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showtoonzfan · 10 months

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Now that the episode is out officially, here’s my rant review of Oops!

PROS:

- Fizz and Ozzie were adorable and I honestly love them. Despite the sex jokes, you can tell they love each other for who they are OUTSIDE of sex. While I did wish we would have seen more, (like how Ozzie took him in and fell in love) they’re still adorable to watch. They’re the better version of Stolitz, can the show be about them instead?

- Brandon’s voice acting holy shit, he really knows how to sound like he’s in tears or is broken. As much as I hate the character and feel no sympathy, he displayed genuine and broken emotion very well.

- Alex Brightman Alex Brightman

Okay that’s it. Moving on to the Cons. Bear with me, it’s a lot and I go back and forth a bit. 😭

CONS:

So for a quick short summary, this episode:

- Once again puts more focus on the filler plot rather than actually focusing on the relationships between the characters, so all we're left with is a 10 second clip of Fizz being burned while the rest of the episode is surrounded on sex jokes/petty bickering and Stolas and Ozzie sitting around.

- Completely erases what made Blitz and Fizz's dynamic interesting in the first place because it retcons it with a dumb miscommunication trope about how Fizz actually wanted to see Blitz and Blitz tried reaching out to him. Not only does this feel like a cheap attempt to make Blitz out to be sweet/sympathetic and NOT the one in the wrong so Fizz can suck up to him, but this also makes no sense within the narrative.

- Has Fizz forgive Blitz despite him being the last person anyone would think would forgive him. (So honestly ruins Fizz himself because it turned him into a soft boy who's forgiving compared to the asshole he was in Ozzie's) All because Viv would sell her whole soul before she even remotely considers painting characters like Blitz and Stolas out to be the one's in the wrong.

- Takes Stolas out of the hospital completely, erasing all the drama/tension Western Energy had and proves that that episode was utterly pointless.

- Turns Striker from an interesting complex villain to a Saturday morning cartoon goon.

- Proves to us that Crimson is just a flat tool and gives us more prove that the world building rules Viv set up in season 1 legit don't matter.

-Ruins Blitz/Barbie's feud now because now you're making Barbie look like the one in the wrong since the fire was an accident. God forbid a female characters emotions in this show are justified.

But if you want my more in depth rants, it’s under the cut! (There’s a lot so bear with me lol)

- As usual WAAY too many sex jokes and swearing. It gets annoying and repetitive at times and some of them distract from the main plot. There’s a long and I mean LONNG dragged out joke of Fizz talking about Ozzie’s dick, then later saying he’s hard when Striker has a gun to his head, as well as Blitz making a joke about him and Fizz making out once they hug. Again, Viv can’t be serious for 2 seconds without an unfunny shitty gag. I genuinely wonder if Hazbin is ganna be like this, where a character is in a life threatening situation or a deep dark serious scene happens only for the next scene to be sex related.

- This is one of those “shit happens because the plot demands it” and it shows. Crimson and Striker COINCIDENTLY meet up with each other, and Fizz and Blitz just so HAPPEN to be in the same exact area they are. Viv wonders why we call her shit a fanfic and this is what we mean, when she creates wild wacky plots and focuses more on THAT rather than the actual character writing. This entire episode hinges on a useless poorly last minute planned kidnapping plot that didn’t need to happen. Also way to once again make the characters idiots so the plot can happen, cause Fizz KNOWS Ozzie worries for him and that the Greed Ring is dangerous, yet purposefully puts the spotlight on him.

- Stolas did NOT need to be in this episode. The plot completely ignores the fact that he was in the hospital the last time we saw him, and he’s only here for Stolitz banter. You’d think that a character admitting they have feelings for someone would be a big deal but he just flat out says it and it’s so underwhelming and feels half assed with no weight to it. Fan comics have made more dedication to this than Viv has. We're supposed to believe him too despite the show failing to actually SHOW us this. Same for Blitz ranting about how “nice” Stolas has been to him, laughing at his jokes and liking his posts…hey Viv, can we actually SEE that on screen so it’s more believable? Or are you only determined to show them sexually flirting? 😑

- Once again Viv felt the need to shove a B plot into this episode and this one sucks because it’s just two characters sitting and doing fucking nothing. It felt like Viv had no idea what to do with Stolas and Ozzie, and I refuse to believe that Ozzie just sat there knowing Fizz was in danger. If anything he would have said “fuck the paperwork” and went to save Fizz himself. Way to show that gif of Ozzie getting mad as a sneak peak to get fans excited, only to see that Ozzie spends the rest of the episode sitting in a dark room LMAO what a let down.

- Ozzie is weirdly chill and cool with Stolas and it’s something I don’t get. While he did say that Stolas had the real “spirit of Lust” in S1E7, it still gave you the impression that he was also more poking fun at Stolas rather than respecting him. The whole point of House of Asmodeous was that Ozzie outs him and publicly embarrassed him. Stolas literally was intimidated just by Asmodeous’s mere name, and hid his face around him. It seemed like Stolas certainly didn’t want someone like Ozzie to know about his private life especially since they’re both part of the Ars Goetia. Now here Ozzie is just cool with him and it feels like a missed opportunity for their dynamic.

- Stolas confessing his feelings about Blitz also makes…no sense narrative wise. I thought the whole point of The Circus and the ending to Western Energy was that he was realizing that Blitz didn’t like him that way and was finally waking up. I thought that’s why he was doing this whole crystal deal in the first place, so he can let Blitz go, yet the show keeps flip flopping and insisting that these two love each other and are good for each other. It’s really making you realize how this season and the previous stuff set up is becoming nonsense because the writers retcon EVERY damn episode. Also….why the hell is Stolas telling Ozzie his feelings for Blitz? Out of all people, why is it Ozzie, the person who outed Stolas and embarrassed him. Why is Stolas even respectful of Ozzie? He has no reason to, and he’s not under the impression that he’s dating Fizz either. I get that he needs the crystal but mentioning his love for Blitz makes no sense.

- Striker and Crimson teaming up to kidnap Blitz and Fizz was such an ass puller last minute decision. It feels overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time, more because it feels like Viv has no idea what to do with these two villain characters other than give them something evil to do to start the plot. Also…why…are they working together? It feels so random.

- Striker’s character especially is all over the place. First he’s working for Stella, then he’s painted as the best assassin in hell, and now he’s…looking for more work I guess and working for Crimson? Why? Does this guy even have a motive anymore? It feels like his character is just dangling around until Viv wants to use him for another wattpad kidnap plot and it ESPECIALLY shows when Striker escapes for the THIRD fucking time. Can this character/storyline actually GO somewhere or are you just going to keep introducing him and have him run away. 🤦🏽‍♀️

— How did Crimson not know who Striker is despite him being labeled as “the most popular assassin in hell”, and how the hell does Crimson know Ozzie and know all the information about him being in a relationship with Fizz?? Oh right because we needed the plot to happen somehow. Still, even if Crimson did know that Ozzie was the "weakest" and loved Fizz, (which….what about Beezlebub?)) he still should have known he was playing with fire. I get that he's supposed to be evil and intimidating but how could he have predicted that Ozzie would actually stand down and fill out the paperwork? He could have immediately came there and killed Crimson for all he knew. It's just distracting how..not planned this shit was.

- Fuck this episode for calling Striker a supremacist. It makes no sense?? Viv is trying SO hard to villainize him despite him being the one in the right and it pisses me off. He has every right to be mad at the upper class, he’s part of the lower class that we’re said Hell takes advantage of, but god forbid we call out Rich and powerful Stolas because that would mean he’s a b-bad person and we can’t have that complex morality! This is so not a “eat the rich” story and it shows bc Vivzie is rich as hell. Striker as a character deserves so much better man. Congrats writers, you had an interesting character and motive set up for him, now he’s nothing but a silly goon that you might as well kill off already cause you clearly don’t care about him. Crimson meanwhile is just a piece of paper, a boring plot device I could give less of a shit about. I thought his motive was to go after Moxxie, now he’s just doing fuck whatever because this show desperately wants a bad guy for their filler fanfic plots.

- We get more world building issues, Ozzie and Fizz are so determined to hide their relationship for obvious reasons, but then at the end of the episode just say “fuck it, no one would dare tell anyway”. So now they’re being open about their relationship and lmao I told y’all the newspaper scene of Ozzie being called out for being a hypocrite wouldn’t go anywhere. Even if Ozzie did threaten his workers to not tell, they can’t be so sure that someone wouldn’t see or snitch, it’s kinda a retcon too cause they were pretty lovey dovey in Ozzie’s. Still, it makes the characters look dumb and it makes the rules Viv set up for Hell once again not mean anything.

- We finally get to see Fizz’s backstory in action and it’s executed in the most underwhelming way possible. It’s literally a fucking 10 second clip of what went down, and rather than experiencing the event for ourselves, it’s in flashback mode but with Fizz’s voice talking over it. That’s it. I’ve seen fan comics/fanart that built this shit up better than Viv did, that actually took the slow time and dedication it needed, and here it feels like such an afterthought, like Viv could care less. Maybe if this actually was a character driven show like Viv claims, Stolas, Striker, and Crimson would be taken out of the picture and then that would leave us with PLENTY time to actually explore and develop Blitz/Fizz, bc most of this episode is just them pettily bickering and Stolas and Ozzie sitting around. But nah, we gatta have our fanfic kidnapping plot. Same goes for the reveal of Blitzo’s mom dying in the same fire. Glad to know that she got the same treatment Moxxie’s mom did, where we don’t even know her and yet we’re supposed to feel moved and care about her death. You nailed that one Viv. 👍

- I predicted that this episode would victimize Blitz and have the fire incident be an accident, (because Viv is a pussy writer and can’t make her characters actually do bad things like god forbid) but I never thought they’d actually have the balls to have Fizz forgive Blitz immediately in the same episode and pull the “actually turns out that horrible thing you did to me helped me in a way”- trope. Biggest flaw of the episode, fuck you Viv. I was actually going to applaud Blitz for taking accountability, but then the dialogue reminds you that an abuser wrote this, and he shifts his apology to “okay but I lost something too see so it’s not all about you” as if he’s fucking dismissing Fizz’s trauma and making it about himself. “I love flawed characters” my fucking ass. I would have smacked a bitch if I was Fizz because Blitzo loosing his mother in the fire too isn’t an excuse?? Fizz lost his fucking ARMS AND LEGS, and at the end of the day Blitzo STILL KNEW HE WAS HELPLESS IN THE FIRE BUT LEFT HIM BEHIND. He could have gotten help and came back, but didn’t. If this were a good show Fizz would have threw that apology back in Blitzo’s face and said “I don’t care if it was an accident or not, you still left me there and then proceeded to loathe me for years”. This is why Helluva will never be Bojack cause at least characters in that show who got treated horribly by him knew when to say “no, fuck you.”

- The episode retcons again, this time they make it out to be that Blitz TRIED contacting Fizz the years they were apart but no one would let him see him. Then they say that Fizz actually WANTED to see Blitz but assumed he didn’t want to, so their entire feud was solely because of miscommunication?? Number one, show don’t fucking tell omg. And number two, that makes ZERO sense. Blitz talked badly about Fizz in Loo Loo Land, and when they finally reunited in Ozzie’s, it was clear they fucking loathed each other. You got the impression that Blitz was petty and jealous just because Fizz was more popular, and Fizz not only loathed him for the accident, but liked to rub in his face about how much of a big shot he was. They literally do that in this episode too, so the episode is literally contradicting itself. Blitz and Fizz had multiple chances to meet up with each other, you can’t just say “oh they couldn’t because no one would let them”- So which is it? Did they hate each other because of bad blood, petty drama, or that they thought the other didn’t want to see them? Pick ONE Viv and stick to it, but she never does. Their feud was interesting and now you ruined it just to have some sweet happy ending. “Adult mature show” my ass lol.

-Bottom line is Fizz shouldn’t have forgave Blitz so easily, or forgave him period. I find it funny how he says “it’s hard to just forgive you” and then he literally does lol. I feel so bad for Fizz fans, him and Blitz’s feud was honestly interesting, so to see all of this go down in a half-assed piss poor way as if this was Care Bears is….wow. The fan interpretations had more thought and care put into this storyline but what else is new lol.

- I’m really tired of these shitty annoying songs. If you’re going to get Broadway actors, please put effort into your songwriting and actually have them sing something good, not something that’s literally nonsense. This Fizz song sounds like it took less than a minute to write and Sam Haft was just thinking of anything he could think of at the top of his head. Also Why the fuck are Striker and Crimson just STANDING there while Fizz sings. They look like idiots, just SHOOT them omg. If this were a funny show, Fizz would have started his first note and Crimson just rolls his eyes and pulls his gun out.

- Fizz and Ozzie kill the lawyer but not…Crimson? Despite Fizz knowing what ring he’s in and even Ozzie knowing what he looks like? Same for Blitz, he doesn’t try to make sure Striker is dead. I get that the plot demands for these two to still be around, but there’s a way to keep them alive without making the main characters look like fucking idiots. Also Stolas just leaves without doing or contributing anything to the plot yay.

- Fizz: “Let him have it, you could say he’s earned it”— Uhm….Nope. Blitz did NOT earn shit. He didn’t even earn Fizz’s forgiveness. Last time I checked, the moment Blitz cried and said it was an accident, Fizz forgave him, knowing he didn’t mean it. What effort did Blitz do to “earn” that as well as the crystal? Because he saved Fizz and didn’t leave him behind for the SECOND time near the end?? Cause if so than the bar is extremely low. That’s the bare minimum, just because Blitz cried and felt bad about it doesn’t mean he should be let off the hook Viv. I hate this so much, what a shitty conclusion, it feels forced just so Blitz can have the crystal and just so the writers can once again paint him as the one in the right. It’s almost insulting that they make it seem like Fizz was in the wrong for assuming Blitz starting the fire too, same for Barbie.

God what a shitty day it is to be a Fizz fan, I’m sorry. The episode did NOT do him justice. Fizzarolli deserved better than that half assed gaslighting apology for someone who lost their arms and legs man, and I’m tired of the show letting every character suck up to Blitz and Stolas for their horrible treatment just because they feel bad. Not only that but the episode (as most recent HB episodes) was a huge time waster. Everyone was really hoping for an in depth walkthrough of his character/backstory but again, when he’s not with Ozzie, the rest/most of his screen time is dedicated to him being helpless and pointlessly arguing with Blitz, plus a long dragged out nonsense song that didn’t need to happen. It felt like SO much time was wasted when we could have used the runtime we have to dive deeper and see more, like….again it would have been nice to see Fizz’s life AFTER the accident and how he became well known as well as how he fell in love with Ozzie, but his backstory is briefly scratched upon in a single scene and that’s it, all because Viv wanted this filler plot and wanted to dedicate more time to THAT rather than actual character expansion/development, something we could have got had you took out Stolas and Ozzie’s B plot and Striker and Crimson.

Viv is so on her way to murder/ruin every character that isn’t Blitz and Stolas and I won’t be here to watch further. I’ll check out the Mammon music video thing but that’s it man, this show is going off the rails, Adding Fizz to the character adoption list!

#vivziepop critical #spindlehorse critical #helluva boss critical #helluva boss critique #helluva boss criticism #helluva critical #anti vivziepop #helluva boss #fizzaroiii #fizzaroli helluva boss #helluva boss oops #helluva boss review #vivziepop criticism

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the-dumpster-fire-of-life · 6 months

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Can you write a Platonic fic for the characters?

If so may I request the school bus graveyard characters and an older sibling like reader

(Of course! Enjoy!)

Older Sibling-Like Reader

Aiden

This man is literally never leaving you alone

There are pros and cons with being a comfort place for Aiden

But to get something straight Aiden is definitely kept in line by you

All is takes is one look and he is definitely knowing he's gonna get an ear full

But knowing him, he keeps going

It’s Aiden, for god's sake

He is kinda bummed in his own mind on how you’re not actually his blood related sibling

He could have used you a whole lot when he was going through stuff growing up

He thinks you would have made it a little better

But he’s happy he now knows you and that you’re his unofficial sibling now

Against your will of course

He’s the annoying little brother for sure

Your friends are now his friends and his friends are definitely your friends

It’s a given

He is always dragging you into all his shit so of course when stuff is happening with those fucking demons man you are right there with him

You have literally no escape from this man

The sibling to just come into your room, mess with your hit, check himself out in the mirror, push your phone into your face and walk out

Ben

He is more subtly protective of the people he loves

Especially when that fight went down when Logan was trying to help out that kid

He values you a lot even if he physically cannot say it

He is always subconsciously next to you because he finds your aura a bit comforting

Especially because you took on that older sibling role

He’s taller, people find him intimidating so he never really had anyone be the one to comfort him or to be the one that treated him like how you do

It was something new for him and he turned out to really like it

He doesn’t say it out loud but he does love and care for you

He would literally fight to hell and back for you, anyone he loves he would but you especially

In the dream world place shit he is definitely by your and Aiden's side the whole time

Gotta protect his honorary siblings

He may not show it but he loves when you treat him like a casual younger sibling

Even if its sibling arguing or fighting he loves being treated like a blood related sibling by you

He finds it comforting

He likes little things like that

He needs an older sibling so bad bro cause like what??

Logan

YOU BETTER STICK UP FOR HIS ASS

If you were friends from before that field trip happened you better have stuck up for him

But even if you werent and you found out that shit was going down??

That was when Logan actually started thinking of you as an older sibling like person to him

Just the way you got mad, showed you cared and comforted him and how you went up to go pick a fight because you got ticked off about how he got treated

It was nice to know somebody cared about him in that way

He doesn’t really have anyone like that to do that shit for him

He’s always been kind of alone in that department so for you to step in and help him like that?

It was refreshing in a way and he doesn’t want to lose that

And it just was a bit jarring to him at how much you cared

If you do small things like do sibling like picking on him, or protecting him, or ruffling his hair, messing up his shit playfully and stuff like that

He may pretend to get annoyed but he does find it fun and will do it back to yo

People look at you guys and just from how you act are shocked at how y’all are not in any way related

He does wish you guys were

His life would be a lot better if you were his older sibling, he thinks

Tyler

He’s the stereotypical “I don’t care!” and “I don’t need it!” type of person to anyone else but to Taylor and you?

He’s different towards his siblings

It was just very natural in a way when you somehow became that older sibling like role for him

He was somewhat relieved he didn’t have to hold the entire older sibling burden on his shoulders anymore

He may appear to not need the help or want that type or care for himself but let me tell you something

He needs it, and he probably secretly craves it

He’s always been the stronger one, even if he is a twin he felt he needed to be that for Taylor because if not him who else?

And all older siblings know that burden

So he may not show it but he definitely finds a bit of comfort and solace in you being that for him

He won’t break down, he won’t do what other people might do to show they appreciate it, or he may not even really speak on it

But he shows he does in little actions like protecting you, checking up on you and helping you in ways he would only usually help Taylor in

He does need that older sibling care though because mans is probably gonna have a breakdown

In the hospital scene he ran to both you and Taylor and you guys were the only thing on his mind as he kept running

That was probably the tightest hug you have ever gotten from him

Everyone probably thought he was going to you guys to comfort y’all or that he was worried about you guys

Don't get me wrong, he was both those things

But he was also terrified and holding onto you, his older sibling, because he needed your comfort then

Taylor

She really appreciates you

She loves having older siblings

She may not really like the cons that come with being treated like the baby of the family or being younger but she loves having the comfort of older siblings

It’s like a blanket and safety net she can’t describe to anyone else

She may have only started out with Tyler but she somehow found you along the way and she has never been more happy

She is very protective over her siblings also

Even if you’re not biologically her sibling she is just the same with you

She’s always happy to be around you, to annoy you and even in the bad times

In the dream like hell you guys go to everyday at night she always is around either you or Tyler

You guys bring her a comfort she can’t describe but a comfort she always wants to be around

She is terrified of you guys getting hurt, especially after what happened to Tyler

She sometimes forgets you’re not biologically her sibling

But does she care??

No. She does not care one bit.

Ashley

It may have taken some time for Ash to even be comfortable or even acknowledge how she feels like you’re an older sibling to her

She’s an only child so she’s never experienced a sibling-like bond before

So to have you appear in her life so suddenly caught her off guard

Especially with how you showed you cared, or how you treated her like someone would treat their sibling

But she actually liked it

She gravitated towards it when she got more comfortable with the thought or when she needed it

Especially when shit gets hard in the hell you guys are all forced into at night

She likes that you have her back and she has yours

It’s a protective thing she loves

And like Tyler she is happy to not have to hold the entire burden of everything just because she’s older

Her parents more likely like you as well just because f how much their daughter does

Ash has you over a lot, everyone else as well, so much so your stuff probably is around her room a lot

Ash may not be used to having an older sibling to go to but when she does?

She can’t help but like it

It’s a foreign comfort to her

But she likes it, a lot

#logan school bus graveyard #tyler school bus graveyard #ashlyn school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #school bus graveyard #sbg ashlyn #sbg tyler #taylor sbg #sbg aiden #aslyn sbg x reader #sbg x reader #aiden sbg #aiden school bus graveyard #aiden sbg x reader #logan sbg x reader #ben sbg x reader #taylor sbg x reader #tyler sbg x reader #school bus graveyard x reader

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tainsan · 10 months

Text

misfits IX

⇥ pairing: ot8 ateez x fem! reader

⇥ warnings: physical fights, anxiety, depression, mentions of suicide, mentions of blood, character death, suicidal thoughts and intentions

⇥ word count: 7.2k

⇥ a/n: in this chapter it may be very triggering to those who have gone through abusive, suicidal, life threatning situations. read with care please. i love you all!

⇢ masterlist ⇠

previous chapter ⇠ ⇢ next chapter

--- THIS IS AN 18+ FANFICTION MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ---

Making your way towards school, a sense of unease settles within you, noticing that the usually bustling entrance appears strangely vacant. Only a few faces pass by, and a heavy silence hangs in the air, contrasting starkly with the usual lively atmosphere. Your footsteps echo in the quiet corridor as you head towards your classroom, a knot of anticipation forming in your stomach. Suddenly, a group of girls rush past you, their voices filled with excitement and urgency. Initially, you try to ignore their chatter, focusing on reaching your destination. However, a particular snippet of conversation seizes your attention, causing your heart to skip a beat. The words spoken are like a thunderclap in your ears, freezing you in your tracks. Unable to resist, you strain your ears, desperate to catch any further information. Their voices carry a mix of shock and speculation, creating an unsettling tension in the air. The words they speak seem to hang in the silence, seeping into your consciousness and intensifying your growing sense of dread. Your heart pounds in your chest, a combination of fear and curiosity gripping you.

“Apparently the whole friend group was being vicious to her, her brother just found out and is going to sort that piece of shit out.”

Your world threatens to crumble around you, the words of the girl echoing in your mind, panic surges through your veins, propelling you into action. Without a second thought, you sprint in the direction where the two people vanished, your heart pounding in your chest. With each stride, your determination intensifies, fuelled by a mix of fear and concern for your dear friend's well-being. Rounding a corner, you are met with a disturbing sight—a crowd of people gathered in a tight circle, their collective energy palpable. Anxiety grips your entire being as you push your way through the throng, desperately trying to reach the centre of attention.

Amidst the sea of faces, you hear a heart-wrenching cry, instantly recognizing it as Hwa's voice. Panic tightens its grip around you, urging you to hasten your steps. Finally, at the front of the crowd, you witness the harrowing scene before you, a confrontation between Hwa and another student named Dae. Hwa lies on the ground, blood trickling from his broken lip, while Dae stands over him, seething with anger.

Protective instincts kicking in, overwhelming your senses as you attempt to break through the circle of onlookers. Determination fuels your efforts, urging you to reach Hwa, to shield him from further harm, and to remove him from this dangerous situation. But just as you're about to reach him, a restraining hand grips your shoulder, digging into your skin, effectively holding you back.

Turning to face your captor, you recognize him as one of Dae's friends, a knot of frustration and anger forming in your chest. Desperation fills your voice as you plead with him to let go, to release you so you can help your injured friend. The intensity of the moment heightens, with emotions swirling in a tumultuous mix of fear, anger, and the unwavering desire to ensure Hwa's safety.

“You are a piece of trash, Park.” Dae speaks, his voice echoing around the hallway.

“Leave me alone, please.” Hwa’s voice is broken and trembling, causing tears to fall from your eyes, still urgently trying to free yourself from the grip you are being held in.

“Did you and your friends really think you could get away with hurting my baby sister?” Dae growls, his anger evident as he grabs Hwa by the collar of his shirt, pulling him up to meet his face.

“Please, I don’t know what you are talking about.” Hwa exclaims, his voice still as soft as it has always been, tears falling from his eyes.

“Look at you playing dumb.” In a harrowing display of cruelty, Dae continues to taunt and assault Hwa, revelling in the encouragement of the cheering crowd. Horror overtakes you as you witness the repeated acts of violence, unable to bear the sight of your friend being subjected to such brutality.

A primal scream escapes your throat, a desperate plea for the torment to cease. The sound reverberates through the air, carrying with it the depth of your anguish and the plea for mercy. Every inch of your being is consumed with the need to protect Hwa, to shield him from further harm. Summoning all your strength, you manage to break free from the grip that had held you back, propelled by a surge of adrenaline. Falling to your knees at Hwa's side, you cradle his head in your trembling hands, tears streaming down your face in anguish and disbelief.

In that moment, time seems to stand still as you take in the sight before you; one of your closest friends, someone you have grown to love, now bearing the physical scars of this vicious assault. The weight of the situation settles heavily upon you, powering a mix of anger, sorrow, and an unwavering determination to protect and support Hwa in any way possible.

Gently, you caress his bruised face, your touch an offering of comfort and reassurance amidst the chaos. Your voice trembles as you speak softly, vowing to be there for him, to stand by his side through the pain and the healing process. Unconditional love and unwavering loyalty radiate from your every word and touch, as you silently vow to do whatever it takes to ensure Hwa's well-being and seek justice for the injustice inflicted upon him.

“___.” Hwa exclaims, anxious as to why you have appeared here, involving yourself in his drama, wanting you to get as far away as possible from here.

“It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

“What have we here?” Dae questions, confused as to why you of all people would come to Hwa’s rescue.

Gaze lifting towards Dae, a surge of anger courses through your veins, fuelling a fierce determination to confront the source of your friend's suffering. The sight of him, callously laughing at Hwa's pain, ignites a burning rage within you.

“Fuck off Dae.” Your voice is bitter, threatening the man to stay away.

The laughter echoing around you intensifies the flames of fury within you, driving an indignant rage that propels you forward. The collective amusement of the crowd only strengthens your resolve to shield Hwa from any further harm. With a surge of determination, you crouch down beside Hwa, carefully slipping your arms underneath his shoulders. Your touch is gentle yet firm, as you lift him off the cold ground, cradling him in your embrace. Every movement is executed with utmost care, your focus solely on safeguarding him from any additional pain. The weight of Hwa's body against yours serves as a reminder of the vulnerability and fragility of the person you hold dear. Your protective instincts surge forth, serving as a shield against the cruelty that surrounds you.

Burning with a commitment to defend and nurture, you cast a defiant glance towards those who have found amusement in Hwa's suffering. The fury in your eyes mirrors the flames of indignation that rage within your heart. With determination etched upon your face, you steadily navigate through the crowd, disregarding the laughter and jeers that continue to echo in the air. Your focus remains solely on Hwa, your every movement calculated to ensure his safety and well-being.

“So, the mute girl finally decided to speak up. It’s a shame you are such a bitch, you are actually quite pretty.” Dae taunts you, his disgusting eyes scanning you up and down as if he is checking you out, making you feel utterly gross.

“Fuck off.” You repeat, pulling Hwa with you, away from the crowd.

“You are not going anywhere, sweet cheeks.” Dae exclaims, walking behind you and pulling on your hair harshly, causing you to topple backwards, Hwa falling with you, yet he manages to keep standing.

Your body collides with the unforgiving concrete floor, a sharp pain courses through your back, causing you to wince in agony. The impact steals your breath away, leaving you momentarily stunned and vulnerable. Yet, amidst the throbbing ache, the sound of Hwa's concerned voice calling out your name breaks through the haze. His worry for you fills the air, intertwining with the growing fury that consumes his being. Ignoring the pain that reverberates through his own body, Hwa crouches down towards you, taking your body into his grip, offering support and a lifeline in this moment of despair. With a grateful nod, you reach out to accept his hold, the touch of his warm skin bringing a sense of solace and reassurance.

“I’m okay.” You manage to whisper, Hwa helping you to your feet, you groan, your back extremely painful from the impact of the flooring.

“Look at this cute couple, guys.” Dae exclaims to the crowd, causing the crowd to erupt with noise. Satisfied with the reaction, Dae turns back to you and Hwa, who is fuming with anger.

“Why do you look so angry, Hwa?” Dae mocks the nickname you so tenderly call him, causing the boy who you call your closest friend, to see fiery red.

Before one can fully grasp the unfolding events, Hwa swiftly delivers a powerful punch directly to Dae's jaw. As a result, Dae finds himself sprawled on the floor, teetering on the brink of unconsciousness, and struggling fruitlessly to regain his composure. Hwa, on the other hand, displays remarkable composure, seemingly unfazed by the barrage of punches aimed at him. However, the moment the focus shifts to even the slightest concern for someone else, an overwhelming surge of rage consumes Hwa, overpowering his entire being.

"Let's get out of here," Hwa whispers urgently, his voice barely audible amidst the chaos. His grip tightens around your hand as he swiftly navigates through the frantic crowd, leading you towards the school's exit with a determined stride. Together, you sprint relentlessly, propelled by adrenaline and the instinct to seek refuge.

The clamour gradually fades away as you finally reach the entrance of the familiar warehouse you've frequented all too often lately. Your chests heave with exertion, breaths coming in ragged gasps, as you find relief in leaning against the sturdy door. The coolness of its surface against your clammy skin provides a momentary respite, offering a soothing contrast to the intensity of your pounding heart. Caught between physical exhaustion and a whirlwind of emotions, you struggle to discern the source of your frenetic heartbeat. Is it the aftermath of the sprint, the adrenaline coursing through your veins, or the lingering fear and anxiety from the harrowing fight you just narrowly escaped? The answer eludes you, blending seamlessly into the complex tapestry of sensations enveloping your trembling body.

“Are you okay?” Hwa questions, turning towards you, extremely concerned about you, wishing you had never got involved. Yet, he is tremendously thankful for you in this moment, for saving him from the horrific situation.

Concern etches itself into your voice as you exclaim, "Are you alright, Hwa?" Your hand instinctively reaches up, cradling his face in your grasp, delicately tracing the contours of his wounded lip and cheek. The injury, crimson and inflamed, accentuates the intensity of the moment. Time momentarily halts for Hwa as your tender touch lands upon his cheek. A rush of warmth floods his face, his cheeks flushing with a mixture of embarrassment and exhilaration. His heart skips a beat, entangled in a chaotic symphony of emotions, as the focused attention from you amplifies the intensity of his feelings.

“What were you thinking, throwing yourself in there?” Hwa exclaims, getting slightly angry at you for involving yourself in something so dangerous, and getting hurt in the meantime. However, the second he sees you flinch at his tone, he relaxes a little, taking your hand in his, trying to calm the storm in his head. Gently, he pulls you towards him, resting his forehead against yours as he caresses the back of your hand, the action causing your entire body to flare up in intense heat.

“It was dangerous, ___.” Hwa sighs, disappointed in you, yet also relieved for your defensive actions.

“You’re my friend, Hwa. I would do it again just to keep you safe.” You admit, eyebrows furrowed, worrying deeply still about the cuts adorning the man’s face in front of you.

Before you can utter another word, the comforting strength of Hwa's arms envelops your waist, securing you in a protective embrace. His voice, laced with vulnerability, reaches your ears as he confesses, "I was terrified they would hurt you, angel."

The endearing nickname, coupled with the sudden intimacy of his hug, weakens your knees, and sends a surge of electricity through your veins. Your heart, already racing, defies logic by quickening its pace even further.

Reluctantly, Hwa withdraws from the embrace, his gaze locked onto yours. In the depths of his eyes, a plea resonates as he implores, "Please promise me you won't put yourself in danger like that again. I can't control myself when it involves you." Once more, Hwa pulls your body closer to his, melding you together in a warm and tender embrace that emanates comfort and security.

“Let’s get you home.”

The journey to your house unfolds in a serene tranquillity, accompanied by the gentle rhythm of footsteps. Hwa, against your repeated protests, politely takes charge of your backpack, cradling it as if it were a precious burden. You can't help but steal glances at his side profile, where the remnants of the recent altercation have left their mark. Anger courses through your veins, directed at Dae for daring to tarnish Hwa's ethereal innocence with intentional harm.

As you near your street, you inform Hwa that you can manage from here, urging him to attend to his own injuries. Reluctantly, he relinquishes the bag, his eyes brimming with concern and adoration. A radiant smile illuminates his face as he salutes you playfully, a display of unwavering loyalty and obedience. He assures you with firm determination that he will follow your instructions, his promise hanging in the air like a tender pledge. With a mixture of longing and regret, he begins to retreat, heading back towards the familiar warehouse where his trusted friends await. Your gaze remains fixed on his diminishing figure, his silhouette merging with the shadows as he disappears around a distant corner. A sense of joy lingers within you, replaying the cherished moments etched in your mind—from the embrace that enveloped you in warmth to the tender words that danced upon his lips. It leaves you feeling both exhilarated and flustered, the blush of anticipation gracing your neck and cheeks.

Approaching your house, the remnants of your elation dissipate, usurped by a sudden shift in atmosphere. The front door, usually a barrier between the outside world and your home, reveals itself to be slightly ajar. A sense of unease settles deep within you, coiling around your heart. Despite the flicker of apprehension, you summon courage, attributing the cracked entrance to your mother's recent onset forgetfulness. The familiarity of the surroundings tries to lull your concerns, offering a fragile shield against the encroaching shadows. With cautious steps, you enter the threshold, the weight of uncertainty bearing down upon your shoulders, overshadowing the comfort of the familiar walls.

Traversing the long hallway, flashes of bittersweet memories dart through your consciousness, stirring a whirlwind of emotions that have always remained disturbing. These fragments of the past merge with the present, clouding your thoughts and leaving you in a state of introspection. With a determined stride, you make your way towards the living room, driven by the anticipation of reuniting with your mother, who likely seeks solace within those walls.

Her absence from the world, outside her locked bedroom has persisted for weeks, a sorrow-laden isolation that followed the tragic loss of your younger brother a few months ago. The weight of grief has clung to her spirit, rending her heart and soul, leaving her shattered and desolate. It's with a mix of excitement and trepidation that you approach the living room, knowing that beyond its threshold, you might find your mother, either silently engrossed in the flickering glow of the television or consumed by tears as she clings to a photograph of your departed sibling.

A sense of hope swells within you, lifted by the faint sound of her cherished soap opera resonating through the closed door. It reverberates louder than usual, yet its amplified volume fails to stir any concern within you. Instead, a profound contentment washes over you, your heart brimming with the simple joy of being able to witness your mother's face once more. With a smile adorning your features and an unmistakable sense of anticipation fuelling your every movement, your hand reaches for the cool touch of the metal doorknob. You turn it, unlocking the gateway to a reunion that holds the promise of comfort and the potential for healing.

“Mom, I missed you…” You voice trails off as you take in the scene in front of you, falling to your knees, your life feeling like it’s being ripped out of your body, a shriek ripples from your throat as you crawl towards the body of you mother, hot tears starting to stream out of your eyes like a waterfall.

“Mom, this isn’t funny, wake up. Please, I need you.”

---

On the day of your mother’s funeral, you barely make it out of bed, let alone to the shower where you spend almost an hour in, just sitting on the cold tiles, your knees brought to your chest as you let the scorching hot water cascade down your body, not even paying attention to the way it tingles and pains your soft skin.

Looking into the mirror in front of you, you see how pale and lean you have gotten, your cheekbones starting to become prominent on your features, your eyebags incredibly noticeable due to the extreme lack of sleep. Nothing some concealer cannot fix.

The ceremony is long and tedious, your heart heavy with grief and your spirit fractured by loss. It's your mother's funeral, a day that should have been filled with support and unity, yet you find yourself standing alone, abandoned by the one person who should have been there. The one person who should have shared this painful moment with you, gone. Anger wells up inside, a flood of emotions threatening to spill over. How could your own father not bother to show up? The absence feels like a betrayal, a harsh reminder of the fractured relationships that have haunted your life the past few months. With each passing minute, your anger intensifies, fuelled by the profound disappointment that you carry in your heart. Yet, amidst the rage, a quiet determination takes hold, a vow to honour your mother's memory. Even if it means doing it without your father.

Standing there, your eyes transfixed on the sight of your mother's coffin being slowly lowered into the earth, a numbness envelops you, seeping into the depths of your being. The world around you begins to blur, as if a fog has descended, obscuring everything except the weight of loss that hangs heavily upon your shoulders. It feels as though the ground beneath your feet has vanished, leaving you suspended in a void of sorrow. Every ounce of energy seems to have been drained from your body, leaving you devoid of purpose.

The thought of attending school, completing exams, once a mundane routine, now feels impossible. The weight of grief renders you incapable of leaving your bed, the covers becoming a reserve for your shattered spirit. The outside world seems too vibrant, too demanding, as you struggle to find the strength to face each day.

The days blur together, spent in the quiet solitude of your room, where tears mingle with memories, and sorrow becomes the only companion that seems to understand your pain. You feel your entire body, soul, spirit breaking into thousands of pieces as reality truly dawns on you. You are alone. No matter how hard you try, she cannot escape the haunting image etched into your mind, the lifeless body of your mother, forever frozen in time. It lingers in the depths of your thoughts, an unwelcome presence that refuses to leave.

Every blink of your eyes replays the scene, as if you are trapped in an endless loop of agony. The image haunts her waking hours and infiltrates her dreams. Each time you close your eyes, the vivid details resurface, the stillness of your mother's form, the paleness of her skin, the emptiness in her eyes. The weight of this image, like an anchor to your soul, threatens to drown you in a sea of despair.

You have not seen your eight friends since the fateful day of the fight in school. In the midst of uncertainty, you find yourself hovering on the edge of anxiety, not knowing if your new friends are thoroughly searching for you. Your mind becomes a whirlwind of questions and doubts, each thought spinning faster than the next. Are they frantically combing the city streets, calling out your name in desperation? Or have they been caught up in their own lives, oblivious to your absence? You yearn for a sign, a glimmer of reassurance that they are actively searching for you, that they haven't forgotten you amidst the chaos of their daily lives, the rumours starting to claw at their backs. The nagging uncertainty tugs at your heart, and you begin to wonder if you truly hold a place in their thoughts, or if you are slowly fading into the backdrop of their existence, just how it always seems to happen.

After hearing nothing from you for almost two weeks, it’s then when they conclude that you must have heard the horrendous rumours and for some reason, believed them. It broke them harder than it did when the rumours first came out. You are leaving them, even though you promised to stay by their side, crushing their entire souls. Not being able to come up with any other solution, they decide it must be because of the deadly rumours. The conversation Yunho had with you the night it all started, rings like an anthem in the tall boy’s head, “We will get this sorted, Yuyu.” As Yunho stands in the empty warehouse, his heart shatters into countless pieces, and he struggles to comprehend the sudden disappearance of the person who had captured his soul. The pain bites at him, seeping through every fibre of his skin.

In the wake of your absence, his once soft heart transforms into a frigid block of ice, encased in an impenetrable wall. The warmth and tenderness that once explained him now give way to walls that rise, brick by brick, shielding him from the pain of vulnerability. He retreats into himself, wary of letting anyone come close enough to inflict further wounds upon his already battered spirit. The echoes of your absence reverberate within, as he navigates through the world with a guarded heart, vowing never to allow himself to be hurt in such a profound way again. You are not who you said you were.

----

In the hushed darkness of the night, the city streets unfold before you as an uncharted path. Grief etches deep lines of sorrow on your face, your footsteps heavy with the weight of loss. Fresh from your mother's funeral, the ache in your heart resonates with every breath you take. You walk aimlessly, your tear-filled eyes fixed on the cold pavement, a sudden movement catches your attention. A young child, full of innocence and joy, frolics, and giggles in carefree abandon. But life's capricious nature intervenes, the child stumbles, tumbling to the ground with a startled cry. From the shadows emerges his mother, her arms outstretched in swift reflex. She cradles the fallen child, comforting him with gentle whispers and soothing caresses. The tenderness of the moment pierces your already fragile heart, intensifying your grief as you realise you no longer have anyone to rely on when you fall. A wave of anguish crashes over you, overwhelming you in a storm of sorrow. The stark contrast between the warmth of a mother's love and the void that now engulfs your existence feels unbearable. It magnifies your loss, leaving you feeling adrift in a world that once held such a vibrant life.

Darkness cloaks your spirit as you continue your solitary journey through the city. Each step deepens the ache within, a constant reminder of the irreparable void that has fractured your world. Within the twinkling city lights, tears blend with the shadows. Carrying the weight of your mourning soul, longing for comfort in the midst of the deep emptiness that envelops you. The city becomes a silent witness to your pain, as you navigate the night, seeking relief in a world that seems barren of such comfort.

Finding yourself walking up the endless flights of stairs, there is determination in your steps. Of course, the elevators are out of service, you grumble under your breath, but not finding it in yourself to get angry. It’s when you reach the top floor that your true intentions dawn on you, and for some reason, you aren’t even upset at your decision. Opening the door, you are met with the cold winter air of the outside, tickling and numbing your nose. Snuggling deeper into your coat, you slowly trudge your way onto the large rooftop, the view showing the entirety of the city. If you weren’t so emotionless, perhaps you would find the view beautiful.

You know your intentions. You intend to carry out the raging thoughts in your head. However, you let your mind be silent at this moment. Allowing your mind to truly see the view. At least your last view is a beautiful one. The lights of the city and surrounding buildings illuminates the rooftop in many colours, almost making rainbows around you. Strolling closer to the ledge, you rest your hands on the railing, it being icy to the touch, letting it cool down your burning hands.

This is it. This is all it took. Finally, the endless torment from the universe got to you. You thought you were stronger than this, truly, yet you must have overestimated yourself.

Just as you lift your leg to climb past the railing, you hear a sob sound from your left. Whipping your head to the left, your gaze locks onto a man standing perilously close to the ledge, a mere twenty metres away. Panic courses through your veins, electrifying your senses as you witness the man lift his leg, poised to climb over the railing. Instinct takes hold, overriding rational thought, propelling you into action.

With an adrenaline-fueled burst of speed, you sprint towards him, your footsteps resounding with urgency. Each stride is propelled by a desperate determination to reach him in time. As you draw closer, your hand reaches out, gripping his arm with a fierce strength, forcefully pulling him away from the ledge. The intensity of the moment disrupts your balance, and you both tumble to the ground with a resounding thud. As you gather your bearings, you cast a worried glance at the man beside you, relieved to see him on his knees, away from the precipice. A heavy sigh escapes your lips, momentarily easing the grip of fear that had held your heart captive. However, as your gaze settles upon his face, a chill of dread sweeps over you, causing fresh tears to spill from your eyes. In that heart-wrenching moment, a torrent of emotions crashes over you as you recognise the boy in front of you.

“Hwa? What the hell are you doing up here?”

Hwa's emotions ripple across his face, a spectrum of fury, realisation, and hurt unfolds before you, each expression chipping away at the innocence that once defined him. Your heart shatters, the pieces scattering like fragile glass, as you witness the profound transformation that has gripped him. The radiant glow that drew you so close to him has disappeared, leaving only fragments of its former shine. His features, usually animated and vibrant, now resemble a mask of emptiness. His gaze, locked on you, conveys disbelief and disbelief, struggling to comprehend that you stand before him, having just witnessed his desperate attempt to end his own life. Tears stain his face, tracing trails on his reddened cheeks, while his eyes remain bloodshot and swollen from the storm of emotions within him. It is a devastating sight, one that pierces your very core.

In that moment, the strength that once buoyed you crumbles, reducing you to a sobbing mess. The weight of the situation bears down upon you, threatening to drown you in a sea of sorrow. Your heart aches with a fierce empathy, as you see the depths of Hwa's pain laid bare before you.

Recognizing the anguish in his eyes, you wrap your arms around him, pulling him into a tight embrace. The tremors coursing through his body reverberates through your own, a testament to the intensity of his suffering.

“Leave me alone,”

“I’m not leaving you, never.”

“You already have ___.” Hwa cries out, his heart searing even more from the pain of having you next to him, seeing him so vulnerable.

“I never left you, I am here Hwa. Please tell me what is going on.”

“It was my dad. He paid Ryu to tell everyone that we hurt her. Because of me, my friends are going through hell, this is all my fault.” Hwa’s voice is muffled by the skin of your neck, his tone choppy and fast, stuttering on his words, the air not able to reach his lungs. Trembling, Hwa attempts to speak once again, his voice quivering with raw emotion as he strives to articulate the depths of his devastation. However, the weight of his suffering proves overwhelming, constricting his throat and stifling his words. He gasps for air, a desperate, guttural wail escaping from deep within him. You find no room for anger, for your attention is wholly devoted to your friend, cradling his fragile form within your embrace.

“Why would he do that, Hwa?” You pry him for answers, anything so you are able to comfort him, to know what has his entire soul breaking down.

“Because I chose my mom over him. I hate the way he treated my mother and he can't bear that his only son, the heir to his dumb company, refused to take his position. All because of me, he is ruining our lives.”

The mere thought that Hwa's own father could inflict such cruelty and depravity upon his own child sears through your consciousness. It awakens a violent stream of rage, yet you suppress it, knowing that your immediate priority lies in comforting and supporting Hwa in this extremely vulnerable moment. With unwavering determination, you hold him close, his body seemingly devoid of strength as you envelop him in the warmth of your presence.

“Shh,” you stroke the back of the man’s head, trying all you can to calm him down, knowing all too well how extreme and messy his emotions are right now, the smallest things being able to set him off into another fit of sobs.

“I’m sorry, ___, I should have never involved you with us.” The grip Hwa has on your clothes is strong, as if he is trying to ground himself.

“Hwa, it’s okay. You have given me a family; you have made me the happiest I have felt in a while.”

“Please don’t leave me. I thought, we thought you had left us.”

“I’m sorry, Hwa. I won’t leave you ever again, I promise.” Your embrace around the man tightens as you bring him closer to your own body, needing the comfort just as much as he does. Gently pulling away, you look Hwa in the eyes once again, “please don’t leave me, you cannot die Hwa. You have so many people here who care so much about you. You have so much to live for.”

Reluctantly, Hwa nods his head, tears still falling down his swollen, red cheeks. Again, you pull him towards you, this time he is able to fully reciprocate the hug, his arms wrapping strongly around your waist, resting his head onto your shoulder, silent cries falling from his drained lips. For what feels like hours, you allow Hwa to weep into you, allowing him to let all his emotions out, the bitter winter air freezing the two of you, yet your body feels like it is on fire. The thoughts of your own demise, slowly seeping from your mind, your focus only able to be on the person held in your tender embrace. As you speak, you notice the subtle change in Hwa's demeanour. The tension in his shoulders easing, and his breathing becoming less laboured. You can see a flicker of light, a glimmer of hope, begin to illuminate his tear-stained face.

Time seems to stand still as the two of you remain locked in the intimate bubble, shielded from the outside world. In that sacred space, you vow to be his anchor, his sanctuary amidst the chaos. Gently wiping away his tears, you brush away the remnants of sorrow that cling to Hwa’s cheeks. With every touch, every caress, you intend to fill his brokenness with warmth and tenderness. Slowly but surely, Hwa begins to respond to your affection. His grip on despair loosens, and a twinkle of gratitude dances in his eyes. Sitting together, enveloped in a cocoon of shared vulnerability, your hearts beating in sync, amidst the shattered fragments of Hwa's anguish, you feel your bond growing stronger than ever before.

The situation feels almost surreal, like a poignant twist of fate. Here you are, providing comfort and solace to someone who was on the brink of ending their own life, even though you yourself had come to the rooftop with the same haunting intention. The irony isn't lost on you, and in this juxtaposition of emotions, you find a glimmer of understanding.

You offer your words and support, a profound realisation washes over you, a sense that perhaps the universe has a hand in this moment. It's as if it's gently nudging you, reminding you of the value of your own existence. With this realisation comes a newfound determination to embrace life, regardless of the hardships it may present.

You make a promise to yourself right then and there, a vow to keep living, to persevere through even the darkest of times. The weight of your decisions becomes palpable, and you internalise the significance of taking control over your own life. This is your journey, your path to navigate, and you're resolved to make choices that reflect your will to live.

Amidst the gravity of the situation, the exchange of comfort and support takes on a profound meaning. The connection you share with the person you're comforting underscores the intricate web of human experiences, reminding you of the complex nature of life's struggles and triumphs. As you extend a lifeline to someone else, you inadvertently extend it to yourself as well, reaffirming the powerful impact of compassion and empathy in the face of life's challenges.

---

The next day, you went to the warehouse, knowing the group would be there around this time. Desperately needing to clarify to the eight why it is you suddenly disappeared. They deserve an explanation, you know it wasn’t right of you to suddenly vanish, but you have a feeling they would understand if you gave them the true reason for your childish behaviour. Chuckling slightly, you know the captain of the group would scold you for calling your actions immature, knowing he will tell you that people can deal with anguish in many bizarre, different ways.

With a mix of curiosity and hope, you gingerly push against the creaky, metal door, revealing a dimly lit interior that holds countless secrets. A flickering ray of sunlight pierces through the cracks in the worn-out roof, rays of light to beam onto the dusty concrete floor. The air carries a faint scent of aged wood and memories.

Your eyes adjust to the gloom, you expect to find the familiar sight of your companions gathered in their usual meeting spot. But as you step deeper into the vast space, your eager smile begins to fade. The echoes of your own footsteps being the only sounds that reach your ears, creating an eerie backdrop to your growing unease. The once vibrant walls, now marked by time and neglect, stood as silent witnesses to the absence that fills the room.

Darting your gaze around, searching for any trace of your friends. The chairs and couch where you had shared heartfelt conversations and wild laughter stood empty, their positions untouched since the last encounter. The remnants of forgotten games and unfinished projects lay scattered across the floor, a bittersweet reminder of your bond. Yet, your friends are nowhere to be found.

Panic mingles with confusion as you comb through the deserted warehouse, your heart sinking with each unanswered question. Did they leave in a hurry? Was there something you had missed? Your mind races, questions bounding around your head, desperately trying to work out the mystery that lies before you. Examining every corner, every shadow, desperately hoping to catch even a glimpse of your friends, to hear their familiar voices or see a glimmer of their presence.

However, the emptiness persists, only amplifying your loneliness. It feels as though time has frozen within these walls, leaving you suspended in a world that has suddenly grown cold and desolate. The warehouse, once a beacon of friendship and shared adventures, now serves as a persistent reminder of her friends' mysterious disappearance.

Just like that, they disappeared without a trace. You searched everywhere you could for them, the skatepark you heard Woo talk about, the record store their captain had bragged about almost every day, the specific part of the park with white flowers that Yeo liked to bring you to, the ice cream shop which they all went to almost every single day. There was not a single trace of them. The only memory being the beaten-up brown couch in the abandoned warehouse, which now appears to be officially abandoned.

---

After a long and tiring day at school, you wearily walk through the bustling streets, your mind preoccupied with the usual worries and trivial concerns.

Since the boys mysteriously disappeared from your life, the torment you endured at school escalated to vast heights. The once-familiar hallways transformed into a battleground of constant jeering and merciless bullying. Day after day, the piercing insults and hurtful taunts relentlessly rained down upon you, leaving wounds that ran deeper than you ever imagined possible. Each cutting remark, every malicious laugh, further numbed your spirit, suffocating any remaining ember of joy within you. The weight of the cruelty you faced settled upon your shoulders like an unbearable burden, crushing your spirit and leaving you questioning your worth. As the days turned into weeks, the pain only grew, carving a ravine within your heart that seemed impossible to bridge. The constant onslaught of humiliation chipped away at your resilience, leaving you more vulnerable and isolated than ever before. The vibrant colours of life dulled as you retreated into a shell of self-preservation, shielded from the outside world by a thick armour of numbness.

In the midst of this relentless storm, you found yourself sinking deeper into the depths of despair, your emotions gradually numbed by the unending cruelty. The once-bright spark of hope that had illuminated your days dimmed, overshadowed by the darkness of your daily torment. Yet you remember the promise you made yourself.

Lost in your thoughts, you are suddenly jolted from your trance as a stranger appears before you, an unexpected intrusion into your world. Instantly, a primal instinct surge within you, gripping your heart with fear. Taking an instinctual step back, your eyes narrow warily, as your body tenses in self-defence.

But as your gaze scrutinises the stranger, a peculiar realisation washes over you. There is an undeniable gentleness emanating from him, a warmth that belies his unfamiliar presence. His eyes, though unfamiliar, carry a glimmer of understanding, as if he holds some secret knowledge. Cautiously intrigued, you find yourself leaning in, allowing curiosity to momentarily overshadow your initial apprehension.

“It’s ___, right?” The stranger's voice, when it finally reaches your ears, bears an uncanny familiarity and you find yourself wondering as to how he knows your name.

“My name is Bumjoong, I know your friends…”He speaks of your eight friends, their tender nicknames rolling off his tongue with an intimate familiarity that sends shivers cascading down your spine. A chill dances along your skin as the realisation dawns upon you – this stranger knows them, knows the depth of your connection, and knows your place within their intertwined lives.

With a mixture of trepidation and longing, you listen intently as the stranger, now revealing himself as a relative of ‘Captain’, begins to unfold a heart-wrenching truth.

“I am not quite sure how to break this to you, but they have passed away.” He delicately confesses that your friends have passed away, their spirits departing from this earthly realm.

A surge of desperation engulfs you, as you plead with the stranger, your voice laced with a mixture of hope and despair, yearning for answers that might provide solace or healing.

“What? What do you mean? What happened?” your voice is desperate as you plead for one answer, anything.

However, the stranger, though understanding the turmoil within you, stands resolute in his silence. Your pleas fall upon closed lips, his reasons for withholding the details shrouded in mystery.

“I’m sorry ___, truly. You’re going to be okay.” Is all he says before slowly fading from your presence, leaving you alone with the weight of his revelation, a tempest of emotions rages within you.

“It's not true.” You say to yourself, over and over, tears falling freely from your face.

For months on end, you wage a war against the harrowing news you received. Denial becomes your refuge, a desperate attempt to cling to the belief that your friends are still alive, that their laughter and shared moments have not been extinguished. It becomes a battle fought within the depths of your own mind, as you fiercely defend the hope that they will one day return, that this cruel reality can somehow be undone.

Yet, as the relentless passage of time weaves its threads, your resistance begins to fray. The fortress of denial that you have so painstakingly built crumbles, unable to withstand the unyielding weight of truth. Slowly, hesitantly, you open yourself up to the possibility that your beloved friends have truly departed from this world. The bittersweet tendrils of acceptance seep into your consciousness, searing your heart with an indescribable ache, as you embark on a gruelling journey through the depths of grief. With each passing day, you learn to navigate the relentless waves of sorrow, gradually embracing the harsh reality that your cherished friends are no longer with you, their presence forever etched in your memories and the ache of their absence ever present in your soul.

They are gone.

⇢ taglist: @lilactangerine @plutoneu @abby-grace @sunkissed725 @lixiel0ver @acciocriativity @hyukssunflower @sunukissed @khjcoo @stopeatread @meginthebuilding27 @mychickentendou @sunnyhokyu @rxnexxi @croa-yevon @arabelleum @randomness7198 @dysftopia @lucymultistan @sookacc @starillusion13 @daceydeath @theamazinggrace-000 @smilingtokki @hasgalore @pytssamworld @just-a-really-bored-kpop-fan @satsuri3su

@theonesoldtoonedirection @wooya1224 @deadpoetsandhoney @skztrophy @kunhengie @tinyelfperson @l0vetiny @simplyalfie @doggopepper @seungily @dino-teezerr @silentcry329 @formulateez @senpai-of-doom @aaaaajonghooooo @ijwsbdinp @liniiiaa @channiespup @heyitstacy @eightmakesonebraincell @araknoid @itsmeregan @rynmlk @kazuhateez @galaxypox @chermonroe @babyhailey819 @euphoricdeni @wooya1224 @matzbear @h-nji @tunaasan @send-me-places @llynx7 @solstramaii @mlink64 @purple-bell @punkhazardlaw

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meaningofaeons · 1 year

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-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈ mr. cold feet

⊹ character(s) - sampo koski ⊹ word count - 1.8k ⊹ notes - gn!reader, spoilers for belobog museum event (opportunity makes the thief p4), reader is NOT trailblazer!!!, but they ARE part of the silvermane guards!, reader and sampo are implied to be in a ... complicated relationship, suggestive? making out ig counts as suggestive but obviously still sfw within reason /ᐠﹷ ‸ ﹷ ᐟ\ﾉ

I am once again here 2 apologize for no majesty update... I just finished the event as soon as I was well enough to get up and I... had to. I love hate love to hate and love sampo (=^-ω-^=) enjoy! also sorry this got more suggestive than I expected it to.... (=♡ ᆺ ♡=)

"Oh... I mean, oh! Oh, haha! If it isn't my favorite Silvermane Guard in the entire world, my dear Y/N~"

"Cut the chitchat, Sampo." You crossed your arms, unimpressed. "Really? I thought you mentioned a 'new lease on life' after the whole saving Belobog thing. You're still running cons?"

"Come, now, no need for that! I daresay it was fate that brought us—"

Sampo trailed off weakly at the sight of you bringing out a pair of cuffs, sweat visibly dripping down his temple.

"—...together... again..."

He chuckled warily, opting for a wisecrack.

"Well, I'm certainly open to hearing you out on your bedroom preferences—after all, Sampo Koski is nothing if not flexible, if you catch my drift—but don't ya think this is a little sudden, sweetheart? I mean—"

You advanced on him, scowling, and he visibly leapt back, arms up.

"W-Woah, woah, cool the jets! I know you've got your duty to do, all of that, hehe, and believe you me I know how dedicated you are! 'S one of the things I love about you—"

"I'm not being bought this time, Sampo Koski. Arms behind your back."

"Come on, just hear me out! Please, Y/N? For old time's sake?"

"What old times?" However hostile your tone, Sampo noticed the way you slowed just a bit, giving him a chance to speak. Then, in fake-contemplation, you placed a finger thoughtfully to your chin.

"Oh, you mean the time you snuck ten crates of Geomarrow out from under my platoon's noses, and got us all in deep shit with Captain Landau. Or, no. Perhaps you were thinking of the time you forced me to go on a 'date' with you, only to trick me into meeting your cronies at a handoff point for your stolen goods? Oh, or maybe—"

Sampo shrunk in on himself with each story, grin growing more and more sheepish and catlike with every word.

A small correction, he realized: You hadn't slowed to allow him to defend himself, but rather, to rag on every inch of his schemes and stoke what little remained of his guilty conscience.

He only acknowledged that you were finished with your story time when you began tapping your foot, brow raised. Sampo reached for you, taking a seat at the small table to move ever-so-subtly closer to your touch.

"Honey? Darling..." Your lip curled at his puppy-dog eyes, yanking your hand away. Despite the malice he could hide in those emerald irises, he was damn good at making himself appear vulnerable, too.

"Don't call me that! Especially not in public!"

"We're in a hotel room..." he pouted, tapping his fingers together. "Listen. I've got an idea that could be beneficial to us both...? I get away, and you say you lost me, and you get a little something-something? Eh?"

You were about to say no. As you should've, as you usually did, but those eyes...

"Ugh!" you slammed the handcuffs onto the table, causing Sampo to start. Even with all his wiles and exit routes, he couldn't quite escape the mild fear he had of you.

Or maybe what he feared was more so upsetting you than anything else.

"Spill! What lame deal have you cooked up in that dumb, pretty little head of yours?"

"You think I'm pretty?" The blue-haired man batted his eyelashes, but toned down the theatrics only at your frosty glare. "Um, so, hear me out. I made quite the pretty penny off of this deal, and I can offer you a whole third of what I made! In exchange, you... let me go? Scot-free? No strings attached? ...Please?"

You sighed heavily. Why did you even bother sometimes...

"Sampo, I told you, I can't be bought. I don't want stolen money, and besides, I make plenty."

You placed a free hand on your head, sliding your cuffs back into your belt. "And what's the miraculous secondary offer Sampo Koski has concocted today?"

You seemed to open slightly, and that gave the man all the push he needed.

As though flipping a switch, Sampo's contrite expression morphed into a wicked smirk, fingers dancing across the table until they reached your hand. This time, you did not pull away, much to your own chagrin and the conman's delight.

"Well... if there's one thing Sampo Koski is, it's reasonable."

"You just said the one thing you are is flexible."

Sampo chuckled, taking advantage of the absence of venom in your tone as he rose from his seat, allowing his gloved hand to run up your arm. You tilted your head away, refusing to look him in the eye.

"I can be both," You couldn't stand the look on his face. Cocky, like the cat that ate the canary.

"You know," he murmured, voice suddenly low and breathy—and, of course, right beside your ear. "If you wanted a 'lil love from your dear Sampo, all you had to do was say so."

Before you could cut off his husky words with an indignant shout, he was swift in taking your chin in his hand, pushing his lips onto yours with a self-satisfied smirk.

Your legs felt reminiscent of jelly as you clutched onto his arms, but you did not fight off the kiss he deepened with each passing second—though they felt more like hours.

Sampo Koski is flexible, indeed. He can also be reasonable, though you'd argue more against that than for it.

But above all, Sampo Koski is annoyingly, infuriatingly, irritatingly astute. Especially when it comes to you.

Your brow relaxed as you felt his tongue slip against your mouth, your grip on his sleeve loosening as he practically manhandled you. His prying hands were quick to move down your arms, your sides, and you only gained enough clarity in the single moment he brushed your rear to give his wandering hand a smack.

He only rumbled a low chuckle again, sending shivers down your spine as he settled on your hips. Sampo pressed on further, nibbling your lower lip before invading your mouth with his tongue, eager to taste every inch of you.

That was another word for him, you thought. Eager. He could never take two seconds to stop and think about anything, as always, especially not when it came to you.

But while Sampo Koski was quite prone to causing (unpleasant) surprises to those around him, so wily was he that he never quite expected them to happen to him.

As a Silvermane Guard, you were by no means weak, and certainly not weaker than even the shockingly well-built conman.

You snatched his wrists from their place atop your hips, pulling back just enough to relish the shock in his eyes as you slammed him against the wall opposite, shoving your lips back onto his before he could make even a sound.

That didn't stifle his noise afterwards, a soft groan humming into your mouth as you kissed him with new fervor.

If he wanted to play dirty, you'd dish it back out twofold.

You shifted his wrists, clasping one hand around his two arms while your other began to roam, dipping beneath his hip windows and sliding along his side. This elicited more small whimpers from the Sampo Koski, his squirming picking up.

Even though he never expected them, you knew how much the man just adored surprises—especially yours.

Your tongue swiped over his lip, and you slowly pulled back, giving him no reprieve as you latched onto his neck. The blue-haired man groaned again, making no moves or effort to fight back against you as he angled his neck to give you better access. You had to fight the urge to release his wrists and slap a hand over his mouth from how loudly he was beginning to whine for you.

"Y/N..." he keened.

Just as you were about to nudge your knee between his thighs and give him a nice, vibrant mark on his pretty pale skin, footsteps echoed loudly in the hall.

Pela.

"Y/N hasn't been answering their phone. Prepare to search each room. If Mr. Cold Feet got to them—"

Shit!

You pulled back at once, Sampo being too dazed to even really listen to what the voices just outside were saying. He chased you immediately, face flushed and eyes teary.

"Aw, c'mon, Y/N... Feels good, keep going? Yeah? Please? I like it when you—"

"Sampo, those are the guards!" you hissed under your breath, emphasizing each word carefully, watching the slow snap to reality that dawned on the man's face. He paused inquisitively, as though waiting for you to call your comrades in to arrest him, but you only placed a hand to your forehead.

"Go."

You had to barely restrain your yell of annoyance as Sampo grinned wildly, planting a big, sloppy kiss on your lips before vanishing out of the hotel window. His whisper-shout was the last thing you heard from him.

"I'll pay ya back big time for this one, honey!"

The remaining seconds you had were spent trying to fix your clothing and rub at your lips, trying to scrub away any hint of puffiness. Before long, Pela entered the room herself, raising a hand for the other guards to stand by.

"Y/N, are you okay?!"

"Fine," you tried to answer as coolly as possible. Luckily, your friend didn't seem to notice, poking about the room.

"And Mr. Cold Feet—"

"Gone before I got here. Left the room a mess, and the window open."

She raised a brow. "You weren't answering my texts."

"Sorry. I got caught up in investigating, trying to find leads... He couldn't have gone far."

"Right... Well, let's get back. We got the film, so... no harm, no foul. We can try again."

"Right. Let's go."

You tried to ignore the subtle stare of one of the guards, trying to let the mortification of your state swallow you whole.

Were you that obvious?

Still, you grumbled about it to yourself all the way back to the museum, trying to rid yourself of the floaty feeling in your chest and your mind.

This was the last time, you swore to yourself. The last time Sampo Koski gets away with his cons! The last time he goads you into an impromptu make-out session!

You knew that was a lie, and so did Sampo, who gleefully watched you from the shadows, a museum volunteer application perched in his hands.

After all, you two would have all the time in the world together if you were coworkers...

...that is, more specifically, after hours at the museum.

He couldn't wait for you to finish what you started.

#sampo #sampo koski #sampo x reader #sampo koski x reader #hsr #hsr x reader #honkai #honkai x reader #honkai star rail #honkai star rail x reader

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theerurishipper · 8 months

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Part 2 of my Paris special commentary (Part 1 here) because Tumblr is an ass and has a word limit.

Disclaimer: This is long asf.

Marinette here playing 5D chess, queen shit.

The most important thing the special confirmed is that Gabe added the word "dark" to his transformation phrase on purpose cause he's a dramatic bitch.

I am here for Claw Noir mocking Gabe. Go off, king.

"Oh nO, iT WAs aN IlLusIon!" That giggle is adorable. She's so cute.

Ladyfly is an ass name, but she looks so great.

Not Gabe getting annoyed at Claw Noir's teasing. See, now this is why we stan Claw Noir on this blog.

Gabe's plan isn't half bad, actually.

Symbolism? In my children's cartoon? It's more likely than you think.

They're having a pun-off.

RIP Chat Noir's ear.

Gabe got feathered lmao

Monarch dipped like a little bitch.

A mirror, I called it. It'll make for some nice symbolism.

"Let alone a calm and gentle mom" I wonder what Sabine is like in their world to make Emonette feel like she's so alone.

I like how they handled the villains tbh. I wasn't a fan of making it seem like Marinette was one step away from becoming a supervillain at all times, but it seems less like that's the case and more like The Supreme took advantage of her suffering and vulnerability at her lowest moments.

It's also nice that they established that Shady and Claw weren't the actual big bads and are just hurt kids who got recruited into a fight they weren't ready for. Their motivation isn't some rehash of Gabriel's, they are literally trying to survive under the rule of someone who will kill them if they don't do his bidding, and because of whom they're dying. Their life is literally full of suffering and they're trying to find something that'll give them a way out. Shady wants Marinette's life, and Claw Noir wants his mother back.

Like, it doesn't excuse their actions, but it does add a more humane element to them that lends itself better to the kind of redemption Miraculous likes to do, which is to fix things with a speech. That's why this redemption works, and Gabe's doesn't.

Anyway.

The back and forth between Chat Noir and Claw Noir was pretty funny ngl.

And we discover that Claw Noir wants his mother back. Of course.

MY POOR BABY

When Marinette was talking about how she was also angry and hurt, but chose to love herself and the world around her and chose to try and fix it... that hit hard. Honestly, it did. It's everything I love about Marinette in one speech. I love it.

And then onto my personal favorite scene in the entire special, possibly in the entire show.

That whole conversation was powerful. "I'm as well as I can be anyway," that's so profound. Like, of course you aren't going to be 100% okay after losing someone you love, but Adrien wants to move on and be happy like his mother would have wanted him to. This scene really showcases Adrien's empathy and his strength, when he acknowledges that having no friends can make it harder for Claw Noir to move on, and then he tells him that only he can make the choice to stop being alone. And that's really true. This scene really showcases everything amazing about Adrien, his hope and optimism, his empathy and his strength. How he finds the strength to keep going by choosing to not be alone. It's beautiful.

Like, it could have been so easy for both Marinette and Adrien to give into their darkest impulses, and Shadybug and Claw Noir really are just representations of how letting your hurt overpower you can lead you down a dark path, and it really highlights their strength, that they choose to make the right choices everyday, despite everything. It really highlights their characters and their arcs. And they're able to take everything they've learned, and look at what they could have been in the eyes and help them change too. It's so poetic.

It would have been a little more impactful if the show had spent more than 10 minutes out of 5 seasons focusing on Adrien's grief and how it has impacted him, but whatever.

Anyway, it also had some Adrien and Nino friendship crumbs, and I'll be darned if I didn't gobble it up like a starved animal. Also, we have confirmation that "Space Mutants vs. Ghost Shark" is Nino's favorite movie, so Nino stans please say "thank you Paris special."

And they are REDEEMED.

Shadybug fixes everything with her Lucky Charm after spending the whole special making destructive ones. My heart.

Shadybug and Claw Noir stop being evil and immediately go from hating each other's guts to flirting shamelessly. They just speedran enemies to lovers in a matter of seconds. They literally just defaulted to flirting. Truly, the natural state of Ladynoir in any universe. We stan.

Gotta be honest, I'm not a fan of the new designs. Wish they had kept the old ones. I'm one of those people whose toxic trait is liking Claw Noir's design, so I'm a little unhappy with it, but hey, it's a sweet scene.

Also, Claw Noir's hair went from the color of rotten bananas to ripe bananas. If that was intentional, I applaud the writers for being both profound and funny as hell.

Aaaaaaand Gabe is back, because we can't have nice things.

The montage going through different realities was great, it was small but I enjoyed it.

They're literally so cute omg. Couple behaviors fr. I'm so obsessed with them.

HUGS

POUND IT

They're holding hands... already... like they're in love... I'm so emotional... I WILL NEVER GET OVER THIS

And they're gone. But their adventures will continue forever in my mind and in my fanfics. And in other people's art that I will ravenously consume.

Cute Alya and Marinette scene. This is really sweet, I love the exploration of the impact Alya has had on Marinette's life.

And now, I'm not an Alyanette shipper, but I think they should kis- oh, wait, never mind, they did it.

And thus, the endless night comes to an end (it happened a while ago but that's just semantics).

Final thoughts

I really loved this so much. Sure, there were some exposition dumps that probably should have happened in the actual series, but that's not the fault of this special. This is probably my bias talking but this is the best special and it's literally perfect, no I will not take any constructive criticism on that. This, this special and everything in it, this is what Miraculous is all about. This is exactly what I wanted, this is what I signed up for. It's literally the best thing ever to come out of this entire show.

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sugarcoatednightshade · 2 months

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I haven’t thought of Lily Orchard in years, but she just made a video on dungeon meshi and I wanted to hear what she had to say. I couldn’t even finish it.

It’s clear she hates anime as a genre and is pissed about having to review something she didn’t want to watch, and that anger permeates the whole* review. On top of that, it’s so fucking disingenuous to review a show that’s not even halfway over and then claim it’s thematically disjointed - like 1. Of course it’ll seem that way if you’ve only seen the first quarter of a piece of work, we’re still in the setting up stage, these themes haven’t had time to fully commingle and resolve and 2. Even considering that, dungeon meshi does actually know what it is/where it’s going, and at this point it’s fairly obvious how all the themes/mixed genera’s are gonna fit together.**

*to be fair, I haven’t seen the entire review, so maybe she calms down partway through. I don’t make a habit of watching things I know will upset me, and watching someone make bad faith criticism of something I like would literally ruin my week

Post chapter 65 spoilers below:

**Granted, cookings prominence in the show, while cute*** on its own, didn’t really seem plot relevant to me until around chapter 65 when it was revealed that in order to save falin they would have to eat her dragon half. Y’all, I went fucking feral over that reveal.

***cute meaning: it’s used mostly for worldbuilding at first. That’s really cool if you’re into it, and an integral part of the story ryoko kui is telling, but not technically necessary in every story. There are plenty of storys who spend needless time expositing about the world instead of focusing on the interesting bits, and if you’re only a quarter of the way into DM, I can see how you might think that this is one of those cases.

But obviously, as time passes, the worldbuilding aspects become more important, because the entire show is about worldbuilding. Or more accurately, it’s a deconstruction of the fantasy genera. It spends time setting up familiar tropes and then examines how those tropes would actually play out in a realistic world, setting up and then questioning our expectations for the world in a really nuanced way.

My favorite example of this is how dungeon meshi treats dark/ancient magic.

1. The words ‘dark magic’ and ‘dark elf’ have negative but vague connotations in traditional fantasy. “The thing is bad because it is bad.” It’s a fact we’re primed to believe, but shallow and easy to question

2. We learn that marcille uses dark magic, but that she’s using it for good. “Actually dark magic is forbidden because the people in power were afraid of The Plebs and want to restrict the populaces access to knowledge” is also a common fantasy trope.

3. As we learn more about dungeons and how they intertwine with dark magic, we learn that it does truly have the power to end the world. Not by itself, but because the dimension it pulls power from is populated by beings who would use that bridge of power to enter our world and cause havoc. Holy shit, we think, black magic is actually dangerous and was banned for a reason. Naming it ‘black’ was part of a smear campaign intended to save the public by dissuading them from using it

4. And then we learn that the so called catastrophe scenario has never happened, no demon has ever escaped a dungeon and successfully ended the world. Is this because of the work of the Canaries and ppl like them, or are demons perhaps not as much of a threat as they are made out to be?

And it’s great because there is no one correct answer. We learn things through the characters, whose perspectives are limited and realistic and based on their own life experience. Nobody knows the whole story, and neither do we.

#dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi spoilers #lily orchard #I’m on chapter 70 btw #and I haven’t read the art book #so my perspective here is also limited #dungeon meshi analysis

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undertheorangetree · 8 months

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The Aftermath

Summary- Near death experiences have a habit of changing relationships.

Warnings- MDNI 18+ NSFW. DUBCON due to persuasion. Female reader. Arguments. Bigotry/Islamophobia. Discussions of near death experiences/trauma. Dark-ish/toxic Billy. Fingering. P in V sex.

Author's Note- Okay so I've never actually seen the show in its entirety because it's not available in my country so I'm working off the wikia and what I've seen in scenes. Please forgive any mistakes/misinformation, he looked too sad and pathetic not to write for. Full link below :)

She doesn't bother to knock when she arrives at Billy's flat, storming inside with little regard for his privacy. He had given her a key not long after he moved in, promising that she could come over whenever she wanted, though she isn't sure this is what he had in mind at the time.

She makes her way passed the trash building up at the front door, forcing her way inside and finding him exactly where she expects to, lounging on the couch with some football game playing on the TV. He sits up when he spots her in the doorway, the smile that graces his face when he sees her slowly fading when he catches sight of her expression. She is sure it is a storm, her anger obvious, but she doesn't give him a chance to speak first.

"Are you fucking kidding me?"

He looks at her blankly for a moment before a realization seems to come over him. "Lana told you then?"

"Yeah, Lana told me. What the hell were you thinking?"

He rolls his eyes, pushing forward to grab the beer bottle sitting on the coffee table and taking a swig. Her eyes catch the cuts on his knuckles, the opposite hand covered with a bloodied bandage, and watches the skin between his brows crease when the abused skin stretches. "Why does it matter to you? It's not like anyone was there anyway, was there? And you can't tell me they didn't deserve it."

"Why does it- Billy, you're not this stupid."

In all the years she's known him, she has never known him to be cruel. Quiet and insecure, surely, but never vicious. She almost hadn't believed Lana when she had called her, informing her of the one man attack he had pulled at the butcher's. It seemed so entirely out of character from the friend she had always known it nearly scared her, hearing about how he had destroyed the storefront for the crime of being owned by a Muslim family. But more than fear, it made her skin crawl, a disgust for him she had never felt toiling in her gut.

She isn't an idiot. She knows how he has been struggling lately. From his breakup with Becky to his consistent unemployment to his family ragging on him to make something of himself. Nothing has been easy for him as of late but she never would have expected him to let his rage out like this.

"If you only came here to bite my head off about it, save us both the trouble, yeah? Lana already beat you to it."

"So you don't regret it at all? Any of it?"

She wants him to say yes. And not just for the criminal record he has now contracted for it but for the guilt of screwing over innocent people. She wants him to prove that he is still her friend, to believe that he hasn't fallen down this path without so much as a blink.

He does little to assuage her fears. "What do I have to regret about it?"

Her disgust increases tenfold with that- she is grateful for it, as it manages to cover the pain of his confession- and she feels her face contort. "Why would you do it? What was the point?"

"They're the reason the world has gone to shit. It's 'cause of people like them, their whole fucked up religion. They're the animals here, not me."

She physically recoils at that, not bothering to hide her repulsion now. "Jesus Christ, Billy."

"Well I don't expect you to understand it. You're too nice, got a fucking bleeding heart for every poor bastard that walks past ya. It's 'cause of people like you that Nick and I-"

That catches her attention. "Nick? Was someone else with you when you went to the butcher?"

His face drops as if he realizes he has said something wrong but he still shakes his head as nonchalantly as he can manage. It isn't indifferent in the slightest. "Nah. Just my friend."

Read the rest here

#billy Washington x reader #billy Washington x fem!reader #billy Washington x you #billy Washington smut #billy washington trigger point #billy washington #trigger point #trigger point 2022 #billy Washington fanfic #billy Washington fanfiction

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demontouched · 4 days

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okay. finally time for me to try and address my thoughts on laios vs shuro. (not that anyone cares, or that i'm an important figure in the community. but it hits a little close to home, and i want to talk about it.)

when i was younger (and my various undiagnosed problems were even more rampant) i was a lot like shuro. reserved, seen as wise, generally levelheaded. i didn't have a lot of friends, and on occasion, i had a laios. notably, my little sister.

my little sister has adhd like crazy. when we were younger, she was on medicine for it, but it was mostly for school. so at home, she was very much like laios. a little brash, very confident, loud, very much herself with no shame. she would charge into things head first (matephorically and literally) and drag people along with her. it was never malicious, but it was foolhardy.

we got into a lot of fights back then. never quite the knock-down-drag-out fight that laios and shuro had, but we got into some pretty epic screaming matches. neither of us were really in the wrong here, we just didn't mesh well. i was bad at communication, my sister couldn't read social cues, and it just caused a lot of arguments. neither of us were wrong for being like we were, but we were wrong for literally screaming at each other about it.

but that's this world, laios and shuro live in a world where it's not entirely unacceptable to just. have a fist fight. they got healers and shit. if we had healers irl, my sister and i would've clawed each other's eyes out multiple times.

since then, my sister has matured a lot, and she's not really like any dunmeshi character now, so she's being discarded for the purpose of this metaphor. (we no longer have epic screaming matches)

nowadays, i'm much more laios. i've been working on unmasking (which is both a privilege and really fucking hard) and getting more comfortable with just. being annoying to some people. making some people unexplainably angry. because that's what i do. i know not everyone likes me as a person because who they are as a person is fundamentally different. because that's ultimately what's happening with laios and shuro.

shuro is a poc who grew up learning social cues like his life depended on them (it does). he's learned to be quiet, respectful, aware. he is, at his very base, different from laios.

laios has just been Like That his whole life and deals with people's negative reactions as they come. you see how he handles marcille's adverse reactions when she cringes from his love of monsters and monster food.

neither of them are in the wrong, not for who they are or what they did. again, they live in a world with healers, where they fight monsters on the daily and get resurrected regularly. a fist fight between two tall men is the least dangerous or damaging fight either of them have been in, if we're being honest.

having empathy or sympathy–or at least understanding–for other people is important, not only for real life, but for media as well.

(this leads into a whole different thing about also remembering the lines between fiction and reality, and not giving more depth to fictional characters than they are shown to have in their source media. which is a very academia sort of idea, so like. write fanfiction and have ideas and give life to these characters. nobody can stop you and you can't do fiction incorrectly.)

#dungeon meshi #delicious in dungeon #dunmeshi #please ignore this #i just wanted to get it out #laios touden #laios dungeon meshi #dunmeshi laios #shuro dungeon meshi #shuro dunmeshi #shuro

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monstersinthecosmos · 11 days

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Hi, completely agree with what you said here but it makes me very sad to think about it. As someone who imprinted on Armand at 12, Marius/Armand was my first ship in VC but I find it hard to ship them post Venice era, even though Blood Communion seems to suggest some positive developments in their relationship (Marius standing behind Armand during his argument with Benedict supporting Armand being his own person iirc?). Idk I want them to work their shit out but it’s still hard to imagine them putting their differences aside sans an apocalyptic scenario like in QotD.

And sometimes idk if Marius loves Armand enough to work on it. I know that the corner of tumblr that loves Marius (And I certainly understand the appeal of a complicated and polarizing character like him. Kudos to Anne for creating Marius!) likes to push the idea that the turning of Benji and Sybelle was mostly out of love (and to a varying extent depending on the person’s pov, due to Marius’ mental health issues) but how much was that love and how much was it ‘my pet needs to have pets so that he stays alive for ME’. Not saying these 2 motivations are mutually exclusive but I’m genuinely curious about your views.

I’m rambling but guess what I’m trying to say is, how much do you think Marius’ love for Armand is unselfish, whether in Venice, at the end of TVA or after Blood Communion?

Asdghjakl yeah I have really similar feelings about them as a ship! Like the Venice era is my favorite time period in the VC but modern/present-day Marius/Armand doesn’t really hit the same way for me because it’s just such a motherfuckin mess lol.

What I do want to say, though, is that we’re kind of dancing around a topic here that involves the inhumanity and inherent monstrosity of Marius, and while I tend to think “THEY’RE VAMPIRES” is a lazy approach to analysis, there’s a deeper version of it that’s relevant here.

What I mean is that Marius can love Armand truthfully, sincerely, unselfishly and STILL cause harm, and still love him imperfectly, and still cause problems. I think when we really wanna start dissecting Marius/Armand as a ship, and the Venice era as a whole, and whatever trauma it left on Armand vs Marius’s motivations/intentions/character morals, it’s important to remember that Marius was not human.

I think a lot about like, when we say that Armand is a “pet”, or that Denis, Daniel, Benji, and Sybelle are Armand’s pets, there’s sort of a connotation or shorthand to TLDR that it’s their cute little human. But I think about like, for example!, my fucking cats! Like, when I think about ACTUAL pets IRL, um, I would fuckin die for my cats? They’re my lil babies? I love them so fully and with my entire fucking soul but they’re dumb little animals that live in my house and I take care of them and I don’t think they have a single thought in their fucking skulls.

So when you think about like, a 1500 year old immortal night creature adopting a little human, he can love Armand with his ENTIRE being, and I believe he really really did, and it’s still “aww the cute lil human that I feed”. And Marius is unique amongst the vampires for how hard he tries to stay connected to the human world, and it’s still never enough, he’s still never quite there, so I have always believed he had the right intentions even if he fumbled it or did things that could cause harm. It’s not like, he’s a ~MONSTER~ in a scary way, but literally, he’s so removed from humanity that he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing.

(Don’t let me get into a side essay here but it reminds me so much of like, imperfect boomer parenting, like looking at different generations’ parenting styles and realizing how much harm they caused, but most people aren’t intending to harm their children and just don’t know any better. Every generation will likely experience a form of this as we learn and grow and try to be better, but I find this really interesting for Marius specifically because of the age of the author!)

He was fifteen hundred years old when he met Armand. I think in a lot of ways he acted with good intentions that wound up causing a lot of harm. But it does a disservice to the story and to him as a character to only look at the outcome, without considering the universe he’s operating in.

And idk like, where is the line between selfish and selfless love? Like, Marius is clearly a fucking mess at the beginning of TVA and didn’t take the news of Armand’s suicide very well. Is it selfish to do something drastic because he’s worried that Armand is still suicidal? Where does one end and the other begin? Especially with immortals like, is your own death a gift? Is it an act of kindness to save someone’s life instead of allowing them to check out? Idk idk! Grief is fucking messy, it can be both, but I don’t think it’s fair to characterize it as purely for himself. He even immediately fucks off to Norway in shame afterwards. I think I prefer to think he just wanted Armand to be happy and safe. By the end of the book they're still struggling to communicate with each other about religion, and in some ways I think Marius doesn't think Armand truly wanted to die, vs seeing a religious fit for what it is. So I'm not sure he sees Armand's suicide attempt as sincere, either, and maybe doesn't feel the need to respect his wish for death.

I think a lot about the conversation Marius has with Armand after he turns Benji & Sybelle and realizes how bad he fucked up.

"You loved them selflessly," he whispered. "For all their strange faults, and wild evil, they were not compromised for you. You loved them perhaps more respectfully than I... than I ever loved you." He seemed so amazed. I could only nod. I wasn't so sure he was right. My need for them had never been tested, but I didn't want to tell him so.

Even at 500 years old, Marius still doesn’t entirely understand Armand as a complete person. He doesn’t completely understand Armand’s needs, or the person he wants to be, or what his human companions were to him. I think it even starts when Armand is still alive, how Marius treats him like a silly little pet, like, Armand’s piety is a cute little quirk that Marius humors without ever truly respecting. It doesn’t occur to him that Benji & Sybelle aren’t just pets. And I think Marius being stuck in his trauma means he’s just perpetually trying to believe in himself and control everything around him, while Armand stuck in trauma means he’s constantly trying on different roles and figuring out who he is.

(But FUCK ME, christ, “I wasn't so sure he was right. My need for them had never been tested, but I didn't want to tell him so.” this really fucks me up so bad, we have to keep talking about this another time because like, these two can NOT communicate with each other! They are useless with the barrier between them maybe they need to drink from each other more often and iron this out.)

Someone can do their best, and mean well, and still cause harm. Humans do this, too. I’m sure we’ve all been there. And Marius is a great example of vampires being stuck in the trauma of their turning—it doesn’t matter how wise he tries to be, he always comes back to the same trauma, over and over. Even the way he treats Armand in Venice is a direct result of Marius trying to fix his own trauma. And like, would therapy even work on a vampire, or are their brains stuck forever where they were? How much of their “changing” is just learning behavior, and learning to mask?

Because I think Marius 100% could do that for Armand. He loves Armand. Armand is his child. He was the first fledgling Marius ever made of his own will, after 1500 years! But I think canon left us off in a place where neither of them are quite there yet. Marius is in decent shape at the end of the series, I think—it feels like he’s made some huge strides in accepting himself and his nature, so I think there’s some potential! Armand also has to learn how to use his fuckin words a little bit better, which he’s never been good at, but I think the way he goes off on Lestat after keeping that inside for 200 years is a really great sign!

I go back and forth about “does therapy even work on vampires” all the time, like, do they have neuroplasticity, are they capable of change, have we uncovered something in the PL Trilogy that could be a key to them functioning better and learning to change. I don’t really have an answer because canon doesn’t, it’s just a fun thing to think about, but it’s the best way that I can reconcile Marius’s intentions vs his actions, and how he somehow continues to make the same mistakes and never learns!

Basically, I think it’s not helpful to ask if Marius loves him enough. He does! But loving someone doesn’t mean we magically know how to behave, and the qualities in Marius that cause him to behave selfishly are so deeply tied to his trauma, his control issues, his use of ego as a defense mechanism. And even in real life we can have boundaries and hold people accountable when they hurt us, even if it’s because of mental illness. We can have empathy and still have boundaries, and we can be hurt and still know when something wasn't personal. That feels kinda IRL and serious to frame vampire meta but like, Marius can love people and still fuck up, because he can’t help it, and I don’t think it’s a fair reading of the text to insist he’s a diabolical abuser because it just doesn’t really match his characterization otherwise.

I hope he gets better!

#trauma hole theory #marius de romanus #marius/armand #armand #the vampire armand #tva quotes #vc quotes #vampire chronicles #deep ass thoughts about vampires

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