#ew oh my god thats not okay

[45780]

Pray for Matthew Gray Gubler.

I would say that there is nothing wrong with him but with the amount of bleach I'd wash my mouth out with if I was him he's probably gonna have problems.

Poor boy. He didn't sign up for making out a pile of shit.

[star-mum]

Okay OP nation I have some (maybe controversial) statements about the Straw Hats and I need y’all to listEN FIRST OKAY- HEAR ME OUT

Boyfriend: Zoro and Franky

Husband: Usopp and Sanji

Girlfriend: Nami

Wife: Robin

Luffy: Aroace king

[guttednights]

your bar.

You've worked in the same bar for the past 3 years. It's fairly common for military men to come in and get drinks together. It's always soap, gaz, price, and the one in a mask.

One night you finally speak to the guy in the skull mask. "your name is?" as he looks at you, his cold eyes lighten.

"ghost," he said gruffly when soap elbowed him, he shot soap a glare and sighed making eye contact with you. "Simon. simon Riley." he gruffs.

you can't help but smile. "well then Simon Riley. want your usual?"

"Please," he says coldly

you and your friend spent the rest of the night talking about simon. "god i dont know what it is about him but." "jeez.."

"oh ew! shut up" your friend replies walking to the other side of the bar

you giggle "ah cmon, its not as nasty as you and your thing for that old one.

she giggles. "price is hot because hes a gentle man. simon just looks like he could hurt anyone."

"thats what i like" "feels like hed go to jail for me"

She rolls her eyes "okay mrs delusional."

the next few days some tension between you and simon grew. he cant keep his eyes off you. your literal eyecandy to him. and you notice.

"sarah he keeps staring" you say entering the back to "refill something"

she squeals. "girl hes so into you!"

you roll your eyes, "oh whatever."

Later that night soap walks up to the bar,

"hey y/n, you know my big friend Simon? ya he wants ye number"

your heart practically stops beating. "uh.. yeah sure here" You quickly write it on a napkin and hand it to him. you watch as soap runs away like a schoolgirl giggling to Simon as he hands it to him.

the whole rest of the night you were shocked. The big huffy man you think is hot wanted your number?

around 2 am you jolt awake as your phone buzzes. you grab your phone, its him.

"hey gorgeous its simon, or "big masked man"

"Hi simon" god you cant believe this is happening is this real?

"you should be asleep. what you doing up?"

ur heart flutters, (GOING FERAL LIKE YES PLS BOSS ME AROUND) "couldnt sleep"

"any reason why?"

(yes Simon ur the reason why) "nope no praticular reason why, just one of those nights."

"alright. want to get coffee tomorrow?"

"coffee?!" you think to yourself "Omg it's happening.."

"id love to get coffee"

"great. ill see you at happy cafs tomorrow at 9 am."

"see you there"

your freaking out literally, the man of your literal dreams is asking to go out on a coffee date?! Is it a date..?

"is this considered a date?" you text him a few minutes later

"yes, sweetheart. it's considered a date lol"

you throw your phone across the room screaming and kicking your feet. you can't sleep the rest of the night. too busy thinking about what to wear. finally at 6 am you give up and hit the shower, then walk to your closet. "god do I wear a dress? jeans hoodie?" finally you decide on a long-sleeved black dress, perfect for winter. you straighten your hair, do your makeup, and hype yourself up.

8:55 and you're a minute away from the cafe when u see him pull up. your heart drops. you're so excited yet so nervous, u practically black out until you bump into him.

"op, watch out there" he chuckles, "looking at your feet while you walk sweetheart or?"

you chuckle, "Sorry lost in my thoughts." sweetheart?! You can't help but blush as he puts his hand on the lower part of your back and directs you inside. you both sit down at a booth and a waitress comes over. you both order and wait.

you can't help but stare at him, even tho you haven't seen his face his eyes just capture you.

"I'm not gonna lie, sweetheart,. I can't keep my eyes off you at the bar,"

"might as well claim ye before you are no longer available" he smirks as you blush and look away

you spend the next 3 hours just talking getting to know him. And before you know it, (in a few weeks of course) you are dating, officially his. the man of your dreams is officially yours.

side notes: i dont know if i like this tbh. it feels really long and i almost lost what else to say. if u want a part 2 (MAYBE SMUTTY VERS. i can do it lmk!!!)

[rzyraffek]

Slashers with y/n that just gets along with everything

Like slasher could litteraly kill somone near y/n and she would be like alr alr whats really important is that you are happy🤠😎. Im sorry that first 2character had super long headcanons while last ones have way less :( I had no ideas Request open!

Billy Lenz

He always expects some sort of negative response when he calls people and when he heard new voice on the Phone he got even more exited cuz new person new reaction! He totally didnt expect her to just go "yeah yeah sure buddy, anyways... how is your day man? Cuz im so so tired...*starts normal converstation*

He probably tries to stay in character but he is so caught of Guard he doesnt know how to react really (hehe the table has turn)

Now he kinda hopes that she will pick up cuz shes very intresting😈 billy likey

"Ew its this creep again! He is asking for you y/n? Of please dont tell me you befriended him??" "So what? He said hes favourite fruit is strawberry he cant be that bad!" *billy saying slurs on the phone*

You need to constantly tell him that, no Billy no harrasing women isnt sexy, you arent quirky, you are mentally ill

"Y/n i killed that bitch that was gossiping about you 🧍 " "👍good for you billy im glad you found healthy way to cope with that negative emotion😇" "on god"

His whole moral compass is created around the simple question 'does it hurt y/n?' .1:no it doesnt so feel free to do it .2 do not do it, she will ban Billy from sweets (bad ending)

The man from hush

This guy. This dude. This Little gremlin. He is upset that he gets no reaction! Like please oh please act all angy when he 'acidently' shot tire in her car! But oh no ofc no, she had to be like "oh its okay honey i have backup in garage🥰" hes like HHUH SINCE WHEN WE HAVE GARAGE

Like tbh thats how i imagine how they met: he saw her, he wanted to hunt her, she was so chill that she didnt even leave her household while the power was off and he went inside and just saw her having lil nap on couch. 🧍🤨erm exuse me gurl im trying to roleplay epic hunter here tf

He probably kidnaped her cuz she was too weird to just kill her but he didnt want to risk her calling police. He probably tied her up and yeeted her on backseats. And then she begun judging music on the radio"yo big guy can i get some good music taste?" "What? Whats wrong with Taylor Swift?"

He will overshare everything to kinda check where is her limit if it comes to being chill "yeah so i killed this old lady.." "im sure you had good reason🥰" "🤨... anyways... yeah so i was drinking some redbull when some guy said i look ugly so i shoot his head off and-" "HEY HEY hold up geez you CANT drink Energy drinks?? Bestie you know it is unhealthy?? Also you like hunt for sport it will ruin your condition!? How you gonna shoot people with shakey hands?? You crazy or something?" "Damn😔"

Micheal myers

I tried to put him here but i realised he will be as chill as her.

Like he can give her gifts covered in blood and she' just going to clean it and wear it like nothing happened or completley ignore it

He cares about this stuff as much as y/n so like not at all. I mean tbh theres is a bit of difrence: shes at least positive about it! Like "yeah micheal go for it, love🥰😇 i know its hard to cope with trauma take it all out alr?" Shes trying to be a good supporting gf not her fault she never had serial killer bf!

Brahms Heelshire

He lives for attention! What do you mean the war crime he commited this lunch break is okay!?!? Baby pleasee

But this negativity disapears the moment he realised he can get a lot of positive attention when he will do some nice stuff! "Oh honey I didnt kill any rats today" "oh that's amazing brahms I'm sure you and the rats inside walls will get along well soon🥰" (rats in walls bully brahms)

Please complement him or he will get a tantrum and destroy something

Brahms and rats have very hard past i might do seperate hc about that

Ghostface

"Look babe! My newest victim *shows photo*" "ugh baby...😰 you NEED to buy new camera or watch some youtube tutorials about how to take good photos" "aw man whats wrong with my pictures 😔"

Otherwise y/n supports his hobbies! People need to grow😇 (and he needs to grow up)

If theres 2ghostfaces(like in most movies) they will bet money on how long you gonna keep this 'do whatever as long as youre happy' act. Well they didnt know that this wasnt an act but her personality

Also they will probably try to use this chillnes aginst her like "oooh y/n something terrible happened! I crushed my car oh what will i do!" "Alr bestie i will drive you over there😇" "😈omg you are so nice i totally didnt expect that(heheh i dont need to pay for gas today (hes very evil))

[watercolorofthemoon]

i forced my roommate to watch both LOTR and The Hobbit with me. Here are some highlights

LOTR:

Roomie: I like this gandalf dude Me: Oh yeah me too. he's a bit questionable sometimes but we love him

30 seconds later, gandalf fighting saruman: Roomie: NO MY SKRUNKLY

Roomie: awe sam is a precious boy Me, internally: oh you dont even know the half of it

merry and pippin stealing crops: Roomie: ARE THEY THE BASTARD LITTLE BROTHERS?? me: I mean i gues- Roomie: FOUND FAMILY LETS FUCKING GO

Elrond being disappointed and having strong eyebrows: Roomie: i feel like i've let down my dad and i dont even have a dad

Roomie: i don't really like boromir that much- me, pausing the movie to explain why boromir is extremely valid: I WILL HAVE NO BOROMIR SLANDER Roomie: is this bc he's a himbo

Roomie: this thorin guy sounds pretty gay if he's given bilbo this thing thats worth more than the shire me, internally: YOU HAVE NO IDEA MOTHERFUCKER

gandalf dying: roomie: NO MY BOY

roomie: please tell me gimli and legolas are gay, because everyone else seems extremely straight me: they arguably one of the gayest duos, yes. roomie: oh good. i thought they straight-washed sam for no reason me: i mean. there are a lot of frodo and sam moments that have no heterosexual explanation viggo breaking his toes: me, practically bursting at the seams: roomie: oh god what is it me: DID YOU KNOW-

gandalf is alive: roomie: FUCK YEAH MY BOY

me, explaining the uruk-hai: roomie: fucked up of a yas character to do that tbh (referring to saruman's manicure)

theoden being stubborn at helm's deep: roomie: okay i like him BUT COME ONNN MAN

eowyn picking up merry before they ride to gondor: roomie: I KNOW I WANTED TO KISS HER FOr A REASON MWAH MWAH EOWYN me:...she gets a bf roomie: NOT ANYMORE

aragorn: for frodo roomie, bursting into tears: me: whoa whoa u good roomie: ITS HIS DAD. ITS FRODO'S DAD.

sam literally carrying frodo up a mountain: roomie:...thats a bit gay mount doom blowing up: roomie: thats unecessary and homophobic

frodo sailing to the undying lands: roomie: TAKE YOUR BOYFRIEND WITH YOU YOU COWARD

The Hobbit:

the scene with baby bilbo: roomie: NAUR I LOVE HIM

bilbo and gandalf interacting as adults: roomie: this feels like it could go very wrong thorin finally showing up: roomie: listen im gay but i'd consider it me: he's probably also gay roomie: mlm and wlw solidarity okay we're bffs now

bilbo running out of the door: roomie: again. this feels like this could go very wrong. me, internally: oh fuck how do they KNOW already

thorin throwing down his weapon bc bilbo got caught by trolls: roomie:....thats....sus. me:...if this is sus...oh boy...

thorin's obvious dislike of elves @ rivendell: roomie: okay so. explain to me why thorin doesn't like elves again- me: did you not watch the entire introduction to thorin? roomie: NO WAIT I REMEMBER THE BLOND BITCH

saruman showing up: roomie: ew.

galadriel showing up: roomie: HELLO SAILOR AWOOGA AWOOGA

bilbo and thorin nearly falling off at the mountain pass: thorin: he's been lost ever since he stepped out his front door roomie: WDYM YOU'RE ALL FUCKED UP- thorin stop being mean to your husband

the entirety of the goblin tunnels and gollum: roomie: this does not bode well. at all. the ring showing up: roomie: I WAS RIGHT

azog versus thorin scene: roomie: dumb bitch...OH NO DOES HE DIE- bilbo to the rescue: oh no its chill, just gay

the iconic carrock scene: roomie:....this is incredibly gay bestie me: i'm aware.

the entirety of the beorn's house arc: roomie: ...i like beorn. he's feral and skrunkly. so is radaghast.

legolas showing up: roomie: *surprised pikachu face*

tauriel and kili's interactions: roomie: damn i was hoping she would be gay me: i mean with the right headcanons she can totally be a lesbian roomie: UR SO RIGHT OMG

kili getting shot with arrow: roomie: NO THE GAYS-

the laketown master existing: roomie: EAT THE RICH.

bilbo and thorin on the boat together: roomie: oh they definitely fucked in laketown-

tauriel healing kili and them holding hands: roomie: oh no don't make me feel sad for straight ppl me: again. they don't have to be straight. roomie: I KNOW BUT ITS THE PRINCIPLE OF IT

bilbo waking up smaug: roomie: oh bilbo...oh you sweet summer child...you stupid bitch.

thorin threatening bilbo initially: roomie: oh fuck. it got worse. me, internally: oh honey. oh no.

thorin's gold sickness and then nearly killing bilbo at the ramparts: roomie: NO THEY WERE SUPPOSED TO BE GAY AND HAPPY HOW COULD YOU

*doesn't say anything almost the entire battle until the kili and fili die* roomie: noooo the skrunklies NOOOOOOO

thorin, fucking dies in bilbo's arms: roomie: *turns to look at me with the most murderous look on her face* me: *nervous laughter* so about it getting worse- roomie: IM GOING TO KILL YOU.

end for now, if we end up watching trop together ill let yall know <3

[stupd000]

My typed reaction of Vegas BA bc everyone’s asleep

I love the guy who checks us in

Oh um don’t call me pet

Ermmmmm

Okay don’t like it so far

aw shucks i missed you too boo

no i will not come closer

ew no go away

oh nvm ig we are

wait so are we the dog or is he

okay this is getting boring

can we fuck now

oh wait nvm this is hot

oh WE’RE the puppy

that’s um

okay

is he calling me special

no i’m not ready to play VEGA.

i have a feeling we’re not alone

or we are

idk

okay we got some vouyers

that’s erm

okay

don’t call me pet

weirdo

excitement? no honey i’m scared

yes fear

ok can we fuck now

damn he talks a lot

stop echoing

oh don’t call me pup

oh this is some like

kinky kinky shit

how big is Vega

just in general cuz i thought he was like

6,1 and scrawny

um no my breath is oxygen not yours

this is definitely um

yeah

correct circumstances?

wardrobe?? bitch what is this Narnia

DONT CALL ME A PUPPY THATS WEIRD

i’m kink shaming

I am not getting on all fours what the fuck

oh nvm ig we are

this is uncomfortable

TAIL????

this is some furry shit

UM ..!

NO I WILL NOT CRAWL

WHATTTTTT

ASS?

SLUT???

this would be hot if i wasn’t a fucking dog

don’t shush me bitch

are we still on all fours

that’s mad embarrassing

i am not yours

weirdo

I’d rather you not take care of me

this is very um

interesting!!

Do we have dignity

STOP CALLING ME PUPPY YOU FURRY

do we have any pride at all like oh my god

GRINDING???

Don’t slut shame me bitch

arching????????

oh my god.

CUM HUNGRY LITTLE BITCH????

if he says puppy one more time i’m killing myself

if he puts a fucking collar on me i’ll jump

stop

STOPPP

Dog tag is crazy

“property of vega” NO.

Stop vega this is not a joke

DO WE HAVE NO SENSE OF DIGNITY

OH MY GODDDD

PROUD??? I AM NOT PROUD

OWNER???

I’m jumping off a ledge

MY HOLE?? WHICH ONE I HAVE LIKE 3

Okay stop slut shaming me Vega

ROLL OVER???

i’m insanely uncomfortable

by the way guys i made chicken alfredo today

Anyway

i hate his fucking tone

don’t take that attitude w me bitch

DO NAWTTT CALL ME A WHORE EVER AGAIN.

oh wait he called me pretty nvm

this is insane

it’s 2:30 am i cannot handle this

okay so we archin

PUT WHAT IN

WHAT IS GOING IN

this is strange

CALLING UR DICK A TREAT IS WILDDD

oh my god no

stop.

A TAIL???

NO

NO NO NO NO

NO

NO

no wait cuz there was this one kid who wore a butt plug tail to school it was crazy bc a guy pulled it out

anyway

This is some furry shit

not that there’s anything wrong w that live ur truth

STRETCHING???

the plug is insane

stop

i’m actually sobbing this is NOT OKAY.

what position are they in im so confused

SHAKE WHAT ASS

UMMMMMMMMM

this is peculiar

Vega is a furry

i hate this

i hate this sm

I STILL HAVE 10 MINS LEFT

LORD SAVE ME

okay no need to take that tone Vega😒

bitch we can’t breathe wtf

no i wont whine around that tootsie roll u call a dick

AHHH THE NOISESSS

okay can u not choke me

don’t call me a slut you cunt

oh my god hurry up vega

ew

I don’t love anything about this

this is insane

NOT A PERSON????

RUDEEEEEEEE

okay adjective king

ew don’t call me that

i am not licking the floor sir

i am not licking your boot either

lick your own fucking boot

this is actually pissing me off he’s annoying

are we almost done

Do we have no sense of shame

like at all

second hand embarrassment

okay are we done

no? okay

ew don’t call ur self master

that’s not..

okay

um

the growling is insane

damn right i’m divine

ew don’t call the that

not the baby voice

stop this madness

what do you want from me WHAT DO U WANNTTTT

okay are we done

TWITCHING?????? INSANE.

That was horrible

[goldenempyrean]

Stubborn As Ever

〚 Notes - First Marina fic :D Hopefully you enjoy <3 I loved writing these two so if you've got any ideas, send em over! 〛

〚 Pairing- Maya Bishop x Carina DeLuca 〛

〚 Summary - Maya is sick at work, Carina comes to take her home. 〛

〚 Wordcount - 1900 〛

〘 Check Out My Masterlist! 〙

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“Bishop.” A loud voice echoed through the bunks as a very annoyed looking Herrera looked down from the balcony, her on her hips, “Don’t you dare start an epidemic in this station.” 

Maya sniffled, titling her head to look up at her, “I’m fine Andy.” She grumbled, sniffling loudly before quickly wiping her nose on her sleeve. 

“You’re fooling nobody.” 

Herrera's expression softened as she descended the steps, concern etched across her features as she came face to face with the pale blonde, “You look sooo healthy Bishop, so very not sick.” The sarcasm was thick in her voice but her tone all sympathy. 

This was bound to happen eventually. It was Winter - prime cold and flu season. In fact they’d already dropped off two patients at Grey Sloan earlier after they’d presented dehydration and flu symptoms. 

Of course it was just an occupational hazard. Just another part of the job. And while most of the crew did have pretty good immune systems, eventually everyone gets sick somehow. This was Maya’s turn. 

“You have a fever estúpida.” Andy sighed, the back of her palm pressed against her best friend’s forehead, whistling through her teeth at the heat radiating from her, “God you’re as stubborn as ever.” Maya only groaned in reply, waving her hand dismissively but she could protest further, a sudden sneeze had her jolting forwards, catching both of them off guard. 

Herrera’s face twisted as she jumped back in surprise, “Oh Maya! Ew!” She shook her head, “I’m literally covered in your-  ugh, just, never mind. You’re going home, right now. You hear me?” 

Her voice held the ‘don’t you dare argue with me right now or I will make your life hell’ tone, one Maya didn’t have the strength or will to argue with right now. Instead, the blonde simply nodded, allowing Andy to pull her up as she walked her to the front desks. 

“Sit.” A tissue box was stolen from another desk and swiftly placed in front of Maya as she sat down in one of the swivelling chairs, “I’ll call Carina, alright? I doubt your wife will forgive me if I let you keel in the streets over while trying to stumble home.” 

Maya sniffled again, reaching for the tissue box and blowing her nose loudly. She winced at the sound, feeling utterly drained as she leaned back in the chair. Andy hovered nearby, worry etched on her face as she dialled Carina's number. 

It was picked up after only two rings, “Hello? Hi Carina, it’s Andy.” Herrera began explaining the situation and that Maya definitely needed to be taken home. 

“Yeah, she’s here with me right now.” She looked down just in time to see Maya’s head bob down into a crumpled handful of tissues, sneezing twice in rapid succession, “Yup, thats her. Are you sure? Okay, thank you so much. That’s great. We’ll see you soon.” 

“She’s coming to pick you up.” The brunette smiled as she set the phone down back on the retriever. Maya simply nodded before muffling a deep cough into her arm, “You really don’t do things by half do you? Come here, let me check your actual temp’ please.” 

“I was fine earlier.” The firefighter groaned in response, slumping back in the chair. Andy rolled her eyes and reached down to grab the thermometer from the first aid kit they kept beneath the desk. “Vic’s already out, I need to be here.” Maya continued to mumble. 

“The difference is Vic actually told us she wasn’t feeling well when she felt this coming on and you had to sense to send her home. So, when did you feel this coming on, hm? Because I’m betting it’s been a few hours. Now, come on, turn this way for me.”  

She did so - reluctantly.  As she turned to the side, Andy slotted the thermometer into her ear and pressed down the button. It beeped once and they waited a few moments for the second beep. 

As the device beeped again, Andy glanced at the reading, her brows furrowing slightly. "Well, congratulations, Captain. You've officially joined the ranks of the feverish.” She let her hand move to gently rub her shoulder, “She’ll be here soon.” 

As Maya sat there, feeling increasingly miserable, she couldn't help but sneeze again, the force of it causing her to double over slightly. Andy frowned sympathetically, handing her another tissue before reassuringly patting her on the back. 

Just then, the sound of the door opening signalled Carina's arrival. She entered the room with concern etched on her face, quickly assessing Maya's condition. 

“Oh Mai, you look so ill.” Her was soft as she quickly came to the firefighter’s side, “How are you feeling amore mio?” 

Andy watched with a soft smile, watching as her best friend’s-tired eyes slowly grew more awake. She discreetly slipped away to go and gather Maya’s things, giving the two of them a moment of privacy. 

Maya managed a weak smile up at Carina, her eyes watery as she struggled through a chesty cough. "Not great," She admitted, voice strained as she spoke, “Sorry for making you come all the way here just to collect me.” 

“Shh, none of that.” Carina soothed her gently, reaching out to cup her cheeks, “Oh, bambina you are so hot.”  

She moved her hands to press her hand to her girlfriend’s forehead, sighing softly before pressing a gentle kiss to her fever flushed skin. 

“Her temperature’s 101.7.” Herrera chimed in as she came back from collecting Maya’s bags. 

“101.7? That’s…uh, around 38 and a half? Si?” Carina mumbled to herself, still trying to get used to converting to the imperial system. It was one of the many American things she still hadn’t quite gotten used to yet. 

“Poor girl, let’s get you home then bambina, hm?” The Italian purred, offering out her hand to help her girlfriend up from the chair she’d been slumped in, “There’s a nice bed waiting for you when we’re back.” 

“Mmh’bed does sound good right now.” Maya sniffled loudly as she gave into the temptation of climbing into bed and getting cuddles from her beyond amazing girlfriend.  

“You know protocol Bishop, you’re not back in here until at least 24 hours after that fever breaks.” Andy smiled as she held the door open for the two of them. Nodding in mutual understanding as Carina thanked her quietly. 

Luckily Carina hadn’t parked far away, only round the corner. The two of them walked together, Maya taking slow unsteady steps as she swayed before the doctor noticed and put her around her waist. As she did so, she didn’t miss the way Maya shivered as the cold, winter air nipped against her bare skin. “Come here sweetheart, that’s better.” She murmured, taking off her thick cardigan to pull it around her girlfriend’s shoulders instead. 

“It’s- I don’t need this Carina- It’s cold, you need to be warm too.” Maya began to protest but her pleads fell on dead ears. There wasn’t much point to them now anyway, they’d reached Carina’s car already. 

As she helped get Maya settled in the passenger seat, Maya couldn't suppress the itching in her sinuses and suddenly ducked down into her elbow with a series of harsh sneezes, each one followed by an apologetic sniffle. "Sorry, Car’. I promise I'm not doing this on purpose," She looked away, not wanting to make eye contact. Being sick was still something she’d yet to adapt to. Her father’s lessons were still as clear as they’d ever been about that. Eyes forward. Embrace the pain. 

The doctor looked over with sad eyes, pouting as the firefighter sniffled miserably into the sleeve of her borrowed clothes, “Salute bambina. I promise you don’t have to apologise for anything. You’re human, it’s only natural and you can’t control it.” Her voice was soft, but the teasing tone was unmissable as she nudged her lightly, “There’s tissues in the compartment, don’t get your germs on my favourite cardi’ please.” 

Maya raised an eyebrow fondly as she chuckled, well, to be honest it was more of the beginning of a laugh being immediately proceeded by a round of deep coughing. 

Carina murmured something worriedly in Italian as she glanced over at her wife, it was hard not to notice how tired and pale she still looked, despite the warmth of the cardigan wrapped around her shoulders. 

“We’ll get you home, okay?” She reached over to squeeze the blonde’s thigh, “Just sit tight bella.” 

It didn’t take long to reach home. Mainly because Carina had driven at slightly irresponsible speeds. Despite the short journey, it had been long enough for the firefighter’s eyes start to close on their own, her head bobbing forward as Carina pulled into their driveway. 

“Sleepy girl.” Carina murmured, her voice laced with tenderness, trying to rouse her from her drowsiness, “We’re home sweetheart.” 

Maya stirred slightly, blinking groggily as she looked around, momentarily disoriented before remembering where they were. "Home?” She mumbled; her voice thick with exhaustion. 

Carina smiled softly, unbuckling her seatbelt before leaning over to help Maya with hers. "That's right, let's get you inside where you can rest properly," she said, her tone soothing as she opened the car door. 

Maya nodded weakly, allowing Carina to assist her as she stepped out of the car, her legs feeling like jelly beneath her. She sniffled weakly against the brunette’s shoulder as she guided her inside. She murmured something intelligible before legs buckled under her that. Luckily, Carina had been ready, and she carefully scooped Maya into her arms, cradling her gently as she carried her bridal style towards their room. 

Reaching their bedroom, Carina gently laid Maya down on their bed, tucking her in with extra blankets to keep her warm. Maya curled up instinctively, seeking comfort in the softness of their shared sheets. 

"I'll make you some tea, amore," Carina said softly, pressing a tender kiss to Maya's forehead before heading to the kitchen. 

Minutes later, Carina returned with a tray holding a steaming mug of herbal tea and a bowl of soup. She placed it on the bedside table and sat beside Maya, gently stroking her hair. 

"Here, drink this. It'll help you feel better," Carina said, offering her the mug, rubbing her back soothingly as she drank the hot liquid, “That’s better, si?” 

She nodded, letting herself relax into the pillows, “Much.” Maya sniffled, rubbing her hand beneath her nose as it twitched. She just managed to set her cup aside before a sudden bout of sneezing overtook her, each one accompanied by a soft, sleepy sound. Carina chuckled softly, reaching for a tissue to gently dab at Maya's nose. 

“Bless you, amore," she murmured, reaching for a tissue to dab at Maya's nose tenderly, "Looks like someone's still feeling a bit under the weather." 

Maya sniffled, her eyes fluttering open briefly before she buried herself deeper into the warmth of the blankets. "Sorry," she whispered, her voice hoarse with fatigue, "I can't pull myself together.” 

Carina's expression softened further as she continued to stroke Maya's hair soothingly, “You don’t need to pull anything, you just lay there and rest. Just rest now, bella, that’s all. I'll be right here if you need anything," Carina murmured, pressing a soft kiss to her warm forehead, before snuggling in beside her, wrapping a comforting arm around Maya’s front, “Thank you for letting me take you home bambina.” 

〖 Join My Taglist! 〗@scrambled-brain-eggs natashamyl0ve @observeowl @bloomingflowersthings @lots-of-pockets @somber-sapphic @kathleenmikaelson @shamelessbearunknown @inluvwithfictionalwomen @kljhsong @santana1437 @lovelyy-moonlight @natashamaximoff69 @natashamyl0ve  @wandanats-goodgirl @nuianced-tck-enby @maomaoincomming @anne-lister @inluvwithfandom 

[I tagged for every person that asked to be for "everyone" let me know if you'd like it removing!]

[pleasingforharry]

Michelle Randolph

-

yourinstagram

liked by yoursister, y/nfan1, and 392,481 others

yourinstagram your local cat lady

view all 12,187 comments

y/nfan1 you want another cat? I can meow

yoursister gremlins

yourinstagram frankster bit you ONCE

harryfan1 which one is Harry’s fav?

yourinstagram the one in the middle

-

harrystyles

liked by yourinstagram, niallhoran, and 4,937,103 others

harrystyles selfrry

view all 213,381 comments

yourinstagram THE CAPTION WAS MY IDEA

harryfan1 STOP HES SO

harryfan2 no because why does she know about the rry’s??

yourinstagram pls baby you’re so cuteeeee

harrystyles Thank you.

yourinstagram ew stop, I feel like I just made a business deal with you

y/nfan1 y/nnnnn hahshshahah

yourinstagram show your face imposter!

-

yourinstagram

liked by harrystyles, harryfan1, and 934,927 others

yourinstagram boyfriend for sale

view all 193,472 comments

harryfan1 noo what did he do??

yourinstagram I don’t wanna talk about it

harrystyles I love you. Take me back.

yourbff she’s mine now

y/nfan1 it’s okay, you were too hot for a boyfriend

harrystyles Y/N, I told you they only had grape flavor left. I’m sorry.

yourinstagram I want your stuff gone by morning

-

yourbff

liked by harryfan1, harryfan2, and 382,102 others

yourbff they’re fine. stop bothering me now

view all 43,857 comments

yourinstagram pause I’m a hot kisser what??

y/nfan1 I need proof, kiss me

harryfan1 thank you for your service yourbff

yourbff no problem babe

yoursister the most dramatic couple ever

yourinstagram I know where you live

-

harrystyles

liked by y/nfan1, yourbff, and 2,938,735 others

harrystyles “I think I’m Snow White.”

view all 103,473 comments

yourinstagram but I think I ammmmmm

yoursister nah you’re that witch lady

harrystyles Noooooo

y/nfan1 beautiful hairrr

harryfan1 he’s sucking up now hahah

yourinstagram I figured

-

yourinstagram

liked by yourbff, harryfan1, and 1,384,102 others

yourinstagram spent the night with this one. 

view all 271,854 comments

harrystyles you make my nights so much better. i’m so honored to be your boyfriend. i’m a loser without you. y/n will you marry me?

harrystyles Stop hacking me.

yourinstagram TMZ is gonna eat this shit up ;)

TMZ Breaking news!

yourinstagram what did i tell you...

y/fan1 OMG Y/N

yourbff GIRL WHAT WAS THAT??

yourinstagram harry’s confession of his love for me?

-

yourbff

liked by yoursister, y/nfan1, and 382,917 others

yourbff she’s a fiancée :) yourinstagram

view all 71,395 comments

yourinstagram my maid of honor

yourbff yayyyy

yoursister took her long enough

yourinstagram babe you’re single..???

y/nfan1 I love this inside joke hahahsha

yourbff what inside joke??

y/nfan2 OH GOD

-

TMZ

liked by harryfan1, y/nfan1, and 5,839,294 others

TMZ It’s confirmed! Singer harrystyles and his girlfriend, yourinstagram, are now a newly engaged couple. Congrats to them!

view all 836,184 comments

yourinstagram WAIT IT WAS A JOKE HELPPP

yourbff NO NO NO WAIT

harrystyles They look so in love. Congrats to them.

yourinstagram I hate you.

yourinstagram honestly it should be ‘hot Netflix binge-watcher expert Y/N and her boyfriend, Harry’ but thats just me

harrystyles Agreed, darling.

-

Idk why I had so much fun with this one ahahha

[franklespine]

Okay 15.14 had some genuinely interesting ideas and developments... just wrapped in the stupidest packaging known to man. But whatever, I have a great imagination.

Why did the things about Jack go kind of hard tho - that whole thing with him being a monster that Ms Butters thinks they should get rid of...... okay Ms tortured to indoctrination pipeline. But her calling Jack the infecting snake from the garden of eden who corrupts those around him erased any doubts in my mind. Genuinely a crazy line. Especially since Jack has literally just come back from the garden of eden too?? Also Jack calling for Sam after first finding the tape of Ms Butters, only to then give it up cause Sam is about to go on a date for the first in FOREVER - RAHHHFDNVIHUR the way he went to Sam because he knew he would listen, believe and help him but in the end decided against it because he didn't want Sam to give up this brief experience of something happy and normal .... their bond means so much to me. And oh my god Jack asking Dean when they're both in the dungeon if he still thinks he's a monster....... oooo now this is the stuff I want to be seeing. Yeah Dean lets reflect on you saying that to new born Jack. But I actually appreciate Dean telling him the truth in this scene, being like look I'm really trying to mend our relationship here but there are some things that are really difficult to move past - but that doesn't mean I'm going to let you get taken out. But I mean, as if Sam, Dean and Cas haven't done things 1000000000000x worse than accidentally killing someone whilst they were soulless, but I have accepted the fact that consistency doesn't exist in spn and sometimes you just have to look at things in a vacuum. Whatever. And despite that Dean still believes in him to save the world 😭😭.

Also I did not need that close up shot of Sam's nail-less finger ew lmao why did they do that like ik it was torn off I don't need a 360 viewing experience of it.

Ugh no but Sam and Jack really got me in this episode. See Sam has an endless vault of forgiveness in his heart and its jsut so obvious he really does just love and care about him so much eughhh.

Also another thing - there is something so underlyingly sinister about the old MOL and I love it tbh its so interesting. Like the monster radar table thing, there is just something so morally corrupt in its convenience. Like we see Sam and Dean use it to kill the 'nest' of vampires (I say that in inverted commas cause 1. there were only two of them and 2. were they really that much of a threat??). Like machine that tracks down monsters for you... you go and exterminate them.... its giving guilty until proven innocent... except there is no proving of innocence cause its just storm in and kill them. Like idk... its not like they chose to be vampires and tbh they seemed pretty chill. Like it showed them drinking blood from blood bags so I can only assume thats probably where they get their food from and its like... that's literally the most ethical way you can be a vampire. Like idk I just feel like there are bigger issues in society but whatever I'm not going to go into the incredibly interesting implications of the victim -> monster pipeline that most monsters follow at 1am in the morning.

But yeah anyway I think that was supposed to be the point tho - like yeah using a monster tracking device to kill them before theyve even done anything wrong is a morally wrong thing -> OG MOL were kind of this crazy secret society that lowkey lacked any morals at all and kidnapped this wood nymph and torture brainwashed her by taking advantage of her innate nature to protect her family to turn her into some kind of house maid guard dog. Freaky.

Anyway. I have given up trying to predict the trajectory of these episodes lmao.

[underworld-park-offical]

CRAIG: If I tell you CRAIG: Do you promise to not…. CRAIG: Y'know  CRAIG: KILL them

PIP: Absolutely not, and you are in no position to negotiate. CRAIG: Shit… CRAIG: Fine CRAIG: Last time I saw him he ran out of class screaming “THE GAYS! THE GAYS ARE GONNA KILL ME!!” like hes Jennifer fucking Coolidge GREGORY: I hate to interrupt but has my nail chipped? PIP: SHUT UP GREGORY GREGORY: But Sir Pip- PIP: SHUT. UP. GREGORY: I cannot believe you're insulting me with all those clashing colors in your outfit PIP: …. PIP: …. PIP: Gregory? PIP: Would you like to repeat what you said? PIP: I didn't hear you loud enough GREGORY: Uhm, you're a slut? PIP: …. PIP: …. PIP: …. GREGORY: Sorry wrong person PIP: It better have been!

THOMAS: We shouldn't fight in front of him THOMAS: Especially not about our plan CRAIG: What plan? CRAIG: What's going on here? PIP: Gregory? GREGORY: (claps) CRAIG: Woahhhh… this is such a slay moment right now PIP: Thank you CRAIG: Hey you guys wanna say hi to my blog guys? PIP: No, Gregory? We’ll be leaving. Thomas, Tweek,  THOMAS AND TWEEK: Yes? PIP: Watch over the human, will you?

CLYDE: I have to take a mean shit right now

TOLKIEN: Are you serious?

TOLKIEN: You could’ve gone in the woods

CLYDE: They don't have big boobie chick magazines in the woods

TOLKIEN: Oh my god babe

CRAIG: Eugh CRAIG: Goo hands are NOT a slay CRAIG: Feels like ink in slime CRAIG: Nasty ass hoe THOMAS: Why did we have to go on babysitting duty? THOMAS: This sucks… CRAIG: Omg not you hating right now lmao TWEEK: I know, I wish Estella was here TWEEK: She’s at least somewhat tolerable CRAIG: Estellas kind of an ugly name ngl

TOLKIEN: Go in the bathrooms

TOLKIEN: You’ll probably find weed in there

CLYDE: God I need weed right now

TOLKIEN: Pick me up some if you find any, okay?

CLYDE: Okay baby

TOLKIEN: Love you

CLYDE: Love you too.

THOMAS: Don’t talk shit she's our friend  TWEEK: I just remembered why I hate you, Tucker. CRAIG: ARE YOU TRYING TO CANCEL ME RIGHT NOW??? CRAIG: YOU WANNA FUCKING GO??? THOMAS: Ack- FUCK-!! SHIT-!!! THOMAS: WRONG PERSON!!! CRAIG: FUCK YOU YOURE FRIENDS WITH THE TWITCHY FUCKER CRAIG: YOU'RE ALL OUT TO CANCEL ME RN TWEEK: JESUS CHRIST CALM DOWN CRAIG: NO! FUCK YOU! TWEEK: FUCK YOU! THOMAS: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

CLYDE: Are we there yet?

TOLKIEN: Almost babe

CLYDE: Thank god

CLYDE: My IBS is acting up right now

TOLKIEN: You better not have shit in my car

CLYDE: I tried my hardest!

TOLKIEN: Ugh…

CLYDE: YOU KNOW I CAN'T CONTROL MY BOWELS!!

TOLKIEN: I know, I know

TOLKIEN: You at least wore a diaper today, right? CLYDE: Yeah I think so

???: What hol’ up

???: Clyde wears diapers?

???: Hoooooly shit thats so funny

CRAIG: What the fuck why am I crying rn? CRAIG: This is not a slay moment… THOMAS: A… are you okay? CRAIG: Literally no CRAIG: Why the fuck are you asking? THOMAS: I dunno… THOMAS: I'm just… SHIT-!!! Worried about you….SHIT-!!! COCK-!! CRAIG: I swear on my Yeezys… CLYDE: (sniffling)

TOLKIEN: Don’t make fun of my boyfriend, Daimen. 

TOLKIEN: He has IBS

CLYDE: Yeah I have IBS

DAIMEN: That doesn't mean it's not absolutely hilarious

TOLKIEN: We’ve also been through a lot

DAIMEN: Did you guys finally break up? TOLKIEN: What? No

TOLKIEN: I literally could never

CLYDE: Awww…

TOLKIEN: We’ve encountered some… uh….

TOLKIEN: Demons? DAIMEN: Some what?

TOLKIEN: Demons

CRAIG: Like and subscribe!! Like and subscribe!!  Like and subscribe!! Like and subscribe!! THOMAS: Is- THOMAS: Is he okay??? TWEEK: His friends told me it's his panic reflex THOMAS: WHAT???? TWEEK: Pretty sure he’s having an episode CRAIG: What are you doing in my swamp?  What are you doing in my swamp?  What are you doing in my swamp?  What are you doing in my swamp? What….are you….. doing…. in my….. CRAIG: In…. my…. CRAIG: (Sobbing) TWEEK: Yeah, he's … TWEEK: Oh satan.. THOMAS: What is he doing? TWEEK: I think it's what humans call…. TWEEK: “The Griddy”? THOMAS: Oh THOMAS: Ew

DAIMEN: What kinds of demons are we talking about?

DAIMEN: Not the queer kind like my husband, right?

TOLKIEN: That depends on what your husband looks like

DAIMEN: Oh god damnit

(Edits made by @pissblanket)

[tableintheteacherslounge]

Abbott Elementary S03E09 thoughts

Janine come home the kids miss you (I’m the kids)

Work wives cold open okay I’m winning - I want to see the rehearsals of the hand game and know the lore of barlissa both knowing it - do they play it together? (Or are their handgames something different)

Courtney’s growing up 🥺😖

JA’BRIA oh my god get it baby

“Do i eat it like i did last time” 😭

“You’re colouring a carrot” ate him UP

“Am i being fiîíįred?” See this is why quinta has an Emmy

Still obsessed with keegan michael key being here

JANINE PLEASE DO NOT TAKE IT was my initial thought, but I think (hope) it being introduced before the season finale means she’s gonna change her mind

“Mrs Howard cold as hell” IJBOL

The AI subplot is so funny and like relevant yk I like it

I also like the work wives of it all

Ew melissa calling barb ‘barbara’ always feels wrong

“7 absences thats not too bad” “Plus today” “8? Thats very bad” 😭😭

Barb why are u proud not heartbroken ur daughter is leaving (ok i get she’s prpud of Janine’s growth but)

Pretending not to care while crying is SO Melissa 😭😭

Melissa pulling barb into the group hug 😣🫶

Barb laughing at pussyfooted 🏳️‍🌈🌈

Barlissa trying to get jacob to talk is so cute - I love work moms

I feel like these phone calls are part of the reason s3 feels stilted

As a brit I was lost at the whole ‘we cant do anything to get alex to show’ situation when we have attendance officers in schools, the ‘peril’ greg and janine would face didnt land because it doesn’t work like that here

The jellybean belt 😭😭

After we’ve been reminded 567 times that going to alexs house is strictly against policy will it stop janine getting the job or will there be zero consequences

“What?” “What?!” “She said shes working full time at the district” 😭😭😭

Me 🤝 barlissa - defending mr johnson

“Most of the toilets in this joint running some of the time” LMAOOO

“And u wouldve known that if u read my news letter u IGNORANT FOOL” ijbol 😭

Teddie having a domestic and having to be broken up by alex’s little ‘hello?’ 😭😭 aww ☹️

One thing about the abbott characters they will not stay on topic

Janine’s reasoning with alex 🥹🥺 she’s such a good teacher 😭😭

Greg doesnt want janine to be someone who comes and goes 😖😖😖

JANINE TAKING TIME TO THINK BC OF GREGORY IKTR TEDDIE FTW

Ok why did this feel like 3 minutes when I first watched it, I was like ok where’s the rest

Teddie is SO BACK come on yearning

When will melissa admit she misses janine

Janine is NOT taking that job, but when will she fully realise that herself?

Oh and the ava plot line eh i didnt really care, but lbr ava, u love janine deep down

[icetobes]

a rollercoaster of fucking emotions

911 thoughts s7 e5

- HAND MAN

- alien hand ?? lmao

- hen and her knowlate 🫶🏻

- lmao pleasee they’re struggling so much lmao

- oh bucks being choked

- bobby 🫶🏻

- oh eddie… um

- HES CHOKING BUCK AGAIN ??? oh dear

- kinda funny… those poor guys

- HENREN 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻 MOTHERSSSS

- THEYRE GETTING A LITTLE GIRL

- i’m so excited this is aaaa

- NO WHAT 😭😭😭

- they’re ??? not ??? getting a little girl ????

- i’m devastated they can’t do this to me i was so excited why would they do this to me

- another girl ?? a nine year old :((((

- they’re the best chance :((( aaa

- THE DATE OH MY GOD

- HERE WE GO

- they’re going to a movie 🥹🥹

- evan.

- HES SO AAA

- the 118 was a regressive place… you did that ngl but it’s okay

- “i’m not lying” BUCK BABY

- “date with a dude” 😭

- A RAINBOE ON HIS INSTA HES SO CUTE 😭😭

- “i guess it’s just me that makes you nervous” IM GONNA AAAA

- HOT CHICKS buck stop ??? help

- SHES MOVING IN ??? HELP MEEEE NOOOO

- EW I CANT

- CLOSET SPACE “right evan” IM GONNA DIE

- he’s so awkward :(((

- “it’s mine”

- “i think you’re adorable but i don’t think you’re ready” IM SOBBING NO

- BABY BUCK NO PLEASE IM SNSOSBSKSBSSI I CANT DO THIS

- aaaa henren again 🥹🫶🏻

- the blanket is the only thing she has left :((

- hen understanding non-verbal i’m going to CRY

- denny is so sweet im aaaaa

- karen getting emotional me too babe

- THE TEDDY AAAA 🥹🥹🥹

- lied to eddie…

- BUCK

- a date…

- he’s not saying it…

- OUTNOF THE WAY

- “this person” he’s so 🫶🏻

- a MARRIED WOMAN IM SO

- “who it is isn’t the point”

- “HE”

- BACK GO THE PRONOUN

- IM AN ALLY BUCK STOP

- “more than an ally”

- “didn’t think that’s where you’re interests lie” eddie diaz

- CHEKC OUT A HOT GUYS ASS

- “EDDIES FRIEND”

- he came out to maddie… kinda im shaking

- THE HOT PILOT BAOSBSOSDB

- eddie and … her… ew

- IM GONNA DIE I CANT DO THIS

- STOP THAT

- i need him to find something dumb

- THE CACTUS “you’re kinda cool” he’s a loser i love him

- A NUN ??? NO WAY SHES ACTUALLY A NUN

- SHUT THE GUCK IP THATS SO FUNNY

- HES QUESTIONING HIS WHOLE LIFE

- IMAGINING HER AS A NUN I CANT IM CRYING

- karen 🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻🫶🏻

- oh the teddy bear:(

- mara are you okay :((

- oh she’s :(( poor baby :((

- buck at the stationnn

- EDDIE IN THE GYM

- GYM SCENE GYM SCENE

- “you are here early” buck you are literally so awkward

- a avoid not having sex ??? what

- CATHOLIC GUILT OH MY GOD YOURE DAY

- “SHE WAS A NUN” “oh”

- he’s so angry about her past as a nun im crying

- not the cross help…

- GO TO CAP 😭😭😭

- “you looked like you wanted to tell me something” uh

- hen and bobby time

- talk about mara :((

- that poor baby :(

- i hope she realises she’s safe she deserves it

- oh denny :( he’s so sweet i can’t

- karen kinda side eyeing her… don’t make me dislike you :(

- her blanket is her safety net 😭🫶🏻

- “this isn’t working out” NO YOU GOTTA MAKE HER SAFE

- i need this storyline to work out good it’s got to i need this

- BOBBBY TALKING TO EDDIEEE

- second thoughts about moving in BOBBY YOU ARE GOOD

- panic attacks mention

- a commitment phobe

- SHANNON

- demisexual eddie diaz i WILL have you one day

- “only you know that” but i don’t think he does tho

- go to confession hehe

- a dog attack …

- ARE THEY COMPARING A DOG TO THEIR FOSTER GIRL ??? STOP THAT

- they’re literally comparing a dog and a child i can’t

- and they’re vets now ???

- is this twice they’ve saved a dog

- dog :D

- they asked athena 😭😭

- “are you sure” oh my god i’m gonna cry aren’t i ??

- “i don’t want to be another name in a long list of people who failed her” 😔😔😔

- THEYVE ASKED MADDIE TOO

- her little voice oh my heart is breaking

- oh my god :(( mara you poor sweet baby i hope you get the love and safety and happiness you deserve

- i’m crying i can’t do this

- “she was afraid we weren’t goig to wake up” ILL SOB

- LOFT

- LOFT

- LOFT

- “she wants to know what i want for dinner” lmao

- DO I??? stay in the loft 🤭🤭🤭

- NOT WITH GOD WATCHING LMAO

- “i’m gonna have to break up with her” omg best idea you’ve had

- “you and tommy have the best idea”

- IT WAS A DATE

- OH SHIT

- OMG

- WE WERE ON A DATE

- “really?”

- “WAIT TOMMYS GAY” IS SO FUNNY ???

- not questinging buck but tommy 😭😭😭😭

- “is that weird” “NO ABSOLUTELY NOT”

- this do in t change a thing between us

- “he dumped me”

- HE CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HIM :((((

- “you should call him”

- ONCE HE GETS TO KNOW YOU

- i’m so happy aaaaa

- TURN AROUND AGBTHE DOOR

- VOME HERE

- HUG

- “call tommy”

- not them exiting with a parallel lmao

- hi eddie

- “heyyyy” hes so awkward

- dinner with her brother girl-

- HES SO AWKWARD STOP YOU LOSER I LOVE HIM

- “guy who needs a minute” eddie diaz im in your fucking walls

- DONT YET HER ILL KMS

- EW

- STRAIGHT EDDIE GET OUT OF HERE PLEASE

- “can’t wait to move out” me either LMAO ME

- karen my love 🫶🏻

- the blanket slowly coming down, like a barrier coming down

- “you’re safe here even if it doesn’t feel that way yet” :(((( AAAAAAAA

- SHE SPOKE :((( baby spoke im so proud of her im not okay

- CRYING RN

- BUCK ????

- did he call tommy 🤭🤭

- omg hiiii

- coffee date aaaa

- “mmm so not like that” LMAO

- “i would like to change that” aaa

- “i didn’t want to pressure you” AAAAAAAAAAA

- “i don’t know what im ready for but i am ready for something” i can’t do this

- “COME WITH ME TO MY SISTERS WEDDING” BUCKA AOSJDODBDDIS

- “evan.”

- HOLY SHIT

- DATE TO A WEDDING

- “i need someone to dance with” HOLY SHIT

- HUH

- STOP WEDDIGN ????

- EVERYONE STOP

- OH CLIFFHANGER

- BUCK AND EDDIE WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED

- 80s THEMED PARTY

- THE WEDDING IS THE CLIFFHANGER

- WHERE CHIM???

[blogalreadydoesntexist]

it's so so sad how ao3 is the most usable fic platform . I tried tumblr I tried ff.net I tried wattpad (and used it for a while) but ao3 is the one with the most understandable tagging system

and if theres a platform that also has something like that . it's too niche to have enough fics for my needs

its saddening but at least I'm not monetarily supporting them I guess

ALSO the fucking realest!!

i joined ao3 when i was 12 (if i hadnt blocked most of them the proshippers would hop on my ass and be victimblaming pussies over that comment) so i thankfully didnt donate any shit to them

also! the filtering system is Very Good on my autistic ass but gOD you have to go through every tag you dont want to look at and come up with like three fics that youre okay with

i dont read as much fan fiction anymore, or even books in general (cough cough im looking for stacyplays books and the rest of warrior cats and im trying to find the missing wings of fire book that disappeared in my room somewhere) but i might recommend chai??

it does mean you have to write your own stuff (partially) plus ai stuff but i find it very comforting to be able to, instead of hunting down that perfect fic for 'oh shit oh god i saw a spider and man do i wanna be held by astrid hofferson' i can just make it

plus it avoids the y/n stuff! y/n has become such a female dominated thing that i cant even read most reader fics anymore due to how popular y/n is combined with how over feminized y/n has become.

like all that goes through my mind is the jessica rabbit ass blonde girl with fair skin, straight ass hair, and 'shining blue orbs' instead of

the silly guy dude whos struggling with his identity aGAIN and has skin thats rough in places due to Being A Person and has glasses and bababbabbaba shit like that

(ps: never mind after Actually Reading just look for peeps who are doing fre suggestions ai is.. Ew. shutting up about supporting art theft arc)

[muav99]

So first post eee!!! ( Not edited so bare with) but if you like i’ll write part 2🩷 My favorite truth or dare trope🤭

Ot8- Pg-13 Truth or Dare

Smut (almost) - Soft dom Felix X Sub reader, Y/N used, best friend pining, Teasing, Warnings of Alcohol, Swearing

Pt 1.? Tbc

The night started out chill, Chan suggested we all go out and buy some Soju to share after the long ass week. Me, chan, Felix, and changbin went to the convenient store to grab the drinks. The rest of the guys stayed at mine to chill until we got back.

“We got em!”

Yelled chan as we ran through the door giddy to open up the bottles.

“Finally”

sighed hyunjin grabbing one for himself and taking a light sip.

We all took our swigs and sat in a circle on my floor. By the time we were buzzed enough Seungmin started the truth or dares.

“Truth or dare Han?”

He asked as he finished off his last drops and throws the bottle to the side.

“Dare”

says Han. Of course he would pick dare.

“I dare you to kiss hyunjin”

Seungmin says falling over absolutely dying laughing.

“EW…….okay” Han replies.

Felix is sitting beside you, he’s usually clingy but tonight its like he’s glued to my side. Subtle touches and does he keep looking at you? No thats weird. Han leans over to hyunjin who’s making the biggest upset glare at him. He quickly pecks his cheek and hyunjin pulls away dramatic screaming. Everyone’s dying at this point toppling over. Felix is leaning over laughing into your neck. You freeze. Unsure how to feel even though he normally does this, maybe its the alcohol. Your cheeks flush as he looks at you with concerned.

“You okay Y/n?” Felix asks.

He grabs your thigh and squeezes it in reassurance. But it creates more then reassurance.

“Im okay! Sorry, probably just a bit tipsy” You say.

“I’ll keep an eye on you then” he says pulling you in by the waist real close.

You look around searching to see if his behavior seems flirtatious to anyone else. But everyones in their own world. And besides you and Felix have been best friends how long? Years. He’s just being sweet. And besides he’s tipsy too. You lean into his touch to reciprocate his actions. Enjoying it more then you’d admit out loud.

“Y/n? Truth or dare?”, the thoughts in your head silenced by the voice of Changbin.

“Oh! Um has anyone done dare? Sure dare” you say trying to distract yourself from felix pressed against your side.

You finish off the bottle and look changbin in the eye.

“I dare you to sit in Felix’s lap the whole game” he says.

Felix loosens his grip slightly on your waist and looks at you slightly nervous now.

“Since you two are comfortable over there” Changbin says and points to your almost cuddled position.

The alcohol is starting to give you a bit more confidence so you look over to felix, where he’s trying to find anything to drink left. You slide closer and position yourself on his lap. Instead of nerves he exudes, he suddenly loosens up his body language again and gets comfortable. It feels right.

“Alright then move on” Felix says as he snuggles into your neck and wraps his arms around your waist tighter.

He has to be drunk now. Or am I just. Way too into this. You feel him harden under you and you gasp. Maybe he was just too comfortable now.

“You alright sweetheart?” He whispers right into your ear.

“I…..” your breath hitches and my heart beat gets faster and faster.

What is wrong with me. He’s your best friend get it together. And he’s a guy it. Happens. Right?

You turn your head where he’s looking so soft and pouty into your eyes. His gaze could hypnotize I swear. Is he doing this on purpose? He has to be.

-Hours go by-

The rest of the game plays out as expected. Everyone gets loud then crashes and half of the guys fell asleep. Its around 12 now and everyones found their sleeping spots or are getting into some type of snack. Its only you and Felix in your room now. God help me.

“Truth or dare Y/n?” He asks.

“Are we still playing or isnt that over?” You laugh trying to play cool.

“Only if you want to y/n” he says gazing up and down at you slightly.

I swear he has to be doing something. With the leftover liquor still in your system you felt good enough to continue.

“Sure Felix, truth” you say trying to act as calm as possible.

“Did I make you uncomfortable tonight?” He asks more timidly then before but still moves closer.

He made you feel things you shouldn’t and the liquor isn’t helping. If its such a taboo, why do you want him so much. Why is he looking at you like that, like he never has before. Just answer him….

“I wasn’t uncomfortable felix.” You say not daring to look up.

“Y/n.” Felix moves in even closer and pushes a piece of hair behind your ear.

“I liked you being so close to me all night.” He says looking you in the eyes.

You gulp scared to even speak. You croak out dryly nervous as all hell. “Really?”

“Is it so bad I wanted you even closer?” He says dead serious. Gazing into your eyes for an answer.

Even Closer?? He. You begin to pulsate in response, heat radiating off your body. Who is this felix? Have you really not been around him drunk before?

“No” you blurt out and then cover your face in shock of what you said.

“Y/n its okay. I mean it really, and I um….I could feel you when you were sitting on me.” He whispers teasingly but lightly into your left ear.

Your cheeks become bright red and you as subtly as possible close your legs to try and rid of the tension. But he notices of course.

He chuckles slightly, “You nervous y/n?”.

Lying through your teeth wouldn’t get you through this. And how he’s speaking to you is only going to make your situation worse if he keeps it up with the teasing. God his voice. He grabs your hand and intertwines it with his. He kisses your cheek lightly.

“Y/n, can I kiss you? I know you want me to.” Slight rasp in his voice apparent as it drops.

“Of course, I do but….”

He cuts you off by grasping your cheek and connecting your lips softly but passionately. In the middle of desperate kisses he says

“Ive….wanted……this………so long……….you don’t……even know” he pulls away to catch his breath inches from your face.

“I did too. I just didn’t know how to…..” you say as he cuts you off with a small peck.

“Its okay y/n, right now I just want you to feel good okay? Is that okay baby?”

His hands rub painfully slow up and down your thighs.

Fuck. Baby? The pet names made you melt and with his deep voice? You were wetter then ever.

“Felix….please” you plead.

You weren’t usually the desperate type but everything changes in the right circumstances right?…..

Thank you for reading😭💙💙 Hopefully you liked it and maybe soon i’ll start requests.

[sierrasbiggestfan]

my thoughts on episodes 2-4 of the td 23 reboot, spoilers ahead (i wrote these while watching the episode btw)

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ep 2

millie is so lesbian coded

caleb is probably going to be the downfall of pryia

are they going to make ripper and axel get together..? 🙁 i hate my life

i feel like chase is going to get eliminated this episode

praying rippers crush on axel is one sided

skunk butt is doing so horrible in this oml

okay wait nvm skunk butt is doing a lil better

ripper covering himself in butter 😭 oml

rippers scenes in this are trumatizjng because what.

team skunk butt is going through it

oh my god the skunk butt comeback is insane

IH MY GOD MILLIE SENDING DAMIEN DOWN FHE 4 POINT SLIDE SOMEONE SAVE HIM

millie is now friendless 😖 someone save our lesbian icon

MK FETTING THE INTERN OUTFIT OOOOOO 😯

mk x julia real

i was right abt chase being out, tbh idk how to feel abt it he was funny but ill survive without him on the show 😭

ep 3

begging for skunk butt to win immunity for this episode

if rat face loses millie is probably out literally everyone is against her

THE FACT EVERYONE GOY SO SHOVKED BY DAMIEN CALLING MILLE A RIPPER ITS SO FUNNY THATS SEEN AS SUCH A HARSH INSULT

i want more rajbow moments 😞

prillie canon 👩‍❤️‍💋‍👩 the way pryia went with millie to the more dangerous one

BOWIE SAID SUS EW

they better not make ripper and axel canon im going to kill myself oml

wayne and rajs “🥺” faces when they were talking abt how cheating wasnt good was so cute omg

RAJ AND WAYNE ARE SO CRUSHED OVRR CHEATING IN THE CHALLENGE

yay millie got forgiven!!!!!

i love evil lesbians (mk and julia)

JULIA JUST SAID???? MK WAS MAKING??? HER BLUSH??? AM I LVER THINKING THIS??? IM GOING INSANE

zees lil racoon buddy omf

every ripper scene in this season makes me want to kill myself 🙁

FINALLT SKUNK BUTT WINS

millie is probably out

yeah i was right 😭 i speculated she was going to be a early elimination but yknow

ep 4

raj and bowie are so silyl im going to scream

“i know im not mille but im here if you need me” guys prillie canon even if mille isnt here

axel saying ripper is not her type, yay! (her type is women guys)

i like this challenge

RAJ NOO

“its better for us all if my dms stay private” 🤨

emma is making her team flop 😭 if rat face loses emma is doomed

“if mks brain drove a cool car id date it” LESBIAN JULIA IS LESBIAN THYE ARE CANON MK AND JULIA REAL

emmas fingernail biting habit is so silly shes so real

bowie feeling so bad abt cheating bc it upsets raj aw 😢

BOWIE NO

the one time emma doesnt go with her gut she loses 😞 im happt skunk butt won

EMMA NOO

im not surprised she was out but i love her so much i dont wnat jer to go 🙁

rippers poem. oh my god ripper what the scallop 😦

AXEL PLS REJECT HIM PlS

NO THEY KISSED I HATE MY LIFE

WHY ARE THEY CANON NONONONO

[goingtochurch]

THE EARTHSPARK REVIEW NO ONE ASKED FOR EP:13 "Missed Connection"

This one's my favorite. Head's up. This might be long.

AW THEY PRETENDING TO HAVE ALT MODES THATS SO CUTE

BEE AND ALEX HANGING OUT

"where's-" *explosion*

sounds about right

dramatic af nightshade thank you stellar performance

"the first 5006 tried to destroy me"

THE H A N D F L I P

ew the outdoors

GOD I FEEL TH A T

dot comin in clutch with the mom advice

Alex is too relatable

SCIENCE FICTION?????

I got roasted during the binge with My Binging Buddy because I had a doubt that Alex Malto was autistic in some capacity...i think the roasting was warranted

an additional quote from my third watch through with him for talking about the previous roast "Its like asking if water is wet"

Laying on the table in true Neurodivergent fashion Nightshade

CASUALLY DOXXES AN AUTHOR?????

ah yes go into the creepy woods

oh glowing foreshadowing object

HOLOFORMS CANON HECK YEAH

nightshade followed the weird flying contraption INTO A CRYPT

very smart nightshade thank u

TARANTUALASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

HES SO NICE SOUNDING OMG

oop realizing stereotypes are wrong

how tf did nightshade know that would project all of t h a t

"...missed connection" ROLL CREDITS

the other siblings desperately trying to fix the smart trainer is so cute

equally cute that nightshade is still enthused cause they kinda helped

i love the way tarantulas moves

"ILL PREPARE THE WORKSTATION" OMG NIGHTSHADE MY HEART

tarantulas sounds so h u r t

alt modes as a form of expression is amazing

"it is a gift to know yourself so young..." omg

MONTAGE TIME MONTAGE TIME

THE FUCKING B O W

d o r k

i like the detail that it covers the decepticon symbol

tarantulas wants nightshade to be safe aA

i like this mentor protégé thing

another "hypothetically if i meet a decepticon" conversation

tarantulas no

tARANTULAS D O N T

dang it

NIGHTSHADE ITS OKAY

TARANTULAS P L E A S E

dot is a badass in every situation

The clear fear from cybertronians for something ghost is doing is a nice detail

MEMORY DELETION TECH CONFIRMATION

no nightshade yOU DONT NEED TO APOLOGIZE

THE MISCOMMUNICATION

SOMEONE JUST S A Y SOMETHIN

tarantulas is actually terrifying sometimes

YEAHHHHHHH OWL ALT MODE FANTASTIC

"I WAS NEVER LOST" YEAH NIGHTSHADE GET EM BABY

that took the other maltos a minute

the realization from tarantulas that they are running too

TARANTULAS ALLY MOMENT

NIGHTSHADE GOT SOMEONE WHO UNDERSTOOD THEM ONLY FOR THEM TO BE HUNTED DOWN UGH

i want more tarantulas that is all