#i don’t want my current life to be directly associated with stuff i was drawing in high school and early college 😬

[sharkieboi]

want to start posting my art again here on tumblr cause i need to share my dnd blorbo stuff and i was like “maybe i’ll use my old art blog wouldn’t that be a great archive of my really old art too!” so i went to check it out and I know we have to let go of cringe to be free but i will absolutely not be posting my art to that account and letting people associate my old stuff with any of my new stuff 😬

[gojology]

Lovebirds.

𝑨𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒐𝒓'𝒔 𝑵𝒐𝒕𝒆 |  omg this is my first request. ilysm anon, im now feelin super cool. also, i just realized i put recc (as in recommended) instead of requests. i’m super stupid LOL. anyways, im touch starved too dw bby, i’m servin u up a long one since i rlly like this request and after all u r my first! 𝑷𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 | Gojo x Wife! Reader 𝑾𝒐𝒓𝒅 𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒕 | 2307 𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔 | None! 𝑺𝒖𝒎𝒎𝒂𝒓𝒚 | Coming home from a long mission in America, precisely 1 year, you’re excited to catch up on Gojo’s students, Nanami, and just Gojo in general.   Leaning out of the car window, resting your arm against your purse, you sighed. A humid wind brushed against your skin, tickling you. It had been quite a while since you had been in Japan, spending almost a year on a huge mission in America. You had killed a battalion worthy amount of special grades.   You spent most of your time in America in mostly horribly rundown places, equally as infested with curses. Although you found yourself enjoying America’s natural beauty, further away from the city life that many of the Americans found themselves enjoying, you much preferred Japan. after all, it was your home, and where you met Gojo Satoru. It would be another day until you could return, and you had gone through hundreds of scenarios of finally being in his arms again, but nonetheless, you were ecstatic at the thought of your husband’s touch.   Your phone’s notification chimed loudly, you threw your phone onto the other seat, heart jumping up to a high rate. It was a recording of Satoru loudly yelling, “OPEN YOUR FUCKING PHONE!” with a flurry of giggles afterwards.    Ijichi jumped, turning left and right. Whispering under his breath, he let out an exasperated sigh, switching the music channel.    The recording was mostly because of the time you had to ghost him due to work. Gojo had snuck on and recorded it, doing some magical tech stuff and giving you the custom notification sound. You had kept it that way ever since, since secretly, you enjoyed that you were so badly wanted by Gojo, that, and you had no idea how to change it back.    But the custom notification was sweet as well.   You smiled to yourself every time you heard it, a familiar twinge of pain flashing inside of you whenever you realized you wouldn’t be able to see him for a while.   Well, today, and the days after that would be different. You’d be able to finally see Gojo again, and his new students that he always frantically texted you about. Nanami, an old friend of Gojo, and also an old friend of yours, would also be there to welcome you back, you found yourself reminiscing about them.   You had heard so much about them, one of the kids being Sukuna’s vessel, you wondered how Gojo could contain such a fear, being around the kid at all times, he always told you about how the kid was actually energetic and happy and an overall great kid, you had heard about Nanami, finally coming back into the jujutsu sorcerer field of work, even though you always found that he still had a thing for finances.   You shook your head, “Save that shit for later, (Y/N).” muttering to yourself, you didn’t want to think of anything but Gojo, after all, it had been one fucking year of being deprived of the man you loved most. You were practically starving for the guy, in more ways than one.   Ijichi gulped, facing towards you, one hand on his steering wheel, “Forgive me Mrs. Satoru, but um.. Forgive me if I misheard, but I think I heard your phones notification go off.. Due to the ah- incredibly loud profanity.”   Now just realizing that you had completely forgotten about the phone notification, you nodded your thanks to Ijichi, a warmth rushing to your cheeks before opening up your phone.    In the small, rounded box containing Gojo’s message, he wrote in all caps, “SUGAR, MY BELOVED, MY QUEEN, HOW CLOSE ARE YOU? I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT I’M LITERALLY BOUNCING UP AND DOWN IN OUR BED.”   Smiling to yourself, you furiously texted back, “Calm down honeybun, I’ll be there in like, 24 hours, I’m not even fucking close.”   You almost instantly got a DM back, making you jump a bit in your seat. Even with the 5 years of friendship, and the 3 years of relationship, and the 2 years of marriage, he still almost always texted you back as quickly as possible.   “God I can’t fucking wait for you to meet the kids! We’ll keep it a surprise, yeah? We have a bunch of treats, and we also got the kids to get some gifts for you! How thoughtful aren’t they? They’re MY offspring by the way, so like, you know, whenever you want a kid, it’s your call ;)”   You snorted to yourself, smiling. He genuinely seemed so excited, and it was all shining through even though it was from a screen.    “Maybe in a few years, I don’t even wanna imagine a little you.”   Despite the excited, bubbling feeling brewing bigger and bigger in your stomach, you figured it’d be best to sleep before the chaos. Happily sighing, you laid down, using your purse as a pillow, drifting into a blissful sleep.  ‧₊˚✩彡.   You awoke to a sudden halt, Looking around your surroundings, you figured you were home. Ijichi looked like he was damn near about to fall asleep on the steering wheel.   Well, maybe that’s what 24 hours of constant driving did to you. You fished around in your purse, silently cursing looking for a water bottle.   “Here, Ijichi, looks like you ran a marathon.” you grinned, handing the slightly crumped water bottle to him.   He beamed as if a guardian angel had descended down and gave him a trillion dollars.   “Mrs. Satoru! You really mean it? The ride was nothing, I was merely instructed to do so and I would’ve done it happily regardless.”   You waved your hand, as a dismissal of the conversation. “You overwork yourself Ijichi, go catch a break, on me. If Gojo tears you apart, tell him he won’t be getting any pussy from me for another year.”   Ichiji nodded vigorously, before dashing off, probably towards a massage center, God that guy needed it. ‧₊˚✩彡.    Gojo frantically hopped up and down, it had been a day, now he was just waiting for you to bust through the door in your wild hair, his legs sprawled onto the whole of a couch, he stared at the ceiling, a dopey smile spread across his face.     “Satoru. (Y/N) will not even want to be associated with you, looking at your current state.” he remarked, staring at the sorcerer with his strikingly dead eyes.     “Nanami, how the fuck am I supposed to act calm?! I’ve waited for this moment for ONE YEAR! Does my hair look normal?!”    “Your hair looks just like an albino porcupine, just as usual.” Flipping the page of his newspaper, he sighed, rubbing his temples. “I will never understand how someone like (Y/N) would be.. Interested in you, Satoru.”     Gojo paid no attention to the insult Nanami had so clearly made, his ears were perked up, eavesdropping on a distant conversation coming closer and closer.     “Gojo-Senpai was telling me about this movie while training my cursed energy! He basically spoiled the whole thing but he told me that the main character was super annoying but apparently she dies in the end in the most gruesome way possible! It’s worth the watch, your soul will feel cleansed as soon as you see her lifeless body!”     “Yuuji, you literally spoiled the whole thing to me just now.” Fushiguro calmly stated, looking bored out of his mind.     “Oh, oops.” Yuuji rubbed the back of his neck. He smiled coyly, tightly hugging his present.    “What’s with the decorations, Gojo-Sensei?” inquired Nobara, stroking her warm toned brown hair. She had figured it was something about the presents that Gojo had forced the trio to get, but he never told them who it was for.    The room had been decorated with various balloons and confetti, scattered about, on the table and the ground. A cake box wrapped with a gigantic bow limply guarded whoever was brave enough to get their hands on something that Gojo seemed to be protecting with his life.    A pink table cover with a crudely drawn Gojo and what would seem to be a girl, a heart in the middle of the pair. In a horrible font with an even awfuller text, the text on top and at the bottom of the drawing proudly stated:    “WELCOME BACK QT”    “-YOU’RE HUSBAND AND THE CREW”    Nobara stood in distaste, trying to disguise the face she made. The drawing, the misused you’re, and the overall poor design choice was enough to almost make her vomit.     Nobara, about to make her distasteful statements about the whole mess, was suddenly shut up as Gojo started hopping up and down, looking directly at his phone.   “SHE’S COMING! SHE’S COMING! EVERYONE IN YOUR PLACES!”    Now, seeing Gojo freak out wasn’t outside of the ordinary, but it was to see him freak out to this extent. He was hopping up and down, blabbering about a certain woman named (Y/N). Nobara was pretty sure that if a curse attacked right now, even a special grade comparable to the one with the uncomplete domain could completely crush Gojo, the guy seemed completely unaware of the example he was setting to the kids. Even Yuuji stood in disbelief, and he had seen multiple tantrums by Gojo.   Nanami, however, licked his finger and flipped the newspaper page. A face of boredom obviously displayed.     Nobara, preparing herself to chew Gojo out about how utterly stupid and embarrassing he made the whole class of jujutsu sorcerers look like, stopped wide eyed as she looked at the doors slide wide open. ‧₊˚✩彡.    You stood, shyly, looking at the ground. Gojo dove headfirst into your arms, laughing like a maniac and digging his face into your shoulder. You breathed in his scent, scanning the room.     Three teens, sat wide-eyed, backs straight as they looked at you with eyes you couldn’t quite read. All three of them held presents.     The one with eyelids underneath his eyes (which you assumed was Yuuji, the vessel of Sukuna) eyed you curiously, his eye twitched.     The other boy, one with wild black-blue hair, sat mouth agape, before closing it. He looked like he was about to say something, before stopping entirely and hugging his present closer to his chest.    The warm haired girl darted her eyes between you two, seemingly trying to put the puzzle together.     Nanami put the newspaper down, glancing over to you two.    “This is obviously Gojo-Senpai’s wife. He hasn’t seen her in many months, and as you can see, really really misses her.” he paused, a small smile spreading on his face, a rare sight.     “I don’t even know why myself, but what can you do with lovebirds?” he thought aloud, his attention now focused to the two of you furiously making out, hands in places Yuuji and the crew didn’t need to see.    “Satoru, (Y/N), leave the kissing for later. Don’t you see the kids?”     You detached yourself from his mouth, panting for breath. The air being exhaled out of his nose fanned over your face, you had just now realized the kids again.     “Satoru, lets sit down. I bet the kids are surprised. “ you motioned to the couch. Gojo whined.     “What? They’re not that dumb, they can tell you’re my wife or at least, you’re my girlfriend, just by the way we kiss right? Isn’t this telling enough?”     “You didn’t tell them about me, ever did you?”     He sighed in defeat, holding tightly onto your arm as you dragged him over and sat down on the comfortable couch, opposite of Yuuji and the crew. Nanami scooched over, before finally getting up to pull another chair from somewhere else. Grunting, he excused himself from the room.     “YOU HAD A GIRLFRIEND, GOJO-SENPAI? AND DIDN’T TELL US?” Yuuji questioned, looking like he was about to faint.    Gojo laughed, snuggling deeper onto you, almost like a koala.     “She’s my wife, aren’t you, sugar? Did you even pay attention to anything Nanami said? He literally said she was my wife.”     Megumi made an obvious gagging sound, but even he didn’t seem as bored as he was usually. He actually looked intrigued.     “Why didn’t you tell us, Gojo-Senpai?” the girl nagged, slamming her fist down on the table.     Gojo smiled, “Uh, well, I wanted it to be a surprise when she came back.”     “Couldn’t you have told us that you had a wife or something?” Megumi butt in.    The door slid open, Nanami coming in with a wooden stool.     “Knowing Gojo-Senpai, that probably went over his head.” grunting as he placed the wooden stool down and sat, he opened his newspaper again.     “Where do you guys know eachother?”    “Was Gojo-Senpai handsome back in highschool too?”    “Do you know what lipgloss Gojo-Senpai wears?”    “Gojo-Senpai, how did you know you loved her?”     “Gojo-Senpai, can we eat now?”     “Do you know why Gojo has such a horrible sweet tooth?”      Before you could even respond, Nanami put his hand up.     “Now, now, lets let the happy couple settle down.” he cleard his throat, not even making eye contact with anyone but the newspaper.     An audible chorus of groans sounded, “What do you expect us to do? We literally just met her!” moaned Yuuji.    “Weren’t you the one that literally asked if we could eat yet?”    Yuuji immediately shut up afterwards.     “Yuuji, she just came back from a 1 day trip. She should be laying down comfortably with Gojo-Senpai and they should be catching up. You’ll have the opportunity to talk to her and learn about her later. Right now she needs space.”    “But-” Nobara whined, clasping her hands together.    Nanami turned to Fushiguro, but even he had his mind set. “I didn’t even begin to think that Gojo had a wife. I really want to know more about her, if you think about it, this is all Gojo-Sensei’s fault.”    Nanami rubbed his temples, staring at the two of you for backup, realizing that you two were making out again.    Nanami sighed, 10 years later and you two were still the same.    

[amethystdarkwolf]

My ‘Orange Side’ predictions, theories and a lot of Logan angst.

So I've had this theory for a hot second, and only recently decided to finally sit down and write it out. This goes on for quite a bit, and is a little bit on the heavier side, as it has my predictions for the last dark side, and a bunch of little patterns that are interesting to point out, that mostly lead to angst.

Okay, enjoy!

TL;DR is right before the little bonus thing at the end that's just more angst stuff for Logan that kind of applies.

So if you've been in the fandom for really any amount of time, you will know about The Rainbow Theory. Basically, all it is, is that the sides colors will make up the rainbow, and it seems to be nearly canon. We have all the colors except one. And that color is Orange.

Using the knowledge that this side will (most likely) be orange, we have a clue about him. That he's watching, and that he's aware of the audience.

From 26:34 to 26:44, in the upper left hand corner there is a score in orange text, the number is '07734'. Now, if you were to put that number into a calculator and turn it upside down, it would spell out, 'hello.'

Now this is mostly common knowledge at this point due to the fandom (me included) absolutely losing it over the hint of a new dark side. Especially since he shows up seemingly out of nowhere. I just needed to get those establishing bits out of the way before I continued on with the theory so it's a tiny bit easier to track my thinking (I tend to not explain my points correctly before moving onto the next one so I hope I did a better job of it this time through).

He is speaking to us. He's not saying hello to Patton or Roman or even Thomas! They don't even notice it! He is speaking to the viewer, which leads to the question of what exactly this side knows, and more importantly what this side is capable of.

There is also speculation that this dark side is going to be somehow attached to or the opposite of Logan. The opposite of Logic, that implication alone should be at least a little unsettling. Now, I love Logan, I love him a lot, him and Janus are my favorites. But he does seem to have kind of not the best relations with the others at times. However, I do not think we've reached him actually despising any side, not even Remus or Janus. I think that is going to change.

The color schemes Thomas and the team have been using are really clever. They convey a lot about the character just by having the color associated with them. They have also been working with the idea of opposites. And those opposites seem to conflict quite often.

What I mean is, violet on the color wheel is the opposite of yellow. Virgil and Janus' colors. Now, it is very, very plain to see that Virgil and Janus do not get along. Whatever history they have is still up in the air for specifics, but it's obvious that they have one. And at least Virgil hates Janus.

Red and green are also opposites on the color wheel. Even though they have barely interacted, it's clear by Roman's language towards Remus that they don't have the best relationship. Roman breaks down at the mention that him and Remus are similar. Also the funhouse simile, (DWIT: 35:56) "It's a little like, looking into a funhouse mirror,  but instead of a giant head, or, like, long legs and a tiny torso... It shows you... Everything you don't want to be."   That's more than enough evidence to prove they aren't on the best terms.

Now, onto blue. Blue, more specifically, Logan's shade of blue, is opposite to orange. And judging by the pattern we see developing with the opposite colors. Logan will not like the orange side one bit. Hold onto that piece of information for a moment while I make a few more predictions based on some more patterns.

Someone has already pointed this out, (if someone will be so kind as to remind me of who pointed this out that would be lovely <3), but back in Moving On Part 2, in the background, there is a picture hanging on the wall that will typically change  to fit whatever topic they're currently on, (ex: it changed to a picture of Thomas preforming in the show he won the golden apple for when it was brought up, or a zoomed in picture of the children's book he made.) At 1:30 the picture changes to show Thomas doing the 'speak no evil, hear no evil and see no evil' poses. (Covering his mouth, ears and eyes)

The dark sides and Virgil seem to each have a connection to one of these.

Virgil: See no evil. (Embarrassing Phases: 7:32. Virgil makes the room go completely black, blocking everyone's field of vision while he changed Logan's costume.)

Janus: Speak no evil. (Self-explanatory)

Remus: Hear no evil. (DWIT: 5:36-5:48. Remus muffles the other sides conversation, making Thomas hear him clearer than anyone else with the "Have you ever imagined killing your brother?" line.)  

The last one in that same vein, would be 'do no evil'.

So what does this pattern have to do with the other patterns I've pointed out?

Well, in order to get there, I need to point out, yet another pattern. (I'm so sorry)

Logan has always been a bit more physical than the rest of the sides I think. I don't really like using pre-Fitting In information in my theories, as I'm unsure of exactly how much they had planned at that point?, but I'm unsure of how to explain my point that well without this example. In Accepting Anxiety part 1, at 6:36 you can see Thomas rubbing the back of his head where he was hit with the laptop, immediately after, you can see Logan do the same thing.

To me this sort of establishes that what happens to Thomas can happen to Logan, making him a bit more of a physical presence than the others. The brain is what stimulates pain after all, it controls all the nerve endings and pain receptors.

Another much looser example, is his puppet choice in LNTAO, the whole 'not made of felt' thing was most likely just because of what Logan said that y'know, he didn't feel anything. It is also the fact of, all of the others puppets had felt somewhere on them, except his. Which makes the puppet, in contrast, feel more sturdy and physical.

I don't think this one applies all too much, but it is worth noting that out of all of the sides, Logan tends to always end up holding something/having something more physical in his possession more than the others. (Moving on being the exception)

The note cards.

The yerkes-dodson curve chart.

In Can Lying Be Good he was given a little headset.

Logic Vs. Passion he had a notebook (Which also made an appearance in Embarrassing Phases) as well as the drawings and graphs, while he wasn't physically holding them, they were real and not animation like Roman's examples.

(If you wanna count the crofters go ahead...?)

LNTAO also had the paper ball throwing physically hurting Roman.

In SvS when he was summoned (lmao summoned to appear in court I just got that as I was typing this out.) He is holding a law book.

In DWIT he gets physically hurt, twice. Having his teeth pulled out, and the throwing star. [Side note: the little interaction at 19:07 could also apply here, showing how he's more grounded as he stays almost completely still when Remus practically jump scares him.]

In the Healthy Distractions video he has what I'm assuming is coffee-

Then in the redux, he physically ends up hurting Patton by popping up too close. An odd little detail that really didn't apply, don't you think? And it's immediately followed up with Patton reiterating that they were just figments of Thomas' imagination.

Logan is much more grounded in reality and more physical than the other sides. Which is a very good thing for Logic to be, that's what it has to be.

Now what is the actual theory?

Virgil can blind the others

Remus can mute the others

Janus can silence the others

My theory is that the 'orange side' is going to have the ability to physically or mentally control the others.

And Logan is going to be his chosen victim, at least at first.

Logan is going to have an antagonistic relationship with this side because of the fact that he takes control away from him. Which order and control is what Logan seems to thrive on!

Keeping schedules, having everything in order, being taken seriously, attempting to make sure that Thomas is punctual, all of those things are Logan trying to maintain control. Now that isn't a bad thing in this circumstance at least, he's trying to make sure Thomas doesn't do anything that would cause his life to devolve into chaos.

But when it's taken away from him it's going to send him into some kind of spiral, and lead to his two-part video. Losing control of things is scary as hell. It was one of the points brought up as to why Remus was being a pest more than usual (DWIT: 29:37-29:56). And obviously being ignored and pushed to the side isn't helping either. It could just be the straw that breaks the camels back.

Long story short, Logan's arc is going to be directly tied to that other dark side, at least in my predictions.

And it's going to hurt.

Okay, this last little bit, is purely speculation, with very little connection to anything in canonicity. All of the dark traits seem to have a connection to some kind of animal, and they're typically ones that are seen as gross or creepy in some form, spider, snake, octopus.

What if the last dark side's animal was some kind of bug? A beetle or something. Like seriously the thought of a bright orange beetle or cockroach is, disgusting.

The only reason I'm saying this is because of a random thought I had. We all know Logan's 'robot' persona he puts up, he can't feel anything, he's mechanical, right? Well, a side coming in and completely flipping all of that on it's head, and ruining the control Logan had...

That would be a real bug in the system, now wouldn't it?

Well! Thank you for reading through all of this! I know it got a bit long-winded I just like having as much evidence as possible before stating a theory.

But those were just my thoughts and I'd love to hear yours! So please tell me what you think!!!

TL;DR: My prediction is that the orange side will be able to take control over the other sides, and he will take control of Logan which would cause Logan to spiral enough to warrant his two part video.

------------

BONUS: Some more angsty bits about Logan and control, that didn't apply to the theory too much! 

So first off, to me Logan seems like a very straight-forward (ha.) problem solver. If there is a problem there is no need to go through extensive loopholes or anything, no emotional mires or musical numbers unless necessary, the problem just needs to be fixed, period end of sentence.

I have a feeling that Logan applies that same logic to himself.

In the videos prior to Losing My Motivation, Logan was very very happy and bubbly. Easily excited and willing to participate in things he probably wouldn't have otherwise. He was much more expressive. (I know this is most likely because he was not a fully fleshed out character yet, but it can tie into some angst.)

Then in Losing My Motivation, Logan was brought the conclusion that he was the problem. (Note: this was also where the infinitesimal mistake was also made.)

From then on, we can slowly see minor changes to him in the videos, he starts becoming more reserved, serious, as well as trying new things to sort of fit in? (i.e the note cards) He saw the problem, and he tried to fix it. He became the definite voice of reason. Him smiling also went down a lot.

Looking back on this better explains why Logan was so upset at the beginning of Logic Vs. Passion, 2:28-2:41. To him he's already fixed his problem, he's fixed himself, he was the problem, how could Thomas run into this problem again!

Then we get to the crofters musical, where he just completely drops his walls down and sings and has fun with something he enjoys. Then of course, Virgil and Patton kinda come and unintentionally embarrass him. And he starts getting more feelings of inadequacy which build up to the whole problem of LNTAO.

Then in SvS almost his entire time on the witness stand was Janus subtly poking at him, and at 15:04, he talks about wanting to make sure Thomas is punctual and productive. He in fact calls it his passion project, something he is PASSIONATE ABOUT.

After two or three years, Logan is still trying to fix the problem. He's still trying to fix himself.

Now this link to control is mostly in what Logan is trying to get Thomas to do, be punctual, follow schedules, produce adequate content at a steady pace, and follow the same pattern every day, according to the chart in Logic Vs. Passion. This habit forming, tends to nearly eliminate variables from Thomas' life. Earning Logan more control. Which is clearly what he's wanting, as he feels that is the way to prevent problems from happening.

[kurowrites]

“so like, i know we broke up and stuff but funny story, i haven’t told my family yet and they just assumed you’d be coming with me for [insert family celebration] and i really don’t know how to tell them and i know this is really selfish but i can’t break my great grandma’s heart like that, she’ll probably have a heart attack and– wait what? you’d do that for me? holy shit, i love you… wait–” LWJ/WWX

As Wei Ying rings the doorbell, his heart is in his throat. He can’t remember another time in recent history when he felt this nervous. He’s often accused of being shameless and rarely minds it, but even he thinks that begging at your ex-boyfriend’s door is pretty close to the top of the list of shameless things. He had to steel himself in the hallway for five minutes before he finally decided to go through with it. He thought about simply sending a text, but no. If he actually wants to go through with this, he has to face Lan Zhan directly. Everything else would be disrespectful to Lan Zhan, especially if it’s Wei Ying asking for the favour. So, he rings the doorbell, and tries to ignore the violent thundering of his own heart.

This will be the first time that he comes face to face with Lan Zhan since their break-up a year ago.

For a little while after the break-up, Wei Ying had been convinced he would crumble to pieces simply by seeing Lan Zhan’s face. He’s still not entirely sure if he’s going to be okay once he actually sees Lan Zhan, but the current situation leaves him no other choice. Sooner or later, he will have to face Lan Zhan again, he tells himself. It’s been a year, too. Lan Zhan has probably moved on by now. There’s nothing to be afraid of.

There is no immediate reaction after he’s rung the doorbell, and the silence in the hallway extends for so long that Wei Ying is already convinced Lan Zhan isn’t even home. He’s just about to turn away when the door opens, and Lan Zhan stands in the doorframe, looking at him.

Wei Ying is robbed of his breath. Lan Zhan looks better than ever in a stylish white sweater with zippers at the wrists and grey slacks, his long hair carefully bound back. Fuck. In terms of looks, Lan Zhan has always been a 13.

“Uh… hi,” Wei Ying stutters, and it’s at this point that his rational brain finally decides to start working. In fact, it starts screaming at him something along the lines of ‘What the fuuuuck are you doing here?’ Lan Zhan is obviously doing well without Wei Ying, and he really doesn’t need to be pulled back into the mess that Wei Ying’s life generally is.

Lan Zhan keeps staring at him, probably calculating how rude it would be to just slam the door into Wei Ying’s face, and if he can live with being that rude. Eventually, however, he seems to decide to be civil.

“Hello, Wei Ying,” he says.

His name on Lan Zhan’s lips is enough to make Wei Ying weak in the knees. He’s missed it – the way only Lan Zhan can say his name. It gives him a funny, tickling feeling deep inside his chest.

But he’s not here for this, for being mushy and reminiscing about the past, so he shakes himself out of his stupor.

“So,” he starts, clearing his throat nervously. “Funny story. You remember Granny Yu? I might have, uh, forgotten to tell her that you and I broke up, and uh, she just told be she’s looking forward to seeing you at Jiang Fengmian’s 60th birthday this Sunday. And well… she was always such a fan of you, and she always told me that I did something right when I started dating you, and… she’s already so old, you know. Who knows how long she might still live? I don’t want to disappoint her, and make her worry about me, so, well… I thought it would be really nice if you could come with me? Just that day? For her sake? And obviously I’ll owe you a favour, and I’ll help you with anything you want me to if you do this for me. I know I have no right to ask, but this is like, really important to me–”

Wei Ying is aware that he’s rambling, but he cannot help it. Lan Zhan is still standing there, beautiful and still as if he’s carved out of marble, and Wei Ying still vividly remembers the time when he was welcome in those arms, when an embrace from Lan Zhan meant comfort and safety. When Lan Zhan’s affection gave him relief, and not a sense of guilt. All that is now gone, but he still remembers it. He still feels that pull that irrevocably draws him into Lan Zhan’s orbit.

Lan Zhan is the best thing that he ever fucked up.

“Lan Zhan,” he says, and he has to lower his gaze to the floor, because this is too shameless even for him. “Please.”

“Wei Ying,” Lan Zhan replies. And then, “I will do it.”

Wei Ying’s looks up in surprise. Lan Zhan’s expression hasn’t changed, and he’s still looking at Wei Ying with an inscrutable look on his face.

“Really?” Wei Ying asks, dumbfounded. If it was him, he would probably rub his denial in his ex’s face and laugh about it.

But Lan Zhan has never been like that, has he?

“Yes,” Lan Zhan answers.

“Lan Zhan, you are a lifesaver!” Wei Ying exclaims. “How could I ever thank you? Man, I owe you a huge favour. I’ll text you all the details, ok? And I’ll pick you up, obviously. And uh… I’ll try to be as un-annoying a boyfriend as I can possibly be. Don’t want you to regret associating with me again.”

“That will not be a problem, Wei Ying.”

Wei Ying can’t quite believe that, has probably been a problem for Lan Zhan even before they started dating, but he’ll take Lan Zhan’s word for it.

“Okay, so the entire thing starts at eleven, is that okay for you? I’ll come and pick you up around ten.”

“That is fine. I will be ready.”

They look at each other for one long, silent moment.

“Thank you, Lan Zhan, really,” Wei Ying finally breathes, and tries not to think about how much he wants to kiss Lan Zhan.

How deluded did he have to be to ever have believed that he would get over Lan Zhan at some point? He will never be over Lan Zhan. He will be ninety and in a care home and someone will say something about young love, and he will get teary-eyed and start talking about that young man that he used to love when he was just a kid. That his heart was broken, and he could never love again. Not in the way he loved Lan Zhan. Never like he loved Lan Zhan.

“I will wait for your message,” Lan Zhan says, and it’s a clear dismissal.

That’s fine, that’s fine. Wei Ying needs to go home, lick his wounds, and prepare his heart for Sunday, anyway. He might have to touch Lan Zhan, and he can only hope he won’t abandon all decorum if he does. He has no idea how he’s supposed to survive that.

“Thanks,” he says and gives Lan Zhan his best confident smile. “I’m looking forward to it.”

“Until Sunday, then,” Lan Zhan says, and then he gives Wei Ying a short dismissive nod and closes the door silently.

“Until Sunday,” Wei Ying whispers at the closed door, and turns away.

Once Wei Ying is out of Lan Zhan’s apartment block, he finally allows himself to breathe again. His heart is still racing, and he still can’t quite believe it.

He did it. He asked Lan Zhan to come with him, and Lan Zhan agreed. Granny Yu’s heart will not be broken. Not because of Wei Ying and his messy private live, in any case. Now he only has to make sure that he manages to spend several hours in Lan Zhan’s proximity without embarrassing himself or anyone else. That he doesn’t start begging Lan Zhan to take him back in front of his gossipy cousins.

That one might be hard.

[the-ashen-gm]

30 Day Worldbuilding Challenge #9: Cosmology

What is the Cosmology of your world?

This is one that I’m quite excited to talk about! This will be a long post, so I’ll put a break in to make it less overwhelming on your dash.

First off, I will say that I really don’t like the Forgotten Realms’ alignment-centric model. This is important, because when I first started DMing games in Groppa I actually used this cosmology. Here it is, for reference:

[Image ID: The Great Wheel of the Forgotten Realms. It is a golden disc with many cocentric circles spinning within. Each circle is a different plane, with the Material Plane in the middle. End ID.]

I don’t like this model because 1. there are too many planes and 2. it doesn’t tell me anything interesting about the world and its conflicts. That’s fine because FR is meant to be a generic world for everyone to play with, but it does not suit me. Plus, most of these planes are kind of redundant. Do I really need Hades (the plane of infinite gloom) AND the Shadowfell (the plane of infinite gloom)? A lot of the Lower Planes could just be layers of the Abyss IMO. If you’re going for an alignment thing, do we really need planes for the in-betweens of alignment? Do we need a Lawful Evil, Lawful Evilish, and Lawfulish Evil plane? I say no, we don’t. All this complication is facilitating a very boring Good vs Evil struggle that I don’t care for.

So, without further ado, here is my cosmology (I’m not going to say it’s better, just that it suits me more). It is split into two parts, each of which being a different “view” of the same cosmos. We’ll start with the mortal-centric view, the one that puts the Waking World in the centre:

Part 1: The Wheel of Dreamers

[Image ID: A multicoloured wheel hanging in space. The outer ring goes from green, to blue, to orange, to red, with the words “Plane of Air”, “Plane of Water”, “Plane of Earth” and “Plane of Fire”. Then there is a yellow ring labelled “Limbo” and within that is a green and black yin-yang shape. The green part is labelled “Feywild” and the black “Shadowfell”. Between those two are icons of the sun and two moons. In the middle of all of that is an icon that looks like a green and blue planet. End ID.]

This part is not terribly different to the Forgotten Realms version, aside from the fact that Limbo is now an elemental plane. To sum it up briefly, the point of this cosmology is that the dreams, thoughts, and emotions of mortals (dreamers) is what creates the rest of the wheel. Emotions and dreams create the Feywild and Shadowfell, both planes that mirror the Waking World in the middle but with a higher emphasis on abstractions like mood, tone, and myth. If you have a home in the Waking World, it is sure to be a building packed with memories and associations for you - some good, some bad. But in the Feywild, all your most explosive and hard-hitting memories will be represented literally; for example, that time you had a great birthday party at home will be represented by a family of sprites who spend all their time feasting on a windowsill. Equally, that time you had a flaming row with your spouse will be represented by a burning tree that never goes out. Meanwhile, in the Shadowfell all your cooler associations come to life. All the hours you spent quietly reading or drawing will be represented by ghostly spirits who act out those quiet activities, and every moment of boredom or misery you felt there will echo through the warped hallways as an audible song. 

To sum up, the Feywild takes all the big emotions and makes them literal, and the Shadowfell takes all the long emotions and makes them literal. The thing they have in common is that they’re for processing complex, abstract feelings. This is totally unlike the Elemental Planes. After the soul-stuff that the dreams that made the Shadowfell and Feywild have been processed, they move through Limbo were they are further broken down into something formless and impersonal. Then they are sorted into raw components: Air, Water, Earth, and Fire. These are the building blocks of the multiverse, and exactly what the gods need to continue with their grand project.

That is the purpose of the Wheel. The gods themselves get soul-stuff energy directly from their followers, but that alone is not enough. The Wheel spins and generates more energy for them to use in concert with each other. A god can just about live off the prayers and devotion of their followers, but to keep the multiverse intact they need far more. This brings us to the god-centric view of the multiverse: The Axle upon which the Wheel spins.

Part 2: The Axle of the Gods

[IMAGE ID: A side view of the previous image, with the Wheel of Dreamers represented by a thin line in the middle. Above and below are two iscolose triangles, each with their short edge parallel to the line in the middle. The top triangle is grey, pointing up, and labelled “Mechanus”. The bottom triangle is red, pointing down, and labelled “Hell”. Hell is pointing at another thin line that is barely wider than it is, labelled “Hades”. Below that is a black vortex labelled “The Abyss”. In the background is a purple nebula labelled “The Astral Sea”. End ID.]

The Astral Sea is the home of most gods. Every star you see is its own little world, with gods and other celestial beings living there in eternal luxury. There are plenty of mortals there too, many of whom are essentially either planar travellers (read: pirates) or the exalted followers of the gods. I left the Astral Sea vague because it allows me to come up with any wacky idea for a plane I like and just have it be one of the many realms of the Astral Sea. 

Above the Wheel of Dreamers is Mechanus, (pronounced meck-ah-nuss, not meck-ay-nuss) the home of Primus the god of balance. They used to be a fairly minor god until the Abyss showed up, at which point they were forced to reorganise existence into fighting against it. They placed Mechanus in its current position to oversee reality. Then, they moulded Hell out of the broken planes that had been ravaged by the demons thus far. Placing the disgraced angel Asmodeus in charge of building an infernal army to fight the Abyss, finally Primus contracted Hades and Dread Persephone to position the plane of Hades as the battleground for the war between devils and demons. Thus reality was safeguarded against demonic incursion. The Blood War, as it came to be known, would rage forever. No matter how hard Asmodeus tried to win, Hades and Persephone would subtly alter the course of the war to keep him on the back foot. It’s a dangerous game they’re playing. Go too far in sabotaging Asmodeus and the demons will overrun reality. Let Asmodeus’ tactical brilliance be rewarded and he might conquer the Abyss, thus gaining its infinite power (power enough to overthrow the gods). 

Conclusion

So yeah, it’s not terribly different to the Forgotten Realms’ cosmology. The reason I changed it was two-fold: one, I wanted to make it not all about alignment. Two, I wanted to put the Blood War in as the central conflict of the multiverse. I like the idea of Asmodeus being an ambiguous figure who is both genuinely trying to make up for his past mistakes but is also rightfully angry at his mistreatment by the callous gods. I wanted the struggle between the Abyss and the rest of reality to not be about Good vs Evil but more about this specific “family” of gods trying to defend themselves. I took a lot of inspiration from Greek myth, as you might guess by Hades’ importance to the cosmology. I’m really into the idea of running more “planar” games where you get to go really wild with the environments you can use; central to that goal was creating a cosmology that I could vibe with.

[thecleverdame]

Control and Release - 13

Series Masterlist

TEDTalk!Sam x Reader

Summary: With the rest of the staff caught in a snowstorm, you find yourself acting as a personal assistant to the notorious Sam Winchester.

Warnings: Dom/Sub, humiliation, embarrassment, sexual objectification,  mutual masturbation, spanking, cum play, fingering, anal play, orgasm control, dub-con, nipple clamps, breath play (more warnings as the story continues)  

Words: 4.3k

Beta: @ilikaicalie

Parts 14, 15 & 16 are currently available on Patreon for a monthly pledge of $2.50. This includes early access to all my stories and Patreon exclusive content.  >> CLICK HERE <<

-

Dean. The look in his eyes will forever be seared into your brain.

“We should call the police,” you panic, starting toward the bedroom for your cell phone.

“Y/N, stop.” Sam catches you by the arm. “No police.”

“But Sam!” You look around wildly, half expecting Dean to pop back around the corner. “What if he comes back? We have to tell someone-”

“No,” he barks, sitting you on a stool at the counter.

He disappears for a moment, returning with one of his sweatshirts and hands it to you, silent as you pull it over your head.

“I need you to make a promise to me, here and now, that you will never tell anyone Dean was here.” His face is gravely serious, standing in front of you like a father scolding a child.

“But-”

“No caveats. This is non-negotiable. You will never tell another living soul about this. Understood?”

“I-” you sputter, trying to make sense of this. Why would he ever want to protect a person that’s done such heinous things? In the end it’s the submissive part of you that answers on autopilot. “I understand.”

“Jesus Christ!” Sam explodes with anger, his fist connecting with the door of the refrigerator. He punches it three times in rapid succession, clutching bloody knuckles looking in horror between him and the dents in the stainless steel. “I can’t fucking believe he showed up.”

“You hurt yourself.” You start to get up but he takes a step back, lip curling as he glares at you.

“Stay where you are.” He’s vibrating with anger, this is a side of him you haven’t witnessed before. He’s normally controlled to a fault, but there’s no containing this outburst.  

You draw in a breath, sitting back on the stool, watching him seethe. He yanks open a drawer and wraps a hand towel around his knuckles.

“If you ever see Dean again, if he tries to contact you, you come directly to me. Tell me immediately.”

“What does he want with me?” There’s fear rising in your chest. You’ve read about the things that he’s done, sick, twisted acts, some of which are utterly unspeakable. “You’re scaring me.”

Your voice cracks and it seems to jog him out his blistering fury and his face goes even, that self control slipping back into place.

“There’s no reason to be scared. He won’t hurt you, but if Dean came here after all this time it means he’s serious. He’ll come back. If I were him, I’d use you to get to me. The Winchesters are persistent above all else.”

“How can you say he won’t hurt me?” You’re still in shock, searching his face for some kind of understanding. “After all the things he’s done...”

“I’m going to have to ask you to take a giant leap of faith and just trust me when I say that there are things about Dean, about my family and my past, that aren’t what they appear to be. Dean is a son of a bitch but he hasn’t done half the things they say he has.”

“How do you know? How can you be sure?”

“I just do. I know my brother, he’s changed but not that much.”

You gulp, trying to wrap your head around all this information. There’s a wet sensation on your knee and you look down to find a drop of blood, dripping from the soaked cloth around his fist.

“You should go to the hospital, you might have broken something.”

“I’ll survive.” He winces, taking off the rag to inspect his bloody knuckles.

“I’ll do what you asked, but I don’t understand,” you insist. “I need you to explain to me how it’s possible he’s on the FBI’s most wanted list and you’re saying he’s basically harmless.”

“I’m not saying Dean’s harmless, he’s far from it. He’s lethal, it’s the way my dad raised us. But he’s more of a...vigilante than a killer. He and my dad are into some dark stuff, occult bullshit. I separated myself from that world a long time ago. It’s just a bunch of wack-a-doo superstition. ”

“You’re sure he won’t hurt me?” you press, coming down from the adrenaline of the situation.

“If I thought you were in harm’s way I’d call the police now and have him arrested. If I thought he’d hurt anyone who didn’t deserve it, I’d turn him in.” He looks at you, mouth tight. Whatever he’s thinking about he doesn’t let on as he stares to you. He grunts, eyes fluttering closed as he flexes his wrist. “I am going to need to see a doctor.”

“Do you want me to drive you?”

“No. That’s why I have a driver.” He shakes his head. “You may stay here or go home, whatever makes you feel safer while I’m gone.”

“Would you prefer if I left? I mean after everything-”

“I would prefer that life moves on despite my brother. I expect you to be here tonight. I have plans for you, and you don’t want to disappoint me do you?”

His eyes narrow, looking at your bare legs and you almost forget how to breathe.

“Never,” you confirm. “Never.”

-

As the days pass the looming threat of all things Dean fades. For the first couple of days you were sure he was going to appear around every corner, but life goes on and the most wantedWinchester is nowhere to be found. But he’s always in the back of your mind, the way he looked at you, the coldness in his eyes. In Sam’s own words his brother is lethal, a description that’s less than comforting.

But the fact is you trust Sam. You trust him with sex and you trust that when he tells you that you’re safe, you are in fact, just that.

Three Weeks Later

Sam has been in Japan for almost two weeks but it feels more like two years. You’d fallen into a comfortable routine and it’s strange to go more than a week without being in the same room with him.

Your phone vibrates at eleven o’clock sharp, signaling Sam’s incoming video call. You swipe to answer, glancing up to ensure the living room curtains are shut. The last thing you need is one of your neighbors watching you masturbate on command.

“Hi,” you smile as his pixelated face appears on the screen.

“Hello,” he replies, distracted by whatever he’s looking at. His face becomes clear as the connection strengthens. This is his lunch break which inevitably means time will be limited. His eyes snap between something he’s reading and your image on the screen. “Set your phone up so I can see your entire body.”

“Okay,” you respond, getting up to prop your phone on a stack of books in the middle of the coffee table. This is not the first night you’ve been in this position and you’ve perfected the setup. You take a seat on the couch, making sure you’re in the frame as he glances up.

“Take your clothes off. Everything.” He forgoes whatever else has his interest, focusing solely on you, watching stoically as you strip down, shimmying out of your panties then letting your bra fall to the floor.

There’s a faint knock coming from his end and he instantly looks annoyed, looking up as he calls to whoever it is. “Come in.”

“I don’t want to bother you during lunch Mr. Winchester,” Lexi’s voice is immediately recognizable in the background. You lean closer to the phone, listening carefully. “I just wanted to pop in and make sure you have everything you need.”

You know that tone, playfully and airy. It’s the same one she uses at the bar when she’s trying to hook up with some junior associate. She’s flirting with Sam Winchester. You assumed that no one would have the balls to approach him but you’ve clearly underestimated her.

“I do,” Sam stares at her with his trademark uncomfortable, unwavering stare you’ve been on the receiving end of from time to time. “Have everything I need.”

There’s silence. She’s obviously still there because he hasn’t turned his attention back you.

“You can go.” He watches off the screen and you wait until you hear the faint click of a door and he turns back to his phone.

“What is she doing-” you start but Sam is already moving on.

“She isn’t your concern.” He chastises you immediately, bringing on all the familiar feelings of subjugation that never fail to turn you on despite your own shame. “Open your legs and touch yourself. Make sure I can see your cunt.”

You lean back on the couch spreading your legs wide. One finger slides into your mouth, parting your lips just enough to flick your tongue against it. Then you run your fingertips lightly down your body, over your breasts.

Sam shifts, clearing his throat as he settles in to watch you. You wonder if he’s touching himself, stroking his own cock or is he just directing and watching? One never knows with him.

“Are you wet?” he asks firmly.

You continue to move your hand down across your belly, over your mound and slipping one finger between your folds, breath catching in your throat.

“Yes,” you nod, feeling your own slick.

“Did you masturbate this morning like I told you to?” he inquires like a teacher ready to reprimand a petulant child.

“Yes,” you confirm with a whimper, slowly dipping a finger between warm flesh.

“Good. We’re going to try something different. Get the oil out of the box and oil yourself up.”

Sam presented you with a box of special toys before he left on his business trip and the two of you have been working your way through all the contents.

You find the bottle of massage oil and pour it into your hands, rubbing it over your arms and neck, then running your hands down the sides of your breasts. You lift one leg onto the coffee table giving the camera a better view of your pussy and you work on one leg. Then repeat the process, stroking and caressing your inner thighs. When you are done you sit back, presenting your now glistening body for his inspection.  

“Very nice,” his eyes fall from your tits to your pussy, tongue darting out. “Grab your breasts.”

You slide both hands over your breasts, feeling your nipples harden with a soft moan of anticipation.

“Not that like,” he snaps, shaking his head and your eyes shoot up, hands falling to your sides. If there’s one thing you truly hate, it’s his disappointment. It’s not often that he corrects you so severely but being relegated to only video chat has been testing his patience. “Listen to me. From now on your hands are my hands. When I tell you to touch yourself, I want you to picture my hands doing the touching, do you understand?”

“Yes,” you nod, sitting still, legs spread.

“Put more oil in your hands,” he instructs, leaning closer to his screen.

You comply, picking up the oil and spreading it over your palms.

“Now,” his head tilts, jaw tightening. “Pinch your nipples hard. Your hands are my hands and tonight I’m going to be rough. You know the way I touch you. Do it.”

You squeeze your nipples, twisting them harder than you intend to. A cry escapes your lips as you feel yourself sliding into that place where you turn yourself over to him. Your hands continue to pinch harder and harder, biting down on your nipple the way he would until you cry out again.

“Harder” he encourages.

You pull, feeling the stretch and gripping as hard as you can, gasping in pain that shoots from your tits to your pussy and becomes instant arousal, your clit aching between your thighs.

“Good girl. Spread your legs wider, keep pulling on your nipples with one hand. With the other, shove your fingers into your cunt.”

Hooking one leg over the arm of the couch you lean back, offering him an unobstructed view. Giving your breast a sharp tug you slide a hand between your thighs, two fingers sliding into your slick, deep and fast just like when he fingers you. It feels almost as if he is the one touching you as you fuck yourself rough and quick. The familiar wet sound of your pussy taking your fingers fills the room as you close your eyes and lay your head back, the world shrinking away while you imagine Sam touching you, tugging and pulling, fucking you hard and deep. A series of short, sharp cries leave your mouth as the hot flush of an orgasm begins to build.

“Can I cum?” you ask, already knowing the answer.

“Absolutely not,” he quips.

Mustering every last ounce of self-control you pull your hand away, whimpering when your fingers leave your body. You’re quivering, shaking with need. It’s been nine days since he let you cum and you’re practically vibrating with need. To be fair he gave you a warning. No orgasm’s until he returns from Japan, you’re not allowed to cum without his fingers or his cock in you, no exceptions.  

“We’re going to try again. Spread your pussy open and pour the oil over your cunt.”

Your fingers slide back between your legs, spreading your lips open. You pick up the oil and pour it slowly in a thin stream over your folds. The sensation of the cool oil dripping over your exposed clit and between your legs makes you shiver.

“This time fuck yourself with three fingers.”

Running your fingers over your sex, the other hand finds your breast again, clamping down painfully hard on one nipple as you slide three fingers inside your cunt. You gasp, rocking your hips against your hand, driving deeper just like he does.

“Spread your pussy open and angle your hips toward the camera. Let me see you.”

You inch forward, pushing your fingers deeper still and scissoring them open, forcing yourself open for his viewing pleasure. There’s an incredible feeling of vulnerability, exposed and humiliated as you hold yourself open for him to watch you.

“Your pussy is begging for it, but I think you’re missing something else. Get the vibrator out of the bag and then lube it up. Make sure you cover the whole thing.”

“You want me to…” you trail off, sitting up to stare at him. He’s close to his phone, his face is the only thing visible.

“You know exactly what I want you to do.”

He’s been fixated on one specific torment this entire trip.

Your hands are nearly shaking as you reach for the box, withdrawing a rather powerful vibrator roughly twice the width of his thumb. You lube up the wand squeezing a thick ribbon of jelly along the hard plastic, all the while feeling the oil already slick between your thighs.

“You know what to do.” He cocks an eyebrow as if he’s expecting you to protest.

Feeling the heat in your cheeks you spread your legs again, pressing the blunt end of the vibrator against the tight ring of muscle between your butt cheeks. There is nothing that brings more shame or more arousal than this.

“Good girl. All at once. You’re going to tell me how much you want it up your ass when you push it in.”

You shudder in complete embarrassment. He knows exactly what this does to you. It’s degrading and exhilarating all at the same time. You’re ashamed to admit that you enjoy it.  “But-”

“Do it. Say it loud. Push it in. Right now,” he grits out.

You take a deep breath, then in one smooth motion slide the vibrator into your ass as far you can. “I want it so bad, so deep like this...oh fuck.”

Before you have a chance to adjust he continues. “Turn it on.”

“I can’t,” you whimper, squirming as you hold your legs open.

“Why?” He tilts his head, eyes narrowing at your refusal.

“I’ll cum,” you admit.

“Turn it on. And don’t you dare cum without permission. If I have to tell you again you’re not going like what happens when I see you in person.”

The vibrator is one of your favorite toys, but it’s a source of torment as well. He knows full well it makes it nearly impossible to not cum and he’s become fond of using it on you, refusing to allow you to orgasm while making you masturbate with it both anally and vaginally.

Reaching between your legs you turn the small knob at the base and it comes to life, sending shock waves of pleasure through your body.

“Oh, oh, oh,” you pant, eyes closing as you writhe and wiggle.

“Does it feel good?” He loves to make you admit how much you enjoy these depraved acts.

“Yes,” you moan, hands rubbing down the tops of your thighs, trying to hold on to what little control you have left. Your orgasm is building, it wouldn't take much and if he makes you touch yourself again there will be no holding back.

But instead, he does something equally cruel.

“I think that’s enough for now,” he explains flippantly as if he’s already moved on to something else. “Turn it off and clean yourself up. I’ll see you tomorrow, same time.”

The screen goes blank when he hangs up leaving you on the edge of pleasure and desperation.

-

Three days later you’re locked in a windowless conference room, waiting for Sam’s call. He’s an hour late, which is unheard of. It’s 11 am your time which means it’s midnight there.

Staring at the screen you watch the minutes tick by, trying to make a decision. What if he forgot? That’s unlikely. Sam doesn't forget anything. Maybe he fell asleep?

He’s flying home tomorrow, it’s possible he just lost track of time in preparation. Your thumb hovers over the call button, tapping it as Keith’s name appears on the screen.

After exactly three rings the line picks up, the screen fumbles for a second and Lexi’s face appears. She looks just as surprised to see you as you are her. Your mind races, it’s late and she has his phone.

Pepper doesn’t even touch his phone.

“Hey, umm,” you stumble trying to think of a cover. “Did I dial the wrong number?”

“No!” She smiles wide. “That’s so weird, your name came up as Hester something or other. His phone must be messed up.”

You nearly choke, realizing Sam’s reference to the Scarlet Letter and thankful that Lexi isn’t more well read.

“Yeah, that’s so weird. Why do you have his phone? It’s super late there isn’t it?”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” she chatters on. “I was...oh, you have a call,” she looks off-screen. “I answered it for you I hope you don’t-’

Sam’s face is immediately on camera, looking at you like he’s ready to murder someone. “I’ll see you when I’m back in the office.”

Two Days Later

“Hi,” Lexi drapes herself over cubicle wall of your desk. “I am so glad to be home.”

You haven’t spoken to Sam since that night when she answered his phone. While you understand he doesn’t always have time to give you his full attention you’re still uncomfortable with the circumstances and eager to see him again. Lexi is the last thing you need right now.

“Well,” you swallow your feelings, it’s not her fault after all. She doesn’t know she’s encroaching into your territory. “Welcome home. You didn’t like Tokyo?”

“Oh you know. Pepper is a bitch even when she thinks she’s being nice and the food was disgusting…” Her finger trails along the edge of your desk, biting her lip as she looks up at you, almost vibrating with whatever she wants to tell you. “But other things weren’t so bad.”

“Oh?” You turn back to your screen, unable to look at her.

“You’re going to think I’m crazy and you have to promise me that you’re not going to tell anyone.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t tell me then? If it’s supposed to be a secret.”

“You’re no fun….I have to tell someone,” she whines, pulling a chair over and inching right up into your personal space. “This is so wild, but Sam and I got sort of...close during the trip.”

Every inch of your body goes hot, instant adrenaline pumping in your veins.

“What exactly do you mean by close?” you inquire, folding your hands together in your lap.

“You know how it goes, one thing leads to another. Late nights in hotel rooms, he practically asked me to stay the night with him. I know everyone thinks he’s a hardass but under all that he’s just a man. He’s kind of handsome, don’t you think?”

“I haven’t given it much thought.” You clear your throat. “Sorry, I have to pee.”

Before Lexi has the chance to say another word you’re up and out of your seat, locking yourself in the nearest bathroom feeling a combination of anger and nausea.

You’re shocked by your own reaction. If you’re honest with yourself there have been certain feelings creeping in, it’s unavoidable when you spend as much time with someone as you have with Sam. You tell yourself you’d feel the same way if he was just a friend. He’s always been crystal clear about what you are to him, and you’ve used that division to keep a deeper attachment from forming, or so you thought. But the idea of Sam and Lexi of all people is bringing emotions to the surface you’re not at all ready to deal with.

You know she was in his room. She answered his phone, looking less than professional and he chose not to offer any explanation. Is it possible? Would he fuck her? Why not? You have no power to enforce your contract, it’s for his safety, not yours. Being reminded that you were forced to sign a piece of paper, to agree to his terms brings your anger and frustration to a head.

And the things he’s had you do while he’s been gone, you’ve acted like a whore performing for him, complying with every request with enthusiasm, only to have Lexi talk about how close they’ve gotten.

Wiping a tear from your eye, you pull out your phone.

Y/N: I need to talk to you.

You send off the message instantly filled with regret. You’re upset, you should wait until you’ve got your emotions under control. Taking a series of deep breaths you look at yourself in the mirror, staring at rosy cheeks and wild eyes.

You phone dings twice.

Keith Campbell: I’m busy today.

Keith Campbell: Is it important?

You stare down at the phone, mouth twisting as you debate your response.

Y/N: Yes.

There’s almost no delay before his answer pops up.

Keith Campbell: Come to my office now.

After smoothing back your hair you take a final breath and head toward the elevators. Pepper doesn’t even look up as you pass her desk. Instead, she mumbles something about Sam warning her you were headed up and waves you inside.

Sam’s at his desk, focused on his laptop. He glances up for split second, looking rather unhappy with your interruption. “Make it quick.”

“Don’t talk to me like that,” you snap, surprising yourself as much as him. His eyebrows shoot up, all attention focusing on you as he stands up slowly, clearly not in the mood for a challenge.

“Excuse me?” He walks around his desk, mouth twisting in displeasure.

“Did you fuck Lexi?” You just put it out there. On the way up to his office you went over and over it in your brain, you had a whole speech prepared about expectations and trust but now as you stand in front of him it just tumbles right out.

For a split second he looks genuinely perplexed, then his grave expression turns into amusement as he crosses his arms over his chest, examining you.

“Why are you asking?” His question is calm but leaves no room for debate.

“Because she was in your room, she answered your phone...and she just told me…” As you say the words you’re already realizing you don’t really believe it yourself. Sam and Lexi; it’s ridiculous. Closing your eyes you shake your head in embarrassment. “I’m overreacting, aren’t I? Lexi exaggerates everything.”

“Yes, she does.” Sam nods, his eyes falling down your body. It’s been fifteen days since you’ve been in the same room and there’s no doubt he feels the same arousal at your physical proximity. “That not to say that she didn’t try. Your friend put me in a series of incredibly inappropriate situations that I don’t wish to relive, especially with you. She won’t be working for me again.”

“Good.” You look at the floor, pressing your lips together. “To be clear, Lexi isn’t my friend.”

“I don’t care about semantics.” He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose as if this conversation is really taking a toll on him. “Now, if you don’t have any other burning questions, you need to leave because I need to focus. I have a week’s worth of reports to review and you are the ultimate distraction.”

“Oh, o-okay,” you sputter, both offended and flattered. “Sorry for bothering you, I was just, I...I’ve just got a lot of pent up frustration and then she said what she said and I…”

“Got jealous?” One eyebrow shoots up and you’d swear there’s a pull at the corner of his mouth. A ghost of a smirk.

“A little,” you confess.

“Go,” he waves a hand, walking back around his desk. “Come over tonight. I’ll send a car for you around nine and we’ll take care of your frustrations.”

“But it’s Thursday?” You hesitate, unprepared for the last minute surprise.

“I’m aware,” he stares you at again. “I’ll see you tonight.”

-

Parts 14, 15 & 16 are currently available on Patreon for a monthly pledge of $2.50. This includes early access to all my stories and Patreon exclusive content.  >> CLICK HERE <<

[starshipsofstarlord]

Earth Man - Adam Strange x Reader

Kem had told you about Seg’s new ‘friend’. He was apparently Strange, that was the word he used, you thought. And to top it all off, he was not Kryptonian, You had never met anyone that did not come from your home planet, and you were excited to say the least.

“Can you please calm down (N/N)?” Seg sighed, already used to your bubbly nature, but aware that it would draw attention.

“I’m sorry, I’ve just never met an alien before.” You whispered apologetically, looking around, making sure you didn’t blow the time traveller's cover. It felt like hours following Seg, he was far too slow and cautious, checking every corner thoroughly on your way to the bar.

“Is it ugly?” You asked, having associated that description with foreign creatures. Krypton was not supposed to believe in other life forms, but you, like Seg and his grandfather, did.

“Yes.” He absentmindedly answered, not telling the entire truth. The man found the other off putting, all he spoke about was the end of his world.

The El heir opened the bar door, allowing you to enter first, scoping out behind the both of you before also entering. There wasn’t a mass of customers in the bar, they weren’t your priority anyway. To you, it felt like you were going on a fieldtrip in your own district.

You didn’t stop, you walked straight towards where Kem stood, almost hitting your knees on the bar. That definitely would have hurt. “Where is it?”

Kem seemed unbothered, he was scrubbing the inside of a jug with a bored expression. How was he not freaking out?

“He’s in the back.” The bar tender was speaking directly to Seg, although he didn’t ignore the glimmer in your eyes. No more words were exchanged, you and Seg headed for the private part of the bar.

“Finally, you’re back!” It’s, or his as what Kem gendered him to be, exclaimed. There was an unusual accent slipping off his tongue, one that you had most definitely hadn’t thought existed.

And then you saw the alien. He looked Kryptonian, aside from the dressing of his voice and the peculiar clothes he wore. There was even a funny thing on his head.

“You said he was ugly.” His appearance surprised you, you may have even found him attractive if he wasn’t a lifeform from elsewhere.

“I wasn’t really listening to you.” Shrugged Seg. smirking at your confusion. The Earth man glanced between the pair of you, focusing mostly on you. You guessed it was because he didn’t know you.

“I’d take offense if we weren’t in such a rush.” Spoke the alien once more, smiling briefly at you. It made a stutter whirl in your stomach. Is that what humans could do, pull at your guts with no contact?

“Oh yeah, the whole save the world stuff.” Seg muttered. He took a hold of your arm, pulling you closer to the newcomer. “This is Adam, Adam this is (Y/N).”

“Hi.” Adam extended his hand, for what reason you did not know. You just looked at it with a tilt of your head.

“She’s the tech genius I told you about. She can get us wherever you need us to go.” The praise gave you, even if it was not completely direct, made you feel proud. It was true, you were.

“Great. So we can get started?” There was so much light and hope in his eyes, something that contrasted with the worry in his brow hairs and the timid-ness of his jaw

“Hold your blaster there Earth man. If you want my help, you’re going to have to explain this whole thing. Don’t leave out any details.” You were sure you’d grow fond of him.

The entire ride had been successful. Brainiac had been stopped, but at what cost? Seg was gone, you had no one. A hand nudged your shoulder, the owner obviously aware of how fragile you currently were.

“Are you going to be okay, here I mean?” It was Adam. You had almost lost Seg by defending the Earth man, but to this second you did not regret it at all. Even if you had lost Seg in the end.

“He was my friend. The best one I had.” For some strange reason, you felt like Adam could understand you, no matter what you were saying.

“That wasn’t an answer.” He wanted you to be honest. Honesty wasn’t your best feature as a hacker.

“I will be, in time.” You weren’t sure how you would recover from losing a friend, especially the one that had drifted into the phantom zone.

“Come with me.” He held his hand out, and you gratefully took it. 

“It would be interesting to see where an alien lives...”

A/N ; I'm aware this is a bit different from the show. I just wanted to write this for some reason.

[monsterkinkmeme]

FAQ & Rules

Hello! Welcome to Monster Kink Meme!

This blog is a source for writing and art prompts for monsters & kinks. Pretty straightforward. Here’s a basic FAQ, mixed with our rules.

What is the point of this blog?

This blog is to generate writing and art prompts, similar to @write-it-motherfuckers and @writing-prompt-s, specifically for exophilia writers and artists.

Can we submit prompts?

Yes! Please do, either through the submission button or through asks. Asks are best for short prompts, or things that you want to keep anonymous. Submissions are best for longer prompts, and cannot be anonymous. We love getting prompts from folks. If you have a request for a story, please phrase it as a prompt. We aren’t a request blog, but a prompt blog. 

Who can participate?

Anyone over the age of 18.

How can we participate?

Other than submitting prompts, if you see a prompt that inspires you, write or draw something and reblog it with the original prompt. Also, tag liberally.

Art submitted cannot be anonymous and must be from either the artist who created it or posted with permission from the artist who created it. Do not repost someone else’s art without their permission. This includes using it in moodboards (those collages at the top of stories.) 

I see you suggest genders/monsters. Do I need to use those?

Mod prompts will sometimes have suggested genders & monsters. Those are totally optional and can be ignored if something else inspires you.

Submitted prompts that include requested monsters or genders should be considered mandatory, since people submitting those are setting up specific situations they’d hope to see.

Do I need to use a specific tense or point of view? [x]

No! The exophilia community does a lot of writing from second person present tense as a stylistic thing, but that doesn’t mean you should limit yourself to that. Write what feels comfortable to you. If that’s third person, write that! If it’s past tense, then that’s fine, too!

Can I write about sexy stuff? Kinky stuff? Polyamory?

Yes! We leave our prompts open, but if something you write takes a sexy turn, or features extra kinks, or multiple partners, that’s totally fine by us. (As long as it abides by the rules below re: what we don’t allow.) We love that stuff, it’s just that a lot of what we’ve gotten so far has been sweet rather than spicy.

Just make sure you TAG APPROPRIATELY. Use the citrus scale, tag for content (anything that people may want to know about before choosing to read your story), and follow the content rules. (We want consent, no incest, no underage sex, and no bestiality. Beyond that, it’s fair game.)

Where do I find monster inspiration?

We’ve got a post here. The short version? Everywhere! Pop culture. Cryptids. Mythology. Dungeons & Dragons. Video Games. Movies. Your Imagination.

I need writing help. Do you have advice?

We have a post here. It’s got advice from a bunch of us about how to start, how to continue. How to do the thing. The biggest thing is just to go for it. You’ll never get better without doing.

If a prompt has already been “filled,” can someone else write about the same prompt with a different story?

Yep! We’d love to see as many iterations as you guys can think of! (Someone asked Aelia about it, there’s a post.)

Are there any format expectations/requirements for stories?

Generally we like to see something that lists Characters, Content, and Rating, and a Read More link when appropriate. 

Characters tells people who/what is in your story. Reader & monster genders would be listed here. 

Content would be where you put any tags (see the next question) and warn people about anything that may squick or trigger, as well as any acts or situations that they may be interested in, or which they may wish to avoid. This allows people to make good choices for themselves. 

Rating is based on our Citrus Scale. 

If your story is more than about 6 paragraphs, or it’s explicit or potentially triggering, we love to see you use a Read More/Keep Reading tag  after the first paragraph or two so when we reblog it people don’t have to scroll forever.

How should I tag?

There’s two spots we love to see tags!

1: Ahead of your story. If you put tags before your story, your readers can make informed choices about what you’ve written, and whether it’s a good/safe choice for them. This is where we want to see tags about any kinks, sex acts, or content warnings for readers.

2: In the tumblr tags. This is where you put things to make your story searchable, so DO NOT put NSFW or “sexual” tags here, as it will make the post inaccessible by searching. This is where all the tags about citrus scale, monster types, reader & monster genders, pairings, and fandoms that apply should go. Here’s a post about unsearchable tags. Using these tags will make your post “disappear” and we’d hate to see that happen.

We have a handy guide to how we want to see the citrus scale used for stories that people hope to see on our blog.

Overall, USE CONTENT WARNINGS. We cannot stress this enough. We want readers to be able to make informed choices about what they read to avoid “squicks” and triggers.

Should we use the “teratophilia” tag?

We would prefer you didn’t for two reasons: A: teratophilia is no longer a searchable tag, and B: given the original definition of the word (sexual attraction to deformed, disfigured, or monstrous people and a form of paraphilia, I.E. attraction to the disabled), the moderators of this blog feel it is both inaccurate and insensitive.

Most (not all, but most) monster-lover writers now use the much more accurate term exophilia (the love of extraterrestrial, robotic, supernatural, or otherwise non-human life-forms) to describe our work. Robophilia (sexual attraction to robots) and xenophilia (sexual attraction to aliens) is still permissible.

Topics we don’t allow/won’t post/reblog:

Real people (like actors, musicians, and other celebrities)

Incest (including step/adopted family members)

Non-con/dub-con (including rape-play)

Whump (”Hurt/Comfort” fics that focus more on the hurt and less on the comfort. Not to be confused with standard Hurt/Comfort or BDSM)

Bestiality (creatures that don’t possess the mental capacity to consent)

Under-aged/pedophilia (with the minimum age being 18)

Everything else it totally fine.

If you plan on writing anything along these lines using our prompts, please make it a separate post, and do not tag us in it. This is because we want our notes to be relatively safe for people to look through, but also because we don’t want to be associated with things that violate our policies.

We would also like to point out once more that this is a prompt/prompt fill blog, not a request or roleplay blog. If your story/submission does not meet our rules and is NOT a prompt/prompt fill, we will not be posting it on our blog.

Do not plagiarize books/movies/video games for your prompts. 

We’ve seen this cropping up a lot recently. We will not post them if we spot them, and if we miss it and someone points it out, it’ll be deleted. [x]

General Expectation for Respect/Sensitivity

We didn’t want to phrase this one as a question necessarily but we wanted to make it clear that on the whole, not only do all of the mods of this blog embrace the idea of an open community, but we endorse appreciation over appropriation, as well as sensitivity and respect when working with creatures from races and cultures that are not your own, or sexualities, or genders which you do not identify with. We love representation, we just want to see it done well.

Mod Traveler has a post on her blog that sums it up well and includes links to educational resources for people looking for more info, but you should be able to reach out to any of us for more information about what we mean.

What are “theme days”?

We (sometimes) have two theme days a week where we request prompts that fit a specific theme. Prompts that come in on those days which fit those themes get posted immediately instead of getting queued.

Trope Tuesday is all about our favorite tropes with monsters mixed in. First Date Friday is about the trials and tribulations of first dates. We currently do them weekly, but that’s subject to change.

What are tropes?

We’ve had a few questions come in about this! We’ve answered it here, and here. But the short version is; storytelling shorthand. Common “cliche” situations that readers recognize, and may have set expectations for. (”Oh no someone is getting married and I need a date!” etc.) 

I saw you reblog something from [other prompt page]. Why?

So, we reblog from other prompt pages because we are trying to keep enough prompts in the queue to have stuff posting with consistency. We’ve been trying to share relevant prompt posts from other places (with permission from the other blogs, in every case) to ensure there’s enough content.

I wrote a story but you didn’t reblog it!

If it didn’t violate any of our rules, we just might have missed it in the notes, or it wasn’t about monsters. Please feel free to tag us, or message a member of the mod team directly. :)

Will you post a story I submit to you?

Only if it’s a direct response to one of our prompts, and/or it involves monsters. We’re a monster prompt blog. :) 

Do you have a masterlist?

We do! We have one for Fills and one for Prompts.

I don’t like something I saw posted, what do I do?

We can’t control what people post in response to prompts posted here, but we won’t ever reblog something that doesn’t fit the spirit of our blog, and we’ll never post prompts that go against our rules.

With the exception of our explicitly not allowed list, we abide by the “your kink doesn’t have to be my kink, and that’s okay” rule. The tl;dr version of this is “if it doesn’t violate the rules, but you don’t like it, just keep scrolling.”

If you feel it does violate our rules but it slipped through the cracks somehow, please send one of the mods a message, and we will help you out with it.

That’s it! We’ll update as needed! Have fun and get creating!

- Team Kink (AKA: @aelia-likes-monsters, @elizabethtarington, @hufflesmonsters, @monstersandmaw, @cozycryptidcorner, @demonsigh, & @thetravelerwrites)

[sammyspreadyourwings]

U said to talk to u about ur AUs so here I come! Let’s do some more world building yeah? *cracks knuckles* I hope you don’t mind the up-coming long but very incoherent and messy rant about the WITCH!AU because I have MANY thoughts so let’s chat?! :DDD My Halloween loving ass is fucking living right now oh yeah.

World building ??? 👀👀👀

Why did they get rid of my Read Mores on Asks???? Anyway, buckle in y’all long post ahead.

🌠🌠🌠 (01) What if Brian’s presence somehow enhances one’s powers? That’s why he’s always being chased by spirits or other beings and bad witches want him for this and when they can’t have him they want to kill him? (you’d appreciated the extra layer of angst? XD Like do you want me because you truly love me or do you want me because of my Gift that would greatly benefit your own power)

That could potentially be a result because witches that work with spirits because they’re opening up liminal spaces. Not that Brian is aware of it, and is doing it mostly incidentally which is how some nastier spirits get attatched to him and cause some of Brian’s problems.

He does have that moment once or twice, once he figures out how all of this workes.

(02) What hex or spell do you think the witch (or the evil coven? For dramatic movie rivalry effect between sides LOL) cast to kill him? Something related to the hepatitis and ulcer? Disease or other stuffs? (I can’t help but think about the CW TV Series Supernatural witches have so many creative ways of killing someone through hexes, spells and curses)

So I don’t have any names yet, because I am Bad at them. The curse that I currently have in mind is that it’s kind of a paralyzation hex? Like when Brian gets hit with it, it moves more central, so he looses the ability to move and then eventually the ability to speak and eventually breathe.

(03) Imagine how distressed Brian would be because he loves Astronomy and stargazing but during night is always the most dangerous to him? However after meeting the other three they’re always with him (or at least one of them) especially at night? Dragging him out for drinks and all the other fun stuffs that Brian seems to be missing out on. (Freddie will ruffle his hair playfully saying something like you’re safe with us darling we’ll look after you and wink at him but he figures they just want to see him blush so yeah all the usual good old oblivious Brian trope LOL)

Bless oblivious Brian. The insomnia as a kid is what half inspired him to love the stars, because that’s all he’d have to stare at during those long nights. It’s also when those Things He Doesn’t See (his mother’s words) circle around him.

The other three naturally realize what Night means, and how it can affect an untrained Witch especially one that has a Gift like Brian’s. Roger is the one that tends to keep near Brian during the night because he’s simply the best at unnoticable protection charms. And he usually makes a big show of getting into disagreements when he senses that something is Wrong. Because Brian suddenly has a mood drop or John actually feels some kind of spirit (which tend to stay away from him because the dead can’t cross running water).

(04) I imagine the three sometimes turn themselves into animals like cats (witches are so often associated with cats and ravens etc. you know all that) to keep Brian company and to warn off evil beings around him like he’s ours back the fuck off?

Close! They actually use their familiars! Roger’s and Freddie’s are both cats (Roger’s is a maine coon, and Freddie’s is a very sleek looking calico), and Brian usually has to pick them up and put them in the house because “no, kitty, you can’t go to class with me!”

Meanwhile they’re like “dude.”

John’s is usually the one that keeps the best eye on Brian given that it’s a kestrel. She also isn’t fond of Brian because he keeps closing her window! How dare he!

John hasn’t quite managed to convinence her that it’s on accident because Brian doesn’t feel that she’s just not another Bird.

(05) Maybe one night Brian’s having “sleep paralysis” only this time the pressure gets heavier and heavier and help now he can’t breath and he’s panicking but can’t do a thing can’t move a muscle when suddenly he heard a low but cold voice speaking some language (Latin? But not quite there’s an extra edge to it) beside his bed but he can’t understand a word and the pressure just vanished like that. He whines low in his throat and struggles to move and tries to open his eyes but he’s suddenly very groggy and tired and then he felt gentle hands caressing his face and carding through his hair effectively soothing him and the voice is now crooning sweetly, calming him by saying things like you’re safe love sleep now and when he’s about to fall asleep the hands left that’s when he heard at least three different voices conversing with each other outside maybe? One sound worried, one sound furious and the last one seems to be thinking about something but they’re all speaking in some kind of language that he doesn’t understand.

Okay, I dig, I see what you’re doing here nonnie. 

So this is probably when Roger, John, and Freddie kind of figure out there’s something out there trying to get Brian because Drudes (nightmare demons from Germanic folklore) don’t just take a walk about on the prime material plane. Much less someone who isn’t having a nightmare.

Roger is furious, because after chasing the damned Drude away he checked his seals and found that his demonic protection one has been inverted and draws demons to them. He’s screaming his head off, because he doesn’t know why or how some one would know.

Freddie is just worried because Brian hadn’t reacted to it the way anyone else should have. Almost like he accepted that this was a thing that happened and not a literal demon eating his life force.

John is trying to figure out how the Drude got in on the first place, after Roger found out the seal, and why it would come for Brian directly. Freddie’s got the most “magic” out of the four of them, Brian’s being so tightly wrapped away. Maybe Brian is just awakening his powers and because of his Gift the Drude noticed. But Roger is right, Drudes don’t just come on this plane without cause.

Meanwhile, Brian is out cold/out of it for the next 16 hours because the Drude did get a good grip on Bri’s life force before the other three noticed. Which naturally makes the others clingy for like the next month. Roger keeps forcing his weird wood crafting hobbies into Brian’s bag, and John is always hanging around the physics building and Freddie is painting a really weird thing on the wall. Which kind of makes them look like satanists.

(06) Following no. (05) do you think witches have their own languages akin to Latin but maybe they’re some kind of variation? Also will there be different dialects based on uses, regions and powers?

They all have different casting languages, yes! Most are based on latin, while eastern witches tend to stick with very old forms of their countries languages (e.g chinese with china, Hindi). Some are actually symbol based, which Freddie is very adept at because it gives the most versatility.

(07) And you know like in horror movies how people are with Ouija boards and summoning rituals? Brian of course never participates he avoids most supernatural related stuffs like plague but maybe growing up his encounters people who do those type of stuff for fun and he’s kind hearted not wanting them to be in danger so he’d try to dissuade or stop them but once the spirits or evil beings were conjured the beings always go for Brian? The most severe incident is the Bloody Mary one she appears in mirrors and Brian almost got pulled in trying to save his classmate but eventually he was saved by another witch?

Brian grows up not believing in ghosts, but he can’t deny that’s weird that things happen every time they do mess with Oujia boards. The Bloody Mary thing left him with a permanent inability to walk through hallways in the dark. But he does have the scar on his arm from when whatever it was tried to pull him through the mirror. It was weird. He thinks his friend’s mom stopped it because she game them a really long lecture while bandaging Brian’s arm.

(08) Following no. (07) that’s where my this idea came from: do you think maybe one of Freddie, Roger or John’s family member saved Brian before (when he was a kid? A teenager?) although Brian doesn’t know it? (perhaps he’s passed out during that? Roger and John’s family are more likely to do so simply because of geographic wise?) And that elder witch recognized that Brian belongs in the coven with Freddie, Roger and John so he/she/they got home, told them about this very special boy (girl? person?) that they have to protect one day and proceed to spend years arranging for them to “casually” meet and hopefully become friends or even more?

Never considered this... but this is strangely in line with what kind of Gift I have planned for John.

It would be John’s mom that steps in. Brian accidentally invokes a vengeful spirit while playing in the park. It knocks him into a tree before she can get to him. She quickly banishes it before going over to Brian. Her hands push back his hair, checking his head (only a tiny little bump thankfully) when she feels her son? of all people on his skin. She knows John is a very strong Sympathic but for him to be on someone’s he’s never met.

And for this boy to attract such powerful spirits but existing? He didn’t even know what it was?

Well, she’s never been one to question the whims of the earth. Instead she tosses her hair back and starts yelling for someone to help. Ruth comes over quickly, and Mrs. Deacon explains that Brian fell from the tree. There’s no magic coming from Ruth, not like Brian.

Oh boy, she thinks. This is trouble.

When she goes home John is teasing Julie with a rattle. She picks him up and she bounces him on her hip, “I’ve met a special boy, one you’re going to have to protect and teach.”

(09) I imagine that the other three were waiting for the right time to reveal the truth to Brian while shielding him from not just the spirits or demons’ harm but from evil witch covens as well and maybe one day they just had a very unfortunate run in with some elders who harbor malicious agenda - news travels fast? Very soon EVERYONE and every beings that has connection to the Supernatural world KNOWS (except Brian ofc lol) hence the even more aggressive and violent attacks and the other three were constantly on high alert around Brian (while having to act casually it’s hard work really).

They were trying to find the right time, and there’s never a good time to go “so the dead like you because you’re a good transfer spot between worlds oh and the rest of the supernatural kind of hates you or wants to use you because of that.”

Brian finds out about this entire thing when the witch hits him with paralyzation curse. Well just before it because she basically does the villian info dump.

But just before that, when the attacks were ramping up, the others took turns being on Brian watch, cutting their nights short, sleeping in shifts, etc. Roger is literally running out of grimories to look for seals and protection spells. John has to pratically spell a moat into existence around their flat and even Freddie can’t find something to shield Brian’s presence without hampering his magical awakening. 

They’re all getting exhausted, Brian thinks it’s just stress of recording their first album and school work. Except he’s getting a little stir crazy, he’s literally not had a moment alone since the Drude attack (not that he knows it). So when all three of them invietably crash (between the shortened hours and magic drain it says a lot that they went as long as the did). Brian sneaks out.

I don’t think I have to explain what happens?

(10) Haha I like the idea of Freddie being the wild card in every sense especially when it comes to witchcraft obviously considering his cultural heritage is different from the ones in England so he/she/they dresses differently and casts his/her/their magic differently and it infuriates their opponent so fucking much. XD

Freddie uses a hand gesture, the other witch ????? what in the literal fuck? It bothers Roger too because he’s like, this isn’t going to work *spell works* HOW? WHY? 

John actually starts mimicking Freddie’s way of performing spells and his spells get that much more powerful and chaotic.

(11) Sammy I love you. <3333 *blows you kisses*

❤❤❤❤ Thank you for letting me ramble about things!!!

[kagetsukai]

Drops of Satina: Day 18 - Distance

Raphael Trevelyan belongs to @out-of-the-embers​

Excerpts of correspondence between Hannah and Raphael as they travel around Thedas and miss each other terribly. 

Words: 2048 || Read on AO3

My Darling Hannah,

My life is agony. Whoever decided that Western Approach was a good place to inhabit was mad and I would like some words with them. It’s incredibly dry here and the temperature never stay the same for more than a few hours. Some days it’s terribly hot and other days I have to wear my jacket for warmth. It’s insane. And let’s not mention all the sand; it must’ve seeped into every crevice of my body and no matter how hard I try, I can’t get rid of it. I long for a bath, but that won’t happen until we’ve reached our next destination. At least Varric understands and commiserates with me.

I miss you dearly. I know it’s only been a week since the last time I saw you, but it feels so much longer than that. I really miss our daily walks around the gardens - it’s made even more acute by the fact that there’s almost no plant-life around here. I did come across a flowering deathroot and picked a few buds to send with this letter. Didn’t you mention once how purple was your favorite color? I hope you like them.

Are you well? Were you able to travel safely? I do trust Cullen and his men, but I can’t help worry about you; there’s too many horrible people who do awful things just for a laugh. I hope to hear from you soon, because I desperately need to know you’re alright.

Yours, Raphael

=============================

Dearest Raphael,

I must confess, your dramatic depictions of the Western Approach had me giggling like an idiot. Surely, it can’t be that bad? I’ve never been to a real desert so I can’t say if I agree with your description, but I do hope you got to have a better time than what you’ve described. If not, I’m sorry for your discomfort. If it makes you feel better, I really appreciated the deathroot flowers you’ve sent me - did you know they are hallucinogenic and are used by some as a form of intoxicant? I caught someone eyeing the petals, so I had to hide them in my engineering journals. I hope you don’t mind.

To answer your questions, I am well. As much as I’m thrilled to be out of Skyhold and seeing the world, I desperately miss my own bed. I forgot how much I hate sleeping in tents. That being said, I’m currently in Caer Bronach to look into repairs to the castle, so at least I get to sleep in one of the rooms here. I’m amazed how much lack of proper maintenance can put such a young stronghold into immediate decrepitude. I got to inspect other Fereldan places as well, but I doubt you care to read about it - this isn’t an official report after all. The most important part is that I’m almost done with Inquisition properties here and I’ll be traveling to the other side of Frostbacks soon. Judging by how angry Lily got over the bridge in Exalted Plains, I’m sure to find a doozy.

I will admit, I can’t wait to be done with all inspections so I can be back in Skyhold and awaiting your swift return. I never considered myself the waiting type, so I place all the blame squarely on your shoulders; considering you have strong and capable shoulders, I’m sure you can handle it. I miss you terribly, too. I just don’t have a reason to laugh as much when you’re not around to do dumb things at the most inappropriate times. I also miss having you around during mealtimes - things just don’t taste the same without you adding your salted garlic paste. And really, I just miss your kisses. Your kisses are the best.

Hannah

 [added in a rushed scribble]

Ps. Chargers just arrived with summons to go directly to Western Approach. They are to escort me to Griffon Wing Keep so I can oversee urgent repairs and construction of a bridge through some horribly noxious area. If I’m lucky, I’ll see you there - I cannot wait.

=============================

My Darling Hannah,

I tried to postpone our departure from the Griffon Wing Keep until you’ve arrived, but Lily would not be convinced. Logically, I understand that the sooner we’re done exploring western Orlais the sooner we can be back in Skyhold, but my heart wanted the gratification of seeing you immediately. I hope you received the note I left for you with Rylen; he was terribly amused by it and poked fun at me, that cheeky bastard.

We’re in the Forbidden Oasis and it could not be more different from the Western Approach. It’s still technically in the middle of a desert, but this place has canyons shaded from the sun where all sorts of waterfalls and verdant pools sit in a warm shade. I took the liberty to soak in one of them and it was glorious. I wonder if you’d like it here. According to Lily there isn’t anything to build so she won’t be requesting your presence, which I’m sad about, but perhaps it’s for the better; I loathe the thought of you traveling through the desert. Still, I miss you dearly. It’s been entirely too long since I’ve seen you last and I’m starting to suspect it will be even longer before I see you again. This expedition is shaping up to be long and arduous. I just hope you’re well.

With all my kisses, Raphael

=============================

Dearest Raphael,

Thank you for the lovely note you left me at the Griffon Wing Keep; it brought a smile to my face. Granted, Rylen decided to be a little shit and make fun of me for my reaction, but he changed his tune once I reminded him he’s just a man and can feel pain just like the rest of us. Perhaps I shouldn’t have kicked his balls, but maybe he’ll learn the lesson quicker that way.

Anyway, I now understand why you hated Western Approach so much. This place is so dry, my face has turned into a prune! By the time you see me again, I’ll have aged 20 years and I’ll no longer look youthful; I hope you’re prepared to court a grandmother, because that’s how I will look from now on. At least the area is interesting and should keep me occupied for a while.

Speaking of which, I know I had originally estimated it would only take me a month to attend to everything, but with the exploration of the Western Approach and increased workload, I doubt I’ll make it back to Skyhold anytime soon. Just judging by my initial sketches, I’ll have to stay here for an extra month to make sure everything is done correctly; who knows if something else doesn’t crop up while we work. I hear Lily might be returning to the Griffon Wing Keep at a later date so maybe I’ll get to see you here instead of Skyhold? I would very much like that. As much as I enjoy Rylen and Krem for company, I terribly miss having you around. Can you imagine having a date on the dunes? Sand would get everywhere, I’m certain, but I’d still enjoy it.

I’d like to thank you for all the little flowers you’ve sent with the last letter. They are so pretty! They’ve joined all of the other blooms I keep in my journal and now, whenever I open it, they make me think of you. And they still have the scent! They’re wonderful, so thank you once again.

I hope you’re well and you continue to be well. I cannot wait to see you next, because I miss you dearly and it’s horrible how long I have to be without you. Maybe fates will bring us together soon.

Yours, Hannah

=============================

My Darling Hannah

It’s been a while since my last letter, because we’ve been slowly exploring the entirety of the Hissing Wastes and haven’t been back to the main camp in what feels like an age. Yes, you read that right. Hissing. Wastes. In case the name isn’t a good enough clue, the place is an even larger desert than the Western Approach with even less friendly flora or fauna. The wind blows at extreme speeds and everything is so grey and muted, I think I’m sad just from looking outside my tent at night. I suppose it’s an important spot to the Inquisition, though in my humble opinion, I’d just let it fall by the wayside. Why does Lily have to be the one to look at this stuff? Can’t we send some archaeologists to excavate the dwarven ruins? I suggested that once and Lily only got annoyed with me. I thought it was a good idea, but oh well.

I wonder if you’re still at the Griffon Wing Keep. Judging by my count, you’re probably done with your work and heading back to Skyhold as we speak, though I do hope you are still there when we arrive later this week. Maybe that way we could escort you back home? I’d love that, I won’t lie. I miss you so damn much. Normally I don’t mind traipsing around Thedas with Lily, but being away from home is really difficult this time; not only it’s a longer trip than any before, but I now have a reason to want to return. I wish all of this was over already, so I wouldn’t have to travel so much. I miss our daily chats. I miss you.

Always yours, Raphael

=============================

My Dearest Raphael,

I miss you, desperately. It’s been too long since we’ve kissed or held each other or even talked, and I’m going a little crazy from this clutching feeling in my chest I associate with not having you around. I hate the fact that we’re apart and there isn’t much we can do about it. I cannot wait to be back at Skyhold with you, so we can go back to some semblance of normalcy. I’m done with being on the road and constantly sleeping in a bed that isn’t my own. I’m done and I want to go home.

Instead of Skyhold, I’m in Exalted Plains. When Lily first told me of how Master Wardell completely neglected his duties when constructing this bridge, I hadn’t expected this level of incompetence. I mean, it’s a functional bridge, but with the kind of resources we are given, he should have been able to repair this gap properly and in no time. Thankfully, the team I already have here is hard-working and not afraid of challenges. Once I draw up new plans and divide up the responsibilities, all work will be done fast. I hate that I have to once again clean up Wardell’s messes, but it can’t be helped. At least this is the last of it.

I hope you are well. I hope you are taking care of yourself. I hope to see you soon.

Yours, Hannah

=============================

My Darling Hannah,

We are on our way home. We just passed through Exalted Plains and I got to admire your handiwork in person - you’ve done a fantastic job here, dearest. Lily is also happy with the results, but I’m sure she’ll want to thank you in person, so I’ll let her speak for herself. Still, I’m proud of you. This bridge and what you’ve done in the Western Approach proves that you are the right person for the job and I’m so glad you are finally recognized for your hard work.

I will see you soon, my darling, and I cannot wait. Lily wants to stop by Emprise du Lion to take care of some dragons, but once we’re done, we’re coming home. I cannot wait to see your beautiful face again. I miss you so fucking much. We will be together soon.

Forever yours, Raphael

=============================

Raphael,

I came back to Skyhold two days ago and I am thrilled beyond words to finally have my own bed back. I cannot wait to have you back as well. I spoke to Leliana and she said you should be home within a week, so I won’t be making this letter long. I miss you and I’m looking forward to seeing you again. Be safe.

Yours, Hannah

[bountyofbeads]

As The US Debates “Concentration Camps,” These Jews Are Trying To Actually Shut Them Down https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/juliareinstein/jews-against-ice-never-again-immigration-concentration-camp?s=mobile_app

Donald Trump American Jews are not monolithic, stop using them to justify #TrumpCamps. These camps for children, women and men are dehumanizing, inhumane and shameful. We are better than this. #NeverAgain #NeverForget

“In these moments there are people who are courageous and take action, and there are bystanders,” Rubin said. “You don’t have to think of yourself as an activist to do this.”

Young Jewish Activists Seek To Shut Down ICE "Concentration Camps

"My whole life I’ve been told these stories by my community," said one young Jewish activist. "Those alarms are going off in my head.”

Julia Reinstein | Published July 20, 2019, at 7:31 a.m. | BuzzFeed | Posted July 20, 2019 |

In a messy Airbnb in northeast Washington, DC, Alyssa Rubin, 25, and Ben Doernberg, 30, passed a stale loaf of challah back and forth on Monday as they planned how they were going to shut down ICE.

“Okay, let’s all share whatever updates we have aaand...your favorite ice cream flavor!” said Rubin, introducing an impromptu icebreaker during one of their regular video conference calls with other organizers.

Surrounded by open suitcases, an air mattress, at least one Popeyes bag, and a mishmash of chips and Cheez-It containers, the two-story row house in DC’s Shaw neighborhood could easily be the site of a sleepaway camp reunion. Instead, this week it served as headquarters for Never Again Action, a brand-new movement of young American Jews calling for Immigration and Customs Enforcement to be shut down and the closure of immigrant detention centers nationwide.

About 15 activists from cities all over the US stayed in the house this week — sleeping on mismatched couches, a futon, and the floor — to pull off their biggest action yet: a march on Tuesday from the National Mall to the ICE headquarters, where they planned to quite literally shut the building down.

There’s been a lot of talk in recent months about Jewish identity and anti-Semitism in the US. First-year Democrat Rep. Ilhan Omar had to apologize in February for tweets against the pro-Israel lobby that she later seemed to acknowledge could be interpreted as containing “anti-Semitic tropes” — although she denied this was her intention. Then last month Ilhan’s fellow “Squad” memberRep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez drew backlash from Republicans and Democrats when she used the term “concentration camps” to describe immigrant detention centers. Vice President Mike Pence said she had “cheapened” the memory of the Holocaust “to advance some left-wing political narrative,” while New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo called it a “wholly inappropriate comparison.” Even the US Holocaust Memorial museum in DC took offense.

But while politicians debate semantics, and the media discusses whether  Jewish identity is being coopted as a political “shield,” these young Jews are instead taking action. For them, there are clear and painful parallels between their relatives’ past and the present treatment of undocumented immigrants — and their Jewish identity is compelling them to do something about it.

So over the course of just three weeks, they’ve been working day and night to build a movement to upend Trump’s immigration policy and close the detention centers once and for all.

“I don’t care what we call them,” said Rubin of the centers. “I care that we stop them.”

Never Again Action is about as new as movements come. It started on June 24 when Serena Adlerstein, a 25-year-old organizer in Michigan with immigrant rights group Movimiento Cosecha, posted a Facebook status asking if any Jews would be down to protest at a detention center. They got on their first call the same night.

“It was kind of just this offhand Facebook post … and then people starting commenting like, ‘Yes, but actually!’” Adlerstein said. “I think we could all sense the political moment we were in, and we were like, ‘If we’re going to actually do this, we need to do an action fairly quickly.’”

Less than a week later, on June 30, 36 people were arrested during Never Again Action’s first protest when they blocked entrances to a detention center in Elizabeth, New Jersey. They were subsequently charged with obstruction of a public passage, issued a summons, and released, authorities told NJ.com.

After that, the protests just kept coming. In Boston earlier this month, more than 1,000 marched from the New England Holocaust Memorial to the Suffolk County House of Correction, where ICE keeps some of its detainees. In San Francisco, they protested outside Nancy Pelosi’s office, chanting “Never again is now” and “Until you close the camps, we will close your building.” Protests have also been held in Philadelphia, the Los Angeles  area,  Chicago, and Buffalo.

Some of the young adult leaders have previous organizing experience through other Jewish social action groups. But taking on a project on this level — trying to build a brand-new national movement in Trump’s America — is a different beast. Almost like a mantra that they repeat as if to remind themselves, they frequently say that they’re “really building the plane as [they] fly it.”

They now have a Slack team with nearly 200 members. In one channel, called #i-want-to-do-a-thing, people volunteer for any task, big or small, that gets dropped in. Evan Feldberg-Bannatyne, a 21-year-old student at Earlham College in Indiana, serves as the group’s fundraising lead, despite having no prior experience doing that kind of work. On one of the first Never Again Action’s video calls, he volunteered to take on the role simply because no one else had. The next day, he set up a GoFundMe with the intention of raising about $25,000 to pay bail for those risking arrest at the New Jersey protest. They wound up raising $180,000. “On the way back from the [New Jersey protest], I was just refreshing every five minutes watching the GoFundMe tick up and up and up,” he said.

Now, the 21-year-old is in charge of all the group’s financial operations, running a team that handles budgeting, reimbursements, and fiscal sponsorships, which he describes as “super dry stuff but super important.”

“This is really how I practice my Judaism — through social justice,” he said.

American Jews have a long historywhen it comes to social justice work, ranging from the labor unions of the 19th-century Eastern European Jewish garment workers to the large number of Jewish Freedom Riders during the civil rights movement. Today, Jews in the US overwhelmingly vote for Democrats, with 71% opting for Hillary Clinton in the 2016 presidential election. But much like the movement that has fractured the Democratic Party in recent months, progressive Jews have also been making themselves heard. A number of progressive Jewish groups — many of which the Never Again Action organizers are a part of — have grown in prominence, including Jews for Racial and Economic Justice and IfNotNow, a group that opposes Israel’s treatment of Palestinians. Unlike more senior members of the Democratic establishment, these Jewish activists are much more likely to speak out against Israel and much less likely to bristle at Holocaust comparisons.

Though comparisons to the Holocaust have not been universally welcomed, the current immigration crisis — seeing people rounded up in cages, separated from their families, humiliated by guards, and deprived of food, water, and showers — evokes a particularly painful and frightening sense of déjà vu for many Jews.

“This is authoritarianism — we’ve seen this before,” said Brandon Mond, 25. “This is a state agency that’s able to just roll around the streets and abduct people at random. My whole life I’ve been told these stories by my community that say that’s a bad sign, so those alarms are going off in my head.”

After working in Democratic politics, Mond had a bit of a reckoning after Clinton lost the 2016 election; he pivoted to organizing with a progressive Jewish group. He thinks many people “associate with the Democratic Party the way you associate with a sports team,” but he’s been frustrated with how the Democrats have responded to what he called the “human rights travesty” at the border. Like other progressives, he says his frustration has reached boiling point.

“I don’t feel accountable to the Democratic Party — I feel accountable to people, particularly people who are really getting fucked over by the system,” Mond said. “If the Democratic Party wants to step up and help those people, I’ll gladly back them. But if they’re going to stand there and fund Border Patrol and ICE facilities like Pelosi and the Democrats did last week, why would I be accountable to them?”

Much like the Democrats have been split on whether to fund the centers, they’ve also been divided on whether it’s appropriate to call them “concentration camps.” Sen. Brian Schatz and Rep. Jerry Nadler, both of whom are Jewish, defended Ocasio-Cortez’s use of the term amid the controversy. But Rep. Josh Gottheimer, who is also Jewish, called the comparison “cruel and disrespectful to the six million who were murdered in the Holocaust, including members of my own family.” New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio also said “of course she was wrong” to make the comparison, while even Sen. Bernie Sanders  distanced himself from the comment.

But the Never Again Action members are leaning right into the comparison. They draw their name, after all, from a phrase directly associated with the Holocaust. Activist Sophie Ellman-Golan, 27, said the label “concentration camp” is appropriate because “we should be using the strongest possible words to describe what’s happening right now.”

“If the use of that term does prompt people to feel uncomfortable or hurt,” she said, “those are the right feelings to have about what’s happening right now.”

On Monday evening, the Jewish organizers and many of the protesters gathered in St. Stephen and the Incarnation Episcopal Church in northern DC, where they trained for the next day’s demonstration, painted signs, and learned protest songs next to stained glass windows depicting Christian saints and beneath a hanging wooden crucifix. The local church is known for serving as a home base for progressive movements and for its association with the punk scene.

“We are the voice within your heart / Plus 11 million / So listen, so listen,” one of the songs went, referring to the 11 million undocumented immigrants estimated to be living in the US.

Emilia Feldman, 23, a Jewish Latina organizer with Movimiento Cosecha, spoke of how personal this movement feels; her grandparents were Holocaust survivors, and her friend, an asylum-seeker from Honduras, has been in a detention center for six months.

“He has been denied his basic human rights in really horrible ways,” Feldman said, tears forming in her eyes. “I’ve gotten phone calls from him saying things like ‘I can’t do this anymore’ and ‘I want to sign papers for my own deportation,’ but he knows if he is deported back to Honduras, he will be killed.”

Never Again Action and Movimiento Cosecha coordinated the DC protest, with Never Again Action’s main goal being to amplify Cosecha’s mission of securing permanent protection for all undocumented immigrants and ending deportation and detention. Cata Santiago, a 22-year-old Movimiento Cosecha organizer who is not Jewish, said she’s “really appreciative of the Jewish community who’s uplifting the voices of the undocumented immigrants.”

“[They’re] also collaborating with Cosecha as a movement that’s on the front lines, and that in itself to me is powerful and deserving of respect,” said Santiago.

In the late night hours of Monday, the protesters walked in the dark, carrying a 20-foot-long banner that read “PELOSI, NEVER AGAIN IS NOW #DIGNITYNOTDETENTION” through the streets of DC to a local organizer’s apartment. Along the way, several passersby asked what it meant.

“Dignity, not detention!” one of the people carrying the banner yelled back. “See you on the Mall at noon?”

Early Tuesday morning, the organizers furiously typed away on laptops and took phone calls, arranging last-minute details for the action. Ben Doernberg didn’t go to sleep until 4:30 a.m. and woke up just three hours later. “I know that’s not good, and I think there can be glorification of that — but when you’re this close to getting something done, you do what you have to do,” he said.

In a Lyft ride to the National Mall, the organizers sang along to Panic! at the Disco’s “I Write Sins Not Tragedies” as Rubin offered everyone sunscreen.

Protesters wearing yellow T-shirts that read “Never again, para nadie” slowly but surely gathered on the Mall. They eventually numbered over an estimated 1,000 people. All the planning had been a success. The leaders weren’t out here alone.

Singing songs in Spanish, Hebrew, and English, they marched through the streets of the nation’s capital.

Upon reaching the ICE headquarters in southwest DC, the demonstrators formed human chains, blocking the building’s entrances, exits, and the surrounding streets. Eleven protesters entered the building and refused to leave, eventually being arrested for unlawful entry, police told BuzzFeed News.

According to a leaked email written by the acting director of ICE, the building went into lockdown during the protest.

“It’s not just symbolic — we’re actually shutting down ICE,” Rubin said.

A few ICE employees who were returning from their lunch breaks were unable to get back in the building. At least one employee confronted a Latina protester, who said he had called her a “little bitch” due to her sign comparing ICE to Nazis.

The older male employee, who declined to share his name with BuzzFeed News, wouldn’t confirm he’d said it but added that he “didn’t like her sign.”

“I’m not a Nazi,” he said. “I’m a hardworking government employee.”

Though mostly twentysomethings organized the action, the ages represented at the protest were incredibly varied. Parents marched hand in hand with their daughters. People in their sixties and seventies showed up in droves. Perhaps the youngest attendee was 4-month-old Norah, whose mother changed her diaper just feet from the ICE building. “We’re both descendants of refugees, and it’s important we stand with other refugees against hate and demonization,” said the 30-year-old mother, who asked to only be identified by her first name, Sarah. “We know what it feels like.”

Rabbi Arthur Waskow, an 86-year-old who was once active in the civil rights movement and Vietnam War protests, stood with his back against the doors of ICE. Cane in hand, he wore a T-shirt that said “Resisting tyrants since Pharaoh.”

“You can’t use a dictionary or an encyclopedia to understand the word ‘concentration camp,’” Waskow said in a speech to the protesters. “What you need is a calendar, because concentration camps over time turn into death camps if you don’t stop them.”

With temperatures above 90 degrees and the DC humidity in full force, it was not an easy day for a protest. A team of organizers walked around doling out water bottles, Nature Valley bars, and sunscreen throughout the day. Organizer Yael Shafritz frequently reminded people to reapply sunscreen and stay hydrated — “because,” Shafritz said, “I’m a Jewish mother.”

After the protest, the organizers retreated to their Airbnb “HQ,” where they took turns showering and wolfed down Chinese takeout served family style. People filtered back to the house throughout the evening, always greeted with a beer and “Have you eaten?”

The mood was exhausted yet celebratory, with many of the organizers expressing relief and amazement with how quickly they had managed to pull off the demonstration.

Still, there was an undercurrent of sadness. The protest had been a success, but their goals won’t be accomplished that easily.

Becca Lubow, a 21-year-old University of Michigan student, was exhausted and said she wanted “to sleep for a year,” but added that there’s still so much work left to do.

“I can’t believe it’s only been two weeks of this — but at the end of it, there’s still kids in cages,” Lubow said, adjusting the pillow on which she was lying on the floor. “I just don’t know how to want a normal life while that’s happening.”

Never Again Action already has about 15 more protests in the works, Rubin said, but members don’t currently have plans to register it as an organization or nonprofit. In August, they’re planning on having a retreat to talk next steps. “The Jewish community is so hyper-organized, and everyone’s trying to start a new organization,” Rubin said. “But this is a mobilization that’s trying to achieve a very specific goal, and we don’t need to exist for longer than the goal requires.”

Among this group, the concept of “tikkun olam” — the Jewish value of repairing the world — runs deep. Rubin said she hopes people who have never been involved in protests before feel inspired by what they achieved in DC and feel compelled to step up to the plate.

“In these moments there are people who are courageous and take action, and there are bystanders,” Rubin said. “You don’t have to think of yourself as an activist to do this.” ●

[eternal-reverie]

Hints of Lauriam’s personality?

Ever since we saw flower themed nobodies in the 2015 trailer and the appearance of Lauriam last August in KHUX, I’ve been thinking about how Marluxia will impact the story in KH 3 and how mysterious his motives and personality are so far. All we really know is that in CoM, he was treasonous and that he manipulated children to further his own goals without any remorse. 

One thing to take into account was his status as a Nobody at the time, so feeling no empathy could have made his personality more ruthless. We also have to remember that we still don’t know exactly why he wanted to overthrow the organization other than to simply usurp power (a pretty shallow motivation for an antagonist.) The revelation in DDD of Organization XIII’s true purpose also opens up to Marluxia’s possible motives in overthrowing the organization as other people have mentioned.

So in trying to figure out who exactly Marluxia is, and by extension Lauriam, I started to dig into the references of him in 358/2 Days mission mode.

Depending on the gear you install in the panel system, his scythe changes shape and abilities. All of them are named after flowers and many have a sort of negative or sad adjective placed before them (some have adjectives describing grandeur and beauty too). The names of the flowers are rich in symbolism and meaning, some referring to tragic myths about loss, love, and betrayal. With what we currently know in KHUX, they are fun to look at and analyze. All together, they show his association with flowers, tragedy, and death. Add the scythe and him with the black hooded coat you get the obvious grim reaper imagery he has going on. 

One gear I want to particularly look at is the Mystery Gear, a gear that “draws forth the wielder’s personality.” When it’s installed, his scythe radically changes shape to actually resemble a flower, particularly a Lily of the Valley.

The English localization calls it “Dainty Bellflowers” but the Japanese name 優雅なるスズラン directly refers the weapon as Elegant Lily of the Valley. They tend to generally represent humility, sweetness and a return or start of happiness in flower language.  I also checked the hanakotoba meaning (Japanese flower language) and have found it to also mean “sweetness.” When you see these flowers in real life they are absolutely tiny and unassuming yet their fragrance is actually very strong. In contrast to their appearance, they are actually highly toxic if consumed. They come in white and pink varieties.

When I first saw Dainty Bellflowers back in 2009, I was really confused on how this could have represented his personality (this can be said for other members before BBS.)  The way this weapons plays in the game is that whenever you hit an enemy, a cute, poppy sound rings. And in comparison to his other dangerous looking scythes, it’s really bright and cheery. It’s worth noting that the abilities that can be added onto it are Heart Bonus and Second Chance, which are healing and reviving abilities. Funnily enough, this Dainty Bellflowers resembles the pixie petal keyblade found in BBS.

What could this mean for Lauriam?  Could he be like what this weapon is implying? Is he a sweet and unassuming kid completely opposite to the proud and cruel Marluxia? The curing abilities are also the complete opposite of the death motif that Marluxia carries as well. Perhaps the only thing that is shared between them here is the inherent toxicity of this plant represented. My personal theory is that Lauriam is going against who he naturally is and be shoved into an antagonistic role, either willingly (for some sort of selfish gain or perhaps what he feels for the greater good) or forced to by some unknown party. 

Everyone is quick to point fingers as to who killed Strelitzia but I just want to remind everyone that they're only children, affected heavily by the looming reality of war, pushing them to make extreme choices. If Lauriam actually did it, I feel like his motivation in doing that is so much more than just wanting to have a position of power and maliciously slaying Strelitzia in order to gain that. It cant’t be a coincidence that they share a plant motif. This connection between them will definitely come up again.

Last thing I want to point out are the rings you can equip in Days. There are 13 elemental resistance rings each representing the thriteen members. The ring called “Flowers Athirst” representing Marluxia.  The localized name of this ring is pointing out his desire for presumably power, but the original Japanese calls the ring 聖花のうれい “Grief of the Lotus”. Lotus flowers represent purity, rebirth, and considered to be a sacred flower. A lost chance of rebirth perhaps? Besides those meanings, in hanakotoba, they mean, “far from the one he loves.” 

HMMM… 

sorry im pushing my friendship headcanon

Lotus imagery can be also seen in that pod Sora sleeps in between games. It was in that pod on the 13th floor of C.O. that Marluxia was going to place Sora in, to then brainwash and use to complete his takeover of the organization. Perhaps that’s where his “grief” lies. I could just go on and on about his other scythes and the things they could imply. Who really knows if Nomura planned this in advanced for his backstory. I just think the stuff presented here are cool ideas that might be developed more in the khux updates hopefully.

[hxlfsoul]

Headcanon dump. Feel free to disagree, but if you do and approach me about it, please be nice?

Shoto is asexual demiromantic. This means he has no interest in sexual stuff in general and he will only be romantically attracted to people he feels close to.

I will carry the idea into threads - and I do, a lot - that the more threads I have with someone, the closer they are (while all are separate verses, if it’s with the same blog, then it counts as him feeling closer to certain class members as the thread continues/we start new threads). This closeness does carry from my canon verse into the pro hero verse (however, other verses are only influenced by what happens in that specific verse).

He actually regrets his choices when it comes to his hero outfits but he feels it would be more effort than it’s worth to change it - although, he does change to a nicer looking outfit for pro hero verse. I’ll probably do a rough sketch of my idea but I cannot draw so bear with me when I do that one.

While he had bad fashion sense - for the most part - at the start of highschool, by third year he’s learned how to dress in a way that’s both classy and casual (like button-down shirts with jeans, for example).

While Shoto isn’t really a fan of jewellery and accessories, he can often be found wearing flower crowns after the end of first year.

He and Uraraka probably made friendship bracelets for the izucrew and other friends - Asui, Iida, Midoriya and Momo all have bracelets from the two. (Shoto has probably given bracelets to Kaminari, Mina and several OCs as well, just from threads/interactions with ones he classes as friends).

Shoto loves physical affection, but he gets overwhelmed very easily and will shy away from it in public too. However, he enjoys holding hands with his friends, short hugs etc etc.

Upon graduation, Shoto got keychains for his friends. Two for each of them. One keychain was a picture of them all and the other was a cartoon cat, a different colour for each person corresponding to the colours he associates with them.

Shoto has a colour he associates with everyone he knows. For his mother, it’s a pristine white, for his father a fiery orange, for Midoriya forest green etc etc. Often, gifts given for birthdays/christmas and the like to those friends have to do with that colour, even if he never actually says anything about it.

Shoto finds comfort in music and when he feels anxious or overwhelmed, he usually puts headphones on and listens to his favourite bands. He feels the messages from music and relatable lyrics help him cope with his past and his feelings.

He also has a song he associates with each of his classmates/teachers, but he would never tell them what it was.

While he never really knew Touya, he does miss him - more in the sense he misses the brotherly relationship they could have had.

He is good with words, but only when writing - he can phrase things in beautiful, descriptive ways while writing them, but actually speaking? he stuggles a lot with it at times.

He has a habit of denying anything troubles him when confronted about it. He may give offhanded comments then and again that hint at his past, but when someone directly confronts him, he can feel panicked, so therefore denies it and attempts to change the conversation topic.

He does want to forgive his father, despite his intense hatred towards him, but he still feels like his father isn’t trying hard enough or doing enough to fix their family. In the end, while he doesn’t want much to do with the man, he wouldn’t really completely cast him aside either as he holds onto the childish hope that his father truly is going to change for the better and at some point, he’ll be able to forgive him.

This does not mean he doesn’t hate him, it just means he wants to stop hating him - and just because he forgives him doesn’t mean he’ll forget either.

If his father went back to abusive habits after Shoto finally got over it, he’d have no problem cutting Endeavor out of his life completely. He just believes that everyone deserves a second chance, even if they’ve done terrible things.

He also doesn’t hate his father as much as he thinks he does, he realised that when he felt distressed at the idea of him dying. He knows he still harbours an intense hate, but it doesn’t mean he wishes for Endeavor to be hurt/killed. The idea of that actually upsets him a lot.

He just rules it off as being that Endeavor is still his family, no matter what (he would feel the same way about Dabi, for example, if Dabi turned out to be Toya. He doesn’t want his family to be hurt even if they’ve done pretty terrible things that Shoto couldn’t forgive).

This does NOT mean the mun is an Endeavor apologist or anything, I’m just trying to be realistic to a point - no matter how much you hate someone who is family, you can still feel upset at the idea of anything bad happening to them. This is just how complex human emotion actually is. I don’t think Endeavor has redeemed himself or is anywhere close during the canon time, but Shoto wouldn’t be able to hold onto that hatred forever. No one can hold onto hatred forever, no matter how intense.

I don’t excuse what he has done nor do I condone/tolerate it either, I am aware of the extent of his abuse towards Shoto and his family, I am aware it was TERRIBLE and UNFORGIVABLE, but that doesn’t mean there’s no possibility of him being forgiven, only that it would take a hell of a lot of work, time and effort.

It is unhealthy to hold onto hatred and the past as much as Shoto does, which is he fully of aware of, hence why I portray him as someone who WANTS to forgive Endeavor but feels as if he CAN’T in the current time. It’s the same for Dabi - he (and the mun) acknowledge the mistakes made, crimes etc and that there are consequences as their should be.

I just wanted to clarify that before people accuse me of being an apologist/condoning and tolerating abuse because honestly, I really really do not. As someone who has faced that sort of thing as a child, I understand the things such harm can cause (although not on the same level as Shoto) and I understand how hard forgiveness is when it comes to it.

So please, no hate for that. It’s just what I, personally, believe and what I feel the muse would think too. Anyone who doesn’t like it? Don’t send me hate, you don’t have to agree or pay attention to that as it isn’t really in any threads. If it’s that much of a problem for anyone, I’d rather you unfollow and block though. I don’t want to be involved in anything just bc of a couple headcanons. It’s completely valid if people have headcanons that are the complete opposite, I support that stuff entirely as well.

Anyway back to the headcanons:

In his dorm, Shoto has several boxes of stationary with cute, novelty things. For example, butterfly rubbers, paw print covered pencils etc etc. He has a soft spot for adorable things.

He chose the hero name Lacuna half way through second year after spending some time researching interesting words (because he was bored). Lacuna means “missing piece” and he feels that symbolises how he felt like he was missing something his whole life, after his mother was sent away and such.

He eventually chose his full title to be “The Guiding Hero: Lacuna” as he wants to be a hero who guides others, who helps with bad situations - a dependable person people feel they can go to outside of fighting villains and rescue operations.

After graduation, he spent a year working at Endeavor Hero Agency before leaving and starting his own agency. He plans to merge both when his father retires if Endeavor Hero Agency is left to him. Shoto has no plans to take his father’s hero name when he does retire, as he wants to be a separate person - his own person.

He would explain as much to his father if he felt it was important to or he was asked to take up the name of Endeavor at a later date.

He loves pale blues more than any other colour and often decorates rooms using it (he painted all the walls in his first apartment blue).

The reason he tries to excel at things and work hard is because he fears being thought of as a disappointment by anything.

[hxlfsoul-a]

Headcanon dump. Feel free to disagree, but if you do and approach me about it, please be nice?

Shoto is asexual demiromantic. This means he has no interest in sexual stuff in general and he will only be romantically attracted to people he feels close to.

I will carry the idea into threads - and I do, a lot - that the more threads I have with someone, the closer they are (while all are separate verses, if it’s with the same blog, then it counts as him feeling closer to certain class members as the thread continues/we start new threads). This closeness does carry from my canon verse into the pro hero verse (however, other verses are only influenced by what happens in that specific verse).

He actually regrets his choices when it comes to his hero outfits but he feels it would be more effort than it’s worth to change it - although, he does change to a nicer looking outfit for pro hero verse. I’ll probably do a rough sketch of my idea but I cannot draw so bear with me when I do that one.

While he had bad fashion sense - for the most part - at the start of highschool, by third year he’s learned how to dress in a way that’s both classy and casual (like button-down shirts with jeans, for example).

While Shoto isn’t really a fan of jewellery and accessories, he can often be found wearing flower crowns after the end of first year.

He and Uraraka probably made friendship bracelets for the izucrew and other friends - Asui, Iida, Midoriya and Momo all have bracelets from the two. (Shoto has probably given bracelets to Kaminari, Mina and several OCs as well, just from threads/interactions with ones he classes as friends).

Shoto loves physical affection, but he gets overwhelmed very easily and will shy away from it in public too. However, he enjoys holding hands with his friends, short hugs etc etc.

Upon graduation, Shoto got keychains for his friends. Two for each of them. One keychain was a picture of them all and the other was a cartoon cat, a different colour for each person corresponding to the colours he associates with them.

Shoto has a colour he associates with everyone he knows. For his mother, it’s a pristine white, for his father a fiery orange, for Midoriya forest green etc etc. Often, gifts given for birthdays/christmas and the like to those friends have to do with that colour, even if he never actually says anything about it.

Shoto finds comfort in music and when he feels anxious or overwhelmed, he usually puts headphones on and listens to his favourite bands. He feels the messages from music and relatable lyrics help him cope with his past and his feelings.

He also has a song he associates with each of his classmates/teachers, but he would never tell them what it was.

While he never really knew Touya, he does miss him - more in the sense he misses the brotherly relationship they could have had.

He is good with words, but only when writing - he can phrase things in beautiful, descriptive ways while writing them, but actually speaking? he stuggles a lot with it at times.

He has a habit of denying anything troubles him when confronted about it. He may give offhanded comments then and again that hint at his past, but when someone directly confronts him, he can feel panicked, so therefore denies it and attempts to change the conversation topic.

He does want to forgive his father, despite his intense hatred towards him, but he still feels like his father isn’t trying hard enough or doing enough to fix their family. In the end, while he doesn’t want much to do with the man, he wouldn’t really completely cast him aside either as he holds onto the childish hope that his father truly is going to change for the better and at some point, he’ll be able to forgive him.

This does not mean he doesn’t hate him, it just means he wants to stop hating him - and just because he forgives him doesn’t mean he’ll forget either. 

If his father went back to abusive habits after Shoto finally got over it, he’d have no problem cutting Endeavor out of his life completely. He just believes that everyone deserves a second chance, even if they’ve done terrible things.

He also doesn’t hate his father as much as he thinks he does, he realised that when he felt distressed at the idea of him dying. He knows he still harbours an intense hate, but it doesn’t mean he wishes for Endeavor to be hurt/killed. The idea of that actually upsets him a lot.

He just rules it off as being that Endeavor is still his family, no matter what (he would feel the same way about Dabi, for example, if Dabi turned out to be Toya. He doesn’t want his family to be hurt even if they’ve done pretty terrible things that Shoto couldn’t forgive).

This does NOT mean the mun is an Endeavor apologist or anything, I’m just trying to be realistic to a point - no matter how much you hate someone who is family, you can still feel upset at the idea of anything bad happening to them. This is just how complex human emotion actually is. I don’t think Endeavor has redeemed himself or is anywhere close during the canon time, but Shoto wouldn’t be able to hold onto that hatred forever. No one can hold onto hatred forever, no matter how intense.

I don’t excuse what he has done nor do I condone/tolerate it either, I am aware of the extent of his abuse towards Shoto and his family, I am aware it was TERRIBLE and UNFORGIVABLE, but that doesn’t mean there’s no possibility of him being forgiven, only that it would take a hell of a lot of work, time and effort.

It is unhealthy to hold onto hatred and the past as much as Shoto does, which is he fully of aware of, hence why I portray him as someone who WANTS to forgive Endeavor but feels as if he CAN’T in the current time. It’s the same for Dabi - he (and the mun) acknowledge the mistakes made, crimes etc and that there are consequences as their should be.

I just wanted to clarify that before people accuse me of being an apologist/condoning and tolerating abuse because honestly, I really really do not. As someone who has faced that sort of thing as a child, I understand the things such harm can cause (although not on the same level as Shoto) and I understand how hard forgiveness is when it comes to it.

So please, no hate for that. It’s just what I, personally, believe and what I feel the muse would think too. Anyone who doesn’t like it? Don’t send me hate, you don’t have to agree or pay attention to that as it isn’t really in any threads. If it’s that much of a problem for anyone, I’d rather you unfollow and block though. I don’t want to be involved in anything just bc of a couple headcanons. It’s completely valid if people have headcanons that are the complete opposite, I support that stuff entirely as well.

Anyway back to the headcanons:

In his dorm, Shoto has several boxes of stationary with cute, novelty things. For example, butterfly rubbers, paw print covered pencils etc etc. He has a soft spot for adorable things.

He chose the hero name Lacuna half way through second year after spending some time researching interesting words (because he was bored). Lacuna means “missing piece” and he feels that symbolises how he felt like he was missing something his whole life, after his mother was sent away and such.

He eventually chose his full title to be “The Guiding Hero: Lacuna” as he wants to be a hero who guides others, who helps with bad situations - a dependable person people feel they can go to outside of fighting villains and rescue operations.

After graduation, he spent a year working at Endeavor Hero Agency before leaving and starting his own agency. He plans to merge both when his father retires if Endeavor Hero Agency is left to him. Shoto has no plans to take his father’s hero name when he does retire, as he wants to be a separate person - his own person.

He would explain as much to his father if he felt it was important to or he was asked to take up the name of Endeavor at a later date.

He loves pale blues more than any other colour and often decorates rooms using it (he painted all the walls in his first apartment blue).

The reason he tries to excel at things and work hard is because he fears being thought of as a disappointment by anything.

[ayearofpike]

The Cold One

Tom Doherty Associates, 1995 394 pages, 38 chapters + epilogue & 12-page prologue ISBN 0-812-51245-6 LOC: PS3566.I486 C65 1995 OCLC: 31289835 Released December 28, 1994 (per B&N) Mass printing December 15, 1995 (per B&N)

The Cold One is no longer under guidance from its external voice. Without this incessant instruction, it does not know what comes next anymore. All it knows is that its destiny is to destroy humanity — an outcome that it has no feelings or concerns about whatsoever. What exactly is this creature? Where did it come from? How will it carry out its inevitable mission? We're going to have to read about a whole bunch of other people, and how the Cold One connects to them, to find out.

Oof. This book is a monster, which is part of why it's taken me over a week to write a new post. (The other part is, you know, stuff.) There's a lot going on, and even though a lot of it ties back to stuff Pike's written before, this is a new story with new uses for the same elements. In that vein, I was surprised to find that I didn't remember a single word or a single plot point out of this story — which allowed me to no doubt be freshly disappointed by the rushed ending.

I mentioned that there are a bunch of characters. For the first time in a while, Pike's writing from multiple viewpoints again, which makes me unsure how to best approach this summary. It probably makes the most sense to just begin at the beginning and describe the people and their doings as they appear in the narrative. It won’t be the fastest way to cover this book, but let’s be real: that’s not what I’m here for.

That prologue? It's two prologues, actually. We start with Penny Hampton, a rehab nurse at a hospice facility who works on unresponsive patients so that they don't totally atrophy while comatose. She's creeped out by one particular patient who has been there since before anybody can remember, and this is justified when the power goes out and she gets her breath taken away — literally — while manually respirating her. Worse is when the patient uses her first living breath in years to speak: just two words, one of which Pike doesn't tell us right now because it would give too much away I guess. Oh, and this is the last time we hear directly from Penny, which is a little bit of a rip, especially toward the end. We'll get there.

The second prologue is from the perspective of the Cold One Itself. You read that right — whenever It narrates, Its preferred personal pronoun is It, capital I. (Which might make my writing awkward in this entry as I attempt to avoid using "it" for other things.) We discover that It has been guided by a voice (or as It says, a "Voice") that has just stopped, and now It has awakened into Itself somewhere in Baja California. It no longer knows what comes next, but It knows that ultimately It will be responsible for the death of humanity. And It decides to start with the dude that picks It up hitchhiking. I'm not totally sure this was necessary as a prologue; I think it would have been just fine as Chapter One, seeing as it ties into the continuation of the story. We get plenty more chapters from the Cold One's POV, so it wouldn't have felt particularly out of place to have this start the story proper.

But how we launch is in a dream, inside the brain of journalist and educator Peter Jacobs. He's fishing with an old and dear friend, a beautiful girl who catches a creepy sea monster and then tries to undo his pants, but he's woken by the ringing phone. On the other end is a creepazoid who implies that he knows something about the mysterious and gruesome death of a young woman two weeks before. He hangs up before Peter can get any specifics out of him, but it feels weirdly like an extension of the dream. He does manage to record most of the conversation, to go over at work.

We learn a little more about Peter here as he prepares for his day: how his roommate is a mentally handicapped friend with whom he's grown up in foster care, how his job is writing a nationally-syndicated column that promotes good news in a somewhat cynical voice, how he had a girlfriend who got pregnant and had a miscarriage and left him with no explanation just that fast. None of this is covered in much depth here, which is OK because it allows us to fill in the blanks and then be surprised when Pike fills them in later on. 

Peter plays the tape for his editor, who wants him to go to the police. As it happens, the police are investigating another unusual death, and ask him to come to the scene. The MO is totally different — a dude smothered and then stabbed in the heart — but it's linked to the other girl by a similar fingerprint. In fact, there have been half a dozen killings split between these two methods that are tied by the same print. I'm not sure why these cops are so eager to tell Peter about it, if he's a journalist, even though he's said he's not going to write about the deaths. Convenient storytelling, I guess.

Our next character is Jerry Washington, a high-school dropout and South Central gang member who is trying to get out of the game. The big man won’t let him leave, though — in fact, we meet Jerry as he's carrying out a hit on a rival gang leader. This whole part is kind of hyper-violent and unnecessary, but you know, adult fiction. And again, I could do without Pike writing minorities in LA who belong to inner-city gangs as the only native non-whites in his story. Ultimately, Jerry blackmails his boss into letting him walk and takes off for Malibu, where he meets a hot young thing who is up for a little danger and intrigue. This is Susan Darly, and she and Jerry quickly fall in love/like/lust and become each other’s world, like you do in a teenage relationship. But one day, as they're bodysurfing, Susan doesn't come back up, and Jerry can't find her. Eventually he does — on the beach down the opposite end of the current, a way she'd never have been pulled naturally, being respirated by a long-haired woman. And Susan, who wasn't breathing at all, starts again, thank goodness. OR SHOULD WE

Now we meet Julie Moore, a psychology doctorate student who is studying the meaning of near-death experiences. She speaks with an older woman who's had one, and is totally spooked by the clarity and authority the woman evokes in talking about crossing over and reviewing her life as opposed to the more familiar way she speaks on mundane matters. (Everything-old-is-new-again point: the timeline of life as a single viewable document, used in Eternal Enemy and Remember Me 2.) Julie is also spooked when the woman says she has a message specifically for her, about not fearing the end of life. It's so creepy that she leaves the hospital room without asking all of her questions.

As it turns out, there's a doctor in the hospital at the same time who has done a vast amount of research on near-death experiences, and Julie wants to pick his brain. Dr. Lawrence Morray is less than amenable to this at the present moment, but he does invite her to look him up later, at which time he may share his research. So Julie goes home, has a shower, and then has to fend off a home intruder who turns out to be her ex-boyfriend being grossly intrusive. He's supposed to be a creep, so we won't feel bad later when he gets mutilated and killed. Spoilers! But for now he just walks out and leaves a mess.

Meanwhile, Dr. Morray has a late-night appointment assessing the need for heart surgery on one of his patients. They schedule the procedure, and then he goes home to his wife Sara, to whom he feels unusually connected and compelled, if not actually in love. She mentions a young girl almost drowning on the beach and then offers to make dinner for them, and while she does Dr. Morray goes into his office (which is actually a lab) and stares at a wall safe that exhibits signs of life even though he hasn't put anything in there for two months.

We whip back to the Cold One, who considers killing a child to observe its mother's reaction, and then succumbs to a street preacher's saving throw or whatever in an attempt to feel something. (I guess I should mention, too, that outwardly the Cold One looks like an attractive woman, and It seems to know how to interact with unturned humans so as to avoid arousing suspicion that It is not.) Neither of these things has an effect on It (and It actually decides against killing the kid to avoid making a scene), and so It goes to find the man who gave It a ride north and give him a job. It has successfully turned him into ... well, not another Cold One, but certainly an unfeeling monster with inhuman strength and a craving for flesh and blood. It calls the monsters who survive Its turning "bastards" and acknowledges that they will have to be destroyed before It can successfully take the necessary step toward creating the true downfall of humankind.

Back to Peter: he's gotten another call from the creepy guy, who asks to meet him at the museum of natural history. The cops wire him up and set him loose, hoping to catch the monster. At the same time, Julie calls Dr. Morrow’s house and gets Sara, who invites her to drop by that evening. She waits outside for him, and when his car pulls into the garage and immediately back out, she follows it. To the museum, happy accident. But it's not he who gets out — it's Sara, there to work on a drawing. Julie decides to go after her anyway, thinking she might be more accommodating than her husband. But when Peter sees her and starts talking her up, Julie hangs back, intimidated but also somehow instantly attracted to him. She does corner him as he's leaving, and they go for coffee together, and they're more honest with each other about themselves than they've been to anybody else in LA. So we're pretty sure they're going to see each other again.

Jerry, meanwhile, hasn't seen Susan since that day on the beach, when her parents panicked that he was black and kicked him out of the hospital. He tracks her down at her school, but she's so dark and empty and ... well, cold, that he freaks out and bails, straight to the hospital, where he tries to get more information about how she was treated. The doctor who saw her volunteers that she checked out earlier than he would have liked, and that if Jerry wants a more thorough psychological assessment he might consider contacting Julie. After all, Susan did nearly die, and Julie is the expert on such matters.

Right now, though, she's on a date with Peter, which ends up back at his place. She’s totally sprung on him, and Peter likes her just fine, but he can’t stop thinking about Sara even as they’re making out and getting hot and heavy. His roommate walks in and interrupts them half-undressed, which kills the mood, and so Peter goes to check his messages. There’s one from the police detective, letting him know that there’s been another killing — and what ho, it’s Susan Darly’s ex-boyfriend. They’re holding Jerry on suspicion after his storming of the school, though he insists that it was Susan.

Peter realizes that Julie’s mentioned Jerry this evening — he left a message on her machine, worried about Susan. They go back to her apartment and listen to the message, and it doesn’t jibe with what the detective told him. Here they become more honest: Peter tells Julie the truth about his sting operation trying to unearth the mystery killer, and Juile tells the truth about having followed Sara Morray and who she is. Peter wants to talk to Sara himself, and Julie doesn’t really like this but she gives him the number. It’s weird how hard she’s fallen after two dates, right? But Julie insists that there’s something special about Peter, even though Peter thinks of himself as pretty cold and emotionless. Still, he does stay at her place overnight, because desire ≠ love.

The Cold One doesn’t really understand either of these things, but It is checking them out with the street preacher. It has picked up enough cues that he desires It, and so It decides It will try for some kind of feelings or emotions by making sex with him. But then he comes too fast and so It rips his ribs out. No, seriously, It is still trying to figure out whether It can have attachments or feel loss, and figures that if It truly loves the preacher then It will mourn his death. Even if It is responsible. But no — It feels no shame or pain at ruining this man, and walks out to leave him dying painfully on the floor.

*  *  *

And now we jump to a whole new section, to a whole new continent, to a whole new narrator, who I can’t really figure out why he actually belongs in this story. Surely there could have been a more elegant way to describe the ancient demon that awakens from induced slumber to teach the people of Los Angeles where they have come from and how to reach their desired end. Instead, we get him followed by Govinda Sharma, a dam engineer who has forsaken his religion and returned to India after the senseless death of his pregnant-to-term wife and their unborn child. But like ... at least it’s a brown person who isn’t a gangbanger.

Govinda has rediscovered religion, in a way: his company’s runner has introduced him to a Master, a young Jesus-looking mystic who helps him find peace through meditation and specific breathing techniques. It’s making Govinda feel better than he has since burying his wife. So he doesn’t really think twice when the Master summons him with a job: follow Rak, the immortal monster who has awakened and is leaving his cave for the first time in five thousand years.

Rak was accomplished in a technique called Seedling, which uses the sexual chakra of the body to bring about unquestioning obedience in potential followers. Have I mentioned Seedling before? Pike brought it up in some of his other stories, where it was important that someone be hypnotized and acting against their pattern but not necessarily their will. Most specifically, Helen used it in The Immortal. Certain people are born with an ability to tap into it (typically the leaders we see as charismatic and dangerous), but Rak could inflict it without any concern. This ultimately made Rak so dangerous that Krishna (remember him? Sita’s buddy?) had to overpower him with a mystical weapon analogous to an atomic bomb, which blinded him, killed most of his followers, and knocked him out for millennia. But he’s awake now, so obviously is a totally safe person for Govinda to go after.

He doesn’t go alone: he brings the runner and his younger brother with him, so that they can watch Rak in shifts and make sure he doesn’t lose them. But one night they all accidentally fall asleep, and wake up with a cobra sitting on the youngest one’s chest. Govinda tries to get the kid to sit still while he finds a stick to knock the snake away, but the kid panics and grabs at it and it bites him in the hand and the kid dies within moments. I’m not totally sure that’s how cobra venom works? But obviously Govinda isn’t going to sacrifice another child to this jungle — or to Rak’s black magic, sending a snake after them, which is what it feels like here. So he sends the other brother to get help and follows Rak all the way to the Delhi airport, where they both get tickets on the next flight to Los Angeles.

*  *  * 

Back to Juile: she meets Jerry in a coffee shop to talk about Susan. His description is not really precise enough for Julie to figure out what’s wrong, but he doesn’t want the two of them to meet, knowing that something bad will happen to Juile if they do. So he takes off, and then Julie calls her dissertation chair to talk about the issue — and about Peter, who hasn’t called since they did it three days ago. The chair thinks she should call him, and also try to get in touch with Dr. Morray about his research. As doctoral students do, she puts work first — but Dr. Morray is curt and brusque, upset as he is about some journalist in his house.

Yep: Peter called Sara and they’re flirting with each other. She says that she and her husband don’t actually talk; that she didn’t even know about his all-consuming research of years prior until Julie called to see if she could come over. She’s an artist, and she shows Peter her paintings, and this is where Dr. Morray comes in and gets all upset. So she walks Peter out and kisses him goodbye, and like ... gross? Am I a prude to want someone to be faithful and true, close out a relationship before starting another one? This whole thing really annoyed me — and I get it, with Peter and Sara being who they are (we’ll get there), but I don’t have to like it.

We’re back with Jerry as he walks up to Susan’s house. She’s creepy and gross, worse than she was at school, and she won’t give straight answers. No, that’s not it — she gives NOTHING but straight answers, and they’re not answers that make Jerry feel better about how she’s acting. It turns out that when she didn’t get out of the water, it wasn’t an accident: she was PULLED under by the woman who respirated her, and ever since she’s wanted to eat dudes. And yep, she killed her ex-boyfriend, and then she killed her parents, and now she’s going to kill Jerry. His gun does no good; she kicks his hand INTO THE WALL before he can fire it, and then starts to take his pants off with lust in her eyes and blood in her mouth. And this is the last we hear from poor Jerry.

Peter now gets home, and guess who’s there? Julie is showing the roommate some things that Peter knows are IQ tests and mind exercises, and he doesn’t really like this. Which ... I don’t really get Peter’s objection to his slow roommate, whose IQ has been pegged at 60, getting some help from a caring and thoughtful friend. I understand that he doesn’t want his friend to feel ostracized or bad about himself, but this is a sweet and thoughtful woman who has been nothing but good to Peter and his friend. Maybe let her talk to him, work with him, help him step up?

So they talk, Peter apologizes, Julie goes home, and then the creep calls, but Peter isn’t scared this time and doesn’t alert the police. Weird? Instead, he calls the newspaper with a pitch on a possible story: that Dr. Lawrence Morray is somehow connected to the creepy murders. He asks his editor to dig around for information on Dr. and Mrs. Morray — and learns that she is not the doctor’s first wife, as Sara has intimated. Definitely more to investigate.

Meanwhile, Rak and Govinda have landed at LAX. Rak is still in a loincloth, but somehow hypnotizes a college basketball player into giving him a spare set of clothes. Then they take off, walking God knows where. Govinda is careful to keep his distance as they walk from the airport to the beach and then north to Malibu. Yeah, walk — Google Maps says 20 miles. This is a long-ass walk for a thirty-year-old desk jockey, and by the end of it he’s almost hoping for his own snake.

Peter’s story chase has taken him to San Francisco, to the apartment of Dr. Morray’s sister, who has nothing but lovely and wonderful things to say about Larry’s wife. His first wife, that is — they don’t really talk anymore, and so she doesn’t know much about Sara. But Sandy’s death was so tragic, the way she fell off the boat they were using in Mexico and drowned. Peter didn’t know that Dr. Morray was there when she died, and this is suspicious to both him and the editor. He decides to fly to Cedar Rapids, Iowa, to try to meet with a mutual friend of Larry’s and Sandy’s, at the behest of the editor who won’t really tell him why yet.

Julie’s got her own investigation to follow. She hasn’t been able to get in touch with Jerry (wonder why) and so goes to Susan’s house, where she gets the same cold and icky vibe, along with the stench of blood and decay after, what, a week or two of parent and boyfriend carcasses rotting in the house. Julie is smart enough not to go all the way in, and runs away home at her first opportunity, where there’s a message from Sara Morray on her machine. It seems that Sara is intrigued by Julie’s research, and by her husband’s, and since she can’t get him to talk about it she might as well ask the grad student (because that’s all we can talk about, is our research).

Peter makes it all the way to Iowa (nonstop and first-class from SFO to CID, which does not now exist) before he learns just why his editor was so eager for him to be out there. It seems that there is no death certificate for Sandra Morrow, and the journalist’s investigative digging instinct led the editor to learn that she is being kept alive by machines at a clinic an hour out of town. (I’m hoping to learn a little more about Iowa in the comments ... specifically why Peter wouldn’t have been better served just flying to Des Moines. This is your moment, @mildhorror​.) So he goes and poses as Sandra Morrow’s son, and ends up talking with: you got it, Penny Hampton. Remember her? She tells Peter the two words that came out of Sandy’s mouth just weeks ago: child, cold. She also tells him that she’s had asthma since trying to respirate his “mother,” and as repulsed as she is by Sandy she now feels compelled to keep her alive. As though her death will mean Penny’s to come.

There’s a whole chapter about Dr. Morray carrying out his cardiac procedure with the patient from earlier. The guy says he hears music as he’s going under, which ties into Larry’s research about near-death experiences. Ominous? Probably, considering he miscalculates with the balloon angioplasty and ruptures the inferior thyroid vein and kills the dude. He gets home all pissed off to find Julie administering a Rorschach test to Sara, which Dr. Morray thinks is a waste of time. And Julie kind of hopes so, because Sara is freaking her out with non-standard and sociopathic responses. Sara asks Julie not to tell Peter, and before Julie can think too much about this she has to excuse herself and get the hell out. But before she can get too far, Rak steps in front of her car and asks what she was doing in the doctor’s house. Without even thinking about who this giant blind Indian might be or what he is to them, Julie sort of word-vomits all over him and then asks how he knows the Morrays and what he thinks of them, specifically Sara.

“She cold.”

Back in ... I don’t know, Muscatine? Peter is trying to throw his weight around to get Sandra Morrow’s records. He has to call in a favor with his police officer friend, and then it’s partly in Spanish (remember, Mexico) and all in doctor handwriting, but he determines that yes, she drowned thirty years ago and has been on the machines here ever since. But there is a little oddity: she was pregnant when she was admitted to the facility, and she carried to term and delivered nine months to the day after her accident. So now Peter wants to track down the baby and see if that gives him any more info.

Dr. Morray, it turns out, actually was kind of freaked out by the inkblot test, especially since Sara was not blind to Julie’s reaction and now thinks she’s empty. So he goes back to work, of course, and who should show up but Rak. He tells the doctor a story of a young man who would dive to the bottom of a lake using reeds to breathe, and when the other kids got jealous and stole his reeds — his breath — he didn’t die but couldn’t rejoin humanity. Obviously Larry doesn’t know what this means yet, but Rak doesn’t have time to spell it out for him.

In the meantime, the Cold One has figured out what It needs to do to take the next step in monster making. It tells Its bastards to sacrifice themselves making a gory mess in a mall, and then decides to eliminate Julie Moore as she is too close to Peter Jacobs. This bit here feels like it gives away too much too soon, but again, I’m still enjoying the story as it doesn’t totally spell out what’s happening and I can piece it together. So the Cold One goes to Julie’s apartment and finds her ex and his lawyer there waiting for her. And It figures, why the hell does It have to hang around to kill Julie when It could just turn these two into bastards and make them do it? Efficiency!

Obviously Peter hasn’t been able to get the adoption agency to give up its files — he has to call in another favor with his cop buddy. But he learns that there was a girl, adopted by a family, where both parents died and the brother (also adopted) was in a mental institution, but the dad’s sister still lives in Iowa City. He kisses Sandra Morray goodbye before he leaves ... why? Peter doesn’t know, but maybe there’s something to Penny’s previously stated connection with her. And then he goes to the sister’s house, where he learns that the daughter was always kind of off and freaky, even when she was adopted at five days old, even though she was a wonderful artist. The brother had asthma and anxiety and willingly chose to go to the institution when he was 18, and then when the girl was a few months shy of high school graduation both her parents died and she took off for California. Peter doesn’t want to, but he asks if the woman has a picture — and sure enough, this weird artist girl is Sara Morray. Ew, she married her dad!

And now we’re suddenly in the perspective of the police detective, because Pike just can’t fuckin’ help himself. This is another too-gory chapter that serves no purpose except to kill off the bastards and I guess make the book more adult. It seems that there is a group of weirdos literally tearing people apart in the mall, and the detective is needed on the scene. When he gets there, the monsters are barricaded in the sporting goods store, and there’s a trail of gore and viscera leading up to it. Fortunately, there are only two left, but unfortunately they have unlimited hunting ammunition, or however much the store has in stock, which is enough. The detective decides to go in through the air duct, and he manages to take down one of the creatures with a lucky head shot, but the other one blasts him in the shoulder with her shotgun. Yeah, her. Of course it’s Susan Darly, the last monster alive, cold and eager to keep killing. But the detective empties his revolver into her, and finally she stops moving. And that is the end of the mysterious monster killings storyline. Seriously, we never see the detective again.

But now Julie shows up at her place, and her ex is there, and he is determined to get in one last lay before he kills her. I told you this asshole was a gross monster who we wouldn’t be sad to see die. And boy does Julie kill him. She stabs him in the neck with a letter opener, she drops a ten-gallon fishtank on his dick, she hits him in the face with a body powder he’d been allergic to when they were dating, and then she drops a TV on his head, which (back in the day when TVs were heavy as shit) crushes his skull. And then the phone rings, and it’s Sara Morray, and she wants Julie to come over and talk. Obviously, Julie doesn’t want to, but she feels like she HAS to. Seedling!

And also now Peter has gotten an audience with the doctor who was Larry and Sandy’s mutual friend, the reason that Sandra Morray is vegetating in Iowa rather than somewhere closer to her husband. It seems that this guy dated her first, but Larry stole her away and they got married really fast. He’s tried to be happy for them, because she obviously loved him back, but he also knew that Larry had a temper, and in fact he’s pretty sure that’s how the accident happened. That Larry hit Sandy because she was pregnant and refused to get rid of it, and that she got knocked overboard and nearly died. Larry managed to keep her alive until they got to shore and medicine, but there was no way she would ever wake up. Old love and anger bade this doctor to take over Sandy’s care, but because he’s not the legal guardian he couldn’t just end her life, which is why she’s still on machines after thirty years. He did deliver the babies, though, and wants to know what Peter knows about them.

Babies. Plural. Twins. A boy and a girl.

We remember that Peter’s a foster kid. He certainly remembers that. And I don’t begrudge him leaping to conclusions here, considering everything he’s been through with Sara and Sandra and the monster killers and all. But ... are you trying to tell me that there were twin babies placed with an adoption agency at the same time, and the agency has detailed information about what happened to the girl but fuck-all on the boy? Like, nobody even bothered to go, hey detective journalist guys, don’t you want to know about BOTH of Sandra Morray’s coma-born babies? Or maybe, yeah, we have that record on file — which child are you asking about?

*  *  * 

Good building and scaffolding of a premise so far, right? It’s too bad that from here, the narrative kind of dribbles to a halt. And before we can get to the closure of Peter and Sara and Julie and Dr. Morray and everyone else (except the cops, like I mentioned), we have to listen to Govinda dream about the story he was told of Rak’s birth. Basically, his mother was a celibate seer who was raped, and the act implanted in her a monstrous presence that was never wrong. In fact, one of her predictions went so right that the man she was giving it to killed her, pretty much at term. So the dude who raped her cut the baby out  — and it ended up being Rak.

Govinda is still watching him, in a cemetery, digging up a coffin. Govinda’s wife’s coffin. Who then comes to zombie-life and delivers their baby, also dead. Govinda realizes he’s being given a second chance with his god; at least according to this narrative, Hindus must be cremated rather than buried. (Wikipedia says this isn’t always true of every sect, but remember Pike didn’t have Wikipedia in 1994. Besides, even with a burial there are still preparation rites that we can probably assume Govinda didn’t follow, being too distraught to be a good Hindu.) So when his dead wife and son lie back down, he lights them on fire. Is this why he was supposed to be following Rak? He’s not risking it — he leaves the pyre and goes after him.

Now Julie shows up at Sara’s house, and she wants to go for a walk on the beach. Obviously Julie is still under Seedling, because she knows she doesn’t trust this lady but goes with her anyway. And she’s right to distrust, because Sara drags her into the ocean and starts the same transformation she did on Susan Darly.

And even though we know the Cold One is Sara, It still narrates in this way as It makes Its way back to the house. I’ll give this to Pike: he thoroughly commits to the voice. Who should It encounter on the road in front, though, but Rak, who asks to hear Its story. The Cold One tells how It has always had a consciousness beyond Its apparent age and that It followed the instructions of the Voice until it suddenly disappeared. Rak reveals that the Voice is none other than the ghost of the life of Sandra Morrow, causing the Cold One to relive her life up to the point of her death. Which is why It has ended up where It is. It wants to kill Rak and his weird Indian follower, but Rak won’t allow It to touch Govinda and can’t be manipulated by It anyway. This pisses It off — but hey, finally emotions!

It goes inside to find Lawrence Morrow staring at two bottles. One is whiskey, half empty. The other contains a moving fetus — the Cold One’s miscarriage from three years earlier, echoing the miscarriage that Sandra Morrow had three years before her death. And now that It remembers everything from both lives, It wants to make Dr. Morrow hurt the way he hurt Sandra. But because It has emotions and feelings for the first time, It wants to savor them, to drag things out and taunt and scare Larry. So he gets away, with the knowledge that his wife is somehow the comatose vegetable seven states away and the goal of stopping her, with maybe a plan? We don’t know yet.

But Rak and Govinda are still outside, because Govinda doesn’t know if his job is done yet. They walk down to the beach and find the lifeless body of Julie Moore in the surf. Govinda is ready to stop Rak from murdering an innocent, but all Rak does is watch Julie struggle to breathe. Govinda wants to help, but as he’s reaching in her mouth to clear the airway Julie bites off his finger. And now Rak steps in, calmly pushing Julie back to the sand and quieting her. He explains to Govinda that Julie carries a child who is the incarnation of the Hindu death goddess Kali, and that there’s nothing either of them can do  and no rationale to what’s already happened. He takes off, and this time Govinda doesn’t follow, so he’s there when Julie wakes up and can take care of her instead.

Now Peter is stuck in the Denver airport on a layover and is thinking about everything he’s learned. He calls up the ex-girlfriend who bailed on him after her miscarriage, and learns that she was scared of the sensation, not just of miscarrying but also how cold and abnormal the life inside felt. So Peter’s vindicated in his jumping to conclusions, even though he hasn’t read the whole book like I did and couldn’t possibly know everything.

When he gets home, the first thing he does is goes to see Sara, and tells her everything he’s found out. She’s not to be deterred from her plan, though: fuck her brother and make a Cold Baby. If she can’t carry warm life to term and he can’t provide life for a ... I don’t know, “warmie”? Then maybe they should get it on together and allow their cold child to destroy humankind. Before she can torture him into banging her, though, Peter’s roommate shows up, having found the address and directions in the apartment and thinking it was a new place he had to deliver a newspaper. So Sara holds him under in the hot tub until Peter agrees to do what she wants, but it’s too late and the roommate is dead.

Meanwhile, Dr. Morray is flying the other direction, to see his wife for the first time in thirty years. And not just to see her: to cut her life support so she can die with whatever shred of dignity she has left, and so her undead reborn self will also die without ruining the world. Does he sign a medical order of withdrawal of life support? Hell no, he’s too rich and important for that. He sneaks in a scalpel and slices off the air tube, holding Penny Hampton hostage while he does it so nobody will stop him.

And now, with no breath in the warm lungs, the Cold One realizes that It is near Its end. That sentence is a cheat to make it sound more interesting: we’re still in Peter’s POV, as Sara smothers and fades. She tells him what Rak told her: that the first breath is a gift, and it can be given just as a life reaches its end to make more life. So Peter, who has never had anybody except this roommate, realizes that he has a responsibility to let him live. He blows his last breath into the roommate’s lungs and then dies beside his naked sister lover monster.

Epilogue, finally! Three years later, Govinda is back in LA for a meeting and he connects with Julie and her daughter at a playground. The kid sure is creepy and precocious, and doesn’t seem to be hot even though it’s a sweltering day. Maybe he shouldn’t have let Rak save Julie? Too late! To be continued! Only not, and it never was, and now Pike says it never will be!

Like ... what happened to the roommate? What happened to Dr. Morray and Penny Hampton? How is everybody reacting to the deaths of Peter Jacobs and Sara Morray? Has the city recovered from the monstrous killing spree? Does Govinda actually have a reason for being here beyond just telling us what Rak is doing? Where is the actual closure?

I really enjoyed reading The Cold One right up until that fourth section. It spent all of this time building people and monsters and showing how they were related to each other, and then it rushed to the end in less than a quarter of the length, with Peter’s death literally the last thing before the epilogue and no time to react or respond to it. It feels like Pike just had to get through the book to fulfill his contract requirement and didn’t have time to actually finish it, thus the tossed-in promise of The Cold One 2: Seedling at the end. I wish he would have just finished it at the time instead of kicking the can down the road to infinity.

[sonderei]

I got bored and answered one of those 100-questions things so if you ever wanted to know a stupid amount of useless information about me read on, otherwise enjoy whatever content is in the next post!

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify

is your room messy or clean? my room is a mess, the rest of the apartment is pretty clean

what color are your eyes? brown

do you like your name? why? its grown on me. I used to get teased a lot in school “hey Ariel, where’s your best friend Flounder??” but now I work on Disney property and it’s on my name tag so I get to make a lot of kids (and adults) happy

what is your relationship status? been dating a small mess of a person for 4 years, whom I love dearly��

describe your personality in 3 words or less basically a cat

what color hair do you have? brown, or like a really dirty blonde if I spend enough time in the sun

what kind of car do you drive? color? a black 2013 hyundai accent hatchback (named Jazz)

where do you shop? where I shop: target, forever21, H&M, BoxLunch, Garage where I’d LIKE to shop: ModCloth, ASOS

how would you describe your style? I once bought an oversized Polariod windbreaker and I wear it everywhere I can??? I also love passive aggressive crop tops (”no thanks”) I wore it to a mandatory meeting at work at 9am and any time my managers asked me a question I just pointed to my shirt. So idk that should tell you something

favorite social media account I think I enjoy Instagram and Tumblr equally?

what size bed do you have? queen

any siblings? one full brother (5 years younger), one half brother on my dad’s side (13 years younger), and one half sister on my mom’s side (18 years younger). 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? idk because I haven’t traveled anywhere I’d actually like to live. I love the idea of living northwest US (Seattle, Portland) or in NZ or like Scotland or somewhere with beautiful scenery but like...never been so can’t say for sure?

favorite snapchat filter? flower crown

favorite makeup brand(s) NYX is pretty much all I use but I also do like bare minimum with my makeup

how many times a week do you shower? typically every other day unless I’m super gross

favorite tv show? too hard. Steven Universe, Game of Thrones, A:TLA, and Adventure Time?

shoe size? 7-8 depending on who makes them

how tall are you? smol. Like 5′3″ or so? 

sandals or sneakers? sneakers, unless going somewhere involving water and/or sand

do you go to the gym? nah. I’m up and down stairs at least 20 times a day, usually while carrying stuff. that’s my exercise.

describe your dream date sitting in front of the Ocean Voyager exhibit at the Georgia Aquarium all day. like literally that’s it. and my date lets me without asking to move on, and ideally enjoys it as much as I do.

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? uhhh like $25 because that’s how much you have to have to open a new bank account which I’ve been meaning to do for like two weeks now

what color socks are you wearing? not wearing any, but I was wearing shark socks all day

how many pillows do you sleep with? just one, super soft and squishy

do you have a job? what do you do? I'm a server at a restaurant in Disney Springs at Walt Disney World. Its challenging and often frustrating and stressful but I get to meet some really cool people so it evens out. (Pat Sajak from Wheel of Fortune was in last week, I didn’t ask him if I could buy a vowel because I have some dignity)

how many friends do you have? like true friends, would drop everything for me if I asked them / needed them to? I’d say 3. But my social group is like...maybe 10 people? That I actively try to hang out with semi regularly.

whats the worst thing you have ever done? I honestly don’t even know. I forgot a woman’s ketchup last week at work and apparently I ruined her entire Disney vacation so

whats your favorite candle scent? usually anything with jasmine, so long as it isn’t overpowering

3 favorite boy names Nathaniel, Sebastian, Milo 

3 favorite girl names Riley, Maisie, Phoebe

favorite actor? robert downey jr probs

favorite actress? tessa thompson?

who is your celebrity crush? ugh. tom holland, tessa thompson, rdj? 

favorite movie? Spirited Away or Howl’s Moving Castle

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I used to, before I worked at a bookstore. For some reason that killed my love for reading. But favorite books were the Bartimaeus Trilogy and Abarat.

money or brains? brains

do you have a nickname? what is it? Skip (long story short, its a Cabin Pressure reference because I’ve always wanted to be a pilot)

how many times have you been to the hospital? for myself? 5? maybe 6?

top 10 favorite songs in no particular order Evolve by Phoria Put ‘Em Up by Priority Cleopatra by The Lumineers Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man Miracle by CHVRCHES Dissolve by Absofacto Taro by alt-J Lavender by Two Door Cinema Club Dinosaurs by The Maccabees Ambling Alp by Yeasayer

do you take any medications daily? nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) ehh a bit on the oily side

what is your biggest fear? losing the ones I love

how many kids do you want? NONE ZERO NADA ZIP ZILCH FUCK NO

whats your go to hair style? pull it back, messy bun if possible

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) a p small apartment (but not tiny, I think it’s like 800-900 sq ft)

who is your role model? Steve Irwin

what was the last compliment you received? a guest at one of my tables told me I looked like one of the recent Bond girls

what was the last text you sent? bailing on a few friends who were going to Blizzard Beach because I was exhausted from having my dad in town for the last two days so I wanted to sleep

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? like 2 or 3. not very old

what is your dream car? realistic? a nice Subaru or Audi. Maybe a Tesla unrealistic? bugatti veyron

opinion on smoking? cigarettes? ew gross not around me also poor life choices weed? don’t care, just not around me please and thanks my other half is allergic

do you go to college? I did, graduated two years ago, still haven’t done anything with my life / degree

what is your dream job? anything working directly with animals, especially marine mammals, big cats, or non-venomous reptiles

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? big city. right in the middle of it.

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? not usually, I have specific stuff I use for my hair that’s a lot nicer than the stuff at hotels

do you have freckles? not like a ton but yeah

do you smile for pictures? if I feel like it? also depends on who’s taking the picture

how many pictures do you have on your phone? I’d say somewhere in the realm of like 650-800?

have you ever peed in the woods? yep, used to go camping a lot as a kid

do you still watch cartoons? hell yeah, I usually prefer them to anything else. Steven Universe, Adventure Time, Voltron, A:TLA, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends...that shit is my jam

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? mmmm Wendys but I usually don’t get c nugs from anywhere

Favorite dipping sauce? chick fil a sauce or ranch

what do you wear to bed? just underwear

have you ever won a spelling bee? no but I came close in middle school

what are your hobbies? not many tbh. I have a few reptiles that I take care of. I collect / trade Disney pins. I love swimming but don’t do it all that often. Uhhh...seeing how many times I can ride Kilamonjaro Safari in a row before the cast members begin to judge me?

can you draw? not really, no

do you play an instrument? nope, I can’t even read music and I can barely hum

what was the last concert you saw? uhhhh...I think Death Cab for Cutie and CHVRCHES?

tea or coffee? tea

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? Starbucks for drinks, Dunkin for food (donutssssss)

do you want to get married? yeah, eventually. I told the SO that ideally before I’m 30 and that we’re not having a wedding but we’re gonna elope instead because fuck weddings I don’t have the money for that or the patience to plan it

what is your crush’s first and last initial? not really a crush but more of a “current-and-potentially-forever life partner” but DU

are you going to change your last name when you get married? no idea. D wants to change their last name but idk if they’d take mine or they’d just change it to their middle name and then I’d take that? honestly it doesn’t really matter to me each way so long as I don’t get their current last name (because of bad associations)

what color looks best on you? no idea honestly. I prefer dark, muted blues?

do you miss anyone right now? my parents and siblings, and two of my best friends

do you sleep with your door open or closed? open, otherwise the cats would never let us sleep

do you believe in ghosts? nah, not really. I grew up in a town that had a bunch of history and by extension ghost stories, so it was more a part of “tourist culture” than something that seemed legitimate to me

what is your biggest pet peeve? I never know until someone starts doing it around me. but uhhhh I hate loud chewers, people that refuse to even try to see your side of an argument, and when you’re sitting somewhere in public like on a bench or something and there’s plenty of other empty seating options nearby and yet someone comes up and sits RIGHT NEXT TO YOU nope you know what that’s it I fucking hate that and it happens to me all the time at Disney

last person you called` I think my mom?

favorite ice cream flavor? cookies and cream, unless I’m at one of those places where you can basically make your own flavor in which case I will ALWAYS do a rose-infused ice cream with pistachios 

regular oreos or golden oreos? please don’t make me choose

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow!

what shirt are you wearing? not wearing one ;)

what is your phone background? just a basic stock photo of some ferns. kinda boring but I like simple backgrounds

are you outgoing or shy? its pretty even but if I had to say one over the other I’m probably slightly more outgoing than I am shy.

do you like it when people play with your hair? only people I know and allow. don’t just come up and start playing with my hair unless you KNOW that I’d be okay with it

do you like your neighbors? haven’t met them! we moved in like a month ago but we still haven’t seen anyone that lives on our floor

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? if I remember, but honestly I’m really bad about doing it unless I’m in the shower in which case it’s every time I take a shower

have you ever been high? nope

have you ever been drunk? sadly no. I have a ridiculously high natural alcohol tolerance, so I get sick to my stomach before I can even manage tipsy.

last thing you ate? pizzaaaaaaa

favorite lyrics right now idek and that’s a lot of effort so sorry here’s me “free pass” I’m using it on this question next

summer or winter? ugh winter always I can’t stand the heat there’s only so many layers you can take off

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? milk or white. milk for straight eating, white for flavoring other things

favorite month? october

what is your zodiac sign leo!

who was the last person you cried in front of? my significant other