#he does seem very tired in both his last lives tho i hope he can go home and sleep for a week

[faunandfloraas]

from Seungmin's live, 130524.

[quirkle2]

HELLO ermm i love ur zombie au and i have a few questions about it i came up with while scrolling thru the tag if thats fine !!!!

ritsu and mob arent quite the same after being cured and all, but what about teru and reigen and tome?

By the moment mob gets cured, is the apocalypse also coming to an end?

how did teru and reigens adventure while searching for the kagebrothers go?

how did reigen and teru react to meeting tome?

why were the kagebros and teru with reigen? where are the kageyamas' parents?

HOPE THESE ARENT TOO MUCH I LOVE TJIS AU BYE

hello!! im glad ur likin it so far :]

this is a lotta questions (which, dw, i am stoked about) so this gets kinda long. tome backstory inside of a mini tangent tho so<3

(i talk abt the typical zombie au stuff but Also there's child and parental death here so be careful)

all of them are affected pretty greatly by this—it's an apocalypse after all. reigen is probably a bit hyper vigilant about keeping the kids in his sights, since last time he failed to do that, they got separated for like 2 years, mob got turned into a zombie, and ritsu gained trauma <3 he became quite protective over teru as time went on, since the kid was rly all he had left. it's actually a point of minor tension between him n teru; that is, teru being tired of his constant worry. reigen generally does a pretty good job at hiding those worries, but as time goes on that ability to mask it slips from his hold

he makes a strict rule that if they're going somewhere, they are using the buddy system and reigen Needs to know exactly where they're going. you can imagine a group of teenagers that want privacy have a bit of an issue w this sometimes, but they mostly understand

teru is very lucky to stick w his adoptive father for the whole journey (he'd.already adopted teru by the time the apocalypse rolled around) and he's very aware of that. he's no doubt run into plenty of dangerous situations with a plan that he does not bother to inform reigen abt, and therefore has given reigen approximately 16571651 heart attacks, and most likely has traumatized himself as well. teru is generally better at keeping a good mindset in situations like this, but it does indeed get to him sometimes. he's still just a kid, and it all feels kinda hopeless to him, bc even if they Do find ritsu n mob, what then? even living in a settlement doesn't guarantee your survival

teru seems to stick closer to people after everything—he hates being alone and gets kinda scared when left to his own devices. he likes hearing people talk around him; prolly a product of reigen constantly talking to him during the journey to keep their minds off of the Horrors. he cannot deal with silence

^ i WISH i had more to say about reigen n teru as a whole but unfortunately the main gang gets all of my attention and brain power . whyam i like this

tome is pretty hardy, and even though she lost her original family and ended up walking away from her adoptive one at the settlement, she rarely lets people know that gets to her other than a convo or two here and there with ritsu. she Is a little paranoid after everything, and it's a bit of a mix between her own paranoia and trauma getting to her along with ritsu's contagious vigilance. they both look over their shoulders for threats and sleep with their weapons—when tome joined ritsu n mob, she was targeted as well, so she's adopted some of those prey instincts

sorry if i go on a tome tangent here, but a theme w tome throughout this is that she never quite fits in anywhere. she never feels like she's somewhere she was Meant to be, and she's just kinda wandering from group to group searching for something that can replace the hole her original family's deaths left

i don't have a set-in-stone scene in my head for how it happens, but i've always imagined tome has a sister, either older or younger. in this au she's younger, and she unfortunately becomes a zombie. whether it was tome's fault or not, she Believes it is, and she did what everybody had told her to do—tome "mercy" killed her sister.

the Reason she joins ritsu n mob is because she sees a way for her to "redeem" herself—ritsu didn't go through with that choice. ritsu chose to spare mob, and take care of him, no matter How hard it got, and she feels like if she helps out w this, and aids in keeping somebody's beloved sibling safe, then she's still a good person. she doesn't rly do it for Him, Or his brother. she does it for herself (and sometimes she wonders if she's even More horrible for that)

she finds a purpose through ritsu and mob, but i wouldn't say she fully feels at home there. to delve into another question a lil bit, reigen n teru reacted well to tome, and reigen and her got along just like they do in canon. she becomes good friends w them, but there's times when she feels like the odd one out—because she is. she's the new person trying to meld into this group that already has a history and strong bonds, and even if she gets along w them well enough, she doesn't rly,,, sink right into it like it was made for her, yaknow?

she feels a little distant from everybody when mob is cured, too, bc their History is shining through and they're laughing and crying and hugging him and tome doesn't rly know how to intervene, or if she should, so she kinda hangs back and lets them have their moments of victory. and she quietly wonders if this "redeemed" her or not. she doesn't know. she doesn't feel like it did.

ANYWAY SORRY tome tangent over. is everybody still here [empty auditorium] excellent

to answer ur question about the apocalypse ending, no not rly ! it's certainly Slowing Down now that a solid cure has been created, and it will continue to do so for years, but i think it'll be ? a long while before zombies are a thing of the past for them. society was Wrecked by this shit so the kids will feel the effects of this well into their adult years

teru and reigen's adventures were generally ????a lot safer than ritsu's, since they were able to stay at settlements regularly, but they still ran into some trouble. the most fun parts about it to me are when they come across areas where ritsu n mob have been before

at some point they arrive at the settlement were tome was from ! and like clockwork, they Always ask—has anybody seen two kids, both with black hair, about yay high? one's got a bowl cut, the other spiky? names are ritsu n shigeo kageyama and they Finally get that spark of recognition in somebody's eyes. they ask the Head Guy of the settlement this and he goes "oh wow yes i Have seen ritsu, u must be the family he was lookin for! he was brought in here just a month ago... he was very sick,,he seemed better when he left with tome but i woulda liked him to stay a little longer, he still looked pale. no sign of that other kid tho... he did mention a brother" and they. ooookay. 1) ritsu was alive at least a month ago .holyshit.this is the closest to proof we've ever gotten, 2) the fact that ritsu was "very" sick has them concerned tho, and 3) He Wasn't With Mob ? uhm.

i rly am so sorry; reigen and teru tend to get the backburner spot in this au so i don't spend nearly as much time and energy fleshing out their story bits. they feel so shallow rn..,, ill hopefully fix that soon

aaaaand ritsu and mob were with reigen n teru bc their parents died. the only "good" detail abt this is that they didn't have to go through becoming zombies. ritsu was sleeping over at a friend's house when the worldwide panic set in, and the kageyama parents and mob were on their way to pick him up when they got into a crash in the crazy state of the roads. mob obviously survived w some wounds, but their parents weren't that lucky. teru and reigen were in the process of fleeing the city as well when they found him by the crash site by chance, and they picked up ritsu afterward in their mad dash to run. mob was the one to tell ritsu their parents just died—you can imagine how well that went

[hermannsthumb]

you should totally do something with ksci janitor’s vamp newt it’s so just so good

i sure will! in a vampire mood this weekend. @k-sci-janitor's vampire newt found here. warnings for quick mention of drinking, allusions to sexy stuff, and also the different kind of drinking you'd expect from a vampire fic (tho on the vague side)

-------------------

The circumstances that led Newt down the unwitting path of immortality and general un-dead-ness are, in hindsight, honestly kind of embarrassing. It'd be one thing if he could say it happened in the pursuit of, like, knowledge, like the fierce jellyfish sting scar on his wrist leftover from a research expedition when he was twenty-two or the equally fierce one on his knee received in response to his question (at the age of five) of what would happen if I jumped out of this very tall tree?, or even something unrelated to his extensive biology career, something impressive, y'know, Van Helsing style, something like tracking down some vampire king and barely escaping with his life (un-life?)—not what really happened, which was little more than a bad date. And not even the worst date that Newt's been on, if you can believe it.

Newt was young and stupid then. He still is young and stupid, technically, though the former by appearance only. (Eternally pushing thirty. If he could've picked, he would've done twenty-eight, just before his handful of grey hairs started cropping up. Newt's had almost forty-five years of staring in the mirror at those four fucking grey hairs. He gave up dyeing them around the nineties. Not worth it. Still annoying.) He liked to do what young and stupid people did, like get stupid tattoos, and have a stupid haircut, and get drunk at stupid punk shows and not stumble home until he'd had at least one regrettable hook-up with a stranger and maybe lost his wallet. (The two were often related.) That particular thing was what did him in that night. It was a different time back then, man—if a dude showed even the slightest inkling that he ran in Newt's sort of circle, if you caught his drift, Newt fucking jumped at the chance.

(The band was on their second set of the evening and Newt had already screamed himself hoarse with singing along. He'd ducked outside in a back alleyway for only a second to get some fresh air, the club suddenly too hot and smokey for him to handle, and was just about to go back inside and close out his tab for the night when he realized he wasn't alone. There was someone—he was sure—lurking in the shadows a few feet away. He could hear breathing. He could see—eyes, maybe, in the dim neon light of the bar sign overhead. "Hello?" he'd called.

"Have a light?" the person called back.

They emerged from the shadows, and Newt felt himself relax at once. It was some spooky-looking guy he remembered seeing in the club, leather jacket, boots heavier than Newt's, dark hair and eyeliner. Tall. Newt remembered him, firstly, because he thought he was hot, and secondly, because he swore he caught the guy staring at him at least three times, and to Newt, that was as good as any pick-up line. He was wagging an unlit cigarette at Newt now. He was taller than Newt thought he was back in the bar—much taller, at least a full head on Newt. His eyes were a golden-brown, almost yellow, like a cat's, and Newt found himself unable to tear his own away from them. "L—light?" Newt echoed.

The guy stuck the cigarette in his mouth and arched a perfect eyebrow. Newt didn't smoke, but he did keep a lighter on him for occasions like this. He fumbled through his pockets for it while the guy stepped closer. "I was watching you," he told Newt, while Newt raised the lighter to the cigarette, "in there."

The flame danced and glinted against his eyes. Newt swallowed. "Uh-huh?" he said.

He flicked the lighter shut, leaving them both bathed in nothing but pink neon. A hand slid up against the wall next to Newt's right shoulder. Another plucked at the left lapel of his jacket. Newt was still staring at those eyes. "What's your name?" the guy said, in a puff of cigarette smoke.

"Um." Newt's leather jacket was being pushed off his shoulders. He felt his long hair being tucked to the side of his neck. All at once something seemed in snap in Newt—some reminder of where he was, and what he came here hoping for in the first place. Some hot dude was eyeing Newt up all night long, and now he was actually coming onto Newt, and Newt was about to get laid. He grinned. "Newt," he said. "Just call me that. You were watching me, huh?"

"All night," the guy said.

Newt's jacket hit the ground with a soft thump. A knee was being pushed between his. Newt felt his cheeks heat up a little—he wasn't used to people being this forward with him, and especially not in a semi-public place like this. Usually they at least made a show of offering up their apartment first. "What, um, what for?" he said.

They were kissing. Newt was clinging to the back of his jacket. And then he was kissing Newt's neck, and then he was—

"That kinda hurts," Newt mumbled. "Um, dude, I think your—your fuckin', tongue piercing cut me, or something. It's—"

It was hard to keep his eyes open. His neck felt weird. The guy was into biting, apparently, biting really hard, and yikes, that was going to leave a super embarrassing hickey that Newt would have to explain to his students somehow on Monday, but it also felt really good, like, Newt was maybe getting off kinda good, and Newt thought, dizzily, that he should at least return the favor before he finished up and collapsed in a happy heap on the ground. So he did.

The guy pulled back with a hiss. "Ow. What—?"

Newt tasted something coppery in his mouth, and he panicked and swallowed on instinct. "Oh, shit, dude, I'm sorry," he slurred. His voice sounded like it was a million miles away. "I was trying to be—sexy. Um." There was blood on the guy's chin. He was staring at Newt in something akin to horror. Dark circles were spotting Newt's vision. "I think you cut your lip," he said, and then he passed out.

Newt was alone when he woke up. It was still dark, too. He walked the two miles home, collapsing in bed, fully-clothed, just before dawn, and he didn't wake up again until sunset. He forgot his jacket, but at least he remembered his wallet this time.)

So, anyway, Newt thinks he can be forgiven if he...embellishes stuff a little when, for the first time in his whole long life, he finally spills the details to someone. Also, no way is he admitting the truth to Hermann of all people.

"There were a bunch of murders in the area at the time," he says, while Hermann, angled on his side next to him in bed, watches him raptly. It's kind of weird pillow talk, but their pillow talk rarely isn't weird. Usually Hermann will launch into a critique of Newt's latest pet theory before Newt's even caught his breath. At least he very courteously waited for Newt get a glass of water from the bathroom first this time. "Really brutal ones. Like, throats torn out, blood drained. Really nasty shit. Everyone was saying they were some kinda bizarre wolf pack attacks, but I knew better."

"Of course you did," Hermann says, running his hand down Newt's chest, and Newt can't tell if he's being sarcastic or not. (He has a feeling he is.)

"You bet," Newt says. "It took me months of, um, super hard research. Finally I hunted him down to this—" Newt debates the coolest lair possible of a vampire, and then remembers Lost Boys, which, even though he resents it slightly for totally stealing the vampire vibes he was going for, is still a kick-ass movie. "—this weird cave, where he lived. The king of the vampires. I won, obviously, but he fought back, and he managed to infect me just before I hammered the, um, the wooden stake into his heart."

"So courageous," Hermann says. He reaches up and tucks a piece of Newt's long hair back. Hermann being totally cool with the whole vampire thing, and maybe even possibly into the whole vampire thing, is probably the last thing in the world Newt expected from him. They're no strangers to hooking up during long late nights of science, but Newt swears it's gotten more frequent. "You must've been terrified."

"Nah," Newt says, though he remembers the glint of the flame off those yellow eyes, and he shivers. Hermann notices; his eyes, not yellow, but a warm shade of brown that makes Newt feel like he's being wrapped in a blanket, soften. If Newt could still blush, he would. "I'm—um—I'm pretty brave."

Newt hadn't exactly been planning on telling Hermann about the whole thing, but (last week) he had the very unfortunate timing of beginning a late-night dinner just as an oblivious Hermann strolled back into the lab to pick up his forgotten pair of glasses. To his credit, he only freaked out a little when he saw Newt draining a blood bag like a fucking Capri-Sun, and even then (after what felt like ten years of horrible, horrible silence) all he said was "You're the one who's been stealing those from medical?"

Look. Newt hasn't drank from a human being the entirety of his un-life, and he doesn't plan on it any time soon. He's...a vegetarian. Effectively. It's sort of the reason he picked up a medical degree along the way once he got tired of breaking into blood banks. Even if it's still a little ethically dubious to steal blood like that, at least he's not swooping around on unsuspecting people like that—goth asshole who swooped in on him did. (Newt's never managed to find out who he was—he suspects he was some sort of vampire drifter in town that night just to find a victim. And Newt just had to think with his dick at the worst possible time.)

Hermann tucks another strand of Newt's hair back. Newt also did not expect how fast Hermann became cool with the whole thing, but on the other hand, giant aliens are clawing their way out of the ocean on a bi-monthly basis these days. It's hard to be skeptical about most things. ("Well, it does make logical sense," Hermann had said with an eyeroll. "When you consider some of your rather more bizarre quirks, I mean. I ought to have guessed it ages ago. I suppose that's why you have that awful haircut," and that stung, because yeah, Newt hasn't felt like changing it up since the seventies, and why should he, it kinda rules? but he just laughed it off and said, "You're one to fucking talk, dude!") "Newton," Hermann says now, gently, "what actually happened?"

Newt sighs. Hermann always knows when he's lying about shit. "I was making out with a vampire in an alleyway and then he bit me. And—um—I kinda didn't notice at first, 'cause it felt... good."

"Mm," Hermann says. The corner of his mouth twitches up. "That's more along the lines of what I expected. That, or you were hounding him for details like a proper biologist and he got tired of answering your inane questions."

"Very funny," Newt says. "Ha."

Hermann rolls away from him and stretches his arms above his head. Newt watches his throat work as he yawns, swallowing down a sudden lump in his own, and he feels a surge of something hot and—alien—in the pit of his stomach. "Over forty years," Hermann says. He picks up Newt's discarded sweatshirt from the floor and tugs it down over his head. "You must get terrifically lonely."

Newt half-shrugs. "I guess. I'm kinda used to it by now." His dad (who never brought up how Newt's aging seemed to be at a standstill when they saw each other, not once) is long-gone. Newt's tried dating, but no one's ever seemed to be into it as much as he is—and besides, it's not like he could ever do the actual til death do us part thing unless he went against every ethical bone in his body and made someone like him. When the internet became a thing, he considered making a forum or something to find more of his kind, but the thought everyone just being like the guy who accidentally turned him in the first place terrified him and he killed the page before it even left infancy. So, without any better ideas, Newt forged some paperwork and leaned pretty hard into the world of academia to fill up his sad little hole of a heart, resigned himself to casual flings with anyone who seemed interested, and it mostly worked. Mostly. And then the kaiju came along, and then so did... "You make it a little bit better," he confesses.

Hermann lays back down next to him. "I do?" he says.

Newt thinks he sees something like that hot, hungry feeling he felt in his stomach flash behind Hermann's eyes. He nods.

Hermann suddenly kisses Newt, pulling him down on top of him, and then tugs the collar of Newt's stolen sweatshirt down below his collarbone. He drags Newt's hand up to press against his throat. Newt feels the erratic beat of Hermann's pulse beneath his fingertips, his heart pounding against his ribcage (pressed up against Newt's silent one), and he almost moans. "Have you ever...?" Hermann murmurs, gazing up at Newt through his dark eyelashes.

"N—never," Newt stammers. "I told you."

"Do you want to?" Hermann says. Newt tries not to gape. "Just a bit at a time, whenever you need. You wouldn't have to steal those silly blood bags anymore. And—" He hesitates. "I admit I am curious. About the sensation."

"Um," Newt says. "I—"

He feels something sharp poking his lower lip. Fangs. His fangs. Oh, shit, he's never had that happen before. He forces himself off of Hermann before he does something stupid.

"Maybe, um, maybe later?" he squeaks, while Hermann just smiles at him.

[yaomomvs]

Hellow! Love your drabbles 😳 I saw your reqs were open for Shouto-kun: so can I ask a Drabble in which the reader is crushing on Shoto but feels completely unworthy of him, notably because she's from a very lower condition, something people often remind her while telling how Momo and him would make the perfect couple, because they're both from higher condition.. While reader is admittedly a hard-working person but has always been bullied for her modest origins? If you feel inspired ;o thanks :3

if i was a rich girl, yeah gwen stefani said that too

pairing: shoto todoroki x reader

little bit of angst? fluff!

warnings: self issues?? curse words??? not a warning but bakugou is reader’s best friend. also memories are in italics

plot: you couldn’t help comparing yourself to yaomomo, and clearly, your classmates comments didn’t help at all

notes: aaaa tysm i can’t believe this is my first request hopefully i did justice you your amazing idea! sorry for the delay i was in my last week b4 holiday vacation, hope you enjoy!

“i’m just sayin, todoroki and momo would definitely would look as an amazing couple wouldn’t they?”

it was kaminari’s words that were the final drop that broke the glass.

no, don’t misunderstand the situation, yaoyorozu was one of the sweetest, loveliest and most intelligent girls you’ve ever met.

but also one of the richest.

see, the thing is that you were not born in a “i have it all” family type of environment. you lived well, yes. but it’s for sure that your family did struggle way too many times in their way of spending money.

that’s why when you got into UA tears couldn’t stop falling through your face, you were finally able to do something about that. you always wanted to become the greatest hero, you thought that being able to rescue people from danger was the most selfless thing to do, you were familiar with that, so ever since you were little that was your goal. and besides that, you wanted to help you family so they wouldn’t have to worry about it anymore.

also because of that your friendship with uraraka was a great one. you understood what was like to face little things that the others didn’t, and you suddenly became close that you almost considered her a sister.

she was the most important friend to you, well, along with other person.

your eyes started itching, currently at the common room table where you and your friends were having dinner.

kaminari was on the sofa among with bakugou and mina, but it was easy to hear them. so that comment took everyone’s attention, even shouto’s.

“i mean you are not wrong” asido agreed, excited they finally were talking about romance in that boring school. “can you imagine how rich the todomomo’s family would be?”

“todomomo?” todoroki asked visibly confused.

“a ship name! for you and yaoyorozu!” she answered

your eyes were a little bit red now, and the knot on your throat was growing more everytime you looked over to see shouto’s expression.

uraraka noticed this, so she gently placed her hand over yours. how could she handle the situation?

“she’s so fancy!” you overheared some girls in the cafeteria drooling over the way that momo seated.

“i can’t believe this is her whole house” jirou exclaimed cheerfully when you visited her to study form an exam.

“an intelligent girl is always a classy girl” you listened kirishima while he looked stunned the way yaoyorozu handled, not only professional but also gracefully, a mistaken order at the cafeteria.

you always admired the way she was because of her origin, not in a bad way but you were obviously impressed, and if you were honest with yourself, sometimes it made you feel small.

but until now you never thought about this new insecurity, one that came up with the fact that todoroki and momo would actually look great together.

you tried to take those thoughts away, but your dear classmates were not helping at all.

the rambling of momo being a super match to shouto was getting louder and louder every second to you.

“think about it!”

“so when is the first date happening uh todoroki” kaminari still teased.

“but” midoriya interrupted “you know uhm wouldn’t it matter the way todoroki-kun actually feels about momo”

you stared at him.

but you finally had it when you spotted a slight red tint on todoroki’s face.

he was blushing.

“uh..” todoroki’s face was absolutely fuzzy. what could he say?

“i have to go” you announced way more loud than you expected, with a broken voice only two people were able to decipher.

bakugou took over a glance to you, knowing well what was going to happen next, with a tired groan he yelled. “well done idiots”

you ran out of the common room and took the elevator to go you your room.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“be careful” a voice said over your shoulder while grabbing your back before you touched the ground.

you looked above just to find a pair of beautiful heterochromatic eyes. and also a half red and half white hair type of thing. you were embarrassed that being your first day at school you were already tripping with everything. but fortunately he catched you right before something disastrous happened.

“come on, on the first day? if you have something to tell me god do it right now!” you remembered saying yo the sky. “that was weird, i’m sorry, (l/n) (y/n), sorry for bothering you but thanks for saving me” you laughed.

“do you think god would take my complaints along with yours?” he asked serious, was that his way of making a joke? “todoroki shouto” you smiled.

-

“DON’T GIVE UP!” you remembered yelling from the bleachers at the sports festival “YOU OWE US!”

todorki heard you from above during his fight with bakugou. he saw you there, almost crying and although he did not understand why were you so invested on it, that gave him the extra strength to stand up to bakugou at least for a little more minutes.

-

“did you know that seahorses once they find their mate they keep it for life?” you randomly said one day while eating lunch with him. currently doing some extra work so you could be ar least on top 10 of your class “how romantic is that, right todoroki-kun?”

he glanced at you, confused but still admiring. you knew so many things that it was actually impressive to him. he didn’t know why but that day, his heart skipped a bit.

-

if i was a rich girl, na na na na na na na na na na na, see i’d have all the money in the world if i was a wealthy girl.

“if i was a rich girl”, yeah gwen stefani said that too you thought.

the song may seem stupid but your current mood made you put in on speaker.

if i was a rich girl i’d sure have a chance you thought too

“so i guess i do have a crush on him huh” you admitted to yourself.

“about time you made it, idiot” you heard bakugou say “was it hard playing dumb all this time? i mean it’s in your blood”

he was standing at your door arms crossed with that awfully big brother look on his face. you rolled your eyes.

“is it hard messing around being a dickhead? i mean it’s in your blood”

“well you shouldn’t be using that language in front of your lover boy” he said.

“what the fuck are you talking about-”

your body stopped working when he pulled out todoroki out of the wall letting him come out at sight.

the icyhot boy had his hands in his pockets giving that gorgeous look. you blushed, how could he do nothing and still look good?

“why are you feeling this way?” he abruptly asked.

“todoroki-kun?...”

“i’m not dumb, whenever she’s around you act so self conscious” he began “what’s worse is that i see you working so hard everyday but you are so blind that you don’t see what i see”

if anybody could hear the conversation, they would actually say that he was being rude, but you knew him he was just expressing his feelings, weird way tho.

“is it about the money? believe me, yaoyorozu is an incredible girl but you don’t have to compare yourself because how different she is to you in terms of money” your eyes were widened.

why was he talking so much all of a sudden?

“you don’t understand todo...”

“i know what it feels to mad, and seeing you this way it just does it to me over and over again. because everyone has their own opinion on perfect, but to me, you are that definition”

your heart froze at that last thing, his expression was so serious that if you weren’t listening carefully you would have thought that he was mad at you for any other reason. but that’s why you liked him so miches, deep down you understood shouto more than anyone else”

so you didn’t know any other answer that hug him in gratitude.

he was shocked, he never received some kind of display of pure love affection before.

but something in the way you did made him feel better. almost as if your hugs were some magical potion to the answer of everything he needed.

he felt so warm with you between his arms that he didn’t mind staying like this for a couple more minutes.

“wanna go out sometime?” your typical you started coming back again.

the confident and smart girl he learned to care about.

a soft smile crossed his face.

“anytime you want”

and so you thought, you did not have anything to worry about anymore.

[mythiccheroacademia]

Single-Parent!Headcanons

Characters: Kirishima Eijirou, Kaminari Denki, and Bakugo Katsuki

A/N: Inspired by y’all. Enjoy <3

Warnings: fluff overload? one tiny curse word

Kirishima Eijirou:

the day his son was born was both the worst and best day of his life

his wife died upon delivery and he almost fainted when he heard the news, bakugo caught him before he could hit the floor

it took him 24 hours before he could gather the courage to go to the nursery and see his baby. he thought he wouldn’t be able to stomach the reminder of losing the love of his life

but when he held the small boy, who instantly nuzzled into his father’s chest, sighing with relief, kirishima was hooked for life

he just continued to hold his son into his chest and cry until he couldn’t anymore

from that day on, he swore he’d be the best parent he could be for his wife and his child’s sake

bc kiri is such a youthful and loving person, taking care of his son was easy, fun, and rewarding

ofc there were hard days, but it was all worth it when his baby would wake up with an adorable laugh, smiling up at him like he was his entire world

they’re two peas in a pod

he and his son are just the cutest pair

he takes his son everywhere, strapping him on his chest with a baby carrier

you bet your ass he’s taken him on (a safe) patrol around the block

kirishima is the kind of dad that puts his kid in a laundry basket, sits them in front of the tv, and acts out rollercoaster sounds

he lives for that loud laugh of his son’s

blows raspberries into the kid’s stomach whenever he starts getting cranky

his son’s first word was “manly” and kirishima spent the entire day bothering the bakusquad about it

everyone has 12 different copies of the video—y’know...just in case

when he takes his first steps, kiri’s swinging him around the house and giving him so many kisses on his chubby cheeks

when he saw his son had one spiky tooth growing in, he almost drowned from the cuteness

the kid gets himself into a lot of trouble tho. he’s always crawling towards the edge of something and putting his hand in things that could totally cut it off. kiri has a heart attack at least once a week

calls him, “son” “bud” and “buddy”

I hc that even though he’s lively around his dad, his son is very shy with new people and in new environments so school is kind of tough for him

but kirishima is always understanding of his troubles and tries his best to let him know that as long as he’s his son, he’ll always be his biggest supporter

if that doesn’t work, they go buy their fav meats and have a random bbq (kirishima just looks like the bbq dad™️ lmao). that always seems to do the trick

when his son enrolls in U.A., he’s there with a banner, his fav meat, and a bunch of tears when he sends him off

his son wears their matching crocs only to cheer up his dad. nothing else

aka he lowkey likes them but you didn’t hear that from me!

kirishima always has the urge to ft his kid, like, every hour. but he won’t bc he knows he’s busy training to be a hero

but he does send him uplifting snapchat videos from time to time

his son still wonders how in the world his dad even knows about snapchat

he makes sure nobody knows about this

when his son calls him about his insecurities, comparing himself to his classmates, kirishima is right there to lift him up. he also dealed with those same issues and tells his son that even on his worst days, he’s strong for just facing the day and he needs to believe in himself before others can believe in him

the next day, the bakusquad is watching the tournament together

kirishima has manly tears in his eyes as his little boy places second place in the sports festival

bakugo is threatening to kill him if he ruins his shirt

Kaminari Denki:

denki becomes a dad from adopting a pair of four year old twins (one boy, one girl) that were left homeless and without parents after a villain attack

he kinda knew the parents from hero work and felt it was an obligation to at least make sure their children were okay

he wasn’t planning on necessarily adopting them. he was young and inexperienced with children. how could someone like him raise a kid when he could barely raise himself?

but after two visits to the orphanage and seeing how miserable they looked, he couldn’t leave the building without signing the papers

the transition was awkward. the twins were not only traumatized, but distrusting and scared. they didn’t really know kaminari and now he was suddenly their adoptive parent

kaminari tried everything from ice cream, to late night movie snacks, to hide n seek to get them to relax but it wouldn’t work

he almost gave up hope, and thought maybe it was a better idea to take them back to the orphanage. but that was before the night he woke up to them crawling into his bed, scared from the thunder storm that rumbled on outside

kaminari froze, scared that he’d frighten them away with any sudden movement, but he soon relaxed and hugged them close to his chest when they snuggled into his sides. he sleeps with a peaceful mind that night

although, he’s awoken to them bawling their eyes out over the nightmares they had. he panics but takes comfort in how they still grip to his shirt, face in his chest, seeking his comfort

therapy becomes a regular thing after that

kaminari finds more focus in his life

and as those helpful sessions go on, kaminari finds the twins beginning to open up more and more

they all sleep together now bc cuddle piles always scare the bad dreams away

the boy starts asking for kaminari to help him pick out his outfits

and the girl starts asking him about his quirk

it’s small things like that that lead up to things like this:

they’re in the midst of playing tickle monster when they scream with laughter, “stop! stop, daddy, you caught us!”

the twins stare at him in confusion (and slight worry) when he scoops them up and cries like he broke his leg or something

they got two huge scoops of ice cream that night so they don’t question it

dad jokes are a must

he wears typical dad outfits like hawaiian shirts, cargo shorts, and flip flops

he calls them his “little rockstars” and yes, it’s still embarrassing

kaminari is a playful dad who doesn’t really take things too seriously

his children are always laughing at his dumb jokes and are never afraid to talk to him about anything that crosses their minds

although, they won’t talk to him about love interests bc he likes to play match maker

the last time his daughter told him about some girl she was crushing on, she found out she left her a personally signed chargebolt poster for the girl in her name

kaminari called it a little boost in spirit

her brother found it funny

she was horrified

kaminari swears up and down he’s the cool dad. his kids think otherwise, but their friends LOVE how much of a jokester he is. and he lets them stay up at sleepovers

plus, he’s literally chargebolt

how could they not love him?

denki has a little trouble being serious when he needs to be, but he has good kids so it’s not that much of a problem

there was that one time his son tried to help him during a villain attack. even though kaminari ordered him to get to safety, he didn’t and ended up getting hurt

the twins had never seen their father so angry. it was kind of scary. however, in the next moment, he gathered them up in a big hug and made them swear not to scare him like that again

overall, kaminari is the sweet, fun loving, dad that everyone wishes they had

Bakugo Katsuki:

katsuki became a father the day he found a baby and a note at his doorstep

the note read: “surprise! you’re a dad. i gave you all the legal rights, but you can place her up for adoption if you want.”

least to say, bakugo was pissed

he was even more pissed at himself for getting someone so cold and unloving pregnant

however, he decides to put the baby up for adoption. he cant take care of a baby! he’s at the height of his career. he can basically taste the number one hero spot on his tongue

he’s dead set w the decision, but as he stands outside of the orphanage, he freezes. he just can’t move

bakugo looks down at his daughter as she opens her eyes for the first time. he sees an identical pair of red eyes that make his chest tight with a feeling he hasn’t experienced in a long time

he turns back around and heads back home. it’s easily the best decision he’s ever made in his life

ngl though, growing into the dad role for bakugo was tough

before the girl, he only ever had to think of himself. he was still used to doing everything on his own time and for his own benefit. so being forced to put 100% of his attention to a small helpless human being was not easy

katsuki admits that the first couple of years weren’t his proudest. he was still short tempered, angry with the world, and frustrated bc he felt like his life was ruined

one time, the frustration and sleep deprivation would hit him all at once and he’d just start going off at the baby to just “shut the hell up!” before breaking down and crying with her

it was a dark moment for him, and yet, even after that, his little girl still curled up in his arms to rest when the tears tired her out

it had been a while since he felt unconditional love like that, and so he decided to change for the baby’s sake

you cant tell me that little girl isn’t spoiled rotten

bakugo is a hardass, but he’s all bark no bite. no matter what, he just can’t resist his little girl’s puppy dog eyes

he’s a girl dad to the t

yes he played the princess that needed saving from the big bad dragon. what about it?

his daughter is a firecracker. she started sassing him as soon as she could gargle

he pretends he hates it but his daughter is lowkey funny asl

they go at it when they fight. bakugo’s learned to be a little more patient, but he still has a bit of a temper and it doesn’t mix well when his mini-me has the same explosive anger

is the kind of dad that says sorry by asking her what she wants for dinner

they totally talk mess about other heroes together. he ignores the fact that she admires deku as long as she keeps it to herself

emotional talks are...awkward, but he forces himself through it

she finds it embarrassing (yet oddly endearing) that he got kicked out of a PTA club meeting for threatening to light up some mom for saying the art program didn’t matter

his daughter absolutely won’t talk to him about potential love interests unless she wants them coming up missing

bakugo won’t admit to watching baby videos of his daughter when he sends her off to U.A. and no, he didn’t cry, he got dust in his eye

doesn’t bother her too much, but jumps for his phone when he hears her ringtone

kirishima says he getting soft, but that’s just his little princess

[socheckitout-mikey]

This maybe kind of a dumb question, but say one of the greasers were to get married, what would everyone wear and how would everyone act?!

heya birdie! this isn’t a dumb question at all, but i had to really think about it. thanks for requesting it tho! my best friend @brideofcthulhu10 helped me with this one as i was stuck. so go show her some love, tho she writes for The Lost Boys! (: i hope you enjoy what i’ve written bc it’s a right mess! - mae

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

One of the Gang Getting Married Hc’s:

° Alrighty, let’s be real, it’s either Sodapop or Steve who’s getting married first.

° Just bc Johnny’s too afraid to speak to girls after the whole Sylvia ordeal. Though he’d be a likely candidate if he found someone real swell!

° Two-bit seems like another likely candidate, though, in my personal opinion, he doesn’t seem to be incredibly serious about Kathy or likely to be the type to be serious and settle down any time soon. He’s definitely the flirtatious type and doesn’t take relationships too seriously, which is just Two-bit: Though I don’t think he’s the type to flirt and mess around with other girls out of being malicious, he just seems to be the type to not adhere himself to things like Sodapop or Steve. But with the right person, he’s serious.

° Dally is definitely out of the question, particularly at the moment. I doubt he’s looking to be tied down by anyone any time soon and the thought probably freaks him out a little. Though, that’s just my own personal opinion. To me, he just doesn’t seem like the marrying type, especially not atm.

° Pony’s just too young and awkward. I view him as the baby still, no matter how old he’d be. I’m not even going into more detail lol.

° And poor old Darry! He’s so busy and tired, there’s no damn time for him to look into dating! Even though he’d be psyched to if he could. But he never thinks about that sorta stuff because Darry’s a busy, grouchy man; and rightly so!

° I believe that Steve would be one of the first to marry because of the fact that him and Evie seemed to be quite serious in the book from what I understood. They’ve got a relationship that’s clearly going strong, and it must’ve lasted for awhile since at one point he got arrested and she cried about it, staying faithful. She also seems to be someone that Soda and the other’s get along with.

° But for this piece, I’m choosing Sodapop! Now, I know y’all will be thinking that he’d have some major trust issues after Sandy, and you’re honestly not wrong. He would!

° However, I think that Soda deserves a lucky break and for something to go right for him for once! So, let’s say he’s met his soulmate and everything’s just gone all swell! He’s popped the question in the most thoughtful and romantic way possible, bc it’s our Soda we’re talkin’ about!

° He’s gonna be nervous asf and Steve’s the one to calm him down bc let’s face it, he’s his best man! The little pep talks that’ll happen before it oh my gosh!

° Soda and the other boys are pretty casual, and honestly, I’m leaning towards it just being a smaller wedding. Sodapop wants people that you both love there: Nothing to spoil the event, and quite frankly, it goes perfect.

° The wedding probably occurs in a small local church if that’s what you guys have decided, but afterwards, you guys would probably have drinks and food back at the house, where everyone’s dressed a little more fancier than usual.

° Or the wedding is a small one in your backyard, but it’s still just as special.

° I note this just because they’re greasers and they don’t have much, but they know how to have fun and how to make this day special. It’s about the feeling, not about the material grandness of the day!

° At least that’s what you keep reassuring Soda with, because you can tell he feels a little guilty about not being able to give you what a Soc could. But that’s not why you’re marrying him, right? You’re marrying him because you both bring out the best in each other!

° Well, during the wedding, there was a lot of hollering and grinning from the boys, something that was making Soda blush up a storm!

° I mean, even Dally and Two-bit are taking it seriously. The pair dressed up as snazzy as they could, joking that they’re looking as fine as ever to take away the beautiful bride!

° Darry may or may not have had to hold Sodapop back from launching cake at them both.

° Ponyboy’s grinning from ear to ear! He’s geeking out so hard because he loves you to pieces and he’s never had a sister: So having you be more of a prominent figure in his life is going to make him really happy!

° Darry’s just so happy that there’s someone to calm Soda down and settle him out: Keep his head right on his shoulders. If that’s not the case, he’s happy that Soda’s got someone just as nuts as him! Though, he feels horrible for you because of all the experimentation that you’ll encounter within regards to food.

° Steve loves you big time! He’s gonna miss his best friend, but he’s happy that he’s marrying someone so understanding and amazing. You also get on very well with Evie which is a bonus!

° Johnny’s the first to get a dance with you after Soda, and he’s blushing the whole time. You’re probably the only girl that he talks to, but obviously not in that sense. He likes you so much because you’re always getting him candy and giving him a good cooked meal, a listening ear and comfort. He thinks you’re a really sweet girl and suit Soda.

° Dallas is happy for his buddy. Although married life isn’t too much his style, he’s happy to see Sodapop finally catch a break with someone who’ll treat him right. He constantly jokes that he’s gonna pick you up and it bugs Soda a lot but Dally’s only joking.

° Two-bit’s a people person, so he gels along with you quite well and makes you laugh so hard. You also make Two-bit laugh a lot. You’re both practically joined to the hip! Two-bit’s always flirting with you, but he flirts with just about anyone.

° Definitely the one who offered to elope to Mexico with you and got a curt smack to the back of his head by Darry!

° Alright, so the gang got you a really terrible fake gift for your married life which made you two end up laughing once they brought out the real thing. It was something practical and pretty expensive since they’d all pitched in to get you guys something good because you both deserve it. Soda cried like a baby!

° There’s a ton of dancing and it’s kinda cringe. The gang dancing together makes Ponyboy and Johnny want to crawl under the floorboards like; “OH MY GOD SODA STOP DANCING LIKE DAD!”

° Darry even dances and ya boii sweeps you off your feet and you’re kinda gobsmacked because who’s switched him out for the alien?!

° Idk what else to say really, they’re all just happy for you both! The gang won’t make anything dramatic, and any drama that does occur, it’s quick to be laughed over bc they’re all pretty laid back. They wouldn’t really let anyone else shit talk you guys.

° Besides, Two-bit’s there and able to diffuse any odd tension with a joke.

° It’s the best day/night of your lives.

° Y’all got so drunk oh my god.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* 　　 *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

please like, reblog and follow for more!

requests: open!

[catxsnow]

ELEVATOR MISHAP T.D.

Request: hi if requests are open i was wondering if i could request for tim 👉👈 maybe where the reader is his assistant/secretary at WE and is really smart and accomplished and everyone in the batfam who has met her think that she's perfect for tim in more ways than one. maybe one day the sexual tension gets too much and they end up making out or something like that but she pushes him away because she's older than him and she thinks he deserves better? you can choose how it ends!

Warning: sadly no elevator sex so it’s SFW, angst, yearning, language

A/N: CEO!Tim?? me?? writing it again?? couldn’t be. also that gif tho

Word Count: 2.8k

Mr. Drake was a very kind man.

Though he was young, he made sure to recognize the importance of everyone that worked under him. He learned the names of everyone he interacted with and always showed a smile when passing by. There was never a day that he wasn't kind to his employees, even when it was evident his day was hard.

Mr. Drake-Wayne, though he always pestered for you to call him Tim, was a young man. He was just barely at the age of eighteen. However, it seemed that he carried the weight of the world on his shoulders. Dark bags under his eyes every time you saw him, walking as if his joints were too old for his body.

As young as he was, he seemed older than you. Tim seemed to know a little bit too much about everything and he never faltered when something new was thrown at him. He wasn't just a smart man, he was prepared. You respected him for that. While many degraded him for his age, it seemed that he only earned more and more respect from you every day.

You were the secretary for Mr. Wayne shortly after he took over his father's position as CEO. From the start you had been right alongside him, watching him become accustomed to this new life at WE. You took his kindness as being a good boss, not as someone who thought about you in the late hours of the night.

Tim's crush on you - if you even wanted to call it a crush - was more than evident. His brothers saw it when they came to the office, most of your coworkers knew about it. You on the other hand, it seemed as if you were the only one who didn't know the full extent of his feelings. You picked up on the tension, the desire between the both of you.

He was too young for you. Sure, it was only a few years but it felt as if you were far too old for someone who was under constant scrutiny for their role in society. Tim didn't need another added stress of someone chastising him for liking someone older than him. You couldn't do that to him.

"Mr. Drake, you're late this morning," Tim held two coffees in his hands and a tired look on his face. His eyes lit up the second that he heard your voice. He stopped at your desk that was stationed just outside his own office. Tim slid one of the coffees towards you and kept the other for himself.

"That's no way to talk to your boss," Tim looked down at you. He was kidding, of course. "You know I don't like it when you call me Mr. Drake."

"Yeah, but, you always get a little flustered when I do," you beamed up at him. It was true, Tim always felt his cheeks get warm and a little stutter in his words when you called him that name. He seemed at a loss of words for a moment. You took the chance to change the subject, "you've got a meeting at two today."

"Will you be there?"

"If you want me to be."

Tim said nothing. He sent a wink your way and headed to his office. Typical response - never telling you yes or no and never sure what he really wanted. He was a man of many unanswered questions - ones that you'd hope to learn some day. It seemed unlikely.

You teetered between a professional and flirtatious relationship with Tim. It was easy to get lost in the conversation and forget that he was your boss and that you were in the middle of his office. Half the women in the building envied you and the other thought you to be mooching for more money that your job was worth.

No one had any reason to feel this way. There was nothing to envy and you certainly weren't getting any money added onto your paycheque every month. As desperately as you wanted to know more behind the wall Tim Drake put up, there was no such chance.

Less than an hour after Tim locked himself in his office, a familiar face stood in front of your desk. Tall, dark hair, romantic blue eyes that didn't quite hold the same adoration as Tim's.

"Mr. Grayson," You smiled up at him. "What do I owe the pleasure of seeing you today?" Dick sat on the empty edge of your desk. His arms were crossed over his chest and straining against his jacket. A friendly smile spread across his lips.

"Stopping by to see Tim," He vaguely answered. It wasn't uncommon for his family to come into the office, though none of them really spoke of what they were truly there for. "He was going on and on about you the other day about how this company wouldn't survive if he didn't have you to keep him in order."

You felt heat crawl up your neck at the thought of Tim talking about you to his family, talking good things about you. Sure you had to remind him every hour about what he had to do, but he would be just fine without you in the long run. Now, according to his oldest brother, he thought about you outside the office.

He sure as hell didn't make it any easier not to like him, not to think about him as well outside of your workspace. Tim consumed your thoughts at night. It was hard not to - the way his muscles rippled under his dress shirt when leaning against your desk or the smile he had when he knew that he was flirting a little too much with you.

Dick chuckled at how quickly flustered you got at his news. To be honest, he was mad at Tim for letting you stay single this whole time. It was obvious that you both had strong feelings for each other - and he thought that you would be great for Tim. He'd have to remember to smack some sense into his brother about it.

It wasn't just him who felt this way. Jason, who had only met you once, thought you to be a hot and Tim and idiot for not getting with you sooner. There were several threats made that if he didn't, Jason would. Dick had never seen his brother get so angry from a sly comment from Jason.

Damian, the one person it seemed impossible to get on the good side of, liked you too. He found your smile to be kind and genuine, and you didn't treat him like a kid like his father's old secretary did. The only reason that he wanted you and Tim to be together was because any other person Tim was interested in never treated him this way.

"Mr. Drake does just fine without me," you finally managed to stutter out. You took a sip of the coffee he had brought you, hoping to clear the scratch in your voice. Tim's favourite coffee shop - a clear sign that he had been the one to buy it for you. Dick knew his brother well enough that he was well wrapped around you finger.

"We both know that's a lie, (Y/N)."

><

"Join me for lunch?"

Tim stood in front of your computer, coat on and ready to face the cool Gotham air. His hair was tousled since the last time you saw him and you were sure that he was stressed out. He watched you peer up at him from your screen. It wasn't uncommon for him to ask you to join him for lunch. For the longest time you thought it was just because he didn't want to be alone, not because he wanted you.

"How can I say no to a smile like that?" you shrugged. Tim rolled his eyes and proceeded to grab your coat off the hook for you. He held it out, making it easy to just slip your arms in. He hooked his arm into his coat pocket, waiting for you to loop yours around him. The two of you walked side by side towards the elevator.

Tim looked over at you as the elevator door closed. A sly smile was on his face and you couldn't help but wonder what was going through his head in that moment. He turned to face you completely, causing you to drop your arm from him. You were taken aback to see him reach up to your face.

The tips of his fingers were rough against you skin. His hands were callused as if he had lived a life of labor three times over. Though it was shocking, his warmth was welcomed. He glided up along side your jaw, pausing for a moment as his palm cupped your cheek completely. Whatever had gotten over him in this moment had you frozen in shock.

Your flirtatious relationship had never been left to something like this. Tim was never forward about his desire for you - though it was there he never did anything about it. His conversation with Dick the other day left him unnerved. His brother was right - what if you had gotten whisked away from him before he even got the chance to do something about it.

He was scared to meet your gaze. His bold move suddenly feeling too much, too unexpected. There was no sign, no reason behind his sudden need to hold you. It left you bewildered, but needing more. Needing his burning hand to be on more of your bare skin and his lips on yours.

Tim felt himself succumbing to his desires. He felt himself leaning into you. Mostly, he felt himself needing to spill his heart out to you.

Instead, he heard the loud ding of the elevator and the treacherous sound of the doors opening. You peeled away from him before whoever was entering the elevator could see what was happening - what was about to happen. Tim's eyes fell in defeat, he sighed before putting on a fake smile for those who joined the two of you.

He sparked conversation with his employees, talking as if nothing had happened. You on the other hand, couldn't stop feeling the fire along your skin where he had touched you.

><

Tim's subtle touches became problematic.

He often pressed his hand into your waist if he was passing behind you or leading you through an known area with a reassuring hand at the small of your back. Catching you at the wrist if you weren't paying attention where you were going and stopping you from hitting something or someone. Arms brushing as you stood so close to one another.

He had always done those movements since the time you worked with him. His touches that always made you feel comforted, his touches that left you wanting more. Those same touches left a burning print on your skin and consumed your body for the rest of the day. You couldn't get him out of your mind, not after that almost kiss.

It was why you were avoiding him. Impossible to do with your job as his secretary, but you did your best. Tim shouldn't have this big of an affect on you - he was your boss he wasn't allowed to. At least, he wasn't supposed to.

A fat stack of files sat on your desk. They were supposed to be brought into Tim and yet they had remained there all morning. Of course at some point you would need to bring them to him - but the part of you still hoped that they would magically move themselves. After staring at the stack for another moment, you let out a sigh and picked them up.

The walk to his door seemed shorter than normal. It wasn't enough time to collect your thoughts or figure out what you wanted to say to him. Tim hadn't said anything since your moment alone together and as badly as you wanted to forget the whole thing, you were dying to know what the hell was going through his head.

You knocked once before hearing his voice. Tim was furiously typing at his computer, concentrated on whatever the hell he was doing. He stopped immediately upon looking at you, a faint smile gracing his face.  

"Papers, nothing to get excited about," You gestured to the pile in your hands. They were placed on the corner of his desk but before you could turn away and back to the safety of your own desk, his hand was placed over yours. Heat trailed up your skin from his touch, igniting your veins with a fire that you hated to welcome.

"You should know by now that I always get excited to see you." Of course you did. It was impossible not to see how evidently his face lit up around you, how he gained a small bounce to his step when he was at your side. The nervous tic of always pushing his already gelled hair from his face.

He gained a lot of habits because of you, and he was the only one that didn't seem to notice them. You retracted your hand suddenly, causing Tim to jolt at your movement. "I've got work to do, Mr. Drake."

You didn't. He knew that, you knew that. It wasn't hard for him to pick up on the idea that you were hesitant to be with him after that almost kiss. The only issue, was that he was unsure if it was you feared the feelings he had, or genuinely wasn't interested. He wouldn't know unless you admitted it.

You paused before turning back to the door. The question you so desperately wanted to ask right on the tip of your tongue, yet struggling to come out. Tim's eyes were glued on your fingers tapping along your arm. He could easily tell that you were in deep thought.

"Tim..." you finally spit out. No Mr. Drake. No Mr. Wayne. Just Tim. He met your eyes, hope running through him. "Never mind,  I'll see you in the meeting later this afternoon."

Tim jumped up from his desk. Before you could even take a step towards his door, he was blocking it from you. His chest heaved up and down with anticipation, with hope and desire.

A small, faint bruise laid against his jaw. Faint enough that you couldn't notice it unless you were as close as you were. Your fingers trailed along the mark without even noticing that you were doing it. Tim grabbed you hand, pressing it flat against his cheek. Your touch left an electric tail down his body.

"What were you going to ask me?" He whispered.

"The elevator..." You trailed off as his gaze flickered to your lips. Tim didn't need to hear anymore, he knew the rest of your question. He also knew words didn't seem sufficient enough to give you a real answer. He leaned into you, slow enough that if felt as if time itself had slowed.

Tim's lips brushed against yours. He was hesitant this time, worried that you would react badly. It wasn't until your hold on his cheek moved to the back of his neck and pulled him close. Weeks, months you had been dreaming of this moment. His lips just as soft as they always looked to be.

As wrong at this moment felt, you couldn't deny how it was too perfect. Tim's hands like fire against you, his lips molding to yours perfectly. His slow movements were only reeling you in for more, to be dragged into his hold forever. As badly as you wanted this forever, it couldn't. This couldn't.

He felt his breathing catching in his throat as you pulled away from him suddenly. His body cold without you flush against him. Defeat filled him.

"I'm sorry Mr. Drake," You stood my the door. A shake stayed in your hand as you reached for the door handle. Refusing to meet his eyes, the posture you held - it was easy for him to see that this wasn't embarrassment or regret, it was the wish for this to be an occurrence but feeling like you couldn't.

Tim had laid his cards on the table, he expressed how he felt for you, just like Dick suggested. He had done everything in his power to keep you close and it seemed that his acts only pushed you away further.

"I'm sorry, I have work to do."

[misterghostfrog]

39 FOR THE PROMPTS PLEASE AAAAA

LOOK OK, i’m going to start by saying this one... got away from me a little bit. And I didn’t originally mean to combine the prompts, and neither are technically correct. BUT consider you can’t stop me

39. Kissing tears from the other’s face.

30. Pulling away from a kiss, whispering words of love against each other’s lips.

Cw; This takes place after the unknowing but before Jon wakes up in canon, and Martin starts in a rough headspace. Also accidental compulsion.

(This is actually a sorta part-2 to the pre-unknowing ficlet I did! Tho u don’t gotta read it to understand it works as a standalone too. Anyway welcome to the AU ZONE)

EDIT: fixed a typo

Martin usually visits Jon on Thursday.

He used to visit every day. But the nurses began to give him looks after the first month, and it was hard to balance checking on Jon with regular life things like groceries, laundry, and work. So he’s cut back. If only to preserve his sanity.

He considered Sunday. But Sunday is the day he visits his mum, another thing that has been hard to balance with- well. Everything. Besides, it’s hard to stack that much heartbreak into one day.

The receptionist gives him a funny look. He would give himself a funny look too, he looks a wreck, he knows it. She knows him, so seeing him on a wednesday looking like he crawled out of the back end of hell. Or maybe just hasn’t done any laundry for a few days. Or showered. And got in a fight and lost.

He’s already waited too long though, he thinks. He... well. It’s his last chance, he supposes. If Jon isn’t coming back, then...

Yeah.

It’ll be for the best.

He turns the knob on the door, he knows what he’ll say. Even if he’s talking to a dead man he needs a speech apparently. And-

He bounces off of something- or someone. Who trips back a step in turn.

“Oh god- I’m so sorry-” He says almost automatically.

“No, don’t worry about it I wasn’t-”

“I wasn’t even looking where I was going a-and-”

“Really it’s fine-”

The man isn’t a nurse, Martin’s sees that much. He’s tall-ish. Handsome, certainly. Definitely no-one he’s ever met. And certainly no-one he thinks might have a reason to visit Jon. Not that Jon shouldn't get handsome visitors, but- well. He doesn’t- didn’t? Have many people outside of the institute he ever talked about. And so this guy turning up out of the blue is... well.

“Er- I’m sorry, but who... who are you?”  He’s not- he’s not upset. that this random stranger is visiting Jon. It’s just weird is all. Yeah. Really weird, actually.

“Oh! I- I’m- I’m a friend of Jons.” The man says with an awkward smile, his eyes darting down to his shoes for a moment as he says it. “Er- Antonio.” He tacks the name on like an afterthought. This time his gaze flicks somewhere around Martin's shoulder, he shuffles on his feet.

Martin’s never been an expert at picking up on lies, not to say he’s bad at it. He just doesn’t find it something to worry about generally. But it’s hard not to notice when ‘Antonio’ is basically holding an imaginary blinking neon sign that says ‘I AM LYING’ with accompanying metaphorical Morse code with the same message.

He swears he’s heard that name before though.

“Oh. Er- he’s never um, talked about you?” he says carefully.

“Oh, yeah. Very old friends. Haven’t um- talked in a while.” ‘Antonio’ waves a hand awkwardly. And casting consistent looks towards the elevator.

“Uh-huh.”

“Anyway! I’m uh- I’ll be going now. Visits over stuff to do y’know.” He’s already walking away as he says it, backing up for a moment and casting a quick wave before trotting away down the hall.

“Oh, y-yeah. Sure, bye?” Martin waves- though ‘Antonio’ isn’t looking. Watching as he basically runs down the hall.

“Bye!” ‘Antonio’ throws over his shoulder as he turns the corner to the elevators.

Well then.

“Huh.”

That’s not how he thought this visit was going to start.

He pauses for a moment. He’d been working off of something of a momentum. Check in with the nurse, make his speech. And be ready to say his goodbyes. But that... whatever just happened. Well, it threw him off.

He sighs.

It doesn’t matter. Weirdo visiting Jon. Seems about right, actually. If he thinks about it. Probably left a statement somewhere too, just to complete the weird weird picture.

The word ‘weird’ is starting to sound less like the a word the more he thinks about it.

He pushes the door to the hospital room open, he knows he’s imagining it. But the air feels heavier. The dread of the situation. The finality. Jon is still there, unmoving in his hospital bed. There's several machines tucked into the corner, they’d unhooked him from everything after the first month when it became clear that this is simply his state of being. That’s also about the time the nurses started telling him Jon probably wasn’t waking up.

He’s not going to wake up. Martin knows he’s not going to wake up. He’s been fooling himself for so long but now with the flesh attack he needs to do something. Or at the very least stop feeling like he’s doing nothing. But being miserable isn’t a solution either. 

Maybe there is no solution. Maybe it’s just, problems. Stuff he can’t fix or deal with and just- has to let it follow him until he dies.

He shifts, and his ankle twinges.

He’d tripped. It’s so stupid, it wasn’t even the monsters. He’d just- fallen and ended up hiding in a side room while everyone else dealt with meaty things crawling out of the floorboards. Just sat and hid and did nothing.

He’s tired of doing nothing.

Jon snores, interrupting his train of thought.

Martin smiles, god he’d forgotten Jon did that. Those little snorting snores- he’d only heard them a few times, back at the institute. It had scared the hell out of him the first time he’d been living-

Wait.

What?

Martin blinks. And watches as Jon scrunches his nose, making a small irritated noise- and turns over.

What.

His head skips, rewinds. Plays what he just saw back. Jon is breathing, how long has he been breathing? Doesn’t matter, he’s breathing which means he’s alive but what-

That weird guy. “Antonio”

He’s gone, Martin knows he’s gone. But he checks anyway. Even running all the way to the elevators. But he’s gone.

And Jon...

Jon is alive.

The thought hits his brain, and then slips away like a wet fish. There’s no guarantees. This could be a fluke, this could be a trap. It might not even be Jon. Just... something that looks like him, and snores like him. And-

A nurse taps him on the shoulder. And he realizes he’s been staring at the elevators for, well, he doesn’t know how long. Long enough to catch several concerned glances from passers-by though.

“Are you alright sir?” She asks, politely. He recognizes her, he chatted with her once when visiting Jon. She’s nice. She does the check ups a lot of the time, one of the few who’ll actually do it.

“He’s alive.” He says flatly, instead of answering. Because he’s not sure what the answer to the question is anyway.

The doctors do tests, though not many. According to them he’s fine. Fit as a fiddle aside from some fatigue and a little confusion. Which clearly makes them uncomfortable. Which he understands. A man wakes up from a three-month coma like he’d just rolled out of bed on a Monday morning? It makes him uncomfortable too, he thinks.

Basira drops off a statement. ‘Just felt like I should’ she’d said when he asked why. And neither of them felt particularly good about that answer.

After the statement he’s fine, not even fatigued. He’s alive.

He keeps looking at Martin.

Martin isn’t sure why he doesn’t want to look back.

Maybe it’s because it still feels like a trap, all of a sudden he comes back with no- no fanfare no effort. Right as rain and just... there.

Nobody else wants to deal with him right now- not after he just pulled a Lazarus like that. Jon wants to go to the institute. But Martin isn’t having it. He just woke up from a three-month coma. He’s going home. And yes- his lease apparently expired before the unknowing, so he doesn’t have a place to stay. And yes the only person willing to give him a place to stay is Martin. And Martin... well, it’s Jon. and even if it wasn’t, in the wake of losing three months of his life- and a friend. Or someone who had been a friend at a point before this all went to hell. He wouldn’t leave him alone for anything.

Martin tries to force himself to come to terms with it as they both climb into his car- this is what he wanted. He should be overjoyed. But it feels... it feels like if he looks at Jon for too long he’ll just... disappear. Or stop breathing again. Or stop being Jon.

“Good to see not too much has changed while I was gone.” Jon says wryly as he wrestles with the seatbelt. Which squeaks as he struggles to pull it out far enough to actually fasten it.

Martin just hums in response. Not trusting his voice not to betray whatever it is he’s feeling right now.

The drive to his flat is mostly quiet, aside from a few awkward attempts at conversation from Jon that all fall miserably flat. Eventually he gives up, and the rest of the drive is spent in silence. 

It’s not too far from the hospital to his flat. So before he knows it he’s leading Jon up the steps to his home.

It’s not much, he knows. Can’t afford anything truly fancy when carrying medical bills around. But it’s nice, homey. He hopes.

“Home sweet home.” He says, dropping his keys on the table by the door and hoping he sounds cheery. Because he doesn’t know what else to be right now. He’s figured out what emotion he’s feeling, though he’s not sure it counts as an emotion honestly.

Numb. 

Stupid, isn’t it? 

“The bathrooms down the hall- I think your stuff’s all in storage at the moment,” his voice wobbles at that, he swallows “so we’ll have to go get that soon. You can help yourself to anything in the fridge-” He’s stopped by a hand on his wrist. Familiar, too-thin, and cool.

“Martin.” Jon says. “Did I... did I do something to upset you?” It’s a question, small and helpless. Martin just wants to brush it off, he’s fine. He just needs time-

“You died, Jon.” He says instead. The words coming out unbidden.

“I- I came back.” He tightens his grip on Martins wrist for a moment before loosening  “In one piece even. I believe that was a part of our agreement” There’s a note of teasing in that last part, Martin wishes it was funny.

“I said come back safe Jon, not ‘come back from the dead’” Jon's hand drops from his wrist.

“Do you not... Are you not glad I’m back?” He sounds- sad. Of course he sounds sad Martin basically just said he wished he'd died.

“Of course I’m glad your back, I just-”

“Then what’s wrong?” The words are just- they’re just words. But Martin feels something pull in his chest.

Martin looks at Jon for the first time since the hospital.

“I’m scared, Jon! I You were dead for three months, Y-you didn’t even have a heartbeat and I-” He brings a hand upland runs it through his hair, Jon doesn’t need to hear this. He should be resting not listening to Martin dump his issues like this- “you were dead and I was the only one left. A-and yeah you came back, but- god what even is this! You’re just, fine. A-and I’m- I don’t want you to not be fine but I- I can’t even prove to myself that you’re real and not- I-I don’t-” He forces himself to stop. clamping his jaw shut around the words that suddenly feel like they’re pushing at the back of his throat like bile. Jon stares back at him, eyes wide and confused and hurt. He’s disheveled and still wearing the pajamas Martin had brought for him in the first week. Small and tired and maybe even real. He looks at Jon until he can’t because his vision begins to blur and his eyes begin to burn.

“Martin, I- I’m- I’m sorry I-” Jon's blurry form moves, and Martin shuts his eyes. Shaking his head. He should be the one apologizing, Jon didn’t need to hear that and he just- threw it at him.

“I’m-” Martin tries to apologize, but it comes out as little more than a croak. Cool hands cup his cheeks, and he opens his eyes. Jon's face is closer now, eyes scanning desperately over Martin's face.

“I- I’m not- I don’t know what I am but I’m- I-I’m me. I-I promise, I don’t know how to prove it to you but I-” Jon starts, and Martin can see his lips move to form the words-

Jon is here, he’s alive. He’s awake. His hands are on Martin's cheeks and he’s running his thumb through the tear tracks, fumbling over awkward reassurances. and looking so, so earnest. Hell, he made a joke about a conversation nobody else heard. Something just between the two of them, nobody else. And to fear entities, maybe that doesn’t matter. But for now, with Jon so close and acting so perfectly imperfectly Jon. Martin can let- no. Make himself believe. Jon’s not dead, it’s not a trap. Not right now, not yet. Just for right now, Martin isn’t alone anymore.

It doesn’t take much to lean forward, pressing their lips together. Jon makes a small, cut-off sound of surprise before melting into it, letting a hand move to the back of Martin's hair and the other fall to his shoulder. Martin's arms wrapping around Jon's waist.

Eventually they have to part for air. Martin doesn’t open his eyes, but he can feel Jon's breath on his face, and his hand in his hair and it’s all just another reminder he’s alive. And so wonderfully real.

He feels Jon move after a moment, using the hand he’s left on the back of Martin's head to guide him down. Pressing now-warm lips to the wet patches on his cheeks. Martin tries to laugh, he’s not sure why. It all just seems a little absurd all of a sudden. but it comes out as sort of a wet hiccup. Prompting Jon to tilt his head, and lock their lips together again.

Martin doesn’t know how long they stand in his entryway, trading kisses and just... being in each other's arms. But it’s long enough he’s run out of tears for Jon to try to kiss away, and the strange wired feeling has faded. Leaving him tired and heavy and in desperate need of a lie-down.

He pulls back, though not far. He can still feel Jon's lips against his as he speaks.

“Please don’t die again.” He says softly.

Jon sighs, pressing a small, chaste kiss against his lips.

“I’ll do my best,” he says, and Martin can feel the words as Jon's mouth brushes his as much as he hears them. And then he kisses Martin again, like he’s trying to seal the words there with his lips.

And, Martin supposes that promise was enough last time. It might be more than enough for him now.

[yo-im-a-bisexual]

This is my first time writing and i'm definitely no writer. English isn't even my first language. It is kinda long but I swear it's going somewhere. I just really love them and this will only work untill we get a new kieutou clip so whatever. Hope you enjoy. And I'm sorry if it sucks. constructive criticism is always okay but I will probably not take it into account because I am already depressed. Enjoy!!

Basically what I wish happened today for kieu my.

'but we'll definitely see each other when you come back?' 14:31

Kieu my stared at fatou's text notification on her phone, not knowing what to answer.

She still didn't know how to feel about their interaction on Tuesday, it all happened so fast and the last thing she wanted was to fight with her girlfriend.

At the time, leaving seemed like the best solution and Kieu my had every right to feel conflicted about what fatou said.

"you're the only thing distracting me from everything else at the moment"

The words resonate in her head. It hurt. Kieu my couldn't hide that those words are the ones that kept her up that night. And obviously, also the crazy situation they were in right now.

"Kieu my?" The words broke her out of her trance and she looked up from her phone to see Zoe looking at her with a worried look on her face.

"Are you okay? You've been checking your phone every five minutes since we got here" Zoe added getting closer to her

"yeah, I'm fine. I'm just... Forget it." She answered her best friend. "We're gonna lose the guys if we don't keep up" she said looking straight ahead.

Zoe didn't push her and just agreed. Kieu my put her phone back in her pocket. They jogged a little to catch up with their friends and they just kept walking.

She looked at the small group and laughed dryly to herself, which earned her a weird look from Constantin. Somehow her tall dumb friend got himself all the way to fricking Brandenburg and couldn't remember how. When Ismail told her about a 'Consti-emergency' she figured they would have to go get him from a ditch somewhere, she just would have never guessed it was from the countryside, one (1) and a half hour away from Berlin.

On the way there Ismail had told them that Constantin had called them completely trashed asking for help.

Kieu my really hasn't been keeping up with what's been happening in her friends lives. She felt bad. But at the same time, how could she? She's had so much to deal with between her parents and the shop and school and... Fatou. There she goes again. Even when she tries to be mad at her she just can't keep the skater out of her head. She reaches for her phone in her pocket when she hears a commotion ahead.

When she looks up she sees Contantin throwing up in a bush. She looks away not wanting to throw up herself.

"You guys go and head back i'll take care of... This" she hears Ismail say and when she turns back around she sees them patting the blonde's back

"are you sure?" Finn asks them and when they only nod their head 'yes' he looks at Zoe.

"yeah... okay let's go then" Zoe finally says after a minute of staring at the ground. "Text us if you need anything and when he... Calms down." She adds with a tight lipped smile. Zoe grabs her boyfriend's hand and her Best friend's arm and they start walking away.

"well that was... Unexpected?" Kieu my says after a few minutes of silence.

"yeah/yeah" both Finn and Zoe answer at the same time. "I'll text my brother and tell him we're coming back" Finn adds.

They got lucky this time around. Last time, they had to drive an hour to go get Constantin and drive back to Berlin in the middle of the night. But luckily Finn's brother somehow lived in Brandenburg so they didn't have to drive all the way back. When they got there and found the passed out boy they decided they all needed a break.

After about a twenty (20) minute walk and a small bus ride they finally got to the small house. It was cozy. Kieu my really couldn't complain. She got to share a room with her best friend while the boys would have to try and fit on the couch in the living room. Although she's pretty sure she's gonna sleep alone because Finn somehow managed to find another bed in what seemed to be the attic and with some good arguments managed to convince Zoe to sleep with him in there. But she's also pretty sure she won't be able to sleep anyway.

Like every winter day, night falls pretty fast. It's past 8 p.m and they already ate. Constantin is passed out on the couch and the others are talking about all sorts of things in the kitchen. Kieu my takes it as her queue to go to her room.

"I'm gonna get some rest. I need my beauty sleep" she tells them. They all say goodnight and she's left walking to her room alone.

It's only ten (10) minutes later when someone knocks at her door. "Can I come in kieu?" It's Zoe.

"yes, please"

"so are you ready to tell me what happened with Fatou or not?" Zoe asks nonchalantly.

"how did you even-" she gets cut off

"Come on Kieu, you're my best friend... and I saw the dozen texts she left on your phone" Zoe drags out

Kieu my falls on her bed and zoe sits next to her playing with her best friend's hair.

"I feel like I messed up... Like somehow I did something wrong and now she's pulling away from me" she starts and even before Zoe can say anything she continues. "But I just wanted to help her and she..."

"she what?"

"she said I was a distraction. And that I should leave her alone and she just got angry at me and I didn't want to fight with her so I... Left. Oh my god, I shouldn't have left right? Now she's gonna think I was there only for school stuff. She probably needed me and I left... Am I a terrible person Zoe?" She let out in barely one breath.

"See now you're spiraling. Take a breath, okay? No you are not a bad person. You were just upset and Fatou probably was too but those kinda things happen in a relationship. Me and Finn argue all the time and most of the time it's because one of us misunderstood something the other did or said" Zoe reassured her

Kieu my took a few deep breaths and sat up in the bed. She started playing With her fingers like she always does when she's feeling things.

"I guess I'm just scared that right now she's into me because I'm a good enough distraction but the moment she doesn't need me anymore... She'll just move on to someone more experienced or more interesting." The words leave her mouth with shaky breaths. Kieu my's eyes start shining but she blinks a couple time to keep the tears away.

"oh Kieu, you are such an idiot sometimes" the blonde laughs while kieu my looks at her dumbfounded. "Fatou is not like that. Nora once told me that one time, when the girls had a sleepover Fatou couldn't stop talking about you for the entire afternoon, so much so that when she fell asleep she was still saying your name" she continues. Kieu my blushes at the statement, thankful that the light is dim enough for her friend not to notice. Before Kieu my can say anything her very talkative friend continues. "She's smitten, Kieu. Maybe she just as some stuff going on. I mean don't we all" she adds wich earns a small laugh from her friend

Before they can continue their conversation someone knocks at the door and comes in without waiting for an answer. It's Finn, with a big smile on his face.

"hey girls!" He says way too excitedly. "I was wondering if Zoe.." he says looking at his girlfriend. "..Would like to come join me in our fine chambers?"

Zoe looks at her friend who is smiling at her. "Duty calls. Sorry. But if you wanna keep talking-" Kieu my cuts her off.

"Go, don't worry I'm fine. Thanks for the talk"

Zoe smiles one last time before running out of the room hand in hand with Finn.

Kieu my lays back down and closes her eyes. She can't help but think about Fatou. How does she manage to always be on her mind, it's unrealistic. She thinks about their date at the museum. Their date. She smiles to herself and covers her face with her arm to hide it. She thinks about how she nerded out to her and she just answered with something as nerdy. About how at that moment she kissed. About how well their lips fit together. About how happy she was that day. Maybe Zoe was right maybe she was spiraling.

Her phone rang and snapped her out of her thoughts. She looked at it for the first time since they got back. She gasps

It's Fatou. Of course it's Fatou, she probably thinks she ghosted her again. The moment she picks it up it stops ringing. Kieu my hesitates but puts it back down. She gets a text and as fast as she put it down she picks it back up. It's a text from Fatou. She also notices she's got some texts from her mom and a missed call from Ismail.

'hey, I just saw on your Insta you're doing a 'social media cleanse', sorry for calling you it's probably against that whole thing' -21:37

Right, Kieu my thinks, the social media cleanse.. that was Zoe's idea honestly. Another text.

'you looked really good in those pictures tho, real 'twilight' vibes🧛 -21:38

Kieu my smiles at her phone and starts to write an answer when she remembers that they haven't actually resolved their issue. And yes Fatou apologized but Kieu my expects something better than a text. On another hand she did tell her girlfriend to call her when she calmed down.

'can I call you again' -21:40 'please?' -21:40

Her phone rang again but this time she picked it up and answered. She waits a few seconds.

"hey.." she hears her girlfriend's tired voice from the other end

"hi." She says back, trying to keep her composure even behind the phone.

"how are you? I saw your posts and got worried"

"I'm.. fine, it was all pretty last minute" she answers

"Oh okay, It's good to hear your voice"

There's a silence, it's not awkward, somehow it's sad.

"Fatou?"

"yes"

"are you..." She begins but can't find the strength to finish.

"i'm not" she hears more than sees the sad smile. "I got fired"

"what- Why? When?" Kieu my asks

"Saturday. I messed up a bunch of times. Was late even. I don't know..." Fatou sounds so defeated

"I'm sorry. Why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know.. it's not your fault"

"Fatou. I just want you to know that I didn't come to your place just for school stuff. I wanted- I want to help you and I just feel so helpless because you can see right through me and I can't seem to understand any of your problems. I'm sorry." Kieu my starts rambling but gets cut off by Fatou laughing dryly.

"Are you serious? I was the asshole and you feel bad. I'm the one that should be sorry and I am. I am sorry. I don't have an excuse I shouldn't have snapped at you like that" Fatou says and Kieu my thinks that they don't have the same definition of snapped.

"Look, I don't like this, you being mad at me and us not talking so if you just give me a chance to really explain myself I would really like it if you would come and meet me when you get back" the skater girl continues

"yeah, I would also like that" she says with a small smile

"oh okay.. great.. well would you be up for a date at a ping-pong table bar then?"

"definitely"

"great, okay then I guess I'll just leave you to your cleansing"

Kieu my laughs

"goodnight Kieu my"

A pause

"goodnight Fatou"

She hangs up.

Kieu my knows that their conversation isn't over but for now she'll take it. For now it's good.

"was that Fatou?" A voice startles her from the doorway. It's Ismail.

"Shit- you scared me." She paused "Yes it was Fatou"

"Great cause I couldn't handle your sad moping face anymore. What'd you guys talk about?" They ask

She ignores his question. "I do not have a moping face." She says with a hurt look across her face. They look at her.

"Was it that obvious?" She asks with a frown

"Yes! Babe come on even Consti could have noticed if he wasn't puking his soul in the bushes" Ismail says dramatically. "Now come on give me the details. I need to know everything that is happening between my bestie and the mother of my tortoise" they sit next to Kieu my.

"you're so dramatic" she laughs. "Relax, we had a... Quarrel on Tuesday and she apologized and asked if we could meet up to talk about it" she tell them

"a quarrel? Okay m'lady... About?"

"some stupid school stuff" she lied.

"well you're a terrible liar because I overheard that entire phone call so what's up inside that little head of yours"

"Ismail, boundaries, please"

"oh please I've seen you at your lowest miss vu. There's literally nothing you can hide from me now."

She hesitates but starts talking anyway. "You know how I told you about me officially 'meeting' her friends last week" they nodded. "Well when she got there she was visibly upset and I didn't know why and then she got a text and got even more upset and now she just told me she got fired." She takes a breath. "And I just feel bad because those are all things I'm supposed to know about my girlfriend you know? Except she doesn't talk to me about that stuff and I don't know how to get her to open up.." she finishes breathless.

"you poor disaster" Ismail smiles and shakes their head. "You ask her" she's about to cut him off but they put their finger in front of her. "You find the right way to ask her. Love language Kieu my... Love language." They stand up and put their hand up like a shakespearean poet and goes on. "Give her time to open up, this is Fatou Jallow we're talking about. And remember communication is key." They finish, winking and walking backwards to the door and closing it behind them.

Kieu my was about to laugh at her friend's theatrics when the door opens up again and Ismail walks back in.

"no, but I just wanted to ask if I could sleep here cause Constantin has taken the whole couch and he smells like a dead body so...?"

The both of them laugh and Ismail slides next to Kieu my in the bed. "I'm gonna take that as a yes" they say.

"sleep well, ice queen" they mumble already falling asleep

"shut up" she smiles.

That night she dreamt about her girlfriend. She remembers all those weeks ago when her friend sleeping next to her asked her how the dreamy skater girl made her feel. At the time she hadn't known how to put her feelings into words. At that time her girlfriend was just a silly crush. Except Kieu my vu never got silly crushes. But she had instantly known Fatou was different. She was different then and she's different now. And with that thought she drifted into a peaceful sleep. Her insecurities forgotten for the night. She should have never worried about any of this in the first place. Soon she's gonna see the girl she loves again and everything will be alr-

*record scratch*

She woke up with a gasp.

"I love her"

She panted

"congrats, you're the last one to know" she heard Ismail mumble in their pillow.

She smiled to herself, feeling dumb for realising this just now. Looking at her phone she saw 5 a.m. deciding she deserved a little bit more sleep she closed her eyes and with a content sigh drifted back to sleep.

"when I get back we'll definitely see each other" she thought

Okay so I'm too lazy to read this and check for any mistakes so if there are any point them out and i'll fix it. Hope you enjoyed and if you took the time to actually read all this thank you I appreciate. Should I make a part 2? Or Fatou's pov maybe?

Update: the response as been amazing. Like I'm actually shocked by how nice some people can be. Thank you so much.

Re-update: I had my exams this week and am really fucking exhausted and i'm just gonna wait and see what happens tonight. If it's a sad clip i'm probably gonna write the version I would've wanted to happen but i guess we'll see. Sorryyy

[chellestrash]

Casual!Neil Headcanons

warnings: mentions of sex

authors note: okay christ, finally! I promised these headcaonons some time ago so im really sorry im just posting them now. I dont have much time to write since my bachelor's degree prep is taking most of my free time right now. Im not sure how I did with these I hope you’ll enjoy this and please let me know if you did.

Thank you all for your support and patience, I appreciate it a lot.

- Neil would never complain about what he does for a living, but saving the world from the potential threat of world war 3 and other disasters does get a bit tiring after a while

- So as much as he appreciates his work, he enjoys his downtime a bit more

- You usually spend your time off together, enjoying each other's company when you don't have to worry about running around the world and reversing yourselves for some bizarre reason.

- On the days he's not needed at Tenet, he never puts his suits on.

- He's a hoodie and sweatpants kinda guy but not many people know about it.

- Not many people get to see that side of him.

- But you do.

- You like seeing him relaxed like this, in his a bit oversized hoodie you plan on stealing later.

- In his loose trousers that seem to be at least 15 times more comfortable than his formal trousers.

- You usually spend a lot of time together during those days.

- Sometimes you go out, on walks, trips, sometimes even bike rides.

- And other times you just stay inside for a while, together.

- Neil cooks, and he's good at it, he knows it but won’t admit to it, definitely not in form of you.

- He finds joy in surprising you with different interesting dishes from time to time but what he enjoys most is seeing your reaction when he prepares your favorite food.

- Hot tea is an essential part of his day.

- He's not much of a coffee guy but yes, tea?

- You stopped counting how many cups he can drink per day.

- His favorite past time activities include reading, cooking, and playing chess…with himself

- You still find it funny sometimes but more so just extremely impressive.

- You did manage to put his own spin oh his hobby and nude chess became a thing you two did quite often.

- „It's a pleasure for both your body and soul.” He says. sitting on the couch without his shirt on as you sit on the floor in your underwear and try to focus on remembering who’s turn was it.

- Ask him to prepare some drinks and the fun usually lasts the whole evening.

- His mornings off are usually very calm and slow.

- You both wake up usually around the same time and get the kitchen together.

- You often help him around the kitchen, it's nice, you enjoy it.

- He prepares your breakfast and you prepare his.

- It's just one of the things that came naturally to you two.

- It's like a little gif for each other early in the day.

- On some days tho, he liked to sleep in.

- He enjoys staying in bed with you for a while.

- You lay together, cuddled up together.

- You mumble a quiet „morning” as he strokes your head softly.

- „Do we have any plans today?” You ask and he switches his position to wrap his arms tenderly around you.

- He pulls you in closer and buries his face in the nape of your neck.

- „Plan is, whoever leaves the bed first, has to wash the dishes from yesterday.”

- „Right, what if I have to shower?”

- „I don't care love.”

- „What if I tell you I have to shower and ask you to come with me?”

- Before you know it he carries you staring to the bathroom.

- He enjoys morning sex for sure.

- „If we're not counting breakfast, this might be my favorite way to start the day.”

- Later he often enjoys naps (I mean come on have you seen how sleepy he was in the movie?!)

- Sometimes he falls asleep while you two are watching a movie, and very often, he was the one who picked that movie in the first place.

- The evenings he prefers to spent inside.

- Sure he’ll go out from time to time, he'll have a few drinks and some fun but he does enjoy spending time alone, or alone with you a bit more.

- He often stays up for a long time, reading a book in bed.

- You woke up to him reading at 2 or 3am more time than you probably remembered.

- You don't want to disturb him because you know how much he enjoys this but at some point, you sit up on the bed next to him.

- „Is a good read?” You ask and he snaps out of his thoughts immediately.

- „What time is it? …shit.” He looks at the clock „How did I do that again?”

- You shrug with a small smile and he outs the book away quickly.

- „Right, come on, you should get some sleep love.”

- He pulls you close so you can rest your head on his chin and turns the night light off.

- „If ill sleep in tomorrow ill tell John it was your fault.”

[ectora]

So, after the post of season 2, I decided to continue with season 3. I wanted to do Until episode 9 cause that’s the strict half but I knew there was along break after episode 10 so I was like let’s do until ten. For the second part, I might do it for every episode separately in some sorte of episode review or whatever, or just wait for the end of the season and do a global season 3 post. We’ll see I guess, I’m an indecisive so I hate taking decisions lmao. Anyway, let’s get to it.

Screen time

Macy : 3h03m10s (10/10)

Mel : 2h47m12s (10/10)

Maggie : 2h40m57s (10/10)

Harry : 2h09m34s (10/10) (+Jimmie 7m37s)

Abigael : 47m40s (5/10)

Jordan : 1h02m24s (9/10)

Again, those numbers are not to the second but scene wise. The only time I would separate the screen time in the scene itself was if the focus was completely on one character (vision + sound) and we know another character is there but we don’t really see them).

As before, here a graph of the screen time per episode for each character.

*harry and jimmie’s screen time are mixed for the graph but again, Jimmie’s is like 7 minutes.

And here a graph of all the characters screen time by episode so it’s more easily comparable.

Now, again, the screen time is pretty obvious on the fact the sisters are and stay the focus of the show. But far. Though I’m Ngl, I was really surprised to see Maggie being the last of the three sisters. She had way more screen time in season 2 but idk in season 3 it also felt like she was also a bit ahead. At least of Mel. But I think that’s a question of how they handle the story. I think Maggie is actually the one with the best treatment out of the three sisters, with the more consistent development. So maybe that’s why she feels more present. Because she’s actually getting development. Mel, imo, can’t really say the same. She doesn’t have that much more screen time than Maggie and yet, to me, she feels a lot more less developed. Macy had her story focused around men last seasons. And if this season hasn’t fixed that issue when it comes to Hacy imo, I do feel she gets a bit more personal development. But still, Maggie feels the most developed to me.

Jordan is more present in the story so that’s good. I love him and I hope they can find him a good place in the story as a human because he’s a sweetheart. To be honest however, he could have a bit more screen time Ngl. Same can be said for Abigael. I personally have the feeling that the story she has now wasn’t necessarily planned if I’m being honest, which is why it feels so detached. And obviously she needs to have her story more liked to the main storyline and TCO so her presence can be more natural and cohesive. However when you think about it, half the episode when we’re half way through the season, for a regular/main character, it’s a bit weird. I hope going forward, they’ll fix both these issues. Have her be in more episode and linking her to the main story.

Detailed screen time

As I did last time, here are the tables with their detailed screen time with each other main characters.

* group means 2+ characters of the core six that doesn’t involve all three sisters.

To be honest, these tables brought light on issues we - I think- were already aware of. Mel/Macy for example is basically inexistant. It’s really sad to see them barely share scenes just the two of them. Like Mel and Maggie have really nice scenes together where we can see them talk and bond. Macy has that sometimes with Maggie too. But Mel and Macy ? We barely even know what their relationship is if I’m being honest. Like it feels like Maggie and Mel have each other and they make Macy have Harry. He is her one to go, the one they develop her relationship with the most which, imo opinion, shouldn’t be the case.

It brings me to my next point. I know it’s only half season but TCO purely together isn’t even the biggest screen time anymore. Hacy actually is. Love them or not, that’s not the topic, I think there is the need of a discussion about how they slowly shifted the focus of these two characters toward each other. The pairing isn’t an issue, the way it’s handled kinda is. Because at the end of the day it’s also a disservice to both of them. I know COVID is to be taken into account and that they’re limited in the interaction and that Harry is the most integrated of the three main supportive characters but it is still an issue. Even in the story, Harry is all about his relationship and sometimes forgets his duties. Macy’s first thought is basically Harry. They could have used some of this time to develop further the sisters between themselves. Like Maggie and Mel don’t feel as centred on their romance while Macy definitely feels like it’s the major characteristic of her character right now. Same with Harry.

In a general manner however, they’ve been doing better with the sisters sharing scenes that aren’t all about fighting but there is still some serious work to be done. As said, Mel and Maggie for example have some nice scenes where it’s a bit more domestic. They talk about their actual lives more. Maggie has that a bit with Macy too but it’s mostly Mel/Maggie. While Macy talks to Harry.

When it comes to their personal time, by that I mean without the core six, they have around the same time so that’s good. Tho again, as I said before, they have around the same time but it feels like some character just have better written development.

I’m also glad to see Jordan and Abigael share screen with a bit more characters but also would like to have more mix between the mains. It’s almost odd at this point to see Jordan interact with anyone else than Maggie and Harry. I loved his episode with Macy but it almost felt random because he shared 90% of his time with Maggie. Abby it’s a little bit less the case because I feel like in season 2 she had the opportunity to share scenes with all of them (and I want more cause I love it) but now I would like to see her interact with others more too.

PAIRINGS

Hacy : 53m11s

Joggie : 18m18s

Abimel : 12m37s

Melby : 5m58s

That’s probably one of the things that annoy me the most in the show so bare with me.

Let’s start with the small things. I’m Ngl, I’m a bit confused about Maggie. Jordan is pretty obviously supposed to be her love interest I think we can all agree on that. I don’t know if they’re trying to throw some love triangle drama or fake drama with Antonio but well. In any case, I think they’re just a bit more slow burn. And I do think they’re actually the best written romance in the show since the beginning. Maggie never feels centred around Jordan. And tho Jordan does majorly gravitates around Maggie, he also gets a story and development. And yet their love connexion is obvious. Don’t know why they can’t do that with others.

I think I made my issue with Hacy rather clear. Not the ship itself but the way the show does it. I mean their time is clearly superior to everyone else (and i know it’s because Harry is technically the fourth character in terms of importance and is integrated in the story but still, I think there are still things to be fixed about this) and I think the way the show tend t have these two continuously gravitate around each other first is a disservice and just too much at this point. Like in ten episodes they have had more than the entirety of season 2. I’m pretty sure it means something.

Which leads me to my last point. And the most annoying one. Mel. It’s a whole other level. The show has a serious issue on their hands. Mel is the only sister that isn’t straight. And her relationship are not even remotely treated the same as her sisters. Season 2 was one thing. But season 3 makes it so painfully obvious. And it’s not ok. She has two potential ships. And yet, the screen time of these two combined is barely above Maggie’s with Jordan. And not even half Hacy’s. And that’s a genuine issue. I need the show to start treating their lgbt relationship the same way they do the straights. I’m tired of ghosts. I’m tired of unseen. I’m tired of two dimensional. Of the lack of development. Or the unbalance with her sisters. It’s enough.

Talking about her potentiality, the show definitely has me confused with the whole Abimel/Melby situation. They’re hinting hard on the first one while keeping the second in the background. Which is entirely confusing. And low key a problem too. Because yes I ship Abimel but I do think Melby deserves better. And if the show is just keeping melby while they can develop Abimel then that’s just weird too.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Melby just doesn’t feel like a relationship the show has any interest of putting effort in. Ngl, when Mel said at ClexaCon that the writers didn’t really give them backgrounds or anything, it didn’t sound like freedom, it sounded like they just didn’t care enough to develop it. Sometimes, it almost feels like they just kept it around because of the Abigael backlash, so have a sapphic relationship while they can develop something else on the side. Ruby has a charming actress so she has that working for her, but her character is very superficially developed, they didn’t bother to give her depth and it doesn’t feel like it was meant to last with the whole not wanting to be involved in magic thing. I’m not trying to bash anyone or any ship, but that relationship does feel very superficial in terms of writing. And honestly if they’re just keeping it around while building something else, it’s in itself annoying due to the nature of the relationship. Like at that point it’s not even the bare minimum.

Abimel seems more build up already. They’ve been hinting at it since season 2, poring them all the time. The lines. The tensions the chemistry. The connexion. It genuinely feels like that’s were they were going toward. Because it just makes sense. It also makes sense in terms of pairing. All three sisters have their love interest in the main cast. Enemies to lovers trope. As said, it makes sense. But also who actually knows. Because let’s be honest, the show has an history with not treated sapphics the same way as straights. Which is even more obvious in this first part of the season and looking at the numbers. Again I understand Ruby is not a regular (which reinforce my previous points). But likes. That’s what brings me to say again and again that at this point, the show needs to either actually commit to that relationship and make Ruby an actual part of the show or let it go. Because what we have right now ? Not ok. Because they give us zero energy. And I’m pretty sure that if they wanted to actually do more, they definitely could have. Right now, the show is under a pretty bad light when it comes to lgbt characters and their treatment. It’s a bit ridiculous and it’s just not right.

Anyway, I think this concludes my rant. I’m sorry it’s very, very long and for WHAT 😭 I have too much time on my hands I’m telling you. Anyway, if you read all of that I hope you’re enjoyed but also you probably, too, have too much time.

[kris-p-banana-bread]

Here DOAFP fandom, have some organic, locally-sourced, home-grown pain. This is basically just me, a scarred older sibling, projecting on Bobby, another scarred older sibling. I really reached into my post-loss psyche for this, so I hope you enjoy the headcanons and meta (AKA I hope you shed at least one tear).

It won’t let me link it here so the post that inspired this is under the read more at the bottom ✨

- When I first watched doafp, I couldn't understand Elena's aversion to Sam becoming a prominent figure in her mom's and her life. Now I understand it almost too perfectly. There was never supposed to be someone after Robert. He and Gabi were deeply in love and happy. Robert was it; he was the first and true love of Gabi's life. Sam showing up probably felt like a huge and utterly disrespectful slap in the face of Robert's memory, because he wasn't even supposed to be there. I don't know if that's as eloquent as I wish it was, or if it makes sense, and it probably sounds really mean to Sam, but it's not even really about him. It was always supposed to be Robert; Sam hasn’t earned the right to be apart of or associated with her family

- After Robert dies, Gabi and Bobby make it a habit to find and keep photos and recordings/videos of Robert, even if the latter only has him saying one sentence. They won't make Elena join them for the search, but after they find some of those old audios of Robert, they'll sometimes play them back for little Elena

- Bobby put up the keep out sign (I credit this to a few other blogs for discussing this tho) because that's where he would cry sometimes. He actually used to be pretty close with Elena, but after he put up that sign and started distancing himself from them a bit so they wouldn't see the times he cracked, he got a little more short and jaded with her. It's that, plus just growing into a teenager and stuff. And I'm not saying that he and Elena have a bad relationship, but he's become more snappy and has more walls up than he used to

- Sometimes Elena feels bad because she doesn't always remember her dad's voice. She was pretty young when he died, so even though she recalls it a bit, and the recordings help, it's been a while since she's talked to him in person, so of course she doesn't quite remember what it's like to actually talk to Robert and she's forgotten some of his mannerisms. She likes to think she's all done (she marked the stages down in her grief journal after all) but grief isn't linear or all that rational, so it hits her hard sometimes

- I keep reading as an action close to my heart because that's a strong bond me and my mom shared. She would rec books to me, and we would joke and talk about them, or she would hint to some future event and then refuse to tell me until I caught up to that part. So Elena and Bobby do something similar in their grief. Elena has writing and words, because that's something Robert loved if I remember correctly (but if I’m not and that’s not canon, then I now declare it so) and Bobby has tennis. But besides tennis (I sent a couple anons to @freshlybakedfandoms about it but I'm not sure where she went) Bobby also was taught to play guitar by Robert (I liken it to Devi Vishwakumar and her harp) so when he misses his dad or is just sad, he'll take out his dad's old acoustic and strum

- (This next one is something I also think a lot about so this is pretty much 98% projection) Bobby thinks sometimes about the fact that he was never able to come out to his dad. He hadn't really started growing into that part of himself yet, and he never got to show it to his father. He wonders what he would have thought of him. Would he be angry? Would he dismiss him and say it was just a phase? Bobby didn't think so, but a little part of him insisted that you could never be too sure. After he comes out, Gabi and Cami assure him that Robert would've been so proud of him and would've loved him regardless (Since we know virtually nothing about him, I maintain that Robert was one of those dads who teases their kid relentlessly about their crushes and I think he would've done that with Bobby and eventually Elena)

- When Elena's quince rolls around (if she chooses to have one of course), Sam dances with her during the father-daughter dance. A part of her still hurts, still aches and wishes that Robert were dancing with her too; still knows on some fundamental level that he and Gabi had planned for this day, but he had simply never made it. But she's known Sam long enough that she feels comfortable here. Nobody can replace Robert, but Sam is her family, and it feels right like this.

- I might do some more research and deliberate, but for the moment I'm saying that Robert had cancer, I’m thinking along the lines of colon. My mom was terminal, but idk if I should make Robert terminal? Maybe towards the end. Or maybe he was diagnosed as incurable early on but Gabi kept it from the kids because, tbh, being told your parent is balancing on that kind of edge is traumatic for them. So anyways, I’m going on that assumption for this last point, and I’ll see if I can recover some of my old knowledge and talk about technical stuff later if anybody would like to hear it

- Elena and Bobby were both pretty young. Bobby understood about PET scans and tests somewhat, and knew generally what different answers from doctors meant. Elena mainly just understood what was happening by reading her parents' and brother's expressions when getting lab results in from the doctor. They both remember on some level what it was like when Gabi would leave the kids with Cami and take Robert out to the car (later she would have to help him) and they would all feel like they were holding their breath until they got back and confirmed that everything was ok (and later, the little shocks of fear when the answers were no longer as positive and there was more apprehension and risks. After all, cancer doesn’t deal in absolutes)

- Bobby can still remember Robert when he had to stop walking around a lot. He still remembers the phone call that Cami got from his mom, saying that something had gone wrong, and if this last treatment didn’t work, he wouldn’t have much time before he passed. Still remembers Cami rushing into a room when she got that call, and trying to hide what was happening until Gabi could get home and explain it; but Bobby was a sharp kid believe it or not. He heard about the treatment, heard Cami crying. He still had hope... but when Robert came home in a gurney, when he could barely stay awake sometimes, when his voice was quiet and his skin was a little jaundiced, Bobby felt incredibly empty. But Robert always had a smile for his wife and his beautiful kids, even if it was small and very tired, his eyes still crinkled the same. He always had a smile; right up until they had to say goodnight and get some sleep one night. And then... he passed.

- After he passed, the Cañero-Reeds needed help, and a lot of Gabi’s coworkers would bring food or materials if they were running low. Cami and Danielle would babysit and would distract the kids when Gabi needed a good cry.

- Like you’d imagine, and because of what is sort of implied in canon and in my own head, the kids dealt with it in different ways. Bobby put up that sign, and withdrew. He wasn’t awful, but his patience with certain people got a bit shorter and he was a bit quieter. And he was a really good helper when he had the energy and he cared deeply, but he would sometimes get physically and emotionally exhausted after helping Gabi/Elena/Cami/anybody else with something and would go into his room or mentally tap out to recharge. He took comfort in things that seemed natural and that he sometimes took for granted before, like video games and skateboarding (hehe bobby skateboards. Anybody second me on this?) and clothes etc... and other stuff. A lot of materialistic things or experiences that he would skip out on before. But they bring normalcy back to his life now so he loves them for that.

- Bobby doesn’t wanna think about big themes or anything anymore, which I can’t remember but I think it was Vi (freshlybakedfandoms, again, idk where she is and I hope she’s ok) who said he was a math and science person and I think that as much as that could transfer over to those subjects as well, it’s much harder to avoid existential and emotional themes in English and History class and Bobby doesn’t like it as much as Elena does for that reason. He had to live with the back and forth of his dad’s treatments and tests, so math and science is comforting because it’s more concrete (There could be a million arguments for why he would distrust math and science because of his dad’s passing though, I realize) Ultimately, though, it reminds him of Robert too much.

- On the other hand, after a period of shock and confusion, Elena threw herself into new things. First it was a grief journal, to make sure she was going through the motions. Then she read a lot, and when she felt too alone or like she wasn’t doing enough, like she was stagnant, she’d just find something to focus and persevere on again. That feels like her personality type to me; something is wrong so let’s fix it right away. But that could also transfer sort of negatively into “Something feels off or I’m very sad, let’s get this thing done and be productive so we can put off having to confront that but at least we get work out of it” but I could be entirely wrong (this is based off some of my family members and how they dealt with the loss.) And Elena throws herself into history and english because her dad loved it, and she wants to remember more of him. Because she believes words have power and history is a lesson and that’s incredibly interesting for her

[naitiaclo960writings]

Day 8 - Heartless

(Warnings: Past major character’s death and quick mention of disease / grief. It’s an happy ending tho)

September

When Castiel fell asleep in the operating room on the morning of September 14, he was prepared to never wake up again. He had never been a religiously committed man unlike his parents, and yet he knew that he had prayed before closing his eyes.

It has been more than 3 months since he entered the list of organ recipients to replace his heart tired by illness. Unfortunately, he had inherited a heart malformation from birth and had survived to the age of 28 without being too disabled, but the congenital heart disease had caught up with him midyear. After a whole series of tests and a permanent hospitalization, the doctors had been very clear: either he had a heart transplant or he had only a few months left to live.

The hardest part was seeing his friends and family coming to see him every day with a darker face as nothing moved on the side of the organ center. Castiel was aware that he was not a priority among the thousands of people in need of a heart in the United States, but he tried to remain optimistic for the people he loved. His fight was rewarded a few days ago when he was told he had found a match donor.

For medical reasons, Castiel and his family weren’t allowed to know who the donor was. It was obviously not the priority in the eyes of all, but Castiel had insisted on knowing more and he had simply been informed that a heart had become available following a fatal road accident in the nearby city. There was something macabre about celebrating someone’s death, but that person had been generous enough to help other souls struggling to live and he could only salute that gesture.

"Take a deep breath." The nurse intimated, securing a mask on his face.

Thus the day of the fateful operation had arrived and Castiel was terrified. There were so many things to consider, so many factors that could tip the scales one way or the other. After one last thought to his family and, surprisingly, to his donor’s family, Castiel did as he was asked.

* * *

October

The operation was a success. He opened his eyes after said surgery. There was nothing more to say except that Castiel was grateful every day for the new beating heart in his chest. It was with this heart that he could now embrace his loved ones, laugh with his friends and discover a world he thought destined to disappear beyond the doors of this hospital.

Castiel was still in hospital and in the recovery phase, but he was doing well and could be out very soon according to his doctors. He had seen the scar on his chest last week and he couldn’t help but cherish it. This mark was the sign that he had survived. The sign that he had the right to live longer and to continue to build his life away from the health problems that had accompanied him all his life.

He was currently distracted by the television channels in his room — the afternoon programs were truly deplorable — when the nurse came in to serve him his meal.

"Hi Clarence. How’s my hottest patient today?" She exclaimed.

Castiel turned his head towards her with a small awkward smile as usual. He stood up gently in bed. 

"Hello Meg." He said politely. "I’m fine, my scar doesn’t even itch anymore."

Meg was definitely his favorite nurse and it seemed to be mutual. She had told him one day that she always arranged to be assigned to his room, for she liked their conversations, and Castiel could only agree with her. Despite her bad girl tease, Meg was now a good friend, always listening and present to support him in addition to being a good caregiver. Her honesty had helped Castiel to carry on in his fight against the disease and during his remission. They sometimes spent long minutes discussing their respective lives before Meg’s pager rang and she was called away. In addition, she sometimes smuggled him chocolate bars to make up for the hospital food and Castiel calling it "a survival aid".

"I hope so!" Meg said, setting up his lunch tray with a small smile." But at least it has the merit of giving you a little adventurous side. Did I ever tell you I have a thing for guys with chest scars?"

Castiel laughed softly, playing the game they both took pleasure in maintaining. Despite everything, it didn’t go any further than that: a game to brighten their days. Both knew how to settle for their already atypical friendship.

"At least twice a day." Castiel joked while leaning in his pillows. "Did anyone leave a message for me today?"

Meg could not help sighing and Castiel pinched his lips with sympathy.

They both knew what that meant. Castiel had insisted on registering on a site that put organ donor families and recipients in contact. However, the process was complex and if the family of his donor did not post any message on this site, then Castiel would have no chance to get in touch with them. Yet he was almost obsessed with this situation. He had this need, no, this irrepressible urge to thank the family of the one who had saved his life. It was something so important and, although he respected the choice of some to remain anonymous, he felt that he would not be able to leave this all behind until he had put a definitive end to this chapter of his life.

"No, Clarence, squat" Meg shook her head. "And even if they did, you know very well that you will not be able to contact them. The site does not allow any personal information or too intimate exchanges between families."

"I know." Castiel replied, abashed while planting his fork in the mashed peas. "But perhaps they will make an exception? I just want to know them and thank them for the gesture of their loved one".

Meg clicked her tongue while pushing the wagon towards the door.

"I know you want to do the right thing, you’re a damn angel with a halo over your head." She gave him a small grin of disgust that made Castiel smile. "But what if they didn’t want to meet you? They are probably—"

"Living a difficult situation and I would only remind them of their loss, yes, I know." Castiel mumbled without being able to help it. "But… Maybe that they also would like to know that the death of their loved one helped other people cope. It’s possible Meg. And maybe they just don’t know how to contact me or-"

Meg shook her head again with a little compassionate pout.

"Even if they knew, handsome, they couldn’t. It’s against the law. Medical confidentiality and all that crap." She sighed before she came to sit on the chair beside him and put her feet on his bed.

Castiel let out a groan of frustration.

"Yes… But there are necessarily registers somewhere, a way to find a contact." Suddenly, something seemed to light up in his eyes and he turned his hopeful face towards Meg.

"Oh no, don’t give me that look." She groaned, knowing that it was not good news.

Castiel ignored her.

"Could you have access to organ donor records? You told me the heart came from the next town."

"And just by doing that, I’ve already told you too much." Meg said, raising an insolent eyebrow.

"You must be able to find an address, right? There must be even a name or maybe a phone number. I mean, if it’s a medical secret then the information has to be somewhere. If I could just put my finger on a semblance of something, it would be…" He moistened his lips, thinking. " It would be incredible."

Meg grumbled again, throwing her head back with exaggeration.

"Let’s say I have access to this information, and I mean maybe. Just giving it to you could cost me my job, Clarence. Why is it so important for you to find the name of a dead guy?" She snapped.

At these words Castiel’s face slumped slightly. He remained silent for a moment, seeking the right answer to this question. Meanwhile, he felt his heart squeeze in his chest and the blood it sent to his brain was enough to formulate his next words.

"Because it is unfair that I survived among so many others." He said." My donor had relatives, maybe siblings, a dog, friends and all lost something too valuable to be replaced in this car accident. Yet that’s how organ donation works. Someone dies and allows others to live. But I know that, if I had died on that operating table, my parents would have liked to know through whom I would have continued to live. I feel responsible Meg."

Castiel took a shaky breath before gently biting his lip while his friend welcomed his words with contemplative silence. Television continued to gossip in the background, but Castiel no longer heard it, lost in his thoughts.

"And yet, you are not." Meg said gently, leaving aside her usual sarcasm this time.

Castiel nodded slowly.

"I know." He sighed again before returning to his plate. "I’m sorry, you’re right. I can’t ask you anything like that anyway, it was selfish of me."

Following this, only the noise of the cutlery against the ceramics as well as the television journalist was heard in the hospital room. Meg didn’t move, didn’t open her mouth either, while each of them thought about their commitments in this story.

Finally, after several minutes of silence, the nurse sighed dramatically.

"What the hell wouldn’t I do for those beautiful blue eyes." She said under her breath. "Okay, I’ll see what I can do about the address." She says while rolling her eyes before standing up.

Castiel turned his head so quickly towards her that he was afraid to break his neck.

"What?" He asked, stunned.

"But I can’t guarantee you anything, Clarence." Meg told him while sighing. "You don’t access their organ donor files like that, but… I may have a couple of people I could contact. But it’s just between us."

She glared at him, and Castiel nodded, mouth open.

"I... of course."

Meg swore softly.

"One more thing." She said." I’ll try everything, but if I don’t find anything, you have to promise me you won’t try to get a name anymore. Do we have a deal?"

Castiel closed his mouth in a discreet snap before taking his friend’s last words into consideration. Finally, he nodded again.

"I promise you." He said seriously.

"Good." Meg sighed. "You’ll owe me one, angel."

A smile appeared again on Castiel’s face, more tender this time, his heart still playing up its own behind the scar of his chest.

"Thank you, Meg." He whispered.

"Shuddup." She grumbled with a wink before her pager rang in the room.

In no time, she waved at him and disappeared in the corridor, taking the empty wagon with her. Castiel went back to his bed with a light smile on his face. Yes, Meg was a good friend.

* * *

November

Meg’s research had still not yielded anything even a month after Castiel left the hospital. Although he was now alone again in his large apartment, there was something exhilarating about being able to live normally as if he had not nearly died a few months ago. Finding a job at the florist in his town had been the first step in his new life as he slowly resumed a normal social life with his friends and family.

His own search had also given nothing and the inbox of the website that could put him in contact with his donor’s family remained hopelessly empty. Nevertheless, Castiel did not get the idea out of his head. He often dreamed of meeting these strangers, of the words he would say to them if they had the chance to do so.

It was during a cold November evening, while he was bundled up in a plaid on his couch in front of a TV show, that Castiel’s cellphone rang. It was not something particularly unusual, but the late hour of the evening immediately gave this call something special. When he reached out to his phone, he could see Meg’s name on the screen.

"Hello?" He said, picking up, his heartbeat accelerating.

"Hi Clarence." Meg, a net of excitement in the voice, hastily replied. "Tell me you’re sitting, handsome, I’d hate to hear you fall on your ass because of what I’m about to tell you."

At this, Castiel straightened up in the sofa, his heart going up his throat.

"I’m sitting." He simply said, his fingers tightening around his phone.

"Okay, because I have something for you!" Meg hummed. "The info cost me at least three boxes of chocolate and the promise of a date to the shady guy in the operating room. You know, the one who keeps wearing Britney Spears t-shirts under his blouses? He’d be doing karaoke parties with the girl from the fourth floor that I wouldn’t even be surprised at-

"Meg." Castiel impatiently cut her off.

"Yes, yes. All this to say that he knows who approved your transplant application. So…" She said with pride, leaving a second of silence to settle her effect. I know where your little heart comes from and how to reach out to the family!"

At once, Castiel felt the air blocked in his throat. These words, he had waited for them for months while everything gradually turned into a crazy and inaccessible hope. Suddenly, through a simple phone call, Meg had just remade his world.

"Are you certain?" He finally asked, with a short breath.

"Oh, Clarence, please! Don’t you trust your favorite nurse anymore?" Meg laughed immediately.

Castiel shook his head, a bit stunned. Meg resumed.

"I sent you everything by e-mail, you must have received it." She said with malice. "But remember: keep it under your hat pretty boy. You don’t know me."

"Yes, I... of course." Castiel stuttered, rising to rush towards his computer.

"Hey." Meg called him through the phone, her voice softer. "I know it’s important to you, but… take the time to assimilate the information, okay? You don’t have to contact them tonight."

Castiel knew she was right, but the excitement was in his chest. However, he took the time to thank Meg warmly and invite her to dinner next week before hanging up. A few minutes later he had his eyes fixed on a brand new e-mail in his inbox. Castiel took a great inspiration. He had waited so long for this moment that, now that he was faced with a fait accompli, he was almost afraid to go for it.

Finally, he found the courage to click on the screen. His eyes quickly passed over her friend’s introductory text before fixating on a name written in bold as well as a lot of personal information listed just below. Reading these few lines, Castiel felt his heart racing again.

Samuel William Winchester

Born: March 2, 1983, in Lawrence, Kansas

Died: September 13, 2006, in Des Moines, Iowa

Cause: Head injury, road accident

Blood type: O negative

Applicant for organ donation: Yes

Organ removed: Heart

The data sheet thus continued in a professional coldness that affected Castiel slightly as he felt his throat tightening. His donor was only 23 when he died. He read every piece of information carefully before he got to the part he was most interested in.

Contact person in case of problem: Dean Winchester

Donor affiliation: older brother

Castiel felt his hands become sweaty as his gaze slid over the address and telephone number of Dean Winchester. A heavy silence filled his apartment, Castiel still unable to detach his gaze from this decisive email.

That’s it. The family of his donor was only a phone call away and he could finally thank the entourage of his savior. However, with this crucial information came a bitter feeling that Castiel had not apprehended. He remained all night pacing in his living room, his eyes regularly returning to the phone number taunting him from the screen of his computer.

* * *

December

Three months. Three long months since his little brother had disappeared in a car accident, leaving him and their parents in the grip of nameless sadness. He could barely breathe most of the time thinking of that youthful face he would never see again.

Dean passed a tired hand over his face as he walked past the windows of an umpteenth shop decorated with trees and garlands. Celebrating Christmas seemed absurd, totally meaningless in such a context. What’s the point if he can’t see Sammy’s jaded face in front of his usual porn magazine that he buys especially for him every year, for the joke? His world has been tasteless for far too long now.

Mary managed to keep her head above water half the time, calling him every day to hear from him, to which Dean responded with as many reassuring words as he could. Everyone knew that most of them sounded empty, but they could only pretend to be okay these past few months. Dean was wondering if the pain would eventually go away. He was told yes. He doubted that. John, on the other hand, drank a little more every day and Dean felt guilty about leaving his mother with him all day, regardless of Mary’s reassuring words.

The ground seemed to collapse under his feet as Dean looked for a way out. The truth is, he didn’t know how to do it without breaking everything around him. His days passed one after the other in a sickly similarity: work, eat, reassure, start again. He no longer had his stupid little brother to listen to his stories, no one to share his Friday night evenings with and who would be there to support him in any situation. He had his friends left, but, honestly, no one could understand him like Sam did for 23 years.

An umpteenth sigh passed through the barrier of his lips when a rock-like music rose out of his pocket. Already worried that it was still his mother, Dean took out his cell phone. Unknown number. He raised an eyebrow and picked up.

"Hello?" He said in a hoarse voice.

The line remained silent and Dean frowned. He could hear a breath at the other end of the line, so he tried again.

"Hello?"

"Oh, uh, yes! Hello, sir, uh, Dean?" An uncertain voice immediately answered with a short breath and tangled words.

Dean raised an eyebrow. Had he given his phone number to anyone recently? Not to his knowledge in any case, he very rarely went outside the garage in which he worked. Curious, Dean turned into a quiet street to concentrate on his interlocutor.

"Who am I speaking with?" He asked with a hint of sarcasm.

The man on the other side of the phone seemed to take a breath before resuming in an equally nervous tone.

"I’m sorry, we don’t really know each other. I am aware that my call may be unwelcome, in fact I hesitated for a long time before contacting you." The man stuttered.

Dean sighed.

"Well, listen, if it’s to sell me something then I’m not interested, thank you."

"No!" The man quickly added. "No, I don’t want to sell you anything. I…" Another inspiration."My name is Castiel Novak. I live in Waterloo. I know this is going to sound weird, but… I received your brother Samuel’s heart."

Dean remained silent for a long time, trying to assimilate each of the words he had just heard. At the sound of Sam’s name, he thought he was dying a bit more. A kind of thud rose in his ears, so that he thought he had fallen into a pool while he was not paying attention to his steps. Besides, Dean wasn’t even sure where he was, now standing still in the middle of the street. Only a deep and sizzling voice gradually emerged from his torpor.

"I am sorry." Castiel went on after a long silence. "I’ve taken the liberty of contacting you, but I can assure you that I don’t want to cause you any more trouble than that." He seemed to be searching for his words for a moment." I know I could never thank Samuel for his gesture, but... your brother saved my life. I just wanted to let you know how grateful I was, even though I couldn’t replace what you lost. If there’s anything I can do to help, it would be my pleasure. However, I also understand that you would never want to hear from me again... But I can assure you that I will take care of his heart. Samuel really did a lot of good in my life and with my loved ones." 

Castiel started to mutter, as if he was suddenly deeply embarrassed by this phone call. Dean was convinced that he had to send back the image of a man ravaged by grief right now, his arms swaying and his gaze lost.

"Sam." He finally replied in a trembling voice. Dean took the time to clear his throat before continuing. "He preferred to be called Sam."

"Okay." Castiel said after another moment of hesitation. "Well… Sam really is a hero to me, Dean, I wanted you to know that."

Dean nodded stupidly, no matter how Castiel couldn’t see him. He felt that the sky had just fallen on his head, he felt completely disoriented. Of course Sammy was a hero, the rest of humanity didn’t even know how lucky they were to be around him. Dean knew that Sam had donated his organs, he had even given everything he could, because he was like that. But knowing that the heart was beating in someone else’s body, giving them a chance to continue to live and breathe… It was something he hadn’t really thought about until then.

"I’m going to leave you, I’m sorry I interfered in your life like this." Castiel apologized again. "I will not call this number again, I promise. I hope everything will be all right for your family, sincerely."

Dean’s heart skipped a beat and his muscles began to move, pushing him to almost scream on the phone.

"No, wait!" Realizing that Castiel had still not hung up, Dean quieted down, a shiver in his voice. "I don’t even know how you found this number, but… Well, it doesn’t matter. You’re from Waterloo? Iowa?

"Yes." Castiel said. "I’m about a two-hour drive from Des Moines. I don’t know if you live nearby, but-

"Des Moines, yeah." Dean replied, stunned. How did this guy know so much about Sam, he thought that the organ donation was anonymous? "Would you be available to meet in the week?"

An umpteenth silence answered his question and, frankly, Dean himself did not know why he had asked it. Maybe he was holding on to a ghost, a hopeless, senseless hope of finding something that once belonged to Sam. But what else did he have to lose now?

"… Are you going to punch me in the face if I say yes?" Castiel asked with distrust.

Surprisingly, it snatched a small laugh from Dean who barely recognized the sound of his voice. He hadn’t laughed that easily in weeks now.

"No." He answered. "I just want to talk, if that’s okay?"

He didn’t know what to think of this situation, it was too surreal. Was he angry with this man? No, not really. Sad? Maybe, but nothing new. Curious? Certainly. There were so many questions that now turned in his mind, almost stunning him. Never before had he heard a similar story and, yes, he was driven to the unknown by the despair of that mourn which he had never ended. But to hell with it, he needed to feel Sam’s heart beating against his hand again.

"Okay, I’d love to, then. What’s your schedule?"

Dean felt a piece of his soul warming up.

* * *

January

Their first encounter had definitely been strange and completely atypical. They had arranged to meet in a café halfway between their two cities, and despite a tense start, Dean and Castiel had talking much of the afternoon. Dean had been biting his tongue all along so he wouldn’t ask the fateful question of "excuse me, can we stop talking so I can put my hand against your heart?". But Castiel had finally come to the point by asking him if he could tell him about Sam and things had been done naturally. It was as if someone had opened the floodgates and quickly, Dean was unable to stop the incessant flow of words about his little brother. He told him the most important thing, from his childhood memories to that weird tic that Sam had every time he was upset.

Castiel had then smiled softly at each of his anecdotes and, when Dean had finally been allowed to feel this pulsating heart against his hand, Castiel had not moved. Dean was almost certain that he had let slip a strangled exclamation, but Castiel had just contented himself with that sweet and understanding look. At the end of their appointment, they had agreed to meet again. They both needed it.

The month of February began on another encounter at the park this time, at Des Moines. The winter was still rough and persistent this year, so they had decided to go and enjoy a hot chocolate near the pond. Dean hadn’t told his parents about it, not yet, but this meeting with Castiel did him as much good as the first. When he returned home, he found himself feeling much lighter than before.

They did not wait until the following month to meet again, and their third meeting took place in Waterloo this time. Castiel had invited him to dinner at a restaurant he called "the best in town" and Dean could not possibly say no to the prospect of a good meal.

March hosted their first meeting in a private place. Dean had taken care to clean up the mess from top to bottom before Castiel rang his doorbell and, seeing the huge bouquet of flowers that his friend had brought him, an easy smile spread over his face. Easy. It was the right word to define Castiel. Everything was easy with him, obvious and sweet. He never judged him, no matter what topic of conversation he decided to share with him. Castiel listened and supported and Dean had not felt so free and understood since at least 6 months now. One evening, he even wildly wondered if Sam’s heart had not completely taken possession of Castiel to make him this radiant and exceptional person. Until then, Dean had never known anyone but his brother who could read him like an open book.

In April and several appointments later, however, Dean understood that it was not really a fraternal connection he shared with Castiel. He learned to dwell more on the looks and gestures exchanged. Everything was crazy, insane, but once again, everything had always been crazy between them, and this from the first day.

May marked the beginning of a mental breakdown for Dean. He was definitely falling in love with his now best friend and that terrified him. What if he was wrong? What if the fear of losing sight of the only thing that still connected him to his deceased brother led him to feel faked feelings for Castiel? He had no right to be wrong here, he could not make his friend suffer, for he was too stubborn and miserable to properly analyze his own feelings. His cowardice pushed him away from Castiel — "to avoid making him suffer," he said — and the deep despair that this created in each of them was almost as hard as a second mourning. Almost.

Despite his best efforts not to hurt his best friend, June began with a considerable argument. Castiel felt rightfully unfairly rejected, and Dean could not bring himself to pronounce the words that burned his throat. However, neither of them expressed themselves more when Castiel, after a final overwhelming exclamation, brutally kissed Dean’s lips. The latter greeted him with a sob before deepening their kiss. No, Dean did not only love that beating heart in his chest… He had fallen in love with so much more.

July and August passed at an alarming speed as each of the two men discovered another facet of the other. Castiel had met Dean’s parents and Dean had not seen his mother so happy for a long time now. However, the one-year date of Sam’s accident was fast approaching and Dean could not ignore the weight it added to his shoulders. Little by little, Sam’s heart had become Castiel’s one in his eyes and his boyfriend was gradually filling the void that he felt deep inside him, but this dammed month of September was now taunting him every day on the calendar.

"Would you like to put your head against my chest?" Castiel once proposed as they both prepare to go to bed.

Dean froze, air jammed in his lungs.

"What?" He asked, stunned. He wasn’t sure if he heard correctly.

Castiel smiled softly, as always, before taking his hand in his.

"Just tonight." He replied, as if that explains everything.

And without really understanding how, Dean nodded and lay down with Castiel. Docilely, he had let his companion draw him to himself until his ear rested against the scar of his chest. Some breathing later, Dean was able to discern the beats under the mutilated skin and the world stopped spinning. He remained there for hours, his eyes open but lost in nostalgia and stifling emotion. He was alive and well, determined not to disappear. Not this time. When Dean began to cry silently, Castiel simply hugged him harder to comfort him, without a word. This was so precious to him. It quickly became their favorite position, Dean kissing the scar whenever he could.

September passed by in a bitter sweet atmosphere that neither Dean nor Castiel regretted sharing together. One evening in October, bundled up under the duvet to fight off a new winter, Dean could not take his eyes off the blue gaze smiling back. He thought of what his last months had been, what he had lost, but also what he had found. In front of him, Castiel squeezed the hand on his chest while breathing the same warm air as his partner. Their heart rate was calm and painless.

"I love you." Dean huffed at the bend of another tender smile.

At his words, Dean felt Castiel’s heart miss a beat under his palm and maybe, just maybe, was this the way his brother told him how happy he was for him.

* * * @winchester-reload

I hope you enjoyed it! I would really like to develop other moments like their first meeting or the evolution of their friendship until they become a couple. However, I had only one day to write and I had to make choices :). I am proud of this work but also rather doubtful of the final result so, if you liked it, please take the time to leave me a quick review in the comments. It would mean a lot to me. Thanks again for reading to the end, see you tomorrow!

You can find the whole series on Ao3

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[elletromil]

Soulmate alphabet: heartbeats! For fuba, please. XD

So quick note, there will definitely be more to this, but I can’t quite manage to write the last part so I’m posting this already very long 1st part and hopefully sleeping on it will bring me to an ending I am pleased with.

I hope you still enjoy this tho :D *casually ducks from any flying shoes*

Heart skipped a beat

Zhang Rishan has always been praised for how disciplined he is, how calm.

Even in dangerous situations, he keeps a level-hea about him, never lets himself grow frightened, or loses himself to panic.

And while it’s to be expected for a military man such as himself, his training has very little to do with. Just like him being a Zhang only plays a small part in his temperament.

No, the reason he’s so good at keeping his heartbeat under control is quite simple.

His soulmate already makes it go off rhythm often enough for both of them.

It should feel off-putting, having his heart fluttering and skipping beats without any rhyme nor reason, but in reality, it’s anything but.

It means that his soulmate -- whoever they might be, wherever they are -- his soulmate is lively. Either because they’re a nervous person or just excitable, though Rishan suspects both are true.

He’s not even met his soulmate yet, but he is already deeply intrigued about how different they are to each other. He hopes that his soulmate finds his steady heartbeat just as soothing as Rishan finds the wild rhythms comforting.

It's proof that he is never alone, not truly.

This is why he aims to be as calm as possible in any situation.

Just so he can focus on the fluttering of his heartbeat and feel close to his soulmate.

*

When he was younger, Tiezui really tried to be considerate.

But the world was just so exciting and scary and he can admit not that he was a somewhat spoiled child. While he knew all about soulmates sharing heartbeats, he didn’t really understand what it meant.

After all, how can someone understand what they’ve never experienced?

To this day, anytime the subject is brought up in his presence, he merely smiles and offers a few non-committing words before excusing himself from the discussion as soon as possible.

The disapproving looks he’s always been at the end of for being so passionate about everything all the time are one thing to withstand.

He doesn’t know if he could cope with the pity and contempt people would surely have for him if they realised he doesn’t have a soulmate to inconvenience with his heartbeat.

That there’s no one out there that would complement him. No one who would always stand by him, no matter what.

No one to share his emotions with.

He’ll never know if his soulmate died young or if he simply never had one. He doesn’t let himself think too much about it. What good would it do? One way or the other, the result is the same.

He’s alone. Always has been, always will be.

Some would be bothered by it, but Tiezui is rather used to solitude.

And if sometimes it grows too quiet for him, well, he has plenty of friends and acquaintances to get into arguments with and the world is filled with enough wonders and terrors to get his blood pumping.

It’s not because he’s the only one with control over his heartbeat that he’s any less alive.

That he doesn’t matter.

***

The first time Rishan meets Ba Ye, he doesn’t think much of the man. He knows that Fo Ye cares for him and that’s all he needs to know.

And then Ba Ye starts talking, gesturing with his whole body. The other man has so much energy that Rishan cannot help but be fascinated.

Then comes the respect.

Ba Ye is easily scared and jittery, though in their line of work, one can never be too cautious. However, even when he complains loudly about it, he always goes above and beyond to help Fo Ye.

Such loyalty is highly commendable in Rishan’s opinion.

Fondness is next.

At first, Rishan wouldn’t say they are friends.

But Tiezui treats him like one anyway. Berates him and bickers with him like he does all his closest acquaintances. It could have been annoying, but it’s simply exhilarating.

A battle of wits with Ba Ye is a challenge that Rishan has as much fun winning as he has losing. When Fo Ye doesn’t grow tired of their antics and puts an end to it himself.

It takes him a shamefully long time to realise how Ba Ye’s emotional state reflects so perfectly the way his own heart beats within his chest.

But once he does, falling in love with him is simply unavoidable.

Not all soulmates are romantic, Rishan knows it.

That’s why he doesn’t pursue it.

Ba Ye has never shown any interest in romance, not as long as Rishan has known him. But that’s okay.

It’s a privilege to have found his soulmate at all. Counting himself among Ba Ye’s close friends is nothing short of an honor.

To put it simply, Rishan only feels grateful for his luck.

*

Tiezui is drawn to Zhang Rishan as soon as they are introduced.

There’s something about his quasi-eerie calmness that only makes Tiezui wants to mess with him. Not in a mean way, though. Just to find out what it takes to get a rise out of him, what breaks the lieutenant’s apparent coldness.

And yes, Tiezui won’t lie and pretend that part of his fascination with the man doesn’t come from the fact that he is, to put it simply, handsome.

But it wouldn’t have mattered if Zhang Rishan had turned out to be an obnoxious bore or a complete moron. Not that he isn’t a bit of an idiot sometimes, but no one is perfect.

The important thing is that he is a decent man and a loyal friend. He’s patient and welcoming. He’s not so easily impressed, but respects everyone until they give him a reason not to.

He also gives as good as he gets and never seems to grow tired of their bickering.

Even Fo Ye and Er Ye usually can only take so much of Tiezui’s chattering before they indicate he should cut it off a bit.

That never happens with Rishan.

After a while, Rishan even starts to seek Tiezui’s company.

Before he knows it, Tiezui rarely has a moment to himself anymore. Rishan has fitted himself into his life seamlessly.

Tiezui still doesn’t mind being alone. But quickly, his favourite times of the week become those when they are working quietly in the same room, each on their own thing.

Whenever Rishan is in the room with him, the calm rhythm of his heartbeat never bothers him. It only feels like one more thing they share together. One more element of connection between them.

He wonders sometimes if Rishan might love him back. Though to be honest, he’s quite convinced that he does.

But he can’t bring himself to ask.

Even if they’ve never talked about soulmates together, Tiezui knows that Rishan has one. The man has never shied away from the subject when asked by others and people love to speculate as to whom it might be, if he’s even met them yet.

Yes, not all soulmates are romantic. But Tiezui cannot imagine a world where he could compete with one, even if they ended up just being friends with Rishan.

It’s best to enjoy what he has while it lasts. And when the time comes, he’ll just be happy Rishan will never have to know the disappointment that comes with having no one to share your heart with.

--

Prompt me about soulmates

[anystalker707]

I’m always yours

Pairing: Gerard Way x Reader Genre: Fluff Word count: 2 338 Requested by @thunderpurple (who apparently got their account deactivated, but I hope they read it anyways) Summary: Reader is a famous singer who dates Gerard and writes a song about their relationship.

"What are you smiling about?" The sudden question pulls me away from my thoughts. I hum questioningly at first – Gerard's curious face is the first thing I process, eyes flickering over me in an attempt of understanding what's in my mind. He sits on the couch across from mine, his elbow over the couch's arm while he supports his chin on his palm.

"Oh," I say when finally understanding the question, adjusting my position – with the motion, my pen almost falls from my lap, but I'm able to catch it. "Erm, nothing," I answer with a smirk, raising my eyebrows lightly, demonstrating I'm just not telling him about it. Certain frustration hits me as I look down at my notebook – it seems like half of the ideas I believed to have written down didn't even leave my mind.

Gerard doesn't seem like he's giving up soon, furrowing his eyebrows as pouting lightly. "Is it about me? You've been observing me way too much." He stands up from the couch to sit down beside me, but I close the notebook and set it between me and the armrest before he does so. "That's not fair," he complains, eyeing the notebook with furrowed eyebrows.

"Yes, it is," I chuckle and place a kiss on his cheek. "I love it when you're sulky, you get all cute. Not like you're not cute normally, but you get it," I smile, watching him try to put on an angry look, but he ends up blushing. I can't help but to chuckle again, pulling him for a kiss.

"Agh, ew, no fucking on the couch." A sudden voice says and we pull away to see Frank opening the fridge – and most likely having entered the bus without us having noticed.

I roll my eyes with a small lazy smirk, deciding to joke, "you don't even know what happens when you're not around."

"And I'll be happy if it continues this way." He takes a bottle of water in hand, shooting us a playfully reprehending look as making his way out of the bus again; Gerard and I laugh at him.

"Aren't you going to tell me what're you doing?" His head rests on my shoulder as Gerard looks at me from under his lashes. Grinning, I shake my head. He sighs, defeated, and adjusts his posture. "Okay then," Gerard shrugs nonchalantly before leaning in for another kiss.

He must think he's very smart, doesn't he? I can feel the exact moment his hand reaches for the notebook, but I immediately slap it away, shooting him a look once breaking the kiss. "The more you try to see it," I tell him, narrowing my eyes, "the less I'm convinced to show it to you. You'll find out soon enough." With last peck is pressed to his lips, I grabbing the notebook, planning to leave it back in my bus.

"You're no fun," Gerard presses a kiss to my cheek.

"I'm not supposed to be," I tease, standing up and reaching for his hand. "C'mon, I changed my mind, I was just gonna leave this in the bus and come back, but we're not continuing inside here. I want to stretch my legs and I'm tired of staring at a TV or at the wall, the bus makes me feel suffocated." I chuckle seeing him roll his eyes, though agreeing. Maybe some time together will help me having an inspiration.

We grab a coffee from the café of the gas station and take a seat on the concrete step in front of the convenience store, observing the cars passing by. It's quite peaceful – the sun already set itself, so the sky has this golden shade in the horizon, slowly fading into a grayish blue which contrasts perfectly with the clouds, which still have a pink tinge. A stronger breeze hits once in a while, making a few of Gerard's strands cover his face – he hooks them behind his ear just for another breeze to send them flying again. The frustrated grunt he releases makes me chuckle.

"Wait, don't move," I say as getting my phone off my pocket. Doing as said, he hums questioningly. "You look beautiful, all aesthetic," I saw as opening the camera app, taking a few pictures of him. He furrows his eyebrows a bit in a wordless complain, but doesn't do anything to stop me either. Once I lower my phone, he nods towards it as if asking to see the pics.

"Ah, no, wait a minute," I say, changing the camera to the frontal one and moving closer to him – leans in, his cheek brushing mine as I snap another couple of photos. "Imma post these of us later," I hand him the phone to see the pics like he asked earlier, leaning a bit closer to him to see it too.

"Not the others too?" He asks curiously, returning the phone.

"Nah," I shake my head, "these are for personal archive." His scoff makes me grin. "I don't share every pic I take of you, Gee," I let my cup on the ground to be able to hug Gerard, pecking the side of his face. "I can't expose too much what's mine, even more with so many people wanting too," I mutter against his skin, the corners of my lips curling up into a smile seeing him blush – knowing I can make him blush is just amazing.

He hums softly in a mockingly judging tone, turning his face so his lips meet mine. "You do a great job," Gerard mutters on my lips before locking them in a short, sweet kiss. "But don't worry, whether near or far, I'm always yours."

~

Besides blood, lot of thoughts flood my head as sit upside down on the couch, looking at the nothing. Gerard needed to do whatever, so, with him away, it's the best time to try to write this song. I just want it to be a surprise.

Ray approaches, eyeing me curiously before taking a seat too, about a foot away from me and my guitar – which's actually Frank's, one he lent me earlier. "Why are you sitting like this, kid? For how long have you been like this? You'll pass out." Certain concern is mixed with his confusion, though most of his attention is turned to the phone in his hand.

"'Waiting for inspiration to come." I say as sitting upright again. The room spins under my gaze for a second, but it quickly goes back to normal since it hadn't been long since I had decided to sit like that. "I'm writing a new song," I explain, taking the guitar back on my lap again. "It feels like all my ideas slip away just because I need one then, when I notice, I'm just staring at a white paper waiting for the ideas to show up, y'know?"

Ray chuckles a bit as glancing at me, his curls moving as he nods. "I understand completely. Good luck, tho," he shoots me a smile.

"Thanks," I smile back, playing on the guitar what I've written until now. Turns out I end up finally finding an idea and, getting too engaged on writing the song, I just notice how late it is when the Gerard and Mikey are walking back inside the bus.

"Don't you have your own bus?" Mikey asks playfully, nudging my foot with his before sitting down across from Ray and I.

"Ah, sometimes I forget I do," I set my guitar laying on my lap as throwing my arms over my head to stretch myself. "But I wasn't supposed to be here yet, I just got too carried away..." Seeing Gerard's hand furtively reaching for my notes again makes me interrupt myself, slapping his hand away. "You're so stubborn!" I furrow my eyebrows at him, shooting him a look as standing up.

The guitar is left in a corner, against the wall, and I sigh dramatically, my notebook safely hugged close to myself, "how Mikey's being so rude, I'm already leaving. 'Hope y'all have fun without my illustrious presence, then." My words make Mikey and Ray hum or scoff sarcastically – I throw my nose in the air while walking away, stopping in the last moment to look back and laugh with them.

"Let me go with you," Gerard says as following me, taking my hand in his. He blushes lightly at the peck I give him before we continue walking.

By the time the tour is over, the song is completely perfected – with a little fixing here and there in the lyrics, melody and adding a few other instruments. I smile as listening to the final result, all happy about it. Today completes exact five years since I met Gerard – I remember clearly internally freaking out when meeting him and the calls until four in the morning we started having not long later – so it's obviously the best day to release the song.

I'm anxious about posting it, mostly about Gerard's reaction; I never told him what was the song about and when I was releasing it. Breathing in deeply and exhaling to make myself calmer, I decide to finally post the announcement of the single. First on Twitter, then on Instagram, both with the same caption – I've been working on this song for a long time; it was difficult summing up in five minutes everything (or almost everything) between me and the love of my life, but here it is.

I bite back a grin as placing the phone inside the pocket of my hoodie – that's actually Gerard's, but I'll just return it when it doesn't smell like him anymore and grab another, maybe one of his green jackets – and look for Gerard around the house.

Gerard's in the kitchen when I find him, preparing himself a mug of coffee. Not saying anything, I simply observe, quietly moving to the counter, leaning forward with my hands on the cold surface. He takes a quick glance at first before looking at me properly, humming quietly in acknowledge to my presence. Grabbing his mug, he gives me a peck on the lips in his way out of the kitchen.

He's most likely returning to his office, since there's where he was when I last checked, not long ago. I wait for a moment before following him, but I find him in the living room and wait until he goes up the stairs. Again, after a moment, I'm already after him, however, I almost jump three feet in the air when turning around the corner and seeing Gerard there – he eyes me unamused, sipping on his coffee.

"Why are you following me?" He asks, narrowing his eyes.

I blush, playing with the hem of the hoodie's sleeve. "Ah, um," I think for a moment. "It's a big house," I shrug, remembering the excuse he gives when following me around my house or his own – he always walks in the room about a minute later and blushes, getting all fidgety, when finding me staring at the doorway, waiting for him with a knowing look. "I feel alone...?" It ends up sounding more like a question and I try to crack a convincing grin in the end.

He chuckles softly as stepping closer, pressing a peck to my lips, leaving behind the bitter taste of coffee. "You can stay in the office too, y'know," he raises an eyebrow at me, nodding towards the said room. "I also enjoy your company."

I'm about to agree when it suddenly comes to my mind – maybe he'll check his phone when getting back there and I don't want to be around, watching his reaction to the song. "Ah," I look away, stepping back again, "no, actually, I'm fine," I force a grin, ignoring his questioning gaze. "I'll go watch something on the TV."

Before Gerard can question me, I'm already turning around and going down the stairs, throwing myself on the couch once in the living room. The TV ends up turning into just another detail in the background, losing my attention to my phone as I read the comments on the new song.

There are these hate comments as always – most of them are attacking me about for just wanting to use Gerard and MCR, which simply doesn't make sense since I was already famous before meeting them and our relationship didn't come out to the public until about a year ago.

People started suspecting about it and the media was also annoying a lot, trying to figure out the truth. So, in an interview to MCR and I before a concert I was opening for them, when the interviewer asked us about it, I just kissed Gerard in front of the camera and walked away. I remember how Gerard just shrugged at the guy and followed me while Frank watched with a grin – he had already figured out about us by himself – and Mikey and Ray stood there containing amused smiles.

The comments do make me feel bad sometimes, but I believe people would like it to be in my place, so I try to not bother too much. There are the people who actually like me, above all, and who support us together. Not like we need their approval, but that's it.

Arms being wrapped around me suddenly pull me away from my thoughts – I blush as coming back to reality and remembering everything, shrinking a bit while Gerard covers my face with kisses. "Gerard!" I say through a chuckle, in a reprehending tone, interrupted when a last kiss is pressed to my lips.

"You're the best," he says, kissing me deeply before giving me a chance to answer. "I love you so much, you make me feel so special, you're literally the best thing that ever happened to me." Once again, he kisses me.

As much as the kiss is good, I pull away a few seconds later to answer. I grin sheepishly, "you too, Gee, I love you too."

[colour-outside-the-liness]

First of all!! Loved the MoU fic update! left you a comment on AO3 and all. 10/10 ratings haha.

Secondly, moving countries is great you should try if you ever get a chance. I've always wanted to do that and jumped in on the first opportunity I got to make that dream come true, and I recgozine how lucky I am to be able to do so. It's definitely not easy but I'd do it again if I could (in true sag fashion 😎 haha). Where would you want to live? You ever been outside the UK?

Hahaha you and I in a team would be a nightmare to play against I think. Oh come on you absolutely do not deserve people questioning your intelligence! I like to play dumb in addition to the taunting so people underestimate me, they never see it coming when I win. They never see the cheating coming either, my friends are always shocked when they find out, but I do it almost every single time! 😂 I'm competitive too but I like to play it cool especially If I lose I'll be like "it's just a game calm down yall" but if I win I'm like "in your face losers!" (very mature I know).

I love your drunken story, though does sound like it was very dangerous so I'm glad nothing bad happened to you two! Ah I love yalls nordern accent (me and everyone in this fandom 😂) haha your friend's sense of humor is golden.👌 I'm glad you enjoyed my worst drunken experience, that was the last time I did something like that, I felt bad bc my best friend had to take care of me the whole night and you're right she should've told me it was just a rock! Lucky you you didn't get a hangover the day after, I certainly regretted drinking too much that night however fun it might have been haha.

Like I said before your niece is a really cool kid haha I'm glad you have someone to talk to about Bly Manor, don't know anyone who watches the show and my friends don't like scary stuff so I have to talk to myself about it 😂 and now you! Thank you for entertaining me ;) and I only watch the parts I really like now, I'm tired of crying every time I watch the whole show haha.

Do you do random accents really badly like Dani too? 😂 it is kinda funny your mom said it like that yeah hahaha maybe she just meant the good bits? And I mean, do you think you need help? Lol

I have a sneak peek of that damie fanart here, don't think I'll ever finish it tho. I want to do a medieval AU inspired fanart. Maybe it will also inspire someone to pick up the idea and write it haha.

How's your weekend been so far? My neighbor is making me watch Grey's Anatomy season (???) 500 idk but I wish I was reading that pirate AU instead 😂

Awwh thank you so much!! I will get around to replying to the comment on AO3 tomorrow when I reply to the others I've had a very busy day today though so haven't even had chance to read any comments yet but thank you so much for giving it a 10/10!! I wanna do it as soon as I get chance but I know it's gonna be hard and that I am gonna need a bit more money behind me first but I definitely wanna do it when I can... yeah I've been out of the UK twice- one time I went to France for the weekend when I was doing my A Levels and was like 17 the college I was studying at took some of the art kids and since I was doing a photography A Level I got to go and then a couple of years ago I went to LA for a few weeks which was great but I've never been out of the UK for longer than that!! A nightmare for everyone else but it would be hilarious for us I just know it would haha... I sometimes do I have said some dumb things, I actually used one of my dumber moments as a funny little story in one of my fics- people still laugh at me now for what I said and it's been 10 years... my roommate will not let me live it down!! See surprising people that way is always brilliant like when people just expect you to lose and then you win? That's the best kind of win in my eyes!! I don't cheat at games I am just ridiculously competitive and can't stand losing unless it's something like a video game I am okay with losing those but board games I can't stand losing and I am also a terrible winner my roommate won't play games with me anymore!! I can't say anything about anyone being that kind of a winner because I know I am and one of my sister's is terrible too we literally make a song and dance over winning Oh it was so dangerous and we were so dumb to do it like anything could've happened and we both sit and look back at that and go "man we were dumb" but I also sit and go "oh my god she's gonna be a mum in like 4 months" because we've done some crazy / stupid stuff!! My roommate is without a doubt one of the funniest people I have ever met and she's not afraid to tell it how it is... I'll admit because I have a Northern accent Jamie is like the only character on Bly Manor to not have an accent to me so when I hear people talking about her accent I'm always a little like "what?" Because to me that's just how people talk around here haha I did enjoy your drunken story and honestly we've all been there I have had to be taken care of on more than one occasion for being too drunk like to the point of people having to help me into my pyjamas and everything I've been in some bad ways haha!! She should've definitely told you it was just a rock and not a turtle!! Yeah I've only had one hangover and that was after a night of drinking where I blacked out and don't remember any of the night!! Yeah the night of the drinking is always fun- the hangover isn't though and often makes you wonder if it was worth it haha She's so cool like genuinely just a cool and funny kid and she just asks all the questions about shows she's watched so with me its Bly Manor with her mum and dad it's Stranger Things she asked me about it once but I had to tell her I'd never watched it she didn't seem impressed but yeah I'll talk to her about Bly Manor any day of the week- and you too now honestly I will talk about it to anyone that will listen... I can't not watch it all if I watch it because there's just so much about it that I love even if it makes me cry... episodes 4,6, and 8 are my favourites though and are probably the ones I have watched the most!! Yeah I do random accents all the time and they're always terrible but I always find myself really funny- I had this friend at Uni that had a slight southern English accent because he had spent most of his childhood there before moving up north and he still said certain words in a southern accent and I used to do his accent all the time but it was always terrible!! Oh yeah my mum is pretty blunt with stuff like she'll say things sometimes without thinking about how it sounds that or she just doesn't care like she's said

somethings haha I am sure she did mean the Dani thing in a nice way though because she said she liked her- Dani and Owen were her favourites and I mean some help for me wouldn't be a terrible thing I'll admit haha That fan art is incredible!! Like seriously amazing!! I would love to see some medieval fan art for Damie!! I have been sent a few medieval prompts for Damie and I have started writing some of them but it's taking time to actually get full chapters together but once I have and once I have more time from wrapping up other WIPs I'll make a start on editing and uploading those because medieval stuff is always great!! It's been good thank so far today I went to a little beach town with my mum, 2 of my sisters their partners and two of my nieces (my cool niece was one of them… not that my other niece isn’t cool but you know what I mean) and me, my two brother in laws, and my nieces all played a game of crazy golf while my mum and sisters went to a cafe and had cups of tea... they didn't wanna play with us but we still had fun while we played (I came second which I was very happy with)!! I hope you enjoy Grey's Anatomy and that you get chance to read the pirate AU soon!! It's soo good!! ☺️