#disclaimer i am not religious i just like angels

[horrorofthemoths]

[pink-amethyst-tarot]

Looking for a sign?

a pick-a-card reading

Take a deep breath and let your intuition guide you. In the end, only you know what is truly best for you.

P I L E 1 P I L E 2 P I L E 3

pile 1

"You are a badass being, full of life, love & possibilities. Through this deck, may you find a path to your best self." Modern Witch Tarot Deck, Lisa Sterle

Page of Swords, Queen of Pentacles, Eight of Pentacles, Ten of Cups, The Emperor, Seven of Swords

It seems you are looking for the joy in life and you have been working really hard to find it. The thing is, you might be looking in the wrong places. You're looking right when you should be looking left. You aren't seeing your potential and how powerful, beautiful and magnificent you are. The things that you are trying to manifest want to come to you but you first have to look within.

Card from the Angel Answers Oracle Deck: Don't Stop!

I am reading this as your angels telling you that you are doing so well, even if things are uncomfortable right now. You have made amazing progress, and you should acknowledge that. If you look back on who you used to be and where you used to be, you will notice that you have made some amazing strides forward. Don't give up on you. There is a reality that you want to live in and it's calling for you, but it can get to you if you don't meet it in the middle.

I hope you enjoyed this reading, if you would like to get a more person look into your situation, see this post.

pile 2

Six of Swords, Three of Swords, Five of Wands, Death, The World, Ace of Swords

Change is inevitable. There is a change that you have been resistant to because you don't want to be uncomfortable. You're so used to one side of the river, you're afraid to even think about going to the other side. This thing you are avoiding, it's not what you think it is. Change, good or bad, can be uncomfortable. It's still going to happen, though. You will not be able to please everyone but you will be happier, in the end. It's not your problem if there are people that don't understand what you're doing or what you want. They are either along for the ride or they can stay home. You know what the right choice is.

Card from the Angel Answers Oracle Deck: YES

There's your answer. The answer is yes. I'm hearing Say Yes by Floetry; all you gotta do is say yes, don't deny what you feel. Once again you know what you need to do, what you want to do. You just wanted someone else to say it so I'm saying it. Don't think of all the reasons why you think it's a flute. Your angels/guides/the universe doesn't do flukes. If it's for you, it will find you. The answer is yes. Yes.

I hope you enjoyed this reading, if you would like to get a more person look into your situation, see this post.

Pile 3

Queen of Wands, Ace of Wands, The Devil, Temperance, King of Wands, Justice

First thing I heard was, "leave him alone." Now, this is a general reading so apply the pronouns and genders this will apply to. You are doing something that you know is wrong but it feels damn good. It makes you feel powerful. You're aware that something is off. Maybe a power imbalance. If you don't cut this out now, it will bite you in the ass very quickly and painfully. It's time for you to take control of the narrative again and do right by yourself.

Card from the Angel Answers Oracle Deck: NOT THE RIGHT TIME and NO!

This has HEEEEELL NO energy to be quite frank. Whatever you are doing or planning to do, just don't. Just avoid the mess and drama while/if you can.

I hope you enjoyed this reading, if you would like to get a more person look into your situation, see this post

LEGAL DISCLAIMER: FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES ONLY. These readings are not a substitute or replacement for any professional help or services. My readings are not a substitute for any form of professional legal, medical/psychiatric, relationship, religious/spiritual or financial/ business advice nor consultations. You should always see a professional legal/trained adviser for help in any matter. I am not responsible for any decisions/ actions you take.

[god-complex-12]

Atychiphobia II

— Paring; Cpt. John Price x male reader. Fandom; Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II

Atychiphobia: (n.) fear of failure; fear of not being good enough

Quote; “When you repent, you make a promise to turn away from the sin… abandon it. But, Jonathan… you are my sin, and I am incapable of abandoning my love for you.”

Disclaimer; Mention of religion. Reader is an Angel. Religious based. Christianity. Talks of sinning. Reader is a fallen Angel. Descriptions of pain and blood. Not an accurate representation of Christianity. God is referred to as “father” and is depicted as slightly cruel. Kissing. Crying. Praying. Begging for forgiveness. Religious trauma. Tending to wounds. Reader is in the bath. John helps Y/N in the bath.

Word Count: 1.0k

Masterlist; part I

A/N: Please note that I do not believe this is how God truly is, this is for the sake of entertainment purposes only.

John is speechless as he stares at the torn and bloodied skin of his comrade. It’s revolting. Though this is nowhere near the worst John has ever seen, what brings him to a shake is what used to be in its place. Wings? No, that couldn’t be possible. Y/N had never had wings. Heaven and hell existed? John isn’t sure if that was something he wished was confirmed. He’s damned. But so is Y/N. Damned because of him, perhaps.

John gently poured the disinfectant onto the massive wounds. Y/N shuddered and sobbed. He wasn’t used to pain. Suddenly he felt unmeasurably weak. He’s mortal. This wasn’t fair. Since when was love a sin? And why was the punishment so cruel? Y/N’s fists balled, and his jaw clenched.

“Relax.” John whispered in the softest voice his gruff voice could manage. “It’ll pass.” He gently washed the dry blood from Y/N’s back. The warm water stung horribly, making Y/N tremble more. He sobbed silently into his hands. John was overwhelmed, but he didn’t let that stop him from taking care of the now man in front of him.

John dried his hands off on the towel next to him. He heard Y/N begin to whisper as he opened the box of medical supplies next to him. He knew what he was doing. “Y/N, stop.” He said sternly. However, Y/N did not stop. He continued to whisper to himself like a mad man. Whispering what, both of them knew, was a prayer that would fall on deaf ears. “Shh,” John shushed, “please.” He ran his hand over Y/N’s bare shoulder, he gently pushed the fallen angel a bit forward to gain better access to his wounds.

Padding the area with a cloth, Y/N made a pained noise and began praying more vigorously. John dried the area, and he wrapped Y/N’s torso in plaster. “He forgives all,” John whispered, “but why not you?” He pulled the sobbing soldier back towards him.

“Because I can’t seem to make a change.” He wiped his useless tears, getting a handful of water and drawing his flushed face. His voice trembles, as does his body. “When you repent, you make a promise to turn away from the sin… abandon it. But, Jonathan… you are my sin, and I am incapable of abandoning my love for you.”

“Your holy position is more important than man’s attention, is it not?”

“No.” Y/N said firmly. “Not when that man is you. I am a disgrace for committing the blasphemous act of loving one more than my creator. Not only have I chosen man over God, but I have committed a sacrilege act in allowing lust to cloud my faith.”

“Lust?” John questioned. “Do you mean this is all just lust?”

Y/N’s eyes widened, and he spun around, water sloshing over the side of the tub. His wet hands grab John’s knee in an act of desperation. “No, no. This is love. I love you more than anything, and that is a problem. I am referring to the time we’ve gone farther than just touching hands. That was lust.”

“Was it?” John asked, his hand gently trailing up the side of the Fallen Angel’s neck, pushing around the wet strands of hair that clung to Y/N’s skin. “Because I didn’t sleep with you for the sake of your body.” He leaned closer. “I did it for the sake of love. The passion. I hold myself back, so when it happens, it feels even better.”

“That is why we are supposed to wait till marriage bonds us, though even then, Father would not be accepting of devious acts unless it is to reproduce… which I am unable to do either with man or woman.”

“This isn’t about his rules. This is about you and me. I don’t care about his incorrect judgment, and neither should you. His judgment only brought you immense pain. Should you still speak highly of a God who causes you only suffering?”

Y/N was stunned for a moment, stumbling to find the right words, but the pain, overwhelming reality, the closeness of their lips, it made his mind bug out. “I- He did not only cause me suffering. He has also given me life!” He sat on his knees. “If not for his orders, we would have never met!”

“Then why does he punish you when he was the one who caused us to love?” A silence engulfs them. Y/N is speechless, and he feels his breath quicken with each passing second. It’s all too much. His chest feels heavy, and he feels as though someone had covered his face with a pillow and watched him squirm around for a pocket of air. “Let us love without him, Y/N. Let me love you.”

“Okay,” Y/N whispered, almost inaudibly.

Suddenly, John’s lips find Y/N’s, leaning down in his seat as he kisses Y/N with a tenderness he’s never held before. John can help but keep leaning forward, if not for his own gear, he would just go ahead and get in the bath as well.

[thecrazyalchemist]

I've recently seen a post on Tumblr that just, 'broke' something in me (for a lack of a better term).

So I just want to vent about it and another thing that's been bothering me.

(Disclaimer: this is a vent post. I am not an expert in the topics discussed. What I say is knowledge that I have learned from all kinds of places (school, history classes, researching for history projects, reading first hand written material from archives, and other places) and I don't have much the energy to compile everything source into a list (if I can even remember them). However, if you want to add, argue against, or argue in favor of something said here, correct me, you're welcome! Although, please act civil and cite your sources please. (I know I didn't and I'm sorry, but also please remember this is a vent post.) so anyways, here we start)

So, first of all:

Let's talk about Zionism. What does it mean?

To me, it seems that a lot of people think Zionism is something along the lines of 'racist bloodthirsty monstrous baby murderer and cold blooded killer and a rapist pedophile' since I keep seeing the word 'Zionist' in DNI lists next to 'nazis', 'pedophiles', 'minor attracted people', and other stuff like that.

I would love to hear what you think its definition is and I would love to hear where did you learn it, or perhaps any sources for such a definition.

Here's a brief recap of how Zionism was formed and what it is:

Zionism means the desire for Jewish self determination and self governing to exist/continue in the land/country of Israel.

It is an umbrella term, like the term queer, for example.

Zionism has deep roots in Judaism. A lot of practices and rituals in Judaism involve or are related to Israel. The name Israel comes from the name Jacob got from the angel he defeated, and after him the whole tribe of the Jewish people and the area are called Israel. The name Israel is in one of the most basic Jewish prayers - Shema Israel. Also, at the end of every pesach (Passover) Seder we say "Leshana habaa beyerushalaim habnuia" - next year in built Jerusalem. Jewish people have said so ever since the diaspora started.

Before the state of Israel existed, Zionism was about how to create and build Israel.

Three examples:

Political Zionism - create Israel by first getting a charter and international recognition and funding.

Practical Zionism - create Israel by first buying land, building settlements and developing the area.

Synthetic Zionism - a merge between the two movements above. Afaik most of the early political leaders of Israel were from that movement (for example, the first Israeli prime minister - David Ben Gurion).

Nowadays, Zionism is more vague. The reason for is that Israel already exits. The different movements on how to create Israel are kind of irrelevant now, because it exists now. The discussion on how to run Israel is perhaps what one may define as different movements within Zionism in modern time, however yet almost always when one says they are a Zionist, they mean they desire/want/believe that Israel should exist. That's it.

As such, Zionism alone doesn't say almost anything about the political view of the person who identifies as a Zionist.

Afaik basically 100% of Israeli Jews and around 80% of the Jews in America identify as Zionist. Under *this* definition.

Now because Israel exists, it's much harder to talk about different movements within Zionism which aren't basically political movements within Israel.

That leads me onto Kahanism.

Kahanism is an extremist far-right nationalist-racist religious Zionist movement (that I completely do not, I repeat: **do not** agree with). It was founded by the rabbi Meir Kahane, which believed that Jews should rule the whole area which was the kingdom of Israel in the days of the Tanach and should kill anyone who's an enemy of the Jewish people (which according to him, is basically everyone).

Here's an article that sums up some of my feelings about it in relation to the current events:

[https://archive.ph/2024.06.10-191347/https://www.haaretz.com/opinion/2024-06-10/ty-article-opinion/.premium/forget-being-anti-zionists-lets-be-anti-kahanists/00000190-0228-d660-af95-6fbed3e60000]

Now on to the post that 'broke the camel's back', per say.

The post said “I think that all Israelis should go back to Europe” and that it would solve all the problems here.

Let's try to break down the sentence “all Israelis should go back to Europe”. That sentence implies that that's where *all* Israelis came from.

What's "Israeli"? Afaik, since Israel is a country, Israeli is anyone who has Israeli citizenship (and some may even add 'and/or everyone who was born here').

What's Israel's population demographic? According to official government surveys, Israel has around ~9.9 million citizens, out of which ~73% (~7.227 million) are Jewish, ~21% (2.079 million) are Arab and the rest ~6% (0.594 million or 594 thousand) are classified as else.

The Arab population of Israel (which has equal rights as the Jewish population in Israel) and the Arab population of Gaza and the West Bank originate from the same group of people. Some of them originate from Arab people who had been here for hundreds of years (since the empires age) and many originate from Arab immigration between the end of the WW1 and the establishment of Israel.

Even if you claim that the Arab population of Gaza and the West Bank are the actual indigenous population of this area (despite numerous archeological and historical evidence pointing otherwise, although they do have a long history here), you cannot claim that just because a person was born or even just lived on the other (wrong, in your eyes) side of a border they aren't indigenous to the area!

In Israel, there are also a lot of minorities who are persecuted in other parts of the middle east. Such as: Druze, Armenians, Circassians and more. They have to go to Europe too? No, just the Jews? Surely this isn't antisemitism!

And let's talk about the Jewish population in Israel. MOST JEWS DID NOT COME FROM EUROPE! There are Jews who came from diaspora in Iran, Iraq, Yemen, Saudia, Ethiopia and a whole lot other countries through the middle east, south west Asia and north Africa. They have to go to Europe too?

And that's beside two other important facts: first of all, the Jews are indigenous to the levant. We are indigenous to the land of Israel.

And of course, do you now what happened to Jews all over the world, and especially Europe?

To name a few very notable examples: *The Spanish inquisition*, Kishinev pogrom, Jedwabne pogrom, *The Holocaust*, what that happened in the Soviet Union and many more pogroms, expulsions and massacares. (There were of course also pogroms in the MENA countries, however *I* haven't learned about them. Two examples I am told is notable is the farhood pogrom and the Holocaust in North Africa).

All throughout history, the Jews were expelled and massacred from almost every place. You then expectus to just come back to those places as if nothing has happened?

You want us to come so badly. Can you prove that we are safe to come? That we *have a place to come to*? Because so far you haven't shown that.

That when you and the people around you see a Jew, you won't immediately turn them into the scapegoat of every problom you have and then rape and/or expell and/or kill them.

And also, how would that solve more problems than it will create? Exchanging around ~2 million refugees for ~9.9 million refugees? How would that help? And even if you only mean the Jews (which I can't see how it isn't antisemitic) it's ok cause it's Jews? (which is even more antisemitic)

So no, it would not solve any problems. The country of Israel won't go anywhere, the Jews won't go anywhere, because we don't have anywhere to go - we were born here and we are staying.

However, yes, just as well, the Palestinians will probably not go anywhere (*not talking about Hamas and other similar groups here*). The only way to solve the situation is to unpack and deescalate those decades of conflict and escalation and hate, which will take a lot of work.

[voiidlizrd]

“Just a Sign, Lord, Anything”

(Nightbringer! Simeon x GN! Reader)

───────────────

Disclaimer(s): religious imagery, mentions of God, Celestial War spoilers, longing Simeon, religious doubt, blasphemy(?), angst, lots of angst, hints of poly MC, mentions of Lilith, slight Nightbringer spoilers for lessons 10-12 (I believe)

(A/N): I was scrolling through Twitter when I saw an entry of Aziraphale’s diary from Good Omens and thought of Simeon with Demon MC in Nightbringer. I’ll put a picture of the entry at the end of the fic, but if I am hurting, I will share with the masses so I won’t be alone.

⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅

Simeon is an archangel of God, mighty and powerful, yet so gentle and warm, embracing all and protecting every soul to guide them to Fathers Holy Light. Simeon, the archangel, who felt his heart shatter when he was forced to battle his Brothers, especially Lucifer, the one who he loved the most. He wept for days after their fall, the halls of Heaven were so much more colder after they left. Micheal couldn’t even comfort him, no matter how hard he tried. Heaven was warm, still, but quiet after the War. But Simeon had to move on, he knew.

But then he had the visitation from Diavolo to join the student transfer program to unite the realms. His heart clenched, stomach twisting in knots as he looked down at the letter clutched in his hands, he was close to shaking. In the Devildom, there would be demons, and with the demons, there would be the Brothers, but no Lilith.

He was fearful, even more fearful since that day.

Simeon was scared to go, but he had to. A part of him wanted to see this unification project through. He wanted to see the Brothers again, to be able to talk to Asmodeus, to drink coffee with Lucifer, to try and convince Mammon to stray away from his little pranks on his poor big brother.

Oh to have those mornings with them again, but he had to move on from the past. They would not be the same since the fall, especially now that they are slowly adapting to the Devildom. Maybe he was being a bit hopeful; delusion? But he could only wonder and question; have they been well? Are they okay? Are the demons welcoming them? Is Diavolo taking caring of them? Where are they living? Where would he live? Would he be with them?

His mind raced and he couldn’t pick a single one to fix himself to, for now, all he could do was pack his bags and be off with Luke.

When he arrived, was met with the expected reluctance, the heavy tension still lingering in the air, and the stiff presence of Lucifer who hung around him, protectively guarding his brothers.

But what he wasn’t expecting was you.

“Hello, you must be Simeon, right? My name is MC, the demon that is watching over the brothers during their stay of the Devildom!” You smiled at him so warmly, a warmth that he would expect to see from a fellow angel, as you held out your hand for him to take.

He felt his heart catch his throat when he looked into your eyes, a glitter in them that made him feel oddly nostalgic. His heart pounded, his knees felt weak, his skin was tingly as he grasped your hand, shaking it firmly. It was an odd feeling, a feeling he couldn’t quite explain when he met your eyes. They were so inviting, comforting, something he did not expect to see from any demon, like looking into the eyes of an old love.

Simeon shook himself out of his strange moment of vulnerability, silently, his guard was up. You were a demon. He could smell it on you, could feel the aura of your magic pulsing around you, sending a shiver down your spine. With the feeling alone, he felt it could take a single snap of your fingers and all realms could crumble.

But those eyes spoke otherwise.

“Ah, it’s good to know that Lucifer and the others are being taken care of.” Simeon smiled gently to you, retracting his hand, the tingle of your touch on his palm.

“Psh, it ain’t like we need the help. But Diavolo insisted.” Mammon crossed his arms, unconsciously leaning close to your side.

Simeon noticed this.

He only smiled while he watched you interact with the brothers for days after he arrived. The way you comforted Asmodeus and immediately noticed something was wrong, even if the facade he put up was practically perfect. The way you could calm Satan down. The way you brightened Mammons day, bring a smile and confidence to Leviathan, know exactly when Beelzebub was hungry and have everything on you immediately, carry Belphegor whenever he was sleepy and find a place for him to nap, and most of all, you’d always take care of Lucifer. Bring him coffee, make him food and snacks, convince him to sleep at odd hours.

You were more than he expected. It made his heart flutter at these acts of kindness, to see you beam with pride whenever you did these acts with nothing to gain in return, to see you be the safe haven for the brothers when they are ostracized by the demons of the Devildom, even despite their status. You were the arms of heaven that they couldn’t reach anymore, you were the home they deserved, the love they needed, and he saw it.

Lucifer looked at you with such softness, even when his words would even feel like nails against the skin, even to Simeon.

Mammon was greedy, constantly wanting your attention and words of praise, melting into your touch and wanting nothing more than to hold you.

Leviathan was a bit confident whenever he spoke to you, being proud to speak little by little about his interests, finding his home in your arms much like his brother.

Asmodeus admitted to wanting to stare at you for hours, and there are days where he finds Asmodeus staring at his phone, looking at pictures of you and him together with a smile on his face and cheeks pink.

Satan is… A hard on for Simeon to read, but the only noticeable thing Simeon can see is the anger vanish as soon as you enter the room or come near him, leaning in close to you to melt into your touch.

Beelzebub shared his food with you always, making sure you take the first bite and watch you as you eat. Seeing you eat, he could tell, brought him joy knowing you enjoyed it as much as he did.

Belphegor was a demanding one, the youngest of the seven, the one who is spoiled the most aside from Mammon. He would always come to you and lay himself on you when you were sitting, or sit in your lap, promptly falling asleep on you happily.

Simeon noticed all of those, his heart clenching whenever he saw these little things. He wasn’t expecting to feel so much love inside the home, to see it for himself, to see that a demon is the one causing the House of Lamentations to feel so… Welcoming, so much like home.

And he wasn’t even going to start with Solomon, the human with hundreds of pacts and as powerful as you. The way he acted like a newlywed husband was clear in how he held you. It was even more strange to see the brothers get quickly jealous over Solomon, especially knowing you’d have to leave and go back to your home, where you live, with him.

The looks of admiration were even clear on Diavolo’s face! And even his butler!

It baffled Simeon.

It bugged him to no end. A demon like you had the whole Devildom wrapped around your finger. You could easily crush it under your thumb, bring the entire realm to its knees, yet you cradled it in your hands like it was home, feeling yourself only a resident living your life.

Everytime he saw this, everytime he saw you whenever you showed up to HOL, his heart fluttered and he barely knew how to speak, finding himself trapped in those eyes again, close to drowning in them again, submitting to the love that you emitted everywhere you went, so much love you wanted to give. He found himself envious, just like the brothers would be whenever Solomon showed off his relationship with you. Craving you. Desiring you.

It was wrong.

He knew he shouldn’t, he couldn’t. It was wrong.

So he resisted you while being kind, promising himself that he wouldn’t fall into the arms of your warmth. He promised himself to Heaven, and Heaven alone, to his Father and Their love.

But then it was that day he found out that it would be more difficult than he anticipated.

Simeon and Luke were in the kitchen together, attempting to bake whatever they could to gather experience with Devildom’s strange ingredients. Simeon had his back turned for only a moment, failing to see Luke attempting to climb the counter to grab the flour that was on the top shelf, when he found himself tumbling backwards with the flour coming down as well. Simeon turned around to grab Luke when he heard the little Angel yelp out, when you suddenly appeared and grabbed Luke into your arms, the flour hitting your head and spraying all over you and onto the floor. Luke looked up at you horrified as you coughed and clutched your eyes close tightly, sputtering to get the bland, thick flour out of your mouth.

“Well… This was unexpected.” You coughed out.

“MC!?” Luke gaped at you, the look on his face was of pure guilt but also embarrassment with you holding him. “P-Put me down!… Please?”

He figured saying please was the least he could do to the person holding him and the one who saved him from having to suffer a huge bump on the back of his head, even if his savior was a demon. He plopped himself on the ground and looked about at the flour, flushing with embarrassment.

“Are you okay Luke?” You asked, wiping the flour off your face.

His face darkened with red and looked down, nodding silently, and then running off to grab something to clean up the flour.

That left you and Simeon alone.

His heart was already thumping hard as he looked at you. You were so beautiful even with flour all over you, that smile running across your face as you looked at him, that sheepish grin that set his heart ablaze.

“Sorry about that Simeon. You didn’t get any flour on you, did you?”

He shook his head. Heart trapped in his throat as he swallowed. He couldn’t bring himself to speak.

“That’s good! I actually came here to ask if you wanted to see the stars with me tonight before, uh, you know…” you gestured to the flour and chuckled a little. “But, do you wanna see the stars with me tonight? You don’t have to if you’re busy, I just wanted to know if you’d like to see the Devildom constellations with me. Belphegor is grounded after cursing Lucifer’s ties again.”

He couldn’t. This was dangerous, he can’t say yes to you. This feeling would only worsen. Saying yes would mean burying himself further into the possibility of giving into the temptation.

“Yes, I’d love to.”

⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅

The stars were beautiful, especially reflected in the color of your eyes, lighting them up as you stared up at the glass of the observatory, the stars lighting up the dark room as the two of you laid out on the ground with a blanket beneath you to make the two of you comfortable.

The stars were so beautiful, but you were more than the stars themselves, you were greater than the light above and he believed it deep down, even if he were to try and deny it. He understood what the brothers saw when they looked at you, the feeling inside of them that swelled inside, so close to bursting whenever he was near you. It was so unbearable, but he couldn’t get enough. It was a sin to be as greedy as this. The guilt followed him whenever this feeling occurred, but the overwhelming love would cloud over it, making it easier to bear, just a little.

“And that one, it looks similar to the one back in the human realm. It’s called the Libra, I think. But I’m not exactly sure.”

“You know a lot about the human realm and their stars, but not of the Devildom’s?”

“Ahh yeah… Is it wrong to say I was more interested in the stars of the other realms than in the Devildom?” You gave him that sheepish grin again, a small bit of sweat going down your brow.

He could tell you were lying. But said nothing. The lie went straight over his head because the smile you wore shrouded any doubt or concern he had. And that was wrong for an Angel to do, wasn’t it?

“No, no… Not at all.”

Then the silence. It left him alone with you and his thoughts, the feeling of you nearby made him warm inside. The more you inched closer, the more it grew, a fire inside of him growing hotter and hotter, the craving of greed to have and to hold you beginning to form, but he beat those thoughts down. They wavered the moment your hands touched, just a little.

“I hope to get to know you more, Simeon.” You whispered, his name on your lips sounding oh so sweet, sweeter than any cake or pastry, oh so sickening.

“And I, too, MC.” Your name flowed off his tongue, as if he were exhaling it just like he breathed it, your very existence hanging off your name on his tongue, burying itself inside of his chest and filling him. He wanted nothing more than to speak your name over and over, to call onto you every second of the day, to try and quell the desire that bubbled inside of him, but at the same time, wanting nothing more than to let this feeling simmer inside of him. He never wanted a moment to get enough of you.

But it was wrong to put something above the Divine.

The time passed and you were asleep right beside him, head lulled to the side and close to his shoulder, the feeling of your hair tickling against his skin.

He stared up at the stars, the simmering of his desire and his guilt fulling growing inside of him like a tight knot only growing tighter and tighter.

The thoughts of craving your touch, of wanting to feel your lips pressed against his skin, his lips, his face. To feel nothing more than your back pressed against his chest while in the kitchen, baking sweets and sharing a moment of being domestic like you’d be with Solomon.

Father, I don’t ask You for much, it’s not my place to ask and Angels don’t pray.

As he stared up at the stars he couldn’t help but feel his lower lip tremble and fists clench when you shifted yourself closer to him unconsciously, nuzzling yourself further into him, a small smile on your face.

But if you could give me a hint. Just a little one. Anything really.

He unclenched his fists, chest so much heavier than it was previously, fingers twitching as your hand was so much closer to his, the warmth of your body radiating onto him as you cuddled into his side while he laid there stiffly.

Is this a test?

“Simeon, as the brothers attendant and yours, I’d like to offer my help anyway I can. You are welcome here as far as I’m concerned. Any issue you have, let me know.” That smile again… Oh that smile and those eyes, those imperfections that came with that only added to your complexion, that only added to you.

I’m sure I’m being foolish. You’re far too busy to waste Your valuable time with a lowly angel like me.

But is it?

“Thank you for taking care of the brothers while I was in my coma, Simeon… I cant thank you enough and I truly can’t thank you enough…” You brought him into a hug, the warmth of your body much like how you’re cuddling him. “Even though I don’t regret what I did, I’m glad you were around for them when I couldn’t.”

Is MC my apple?

I’ve said no to them so many times… Yet they keep coming back everytime…

“Please, MC, I don’t need you to tell me how to handle my… ‘problems’ that I might have with the brothers. I appreciate your help, but I don’t need a demon to tell me how to deal with my problems.”

He doesn’t mean that. He needs your help desperately. He needs to know how he can make himself more approachable to the brothers, more close to them as he was before.

“That’s just fine. If you ever need me, Ill always be around for you.”

When everything else is uncertain, they are there.

I don’t want to disappoint You, Father, I don’t want to fail You. Everyday we grow closer, and everyday…

He brings his hand close to yours.

Simeon turns his head, your head close to his, his forehead touched yours. He turned his body to where he mirrored your position, his forehead still touching yours and he exhaled lightly, a shaky breath leaving him, tears close to escaping his eyes as his lip trembled, holding your hand in his tightly, feeling the warmth as if it would be for but a fleeting moment, the guilt only worsening but he couldn’t bare to find himself pull away from your warmth. The rise and fall of your chest hypnotizing to him, you looking so peaceful, even when you were just a demon. Your lips were so close to his with how his forehead was pressed against yours, so delectable and looking so soft and sweet.

I don’t know if my resolve can last much longer…

Please, Father, just a sign. Anything.

⋅───⊱༺ ♰ ༻⊰───⋅

Here is the picture I found on Twitter, I’m currently sobbing and will need to recover.

[inevitably-ineffable-husbands]

Crowley's Past: Was He Archangel Camael?

With S2 now having been out for a few weeks, and the theories running wild, I think one of the unanimous beliefs within the fandom is that Crowley was SOME sort of Important Angel Before™. I touch upon the MANY clues in the various parts of my initial GOS2 Thoughts Meta, so I won't go into too many of those here, but inevitably this separate meta started out as the pulling-and-expanding-upon of the Archangel Crowley theory, primarily the "Raphael" theory, since I have loved that theory to bits since its inception early post-S1.

That was until my friend Peter finished watching the season early last week, and presented to me an alternative theory as to Crowley's identity that I thought deserved its own post breakdown, since I haven't seen this theory before.

NOW, I should make it clear I haven't been as DEEP in the fandom as many of y'all since S1 aired, so it's probably come up before S2 as just a light mention, but I personally haven't seen anything, so what follows is a joint speculation between my real-life, not-in-GO-fandom-spaces-whatsoever friend Peter, and myself, with my contributions being the expansion of his theory and linking it to what we already know.

The theory is this: Crowley might actually be Archangel Camael.

Please, PLEASE note that I am aware that authors and writers change things for creative liberty and originality, so please take this entire theory with a grain of salt (or go nuts with me, I'm happy either way!).

I'll TRY to keep this concise, but y'all know me. You can skip right to the "Conclusion" for a point-by-point breakdown if you don't want to read everything, but I hope you'll at least give me a chance to explain within the body of this meta.

I apologize in advance if any of my thoughts are a bit scattered. Here we go:

The Initial Text

Here is the initial text Peter sent to me after he finished watching S2 (and this was after I mentioned that the popular running fandom theory is that he's actually Raphael):

Okay… well - disclaimer I did not go to religious school and my biblical studies were a great many years ago. As I recall Lucifer was not one of the 7 archangels - he was meant to be but he rebelled before he was appointed (and there is some wiggle for a fictional story). So, based on what we have seen Crowley was one of the 7 but he hung out with the wrong people and asked too many questions. He never says his real name when we see him as an angel it is comically dodged - for a good reason. Crowley has a login and proves he had clearance way above a level 37th angel. He can see the top most important meetings… like he may have been allowed to attend in a previous life… And one line sticks out to me “one fallen prince has already gone to Hell. Two shows a problem.” As I stated Lucifer was not a Prince - we are not talking about him. Gabriel was banking on going to Hell like his “brother” - I’m guessing Camael, the one who Sees God - who ironically has cursed eyes now as a demon - the Prince of Fortitude (also Love and Charity). He often breaks his demonic spirit in cases of charitable needs or love. Crowley is one of the big Seven to be entrusted with creating the cosmos ;)

Naturally, this had a lot of things click for me, and I'm going to break them down below, with my additional research into the points that Peter made since he mentioned that he was going off memory.

Who Was Cameal?

When Peter mentioned this angel, it boggled my mind that I never actually recall knowing of this archangel. I went to a Roman Catholic school up until Grade 12, and with that comes Religious Ed classes, which also feature World Religions in the later grades. Funnily enough, I found out WHY I never heard of Camael:

Camael is not recognized by the Catholic Church due to the Vatican's decision to ban the veneration of angels not mentioned in the Bible [SOURCE]

Kind of explains why I only heard of Gabriel, Michael, and Raphael (which now adds another layer to a theory I will cover further down in "Does Crowley Remember?"), then.

Reading further:

[He] is the Archangel of strength, courage and war in Christian and Jewish mythology and angelology. [SOURCE] He is claimed to be the leader of the forces that expelled Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden holding a flaming sword. However, in iconography he is often depicted holding a cup. [SOURCE]

A Flaming Sword, you say??? Interesting. Here's a good place to point out that there IS also a theory that Crowley and Aziraphale are one single archangel that was split into two (and Gaiman has stated that in original drafts of the original book, they were at first one character, so this fact might be an afterthought of that original idea). Also, interesting that this angel is depicted with a cup, traditionally used in Christianity to depict wine, which is Crowley's drink-of-choice. So, there's that.

Another standout point for me is the Adam and Eve bit (which I bolded above). The Snake of Eden is TECHNICALLY the instigator (the "leader") who encouraged the expulsion of Adam and Eve from the Garden. "Forces" in this reading of it could be the metaphorical definition of it; the knowledge of good and evil, and the desire to see beyond the Garden. AND also the Flaming Sword itself BEING the object of force given to the couple for protection.

Furthermore, Crowley's a strong and brave character, given all the shit he endures time and time again. Strength (and bravery for that matter) can mean many things: emotional strength, physical strength, possibly also a strength of character and an unwavering belief in the values one holds dear. I should also note that it's interesting that an angel of war, should Crowley indeed be this character, wants nothing to do with a war and is actively trying to stop one: an angel of War can absolutely NOT want a war, because he knows it's wrong.

And without the Angel of War up in Heaven to PREVENT any war at all? Well, they would just get all willy-nilly crazy on the idea of War without having any pushback on it, wouldn't they?

Kind of like how Gabriel was to be demoted (cast out) for denying Heaven a War. Funny old world, isn't it? Seems the parallels write themselves.

What's in a Name?

Because Peter mentioned the name meaning, I had to look into it myself, and indeed, one of the various meanings of Camael is apparently "he who sees God" in Hebrew.

As Peter stated above, I think this is very significant because it's seemingly only Crowley who has "demon" eyes that he himself cannot change. It's the ONLY part of him that always remains a constant, and why he is forced to hide them. We know from S1 and bits of S2 with Shax that other demons can change their eyes because we see them mimicking other humans time and again without the black eyes if they choose to.

Crowley's eyes could have been cursed specifically because was ordained as "the one who sees God" and possibly was the ONLY angel who ever "saw" a physical God in the literal sense (it's implied in the show that no one actually SEES a physical god). It's possible that Crowley being cast out literally burned his angelic eyes and left a visible scar that can't be fixed or erased – a forever-reminder of what he did and can no longer do. AND as the one who sees God, he indeed was a very high-ranking angel.

In the GO universe, I suspect he was indeed the FIRST Supreme Archangel, tasked with creating God's Vision (HAH) of the Universe. And when Crowley questioned what the point of creating such beauty was only for it to be destroyed, God (or, I suspect more likely, the other Angels) saw it as Crowley questioning their "vision" in the metaphorical sense.

Does Crowley Remember?

In light of Season 2, and some interesting exchanges and moments of Crowley with other angels, some people speculate (and as I watch the series more, I'm starting to also agree somewhat) that Crowley may not remember everything from Before.

Now, while I do like this theory a lot, and it makes sense with the context clues from S2, I don't think it's that he doesn't remember anything at all, however, as many versions of the theory postulates.

My speculation is this: what if, by having his Angelic Name removed from recognition in the Bible, and going through a similar Trial to Gabriel, THEN by Falling the traditional way, the memories are still there, but they're just a bit fuzzy and scattered? It could also explain why some of the other Archangels DON'T remember him... he was removed from the memories of other ranking angels (Saraqael is the only angel to seemingly remember who Crowley was, so I postulate that she WASN'T a top angel until fairly recently, because of the named angels in the next section).

The show brings up the Book of Life in S2 on several occasions, leaving me to believe that this will be an important item in the next season. What if the phrase "it will make it like you don't exist" literally means "don't exist in memories"? Maybe a Book of Life 1.0 existed at one time, and everyone who Fell was forgotten because their angelic names were removed. Because wouldn't that be more awful than never having existed? Remembering that you WERE something or someone, you had a name that you can't remember, that you WERE important to people and events, and having everyone around you who you considered family forget who you are? It's its own kind of personal Hell ... kind of like George Bailey in It's a Wonderful Life, a movie that references angels, funnily enough. And Crowley remembers the furniture being there but not where it all belongs. I think his memory haziness is also a side effect of Falling the traditional way (burning sulfer and all that jazz, possibly causes trauma amnesia?).

It's a stretch here, I know, but I thought I would put this one out there as a possibility as to what it could mean (given that Gaiman and Pratchett tend to "play on words" a lot, I think it is worth mentioning this as an alternative meaning).

In S2, when Gabriel was sentenced, the Trial stated that Gabriel would forget his time as Gabriel, but not his time as an angel. I think a similar thing happened with Crowley, only much more violently with the "burning the eyes out" and "staining his wings black" thing.

My friend Peter mentioned that the show avoided Crowley's Before-Name "to a comical degree". I reckon, rather, that Crowley just simply doesn't remember his Angelic name, and his changing of his demon names is him possibly trying to find an identity. I think he recalls it having started with a "C", maybe? And now he's a snake, so he's kind of crawl-y, must be "Crawley". As time moved forward and as he learned more and more about humanity, he changed is namee to fit in better. Having a full Human-esque name makes him feel more connected to the Humanity he prefers.

And because I'm a romantic sap at heart, I think he enjoys spending time with Aziraphale because perhaps some part of Azzie's presence helps Crowley remember bits and pieces of his broken memory. He is LITERALLY Crowley's Emotional Support Angel – remember Shax can read into people, it seems. Azzie brings comfort to him, and seeing another Angel that also questions the choices Heaven makes allows Crowley to feel less alone.

The Original Seven Archangels

It's brought up a couple to several times in S2 the point that "God loves sevens". I actually couldn't remember why Seven was such a big Biblical number so a bit of quick Googling reminded me that "Seven [...] communicated a sense of “fullness” or “completeness” [...]. This makes sense of the pervasive appearance of “seven” patterns in the Bible." (SOURCE).

And of course, after Peter had mentioned it, I had to look a bit more into who the Original 7 could possibly be. Wikipedia mentions it could be Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, Uriel, Camael, Jophiel, and Zadkiel.

Peter was correct in his assumption that Lucifer wasn't one of the original 7 archangels, so that leaves us with Raphael, Camael, Jophiel, and Zadkiel, if we're assuming that Crowley is one of these top Archangels.

I would also like to speculate that "God likes 7's" could also mean (if you allow me to reach a bit) "God's favourite angels are the initial 7". If Crowley happened to be one of these 7, it could explain why he's able to get into Heaven without raising alarm at all, why he still maintains his immense power that set off alarms in Heaven when it was used purposefully against Heaven, why he was able to access the Gabriel Files, and why Sarqael allowed Crowley to continue watching the Trial (because if God allowed Crowley access even when he's no longer an angel, then Sarqael has no reason to believe that he's still not important to God).

Perhaps, in Modern Day, only having four archangels making the decisions symbolizes that, indeed, God's not really calling the shots anymore – and hasn't been for a long time – and that the whole system is all broken and not complete.

It also begs the question: if Crowley was one of the Original Seven (if they are indeed going to go in that direction), what happened to the other three? Did they also suffer the same fates? Were they turned to Scriveners just like Gabriel was to be?

Here is where I will also throw out there that my random thought that Muriel possibly also may have been one of the other three, as my own expansion of this theory, but I digress.

Anyway, I think I found the original Fandom Wiki that Peter quick-referenced when doing his quick message to me, and it's very interesting:

How they were founded as a unit is unknown, but it is said that it happened during Lucifer's rebellion. When Lucifer rebelled against God, one entire choir of angels followed him and was lost. Many angels from other choirs also followed him in his rebellion. It is revealed that Lucifer was meant to be apart of the Seven Archangels as well, however, since his fall he was replaced by Camael. 

Disclaimer here that I understand that Fandom Wiki isn't THE BEST resource, but we're also talking about a fictional story that loosely references actual scripture, so I think it's valid enough, heh.

But I bring this point up because Peter links it to Metatron mentioning the "Prince of Heaven" falling, as Gabriel as being "another" one. "Another one" what?? We have to assume that Metatron means another "Supreme Archangel" as holding the title of "Prince of Heaven", meaning Gabriel was NOT the first and only Supreme Archangel. I don't think Metatron is referencing Lucifer here. In fact, they deliberately avoid saying a name. We just ASSUME that it was Lucifer because that's the "common knowledge".

If GO is going to reference the theory that Lucifer actually fell BEFORE becoming an Archangel, then that means in my theory Crowley became his replacement of the Original Seven. And given that he was possibly the One (and only angel, in my above theory) Who Sees God, he was in-turn given the position of Supreme Archangel, charged with creating, again, God's Vision of the Universe.

I think having Crowley be the one who witnesses Gabriel's Trial is important if we're going on the theory that they are mirrors of each other in S2. What if:

Crowley ALSO had a similar Trial when he questioned God (or the other Archangels) about "what's the point of" the destruction of the universe, then subsequently saying "nah" to having Armageddon 6,000 years before the events of S1?;

In said Trial, Gabriel was a presiding member, and, given that we know his prior cruelty from S1, he voted on Camael being cast out in a vicious and cruel fashion "for betraying God". Thus, his eyes burnt and forever scarred to prevent him from ever seeing God again, had his name and memories removed from the Book of Life, and sent to on a one way trip to Hell. I speculate this because Trial-Gabriel certainly believe he was going to "Fall" that way. I'd also wager Camael/Crowley was the last angel to ever "properly" Fall, which is why the modern angels still think that they do it this way, rather than the way they planned for Gabriel. I realize that this point DOES contradict my theory about the other missing Archangels quietly being erased and reassigned, but perhaps BECAUSE Gabriel is SO High up the chain, they HAD no choice but to make an example of him. Perhaps Metatron just quietly deleted the other Archangels' original names without anyone's knowledge.

We now know from S2 that regardless of an angel's status, the angels will veto against anyone who goes against their interpretation of The Great Plan. We now also know that the "Supreme Archangel" is also a "title only" job that has benefits only if you're going to go with the Majority Vote. And if you don't, they're going to make an example out of you.

And I reckon Camael/Crowley, just like Gabriel after, tried to "go his own way" (as quoted by the Metatron) and got banished for it.

Aziraphale really now has himself in a pickle, and I suspect that he will figure ALL of this out when he gets there.

And finally because this is the "Sevens" section of this meta, I also want to mention these "a-bit-reaching-but-still-plausible-theories" that I came across while I was researching:

This tweet speculates that Gabe is morse coding "7"

Michael tweeted 7 dots after S2 aired

CONCLUSION

While this theory doesn't outright bust the Raphael Theory (since there are some similarities with Crowley and Raphael within the theory), as well as the "he was Lucifer" theory (which I also really like, but Crowley mentioned in S1 he was "hanging out with Lucifer and the guys" before he fell, so... I'm more apt to not really run with this theory). BUT it does tie up a lot more things, and it connects things better than the Raphael one does, in my humble opinion.

The TL;DR of this entire post is this:

I think Crowley was an Archangel, that is the only CERTAIN thing I feel.

I think he was Camael, The One (and only angel) Who (Literally) Sees God. He was the First Supreme Archangel who created God's Vision of the Universe.

I think that Camael questioned the Council of Angels why they need to destroy beauty that God created. It didn't make sense to him.

They told him about Armageddon (the S1 one). As the angel of war, and as the Supreme Archangel who had final say, he said "nah". And he tried "to go his own way" to avoid Armageddon.

The Council and Metatron did not like this, saw it as blaspheming against God. Camael then had a Trial similar to Gabriel's.

I think this all happened shortly after the war that sent down Lucifer and the other rebelling Angels, so Heaven was still VERY tetchy about anyone who questioned God and The Great Plan. Because Camael was a Supreme Archangel, the original Prince of Heaven, this was seen as SEVERE betrayal of the Council. For the record, I think the "Before the Beginning" sequence takes place AFTER the War that created Hell.

My belief about the Book of Life is that its ACTUAL purpose is to remove people from being remembered, which is far worse of an existence for someone banished. A metaphorical interpretation of "removed from existence" simply could mean "and everyone forgot about you", à la It's a Wonderful Life, a movie that references "angels getting their wings".

Camael was sentenced in a way that would make an example of him to other angels to remind them of their place: He was cast out of Heaven, his angelic name erased from the Book of Life which caused his other Council Members at the time to forget him, and for him to have foggy memories in turn, although he KNOWS he was an angel (perhaps as a side effect of being cast out the traditional way, you are forced to remember that you once lived in Heaven). His eyes were burnt out to quite literally leave an unremovable scar so he could no longer "see" God and their vision, which explains why Crowley cannot ever change his eyes regardless of how he presents himself. He has to hide them away.

I think Crowley was the last angel to be cast out in this way. BUT because his ANGEL name was erased, none of the remaining Original Council angels (Gabriel, Michael, and Uriel) recognize him. I suspect Sarqael remembers him because she was NOT an Archangel at the time since she was not one of the Original Seven Archangels.

I also suspect that there are purposely missing Archangels for a reason, and the fact that only 4 rather than 7 seemingly run things symbolizes the problems in Heaven and that God has not been in charge for a long time. I think those missing 3 or 4 are actually Scriveners, who were quietly sentenced and erased by the Metatron, hence why Gabriel thought that he was going to be cast out like his predecessor. But because Gabriel WAS a Supreme Archangel, he HAD to be made an example of, just as Crowley before.

"Supreme Archangel" is a Title-Only job, and if you go against the Council, you are indeed made an example of. I think this is purposeful setup for S3 to show that Azzie is in DEEP shit.

EPILOGUE

I still want to expand upon my Angel Theory section from my S2 Meta, but for now, I am so pleased with how this turned out, and I hope you've enjoyed this Deep Dive into another Archangel Theory. I had a lot of fun with this one; I like learning about supernatural things, it's always interesting.

I am interested in others' thoughts on this theory, especially if your memory of your religious education is a bit better than mine! Feel free to expand upon this more, because I am an interactive blog, so it will be added to the post! <3

I hope you enjoyed, and thank you for reading!

[fantastic-rambles]

BSD Headcanon: Fyodor the Wandering Jew

(Warning: Spoilers for Chapters 112-113/Season 5)

Disclaimer: I am not religious in any way and mostly just have a passing knowledge of various bits of different religions, including Christianity. No blasphemy is intended in these wild ravings of an overly obsessed fan.

As always, I can be a bit rambly as I mostly throw my thoughts out as they come, so apologies if it's somewhat disorganized. Many of my claims/connections are very tenuous (in particular, the final jump to the Wandering Jew), and I understand that, which is why this is just a headcanon.

Fyodor has always been a rather enigmatic character in Bungou Stray Dogs. Sometimes referred to as a "demon," and with an intelligence that rivals that of characters including Ranpo and Dazai, he has repeatedly shown himself to be a formidable foe capable of manipulating a great number of people and devising plans that are quite difficult to overturn. He also seems to be very religious, speaking often of God and sin and seeming to believe in predestination. Furthermore, despite his significant role in many of the plots involving the Detective Agency--from apparently being, at the very least, an active observer of the Guild's actions to devising the "terrorism" plot--very little is known about him and his ability "Crime and Punishment" other than its ability to kill without the need for skin contact. Although fanon has come up with a fairly plausible mechanism for how his ability works, it has not yet been discovered or revealed in canon, even up until his "death."

Immortality

"Death" because I am not entirely convinced that Fyodor is actually dead, despite Dazai's claim in Chapter 112. In the most recent chapter (Chapter 113), it has been revealed that Fyodor has many more mysteries to him as Sigma struggles to process the information overload that is his memories. Most significantly, that he has been alive for a very long time: at the very least, from a time that appears to be during the Middle Ages, when Bram was still alive and whole. This, of course, shocks Sigma (though, to be fair, that isn't a great metric for "shock" as he is easily surprised 🤣), but at the very least, Fyodor is as old as Bram and does not appear to age.

At the time, he apparently was passing himself off as a traveling minstrel, and he claimed to have intentionally gotten himself caught for the sole purpose of getting a look at Bram to judge his character as "evil incarnate" (something that would have appealed to Fukuchi for many reasons in apprehending him centuries later, as a prerequisite of the Decay of Angels plan). Of course, this seems like a preposterous reason to throw yourself into the jaws of death, so Fyodor is believed to be a spy and sentenced to death the following day.

Assuming that he wasn't somehow saved/Bram wasn't incapacitated (possibly stabbed by the holy sword for the first time) in the intervening time and his sentence was carried out... that means that Fyodor somehow also survived being killed at the time, while gaining some information about Bram that would have been useful for his "future" plans. (Some more of my musings on that topic can be found here, though the anime covered most of the key points--and especially confirmed my central theory--when Untold Origins was animated.)

If he is immortal, this could also help explain why his ability did not attempt to kill him when they were separated by Shibusawa's mist in Dead Apple: the "reason" provided was that Fyodor was "crime" and his ability was "punishment," and that they were good friends, but if Fyodor is immortal for reasons that are not tied to his ability, then it simply couldn't kill him even if it wanted to.

His Goal

Of course, this then raises the question of how long Fyodor has actually been alive. Although he has lent his assistance to many others, in the end, as he told Bram, he is working for himself. But to what end?

Ostensibly, of course, to rid the world of the "sin" of abilities. But coupled with immortality, which is, more often than not, a curse rather than a blessing in the hundreds of works on the subject out there, it raises the question of whether he is just seeking his own death. Maybe that was even part of his reason for getting caught by Bram: because he wanted to see if another immortal could kill him. But if there is some sort of supernatural, non-ability-based reason for his immortality (or even ability-based but not lost during Dead Apple), perhaps there are conditions that must be satisfied for him to achieve this: it is not enough for him to merely commit suicide or be killed. Thus, all of his plots could just be the means to an end, literally, for him.

Surprisingly, he does seem to have a genuine belief in God, which is quite interesting for a control freak like Fyodor (distinguished from cults that use religion as a tool to control followers but whose leaders do not genuinely believe in God). Even so, he expresses an understanding of and even an admiration for Gogol's desire to defy God and "lose sight of himself."

Perhaps he, too, wishes that he could oppose God and achieve his own sort of "freedom" or "release from the yoke of sin" that is denied to him.

The Wandering Jew

Which leads to the equally curious Wandering Jew (at least, in my weird brain). His relationship to Jesus seems to be a subject of contention, but at its core, he is said to be someone fated/cursed to walk the Earth until the Second Coming (via Wikipedia).

In my opinion, it is possible that Fyodor has been alive since the time of Jesus--if not longer--given the vast amount of memories that Sigma has to sort through of "every single one of [his] secrets." Enough, Fyodor says, that he may never wake up, just as Atsushi needed some time to process the information about the "page" that he received from Sigma. Thus, if he committed a "crime" at the time that resulted in his being cursed with immortality (by a higher power, or perhaps Jesus' ability--I'll try not to go down that rabbit hole 🤣), he could have a reason to believe in God, and he could also believe that engineering some sort of Armageddon might finally free him from his mortal coil. Just because Fukuchi wanted to achieve world peace doesn't necessarily mean that was also Fyodor's goal: especially given how he has apparently been manipulating people for centuries, at the very least, someone as "simple" and idealistic as Fukuchi was probably easy for him to use. I also highly doubt that throwing him into Meursault would have interrupted Fyodor's plans in any significant way, even though Fukuchi seemed to think that it would.

Furthermore, although he currently passes himself off as Russian and has taken on an appropriate alias, he has also claimed to be a "traveling minstrel" without any official affiliations and was suspected of being Roman by Bram's guards... which could also strengthen the connection to his being a "wandering" Jew.

And if we want to stretch it even further, he could possibly be another wanderer: Cain, cursed to roam the Earth for the sin of killing his brother, Abel, with God's mark on him that would prevent him from being killed by anyone else/that would return an injury sevenfold. Which didn't kick in when Ace tried to brain him with a wine bottle, so this is less likely on my list of "possibilities" (a term I use very loosely here, as I don't really think any of them are probable).

Of course, there are also his "last words," which are (allegedly) Jesus' last words when he died on the cross, though I think that is more of Fyodor seeing himself as a Jesus-like figure than him supposed to be representing Jesus. (The Wandering Jew and Cain are already a stretch as they are. 🤣)

[starsinkpop]

ATEEZ Choi San Tarot Reading - Future Spouse

Disclaimer: I do tarot readings for fun, so please read them with a grain of salt. Don’t take my words too seriously and just keep an open mind. Tarot is a divination tool that can’t predict the future, as every single individual has their own will and makes their own decisions. Tarot should be seen as a guidance and a good friend that just has your best interest and gives you advice when needed. I’m not putting anyone in my readings on a pedestal nor am I trying to harm anyone. One last side note, I’m not a native speaker, so please excuse any wrong spellings or poor grammar.

Date of Reading: October 16th 2023

Decks: Ethereal Visions Tarot, Dreamscape Oracle, Romance Angel Oracle, Love Oracle, island time wellness love Oracle, Angel Answers Oracle Cards

VI The Lovers, Queen of Swords (R), Queen of Cups, Two of Cups, XIX The Sun, Knight of Swords (R)

someone with a very nurturing and giving nature

just a very sweet person who’s fun to be around

can be both introverted and extroverted (depends on the surroundings, situation and environment)

happy virus with lots of positive energy

they’re hard to bring down

even if they’re in a bad mood they would never show and keep a friendly and open “mask” on

because they don’t want others to feel responsible for their bad mood or problems

they don’t fear intimacy and vulnerability

this is someone who makes decisions from the heart

they have high moral standards

they very wise and intelligent

they take relationships (platonic, professional, or romantic, doesn’t matter) very serious

they don’t seem religious but could be quite spiritual

they have a 7th sense and could foresee the future in way?

it’s like, they have a feeling in their tummy when something bad or exciting is about to happen

they have no problem expressing their emotions and feelings

they will praise San a lot and San would just be so in love with that

they could deal with some family issues, maybe even have a broken family or ended contact with the family

they create a safe space for San to make easy for him to give and receive love

they rather focus on others than on themself

they love to love and are in love with life

very selfless and trustworthy person

San’s ride or die

they’re constantly working on themself to be the best version of themself

this is also someone who gets bored quite easily and keeps rebuilding their life whenever they’re full of it

I’m also seeing someone who always like to try new hobbies, they’ll obsess over that hobby for a few months and than hop onto the next new obsession/hobby

can go through a lot of physical changes on their looks, but is also someone who, in a way, looks good in everything

because they focus on others so much, they can seem a bit mysterious and sometimes lose themself for a moment

people don’t know much about them because they don’t really talk much about themself unless someone shows genuine interest in them

they have a healthy lifestyle

his fs is someone who always finds reason in everything that’s happening to them, whether it’s good or bad

they’re patient with everyone but themself

could be his soulmate, there’s definitely a soul connection between the two

with San and his fs it’s like they see each other for the first time and they know they’re meant to be together and are made for each other

if you want to believe in love at first sight I think that’s what they could experience (personally I think love evolves over time so more like a crush on first time imo but you get what I mean)

they’ve experienced a lot of pain, loss and cruelty in their life which is hard to believe for others because of their loving and kind nature

this is someone who always tries to see the best in others but at the same time will never buy anyone’s bs

they can be quite reckless if you mess with them or their loved ones

like, they will rip you into pieces (not literally) and find your weak spot, making sure you know your place - they will point out your insecurities and make you feel worthless if you’re being unfair, intolerant, close minded, and disrespectful

I’m getting the feeling this is someone who’s constantly underestimated

they’re seen as very beautiful by others but they don’t realize how stunning they look

a lot of their beauty also comes from their energy

I think they’re more cute than sexy

could appear quite innocent

I think they’re older than San but they look younger than they are

heavy water and air energy

Love,

~Nicky 🫧

Masterlist

[albontology]

would you be willing to explain the geochalex tag on the angel/fae/machine rules post. i am assuming george = machine rules but i don't know about alex or charles and i am interested

oh yeah great question!! thank you for asking, i'll say tl;dr: in my mind, george = fae rules, charles = angel rules, and alex = machine rules. reasoning and extreme yapping under the cut o7

first massive disclaimer is this is rpf-goggles equipped i dont actually know shit and am making half of this up. naturally. so from there.

so what initially drew me to think of that/tag the post as geochalex is because of the inherent disciplinary quality of being a driver: not only do f1 drivers have to abide by a multitude of rules, but they're often one of two representatives of a mass of people and a brand, and further they have to be in control of their bodies at all times. so in this very flowery sense, the figure of the driver is one defined in relation to the rules they have to abide by both in the established system and in the larger expectations of the industry. following that, the way that i matched geochalex to their respective alignments has to do with this framing of relationship of driver to authoritative power, the 'rule-arbiter'

the first and immediate association to me was george with fae rules because of his status as gpda prez and resident rulebook consumer. this has recency bias, ofc, but in particular, think back to all the posts on how george being called to the stewards is just an exercise in his memorization of the fia rulebook. george respects the rules and abides by them, but does not take them for face value, and is more than willing to flex his expertise with them to augment his own position in relation to them. there's also the association here of fia rules-fae rules as a power tied up in the nuances of class and society, though that's more tonally tenuous. the more important aesthetic consideration is those massive and haunting baby blue peepers of his. they must be borne of some sort of otherwordly magicks.

second is charles and angel rules. ofc, here, 'god' is the religiously fervent spirit of ferrari. was there ever any question. coming from a very catholic slant, the components of love, awe, and fear as necessary motivators to follow the rules are key. charles loves ferrari, and, i would say, does fear it in the christian sense of the word. to disobey ferrari, or to vocally express his displeasure with it (or its extensions i.e. engineers), is not necessarily disallowed, but like.. you can feel how those rifts kind of marr this massive tapestry of ferrari lore and how charles is woven into it. how do i express this?? the "irreversible consequences" of the og post has to do with how the entire ecosystem, legacy, and history of ferrari are tied up into how charles represents them, and how 'rule breaking' is not only a transgression but a betrayal.

finally is alex and machine/ai rules. alex, i love you, but this was a bit of a shoehorn to complete the trifecta. still, i think out of all three this one fits alex best, because, in the system of dynamics we've established, alex is the one that doesn't have this single entity to be set in opposition to. in the ai-allegory, alex is a cumulation of information he's gathered from various experience, and the rules he has aren't necessarily prescribed by a single creator, but instead are a self-imposed disciplinary practice that runs embedded into his every behaviour. this to me is very alex!! as the media-designated 'personable funny guy on the grid', alex is constantly receiving input from all directions on how he should behave, and in my view has baked into his being the need to be highly functional, agreeable, yet disciplined in every regard. if he intentionally transgresses upon this model, it fundamentally shifts who he is (largely by reshaping how people perceive him). also, the idea of willingly breaking one's self to surpass their limits, while equally applicable to many other drivers, really resonates with alex's story to me given how much he's been through and sacrificed.

the final meme in the original post, where representatives of fae, angel, and machine come together in a meeting of the minds to discuss what the fuck god's problem is. that's what they're talking about in the driver debriefs. among other things, like the shanghai good boy collar and when in your career is too early to get a full-back tattoo.

[det2x-fanfic-dump]

HEADCANON: DEMON BROTHERS AS ANGELS (MAMMON)

Lucifer | Mammon | Leviathan | Asmodeus | Beelzebub | Belphegore | Lilith/Satan

This is a reference for my fanfic series. Obey Me kinda gives a vague lore or maybe I just forgot and didn't read it properly. But here's my headcanons and takes on what I imagined the brothers' lives are as angels.

You can also see this as my character analysis lol

Disclaimer: This is inspired from the game and my basic understanding in Theology. I am no expert in Theology and I may be religiously-biased writing this.

WHEN HE WAS AN ANGEL:

Mammon is a giver as an angel, giving emotional and physical support. If MC is out of their therapy duties, he's most likely the subsitute lol

WEAPON OF CHOICE: He is skilled with a SWORD.

Headcanon: Being under Michael's tutelage once, he is introduced in training with a sword. However, as a demon, he sees no use of it since he rely more on magic and deceptions now.

POWER AND ABILITY:

1. Teleportation:

The ability to teleport everywhere between celestial realm and human world. This ability is contrast to Mammon's demon power to summon crows and super speed.

Explanation: Crows are everywhere and super speed is technically teleportation but running.

2. Swordfighting / Protection

He used swords to protect humans from evil spirits. This ability contrasts to Mammon's demon powers to having physical strength in general.

Explanation: He no use swords as demon

3. Protection/ Attraction

The ability to get one's attention, encouragement and unconditional protection. Singing and playing an instrument is the medium. This ability is contrast to Mammon's demon power of giving wealthy luck

Explanation: Giving luck is mostly a granted wish or reward. There's a price to pay. Unconditional protection needs no trade.

RANK AS ANGELS: Stated in Obey Me Wiki, Mammon was an ARCHANGEL.

1. As an archangel, Mammon often went down to the human world to bring the good news to humans and saves them from danger if necessary.

2. He's one of those angels that whispers in your ear guiding you to the right path.

3. He always play with little kids who sees him.

4. Mammon's stories about his job in the human world is what lead to Lilith and Belphie's love and curiosity for humans .

5. Despite being a messenger of god, he still does what normal angels do and that's to interact with random people.

6. The hifher angels finds this a waste of time but lets him cuz he still does his job.

7. Probably the reason why Michael gives Mammon to Luci instead.

RANK: After promoted by Lucifer as a THRONE...'

1. As a Throne, he sings to Father God, bringing peace of minds to humans and angels.

2. He follows Lucifer everywhere he goes like a duckling.

3. He always announces Lucifer's arrival to everyone wherever he goes. Kinda annoying to Lucifer but didn't mind.

4 He is good at playing wind instruments. specifically trumpets.

5. He is a babysitter for human souls residing in the Celestial Realm.

HOW BEING AN ANGEL AFFECTS HIM AS A DEMON:

1. Mammon is cursed by Greed and being very materialistic. This contrast of him being a giver.

2. Mammon still find himself doing things when he was an angel by:

Mammon's overprotectiveness towards his brothers and MC is similar to him guiding humans to what's right.

His carefree attitude and being idiot is his own interpretation of bringing peace of mind to others in a way...IT'S 50-50

3. He still gives life advices to everyone. Even though he has poor use of right words and analogies.

Source of Inspiration/ Origin:

Source: Angeology Wiki / Christian Religion

What is Thrones:

My interpretation: Thrones is the third highest rank of angels. As carriers of the Throne, I imagined these angels to be the ones who announces to the angels that Father God or the other higher ranked angels are coming.

Thrones is one of the ranks that serves Father God directly so assumig they mostly never leave heaven. Since they're the last that belongs to the top hierarchy, they're in charge of taking care of the human souls.

My interpretation: Since Mammon is a pretty ikemen boy, we shall ignore the depicted of old man lol. However, old man is wise hence Mammon can be qualified in giving life advices and stories. If we use this facts to fiction, The so called wheels can be interpreted as the ones that steers or the pilots---a somewhat guide to a certain destination. All eyes are on the Thrones, may it be angels or humans. Thrones are guides to God's way.

What is Archangels:

Source: Patch.com

My interpretation: Archangels are angels sent to Earth to protect humans. Michael is known as the great defender and protector, he has a sword and everything. Hence, Mammon being Michael's disciple first creates Mammon's character of overprotectiveness and caring where he is seen to be most caring to MC. (This is probably my headcanon since this is too much positivity for a demon lol)

[sleepyconfusedpotato]

Okay we know you love Ghost but can you see ghosts? 👀

WELL. I can't see ghosts, but I can feel and hear them, if that makes sense. But I'm not afraid nor scared of them, like they just be doing their stuff it's their business, I just don't bother them LMAO.

Here's a list of ghost stories that I've encountered in my life (LET'S GO SPOOKY STORY TIME) :

(disclaimer I swear I'm not lying on any of this. Me and my fam are quite religious yes, and Indonesia is also known for the ghosts and myths, so buckle up)

I can feel a lot of ghosts in different churches. One time I saw one is at night I saw a white figure on top of the church roof. Everything else was dark, but that figure was shining bright. Super bright. Usually ghosts are pitch black figure/shadow figure, but this one is shining bright. Probably an angel idk.

I know there's a spirit that resides in my house (my house is in front of a cemetery). My dog likes to bark at a tree and that's like the telltale. One of the housekeeper that used to work for my mum (that can see ghost) said that the ghost is a kid and not harmful.

I sleep in the second floor, but the first floor is open to see from me and my sister's room. One night around 2-3 AM, me and my sis got woken up by the sound of a crowd. Yeah. A crowd, like in a party from the first floor. Sounds of people conversing and stuff but fr there's literally no one. My mum said the spirits are gathering and just having a party downstairs lol.

In me and my sis' room (the lights were turned off), I saw a 'grey' woman dressed in a mukena (Muslim women's praying garment. Usually white in color) doing her prayer literally ON our bed. I couldn't see the face, but she had glowing eyes. We still sleep on that exact bed to this day HAH (Girl that's MY bed. Go get a sajjada or smth).

We have hollow metal fences, so if you hit it, it would sound like a baseball bat, if you get what I'm saying. Some nights at 2 AM I would hear someone hitting our metal fence super hard that I can't sleep. Me and my dad are very sensitive to sounds. Any sound at all and we BOTH would wake up. But my dad apparently CANNOT hear this person hitting the fence and didn't wake up. So I assume I might be the only one to hear it. Probably the kid ghost that I mentioned above.

This is quite scary, and I sincerely am afraid of and HATE this trait of mine. Whenever I can't sleep until 3 AM, (I easily fall asleep. I'm very tired during the day, and I always sleep easy. I don't have insomnia), whenever that happens, someone I know/in my family dies. The most recent ones are on January 4th 2022 (My uncle) and on November 22nd 2022 (my grandmother). I fucking hate this trait cuz I fear it could be my parents or siblings. But yea, gotta live with that.

There're many more ghost stories in museums, churches, and stuff. Fortunately in my hostel there's no activity at all so I can relax and shit.

[angelici-scriptis]

Incarnate Angels

Disclaimer: I'm constantly in the process of learning. Some stuff is my personal views. I may also get things wrong or misinterpreted. Let me know if I fuck up. Proceed with caution, thanks.

What are Incarnate Angels?

Incarnate angel is a descriptive phrase for souls that are angel in origin living in a human body from birth.

What are angelkin?

Angelkin is a sub-category of otherkin. It is used to describe people who identify as an angel. It encompasses a wider variety of experiences that aren't necessarily spiritual based (psychological, ficitional, etc.).

Do you have to be a part of a particular religion to be an angel/interact with them?

Nope. You can do whatever you want, believe whatever you want, worship whomever you want, such is the glory of free will. You may feel more predisposed towards a religion, world-view, or lack thereof which can be influenced your soul, but honestly follow your heart.

Angels also generally don't care what background you come from, just be aware of religious appropriation when it comes to angel-related information online.

Do angels incarnate because they are Fallen (cast out)?

No, but Fallen angels can incarnate too, so sometimes.

Why do angels incarnate?

Variety of reasons. It can be summed up to about three VERY GENERAL reasons as far as I'm aware, and each one can be a lot more detailed than the following very general descriptions. Possible reasons are: 1) To help, 2) To live, and 3) To learn. For example, I'm mainly here to just experience what it is to be human.

How do you discover if you're an incarnate angel?

The specifics defer from person to person. Some learn/remember very quickly, many others spend years going back and forth. Generally, a lot of introspection is required because ultimately it's you and only you that can say who you are.

There is no requirement/expectation for what an incarnate angel looks like, behaves like, thinks like, etc. either.

It's best to approach it the same as other questioning otherkin. Otherkin.net and BeyondHumanity have a good FAQ/how-to.

Technically, you can search up stuff online specifically about incarnate angels, but I am very serious when I say the New Age movement (which is where you'll find 99.999% of this information) is heavily drenched in white supremacy. Remember Garfield, you are not immune to propaganda.

I highly recommend creature-wizard's blog for information about the New Age movement.

[let-the-living-beware]

Some Diabolik Lovers terms explained

Haru note: So when I first really got into Diabolik Lovers, I immediatly got introduced to a bunch of terms that weren't in the anime. From the other races to phrases like Pandemonium and I wondered if they're just made up words but after reading into Paradise Lost I was presented with a term that wasn't made up and so I tried to find some "meaning" for the other ones. Have fun!

Disclaimer: This is purely my understanding and research. I am also not part of any of the mentioned religions and don't intend any harm, I am just reciting what I find. If I said anything that is wrong please ask/dm me or just comment and I will edit it to be more accurate.

Specific buildings

Eden (Castle) - So first of we got the most obvious thing. This is a reference to the Garden of Eden in wich Adam and Eve lived before Eve ate from the Tree of Knowledge and everything went downhill.

Banmaden/Pandemonium - I couldn't actually find anything refering to the term 'Banmaden' (万魔殿) that hasn't anything to do with Diabolik Lovers and in an last effort I tried using google translate (I know, very reliable so dont quote me on the next part). After putting it in, and after I only got 'Manmaden' back, it also said that it was chinese. Chinese than seemed to be more accurate with 'Hall of All Devils' but like I said don't quote me on that.

Now to 'Pandemonium' and this is definetly easier. First of I got a game but I doubt that is what they were refering to. They probably refered to the capital of hell in the epic Paradise Lost from the poet John Milton. The book describes it as hosting all evil and that it was build by the fallen angels.

Places/Diseases

Rotigenberg - I first translated it to 'rotten mountain' as berg in german means mountain but after checking the spelling of 'Rotig' it doesnt seem that plausable anymore. Still this is the best I could do since my Japanese isn't really good (in fact it is really bad) and I couldnt find anything outside Diabolik lovers since, when looking up the japanese spelling 'ローティゲンベルク' I could only find Japanese websites selling Diabolik Lovers stuff and a Bavarian village.

Endzeit - Here I was to 80% sure that it originates from the german language and originally translated it to 'Endtime' (or End of time but that wouldn't be the literal translation as it isn't written 'Ende der Zeit'). But I wasn't happy with just that and after looking it up I also found out that it is a religious concept that describes the time before the end of the world. What it specifically is, is different depending if you are a Christian or Jewish.

In the jewish perception, Endzeit will begin with the arrival of the messiah and can only be prevented by humans having equity and peace.

After the new testament in the bible Endzeit comes before the second coming of christ and the last judgement.

I don't know how this relates to Endzeit in Diabolik Lovers besides maybe as a metaphor? But I don't wanna go into the theory stuff in this post.

Extra

Kino - You probably ask yourself why I would have a name in this. Well, simply because I find it funny and you will now find out why.

So when I first read his name I thought they were kidding or it really was a name in japan and it is but not how that little motherfucker gets written. Our Kino it written キノ wich is just his name with the Katakana alphabet (キ= 'ki' ; ノ= 'no') but the japanese name Kino gets written like this 木野 with the, I am not quite sure, Kanji aplhabet (木= 'tree, wood' ; 野= 'plains, field, rustic, civilian life')

But that doesn't justify why I find it funny and that is how we get back to German because Kino is just the german word for cinema.

[rishiimaa]

HII EVERYONE! This isn’t a fanfic between canon characters, this is mainly just my Oc’s that I have, I just wanted to show ya’ll this cause I really liked how it turned out, and this could also be a filler!

This oc fanfic contains: Angst no comfort 😞

This is gay by the way, if you’re you know scared of the gays. (lol)

Disclaimer: Cursing and sad 😕

WARNING!! THERE ARE MENTIONS OF RELIGIOUS BELIEFS BUT IT DON’T SPECIFY

—————————————————————

Cold, drenched, and paralyzed, Seiya felt as though every part of him was at the brink of shattering. His heart pounded like a relentless drum, his eyes stung from the strain of not blinking, his lips pressed together in a thin line, and his shoulders were rigid with tension.

What could he possibly say? That it wasn’t true? Angels were bound by their truth, or so he believed—deceit was anathema to their existence.

“Don’t bullshit me, Seiya. Say something,” Sol demanded, his voice devoid of the usual emotion. It was as if a veil had been lifted, revealing a stranger where once had been a familiar face.

“I—I… At first, it was true, but now—”

“So all of this was just a fucking lie?” Sol’s voice trembled, betraying the depth of his pain. It was a sound Seiya had never heard from him before—a heartbreaking crack that hinted at tears he was trying to hold back.

“That confession, the kisses… you telling me you love me—was it all just to trap my soul?” Sol’s eyes locked onto Seiya’s, but Seiya couldn’t meet them.

“No—! No, I would never do that. I do love you, more than anything! I would never commit such a sin just to be with someone!”

“Oh, so now it’s a sin?” Sol’s voice was sharp with disbelief. “Is that all you care about—your own salvation? Love is supposed to be more important than some divine rule, but it seems like you’ve always cared more about what’s right in the eyes of God than the people you love!”

Seiya took a shaky breath, trying to steady his fear and regret.

“Yes, I see now that I was wrong. I’m sorry! But I’ve changed, and my perspective has evolved—”

Sol ripped the glowing amulet from around his neck and hurled it onto the sidewalk. His face contorted with raw, furious sadness, water mingling with tears that streamed down his cheeks.

“You can forget about any compromise… and us. Don’t ever come near me again.”

Seiya stood frozen, his legs seemingly rooted to the ground. He wanted to run after Sol, to beg for another chance, to explain how deeply sorry he was. But his body betrayed him, and he could only stand there, hollow-eyed and defeated.

What could he do? Chase after him and plead for forgiveness? It felt futile.

It was perhaps better to let Sol go.

Seiya picked up the amulet, his fingers tracing its cracked surface with a heavy heart. His voice, barely a whisper, was laden with sorrow.

“I hope you find happiness, Lilith,” Seiya murmured, his gaze lingering on the shattered amulet.

Lilith emerged from the shadows, her expression one of twisted amusement. “Pathetic, really. Humans are so weak. And you, even more so.”

“It’s infuriating that he believed your lies so easily,” Seiya said, his voice darkening as he glared at Lilith.

“Don’t speak of Sol that way. He has every right to be hurt,” Seiya said, anger flaring in his eyes.

“I lied. Lies break trust, and trust is fragile. I am to blame for this.” Seiya’s eyes met Lilith’s, revealing a depth of regret that seemed to sadden her even more.

“So, you’re just going to give up? Is this how a cherubim behaves? You’re dishonoring everything you claim to stand for—”

“This isn’t about God, Lilith. It’s about Sol and his happiness. And sadly, I’m not the one who can bring him that.”

Seiya unfolded his wings, turning his back to Lilith with a steely glare. “I hope you got what you wanted.”

Lilith staggered back, her shock palpable. This was not the outcome she had desired. She had expected Seiya to become enraged, to unravel in madness, proving himself a demon.

But this… this was the exact opposite. Her brother was acting as though his entire world had crumbled, and he seemed willing to let it go.

“Damn it… This is affecting me now,” Lilith said, her voice a rough whisper. Her own dark wings unfurled as she prepared to leave.

“I need to fix this before it truly starts to destroy me.”

________________________________________

HEEY WHOEVER READS THIS I HOPE YOU LIKE IT <3

[normal-abbey]

Demonic ages in Lazarus

PSA this is taken from my fanfic notes: I have an HC (that i took great liberty with, and that is based specifically off of a in-game scene where Lucifer complains/makes mention of being "in his millions" or "over ten million years old"-I don't entirely remember the phrasing) that He (going based off of both traditional religious and Media-based lore) is/was not only the second oldest of the archangels, but is also one of the older beings down in the devildom.  And that Barb is still, like, considerably older. I, personally, hc that Lucifer is around 500 million or so, with Simeon not an inconsiderable measure behind him at maybe 95 mil, and Diavolo at around 50Mil. I'm basing this lowkey off of prehistoric periods, utilizing both the "creation" theory and evolution because of the supernatural elements of OM. In my HC, the Devildom, earth, and heaven have been around for similar periods of time, and the concept of angels are slightly (several million years) older than the first living creatures on earth. This makes the first of the archangels specifically SOME of the first "created beings" within my personal lore, having been created several billion years after God decided he wanted company. I know these ages seem a bit absurd, but I'm lowkey edging toward a slightly eldritch vibe with angels/demons, and this helps with that. If it's too goofy/incomprehensible to you, feel free to picture them as silly lil' guys who are only, like, really old vampire levels of old, though it will be harder to ignore as chapters march onward in the fic. As for the content of my hc, this is what I imagined (Disclaimer: this is fiction, and only loosely based on religious lore, so this is not theologically accurate): firstly, Michael is the oldest of the "warrior class" of angels, and the oldest archangel. But, in Lazarus lore, God had three angels that he originally created that were made solely to worship/serve him--created to sit at his feet and sing songs in adoration. They're based off of the Biblical principals of "faith, hope, and love." I also HC they were the first to fall, and that God created his warrior (Michael) to cast them out, before creating Michael's brothers. Those three are the original demons in my fic, one of which is Dia's great (x10) grandfather. I may do a side fic in this series about it at some point. I'm debating calling them either The Three, or The Three Virtues. Anyway, the first four Archangels are younger, though not much by supernatural/heavenly standards. But the archangels were created as warriors to guard heaven and earth from the fallen, and eventually bring messages of warning and/or comfort to humanity. The original archangels ages are as follows (and these are not exact because I am not writing that many numbers down while being this tired): Michael: 1Bil, oldest. Lucifer: 500Mil, 2nd oldest archangel specifically. Raphael (yes that one): 250Mil, 2nd youngest. Gabriel: 100Mil, youngest. Barbatos is (considerably) older than Lucifer....So yeah. Just keep that in mind. Side note: Lucifer was loyal for an incredibly long time, which is what made his fall so devastating. He fell, as is canon in OM (though exact dates weren’t given), sometime after humanity gained life/sentience. Think of it like a combo of creation and evolution: Their “Father” created the world and life, but it evolved as IRL science has determined. 

[fighterpilotdragon02]

Spoilers for Midnight Mass (2021)

Right, so I'm super tired and I'll probably add on to this later but here's something I thought of that I haven't heard anyone else talk about.

TW: (Forced) miscarriage, abortion, implications of forced sterilization, religious abuse

A disclaimer before I write anything: I grew up fundamentalist/evangelical Protestant Christian (actually I grew up in a cult but that's another story). I am a queer agnostic and I DO NOT AGREE with the pro-life movement and honestly most stuff major churches do. This is just my observation in the framework of the faith.

It is so telling that the being which Monsignor Pruitt called an angel and promoted to his church causes a miscarriage. Most Christianity I've been exposed to is against abortion (some is even against birth control) and at least pays lip service to celebrating life. So when Pruitt betrays the trust of his congregation and alters their bodies without consent, when Erin's baby disappeared, that should have been a glowing neon sign for him and Bev that Shit Was Not Right.

I don't recall any indication that people aside from Erin, Riley, and Dr. Gunning knew about the lost baby, but my point is this:

The "angel" and Pruitt's dishonesty ("Forgive me, Father, for I am going to sin") are both perversions of what Christianity is theoretically about. Christianity, as I learned it, is about love and community and celebrating life as a gift from God. The angel directly forced a miscarriage upon an unknowing and unconsenting Erin (and how interesting, that pregnancy would be impossible under these conditions, that the population would eventually die out no matter the outcome of the show). Pruitt, while likely unaware of this outcome, was a direct arbitrator of this. His twisted love and fear, his obsession with staying young--something which is directly addressed as happening in the good afterlife (as I learned it)--took everything from him and his innocent congregation.

Anyway, feel free to add any insight; I'll probably reblog this with non-midnight (hah!) additions later. Let me know, also, if there are any tw tags I should add.