The Way We Were
Word Count: 791
tags: f!Reader, dark!logan (past), threats, mentions of blood, past abusive behavior, implied alcoholism.
"Stop. it." His voice came out in growls.
His claws are so close to your skin you almost feel a thin line of blood running down your neck.
"One more word. Just one. And I'll show you what these can do."
You couldn't move. You couldn't speak. Too terrified and heartbroken of the man that had once mattered to you the most. The one you'd have willingly sacrificed your entire life for.
"Never look for me again. Don't call me. I don't want to see you." The rage in his eyes, the coldness, was a sharp contrast to the soft hazel orbs you had fallen in love with long ago.
*SNIKT* As fast as his claws had appeared, they were gone. You finally allowed yourself to breathe. It's short lived, because he's soon up in your face again, a disgusted sneer on his features.
"Now. Get out of my life." His breath smelled like tobacco and alcohol, all mixed together. He had been drinking himself to oblivion again. You let the tears fall. You didn't recognise the man in front of you. Your husband.
"GET OUT." He roared in your face, making you wince.
He turned around and left you behind without sparing a single glance, in the empty parking lot of that dive bar in the middle of nowhere.
That was the last time he would see you in many, many years.
Logan woke up sweating and with his heart hammering in his chest. It had been so long since the last time he had dreamed about you. About that fateful night.
He grips the couch so tightly, he's going to tear the cloth. His hands were shaking as he felt the too familiar hole inside his chest reappear. He needed a drink. He had to drink. This never happened when he was drunk.
Stumbling over his own feet, he made his way towards the fridge, opening it with more violence than necessary. With his heart in his throat, his eyes searched manically until they set on a single can of beer.
That would have to do. For now.
He tried to calm his overwhelming thoughts with a single gulp, nearly drinking more than half of the can; focusing on Althea's snores from across the hall. Whatever distracted him long enough to avoid thinking about-
You.
Your soft smile. Your encouraging words. Your endless support through all his mishaps and hardships.
How gorgeous you had looked in that white dress when you walked down the aisle towards him. How great you had made him feel, like he was the luckiest man on the planet.
How he had completely fucked things up.
No matter how hard he tried to keep his memories of you at bay, his treacherous heart kept going back to you.
He wondered how you were doing. If you got that promotion you wanted.
Did you still kept your endless collection of air fresheners that drove him insane? Were you living in a better apartment than the one you had?
Did you remarry? Were you two actually divorced? He didn't remember signing anything at all. His teeth clenched at the thought of anybody else having you.
He shook his head.
What right did he had over you? After everything he had done, all the pain and trauma he pulled you through, what made him think he had any say on who you choose to spend your life with?
He wasn't the man he wished he was for you. The one that you deserved.
Yet...
He was here. He had been given a second chance to pull his head out of his ass and do the right thing. Out of all the better suited Wolverines there were out there, Wade picked him and turned him into a different man.
He was a completely different man from the one he was back then. The one torn with rage and grief. That monster, murderer, he was long gone, locked away, he would make sure of it.
He looked towards Wade's bedroom. He knew the sneaky bastard hid some of those dimension-travelling tablets somewhere in his bedroom. Knowing him, it would be probably the dirtiest and grossest corner where he would be sure Logan would never look.
He titled his head. A dangerous idea forming in his mind.
Could he?
Would he actually dare?
What if he just took a small peek. Just to make sure you were alright. You didn't have to see him. And he could return home with the knowledge that you were alright.
It was a terrible idea. A dangerous idea. But if the Wolverine was known for anything, it was for barreling into danger first and asking questions later.
He just needed to find the right moment.
106 notes
·
View notes
Thinking about the Bruce-Dies scenario...
You know, that is going to be a definite whole mess for Damian.
The way we've imagined the timeline in the comments, Talia dumps Bruce in the Pit, amnesiac Bruce stays a while with the League, meets Damian, is told this is his kid...the whole heartwarming stuff...
And then Bruce - somehow, maybe something triggered the memories - finds out what Talia did. Finds out his sons and Alfred (dad) have been mourning him these two years, his sons have been fighting for Gotham alone, they almost died way too many times and she kept him from them...
I think it's 100% that Bruce bolts. And about 80% that he'd take Damian with him. No way he'll trust Talia with his kid, not after what she did (she might have reasons, but no reason is going to suffice for Bruce, given what happened)
Well, there's the return, everyone is overjoyed...except for Damian. The kid has had his entire life upended. His father now hates his mother, he has two brothers - three, assuming Tim is tagging along - to compete with for father's attention, he's in a completely different world with different rules...
That's true. It'd be a big change for Damian plus the culture shock. And that's not considering how young he'd be since he's around 7 years younger than Tim(?) and Tim would be about 15 years old, so that'd make Damian 8 yo (ironically the same age as Dick when he lost his parents, which makes me think he'd be, again, perfect to help him adapt to this new environment as he did at his age. He can relate to suddenly being taken away from the place and people he's known his whole life to out of nowhere be part of a completely different dynamic that's nothing like his old family.)
At first I think it'd be specially a mess because of the shock it must be for the others to see their presumed dead father suddenly walking up to them, carrying a child and telling them he's been alive for the past two years without his memories.
So, at least for two months, Damian wouldn't be able to properly get used to this new life. He'd probably even try to escape and go back to the LOA (possibly as he also tries to convince Bruce to come back with him). But, in the end, he'd be stopped everytime.
From then on it'd be a matter of how long it takes for him to warm up to the others and how much effort they put into trying to get Damian to like them.
And since Damian would've been raised by both his parents in this alternative, I think he'd be much less... Deadly? What I mean is that he'd be less likely to attempt to kill his brothers since, unlike in the original universe, he doesn't have to prove himself for Bruce to see him as his son as Bruce would've already accepted him by then. However, he would be hostile due to what you mentioned about having to share Bruce's attention with the others.
I'm honestly not sure how this would unfold, so I'm taking any suggestions.
32 notes
·
View notes
I really wish a Dalish Elf could point out to Vivienne that the only reason Clans keep minimal mages is because they want to avoid Templars pulling up and massacre-ing everyone for harboring a bunch of apostates. I wish I could know what her reaction is to that particular detail she leaves out. She would probably have a new excuse locked and loaded but I wish I could hear it.
going to use this ask to complain about the treatment dalish mages get in dragon age inquisition, because the idea that the dalish cast out their mages when there are "too many of them" is something bioware completely pulled out of their ass for dai. in previous games and dragon age media, the dalish are shown to be nothing but accepting and protective of their mages, no matter how many mages there are in a single clan. the idea that the dalish would cast out a young child (in the case of minaeve, the creature specialist in haven) or an adult mage (in the case of dalish from the bull's chargers) because there are supposedly "too many mages" in one clan is. ridiculous.
i do fully agree that the dialogue options an elven inquisitor are given during that conversation are like. extremely bad, though. bc they are. but it's such a break off from the already established lore of how the dalish treat the mages in their clan that i can't get past it long enough to genuinely pick apart vivienne's reaction to it because. that's just. not how dalish mages were treated previously. but yes, the dialogue options should of been different.
edit: this was originally just in my tags, but i figure i'd add this bit too incase this is reblogged
23 notes
·
View notes
Something I appreciate about Hortus de Escapismo is how it portrays the Laterans and non-Laterans, especially in contrast to each other. Guide Ahead already gave us the angel ethnostate vs multi-racial heretics, which made for a pretty effective if blatant commentary on Laterano. And while it might seem Hortus is kind of repeating the same formula, I think it's got something subtler going on with interesting implications.
On one side we have the abbey's inhabitants: sankta, sarkaz and all other races--hell, even a seaborn for a moment. Are there cracks here and there? Of course, that's a whole plot point. But it can't be denied there is genuine camaraderie and self-sacrifice going on between these people who are simply trying to survive together (which is what makes those cracks all the more volatile).
Contrast this with the Laterans, who are dysfunctional as hell. Lemuen, Oren, Richele, and Spuria; I can't say I fully parsed everything happening between them on a moment-to-moment basis, but it was overall apparent that none of these people trust each other. Even though they're friends and classmates and colleagues, even though they're working for the good of the same state, even though they're sankta who can literally read each other's minds. There's just this constant mess of cahoots and conspiracy and treachery and bitter friction, and it takes the threat of an Innsmouth-Jonestown crossover event to get them to finally work together.
I thought it was a nice way to show more of Laterano's flaws. It's one of their core themes that they aren't as great as they say they are, but you'd think they would, at the least, have blessed harmony thanks to their literal hivemind. But evidently that isn't true either. And again, these are agents at the highest levels of the government. If they're this dysfunctional, what does that say for Laterano as a whole?
Which leads me into thinking about what the future of Laterano might have in store. I've seen some folks point out how these events have these greatly compelling premises that don't actually resolve any of the issues they bring up. Laterano only remains Laterano. And this is true! But I think it's intentional, setting up a slow burn of a regional conflict. The Lateran state is holding together, the status quo remains unchanged, the Law is content. But for how much longer? Guiding Ahead introduced us to the divide in Laterano on a broad level, the state vs heretics. Hortus de Escapismo shows the cracks within the state, narrowing in on individuals who nominally should be on the same side but aren't. The next logical narrative step would be seeing the state finally cracking apart from whatever looming danger the Law sainted Federico to deal with.
Some sort of schism, perhaps; that seems like the sort of existential threat that would directly threaten the Law's directive of preserving the Sankta. Law's awareness of it would also imply it's an internal threat, something festering in the hearts and minds of Sankta and thus one It's able to sense (at least that's what makes sense to me. We don't actually know how the Law works, so it could very well just have random magic prophetic abilities). And especially with the constant background pressure of trying to legitimize their Summit of Nations, what better way to drive that issue to the forefront by throwing Laterano into utter political chaos?
62 notes
·
View notes
Mandatory introductory post!
Since the MOMENT the original GF show aired, I was kinning YOUR problematic fave; thats well over a decade! And boy oh boy am I SO fucking back. (I never left.)
Keep in mind; at the initial time, I was a child and didn't know what kinning was (small brain, big big plans!) which puts me over the legal drinking age now. No kiddos interact, come back once you hit legality.
I'll be honest, its been years since I've made a sideblog (or a main blog) for kinning; I don't really care either way if people wanna talk to me, but I'm not against having some fun! I'm here for a good time, and for the love of GOD no drama. Does that still happen in kin communities or has everyone finally grown up?
Anyway, I'm shoving every little thing I relate to into this one little sideblog on this shithole of a site. Thats it.
This is my ONE POST I'll make to scream into the void just to establish this new sideblog and why its here; at current time, I don't even have it up and running yet. Not even a profile pic. It doesn't look pretty, but it will eventually! Maybe! We'll see.
6 notes
·
View notes
I'm thinking again on the fact that so often comments, criticism and readings on Jack dwell a lot on how he is barely human/a person/doesn't have a personality at the point of the story and, while I somewhat understand these points, I find them so lacking. I find them... ableist? I'm always doubtful to use the word here because I'm not sure if it's applied in this kind (mental health) of context, but something like that. And I find them extremely simplistic.
However, honestly, a big part of the reason for these readings being so popular is that the manga itself words it that way. But that's one of the problems I find in the manga. When I say P.andora Hear.ts is very good but unfortunately it is very manga-like at times, besides the 2000s homojokes and the like, I'm usually thinking about things like this. I feel like often characters and situations that are (potentially) very intricate instead of getting insightful deep overviews often get screwed by the writing itself, which falls into very manga tropes a lot in a bad way (not that every manga has to fall into them, or that every manga trope has to be bad or written badly).
I don't know... For instance, I'd argue R.askolnikov's capacity for love in Cr.ime and Punishmen.t is debatable, but it's never treated as if it made him less of a person, a human being or made him not have a personality. I'd say not even Svidrigailo.v, who is as much a Bad Guy™ as a character can be, gets that treatment by the writing. I'd say that even him or Mikol.ka are written as fully fleshed human beings with their intricate internal lives and feelings. Svidrig.ailov's last scene with D.unya is fascinating for both characters and spins the whole dynamic and makes you question the entire narrative and veracity of not only those two characters, but brings to mind several other conversations among different characters and throws light (and doubt!) on the main plot between R.askolnikov and Porf.iry.
In similar situations, Jack's humanity, personhood and personality are debated, doubted and even full on accepted as vanished. No one reads Crim.e and Punishmen.t and comes to the same conclusions about Raskolni.kov, Svidrig.ailov, Sony.a or Razu.mikhin. The writing doesn't allow it. The writing doesn't allow you to forget that humanity is diverse and multifaceted, that it can be sad and cruel and loving and monstrous, even all at the same time, or that a person may struggle with feeling at all; and one is still a person.
15 notes
·
View notes
OC DUALITY
was tagged by @morvaris to take this uquiz for my ocs >:) thank you nico this was super fun!!
tagging: @numbaoneflaya @time-is-a-lake @aartyom @nuclearstorms @girlbosselrond @druidgroves @malefiicarum @swordcoasts @aldcaldos @sufferthorn @steelport @calenhads @lavinet and anyone else who’d like to join in !!
you and the hat man
oh boy you're fighting demons aren't you? it's like you're in a constant staring competition with something that's always in the peripheral. what the fuck. (at least, that's how people who don't know you would react). at this point you've probably gotten pretty familiar with the hat man. he's a reliable kind of guy. keeps to himself, sure, but you can trust him to be there. maybe a haunting isn't too bad if it's never left your side. you can only imagine what it will be like when he's not there any more.
god-hungry scientist and their abominable child
you stitched something together inside of yourself and gave it life with light from the sky and now it won't die and you can't kill it because part of you loves it and you're not quite right in the head or the person you used to be but at the end of the day it's simply a beast of sadness. you crave the mercy you didn't get from your creators and so i'm telling you please forgive yourself. please hold the monster by the hand.
moon curse of the werewolf
you have found yourself hungered or sickened or ambitious to the point of emotional carnage. you are fine, until you're not, and then you could rip someone in your way apart with your bared teeth by complete accident, and later claw at yourself in fits of pain trying to apologize. do you look at the moon that blessed you in her name, at her marred beauty and baneful eyes, and wish she could just crush that loving-hateful heart of yours before it crushes itself? every bite you take out of flesh is a response to the threads of silver bullets in you that haven't healed. the duality is that the human inside is howling too, gnashing, and without the wolf pelt, everyone can ignore it and turn away. at some point, you got tired of the moon being your only witness. now the wolf is there to make sure others know that you are hurt, and deserving of humanity, of attention to wounds. because that wolf loves you; all of you; and knows when you are hurt better than yourself.
14 notes
·
View notes