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teine-mallaichte · 2 months

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Let's talk hallucinations in whump/general fiction.

So first off full disclosure, I have schizoaffective disorder - think some bits of bipolar and some bits of schizophrenia kind of squished together, and as such hallucinations are a BIG part of my general existence.

Definition: A hallucination is a perception of a sensory experience—such as sight, sound, smell, taste, or touch—that appears real but is created by the mind and lacks an external stimulus.

Now, I see a fair few "hallucinations" type prompts in whump events, and just generally within the whump community, and I see a LOT of auditory hallucinations type prompt fills - mainly in the form of malevolent whispers - and ye that's a thing, but there are so many other hallucinations.

The thing is hallucinations can effect literally any sense, not just hearing - though I will add that auditory is usually regarded as the most common.

this is a long post so I am going to put a cut here... below the cut is exploration of the tyoes of hallucination, the causes and a bit about insight.

So, I thought it could be "fun" to explore a few in a post. Lets explore the 5 "main" senses first:

Auditory Hallucinations

Description: These are the most common type of hallucinations. They involve hearing sounds that are not present. The sounds are hear as if they are coming from somewhere external to the body. So in my case I have a few of these, but my main one is a voice who is with me even when I am in meds (another good point there for anyone who wants to use mental illness in their fics even in meds we can do have symptoms). This voice has a name and most of the time he just sorts off passes comments about things and people around me, like a sarcastic narrator and it sounds like he is standing just behind me.

Common Examples:

Malevolent Whispers: Insidious voices that might threaten, taunt, or belittle you.

Hearing Music: Melodies or songs playing that no one else can hear. For me this kind of sounds like someone is playing a radio in a different room.

Environmental Sounds: Hearing footsteps, doors creaking, or other sounds suggesting someone else is present.

Command Hallucinations: Voices that instruct or suggest (its not always ademand, sometimes more subtle and manipulative) you to do certain things, often with a compelling and distressing sense of urgency.

Less used examples:

Kind/supportive hallucinations: Voices that are encouraging, reassuring and supportive.

Distortion: Rather than sounds with no origin hallucinations that disort or warp actual sounds/voices changing the meaning, making it as if the TV or Radio is addressing you personally, making it sound as if a friend is threatening you.

Fun fact: it actually is possible to have a two way (sort of) conversation with a hallucination - I know I do it relatively often. It will be different for everyone, but fo me its a bit like having a conversation on a bad phoneline, yes the voice will respond but often its almost as if he hasn't fully heard what I said - or is ignoring key points. I can do this both outloud and "in my head".

Visual Hallucinations

Description: Visual hallucinations involve seeing things that are not present. These can range from simple shapes and flashes of light to detailed images or scenes. They often appear as if they are in the physical world and can be very convincing.

Common Examples:

Shadowy Figures: Seeing indistinct, shadowy forms that may move or appear to watch the character.

Distorted Faces: Perceiving familiar faces as grotesque or altered in frightening ways.

Apparitions: Full-bodied figures that may interact with the character or appear menacing.

Lights/sparkles: The whump community seems to very much enjoy lights and sparkles, especially in drugging.

Less Used Examples:

Intrusive Visuals: Images of disturbing or graphic nature that suddenly appear in your line of sight.

Perceptual Distortions: Objects appearing to warp, change shape, or color in unnatural ways.

Double Vision: Seeing multiples of objects or people, creating a confusing and disorienting experience.

Scenery Shifts: The entire environment changes, making you believe they are in a completely different place.

Fun fact: Sleep deprivation can cause some wild visual hallucinations, even relatively "mild" sleep deprivation can start to effect a persons perceptions.

Gustatory Hallucinations

Description: Gustatory hallucinations involve tasting things that are not actually present in the mouth. These can range from pleasant to extremely unpleasant tastes and can be triggered without any external food or drink.

Officially these are considered "rare", but personally (as someone who has done a lot of peer support work in the psychosis/voice hearing community I think they are simply under reported.)

Common Examples:

Bitter or Metallic Taste: A persistent bitter or metallic taste in the mouth, often leading to a sense of unease or concern about poisoning.

Sweet or Sour Taste: Tasting something sweet or sour unexpectedly, which can be confusing if it doesn’t match the current context.

Less Used Examples:

Spoiled Food: Tasting something rancid or spoiled, causing nausea and distress.

Unfamiliar Tastes: Tasting something completely unfamiliar and hard to describe, adding to the character's sense of disorientation.

Mimicking Actual Foods: Tasting specific foods that trigger cravings or aversions, despite not eating anything.

Transforming food: Food tasting like other food - I know someone for whom everything tasted like strawberries for days.

Common Causes: Neurological conditions or can be a side effect of medications.

Olfactory Hallucinations

Description: Olfactory hallucinations involve smelling odors that are not actually present. These can be pleasant or unpleasant and occur without any corresponding external stimulus. They can be particularly disorienting because they may trigger memories or emotions associated with certain scents - extremely complex if the person also has PTSD.

Common Examples:

Burning Smell: Wood, rubber, or food, which can lead to panic and fear of a fire.

Rotting Flesh: An overpowering smell of decay or rotting flesh, causing distress and nausea.

Perfume or Flowers: Smelling strong scents like flowers or perfume - hallucinations don't have to be inherently unpleasant sensations.

Less Used Examples:

Chemical Smells: Smelling chemicals like bleach or petrol.

Unfamiliar Scents: Smelling odors that you cannot identify.

Food Smells: Smelling specific foods that trigger hunger or nausea, despite the absence of any actual food.

Tactile Hallucinations

Description: Tactile hallucinations involve feeling sensations on or under the skin that are not actually there. These can range from mild tingling to severe pain and can be extremely distressing.

Common Examples:

Crawling Sensation: Feeling as though insects or bugs are crawling on or under the skin - often leading to frantic scratching or picking.

Electric Shocks: Experiencing sudden, sharp, electric-like jolts.

Pressure: Feeling pressure or tightness around certain body parts, such as a hand gripping the arm or something heavy on the chest.

Less Used Examples:

Temperature Changes: Feeling extreme cold or heat on the skin without any external cause.

Wetness or Dripping: Feeling as though liquid is dripping or running down the skin, even when dry.

Phantom Touches: Sensations of being touched or grabbed, often when alone. Sometimes its an almost feather like touch, other times its more akin to a grab that if reak would leave a bruise.

Right now let's expand - because there are more than 5 senses.

Proprioceptive Hallucinations

Description: Proprioception is the sense of the relative positioning of one's body parts. Proprioceptive hallucinations involve distorted perceptions of where your body is in space or how it is moving.

Common Examples:

Floating Sensation: Feeling as if the body is levitating or moving without control.

Distorted Body Size: Perceiving limbs or the entire body as being unnaturally large or small.

Less Used Examples:

Misaligned Limbs: Feeling as though limbs are twisted or out of place.

Movement Hallucinations: Sensing movements that aren't occurring, like swaying or rotating.

Common causes: Neurological disorders or the effects of certain drugs, but can by caused by a huge array of things.

Vestibular Hallucinations

Description: Vestibular sensations involve balance and spatial orientation. Vestibular hallucinations affect your sense of balance, making you feel dizzy or as though you're moving when you're stationary.

Common Examples:

Vertigo: A spinning sensation, as if the environment or oneself is rotating.

Imbalance: Feeling as though you're about to fall over or can't maintain your balance.

Less Used Examples:

Motion Sensation: Sensing movement, like rocking or swaying, when you're still.

Gravity Distortions: Feeling as if gravity is stronger or weaker than it actually is.

Common caused: Inner ear issues, migraines, or anxiety.

Temporal Hallucinations

Description: Temporal hallucinations involve distorted perceptions of time. They can make time feel like it's speeding up, slowing down, or standing still.

Common Examples:

Time Dilation: Feeling as though time is passing much slower than it actually is.

Time Compression: Perceiving time as moving rapidly, making events feel like they're passing in a blur.

Less Used Examples:

Frozen Moments: Experiencing time as if it's stopped, with everything around you appearing frozen.

Temporal Displacement: Feeling as though you're living in a different time period.

Temporal Dissonance: Feeling as if time is moving differently for you in comparison to those around you.

Common caused: Extreme fatigue, high stress, or under the influence of certain drugs.

Interoceptive Hallucinations

Description: Interoception refers to the perception of sensations from within the body, such as hunger, thirst, or the feeling of a heartbeat. Hallucinations in this realm involve feeling internal sensations that aren't actually occurring.

Common Examples:

False Hunger: Feeling extremely hungry despite having eaten recently.

Nonexistent Thirst: An intense sense of thirst even when well-hydrated - I have had this one a few times and given myself electrolyte imbalances due tot he amount of water I ended up drinking (not fun).

Less Used Examples:

Phantom Heartbeats: Feeling the heart racing or skipping beats without any physical basis.

Digestive Sensations: Sensations of digestion, such as gurgling or bloating, without any real cause.

Common causes: Panic disorder or certain types of seizures.

Right, now lets quickly review the main "causes" of hallucinations

Mental Illness:

Schizophrenia: Can involve basically anything from this list, but anecdotally auditory and visual appear to be the most common.

Bipolar Disorder: Can include hallucinations, especially during manic or depressive episodes.

Schizoaffective Disorder: A combination of symptoms from both schizophrenia and mood disorders, often leading to a variety of hallucinations.

EUPD/BPD: Auditory hallucinations are relatively common.

In all of these the hallucinations will rarely (if ever) exist in isolation. If you do not have primary or secondary experience of mental illness then I would recommend doing a LOT of research - and talking to people who do (on this note my asks are open if anyone has any schizoaffective based questions).

Neurological Conditions:

Epilepsy: Particularly temporal lobe epilepsy, can cause a range of sensory hallucinations.

Parkinson's Disease: Can lead to visual and auditory hallucinations.

Migraine: Migraine auras can include visual and auditory hallucinations.

Once again the hallucinations will not be in isolatation so same advice as with mental illness.

Substance Use and Withdrawal:

Psychedelics: Drugs like LSD, psilocybin, and mescaline are known for causing vivid visual and auditory hallucinations.

Stimulants: Methamphetamine and cocaine can cause tactile and visual hallucinations.

Alcohol Withdrawal: Can lead to visual, auditory, and tactile hallucinations.

You know what I am going to say that my "if you do not have experience of this then go talk to someone who does" advice may just stand for every potential cause.

Sleep Disorders:

Sleep Deprivation: Can cause a variety of hallucinations across different senses.

Narcolepsy: Often includes hypnagogic (while falling asleep) and hypnopompic (while waking up) hallucinations.

Medical Conditions:

Delirium: Acute confusion and hallucinations often seen in severe infections, fever, or after surgery.

Dementia: Especially Lewy body dementia and Alzheimer's disease, can cause hallucinations.

Medications:

Anticholinergics: Can cause hallucinations as a side effect.

Steroids: High doses can sometimes lead to hallucinations.

Certain Antidepressants and Antipsychotics: Occasionally, these medications can cause hallucinations.

Psychological Stress and Trauma:

PTSD: Flashbacks and hallucinations related to traumatic events.

Extreme Stress: Can sometimes trigger hallucinations.

Metabolic and Endocrine Disorders:

Thyroid Disorders: Hyperthyroidism or hypothyroidism can sometimes cause hallucinations.

Electrolyte Imbalances: Severe imbalances can lead to hallucinations.

Deprivation:

Sensory Deprivation: Go google the ganzfeld effect, it's facinating.

Isolation: Extended periods of isolation can lead to hallucinations, known as sensory deprivation hallucinations.

Autoimmune Disorders:

Lupus: Can cause neurological symptoms including hallucinations.

Tumors:

Brain Tumors: Depending on their location, they can cause hallucinations affecting different senses.

Ok, finally point for this post. Let's discuss insight, because it is not as black/white or binary as people seem to assume.

Definition: Insight, in this context, refers to the awareness and understanding that one's hallucinations are not real but are a product of their mind. Insight can be partial or complete, and it often fluctuates.

Complete Insight:

Description: The individual fully understands that their hallucinations are not real and are caused by an underlying condition.

Impact: This can help the person manage their symptoms more effectively and seek appropriate treatment. However, it doesn't necessarily lessen the distress caused by the hallucinations.

Partial Insight:

Description: The individual has some awareness that their hallucinations might not be real but can still struggle with differentiating them from reality.

Impact: This can lead to confusion and anxiety, as the person oscillates between believing and doubting their experiences.

Lack of Insight:

Description: The individual firmly believes that their hallucinations are real and external.

Impact: This can lead to significant distress and functional impairment, as the person might respond to these hallucinations as if they were real.

Now imagine these three points on a scale from 0 (complete insight) to 10 (lack of insight) a person can be anywhere on this scale, and can slide back and fourth along it.

Factors such as stress, fatigue, medication changes, or daily fluctuations in mental state can cause insight to vary. A person might have high insight at one moment and low insight the next.

Basically Insight Is Not Static.

Also sometimes insight is just FREAKING RANDOM fluctuation for no discernible reason - honestly at times there is zero logic.

so ye, halluncinations… the brain is freaking wild.

Disclaimer - this is by no means an exhaustive list and like with many things every individual will experience these things slightly differently.

A similar post about delirium A similar post about fever

#hallucinations #whump community #whump thoughts #whump tropes #whump prompts #hallucination whump #drugged whump #mental illness whump #altered consciousness whump #whump resource #whump reference

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macgyvermedical · 1 month

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Schizophrenia

Hi all, I know I've been a little absent as of late. The reason for that, as you may know if you've been reading my personal posts, is that I got diagnosed with schizophrenia.

Because this blog is ostensibly about medical things, I figured I would come back to that by talking a little bit about schizospec illnesses. What they are, what they're not, and what you need to know if you're writing a character with something on the schizophrenia spectrum.

Schizophrenia is a change in perception and thought that manifests in 3 main ways. The first way is what everyone tends to think of, which is hallucinations and delusions. These are called positive symptoms.

To have hallucinations means you experience things in the world that other people don't. For example, hearing voices (which can be external, as though the person is actually hearing them, or internal, where the voices are coming from inside the person's head, but the person can't control them) is a common hallucination for people with schizospec illnesses. Hallucinations can also be seeing, smelling, or feeling things that others can't.

Delusions are fixed false beliefs. Such as, believing that someone is out to hurt you or that someone is trying to send you a secret message via television, or that other people can read your thoughts, or that you're someone who is particularly important (a head of state, Jesus, or a superhero, for instance). Even when these beliefs are confronted with facts, the person still holds the belief, often able to explain away the facts as not applying to their situation. Some people can know that a delusion is false (or that people would think they were crazy if they said it out loud) and still believe that it's true at the same time.

The next type of symptoms are what are called negative symptoms. This is where it is difficult to think of things, speak coherently, socialize, or express emotions. The person might have what is called a "flat" affect, or where they don't display emotion on their face naturally. They may also experience something called catatonia, where they are conscious but unable to respond to the outside world. Someone who is experiencing catatonia is often hallucinating severely at the same time.

The last type of symptoms are called cognitive. These are symptoms that make critical thinking, decision making, and problem solving difficult. This might be that they're constantly distracted by hallucinations, but it can also just be that the person has trouble making good decisions for themself.

Now, just like autism is a spectrum, schizophrenia is a spectrum as well. In addition to traditional schizophrenia, there are milder forms (often called schizotypal personality disorders), and a combination of schizophrenia and a mood disorder (depression or bipolar disorder most commonly) called schizoaffective disorder.

The "severity" is also different for different people. Some people are able to lead nearly normal lives with the occasional hallucination or be able to work through delusions with skills gained from counseling, even if they don't take medication. Some are well controlled on medication and as long as they take it, they can keep a job and have a nearly normal family and social life. Some may be moderately well controlled on medication, and be able to work part time, but symptoms and/or side effects from the medication make it difficult to work full time or have a normal social life.

Still others may be unable to work due to symptoms or side effects from medication, or the amount of time and effort it takes to manage symptoms or side effects makes having time for a job or social life difficult. Still others may need to live in assisted living or a group home, where someone else is managing food and medications for them, because of the amount of time, effort, and skill necessary to manage the schizophrenia is so great.

Schizophrenia is usually treated with a combination of counseling and medication, just like a lot of mental illnesses. A person with schizophrenia may also need the occasional inpatient stay to more emergently change medications if they get a flair up and are suddenly unable to take care of themselves (or may be a danger to themselves or others) due to severe symptoms.

The medications usually used to treat schizophrenia are first and second-generation antipsychotics. First generation antipsychotics came out in the 1950s and were the mainstay of treatment for a long time. These are often very good at treating positive symptoms, but cause tiredness and if taken at high doses for a long time a movement disorder called tardive diskinesia.

Second generation antipsychotics came out in the 1990's through today, and tend to cause a lot less sedation (my experience is they actually gave me energy) but often cause weight gain and metabolic syndromes like diabetes (though taking them concurrently with metformin tends to reduce this risk).

It's kind of a pick your poison situation.

Also, antipsychotics (especially second generation ones) tend not to completely take away symptoms. They instead make them easier to manage. Usually it is through a combination of therapy like cognitive behavioral therapy for psychosis (CBTp) and a medication or two that symptoms are well managed.

Social support is often necessary too. This can be help with finding housing and health insurance, but it can also be facilitated social events, group therapy, or support groups. Since a lot of people with schizophrenia have trouble making friends in the wild, these can be very helpful in building social and emotional skills safely.

I hope this gave you a good overview of what schizophrenia spectrum illnesses are like. If you have any questions feel free to send them my way!

#whump reference #writing reference #medical #mental health #schizophrenia

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thefooloutboy · 2 months

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all the things wrong with lestat de lioncourt according to the dsm-v and psychological theories

In this post, I, a psychologist, will psychoanalyze and diagnose Lestat de Lioncourt, a well-known vampire in gothic literature.

Part I: DSM-V Diagnosis

1.0 Neurodevelopmental Disorders

1.1 Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD):

ADHD is a persistent pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity that interferes with functioning or development.

Lestat displays 5 symptoms out of 9 for inattention:

Often has difficulty sustaining attention in tasks: He can’t read.

Often does not follow through on instructions and fails to finish schoolwork, chores, or duties in the workplace: He does not ever follow instructions.

Often has difficulty organizing tasks and activities: He fails to keep his house and belongings organized.

Often avoids, dislikes, or is reluctant to engage in tasks that require sustained mental effort.

Is often forgetful in daily activities: He’s bad with doing chores and running errands.

Lestat displays 5 symptoms out of 9 for hyperactivity and impulsivity:

Often unable to play or engage in leisure activities quietly: He’s always making noises.

Is often “on the go,” acting as if “driven by a motor”: He is usually unable to be still for extended time.

Often talks excessively: He is a yapper.

Often blurts out an answer before a question has been completed: He completes people’s sentences and he cannot wait for his turn in conversation.

Often interrupts or intrudes on others: He butts into conversations and he intrudes into or takes over what others are doing.

To be diagnosed with ADHD, one must display at least 10 symptoms out of 18. Therefore, Lestat can be diagnosed with ADHD.

2.0 Schizophrenia Spectrum and Other Psychotic Disorders

2.1 Delusional Disorder:

Delusional Disorder is characterized by the presence of one (or more) delusions with a duration of 1 month or longer. Lestat’s disorder is the Mixed type, meaning that not one single type of delusion predominates, but there’s a mixture. His disorder includes:

Grandiose type: Belief that one is famous, omnipotent, wealthy, or otherwise very powerful: At the end of S2.E8, we see Lestat practicing piano with a block of wood and thinking he’s going on tour.

Jealous type: Belief that their spouse or lover is unfaithful: He constantly watches Louis to see if he will cheat on him or not.

Persecutory type: Belief that they are being conspired against: In S1.E7, we see Lestat thinking Louis and Claudia are conspiring something against him and he makes Antoinette spy on them. (In the persecutory type, it does not matter if the person is actually being conspired against, it’s the obsession that counts.)

2.2 Schizoaffective Disorder:

Schizoaffective Disorder is characterized by an uninterrupted period of illness during which there is a major mood episode (major depressive or manic) concurrent with at least 2 criteria out of 5 of schizophrenia.

Lestat displays 2 symptoms of schizophrenia (A):

Delusions (mentioned above)

Hallucinations: He is haunted by Claudia.

Lestat also displays the main symptom of a major mood episode, which is depressed mood. We can see his depression and the symptoms of his schizoaffective disorder (delusions, hallucinations, and depressed mood) portrayed in several episodes, but mainly S2.E8.

3.0 Bipolar and Related Disorders

3.1 Bipolar I Disorder:

For a diagnosis of bipolar I disorder, it is necessary to meet the following criteria for a manic episode. Lestat displays 5 symptoms out of 7 for a manic episode in S2.E7:

Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity.

More talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking.

Distractibility (attention too easily drawn to irrelevant external stimuli).

Increase in goal-directed activity.

Excessive involvement in activities that have a high potential for painful consequences.

The trial is followed with a depressive episode on his side, therefore, he displays the two distinct ends of Bipolar I: manic episode followed by a depressive episode. Lestat, according to this, can be diagnosed with Bipolar I Disorder.

4.0 Depressive Disorders

4.1 Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder:

Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder is characterized by severe recurrent temper outbursts manifested verbally (e.g., verbal rages) and/or behaviorally (e.g., physical aggression toward people or property) that are grossly out of proportion in intensity or duration to the situation or provocation.

In many episodes, we can see Lestat being verbally and physically aggressive towards Claudia and Louis, let alone many others that he later kills. In the DSM-V, it is concluded that Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder and Bipolar I Disorder cannot coexist, so it is not safe to say Lestat 100% have this disorder, but I thought it was worth mentioning as he displays the symptoms for it.

4.2 Persistent Depressive Disorder (Dysthymia):

Dysthymia is characterized by a depressed mood for most of the day, for more days than not, as indicated by either subjective account or observation by others, for at least 2 years.

Lestat displays 4 symptoms out of 6 for Dysthymia in S2.E8 and later in the song Long Face:

Poor appetite or overeating: ‘I'll get fatter when we break up.’ In this lyric, he mentions how he overeats (or rather overdrains people).

Low self-esteem.

Poor concentration or difficulty making decisions.

Feelings of hopelessness.

In the DSM-V, it is stated that there has not been a manic or hypomanic episode during the period of Dysthymia, which we cannot be sure if that is the case with Lestat, as I diagnosed him with Bipolar I earlier. However, S2.E8 and the Vampire Lestat era happens well after S2.E7, so we can assume that he had not had a manic episode and his mood disorder turned into Dysthymia.

5.0 Anxiety Disorders

5.1 Separation Anxiety Disorder:

Separation Anxiety Disorder is characterized by developmentally inappropriate and excessive fear or anxiety concerning separation from those to whom the individual is attached.

Lestat displays at least 4 symptoms out of 8 for Separation Anxiety Disorder:

Recurrent excessive distress when anticipating or experiencing separation from home or from major attachment figures: He constantly tries to make Louis stay because he is scared of him leaving.

Persistent and excessive worry about losing major attachment figures or about possible harm to them, such as illness, injury, disasters, or death: ‘Did you hurt yourself?’

Persistent reluctance or refusal to sleep away from home or to go to sleep without being near a major attachment figure.

Persistent and excessive fear of or reluctance about being alone or without major attachment figures at home or in other settings: He tries to win Louis back because he is scared of being without him.

Therefore, it is possible to say Lestat can be diagnosed with Separation Anxiety Disorder, as he himself mentions how he does not like being left behind.

6.0 Obsessive-Compulsive and Related Disorders

6.1 Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD):

OCD is the presence of obsessions, compulsions, or both.

Lestat displays 2 symptoms out of 2 for obsessions:

Recurrent and persistent thoughts, urges, or images that are experienced, at some time during the disturbance, as intrusive and unwanted, and that in most individuals cause marked anxiety or distress: In S2.E8, he mentions his recurrent thoughts about Claudia and how he cannot get over it.

The individual attempts to ignore or suppress such thoughts, urges, or images, or to neutralize them with some other thought or action.

Lestat also displays symptoms out of 2 for compulsions:

Repetitive behaviors that the individual feels driven to perform in response to an obsession or according to rules that must be applied rigidly: He plays the piano as he did with Claudia to get rid of the obsession.

The behaviors or mental acts are aimed at preventing or reducing anxiety or distress.

To be diagnosed with OCD, any of these 4 symptoms is necessary, and Lestat, arguably, displays all of them, so he is diagnosed with OCD by me.

7.0 Trauma- and Stressor-Related Disorders

7.1 Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD):

PTSD is a disorder that develops in some people who have experienced a shocking, scary, or dangerous event. There are several criteria to be diagnosed with it.

Lestat displays 3 symptoms out of 4 for exposure to actual or threatened death, and serious injury:

Directly experiencing the traumatic event: Claudia and Louis attempted to kill him.

Witnessing, in person, the event as it occurred to others: He was there to watch the Trial and he witnessed Claudia dying.

Learning that the traumatic event occurred to a close family member or close friend: He learned that Louis tried to harm himself.

Lestat displays 4 symptoms out of 5 for presence of intrusion symptoms associated with the traumatic event:

Recurrent, involuntary, and intrusive distressing memories of the traumatic event: He cannot get the death of Claudia out of his mind. He also still thinks about Louis harming himself.

Dissociative reactions (e.g., flashbacks) in which the individual feels or acts as if the traumatic event were recurring.

Intense or prolonged psychological distress at exposure to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event.

Marked physiological reactions to internal or external cues that symbolize or resemble an aspect of the traumatic event.

Lestat’s PTSD is multifaceted, as there have been several different traumatic events that had shocked him and endangered him (e.g., Magnus, the Trial, S1.E7, the death of Nicki). According to Sam Reid, Claudia will haunt Lestat in S3, so we will see more of his reactions to his PTSD.

8.0 Feeding and Eating Disorders

8.1 Pica:

Pica is characterized by persistent eating of nonnutritive, nonfood substances over a period of at least 1 month. Which is, pretty much, seen in every vampire. It does not take a psychologist to diagnose vampires with Pica. They are Pica.

8.2 Avoidant/Restrictive Food Intake Disorder:

ARFID is characterized by an eating or feeding disturbance as manifested by the person avoiding certain foods. As can be seen in many episodes, Lestat constantly judges Louis for feeding only from animals instead of humans. Lestat prefers human blood only, making him a restrictive food intaker.

8.3 Binge Eating Disorder:

Binge Eating Disorder is characterized by recurrent episodes of binge eating.

Lestat displays 2 out of 2 symptoms for an episode of binge eating:

Eating, in a discrete period of time, an amount of food that is definitely larger than what most people would eat in a similar period of time under similar circumstances.

A sense of lack of control over eating during the episode.

In the song ‘Long Face’, Lestat talks about binge feeding after a breakup in which he eventually gains weight from the amount of blood he consumes. Do vampires get overweight? I don’t know, but that’s what he says, so I diagnose him with Binge Eating Disorder.

9.0 Disruptive, Impulse-Control, and Conduct Disorders

9.1 Oppositional Defiant Disorder:

Oppositional Defiant Disorder is a pattern of angry/irritable mood, argumentative/defiant behavior, or vindictiveness lasting at least 6 months.

Lestat displays 6 symptoms out of 8 for Oppositional Defiant Disorder:

Often loses temper: e.g. when playing chess with Claudia, when Claudia came back and he beat up Louis.

Is often touchy or easily annoyed.

Is often angry and resentful.

Often deliberately annoys others.

Often blames others for his or her mistakes or misbehavior.

Has been spiteful or vindictive at least twice within the past 6 months.

Therefore, it can be easily said that Lestat is not a bad person, he is just mentally ill.

9.2 Intermittent Explosive Disorder:

Intermittent Explosive Disorder is characterized by recurrent behavioral outbursts representing a failure to control aggressive impulses.

Lestat displays 2 symptoms out of 2 for failure to control aggressive impulses:

Verbal aggression or physical aggression toward property, animals, or other individuals: Going crazy after losing in chess, choking Claudia, beating up Louis.

Three behavioral outbursts involving damage or destruction of property and/or physical assault involving physical injury against animals or other individuals occurring within a 12-month period: It possibly happens more for Lestat.

10.0 Personality Disorders

10.1 Borderline Personality Disorder:

BPD is a pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships, self-image, and affects, and marked impulsivity, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts.

Lestat displays 7 symptoms out of 9 for Borderline Personality Disorder:

Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment: He does everything in order to keep Louis.

A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and devaluation.

Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self.

Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging: Cheating on partners, money spending, substance abuse can be seen in Lestat.

Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood.

Chronic feelings of emptiness.

Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (as mentioned in Disruptive & Impulse-Control Disorders).

As guessed by many people, BPD is the disorder that Lestat relates to the most. He obviously displays a lot of symptoms of it and therefore easily can be diagnosed with it by any professional.

10.2 Histrionic Personality Disorder:

Histrionic Personality Disorder is characterized by a pervasive pattern of excessive emotionality and attention seeking, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts.

Lestat displays 6 symptoms out of 8 for Histrionic Personality Disorder:

Is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention.

Interaction with others is often characterized by inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior.

Displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions.

Consistently uses physical appearance to draw attention to self.

Shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion.

Considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are.

Lestat can easily be seen as ‘the life of the party’ and if he is not the center of the attention, you best believe he will do something about it. He displays enough symptoms to be diagnosed with HPD.

11.0 Paraphilic Disorders

11.1 Voyeuristic Disorder:

Voyeuristic Disorder is characterized by recurrent and intense sexual arousal from observing an unsuspecting person who is naked, in the process of disrobing, or engaging in sexual activity, as manifested by fantasies, urges, or behaviors.

In S1.E1 we see that Lestat likes watching Louis having sex with another woman. Louis asks Lestat, ‘That’s your thing? You like to watch?’.

11.2 Sexual Masochism Disorder:

Sexual Masochism is recurrent and intense sexual arousal from the act of being humiliated, beaten, bound, or otherwise made to suffer, as manifested by fantasies, urges, or behaviors.

When Dreamstat comes back to Louis, there is a scene in which Lestat provokes Louis by saying ‘Kill me again.’, and he laughs as Louis hits him, chokes him, and although that is Louis’ dream of Lestat, I think it’s safe to say Lestat had enjoyed that kind of behavior before. When Louis takes Lestat back, we also see how beaten up Lestat is, and it happens after they have sex.

Part II: Psychological Theories

1.0 Social Exchange Theory:

Social Exchange Theory is a concept based on the idea that social behavior is the result of an exchange process. According to this theory, people weigh the potential benefits and risks of their social relationships. When the risks outweigh the rewards, they will terminate or abandon the relationship. The purpose of this exchange is to maximize benefits and minimize costs.

Lestat lives his life by this theory. He is often driven by his desires and passions. He craves companionship and love but also seeks dominance and control over others.

Costs:

Emotional Turmoil: Lestat's intense relationships often lead to emotional conflicts and suffering, both for him and his companions.

Risk of Rejection: His desire for deep connections makes him vulnerable to rejection and betrayal, as seen with Louis.

Loneliness: Despite seeking companionship, Lestat frequently finds himself isolated due to his nature and actions.

Rewards:

Companionship: Lestat values the presence of others, particularly those who can understand his nature and share his experiences.

Power and Control: He often derives satisfaction from having power over others, which boosts his sense of significance and dominance.

Excitement and Adventure: Lestat’s relationships often bring new experiences and adventures, which he craves as part of his rebellious spirit.

His interactions are driven by the pursuit of rewards such as companionship, power, and adventure, while also dealing with the costs of emotional turmoil, conflict, and isolation.

2.0 Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs:

This psychological theory posits that human motivations are structured in a hierarchy, ranging from basic physiological needs to self-actualization. Lestat’s actions and motivations often reflect his quest to fulfill these needs, from the basic physiological requirement for blood to his pursuit of self-actualization through personal growth and creative expression.

Needs:

Physiological:

Vampiric Thirst: As a vampire, Lestat's primary physiological need is the consumption of blood. This need drives many of his actions, ensuring his survival.

Immortality: Unlike humans, Lestat doesn't need food, water, or shelter in the traditional sense. His physiological need is centered around obtaining blood and ensuring his physical survival as an immortal being.

Safety:

Physical Safety: Lestat seeks to protect himself from threats, both from humans and other vampires. This includes avoiding vampire hunters and rival vampires who may wish to harm him.

Existential Safety: Lestat grapples with the existential nature of his immortality and seeks to find stability in his long existence. This often involves creating and maintaining secure environments where he can exist without threat.

Love and Belongingness:

Companionship: Lestat's relationships with Louis, Claudia, and others highlight his deep need for companionship and belonging. Despite his often domineering nature, Lestat craves intimate connections.

Vampire Family: His creation of a vampire family with Louis and Claudia is an attempt to fulfill his need for love and belonging. He seeks to create a close-knit group that can understand and share his experiences.

Esteem:

Respect and Recognition: Lestat desires recognition and respect from both humans and vampires. His flamboyant and rebellious behavior often serves as a way to assert his presence and command attention.

Self-Esteem: Lestat struggles with his self-esteem, oscillating between grandiosity and self-doubt. He seeks validation through his actions and the admiration of others.

Self Actualization:

Personal Growth: Lestat's journey throughout the series is marked by his pursuit of knowledge, self-discovery, and personal growth. He constantly seeks to understand his place in the world and the meaning of his existence.

Art and Music: Lestat's involvement in the arts, particularly his passion for music, is an expression of his self-actualization. These creative pursuits allow him to explore and express his individuality and inner world.

Transcendence: At times, Lestat seeks experiences that go beyond his own existence, exploring the metaphysical and spiritual aspects of being a vampire. This includes his encounters with ancient vampires and other supernatural beings.

3.0 The Myers-Briggs Test (MBTI):

The MBTI categorizes personalities into 16 types based on four dichotomies:

Extraversion (E) vs. Introversion (I)

Extraversion (E): Lestat is highly extraverted. He thrives on interaction with others and seeks out social engagement, whether with humans or other vampires. He loves being the center of attention, often drawing others to him with his charm and charisma.

Sensing (S) vs. Intuition (N)

Intuition (N): Lestat is intuitive, often looking beyond the surface to understand deeper meanings and possibilities. He is driven by his curiosity and desire for new experiences and knowledge.

Thinking (T) vs. Feeling (F)

Feeling (F): Although Lestat can be calculating and strategic, his decisions are often influenced by his emotions and personal values. He experiences intense emotions and is deeply affected by his relationships and experiences.

Judging (J) vs. Perceiving (P)

Perceiving (P): Lestat is spontaneous, adaptable, and often prefers to keep his options open. He is not one for strict plans or routines and enjoys the freedom to explore and act on impulse.

Lestat's personality aligns well with the ENFP type in the Myers-Briggs framework. His extraversion, intuition, emotional depth, and spontaneous nature define his character and drive his actions.

4.0 Freud’s Ego Psychology:

Freud's model of the psyche is composed of three main elements: the Id, the Ego, and the Superego. Each of these components plays a critical role in shaping an individual's actions and interactions. Through this psychology, Lestat can be understood as a dynamic interplay between his Id-driven desires, his Ego's attempts to navigate reality, and his Superego's moral contemplations.

The Id:

Desires and Instincts: Lestat's Id is strongly represented by his vampiric desires and instincts. His need for blood, thrill-seeking behavior, and hedonistic pursuits are driven by the Id's demand for immediate gratification. Lestat’s frequent indulgence in bloodlust, his desire for power, and his pursuit of pleasure without concern for consequences highlight his Id-driven actions. His transformation into a vampire amplifies these primal desires.

The Ego:

Reality Principle: Lestat’s Ego attempts to balance his powerful Id with the demands of reality. This is evident in his strategic thinking and ability to navigate the complexities of human and vampire societies. Lestat's efforts to create a successful career as a rock star and his ability to form and maintain complex relationships (despite their tumultuous nature) demonstrate his Ego at work. He often calculates his actions to achieve his desires while managing external realities.

The Superego:

Moral Conscience: Lestat’s Superego is less dominant than his Id, but it is still present. His reflections on morality, guilt, and his existential musings show the influence of his Superego. Lestat's internal conflicts and occasional guilt over his actions indicate the presence of his Superego. His moments of introspection, particularly when he questions the morality of his vampiric existence, highlight this aspect of his psyche.

Lestat experiences significant internal conflicts between his Id, Ego, and Superego. His hedonistic desires often clash with his moments of moral contemplation and the need to adapt to reality. He often projects his own desires and frustrations onto others, such as Louis and Claudia. His complex relationships involve elements of transference, where he relives past traumas and desires through his interactions with them.

5.0 Jung’s Archetypes:

Jung's theory of archetypes suggests that there are universal, archaic symbols and images that derive from the collective unconscious. These archetypes manifest in literature and myths, often embodying fundamental human experiences and traits.

The Self:

Integration and Wholeness: Throughout the series, Lestat's journey can be seen as a quest for integration and self-understanding. He seeks to reconcile his various aspects and achieve a sense of wholeness.

The Shadow:

Dark Aspects: Lestat's Shadow includes his violent tendencies, selfish desires, and the darker aspects of his vampiric nature. He often grapples with these parts of himself, leading to internal conflict and moral ambiguity.

The Anima:

Feminine Qualities: Lestat's Anima is reflected in his deep emotional connections and his capacity for empathy and love, despite his often ruthless behavior. His relationships with Louis and Claudia reveal his nurturing and protective sides.

The Persona:

Public Face: Lestat's Persona is highly cultivated, presenting himself as charismatic, charming, and flamboyant. He is a performer both literally (as a rock star) and metaphorically, often masking his deeper, more troubled self.

The Hero:

Quest and Challenges: Lestat embodies the Hero archetype through his constant quest for meaning, adventure, and self-discovery. He faces numerous challenges and often acts as a catalyst for change in the vampire world.

The Trickster:

Mischief and Chaos: Lestat often plays the role of the Trickster, causing disruption and challenging societal norms. His rebellious nature and tendency to create chaos reflect this archetype.

His public Persona, the dark Shadow, the nurturing Anima, the heroic quest, the Trickster's chaos, and the journey towards the Self all contribute to his multifaceted character.

6.0 Attachment Theory:

Attachment theory, developed by John Bowlby and later expanded by Mary Ainsworth, examines how early relationships with caregivers shape an individual's patterns of attachment and behavior in later relationships.

Lestat's early life as a human was marked by complex relationships with his family, particularly his mother, Gabrielle. His father was neglectful and abusive, while his mother was more supportive but distant due to her own struggles. These early experiences likely influenced Lestat's attachment style, contributing to his complex and often tumultuous relationships later in life.

Disorganized Attachment: Lestat exhibits traits of disorganized attachment, characterized by a mix of anxious and avoidant behaviors. His relationships are marked by intense emotions, fear of abandonment, and difficulty maintaining stable bonds. This theory highlights his struggles with intimacy, fear of abandonment, and need for control.

7.0 Social Identity Theory:

This theory explores how individuals derive a sense of identity and self-esteem from their membership in social groups, and how these group dynamics influence intergroup behavior.

Social Categorization:

Vampire Identity: Lestat categorizes himself primarily as a vampire, which becomes a core aspect of his identity. This categorization distinguishes him from humans and other supernatural beings. Lestat's transformation into a vampire and his subsequent embrace of vampiric traits and behaviors mark his entry into this distinct social category. He frequently identifies himself as part of the vampire world, even when challenging its norms.

Social Identification:

Group Membership: Lestat identifies strongly with the vampire community, despite often rebelling against its rules and leaders. His identity as a vampire shapes his actions, relationships, and self-perception. Lestat’s relationships with other vampires, such as Louis, Claudia, Armand, and even ancient vampires like Akasha, reflect his deep connection to the vampire identity. His desire to understand and sometimes reshape the vampire world shows his commitment to this group.

Social Comparison:

Ingroup vs. Outgroup: Lestat often compares himself and his vampire companions to humans and other supernatural entities. This comparison reinforces his sense of superiority and uniqueness.

His categorization as a vampire, identification with the vampire community, and comparison with humans and other vampires shape his actions and self-perception. The intragroup dynamics, including power struggles, status seeking, and identity crises, further highlight the complexities of his social identity.

8.0 Five Factor Model of Personality:

The Five-Factor Model includes five broad dimensions of personality:

Openness to Experience:

High Openness: Lestat exhibits high levels of openness. He is curious about the world, adventurous, and willing to explore new experiences, both as a vampire and in his human endeavors.

Conscientiousness:

Low to Moderate Conscientiousness: Lestat demonstrates lower levels of conscientiousness. He often acts impulsively and disregards conventional norms or plans.

Extraversion:

High Extraversion: Lestat is highly extraverted. He thrives on social interaction, enjoys being the center of attention, and is energized by engaging with others.

Agreeableness:

Low to Moderate Agreeableness: Lestat shows varying levels of agreeableness. While he can be charming and charismatic, his actions often reflect self-interest and a lack of empathy.

Neuroticism:

Moderate to High Neuroticism: Lestat exhibits moderate to high levels of neuroticism. He frequently experiences emotional turmoil, existential angst, and inner conflict.

Lestat’s personality, as analyzed through the Five-Factor Model, reveals a complex character with high openness and extraversion, but lower conscientiousness and agreeableness, alongside significant neuroticism. These traits contribute to his charismatic, adventurous, and often tumultuous nature.

In conclusion, I diagnosed Lestat with 18 mental disorders (according to DSM-V) and analyzed his personality through 8 different psychological theories. I don't necessarily say that I am right, but given the psychology degree I have, I am pretty much sure of what I have concluded here with this.

Much love,

Zenith

#lestat de lioncourt #iwtv lestat #the vampire lestat #rockstar lestat #amc iwtv #iwtv #iwtv s2 #iwtv season 2 #interview with the vampire #psychology #mental health #diagnosis

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phantom-voices · 2 days

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A poem I wrote on May 4th 2022. I have Schizoaffective disorder, manic type. It is both Schizophrenia and Bipolar mixed. I also have Borderline Personality Disorder. I wrote this poem after a psychosis episode. I have hallucinations, mainly auditory. In this episode I kept harming myself due to commands and both arms were badly bruised which my psychiatrist saw. I hope you like and maybe will relate. 🙂

Barren

Tired eyes, heartless voices.

Can’t fight off these hellish noises.

Crazy thoughts and countless dreams.

Cannot think through all the screams.

Lots of hatred but also love

If I can just get help from God above.

Just kneel down and get those prayers in

Insanity has left her barren.

Jessica Clingempeel

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blankmogai · 1 month

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bipolar spectrum flag! (for anyone with bipolar i or ii, schizoaffective disorder, or cyclothymia)

we wanted to make something that was recognizable without being too busy and had colors that recognizably conveyed mania and depression as well as the emotional intensity that comes with them

elaboration on stripe meanings and blank version under the cut :3

each stripe has two meanings; the top and bottom stripes have meanings related to community and recovery and the middle four stripes relate to specific symptoms.

Yellow: Healing and diversity; healing in whatever way is best for you and the diversity within the bipolar spectrum (explicitly incl bipolar i and ii, bipolar due to another medical condition, schizoaffective bipolar type and cyclothymia)

Orange: Hypomania and rapid cycling

Hot pink: Mania and psychosis

Indigo: Major depressive and mixed states

Blue: Minor (subclinical) depressive states and comorbidities

Sky blue: Support and acceptance; each of these coming from both within and outside of the community and especially as a subset of the mad/neurodivergent/disabled communities

The :): / smile-frown is a common symbol of bipolar

@radiomogai @mad-pride (i think both of you are ok with being tagged for archival purposes but sorry if you aren't!)

#op #note: we can't find if there's any better term than bipolar spectrum? i promise it's not a 'youre an extension of x' thing #mad pride #actually bipolar #actuallybipolar #bipolar #bipolar 1 #bipolar 2 #bipolar ii #schizoaffective #cyclothymia #disability pride flag #neurodivergence #liom #liomogai

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froshele · 1 year

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You know we pick on the Aspirant but I think we don't do it comprehensively at all, because even among cultists I think they truly are special.

Nobody else is entirely normal compared to the librarian either. It's just that they have solid reasons to be doing their thing:

1. Exile has the world's most dramatic relationship to his father possible and is hopping continents and cities instead of working it out, sure. But it's (partly) because he's an Antaean, and Duffoure Senior really and genuinely forreal sucks.

2. Dancer is ... in a possibly survival based position that they choose not to leave for better things despite knowing that it's full to the gills with horrific occult threats to wellbeing. To be fair, they are within rights to prefer that to the attention of their patrons, but basically on the we respect sex workers and, what, adult entertainers website I don't really need to elaborate on the fact that whatever Dancer gotta do is whatever Dancer gotta do. At some point it may switch from getting that bag to becoming a chorus dancer for the Thunderskin, or to becoming a full time esoteric furry, but to be honest go sib go I refuse to fault the Dancer for anything they're my favourite. They were in what may be read as an inescapable pipeline and they won that shit, no notes, pack it in everybody.

3. It is a beautiful day and Priest is a terrible priest, actually I'm unsure of what Priest's deal is, I think Priest might just be Priesting correctly. Their religious framework sacralizes their despair and mania, which like, ok, not healthy maybe, but it gets them through the day without chugging opium!

4. Detective and Physician are just ill but functioning guys with jobs who happen to have totally justified brushes with the Mansus and make some rash decisions.

5. Medium??? Is a totally legitimate businesswoman don't even fret about it :)

Aspirant, though. Aspirant isn't forced into their life nor has it thrust upon them nor do they respond in any sense normally to being willed a bunch of occult stuff - they're just, like... Like That, from the jump, from the moment they as a surly hospital janitor have access to occult concepts. And the Like That that they are is totally divorced from their mechanically represented condition; everyone else has the same condition. Nobody else seems to make the same choice for the same reason, Just Because They Can -- the ending text is the same but I think the context, right, the context really does a lot of quite heavy work here.

Everyone else is /capable/ of pursuing one of Aspirant's victories, but, um, they don't really... I mean their heart's not in it, nobody seriously reads it as canon when they do. I bet you didn't even remember it was possible to ascend under a different Hour as the Dancer!

Which brings me to this: nothing at all has happened to make the Aspirant talk or think in their very instrumental and personally cruel type of way. Their existence as a menial hospital worker is far from as precarious as some others', their main gripe seems to just be that it's not very stimulating.

There's no backstory causing it, they're not undead, they seem to have not been working before because they think it's beneath them, they don't metaphysically or personally /need/ to be doing what they do. They do what they do /specifically because they crave that mineral,/ that mineral being for some reason immortality and phenomenal cosmic power.

And they WANT it. They want to be an unspeakable bodiless radiance or an ithastry-golem or one of the Grail's heaps of awful devouring minions more than anyone should have strength to want anything. It's a fixation for them, an obsession, possibly a symptom of their mental illness, since we have to manage what is actually a very strongly crafted but probably unintentional representation of bipolar with schizoaffective traits.

From specifically the point of view of ludonarrative integration I think it's fair to diagnose everybody in that game with a dread-fascination cycle in some capacity with some form of something in that general region. But Aspirant is probably the one with the worst coping mechanisms, and the one in the most need of help -- everybody else has friends or coworkers or voices to talk to at least, and something else to do in their life. The Aspirant... paints ominous pictures and smokes opium.

Exile grieves their dead, you get a card about it and heaps of exposition and all. BYT seems to be doing the whole thing kind of half as a bit at least at first, and I guess you could say they deliberately don't get too close to anyone. Physician is academically curious and honouring a patient's last wishes. Detective is just doing their literal actual rentpaying job. Dancer likewise, at first. Priest. Ghoul, if you want to get deterministic about it. But Aspirant just does all the culty horrible things the others have to be professionally inured to doing, /for no initial reason and with no training at all/ except a desire to cope badly with The Wolf, Despair.

Aspirant is just ... Aspirant. They just... are Aspirant. They're the most Cultist of all the cultists, even the other POV guys in that game.

Whatever Librarian does calmly and from a hinged mental state, no matter how eldritch, has nothing on Aspirant, who woke up one beautiful day [arning, burning, yearning, burning, yearning, burning, yearning, burning, ye] and completely uprooted their entire life to become an antisocial, occult hermit who isn't even very good at it

#book of hours game #cultist simulator #hushposting

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echo-stimmingrose · 8 days

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Real shit I've heard in regards to my adhd and autism

"you shouldn't go on meds for your ADHD because you may become dependent on them." Let me ask you this, what the fuck do you think meds are for?

"but you sit so still-" One, no I don't, I'm usually stimming in some way, and two that's not my issue, I have the attention span of a fucking fruit fly. Aka inattentive type.

Doctor seeing me for the first time- "We can put you on a sedative, that will help with hyperactivity" Again, not hyperactive. Also I have chronic fatigue as is, so no thanks. (They put me on it anyway, I was practically a zombie for months)

Well meaning doctor- "I don't want to put you on a stimulant cause it can increase your anxiety." Yeah okay, but you see, the main source of my anxiety is that I can't get shit done.

After I lose something for the fifteenth time in ten minutes- "how about you make a specific place for everything so you don't lose it?" Genuine question, do neurotypicals consciously set stuff down? Cause I sure as hell don't.

"but it's a super power!" Why does this shit only apply to non physical disabilities? Y'all don't say this to me about my wheelchair why the fuck do you say it about this.

"just try harder to focus!" How about I hit you over the head with a shovel.

"have you tried praying?" Yup. Even had an exorcism done once. All I got was religious trauma funnily enough.

"it's a spectrum because everyone is on it!"/"everyone's a little autistic." Do me a favor and do even the smallest bit of research before you say shit like this, or else I'm gonna run you over like a human bowling pin.

"You don't look autistic though." Please explain this without sounding abelist. You can't, but it will be funny to watch you try.

"You shouldn't be ashamed of your autism, autistic kids are just so cute!" I do not know how to respond to that.

"you hide it so well." Thanks, it's called masking and it's caused detrimental damage to my mental health.

Bonus: Something my great aunt said after I was diagnosed with Schizoaffective disorder (which was a misdiagnosis and was determined to be just bipolar one)

"You're lucky, most schizophrenics are too dangerous for society." There's way too much to unpack there, just stop talking.

#disability #autism #adhd #actually autistic #actually disabled #actually audhd #attention deficit hyperactivity disorder #mental disability #disability rant #echos rambles #personal #personal stuff

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necroromantics · 11 days

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So it’s not Toby I headcanon with BP, it’s Jeff. And it’s kinda the reason why I feel hesitant to write him. I’ve been reading up on stuff recently about BP and how to write characters with the condition, but I was wondering if you had any tips? I don’t want to contribute to any misinformation.

ALL ABOUT BIPOLAR DISORDER + WRITING IT

Warning. This is a very very very long post. LMAO

Ok so when it comes to writing any character, you need to understand that they aren't a real person, they're a storytelling device. They don't really work on the same logic systems of reality like we do in the real world. So when you're writing a character with things like mental health issues, it's important to view it as "How does this contribute to my story" or "How does this fit into the unique logistics of my stories reality"

But in order to bend (not break) the rules when it comes to portraying mental health issues, you need to first know the rules, and then work to weaving that framework of the real world into your fictional world/character.

For example, my OC Tobin has bipolar disorder, but it doesn't really come up in the Creepedverse story cuz it just doesn't fit in as a storytelling device. In reality, throughout the story, Tobin would have at least an episode or two over the course of the year the plot takes place. An important thing to consider is how a characters mental health issues contribute to the story you wanna tell. And if it doesn't, its ok for it to just be a lil side thing you know about.

Now for actual information on Bipolar Disorder (which is shortened to BD, NOT BPD. BPD is a completely separate disorder called "borderline personality disorder", they are very different though people constantly mix them up due to terminology similarities)

There are two main types of bipolar disorder that someone may be diagnosed with, (theres also cyclothymia which is like diet bipolar with hypomania/mild depression, and schizoaffective bipolar which is like schizophrenia and bipolar mixed, but Im not getting into those today). When writing a character with BD, its very important to note how the disorder actually effects them. Remember, a disorder is something that causes a person significant dysfunction and impairment in their day to day life. It negatively impacts them in many ways such as personal distress, their relationships, job, finances, etc.

Bipolar Type 1: The requirement for being diagnosed with type 1 is the presence of an episode of extremely high energy/moods that lasts more than a week, OR ends up being so severe the person gets hospitalized. This lengthy period of high moods is called a manic episode, which Ill get into later. You only need to have experienced one manic episode to qualify for a bipolar diagnosis. Thats why you can only experience mania if you are bipolar, cuz the moment you're manic, you fit the bill for bipolar type 1. Make sense? Most, but not all, people with type 1 also experience periods of extremely low energy/moods called a depressive episode. These lows are not required for a diagnosis, but they are very prevalent. They may last weeks to months. The main thing about type 1 bipolar is the manic episodes they experience that cause them significant distress in life.

Bipolar Type 2: Type 2 is diagnosed if someone experiences a hypomanic episode that lasts more than 4 days, AND a depressive episode (not at the same time, but within the same year). Hypomania is a mild form of typical mania. If someone experiences extreme mania, they will be diagnosed with type 1, never type 2. In type 2, its the depressive episodes that cause a person the most distress, while in type 1 its the mania. Depressive episodes are typically more severe and last longer in this type, and the hypomanic episodes are typically mild and short-lived enough for a person to not even notice theres a problem there. Both hypomanic and depressive episodes are required for this diagnosis.

Now you know the two different common presentations of bipolar, but you need to understand exactly what a bipolar episode looks like. The WORST thing you can do is to misinterpret them simply as mood swings. In reality, its more like a merry-go-round where youll drop and stay down for awhile, or youll go up and stay up for awhile, or youll just relax in the middle without any ups/downs for a bit.

Manic Episodes: Manic episodes are only prevalent in type 1 bipolar. A common misconception is that you can experience mania without bipolar disorder, but that isnt true. Mania is the hallmark feature of BD, so it isnt associated or experienced with any other disorder. It isnt a symptom, its a defining feature. But what are the symptoms of a manic episode? Remember that mania is very severe, and causes significant impairment in someones life, often the person ends up hospitalized. The common symptoms are a lack of sleep (~0-2 hours), very high moods/euphoria, racing thoughts, talking very fast and often not making sense to others, and taking dangerous risks/being impulsive/irresponsible without any sense of judgement or forethought. Mania presents differently in a lot of people, but generally its like very very high energy coursing through your mind and body to the point you feel like youre zooming or gonna explode, jittery. You might laugh a bunch at nothing, act very erratic, irritable, say shocking or distasteful things cuz you cant slow down enough to even think about what youre saying. You might ruin relationships, scare people, quit your job/get fired, get into trouble with the law, drain your bank account. Psychosis is also something people may experience with mania, such as delusions (grandeur ones commonly) and hallucinations. You might feel like you're completely untouchable, overly confident, like youre the king of the world. Its like everything is moving in hyperspeed, your body, your thoughts, your mouth, and its pretty overwhelming. Very commonly, a person in a manic episode doesn't realize they're in a manic episode. They might question it, but they brush it off as "its fine, I feel good" or "this is just how I am" or "Im not manic Im just in a good mood"

Hypomanic Episodes: Hypomania is like mania in the sense that the person experiences high energy/moods. The main difference is that hypomania is mild, and not severe enough to require hospitalization or immediate psychiatric treatment. Type 1 may experience hypomanic episodes as well as manic episodes, but this is not required for that diagnosis. In type 2, hypomanic episodes are required. In a hypomanic episode, someone might suddenly be very happy and social, they may get very productive in life, optimistic, and a bit eccentric. Due to the high energy, you don't feel as if you need as much sleep to function (~3-4 hours), and you might begin to talk a lot, overshare, ramble, go on nonsensical tangents. You might get more irritable and antsy. Risky and irresponsible behaviour is common too, such as impulsive decisions without regard for consequence, carelessly spending money, high sex drive/unsafe sex, etc. Cuz hypomania isnt as extreme as typical mania, most people dont even realize when they are hypomanic, its very often brushed off by being in a good, productive mood, or that a person is simply extroverted, or energetic. Bipolar people tend to have unhealthy relationships with both manic and/or hypomanic episodes, almost glamorizing the high moods they experience, especially during depressive episodes.

Depressive Episodes: Depressive episodes are a period of extremely low energy/moods. They typically last longer than mania, ranging from weeks to months. Sometimes a short period of depressive symptoms occurs right after a manic episode called a "crash", but this doesn't necessarily mean its a depressive episode. Bipolar depression is typically regarded as a bit different from typical depression, due to the nature of the disorder. The common symptoms are hopelessness, oversleeping, fatigue/tiredness, slow thinking, lack of concentration, irritability, feeling worthless/bleak, and a loss of passion/interest in things. Its like the other side of the same spectrum as mania, with similar changes such as appetite, sleep patterns, energy levels, irritability, etc, just in different ways. Depressive episodes can cause someone to socially isolate, or experience suicidal thoughts. You might feel more emotionally sensitive, or like nothing will ever get better. Its like suddenly a filter of hopelessness, negativity, and sadness gets put over your brain and eyes, and the world loses its colour, and everything sucks so bad all you wanna do is lay in bed and rot. It feels physically heavy, like youre dragging weights. When manic you might feel very fast and light, when depressive you might feel very slow and heavy.

Mixed Episodes: A lesser known episode that may be experienced is a mixed episode. Any type can experience this type of episode, but it is not required or considered for any diagnosis. Its sort of like something that happens instead of something thats a hallmark feature of bipolar. In a mixed episode, someone will experience both symptoms of depression and mania at the same time, or in rapid succession/back and forth in short bursts. This is typically regarded as the most distressing and severe episode to have because of the combination of both episodes. You might feel like your thoughts are racing, or like youre going crazy, but at the same time youre so tired you cant get out of bed. You might feel very very energized, but have thoughts that youre hopeless and worthless. You might laugh, and then start crying, like youre being shot up into space and then thrown into the bottom of the ocean. You might feel very jittery, but a pain in your chest, or an exhaustion you cant shake. You might also experience a burst of joy, laughter, very high energy where youre talking super fast and speaking nonsense and acting erratically, and then immediately you start to feel very sad and slowed down, like everything hurts, and is meaningless. Mixed episodes are very painful to deal with, because youre being constantly thrown around, and you cant get a grip. Rates of suicide are higher during these periods. Not everyone with bipolar may experience mixed episodes, and it will present differently for everyone. It may last a couple days to even weeks.

So theres a rundown for the different episodes. To write a bipolar character, think about the type of bipolar they have/how it presents, and then think about how their episodes may impact them contextually. If a character is manic at a certain point in your story, what actions may they take, or thoughts, or interactions, that will show this? Can the people around them tell when theyre in an episode? What gives it away? What behaviour cues show their episodes? For me personally, my fiancee can always tell when Im in an episode, cuz of my eyes/behaviour. She says my eyes get more wide and sorta erratic looking when Im manic and I move around very quickly like Im restless, and when Im depressive, my eyes get more heavy/tired looking and I move very slowly and less expressive. Remember that someones episodes, especially mania, will have an impact on the people/world around them, not just internally, it causes issues externally as well. Someone might cause a lot of destruction or drama or get into fights when theyre manic and impulsive, they might do crazy or ambitious shit just to drop it, they might socially isolate and sleep all day when depressed, or not show up to work or school.

Another thing to consider is the persons cycle. This is how many episodes a person experiences in a year. If they have proper treatment, they may experience ~0-2 episodes a year, if not, they may experience ~1+ a year, typically in the 2-4 range. This means that someone who is treated with the proper medication may not experience any episodes at all, or they might experience milder, shorter lived episodes a couple times a year. Someone who isnt treated is very susceptible to experiencing more extreme and lengthy episodes, and more often in a year.

Rapid Cycling is when someone with bipolar experiences one episode after another. So they might be manic for a week or so, and then immediately experience a depressive episode right after for like a month, and then back to being manic. Typically, someone with bipolar will experience plenty of time in a year in between their episodes without any significant manic/depressive symptoms, like periods of stability.

Triggers for a bipolar episode are usually lack of sleep, stress, alcohol/drug use, and even changes of seasons or life events can trigger a high/low in someone. Everyone has their own unique triggers that is important to recognize when it comes to treatment and preventing episodes. Think about the triggers your character might have, and what they might be exposed to in your story that could cause this. Episodes may come on as a gradual up/down climb, or very suddenly.

Thats really all I got for information on bipolar. The biggest issue I see is just the way people write bipolar episodes as mood swings. It's not being happy and then suddenly really angry or sad, its not changing your mind really quick, or suddenly switching up. Its moreso long periods of high/low energy. Thats why I say "episodes" instead of "mood swings", cuz its not a mood swing at all, its very literally just random periods where you'll experience an episode of mania or depression. The classic "mood swings"/switching up thing is more closely related to borderline personality disorder which is VERY different from bipolar, despite them being mixed up so often.

This was very long but feel free to send in more asks if you need any specifics. I just tried to cover all bases cuz its good to know what youre working with before you work with it.

#tombtalk #creepypasta #creepypasta fandom #bipolar disorder #writing #creepypasta headcanon

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