be two pregnant women for you to attend to at once. You will suffer, don’t worry.”

“Yay?” I wondered. 

“So, I think we should stop trying until we have the wedding. What’s our budget look like for that?”

“Under two million?”

“You have no idea how much weddings cost, do you?”

“Under two million.”

She whacked me in the chest with the back of her hand and smirked up at me. 

“Well, yes. But with just our small group of family and friends it can’t be more than two hundred thousand. And that’s fairly extravagant for twenty or thirty people. And it’ll probably be fewer than twenty people.”

“Okay? I don’t have a very good picture of money. All my life I’ve just sort of earned it way too easily. Like way too easily. Other people struggle but I make the stuff hand over fist.”

“Plus you robbed a mob boss.”

“I did do that.”

“That’s dirty money.”

“What money isn’t dirty money? It’s all filthy. Money is kinda gross when you think about what it really is.”

“I suppose that’s true to a certain extent…”

An Atlas airship swung down into the bay in the mountain. It was a decent sized passenger liner. 

“Is that Ruby’s flight?” I asked Weiss.

“I think so…”

“Do we just wait?” 

“Well you made the sign.”

I shuffled the ‘Ruby Rose’ sign in my hands. I did make the sign. I did. Weiss and I were both in our hunter clothes which for Weiss was that white dress with a blue sash and tassels. She had her blade by her side and the little box containing Ruby’s engagement necklace in it in the palm of one hand. She opened the box and peeked inside. Then she carefully manipulated the locket so its face was just so within the box and closed it again. Then she carefully held it in one hand so the face would still be forward when we presented it to Ruby. She exhaled hard.

“Relax,” I told her helpfully. 

“Thanks for the tip,” she sassed. 

“You’re the one who’s so sure she’ll say ‘yes.’”

“I mean… probably. Right? Why wouldn’t she say ‘yes?’” 

“Don’t trip. This was your idea. Don’t start flaking on me now.”

“You’re right, of course you’re right.”

We spotted Ruby making her way off the airship with her bags and weapon on her back. She was beautiful with wolfish bangs and hair that was red just at the tips. She wore a tight corset that led down to a skirt and tight leggings but the leggings stopped above the knee and skirt only went down to about mid thigh so there was this space of white flesh shown off that was dimpled by the leggings. Her developed chest was pushed up and out by the corset and I think Weiss and I both sighed when we saw her but it could have just been me or it could have just been her. Somebody sighed was the point. At least one of us did. 

It was apparent when Ruby saw us. She jumped excitedly and paced over to us at a rush. As she got closer I was able to make out her eyes. 

Man, if Ruby thought she could just look up at me with those eyes and get whatever she wanted, then she was totally correct.

“You guys!” She ran up and threw her arms around Weiss jostling the box Weiss was holding. Weiss hugged her back and I lowered down the sign I was hefting and grinned as I watched the two of them embrace. Ruby drew back and pressed her lips against Weiss’s and I saw Weiss melt into the kiss with a smile.

“Sweetheart,” I greeted with a grin. 

She drew back and turned to me. I dropped the sign and swung her up into my arms. She wrapped her hands over my shoulders as I easily held her aloft in one arm. Then she grinned and kissed my cheek. She chased that kiss with another one on my lips. My free hand came up to her cheek and cupped it gently while I kissed her back. Then I lowered her and set her to her feet on the ground. 

“You guys! I missed you both so much. And Jaune it’s been a long time. Too long. Way too long. Never do that again!”

“Fair enough. Yeah. Fair cop.”

“Ruby…” Weiss muttered and she glanced at me. I just nodded a little with a small smile. 

Weiss and I got down on our knees. 

“You guys!” 

Weiss opened the box. 

“Ruby Rose, won’t you marry us?” Weiss asked.

“Of course I will! Finally!”

I laughed. Weiss took the necklace out of the box and stepped behind Ruby to put it around her neck.

“How are we doing this?” Ruby asked.

“No idea,” I said.

“He does too.” Weiss waved exasperatedly. “We’re going to pair off for the engagement presents and we’re going to modify one another’s weapons slightly.”

Ruby jumped a little in place.

“It’s so exciting. We need to plan the wedding and we need to invite my family. And Blake and Penny and Oscar and who else do we know?”

“I was going to invite the butler who raised me to walk me down the aisle.”

“I have no one to invite,” I declared. “Well, no one who would be appropriate to invite. Just a crowd of enemies, really. That would be interesting,” I admitted. 

“Ooh this is so exciting. I’m going to be married. Mrs. Arc. Me. And you? Weiss?”

“Me too,” Weiss smiled. “I’ll take his name as well. I’m probably ending my family name but that may be for the best.”

“And kids. How many am I allowed to have? Jaune? Weiss?”

“How about we start with one and see where that takes us…” I trailed. “If - you know, nothing horrific happens, then I don’t know. Less than five. Don’t destroy me, Rubes.”

“Nothing bad will happen. You’ll see, Jaune. Oh my gosh there’s so much to plan. Have we set a date yet? Weiss and I need dresses. And we have to get a cake organized. And what kind of cake do you two want? And instead of little figurines can we have miniature versions of our weapons on top? And where do you want it to be? Where are we going for our honeymoon? What’s our budget look like? Where are we staying? Can we buy a house? Where are we going to raise our babies? Anywhere in the whole world. Where would you two pick? Oh, I suppose we want Jaune to keep his job. So somewhere here or near Vale? Like Patch? Oh we could buy a nice big house out in Patch. Big enough for all the babies and us three. And Jaune can fly. He can really commute without a problem. And it’s such a safe job. The safest he could have gotten. I mean… the sort of missions he could be being sent on by any of the councils or militaries could just be the most dangerous. They only pass you up to harder missions the better you are. It’s such a good job. It pays well enough and he can really stay close to home and not have to travel much. What do you guys think?”

“I agree completely. He should keep his job right here.”

I glanced at Weiss. They both turned to look up at me at the same time. I sighed.

“I have to kill my dad. And I have to butcher my mom. I can’t stay teaching forever and make my family someone else’s problem.”

“Why not?” Ruby asked. “Why can’t we have our lives?”

“Weiss, come on, can you really sit back and do nothing while your family makes a mess out of things?”

“I’m not going to do nothing. But dealing with my family and dealing with yours are two seperate things. Yours is a whole mess of trouble that is never really going to get solved.”

I sighed. I looked down at them. Ruby was looking up at me with those big fucking eyes. Weiss folded her arms and raised an elegant white brow on her scar side. 

I turned away.

“I can’t do nothing. It’s my responsibility. Can you really ask me to not do anything and let more and more people die? It’s a fucking meat grinder out there. My Mother isn’t going to stop. How many other hunters should I let get blended up? I can put a stop to it. I can end this whole cycle of suffering. It’s on me. It falls on me. Ruby… would you really love me if I put it aside for someone else to deal with? If I condemned other people to face her. If I made someone else take my place. Really?” I side eyed her. “Could you really sleep soundly beside me each night knowing what I let other people face in my stead?”

When one of us looked away it wasn’t me. 

“...no…it’s what makes you a hero,” she muttered and she eyeballed Weiss. Weiss let her arms droop and sighed despairingly. “But we can have both. We can beat Salem. But we can also live our lives. I really believe that we can. I do expect you to face your mother. But not today, this week, this month, or even this year.”

“My father has to be stopped. That’s next on my agenda.”

“Marrying us should be next on your agenda,” Weiss cut in.

“I thought that was first?” I asked. “You have my accounts. You have my schedule. Just ask me. I’m yours. For this year I belong to you. But I also belong to the world. It falls on me to slice up my Mother and put an end to this train of human suffering. And humanity will grow and blossom without her withering influence. Maybe the sort of world peace the gods expect from us will happen one day and Oscar will be able to unite the world. But it comes down on me. I’m the one with the power to face my Mother and I’m growing weaker now. I was getting stronger but recently I’ve been faltering more and more. The more time I waste the more other people get hurt and my chances of success fall too. If I’m not at my best she will destroy me. Like a bug on a windshield. She won’t even need to use my sisters against me but she can. My best chance to take her down is right now.” I pointed at the ground to emphasize my point. 

“But I’m asking you to wait. We’re asking you to wait,” Ruby informed me. “Wait. It’ll be okay. Live with us.”

I breathed deeply. I… I couldn’t say ‘no’ to her. Not really. Never could. Maybe that was a weakness of mine. If I could look at her and tell her ‘no’ and start flying in my Mother’s direction I could end this today. I could still feel her out there on the edge of my thoughts. She hung like a piano over my head ready to crash down on me.  

“Fine. Yes. Sure,” I bit out. “But one day you’ll have to let me go to her…”

“We will,” Weiss whispered. “We’ll let you go.”

“We’ll release you. We will.”

“I’ll die,” I warned. “She’ll kill me,” I said without emotion. 

They said nothing. They looked between each other but I marched forward. 

“I might get her but she will get me. And if she doesn’t, then my sisters will. You have to let me go anyway. You have to let me go knowing that.”

“Jaune…” Weiss trailed. “You don’t know that.”

“Yeah. I do. And you do too,” I said. 

Weiss frowned but didn’t have a ready retort. 

“All the more reason to spend some time with us,” Ruby pressed. “Don’t you think? Just a little more time together…”

“It will never be enough, though. You have to see that. You’re always going to want more. You’re going to want even more time. No matter how much I give you it will never be enough and you’ll never be satisfied.”

“Let us have this at least,” Weiss demanded. “Don’t start leaving us now. We only just got all together. There’s no need for this. We don’t want you to go now. We want you to be with us now. All of you. Your mind and your body and your soul. Don’t start straying from us the moment we’re finally one again. Let us have this moment. Ruby just said yes to us. What more do you want? Why do you have to undermine it? Just be with us.”

“Let me have this moment,” Ruby pleaded. “This moment with you and Weiss when we’re all engaged. Let me have the moment where I see your face as I walk down the aisle. Let me have the moment where we hold our babies in our arms. I’ll let you go. I will.”

“You know that I will too…” Weiss murmured. “I can’t hold you back from your destiny. And I believe you have the power to stop Salem. I won’t stay your hand. But you have to be with us the rest of the time. You can’t be pulled apart by your worries. You need to really be with us. Not partially but all the way.”

“I can’t do that either. She lingers like a curse on me. I’ll always have to look over my shoulder… but I can give you the rest,” I promised. “And if nothing horrible happens I’ll give you as many kids as you want. Well, not as many. But quite a few. No more than I have fingers for.”

“You always have to tag with that, don’t you?” Weiss leveraged. “Something ‘horrible.’ They’re our babies. Let’s be optimistic.”

“We still don’t know if I’m not using an empty revolver.”

“Please. Little Jaune is a rifle,” Ruby cut me off. “Call a spade a spade, at least.”

“Um. Anyways,” I shrugged that ego boost off as well as I was able. And I was pretty good at it. Not gonna lie. “We tried for a month straight and nothing happened. And I’m probably the issue. Not you, Weiss. You’re young and healthy.”

“And you’re not?” Weiss continued. 

“You know I’m not. I’m old for my age.”

“Five or four,” Weiss informed me. 

“Yeah. Five,” I agreed. It really was so young. So many people got so many years. Even in our hellish world. They got to grow up. They got to live. They got to grow old. They got to die. 

I was cutting to the chase. I didn’t get to grow up. I got grown. And if I wasn’t careful I wouldn’t get to do much living as I aged rapidly. I would definitely die. All people did. All people should. Everyone got that privilege. Except for my Mother. She always had to be the exception to the rule. My Mother… my fucking Mother.

The eternal bitch. 

I sighed heavily. 

“I’m only five. I should be worried about kindergarten. And the cutest girls in class. And trying to make my parents proud. Not… not having kids, or wives, or saving the world from that alien. I’m matricidal and patricidal. And I’ll be sororicidal too. I don’t want to kill my sisters but I will. So it counts.”

“You always stack the deck against yourself,” Weiss dismissed. “You always have. You can’t see the good parts of who you are and what you do. It’s not like you asked for your family to be evil. And you take it on yourself to solve it. That’s what a hero would do.”

“You can’t see that you’re a hero. You’re blind to yourself,” Ruby pointed. “We’re going to work on that.”

“We have time, Jaune. You’ll see. You’ll have all the time you need to become a good father and a good husband before you save the world and come back to us. And you’ll see that having kids is easier than you think.”

“I… I doubt it. I bet having kids and doing a good job is hard as fuck.”

“I told you to work on your language. Start with that. We probably have just been getting unlucky but we’ll get it right. If we need to, we’ll get tested. There’s always medical programs to assist with pregnancies if we really need them. You worry far more than is healthy. I do too, I can admit that. But we have Ruby now. All together we really can figure this out. There’s nothing we can’t do. I know you don’t always feel that way. So we’ll just have to show you. We’ll show you what you’re really capable of.”

pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq pq

-WG

[r3b3lgrrrrrrrl]

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 110) "Charming... Isn't He?"

@crystalbaby12 @backoftheroomandnotbelonging @5sosfam1dlover @rosefilledhearts-blog

Luna uncharacteristically wakes up before Colson or her alarm. She lays silently as she listens to him breathe, wishing she didn't have to leave. She doesn't know what time it is, only that they went to bed well after 6A and that she has a flight out of Hopkins International at 10A. Not wanting to disturb him, her fingers nervously run along the tiny padlocks chain that lays around her neck as she continues listening to him. Finding a calm comfort in his deep, repetitive breathes.

"Why are you even going?" She questions herself. "Because Jax told you when he married Tara... Yeeeeah, but he didn't tell you when he started fucking her." Her brain argues their history with itself. "It's the right thing to do, Loons... You know you're gonna catch shit if they hear about it from anyone else before you." Luna let's out a deep, frustrated sigh.

"Hey... You're awake?" Colson's groggy voice asks as he reaches for her.

"Yeah... I'm sorry. Did I wake you?" Luna asks as she snuggles into him.

"Nah... I've been awake on and off. Too much Adderall yesterday." He answers as he takes in her unique smell of coconut oil, weed, Euphoria and their sex.

"Aww, Bunny... You want a couple Xanax to even you out today?" She asks.

"Ahhhh... Maybe. What I really want right now is you." He grins as he pulls her chin up to kiss her mouth.

"Mmmm..." Luna moans through their kisses as she climbs on top of him.

Colson's rock solid as Luna works him into her. Taking her time as she pushes each huge inch further inside of herself. He stretches out in pleasure as he holds her hips steady. Bowing down to kiss him, her soft hair tickles his face as she slowly slides up and down on his cock. Rolling her hips in circular motions while making him press against her unknowing organs.

"Ohh fuck, I love your pussy." Colson breathes out as he flips her onto her back.

Throwing her legs over his shoulders, he climbs back inside of her. Making her moan loudly from his girth as he sucks on her neck. Pushing her hips up, she matches his momentum.

"Who's girl are you?" He demands as he bites on her ear.

"Oooh shit, Col. Yours. Fuck! I'm fucking yours!!" Luna cries out as he makes them both cum at the same time.

Luna drops her legs as Colson buries his face in the pillow next to her head. Keeping his dick warm inside it's Home. After catching their breath, he kisses her cheek before rolling over. Propping himself up on his elbow, he brushes away the stray pieces of hair from her face.

"You're coming home to me tonight, right?" He asks quietly as he gazes down at her.

"Of course, Bunny. I'm all in. With YOU. No one else." She reassures him as she leans up and pulls him in closer for a promising kiss. "I got something for you." Her blue eyes dance for him in the morning sun before she springs out of the bed.

"What the fuck did you do now?" He asks with an amused chortle.

"You'll have to see..." She gives him an earnest smile as she pulls a large white box out of the closet and sets it on his lap.

"Seriously!?!" Colson exclaims as his eyes almost bug out of his face when he lifts his gift up.

Inside the box is a beautiful, red, leather duffel bag. 5:3666 blazes out from it's side in a gleaming white. Diablo popping out on it's own from the shoulder strap pad.

"It's a fucking Balenciaga!! How the FUCK did you do this?" He asks in delighted amazement.

"I called in a favor. Demna made it especially for you after hearing Hotel Diablo." She smiles sweetly at him.

"You played him my fucking album??" He asks wildly.

"Well, no. I didn't play it for him personally but I sent him a copy. He'd asked for it in order to design the piece." Luna shrugs. "He fucking loved it by the way." She gives Colson that One Look that had solidified his love for her not even 3mnths ago.

"How the hell did I get so lucky with you?" He questions no one in particular as he pulls her naked body onto his.

They're in the middle of making out to his Thank Yous when Luna's alarm goes off. Colson whines for her to ignore it but she coaxes him to join her for a ShowerFuck instead. He obliges, learning early on in their relationship, it's better to fuck Luna out of town instead of fight her out of it.

------------------------------------------------

After their ShowerFuck, a few joints, a line of Adderall and three 30s, Luna heads downstairs dressed in black skinny jeans, a black printed tank, Docs and her usual jewelry. Colson and her carry on in tow. They find Ashley, Dom, Bullet and Skies roaming around the kitchen. They're flying out too but on a later flight to LA while Luna's headed to Stockton. It's a little under a 5hr flight, putting her in Charming around 330/4Pish.

"Alright, I'm outta here." Luna says once she gets the alert for her Uber. "I love you." She tells Colson with a kiss after exchanging GoodByes and Love with everyone else.

Colson slaps, grabs and holds onto Luna's ass cheek as he walks her out of the house to her waiting ride, shutting her door, he leans in for one more kiss, leaving an "I love you too." lingering on her lips.

Watching her Uber pull out of the driveway his heart starts to ache for her immediately. "She'll be back, Kells. She always comes back." He tries to convince himself, knowing it's true as he heads inside to post his gratitude to IG.

××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××

"When your girl's got amazing style AND gnarly connects you get sweet custom gear. Thank you @balenciaga Not only am I honored that you listened to my album but I'm humbled and LOVE your interpretation!🙏🏽 Time to celebrate #hoteldiablo with this FRESH shit Letsssss gooooo Fam! 🏁😈🍾🖤"

××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××××

"Yo... You doin' anything today?" Colson asks Pete when he finds him in the kitchen with Trippie and the others that are awake.

"Nutten'. I was gonna stick around here until Monday or so if you don't care." Pete answers. "Where's Loons?" He asks, looking around for Colson's second appendage.

"She has some personal businesses to handle..." He quickly brushes him off, not wanting to talk about it. "Feel like shootin' a video? I got that Pop Up shop with Case but after that I'm tryin' to kick out a jawn for Candy." He looks between Pete and Trippie.

"Fuck yeah, man. Like Loco?" Pete asks with a smirk.

"Somethin' like that." Colson laughs. "You in, Trip?" He goes on to ask.

"One." Trippie nods as he lifts his hungover head and index finger up off of the counter.

"Word. You trying to ride to this Pop Up?" He asks to Pete's head shake. "Fuck you then... I'M OUT, BITCH!" Colson exclaims to everyone else's head pounding groans.

------------------------------------------------

Luna lands and rents a car, making sure to Snap Colson on her way to Charming. It's a little over a half an hour from the airport. She makes it to Teller-Marrow Automotive before 4P.

"BATTON DOWN THE HATCHES!! TROUBLE'S HOME!" Gemma declares with a wide grin as she slams her hand down on the old Chevy next to her at the sight of Luna.

"Hey, Gems." Luna can't help but smile as she's engulfed in the Mama Bear's hug.

------------------------------------------------

✴️Patti Smith and Gemma Teller-Marrow can not stand each other. Never could. Oddly enough, the old Biker Matriarch has a huge soft spot for the older Punk's granddaughter. Knowing Luna since she was a little kid, she's one of the few who are fully aware of the intimacy Luna shares with her son. Always preferring her over any other female Jackson has ever interacted with. Gemma's the real reason Luna came to Charming personally. The young rebel having a deep love for her and being wise enough to know what bridges to burn and which to not even dare to bring a spark around.✴️

------------------------------------------------

"What are you doin' here, Sweetie? Jax know you're comen'?" Gemma has a zillion questions.

"Yeeeah..." Luna says sheepishly as she looks down. "He knows."

"What's goin' on?" Gemma's tone changes as she props her hand on her hip.

"I'm getting married." Luna answers lowly as she holds out her hand to display the huge ruby that claims her soul.

Gemma's quiet as she takes Luna's hand and admires the gleaming ring. Luna's heart can't help but sink as she feels Gemma's disappointment. She can feel it all as the mother's hopes and dreams of Luna and Jackson's future together evaporate into the thick, California air around them.

"Serves him right for even getting involved with that cunt to begin with." Gemma coldly states before softly looking into Luna's eyes while still holding her hand. "You sure about this?" She asks as she obnoxiously flicks her manicured nail onto the brilliant stone, slightly embarrassing Luna by it's size as she gives a firm nod. "You're happy? He knows the deal and treats you right?" She asks with a gentle assertiveness to her questions.

"Yes. He's wonderful." Luna smiles dreamily.

"Good... Because you know what'll happen otherwise." She says with a deadly smirk. "You're staying for dinner, right?" Gemma doesn't ask as she throws her arm around Luna's shoulders.

"Yeah..." Luna nods again as she silently curses her life.

Pulling out her phone, Luna switches her flight from 6P to the next one at 10P. She's torn. Knowing that Colson's gonna be pissed while also knowing well enough to never decline an invitation to Family Dinner from Gemma Teller-Marrow.

"BOYS!!! BABY GATOR'S HOME FOR DINNER!!" Gemma shouts as she leads Luna inside the garage, making her cringe at the old nickname.

------------------------------------------------

Colson is in the Prospect East section of Cleveland when he catches Luna's Snap. The sight of her name on his screen makes his heart pound before he even clicks View.

"Fuuuuuuuck me." He smiles to himself at the sight of her, grinning wider at her words. His heart feels a slight ease for the first time since he shut the car door beside her. "She's YOURS." He reminds himself before Casie pulls on him.

"Dad. I don't wanna just stand here." His daughter complains.

"Okay, Peanut..." He answers as he focuses on his surroundings. "Wanna ring people up?" He asks as he narrows in on the cash register.

"Can I?" Casie asks with bright eyed enthusiasm.

"Yeah, Nut. Who else would I trust with our money?" He laughs as he leads her over to the register.

Colson proceeds to walk the floor. Interacting with excited fans as he helps them choose the perfect Hotel Diablo pieces to represent them personally. Taking pictures, signing fresh mech, chatting and answering thousands of questions. Appreciating more than anything the intense, intimate relationship he has with his fans.

"This is what it's all about." He thinks to himself as he graciously walks amongst his supporters.

Daaad..." Casie calls for him again.

"What's up, Kiddo?" He asks as he approaches her.

"I have my camera for a reason. Looney would be taking pictures if she was here. Not money." The not so little girl challenges her father.

"You're right..." He laughs as he extends his hand out to Casie.

Following her dad around, she grabs perfect, intimate shots of the fans inside the one time store. Having a natural eye, she knows what's genuine and what's bullshit. Wandering outside behind Colson, she continues to shoot what she finds interesting. Trying to grab a great shot, her camera jams.

"DAAAD!!!!" Casie hollers in a panic.

"It won't work!" She says with a frustrated tone as she smacks the back of Colson's arm to get his attention.

Colson bends down to help her. He has no clue what to do as Casie thrusts the camera up at him like he has ALL the answers. Making him silently hate Luna for leaving .

"Peanut, I don't know what I'm doing..." Colson admits with hesitation.

"Call Looney." His daughter demands out of frustration.

Leaning heavily over him, the driven girl makes sure he does what she says. Watching his fingers move around the flat screen until she sees Luna's face pop up.

"Call her." Casie demands again.

"OKAY." Colson chuckles at her demeanor as he hits call and kicks it on to speaker phone.

It rings through to both of their dismay. Pushing any bullshit out off his mind, Casie's dad suggest they Snap Luna. Pulling her in close for a selfie, they send their girl a simple message. Walking around again, Colson tries not to let his insecurities bug him... But we're all only human.

------------------------------------------------

It's not even 5P and The Clubhouse is in full celebration from Luna's unexpected arrival. Tig gripping her up for an over exaggerated Welcome and spin around. Once her feet are back on the floor, she takes a few shots with Bobby before coming around the bar to hug him while still bullshitting and filling him in on her and her grandmother's well being. Juice comes equipped with another huge hug and a joint for Luna as he also grabs a beer and another round of Welcome Home shots.

"EYYYE!! The wee one has returned!" Chibbs shouts as he embraces Luna. "Why the tattoos on your beautiful face though, Love?" He questions her as he holds her cheekbones carefully in between his weather beaten hands after their own Welcome.

"You sayen' I'm ugly, Chibby?" Luna gives him a playful half smile.

"A soul like yours could neva be ugly, My Dear." He reassures her with his heavy accent. "But... You're much prettier without... In my opinion." The old Irishman kindly whispers into her ear as he hugs her again.

Piney can barley breathe at the sight of Luna. It's been a couple years and a lot of tattoos since he last saw her. Sitting on his large lap, she wraps her arms around him for a soul swallowing bear hug and sweet nuzzle.

"Why you here, Kid? I know Patti doesn't want you around Gemma's toxic bullshit." Piney asks her directly, never one to fuck around.

"I'm getting married..." Luna says quietly. "And I wanted to tell Jax personally." She explains as she lightly drops her engaged finger onto her lap for him to see.

"You've always been a good one." Piney says as he takes in a deep breath off of his oxygen tank, knowing all too well the relationship between Jackson and Luna. Looking down at the ring, he's unimpressed. "He's a good one too?" He asks as his tone drops. "Not a junkie like the other?" The old vet holds no punches with his questions. "You know you don't need money or protection, Luna. You need loyalty and soul." The old man firmly advises her.

"No. I know... And he's good." Luna answers as she kisses the top of Piney's balding head. "I wouldn't be here if he wasn't." In her soul, she doesn't believe that she's giving off half truths to one of her grandmother's oldest friends.

"You know what'll happen if not." Piney says firmly, coughing at the idea.

"Let her go, Pop." Opie interupts them to Luna's appreciation. "We're not 15yrs old anymore." He sighs out as he takes Luna's hand and she rises from his dad's lap.

"Don't let him fool you, I'll always be 15." Luna beams at the old man as she kisses his still observing cheek.

"You're such a fucking kiss ass." Opie calls her out as they walk away.

"Fuuuck you. I love your dad, Asshole." Luna laughs as they head towards the bar. "Where's Jax?" She asks as some random girl hands them bottles of Budweiser. "Seriously? We haven't moved up in taste?" She cocks her lip at Opie as she takes a swig of the grossness in her hand.

"Some thing's never change." He shrugs as he guzzles America's beer.

"I guess... Maybe it's the acholic in me that'll take the 8.5% over some bullshit 4..." Luna smirks as she eyes Opie and swigs her own.

"You're such an Asshole." He looks over at her with a half grin as he finishes his water that's called beer.

"Yes." Luna nods her head laughing. "That's never gonna change either, Bro." She states as she kisses the side of his burly arm.

"So, why are you here?" Opie finally cuts through the shit, much like his father.

"Honestly?" Luna sighs.

------------------------------------------------

✴️ Luna and Opie's relationship goes far beyond friendship. It's so deep that they consider each other brother and sister without hesitation. Luna appreciating him in the same glorious light that she holds for the other three men in her life that she calls her Brothers. Jackson being the only hem in their thick lining. Considering himself a brother to both Luna and Jackson, the months leading up to the summer of '08, when had Luna came home to Tara, sent Opie into an anxiety induced spiral. Making him withdrawal from Jax just when he needed him the most. Forcing Jackson to grip tighter onto Tara as an anchor in the swirling world of the aftermath of his father's death the previous summer. Watching their connection grow was frustrating, confusing and upsetting to Opie. Only to make him angry when an unknowing Luna came back home 4mnths later to be shocked and heartbroken by the new, unexpected relationship. It had always been Luna and Opie, since that first summer when she turned 8yrs old. Jackson had tagged along but Luna had lived in the cabin with Piney and Opie for eight summers. Sharing bunkbeds and joints. Fears and secrets. Trusting every ounce of one another as they grew up in each other's hands. Opie and Luna had spent the Summer of '08 together, just the two of them. Riding, surfing, partying at Smurf's and all over The Coast while causing immense destruction with their uncontrollable souls and broken hearts. Both pissed in the silent knowing that it was the last summer that Luna would spend in Charming because of Jackson's choices and actions. It never hindered their relationship though. Luna coming back home for not only Opie and Donna's small wedding, the birth of both her niece and nephew but also their birthdays every year until Luna's mourning sabbatical.✴️

-------------------------------------------------

"I'm getting married." Luna says softly as she looks into Opie's eyes. "I wanted to tell Jax personally so....." Her voice trails as she looks away.

"To the Cleveland guy you've got that song with?" Opie asks honestly, trying to connect the dots.

"Yeah... His name is Colson." Luna answers with a nod as she swigs her weak ass beer. "Can I get something stronger, please?" She asks as she throws her hands up in frustration.

"You just met him, didn't you?" Opie questions her.

"Technically... Yes. But ACTUALLY no." Luna answers as she reaches for the double shot of Jack that the bartender has so kindly placed on the bar for her. "I kinda ran into him YEARS ago when I was first with Justin.... Then we caught back up annnnnnnnd....." Luna shrugs her shoulders as she takes a smooth sip of her actual acholic beverage. "Shit happens."

"Shit always happens with you, Loons." Opie laughs as he shakes his head. "When do I get to meet him? Am I invited to the wedding? You know I gotta put that reaper fear in his heart beforehand. That's MY JO..."

"Who needs to fear The Reaper? Where we spreadin' that shit?" Jackson asks as he walks up on to Opie and Luna. Tossing his arms over their shoulders, his kisses Luna's cheek with an easy "What's up, Baby Gator?"

"Hey..." Luna greets him as she uncomfortably wiggles out from under him and shoots Opie an Eye. "Uhhhmmm... You got a minute?" Luna asks Jackson with a hesitation in her voice.

"Yeah, let's take a ride." He answers nonchalantly as he grabs Luna's hand and pulls her through The ClubHouse.

Clay sits watching as they disappear. He's the only person Luna avoided greeting personally. She's doesn't like him but she's not rude to him out of respect and fear of Gemma. Not the patch. Luna's one of the very few in The World who doesn't fear The Reaper. ONLY Gemma.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Uhhhmm... Do you still have my bike?" She asks as they hit the garage door.

"REALLY?" Jackson turns to her with a tone of annoyance.

"I built that fucker from the ground up!! If it's live, I wanna ride that shit!" Luna exclaims.

"Relax!" Jackson counters with a laugh at her stubbornness, thinking he's falling a bit more in love with her but it's only the nostalgia of The Bike and Luna's presence mixed together.

------------------------------------------------

✴️ Luna, Jackson and Opie had started the rebuild in '05, just before Luna had turned 13yrs old. Luna insisting they put it on hold while she was gone. Piney had kept it oiled throughout the winter, Luna making him proud when she came back the following summer and finished it up. It's the same bike Jackson had taught her how to ride on. The same summer he showed her how to handle multiple kinds of guns. It was also the same summer she had popped her cherry with him and reunited with The Cody Boys. Looking back, there's no doubt that the Summer of 2005 changed the course of Luna's life. Easily, on a shining morning filled with water and sand. It's also the same bike she went wild on in the Summer of '08 with Opie. It's HER bike. SHE built it, SHE learned on it and SHE confirmed her independence with it. In the dark, without even Opie. Rolling down the PCH on too many nights to count. Alone✴️

--------------------------------------------------

"You're in luck... The Old Man loves you." Jackson flashes his charming grin at her as he pulls the cover off of her bike.

"Oh, shit!! Really!?!" She laughs with a huge smile as Jackson rolls her baby out. "I can't believe it, Dude!" She exclaims as she runs her hands over the sleek white and baby blue colored metal.

"Get on..." He encourages her as she easily swings her leg over and settles comfortably onto the worn out seat that cups her ass. "You look good." He smirks with his blue eyes teasing her. "Let's ride."

"Alright, gimme a minute. Grab yours, I'll be out in a sec." Luna says as she pulls her phone out of her back pocket.

Luna knows she needs to call Colson about her flight change. Clicking her phone on there's a Snap from him.

"I have to pee..." Luna says as she jumps off of her bike and heads back into The ClubHouse towards the bathroom leaving a clueless Jackson behind.

"Oooohh.... I love them." Luna's heart giggles as her face splits into a huge smile at Colson's maniacal look and Casie's sweet face.

She calls them but it rings through to her slight irritation. It seems like they can never catch each other when they're apart. Shooting a Snap, she heads back into the garage. Climbing onto her bike, she wheels it out towards Jackson. Catching his eye as she rolls up next to him.

"One of the better investments I've made in my life." He nods with a cool smile, Luna not knowing whether he's talking about the bike or her.

"You ready?" She asks with an unamused tone.

Jackson's smile and the roar of his bike indicates that, Yes, he's Ready To Go. He can't help but watch as Luna fires her own up with ease. His dick growing hard as he watches her face fall into a smile of content as it's familiar rumble rattles deep into her bones. He always thought she was at her best with a bike between her legs and a Glock in her hand.

------------------------------------------------

Colson gets Luna's Snap as he's heading into the house to grab Pete. They're supposed to meet Trippie DownTown at a specific location they have blocked off. Casie pushes passed him as he checks it.

"10P... What the fuck is 10P??" Colson's brain immediately freaks out. Calling Luna, she doesn't answer. "I will fucking kill them....." He starts to spin out. "She said she'd be back tonight... A 10P flight is NOT tonight." Colson's throat starts to close as he becomes angrier.

"What's goin' on, Buddy?" Pete asks as he comes up to Colson.

"She's with fucking Jackson and her flight isn't until 10 fucking PM." Colson unloads without thinking.

"Loons?" Pete asks slightly confused but more to confirm.

"Yeah, fucking Loons." Colson snaps back.

"Alright, chill out..." Pete says as he puts his hands up. "It's not the end of The World... This Jackson Guy, I've met him. Yeah, he's blonde and hot like you but he rides a motorcycle... What are they gonna do on a motorcycle?" Pete asks, thinking he's helping.

"Uh, I don't know... Wrap her fucking legs and body around him!?!" Colson shouts.

"But it's from the back... She can't stick her baby maker into his ass... It doesn't work that way." Pete says as he throws his hands up again with his logic.

"Just shut the fuck up..." Colson growls at him in aggravation.

"Ahhh, C'mon... You REALLY think Loons is gonna pull some shit on you?" Pete says as he gives him a You're Fucking Stupid look.

"Wouldn't be there first time." Colson mutters.

"What?" Pete cocks his head towards Colson quickly. "Nah... You two are inseparable. She ain't like that either... So... What the fuck are you tawken' bout?" His Stanton Island accent immediately kicking in.

"Nothen'... I'm just buggen' let's go grab Trip..." Colson tries to change the conversation and push Pete out the door.

Pete starts again "Nah, man... What th..."

"DAD. Are you ready?" Casie comes into the kitchen, looking at him and Pete.

"Yeah... C'mon, we out." Colson shoots Pete an Eye before grabbing his new bag.

"This ain't over." Pete says sternly once him and Colson are shoulder to shoulder and out of Casie's ear shot.

--------------------------------------------------

"Here? REALLY...?" Luna sighs as she straddles her bike between her legs before kicking it onto it's stand so she can sit. "Why would you bring us here?" She asks as she plays with her hands.

"Why wouldn't I?" Jackson counters with his snide blue eyes sparkling in the low afternoon sun.

"I fucking hate him so much." Luna's insides rage.

"You know, don't you." Luna's question stopping all of his games in their tracks.

"Know what?" He asks coyly as he skips a rock out into the open road ahead of them.

"For real?" She asks with disbelief as she climbs off of her bike.

"Say it." Jackson turns, making their eyes meet. "Say it." He repeats himself as the hints of green spark out of his deep blue eyes from the emotions he's trying to hide.

"I'm getting married, Jackson." Luna huffs out, with an annoyance she truly didn't want while more than their eyes connect.

"Alright... Fine. But, until then c'mon." Jackson grins as he pulls Luna down the hill.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"That's RIGHT!! We'd convinced Unser that Donaldson was blind and had no idea how many Reese's he was buying or not buying!!" Jackson laughs deeply.

Luna's sitting with Jackson on the rocks by the ocean. They're close to the spot where they had shared their first kiss. Now, almost 15yrs later, they only share joints and old stories. The water giving off an intense energy as it rocks, waves and pushes against the shoreline aggressively. Grabbing her hand, Jackson studies the expensive piece that sits on her finger.

"The girl I knew would've never wore anything like this." He says lowly.

"The girl you KNEW... Was a CHILD." Luna scoffs as she pulls her hand away angrily from his truth.

Sitting silently, there's too many unspoken words between the two of them. Heartbreaks that burned too deep. Promises that broke too hard. Along with unforgiven Sorry's and long remaining regrets.

"You know it's because of you, right... You're unhappy..." Jackson states flatly as he looks into the swirling waters.

"What?" Luna asks as she cocks her head towards him.

"The water rages with the moon... And YOU are named after The Moon... LUNA." Jackson looks over at her as he licks his lips with a satisfied smile. "You're gonna tell me you're happy?" He half asks as he slides his hand across her jawbone.

Jackson presses his mouth against Luna's. Pushing his wet, firm tongue into her mouth. For a second they connect like synergy, Luna easily falling into his hold like she had in her grandmother's penthouse. Jackson taking full advantage of her weakness for him as his hands grasp the face of the girl that he's missed for so many years.

"You're not mine." Luna quickly pushes him off of her with a stoned slur and a shake of her head, recognizing that the familiarity of his mouth is not HER familiar mouth. "We've gotta get to dinner." Luna states as she stands up and brushes the sand off of her ass and hands before making her way up the hill.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

"Tell me THIS is what you want." Jackson says as he grabs Luna's left wrist and pulls her closer to him with his other hand by the small of her back.

"What? THIS like US? Or like, THIS as in me and Colson and the multiple rings, tattoos and other items I rock on my body for him?" Luna asks with a scowl. "I don't know where you got confused... But, the last time I saw you, I had a boyfriend. We got engaged... Annnnnnnnd from what I gather..." Luna sighs and rolls her eyes. "It's a pretty big fucking deal to The World, so I flew the fuck down HERE to tell you in person instead of letting you find out on the Internet or some other shit... Which apparently you already DID, so it doesn't fucking matter. Shit, Jax... I thought I was doing the right thing here. Obviously fucking not." Luna huffs with annoyance as she fishes a Newport out of her bag.

"I didn't think it would last. And it's fast as shit..." Jackson shrugs. "I don't know... Maybe I thought you'd float around for once...?"

"Float around...? What the fuck do you mean Float Around?" Luna pulls on her Newport hard before exhaling a large cloud of offended smoke.

"I don't know... Like date diff..." He doesn't even get to finish his sentence.

"What!?!" She cuts him off. "No. Why would you think that?? Justin fucking KILLED himself, Jackson. He didn't just fucking break up with me one day and move out. HE LEFT HIMSELF HANGING IN OUR FUCKING BEDROOM AND ME WITH OUR WHOLE FUCKING LIFE!" Luna's screaming as tears pour down her face. "I stayed single because I HAD TO. I didn't want to Float AROUND because I couldn't even STAND THE IDEA OF ANYONE FUCKING TOUCHING ME!!" Luna's hands are flying like annoyed hummingbirds as she continues to scream at Jackson. "FUUUUUCK!!! I even tried again with you. I don't know why it didn't click. I can't help that and I'm sorry. But in all honesty, I was lucky enough to run back into someone that I have a CRAZY connection to without even speaking... And you know what? Considering that it's been more then 10yrs since YOU CHEATED ON ME, you can go fuck yourself. I don't owe you shit when it comes to explaining our relationships to each other. This was a FUCKING courtesy and I'm goin' to fuckin' dinner." Luna takes another long drag off of her 100 before flicking it so that it purposely zips just past Jackson.

Stalking away, she climbs on to her bike. Shooting him a nasty eye, she fires it up and is off without a second thought.

---------------------------------------------------

"Fuuuuuuuck.... That did not go how I wanted... She's lying to herself about the click. I know she felt it just now and in New York.... If she marries him, I'm gonna lose her forever. Justin was a fucking fluke. There's no way she'd pick two dumbasses in a row." Jackson weighs the odds as he climbs on his bike and follows behind Luna.

------------------------------------------------

Colson is walking around DownTown Cleveland with Casie, Pete, Trippie, AJ and their friend Miles. Infiltrating the streets and fucking with the youth culture. They only get to bang because they're legit hometown Assholes. Anyone else would've been dirted. Easily. With a camera presented, the tiny hard asses easily engage once they recognize Pete and The Ohio Natives. Miles and AJ catching a load of footage of a ton of different kids. BECAUSE WE'RE ALL DIFFERENT.

Dressed in pink, with a long suit jacket, Colson takes his place on the sidewalk as Miles shoots him. Using the pharmacy they rented and blocked off, they shoot the rest of the video in and around it. Using Colson, Trippie, Pete and the kids that the parent's signed off on it. AJ's loose footage being used during editing.

Colson, Pete and Trippie gather for a pic. Colson copies and Snaps it to Luna before they begin to celebrate their success. After a while, Colson annoyance takes over. He hasn't spoken to Luna all day, other than Snaps. Colson collects his stuff and Casie with frustration. She skips alongside him asking about Luna as he grips his bag. It only makes his annoyance grow.

"When's she coming home?" Casie asks as she bounces alongside her father.

"I don't know." Colson answers as his jaw clenches and everything inside of him RAGES. "C'mon Peanut. We goin' home." He keeps his calm as he grabs his daughter's hand.

------------------------------------------------

"He fed the dog fucking METH!!" Tig bellows as they pass the salad around.

"You said to get him high... So, I did!" Juice shrugs with a laugh.

"He bit my FUCKING ass!" Tig exclaims as he's about to drop his pants as evidence.

"We believe you, Baby." Gemma coaxes him as she tugs his pants up. "We gotta special dinner... Our Girl's Home!" She exclaims with pride. "Come. Eat."

Gemma's dinner table is like no other. She knows what grounds she owns, along with anything else as she smokes her brisket. There are men that run things and then there's Gemma. Don't ever be foolish to mistake the two.

"Holy FUUUUCK..." Bobby moans as he bites into his sandwich.

With everyone gathered together, it's Gemma, Luna, Jax, the rest of The Club alongside Donna and the kids. They enjoy Gemma's cooking along with their commentary. Balls are busted and throat's are jokingly cut. Stories being happily exchanged. Including the job where Luna took the solid bullet through her shoulder. Now notoriously known amongst the family as The Hit. Too many opinions and thoughts being passed on that subject, they roll on. The table continues to flow, talking of upcoming community family events as more jokes are tossed around. It's the mention of Luna's engagement that stops everyone.

"WHAT?" Gemma questions their silence. "He fucked up..." She shrugs as she sips her cocktail, her stomach having no need for food. "We gonna act like he didn't?" She challenges not only Luna and Jackson but also Piney and Opie. "He FUCKING had her... And he fucked up."

"Yeah, Ma. I did. But I was fucked up when I when I lost her... Dad had just died... You and Clay were..."

"Me and Clay were fucking WHAT?' Gemma demands from her son.

"Nothing." Jackson sighs in frustration, knowing to not cross his mother.

------------------------------------------------

Standing outside after finishing up dinner, Luna and Opie are sharing a joint. Luna can't help but be relieved of not feeling the obligation to inform anyone else personally regarding her marriage plans.

"Look, I'm getting married for real in Cleveland. I think it's the 29th but don't quote me." Luna swallows hard as she looks at the nonsense around them. "I never wanted this spectical... But I'd love for you and Donna to be there. Piney too if he can... If you can't, I'm doing it again at Colson's Annual Festival like a week later for friends... It could be fun..." Her hopefulness trailing off before sighing as she laces her fingers inside Opie's. "I just wanna be me and him." Luna thinks of Colson wistfully as she grips Opie's hand. "Can't I have just him...? I know he wants the same thing." Luna shrugs. "So what's the fucking problem?" She asks.

"Gemma." Opie states.

"That's not fair....." Luna trails.

"Nothing in this life is fair, Luna. You haven't learned that yet?" Opie counters her with the awful truth.

"Hey..." Jackson calls out as he cautiously approaches them.

"Hey." Luna and Opie answer in unison.

"I need to talk to Luna alone..." Jackson trails.

A simple look between Op and Luna gives him the sense of space. He loves Jackson. The way a man should love his bestfriend. He also loves Luna. Feeling more inclined to protect her first, he walks away with a slight hesitation as he leaves them alone.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Jackson and Luna have been outside for the last 20mins. Beginning as an apology from Jackson, they had slipped naturally into their uniquely intimate history. Leading Jackson to ask Luna again if it's Colson that she truly wants. Her answer being a firm Yes. Followed by her interpretation of their painful, heart staking truth.

"Nothing will ever compare to Us... You are who I began with. Nothing will ever be the things we were or did together.... Or that I learned with you." Heavy tears are dropping from Luna's eyes as her breath shudders. "You're my first... For A LOT of Things... If not EVERYTHING." Luna gasps at their memories. "And I will always love you... But you're not mine anymore." She whimpers lowly. "You haven't been for a long time because you made that choice. Years ago, Jax. Not me." She sniffles as she pulls Jackson's face into hers, kissing him hard on the mouth before getting into her rental and shutting the door.

Jackson knocks on her window as Luna shakes her head. Putting the car in reverse, she disappears down the driveway without saying GoodBye to anyone else. Rolling out of his sight, for who knows how long this time.

Luna having a knack for running away from boys and leaving them confused and lost in her wake. No. Is the only similar thought they share in that moment. For seperate reasons.

------------------------------------------------

Luna gets back to Cleveland around 2A. Landing back at Hopkins International, she finally checks her phone. There's a missed call and Snap from Colson.

Luna can't help the grin on her face as she catches an Uber home to Colson's. It's been a long day and all she wants is to be held by him. That's it.

------------------------------------------------

The house is still raging from Hotel Diablo's success when Luna walks in. There's a shit ton and all of them are fuck face wasted, with randos filling the house.

"Yo." Luna calls to Colson while he's sat, with his legs wide on the pool table as different girls fawn all over him. "You FUCKING done?" She asks with an attitude, more frustrated with herself than him.

"Kitten...." Colson's off the pool table and in front of Luna before she can bitch anymore. "What's good?" He drunkenly asks her as he pulls her in for a sloppy kiss.

"Don't fucking Kitten me." Luna counters with a smirk after she kisses Colson, staking her claim to any fool in sight.

"But you're my baaaaa-by...." Colson slurs as he drops kisses all over Luna's face.

"Let's go upstairs then...." She lightly giggles as she persuades him.

Standing at the bottom step Luna looks at Colson. One Look and he's done.

"I'M OUT!!" Colson shouts to the random girl's groans.

Luna looks over her shoulder as Colson grabs her hand. Heading up the stairs together, it's one of the better decision both have made in the last 24hrs.

-------------------------------------------------

To be continued....

[werezmastarbucks]

tapes

tapes masterlist 

tape final 23/23

word count: 1661

TAPE FINAL

This last tape is really loud and really dark, quite uncomfortable to watch, to be honest. If you have motion sickness, it’s highly advised that you just read the transcript. So, it starts in the kitchen. It’s night time, and the light goes out the next second after the recording goes on. There’s silence in the house, but then we can here steps. They’re light, quick, and soon, there’s Malachai. My, my, what a handsome young man he is now. The moonlight is silver on his face as he picks up the camera. His eyes seem completely black in the twilight of the kitchen. There’s pans and platters shining bleakly.

“It’s almost my birthday”, he says quietly, looking in the camera, “and everybody’s asleep. I wanna start celebration early, because it’s very probable that this is the last time I see my precious sissy. My name is Kai Parker, and this is my little home movie”.

Suddenly, you can he wheezing. Can you? Can you hear wheezing? It’s very close.

“Can you hear him? It’s the Gemini coven leader wetting himself on the kitchen floor. Hold it in, dad”, he says and picks the camera up.

He doesn’t hold it to his face, and just waves it in his hand as he walks through the kitchen. We can see the cupboard door. There’s a metal sound, like he’s taking a knife out of the knife box. Well, not ‘like’. He’s taking a knife out.

He’s walking around the house quietly, almost like a ghost. He goes upstairs and not a single step creaks under his feet. He comes in his parents’ bedroom quietly.

He finally puts the camera to her face as she’s sleeping.

“Mum. Ma-ma. Mum”, he whispers. There’s dark silhouette moving on the bed.

“Kai?” he asks, his voice is raspy from sleep.

“Yes. Dad’s not feeling good”.

She sniffs and lifts herself on one elbow.

“What’s happening, Kai?” she’s still calm. You can see the whites of her eyes in the darkness.

“He’s downstairs, in the kitchen”, Malachai whispers.

“Why?”

“He’s not feeling well”.

Mama Parker sits up in bed and looks at her son.

“Not well – how? Does he need help?”

“No. I poisoned him”.

Movement. Slap! Slash! Kai hits his mother with the knife. She grunts shortly and falls back as he stabs her again. Who knew it would be such a blunt sound? Bang, bang, bang. She moans very quietly, as if saying, I’m grateful for you, Malachai.

He leaves the room, closes the door quietly. There’s a knock on the wall.

“Parkers! Wake up!” his voice shatters through the house, but at first, it’s silent.

He snaps another door open, and we can see the moonlight briefly again. Blue on white walls. He walks up to the two beds.

“Malachai”, this strict voice with the hint of annoyance that articulates every single consonant belongs to Samantha. There’s shuffling in the dark, and she yelps in pain. Kai throws the camera on the nightstand and it lays on the side. Kai drags Sam out of her bed, and Tyler springs to help her, but Kai kicks him in the stomach.

“You wait for your turn, four eyed fucker”.

He drags the girl out of the room and throws her on the floor by the sound of it.

“Stop twisting, bitch!”

She whines.

Reappearing in the doorframe, we can see that he’s wearing his favorite blue t-shirt with a rainbow. Immature!

He looks around and his stare falls upon the open wardrobe.

“Mum! Dad!” Tyler screams from his bed. Malachai dismisses him with a wave of his hand and reaches for the skipping rope. There’s fidgeting behind the door.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Kai, stop, please, what are you doing?”

“Kai, stop, please”, he mocks her.

Sam screams, and they wrestle a little. Then there’s a sound of thump, and everything’s quiet. Tyler jumps from the bed and heads for the door, and Kai reappears again, like a ghost, and catches him.

“Yeah, let’s go”.

“No, please, fesmatus…”

The older knows all their tricks. Kai slaps his hand on Tyler’s face, covering his mouth, and the boy’s body starts shaking as magic flows into Kai’s body. He drags his brother from the room, too.

“Stop fidgeting!” a voice commands from the hall. There’s a scream. Tyler shrieks when he sees something – I wonder what that is?

Another thump. He works so quick, you gotta admire his composure.

He returns for the camera. Taking the knife out of his pants, he weighs it against the camera’s eye, and even in the pale moonlight, it’s obvious the sticky black on the blade is blood.

“Kids! Wakey-wakey time!” he yells again and his ever-seeing friend travels smoothly in his hand. You can see the dark hall walls, and finally, Josette’s voice goes,

“It’s the middle of the night! Fucking go to bed!”

Kai laughs quietly. He knocks on the walls again, counts: one, two, three, four, five. Five steps until the next room. There’s someone walking up to him.

“Kai”, a voice in the end of the corridor, “what are you doing?”

“Go down the stairs and look”, he suggests. The camera shuffles against his leg and it’s dark again. A door opens.

Kai whistles.

“Ashley, baby, are you up?”

“Kai?”

It’s Joey speaking.

“Yeah, buddy. Hello. Sit tight, alright? Or run, I don’t care”.

He puts the camera in the bottom of the bed so that you can see it when he lifts his arm and dives the kitchen knife into the little girl’s stomach. Ashley doesn’t even scream. But Josette does – she screams from downstairs and runs back, her footsteps loud, deep and harsh. She’s still yelling, not really saying anything, when she slams the door open and she, just as we do, sees Kai carving something with the knife on the body of his sister.

“Oh my god! Joey, run!”

“Modus”, Kai waves one hand and there’s a sound like a body is falling, and Josette is silent. Joey’s footsteps are like a puppy’s: he runs fast, finely, but his legs are short. Kai’s still bent over his little sister’s body, working with the knife. Blood splatters up onto his shirt, but he doesn’t even blink. In such darkness we can only tell the outlines of his face. There’s loud banging from the downstairs – Joey ties to get out of the house – but Malachai had secures all the doors beforehand. He’s not going to run around the yard like a fucking idiot chasing his siblings.

“There it is! Finally”, he exhales as he takes out an organ from Ashley’s belly. It’s big and black and doesn’t really look like anything, but it’s soaking in blood. Kai turns to the window to see better and studies it, frowning, twisting it in his hand. A second – and he loses interest. The organ goes on the floor with a quiet splash. He walks to the camera and picks it up again.

“We’re playing operation with Joey all the time”, he says calmly as he walks out of the room. The camera records the floor and Josette’s unconscious body that’s laying in the hall.

“And I always have trouble finding liver. I mean, it’s so big, and it doesn’t move around, right? But now I finally found it, so Joey can suck it. Liv, Luke! Are you up?”

The house is quiet for now, but there’s footsteps on the first floor. Kai descends the stairs and lifts the camera to film the banisters.

“Damn it, the two nerds”, he says with a lot of passion, looking at Sam and Tyler’s bodies hanging down. In their pajamas, they look like dolls, pale in the blank light of the moon.

“Joey!”

“Yes?” a voice comes from the living room. Kai laughs out.

“Wow! You’re an idiot. Come here, buddy”.

“Are you going to hurt me? Please, don’t”.

He films the boy, crawling out of the darkness of the room. Big couch and the armchairs stand still like monoliths.

“Of course, not”, his voice is full of mockery, but Joey steps out in the light line. His little face is wary, his eyes are big like cherries. He’s a pretty boy, one like Kai used to be when he was his age. Only, his face was bruised, and Joey’s isn’t. and Joey doesn’t have a flight-or-flight instinct. He has something Malachai never learned: feeling of trust. Kai tells him to step to him, and he does, like a kid is supposed to.

“I wanna show you something cool on the camera, come here”.

Joey approaches him, and the whole picture flies away. Bang! Joey yelps like a kitten, once. Thump! Thump! Thump! There’s a loud crack. The living room hops up and down as Kai beats the camera into his brother’s skull. Are you nauseous yet? I mean, that’s a bit excessive, how many times do you really have to hit a seven year old kid?

He’s breathing. But there’s no rest for the wicked: Jo’s up. She runs to the master bedroom by the likes of it: there should be a scream.

“Oh my god! Mum!”

She discovered Martha.

He gets up and the camera flies. Kai twists his arm and we can see him again. There are drops of blood on his forehead, but the camera’s lens is all covered in dark liquid. He frowns and rubs it with his finger.

“Just want to let you know”, he says, heading for the stairs, “I’ve never heard so many ‘pleases’ in my life before. It’s a Christmas miracle. I mean, merge miracle. Jo!” he yells, “where are the twins? Are they in beds?”

He looks in the camera again, but at that very moment he jumps into the spot of darkness. We can only hear his breathing now.

“Well, I gotta go. Gonna montage the shit out of it later”.

There’s a click, and the tape is over.