#chicken things

[miseria-fortes-viros]

yoooo guys these wings my dad made look INSANE i can’t wait to try them tomorrow

[druid-for-hire]

[image id: a four-page comic. it is titled "immortality” after the poem by clare harner (more popularly known as “do not stand at my grave and weep”). the first page shows paleontologists digging up fossils at a dig. it reads, “do not stand at my grave and weep. i am not there. i do not sleep.” page two features several prehistoric creatures living in the wild. not featured but notable, each have modern descendants: horses, cetaceans, horsetail plants, and crocodilians. it reads, “i am a thousand winds that blow. i am the diamond glints on snow. i am the sunlight on ripened grain. i am the gentle autumn rain.” the third page shows archaeopteryx in the treetops and the skies, then a modern museum-goer reading the placard on a fossil display. it reads, “when you awaken in the morning’s hush, i am the swift uplifting rush, of quiet birds in circled flight. i am the soft stars that shine at night. do not stand at my grave and cry.” the fourth page shows a chicken in a field. it reads, “i am not there. i did not die” / end id]

a comic i made in about 15 hours for my school’s comic anthology. the theme was “evolution”

[monsters-and-macaws]

Do you think Panchito Pistoles eats rocks

[theshadowrealmitself]

I like to think that Vulcans who come to understand that Humans just can’t try to process emotions the same way as them, it’s just healthiest to let it out in harmless ways, decide that venting and stuff should be taken just as seriously as Vulcan’s meditation time, and will encourage the Humans around them to complain about what’s upsetting them

People who are used to aloof Vulcans who avoid Humans at all cost running into one comforting a Human

“-and then they said my cheesecake was subpar, and they didn’t even bring a dish!!!”

“The purpose of this event was that every participant brings a food item of sorts, correct?”

“Yeah!!”

“And they did not follow this rule while insulting dishes that were brought?”

“Mostly just my dish but yeah >:(“

“How illogical”

“That’s what I’m saying!!!”

[waitmyturtles]

(Source)

[kangals]

ER veterinarian: *reviewing patient's history* "and what food does your dog eat?"

client: "he eats yams."

vet: "... yams?"

client: "yeah, yams."

vet: "just yams? nothing else?"

client: "yeah."

vet: "the only food that you feed your dog is yams? no supplements?"

client:" "just yams."

vet: *increasingly distressed* "you cannot feed your dog only yams, ok? you NEED to feed something else. that is a very unbalanced diet and could be what's making him sick."

client: "well what should i be feeding?"

vet: "dog food! kibble, canned, anything from a pet store!"

client: "but that's where i buy the yams!"

vet: "what?"

client: "you mean i have to feed a bunch of different brands??"

vet: "what?"

(it was discovered, much to the vet's relief, that the client was mispronouncing the brand name "Iams")

[bigfatbreak]

dad villain au: did emilie just. not consider at all that adrien was literally dying at the time. wow

she's in the habit of deciding when Adrien's suffering is acceptable, and if it is, she'll just fix it later.

[gem1ny]

A shy feathery Vash 🐓🐓🐓

[jewish-sideblog]

did you guys know that the Hebrew word for phoenix is "sand chicken"

[steddiecameraroll]

Eddie’s waking up in the hospital…

“Woooo, oh wait, did the upside become the inside?” Eddie’s eyes try and focus as his head wobbles, attempting to look around his hospital room. “This isn’t the trailer.”

His voice is mumbly and loose. The drugs they have pumping through him are keeping him comfortable.

“Shit, Eddie?” Dustin jumps from his seat and grabs onto the man’s arm.

“Dustin? Why are you…hobble? Hobbit? Mordor,” he giggles to himself briefly. “No, your foot?”

“Holy shit, he is drugged up,” Dustin comments to someone behind him. “I twisted it pretty bad, but I’m ok, dude. How you feeling?”

“Who’er talkin to?” Eddie tries to sit up to look around Dustin but collapses back in quick exhaustion.

“Steve, Steve’s here,” Dustin steps back and the elder teen sits up, giving Eddie a little wave.

“That’s not Steve, silly.” Eddie waves his hand. “That’s a-a fuckin angel. Look at him.” Eddie turns his head more trying to get a good look. “Are-are you an angel, pretty boy? Here to take me to the pearly gates?”

Steve huffs giving Dustin an embarrassed smile. “Uh, no angel, dude. Just me.”

“Steve?” He squints before sighing loudly. “God, you’re hot. Dusty your fake brother is hot.”

“Jesus,” Dustin chuckles. “That’s Steve, man.”

“I know, see him?” He motions his hand trying to get Dustin to lean in closer. “He’s hot,” he whisper yells into Dustin’s face.

“Ok, you probably need to rest.” Dustin pats Eddie’s arms delicately.

“Hey? Hey Dustin?” Eddie slaps his hand against the available piece of Dustin that he can reach. “I’m gunna marry that angel. I’m gunna marry him. Do you think…? No, I don’t think I can have nuggets.” He tilts his head back peering over to Steve. “Sorry, angel, I can’t have your six nuggets. But I’d hotwire an RV with you for the rest of time.”

“What is he talking about?” Dustin whispers to Steve, whose face is the same color as the red Nike swoosh on his shoes.

“Um… doesn’t matter. Uh, Eddie? Why don’t you relax man. Just, try and go back to sleep.”

“Will you be here?” He asks nervously.

“Uh, maybe,” Steve’s wringing his hands together avoiding making eye contact with Dustin.

“Oh,” Eddie hums. “You look sad. Don’t be sad.”

Eddie’s voice comes out wispy and soft, making the hairs on Steve’s arms stand up.

“I could make chicken nuggets. How bout that, angel? Chicken nuggets?” Eddie’s eyelids are too heavy to keep open but he turns his head in the direction of Steve.

“Yeah, man. Sounds good. Don’t worry bout it though. You should rest. I’ll be here when you wake up.”

“You will?” Eddie sounds elated.

“Yeah, you got it.”

“Hmm, so pretty,” he murmurs quietly before slipping back to sleep.

“Ok, so what did I miss?” Dustin leans on his crutch and glares down at Steve.

“Nothing?” Steve shrugs.

[treasuregamble]

please please go fall in love with tinlee on etsy

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

oh right, technically i sell t-shirts

i forgot about that

[sunderwight]

disciple luo binghe, running errands for his shizun one day, somehow manages to be in the exact wrong (right) place at the exact wrong (right) time and catches shang qinghua meeting with mobei jun

in order to keep luo binghe from tattling right away, shang qinghua dissembles in a panic and claims that his clandestine meetings with mobei jun are happening because they're lovers and definitely not because shang qinghua is betraying the sect and handing their secrets over to demons in order to save his own hide. when that almost doesn't work, he also tells luo binghe that he knows he's part demon, and that if luo binghe rats him out then shang qinghua will take him down with him. mutually assured destruction

it works, and even though luo binghe threatens him quite a bit (jeez kid calm down, you might be the almighty protagonist but also you're like sixteen) he agrees to keep shang qinghua's fraternizing a secret. but if ANYTHING BAD should happen to the sect or especially to luo binghe's shizun because of this, luo binghe will take shang qinghua down even if it does ruin his life too

shang qinghua, now sweating even more bullets about the impending immortal alliance conference: cool! cool cool cool sounds great cool yeah

so shang qinghua can add "being blackmailed by the punk ass brat I sort of created" to his list of stress-inducing woes. which gets even worse when luo binghe keeps somehow sensing if mobei jun is around for more than a couple hours and showing up, and picking fights with him?? kind of??

wtf has the protagonist been taking tips from liu qingge or something...?

shang qinghua feels like he's gonna have a heart attack when mobei jun just snorts and tosses luo binghe by the scruff like he's an annoying yappy dog

mobei jun actually knows what's up though. teenage half-demon who has never been around his own kind has become spoiled by the lack of competition on this front, and now his hackles are all up because he wants to claim the whole mountain range as his territory, and his instincts are screaming at him to challenge mobei jun about it so that they can decide who is actually top dog. since mobei jun could easily kill him, especially with his blood sealed, and has been clawing rocks and pissing on trees along the borders of an ding peak since before luo binghe was born, he's clearly got seniority here

and since qinghua doesn't want mobei jun to just kill the little shit (fair enough -- that sealed bloodline does look kind of interesting) that means it's up to mobei jun to teach him how to do things like interact with other demons without making a complete fool of himself. lesson one: what to do when you challenge someone out of your league and they win, assuming they don't just kill you

so luo binghe reluctantly gains another demon tutor

meng mo actually approves. he's been out of the loop on demon high society for a long time, and has lacked a body for long enough too that he's forgotten a lot of the particulars of socializing. it'll be good for luo binghe to pick up some manners that aren't just silly human tea ceremonies and things. maybe he'll start addressing meng mo more respectfully for a change!

(lol no)

luo binghe is partly like "I don't need to learn demon social skills since I'm spending the rest of my life as a disciple of qing jing peak" but partly like, well, if shizun knew about this and didn't freak out about it, he'd probably say that knowledge is power and learning how to handle politics and diplomacy of all kinds is important. and despite himself luo binghe is also interested, because this is a whole perspective on his own nature that he's never really gotten advice about

also, mobei jun is the lover of shang qinghua? mobei jun is a demon who successfully seduced a cang qiong peak lord? does he have any advice about that?

(he does -- all of it very bad)

anyway all of this sort of fucks up the immortal alliance conference developments really good, so the system kind of gives up and settles on some other big transformative achievements that luo binghe has to complete in order to be suitably heroic

but shen qingqiu has no idea and so the reprieve just seems to come out of nowhere until several years later, when he walks in on luo binghe with his claws out and huadian gleaming in the company the demon king of the northern desert, the two of them playing weiqi or something while they wait for shang qinghua to get back from some random logistics crisis he had to rush off to

shen qingqiu: ...?!?

luo binghe, panicking: wait shizun I can explain it's not what it looks like SHIZUN I SWEAR I WAS GOING TO TELL YOU PLEASE DON'T BE MAD--!

shen qingqiu: all this time I thought you were sneaking out to meet a girl, and this was what you were doing instead?!

luo binghe: WHAT?? shizun no I'd never do that I swear I don't even like girls!

shen qingqiu: that's not -- wait what do you mean you don't even like girls?!

mobei jun, unperturbed and still focused on the weiqi board: he's gay

[snailtaco]

Hey, y’all. Was feeling a lil bit silly and goofy so now this exists :)

[makenna-made-this]

Forgot to post these simple little chicken hacky sacks/heat packs i made for my siblings for christmas. 100% cotton and filled with sunflower seeds (the chickens did NOT appreciate me borrowing from their stash but i was out of rice) so they can be heated up for hand warmers or to ease aches and pains

(or for balancing it on your head i guess)

[solarg0blin]

I redrew some Merlin characters to be more historically and culturally accurate! The text is their original names in a later Latin script, yoinked from a display in the Corinium Museum, Cirencester. (Sneaky edit to add: Y'all are incredibly welcome to use this in any way you want, I would love to see more of my home's culture being represented more accurately in media!!) (Also on Instagram)

Unlabelled version under the cut!!