I’m tired of all this fighting… with myself, the desire to be perfect is hard when you have the crushing weight of the world on your shoulders. Keeping it all together is exhausting and no matter how hard you try the OCD seeps out of you… as people around you say “ Why are you so particular?” … “ you’re letting it win.” No shit I’m letting it win because if I don’t then that crushing weight of the world will disappear because it has fallen from my shoulders and killed everyone I love. I should give my OCD a name something like Karen, because it’s always there being a god damn nag trying to bring me down. “What if you stabbed yourself with that knife? Just take all your meds. Drink the bleach…” I just want it to stop, please can someone make it stop. 
we love having to explain your ocd over the phone with your parents and your brother in the car
Having to talk about your harmocd and how it makes you have never ending sh and sui. thoughts, your medical trauma, and having to talk ab childhood trauma when the people that could be contributing are in the same car as you
Plus they won’t shut up so you can hear what your prospective therapist is saying
“—— you don’t need therapy, I don’t know why you’re making them spend all this money”
and they don’t take insurance
so my parents will have to help me pay for it
My parents have been so supportive of me throughout all of this but it hurts to have them see this side of me
Reposted from @ocd_advice If you can relate then you’ll know how scary this is. I remember when I would write out every interaction I had with someone straight afterwards, because I had no trust in my ability to remember it accurately later on. I still to this day prefer to have someone with me when I leave the house, or when I’m driving etc, so if I ‘snapped’ or ‘lost control’ I’d at least have a witness or someone to intervene. I’m still learning to build trust in myself, it’s a long but very important process 💙 - #ocd #pureo #pureocd #pocd #rocd #harmocd #obsessivecompulsivedisorder #intrusivethoughts #ocdawareness #ocdrecovery #compulsion #ocdhelp #ocdadvice #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #mentalhealthquotes #youarenotalone #recovery #trauma #healing #mindfulness #anxiety #depression #mentalhealthdisorder https://www.instagram.com/p/CO2IeYRgQmz/?igshid=vjumikq86pez
lately i’ve felt stuck with my therapist, but today i had a great session. i guess the message i’m trying to convey is that you never know when things are going to get better. you may be going through hell, and then the next day can turn out to be wonderful. have a great night 💕
What if there was a video game called HARM OCD where you had to run around with a knife and you had to try to NOT stab your friends and family? You never die, but your loved ones might 😭🔪 it's a scary thought but I'm happy that I'm doing well enough to be able to laugh and joke about my harmful intrusive thoughts. Sometimes that's helpful. Do you like this one? I'm going to put it in my Redbubble store so you could get this as a sticker and I plan to design more stickers✌️#harmocd #art #digitalart #cuteart #fanart #kirby #pink #icd #obsessivecompulsivedisorder #intrusivethoughts #pureocd #procreate #sticker #ipad2018 #applepencil #nintendofanart #nintendo #anxiety #kirbymemes https://www.instagram.com/p/BtVZHfmFIrM/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=1phc44vpq2hpe
Every cancel culture little shit who tries to be like "but what if these thoughts are actually bad and you are a bad person bc of it?" at someone with OCD can catch these fucking hands. Literally SHUT UP!!!! SHUT UP SO BAD I'LL FUCKING EAT YOU AND SHOVE YOUR FACE INTO GRASS!!!!
Did you know that obsessive thoughts include what ifs? That they include "I could be a bad person"? That they include all the maybes, all the somehows, all the possibilities and the could bes?
Stop encouraging people's mental illness. OCD is an ANXIETY DISORDER. OCD is worsened by all those what ifs and maybes and questions.
Stop aggravating people's mental illness, stop encouraging their obsessive thoughts to fester. You are actively making it worse. Stop.
I literally shouldn't have to tell you. Even if someone has pOCD, harmOCD, etc. It doesn't make them a bad person and you literally suck for saying so.
Want to know what #realocdproblems look like? Newest video talks about #realeventocd and how ocd thoughts turn molehills into mountains. Video posting by noon today eastern time. Link will be in bio.
Great post as always, be sure to give her a follow! Posted @withrepost • @life_without_anxiety Rituals that one can see are not the only kind of rituals performed by individuals with OCD. Mental rituals are performed internally and are not outwardly observable behaviors. Physically observable rituals include (but are not limited to) compulsive behaviors such as cleaning, ordering/arranging, checking, repeating, using barriers, avoidance, etc. Mental rituals include (but are not limited to) avoidance, neutralizing a “bad” thought with a “good” thought, distraction, ritualistic prayer, checking physical feelings/emotions/thoughts/urges/etc., counting, etc. Rituals, whether they are observable or not, keep us stuck in our OCD as they negatively reinforce the OC cycle to keep playing out (info-graphic of this cycle located in my saved stories). Rituals tell our brain that the upsetting intrusive thoughts are valid and meaningful which keeps the intrusions coming back, getting stronger, and bringing friends. It is so important to resist utilizing compulsions of all types. I believe in your ability to allow your thoughts to float in and out of your mind without performing safety behaviors. I believe in your ability to ride the wave of anxiety and live according to your values. I believe in YOU.💛 . . #ocd #ocdrecovery #obsessivecompulsivedisorder #intrusivethoughts #compulsion #pedophileocd #harmocd #scrupulosity #relationshipocd #contamination #pureocd #anxiety #doubt #fear #anxietydisorder #sexualorientationocd #perfectionism #uncertainty #mentalhealth #panic #exposureresponseprevention #ocdrecovery #mindfulness #exposuretherapy #cbt #recovery #yougotthis #psychology #selfcompassion #wecandohardthings