#continuation of the songfic | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bratzforchris · 6 months

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Tumblr Girls, M. Sturniolo

Summary: Matt can't help but to visit his favorite fuck buddy on tour, who just can't help but to tease him with her Tumblr posts. Songfic loosely based off of "Tumblr Girls" by G-Eazy<3

Pairing: Matt x feminine and influencer!reader

Warnings: Smut, unprotected p in v, marking, bondage, friends with benefits, fingering, oral (f), dom!Matt, choking, intoxicated sex (alcohol), dirty talk, belly bulge, no aftercare but fluffish (?) ending (i do not condone any of this irl!! it is *fiction*)

Word Count: 2.9k

A/N: Get your holy water ready girlies...

Ever since you were a little girl, you had been enamored by the idea of being famous. Something about the life called to you, whether that be walking down the street and people knowing you, or simply realizing that you were having an impact on someone, somewhere’s life. Fortunately, you had grown up in the age of the Internet, allowing you to truly harness what you had wanted to do for so long. You loved having creative freedom, and you loved making a persona that was truly you.

You had been making YouTube videos, doing a variety of Instagram influencing, and posting carefully crafted aesthetic photos to Tumblr ever since middle school. Whereas a lot of the girls had moved out of their Tumblr influencer phase, you never really had. You still loved the dark, “grunge” aesthetic of it to this, and had turned your account into a more mature, X-rated theme of what it once had been. You loved doing social media as your full time job for a variety of reasons, from the freedom it gave you to the opportunities.

Perhaps your biggest “opportunity” was your fellow influencer and YouTuber, Matt. Your relationship with Matt was…complicated, to say the least. As much as you were a wholesome, loving duo on camera, you were filled with an almost primal need for each other off of it too. You and Matt had never discussed a true, established relationship, mostly because you were both so young and so busy, and the rough, hard fucking in itself was enough to satisfy the needs in both of your lives.

Your careers had consumed both of you as of late, dragging Matt all over the country for the Versus tour, and leaving you back in LA with a variety of brand deals to film and photo shoots to arrange. There was one in particular that you were heavily looking forward to, mostly because you knew that it would drag Matt back to you, unable to help himself. In a fateful turn of events, you had been emailed about a Calvin Klein intimates shoot that would just so happen to drop on the day Matt was back in LA for a show. In an effort to bring back the Tumblr renaissance and the hold Calvin Klein had had during those days, you had insisted that the photos be posted to Tumblr before any other social media platform.

Matt: i’m back in la tn

You: oh i know ;)

Matt: ??? huh

You: no reason. just focus on winning tonight :)

You smiled to yourself as you closed your text messages out and migrated over to your photo gallery. Your manager had sent you the photos of the shoot to be posted this evening, and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t planning on fucking with Matt’s head using them. You had missed your fuck buddy, after all. The late night phone sex wasn’t the same as him in your bed, mumbling in your ear about how well you were taking it.

The photos from the shoot were of you in a gray Calvin Klein bralette with a matching thong. The photos had been toned with a sepia overlay, highlighting the curves of your breasts and hips. Your hair fell back against your shoulders gracefully as your doe eyes stared up at the camera. The shots were nothing short of sexy, making you imagine how Matt would react when he got the post notification. Maybe he would be sitting backstage, getting ready to go on and trying to hide his growing boner both from his brothers and the fans, which only made you smile more.

You and Matt continued to text back and forth for a while, until you suddenly stopped responding. This was part of your game with each other; to make the yearning so painful that it just made the sex more passionate. Once you saw that it had hit the fifteen minute mark until Matt was supposed to appear on stage, you hit ‘post’ on the Tumblr draft of your photos that you had planned out earlier in the day. The caption, come over 💋, was directly aimed at Matt, but no one else needed to know that. Sure enough, less than one minute later, you received a text from the brunette that had your heart racing and your thighs clenching.

Matt: what the fuck, y/n?

You smiled as you typed out your own message, imagining Matt biting his lip and trying to conceal the growing tent in his pants as he studied the photos.

You: what?

Matt: you know what

You: no i don’t

Matt: that fucking post

You: it’s part of my job, matt. quit being ridiculous. have you not heard about tumblr girls making a comeback?

Matt: watch it. i’m coming over and fucking that pretty pussy good tonight.

You knew what your and Matt’s usual routine was, so you grabbed another cup from the cabinet and the bottle of whiskey, migrating over to the gray couch in your living room. You didn’t bother waiting for the brunette to start drinking. Matt had a key to your apartment and would definitely make himself known when he arrived. You slowly sipped at the amber liquid, feeling the heat rush to your cheeks and in between your thighs as you thought about Matt and how much you had missed the feeling of his skin on yours.

Sure enough, the door swung open with a loud bang a few minutes later. In came Matt, hair disheveled and still in his blue Matthew jersey. His growing erection was obvious as he flopped onto the couch, lips immediately crashing into your own. Matt’s hands were all over you as you devoured each other; in your hair, running across your hips, grabbing your ass.

“Fuck, baby. I missed you.” he panted, leaning back against the couch as you passed him a drink.

“I missed you, Matt,” You smiled softly, tucking one of his curls behind his ear. “How has tour been?”

Matt took a large swig of whiskey, before placing the cup on the coffee table. “Good. But not as good as you looked in those goddamn pictures.” he practically moaned.

“I noticed you have my post notifications on,” You teased, despite blushing at his words. “Catching feelings, Matthew?”

Matt rubbed your bare thigh, scooting closer to you so that he could suckle on the sweet spot behind your ear. “Do you know how hard it was?” he asked, leaving a hickey. “To have to go out on stage with my brothers and act normal when all I could think about were your tits and how I want to pound that little cunt to pieces? Huh?”

You whined as Matt continued to trail hickeys down your neck, mumbling things like “missed you so bad” and “gonna fuck you so hard” after each one. You two fell back against the soft cushions of the couch, Matt holding you down by the hips as his lips caressed your neck, the curve of your collarbone, and the dip of your breasts. You went to reach for Matt’s ringed fingers, only for him to smack your hand away.

“No,” Matt said harshly, moving one hand from your hip to your throat. “Tell me how fuckin’ bad you want it first,” he growled, squeezing your throat just enough to make the air catch in your lungs. “Tell me you wanna get off on my fingers like a goddamn bitch in heat.”

You gasped for air as Matt continued to squeeze, your arousal thumping through your veins. “P…please,” You whispered, eyes wide with lust as he continued to choke you just enough to get you going, but not enough to actually hurt you. “Need your fingers.” You whined, looking up at him through your lashes.

“Good girl.” Matt hummed, alcohol hot on his breath as he moved his hands from your throat to practically rip your gray panties off.

With your friends with benefits arrangement, there was no time for gentle caressing or sweet nothings. Matt began to finger you roughly, the cool metal of his rings brushing against your slick folds as he rubbed his thumb across your clit at a dizzying pace. He wasn’t stopping there, either. Matt immediately thrust his middle and ring finger inside of you, pulling you closer to him. It had only been a few minutes, and the ache to orgasm was already building in your lower stomach.

“Matt,” You wailed, nails gripping his back. “Oh my god, Matt,” Tears began to roll down your face as the brunette continued to pleasure you. The combination of his fingers inside of you, the friction on your clit, and the added sensation of his rings were clouding everything in a lustful haze. “Need to cum.” You sobbed.

“You’re fuckin’ crazy if you think you’re comin’ on my fingers instead of tongue.” he chuckled roughly.

With that, Matt threw his head down and forced your thighs apart, burying his face in your pussy. He began to devour you like you were the last meal on earth and he was a starving man. His tongue ran across your slit and clit, before licking your hole. You had no choice but to let out little squeals and whimpers as pleasurable sensations attacked you from all angles. Matt ran the flat of his tongue across your clit and you lost it, sobbing as your hands found his hair.

“Matt, please,” You begged. “‘M gonna cum.”

Your fuck buddy just nodded, still enjoying the taste of you on his tongue. You immediately took it as a sign to let go, releasing the tension that had been building in your stomach. You came all over Matt’s tongue, panting and breathing heavily as your body shook from the pure force of your orgasm. Matt pulled his head from between your thighs, licking his lips and fingers with a smirk, blue eyes hungrily grazing over your body that was still wrapped in the bra and flannel with your bare ass on display.

“You taste so goddamn good, you know that?” he asked, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear as you panted.

You smiled as Matt pressed a kiss to your pubic bone, but it was clear that the brunette wasn’t done yet. Matt slowly pulled the red and black material from your shoulders, smiling with more than just happiness. He had an intention and you could see it in the way he was toying with the fabric, eyes lighting up with lust. Matt didn’t speak again until he had removed your Calvin Klein bra, leaving you completely exposed on the couch as he stared down at you.

“Hands.” he said.

It was one word, but the command held an authoritative aire that had you thrusting your wrists to meet Matt’s own. Matt knew you better than practically anyone, which meant he knew all of your dirty little fantasies. Knowing you had a thing for bondage, the brunette quickly and expertly bound your wrists together in the flannel, giving it a tight tug to make sure it was secure. Your breath hitched at the pure filth of everything, but all you knew was that this alone was making your legs clench with need for another climax.

Matt was straddling you on the couch, fully clothed, which just added to the dominance he had over you. You were completely naked and covered in blooming hickeys he had left earlier in the evening with your wrists bound together by a flannel. You truly looked like Matt’s little cumslut, but you couldn’t find the decency in you to care anymore. You just knew that you were at his mercy and that you needed him. Now.

The brunette could sense your urgency and decided to have a little ‘fun’ with you. Matt took his time removing his shirt, allowing you to bask in the glory of him shirtless, all tanned skin and tattoos, but completely unable to do anything about it other than whimper and let out breathy moans. He moved onto his jeans next, painstakingly undoing his belt and throwing his pants to the side. The boy left his boxers on for the time being, teasing you as he stroked his cock through the plaid fabric.

“Wish that was you, huh? Strokin’ my dick and makin’ me feel good?” Matt chuckled, moaning when he hit a particularly sensitive spot.

You whimpered and writhed against your bond. “Need you in me, Matt. Please.” You whined.

Finally, Matt slid his boxers off and tossed them to the side, allowing his erection to finally spring free. His dick was practically touching his stomach, making your mouth run dry with a mixture of excitement and nerves. After so long apart and without truly fucking, you had forgotten just how big he was. Matt climbed on top of you once more, rocking his hips back and forth on your own without actually riding you.

“Beg for it. Tell me how much you love my cock, baby girl.” Matt groaned at the friction of your skin against his own, becoming harder by the second.

“I need you inside me. Need your dick, Matt.” You whimpered, the teasing growing straight to your nipples and cunt, making you almost ache with arousal.

“That’s right. Good fuckin’ girl.”

Without another word, Matt slammed into you, making you take him to the hilt. You let out an involuntary scream at the feeling of suddenly being so full, your back arching against the couch cushions. The feeling of him inside you, bare and hard, was enough to push you to the brink of orgasm. Your second always came faster than your first, and right now was no exception. Matt was riding you at an ungodly pace, his balls slapping against your ass with every thrust as he straddled you.

“Oh my god, baby,” Matt moaned loudly. “I missed your wet little pussy. So tight, just for me.”

The filthiness of his speaking, combined with your bonds and the feeling of him fucking you was pushing you over the edge. You wanted to tangle your hands in Matt’s hair or run your nails down his back, but instead you were unable to do anything that wasn’t taking his fucking like a slut. Matt pressed down on the bulge in your stomach from being balls deep, a smirk on his face.

“You feel that, baby? Feel you takin’ me like the cockslut you are?” he chuckled.

You whined as tears rolled down your face, bucking his hips up to meet his own. “Matt, I…I–need to, please.” You wailed, unable to form coherent sentences in your intoxicated and lustful state.

“You gonna cum? Gonna make me feel appreciated?” Matt’s blue eyes scanned your face, enjoying the view that was you under him, tied up and sobbing.

“Mhm!” You sobbed.

“Then prove it.” he sneered, pressing on your stomach roughly again.

You didn’t need to be told twice. You immediately let your climax take over, your cunt clenching against Matt’s cock. This caused the brunette to let out a string of curses as you came down from your high, your entire body shaking. He knew he was playing a risky game here, even though you were on the pill, but Matt just loved fucking you bare more than anything in the world. The brunette quickly pulled out, and before you knew it, your stomach was covered in thick and warm, white ropes of Matt’s cum.

He laid down beside you on the couch, panting heavily as you both came down from your shared highs. Once your breathing had returned to semi normal, Matt kissed you roughly and undid your bonds, before rolling off the couch. Without another word, he pulled his clothes on, straightening his hair. Your fuck buddy kissed your forehead as he busied himself around your apartment, cleaning up the whiskey and cups and retrieving a warm washcloth to wipe down your body with.

Once everything had been done, Matt tucked you in with a blanket, kissing your forehead. “I gotta go. We’re driving up to San Francisco tonight and I told Nick and Chris I would be back by two. I’ll see ya once the tour is over, yeah?”

You smiled sleepily as Matt slipped out your front door and into the night. Whereas you would’ve loved for the brunette to stay the night, you knew that you both had jobs to do and that right now, you were just fuck buddies and that was that. But as you drifted off to sleep, a warm feeling spread through your tummy that you and Matt wouldn’t stay “just friends” for long.

tags ♡: @aemrsy @jake-and-johnnies-slut @mattsfavwh3re @suyqa @chrissturnswife @mbsbaby @herxyz @lovingchrissposts @caffeinatedscorpio @bunny-cotton @crazychrisl0v3r @sturnioloxlver @emmagirouard @athaliahxoxo @bitchydragonparadise @ilydeaky @soggyslugg169 @not-phone-guy @books0fever @stingerayyy2 @sunsetsturniolos @mimi-luvzyu @faygo-frog @oobleoob @runasvengence

note ♡: if you'd like to be added to my taglist, click here <3

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xlpoww · 1 year

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bad for business

hi!! this is my second attempt at writing since middle school- so excuse me for it being so short/bad lol!! i had started recently watching one piece with my boyfriend and then the live action came out and i fell even more head over heels in love with sanji this is a result of that

no warnings!

word count: 620

opla! sanji x f!reader

songfic-> bad for business by sabrina carpenter

CONTINUATION (but also not a part 2) jealousy, jealousy

life on the baratie wasn’t always easy, lovely nonetheless. you couldn’t imagine trading it for anything, even if it meant having to watch your flirtatious crush work his magic on every lady in the room.

good for his heart..

sanji vinsmoke is a flirt. no one talks sweeter than the young chef with dreams of the all blue.

“now what for the lovely mademoiselle?”

his voice floats through the air with a charm none could replicate. you don't even have to turn your head to know the question was paired with a charming smile. he might have even winked at the girl.

her flustered giggle fills the air as she blushes up at the blonde. ordering with a smile like she’s won the lottery, her blue eyes lock on him as he retreats to the kitchen for the wine requested.

with a chuckle and and shake of your head, you continue clearing the table in front of you. the tall blonde man was quite the smooth talker, and did a wonderful job to keep the woman with deep pockets coming back. so who were you to complain that he was so sweet?

his heart was already spoken for.

…but very bad for business

you’re no stranger to the lustful stares of the restaurant guests, and have learned to mostly turn a blind eye to them. though, every once in a while a girl takes it a little too far with him.

as you walk by her table, tray full of food in hand, you can’t help but notice her heated stare. it wasn’t directed at you, but your best friend speaking to another round table of guests. slightly on guard, you continue on towards table 6, smiling sweetly at the brunette man who winks at you as you place the ribs down on the table in front of him.

“I didn’t realize Baratie had started hiring models? how much do they pay a pretty thing like you huh?”

you feign bashfulness, looking off to the side with a giggle.

“not enough you make it seem”

of course you’re more than used to the gross things some of the guests would utter about you (to your face nonetheless); so you knew to brace yourself a bit. but the man doesn’t escalate any further, shaking his head with a laugh that hints to you the size of the tip you’ll be getting. you turn back to him, once again smiling and telling him to let you know if they needed anything else, tucking your tray under your arm and walking back towards the kitchen.

all of my friends think i've gone crazy-

“that blonde at table 8 seems to have her eye on you-” you jest, walking up to sanji with a waggle of your eyebrows. he scoffs at you, a smile forming as he winks

“doesn’t every woman who walks into the restaurant?” he brushes past you, placing a hand on your shoulder to steady himself as he goes. you find yourself turning your head to follow his movement, grabbing onto his hand and using it to pull him closer. he seems surprised when you tug him down to your level to whisper in his ear.

“i'm sure i could show you a better time than she could” a wink finished off your flirty statement. it’s a it of a struggle to hold in the satisfied giggle, and you walk back off to go take another table’s order.

sanji’s face is dusted with a pretty pink as he stares after you, not that you would have been able to notice.

you would also fail to hear the teasing of some of the kitchen staff after you left,

“damn casanova, i’ve never seen you left so speechless”

“she’s gonna give you a run for your money lover boy!”

there was a way only you could make his heart race.

-but they don't know me like my babyyy

#opla #opla sanji x reader #opla sanji #one piece #one piece x reader #vinsmoke sanji x y/n #sanji x reader #sanji #vinsmoke sanji #fluff #jealousy #flirting #reader insert #bad for business

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jointherebellion215 · 7 months

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If It's True

Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen x female!reader

Summary: When an unexpected guest crashes your House's welcome feast for the Harkonnens, your life unknowingly becomes the start of a sad, sad song.

Word Count: 872

TW: Manipulation, Dark!Feyd-Rautha (so Regular Feyd-Rautha), she/her pronouns, AFAB reader, songfic

A/N: Hi, it's your friendly neighborhood shitposter. I'm taking a huge leap of faith with this fic, because I truly haven't written anything in YEARS. This idea has been bouncing around in my head for days, thus "the trilogy was born". This is meant to be Part One of a three part series, based on different songs from the musical Hadestown. I've obviously written this with very very dark interpretations of the songs and the themes. If enough people like it, I'll post parts two and three. Please let me know if it's any good, I'd love some feedback :)

AO3

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Dune properties, characters, or storylines-- nor do I own anything related to Hadestown. The images used in this are not my own, and any similarities to stories other than what I derive inspiration from are strictly coincidence.

What’s the use of his backbone

If he never stands upright?

“We welcome you to Kolhar, my lords Baron and na-Baron. Our House humbly offers our services and facilities to your use. I toast to our continued cooperation and to the strength of our Houses.”

As your father raised his cup, others of our House followed suit. The official welcome feast was well underway, though House Harkonnen had been planetside for at least a week already. The past few days had been for inspecting our mines and factories, ensuring that our production of their ships and swords were up to standard.

Now? Pure pageantry. You found it a bit redundant, but it was necessary to ensure your good standing among the Houses of the Imperium. It was a grand occasion, in which the leaders of your father’s council were present, as well as the highest ranked mine workers.

The doors to the large hall slam open, a familiar figure storming in. Your heart flutters at the sight of your beloved parting the crowds before him. The man who you had met by complete coincidence, one of the workers in a local steel mine, who you had spent the better part of a year meeting in secret—had crashed the court. You noticed a bruise growing on his cheek and blood trickling down his temple, indicating that his journey to enter through the doors was easier said than done. His voice soon bellowed throughout the hall.

“My Lord Duke, I refuse to let your daughter’s hand be taken by the na-Baron. She cannot marry him.”

The crowd gasps, as do you. You had spent the past week showing the na-Baron Feyd-Rautha around the grounds, the training of your most fierce warriors, and the best of your planet’s culture. You had shared a laugh or two and shown your prowess as a leader. Yes, you’d spent quite a bit of time with him, but marriage? This was news to you.

You turn to your father, who gives you an apologetic grimace. Several Harkonnen guards step forward to seize the love of your life. You quickly stand to protest, but the na-Baron stops the guards in their track with a single snap of his fingers. He offers a hand to calm the crowd, an eerie stillness in his form.

“It is true, I have offered my hand to the Lady.”

I believe that with each other,

we are stronger than we know.

“There must be a way around this. Even if this is in defiance of the court, they can’t punish all of us! We work their mines; they couldn’t truly function without us. We are the ones who truly hold the power! I implore you to stand with me, show them our strength!”

Your love stands strong, chin raised in the crowd, voice pleading with his brothers and sisters to stand beside him. He was convinced that this moment could provide a great revelation, that somehow your situation was different. That the consensus of a crowd could make the na-Baron stand down. Surely, your story could convince even the coldest of hearts that love can conquer all. He must have some sentimentality that resonates within him.

That's one of the main reasons why you fell in love with him. He's always so full of hope. Always willing to see the world as it could be, in spite of the way that it actually is.

But you knew better.

“This is treason.” Someone whispers in the room. Murmurs of assent soon follow, and your heart drops. The crowd around him quickly dissipates, as if the mere act of touching him promises death.

And the ones who deal the cards

Are the ones who take the tricks

With their hands over their hearts

While we play the game they fix

You start to plead with your father to spare your lover. He doesn’t know any better, he wasn’t raised in the ways of politics or court. It’s purely out of his love and devotion to you, so please—

Feyd-Rautha stands up and the room is immediately devoid of sound. He cranes his neck to look at you.

“You love him?”

You swallow harshly, lifting your chin. “I do.” You went to your lover, making a bold statement in linking your fingers together. Presenting a united front. Hoping that somehow, your kind attitude the past week towards the na-Baron would allow this leniency.

A gleam flashes through his eyes, almost imperceptible. He gives a blackened smile, making show of placing his hand over his heart. Confusion fills you. He slithers down the steps towards the pair of you, boots echoing in the Feasting Hall, each step making your lover’s hand give a slight tremor. Your mind stands strong in its conviction, in the thought that you’ll have to fight for what you want. But a small tendril in the back of your mind gives the slightest hesitation. The smallest indication of hope. Maybe…

Piter leans towards his Baron, whispering concerns in his ears, but is quickly paused by the Baron’s hand. Vladimir gives a slow, menacing grin. He responds to his Mentat in a low voice,

“Don’t bother. You know that my nephew loves to play with his food.”

Is this how the world is?

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shardsofmarxx · 8 months

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Sleep Well | Spencer Reid x Fem! Reader

Criminal Minds songfic based on/inspired by the song Sleep Well by d4ad. Angst/fluff

Summary: After having an argument with Spencer, you storm to your hotel for the night so you can get some sleep and take your mind off the argument, but you end up having a bad nightmare and you don’t know who else to call… (Told from reader's POV)

Warnings: Nightmares, violence, argument, general CM themes. (Nothing too graphic.)

Word Count: 3.2K

A/N: My first fic!!! I'm so excited to start sharing my writing with you guys, and I really hope you all enjoy this fic! I'm planning on making songfics a regular thing on my blog, so feel free to request any songs you'd like me to write about in my ask box! (As well as any other things you'd like me to write about.)

As you were putting on your bulletproof vest in the conference room, you heard someone open the door. You looked over to see Spencer glaring over at you, his bulletproof vest already on.

“What are you doing?” he asked in an accusatory manner, clearly bothered by something.

You paused for a few moments, confused and taken aback by his tone. “I’m getting ready to head out with the rest of the team. Is something wrong?”

“What's wrong is that you're getting ready to go to the field when you know you're not supposed to.”

You let out a small sigh, realizing what this was about. Technically, he was right; you weren't allowed to be back in the field for another few days due to the ear injuries you sustained when a bomb went off a little too close for comfort during one of the BAU’s cases about a month ago. However, you were very careful in your day-to-day life, and the doctor said you were making rapid progress in terms of your healing.

“Spence, I only have a handful of days left, and considering the kind of unsub we're dealing with, I'm sure it's fine.” You paused for a few moments before continuing. “Plus, I have earplugs,” you said while turning your head in both directions so he could see them. Unfortunately, he still wasn't convinced.

“It doesn't matter, Y/N; you haven't been cleared by a doctor yet, so you can't go out into the field. You should just focus your attention here,” he said while pointing at all the photos and paperwork sprawled around us in the conference room. “You should look it over; there might’ve been something we missed.”

You raised your eyebrows at him and let out a snort. “That's the best excuse you have, Spence? I appreciate the concern, but I'm going. This unsub is highly dangerous, and we need all the help we can get.”

"No, you're not,” he replied sternly.

“Who died and made you Unit Chief?” you scoffed, feeling your annoyance growing. “I'm going with you guys, whether you like it or not. I'm a grown woman, and I can handle myself just fine.

Although Spencer had a tendency to be stubborn, his behavior right now was foreign. You began walking toward the door, and just as you were about to grip the doorknob, you felt Spencer’s firm grasp wrap around your wrist. You looked over to see him staring at you coldly.

“Y/N, you're not going. I can't let you put yourself in danger.”

You suddenly felt your blood boil. Who did he think he was to act like this? To grab you and order you around? Treat you like you didn't know how to take care of yourself?

You snatched your wrist away and quickly turned to face him. "Actually, Reid, I'm going to go wherever I please, seeing as you have no authority over me whatsoever.” You were silent for a few moments until the perfect remark suddenly came to mind. “Somebody obviously needs to work on respecting boundaries,” you said slyly, opening up the door to leave, but he spoke up, stopping you in your tracks once more.

"Well, somebody obviously needs to work on following orders,” he muttered.

That was it. Your annoyance and anger finally bubbled over, and you lost it. You both began going back and forth, snapping snarky remarks at one another with no mercy whatsoever, your words piercing each other like knives.

“You just can't put aside your fucking stubbornness for the good of the team, can you, Reid?”

You could tell that those words hit him hard because from one moment to the next, his whole demeanor changed. “I can't put aside my stubbornness?” He said quietly, breathing shakily as he did.

He spoke up once more, this time at a much louder volume. “You're the one who can't put aside your stubbornness, Y/N! You can't admit the fact that you're not currently fit to do your job, and your stupidity is putting yourself and the entire team at risk!”

You begin to open your mouth, ready to retort, but he cuts you off. “Face it, Y/N, you're weak!” He was practically screaming at this point, the veins in his neck sticking out as they pulsed rapidly. Suddenly all you heard was a sharp ringing, and you fell to the floor, tightly clutching your ears in an attempt to make it stop. As if on cue, Derek ran in to diffuse the situation.

Caught up in his anger, Spencer spoke again, still yelling. “See?! This is what I'm talking about. If you can't handle me raising my voice, how are you going to go in the-”

“Reid!” Derek yelled, your whole body wincing as he did.

“Give it a rest; can't you see she's in pain?” He said harshly, turning his attention back to you immediately. He helped you stand up, and you quietly thanked him before turning to Reid.

“Well, you got what you wanted,” you said softly as you removed your bulletproof vest. “Good luck out there, Dr. Reid.” Your tone was full of dejection and defeat as you placed the vest on the table. You didn't even bother looking at him or Derek as you walked out of the conference room, through the bullpen, and out of the precinct.

You ended up walking outside for a while before deciding to actually head to the hotel. The night air soothed your soul and brought you comfort as you wandered the streets aimlessly. However, you knew you couldn't stay out there forever, no matter how much you wanted to.

When you walked into your hotel room, you placed your stuff down on a small lounge chair and flopped onto your bed, letting out a large sigh. You remembered you had turned your phone off once you walked out of the precinct since you desperately needed space, so you grabbed it out of your bag and turned it back on just to make sure you hadn’t missed anything important.

You had a few missed calls from Derek and Garcia, along with a text from Hotch.

“Take the night off. We'll talk first thing tomorrow morning.”

You let out a groan, knowing what that message entailed. You decided to shower before heading to bed, hoping the water would cleanse you of what you were feeling.

You step into the shower and are welcomed by warm water, instantly feeling at ease as it falls on your cool skin. Unfortunately, the feeling doesn't last long as your mind wanders back to the argument. You didn't understand why Spencer was so frustrated, so stubborn, and so mean to you. His words continued to echo in your head, and you eventually broke down, bawling your eyes out from the sheer pain you felt inside. The fact that he called you weak shattered your heart into a million tiny pieces. You guys had been close friends for years, and that's what he thought of you? Really? You felt stupid and betrayed, especially because you've had a huge crush on him for years now. All that love, care, and admiration felt like it amounted to nothing now.

Wanting to just put this awful night to end, you turned off the shower and continued getting ready for bed. You grabbed your pajamas out of your go-bag and lazily went through the rest of your nighttime routine. You then walked out of the bathroom and dropped on the bed in defeat, falling asleep as soon as you slipped under the covers.

You and Spencer walked quietly through the dark warehouse, the cool, eerie air causing goosebumps to rise on your skin. You scanned the hallway with your flashlights and guns in hand, only to be met with nothing in each room you had checked. You reached the end of the hallway and slowly moved your hand over to twist the doorknob before you heard Spencer yell from the room behind you.

“Y/N!!! Hel-!”

You raced to him only to find the unsub holding him at gunpoint. Spencer had a few cuts on his face, probably from being pistol whipped.

“Drop the gun right now, or I will shoot,” you said sternly, aiming your pistol right at his head.

“Ah, not quite! Place your weapon over on that table, or your lovely partner here gets a bullet to the brain,” he spoke, motioning his gun over to the small wooden table to your left. Having no other choice, you walked over and placed your gun on the table, turning back around to face the unsub.

“Good girl! Now, allow me to take care of one small thing before we begin,” he said, directing his attention to Spencer. He hit Spencer over the head with his gun, using as much force as he could muster. Spencer immediately dropped to the floor, and you screamed.

“Shhh, don't fret, darling; now the real fun can begin,” he said as he slowly walked over to you. His ominous tone sent chills down your spine.

“You see, the only reason any of this happened..." He paused for a few moments, looking you dead in the eyes as he said his next words, “is because you're weak.” Immediately, he swung his gun across your face, causing you to fall to the floor. He began kicking you, yelling at you as each kick landed.

“You're” kick “just” kick “a weak” kick “bitch.”

Your whole body writhed in pain, praying one of your teammates would come to rescue you and Spencer. As the unsub continued, all you could do was look at Spencer and feel flooded with guilt.

After what seemed like forever, the unsub brought the beatings to a halt and proceeded to walk back over to Spencer.

“And now, the grand finale!”

You used all your force to croak out a small “no” as you watched him stand behind Spencer and inch the gun towards his head, preparing to shoot him. He cocked the gun and then turned to face you.

“Remember, this is all happening because you're a weak FBI agent who couldn't do her job,” he said coldly. “The only reason I'm keeping you alive is so that you can watch this and know that it's nobody's fault but yours. Your weakness is to blame, and your consequence is to live with the guilt of your mistakes.” You watched him bring the gun to Spencer’s head and pull the trigger as you wailed.

Suddenly, you were back in the hotel room, your clothes soaked with sweat. You were shaking like a leaf and rapidly hyperventilating, feeling like your heart was going to burst out of your chest from how hard and fast it was beating.

You instinctively reached for your phone and called Spencer, your heart rate increasing each time the phone rang.

Suddenly, it stopped.

“Hey Y/N.”

As his words echoed through your head, you felt a sense of both relief and dread. You realized that you had just had a terrible nightmare and that Spencer was completely fine. However, you were also immediately reminded of the argument you had with him earlier and suddenly froze.

“Y/N? Are you there?” Spencer spoke once more, only to be met by silence.

“Y/N, is everything alright?”

Not knowing what to do, you hung up the phone and threw it across the room, sinking back into the covers almost immediately. You couldn't believe that this night had somehow managed to get worse. You wanted to scream as you felt the tears creep up behind your eyes, feeling absolutely helpless and worthless.

You felt weak, just like Spencer said you were.

You let out soft sobs into your pillow, not knowing what else to do with all the emotional turmoil stewing inside you. You thought about calling Garcia or Derek, but quickly realized they'd be either working or asleep, and bothering them was the last thing you wanted to do right now. You continued to cry, hoping you'd tire yourself out and eventually fall asleep between sobs.

Surprisingly, you actually ended up falling asleep, but it didn't last long. You were suddenly awoken by a series of knocks on your door, the noise causing you to sit up in bed. You sat in silence for a few seconds, staring at the door and wondering if you had just imagined the noise. You knew you were wrong when you heard a few more knocks, along with Spencer’s soft voice.

“Y/N?” knock. knock. knock. “Please let me in; I want to talk.”

You were in shock. Why was he at your hotel room so late at night? You felt your heart race and your body shake as you tried to figure out what to do. You knew you two had to talk at some point, and you did really miss him, but you didn't want him to see you. Not like this. Your eyes were red, puffy, and swollen from all the crying; your hair was messy; and you were wearing an old baggy t-shirt and shorts.

Basically, you looked like crap.

Despite all this, you knew you had to let him in. You reluctantly got out of bed and approached the door, twisting the handle and slowly opening the door to meet Spencer’s eyes.

He quickly rushed into the room, his urgency taking you by surprise. Once he was inside and had put his stuff down, he began examining every inch of you with an intense, worried gaze. He could tell you were in pain, and the worst part was that he knew it was his fault.

"Reid,” you croaked, clearing your throat before continuing your sentence. “What are you doing here?”

He began fidgeting with his fingers, thinking of a reply. He looked so meek compared to the argument earlier.

“You called a little while ago,” he said softly. “I spoke multiple times, and you never said a word. I had tried calling you afterwards, and you wouldn't answer.” His eyes met mine. “I was worried about you.”

“Well, as you can see, I'm perfectly fine, so you can leave now.”

“Y/N, please-” You cut him off before he could finish his sentence.

“Reid, it's late. You need to leave” you said sternly, swallowing your tears as you practically pushed him toward the door.

Before you could open the door, you felt him wrap his arms around you, causing you to freeze. He began to speak, practically whispering in your ear.

“Y/N, please. I can tell you're not okay, and I know I'm to blame. Let me make it right, please."

Maybe it was how distraught and desperate he sounded as he spoke, or maybe it was because you were finally in his warm embrace after missing him for so long, but you couldn’t hold back your tears any longer. Spencer just held you as you cried softly, trying to comfort you any way he could while he waited for you to calm down.

“Can we go to the bed, please?” you requested softly.

Spencer gave you a small nod with a weak smile. “Of course, Y/N.”

You walked over and laid down on the bed, shifting your body away from the edge of the bed and then patting your hand down on the empty space, urging Spencer to follow suit. He took off his shoes and gently laid down next to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulder as you placed your head on his chest. The sound of his heartbeat soothed you as you listened to its echo in his chest.

“So why did you end up calling tonight?” He asked softly, running his hands through your hair as he spoke.

You took a deep breath before answering, doing your best to maintain your composure, or whatever you had left of it.

“I, um, had a nightmare. We were on a case and…” Your voice trailed as the nightmare flooded your thoughts. “It was a bad one. I had to make sure you were okay, so I called you as soon as I had woken up. Once I heard your voice, I was reminded of our argument from earlier and realized I just had a nightmare, and I froze.”

You then explained the entire nightmare in detail, a few tears escaping your eyes as that horrid scene replayed in your head. Spencer just listened the whole time as he held you, stroking your hair or holding you a little tighter at times while you spoke.

Once you finished, he opened his mouth to speak. “Y/N… I'm so sorry. I never wanted to argue with you; I just couldn’t handle the thought of you getting hurt again, and I snapped.” His voice was shaky as he spoke.

“I thought I had lost you in the bombing, and I couldn't let you get hurt again, not if I could do something about it. I care about you too much to let you get hurt again.” He paused for a few moments before continuing. "But I spiraled, and I was wrong. I ended up hurting you anyway.”

You opened your mouth to speak, but he began talking again before you could even get a syllable out.

“You're not weak; you're one of the strongest people I know. You're strong, brave, and courageous, and I admire you so much.” His voice began to choke. “I never wanted you to think you're weak because you're so far from it. I'm so, so sorry."

Now, you were both crying in each other's arms, holding each other tightly as you each whispered words of comfort into the other’s ear in between your sobs. At one point, you both coincidentally lifted your heads up and locked eyes with each other, causing both of you to laugh at how much of a wreck both of you looked.

“We look like shit,” you said, catching your breath from that sudden fit of laughter.

“Yeah, we sure do.”

Spencer’s gaze suddenly changed, and he had a similar look of sadness from earlier as he spoke his next words. “Well, I should probably get going, shouldn’t I?” He got up, but you reached for his wrist before he could go too far.

“Um, this is probably wildly unprofessional and all, but could you spend the night with me, Spence?” You could feel the blush on your face burn your skin as you waited for his response.

“Of course, Y/N. I’d love to stay the night,” he replied warmly, bringing a smile to your face.

You both went into the bathroom and got yourselves cleaned up. Spencer changed into his pajamas and quickly joined you in bed. He laid down and wrapped his arms around your waist, tucking his head into your shoulder, right by your ear. Just as you were dozing off, you heard him murmur something into your ear.

“I love you, Y/N.”

You suddenly felt your whole body get hot and instantly turned around, wondering if you were just hearing things.

“What did you say, Spencer?”

“I said I love you. I love you and care about you so much, and from now on, I’m going to spend every second of every day loving you, no matter what.” He planted a small kiss on your forehead after he spoke, pulling you into his chest and wrapping you tightly in his long arms. He felt so warm, so comfortable, and so right. You felt like you could just melt into his arms and become a part of him. You knew you belonged in his arms.

“I love you too, Spencer. Sleep well,” you whispered softly, nuzzling your head deeper into his chest before finally drifting off to sleep.

Thanks so much for reading!

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catalinaromanoff · 1 month

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silence

wandanat x mute reader

summary: your girlfriends are always there for you and the only people who truly understand you.

warnings: mentions of abuse, panic attack

мой сладкий (moy sladkiy) = my sweet

красивая девушка (krasivaya devushka) = beautiful girl

inspired by the song: (not a songfic tho)

you hadn’t always been mute. in fact, up until you were six years old, your parents couldn’t get you to shut up. your teachers up until you were mute would complain about how disruptive you were and how nothing could get done in your presence.

maybe that was the reason you went mute. maybe not. who knows? all you know is that one day you no longer wanted anything to do with this wretched and cruel world. and so, you stopped talking.

at first your parents had tried everything they could to get you to utter just one simple word like “hi” or “goodbye.” all attempts failed. you just weren’t interested.

eventually, they gave up. they shipped you away, labeling you a ‘freak’ and ‘unlovable’ to the extravagant foster home you would spend the next twelve years in. sure, they didn’t care about you, but they still had money and if they were going to send a child away they wanted to say it was ‘the best foster home in the nation.’

what a lie.

this ‘foster home’ resembled the red room. thousands of girls trained to be cold-blooded killers. they like you. a lot. they liked your silence and the way you carried yourself. slowly you climbed up the ranks and became one of their best spies at the ripe age of fourteen. you didn’t know why you were so compliant. it could’ve possibly been because of your disinterest. you didn’t care if you were the best or the worst. you just went through the motions.

one could guess those motions led you to be one of the best assassinators, rivaling the black widow. until she joined the avengers.

you remember the day the black widow was no longer one of you. no longer an assassinator, except looking to stop them. your superiors were furious and scared. that was the scariest day of your life. after the black widow’s change of teams, the ‘white spies’ as your organization would call you all, were abused and treated horribly.

one night in particular you had failed to follow their instructions. an assassination gone wrong. you were sixteen, for goodness sake. they asked you if you had anything to say for yourself, obviously you didn’t. you were mute. they knew this. and yet, they put you through hours of torture. you were beat, thrown around, and-

suddenly you shoot up and sit up straight in your bed. you let out a gut-wrenching sob. you’re shaking. where are you? are they coming to get you?

without warning you feel a hand on your arm. you’re now scrambling out of bed, shaking, and screaming at this unknown person to not touch you. what if they hurt you?

the lights come on and you slowly realize where you are. you’re not a white spy anymore. you’re apart of the avengers, and have two wonderful girlfriends. you try to stop the shaking and the panic but you simply can’t. not without them.

“honey.. can i touch you?”

you hear wanda’s gravely morning voice and nod your head yes immediately. she gets up from your shared bed and slowly approaches you. suddenly you realize you have backed yourself into a corner.

wanda finally reaches your position and sits down across from you. she holds her hands out for you to grab, which you immediately do.

“i want you to breath with me, okay мой сладкий?”

you nod your head and follow her breathing.

in, 1, 2, 3,

hold, 1, 2, 3,

out, 1, 2,3,

you continue repeating this until you eventually calm down. no more shaking, your thoughts are under control, but now you know you won’t be able to head back to bed. not like this.

“another dream about them, huh?”

nat speaks up from her spot in the bed. she’s sitting on the edge and had been carefully observing you and wanda. you don’t like this distance and so you signal her to come over.

you sign to her: to answer your question, yes.

you had learned sign language as you grew up. having technology and the internet at your disposal allowed you to spend all day and all night constantly learning the intricate language. at first you began with finger spelling but slowly moved on to more advanced gestures. unfortunately, not a lot of people know sign language.

in fact, when you had first been recruited to join the avengers, you had almost been fired. no one knew how to communicate with you and assholes from the lower ranks complained about having to learn the sign language alphabet in order to ‘talk’ to you. however director fury did not want to fire you. so he appointed a deaf S.H.I.E.L.D. intern to teach weekly sign language classes.

so here you are. communicating with your girlfriends through your language.

nat smiles sadly at your response.

“it’s been getting worse lately, hasn’t it?”

you slowly nod your head. of course they would notice. you barely slept anymore. you felt like a zombie.

“is there anything i can do? maybe i can try to use my powers to calm your brain down?”

you shake your head.

i need to get over this on my own. last time we used your powers the nightmares came back worse.

wanda sighs and frustratedly runs her hand through her hair. nat wraps her arm around her waist and pulls her closer. you continue to hold her right hand.

“i just hate seeing you like this.”

i know.

you smile sadly and pull wanda in for a hug. after a while you share a hug with natasha.

we’ll get through this.

nat nods her head and smiles at me.

“you’re so strong.”

you begin to blush and hide your face in your hands.

you hear wanda’s infectious laugh as they watch you get flustered over nat’s compliment.

“oh cmon красивая девушка, we wanna see your face. you’re cute when you’re flustered.”

you giggle and stiffen your arms up when nat reaches over and tries to pry your hands from your face.

“okay, guess we’ll have to do this the hard way.”

suddenly you feel two pairs of hands begin to tickle you every which way. you can barely contain my loud laughter. you kick at the hands in order to get them away but to no avail. eventually you give up and take your hands away from your face.

the tickles finally stop and you continue to giggle, out of breath.

i love you two so much.

nat and wanda smile.

we love you too. way more than you know.

you don’t even realize they signed until a few seconds later. it wasn’t even finger spelling — it was actual sign language! you feel your eyes well up with tears. you pull both of your girlfriends into a bone-crushing hug. you let out a watery laugh.

“we decided to learn sign language. no more finger spelling.”

you nod and squeal. you feel seen.

for the first time in your life, you feel like no one is trying to change you. not one, but two people accept you for you are and are willing to learn your language. for the first time since you were six, you don’t feel disconnected from the world.

you feel truly loved.

a/n: honestly i wasn’t expecting to write again today but i read something on here a long time ago that made it back to the front of my brain. but yea, i hope you enjoyed if you made it this far!

#Spotify #marvel #mcu #marvel mcu #wandavision #wanda x reader #wanda x you #wanda marvel #wanda maximoff #natasha x y/n #natasha x you #natasha x reader #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff #wandanat #wandanat x reader

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tearsstained · 2 months

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Tell me that you love me again - Luke Castellan Headcanons

Headcanons of how Luke Castellan fell in love with the ridiculed Hades kid based on the song 'Again' by Noah Cyrus

POC friendly, plus size friendly, gender neutral, Hades!Reader, can either be read as Disney Luke or book Luke.

Content warnings: Not proof read, angst, Stoll brothers, alcohol (mentioned), Lukes betrayal, Reader going on a quest, the master bolt quest, strangers to friends to dating, virginity lose (mentioned), sex (mentioned), death/sacrifice, war (mentioned), Kronos (mentioned), spoilers for the Last Olympians, Lukes death, Percy Jackson (mentioned), song lyrics used, songfic.

Navigation | Masterlist | L.C Masterlist

"You just made the worst mistake."

"And you'll regret it, darling."

Luke! Who was known as the camp's golden boy and admired by everyone for his charm and talent.

Luke! Who never really had any romantic interests and no experience with love.

Luke! Who despite having girls flocking to him daily, never dated because he never found anyone intriguing enough to think about.

Luke! Who had only heard of you through other campers and never really paid a thought to you until he saw you.

Luke! Who met you randomly on a Thursday afternoon when you were chilling out with the Stoll brothers.

Luke! Who was captivated by your beauty when he first saw you and mistaked you for an Aphrodite kid.

Luke! Who discovered that Travis and Connor are your only friends.

Luke! Who made the worst mistake by asking the Stoll's about you.

Luke! Who then got bombarded with questions and poking assumptions by T&C.

Luke! Who eventually admitted to being interested in getting to know you and got absolutely blackmailed by it.

"Cause once you give and then you take."

"You'll only end up wanting."

Luke! Who made a deal with the brothers that if they introduce him to you, he'll let them bring proper alcohol into camp for bonfire nights.

Luke! Who was unrealistically determined to know you.

Luke! Who became obsessed with the thought of you despite barely knowing you.

Luke! Who finally met you at a bonfire night after being taunted by your presence in the Hermes cabin.

Luke! Who never got enough time to talk to you.

Luke! Who felt teased by your short meeting and only wanted more.

Luke! Who searched for you all around camp the next day but never found you once.

Luke! Who continued searching for you throughout the next several weeks just to only see you at the mess hall where you couldn't talk.

Luke! Who begged the Stoll brothers to tell him your schedule or where you hang out at.

Luke! Who only got a "deal's over, can't tell." in response.

"Was everything hard enough?"

"Cause one day you'll wake up."

"And then you'll say."

Luke! Who found you on your own at the docks before asking if he could join you.

Luke! Who internally freaked out when you accepted but played it off.

Luke! Who got to know you more and became friends on that dock.

Luke! Who genuinely laughed at every dark joke you said that would scare most people.

Luke! Who kept meeting up with you whenever you were both free at the dock, claiming it was 'our spot' now.

Luke! Who offered to teach you how to swim and help improve your sword fighting skills.

Luke! Who started joining in on your little hangouts with Travis and Connor in the Hermes cabin.

Luke! Who started meeting up with you in the Hades cabin and began having sleepovers together secretly.

Luke! Who slowly but surely became one of your best friends.

Luke! Who became too attached to you.

“I wanna be your lover."

"I don't wanna be your friend.”

Luke! Who had a painfully noticeable crush on you but somehow you didn't see it.

Luke! Who started hanging out with you a lot more and built a much stronger connection with you then Travis and Connor had.

Luke! Who got jealous when you were with T&C but tried to remind himself that you aren't together and can hangout with whoever.

Luke! Who defended your name when other campers were talking about how weird you were and how they believed you were the lighting thief - when in reality it was him.

Luke! Who heard from the Stolls' that you liked him but thought he didn't like you back.

Luke! Who then arranged a sleepover in your cabin and asked you out that night.

"You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear."

"So tell me that you love me again."

Luke! Who cherished every moment with you because he knew he'd have to go soon.

Luke! Who wanted to hide you away from the upcoming war none of the campers knew of but couldn't.

Luke! Who kept acting normal, even when Percy Jackson arrived.

Luke! Who showed Percy around and built a big brother relationship with him.

Luke! Who was the first to bow when Percy was claimed as Poseidon's son.

Luke! Who heard from Percy that you were also forced to go on the quest to retrieve the Masters Bolt (that he stole) due to being a child of Hades.

Luke! Who has never been so disappointed of not being chosen to go on a quest before until now.

Luke! Who begged Chiron to go as well to protect you from the set up danger he knew of but was continuously denied.

Luke! Who told you he loved you for the first time before you left.

"Baby, I'll hold my breath."

"You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear."

"So tell me that you love me again."

Luke! Who dreamed of you every night and prayed you were okay every day.

Luke! Who realized how deeply in love he was with you and wanted to recruit you to Kronos army so you could be together without worrying.

Luke! Who could only hope you would return to camp unharmed.

Luke! Who was ecstatic when the four of you came back mostly unharmed but also realized his cover would be blown soon.

Luke! Who harboured your last night together before he was revealed.

"Again, babe, again."

"You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear."

"So tell me that you love me again."

Luke! Who couldn't stop repeating the three words he only told you once before

Luke! Who seemed oddly clingy but you brushed it off as making up for missed time.

Luke! Who was almost in tears several times while kissing all over your body and repeating those three words to you.

Luke! Who took your virginity that night since he knew he might never see you again.

Luke! Who worshipped you all night and was so gentle with you.

Luke! Who broke your heart the next day.

"Ooh, she's screaming in my head."

"Ooh, I left her where I slept."

"Somewhere, I can't escape from, I'm running from myself."

"Somewhere in between in love and broken, I'm in hell."

Luke! Who felt horrible for betraying you like this but wanted to get revenge on the gods.

Luke! Who offered to protect you if you joined him, only to end up getting denied and screamed at.

Luke! Who couldn't turn back now that he outted himself, so he went through the portal alone.

Luke! Who was haunted by your face every night and day.

Luke! Who never stopped loving you, even if you were on different sides.

"Saying I wanna be your lover, I don't wanna be your friend."

"You don't know what you got 'til it's gone my dear."

"So tell me that you love me again."

Luke! Who replayed every memory of you together in his head during the days now that he's away from you.

Luke! Who missed you severely but couldn't go back to camp now.

Luke! Who was happy with getting his revenge but regretted it as well.

Luke! Who thought of those harsh words you yelled at him that night and how he just wanted to hear you say 'I love you' again.

Luke! Who desired a future with you but could only fantasize about it.

Luke! Who knew you hated him but still kept loving you.

"You'll leave when the clock hits ten."

"You don't know what you got 'til it's gone, my dear."

"So tell me that you love me again."

Luke! Who despite not seeing you for years, instantly recognized you when he saw you with Percy and Annabeth.

Luke! Who just wanted to stop Kronos to prove himself to you even if it meant dying.

Luke! Who just wanted you to love him again, even a little bit.

Luke! Who sacrificed himself to end Kronos just for you to know that he regrets it and wishes things were still normal like at camp all those years ago.

Luke! Who died for your unreciprocated love.

#luke castellan x reader #luke castellan headcanons #luke castellan x you #luke castellan #percy jackson and the olympians x reader #luke castellan x hades!reader #hades!reader #luke castellan pjo #luke castellan imagine #luke castellan angst #pjo x reader #pjo luke castellan #percy jackson #charlie bushnell #charlie bushnell x reader

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idkwhatever580 · 4 months

Text

Always remember the things she said

Masterlist

Based on the song “as good a reason” by Paris Paloma (the girl who wrote “labor”)

Pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader | Wanda maximoff x reader!platonic\older sister vibes | Wanda maximoff x Natasha romanoff!platonic\older sister vibes again

Prompt: two occasions happen where Natasha and y/n give their sisterly advice to Wanda, and she’s the first one to connect the dots.

Warnings: swearing, songfic

A/N: guys I love a good songfic. this is giving me life right now btw. I’m living for this song.

Here’s the song if you want to listen. It’s not important that you hear it but it’s soooo good

Wanda and Pietro just joined the team.

Of course Pietro was busy recovering from almost bleeding out, and Wanda was getting tested for her abilities.

After most of the screenings were done she was pretty tired. And you were there to help her settle in.

You went with her to the party that night since Tony used their presence as a good reason to celebrate.

Wanda had sat next to you the whole night almost as you were elegant and beautiful in your own right. And you knew it. Suddenly she speaks up after not having said much more than a peep all night.

“You really know what you’re doing.”

“Hm?”

“I mean. You look like you love yourself so much and it’s attractive to everyone. It draws eyes towards you. The way you carry yourself”

You smile and thank her and nod your head.

“I didn’t always know how to own the room.”

She turns her head and says

“When did you change? Or become like this?”

You smile and say

“Can I tell you a story?”

She nods interested now.

You sit back as you recall that fateful night.

“One night. I was at a party not unlike this one.”

Wanda nods along and you start

“I met a woman with lips so red. A face so lined like spider webs. I’ll always remember the things she said. They were so wise, she opened my eyes and they’ll never close again.”

Wanda asked

“What’d she say? What did she do?”

You smile at her innocence and intrigue

“Oh how she sighed when she stubbed her cigarette. I felt compelled to enquirer of her success. ‘How do you do, how can you be so in love with yourself? Tell me please cause I need help’”

I smile at my youthful innocence and say

“I was just like you in that moment I guess. Which is why I’m telling you this story.”

Wanda is already on the edge of her seat.

“She said… ‘Every time you are succeeding there’s an old man somewhere seething, and spite’s as good a reason to take his power. When you hate the body you are in, oh love, you’re acting just for him as he counts his gold and green in his ivory tower.’”

I take a sip of my drink and say

“I was being manipulated by one of my exes. And she helped me realize I didn’t even like him and I freed myself from his grasp with her help. ‘Our fear it lines his pockets love, so take that rage and bottle up and put a drop into his cup of wine. You don’t need him you don’t need me. With that poisoned bottle you’ll be free, but be damn sure you don’t mix it up with mine.’”

I smile at Wanda’s face. She’s incredibly sweet.

“What happened to the woman?”

I chuckle and say

“Well, I did exactly what she said not to do”

Wanda furrows her eyebrows and says

“What? But you’re doing what she said to do right now yes?”

I smile and say

“Partially. See. The first part I listened to yes. But the second part. I didn’t listen so good.”

Wanda tilts her head slightly and says

“What did you do?”

“I mixed my poison with hers. But not in the way you might think. I simply fell in love with her”

Her eyes widen and she’s on the edge of her seat

“What happened to her though?”

I smile and say

“We got married.”

Wanda looks shocked and she says

“You’re married?!”

I hush her and say

“Yes but not many people know. It’s to keep her safe in a way. Being an avenger is risky. I wouldn’t want the love of my life to get hurt now would I?”

Wanda shakes her head and we continue on with the night without another question.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Wanda has been with the avengers for a few months now and she’s been adjusting perfectly.

She is like family to them and she is at a gala sitting next to Natasha. You were drug off by Tony to talk to people. And to pass the time Wanda says

“Tell me a story.”

Natasha raises a brow and says

“A story?”

Wanda nods her head and says

“Like. Something that has happened to you that you’ve never told someone. That has a meaning behind it I guess. I guess what I’m asking is tell me a story and give me advice as well”

Natasha smiles when she pictures the perfect memory in her head.

“I’ve got a story. A few years ago I was at a party.”

Wanda nods along

“I met a young girl with eyes so bright. She was already getting sick of life. She had this boy who was controlling her basically. Her arms were laden with his merchandise. She asked me why I no longer try and waste my time and I said ‘spite’”

With a smirk Natasha continues

“I said… ‘Cause every time you are succeeding. There’s an old man somewhere seething, and spite’s as good a reason to take his power. When you hate the body you are in, oh love, you’re acting just for him as he counts his gold and green in his ivory tower.”

Wanda furrows her eyebrows as she recognizes those words.

“‘Our fear it lines his pockets love so take that rage and bottle up and put a drop into his cup. You don’t need him you don’t need me, with that poisoned bottle you’ll be free, but be damn sure you don’t mix it up with mine.”

Wanda mumbles the last words trying to recall where she had heard it before

“Be damn sure you don’t mix it up with mine”

When she makes the connection she says

“And then you ended up marrying her!”

Natasha furrows her eyebrows in shock and she says in a hushed tone

“How did you know that?”

Wanda responds

“She told me”

“Y/n told you that we’re married? We agreed to not tell anyone without each others consent.”

Wanda shakes her head.

“She told me her point of view of that exact moment and said ‘I met a woman with lips so red. Always remember the things she said’ and I remembered that she said that she married the woman but she didn’t tell me anything else. And I put two and two together and boom baby!”

Natasha smiles and says

“You’re the first person to figure it out. It’s funny because I told her not to mix our poisons and we did”

Wanda smiles and says

“I think you work well together. Like your poisons complement each others.”

Natasha smiles and says

“Thank you. And good job at remembering the woman’s words”

She smirks and Wanda giggles.

You finally break free from the people talking to you and you immediately make your way over to Natasha and Wanda and say

“Up to no good?”

Nat turns around and says

“Actually. Wanda has something she’d like to tell you”

You look at her waiting for her to say it and she gets all shy

“Um. I know who the woman with lips so red is”

Your eyebrows raise in surprise and you say

“Nat? Did you tell her?”

Nat shakes her head and she says

“She figured it out all by herself. She’s a smart one”

You nod your head and say

“I always knew she was smarter than she let on. Congrats on being the first to find out.”

Wanda nods her head and she says

“You shouldn’t hide it. I think you would be New Yorks top power couple”

You sigh and say

“It’s for our own protection. If we were to let that out someone might use us against the other”

Wanda nods and says

“But you have each other. You know you’ll come for each other. You know every avenger would drop everything to help you”

I nod and say

“You’re right. Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad to soft launch”

Nat smiles and says

“Let’s do it”

I grab my ring from my necklace that keeps it there and I put it on my finger. As does Natasha and Wanda smiles and claps excitedly

“I feel like a proud sister!”

I smile and say

“Good. You are our sister.”

She smiles and says

“Slay”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Taglist

@ilovesnat @ihartnat @marvelnatasha12346 @moistblobfish @justarandomreaderxoxo

#natasha romanoff #fanfic #marvel #avengers #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #fanfiction #black widow #mcu #wanda maximoff

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thepeonysbackup · 7 months

Text

Cheek to Cheek

Summary: After a rough day, Alastor decides to take your happiness into his own hands, or moves to be precise!

Warnings: Fluff!! WIP!!!

Request: Yes/No

Songfic!!!: ♬♬♬

At this point, you were boring a line into the floor from how much your heels clicked against the tile flooring, only going quiet every few seconds you walked over your fuzzy white and purple rug. "She had the audacity to point that smug ass angelic weapon into my face while she was at it. Claiming I want to make trouble when all I've done for the hotel is support her girlfriend with everything I have?! Doesn't she realize that if I wasn't trying I would be out hopping rooftops, shoplifting, and running these streets lawless like how I was seven months ago?!" The soft hum from Alastor spurred you on to continue as you turned around again, this time stopping because you felt done, chest rising and falling while you stood relaxed. "Sounds to me like you were rather dreadful." That caught you off guard, "What..?"

The sudden flick of the radio dial, the click so loud it made you jump as the music started to play. Alastor's shadow smiled mischievously from the ceiling for its choice, as he stood he walked over to you with his eyes closed and smile ever present before he took hold of one of your hands and pulled you near.

'Heaven.. I'm in heaven... And my heart beats so– that I can hardly speak..

And I've seem to find the happiness I seek.. When we're out together, dancin' cheek to cheek.'

To your surprise, the steps were slow, merely the both of you slowly turning to the music and swaying with one another to the beat. His hand gently held yours, eyes now opened to stare intently down at you as he spoke, "My Dear, if I had ever met you while you were behaving in such a manner I promise you we would not have gotten off on the proper foot." His smile turned soft as he spun you and pulled you back into him, your back to his chest while he held your waist merely for a moment but long enough for his touch to be burned into your mind.

'I'm in Heaven, and the cares I had through the week, seems to vanish like a gamblers lucky streak.. When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek.

Oh I'd love to climb to mountains, reach the highest peak. But it doesnt thrill me half as much as dancin' cheek to cheek.

Oh I'd love to go out fishing, in a river or a creek, but I enjoy it half as much as dancin cheek to cheek.'

"Now Darlin' dance with me~ I want my arms around you, these chaaarms about you will carry me throoough, is heaven!~" He sang out, making you laugh a tad as he truly put in effort as he spun you out again, posing dramatically on one knee while pointing towards you. He wanted you to continue the second part, which since it was only the two of you, you obliged to. "Take it away doll, sing it!"

"Heavenn, I'm in heaven!~ And my heart beats so, that I can hardly speak~~

And I seem to find the happiness I seek, when we're out together dancing Cheek to cheek!!~"

He laughed along with you when you finished, gently pinching your cheek while leaning back down to your level as he did. "See that's the one right there," He mused with enthusiasm, quickly capturing your lips for a mere moment before pulling back with a wide grin on his face at you own genuine smile of disbelief, "That little one right there most definitely is my favorite, please wear it more often dear. A dance will always bring out a smile, never hesitate to seek me out if ever you are in need of one again, my darlin'. Til we meet again." And with that he was gone in the flash of his shadow, slithering away under your doorway.

What just happened?

#hazbin hotel #hazbin alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #alastor x reader #alastor x you #alastor hazbin hotel #alastor #wips #wip

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kisscara · 2 years

Text

am i sinking or swimming? [scaramouche x gn!reader] ⎯⎯ fatui!scaramouche, angst, no comfort, toxic relationship, blood

songfic based off of late night drive home's song stress relief

his words shook you to your core.

this wasn't kunikuzushi. where did you go wrong? you stood by his side and felt his pain every time he lost a close one to him and yet he chose to turn into this... this monster. he was never home and whenever he was, he acted as if you didn't exist. he acted as if you were there for, what, emotional support?

scaramouche talked to you when he felt like it. when he felt like he was about to lose it, his mind flooding with the heart wrenching memories of them. it's always been them, but never you. why can't he see you? he says something along these lines during these moments. "(name), what do i do? i can't do this anymore."

were you his lover, or his therapist?

you gnaw down on your bottom lip, restraining pained sobs as you soothe your husband from behind him with your hands comfortingly rubbing his shoulders. "it's okay, kunikuzushi. you're okay, because i'm going to be here with you," you reassure him, planting a kiss against his tear stained face.

scaramouche's fist ball up the sheets of the bed as tears continue to pour from his eyes. without looking at you, he turns around and holds you in his embrace. "you won't leave me, right?" his voice is small and full of sorrow. one would think he was manipulating you in this situation and in this case, maybe he was.

your eyes widen. oh, oh no, what were you thinking? your poor lover was just in a hard place at the moment, so of course he holds mutual feelings for you, he's just feeling down! it's your job to help him find his happiness again and he'll go back to his old loving self.

his loving self...

it's stress relief from everything.

what exactly is his happiness? right, letting him take out his anger on you. after that, he'll definitely apologize and go back to loving you. he says the most hurtful things and his words slice like a blade. you could say that if his phrases were physically harming you, you'd be six feet under.

it's okay, because this is his way of coping. it's not the healthiest way, sure, but would you rather have the only important person to you feeling sad and lonely? no. no one would want that. you went through his mental abuse in a state of being completely lovesick with the man.

it will strengthen your bond with him and show him that you're never leaving, that he can finally put his trust in you and see you as his spouse. how much can you take though?

your friends always tell you stories about their spouse, from how they cook, to the type of plans they make for dates... it's endless. and whenever the conversation puts you on the spotlight, you're speechless. what would you tell them about your beloved kunikuzushi?

"he's sweet like usual..."

they would playfully laugh at your comment.

"that's what you said last time, (name)! come on, anything new? are you guys going on a date sometime?"

you simply shake your head and direct the topic of the conversation elsewhere.

tell me, tell me you love me.

you're on your knees of the living room in your shared house with scaramouche, hands against the floor as broken sobs break past your lips. how long have you been holding this in? how long... has he been holding back the urge to hurt you?

scaramouche blankly stares at the hand that roughly grabbed your arm before moving his gaze to your figure. his nails had dug deep into your flawless skin, creating bloody crescent marks. hesitant, he moves towards you with one step, and then two...

"sorry, (name), but i have to go back to my fatui duties."

of course. you'd expect nothing less of your loving husband. "is that all, kunikuzushi?" you croak out, voice scratchy from your cries. scaramouche narrows his eyes. "you were willing to take this head-on, weren't you? so take what you bargained for." his gaze lingers upon you for a few moments before he leaves the house.

you cry out in anguish. you aren't sure whether it's because of the pain he inflicted upon you, or the feeling of your heart being torn apart by his ruthless hands. you stagger to the kitchen, hastily running your wound beneath cold water and wincing at the sting. you wrap it with bandages and heave large breaths.

"i can't... i can't do this anymore!" you groan and wipe at your tears but they just kept on coming like an endless waterfall. "i've done all that i can for you, but i can't do this, kunikuzushi."

you were right all along. you're a toy to him. a toy to satisfy his greedy needs and wants as he lulled you into staying by triggering your guilt with his hypnotizing voice and solemn cries. you're a toy that he never cared for. but if that toy were to be taken from him, would he contemplate the way he treated it then?

come back, come back to haunt me.

scaramouche returned home with bandages. he just couldn't find the person he needed to put the bandages on. he wandered around the house for quite a while, thinking nothing of it. he brushes it off; you probably went down to inazuma city to see your friends.

he goes into the kitchen to put the bandages away, but finds an empty roll of bandages on the counter. oh. 'i guess they won't be needing this anymore then,' scaramouche thought to himself, putting the bandages into the cabinet and tossing the roll aside.

scaramouche goes back outside and decides to wait for you. he hopefully removes his hat from his head so you could see his face first thing when he caught you in sight.

soon enough, night falls. he rubs his eye with one hand, the other one sore and aching from holding his heavy hat. he won't go back inside until he's seen you. like any other dilemma the two of you had, he'll apologize and console you with his words as you fall asleep in his arms.

that day would never come for him, not again.

won't you, won't you let me be myself?

"have you seen..." his voice trails off when he realizes the looks of disgust your friends give him. his eyes go dark as they continue to whisper, acting as if he wasn't there.

"i feel bad for them but seriously, a harbinger?"

"it's fine, we should look after them. i'm glad they finally told us about him, it's no wonder they were so off lately."

scaramouche's shoulders sink. "s-so, you know where they are, right? can you please tell me, i just want to talk-" he's stammering in between gasps, not even realizing he's on the verge of bursting into tears. one of them grimaces at his look of agony. "leave them alone, you've done enough damage to them."

if scaramouche, had a heart, he swore it would have skipped a beat in that moment. "damage? no, no, you must be mistaken! i love them!" scaramouche's temper began to rise. who were they to tell him how you felt for him?

"stop it, please. they told us to tell you that they don't want to carry on with this relationship."

"archons, they were right, he really would chase after them. what a psycho..."

scaramouche felt the air knock out of his lungs almost instantly. 'they've got it all wrong, we're going to be okay, (name). i love you, i love you, i love you-' he stands there, watching your friends leave him heartbroken and in pain.

i was holding on but you didn't see my shots baby.

"i'm going to make it up to you, but i don't want to sleep alone." scaramouche whimpers to himself, curling into a pathetic position on the cold bed. his hands cover his ears as he shudders, startling from the booming noise of thunder and the creaking of the house.

his eyes are tightly shut, scared that if he opened them, he would see a horrid figure in the dark. what a child...

he blindly reaches around for your hand like he usually did, to tightly squeeze it to reassure him that you were there; you would keep him safe from any dangers within the night. you even said it yourself. "i may not have your strength, but i'm good at handling the night, alright? whatever scares you, i'll take care of you."

"take care of me, (name)... stay with me..."

all the times that I couldn't speak my thoughts well maybe.

at the tsaritsa's palace, scaramouche's fatui subordinates would be lying if they said the balladeer wasn't different. his eyes clearly showed signs of exhaustion and he was much too tired to even shout at them for a change. they thought he was a total ghost.

always moping around, mumbling your name and writing what seemed to be countless letters. it went from asking you about your day, to telling you about his day, to him writing paragraphs of apologies and so, so many 'i love you's.

whenever one of the fatui subordinates were in his office, he'd suddenly smile with empty eyes and ask, "do you have a partner or a spouse, perhaps?" scaramouche would lean back in his chair and add, "i have my own spouse. you see, they're very special because they love me even though i messed up a lot."

"i love them more than they love me. do you agree?" scaramouche would tilt his head and his aura sent shivers down the subordinate's spine. say no, he dares them.

for now, he hasn't chosen to send out a search party for you because he wanted to prove that he wasn't a psycho like your rude friend said. but still, the pain was eating away at him. every sleepless night and the guilt that was weighing him down was catching up to his mental health.

well this is what i wanted please don't feel so bad.

give him another chance. he's laying in bed and staring at the ceiling, mindlessly muttering, "our anniversary is soon. we can go anywhere you like. i have a special surprise too, so you better look forward to it and tonight, i can stay home. the tsaritsa told me to go on a break for today since..."

scaramouche turns on his side and closes his eyes. "i don't really know, but it's fine. we can have a date and i'll show all of your friends that i'm much more better than their spouses. or maybe, we can stay home and i'll cook for you. you never tasted my cooking before, but it's good, i promise you."

little conversations with no one. he hates the reality of his life and he wants nothing more than to be with you. he wouldn't care if you shouted at him or hurt him; seeing you was more than enough.

"you didn't like it when i talked about them, right? i'll talk about you, and only you this time, i promise..."

in love with a ghost please won't you come back...

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schoenpepper · 25 days

Text

River (Charlie Puth)

Intro: He doesn't understand why you keep getting closer and closer to him, even after all he's done. You don't understand why you love him, either.

Warnings: bad writing, awful grammar, not proofread it's too long for me to give a fuck, reader is like simp 100%, book 4-5 spoilers ig, not canon happenings huehuehue, kinda disconnected but like, all my songfics are disconnected so idk, i was half asleep writing the latter parts, so it'll be messy for sure

A/N: Jamil my babygirl~ The people don't enjoy my Twisted Harmonies series, but I don't care because I like writing them. This one went through a couple edits though.

Masterlist

Don't run from me river

Don't run from me river, river

No don't run from me river

Don't run from me river, river

Meeting Jamil was the start of living for you.

Coasting through life back in your old world; everyday was a chore you had to get through in order to continue existing. When you got magically transported to a place with magic and new cultures and new people, it was like you finally got back to the same starting point as everyone else.

But seeing those dark gray eyes and long brown tresses, it made your heart beat for the first time.

A beauty that seems to want to go unnoticed, but how could you ignore him when his radiance filled your very being as naturally as oxygen filled your lungs? When he hid in his mask of incompetence and facade of normalcy, what can you do but trip over your own feet and fall? You see him, and the only thing you want to do is to be closer to him, enough to peel back that visage of mystery, to read him like an open book. Jamil is like a mirage in the deserts of the Scalding Sands, however, you know that the moment you reach out to touch him, he’ll fade away right in front of you.

So you keep watching.

You can’t do anything but watch.

You watch him plot and plan and fall victim to his own schemes. You watch him boil together the mess of feelings he doesn’t know how to release. You watch him bathe in his misery, you watch him drown in it.

You keep your hand to yourself instead of offering it.

You know he’ll never take it.

Look, you can play it cool

Act like you don't care

River don't be cruel

You're pushing me away

You’re interesting.

Jamil doesn’t care about much, and he certainly doesn’t care about you.

But a magicless human barreling into his world (literally) at orientation? You’ve got his interest peaked, at least. That’s it. He doesn’t care enough to give you a second glance. The only thing he knows about you is that you’re from a different world. But rumors always spread like wildfire, and suddenly, you’re the talk of the school. Riddle overblotted and you, somehow, are on center stage. In the Spelldrive tournament, he doesn’t know too much about what transpired, but what he does know is that you’re involved again somehow.

You could be useful.

You could be an asset to him, a boon if used correctly.

1, 2, 3, pieces fall into place.

Kalim is powerful, even if he doesn’t know it. But you, you’re Crowley’s little helper, aren’t you? You can make the headmaster look at the problem head on, instead of cowing to the Al Asims’ money. When everyone in Scarabia, and even Ramshackle’s prefect themself, is saying that Kalim is no longer fit to be housewarden, then wouldn’t the headmaster need to listen?

Stay.

Stay for another dinner. Another night. Another training session.

Stay until you’re useless to Jamil.

Don't want to get hurt

So you hurt me first

With the words you say

Maybe you should fall

Hah. You ruined his plans.

He lays on the floor, soaked in ink and sweat and tears, the forbidden taste of freedom lingering on his tongue. Azul and the twins are looking at him with mild amusement, even though he could clearly see they were just as injured, just as tired as he was. But he can’t read you. Even under snake whisper, he never understands what’s in your mind. You’re looking at him with an expression he can’t place, you give him a feeling he can’t shake. He’s lightheaded, he doesn’t really know where to go from here—when the adrenaline runs out and blood returns to his veins, Jamil has no idea what to do.

He hurt Kalim.

He hurt his dorm.

He hurt you.

Is that all he can do? When the chains that bind him are momentarily unlocked, is hurting other people the only thing he’s good at?

He meets your eyes.

There it is again; an emotion he doesn’t get. Are you pitying him? Is it empathy, sympathy? What do you want from him?

There is nothing that Jamil Viper can offer you.

Not when he doesn’t even belong to himself.

That's what rivers do

'Cause when you're in love

You don't mind a different view

Things are looking up

You think it’s unfair how beautiful Jamil is, even defeated and down on his knees. You ignore Grim for a moment to skirt around the black substance on the floor, making your way to Jamil. He looks at you warily, reminiscent of a wild animal that’s cautious, and rightly so, of a strange being entering its territory.

You hold your hand out.

You should know better than to hope that today is finally the day that he takes it.

But he does.

It’s more than what you imagined it to be. In your dreams, the boy that you love takes it with a flustered face and an awkward smile, hands clammy with sweat. In reality, the very first time that Jamil ever takes your hand, there’s a determined look on his face and sludge on his palms. He’s tiredly glaring at you, likely internally cursing you out for ruining his evil plans. With the way his pretty eyes are slightly squinted, brows furrowed and lips curved downwards into a frown, you think it’s so much better than your fantasies.

Because it’s the real Jamil.

And his grip kind of hurts when you help him up, but he doesn’t complain when you make him lean on your shoulder for support. You help him back to his room.

Everything’s over. For now.

But for you and your poor heart, it’s all just begun.

Maybe this is the step you’d needed to get closer to him? Maybe this is the part of the cheesy romantic movie where he lets you in after troubles and tribulations? Maybe this time, you can get to know who he really is.

Strip away the practiced incompetence. Take off his cloak made of calculated errors.

So, it’s decided.

From now on, you’ll find out everything about Jamil, and you’ll give and give and give and give, if only to replace the parts he’d had to give away over the years.

You’re both broken.

But maybe if you give him the parts of you that are still working, at least one of you can be fixed.

Oh river (river, river) don't run (run, run)

Don't run (river, river)

Don't run (run, run)

Oh river (river, river) don't run (run, run)

Don't run (river, river) from our love (run, run)

He wakes up in the infirmary. It’s still you.

Why are you still here?

Leave. Leave him alone. He doesn’t deserve your gentle care, not when it’s his fault, not when he’s the reason both for your and his own injuries. You never say a word, but you redress his wounds so carefully, making sure not to hurt him in the process.

What do you get out of this?

He genuinely doesn’t understand.

Jamil has never been kind to you, no, he’s always done what he needed to do in order to get you to move according to the script he’d written. He’d toyed with you, manipulated you, don’t you understand? He lied, because lying is his nature, because you’re just so gullible, you never even thought twice before believing any of his words.

Why don’t you get it?

You hand him a packet of cookies. Cheap ones from the school store, but judging by the way you’re dressed, and what little knowledge he has of your financial situation, he knows it’s all you have on you. He takes it with a soft ‘thanks’ and opens it. It tastes like cardboard, he can make better ones.

But you smile at him.

Your smile reminds him of the sun back home. It’s unbearably bright, he wants to turn his eyes away, but it’s also so unbearably stunning. And your voice, it’s akin to the nectar of blooming flowers in the spring when they travel through the air in all their sweetness. “Eat up, you need to regain your strength.”

If you refuse to be his enemy…then what is he supposed to do?

Look, darling don't give up

When the water's rough

Where you gonna go?

My heart is your home

You are persistent, if nothing else. In a corner somewhere, in a low whisper that no one other than you or him would have heard, he’d apologized. You accepted his apology. He thought that would have been the end of it. You’d return to the state of strangers, as you had been before the winter vacation. But you’re like honey, sticking to his fingers and leaving a saccharine residue he just can’t wash off. You’re in the cafeteria and you choose to sit next to him, in the hallways where you greet him a cheery ‘good morning’ and ‘good afternoon’, in the parties in Scarabia that Kalim invites you to.

You pull Jamil away to a hidden balcony to escape the noise. You laugh and chatter away even when he doesn’t reply.

You hold his hand.

He lets you.

He doesn’t know why, but he lets you do whatever you want. He never stops you, even though he knows he should.

You show up to basketball practice and every single game. He tries, he really does, to convince himself that you’re there for Ace. You guys are best friends, right? So of course you’d be there to support him. Hell, you could even be there for Floyd, with how close you seem to be with the merman.

(Jamil is a liar, after all.)

He tells himself you’re not there for him.

Even when you run up to him after a successful play, passing him a cold bottle of water and a fluffy towel for his sweat, he swears you’re not there to support him. Why would you? He’s the guy that threw you all the way to the other side of his dormitory.

(You only give Ace an eye roll when he brags about the win, and Floyd, a high five.)

(The best liars fool themselves.)

Nothing is as cold

As running on your own

So river don't you rush

Maybe you should fall

You have…what was the expression again?

Jamil watches on with Kalim from the corner of the court.

Two left feet, that’s it. Your dancing is, quite frankly, hilarious to watch. A mess of uncoordinated limbs flailing about, but it’s certainly better than Grim’s or Deuce’s. Kalim interrupts with a well-meaning comment (rude, but it’s true), and somehow, Jamil’s volunteered against his will to teach the clumsy first-years how to dance.

Ace knows enough of the basics, Deuce is remarkably stiff, Grim is a hopeless case.

But you can learn.

You want to pass the auditions too? Vil’s rather stringent with his requirements, though Rook is certainly not. But if you want to have even a shot at this, maybe Jamil can teach you more thoroughly, one on one.

Sevens, even he doesn’t know what he’s saying anymore.

You agree.

(Why did you agree?)

That's what rivers do

'Cause when you're in love

You don't mind a different view

Things are looking up

One hand on your waist, the other gently fixing your leg in place by your upper thigh.

(He wonders if you can hear his heart beating when his chest is to your back.)

“You should be more relaxed. The song isn’t aggressive, so you shouldn’t be so stiff.” Jamil speaks lowly into your ear, and he feels you shudder but never pull away. Instead, you nod and try to follow his instructions the best you can. Your body melts into the posture he’s veering you towards, molded by his palms. You’re warm, and the way you’re nervously looking back over your shoulder to gauge his reaction makes him think of the stray cats that occasionally circled him for food.

“Sorry, I just, don’t really dance,” you admit in embarrassment.

“Then why do you want to audition for the SDC?”

“Hm? Because my friends are auditioning. They think that if enough of us are in the team, they’ll be able to replace Epel. He doesn’t seem very willing to compete, after all.”

And there you are again.

Saving another stranger, as if kindness itself is melded into your bones. Jamil finds that he was wrong; it’s not just your smile that’s evocative of sunlight, it’s you. Your eyes meet his with a warmth that doesn’t burn, yet touching your skin makes him feel like he’d just come in contact with red-hot lava.

If you’re this kind to everyone, was he just another charity case to you?

Oh river (river, river) don't run (run, run)

Don't run (river, river)

Don't run (run, run)

Oh river (river, river) don't run (run, run)

Jamil pushes you away like it’s routine.

Everytime you think you’ve managed to dig deeper, you’re met with another blockade, each stronger than the last. He’s confusing, because everytime you think he’s letting you get closer (every time, you’re given hope that your feelings have come through), you’re disappointed again and again and again. You manage to graze the edge of his fingers before he flinches away like your touch burns him like hot metal.

And you keep trying.

What else are you supposed to do?

You continue your efforts and hope and pray that one day, he’ll see you.

But for now, you watch out for his lines and redraw them without his knowledge. You do what you can to be his friend, because even though every bone in your body is begging for his love, you know it’s impossible when he won’t even let you be his confidant. You sit next to him and stay, even when he tries to scoot further away from you. Is it healthy? Probably not. You know better than to do what you’re doing. But you don’t stop.

(Jamil is like a drug injected straight into your veins.)

Don't run (river, river) from our love (run, run)

Don't run from me river

Don't run from me river, river

No don't run from me river

He thought that distancing himself from you would be the right thing to do. He doesn’t know if it’s right, but what he does know is that it’s impossible. You’re a thought always running through his mind; a dream flowing through his reality.

When did it start that, even when he knows you’re not near, he still searches for you?

Jamil almost feels relief when he arrives at Pomefiore and realizes that you didn’t make the cut. Almost. He’s not relieved though, it’s overshadowed by a feeling of restlessness he doesn’t understand.

Anything concerning you, Jamil’s never quite understood.

Then you arrive anyway. When he’s managed to calm his heart down, you rev it up again like an engine. Vil announces you to be the team manager, and you agree quickly to let the team stay at Ramshackle at the notion of the prize money.

(You certainly weren’t looking at Jamil when you agreed.)

How is he supposed to avoid you now?

He moves in with the rest of the group, when you insist that you’re one bedroom short and thus, regretfully, Jamil would have to stay with you for the duration of his stay. He’s a liar, of course he knows you’re lying. He can see your gleeful smile you’re desperately trying to hide, in the small giggles that leave your lips when you think no one’s paying attention to you. He can decline, of course, and just room with Kalim instead where he can make sure that the heir survives the night without too much distance.

Instead, he agrees, only asking for Kalim to room nearby.

Don't run from me river, river

No don't run from me river

Don't run from me river, river

No don't run from me river

Your very smart and well thought-out plan worked.

Hm, maybe a little too well.

Jamil didn’t say anything when you basically forced him into sharing a room with you. Now he’s in the bathroom, and you’re shaking in your pajamas (from fear? Excitement? Withdrawal symptoms?), tucked into your cheap cotton sheets you’d bought at Sam’s for a couple thaumarks. It is unfortunate, but true, when you say that these are the nicest sheets you have. Jamil exits the bathroom fully clothed (sadly), hair wrapped in a towel and a hair dryer in hand. “Let me help you.” There is no way you were letting an opportunity like this slip through your fingers.

Surprisingly, he complies.

He’s sitting on your bed while you’re kneeling on the mattress behind him, plugging the device on and getting to work. God, it’s divine, he’s divine—his hair smells fruity and floral, and it moves through your fingers like he’s in a shampoo commercial.

(Don’t be a freak. Don’t sniff his hair.)

It takes a long time for it to dry, but when it does, it’s smooth and shiny and absolutely gorgeous. He tries to get up and says he can put his hair oil on by himself, and you take out the pushiest, most blunt sides of you in order to convince him to let you do it too.

Safe to say, sleep escapes you when you’re next to a five-foot-seven beauty in an oversized hoodie and pajama pants.

Maybe you should fall

That's what rivers do

'Cause when you're in love

You don't mind a different view

Jamil has come to the conclusion that he can’t avoid you.

Perhaps it was a realization that should have come long ago. But as the days pass by and he’s in your dormitory, it only further cements in him the feelings he’d been running from. Seeing you everyday feels right, spending every waking moment with you is more than just comfortable. It’s freeing in a way, like he’d just arrived to the countryside from the smoke of the city and he’s taking his first whiff of fresh air.

Practice is enjoyable.

He dances and he sings, and he can feel your eyes on him, roaming up and down but never to anyone else. For the first time in his life, someone’s chosen him, someone’s looking at him with every bit of their attention and focus. Not Kalim, not anyone else. Him. Jamil might be addicted to the feeling of you so openly lusting after him, almost begging for his attention.

(He can’t recognize the other emotions, but physical attraction is easy to read.)

You desire him. Really?

When he looks back at you, catching you in the middle of your act, he enjoys seeing your flustered face and avoidant gaze all the more. Vil calls for a break, so he stretches before taking the sports drink you’re offering.

(It reminds him of when you’d visit him during his basketball games.)

Jamil lightens the mood by deciding to make small talk with you instead of calling you out on your behavior. He takes a sip and laughs with you when Ace and Grim get in a scuffle in the middle of the dance floor, Vil breaking them up with a well-thrown bottle of apple juice. He watches you laugh at Ace clutching a forming bump on his forehead. It sounds like something he can’t quite place, but what he does know is that he’s dreamt of it before—

He’s…dreamt of you.

Multiple times.

The realization hits him harder than the bottle that Vil had thrown at Ace.

Things are looking up

Oh river (river, river) don't run (run, run)

Don't run (river, river)

Don't run (run, run)

Oh river (river, river) don't run (run, run)

Don't run (river, river) from our love (run, run)

Practice was useless.

You watch the reaction of the crowd in response to Neige and his team’s rehearsal. It was a fine performance (if it had been done in a kindergarten recital). Yet you see Vil seething and Rook sighing like the both of them had already seen defeat before it even arrived. You feel annoyance, frustration, injustice (why should the cutesy dance win when it was poorly put together, nothing but a mockup of an actually talented number?). None of that helps.

Vil overblots.

It’s familiar, though it probably shouldn’t be. The fight saps all the energy you had in your body, and you rush to your friends before the dust even settles, thankfully, no one has a serious injury. They still perform despite everything that had just happened, on the stage that your friend Tsunotarou had rebuilt with just a flick of his wrist. Predictably, they lose.

Well, who said the majority of people had good taste?

(You find Jamil packing in your room right afterwards. You convince him to stay, just a little longer. You wonder what you would need to do to convince him to stay forever.)

Oh river (river, river) (don't run from me river)

Don't run (run, run) (don't run from me river, river)

Don't run (river, river) (no don't run from me river)

Don't run (run, run) (don't run from me river, river)

Jamil thinks he finally understands.

Not you, exactly, rather, the combination of emotions he always finds whenever he looks into your eyes. It was love, a deep adoration that seeped into your soul and made you vulnerable to everything he did. It makes him rethink; was it his unique magic all that time ago, or was it just you fully willing to submit to his whims? No, when did this even start? You’ll likely never give him an answer to that question, but he’s smart enough to figure it out on his own. Retrace the steps, right? All the way back to the first time he met you.

(It’s not quite love yet. But something is there, and he doesn’t know why.)

It’s incorrect for him to assume that just because he found out what your feelings for him were, he’d automatically unravel who you are as a person. It only serves to deepen the enigma; what had he done for you to notice him so early on?

(He crosses out the possibility it might be love at first sight. How boring.)

You must be some tactical genius, and every action leading to this moment must’ve all been a trap. It was as if every step he’d taken since the day you met had only led him spiraling down, deeper and deeper into you. You’re a master at this game he’d noticed too late, you’d already gotten him stuck in your well-woven web of deceit.

How unexpected.

And yet, thrilling.

As Jamil lays his head on your lap, drifting off to a peaceful sleep under the shade of the apple tree, he takes in the feeling of you gently massaging his scalp and thinks of only one thing.

He’d lost to your machinations.

(If you want it so badly, Jamil will give you whatever is left of him that is his. He will trust you.)

Oh river (river, river) (don't run from me river)

Don't run (run, run) (don't run from me river, river)

Don't run (river, river) (no don't run from me river)

From our love (run, run) (don't run from me river, river)

His eyelashes are remarkably long. You gently trail a fingertip over the edge of its fanned-out shape, taking note of the shadow it leaves on his cheekbones.

He doesn’t wake up when you kiss his cheek.

Jamil is a mystery you want to keep trying to read every single moment of everyday. He’s a person you want to keep next to you, even if you’ve already gotten to the bottom of all his plans and ideals. You were attracted to him because Jamil is a shattered mirror, all its pieces still reflecting you.

He was barely existing too.

You saw in him what you know is present within yourself; a creature of self-doubt and hatred, wanting to know its place in this world, needing to know its purpose for existence. But unlike you, Jamil took steps to find a way out of his own personal hell, while back in your own world, you were only ever stuck in the same place. He’s everything you never thought you needed, but did.

Now, he’s breathing.

You wonder if he feels safe with you.

You wonder if he feels the same way that you do. Does he look at you and feel alive? Just like how Jamil was the beginning of your living, are you his?

You don’t need to know the answer.

(You couldn’t fix him, and he couldn’t fix you. Isn’t it great, then, that your broken pieces slot right into each other?)

#disney twisted wonderland #disney twst #twisted wonderland #gender neutral reader #x reader #twst x reader #jamil viper x reader #jamil x reader #jamil viper

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nrdmssgs · 1 year

Note

Hello id like to humbly request a scenario with König where y/n previously went MIA, and is assumed dead. König is sent on a hostage rescue mission and when he gets there finds out not only is she alive, but she’s one of the hostages he’s there to rescue 🩷 i ADORE your writing!

Masterlist

Angst, hurt/comfort

Pairing: König x afab reader

TW: Mention of alcohol, several mentions of grief and depression, mentions of injuries, mention of human trafficking, swearing.

Authors note: I've tried to keep all the disturbing stuff very mild, but I can't help but see, as the readers` alleged death would absolutely crush König. Sorry for taking so long. I love this request so much, I can't stop thanking you, dear anon. Love you! This is actually kinda songfic, so if anybody needs music for this one: here you are.

Scarlet shell

“König, listen to me! Please! There is no body! There is nothing, we could possibly miss here!” His squad mate is trying to catch up with König, but it's impossible: he moves forward, maneuvering, between cargo transports at incredible speed.

How many times did he search for you past days? More precisely, how many dozens of times?

He searched every centimeter of the perimeter where you worked, checked literally everywhere.

He did not take breaks for food or sleep. His team gradually lost strength, but he did not give up: he continued to circle around the place where the explosion thundered on that fateful night.

Koenig could not bring himself to stop and admit the obvious: if you were at the epicenter at the time of the explosion, only a damp shadow on the ground and a couple of scraps of clothing could remain from your body.

You don't need to talk if you don't feel like it, my love. Please never feel sorry for staying silent around me. Never beat up yourself. We all are born different, we walk different paths: your journey has made you waste most of the words we could have shared very early. It sometimes happens so, I know. The truth is that you don't have to put into words what you feel when you are next to me: I see it all in your eyes. You have reached such perfection in these silent speeches that I am ready to sit and listen to you endlessly. Even if "listening" means just looking into your eyes.

At first, he can't make himself come into your room. He comes to the door, holds out his hand and, after standing there for a while, turns around.

He needs to collect your belongings, make room for a new resident. But König can't gather enough strength.

When he finally forces himself into your room, a deafening silence engulfs him: your voice no longer here, your laughter, even your breathing is no longer heard.

König starts to collect your things, putting them carefully in a cardboard box: clothes, equipment, books, small utensils. All this absorbed your smell, your warmth. Every single item seems to burn his fingers.

He doesn't know how long it takes before he gives up: it hurts so much, he feels the pain on a physical level.

Your shirt falls on the edge of the box. He brushes his fingers against your blanket and pillow. König kneels, then curls up right on the floor, ignoring the dust.

“Meine… meine…*” He can't even say your name - it gets stuck right in his throat, choking him. He never had enough words, when you were around, and he hates himself for that. But now, he loses even your name.

Sometimes I just think about words. Yesterday I looked at you and thought of the beautiful word you taught me: “die Hingabe” or "devotion". What is it in essence? Persistence and immutability in ones feelings, right? I was bored, so I googled this word. The search engine told me that it has approximately 195 million pages in its database that mention this word. Things were better with the word "honor" - almost 2 billion pages. With "love" - 11 billion pages. So love is 56 times more popular than devotion... Although it is clear that only a deeply devoted person can truly love, right?

Sometimes he hates it: his devotion to you does not weaken with time. A few years pass, and he learns to live in constant pain. Learns to wake up every morning, knowing well, he won't see your face. Grows accustomed to all-consuming silence and cold around him.

But what drives him to the limit is a constant urge to finish yet another mission, just to come back to the base, bury his face in your shirt and disappear completely in a slumber without thoughts.

Nothing helps: alcohol tastes like water, training doesn't leave him breathless and too weak to even think of you, no matter how hard he tries.

At some point, he even finds himself talking to another woman. She even takes his number, and sometimes they exchange warm and kind messages. He answers her automatically.

Returning from their third meeting (he cant even call it a date), he realizes with horror that he does not remember her face.

There are no faces left in his life, except for one - that which he can neither see nor touch anymore. Your face.

My love, I see the scars, your traumas left on your body and in your mind. I know, it hurts. Every time, I ask you about them - I mean no further harm. You don't have to tell unless you are not ready. But I want you to see, that all those things didn't break you: you have not become the monster, you are scared of. There is still so much love, so much light in your hands. I want you to know, that the only reason, I'm asking you about your past traumas is that I want to fight them for you, to help you to heal. I'll fight for that love and light, you bear. Not to get them from you, never. But only for you to feel it all inside your heart.

König doesn't notice anything different. He just needed a new veil and didn't have any old black tshirts on hands.

So first he puts on a dark scarlet veil. It is still convenient. Then his old gloves are torn and he orders new ones... To match the color of the top.

It's just some gear, it doesn't affect anything. But rumors are spreading around the base.

"He's off the chain."

"Did you see what he did to the hostiles on the last mission?"

"That animal is unleashed."

"We no longer have König - there is only the bloody beast under that veil"

"I'm terrified by those red clothes whenever they flash somewhere on the battlefield. Fucking omen."

König ignores the whispers. He doesn't care. Is he more productive now? Well, maybe it's for better.

I keep writing you these silly letters, but I will never send them. I don't want to embarrass you with my chatter. I'll stack them in my drawer: letter after letter, confession after confession. I told you the most important words a long time ago, but all this ... I don't want to think about the circumstances under which you could find these letters and read them. But if something does happen, remember: I am yours, from head to toe, completely yours. Even if I'm not next to you now - my body, my mind and my heart - yours. Love you.

His commanders tend not to send him on missions where he would have to interact with civilians. His approach to combat really becomes so brutal that bystanders and hostages run the risk of getting too severe moral trauma.

But when it comes to cleaning up an entire village, where people from all over the world are brought for human trafficking, they simply have no choice. They need the best of the best soldiers, and König tops the list.

And he justifies the title of the best: he sweeps through the village like a tornado, cleaning one room after another.

König is somehow merciful enough to rip the padlocks off the doors where the hostages were being held, make sure there are only civilians in the room, and move on to the next door and the next building.

He unleashes a wave of fury on his enemies, alternating quick kills with slow and painful ones. None of his team dares to speak to him.

When they report to him that the last building is cleared, and they can move back, he turns around with a predatory look.

The building where he stopped is immersed in silence. One of his people says something, but König only raises his finger to his lips and gestures that he is going to check the second floor.

He doesn't hear anything suspicious, doesn't see anything... But some inhuman instinct tells him that he's not alone here.

König tries to step quietly, but the old withered boards crackle treacherously under his feet.

He walks up to the back room on the second floor and pushes the door open. He remembers very well how he himself knocked out the lock some 15 minutes ago, but there was no one in the room ...

This time he comes in and takes a closer look. His eyes linger on the pile of dusty rags, carpets and gutted cushions on the floor.

It appears suspicious. He slowly approaches, pulls out a knife, and throws back several pillows at once.

What he sees makes him freeze in horror. Your face... He saw your face - emaciated, covered with cuts and bruises of all colors. You covered your mouth in horror with your hand, the faded skin tight around every bone, every joint. It seemed that even your eyes had lost almost all color: two dark gray abysses stared back at Koenig in fear of death.

You looked more like your own ghost, but that didn't matter. He very carefully lowered the knife to the ground.

"It's me." König unbuttoned his helmet and removed it and his veil. "It's me..."

You didn't answer. Only large tears glistened in the corners of your eyes.

“Meine Liebe*, it`s me.” He kept whispering, hoping to calm you down, while removing layer after layer of rags and pillows, covering your body.

He throws away tactical gloves and carefully inspects you to understand, if youre injured. His body trembles, his voice fails him and König proceeds to the only way, he can convince you, that you are safe at last: he takes you in his hands, carefully cradles your fragile body and presses kisses against tear stains on your cheeks.

When his team finds him slowly rocking you in his hands, they step back, giving you two some privacy.

But they notice the bloody-red veil and gloves, laying on the floor as a cracked, broken and finally not needed shell.

*Meine - my *Meine Liebe - my love

779 notes · View notes

thatanimewriter · 9 months

Text

CRY FOR LOVE.

➳ synopsis: ever since dan feng had been sentenced to molting rebirth, you didn't know how to move on, despite not having your love returned by the high elder. encountering his reincarnation - dan heng - centuries down the track wasn't the plan.

➳ character/s: dan heng, dan feng

➳ warnings: swearing, death (but a double whammy), reincarnation, unrequited love (unless-), spoilers for the 1.2 trailblaze mission, haha songfic/scripted music video??? (screenshot summary of a movie but written)

➳ notes: here is the explanation of such fic type and the guide on how i suggest to read this :)). i have an addiction to this song istg, baekhyun vocals send me

𝐫𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐮𝐥𝐞𝐬 / 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐜𝐭𝐞𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 / 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐬 / 𝐰𝐢𝐩 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫�� 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐥𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭, 𝐈'𝐦 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐤𝐞𝐩𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐰𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠.

the image of dan feng in chains as he was led to the shackling prison was burnt into your mind, even when you closed your eyes.

𝐈 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐨𝐮𝐬𝐥𝐲, 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐟𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐩𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐝𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐳𝐲.

you held the little block puzzle in your hand containing the confession letter you planned to give him, but sighed and pocketed it. you won't be needing it.

𝐖𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐟𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞, 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐥𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐟𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐢𝐜𝐡 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐬𝐢𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐟 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐨𝐨.

"i'm not him."

you held his gaze and sucked in a small breath, smiling bittersweetly. "i know," you whispered. "what's your name?"

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐦𝐞𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐠𝐨 𝐭𝐨 𝐚 𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐬𝐩𝐨𝐭, 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠?

dan heng didn't know how to feel about jing yuan bringing him to the old spots they used to go to, but he realised he didn't feel anything at all.

𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐬𝐨 𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐡 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐞, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐞. 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐈 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐛𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐥𝐲, 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐞.

dan heng doesn't miss the forced smile you put on just for him. "i'm sorry-"

"you're not him," you interrupted, taking a shaky breath. maybe a short walk together wasn't a good idea. "it's ok. don't apologise for something you didn't do."

𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐈 𝐜𝐫𝐲, 𝐦𝐲 𝐭𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐝𝐫𝐲. 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐚𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐧𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐛𝐲 𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐟 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲𝐢𝐧𝐠, 𝐈 𝐝𝐢𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥. 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐭𝐨𝐨 𝐝𝐞𝐞𝐩 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐖𝐚𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲?

a single tear rolls down your face as you curl your knees to your chest, resting your chin atop them as you gazed at the pond. it felt pathetic to see dan heng sitting beside you in the reflection of the water, a gentle hand rubbing your back despite knowing you a total of 2 weeks.

𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐝, 𝐈 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐞, 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤, 𝐈 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐞.

his lips press into a thin line as the tears welled in your eyes. he thinks it's awkward how he rubs your back but the guilt of what his past self has done to you overrides his senses and pushes him to continue the motion.

𝐔𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧, 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐬 𝐦𝐞 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐜𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐧𝐞𝐰𝐥𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐬.

this is getting ridiculous, you thought. the burning question of 'what if?' has been plaguing your mind since you met dan heng a month ago.

𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐰 𝐈 𝐦𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞. 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐧 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭, 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐬𝐨 𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐟𝐢𝐜𝐮𝐥𝐭?

for a month, dan heng has been trying to remember any importance you had to dan feng's life, but he can't ignore the ache in his chest when he thinks about you being in it.

𝐈 𝐰𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐚𝐜𝐤 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞, 𝐢𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐧𝐨 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞. 𝐈 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐬 𝐰𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐈 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝𝐧'𝐭 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭. 𝐈 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐡𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐬𝐚𝐲, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞.

how much longer was he going to be here? you weren't sure if you wanted to know the answer to your own question as you took an unfamiliar route on your walk. you were sure he noticed you purposely avoiding him, but you didn't know how else to rid yourself of feelings for his past self.

the absence of you was deafening. dan heng's hope that maybe there are some good things about his past life was diminishing as he watched you take another detour. he wants to follow you, to hug you, to apologise to you, but his feet remain rooted to the ground.

the bags under your eyes seem darker as you watched him eat with the astral express, but a teary smile sat on your tired features at the thought of you having that with someone in a past life of your own. just not this one.

𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐟𝐮𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐥𝐚𝐜𝐞, 𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞, '𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐰𝐞'𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐮𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞. 𝐈 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐞.

he is everywhere. you see his eyes in the lakes, ocean and the sky. you feel the warmth of his company as you wander down aurum alley. you're reminded of his intelligence as you pass through stargazer navalia. you're reminded of your unrequited love every time you come to central starskiff haven, surrounded by those flaunting their success in love whereas you failed.

you swallow your frustrations, gazing at a starskiff that faded into the horizon. perhaps he would be better without your heartbroken presence...

your bags were packed and ready to go, your home now eerily empty, save for a singular photo frame of yourself and dan heng that was taken by march. you left your key inside a pot as always before you turned your back on your past, never to look back again.

with shaky hands, dan heng holds the photo frame containing a fond memory of you that always seemed to weigh on his mind. he looked around your home, hoping you would show, but knowing you wouldn't come back for him.

𝐈𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐈 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞.

a shallow breath escaped your lips as you lay in the snow, blood pouring from your chest.

"i'm finally free..."

𝐈𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞, 𝐈 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐬𝐨 𝐢𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞.

a tear fell from dan heng's crystal-like eyes as he knelt by your grave, giving the headstone a kiss he wished he had the chance to give you.

#honkai star rail #hsr #dan heng #honkai star rail x reader #hsr x reader #dan heng x reader #honkai star rail imagines #hsr imagines #dan heng imagines #dan feng #dan feng x reader #dan feng imagines #haha he loves you in the next life #but you die after unrequited love from his past life

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ambrozjas · 7 months

Note

Could you do a songfic with the song 'Mary' by Alex G with Dallas?

I love your writing sm it genuinely makes me happy <3 take your time with this request and have a lovely day !!

mary is the girl that leaves you to rot ꨄ︎

✧˖*°࿐ notes 🧸ᰔᩚ

i cried makjng this n im so proud of it n i love alex g sm

✧˖*°࿐ warnings ᰔᩚ

major character death, grieving reader, weird descriptions of adrenaline because i’m obsessed with it, song lyrics r in italics !! 💕

✧˖*°࿐ word count ᰔᩚ

2276 words, 12170 characters

. ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄ . ˚◞♡ ⃗ *ೃ༄

mary is the girl that i wanna kiss

she’s got big red eyes and big red lips

she’s got big sharp teeth and big fat hips

dallas winston was known as a lot of things. he was a hood, a filthy greaser, a pervert, an idiot. and while you had heard all of these things about him, you had never actually spoken a word to him besides a gruff, “watch where you’re going” when you bumped into him.

you took notice of the hollowness in his dark eyes, the way his hair was always tussled, the way a new purple bruise was always blooming on his cheek, the milky skin that shone through the small slit of his shirt lifting when he stretched, the fullness of his pink lips whenever a cigarette was sticking out between them, how soft they looked..

no, you told yourself. dallas winston was a no good hoodlum who couldn’t keep his hands to himself. that’s all he was, and that’s all he’ll ever be. but how wrong you’d come to be in the future.

mary is the girl that i wanna fuck

she’s got leather heart and leather gloves

over the next few weeks, your mind couldn’t help but wander about dallas. you practically analyzed every part of his being. the way his eyebrows furrowed when he struggled to light the cancer stick meticulously placed between his index and middle finger, his leather jacket creasing at the forearms in the process.

but of course, your thoughts had to be interrupted. whether that was for the better or worse, you couldn’t decide.

“hey! what’cha lookin’ at?” your friend slides up next to you on the bench, slipping out of the sun’s reach and under the tiny umbrella shielding you two as she followed your gaze. you both were at a small diner, eating outside despite the tulsa heat causing your thighs to sweat when you sat down. you didn’t mind the heat, maybe that’s why you started playing with fire by talking to dallas winston.

you muttered a quick, “nothin’” when you saw your friend roll her eyes and groan at the fact that you were watching him, dallas. you snatched the juice box that she held out to you while she continued to watch dallas with two younger kids chase a group of small kids around, shouting about in an attempt to scare them.

“i still don’t get it. yeah, he’s a bit cute but i don’t understand why you’d go for a guy like that—“

“i’m not going for anybody. ‘s it a crime to observe the locals?”

“bit creepy but,” she paused as she tsked, “not a crime.” she sighed, sipping on her own juice box once more.

she’s the only girl that i wanna love

when you had finally mustered up the courage to talk to ‘the big bad wolf’ himself, you got through the brief scoffing-at-your-attempts-at-conversation stage and actually realized that dallas isn’t all that bad. maybe he’s wore you down, maybe it’s just habit at this point, but he’s actually tolerable when he’s not around all these dumb broads who are looking for a quick bang.

it took a while. like, a long while. but dallas didn’t mind you anymore. you were no longer the pest that buzzed around his ears in hopes that you weren’t swatted away. dallas claimed he didn’t have friends, need friends. but you’re one of the closest people that would ever get a chance to see dallas the way he truly is. you had met the curtis brothers, already recognizing sodapop from school before he dropped out. you had met two-bit, an obnoxiously flirty drunk who threw teasing remarks at you and dally at night long. you had met steve, although all he did was sneer at you when you got close to him, similar to a dog with a piece of beef in its mouth.

when dallas had finally asked you out, it was curt. grumbling a small offer in an attempt to sound tougher so he would mask his awkwardness if you said no. but if you’re being honest, you couldn’t imagine being with any other boy besides dallas winston. he plagued your mind, planted like weeds that you couldn’t get rid of. whether that were his intentions all along were unknown, although you wouldn’t put it past him. dallas was an interesting guy, for sure.

listen to me baby, i don’t mind

i wanna be with you and waste my time

“y’know, you don’t have to be here right?” you asked him, watching as he blowed another cloud of smoke through the small gap his mouth provided on the other side of his cigarette occupied lips.

he merely glanced at you, his arm behind his head as he lounged about on your bed, weight crinkling the sheets.

“because if—“

“can you relax? i wanna be here, otherwise i’d get up and leave right now.” he plucked the cigarette from his mouth as he fully turned his head to look at you.

you shrugged, “i wonder what’d make me ask when you’ve said ‘i’m wasting my time’ and ‘how long are you stretching this out’ and—“

“alright, alright. i get it.”

you sat in silence for a bit, feeling a bit awkward at the fact that you pulled his card and had said nothing more. you were convinced dallas would leave once he had sat up, dusting some ash off of his dark shirt.

“how long ‘til you finish that thing?” he pointed to the paper on your desk below you, leaning his elbows against his thighs as he got comfortable in the new position.

“why? you need t’much attention?” you cooed at him teasingly, still keeping your eyes glued to the paper.

“feels like you’ve been workin’ on it forever. i don’t wanna spend my time in silence while my girlfriend is just working on her homework.”

girlfriend, you repeated in your head. he’s been getting pretty ballsy with this label thing, huh? you smiled to yourself, writing one last sentence before putting your pencil down and getting up from your desk. dallas’ eyes trailed your figure as you stood between his legs, his hands instinctively resting on your hips.

you would almost call it domestic, the way his brown eyes gazed at you. the brown eyes that were so full of disdain and resentment for the world, somehow had room for adoration whenever he looked at you. you always admired that about him.

you placed your hand on his face, before giving him his wishes and unceremoniously plopping on top of him. you couldn’t deny him, dallas winston always got what he wanted.

give it to me baby, i feel good

i wanna feel whatever you think i should

sing it for me, baby, play my song

i wanna hear your daddy sing along

“i dunno.” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

“what do you mean you don’t know?” you put your hand on your hip and looked down at dally, a cancer stick shoved between his lips as usual.

“i don’t dance, ‘specially not with losers like you.”

“hey!”

it was the perfect moment, you were at a family party with dally. you two decided to go to a small clearing behind the house, the smell of trees wafting in the air. it was distant enough that nobody would see you but it was close enough that you could still hear the music faintly blasting through the speakers.

“c’mon dal, nobody can see us. just you ‘n me.” you held out your hand, tilting your head as you offered for a final time.

he stared at it for a second, eyes flickering between your face and your hand as he cocked an eyebrow similarly to two-bit’s habit.

you scoffed and rolled your eyes. “fine, guess i’ll just go find another guy to dance with. i’m sure andy would love—“

and then came dally’s hands on your hips pulling you back towards him when you tried to saunter away back to the front of the house. you yelped as he tugged you towards him, getting up from the small white garden chair.

you laughed and threw your head back as dallas tried to twirl you, he was almost comically stiff as he did a small two-step shuffle with you in his arms.

“wow, so romantic.”

“shut up.”

you leaned forward and rested your chin on his shoulder, relaxing in his embrace as the music changed to a much slower song. you assumed the adults were slow-dancing with each other, too. you found it funny how when you were little, you would gag at anybody else doing these actions and now, you just realize how in love they were with each other.

you mumbled the lyrics a bit as you swayed in dally’s arms, resting your eyes as his hands came to sit on your waist.

dallas relaxed a bit, too. he listened to your sweet voice as you lowly whispered the lyrics from off the top of your head, mumbling incoherent phrases at lyrics you didn’t know.

if you had told anybody else about this, about how you had practically domesticated dallas winston, about how he was no longer the big bad wolf of tulsa but instead of a common dog who rested his head in your lap, they’d never believe you. they could never believe that he could be anything else besides a greaser, that’s all that mattered in this town. you cherished these moments, oblivious to the futures ahead of you and dallas.

mary is the one who leaves you to rot

she says, ‘i am real and you are not’

that phone call from dallas still haunts you. his voice was breathy, you heard him groan at the slightest shift of movement, he sounded like he was on the verge of tears.

“what did you do, dal?” you remember the way you clutched the landline, your palms had already been sweaty. one second you were hunched over a desk stressing about math homework, and the next you were pressed up against the wall as you frantically tried to get dally’s location.

you remember the way he had whispered your name over the phone. his voice cracked as he repeated it. for a while, it was ‘doll’ this and ‘baby’ that, he rarely called you by your name anymore.

“please, just tell me where you’re at dallas.” your voice was barely a whisper at that point, you were surprised at how the phone picked it up. you pressed your forehead against the wall as you begged him not to go once he told you his goodbyes. you remember how before he slammed down the phone, he let out a small cry.

“i love you.”

and then came the familiar dial tone.

you remembered feeling a pang in your heart, it was like your vision went blurry. your throat was practically coated with barbed wire as you fought back a sob, biting your fist to avoid a cry from escaping your lips, an old habit you had learned from dallas whenever he tried to hide from you.

it was nothing like the movies, where a dramatic string quartet would play in the background as you ran in slow-motion out the door. your mind couldn’t think, your thoughts couldn’t focus. your thighs started shaking as you ran out of the door, not even bothering to put shoes on.

the cool air hit your legs, creating a pebbles effect against your skin as the goosebumps raised. your legs didn’t stop, you ran until you couldn’t anymore as you followed the noise and the array of police cars that made a bee-line down the street to the old convenience store.

you remembered the burn in your nostrils and at the back of your throat, the cool air hitting both your bare shoulders and sinuses. that didn’t stop you, though. all you could think about was dally.

you remembered how your eyes couldn’t even focus on what was in front of you. all you saw was dallas, and in his hand was a gun, in replacement of his normal cigarette.

she says, ‘i am real and you are not’

you couldn’t eat after that. who could eat so casually after watching their boyfriend be gunned down right in front of them?

it’s all a blur now, your adrenaline blocking out most of the details. all you remember was crying, as shouts came from the gang, yelling about how dally was just a kid. those screams still haunt you to this day. even now, you can’t look at a pack of kools without thinking of dallas.

you understand why he did it for johnny. johnny was the closest thing dally had to a family. if he was alive now, you’d smack the shit out of him though. you weren’t selfish, nor were you a mean person, but you couldn’t forgive dallas for doing this to you.

as you laid in bed the night of his death, you remembered how dally had made promises that were soon proven to be empty about escaping this small town, to a place with no worries. you realized now how stupid it sounded, but that didn’t matter to you because you had dally. had. and now what you had was gone, lost with the solemn memories of resting against the silk pillows and whispering small words that no other person would ever get to hear, for those words would never leave that bedroom, and those words would never leave your mind either.

you know it now, that dallas was trying to just plant himself in your mind. in his own sick way, he wanted a piece of him to be left with you. and you couldn’t deny him, dallas winston always got what he wanted.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ the outsiders did NOT have to go that hard with that “whatever dally wants dally got” quote

kiss kiss ˗ˏˋ꒰ 🍒 ꒱

#the outsiders x reader #the outsiders #fanfiction #x reader #dallas winston x reader #dallas winston #angst fic #songfic #dally imagine #the outsiders dally #dally winston #dallas winston headcanons #dallas winston blurb #dallas winston imagine #dallas winston fanfiction #the outsiders fanfiction #ambrozjas #kiss kiss

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bgomtori · 7 months

Text

☆ evening glow - c.bg

synopsis - where you and beomgyu are able to be natural around each other, and finding solace within one another.

-> idol! beomgyu x idol! reader

-> idiots to lovers, established relationship, comfort angst, songfic with lyrics(?)

-> WARNING! talks about mental exhaustion, burn outs, bad descriptions about idol life.

-> NOTES! w2e and beomgyu is just so 😓😓 and happy valentines day!! here's a vday post based on the poll i did recently

if i feel broken, you will find me.

being an idol was tough, busy schedules, having to put up an image for your fans, and not being able to have quality time with yourself. being an idol meant that you had to always put yourself out there, despite fans telling you that placing yourself first was the most important, it wasn't that easy. you couldn't be yourself, you didn't even know who your real self was at this point, you've had this bubbly, outgoing persona on ever since the start of your idol journey, the moodmaker of your group. you were constantly joking around, making the mood more lively and engaging, yet on the inside you knew that you were just someone who lost their childhood in order to pursue their dreams as an idol

that was when you met him, choi beomgyu, someone who was just like you. the moodmaker of tomorrow x together, the middle child of the group, and the one their members relied on. it was a mere coincidence, your groups had similar comeback dates, thus seeing each other backstage was normal. the occassional eye contacts and waves to each other were meaningful, dance challenges being the only times you two could fully interact with one another. it was normal to feel your heart beating against your chest rapidly, especially since you were standing beside such a pretty boy.

little did you know, beomgyu felt the same about you, he admired your vocals, and dance skills, so perfect in his eyes. he felt as if he saw an angel when he first met your eyes from across the stage at a big awards show, bowing to each other when your group was about to leave the stage. for the first time in a while, he felt his heart racing quickly, if this was still high school, he would have already ran up to you and asked for your number, but life was unfair, there were multiple cameras everywhere, they would have definitely recorded him and both of you would have landed yourselves in a scandal.

"and cut! that was a good take, good work for the day." one of the staff members announced through the speakers, you bent over, clenching your knees, panting heavily as you greeted your fans goodbye, your bandmates doing the same, walking off the stage.

"fuck why is today so much more exhausting than the previous weeks." yunjin complained, gasping for air.

"tell me about it. i feel like i fought 5 wars at once." sakura fanned herself, praying that it'll cool herself faster.

"after this, we're finally done with our comeback promotions." you exclaimed, looking forward to the well deserved break the group needed. your group bursted out in cheers, as if they were the only ones in the building, you could only giggle at their actions, clapping to yourself as you tiredly dragged yourself back to your changing room. however, the felt your legs giving up on you as you stumbled forward, you thought that you were about to fall onto the ground face first, until a pair of lean, yet muscular arms grabbed your shoulders. your eyes widened, looking up to see the man you've been eye candying since the start, choi beomgyu.

"oh, uhm sorry." you stuttered out an apology, stabilising yourself while you continuously bowed to him, your face turning red by the second. "no, it's fine, just be careful.. also your group did really well today." beomgyu reassured, complimenting your group at the same time, you thanked him with a bright smile on your face, "good luck to you guys too! i'm sure you'll do just fine. thank you again." waving to beomgyu, running back to your group who was giving you knowing looks.

you placed a finger over your lips, pushing them into the changing room, you took one last look at beomgyu, who was shushing his members, the tip of his ears turning red, before closing the door behind you.

those useless words were falling apart on me.

bumping into beomgyu in your company was more common now, hybe was big, however you two just managed to find each other no matter what. it wasn't long until you two became friends, hanging out at the cafeteria or cafe during your breaks in between practice, waving to each other excitedly, even having beomgyu drop you off at your practice room or dorm. it was quite obvious to everyone and their mothers that the both of you had something for each other.

"sneaking off to see beomgyu again?" chaewon glared at you, completely unimpressed by the way you tried sneaking out of the practice room. you laughed it off, "i'll be back quickly, you guys need a break too right?"

"fine, but be back by 3!" chaewon shouted, you gave her a thumbs up, closing the door as you started sprinting towards the lift. you had an hour before you needed to return to the practice room, that was enough time, right? after what seemed like forever, you finally reached the floor where the cafe was located at, you immediately spotted the brown haired male, his hair shorter than before, sitting infront of 2 cups of americano and a singular strawberry cake.

"sorry, practice took longer than expected." you sat beside beomgyu, startling him with the loud sound of your chair screeching against the tile floor.

"what the fuck, lift the chair up next time." beomgyu grumbled, covering his ears while glaring at you. you gave him a small apology, awkwardly sipping your americano

"this cake for me?" you smirked, nudging beomgyu's shoulder. beomgyu's face flushed, completely forgetting about the cake's existance until you noticed it, "yea.. i was planning to share it with you." beomgyu mumbled, hoping that you didn't hear the last part. you grinned, giving him a tight hug, taking the first bite of the cake.

"how's the preparation for your comeback?" you asked, nibbling on the cake that was laying on your fork. beomgyu swallowed the sweet treat before resting his chin on the palm of his hand, "it's alright, i guess?" beomgyu sounded unsure of his answer, making you slightly worried, usually he was more enthusiatic over his comebacks, excited to tell you everything about it, but this time it was different.

"are you sure? you don't sound like yourself when you answered me." you asked once again, your eyes landing on beomgyu's nervous state. the silence he was giving you made you more concerned, he has never acted this way before. "you know, you can tell me anything right?" you rubbed beomgyu's shoulder, your attempt in comforting him.

i'm struggling in my world.

beomgyu sighed, his eyes averting from your strong gaze. he bit the inside of his cheek, his mind going blank on him, he wanted to tell you, tell you everything he was feeling, including how he felt for you, but it was hard for him to do so. he didn't want to lose you, mainly because you were idols, and barely had time for one another, but still, would it be worth it? he's about to go to america the next week to work on the collab with the jonas brothers, he's been working non stop. beomgyu was tired, physically and mentally.

"you won't get mad?" beomgyu looked softly into your eyes, you nodded almost instantly, "i would never get mad at you." of course you wouldn't, he was basically the male version of you.

"i'm going to america next week, i'm working on another collab, but i'm not even done recording for the other songs in the full album yet." beomgyu admitted, stirring the remaining contents of his americano, waiting for your response, expecting you to scold him for always leaving you or something.

"you're travelling again? didn't you just come back from your tour in the US–" there it was, you were probably about to blame him for always not being able to spend time with you, "that's crazy, like are you not exhausted? did they even give you an off-day? i'll fight your management for you." oh, that was different, beomgyu had a funny feeling in his stomach, it wasn't a stomachache or anything, it felt nice. butterflies in your stomach, was it? it was nice.

"it's ok! we can always call or text when we're away from one another." you beamed, waving your phone infront of his face, his contact on your phone shoved into his face. he took this chance to read what you named him, and that was when you immediately pulled your phone away, you face flushing red. you fucked up.

"your pretty boy huh?" beomgyu teased, his ego going through the roof after realising that there was a chance that you reciprocated his feelings too. you covered your ears, blocking out any teasing beomgyu has directed to you. "shut up, shhh, i gotta go now, bye. i'm gonna be late. don't look for me." you quickly got up from your seat, making a run for it, apologising to the staff you accidentally bumped into.

beomgyu chuckled to himself, unable to ignore the burning feeling on his face, he hid his face in his hands, screaming to himself internally, a giddy smile appearing on his face as he kicked his feet around like a teenage girl in love. he has a chance, he actually has a chance with the girl he has been pinning over. what a dream come true.

"beomgyu? are you drunk or something?" a voice knocking him out of his giggly thoughts, he eyed the person down, only to see soobin hovering over him. "shut up, let's go, i'm gonna kill this next recording." beomgyu almost shouted, pushing away his chair, causing soobin to jolt from the sudden action. beomgyu returned the tray, walking towards the recording studio, soobin swore he saw beomgyu practically bouncing at each step he took.

i might be full of flaws,

you sprinted as fast as your legs took take you to the practice room, gasping for air as you dramatically fall onto the ground. your heart still pounding over the fact that beomgyu basically found out about your mini (huge) crush on him.

"you look like you just saw a ghost what–"

"BEOMGYU KNOWS THAT I LIKE HIM." you screamed, shaking the closest person to you, which was eunchae. the girls turned their heads to you so fast their heads could fly off. even the staff were stunned. "you what!?" kazuha almost jumped, she wasn't believing what she heard.

"i accidentally showed him what i named him in my contacts, and i just ran away.." you added, answering what the girls were probably thinking.

"you just ran? are you an idiot? you didn't even care to hear what he has to say to you?" you groaned at the questions being thrown at you, rolling on the ground like a child, you grumbled, "i wasn't thinking straight ok? either way, i think he's gonna pick me up from here after my practice, you guys know how it is.. we'll probably talk."

speak of the devil, your phone vibrated in your shorts, you felt yourself flinch at the feeling before pulling your phone out.

gyu : i'll see you later at 6, you can't just leave me hanging like that ;)

oh my god, you hated him, you felt like dying right there and then, the way he teased you made you blush.

"come on yn, we still have to practice, let's go." sakura pulled you up, pushing you to your starting position in the dance. you sighed, your mind was too noisy to dance right now, but maybe this would keep you distracted from your thoughts.

but you will crave my heart.

"yes perfect! that's it for today girls, you guys did amazing." the dance coach complimented, clapping for your group's efforts. you cheered, plopping onto the floor, catching your breath.

"yn, your man is outside to collect you." your dance coach joked, pointing to beomgyu who was peeking into the practice room. you flew up from your current position, immediately packing your bags.

"i'll see you guys later in the dorms, love you guys." you blew them a kiss, winking at them while they cringed at your actions, even gagging. you opened the door, almost bumping into beomgyu's chest, luckily you stopped yourself before you could even collide into him.

"let's go talk somewhere." you mumbled, dragging beomgyu to the elevators. the silence was deafening, your eyes constantly flickering from beomgyu to the ground beneath you.

"staring at me wouldn't help with anything idiot."

"i wasn't, i'm just thinking about how to not make this awkward ok." you retorted, crossing your arms against your chest, waiting for the elevator to arrive. beomgyu chuckled, "how long?"

"what do you mean?" you stared at him confused, walking out of the elevator first while beomgyu holds the door for you before following behind you.

"how long have you liked me?" beomgyu clarified, his eyes never leaving your figure. "a really long time, you know when we first saw each other at that award show, i felt a connection. then i guess from there those feelings grew." your voice was barely above a whisper, kicking the rocks you found on the pavement.

"really? i felt the same when i made eye contact with you." beomgyu's lips tugged upwards, happy that you've felt the same since the start.

"wait so you like me too?" you turned back, stopping in the middle of the pavement, seeing beomgyu give you a sheepish smile, rubbing the back of his neck. "you're kidding, are you serious?"

"of course i am, you're the first person that could understand me for me, so naturally i fell for you." beomgyu confirmed, the apples of his cheeks turning red. "i thought i was obvious with my feelings.. i swear all the little things i've been doing for you wasn't just platonic."

"fuck, i am so dense." you came to your senses, remembering all the times yunjin would almost scream at you about beomgyu being head over heels for you, but you were too stupid to think that your friendship was more than just platonic.

"then now what? are we dating or..?" you asked, you leaned your body closer to beomgyu, wanting an answer out of him while he leaned away, avoiding your eyes.

"if you want to we can.." beomgyu mumbled, his eyes looking down at you for a reaction, only to be met with the most radiant smile he has ever seen, sparkles in your eyes when you heard his answer. he could feel himself melting from the sight of you beaming in happiness, if he was this mushy already, dating you would be ten times worse.

"alright! now let's go to the convenience store and eat something, i might die from starvation." you stretched your body, intertwining your fingers with beomgyu's as you pulled him along with you. beomgyu stared at your interlocked hands and covered his face, heat rushing to his cheeks. he's finally dating you, like officially, something he has been dreaming off since you guys became closer.

i'm broken.

it's been a few months since you and beomgyu have gotten together. it has been a crazy few months, weird sasaengs catching you guys on a date, causing the media to go crazy over this newfound information which eventually led to hybe releasing a statement, announcing that everything was real. after that incident, you two have been hanging out openly, holding hands and hugging each other, a dream come true.

however, being idols meant that you guys had hectic schedules, you were preparing for your new digital single release while beomgyu was releasing a full album. his workload piling up especially since he had just ended the world tour in japan. you barely saw beomgyu, you were losing it, you missed him so much, calling him through the phone wasn't enough. you missed him so bad to the point you started scrolling through beomgyu's hashtag on both tiktok and instagram.

beomgyu, on the other hand, felt the exact same, he missed your soft kisses that tasted like peach, he missed your head pats which reminded him on his childhood, everything reminded him of you, leading him to buy many items for you. he walked out of the practice room with the rest of the boys, smiling and laughing about different topics that they were discussing, trying to keep the mood up, but once he reached his room, he immediately fell onto his bed, letting out a huge sigh. he was tired out of his mind.

gyu : i'm coming over.

yn : what, why?

gyu : just wait for me :'

beomgyu threw on his coat, quietly unlocking the door to prevent the rest from hearing him. he regretted not wearing gloves, the cold air immediately hitting his skin when he stepped out of his dorm, swiftly, he made his way to your dorm, taking every single shortcut that he knew could take him to you quicker.

beomgyu knocked once, no answer, twice, no answer, thrice– the door opened before he could even knock for the third time, revealing a stunned kazuha standing infront of him.

"oh, yn's boyfriend, what are you doing here?" she stared at him from top to bottom, inspecting his posture.

"i want to see yn, also i have a name kazuha." beomgyu rolled his eyes subtly, making sure that it wasn't obvious. kazuha gave him one last look before yelling your name through the dorm. it was so loud it shocked you, you scurried to where the voice was coming from, only to see kazuha holding the door to a shivering choi beomgyu.

"oh my god, beomgyu come in." you invited, pulling him in by his coat, kazuha closed the door, telling you a quick goodnight as she went into her room.

"how long were you out there, jeez you're freezing." you sighed, rubbing your hands together with beomgyu's hoping that it created some type of warmth for him.

so take me to the evening glow.

"can we go to your room instead of standing here..?" beomgyu whispered, placing his hands on your lowerback as he pushed you towards the direction of your room. you led him to your room, locking the door behind you while beomgyu removed his thick coat, revealing the thin sweater he was wearing. you yelped quietly when beomgyu dragged you down onto the bed with him, his arms instantly snaking around your waist, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck, his shampoo engulfing your sense of smell, bringing you comfort to a certain extent.

"is something wrong?" you whispered into his now long, brown hair. beomgyu was quick to shake his head, "missed you." you smiled at his response, knowing that this wasn't the only reason why he was overly clingly to you. beomgyu didn't like to voice out his concerns often, bottling them in as if they didn't mattered. you understood how he felt, since you do the exact same, thus giving him the affection he needed was the most that you could do to comfort him from his spiraling thoughts.

you rubbed the back of his head, playing with the ends of his wolfcut, placing kisses on the top of his head occassionally. beomgyu hummed contently, burying his face further into your neck, if it was even possible.

"am i.. even worth being an idol?" beomgyu suddenly asked, your hands coming to a halt as you looked at beomgyu's doe eyes. you could hear your heart shattering at the question, beomgyu, out of everyone, shouldn't think like that.

"of course you are, you're like the best, have you seen yourself on stage? you're literally amazing." you conplimented him as much as you could, trying to boost his self-esteem. beomgyu sighed, his grip around your waist tightening. "don't force yourself to tell me, i know it's hard for you to open up, i won't make you tell me everything you're concerned about." you reassured beomgyu, pushing him away to look into his watery eyes.

beomgyu whined, being away from your touch felt like he was going to die, he pulled you back into his embrace, "i want to tell you, you're the only one who understands how i feel." you nodded your head, listening to what beomgyu has to say, from him being physically and mentally exhausted from all the schedules to him getting mistreated by the company. even if you didn't say much, beomgyu knew that you wouldn't judge him for how he felt, he felt as if he could be himself around you, instead of being the rowdy, mischievious member he was, he could be quiet and calm around you.

"thanks for listening.." beomgyu pecked your lips multiple times, smiling into a longer kiss. you hummed into the kiss, tilting your head slightly for better access. beomgyu soon pulled away, placing his forehead on yours, "i love you."

you giggled, pulling him back into a tight hug, "i love you too beom."

and lay me down,

on the sun, the tender sun.

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