#i am afraid!!! they’re gonna make this hurt!!! they better make it hurt!!!

[hihomeghere]

Dreams | Arthur Morgan/Reader

Word Count : 1.1k Summary : Arthur starts having dreams of starting a family with you Warnings/tags : Cursing, fluff, mention of infidelity, just Arthur being a sweet guy <3

He knows he shouldn’t feel like this. Shouldn’t be having these thoughts, because all they are just dreams. They’re never going to become a reality. Not when they’re constantly on the move, running from place to place. He sees the way it affects Jack, poor kid, not knowing what the hell is going on. And his daddy doesn’t exactly help him understand. 

He can’t even say he would be a better father, he wasn’t before. 

Hell you two ain’t even married yet, and he’s not that much of a fool. Not anymore. His regret for not marrying Eliza weighs heavily on him most days, even if he didn’t love her in that way. Now you on the other hand, he loves you more than anything. More than this stupid gang, more than life itself. He would happily lay down his life if he knew you would be happy, safe. 

When these thoughts enter his head, he can’t say. His days sort of blend together, making it hard to pinpoint. Although seeing you interact with Jack doesn’t help. 

You are so sweet, so motherly, hell you even mother the younger folks in the gang. Soft touches, kind words, but internally strong. You have all the qualities he finds attractive in a woman. Somehow you fell for him just as hard as he fell for you. 

But he ain’t a fool, he knows this ain’t the right time or place. So instead he writes down all these dreams in his journal, his safe place. The place where he can say anything without being judged. He dreams of little girls, he didn’t know how to interact with Isaac. Too afraid of being his own father. Girls seem less daunting, and a little you would be perfect. He already has one angel, what’s one more?

He comes up with the name while north of Brandywine Drop. The bright purple flowers caught his eye just off the trail.

Violet.

Violet Beatrice Morgan.

His heart sings, scribbling the name down in the margins of his journal. He finds himself writing VM in his journal, smiling foolishly to himself. It’s beautiful, his precious flower. 

It’s not like you meant to snoop. You were looking for Arthur, since he was nowhere to be found. You entered his tent, which in reality wasn’t much of a tent at all, finding his journal open. You walked over to it, looking over the worn page. There were the normal doodles he drew, along with his flowing hand writing. But one thing stood out to you, a pair of initials circled by hearts. VM.

You furrowed your brows, you couldn’t think of anyone you knew with the initials VM. Those definitely weren’t your initials either. 

With your curiosity peaked you flipped through a couple more pages. VM was written everywhere, along with those damn little hearts. 

You felt that little green monster grow inside you the further you looked into his journal. Biting your cheek so hard you could taste blood. It did nothing to quench the fire inside of you. 

“Darlin?” Arthur called walking into the so-called tent. You dropped the journal back onto the table, turning to face him. “There you are.” He grinned walking towards you.

“Here I am.” You said forcing a smile.

“Hosea said you were looking for me.” He said softly, reaching up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, "Anything you need?”

“Must have forgot.” You said with a noncommittal shrug, “I ought to get back to work.” You nod walking past him. Arthur furrowed his brow at your attitude. Did he say something to offend you?

Then his eyes fall onto his open journal. His stomach drops at the sight. Jesus, you saw. You saw all of it. You were probably thinking the worst, seeing the initial surrounded by hearts. How was he gonna fix this?

You stomped off to the edge of camp, trying to wrack your brain as to who this VM could be. And why was Arthur drawing hearts beside the initials? Maybe you had this all wrong, Arthur would never do anything to hurt you. He was a good man, a man you could trust. Wasn't he?

“Y/n!” He called trailing behind you, a crestfallen expression on his face. You stopped at the tree lining, biting your lip as you turned to face him. “I can explain.”

“I’m sure you can.” You scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I-“ He sighed looking down, pinching the bridge of his nose as he let out a low curse. 

“Who is she?” You asked clenching your jaw. He furrowed his brows looking up at you.

“What?” He asked, his hands settling on his hips.

“VM, the girl you keep drawing hearts around. Who is she?” You were blunt, something he loved so much. Always telling it like it is, never leaving him to guess your feelings. A small smile spread on his face, which only made you more mad. “Seriously, you think this is funny?” You hissed, taking a step towards him. Arthur only had one choice, to tell you the truth. 

“Violet.” He said softly, reaching for you. “Violet Morgan.” You let him wrap his hand around your forearm, pulling you close to his chest.

“Who is Violet Morgan?” You asked, swallowing thickly. He sighed, looking off to the side, wetting his lips.

“She’s uh-“ He shook his head, a nervous smile on his lips. “She’s not exactly real, not yet at least.” He said. 

You shook your head, brows knitted together, “Not real? The hell you mean, not real?”

“I-“ He rubbed the back of his neck looking down, “It’s uh- shit.”

“Spit it out Morgan.” You huff throwing your arms up. 

“I thought of a name,” He explained, “A name for a girl if we- if we have one some day.” He said with a shrug, his cheeks flushed, almost as though he had been in a scuffle. 

Oh.

If we have one some day. 

“Oh Arthur.” You said softly, a smile spreading across your face. Feeling suddenly very foolish for doubting your man. “That's so sweet.” You took a step forward, tilting his face up to look at you. 

“Yeah?” He asked, looping his fingers in his gun belt. 

“Yeah.” You repeated, nodding. “Jesus you had me scared you were gonna tell me you found someone else.” You chuckled, shaking your head.

“Never. There ain’t no one else in this goddamn world that could replace you.” He said his hand reached up to cup your face. “You’re uh- you’re it for me darlin.” His bright blue eyes peered into yours, love and affection pouring out in his expression. 

“When we have our girl.” You said brushing away a stray strand of honey brown hair, “Violet will be a perfect name.” He grinned, wrapping a hand around your waist.

“Guess it’s settled then.” He said as he leaned down to press his lips against yours.

[sarahowritesostucky]

📖"Temporary Custody"

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Steve x ofc x Bucky; Steve x Bucky

Word Count: 3658

Tags: Dom/sub, bdsm au, dom Bucky, sub reader, hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, gay sex'n'stuff, straight sex'n'stuff, Steve being a literal Golden Retriever, mental health issues, dub-con, forced submission, bakery au, m/f/m, gentle domination, total power exchange

Summary: The stigma and shame of being a submissive has kept Mary unfulfilled and in the closet her whole life, until an inciting incident leads to Bucky and Steve taking her in and giving her everything she was always too afraid to ask for.

Trigger warnings: This story contains background themes of eating disordered behavior, body image issues, self-harm, and alcohol abuse.

Wait! I haven't read an earlier chapter of this fic! Story Masterpost

3. Cream filled Sponge Cakes (with chemicals)

Bucky

They plan out what they’re going to do when they get to the hospital on the car ride over.

“I think it’s best if you wait outside at first,” Bucky says, glancing away from the road for a second to try and gauge Steve’s reaction to this. He looks neutral. “Just because she’s already pissed,” he adds. “And it’ll probably be overwhelming having one person telling her they’re taking custody, let alone two.”

“Yeah,” Steve agrees. “That makes sense.”

Bucky holds his hand out over the center console, waiting for Steve to take it. He does, and Bucky grips his hand tight. “I’ll get the initial stuff out of the way. I’m sure there’s gonna be a ton of paperwork.”

“What if she refuses?” Steve worries. “She can, right?”

Bucky sighs. “Yeah. I don’t have any legal hold on her. Yet. I’ll just have to try and talk sense into her, get her to see that we’re better than the alternative.”

Steve gives his hand a squeeze back. “You can do it.”

Bucky sighs. “I hope so. I really do.” Inside though, he’s already not so sure.

They get to the hospital about forty-five minutes after Bucky’d hung up from the phone call with the police officer. He spots a cruiser parked outside when they approach the emergency room, and it rankles his nerves to think of Mary being forcibly shoved into the back seat of said car.

He goes to the check in desk with Steve and asks for Officer Santiago. “I got a call about an involuntary hold. My submissive,” he says. 

The woman at the desk does a double take at that, looking up and down Bucky where he stands like she’s just realized he’s a different species. “Oh,” she says. “You're one of those?” 

Bucky ignores it, but he can sense Steve tensing up by his side, indignant on his behalf. “Yes,” he says. “I am.” He’s not going to waste time getting on his spiel about mental illness and stigmatization. They’ve got bigger problems right now. “I’m going to need her records,” he says, injecting authority into his tone. “And any paperwork for transfer of custody. The cops brought her in. Name’s Mary.” He shoves his hands in his pockets and tries to look self-assured while he waits, because he doesn’t know what he’ll do if the woman demands a last name.

It takes her several minutes to gather everything up for Bucky. She hands it all over to him and says, “That’s the paperwork for custody. The attending physician should be able to provide you with her medical workup.” She points to a set of double doors. “You go down that hallway and to the left. Bed number four.”

Bucky nods and thanks her, then turns to Steve.

“I know,” Steve says, putting on a brave smile. “I’ll wait here.”

“Baby.” Bucky steps close, pulling him into his arms. Steve’s physically just a little bigger than him, and Bucky has always liked the novelty of that. He kisses him gently and then rests their foreheads together for a moment, letting Steve feel their connection. “I love you,” he says quietly. “You’re the best thing I could ever hope for, you know that?”

Steve’s smile is more natural, now. “Yeah I know it.” He gives Bucky another kiss and stands back. “Hey, what about this?” He knocks on Bucky’s shoulder—the metal one. “She know about that?”

Bucky realizes that he’s not wearing his glove, and tries to remember if he’d had it on at the café. He frowns. “Oh well. I don’t think that’s going to be her main focus, not after I explain everything to her.”

“Yeah.” Steve gives him a light push. “I Love you. Now on and get the hard part over with. I’ll be here when you need me.” 

Bucky nods. He knows he will. He goes back to the check in desk, one last question on his mind. “Is there a food court or something around here?”

Mary

Mary’s taken a break from saying pissy things to the cop who’s guarding her. She’s been so angry, she’s felt like her skin’s boiling. But now she’s starting to get tired, too. She hadn’t slept last night, just stayed up and gabbed on the phone to that crisis counselor. 

She grits her teeth as she fumes about that, feeling betrayed all over again. That bitch had called the cops on her!

“You can tell me anything you want to. I’m here to listen, remember?”

Liar!

“I hope you know I don’t have insurance,” Mary snaps at the officer. He’s sitting in a chair in her little curtained off area. He regards her coolly, saying nothing, and she jerks her head to indicate the emergency room. “And I’m not paying a single red cent for any of this.” So far, they’ve taken her blood, her pulse, an EKG, and sent in nurses, a resident, and several shrinks. They’d tried to put an IV in her but she’d ripped it out as soon as nobody was looking. “I’m suing the hospital,” she adds. “And you. I’m suing the whole police department.”

“Okay,” Santiago says, annoyingly calm.

Mary growls, rattling her hand where it’s cuffed to the bed rail. “This is unconstitutional!”

There’s the sound of a throat clearing, and then the curtain to their area is being pulled aside. Mary’s eyes go wide when she sees who it is. “You?!”

Bucky smiles politely at her. “Me.” He steps into the curtained room, a little snack bag in his hand. He holds it up to show her, and she sees the Hostess logo. It’s a bag of little … sponge cake pastries. “Best I could do on such short notice. They’re for you, if you behave,” he says, talking to her like a pet being offered a treat.

Mary wrinkles her nose. “Pass. D’you even know all the chemicals they put in those things?”

Bucky shrugs and turns to offer them to officer Santiago, who more than happily accepts. Mary pouts as she watches him rip open the bag and stuff one in his mouth.

“How are you doing, Mary?”

She turns her attention to Bucky and scowls at the way he uses her name like he knows her. “Awful,” she says. She jerks her head at Santiago. “Officer Dickwad over here won’t let me have my phone.”

“Language,” Santiago says dispassionately, through a mouthful of cake. 

“Shut up and eat your fucking donut, Rent’a’cop.”

Bucky

He puts his foot down once she starts flinging curses and insults at the officer. As a paramedic, Steve is always in and out of emergency rooms, often working in coordination with law enforcement to deal with uncooperative patients. So Bucky knows just how much drama and belligerence these guys have to deal with on the regular. 

“Hey,” he says sternly. “Don’t disrespect him. He’s just doing his job.” He’s not mean about it, but it’s verging on what Steve likes to call his “Dom” voice, and Bucky can see how it affects Mary. She freezes up, all of her focus on him. For a few seconds, she even forgets to be angry. Bucky takes the opportunity to step close to the bed. He eyes where she’s cuffed to the rail. “Mary,” he says gently. “I know you don’t want to be here. I know you’re angry.”

“You’re damn right I am,” she growls. “They just showed up and threw me in a cop car! Didn’t even give me a choice!”

Bucky reaches out and places his hand atop her cuffed wrist. It’s his metal hand. Her eyes widen when she sees it, but she doesn’t pull away. “I know,” Bucky says. “And I’m sorry it happened that way. But do you understand why people were concerned for your safety?”

Her face tenses up as she tries to hold back some emotion (something tells Bucky it isn’t anger, this time). “They called the cops,” she pouts. “They lied to me.”

“They did,” Bucky agrees, wanting to placate her. “But you were hurting yourself, honey. And you were talking about doing worse, weren’t you?”

She can’t meet his eyes, instead staring at where he’s holding her wrist. “I … I talked about a lot of things,” she mumbles. “It was just talk. I don't even remember half of it. I didn’t … I wasn’t really gonna do anything.”

“Can you show me where you hurt yourself?” Bucky asks, careful to keep his voice gentle. “I want to see how bad it is.”

Mary shivers, shaking her head sadly. Her hair is loose and hanging messy around her face, so Bucky reaches up to tuck it behind her ear. He hears her give a quiet, shaky inhale. “Come on now,” he coaxes. “Let me see.”

For a long moment, it seems like she won’t obey, but then her shoulders sink down and she takes a deep breath and lets it out, whispering a tiny little. “... kay,” as her hands creep down to take hold of the tee shirt she’s wearing. It’s extra large, going all the way to her knees, and it’s all she’s wearing. Bucky doesn’t know if the police brought her in that way, or if it’s something the hospital gave her to put on after being examined, but either way, he schools his expression as she edges the tee shirt up her leg, higher and higher, until it becomes apparent that she is wearing underwear, and she’s bared her hip to him.

Cutting, then.

Bucky looks her over, not as upset by the fresh cuts so much as the old ones. They litter the skin of her upper thigh and hip—some so old they’re scars, some still in various stages of healing. Bucky forces himself not to touch, even though his brain is screaming at him to fix fix fix! There’s nothing here that can be fixed easily—certainly not with a bandaid. Bucky takes a moment to calm himself down before he asks, “How long have you been doing this, honey?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she whispers. She shoves the tee shirt back down and meets his eyes. “Why are you here?”

Moment of truth, Bucky thinks. “The police called me. They got my number from your phone. They wanted to call your Dom to come get you.”

She frowns, looking confused. “But … you’re not—”

“Officer Santiago,” Bucky says quickly, cutting her off. “Could you give us a moment alone please?”

“Sure.” Santiago gets up and takes his bag of cakes with him. “Just a couple’a minutes,” he warns, then steps outside the curtain and pulls it shut. Bucky can see as his shoes walk away.

“You told them you were my Dom?!” Mary hisses.

Bucky looks at her sternly. “No. They assumed I was. You had me in your phone.”

“I … I did?”

Bucky’s mouth quirks. “Yeah, you did.”

“Well that doesn’t mean anything,” she huffs. “I’m not even submissive.”

“I think you know that’s not true,” Bucky says. He reaches up and gathers her hair back in one fist and pulls—gently, just enough to put the barest of pressure on her scalp—forcing her to raise her chin. She visibly reacts to it, softening into his grip, eyes slipping closed and features going slack. “You like that,” Bucky says, making it a statement rather than a question, because it’s obvious she does.

Her eyes open slowly. “S’nothing. It doesn’t mean anything.”

He releases her hair, cupping the back of her neck instead. He grips her firmly in his hand, and this time she nearly moans, lips parting and the sound coming out before she can fully stifle it. Bucky’s mouth curls and he hums. “And that? Is that ‘nothing’ too?”

“Please.” She’s having a hard time maintaining eye contact, which is typical. There’s a little pinch between her eyebrows that’s so sweet and needy, Bucky wants to kiss it. It makes her look like she might cry, and that thrills him too. “Please,” she whispers. “I just wanna go home.”

“You’re not going home, Honey,” he tells her, keeping the grip on her neck steady and petting at her hair with his other hand. She’s going down a little, likely so easily because of the alcohol in her system, because of how deprived she’s been until now. She whines a little at his words and he shushes her. “They won’t let you. You’re either gonna have to let me take you, or else stay here in the hospital, in the psych ward.”

Mary whimpers. “No.”

“Shhh,” he soothes. “I know. I don’t want that for you either, but you have to make the choice. If you want to leave here, then you have to sign the paperwork that gives me custody of you.” He tilts her chin up. “Look at me now, Honey.” She’s sluggish, so it takes a second, but her eyes come up as she obeys. They’re a little glossy, pupils blown wide, and Bucky gives her neck an encouraging squeeze. “Good girl,” he praises.

She practically melts at hearing that. “Please …” she says again. 

Bucky would bet money that she doesn’t know what she’s asking for. He does, though. He knows down to the marrow of his bones what a ‘please’ like that means. “Don’t worry, Doll. I’ll take care of you. I will.” He bends and pecks a kiss to her forehead, then steps away. She makes a weak noise of protest and he shushes her. 

“I’m just gonna go get officer Santiago back. … And my husband, Steve.”

She blinks at the word ‘husband’. “Steve?” she repeats, shoulders shrinking as she pulls into herself. “But—”

“It’s okay,” Bucky promises. “He’s a very nice man. You’ll like him.”

Mary looks unsure. Bucky’s glad she’s down, otherwise he’s fairly certain she’d be arguing by now, maybe even pitching a fit and cursing. Instead, what comes out of her mouth is a hesitant little, “... He’s like you?” 

“No. No he’s not designated. He’s—”

“Normal.” She says it so sadly, sounds so demoralized. Bucky has to fight the urge to correct her, to give her a speech about how, ‘just because they’re designated, it doesn’t make them abnormal’. He bites his tongue. What’s more important right now is that she’s making progress in accepting the reality that she’s almost certainly submissive.

“Yeah,” he says. “Steve’s not like us. But I wanted him to come in here and meet you. Do you think you can do that for me, Sweetie?” The pet names come naturally, are a part of his dynamic as a Dom, and Bucky can tell that she responds favorably to them. “Hm? Answer me, Mary.”

(And of course, the use of her name gets instant attention and obedience.)

“Okay,” she says. “Yes.”

He smiles and gives her a heartfelt, “Good girl,” wanting to show her that he’s pleased, that she’s doing well. “I’m gonna go get him, okay? I’ll be right back.”

Steve

Steve is equal parts excited and nervous to meet the woman Bucky has found, the woman they’re going to be taking care of. … Maybe more, if things work out. 

He holds Bucky’s hand as he’s led back to where the emergency room beds are. Bucky draws back the curtain and Steve sees the cop sitting there, looking bored, … and her.

“Oh,” he breathes. “Hey.”

She’s pretty—which is saying a lot, because that’s Steve’s first thought, despite the state of her. She’s got goo gobs of dark eye makeup that it looks like she put on once she was already drunk, and by now it’s been smeared to kingdom come by tears and her own hands. Her hair sits messy and unbrushed around her shoulders, and her eyes are glazed and tired from a high that’s probably going to wear off soon and leave her looking even more exhausted than she already does. 

“Hey,” Steve says, eyes flicking up and down her body where she’s sitting on the bed. She’s wearing nothing but a big tee shirt, and Steve allows himself one glance down at her shapely legs, then resolutely keeps his eyes trained upwards. She’s a disheveled mess, but even like that, Steve can see how she drew Bucky’s attention, that day in the café.

“Hi,” Mary says.

Steve smiles hopefully. By his side, Bucky squeezes his hand in encouragement, and offers, “Mary, this is Steve, my husband.”

Steve watches her face, curious to know what she thinks of Bucky being married. He’s expecting displeasure maybe, imagining that a submissive would feel jealous or upset, if their prospective Dom was already attached to someone else.

But she seems to stay calm, sitting there and taking Steve in with slow blinks, even looking a little bit shy herself. “... You’re big,” she eventually says. “I thought you’d be smaller than him.”

Steve grins and he hears Bucky’s scoffed, “Size has nothing to do with our dynamic.”

Steve knows he’s got half an inch on Bucky, more muscle mass too, but he’s never felt bigger than his husband. Bucky’s personality, his dominance, is larger than Steve.

Mary’s still staring at him, a thoughtful little pinch between her eyebrows. Steve waits in expectation of a question, but none comes. “What?” he asks. He pulls up the room’s extra plastic chair and sits close to the bed, offering her his hand. He’s surprised when she takes it. Steve stares thoughtfully at his hand as she drags her fingers over his fingers, his palm, still not saying anything. He looks over at Bucky, concerned. “Did they give her drugs?”

Thankfully, Bucky chuckles and shakes his head. “She’s down,” he explains.

Oh. Okay. That’d explain her calm affect. Steve had come in here halfway expecting a screaming hellcat. He hadn’t expected this. He turns back to Mary, giving her a friendly look. “Did you have questions you wanted to ask me?”

She bites her lip, clearly working something out in her head. “Bucky said you two have a ‘dynamic’.”

“He did.”

“But he said you’re normal.”

Steve’s lips thin once he figures out what she means. “We’re all normal,” he scolds. “But no, I don’t have ‘Dominant or Submissive Personality Disorder’, if that’s what you mean.” He puts sarcastic quotes around words to clearly convey his distaste for the classification. He wants her to know how ridiculous he finds it.

“Babe,” Bucky warns quietly from behind. “We’re not getting political right now, okay? Just focus on her, on what we have to do.”

“Right, sorry.” He knows that Bucky’s right, so he tries again, telling Mary, “I’m ‘normal’, but Bucky and I still have a very intimate relationship together. We’re husbands. So yeah, we’ve developed our own dynamic. When I’m with him I tend to follow his lead, so to speak.” He smiles and shrugs. “It works for us.”

Mary looks like she’s thinking this new information over. There’s a slowness to her, a dreaminess in her expressions and her reactions.Steve figures it’s a combination of her being down, and not being sober. In fact, he can smell the vodka leaking out of her pores. It’s actually pretty horrible. “So does that make sense?” he prods her gently. “Mary?”

“… Yeah, I think so.” She eyes him up and down, looking back and forth between him and Bucky. “What will you do?” she asks Steve. She blushes a little from asking the question, so he deduces that she’s asking what he’ll do with her; what their dynamic together will be, outside of her and Bucky.

“I’ll take care of you,” he says, because that’s all he knows for sure, and he wants her to feel safe. Steve knows that it’s absolutely crucial for this woman to feel safe right now, if they’re going to take her home with them. “Bucky and I both will.” He holds her hand—the one that isn’t cuffed to the bed—enveloping it between his. “It’ll be much better than staying here,” he promises. “You’ll be so safe. And much happier.”

Mary’s body draws in, seems to actually get smaller as she pulls back into herself. “I’m never happy,” she says mournfully. It hurts Steve’s heart to see it, so he knows it must be killing Bucky, given his overly protective instincts. Steve glances over at him. “Babe?”

Bucky has a clipboard full of papers, which Steve knows must be the custody orders. “Here, Honey,” he tells Mary, handing her the clipboard and the pen. “This is what you have to sign to be able to come home with us.”

It kind of bothers Steve that Bucky doesn’t encourage her to read through the documents more thoroughly, but he doesn’t say anything because he knows they have only the best intentions for her. She’ll be safe with them. He watches as she signs her signature in the places Bucky points out, trying to scan some of the fine print as she goes. Anxiety is written across her face and she starts to bite at the chapped skin on her bottom lip. “But, um … what if I’m not what you think?” she worried, not looking at either of them. 

Bucky pets her hair and reassures her. “You are, sweetheart. Trust me. And we’re gonna take you to a therapist anyway, to get an official diagnosis.”

Normally Steve would be scoffing at the word “diagnosis,” but he’s too busy watching the two of them together. There’s a strange feeling in his gut, at seeing his husband touch Mary like that, at hearing him call her pet names and calmly take control of her. Steve’s never seen Bucky dom another person before, and he … he kind of doesn’t hate it. In fact, it’s actually making him feel all the more attracted to Bucky, and curious about Mary. Like he wants to help, wants to get to know her.

She signs the rest of the documents without making a fuss, so Steve figures he’ll be getting that chance.

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[demonqueenart]

im just gonna be so genuine and say i love you but i dont understand what racist remarks you're talking about and it's really frustrating for me to hear people talk about this like its so serious when i havent seen anything at all thats bad. im white so i think i may have genuinely missed things but could you please just give me some examples? i really am trying to understand where you guys are coming from its just getting hard because everyone is just getting mad at each other whenever they talk about it. i know people are mad bc of something dan said about not being able to come on tour to third world countries and possibly something he said in like 2011 when he was in his crazy fake tan phase? i just really am not seeing anything here that i think would get people so worked up and i would love to understand better

Hey anon, I understand where you coming from. And I really appreciate you trying to understand better.

To be really honest, why things have blown up now is because of the upcoming tour. It’s not really about why they couldn’t go to the other continents when they’re planning to do 32 shows in US, even though that’s also fishy af cause they could’ve easily dipped into Mexico, and the route they using feels like they’re avoiding latam specifically. The way that they handled this with poc fans is the problem, because while they’re being excited from the tour or whatever, they have not once tried to explain why they couldn’t go to poc fans (or the majority of us that is. Some of us might live somewhere else.)

The way they keep retweeting and being hyped about the tour, while basically intentionally avoiding talking to us is just.. it hurts. Most of us complain about this, and even more expressing how they just need dnp to give them an explanation. But never once did they do it. Instead, they even launch more trailer lol. And I know they saw it, there’s a lot of us and they like snooping on social media anyway. It makes us feel like we’re not part of the tour, that it wasn’t meant for us. And it was actually the first time I questioned if I was really a part of this community at all.

Turning back to phandom with that state of mind, it can feel like everyone is abandoning you. Because just like dnp, everyone is only talking about the tour, and not about how this exclusion needs to be addressed. It’s understandable why people would feel angry when they just keep being ignored like their voices didn’t matter. But I know now, just because people didn’t interact with me, doesn’t mean they didn’t want to be there for me. We just might come from a different place. (Btw, if you’re western and you have poc friends who’s affected by this, please reach out to them. The reason why I’m still here rn is because of all my friends, western friends included, saying they’ll be there for me throughout this racism thing. They might be angry and hurt, and even assume the worst of you. And I won’t ask more than you can do. But saying you understand (or at least empathize the situation they’re in) and that you will support them no matter what, will help them a lot.)

Dan clearly carry a micro aggression around latam, and the fact that this still occur in wad really says a lot about how they’ve not grown from that. When dan said brazil and mexico were 3rd world country on was, that makes us feel like he’s looking down on us. And the fact that they have avoided latam specifically without giving any reason why they couldn’t go, well, there’s only so many things you can assume is happening under the surface. This makes us feel like they’re looking down on us, and that they’ve never seen their poc fans as equals.

The reason why the old stuff was brought up is because this isn’t the first time this has happened. Dan has made a lot of racist remarks, and while it’s understandable to slip up from time to time, and even more understandable why he might be afraid to actually apologize and own things up, it doesn’t excuse the patterns that are being repeated here. When he doesn’t take accountability to his past mistakes and keep repeating the patterns of racism and exclusion, that indicates he’s going to keep oppressing us forever without ever acknowledging it. And THAT is not okay.

We don’t want to cancel them, never once do we want that. We only want dnp to hear us and actually talk to us about this. They are not beyond redemption, but it’s going to be hard for them to open up considering the past fifteen years of them not doing that. So the only thing we can do at this point is to be more opened up about their racist remarks. We’re bringing up past mistakes now, because there’re still a lot of people who have been affected by this, and them not bringing it up is not going to make all that hurt go away. So I suggest, we should bring it up, not to cancel them or demonize them! But to acknowledge it exists so that we can heal from it. We can learn to love dnp despite being flawed, and normalize how to take accountability to make this place safer for poc. These voices can’t be avoided because that’s also a form of exclusion in this community. I want everyone to feel welcomed here, so I’ll listen to their voices when they need it. That way, there will be a place for poc to belong in this space. We can learn to include each other in, or at least I hope so :3

*also, this will be very funny if this ask turns out to be dnp, but whatever lol xD Hope we can catch up someday whoever you are (✿˵ ꒡3꒡˵)৴♡*

[traveler-at-heart]

Finding Home - Part 2

Summary: This is a series imagining what it was life for Natasha after joining S.H.I.E.L.D. Warnings: Mentions of violence, PTSD, nightmares. Read Part 1 here. It was still dark. A quick glance at the clock on your nightstand told you it was indeed 2:30 am.

With a groan, you stood up from bed, walking into the living room, the penthouse pitch black.

“Jesus, Natasha!” you jumped as the lights revealed her sitting on the couch. Staring at the door. The redhead didn’t even flinch when you shouted. “Hey, is everything ok? Did you hear something?”

Now you felt bad for snapping at her like that. Surely, she had a good reason to be up.

“I don’t understand why they’re not here”

“Who?” you kneeled next to her, so you were eye level. With a pang of guilt, you noticed the bags under her eyes.

How long had this been going on?

“The KGB and Dreykov’s people. It’s only a matter of time. And when they come, I don’t… they can’t hurt you. I wouldn’t forgive myself”

“Nat” you said, squeezing her hand until she finally looked at you. Your hair was a mess, and your eyes struggled to focus on her face, but still, you pushed the words out.

“We are protecting you. SHIELD has eyes and ears everywhere. They won’t come for you, they won’t hurt you. Clint won’t let it happen, Fury won’t let it happen. And I certainly won’t let it happen”

There was a beat of silence, and then Natasha shook her head no.

“I’m not worth the risk”

“Yes you are. Clint thought so when he didn’t shoot that arrow. And I think so too. You’re worth it, and that’s not up for debate”

With a resigned sigh, you sat on the loveseat next to the couch and stared at the door.

“What are you doing?” Natasha asked.

“Well, if we’re taking turns watching the door, I’m next”

“Don’t be ridiculous, go to sleep”

The commanding tone made you smile. Slowly, but surely, Natasha had become more open and more herself in the way she interacted with others.

She wasn’t afraid to show she knew better than all of you.

“You go to sleep, Romanoff”

The redhead rolled her eyes, annnoyed at how amused you looked and then turned on the tv, browsing through channels, until she settled on a documentary about chimpanzees.

Fifteen minutes later, she was sleeping, gently snoring.

—

Back at the headquarters, Natasha was showing Maria and Fury some of the technical details of the widow bites she used.

You took the opportunity to pay a visit to Doctor Taylor.

“Agent” she greeted. “You know the rules, you gotta make an appointment”

“It won’t take long, Doc. It’s about Natasha” you scratched the back of your neck, feeling like you were snitching on her. “She’s not sleeping well. Keeps thinking the KGB is showing up any minute now to take her back”

“I would be surprised if she was able to sleep at all. I can prescribe something…”

“Yeah, she’s not gonna take it. Don’t ask me how, I just know it” you shrugged your shoulders. “This is more of a visit to ask for sugggestions. Is there any activity that might distract her?”

“Well, has she even been outside the Penthouse?” the woman asked, glancing at her notes, obviously aware of the answer to the question.

“No, unless we count this lovely government building” you looked down, feeling ashamed. Idiot. Keeping Natasha locked up, of course she’d feel agitated.

Doctor Taylor said your name, your attention snapping back to her.

“Natasha doesn’t know who she is; she dind’t have a childhood or a life. You could… give her choices. Help her figure out what she likes”

“Like her favorite ice cream flavor?”

“Sure, that’s simple. Start there”

“Alright” you straightened your stance, thinking about the day ahead. “Thanks, Doc”

“For what is worth” she said as you turned to open the door. “Natasha’s making progress. Slow but steady. And that’s thanks to you as well”

You nodded, smiling before leaving her office.

—

“It’s this way” Natasha pointed at a street, and you kept driving. “You missed the next exit”

“So now you know how to drive in New York City?” you said, ignoring her comments.

“Yes. I can drive motorcycles, cars, all kinds of helicopters…”

“Cool, congrats. You’re still not driving this car”

“Ass” she mumbled and you chuckled.

The drive was silent and as you found a place to park, Natasha looked around trying to find your destination.

“Ta-da” you sang and she turned back to you.

“Holey cream?” she read the sign above the door, in a very unamused tone.

“Build-your-own donut ice cream sandwich. Doesn’t that sound fun? There are tons of choices. Come on” you looped her arm with yours and practically dragged her inside.

You ordered first, hoping it would give Natasha enough time to decide what she wanted. However, as you got your donut, she was still staring at the ice cream flavors and toppings.

“Have you decided yet?” as she shook her head no, you offered your own donut. “Come on, try it. It’s homemade chocolate peanut better”

Rolling her eyes, she finally agreed and took a bite, modestly covering her mouth as she chewed.

“Too sweet. I think I’ll have the Java Guatemala”

“Holy holey” you muttered, thinking about the amount of caffeine she’d eat. “Strong flavor for a strong woman, am I right?”

“Is the sugar making you hyper?”

“Maybe” you opened the door for her, walking side by side as you took bites of your donuts.

You kept walking, glancing at the restaurants and shops littered on both sides of the street. As you read the menu of an Indian place, Natasha looked at the window of a clothing store.

“Oh, that leather jacket is beautiful” you admired, following her eyes. “Wanna go inside and try it on?”

“No”

“Come on” you ignored, pushing her.

The store clerk greeted you, while Natasha stood awkardly next to the jacket.

“Try it on” she rolled her eyes, but did as she was told. It looked perfect on her, but then again, Natasha managed to look stunning even on training clothes. “It suits you. Do you like it?”

“It’s fine” she shrugged her shoulders, the same way she did when you cooked something that she didn’t really like. As if what she thought wasn’t important.

“Natasha” you said and the woman looked at you. You raised your eyebrows and smiled, encouraging her to say what she really wanted.

“Yes, I like it a lot. But I don’t have any mo…”

“Miss? We’re taking this jacket”

Busy with paying the woman, you missed the way Natasha pulled the jacket close to her body, smiling as she saw her reflection in the mirror.

—

“Article 212, subsection B” Natasha asked.

It was a lovely day, so you were enyoing the sun on Central Park. She insisted on studying for her test, which was honestly overdoing it. Natasha memorized Shields rules in a week.

She was siting, the manual on her lap, while you were laying, your head close to her knees.

“Uh… something, something, paperwork” you answered, getting lost in the warm sun and the blanket where you and Natasha rested. “Are we still catching that movie later today?”

“Yes. And don’t change the subject” she gave you a small tap on the forehead and you frowned.

“Natasha, you memorized it weeks ago. And I already passed my test so…”

“I like it when I can hear you say it” Natasha interrupted you, her voice getting smaller. “I know all the words, yes. But hearing you say it makes it make sense. And I can also learn more about pronunciation. I still have my stupid accent”

“Ok” you nodded, sitting up to face her. You shook the leaves that got stuck in your hair and answered the question.

Natasha nodded when she was satisfied, flipping through the pages to continue.

“And for the record, your accent is not stupid. It’s cute” you said.

You were too busy looking away to hide your blush, so you missed how Natasha’s cheeks were red as well.

—

After that day in the park, you saved a time after dinner to read to Natasha. It was a way for her to improve what you already thought was a perfect English.

“A Scandal in Bohemia. Your very first Sherlock Holmes. Aren’t you excited?”

“Why that one?” she looked up at you. As usual, you were sitting at the end of the couch while she laid her head close to your lap, but never touching your knees.

“Because, you’re just like Irene Adler”

“Who?”

“Well, let me read and you’ll find out”

With every story about mystery, Natasha always commented on how the detectives approcahed the case. But this time, she remained quiet as you read the tale of Holmes and the only woman who outsmarted him.

Once you finished, you looked down to find Natasha sleeping, her usual frown replaced by a soft expression. The image of her head resting under her clasped hands brought you back to the words on the Red Room report.

The girls slept handcuffed to their beds so they wouldn’t escape.

If Dreykov wasn’t already dead, you’d gladly kill him yourself.

On impulse, your hand reached out to touch her own, while the other moved a strand of red hair out of her forehead.

What happened next was completely unexpected.

Natasha woke up instantly, throwing you from the couch and you landed on your front, out of air from the force of her movements. The woman climbed to your back and placed your neck in a headlock.

“Fuck, fuck, Nat, it’s ok. I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I didn’t think, I’m sorry. It’s me. You’re safe” you said, trying to control your breathing and keeping your voice even.

You could feel Natasha’s heart beating wildly, her breath ragged against your ear.

It wasn’t her and she wasn’t trying to hurt you, that’s all you could think about as she kept you in place, with just enough pressure to make sure you didn’t move.

Little by little, she began to calm down and all of the sudden, let you go.

You coughed and moved forward, allowing yourself to breathe and feel a tiny bit of panic at what could have happened.

Not to you, but to Natasha.

“I’m…” she looked at her shaking hands, tears welling up. Natasha got up and walked to her room, slamming the door shut behind her.

“Nat. It’s ok. Natasha” you knocked several times, to no avail.

She stayed in her room for the rest of the night.

—

The following days were hell.

You went back to training alone. Natasha barely ate, let alone look at you whenever you had to go to SHIELD.

How could you have been so reckless? Of course she’d react that way, living her life in a perpetual state of fight or flight.

The silence took a toll on you. And worse, one day it made you snap.

During the drive to SHIELD, you asked Natasha if she was up for watching a movie at the cinema.

There was no answer, which was to be expected.

The hurt came after, when you caught her chatting with Clint as if everything was ok. Feeling as if someone had punched you in the gut, you looked away.

Maybe everything would be better if you left Natasha alone.

You walked up to them and dropped the keys to the car on the table.

“Here. Take the car”

“But, I thought…”

“I’m walking” was all you answered, turning around to leave the building.

You felt a combination of guilt and anger. You hated how you snapped at her, how your response to her trauma was to be vindictive and unreasonable.

But you also felt tired and way over your head. It wasn’t like you’d been an agent for that long.

Maybe someone more experienced would do better, like Barton.

You found a bar and stayed there for a couple of hours, drinking on an empty stomach. You came back when it was too cold to wander around the city.

The alcohol had hit you harder than you thought, because when you opened your eyes it was noon.

Natasha was long gone by then.

The sight of pancakes on the stove and a note with your name made you want to cry.

You didn’t even know what you were doing at SHIELD headquarters that morning, but still stepped out of the cab and into the building.

“Agent Y/N” Fury said as you walked down the hallway.

It was the last voice you wanted to hear, sporting a massive hangover and a guilt ridden heart.

“Director Fury” you turned around, trying to sound composed.

“There’s a mission”

Missions were at the bottom of your list right now.

“Ask Maria” you snapped.

You fucked up.

“I’m not asking”

“I can’t leave Natasha now”

“She’s joining the mission”

“I don’t think she’s ready” you panicked, imagining her getting hurt over your mistakes.

“It’s been three months. I have to know if she’s at least worth the groceries we’re buying for you in that fancy penthouse in the Upper East Side, Agent” the door behind your back opened. Fury looked at you one last time and then nodded. “That would be all”

As you turned around, Natasha’s eyes met yours.

“I didn’t know if I should wake you…”

“It’s ok. I’m sorry, I slept in. Thanks for the pancakes. I’ll go back to the penthouse… I don’t know why I came here today”

“Ok. I have to stay and go over some stuff” she explained and you nodded.

“See you later”

Back home (it wasn’t really home, was it?), you headed straight for the gym. Correction, bathroom, to throw up, still hungover and then to the gym.

Natasha joined you an hour later, waiting for you to finish punching out your frustrations against a boxing bag.

“I’m sorry” she said, after a particularly hard punch that made you grunt. “I understand if you asked Fury to leave”

“Leave… what?” you turned to her, confused. “And why are you saying you’re sorry?”

“You know why” she said, looking down.

“That wasn’t your fault. None of this is your fault, Natasha. I should have known better. I should have protected you. You should feel safe and I’m failing”

“You didn’t fail” she insisted. “You didn’t do anything wrong. I have. All my life, I’ve hurt and killed. But you know all that, you know it and you’re still not mad. Why aren’t you mad? Why don’t you think I’m a monster?” she said, looking anywhere but you.

“Did you have a choice?” you asked softly. She didn’t reply. “All I know is, the first time someone gave you a choice, you did the right thing”

“And I still hurt people”

“Yeah, our line of work isn’t really black and white, Natasha” you felt relieved when she finally looked at you, though her eyes were reddened. “If you had a choice now, what would you say? ”

“I think… I’d like to help people”

You smiled, not surprised by her answer. Of course she’d want to help. How you wished Natasha could see herself in the way you saw her.

“Good. Because Fury is eager to send us on a mission. Maybe this is a chance. You can save lives, do what’s right”

“I’d like that”

“You have a choice, know that. If you don’t feel ready, I will fight tooth and nail against Fury. Rip that eye patch if I have to”

Natasha smiled at that, and you could float with how relieved you felt. Maybe things could be better after all.

“I’ll start working on dinner” she offered after a beat of silence and you nodded.

Quietly, she exited the gym. The room felt empty again. And as much as you wanted to reach out to her, hold her hand or be closer, like you were before, you’d let her be.

Maybe one day, she’d meet you halfway

[seabirdtxt]

Consecuto Divinum

Scaramouche has touched true divinity, and flexed his abilities to their current limits. He must deal with the consequences, however permanent or temporary. [p1] [p2] [p3 - you are here!]

Notes: Genshin SAGAU, cult au. picks up directly after part 2. Interlude chapter: this is mostly focused on the aftermath of Scara's connection.

WC. 1.3k

----- ⚘ -----

“What do you mean?” Scaramouche bites, feeling the pounding in his head getting more unbearable. “What do you mean, ‘I can hear them’?”

“Well,” the Traveler’s voice is tinny and distant. “You can hear the Creator’s voice, right? Can you… Understand them?”

At this, Scaramouche frowns. “Are you saying that you can hear them, but you don’t understand them?”

The Traveler nods, sheepish and wary. “When they speak, it feels like an unbearable pressure in my chest and my head,” they tell him, cupping one hand over their ear as they shake their head, as if trying to clear the very sensation they’re describing. “An overwhelming weight, pressing down on me from all sides… Like a sense of foreboding, almost. I can only glean a general sense of their emotions, but never words…”

“That sounds like a ‘you’ problem,” Scaramouche states, feeling a deep satisfaction that only he, and not even your supposed vessel upon Teyvat, is blessed with the understanding of your speech. “I’m afraid I can’t help you if you’re too weak to withstand the unfathomable power of that connection.”

The Traveler scowls. “And here I thought maybe talking to the Creator would have made you less of a jerk.” 

Scaramouche waves them off, already losing interest. He takes a tentative step forward in this bizarre dreamscape, testing the limits of his projection. To his delight, he can move and even touch things in this half-world, his palm brushing over the verdant leaves of the pavilion's flora. 

“What are you doing? Stay where you are!” The Traveler says, their sword drawn and pointing at him. Scaramouche only laughs at the pitiful display.

“You think you’re gonna hurt me? You’re gonna cut me down?” He laughs, cruel and mocking. Without warning, he rushes forward and grabs the Traveler by the front of their stupid outfit, a wide, sadistic smile on his face. “Better make it count, my friend.”

With a cry of surprise, the Traveler swings with their weapon, eyes panicked as they watch the blade slide through Scaramouche’s body as if he didn’t even exist. The puppet laughs harder, letting go of the Traveler’s shirt and covers his face with his hand.

“Ha! Haha! Amazing! You outdid yourself with that one, really you did.” He mocks with a sing-song tone. “You see, that’s the difference between you and I.”

He steps into the Traveler’s space again, bringing their faces close enough that he can make out the golden flecks in their eyes.

“You may be favoured by a god,” he tells them, a saccharine smile spread across his lips as the Traveler stumbles away, hastily putting distance between them. He bursts once more into sharp laughter. “... but I am one!” 

“Balladeer, your nose…” The Traveler’s expression is strange, almost concerned, as they point with a shaking hand at his face.

“... huh?” 

Scaramouche stops laughing, confusion overtaking him as he feels something sliding down his chin. He touches his face softly, feeling moisture. When he pulls his hand away, he sees dark red and purple blood staining his fingers.

That’s when the world goes dark.

----- ⚘ -----

Scaramouche comes to with the sound of distant, muffled shouting ringing in his head. And isn’t that a strange sensation? Being a puppet, falling unconscious is an occurrence that had never happened to him before.

With a groan, he shakes his head to clear that bizarre foggy sensation. Someone shouts again, and Scaramouche grumbles at the sound.

“Good morning, Lord Balladeer,” a patronizing voice filters in through the noise. “I see you’ve decided to rejoin us in the land of the living.” 

“... five more minutes.” Scaramouche retorts, brown furrowing at how slurred his speech is. He raises his head to look at the Doctor, who loses patience at his sluggish movement and grabs the puppet’s chin roughly, turning his head this way and that. Scaramouche bears the humiliating inspection with a grimace.

“I see you haven't completely lost your faculties,” Dottore remarks, tongue clicking. “A shame, really, I could’ve done with more silent compliance from you.” 

“What happened?” Scaramouche asks, eager to conclude whatever business the Doctor has with him.

“Why don’t you tell me?” Dottore frowns, dropping Scaramouche’s chin and letting the puppet’s head fall unceremoniously. Scaramouche fights to hide the wince at the jarring movement, and lifts his head of his own volition to look at the taller man. “I let you have your fun with the god-machine, and in return I hear you terrorized my technicians, damaged the interior of the cockpit, and passed out for several hours, completely unresponsive. Dead to the world, really. You’re lucky I like you so much, dear Balladeer, else I might’ve let you waste away in that tin can of yours and saved all of us the trouble of having to deal with you.” 

Scaramouche snorts and spits a clot of red-purple blood on the floor at Dottore’s feet. “Good luck finding someone else who can withstand the raw power of the gnosis, then,” he sneers, meeting the Doctor’s eyes through his stupid mask. “Nobody else can do what I do, and you know it.”

Dottore’s frown deepens and his lips press into a tight line. “Be that as it may, it will do you no good to permanently damage yourself or the machine before it is time to officially launch.” Dottore straightens, and gestures to the gaggle of technicians. “Unhook him.” 

“Wait- no!” Scaramouche thrashes and tries to push the prying hands away from him, but his body is still weak from his recent mishap. He can only let it happen as the tubes are disconnected from him, their absence starkly felt as each socket comes apart. When everything is disconnected, he is slowly lowered to a stretcher and laid out, his arms and legs shackled to prevent him from lashing out again.

The Doctor retrieves a handkerchief from his pocket and leans over Scaramouche’s prone body, using the cloth to wipe his face in a mockery of gentleness. The white fabric is stained with the marbled blood. 

“Looks like you need more practice before you are fully, how did you put it? Attuned to your god-machine.” Dottore smiles, all teeth. “My technicians have offered to bring you to your room, quite generous of them given the amount of repair work you’ve left for them to do on your behalf. You can behave yourself for a day or two, right?” 

Scaramouche doesn’t answer, only gives a tight, forced smile as the technicians lift the stretcher and carry him away. The Doctor gives a few more orders as Scaramouche is carried away, but the sound quickly blurs from his mind.

He doesn’t quite register when the technicians drop him off at his room (and isn’t that concerning?) where he jolts to consciousness in his own bed, having been changed out of the clothes he’d been wearing for three days and into a fresh, simple black kimono. Dottore is sentimental that way, in a pitifully human way, and stocked Scaramouche’s rooms under the assumption that he holds some sort of attachment to the land of his creation.

Disgruntled, Scaramouche forces himself to sit up and take stock. His face and skin are clean, likely in thanks to whichever technician cleaned up his clothes. There is an unholy pounding in his head, and he wonders if his databank took damage from the connection with the Creator. Lastly, despite being disconnected from the Shouki no Kami, Scaramouche can still feel the liquid energy pulsing through his system. 

He holds his hand out in front of him, flexing it and turning it over, as he reaches for that half-world again. It takes a few false starts, but that discoloured suspension in time answers him once again, tinting his vision in grey. An animalistic grin takes over his face as he reaches through time and space once more and reaches for You.

[steddieunderdogfics]

This week’s writer spotlight feature is: @thefreakandthehair! With thirty-nine works in the Steve/Eddie and Stranger Things tags on Archive of our Own!

In an underdogfics first, we have TWO nominators!

Our first nominator recommends the following works by @thefreakandthehair:

this is my month, I can feel it. october, baby!

never been afraid of any deviation.

scar-crossed lovers.

the answers are all inside of this.

Our second nominator, @sidekick-hero, recommends the following works by @thefreakandthehair:

over the hills and far away

meeting you was coming home.

make no plans and none can be broken.

rounding third, sliding home.

what's mine is yours (to leave or take)

Lex's brain is full of very creative scenarios, reading her writing is like reading an anthology of short stories but it's with all of your favorite characters! You get to see what they'd do in this AU or that AU, I love the exploration. It's like she's made a stew and it's simmering on the stove and you realize you're so hungry for stew as soon as you see it. <3 -- anonymous

Lex writes characters that come to life on the page while you're reading her stories. It makes it so easy to get invested in them, to feel with them and root for them to get their happy ending. She's one of these authors I would follow anywhere, any trope, any setting and universe, I am here for it. So I think more people should get to find her stories and be treated to the magic. -- @sidekick-hero

Below the cut, @thefreakandthehair answered some questions about their writing process and some of their recommended work!

Why do you write Steddie?

How can I possibly give just one reason! These two burrowed themselves into my brain like little gerbils with no hope of ever getting them out. I mean, was I supposed to hear ‘dontcha big boy?’ and be normal about it? But in all seriousness, they’re two sides of the same coin and those oppositions in character are super fun to play with!

What’s your favorite trope to READ?

It was tough to choose, but friends to lovers keeps coming up!

What’s your favorite trope to WRITE?

If I have to choose a particular trope, hurt/comfort would be the closest fit, but in the sense of healing past hurts together as a unit.

What’s your favorite Steddie fic?

This question sent me into an existential crisis and the best I could do is narrow it down to three, and even that was nearly impossible. In no particular order: We’ll Know For The First Time by KikiZ; carve your name into my chest by hexiewrites; and more recently, Among the Wildflowers by ParadimeShifts.

Is there a trope you’re excited to explore in a future work but haven’t yet?

Rivals to Lovers in my football AU! I’ve been so excited to get moving on that one.

What is your writing process like?

Oh, I wish I had a better one. I start with a skeleton outline, pop on some music, and then pick and choose which part of the outline sparks joy in that moment. I rarely, if ever, write chronologically so I just write what feels good in the moment and then go back with a scalpel to create connective tissue.

Do you have any writing quirks?

Definitely writing out of order, I think! And if there’s one thing about me, it’s that someone is gonna have an introspective moment looking up at the stars. Someone told me it’s like my calling card and they’re not wrong.

Do you prefer posting when you’ve finished writing or on a schedule?

I like a bit of both. I like to post on a schedule for multi-chapter fics but only after it’s either completely done or mostly done so that there’s no pressure to it.

Which fic are you most proud of?

Over The Hills And Far Away incorporated some personal bits of my past that were equal parts cathartic and difficult to write at times, so I’d have to say that one! It’s really satisfying to take experiences that you regret or that didn’t end the way you’d hoped and give them a different ending in fiction.

How did you get the idea for never been afraid of any deviation?

The Eddie Month prompt for that day! Me and my co-mod for the event, nostalgicbones, included Bad Reputation by Joan Jett as a prompt and as I was listening to it, it got me thinking about how Eddie is someone who cares for those in less than ideal situations— maybe even to the point of weaponizing his own bad reputation to protect someone. In this case, that was Steve!

When writing the answers are all inside of this, what was something you didn’t expect?

I didn’t expect it to become multiple chapters! That one is part of my So Much For Stardust series (that I haven’t forgotten about, I’ve just been busy with big bangs) so it was based on The Pink Seashell interlude from the album. I still don’t know exactly how a 1-minute interlude turned into a 15k multi-chapter fic, but it was super fun to let go off the rails!

What inspired scar-crossed lovers?

Also a So Much For Stardust series fic, the first one in the series, actually. I heard Heaven, Iowa for the first time and wrote this based on that song in a day. My brain just kept rotating it around like a rotisserie chicken until I wrote it.

What was your favorite part to write from scar-crossed lovers?

This is ironic because I’m not an angst-writer by nature, but writing about the slow deterioration of Eddie’s van as a symbol for the passage of time was really fun to do. Bittersweet, but it was one of those things that I didn’t realize I was doing until I was in the middle of it and once I realized, I just carried it throughout!

How do/did you feel writing never been afraid of any deviation.?

Excited! It was the first time that I wrote pre-s4 steddie (which is wild that in two years, I just wrote that for the first time last fall?) and it was so fun to do!

What was the most difficult part of writing the answers are all inside of this.?

Probably balancing the kids’ voices in the first chapter while still creating tension between Steve and Eddie.

Do you have a favorite scene and/or line from any of your fics?

It isn’t one of the fics listed here, but in no better version I could pretend to be tonight, I loved writing the line “Something about Steve feels like home, and Eddie is only familiar with houses.” Hurt/comfort, my beloved.

Do you have any upcoming projects or fics you’d like to share/promote?

I’m planning on taking a break from big bangs for a bit to focus on some super neglected WIPs, so there are a few upcoming fics I’m excited about! My Football AU, an ASMR Artist!Eddie x Insomniac!Steve AU, and I’m working on a fic called Pickup Note with sidekick-hero and firefly-party that I cannot wait to dive into fully.

Outside of these questions, Is there anything YOU would like to add?

Just thank you so much for all that you do with this blog! The ship truly exploded overnight and there are so many incredible stories that I’ve completely missed just because they’ve fallen through the cracks. I really appreciate what you’re doing here and the undertaking that it’s been!

Thank you to our author, @thefreakandthehair, and our nominators, anonymous and @sidekick-hero! See more of @thefreakandthehair works featured on our page throughout the day!

Writer’s Spotlight is every Wednesday! Want to nominate an author? You can nominate them here!

[ninja-knox-ur-sox-off]

ALRIGHTY IT’S BEEN A HOT SECOND BUT WE ARE BACK LADIES AND GENTLEMEN BOIS AND LASSES LADS AND FOLKS ITS KNOX REACTS TIME AND AHA AHAHAHA OH B O Y HERE WE GO

Knox reacts to Monkie Kid season 5 episode 1

lmk s5 spoilers ahead

so like, to start off, little disclaimer, i don’t know how i’m gonna do with the animation, so bear with me, my brain still hasn’t accepted that this isn’t just new fan animation or something I’m gonna TRY and do my BEST to keep comments on the animation to a minimum but i can make no promises, I watched the first like, ten seconds to make sure the sound was working and I gotta say folks, it hurt me puppet animation is not my vibe I miss 2D heck lego godspeed wildbrain. So yeah, just heads up on that, I shall do my best simple to react to the voice acting and plot, humour, all that kinda stuff HERE WE GO

NAH BRO I’M AFRAID TO PRESS PLAY WHAT DO I DO I’M JUST SITTING HERE

I KEEP LOOKING AT THIS BLANK WHITE SCREEN AAAAAAA

Okayokay keep it together knox u got this you got this it’s just more monkie kid, we’re normal about monkie kid <— is not the least bit normal about monkie kid

on an unrelated side-note my computer keeps autocorrecting monkie to monkey and i’m two seconds from strangling it OKAYBEFOREIPSYCHMYSELFOUTAGAINLETSGO

o u gh

theme song i’m on my hands and knees

Flying Bark i miss YOUUUU WAILS WAILS WAILS WILASGFAWE OH GODS WHAT IS THIS

Hi welcome back to Knox pausing this every four seconds here’s the pre-episode reaction of me reacting to the trailer if you’ve been here a while you probably saw this coming COUGHS HACKS SNEEZES

Okay going back. So, flying bark bits </3 breaking my heart I’m FINE as you can see i totally don’t want to break down lego’s front door and beg for them to accommodate flying back pay them better and give less insane deadlines so i can have them back what are you talking about—

Because we are here for the voice acting and stuff I will NOT make commentary on the still frames in the theme song i will NOT

OKAY SPEED ANALYSIS. Everybody’s intros look p basic, so nothing huge going on yet for personal arcs probably gonna mainly focus on mk and ohhh haha right right circlet right yes, mac and wukong cool beans yeah, I like the little snark monkey king has going on good for him, I am not used to seeing Macaque who’s not animated by animators who sold their souls to make him look like he’s a shiny rock. I’m already pointing and laughing at Nezha, angsty looking fool AND HEYYY THAT’S HIS DAD FROM THE TRAILERRRR WASSUP OLD MAN WHY ARE YOU STANDING LIKE THAT—no comment on all the glowy blue light. Ohhhhh mysterious cloaked figure has teeth now, smiling like that? Gotcha macaque-ish figure. Smug fella? Charismatic? I dunno i’m guessing here, WILL THEY PLAY A BIGGER PART???? WHO KNOWS. PROBABLY. They in the theme song ofc they’re gonna play a bigger part what am i talking about ALRIGHT. Okay lots of eyes, whole lotta eyes. Saw this clip in before i think?? Was it in the trailer? Maybe someone sent it to me, not sure. MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM They’ve used that tilted angle twice now, like Mk in the middle with the floor tilted under him. …squints. Eh, no comment, if you want my thoughts on all that junk lemme know I’ll make a separate post where I will probably spend 90% of the time wailing about Flying Bark— [gets hit by a chair]

[REDACTED]

Anyway

Cool cool, giant flaming bird phoenix thing, I don’t know enough mythology anymore to identify what that might be i’ma be real with y’all I used to know a lot more than i do now my brain is EMPTY. Ooookaaayyyy, Turtle, Tiger, Dragon. Sure sure. I don’t know whats going on—

Mmmmmmmm stones…….. what were some theories about these onessssss, something about pillars and holding up the universe? I honestly don’t remember wowza say goodbye to the universe ig ALTHOUGH HEY, I do love the aesthetic of floaty rocks around to show power or whatever, I’ve been drawing Mei with the Samdhi fire rings hovering around her in my notebook and sketches and stuff for AGES, so that’s really neat I do like that I can tell there might be a lot of cool art pieces (at least from me maybe) coming out of that!

MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM heeeeeeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy Nuuuuuwwwaaaaaaaaaaaaa hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii a h a h e y I’m sure everything is gonna be fine. I like that her face is shadowed so we don’t know where she’s at i hope she’s impartial i would love that genuinely um MK WEAPON???? REMEMBER THAT??

I’m sure this will not lead to anything in the future ever

Right, and then a uh, multi-headed… thing—oh is that like medusa air on that creature? Is it a snake or a bird? eh, i’m sure i’ll find out eventually maybe its a snake bird, a snake that absorbs that fire bird at the start or something OHHH OR MAYBE THAT TURTLE TOO? HEY CAN YOU LIKE NOM ALL THOSE ANIMALS AND GET THEIR POWERS?? THAT WOULD BE INTERESTING— sorry ahem, theory territory we’re here for reactions MOVING ON—oh

OH THAT’S A WHOLE PILLER. THAT IS. A WHOLE PILLER OF THE UNIVERSE. ISNT’ IT. Dear gods what am I walking into.

Ough <— paused on the end of the theme song

Pigsy my beloved <3 I’ve been staring at him for three minutes. Whoever drew Pigsy standing there with his arms crossed in the theme song… ily <3

OKAY RIGHT, BACK TO IT.

THEM SONG IS OVER, I’VE MANAGED TO STAY NORMAL AND KEEP ANIMATION COMMENTS TO MYSELF LETS GET THIS ROLLING!

MMMMM STRINGS THAT BIND.

.

I DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS SO IMA JUST PRESS PLAY

:(

The um… the expressions don’t match the…voice act..ing…. MMMMMMMMMMMdunnoificandothisguys

Okay this is fine we fine i just have to listen to the reactions going on underneath the constant screaming in my head this is f i n e I’M SO SORRY I’M TRYING MY BEST TO STAY POSITIVE HERE

Ahem

The monkey mountains are cute! Lil goofy, we love that for them. I’ll bet they set a day aside for making those. I do find it funny that monkey king’s stuff looks like he purchased it from a merch street vendor and Mk’s all looks handmade with scraps of old clothing items and string he stole from probably monkey king’s house;lKMGAWEF

Okay so capture the flag! Cool! Capture the flag with the staff thats so silly actuallyLG;KMAWEF

Oh he is sleep deprived

NAH THO I’VE FELT THAT BEFORE THE SLOW ONE EYE THAN THE OTHER BLINK THEN OUGHH AND MUFFLED STATIC AND THEN HEADSHAKE AND ALRIGHT BACK TO IT I HAVE LITERALLY DONE THATGL;KMAFWE who among us has not y’know—

The way Mk throws himself into training to avoid thinking about things is hilarious. I’m guessing he hasn’t had a wink of sleep in days NG;LKMAWEF

I already said the THING

Ough flying bark my beloved <3 I see u reused animation i missed you i’m gonna cry facedown on the floor now

Hm! Mk sounds different actually. Like the voice actor?? Something’s different about the voice, tho that could just be my audio honestlyG;LKAWEF Maybe a little deeper sounding? HMHM INCHRESTING

Wukong just yeeting the staff at Mk was funny HGL;KJSAFD

aHA GOT A HIT IN

Nah the way Wukong is just >:D is nice, we love mentor and student bonding hours

Okayokayokayokay l i s t e n. One kinda negative opinion here, I may bring it up later we’ll see; the expressions don’t match the voice acting energy. Like… the vibes are just different. S I G H S. End comment for now ;-;7

Okay, okay, I laughed. I did laugh. I confess, I laughed, “Here… comes… monkie—“

“KING”

I laughed. That was silly, i liked that, thank you bless <3 That made my day <3 Bless u sir <3 Silly goofy <3

It’s interesting to see Mk and Wukong getting closer in power level tho like, the dynamic is shifting to something else, vibin a little different, I dunno, could be the animation change, writer change, whatever it is the vibe is v different

Glad to see the humour is still there <3

Huh, Mk sounds really different to me IS IT JUST ME?? AM I GOING INSANE?? ??? ? NOBODY ELSE PICKING UP ON THAT??

.

honestly it could just be because bro is sleep deprived as HECK which honestly would make sense, JUDGEMENT RESERVED FOR LATER!! (could also be my headphones i ain’t even lying)

“yousaidnoholdingbackbutyouheldbackrightuntiltheendrightwheniwasabouttowin—“ BRO U ARE SO SLEEP DEPRVIEDLKGMA;OIEWFM GO TAKE A NAP

Wowza we do love the high-key confirmation monkey king’s holding back all the time tho that’s fun mwahahahahaha VINDICATION

Oooohhh nicely done wildbrain you kept the little spinny guys, y’know those in the background legs and arms out spinning versions of Mk? that’s nice I always loved those with flying bark

[face in hands] bro pls i can’t live with the flashbacks pls UR HURTING ME WHYYYYYYYYYY

Hi and welcome to knox’s live [sniffs] missing flying bark reaction, today we will [snimffles] C RY WAILS

Just two monkeys holding baaaaaaoh okay

sniffs

weird

so confim… share stone?? how does that work?? also fambly confirmed ig, RELATED. Cause if its literally the same stone… that’s a whole related bois right there. Appropriate concern for Mk fr

Kaykay h o ne s t l y ?? ? It doesn’t feel like monkie kid so far—granted we are oNLY three minutes in so I may take that back—but MAN throwing me off quite a bit WILD

Mk avoiding monkey still gotcha, its kinda neat how willing swk is to change the subject n stuff

I’M COMPARTMENTALIZINGNALSK;FMA;WOEIFMSFD

ME TOO MK

ME TOO

IF I STOP I DIE

SO REAL

ME RN

MK MANSPLAINING ABOUT MONKEYS TO THE LITERAL MONKEY KINGSDLFKMAOWEF

P sure that’s sharks bud

NOPE MONKEYS

HELPGNSADFKAMSDF

THE SPEED WITH WHICH

WUKONG IS DISTRACTED

“:OOOOO SURPRISE???? :D?? no wait—“

Mk bro is there really a surprise or are you trying to run away from the subject—

I’m sorry i made the exact same sound as monkey king when macaque showed up don’t look at me—SPEAKING OF MANSPLAINING, HERE WE GO, LEMME GUESS, GONNA LECTURE MONKEY KING ON HOW HE’S NOT DOING A GOOD JOB OR HE NEEDS TO DO THIS AND THAT AND IGNORES THE FACT MONKEY KING IS CLEARLY TRYING WITH WHATEVER IT IS HOW CLOSE AM I GUYS?

Also before i continue, listen I’m NNNOOOT sure how I feel about like… Mk and Wukong “our egg” I dunno feels kinda weird to me for some reason like, so they’re definitely related now, whether that be technically bros or straight up twins. Like i’m a huge fan of found family and now its like… WOW I FOUND AN ACTUAL RELATED FAMILY MEMBER THAT I ALREADY HAD AN ESTABLISHED DYNAMIC WITH AND NOW THAT CHANGES HOW WE INTERACT AHA this is fine, I wasn’t sure about Monkey Mk first either so I’ll probably get over it— G;LAKSDFM I like Sifu and Student better than I do big bro and little bro at this point tho :T might just be me

GOOD GODS WE’RE ONLY THREE MINUTES AND FORTY SECONDS IN SAVE ME

Wow, a lot of things getting confirmed this first ep actually wow. I’m kinda startled. I’m so used to like… biased narration and skirting around the what’s actually being said and everything being carried by the animation but in this first ep we have verbal confirmation that

both mk and monkey king hold back

mk and monkey king are related

Wukong and Macaque have lived on the mountain together since they were born

Oh cool working together huh interesting—AHA. AHA I TOLD YOU. SEE??? TRASH TALKING MONKEY KING AHA SEE? sniffs I’m sorry but

Macaque, after seeing Monkey King try to talk to Mk about stuff and Mk brushing him off so hard he flies off the mountain: you suck as a mentor

SHUT UR MOUTH MACAQUE I LIKED YOU BETTER IN YOUR THEATRE KID PHASE—

Okay no, seriously tho, whats up with all the tilted angles?? I’ve counted what…? Four? Five of them now?? Two in the theme song, at least two in this convo and then one other one I thought but I might’ve been imaging it. Are they trying to bring an off centre vibe?? if the goal is to make us uncomfortable it at the very least is working on me

ANOTHER ONE???

.

P

Pls tell me they don’t do this tilting screen thing throughout the whole season

Like, once in a while for dramatic effect is nice, this is the third time in this one convo alone—

Ough. Man godspeed Monkey King trying to give Mk 25 minutes of peace fr

Ig macaque do be having a point tho, there sure do be something else going on with the lad

OHHHH ANOTHER CONFIMRATION??? Wow ask and ye shall receive ig dang

Confirmation 4. Sun Wukong did not know Mk was a monkey

That’s wild that the eyes of truth couldn’t see through Mk’s disguise or whatever it is that’s some pretty powerful stuff then

Also HELPGMALSKFMASDF WHY IS MACAQUE BEING SO AGGRESSIVE I’M WHEEZINGL;KAMSFSD

“It just felt right” ah, I’m sure that won’t be said multiple times throughout this season I’m sure this won’t be a recurring theme, DESTINY, IS THAT YOU?

Every moment of this conversation is tilted and it is distracting me so much helpMLGAOEFMI LISTEN THERE WAS A PICTURE AT THIS LADY’S HOUSE I VISITED TODAY AND IT WAS CROOKED BUT A COULDNT’ FIX IT BECAUSE IT WAS BEHIND HER AND THE COUCH AND IT WOULD HAVE BEEN RUDE, THIS GIVES ME THE SAME TWITCHY FEELING JUST A LITTLE BIT BG;KLAMSEWF

Okay, tbf, macaque is definitely mmmm how’s you say this… looking at the bigger picture, a little bit more. Wukong’s priority is Mk and that’s p much it. Is mk okay. Is mk ready. Is mk safe. All that other stuff doesn’t matter to him. Which is silly cause that’s how Mk feels about Monkey King too. Is he here. Is he okay. Who cares about backstory. Which is!! Funky!!

“All your old companions are suddenly here” uhuhuh, so that is weird, and they definitely all did die.

Yeah Macaque how come you back huh—well its LBD obviously but y’know same thing, Macaque I think maybe you’re not saying why you’re actually thinking about all this you’re one of the people who were snatched back bro, bro? bro are you listening—

HELPGKLMASFOI;WMFSADF THE WAY WUKONG DOES NOT CARE ABOUT STRINGS BEING PULLED UNTIL MACAQUE MENTIONS MK.

Sniffs, wowza

“and they’re not finished.”

“Are you?”

HONESTLY FAIR, FAIR, I’M SORRY, I TOO, WOULD BE DONE WITH A GUY WHO KEEPS CALLING ME TERRIBLE AND TELLING ME ALL THE REASONS I’M STUPID, NO MATTER IF HE BRINGS UP ANY GOOD POINTS OR NOT, SERIOUSLY, FAIR MONKEY KING I’LL CHEER YOU ON, GET EM KING—

iNHALES

>:T

“you need to do better” = “if you’re homeless… JUST BUY A HOUSE”

same energy

sniffs LISTEN. Wukong has literally been running around trying to take everything on himself for the past four seasons and steps back when Mk needs to do things himself, literally no matter what this dude does he gets flack for it >:T AS A MONKEY KING FAN WHAT THE HECK—

He sure does look tired dude :(

AND THEN THEY’RE GONNA SLAP THE CIRCLET ON HIM, CAN HE GET A FIVE SECOND BREAK? PLS?? HE COULD USE IT

Mk you sound so incredibly sleep deprived TAKE A NAP

OUGH, seriously tho, I do love how dedicated mk and monkey king are to each other?? its fun

Excuse me sir

sir

sir excuse

me

sir

sir the stone

sir

why

is it cracking sir

…HA ngl a third monkey would be funny, heck LETS GET ALL THE SPIRITUAL PRIMATES IN HERE, POP EM OUTTA THERE OR SOMETHIN—

okie dokey whats the surprise—PIGSY

TAHT’S MY MAN

Honestly we should have seen Monkey Mk coming with how many times he ends up on Monkey king’s shoulders and vice versa

BRO UR THE ONE THAT CALLED HIM PLEASELK;MG;OAEWF

MEI BELOVED

GRAB HIM

AAAA

BAM

SORRY

great sound effects bravo

Mei ily so much

“AHAHA NOPE WE’RE DOING THIS NOW” i do love him so much with my whole heart ur honour

awww AWWW THEY FIXED HIS

H O U S E

WAILS

BRO TRIED TO MAKE

A HAIR CLONE HOUSE I’M CRYING;LASFMAWOEF

TANG IS CANONLY PRETENDING TO BE A 90YO WOMAN TO GET OUT OF MANUAL LABOUR

IF HE WAS ON THE TITANIC WHEN IT SANK, HE WOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST ONE INTO A DRESS AND ONTO A LIFEBOAT

Huh Pigsy also sounds different to me. Mk’s getting more familiar, Pigsy sounds DIFFERENT, it might be my headphones yeahNGKLAWMEF I FEEL LIKE I’M LOSING MY MIND A LITTLE. MEI SOUNDS NORMAL, MY BOIS MK AND PIGSY SOUND OFFOHHHHH OH MY GOODNESS MK’S DOODLES ON THE WALLS EVERYBODY SHUT UP

Return of Buff Mk and two massive smiles we love to see it

ohh AWWW looks like they put some pictures up too awww oh OH LOTS OF PICTURES oh ough… tribute to flying bark real huh

i’m totally fine

these are cute!! mk’s doodles everywhere makes me happy fr tho ough <3

me when a picture of monkey king and his monkeys crawling on him: mwehehehehe

its silly and i love them

KING MOVE MEI

ABSOLUTE QUEEN BEHAVIOUR

PUTTING HER PICTURE WITH MONKEY KING RIGHT ON TOP OF THE TV SO HE HAS TO LOOK AT IT WHENEVER HE SITS DOWN

SHE HAS ADOPTED HIM

ITS HAPPENED FOLKS

HE’S OFFICALLY IN

HE’S UNDER THE MEI FRIENDSHIP UMBRELLA AND WILL NEVER ESCAPE

THEY ARE MK PROTECTION SQUAD BACK OFF

AU WHERE MEI BIG SISTER

THAT IS ALL GOODNIGHT

cH OK I N G

GOING RIGHT FOR THE HUG

WAILS

honestly

really nice of them to do the pictures that was super thoughtful like ough that’s super sweet

PLEEEEAAASEEE PIGSY WITH MK’S THEME SONG AS HIS ALARM, THAT’S SO MUCH FUN I LOVE THAT GAG KEEP IT COMING

Man, it’s tough to be a monkey hated by all who wants to do his best and protect his student/family member but you don’t know how to do that and everyone keeps yelling at you—

Pigsy ily

fr tho a lot of the cast sound off hope they’re all doing okay :(

Pigsy: if you wanna stay, you can stay—

Mk: NOPELETSGOLETSGOLETSGO-

SANDY PLEASE STOP BABYING TANG HE’S LITERALLY FINE—

MK IS NONSTOP RN AND I FEEL THAT

Ah pigsy’s noodles <3

Secret family recipe that technically isn’t secret because Cheng’e aired an ep of Pigsy sharing it on television but okay— /j/j/j GJKA;SDMKFL

…you guys don’t understand. Y’know the next meme i was gonna try to draw? “truth or dare.” and it fits. so well with ep one i’ma draw it right after this actually i WAS ALREADY GONNE DRAW IT I SHOULD HAVE DONE IT IMMEDEATLYG;LKASMFASD

…why did noodles catapult out of her mouth whats happening— ;LKGMAWEF

sleeping with the noodles, nice one nice one

Dad stare. THE DAD STARE

That is what we call PTSD—GMLA,FAWPEF

huh, something different with the dialogue that i’m not used to. Not sure what it is, the rhythm of it feels different, OR I COULD BE LOSING MY MIND DON’T PAY ME ANY ATTENTION FOLKS

I do love Pigsy bonding with his son thank you very much

“…but what?” good job Pigsy he’s teaching his son he’s being silly i do love him still

AHA, i see i see “gotta feel it” “it felt right” we all about the vibes now ig

wow yeah the dialogue is very very different, did we change writing teams? i was so distracted by the animation change i wasn’t paying attention to all that, but the dialogue just… not quite pigsy y’know? i like seeing him soft but i also like him gruff and awkward too? he’s vibin more like how i wrote him in my crackfic for crack purposes. kinda weird

its home, aw that’s sweet

don’t pass out mk

OH BABY MK

SOBS

BABY MK IN THE RECIPE BOOK SHADDUUUUPPPPP WAILS

.

He’s gonna turn around and mk’s gonna be passed out isn’t he

that is a little silly

hm

I do miss gruff pigsy a lot actually grumpy with a heart of gold is the best pigsy

“still works”

;-; c o o l

PIGSY CARRYING MK UPSTAIRSLKGMA;OISEF;ALKMEFSD

HEY

HEY HOW’D YOU GET THE SCRIPT OF MY SICFIC

HEY

HEY HANG ON I HAVNE’T WRITTEN IT YET WAIT FOR ME—

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

scratches head

y’all can come at me with pitchforks and torches but

this doesn’t feel like Pigsy to me

I dunno if its the dialogue or the pacing or something but its just… v off. For some reason. feels like a different character and not in the “he had an arch” way. …I dunno, ITS THROWING ME OFF FOLKS He feels like a fan fiction pigsy DONT’S STAB ME—

Son in the fourth season hit way harder— I’MSORRYI’MSORRYDON’TKILLME—

awww monkey king origami real

he’s fine as i can see

oop

okay so what’s going on in the dream realm cause they’re all not sleeping good so its probably a shared dream of some ki— AHAHA HANG ON HANG ON

Hang on

if they get

dragged to the underworld

that would be funny

monkey king passed out (technically drunk himself to death but lets say passed out) he woke up to being dragged to the underworld so it would be funny—

Whats he saying??? ECHOY VOICE I CAN’T UNDERSTAND YOU

I understood time to wake up but not the other bit

AHAHAHAH CALLED IT

SUMMONED

SNATCHED

MONKEYS??

OH YEAH ALL OF THEM OKAY

face in hands

its o v e r

THAT FELT LIKE THE LONGEST EPISODE I’VE EVER WATCHED IN MY LIFE

OH GODS ITS SEVEN O’CLOCK I’VE BEEN HERE FOR TWO HOURS AND TWENTY MINUTES I

HELPGKLASMF;OAIWEMFLSADF

Okay, overall consensus of episode 1: you can feel the change in studios and you can feel the change in writers (if there’s new writers, if not i can eat my words.) the animation is about what i expected, they use a lot of tilted angles for reasons I don’t know it’s making me kinda dizzy, some of the VA’s sound very off, I hope they’re doing okay, the dialogue was weirdly hard to focus on, i had to go back and replay bits several times to understand what they were saying, humour still nice, outfits cute, Tang needs to get pushed into some hard manual labour, the house bit was really nice i love that monkey king has been accepted by the group, macaque questioning why the jttw crew is there means that their reincarnations are a weird thing which i’m staring at, uh… and they’re in the underworld now probably!! WOO!! HORRIFYING!!!

Y’know my goal was to watch 2 episodes but I think that’s all i have in me for today so SEE YOU NEXT TIME ON KNOX REACTS UNLESS IS SCARED YOU ALL OFF WITH STARING TOO HARD AT THE DIFFERENCES, JOIN US FOR WHEN KNOX INEVITABLY SHATTERS INTO PEICES AND STARTS YELLING ABOUT HOW MUCH THEY HATE LARGE CORPORATIONS LIKE LEGO AND DISNEY AND HOW MUCH THEY LOVE CREATORS LIKE FLYING BARK AND THE VA’S PEACE OUT AND PLS DON’T COME AT ME WITH PITCHFORKS AND TORCHES—

edit: EATING MY WORDS, sound mixing studios changed, not writers, that would explain some of the difficulty i was having hearing the audio and why a lot of the voices sounded off pls disregard all previous ranting about those things o7

edit 2: i've processed a bit, we got dadsy, i will live forever

[welikeimagines-andfandoms]

100 Random Prompts

1. “I fucking hate you, but I don’t hate fucking you”

2. "I get so hard when I'm around you. I've tried fucking other people and pumping my cock every night and yet my body craves you."

3. “How did you manage to hurt your hand this badly?” “Well I’ve never punched someone before, I didn’t realise how hard peoples faces are.”

4. “I love you and I hate you all at the same time.”

5. “Yeah, sometimes I get sad, but then I look into your beautiful eyes and it’s all better.”

6. “You like when I call you ‘princess’? Will you be my good little princess?”

7. “If you do this, I’ll show you my boobs”

8. “Has the fire revealed any secrets in the 15 straight minutes you’ve been staring at it?”

9. “Please don’t leave.”

10. “I’m here, it’s okay, no one will ever hurt you like that ever again”

11. “Guess we’re the only two idiots in the whole city stupid enough to go to a museum in the middle of a thunderstorm”

12. “You deserve to be looked after.”

13. “Give me a kiss, and everything will be alright.”

14. “I just want to die”

15. “We’ve got to hide!”

16. “Scream my name so everyone knows who fucks you this good”

17. "I'm sorry." "You have nothing to apologise for, darling.”

18. “Bend over, slut”

19. “Ned i postog a nin, ni bant” (When you lie beside me, I am complete)

20. *gets insulted* “aawww thank you.”

21. “Le i velethril nîn” (You are my love)

22. “A warrior out there, but in here, in this bedroom, you’re nothing but a little weak whore.”

23. “I just feel so drained.”

24. “What happened to you to make you so wise?”

25. “If I’m being mean to someone, I’m probably flirting.” “Is that why you’re always mean to (character)?”

26. “Thiol vae” (You look good)

27. “I just did it to make you jealous.”

28. “Stay nice and still for me, baby, just like that. Let me take care of you.”

29. “You know you sure do have a lot of teeth for someone so stupid.”

30. “They do realise I can understand what they’re saying, right?”

31. “Would you like to dance with me?” “only if you don’t get upset if I accidentally step on your foot”

32. “Fuck, I need you so bad!”

33. “I think it’s best I leave”

34. “I’ll never forget you.”

35. “How clever of an insult, and how quickly you thought of it. Very surprising for someone so dim witted.”

36. “I’m not afraid. Please touch me.”

37. “Of course you can stay.”

38. “I wish you well.”

39. “Come down here so I can kiss you!”

40. “Fuck, turn around for me, princess.”

41. “No gûn annin” (Bend over for me)

42. “You look so lovely on your knees, sweet boy.”

43. “You’re so pretty”

44. “What’s that?” “Trinket, I like trinkets”

45. “You deserve nice things”

46. “Our sweet girls pussy is so tight!"

47. “Take your shirt off!” “Why?!” “Distract them from the pain!”

48. “Darling I’m (hundreds/thousands) of years old, that isn’t vintage/old to me.”

49. “I’m doing this because I want to and not because you told me to”

50. “You belong here, in my arms, forever.”

51. “You lied to me”

52. “Borrow my jacket, keep it nice and warm for me”

53. “You look so divine when you dance.”

54. “You look lovely, Y/N.” “Please don’t lie or pity me so.”

55. “Le vaethor veleg” (You are a mighty warrior)

56. “Ni am gin anin lû hen?” (Can I be on top this time?)

57. “Stop fucking swearing”

58. “aran vuin” (Beloved king)

59. “I hope you don’t mind.”

60. "Those for me, sweet girl?" "Oh! It was gonna be a surprise but yes, yes they are."

61. “I love when you wear a skirt/dress, it’s so much easier to fuck you like this.”

62. “Life doesn’t feel so bad when I’m with you.”

63. “You don’t know a thing about me!”

64. “I failed them! They died and I failed them! It’s all my fault!”

65. “You’re such a little thing, and we can have you anyway we please.”

66. “Trust me, Y/N! (Character) likes you!” “Don’t lie to me!”

67. “Baby, tits arent supposed to be perky and perfect. They’re supposed to be soft and natural and beautiful like yours”

68. “I’m not your servant, I’m not your slave, but you could be mine if you like.”

69. “I know we don’t know each other very well but I’m really sick and I need you to pick me up from work, please.”

70. “It’s alright, my love, don’t be afraid, we’ll make it out together.”

71. “No, stay. You’re warm and soft”

72. “Trust me, I adore you.”

73. “Avo dharo!” (Don't stop!)

74. “You know I could kill you if I wanted to.” “Do it then, I really don’t care.”

75. “I might be little but I can still kick your ass”

76. “I just don’t know if I can do this anymore”

77. “Of course I will serve you, my prince/princess/king/queen/lord/lady.”

78. “You wouldn’t know anything about this (character), but it’s exhausting being this gorgeous, and I need a lot of sleep.”

79. “Its real cold tonight. You wanna come over and keep me nice and warm?”

80. “That sounded dirtier than I intended”

81. “You don’t have to be alright, you know”

82. “How can I love myself, when I’m so draining to everyone?”

83. “Please! I’ve been such a good boy/girl!”

84. “You just want to be used so fucking badly don’t you, sweet thing?”

85. “Please! I was a fool and I can not apologise enough! Please y/n…. Please….”

86. “Do you need a hug?”

87. “Come on, princess, hop on my back”

88. “What you makin’?” “Chocolate cake. You wanna help?”

89. “Don’t leave. Please?”

90. “Why do you always annoy me so much?” “Coz you’re sexy when you’re angry.”

91. “That’s better, isn’t it? You just needed to be filled with my cock”

92. “That’s the cutest sneeze I’ve ever heard.”

93. “Istog an challas perian maer” (You do know what hobbits are the right height for)

94. “Oh fuck, sweetheart”

95. “I’ll punch you in your stupid face!”

96. “Tonight I will be the powerful warrior, and you will be the tiny mortal beneath me. You will worship and praise me like the goddess I am.”

97. “Aaaaww! Aren’t you sweet!”

98. “Hey” “*flirting* Oh, heeeyy” “No! Absolutely not!”

99. “You don’t scare me.” “Yeh, but I bet I turn you on.”

100. “Are you going by to be good for me?” “Ye-yes.” “Good girl. If you do behave I’ll give you a reward.”

[greymoonfeelings]

Meant To Be

Whumpuary #3: “stay with me”

summary: Greys Anatomy 8x24 but make it Top Gun: Maverick

warnings: main character death, major injury, blood mention

word count: 800 words

notes: the plane ep of greys ruined my life and several of @a-reader-and-a-writer ‘s fics have re-inflicted that pain so this is for her.

•••

Rooster wanders through the woods in search of his WSO. The ground is littered with leaves that had fallen off the now bare trees. The crunch of his boots against the dried-out leaves and the sound of him screaming your name fill the air.

Between each hoarse cry, he waits a few seconds to see if you respond, but it never comes. Despite the fact that his throat is only getting drier, he refuses to even fathom the possibility that you will never answer and so he continues.

This time when he comes to a stop he hears a clinking noise. Rooster stumbles towards where the sound is coming from and sees an arm knocking against the metal of the plane.

“Oh my god!” He limps towards you as fast as he possibly can, accessing your situation as he gets closer.

You’re pinned under a large chunk of the Super Hornet. Rooster falls to his knees beside you, pushing up the visor of your helmet so he can take inventory of the small cuts littering your face. His brown eyes are filled with concern, but you still find comfort in them.

“I knew you’d find me,” you stutter.

“How are you doing under there?”

“I’ve been better.” You crack a smile but the presence of blood on your teeth further worries Rooster.

“I’m gonna get you out of here.”

Rooster stands up, ignoring the pain shooting through his leg. He uses all the strength he can muster to try and lift the hunk of metal. He manages to move it some, but not enough to free you.

“Fuck! I can’t do it,” he cries and falls to a heap on the ground.

“Are you hurt?” You ask and Rooster replies with a sad chuckle. Of course, you were still concerned about him even when facing death.

“My leg’s a little busted up and I have a head laceration but don’t worry about me. I need to focus on getting you out of there.”

“Don’t waste your energy. I’m not going to make it.”

“Don’t say that.”

“It’s true. My legs are crushed. I can’t feel my arm, it might not even be there anymore and my chest feels like it’s going to explode.”

“You’re not dead yet and I don’t plan on giving up until we get out of here.”

“Roos, I’m dying.”

“No, you’re not.”

“I am. Please… tell my family that I love them.”

“You are not dying.“

“Will you hold my hand?”

“No, I’m not holding your hand because you’re not dying.”

“Please,” a tear slips from the corner of your eye, “hold my hand.”

“No. You’re not dying today. Do you hear me?”

Rooster stands once again and tries to move the part of his plane that’s trapping you. After another unsuccessful attempt, he resigns to the fact that there is no way he will be moving it alone.

He lays down on his stomach beside you and takes your hand in his much larger one. Now that Rooster’s face is closer to yours he can hear you wheezing. Each breath you take is uneven and seems to be causing you pain.

“I love you,” he admits.

“Don’t say it just because I did and now I might die and you feel guilty.”

You’re referring to your last night spent at the Hard Deck before you shipped out for this mission. You confessed that you still loved Rooster even after being broken up for several years. You were afraid that something exactly like the situation you were in now might happen and you didn’t want to die with any regrets.

“No. I do. I do.” Rooster reassures you. “I love you. I’ve always been in love with you and I always will be.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. Which is why you have to stay alive because when we get home we’re gonna get married and after that, we’ll have a few kids.”

“A few?”

“At least two or three.”

“Think we’ll have any girls?”

“Two girls, a boy, and a dog. The girls will be the oldest and they’ll tease their little brother but protect him. When they’re little we’ll make them wear matching outfits and take those cheesy family photoshoots.”

“That sounds nice.”

“We’re gonna be happy. You and I, we’re gonna have a great life, so stay with me. You can’t die because we’re supposed to be together. We’re meant to be.”

“Meant to be.” You smile as your last breath passes through your lips.

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” Rooster chants as tears cascade down his face.

He can barely see through the blur of tears as he reaches one hand to your face, gently closing your eyes. His other still clutches your cold limp one, refusing to let go until help arrives.

[absolute-lithops-effecting]

When will wood said "they say grow up be a mam cause until then you're nothing but a short haired girl"

When will wood said "i was nothing before, so i couldn't have asked to be born"

When will wood said "never learned how I should feel, instincts somehow stunted, just seem haunted by my stupid urge to protect"

When will wood said "dandelion seeds yet to ride on the breeze, you make a wish upon the dead but turn and call it a weed. Only plastic never die"

When will wood said "you fill your head with thoughts you find you can't even feel. Try to make room in your skull but it's full of them. All of the things that you think and think about thinking. I know it's hard, but they’re not who you are. They're white noise"

When will wood said "and a little conformity never hurt nobody, but lately I’ve been worried that you’re losing yourself. So how many milligrams of you are still left in there?"

When will wood said "baby could you play along with me? Baby would that be alright with you? And when we find out what's wrong with me, could you tell me jow could you tell me how and if i'm still pretty?"

When will wood said "it's lonely out here socrates"

When will wood said "but i'll tell you what i'm not afraid to die, i'm more afraid of what might happen first. Either way it's not like we'll get out alive. I can't say that i know which one is wrose"

When will wood said "everybody knows that, nobody knows that, everybody's in on my motherfucking business"

When will wood said "so come on, William, grow up, be a man, ‘cause until then they’re gonna treat you like you’re just a little girl"

When will wood said "everything's useless especially songs, it think the truth is that everyone's wrong. Still sing along, still sing a long long time. I might keep looking for nothing to find, they say "keep tracking it's all in your mind, jimmy you're fine," end of the line, gaining speed, wrapping trees"

When will wood said "oh are you at all like me? Do you know what i mean, or am i too close to see? Someone, anyone!"

When will wood said "why to thine own self be true when it is you who are the problem, not the things you do but something deep inside."

When will wood said "I might be a saint worth steeple, i might be the brain of evil. Bad things happen to good people, good things happen to me."

When will wood said "Although my eyes face forward, climb up on my shoulder. sure you'll see my point of view, I'd bring you with me to the office in my pocket, but the world would put us down. Lock me up and toss the key. You might seem behind bars but friend this cage is inside out.."

When will wood said "Is there cheese in the great beyond? Rinds of parmesan, wine to water, night from dawn. Life gets shorter, teeth grow long. Mind me not and I’ll mind my own and my mind’s not one bite smaller or lesser than yours. Do I belong in right and wrong? Nature, I guess."

When will wood said "Thursday traction, Tuesday titration. My hope is to assess through my objective report of your subjective conjecture whether this proprietary blend of expertise and seasoning works as well as this transorbital ice pick. Holistic ballistics, you got a better idea? It’s about the best we could come up with. What, you think ideas spread because they’re good? No, they spread because people like them. So here we are once again. Holding, as it were, a mirror up to your mirror. I guess it’s just something people do."

When will wood said "Ain’t your you-dentity at stake? Does aspirin kill you with the pain?You’re not your thoughts, you’re not your brain, you’re just the character you’ve made. Up in your head, down in your heart, what seem like separate body parts come together to believe they’re you, and not just chemistry"

When will wood said-

[lilphve]

why can’t I be normal or happy? its so unfair every one is happy and has friends and is accepted its not fair why am I never happy why am I always nervous why am I always stressed why am I queer or genderqueer why can’t I be out to some people why do I have to hide myself why do I have to constantly try to convince myself that I’m okay and happy cause I’m not I’m not happy and it’s not fair I want irl friends I want to be liked I wanna have fun I wanna enjoy life so why can’t I its not fair some of the worst people have friends and support and are happy so why not me why do I have to spend every day prepared to be killed or hurt or insulted for my sexuality or gender why do I have to live in fear I’ll bump into a certain person why do I have to live in fear that everyone hates me why do I its not fucking fair I want friends I want love I want everything everyone has cause its not fair hell even pedophiles have friends but not me bullies have friends terrible people have friends but not me how is that fair and I can’t even mention it to someone cause they always say “You want friends too much you won’t get them” or “maybe that’s what god wants” its not fair why do I have to live in fear that I’m sinning and gonna burn in hell when it doesn’t even relate with my beliefs why do I always feel the need to correct someone and let them know I’m not a boy knowing how happy it makes me feel why do I always have to be so sexual why must I depend on others to make me feel even slightly happy why do I go through my exes texts hoping to feel better why am I losing friends why do I not care for any one except for like 5 people why am I so quiet why am I so loud why do I talk so much why do I not talk enough why do I always want more why am I always so ungrateful to a point even my mom tells me it to my face with all honesty why am I so useless why am I so hurtful and mean and hate filled why am I never satisfied why am I always angry why am I so curious why did I let him do that to me and not tell anyone why do I have to be so different I just wanna be normal I wanna be feminine and blonde and have blue eyes and long straight hair and friends and be Christian or catholic and be loved by everyone and be straight and cis and normal and happy why can’t I have that why do I have to be the way I am why do I wanna kill myself all the time why am I too afraid to even kill myself why am I always overthinking why am I always over analyzing why is my safe place my phone why do I cry when I don’t have my headphones why am I so sensitive to sound am I faking it am I just a pick me whose faking being sensitive just because does everyone hate me why do my friends care more for my bullies than me why does no one understand how I feel and whenever someone does they’re older than me and from another state its not fair I NEED friends even my therapist said so why won’t my mom take me to that place for other LGBTQIAP+ kids when that might be exactly what I need why am I so scared to kill myself why am I so scared to live why am I so scared to love why do I not know what love is why can’t I be happy why can’t I be sad why can’t I be nervous why can’t a feel why can I feel so much why am I always alone why do I always feel alone why do I always feel this weird dark gaping empty hole inside me why can’t I be happy I have a few friends who might genuinely care for me why do I ignore their feelings why can’t I feel their feelings why do bullies hate me so much they’re gay too they’re black too they’re single too they have trauma too we have the same humor why do they hate me was it something I said something I did did I breathe to loud too quiet do I need to think slower to I need to be more closer minded why do I upset those around me why don’t I love myself why can’t I go to my mom without her not listening to me why won’t she listen to me why does she try to blame everything on god rather than realizing there’s ways she could help why is she all of the sudden worried about me going somewhere on a Sundays night because “its a school night” knowi she makes

[undertheopensky]

Wildlife 3

Whumptober Day 10: Stranded

Characters: Hyrule, Blue, Red, everyone’s there but may or may not have a major speaking part

Trigger warnings: Alternative Backstories, Past Violence to a Child, Broken Bones

Read on Ao3!

Late to the party? Read Part 1 and Part 2!

-----

Wild’s strange, glowing explosives knock another foot of strange, white stone out of the wall. From a safe distance, with their hands over their ears, seven Hylians watch as he inspects his handiwork, though anyone can see he’s not pleased with his progress.

“Am I going deaf, or are his explosions getting smaller?” asks Twilight.

“I think he’s just getting better at placing them so the explosion goes towards the wall instead of us,” says Warriors.

Their initial meeting – a mess of screaming, shouting, and angrily pointed fingers – had steadily developed into reluctant truce as they decided, one by one, that it didn’t matter if anyone else was telling the truth about being a hero; they wanted out. And they had the best chance of it by pooling their resources. If not their names. That had nearly been another argument, because what were the chances they would all be called Link, but they’d eventually agreed to nicknames for efficiency’s sake. After all, standing around fighting about it wasn’t getting them any closer to freedom.

Another explosion heralds a now-distinctive crumbling of stone, as Wild’s demolition project makes it through to the other side of yet another wall.

“Where is he getting all those bombs from?” Sky wonders. He’s their most recent acquisition, two walls back, and still a little confused.

“That flat piece of stone he carries is enchanted,” grumpy Legend answers. “I dunno if it just stores them or produces them, but either way, he’s not afraid of running out.”

Hyrule’s just glad they’re powerful enough to break through the walls, which they’ve discovered are thicker across than a man is tall. He’d spent a lot of time carefully thumping away with the pommel of his blade, looking for weak points, and finding none.

They file through the new tunnel and are disappointed but not surprised to find more of the same: evergreen trees, wild greens, and an assortment of rocks, arranged in slightly different ways. They have yet to find that they’ve doubled back at all, so surely they’ll come across the edge of this strange place and escape eventually.

Surely.

Hyrule can’t help hoping that another portal will turn up and derail the endless walking. There haven’t even been any monsters, for Din’s sake. It’s very disconcerting.

Though that might be about to change - there’s movement and colour not far ahead of them.

It’s not a monster. It’s a little kid – no older than ten. He’s skinny and dirty and barefoot, sitting at the base of a tree digging amongst its roots with intent focus. The clothes hanging off his frame are as tattered and dirty as he is.

How long has he been out here? Is he – alone? The way they had been before Wild and his infinite bomb supply had started cutting tunnels through the strange white walls?

He makes a little noise of triumph. A handful of small, bitter tubers are added to the pile at his knee, and then he goes back to digging.

Sky makes a hurt, worried noise.

He jolts at the sound, head jerking to face it, and as soon as he spots them he’s scrambling to his feet.

There’s a visible flash of alarm as he takes in their weapons and armour, before it vanishes under a grim mask. The stick he’d snatched up is no match for properly forged steel and he knows it.

“Easy,” Time calls, calm and low and steady. “We’re not gonna hurt you. It’s okay.”

The kid visibly does not believe him.

From this angle it’s easy to see that a good portion of the dirt on his face isn’t dirt at all – there’s a huge bruise over his eye and cheek and forehead. Maybe the boy had stumbled or fallen, but the way he tracks Time’s hands as the man talks makes Hyrule suspect a more deliberate cause. It’s still black and blue and aching purple in some places. It makes his fingers twitch with the need to fix it.

And, hell, why not?

“That bruise looks like it hurts,” he calls, making the boy startle and take his glare off Time. “I’m a healer; if you want, I have a healing spell to help it feel better.”

Now he has the boy’s attention. “How good?” he asks abruptly.

Hyrule slowly edges forward. “I can make it so it doesn’t hurt anymore.”

“No, I mean – how good a healer are you? Is it just bruises, or can you fix – worse stuff?”

Hyrule’s eyes widen. “Are you hurt? Where is it, how bad – I’m very good, I can help with most things, I just need to touch you I promise it won’t hurt –”

The boy flinches back. “No! Don’t –”

Hyrule freezes.

The boy wrestles with his instinctive reaction. Hyrule waits, patient, not moving from where he still has one hand extended. Finally the boy takes a deep breath, and stops pressing himself back into the tree. Passing a wary eye over the rest of the group – carefully holding themselves at a distance, letting Hyrule handle things – he says, low and quiet, “S’not for me.”

Someone else. There’s someone else in these woods the kid is protecting, someone who’s hurt bad, and goddesses no wonder he’s so guarded.

“Okay,” says Hyrule, matching his volume. “What would you like to do?”

That gets a wary, confused look. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I need to be touching them to heal them. Do you want to go get them and bring them here, or we can all follow you –” the kid tenses – “or I can go with you alone, and we’ll leave these guys here.”

The boy scratches at his arms, agitated. He clearly doesn’t like any of these options. He just as clearly knows he has to take one of them if he wants his friend healed and is mentally trying to find the least frightening option.

“Just you,” he says at last. “An’ if any of them follow us, I’ll make ‘em regret it.”

He means it, too. He’s only got a stick but there’s a wild light in his eyes that says he’ll make it hurt.

Hyrule nods agreeably. “Lead the way, then. We’ll be back,” he says to the others, “you guys wait here.”

Plus one, he signs, when the boy has turned away, and Wars winces in understanding.

He follows the boy through the trees, and at first he’s confused when they start curving in a great arc. Was the kid getting disoriented? Then at a rock he changes direction entirely, going in a long zigzag until he gets to a particularly large tree and curves back around almost the way they came -

Of course, Hyrule realises, with a stab of sorrow. The boy doesn’t trust them, any of them, and leading them straight to his injured friend? He can barely bring himself to let Hyrule come along.

They come to a stream. The kid sloshes right through without pausing. Heck, why would he? He’s got no shoes or socks to worry about, and the ragged hem of his trousers is too high to be menaced by the knee-high water. Hyrule, however, hates wet shoes, and has to take a flying leap that nearly ends with him falling backwards into the stream.

For a second, the kid looks as if he’ll laugh. Then the worried, too-serious expression comes back down, and he just keeps going. This time though he’s chewing the inside of his cheek and side-eyeing Hyrule, searching him for something. Hyrule has no idea what he’s looking for, and can only hope he passes muster.

Finally, he comes to some kind of conclusion, and opens his mouth.

Chiii-ruu-click-click! Chiii-click-chiii-click!

Chitter-chitter-click! Chitter-click-click! comes back to them like an echo, and the boy visibly relaxes, before remembering Hyrule is there and tensing again.

Hyrule wishes he could tell him he’s only going to help. Then he remembers he can.

“Hey,” he says, making the kid jump, “you’re in control here. I’m not going to do anything unless you tell me it’s okay.”

The kid stares at him, wordless doubt writ large on his bruised and swollen face.

Hyrule’s heart hurts.

They come to a thicket of gnarled shrubs, and instead of going around, the kid ducks down and scrambles right through.

There’s a tunnel of sorts, Hyrule realises when he peers more closely, too small for a full-grown adult to get through without tearing themselves to shreds on the thorns. Hyrule is no ten year old, but he’s also no stranger to narrow and ill-advised pathways. He scrambles after him.

In the middle of the thicket is a clear area, where he finds his guide already chittering away to a mirror image of himself. He has a moment of disorientation, of terror and desperate get the child away from the monster impulse, before the copy chitters back in the same language, bright and happy. It’s not a dark copy. It’s a person.

Twins, Hyrule realises, with something like shock.

Hyrule - needs a minute.

The thicket. They’ve clearly done work to make it - habitable, sort of. Thorns have been broken off from the branches making up the walls. The hollow that’s probably spacious enough for two preteen boys is rather cramped with Hyrule there, and trying very hard both not to look at them clicking back and forth at each other and not make it obvious. The ground is padded in a layer of pine needles so thick it almost squishes under his hand. Comfortable enough for an injured person to lay on for long periods. Hyrule isn’t close enough to see for sure, but the boy’s left leg has had the pant leg torn away to make way for the sticks tied there, and looks bloody and bruised.

He’s hurt.

Somehow, that’s what helps the most. Reminds Hyrule that he’s here because a child needs help.

The boys finish their conversation in that inexplicable language, and the injured one briefly presses the side of his head to his brother’s. Then he looks at Hyrule expectantly.

“Hi,” says Hyrule. “I don’t know what your brother’s told you, but I’m a healer, and I’d like to fix your leg, if it’s okay with you.” He points. “May I take a look?”

“Yes please,” says the new boy with none of his brother’s hesitation.

Hyrule takes his time looking over the injury, probing it with his magic without trying to instigate anything. His breath hisses through his teeth.

It’s bad. The children splinted it, with remarkable skill, but it doesn’t change how terrible the break is. It’s swollen – of course it’s swollen – with an ominous bulge halfway down the shin where the bone is displaced. To make matters worse, the injury’s older than he’d thought. Fine strands of new bone are already starting to form, bridging the broken pieces and trying to stabilise them.

Hyrule grimaces. The injury itself must be agony - no wonder the boy is hidden in a thicket of thorns, safe from outside interference. And he can help. Bonesetting, even fixing a bad heal, is within his capabilities - but it always hurts.

“Okay, I can fix this, but the bone has already started to heal -” both children are already wincing - “so it’s going to hurt, yeah,” he finishes.

The kid makes a face and reaches into the walls of thorns at his back. At first Hyrule’s not sure what he’s doing, then the kid pulls out a thick stick and starts working it between his teeth, clearly intending to bite down on it to keep from biting through his tongue, or worse.

Hyrule winces at the thought of splinters in small mouths and starts unlacing his right bracer. “Hold on, hold on, use this - leather’s better.”

The kid turns it over in his hands, clearly fascinated by the stitchwork, before remembering what it’s for and shoving it it in his mouth.

“Okay, ready? One. Two -”

Hyrule’s hands limn with green.

Blood vessels meeting, dead blood clearing, inflammation easing, strands of wrong bone dissolving under the strength of his magic so the bone can snap back into place -

The boy wails through the leather.

His brother goes so tense he’s nearly vibrating. His lips pull back from his teeth in a terrified snarl.

Despite the wild eyes and the tooth-baring snarl, he doesn’t lunge for Hyrule’s throat. Which is fantastic because he does need to concentrate. Bone is more complicated than it looks, layers that are structured differently and then wound through with blood vessels that did not appreciate sudden relocations, tender marrow bleeding needs to stop, and healing and healing and healing until there’s nothing left to heal.

“Ooooh, that always itches!” the boy wails, scratching frantically at the tops of both thighs where Hyrule’s magic had encouraged skin to grow over exposed and oozing muscle. “But I think it - Blue, help me get this off, I think it’s good!”

When the splints are off he immediately bounces to his feet to test it and gets his hair caught in the branches overhead, making him squeak in surprise. His brother rolls his eyes and gets up to help get him free. Hyrule just tries not to laugh.

“It doesn’t hurt, that’s amazing, it even fixed my knees, look, Blue, they’re not even scarred, I was sure it was gonna be awful! It doesn’t hurt anymore!”

His brother, still silent, looks at Hyrule with eyes filled with gratitude.

You healed them.

You saved them.

You helped, even though you didn’t have to.

He’s seen it before, many times. And it’s still just as overwhelming as the first time.

He manages a smile through the ache in his heart. “It’s what I do,” he says. “I’m supposed to be a hero, after all.”

The boy’s eyes light up. “You’re a hero? Really? That’s so cool! Where are you from?”

“Ah, Calatia. It’s to the northwest of Hyrule.”

“Wow, I’ve never been there, what’s it like? Wait, shoot, I never got your name! Blue, why didn’t you tell me his name! Wait I never gave you my name ohmygosh! Hi, I’m Red, thank you for fixing my leg, now what’s Calatia like??”

He has so much energy, it’s nearly dizzying. He peppers Hyrule with questions about his homeland while his brother - Blue - silently gets his curls free of the thorns. Then Hyrule mentions something about one of the others and he gets even more excited.

“There’s more of you?” He sounds fascinated. “How did you find each other - no, wait, how did you find us? Blue said this place was totally walled in!”

“Wild is something of a demolitions expert, so we’ve been blowing holes in all the walls.”

Red gasps again. “You can get out??”

“Well we’ve sure been trying…”

“Blue! Why didn’t you tell me!”

“Didn’t know,” Blue grunts. “Thought they’d come in like you and the other guy. Teleport, or whatever.”

“But there’s people! C’mon, c’mon! I wanna meet ‘em!”

Red has trouble making it through the tunnel of thorns. His leg, though healed, is stiff from long inactivity, and he struggles to keep his balance. Instead of being frustrated or upset, he just giggles to himself as he crouch-crawls through, and bounces up like he’s made of springs once he’s clear.

“Okay, let’s go!”

When they cross the stream again Blue stops right in the middle.

Red turns back, frowning. “Blue? What’s wrong?”

For a long minute Blue says nothing, just watches the clear water rushing past his feet. Then in one quick movement he leans down, scoops up a fish, and dumps it, still wriggling, at Hyrule’s feet.

He meets Hyrule’s eyes fearlessly. “For healing my brother.”

Hyrule’s shoulders go up to his ears. “I don’t - I’m not - I don’t need payment, I don’t take - you take it, you need the food, I don’t need to be paid for healing -”

“Not payment,” he insists. “A kindness for a kindness.”

“Oh, oh!” Red bounces excitedly on his toes. “If I catch you a fish too, will you heal Blue’s face??”

“You don’t have to, I’ll do that for free,” Hyrule tells him, “I’d’ve healed you for free, and I did. I’m a healer. Seeing people in pain means I haven’t done my job yet.”

Blue nudges the fish towards him. Hyrule sighs. “If I take the fish, will you let me heal you?” Blue gives him a blank, stubborn look.

“Blue, let him heal your face,” Red orders, and that’s all it takes to get him to stand still. Hyrule silently marvels at this as he sends a jolt of magic through the bruise, wiping it away easily. Blue tolerates the contact for only as long as it takes the magic to do its work, and then he’s stepping back out of reach - and grabbing the fish, insistently trying to hand it over.

Hyrule sighs and grabs it by the tail. “Alright, alright. Thank you. And thank you for letting me heal you.” He smiles.

Still wary, still hesitant, Blue doesn’t smile back. But some of the ever-present tension has gone out of him, and he softens when his brother leans into him with a smile big enough for both of them.

[naffeclipse]

Naff, just wow.

Immediately after I finished reading the CS chapter the tears came all at once, streaming down my face and leaving wet streaks down both of my cheeks. It is hard to make me cry like that. I’m floored, just completely stunned.

I’m soooo happy you gave us a chapter like this, giving the characters and the reader a safe space to digest and get some questions answered. It was also much needed after the action filled chapters before it and it’s a nice resting stop before the horrors waiting before us.

Naff, you write so beautifully, I’m looking back at the lines of text I saved to keep for this comment and I’m gonna cry again from just reading them! (Also sorry,, this is gonna be a long one,,,)

They ate and came back to your trailer, where all of your weapons reside. Holy water, silver knives, and bolts, the Latin incantations to exercise beings just like them.

Just, I’m crying at this. To me it holds so much emotional weight. This story is so close to my heart you don’t even know AAAAAAAA

The repeating “Eat.”, “Please. Eat.” and finally “Ask, then eat.” has me on the floor weeping and I don’t know exactly why. Just the ‘ask’ before the ‘eat’ feels so calm and like they’ve fully opened up. Ready to answer any question.

“Yes,” Moon answers softly. “We ate their hearts.”

You jerk in your shock, almost flinging the egg and sausage bit off of your utensil and to the floor.

“You ate his heart?”

Moon becomes completely still. He stares blankly at you then at your chest.

I swear they can’t keep doing this! But they must! But please phrase it differently boys! XD

The nature of the demonic cryptid before you tumbles through your brain and into your heart—a monster that protects children. An instinct to reject it as a fairy tale touches your nerves. It’s too good to be true, that’s too romantic to believe a being of teeth and claws would seek to protect vulnerable children.

Again, your writing!! And AAAAA IT IS TOO ROMANTIC TO BE TRUE BUT IT’S!!!!!

I’m so happy mothman came up again! And slkfdlfkfsahvjdf that whole bit was so needed oh man!! Perfect way to break the tension! “You killed it,” “It’s not your boyfriend.” FDKLKFSAJKADFG

I love that Y/N isn’t afraid of Eclipse, they’re afraid of Eclipse hurting others. This is why they love Y/N, their heart is filled with only compassion and an undying will to protect others. That scene by the gully, my brows still hurt from how much I was furrowing and straining them, I was at the edge of tears the whole way through. (I’m crying rn reading it again)

“Life means much to you, we understand—”

“No, you don’t! You don’t know the value of life at all,” you jab your finger at him, hitting the yellow button on his chassis, “If you did, you wouldn’t kill an innocent person!”

*WAILING*

“Heart, we have acted too long upon fear.” He holds your gaze, their voices low and rumbling with pangs of remorse and pleas. “We are still learning, but we want to show you that we are better for it.”

*LOUD SOBBING*

And the vow!! aaAAAA!!!!

Deep in the darkness of your sleep, your fist closes around their true hand, and squeezes.

They hum low, rumbling you into ease with a purr of promise.

They are yours.

I’m fucking CRYING!!!!!

The back rubs have me absolutely MELTING! that’s how touch starved I am at this point

Oh and the hug KILLED ME!!! OH MY GOD THEY NEEDED THAT. I THINK I NEEDED IT MORE THO. AAAAAAAAAAAAA Thank you for that :’>

The slow slooooow build of trust, acceptance and some fragments of happiness coming back was a wonder to read! And the still lurking distrust in the form of the salt shaker is tugging at my heartstrings so hard I think I’m gonna cry again..

Absolutely AMAZING chapter as always!!!

I told you before but please, pleeeeease don’t worry about taking your time with your writing. Waiting one month between chapters is nothing. I’d wait an eternity if necessary❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Meep, I'm gonna melt into a puddle, please!!! I'm thrilled that you enjoyed this chapter and I'm seeping into the floor knowing you like it so much! I also love that you shared your favorite paragraphs/quotes because alsdjflasdfj it's always a warm-fuzzing feeling when I hear what people were affected by!

Thankfully I won't make you wait a full month again, but I do appreciate it ♥ ♥ ♥

Ah, thank you so much, babe! ♥

[cozyforjate]

The Spapel scene we got in this episode was so good!

Spoilers ahead!

Don't read if you haven't watched the episode yet.

.

.

Spock and Chapel are HOT!

The way they flirt with each other?

The dialog? “Mr. Spock am i boring you? “Decidedly NOT”

The way they look at each other?

And that wink in the end??

I was like “Get a room you two!”

Christine is being Christine… She is afraid of commitment, she is afraid of getting hurt in the end. So she just wants to see where this is going first before she can ever call this “a relationship”

Spock on the other hand is ALL IN! He’s ready to announce to everyone that they’re together but will respect Christine’s choice. Spock is basically saying “Your move” to Christine. If she wants to take things slow, then they’re gonna take things slow.

Spock seems pretty sad when Christine says “A messy metaphor. Just like whatever this is.”

Christine picks up on his body language and wants to explain her point in better words. She lets him know that she’s afraid of putting a label on their relationship, making it official, only to lose it…

“Our quantum cat might dissapear”… Now Spock is afraid of it too! He doesn’t want to lose Christine, he wants them to work.

“I'd just as soon let it live, see how big it grows” There’s hope in her eyes which reflects on Spock’s eyes. She wants them to work too!  

Kirk assumes Uhura was the one distracting Spock but i think he was already distracted before Uhura interrupted them. And no i don’t mean the relationship talk. Christine winking at Spock and then saying “Your move” was the ultimate distraction! She said it in such a way that for a second i thought i heard “How about you take me to bed NOW”.

Can we please get BTS videos of Ethan Peck and Jess Bush pretending to play 3D chess in the background?

[teddybeartoji]

MICKEYYY i’m sneaking out of my blanket fort… leaving a treat and some flowers on ur bed (ominously)……. 🥞🌻🌷🌹🛌 i hope ur day is going super nicely !! :33 IT’S TECHNICALLY SPRING HOW R WE FEELING it’s still gray n sludgy here :((( but i hope it’s better where u are !!!

anyway anyway i just wanted to check in w u BUT i also wanted to ask….. what hq ep are u on + who r ur faves so far ?? 👀👀 idk if u’ve met noya and asahi yet but i love them sm they’re my pookies. IT’S SUCH A FEEL-GOOD SHOW ISN’T IT it makes me smile sm too !! T—T

ily mickey i’m crawling back into the blanket fort (sneakily) (ominously)….. tell armin i love him <3

ARIIIIII MY LITTLE IRIS<33333333 i love me some ominous flowers mwahahahaha thank you they're so beautiful!!!!! IT'S VERY MUCH SPRING HERE TODAY!!!! idk how long that's gonna last but today is super super good!!! it's sunny and it's not too cold either wahhhhh i'm automatically feeling so fresh n hyped lmao I'M GONNA SEND SOME OF THE SUN TO YOU THOUGH I'LL CUT IT IN HALF AND YOU'LL GET THE BIGGER SIDE I PROMISE!!!!!

here's the guy!!!! we just went outside we both wanted to feel the sun<333333 i wanted to go to the park but uhhhh my period kinda has me in lockdown though💀💀💀 fuck that bitch but even that little piece of sun made me feel so much better already🌻🌻🌻🌻

HQQQQQQQQQ I LOVE IT SOOOOO MUCH!!!!! i'm currently on season2 ep 12!!!!! I DON'T THINK I CAN PICK A FAVOURITE THOUGHHHHHH LIKE I LOVE THEM ALL THEY'RE ALL A BUNCH OF CUTIES ok maybe hinata is my favourite................ HOW COULD HE NOT BEEEEEEEEE HE'S A LITTLE RAY OF SUNSHINEE I NEED TO PUT HIM IN MY POCKET he gets so excited over everything and ahhhh he just means the world to me.....

i was gonna make fun of his height the other day bc he really is super tiny next to all of the other players but that was until he said that he's 163cm and................................................................................. i can't really make fun of him if we're LITERALLY the same height now can i.....💀

pls i almost cried already too...... the eps with tsukishima and his brother:((((((((((((((( when he saw that he wasn't even on the court:(((( yeah that got me a little bit but i'm so happy that he's more comfortable on the team now and that he's enjoying it!!!!!!!! i love him.

kuroo is so funny too............. hehehhehehe gojo has transformed into a high schooler....................................... pls the scene where tsukki asks him why is he even giving them advice when they're techically rivals and he just goes "well, i've just always been a really nice person" as the lighting is making him seem like some angel ahsghghasghaghah so silly i loved it a lot

WAITT BUT I ALSO LOVE NOYA AND ASAHI AAAAAAAAAAAA i've never loved the whole cast of a show this is kinda crazy. everybody being so afraid of asahi just bc of his size is so funny poor guy lmao ALSO bc you know i'm on my voice actor bs did u know that asahi's va is the guy who also voices kunikida??????????????????? SO COOL

OHHHHH ANDD WHEN HINATA AND KAGEYAMA FINALLY GOT THAT FAST ATTACK RIGHT???????????? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THAT WAS SOOOOO CUTE I LOVE HOW EXCITED THEY ALL GET WHEN THEY GET A POINT and i love how much they all praise each other all around????? "nice receive" and "don't worry about it" and "we got the next one"????????????????? wahhhh it really is a feel good show my cheeks hurt from watching it

i think i have an extra soft spot for sugawara too!!!!! he deserves his own little mention he's a sweetheart

THIS GOT SO LONG AGAIN WHEWW BUT I REALLY AM ENJOYING IT I LOVE THEM ALLL SO SO SO MUCH they all deserve a good hair ruffle (coach ukai is getting a cheek kiss he's so fine) WAIT ALSO I LOVE THE GIRLS!!! THE MANAGERS!!!!! THEY'RE SO SWEET OH AND TAKEDA TOOO FUCKKK I JUST LOVE EVERYBODY OKAY<333

too much love i might die ari please hold me..... cue very dramatic sigh.... IS YOUR BLANKET FORT COMFY DO YOU WANT ME TO MAKE IT BIGGER? BETTER? DO YOU WANT MORE SNACKS? TEA? COFFEE? MORE PILLOWS MORE BLANKETS????????? I NEED TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE FEELING GOOD THIS IS A MUST!!!! YOU'RE MY NR.1 PRIORITY!!!!!!! anyway i hope the sun will come out soon for you too i'm making the call rn I LOVE YOUUUU<333333

[amazingmsme]

Pre-Infusion Pity Party ramble under the cut but I’m just so overwhelmed rn & just want to get it all out

But god do I hate being like this. Why do I have to get stabbed in the chest every fucking month with a big ass needle, & pumped full of chemicals every other month just so I can fucking live? Why did my life have to change so much when I was just a kid? There’s gonna come a time where I’ve been knowingly living with this disease for longer than I had without it, & I don’t know how I’ll feel when that day comes. Rare disease awareness day just happened & I completely forgot & didn’t even care. It’s coming up on the 7 year anniversary of my outbreak, & it’s always a rough time for me

& to make matters worse, for over a fucking year it feels like older family members are dropping like flies. I don’t even know how many funerals I’ve been to in the past year. & we have yet another one on Sunday. & you see the toll it takes on everyone around you & you’re just like… are they next? Are they gonna be taken away?

I don’t have any irl friends because my supposed best friends stabbed me in the back & burned our friendship to the ground over a long torturous year, & while I am genuinely so much happier without them in my life, I feel so isolated. When I try to talk & engage with people, they act like you’re a fucking freak for trying to have a human conversation. Everyone is afraid of interaction now, & it sucks because humans are supposed to be social creatures. & it hurts because I’ve missed out on so much social interaction with my peers when I was & I know that my disease played a pretty big hand in that because I was the sick kid. Other mothers said shit to my mom’s face about how healthy their kids were, & even family members implied shit, essentially blaming her for my illness/weak immune system

& then you get diagnosed & those people fucking grovel & act so sorry & sympathetic but you know their true hypocritical character. It’s honestly revealed the ugliest of humanity. True sympathy is rare I feel like, replaced with pity

& I hate to say it, but most of the time, I don’t even like what I’m writing. There’s a line in Rainbow Rowell’s book Fangirl where Cath was reflecting on herself & her writers block/fics she’s written where she contemplates how many times she’s written this line, or some version of it? & I get caught up writing things others want to see, but the writing itself feels like a chore. & it’s not the fact that I think what I’m writing is bad, but I feel nothing.

I’m writing for fandoms & characters I’m not particularly wild about, & feel obligated to fulfill the request. Tbh there were only a handful of tickletober fics that I was actually excited about writing, & I fucking hate that. It’s why I was so over the moon when all the Hatchetfield & Epic peeps started showing up. Because I felt inspired again, & I can’t remember the last time I felt a spark like that

I haven’t been truly happy in a very long time, & I’m not sure when they’ll get better. But there’s still glimmers of light through the storm… even if they’re small or fleeting

TLDR: I’m fucking sick of getting infusions for the rest of my life, people all around me are dying, my best friends betrayed me, & I’ve been in one of the biggest creative slumps