#i take the pill without breaks i have no idea why this is happening but for a swer? not ideal lmao

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

the girl next door 19

Warnings: this fic will include elements, some dark, such as age gap, manipulation, chronic illness, noncon/dubcon, coercion, and other untagged triggers. Please take this into account before proceeding. It is up to curate your online consumption safely.

Summary: A new neighbour moves in and upends your already disarrayed life.

Author’s Note: Please feel free to leave some feedback, reblog, and jump into my asks. I’m always happy to discuss with you and riff on idea. As always, you are cherished and adored! Stay safe, be kind, and treat yourself.

This lewk but silverfox

You stare straight ahead, to humiliated to look at the man next to you. You haven't since you woke up. 

You wallow in confusion, trying to piece together the void in your mind. It's all blank after the shower. No matter how much you try, it just makes your head hurt. 

"You didn't eat much. You feeling okay?" He breaks the silence as he comes in view of the hospital. 

"Yeah, not very hungry," you murmur.  

"You know, I read the insert with the pills, that's one of the side effects. Plus it can really knock you on your butt. Must be what happened last night." 

"Please," you beg; just the mention has you squirming. 

"And fatigue can be a symptom of depression so that might also be why--" 

"I'm sorry," you hide your face in your hands, "I don't remember. I don't want to talk about it." 

"I told you, sweetie," he slows and finds a spot among the lot, "we just slept, alright? I just wanted to keep an eye on you otherwise I would've let you have the bed." 

You curl your fingers and dig them into your eye sockets. He doesn't get it. She doesn't hate him. 

"Please," you sniffle and sit up, "don't tell my mom.' 

"Don't tell--" he hits the button to kill the engine and unbuckles his seat belt, "there's nothing to tell, right?" 

"Yeah, but if... if she thought..." you stammer as you swipe away a glimmer of tears, "she's sick. I don't wanna m-make it worse." 

"Alright, sweetie," he reaches between the seats and squeezes your shoulders, "it can be our little secret." 

You nod a gulp. Your chest racks with the air trapped inside. He lets his hand brush down your arm. 

"Sweetie, it's okay. I'm going to take care of you. You and your mom," he retracts his touch, "now let's go say good morning." 

You undo your belt and get out as he opens the back door. He takes out the balloon and flowers he stopped to pick up on the way. He had you sign the card but your mom will know it wasn't your idea. You're too stupid to think of that. 

You offer to help but he waves you off. You go through the visitor's entrance and up the elevator. He approaches the nurses' station and greets them easily. He makes you feel worse for how sure he is of himself. The world isn't scary to him. The world doesn't mind him being there. 

As you get to your mother's room, you stop short. He nearly collides with your back and he chuckles. 

"Here, honey, you take the flowers," he offers the bouquet, "she's going to love them." 

You turn and take them without argument. They're your only defense. You enter slowly and Steve follows. 

"Morning, honey," he chimes past you, "surprise!" 

"Emf, Steve?" She gurgles as she turns her head one way then the other, "oh, Steve, you're here." 

"Just like we promised," he goes to her and kisses her forehead then gives her the card, tying the balloon to the bed rail. "Brought some flowers." 

"Shouldn't have done all that," she's back to her act, smiling for him as she sits up with an exaggerated effort, "I'll be coming home." 

"I know, just wanted to brighten your day," he shrugs, "we were real worried. Both of us." 

Your mother's eyes skim in your direction and narrow, "she didn't give ya too much trouble, did she?" 

"She's perfect, hon," he assures. "Really, she's been a lot of help. I was in a state and she took good care of me." 

"She did?" She wonders.  

You try not to react. He's lying but you wouldn't want him to tell the truth. You just keep your mouth shut and come forward to offer the flowers. 

"Here," you say, "love you, mom." 

She takes them with a brittle silence then quickly resumes her preening, looking at Steve as she inhales the scent, "oh, so lovely." She lowers them and rests them on her lap, "you didn't happen to bring coffee? I'm dying for a cup." 

"Ah, gee, you know, it slipped my mind," Steve says, "guess there were bigger things." 

"I'll... I'll go to the cafeteria and get some," you offer and feel around your pockets. You forgot your change purse. Shoot. "Erm..." 

"Here," Steve reaches in his back pocket, "it's on me. If you can grab me an orange juice and something for yourself. Thanks, kiddo." 

He hands you a folded twenty from his wallet. You take it reluctantly and glance at your mom. Her eye twitches but she keeps a placid expression. You turn to leave as she quickly forgets you. 

“I missed you so much,” she whines. 

“I know, honey, but we should talk...” 

Those words chase you out the door and prickle the hair along your neck. What are they talking about? He said he wouldn’t tell her. 

You can barely see straight as you walk the halls, losing yourself several times before getting to the elevators. When at last you’ve reached the cafeteria, you struggle to remember what you’re there for. You grab the coffee and an orange juice and pay, keeping the change clutched tight. 

You head back up, lightheaded from the motion of the elevator, and float through the halls, unseen and unbothered by the bodies around you. You feel invisible. Sometimes, you wonder if you’re even a part of the same world. 

You stop outside your mom’s room, the door open. 

“Steve, it’s a lot...” she mutters gloomily. 

“Trust me, Holly, alright?” 

You cough and step through. You put the coffee on the table near your mother’s bed and turn to offer Steve his juice and change. He accepts them as they both stay quiet, almost as if they’re not telling you something. 

“Thanks, kiddo,” he speaks at last and tucks the money away, “you didn’t get anything?” 

“No, it’s okay.” 

You glance at your mother, expecting a gripe. ‘Good you don’t want her spending all your money’. She just reaches for the coffee, a tick in her cheek as she finds no sugar or cream with it. Another mess up.  

“Well, I’ll go get the doctor, have him check you out and see if you’re ready to go,” Steve claps his hands. 

“Sure,” your mother hums and pops the lid off her coffee, “you’re a life saver, honey.” 

- 

Steve drives you and your mother home, a layer of exhaustion settling around all of you. You don’t think your mother got very much sleep at the hospital and your own did little to nip away at your constant sluggishness. Even Steve yawns as he pulls onto the avenue and pulls into your mother’s driveway. 

You get out as he helps your mother from the front seat. You trail them up the porch and skirt around to open the door. Even as you try to be helpful, you feel like you’re in the way. 

Your mother’s hand is shaking pretty bad as Steve gets her into the recliner. You watch from the archway and wring your hands. It feels like forever since you’ve been home. The break in routine has you restless. 

“I’ll stick around for a bit but I got a buddy stopping by later. I’ve been putting it off and he’s starting to get pushy,” he explains, “but you can always call me. Kiddo,” he stands straight, hands on his hips, “you got my number? So you can text.” 

“I don’t have a phone,” you frown. 

“I’ll call ya,” your mother insists over you.  

“Okay, well, I’ll make you something to eat before I head out. Did they give you your meds at the hospital?” He asks. 

You see your mom hesitate. She’s never been one to be coddled. She always told you to back off but with him, she can’t break the facade. Her cheek ticks and she flutters her lashes, her tremour worsening. 

“Oh, Steve, I don’t feel so well. Do you have to go?” She moans. 

“Honey, did you take your meds?” He repeats more firmly. 

“Ugh, yes, okay?” She huffs and drops back on the recliner. “You don’t have to remind me I’m sick.” 

Steve crosses his arms and tilts his head, “I’m making sure you don’t get worse. Don’t talk to me like that.” 

“I’m sorry,” she heaves and hides behind her hand, “I’m so stressed and it’s just... horrible to not be able to stuff on your own.” 

“Doesn’t mean you get to take it out on everyone else,” he reprimands. He sounds mad. You’ve never heard him like that. “Look, I gotta get moving around here. You think about what we talked about.” He turns and winces as he sees you, almost like he forgot you. “Kiddo, why don’t you go chill out? It’s been a long morning.” 

You nod and quickly retreat, thankful for the opportunity to be alone. 

[mayakern]

Why....why are the sweaters 3/4 sleeve??? Personally I would totally get a black sweater (or white tbh) but I can't vibe with a 3/4 sleeve (for a few reasons, mostly various sensory/attention problems) so i was wondering why that choice was made and whether there's any chance of a full length sleeve being made in addition or instead? But also I'm curious as to exactly what kind of fabric it is? Is it an anti-pill material? (Pilling is one of my fabric enemies)

so first off, this as is about the lace collar sweaters that will be hitting the store later this year. you can watch the full video here, but i’m including screenshots as well for those of y’all who don’t want to watch the video.

2nd, i get that everyone has personal preferences, but this was unnecessarily rude. you’re not going to like every decision we make, and that’s OK, but if you’re old enough to use a credit card to buy things online, you’re old enough to realize that product decisions you dislike were not made to personally gall you.

there were a few reasons we chose to do 3/4 sleeves, but the primary reason was that 3/4 sleeves work better for a variety of arm lengths. a 3/4 sleeve will look good whether someone’s arm is shorter or longer than average, whereas a full length sleeve can easily be too long or too short for the person wearing it. we also didn’t want to do short sleeves because at the time the only other shirt we had in production was the wrap top, which has short/cap sleeves.

we do have some full long sleeve shirts/sweaters in planning/in production that we have not shown off yet, but currently we do not have plans to make a long sleeve version of this particular sweater because we have no idea what sales will look like. if these sweaters sell well and there’s considerable customer demand, we’ll consider doing long sleeves. if these sweaters sell poorly they will not be returning to the store, period. we are a small business with limited funds and we cannot throw infinite money at the wall.

last, the fabric composition is 62% polyester, 33% viscose, 5% elastane. we tested a lot of fabrics for this sweater, and this was the only one that felt right. its appropriate thickness (not super thin, but not super thick, so that it can easily be layered under warmer garments or worn solo without causing you to overheat), the cute ribbing, and the texture/feeling (which don’t aggravate my textural sensitivities as an autistic person with very sensitive skin) were all just right.

we’ve also done a number of wash tests and did not encounter any issues with pilling. in general, if you take good care of our garments, that is not going to be an issue from our current manufacturer, who have demonstrated time and again that they prioritize quality labor and material that is made to last. the reason shein products fall apart isn’t because they’re made of polyester: it’s because the sewing is rushed and the fabric fibers are low quality and often have a looser knit or weave, which makes them more prone to damage/falling apart on a structural level.

as for pilling specifically, pilling is actually the fabric breaking. looser weaves/knits are more prone to breakage because they are more open and cheap fabrics are often made of looser weaves, which results in more pilling. but even a high quality material can pill under the right (or wrong) circumstances. when fiber is wet, similar to hair, it is more vulnerable to breakage, and washing machines with agitators (the big thing in the middle of some washers) are really really good at breaking your fibers, thus resulting in more pilling.

anyway tldr the sweaters shouldn’t have any pilling issues if you treat them right and full length sleeves are not likely to happen but are not totally impossible.

[ghoultrifle]

Ghouls at the Airport

To preface these silly hcs I want to say that taking the ghouls through an airport is a life-changing experience, in that it will take 10 years off your life span. It's not for the faint-hearted, but alas here is what happens when the ghouls (the characters, obviously) have to take a plane to their next show!

Also consider this a 100 follower special !! Thanks to everyone who decided I was entertaining enough to follow, I love you all <3

Dew is on a leash. That man simply cannot be trusted not to lurch at strangers or run off when he hears the roar of a plane engine. They found out the hard way on his first tour as a water ghoul. They were on the tarmac, about to board the plane and Dew ran off to cosy up in the engines. The band nearly had to tour without a bassist that year...

(I take absolutely no credit for the idea of ghouls wearing these, whoever said it feel free to credit yourself I'm sorry I can't remember you!) Edit: @jesusbutbetterrr big brain monkey bag thoughts

Aurora gets overstimulated really easily (can you blame her?). Mountain lent her his big ear defenders once and she's been hooked ever since. She claimed the camo defenders as hers, even though they don't sit right on her tiny head, she loves them dearly! Mountain had to buy a new pair, but he doesn't mind. He's happy if his pack are happy.

Aether and Mountain are straight through bag drop, security, the lot. They're old ghouls and have the routine down by now. They know the faster they make it through security, the more time they have to sneak off to the disgusting airport toilets for some even more disgusting airport sex.

Cumulus is already high on half a bottle of sleeping pills. She gets restless on the plane so doses up early on. Unfortunately that means she is completely out of it and has to be guided around entirely by the others. She was once put in charge of Dewdrop's leash and, yet again, they nearly had to tour without a lead guitarist.

Cirrus is basically unconscious for the entire journey through the airport, curled up on a luggage trolley being driven by Dew. Travelling really tires her out and the pack don't want to get on her bad side so they leave her be.

Rain is incredibly spoiled. The whole pack know that if you set him loose on his own to catch a flight, he wouldn't make it past the front doors. He's been coddled by everyone since he was summoned, and he lives for it, he never has to lift a finger. Swiss, ever the gentleman, always carries his bags and holds Rain's shoes when they go through security. It's just an excuse to reenact the slipper scene from Cinderella

Phantom tries to order an insanely expensive Starbucks in the airport (it's just a hot chocolate with a marshmallow, why is it £4?!) but misses them calling his human name "Why would anyone name themselves 'Tom'?"

Swiss has a four-wheeler suitcase. He loves to sit on it and propel himself around like a toddler. In fact, the pack bought him an adult-sized one of these after he kept breaking everyone else's bags:

[skankinator]

Complications Ch. 5

Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw x Fem Reader

18+ MDNI

You pull into the parking lot of the pharmacy and he shuts the car off. You can’t help but feel strange about this whole predicament. The strangest thing is that this man is still here with you after all of tonight’s events. Most guys you’ve met would have been gone as soon as they came.

“You really don’t have to do any of this for me,” you give him another chance to run. “I can take care of this on my own.”

“As I recall you didn’t get into this on your own,” he says suggestively. “We will take care of this together.”

Ugh. Why is he being such a nice guy? It’s kinda of annoying but also kinda hot how much he cares. Either way you need to have a debrief with Stacie without his presence.

“Okay, just wait here I’ll be right back,” you hop out of his Bronco and walk towards the door. You hear another door close and turn to see him following you. “What are you doing?”

“I’m going with you,” he says matter of fact.

“I told you to wait in the car.”

“I don’t want to wait in the car,” he quickly replies.

“Great.”

You walk into the pharmacy and look around for a way to get him away. Then you get an idea that should take him a while. “Could you go get me some pads?” You look at him hoping he will accept.

“What kind?” He says completely unbothered by the request.

“You can pick them out. Oh and some pregnancy tests too. Just incase,” you will say anything to get rid of him now.

“Sure, I’ll meet you at the check out,” he seems to have picked up on your eagerness to leave. He walks off towards the feminine hygiene aisle and you make a break for Stacie.

You find her in the back waiting for you. When she sees you she jumps from her desk and dashes for the counter. It’s been so long since you’ve seen her. Her hair is much shorter than she used to wear it. Her dark curls cut off just above her shoulders.

“You just got to town. What could be the emergency?” She says getting straight to the point. Best friends like you and Stacie are able to go silent for months at a time and pick up right where you left off.

“You will not believe what happened,” you start explaining the events of tonight. Several gasps later you end saying, “so that’s why I need you to be my absolute life saver and get me the magic pill.”

“Absolutely, as long as you tell me more about this man with the magic dick.” She walks away to retrieve the morning after pill. As of right on cue, the said man appears.

He sets down several items including some you had not requested. “Did she say magic dick?” He looks at you confused.

“You’re hearing things,” you dismiss him examining his bounty. “Why did you get Gatorade and…” you shuffle the items taking a closer look, “a thirty-six pack of condoms?” You emphasize the large number.

“Well it’s good to replenish your electrolytes after strenuous activity and you need working condoms.”

You look at him with your mouth hanging open from shock and eyebrows furrowed from confusion. You have literally no words for this man.

Stacie returns with the pill and looks between the two of you. Not sure what to say, she reverts to customer service. “Will this be together or separate?”

“Together,” he says reaching for his wallet.

“No,” you place a hand on his arm stopping him. “I’ll buy my stuff. You can pay for your Gatorade and condoms.”

“It’ll be together,” he says to Stacie again handing her his card.

Stacie looks at you and mouths, ‘free pads bitch’

You roll your eyes and mouth back, ‘I’m not going to take his money’

‘Too bad it’s happening.’ She completes the transaction and hands back his card. “Would you like a receipt?” She says in her best customer service voice with a big smile. The glare you are giving her might actually murder someone.

“No thanks, but you should know I am standing right here.” He says both of you looking at him with blank stares. “Your whole conversation. The one you two just whispered to each other that I completely heard.” You side eye your best friend.

“It’s very rude to eavesdrop,” Stacie reprimands. “It is also very rude for my friend to not introduce us.” She turns the attention to you.

Introduce them. Of course your friend wants to know who the man is that fished a condom out of you. Just introduce them, easy. His name. What is his name? Oh my god what’s his name? You don’t know his name. How could you go this whole night without knowing his name?!

“I’m Bradley,” he says extending his hand.

“Stacie,” she replies shaking his hand. “Y/N could use a lesson in manners among other things.”

You grab the bag of items paid for by Bradley and stick your tongue out at Stacie. “We’re leaving. I’ll call you tomorrow,” you say and walk to the door.

“It’s nice to meet you,” Bradley says before following behind you.

By the time you reach the car, Bradley has caught up and opens the passenger door for you. When you climb in you rummage through the bag for the pill. Bradley starts the car and pulls out of the parking lot heading back to your place.

You read over the package as best you can in the dark. You grab a Gatorade to wash down the pill. You sigh in relief after taking the pill. Problem solved. You continue to sip on the drink realizing you were a bit parched. Plus it is the best flavor of Gatorade: blue.

“I knew you were thirsty,” Bradley smirks.

“Fuck off,” you laugh out rolling your eyes.

[womanexile]

Chole or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

Your hologram stumbled into my apartment

Hands in the hair of somebody in darkness

Named Chloe or Sam or Sophia or Marcus

Medicine-“the boys and the girls are in, I mess around with them and I’m ok with it”

And I just watched it happen

As the decade would play us for fools

And you saw my bones out with somebody new

Who seemed like he would've bullied you in school

And you just watched it happen

Complicated Freak-“she got wrapped up in somebody else”

IION?-“was it over when she laid down on your couch? Was it over when he unbuttoned my blouse?”

This Love-“tossing turning, stuggled through the night with someone new”

Harry might have watched her date other people but he didn’t like it.

Happily-“you don’t understand, what you do to me when you hold his hand”

Just a Little Bit of Your Heart-“I don’t ever ask you where you’ve been and I don’t feel the need to know who your with” “I know I’m not your only but at least I’m one”

Without You (HS unreleased)-“Now you’re with him, I must admit I’m missing, The part of your skin, You always liked me kissing”

Him (HS unreleased)-“I don’t want to hear about him”

Woman-“I’m selfish, I know but I don’t ever want to see you with him” “He’s right where I should, where I should be”

Someday-“and I won’t lie, its hard seeing you with him”

If you wanna break my cold, cold heart

Just say, "I loved you the way that you were"

This could be a reference to Taylor feeling like she has to constantly reinvent herself in order to stay relevant. Him saying ‘I loved you the way that you were’ means that he didn’t need her to stay relevant, he would love anyway.

Lay Down (HS unreleased)-“‘Cause you’re wonderful”

Fool’s Gold-“and in knew that you turned it on for everyone that you met”

Make My Day (HS unreleased)-“I don’t want you perfect, Don’t want you sweet, But you make my day and make my whole week”

If you wanna tear my world apart

Just say you've always wondered

You said some things that I can't unabsorb

You turned me into an idea of sorts

This suggests that he put her up on a pedestal, so that the idea of her was better than she herself was.

Trouble-“if I could have a hundred things, not one of them could compare to you”

You needed me, but you needed drugs more

Question…?-“but you were something, it was one drink after the other”

As It Was-“why are you sitting at home on the floor? What kind of pills are you on?”

Harry has several song on his album about cocaine usage and he did admit to writing some of Fine Line on psychedelic drugs.

And I couldn't watch it happen

I changed into goddesses, villains, and fools

Changed plans and lovers and outfits and rules

Right where you left me-“Trends change, rumors fly through new skies, But l'm right where you left me”

All to outrun my desertion of you

And you just watched it

If the glint in my eye traced the depths of your sigh

Down that passage in time back to the moment

I crashed into you, like so many wrecks do

Too impaired by my youth to know what to do

She analyzes every ‘sigh’ from her partner, strolling down memory lane in search of clues that might explain his departure. Taylor questions whether she appeared ‘too much’ like previous girls (crashed into him), perhaps overly enthusiastic (too impaired by her youth)

So if I sell my apartment

And you have some kids with an internet starlet

The 1-“You meet some woman on the internet and take her home”

Right where you left me-“I’m sure that you got a wife out there, kids and Christmas but I’m unaware”

Will that make your memory fade from this scarlet maroon?

Maroon-“and I wake with your memory over me”

Like it never happened

Could it be enough to just float in your orbit?

Satellite-“I go round and round, satellite”

Can we watch our phantoms like watching wild horses?

Can we watch the ghosts of us with the same reverence, admiration and respect we watch wild horses? Wild horses are beautiful in their wildness, but man always want to tame them. Can we look at them without wanting them to be anything else than exactly what they are?

This Love-“your smile, my ghost, I fell to my knees”

Two Ghosts-“We’re just two ghosts standing in the place of you and me”

…Ready for It?-“but if he’s a ghost, then I can be a phantom”

Cooler in theory, but not if you force it to be

It just didn't happen

The 1-“and if you wanted me, you really should’ve showed”

So if you wanna break my cold, cold heart

Say you loved me

And if you wanna tear my world apart

Say you'll always wonder

'Cause I wonder

Will I always

Will I always wonder?

Without You (HS unreleased)-“I know we’ll move on, As time carries on, I still leave an open door”

The 1-“I persist and resist the temptation to ask you if one thing had been different would everything be different today?”

Cardigan-“I knew you’d haunt all of my what-if?”

Question…?-“does it ever feel like everything just like second best after that meteor strike”

Guilty As Sin?-“they don’t know how you’ve haunted me so stunningly”

Super Pretty(HS unreleased)-“I was waiting here, my love, After all these years, do you think of me, In the way I think of you?

[vi-trying-to-survive]

Always

Anthony Lockwood x f!Reader

Warnings: None, this is just fluff and only fluff 💖💖💖

Summary: Y/N overworks herself trying to solve a case and when Lockwood comes to get her to take a break, she looses consciousness.

A/N: Idk how to feel about this one but I really hope everyone likes it :) 💖💖💖 Also sorry that this fic is a little late :’) 💖💖💖 I’m trying to be faster now :’) 💖💖💖 Hope you guys have a great day :) 💖💖💖

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She blinked her eyes back warily, hearing the door open and close. Someone had come in, and by someone that meant Anthony Lockwood. She rolled her eyes, “I’m fine”. He had been pestering her over and over, but if she left now she’s loose all her progress. Alright, maybe not all, but she was superstitious that way. Work hard and don’t get distracted, the last parting words of her parents. She had been finding that second part harder to follow through as of late. It was hard when your boss, who’s also one of your closest friends, is unnaturally attractive. It was complicated. She actively tried to ignore those feelings, and unfortunately, she also actively failed. Still, it seemed her efforts were not a complete loss, seeing as no one else had noticed the change, so she celebrated her small victory. The group dynamic remained the same and she never had to experience the pain of rejection, comfortable.

“You don’t look fine, just come down and take a break”, she could see him standing behind her chair. He was so near she could hear his soft breathing. In and out.

She rubbed at her eyes. They burned but she turned her face back to the papers sprawled across her desk. She squinted at the tiny letters, “But I’m so close”.

“Just give me 5 more minutes”, she waved a hand, scribbling down something on a loose sheet of paper on her right.

He groaned, “That’s what you said an hour ago”.

She faced him standing from her chair, “Then give me an hour”. He winced at her. Maybe snapping at him was uncalled for, but she ignored the sinking regret that was growing in the pit of her stomach.

“Come on”, he gave her a weak smile, reaching a hand out towards her.

She wanted to take it, still she frowned holding her ground, “No, I think I know-”. She brought a hand to her forehead, forgetting what she was going to say. A pang of lightheadedness washed over her and she could see spots in her vision.

She wasn’t sure what to do. Was this what dying felt like ? She probably wasn’t dying, but how could she have know for sure. She felt frightened “Lockwood, I- I feel dizzy, I-”.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I feel like shit”, she grimaced, rubbing the back of her head. It pounded steadily against her skin, she pressed her lips together tightly. It did nothing. She sighed, pulling the covers up to her neck. If anything at least she was warm. Wait, she was just at her desk, when did she go to sleep ? Why would she go to sleep ?

He smiled softly, “Hey”. Only then did she notice him in the room. He looked tired, more than usual, the bags under his eyes had grown darker and his hair was ruffled. He held a glass of water and a pill in his palms, sitting on the edge of the bed to pass them to her. She accepted them gratefully.

She placed the empty glass on her bedside table, “What happened ?”.

“You fainted, for almost a day”, he took her hand in his, gently rubbing his thumb over the back of her palm.

She was shocked, “I- What ?”. It was never meant to be this bad. She had thought it wouldn’t matter, it was just a meal or two and what was a few nights without sleep ? They had been stressed about this case for far too long. It had made a hole in everyone’s morale, especially his. She wasn’t used to a Lockwood without stupid ideas, and now she could say she didn’t like it. The thought was naive but still, the problem lay with the case, if she could just solve it, things would get back to normal, he would be able to relax again. Somehow she had gone and messed it up again.

She leaned back against the pillows, wishing that she could disappear into them. He turned to look at her, she fixed her eyes on the ceiling, “You overworked yourself too far”.

“You gave us- Gave me quite a scare”, he looked pained. She bit her lip, he seemed worse than he was before. How could she fix this ?

She ran her palms across her face, “I- I’m sorry, it’s just-”.

“I know you almost cracked the case”, he smoothed down her hair that was sticking up. She leaned into his touch, her eyes fluttering shut for just a second.

She felt sorry for causing unnecessary trouble, but her chest tightened, “Yes but it’s just that we really needed this”.

“I just thought if I could just get this right then we’d all be alright”, and she really believed it. In fact she still believed it. She just wanted them to be comfortable and happy. A simple goal but it was panning out to be easier said than done.

“Yes but I care more that you’re alive”, he shifted closer to her. She felt her heart speed up. Finding it difficult to meet his eyes, her eyes traced the walls of her room. He seemed unsatisfied with this, using his hand to guide her face back to his. His brows were furrowed with concern for just a moment, before relaxing.

She was unsure how to respond, “I-”

He gave her a lopsided grin, “And it’s supposed to be me almost dying, not the other way round, so let keep it that way shall we ?”.

She couldn’t help but return his expression , nodding her head, “Yeah”.

They were still for a few minutes. He cleared his throat, like he was suddenly aware of how near they were to each other, moving to slide of the bed. He ran a hand through his hair, “I’ll just leave you to get some rest now”.

She held a hand out, alarmed at the thought of her being alone, of him leaving her, “Wait- Can- Can you stay with me, please ?”. A heat rushed to her face, she knew what this looked like, and it was exactly that. She just hoped that he felt the same as her.

“I- Of course”, his feet had barely touched the ground. He brought himself next to her again, a little stiff but their shoulders were touching. It sent a shot a calming warmth through her, and she let her body relax into his side. She felt herself smile as he readjusted his arm around her shoulder, leaning against her a little too. Glancing over at him, she tried not to move her head too much that he would notice, wondering what he was thinking. If he was thinking the same things as her ? How safe it felt under the covers together ? How they’re legs were entangled with each others in a way that was comforting ? How he was holding her tighter than people who were just friends would ? It made her self-conscious, to some extent, yet she couldn’t wrench herself away, even if she wanted to.

She felt a strange sense of bravery surging through her. She tilted her head towards him, a hand resting on his chest. He twisted himself to her, a brow raised. She held her breath for a moment. “Hey Lockwood, thank you”, lightly pressing her lips against his cheek, before quickly pulling away. Her eyes wide, watching him closely.

He was motionless for a few seconds. She frowned and cursed herself for jumping to conclusions. She thought she had ruined everything. Then he grinned, though his face went red, squeezing her closer to himself, “Always”. She looked away, smiling. If anything, even though she wasn’t able to solve the case, at least she had this, at least she had him.

[dazedloli]

Imjist a parasite without my meds, mwybe I should just bblock everyoenfor a few days until I'm back to beinh okay and normal and nnice and safe to be wround am I even deserving of companu if this is who ireally am without my meds, just a pathetic ggirl crying over the horrible visions of a futurw that'll never happen, goinf numb at the idea of ruining everything, image after image after image after image of suffering and pain and of the worst anyonw could do to me, the worst I could do to tjem.. who even am I, was I lyinh all along, am I kind, am I lovinf am I a good girlfriend if akl I do is break down as soon as I don't have a pill, shoulr I never take them again, jjust so everyone knows who I really am wnd can leave me the way I deserve? I don't bring happiness anuwhere all I do is suck the joy out of any room, liek a black hole my heart shrivels up and sucks into it anythinh that comes in my vicinity, I jjust suck anf suck the life out of my loved ones until they're left with nothng and I cling to tjem until I drive them to insanity and madness and suicide is rjat who I am why does no one see tthat it's who I am, why do peopl care about me, whu does he love me, why was I born? Why would someoen bring a parasite into this world why didn't she abort me like sje wanted to

[catiecat1320]

New Fic!!

This one’s a Secret Santa gift. Their one wish was for angst. A lot of angst.

⚠️Warning for character death!⚠️ It’s not graphic or anything but [redacted] still dies, soooo…

Read below the cut ⬇️

If Shadow had known what would happen, he would’ve never done such a thing. Wouldn’t have ever thought of it— he shouldn’t have thought of it at all, regardless of what happened after.

Perhaps he was a hypocrite.

It was all his fault.

……………………………………………………

……………………………………………………

It was an accident.

Shadow knew this, yet he couldn’t help the blazing fury that buried itself in his gut. Why did Sonic have to be such a moron?! That cocky, blue, son-of-a-bitch hedgehog just had to go around meddling in everyone’s business and ruining everything! 

He… he’d been so close. So close. Then— Chaos, he wished he could just throttle that—

“Shads?”

There was only one person bold enough to call him by a nickname that lame. Shadow growled, hoping that he would go away, but a second later he felt a warm hand on his shoulder. The black hedgehog whipped his head around, crimson eyes piercing emerald, and jerked away. 

“Woah! Geez, take a chill pill.” Sonic huffed, his breath visible in the chill air. “What’s wrong?”

“Gee, I wonder.” Shadow spat, baring his fangs at the hero. “Oh, maybe it’s what happened this morning!”

Sonic reacted with no more than a twitch of his face at the comment, as if it had been nothing important at all. “Dude,” he started, taking another step closer, only to be cut off by Shadow.

“Do NOT ‘dude’ me, faker. Do you even know what you did?”

The confusion that settled on Sonic’s face as he tried to recall told Shadow everything he needed to know. “You don’t. Of course you don’t. What did I expect?”

“Shads—”

“My name is Shadow.”

“Shadow. Look, I… I’m sorry I made you upset—”

“‘Upset’ is an understatement. I hate you with every fiber of my being.” 

Sonic frowned, his fingers doing a nervous tap dance on his elbow. “Okay, why— sorry, what random nerve did I touch this time? What happened?”

“If you don’t know, I can't help you.” Shadow snarled in response. Without another word, he sped off, rocket skates flaring as he slid down the icy hill. He hoped to lose the other hedgehog, but Sonic clearly had other ideas as he gave chase.

Sadly, the blue blur had always been just a little faster than Shadow, as much as he hated to admit it. Sonic eventually caught up in their impromptu race, trying and failing to talk with the sheer speed tearing apart any sound he made. Could he not see that Shadow wanted to be left alone? He was practically pleading to get decked.

A few moments more of this game of cat-and-mouse caused Shadow to snap. Scratch trying to clear his head. Sonic isn’t , nor will be, letting up— that much was clear. Well, fine. He’d share a few choice words with the idiot, since he wanted it sooo badly.

Shadow abruptly turned around, grabbing Sonic by the shoulders and slamming him into the ground. “This is all just a game to you, isn’t it? You think it’s just harmless fun.” He spat, the bitter malice in his voice surprising even himself. “You play the hero and inflate your ego, basking in the limelight and not caring about what you leave behind.”

“What do you mean?” Sonic grunted, flipping Shadow off him and getting up, dodging furious punches.

“You know exactly what I mean. You just don’t care.” Shadow sneered, letting his barriers break. Pent up frustration and disappointment morphed into anger, fueling the fire that now burned openly. His fist caught the hero’s jaw with a crack, causing him to stumble and giving Shadow the opening to kick him firmly in the gut. “People got hurt. Hospitalized. Things were burned, shattered, destroyed in that building, and you turn tail and run off without a second thought. The fastest thing alive can’t be bothered to clean up his own messes, apparently.”

“I… I didn’t know.” Sonic whispered, distraught. He dizzily sidestepped Shadow’s chaos spear. “I was focused on… the badniks—”

“Something you should’ve gotten rid of a long time ago.” Shadow retorted. “But you’re too busy going off on adventures.” Both hedgehogs were out of breath by now, clouds of mist puffing out with every breath. The reasons for both, however, were very different: Sonic had gotten it knocked out of him, figuratively and literally; Shadow had spent all his breath screaming. “I was in that building, Sonic. It nearly came down. But do you care?”

“I—”

“What would make you care? Does someone important to you have to die before you come down Earth? What if… what if it had been Tails, huh? Would you finally realize your stupidity then?” 

That was low. Shadow realized as soon as those words left his mouth— there was nothing that Sonic cared for more than his friends. Not even himself. But he faltered at that, and the black hedgehog took the chance to lunge, the thought disintegrating.

The both of them went tumbling, and Shadow ended up on top, pinning the other firmly to the ground. It was completely unnecessary, anyhow— the “hero” didn’t seem very keen on escaping.

“Next time,” Shadow continued after a moment, his voice low. He glared at Sonic with bloody ruby eyes, hoping that his message would finally get through that thick skull of his. “Remember what’s around you. And when someone gets hurt because of your idiotic actions, make sure it’s you.”

Then he warped away, unaware of the single tear that traced down Sonic’s face, that which was etched with a wounded expression of acknowledgement.

……

Miles away, in a luxurious apartment above the dazzling Club Rouge, Shadow reappeared in a flash of light. What would scare the wits out of most people had become customary in this unconventional household, and the bat barely glanced up from her spot on the couch. “Welcome back, hun. Are you feeling better?”

“No.” Shadow growled, the lingering anger from his fight beginning to wane, leaving just exhaustion. Rouge pursed her lips, looking the scruffed up ultimate lifeform over.

“You ran into Sonic.” She stated, not as a question but as a fact. It wasn’t too hard to guess— after all, there’s no one else that cracked the stoic Shadow— in more ways than one— as much as his archrival.

“He ran into me.” Shadow huffed in response. Rouge shook her head, chuckling to herself.

“I assume you two had another lover’s spat?”

Brilliant crimson glared daggers at Rouge, who was unfazed. “He is NOT my ‘lover!’ I can’t stand him.” 

“Sure thing, hun,” the bat laughed. “So explain why your muzzle suddenly matches your stripes.”

“I… Shut up!” Shadow yelled, his voice cracking. He was in no mood to deal with Rouge’s bullshittery. Storming up to his room and slamming the door, he collapsed beside the bed and buried his face into his arms, breathing heavily.

Why was everything going wrong today?

He didn’t know how long he stayed like that. He might have even fallen asleep at some point— he didn’t know. But he remembers when Rouge knocked on the door and came in (without permission), and sat down beside him.

“Hey. I’m sorry,” she started softly. “Are you feeling alright?”

Shadow lifted his head and shook his hand at her. So-so.

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

He didn’t answer, instead turning away. Rouge sighed. She was hoping he would open up; not that she expected much. She tried a different tactic. “Well, I heard the paper files from the ARK were destroyed today, but they probably had digital or backup ones. That’s what you were looking for, right?”

That caught Shadow’s attention. The hedgehog perked up immediately— because it was. Not that he’d tell anyone (but Rouge was smart enough to know), but he’d been digging through just about everything to find the records from the ARK, a piece of his past, and it just so happened that the building that held them got torn apart. He thought they were gone, but Rouge’s words sparked hope— and regret.

Shadow slumped once more, the harsh words he’d shouted with such misplaced fury earlier grating on his ears. “Rouge, I… I yelled at Sonic. For destroying those. It was an accident— not even his fault! He was trying to help. And I lashed out at him for it… I-I think… I went too far.”

Rouge patted his arm gently. It wasn’t exactly uncommon for Shadow to act without thinking. “It’s alright. I’m sure he’ll understand.”

“Really?” 

“Of course. You know him. Now come on, let’s get started on those files. You can apologize the next time he comes around.”

Shadow nodded. “Okay…Thanks, Rouge.”

“No problem.”

……………………………………………………

“What happened?”

Shadow looked up from the computer quizzically, deep in everything they’d dug out of government files. Rouge stood in the doorway, phone in hand, barely concealed worry written on her face. “Two weeks ago. You… Tails, I’ll call you back.” The bat said, promptly hanging up. She took a breath before continuing. “You came home after fighting with Sonic. Shadow, what happened exactly? What did you say?” 

“Is that really important?” Shadow winced, mentally shoving the resurfacing memory down. “What’s going on?”

“He’s gone off the radar. It’s Christmas Eve, and no one has seen nor heard from him since you—”

Shadow didn’t hear the rest of her sentence. He’d already dashed out, heart pounding, rocket skates leaving a trail of slush in the freshly fallen snow.

……

Rouge frantically pinged Shadow’s communicator, but he didn’t bother to answer— instead turning the thing off— too wrapped up in his thoughts as he sped through crisp, pale scenery. It can’t be that hard to spot a speck of blue against it all, right?

Sonic was known to disappear for days at a time, doing who-knows-what. But two weeks was a record without any word, for as much as Shadow knew, plus the blue hedgehog always returned for special occasions. And what more occasional than a white Christmas? 

There was definitely something going on. Something bad.

Shadow had a sinking feeling that it was caused by himself.

Harsh words reverberated in his skull, his mind having handily retrieved them from the back of his Things To Forget pile. 

Where was that idiot?

……

He must’ve searched through half the country before catching a glimpse of the blue blur trudging through some inconspicuous woods, heading somewhere in deep. Shadow grumbled in annoyance as he changed direction and chased after Sonic. So he was okay, just ignoring all of his friends.

A closer look, however, told a slightly different story. The hero’s lithe frame was marred by neglected scrapes and bruises of unknown origin, and Shadow could see, both from the rise and fall of his chest and the puffs that left his lips, that his breathing was labored. Shadow’s brow furrowed with concern. What happened?

Before the black hedgehog had a chance to call out to him, Sonic slowed, his ears flicking, likely picking up on the sound of snow crunching under metal shoes. Then he turned around.

“Shadow.” 

Shadow decided that he’d prefer one of his nicknames right then. It was unnerving to hear his name, partnered with an uncharacteristically serious expression, come out of Sonic’s mouth. But of course he didn’t say that. “Where have you been?” He asked instead.

“Places. Does it concern you?”

Yeah, this— this whole thing— was unnerving. Shadow couldn’t put his finger on why.  “I… It’s Christmas Eve. You’ve been gone for two weeks. Your friends are looking for you.”

“Oh.” Sonic responded, much less of a reaction than Shadow had been expecting “Tell them I won’t be there. I’ve got things to do.” 

And he ran. The little bitch ran off before Shadow could get another word in, causing him to stiffen in frustration. What—

That’s when it struck him. Sonic was acting just like him. It seemed as if the events from two weeks prior were playing out with them on opposite sides.

In an ironic twist of fate, that left Shadow to play the role of annoying, stubborn pain-in-the-butt.

He groaned and chased after Sonic, hoping to catch up before he lost him.

……

Unfortunately, Sonic quickly outpaced Shadow, who did terribly in this kind of terrain. He ended up stumbling blindly through the woods trying to find his blue rival again. Luckily, the “things'' Sonic had to do weren’t exactly quiet. Horrendous screeching of metal and machinery, punctuated by the sound of an explosion, led Shadow to his destination: an abandoned Eggman base. Sonic had clearly wasted no time tearing through the thing, and Shadow followed the trail of destruction out the other side.

Well, maybe abandoned wasn’t the right word. A hoard of beeping badniks surrounded Sonic, their glowing eyes failing to elicit any fear as the hero stared them down with half-lidded eyes. In the absence of shadow-casting trees, the winter sun highlighted the dark bags upon Sonic’s pale muzzle, along with a fresh scratch that he took no notice of. He readied himself into a fighting stance, waiting. Then the first bot attacked— but not at him.

Shadow jumped, the bolt missing his face by only a millimeter— much too close for comfort. Oh, right. He was in enemy territory. He snapped out of his thoughts and shifted gears, spin-dashing the badnik and landing beside Sonic.

But as they fought, Shadow noticed two things: one, Sonic was slower, his attacks not as effective as they usually were. Although, that wasn’t unexpected— Sonic was observably injured, after all. What both worried and frustrated Shadow was number two: most of the time, the two hedgehogs fought side by side in perfect sync. It was like magic, the way they clicked. But this time…

“Stop trying to protect me,” Shadow growls, ducking as Sonic flipped over his head and stomped on a badnik beside him. “I can handle myself.”

“Sure. Like that bot didn’t almost blow your head off earlier.”

Well, at least he got his sass back, Shadow thought, rolling his eyes. “That was one time. Focus on yourself. You’re hurt.”

“Isn’t that what you wanted?!” Sonic snapped, his voice breaking. “Gods, do you hear yourself?”

Shadow stopped dead, the weight of the remark hitting him like a train. Oh. Oh, Chaos. That’s… He didn’t mean… Had Sonic…? 

Any words he wanted to say stuck in his throat. Amidst the flurry of frantic thoughts came one which was clear as crystal: You caused this. Whatever Sonic’s been doing to himself is because of you.

“Oh Sonic, you’re a terrible hero.” Sonic drawled in a horrible imitation of Shadow’s voice. “Go fuck yourself over more than you already are.” He delivered a swift kick to a motobug and sent it crashing through the last of the badniks. Emerald eyes brimmed with tears, and one escaped, tracing a path down his cheek.

He’s crying. Chaos, he’s crying. Shadow had never seen Sonic cry before. He wanted it to stop.

But Sonic didn’t stop. “Oh, w-wait, you did what I said. Actually, do this instead,” he shakily continued.

“What do you want from me?! What… What more? I… everyone else is clear. I’ve got to be a hero. The hero. The supposed better person. The light in the dark. The beacon of hope. I… I’ve got to be everything. I can’t— I can’t cry. I want to cry. I shouldn’t be crying. Why am I crying?” He rubbed at his eyes furiously, but the tears just came faster, along with his breaths. Eventually he gave up and looked up at Shadow numbly, face flushed and damp. “What… What am I doing wrong?”

Shadow, who had been standing there like an idiot, speechless, finally found his voice. “Sonic…” he whispered, taking a step forward.

That’s as far as he got.

Because then everything collapsed, all too fast; but at the same time, all too slow.

…A badnik. They’d missed one. Or maybe just didn’t smash it hard enough.

With the last of its artificial life, it fired at Shadow, who, mind reeling from Sonic’s mental breakdown, froze on the spot. His mind screamed at his body to move, but he simply could not react fast enough.

The shot didn’t make it to its target, though.

Because Sonic was there instead.

The bolt punched through the hedgehog, somewhere among his ribcage, then out the other side, bringing a burst of bright red, stark against royal blue.

Sonic collapsed to his hands and knees, taking in a single, sharp breath.

Shadow doesn’t remember screaming. 

But he knows he heard it— shocked, terrified, piercing— as he dropped to the ground beside his counterpart. 

No, no, no.

Warm blood ate at crystal white snow, melting it into a sickening slush.

Sonic toppled into Shadow, coughing, droplets of red dripping down his chin.

He weakly grabbed at his chest as Shadow frantically turned him over, exposing the worst of it.

It was a gruesome sight, one indescribable, one his memory blurred out.

…Somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew then that Sonic wouldn’t make it.

In a twisted way, it both calmed him and panicked him.

He peeled off now blood-soaked gloves, fumbling with his communicator before pressing SOS. 

Then he applied pressure to the wound, wincing at Sonic’s pained whimpers.

“Shad… Shadow. Shads.”

Shadow hesitantly looked over. 

Sonic’s usually lively emerald eyes were devoid of the spark that Shadow so liked to see. They’d taken on a dull, glassy look, struggling to focus on Shadow’s face.

“Y-you’re… you’re crying,” he mumbled.

Shadow blinked, processing the remark. “That’s… that’s not important!”

Sonic didn’t seem to hear him. “Hmm… you m’kay?”

The sudden question so clearly contrasted the situation at hand that Shadow could help but choke out a bitter laugh. “What? Y-yes. No. I don’t know any more. Why…That sounds like a question I should be asking you?”

“Mmm… ‘m fine. Always fine.” Sonic replied absently, his head lulling to the side. “Sleepy…”

“No!” Shadow yipped, eliciting a disappointed whine from the injured hero. “No. No, no. Stay awake, Sonic. Th-they’ll be here soon. You’ll… you’ll be okay. Okay.  Please.”

Sonic shook his head lethargically. “Shadow. I… Don’t cry… hate crying.”

“Sonic. T-that’s not important,” Shadow chokes. He opted to let up on the pressure, which was not doing anything to reduce the bloody puddle that formed beneath the two. Instead, he gently gathered the other in his arms, cradling him against his chest like it would fix everything. “I… earlier you asked what I wanted from you. I need you to stay alive. Please, Sonic, please.”

Sonic blinked, slow, deathly. “Sorry. Can’t… can’t do that,” he whispers, pressing against the patch of fluff, and Shadow sobs in protest.

“No no n-no, Sonic, please. Sonic!” 

“Shhh…” Bare paw pads pick up on the sensation of touch, and Shadow realizes that Sonic was grasping his hand. “Shhh… ‘s gonna be okay, Shads. Mhm? ‘Innit funny… this is how— I die… after everything…”

“Y-you’re not going to die, Sonic. You’re not! Sonic, Sonic, Sonic…” Shadow shook him in a desperate attempt to keep him awake. He absently wondered if Sonic could hear his erratic heartbeat as he rambled, straining to pick up on sounds of rescue. 

“Sonic, Sonic, please. They’re coming. Just… just hold on. They’ll help you and you’ll be okay and everything’ll be fine. Sonic. Sonic, I-I’ll take you on a vacation, okay? Anywhere you’d like. As a Christmas present! You deserve it. Okay? Don’t die. Don’t die. Don’t die… Sonic?”

No response.

Shadow looked down in panic to find that Sonic’s eyes had drifted closed, a single teardrop belonging to himself trailing down a blue eyelid. “Sonic! Wake up wake up wake up—”

“Mmph… squishing me…” he weakly mumbled. Shadow had never felt more relief in his life as when Sonic shifted in his arms. 

But that relief was short-lived.

“Shads… don’t blame yourself, m’kay? ‘S not… ‘s not your fault… not— your fault…” Sonic whispers, his words slurring together. He gave Shadow’s hand a light squeeze. Then his head drooped and he exhaled, shallow, content. 

He did not take another breath.

Shadow let out an unholy screech. “S-Sonic! Nononononono Sonic, Sonic y-you’re supposed to be home for Christmas, Sonic, what about your friends?! I… don’t do this to me— please! I’m sorry! Wake up. Please. I need you! I can’t do this again, Sonic. Sonic! I… I love you, Sonic. I love you.” And he did. Shadow confessed, to himself as much as to his lover, something he’d always denied, something which was always true, in a frenzied attempt at the impossible.

It was too late.

Much too late.

On a day that was meant to be joyful, filled with holiday cheer,

A life was lost, and another, shattered beyond repair.

[l1tw1ck]

In Dreams

Al-Haitham is forced to stop doubting the Akademiya

FTM!Al-Haitham x Top!Masc Reader

Request | Kinktober | No AFAB language used

Contains: Non-Con, Psychological Torture, Drugging, Nipple Play + Clamps, Mind Break, Asphyxiation, Mind Manipulation, Overstimulation, Starvation, Hallucinations

Words: 1,200

──────────────────

Al-Haitham started to grow suspicious about what's being taught at the Akademiya, viewing the teachings as propaganda and questioning everything about it.

It's not necessarily incorrect to believe that the Akademiya spreads cultist ideas but having a student be a non-believer could cause the doubts to spread like a virus and ruin the Akademiya.

As one of the sages, you took it upon yourself to make sure one of the best students doesn't go off on the 'wrong' path. In order to do this, you use your special ability to create a dream world in which you aim to make Al-Haitham stop questioning the Akademiya.

Al-Haitham enters the dream on his knees with his hands tied and due to not having a dream since he was a kid, he has no clue of what's happening. He can't move his legs an inch so trying to at least stand up is out of the question. He lowers his head and waits for something to happen.

He raises his head to the sound of footsteps. "You're quite foolish for believing that the Akademiya is wrong, we value honesty and knowledge. We wouldn't dare spread lies." You stand in front of him with your arms crossed.

"So that's what this is about.." Al-Haitham mutters.

"Since you think like this, I need to discipline you." You cut away his clothes, the student unable to fight back at all. He looks at you and down at his body in shock. "We can't let our own students go against us."

Al-Haitham quickly recovers, doubting that you would do anything sexual with him. "Whatever tactic you plan on using is likely ridiculous. There's nothing you can do to stop me from doubting the Akademiya." He glares at you.

"In a situation like this, the mind is much more susceptible to manipulation." You run your hand through his hair. "You won't remember any of this, only the new ideas that have been planted in your brain. You won't know why, but you'll stop doubting us."

He furrows his eyebrows. "A situation like this?" He questions. "That doesn't make sense, what about this is so special?"

Your laugh tells Al-Haitham that you know something he doesn't, mocking him in a way that makes him seethe.

You harness the power of hydro and douse Al-Haitham in water. His body shivers, the sudden cold air in the room making him feel as though he's going to freeze.

Your cold fingers wander along his body, groping his chest and pulling his now hard nipples before putting clamps on them. You take the chain connecting the two clamps and bring him towards you, shoving your fingers into his mouth and forcing him to swallow a pill before you let go.

The effects hit instantly. Al-Haitham's mind and vision goes hazy and a faint buzzing sound bugs the back of his head. He can barely think.

"You will no longer doubt the Akademiya." You say, kneeling down and putting a vibrator on his cold nub, using the advantages of the dream world to create it and keep it there. "You will believe everything we say without question." You turn the vibrator on.

Al-Haitham squirms and moans, barely able to stay upright. "St- hh~ stop-" He's stuck in between being hot and cold, he's freezing but the sensations and pleasure growing from the vibrator does a good job at warming him up.

You wrap a light green collar around his neck, so tight that he gets lightheaded. You bring a hand to his head and cause hallucinations, forcing him to believe he's gone multiple days without food despite it only being a few minutes in the dream.

While he's going through the hallucinations, you repeat more manipulating words to get stuck in his mind. He gets more and more sensitive from the vibrator. You lose count after he comes a 10th time.

"Please...please..ah~" He arches his back, orgasming for the nth time. "Fo- food...please~"

You snap him out of the hallucination, the imaginary starvation sticking with him. He looks up at you with tears in his eyes and red cheeks, silently pleading for mercy.

You push him onto his back and spread his legs. The best way to implant ideas in another person's mind is to make them unable to think of anything else but you and what you're saying.

He sighs in relief when you finally remove the toy. Relief turns to fear when he sees you pull your pants off, instinctively wanting to close his legs even though he's unable to.

"God, you're so wet now." You tease him with your tip, your pre cum adding more wetness to the ocean he has downstairs. You slide into him with extreme ease, filling him up and satisfying the need he never knew existed.

"wha- what do want from me?" Al-Haitham whispers shakily, starting to forget why he's here in the first place.

"Your complete devotion." You grab the clamps on his nipples, pulling and twisting them around. He arches his back, coming from the abuse to his nipples. "You need to stop having doubts." You grab his thighs and start drilling into him.

Al-Haitham breaks out into loud and slutty moans, too fucked up to even try pretending like it's not good. Having you knock the wind out of his lungs with your thrusts makes him even more lightheaded but he never passes out, the dream preventing anything like that from happening.

"Do you still doubt the Akademiya?" You ask. Al-Haitham only moans, not giving you a response. "Answer me." You grab the chain and pull at both of his nipples.

He's looking straight at you but he's out of it, eyesight blurry and his mind completely ruined. "Nn- no~ ah~!"

"You're loyal to the Akademiya then, am I correct?" You keep fucking his brains out with your hand still grabbing the chain.

"Ye- yes~!" His eyes roll back, the constant pulling on his nipples too overwhelming for him.

"You believe everything we say..."

"Wi- withou~ without ques- question~" He finishes.

"Good boy." You grin. "You love having my cock inside you, don't you? So good at following orders just because of how good you feel."

Al-Haitham moans, clenching around you.

You instill more manipulating words into his brain as you get close to an orgasm, rewiring his thoughts before you fill him with your load.

His mind goes blank and he's flashed with a bright light before he wakes up, not remembering the dream at all.

Al-Haitham questions the odd feeling in his front, numbness and some pain as well as the feeling of cum residing inside him. Although even when he stands, nothing comes out.

His fingers graze over his unusually sore nipples and his mind wanders to you, thinking about how it would feel if you touched them.

"What..?" He moves his hands away and covers his mouth, cheeks warm from the weird and uncharacteristically lewd thought.

He doesn't question the fact that he no longer has any problems with the Akademiya, his worship for it seems completely normal to him.

Al-Haitham doesn't know what to do with all the weirdly horny thoughts he has of you though...

[bullet-prooflove]

Hi. This is an ask for Vostanik Sabatino 😍 again. The prompt is: 27. You kept me as your favourite secret. Thank you so much for introducing this man. He looks so delicious in a suit (season 4).

Nik doesn’t realise you’re keeping something from him, not until he opens the cabinet in the bathroom looking for more toothpaste and sees the medicine bottle. His eyebrows furrow into a frown as he studies the label.

He knows what they are, he’s been on them himself a few times on and off over the years. The last time was in Germany.

That was almost two years ago.

He knows you were seeing a counsellor after what happened to you in Afghanistan, you’d suffered nightmares, flashbacks but you were over that hill, he thought. It hurts him to think that you’re still suffering, that you can’t come to him with this.

You’re in the kitchen, putting the plates he’s just washed up away when he sets the pill bottle down on the counter.

“Are you ok?” He asks you, studying the expression on your features.

He sees you withdraw for a moment, your arms crossing over your chest as you lean back against the sink. There’s a moment of indecision on your features and Nik feels an apprehension in his chest because it’s never been more obvious than in this moment how limited his involvement in your life really is.

“PTSD.” You say finally, your palm rubbing over the nape of your neck. “I have PTSD.”

Something inside him breaks because he should know if somethings going on with you, he should have been able to see it. He backtracks over the past couple of months, the video calls, the voice notes, your texts and not once as he registered any sign that things weren’t right in your world.

“I had a handle on it.” You tell him, your gaze turning distance as you look out of the kitchen window. “But then something happened at work, it triggered me. It all came rushing back. I was back in that cave, I couldn’t breathe…”

He reaches for you in that moment because he can’t stand to see you suffer like this. He knows you’re not alone, that you have your team to help you but, in this moment, he wants to be the one to take away that pain. He wants to remind you that he’s here if you need him but the truth is…

He’s not.

He’s away for months at a time, mostly out of contact until he can initiate it.

He understands why you didn’t tell him.

The powerlessness he feels right now, it would have been tenfold with the distance between you. Even now, it rises up in him because he’s due to leave in a couple of days and you’ll still be here trying to deal with this. It feels like he’s abandoning you and Nik, he just can’t do that, not when he knows you’re hurting so badly.

“I don’t want you to hide stuff like this from me.” He whispers into your hairline as he cradles you close. “Even if I’m not here, I want to know what’s going on you. You have no idea how important you are…”

He can’t express how much he means that, how vital you are to his existence. Without you he has no heart, no soul. Already he’s planning how he can extend his stay, he’ll say his contact is being evasive, he needs more time in LA to track him down.

 “We’re going to get through this.” He promises you, his thumb tracing over the back of your neck. ”I’m here for you.”

Love Nik? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Interested in supporting me? Join my Patreon for Bonus Content!

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

@kmc1989 @words-and-seeds

[bandarrrrr]

AM I SLIPPING BACK INTO DEPRESSION?

I don't know if I am or I am not, 1.5 years back when my 11th started I opted for PCM for my 11th &12th because I had a clear vision of what I wanted to be but my parents didn't like the idea of their son being A WAITER IN AN AIRLINES (I wanted to be a flight steward), so I ended up opting for JEE prep, I took admission in a big coaching institute, they somehow convinced me and my parents for me opting for dummy schooling, I feel it was the worst decision of my life. If I had been a regular school going kid and then going to coaching, I feel I wouldn't have slipped into depression, my father used to live in Kolkata, my mother is a teacher, my little sister used to be school going, I used to stay alone at home, I don't know why but I was unable to study then, and then my first test in the coaching came, I felt under prepared and I had a bad breakdown, post the I slowly slipped into depression, not wanting to wake up, not wanting to wake up, being on the verge of breakdown every now and then, skipping classes was just normal for me, I was very frustrated at that point and I even thought of taking my life by jumping of my house but I couldn't gather the courage, I had a lot of support, my parents, friends and the one who truly helped me getting out of that phase, the girl I loved. I somehow got out of that phase but my studies were badly fucked by then but then I entered 12th with the thought of getting back on track but life again started to put boulders in my way, yes this might sound as an excuse to you all for not being good at studies but yes. I got into a bad state of mind, suicidal thoughts were pretty normal for me and I didn't even know the reason for those thoughts, I stopped sharing how I felt with my girl and it caused her to drift away from me, later she told me few things that broke me even further and then in end of August last year we ended up breaking up, I lost the person I truly loved, cared about and was affectionate about. The relationship of nearly 2 years ended. My mental health took a huge toll, I didn't let the people completely know how bad of a state I was in, yes they knew I was fucked but tbh they didn't knew how badly, anxiety attacks became common and I found an escape from those panic attacks-"self harm". Yes I know it is not the best way to cope but it helped me in coping and I was completely fine with seeing myself loose a lot of blood at once, in fact after a point it started to give me joy. I slowly gained a bit of control back but by now everything got pilled up, my studies are truly fucked, I don't know what'll happen now, I am putting my efforts and hoping for the best. These panic attacks are again back and the self harm is back too. Let's see how long can I go without killing myself.

[sapphire-weapon]

Random thought but how good do you think Leon is about practicing safe sex while manwhoring around?

I'm torn because, like, he's very self destructive but he also spends his whole life worrying about infection so... Idk?

Also, do you think he's gotten a vasectomy at any point?

Oh, I think he's very paranoid about being safe -- and I don't think that it's necessarily because of infection reasons (though I'm sure that that's part of it), but more because of pregnancy reasons. He probably can't stand the idea of bringing a child into this world just because of the way he personally views the world and what's happening in it. He also probably can't stand the idea of fathering a child he can't care for.

I imagine that, pre-RE2, settling down and having a family was always the goal for Leon. Hell, he probably wanted to be a dad more than he ever wanted to be a cop -- especially RE2make Leon.

But now? God forbid he ended up with a kid on accident, there's no way in hell he'd ever be able to be an active part of that kid's life in the way that he'd want to be. He's already a deadbeat re: Sherry, and that eats at him enough -- he doesn't need an actual blood child making it even worse. The thought of being that guy who only sees his kid a handful of times a year and consistently misses birthdays and holidays and really only exists as money that gets sent over probably terrifies him.

Especially when you consider that there's a very real, good chance that he'll get killed on a mission or just kill himself and end up leaving that kid entirely fatherless before they're even old enough to drive.

So, I think that Leon is always carrying not just one but two condoms around with him at all times just in case one breaks or he's lucky enough to end up with a girl who wants to go for seconds. I also don't think he has ever even one time trusted the words "I'm on the pill" from literally anyone unless he's actually seen her physically take the thing in front of him.

Of course, the denial of his desire to actually settle down and have a family probably landed him with a breeding/pregnancy kink, and nothing's made him come harder than the very few times he actually got to fuck a woman bareback and finish inside her, but. You know. He's become the master of the "pull out, condom off, finish on the tits/stomach" so... that's... something. I guess.

I don't think he ever made the move to have a vasectomy, just because even vasectomies aren't 100% reliable, and there's still some very small part of him that holds out hope that maybe he actually still might be able to have a family one day. Sure, they're reversible, but why take the risk when he probably already has a low sperm count to begin with by the time he's in his 30s because of all of the shit his body has been exposed to and all of the physical abuse he's taken.

He's probably a lot less paranoid about safety if or when he's with another man, though. Without the risk of dragging a new life into this mess, yeah, I'll bet that self-destructive nature of his comes out right quick and gives far less of a fuck and he mostly bottoms for men anyway.

[aajjks]

NWO!JK

you jump at his loud tone but take the hint and leave. you don’t thank spider-man for saving your life, you don’t thank him guaranteeing your safety. instead, you leave without a word, hit him in the face, and call him a psycho. he knows of your distaste about spider-man but being on the receiving end of your displeasure is a different kind of hurt especially when it’s in person.

why do you always hurt him when all he wants to do is hold you and never let go? he wishes he could rip his mask off and reveal himself, maybe then your judgement would soften and maybe…you’ll finally reciprocate.

once you’re out of sight, jungkook feels his senses going off as if someone is watching him but when he turns around nobody is there. he makes sure to check his surroundings, his senses never lie but after doing a 180 of the area there wasn’t a person in sight.

~🫧

When he watches finds no one there, he decides to go home and his shoulders are completely sulked, his body soaked and bloody as he walks, he doesn’t even feel like swinging with the help of his webs right now.

Why would you do that to him?

Jungkook feels incredibly upset, it’s like his sense of sadness has heightened. Wow, this is really a shitty feeling, it hurts more than when you rejected him.

But nonetheless after he’s done crying in the rain, he makes his way home back to his aunt, she must be worried sick for him.

The wind feels so cold, so harsh as he walks, not in his Spider-Man suit- but just as jungkook, a heartbroken boy.

•••

The Thursday morning, he feels sick- quite literally. Because he’s burning up due to being out in the rain and.. he barely got any sleep last night.

He cried the whole night. It was stupid but yes he did.

Jungkook reluctantly gets up from his bed and decides to go sulk in the shower instead.

Why is he feeling so heartbroken anyways.. it’s okay maybe you were just too shaken up.. but… he just saved you?

Ugh you’ve left him confused.

After getting out of the shower, Jungkook puts his clothes on, maybe taking a shower while having a fever wasn’t the best idea.. but.

“Hey 숙모!” He greets his aunt after getting out of his bedroom, all dressed for college. “Agh I don’t feel too good but- can I have some toast please?”

If he didn’t have to submit the assignment today? He’d skip but unfortunately for him there’s no escape.

“You okay?” His aunt asks and jungkook nods, giving her his bunny smile.

“You came in late last night- looks like the date went well I hope?” Jungkook sneezes.

“Oh you are sick kookie?!”

“It wasn’t a date 숙모.” He reminds her but she just laughs. “Sure.”

He waits for the toast while talking to his aunt and she’s like his happy pill. Instantly making him feel better, so after his breakfast he bids her a goodbye and leaves for college.

Time for him to face you again, this time as your beloved jungkook who has no idea what happened last night and pretend like you didn’t break his heart yet again.

[talesofsonicasura]

Fierce Mergence

An idea that came to me involving the Fierce Deity mask. We all know that there is some kind of entity inside the powerful item which during Majora's Mask and Hyrule Warriors cause the wearer to take its form. However in Breath of the Wild, it was just a mild powerup. (Reminder that it's a Amiibo based item and not actually canon.)

I can only suspect that after sometime between Hyrule Warriors and Breath of the Wild, the Fierce Deity entered a catatonic state or hibernation. Here's some important info to know about complete sensory deprivation. It can be used as a form of therapy but only for short amount of time. Too much will cause serious psychological effects on someone such as dementia (which can explain any possible memory loss).

You see the brain breaks down rational thought structures to minimize stress which however results in a psychotic breakdown afterwards. Imagine being trapped for so long without those vital senses? God or not, that is true hell to even the Fierce Deity.

Hence the catatonic state, his power locking his conscience away cause I'm pretty sure no one wants to see what happens when a god has a psychotic breakdown. That's my theory for why the mask doesn't act the same.

Now for to the actual topic here. What if the Fierce Deity fully fused with the current wearer? I don't mean like possessive type fusion but a purer version. Where two people fully become one: mind, body and soul. The entity wanting to escape their hellish imprisonment at any cost.

Two characters that come to mind is Breath of the Wild Link (Wild in Linked Universe terms) and Majora's Mask Link (Mask/Time in Linked Universe terms). Now if you guys are fans of the Fierce Dadity trope... here's a way to make it sad.

Fierce (or Valion as I prefer to call him) performing such a fusion to save his current wielder especially if that Link is a son in the god's eyes. Most of Link's being is front and center but everything that is Valion becomes consumed. Godhood's already a tough pill to swallow but when it costs your father...

Yeah, neither Mask/Time or Wild are gonna be okay for awhile especially the latter when you look at BOTW. If you don't want to go for the Fierce Dadity route like this but still want to use such an idea then here's a fun twist.

Mask/Time becoming the Fierce Deity thanks to over usage of the mask. It becomes harder and harder to take it off. Whenever it is removed, there are lasting changes such as increase in height, hair beginning to whiten and eyes losing their natural features.

For Wild, this comes from the constant upgrades given by the Great Fairies. The Fierce Deity Mask subtle gaining enough power alongside Valion gaining just a bit of conscious to perform a fusion. An unexpected change as Wild just wanted to wear his new outfit more, not become a God of Battle.

The Fierce Deity does want a chance to live again even if he's just an echo or hidden conscious. Reason why he does this to these Links is because of who they are as a person. Neither of them would use such power for personal gain but to genuinely help others.

Some folks in the fandom see Fierce Deity as a war god so there are important aspects that must be known. War isn't always started just for the hell of it. It is often for the sake of others whether the intentions are good or bad. War has its own heroes: soldiers, medics, to even the citizens themselves.

Hope, pain, sorrow, faith, joy, grief and rage are also emotions connected to this very concept. Both Links embody nearly all of this so they are perfect candidates in Valion's eyes. The Deity's seat is now empty so someone should take his place. And if that successor takes on a child, it just makes things better cause they now have a reason to avoid the same fate.

That's all I have for now. Until next time folks, I'll see you back in Hyrule.

Edit: I forgot to add that you guys can try your hand at this concept! I don't really mind at all as I'm curious about what people can come up with. 😀

[razieltwelve]

Solidity (Final Rose AU)

A followup to Stress Relief.

X X X

"I can make my clones solid now."

Weiss blinked. "Solid? Couldn't you already do that?"

Blake tugged Weiss onto her lap and whispered into her ear. "I can make them solid for longer periods of time... and they won't break apart if they... over-exert themselves."

Weiss's eyes widened. "Then...?"

Blake pressed a kiss to Weiss's neck. "Ruby and Yang are going to be out all day. I could show you... if you want."

Weiss took a moment to consider the possibilities. She wouldn't deny that her relationship with Blake had led to her developing more of an open mind about certain matters. And as much as she enjoyed physical intimacy with Blake, the idea of physical intimacy with two... or even three Blakes was certainly very tempting. In fact, hadn't there been a scene like that in the book Blake had asked her to read last week?

"I... yes." Weiss nodded. "That would be lovely."

X X X

Vanille sighed and reached over to grab some papers off her desk. Rolling them into a makeshift club, she whacked Blake over the back of the head.

"Agh!" Blake clutched at her head. "Why?"

"What did we learn about clones?" Vanille asked.

Blake rubbed the back of her head. "That creating more stable clones results in much more... intense sensory feedback."

"Yes. So what happens if you use a bunch of clones to go to town on Weiss?"

Weiss was covering her face with her hands.

"I... uh..."

"You have a seizure and pass out." Vanille whacked Blake over the head again. "Didn't I tell you to test it properly before using your Semblance for sexy times? Good grief. It's a miracle you didn't melt your brain. Can you imagine what I'd have to tell your parents? I'm sorry, your daughter's brain melted because she decided to use a bunch of clones to have sex with her girlfriend without checking if the sensory feedback would overload her brain."

"..." Blake's eye twitched. "Why doesn't this happen with combat?"

"Mental filters," Vanille replied. "You instinctive use them in combat to prevent things like pain from your clones overwhelming you. You weren't using them with Weiss because the whole time your mind was telling you to focus on the sensations as much as possible. You didn't want to miss a single thing, so you didn't."

"..."

"On the upside, your brain scans came back clean. No permanent damage. In fact, I can already see signs of increased development in the parts of your brain associated with multi-tasking. Give it another month or two, and you should be able to handle this just fine."

"So... sex with Weiss using clones will be okay?" Blake asked.

"Yes. But for fuck's sake, start off with less clones and work your way up. Also, keep these with you." Vanille gave Blake a bottle of pills. "They're similar to what people with telepathic Semblances take. They'll forcefully suppress excess brain activity. Take two if you start having a seizure."

X X X

Author's Notes

Vanille is arguably the smartest person on the planet. This is the crap she has to deal with. On the upside, she does find it pretty amusing, and it is more data about how Semblances affect the brains of their bearers.

[madamlaydebug]

The more you EAT, the more you AGE!

🍽 Most people have never gone more than a few days without eating for their entire lives

🚘 Imagine running a car all day, everyday for years without changing the oil.

💥 The car is gonna burnout!

👤 The same goes with a body that never gets a break from digesting food all the time! You’re putting wear and tear on yourself!

💩The car engine is your digestive and eliminative organs, fasting is the oil.

🛠 Digestion takes up to 80% of the body’s energy. It is either digesting or repairing.

🚫 It can’t do both at the same time.

🔑 This is why FASTING is the FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH!

⚡️When we fast the body can finally focus its energy on cleansing, reparing, and regenerating itself!

👵🏼 Instead of reversing the aging process through fasting, most people try to cover it up with creams, shots, injections, surgeries, pills, & make-up.

🌱 Truth is, you don’t need any of that to feel young, look young, & stay young. You also don’t need anywhere near as much food as you’ve been led to believe! A matter of fact they only contribute to more harm, aging, & toxicity.

🌴 Nature provides all that we need.

💧Give your body a break and change the oil aka FAST.

Written by: Matt Fu

A little bit about my personal path of detoxing...

Fasting is my JAM! Ever since I have developed the idea of "mind over matter" with feeling hunger and eating....a great sense of empowerment developed within my stages of enlightenment. The body can sustain itself with no food and even no water for a significant amount of time. We have been tricked by the people who own the consumer market that we are to eat three meals a day plus snacks. That is WAY WAY too much food. Breakfast is NOT the most important meal of the day. Breakfast for me, is the space to continue the fasting process from sleep so that my organs can kick back into gear without having to immediately begin digesting food. I have more energy now that I eat way less and fast. It didn't happen over night though. I had to retrain my system to not be dependent upon the food cycle it was use to. Self love is body love... the temple that houses our consciousness, controls our emotions when we aren't empowered to be a co-creator. Having the unified relationship with the body is working with GOD!