#honestly i wish i was on here when people were actively doing them

[polaris-stuff]

Okay, this is the fourth time of me rewriting this comment.

And i am gonna try and keep it short ( I failed I am so sorry) . As this is about the Heart to Heart with earth.

Feel free to ignore this if you don't wanna talk about it anymore. If you said something about , I've been trying to put my feelings on this out for a while and it's just not working. (it's also now 4 am, )

I came away from the episode feeling like it was a good episode. Where the characters talked about why they were deciding not to help moon for different reasons.

I thought for most of them it was in character, even if I don't fully agree. I could see what the show was trying to do.

And then i see a lot of people agreeing and being really hurt by the episode. Because they feel like everyone is aboning moon. And leaving him in this vulnerable space.

I feel like i missed something. As to me. the celestial family isn't fully aware as to truly how bad Moon's mental state has gotten.

I have a feeling that (Sun and Lunar, more so then earth) Are taking moon's last words as face value ( wanting to bring solar back for ego/selfish reasons, and not because he truly breaking down)

(I also think monty still hasn't fully filled them in either that moon seems to be thinking he isn't real but I could be wrong!)

I think they'd be behaving otherwise if they know the true depts. they wouldn't wich is why this sucks so much. Moon is driving people away, actively sabotaging his own help.

I sit here wishing i would understand that hurt. I honestly truly do. Maybe because i have the feeling that they will help even if they say now they won't

maybe because i really hope sun isn't gonna make the same mistake as moon.

Maybe i am i giving sun, lunar and earth to much credit, and to many excuses.

I think...in the end. I don't think them refusing to help moon. Is them trying to hurt moon (even if that is the outcome) . But is taking care of themselves as they are all also still not in a good place?

And maybe because i genuinely can't see what they can do for moon to help him. As they offered him help but he refused or actively lied on how he was doing. So I don't get what help people want them to provide for moon at this moment. ( besides not leaving, but can you be there for someone that doesn't want you there?)

I dunno if i am making sense. trying to talk my feelings out is always hard. And I think for the first time I am on the other side of most of the people I usually agree with and respect a lot ( you being one of them ) . So I feel a bit lost and weird about it as to why my view is so different.

( I am honestly hoping Sun will see Moon having hallucinations, and at least will set something up so moon is never alone in that cell like he was. I feel like he thinks, he first needs to stop moon. And then when that is done. He can actively think on what to do next cause offering help first ain't gonna do it)

I am sorry for leaving this long ass comment in your inbox. I truly hope It didn't come off as attacking. AS it wasn't meant to be. Just a fellow TSAMS fan. who was in their own way very confused and hurt i guess and feels a bit alone in their reading of the story?

And trying to understand why people see this a an attack from the celestial family on moon. Or a active decision...instead of .. a series of what is gonna be a slew of bad decisions from everyone involved.

-Noffy.

Alright, I understand your point of view, don't worry about it, and actually, this is a YT series on VRchat so I shouldn't be so mad about this either yk JAJA

Ok, the thing is, the family doesn't know what's happening to Moon, that's right, they have no way of knowing what's happening to him because Moon pushed them all away and lied to them, now, the thing is that Earth knows. Monty told Earth that Moon had a psychosis episode and found him hitting the ground, that Moon could no longer tell what was real from what wasn't, so Earth knows that Moon is in a HORRIBLE mental state. And idk, but if you know that a person is in a state where they can no longer perceive reality correctly, I don't think the best response is not to help them.

Also, I'll highlight Lunar going from "I really don't care" (although he should care, we're talking about Moon, one of his brothers) to "fuck him" which is just weird?? The whole family was with Lunar and supported him when the thing with Eclipse happened but Lunar just does not care when something happens to another family member ??

I'm 100% sure that Sun will help Moon, it's more than obvious that Moon will get out of this situation, but the way the family is handling it is so strange to me. Lunar, Earth and Sun have every right to not want to continue dealing with problems but this is also partly their fault.

Since Solar died no one was with Moon because "Moon was busy", so Moon was alone in P&S with Ruin whispering in his ear and only Lunar went to see him a couple of times. Sun began to hang out more with Earth and Lunar, and Moon was left completely alone. "Oh, but Moon never said he wanted them to come with him! They can't read minds!" Yes, and that's true, but If everyone was aware that Moon and Solar were basically running around together every day, and everyone was aware that Moon was the one who had the worst reaction to Solar's death, the logical thing to do is to spend at least a couple of hours with him, right?

And yes, Moon lied about how he felt so this is also partly his fault for wanting to hide what was happening to him. But Monty is also to blame because he also hide it.

We are at a point where we have been shown that all the hallucinations that Moon has had are created by her consciousness out of guilt (in the same way as Sun when the BM thing happened), Moon regrets the things he said to Earth, Moon wants to stop, Moon wants to go home and apologize, but he can't. He thinks his whole family hates him, that no one wants him in daycare.

Also, I understand that Earth is hurt but she also isn't trying to understand Moon's feelings now that she knows everything Moon has been going through. Now she knows that Moon is going through the worst time of her life and she just decides not to do anything about it because "Moon said a couple of hurtful things to her." (things Sun warned Moon would say to push her away and things that worked).

I feel like of all the people, the only one who has a little more reason here is Sun, and, interestingly, Jack and the computer, who have done more than Earth and Lunar.

I think that now that he is locked up and unable to teleport it is a good opportunity for everyone to talk to him, a really serious and good intervention.

Sorry for the long text! And thanks for the ask and support! It really helped me let off some steam, hehe

[spinnysocks]

old lion guard rp blogs my beloved

[ellecdc]

Dude, I read the one where you talked about pregnant reader and you said it'll be a cute fic.... are you really gonna write it!!? Poly moonwater with pregnant reader!?? Will you? Will you? Will you!!?? Please, will you!!!!!???

well.....since you asked so nicely........👀

poly!moonwater x afab fem!reader who finds out she's expecting

CW: mentions of pregnancy, how people get pregnant (nothing discussed in detail, SFW and minors), reader is concerned the boys will leave her, reader wishes to keep the pregnancy, based off a discussion on this post.

Now that you knew, you weren’t sure how you could honestly feel surprised. In fact, now you were kind of surprised that it hadn’t happened sooner. 

For all the claims that wizardingkind makes to be ahead of the curve in comparison to muggles, they don’t exactly have the best contraceptives. 

Potions are fine if you remember to take them, the same can be said about charms, and condoms are a foreign concept to the likes of wizarding society.

You’d been feeling so incredibly exhausted lately, and it had gotten to the point that you couldn’t make it through the day without having at least one nap. It was when you’d actually fallen asleep at the dinner table that Regulus started to fret, though Remus found it terribly funny at the time. 

Then came the aches and pains that never seemed to dull no matter what you did. You’d tried potions, over the counter muggle medications, hot baths, cold showers, lying flat, sitting up – nothing stopped the aches that seemed intent on plaguing you. Remus had even given you full body massages that, whilst absolutely heavenly, did absolutely fuck all. 

“Maybe you’re coming down with something?” He’d queried, holding the back of his hand to your head. “Reg? Can you bring me the thermometer?”

You swore you heard whatever Regulus had been fussing with in the kitchen fall unceremoniously onto the counter in his haste to come over to you.

“Why? Is she poorly?” He asked severely, placing the back of his hand against your head like Remus had, only far more aggressively and to the point that it actually made a slapping sound as it made contact.

“Och, babe! If she wasn’t poorly yet she’ll surely have a concussion now!” Remus chided, pushing Regulus’ hand away and cradling your head protectively to his chest.

Needless to say, the thermometer didn’t pick up a fever either. 

So, when you woke up the next morning and spent most of the day hunched over the toilet bowl, Reg insisted you see a Healer.

Once the Healer started to ask the more...pointed questions, the pieces all started to click together in your mind.

Are you sexually active? Yes.

When was your last menstrual cycle? They weren’t exactly regular so... you supposed it had been late.

Any nausea? Yes.

Fatigue. Uh-huh.

Body or muscle pain? Fuckin’ hells.

So now you were standing outside of yours, Remus', and Regulus’ shared flat with a copy of your test results in your hand wondering what in the buggering fuck you were going to do now.

Both Regulus and Remus were pretty set on not wanting children of their own. They loved children, and they were both really good with children (in their own, very different ways); but with Regulus’ past, his family's reputation, and “the sodding inbreeding, amour; I’d be surprised if it didn’t come out with everything upside down and backwards”, he was sure that it’d be better for everyone if he stayed childless.

And Remus.

Poor, sweet Remus.

Too ashamed of his own affliction to a) pass it onto his own biological child or b) force any child to live with the knowledge that they had a ‘monster’ for a father.

And that was that.

Children just wasn’t in the cards for you three.

Yet here you were...

Suddenly, you weren’t just worried; you were terrified.

They didn’t want this, they never wanted this. They had always been clear about that. They could have been more careful to prevent this, but here you were.

Here you were.

There you stood; outside of your shared flat, unable to bring yourself to open the door.

They were going to leave you; they’d leave you, surely. Yeah?

They didn’t want this.

They wouldn’t want you. 

Fuck.

“For the love of Circe, I’m jus- Salazar’s saggy balls, Y/N!” Regulus said as he stumbled in the doorway, startled after having been in the middle of shouting something over his shoulder only to nearly collide with you. “How long have you been standing out here?”

You stared dumbly at him; you weren’t ready to go inside. You weren’t ready to have this conversation.

Too bad.

“Not long?” You stated in the form of a question. He furrowed his brows and looked you up and down before offering you his hand up the two steps to your doorway. 

“I was just opening the doors and windows; you’re lovely boyfriend tried to make us dinner.” He explained with a fond eyeroll, stepping into the flat and squinting through the smoke flooding the living space.

“Yeah, yeah. Last time I try something new in the kitchen.” Remus muttered as he threw away an entire baking dish.

“What was it supposed to be again, sweetheart?” Regulus asked with a mischievous smirk you knew he picked up from spending too much time with Remus, Sirius, and James.

“Just never you mind, you tosser. Hi dove.” He muttered to Regulus, though his tone changed dramatically once he turned to you, his eyes softening as he took in your form.

“How was your appointment?”

Your appointment? Your appointment. The appointment you just had. The appointment where you found out. The appointment where you were told you were pregnant. That appointment. The appointment you were still holding the slip for. The slip with your results. The slip with your pregnancy test results. The slip with your positive pregnancy test results.

That appointment.

“I-”

And you took off to the bathroom, slammed the door behind you and heaved into the toilet. 

There was a gentle knock on the door as you sat back against the tub with your knees to your chest, trying to catch your breath. “Dove?”

Another knock.

“Okay, we’re coming in.” Came Regulus’ more authoritarian voice through the door before it slowly opened to allow both of them entrance.

Remus had to fold himself a number of times in order to sit on the bathroom floor beside you whilst Reg flushed the toilet (while you flushed in embarrassment) and closed the lid to sit on it, facing you and Remus. 

“Did you get any answers from the healer?” Regulus asked quietly.

You smothered a humourless scoff and nodded your head in the affirmative. 

The boys let you sit there with your head laid back onto the edge of the tub and your eyes closed before Regulus couldn’t seem to handle it anymore.

“And? Are you... okay?”

You took in a deep breath and pulled that paper - now crumpled within your fist - cast a gemino duplication spell on it and handed one to each boy. 

You curled yourself inward and rested your forehead on your knees, reminding yourself to breathe even though you knew these two men now knew that you were expecting, that you were expecting their child. 

It could have been moments, or it could have been hours; but it was Remus who broke the silence.

“Pregnant?” He whispered on an exhale.

You cautiously raised your head to look over at him by your side, noticing that his eyes were shining with unshed tears.

You brought him to tears.

He never wanted this.

He wouldn’t want you.

“You’re really pregnant?” He asked again.

You nodded and swallowed around your gag reflex; unsure whether the nausea was nerves or...pregnancy related.

“You’re...” Reg started, still looking down at the paper in his hands. “You’re... gonna have a baby?” He whispered in awe.

You felt your brows furrow when you heard an emotional chuckle from beside you.

You turned back to see Remus wiping tears away from his eyes as he looked back down at his own paper in front of him.

“We’re gonna have a baby?” Remus corrected, nudging Regulus’ calf with his foot.

“Wait, you... you guys aren’t upset?” You asked urgently. Both boys snapped to attention to look at you in various degrees of worry or horror.

“Upset!?” Remus gawked as Regulus started shaking his head emphatically.

“Why? Why would you be worried of such a thing?”

You shook your own head and looked down at your hands as you began picking at your nailbeds. “Neither of you were ever interested in having kids of your own.” 

“Oh, dovey.” Remus cooed and quickly pulled you into his side. “When was the last time we talked about this, huh? When we first graduated Hogwarts? I think we could manage a kid now, yeah?”

“Or four.” Regulus added, causing you and Remus to straighten up significantly.

“Four!?” You and Remus chorused.

“Since when did you want kids?” You questioned incredulously.

“The moment I saw you hold Harry for the first time.” He answered without hesitation. 

“Ha ha.” Remus taunted. “Mine was watching her shop for Lily’s baby shower.” 

“What!?” You nearly screeched.

Regulus sighed before ultimately moving to sit on the floor on your other side; you knew this was very serious considering he was a notorious germ freak. 

“I was always a little afraid of having kids of my own, you’re right. I mean, you’ve seen the way that Sirius and I turned out, yeah?”

You and Remus scoffed at that.

“I just hated the idea of ever being anything like my parents, because that’s all I know. Or I guess, that was all I knew. But... I think you guys have taught me an awful lot.”

You watched Regulus’ stormy grey eyes as they moved between you and Remus. “You’ve both taught me to slow down, to be more patient, to see the fun in the mess and the burnt food and the change of plans. You’ve taught me that I won’t perish if I sit on the bathroom floor for a minute. And, I think most importantly, you’ve taught me how to love. And when I see how happy Harry is, I realize that’s all a kid really needs, yeah? Love?”

“You... you really want a child? This child?” You asked in a whisper.

Regulus’s face turned heartbroken for a moment. “You’re child? Absolutely, amour. There was never any doubt.”

“I always thought I’d pass on only the worst parts of me to any child.” Remus added, turning your attention to him. “But I find I’m only ever my best self when I’m around the two of you. And any child that’s even a fraction of either of you, well, I’d be one... one lucky man to call them mine.” He whimpered the end of his sentence before breaking out into a sob.

“Oh, Rem.” You murmured empathetically, pulling his larger frame into your side. He chuckled through happy tears as he moved one of his hands tentatively to your abdomen.

“A baby...” Regulus breathed, looking back at the paper in his hands. “We’re really going to have a baby?”

You and Remus exchanged a shy glance, understanding seeming to pass between the two of you before you both turned back to Regulus.

“We’re going to have a baby.” You concurred. 

[pianocat939]

Ah yes- the one guy everyone screams over-

Tw: controlling behaviour, implications of isolation, you get fucking restricted to a room-, helicopter dad (platonic part), kidnapping, violence

Yandere Miguel O'Hara Headcanons

Type: Controlling + Possessive

Romantic

He is definitely one who likes to control, I mean- just all the scenes of him were just him wanting to contain Miles and keep him from doing whatever he wished. Possessive? I headcanon it also goes into his want to control and his alternate being lost.

When you first meet him, I'm sure it's going to be negative or he just doesn't trust you at all. But, over time as you interact more negatively or positively, some character trait you have interested him or perhaps brings a memory he was once fond of. Then, he tries to talk to you more and slowly brings you to trust him.

He doesn't like taking the friend stage, because I just think he doesn't seem the type to ultimately trust people and call them friends. So after a few months, he'll straight up confess his romantic feelings to you. If you agree, the less severe his aggression and strictness will be. But here's the thing, he won't take no for an answer. So he'll just haul you over his shoulder and take you away to a secluded space where he can trap you- and don't bother escaping.

Depending on your response his actions and demeanour as a romantic partner will differ. If you don't actively purposefully disobey or disregard him he'll let you talk to others and go to places on your own. But he expects you to return to him at certain points of the day.

If you're not compliant with him he'll lock your up in a certain area and you are expected to obey the rules he has set unless you want more restrictions.

He's not super affectionate, but in private times and if he trusts you enough he'll give you some physical affection (because istg he is definitely some sappy word guy).

He IS violent when it comes to others. If they step outside their boundaries he is just a monster. So don't try to let other people get killed ok?

Honestly, he's just a troubled man who needs some support in his life.

"No one has been acting too close to you today, right? Because I'm definitely not in the mood to go scuff up another person today."

Platonic

He is definitely one who likes to control, I mean- just all the scenes of him were just him wanting to contain Miles and keep him from doing whatever he wished. Possessive? I headcanon it also goes into his want to control and his alternate being lost.

When you first meet him, I'm sure it's going to be negative or he just doesn't trust you at all. But, over time as you interact more negatively or positively, some character trait you have interested him or perhaps brings a memory he was once fond of. Then, he tries to talk to you more and slowly brings you to trust him.

He's honestly dad from there- like he constantly asks if you've taken the necessary things needed for a healthy life (food, liquid, vitamins, etc.) He'll be very helicopter dad definitely, ensuring you're "secure". If you're another spider, he might take the time to train you a little.

Depending on your response his actions and demeanour as a friend/father figure will differ. If you don't actively purposefully disobey or disregard him he'll let you talk to others and go to places on your own. But he expects you to return to him at certain points of the day.

If you're not compliant with him he'll lock your up in a certain area and you are expected to obey the rules he has set unless you want more restrictions.

He's not very affectionate, but he does show some love with the occasional head pat or gifting you stuff you want/like. He IS violent when it comes to others. If they step outside their boundaries he is just a monster. So don't try to let other people get killed ok?

Honestly, he's just a troubled man who needs some support in his life.

"What do you mean you've only drunk a litre of water today?! You need to drink more, so don't make me force it down your throat."

——————————————————

Yeah so here's some content for everybody's favourite-

I'm sorry but I cannot take him seriously at all- like I was almost laughing at him when I watched the movie-

My sleep schedule is really weird so apologies for uploading at an odd time today

- Celina

[evanpeterswhoresblog]

Office Secrets

Luke Cooper x f!reader

TW: smut, p in v, unprotected, fingering… lmk if there’s anything else lol

Word count: 1526

Friendly note, I wrote this all in one day so it’s probably not the best but I’ve been so obsessed w Evan lately I just needed to write lol Enjoy!!!

~~~

“So, who wants to bet the two newbies are doing it?” Meredith says as she puts coins into one of the vending machines.

“They so are,” Kevin says. “Have you seen the way they look at each other it’s like- Pam and Jim.”

“Hey!”

Angela shakes her head. “You people are disgusting… but I wouldn’t doubt it. I’ve seen them flirting on multiple occasions.”

“This is all circumstantial, it doesn’t mean they’re sleeping together,” Oscar argues.

“I would bet they are,” Phillas says with a laugh. “I mean I remember how fun it was being all secret with Bob, it’s so thrilling.”

Pam glances at you in the annex, Luke’s leaning back on your desk, smiling as you two talk. She looks back to the group and shrugs. “It’s possible they are.”

~~~

“Hey y/n, do you think you could make some copies for me?” Pam asks as you’re walking by.

“Yeah of course, double or single sided?” You reply with a smile.

“Double please.” She hands you the original.

You walk to the copier, but as you’re about to open it, Luke slips in front of you.

“Luke I was about to make copies,” you say, annoyed.

“So do I, you aren’t the only person in the office who needs to get stuff done,” he laughs.

“Since when have you ever had things to get done? You’re the laziest person here.”

“That’s hostile,” he replies, turning around to give you a smirk. “I might have to report you to HR.”

“Just please hurry up,” you mumble.

“Anything for you babe.” He winks.

You turn to the camera and stare, almost at your limit with this boy.

~~~

“I just don’t understand men sometimes it’s like, he’s so different when we’re alone yet in public he wants to be the biggest ass ever,” you rant to the camera, you’re in the hallway near the elevator where no one will hear you. “Sometimes I just want to knee him in the balls and get on with my day.”

“If he’s so annoying why do you sleep with him?”

You frown. “He’s really good at that stuff, most assholes are honestly.”

~~~

You’re at the vending machine getting a snack when you feel arms snake around your waist. You quickly turn around and push him away.

“Luke stop it we can’t be doing this here,” you whisper.

He looks out the windows then back at you. “Nobody’s around, come on just one kiss. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since last night baby.”

You and Luke were hired about three weeks ago now, both just interns to help out with the little things around the office. At first you thought Luke was an idiot slack off, but after a week of him constantly flirting with you, you decided he wasn’t that bad of a guy and of course he’s gorgeous. And, after one night where he gave you a ride home this simple work crush turned into casual sex.

You made Luke promise to keep it a secret, you didn’t want anyone at the office to think your personal life would interfere with you doing your job. So, far you don’t think anyone has figured it out, and your glad.

“Don’t talk like that here,” you say, giving him a slight glare. “We made a deal.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“I’m serious Luke, imagine if Michael found out. He’d make it a whole thing.”

“It probably already is a thing, Jim and Pams was.”

You scoff at him. “Okay, that doesn’t mean this has to be.”

“Whatever,” he says as he begins to walk away. “See you later.”

You give an annoyed look to the camera and shake your head before returning to your previous activity.

~~~

“Listen, y/n is a good girl I guess, I just wish she’d stop acting like the office finding out about our thing is the worst possibility imaginable,” Luke tells the crew outside the break room.

“What do you think would happen if they found out?”

“I don’t know, they’d give us weird looks. It doesn’t really matter it’s not like me and her are gonna be working here forever. At least I know I’m not, not sure what her life plans are.”

~~~

You stare at the clock and sigh, still a whole nother hour left at the office. This whole day has been terrible, mostly due to Luke. You don’t understand why he’s acting so annoying today. Usually he’s decent toward you, probably because of what he wants from you the second work ends. You turn back to your desk and start to organize papers, deciding Luke isn’t important.

A few have passed when Luke appears beside you. He leans back on your desk, one of his hands gripping the edge. You try to ignore him, keeping your attention on the stack of paper you’ve been messing with. Luke doesn’t let you ignore him forever though.

“Can you come with me somewhere where we can speak privately… away from the cameras.”

You look up at him. Is this it? Is he really going to break it off at work? You can’t believe it. You want to give him a piece of your mind, so you slightly nod and get up, following him out of the annex and down the hall to one of the stock rooms. You’re ready to start giving it to him but before you can he smashes his lips on yours.

At first, you’re caught off guard, he’s never kissed you at work before. You don’t hesitate to kiss him back however. He backs you up till the back of your legs hit a spare desk. You let him guide you onto it, your kiss turning into something more.

He bites down on your lip, his hands roaming up and down the sides of your body. You have to admit, you’d been craving this too. Even though you saw each other last night. Luke was the best you’d ever had, how were you supposed to not want him again? Even though he’s been annoying you all day you can’t help but melt into the palm of his hand, he’s just so damn attractive.

“Luke, we can’t do this at work,” you whisper, the sensible part of you taking over.

“Nobody will know, come on baby, I’ve been thinking of you all day. I need you,” he replies.

Your stomach fills with butterflies at his words. He knows exactly how to persuade you. You fall back on the desk as he kisses down your neck, Your legs wrap around his waist, he makes you feel so good. He brings his lips back up to yours as one of his hands starts to slip up your skirt and under your panties.

He starts to rub small circles on your clit; you to moan into his mouth. He smirks against your mouth. You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer, you love the feeling of his body against yours. It’s the best you’ve ever felt.

“You’re already so wet baby,” he mumbles on your lips.

“Luke,” you moan.

“Do you want it baby?”

You nod, moving one of your hands down to rub the bulge in his pants. He grins at you and removes his fingers, beginning to undo his belt and fly. In seconds you feel his tip brushing against your entrance. He leans back over you as he begins to slowly thrust inside of you. You bite down on your lip and close your eyes, the familiar feeling of him filling you taking over.

You throw your head back as he starts fucking you. The sound of the desk hitting the wall doesn’t even register in your head. You’re too engulfed in how good Luke’s dick feels inside you, hitting that special spot that makes your legs shake. His head rests in the crook of your neck, he’s moaning and whispering all the dirty things he wants to do to you. It’s all too good to be true.

Eventually though, you feel that tightening in your stomach, your orgasm approching. Luke must realize this because he doesn’t stop his violent thrusts for even a second. You hold on to him tightly, biting down on his clothed shoulder as you finally cum. He finishes with you, pushing himself so far inside you he’s hitting your cervix.

He lays on you for a few seconds before pulling himself up enough to look down at you. His chest is still heaving as he speaks in a soft voice, “I really like you y/n.”

“I really like you too Luke,” you say with a weak smile.

Both of you get yourselves decent fast, you’ve been away for at least fifteen minutes by now. You give Luke one last kiss before exiting the small room alone, he promised to wait a minute or too before following.

As you sit at your desk and resume your previous activities, Luke walks by you, sending a quick wink before disappearing into the main office. You give a small stare into one of the cameras, your face turning bright red. This was only the beginning.

[thousand-winters]

You know what I find really, really funny?

You know how Reigen drops his "oh, I don't think anybody would like me if they saw the real me" on Serizawa (that definitely was not on his job's description)? Obviously there's a whole thing there with how he sees himself but how in the end he stops lying to Mob and confesses the truth to him.

And then... he kinda just stops there.

In the spin-off he doesn't tell the truth to Tome until he thinks he has no other choice because she's putting herself in danger by working under the wrong assumption that he's a psychic, and while doing so, he asks her not to tell Serizawa. He was honest with Mob, but that was with him and only him. His default mode is still lying and hiding.

And the thing is obviously these people he has surrounded himself with, purposefully or accidentally, don't like him because they think he's an esper —at this point I don't think he's fooling even half of them, frankly—, or even because of his whole... energetic, over the top persona. They like him because of the kind of person he is, whether he's keeping his whole salesman attitude or whether he's a bit quieter and less self-assured.

Now, it's kinda easy to see why he would think he has to keep that up, initially he presented himself to Mob as this wise mentor figure, half of the other people he knows are kids for which he feels the responsibility to be a reliable adult figure, and then there are cases like Serizawa and the ex-Scars who do hold him in high regard and see him with a certain degree of admiration, all of that sort of tied with his fake psychic status.

And so it's very amusing to me that the one person who could show him VERY clearly that people care about him regardless of all of that is... Ritsu.

Because here's the thing, he was jealous of Reigen to some degree since he was someone Mob could confide in, unlike Ritsu due to the distance that had formed between them after the incident. And I think part of his irritation with Reigen was definitely that he was so evidently (to him anyway) a fraud, so that put Ritsu pre-awakening of his powers and Reigen at the same level and yet... Mob always went to Reigen for advice and guidance. It's very understandable for him to have been annoyed considering that.

Through the story it's more than evident that Ritsu is very, very aware that Reigen is a fraud, and though he's open with his distaste, at some point it feels a bit more like a normal kind of distaste. Reigen might have his morals and principles as a fraud, but he's one nonetheless, plus his personality doesn't mesh particularly well with Ritsu, and quite honestly? If I were 13yo and had to interact with someone like Reigen, I think I would be feeling a good amount of second hand embarrassment that ends up in annoyance.

But Ritsu doesn't really hate Reigen. He's comically annoyed by him, sure, but it's more than obvious he doesn't hate him.

When push comes to shove, he never wishes any actual ill will toward Reigen, he helps pull him away from Ishiguro in 7th Division Arc, for example, and when he goes to face Toichiro to help Mob, Ritsu is the one showing visible concern for what's going on when they see the explosion and the fire from down below, with his little "Reigen-san..." (as a sidenote, I love how the English dub does this with the "please, be okay").

My favorite example of this by far is Separation Arc, because Ritsu has genuine reasons to be pissed at Reigen this time around, if he sort of gathered that he mistreated Mob, and yet what he does is... he watches the press conference. It isn't even because of Mob, he's not sitting down with him or even watching with his parents or anything, it's just him, he had to have made the active choice to watch. And he could be vindictive and it would be such a reasonable posture to take because, again, Reigen was a goddamn jerk to his brother and the situation snowballed from there, but he isn't, he's visibly concerned for him.

That is NOT a boy who doesn't care, much less one who hates Reigen.

And it's so funny to me that the one person who could show Reigen all of those fears he has about that side of him he hates being a deal breaker for the people around him is also the one who makes faces at the idea of going to stay over at his apartment.

[vacantfields]

Things Are Better AU MASTER POST!

Tags used: Things Are Better AU | TAB AU | TAB AU Answers | TAB AU Writing | TAB AU Sun | TAB AU Moon | TAB AU Eclipse |

AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vacantfields

TAB AU: Singing Voices Spotify Playlist

YOU ARE ALLOWED TO: Draw, Write, etc with these guys! (ASK ABOUT NSFW !)(AND remember to credit me!!)

(I will attempt to use the tags as best as i can!! Do also note that things can change in this AU but this is the best place you can go look honestly)

[ In this AU, Sun, Eclipse, and Moon have gotten new bodies, some that are way more humanoid. Technically, they are not animatronics anymore, but the Pizzaplex they live at still deems them as such! They are also all separated; most importantly, THEY ARE NOT BROTHERS. They are best friends! (Sun and Moon, however, seem closer than that.) ]

[ It is set in the 20XX! The date doesn't matter. ]

[ The Location of this thriving Pizzaplex is in the heart of a big city, and the rest of the animatronics have gotten slight upgrades but have remained the same. Sun and Moon still run the Daycare. Eclipse stands as the security guard for the Daycare (Moon also still goes on patrols, as well). They live in the Daycare too! The layout is (sorta) the same as the original Pizzaplex. The boys can leave the place, but they must tell their handler or whoever runs the place how long they will be gone. The virus from the game is not here, BUT a virus is in this! It's highly aggressive and should be avoided at all costs. Moon used to have a virus, but most got removed from him when they moved into these bodies, although some of the virus remains in his code. Eclipse has a different virus embedded in him, and he cannot remember how he acted before; it basically wiped his personality, so now he's somewhat unpredictable. ]

They have humanoid/android bodies

The original body along with their personality chips were created in the middle of the 90s

Moon got his virus in 95 or so but they couldn't fully remove it as they would have to reset him and thats a chore plus it wasn't too dangerous so they moved the guys into separate bodies and it fixed most of it

the story is set in 20XX

The location is in a big city

They have been in the new bodies for around 5 years

The fire, gregory, etc. Did not happen here!

The virus Eclipse was made by some people who wanted to use the animatronics to attack people and make sure that fazbear would shut down

They are not the same guys from the game BUT they do act a lot like them! (kinda)

They used to share a body (Eclipse just being a security setting in them)

Moon has remains of a violent virus

Eclipse has the virus embedded in his code

Eclipse cannot remember who he was before the virus

The virus is not sentient... OR... Is it?

Despite not having the virus, Sun is not handling being alone in his head. His unstable and unused security program snaps in when he has breakdowns and makes his head think it's Moon talking to him.

Sun was the first personality chip then it was Moon and then Eclipse

Other facts

The virus does NOT like the color red on bodies. (Do not wear a red shirt or anything alike that around Eclipse he will attack and KILL.)(Though if they care about you he will hold back from mauling)

They cannot eat BUT! They can taste things!

Their face plates can still spin

They can still use the wire to "fly" around if they wish

They have a secondary voice box that they use for when they talk with people outside of the Daycare/or go out!

In the Daycare they use the "Canon" voice

They can also perform at "Adult Nights" at the pizzaplex, which consists of them singing on stage while the adults drink and so on.

Moon is the only one who actively performs so you can catch him in the evenings on stage!

They are all very flexible... And they can dance (;

They can also talk with each other through a shared headspace (like a group chat)

The old body is stored somewhere in the plex

--

⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊ SUN ⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊

He/They/We | 8'5" / 256cm | Daycare Attendant

[ Sun is a happy go lucky guy who hides a lot of his other emotions and sometimes they tumble in! He gets angry, he gets sassy, he gets upset, etc. !! ]

Secondary Voice (singing):

Without A Whisper | Sleepless Deathbed | Reverie

(Invent Animate)

----------

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ MOON ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆

He/They/We | 8'5" / 256cm | Naptime Attendant / Performer

[ Moon is your day to day gremlin. Crawling up walls and spider-walking across the floor in the darkness. Though he does easily get flustered if youre close enough to him! ]

Secondary Voice (singing):

Secret Scream | That Death Cannot Touch | No Accusations

(The Black Queen)

----------

☾✴ ๋࣭ ⭑ ECLIPSE ☾✴ ๋࣭ ⭑

He/They/We | 9'4" / 284cm | Security for the Daycare

[ Eclipse is a wild card. You never know if you can trust what comes out of his mouth but he seems docile for now ]

Secondary Voice (singing):

Broken Inside | Forevermore | Clouded Son

(Broken Iris)

----------

(Hopefully this made some sort of sense... I will probably edit here and there but (: !!)

[galedekarios]

i was thinking a bit more about the drow twins scene again in relation as to why gale might go along with it if so 'persuaded' by tav.

i've talked about the scene itself already (more than once), and i have seen other people discuss the topic very well, too.

i think i have come around as to why larian has the option there, and why gale might agree to go along with it, despite not only his initial refusal and not wishing to talk or think about it afterwards if tav tries to talk to him about it, but also rejecting every other to open the relationship up outside of this scene.

i have seen people say quite often that gale is toxic, but i honestly think that it leans more the other way around: gale is willing to accept toxicity from his partner to some extent, if it means he'll also be "loved".

one could already extrapolate that from what little we know from mystra's relationship with him, but also from the things he's willing to accept from a player character, including a tav, who, in this scene, can potentially coerce him with a dc 25 persuasion check into a foursome/fivesome without prior discussion.

i think this scene shows where gale is at this point in time, relationship-wise and love-wise. by staying even though he refuses initially, and i think it was intentional (in hindsight) on larian's part.

he endures imo because at least in this scenario with the drow twins, he was included here. asked to participate. he's not strong enough to break up with his partner, if they still extend at least this much to him.

whereas he does break up if tav cheats on him without including him, or he feels the relationship may be subsumed by someone else (i.e. the player engaging romantically with someone other than him, see his reaction to also romantically engaging with any of the other companions).

i do believe he's enduring tav's toxicity here with the mindset of pleasing them. he'll accept this, hopes that they have sated their curiosity now that they are done with their "rutting" as he puts it - and hopefully afterwards the entire affair then can be "confined to the footnotes" of their romance:

Gale: Ahem. I hope you’re not here to ask about our recent, erm, activities. I’d rather those were consigned to the footnotes of our romance, if it’s all the same with you.

i'm sorry if this is incoherent. i'm still trying to order my thoughts about this, but yeah, i just think this is where i land on it.

that even with how badly tav treats him here by springing this onto him, by not giving him time to think and even actively encouraging him not to think about it, he's still acknowledged as their partner. singular. and it's clear this is 'just' a sex thing.

the instances where he breaks up with tav is when tav sleeps with mizora, where he was not included nor acknowledged as their partner, or consulted prior (even as briefly as with the drow twins), or if tav tries to bring someone else into their romance, were he believes he would be lost in the equation of adding another person to what he shares with his partner now.

so here, in this moment, he just does it bc well, his partner told him not to overthink, right.

and he loves them. and he wants to please them. and he might come to enjoy it, just like they said. and it'll keep them happy.

he hopes it won't come up again.

(i should clarify that this is a personal interpretation and one that i’m not comfortable arguing over.)

[creature-wizard]

"I'm in a bad place and need to get out, what can I do?"

I figured I'd make a post with all the resources/tips I've collected to help people get out of shitty situations so far, since it's easier than linking to a bunch of posts each time.

Seek out appropriate resources. This can include support groups (online or offline), helplines, and the like.

If you're in the US, you can call 211 to help you find resources.

Crisis Text Line offers services to the US, Ireland, Canada, and the UK.

RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) is a US service offers a lot of information for sexual abuse survivors.

The Trevor Lifeline is a service for queer youth in the US.

If you're a minor, you may wish to read How To Escape Abusive Parents: A Guide For Minors.

If you're an adult, you may wish to read How To Escape Abusive Parents: A Guide For Adults.

You might also Duckduckgo something like "resources for people in abuse" or "abuse resources help" or "domestic violence survivors resources".

Ask people for help in finding resources. If you can't find anything on your own, there are other people who know where to direct you. It might take awhile to find what you're looking for, but keep asking.

A WORD OF CAUTION: there are many predatory spiritual groups and conspiracy theorists out there who prey on abuse survivors and mentally ill people. You will often see these people claiming that channeling or hypnosis can help you remember past life memories or repressed traumatic memories. This is nonsense and quackery.

Relevant posts of mine:

Hypnosis is unreliable for memory recovery, and this is one way we know.

False past life memories among the starseed movement

Here’s the trouble with hypnotic regression…

If you're on a website that claims to support cult survivors and you see any of these names in the citations (and make sure you check the citations!), leave immediately - all of these people are far right conspiracy theorists. (Unfortunately, many people today are unwittingly perpetuating the BS of Fritz Springmeier in particular. See this and this for more info on that.)

Change who and what you surround yourself with. Start associating with different people/groups as much as you can. Get hobbies to fill your time. Unfollow blogs that reinforce the beliefs you're trying to get away from, and follow blogs that provide a healthier alternative.

You might follow blogs like:

A Kind Place

Trauma Survivors Helping Trauma Survivors

Compassionate Reminders

Trauma Survivors Activities

Reasons For Hope

Bluest Fluff

If you're trying to rebuild your worldview without conspiratorial/culty elements, go take a look at my Resources page.

Remember that your first job is looking after yourself. You don't owe the group. You aren't responsible for the group, or for anyone in it. It might feel that way, but it's vitally important to acknowledge when you're unqualified or suffering burnout. You might feel like bad things will happen if you leave, but that's a fear, not a fact.

You also don't have to justify your departure to the group. You can just leave. If you feel that you must give a reason, you can offer something as simple as "I need to take some time to focus on my mental health" or "I'm really busy lately and don't have time to spend here." If they throw a fit over this, that's honestly just more proof that you need to get out.

If any practices the group taught you actually helped, you can keep doing them. If doing affirmations helped you, keep doing affirmations. If listening to so-called healing frequencies actually made you feel better, you don't have to stop listening to them. If you were practicing something like the Law of Assumption, you can carry on with a lot of that under a psychological model rather than Neville Goddard's wacky metaphysical model. (See this video for an example.) If it genuinely helps you and doesn't hurt anyone else, by all means, keep doing it.

Get some critical thinking skills. In order to keep yourself from falling into another bad group, it's important to develop your critical thinking skills.

Learn to apply the Five W's (who, what, when, where, and why) when encountering any information.

Learn common logical fallacies.

Learn the difference between fact, opinion, belief, and prejudice.

Don't equate emotional reactions with some kind of innate or higher moral guidance.

Ask yourself if you're "thinking for yourself" or being led to believe you're thinking for yourself.

Know what emotional manipulation tactics look like.

Watch out for these behaviors in any new group you join.

Yes, there are ways to confirm the age of an old text without having the original text itself.

Learn how propaganda works.

Watch out for these red flags in spiritual groups.

And watch out for this red flag.

Understand that belief doesn't have to be binary.

So yeah, hopefully this'll give folks some actionable advice. I can't promise it's going to help each and every person out there, but hopefully it'll give a lot of you something that will help.

[le-trash-prince]

Kenta

Okay. It is once again time for me to talk about my number one little man. I was interested in Kenta from the very beginning, and at some point I realized that I was not going to be normal about him, but I really did not anticipate how much he would come to mean to me. I hope y'all have enjoyed witnessing my descent into feral blorbo state. It is not over for me in the slightest.

I want to say that Garfield really acted the shit out of this role, and the writers knew what they were doing when they cast him. His arc was so important to the overall plot, with his growth being pivotal to Tony's downfall, and yet he had a relatively small amount of dialogue to work with (although certainly not the smallest amount of the cast).

A lot of his scenes involve him standing in Tony's office, taking instructions, or even just simply observing. A lot of his lines are based around business deals and errands—rather than furthering his emotional development. He doesn't give big speeches, he doesn't talk about his feelings or his dreams, it's always just "I'm doing xyz for Tony, and I will never betray him."

Some of his most dialogue heavy scenes are in one stairwell with Pete and in another with Tony, which I think are extremely pivotal moments, both of which reveal a fear of abandonment.

But it's honestly when he's quiet that he says the most.

And I love that, I'm obsessed with it. I love that the whole fandom could insantly tell that he and Pete had something going on, just from the way they looked at each other. I love that the storytelling in his arc was so highly visual.

In the beginning, Kenta appears to be nothing more than Tony's lackey: quiet, intimidating, and actively complicit with what is going on.

But as we see him more and more, it becomes exceedingly apparent that he cares, so much. I know I am biased in saying this, but I do also pay close attention to what other people are saying about Kenta, and I know almost everyone has been waiting the entire series to see him stand up to Tony. The amount of acting that Garfield did with his eyes, while remaining such a stoic character, was insane.

Despite him repeatedly declaring his loyalty to Tony, despite the fact that he does not reveal any actions against Tony until episode 12, we feel so much of his inner conflict.

I think for me, personally, the aspect of Kenta's character that I relate to the most is his inability to speak up when he wants to. I've struggled with selective mutism my entire life, and there have been countless, countless scenarios where I've had so many things to say and no ability to say them. The more dire the situation, the more my words fail me. I have to spend so much of my energy constantly planning for potential conflict scenarios just so I can have the time I need to figure out which words to use. Because it can sometimes take months for me to figure out certain phrases. And because it is so painful to stay silent when you want to tell someone to stop. To stop fighting, to stop hurting each other, to stop hurting me.

So I was beyond moved and proud to watch Kenta finally be able to protect his brothers and quietly say the one thing he has wanted to say all along.

Don't hurt anyone anymore.

Don't hurt anyone anymore.

Don't hurt anyone anymore.

I will take some of the words that P'Chod gave to Garfield before they went into production. "It’s just you want to live in a peaceful house and be happy together.” All we want is peace.

I wish that Kenta had not been forced to kill Tony because I don't think he has ever wanted to hurt anyone. But I'm sure as hell not sorry that he did it. There will always be people who are unwilling to stop.

And I recognize that Kenta tried a peaceful method first. He gave X-Hunter what they needed to put Tony in jail, and Tony refused to give up. He was never going to be the kind of person who would simply surrender. To him, these people's lives are property that he is entitled to.

Here is an auto translation of something Garfield said about Kenta at the final episode screening.

"I already knew that Kenta would be similar to me, in that I'm someone who doesn't dare to express my feelings to the people around me, saying very little. So when I got the role, I felt… that it teaches us that as long as we dare to be ourselves and do things that make us happy, that's enough."

We may never know what happened to Kenta after Tony died, but I hope he is able to find his peace. I hope he is able to engage with restorative justice, and I hope he is able to learn what family really should be.

And I hope that someone, anyone, will give him a goddamned hug.

the first shot / the last shot

Thank you, Kenta, from the bottom of my heart, for showing us yours.

[pluckyredhead]

ur post abt the green lantern’s political leanings was so interesting!! can you do one for the bat family? (but only if u wanna!!)

Honestly, I can't, because their politics are so incoherent.

Like, take Bruce. (And again, like with the Lanterns, I'm talking about canon here, not how I wish things were.) On the one hand, you would imagine he's pretty progressive, right? He's almost certainly a single issue voter and that single issue is gun control. He believes in rehabilitating criminals and in fact a lot of Wayne Enterprises hires are formerly incarcerated people. He is an active philanthropist who pours money into schools, orphanages, hospitals, public spaces, and the arts. These are all leftist values!

And yet the modern Batman is also a completely unrestrained violent anarchic-libertarian power fantasy. Bruce has invented his own law, which he enacts and enforces completely arbitrarily, however he feels like doing so. He obeys the laws he wants to obey and ignores the ones he doesn't care about, while insisting he is law-abiding. He tortures people literally constantly and considers it righteous. He uses the profits from his publicly traded company to become a one-man military industrial complex. (The emissions from the fucking Batmobile alone...!) He illegally surveils the entire city and sometimes the entire planet (Brother Eye, anyone?) because he has decided that his moral authority overrides literally anyone's right to privacy, anywhere. He allows his defeated foes to be locked up indefinitely regardless of their mental state in an institution that would make any qualified mental health professional run screaming in the opposite direction. He's sexist. All of these things sit on the right of the political spectrum, but imagine me pointing to the right like Charlie from It's Always Sunny pointing to his murder board.

And none of the Batfamily is any better. Some of them are honestly worse in certain aspects. Dick was a cop. Jason loves guns. Babs and Tim are even more in love with surveillance than Bruce is. Remember when Tim wanted to replace the police with, like, a Bat-army??? BECAUSE I DO.

It's not really "their fault," as much as anything can be a fictional character's fault. It's the result of being written by writers who are, for the most part, consciously trying to write the Bats as good Samaritans, but are also living in a world where we have had our brains warped by all of our blockbusters being funded by the US military, in a medium where badassery is prized above everything else, and so all this really problematic shit spills out onto the comics page without being questioned. It's also kind of a boiling frog situation: i.e. Batman has always had a cool car, so as he got tougher and tougher, of course that car would eventually become a tank, and no one stopped to go "Wait, what the fuck? What the fuck? How is this billionaire driving a tank around helping anyone???" I guess god bless Zack Snyder for inadvertently highlighting how fucking stupid and counterproductive a Batman taken to his worst extremes is.

To be clear, I don't think this is what most writers are trying to do with Batman (some of them are, but fuck those guys). But it's what happens when all you care about is rule of cool, and the more I think about it the more I'm like...shit, maybe Alan Moore was right and superheroes are just stupid.

Anyway in conclusion, comic book writers should consider the ramifications of what they're writing occasionally. But Bruce Wayne probably still votes blue, at least.

[ghostieyanyan]

Is it ok if we can see more of rock musician MC with the Yandere pop music club or Pomefiore once they discover their secret musical talent?

im doing Pomefiore cause at this rate, im doing everyone xD i dont might, it rewally makes me happy that you guys enjoy this series/topic (idk what to call it)

ill likely do heartslabyul and Ignihyde and Diasomnia will likely be together and theres still savannaclaw (though idk how well that goes lol)

who do you guys want next?

~Musical!mc~

Yan!Vil x mc

Yan!Rook x mc

Yan!Epel x mc

Warnings: yandere, manipulation, stalking, hints nsfw, hint of kidnapping?, the art is more on the fem!mc side but the fanfic parts should be gender-neutral (if not, im sorry and do tell me where so i can fix it qwq)

~~~~~

Rook

would you be surprised that rook found this little secret first? like he was the very first person to find out

the answer should be no and if not that no then you are sorely mistaken.

When did he find out? Who knows? But one thing for sure, he want to relish in the fact that he's the only one who knows. Other people might find out sooner or later but he has it in his head like you told him yourself. Like you held this important little secret close to your heart and in-trusted your heart to him. He lives in his own world.

He'll know when you sing. Its often when grim isn't present, like he messed with ace and deuce and getting collared by riddle. whatever grim did that had him busy, you often have your sweet alone time to sing our heart out.

Rook will help keep this talent of yours as secret as you want. if you want only a few to know, he'll accept it. if you don't want anyone to know, he'll make sure your secret is preserved for as long as you like. but honestly, if he had it his way, he'd be the only one to know. the only one that can hear your lovely voice.

Rook is a hunter and an active fan in the beauty department. hell take pictures of you and even record your voice. even when you're not singing. he has a recording of you sleep.. your sighs in the night, signaling if you have any discomfort or even pleasure in your dreams.

he'll take the moment in your dorm to look at your stuff. help here and there in your dorm. in the morning, you might find your clothes ready and prep for the next day. you might find your room less messy than you remembered the night before. you might see food that you don't remember when you've gotten it. you also find tea that states it "helps your voice"? did grim get this....?

Rook watches you like you were a bird. oh he wishes to capture you and hear you sing just for him alone but he also like you to be free. to watch your wings stretch into the sky as you sing with your heart and soul.

but he is a little curious on what would you do, if your wings were... clipped.

~~~~~

Vil

he is furious when he found out. how dare you not tell him!? How dare you to just sit idly by when your potato friends did the VDC and not to mention, watching them lose like idiots!

but... that's in the past and now he has to face this issues with a level head. he needs to know how well you sing, both in when you aren't pressured (your free alone time) and with his guidance and lessons. now you see why Epel runs for the hills during Vil lessons.

here's the thing about vil, you cant be 100% mad at his overbearing behavior to watch you succussed. he just wants to watch you thrive. plus he knows what its like in the music industry. he had to work side by side with it when he was young after all. you cant get mad at him, even if his words like like hot burning knifes to your skin.

when you think that hes heartless and you just want to break down with how harsh hes being, he gets to your level and speaks smoothing words to make you feel better.

"hey hey! i know its difficult and i wont have been this harsh with you if i knew you you couldn't take it. but you can. this industry is very mean but you have the talents to make it big and ill help you through it~ every step of the way~"

isnt vil a great actor? i mean he works really hard to hone his skills but this is next level. he has you wrapped around his little fingers. he doesnt care if you want to be big or even small in the music industry but with you by his hip. with your voice, you could even riverly neige! Imagine it. beautiful model with a lovely song bird by his side. their love story is so cute. its like a fairy tale! celebrty with everything finds love with a common no body.

but honestly, he'd be lying if he said it was just for celebrity gain. Vil has been eyeing you awhile, you were a great help during vdc and maybe... he just wants you to keep helping... but just him this time..

~~~~~

Epel

at first, epel thought he wouldn't care about that. in life he mainly wanted to be seen as the manly type. but with vil's lessons on beauty, makes him hate that whole aspect, entirely.

but when he first heard you... that changed everything.

he didn't mean to sneak up on you. it was late in the day, everyone was in their clubs but since hes been failing a class, vil forced him to improve his grades.

"leona would be fine without you for a day... but not for the rest of the year.so if you want to stay in in the magical shift club, get your grades up."

he decided to head to the library to study for a bit. a nice quiet place to read and study, or try to anyways. a few minutes passed and he wasn't feeling it with his textbook. epel just needed a quick walk around the library to help pump his blood flowing to his head, he thought.

and then, he heard you. you were doing a slight hum and soft singing mixture. but oh was it so sweet to his ears. he felt like he was with his grandma back in grade school when he would come home from school and she'll be making dinner for him. it reminded him of home, and how he missed it so much.

he'll likely not be the type to confront you about it, its your business and if you told him personally, he'd love that.

without realizing it, when he thought about you singing, he dreamed that you and him were married in his home town. he'll be coming home after a long days work and you'd welcome him home with a sweet smile. you might even ask if he wanted food, a bath, or even- oh shoot. Epel has to use the restroom NOW.

naughty boy.

[shawtythatluvsurgut]

gunna have a video of me feeding my feedee up on my onlyfans soon. i’m thinking about starting it back up while i take a break from college because it was kind of empowering to get to own my kink in such a way. I also enjoy sharing that side of myself with all of you. subscription price will be between $8-$10/mo since my feedee is going to be collaborating with me on certain pieces of content. i will maybe begin gaining again once i get my health back in check, we’ll see. i want my muscle mommy build back, and to get that back i’ll have to pack on some weight. so we’ll see what happens with that. ;)

in the meantime and between-time, stay safe. especially on the internet. all of my old rules still apply for messaging me, but i will gradually get back to making regular content and posts. now that i am taking a break from school, i’m working more, but I also have free time on my hands when i’m not working. it feels really nice to get back into the swing of things. I’ve missed you all and I’ve missed the positive aspects of this community.

going forward, i’m just going to block people who talk shit to me or delete their comments (unless it’s of actual importance to discuss). i’m just done engaging with that shit. idk, i’m on new medication that seem to be actually working and i feel stable, so i feel ready to re-embrace this community with open arms.

a special thank you to everyone who continued engaging with me and communicating with me during my break. i appreciate all of your kind words more than you know, and if i didn’t respond to you it was because i didn’t want the answer to “hey how are you?” to be “i’m miserable. how are you?”. but I saw all of you - each and every message, comment, text, etc. - and i just want to say thank you. the people who still proceeded to message me with positivity are the reason I have decided I want to come back.

With all that being said, I hope you will all accept me back. I understand that some of you were upset that I left and didn’t understand my reasonings, but I hope we can reconcile our differences and i can gain your trust again. I’m not the angry person that I became when responding to hate messages, and that also influenced my time away. I could see that my demeanor on this hellsite was changing and I was getting more upset, angry and, honestly, afraid of going on here (let alone posting myself on here). However, that has changed. I’ve been working on being more optimistic and caring less about the negative opinions of others. Frankly, if someone doesn’t like me or my content they should just be an adult about it and either reach out to discuss that or ignore me. If they can’t do that, I believe they are childish and need to get a grip. There are some key things I’ve learned in life that I want to share with people who are as I described above:

- your comfort is not someone else’s responsibility. if it makes you uncomfortable, then don’t engage. It’s as simple as that.

- no one has to cater to your interests. everyone lives on their own agenda. your wants and desires do not take priority over the wants and desires of others. sure, there are some people who will cater to your every wish, but i’m definitely not one of them.

- similarly to above, your desires do not take priority over someone’s health. that includes both mental health and physical health. (death feedism is a thing if you are interested in someone wanting to gain while not caring about their health. this is not a death feedism page and i suggest you go search in the tags for that if it is what you are looking for. I do not want to kill my feedee, nor do I want him or I to gain enough weight to become immobile or at risk in any way. As hot as the idea is to me at times, we are both too active and work in active careers for that to be a realistic possibility for us. maybe someday i’ll get a stay at home job and get really big, or maybe someday he will. only time can tell. sorry for the length, i’m high. i’ll stfu now.

- people don’t care. no stranger online owes it to you to care that you don’t like their body, or that you don’t like this or that. it doesn’t matter because that person does not know you. there’s no point in wasting time caring about your negative comment unless it’s actually useful and constructive commentary.

So anyways, i’m back in business again. gonna post some FA art soon + start uploading to my OF again. I thank any of you who read this far and again I hope you can accept me back into the community.

Thanks,

Nico

[bluepeachstudios]

Oo rank the splinters from worst to best dad! I have my own personal ranking but i wanna hear yours

SPLINTER BEST DAD: Worst to Best

Last Ronin Splinter: Raised children to fight in a family blood feud! Didn't let them stop even when they claimed to be tired of fighting and killing! Got one of his sons killed by refusing to retreat! Horrible person and father!

Mirage Splinter: Raised the turtles to kill a man that HE had the beef with because Shredder killed HIS master, but he couldn't do it on his own so he just!!! RAISED CHILDREN AS SOLDIERS INSTEAD???? He's mostly "sensei" instead of "dad".

IDW Splinter: OOuuhhohoho. I could get into it. I won't. I get why he did some of the things he did. Plus he never really raised kids, they just kinda. Mutated into teengers. Bad dad though like jesus. Made more trouble for his kids than he helped.

Bayverse Splinter: He's just.... there.... he taught them how to fight... his guidance is kinda blah and he's pretty harsh with his punishments. You don't see him have any really soft moments with the kids, but he's not really a horrible dad, he's just... meh. Mid. I blame this on the bad writing of the movies.

1987 Splinter: He's a great caretaker, honestly. But he's more a sensei than a dad. He acts more like their teacher, he calls them "my friends" or "my pupils" and "my turtles" which is v cute. They definitely see him as their dad/master. He's very good to them, so he gets extra points. <3

2012 Splinter: OKAY I KNOW PEOPLE ARE GONNA BE MAD ABOUT THIS ONE. But he ALMOST NEVER fights beside them. You never see him doing anything fun with the kids. I'm sure he has! But like you never see it in the show, he tends to keep a distance. He keeps them safe from the blood fued, doesn't want them getting involved with Shredder. He does push them to save the world and does the whole "sacrifice anything or anyone to complete the mission" to Leo, a 15 year old boy, and then just sits at home???? Until April has to convince him to help?? AND HE DOESN'T HELP HIS SONS HE HELPS APRIL AND I'M??? Anyway that always bothered me. I love him as a character.

Rise Splinter: Here's our boy! He's shown with photos that he participated in fun activities with the kids when they were little. Not in the best way, obviously, but like!! He helped them make a lemonade stand!! Which is such a human child thing to do. He wanted them to have a normal life! He refused to train them for a long time with anything but movies because he didn't want them to have to fight. He's depressed as hell and yeah he's selfish at times but he has character growth through the series and turns into an honestly great dad by the end of it. I wish they'd had more time to show that growth and the aftermath of it.

1990 Splinter: THE LIVE ACTION DAD EVER. (I'm electing to ignore The Next Mutation. he's not even a dad. he's their sensei. anyway fuck next mutatio-) He's so gentle with them. He loves them so much. Calls them his sons all the time. Protects them despite being captured and interrogated and presumably tortured for information. HE LOVES THEM SO MUCH.

2003 Splinter: The Best Dad. He's a rat dad. He's not carrying a whole lot of human baggage. He lost his family once and he knows how to make one now. He takes care of his boys, he scolds them for going out, and when he realizes they're going to keep going topside and he can't stop them, he makes them do it safely. He is with them for ALL of their big fights. He EXCLUSIVELY calls them "my sons" constantly. He loves them so much oh my god. Would die for them in a heartbeat. Never wanted them involved with the Foot, tried DESPERATELY to keep them safe from it, and when he realized they were involved, he explained everything to them. He hugs them every time they get separated, he handles Leo's Depression Arc(tm) as well as he can. He never gets mad at Leo for hurting him. He just realizes that he can't help his son and must send him to someone else. And that's so hard to do.

So anyway 2k3 Splinter is best rat dad. Rats were made to be dads imo.

[ghostflowerhotpotch]

Gwen's Spider-sense always on Miles?

Okay, so a few days ago I had an ask about my opinion on Gwen spider sense activating when Miles got in danger, and I accidentally ended up deleting the entire thing.

@ficsinhistory Sorry about that.

However this may had been for the best, because I went from not having much of an answer to what the fuck all of this means.

So, let's go with the basics.

We see Gwen's spider-sense before, when she was looking for Miles on his room while he was in Earth-42.

Now, this is something I had interpreted as she trying to use her spider-sense to see if she could sense Miles; a bit odd, but in the first movie the spiders literally sensed each other, sometimes even before realizing they were there.

(Alternatively, this may be them searching for them; tho considering Miles got bit recently on this movie and still was doing it, I am going more with they just sense the others at that moment.)

She came to the conclusion that Miles wasn't in this dimension by not sensing him here, which in theory could be him getting caught on something else but I mean she isn't wrong.

Here is the part where I actually ran out of answer.

(Side note, how HARD can Prowler Miles hit?! We had seen Miles got thrown into a billboard and get up fine, I know he is probably tired after everything but still.)

It really is that quickly, Miles is down and Gwen is immediately sensing something.

And here...I have nothing.

I wish I could have more thoughts about this, but honestly my mind had just been going on circles with this scene, and all I am thinking is how?

Look, I wish I could have a more to say about this, but honestly all I can think of is that I need an explanation as to how this is happening because the math isn't mathing for me.

However, I also saw the first movie recently, and something that brought my attention was a plot point in the last movie that ALSO drove me up the wall because I couldn't get how or why.

Gwen, unlike the other Spiders apparently, was blown a week before the incident with the Collider, and her Spider-sense told her to go to Visions Academy.

This always bothered me because I truly couldn't imagine how exactly this worked.

Spider-sense is primarily, suppose to work as a way for the spider to sense danger. In this movie, it also servers the purpose of communicating to the other spiders when they are around another who is one of them

Neither of those things is suppose to give you any directions, and more importantly, her spider-sense activated before Miles was even bitten.

Now, I thought that was perhaps because she was blown into last week, meaning she came through the portal when Miles already has been bit. So I try to think that maybe she could sense it because her spider-sense recognized the spider that was on the Collider?

It always felt like a flimsy excuse but I had nothing so oh well. I thought it was just a convenient plot point to get Gwen there and leave it like that.

Now? This has to be connected.

I am not sure how, why, or if it can work the other way around (Miles maybe sensing Gwen is in danger? Or have a better idea when she is around? Idk.) But I don't think it is a coincidence that Gwen had her spider-sense going to Miles before he was bitten, and now she can known when he is in danger in another dimension.

(Honestly this is all great material for a soulmate fic so anyone feel free to get on that.)

In the first movie, we saw the spider that bit Miles' glitch, but I really didn't saw people commenting in the possibility of the Spider being from another dimension, in fact most of the people I know had been shocked to realize that this was there for the beginning.

So, what are the chances that is not just all connected, but part of something bigger than we had yet still to know?

[ficcidio]

LIKE ANIMALS

pairing: toxic bf!jeongin x afab!reader

genre: angst angst angst

warnings: very toxic relationship, breakup, crying, cursing, screaming, fighting verbally, jeongin is very mean, so long because I can’t seem to shut up!

a/n: I’m back! I hope to be more active here! I hope you like it <3

now playing: for you by delaney bailey

You looked at Jeongin as he said his goodbyes to the rest of the people in your home. He looked so happy with them, but as soon as he left them, he became someone else. But it was honest your fault, you made him mad. You kinda wished you were one of his friends, but unfortunately you had to know your place.

You jokes around with the guests that were left but none of them laughed. You’re getting too comfortable in your skin again. It was your fault to embarrass yourself like that. You should have listened to him, it was your fault.

Jeongin looked at you while you simply stay quiet, like he wanted you to. Like he’d taught you to.

You stared at him, hoping he’s come to kiss you passionately, hoping he’d hug you, hoping he’s just say something. But he didn’t. As always.

You wanted to talk, you wanted to scream and yell at him but you couldn’t. You just stifled your voice again. But you wanted to talk to him. You liked talking to him. Well, actually, you liked when he used to talk to you. But it was your fault that he didn’t do it anymore. You weren’t that fun to talk to.

“The party was nice, wasn’t it?” you whispered, afraid your boyfriend would scream at you. But surprisingly, he didn’t.

“Yeah” he answered, grabbing his phone and sitting on the sofa, not even looking at you. “Just don’t joke like that again. It’s embarrassing”

You felt a wave of shame hit you like a truck. Embarrassment, even pity for yourself. Your cheeks started reddening, wanting to cry, but you laughed awkwardly at yourself instead of letting him know he had hit you where it hurt.

“Yeah, i know” you breathed out, you then walked to the couch and sat next to him. You still wanted to talk to him. You always did. “Han and Seungmin look fun to be around”

“Yeah” he repeated. He wasn’t even listening to you. He never did. Unlike you, you always paid attention to every single little thing he did or said, any sign, just anything. You truly loved him, but did he love you too? It was honestly your fault if he didn’t, because you didn’t even do anything for him to love you. Or that was what he always said.

“And-“ you couldn’t even finish the sentence. He looked up to you and you were met with his angry eyes. He was always angry at you. No matter what you did to make him happy, he always found something to be mad about.

“Can’t you just stop talking?” he said harshly. He had hurt your feelings. He always did. But it was honestly your fault, because you always let him.

Tears welled up in your eyes, but you didn’t even notice. You were so used to him making you cry, but it was okay, because it was your fault for being so sensitive.

“Yeah, I’ll go to sleep” you sighed, standing up.

“Good.”

✯✯✯✯✯

Two weeks later, nothing had changed. You didn’t expect it to, to be honest. It was your fault, though, because you always made him mad.

Your friends had told you so many times to leave him, saying he was hurting you, but you never listened to them. You loved him like a dog. How could you leave him when he loved you so much? Wait, did he?

“Love, can you clean the room while I make dinner, please?” you politely asked from the kitchen, afraid he’d get mad at you. He didn’t answer, he was just watching TV. You knew he did listen to you, he just didn’t care enough to answer. “Jeongin?” you repeated, expecting him to say something. But again, he ignored you.

You decided to stay silent. You sighed and continued cooking, deciding to understand him. He was tired because of practice and everything, it was okay, he was just tired. He always was. But it wasn’t your fau- no, no, what are you saying? It was your fault. You shouldn’t make him work after coming from work. You should do the work and let him relax.

You wondered when would he do something to help you. You didn’t ask for much, just to clear the table after lunch and clean the bathroom after showering, maybe even make the bed when he got up. But you had to understand him, he was just tired.

He was just tired.

You had to keep calm, it was normal.

Because he was just tired.

You had to understand that he never did anything, he was just tired. That was what he always said. And you had always told yourself it was true, and it was your fault.

But now, cooking at 9 pm both dinner and tomorrow’s lunch completely on your own, like your always did, you wondered if it was your fault. No, no, how could you doubt it? He had said it, and he was always right! It was your fault. It really was. But was it?

✯✯✯✯✯

“Y/n, clear the table. I’m going to take a nap.” he informed a week later, walking to sit down on the couch. But he didn’t make it there.

“No.” you answered. He stopped dead the moment he heard you. What? He turned to look at you, his eyes did it signal he was mad. He was surprised.

“What?”

This couldn’t be. You had always listened to him, did everything he asked for. You had always been his good girl, you always obeyed, you had never talked back. He wasn’t even mad at you denying to do what he asked you too, he was startled, take aback by the single word you had answered for the first time in so many years of saying.

“Do it yourself” you spoke, looking at him in the eyes. You headed to where he was, the couch, and sat there, still looking at him.

“Excuse me?” Now he was mad.

“You always ask me to do it for you, don’t you have hands?” You replied. You were right, he was very able to do it himself. But he never did, because he knew you’d do it if he asked you to.

“What the fuck, Y/n?” He was so taken aback by y he sudden change in your behavior, the way you didn’t let him control you anymore. He loved being able to control you. What was even happening? “Don’t you see I’m tired from practice? Are you that lazy that you can’t even do something for me?”

Now you were mad. You wouldn’t let him treat you like that. Not anymore. You wouldn’t let him embarrass you, make you feel like it was your fault. Not anymore. “Well, I’m also tired, Jeongin.” His name sounded so dry in your lips now, unlike it used to just a week ago.

“From what?”

“From you.” You said without even thinking, but you didn’t regret it. He deserved it. You were truly tired of him.

“The fuck are you talking about?” He elevated the tone of his voice, and if he did, you did too.

“You exhaust me so fucking much, I look like a fucking housewife! You know I have a goddamn job too, don’t you? I’m also tired from work every single day and I still do everything to you, I always let you just do nothing.”

“Well you don’t have to dance for hours! Your work is nothing compared to mine!” He yelled.

“If my work was being your girlfriend, it would fucking double the exhaustion of yours!” You yelled back. You knew you’d start crying anytime soon, but right now the anger was stronger than any pain possible.

“What is it with this fucking behavior of yours?!” He was truly offended by your words.

“You’ve made me have this behavior! This is what I’ve become because of you, because of your controlling and the way you ‘love’!” You screamed. You were sure the neighbors heard that. “But that’s not even love, is it? You don’t love me anymore.” Tears were now falling, but you didn’t care. You had to keep talking before your braveness disappeared and you had to obey again. You were scared— no, you were terrified.

“You’re so used to me being your pet, walking me around and doing anything you want me to. You know I’m not an animal, Jeongin. Or do you? I don’t even know now.” You continued talking. He was startled, he didn’t know what to answer. He wanted to talk back, defend himself, but how could he? Everything you were saying was true.

You always noticed the littlest things about him, you knew his body language by heart. Today wasn’t an exception; you noticed his hands shaking, his lower lip quivering and his eyes welling up with tears. You didn’t expect it. You pitied him a little, but you pitied yourself more. So you continued with your speech, because for once in so many years, you had the control over him and not the other way around.

“You’ve always made me feel like it was my fault, like there was something wrong with me; you’ve always taught me to keep quiet. You know what happens when you hold things in? You explode.” You talked harshly at him. “I haven’t changed. You’ve made me explode. You’ve destroyed me, and every perception of love I’ve ever had!”

He stares at you with his eyes filled with tears, something you had never seen in him before. He watches you as you cry, as you yell at him, as you tell him he’s destroyed you. Now, thinking of how he was being with you was so unpleasant, so painful for him to imagine. But while he was acting like that, he was completely blind by how powerful it made him feel. But now, as he’s seeing his whole life— or rather, you falling apart in front of his eyes…

Did he love you? God, of course he did. He loved you. Before, in his mind, the reason he was controlling you so much was because he loved you, and because you loved him. He thought, if you let him treat you like that, it was because you didn’t mind. In his mind, he wasn’t being rude to you, he was just— he doesn’t know, teaching you how to behave?

But now he realizes that he had barely treated you like a human being. He wasn’t teaching you how to behave— which, by the way, you didn’t need; you were an amazing woman and girlfriend. At this point, he was taming you, as if you were an animal, a dog he could teach tricks, a fish that would die if he didn’t feed you or an exotic parrot he only kept so he could put on a show when people came home.

It terrified him to think that this was the end, that you wouldn’t let him in your life ever again. You were the love of his life, he thought. He loved you. He truly did. But he didn’t know how to love someone and he never had interest in learning, and now, everything he’s ever said and done to you is charging him the only thing he still has next to him: you. The only thing he was sure that would never leave him, that was too scared to go, was ready to leave. It terrified him so fucking much.

“Say something, Jeongin…” you begged in a whisper, crying silently. He didn’t realize he had been thinking too much, he had again neglected you and your feelings, as he always did. But to be honest, he didn’t have anything to say.

“No, Y/n, you don’t understand, I…” He tried to fix it, but he was only messing it up more. He had to stop making up excuses and trying to make her feel dumb, he had to stop victimizing himself, he had to stop trying to be in control over every situation. But he couldn’t. It had consumed him. Control had consumed the loving boyfriend he once was.

“Fuck off, Jeongin” You cut him when you heard him trying to victimize himself again, leaving him speechless. You were so used to it, but you wouldn’t allow it anymore. “I’ve loved you so much. I’ve thrown out my life in Australia for you, I’ve picked up my whole fucking life and moved here just to be near you, only for you to turn out to be the shitty boyfriend you are” You tell him, not caring if his feelings got hurt by your words. Not anymore. “Because that’s what you are, Jeongin. You’re a fucking terrible boyfriend, and I feel so bad for myself for everything I’ve had to bear just because I loved you. Because I did. I loved you. I still do, and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to stop loving you. And that’s the worst part, knowing I’ll miss every single thing you’ve done to me.” You started off harshly, but your voice got more and more muffled by your tears after every word you said.

You stayed silent. He stayed silent. None of you knew what to say. He didn’t know how to talk to you, he felt embarrassed for every thing he’d done to you. So he said the only thing he knew he must’ve say for so long. The three words you’d been expecting for almost four years came out of his lips in less than two seconds.

“I am sorry.”

You stayed silent again. He stayed silent again. None of you knew what to say. You looked at him with red and puffy eyes. He looked at you with guilt and sadness in his eyes. That’s all you needed, that’s all he needed to know he’d never see you again. At least, not like he wished. Not like the love of his life.

You sighed and looked down, but then you looked up to meet with his eyes one last time. It was the first time in so long you stayed silent because you wanted to, not because he made you. It was the first time you had a voice, it was the first time you weren’t controlled like a puppet.

You grabbed your phone, your keys and your charger and walked to the door. He followed you, but he had no intention in stopping you. He had already controlled you enough. He knew he’d been holding you hostage for too long, he had to set you free, to let you go. He wasn’t ready, but he knew he must.

“I hope you heal” You said, then you opened the door and walked out. You turned around to look at him one last time. Your eyes met with his teary eyes. He smiled at you and nodded, as in a way of letting you know that it was okay, that he would let you go; that, for the first time, he understood you. You felt the connection you felt the moment you met, the moment he kissed you for the first time. You felt those teenage butterflies, butterflies that were about to die in just a few seconds.

You would miss him, but it was for the best. At least, you wouldn’t have to love him like a dog.

✯✯✯✯✯

You never came back to his apartment, not even to get your things back. You wanted a fresh start.

At first it was such a bittersweet feeling to be finally free. For some reason, him controlling you was comforting, because your choices didn’t depend on you. Because you didn’t have any responsibility in your life. Now, it all depended on you, on what you chose. Now you had your own mouth, your own hands, your own body. Before, you were his. Now, you were yours.

No more asking him what he wanted you to cook for dinner, no more making both sides of the bed on your own, no more crying alone.

The first month was a mess. You didn’t know what to do, you didn’t know how to decide for your own, you didn’t know how to live without him. You were so lucky your best friend, Maia, let you stay with in her apartment. She gave you clothes, food and a shoulder to cry on. She was your biggest supporter. She taught you to be free, to be yourself, and you were forever grateful.

After six months, you were fine, you think. You still thought about him, how could you ever forget? You dreamed with him, you saw him in every little thing. His members tried to approach you, they apologized to you. Chan was the only one you let in, he was the only one that didn’t defend him while he was your partner. Chan was the only one that had had his feet on earth the whole time. You didn’t let the rest talk to you, It hurt a lot. It hurt to remember him.

But after the first year, his memory didn’t hurt as much. It was a loving thought that sometimes appeared in your mind. More often than you wished, but now you remembered him with love, with appreciation, because he had taught you so much, and he had loved you so much. He had taught you how you didn’t want to be loved. He had taught you how to survive on your own, how to deal with hateful love. The first month, you wished you had never met him. After a year, you were thankful you had met him.

Korea’s streets looked empty and lifeless without him for a while. Not waiting for him after practice and not running a bath for him when he came from work made you feel like there was a big hole in your heart for a while, but you endured it, and you were proud of yourself for that. You were very strong.

You really wished he healed like you did.

After two years, you decided it was time to come back home. You thanked Maia and Chan for everything, booked a flight to Australia and came home. You rented an apartment and moved your whole life again. You were happy.

You even got a job. You had made it, you had healed. Jeongin appeared in your dreams occasionally, and he was a recurrent thought, but you were okay with that. You accepted it was a part of you.

It was different for Jeongin. The first eight months, he couldn’t breathe without you. He felt so guilty for hurting you, of being the man he had promised himself to never be. He wouldn’t stop blaming himself, because who else could he blame? It was all his fault.

He missed you. He needed you like oxygen. Every time he came home to a lightless house and empty rooms he felt his heart ache. His room was messy, you weren’t there to clean it.

He kept your things just like the day you left, he didn’t dare to touch them. All the pictures, your jewelry, it was still there strictly untouched. He was scared someday you’d take everything you left there, he would’ve understood if you did, but you never did. So, yeah, the pajamas you had left on your side of the bed after changing were still laying there untouched.

He realized he didn’t know how to cook, you always did it. He had to learn how to. His food was good, yeah, but he liked yours. Even when he followed the exact same recipe as you did, it always tasted different. He liked your food. He missed your food.

He missed the smell of you. He used your shampoo and your cologne for a while, until he ran out of them. He didn’t allow himself to keep buying them, it hurt him, so he used them one last time and let go of you.

With the help of him members, he decided to use all that pain and guilt he felt to become a best person, to heal, just like you wished for him to. The first thing he did was forgive himself. He knew he wouldn’t be able to do it if he didn’t. He apologized to everyone he had hurt, except of you. He could reach you easily, Chan had your contact and he was your friend. He’d been keeping Jeongin updated on how you were doing through it all. He watched you both hurt and heal in your own way at your own pace.

He apologized to the staff he screamed at when he was angry, to the friends he insulted brutally when they teased him, and to the members he blamed when he was stressed. He took all the responsibility and blame for his actions, and he handled it. He apologized for everything.

He liked apologizing. He used to hate it, it made him feel vulnerable, but now, he loved it. It was a way of showing his growth as a person, his healing.

FIVE YEARS LATER.

You had opened your own café. Yeah, your own, and it had been so successful! It felt so right. Everything was in order, everything was okay now.

You handed your customer the coffee she had ordered and smiled at her. “Have a great day!” You said, and when she left, you smiled proudly. Your coworker, Olivia— Ollie, how you liked your call her, approached you.

“Y/n, there’s someone waiting for you. Table 6” She said. You frowned, who could be visiting you now? All your friends were working, and your family lived far away.

“What? Who?” You asked her, but she didn’t answer. “Ollie!”

“Just go, girl!” Ollie replied, pushing you slightly towards the small door that divides the kitchen and the café.

“I can’t go now, my turn hasn’t finished yet.” You answered, trying to come back, but she kept pushing you.

“I’ll do it for you. It’s not a busy day, anyway” Mario, another of your coworkers— and one of your dearest friends, said. You groaned frustratedly, they were so stubborn. But you accepted.

You undid the ponytail you had your hair in and walked to the table 6, like Ollie told you.

Then, you saw him. He was looking at you. He was so changed, his aura was so much different, he was shining. He looked like he had healed. Just like you wished for him to. You, confused, walked up to him. He smiled at you sweetly. That sweet smile that made you fall in love with him. Without a word, you say in front of him. You decided to let him talk, say everything he wanted to after almost seven years.

“It’s been a while, Y/n” He smiled, his dimples showing cutely. You couldn’t help but smile, suddenly feeling shy. He used to always make you feel shy.

“Yeah.” You breathed out. “You’ve changed so much” You notice. He nods.

“You have, too. You look beautiful.” He whispered, and you swore your eyes shined like the exact first moment he asked you to be his girlfriend. He looked up at the building and then back down at you. “So, this place is yours?”

“It is mine” You smiled proudly. You felt in love again. You shouldn’t, but you did. After so many years of missing him, crying for him, wanting to come back to him… you were in front of him. Finally. “Why are you here, Jeongin?”

His name sounded to sweet in your lips. He had never loved his name so much, until he heard you say it.

He sighed and your gazes connected. “I’ve spent the past seven years experiencing the consequences of my actions, trying to heal, like you wished for me to do the last time I saw you. I’ve forgiven myself, I’ve put my life in order, I’ve apologized to everyone I’ve hurt, except for you. I wanted to apologize to you.” He stated seriously. You knew this time he meant it. You were sure he had changed. This time it was different.

“In the past, I’ve hurt you so much. I was such a bad boyfriend, a bad company and a bad person overall. I’m these seven years, I’ve never felt confident enough to come and apologize to you, the person I’ve hurt the most. I’m so sorry you’ve had to wait so long for an apology.” He breathed and continued talking. “I made you go through so much, and I sincerely apologize to you. I know this won’t make it go away, all the pain I’ve caused you, but I do want you to know that I’ve grown up. I’m not that anymore, and I’ll never be. I’ve healed, just like you wanted me to. You’re the person I healed for. You’re the reason I decided to take care of the consequences, to take everything life throws at me because of my past mistakes.”

You looked down, fidgeting with your own hands. You didn’t know how to react.

“You’ve been the love of my life, and I’m so thankful that you were the one that made me realize all these things. Without you, I would’ve never been able to make it. You were my partner for so long, and I’m so grateful of all the happy moments we spend together. I’m sorry we ended up like that, I’m so sorry I made you live. For a long time, I couldn’t sleep at night. Guilty was eating me up.” He whispered. “I was sent on hiatus a week after you left. I wouldn’t eat or sleep without you. I was so blind by the control I had over you, that the moment I opened my eyes, you were already gone, and it was my fault. I had to go to therapy, and even though it took me over a year to get over it, I healed. I forgave myself, and I sincerely hope you can forgive me as well. I am sorry, Y/n.”

You smiled at him sweetly, that smiled he had fallen in love with. “To be honest, I didn’t expect you to come. After so many years of waiting for you, I gave up on waiting for an apology, or just an answer. You’ve made me hurt a lot, that’s true, but I do believe our relationship has taught me so much, and I wouldn’t be who I am without you. I don’t hate you. I hated you for a while, but I realized hate is pointless, and you can’t hate someone you’ve loved for so long. I believe I still love you, and I never will stop loving you, because you’re a part of me. I don’t miss you anymore, but like I’ve always told you, if you ever heard me, I will always love you, and you’ll always be in my heart. I forgive you, Jeongin. I know you’ve worked hard, and I’m so glad you decided to heal. That’s the only thing I would ever want from you. Thank you for coming here, I appreciate it.”

You didn’t realize the tears falling down your cheeks until you noticed his. He smiled and nodded, wiping his own tears with the back of his hand. He looked at you, his eyes showed love, care.

“That’s the only thing I needed to hear to finally close this chapter of my life and move on. Once again, thank you, Y/n. I will always feel grateful for meeting you, and I will always love you.”

You smiled sweetly at him and wiped your tears too. You nodded and giggled at how you both were crying over that.

“Dad!” You heard the voice of a little kid near you. You saw Jeongin pick up the kid and caressing his arms. The kid looked exactly like Jeongin. “Wonnie, say hi to Y/n” He said in a sweet voice. You loved this side of him. You loved him so much.

“Hi Wonnie, I’m Y/n” You said in the same tone. The little kid giggled and greeted you with his hands. “Is he your son?”

“Yeah. As I told you, in all this time I was able to put my life in order and… here he is.” He explained with a smile. You were sure he was going to be the greatest dad ever. You smiled and played a little with the child. He was so cute. That was until you heard a female voice.

“Love!” She yelled. That’s when you realized she was talking to Jeongin. He turned to look at her and signaled her to wait with his hands.

“She’s Alicia, my wife.” He explained. “I love her so much, and I’m trying to be the best husband for her. I’m trying to be the great partner I wasn’t in the past. I am so deeply in love with her.”

Ouch.

That had hurt so fucking much.

But what could you expect? Going back to him? He was just there to apologize, and you appreciated so much that he did. You knew he would be the greater husband for her, and you were happy for him. He has made it. He had healed, and so had you.

Now, you had to carry on with your life and let him live his. All of the mistakes and everything you once went through is just a way to learn, to be better, to improve and grow as a person.

You had wanted to give up in so many moments, but now, seeing how you’ve both made it and put your life in order, you realize this was the whole propose of it. Each person is a lesson. They come in your life, teach you something, and go. Jeongin’s path met yours with so much intensity and it was so hard to let go, but eventually, you continued with your own, and so did he. And you were proud.

It was bittersweet, but after all, he was just a lesson, like everyone else. You were just two teenagers that fell in love. You were just two teenagers that fell in love and loved each other like animals.