#harry styles text au

[harrywavycurly]

Summary: Harry is given the wrong number when he goes out to a bar but oddly enough he’s not that upset about it because the number he’s given belongs to you. He quickly learns you’re southern and from then on he finds himself coming up with excuses to talk to you because you not only have no clue he’s Harry Styles you also just bring him a sense of comfort that he can’t seem to find with anyone else. Will you ever learn who he really is? And if you do will it change anything? Let’s find out shall we?✨

Pairing: Harry Styles x southern!reader

CW: Language

Tag List: Open

A/N: this series started off from a request I got for Harry to text someone southern and the idea just took off in my brain from there so I hope y’all enjoy💖

Conversations: here

Extras: here

*this is a texting story but you’ll find everything in the correct order down below*

Part 1: Happens All The Time

Part 2: Wonky

Part 3: Smooth as Sandpaper

Part 4: Fiddlesticks

Part 5: Church it Up

Part 6: After A While

Part 7: King George

Part 8: How in Tarnation

Part 9: Don’t be Ugly

Part 10: As All Get Out bonus convo between Harry and Niall here

Part 11: Odd Little Duck

Part 12: Beat it With a Stick bookstore with Harry here

Part 13: Till the Cows Come Home bonus convo between Harry and Niall here

Part 14: Oh My Days

Part 15: Full As a Tick Harry picking you up here

Part 16: Like A Fiddle

Part 17: Tall Order To Fill

Part 18: Borrowing Trouble how your date ended with Harry here

Part 19: A Little About A Lot you meet Jeff here

Part 20.1: You Thought

Part 20.2: Saddle Up

Part 21: Rub Some Dirt On It Harry’s convo with Jeff here

Part 22: So I Can Kiss You Anytime I Want

Part 23: You Better Not

Part 24: A Sack of Potatoes convo with Kathy here

Part 25: Mouse in Your Pocket

Part 26: Mind Your Manners convo with Jeff here

Part 27: Fired Up

Part 28: Some Kinda Alright

[earlgraysdeath]

sirius: james it’s been 11 hours and remus still hasn’t called, I should call him.

james: dude I’m literally in the shower right now can this wait?

regulus: does he know I’m here?

sirius: yes hi reggie, pause the couple shit I need attention.

[jarofstyles]

I love your testing posts!!! Can we please get more best friends dad Harry texts????

Yes I can angel! This is the verboten universe 🤗 time wise, right after Letting Loose chapter

Check out our Patreon!

Harry- bold

🩷Y/N- italics

🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽🪽~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

🩷: I miss you :/

H: I know. I miss you too. I’m sorry, I didn’t anticipate her coming home so soon.

🩷: it’s okay, honest. She’s your daughter, she’s more of a right to be there than me

H: Mm. Well I missed her but I’m sorry our plans got derailed.

🩷: plans you still haven’t told me, sir

H: Sir? I like it.

H: We were going to make pizzas in the yard with the pizza oven that the house came with, split a bottle of wine….. and other such things.

🩷: such things assssss?

H: I bought something fun to try with you.

🩷: do tell, please.

H: I like the manners. Sweet thing you are.

H: A toy. You told me you like a bit of overstimulation, and it’s got great reviews. I spent a few days researching.

🩷: that makes me irrationally fond and also horny at the same time

H: You’re welcome? I think? Haha.

🩷: yes, please. :( I want to try it with you.

🩷: you’ve been liking the experimenting then? We haven’t discussed it much.

H: I’ve been loving it. I’ve been around the block a few times but I didn’t realize how much I’d been missing out on.

H: I love discovering things with you.

🩷: it better be only me. 🤨

H: I’d never dream of anyone else. Trust me.

H: You’re my sweet girl, yeah? I can’t fathom touching someone else when you’ve ruined me.

🩷: and you love when I call you daddy ;)

H: I mean, yes. I do enjoy that. More than I anticipated

🩷: what else do you like more than you thought?

H: this is going to get very crude, sweetheart…

🩷: good. I can’t be there to convince you in person but I like when you’re dirty with me. 🥺 please, Daddy?

H: You’re trouble.

🩷: yes, and you enjoy it. ;)

H: I do.

H: I enjoy being… messy. I like how wet you get for me and the mess you leave on my skin and the sheets. Like to see you get all soft and pliable for me, making a mess on my cock with it and the sounds it makes. Knowing you get like that for me alone does a lot for me.

H: and I like when you’re on top and you give up a little, let me take back over and fuck up into you. That gets those noises out of you.

🩷: well you get my spot perfectly that way. Though you always get it. I’m happy you like me being messy, considering I’ve got little say in that.

🩷: is that why you go a bit feral when you take me doggy? Cause you watch how wet I get for you?

H: Precisely.

🩷: I really like how you’ve been choking me. I didn’t know I’d be into it- or you

🩷: you’ve been giving it to me good, Daddy. I’m getting spoiled and now I feel like I can’t go a day without it :(

🩷: keep thinking about last time when you told me you wanted to knock me up and keep your cum inside of me and fucked it into me after you pulled out made a bigger mess… you’ve no idea how many times I’ve been thinking about it.

H: Darling, you’re causing problems for me now.

🩷: who says you can’t come to my place?

H: I don’t know, baby… I shouldn’t, may be seen as suspicious since I stay home so much.

🩷: say you’re going out with your friends last minute. Please? 🥺

🩷: please Daddy? I’m all worked up and I’m wearing something pretty….

🩷: [Photo Attachment]

H: Fucks sake, sweetheart… you can’t just do that.

🩷: I just did ;) come on, old man. Come over and touch me. I’ve been waiting for you all day.

H: give me 20 minutes.

🩷: 😇😇😇 I’ll buzz you up.

[wherebrkenheartsgo]

Summary: You’ve known the international pop star since the One Direction days, but only the past year and a half have you been able to call him your boyfriend. This series is all about what life is like being a normal person who just so happens to be dating the one and only Harry Edward Styles. This texting series will show that every relationship has it’s highs and it’s lows so buckle up because dating Harry isn’t always easy, but damn does he love you. 🪩✨

Status: Ongoing

Tag List: Open

Story Type: Established Relationship

A/N: I hope y’all enjoy this texting series and it may be a Harry series but you’ll see a certain Irish man a few times as well because I can’t write Harry without mentioning Niall✨

*this is mainly a texting series but you’ll find everything below*

Instagrams: Coming Soon✨

Conversations: Coming Soon✨

Everything Else: Here

Part 1: That’s Odd

[green-typewriterz]

LILACS AND FORGET ME NOTS

Pt TWO

PART ONE

Harry Styles x Queen!reader

Summary: its been a few years since your wedding to harry and you couldnt be happier

ASK: Could you write a prince Harry Styles/ princess reader. It can be an idea of your choosing PART TWO TO PREVIOUS ASK

Warnings: talks of battle, death of mother, mentions of scars, misogyny if u squint (mediaeval era)

word count: 1295

Three years had passed since the wedding and both you and Harry were the happiest you could be together. However, despite the connection between the two allied families, war was still building in the west and there was no way to avoid it. Your father had abdicated the throne two years ago and it was your job as Queen to assure your people would not feel the effects of the storms raging in other places.

Harry stuck by your side, an innocence to war that you envied. He was a good fighter, skilled in combat, but he had never fought in battle, you weren’t sure if he was prepared. You had chipped away at his rough personality for years and made him a kind, generous king, but it was up to you to fight now - something he didn’t agree with. You both sat at the large birch table in the dining hall, hands intertwined tightly.

“The Western armies are approaching quickly, Y/N. I’m sure you realise I am expected to fight?” Harry spoke softly, not taking his eyes off of his beloved wife. You nodded slowly, understanding what had to be done.

You put down your glass and took both of his hands in your own, talking quietly, “you must understand that I am to fight as well.” His eyes widened, shocked into a silence that you spoke into, “I am nothing if not my mother. I must lead her army the same way she had.”

You barely spoke of your mother, but a portrait of her hung in nearly every room, watching like some kind of goddess. Harry found himself staring at the paintings for hours, wondering about the shine in her eyes and the scars on her face. He had never seen the same determined glint of battle in your eyes, so your confession scared him.

“You can't. You aren’t prepared, my love.” He replied, worry spreading through him like fire. You spared a short glance with your maid and she nodded silently, leaving the room. This was a private matter and Tilly understood that. “I don’t know how I’d live if you were to be injured.”

You sighed and let go of his hands. “You don’t think I feel the same? You are strong, Harry, I know this. But you’ve never fought!” He stared at you for a moment. Then, so quietly you weren’t sure he had ever spoken, he whispered:

“How can you feel the same?” You questioned his words in confusion, barely understanding what he meant. He spoke loudly now, “You may be Queen, but you are no warrior either. I don’t have a choice, Y/N. I have to fight. You don’t.”

You scoffed and stood, heading over to the large fire and staring at the dwindling embers. “I find, what makes a good ruler is their ambition, their willingness to die for their people. Don’t you?” You heard a scrape behind you and after a moment, felt Harry’s strong hands gently clasp your waist. He rested his head on your shoulder, breathing in the smell of your perfume. You leaned backward into him.

The fire burned low, the room’s coldness forcing the flames away. “Promise me you won’t go.” He whispered, begging. You didn’t turn to look at him, knowing you would not be able to give your reply to his face. His breathing was calm against your neck, blowing small strands of hair away from your skin.

“I promise.”

What a solemn lie it was.

——

You woke in the early morning, the sun casting a golden hue over the room. You had written a letter in haste, the parchment creased from the amount of times you had folded and unfolded it to check the wording. Once you were certain it was perfect, you got ready, putting on a simple tunic and trousers. Your horse was waiting in the crisp morning air, its armour already placed and secured. You spent a moment calming her and placed your head against hers, whispering a silent plea to any sort of spiritual being that was listening for her safety, then set off, heading to the large open field where the battle was to take place.

Your horse slowed as it reached the main knight’s grounds and you felt the stares of Harry’s army on your back. They most likely didn’t expect any women to be on the battlefield. Your own army arrived moments later, clad in their glinting silver armour. You were handed a chest plate and chainmail of your own and quickly got prepared, your fingers gently grazing over the forget me nots branded onto the front. This was your mother’s armour, your mother’s weaponry and you wore it with pride.

You stood in the main tent, strategising with your Countess Marshal, when Harry stormed in, clad in his own armour. “You left, not only without me, but after you had promised to stay behind!” He shouted and the knight excused herself with a knowing smile toward you, she had known this was coming.

“There is no time for this Harry, there is a war.” You spoke back, writing notes quickly on a bit of parchment. He walked closer and took both of your hands, stopping you from working. His eyes blazed with anger and worry, but you could tell any anger was not aimed toward you, yet to himself for not keeping you safe. “This is my country's tradition.”

He stood there, still clasping your hands. “What do you mean by tradition? There is no tradition here; it is a battlefield.”

You sighed and let go, fixing your armour tighter to you. “I am very aware of where we are situated, Harry. Don’t be fooled by my apparent femininity, I am not naive to what a knight looks like. Did you think the scars on my mother’s portrait were from sewing? The women here fight, just the same as your men do. I am trained for this, as are my girls. Don’t you worry about some futile argument of whether or not I can when I clearly already have before under my mother’s guidance.”

Harry had never seen this side of you before, the ambition, the strength. You seemed like some sort of warrior queen he had only heard of in legend. He smiled and stood closer, taking your chin in his hand. “Well, let’s agree to let one another fight. Though, you cannot stop me from worrying about you.” You nodded and he leant forward, your lips connecting in a sweet kiss.

“Milady- oh.” Your Countess Marshall, Lilibet walked into the tent, stopping in her tracks as she saw the two of you kissing. Her face tinted red. “My apologies to your highnesses, but we are all prepared.”

You laughed and pulled away from the kiss, leaving a lingering longing in Harry’s heart for something more than what had been given. “My bow, Lili.” She grinned and handed it to you swiftly. Your fingers traced over the engravings in a soothing pattern as you made your way out of the tent, sparing one last glance at your husband. You placed your sword into its hilt and headed for your horse, brushing its main gently.

“My love!” Harry called out and you turned to see him running toward you. He placed a strong kiss to your lips and lifted you into his arms, the momentum spinning the both of you around. “A goodbye kiss” He whispered as you pulled apart.

The both of you smiled and you smoothed his mess of waves as you replied, “Stay true, fight honourably.” You climbed onto your horse and rode away, preparing your bow. Harry watched you leave with a kind, loving smile. He knew you’d fight. And he knew you’d win.

[harrrystyles-writing]

posso pedir troca de mensagens após o sexo casual deles?

[myfriendfaust]

Actually writing is fun when you just do it for yourself. None of my fan fiction is sexy and all of it is conceptually bonkers. I will not publish any of it.

[b3ach-bunn7]

WE SUFFOCATED OUR LOVE

a random number starts texting you and you decide to text back

Or, the bassist of your favourite band accidentally messages you and u fall in love

inspired by this fic 😆 and my fav band the driver era

band!au, no quirks, text form, eventual romance

————————————————————————-

September 18th

10:37 pm

Unknown: Ask Shiggy to grab me a monster on his way back

You: a monster?? are u 12…

Unknown: Shut up and ask

You: sorry I think you have the wrong number

Unknown: No I don’t

You: lowkey u do..

You: r u trying to hack me

Unknown: You’re still texting me so u would probably fall for it

You: okay ur still textjng me genius

Unknown: Texting*

You: Shut up.

You: okay don’t actually shut up

Unknown: Thought I was a hacker

You: maybe I wanna be hacked

Unknown: Is this flirting

You: maybe

You: r u really sexy

Unknown: Extremely

You: 😍 feeling bashful rn

You: why r u drinking monsters anyways

You: Wait am i actually messaging a 12 yr old

September 19th

4:03 am

Unknown: I’m not 12 years old

Unknown: I’m 24

Unknown: And i drink monsters for energy

Unknown: And because they r yummy

Unknown: And cheap

You: omfg you don’t need a separate text for every word

Unknown: Oh

Unknown: Didn’t think you’d be awake so late

You: well I wasn’t but SOMEONE is messaging me at 4am

You: also I’m 24 2

Unknown: Didn’t ask

You: kys

Unknown: Ok bye

You: pussy

You: why are u even awake so late

Unknown: I’m writing

You: omg 😳 are u an author

Unknown: Lol no

Unknown: I write music

You: OMG

You: even better

You: what do u play

Unknown: Bass

Unknown: And I sing kinda

You: kinda?

Unknown: I sing backup mainly

Unknown: Or lead if I’m feeling extra generous

You: generous?

Unknown: To please all my loving woman fans ofc 😫

You: EWW TF

You: DONT EVER USE EMOJIS AGAIN BRUH 😭

Unknown: 😭💔.

You: literally throwing up alllllxover my room

Unknown: Weirdo

Unknown: Go to sleep

You: don’t tell me what to do 🙄

Unknown: Okay don’t sleep

You: lowkey have to I have uni tomorrow

Unknown: Loser

You: shush

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

September 19th

8:47 am

You: FUCK YOU

September 19th

2:30 pm

Unknown: Meanie 😢

You: i overslept because of you

Unknown: Were you up all night thinking about me

You: i dont eben know ur name

Unknown: Dabi

You: oh ur sooooo emo and edgy

Dabi: Shut up

You: nobody... understands you😕⛓️🥀

Dabi: You gonna tell me ur name or what

You: Y/N

Dabi: Pretty name

You: dont stalk me plz

Dabi: No promises

————————————————————————

September 28th

10:02 pm

You: so if u dont go uni what do you do

Dabi: I told you i write music

Dabi: Am also in a band

You: wait are u like

You: successful

You: like do u make money from it

Dabi: Well yes

Dabi: Its my job

You: wait thats kinda cool

Dabi:  😎 

You: take it back so fast

You: do u stream ur music on like spotify

You: let me listen

You: whats ur band called

Dabi: No

You: mid name but i will look it up

Dabi: I dont wanna tell you

Dabi: Not right now at least

You: r u like super famous

You: am i messaging harry styles rn

Dabi: Im sorry i kept this from u for so long

You: is 1D cming back

You: plz

Dabi: Never

Dabi: Narry ruined us😔

You: HAHAH

You: HWO DO U KNOW WHAT TAHT IS

Dabi: I have a sister

Dabi: But seriously I'll tell you one day

You: how do ik ur not lying about ur music 🤔

Dabi: [image attachment]

September 28th

10:13pm

You: MINABHABHAE

You: LOOK

You: OMFG

You: [image attachment]

You: HIS HAND IS ALL TATTED UP AND SEXY

You: AND THAT BASS

You: just creamed my pants

Mina: GIRL

Mina: you dont even know what he looks like

Mina: he does have sexy hands tho

You: sexy hands = sexy face

You: its litch science

Mina: ur so whipped and its been a week

You: uhm

You: ten days actually

Mina: ur not right in the head

September 28th

10:22 pm

Dabi: Did my incredible bass shock u to silence

You: i literally collapsed when i saw it

You: i like the blue

You: also ur tattoos are cool

Dabi: Thanks babe

You: mhm

You: yh

You: did they hurt

You: when u got them done

Dabi: Nah they werent too bad

Dabi: Worst was probs the ones on my chest

You: r u like alll tatted up

Dabi: I am

Dabi: That okay?

You: mhm

You: very cool

You: i want a tatto but im lowkey scared like

You: what if it hurts

Dabi: Ill get one with you

Dabi: Ill talk you through it

Dabi: Distract you from the pain

You: mhm

You: yes

You: very good

You: my roomates calling me ttylxox

September 28th

10:30pm

You: [screenshot]

You: hes SOO FLIRTING RIGHT

Mina: oh babe this reads like a porno

You: DFHBAJHF

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

October 11th

8:37 pm

You: [link attachment]

You: listen to this song

You: LOV is the best band eva

Dabi: LOL

You: WHAT

You: its so good its my fav band

You: im seeing them next month

Dabi: Really

You: r u jelly

Dabi: Very

Dabi: If only i could be there

You: i think theres still tickets for sale if u acc wanna come

Dabi: You tryna see me in person?

You: mayhaps

You: ur just so mysterious

You: what if ur actually like a pedo

Dabi: The fuck

Dabi: I’m no pedo

You: okay cool

You: you can come to the concert then

Dabi: Seriously?

October 11th

8:47pm

You: MINA

You: PLEASE

You: [screenshot attachment]

You: SHALL I SAY YEA

Mina: UHM

Mina: YES

Mina: concerts are public so if he’s actually a creep you’ll be safe

You: OKAY

October 11th

8:50pm

You: okay omg

You: shall we actually do this

Dabi: Yeah

Dabi: You got another month to figure out if I’m a pedo

You: now I deffo think you’re one

—————————————————————————

October 17th

6:45 pm

Dabi: Does this sound good

Dabi: [audio message]

You: WOAH

You: that sounds really good

You: is that u talking at the end

Dabi: Yeah my roommate walked in

You: ur voice is so deep

Dabi: Sexy right

You: gosh so modest too

Dabi: I’m working on a new song but I can’t tell if I like that riff

You: u should like it

You: it’s very good

Dabi: Thanks babe

You: soooooo

You: can u show me ur band now 😁

Dabi: No 😁

You: 🤬

—————————————————————————

October 21st

8:33pm

You: what would u do if we meet irl and IM actually famous

You: like u pull up to the concert and I’m there but I’m actually like Jojo siwa or something

Dabi: I’d be a bit disappointed

You: u don’t fw jojo??

Dabi: No but she’s gay and I’d hope all my flirting was being put to good use here

You: hardee har

————————————————————————

October 25th

6:45pm

You: I’m supposed to be studying but

You: I can’t stop thinking if halloweeen😝

Dabi: You going trick or treating?

You: i wish

You: unfortunately too old for that now

Dabi: Loser

Dabi: My little brothers 11 so I get to do it with him

Dabi: But I gotta act cool like I don’t wanna do it

You: IM SO JELLY

You: can I borrow ur little brother on the 31st of October plz

Dabi: No weirdo

You: sigh

You: I’m going to a party at least

Dabi: Oh yeah

Dabi: What are u dressing up as

You: me and my friend are going as monster high girls 😁😁😁

You: shes draculaura and I’m clawdeen 😜

Dabi: Sick

Dabi: U have to show me when you do it

You: gosh ur so obsessed with me

You: but okay

—————————————————————————

October 28th

7:00pm

You: [image attachment]

You: the fit is ready

Dabi: Why aren’t u wearing it

You: im gonnna do the full reveal ON halloween

Dabi: Sigh fine

You: what are you wearing punk

Dabi: Punk 😭

You: LOL

Dabi: U can’t laugh

You: okay…

Dabi: You know that show curious George

You: HAHAHA

You: R U FONNA BE THE YELLOW HAT MAN

Dabi: You said u wouldn’t laugh 😔

You: NO ITS SO CUTE

Dabi: I got him a little monkey onesie

You: AWWW

You: THATS SO CUTE

October 28th

7:10 pm

You: [screenshot attachment]

You: when he’s a good older brother 😍😍❤️😝

Mina: okay bare minimum 😍😍😍

You: SHUT UP

—————————————————————————-

October 31st

6:00 pm

Dabi: [image attachment]

Dabi: Ur favourite childhood father figure

You: OMG

You: U GUYS LOOK SO GOOD

You: crazy how ur face is covered🙄

Dabi: You love the thrill of the mystery

Dabi: Let’s see ur costume

You: my party starts at like nine bruh 😭

You: im in bed watching movies

Dabi: Loser

Dabi: Imagine not trick or treating

You: u suck so much

Dabi: Ofc I do 😋

You: VOMIT 🤢

October 31st

6:07pm

You: [image attachment]

You: Mina.

You: look at his ARMS IN THAT SUIT

Mina: it’s bright yellow

You: HES CURIOUS GEORGE MAN

You: his little brothers the monkey

Mina: WAIT WHY IS THAT KINDA CUTE

You: IK

Mina: and he does look sexy in that button up

You: the tattoos🤤

Mina: love a man with a dark past 😍

You: god im so scared to see him

You: the concerts on the 10th

Mina: you’ll be okay babe Dw

October 31st

8:30pm

You: [image attachment]

You: it’s…. A full moon.. I feel myself… changing 🐺

Dabi: Woah

Dabi: You look hot

You: omg

You: thank u

Dabi: You’re pretty too

Dabi: R u wearing that to the concert

You: LOL NO

You: I haven’t decided yet

Dabi: U have to show me

Dabi: So I can find you

You: and how am I gonna find you

Dabi: You’ll find me

November 3rd

7:02pm

Dabi: [audio attachment]

Dabi: Listen please 😄

Dabi: What do you think

You: why r u acc good at this

You: I LOVE

You: yk it kinda sounds like LOV

You: I think you’ll like their music

Dabi: Girl I listen to them

You: GIRL???

You: sassy man apocalypse is alive and well

Dabi: Whos ur favourite band member

You: hmmmm

You: I like the drummer

You: himiko she’s so cute

You: but the bassist 🤤🤤🤤

You: Touya

You: need him in ways I can’t articulate over message 😳

You: uhm where did u go

You: did my thirsting freak u out

Dabi: No ur good

Dabi: I thought you’d like the guitarist

Dabi: Shiggy

Dabi: Every girl is obsessed with him

You: yeah but Touya is all emo kinda

You: I love it

November 8th

9:00pm

You: [image attachment]

You: fit check for the concert😜

Dabi: I love it

Dabi: Very Blue

Dabi: That’s my fav colour

You: that’s why I’m wearing it??

Dabi: Blushing rn 🤭

You: HAHA

November 10th

6:30 pm

You: On my way! now

You: tf

Dabi: Can’t wait to see you!

You: LOL SHUSH

You: im nervous

Dabi: Don’t be

Dabi: Im excited to see you

You: me too 😆

November 10th

6:50pm

Mina: be careful plz

Mina: there’s loads of people around but still

Mina: he could be a freak in disguise

You: I know babe Dw dw

You: I’ll keep u updated

Mina: good

Mina: r u gonna give him a biggggg fat smooch 🤤

You: SHUT UP

November 7th

7:00pm

You: are you here?

Dabi: Yeah

You: omg

You: im scared

Dabi: Lowkey same

Dabi: But im so manly and strong so im actually not scared

You: LOL

Dabi: Okay wait

Dabi: I need to tell you smth

You: is this u telling me the pedo allegations r true….

Dabi: Before we meet u need to know

You: yeah what’s up?

Dabi: Idk how to say this without u thinking I’m lying but

Dabi: I’m Touya

You: uh

You: what 😅

Dabi: I just didn’t wanna tell you because I thought you might like

Dabi: Idk people r so weird about it when they find out

Dabi: And I didn’t want you to just talk to me because of that

Dabi: Especially when I found out u listen to our music

Dabi: I’m sorry I never told u

Dabi: Y/N? You there?

You: yeah I just

You: slightly confused

You: idk how to tell if ur lying or not

Dabi: [image attachment]

Dabi: Theres the face reveal you’ve been after

You: what the sigma

You: okay

You: woah

You: so I’ve actually been dming a celebrity

Dabi: You prefer me or Harry styles

You: you deffo

You: but I think you knew that from my messages from before

Dabi: Yeah i remember

Dabi: Dw you can articulate all the ways you need me after the show

You: haahahahhahaha

You: 😁😁😁 okay

Dabi: I have smth for you though

You: you do?

Dabi: Yeah

Dabi: Go to the back door where that scary security guy is

Dabi: His name is Spinner

Dabi: Tell him Dabi sent you

You: OKAY

You: :((( THIS IS SO CUTE

Dabi: You like them?

You: I can’t believe u got me flowers 😢

You: thank you!!!

Dabi: That’s alright

Dabi: Okay I need to go warm up

Dabi: I’ll be looking for you in the crowd

You: I’ll be staring at you too

Dabi: I said looking

You: same diff

You: wait hold on

Touya: What?

You: nm nm

You: good luck for ur show 😆

Touya: Thanks babe

BONUS

November 7th

5:05pm

Touya: Toga

Touya: Toga

Touya: Toga

Touya: TOGAAAAA

Toga: WTF DO U WANT

Touya: If I was gonna get a girl flowers what should I get her

Toga: GASP GASP

Toga: WHO R U RIZZING UP

Touya: Literally fuck off never say that

Toga: is this that girl you’re always messaging

Toga: and smiling at ur phone 🥺🥺

Touya: Fuck off

Toga: IT ISSSSSS

Toga: IS SHE COMING TONIGHT

Touya: Yes

Toga: AHHSSHAHWHW

Toga: THIS IS SO EXCITING

Touya: I’m so happy ur having so so much fun

Toga: I so ammmmmm

Toga: but why don’t u ask her what she wants

Touya: It’s a surprise idiot

Toga: AWWWWWWWW

Toga: okay well if u wanna be so really romantic u could get her roses

Toga: or maybeee tulips or lillies

Toga: she’ll like whatevs u get her

Touya: Okay

Touya: Thanks

Toga: that’s okay lover boy 😍🥰

Touya: Kys

—————————————————————————-

THIS WAS SO FUN TO WRITE OH EM GEE but it lowkey took longer than I thought it would… but i hope u all enjoyed 😁😁

also y/ns messaging is literally just how I message.. I fear this is the most self indulgent fic I’ve ever written

[allwaswell16]

A fic rec of One Direction fics where the main pairing has a one night stand or what they think will be a one night stand as requested in this ask. If you enjoy the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!

- Louis / Harry -

💜 You You You by @isthatyoularry

(M, 137k, famous/not famous) the one where Harry and Louis meet at a club and Louis takes Harry home, only for him to realize that the boy who just made him breakfast half naked is Harry Styles from One Direction.

💜 You Drive Me Round The Bend by TheCellarDoor / @donotdialnine

(M, 77k, hate to love) In which Louis is a spoilt rich kid who’s always on the phone while he drives and Harry is a struggling musician making his way down the mountain. It’s just a matter of time before they crash and burn.

💜 Know a Trick or Two by @sadaveniren

(E, 44k, Potter Direction) the one where Muggle Harry and Wizard Louis have a one night stand and get more than they bargained out of it.

💜 Baby, What a Big Surprise by kiwikero / @icanhazzalou

(E, 33k, high school) the one where shy, quiet Harry has no idea he's a carrier, and a one night stand with the most popular boy in school shows him just how wrong he was.

💜 You Wouldn't Believe the Dream I Just Had About You & Me by @larryatendoftheday

(E, 21k, friends to lovers) After a back-to-school bash and a few too many drinks, Harry finds himself pregnant from a one-night stand he doesn’t remember. His best friend Louis is the only one who knows about the baby. Together they try to find the father of Harry’s baby, but they keep looking in all the wrong places.

💜 Behind Smoke Stained Curtains by @jaerie

(E, 19k, omegaverse) The worlds align when Louis meets an alpha from the road with as many secrets as he holds himself.

💜 Souls; Plural, Parallel by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup

(T, 19k, soulmates) It's unfortunate then, that Louis finds out the hard way that he met his soulmate in a club, and the guy never texted him back.

💜 I Still Find You Lovely by @angelichl

(M, 16k, pwp) In which Harry goes to a bar in search of a bloke with an air-conditioned flat.

💜 Up All Night for Good Fun by @berzerkshires

(E, 13k, boss/employee) The man leaves his place before Harry wakes up, which makes him sad since it was the best sex he's ever had. But when he goes to his new job on Monday, he realizes the man he slept with is the CEO.

💜 Caught My Attention by kassio

(E, 13k, famous/not famous) Louis had been around long enough to know when someone was checking him out. He hadn’t expected to see that look from Harry fucking Styles.

💜 Night Out by @helloamhere

(E, 9k, omegaverse) Symphony hall was the first place Louis had felt at home in this city, and he always had the box to himself. Until tonight.

💜 One Minute Old by crimsontheory / @ireallysawanangel

(E, 9k, mpreg) a one-night stand of Louis' that he never thought he'd see again shows up at his door six months later.

💜 I Think I’m Addicted to Your Light by supernope

(E, 9k, pwp) He indicates his legs with the hand clutching a pale pink phone, and Louis’ gaze drops. Speechless, Louis takes the phone, eyes locked on the guy’s legs. His gorgeous legs, clad only in a pair of black thigh-highs held up by a silky black garter belt.

💜 You don't have to say you're mine by @softfonds

(M, 7k, Roman Holiday au) Harry thought they'd always have Rome, until fate gave them another chance.

💜 Rode Hard and Put Away Wet by @kingsofeverything

(E, 6k, size difference) Louis heard the same rumours in London, New York, and L.A., and he put them all to rest, but in Texas?

💜 All Good Things by @fallinglikethis

(E, 5k, famous/not famous) After a good show, popstar Harry likes to go out with his crew to blow off some steam. It must be his lucky night when he finds a pretty boy that's willing to help him out with that.

💜 Missed Chances by @harryanthus-annuus

(E, 5k, omegaverse) they get drunk on some expensive wine. Things escalate from there.

💜 Go With It by embro

(NR, 4k, pwp) "You thought I was someone else and started making out with me in a club and you're really hot so I just kinda went with it and now we're heading back to your place and I don't know how to break it to you"

💜 If You Don't Have To Go, Don't by @taggiecb

(E, 3k, famous/not famous) Louis just wants to have fun, and dance, and forget about everything is wrong in the world. He does just that in a crowded club in the middle of London. That is until he catches the eye of a beautiful green eyed stranger, and suddenly all of Louis' dance moves are for him.

- Rare Pairs -

💜 set the pace by flimsy

(E, 34k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw) “Do you think,” Nick says, “that we can keep this between us?” He gestures between himself and Louis and gives Louis a crooked smile like this is all explanatory, and Louis’ stomach twists uncomfortably.

💜 One by @allwaswell16

(E, 4k, Louis/Tommy Shelby) When omega Louis Tomlinson becomes pregnant after an unexpected encounter, he decides his only option is to flee his pack. But Tommy Shelby, pack alpha of the Peaky Blinders, might not be willing to let him go so easily.

[banggyu0308]

Berry Sorbet // Huening Kai

huening kai x fem!reader

summary: in which you share one of the five senses with your soulmate, and the taste of your lipgloss is on Kai's tongue all week.

genre: soulmate au, uni au, slight reincarnation au, non idol au, fluff, humor, skippable smut (will be marked by blue borders) (for your convenience, it is still sfw a little bit after the first border, just in case you don't see it. it is also slightly sfw before the last border, in case you don't scroll far enough)

warnings: cursing, both their friend groups are VERY annoying, some suggestive dialogue from said friends in friend groups (and a reference to taehyun being a tutor and occasionally making out w the people he tutors), some texting scenes, alcohol consumption, both kai and reader are idiots when it comes to their feelings, both kai and reader are very touchy-feely, mentions of kiss-like birthmarks, slight nudity (NOT IN A SEXUAL WAY AT ALL. you'll see when you get to it...)

word count: 9k

🎶 - LIP GLOSS (the boyz) + i don't understand but i luv u (seventeen) + watermelon sugar (harry styles)

an- happy twenty-first birthday hyuka ❤️ + if your name is Madelyne and you're a Tyun bias, i'm telepathic and this is for you

Kai's late. Or- almost. Sliding into his seat at the last minute was not what he had planned to do today, but it's what's ended up happening. His professor shoots him a sharp look over the other students heads, but turns back to the class without a word at his tardiness.

He puts his face in his hands and lets out a slow exhale, opening his notes to focus on the lecture instead of the thoughts running inside his head. His pencil scratches against the paper, his eraser squeaks slightly when he moves to get rid of a word, and the thoughts pause momentarily.

The girl seated in front of him raises her hand with what both Kai and the professor assume is a question, but is actually her CORRECTING what the professor has just told them. Kai expects the professor to get a little more than frustrated at being told she's wrong, but instead she's calm addressing the student. "Thank you for your contribution, Yn. I was unaware that this was a recent development of this topic, and I will further research and fact check it at a later time."

Yn looks up at the teacher with a smile. "I could email you my sources, if you want."

To Kai's surprise, his professor returns the smile, says, "Thank you very much," and continues on with her lesson.

He tries to focus again on the professor's words but a slight fruity taste settles on his tongue. That's strange- he didn't have any fruit today that he can think of.

Lunch break rolls around and as he takes a bite of his store-bought sandwich, he finds that instead of the sandwich's taste, it's the same fruity flavor that takes over his tastebuds.

It's subtle, but it's there, and it's a little annoying. Kai forces himself to finish half of his sandwich with a groan of annoyance, laying with his head in the crook of his arm once he's done.

He sits up to look around after a moment. The cafeteria is loud, but he can pick out some of the voices closest to him. There's Beomgyu, of course he's the loudest. Yeonjun's sitting next to him- they're arguing about something. Kai smiles slightly and shifts his gaze. They'll resolve whatever they're fighting about later. It's almost always something stupid.

Soobin meets Kai's gaze when it shifts to him instead, and without a word, stands and joins him at his table.

"Why are you sitting all alone?" He jokes with a soft smile. Even the small twitch of his lips sets off his dimple, and the expression makes Kai smile back.

"Just wasn't feeling it today. Here, try this... does it taste normal to you?"

Kai holds out the other half of the sandwich and Soobin takes a bite, food shifting to his cheek as he chews. He hands it back with a shrug. "Tastes normal to me."

"Not... fruity or anything?" Kai raises a confused eyebrow and Soobin shakes his head.

"Nope."

Kai stands and tosses the sandwich in the trash, lips pursed in frustration, and sits back down to pull out his phone. The situation is weird enough that he decides to google it, because his friend Soojin had been complaining about a weird taste in her mouth just weeks ago.

The first few articles are about food poisoning, of course, but the ones a little further down are almost all on the same topic, and suddenly it clicks in his brain.

Of course. Didn't Soojin tell him just last week that she'd found her soulmate, a girl in their class named Aurora?

You get linked to your soulmate at random times. Kai knows this. He just hadn't expected it to be, well, now? He's only twenty, he's still in college for pete's sake.

And now he has to figure out the next thing.

Who in hell was eating so much fruit???

You sit down with a sigh in the front of your classroom. You're early- punctuality is important.

Obviously, the boy sitting behind you doesn't know that. He's seated a split second before the bell rings and you resist a disapproving look his way. His bleached-blonde hair is grown out slightly, mussed in the back like he just rolled out of bed. Jeez, your class isn't even that early...

He's quiet all throughout class, something you notice, although it's not a surprise. If class participation were a grade, he'd fail. You're pretty sure you've only heard him talk once.

The sweet taste of your lipgloss is still slightly unfamiliar when you swipe your tongue over your lips, and you apply another coat with one slick movement. The girl next to you looks at you with a question in her eyes, and you show her the lip gloss tube momentarily before turning back to the lecture.

The class ends with only one incident: a case of misinformation, which you swiftly correct. Lunch is next, and your lipgloss smears pink on your napkin when you wipe it off. Your mouth still tastes like it slightly when you bite into your apple, but it's fine.

You've packed yourself a normal lunch and when you finish, you check the time. Aw shit.

You almost run to your next class, which luckily goes by like a flash; it's one of your easiest ones.

Your next class is one you've just started and you're unfamiliar with. Both the classmates and the actual concept itself are new to you, and you look up from your notes to find the teacher's paired you with the boy from earlier. Instead of your look of annoyance from before, you send a small smile his way.

It's received and returned, and he finds his seat next to you. "I'm Kai," he says, a slight nervous note to his voice. You smile again.

"I'm Yn, nice to finally meet you for real, Kai."

You've been aware of him, of course. One of your best friend's is practically obsessed with one of HIS friends, Taehyun, which means you've spent many a lunch break observing the group, all for Madelyne's sake.

When Kai leans over you slightly to look at your notes, you catch a slight scent of something that almost smells like baby powder. You smile to yourself- it reminds you of your family.

It is strange, though, the way the smell of him lingers even after your numbers are exchanged, after the class ends, after you go back to your room for the day...

And still there when a text from him lights up your phone.

huening project partner 📖🖊️ i forgot to ask this but, could you send me a copy of your notes? i'm not good at remembering things without looking at them

You laugh slightly at this, take a few photos of each one of your sheets of notes, and send it to him.

you is that all you need?

huening project partner 📖🖊️ yes, thank you 🙏 well... no.

you what else? the punctuation is scaring me

huening project partner 📖🖊️ NO DON'T BE SCARED OF MY PUNCTUATION 😭 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY I PUT IT IN THE FIRST PLACE 😭

you NO NO ITS OKAY I WAS MAKING A JOKE BECAUSE NONE OF MY FRIEND EVER USE PERIODS AT THE END OF OUR SENTENCES AHSBHWBS 😭

huening project partner 📖🖊️ wait really???????? taehyun usually does, the smarty-pants he is (can't be normal like the rest of us...) but it makes him seem like a really dry texter 😭

you exactly why we DON'T most of my friends are already dry asf when it comes to texting punctuation makes it worse

huening project partner 📖🖊️ i'm sure your friends cannot be worse than taehyun-

you BIANCA IS SO BAD AT IT ISTG like over here you and i are having a conversation and i don't just think you're sitting on the other end like an npc

huening project partner 📖🖊️ ... you're welcome?

you 😭😭😭 IT DID FEEL LIKE IM THANKING YOU FOR NOT BEING BORING 😭 THANK YOU FOR NOT BEING BORING!!!!! AND NOT BEING AN NPC!!!!

huening project partner 📖🖊️ YOU'RE WELCOME!!!! and thank YOU!!!!

you oh my goodness i cannot breathe right nowwww 😭 madelyne is looking at me like i'm CRAZY

huening project partner 📖🖊️ ...is she wrong though....

you HEY!!! YOU'RE NEW!!! YOU DON'T GET TO DISS ME LIKE THAT JUST YET but tbh takes one to know one 🤭

huening project partner 📖🖊️ exactly, you idiot/lh sorry that was mean 😊 goodnight now, i don't even remember why i was texting you in the first place, no way i'm doing homework at 1am 😭

you well, me neither, even though i am right now goodnight kai :) i think i'm going to enjoy being partners with you

You're cleaning in a rush, throwing things into bins, under your bed, under MADELYNE'S bed, but to be honest, who cares right now??? You'd known Kai'd be over today but it didn't hit you until this morning, THIRTY MINUTES BEFORE HE SHOWS UP, and now, rightfully so, you're in a panic.

You're shoving the last thing into your drawer right as there's a knock at the door. "Coming!!"

You take a moment to dab at your sweaty face and smooth your hair in the slightest. You reach a hand and turn the doorknob, swallowing the little anxiety crawling its way up your throat. "Hello hello!!" You grin at him, taking him by the shoulder and leading him in. "Welcome to my humble abode."

In any other circumstance, you'd be joking. But your room was quite literally the definition of 'humble', even after you cleaned up slightly. You'd done the best you could when you first moved in, adding dainty, pastel curtains that reminded you of fairies, other little details to your bed and side table, but it was hard to cover up the fact of how old this room really was.

Kai cracks a small smile and bends to take his laptop from his bag. You do the same. He joins you on the edge of your bed a moment later and it's all but silent, the only sound the clicking of your keyboards. Not that you mind!! You know the best way to get things done is in silence, for you at least.

He breaks it a moment later, leaning slightly to point at your screen. "I was thinking we could put this over here?"

His chin is practically on your shoulder and you nod slightly, dragging the text box to the other side of the screen. You look up to a loud bang, jumping slightly, which knocks your face into Kai's just as Madelyne walks in.

"OH-!" Her face is a devious grin when she looks at you two. "What do we have here~?"

You quickly shove yourself away from Kai, face hot. "This-" You gesture pointedly at him. "Is my partner on a project for school. Kai, Madelyne. Madelyne, Kai."

"Hey," Kai says. Other than a slightly embarrassed smile on his face, he doesn't look uncomfortable otherwise, and you let out a small breath of relief. The last thing you needed right now was your partner uncomfortable with you.

You stand and push Madelyne away, not leaving room for silence, and say, "Alright, goodbye now!"

Once she leaves again with a backwards glance to you and a "It's my room too," you flop back onto the bed.

"I'm sorry she's like that," you apologize, face buried in one of your pillows.

"No, it's alright, I really don't mind. My friends are the same way. Taehyun's a tutor, for crying out loud, we all know what he gets up to."

A wry grin is sent your direction when you lift your head again, and you have a split second thought of 'I should sign Madelyne up for Taehyun to tutor.' She'd love you forever if you did.

"Thank god," you smile back, settling back in front of your computer, a little closer to Kai this time.

Introduction to your best friend: check.

Maybe this whole project thing won't be so bad.

Kai is surprised when you sit next to him during your Monday class, and even more surprised when, halfway through your lesson, you lean over to invite him back to your room soon.

He barely processes the words coming from your mouth. He's too focused on the fact that now that you're this close, he can smell your lipgloss, and it's all too familiar to him. It almost exactly matches what he's been tasting on his tongue for almost two weeks.

When he gets out of class, his mind is still running with thoughts tripping over themselves. WHY would he be tasting your lip gloss? When he didn't even know you? And why, the same day he does, does he get partnered with you for your project?

He plops onto his bed with a small sigh. His phone is alight with multiple messages from Yeonjun, asking where he was.

3:57PM

yeonjun 🙄/j KAIIIIIII DID YOU FORGET TO MEET US :((

kai well... yes. sorry?

yeonjun 🙄/j You SHOULD be sorry, you meanie >:( WHAT is so important that you would forget????

kai what does it mean when you can taste a girls lip gloss but you've never kissed her or another girl with the same lipgloss?

yeonjun 🙄/j you're not making any sense i don't think it can be the same lipgloss then, or even lipgloss, if you've never kissed or anything

kai yeah... i guess that makes sense sorry for bothering you XD

yeonjun 🙄/j no no it's alright!! who's the girl?

kai you know yn..? super smart, takes a few classes with me, has the friend who's infatuated with taehyun?

yeonjun 🙄/j OH HERRRRR OMG yes i know her!! do you like her?

kai i- NO?????? I WAS JUST ASKING BECAUSE

yeonjun 🙄/j because...?

kai nothing

yeonjun 🙄/j you totally like her.

kai i don't

yeonjun 🙄/j mhmmmm anyways, are you gonna meet us or not?

kai not i've got work to do

yeonjun 🙄/j fine.

4:11PM

yeonjun 🙄/j and one more question... do you have her number?

kai yes...?

yeonjun 🙄/j can i have it?

kai why?? do YOU like her?

yeonjun 🙄/j no i don't can i have it?

kai fine...

kai shared a contact: yn

4:23PM

kai YEONJUN NOT FUCKING COOL YEONJUN AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I HATE YOU I HATE YOU SO MUCH WHY WOULD YOU AJHBVSHJABSJWBSUWBDSUW

yeonjun 🙄/j thought you didn't like her 🤭

You have no idea what just happened.

First of all, WHO added you to this group thread? Why are you here??

And second of all, Kai was one hundred percent right. Why does Taehyun text like that????

4:20PM

unknown added yn

unknown HIIIII

you who. the FUCK. are you?????

unknown WOAH CALM DOWN CALM DOWN LANGUAGE >:((

unknown beomgyu, you know you're just the same. 🙄

you okay, so i know ONE person here, i guess... WHO ADDED ME????

unknown me!! the one who said hi first..?

beomgyu 🐻 that's yeonjun

you see, that's all i needed FUCKING NAMES

jjun 🙄 IM SORRY ALRIGHT???? I DIDNT THINK ABT NAMES????

unknown you never think.

you that is totally, 100% taehyun

unknown ... correct. and scary.

taehyun 😏 i feel nervous now.

you dont be kai told me abt y'all so :D

huening project partner 📖🖊️ i did huh?

you oh HIIIII is soobin here too then?

unknown that's me <3 hi yn

you hi soob!! now, WHY am i here? and why does yeonjun have my number?

huening project partner 📖🖊️ that's my fault jjun asked ;-;

you and OFC you had to give in, because it's yeonjun, right? 🙄

huening project partner 📖🖊️ he's hard to say no to i didn't think he'd do this!!

you it's fine it's fine so. how is everyone?

soob soob ❤️ im good!

taehyun 😏 eh. could be better.

jjun 🙄 he's being dramatic, he's fine so am i

beomgyu 🐻 im good too!!!

huening project partner 📖🖊️ ... bad :D

you whats wrong hyuka? :((

huening project partner 📖🖊️ yeonjun :D

you ah, i see we should just get rid of him, shouldn't we?

jjun 🙄 you can't just get rid of me??? i MADE the gc therefore, by law, i CANNOT be removed!!

you i'm sure you thought this through beforehand ;-;

soob soob ❤️ he totally did

jjun 🙄 i did NOT so anyways :D yn, how is your project w kai going? 😏😏

huening project partner 📖🖊️ the emojis are SO unnecessary

jjun 🙄 that's why i used them, kai

beomgyu 🐻 he is nothing but unnecessary

you 🤭 BEOMGYU WE SHOULD HANG OUT

beomgyu 🐻 i've always thought you match my energy :D let's do it :D ... if huening doesn't steal you away...

you he wouldn't dare >:(( would you, kai?

huening project partner 📖🖊️ ...no?

taehyun 😏 LMAO.

soob soob ❤️ kai needs to be reminded he doesn't own yn

huening project partner 📖🖊️ I do NOT?????

jjun 🙄 mhm sureeee 🙄

you i feel like *I* should be the one who's scared here...

huening project partner 📖🖊️ NO YOU'RE FINE

beomgyu 🐻 we're completely normal :D

you that was the last straw the grinning emoji says otherwise GOODBYE-

'hey, it's kai... was wondering if we could spend some study time in the library together sometime soon? just to do a little extra research, plus it's quiet and that way neither of us need to worry about hosting and cleaning and stuff. call me or text me when you get this. bye.'

You put your phone facedown on the table after listening to the voicemail. It's not that you don't WANT to study with him, in fact you probably NEED to, it's just that you hadn't planned for it. Today or any day. But honestly, today would probably work best... so, you text him back.

you i could do today!! project's due in a week anyways, so it's probably a good time to finalize some stuff and practice presenting.

huening project partner 📖🖊️ okay!! I'll bring my stuff in 15?

you sounds good!! see you then

You grab your books and your computer, shove them in your backpack, and make your way to the library. It seems as if Kai's borrowed your punctuality today- he's there when you show up.

That's new, but he doesn't bring it up to you, only waving you over to his table. "Alright, so, we should divvy up the actual presentation bit, and then I can double check the slides I'm working on, and then you can do the ones you are?"

You smile and nod, logging into your computer and opening the shared Powerpoint.

The two of you are working peacefully in silence, side by side at your desk, until you hear whispered giggling. Now, usually you'd roll your eyes at the disruption and ignore it, but the giggles sound too familiar.

Except... it wouldn't make sense for that to be the laughter you hear. There's more than one voice, and it sounds a lot like Beomgyu, Yeonjun... and Bianca and Madelyne??

Two more voices who, until then, had been unheard, grow louder to shush the others, and you place who they belong to when you see two sets of dark eyes and dark hair peeking from behind a bookshelf.

Funny that Soobin and Taehyun are trying to be the ones to keep the others quiet, but are also the ones that get them seen.

You duck your head and try to ignore them. You don't alert Kai to exactly what his friends are up to, or the fact that your friends are with them too... how the heck did that even HAPPEN??? You bet Madelyne's feeling VERY happy right now, you can tell everyone's pushed up against everyone behind that bookshelf.

One whisper cuts through the others, louder than the rest. "Guys, they look kinda cute together..."

Your head jolts up at the sound and Kai looks over at you in concern, but you shake your head. "Nothing, thought I heard something..."

When he turns back to his computer, you side-eye him, scanning him in a way you hope is subtle. Your gaze catches on a scattering of moles across his neck, a few on his cheeks too, but the ones on his neck catch your eyes the most. It almost seems like there are lip-stick marks on them, and you feel something that almost feels like jealousy in the pit of your stomach. Someone's obviously gotten to him recently and done exactly what had flicked through your brain a second ago.

But then again... When you lean closer, pretending to itch your leg, you notice that said marks are faint and almost match his skin tone, which throws you off. There are a few just like that smattered across your own body too, and they've been there since as long as you can remember.

Now you're curious.

"Kai?" You ask, facing your computer and whispering out of the corner of your mouth.

"Mm?"

"Are those birthmarks? Around the moles on your neck?"

He looks at you quickly, a faint blush on his cheeks. "They are, actually... most people assume they're like, hickies or something? They're not, though. So."

You smile at him, tugging the collar of your shirt down so he can see the few on your own neck. "I have some other places too. My mom says they're where your soulmate kissed you most in your past life, which makes me a little suspicious of my soulmate's preferences." Your smile turns a little wry, and then you look away.

"Mine too, actually," he smiles to himself. "A lot on my moles, which are a lot of places, so..."

Your eyes widen at both the whisper of "they look like they're gonna kiss..." coming from the bookshelves and the thought running through your head of wanting to press your own lips to his moles, regardless of their placements. His soulmate was one relatable bastard.

You stand quickly, shoving your things in your bag, and murmur a small apology of your quick departure to Kai. No doubt he'll think he'd driven you off with his confession, but that works for you. No need to tell him the real reason.

You hear multiple groans of annoyance when you pass the bookshelf your friends are behind, and you slam your hand against it for a quick second, sending a glare to whoever's eyes you meet on the other side.

You'll be having words with them all later.

WHY couldn't they let you have your words with them????

Madelyne inviting Bianca to your dorm the next day was practically the perfect opportunity to chew them both out. You'd already gotten mad at the others on the group chat (you're sure Yeonjun regrets adding you).

But!! Before you can even open your mouth to say something, they're both pulling open your drawers and closet doors, throwing clothes at you. You're stunned into silence until a sock flies into your mouth, which you spit out, and yell, "WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING?????"

They both pause and look at you with confused expressions. "Did you not get our texts? We've sent, like, thirty in the past 10 minutes," Bianca says. Her hands are full with a few of your skirts that you've shoved in the back of your closet, and you snatch them from her.

"OBVIOUSLY not? What did you say????"

When neither respond, gesturing to your phone, you open it and read through. "I am NOT going to a party. No way. I've got things to do!"

Madelyne rolls her eyes. "Yn. This is your second year in college and you haven't been to a single party."

"I have!!" you protest, moving to shove your clothes back in the drawers.

"Katie Milewicz's birthday party does not count."

"Whether it counts or not, I'm NOT going to this one!"

"What if we told you all the guys will be there and you can bash them about the library incident?" Bianca's smooth voice chimes in with Madelyne's, and it makes you look up momentarily.

"Fine. It'll be fun to do it in person." You sigh in defeat, then grab one of your pairs of jeans and a T-shirt. "But I am NOT dressing up!!"

"There we go..." They both grin at you and wait outside the bathroom as you change and do your hair. Taking your hands and dragging you to the dorm where said party is being held, you press your lips closed in frustration.

When you open the door, it feels like a wall has hit you. A wall that is far too loud, smells like alcohol, and feels like a heat wave.

"On second thought... I might just stay out here." You turn from the door, a little overwhelmed, but Madelyne tugs you back to it.

"I promise it's not as bad when you get inside, okay? And we can find you a corner you can hang out in, with a drink or without."

You take a deep breath, making sure to let it out as a frustrated sigh, but you allow them to bring you inside.

Almost every face is unfamiliar to you, and you suddenly understand the meaning of the phrase 'this is not my crowd'. Remembering Bianca's words from earlier, you peer around for Kai and his friends, but the room is so filled, you have no hopes of spotting them.

You grab a coke and retreat to a corner, so close to it that your hip is pressed right where the two walls meet. Even in your little solitary area, you're bumped up against every now and then.

You hate it, you hate this.

Someone's hand finds your waist momentarily and that's it, you're out of here. You have to finish your project anyways, both you and Kai are counting on you for this.

Turning from the wall to find the doorway, you're met with the first familiar face you've seen all night, the person said face belongs to moving some dude away from you.

"Hey," Kai says, slightly breathless, and he leans against the wall next to you. Your heartbeat spikes at his proximity, and you swallow slightly, moving backwards away from him just the slightest.

He looks just as out of place as you, but the one thing that catches your eye is how someone's angled their colored phone light just right so that it somehow catches Kai's hair, making it look like a blue halo. You giggle slightly at it, and you double check your cup to make sure you haven't accidentally given yourself something that's not coke.

A smile crosses Kai's expression and it makes your heart flutter again, moving a little closer to him.

"So." You say in his ear, loud enough that he can hear but no one else can. "How'd you get here?"

"Do I really look that out of place?" He says in your own ear, lips brushing against your skin, and you swear you feel an actual spark. You feel a sudden need to have him closer, but you ignore it, smiling up at him. "One hundred percent. So who dragged you here?"

"Two guesses."

"Hmm... Yeonjun and Taehyun?"

"Close. Yeonjun and Beomgyu."

"Damn. Maybe me and Beomgyu are less similar than I thought."

"Maybe you're more similar to Soobin... it seems like the two of you get along well."

The way he's looking at you makes you feel like you've done something wrong, even though you know you haven't. What IS that?

Whatever it is, it renders you completely tongue tied, and Kai can tell. "Should we get out of here?"

You can only nod, and when he takes your hand to drag you out, you definitely feel something stirring inside you this time.

He stops just outside of the room, close enough that if someone came looking for you two, they'd be able to find you. You both slump against the wall and slide down it, sitting on the floor. Your sides are pressed close, and the writhing under your skin is only growing the longer he's touching you.

"What were you saying?" You ask, and now it's your turn to sound breathless.

"Oh, nothing... Something about you and Soobin getting on?"

"Oh, yeah. We went to middle school together. It's not like we were ever close, but it's like we have one familiar face from our childhood, you know?"

Your hand feels like it's moving of its own accord, playing with Kai's hair when he leans his head on your shoulder. "I get it. Me and my friend Soojin's girlfriend, Aurora, are like that. She was in my eighth grade class."

You nod slightly, your eyes shutting, and your hand slips farther down to his back. You can feel where his waist dips to his hips through his t-shirt and you press your fingers right there gently.

Your mind feels so fuzzy, you swear you feel like you're drunk. You don't know what possesses you to kiss Kai, but you know the moment you do that there's no way you can ever stop. His lips are soft, pressing against yours so perfectly, it's like you were made for each other. You're giggling into the kiss, eyes wide open, and you know that's a weird way to kiss someone, but you don't want to miss a single thing about his expression right now. His hair tickles your forehead and you can feel his breath on your cheek, along with his eyelashes, but it's perfect.

It's absolutely, 100% perfect.

When he breaks the kiss, forehead against yours, you don't allow space to say anything, tugging him back into the dorm and to the bathroom. You have him against the wall, lips against his, against his neck, the bit of collarbone that peeks from the collar of his shirt... there's a primal need deep inside you to have your lips on his and it's insatiable, tugging you back to him for more more more, and the way he's responding you can tell he can feel it too.

Kai lowers his head to press soft kisses against your neck, one after another, and someone pounds their fist against the door after attempting to turn the locked knob.

You only giggle, and a voice follows the knock. "Are you screwing in there?"

Kai lets out a surprised and amused breath at the incorrect assumption. One last kiss to your jawline that does nothing to quell the need of his lips and he's dragging you back out of the bathroom and to his room, and let's just say... there's no need to worry about him not kissing you tonight.

The sun is too bright.

That's your first thought when you wake up with a splitting headache, in a room that is very unfamiliar to you. You feel so horrible that you'd think you'd had at least three drinks last night.

You look around the room to find Kai asleep on the floor in a tangle of blankets. With his tall frame, the sight is almost funny. But it's also your only relief about what the last night consisted of, because waking up in his clothes had put more than a few running thoughts inside your head. At least now you can have a feeling nothing happened.

But looking at Kai and knowing what you did last night, what the both of you did... you have to get out of here. You can't change out of the clothes, but you grab yours and your shoes, and you quietly leave the room, heading back to your dorm.

Madelyne and Bianca are waiting there, surprisingly sober, although they look a lot like they hadn't slept at all last night. Bianca's usually perfectly-picked afro is smushed on one side and not the other, like she'd laid on it all night, and Madelyne's makeup is smeared all over her face.

"Oh, thank God you're okay!" They both fling themselves up from the bed and into your arms, then pause and take in your current state. "Are you okay?"

You nod quickly. "I just slept over at Kai's."

Bianca looks at Madelyne with a sly grin, then back at you. "Mhmmmm..."

You roll your eyes, then head to the fridge to get a bottle of water. "Did you guys get any sleep last night?"

"Not a wink."

Madelyne seems almost proud to admit her commitment to worrying about you, but it only makes your heart hurt. You were so busy with Kai you hadn't even sent them a text to explain.

"Guys... I'm sorry, I should've told you I was leaving. It won't happen again."

You look down at your feet while you say it, cheeks hot with embarrassment, and Madelyne pulls you into a hug by your arm. "Hey, yn, it's alright, okay? We're fine, you're fine, everyone's fine."

"That's true." You smile a little, then take a sip of your water. "I'm gonna lay down, okay? Let me know if Kai texts, I may have left without telling him..."

You're not afraid of leaving your phone with them. A, because they don't know your password, and B, because they're your best friends in the whole wide world and you trust them.

The water helps your headache go down and you're nodding off to sleep when your friends barge in. "He texted!!!"

You groan and fling your arm out for your phone. "Gimme..."

Bianca puts it in your hand and giggles slightly, bumping hips with Madelyne.

huening project partner 📖🖊️ hey, just wanted to check in after last night since you didn't tell me you were leaving... is everything all right? text or call me when you get this <3

You put your face in your hands with a sigh, and drop your phone on the side of the bed. "Not right now. Too much thinking involved in responding."

"He sent you a heeEeEeeEaaRrrT!" Madelyne giggles, raising her eyebrows repeatedly.

"Because. We kissed. And kissed again. And again. AND AGAIN. And now I don't want to talk to him because I don't have the emotional capacity, so please leave me alone right now."

You pout at them at your last sentence and then roll over in your bed, signifying the end of your conversation.

You'll text him later, of course you will. You just need to find a way to think with your brain, not your lips, because there's an actual ache inside you that needs him next to you.

You don't text him later. It's not your fault you slept for hours, and then went to eat lunch and go to an arcade and then got dinner and went back to sleep!! But you forgot that your presentation is tomorrow, and now, standing next to Kai at the front of the room, it's more than a little awkward.

You can see a littering of kiss marks on his neck and wonder how they even showed up like that. But that's not the point right now. The point is that you need to recite this presentation but your mind is blank. It's like every time Kai steps closer to you, something from him makes you go dizzy and numb and unable to form normal human words.

It doesn't seem like he's fairing much better... he keeps looking behind him at the presentation, which is bullet-pointed to keep it small, instead of the full paragraphs you were supposed to memorize.

Finally ending the project, you're more than a little relieved. It was not good, at all. You'd be surprised if you got anything higher than a B. You're more frustrated than mad at the result of your work. You both worked hard on this, you know you did. Things just happened at the wrong times and messed everything else up.

You're ready to leave at the end of class, but the teacher stops both you and Kai. They lean over their desk to whisper to you, even though the rest of the class is gone, and their dark silver hair catches the light just so to make it look like it's sparkling.

"Yn, Kai... I don't know what happened today, but I trust that it was something bad enough to cause this, because I am genuinely surprised at your outcome of this project. I saw the two of you working on it together. The Powerpoint was done very well. But the actual oral part of your presentation... was not. And for that, I can't give you any higher than a C-."

They look genuinely apologetic when they usher you out of the room, and when Kai tries to say something to you, you brush past him and head to your room. Thank god that was your last class of the day... you have no idea if you could've handled having any more after that disaster.

You're not necessarily... upset, so to say. Right now, you just feel in shock. Shocked that you let something as stupid as making out with your partner on this project give you a C-.

Your plan is already in action when you fall into the comfort of your bed: let it sink in, cry, sleep, eat, sleep, sleep.

You're just getting comfortable, tucking yourself under your covers and wrapping them around you, when a sharp, burning sensation on your neck makes you hiss through your teeth. You swat at your neck. Is it a bug??? When you feel nothing there, yet the burning doesn't cease, you groan and get out of your bed, trudging to your bathroom.

You look in the mirror, tug down your shirt's neckline, and-

"What the fuck is that???"

You have lines of bright red kiss marks on your neck, like some sort of fucking rash, and every time you touch them they start stinging. The sting must be getting to your head because the first thing you think of is, 'does kai have some sort of weird poison on his lips???'

You giggle at your own thoughts, take a photo of your neck, and send him a text saying just that.

huening project partner 📖🖊️ funny, i was just thinking the same about you can you come over, please? it's really really important

You almost type no, but then the sting turns to an ache that you can feel in the pit of your stomach, and you hit send.

you yes

The moment you open the door it feels like the ache is tugging you towards Kai by a string, like you're some sort of puppet. The moment your palm meets his shoulder, the burn on your throat ceases and a small gasp leaves your lips.

"This is not normal," you mumble, pressing a kiss to his lower lip.

"Not at all," he agrees, lips finding yours when you part.

Your gaze drops to his neck to find the remnants of your kisses from the night before. "So then... It's been happening to you too?"

He nods, one hand on your cheek, and when he kisses you again, it feels like your heart is being wrenched from your chest. In a good way.

"I- please, do that again?" You whisper, chest pressed against his.

He complies with no protest, his breath shaking against your skin.

The burn is less, but still there, and you remember something you've read. "Kai?"

"Hm?"

"I think... I think you're my soulmate."

He smiles at you and kisses you again. "Yeah, I've been figuring the same thing. It hurts, doesn't it?"

For a moment, you think he's talking about finding out who your soulmate is, but then you realize he's referring to each of the kisses burning against your skin. "It does.. do you know what we're supposed to do?"

He nods, and lowers his lips to your neck again. You smile to yourself at the fact that he knows, and quickly tug your shirt off, followed by your shorts, and he follows suit. Moments later, you're laying side-by-side in his bed, and, just as everything you've read has promised, when his bare skin meets you, the burn disappears completely.

And, well, with that taken care of, you go back to kissing him with a small giggle. You're more than a little surprised at finding your soulmate and you can tell Kai is too, his heartbeat fluttering under your palm.

His skin is smooth beneath your fingers, and you barely process when your lips lower to mark it, sucking splotchy purple hickeys across the broad plane of his chest. Kai shudders slightly when you do, and you look up at him, nervous you made a mistake.

He shakes his head the slightest, closing his eyes briefly. "I'm just... getting used to how it feels when you touch me."

Your cheeks grow hot. You thought it was just you who noticed, the way everything gets a little warmer when his body is touching yours.

The burn under your skin returns when you move away from him slightly, and when you gasp, Kai tugs you back down onto him, a little smile dancing across his face. "I think we're gonna have to stay like this for a while..~"

There's a teasing note to his voice that wasn't there just a second ago, and it makes you do a double take to be sure this was the same shy boy who smelled (and still smells) like baby powder. "I don't think I'll mind~"

His cheeks go pink, like he hadn't expected you to flirt back at all. It makes you laugh, the flustered look on his face that makes it seem like he's forgotten that you're in his bed, practically naked.

You press your forehead to his and leave a small kiss on one of the moles on his cheek. Kai's hands move to your hips, moving you just a little bit so you're situated on his stomach, and the way he looks up at you through the pieces of hair in his face makes your breath catch. This man right here wants you, needs you, and it's so blatantly obvious from the look in his eye that you have no idea if he's messing with you or not.

You tentatively move your hips back so you're straddling him, and run a slow hand down his torso, and when he closes his eyes, you can feel the emotions radiating off of him in your own body. That's new.

His emotions feel so warm, like he's happy just being here with you, and he almost feels like he's mentally nuzzling you when you run a hand through his hair. "I think I like this..." you murmur, laying down on top of him and looping your arms under his back. You note the way his head falls immediately to the crook of your neck, not to give you any more kisses, but just to breathe you.

He whines when you sit back up, but the moment your lips meet his again, you can feel him go fuzzy, like he can't quite think straight when you're kissing him, and... well, you're almost completely sure that he can feel you feeling the same way.

"Kai, I..." You try to catch your breath when he breaks the kiss, but he chases your lips so desperately that you can't help but fall back into him.

A soft whimper from him surprises you, and, if even possible, you feel his mind go even fuzzier. Dizzy too, almost. Like his head has gone underwater and everything he's hearing has gone muffled, along with everything he says, too.

"Wan', please?" he hums, lips finding your neck again.

You almost ask what he wants, but you can feel it, and your cheeks grow hot before you oblige, your hand slipping beneath his boxers to take him in your hands. His tip is dribbling clear precum when you tug his boxers down, and when you stroke him once, you can feel the pleasure coursing through his body.

The achy burn is back, a little more fervent, like some sort of primal animal instinct, and it needs him closer, more, this close is nowhere near close enough, and before you can even comprehend it, you're whispering in Kai's ear and he's nodding and you notice that the burn only goes away completely once he's inside you.

Oh fuck.

It's not like you haven't done this before. It's not like you haven't enjoyed doing it before. But nothing has ever come even close to this. You can feel him, not just inside you but around you and with you and everything else. It's like every other time you've had sex all pushed into one thing and multiplied by ten.

And it's not just your experience you're feeling, it's like you're in Kai's head and not only feeling what you're feeling but also what it feels like to him. How it feels to be inside you. The same experience, backwards.

People have told you how much better it feels with your soulmate, but you just scoffed. How is something going to feel better with some random person you have a connection with?

But now you understand.

It's not just some random hookup with some random person. Nowhere near that at all. It's with someone who feels both new and familiar because you've crossed lifetime after lifetime together and now you've finally found each other again. It's like kissing someone that you know you can give up all control to, and they'd still hold you and take care of you and it just feels right.

You can tell Kai's new to this. His body is at an awkward angle beneath you, his arms looped over your legs, and his eyes are squeezed tightly shut. You can hear his shaky inhales and exhales, and his lips curl into a soft smile when you press a small kiss to them.

"Good?" You ask, and you can tell without him answering that yes, he's feeling very good, indeed.

"Very... 've never before, didn't know it felt like this..."

You giggle, which comes out wrong with how fucking breathless you feel, the burn of the kisses on your neck replaced by the burn in your thighs. "Trust me... doesn't usually feel like this."

He laughs, a quiet sound, his hips rocking up against yours. "'M I that good?"

"Ah, I don't know about that..." You tease, licking up the side of his neck. You smirk when his hands find purchase on your ass, moving you up and down in time with his thrusts, but the cocky look on your face slips when you feel him hit that spongy spot inside you, gummy walls tightening around him desperately.

Kai hisses through his teeth, then smiles up at you. "What were you just saying~?"

You smack him on his shoulder. "Shut up."

"What was that? Sorry, couldn't hear you over the sounds you're making~" He gives you a shit-eating grin that reminds you oh-so-much of his friend.

"You're acting like Beomgyu. Maybe I should take your favorite plushies and give them to him, considering you've swapped personalities today."

He feigns a shocked expression. "You would never!!!"

"I would!"

"You know... I could totally take my dick out right now and make you go back to your dorm.."

Contrary to his words, he only quickens his pace, repeatedly hitting the spot that makes your breath hitch. "Please don't."

"Hm? What was that~?"

"Don't stop, please, 'm so close, Kai..."

"Thought you said I wasn't good..." He catches your earlobe in his teeth briefly before his face falls to your neck, breathy pants against your skin betraying his facade.

You pull away from him and he whines slightly, looking up at you with a pout. "I think you should stop talking and just make me cum, Hyuka."

"I thought, ah, you liked when i- fuck- when i talk..."

"Mmm... debatable." You smirk down at him and the cocky smile plastered on an otherwise fucked-out face. The poor boy has tears wetting his lashes from your combined pleasure, his cheeks flushed.

"However, I do like this," you add, hands gripping at his upper arms. "I like this a lot."

"If you wanted me to shut up, then w-why are you talking to me?"

"I decided that actually, I'd rather hear you try to talk to me while you cum."

His eyes go wide at that, blonde hair plastered to his forehead with sweat. "I- I, ah, I-"

"'I, I, I,'" You mock, pursing your lips into a pitying pout. "Are you even trying?"

He nods pathetically, hands tightening on your hips. "I can't, I, feels so, so-" Kai cuts himself off with a whimper, hips twitching up against yours in a desperate attempt to pull himself closer to the edge.

"How does it feel, baby?" You coo, looking at him with wide, innocent eyes.

"Jus', ah, just wan' cum, 'm so close, feels so good, yn..."

A wide smile spreads its way over your lips, and your eyes narrow, almost like you're a predator looking at its prey. "See, baby? Wasn't that easy? That's all I wanted..."

He nods quickly, a watery sob pulled from his chest, and you press a soft kiss to his awaiting lips. "Doing so good, alright? Making me feel perfect, so so good."

Kai nods again, his breath shuddering in and out against your neck, his torso tensing up before his warm cum spurts inside you, cutting off whatever words you were about to say because holy shit, you can feel it. Not his cum painting the walls of your cunt, but the sheer ecstasy in his body from the force of his orgasm.

It's so overwhelming that you feel as if you might pass out when your own high washes over you. You go limp against Kai, cheek against his chest because all you can feel right now is exhaustion.

His arms lazily wrap around you, holding you close, and you roll off of his dick and onto the bed next to him, still panting. "So."

"So?"

You smile up at him, left hand running through his hair. "That was fun, right?"

"Very fun. I don't think I'm gonna be able to recover for another few hours."

You laugh, nuzzling into his neck. "I don't think so, either. If ever. I think I get the hype behind finding your soulmate now."

"Yeah? Did your super-awesome-amazing-boyfriend-slash-soulmate convince you of that?"

"Who said you were my boyfriend? Maybe I just fucked you because you're cute and you're my soulmate and now I'm going to ditch you for Soobin."

"Why is it always Soobin??? What obsession do you have with Soobin???" He looks genuinely hurt, and you stifle a laugh.

"I'm not obsessed with him, you idiot. I'm obsessed with my super-awesome-amazing-boyfriend-slash-soulmate who convinced me to enjoy having him as a soulmate."

This is new to you, unfamiliar territory. You've never walked into class holding hands with anyone, let alone your soulmate. Madelyne and Bianca are hovering behind you both the whole time, squealing and giggling and occasionally whisper-yelling their brand new shipname just for you and Kai.

And as for SooTaeJunGyu... when you happened to let a casual message to Kai slip out in the groupchat, they were quick to pick up on it and even quicker to realize you two were not just dating, but soulmates. (You still regret them finding out this way.)

Beomgyu's been the most annoying, as expected, posting whiny messages about how you spend all your time with Kai, and remember what you said about hanging out with him?

Of course, you haven't forgotten... it just so happens that every time you're away from Kai for more than a few hours, his most recent kisses start to burn again. Which means, wherever you go, Kai goes if you're going to be there for longer than two hours.

Kai gives your hand a gentle squeeze, still unsure of how much PDA you want, but when you give him a quick peck on the cheek, he goes slightly pink.

Your professor only smiles at your linked hands when you enter the classroom. They'd had more than an inkling of your connection, which is exactly why they paired you two together for this project. Obviously, they hadn't expected you to almost fail the presentation, but, oh well, things happen.

Should you thank them if you ever find out? Yes. But will they ever tell you? No way, at all, ever. There's no reason for you two to ever know.

The most surprising occurrence today is most likely lunch, when you wipe off your lipgloss to take a bite of your lunch, and Kai has one request for you.

"Can I taste your lipgloss real quickly?"

The tips of his ears are red, and it's so endearing that the question doesn't even faze you. You smirk lightly, applying a fresh coat just to kiss him on the lips, and when he swipes his tongue over his lower lip after you pull away, you can't help but giggle at the surprised look on his face.

"Soobin-hyung, Soobin-hyung, I figured out why my sandwich tasted weird the other day!!"

Soobin looks up from his own lunch to catch the tail-end of Kai's sentence. He chews for a second, then speaks. "Hm?"

"My sandwich, remember???? The one I had you try and you said it tasted normal???"

Soobin shrugs, and Kai sighs, picking up your tube of lipgloss. "It tasted fruity to me. Like berries. And this lipgloss is called berry sorbet, Soobin! Because Yn's my soulmate, and she was wearing this lipgloss!!"

You facepalm at his excitement and Soobin's amused expression. Kai's in such shock, you can only expect to be hearing about this all day.

And sure enough, when Kai's walking by himself ahead of you, on your way to your last class of the day, you can hear him mumble to himself, "Berry sorbet... I can't believe I didn't figure it out sooner..."

taglist: @isitthemoon @sunnibearr @beomsitez @agustdiv1ne @mixtape-racha @hyewka @dido-of-the-endless @fairyofshampgyu @huckleberrykai @yaekounzn @prodsh00ky @yo-yo-yeonjun @sofiw0rld @strawberry-kirby @certifiedmoa @txtistheloml @shytubatu @sunnibearr @soobhns @beargyuu311 @napofamoon @zeecarus @gyuthmics @ohmahgods @notevenheretbh1 @crispymicrowave @junoswrlld @ningka @5xiang @hyungpo

[samaraannhan20]

Harry Styles Imagine: College AU! The Eras Tour

Warnings: college!reader, fem!reader, mentions of anxiety, age gap

September 2023

“Hey luv?” I hear Harry call out for me from the bedroom. 

“What’s up?” I say as I walk in holding my laptop so I can continue the homework I had been working on. 

“Do you still have a lot of homework to do?” he asks, and I look up from what I was doing and look at him, placing the laptop on the dresser and walking over to him, standing next to him as he sits at the edge of the bed.  

“Um yes and no. Why?”

“I have a surprise for you, and I don’t think I can keep it a secret anymore,” he says, and I step in between his legs and rest my arms over his shoulders. 

“What is it?” I say, and then lean forward and give him a kiss. “You know how I feel about surprises,” I say when I pull back and he laughs.

“Yes, to quote you ‘as long as you know every detail ahead of time you love surprises.’ They just can’t be blindfolded in the car with no idea what is happening,” he says laughing. 

“Absolutely correct. I mean, I have really strong deduction skills, so usually even if I’m blindfolded in the car I can still figure it out, but then I feel bad and act as though I didn’t. As long as I know exactly what is happening at least a day prior to it happening it can be a surprise.”

“Right. Well this surprise is two months in advance, so hopefully that is plenty of time,” he says with a small laugh and I smile.

“Okay so gimme. Or tell me. Whichever applies in this situation,” I say, and he gently grabs my waist and pushes me back so he can stand up. He gives me a quick kiss and then turns us.

“You sit on the bed, and turn the tv on. I need to grab my phone so I can airplay this to the television,” he says, and I do what he said. I sit on the bed with my legs crossed under me,  right at the end of the bed so I’m closer to the TV and grab the remote, turning it on. He walks back into the room right as I get it pulled up to the airplay screen, and connects his phone. All I can see is a black screen, so I look at him with a look of confusion. 

“Are you ready?” he asks, and I smile. 

“Babe, I’ve been ready. What is going on?” 

“Okay so you know how at the Grammy’s I got to talk to Taylor for a little?” he asks, and I nod my head, remembering the conversation we had afterwards. “Okay well we talked a little about you, and I left that out when I first told you the story because with your school schedule I didn’t know if we could make anything work.”

“Make what work?” I ask him, grabbing his hand. 

“Just wait. Anyway, I talked to her about you that night, told her all about you, told her how we met, how much I love you, all sorts of things like that,” he says, and my jaw drops. 

“You told Taylor Swift about me? The Taylor Swift? Your ex-girlfriend Taylor Swift?” I say, a look of shock completely taking over my face.

“Yes. What other Taylor Swift is there? And why wouldn't I tell her? We may not be engaged yet but I do fully intend on marrying you,” he says, and then places a quick kiss on my lips before pulling back and continuing. “I also told her about how when she announced her tour  you got all excited and waited in the ticketmaster queue and didn’t get any tickets and how sad you were, she had an idea. So I needed the airplay to show you the video I got from her, for you, the other day,” he says, and then takes my chin in his hand, and gently turns it towards the TV. 

“Hey Y/N!” the video starts as the screen lights up and Taylor appears on the screen. “I’ve heard so much about you from that amazing man of yours! You chose a good man,” she says, and I turn to Harry really quick, just for him to point me back to the screen, causing me to turn back. “He texted me last week and told me he had worked out a day for you guys to come to a show. So you better start looking for an outfit, because on November 11th you will be coming to the Eras Tour in Buenos Aires!” she exlcaims in the video, and I look at Harry, only to be pointed towards the screen again. “Not only will you be here but I told Harry I could get you guys into the friends and family tent, and I have some more surprises for you when you get here. I am so excited to meet you!” she says, and then the video ends, and  I just sit there staring at the screen in silence, unmoving.

“Luv?” Harry questions from next to me after I’ve been sitting there for probably a minute. 

“Hm?” I hum, still not moving my eyes or turning my body from the blank screen in front of me. 

“Are you… um… still with me?” 

“I’m physically still here. My mind is blown though,” I say, finally turning my head to look at him. “I mean, you got your ex-girlfriend to not only give us tickets to her sold out show, but put us in her friends and family tent. I didn’t realize the two of you were so close.”

“Y/N, are you jealous?” he asks with a teasing lilt in his voice. 

“Yes and no. I’m half still in shock, and half jealous because she’s Taylor Swift, a famous popstar, and your ex, and I’m just… me,” I say, looking down at my hands. 

“You don’t actually believe that do you?” he asks, taking my hands in one of his, and lifting my chin up with the other. “She may be my ex, and a popstar, but you are everything to me. You light up my sad days, you care about hearing about my days, how recording is going, how my family is. You are the person I want to come home to,” he says and then presses a quick kiss to my lips. “ Now, if this makes you uncomfortable and you don’t want to go I would complete-” he starts, and I cut him off, placing my hand over his mouth.

“Nope, we’re going. I’ve wanted this for so long. I just got a little jealous and insecure. I want to go and meet Taylor Swift. Can you imagine if we hit it off and become  best friends? I’d be part of her crew and…” I keep going as Harry just laughs and pulls me in for a hug, placing a kiss on my forehead. 

“There’s my girl,” he mutters as I continue jabbering on. 

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

October 2023

“I can’t believe you hired Lambert to put together era’s tour outfits for us,” I say as I stand in front of the garment bags that are hanging over our closet doors. 

“It was stressing you out, and you needed to focus on school. It was nothing. Basically it was the same as the outfits for the last show on tour, just different outfits” he says, wrapping his arms around me and placing a kiss on the top of my head. 

“So can I look yet?” I ask, toying with the zipper on the bag that has my name on it. 

“Is your homework done?” he asks with a teasing lilt. 

“Yes it’s done. I wouldn’t be standing in the bedroom if it wasn’t. These garment bags have been teasing me since I got home and came in here to change,” I respond with a little eye roll, and he squeezes my waist before letting me go. 

“Go ahead. Open that bag up,” he says, and I take the step it takes to reach the garment bag and yank the zipper down. 

“Wow. Lambert really kills it every time,” I say as I reach out to touch the fabric of the dress. 

“Yeha, ‘at’s why I keep hiring ‘im,” Harry says, and I laugh. 

“Is there shoes that go with it?” I ask, turning back to Harry and walking towards him, wrapping my arms around his waist. 

“Yes and no. He got a pair of shoes for you to wear with the outfit, but I thought you might like some shoes that were more comfy,” he says, and unwinds from me, before walking into the closet. “So I’m going to show you both options, and over the next month you can make the choice before we leave.” 

“Babe, we both know I’m going to pretend like I want to wear the uncomfortable ones, but I will wind up wearing the comfy ones,” I say as he steps back into the bedroom.

“Exactly. Hence why you have two options. Okay, here are the uncomfortable ones,” he says, and holds out a shoebox. I take it from him and open it. 

“Okay but these are really cute,” I say, putting the box on the bed and taking one of the boots out. “And they would go perfectly with the outfit. And they probably wouldn’t be that uncomfortable,” I say, and then slip it on. I slip the other one on and then stand up and walk around the room. “These aren’t so bad. They just feel like boots.”

“Well they are an option. Do you want to see the comfortable pair?”

“Have you met me?” I ask as I sit down on the edge of the bed and start to take the boots off. Right as I get the second one off Harry steps in front of me holding a box of Converse. “Ooh Converse,” I say as I take them out of his hand, and he laughs. 

“I know you better than you think I do,” he says, pressing a kiss to my forehead before moving next to me and putting the boots back in the box as I take the Converse out. 

“These also match perfectly!” I exclaim as I look at them. “Did you pick these or did Lamb pick them?” 

“I picked these. Lambert sent me pictures before he finalized them, and I saw the shoes, so I went online and ordered you these because I knew they’d get here around the same time.”

“Babes I’m gonna be honest, these will definitely be the shoes I wind up wearing at the concert. However I’ll wear the boots on a date night or something,” I tell him, placing the box next to me and reaching out for him. “Can we go to bed now?” I ask, shoving both shoeboxes to the side and laying back. 

“Yeah,” he says with a laugh. “But before that did you want to see the outfit he put together for me?” he asks, and I sit back up. 

“Yes! I got so distracted that I forgot!” I exclaim, and he walks over to the closet, pulling the zipper on his garment bag down. “Midnights!” I exclaim, jumping up and walking over to him and his garment bag. “This is great! I would have put you in something 1989 style because… well… You know. But this is even better! It is so close to your style!” 

“Well Lambert has been dressing me for years now, he would know my style,” he says, and I laugh. “He also said that he considered something 1989 style, but ultimately decided on this. And I’m wearing my pair of Satellite stompers from the Grammy’s.”

“It was a good choice. You’re gonna look great,” I say, and then grab his hand. “I would love to go to sleep now,” I say, and he laughs, allowing me to tug him to the bed with me. 

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️ November 10th, 2023

“This is so exciting!” I exclaim as we deboard our plane in Buenos Aires. “It’s so pretty here!”

“It is,” Harry replies, wrapping his arm around me as soon as we are both back on solid ground. “So, I have a question,” he says as we climb into the car that was waiting for us. 

“Okay, hit me with it,” I say as I settle in next to him. 

“Would you like to go to dinner with Taylor and Travis?” he asks, and I choke on the drink of water I had been taking. 

“WhAt?” I ask once I can breathe again. 

“Taylor invited us to dinner. Would you like to go?” he repeats, and I just gape at him. 

“What?” I ask again, still in shock. 

“I know you heard what I said and that you’re just in shock. So I’m just going to let you sit there in this,” he says with a smile, and leans over and places a kiss on my forehead. I sit there in silence, still shocked by the question for another few minutes. 

“What time?” are the first two words I mutter after probably five minutes. 

“Around 7:30,” he says, and I look at the time. 

“Yeah I would like to go,” I say, looking at him. 

“Are you sure? I know there’s a lot of things running through your mind right now. You can say no. I’ll understand, and so will they,” he says, and I smile and scoot closer to him on the bench seat. 

“You know me so well. But yeah. I’m sure. It’s going to be amazing,” I tell him, and then press my lips to his. 

A few hours later I’m standing in front of the mirror in our hotel room. 

“I feel like this looks awful,” I say, running my hands over the dress I had put on for this dinner. 

“You look amazing. And honestly, I have a feeling that Taylor will be wearing something similar,” Harry says, holding my satellite stompers from the last show up in the air. 

“No, I feel like I should wear nice shoes,” I say, grabbing a pair of heels from the floor. 

“Okay. If you think you’ll be comfortable,” he says, and I nod. 

“I’ll be okay. It’s dinner. Mostly sitting anyway,” I say, and then sit on the edge of the bed to put them on. I slip them on, and then hold my foot out. “Will you buckle these?” I ask Harry, and he laughs, before kneeling on the floor and grabbing my foot. When he finishes buckling one shoe he drops my foot and taps my other leg, and I lift that foot towards him and he buckles that one as well. 

“Wow,” I say when I stand up a moment later. “I forgot that in these shoes I’m almost as tall as you.” He laughs and tugs me to him, pulling me in for a kiss. 

“Are you ready to go?” he asks when he releases me, and I laugh nervously. 

“Yep. Let’s go,” I say, the nerves coming through my voice. 

“How are you feeling?” he asks as we step into the elevator. 

“What do you mean?” “I mean, you’re nervous and I want to make sure you’re okay,” he says, wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me into him. 

“I’m going to word vomit all my feelings on you, is that okay?” I say, looking up and into his eyes. 

“Luv, o’ course it’s okay,” he says, pressing a quick kiss to my forehead. “You’ve been doing it since I met you. It’s one of the things I love about you.”

“Okay that’s sweet and you’re amazing. Here is all of my thoughts and feelings,” I say, and then pause and take a deep breath. “Okay, so, I know that since I am with you it has become more common for me to meet celebrities and I should not be this nervous. I’ve just looked up to her for as long as I can remember,” I pause for another breath as we step out of the elevator and start walking through the lobby of the hotel. 

“I’ve listened to her music since I was 7. Her music is so important to me, and knowing I’m about to meet the person whose music I turn on anytime I need to feel comfort. And the work she does empowering women, and using her fame to help people understand who they’re voting for. Knowing that she also suffers from the fear of disappointing or upsetting people. She’s just so important to me and the idea of meeting her is so amazing and one of the few things I have wanted for so long, and yet I am so terrified. What if I word vomit at dinner?”

“Oh love,” he says, and stops walking,  pulling me fully into him, wrapping his arms completely around me. “She is going to love you. You don’t need to worry about being anything other than yourself. You’re amazing as is. I am so excited for you to meet her, because I believe that you two could be good friends.” He presses another quick kiss to my forehead, and then takes my hand, leading the two of us out of the hotel to the waiting car. “Plus,” he says as he shuts the door behind him when we’re both in the car. “Who cares if you word vomit? Literally no one. It’s so adorable.”

“I’m 100 percent sure you are the only person in the world who thinks my word vomit is adorable,” I tell him, leaning into him on the seat. He laughs and takes my hands in his, gently rubbing them as we drive towards the restaurant. 

“Hey, one thing I want to do for you before we go in, to help calm your nerves,” he says, and I close my eyes, knowing where he is going with this. “One thing you can taste.”

“The breath mint I popped in my mouth when we got in the car.”

“Two things you can smell.”

“Clean car and your cologne. You smell amazing by the way,” I say, keeping my eyes  closed but turning towards him with a smile. He laughs and presses a kiss to my forehead before continuing. 

“Three things you can hear.”

“You breathing, the other cars on the road, the quiet music that is playing.”

“Good job. Four things you can feel.”

“The mint melting in my mouth. Your hands rubbing mine. The press of your leg on mine. Um, my eyelashes fluttering on my cheeks.”

“Okay, good job. Last one honey, open your eyes,” he says, and I open them, blinking fast to clear them up. “Five things you can see,” he says, and I lean into him. 

“Your eyes. The inside of the car. The anchor on your arm. A car passing by. The necklace I gave you with a charm from my charm bracelet,” I say, and he pulls me in for a kiss as soon as I finish talking. 

“You did amazing. Do you feel a bit better?” he asks, and I nod.

“Thank you. I love you,” I say, and he leans back in for another kiss. 

“If it helps, I’m a little nervous too because I’m meeting my ex's new boyfriend, and having dinner with the two of them,” he says, and I just laugh and lay my head down on his chest. 

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

“Y/N, Harry said you were still in college. What are you studying?” Taylor asks about twenty minutes into our dinner. 

“Oh, um music education and theatre,” I say, smiling at her.

“That’s so awesome! Are you wanting to teach music or theatre more?” she asks, and I laugh.

“Well it depends on what grade levels. Um, I would love to teach high school or middle school theater or speech, but if I were to teach music I would prefer to teach the younger grades, like kindergarten through fifth grade,” I respond, and Harry reaches out and places his hand over mine on the table. 

“Whatever she winds up doing she will be amazing at though,” he says, and I laugh and shake my head. 

“He’s just saying that,” I say, and Taylor waves her hand. 

“No, I'm so sure you will do amazing,” she says, and I just shyly laugh in response. “Harry, are you working on anything new right now?” she asks, and I gently squeeze Harry’s hand and mouth a silent thank you to her.

“I have a few things in the works. Just enjoying the break right now though. I’m loving being able to be there for this one whenever she needs me,” he says, placing a gentle kiss in my hair. 

“I have to say, I am so glad to see you so happy,” she says to him, and I flush. Travis takes the momentary silence to stand up and head towards the restroom.

“It’s nice to see you happy too,” Harry says, and I watch as Taylor’s smile slips a bit. “I mean hiding out for six years because of a guy isn’t really you,” he says, and I kick my leg into his.

“He doesn’t mean any offense,” I say, giving her a small smile. 

“Oh, no it’s okay. I know he doesn’t. And he’s not really wrong. It wasn’t me, but I thought he was the one and I was hurting, so it seemed right at the time. But now…” she says, trailing off, looking in the direction Travis had gone. “Now I can see that it was all wrong,” she says, looking back at the two of us. 

“I’ve had that feeling before,” Harry says, squeezing my hand. I lean over and press a kiss on his cheek, trying to hide the blush on my cheeks. 

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

November 11th, 2023

“Hazza?” I call out towards the bathroom in our hotel room, and I hear him walk towards me before he pops his head around the corner. 

“Yes?” 

“I’m ready to give you your bracelets, come here,” I say, reaching out for him. He playfully groans and walks over to me. 

“How many of these are you putting on me?” he asks as I start to slip bracelets on his arms. 

“Umm, enough,” I mutter as I slip another one on. He groans again, and then starts playing with the hem of my dress with his free hand. 

“We look great,” he says, and I laugh. 

“Yeah we do. When do we need to leave again?” I ask him, putting the last bracelet on his arm and letting it go. 

“As soon as you are ready. The security will be waiting for us whenever we get there,” he says, and I turn to him. 

“I’m ready. I just need to grab my bag,” I say, and go past him to leave the bathroom. “Oh and I wanted to take a picture.” I grab my bag and my phone, and then pull Harry over to one of the mirrors. I position him in front of it to take a picture of his outfit, before handing him my phone and having him take a picture of me and my outfit. We take a picture together, and then I take his hand and lead him to the door. “Is the car ready for us?” I ask as we head into the hallway. He nods his head and together we walk to the elevator. 

“Are you nervous?” he asks as he holds my hand. “I can feel your hands shaking.”

“Yes and no. I'm buzzing with energy because I’m so excited, but I’m also nervous because I know there is some sort of surprise tonight but I don’t know what it is,” I tell him, and he nods. “Plus, she told us last night that Travis and her dad will be in the tent with us, and that made me even more nervous than I already was about the surprise tonight,” I tell him, and he laughs and shakes his head. 

“Nothing to be nervous about. Dinner last night was amazing. You two really hit it off. She even gave you her number. There is absolutely nothing to be nervous about. .” He pulls me into him as we exit the elevator, keeping our heads down, because the paparazzi had learned we were in town the night before, when they caught the four of us leaving dinner last night. 

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

“Hey Travis!” I exclaim as we get into the friends and family tent

“Hey guys!” he responds. “Your outfits are great!”

“Oh thanks! Harry’s stylist took my ideas and really made them into great outfits,” I tell him, and he chuckles. 

“Stylists are the best,” he says, making Harry and I also laugh. “Without them I’d probably walk into games dressed like… well, my brother,” he says with a laugh. 

“Hey, I’ve seen social media posts here and there, he has his own style,” I respond with a laugh. 

“His style is very dad-chic,” Scott pipes up, and all four of us crack up. “Hi, I’m Scott,” he says when we stop laughing, holding his hand out to me.

I take it and shake it saying, “Hi, I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you.”

“I heard you are a big fan,” he says, and I look down at my feet, feeling my face flush. 

“Yeah. Um, since I was like 7. This is so much better than I ever could have imagined. Not that I ever would have in my wildest dreams imagined this.” 

“I hear you. It was a shock for our entire family when she first started becoming famous. Everything felt crazy and out of a dream. Still does sometimes,” he says and Harry nods.

“Same here. It’s especially surreal when you fall in love with someone who isn’t famous and you get to experience everything through their eyes for the first time again,” Harry says, looking down at me and wrapping his arm around my waist. 

“I’ve never heard anyone explain it like that,” Travis says, and Harry laughs.

“I’m a songwriter. Coming up with new phrases is part of the job,” he says with a laugh, and everyone laughs right along with him. 

“Ooh I met Taylor last night, but do you think I’ll get to meet Sabrina Carpenter tonight? We’re the same age. Well, she’s a year older, but still the same age.”

“We all get to go backstage after the show,” Scott says, and I jump up and down for a few seconds, before realizing who I am and where I am and what I am doing. 

“Oh, sorry,” I mutter with a shy smile on my face, and the guys all laugh. 

“Sweetie, you’re just so adorable,” Scott says, and I smile and look out at the stage. I go and stand right at the edge as Sabrina Carpenter starts her set, fully turning all of my attention to the stage. Harry comes and stands right behind me, gently resting his hands on my waist as I start to sing along with the music.

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

“Babe this has been the best thing ever,” I whisper to Harry, standing on my tiptoes with my arms wrapped around his neck as we wait on the side with Travis and Scott during the last song. I feel him chuckle, before he takes my chin in his hand and guides my lips to his. I smile into the kiss, and pull away a lot sooner than either of us would have preferred, but we’re both aware that we have an audience. I turn back around in his arms, allowing him to wrap his around my waist again, and turn to look at the path Taylor will be walking down any moment. I look over at Travis who is waiting there with his hands behind his back and smile, tears welling up in my eyes. I watch as Taylor comes down the walkway, her pace turning into a sprint when she sees Travis, running right into his arms. 

“Aw that’s so sweet,” I whisper as they kiss, and then after they pull apart we follow them into the tented area where no one can see us anymore, security trailing after us. 

“So what did you think?” Taylor asks a few minutes later, after she’s drank almost an entire bottle of water and has managed to catch her breath. 

“Taylor, it was so amazing. Thank you so much for inviting us,” I tell her, and she pulls me in for a hug. 

“I’m so glad you enjoyed it. It’s such a rush being up there and performing every night. Something I’m sure Harry has told you about,” she says, glancing over at Harry. 

“Oh yeah. I’ve heard a lot about it. But seeing you do it was just so insane.” She smiles and then glances around the room, with an arm still wrapped around my shoulder. 

“Oh! I heard you wanted to meet Sabrina! She’s right over here, come with me,” she says, and begins tugging me towards a different area. She stops abruptly and turns back to Harry and Travis. “We’ll be right back,” she says, and they both laugh, and I do too. I allow her to tug me over to Sabrina, trying to control the shaking in my hands. “Sabrina!” she says when we get over there, and she turns to us.

“Hi Taylor! The show was amazing!” 

“Thanks! So was your opening! Your closer gets better every night,” Taylor says with a laugh, and Sabrina laughs too. “Anyway, this is Y/N! She’s here with Harry, she’s his girlfriend.”

“Hi! It’s nice to meet you!” Sabrina says, with a little wave.

“It’s nice to meet you too!” I say, waving back. “I’m a big fan. When Emails I Can’t Send came out I felt like some of the songs were taken right from my brain,” I say, and she nods with a smile on her face.

“Thank you. I’m glad you like it!” she says, and then looks over my shoulder towards where Harry and Travis are. “Wait. By Harry you meant Harry Styles?” she asks Taylor, a bit of shock in her voice. 

“Yeah. We reconnected at the Grammy’s a couple of years ago, and then again this year, and he was telling me about Y/N, and how she’s a huge fan, and about to graduate college with a music and theater education degree.  She was unable to get tickets because of ticketmaster, and I told him if there was a day where they could make it out for a show to just let me know and I would put them in the friends and family tent. This is the show they could make it to,” she explains, and Sabrina opens her mouth in shock, turning back to me.

“Okay, you have to tell me all about what it’s like to date Harry Styles. And how you guys met. And how college has been. I’ve always wondered what it was actually like and if it was like the movies and shows portray it. Actually, if you don’t have to leave right away, what if tomorrow you and I went out and got coffee?” she says, and I just kind of freeze. 

“Really?” I ask, my voice quieter than it had been.

“Yeah! You seem super cool and like you could be a good friend!” she says, and pulls me in for a hug. 

〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️〰️

“That was the craziest weekend of my life,” I say to Harry as we step onto the plane a couple of days later. 

“Yeah?” he says, motioning for me to hand him my carry on, and then taking it from me and placing it on one of the extra seats on the plane.

“Yeah! Sabrina Carpenter invited me out for coffee, I met Taylor Swift and she joined us, and I got both of their numbers and we’re planning out the next time we can get together. I handed out so many friendship bracelets to people who were fans of you and of Taylor. I met so many of your fans. It was so insane.”

“I love you so much,” he says, sitting down next to me and wrapping his arms around me. “I’m glad we were able to pull this off. And that now we can take the week off and go to see my family,” he says, and I smile. 

“And my family is being flown out to meet us there. Sometimes, life feels like a dream,” I say, looking out the window. 

“A good one, right?” Harry says, and I turn back to him with a huge smile on my face.

“The best dream ever,” I tell him, and then lean forward and press my lips to his.

[harrywavycurly]

I’m so happy you’re back! Could you do a text with Harry while he’s in Italy and he misses you?😊

Hiii babes!! Of course, I hope you enjoy this and idk why referring to him as having a “sad boy summer” look just makes me laugh😂💖

-find all thing Texting Boyfriend Harry Styles here✨

[1dcommunityficrecs]

University AUs!

It's the very first crowdsourced fic rec! We have 23 amazing fics listed here, about the trials and tribulations, the adventures and anarchy, the good decisions and bad decisions and downright terrible decisions that come with post-secondary education. We might have graduated high school, but we still dumb as SHIT.

Please enjoy, share, leave a kudos or a comment -- and get your reccing fingers ready for the next theme!

From Eight Until Late, I Think About You by supernope (35227, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is juggling an English degree at the University of Brighton, a budding YouTube channel, and an intense crush on a fellow YouTuber.

Reccer says: It's so cute watching their feelings and their friendship grow, from flirting in the YouTube comments to texting to finally meeting up in person (oh my god they were (hotel) roommates)

you can hear it in the silence by imogenlee (234857, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

When Harry Styles was accepted into a post-grad degree, he knew he could no longer afford his flat, leaving him with three options: 1) Move back into student halls. 2) Become homeless. 3) Move in with his best (and only) friend, Niall, and three of Niall's other mates. He went with the third option. But it was a close race. Or, two boys couldn't misunderstand each other more, but they want to.

Reccer says: The aaaaangst. The way they can't stop wanting each other despite the misunderstandings.

if it looks like, feels like, tastes like love by tempolarriefics (16600, Teen, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) - fic post

harry and louis hate each other but pretend to date to be able to live in university ‘family housing’, zayn and liam are their nosy next door neighbors, and niall is the friend who made it all happen

Reccer says: this fic is such a cute read and the author included a lot of fun details that also have you cracking up throughout!

High heels on, 'm feeling alive by thebreadvan (14596, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) - fic post

Harry damages a car when drunkenly stumbling home after a fun night out with his friends. Feeling horribly guilty, he tries to find the owner and make it up to him.

Reccer says: Harry wearing heels <3

Unbelievers by Isthatyoularry (136814, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry and Louis have always hated each other. Or not…

Reccer says: Sport AU, enemies to lovers, College AU

Speaking of marvels by Navigator, quitter (100585, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is at university in California. On vacation with his parents in New Jersey, he meets Louis. Their story is only supposed to last through summer

Reccer says: This fic is in my opinion unfairly forgotten these days even though it is a Fandom Classic, just wonderful

Don’t have to go to the pool by Kingsoftheimpossible (40857, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Louis is the captain of the swim team, Harry is in love with him a bit, and there's this ritual before Big Meets. Everything goes fine.

Reccer says: A simple an effective plot, a joy to read

Search and rescue me by Wildhalos (17423, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Louis never really paid attention to Harry until they get stuck in the locker room together.

Reccer says: The two characters who find themselves stuck in locker rooms, with all the sexual tension that goes with it. Perfect, right?

Your best line ever by Green_feelings (55116, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

University AU, in which Harry has a terrible job and lies about his name to drunk people, Louis is one of the drunk and has to move out of his flat, Liam shaves his hair because he fights with Zayn, Zayn protects Liam from creepy stalkers and Niall always has a solution, because he knows just about every person relevant!

Reccer says: Already, if Green_feelings writes something, we can already be sure that it will be good. This is even more true with a Uni AU

If walls could talk by Wickedarcher_08 (10028, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry is in love with his straight best friend. He thinks he doesn't have a chance, until Louis presents him with a challenge he can't refuse.

Reccer says: A short story with a simple, effective plot

My worst Nightmare by BooBear411 (191000, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan /Zayn Malik, Harry Styles/OFC)

they’re two students who struggle with what they feel. Harry is bisexual and has a girlfriend in the first part of the fic. They live in the same dorm and basically grow in love slowly, but steadily

Reccer says: Well written, the characters develop very coherently with the plot

Fading by tothemoonmydear (202000, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) Warnings: Eating disorder

Harry is a science student, Louis studies fashion and ask Harry to model for him. They get closer and develop a solid crush for each other. Harry gets it that Louis is hiding something and he can feel Louis is not completely open about himself. He will love him unconditionally.

Reccer says: Louis’ eating disorder is depicted in a very thoughtful way

The school of extraordinary lovers by Stylinsoncity (191000, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) Warnings: Minor violence, domestic violence, past character death

Harry is a third-year witch and violinist at magical academy, with dreams of taking on the world, and hopefully breaking the centuries-old curse on his family while he's at it. he does not dream of facing off against his childhood rival and duet partner, but louis is back in town after six years abroad, so that's exactly what happens

Reccer says: Original plot, writing styles

Blue Moon by aquietlarrie (152907, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) - fic post Warnings: Slight mention of death and grief

1950s au - gentle & beautiful coming of age.

Reccer says: So beautifully written, character development, feels like you grow with the characters

Reeling Through The Fall by Zarah5 (40068, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

AU. They hate each other. Except for when they don’t.

Reccer says: Zarah5 is always perfect

Anonymous Said by alivingfire (21158, Teen, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry has a crush on the sweet boy who he sends anons on Tumblr. He also has a crush on the cute boy in the bookstore. Fortunately, they're both the same boy and they both like him too.

Reccer says: Watching Louis and Harry fall in love with each other TWICE in the same fic? my crops are watered my skin is clear my cows are fed 18/10 no notes

The First Year by parmahamlarrie (46972, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) - fic post

Harry and Louis are roommates, sunshine and punk AU.

Reccer says: The way they get together through it all, and the fluff that comes after *chef's kiss*

knock knock, I love you by beautlouis (86066, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry and Louis get kicked out of a statistics exam for passing a knock knock joke note, and subsequently fall in love. Harry's a virgin, there's a cat, a hot cocoa date, a lot of sex, even more knock knock jokes, and everything is lovely and happy.

Reccer says: It's wonderfully cheesy and fun! The perfect fluff! Just adorable, fluffy fic and a real serotonin boost

painted on jeans by QuickedWeen (6822, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Girl Direction sorority au, friends to lovers, perfect mix of fun and hot!

Reccer says:

like fires in the night by coldflasher (138520, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) Warnings: Drug and alcohol use

Louis' got a secret stash of weed under the floorboards, his grades are going to shit and his mates keep getting pissed. There are secret passageways in the wardrobes and he can't stop thinking about the mysterious Harry.

Reccer says: a brilliant blend of absolute hilarity, angst and a whole lot of Very Bad Decisions.

Red Brick Heart by hazmesentir (98194, Explicit, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson)

Harry had turned up at the halls of residence expecting fun, new friends, and maybe a life experience or two. What he doesn't expect is a surprise roommate who's loud and dramatic and obsessed with tea and is maybe, actually, all he's ever wanted.

Reccer says: It has been a long time, but I remember loving this story quite a lot. Well written.

Soft Hands, Fast Feet, Can't Lose by dolce_piccante (112853, Mature, Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson) Warnings: Homophobia, sharing of nude photos without consent, bullying

American Uni AU. Louis hates football players and Harry. Harry doesn't know why. Through a bet Harry and Louis get closer, but the bet might be what breaks them apart too

Reccer says: I liked Harry and Louis dynamic

Shake Me Down by AGreatPerhaps12 (208589, Not Rated, Louis Tomlinson/Harry Styles, Liam Payne/Zayn Malik, Niall Horan/Josh Devine) Warnings: Religious trauma, conversation therapy, homophobia/internalised homophobia, OCD and self harm

Harry's new to college, fresh out of Catholic school and conversion therapy camp, and Louis runs the campus LGBTQIA organization.

Reccer says: The dynamic between the characters, Harry's character in general and also the random famous people in the story

[nouies]

hello and welcome to the july fic rec featuring my favourite works i read during the past weeks. as always, please check tags before reading. if you liked the fics please reblog their posts, leave kudos and write a nice comment. happy reading!  rec tag | more rec lists

— harry/louis —  

໑ If Life Is a Photograph by @allwaswell16 (T, 2k, strangers to lovers, canon divergence, singer louis, photographer harry, meet-cute, mexico) Harry gets plucked out of the crowd to take Louis’ crew pic on stage in Guadalajara.

໑ It Was Electric Touch by @allwaswell16 (E, 2.2k, acquaintances, canon divergence, singer louis, assistant harry, age difference, afhf, brazil) Harry, assistant to The Snuts' manager, has been indulging in fantasies about the headliner and founder of the Away From Home Festival, Louis Tomlinson. He gets the chance to indulge in the real thing at the after party.

໑ Tastes Like Violets by @allwaswell16 (T, 2.2k, strangers to lovers, famous/famous au, popstar harry, rockstar louis, social media, flirting) Pop star Harry Styles has a bit of a crush on his makeup artist's brother.

Or Louis has a death metal band, Harry doesn't mind public challenges via Twitter, and Lottie thinks they're both hopelessly chaotic.

໑ A ROad and A ROmance to self discovery by @rockstarlwt28 (G, 3k, friends, motivational speaker louis, student harry, lgbt+ themes, read tags and author’s note) Louis Tomlinson, a motivational speaker for the LGBTQ plus community finds himself confronted with a student who is determined to derail his presentation. Reaching boiling point and landing in hot water, Louis seeks out a place of serenity. A welcomed presence of additional tranquillity and renowned first class student Harry Styles, accompanies him.

໑ Babydoll by @louixamor (E, 4.7k, somewhat established relationship, boss/employee relationship, guard harry, italian mafia, morally grey characters, read tags and author’s note) Married to one of the most powerful men in the Mafia, Louis feels nothing but loneliness and dissatisfaction.

Lucky for him, his security guard is there to fill the void.

Literally.

໑ Couldn't Forget You If I Tried by heartbreakwthr / heart_breakwthr (E, 7k, strangers to lovers, college/university au, blind date, first dates, (or is it?), drunkenness) “What if he’s ugly?” Zayn leans in the doorway to the living room, raising an eyebrow and fixing Louis with a perplexed gaze.

“Then you’ll call me and get me out of it,” Louis attempts a shrug as best as he can with the couch cushions laid out around him. Louis smirks, “I’m going to text him back.”

Louis sits up, his eyebrows pull together, and he crafts a perfectly worded text back to the mysterious man he’s been texting with vaguely throughout the week. He writes: "7 is perfect. See you then. x"

“I’m not bailing you out of this one. If he’s ugly and boring and terrible you’re just going to have to deal with it,” Zayn shakes his head and crosses his arms, his signal that the conversation is well and truly done.

Louis doesn’t mind. He’s got a date.

Louis goes on a blind date. Kind of.

໑ If Control is My Religion… by LetTheMusicMoveYou / @letthemusicmoveyou28 (E, 14k, friends to lovers, friends with benefits, mpreg au, football player louis, athletic trainer harry, tarot reading) “So just to recap, you’ve been vomiting every single morning, and then you seem to be fine for the rest of the day?”

Louis nods. “Except for yesterday when Liam was eating a tuna sandwich after practice and it smelled vile. Who the hell even likes tuna sandwiches?”

Niall sighs in the way that a disappointed parent might. “Louis, please don’t take this in the wrong way, because I’m not judging you at all. But is there any possibility that you’re pregnant?”

Louis scoffs. Technically, it is possible. Louis’ known he was a male carrier since his routine physical when he was sixteen. But it isn’t actually possible, not really. He and Harry always use a condom.

Except for that one day a few weeks ago when Louis had forgotten to buy more and they couldn’t wait. And the time the week before that when the condom had broke, but they both figured it was probably fine.

Shit.

(Or the one where Louis is a professional football player, who’s in a very mutually beneficial no-strings-attached relationship with the team’s medical trainer Harry. Everything in Louis’ life is exactly how he wants it. Until he finds himself unexpectedly pregnant).

໑ Smooth like Chocolate by @silverstuff50 (E, 16.2k, strangers to lovers, a/b/o au, au pair louis, seduction, sneaking around) Part of the Omegaverse Fic Fest 2024 Prompt: Omega Louis babysits Alpha Harry’s little siblings. Harry comes home from uni break to see this pretty omega baking cookies in his family home.

໑ Beautiful, Dirty, Rich by @starryhazelou (E, 23.5k, strangers to lovers, age difference, rich harry, law student louis, read tags and author’s note) Later that night, Louis arrived home and screamed into his pillow when he flopped onto his mattress. This prompted Niall to appear in the doorway with a concerned look on his face. A beer was being nursed carefully in his hand, blue eyes glassy from the booze.

“Um… Are you okay?” It came out quietly like he was scared of spooking Louis.

Louis dramatically flipped over to stare at his roommate, “I met the love of my life at work, but he’s a club member so it’s forbidden.” He whined loudly, jutting his bottom lip out in faux distress.

“Shit Lou, you had me worried. Thought someone died or something,” The boy groaned, strolling over to plop himself onto the mattress, “So, tell me about this guy you wanna fuck.”

“Ni he’s the sexiest person I’ve ever met. I want to be his trophy wife he shows off, and have all his babies, and be at his beck and call twenty-four seven,” All he received in return was an unimpressed stare, his friend rolling his eyes at the antics.   ₊✩‧₊˚౨ৎ˚₊✩‧₊   Cart girl Louis x Sugar daddy Harry

໑ Bitter Ends Turn Sweet by mandylynn4 / mirandasch93519 (E, 27k, strangers to lovers, a/b/o au, best friend’s brother, police officer louis, singer harry, summer) Louis is an omega who's just completed his criminal justice degree and hoping to get into the alpha-dominated field of police work. He's spent four years hiding his secondary gender in fear that he'll not be taken seriously, or worse, not be able to continue with his chosen career path. After his summer internship is complete, he has plans to move to a more progressive city, where his secondary gender won't be an issue. He goes home to finally relax and spend the last summer with his mother and sisters before he moves and finds that his younger sister has a new best friend - a gorgeous alpha named Harry. With the singer-songwriter alpha in the house hanging around all summer long, Louis has to work even harder to keep his secondary gender hidden, which means drastic measures have to be taken. It certainly doesn't help that Harry is friendly, flirtatious, and extremely tactile… Written for the 1D Omegaverse Fic Fest 2024.

[jisungsdaydreamer]

Love Playlist #2: UGH! (Bang Chan)

«GENERAL M.LIST» · «NAVIGATION» · «TALK TO ME» 

"Shut the fuck up."

Pairing: Bang Chan x fem!reader Genre: college au, angst, fluff, enemies to lovers, forced proximity Warnings: swearing, mc has autism, misogynistic behavior (not Bang Chan), implications of ableism, bullying, short panic attack description Word Count: 11k

P.S. ♡ If you like my work, please consider giving me feedback in the form of reblogs, comments, and asks! ♡

It’s a truth universally acknowledged that you hate Christopher Bang’s guts. Everything about him, you hate. The utter laziness that he masks as nonchalance? The “happy-go-lucky” attitude that borders on bullheaded recklessness? The way every single time you text him about something important, he never replies? You hate it all. He’s irresponsible, aimless, completely unreliable, and you hate him.

Chris believes that the whole world revolves around him, and unfortunately, he would be correct. With dimples that rival Harry Styles’s and saccharinity biologically embedded in him, his good looks and charismatic personality blind everyone to the truth. Everyone except for you, of course.

Even if all of the supreme powers in the universe held you over an eternal chasm and forced you to find compromise, you still wouldn’t be able to stop hating him. And you hate heights— almost as much as him— so that’s saying something. Your hatred for him will never, ever waver. You hate Chris Bang, period. And you hate him even more now, as he stands next to you and accepts an honor that should solely be yours.

“Congratulations, Chris and Y/N!” 

You keep clapping and plaster on a fake smile to save face, trying to ignore the rage bubbling inside of you. In your peripheral vision, you sense Christopher laughing and shooting finger guns towards people in the audience, like some kind of corrupt politician. In a way, he is one, because you should have won this election. But you didn’t.

“In all of our history, never has there been an exact voting tie between two candidates.” The sickeningly cheerful announcer bounds closer to where you are standing on the stage, gesturing towards you both. “Everyone, please give another round of applause for our new Student Co-Presidents!”

Hearing it officially made you feel nauseated. For the three years you’ve been a college student, you have worked tirelessly, day and night, so this moment could come to fruition. All of those days filled with nonsense— schmoozing to all of the seniors in the Undergraduate Student Council, attending the endless number of tedious mixers to make connections, standing in the rain trying to raise funds for the organization— were going to be worth it, because in the end, you had one goal: to be student body president. 

But your dreams were dashed to the ground when he strolled in like a supermodel. While you were toiling since you were a freshman, Chris showed up at the final student council meeting at the end of last year, expressing his intentions to run for president in the following academic semester after the summer. Chris’s charm threw off the projectile of the election, compared to how although you carry yourself very well professionally, you still are very socially uncapable. Making engaging small talk about the weather or joking about frat parties on campus are unthinkable tasks for you, while that kind of conversation is exactly Chris’s forte. 

You know that you’re lucky that you at least get part of the title, because while on paper you are more qualified than Chris, the game was never in your favor. And seeing it all happen by the cursed will of the one person you’ve despised more than anyone else, since you were a kid, makes it hurt more than anything.

“Great job, partner.” 

You’re snapped out of your disturbed musings by the aforementioned person, who beams and stretches out his hand towards you. You’re wary of the gesture, but accept it anyway, making sure to squeeze his hand extra hard. 

“Same to you, Christopher,” you retort, adding an unmistakable bite to your words.

The smile doesn’t fade off of his face as he coolly shakes his aching hand off from your death grip. “I go by Chris, you know that.”

You nearly snort, but refrain from it, because people are watching. You do not need any negative publicity right now, especially next to your co-counsel who seems to do no wrong. But that won’t stop you from being discreetly petty. “Okay, Christopher.”

You hate Chris, and he knows it. But his elated expression doesn’t budge as he merely moves away from you to spark conversation with the announcer, who looks at Chris with literal hearts in her eyes. One more thing you hate: no matter how much you try to rile him up like he does to you, he never gives you a reaction. That satisfaction solely belongs to him. 

Rolling your eyes, you shove past him as gracefully as you can, eliciting a surprised grunt out of him. As Chris rubs his side behind you, you turn to the students coming closer to congratulate you, the smile on your face very much genuine now.

“He left me on read! AGAIN. Can you believe the audacity?” 

The smoky, herbaceous scent of freshly brewed coffee and sugary fragrance of baking breakfast pastries does nothing to soothe your anger. Your unadulterated complaints ricochet off of the walls of Morningstar Coffee House, your go-to place when you need to feign study in order to hang out with your best friend, a devoted employee-in-training at the place. 

Soobin groans, dumping out the latest batch of long macchiato into the sink. “I keep messing it up.”

“Are you even listening, Soobin?” You lean against the counter that he’s behind, wiping up the small drops of milk that escaped the carton in his hasty panic to master the art of being a barista. 

“Yes, yes, I am, sorry. Please continue.” Soobin sets aside his blender and folds his hands on the granite, looking at you earnestly. 

You pick at the chipped dark purple polish on your nails. “I can work with him. I can. Because I’m a professional. But he makes it so hard when I’m trying to communicate with him.”

Soobin shrugs. “Maybe he’s just not using his phone right now.”

With a frustrated sigh, you shake your head. If only everyone could be as sweet and guileless as Soobin. He always sees the best in people, and while you’re not a pessimist, it’s hard for you to find the good in Chris’s character. 

“It’s not just the text thing, even though I really do need him to tell me if he’s finished the nominations for the ethics board. It’s like, he doesn’t give a crap about anything, especially when it comes from me.” 

Soobin nods slowly, wrinkling his nose in thought. “I know he’s difficult. But just keep rising above. Getting upset hurts you, not him.”

As always, Soobin remains the voice of reason behind your storms, your eternal complement. When you need to cry your emotions out, he welcomes you with open arms. When he’s too shy to ask for the dessert menu at restaurants, you will signal for the waiter. When you make your displeasure apparent, he induces a degree of rationality into your vexed mind. That said, fundamentally, both of you are introverts. At the end of the day, you love nothing more than to curl up on the couch and watch knitting tutorials on Youtube with Soobin. Opposites or not, you fit each other like a glove. 

“I love you, cucumber,” you say, affectionately poking fun at your best friend’s towering height. 

Soobin’s cheeks turn light pink, and he swats your hands away. “You’re weird.”

You tip your head back and laugh, while Soobin grins and resumes his duties in trying to figure out how to work the cash register. You can feel the worries already lifting in your chest, because who cares about Chris, anyway? Certainly not you. 

But as if you had spoken of the devil, you hear the jingle of the shopkeeper’s doorbell, followed by that familiar boisterous guffaw. The sound makes you whirl around, the tension soaring back into your shoulders. And there he is, sauntering into the café with his trusty entourage trailing. 

Your narrowed eyes meet Chris’s, and he pauses in the middle of whatever obnoxious joke he must have been sharing. For a brief moment, a telepathic duel sparks between you both, a challenge to see which one of you will be the first to crack. You win, when he breaks eye contact to go and find a seat with his friends in the lounge area. But once more, it doesn’t feel that way, because while he’s resumed his own activities, you’re still thinking about him. So much for rising above. Damn it. 

“Soobin, you need to scan your employee ID first or else sales won’t be attributed to you. We already went over this.”

The voice of Seungmin, the son of Morningstar’s owners and your fellow university student, halts your deliberations and thankfully pulls your thoughts away from Chris. Seungmin is inside from his break and stands there besides Soobin, scolding him for making another mistake in his practice transaction before the evening rush. 

“Right! Sorry about that.” Soobin shakes his head and exhales, grabbing a towel to wipe his sweaty hands.

“You’ll be fine. Just keep at it.” Seungmin softens, patting Soobin on the back before making his way over to where Chris is sitting. Because of course, Chris is friends with every single person in existence.

Another person enters the building, prompting the telltale ring to go off. Soobin’s perpetual flush morphs into a crimson, and you immediately turn to see which newcomer has got your best friend so hot and bothered. You’re met by the sight of a very pretty girl who you recognize, but whose name escapes you. However, you know the boy she has walked into the coffee house with— her best friend, Han Jisung, who is unsurprisingly another member of Chris’s glorified posse. 

“You have got to be kidding me.” You raise your eyebrow at Soobin, who is still watching the girl with a lovelorn look in his eyes.

“What?”

“You can’t like her. She and Jisung have a thing.”

“They’re just friends,” Soobin says, frowning, but you can see the contradicting doubt written across his face. “Maybe I’ll talk to Seungmin and see what’s up.”

You take his hand and resign, because other times, both of you have to learn your lessons on your own. “You’ll make someone’s heart beat as fast as they do your own. Whether it’s her or not.”

Soobin swallows, fully directing his attention back to you. “The same to you as well. ”

You let out a playful snort, thinking of your one short-lived romance from freshman year. You haven’t dated since, deciding to set relationships aside so you can focus better on your studies. You cannot take the chance of losing precious time, time that can only be allotted to your favorite person, work, and nothing else. Besides, you’ve never been very good at flirting— let alone finding friends— anyway. 

“But I think Chris raises your pulse rate enough, so maybe you’ve got your plate full for now.”

“Don’t start,” you warn, the annoyance picking up again. Soobin sends you a cheeky smile, before he attends to his peckish customers. 

You take the opportunity to make your way back to your table in the front of the cafe, your favorite little spot that overlooks the lush campus lawn, and then past the historic buildings of your university, the faint city skyline. The trees have begun happily shedding their leaves like multicolored tears that dot the outdoor expanse, embracing Autumn like a long-lost lover. Today is gorgeous, a day that should feel like a blessing, and yet, you feel blue.

The reason for your melancholy approaches your carefully curated bubble and pops it, sitting down at the table, uninvited. 

“Hey, I didn’t see you at the election after-party the other day.”

Chris’s voice is calm, so you merely clench your jaw and keep from saying anything too unintelligible. “Hey, you read my text and didn’t reply today.”

He doesn’t let the sheepishness cross his features, but has the decency for it to manifest in a light red at the tips of his ears. “I was going to, sorry. I’ve been busy.”

You just can’t help the venom that laces your next words. “You always are.”

Chris shakes his head, leaning back in his chair. “I don’t get why you always have a problem with me.”

You allow yourself a sharp intake of breath before divulging your current frustrations with him. “I really, really need you to answer me when I ask you something. We represent all of the students in our college. We can’t afford to mess this up.”

Chris rolls his eyes at your words, which makes you even more irritated. “I know.”

“Great. Then we have nothing else to discuss.” You slip your laptop back into your carrier and zip up your backpack, grabbing your phone and pushing your chair in. You don’t spare Chris a glance as you walk towards the door. 

“Why can’t we just be friends like before?”

You tense at Chris calling out, but don’t look back to face him. “You should know the answer to that.”

“I really don’t.”

With a scoff, you leave him hanging, pushing open the door and finding somewhere you can actually study without distraction.

It’s only the second day of fourth grade and you already feel so out of place. You moved here  over a month and a half ago, in the middle of summer, so you had a lot of time to get used to the town and explore your new home. You enjoyed biking around the neighborhood cul-de-sac all day and discovered a clearing in the woods behind your house, immediately claiming it as your personal hideout. After your parents hosted some of your neighbors’ families for dinner, you even established friendly relations with Soobin, the impossibly shy son of the couple next door. 

But your expeditions in school haven’t been as successful. As soon as you stepped into the classroom, it seemed like everyone already had their own friend groups, less than willing to take on a newbie like you. Because all of the seemingly “cool” kids have claimed all of the seats in the back, you sit up front, the desk next to you empty. And although Soobin also attends the same school, he’s in a different homeroom than you, so your in-school interactions are limited to hallway waves and nothing else. To top it all off, your teacher is already talking about long division. What in the world is that?

“Would you like a pudding?”

You turn around to pinpoint the hushed voice that has interrupted the independent classwork time that your teacher allotted. The owner sits right behind you, this kid with dimples and mischievous eyes. You can’t recall his name from when your teacher took attendance in the morning, but you remember him singing a little rhyme to his friends during lunch yesterday. It was cheesy.

The boy holds out a small cup of what looks like Jell-O snack pudding towards you. You accept it, slightly confused at the random gesture. “Thanks.”

“You’re welcome.” He folds his hands on his desk, math practice discarded to the side. “You looked hungry.”

He’s watching you intently, waiting for you to eat the pudding. With a sigh, you open and try it, because you are kind of hungry. As soon as your lips gingerly close around the tiny spoon, you grin, because it’s chocolate— your favorite.

“I’m Y/N.”

“Chris,” he replies, obviously delighted by your reaction to the pudding. “Are you new?”

You smile, relieved to finally see a friendly face in your class. “Yeah, I am. Thanks for the pudding.”

“I don’t go anywhere without my trusty pudding cups.”

You don’t say anything, just quietly observing him while savoring the pudding. Chris is a little weird, and maybe too friendly. You're usually careful about this kind of socialization, but he doesn’t seem like a bad person. Chris takes your silence as an opportunity to keep chattering away.

“I notice you sit alone at lunch. You should eat with my friends and me today!” Chris exclaims, earning him a look from your teacher, but he doesn’t notice.

You pretend to contemplate his offer, although you’re secretly elated at the invitation. “Maybe if there’s more pudding.”

“Deal.”

“It looks like the faculty advising problem is sorted. Anything else?” 

The Dean of the college closes his laptop and pushes the pair of glasses perched on his nose for the hundredth time in the past hour. The lenses are huge, magnifying his eyes and making them look bugged-out, adding a comical element to his otherwise stony face.

“I was thinking—” You start, taking out your notepad, but the Dean cuts you off, looking at Chris.

“Chris, did you have anything you wanted to say?” 

Your cheeks as you avert your gaze shamefully, and all of the other students in the conference room awkwardly stare down at the table. The Dean doesn’t seem to notice your discomfort, however, just intently staring at Chris. For the entire board meeting, you actively participated and made your voice heard, while taking into account others’ concerns and viewpoints. 

Meanwhile, Chris had done nothing but squint at the papers in front of him and pretend he knew what was happening. But you’ve always been underestimated just because you’re a woman, and the fact that you’re the only female student body president in the entire history of your university doesn’t help. Of course the Dean would value Chris’s thoughts more. Anyone would. 

“Actually, Y/N was saying something. We should let her finish,” Chris replies firmly, shocking you. You thought Chris would just take the opportunity to shine for himself, not hand it to you.

The Dean looks taken aback as well, but he nods slowly. “Very well then.” 

Everyone’s attention snaps to you, but you quickly recover and recollect yourself, turning on the professionalism you reserved for moments like this. “Yes. Thank you.”

You open your computer and quickly login, plugging it into the projector so everyone can view your screen. You had already pulled up your presentation and graphics, ready to present your idea. 

“What is all of this, Miss Y/L/N?”

You take a deep breath. “A prevailing issue that has come to the board’s attention is the food insecurity on campus. To solve this issue, I propose the University Food Pantry, to relieve hunger through the acquisition and distribution of food to those students who most need it. We need to lead our campus community in the fight against hunger.”

The rest of your audience looks intrigued, but the Dean doesn’t seem convinced. “And how does this concern me? I oversee educational affairs at the college, not what’s cooking for dinner.”

“Our university is, above everything else, a community. The difficulty of higher education is further compounded when hunger is a constant presence.” You try your best to keep your suave composure, ignoring the smug condescension in the Dean’s voice. “As a result, the Food Pantry will envision a campus in which every student, regardless of their socioeconomic status, has sufficient access to nutritious food. No one should have to make financial and dietary decisions in pursuit of a good education.”

“It all sounds expensive. Where would you even get the money from?”

You know that the Dean expects you to be thrown off by his question, but you’re ready. You switch through the slides of your presentation, showcasing the several charts and graphs you stayed up all night drawing. “The Dean’s Assistance Fund, through which the Pantry can provide flex allowances to undergrad recipients of Financial Aid.”

The Dean leans back in his chair, brooding silently while you wait for his answer with bated breath. But Chris speaks up instead.

“This is really good, Y/N,” Chris says, astonishing you even further. “The fund could finance other initiatives in collaboration with the pantry as well, like the university Meal Share app that my friend Jisung coded. He’s in the computer science department.”

“Thanks,” you say warily, still in disbelief that you have both his support and enthusiasm. The other students murmur in agreement, but it doesn’t feel real, getting along with Chris. 

Immediately, the Dean sits up, directing his gaze to match Chris’s. “A wonderful idea, Chris. We must talk further about this. Perhaps—”

It’s Chris’s turn to cut the Dean off. “It wasn’t my idea, it was Y/N’s, if you were listening to her at all, sir.”

The Dean looks embarrassed after being put into his place by the very student he was chatting up to, but you don’t give him time to say anything else, taking the chance to continue speaking. 

“Of course, we can’t be fully financed by the Dean’s fund, so I think the university board should put forth a collective effort to apply for the Park Grant, an international system that funds programs that address student reform.”

“You’ve put so much thought into this, Y/N,” Mina, one of the board members, says with a smile. 

You light up, forgetting the Dean’s less-than-enthused demeanor. “Thank you so much!”

The Dean sighs, staring up at the ceiling, but shrugs, inclining his head in reluctant approval. “The Park Grant deadline is in two days. You’ll have to write up the proposal and present it to the panel.”

You nod vigorously, already mentally adding it to your calendar. “Thank you sir, I know. I won’t disappoint you.”

The Dean points his pretentiously expensive fountain pen at Chris, directing your gaze to his. “But you’ll be presenting with Chris. You’ll oversee this endeavor together.”

Your soaring heart crashes, and you sit up in indignation, because of course there’s a catch. After undermining all of your efforts, the Dean would never trust you to do something like this on your own. And out of everyone, it has to be with Chris.

“Sir, I truly believe I can finish this on my own.” You can barely contain the anger quaking in your throat, but you give it one last attempt.

Chris glances at you and dips his head in accord. “I agree, sir. Y/N is perfectly capable. This is her project, after all.”

“Let’s not go near what our capabilities are. I am very well aware of what your abilities are.” The Dean’s words jab you in the chest one by one, making you wonder if he could go any lower. “You both are co-presidents. Do it together or don’t do it all.”

“Sir—”

“Please give me a chance—”

Both you and Chris are cut off by the Dean’s cold sneer. “That will be all.”

With the wave of his gnarled hands, the meeting is over, and the rest of the students exit as fast as they can to escape the tension, while you just sit there, staring at your black computer screen blankly. A moment later, you collect yourself, grab your belongings, cramming them into your arms, and run out of the room, trying not to cry all of your frustrations out, right then and there.

“Y/N, stop!” Chris calls out from behind you, and you groan inwardly. And of course he has to be there. You can’t even fall apart in peace.

“What do you want, Chris?” You sigh exasperatedly, turning to face him, even though all you really want to do is give him the finger and run back to your room.

The tension is palpable, and you see Chris’s concern. You don’t want it, though. You don’t want his concern, his sympathy, or his friendship. You just want to never see him again, but unfortunately, the universe will not let that happen. You should have accepted that when it put you through elementary, middle, and high school, and even college with him. 

“I’m sorry. I- I tried,” he says, running his fingers through his hair, combing through it before the soft, blond locks flop back into place on his forehead. He looks more beautiful than ever, the sorrow in his deep brown eyes and painted into the pout on his perfect lips. But God, you hate him.

You swallow, taking a step forward. Chris’s eyes widen in surprise, but he stays still as you proceed in an eerily calm voice. “Outside of work, don’t talk to me. Don’t look at me. Don’t even think about me. I hate you, Chris, and I wish you never existed.”

For the first time, Chris is speechless, but you walk away, feeling anything but triumphant. You don’t want to see the hurt splayed across his face. And you don’t want Chris to see your own pain, the ugly root that digs deep into your heart and surges through your fingertips, the pain that has been there since the moment he took something from you. You hate Chris, and that will never, ever change.

“Come on, Soobin, tell me,” you whine, lightly kicking your legs at Soobin’s, where they hang over the edge of the treehouse you both built with your dads a few summers ago. The June weather is hot and sticky, and on days like this, you both like to climb up here and try to catch the faintest breeze that may come your way, ice creams in your hands and stories to trade on your lips.

Soobin coughs awkwardly. “Absolutely not, Y/N.” 

Tomorrow is the last day of middle school, and you’re determined to guess Soobin’s crush. You smirk at him, elbowing him in the side. Today, you suck on a blueberry popsicle, deliberating while trying not to let the dessert drip down your arms. 

“It’s the girl in your history class, isn’t it?”

“Nope.” Soobin side eyes you curiously, biting down on his own fudge ice cream cone. “Well, maybe I’ll tell you if you tell me yours.”

You blush, your mind immediately going to Chris, the boy you’ve liked since forever. Although you’re best friends with Soobin, Chris is also one of your good friends at school. And not to mention, the cutest boy in your entire school. 

Besides Soobin, Chris is also the only other person you’ve told about your autism. You were always shy and awkward growing up, and Chris pulled you out of that shell. 

It’s also why you get so nervous before tests. Since the time you nearly dropped your computer before a science quiz in fifth grade, Chris always brings you pudding before class assessments. You were scared to tell him at first, because you have been bullied in the past about it, but he had been nothing but kind and understanding. He’s never forgotten to bring you a pudding cup, and he specifically brings chocolate-flavored ones only, because you once told him you liked them. 

“You can’t tell anyone,” you swallow the last chunk of your popsicle, crunching down on the sugary ice. 

“I promise.” Soobin sits forward eagerly, his melting ice cream cone forgotten.

“It’s Chris,” you say dreamily, a lovesick smile playing upon your lips. 

Soobin burst out laughing, elbowing you in the side teasingly. “I knew it!” 

You and Soobin start arguing about who was more obvious about their respective crushes, but the thought of Chris stays lingering in your mind and clouding your thoughts. His devilishly handsome looks but angelic personality. The way he brings you those damn chocolate puddings, unaware of how you got sick of the flavor a long time ago but keep eating them anyway, just to see the beaming smile on his face. 

“Tomorrow,” you exclaim randomly, right after Soobin finishes telling you about all of the teachers he will miss over the summer, the perfect student he is.

“What’s tomorrow?”

“I’m going to tell Chris that I like him. Tomorrow,” you declare, trying to keep your voice strong and purposeful.

Soobin just stares at you with his jaw hanging open, because while you aren’t as soft-spoken as him, neither of you are particularly forward. Especially not in regard to your romantic lives. You both are the duo that watches your lost loves from afar, not confronting them up close. You’re surprised at your uncharacteristic behavior too, because you pledged to never give a teenage boy the satisfaction of knowing the power they have over you, especially not someone popular like Chris. But then again, Chris is different. You know it.

“Are you actually serious right now?” Soobin asks, still in shock. “Like, are you joking?”

“I’m serious, Soobin. I really like him.” You toy with your stained popsicle stick. “If he doesn’t feel the same, then I can just move on.”

“Wow.”

“I know.”

He reaches over and gently pats you on the back, as if to comfort your nerves. “He’d be really dumb to not like you.”

You groan and flop onto your back, looking up at the dusty ceiling of the treehouse. Both of you just stay quiet for a moment, as you observe the soft cobwebs in the corners and the sunlight pouring through the cracks in the wooden rafters. You’re really going to do this.

“I’m still hungry.”

Soobin holds out his half-finished cone, little droplets of ice cream dripping onto the wood. “You can have the rest of this.”

“Thanks, Soob.” You accept his ice cream and both of you continue to reminisce about the school year and plan out everything you probably will never do during the summer, because both of you are master procrastinators.

But one thing you can’t put off is your revelation to Chris, and it’s going to happen. Which is why you find yourself trying to ignore the impending feeling of dread as you walk through the school hallways. Classes are over for both the day and the entire academic year itself, and there’s no better time to confess to your crush on the last day of school. That way, if something goes wrong, you can take the summer to recuperate and wallow in your humiliation. 

You weave through the students excited to trade their homework assignments for sunny days at the beach, with only one thought in your mind. Chris, Chris, Chris. You saw him in math class in the morning, and he looked so cute in his new Hawaiian-print shorts while he signed your yearbook for you. Now, you try to find him in the crowd, before he leaves and you’ll be unable to see him for another three months.

As you search, you’re momentarily snapped out of your Chris-induced daze when you bump into Jessi Ho in the congested hall. Knowing your luck, of course you would crash into the loser who constantly picks on Soobin for being shy. 

“Watch it, dumbass.” Jessi crosses her arms and flips her hair over her shoulder. Jay, her wannabe sidekick, gets up in your face, threateningly flashing the tattoos he got without his parents knowing. Although they look like a classic pair of bullies straight out of Mean Girls, you’re more irritated than intimidated right now. 

“I don’t have time for this.” You try to move past the terrible twosome, but Jay grasps your forearm roughly and pulls you back. You wrench your arm free and look at him in both disgust and confusion. “What the hell?”

“I’ll get to the point.” Jessi smirks, bringing her finger up to her head and pointing to her temple. “We know you’re impaired. Up here.”

Your blood freezes over like a river of ice, when Jessie emphasizes that specific word. Even though you’re not impaired, because autism isn’t an intellectual disability, you know what she means. She says it like an insult, like you’re the most useless of garbage, not worth a human being’s basic dignity. Jay bursts out laughing when he sees the horror on your face, slapping his distressed denim thigh like it’s the funniest joke he’s heard in the fifteen miserable years of his life. You just stumble back, shock and panic rising like a tidal wave in your chest. 

“W-what?”

Jessi cackles, clinging onto Jay like he’s her own walking cane. “How cute. She looks so lost.”

You shake your head, the tears building and your throat seizing in alarm. “How…?”

“A little birdie told me.” Jessi steps closer to you, and while every other time you are able to stand up to her, you can barely look her in the eye right now. “It all makes so much sense. Why do you barely talk to anyone but your pathetic bestie? You’re too scared. Why can you never sit still in class? You're just stupid.”

“That- that’s not how it works.” 

You’re grasping at straws, at a loss for words. Any other time, you’d have a snappy comeback ready. You know you struggle with social interactions, but you never thought of yourself as someone disruptive, or weird. You’re one of the highest achievers in your entire school, because sometimes, books make more sense than people. But now? You do feel stupid, exactly like Jessi said. And not because you’re autistic, but because you weren’t careful enough. You’ve been underestimated your entire life because you’re a girl, but now, you know you’ll also be an autistic girl to everyone else. Not who you are. And that’s why you tried your best to keep it on the down low, not because you felt embarrassed, but because this was a part of yourself that was entitled to you. Not anyone else.

“Sure, okay.” Jessi looks bored already, her eyes unfocused roaming the hallway, looking for her next target. “Whatever, stupid.”

Jessi slinks off without a second glance, and Jay follows suit, but not before doing a disgustingly inaccurate impression of autists, speaking gibberish slowly and exaggeratedly. You actually speak faster than other people, because you always say whatever is on your mind. But you don’t give a crap about them right now. Bullies like them will always have the worst to talk about others, and you would rather die than have them be the cause of your tears, ever. What’s really bothering you is who told them about your autism, and how that mystery person found out.

Swallowing roughly, you run over to the bathrooms, forgetting anything else. The only thing on your mind is not losing it in front of everyone. You will not give any of these people the satisfaction. Trying to keep your breathing even, you’re about to enter the bathrooms and relieve your emotions when you hear someone say your name. It doesn’t sound deliberate however, like you weren’t supposed to hear it.

You turn slowly, searching through the swaths of people walking, when your gaze lands on a small group of people gathered at the end of the hallway, a few lockers away from where you’re standing. And his back facing you, but you immediately recognize the person speaking. After the previous year of sitting behind him in Geometry class, you would recognize his curly locks perpetually dyed a soft blond and preppy polo shirt anywhere. Your ears perk up in interest, and while you feel horrible, you know one of Chris’s dimpled smiles would immediately brighten your stormy day, as they always did.

“Tell us the truth Chris!” You hear someone screech like an eager toddler, and you stop in your tracks like a deer in a traffic jam. It can’t be. 

“Fine, Y/N is autistic...”

Everyone around Chris bursts into uproarious laughter, and while you can’t see his expression, Chris begins saying something else that’s drowned out by all of the noise. It was Chris. He told everyone about your autism. Chris, the sweetheart who brings you pudding. Chris, the pretty boy who you have a hopeless crush on. Chris, your friend.

You stumble back and are pushed back into the after-school hallway rush, losing sight of Chris. But you already saw everything you needed to. It would have hurt less if it was anyone but Chris. But it wasn’t. You liked him. You trusted him. And he took that trust and stomped on it, shattering it forever. He took something from you. 

Your heart hardens as you blink away your tears. You mindlessly make your way outside, just in time to catch your bus home. Looking out of the window, with your time and your spirit petrified, you resolve to never, ever make the same mistake again. You will never again put your faith in someone who does not deserve it. 

“You look hungry.” 

You momentarily glance away from your laptop screen to shoot Chris a withering look that could scare a bear. Things are back to normal since your emotional confrontation after the Dean’s meeting. Your rude remarks and his annoyingly cooperative advances are both back for good.

“Shut the fuck up.”

The blistering ice in your voice doesn’t stop Chris from unzipping his backpack and pulling out one of his damn puddings. With a scoff, you turn back to your spreadsheet, taking care to shoot disgusting looks at Chris periodically. Chris just takes his time savoring his pudding, innocently watching your reactions like you’re a goddamn television set.

The hours pass by quickly; you get a good amount of work done, while Chris tries to be helpful by asking useless questions and doing nothing else. Typical. After finishing up a final follow-up email to the Dean’s much more tolerable secretary, you stretch out your arms with a yawn. The library will be closing in a few minutes.

“Where are you going?” Chris’s voice is interrogative as you stand up, like you owe him an answer, which makes you see red. If anything, he is the one who should be giving you an explanation, perhaps why he has to be such a two-faced monstrosity who wants to pretend everything is fine and in the past.

Screw civility.

“Oh, I’m sorry, your royal dopiness. I didn’t know I needed your permission to go home.” Your words are filled with a sickening sarcasm, and fortunately, it’s enough to shut Chris up.

You grab your belongings and stalk out of the personal meeting room that you reserved, barely noticing that everyone else sitting at the previously crowded study spaces has already left. Once in the security of the library bathrooms, you exhale all of the tension you’ve held inside of you and splash cool water onto your heated face. 

You stare into the mirror, seeing the same girl you’ve been trying to leave behind all of this time. You feel like that lost little girl trying to clutch the thought of someone who should be forgotten. You hate that you still have hope in you, that you’ve had it all of these years, that things can be fixed. You’ve tried, you really have. You’ve tried to leave the past behind you, to look forward and do exactly what needs to be done for your success. Here’s the truth: you act like a bitch towards Chris because he sucks and you hate him. Here’s another truth: you act like a bitch towards Chris because… you’re hurt. 

Especially because of your autism, you’ve had a more difficult run at making meaningful relationships. Your friendship with Chris meant that there was hope for you, and you truly believed that. But then he betrayed you, making you doubt yourself and your abilities. And following the incident, it felt like the world was working against you, and it still does. Maybe you could have healed with time, but the universe had other plans, taking care to put you through high school and college with Chris. And with your rotten luck, he’ll probably end up going to the same law school as you.

But you don’t have the time to worry about that right now. Your future depends on the present, and you’ll do your best to remember that. Your productivity mantra will keep you going, and nothing can stop you, from Christopher Bang to misogynistic old deans to… a locked bathroom door?

“What the hell?” You tug on the handle, but the door won’t budge. 

Fuck. 

You were so occupied with Chris that you forgot that after hours, all of the doors automatically lock to preserve campus security. Screw modern technology. You’re about to pull out your phone to try and call someone, but when your fingers meet an empty pocket, you realize you left it in your apartment. With an exasperated groan, you bang against the door as hard as you can and shout for help, even though you know it’s impossible for anyone to hear you and open the door from outside, the only way to free you. After a few minutes, you give up and slide down onto the floor, knowing you’ll have to spend the rest of this godforsaken night in this stuffy bathroom. Even if you somehow eventually gain the strength to bust this stupid door down, there was no getting past the padlocked main library doors. But seriously, which genius had the idea to lock the freaking bathroom doors? 

You close your eyes and place your hand over your heart, trying to calm yourself down. You’re perfectly safe. Alone in a big, empty library. Soon, the bathroom lights will shut down, probably. You wouldn’t know for sure, though. You’ve never been locked in the damn library bathroom before. Perhaps you’ll make friends with the old campus ghosts rumored to haunt this building. And maybe—

The click and turn of the door handle startles you, and you immediately jump out of the way, so your designated savior can let you out. And you’re not even surprised when your eyes meet Chris’s own confused ones. Because of course it’s Chris.

“Why are you still here?” You ask him in a slightly accusing tone, even though he literally has just helped you. You don’t even know why you feel the need to be so pointed, but you are nevertheless. 

“I was waiting for you to come back and didn’t realize the library was closed.” Chris lets out a sigh, rubbing his forehead as if it aches. You hope it does. “I have a question about the proposal.”

“Did you try calling someone? I forgot my phone.”

“Well, my phone doesn’t have any service.”

“Awesome.”

You don’t say anything further as you both exit the cramped corridor outside of the bathroom. In your hurry, you hadn’t even noticed how the librarians had turned off the lights, shrouding the building in darkness. Shivering, you subconsciously move closer to Chris, before you realize yourself and make sure to maintain a six-feet distance between your body and his.

“You can come closer if you’re scared,” Chris teases, noticing your discomfort. “We’re both stuck in this library together.”

You roll your eyes. “Oh, please. You’re the one who’s scared of the dark.”

Both of you fall silent as the remembrance sinks in. The day you confided in Chris about your autism, he had shared a secret about himself in return, albeit a less serious one. He had an irrational fear of the dark since he was a small child, and you knew any other fourth grader would have made fun of him for it. You had felt happy, then, that he could confide in you. 

The inadvertent memory feels unwelcome, uncomfortable. Chris clears his throat and looks away. “Not anymore.”

You and Chris decide to make camp in the library common room, since although the main building lights wouldn’t work, there were a few soft table lamps you could turn on for some clarity. You set your backpack down on the carpeted ground and snuggle into the large armchair by one of the bigger lamps. You glance at the decorative grandfather clock in the corner of the room, and it’s just past midnight. At that moment, you really just want to go home, put on your favorite pajamas, and fall asleep while watching your list of comfort anime films. Definitely not being locked in the damn library with Chris Bang, of all people. Since when was your life an episode of Arthur?

“So, you wanted to ask me something?” 

Chris fiddles with his hands for a minute, before looking away. “Never mind.”

You don’t even have it in you to be annoyed at this point. You’re just exhausted. You fall back against the tough cushion of the chair. It feels like you’re sitting on a clothed bag of sawdust. But it’s better than being out there, in the dark. And you hate to admit it, but you’re glad that you have someone to share the company of an empty library with, even if it’s Chris. 

“God, I’m hungry.” You touch your stomach, feeling the gnawing emptiness there.

“Would you like a—”

“No, I would not like a pudding, Chris.”

The minutes eventually tick by, and you feel yourself nodding off. You had told yourself earlier that you would stay alert, but the drowsiness drapes over you like a blanket, lulling you into reluctant sleep.

The menacing roll of thunder snaps you out of your uneasy slumber like the sound of a car crash. Immediately, you double over and tuck your head into your arms, trying to breathe. Your hands, warmed from being pressed under your thighs, go clammy with a cold sweat, and you can feel the tears well, barely keeping them at bay. When your go-to breathing technique doesn’t work, you gasp for air, jerking in your seat at every new crack of thunder invading your perception. 

Immediately, Chris crosses the space between your chairs and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a tight hold. Sometimes, thunderstorms cause you to have a sensory overload, and you can’t cope. Chris knows this about you, after you got severely spooked after one particularly bad storm in the middle of class in sixth grade. Chris continues to rock your body slowly with his, whispering calming nothings into your ear. Your breathing slows and returns to a normal pace, but Chris just keeps rubbing slow, comforting circles on your back. 

Soon, the sound of the thunder dissipates, but you’re not entirely sure if it’s actually because the storm ended or if it’s because the overwhelming scent of Chris’s fresh, minty cologne has taken over your senses. 

You look up at Chris, the boy you hate more than anything, and whisper the very last thing that you ever thought you would say to him. “Thank you.”

Chris just nods his head slowly while you untangle yourself from his hold. He gets the hint and lets you scoot away from him, but it’s not far enough. Mere inches separate you from Chris, Chris who helped you without second thought because you were having a panic attack. Forget every ounce of hostility you have shown him, he hugged you like he was your lifeline, which he nearly could have been. 

He looks at you intently, his eyes glistening with emotion. “Why do you hate me so much?”

He’s asked this question multiple times before. The first time was back on the very first day of high school, when you both had English class together, and you staunchly ignored him. He continued to ask you the same thing over and over again, until your lack of acknowledgement made him finally stop and accept your new attitude towards him. But even though you’ve heard this question before, this time feels different. There is a certain vulnerability to his words, like he’s given up and is pleading for one last chance. 

A part of you still wants to try and maintain the animosity you use as a protective barrier, so people can’t tell what you’re really feeling. But you’re just tired of it all, and the question tugs at you too. Maybe you need to reply out loud for both of you to hear, not just him. Maybe you need to affirm your hatred for the dumb boy who waited for you to come back from the bathroom and then held you during a thunderstorm. Or maybe you need to affirm the fact that you may not hate him as much as you think, but you still do. You don’t know. You hate him the most because you don’t know. So, for the first time, you answer him.

“You broke my trust, Chris.”

“When?” Chris looks genuinely perplexed, like he has no idea what you’re talking about. 

With a scoff, you glare up at the ceiling, unable to look him in the eye. “You told everyone about my autism. When I specifically said that I wanted to keep it a secret.”

He shakes his head in a vigorous panic. “I didn’t tell anyone. I promise I didn’t. I promise it wasn’t me.”

Then who was it? 

As if he hears your thoughts, Chris sighs and indulges them. “Jessi. She saw your aide and followed him to his office. She was telling everyone about it, I swear.”

And it makes sense. His explanation checks out, and this all could have been a grand misunderstanding on your part, because of course Jessi would have snooped into your business. You couldn’t save your privacy for long with someone like Jessi hovering. And the thing is, you’re not even surprised. You knew in your heart the entire time that you could have been mistaken, that it was strange that Chris would have violated you like that, but it was just easier to blame him for your pain instead of confronting it. Or so you thought.

“And when everyone found out, I tried defending you. I never, ever would want to hurt you. Please believe me.”

Chris’s eyes are shining with earnesty, and you know he’s telling the truth. But that doesn’t erase all of the years you were hurting. “Why didn’t you just tell me that?”

“It didn’t even occur to me that it was the reason you stopped talking to me. I’m sorry I didn’t try harder.”

You close your eyes and lean back. “Chris, you don’t have anything to be sorry about. This is on me.”

You feel your hatred towards Chris fade, and all there is left in you is a deflated pocket of sorrow. Your whole goal was to stay focused, but in reality, you’ve put so much time and energy into despising Chris. And that wasn’t the only way you hurt yourself. You also deprived yourself of what could have been a wonderful friendship.

“I do,” Chris insists, interrupting your thoughts. “I was stupid. I gave up so quickly. It hurt me too, not just you.”

You raise your head and tiredly gaze at him. Even in the dark, he looks beautiful. And it’s not merely his looks, but truly his character that shines through. You spent hours picking apart his personality, trying to find flaws and reasons to demonize him, not knowing that in the process, you were the monster yourself. You constantly complained about his lack of initiative and response, when in reality, you never let him actually do anything. You can’t even fathom why he’s being so understanding, or all of his attempts to work with you, even after your cold treatment of him.

“What do you mean, Chris?”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this.” Chris groans. “I used to like you. There.”

You perk up. Well, now you’re shocked. “Wait, really? I used to like you, too!”

There’s disbelief written all over Chris’s face. “You’re kidding.”

“Nope.”

Both of you burst into laughter, like you weren’t having a heart-to-heart five minutes ago about hating the other. It feels good to laugh, and for a second, you’re transported back into fourth grade, when you first met Chris. 

When you were a kid, you barely laughed, which worried the crap out of your parents. The doctors said it was common among individuals with autism, but it didn’t seem that way when you walked around, unsmiling and unfeeling. You weren’t completely socially inept, or exactly shy, but you preferred to keep to yourself. And then Chris had offered you a pudding. You felt like friendship was worth something, then. You felt seen. And maybe that scared you a little bit, being on the edge with someone who made you feel so deliciously raw. Maybe that’s why you didn’t fight back for Chris, because you would rather leave than be left. 

Chris rakes his fingers through his hair, the ghost of a smile playing upon his lips. “You know, I still like you.”

“Very funny.”

“I do.”

“You’re crazy. Stop that.”

“Maybe.” Chris throws his hands up and then lets them fall back down. “I like you and don’t want to stop.”

“After how I treated you for the past eight years?” You nearly laugh with how ridiculous he’s being. Hell, if you were in his place, you’d hate yourself.

“But you were hurt. A lot.” Chris shrugs. “You’ve become this amazing woman. You’re… incredible. Hardworking, talented, smart. Keeping in mind how you truly believed I was the cause for your pain, you excelled in spite of the fact that the universe kept pulling us together.”

You shake your head. “I… I don’t know what to say.”

“That’s okay. I’ll say it for you.” Chris looks down at his palms. “I like you, and that’s why I became co-president and faked having no service on my phone so we would be stuck in a library together.”

“Chris—”

“Please. Don’t say no. Not after eight years of me pining for you, knowing you’d never look at me again. Knowing I was falling deeper every time you cursed at me. Please, Y/N. I want to know you again, and you to know me. Please.” Chris’s expression is begging, and it pains you even more. 

You still hurt, but it’s a different kind of torture. It’s the kind of hurt that’s the result of yearning, the kind of yearning that stems from hatred, subjugated love, and uncertain acceptance. It’s the kind of hurt that tells you that you don’t deserve him. He deserves someone who isn’t a complete and utter coward. Someone who hasn’t been completely and utterly in love with him all this time, but too stubborn and too pained to admit it. Someone who isn’t completely and utterly awed by the magnificent man he is, but too bitter to say it. 

Chris reaches out his hand and places it on the side of your face, imploring you with his hesitant palm. You melt into his touch, when a mere few hours ago, you would have slapped it off of you. His skin is warm against yours, and the softness radiating from him pulls at you. You want to say yes. You want to open a blank page in the book. You want to start fresh with this beautiful boy in front of you.

“I’m sorry.” And you’re not just apologizing for pushing him away before, but now too. You don’t get to have him. 

“Just… why?”

“I can’t. I’m so sorry.” The repeated dialogue from you has a note of finality that even Chris’s insolence can’t break through. 

And just like that, all of the bridges you both repaired come crumbling down, but this time, it’s on purpose. You’ve always been quick to make decisions, never mulling over a choice for too long. You loved Chris. You hated Chris. You still love Chris. But you reject Chris. It’s easy to do, like one computer command after the other. But then Chris retracts his touch and wordlessly gets up from the armchair, curling up into his original position in the other chair. He’s facing away from you, you feel like you’ve struck an error message. The hours pass, and the softly snoring form of Chris reminds you of a blaring bad request, a pile of code that just won’t compile. Eventually, your computer shuts down too, and you share a temporary commonality with Chris when you fall asleep.

“Wake up dear.”

Your eyes fly open, and you sit up. Natural light pours in through the big windows, and you can feel your skin drinking in the sunshine. The librarian’s kind eyes are watching you with worry, but all you can think of is the night before. Perhaps it was all a dream. You were angry at Chris and then fell asleep after coming back from the bathroom. End of story. But then you feel that familiar ache in your heart, and you know you weren’t hallucinating everything that transpired between you both.

You turn to look at the librarian, who still seems immensely concerned, especially with your disoriented morning look. “I’m sorry, where is Chris?”

“He just left a few minutes ago, sweetheart. I was opening up for the day, when I saw him waiting to be let out at the front entrance. Nearly scared the life out of me.” The librarian places her hand on your shoulder. “He told me you were here.”

The librarian rushes off to her personal office to make you some tea, and you’re left alone in the common room. And no one else is here either, because today is Saturday and your university is supposed to be hosting a football game against a rival school. You look down at your body and notice a jacket wrapped around your body, one that definitely isn’t yours. You don’t have an expensive leather jacket that smells like Tom Ford cologne. It was freezing last night because the library doesn’t have heating, and Chris must have woken up in the middle of the night and draped it on you. You feel another pang in your heart as you think of Chris leaving without speaking to you. You deserve it, though.

As you sadly walk out of the library, you decide to skip the game even though as student body president, you should be there, representing the school. You reach your off-campus apartment, the one that you were so excited to finally lease a few months ago, and sprawl onto your couch, already feeling weary of the day. Nevertheless, you fish your phone out of the jumble of couch pillows and call Soobin, because he must be worried sick. You always text him goodnight before you sleep, and yesterday must have been the first time you didn’t.

“How could you?” He’s angry, a new color on him.

“I know, I know, I’m sorry. The library—” You start, but Soobin doesn’t let you finish.

“Forget the library! I’m talking about Chris. He’s stepping down from the president role because of you, Y/N!” Soobin screeches into the phone, making you shoot up in alarm.

“What?!”

“I overheard him tell everything to Jisung. Y/N, this is wrong.” Soobin sounds calmer, but nonetheless distressed. “I know you love him. You shouldn’t let this happen.”

Your face heats up in surprise. “How—”

You hear Soobin tsk, and you just know he’s shaking his head, disappointed. “I didn’t even have to hear him talk to know that. There’s a fine line between love and hate. You can never stop talking about him!”

There’s no denying it now. You shouldn’t have underestimated Soobin; no matter how silly he can be, he is your best friend in the whole world after all. And maybe all the time, the only one you were lying to was yourself. 

You grab a pillow and cradle it, just wanting to cry it all out. You always have more intense feelings than others, but right now, your heart hurts so much that you doubt you can blame being emotional on your autism. 

“Soobin, what do I do? I don’t want to hurt him, but…” You sniffle. “I didn’t even give him a chance to explain himself. For eight years, I made my whole personality hate Chris. And now, he forgives me and I accept it? I’m so stupid, God.”

“I agree you’re stupid.”

“You’re not making me feel better!”

“Sorry.” Soobin sighs. “But you need to get over yourself and your drama. Stop making this harder for both of you, and just be grateful that you haven’t lost him. Yet.”

And with that, he cuts the call in a way very unlike Soobin, making you groan out loud in frustration. Now you want to punch your pillow, because your best friend is absolutely right.

It doesn’t take long for you to find Chris in the packed stadium. Through the throngs of students eager to trade their homework for a good home game, you see him standing with one of his friends in an upper corner of the stands. When you were younger, you were obsessed with Greek mythology and thought that Chris looked like Apollo, the god of the sun, with his golden curls and sunny disposition. Today, his light seems to have dimmed, as he watches the ongoing game with his hands shoved into his pockets and a forlorn look marking his gaze. 

“Chris!” You shout to try and get his attention, but it’s to no avail. The cheering crowd is ear-splitting, and you have no other choice but to climb up to the top.

Grunting, you hoist yourself up the steep stairs and try not to look behind you. If you do, you’ll fall off the stands with dizziness, which would be slightly undesirable compared to what you have to do next. Slightly. With the final step, you haul into Chris’s row, catching your breath and a first glimpse at how high up you really are. The players on the field look like tiny ants, and you feel your stomach drop. Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. 

But it’s too late to turn back now, because Chris has already spotted you and hurries over. You tense and lose your footing, stumbling over someone as they kick their legs in anticipation. Great. 

“What are you doing here?” Chan places a toned arm around your shoulders and pulls you up, leading you to his seat. You clumsily collapse into the solid, curved plastic of the chair, and Chris follows next to you.

You then notice Chris’s friend, a heartbreakingly handsome man who you vaguely remember as Minho from your sophomore year literature class. He’s wistfully gazing at a very pretty girl who is chatting with Terry, Soobin’s old roommate, a few rows down. Minho then becomes aware of your presence and hurriedly excuses himself, rushing out of the aisle and disappearing into the crowd. You turn to Chris.

“Is he okay?”

Chris exhales, running his fingers through his hair, combing through it before the soft locks flop back into place on his forehead. “I… Minho’s just going through some stuff right now.”

“Seems like he’s not the only one.” You toy with your ring, twisting it around your finger. “I heard you’re resigning.”

“Who told you that?”

“Soobin. He was eavesdropping on you and Jisung today in Morningstar,” you respond. “Why are you leaving the role?”

Chris looks away from you and out at the field. Your university’s football team still hasn’t scored. “I’d just be in your way. This is for the best, Y/N.”

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way. Please don’t. I need you.”

“You’ll be fine.”

This is what you thought you wanted all along, a world without Chris in it. Besides Student Council, neither of you share any classes or activities this year. If he left, you wouldn’t have to cross paths with him again. You could run the council well on your own, you know that. But you don't want to. You don’t ever want to imagine a world without Chris. He’s been by your side for so long now, and now when he’s about to step away do you truly realize how much you need him.

“Maybe. But I won’t be happy.” Against your better judgment, you reach over and grasp his hand, making Chris start in surprise.

Chris shakes his head, still skeptical. “All I’ve ever done is make you unhappy, Y/N. You don’t want me to be around.”

You sigh, knowing he’s not going to come around, not without the right kind of persuasion. “I was dreading having to do this.”

“Do what?”

You reach into the small purse hanging off of your shoulder and pull what you had scoured the entire city for in the past few hours. “Would you like a pudding?”

Chris looks bemused, staring down at the small cup of chocolatey goodness in the delicate palm of your hand. 

“Or do you want a kiss?” You stare at Chris intently, trying to ignore the whammering beat of your heart. “What will it take for you to stay in your position?”

“W-what?”

“Or I could be your girlfriend. Because I really want to see where this goes.” You take a deep breath. “A bunny once told me that I just need to get out of the past. I’ve left it behind, and I’m looking forward, Chris.”

“Fine.” Chris swallows roughly and bites back the slow smile spreading on his features. “Can I have all three?”

“You never make it easy, do you, Chris?” 

Before he can quip back at you, you grasp the collar of his t-shirt and tug him to you, your lips meeting just as the home team finally scores a touchdown and the crowd erupts in applause. You couldn’t care less though, because although the preteen you is jumping up and down like the rest of the cheering fans, the adult you is smiling into the lips of the man you definitely do not hate. Actually, you love him. 

Chris slings his arms around your waist and pulls your body closer to his, sweetly laughing into your ear when you both come up for air. “Am I a good kisser, or what?”

“Shut up.” 

And you’re kissing him again. Warmth blossoms in your chest, sparks igniting as you lean into each other after years of loving, hating, and longing. Your arms roving over each other coax all and any remaining hesitation left in you both, and it feels so right. You treasure the soft sighs of pleasure and elation spilling from Chris’s lips, his sounds more deafening than any overzealous football fan’s rally cry. 

“So, do I not get the pudding, or…?” Dimples cut across Chris’s cheeks as he pulls away from your lips once more just to shoot you a cheeky grin.

You roll your eyes playfully and reach into your lap, tearing open the foil wrapper on top of the pudding cup before handing it to him. “You and your pudding.”

“You know you love it.”

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[wolves-and-stars]

Beginner's Guide to Wolfstar (Long Fics)

(here's a list of my top 10 favorite long fics ranging from 259k to 59k words)

Momentum by children_of_the_shadows (ao3) 259k

If you have to ready any canon compliant (mostly) marauders through the years fic, this is the one, Children_of_the_shadows is one of the best writers ever, Top 3 fic authors.

2. Text Talk by merlywhirls (ao3) 141k

Everyone knows text talk, it's basically wolfstar bible, Non Magic AU where the boys meet by accidently texting the wrong number.

3. Time is a Fine Invention by bluepeony (ao3) 105k

Brilliant university non magic au, with the most imperfect and human characterization of both Remus and Sirius, read it if only to humanize the both of them and their relationship. Insecurity in a relationship and Coming of age and all the thoughts accompanying it are perfectly described in this. so much foreshadowing if you read it carefully enough.

It'll make you hate and simultaneously empathize with both characters.

4. Slughorn's Sanitarium for Troubled Boys by MelloPie 65k

TW: discussion of mental health, SA, institutionalization, ab*use, s*icide, self h*rm.

Non-Magic AU, set in a mental institution, where both noys have to share a room. Its one of the first long fics i ever read, so maybe i have a soft spot for this one, and every other fic on this list.

5. The Lad That Loved You. by MollyMaryMarie (ao3) 81k

I've said this once and I'll say it again, mollymarymarie is one of the best writers out there, another top 3 author for me, all of her fics are amazing, obviously including dear you holiness, we can pretend, the only living boy in new york, i might have to do a separate recs list for that.

But, if you had to read just one, i would say The lad that loved you is the perfect one, set in their 6th or 7th year? of hogwarts, they hide their new relationship by acting like they hate each other, and let me tell you, they are exactly, perfectly themselves in this fic, and by that i mean exactly how i imagine them.

There is not one single thing about this fic that i would change. Perfection.

6. Discards by picascribit (ao3) 76k words

I can't make a fic rec without picascribit. Cure for nightmares changed my life. Non-magic AU, Remus meets Sirius in the library he goes to study at, real love isn't always perfect and doesn't involve perfect people, is what i've take away from this fic.

7. ten reasons (to go to michigan) by greyeyedmonster18 (ao3) 59k

Top 3 Fics. If you had to read any wolfstar fic, it would be this one. I've read 100's spanning from 2016 - till date, and this is the best one ive ever read.

Remus is newly divorced, and he meets Sirius Black.

If you've ever lost someone one and had to re-learn how to live without someone you never thought you would have to live without, this fic will encapsulate the gist of it in words.

In one of their notes the authors says something close to 'the hardest thing about losing someone is finding out that the earth keeps spinning and you have to keep living'

8. Dating Remus Lupin by Children_of_the_Shadows (ao3) 83k

Top 3 fics. I can't explain this fic in any words, the writing style is brilliant, the characterizations are unique and wonderful and perfect. Everything about this fic is brilliant.

Set in Year 5, Sirius Black wants a boyfriend and James tells him about the only other openly gay boy in in their year, it just happens to be Remus Lupin. Much to his disdain.

9. Remus Lupin's Guide to Successful Courting by Children_of_the_Shadows (ao3) 87k

Non Magic AU, Remus Lupin finds harry in his yard having escaped from school and return him back to Dr. Sirius Black, who's new to town and coincidently doesn't have an inkling about Remus's past, his eyes clear of any judgement are what make Remus fall for him and pursue him, court if you will.

I again cannot explain this fic. Children_of_the_shadows is the most talented writer, i will make a separate fic list for their other brilliant work.

10. Sex Pistol by ArtificialAorta (ffnet) 86k

Musicians AU, Remus is punk rock, Sirius is akin to the prince of pop, how can they not fall in love?