#dont do drugs kids. do salt.

[polteergeistt]

Me and the homies didn't wash out the salt from our hands. We snorted it.

[whichcouldmeannothing]

big big marvey fic rec list

marvey is currently my most bookmarked ship, so trust me when i say i've been around the bend for marvey content. i have dug through a lot of it the past few months, so trust that these fics have been highly rated!

fics are loosely grouped, with the summary and my thoughts under the cut :3 no spoilers ofc bc i love you

MY PERSONAL FAVOURITES

A Specter-Ross Affair by @frivoloussuits (15k+, au)

“You ordered an ‘extra-hot, extra-wet cappuccino, single-origin, properly layered, to-go and ready five minutes ago to make up for your service speed or lack thereof.’” In which Mike is a barista, Rachel is a lawyer, and Harvey is paid excessive amounts of money to plan their joyous Christmas wedding.

"Love is just a particularly socially accepted form of fraud. It's a series of increasingly complex and fragile deceptions between two or more people, and, more alarmingly, between each participant and their own deluded subconscious."

i literally cannot recommend this fic enough. this might be my favourite read of the entire year, dead serious. this sounds fluffy but trust me, the pining and the angst go well like salt on a chocolate chip cookie: extremely decadent. everything about this fic goes insane and this should be your gateway drug into marvey, im so serious about this. READ IT. (weddingplanner!harvey)

of all the gin joints by @frivoloussuits (10k+, au)

Hanging around a neighborhood bar one night, Harvey befriends a guy named Mike after realizing they can both quote The Princess Bride on demand. In the law offices of Rand, Kaldor, Zane and Pearson, senior partner Harvey Specter takes on an unusual case, representing his managing partner's daughter as she divorces a Michael James Ross. Harvey sees no connection until it's far too late.

"They’re playing a virtuosic duet with inhuman ease, as if the intoxication has broken their boundaries and blurred them into a single entity."

this. obsessed with fics that really use the law in their plots, and this is a prime example. a lot of chemistry in this one that is described in a way that makes you jealous of the bond they share and there are still lines in this fic that i think about almost everyday but honestly, such a top-tier read. PLEASE PLEASE IF YOU LIKE SUFFERING ANF REALLY REALLY GOOD CHEMISTRY PLEASE

5U175 by Closer (26k, canon-adjacent)

Harvey sometimes moonlights as a Star Trek BNF. Mike might have an attitude problem on the internet. TiberiusGhost is strangely compelling, for a recluse who never goes to meetups, and Harvey's finding this kid Photohead vaguely familiar…

i know that the terminology in this one is hella old-school but trust me. as someone who doesnt read a lot of fandom fics, this fic has changed it all for me (also bc the author replied to my comment hehehe) stick with this fic because the way fandom weaves with the character development is absolutely delicious, i remember saying this in my og comment but this fic was written with love for fandom and you should definitely read it too!!! you'd absolutely love it! (also ben stans rise up ^^)

fics to sink your teeth into (20k+)

needs must by @melthemagpie (98k+, au)

When Grammy needs an upgrade in care, Mike knows that the usual one-off gig as a paid submissive won't be enough. He takes a job he's been refusing for a while - a long-term, full-time contract. He expects his client to be a sadistic asshole. He expects not to like it. He's wrong on both counts.

this is a fandom classic, every fic rec has this on the list (cw for dom/sub and prostitution, so if you're uncomfy please dont read) but i swear there are so many romantic moments in this one that make me swoon and the smut is very good, i usually tap out in long fics really quickly but this hooked me the whole way through twice. thats my ringing endorsement, READ THIS

Lobster and Other Catastrophes by @andthetardis (21k, canon-compliant)

After months of silence, Mike starts texting Harvey again out of the blue. Funny thing to do on his honeymoon, really.

BRO PLEASE. this was so good. angsty and pining-y enough even though it's mostly a text fic. text fics to me are more like comedic, but this one had substance and heart (and funny and enjoyable btw). pulls you in and really makes you want to stick it out and get to the beautiful ending <333 (harvey being soft is probably a category on its own :3)

The Game by @frivoloussuits (27k, hunger games au)

Harvey Specter and Donna Paulsen are efficient and elegant killers. They have trained since childhood, mentored personally by Jessica Pearson and marked for years as District 1's Tributes for the Hunger Games. Mike Ross is an orphan from District 12, a drug dealer, and an underage gambler. After years of scrutinizing the Hunger Games on TV to make savvy bets, he finds himself on the wrong side of the camera, now playing the odds just to survive. Harvey and Mike cannot, should not trust each other. Still, they strike a backroom deal.

"Because he’s clever and quick-thinking and he’s learned her main lesson well– don’t love anyone you wouldn’t be willing to see dead. Ideally, don’t love anyone at all."

I READ THIS WHEN I WAS REVISITING HUNGER GAMES AND OHHHHH THIS HAS THE ANGST. absolutely riveting. ths is the third fic im reccing from them bc i love frivoloussuits. i would die for them HHFSHFHKSDGDHFG i love the angst and the life-threatening situations that the hunger games provide and harvey as a career is correct. its just correct. everything here grips my soul

Disaster Stories by agatestones (22k, canon-compliant)

"Hold on," Mike asked, "you made Donna come into work in the middle of a blizzard?" "I don't make Donna do anything. Haven't you learned by now?" Harvey gave Mike a mean little smile, but under that was relief for anyone to see. "You, I can make come into the office in a blizzard."

reads like a novella to me, and it's really good!!! very episodic and you really feel like these are things that have happened in universe. its very slice of lifey and i reread it a lot as a comfort read, its like a big hug to me

Pizza and a Movie by Closer (30k+, au)

In an alternate universe, Harvey's still a lawyer but Mike's not a pot runner -- he's a deliveryman for Rollo's Pizza and Ribs, which happens to be Harvey's favorite pizza place. Once Harvey finds out his pizza guy is a genius, Mike's life takes a few turns he would not have expected...

i swear this is the most rom-commy fic marvey has to offer. i like aus that slap me in the face more with the alternate universe, but this is such a rom-com plot. fandom classic as well and it really reads like a hugh grant 90s movie and if thats not enough to pull you in idk what will tbh

Imprimatur by Closer (22k, au)

Mike was raised to believe Imprint was a life-changing event for those few lucky enough to experience it. Harvey was raised to believe it was a form of mental illness. When it actually happened, neither of them noticed.

this goes absolutely crazy. one of those fics where you read it and you almost want to throw your phone at the wall because the characters could make it so easy if they werent so stupid (but in a good way of course) but the way it was written, you feel the depth of the soulmate bond and why its so important (which a lot of soulmate aus forget to do loll) but goes down like an expensive and delicious dinner :)

afternoon reads (10k+)

Sony SRF-39FP by @frivoloussuits (11k+, canon-adjacent)

Anita Gibbs won’t settle for Mike, not when there are name partners within her reach. She offers only one deal– two years, no other charges against anyone else in the firm, as long as Harvey Specter turns himself in. And even as Donna and Jessica and Louis and Mike beg him not to, he jumps on the grenade. “Time to get busy living or get busy dying,” he remarks, and Mike gives a small chuckle. Then Harvey smirks, straightens his suit jacket, and strides into FCI Danbury.

“I can’t believe they’re trying to lock you in a box and forget about you,” Mike sighs as he leaves.

“Well, as long as you don’t forget me, I figure I’ll survive.”

“Maybe you haven’t noticed, but forgetting’s never been my strong suit.

cw for depersonalization and desc of solitary confinement, very very heavy but the way mike is there throughout everything makes my heart twinge. i really dont know how to describe this fic at all but its really good. it makes me cry a lot. also made me start listening to jazz which- uh

Here at the end of all things by @tattooedsiren (10k, au)

When he arrives at the Pearson Hardman building the lights are dimmed and the floor is deserted. His feet carry him to Harvey's office even though he expects it to be empty. Because Harvey probably fled the city via helicopter or teleporter or sheer force of will. But when he approaches the office he can see that Harvey is there. He has moved the couch so that it now faces the floor to ceiling windows and Mike silently sits beside Harvey, joins him in looking down at the chaos engulfing the city below. [Apocalypse AU]

I LOVE APOCALYPSE FICS UP UP UP badass!harvey makes me bark, but im a really big fan of people who find happiness in the worst circumstances and this fic does it so so so well. reminds me a lot of tlou episode like 2? the one with the strawberries. please this is what i revisit when i miss marvey and i dont have a lot of time because the world and the characters are jsut so delicious!!!

quick reads (1k+)

This Love is Silent by kim47 (8k, canon-compliant)

She should have known. She had known, that something was off, at least. She knew he was hiding something. She just never imagined it could be this. Despite Harvey's warnings, Mike tells Rachel the truth about everything. She's shocked, naturally, and more than a little angry, but she agrees to keep his secret, and even to date him. So when they break up, Harvey goes into damage-control mode.

RACHEL!! HELLO RACHEL!! im always up for smart and discerning rachel (this shows up in of all the gin joints too btw!!!) this runs realistic to me because it shows that rachelxmike arent some hopelessly wrong for each other couple, they have good and bad times. this feels more real to me than other fics bc its not like the world conspires for marvey to be apart, its just life. i know this makes it sound so sad, and it is, but trust me: this is really really really good i love this so much

an archive of harvey specter's expressions by @frivoloussuits (2k, canon-compliant)

Five old expressions that Mike rediscovers in new contexts once he and Harvey are (finally) together, and one that he sees for the first time. Alternatively titled “An Ode to Gabriel Macht’s Face.”

this was written for me. this is literally me. writing fic because gabriel macht is too pretty, like this fic is literally for me. a lot of peering at him to get this fic as masterfully written as it is, and i thank you author everyday for it. to me, this reads like it's been written with love and care and true adoration (Truly, like Mike)

Coffee-Cart Client Privilege by @frivoloussuits (7k, au)

Mike runs a coffee cart. The coffee cart.

"Why not? They're too big and dense to be a snack." So are you, Mike thinks, and yet.

IM SORRY I KEEP RECCING FRIVOLOUS SUITS THEYRE MY FAVOURITE WRITER IN THIS FANDOM HFBKABFDKHFBHKDSA this has the hand-wavy logic the show has itself but mike's internal monologue in this one is one of the best ive ever read and the way mike's integrated in the offices is just so well-done ahhhh

Objection by yeah its frivoloussuits again i feel bad tagging them like 7 times (2k, canon-adjacent)

When Mike announces he’s leaving, Harvey plans to hide the jagged pieces of his broken heart deep inside, where no one will ever find them. His heart would like to object.

BIGG fan of physical hurt/comfort!!!! also big fan of people absolutely freaking out in the hospital in fics, it makes me bounce of the wall!! very short but the angst and love really hits you quick and leaves you on the floor gasping for air. very good (also cant prove this but im very sure this is a scrubs reference.t hanks)

Excerpts From The Gospel of Harvey Specter, edited by Michael "Forever Awesome" Ross, 2011, 1st Ed, by @rcmclachlan (7k, canon compliant)

Mike can totally read people. Well, most people. Some people. Or maybe just Harvey, who's pretty much an open book.

this one's really funny! it doesent follow direct prose and instead plays a lot with the setting its in (where mike's a documenter of harvey) and its just so funny and adorable. has a lot of heart too, it isn't just crack or anything but you really feel everything mike does as he writes all this, read this!!1

One More Sleepless Night by @sal_si_puedes (9k, au)

Soul Bonds are one-sided – there’s usually mutual affection, but only one party feels the crippling need to be together as often as possible. If separated at length from their love, that party becomes crushed by longing, panic, and sheer hopelessness, and so it is illegal to forcibly keep Soulmates apart. Some days, Harvey Specter hates the Bond that skews his judgement and weakens his resolve, and he fears what would happen if anyone in his world ever discovers he is so compromised. He certainly never planned to disclose the Bond for the first time in the middle of Anita Gibbs’ office, in a last-ditch attempt to invalidate the deal sending Mike to prison.

HSDGFHSDKGHRLKGHK THIS FIC. i love fics that use more than just prose to tell their stories (see above fic) and this does my favourite thing that soulmate aus do, which is where they integrate in-universe explanations for the phenomenon. the amount of work and dedication put into this fic makes it absolutely sing and was absolutely lovely!!

also pspspsps

golden like the daffodils by @mini-mart (2k, canon-compliant)

Poetry holds meaning, for anyone who reads it. It obscures and dances around the literal and metaphorical, because it’s imbued with so much of something that it overflows out of any definition. It can make someone mad, or lovesick, or aroused, and the reactions would be absolutely warranted. Mike is poetry, to Harvey. - Harvey Specter could be a good politician, as he believes in pragmatism over poetry. He won't let his progress fall apart, won't let someone knock it down. And then someone unceremoniously cracks open a suitcase at his feet. Or: Harvey, pretty boys and poetry.

yeah yeah i wrote this yeah yeah self promo smth smth

there's a lot more that isn't here but i'll probably write a new one when i go for a deep dive through the ship tags again :3

^^ ao3 etiqutte applies! if you like the fic, kudos and comment and bookmark!! show your love! happy reading marveys! my gift to u :3

[gloomygloworm]

why is no one talking about modern edwin and crystal being besties because they have the same shitty hobbies? crystal exhibits rich kid mannerisms obviously yes but also abandoned kid mannerisms through shoplifting and stuff, i wanna see burnout edwin smoking a cigarette smart enough to pass his classes easily but failing every single one of them, doped out on drugs at house parties (ur friends only like you when ur "fun" and "dumb" like them) i wanna see a slightly jaded edwin that keeps his niche hobbies under wraps (collecting special and rare editions of books, taxidermy, thrifting/collecting antiques, aquariums??? maybe???) approached by smiley cheery charles (maybe they get tossed in the same tutoring program?) who slowly finds the will to live again cause charles is the sun breaking the storm clouds.

i want niko wedging herself between crystal's ribs. crystal who gets egged on by edwin because they're both tired and jaded. i want to see her drinking too much at parties and being cruel because shes made of broken glass. i want niko's sweetness to piece her back together slowly, gently collecting the shards of crystals actual personality (fierce, and loyal, and oh so GOOD) i want niko to make crystal feel warm and fuzzy and like she wants to TRY again.

everyones always talking about how edwin wouldnt really change if he was born closer to crystals years or whatever but i think thats wrong. i think the way the world has developed socially would make radical changes to the way he acts, to the way he thinks. i want modern exploration of how people think edwin would evolve - how his sexuality expands, the way he dresses. because i think he indulges. i think he dresses for fun at parties, a little more revealing a little more form fitting. i think he has dark circles under his eyes, that he showers every single day, that his hair is a mess. i think hes sassy and rude and bitchier than he should be because theres no one to dilute his salt laden personality until charles and niko show up.

i also need him to be ill. chronically. i need exhaustion to settle in his joints, for his paranoia to make him twitchy and unpleasant to talk to. i need him to grit his teeth and be on edge because i think he comes from a rich but large family and i think the dynamics there can be very backstabby.

really what i want is a fcking - 5 + 1 the 5 times charles panics and hides his cigarette cause edwin thinks he's quit and can't see him weak and the 1 time he catches edwin smoking on the roof and he just goes "yeah i dont like the smoke in the house or how crowded it gets here so i just do it when no one else is awake"

i also need edwin and charles fwb because edwin doesnt know how to be friends and the emotional exploration of attachment - charles thinks everything is fine theyre besties and having sex nbd but edwin has a panic attack every time charles leaves his room cause what if he just goes away and never comes back

[quodekash]

yeah so im gonna make my silly little commentary posts for we are sometimes but not all the time

he stared at his friend's water and started smiling like a fucking idiot 💀

h2o just makes him giddy like that 🥰

also I genuinely fucking adore Pham and Fang's dynamic, they care about each other so much (I might cry)

I JSUT FUCKING LOVE HIM SO MUCH CAN YOU BLAME ME

im sorry, i cant get over the fact that q fuCKING SANG SOUND’S SONG FROM MSP IN THE THIRD FUCKING EPISODE OF THE SHOW

HES JUST SO SMOL I FUCKING ADORE HIM SO MUCH DUDE

here to pick up his twink

HES JUST SO SMOL THO LIKE CAN YOU BLAME ME???

I JUST WANNA RUFFLE HIS HAIR AND PINCH HIS CHEEKS HES SO FUCKING ADORABLE

i think i just really love satang cos during msp every time sound was on screen i lost my shit and now every time toey is on screen i lose my shit

btw i fully had to rewatch that entire scene, i was entirely focusing on satang’s little adorable fuckin face that i forgot to read and process the dialogue lmao

his expression is like “did you bring me here to do your chores, or are you gonna be honest and just say you want to makeout"

the real answer is just that he wants to spend time with him btu doesnt know how to do that normally 💀

(and also that he wants to make out with him)

WHY IS EVERYONE SO FUCKING SMOL TODAY

HES TINY

HES THIS BIG 🤏

OML IT HAPPENED FOR LESS THAN HALF A SECOND BUT I PAUSED IT AT THE EXACT PERFECT MOMENT

I genuinely adore accidental kiss tropes in bls, its just so unrealistic its fucking amazing

[insert image of phum's friends walking in here (I had to delete some of my screenshots because I can only do 30 and I dont want to do more than one post for this)]

AND THEN HIS FRIENDS WALK IN, CLASSIC

it's so awkward and I am LIVING for it

people in bls always walk in at the WORST possible moments and its AMAZING

THIS WHOLE SITUATION IS SO RIDICULOUSLY FUNNY TO ME

phuwin’s character trying to cook is so me

and also my sister, one time she was making spaghetti bolognese for us for dinner and she put way too much salt, and then to attempt to solve the problem, she put water into the pan to "evaporate the salt" 💀

the best part is I didnt even realise why that wouldnt work until my brother started laughing

anyway, back to the ep

WHAT DRUGS ARE IN THIS EPISODE TO MAKE EVERY SINGLE FUCKING CHARACTER SO BABYGIRL

THEYRE ALL SO SMOL AND ADORABLE AND BBG WHAT IS GOING ON

HES SO TINY

Youre fucking KIDDING

IM SO SUDDENLY INVESTED IN THIS MAIN COUPLE

THAT WAS SUCH A SUDDEN SWITCH BRO

literally last week I was like "yeah okay I like it" and then suddenly im on the verge of tears when they make physical contact???

[insert image of pun eating]

PUN !

MY LITTLE GUY

I ADORE THEMMMMM

oh fuck yes I love this friendship already and it just started

AND CHAIN'S GETTING JEALOUSSSSS FUCK YEAH

they look like tired dads fr

is phuwin just fuckin short or is pond like 3 metres tall cos holy shit

LOOK AT HIM

SMOL BITCHES

EVERYONE'S FUCKING TINY TODAY

woah he really just went for it there

HOLY FUCK HE SAID YES

TAN IS LOSING IT HES SO HAPPY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

great frame

[insert that entire scene with the jump onto him and the holding hands and the FUCKING CHEEK KISS]

HES MY LITTLE FUCKING GUY

HES SO NEURODIVERGENT AND I ADORE HIM

KICKING AND SCREAMING MY FEET RN

he's jealoussssssss

I love pun so much, I truly would die for him

Welcome back to another episode of Toey Thinks Peem And Phum Are Dating (And He’s Right)

Im gonna be completely honest, if pond looked at me like that, id probably do whatever he tells me to without a second thought

thats all im saying

LOOK AT THAT LITTLE FACE

HES SINGING THE FUCKING ABAAB SONG

IM CRYING DUDE THIS IS AMAZING

ARE THEY JUST GONNA SING SONGS FROM OTHER BLS FOR THE QHOLE SERIES? IM FUCKIN DOWN FOR THAT DUDE

this song is so out of winny’s range tho 💀

so fucking SMOL

also chains hand just always naturally rests on pun’s shoulder

literally all the time

what im saying here is I think they should kiss

HE DIDNT JUST GRAB HIS WRIST HERE HE GRABBED HIS HAND ERIJKGBNREJB HOLY SHIT

Cool! 👍

im glad they finally got there

FUCK YES NEXT EPISODE WE'RE GETTING THE SCENE FROM THE PILOT THAT MADE ME LOSE MY SHIT

PUNCHAIN FOREHEAD KISS AND QTOEY CHEEK KISS BITCHES

okay now I just have one final question before I take my leave: what the FUCK was the song playing in the background of the qtoey scene near the end of the episode

it was just electric guitar and I KNOW recognise it but I cant figure out what fucking song it was (literally I finished the episode at like 1:30 but didnt go to sleep til 3 because I was trying to find the song)

so please, if ANYONE recognises it and knows what it is, tell me as soon as you can cos Im fucking dying

update: a moot is pretty sure the song played over other qtoey scenes earlier in the show (the same way msp did with noelm) so now im fuckin PSYCHED for the new song that’s gonna come out eventually

[pedropascal111]

Cross by me (Chapter 1)

Pairing: Top! Joel Miller x Bot! Male Reader

Tags: Angst, Violence, Swearing, Drug references, Slight flirting,

Summary: After the outrbeak caused havoc over the city Y/N is left to his own devices, intell he stumbles apon a mysterious stranger.. One that would change his life forever, Joel Miller.

I wake up disjointed and look towards the clock, which reads 6:00 am,

I grogilly get out of bed, annoyed as if I dont wake up everday at this time as I go by my normal morning routine.

As I'm making a cup of coffee a thought crosses my mind "Will I ever get to talk to someone again..?" This thought presumably has been coming up alot in my mind, as I've been alone for over a year since the outbreak caused havoc throught the world.

I had been seperated from everybody I knew which let me to be on my own in a somehow yet somewhat stable cabin that I now call my home, yet I'd never been a big social person yet I strive for a conversation, some kind of human contact, "I feel like a mother fucking zombie.." I mumble to myself, BANG!, I'm suddenly shot out of my thoughts as a loud bang pierces through my ears leaving my head pounding, as I focus my vision I see a whole group of clickers charging towards my cabin.. "GOD FUCKING DAMMIT!!" I yell.

Running up the worn down stairs as one of them breaks behind me I slam through my bedroom door and I grab my bag with my essentials (My pistol, and knife, along with some sanitary products I found in some abandoned gas station I passed through towards the forest the night after the outrbeak, and some random pieces of clothing).

I hurrily run down the stairs tripping and landing on my face with a thud, I shake my thoughts off while getting up and running towards the door, the raveaging pack of clickers now breaking down my door, I stomp into my boots and blast through the door running towards the forest. " So much for my home" I say sarcastically under my breath...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~The Next Day~

You unwillingy open your eyes taking in the fact that your pearched up agaisnt a tree deep in a forest "Where am I?" you mumble, as the occurance of the day before presets itself, Realising you have no where to stay.. All of a sudden .Snap. You hear a slight crack of a branch as you quickly whip you head in the direction of the noise before 2 hands come across you back and slam themselfs over your mouth, your yells being silenced as you slowly lose conciousnous, the moment before your vision goes black "Stupid kid.." you hear from the voice of the mysterious figure behind you before you lose your fight with conciousnous...

'WAKE UP!" A voice beams into your ears as your shaken out of your slumber, as you sleepily open your eyes taking in your surroundings....

"where am I.." You grogilly respond to the figure

Once you eyes finally focus you see the figure that looms over you, Damn hes big, you quickly take in his features big black boots, demin jeans and A green and black plade jacket, before you find yourself looking over his face... a salt and peppery stumble covering his face and a thick brown mustache covering a little bit of his top lip, then his dark brown eyes...

"Hey, kid Can you hear me?" A deep voice shakes me out of my trance

You instantly become fulstered realising youve been staring at him for a little to long for comfort, " y-yes, I can" I respond

"What the fuck were you doing laying down in a middle of a forest, You stupid or something" He says,

slightly taken aback with a look of somewhat offence, "Im not stupid!, I passed out" I say slightly annoyed.

He gives me a look of dissapointment, " So you are stupid." He adds

"Who the fuck are you" I ask annoyed at the pointless banter

" I ask the questions, around here kid" He says sternly

"Fine, asshole' I mumble under my breath, which causes him to squint at me, "The names Y/N " I respond plainly

"Joel" He response

"SCREECH!!" we hear of in the distance, we both whip our heads in the direction of the noise,

"What the fuck is that" I say concerned expression written all over my face even though I want to come off as brave infront of.. Joel

he reads right through my expression giving me a knowing look befor- "RUNNN!!" He yells at me.

"Dont tell me what to do old man" I sneer before I turn on my heels as I sprint in the other direction,

"AHH" I screech as I face plant after tripping on a fucking big ass tree root, a second before I'm thrown over a pair of broad shoulders I yelp

"PUT ME DOWN!" I scream at Joel, flailing my arms which just makes me look like a kid fighting his psrents to get candy as they drag them through a super market

"STOP FUCKING S'MOVING KID" Joel yells in a southern accent

"I TOLD YOU TO NOT TELL ME WHAT TO DO" I yell back in response

" S'THERE ATTRACTED TO NOISE DUMB ASS" He says as I look in the direction of the noise as I see the bloater charging full throttle at us,

"RUN' I demand at Joel

He grunts in response and starts running out of the forest where we find a nearby torn apart house that we decide to look for rescources in, as he continues to attack at my horrible survival instincts

" Stop being a bitch.." I mumble under my breath

"The bitch that saved you" He responds trying to prove his point

"Yeah yeah, old man" I grumble annoyed written all over my face and body language,

He smirks seemingly knowing he won the fight

I blush, something about him is, different about him then anyone I've met before.

"Cough cough" Joel grumbles

I instantly turn on my heels to look for something to distract myself realising I've been eye fucking him, "What the-" I mumble, realising the tent forming in my ripped jeans, did he notice... my mind racing a voice broke me out of my thoughts.

"Hey, Kid look what I found" He calls to me

'I TOLD YOU TO CALL ME Y/N" I reply hastily

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 1 complete ✅

OMG I LOVED WRITING THIS ALSO FIRST FIC IVE WRITTEN IN A LONG TIME SO GO EASY ONE ME, anyway If you like this fic I'd love feetback so Id be motivated to keep written also if you have any suggestions to add into the fic ID LOVE To HEAR :D <333

Ash xx

Also if you reblog MARRY ME PLSS >-<

[gallavich-headcanon]

More Milkovich sibs because I was thinking about them on the ride home:

Mickey would get so much as a sniffle and Colin would be washing out the meth making pot and trying to make soup. He always used not enough salt and too much tomato sauce and Mickey loved it every time

Mickey saw Colin through rehab three times, because Colin is the only non casual drug user in their family and that scares him

Iggys teachers gave up on him pretty early on and Mickey went in there and said "oh no you fucking don't. You get him an autism or dyslexia diagnosis or whatever the fuck and you get him whatever he fucking needs" and then Terry ruined that effort but for a little while Iggy got real, actual help and around season 11 I picture him studying to get his bachelor's in social work or something.

Mickey taught him to read and.now Iggy loves it

Mickey let Mandy practice makeup on him while locked behind three closed doors and only when Terry was for sure away from the house. Mandy's never forgotten it

Their group chat is full of among us games and only the DANKEST of memes. Jamie just makes the best fucking references.

Sandy has the group chat on mute and.pops in occasionally to absolutely destroy Mickey about every single goddamn typo he makes

Mickey doesn't know how Sandy always knows and can only assume she's magic

Whenever Mandy argues with him about anything at all, Mandy adds Ian to the chat, let's him send like two messages to prove she's right before kicking him out again

Mickey, shouting across the apartment: STOP COERCING WITH MY SISTER YOU LITERALLY DONT EAT MUSHROOMS

Ian, shouting back: BUT ITS SO FUN

Terry was. Afraid. Of mickey. Just a bit. Mickey doesn't know this. Colin does and he thinks Mickey knows. Mickey is still deeply scared of Terry, but like fuck is he touching anyone else Mickey fucking loves.

Alicia it's always so good seeing your name pop in my inbox! Let's get to it!

Washing out the meth making pot and trying to make soup. -> HAHAHA you can't start with such a banger!

Iggy getting his shit together- this is a personal canon-ish headcanon of mine- We don't see Iggy in s10-11 because he ran away to get his life together. He knows he can't do that with Terry around. He's not as strong willed as Mickey to stand up to Terry so he had to disappear. Mickey has his burner phone for emergencies but Iggy only comes back to Chicago after Terry is dead. Maybe he crushes on I&M's couch for a week while he's looking for an apartment.

Sandy having the group chat on mute and popping in occasionally to absolutely roast Mickey sounds so accurate.

Oh I don't think Ian would risk his life by getting in between Mandy and Mickey. That kid has good survival instincts.

Terry was afraid of mickey. -> I agree. I think he knew how smart and mental strong Mickey is. More than everyone in that family. So he tried to control him so much when he was younger, because he knew if Mickey was on his side he would be so successful but if Mickey was against him, he could ruin him. Mickey has the brains, the muscles and the spirit. He was kind of Terry's secret weapon, going on runs with him from a very young age, while bossing everyone around.

But once the spell has been broken and Mickey started standing up to Terry, he resorted into trying to crush his spirit so he would do whatever Terry wanted him to.

[l0velace]

MÆRA

《Incubation in 3..2..1..》

*krxh* "Dont you fret hun, i know its daunting down there in that chamber but we're up here with sweaty palms too. Now the fluid is breathable and full of that sweet ambrosia so go ahead and take a breath, relax, and drift away" *khp*

She's right its always a crapshoot isnt it tryn sumthn new nd honestly this fluid hasnt even reached my mouth and i already feel better, less tense, floaty like a salt bath if it were the color and viscosity of dirty engine oil..

Smells sweet, almost like rot but in a medicinal way... ambrosia huh, hear goes... tastes like fruit juice on my knee... not that hard to move through my lungs actually, i wonder how lon....

■

"Slipped right past hypnogogia... hope that ain't the case on the flipside. Lower the serum dosage 20%."

"Yessir, entering stage 3......stage 4..... cresting, begining reentry, stage 3"

"Drop another 20. Shit boy slow down. He lied to you Doc."

"It would seem so."

"No drug use my ass."

"We've reached hypnopompia sir."

"Atonia?"

"Yessir!"

"Hot Dog!"

■

Fuck, fuck why can't i talk? Shit somethings wrong w the fluid i cant move! What is-

"Hey sugar, i imagine you might be feelin' like a corpse in a casket right about now..."

No fucking shit! I fucked up!

"Like there's six feet of soil between you and sunlight..."

FucK! Im so dead...goddamnit!

"I'm gonna need you to start diggin' kid. I need you to take all the hypervigilance u can squeeze outta your adrenals and push out..."

They've been doin a lil overtime sorry!...shit come on! Pleaasssse

"Focus on the edges of your vision and try to see past all that filth in the pit."

Yah focus on the tears welling up. Great.

I wish i could do something other than freaking out. Fuck i didnt think a dark room could spin this much. Dont hurl. No hurling. Pleass God.

Wait how did Jacinta get in my-

Woah im outside.... That ridgeline its the Salspar Escarpment...

"There you go, Youre a natural kiddo! Now walk toward the escarpment keep your eyes on Salvor's Peak."

I can do that... heh mom always said i needed direction guess i got one. East by Southeast. Honestly one of the better directions westerly spring winds and the rings of Cathaş blaze violet in the afternoon sun. Oh fuck almost tripped that would have been embarassing Jacinta would hav- Why do my feet look so weird and my legs i look lik afucking bug! FUCK oh god wheres my dick?! Wheres my SkIN! FUCKFUKfuckFug I cant feel anything why didnt my knees hurt when i fell? My hands are tearing into my thigh but i cant feel it FUck im bleeding fuCk its everywhr fuck i-

■

"heyy kid how ya feeln?", Jacinta whispers.

She lightly brushes the hair out of my face. Her weight is flushing the mattress so that the side of my hip is pressed into hers. She clasps her hand to my forehead then my feels my quickly flushing face. The evening light leaking in through the shuttered windows lights her black hair to amber. She gives me a crooked smile.

"You're burnin up buddy. We gotta get some fluids in you..."

She turns to a small table behind her, her messy plait spills over her shoulder and swishes over the bare small of her back. The rattle of paper on board heralds

"Petragua or citralyte?"

I absently nod to the petragua and she replaces the other and proffers my mouth a straw.

Why am i always so... behind. Its like im in slow motion...always just barely responding...

She gazes down at me warmly as i suck down the plum-apricot-chem slurry. The infusion perks me up a bit.

"Alright now don't drain it dry. Don't want it coming back up all over my vest."

She pulls it from my lips and i eek a short and quiet sucking sound that manages a full 5 seconds of embarrassment even though the sound was .3 seconds long.

"Ill be real with ya. You did great..exceptional even! Most of the time we dont even get to a stroll the first time we just... well its a whole lot more work on my end than what happened with you so i just wanted to say... im proud of you."

She squeezes my shoulder and flashes me a big deep blue smile.

"I know all this been hard on you and you've put in a lot of work before you even got in the pit and it payed off."

She picks up the petragua again and hangs it in the air for a second.

"To your dreams...or better yet your nightmares."

She sips some of it then positions it back towards me again. I slurp with even more energy this time.

"Having such a strong liminal drive link seams to really make a difference. Honestly i think you two should meet but we have to get clearance pfft its bullshit. How are you supposed to pilot together if you don't even know eachother? How are we supposed to figure out what this spark is that makes the liminal drive work if we never get to observe you interactin' in a controlled manner? I swear im gonna have a word-"

*slurpppppp* she pulls it from my face.

"Oh listen to me blatherin' on, you only got 18 hours til you're on duty again. You can head back to your room whenever. Ill see you then ok? I just wanted to check in on you."

She finishes donning her vest and clacks and jingles out the door with her plait fishtailing behind her.

[nowthatimlivingunderground]

The best part of all of this? It took about a month but I finally saw her real smile again. Her real laugh. It took so long but she was finally doing better. And then my aunt comes back and does it again, except now shes screenshotting just the parts where shes pushed my wife to her breaking point and she fights back because who in their right mind is gonna sit there when theres 50 messages pointing every little mistake, every flaw, and talking shit about me and her both and just expect her to sit and smile? No she snapped. But she takes those screenshots of what my wife sends her when shes finally had enough (everything she has said to her is q hell of a lot nicer than what I've said and would say) and she sent that to our nani. The one person in my life who has always been a constant. Shes always been so jealous bc me and nani were so close and I really hope shes happy because I'm losing that now too. My aunt has painted a picture of my wife that just isnt fucking true and keeps playing the victim. And my heart is shattered bc my nani doesnt see it. She just sees what my wife wrote in anger and hurt. Not the 50 messages before that. Not the messages she sent that just said "I love you, I hope you're alright" "take care of yourself, we both love you" nobody sees that tho. They see the angry hurt side of her that was ripped out of her my someone trying to get their way. My nani wont talk to my wife anymore and they talked almost every day. That was the one family member I never thought I'd lose. But she wants me too keep my wife's anger under control? Called to tell me to tell my wife it was uncalled for to call her a methhead and to never do it again. "That was too far" and for the first time ever, I snapped at my 73 y/o nani. Told her how I didnt really care if it hurt my aunts feelings bc she should read over 100 messages that say things that are a hell of a lot worse than that. That cut deeper than that. "Your aunt didnt mean any of that shes just getting off streeT drugs and alcohol and she does the same thing to me you just have to take it with a grain of salt" nani no. Not anymore I dont. When I was a kid getting that stuff screamed into my face? Yea I'd take it. But not now. I'm an adult and I have a family now. I'll be damned if i sit back and let her talk to her like that. They dont see the pain it causes her. They dont see the side of her I do because they pushed her away. Why. Why fucking do this to us. We went down there to support her for her wife's funeral. I wish I had never fucking gone.

[music-of-melody]

terra: did you eat all of the brownies downstairs???

aisha: hahahaha, yes they were amazing!

terra: ... it’ll kick in soon

aisha: .... terra ....

aisha: what is kicking in soon

aisha: teRRA

[willowwhispersspeakeasy]

Hi love your work on the potion and the kiss twst request and I was wondering if you could do the same thing four malleus , vil and epel also Rook if not that’s fine just keep up the great work and stay safe out there:)

Anonymous asked:

Might as well request the twst! they force you to drink a potion w/ a kiss for pomefiore cuz it just. Makes. Sense. 🌟

twst! they force you to drink a potion w/ a kiss

characters: Vil Schoenheit, Epel Felmier, Malleus Draconia

Rook drabble that started it all: here (ps if you like this trope with him go scroll through @raven-at-the-writing-desk 's Dorm Leader Rook au. my favorites are this and this post.)

warnings: gender neutral reader, overblot!Vil, non con kissing, poisoning, possessive themes, drugging, some mildly suggestive themes for Malleus

Vil

you know hes the dorm leader of Pomefiore right? so he has to be good at brewing poisons... I know I said dont trust Jade but Vil is far more dangerous.

you had never seen a more beautiful overblot than Vil's. he shined like stained glass, tears like black oil reflective in the light they danced with iridescent colors.

Vil was the very archetype of the monstrous feminine. the maternal protectiveness for his loved ones, the eyes of wonder and sorrow of the maiden, and the sly and scheming pain of the crone.

he was beautiful in the way a hurricane was beautiful, destruction and sorrow and unbridled power. yet as you stood in the eye of the storm, all was quiet.

the claws of his hands were gentle as he cupped your face. tears like ink dripped from his chin. your hands twitched with the desire to wipe them away. you longed to hold him, to cradle him, to assure him everything would be alright.

lying to your queen can get you beheaded you know.

"...am I truly hideous to you now?" he spoke, voice echoing like the halls of an empty church.

"you could never be hideous Vil, even if you tried." you replied, backed against a wall. your eyes scanned behind him, trying to find an exit. a way back to your friends, and away from the dangerous monster who had replaced your dear friend.

"look at me." the command was rough, your chin trapped between claws. you gasped, held in place by the man before you. "you will look at me. you belong to me. you are mine."

you gasped in surprise as he kissed you. you can't lie and say you haven't imagined kissing him many times, wondering what his lips would taste like. breakfast tea perhaps? mint leaves? candied apples?

his mouth now tasted like tar and salt. tears and ink mixed on your tongue as he sobbed into your mouth.

"I'm sorry, I'm hideous- please dont leave me," he cried, holding you tighter against himself. "please, you can't leave me!"

"shh Vil, I'm right here. please, you have to calm down." you begged for more time. more time to escape, more time for your friends to find you.

"yes, you won't leave me... you won't." he was muttering to himself, the poised and polite man you'd known had fallen fully into his madness.

with a snap of his fingers he produced a vial of blue liquid. it bubbled within its container and you dared not think what the substance was for.

''you won't leave... because if I can't have you," Vil popped the vial open with his thumb. "no one can."

you watched in horror as he emptied it into his mouth.

"Vil no!" you cried, reaching for his face to try and catch him before swallowing the poison. but you were naive. he crashed his mouth to yours once again, tilting your chin and letting the poison fall into your mouth.

you gasped and sputtered after he pulled away, ribbons of the blue liquid cascading down your chin. but you'd already swallowed it, and the world around you started to spin.

"mine." Vil's claim echoed in your head, bouncing around in the empty space, before your vision went black.

Epel

I think he'd do it more as a prank than anything truly nefarious. hes a good kid, hes just tired of people not taking him seriously.

"I'm just saying, I could defiantly beat you to the gate." you huffed, stretching your arms over your head.

"like hell you can, you're on!" Epel grinned, his competitive nature taking over. the pair of you sprinted as fast as you could to the gate of NRC.

his small frame made him quick on his feet, able to dart fast around obstacles and clime trees with ease.

it was close but at the last moment you managed to crash into the gate just before he did, panting hard but still shouting your victory.

"haha! told you so!" you gasped, triumphant grin on full display.

"damnit, you're really fucking fast." he panted, leaning against the gate to catch his breath.

"guess you're gunna have to practice with Deuce and Jack before you can beat me~" you teased. he sent you a glare, pushing himself off the metal gate he'd been leaning on.

"what, you dont think im man enough to beat you by myself?" he huffed. you paused. you knew Epel was often teased for his feminine appearance and that it was a touchy subject, so you tried to leave it alone.

"come on, me beating you in a race doesn't have anything to do with that. it just means im faster than you~" you teased. "I bet I could beat Jack easy peasy! hes so big he can't go as fast anyway."

this seamed to relax Epel, realizing you weren't teasing him for lacking masculinity, just teasing him for being slower than you.

"I'd like to see that. we should have a race with the three of us next time." he grinned and laughed. you relaxed, seeing his mood had returned to normal once more. "but I can prove my manhood to you in other ways."

you quirked a brow at his challenge, confused. the pair of you began walking back towards the center of the courtyard. returning to your bags you pulled out a water bottle to take a drink, tired from the sprint.

Epel ripped it out of your hands. you let out a yelp of surprise and protest, sending him a glare as he took a drink from your water bottle.

"do you mind-" you signed and began to complain before you were grabbed by the back of the neck and pulled into a kiss.

he tasted fresh and sweet as the water in his mouth slipped into yours. you let out a garbled moan before he pulled away. your cheeks flared bright red and he grinned triumphantly.

"see, told you. I can make you all flustered easy."

Malleus

ooh, yes scheming dragon brooding on his throne. tail curled down and tapping at his boot impatiently. hes greedy by nature and he doesn't like when you refuse him~

you had been tugged along by an excited Lilia, the small fae chirping about how Malleus had requested your presents. joining the four Diasomnia members back at the valley had been an, interesting way to spend your vacation.

you were thankful to Lilia for dragging you away from Sebek, whom had been loudly bragging how superior Briar Valley was to the other regions. your tolerance for the young man was higher then most, but that didn't mean his superior attitude wasn't annoying.

Lilia pushed you gently through a door way, offering you a wave and a playful grin before closing the door behind you.

"Child of Man?" you turned to the room, finding yourself in a breathtaking gothic library. Malleus sat elegantly upon a velvet highback chair, placed across from a fireplace. it burned bright with glowing green flames as your partner lowered his book.

"hey, Lilia said you asked for me." you wandered closer, still taking in the grander of the room and the breathtaking stain glass windows.

"ah, yes I did." he placed the book down on the side table, before turning his glowing eyes to watch you curiously. "you had yet to visit this room."

"I-i've never seen anything like it." you admitted. your mind danced with the possibilities of stories whispered into the wood of the shelves. the ages and languages of a fae's library casting its spell of wonder upon you.

"I am glad you are pleased." Malleus hummed, an amused smirk on his lips. "but please come here, beastie." you turned and followed his wishes as he beckoned you forward.

Malleus tugged on your hips once you were in range of his reach. he guided you down to sit on his lap, pulling your legs to straddle his waist.

you blushed at the intimacy of the position, his long fingers tracing your sides over the fabric of the robes you had been given by Lilia. it seamed most fae did not wear the customary clothes of the other realms, instead dawning in robes of jewel tones, reminding you more of Pomefiores uniform then anything else you'd seen.

"there they are, my lovely little beastie~" Malleus traced his hand up to your face. fingers soft as he traced your jaw, then your cheekbones, then your ears. his soft caresses sent shivers down your spine. touched like you were one of the priceless old books hidden away in this library.

"we dragons are greedy folk. i... dislike to see how you are dragged around by Sebek and Silver." he admitted, stroking just behind your ear.

"for the record its mostly Sebek, Silvers just sort of, there." you let out a half hearted chuckle. Malleus hummed in acknowledgement.

"as pleased as I am to let you have friends your own age, and kind, I still crave you by my side." his breath is hot as he leans down to your neck. he traces your skin with his nose, lips hovering just above. only pressing when he speaks.

"M-Malleus, please," his name was still foreign on your lips, having to remind yourself to call him such while you were here. his chest rumbles warmly as he chuckles, breath coming in puffs against your exposed skin.

"perhaps you are greedy for my affections to." he teases, finally giving you what you want. his mouth is warm and soft as he places kisses over your neck, your head bent in the opposite direction to give him more room to spoil you.

you can feel the fae practically purr in delight at the small gasps and whines you let out. his fangs are sharp as they brush against your skin, but he never bites down with them, only teasing.

"stay with me while I read, won't you?" he whispers the request in your ear, letting you feel the vibrations of his voice against the cartilage.

"j-just like this?" you asked, practically trembling on his lap. he pulls away, holding your chin with his thumb and forefinger. glowing green eyes, sinister enough to match the flames of the fireplace, trace your body. you feel fully exposed and vulnerably to the creature before you, to spite still being fully clothed.

"you are shaking, I suppose that won't do." he comments. his eyes flicker back to yours for a moment, sly grin pulling at his mouth. "I think I have a solution for you, Child of Man."

he reaches to the table he'd placed his book on, and retrieves a small vial. the liquid held within is a dark slate grey, but it shimmers mysteriously in the low lighting.

"open this." he instructs. you do as told, placing the stopper on the table and holding the vial, expecting his next orders to be to drink it.

he does nothing of the sort, instead covering your smaller hand with his, and having you bring the vial to his lips. his eyes hold your gaze intently as he guides you to tilt it, letting the liquid fall past his lips and into his mouth.

you set the vial down on the table, turning your attention back to him in time to see a shift in his gaze. half lidded now, and the bright green burns lower, closer to an emerald now.

hes quick but not harsh as he grabs you by the back of your neck and pulled you in to kiss him. Malleus tilts your chin up, letting the liquid fall into your mouth. it holds no flavor, just a slight acidic fizz.

you are far more distracted by the way his tongue tangles with yours. obediently swallowing the substance you are rewarded by his tongue, gentle but heavy as he holds you still. using your mouth has he pleases.

"good, now relax for me." he coos as he pulls away. your eyelids droop as a warm and tingly feeling spreads across your limbs. it comes to rest heavy in your stomach, causing you to let out a whimper.

Malleus chuckles, dark and deep in his chest. it rumbles against your cheek as he tucks you into his own body.

"shh now, I won't forget your needs, little one. just be patient for now, and let that potion do its work."

[astrobiche]

Astro notes 10 🐞

Disclaimer : based on my personal observations so take it w a grain of salt 🌷

Photos not mine, credits to the owner(s). Do not steal my work.

🍒 Aqua mars tend to like mechanics/engineering

🍒 developed aquarius placements are the most empathetic people i know. Their ability to understand how the human mind works and pick up on body language then try their best to make everyone feel comfortable is unmatched. Very high EQ.

🍒 fire sign + water rising culture is assertively voicing your opinion but getting hurt and tearing up when u get backlash

🍒 Fire dominants can have a high metabolism. (Sweat easily and go to the bathroom frequently)

🍒 Aquarius placements/ uranus dominants may feel like they were born "too early". Like they held all these progressive ideologies growing up and felt misunderstood but when they're older they realize the younger generation now possesses them. May get along better with younger people.

🍒 every single person who told me they dont wanna get married or have kids has been an aqua placement 💀 they find it constricting but i noticed having cancer/capricorn help them settle down later in life

🍒 virgo + sag in chart : "im anxious bc i didnt plan how this will go but am i thrilled by the lack of planning? Yea"

🍒 leo risings can be so delicate and thin/ small, some of them remind me of cute cats

🍒 libra and taurus placements can become bffs so fast!!

🍒 Pisces mercury/3h neptune LOVE to talk about belief systems/spirituality like u could just meet them for the first time and theyre talking about how drugs helped them understand the universe and be enlightened and "i wasn't in a good place spiritually" -a 3h neptune native

🍒 A good synastry indicator is having one (or more) of the signs in ur big 3 in their big 3 or signs opposite to urs. Or ur rising sign is right next to theirs : for example : cancer rising and gemini rising/leo rising.

Imo, similar placements can clash so having someone's moon as the other's sun for example is better than having the same sun/moon/rising

🍒 the difference between a sign and a planet in a house is subtle but important, for example :

1h uranus w aquarius in the 6th house : changes initiated by the individual affect the job

Aquarius 1st w uranus in the 6th : changes to the job can affect the individual

🍒 i noticed that a lot of virgo suns (especially masculine presenting ones) give off the same vibe, (ofc this wouldnt apply to everyone its just a pattern i noticed) : skater/chill vibes, like to wear beanies and layered clothes, they love pets so much and especially dogs, "im somewhere else" energy

🍒 12h gemini/mercury natives should be careful when reading about topics they're interested in right before bed, their brain may already be too active so reading may make sleeping a little harder (you should still study tho 🤨 this applies more to reading for fun than studying)

🍒 sometimes, leo venus can NOT tolerate being disrespected in group settings. They may take jokes or teasing too seriously if they're not comfortable with you

🍒 9h jupiter natives can have a beneficial relationship w their in laws or benefit from them financially

[eddiescorrodedcoffin86]

Creel

Requested by this lovely anon I hope you guys like it cause omg I was so excited to start it lol. y/m/n (your mom's name). Dr. Brenner's actions and plans in this fic ARE NOT canon in the show other than the fact that he wants to make more One's and all the experiments. His process and technique are completely and utterly made up by me because we dont know much about how he was creating the children I had to make something up please take his methods and techniques in this fic, as well as how the biology and all of it works, with a grain of salt. Thank you. You're 13 during the whole Henry killing all the kids part.

Character death (I guess you could call it major cause it’s your mom and this part is about her and Henry). Violence. I don't think there's a lot of warnings for this chapter lol. Henry/Peter/One/Vecna may seem a little ooc but i just feel like he would've liked to have a little nugget lol.

Your mother met Dr. Brenner in the summer of 65, and by January 1966, she was working and staying in Hawkins laboratory. Peter, or Henry as he'd later revealed to her, was taken with her almost immediately, always leaving little origami birds and other things in her room if he noticed the door was open and she wasn't in there. Henry did a wonderful job of seducing your mother, having her completely in love with him before the end of the year.

"I think Papa is suspicious." Henry'd told her one day, the two of them putting their clothes back on, Henry straightening her collar for her before smoothing his hands over her shoulders.

The thought of Dr. Brenner finding out, knowing about what she was doing with Henry in the dark, made her heart race and her breathing pick up. "Is... do you know if he's angry?" She asked nervously.

Henry tilted his head before shaking his head a little. "I'm not sure he knows... but he seems to think something is going on, perhaps we slow our meetings a bit." He suggested, and with heavy reluctance she agreed.

They managed to keep their relationship hidden from Dr. Brenner for the remainder of the year. Until, unfortunately, your mother found out she was pregnant. She'd been ecstatic at first, impatiently waiting to tell Henry all day, but as the day went on she got more and more nervous about the outcome, about what would happen if Dr. Brenner were to ever find out.

When she told Henry it had been in the privacy of one of their usual meeting spots, Henry stepping around his corner to greet her. The smile he saw was different from the one he usually got, and it immediately had him asking what she was thinking about. When she showed him the paper, and explained what he really needed to be looking at, he was more excited than he'd expected himself to be.

He liked the children in the lab, most of them were just ordinary children, failed experiements where Brenner couldn't quite get the mixture of Henry's DNA right to successfully grow them in an incubator rather than inside their mothers. Half of the incubated babies had failed, of course, and most of them would die shortly after Dr. Brenner's experiments began, their young bodies not strong enough to handle it yet.

He began taking pregnant women who didn't want their babies after that, subjecting to different drugs and tests, while simultaneously injecting Henry's DNA directly into the sacks of their unborn babies. (pls, again, do not take the biology of this seriously i took 10th grade biology and that was it. I'm almost positive this would be ineffective.)

"I'm going to get you out of here." Her bump was just starting to show, though thanks to her bulky uniform it was barely visible, but soon even the uniform wouldn't hide it, and that scared her more than anything. "How...?" "I'm not sure yet, but soon, my love."

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

She was woken up abruptly about a week later, Henry was rushing into her room and telling her they had to go, that they would notice he was gone soon.

As they were just about to make it off the property they'd been stopped by several guards, and after Henry pleaded with her to go, pushing a piece of paper into her hand, he watched as she ran into the forest before doing his best to keep the facility distracted so they couldn't go after her, until suddenly he felt a sharp pain in his back, and then he saw darkness, he woke up without his powers and strapped down.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

The paper had instructions for y/m/n to follow to a cabin, hidden off in the woods by a group of Evergreen trees, she made as little trips to town as she could, getting everything she could to get through the pregnancy on her own, changing her name even so Dr. Brenner wouldn't be able to ask around town about her.

When Papa had finally come for you, you were still young, 6 and just getting a real grip on your powers thanks to your mother. It had been your 6th birthday, you'd gotten up excited, eager to see your birthday breakfast. Instead, you were met with an empty kitchen and living room, and when you'd gone to your mother's room, you'd crawled up into her bed with her and tried to wake her, shook her and screamed until your voice was raw

That's when he came, his suit clean and unwrinkled, his cologne strong, he'd stepped towards you, two men by his sides, but they'd been knocked back. Just a couple feet because you hadn't quite worked up enough strength to sling people around yet.

A look you couldn't describe flashed in his eyes as he tried to calm you and ensure you that everything was fine. Papa had a funeral for your mother, and afterwards you went to live at the facility with all the other children.

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

That was when you met him, Peter, he'd been kind to you, always greeting you with a soft smile and something folded from paper almost every day. Of course, he didn't tell you the truth of who he was, you were still grieving the loss of your mother, and judging from your lack of success in the games, the loss of your powers as well.

"It helps to breathe." You flinched from where you were glaring at the game of chess in front of you, trying to push one of the pieces, and turned your head, shaking your head at Peter and looking back at the game, squinting and pushing it off the table. "Useless." You replied.

As you got older you and Peter got closer, he was kinder to you than most of the other orderlies, and even some of the children, so you found yourself drawn to him any time he was in the room. You couldn't place the sense of comfort, familiarity, that you felt around him, how the lump in your throat would sometimes disappear and you could just barely feel the tickle of power in your fingertips again, but then the anxiety would take over and it would be gone.

You'd been eight when you felt the power fully return, almost stronger than before, and you even beat 2! The proud looks on Peter and Papa's faces were enough to keep you buzzing inside for days! You'd finally succeeded!

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>

After your 12th birthday everything had changed. Peter, Henry, had begun telling you to the truth, telling you about 001, what Papa was doing, how he got the idea. This, though, you couldn't believe this.

"Papa.. Papa wouldn't." You shook your head at Peter, the two of you standing in the boiler room. "He said he would never hurt us. Papa loves us." You tried to reason.

"Papa lies to you." Henry corrected, frowning deeply. "He keeps you locked up here, testing you, experimenting on you." He stepped close to you and laid his hand on your cheek. Then you saw it 001 tattooed harshly into his skin, a contrast to your slightly neater 009 tattoo.

"You're One.." you mumbled softly, looking up at Henry quickly. "Mama said that..." Henry nodded slowly. "I'm your father." He said softly. "But... but why would Papa kill Mama? I don't understand." Tears filled your eyes as you tried to wrap your head around it.

"To get to you. Your mother was keeping you safe, she protected you from him, for much longer than I thought she would've been able to." He said softly. "But Papa... is an evil man, he tells you he loves you and that he's keeping you all safe, but he's not. He's holding you hostage, prisoner, here."

"I... but the others... Eleven..." You glanced at the door to the boiler room and then up at Henry. "I can not leave her." Henry didn't seem too pleased with the idea of someone else tagging along, but agreed regardless and after you took his implant out and got Eleven, he hid the two of you in a closet and told you not to come out.

When you heard the screams of the other children and the orderlies, you and Eleven held onto eachother tightly, until Eleven convinced you to go see what was going on with her.

You were surrounded by the bodies of the orderlies and other childre, you and Eleven still clinging to eachother as you made it to the rainbow room, looking at one another before stepping in.

you were met with the sight of a a dozen bodies, a mix of children and orderlies, and One, who had Two pinned to the wall, his eyes rolled back and bleeding. Everyone's bones were broken, twisted in ways you didn't think were possible. Eleven stumbled back as you watched Two's bones snap and then his body hit the ground.

At the sound of your breathing Henry turned his head and looked back at the two of you over his shoulder. "I asked you to wait, Nine." You swallowed thickly and turned, running to the door and opening it, gasping when it was yanked shut, you and Eleven trying to yank it open before turning to look at him, when he moved closer you stepped in front of Eleven.

"Why cry for them, Nine" Henry tilted his head a little, taking your chin in his fingers lightly. "Why do you care for them? Do you think they cared for you? Do you think they would've cried for you?"

"I know you're scared." He whispered, letting his hand drop from your cheek as he gazed down at Eleven, the 7 year old clinging to your hospital gown. "Both of you. I was scared once too. I know what it's like to be different. To be alone in this world."

"Like you two, I didn't fit in with the other children. Something was wrong with me. All the teachers and the doctors said I was... broken." He turned and started walking away from you. "My parents..." he gazed at the distruction and death he'd caused. "Thought a change of scenery, a fresh start in Hawkins, might just cure me. It was absurd. As if the world would be any different here." He seethed.

"But then... to my surprise, our new home provided a discovery." You thought you could see a flash of fleeting happiness in his eyes. "And a newfound sense of purpose. I found a nest of black widows living inside a vent. Most people fear spiders..." You couldn't speak, you didn't know what to say, if it would be inappropriate to speak, you were terrified. "They detest them. And yet, I found them endlessly fascinating. More than that, I found a great comfort in them. a kinship. Like me, they are solitary creatures. And deeply misunderstood." You pulled Eleven closer when you heard her whimper. "They are gods of our world. The most important of all predators. They immobolize and feed on the weak, bringing balance and order to an unstable ecosystem." He turned to look at the two of you, frowning.

"But the human world was disrupting this harmony. You see, humans" he said the word with so much disgust, you almost thought he didn't put himself in the category. "are a unique type of pest, multiplying.." he tilted his head ever so slightly. "and poisoning our world, all while enforcing a structure of their own. A deeply unnatural structure. Where others saw order, I saw a straighjacket. A cruel, oppressive world dictated by made-up rules. Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, decades." You let Eleven back away from you, holding your ground between the two of them.

"Each life a faded, lesser copy of the one before. Wake up, eat, sleep, reproduce, and die." His voice was getting louder, echoing around you, his eyes glassing up as he got angrier, but you stayed where you were, you weren't going to let him scare you, you had to protect Eleven. "Everyone..." he started walking closer to you. "Is just..." closer. "Waiting." Closer. "Waiting for it all to be over." Closer. "All while performing in a silly, terrible play," he was standing directly in front of you now. "Day after day. i could not do that. I could not close off my mind and join in the madness. I could not pretend." He held his hand up towards his head and took a deep breath, making a flicking motion like he was turning a switch.

"And I realized I didn't have to." He tilted his head to be at eye-level with you. "I could make my own rules. i could restore balance to a broken world. A predator... but for good. As I practiced, I realized i could more than I possibly imagined." His brows furrowed. "i could reach into others, into their minds, their memories. I became an explorer." You followed him when he started walking away. "I saw my parents as they truly were. To the world they presented themselves as good, normal people. but like everything else in this world, it was all a lie. A terrible lie. They had done things, Nine, Eleven. Such awful things. I showed them who they really were. I held up a mirror. My naive father believed it was a demon cursing them for their sins. But my mother somehow knew." He sounded in awe for a second.

"Knew it was I who was holding up that mirror, and she despised me for it. She called a doctor, an expert. She wanted him to lock me away, to fix me, even though it wasn't I who was broken. It was them. And so she left me with no choice. No choice but to act. To break free. With each like I took, I grew stronger. More powerful. They were becoming a part of me. But I was still a child. I did not yet know my limits. And it nearly killed me. He was arrested, blamed for the death of my sister and mother, just as I had planned." He was evil.. you didn't understand how your mother could love a man like him, how anyone could fall in love and have a baby with a man with such.. twisted ideologies.

"But I was far from free." You stood your ground as he moved closer to you and Eleven, keeping her behind you. "i woke up from my coma only to find myself placed in the care of a doctor, the very doctor i had hoped to escape. Dr. Martin Brenner. Papa. But the truth... the truth is he did not just want to study me. He wanted more." He nodded at you slightly, his eyes glued to yours, getting impossibly bluer as his eyes glassed up, you could hear Eleven's breathing change behind you, he was scaring her.

"He wanted to control. When Papa finally realized he could not control me, he tried to recreate me. He began a program. And soon, others were born. You were born." He looked at Eleven and then back to you. "And I am so glad you were, Nine. You as well, Eleven. So very glad." You looked away from him as you felt tears burning your eyes, looking at the children laid on the ground, bones broken and bodies twisted.

"They're not gone, my love." Henry laid his hand on your cheek and turned your head to look at him. Your mother used to call you that, it was one of the few things about her that you could still remember, but hearing it come from him made your stomach lurch. "They're still with me. In here." He brought his hand up and laid his finger to his temple.

"You... tricked us.." Henry frowned at Eleven, like he was actually offended by her accusation. "Tricked you? No, I saved you. You are a prisoner here, just like me." He knelt down to be at eye level with her, despite you stepping to hide her again. "To Papa, you are nothing more than animals, monsters, lab rats to be tamed. But the truth, Nine, Eleven, the truth is just the opposite. You are better than they are." He looked towards the bodies and pointed to them. "Superior." He looked at you this time as he stood up. "That is why you frighten him. If you come with me, for the first time if your life, you will be free. Imagine what the three of us could do together. We could reshape the world, remake it however we see fit. Join me."

You looked up at him from where you'd been looking at the youngest, Five was only six, you couldn't imagine the power he could've gotten from her, she could barely lift a pencil cup she was so young. "No." You said quietly, shaking your head. Henry frowned deeply at you, and while he was thinking about that you used your powers to slam him back into the mirror, watching him hit the ground with a thud and a groan.

When Henry stood you straightened up and wiped the blood from your nose, the two of you walking towards eachother. Henry gained the upperhand rather quickly, since you were only 12 and he was in his 30s, your head had already begun to throb with the use of your powers, your heart pounding as blood dripped from your nose and ears, and you were starting to slip.

Before you knew it you were being thrown into the doors, the breath being knocked from your lungs as you hit the floor, barely having time to recover before you were being pulled around the room and slammed into the wall before stopping in front of Henry, your body turning to face him. "It wasn't supposed to go like this." He said.

The feeling of your bones cracking was a feeling you couldn't even begin to explain, it radiated through your ankles and all you could do was hang there in the air as blood started to spill, mixing with your tears to create a dark pink liquid.

And then, Henry was flying through the mirror and into the room behind it, and you were falling to the ground, you looked up at Henry, and then over to the side and were met with the sight of seven year old Eleven walking up beside you, her own hand held up towards Henry. Relief coursed through you and you looked back at Henry and slowly stood up, crying out softly as you stood on your sprained ankles.

You limped closer to him with Eleven by your side, you curled your first and lifted your hand towards Henry and looked at Eleven, who was looking at you, when you nodded, the two of you looked back at Henry and a white light came from him, you didn't know what it was, what was happening, or what that red glowing thing was, but as you and Eleven closed it, you didn't really care.

And then everything was black.

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[goatpaste]

shroom story? :0

 oh my god this sdgjkh sat in my inbox for days because i didnt have the energy to awnser it right away and then forgot. i think this was prompted because of this ask which still makes me laugh to think about 

anyways shroom story, its sdjkgh a favorite story in my server and new friends

but like ough i was in the summer between middle and highschool so like ?? 14 i think maybe 15, i forget what age most people are round then

but probably 15, old enough that my parents could question me doing any sorta drug in a normal way. like not a concerning way but in a genuine way.

and my parents smoke weed, SO much fucking weed all the fucking time their a nightmare. and i was in the room next to them and often could smell it in my room at night.

but myself, i dont do any sorta drug, just not something iv been able to do or had a desire for ig sorta.

also more context, my mom stopped smoking and this was about the time she started her road to being a crazy vegan person and it started when she watched some video about how refined sugars and salts will give you cancer. so out went all sugar and refined salts in our house for the rest of the time i lived with them.

but once in awhile when i had a few bucks i still went out and got soda and a snack at the gas station, or we’de have sweets like graham crackers or dfjkgh like literally whatever was sweet like some caramel on bread. shit like that. and on weekends id scrounge the cabinets for snacks and hole up in my room and watch shows on my computer in my room.

and so one night i was doing that and idk, as some of you can probably guess, i found two little chocolates wrapped in tin foil. and ME fucking absolute DUMBASS didn’t think anything of it and went mmm choncholate for sammi! and promptly took it to my room along with some other things.

was watching my show, snacking fine until the chocolates. 

let me reiterate, i am a fucking MORON.

i bit into the first one and went, yuck! gross!....... maybe the other one taste better? bit into that one, didnt taste good. went, hmm theres something in there maybe i need to eat around it. not realizing it was like THE WHOLE CHOCOLAte i tried to eat around the center to find it still gross, gave up and threw the chocolates away.

and see i didnt think anything of it because one, im a fucking idiot. and two, my date was terribly lactose intolerant and kept dark chocolate in the house and its very bitter and i didnt like it, and at the time had assumed it was just dark chocolate.

went back to my shows for awhile

annnd then the shrooms kicked in.

and to be clear, im a dumbass and had NO idea what i had just done.

and i start to feel sometHING is wrong with me and like i cant describe how it made me feel except that when it started my brain decided “oh god im being punished for not exercising enough. i dont do enough cardio and im dying RIGHT NOW for it.”

so i went outside to the backyard where my parents work blowing glass and making weed pipes. and im like... mother.. i have to go outside right now i need to run around the block right now

NOT RELIZING HOW INSANE I SOUNDED

and my mom straight up is like... are you on drugs???

and i ofc, somehow still dont click it together and go, “nononinon no no i dont do drugs!”

and return to my room to calm down and watch my show some more before i accept i MAY be high fjkghg

returning to the backyard both my parents are there and i tell them about the chocolate, they honestly think its a lil funny and my dad and is kinda like “ :O!! my fuckin shroom chocolate we were saving that!”

and they start like trying help me, asking me if i wanted to watch a movie in the living room until i come down and everything. and im telling them i want to be alone and go to sleep until  its over because i was miserable and a little stressed because OFC this didnt happen on my terms.

so i return to my room and try to lay down, but i remember like trying to close my eyes and just seeing fucking colors very much like a kaleidoscope. Annoyed i tried to push that from my vision

but when i would attempt to push away colors and find a dark patch in my like brain? there was a small puppet of me just like, doing the jig. And it was shaped like mister smarty pants from between the lions

so i give up on sleeping and grab my blanket and pillow and go to the living room, leaning against the wall singing “im just a kid” on the way.

i asked my parents to put on some disney movie, they told me no because it fuck me up too bad. and then they turned on the lorax.

i remember that movie being SO blurry and i remember looking at my mom and going “this movie is too fucking orange >:(”

the rest of it was mostly fine, i went outside with my mom and ask if she could hear my poop through the window to the bathroom that was connected to the patio. she told me no

my father tried to get me to drink nyquil, i said no and layed on the floor and rolled away from him because i just remembered i really didnt like how it tasted.

then my parents told me i texted my friends “i ate something weird and im starting to feel weird???” sdjkgh and they told me i needed to clear everything up and make sure my friends didnt think i was high. the next day i went to my friends house and told them this exact story, and iv been telling this story since.

[yelenasdog]

FUCK IT- DEAN THINKING OF EMMA YEARS AFTER SAM KILLS HER BC CANON SUCKS

btw for those of yall who dont remember ms. emma, she was dean’s amazonian daughter LOL

warnings: this is 1.3k words, has many plot inconsistencies ,and is basically an au where the slice girls happened before the whole amy situation. dean is kinda sick and creepy at one point but like bc he wants revenge ig? idk. also ik i have some mutuals who are also just starting spn, so s7 spoilers! LOL enjoy this mess

-

He had shaken his head, laughed, and looked up to the indigo sheet that rested above him, seeing how the stars seemed... dull. It was odd, as most nights, it was one of the few things that Dean Winchester would truly rely on always remaining the same.

For all his years as a hunter, through shitty motels, through demons and monsters and angels and apocalypses. The stars always were there when the sun would fall and the moon would arise, twinkling at him as if to say “we’re still here”. In fact, even before he was a hunter, though that time slot is miniscule as the salt grains he so heavily appreciated (and sometimes grew to loath), he would sit outside on the damp grass with his mother.

He would sit, and he would look up and smile at the dark sky, smiling at what Mary had told him about the stars.

“They’re angels.” She had said, leaning down to talk softly in her baby’s ear, playing with his soft brown locks. “All the people who died and went to Heaven.” She had lied, lied right through her teeth. Not that she knew it, of course. She knew the same was true about demons, so why wouldn’t it ring true with the supposed angels she believed in so fiercely?

But Dean still held that memory with him, even when she was gone, despite knowing it wasn’t truthful.

It was after a Djinn hunt, Dean was fifteen, sixteen in four days, matter of fact. His responsibilities had begun to evolve from watching over Sammy while his father was away (which he now knew he would never really stop doing), to assisting on hunts, learning from the elder Winchester for when he inevitably would have to take over the “family business”.

“Right, so a Djinn will poison their victim, putting them in a comatose state- Hey, are you listening to me at all? Did you hear a word I just said?” John had shouted, his son not even flinching as he would when he would be in the same position just a few years prior.

“When in the comatose state, the Djinn puts them in their dream life while they feed on the person, which is where the genie lore came from.” He recited, never looking down from where his head was angled upwards, enthralled by the stars. All the talk of dreams, wishes, he couldn’t help but think what life would be like if he was living his. Maybe get to be on the football team, have his own home, his own room, even.

Having his mom. Not having extensive knowledge on the fact that there really was a reason to be afraid of the dark.

As he got older, his idea of a “dream life” had changed. In a flurry, it seemed like it had somehow changed from having a normal high school experience and his mom being alive (even though that part never changed, just faded towards the back of his mind), to pushing that away and gravitating towards drinking, drugs, and girls. All only to come back to wanting a domestic life, one that he had with Lisa and Ben. He wanted that, badly, and when it was ripped away, he felt like a piece of his heart had been ripped out, too.

So he didn’t talk about it. He left, it hurt, and he didn’t talk about it, because that’s just what Dean Winchester did. He got snappy, moody, and slipped back into the habits and youthful rush of his years prior, much to Sam’s disappointment. Back to the girls, back to the drinking, all of it.

Nothing had stood out to him about the night he’d had with Emma’s mom. She was normal, the drinks were normal, all of it. It was routine, almost.

What was not routine, was having to return the next day, and finding a baby when there was not one there before. Even more out of the norm, was when the baby began to speak as if it were 8 years old. And so as him and Sam began to put together the pieces like some sort of fucked up jigsaw puzzle, it began to dawn on him; He could try again.

Sure, his daughter was a crazy Amazonion, and sure, it wouldn’t be ideal with being on the road and all, but family was family, right? But he knew it wouldn’t be easy, he was prepared to fight the internal battle he knew he would be cursed with. But she was innocent, she hadn’t killed anyone yet.

He pondered it, as he stood, walking over to the fridge. He knew this was an act, he knew that there was barley any hesitance in her heart as she stood, preparing to slain her father. Dean knew this, yet he couldn’t bring himself to kill her, take the easy shot. She was human, and she was his daughter.

Sam, on the other hand, showed no such mercy.

And Dean was grateful to his brother for saving his life, for killing the monster that he didn’t have the guts to gank. They’d killed blood before, no problem. Samuel was a problem, a threat, so he had to go. And Dean supposed that Emma shouldn’t have been different. Blood doesn’t always equal family, he supposed.

That night, he stepped outside of another shitty motel, telling Sam he had gone out for a smoke. And as he looked up at the sky, he tossed back his head and he laughed at the stars, as it no longer seemed like they were comforting him, but rather mocking him. Because Emma wasn’t up there. She wasn’t a sparkling ball of light, shining down on him.

Rather, she was probably scared, cold, and alone down in purgatory, fighting to stay alive. And the worst part was that he put her there. A day on Earth, barely getting a handle on things, and she’s thrown into purgatory by her father, of all people. And he knew that hopefully she would find some other Amazons that had managed to stay alive down there, and that with her strength and all, she would have a chance to survive.

But truthfully? He doubted she would. She was a tough kid, sure. But with the vamps and wendigos and whatever the Hell else was down there, he was having a hard time having faith.

It was only mere weeks later when Sam had let Amy off the hook.

And a part of him was bitter, angry, saddened. So why did Amy get to live? Why did Dean have to watch his blood, his daughter, get slaughtered by Sam, just because she was a monster? Why in God’s name did she have to die, but Sam’s little friend from however many years ago, got to live “just ‘cause”? It wasn’t right, none of it was.

And so he thought it would feel satisfying to drive the knife into her, to see the life leave her eyes.

But it didn’t, and Dean was confused as to why, as simple as it may have seemed. When he turned to see her son standing in the doorway, tears beginning to roll down his face, he understood.  

And when he had made it to purgatory all that time later, through the threats and scares pumping through his mind, he was consumed by thoughts of Emma. He wanted to ask Benny if he’d seen an Amazonian, who could be any age really, with orange hair and warm brown (or fiery red, depending on her mood) eyes. He wanted to grab and interrogate every creature in that damned place, demand them for answers. Though, he was afraid he wouldn’t like said answers.

He would find himself thinking of Emma right up until the moment he died, thinking for a moment that he would finally get to see her again, sort things out. After all, part of her was still human, or moreso, part of her was not a monster.

Even then, Benny was a monster, but he loved him like a brother, he’d do anything and everything for him. Sam, his own brother, was even a monster at one point, and Dean still loved him more than life itself. And when he would think back on this every so often, all he could think of, was why couldn’t he have loved her?

[illfoandillfie]

ok sorry but how many people do yall think rog has ever slept with cos i’m guessing four figures no lie

okay, i don’t normally respond to messages like this because, frankly, i dont really feel like its my place to speculate on roger’s sex life. Theres a difference between writing a fiction story with a character named after and inspired by him and discussing his actual personal life which i have no real knowledge about. What he gets up to in his free time is between him and the women he does it with. but i didn’t really feel able to ignore this one. please don’t take this as me telling you off or shutting you down or anything like that. If you want to speculate about roger’s body count thats up to you, go nuts with it. and i love when you guys message me and I don’t want to discourage you from feeling like you can talk to me or just send me your random thoughts or whatever about any subject. But I feel like I need to address why I disagree with this sentiment. Also so I can ask ya’ll to please stop asking me questions like this. 

So firstly, just to get this out of the way. 1000 is a lot. even 100 is a lot. I think if rog had slept with 1000+ people he’d have a least a few illegitimate kids and probably would have been checked into rehab for sex addiction (not to mention STIs and such because lbr people in the 70s specifically probs werent the most careful especially if drugs were involved). I mean even if we were going to say Rog got lucky with a different woman after every show we wouldn’t reach 1000. According to google, Queen played around 700 shows in their entire career. If we add shows played by The Cross thats only another 67 odd shows (according to wikipedia). 

now, i think there are 3 things that contribute to this idea of roger as especially promiscuous. 1. His attitude/demeanour/general way he sells himself. 2. the generally held conceptions about rock stars and rock star behaviour. and 3. what i’m going to call fandom dumbassery (but i mean that with a lot of love) 

So lets start with the man himself. Roger Taylor is loud and opinionated and not particularly humble. He knows he’s talented and attractive though for at least some time he was a little self-conscious about how feminine he looked. He’s always up for a laugh, likes to party and has admitted to enjoying his drink and his women. He’s had kids with two different women, who’s relationships “overlapped”, and is currently married to a third. At least that’s the perception we can gleam from his interviews, behind the scenes videos, and other public appearances. 

It’s easy to see how that image leads to accusations of being a womaniser and a cheater and basically a bit of a slut lmao. But here’s the thing. I think Roger, in part, markets himself that way. The thing is, if you look at his solo songs and the relationships he currently has with his kids and their mothers, and things other people have said about him/his relationships over the years, I think it’s fair to say he also has a bit of a romantic streak maybe? idk if thats the best way of describing it...he’s self confessed to not being a fan of marriage and the like but he’s not opposed to writing and singing love songs and seems to believe in ~love~ as a concept/power. He certainly cares deeply for those closest to him. Whether or not that translates to an agreement with monogamy I can’t say for certain. It’s hard to draw conclusions here because a lot of what we know of his personal life was fed to us through magazines and news paper gossip column articles and they were never looking for the truth, they were looking for scandal and sensationalism. 

For instance the whole thing with the overlapping relationships. I think most people who have read anything about roger and dom and debbie realise that it’s not as cut and dry as “he was cheating with debbie and left dom for her” even though that was the story being sold by the press at the time. The reality (or at least the version closer to reality since obviously no one outside of them and whoever they were closest with knows all the nitty gritty details) is that rog and dom had already split when they got married. it was a marriage of convenience to make sure her and the kids would be looked after financially etc even after he’d moved out. So while it looked to the public like he married one chick and 30 odd days later was spotted with another, there really wasn’t anything untoward happening.  I’m not saying he never had casual hookups or one night stands and i’m not saying he never cheated, but I do think some of it’s been exaggerated, whether by him to encourage the rock star perception or by newspaper/magazine articles.

Now, obviously, we have stories of rog, particularly in the late 60s and into the 70s, being with multiple women. There’s that bit in the Interview with a Queen “Groupie” (which is a fantastic read and i defs recommend checking it out if you havent already) where she talks about roger being a chick magnet and says that, at the time, it was pretty common to sleep about. But, she also says she didnt notice him doing it more or less than anyone else and seemed to mostly be with Jo (his girlfriend at the time). This is the same Jo that got a mention in the Queen in 3D book (”i think we all had the feeling that these two were together for life, but it was not to be”). Conversely, we have that quote (which i cannot find rn but i’ll link it when i do) about roger sometimes having one girl upstairs while another waited in the garage for them to be finished. I think it was about Rog in the mid-late 60s in Truro but whatever. Obviously he wasn’t anywhere near celibate and it’s likely was sleeping with people outside of his relationship(s). But one has to assume that as he got older those kinds of antics stopped happening, at least as frequently.

There is one potential story that I remember reading somewhere along the way about Roger cheating on Debbie while she was pregnant. But, take that with a grain of salt because I can’t find the article again and also I think it was from like The Sun or something equally as rubbish. The press was notoriously always printing mean shit about the boys and that might have been another thing they published to create scandal. Even so, if we assume it’s legit that is still only 1 story. Not to throw him under the bus but Brian is the one with multiple confirmed affairs, who literally wrote songs about it all. So why is Roger the one with sleazy reputation? 

This is where my second and third points come in. There is a pervasive idea about what it means to be a rock star. The whole trashing hotel rooms, sleeping with groupies, passing out drunk every night thing. And I’m sure that Queen was like that to an extent. I think it’s pretty common knowledge that all of them got up to shit on the road. Between innuendo laden interviews and songs, videos and accounts of their parties, stories CT has put online, and other stories like the one of Roger bringing out lines of coke as dessert when he was having dinner with motley crue. They definitely embraced the rock and roll lifestyle. And I think with Roger’s personality being what it is, it’s easy to link him to those traditional rock star tropes and say it was all true all the time. I also think Roger has done nothing to counter those beliefs. He’s been open about how he wanted to be a rock star since the minute he picked up a guitar, he’s labelled himself as a great lay in magazines, he’s joked about girls pulling their tits out over dinner in interviews (though he said he didnt take her home), he’s written songs like One Night Stand and Dirty Mind and Airheads which explicitly mention his preference for women and alcohol. I think it’s fair to say he’s kind of encouraged that view of himself. Whether it was just a side effect of being part of such a well known band and having such a boisterous demeanour/personality, or whether it was intentional as a version of promotion i don’t know. maybe a mix of them? I mean I’m sure it didn’t hurt sales and stuff. it’s the whole guys want to be him, girls want to be with him thing, right? Maybe that’s just me being cynical though lmao. 

Anyway, the fandom brain has taken all of that and compressed it into memes and jokes about rog being the band slut. Which i’m not complaining about, lord knows i’ve made the same jokes and reblogged the same posts and used those tropes in my fics. They’re funny and lend themselves to interesting fic concepts. Plus, i think roger is the sort of person who would probably laugh about most of it. But it’s an idea that keeps feeding into itself through fandom, perpetuating what is probably a misguided view of his personal life.

Again, I am sure he’s had his fair share of fun and I’m not trying to make out that he was always perfect or whatever, but I don’t think he’s been with as many women as the popular discourse would imply and I certainly don’t think he’s in the 4 digit numbers. 

[ridemedaddyjames]

Split - Part IV

Split - Part III

Pairing: Kevin Wendell Crumb x reader

Warnings: angst, cursing, stockholm syndrome

Words: 2,100

“You mean you don’t wanna leave?” Hedwig questioned, completely befuddled by your response, his attention span dwindling again. “Okay, I’ll show you my room,” he shrugged, taking your hand in his as he led you through the complicated maze. When you finally found his room, it seemed to be a well organized mess. Of course, you could never find anything in here, but he had no trouble at all.

“Hedwig, this is your room!?” You exclaimed, smiling widely at how much it truly represented his mind and personality. With everything strewn about, it made it difficult to maneuver through the mess, but he managed to get to the CD player and turn up the music.

“Do you like it? Miss Patricia gets kinda angry when it’s a mess, and Dennis refuses to come in.” Hedwig said, wondering how you’d feel about all of it.

“I think it’s amazing, it really represents you,” and, just like that, you couldn’t stop yourself from grinning like a child. Hedwig always had that affect on you, to make you happy no matter what the situation may be.

“Wanna dance to some Kanye West?” He asked, grabbing you and showing you how to move as he twisted his body into different directions. You tried to mimic him, turning yourself in the same way, but, instead of dancing, you’d just ended up tripping on a pile of toys and clothes.

Hedwig laughed, bending over to help you up. Being the deviant you are, though, you decided to pull him down with you instead. He landed on the pile of clothes, rolling with laughter. “You’re the bestest friend ever,” he said, finally catching his breath as the two of you got up.

“Well, I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you,” you reminded him as you wrapped your arms around him, comfortingly. He held you close, and you could feel him playing with your hair as you giggled.

“Okay, we gotta get back before Mr. Dennis comes, or he’ll be really mad that I let you out. Etcetera,” Hedwig nodded, walking with you back to the room where you were supposed to be being held.

The two of you exchanged one last hug before he disappeared, leaving you alone with your thoughts once again. This time you imagined what it may be like to have kids. Patricia would be the aunt that would spoil them rotten. Hedwig would look at it as having a new friend and twenty-four hour playmate. Dennis would probably see it as a nuisance, and would ask that you keep it contained, and Kevin...Kevin would be the happiest he’s ever been. He would want to prove that he could do it; raise a child without all the problems he had to face growing up. That in itself seemed reason enough to do it, but it was all a fantasy made up in your head, and you realized that when Dennis opened your door and let himself inside.

“I brought you something,” Dennis fidgeted, awkwardly, as he did his best to hide whatever it was behind his back. “Close your eyes, and put out your hands.”

If he’d have said those words to Marcia or Claire they would be screaming with fear, but you could hardly contain the excitement that was coursing through your veins. When you opened your eyes, you found a book resting in your palms. ‘Frankenstein’ you read, feeling an immediate attachment to him as a person with this inanimate object. You ran your fingers over the cover. The pages looked as if it had been read a thousand times, but the binding was so perfect that it seemed to be brand new. This represented how well put together he seemed on the outside, and the story behind those walls; his beautiful disguise. Your eyes lit up at the gesture, your heart racing in your chest.

“I thought you might like something to pass the time. It’s - um - it’s my favorite. You don’t have to read it if you don’t want to, though.” Dennis stated, his Boston accent thicker than usual in part to his nervousness. Tears swelled in your eyes, but you did your best to blink them away, still so awestruck that he had given you something that meant so much to him.

He was being so gentle, and, without even thinking, you leapt from your spot on the small cot to throw your arms around his neck. His hands rested against your waist, taking in the smell of your hair. Dennis was falling for you, and it absolutely terrified him, but you were just as broken as he was, and he couldn’t help but find some sort of comfort in knowing that.

“Dennis, will you dance with me?” You whispered in his ear, feeling his muscles tense at the feeling of your breath on his skin. It had been a weakness of his, and you’d known it from the start. That day he brought you here, asking Marcia to dance with him, you still burned with jealousy that it hadn’t been you in his arms. At first he was hesitant, his fingers landing stiffly against your sides, and you prayed to no one in particular that he would loosen up.

Finally, he moved with you, slowly at first, before the steps had taken on a life of their own. The two of you seeming to follow the same nonexistent rhythm as you danced to nothing at all. By the time you’d finished, you were entirely out of breath, arms around his neck, beaming widely up at him as you felt his chest against yours. You hadn’t realized how close the two of you had been, or how natural it all seemed.

Your insides fluttered, dying to say what was on your mind, but there weren’t enough words to speak how this man made you feel. Which is why you broke the nonexistent barrier, and, without warning, leaned up on your tiptoes to press your lips to his.

Dennis stood there, awkwardly, letting it happen, eyes wide in horror before slowly easing into it. You felt his hand slowly move up your back before holding you closer to him. His other placed, softly, against your cheek. Your eyes fell shut, enjoying every second. Your gut told you that this was wrong, but Gods how it felt so right. This was absolute bliss. This was love.

Suddenly, Dennis pulled away, taking a step back as he put his hands on his hips and stared at the ground. He was thinking, and you wanted to know what went on inside that beautiful mind, until he said something that cut you to your core.

“We can’t,” he realized, breaking the silence. “I shouldn’t have done this, it was a mistake. I can’t get close to you, it’ll only make things harder than they have to be.” He seemed to say it more to himself than to you. Finally, Dennis reached for the door to slam it shut, but you stopped him, taking hold of his thick, bulging, arm, and pressing yourself against him once again.

“Please, please, don’t go. I just,” you stopped, trying to find the words. “I dont want to be alone.”

The hurt in your eyes made him hesitate, and it was that split second of worry that told you he really did care. Before you could stop him, he’d rushed out of the room, leaving you in silence.

Feeling defeated, lost, and alone, you through yourself down on the cot before breaking down in tears. To your surprise, and after what felt like an eternity of sobbing, a soft voice came from the other side of the room. “Y/N, why you cryin?” Hedwig muttered, coming to sit beside you on the tiny bed. You had pulled your legs up to your chest, and, although you hesitated at first, you couldn’t stop yourself from falling into his arms. Hedwig didn’t know how to react, his body going limp compared to the stiffness of Dennis. You rested your head against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. Ultimately, he opted for the safe route as he ran his fingers through your hair, soothingly.

“Is this because of Mr. Dennis? Was he mean to you?” Hedwig finally asked, mustering up the courage to talk to you. “If it is, I told him we’re dating, and that he doesn’t have a chance.”

“Hedwig, I need to tell you something,” you muttered, feeling your heart break once again.

“Wait, wait! Do you like Mr. Dennis?!” Hedwig gasped, unable to comprehend what was happening as he pushed you off of him. “But - but I thought you were my girlfriend?!” He stammered, looking at you like a lost puppy.

“You’re my friend, and I care about you in a different way than I care about him.” You confessed, trying your best to clear up this whole entire situation. “I love you both, just in different ways,” saying it out loud meant finally coming to terms with it, and it only made it hurt worse. Maybe you’d been wrong; maybe Dennis didn’t care about you at all.

“He didn’t pick you! He wanted them. The other girls! You’re mine!” He shouted, bringing you back to reality as your breath caught in your throat. This nine year old had found a way to pour salt in an open wound, and you could feel it eating at you from the inside out.

A heart wrenching sob pulled from your throat, echoing off the walls as you tried to stop yourself from falling apart in front of him. Fuck this, fuck all of it. What made Claire and Marcia so perfect?

Hedwig sat there, fearing what you might do next as the truth soared through your veins like a venomous drug. Your eyes were bloodshot, your throat burned, and you felt like you could never shed another tear, but they still came. “Y/N...do you want me to talk to him? I mean, he doesn’t really listen to me, but I can if you want me to,” Hedwig offered, seeing how hard this was for you. As much as he wanted you for himself, he couldn’t help that he also wanted to make you happy.

“You would do that for me?” You whimpered, wiping the tears from your eyes. There wasn’t a doubt in your mind that you didn’t deserve Hedwig as a friend, he was too kind hearted.

“Of course I would, but, I don’t know what you see in him, I think he’s creepy,” Hedwig shivered, making a disgusted face. It was enough to make you smile, leaning in for a quick hug before he took off.

Part of you hated yourself for what you were about to do, but the other half convinced you that it was okay. So, instead of shredding the book that Dennis had given you, you’d decided to read it instead. With every turn of a page you found yourself falling more in love with him as a person, and understanding why this book mattered to him so much. As your eyes grew heavy, you pulled the book against your chest, cradling it in your arms; which is exactly how you’d fallen asleep.

When you woke up, Dennis was standing over you, arms crossed, breathing heavily. It seemed as if he were contemplating how to go about this whole ordeal. Looking up at him, you were sure your eyes were bloodshot, and you realized your appearance must have been questionable.

“Speak,” he finally ordered, making you jump at how dark his voice was. This was a side of him that you’d rarely seen, and it was starting to make you nervous. It should’ve absolutely terrified you, made you cower beneath him. No, this voice did something entirely opposite. It awoke something in you that you’d never felt before; a burning hunger in your gut that was completely alien to you. You needed him like a moth needed a flame, and like an addict needed a drug. He was your drug. Dennis never made it feel like love, though. No, this was cat and mouse to him. Just another game, and, with your head in the clouds, you couldn’t help but let your mouth flow freely with how you’d been feeling from the moment you were brought here.

“I think I love you,” you muttered, giving it everything you had as you threw all caution to the wind. This was your chance to get exactly what you wanted, pain, and lies, and chaos combined. If he didn’t kill you, the adrenaline of your love for him would.