#but yknow. I was unfortunately already expecting something like this

[saucetail-hasanewblog]

NOOOOO HAITI NOOOOOO CHINA also wtf happened between zambia and japan that is just brutal

NOOOOOO VIETNAM

[dizzyjaden]

hihihi soooo. I want this to involve Kaeya, Xiao, and Dottore (heheh) if that’s okay. Pick whoever u want if only one ! But anyways

What if you’re a member of the armed forces (a knight of Favonius, a member of the millelith, and a fatui agent respectively). And you get injured on the job. Like, injured enough to warrant a hospital stay. Pretty *badly* hurt. What are those three doing, yknow? How do they react? Are they helping? How so? That type of stuff

✦ GENSHIN MEN WHEN YOU GET HURT ✦

Thank you for asking, let's find out.

Pairings: Kaeya, Xiao, Dottore x gn! Reader

♤ Summary: You got hurt and need medical assistance.

♤ Warnings: Severe injury (abdominal stab wound, broken arm, various bruises and cuts), slight yummy angst, soft Dottore

♤ A/N: I know this isn't exactly a request but I'm treating it like a request because I wanna get stuff posted. I'm also really not the best at Kaeya, so forgive me in advance if he's fugly. Enjoy!

Kaeya:

As a knight, you know that when an issue arises in Mondstadt, you’re going to stand on the frontlines for your city. It’s what is expected of you, and what you have accepted for yourself. You don’t mind it, your city is important to you. Your job is important to you. It’s actually how you met your boyfriend, Kaeya, who is also very important to you. Perhaps that’s why when the two of you were out fighting off abyss mages to protect a group of civilians, you threw yourself right in front of him as a shard of ice, summoned by a cryo abyss mage, was sent flying straight towards his chest. Instead of his chest, it impaled you in your stomach, right beneath your ribcage.

It takes him a moment to process what just happened, in an instant everything pauses and he’s focused entirely on you. Needless to say, when he sees you fall to your knees, holding your stomach in agony, he practically rips the remaining mages apart and hurries to tend to you.

Thankfully the wound is not horrifically deep, the distance between you and the mage prevented it from flying fast enough, but you are still bleeding from your stomach, which is rather alarming. He hides his panic though, not wanting to upset you further when you’re already injured. He ties his belt tightly around the wound and picks you up, you’ve never been stabbed before so obviously you’re quite concerned with your injury, because of this he chooses to gaslight you while he rushes to get you back to the city. “It’s fine, I’ve seen way worse! You worry too much.” 

Kaeya wants to remain by your side when he does finally get you to a doctor, he is quite irritable when he can’t go back with you but ultimately waits, impatiently so. When you’re all patched up he rushes into the room and gives you a tight, slightly painful hug. When you remind him that you’re freshly injured his face falls and a hurried apology leaves his lips.

The two of you spend the rest of the day laughing and teasing each other about the unfortunate incident, Kaeya is glad it’s already something you can laugh about, but he truthfully feels guilty he let that happen to you when it was such an easy fight. He’ll get you whatever you need until you’re fully recovered.

Xiao:

Honestly, Xiao would just prefer if you called his name before you fought anything. Yes, he knows you’re trained. Yes, he knows you’re strong. But he’s an adeptus and he’s willing to protect you. Why won’t you just utilize that and not put yourself at risk? He doesn’t understand. But he doesn’t ask any questions when he’s called by you in your time of need. He teleports straight to your location, where he finds you gravely injured with multiple gashes and bruises on your body, and a small crowd of ruin guards encircling your fallen figure. He quickly stands in front of you, calculates how much time he has based on the severity of your injuries, and then tears them all to shreds. 

As he fights he counts each second that passes, thinking about your blood loss. He manages to defeat them in thirty-one seconds, but he was planning on thirty. He teleports back to you, picks you up, and then teleports you to the nearest hospital. You’re too weak at this point to really register anything so he hands you over to the doctors wordlessly and then leaves you there.

When you’re fixed up and a bit more conscious, you quickly call his name and he meekly appears with a bouquet of flowers he’d gathered while you were getting treated. “For the single second that I let you bleed.” He explains his intention behind the small gift. He’s convinced you’ve probably been irritated at him since you got to the hospital, but you are entirely unsure of what he means. Xiao is such a perfectionist when it comes to keeping you safe, but you’re just grateful he came at all. When you take his gift, you express this and he isn’t sure what to make of it, but he doesn’t wish to make it a bigger deal than he already has so he simply nods and then lectures you for nearly an hour about not calling sooner.

Dottore:

When Dottore hears from an associate that you’ve been injured while out on a mission, he is right on it. He doesn’t ask any questions about your condition, he can figure that out when he finds you. And when he does, he is livid. Whatever opponent you faced completely broke your arm! It doesn’t matter if you were already about to receive treatment, he trusts nobody but himself to help you. As a harbinger, what he says goes so he’s going to take care of it. 

While he’s fixing your arm he’s asking you questions about who did this to you. He’s disappointed to hear you already managed to defeat them. He was hoping to have the opportunity to make their death so much longer than the merciful quick bullet you gave them. But, at least they aren’t alive anymore.

Once that’s out of the way, he gives you gentle kisses and hushed words of comfort to take care of you. Really, it’s not that big of a deal to a fatui soldier like yourself and you find his reaction dramatic, but he likes taking care of you and he just has to smother you right now so, tough luck I guess.

He makes sure you take it easy for a while, not allowing you to do anything strenuous. If you happen to argue with him about it, he’ll simply order you to stay home and rest. He’s a harbinger, remember?

[angsthology]

“im just excited, is all” — or an alt title: roo vs. the australian allegations

who is roo, really? why is roo?

a/n a short one cause if im being honest theres just one tiny explanation and... yeah

or, yknow, alt alt title: daniel’s detective era

THE KANGAROO(KIE) VS. THE WORLD

“WOOOO!! I’M NEVER GONNA DIE!” she yelled into the radio, at this point not even shocking her engineer anymore.

“sure, kid.” he chuckled. “congratulations, again, i’ll see you out.”

as soon as she parked her car, the girl quickly jumped out of her seat and stand on the nose of her car, jumping repeatedly with both her feet going up and down excitedly. it ends with a last hard jump off the car and her hands up in the air, yelling on the top of her lungs.

when suddenly — to everyone’s dismay — she started shuffling. well, attempted, shuffling.

daniel, who had the pleasure of sharing the podium with her and was there to witness it first hand, could not help but unknowingly let his hand fly to his mouth to muffle his laughter. man, he just took off his balaclava, he thought.

then, just his luck, the girl stopped mid-shuffle and looked towards his way and waved at him excitedly before running towards the australian and attacking him in a bear-hug.

of course, the man expected the hug, what he didn’t expect was how strong it was going to be.

he let out a muffled “oof” as soon as she collided with him. daniel did not think he has ever gotten a hug this tight. let alone receiving it from a girl almost half his size.

“congratulations!” she could not get bored of hearing that. making her hug him tighter, “okay, oh, lord, i can’t breathe. please.”

“oh—hehe, sorry.” she immediately let go of the man and ran off—well, more hopped off—to get herself weighed.

the older man could not help but chuckle watching her hop away.

again, really?

the girl could never not get bored of all the demeaning questions that seemed to only be targeted towards her.

unfortunately for them, she was not having it that day.

so here she was, berating a man who was like generations behind her — and everyone else — with the rest of the grid listening, watching in amusement.

they always enjoy watching her absolutely destroying male fossils that walked the paddock. it was free entertainment.

her manager didn’t even stop her anymore — well, he did, usually when he knows she’ll say something completely unhinged and not for viewers ears — he just watches with a proud smile like the rest of the drivers until she eventually runs out of breath, all the while also stealing it from the opposite person.

and now it’s about five minutes later and the room was silent, really soaking in her words.

as usual, daniel was the one to break the silence — his tone doing its best to relief the tension that clouded the room.

“remind me not to piss you off.”

sebastian found his voice when he looked towards daniel, “i really admire her agression.”

“i try.”

the mclaren driver was minding his own business when suddenly he felt someone plop down on the seat next to him.

said person didn’t say anything, they just stared at him blankly for a good few seconds. in return, daniel had the expression equivalent of a question mark.

until eventually he felt a little creeped out, “what do you want?”

her response was… weirder.

“what do you want?”

“…what?”

suddenly, out of nowhere, the twenty-two-year-old pulls out a fanny pack from the side. and when she opened it, they were both met with all kinds of candy.

daniel raised his eyebrows at the girl.

“this stays between us.”

it did, but also no, she had previously already approached alex, mick, lando, and yuki, doing the exact same thing.

“…okay?” he then removed the confused expression on his face to one of curiosity of what’s inside the pack, “you got any haribo?”

“everyone, everyone, everyone!”

the girl hopped over to the group of men, dragging a slightly smaller one with her.

“yes, yes, yes!” replied george.

she the shoved the brunette girl in her arms to the front, holding her by both her forearms from the back.

“i want you all to meet daisy-mae!”

a strings of ‘hi’s and ‘hello’s along with ‘nice to meet you’s were exchanged.

the young driver then noticed a certain australian missing.

“hey where’s dan— DANNY!” she jumped when she saw said man approaching. as usual, she excitedly hopped her way over to him.

he chuckled, “hey, roo.”

at that, she stopped mid-way and looked at him confused, “who?”

“you.”

“huh.”

“you’re like a ‘lil kangaroo, y’know?”

still confused, she was brought out of a daze when she heard loud sounds of agreement from behind her.

“that’s what she is!”

“aw, that’s cute, our little kangaroo…”

“LITTLE?!”

taglist; @treehouse-mouse @disneyprincemuke @yansbolobao @leilanixx @judespoisons @vellicora

hope this didnt disappoint </3

[meanbossart]

Misc. Ask compilation

These aren't all of the asks I want to reply to, just some that I can answer relatively quickly to clean the ol' inbox out before things get out of hand. Thanks for your patience!

HAHAHA THANK YOU FOR PERUSING AROUND and for enjoying my work! I had a... Weird Gale experience my first playthrough which led to his characterization being what it is in my comics. Here's the beat-by-beat of all the shenanigans: https://meanbossart.tumblr.com/post/740827466716807168/alright-i-am-like-90-sure-there-is-one-line-in-a

And here's just some of my personal thoughts on him! https://meanbossart.tumblr.com/post/736193145686114305/can-you-tell-me-more-about-how-you-would-make-gale

I would be lying if I said I'm not conflicted to know my style still bears some remnants of my edgy teen roots (not your fault not noticing it though, you aren't the first and won't be the last) BUT... That comic did mean a lot to me as a youth, so I guess I should be proud 🤷 and honestly it is a little cool that such a thing would survive for so long in what I do, crazy how that works.

LMAO, re: the bottom/top debacle, I was honestly so surprised to see people react to it like it's something novel. If I ever expected to get any push back on the matter, I thought it would be from people assuming DU drow was the top and taking issue with how violent and big he is (and yknow, some people are weirdly protective of Astarion as if he isn't a sneaky murder machine rippling with lean muscle)

Very disheartening to see that mindset still so alive and well among young people, but I guess it just means I gotta draw DU drow throwing more back and Astarion drooling over more ass until the stereotype is forcefully banished out of people's minds!

(more asks below the cut)

"Sleeper agent activation phrase" absolutely took me out, Thank you so much LOL

YEAH I got it pretty late though, Astarion had already told my durge that he was a vampire of his own accord (and the response was, of course, "no duh") I forgot wheter this happened before or after the first romance scene triggered, but I think after.

Since this was after DU drow decided he was gonna fuck him out of pure contrarian spite and was shamelessly laying it extremely thick, He happilly let Astarion drink his blood. Hell, he was probably a little Too Eager - the guy likes pain and he likes letting people he trusts do with his body whatever they will, and while he didn't yet trust Astarion at that point, that event might've very well reminded him of something from his past that planted a seed which would eventually grow into his genuine affection for the guy.

Ah, he definitely got a half-chub as it happened too. I'm sure Astarion noticed it and just walked off rolling his eyes and thinking "eugh of course" lmao.

Hello!!!

Oh man, I grew up fascinated with horror things. I remember from a very young age just looking at the covers and backs of horror movies at the film-rental even though I wasn't allowed to watch them. I was also easily scared but I sought those things out anyway - I think i just enjoyed the visceral reactions it drew out of me and was always curious about most things taboo.

When I got access to the internet that just opened a (very unfortunate) door to all things vile and awful like it did for so many people at that age in time. Though my tastes have changed a lot since then (Less August Underground, more The Devils kind of guy nowadays) my stories and art are just always going to fall into a horror-y category because I just... Don't think there's many better ways to showcase the human experience and emotional range without many of the elements native to the genre, and I'm all about that.

Thank you for your question and your sweet words, have a good week yourself!

I did a little write-up about that over here! https://meanbossart.tumblr.com/post/742508493562593280/i-dont-have-a-particular-question-in-mind-sorry

That's the result of a scene that happens relatively early in the story I'm writing ("A Novel Experience" on Ao3).

{SPOILERS} DU drow accidentally passes out on a blade which puts a relatively deep gash on his hip. Meanwhile, Astarion is weakened and starved after certain events that transpired the prior night. They have a private exchange both in a somewhat hazy-state of mind and Astarion ends up prodding and prying at his wound while feeding, so it's a laceration and bite mark that just scarred over badly.

Elves apparently don't grow body hair so never LOL guess they'll just have to slip&slide up on each other for heat

[midnightmoonkiss]

Stab My Heart

Wednesday Addams X AFAB! Vampire! Reader // minors dni! 18+!

WARNINGS!: dom! aged up Wednesday, intense knife kink, intense blood kink, strap-on, sadist x masochist?, lots of blood and kinda gorey, mentions of stabbing and slicing for pleasure

Word Count: 2k+

A/N: This is a crazy smut fic so viewer discretion is HEAVILY advised. I got a fucked up idea when I was feeling down so I wrote my feelings LOL. Also I’m not responsible for any discomfort reading this may cause - y’all have been warned so tread carefully mhm. This isn’t for the faint of heart, but it’s not like your guts are exposed yknow

Just To Clarify:

Reader is half vampire, a ‘hybrid’

Reader doesn’t feel pain like a normal person

Based on the song “I’m in love with a killer”

Characters are around ages 21+ and in college

Fake vampire lore lol

💀heh

Dating Wednesday Addams was like dating a ticking time bomb, any second she could go off without so much as a warning.

However, the adrenaline you feel, the excitement, you were far too addicted to settle for anything less.

Her soft yet strong hands, covered in your own sticky blood.. nothing aroused you more. Maybe you were as twisted as her.

Essentially, you were perfect for eachother in every single way. A sadist who enjoys torture and knives, and a masochist who quite literally feels more pleasure than pain when getting stabbed.

You sure hoped no one ever attempted to mug you with a knife, they’d end up more scarred than you.

. .

In vampire society, hybrids weren’t too uncommon. They could lean more towards the human side, or more towards the vampire side. Only few were blessed with eternal life, human genes far too weak to overcome the venomous vampiric DNA. A key way for a full fledged vampire parent to tell just where their child lies on the line is brutally known as the stabbing test.

Yes, stabbing.

Its piercing through the skin that sets a vampire apart from a human.

Full fledged vampires could be stabbed and feel almost nothing at all, fully healing soon after. Its the lack of blood that was the telltale sign, the only small amount left inside their bodies being a black color.

This was the reason why full fledged ones felt cold to the touch.

A hybrid leaning more towards the human side would feel a somewhat regular amount of pain, but it’s dull in comparison. Fresh blood would spew from the wound, creating a large mess. Hybrids like this were rare.

You were on the line closer to vampires. You’d feel the piercing sting, the rush of warmth gushing from your wound, but barely flinching. It just didn’t bother you.

This barbaric test was admistered by your mother senior year at Nevermore during parents weekend - right across from Wednesday Addams, a girl you didn’t even know but sat near on this day only because your mother and her mother were friends from their academy days.

She stabbed you right in the neck, already fully confident that you would be completely fine. She just had to test this theory. She didn’t mean to catch you off guard, she fully expected you to dodge or something.

But you didn’t.

Your blood spurted onto your mother, who wore a knowing yet disappointed grin, still maintaining her conversation with Morticia. Unfortunately, you choked on the blood bubbling in your throat and coughed a significant amount onto the gothic girl.

Red mixed with black, a beautiful sight just like the one you saw at the Rave’N some time agox

You wouldve apologized immediately if your mother hadn’t temporarily rendered you inable to speak.

Surprisingly, though, it was Wednesday who reached across the table, pulling the knife from your neck before you had the chance, her eyes glued to the unusually dark blood spewing from the wound. Even if you were more vampire than human, you still bled quite a bit.

It was a gruesome and a horrific sight to most people, but you supposed the Addams family wasn’t like most people.

In fact, you were pretty sure Wednesday in particular liked the sight of blood.

Of course, the sudden significant amount of blood loss made you faint, but it wasn’t really that painful.

By the time you woke up, the wound was completely healed.. but you were in dire need of a new uniform. You looked like you were just murdered.

After that day, Wednesday was infatuated by you. Or perhaps you had just imagined it, because for the rest of senior year she was constantly trying to catch you off-guard and stab you.

A deadly dance. It was a bit annoying when you were carrying something like a cup of coffee or juice and you accidentally spill it to avoid the blade.

You learned from a text from your mother a month after you fainting that this was because she had asked Wednesday to keep you on your toes, not at all happy that you couldn’t react fast enough to stop her from stabbing you - claiming that you embarrassed her.

It was easy to conclude that vampire society was beyond fucked up from this text, but it was hard to complain. A pretty girl constantly stalking you, trying to catch you off guard to deliver a bloody blow was like a romantic gesture in your eyes.

You admit, you senses were shit, and she was helping you listen to them more by doing this. You supposed it was necessary, on the account of the real world, the world outside of Nevermore, absolutely hating vampires. No doubt in your mind, someone else would probably stab you too - and it would ruin your clothes. Regardless, a blow to the heart was still fatal, you had to be careful.

It was like cat and mouse, but the mouse wouldnt die from the cat piercing its tiny body with its razor sharp claws.

And you definitely knew the chase excited her as much as it did you - you did become friends from this after all.

And after Nevermore, you became lovers.

She was no longer as persistent in her persuit to catch you off guard and drive a dragger in your gut, especially after you finally learned how to dodge, far too busy with university.

Writing was still her passion, but so was gore and detective work. Yes, she was working towards becoming a forensic investigator, planning to use real life experiences to aid in her writing creativity - just like she did while at Nevermore.

There was no doubt in your mind, she would be the best.

She always was the best at most things she did, and bringing you pleasure was something she believed only she could do.

Yes, a sickeningly twisted match made in hell.

Luckily, you found a cheap house to live in after you graduated from the academy. Multiple people mysteriously died in it and now it was dirt cheap. Perfect for the creepy duo.

She wanted it to stay a creepy, an abandoned looking mess, but you eventually compromised and got a contractor to renovate the place with leftover funds. It quite literally looked like it could fall apart at any second.

Once done, it was still creepy but now it was beautiful, like a black dahlia.

Though it’s definitely haunted, the only one with permission to end your life was Wednesday herself.

Every time she tied you to your shared bed and lightly dragged a knife down your stomach she’d remind you. She could easily sink it into your heart at any moment, twisting it in your flesh.

You swore this.. kink.. only developed after getting involved with this girl. Not that you minded. You adored being the only one who could fulfill her twisted desires.

Wet squelches filled the air, your thighs trembling as they sat wrapped tightly around her small waist, her black strap on pounding into you with trained exact precision that made your insides feel like goo and set your mind on ablaze.

“Mine..” She’d rasp, leaning over you to gaze into your hazy (e/c) eyes, bloodied, custom carved knife sitting right against the base of your neck, “You’re mine.”

Wednesday was a pretty possessive person over what was hers.

She carved a W into the skin just below your collar bone, above your heart that skipped a beat. Wednesday watched in sick satisfaction as your back arched, your slick lips parting to moan like a slut with each slice as your own warm blood trickled down your body, staining the white sheets that was already covered in blood.

It looked like a crime scene. The bed groaned as you tugged at the restraints, white hot pleasure blinding you. The burn felt so good, pleasure blossoming like flowers in the spring.

Your abused pussy clenched down so hard on her strap-on that you momentarily made it hard for her to move deep inside of you, eliciting a slight chuckle from her.

“Sweet thing, my dear poisioned apple..” She drawled as you whimpered, staring with doe eyes up at her, knife digging into your skin as she dragged it up your throat to just under your chin. Blood painted your skin in a beautiful black cherry color as you shakily inhaled.

The silvery light of the moon poured in from the hastily shut black curtains, illuminating her breathtaking form. She looked like more of a corpse than you, beauty ethereal.

It was moments like these that you swore you were under some sort of spell, frozen in time.

“You amaze me.”

The bloodied knife was discarded beside you, having already served its purpose - evidence being the multiple healed stab wounds from earlier in the night.

Her cold hands smeared with crimson moved one of your legs up onto her shoulder so she could fuck you deeper into the creaking mattress, spiders crawling around in her stomach at the beautiful cries you let out. She then grabbed the red vibrator sitting on the bed, turning it on medium before holding it to your cute, twitching clit.

“A-aAh!”

The sudden buzzing sensation against your sensitive bundle of already abused nerves made you yelp, damn near pushing her away from you as your hips jerked, body subconsciously squirming to get away from the sudden intense pleasure.

“W-Wednesday!! Wednesday-! Aa-aahn!! S’to much!! It’s ugNN!”

The smirking ravenette eagerly drank up your besutiful cries, even going as far as to lick away the stray tears leaking from your eyes.

You couldn’t escape her intense love even if you tried. Not that you would want to.

There was a safe word, you’d use it if you needed to.

Roughly grasping your face with her other hand, she pulled you in for a searing hot kiss that was undeniably lewd, your fangs accidentally cutting her lip as she kissed you deeply.

Her lips felt like molten hot lava against your own.

Your brain was absolutely fried, the delicious taste of her own blood seeping into your mouth sending you over the edge as her tongue fought a one sided battle with your own.

You could barely think, she once again fucked you dumb.

Pleasure so intense you felt as though your nerves were on fire shot down your spine as she drank your moans and pathetic whines with lips painted in her own blood. The familiar, embarrassing feeling filled your system as your squirted all over your lovers lower body, creaming on the strap-on that was fucking you through your intense orgasm.

Your nails dug into your palms, feeling so helpless from the mind-shattering pleasure overtaking you.

The juices from your cunt left a large puddle below your ass, mixing with the arousal that dripped down her own creamy thighs.

Her hips continuing to snap into yours did nothing to ground you, neither did her tender touch on your cheek. Your whole body was shaking as fresh tears poured from your eyes from how overwhelming and overstimulating the pleasure she graciously gifted you with was.

“There, there, (Y/N),” She cooed, voice sweet like sugar, “It’s alright. I’m here.”

Her voice, usually monotonous but now sprinkled with adoration, faded away as black dots overtook your vision - you passed out from exhaustion.

That was the fifth intense orgasm of the night, after all.

Wednesday had a lot of pent of frustration that night from work and school, and you were all too willing to indulge her.

Stilling her hips, she kissed sweetly at your neck that was absolutely covered in her love bites before licking a long stripe up your throat, tasting your own metallic blood on her tongue. She quite enjoyed the taste that was uniquely yours.

Pulling away, she observed your bloodied form with unblinking eyes whilst sitting back on her haunches, huffing out a breath from the workout.

You were just what she needed.

All your wounds were already healed, the blood from older ones from earlier in the night having already crusted while the newer blood remained wet.

Sighing, Wednesday pulled out of your sweet pussy, watching for a moment as you clenched around nothing.

Intense after care was always a must after love-making sessions like these, and she prided herself in being an expert at it. A warm wash cloth was already on your chest as she began gently wiping away the blood, occasionally kissing at the freshly cleaned skin.

Any ghosts in this house were definitely traumatized, and no doubt afraid of her at this point. Wednesday’s lips twitched with a slight smile at the thought.

She had already turned the bath faucet on, your favorite essential oils already in the tub, as well as a few lit candles around the room to add to the ambience. She loves you, and she knew little things like this showed it.

You’d wake up soon, and she’d be damned if you werent relaxing in that tub when you did. She knew your body would be sore, the warm water should have already relaxed your arching muscles by the time you awake.

While your sex life may be fucked up and twisted in a way normies couldn’t understand, hell - you were pretty sure only some vampires saw the appeal, it was fun and full of unwavering love, devotion, and loyalty. Even if it looked like medieval torture and you both had to constantly buy new sheets.

Yes, you were hers as she was yours - the W above your chest may have fully healed, leaving no trace of it’s existence, but Wednesday had already stabbed her dagger into your heart years ago.

please be kind im fragile lolol

.

[cherubguts0]

Hiii<3 may I request the Wammy boys and L with a gf or s/o that’s bitchy to literally everyone expect for them?

🕯 Hi!! Ofc u can! I hope you enjoy this, and I apologize for L’s being short (￣ω￣;)

The Wammy Boys And Their Bitchy S/o

Characters: L Lawlet, Near, mello, and Matt

🕯X reader

🕯fluff and angst, a little suggestive

L Lawlet:

L knew that you could be bitchy, I mean hell you weren’t the most charming person when you two first met, however as time went on you began to warm up to him. Soon Turing into a perfect lap dog.

Even now, sat on the desk between L and Light, you’re still the same person L had met. “Yknow y/n, it’s really distracting having you sit there” light said, looking up from his work.

“Shut up Kira” is all you said, watching as light furrowed his brow. “How many times do I have to say it!? I’m not Kira!”

“You definitely are, that’s why you’re so defensive, Kira!” You teased, Getting right in Lights face. L doing nothing to stop you, finding it amusing how angry light gets at the word Kira.

“God you’re so annoying, I can’t imagine how L puts up with you” light said bitterly, sitting back in his chair with his arms crossed. “I don’t see why L doesn’t lock you up already for being Kira, it’s written all over your face” you reply with a smirk.

“I unfortunately don’t have the evidence angel, also could you be a dear and ask watari to bring me some cake?” L said typing away on his computer. You smiled softly at him, hopping down from the desk and planting a soft kiss on his cheek. “Of course” you said, smacking light out side the head  as you walked past him.

“HEY! L Control your girlfriend” light complained to L. “I cant, plus it’s funny watching you two bicker” L replied, looking over at Light with his signature smile.

You really were his perfect lapdog

Near:

You’d always been over protective of near, you’d basically fight just about anyone who said something negative about it him. (You fought with mello the most though, especially during your wammy house days)

However, because of the Kira case, you’d been more on edge, sat behind near, watching him build tower after tower with dominoes.

“Hey near, I have that file for you” Linder said as she entered the room. “Just leave it on the table, and be careful please, I’ll be very upset if you ruin my work” near responded, twirling a strand of hair between his fingers, eyes never moving from his towers. “Of course” Linder said, walking over to you and setting the file on the table next to you. “By the way, there’s a new cafe that has opened up, I was wondering if you’d like to go” Linder asked, you felt fire in your chest.

“You know near cant leave this place, why would you ask something so stupid like that.” You asked, spitting venom at Linder. “It was just-“

“Just a stupid, dangerous idea,I mean seriously do you even think before you speak!? One wrong move and boom near is Fucking dead!” You raised your voice to speak over Linder, standing from your chair in anger as you spoke.

“Y/n, that’s enough.” Near said, Turing to look at the two of you. “Thank you for the ofer liner, but as y/n stated, I can’t leave. You are dismissed” he said in his monotone voice. Linder nodding, saying a silent apology as she left the room.

The room was quiet for a while, you final sat back down after cooling off. “What was that about?” Near asked, breaking the silence. “Nothing.” You said, watching as near looked over at you, stood, and walked till he was infront of you. “You’re lying, what’s wrong?” He asked again, putting his hand on your cheek.

You sighed, pulling near onto your lap and hiding your face in the side of his neck. “I’m just worried about you, this whole Kira case has me stressed out” you mumbled out, near humming in acknowledgement. You two sat in silence again, near twirling a strand of white hair between his fingers, his other hand wrapped around your shoulders as you had yours right wrapped around his waist.

“I don’t want to lose you Nate, you mean to much to me” you confessed, nears eyes widening at the use of his real name.

“You won’t lose me y/n” near reassured, pushing you back a little so he could leave kisses on your face, wiping away the tears that began to spill from your eyes.

✞𝑆𝑜𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑓𝑜𝑟 𝑔𝑒𝑡𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑔𝑠𝑡𝑦 𝑜𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑛𝑒 (￣ω￣;)

Mello:

Dating a mafia boss isn’t the easiest thing in the world. With random girls constantly coming over to late night missions. However your managed to keep things under control, mellos’ men feared you, they knew not to back talk to you. After all, you weren’t afraid to pop one through their skulls.

“Hey, y/n, what’s with the slutty attire today?” One of the newer men asked, “Hmm?” You responded, sat on mellos lap, only wearing one of his shirts, black panties, and black Lacey stalkings to match.

“You heard me, you look like one of these prostitutes” the guy snickered, pulling the girls on either side of him closer.

“Dude shut up-“ one of the older guys said, only to be cut off “why should I? They’re just some whore who got lucky enough to sleep with the head hauncho” he continued.

All you could do is laugh,honestly, putting your hand on mellos chest and curling forward as you let out the loudest laugh, a sinister tone coming through as the guy who was talking shit started to get nervous. “What you laughing at whore!? I’ll fuck you up you hear me!!” He said, quickly taking a stand.

“Oh? You? Fuck me up?” You responded cockily, also taking a stand. “Let’s get two things straight, the only person who fucks me, is mello.” You started, bending down to give mello a kiss on the cheek, sneaking the gun out of his hip. “And, I don’t fuck dead people.”

“Dea-“

BANG!

before he could even finish his sentence, you’d pulled the trigger on mellos gun, shooting him straight in the head. Brain matter and blood had covered the wall and girls behind him, both of which started screaming and crying as he fell to the floor.

“Good job baby” mello said, smiling up at you. “Thank you, can someone get those two outta here please?” You asked, watching as a bunch of guys quickly got to their feet to escort the girls out.

“You do kinda look like a whore though” mello joked, “only for you” you replied, taking your seat back in his lap, gently placing the gun against his temple. “But you better be careful, I’ve been known to kill people for saying stuff like that” you giggle as mello kisses you, moving your arms to wrap around his neck.

Matt:

You hated them. All of them. Every single girl who had came up to Matt during your date just to tell him how hot he was. It pissed you off, you wanted to crush their skulls for even looking at him. Like wise, every girl that had come upto you guys you told to fuck off, calling the worst names known to man until they left.

It was now towards the end of your date, the two of you sat outside a small café, the night stars shining brightly above you. “It’s so nice out” you said, looking up at the night time sky.

“It is, hey I’m really sorry about those girls coming upto me” Matt said, holding your hand from across the table. You looked over at him, sighing softly before you spoke. “It’s fine, you can’t help being-“

“Omg! You’re literally so pretty!” A girl cut you off before you could speak, you glared at her as she put her hand on Matt’s shoulder. “We should meet up sometime! Here’s my phone number!!” She said, completely ignoring your presence.

“Are you fucking kidding me!?!” You exclaimed loudly, quickly standing up and splashing water on girl la fancy dress. “Hey! What the fuck us wrong with you!”

“What’s wrong with yoy!? Cant you see we’re on a date! Why don’t you go whore yourself out to someone else!! You look like trash anyways he wouldn’t even go out with you!” You yelled at her, watching as tears started to form in her eyes. The girl quickly ran off, leaving you and Matt alone once again.

Thank god the outside seating area was empty.

“Y/n” Matt said, looking up at you with a worried look. You looked down at him, almost instantly calming down as you sat. “I’m sorry, I’m just so sick of people coming upto you!” You explained, crossing your arms as you looked down at your lap.

Matt stood, walking over too you and giving you a kiss on your head. “I know, you handled that a lot better then I would of.” He said, handing you the little peace of paper with the girls full legal name and phone number.

“You wanna sell her info, I’m sure you and I could find loads of shut with this info” Matt offered, watching as your fave brightened up. “Of course, sound alot more fun then staying here anyways” you said, standing and following Matt out to the street. Running into the same firm from earlier with her bestie.

“There they are! That fucking bitch!” She said loudly, you watched as her friend came over to you, pushing you back. “What the fuck is your problem!? Huh!” She said, getting all up in your face.

In one fello swoop, both you and matt pulled out your guns (something mello made you both carry considering how close you two are to the mafia), you aiming at the girls friends head and matt aiming at the trashy girls head.

Both girls froze, you were first to speak. “So help me god you bother me and my boyfriend one more time Well Fucking blast you both on this street.” Both girls looked at eachother and quickly ran off.

You sighed once again and brought your gun down, Matt pulled you into a hug. “You want me to carry you to the car? You must be exhausted from today”

All you could do was nod, lifting your arms up to wrap around Matt’s neck as he lifted you up with ease, bringing you back to his car.

Once you two got home, you spent the rest of the night cuddled up together, cyber stalking that girl and selling her info to loads of people.

[hikari-ni-naritai]

Hey there, do you have any tips on being ace? I know it's not true, but I do feel broken somehow for not "getting" it.

I'm a little confused about what you're asking. Do you mean like, you're ace and you want to know how to handle being different from allosexual people? Yeah that's easy as hell.

1. Remember that sex fuckin sucks. Or at the very least is not the all-important ultimate goal that everyone makes it out to be. Isn't it weird to see everyone hyping up something that's just obviously not that great? It's like if you went into a forum thread called "best video game of all time" and everyone's loudly debating between one of the Call of Duty games. Like are you broken for preferring an obscure but heartfelt jrpg? Or is everyone else just fucking weird?

2. Really the thing you need to work on is like. Prioritizing yourself. You need to become your own biggest fan. Of course you're not broken for being less interested in sex. You're just judging yourself by society's standards and thinking you should fit in. But would that make you happy? Do you WANT to go through life getting horny every time a mildly attractive girl passes you in the street? It's okay to like, want to fit in with others, but at some point you have to realize that you are you, and fitting in will make you miserable if you're doing things you don't want to do.

3. Don't struggle against who you are! Sure there are behaviors you can change, like if you're very rude you can work to change that, but like things at the core of your being? That'll just make you depressed. Nobody would expect a lesbian to be happy if she was dating a guy to fulfill her role in society or whatever. It's only by accepting ourselves as we are that we can live happily. Instead of wishing you could be different, work on identifying who exactly you are and then embrace that. There's already a billion of everyone else. There's only one of you, yknow?

Obviously none of this is like EASY advice. The unfortunate truth about this sort of thing is that changing your way of thinking is hard and takes fuckin ages. But if you work at it consistently and shoot down those negative thoughts when you have them, over time you'll look back and say "damn, I really thought I was unhappy being ace? This shit rules actually". Good luck anon 💙💙

[onestepbackwards]

howdy! "self aware pkmn masters ex team leaders" gal here, and i just wanted to say that i LOVED your additions to my post! i actually came up with a few of my own in the meantime, and i just wanted to share with ya (not a request, dw):

Ghetsis: after Old Man Plasma is done "rebelling" against your control, you start noticing that he grows.. more attached, in a way. he greets you more whenever you log into the game, and gives you a lecture on "leaving him hanging dry" if you don't log in for some time, whether it being real life stuff and whatnot. he DOES see you as some "deity" in a way, but he cannot afford the disapproval that you might give him if you don't like his offerings for you. what if you end up dropping him from your team entirely? what if you kick him from the trainer lodge? what if you forced him to fight alongside N???? oh, the pain and humiliation! and while he DOES see you as a fitting ruler for Team Plasma, he also unfortunately knows that you don't trust him for shit. and he DOES 'attempt' to be honest and not manipulative for once, but the app's code is holding him by the collar. but becoming plasma's ruler is a standing invitation, so he'll wait as long as he wants.

Giovanni: ah, gio. good ol Mr. "My Entire Team Dies To Grass And Water And Ice". he strangely became more lax and laid back after discovering his self awareness, and he grew more attached to you; mainly because you're the only person who seems to know about him more than he does about himself. oh, you just so happened to mention silver one time? well, now you got giovanni wondering if he can repair his doomed-from-the-start relationship with his son. but his interest peaks when you mention the pokemon anime, and like the Cunning Narcissistic Old Man he is, he wonders how HE is portrayed. luckily, he wasn't butchered too hard. but when you bring up jessie, james, and meowth? boy, he goes into total Angy mode. he rants about how incompetent they are, and how he allowed them to even be in the team to begin with. and he DOES get in character, which is a bit surprising for someone who just discovered his existence is a sham. and expect him to refer to himself as "Vanni" or "Gio", since he heard you call him that when you first got him and it just sorta stuck, yknow?

Maxie & Archie: just as before, Mr. Magma Man and Mr. Sea Pirate remained the same, but expect to see yourself get pulled into their dumb debates and arguments now that they consider you close enough to be a Team Magma/Aqua admin. you can just log in once and maxie will greet you at the pokecenter and be like "ah, (player). i need your opinion on something. you see, archie said that kyogre is the best legendary, but i beg to differ. im asking you because you are the only smart person i can rely on around here.." or archie just going on a 15 minute rant to you about how groudon sucks dookie and that maxie is a man child (they're still besties, dw) that needs to study the SEAS and not (in his words) "STUPID ITTY BITTY ROCKS". you're practically their closest thing to a friend, and that says a lot.

Cyrus: he gets quite curious about your world. you tell him about all the little things, from the blooming of flowers to space discoveries, and he feels like his third, nonexistent eye has been opened. he was already so focused on destroying a universe and creating one dull of emotions that he forgot to see the REAL beauty of what lies beyond. while he physically can't use palkia or dialga to do what he wanted in platinum, expect to see him go full fanboy mode over your world, your town, anything surrounding you. its almost adorable, even when he just has a -_- face the entire time. if he could be more expressive, you bet your ass he would be smiling rainbows at that point.

🥺🥺😭

These are so good

They all grow somewhat attached to you. You are the small bit of sanity they can grasp onto nowadays. Hearing you lets them relax.

Meanwhile, you get to learn about their lives, how Pasio is doing.

It’s strange. When you are offline, theres so much going ok, yet not at all. Not enough for anything major, but enough for it to seem like the place must be alive when you aren’t looking.

Even the bosses have recognized this. How odd it is.

They all grow so attached. If you end up not logging in for a while, you even start getting notifications from the app.

‘Are you there?’

‘Are you alright?’

‘What happened?’

Much to your surprise, they found out how to communicate through your notifications. They often fight who gets to even do so.

Most of them would never admit they are attached, but they all grow concerned regardless.

Archie and Maxie would probably be the only ones to openly admit they were worried. They definitely see you more as a friend, not just a potentially god like entity.

[streaminn]

Wednesday realizing her budding romantic relationship with Enid is suddenly in jeopardy by two girls who are already upfront with their intentions is so funny though, like I can imagine her first thought being murder, this is no longer a love triangle this is the hunger games big prize being a wonderful and confident werewolf gf

Wednesday: (Threatening with a knife) get back, you savages! You had your chance!

Enid: Willa?????

Not that she would be so upfront and obvious about it, but I can IMAGINE Enid presenting her as her “roomie” and Wednesday just death glaring harder than she has done ever before, meanwhile Enid is just (understandably) lost and begging Yoko for help, and Yoko thinks it’s absolutely hilarious and there is already a betting pool on which shorty with an attitude will win

Listen, I think witnessing Enid be absolutely distraught for two years with two separate girls than she did with Ajax could be proof that Enid needs some love in her life

Like pheobe left Enid quiet when the second semester of junior year came in and she wouldn't say a damn thing abt her experience. The only proof that smth happened are those posts this pheobe did on Enid's phone and pictures that Enid would look at sometimes before she locked them away

Bc dammit, I feel so bad for the amount of whump I put her through so I'm letting her be chased and feel the love of someone that could've went so well

Unfortunately life don't work like that, soooo

Enid moves on, slowly then she meets Tara during the start of senior year and it's this whirlwind all over again. Except her ass got in the middle of a murder mystery that lasts for three to four days and Enid doesn't know if what she's truly feeling is romance or the high of nearly dying bonding them together

In the end, it doesn't matter and so they hug it out and Enid is thinking this might just be her love life, drifting from person to person and losing parts of herself to a what could've been

So when smth is could happen with Wenclair near the end of senior year, Enid is rightfully afraid because she doesn't want to lose wednesday. There's something terrifying about high-school ending and realizing that their friendship could end with it too

So when February rolls around with Wenclair still skirting along each other, the girls roll in and holy shit the way the gang were vibing in Jericho did not at all expect Enid to freeze

And yknow your chances are on the line because Enid isnt insecure. Okay that's a lie, she is a lil bit, but shes brave at times and it says something that when a girl with leather jacket walks in, Enid fucking dives behind yoko

Wednesday thinks it's a potential murder victim, maybe it's an old girl who bullied her loathed love

Except leather jacket goes "Enid!" with the biggest smile ever and is Enid looking shy!? The wolf is peaking out of Yoko's shoulder, giving a wave as she tucks a strand of hair behind her ear with a nervous grin

The werewolf hasn't blushed since junior year, who tf is this girl

"pheobe," Enid breathes and oh hell no, the way Wednesday went from fingering her knife to full on grasping it has the rest of the gang looking at her

Safe to say Enid ditches them and Wednesday is left sulking at the table, glaring daggers at the back of the werewolf because what in the nine circles of hell is this!?

Enid's distracted the whole weekend after that and like okay, Wednesday understands, Enid can have friends but she misses her roommate like a man missing his lung. Everything is damn unbearable without her and so it's a relief when Monday comes around because Enid is studious, surely there is-

There's a college student introduced to them in biology class, said to be staying there for a week to figure out more about outcasts

Nevermore, ever so accepting and willing to bridge a gap between normies and outcasts accepted the offer off a student staying for a bit, absolutely ecstatic at this chance

Alright, normally wednesday wouldn't care until Enid freezes once again in the corner of her eyes.

Something drops in the seers gut and a horrible festering feeling churns

Yoko is out, having skipped the lesson so there is one empty seat next to the werewolf. Wednesday has no good reason to stab the teacher for their convoluted plan because it was simply understandable to put the new outlier in an empty seat

(she might spike their drink in pettyness however)

So Wednesday watches with a tight jaw as this normie went and slipped her hand into Enid's so easily that it left the watcher green with envy

"enid," tara says and she's looking at her roommate like she's the reason she lives. It's disgusting because wednesday recognizes it like it's her own face

"told you we'd meet again," enid chirps and she looks delighted. "I didn't expect it to be like this tho!"

It's another one, Wednesday thinks and her pen snaps in half.

[the-chorus-of-voices-collective]

I just saw a post that was something along the lines of-

This line of dialog "being gay/trans is unnatural!" And then the post saying in response 'you traumatized your child so regularly and severely that their identity fractured into 49 different parts'

The post ends with this 'no animal could ever come close to hurting a child like that'

This really. Really stuck with me. Cause their right. Animals run primarily on instinct and learned behaviors. However that instinct will never be to hurt their offspring the way humans hurt theirs. Animals do not have the urge to inflict unnecessary pain. Do some kill/eat their children from time to time? Yes I won't deny that. But it's not for their pleasure. They simply do it because it's the circle of life.

What I'm trying to say is that-i believe. Or I would hope because humans have already failed me.

I believe that an animal should they have been given our sentience and awareness they wouldn't inflict suffering on their young. I think they would cherish those little guys like children are meant to be. Those little guys wouldn't be subjected to anything close to what I or many others have been through. Because at their core I genuinely believe animals can only love.

Humans on the other hand. Are full of hatred and it sickens me.

Yknow my boyfriend texted me today. Half-dissociated and numb. Because his grandmother responded to a snarky comment by snatching, and ruining my boyfriends food. My boyfriend had to wrestle his food back. And feeling obvious frustration, he slammed the door of the microwave and subsequently got yelled at for it. He yelled back. He got hit for it. His aunt and his mother had to get between them because that grown ass woman was dead set on beating my boyfriend. Then proceeded to get bitchy and defensive when not given the fucking chance.

Why am I saying this? Why the fuck am I going on this long-winded rant. I may not even be making sense right now. None of you could have stopped and read this but that doesn't matter cause If one person hears me and processes what I'm trying to get across that's enough for me. If that person is myself? Well thats fine by me.

I hate the human race. I hate DID/OSDD and what had to happen for our community to have this disorder. Maybe not everyday is pain but I remember a time when it was.

20 headmates. 20 people living in our brain because mother couldn't stop fighting and screaming and couldn't ever seem to get to us when her now ex-husband got too angry and pushed me around like a rag doll. Said ex-husband being sure to employ graphic threats to my or my siblings safety when he felt he was being disrespected. Various fits of loud pointed cursing and throwing things around.

A child shouldn't fear being hit by someone who should love them. A child shouldn't expect someone who should love them to hit them.

Animals wouldn't hurt me like humans have. The worst my dog has ever done to me is hump my fucking leg before backing off with a bit of scolding.

The worst my parents have done to me is fracture my identity into 20 pieces because they were so hurt and broken they just couldn't help themselves to break me down to that state as well.

they didn't hear me when I screamed. When I screamed for help or just a scrap of love that wasn't imposing or codependent. They weren't there when I cried into the night wishing for death.

I was a scared little kid. And now I'm a traumatized and bitter teenager.

Who am I?

It depends.

But one thing is this. Animals? They wouldn't hurt me the way humans have. They wouldn't hurt you. They would take in or have children and love them because that's what you're supposed to do with children.

We didn't deserve what happened to us.

The animals know that.

(I was going to reblong the original post but unfortunately I had to refresh my screen and lost sight of it. Credit goes to the original poster)

[candiid-caniine]

Hello lovely! I hope you're doing good!♡ (Sorry if you don't wanna be called that!!)

I was wondering how you vch piercing is healing and all that. I really want to get this piercing but I want to see how it's like for someone who already has it. Yknow? Here's some questions:

Did it hurt really really bad or was it not that bad? For context I have a medium pain tolerance. Have you had any significant problems with it? Would you recommend this piercing to a friend? How much did it cost for you to get? I know price depends place to place ofc. How long do you feel it took to heal? If it has yet! And any pros or cons?

If you're not comfortable with answering I understand! Thank you for your time. I hope you have a beautiful wonderful day♡

(Can I perhaps be " 🎀🍓 " anon??)

awaaa hi yourself, lovely!! (absolutely <3 being called that ty for checking tho!!)

i'm not at all uncomfy with answering!! and ofc that can be your anon signoff <3

talk of piercing + piercing aftermath under the cut!

so, here's the DL on your VCH questions:

pain level: extremely minimal! the thing that hurt the worst was being clamped (which was a bad sign - i've learned since then that people who know their shit piercing VCH will use a receiving tube, not clamps, so ask your piercer about their process during a consultation appointment and then make your decision!) i have my nostril, 2 cartilage, 6 lobe, and a vertical labret piercing on my lip. of those piercings, the vch and lip hurt the least. there's no cartilage to go thru, and even though we think of the clit as a very sensitive area, the hood of it, when it's isolated, isn't super sensitive for most. your anatomy and your pain tolerance will differ, but as a piercing veteran, the vch was the least painful!

problems with it: unfortunately, my vch rejected about two months after it'd healed (y'all can fact check me on this, i'm guesstimating). i *don't* think it was necessarily inherent to the VCH; rejection can happen to anyone for various reasons, but (afaik) is more of a risk when a piercing is more surface-based, like an eyebrow piercing. what i think happened: i think my piercer placed it too low on my clit hood; the top ball should have been higher up. this, combined with a poor jewelry fit and, uh, the fact that that area gets a lot of friction...probably contributed to the rejection. i took it out once i noticed because i didn't want to tear. as i mentioned above, my piercer used a technique that is *not* considered best practice by genital piercing professionals. (she's an excellent piercer otherwise, i love her, but now i know genitals are not her strong suit.)

another problem: due to the friction (not necessarily me rubbing it, more so clothing, my spouse's pelvic bone, etc), the ball was constantly coming loose, prompting a frantic hunt in the bedsheets/my laundry basket for the missing piece...pain in the fucking ass, but i think it also depends on your anatomy!

something that *wasn't* a problem that i expected to be: i don't think it ever once got caught on anything. once or twice, i had a pube get sort of wound around it, but since i was touching it...all the time...soooo much >.> i usually noticed pretty quick lmaoooo

i would recommend this piercing (done well, taken good care of) to a friend wanting a little bling downstairs and a little extra stimulation!

mine cost $100. but it's common to cost more than that from genital-specialty piercers, and for good reasons; i think my piercer priced it reasonably (small town economy + again, she didn't do a *great* job) but expect to pay more. that said, never equate cost with quality: ask your piercer...

where they learned to do a VCH

their process (receiving tube vs. clamps)

if they have any photographs of completed VCHs they've done. to assess all these best practices, check Elaine Angel's website. she basically invented the best practices, and she has plenty of good and bad example piercings for most types of genital piercings!

it took ~2 weeks before i'd say it was fully healed. most piercers caution you to wait 4-6 weeks for full healing; my body (and what i consider "healed"), as well as my new piercing aftercare routine, are specific to me. but for most people, it's <6 weeks. the rejection didn't happen until after healing. as far as healing the piercing *hole*, after taking it out, i don't notice any difference; there's maybe a pock mark sort of thing, or dimple? but it's not a "hole" anymore. just a mark, and there's not any scarring or tissue that irritates my clitoris, given i took it out so fast!

pros!

if you have my specific kinks, you are not gonna want to wait to start touching yourself >.> you can browse through my #kinky mods tag (tagged on this post for easy access) for a play-by-play of how fucked up it got me lmao.

as in, even tho it ached, i touched that shit the second day (gently) and had the craziest ruined orgasm of my life.

there is really something to be said for the tiny, itty bitty piece of stimulation achieved by the barbell under your hood.

also really something to be said about the balls themselves sliding over your clit when you rub with your fingers ;-;

vibrator against the barbell = weirdest overstim in the world.

heals fast; lots of cool jewelry options out there; doesn't hurt very much [compared to my other piercings, ymmv].

cons:

can be expensive to get one that's done properly.

you do eventually stop being as sensitive to the new stimulation. however, most people just switch jewelry to change things up after awhile, so nbd.

that said, jewelry change can be a bitch. it's hard to do that shit on your clitoris. you may find yourself needing to go to your piercer for jewelry changes, but many piercers offer this service at cost of jewelry/even free of charge, depending.

if you lose a piece of your jewelry, you might cry. lol. keep backups on hand. (my piercer, bless her fucking heart, has incredible aftercare services - she will literally drive to the shop at 1 am if your jewelry falls in the toilet. yes, she gives her clients her personal cell number. bless up, J, you can't pierce a clit worth a damn but you love what you do!)

how do i say this,, u know how. a new piercing might sort of get crusty. esp if you don't clean it often (follow ur aftercare instructions! always!!!!!) but uh. my regular aftercare did not prepare me for the crust being *under* the clit hood. it wasn't much, and it came off when i downsized jewelry, but eugh. it should be minimal, anyway, but still, don't be surprised.

the swelling was mainly the thing, in the hours after i got it pierced, but it didn't hurt worse than, say, biting the inside of your cheek really hard when you're chomping down on food - just that sort of ache you get. honestly i've had worse clit pain in the aftermath of being clamped, tho.

hope this helped ;-; i know it was a lot but y'all know me, i tend to go ham on these general/educational/experience questions. you're following an autistic puppy, what'd you expect? <3

[jichanxo]

hey i'm back to be annoying about sensei fic i don't remember if you've talked about that before (i think you did), and also i'm afraid that it may be considered as a spoiler (?), but! how much of amasawa and itokura's story will you include here? (they are very important to me, your honour) (the potential of parallels to kwgm is here as well and everything)

never annoying! I’m enjoying writing my paragraphs of rambling, so thank you more under the cut again lol. spoilers for lost judgment and also my own fic i suppose lmao

this is kind of difficult to answer because I don’t want to overpromise anything… I am unfortunately a “fuck it we ball” writer which means I am not really used to planning anything at all really (which is why I write mostly oneshots. I usually write everything blind) and that means that while I have ideas about what I want to do, I can’t really say anything definitive until I feel out my plans more concretely…

for what it’s worth though, I’d be shocked if amasawa and itokura didn’t appear the most out of everyone (aside from yagami and kitakata), since the mrc is effectively the centrepiece of both plots: being the main reason kitakata and yagami see each other, and of course I’m going to try and make an altered version of the school story plot work here. I expect there’ll be more of them than kaito and sawa, certainly…

one of the planned major beats in the kuwagami plot is having yagami actually let kitakata in on the professor investigation and not just blow him off. he might think that kitakata will just get in the way, but he has to accept that kitakata’s interest in the investigation and care for his students is legitimate and valid! keeping him in the dark and ignoring how he feels is wrong! anyway. my point is, that to resolve this plot beat, it’s unavoidable to talk about itokura and the professor, so no matter how I end up getting there, itokura (and by extension amasawa) are going to be crucial. you’re right about the parallels angle too… gonna gnaw on that… gotta figure that out… kuwagami but if they were both girls and in highschool and more emotionally intelligent… the idea of kitakata and yagami being a mess and super lame while the kids in the club are much more put together? it’s just too funny to pass up on… I can already imagine itokura complaining to amasawa about how she wishes they would just grow up already.

amasawa and itokura are really great and I also like them a lot! there’s a lot of interesting stuff with them to grab onto, both with canon – yagami’s relationship to them both, and with new stuff – inventing new stuff for them with kitakata! itokura and kitakata especially feel like a surprisingly natural fit – kitakata who wants to make sure no student around him feels the way that kusumoto mitsuru did, and itokura who was estranged and pushed out of school by her peers… it’s a relationship that would be engaging and interesting to develop on both sides… I really can’t pass up on that… so thematically rich… I imagine their relationship rn as being kind of awkward and a little tense. they probably get along best when they’re talking (cough arguing cough) about mystery novels.

one of the things on my to-do list for sensei fic right now (aside from taking thorough notes on school stories and general editing) is definitely trying to feel out this relationship, in particular before yagami enters the picture (@/four-white-trees poked me about this ages ago. thank you!!) presumably kitakata doesn’t let all of that happen to itokura without trying to do something about it, right? and yet, he still fails. yagami’s intervention is the one that brings itokura back to school. hence why I imagine things between them being a little awkward… that shared history…

though I imagine that it piques kitakata’s interest that yagami succeeded where he’d previously failed. So yknow. This Too Is Kuwagami. A surefire way to make kitakata fall in love with you: 1. be hot 2. legitimately care about and take action for the wellbeing of students

anyway! while nothing is set in stone, that’s what I have in mind about amasawa and itokura right now… though most of it ended up being about itokura… there’s still a lot I gotta figure out, but I’m definitely looking forward to poking at them some more! Itokura’s attitude is going to be a lot of fun to write, and amasawa is always a delight, and I love having her be the voice of reason between kitakata and yagami when they’re being ridiculous lol. thank you for the ask o7

[getitoffyourchestofficial]

hi this is a lot im sorry. i love to say words and dump shit that upsets me with no real correlation. my bad /gen (genuine) (idk if you know tone indicators im sorry ough)

you dont really Have to cook up a proper response to this i just need to put it somewhere where i wont immediately get piles of advice that i cant use. i know its well-meaning but ultimately the whole situation is ou of anyones control

(also putting this 🎪 here so i can try to find it later)

im stuck in a sisyphean nightmare of a weekly cycle: i have a good day -> my mood skyrockets -> i have a bad day -> my mood plummets -> rinse and repeat. at this point i think it might be a mental condition bc something doesnt even really have to Ruin My Day, i just have to face a minor inconvenience and then suddenly im all doom-and-gloom depression for 3-5 business days before springing back up as if nothing ever happened to do it all again. my mom says i might have bpd or bipolar disorder (i always get the two confused) because she has it and we just havent seen anyone about it, mostly because we dont have the money to see any doctors most of the time. i also kinda dont wanna have either of them? not in like an asshole way but in a these-people-face-stigma-that-i-dont-know-if-i-can-emotionally-handle way. in a im already queer and fat and poor and disabled in multipled ways and overall unsavory to neurotypicals/cishets/Default Settings way. yknow

todays inciting incident was a shitty shitty halloween carnival that didnt even have the thing i was excited for, didnt have any food, had lines that were miles long (hyperbole), was too hot, and i only got 8 shitty halloween things from -- half of which were lollipops, with half of those just being the same 2 flavors but Again. we stayed for 2 hours before my mom decided she didnt wanna be out of the house anymore as usual. i cant be too mad at her because shes mentally ill in the direction of "i dont want to go anywhere because my anxiety will spike" but unfortunately im mentally ill in the direction of "if i cannot leave the house to Do Things at my own pace at least once a week i will fall into a deep depression" so we clash pretty bad most of the time. this was also following multiple minor inconveniences mind you. and was also trailed by multiple minor inconveniences. it just has not gone well. this halloween is just shaping up to suck bc i was supposed to have a whole party but we had money issues so it had to be cut down to just 2 people for a sleepover, then one of them went out to see his grandma in another state and the other is apparently in the fucking hospital right now??? at least according to his posts. and i cant blame them for these either! schedules conflict and sometimes you go to the Fuckig Hosital. its out of anyones control but it still feels like shit. so its looking like my only shot at having any fun this halloween is the trunk-or-treat at my school and idk if im even allowed to go bc i had to drop out for mental health reasons and they told me i wasnt allowed on school grounds anymore. idk if that applies here. which btw. way to make a depressed kid feel worse. you can NEVER come to this high school again or we'll ARREST YOU. fuckin bullshit. BUT thats off topic the synopsis is that this halloween sucks so far and i dont really expect it to get better which extra sucks bc im turning 18 next year and i dont wanna let this be the last hurrah for my number one favorite holiday. i cant host fucking parties for my friends after then. im gonna be busy trying to fuck off to the other end of the country. i wont have TIME for it. idk. it sucks. this sucks. fuck art and fuck you /ref (reference) /nbh (nobody here)

Ik you don't want advice for this so I'll just put it on the blog.

And idk if you want it but here's a tea

☕

[team-council-two]

hi hello :D hope y’all are having a wonderful day-

thank you so much for making this blog because holy shit it’s gonna be so helpful <3

how do you say “Jesus Christ” in French ? context being it’s an exasperated exclamation

1. Many thanks - Aschen

Always happy to help! Now shower us with prompts and questions :) - Ray

Aw hey, thanks a ton - Cosmas

alpha here !! have a nice day too ! Personally, I'm glad you think this'll be useful. I just hope you and other people alike will be ready for how fuckin utterly disgustingly verbose I am, as expected of the person of this blog assuming authority on questions regarding spy (and perhaps what little scout could hope to have of french), and I am wishing you to manage to extract some glimpses of useful informations from my endless blabber still. (i also would like to apologise for my... sporadic use of ' and caps. i unfortunately have spent a good part of my life imitating dave strider's typing style, for i am the mandatory homestuck fan per project.)

onto the point !

well, what a simple yet interesting question, which yet easily unfolds into quite the lot of considerations to ponder !

so see, i am already forced to explain a little french thing known as our special relationship with religion, or as i fondly call it, our hellbentness on loudly frothing at the mouth whenever the church and catholicism is mentionned and our tendency to enjoy concepts such as the guillautine and the séparation de l'état et de l'église (chuch state separation for you English speaking friends)

This love for our république and révolution influenced us culturally a lot. In short; we do not refer to god for much or anything, including for the use religion based cusses, simply because we were hellbent on removing the catholic church from as much of our life as possible. It wasnt just royalty ! (we had a toast in the honor of the english queens death btw). But, because there always is a but, these cusses and the like still exist in french, and Spy is still someone who lives around americans a lot. so im assuming hed do the same as me, aka pick up a lot of language habits that youd usually not develop as much. this DOES include using religious based speech despite it all. A common consequence is, even if you don't say oh mon dieu/mon dieu a lot usually, well… Live long enough in America, and you will. But, because of course, there's always a but ! we do this because they have strikingly similar connotations ! Both can be used for surprise, fear and exhaustion alike. So. Let me actually answer this.

First, Jésus Christ is how you say it in french but it's pronounced completely different, like jeh-zus creest. Second, that said its not one i'd quite use interchangeably, at least for this case. You see, not only it sounds awkward as fuck in French and would be a real tongue twister to say in the middle of an English sentence (Ray's post on switching from Russian to English being hard also applies to French), it also would be that French uses this one a bit more restrictively : it's a thing you say more for surprising situations rather than quite exhaustion. We can but it's not our first choice. (also, on a side note, doux Jésus, lit. sweet jesus, is precisely for pleasant surprises too, as well as fear bound surprise. On a similar vein, the exclamation "Jesus !" will more often than not be better translated by "Christ !", but it really is. um. a nun/old time thing. It really is not common.)

Ironically mon dieu/bon dieu would likely be more fitting, bon sang (bloody hell ? Except that it's just. literally good blood.) but only if you follow it with a full mocking sentence like "bon sang, you are so fucking stupid it baffles me !…" or something like "bon sang, mais c'est quoi ce bordel ?" for full on, jesus christ what is this shit ? yknow. you even can use bon sang de bon soir. This whole thing reads as much more firm and almost angry compared to what you want, likely, tho. The absolute fucking peak of tired exhaustion, which is what I assume you're going for ? a standalone "mon Dieu mon Dieu mon Dieu mon Dieu…" Complete with head shaking and rubbing your temples. Bonus for being a classic movie reference (le grand restaurant, any Louis de Funès fan here ? he might pop up a lot in what i refer to). "Doux Jésus de doux Jésus de doux Jésus…" also works the same, minus the cool reference. A good ole "oh putain" for when you realize sth is going fucky is good too, the classic "merde/et merde" also is commonly adviseable.

There are many options because despite Ray's insistance that French cussing is weak compared to Russian one, we do have an entire art of cussing a lot, cussing in specific ways and cussing in stupid and artful ways. please do not hesitate to provide more context and/or the paragraph in which this pops up. but overall ? since your audience will be in its majority either american, or french people used enough to american english, i wouldnt worry too much about jésus christ not being understood or noticed as an "error" despite its use being a tiny tiny bit different. This is overall nitpick. but hey ! Guess that's what we are here for.

[rainy-astrology]

thats what baffles me about this whole life thing that we have to unfortunately force ourselves to endure even if we dont want to admit it we are slaves to the broken system. there is so much that we can or should be doing but at the end of it it dont matter once we pass away cause then u be a no body yknow. no one on earth can really say when but i wanna know when... idrc for the whole life is short yolo shtick that was a saying in the mid 00s or whenever. theres only so much u can realistically achieve and if u fail as i have then whats the point in sticking around? why is there no exit button cause i dont want to stick around past the age of 50? the state the world and countries are in is dreadful. people on here are still timid to talk about death but we cant avoid the subject.

Hi anon, are you alright? You sound very stressed and depressed. This is some pretty negative thinking...Especially if you're asking about death and not wanting to live long. "If you fail as I have then whats the point of sticking around?" I'm guessing you base your self worth on success and you haven't met your expectations/goals, so you're already considering yourself a failure and want to quit. You're under 50, so you're still young (and even if you were 50 or older, age can't stop you from reaching your goals) and have plenty of time to achieve all of the things you want. Yes we will all die in the end, but that doesn't mean you should spend the rest of your time doing nothing and being negative. That's a sad way to live. It's also not a reason to want to leave early... There must be something else in this world that you want to live for.

Is there nothing or nobody you value? Life is about the small things too...it's about the people you are with too...do you really want to quit and leave those behind? Even if you don't think you have either, surely you do. Think about it. Reflect deeply. Even if you think you will be insignificant after your death, you will matter to those you're close to, to people you have impacted and care about. I'm sure there's someone who cares about you. The world may not know you, but why do you care about people you don't even personally know.

You can still be successful no matter how many times you've failed. Isn't that what life is? A series of trials and lessons, learning experiences? You don't have to beat yourself up so much over your mistakes and failures. Learn from them, grow from them.

But I get what you're saying though, I think about it a lot actually. The world is in an incredibly depressing state and just seems to get worse each passing minute. Sometimes it does feel like our efforts amount to nothing, especially since we'll die anyway. We really can be doing so much more and run the world in a much different, better way yet we somehow chose some miserable ways...It's completely understandable. I also especially understand with the failure part, but we can't let that eat us up y'know. We only truly fail when we give up completely.

I know you didn't come to me to get some motivational speech or whatever, but I do not want you to wallow in your own sadness. It's ok to be sad and to be depressed, but you shouldn't give up either.

Decided to put your other ask in here as well

Yeah I'm sorry I didn't really have much of an answer for your 1st ask.

Certain times? Like birth times? I don't think there's much to it, it just happens to be the time we're born at. The placements are based on the degree and coordinates of the stars and such at the time iirc.

No, I don't think it does. Nothing in your birth chart or astrology is set in stone. It is simply a guide to help you learn about yourself and what you may want in life, the lessons and experiences you may go through. Plus depending on the type of chart system and astrology system you use, one chart can mean one thing while the other says something else (but there should likely be an overlapping theme between the charts). It's all up to you to make the action and effort to build your own path and life.

[rotshop]

*manifests from a pile of shoes*

Could I request head-canons w/ Sanford and Sheriff for a Mag!S/o that kinda looks like siren head?

*re-enters the shoe pile*

-Boot/👢Anon

AUGH ok . ok so. so. um. uh. alright. uhm. i MIGHT have changed a few lil things here and there just so its a LIL easier 4 me ,,, sorry if this isn't what u wanted and if its a little short [runs away crying like an anime girl] /j

TW ; violence / fighting / some gore (?, not heavily detailed, briefly mentioned), injuries / gashes

Sanford

-im going to be completely honest ,you terrified him at first. LIKE. OK. sanford gets scared sometimes. he gets anxious and nervous. but seeing you crawl out and scream some deafeningly loud siren / radio static / etc was one of the moments he was genuinely petrified.

-chances are you came out when he was getting his ass kicked by some soldats / another mag. you felt some sort of pity for him (that or you just wanted a fight / them out of your area) so!!! you step in and start raising hell. it's too hard for soldats to properly shoot at you when they can barely see straight with the noise you're making and that mag has no chance to fight when you're already tearing them in two

-the entire time he's just laying there in shock as he watches you turn agents into unidentifiable masses like its nothing . he doesn't even think to like, run or hide because his brain is just barely processing anything going on at that very moment

-eventually you turn to him and INSTANTLY he goes 'oh shit' and tries to make a run for it before you cut him off by grabbing him and dragging him back. he tries to kick at you or try to (even though he knows DAMN well it wontwork) yell at you in some attempt to scare you off and obviously!! it doesn't work. instead of trning him into mystery meat though you instead just kinda. throw him over your shoulder and start walking???? ur tall as fuck so its !! not super funsies especially when u got blood loss status effect

-after a while you kinda (gently, a surprise to him) drop him down on the ground and go to look for something in some pile of boxes and debris. he KNOWS he should try running for it but he just?? cant??? something just kinda. tells him not to. you end up coming back before he can think better of it and you just??? grab his injured leg and start to try and wrap some gashes up??????

-thus is the start of a rlly weird friendship. he PROLLY cant bring u back to base (unfortunately :[ ) BUT he visits you real often. the other three all just kinda look at each other whenever sanfords super chipper and excited to go on some little 'mission' by himself. chances are he slips on his excuses one time and mentions u and they all just collectively go 'Who.' he (VERY reluctantly) introduces them to you, deimos screamed the second you crouched under an exit to walk outside

-they get used 2 u tho dw

-he LOVES fighting with you, people are fucking HORRIFED the second you walk in purely bc ur a gd powerhouse (and. yknow. for the more obvious reaosns too) which leaves them with a perfect blindspot for him to take advantage of. unfortunately tho agents are mean and homophobic so chances are they do say some shit that gets to you sometimes, this usually leads to him comforting you

-it's usually just you kind crouching and / or leaning way down while he kinda. pep talks you???r3 fhejvedD??? "listen, those aahw fucks don't know a single goddamn thing about you, I do though and I can say with 100% certainty you ain't just some kinda monster or sumn..you mean a lot to me, I care about you, ok?"

-also he acts huffy whenever you hold him but he secretly rlly enjoys it. chances are he struggles with kissing u bc ur just so damn tall !! however this leads to a system where he just kinda. taps on your leg or something so you lean down so he can kiss you

-i may have gotten a little caried away here. woops.

Sheriff

-aahw gave him you bc he asked for some kinda backup / a bodyguard and WHOO boy. yeah. yeah,,,,,,, /derogatory

-you ALSO scared him at first, as in him going completely silent and being squeaky whenever he does have to talk around you. (it's that one 'pov ur just a little hater' 'and?' pic but he's sobbing and shaking /j)

-it takes some raid where hank has him cornered for him to kinda come to his senses. he FULLY expected to drop dead when he seen the barrel of that gun pointed at his head until you fucking grab hank like a ragdoll and- do something. Sheriff squeezes his eyes shut before he can really see, all he can hear is popping and squelching and honestly!! that's all he cares to really hear!! he's good on not getting a visual. he's forced to open his eyes though when you're crouching down next to him and inspecting him for any injuries or anything like that with a surprising amount of gentleness

-it's just as bad afterwards but just in a new way. now he's always following you around like a lost puppy and staring at you. its. yeah. anytime you ask he always jumps and then stammers out some lame excuse (most times it does get him to go back to his office tho bc he completely falls apart hwen u point out how it doesn't make any sense)

-he tries?? showing off in front of you??? almost got his shit wrecked trying to show off his shot skill before you kinda yanked him out of the way and dealt with the bandits urself. he just kinda goes tense in ur hold before relaxing cus u've got him against ur torso / kinda on ur hip (?? if that makes sense) and he's just. 'aha :flushed:'

-you both cause chaos and problems on purpose, he does a lot of the distant shots or anyone who tries getting to ur blindspots / ones u dont notice, u do the same for him and most of the dirty work

-if you ever get injured he makes you lay down so he can help you out, huffs and fusses over you the entire time, scolds you (very gently) because!! what if you got seriously hurt >:[ !!! its ok tho because he gives you a kiss as an apology of sorts lol

-LOVES having you stand by him and seeing how people are obviously intimidated (he likes to think they're intimidated by the both of you but like. its very obviously just u making them nervous lol)

-also will kick a motherfuckers ass if they ever say some hurtful shit to you, YEAH he might be a coward and flighty but if someone treats you like that they're asking for it and just fucked w/ you AND him personally so!! :) /th