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#if someone calls this abusive i'm ready to fight
klemen-tine · 2 months
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Blowing Raspberries
Batfam x Male!Reader Platonic
@jaythes1mp Sorry this took so long and is not all in one part! But here is the first half.
TW: Break in, Child Abuse (not the Batfam), and neglect
Publicly, Richard ‘Dick’ Grayson is the oldest Wayne sibling. Taken in by Bruce Wayne at 8-years-old, he is the first child and the oldest. In the eyes of the law and adoption papers. In the eyes of the Wayne family however, the oldest sibling title belongs to Y/N L/N. Similar to the Drakes, the L/N’s live on the other side of the Waynes, and similar to Tim, Y/N had been left home alone… a lot. 
Which meant he was over, a lot. So much so, he had his own room, Alfred made him a plate for every meal, and he was aware of their little nightly activities. Y/N L/N was a needed normalcy within the Manor, reminding them that there is more to life outside of crime fighting. 
“Did you see that new cafe?” Y/N asked, looking into Dick’s exhausted eyes while resting his chest against Jason’s head. Dick shook his head, “No. Why?” Y/N pouted, “Because you guys literally broke their windows last night.” Jason winced, remembering the shattering of glass and wide-eyed stares as he handled some thugs. 
“Please tell me that isn’t the cafe you wanted to go to today.” Dick buried his head in his hands and begged every deity that it was not that cafe. Y/N has been talking about it for weeks and finally found a time where all their schedules aligned so they could do it. 
“It was.” Jason and Dick groaned while Y/N stared at them with an annoyed expression. His arms that were wrapped around Jason tightened in a mocking chokehold, knowing that if Jason wanted to he could easily get out and have Y/N pinned. Dick groaned again, “Is… is there somewhere else you want to try?” 
“Not really.” ‘Fuck!’ Jason and Dick stared at one another, trying to figure out a way to still have this day with Y/N. If they don’t hurry, the vultures will swoop in and suggest something that will catch Y/N’s attention and– 
“Y/N, how about we got to the petting zoo.” 
“Dami!” 
“Buzz off short stack!” Y/N thumped Jason’s head with his chin, “Don’t talk to Dami like that.” The youngest Wayne smiled victoriously while his two older brothers glared at him. Dick looked offended and Jason was actually ready to strangle him. Y/N shook his head, “Dami, aren’t we going on Friday? I’m picking you up from school to go.” Damian scrunched his nose, “We can go twice.” 
Y/N couldn’t help but to chuckle, “Hmmm, those rabbits are cute.” Jason’s grip tightened, “The new bookstore in downtown! There’s a new bookstore that is supposed to have a cafe attached to it.” Damian scowled at Dick perked up, “Yeah, I forgot about that.” Y/N hummed, staring at Jason in concern, “Jay, you hate downtown.” It’s full of rich snobs and people who have nothing better to do than walk the streets in designer clothing. 
Jason made a face, “It’s our day with you, I’m fine with it as long as you’re there.” Dick gagged and Damian looked ready to chuck a knife at him. Y/N blinked at the younger man in shock before laughing, “That’s cute, okay. Let’s go there then.” He released Jason from his hold, unwrapping his arms from Jason’s neck and standing tall. Dick smiled at Y/N, who was talking to a pouting Damian and ruffling slicked back hair. 
“Alright, Y/N, I'm assuming you’re ready.” Unlike the Wayne brothers who had a father that did not care why they landed on the NEWS or magazine as long as they didn’t kill anyone, Y/N’s father was different. For someone who was always gone, he had a firm hold and opinions on Y/N’s life. 
Bruce may not care that his kids go out looking like they haven’t showered in three days, but Y/N’s dad has ordered the maids to get rid of all the ripped jeans Y/N had because the paparazzi made an opinion on them when Y/N wore them. Jason remembers listening in on that call, and numerous other calls from Mr. L/N, as he hollered at his child he did not care about. 
“You are a L/N! If you still want that last name then you will dress like a L/N!”
Unlike Dick and Jason who are dressed in jeans, Y/N is dressed in slacks and a nice polo shirt. His hair was clean and styled and the shoes he wore still shined. The aesthetic is called ‘old money’ and boy did Y/N have that. He and the Wayne siblings have become the newest trend setters in Gotham. 
Whenever the paparazzi caught them together it was always Old Gotham vs New Gotham. Slacks vs Jeans. Hair combed vs natural. Clean vs Rugged. L/N vs Wayne. 
They were the topic whenever they were out together, which was a lot. The only reason Mr. L/N hasn’t said anything is probably because Bruce is keeping his mouth shut about the child-neglect and abandonment. Point is, seeing the Wayne kids and L/N son together wasn’t odd, in fact there were jokes of Bruce Wayne adopting him, but they still always turned heads. 
“Y/N, I am telling you that is a horrible choice and you’re not gonna like it.” Said young man raised an eyebrow at Jason and tutted disappointedly, “Jay, you haven’t even read it.” The guy motioned at the cover, “Look at it! Dick! Come ‘ere and look at it!” The other made only a side glance at it and sighed, “Y/N… this is only going to lead to problems.” 
“It is literally a book about romance.” Jason screwed up his face, like someone had shoved a lemon down his throat, “But like… young adult romance. Read the classics.” 
“I have read the classics. You have read me the classics. I read them in class and if I have to read how Ms. Elizabeth Barnett falls in love with Mr. Darcy one more time I’m actually going to throw myself in traffic.” Dick agreed with Y/N on that, remembering all the time he had to read the damn book. 
“It's Elizabeth Bennett.” 
“Jay, I swear to God.” 
“Are you sure you read them because there’s no way someone who’s read them would get that name wrong.” 
“Little wing–” 
“–Dickie, maybe. But not anybody else.” 
“–Excuse you.” Y/N snorted at the now bickering brothers, watching in amusement as Dick pulled Jason’s ear and Jason to Dick’s hair. Sighing, Y/N stepped between the two. Y/N L/N is possibly the only person, other than Alfred, who would dare do such a thing. Fear was absent on his face as he calmly walked into the dog fight, and helped release their bites with gentle tugs and stern words. 
“Enough. The line is picking up at the cafe, so let's checkout and head over.” Y/N is the person who quells the fights and mends the bonds. The only person in the Manor that knew how to communicate their feelings and help others realize and communicate theirs. 
He is the kind, patient, and understanding older brother of the Batfam. Always paying attention to other’s needs and always willing to listen to someone vent their frustrations and offer sound advice. Y/N is –
“–And what about the company?! How come the sales are low this month?” 
“Father, they are riding average, it’s just the last month was a boom because–” 
“I don’t care about last month! Why are the sales low this month?!” 
– not Bruce Wayne’s ward, and therefore there isn’t much he can say in this scenario. Bruce listened and watched  Y/N slouch as Mr. L/N continued to scream and berate him from across the world. He watched the exhaustion take over Y/N’s features and the way his forehead creased, Bruce knows that a headache is now present. 
“If you still want the company then you better act like it! Enough of prancing around like the money you spend is yours!” Y/N is grateful his father hung up after that, because Y/N had a clapback to that and he’s sure his father would fly back from wherever he is just to smack him around for saying it. 
Setting his phone down on the coffee table, the weight of the conversation making his shoulders sag and melt into the armchair with a huff. Bruce chuckled at the pout, “For what it is worth, fluctuating prices are normal in businesses. As long as it doesn’t go too low, you are fine.” Y/N smiled at the man, fixing his posture and picking up the mug of coffee. 
“You heard all of that?” The man can still remember when he first met Y/N. The property alarm was triggered, and when Bruce and Alfred went out to investigate, an 8-year-old Y/N was there, his hands holding the wild raspberries and his cheeks stuffed like a chipmunk. 
He huffed at the memory, making Y/N give him a weird look. Bruce had been grateful to Y/N’s impromptu trespassing, because when Dick came into his care, a now 10-year-old Y/N had welcomed the traumatized and blubbering 8-year-old. Something Bruce had little to no idea how to handle. 
Then Jason came and that was a wild ride, followed by Steph, then Tim, and now Damian. That's just the Robins. It doesn’t include the others that have become family but never took the Robin mantle. Y/N had been there through it all, and welcomed each one with a smile and open arms. At the same time giving Bruce a raised eyebrow and icy glare that screamed, ‘Really? Another child?’ 
Y/N never faulted Bruce for his lack of communication, but he did let the man know repeatedly that while words may start fires, they can also put them out. Y/N had laid it on him one time, after a particular nasty fight with Dick and Jason. 
“For a man who loves using his vocabulary to start arguments you sure don’t have the vocabulary to fix them. What are you, a toddler?” 
Mending things with Y/N is always easy, because Y/N does not hold grudges. Not to mention having the emotional intelligence of a therapist, Y/N was always in-tuned to his emotions and whether he was projecting or not. Or if anyone else was. Living in a manor filled with people who have traumatic backstories and skeletons in the closets, Y/N has become the voice of reason and unbiased opinions. Similar to Alfred, just without the sass. 
“Do you still like raspberries?” Bruce asked, and Y/N nodded, “You ask this every time a celebration of some sort comes up and the answer is always the same. Yes, I still love raspberries.” Y/N had once confided to Bruce, over a glass of wine, how he had asked his father if he could paint the bookshelves in his room. Little did Mr. L/N know that the color would be burgundy, the closest color to a raspberry he could get without poking someone’s eye out, and when his father found out he had the bookshelves removed and set ablaze. 
Y/N got his ass handed to him when Mr. L/N came back from his trip, and was then prohibited from decorating his room without prior approval of design and permission. 
Bruce had the bookshelves in Y/N’s room in the manor painted burgundy, and when Y/N saw them, it was like watching a child be told that they were not the bad child. The relief and the path to healing across his face as he took in the bookshelves.
The man watched Y/N sip his cup of coffee, watching how exhaustion seemed to seep off of him like cologne and fill the air with his tired and somewhat annoyed state. Phone calls from Mr. L/N we’re never received well by anybody, and Jason and Tim have more than once thought about sending the hateful man a few messages. Damian offered to ambush him when he came home. 
Y/N quickly shot those down.
Tim came from nowhere, his face screwed tight and body tense. Y/N gave him a once over, before making space for the college student on the couch. He gave him a worried look-over, “Is everything alright?” Tim melted into Y/N’s side, huffing and grumbling about something. 
Bruce’s phone vibrated, and it was a message from Tim sent before he got down here. 
‘It’s in Cabo.’ Bruce huffed, already knowing that if Tim was listening then so was everyone else. Referring to Mr. L/N as an ‘it’ seemed to be everyone’s favorite pastime. Everyone but Y/N’s, but as long as it wasn’t said around him then it was fine. 
“You’re going to the Gala, right?” Tim asked and Y/N nodded, “Of course, when have I ever missed one?” Tim continued to grumble a bit, but relaxed into Y/N’s side as he ran his fingers through Tim’s messy hair. God he loves it when Y/N does this. There was barely anything better than Y/N’s head massages, easily lulling him to a calm state as everyone mentally prepared for the Gala tonight. 
When Y/N had turned 13, that is when he started showing up to the Galas representing L/N Industries, and he would be in Bruce’s care while there. Whoever Bruce met, Y/N was expected to make a great impression. Bruce never missed the way Y/N would sometimes stare at the Wayne kids in jealousy as they got to do whatever they want, while he is forced to be an adult and try to win other adults over. 
Then forced to be yelled at afterwards by his father on the phone afterwards for something miniscule. Either someone commented on a piece of clothing, or how he wasn’t smiling, anything that was negative Y/N got yelled at for. It was like Mr. L/N didn’t know how to do anything else other than yell at his child. 
Tim took no offense when the fingers in his hair stopped moving, and Y/N’s body became limp. The other was knocked out on the couch, napping away the stress and enjoying the weekend. Unlike Tim who had Bruce’s help when managing Wayne Enterprises, Y/N is all on his own. Learning from his dad’s assistant, and also Bruce’s, Y/N was basically alone when his father had forced him to take the mantle. In face only, because as far as Mr. L/N was concerned, the company’s profit was still his profit. None of it going to Y/N, except as a monthly allowance. 
Jason had once said he should just stop managing the company, and if his father loved it enough, then he’ll take over. Y/N chuckled-the bags under his eyes were deep and he had just gotten over a stress cold- and he said that although his father may care a lot about the profit, it was his late mother’s company and he wouldn’t want to embarrass her soul by purposefully failing. 
However, now all that company did was cause him stress and make him sick more frequently. Bruce had said it was probably stress from his father, and not so much the company, but that didn’t stop them all from wishing the company would just go away. 
Tim looked up Y/N through his eyelashes, taking in the similar dark circles they both shared and how Y/N looks paler than usual, and he knows that Y/N’s health would only get worse if they targeted the company. His oldest brother would do everything in his power to keep the company afloat, and it would be devastating on both sides. Y/N would run himself ragged trying to keep it alive and that would mean less time with them. 
“Let him rest, Tim. He needs it.” Everyone has asked Bruce if he plans to do something. However, there isn’t much Bruce can do now that Y/N is an adult. He’s offered a room in a manor for Y/N to stay at forever, but Y/N has always been a bit hesitant about leaving the L/N’s home. Bruce can understand why. 
Aged blue eyes observed the steady rise and fall of Y/N’s chest, and he wondered if there was anything that could convince Y/N to stay here. 
++++
“Mr. L/N, what a surprise.” A surprise it is too, because instead of Y/N being here, it is his father. The one who was in Cabo earlier today. The man smiled, looking nothing like Y/N’s, and he held out a hand, “It has been a while. I figured it was time to show my face and give my son a rest.” Dick stared at Mr. L/N in shock and weariness, not liking how he said ‘his son.’ If it was a jab at Bruce, it didn’t land. Brucie Wayne, the social bug he was, laughed and clapped his hand on Mr. L/N’s shoulder. 
“Is Y/N not showing up?” The man’s eyebrow twitched, “No, unfortunately he felt under the weather so he’s taking a break.” Dick’s eyes narrowed, and Bruce’s smile faltered, “Is that so? How unfortunate, he’s fun to talk to.” Mr. L/N’s smile tightened, “Indeed.” 
The Gala was tense, at least it was for the Wayne family, because Y/N never misses a Gala. Never. Dick saved a slice of raspberry cheesecake, for when Y/N comes over tomorrow. He’s going to be upset that he missed a fresh slice, but knowing Y/N, he’ll worry about missing the Gala. The cheesecake will act as reassurance that no one is mad. They just had to wait until tomorrow, when Y/N will show up. 
Only he didn’t. Dick can’t remember the last time he hasn’t seen Y/N in a 24-hour period, but he does know that he didn’t like it. Almost like there was a force keeping his shoulders tight and chest heavy. Looking around, he could already see the effects it was having on others. 
He didn’t answer his phone, and when they called the L/N Manor, it was one of the maids picking up and stating that Y/N was either out, sleeping, or feeling under the weather. Which doesn’t make sense because when Y/N is sick, he is always over at the Wayne manor. No one makes a better chicken noodle soup than Alfred. 
They let it go. Maybe Y/N wants to be home because his dad is home? 
Then the next day, there was still no Y/N. Not a text message, not a phone call, complete radio silence. Following radio silence while on patrol, radio silence from Y/N had to be one of the more terrifying forms of silence. 
There was nothing. His father left late last night, and usually that would mean Y/N would be over. He would be over complaining about his dad and how he needs to work harder. He’d get a stress cold that would last for two days before he would be back to normal.
Every phone call, every text message going unanswered. 
‘Y/N, I swear I’m about to break into your house. Please answer.’ The threat was real and Dick meant every word. He’s talked Jason, Damian, and surprisingly Tim from doing it but now four days of radio silence was enough to make even Bruce stir-crazy. Batman has become a little more violent throughout the week, and Bruce Wayne a little more stressed looking. 
‘Hey! Sorry for the silence, I’m just not feeling too well. I’ll see you in another few days.’ Everyone read the text message, and everyone’s mind filled with the same idea. 
“Honestly, with how often he’s with us you’d think he knows better than to lie.” Damian’s nose scrunched, eyeing the message as if it spit in his face. Tim shrugged, “It just means he’s hiding something.” 
Bruce said nothing, falling into the role of silent protector. 
“You are not actually going over in your Bat costume are you?” 
In the L/N Manor 
Y/N walked  the dark hallways back to his room. Under his arm was a book and in his other hand was a cup of coffee, still steaming and warming his fingers. The lightning that occasionally flashed filled the area with white light, casting long shadows and creating an eerie atmosphere. 
When Y/N was younger, he used to sprint back to his room. He hated how dark and silent the hallways are, reminding him that he is alone in a place that does not want him. When he whispered to Dick that he was scared of the lightning, Dick had told Bruce and sure enough Y/N would be spending nights at the Wayne manor whenever it was forecasted to thunderstorm. 
Y/N had gotten over the fear, but he still occasionally slept over when the forecast predicted rain. Just because he no longer feared it, didn’t mean he liked it. 
Pausing to look out the window like some gothic prince trapped in a tower, Y/N recalled the argument he had with his dad. The older L/N making a surprise visit and berating his child when he first saw him and when he left. Y/N wondered if with the allowance he was given, if he could just move out. Apartments in the upper end of Gotham were expensive, and he’d never hear the end of it if he moved to East Gotham. 
Not to mention, if he did leave to move out on his own, he’d be further from the Wayne family. Sure, Jason and Dick live on their own, and it wasn’t like Tim or Damian needed him around all the time, but it was home for him. 
Maybe, he’s the one that needs them.
Lightning flashed and there was another reflection in the window. 
“Ahhh!” Y/N threw his cup of coffee at the stranger behind him, and only paused in throwing the book when he saw the familiar cowl. 
“Bruce! What the hell?! Oh my God, oh my God, I think I just lost like 10 years of my life.” Y/N clasped a hand over his heart, trying to calm the organ. Taking deep breaths, he finally managed to steady his heart beat and scrunched his nose at the older man. To which, Bruce Wayne glared back, “What happened to your face?” 
‘Oh shit.’ Y/N sighed, “Nothing Bruce. I just fell, but what are you doing in my house? Did…did you break in?” Y/N tried to get around the taller and bigger man, but Bruce grabbed his arm. He spun Y/N around and thanks to the flash of lightning, Bruce’s jaw clenched at the fading bruises on Y/N’s face. 
“Did F/N do this?” 
“Bruce, I told you I just fell.” The lenses on the cowl narrowed, and Y/N saw the frown grow on the man’s face. Sighing, Y/N scrunched nose and winced when a bruise scrunched with it, “Honestly though Bruce, how did you even get in here? No, how did you even guess this hallway?” 
“You’re rooms this way.”
“Ahhhhh!” Y/N screamed and ran into Bruce’s side for protection against the voice. 
“Dick! Ho-wha- why are you here?!” 
“We were worried.” This time Y/N only flinched, and whirled around to see Damian in the Robin costume. He gaped at the pre-teen, “Oh my God, you all are just spawning out of nowhere.” Damian grabbed his hand, and Y/N couldn’t help but to hold the youngest’s hand. Muscle memory. 
“Y/N, you’re face,” Dick whispered, gently tracing the swollen and discolored skin, “We thought you were sick.” Y/N smiled, leaning into the palm of Dick’s hand, “I was. I’m just getting over it, as for the bruises… Like I was telling Bruce, I just fell.” 
Damian’s grip on Y/N’s hand tightened and the oldest sibling smiled down at him, “What’s wrong Dami?” The youngest gave a small glare through the lenses of the Robin mask, “I find your lies insulting and belittling, Y/N. The truth would be appreciated before things get more drastic.” 
“...Excuse me?” Y/N tried to remove his hand from Damian’s grip, and panicked when Robin refused to let go. 
“Y/N, please be honest. What happened?” Dick, in his Nightwing costume, rested his hands on Y/N's shoulders and tried to coax the truth out of the person he sees as his oldest brother. It only made the other tense, and tried to get out of Damian’s grip. 
“Guys, you’re scaring me.” 
“Y/N, what happened?” Bruce’s voice did nothing to ease the fear that Y/N was experiencing, and for the first time ever in the time he’s known the Wayne family, Y/N didn’t want to be around them. He struggled some more to get away from them, but with Robin’s grip on his hand, Nightwing’s hands on his shoulders, and Batman’s gaze keeping him in place, Y/N found it harder to move. 
Batman sighed, and with a nod that Y/N would have missed if he wasn’t focused on the man, Nightwing’s hand moved closer to Y/N’s neck. The other’s eyes widened, his one free hand moving to stop Nightwing. 
“Wa-”
“Good night, Y/N.” His vision went dark and the only thing he registered was a pair of arms catching him before his body hit the floor. 
++++
Y/N woke with a start, in a very familiar room, with raspberry painted bookshelves and dark sheets. His arms shot up to his face, and bandages rested on his cheeks. Looking at his arm and seeing the sleeves of his pajama pants, Y/N closed his eyes in misery and knew that if he were to lift the sleeves, there would be bandages. 
Sitting up, Y/N grunted and rested his forehead in his hand. 
“Oh good, you’re awake.” 
“Jay…” Y/N watched the other carefully, watching the taller and bigger man silently move across the room to sit next to him. His nose scrunched, “Your brothers and father have some explaining to do. Where are they?” Jason shrugged, “Out. Don’t worry about that, but Y/N, why did you hide this from us?” Y/N stared at Jason for a bit, processing the question and sighing irritably. 
“Cause it's not a big deal. This was the only time and–” 
“One time is still too many times!” Jason yelled, startling Y/N. Wide E/C eyes stared into Jason’s furious blue eyes, the slightest hint of green starting to slowly take over. Y/N gulped, “Jason, it’s fine. I am here now, right?” He reached out and grasped Jason’s larger hand, watching the other calm down with deep breaths. Those blue eyes of his seem to fall on every bandage across Y/N’s face, before looking back down at their clasped hands. 
“Everyone was a mess, you know that right?” Y/N chuckled at him, chalking it up to Jason being overdramatic, “You guys are too funny. I know me going radio silent wasn’t appreciated, but you don’t need to guilt trip me further.” 
“I’m not joking around, Y/N. Everyone was a mess.” There was something in Jason’s tone that had Y/N pausing. His E/C eyes landed on Jason and watched how those eyes continued to glow green. The larger man took a deep breath and seemed to calm whatever raging thoughts he was having, “But it's fine now, because you are here.” Y/N furrowed his brow, but smiled nevertheless, “Yeah.” 
Silence overtook the room and Y/N is still unsure how to proceed. It wasn’t rare for the Batfamily to be a bit… dramatic. For fucks sake Bruce dresses as a giant furry and terrorizes criminals. However, there was something in Jason’s tone that had Y/N stilling. Contemplating his next words and wondering if they were the correct ones to say. 
“You’re awake.” Y/N’s head snapped to the door and standing there was Damian. He gave a smile to the youngest Wayne, “Damian, you're not one to usually enter without knocking.” The youngest strolled over and eyes Jason’s and Y/N’s hands, “I heard you two talking and figured it would be okay if I entered.” Y/N pursed his lips, “Well, true but Dami you should still–” 
“Father wants to talk to you, after dinner.” Green eyes met E/C and there it was again. A glint of something sinister lurking underneath the green. Y/N gulped and outstretched an arm. His palms up like he was approaching a dog, asking to pet it. Damian took the invitation and fell into Y/N’s embrace. Crawling onto Y/N’s bed and into the space underneath Y/N’s arm and against his chest, Damian nuzzled into the space with a content smile. 
Y/N felt his heart rate spike, something alerting him that he is surrounding himself with something dangerous. Which is preposterous. Yeah, Damian was a little psychotic and so was Jason, but they wouldn’t harm Y/N. They wouldn’t hurt anyone that didn’t deserve it. 
Yet, Y/N couldn’t shake the feeling of something being wrong. 
“When is dinner, Dami?” The younger boy hummed, “At 5:30.” Y/N glanced at the clock reading 5:25. Sighing, gently nudged the two away, “C’mon we have five minutes. Alfred will be upset with us for being late.” Damian grumbled while Jason outwardly expressed his discontent. When Y/N fully stood up, he noted that his clothes were different. 
“Who… who changed me?” Jason shrugged and Damian continued walking. Y/N looked back down at the sweatpants he was now wearing and the oversized shirt. None of which are his. 
“I-I should change first–” 
“C’mon Y/N, no one cares.” 
“Indeed, Drake has shown up before looking horrid. You look wonderful, like always.” Y/N said nothing to address those comments, but the time clicking on the clock had Y/N forgoing dressing and instead grabbing his house slippers. Damian was quick to grab his hand and Jason walked behind like he was protecting Y/N from something. 
The walk was silent, and there were some bruises on Y/N’s body that had him wincing sometimes. Nevertheless, when the sound of chatter began to echo through the halls, Y/N controlled his expressions and braced for the question and answers he wanted. 
“Well, look who finally woke up,” Dick joked and Y/N rolled his eyes, “I don’t want to hear that from the people who broke into my house.” He said it as a jest, but some part of Y/N wanted to mean every word he said. The three culprits didn’t even pretend to look guilty. 
Y/N gave Bruce a pointed look, he busied himself by pouring himself, Y/N, Dick, and Jason wine. Damian released Y/N’s hand to go sit at his respective seat, between Tim and Bruce, while Y/N took his between Bruce’s and Dick’s. Dick smiled at him, “Happy to have you at dinner. They have been quiet for the past few days.”
“If that is your way of saying I talk too much Dick, may I remind you who is the reason we had to enact a five minute quiet period during meals before.” The man laughed, unbothered by that little fact being thrown into the air. 
Dinner continued with the usual chatter, arguments, snide remarks, and dirty looks. Y/N’s absence was barely brought up, and instead he got filled in about what he missed while he was radio-silent. No one questioned the bruises on his face, or the now open secret that Y/N had tried to keep quiet about. 
“Y/N, please see me in my studies.” Bruce gently squeezed Y/N’s shoulder and Y/N followed, thanking Alfred as he did so and waving to all the brothers. The walk was tense, and something kept stirring in Y/N’s stomach that he was walking into something dangerous. Not a trap, because a trap means Y/N didn’t see it or feel it coming. However, he can feel this one. He can feel this one coming, something that would have his life changing, and yet he still kept walking forward. It’s the Waynes. His family. 
They wouldn’t do anything he didn’t like. 
Bruce’s study was as dark and aesthetic as Y/N remembers. A dark oak wood desk, bookshelves, the laptop and monitors, and papers. Y/N rarely set foot in here, mainly because there was never a need to, but he remembers being young and playing hide-n-seek in here with Dick. 
Bruce turned and gently cupped Y/N’s bruised face, turning it slightly to take in each discolored patch of skin and open wounds. Y/N smiled, “Bruce, it’s fine. I’m fine. You and everyone else are just being overdramatic.” 
“Is that what all of this is? Us overreacting?” Y/N gave a nervous chuckle at Bruce’s tone, one he’s heard when the man was Batman. 
“I mean, considering you broke into my house, that seems excessive.” Bruce released Y/N’s face and walked behind his desk, and motioned to a stack of papers. 
“Y/N, if entering your home is considered excessive, then I don’t know how you are going to handle this.” 
“Break in, Bruce. It was a break in, and what are you talking about?” Y/N picked up the paper, and quickly scanned the document. Bruce watched the color drain from Y/N’s face and horror take over those bright E/C eyes. They flickered from the top of the page back to the bottom, and then to Bruce and back to the paper. 
Y/N’s mouth opened and closed, trying to form words he was desperate to say. 
Wayne Enterprise Acquires L/N Industries
Bought. Bruce bought L/N Industries. Bruce bought the company from Y/N’s father, because Y/N isn’t the owner, and there is no way in hell that Y/N would have ever signed off on that. His mother’s company, now just a part of the Wayne monopoly. 
“Wha-what is- Why- Bruce! Bruce, what the hell is this?” Eyes filled with betrayal and anger as Y/N glared at Bruce. The man sighed, “It is as it says. L/N Industries in now under Wayne Enterprise-” 
“But why?! You’ve never shown any interest in the company.” Bruce wasn’t interested in L/N Industries. Wayne Enterprise was not a monopoly, and they didn’t buy companies unless that company was already going bankrupt. Bruce was interested in Y/N’s health, and vengeance. 
“Don’t take it personally, because it's not at you.” Y/N rolled his eyes, “It sure feels like it. Bruce, you know what this company means to me, you can’t just–” 
“Well I did.” Bruce met Y/N’s gaze head on, “The company is not in your name, you do not reap the profits, this acquisition was not a jab at you.” Y/N knows who it's a jab at, and he understands why Bruce is angry. However, it does not excuse the fact that this was a jab at the L/N family. 
Y/N clenched his jaw, “There’s no way he just signed it over like that.” Bruce handed him another piece of paper and sure enough, there was his father’s signature. Y/N stared at the inked lines, wondering just how had Bruce gotten that signature so quickly. 
“Blackmail really makes people move faster than the Flash.” 
“Wha… what blackmail?” Bruce raised an eyebrow and Y/N closed his eyes in misery, “Bruce, I get it. I do. He’s not a good father, but you didn’t have to buy the company. He’s literally going to ret-”
“You and I both know he would never retire. You would be working to the bone for him while he reaps all the profit.” Y/N rolls his eyes, and opens his mouth to say something but Bruce cuts him off, “Do NOT roll your eyes at me! Y/N this is serious.” 
Momentarily taken aback by the tone of voice, Y/N stared at a fuming Bruce. He processed the reaction and felt the heat in his stomach return, “Excuse you! You literally bought my family’s company, kind of if not really kidnapped me, and broke into my home! I have every right to be upset, let alone roll my eyes at you.” 
“That place wasn’t your home and you know it.” 
“Doesn’t change anything! That's like saying a break-in at a hotel room doesn’t count because the person doesn’t live in the hotel room.” Y/N could feel his heart rate pick up, and the reality of it all began setting in. 
“Holy shit. Fucking hell Bruce.” 
“Language.” 
“Do not ‘language’ me! Bruce, what the actual hell! All of this is way out of proportion for what happened.” Bruce slammed his hands on his desk, making some papers fly and the cup holding his pens fell. Blue eyes filled with rage glared at Y/N, “You can’t even say what happened! He hit you, Y/N. He beat you like a dog, and animal abusers still go to jail. He’s getting off with only losing the company. 
“And I know that those bruises are the only ones we do see!”  Y/N glared at Bruce, fighting back tears and biting his lips. Bruce sighed, his shoulders deflating and a pained expression on his face. He walked around the desk and hugged Y/N, bringing his son close, “Y/N, I’m sorry. I am. You’ll still be running the company, and will have a final say in things. It's just… God, Y/N. Not hearing from you and then seeing you like that...” Bruce took a deep breath, trying to control his emotions, "It was terrifying, Y/N. How could I let you stay there when all of that was done to you?"
Y/N wrapped his arms around Bruce, ignoring the feeling of dread of doing so. He ignored how Bruce’s arms tightened around him, “Oh Y/N, please. Please stay here where you are safe.” 
He didn’t want to admit that it sounded more of an order than a request. This was Bruce! His father in everything but blood and paper. 
“Just… just please don’t do that again.” 
“It won’t happen again. I promise.” 
______________________________________________________________
Not a whole lot of Yandere, but thats why there will be two parts! Not just one.
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prettyoatmeal · 1 year
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Simon 'Ghost' Riley Headcanons While You're Dating
I figured this would be kinda cute since I've only written for König. Switching it up just a little bit since I think the 141 boys are cuties <3
I know this is quite long too, I'm sorry I had a lot of thoughts I wanted to get out!!!!!
There will be both SFW and NSFW with a GN reader (they/them pronouns) ^^ Enjoy!
GENRE: Fluff, smut after NSFW cut
WARNINGS: Mentions of Ghost's childhood
Masterlist here!
***************
You'd needed to be the one to tell him how you'd felt first. Simon wasn't one to open up about his emotions and mostly tried to ignore and bottle up his feelings, so he never would've been able to gain that courage to tell you first.
When you did tell him, he became super flustered behind that mask of his. You normally called him by his alias and never really used his actual name, so he knew what you were going to say would've been serious.
"Hey, Simon? I think I like you. And I understand if you don't feel the same way, I just figured I should tell you sooner than later."
...
"Simon..?"
He would let out a flustered grumble of "Yeah yeah,, I like you too." and you two would slowly, but surely, warm up to each other more.
He'd be a very gentle lover. Just the thought of him hurting you, even by accident, made him violently ill.
Ghost wouldn't be one to be touchy very early on in you guys' relationship, he kept a lot to himself and you respected that. At times you would hold back from trying to hug him, or hold his hand, or anything, but you didn't mind. You wanted to make sure he was comfortable.
He'd soon realised you were the cuddly, touchy type, so he'd begin making moves like wrapping his arm around your waist or linking his pinkie with yours while you were walking. Just those small touches alone would make your knees weak.
Simon faced a lot of trauma in his childhood so he had trouble opening up to you at first. Once he did start opening up to you, he realised he didn't need to ignore his feelings for once. You made him feel safe.
>:'(( he loves you so much.
He'd call you all the usual pet names such as 'my love', 'darling', 'sweetheart', etc.
You'd often be the only thing on his mind when he'd be on missions or back in the barracks.
He'd always keep a printed photograph of you in a pocket somewhere so he could remember who he was fighting for.
When he'd be upset, he'd always pull that photo out just to look at it. Just seeing your face brought him immense comfort.
His love language would definitely be acts of service. He'll gladly cook a nice meal for you, or tell you to sit down and relax so he could take care of the cleaning.
However, it goes both ways. You'll pack him a lunch for the day He'd be on his knees. Make his bed for him if he were to be too busy? He'll completely melt. It's those little things.
His father didn't care all that much for him as a child coming from an abusive household, essentially needing to take care of himself. Having that someone to pack him a lunch and look after him in such a way made him feel loved and safe.
Of course he'd never take his mask off in front of you. He never took it off for anyone, there were no hard feelings. He preferred his anonymity and you are completely okay with it.
You never asked to see him without the mask because
well,
you just didn't. That was his privacy and you weren't one to invade it unless he would offer or if he were to be ready.
You two were both very patient with each other and that helped build a healthy and trustful relationship.
You also didn't mind not knowing what he really looked like. You first fell in love with who he was as a person, not his physical attributes.
When he did show you what he looked like unmasked, it was ironically during a make-out session.
(He low-key planned it out)
"Bloody hell, this thing is getting in the way." He'd say as the balaclava kept slipping down and shielding his lips from yours.
Thats when he finally pulled the felt which covered his features off, taking you by surprise.
The face-paint was still there, but his beautiful features were completely exposed to you.
He definitely got flustered at just how much you were examining his face.
"You look like you've seen a Ghost, darling."
That snapped you out of it, earning a chuckle from you before you two were sucking each others faces off again without that irritation from the fabric.
While nothing was said in the moment, by the time you two were done, you'd already begun to gush about how handsome he looked. You'd cup his face in your hands like he would to you and place kisses on his nose, forehead, cheeks, everywhere. He'd just look away in embarrassment.
"Yeah, yeah, take a picture, it'll last longer... PLEASE DON'T-"
The hard, confident Simon you knew became a blushy idiot and you loved it.
He was your Simon
__________________
NSFW
Before you two had any 'alone time' together, he'd always make sure there's a large water bottle or an electrolyte drink on the bedside table because, man, his guy has a lot of stamina and a high sex drive.
He could easily shoot a some loads into you over the course of a couple of hours.
You couldn't count how many times he'd make you cum over those few hours as you'd be a babbling mess by the end of it. No thoughts, just getting dicked down.
He wasn't exactly rough, but definitely not gentle. He'll be pounding into you like it was your last nights together for a while. And yeah, sometimes it was, so you two would need to make the most of it.
He wasn't one to inflict physical pain to you either unless it was the occasional slap on the ass or thighs.
He was one to grab onto you though. He'll grab onto any piece of your body he can.
Doggy? Bent over a table? Riding? He'll be digging his fingers into your fleshy hips.
Steamy make-out session? Or just feeling possessive? He'll gladly grab onto your thighs or wrap his arms around your waist.
The boy loves holding onto you, especially when he's in heat, leaving maybe just a few red marks from him gripping onto you so tightly. Maybe even a few scratch marks.
Missionary would definitely be his favourite position.
He'd be able to stare into that pretty face of yours for eternity if his life depended on it.
Missionary also lets him hold your hand as he pounds you into the mattress. The feeling of you squeezing his hand as tightly as you can while you cum makes him go absolutely feral.
Simon wouldn't make all that much noise in bed. Though when he's feeling desperate, he can't shut himself up. He'll let out soft moans and groans and growls into your ear just to let you know how good you're making him feel.
He also would love seeing your mouth full of his cock. The faces you'd make up at him as it slides down you throat could make him cum instantly.
Moan his name and he will also cum instantly.
"Oh, fuck- Simon~!"
He'll start pounding into you like never before, chasing both of your orgasms.
He’ll always make sure that you’re left satisfied. No point in pounding into you if you’re not going to be enjoying it the entire time.
He'd probably cum a lot too. Thick strands would shoot inside you or into your mouth, struggling to stay inside. He'd probably have a thing for pushing his fingers inside your hole to make sure his cum stays inside you.
He's a top and a soft dom so he'd have a bit of trouble getting used to bottoming and/or subbing. He wouldn't turn it away, not for you. But it would need some getting used to for him.
If he's subbing, you could very easily get him to start begging once he gets lost in the pleasure. Though he'd definitely feel embarrassed after. He's a grown, dominant, military man who engages in the most brutal and gore-y activities. He wouldn't have ever believed himself a couple of years back if the future Simon had told him he'll be begging his partner to let him cum as they jerked him off in the slowest, most torturous way.
If you two hadn't seen each other in a while, he'd be pushing you against the wall in an instant with your thighs on either side of him. He'd be practically begging you again to let him fuck you, and you'd of course let him.
Breeding kink? For sure. He LOVES to cum inside you and fill you up.
"F-Fucking hell, look at you, doll, completely stuffed." He'll say as he cums into you for the third or fourth time that night. Your entire body would for sure be shaking at that point.
Of course he’d be affected by the overstimulation as some point as well, he’d begin stuttering every now and again each time his cock would throb inside you.
He'd slam into you with such force, you'll be sobbing tears of pleasure by the time you two were done.
You'll often become extremely tired from sex from the sheer amount of stamina this man has, it can't be said enough.
This man will gladly take you to your limit, but the moment you show signs of passing out or feeling unwell, he'll stop and make sure you're okay, giving you some water and something to boost your blood sugar so you’re not passing out on him. He's not one to take such advantage of you while you're unconscious, and you respect him a lot for that.
Post-sex includes so much cuddling. He'll apologise for accidentally hurting you or if he was too rough and make sure you're all cleaned up and had water before you two head to bed or for a nap.
Post-morning-sex would include him bringing breakfast to you in bed which you thought was the most adorable thing ever.
Your legs would be jelly by the time you two were done, so just trying to make it to the bathroom would be a whole challenge.
Simon would always either carry you or provide you will that stability, it was sweet. He'd hold onto your waist as tightly as he could to make sure you wouldn't fall while your knees would give in.
He was very buff so it would be pretty easy to keep you from falling to the ground.
He'll make sure you're all squeaky clean, hydrated, and fed before anything else.
He truely was the best boyfriend you could ask for.
***************
I loved writing this so much, I'm about to go scream into my pillow. Goodnight, everyone <3
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lynnlovesthestars · 27 days
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Could I request headcanons for Harleep, Astarion, Gale, Wyll, Halsin, Dammon, Rolan, and Zevlor with kind and patient gn s/o? This is quite self-indulgent of me because I have been told I'm too nice & so patient so I'm curious how they would react XD
first of all sorry for being so late, but my small brain has to process things multiple times to make sense, so i wrote this like... 5 times? So it takes me a while, but i hope that waiting was worth it.
Also i saw you sent a second ask to see if i recieved this one, so ill put dammon and rolan there cause this is starting to get a bit long:3<3 thank you so much for your patience!:3
Taglist: @sessils @spacebarbarianweird
Headcanon: BG3 men with kind and patient s/o. (pt. 1)
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Zevlor:
Zevlor is emotionally a wreck already, he considers kindness a virtue and it definitely makes him swoon when he notices you put extra care in making sure he's treated with kindness. At the end of the day, he basically got bullied on all fronts when all he really wants is to prove himself worthy of the title he carried for so long.
Zevlor has a short temper too, and he appreciates so much your effort and patience in dealing with his outbursts, whether they are of rage- not towards you of course- or of sadness, you offer always a shoulder for him and he cherishes it so much.
He is lowkey jealous when he notices that your kindness is not mostly exclusive to him, he has learned that people can abuse one's patience and care, and 1. he doesn't want you to get hurt, 2. he wishes your kindness was maybe reserved to him. Call him selfish, but after being deprived of it for so long, he is hesitant to let go of it.
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Astarion:
Initially he would be very wary, in his experience being nice always lead to him getting hurt, so why would he trust someone who's default reply is kindness? At the end of the day the last time someone was '''''kind''''' to him, he was turned in a vampire spawn, so he takes it extra slow, he has just regained control over himself, he won't blindly accept kindness. He's lowkey afraid you are just part of a bigger scheme that will bite him in the ass and leave him shackled and caged again.
Once he gets accustomed to your kindness and finally accepts it, he revels in the kindness you offer and your patience, especially the smallest gestures like opening a door for him. He will literally melt for it, he's already smitten, your kindness leaves him like mush in your hands.
Nevetheless every good side, comes with a negative one. He is dead afraid your kindness will bring you to get hurt. He often reminds you to be weary and keep all your kindness for people you trust (HIM), rather than going around and helping every lost soul that asks for help. He will fight you on this a few times- especially if you do get hurt or it is obvious you are about to- he will not bite his tongue and keep it for himself, and that's one of the moments when he's glad you are patient.
You understand where it comes from and you try your best to find a solution that would make both happy. Your patience of course doesn't stop there, he knows he's an handful: he carries an heavy trauma baggage and he has a feisty personality, yet you always show him you don't mind, that you are there for him and that he can take all the time of the universe to sort his problems out.
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Wyll:
Wyll would find it so endearing, how you are ready to go to someone's aid, you stop on your tracks to support someone in need, and he would love seeing you being kind to everyone. It's probably one of the reasons why he falls in love with you. Unlike Astarion he encourages you to be kind to everyone, cause he considers it a virtue, he incourages you to be the best version of yourself, and he reminds you that if you do get hurt, he will be there to pick up the pieces.
As far as patience goes, he's grateful to the moon and back, he knows he is an handful, especially if he doesn't break his pact with Mizora and has to leave more times than ever. He makes sure once he's back though that he makes up for lost time, whether it is with gifts or by taking care of you.
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Haarlep:
Harleep is so used to Raphael that honestly he's taken aback at first, living in the hells means that kindness is hard to come by and around Raphael? It's either a trick or a miracle, so he brushes it off, not repelled like Astarion would, but definitely not eager like Wyll either.. he would be probably the one that takes it as it is, just.. that. But when he gets used to it? He becomes unsufferable. So unsufferable that he goes around demanding Raphael to be treated with kindness and patience! He purrs whenever you are nice even the smallest, thanking you and praising you like a goddess. He even tries to be nice himself- to you only- and despite it has to be and effort, since he has never been exposed to much kindness, he does become a little more mindful, even asking before taking your form or just with small acts of services.
One time Rapahel makes sure to send a message to you through him. "Tav, Raphael asked you stop being nice to me, cause if i demand it from him as well, he's going to turn me into fertilizer", message delivered with a pout that begs exactly the opposite.
Harleep is another that is deeply afraid of your kindness. Let's be real, you can defend yourself as much as you want, but people tend to use people and your kindness is one of those characteristics evil people would pry on- he knows well since its literally part of what he does, and a facet of what Raphael does as well. He probably scolds you a lot for this reason, he does it in a sweet way- don't get me wrong- he sugarcoats the shit out of it, but he will let you know when you are about to get in peril or you are too careless with your kindness.
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Gale:
Gale is touched by your kindness, already from the first days after meeting him.
You had helped him out of his blotched portal, you fed him artifacts, you didn't question his secrets or push him to reveal anything, and he doesn't give that for granted. Once he's closer to you, and he learns that you are unconditionally kind to everyone, he's scared.
He starts warning you to be a little less nice, to use your judgement before you blindly trust a stranger, but he doesn't push it past a warning. As much as he wants to protect you, he doesn't want to take away your chance to grow from your errors.
In matter of your patience he's so grateful, he spends days thanking you when he's still afflicted with the orb condition, he cooks as a form of apology or thanks depending what he did, he gets baths started for you, he's treating you as a queen/ king. He alread would do it, but with you? He's even more protective, he almost feels like he has to match your kindness and patience with as much attentions he can muster.
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Halsin:
Halsin is a fair man you think he wishes everyone was kind, but he actually wants you to be fair, he wants you to be mindful of who you give kindness to, he wants you to be a reasonable judge rather than unconditionally nice cause it is the way of the nature as well. Nature is not only nurturing and lush, it's also the poisonous vipers and herbs.
Does he appreciate when you are kind? Absolutely, he thinks it's the best gift Silvanus has ever bestowed him, but it doesn't take away the fact that he wants you to be treated kindly as well, so the moment someone crosses the line and starts abusing your kindness or becomes rude, he's definitely stepping in to s h a m e the other person. "You are lucky you have met Tav, cause they are kind, but nature wouldn't be so understanding and patient" He says it with a rage you rarely see in his eyes.
He will do his best to remind you to surely practice kindness but also to be mindful who you help and who you are kind to, cause there's always rotten that can harm you, and lowkey if you get hurt he will invite you to take back what you gave.
Despite this Halsin considers kindness the bare minimum a person should be, and what stops him from encouraging you to be kinder, its just the knowledge that you might get hurt.
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hollyhomburg · 3 months
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Before I leave you (Pt.67)
(Omegaverse au, Mafia au, Bts x Reader)
Summary: You and Hobi bury a dead body (That's a lie, Yoongi buries it for you).
Tags: blood, gore, body horror, death, dead bodies, everyone is pretty beat-up in this, brief implied self-harm but it's very quickly squashed- seriously it's nowhere near as bad as past scenes but i do have to tag it, Dissociation, tae is in the freeze part of fight or flight. hurt/comfort, mental breakdowns, flashbacks, discussions of past abusive relationships, everything is very fluffy until it's not,
W/c: 12.5k
A/N: Are you guys ready for Hoseok's secret reveal??? I'm really excited!!! But also terrified because this whole series has lead up to this point!!! A good number of people have already guessed his secret so congrats on getting it early <3
Previous part - Masterlist - First part
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Jimin sits on the stairs going down to the basement. His arm in a sling and bandaged up to the elbow. It aches with every small movement he makes as he peals a tangerine. He hasn't had any narcotics in a few hours and they're starting to wear off.
Jimin needs all of his brain power for this; For covering up the murder.
The fewer things running through his system the less sluggish and fuzzy his thoughts are. Jimin picks his poisons and fewer things make him less coherent than the panic and pain and near constant avalanche of thoughts. Tae, Tae's hurt, Tae's-
Tae's fine, Tae's upstairs with Y/n. he has to remind himself of these facts every few breaths. Tae's going to be okay because you wouldn't let anything happen to her.
There is evidence of that virtually everywhere; In the lines across your hands that Yoongi had dabbed at with a cool cloth, the swollen side of your jaw that he'd cradled. The blood drenching the opposite side of your face that he'd tenderly washed away. Not to mention the blood on the kitchen table, the floor, the ceiling. The blood splattered across your nest-
You don't fuck with an omega's nest; you don't fuck with their packmates.
Jimin quiets his brain with a steady breath as he looks down at Yoongi, Jin, and the body between the three of them wrapped in plastic.
He manages to peel the tangerine in his hand despite how uncooperative his left hand is. Numb at the fingertips just like it’s been since the surgery.
Namjoon had stroked his fingers and tested their give every chance he got, holding onto them and prodding while they waited in the hospital room and then again when Jimin got discharged. He said that they’d probably get better. Probably.
Tae's going to be fine because Namjoon is there too- had checked out her head with that soft alpha grumble croon of his. The most soothing sound in the world, and yet incapable of soothing this.
But Jimin knows nothing’s for certain, he might never get the feeling in his hand back. (This is Jimin's penance; The reminder of these tangled few weeks and how things went will be ever present. The reminder will be the first press of every touch with his non-dominant hand. He will never regain full feeling to the tips of his fingers. Never).
There are a few of noodle paw prints in the dust here, Jimin's ass is no doubt covered in it too from resting on the rickety stairs that lead into the half-finished basement. Little paw print marks that would make you coo and take pictures if you were down here.
But you’re not, you’re upstairs getting the evidence washed off of you.
No one's in that kind of mood right now anyway. No one’s been in that kind of mood for a few hours (or a few days, if he’s being honest, from Jungkook’s seizure, to getting shot, and then coming home to a dead body in their living room).
It’s been 4 hours since you killed someone in the kitchen. 3 hours since Jimin was discharged prematurely from the hospital and the rest of the pack was summoned home via a disturbingly calm call from Jin.
It’s been a tangle of moments even for the people not on hard drugs. Jimin feels like he's doing pretty good at answering the pack’s questions given the circumstances. You'd never know that, given Yoongi's eye roll and Jin's heavy sigh.
"Minnie- we're not asking you how you would have killed him just how you'd cover it up."
They used an old shower liner to wrap the body before they carried it downstairs. It makes a squeaky noise against Jin's rubber gloves (The pink elbow-high ones that he uses to do the dishes) as he pulls back the plastic sheet to reveal what's left of the assassin's head and face.
“I already told you, I don’t know his face- not even a little.” I’d have a pretty hard time identifying his face with the state she left it in regardless Is what he doesn't say.
Jimin tucks his chin, unsettled to look at the man's half-blown apart face for long. "I think he might be the spider but I don’t know. I never met him, only heard his name in passing.”
A small tattoo on the man's wrist reveals as much. A small spider tattoo that someone going to have to cut out and bury separately. Someone's going to have to get all of his teeth too- no identifying marks. None.
He’s a little too impressed with the state you’d left him in when he thinks about it. But once he’d seen your face and Hobi’s neck, not an inch of Jimin had felt the kill wasn’t justified. The whole pack feels that way, he knows they must even though they don't say it. Everyone's a little bit in shock right now.
Even Namjoon hadn’t even given the body a second glance when the pack had tumbled into the house. The pack alpha had simply alternated his fussing from you to Hobi to tae and then Jin. Torn between who needed him first. It was the first words Jimin had heard you speak. Your wet gasp, blood that wasn't yours flashing on your teeth. "Joonie- Hobi needs you."
Namjoon had calmed only once he realized that most of the blood on the three of you was the man’s. Yoongi had a similar reaction and so had Jimin, clutching at Tae. Angry at his arm for its uncooperativeness. About ready to tug off his sling and his bandages and stitches if it meant holding tae easier. He'd even tried it, only to be on the receiving end of a disapproving pack alpha growel too.
“Jimin you can’t; your stitches.”
“Fuck my stitches hyung.”
Numb fingers meet numb faces.
He's a bit ashamed of it, but when he first looked up from Tae to you- where you sat crumpled in Yoongi's hold. Your mate laying down a volley of sweet nothings to you to get you to stop shaking. There was only one sentence running through his head.
That’s my girl.
He'd reached over and squeezed your hand, blood and all. That blood has dried now. Soaked into the lines of his palm. Coloring his fate and love lines all rusty while he eats the tangerine. He should probably wash his hands. All of them probably need too.
Jungkook had been the only one willing to speak, closing the door softly behind him, locking it and treading softly closer. Careful to sidestep both the pools of blood and the piece of a skull sitting next to the couch. He looked down at the 7 of you with a surprisingly calm expression on his face.
"Can't we have one normal fucking day?"
Jungkook was the one who’d gone to the kitchen and gotten one of the hand towels to clean your face. His lips tightened to a line when he wiped away the blood and started to see the bruising, the cut across your temple dripping fresh. Lower lip wobbling ever so slightly.
“Kookie-”
Jungkook had turned to Jin and Namjoon, “I don’t want to deal with the body hyung." His hands were already under your arms, lifting you up, helpless. "Help me get them upstairs. We need to-” he’d let out a frustrated noise. Instincts coming to the full front- instincts he rarely feels.
Who knew blood would incur Jungkook's grooming instincts?
The last time Jimin saw Jungkook; He was helping Namjoon and Yoongi herd the three of you upstairs for a much-needed shower. Hobi hadn't been able to do it under his own power. Namjoon had to carry him.
Hobi; who's choked on every word he's tried to speak. Whose eyes are still red from all the burst blood vessels. Who easily got the closest to dying out of the four of you.
Everyone shakes when they touch Hobi and everyone touches him softly. Namjoon just about snaps his teeth at anyone who tries to get close. His hands turning red from the cold of an ice pack wrapped gently around the alpha's throat.
Jimin knows Jungkook's a lot more unnerved than he lets on, shuffling from foot to foot as he bound Tae up with a towel, taking her delicately from Jimin's arms. Carrying her in the same way Namjoon carried Hobi.
Yoongi was all soft helping you upstairs. Speaking in that quiet voice that he saves for Sunday mornings and stolen moments of quiet. Every moment, all of this is stolen.
And now- the beta is down here, leaning over the body and looking at it like it will tell him something that you won't. After your initial demand that Namjoon he tend to Hobi; you haven't spoken a word. Neither has Tae. Jin's done all of the talking.
There isn’t much to say.
Jimin feels the numbness in his hands and looks at Jin. He hasn't apologized for the bullet yet. But the more time that passes the less Jimin wants an apology. Mating marks come in many forms. Jimin has a scar on his body from one of his omega's- so really? What does he have to be upset about?
The whole house needs to be deep cleaned, and then deep cleaned again. There's blood everywhere; on the couch, the ceiling, the curtains. It's a lot to clean. It's going to be a lot to hide.
That's the only reason why Jimin's not upstairs helping you and Tae clean up right now; the body is unfortunately the biggest threat to the pack's safety at the moment.
There’s a bloodstain on the stairs too, a droplet next to where Jimin sits. he makes a mental note of it but doesn't move to wipe it up. He puts a tangerine slice on his tongue and chews before he answers Yoongi’s next question.
“I don’t know how to dispose of a body, I never dealt with this part. My only job was to kill, not take care of them after. I know there’s a way that you can do it with soap.”
Jin snorts, “You only know that from breaking bad-“
Jimin’s a little miffed, “We already have a plastic tub upstairs-”
“Lye,” Yoongi corrects, looking down at the body before he stoops to retape the plastic over the man's face. It was a bitch to wrap him up, the body stiff and heavy from rigor Mortis. The blood beneath it bubbles and darkens, coagulating. Yoongi's long hair falls over his face and he tucks it behind his ear.
“We could use the soap, but it might take a few days.” Jin clarifies.
“Do you think we can wait that long?”
“Absolutely not,” Jin’s got a similar ice pack to his wrists, the skin there bruised and red and swelling where he fought to get free from the handcuffs, where he eventually ripped down the banisters and broke through them with brute strength and panic.
You’d found the keys on the man’s body soon after and released him from the handcuffs, they're wrapped up in the plastic along with the frying pan, the gun that killed him, and a few other items from the living room that were just too bloodstained, every big piece of evidence will lie right beside him where he rests.
Jimin eats another slice of the tangerine, and Jin shrivels his nose at it. “Isn’t that a little gross?”
Yoongi mirrors his disgust. “Yeah Minnie, weren’t those covered in blood?”
But Jimin just shrugs, “I washed it and peeled it hyung” And keeps eating. After a few days of hospital food, the tangerines taste divine.
Yoongi stands from where he’s kneeling on his knees with a faint crack. “One part kitty litter, two parts concrete should keep out the smell,” Jin says, eyeing the 6 by-six-foot hole in the basement's foundation, already there from the plumbing that needed replacing.
Most of Yoongi's tools are down here too. His scrap pile of wood and the dozen bags of concrete. His hack saw and his circular saw that none of them are looking at. Yoongi had only just fit in the plumbing a few weeks ago. He'd been about to re-pour the foundation anyway.
“I’d rather not have a body buried in our house.”
Yoongi touches Jin’s wrist, so feather-light, removing the ice pack to check the swelling to see if it’s gone down. Jin's left hand is just as useless as Jimin's, the knuckles bruised and ballooned.
“It’s just for a few weeks, we can deal with this once it’s all calmed down, but we absolutely can’t go try and bury it. Who knows what the neighbors heard?”
They're all silent at that, silent at the idea that these few hours might be the last few that the pack spends free.
But over the next few hours, there are no blue and red flashing lights outside or concerned neighbors that come knocking. Your one saving grace is that this all happened during the middle of the day and all of your nearest neighbors have nine to five's. Is it so simple to hope that everyone was just at work? That no one heard the gunshots over the nearby roar of the passing train?
(Maybe they're just too used to the pack next door; the one that has the noisy ruts and noisy noisy packmates. The one whose alphas have a habit of opening the windows in the back room and let the sound of their roughhousing and video games flood the street. The ones who have extra loud movie nights. They're just a bunch of kids, how harmful could they really be? At least the pack alpha and omega look respectable.)
It's a good thing that no one comes; because Namjoon has more important problems, more important things to handle beyond the body in the basement or the police at the door.
Namjoon’s hands cradle Hobi’s neck. He wheeze as he tries to speak, his mouth falling open. He's mostly clean, but a rusty trickle of water from his hair trails down his shoulders.
Jungkook tugged him into the shower first and gave him a rough clean before handing him back to Namjoon. They sit on a towel together on the edge of the nest. they only moved him in here to give him some privacy- to distract him because Hobi kept reaching for you. you'd kept reaching back, tae was already in the shower under the stream.
"Pup- your hands- you're going to hurt yourself."
The Nestroom is dark and quiet. Every single blind in the house is draw. Only the christmas lights illuminate Hobi's injuries. Namjoon will tend to Tae and then you after he's checked out Hobi's injuries. will send him downstairs with Jin for some cold water to soothe his throat once he's done. once he's been cleaned again probably.
Hobi was covered with the most blood, having been just under the man when Tae had blown his throat apart while you- Namjoon doesn't want to think of it, doesn't want to see it.
(Namjoon thinks of every moment, sees them behind every blink. Blink and he sees you sitting in his lap over breakfast squirming happily. Blink and you're kneeling in a bloody puddle looking up at him.
Blink and you're curled up in the nest wearing the first pajama pants he'd given you. Blink and he's watching Jungkook dab at your bloody cheek, blink and you're turning into his hand to nuzzle as he wakes you for sunday morning breakfast. Blink and there’s sunlight spilling across your face and blood slipping down your chin. Namjoon's smallest and most sensitive pup not so innocent anymore.)
Namjoon touches Hobi's throat with no small amount of reverence. it cools the anger in his throat. Namjoon's anger has no good place to go.
When Hobi closes his eyes, he sees it too; the explosion of the bullet and the splat of blood pouring down his face. The shower earlier felt so similar- he almost couldn't handle it. He had to concentrate on Jungkook's voice narrating everything.
"Here Hobi, I'm gonna use some soap now. I like Tae's body wash. You know she always just picks whatever bottles are pinkest because she wants all her toiletries to match. It smells good, doesn't it? Can you take a deep breath for me? Through your nose?"
Endless meaningless Jibber jabber to distract all of them.
Now he shivers and shakes in Namjoon's hold. One part terror and one part near frostbite. Namjoon turns the heat up but Hobi still shakes as Namjoon checks his throat. "Open for me baby- that's a good boy."
He flashes a light down there, listening with his stethoscope. The cold metal end of it presses against his collarbones and the bruises too. Finger-shaped that lace over his jugular like a collar. Over Hobi's heart. Every thump ba-thump ba-thump music to Namjoon's ears.
Namjoon’s growl is soothing as he scoots closer to gather the injured alpha close to his chest. Shushing Hobi as he tries to speak for the dozenth time in the last hour. “Don’t try it, careful- I don’t think he did any lasting damage but-”
Namjoon breaks and his forehead drops to Hoseok’s shoulder, fingers rub out soothing circles on Hobi's wrist even as he starts to cry. Namjoon already stitched up the deep puncture wound there. He had to hold his wrist still as he dabbed the stingy antiseptic, the impulse to pull it away too great. The wound wasn't from a bullet but from the piece of the door that embedded itself in Hobi’s wrist. Blown apart the way he could have been.
Namjoon was so close to losing everything, to losing them.
The bruises, Hobi’s eyes, and his little raspy breaths. Everything both punishment and payment for every violent thing Namjoon wants to do. He feels powerless to do more than hold the smaller alpha right now. The strength in his arms doing little to protect Hobi from the hurts he's already nursing. Hoseok leans his head on Namjoon's shoulder and Just lets the alpha hold him.
If he’d come home to the four of you dead what would he have done? more accurately- What wouldn’t he have done?
Namjoon imagines it- the same way he's imagined it thousands of times. Tae's blood on her lips as pretty as any lip stain. Jin on the floor, his little big love wrapped up in permanent stillness like a mating shroud. Your body turned small and quiet the way you'd been when he'd met you- only so much worse. Hobi with his heart slow and absent of his near-constant music. Bodies stiff as statues, turned alters meant to worship both grief and love.
He’d probably have demanded Jimin and Yoongi tell him everything they knew. And then he’d have gone hunting.
Namjoon lets out a shaky breath and pulls away from Hoseok only to continue dabbing at his wounds. The violence of his alpha's instincts calmed by the sanctity of this- of making it better. of being gentle even when namjoon wants to be anything but.
Hoseok’s mute. Throat too swollen to make more than a soft hissing sound on command. Vocal cords not damaged just swollen. Leaving his brain to hurdle through the last few hours. Eyes closed but his mind wide open.
He sees it all behind his eyes; your hand descending with the frying pan, the explosion of wood near his head. The splat of hot blood against the wood floor. Gasping and getting blood in his mouth accidentally. Choking in it- drowning a little. Everything. The sting of smoke on his eyes. Your words ring in his ears like the final notes of a symphony.
“You can take me. I’ll go with you. Willingly. That’s what she wants isn’t it?”
Hoseok’s brain teases through what you might have meant with that. The unnamed she that you mention. Who, why, and what aren’t you telling them? Is it the woman that Yoongi talked to you about before?
He's unable to say anything to Namjoon even as the alpha softy cradles his damaged throat. Unable to even whisper it out through the swelling that threatens to cut off Hobi's airway. It feels like he's breathing through a straw. Namjoon says he's not going to choke, that it only feels that way. The panic is hard to let go of.
But who do you have to go back to there? You've never talked about the family like you wanted them, like they were your pack. Who have you run from? What monsters are here to haunt you? Who is after you? Or is it something darker- more sinister?
Maybe Hoseok's heart has never truly healed from Yoongi leaving them. Maybe a wounded heart remembers. Yoongi always had them to go back to that Hoseok had never questioned. But he's never wondered about you or stopped to consider that maybe, Yoongi's not the only one who left something.
The family doesn't exactly seem like something you can walk away from unscathed. Yoongi managed it, but Jimin didn't.
Hoseok should warn Namjoon, should tell someone but- it's impossible. His airway protesting with an agonizing twinge with every attempt he makes at speaking. He wonders if this is what being nonverbal felt like for you.
The pain pulses dully without adrenaline to dilute it as Namjoon so lovingly examines the marks, again and again. But he shouldn't be spending so much time. You and Tae are bruised and battered too- even if Hoseok’s are by far the worst; you need tending to.
Jin’s hands. Your face. Tae’s head. Hoseok’s throat. Each of you has lost the thing most necessary to your survival.
Hoseok thinks of the body, not the one that sits downstairs, but the one that you found months ago in the ocean. Maybe this wasn’t a coincidence. Maybe none of this was. How far back do the coincidences go? Between Jin and Yoongi who wouldn't have a relationship to stand on without Yoongi's family- how many other things in the pack are because of this?
Hoseok struggles to speak, to talk to Namjoon about what you'd almost done, what you'd almost bartered- but nothing but air comes out, and the pack alpha shushes him. His hands grip Namjoon's shoulders hard.
Namjoon wishes he had more than just numbing cream and sutures for Hobi’s hurts. Jimin’s already offered up some of his opioids for Hobi to sleep and as much as Namjoon hates the idea of anyone swapping medication- Hobi might actually need them.
Jimin’s doctor had been a little bit liberal with them, sure that his 6 on the pain scale had to be at least a 9. He could spare one or two. The truth is that nothing hurts more than this- seeing the people that you love in pain. Jimin and Namjoon save their 10s for days like this.
With the blood cooling, Namjoon’s anger has nowhere to go. The body in the basement has already gone cold.
In the quiet of the house they can audibly hear Seokjin and Yoongi start mixing the concrete. The dull scrape of a shovel against a bucket and the sound of a faucet dripping.
Namjoon wipes at Hobi’s throat, and Hoseok tries again- futile in his efforts to speak. Namjoon shushes him.
In the basement it goes; drip, scrape, drip.
~-~
Jungkook holds Tae up underneath the warm spray of water. The glass is foggy in places and clear and others, occasional spots of red water joining the constellation of them. She rests against Jungkook's chest, her body is prone and almost lifeless. Eyes vacant and glassy.
So shaky and tired as her body rockets down from its adrenaline high. A drop so abrupt that she could hardly hold herself up. A drop so terrifying that Jungkook must do it for her.
He doesn't mind, none of him minds as he cradles the back of her head oh so gently. Tae flinches, whether from pain or the sudden movement. Jungkook meets Jimin's eyes through the foggy glass and then yours. Biting his lower lip before Jimin nods and tells him to keep going.
Evidence is evidence. Washing off can’t wait.
Jimin has joined you upstairs with the body already packed away and on its way to being buried under the foundation of the house. Jimin watches on from outside the shower as he instructs Jungkook in a quiet voice on how to clean Tae of evidence properly. He's been quiet since then. Staring at them while Tae stares blankly back.
You watch them from where you sit. Mostly you just watch Tae. When Namjoon's body doesn’t block your view. He stitches the gash on your forehead, hands pulling the sutures closed in a gentle and practiced way. The pass of the needle through your skin a distant sensation.
The wounds on your hands are in that awkward place of not being deep enough for stitches but still a little too deep to not need something. After a brief debate, Namjoon sealed them with a bit of non-surgical glue that stung terribly and then regular gauze over the top.
Your hands are swelling and clotting. Scabbing although trying to touch anything is too painful. Closing your fingers at all hurts. Namjoon holds you so lightly it hardly feels like he's holding you at all.
Namjoon apologizes after every wince.
The second he’s done he tosses his suture kit into the bathroom sink with a clang the second he’s done. Namjoon gets on his knees before you. The plastic that covers the whole bathroom crackling as he does.
Jimin had the great idea to cover the bathroom with sheets of plastic to cut down on the cleanup. Hoseok's bloody footprints join Tae's trailing from the doorway to the shower. Join the trail that you left. Parts of you are still dripping.
"It's going to scar," Namjoon says, a little sadly. Thumb skimming over the mark on your forehead.
You swallow hard. You still taste blood. You want to brush your teeth; you want to shut the lights off and go to sleep. You want Noodle and you want Yoongi you want everything from the past few hours- the past few years to be gone and over with. You want-
You want to snap at him and tell him that it doesn't matter that it will scar. That you're covered with scars already and you don't care but-
Namjoon kisses your forehead. A lingering brush. The one spot that's not bloody.
You look over at Tae and her eyes flicker blankly to you. Jungkook keeps bringing the boar bristle brush up and down her back in soothing little circles.
When you turn back to Namjoon he's pursing his lips and blinking away tears as he looks down at your hands. You resist the urge to say you’re sorry. You’re not sure what for. The terrible feral hunger in you gone as quick as it's come.
Namjoon’s fingers wrap around the hollow of your knees, and you meet his eyes, even though you don’t want to. It feels too much like a confession already.
“I’m going to say this now, before you get any ideas; This is not your fault and I am not mad at you and Tae for doing what you did-”
“Namjoon-”
He continues on, words rushing out. “I’m proud of you pup, so proud. I’m sorry that I wasn’t here. I promise I won’t disappoint you again as pack alpha-” You cover his mouth with your hand, gauze and all.
The bit of gauze over your palm is already turning bloody. It's hard to tell if it's your blood or if it's his. You’re the last one to shower. The last one to get clean. Namjoon shouldn’t be touching you at all.
And yet he does, yet he cradles your face, brushes the tears from your cheeks, gets blood on his hands. Evidence is evidence, but love has a steeper sort of price if you don't express it when you can.
When you take your hand away, Namjoon doesn’t try to speak again. someone says something that you don't hear, that you can't hear.
Namjoon stands and when you look up, Jungkook has the shower door open for you.
Because the bandages and the glue on your hands can’t get wet Namjoon binds your hands with Ziplock bags and duct tape. The plastic rustles, and you follow Hobi's bloody footprints into Jungkook’s arms. Namjoon closes the door behind you.
Every bit of plastic is going to get melted down later, until all the blood and terror evaporates through something as simple and trivial as fire. Fire will cleanse it of all evidence, as sure as the burning water you step under.
You're not quite sure what you're going to do about the bullet holes in the walls or the blown-apart door to the upstairs bedroom, but Yoongi’s always had a handle on the home improvement stuff.
Jungkook helps you disrobe off your bloodied clothing. Lifting your shirt over your head and stooping, telling you to hold onto his shoulders so that he can take off your sweatpants. You're pretty sure they're Yoongi's but there's no time to get sentimental as he puts them inside a garbage bag along with Tae's and Hobi's clothes.
Everything on your person is evidence. When you look back Namjoon's gone, summoned by Jin's distant call from downstairs. It's just Jimin outside of the shower. watching you, but mostly watching Tae.
You’d be more self-conscious of your nude body if your brain wasn’t still racing. It’s hard to do much with the bags on your hands. But Jungkook squirts out a healthy dollop of your favorite shampoo and gets to work once the conditioner is in Tae’s hair. She sits like a discarded ball-jointed doll on the built-in bench. Her long hair hair stuck like a sheet over her eyes.
Nothing is as important as making sure you’re not found out. And the frothy shampoo turns rusty around Jungkook's fingers. You have to have a lot of blood on your face. All the water that rolls off of you goes pink.
Jungkook is gentle even by your hairline scratching against your scalp with his fingers. The skin there is tender. Namjoon taped a bit of gauze over the sutures too. You don't remember when he did that.
You make a noise. “Too rough?” his voice has something unreadable in it, something soft and concerned.
You don't respond because Yoongi makes his reappearance at the doorway. The black shirt he wears is dusty at the front from the concrete. His eyes single focused on you the second he enters the room. You stare at him the way that Tae stares at Jimin. Jungkook just huffs and pulls you a little more snugly against his chest.
Tae stands in the corner of the shower, still staring at Minnie. Minnie who stares back, practically not blinking. Both of their anguish are hidden behind glass. Like fish in tanks that could never get out. Not really.
Part of Tae gets washed away down the drain. Swirling and gurgling down and down with no one to notice.
Tae stares off blankly into space. Sometimes Jimin talks to her and sometimes he hums through the glass, he'd be in there too if his bandages couldn't get wet either. If Namjoon hadn’t yanked him back from the doorway and told him that he couldn't.
Jungkook takes the boar bristle brush to your body too. Everything has to be scrubbed multiple times until your skin feels nearly raw from it. Tae’s fingernails, her arms, your neck, the side of your face, the hollow at the inside of your arms. Your knees. Everywhere.
He apologizes when he goes over bruises, wincing, clutching you a little tighter, a little closer to make up for the pain. But Jungkook is meticulous as he cleans of evidence until you feel groomed clean. Until there’s no more blood swirling down the drain just clear water, and the light outside has turned pearly and blue in the twilight.
Tae's still silent. She's been quiet beyond the occasional heartbreaking whimper since you both killed that man. Eventually, You push at Jungkook's hands with a pointed look in her direction where she's slumped and he goes with a soft nod. Two omega's taking care of their alphas.
Jungkook’s delicate with Tae’s head, gentle in the way he cradles the bruising, half hidden by her hair. Washing out the conditioner with a quiet hum. Namjoon had diagnosed her with a concussion pretty quickly, it's not a crack in her skull plate but she's not going to go putting her hair up in a bun any time soon.
Jungkook alternates from you to Tae. One moment you're standing, the next Jungkook is taking you up gently from the floor and Yoongi is at the glass, hand on the door- looking at you anxiously. Letting out a volley of cursing. You can't remember the last time you heard him use language like that.
"Hyung she's fine- she's just slippery, I've got her."
Their voices are so soft and grave and so quiet. Or is it just that you can’t hear it? Why are their voices so far away and muffled? Sometimes Yoongi is here and sometimes he isn't. Sometimes Jungkook is holding you, talking to Namjoon about something, and other times he and Yoongi are talking. Keeping their voices low. Your ears ring. It's so loud it deafening.
“Do you need me to take over?” Yoongi asks Jungkook. Jungkook has blood on his feet, from you or Tae you’re not sure, it soaks the hair there. Jungkook’s got hairy fucking feet for an omega- you’re not sure why you’re concentrating on it. Why you’re noticing all these things now. Cataloging little things about them like you might never get the chance to notice them again.
Your heart beats quick, fear still consuming you even though the danger has passed. You look down at the tiled floor and the room spins.
You don’t feel a thing when you close your eyes. You don’t feel anything when you think of the man that you just killed. You don’t feel anything but roaring, like the crashing of the ocean or the sound when you lift your ear to a shell. The hearing in your left ear where the gun went off feels…off, muffled. You put your hand up to toy with it and freeze when you realize it isn't right.
"Guys" You paw at your ear. But they don't seem to hear you.
"No, I've got them.”
“We need to clean up the downstairs. Kookie, where do you keep the oxyclean?”
"Guys"
They still don't hear you. Maybe you're not making a sound at all just mouthing the words. Your movement gets Tae's attention and her eyes focus for the first time in hours. Slumped on the bench, her hand grips the tiled edge hard as she tries to stand but can't. Jungkook hands Yoongi something through the steam, the black trash bag full of bloody clothes.
The notice Tae trying to get to you first. she hits the floor with a small thud and tugs her way over to you. You make a noise in your throat- a distressed chirp that makes the alphas flinch. Tae cups your cheek as you dig your finger in, slippery from the plastic- and pull something small and fleshy out of your ear.
It's soft and squishy. A curved piece of pink and white brain matter. A little bloody but bleached from the water.
You try to stand to your feet but teeter, shaking, staring down at the chunk of person that you just got out of you, that was just in you.
For a second, no one says anything, but then-
“That’s so fucking gnarly.” Your head jerks up in Jungkook’s direction.
"I think I'm going to be sick," Tae actually does look a little green, but it's good to hear her voice at the very least. She hauls herself over to the drain and starts to dry heave.
"Oh tae don't-" the sound of vomit hitting the floor joins the sound of the shower. You don't look at her. just at the lump of person in your hand.
"Someone please take it from me," Jimin is already there opening the glass door and holding out a cloth for you to place it in.
Yoongi presses his hands to the glass as he watches you struggle to grab the brush that Jungkook was using on you from the floor after finally getting your feet under you. Jungkook is torn, his hand on Tae's shoulder as she wretches turning from her to you like he doesn't know what to do or who to help first.
You don't care about the state of your hands you just need to get clean. You Ignore the twinge of pain in your hands as you try and get the bottle of body wash open. Ripping off the plastic bags that cover your hands when you can't unclick the cap immediately. frustrated and panicking. You ignore Jimin calling your name. The gauze falls to the floor with a wet thwack and you take the boar bristle brush to your hands. Cuts and all.
Big hands stop you. Hands that dwarf yours. Hands that you'd know blind.
Yoongi's standing under the spray fully clothed, the water pinning down his hair and quickly soaking him. His hands tangling with yours, taking the brush from you. Wordless as he grabs your wrists and jerks you forward hard.
He holds on until you stop shaking. resting against his chest. guiding your face to his scent gland. "Take a deep breath for me now sweetheart- there you go- just like that."
Jungkook doesn't say anything and neither does Jimin, not as Yoongi starts to wash you again. Jungkook just stoops to lift Tae and place her back on the bench. She goes easy, limp, and doll-like. But she's almost done- she's almost clean. Tae pushes at Jungkook’s shoulders.
"I’m fine. I need to wait for the nausea to pass before I try getting out of here.”
With you, it's going to take a little longer.
Jungkook has already shampooed your hair, but he does it again. The telltale signs of rusty red in the peach-scented shampoo. Bubbling orange-pink. Yoongi does it slower, gentler- it feels more normal. Like the slow loving you're used to.
“Do you ever feel like-” your voice is a little crackly from all the screaming you did earlier. You hate how the terror makes you not remember all the details. Did you make any sound while you killed him? Did you say anything through the rage?
The others are looking at you but you have eyes for just Jimin. his hand tightens to fists, knuckles pressed against the glass. eyes darkening ever so slightly. “Do you ever not feel guilty? About killing people Minnie?”
You are nude, as bare as you’ve ever been before him, it's hard to be self-conscious about it. Maybe this would be a little sexier- showering with Tae and Jungkook and Yoongi with an audience if you weren't literally trying to cover up a very violent murder.
You remember the words Jimin had said to you weeks ago now. “Would you kill for me?” “I’d do worse” you wonder if this qualifies as worse. You can’t imagine what would be much worse than this.
Jungkook's hands are rough as they massage a bit of soap down your back but instead of being comforting, it feels like you’re going to vibrate out of your skin.
Jimin hums. Eyeing Tae still sprawled on the built-in bench. Jimin gathers his thoughts before he speaks. “In my contract, at the beginning-” He starts but cuts off as you start to slip. Jungkook's hands find you, helping Yoongi hold you up more properly. Your mate doesn't let Jungkook take you entirely just moves a bit to the side to give him space. Any other day you'd love to be in the middle of a yoonkook sandwich but-
“Your contract?” he nods, blond hair bobbing. Yoongi meticulously removes the dried blood from under your fingernails, careful to hold your glue sutures out of the direct spray.
“I specified that I’d only ever kill bad people. of course I got a little lazier after I got used to it." He shoots an anxious glance in Tae's direction, but she's still just sitting. "But at the beginning, I’d go back and look through their files to try to find out what they’d done to warrant a hit getting taken out on them. I couldn’t always find a reason but most of the time I did."
You can see it in his face, that Jimin doesn't want to say that they deserved it. Because if they deserved a violent ending then you could say the same about the 8 of you. Jungkook's hands get a little close to the nape of your neck and you turn to him and snap.
"Don't scruff me."
"Sorry." You need it. Is what he doesn't say.
“Most of the time it was worth it?” You cling to his words. With Geumjae you’d never had to guess if he deserved it or not but this-
Jimin’s eyebrows are brought into a hard line, “Karma is a fickle thing. Sometimes it never comes but-” his eyes are downcast, "Sometimes it's a good thing, being the karma."
You sit quietly, digesting his words. Your lower lip trembles, and you don’t know if you feel terrible or better when the tears just won’t come. Yoongi delicately cradles your body, wrapping his arms around your waist from behind and pulling you back against his chest.
“Yoongi.”
“Let me hold you for a minute.” You do, body sagging under the weight of your exhaustion.
Tae teeters in Jungkook’s hold, but she pushes against his hands weakly when he tries to make her stand again. Her voice sounds warbly and fragile when she shakes her head. “I’m still dizzy.”
He tries to guide her gently back to the bench, but she doesn't make it that far. Pushing away his hands when she descends to the marble floor. Closer to the wall, Closer to Minnie who mirrors her, falling to the floor too. Getting as closer to her as he can without being in the shower.
Jimin lets out a sad and bitter-sounding laugh and Tae smiles in reply while Jungkook and Yoongi share an anxious glance over your head.
He's still grinning, words twisting, eyes shining with sorrow and fondness. “You couldn’t wait 24 hours until you had to make it even, didn’t you?”
Tae closes her eyes as her smile twists and she starts to cry “Where you go, I go. We’re the same now Minnie.” Jimin doesn't mean to ask what she means. He knows.
If you're a killer I'm a killer. If you're damned, I'm damned. Even though neither of them believes in God or heaven or damnation. Not really. Not anymore. It's very half-hearted.
(I don't know if it's worth wondering if the people you love are bad people, I think when worse comes to worse, you just put the heaviness down and keep on loving them anyway).
Jimin’s eyes are soft on her, the way that they only ever are with Tae. He places his hand on the glass fogging around his fingertips. She doesn’t match his hands, just leans her cheek against it. Love is only a thin layer of glass away.
You know it hurts her a little bit, must make the dysphoria a little harder to breathe through, to let Jimin and Jungkook see her like this; just the long hair and nothing delicate to cloth her soul in. A soul that now you’ve irreparably tarnished.
A soul that is damaged beyond repair now thanks to you.
It is your fault. All of this is because of you. all of this pain and anguish and damage is because of the choices you've made. the stupid idiotic childish choices. If you'd never needed it- if you'd just been strong enough- Tae could have been whole. Tae could have been unharmed. Hobi and Jin too- if you’d just-
Back at the hospital, Tae had so many questions about Jimin’s job, so many questions about when and where, and why. But she finds her head empty of them in the aftermath. She has no desire to learn anything else about Jimin’s job. Not now that she knows what killing feels like.
Tae is never going to be able to look at red nail polish the same way again.
Jungkook reaches over and turns off the water.
~-~
Eventually, you finish washing. Wrapped up in fluffy white towels that will have to be burned too. The house smells like bleach and gunpowder. It covers everything.
Even the noodle is looking a little more grubby than usual when he zips by, meowing for someone to give him attention. You hear the saw going and you know that Yoongi is cutting the bullet holes out of the walls while the others clean up the blood.
Your skin feels pink and sensitive were the towel brushes as you go looking for pajamas, you'll get some for the others too. Later, Jin will fuss and ask to put some cream on you. Will massage it in something of an apology and pretend that Yoongi isn't going over the whole house with a blacklight to spot any errant blood splatters.
Later Yoongi will take a wood scraper to the floorboards where the man died, will rip them up, and burn them in the house's ancient fireplace just to be sure that no one finds any evidence.
You'll all pretend that Tae doesn't shake through a panic attack when you have an informal dinner in the nest. jin's rule of "no food in the nest" broken for this. You'll all pretend that Hoseok won't choke choking on all but the smallest sips of water. You'll all pretend. You're good pretenders, good liars too.
Later, Jin will put cream on your skin and dot it all with kisses, the swelling in his hands won't take too long to go down. You'll get the love and You won’t deserve a single second of it.
You don't know how you fooled yourself into thinking you ever deserved it. The last 8 months have been stolen. Not earned.
The one-year anniversary of Geumjae's death comes and passes as you go to the top of the stairs in your towel, Ears straining to hear what's going on downstairs.
There is a lot of talking going on downstairs, between Yoongi, Namjoon, and Jin. About what to do, and how to handle this. Hushed voices kept mostly out of earshot. And other more dangerous questions get asked, with equally as dangerous answers.
One of Jimin's guns sits on the kitchen counter through all of it. No one moves to put it away. They're not sure when they're next going to need it and they'd rather not get caught off guard again.
“I could talk to some people- call them. Some people owe me favors, There has to be some section of the family that doesn’t want her too-“
"Absolutely Not, I am not having you get into some weird ass mafia debt"
"Yeah, jailcell orange is so not your color hyung"
“We stay quiet. For the next 48 hours- it’s likely no one will know what happened. They’re too hurt- we need some time to regroup and think.”
Hobi’s voice is absent from the fray. You hear something quite like he's trying to speak, and someone shushing him softly. Namjoon says that his swelling won’t go down enough to talk until tomorrow. You hear the sound of someone opening the refrigerator to get ice.
The door to the bedroom has been blown apart, and a flurry of bullet holes chewed through the top corner. It sits off its hinges and in two pieces.
You remember watching Yoongi paint the door, sitting at the bottom of the stairs while he worked at the top of it and painted it to match the wallpaper in the staircase, a dark cobalt blue. You remember all of it, every little thing you watched him do to make this house into something worthwhile. To make it into a home and now it's riddled with bullet holes and stained with blood.
It's funny, you hardly remember every little thing he did for you, to make you worthwhile.
You have always been a reminder that you don't make houses out of abandoned buildings, and mates out of monsters that bite.
The water has turned the cuts on your hands white and gummy when you look down at them in the closet room. They’re already oozing, not bleeding, it will be at least a day or two until you can touch anything without discomfort. Namjoon will scold you ever so gently later and re-do your bandages.
The pink curtains are drawn already to keep out any wandering eyes from the outside. This is a dressing room after all. The whole room feels like a blush-toned jewel box and you, the one piece of cheap costume jewelry at the center.
You get up and shut the door before you sit on a small poof- something silky and tufted that Jimin had gotten Tae right after she'd come out.
You sit in your towel and look down at your wounds. Thinking about Tae's concussion. Jin's wrists. Hobi's throat. Both of their blank looks and the violence of death and trying to live. You think it all through, every possible ending to this before you pick up your phone and dial Her number.
Moonbyul picks up on the first ring. It’s like she’s been waiting for your call.
“Did you like your courting present pup?”
Your throat is dry and you don’t know exactly what to say, even less how to say it. She hums at your silence, an alpha's imitation of a purr. Waiting until your quietness builds to a frantic pulse.
In the pack, you've always been the one with the best survival instincts. Geumjae made you this way. Although the pack has spent the last few months trying to heal you; deep down you know you've never been anything more than a scared animal. Fight or Flight. Freeze or fawn.
Bullet to bullet. Tooth to tooth. Heartbeat to heartbeat. This time is different. This time you have something worth protecting.
You stand, no longer able to sit. There is a noise at the door, and you wait with bated breath for someone to come in. They don't come. But you stand and move farther inside. Hoping that the distance will disguise the sound of your whispered conversation.
She continues when it becomes clear you're struggling to speak. “I’ve got another one on the way. Hyejin’s here, wanna say hello? You’re on speaker.”
“Pup,” she giggles, and you feel like you might vomit. It’s a struggle really, not to end the call right there, not to let the fear overtake you. “We haven’t heard back from Spider yet, and I have a feeling someone’s been a little naughty.”
You lift the curtain to look outside, the train chugs past and the cars flit by like the fast small birds searching for seed in the snow. The whole world is grey and flat. The sky is orange from the lights of the city reflecting the clouds. The trees bare of all but a few crumbly leaves. It’s strange how all at once, the train is all you can look at. All you can think about.
You think about hoseok, the night at the train tracks where he stopped you from leaving. When he asked you to stay.
“Tell me what I need to do. Tell me what I need to do to get you to stop this, please.” Your voice sounds off, even for you. Too flat, strange even to your ears.
“I’m afraid we’re too far along for that.”
"Please, please Moonbyul-" You turn, pacing back towards the door. Past Tae’s clothes, past yours, past Jungkook’s, past the alcove where Hobi hangs his sweatshirts for you. You pause there. Looking at them.
“You said- you said when it was over you’d give me anything I wanted. Well I want them alive. Even if-"
Your voice is so shaky, you're careful to make sure you're not overheard. The pack is in the other room, just downstairs. You can hear the distant hum of their sweet voices; the people you love always sound like a melody. Your absence hasn’t been noticed yet.
"Even if I’m not here.”
For once they’re silent on the other end of the line. It’s a full silence, filled with one part lust and one part hunger. Both of them are like Noodle playing with a mouse. Waiting for the right time to drive their teeth in and end this game.
But even mice have teeth. Your hand is holding your phone so hard that the plastic makes your bones ache and your cuts bleed fresh.
“If you don’t let them live, I'll never stop fighting. But if you want me to be willing- If you want me to be your pup the way I think you do."
You can’t even close your hand into a fist with how wrecked your hands are. They hurt with every clumsy movement. you hold the phone. Your every heartbeat lurching with the horror of what you're doing.
I can’t lose them; I can’t be the reason why they die. They'll keep sending people until we're all dead unless I do something.
“All of them, all of them need to be safe, Jimin- you need to let him go of his contract and let him go back to living a normal life and you need to not punish Jin for working for the FBI.” Your words rush over themselves. "Leave my pack alone and I’ll be obedient. I'll be yours. I’ll never try and go back to them again. I won’t ever try and leave. I promise.”
Moonbyul and Hyejin are silent on the other end of the phone. You wait for a few moments. They must be looking at each other, deliberating.
Everything in this room aches. The closet bedroom that Yoongi made he made for you. The wainscotting just so. Everything in this house was crafted with an equal amount of love.
It was never meant to be yours forever, you’ve been keenly aware of this fact since the moment you met Yoongi. Since the moment you met his eyes across the dining room table and the moment his teeth met your skin. Borrowed things don't belong, they never do. Good things do not last. You only get them for as long as you get them and not a moment longer.
You're looking at Hobi's sweatshirts, in the alcove where he stacks them for you to take when Moonbyul and Hyejin respond.
“We'll agree to those terms, but remember their safety depends on your performance."
"You have 24 hours to get to us pup. Make them count.”
The dial tone drones like a funeral drum.
~-~
(Hoseok, a few years prior)
The backroom at the record shop is cramped with all sorts of things from a bygone era;
A mini fridge with a decrepit desktop computer and logbook balanced atop it. Pictures and bulletins glued to the wall from the 1960's. A greasy coffee machine piled high with bags of expired tea. A cramped spot for employees to hang their coats and a yellowing old table with a pair of chairs; both occupied by people also out of place. a beta that has a thing for 1980's rap and an alpha with a broken heart who admittedly loves 2010's pop.
A poster of some glittery showgirl omega from the 20s bats her eyelashes down at Hoseok as he has a mental breakdown. Offering neither comfort nor absolution nor love.
Maybe if he'd been born an omega like that, it would have been easier. Maybe they'd have wanted him then.
Yoongi's hands rub down Hoseok's shoulder, his back, places only lovers have touched. Up and down. An endless circle. An ouroboros of affection nibbling Hoseok's fickle heart. Hoseok aches harder with every passing moment.
Yoongi looks at the clock as Hoseok continues to sob. The shop should be open right now but Yoongi won't let it. It can go out of business for all he cares. As long as no one makes Hoseok get up from this chair before he's ready.
Beta instincts are fickle things, but Yoongi has always had a third sense. Something in him always knows if people are trustworthy and if they need him. Something in their scents or faces or eyes- like small planets reflecting the cosmos back to them. Do planets bear life only when someone is willing to look for them? Do people only deserve help when they're willing to ask for it? or is it like this?
Eventually, Hoseok gets his breath back in his chest and his sobs quiet down. His eyes open bloodshot. All sadness has an expiration date (thankfully). Yoongi's hand slides down his arm and gives his hand a firm squeeze (and stays there).
It's the first time someone's touched Hoseok without wanting something in God knows how long but he's too sad to properly appreciate it or savor it. (Yoongi doesn't want anything from him that Hoseok wouldn't willingly give. Doesn't want anything but his smile. fuck- he's just a co-worker, isn't he?). Who knows when the next touch like this might come? (Yoongi is going to hold his hand tomorrow because Yoongi likes holding people's hands, Jin will give him the tacit permission to do that at least. But all of the pack are keenly aware that Hoseok needs time to heal, no matter how obvious Yoongi's crush and Hoseok's needs).
(Hoseok is definitely not just Yoongi's coe-worker at this point, but saviors come from all sorts of unlikely places)
Eventually Hoseok's sobs quiet and Yoongi sighs, pulling back. He takes one look at hoseok's red nose and pale cheeks and puffs up. "I'm making your hot chocolate and you're going to tell me what's happened."
He gets up like he needs something to do. Like he's tired of taking care of Hoseok. He doesn't take it personally, he's tired of it too.
“My mates they- they kicked me out of our den,” Hoseok confesses. Yoongi's got two mugs in his hands, they thud against the counter when he reaches into one of the cabinets.
It’s warm in here but Hoseok is still thankful for the sweatshirt the beta gave him. Not only for its warmth but for the layer of scent it provides; It’s soaked with the smell of chocolate. So comforting and heavenly that it makes Hoseok a little dizzy when he tucks his nose into it and takes a hefty sniff when Yoongi's got his back turned.
Hoseok was never given the other pack's items, never allowed or encouraged to indulge in their scents. They never asked for his either.
Yoongi hangs both their jackets above the radiator in the back so that they’ll dry faster. He bears an impressive bite mark on his arm, visible because of his short-sleeved shirt. It's bruised just ever so slightly- an alpha bite but not a mating bite because betas don't mate. A mark like that on him is as good a claim as any. Even with the other scents that cling to the sweatshirt.
Hoseok hasn’t known him long, but they’re friends even if they’ve never met up outside of work. You can't not be friends with someone you spend upwards of 30 hours a week with.
Yoongi just hums. "Have you been with them long?"
Hoseok appreciates that Yoongi doesn't use the past tense, his heart too tender around the idea of endings. Some part of him is unconvinced that it really is over. A stubborn heart for a stubborn alpha.
His hair is starting to dry when he nods. "It's been a few years." Hoseok bites his lip, "I could lie and say I didn't see signs but-" his hands end up in his hair, elbows leaning against the creaking yellow table. Tugging a little. "I'm so fucking stupid."
"I don't think you're stupid," Yoongi says, hand on the back of his head. warm rough fingers. Touching him ever so briefly as he passes to put the milk back in the mini-fridge. "It's not stupid to want to find more love where you got it."
But in truth, There's not much more than Yoongi can say. Not much more that he knows to say. He'd never met Hoseok's pack. Whereas Namjoon and Jimin and the pups have a general tendency to linger around Yoongi person at all hours and locations. Stopping by to drop off coffee or just to make funny faces at him through the window when they're on their way to work. Yoongi has never met his co-worker's pack and has never seen much evidence at all on him beyond some vague hints of scents.
That alone is enough of a hint; usually, when people have packmates they're soaked in their scents. Visceral claims to keep any wandering eyes wandering still. He'd be lying if he said he hadn't wondered why Hoseok didn't wear his packmate's scents.
It’s not like the alpha smells bad at all- a little strong sure, but less genetically dominant alphas tend to smell a little sweeter like omegas.
At least that’s what Namjoon says when he feels like info dumping. Late at night when the pack asleep around them and only Yoongi's stayed up to listen. Because Yoongi likes the sound of Namjoon's voice when he gets into the details. Stroking across Namjoon’s bare chest just to feel the alpha's words rumble against his fingertips. His heartbeat against his ear the backtrack for all of it.
Whoever Yoongi’s pack is; they surely love him a lot. That much has been evident since the second that Hoseok met him. Evident in the packed bento boxes and the bunny-eyed omega that walks with him to work sometimes. Or in the tall omega and alpha pair that Hoseok has seen perusing the shelves when he comes in to relieve Yoongi of his shift.
Hoseok has worked here for 6 months. It’s impossible not to collect these details. The hickeys on his throat that he wears after weekends, how ruffled but generally loved Yoongi looks when he comes back from rut and heat leave.
“Is there a reason why they left?” Yoongi tries to be as undiscerning as possible. Voice gentle and measured. Stirring the hot cocoa and putting it in front of Hoseok.
Hoseok takes a sip and it feels like he's drinking a cup of the beta in front of him. Yoongi melts a little into the chair at the happy noise Hoseok makes.
It's good. Really good actually, Yoongi uses twice as much Swiss mix as the package instructs and a tablespoon of honey to boot. More chocolate can never be a bad thing.
Before Hoseok has a chance to respond, The phone next to the cabinet rings. And Yoongi takes it off the stand and hangs it up again in quick secession so that it doesn’t ring anymore. It has to be important but he ignores it for Hoseok's sake. Yoongi does a lot of ordering for the shop, the rare records that their boss is always trying to source and sell. It's a lot of chasing down leads and curators.
(This is not true. This is a lie that Yoongi and his boss have fed him. This phone is set up for the family's use. Hoseok doesn’t know that most of the calls Yoongi answers are more delicate than just simple stock orders.)
“I just found out that my brother has stolen from me, what should his punishment be beta?”
“How much did he steal?”
“300k”
Yoongi swallows, fighting his narrow margin of benevolence. The drops of mercy that he's allowed to show without suspicion. He tells himself that the other beta would order a far worse. People only call him when they want lighter punishment.
“A finger for every 100 then.”
The people who call ask him all manner of things. Things like “I think my child might be planning on going to the police, what should I do before anyone finds out about it?” He is both a secret keeper and a jury.
“Send them away. Out of sight and out of mind of anything that they might be able to share. I hear the military academies are lovely this year. So much snow. Yes, they take omega recruits.”
“My firstborn child presented as an omega instead of an alpha. They're my firstborn and heir, how should I proceed?”
“I can ask around for an advantageous match but I’m sorry, there is no fixing presentation.”
Hoseok hasn’t seen a phone like that in years. Didn’t even know they made old-fashioned ones like that anymore. Ones with a dial, the blue plastic worn from the number of times Yoongi's had to pick it up. It doesn't stay silent for long, ringing soon after yoongi's hung it up.
“I'm the only- they’re an all-omega group.” As if by the mention of his sub gender Hoseok’s angry burning sugar scent fills the room. In reply, Yoongi’s sweetness rises. Hoseok takes another sip and pretends it's just the hot chocolate warming his cheeks. “I guess they wanted to keep it that way.”
"I've got two omegas and they keep me on my toes, I can't imagine four." That gets a laugh out of Hoseok.
"You've got a bunch of alphas in yours though, right?" A bunch already, I wouldn't be needed. Hoseok has seen them, the tall one with dimples that looks like something out of a soap opera. The scary-looking one with the chubby cheeks who's always holding hands with the pretty academic one who likes the jazz in the corner.
Yoongi nods, "That must be nice," Hoseok's eyelashes are all clumped together from the tears. "Having so many people to take care of you."
Yoongi hums, knuckles brushing Hoseok’s hand on the table. It’s just one tender touch but Hoseok starts to break. To crumple.
Yoongi senses Hoseok breaking, pulling him in close before he has a chance to really fracture (he comes just in time, Yoongi loves Hoseok just in time). Yoongi’s scent alone is enough to soothe him- beyond the way he guides the alpha to rest against his throat. Hoseok fights it only a little, what's a little scenting among friends?
They're not just friends, it's not just scenting.
Hoseok wants to bury his nose in the beta’s throat, but that wouldn’t be appropriate, not with the scent of so many others clinging to him. He still sags into the hug. Turns his face away to avoid the temptation.
“They didn’t even tell me- and now the lease on the apartment is up and I can’t afford it on my own and-“ I’m so scared and I just wish there was someone to take care of me. I wish I was a pup again.
They sit like that at the table and Yoongi just lets him cry, He pulls back after his sobbing has cooled. They hug until they both smell like gooey chocolate chip cookies with too much brown sugar.
Hoseok sniffles, “We have to open up the shop,” Yoongi's arms tighten around Hoseok's shoulders in reply.
“It can wait a few more seconds.” Hoseok wants to say that the owner wouldn’t like that but he doesn’t.
Yoongi sips and hesitates. “Do you have a place to stay tonight?” Hoseok pauses for a second, flushing before he shakes his head. “Okay, it's okay. You can say with me.”
“Are- are you sure they won't mind?” But Yoongi is already typing away on his phone, shooting a quick text to the pack group chat (a chat that Hoseok will be added to in exactly 23 days, but who's counting?)
“Not at all. It’s a bit cramped with all of us but we have a spare bed in the closet room that Tae likes to read on sometimes- Jungkook's boss slept there last night after they came back from drinking and Namjoon was so mad- he won't be mad about you though- it's just that Jungkook- he just really shouldn't be drinking."
"Is he underaged?"
"No, he's just got health issues."
"Oh." Yet another person who gets the love he needs, the care he needs. Hoseok tries and fails miserably not to be jealous over Yoongi's omega whom he's never met.
He won't be jealous for long. Later Jungkook is going to challenge him to an arm wrestle just to prove he doesn't need babying. Beating alphas in feats of strength is his favorite thing. He'll feel Hoseok’s hand in his and get completely distracted. "Wow, you've got like- really pretty hands!" and drag them close to his to compare sizes. He'll be smitten nearly instantly with Jungkook- for what it's worth. The jealousy only lasts for a few hours.
Within a few seconds his phone is ringing off the hook, he shows Hoseok the chorus of, “Yes it’s okay!” and “Poor thing, tell him he can stay as long as he wants.” "Of course hyung!" "Does Hoseok like kimchi-jjigae or should we just order pizza?" “Oh! Can we get some with pineapple?” “Gross Jk.” "Yeah we all know Minnie doesn't like the aftertaste of burnt fruit."
And Hoseok can't help but feel like he doesn’t deserve this kindness and such an effortless acceptance. There is a knock at the front door before he can say anything. A few short taps against the glass. Yoongi tells Hoseok to stay put while he goes to deal with a pushy customer who wants in. Leaving him alone in the backroom with his cooling hot coco and the poster still staring down at him.
(They say two can keep a secret if one of them is dead, but that's not the only way a secret stays buried; the best secrets are the ones you’re not even aware of.
Out of all the people in your pack. Hoseok is the only one in possession of a secret like this. The best kinds of secrets are the ones you don't even know are secrets see- he doesn't even know that this memory is enough to save you. Hoseok is entirely unaware that in his mind lies this memory.
Hoseok was the first person to get on the no-kill list, and it wasn’t because of Yoongi.
All packmates of a Don get put on the list;
no matter if they're active or past.)
Sitting at that yellowing wood table; Hoseok feels more settled now that he knows he has a place to sleep tonight that isn’t this backroom. Pulling the sleeve of Yoongi’s sweatshirt over his palms and sniffing at the collar where it was pushed up against Yoongi’s scent gland.
If he thinks hard, he can pick out a few scents here and there soaking the fabric. (Milky Omega Jin, Honey Sweet Puppy Jungkookie, Cinnamon sweet Alpha Tae and vanil-lalalala Jimin, Coffee Alpha Namjoon and Chocolate Yoongi).
It's so different from his ex-pack's scents. Their sugary sweet omega peppermint and sharp lemony evergreen, winter berry and pine, the cold smart of snow against his nose. His burning caramel scent- so off-putting. The one scent not Christmas-themed. The one that didn’t fit.
By comparison- Yoongi's pack smells like a bakery in summer. Every scent that could be added to a cake maybe (one day, in the kitchen, he’ll eat your tiramisu and realize yes- that’s exactly what it’s missing. Your cakey scent makes them all complete, the warmth of baking things).
He has somewhere to go now. Somewhere to be. Someone to trust. He trusts Yoongi- even if they’ve only known each other for a handful of short months.
And Yoongi’s pack can’t be worse than his last one.
As if in reply to Yoongi’s phone (buzzing with more texts that he doesn't check because Hoseok is nothing if not respectful of people's digital privacy. If he checked he would see "Is that the hot coworker you're always talking about? The one who always looks a little sad?")
Hoseok’s phone buzzes with the notification he's been waiting for.
Pack Omega 🌙 calling.
Pick up? Decline?
Hoseok hasn't yet gotten around to changing her contact information. He scrambles at it, spilling the hot cocoa across the table as he rushes to pick it up. Scrambling to get to it before it goes to voice mail. Blood pounding in his ears.
Hoseok’s voice is broken as he says his pack omega’s name, his old pack omega’s name.
“Byulyi- Moonbyul please-”
Moonbyul is cold on the other side of the phone. Maybe she’d have liked him more, and wouldn’t have given up on him if he didn't beg. But Hoseok has never been above begging. Not for love. Not for the thing he wants and needs the most. Hoseok needs love more than air and as Yoongi said- it's easiest to go looking for love where you once got it.
Even when you know it could hurt you.
Her voice is flat and unaffected. “I just wanted to make sure you found a place to stay tonight. Are you still going to be around to give the landlord the keys?”
Hoseok finds himself nodding even though he knows she can’t see him. “Yes- I can do that, I can do anything you want. Can we talk?”
“No.”
“Moonbyul please-”
“Goodbye Hoseok.” She says, hanging up after a second. Hoseok looks at the phone. Pushing the button to redial. It doesn't go. She’s already blocked him.
It will be a long time until Hoseok hears from his last pack again, a long long time until he says their names again. He will remember the way he’d begged, the way her name had sounded smack dab in the middle of it. And hate hate Hate how it makes him feel. He won't ever say their names, regret and self-disgust getting in the way.
It's a little funny, thinking of how different things might have gotten if he'd just told yoongi their names. If he hadn't let his alpha pride get in the way. A few days from now they'll talk about it together. "I don't like the way saying their names makes me feel- it feels- I hate how much I want to say it- to see them again- saying their names just reminds me of the power they had over me."
Never again, will Jung Hoseok beg for someone to give him the bare minimum. This is his lowest point. The moment where it shifts- for good.
His head is in his hands when Yoongi comes back into the room. Still sniffling, crying yet again. Yoongi sets a palm in his hair, ruffling it. Eyeing the spilled hot cocoa with a raised eyebrow.
“If you wanted coffee you could have just said so-“ he makes an attempt at levity and is rewarded with Hoseok’s small snort. Wiping his wet cheeks. Neither of them is aware of the secret. Neither of them is aware and so much worse off for it."
Hoseok grins, “Are you buying hyung?”
~-~
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Notes:
in the story there has always been this question- mainly raised by jimin during his secret chapters- if the m/c is actually in love with them or if she's just manipulating them- at the beginning of this chapter- we actually see jimin finally dispel the last bit of him that thinks even a little bit that this is the case. once he sees how much she put her body on the line- that question isn't even in the back of his mind- even a little. i ended up re-editing this part alot because of it.
every time i write something from jimin's pov i'm always like "why is everything so meandering? why are things disjointed?" and then i remember that's literally jimin's character- that he is in a lot of ways an unreliable narrator.
(TW) i have this idea in my head that namjoon DOES NOT become a good person in the event that all of them die like- a whole separate idea of him becoming a doctor for the family through yoongi's connections with the soul purpose of one day killing moonbyul and her entire pack…including their pups on accident which ends up destroying the last bit of namjoon's innocence as a person…and he ends up becoming one of the families assassins alongside jimin as a result, in this event jungkook does not stay with them and instead moves on and yoongi stays and tries to get them to stop only to ask them to kill him as their last kill because he's unable to cope with the loss of jin, hobi, the m/c and tae. BUT ANYWAY I DIGRESS THAT IS NOT THIS STORY.
i think in this story there is this really interesting dynamic of femininity and death and morality- that being said red nail polish is definitely a metaphor for whose comfortable killing and who isn't. i like the contrast between tae who will never wear red nails again- vs the moon pack who all are not allowed out of the nest if their nailpolish isn't perfect like- thats another layer of the fucked up shit.
are you suprised that the m/c is going to leave? Did you see it coming from a mile away? i mean...it is in the title of the series 😈
….the parallel between hobi losing his voice and the m/c not having a voice at the beginning of the series- you can project whatever meaning you want onto that <3
also on that subject the line "Jin’s hands. Your face. Tae’s head. Hoseok’s throat. Each of you has lost the thing most necessary to your survival." it's worth mentioning that thats not what i think is the most necessary thing to their survival but it is their own interpretation of what keeps them alive. like i for one actually think that the m/c is a lot more pragmatic than anyone gives her credit for but i digress. i could go on about all of their strenghts.
what did you guys think about hobi's secret reveal???? a fair amount of people have guessed it and i think when someone got it at the beginning of the series i lied and said it wasn't- i'm allowed to be an unreliable narrator too!!! kudos to everyone who got it! i feel like it could have been revealed better and originally the big one off was slated for next chapter but i decided to shift it to this one (mostly because i think the next chapter is about to get up there in terms of word count tbh 😭) but T-T its done now! please give me praise because i'm baby and this week has honestly been really hard
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exhaslo · 5 months
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Puzzle Pieces Ch10
(Mafia!Miguel x Shy!Reader)
Ch.1, Ch.2, Ch.3, Ch.4, Ch.5, Ch6, Ch7, Ch8, Ch9
Warning: Smut so Minors DNI, mentions of abuse, blood, murder, language, fluff, bullying, mentions of sex, shower sex, praise
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You were trapped there again.
Afraid.
Your body was already shaking, just anticipating the heavy footsteps once that creaky door opened. Your breathing hitched as those thoughts became reality. The loud creak made you stumble as you hurried to the kitchen.
Swiftly, you tried to stop your hands from shaking as you prepped a plate. Tears were rolling down your cheeks as you heard a heavy bag hit the floor. Your heart was about to burst out of your chest. You couldn't focus and because of that...
CRASH.
"Fuck, woman." Eddie hissed.
You started sobbing and apologizing as you attempted to clean up your mess. His footsteps grew louder and harsher as they drew closer to you. Your breathing stopped as Eddie appeared in front of you. A harsh scowl on his face as he looked down at you.
"Tch, so useless. Clean this shit up and get my dinner ready. I got to head out again soon." Eddie spat as he gave you a swift kick to your stomach.
"S-Sorry....hn...I-I'm so s-sorry." You sobbed, holding your stomach in pain as you kept cleaning.
"Can't believe I got stuck with you."
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"I'm sorry!" You gasped, crying as you awoke.
It was hot. You felt sweat all over your body as you scooted off your bed. Another nightmare about him. This was the first one you had since you officially dated Miguel. Unable to stop shaking, you hurried to your living room and grabbed a puzzle.
It had been two weeks since Halloween night. You were happy with Miguel. Everything was going so smoothly, so why. Why were you having nightmares again?
"It's s-so l-late...I-I...d-don't...want...want to bother...." You sniffled lowly, shaking as you reached for your phone.
Miguel had told you to call him whenever you needed to calm down. He was so understanding. Shuddering as you felt your chest tighten, you hesitated to press on Miguel's name. It was almost midnight. What were the chances that he was awake?
-------
Miguel sat alone in a dark room. The only visible thing were his eyes that seemed to have a red glow to them. An echo of a tap was heard until the door creaked opened. Miguel exhaled softly as he watched Miles and his little crew enter.
"Still nothing?" Miguel's tone was more than annoyed.
"Our lead got us nowhere. The best we can do is just keep watching the supermarket." Peter stepped in. Miguel's eye twitched,
"Why is it so hard to find one man?"
"Well, to be fair, we're always fighting someone so our attention isn't that focused on this one dude," Gwen sighed and glanced at Miles, "Maybe we can draw-"
Miguel slammed his fist against the desk. His glare more prominent than normal. Everyone took this as a sign to leave. Not before apologizing to Miguel first. Once they were all gone, Miguel hissed lowly as he grabbed a bottle of whiskey from under his desk.
Right as he poured the liquid into a glass, Miguel growled at the sound of his phone. It was late and Miguel was ready to go home, but of course, that new pest of a mafia group had to cause trouble. This new Venom group was going to be destroyed one way or another.
"(Y/N)?" Miguel whispered as he saw your name on his phone, "It's late, Conejita (bunny), why are you still up?" He lowered his voice for you.
"I...I had a n-nightmare," You whimpered.
Miguel's eyes soften as he leaned back in his seat. Your voice was scratchy and low. You've been crying. That and your stuttering was pretty bad. Oh, how he wished you were in his arms right now for him to comfort you.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Miguel glanced at his watch, his own exhausted eyes drooping slightly,
"N-No...I...I just...j-just need to c-calm down. I-I like...h-hearing y-your voice." You whimpered softly. Miguel inhaled deeply as he found the energy to stand,
"I'll be there in a bit, amor (love). Don't worry."
"O-Okay,"
Miguel smiled softly as he heard the relief in your tone. He hung up, then immediately called his driver. Despite still having a lot of work to do, Miguel was going to call it a night. He can have his men and women do his dirty work for now.
Miguel needed his relief.
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You played with your sleeves as you fixed up your place. It helped you clear your mind a bit since Miguel was coming over. Hurrying to the bedroom, you doublechecked his spare clothes. Since you started dating, you bought Miguel some cozy clothes in case he ever decided to stay over again.
You were always the one to sleep over at his place.
Feeling your cheeks burn, you shook the thought away and hurried back to the living room. Miguel was going to come over any minute now. You needed to finish your puzzle.
'Pick up this shit! What are you a fucking child?'
Your breathing shuddered as the voice screamed from the back of your mind. You held the small piece in your palm, unable to stop shaking. Your sleeves slowly rolling down, revealing the scars you gave yourself as a means of escape.
'Do you have ANY FUCKING IDEA how fucked I'll be if you tried to fucking kill yourself? Don't be a stupid little bitch!'
Tears rolled down your cheeks as you sobbed once more. Why did his voice have to come back and haunt you? Why was he such a poison in your mind? Eddie was a venom. Eating away at your soul until you were nothing left.
"(Y/N)?" Miguel knocked against your door.
Quickly, you hurried to him. You tackled Miguel, wrapping your arms around him as you sobbed into his chest. With ease, Miguel picked you up and carried you into the bedroom. You didn't want to let him go.
"What's wrong, (Y/N)?" Miguel asked, sitting you on the bed. He noticed a pair of clothes set aside for him, "Hm?"
"I-I k-keep hearing...h-his...his voice. I-I can't..." You tighten your grip against his jacket, "I-I'm sorry. S-Sorry I'm a burden."
"But you're not," Miguel sighed softly and lifted your chin, kissing your tears away, "He is no longer in your life. Y estoy planeando matar al cabrón por ti, mi conejito. (And I'm planning on killing the fucker for you, my bunny)."
"Mhm, M-Miguel..." You whispered, only understanding the 'bunny' part, "Um...I, um...I got you some comfortable clothes...to s-sleep in. W-Would you like s-shower first?"
"Only if you join me,"
You bit your lower lip and slowly nodded. Honestly, just having Miguel here was calming you down. Following Miguel into the bathroom, you helped set the water and squeaked softly as Miguel already started to get undressed.
You followed suit, still hesitating with your clothes. Miguel approached you, his hands gently holding your waist. You closed your eyes, finally removing your shirt. Miguel responded with a hum and proceeded to kiss you,
"My beautiful girl," He whispered, slowly pulling you into the shower with him.
Your heart fluttered every time Miguel complemented you. Your shower was small, so your bodies were pressed against each other. Miguel had you in his embrace, his head resting against the crook of your neck as the warm water hit his skin.
"(Y/n), whenever you think of that asshole, I want you to remember that I'm taking care of you now," Miguel whispered in your ear as his hands stroked your sides, "That I cherish you for the wonderful woman you are."
"M-Miguel," You whispered, feeling your back pressed against the wall.
You whimpered softly as Miguel started to kiss and nibble at your neck and shoulder. You slowly wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders as Miguel lifted you up. You shuddered as Miguel started to grind his hips into yours, causing you to wrap your legs around his waist.
"Call out of work tomorrow, amor. Let me spoil you."
"B-But...mhm, I-I can't...c-call out again." You whimpered softly, resisting a moan as Miguel's dick slid against your folds, "M-My...b-b-bills"
"I'll take care of everything," Miguel hummed, making his marks on you, "You deserve a break. Let me take care of you."
"M-Miggy," You moaned as his tip poked your hole.
You arched your back against the wall, giving Miguel more space to mark you. He hummed in response, his fingers slowly rubbing circles against your clit. The heat of the shower was fogging your mind as you started to give into the pleasure.
"That's right, let me take care of you." Miguel hummed, stealing your lips in a kiss as he gently slid his dick inside you.
"Mhpm~"
Your legs tighten around Miguel's waist as he started to thrust into you. His gentle yet rough thrusts sending you to nirvana with each slap. Whimpers and moans were coming out loudly as you clenched around Miguel's cock.
Every time Miguel fucked you, it made you remember the difference between him and your past relationship. Miguel was far too good for you. Gasping, you fell victim to an orgasm with another simple rough thrust from Miguel.
"Gooooood girl. That's right, you're doing so good for me," Miguel groaned, his thrusts getting a little faster and harsher.
You flung your head back, crying out as Miguel kept hitting your sweet spot. Your hands were gripping his hair, your head resting against his shoulder.
"Miggy~"
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Miguel grunted as you kept clenching around his dick. Your blissed out expression gave him full to keep going. You were doing better giving yourself into him. Miguel just needed you to realize that you didn't have to work anymore.
That you could live with him.
Hearing loud knocking from against the shower wall, Miguel chuckled darkly. Seems like his shy bunny was being too loud for your neighbors. You didn't even notice as Miguel drew another orgasm out of you.
"Let's take this to the bed," Miguel chuckled.
Still holding onto you, Miguel turned the water off and brought a towel. He placed the towel on the bed before laying you on your back. His harsh and rough thrusts continued as he pressed you into mating position.
"I'll treat you like the princess you deserve to be," Miguel grunted as he unloaded inside of you.
"M-Mig..." You breathed out, "P-Please...K-Keep going,"
Miguel just chuckled as he kissed you deeply. Your cute fucked out expression just begging for more. Miguel flipped you on your stomach, pressing himself against you back. You whimpered and moaned as his rough thrusts continued.
"Ah, sabe tan bien. Eres mi dulce conejita en celo, ¿no? ¿Quieres que te dé una razón para ser mía? (Ah, taste so good. You are my sweet little bunny in heat aren't you? Want me to give you a reason to be mine?)" Miguel whispered, falling into his own lust.
Miguel pressed his hand against your back, watching you grip the bed sheets. Your moans filling his ears like music. Your sweet pussy dripping and sucking his dick, forming a white ring around his cock. Your moans were almost pornographic as Miguel finally let loose.
"I'm going to treat you so well tomorrow. I've had such a long day." Miguel whispered in your ear, "Going to make you forget all about what hurts you."
"Miguel~!" You cried out, collapsing after a harsh orgasm.
Miguel sighed softly as he finished. Another grunt and a moan, Miguel gave you one last load of his cum. A loud sigh escaping his throat as relief washed over him. As he pulled out, Miguel smiled at his work once more.
You were fast asleep, your body twitching softly with his marks all over you. Miguel put on the clothes you got him and proceeded to wipe you down. He found some new pajamas for you and got you dressed before finally climbing into your bed.
"Not the best way to comfort her, but this works too," Miguel told himself before falling asleep.
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"Took forever, but we finally had time to get here." Eddie huffed as he stood in front of the supermarket you worked at, "Now to take back what belongs to me."
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next chapter
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Text
𝑆𝑎𝑣𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐺𝑟𝑎𝑐𝑒
Summary: Black Family sucked. That's what your friends, your family and boyfriend said. They were obsessed with being "pure" and ready to do anything to achieve that... But none of you would have known exactly what measures they would go.
A/N: I went overboard with this one, and had to seperate it to two parts. So, hopefully, next week, you guys will have a second part. But I'm sleepy while uploading this so... Forgive me if there are some mistakes, I'll fix them later. REQUESTS ARE OPEN!
Trigger Warning: Mentions of torture and abuse, some very slight make out mentions(?), typical Black family, 8.2K words.
Pairing: Regulus Black x Pureblood!Fem!Reader
Prompts: "No one makes me smile the way you do.", "I've always loved that about you.", " I know I don't say it a lot, but I really do love you." and "You're all I'll ever need to feel better." from this prompt list ; 3,6,7,8,9, 19, 22, 29, 30 and 31 from the kissing prompts 4 of my "SUMMER CELEBRATION" event.
Part2
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Regulus wasn't seen.
It wasn't like he wasn't at the school where you both called your home, he definetly was. There were glimpses of him in lessons, or Quidditch practices, there were slight whispers of his rich and silky voice as he spoke to his friends in the Great Hall, one that you could always catch no matter where or when. It was the same voice that whispered you sweet good mornings, the same voice that told you soft spoken, full of love and adoration, words as he danced with you in somewhere away from the prying eyes, his own blue-ish gray ones looking extra ethereal and captivating at the moonlight that shone on both of you, contouring his sharp face so beautifully that often left you speechles.
Speechles at how this amazing, caring and loving boy was yours. And he often felt the same about you, about how lucky he was for finding you in that library corner, drowning in books and hair messy, at his lowest point.
A point where no one really made it an effort to listen to him, to know him.
By his friends, his parents... His own brother.
But, even if he wasn’t heard or seen by his family, Regulus Black was seen in Hogwarts, by many others... But not you.
Not today.
He was avoiding you.
It hurted you whenever he distanced himself. He often did this, but even then, he would tell you that he just needed to be alone and gather his thoughts after a kiss to your forehead and then return a few hours later with your favourite dessert from one of the house elves. They even learnt when to bake them for him and you, after witnessing how bice you treated them and such, they were happy to stay awake a few more hours so that you two could be happy.
And of course, you understood that everyone could need some alone time in this hectic life, Regulus more than anyone, but this much of being alone...
He didn't even come to dinner time, instead saying some bullshit about wanting to sleep and tell you to eat with your friends after a soft kiss to your cheeks and a short kiss to your lips. He would always lay some on your lips, and even pepper your whole face with them. His kisses were always so passionate, they left you a breathless mess at the place he kissed you, making you jump on him as you both laughed in delight.
Be it his dorm, you would jump on the bed and you two would play fight, looking into each others eyes as he would hover over you, a hand on your waist with a thight grip as his breath fanned your face, his nose touching yours as he would muzzle his to your neck. You are beautiful, he would whisper before his kisses would turn urgent and you both’s clothes would soon be thrown away at somewhere.
Regulus Black was a passionate young man, someone who felt deeply... But that passion was slowly dying.
And it was your greatest fear coming true.
“Excuse me, guys... I don’t have an appeatite...” you slowly got up as you looked at them, apologizing with your eyes. People always thought them to be such fuckers but Barty and Evan, as long as they weren’t in their teasing romance, were actually great friends of you and Regulus... Barty was the first one who adopted you in the group, back before you were sorted in any houses, in the train and... Perhaps, you were the only one they loved in another house.
“Where are ya goin’? Ya haven’ eaten anythin’?” Barty pointed to your plate as a sheepish look came over you, lips tugging to a sweet smile, hoping that he would let it pass. He wouldn’t have fallen for the puppy eyes, not for the 97th time, had Evan not pointed to who was missing on their table as well.
“looking for her boyfriend, I see...” you gave a sad smile at Evan as he nodded to the entrance of the Great Hall. He, too, was aware that something was... more wrong with the Black as well, but none of them could come close enough to question him without getting blasted off. “Go. That boy never admits, but he is very dependant on you... He needs you.”
But, if there was anyone who could do that... And perhaps, it was you he wanted to have with him, it would be you.
He had seen from first-hand experience how good you affected the boy, how he seemed happier. Though he would always tease him for the heart eyes he sent your way, or how he would get up from his seat and hug you at the entrance of the Great Hall as soon as he sees you, and also accompany you to his side as you talked with his friends and then, sit with you in your side of the table with your friends at lunch time or dinner, he was glad he found some solace in you.
He was aware of the “pureblood nonsense” most “pureblood” families believed in, his and Blacks for example, and did anything to make their children believe in it too. Regulus was still considered lucky in his eyes, for having Sirius protecting him since he didn’t have someone that would protect him.
And now that they were friends, there was no way in hell that he would allow him to relapse into those bad thoughts that could never actualy stop swirl in his head.
You beamed at Evan as your sprinted from them, Evan yelling after you that they would bring some food for you two while Barty hissed about you not doing any funny business. Evan elbowed him hard as Barty whined about how Regulus was becoming soft, and pink, and domestic around him so much that he couldn’t take it anymore. I love our girlie, and cold bitch of a friend but they both make me... sick...
You couldn’t care less about what they said though. Your mind was only on Regulus and how in pain he looked earlier, even when he tried to hide it behind his steel look. You wondered if it was the anniversary of his brother leaving him behind, but quickly checked it out. Maybe his parents were strict and harsh to him again? But he always said he was used to their harsh ways of teaching...
And now that you stopped in front of the the door seperating you from the Slytherin Common Room... You realized that you didn’t know much about your own boyfriend as much as you were supposed to. And that thought made you frown as you looked down for a moment. You knew how... intense things can get with the “pureblood thing”, even though your family wasn’t that harsh when it came to that ideology, you could only imagine what was going on behind the Black household’s closed door by what Sirius had told you.
Pain, screams and suffering enough to make even the strongest wizard or witch cry their eyes out, just to escape, just to... end it all.
Much like the sniffles coming from insidehis dorm after you entered, sniffles that did nothing to ease your nervousness.
And there he was, your absolutely soft and loving and perfect boyfriend, laying on his side as he clutched his cushion thightly while sobbing uncontrollably , his body heaving up and down as his cries rolled off his tongue and reached your ears. Your heart clenched painfully at the heartbroken boy before you, twisting an invisible knife deeper and deeper with each of his cries as you slowly walked up to him and sat down on the bed, alerting him to your presence before putting your hand on his shoulder and caressing his shoulder comfortingly with sad eyes.
“Reggie...” you knew how he hated that nickname, even throwing a fit to Evan how he didn’t like, though he always said he preferred only you to say it, so when he didn’t react even at that name, you sprinted to his other side after applying a locking charm to the door, guessing he would want to be alone with you right now withour anyone barging in.
At first, he tried to deny you and your touch, but you were persistent. When you said yes to date him, you made a promise to him that day: even if your ways split, you would still be there for him through thick and thin.
You wouldn’t ve another person who left him alone.
“I’m not leaving, I’m here... You’re safe, Regulus...”
And perhaps, it was the way your voice so softly comforted him and how your hands glided through his black curls, or maybe he was too tired after crying his heart out. Whatever it was, he suddenly got up and launched at you, burrying his face to your neck as you sat down on your butt and swayed him from side to side like a baby. Regulus was a man who fought until his last breath, someone who rebelled silently, someone who stood on his ground so strictly that you often thought there would be nothing that could break him.
What happened to him to make him turn into a mess?
What did they do this time?
He was talking, rambling about how bad it was and how she was gonna kill him for it but you didn’t know what “it” was. Your frown hardened by each passing second as his rambles got more intense with fear, fear of his own mother.
“ I-I h-had to leave... I had to leave there, Y/N! They... They wanted-“ another choked sob raked through him as you hugged him even thighter than previously, lifting his head in a hurry and desperately searching for your eyes, to see if you believed him, if you were trully there, if you were... real.
You held onto his face softly, running your thumb up amd down through the bridge of his nose as you kissed his lips to prove to him that you were real, and he was safe in Hogwarts, making him feel all of you as his tears wet your lips, leaving a bitter taste at your tongue.
Not from the salty taste, but the pain they held.
Your mind already finished his sentence without him actually doing so. Because there was only one thing you both feared, one thing that kept him awake at most nights...
One thing that made him cry onto your shoulders that much...
“Did they... Did they do it?” your shaky whisper shook him from the half-trance he was in, and your question made you shiver as if You-Know-Who’s hands were around your neck, your shoulders, the death and chaos that followed him around reeking even in the comforting bubble you two had in Regulus’ dorm.
He shook his head as his hands twisted the silk of your robe. “No... Bella came to the house, said that she wanted to take me to him... The Dark Lord. She said it would be an honor to fight for his cause...” he paused  to gulp down the bile that rose to his throat, clenching his eyes shut and focusing on your comforting smell and warmth. He slowly calmed down and looked at you with his ocean blue eyes, wondering how it was possible for you to net be like his own family, how you were so kind and different than others. When he first saw you in the Great Hall, everyone was looking at you in awe, some were jealous and some were scared. Mostly half-bloods and muggle-borns who was now aware of your family and how in danger they were with a school full of purebloods who mostly wanted to get rid of them.
But just as your kindness and warmth eased him many times, they eased those who once feared you as you welcomed them all happily with open arms, making them promise to turn to you if something were troubling them. You proved everyone that you and your family wasn’t like those psychopaths who was hellbent on killing them, even if it made you be branded as “blood-traitor”. You didn’t seem like you cared much about it, rather spending time with your friends even when nasty Slytherins threw insults at you. All you did was to flip them off and go back to whatever you were doing...
And this was why he hesitated to talk to you at the beginning, both from his family status and the nasty comments that would be thrown at you from his house in Hogwarts. He thought you were only kind to muggle-borns and half-breeds since they were being bullied constantly and, harsh to the purebloods who insulted you.
And he was a pureblood... which meant that you would defiently flip him off and even hurt him.
Which proved to be wrong soon, when he cautiously walked up to you in potion class and asked for help as you turned around and gave him a wide smile as you patted the spot next to you. He didn’t want to think back to how close you two were as you listed the ingredients behind him and looked from his head and down at the cauldron to see if he was doing it right.
But it was the happiest he had ever been as you smiled at him and patted his back proudly as you called for the Professor and showed him your works. That was the moment he realized that he could talk to you without any fear, and also, come to you with some of his problems whether you were able to solve them or not. But perhaps, the biggest discovery about his first meeting with you was...
Knowing deep down that he would fall for you, and your dedication for those close to you.
He was proven right, and it was also a joy to realize this as much as it pained him.  He knew with what kind of burden he came, and he didn’t want to do that to you. It wasn’t fair to such a sunshine person like you. But he had been a bit more selfish than he wanted to admit in his life, and he needed a light... A hope that showed him, told him that his days that was often covered with darkness would be gone soon.
He didn’t know what he did to deserve you, to have you return his feelings almost 2 years ago, but he was so damn glad to Merlin that you were in his life, that you were his light, his saviour.
Just a few minutes ago, he was miserable and scared and didn’t know what else to do. He felt like he was cornered like a wild, hurt animal, not knowing or seeing a way out.
But at least... He had you, he would always have you.
It wasn’t like he didn't come clean with this, his family and how they supported Voldemort. It was actually one of the main reasons that even if he loved you, his heart called for you, he would never try to court you. He couldn’t bring himself to be the reason your smile would fall, the reason you would be dragged into his mess.
But still... Both of you naively thought that he had more time, that you both had more time to act like a normal couple living a pink romance.
That was what you wanted to have. For Regulus to feel safe and happiness, away from the tragedy that was his family.
Apparently, Merlin had other plans.
“B-But... You’re still in school? I thought they wouldn’t...” your voice died down as horror filled you for what was coming to your ways. You were aware of their bond with the Dark Lord, and that they would make either him or Sirius join the DeathEaters too. Sirius was safe now that he ran away and seeked help from James, and you were happy for him. Sirius, James and Remus were your friends anyways, you loved hanging out with them or tutoring them.
Which meant almost all the time.
They were nice people, happy to help you at any time and anywhere, or well, every person who they loved and cherished...
That was exactly why you didn’t understand when Sirius appeared in James’ house alone, leaving his little brother, 14 at that time, alone in such a “hellhole”.
Alone and defenceless, crying much like now as he curled in a ball...
But deep down, you knew that Sirius was worried about him too. You knew him, and listened to him as he cried to you about how he wasn’t used to feeling safe and how worried sick he was for his brother. Something must have happened for Regulus to not let him come with his brother, and Sirius to not drag him away from that house.He, after all, was a stubborn little shit whether the situation was good or not.
 But whatever it was that made both of them not to talk for months and reconcile, it came back to bite everyone’s ass.
“I know, love... I know...” he kissed the tip of your nose as he tried to comfort you back, feeling your fear as his. That was one of the reasons why he fell for you: You felt everyone’s pain even when they really didn’t deserve it.
And though he liked watching you get protective and help someone out while he stood behind and admired you, the tears sitting at the corner of your lovely eyes did nothing but break him even more as he wiped them away, kissing just under your eyes softly, afraid of inflicting you with even more pain.
“That’s what I said, that I should finish school first but... Mother said it was full of dirty wizards and witches, muggleborns and half-bloods. She said I was better off without all those scums....” your brows furrowed at how Walburga Black was so... full of hatred at those who wasn’t like her, her sons included. You probably never saw another human who was so full of hatred, her negativity pouring as venom, trying to poison everyone just as she once was. You had a good guess of why she was like this, why she always threw hatred and so many curses on practically everyone.
After all, none of her sons turned out to be like the Black family. Both of them didn’t support the “Pureblood nonsense” like they did, and Sirius was brave enough to rebel against them while Regulus did it more silently. He showed himself to be just like the perfect Black heir, did everything they asked for and stood tall against them.
He wasn’t brainwashed by them, and though they weren’t proud of him- and could never be- You were so damn proud for him, just like a certain older brother.
You didn’t know it but Regulus, had it been not for you, he feared he would have actually believed in them and what they said, solely for the reason that he wanted them to love him, to acknowledge him as a son. They wanted perfection and he wanted to be perfect, he needed to be perfect.
Because if he wasn’t... Who would he be to anyone?
You are Regulus Arcturus Black, he remembers you telling him after he finally came clean to you about what was in his mind, after asking you out. He was so sure you would decline, laugh it off or anything remotely that told him you didn’t feel the same, before he felt your soft hands slowly taking hold of his downcasted head as his eyes widened in surprise at how... content you looked with the same smile that ignited a fire deep in his soul that it never died, and would never do.. And you are a great man who is kind, strong and powerful, brave too! You are my favourite person in the whole world and I’ll spend an eternity reminding of who you are... Starting with, my boyfriend.
Silence scretchted between you two as he smiled softly at the memory, a perfect one to cast a Patronus perhaps. He desperately wished that this was one of those times you sneaked into his dorm for a nightly fate when he would for sure know that you would scare away all the demons in his head...
But unfortunately, the reality was something else. Something even more demonic and evil than the usual nightmares that haunted him.
Something that tore both him and you apart by how scary it was.
“What did you do... Regulus, did you do it?” he didn’t speak, just took your hands and put them on his sleeve, wanted you to look yourself. Because he didn’t have enough energy anymore. Suddenly, as you slowly pulled his sleeve up, the reality of what would have happened if he didn’t fight against them crashed him.
He would never see you saunter into the Great Hall every time, he wouldn’t sneak out in the middle of the night to have a late night date with you, he wouldn’t be the one to walk with you to your next class, he wouldn’t wait for you for food, he wouldn’t go to Hogsmeade and look at you as you begged to have some more candy from Honey &Dukes, he wouldn’t watch as yougot embrassed cutely...
He wouldn’t be there to love you, and you wouldn’t be there to love him.
You took a sharp intake of breath as you felt his skin over his dress shirt, as if somehow, you would feel the dark tint of the skull and snake symbol over his forearm. You would never judge him, never dare to do such thing. How could you, when you knew how much pain he would have to endure for it, knowing how much it would hurt him?
If that happened, if he yielded and accepted-or rather forced to- you would surely feel helpless and scared, for him. But then, there would absolutely be nothing stopping you from taking him to safety, and possibly going apeshit crazy at them for doing something, something he didn’t want to, on him.
“I just... I just wanted to be enough, for them t-to just... love us.” Your heart broke as stray tears escaped your eyes at how broken he sounded, how even amidst his pain, he still cated for his brother. Regulus took your silence and gasp as a bad sign, he murmured sadly with his eyes downcasted once more as he rubbed your tender flesh. He already felt like a total douchebag, including the voice that screamed at him that he was just like his family with you crying in front of him and him not being able to do anything, that he didn’t deserve anything good in life. And your soft cries didn’t help how he already felt helpless either.
“Don’t cry, love... I know that’s stupid but-“
“No it's no... Not if it’s making you feel like this...” you murmured as you took his hand between yours, squeezing his elegant and long fingers one by one as a way to comfort him as he smiled down at you, seated on his bed as the silky green color complimented you in the best way possible. His eyes looked at your body as the light casted on you made you look ethereal and take his breath away with your beauty. He looked down at your hands as they caressed his hands and wrist comfortingly, before pulling it up to reveal... smooth skin, without any dark ink covering it.
But...
Your hands stopped at feeling a bump on his perfect skin... A bump that wasn’t to be there... Alongside with bruises and yellow-ish tints on his arm...
“T-They... They did crucio o-on you?” you stammered out as you lofted his arm closer to yourself, looking between him and the bruises he had with wide eyes.
“Bella...” he said sadly as his hands clutched your arm thight, as if his life depended on you. And in a way, it did. You were his whole life, the only thing he had, and he would be nothing without you. “She did it, later mother beat me and threw insults and crucio at me...”
“I didn’t even say anything at first... Until she included you.  How she would destroy you, ruin you since you were being a distraction to me and what was more important.” He explained as he took your hands between his and kissed them, a gesture that often left you a blushing mess, and continued. “That’s when I decided that it was enough. That all the pain she inflicted on us, on me was over. I had a life, my life... I would never let her or anyone hurt you, so I fought back and... well, you know the rest.” He mumbled shyly as he peered at you, trying to determine what the effect of his words were to you. Flushed cheeks and wide eyes? That’s something he expected. Shuffling like a cat in embrassment? Also expected, that was something you usually did with him which was another thing that he found adorable.
But what wasn’t expected was what left your mouth.
“I’ve always loved that about you...” you whispered out eith softest eye possible and this time, it was the Regulus Black who blushed.
“What do you mean?”
You shrugged your shoulders as he frowned, but upon you not looking at him and the sudden urge to hide yourself, he smirked and threw his arms around your waist to pull you against him as he nuzzled his face to your neck while your hands played with his curls. He was glad that once sad and bad vibe left to a more pleasant and happy one as he shared this moment with you, with hugging and kissing.
You giggled as the ticklish feeling his lips left on yourbskin made you groan while trying to stop him, so that you could get those words out. You loved his kisses and how they made you feel, but you had to say this... Or else it would eat you alive, and then you would be frowning the whole next day.
“I mean-hey, stop! I’m trying to be romantic here!” you swatted his hand away as it slowly slithered upwards aling the expanse of your naked back, ruhhing circles on the flesh there as he hummed. “I thought it was my thing, love?”
“Yeah, but now, I changed it! It’s mine now, you did it a lot. Now, will you please listen, my pretty and handsome boyfriend?”
“Hmm... Gotta think, love... Maybe after a kiss?” he wiggled his brows playfully as you rolled your eyes but did so, smiling into the soft and lingering kiss you both shared.
Ugh, this boy... Always looking for way to smooch me...
“Now that you had your kiss,” you said after being parted from him, panting at the intensity of the kiss and trying hard to not dive back at the sight of his pink and swollen lips, you continued with a finger idly rubbing his lips and then his beauty mark under his chin.
“I love your brave heart. Even if you might not think so, you have been standing up against them for so long and you, protecting me even if I wasn’t there further proves it...” you looked at him with a kind look and took his hand to place it on your chest, right where your heart was as you continued.
“I love how you always know how to make me smile, no one makes me smile the way you do, my days better and surprise me. I love how you always seem like you don’t care but actually listen when there is something we, any of us, want or when something is bothering us.”
“I love how thoughtful you are, even when it breaks you... Just like how when Sirius left home, and you came to me crying. Not because you felt anger or hatred, which would have been understanable by the way, but rather joy. Joy, because you knew that it was a new start for him so that he could live a normal life even if it killed you.” A scoff left you in the middle of your speech  remembering how your best friend left his little brother like that but soon disappeared when you remembered how broken he was when he talked about his brother.
Regulus, though, was in shock. Because no one in his life had ever been that thoughful and attentive to the way he felt. No one really saw what was hidden behind his strong façade but yet again, you weren’t “no one” and he was always going to be understood.
From now on, and until forever.
“you don’t think I’m... broken? Bad?” he mumbled as he looked at you through his lashes, head down but still smiling. Your heart soared for the boy before you and you leant down to capture his lips with yours, but not before uttering one lost heartfelt sentence.
“All I know is that I love you, that you deserve everything good in life.”
Regulus sniffled once more as he accepted your kiss, humming happily as he allowed you to deepen it. Little shocks went through his body and he wondered if you felt it too but didn’t dwell on it more. He only accepted your unconditional love.
“I know I don’t say it out loud much, but I really do love you so much... You’re all I’ll ever need to feel better.”
“And I love you, love... So much.” You whispered silently, kissing the topnof his head as he thightened his hold on you. Everything was nice and silent once more, only the sounds from the crickets and owls reaching both of your ears. You kissed his head, his forehead and cheek contionously while he laughed, genuinely laughed since he came back, while trying to make you stop. He knew trying to physically stop you wouldn’t work, so he opted for other ways.
Like, kissing you desperately from your neck as he breathed out to tour most sensitive part of the column of your neck, gracefully out only for him to kiss, to mark.
And he wasn’t wrong. When you felt his hot lips on your neck trailing wet and fast kisses up and down your neck, you gasped and let him do as he wanted. Your legs opened for him to step between them, hovering over you with both of his hands on each side of your head as he gazed at you with love and clear desperation. At that moment, you two weren’t just two lovers who were fucking around.
You two were soulmates that understood each other on another level.
He suddenly stopped his ministrations and just looked down at you from above you for a few seconds before sighing dejectedly.
“I don’t want to live there... But I don’t know where-“
“You are not going back to that place, Regulus. Not again, I won’t allow it.” You sternly cut him as you rose up on your hands, brows knitted together while you pushed yourself up as he lowered back and looked at you as if you were crazy.
“B-but... I have nowhere else to go! They would cut me off of the tapestry and disown me! Sirius had James and-“ he exclaimed in distress as he started to shake again, shaking his head at the sudden panic of the reality and what he was supposed to do. He was so caught up in the comfort he had after so long that he had forgotten about what was waiting for him.
His mother with her wand out to use even mkre gruesome punishments, forcing him to come to their meeting and kill innocents...
He couldn’t get help if they did it, and how would his brother look at him if he were to get that damned mark? He already didn’t consider him as a brother, he would definetly refuse to have anything to do with him after he sees it.
And you? How would you accept him like that? A vicious killer who would have to work for the Dark Lord even if it was the last thing he wanted?
You wouldn’t deserve it, you wouldn’t want it, you wouldn’t love him, you wouldn’t accept him, he would be all alone and then be killed as-
“And you have me..! You could stay with me and my family, you know they would do anything to protect us.”
Your desperate call for him was what made him come back to his senses, from the panic attack he had at just thinking about the possibilities. He didn’t register what you said at first. Inside his mind, there seemed to be a constant whirl and buzzing sound as if he was fighting back against a huge storm and he was just... trying, trying and trying but failing in the end.
But it was because he tried to do it alone. He was never allowed to ask for help since it was a “sign of weakness” as his father called it, but now that he had a different circle of people, different friends and above all you, he didn’t have to fear anything.
The way Regulus broke down at the mere mention of his family house( something that was supposed to be comforting) broke you, the sight of the kind boy you knew being treated that way... You couldn’t allow it anymore. There was no way you were letting him go to that house, back into Walburga’s waiting arms as she was waiting to point that damned wand to her own son and mercilessly torture him.
And, to prevent it, a bright idea came to your mind. Sure, there was a potential that your parents would be shocked, more likely have questions as to why they were hosting the boy but thwy would understand... and hopefully help him out.
“You know how my mum adores you, they would gladly help us both.” You weren’t lying to comfort him or yourself, it was true. Last summer, when you brought him to your house after he told something about his whereabouts to his mother, he stayed with you and he would always be thankful for what you did for him that summer. Because those 3 months were the best he had in a long time. At first, when he witnessed the pure love and care there was between all of you, he felt jealous and angry.
Jealous because he didn’t have, and could never have, what you had. He felt the bitter pangs of knives every time you kissed your parents, they brought you home made meals to your room as you showed him the cool muggle books or listened to songs on your bed as you held hands and looked at each other with lovesick smiles. The way you bravely sneaked into the guest room just to fall asleep with him, to comfort him so that he didn’t feel alone changed him in a way, made him more brave.
You didn’t have to know, but your mum always checked on him during night to see if he was doing fine and smiled whemever she saw you both sleeping while hugging each other as if your lives depended on it.
But even when he was jealous of you and your parents, though never serious, he had a clear mind to judge the situation and then... he realized how they included him to their casual lifes as well, just like you did.
It was like a famy thing, huh?
How your mother requested him to come to the kitchen and later taught him how to cook some meals, tasted what she cooked and even helped her out around the house all the while listening to her talk shit about almost every family in the wizarding world, except Weasleys, with a huge smile on his face.
He could never dare to do that in his own house, but here, in your own... He was sitting with your mother on the kitchen with a cup of tea and biscuits while they talked and talked. She took after her mother, both inner and outer beauty, he would think as he gazed at the way your mum talked and even threw some praises at him here and there which didn’t fail to make him blush.
He really wanted to be a part of that life, he needed it... He had never been happier than he was at that time and to hear you say that he could be...
“I can? You... Promise?” he hopefully asked with tears in his eyes as you nodded uour head immediately, bringing him for yet another hug as you kissed his nape softly.
“Yes, I promise. You and I, forever and then even more... Remember?” he suddenly surged forward and took your face in his hands, inhaling your shampoo before diving for a passionate kiss as his hands wrapped themselves around your waist and pulled you to his lap. He poured all his love and gratitude into it, teeth clashing together as his lips and tongue desperately searched for yours.
You squealed but then moaned slightly at how hot you suddenly felt, how his movements and kiss heated you up more than normal. This kiss wasn’t normal, this side of Regulus wasn’t normal. He normally was someone who showed his love silently, who kissed you under shadows. You understood it well, he wasn’t a man who liked to show off with physcial affection and rather made his silent care work its magic.
But right now, this Regulus was fragile and sensitive, and his desperate kisses showed it too as he wanted you to... know it.
And Merlin, did you know it...
You held onto his neck and hair as your lips moved against his lips, leaning him back amd making him lay on his back as your body laid on his flush, chest to chest. The kiss was everything you both wanted, it has been so long since he deprivee both himself and you from each other but it wasn’t the time for it to lead to something more.
Not when he was so in pain, and need of comfort.
Besides, there was something else that needed to be talked about if you were doing what you were planning to do. Some people that needed to know, who would gladly move the entire universe for the boy below you
You shyly looked at him with a troubled look and Regulus’ brows knitted together as he worriedly took a hold of your face in his warm palms. “Is something wrong, my love? Was it too much?”
You looked at him in amazement, the fact that he still thought about your comfort when he was the one who needed it bedazzled you. But like you said, it was a trait you loved about him, perhaps the the best one.
You shook your head while taking a huge breath in. “No, love... It was quite... enjoyable.” You flushed under his teasing smirk, cursing at him for making you feel like a little kid being offered candy inside your mind as you cleared your throat and got off of him to sit next to where his body was now leaned back against the head of his bed. He was looking at you with confusion and slight worry, wondering ehat was on your mind as his hand wandered to your knee and rubbed it gently. To not give him any more scare any longer, you took in his glorious sight and continued.
“There are two more people who you could turn for help to.”
That was something you both talked about a lot, who he would turn to if shit went wrong and he had to act quick with his escape. You always knew that Regulus shouldn’t stay in that house even a moment longer, but he insisted that he was fine and assured you that everything was under his control with a swift kiss to your forehead.
So you kept your silence. You didn’t talk about it again until he would want to, but still... You told Sirius about the awful things they did to Regulus as he listened with clenched jaw and asked him if there was anything he could help with when the time comes.
Not if... When.
Because everyone knew that the inevitable was waiting right outside the door, and there was no stopping it.
And he of course, immediately offered himself which you declined for the time being since Regulus still believed that he hated his brother. You watched how broken he suddenly seemed after you said it but still nodded, knowing how he fucked everything up by not grabbing him with himself as he left, and gavr you their uncle’s name.
“He is a good man, also like us who didn’t believe in their ways... If there is anyone that could help, it’s him.”
Regulus tilted his head to you as if asking what you meant,  how the hell it was possible that there would be more people who could help him, and with a sigh, you looked at his eyes. “Your uncle Alphard and... Sirius.”
“No... My uncle? That’s fine. But Sirius... He hates me, love. He showed me how he felt about me! He wouldn’t want anything to do with me!” he got up from his bed hastily in panic and went to the open window as he leant over it with his hands in his hair, welcoming the fresh and cool air into his lungs.
You understood where he was coming from, knowing little pieces about how that night went between them and how he... did a lot for Sirius that night, something he didn’t know and probably would never. Some harsh words were apparently exchanged between them and even if they both knew that the other didn’t mean it...
It didn’t hurt any less.
Regulus thought that Sirius chose James over his own brother and hated him for being the way he is.
Sirius thought his little brother wad ashamed of the person he was, how he always caused trouble even as toddlers and made him get hurt even though he would mostly be the one taking the blame for him.
And you thought that the Black brothers were stupidest motherfuckers in the whole world.
Your arms fell helplessly on the bed as you watched Regulus break down, almost, again. You never felt this helpless in your life, and your gut told you that the reason of his agitation was partly because he hated himself for making you go through this, but...
You promised him one year ago that no matter what happens, you would be there for him.
Always.
“No, my love... Sirius loves you and cares about you. I know, because I listened to him as he cried in James’ house.” You walked up to him slowly, took his hand and stood before him as your hand crept up towards his sculpted face and rubbed his cheek softly before tiptoeing and kissing each side of his cheek as he smiled and exhaled slowly.
At that time, things were tense for them. So much so that it affected the school as well.  Sirius was still on edge because of his parents, worried sick for both Regulus and himself, thinking that they were planning something evil about himself. Regulus was hurt because his brother left him, for James, and even called him his “brother” which didn’t seem anything friendly to the poor, young boy who was drowning in his insecurities. It didn’t matter that he was already thinking about also running away, to you probably, but he wasn’t abandoning a brother for another one in his eyes and therefore blamed Sirius for being selfish.
But, as much as you understood both Regulus’ frustration and Sirius’ anger, you also knew that your friend and the older brother of your lover would drop everything to help his little brother out of that shithole.
“Just... Talk to him. Because I know you, you would regret not doing so if you don’t do it.” You sighed out tiredly, the later hours into the night catching up to you as you begged him softly, hoping that he would accept. A part of you feared that he wouldn’t, and tey to solve this by himself like always...
But you were his weakness, the reason he rebelled back and changed his future unknown to either one of you.
He would kill for you, die for you, live for you and turn the whole universe upside down if he had the power.
“Okay... Will you... Will you also be there? For me?” he softly smiled and kissed your nose, leaning his forehead to yours as he waited for your answer with a small smile. You smiled before kissing him deeply, slowly as your lips lingered on his and he closed his eyes slowly as if to savour this moment. You tugged him towards bed with a whine. “ Forever and always... Now, come back to bed.”
At that, a playful smirk found his face since you came in his room. “Now, I thought we could get to that lever later in our relationship, love.” You blushed heavily at how that one innocent sentence seemed so... cozy and something a married couple would say. You hid your face at the sudden flashes of you two being married, living your dreams in a cottage far way from everyone came before your eyes before punching his arm. It didn’t do anything of course, that boy was fit contrary to what people thought by his lanky figure, except making him laugh and kiss your hairline.
“You’re so adorable when you blush... Alright, let’s go and sleep.” You smiled as you watched him get under his duvet and groan in relief when he found a good position to sleep, blushing at how the expanse of his back flexed with each of his movements. You sighed in relief at seeing that he would finally fall into a comforting sleep and moved to quitely get out of his dorm when his monotone yet curious voice reached you, halting you in your steps.
“And, where do you think you are going?” he asked matter of factly as you stood there like a deer, with a hand on the doorknob as you slowly turned to look at him sitting down on his bed and laying halfway down with his torso out. “Uh... Going back to my dorm?”
“And who said you could?” he raised a brow at you questioningly as you laughed awkwardly, turning fully to him with your arms crossed in front of your chest as you looked down at him hesitated.
“I thought you would want to... be-“
“Trust me, love, being alone is the last thing I need right now... I need you...” he shyly said, his cockiness suddenly disappearing as he opened the duvet and offered you to come and sleep with him. His chuckle of disbelief made you scoff at him as you went up to him and got under it without making him repeat himself. He chuckled once more as he pulled you towards him, snuggling to you as your arms wrappes around him and soon you both fell asleep to the comforting embrace of your lover.
When he arrived in his room, he was terrified of going back to Grimmauld House and be forced to accept the Dark Lord’s way. He felt as if there was no other option for him, and he even mentally prepared himself to break up with you to save you from the tragedy. But as you slowly came back to his bed and sat down before inching closer to him and settling right next to him on the single bed, your bodies flushed together as you laid your hand on his chest, right where his heart was beating loudly, he felt hope blossom in his chest.
Even if he chuckled and tried to play the cool Regulus to hide how these all meant a lot to him
He fell asleep peacefully with you between his arms and this time, rather than those nightmares that decorated his dreams as he only saw his mother and the red hue of the cruciotus curse, he now dreamed of future.
A future where he was happy with you, in a country-side...
A future where you would be waiting for him with just as warm and soft embrace, continuing to lighten his days just as you are doing just by existing...
A future where he is safe and happy, with the family you two might create, a family that would be completely different than the one he has.
And, for the first time in 16 years, he had a good nights of smorning.yoy btoh laid under his duvet together, not caring about the teasing he would face the next morning.
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anikasheep · 6 months
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OM Brothers in Replaced MC AU
Afab mc, chubby mc, ooc brothers and don't argue with me. No beta read and English is not my first language
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Leviathan: It's all Mammon's fault.
Mammon: What the...? How could this is my fault?! I'm not the one read the story of some stranger post on Internet. So it's totally your fault, Levi!
Asmo: Could you two stop fighting pleeease?
Satan: I agree, it's no time to blame, my power is weakening, so does my wrath.
Belphie: Yeah, I don't feel drowsy as usual, I wonder why. How are you feeling, Beel?
Beel: I'm hungry, but the hunger is less than before.
Mammon: Just what story we're stucked, huh? Yo, Levi, spill all the beans.
Levi: It's a fanfiction that someone wrote about the seven lords abandoned Henry for another human. Yet it's also a demon au so the writer use ours name as the seven lords' casual name. In the fanfic, we met another human exchange student and we were fond of them. And then we forget Henry, we started to dislike him and we even abuse him with verbally or physically. Henry was so sad and heartbroken that he decided to leave the Devildom forever. The seven lords finally realized their mistakes but Henry was dead when they rush to human world.
Mammon:... Okay, totally don't know what the fuck are you talking about.
Lucifer: So what's our roles? The seven lords?
Satan: I don't think so, cause there's no reason our powers weakening if we are the seven lords.
Levi: But I don't remember there's any other characters. So I guess we're kind of break the rules in this world? Like we're the OP or the bug in this world? Just like the anime......
Belphie: Shut up, Levi.
Satan: I read this fanfic before, too. And I agree with Levi. Still, I am curious about this place where we are. The starter always hide something important to know the world and the whole event after all.
Levi:Umm...I believe this place is where Henry lives shortly after the brothers cast him out. But I can't remember its name.
Asmo: This house have a name? Just like the House of Lamentation?
Levi: Exactly!...And I think the short name of this house also is HOL! Ugh, just why can't I remember its name!!
Lucifer: Levi, if what you and Satan said is true, then I think it's natural that you can't recall this house's name. Cross his arms.
Levi: Eh?
Satan: Nods Well, It's normally if the name of this house is one of the important clue in this story, so you could only remember that when the story near end right?
Levi: Sob Th- thank you, you two...
Belphie: I don't get much you three said, but if we the the characters that didn't exist in the original story, then what's the purpose of we were stucked in here?
Mammon:...Oi! Is that...MC?
All the brothers turn to the place where Mammon points at. There you are, sitting outside the house, alone and stareing down at your phone, you're trembling.
Asmo: Eh? Why are they sitting alone in the street? It's dangerous for a human!
Asmo is ready to walk toward you but Lucifer grabs his collar.
Asmo: Lucifer!!
Lucifer: We could keep an eye on them from here, but how could you explain to them who we are if you just ran into them?
Asmo: *pout*
Satan: Then, we could use some fake name as the casual name we use in this world.
Lucifer: You mean like in the human world, SULLY?
Satan: *grit his teeth* I swear to Diavolo, if you call me that stupid name again...
Lucifer: *smirk*
Levi: Meh, here we go again.
Mammon: They are just like cat and dog, aren't they? Still, we should think some names so we could meet MC ASAP, stop being foolish.
Lucifer/Satan: *TSK*
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thesassypadawan · 21 days
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Lose Myself (Knight Anakin x FemReader)
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Summary: It’s been one month since you’ve seen your dashing knight, since you’ve last held him in your arms. Longing to say those simple words to him, you sing your heart out every night…until he returns to you. (Song that was used is ‘Lose Myself’ by JC Chasez)
Warnings: 18+ (minors dni), because of all the lovely smut. Just good old-fashioned love making…and Ani’s big dick.
Notes: Happy Hayden's (And Mine) Birthday Event! In honor of the man, the myth, the legend; I will be posting nothing but Anakin, Vader, and Hay stories all April long!
A little something for @kombatkid! It was truly a pleasure to write this! I had a lot of fun trying out this writing style!  Hope you like it! ❤️
Funnel Flowers are native to Tatooine.
“This next one is for someone special. Wherever you may be, I hope you know how much I love you…how badly I want to say those words to you.”
This music begins to swell. Gazing out at the small cantina crowd, you bring the mic to your lips…and begin to sing softly. Your mind wandering.
Yeah, yeah-yeah…
One month…
He loves Funnel Flowers, and…
He keeps 'em on his window sill
When the wind blows his smell fills the room…
One month since you last saw him…
Last held or touched him…
Last laid with him…
He dreams in color…
But does he know that I love him…
I'm swimming in my abyss of insecure blue, yeah…
Hands slid up your shirt…
Pulling it off your body…
Peppering kisses on your bare skin…
And I'm losing my head..
And I can't get no sleep…
(No sleep)
But if I reached out…
(Reached out)
Would you reach out for me, yeah…
Biting your lip, you watched him strip…
Slowly, tantalizingly…
Walls fluttering as he pulled down his pants…
Purring when his hard length was revealed…
Knocked unconscious, walking on water…
Cause I'm thinking of you…
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
And don't you know that love's intoxicating and I need the abuse…
(Need the abuse)
Because I'm endlessly falling…
You're my destiny calling what you're making me do…
(Destiny calling what you're making me do)
It's all because I lose myself in you…
All because I lose myself in you…
Hovering above, face mere inches away…
He captured your lips, mouth melding with yours…
Kissing you passionately, deeply…
Fingers following and trailing the curves of your body…
Caressing, squeezing along the way…
Muttering softly…
“Perfect, you’re absolutely perfect…”
I don't want to be invisible…
(Invisible)
I just want to be compatible…
Longing for something that can only be filled by you, yeah…
Hiking your legs over his hips…
His blue eyes darkened…
Length rubbing against your slick lips…
Cause I'm fighting with my confidence…
(Confidence)
Build up my courage, give myself a chance…
Because the only thing I think about is you…
A whimper escaped you…
Soothing voice and words met your ears…
“Are you ready for me, hatari?”
Do you know that I'm here…
Do I even exist…
I'd dance on velvet skies…
For just the thought of one kiss, yeah…
Heart stuttered; face grew warm…
You felt like you were the only one who mattered…
The only one he would ever…
“Yes, need you…”
Knocked unconscious, walking on water…
Cause I'm thinking of you…
(Thinking of you, thinking of you)
And don't you know that love's intoxicating and I need the abuse…
(Need the abuse)
Because I'm endlessly falling…
You're my destiny calling what you're making me do…
(Destiny calling what you're making me do)
It's all because I lose myself in you…
All because I lose myself in you…
Lining up with you.
His hand rubbed up and down your thigh…
You shared a knowing smile…
“Then I won’t keep you waiting…”
Rolling…
Cock slid into your warmth…
Stretching you out so deliciously…
I see the beauty in your strength, baby…
And you fight to keep it in you, yea…
But I break down your walls…
(Break down your walls)
With my army of love…
(Army of love)
Taking a shaky breath, your chest heaved…
A twinge of pain shot up your spine…
Quickly overridden by overwhelming pleasure…
“Oh, Ani…”
Take a journey through my heart…
It's a test of fate…
(Test of fate)
As we hold each other close our spirits gravitate…
(Gravitate)
Let's drift into forever…
As our boundaries melt away…
His hips sat flushed with yours…
Cock seated deeply inside you…
Palms slid up, settling on your sides…
Squeezing and kneading hungrily…
“You look so beautiful right now…”
Thinking of you, thinking of you, thinking of you…
Oh...
Dragging slowly back, your vision filled with stars…
Rocking forward, left you a babbling mess…
I found myself intoxicated by this drug…
Sent to my knees cause I'm addicted to your love…
All because I lose myself in you…
All because I lose myself in you…
Pace steady, near desperate…
Your hands gripped his biceps, nails digging in…
The feeling of him on top of you, skin to skin…
Fingers toying with your clit, tears pricking at your eyes…
All because I lose, I lose myself in you…
All because I lose myself in you…
Back arched as he thrusted into you…
Hitting that spot over and over again…
If you share with me…
Then I'll find you…
And I'll meet you there…
Down in nowhere…
Soft whines fell from your lips…
“I’m so close…together…”
A low groan slipped from his…
“Together…”
If you share with me…
Then I'll find you…
And I'll meet you there…
Down in nowhere…
You released all over his aching cock…
He spilled deep within your needy cunt…
Walls clenching to milk him for every last drop…
His hips bucking a few times before coming to a still…
Baby my life is yours…
Just open up the door…
I can't believe I found you, yeah-yeah…
Basking in the afterglow…
You shot him a beautiful smile…
Eyes shining in admiration…
'Cause if you share with me…
Then I'll find you…
And I'll meet you there…
Down in nowhere…
Pressing a soft kiss to your lips…
He muttered a breathless…
“I adore you…”
And gently pulled out…
Down in nowhere…
One month…
Yeah-yeah, oh…
Lose myself, yeah…
Yeah...
Oh...
The room was silent, before erupting in cheers and applause. Scanning the faces one last time, you took a small bow. “Thank you.”
Leaving the makeshift stage, your heart is heavy until…
“Didn’t know you’d miss me that much, angel.” There was Anakin, leaning against a stack of crates…his arms crossed over his chest.
Your eyes lit up and a small smile crossed your face. “Maybe just a little.”
Wrapping your arms around his waist, you’re engulfed by his. Kissing one another softly, tenderly. You finally whispered those words that you had longed to say. “Love you.”
“Love you too,” he muttered back, forehead pressed against yours. “Now what do you say we head back to your apartment? Maybe get lost in each other for a whole week?”
“Yeah,” you giggled. “Down in nowhere.”
@espinathena-17, @myheartwillgoon2022, @cacti5539, @wifeofasith, @princessswifie, @kenobiskywalker16, @loverforoldermen
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toulousegrandex · 3 months
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A Journey of Solitude
Azriel x oc
Part 1: Prelude
There was a small village outside of the city of Verlaris, in the middle of a forest that only a certain few knew about. Rhysand had founded the village a century ago, when he banned the clipping of wings in the Illyrian villages. It was a safe haven for those who were abused and tortured by the hands of his own. A safe haven for Illyrian women and children.
Juniper had been rescued and brought to the village just two weeks ago. She had been told multiple times by the ladies that she was free to explore the grounds and do as she pleased, but she was still yet to leave the confinements of the little room she was given.
She had been brought into the room once she'd been cleared from the medical wing. The lady that guided her told her that the room, as well as the clothes that hung in the wardrobe and the pillows that sat on top of the bed, were all hers. A concept she couldn't quite comprehend. From birth until the moment she had been dragged away from the camp she was brought up in, she had been told that every hair on her head belonged to her father. The tears she shed, the blood she spilled, the wings that once grew from her back. She was his to do as he pleased.
Juniper, up until now had known her place in this world, all this new found freedom made her feel sick to her stomach. So she stayed in that little room, her mind drifting in and out of reality. Her body sinking through the bed until she she was hidden once again.
"Sweetheart?" A woman's voice called from the door, "I'm sorry to scare you, I was knocking and you didn't answer, I started to worry." Juniper didn't reply, yet the woman's smile didn't fault. "I came to ask if you wanted to join my daughter, Rosie and I in the craft room today?"
Juniper shook her head so fast she thought for a second, it might just spin off her neck. The woman's smile softened this time in sympathy, “Okay sweetheart, when you're ready we'll always be around." With that the door closed.
Everyday for two weeks, someone had come in to ask her if she wanted to join them in crafting, gardening, reading, writing, even dancing. In all honesty she had never done any of the things they were asking of her and shook her head to save herself the embarrassment of asking what they even were. She wasn’t ready to leave that little room. The throbbing she felt across her face, from the cuts and bruises that still lingered, were a constant reminder that she couldn't settle in here.
He'd always have his mark on her.
Rhysand had been called into the village earlier that day to meet a young woman, who he was told had been through unimaginable torture by unknown Illryans hands. A common battle he was still trying to fight and needed to whittle out the camps who were still continuously breaking his rules. He had thought bringing the spymaster along would be the best way to get some information from the silent girl.
"She hasn’t moved from her room yet." Connie, the older bubbly woman appointed to looking after the village, guided them down the hallway. "We’ve all tried, she won’t speak at all, let alone tell us which camp she comes from. She’s been through a lot, and the sudden change hasn’t settled in yet.” She spoke to the two men.
Azriel, who walked behind the two, hadn’t heard a word of what they had been speaking of since she first greeted him. As soon as he had landed his feet in the village, his heart had felt as though someone had punched through his chest and was squeezing it to torture him slowly. If he thought it was painful at the enterence, then he felt as though he was on his death bed now.
Connie knocked softly before opening a bright blue door at the end of the hallway and his heart must of stopped completely. A young woman was lying on the small bed pushed against the window, her head snapping up as soon as she heard them enter. Once his dull eyes met hers, he felt it. She was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his 300 years of living. A snap echoed through his brain, ricocheting off the walls of his skull, stopping only once it had reached his heart to restart it again. Pain left his body immediately and was transferred into relief. An overwhelming sense of relief. The emotions that hit him all at once were so over powering that he thought he might not be able to stop his legs from running towards her in a moment.
He couldn't believe it. All his life he had dreamed of a mate and here she was, he was already planning out their entire life together just at the sight of her. Their house, their kids-
The woman jumped up to push herself back up against the wall, her eyes wide in fear. She cradled herself, bringing her knees up to her chest, dropping her head and covering herself with her arms. The sound of her crying was just as painful as the build up to meeting her.
"Juniper, sweetheart-“ Connie started to walk towards her before Rhysand ushered them all out of the room.
“Maybe we should come back after she’s adjusted a bit more.” He spoke once they had shut the door back behind them. Sneaking a glance at Azriel, who looked as though he was ready to vomit. “I don’t think she’s up for a questioning, especially by scary Illryans with wings.”
“Maybe that’s best. I’ll be sure to keep you updated my lord.” Connie smiled in sympathy to the two males, specifically the one covered by shadows. “Nothing to be upset about, I know this sort of thing is hard to see.”
She didn’t know the half of it he thought.
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dairy-farmer · 1 month
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Jason's life had always been about fighting. He had to survive domestic abuse with his piece of shit father and suffering from addiction mom. Than he chose to fight for innocent people, when Bruce adopted him. After he died, fighting was all he had left. It never even occurred to him to try and start a new life as a civilian.
Then, after suffering from headaches, nausea and fainting for some time, Tim went through examination and found out that he has a brain tumor. He underwent a surgery and was left with a horrible outcome: he couldn't move, talk, take care of himself.
Bruce found him a nurse, because no one could be there the whole time with him. When Bruce introduced them and softly explained to Tim that the woman is going to be his caretaker, Tim turned pale, his breathing got shallow and his body started shaking. Bruce had to ask nurse to leave, only after Tim calmed down.
Jason honestly doesn't know, how Bruce expected Tim to trust with his life to a complete stranger, considering the business they were in. It was obvious that they needed to find someone, who he already knew. In the meantime they will take turns taking care of him. Except that didn't work out as well. Damian was a kid, who tried to kill Tim, do he was out of question from the start, Alfred had too many responsibilities, and Dick and Bruce had emergencies constantly. The first time Dick called Jason to ask to sit with him for a few hours, feed him, etc, Jason wasn't happy about it, but he had no problem with Tim. Poor kid didn't ask to suffer so much, so Jason spoonfed him, read him a book, talked at him about his adventures with the Outlaws, joked about Dick and his poor choices. He even made Tim smile weakly.
Next time he was asked to play nurse, he was ready. Tim's face light up when he saw him, and Jason thought that it's not all bad.
"Hey Timmy, ready to hear more about miss Bennet's adventures?"
At some point Jason just... Stopped leaving. He made it his goal to make Tim smile as much as he could. He fed him, watched movies with him, read to him. Suddenly Tim Drake was like the center of his universe. Sometimes Dick, Bruce or Alfred would take over for him for a couple of hours, but usually it was just the two of them.
One time Dick started talking about his weekend with his friends, things that they did, Tim got upset, so Jason shut him down. Then Damian started making comments about Tim's slow recovery, even though there was progress: Tim was able to sit now, talk using monosyllabic words, even feed himself slowly on his own. Though he still was tired all the time, still had headaches. Dick with his fun stories about normal life without health issues and Damian with his comments didn't help with Tim recovery. Besides, Bruce was frustrated because of another crisis.
That's why Jason decided to pack their things and move to a safe house. Tim looked relieved, which only cemented Jason's decision.
During the first week on their own they were faced with a problem: in the manor Alfred bathed Tim, because he was still physically too weak to do it on his own. So Jason had to do it. No problem, even though sounds a little awkward.
That was when things changed. Jason was soaping his body, when he thought for the first time, how soft and smooth Tim's skin is. When he was massaging Tim's scalp, Tim moaned, his pink lips slightly parted. After they were done, Jason helped Tim get in the bed, went to shower to get himself clean and finally relaxed, letting hot water wash over him, when he touched himself to the memory of Tim's body.
It was like they build a heaven just for the two of them. Jason helped Tim to get to the bathroom, went to a store to buy groceries, called out "I'm home", when he was back, then started to cook. Tim was slowly relearning how to do things on his own. They spend time doing something together. They went to sleep separately. It would have been perfect, if only Jason didn't fall in love with Tim and this civilian life they were living.
Things changed again, when Jason helped Tim into bed after bath and was ready to go jerk off in the shower, when Tim stopped him and asked if he could help him. Jason, confused, didn't get it. Tim touched his cock through his sweatpants, and Jason groaned. Then he finally kissed him.
this is so cuutee!!! 🥺🥺🥺 the way that jason takes over taking care of tim when he's not able. the way jason learns how to best care for tim, gets attuned to his feelings, realizes that the best way to help him is get him out of the manor.
then jason growing attracted to tim and the private little life they now have together!!!!!hiding his attraction to tim but then tim catching on and reciprocating!!!!!🥰🥰🥰🥰
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Welcome to Hawkins
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Tw; swearing, mention of child abuse, mention of injuries.
To not steal my work, thank you!
Billy Hargrove/Male reader (he/him)
Summary; you find Billy on the side of the road, bloody and angry. The worse part? You are not alone in the dark.
~~~
Hawkins was a weird place. Even before the Byers boy went missing, the town faced strange things. Electrical anomalies, weird sightings in the forest and sometimes animals would meet a gruesome end. By now you were used to it.
Until the Hargrove came to town.
Hawkins was a small place where everybody knew everyone. There was no secret, not even inside your home. Even if you went in the middle of the wood, by morning the whole town would be aware of what you did. So it was no surprise they were met with mistrust.
Because it only took one look for everyone to agree; there was something wrong with them all. Especially with the father, you thought. With the way, he spoke to his son and how Billy would sometime flinch when his father moved his hands. It was obvious that something was going on.
And then they all met Billy Hargrove at school. Violent, racist, and always ready to fight. He tried so hard to be the king of the school, it was almost pathetic. But he was good to party with, you heard.
For your part, you disliked him. Billy and you would always fight; in the corridors, after school or even during sports class. Sometimes he would win, but most of the time? You would show no mercy and beat the shit out of him.
You weren't violent, some would even call you peaceful. But peaceful doesn't mean harmless and you refused to let Billy Hargrove do as he pleased.
You also pitied him.
No one was blind to the bruised he would try to play off as accidents or results of fights that never happened. Or how he would flinch, even so slightly when someone accidentally slammed a door or dropped something heavy. Or the fear his eyes would hold for a second when someone would throw a ball of paper and it would pass close to his head.
It broke your heart.
And there was nothing you could do.
That night as you drove, the forest on each side of the road, you kept thinking about the Hargrove boy. You wondered what kind of person he really was underneath all those masks he wore to protect himself.
Halfway through the forest, something caught your attention. At first, you thought it was a dead animal, maybe a deer. But then, it moved.
- “Shit!” you cursed, hitting the brake. “Hargrove? What the fuck are you doing here?” you asked, getting out of your car.
Because sitting on the side of the road was the one and only Billy Hargrove. Hair messy and bloody lips, Billy seemed to come out of a fight as the loser. But something was terribly wrong; his eyes were red and puffy and wet as if he has cried.
- “Fuck off man.” Billy snapped, looking away.
- “Seriously?” you sighed “C’mon city boy, I'm driving you home.” you added, eyes turning to the forest.
- “I said, fuck off! Or are you deaf?” replied Hargrove, making you grunt.
- “Oh, shut up. You think I'm leaving you here to be eaten by a bear?”
- “There aren't any bears in Hawkins.” objected Billy, scuffing.
- “Ah yes! I forgot it was my imaginary friend Steve who killed those animals!” you replied sarcastically. “Now you either get in the car by yourself like the good boy you are, or I'll get you in.”
- “Fuck. You.” slowly said Billy, smiling. “Anyway, why do you care so much? We are not friends or anything.”
- “Because there is no way I am leaving you here in the middle of the night!” you snapped, approaching him.
- “Wait, wait, wait! Don't tell me you are scared?” mocked Billy. “Seriously? Scared of the dark, Y/n?”
- “No, not the dark, but of what's hiding in it,” you said, seriously, stopping in front of Billy.
Billy was about to reply something when you heard the eeriest scream coming from the forest. You both froze, staring into the darkness. There was no sound, not even a cricket, or wind. It felt just wrong. Like a second before the disaster. And you felt watched like a prey being stalked.
- “Hargrove, get in the car.” you said, voice shaking as you saw a large shadow move between the tree. “NOW!”
You grabbed him by the collar and turned on your heels. Without another word, you two ran as another scream came from the forest, closer this time.
You barely closed the door before turning the engine on and driving away as fast as you could.
- “What the fuck was that?” asked Billy, looking behind. “That wasn't a bear!”
- “I don't know! I don't fucking know, man!” you replied, still freaking out. “It was too skinny to be a bear. Maybe a sick deer.”
- “Bitch, are you serious? Deer don't stand on their back legs!”
You didn't have the time to reply to anything, spotting the shadow on your left. In the dark, you could not really distinguish anything, but you could swear it was now running on four.
- “I don't want to sound dramatic, but I think it's following us.” you said.
- “How...”
Billy never finished his sentence. Instead, you both screamed when a tall shadow jumped in front of the car as you hit the brakes.
Standing on its back legs, the creature had smooth skin, almost like an eel” you thought. But darker. Like charcoal or shadows. And its head was like a flower.
You almost screamed again, feeling Billy gripping your arms and digging his nails into your skin.
- “What the fuck. Man, what the fuck is that?” he asked, his voice a mumbling mess.
- “Don't ask me! I don't know!” you whined, hands shaking on the wheel. “Man, I can't do a U-turn and there is no way I can drive in reverse in the dark.”
- “Then just run over it! Do something!”
And you did just that.
Pushing your car as fast as it could toward the creature. Maybe it knew what you were trying to do, or maybe it got scared, but seconds before the impact, the creature jumped out of your way. You sighed in relief but didn't slow down.
You heard Billy’s breath slow down before you felt his forehead on your shoulder. If he was crying, you saw nothing, because God be your witness, you were too. Not letting go of your arm, Billy actually tightened his grip.
- “Tell me it's gone. Please tell me it's gone.” he begged with a small voice.
- “Yeah, I don't see it anymore,” you replied.
- “I don't think I can go party anymore.”,” said Billy.
- “Yeah. Welcome to Hawkins.” you scoffed. “So, mind guiding me to your place?”
- “I'll rather not” he whispered.
- “Mind if I take you to mine then? I'll give you some of my shit and will take care of those bruised. I know where my parents hid their alcohol. God, I need a drink!”
- “As long as you share that drink, that sounds good to me. But I'm taking the bed!”
- “Fine princess!”
Billy said nothing and you relaxed. Heart still racing in your chest, you wondered of it was that thing who was responsible for the latest slaughter in the nearby farms. Or killed those missing outsiders. A part of you also knew you needed to call the sheriff, but the other knew it was useless. No one would believe you and you didn't want to put Billy in more danger.
So to your home, it was.
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whiteteadreams · 1 year
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Watching Over You
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Paring: Yandere!Gaurdian Angel!Lee Taeyong x Human!Female Reader
Preview: Turning your head to question his silence, his expression could only be described as fucking appalled. “What’s the matter?” His expression was even more flabbergasted if that could be possible. 
“What’s the matter? Darling, only a fucking fool would break up with you.” You felt hot despite the cold air, even your ears were warm. The heat didn’t stop even when his freezing hands were now cupping your cheeks. He smashed his lips into yours, ignoring the pain shooting through his nose when it pressed into your cheek a bit too roughly.
Word Count: 13.3k 
Genre: Yandere, darker theme, Non-Idol AU, kinda paranormal AU, angst, fluff, smut
Warnings: Yandere/obsessive behavior, manipulation, taeyong using her trauma against her, sexual non-con watching (extremely easy to miss!!), violence, slight religious themes, summoning the devil, overall abusive and toxic relationship, she has a cat named ferguson 
Smut Warnings: body worship (f receiving), oral sex (f receiving), boob worship, praise, pet names (baby, etc), rimming (f receiving), slight ass eating (f receiving), unprotected sex (let's not), one night stand, kitchen sex, living room sex, he slaps her once, riding, slight humiliation, finger sucking, he calls her his bitch, slut, messy, etc. fingering her ass 
a/n- this is my first yandere/dark fic so I hope you guys like it! and this is purely fiction, I don't see taeyong as someone who would truly act like this. AND BIG THANK YOU TO MY TUMBLR BESTIE @neowinestainedress FOR HELPING ME COME UP WITH THE ENDING!!!!!!!! I'm also so sorry abt this taking forever, I got sick and then schoolwork piled up and it was all just a mess. I hope this was worth the wait and if it isn't, I'm so sorry. again, thank you rebs for supporting me thru this lol.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Moving on was harder than you thought it would be. When you were younger and as single as possible, you always thought that when a serious relationship ended, it wouldn’t be too hard, for you at least. Younger you was very wrong, because here you were, a whopping seven months after your relationship had ending, still sulking.
“Get your ass out of your apartment right now.” The screaming voice caused you to pull your phone away from your ear as you winced. “Come on Chae, it’s comfortable here. Nice and cold, with Ferguson.” When hearing his name, the chubby cat waddled over to your sitting figure on the floor and flopped down.  “See, Fergie-Boy wouldn’t ever leave me, he came over to me when he heard him name.” You pulled away from the phone to coo at the cat. “You’re my baby aren’t you, my little boy, my son.”
The baby talk was interrupted when you heard Chaeyoung’s cackling. “Okay, you really need to get out of the house that isn’t because of uni or work.”  You heard the sign that Chaeyoung let out through the phone, and it made you wonder if she was right. Should you get out, in that way? Meet someone? Move on?
You wouldn’t have realized that you said that last part out loud if Chaeyoung didn’t yell out, “Yes Y/n, move on, get over him. You deserve better, don’t give him any more of your tears, he isn’t worthy.” You knew she was right, but of course, you were still hesitant. “Okay Chae, let’s go out.” Finally giving in, you gave Ferguson another pat and then got up from your spot.
“That’s great Y/n! Now let me in.” You had already hung up the phone, Chaeyoung’s voice wasn’t coming from the phone this time, but behind the door. “I know you can hear me, open up!” Deciding that it wasn’t worth it to fight her on this, you huffed and silently walked to the door to let in Chae, with Ferguson right on your heels.
Opening the door, you saw the newly blonde smile wide at you and throw her hands in the air. “We’re gonna go out! It’s been so long!” Slightly rolling your eyes in a loving way, you allowed her to drag you to your bedroom to start the process of getting ready. “Okay, the goal is to get your sexy ass laid, so that’s what’s going to happen!”  That wasn’t your goal, but you noticed that Chae was already having fun and you weren’t going to be the one to ruin it.  
“Okay babe, I already have the dress and shoes that you’re going to wear tonight.” You just noticed the tote bag that was swung around Chae’s shoulder and with the grin on her face, you couldn’t tell her no.
Letting Chaeyoung push you into your own room, you watched her look through your makeup and jewelry while she told you to put on the dress. You did what you were told and with minimal tugging at the fabric, you let the short dress hug your curves. Checking yourself out in the mirror, you admittedly looked good, well your hair needed to be brushed and your eye bags covered, but other than that, it wasn’t obvious that you hadn’t left your house for fun in months.
“Alright, sit-down hot stuff, let me fix you up.” Talking about random things and listening to music, you watched the time pass on your digital alarm clock as you felt Chae tickle your face with various brushes, adding on pigment to different parts of your skin. Cheeks, eyelids, and finally lips, you and Chae were finished, and it was now late enough to head out. You slipped on your heels and headed to your front door.
“Wait-wait-wait!” Chae jogged to you after you passed your bedroom door. Spinning on your heels, trying not to fall, you were just ready to go and get the night over with. “I brought you some of my crystals, they’ll help you manifest love.” She wiggled her eyebrows along with her hips and took out a small drawstring bag from her tote bag.
“Alright, we got some green aventurine, malachite, sunstone, carnelian, emerald, clear quartz, smoky quartz, and of course, rose quartz. So, you’re gonna keep these on you for the night and hopefully some lucky guy will appear.” She tied the bag shut and pushed it your way.
“You and your witchy stuff, I swear. Where am I even supposed to put those?” Your freshly shaped eyebrow rose, patting along your pocketless dress.
“Put it between your tits, that’s where I keep mine.” Chaeyoung pulled at the hem of her dress, flashing her rock hilled cleavage at you. Both of you laughed, but Chae wasn’t laughing at the rocks, she was serious about those. Chae stepped closer to you, inspecting your chest.
“Alright, pull them apart sister, gotta get you some love.” Instead of letting her situate her crystals, you just took them and put them between your breasts yourself.
Sharing a laugh with Chaeyoung as the two of you walked to elevator, you were thankful that she was there to take your mind off of your ex. Chae was always able to keep the conversation moving, never running out of topics to talk about. She had just switched the subject to one of her witchy things, this was something that you knew nothing about so while she was ranting on how she figured out to summon the devil, you ordered an Uber for the two of you. You didn’t want to drive downtown, and Chae was probably going to drink so she shouldn’t drive at all.
Chaeyoung was looking at you when you looked up from your phone. “Can you repeat that last part? I was ordering our Uber.” She understood and repeated on how to summon the devil and why you would ever need to.
“Normally people only speak to him when someone who is holy is bothering them, like an angel or such. Other reasons include trading or selling your soul, getting rid of people, and some people just want to have sex with a demon, I don’t know how I feel about that one though.” You didn’t care much about what she was saying but you did care about how happy she was when she was interested in something, in this case, she was interested in knowing how to summon Satan himself.
Giggling at her rant, you just listened to her talk until the Uber arrived and then you listened to her talk some more in the car and until you pulled up to the club.
“Alright ladies, your total is $7.12.” You paid the man and gathered your purse and jacket. “Have fun, be careful, and watch who you summon!” He called out as you and Chae left the car, you threw your head back and laughed, realizing that he too had been listening to Chaeyoung’s demon summoning rant. Her shy side shone through for a quick second when she blushed and ducked her head down, hiding the color on her warm cheeks.
You smiled at her, watching the color leave her cheeks when the embarrassment wore off. “Well at he knows how to get some extra help if its ever needed.” You teased her, poking her arm, reminding her that he had heard the entire conversation. “Fuck off.” She giggled and pushed you a bit. “Well, at least he was nice.”
He had dropped you off in front of the restaurant next to the club so you a minute walk to get to the entrance, it was still early enough where the line only consisted of a couple people. The back of the line was where the two of you stood for a bit, until someone walked out of the club, and another could walk in. Chae picked up where she left off on her summoning talk, gaining some stares from other people in the line, as well as people just passing by. Once Chaeyoung found something that she was passionate about, she made sure that everyone knew. And if she caught someone side eyeing her for a bit too long, she would just respond with, “You’re gonna need it when I curse your ass.”
While Chaeyoung was telling someone off, the bouncer motioned for you to step forward and show your IDs. “C’mon Chae, time to go in.” Immediately dropping the argument, she was about to get in, she whipped out her ID, showed the bouncer, and walked into the club, with you reluctantly trailing behind her, despair evident on your face.
Taking your hand and dragging you to the bar, Chaeyoung was scoping out the people in the club, the ones dancing, drinking, and the wallflowers. She was making mental notes on who she was going to take home tonight. The watching didn’t stop when you got your drinks, she just sipped on her lemon drop martini while eye fucking one guy in particular. He was returning her stares and soon enough he was sauntering over to the bar where the two of you were.
They did what hot people do and started a conversation, one that showed they were interested in each other but still vague enough to not give anything away. It’s been a while since you had one of those conversations. Sitting on the couch and eating popcorn with Ferguson wasn’t getting you anywhere in life and while you understood where Chaeyoung was coming from, there was no where you’d rather be than at home, sitting on the couch and eating popcorn with Ferguson.
“And for you?” There was a slight pause before the voice started again. “Miss?” Once you’re out of focused mind, understood that it was you, the voice was directed at, you whipped your head around.
While you had been taking in your surroundings and watching Chaeyoung interact with the man, the bartender had been trying to get your attention. “Ah yes, and I suppose I should order something. I’ll just have a mojito, with lime, please and thank you.” You smiled at him, noticing just how attractive he was, thick black hair, deep eyes, a sharp jaw, and a thick bottom lip. Maybe just sitting at the bar all night while Chaeyoung mingled wouldn’t be too bad.
When your drink was placed in front of you, Chaeyoung turned your seat around. “I’m gonna go dance with him, but feel free to interrupt me at any point if you need anything.” She said it in such a serious tone and pointed in the area that you assumed they were going to be. Looking back at the bartender who now had his broad back towards you, you nodded at Chae and told her to have fun.
As soon as she walked away, you could tell tonight was going to be a long night. “Is there anything wrong with the drink?” The bartender returned to what you wanted to be his designated spot, right in front of you. You shook your head, “No, it’s quite good, and I’m not much of a drinker.” You smiled at him, an odd sense of familiarity washing over you. Positive that you had never met this man before, you still couldn’t help but be confused by the feeling he brought you.
“Ah, I was worried you didn’t like it since I haven’t seen you drink much.” He’s been watching you, that’s a good sign. “No, no, it’s really good, I’ve just been people watching.” He smiled at you and that caused you to smile back.
The conversation you two had could easily fall into the category in which you put Chaeyoung’s conversation in, the kind hot people have. You made sure he knew you were interested, but you gave him no major details about your work or personal life. The two of you didn’t even exchange names but you were confident in receiving the answer you wanted with you next question.
“Would you, maybe, want to get out of here.” You didn’t realize you were leaning over the bar until he did the same, and your noses brushed. “I would absolutely love to, but I’m unfortunately working. How about we exchange numbers and I give you a call when my shift is over? It shouldn’t be too long.” You didn’t want to pull away from his face, loving the feel of his breath mixing with yours, you looked at him and exchanged smiles. But you wanted to hurry up and get out of the club, not without getting his number though. Reaching into your purse, you grabbed your phone, eager to get any piece of him, even if it was just a handful of digits.
Watching his diligent fingers type in his phone number into the new contact he made himself, you were already excited to receive the call from him. And, quite frankly, you’d settle for a text from him that just said, “r u up”, although you could assume he wasn’t that type of guy. Surely, he’d request a booty call in your voicemail inbox. You noticed him pulling his phone out from somewhere under the bar and placing it in front of you, unlocked.
Noticing that you were putting in your number very carefully and reading over the number several times before giving him his phone back, you scolded yourself for being so desperate. You then heard Chaeyoung’s voice, somewhere far in your head, “you deserve to be thirsty girl, go get his dick. This is what we’ve been manifesting, don’t let it go to waste!” Smiling at the faint illusion, you looked back at the bartender, waiting for him to say something next.
“I hope you assumed that I wasn’t going to charge you for the drink, so is there anything else you want?” His eyes told you that no matter what, he wasn’t going to let you pay, and you felt the butterflies in your stomach flutter around. “The only thing I want right now, is you.” Even with the glaring LEDs in the club, you could tell you made him blush. He bit his lip and looked down, all while slightly shaking his head. You mentally patted yourself on the back, proud of his flustered reaction. All of a sudden, you were proud of yourself for paying attention to all of Chaeyoung’s flirting advice and sitting through all of the romance movies with her.
“I’ll be right back; I’m going to go tell my boss that I’m feeling sick. You find your friend and tell her that you’ll be leaving so she doesn’t worry. I’ll meet you at the door.” Smiling at the fact that you wouldn’t even have to wait for him to get off shift, you nodded at him and watched him back away and tell the other bartender that he wasn’t feeling well. You turned around and searched for Chae, who stayed true to her word and was where she said she would be.
“Hey Chae, I’m going to head out, I’ve had enough for the night.” You yelled over the loud music, trying to let your friend know that you weren’t just disappearing. “Okay, let me get my purse and then we can go!” Once you heard the words that came out of Chaeyoung’s mouth you started shaking your head. “No, I’ll be okay, I’m going with the hot bartender, you keep having fun!” You nodded your head back towards the bar and then towards the man right next to Chae, who was patiently letting you guys finish your conversation. Although he looked sick, Chaeyoung seemed to be into him. Her face made everything even better, the surprise was evident but so was impressed look. Without giving a verbal answer you just smiled at her and nodded, happy to see her having a good time and happy that you wouldn’t spend the night alone.  
You looked up from Chae and swallowed, if the music wasn’t blasting, surely, you’d be able to hear it. Your throat contracting out of nervousness, the club had attracted a crowd since you arrived, and it caused the path to the door to disappear. Yelling your final goodbyes at Chae and glaring at the man she was dancing with in warning, you mapped out your escape plan.
As soon as the couple closest to you slid to the side a bit, you squeezed through. You felt the sweat of the other dancing bodies land on your skin, you shivered in disgust, wishing you were just at the door, with him. “Wanna dance, baby?”
Looking over to your left you saw a man, one who was not attractive to say the least, and the way he was sitting wasn’t tasteful at all, a way that some men could pull off but not all, manspreading. Your face couldn’t hide your distaste and the man didn’t seem too fond of that. “I’m okay, thank you though.” Continuing your journey to the door, you felt his hand latch onto your arm, refusing to let you go.
“But I want to dance, so you’re going to let me.” His grip tightened and you winced. “Ow, let go, you’re hurting me.” He just sneered and pulled you to his chest, starting to thrust against your ass.
The man’s breath was right against your neck, until it wasn’t. “The fuck is wrong with you, man? Touching my girlfriend even after she told you to stop.” You weren’t someone’s girlfriend, that was the reason why Chaeyoung made you come out tonight in the first place.
With the quick decision to trust the mystery man over the man who touched you, you moved over to where you heard the voice, shielding yourself from the other man.  
The mystery man didn’t stay a mystery for long, you noticed that he was the bartender. You suddenly felt safer than you were just being behind him, now knowing who he was. He didn’t seem interested in starting a physical fight like the other man was. He just threw a couple names at him and started walking out of the club. You felt his hand hover above the small of you back, not wanting to touch you without your permission after what had just happened.
While you were afraid of pushing people out of the way, he wasn’t. With him helping you out of the club, he made sure not a single person touched you, you knew how hard it was the moment you did try so you were curious about how easy it was for him. He was behind you, so you saw people move before you were even close to them. One guy in particular’s eyes widened and nodded his head at the bartender.
Since he was able to get people to move immediately, exiting the club was much easier than from before. You could hear the other man’s yells over the booming music but the only thing you were focused on was getting outside, away from all the people, and away from all the body heat.
“We’re close, calm your breathing, it’s really heavy.” You hadn’t realized that you were all but panting, stressed and uncomfortable, feeling trapped, except the man behind you. You felt safe with him, he was oddly protective over you, but it was nice, something you had never experienced.
You gasped in the fresh air once the cool evening air ingulfed your warm body. Laughing at the absurdity of it all, you smiled over at the bartender who now was out with you, and you could see him clearly now. The entire situation wasn’t that absurd, but with how far outside your comfort zone you were right now, it was insane for you. The bartender just watched you laugh to yourself with a smile on his face. “Ah, if you don’t mind me asking, what’s so funny?”
Starting to walk in the direction of your apartment, you started to explain, without giving too much, still trying to achieve the hot people talk. “I just don’t do this too much, let alone go home with someone.” It was his turn to laugh now and that made you look at him, a bit funny too. “That’s pretty hard to believe, you have to be the most beautiful woman I have ever seen in my life.”
Raising your eyebrows at him in surprise, you giggled at him mimicking your facial expression. “What’s surprising about my amazing taste in women?” You bumped him with your side, you voice now significantly quieter than it had been. “I’ve just, never been told that by anyone in my life. The only people who called me pretty, were my parents.” He tsked at your confession like it was the craziest thing he’s ever heard.
“Did you not have an ex-partner or anything?” Not sure what he was implying, you started off with nodding. “Yeah, I’ve had a boyfriend. We were together for a really long time, since high school actually. He broke up with me seven months ago, this the first time out of the house for something ‘fun’ to be honest.”
Turning your head to question his silence, his expression could only be described as fucking appalled. “What’s the matter?” His expression was even more flabbergasted if that could be possible. 
“What’s the matter? Darling, only a fucking fool would break up with you.” You felt hot despite the cold air, even your ears were warm. The heat didn’t stop even when his freezing hands were now cupping your cheeks. He smashed his lips into yours, ignoring the pain shooting through his nose when it pressed into your cheek a bit too roughly.
“He made it seem like it was my fault.” So overwhelmed by the unexpected emotion from the kiss, you sniffled. “It wasn’t.” Before you could ask how he knew, he cut you off. “I just know.” Looking at him through teary eyes, you whined without really saying anything. “He already took too much of your time, let’s stop thinking about him and I’ll do my best to help you forget him.”
“I still don’t even know your name.” Watching his fingers caress your knuckles, you realized that you were still calling him ‘the bartender’. “Taeyong. My name is Taeyong.” Pretty name for a pretty man. You gave him your name in return and loved the way to said it, he whispered it, almost like if your name was said too loud, it would break. That’s the same way he held you too, like you were a piece of fragile glass. But more importantly, he held you like you were his, and you were more than willing to be just that.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Taeyong straddled you, his thighs trapping you underneath him, he stared down at your bare body. Bare for him, while he was clothed except for the unbuttoned shirt, showing you, his tattoos. “You don’t understand how long I’ve waited to have you.”
His confession caused your brows to furrow, confused by what he meant. Before you could even truly think to ask, you felt his nose drag between your breasts, breathing you in, and descending down your body. He mentioned worshipping each and every piece of you, and he fulfilled that promise. Taking his time with moving alone your body, he kissed, licked, and nipped every few seconds, never letting a single inch of skin go bare. You were positive that when you looked into the mirror in the morning, you would see several bruises and marks along your once bare skin.
“You smell and t-taste so fucking good.” He said it like it was too good to be true, like he had been longing for you. “Y-you are just so fucking good.” Taeyong looked up from where he was between your legs, finally at his destination. The thing he’s been obsessing over ever since he met you.
He didn’t run his tongue through your slit like you first expected, you felt something harder, the bridge of his nose. Taeyong loved the smell of you as it was, but the seedy scent of your arousal was something that made his mouth water, and the fact that it was caused by him, made everything better. He wanted to be the only person to ever get you like this and to ever experience you like this. You were his.
Opening his mouth and breathing your scent in, he groaned and jutted his hips against your bed sheets, trying to get some relief for the aching throb he was starting to feel surge through his cock. You saw him roll his hips into your bed and grew jealous of the friction that he was receiving and that you weren’t. Trying to take matters into your own hands, or hips, you tried bucking your pelvis up, closer to his mouth.
All he did was laugh and hold you down. “Be patient, I’ve been wanting to taste you ever since I met you.” You felt the tip of his nose at your hole, once again, he inhaled your smell, seemingly never satisfied with one breath. The foreign feeling was felt out of nowhere, you were trying to distract yourself from bucking your hips into his face again. He finally licked along your slit, teasing you from your cunt to your clit, until his tongue made its way back down to your pussy. He passed your hole and ventured even further down, to your unused rim.
Gasping and arching your back, not used to the feeling, Taeyong laughed. “I’m sorry, I just didn’t want to leave any part of you untouched.” You laughed with him, enjoying the feeling of being cared for in your chest, as well as the feeling in your lower stomach.
Taeyong’s mouth returned to the place you wanted it the most. “Tae-”, you moaned when he sucked your clit particularly rough. The way he played with you had you unable to sit still, your legs almost involuntarily kicked up at bit, now bent at the knee. With the way your legs were positioned now, and your feet were right by his head, exposing your entire cunt to him.
“You’re so fucking pretty.” With that, his head disappeared between your legs, face pressing hard into your pussy, almost like no matter what, he couldn’t get enough of you.
His tongue flicked through your slit, gathering wetness and playing with it. He played with you, even as you were begging him to just fucking you already, he still enjoyed the taste of you.
It wasn’t until you let out a harsh scream when his teeth grazed your clit, he finally came back up to properly fuck you. With one last kiss to your clit, he kissed his way back up your body. You were panting when you were at last, face to face.
“I haven’t even done anything yet and you’re already a mess.” Disbelief was the only thing that was shown on your face. “You haven’t done anything? That’s the most pleasure I’ve experience in more than half a year that wasn’t caused by myself!” As soon as the words left your mouth, embarrassment washed over you, worried that you had shared too much.
“Well, that’s just a shame, a woman like you should have someone bending over backwards to make you feel good. I’m still pissed off from the fact that your douchebag ex left you like that.” You grimaced at the memory of him, not wanting to talk about him, especially now.
“It doesn’t matter now though, because I’m here now.” The tip of his dick prodded at your hole, one, twice, and then Taeyong thrusted inside you. Taeyong groaned above you while you gasped for air, not used to the feeling of being full anymore, but Taeyong filled you perfectly, like he was made for you.
The feeling of his cock dragging against your walls was almost overwhelming. You could feel him in your throat, like you couldn’t breathe in air. You could only breathe him in, you felt like he was everywhere. Feeling caged in, you felt safe. Safe in his arms. You had only known him for less than a few hours, yet you felt as if he knew you, he understood you.
When you looked up at him, he was already watching you. Analyzing your expressions, making sure you were enjoying yourself. You worried however, that he was so focused on you, that he wasn’t having fun either.
Wrapping your arms around his neck, you pulled him closer, craving to feel his lips on yours again. You heard Taeyong whine as soon as his lips met yours, and you couldn’t help but make the same sound. “Tae-, I’m close.” Your words were broken up by a moan, now unable to think properly about anything that wasn’t him and the way he was making you feel.
Taeyong grabbed a hold of your right leg and threw it over his shoulder, spreading you open even more and allowing him more access to your pussy. You felt his hips meet yours with every thrust now. His thrusts were getting quicker and uneven, trying to chase his own high while bringing you to yours.
The moment he brought his thumb to your clit, you lost it. You felt your entire body tense up with sweet heat spreading throughout you. With your pussy tightening, Taeyong couldn’t hold back anymore either. He was about to pull out to cum, but as soon as you noticed the full feeling disappearing, you wrapped your legs around his hips to keep his hips pressed against yours. “Cum in me, please Taeyong.”
You could hear the squelch of your pussy now with how fast his hips were hitting yours. “Fuck, I’m gonna, I’m gonna cum.” With a stutter of his hips, you felt his release coat your walls.
Taeyong gently laid on top of you, not pulling out of you just yet. “Oh my god.” You panted out a laugh, in disbelief of how much pleasure you just felt since it had been so long. He smiled down at you and kissed your turned up lips.
He made sure you were cleaned up and satisfied before he held you until you both fell asleep. You were calm and happy for once. But as soon as you woke up, you were no longer calm.
It was several minutes before 6 AM when your eyes opened. At first your instinct was to freak out since you didn’t recognize where you were and the bed you were sleeping in, wasn’t empty. You became aware of the other body on the bed when he rolled over, farther from you. The memories from the night came crashing down on you all at once, affecting every single part of your body. Your heart, head, and the area between your legs. Your breathing sped up, but you knew you needed to leave, it was just a one-night stand, and by the look of him, you weren’t the only girl he’s been with. He was just too perfect.
The sight of your discarded clothes on the floor made you look beneath the blankets, because you weren’t naked. The ratty worn-out army green t-shirt was baggy on you and the boxers you had on were definitely not yours. The thought of him dressing you in his own clothes caused your heart to flutter, but still, that didn’t stop you from scooping up your club clothes in your arms and booking it to the front door. You figured that if you just kept on the old clothes, it would look less like a walk of shame than wearing your skimpy dress, just in case you had a long way to go. Thinking about whether or not this was stealing, you just decided to override your morals and just hope you saw him again someday.
As quietly as you could, you opened the door but gasped when you looked outside into the hallway. His hallway was an exact copy of yours. You looked at the number on the door, wondering if you had gone to your apartment but you saw an E32, which did not match your H19. Clearing the idea of this being your home out of your head, you closed the door and looked at your location using the 3% left of your phone battery.
You were in your own apartment complex.
“Fuck.” Not being able to decide whether you were relived or not, you just ran up the stairs to your floor after getting impatient with the elevator. You were glad that you were already in your own area and didn’t have to worry about finding a way back, but also you were worried about running into him sooner than you expected.
Your lovely H19 appeared into sight and with the panicked panting, you were finally able to have a peaceful exhale. Unlocking your door and slipping in, you were immediately met with Ferguson giving you an earful on being gone. He wasn’t used to you being gone for this long but when you bent down to pet him, he sniffed you and no longer wanted anything to do with you. It hurt to be honest, he was your only friend besides Chaeyoung, most importantly though, he was your sweet precious baby angel.
“Fine Fergie-Boy, you be like that, I’ll go wash away my sins, so you love me again.” And that’s what you did, you treated yourself to an everything shower since you hadn’t partaken in any self-care activity in such a long time. Shaving, plucking, washing, and exfoliating was some of the things you did for the next couple of hours. After drying off, you lathered your body in lotion, sighing at the relief of the cool temperature and smooth texture. Ferguson peeked his head through the crack since the door wasn’t closed. He sniffed the air, presumably smelling you without getting too close. Seemingly happy with the data he gathered, he slipped in the bathroom, but not without opening the door much more than he needed to.
You replaced Taeyong’s clothes with your own and Ferguson was more than happy to rub against the leg of your sweatpants. “Oh, my baby boy, I’m back to smelling like roses, just like what you’re used to.” You picked up the bottle of body mist and allowed Ferguson to smell it. Scent was always important to him, he only liked yours and Chaeyoung’s, no one else’s. He was stingy.
“How about we bake something? I’m thinking some kind of turnover.” Ferguson purred in response, helping you make up your mind.
After pulling the freshly baked pastries out of the oven, you suddenly remembered that you hadn’t gotten your mail for the past couple of days. You pass the mailboxes every time you go downstairs, but you only force yourself to do every couple of days.
Double checking that the oven was turned off and that the turnovers were out of Ferguson’s reach, you grabbed your apartment keys and the key that opened your mailbox.
“I’ll be right back Fergie-Boy.” You yelled over your shoulder at the now uninterested cat. Making sure your apartment was locked, you headed down the hallway towards the elevator. You had forgotten about Taeyong until you saw the E floor button on the panel in the elevator, but you shook him from your mind and just pressed the Lobby button.
Smiling at the man behind the counter, you walked next to said counter where the resident’s mailboxes were. You held the key in your hand and unlocked the little locker type door. Unsurprised was what you were when you looked through the box’s contents, bills, coupons, junk mail, the usual, of course.
“Hey stranger” a familiar voice was heard from your side and you tensed up, not mentally prepared to speak to him again. Taeyong just gave you a shy smile and unlocked his mailbox that was two rows below yours.
“Hey Taeyong, how are you?” He giggled a bit but answered your question. “Well, I’m doing pretty good, had a good night. I just can’t seem to find a shirt and pair of boxers.” He gave you a knowing side eye and raised one of his eyebrows expectantly.
You felt hot, scared that anyone near you would know what was going on, but to your relief when you looked around your surroundings, it was just you and Taeyong, even the complex’s receptionist wasn’t anywhere to be seen.
Laughing off your worry, you looked at Taeyong. “I think I might know where you put them.” His laugh was hearty, like it came from his chest, like he meant it. “Ah, really? You wouldn’t mind showing me where they are, would you?”
The crumpling sound of the mail that was now tightly gripped in your hand was the only thing keeping you down to Earth. But that wasn’t enough for you to tell him no.
“Fuck, Taeyong” your back hit your now closed door. His lips were attached to your neck, sucking the flesh into his mouth, leaving scattered marks. Both of your hands were roaming around his chest, glad to experience this again but with a clear head.
Much to your dismay, Taeyong pulled away from you in confusion and looked down by your feet. The little cock blocker himself was staring up at you. Ferguson was headbutting Taeyong’s ankles, trying to get him off of you. “You have a cat.” Taeyong bent down to give Ferguson some affection but the cat just hissed at him, not having any of it.
“Ferguson, he’s my little Fergie-Boy.” You smiled at them both. Even though you were upset at Ferguson’s distaste for Taeyong, you weren’t surprised at all. “I should’ve guessed, he looks like a Ferguson.” You bent down to both of their levels and put your hand out for Ferguson to rub against, unlike with Taeyong, the chubby cat gladly accepted your love. Even though he was preoccupied with rubbing against your hand, Ferguson kept side eyeing Taeyong.
“I think he wants me to leave.” Taeyong frowned a bit at you, waiting for you to say something. “Yeah, I think that would be for the best. Maybe we can go somewhere together sometime?” You immediately offered, not wanting Taeyong to think you weren’t interested in him after all.  
“I would like that. There’s this little café near here. Would that be something you’d like?” Your smile took over your face and you nodded. “Alright, you have my number, text me whenever you’re free. I really hope you text me.” His lips ghosted over yours and his smile matched your own. “You have my number too, you can text me first, you know?” He pecked your lips after you said that.
“The only reason I’m not going to text you first is because I don’t want you to feel pressured.” It felt like your stomach was doing somersaults. “I’ll text you.” Biting your lip to try to conceal your ever-growing smile, Taeyong brought his thumb up to your face. He pulled your lip from your teeth. “Now if you keep doing that, I don’t think I’ll be able to leave, whether your cat likes it or not.”
His nose brushed against yours, but when you tried to reconnect your lips, he pulled away and stood up.
With his hand on the doorknob, he looked down at where you were on the floor and said, “Remember to text me.” Feeling like your voice was lost somewhere in your throat, you just nodded. Taeyong chuckled lowly and opened your door, stepping out with a wink.
When your door was closed and you could hear his footsteps get quieter, you looked down at Ferguson who was already giving you the stink eye.  
“Why don’t you like him? He’s so nice and not to mention hot.” You scratched him on top of his head, trying to somehow convince him to like Taeyong.
The rest of the day went by fairly quickly. You baked a few more things, unnecessary things, but none the less your apartment was smelling like a bakery. You also caught up on laundry and did other household chores, but every now and then Ferguson would demand treats or attention.
As soon as you called it a night and sat on the cough, your bowling ball sized cat jumped on your lap, refusing to let you get comfortable before he did. “Oh how I love it when you remind me that you’re higher up in the hierarchy than I am.” You looked down at Ferguson, lightly blowing on his head, just to get him to look up at you.
“How about we text Taeyong? I know you hate him, but mommy doesn’t so we’re gonna text him.” The cat grumbled when you reached for your phone and immediately going to his contact.
you- hey, i know we just saw each other but i was wondering if you wanted to go out tomorrow
taeyong- it’s alright, i was just thinking about you so i don’t mind at all, and sure, i’d like that
taeyong- i have to work tomorrow night but i’m free in the morning and afternoon
The both of you agreed at meeting at the café Taeyong mentioned earlier around 11 AM. Although Ferguson wasn’t happy with you at the moment, you couldn’t help but pick him up off your lap and into your arms to give him a little hug.
“This is amazing Ferguson! I’m finally going on a date!” You just couldn’t keep in your excitement; it had been so long since experiencing this feeling and now that you had it back you weren’t just going to let it go.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~“Hey Taeyong!” You approached his side, excited to sit down with just him in a quiet environment. The smile he gave you caused you to believe that if you died right then, you’d be happy. “I’m so glad you showed up.”
He already had a drink sitting in front of him, but it was still full and piping hot. “Why wouldn’t I?” You racked your brain for any reasons why he would think you wouldn’t show up.
“Well, Ferguson, he doesn’t seem to like me very much and since he’s the number one man in your life, I understand that you would put him first.” Busting out a laugh, you looked at his serious face turn to a much more playfully pleasant one. “Ah, don’t worry about that sour puss, he only likes me and my best friend.”
You were honestly in disbelief with how easy it was to fall into a comfortable conversation with him and much to your displeasure, the day grew later and Taeyong had to get to work.
“I’ve had a really good time with you. Do you think we could see each other again?” This was the first time you ever saw Taeyong act bashful but here he was. This man looking at you with round innocent eyes and a blush so red it was the color of a rose covering his cheeks.
Feeling some foreign sense of power from being the cause of his expression you smirked and said, “I already planned on texting you tonight.” He laughed and leaned in, kissing you on the cheek.
The next few months went along the lines of you two going on similar cute little dates and getting to know each other. He always seemed to understand you, even if you didn’t say much, which you appreciated.
You were helping Taeyong wash dishes after eating over at his place when your arm brushed his and caused you to pause. He immediately thought you were uncomfortable with the proximity and put some distance between the two of you.
“No, no, no. That isn’t it Taeyong. I was just thinking, or I guess wondering about something, about us. What are we?” He didn’t hesitate to eliminate the space he put between you, and he answered immediately.
Now closer to you, he said quietly, “Well, I hope we’re two people who like each other and are close to being a couple.” You smiled at him and responded with, “I’m good with hurrying up and being a couple, if you want.” Taeyong shook his head in approval and pressed you up against the sink, planting his lips to yours.
Turning around, remembering the task you two had, you whispered, “Taeyong, we have dishes to wash.” You felt his head lean on your shoulder. He placed kisses along the bare skin of your neck.
“You are the light of my life. I promise you; I will never cheat on you like that bastard did.”
You never told him that. The only person that knows that would be Chae, and she doesn’t talk to Taeyong unless you’re there. Not sure how to confront him, you just stood still, keeping your back to him. “Well, shit. I guess I gave myself away.” With Taeyong mumbling nonsense, just loud enough for you to hear, you were getting more and more confused. “Wha-what are you talking about Taeyong?”
Instead of responding immediately, he just laughed, a bit sinisterly and walked closer to you. By now you had turned around and was walking backwards in order to keep some distance between you and him. But the distance decreased when your back hit the edge of the kitchen island and Taeyong kept walking towards you. You could smell his breath as it fanned over your face, minty, you once loved it, but now, you weren’t too sure what to think.
“I’ve just been watching you. Watching over you for a very long time. You’re just too special to stay away from.” Taeyong brushed the back of his fingertips on your cheekbones, lightly like a feather, causing you to finch. He laughed at your fear, finally having you cornered.
"I’m your guardian angel, I appear whenever you're in pain, but I just can't stay away from you. I've been here this whole time and you just didn't know it sweetheart." Taeyong smirked at you, but you could tell he was telling the truth even though you were praying he wasn’t. "That's impossible, I met you three months ago!" he snickered and tossed his head back.
"Then how do I know everything about you? From when you were five and scrapped your knee on the playground, when you were eight and learning how to ride a bike, you ran into that tree, or when you were 17 and becoming curious about your body. You bought a toy for yourself-" "No, please no" you were backing away from him, now scared.
"Oh yes, that's what you said that night, until you pushed that little blue toy a bit too deep, you whimpered so sweetly, my love." Taeyong brushed his knuckles along your shoulder blades and smiled gently at you, quite the contrast of what he was saying. "No matter how much or how little pain you were in, I'd always be there. Even after everyone has left you, I always stayed, right by your side."
You were on auto pilot for the rest of the night, only when Taeyong would bring up old memories would you show any reaction. You’d cringe or tense whenever he’d say anything about him watching over you. When it was time to go to bed, you couldn’t sleep at all. The thought of you never being able to do anything without him seeing made you sick. Every time you’ve talked to somebody, went through something emotional, had sex, Taeyong saw it all.  Tears were streaming down your face, and you couldn’t do anything about it since the man you thought you knew turned out to be a complete stranger was right next to you.
Taeyong was sleeping, or at least you thought he was, so you took this as your chance to leave. As quietly as you could, you grabbed your purse from one of the chairs by your kitchen island and tiptoed to the door. You reached forward and wrapped your hand around the chilled doorknob and you turned it as you pulled it open. A hand appeared over your shoulder and pressed against the door, shutting it.
“What are you doing Y/n?” Your blood ran cold, terrified to turn around, you just stayed facing forward. “I need to go to work Taeyong.” His hand left the door and out of your sight, but you the suspense of where it was didn’t last long. Feeling both of his hands on your shoulders, rubbing your shoulder blades, you tensed up.
 “Why would you do that? There are so many dangerous things out there, I need to keep you safe.” Shaking your head rapidly as Taeyong used his hold on you to lead you away from the door. “Please Taeyong, you can’t keep me here.” Tears were threatening to fall from your eyes when Taeyong drug his nose along your neck. He chuckled against your ear, “Oh but I can. I was assigned to you and you to me, we were paired by the gods above. I broke the rules for you, my love. You see, you were never supposed to know I existed, I was supposed to live in the shadows.” “I didn’t ask you to do that Tae-” You tried to reason with the man who kept tightening his grip on you the more he spoke.
“No, you didn’t, but I couldn’t stand just observing you, that was enough for a while. However, I grew tired of being forced to watch you and not touch you.” His hands moved from your back to your stomach, where they moved up slowly, until they were hovering above your breasts. “Please, Taeyong, no, please stop.”
The tears finally fell and the man behind you just removed his hands and laughed. “I don’t want to force you to do anything, it would be much more enjoyable if you were begging me to do something. I don’t wish to be the man you hate; I desire to be the man you love.”
He went to bring you back into his embrace but when he got close you slapped his hands away. “I will never love you.” Taeyong just turned around to look out the window. You heard a hum come from the back of his mouth, “You may not love me now, but you will. If it takes me keeping you here and being the only person, you ever see again, then so be it.”
“Now, let’s get you to bed, you’re acting ridiculous, you must have not of gotten enough sleep.” Taeyong picked you up from where you were sitting on the floor ever since your knees buckled, his presence tore you apart. His embrace was warm, and it made you want to nuzzle into him but the thought of him not letting you leave made you want to puke.
“Why Taeyong?” You sniffled and your nose felt raw as he laid you on the bed. “You’re smarter than this Y/n, that’s an easy answer. It’s because I love you. It just helps that it’s also my job to keep you safe.” He laid next to you. Immediately being reminded of the times you and Taeyong would lay together before you found out who he really was, you were aching to move closer to him, but he kept the distance.
You thought about how he knew you better than anyone else did, but of course, he had an advantage.
Taeyong rarely let you leave the house without him, and you feel like you haven’t seen Chaeyoung in such a long time. You text her as often as you can, but it wasn’t the same.
Looking across the table at him, you questioned where you went wrong in this. You shouldn’t of ever gone to the club with Chaeyoung, or you should’ve at least not of sat down at the bar, in front of him. The thought of that night made you realize just how much you missed Chaeyoung.
“What’s the matter sweetheart?” Your sight refocused, getting out of the fuzzy daze you at put yourself in. “Oh, nothing, don’t worry about it.” Wanting to ignore him, you shut down his advances of conversation.
He just laughed and got up. “I think you forgot what I am to you. I know you’re in pain now, so tell me what’s the matter. I hate seeing you hurt.” His sweet words and sweet voice made you think twice about if Taeyong was actually a bad guy. He cared about you, he listened to you. Even though he made you live with him, he allowed Ferguson to come with him and he even endured the scratches and bites the cat would lay on him.
Exhaling, you told him. “I just miss Chae so much; she’s my only friend and I haven’t seen her in a while.” Taeyong frowned at you, “I know you miss her but I just, I can’t risk losing you. She might lie to you and say I’m mean or something.” You just nodded in acceptance, giving up at attempting to convince him to let you see her again.
“I’m going to the bathroom and then I’ll help you clean up from dinner.” Just staring blankly in front of you, you nodded and laid your chin on your folded arms on the table. Longingly staring at the door, you thought about how easy it would be to leave. It wasn’t like you had much to lose so you waited for Taeyong to step out of the kitchen and head into the bathroom.
Squeezing out of the chair, you refused to move it, afraid that the scraping of the chair on the floor would alert him. Quickly but quietly, you approached the door, terrified that he would return soon. You had the first lock unlocked but when you heard the toilet flush, you didn’t care about the volume of your escape. Your only concern was getting out of the apartment.
“What the fuck are you doing?” Taeyong yelled from the bathroom and when you had the door open finally, his arms were already around your waist.
“No Taeyong, let me go. I do not want you near me right now.” His grip around your waist only got tighter. “Oh baby, I’m always gonna be right by your side, and there’s nothing you can do about it.” He was trying to drag you away from the door but struggled to do so when you started dragging your feet and kicking at him.
Screams were starting to leave your throat, some words and others just noise. “No! Let go of me!” Taeyong rolled his eyes at you, thinking about how dramatic you were being. You loved him and he loved you, so much. You shouldn’t be running away from him.
“You love me, stop whining.” His voice was eerily calm, calmer than normal. “I don’t love you, what the fuck are you talking about? I want you to let go of me!” Taeyong started mumbling to himself and the words flying quietly out of his mouth made you think that you should’ve gone along with it. “You…what? You don’t love me?”
All of a sudden it was like you couldn’t even struggle anymore, Taeyong had found a way to keep you still. “Well, if you don’t love me, I’ll just have to keep you here until you do. Until I can trust you to not leave me.”
“Taeyong! Please! I don’t want this; I want you to go away!” Tears were rushing down your face, but the sob that was trying to bubble up stayed in your throat. “But if I go away who will stay with you? This is why you wonder why people don’t love you, it’s because you push them away.” His grip loosened and soon he dropped you on the floor and started to grab his coat. “Fine, I tried to love you, but I guess you just don’t want to be loved. Goodbye Y/n.”
You watched him leave the apartment and instead of feeling relieved, you felt empty. What if he was right? What if you were hard to love? Did you really push everyone away? It would make sense, he had a point, a good one. He knew you better than anyone else. Taeyong knew you better than you knew yourself.
Maybe if you got up now, you’d still be able to catch him, he couldn’t have made it to his car that fast. Getting up as fast as you could, you ran to the door and threw it open. But when you started running out, your face hit a hard wall immediately. The wall’s hands fell to your hips in attempt to steady you and then you realized you knew this wall.
“Taeyong! I’m so s-” his left pointer finger contacted your lips before you could get out your apology. “No, I should be the one apologizing, what I said was rude and unnecessary, I was upset and let my emotions take over me. I’m sorry for the pain I caused you, that is what I try to avoid, you getting hurt. I am truly and genuinely ashamed that I was the one to cause you pain.”
His apology made your heart ache and only caused you to feel bad for the way you treated him. “No, Yongie, I’m sorry for always being so difficult and I never meant to push you away, you’ve always been there to help me, and I am forever grateful for you. I didn’t mean it when I said I didn’t love you, I do, I love you more than I’ve ever loved anyone ever and I’m sorry I hurt your feelings.” The boy smiled at you and cupped your cheek, he used his other hand to help pick you up off the floor and pulled you into his arms. “We’re both sorry and we both love each other, how about we leave it at that? No more tears tonight.” He wiped the remaining droplets with his thumbs and let you back inside.
“I’ve learned that you get tired after being upset, so let’s lay down and rest up before the new day.” You silently agreed and allowed Taeyong to pick you up when he asked for permission. “It’ll be okay Y/n, just forget about it, no more sniffles.” You giggled and leaned your head on his shoulder when he made his way through your living room, down the hallway, and soon into the bedroom.
Taeyong had been correct, whenever you were upset, you got awfully tired, as soon as your head hit the pillow, you were already at the point between being awake and being asleep. The last thing you remembered from the night was Taeyong kissing your forehead and rubbing your arm soothingly.
“In the morning, text Chaeyoung and ask her to meet you for bunch.” You smiled, glad that you would see her again.
 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Chaeyoung broke the silence, asking the question to receive the possible answer that feared her. “Does he hurt you?” You told the truth immediately, “No, he doesn’t hurt me. Not physically at least, he’ll hurt my feelings when he’s mad, but he apologizes soon after. In his defense, most of the time, I’m asking for it.”  
She just sipped her smoothie in silence, thinking about what to say without hurting your fragile state. Chaeyoung knew that you weren’t telling her something, you kept fidgeting, looking around, as if you were being watched. The only thing she didn’t know was that you were, Taeyong was lurking around the corner, like he always was, because it’s his job.
“Y/n…I know something is wrong, tell me what it is.” But she didn’t say it, she wrote it. Her frantic handwriting was now on one of the napkins, she all but threw you the pen and waited for your response.
You knew that Taeyong was somewhere behind you, always observing your surroundings. So, you mouthed your next words carefully and slowly, making sure Chaeyoung caught every last syllable. It’s going to sound really fucking weird. You’re not going to believe me, but I need you to.
Instead of saying something out loud, she just nodded and waited for you to write down everything. You could see her trying to read your writing upside down, but you covered the napkin, not wanting her to skip anything. She needed to read it all.
Deciding to summarize everything to save time and to save your wrist some pain, ending your sentence with an explanation point, you passed the paper to Chaeyoung. Sitting back and watching her expressions, waiting for her reaction, you needed her to believe you, you didn’t know what you would do if she didn’t.
Chaeyoung never said anything for the rest of the brunch date, but she wrote, I know how to get rid of him. You released the breath caught in your throat, thankful that she was someone who believed and knew about “other-worldly” things.
Paying the bill and nodding in farewell, you parted ways as soon as you got out of the door, an unspoken promise to text later. Taeyong wouldn’t know what you guys said over text unless he looked at it. He could hear and see you, but he wouldn’t be able to see writing unless he was right over your shoulder. Taeyong was your guardian angel but there were still rules he needed to follow, although some rules didn’t seem too important to him.
You didn’t look back at Chaeyoung and you were glad, because as expected, Taeyong appeared at your side. “How was your brunch?” He peeked his head over your shoulder, and you hated how cute you thought he looked, how cute he was. “It was good, but uh- Tae? I want to ask you something.”
He smiled and gave you a looked that told you to continue, and with a deep breath to calm yourself, you let it out. “I feel like over the past months we’ve been together, I’ve done my best to show you how much I love you, and I was hoping you trust me by now. Would it be okay if I hung out with Chae, without you around me, visible or invisible, I want to hang out with her alone. She’s gonna help me find a gift for you.” You squeezed his hand in emphasis, hoping it would lead his mind to his favorite things. Sex and you.
Taeyong didn’t say anything at first, just thinking to himself. He wanted you to continue to love him, but he was created to protect you, you in all of your lifetimes, both past and future, as well as this one. “I suppose you can, I will give you three hours to hang out with her and I won’t even watch over you, but you have to promise me that at any moment you feel unsafe or any pain, you text me, immediately.”
Barely able to hide the joy, you kissed him. You knew he liked kissing you, and unable to lie to yourself, you knew that you liked kissing him as well. Hating the way he made you feel, you deepened the kiss, knowing it would be one of the last. “Thank you Yongie, I love you, so much.”
A few minutes later, once you two had made it to the comfort of your own home, Taeyong had you bent over the kitchen counter with your pants and panties around your ankles. “You smell so good.” You felt his nose meet your clenching hole, inhaling your arousal. Letting yourself indulge in this, one last time, your muscles relaxed, until a feeling you had only felt once take over. His tongue licked over your puckered rim. Every time Taeyong had tried this with you, you turned down his advances, but this time, you weren’t going to. At this point, you were going to do anything to keep him happy.
Taeyong waited for you to tense up and push him away, but once you didn’t, he kissed your hole. “Fuck, are you really gonna let me in there?” You whined in approval when you felt his mouth go back down to your pussy.
 His tongue went back and forth between your folds, with the occasional lap around your ass. “I’m sorry but I don’t think I can wait, I need to be in you.” You moaned at the loss but it was replaced by a yell when Taeyong swiftly turned you around and entered your cunt.
 “Oh fuck, always so tight for me. No matter how many times I fuck you, you’re always so fucking tight.” Taeyong’s teeth gritted together and picked you up off your feet. Walking the two of you to the couch, he never once removed you off his cock. Sitting down on the couch, his hands were placed on your hips, forcing you up and down onto his cock, forcing you to ride him.
 “Open your mouth.” You listened to his command. He took one hand off of your hips and placed two fingers in your mouth. “Suck on them.” Sucking and licking as much as you could with the overwhelming pleasure, your moans interrupted your task. Taeyong deemed your work not good enough and started fucking his fingers into your mouth, wetting them as much as possible.
 While you were distracted with the feeling of his fingers dragging along your tongue and hitting the back of your throat at some points, his cock continuously slammed into the spot that made you clench your pussy around him. With each contraction of your walls, Taeyong let out a whine that caused your pussy to gush more arousal.
“Fuck, making such a mess. Can feel you leaking all the way to my balls.” His fingers were triggering your gag reflex and it caused tears to run down your face, you couldn’t hold it in or control it at all at this point. “My messy baby, made just for me.”
He removed his fingers, and his spit-soaked hand left your eyesight. But the mystery was soon solved when you felt his fingers circle your asshole. “Taeyong-” He didn’t stop or slow at the sound of your whines and soon one of his fingers were forcing its way through your unused hole.
You gasped once you got used to the initial stretch and pain when Taeyong played with the walls that haven’t ever been touched. He barely gave you any time to prepare for the next finger though because soon it was joining the first.
“Oh fuck, next time, I’m gonna shove my cock in there. Fill your ass with my cum. Make you my horny little bitch.” The way he was talking to you made you humiliatingly wet and he didn’t let it go unnoticed.
“Maybe you’re already my little bitch, you’re ruining the couch with your slutty cum. But my stupid baby can’t help it huh?” You were out of it, the feeling of both your holes being filled and your clit grinding against his pelvic bone, you whined, but Taeyong didn’t take that as an answer.
His free hand made contact with your face, slapping you. He grabbed your cheeks and forced you to stare at him. “You’re my messy little bitch, aren’t you?”
“Yes, Tae- I am. M’gonna cum. Need to cum.” You were babbling and Taeyong laughed at your attempts to speak. “I’m close too, are you gonna squirt all over me?” You just nodded.
The hand that was holding your face still was removed and took place at your pussy. When your cunt clenched one last time Taeyong pinched your clit and you let it all go. The whine that left your throat intensified at the feeling of his hot cum filling you up. Your grip on his shoulders tightened while he rode out the rest of your highs.
“Welcome back baby, you left me there for a minute.” When your eyes opened you were in your shared bed, wearing his clothes, and looking up at him with tired eyes. You giggled at him and allowed him to pull you to his chest, holding you close after the intense feeling your body endured.
“I hope you enjoyed yourself.” Taeyong petted your hair soothingly. “I did, did you?” You felt him nod and heard him yawn, interrupting himself. “I always do when it’s with you.”
The last thing you heard him say was, “I hope you enjoy your time with Chaeyoung tomorrow.” And everything came crashing down again.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~“So, what’s going to happen afterwards is that Taeyong will still exist, but he won’t be your guardian angel anymore. He won’t be able to watch you anymore and he won’t be able to have an influence on your or your life, unless you allow him to. You have to stay strong if you ever run into him again.” Just nodding along, you looked at Chaeyoung, waiting for her to continue.
“Since you can’t exactly survive without a guardian angel, so you’ll be getting a new one. The only downside is that he isn’t an angel. He’s from hell because if Taeyong does somehow regain his power, another angel wouldn’t be able to stop him, only someone who isn’t good.” You felt better knowing that you’ll still be protected from the evils of the world, but more importantly, from Taeyong.”
Chaeyoung reached over towards you and grasped your hand, trying to comfort you since you weren’t saying anything. With her other hand that wasn’t holding yours, she lit the black candle.
“Alright, are you ready for this?” Chaeyoung whispered into the dark, the only light source in the room was the now lit candle sitting between you. With a shaking breath, you nodded your head. “I’m kind of nervous but this needs to happen.” You looked over to her, only seeing two emotions on her face. Relief and since its Chaeyoung, there’s of course excitement mixed in.
You looked at the floor you were sitting on, taking in everything. Taeyong would be gone and out of your life soon.
Chae was looking down at the worn book she had in her lap, reading over the page, making sure everything was correct. She had gone over different things you would need and made sure you had them. “Do you have a piece of his hair?” You held up a little plastic baggie that held a few strands of Taeyong’s hair.
You were thankful that his hair was the only thing you needed to bring, Chaeyoung on the other hand was more than happy to bring all of the “weird” items. A variety of dried herbs sat around you two, with several other items, such as feathers from ravens and crows, serpent skulls, a vial with a dead black widow spider and a bunch of salt that surrounded you and all of your items. From an overhead view, one would see the shape the salt was in, a pentagram.
“Okay, I’m going to read the script and you’re going to toss the pieces of his hair into the flame of the candle.” You just nodded and opened the bag to take out his hair. “Let’s just get this over with, okay? It’ll all be over soon.”
Looking over the flame one last time you dipped your head in approval. Chaeyoung squeezed your hand and started chanting. Words you didn’t know were calmly yet fiercely flying out of her mouth, in a language that you could only describe as something like Latin.
While Chaeyoung was chanting, the flame grew wild, and you grew afraid of the fire taking over the stick of wax. Your eyes widened when the flame spread to the pentagram of salt. Soon, every grain of salt was on fire, and you didn’t know what to do. Chaeyoung saw what was happening, but she just kept chanting, her voice growing in volume as the fire grew in size. The fire however, stayed on top of the salt, never going outside of the lines or inside, closer to the two of you, but the heat was starting to get to you.
You wanted to reach out to her, but she told you beforehand, under no circumstances should you move or speak until it was safe. She had mentioned the fire, but you now understood just how much you underestimated her words. Chaeyoung had spoken up about how intense this would get since you were dealing with higher powers. With everything running through your head, you still looked at Chaeyoung and listened for her to stop talking, that’s when you would do the one thing, she told you to do.
Droplets hit your thighs and since you weren’t able to look down, you assumed it was sweat. But when you moved your hand up to wipe your cheeks, you felt the drops of liquid come from your eyes. You hadn’t even realized that you were crying but you weren’t able to think about it for too long, because Chaeyoung had stopped talking and the look in her eye altered.
The fine strands of hair that had been pinched between your fingers were heavier than you thought, or it was your conscious, but you needed this. Raising your shaky hand, you hovered it over the orange flame that had ingulfed the candle, the wax starting to spread across the hardwood floors.
Your fingers were pressed tightly against each other so much so that when you released Taeyong’s hair, your fingertips ached. Almost in slow motion, the dark hair fluttered in the air, mixing with the ambers of the fire. When you expected the hair to float down, it never touched the ground, an amber touched the end of each one, and slowly it burned. Burned into nothing. As soon as each hair disintegrated, the fire disappeared altogether. The room was dark, silent, and oddly cold.
You opened your mouth, attempting to whisper out to Chaeyoung, but nothing came out, too scared to do anything.
“It’s okay. He’s gone now, he can’t hurt you anymore.” Your head was spinning, and your eyes were straining from trying to see in the dark. Still too afraid to say anything, you and Chaeyoung sat in silence.
The silence went on for a bit until you remembered something Chaeyoung said at the beginning of this. “What about the new guy?”
“He should already be here. Normally guardian angels aren’t supposed to show themselves but obviously Taeyong didn’t listen to that rule, since he still has his human form and he will most likely live out the rest of his life here on Earth, your new guardian will also take a human form. It will act as a precaution just incase Taeyong tries anything.” You looked around the room since she said he should already be here but because of the room still being pitch black, you didn’t have any luck.
All of a sudden, the almost completely burnt-out candle, relit. When you the light illuminated the room, you jumped. A man was sitting next to you, one that was beautifully sinister. “I guess I’m your new guardian angel.” He smiled a big toothy smile, but it didn’t show genuine happiness, his smile should sinful excitement.
You looked over at Chae in worry. “Oh, don’t worry, I can’t do anything fun. Your witchy friend set a little curse on me so I behave.” Your eyes met the man’s and you nodded sheepishly at him.
“What’s your name?” Chaeyoung interrupted the staring contest you were unwillingly in, but even though you looked away, the man continued to stare. “Yuta” you offered your own name, but he already knew it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~You were happy with Yuta being your guardian angel, or demon. He kept his distance, protected you, all while developing a friendship with you. He understood your boundaries but still warned you before going out, to just be aware if Taeyong was near. The best part about Yuta though, was that he was the first man and third overall person that Ferguson liked.
Whenever you had an uneasy feeling, but still needed to go out, Yuta offered to go with you, but never making the decision for you.
“So, we just need things for the apartment, like paper towels, toilet paper, cereal, food for Ferguson. Things like that.” You read off your list, allowing Yuta to guide you through the aisles of the super store.
Yuta helped you look for the items that you needed and asked if you wanted him to carry the big bag of cat food.
“I could get it for her.” Taeyong.
“Fuck off man, leave her alone. You already ruined her life so just let us be.” Yuta stepped in front of you, doing what he was summoned to do. Taeyong just laughed condescendingly, not intimidated by Yuta at all.
“You know you still love me, and there’s nothing you can do about it. You can’t deny the way you felt about me before you knew who I truly was.” His attention was now directed at you and you hated how he was right. You did love Taeyong, but he also lied to you, and then abused the power he had over you. You hated the fact that if Taeyong never gave away his secret, you would still be with him.
“C’mon baby, admit it. You still love me, and you miss me.” Shaking your head, not in disagreement but in denial, Taeyong stepped forward. Yuta’s aura changed, no longer in the laid-back vibe he normally gave off but now it was protective.
Yuta set the bag of food down on the ground next to you so his hands would be empty. “I’m not gonna ask you again man, step back.” Yuta warned Taeyong one last time but even with the warning, Taeyong stepped forward. And then he was gone.
“Taeyong?” Nothing remained in the spot in which he stood, and your first reaction was to grasp for him, anything left. “Is he gone? Forever?” Your knees hit the cold floor and the material of your jeans did nothing to stop the chill.
Yuta’s hand was heavy yet comforting on your shoulder. You stood up and buried your face into his chest, seeking some kind of comfort. He was gentler than you thought he would be. His arms wrapped around your back, matching the tightness in which you held him. One of his hands reached up and he ran his fingers through your hair.
“How about we go get something to eat and shop another time?” You agreed but still asked to buy the cat food since Ferguson needed it.
The emptiness in your stomach was mistaken for hunger, but you knew that wasn’t it. There was a park across the street from the store and in the park parking lot, there was a food truck. Still carrying the bag of food, Yuta offered you his hand and walked you over to the food truck.
“What are you thinking about getting?” You really didn’t care about what you ate, you just wanted something to fill the void that was now in your stomach. “I’ll just get whatever you get.” He squeezed your hand, understanding that you didn’t want to speak much.
After eating you were able to calm down, maybe it was the food, but you enjoyed the company more. Yuta did this thing where he made up stories and double lives for the people around you, and he kept making them crazier and crazier when he saw that it made you smile. You even made up a few but your imagination wasn’t nearly as creative and wild as Yuta’s.
You finished making a story about an old lady who was a secret agent assassin in her youth when you noticed Yuta’s silence. And after him making you feel better, you were kind of sad that he was no longer in a good mood.
“What’s the matter Yuta?” You looked out over the water. The sight of the sun reflecting off of the water calming you. But that feeling was quickly replaced by something not nearly as pleasant.
“I can’t say I blame Taeyong for everything he’s done. I’m starting to want you all to myself as well.”
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fellthemarvelous · 5 months
Text
Aziraphale my love
Please enjoy my WHOLE ASS OPINION AND META ANALYSIS.
I support Petty Bitch Aziraphale for season 3!! The angels have been talking down to him from the very beginning and mocking him. Every single person in his life has insulted his intelligence (yes, Crowley has done so several times). I want to see him GO OFF!!! (I posted this part as a tweet but Twitter doesn't give me enough room to write it all in one big place like Tumblr).
Like I am ready to GO THE FUCK OFF myself!
All of Heaven has been emotionally, verbally and physically abusive to Aziraphale since the very beginning. They never listen to him, and the only one he ever really wants to talk to anyway is God, but she is nowhere to be found.
Gabriel came to Aziraphale because he experienced something that Aziraphale is very familiar with. He couldn't remember why he was going to Aziraphale, but hiding away his memory in a fly ended up being just as much for Aziraphale's protection as his own. It ended up being the only way he could actually explain to Aziraphale and Crowley what was really going on.
Aziraphale was there to witness Gabriel's open expression of love for a demon and it lit a fire in his heart. He and Crowley could be together.
Aziraphale wanted Crowley to be by his side in Heaven so he could stand in front of all the angels and tell them how much he loves Crowley so they can see that there is more to life than death for humans.
Aziraphale thought taking Crowley with him meant he could continue to protect Crowley from ever going back to Hell. It's not like he's forgotten how Crowley was acting after being dragged down into Hell for saving the life of a human and persuading her to be not just pretend-y good but actually good. Aziraphale giving her the money was the temptation to always be a good person. They saved her soul together, Crowley with the angelic act, and Aziraphale's act was the temptation. They were so used to doing each other's jobs by this point that they switched roles in that scene.
Despite their last fight, Crowley came back and saved him from the Nazis in the church, and Aziraphale had that moment of realization. "Oh my God, I'm in love with my demon." Crowley wasn't interested in the holy water when he saved Aziraphale, and he saved Aziraphale's books. They also killed three Nazis in the process, which is the most romantic part of it all. The Nazis were a source of evil for Hell, so you know Hell told him to keep an eye on the Nazis. Hell was full of Nazis! We saw Furfur complain about processing 52 men called Otto. It's not normal for that to happen in Hell, and it's really starting to piss Furfur off!!
Aziraphale and Crowley working together in 1941 is the first time we see someone in Hell say WE ARE FULL GO AWAY. Hell turned some of the worst of the worst against humanity by turning them into flesh-eating zombies. "The dead shall rise from their graves and roam the Earth once more." Furfur was the first one to set Hell's prisoners free, and in true demon style, his plan backfired against him, but he'd already set the ball rolling on the Second Coming.
The man who owned the magic shop did not want to sell the Bullet Catch to Aziraphale because he could tell right away that Aziraphale was in desperate need of help as he'd just knocked down half the things on the front counter and he would absolutely die just like that Lovely Chinese Fellow (and that seems like a pretty relevant clue). The shopkeeper only sold it to Aziraphale after Crowley handed him money from Aziraphale's wallet (Aziraphale didn't even try to stop him) and used it to tempt the shopkeeper into going against his instincts.
And in true demon fashion, that immediately backfired because it was only then did he realize Aziraphale was going to need a partner, and he was the only one who could do it. I don't think either of them were thinking about what the trick actually entailed. Aziraphale just saw a gun and was like LET'S DO THIS!
They survived the Bullet Catch in a very human way. They couldn't perform miracles and had very human reactions to the situation, but Aziraphale trusted Crowley with that gun pointed at his head.
And when Aziraphale used a human magic trick to save Crowley from being taken back to Hell by Furfur, he proved that he was willing to go to great lengths to keep Crowley safe even though Crowley was a demon.
This entire time he has been trying to give Crowley a place to call home. He painted the walls of the bookshop yellow because they are the same color as Crowley's eyes, which are also the least human thing about him. He has written about him in his journals and he's openly affectionate with Crowley. He always gives Crowley gentle touches and praises him. He loves Crowley and he's showing him in the most human way he knows how.
And when Crowley is losing Aziraphale, he shows Aziraphale his love in the most human way he can think of.
Heaven and Hell have invaded Whickber Street and put the lives of all the humans at risk. The problem is worse than he thought, and he's going back to try and fix it so that Heaven will actually try to be good for once. Not just pretend-y good, but properly good. Everyone is in danger, and I think when the Metatron mentions the Second Coming, Aziraphale completes the puzzle he's been trying to put together since hearing Jim singing a human song. It makes him understand what Gabriel was running away from, and he's the one who gave Gabriel the freedom to run away with Beelzebub.
And the Metatron is not pleased. Aziraphale introduced free will to demons and angels just as Crowley had introduced free will to humanity.
Aziraphale wants to help spread the idea of love and free will around Heaven so it can be better. He's doing something he believes is right with all his heart. He's been on Earth for more than 6,000 years. He remembers the lessons he learned. He knows shades of grey exist and he wants to use this to make Heaven a better place.
But the other archangels have never respected him, and now he's the Supreme Archangel. He has a chance to make things better, and he has done Crowley's job before. He wants to talk to God. He wants to know what it is she wants. He's tired of hearing everyone else speak for God when no one has spoken to God in thousands of years.
And when he told Crowley his idea, Crowley became angry with him and called him an idiot. What he was saying was not what Crowley was hearing because Crowley was trying to confess his love while Aziraphale was trying to tell Crowley his plan to save everyone.
He only wanted to go back to Heaven when he believed he would be able to take Crowley with him, and he thought reinstating Crowley as an angel was the safest way to keep him from ever having to return to Hell.
None of Aziraphale's actions were malicious. None of his actions were to hurt Crowley. He didn't realize how bad his words sounded because he was saying something completely different than what Crowley was hearing.
All of it was a big misunderstanding. If Aziraphale had not taken the coffee from the Metatron, he would have been choosing death. The Metatron is punishing him for going against Heaven by forcing him to go back. Aziraphale only believed it was a choice when he was told he could bring back Crowley.
Aziraphale had the illusion of choice. He knew the Metatron wasn't taking no for an answer, and when Crowley rejected his offer, he still had to go back anyway. When he looked back at Crowley before stepping on that elevator, he knew he was breaking Crowley's heart by not going back to him, but he had no choice. It broke his heart too.
So now he's stuck in Heaven after having the worst fight with Crowley. He probably feels like no one believes in him. Crowley had called him an idiot and then Crowley kissed him. He's confused because he doesn't understand why Crowley is upset with him, but he's probably tired of everyone underestimating him.
Let Aziraphale be done with this shit. Let him be petty about it. He's not holding back anymore. I want him to push back just as hard and stand up for himself. He has earned the right.
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(😶 so I can find this later)
AITA for telling someone to move on past rude comments? This happened a while ago but I'm curious about Tumblr's thoughts. TW: SA
I (29M) was part of a gaming group online and got along fairly well at first but I was getting frustrated with Sara (early 20sF) as she was very negative about basically everything. I stayed with the group because my then boyfriend John (mid20sM) played with them and we had been friends. There were three other people in our group, Mike (late20sM), Anne (early 20sF), and Luke (early 20sFtM).
We had invited a new person to our group and he had gotten along well with us but made some inappropriate comments to Anne (his comments were "I can see your character's nipple lol" when Anne posted art of her character and, when Anne said she "was ready to rumble" for an in game event he replied "I'll rumble you.") Anne said she did not like these comments and we asked her what she wanted done. She said not to remove him from the group but tell him to stop so the new guy was told to stop. He apologized, said he never meant to make Anne uncomfortable, and immediately stopped the behaviour.
Sara and Mike frequently complained in a private discord channel about the new guy and called him a predator. Any time new guy interacted with a female identifying person they talked about how he needs to be watched since he was likely to harass that woman too.
I told John I was frustrated as Sara had run off several potential new friends to the group already, people who had done nothing inappropriate but she just felt were cringe. I told John what I wanted to say to Sara and he said I could say those things. I ended up pointing out that new guy apologized and stopped the behaviour so what else can we ask of him? If his actions are too far then why are we keeping him around? It looked like Sara was trying to run him off and we should either get rid of him or drop it because we had resolved it as a group. Sara said she was very good friends with Anne and that Anne was crying everyday due to the triggering effect this man had on her. I said that we could remove him if Anne wanted it but she needed to ask it or else it was Sara's decision and not Anne's. We ended up having a massive blowout fight and Sara said I was a sexual abuse enabler among other insults.
I would later find out that Luke, Sara, and Anne were all SA survivors (I did not know this at all before) because John told me I need to learn to talk about rape and tore into me for saying the things he said I could say. John would also learn that neither Anne nor Luke felt particularly triggered by new guy and neither were crying like Sara had said.
My offline friends, some of which disclosed they were SA survivors to me, all think Sara was trying to be overprotective of her friends and that nothing I said was really out of line but I'm curious about Tumblr's take. I'm no longer part of that friend group or relationship (the relationship had multiple reasons it ended).
So, was I the asshole for asking Sara to stop complaining about the new guy?
What are these acronyms?
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silentglassbreak · 4 months
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Anonymous
Noah Sebastian x OFC
!!!There is finally smut in this chapter!!!!
Warnings: Alcohol abuse, overall abuse, mild violence (ie. bar fights), smut, swearing, and altogether just a lot of fuckery.
+It goes without saying, this is a work of fiction. All of my words are my own. Plagiarism is a crime.
Taglist: @flowery-mess
Part 5 - Bad Decisions
Three months and three days, since I had met Noah Sebastian. Since he had walked into my group, reserved and exhausted, ready for a change. Three months and one day since I had agreed to be his sponsor. Since I had taken on the role of maintaining his sanity and sobriety with him. Three months exactly since Noah kissed me, causing me to pull back on our relationship.
I had given myself a silent rule that I never told Noah: we did not meet in person, outside of group, unless it was dire. So far, we had not gotten to that point.
He called me often, needing support. We talked on the phone, sometimes for only a few minutes while he panicked, I calmed him down, and he focused on breathing. Sometimes, we talked for a long time. I suspected he called me at times, out of pure boredom.
Two weeks after his show in Hollywood, he finally told the members of the band that he had began AA. As I suspected, they were all very supportive, most notably, Nick Ruffilo, his best friend since childhood. He even brought Nick to our last 'Loved Ones' session, where we asked everyone to bring someone in their lives who supported their recovery. Some people only brought their sponsors, but some brought their husbands, wives. Girlfriends. I always brought Laura.
I met Nick that day. He was polite, had the most charming smile, and shook my hand respectfully.
"You're the famous Leena, huh?" Noah had been talking to Syd when Nick approached me.
"Famous?" I quirked my eyebrow. He smiled brightly.
"You've kept my boy straight for a whole month."
I nodded in understanding. As fate may have it, the day Nick came to group, was the same day Noah had earned his 30-day coin. He had earned himself a large round of applause, as well as his favorite flavor of cupcakes in class. Red velvet, cream cheese frosting, graham cracker dust. I'll never forget, I asked Laura to make them.
Nick cared deeply for Noah, I could see it. I knew the other members, Folio and Jolly, did as well, but I believed Nick was his best source of support.
I broached the subject with Noah about a week later of Nick being his sponsor. I saw the look on his face while he sipped on his coffee, group having just ended.
"Oh, I didn't even think about it." He was looking at the ground, something he regularly did when he was uncomfortable.
"I mean, it was just an idea?" I tried to stay warm, comforting. Noah didn't always go for that. He had his moments where he felt patronized, and preferred I be straight with him. Usually when he was in a bad mood.
"I could ask him, I guess." He still wouldn't look at me.
I sighed, quirking my lips in a smile. "You don't have to. I'm happy to keep being your sponsor, Noah."
He looked at me finally, through his lashes. "You just know how to pull me back from the brink. He doesn't."
I nodded in understanding. "Guess you're stuck with me then." I beamed at him, earning a smile back.
Today, Noah was earning his 90-day coin, right before he leaves for tour. He got to go first in group, discussing his experience through recovery. He also got his special cupcakes, Laura turning up special to deliver them by hand. He was like a kid in a candy store, nearly hopping up and down when she handed him his special cupcake, bigger than the rest. He was ever thankful that she was a talented baker, promising to bring him and the band cupcakes during their tour dates here in LA.
The band had added 17 additional tour dates, beginning the tour in the summer instead of fall. They would have three months off from June to September, and would head to Europe in December. The success of the band was exciting, and stressful all the same for Noah. I saw the toll it took.
Two weeks ago, he finally told his girlfriend about his recovery. We didn't talk about Lily often at all, but he definitely did not want to discuss that subject. I gathered that it did not go well. All I learned was that she told him she needed space, and backed out of tagging along on the first part of the tour with them. She promised to catch up in September.
I saw how this affected Noah, and his sad days had been more frequent lately. Seeing him happy to be receiving his coin was a relief.
"Can I make a request for my 90-day?" He sat in his regular chair, directly across the circle from me, his too-dark eyes on mine.
"Within reason." I responded with a suspicious grin.
"Can you tell me one thing about you that I don't already know?" Everyone in group looked directly to me, including our two newcomers. All eyes seemed confused. As was I.
"Like what?" I crossed my legs, trying to hide my uncomfortable posture.
"Anything."
I blinked, my head swirling. Something he didn't know? We had learned quite a bit about each other over the last three months. In group or on the phone, we had played twenty questions more than once.
"Well," I sighed, knowing that my confession would be news to everyone, as I never talked about it. "my sponsor is my Dad."
He looked taken back, not expecting that. "Really?"
I nodded coolly. "Yep. Since I got sober three years ago." I relaxed a bit in my chair. "He's the reason I got sober."
Noah sat back and folded his arms, intent on listening to me. He gestured for me to continue.
"At 25, I was set down the worst road. I had been actively drinking since I was 16, and really struggling since 18. I dropped out of college, went through job after job, ended up in jail a few times. And that's the mild stuff. I won't bore you all with the gruesome details." I glanced around the room. The only person who knew even half of my story was Abel, and he was unfortunately not here today, so I felt vulnerable.
"My mother was an alcoholic, who died when I was very young from her addictions." I could feel tears threatening to come to the surface. My throat was forming a lump I just couldn't swallow. "My Dad, who swore to never drink again after she died, decided that once I hit rock bottom, to take me to her gravesite."
I looked down at my hands, feeling my voice shake. "He had purchased a plot for me right next to her when I turned 21, because he swore I would be with her sooner rather than later."
One traitorous tear spilled down my cheek, and I wiped it away feverishly. "So I had him drive me to a meeting. He stayed with me. Came with me to every single one."
I laughed at the thought. "He would sit in the car and listen to Country music while he waited. And every time I fell off, he drove me right back. He's my rock. He's the reason I'm alive."
I was still looking at my hands when I heard the clapping. My head snapped up to see Noah, his hands clapping together before everyone else joined. It was a liberating moment, but I was still vulnerable.
I checked my watch, noticing that we were over on our time.
"Thank you, everyone." The applause died down. "I appreciate each and every one of you. Unfortunately, we've got to get out of here before Angie comes in and rips me a new one."
-
At home, Angel and I were curled up on the couch, enjoying our favorite movie (it was my favorite, so it was his favorite by default), Silent Hill. I was tossing him single popcorn kernels as I ate and watched intently.
"See, baby, this is the part where all of the piece of shit cultists get what they deserve!" He looked at me with his honey brown eyes, clearly understanding every word I said.
My ringtone went off, and I almost ignored it, because we were so close to the end, and figured the call could wait until after. That is, until I realized it was Noah's ringtone. I had switched his a while ago to a song by his own band, so I knew when it needed to be answered at any cost.
I rushed over to the kitchen counter, not even bothering to pause the movie.
"Hello?"
"I need a fucking drink, Leena." His voice was cracked, and sounded wet. Was he...crying?
"No, you don't." My immediate response anytime he said that.
"No Leena, I'm driving to a bar. I can't fucking do this."
The panic rose in my chest, threatening to spill in the form of vomit. No, not now. Not after we've worked this hard.
"Noah Sebastian, I will kick you out of group."
"Who fucking cares?" I scoffed.
"Uh, you do, apparently. You called me."
"Mostly just calling to let you know I'm a fucking failure. So, sorry to waste your time."
My mouth worked faster than I could stop it. "Come to my place."
He was quiet. "Nah, bar sounds better."
"Noah, come see me. Please. And if you still want a drink afterwards, then I won't stop you."
I could tell he was perusing this. "You don't ever see me outside of group, remember?"
"Well, fuck that for right now. Come see me."
He groaned. "Leena, it's midnight. You should be asleep."
"Yet, I'm awake. 3AM ice cream, remember?"
There was silence, only the sound of a blinker in the background.
"Where do you live?"
Without answering, I dropped him my location pin.
"Says I'm ten minutes away." I sighed a breath of relief.
"Door's unlocked."
-
Despite my telling him to come in, he knocked. Angel stood at attention, to which I instructed him to sit and stay. I opened the door to find a soaking wet Noah. I didn't even realize it was raining.
He looked awful. Clearly had been crying, his clothes soaked through from the storm. I grabbed his arm and hastily pulled him in to avoid any more weather getting hold of him.
"Jesus Christ, dude." He just stood in my doorway, staring at me.
A low growl left Angel, bringing our attention to him.
"Angel, come." Robotically, he came to me and I pointed to Noah. "Let him smell you. He's protection trained."
Noah raised a brow. "What kind of dog?"
"He's a mutt. Bluetick Hound and Husky. 90 pounds of death if he doesn't like you."
I saw Noah stiffen slightly as Angel sniffed his legs, shoes, and hands. Once he was satisfied that he was safe, Angel stepped back.
"Go to bed." I pointed to the room and he took off, following the command.
"Hm, good dog." Noah's tone was surprised.
"I live alone in LA, I've got to do something to protect myself."
He nodded and stepped onto the tile floor after me toward the hallway. I noticed how wet he was.
"Wait here. I'll get you some dry clothes."
He looked at me incredulously. "You think they'll fit?"
I rolled my eyes. "Wait here."
I returned two minutes later with a pair of men's sweats and a faded Disturbed t-shirt. "They're my brother's. I'm sure they'll fit."
He nodded in appreciation and I pointed to the bathroom.
He returned moments later, soaking clothes in hand. I walked over and grabbed them from him and walked further down the hall to my laundry room. Checking the many pockets on his pants, I threw his clothing in the dryer and started it.
Padding back into the living room, I waved him over to the couch. We both sat on opposite ends, me leaned back, pulling the throw over myself, him dropping his head into his hands.
"You want to talk about it?" He just shook his head. I pursed my lips. "You want to watch a movie?" He looked up at me from over his shoulder.
"Like what?"
I smiled, picking up my remote. "Well, I just finished Silent Hill, but I've got all the streaming networks, so I can get anything."
He furrowed his brows. "Silent Hill? Like, the game?"
My jaw dropped. "You've never seen the movie?"
He just shook his head. "Can't say I have."
"Well fuck, let me just restart it."
He snorted. "Didn't you just watch it?"
"It's my favorite movie, ever. I'll watch it again."
He sat up straight, then leaned his back on the couch. I reached behind me on the side table, grabbing another blanket and chucking it at him. He smiled a small, sad look at me, and unfolded it over his lap.
During the movie, Noah's demeanor loosened ever so subtly. He started with his back against the couch, arms in his lap, looking unamused. By the first call of the Darkness, he was leaning forward, paying closer attention. At the first sight of Pyramid Head, he was interested. And by the hospital scene, he was asking questions.
"I still don't understand, why does Sharon look like Alessa? And why did the little girl say she was burning?"
"Would you be patient?! We're literally getting to that part right now!" He shook his head and leaned back, crossing his legs underneath him and his body moved slightly closer to my legs that were outstretched on the area between us.
His leg bumped my foot, and he looked over, noticing I was glancing at him.
"Oh, my bad." He scooched back to his side, and I snickered.
"I'm not going to combust if you touch my foot Noah, it's no biggie."
He smirked, mischievously. "Well, in that case." He then stretched his giant self out across the couch, pulling my legs up over his legs. He nestled in, pulling the blanket up to his chest.
It was at this point that I actually noticed.
"Hold the fucking phone." I quickly paused the movie and his head snapped to me.
"What?"
"You cut your fucking hair?!" His hair was easily eight inches shorter, sitting just below his ears. How it took me this long to notice is beyond me.
He laughed nervously, and ran his hand through his locks. "Yeah, after group, I went and got it cut. Felt like I needed a change."
I smiled brightly, reaching over and tousling it. "I like it. It suits you."
He leaned back, his face appreciative.
I played the movie, and he was absolutely enamored. It was always fun watching someone experience this movie for the first time.
Once the credits began to play, his eyes were much brighter. "Are you tired?"
I shook my head. "Nah, not right now."
"Want to watch another one?"
I stood up. "Sure, but I've got to pee and grab a water bottle. You want one?"
He nodded, swiping the remote and scrolling through the networks to find another movie.
I called Angel to his bed in the living room, and took care of my business. When I returned, he had 13 Ghosts pulled up on the screen.
"Can we watch my favorite now?" I smirked.
"Absolutely, it is also one of my favorites."
He pressed play, and I walked past him, my thigh catching the edge of the couch, causing me to stumble toward the coffee table.
Before I could connect with the glass, his arm was around my arm, pulling me back toward the couch. I landed square in his lap. It took me a second to process. He smiled at me nervously.
"Sorry, didn't want you getting a concussion."
I slid off his lap, but was now seated closer to him, by side nearly pressed against his chest. He turned his attention back to the TV, throwing his blanket over the both of us casually.
I pulled my bare legs up under the blanket, now very aware that all I wore was a pair of too-short gym shorts, a plain white t-shirt, and socks. I was home alone earlier, in my defense. My knee was pressing into the side of his leg, but he didn't seem to notice.
His body radiated so much heat, I instinctively sunk down further under the blanket. His gargantuan arm was draped over the back of the couch, the back of my head pressed against it.
I let myself get into the movie for a while. We made it about half an hour in before I felt him shift. He stretched his legs in front of me, now in near full laying position. His arm tugged my shoulder and I looked at him.
His eyes were honest, or so it seemed. "It's just cuddling. I haven't had anyone to cuddle with in a while."
I pondered this for a moment. My brain screamed against it, told me it was wrong and I knew where this could go. But he was so warm. He was so comfortable. I slid down, stretching my legs over his, my chest laying on his. My face had nowhere to go but on his collarbone while I tried desperately to watch the television.
Something tugged at me, which I tried to ignore for a while. I couldn't for too long before I piped up.
"How would your girlfriend feel about us 'just cuddling'?"
I felt his chest still, his breathing stopped for a beat.
"She dumped me." I snapped my head up
"What?"
He sighed, not looking back at me. "Why do you think I needed a drink?"
"Oh, Noah." I moved to sit up, but his arm around my waist held me in place while he squeezed his eyes shut.
"Can we please just...not?" When he looked back at me, he had a single tear trying to escape from the corner of his eye.
"Okay." I softly responded and gently leaned back down. His arm secured me in place, while the movie continued to play.
About halfway through, I felt my eyelids getting heavy. His fingers that were holding my waist had been drawing small circles on my back for a few minutes, and I was fading quickly. The warmth, the comfort. He wasn't the only one who hadn't cuddled in a while.
"Are you asleep?"
This roused me. "Hmm? No. Just comfortable." My voice was raspy with sleep, my eyes only half open.
His chest shook with the rumble of a laugh. "You want me to head home?"
I slightly shook my head. "Warm." His hand rubbed up my arm now, coming to rest on the cap of my shoulder. I heard a low humming sound, and realized it was him, humming a tune that I couldn't place.
"It should be illegal to be able to sing that good." This made him snicker.
"Too bad, huh?" I sighed, relaxing. "Maybe if I wasn't so talented, you'd actually like me."
This made me slowly lift my head, narrowing my eyes at him. "You are an insufferable human Noah Sebastian." He smiled a goofy grin at me. "I am trying to relax, here."
His hand came up to brush my hair from my face, his eyes locked on my tired ones.
"You're really beautiful Mileena, you know that?"
I raised my eyebrows, my eyes getting wider. He didn't seem fazed, just studying my face.
"Well...thank you?"
His fingers twirled some stray bands of my hair while his eyes just would not leave mine.
"Would you hate me if I kissed you?"
My stomach bottomed out. I was awake. All the way awake, now. I sighed heavily.
"We can't do that, Noah."
He bit his bottom lip.
"Can't, or won't?"
"Both?"
I rolled onto my side then, slightly breaking the contact between us. He was sat with his head propped on the pillow at the end of the couch. He kept his arm on my waist, but raised himself up just enough to nearly tower over me.
"Would you tell me to stop again?"
He was testing me. I was going to fail if he didn't stop. He felt it.
"Probably."
"Would you make me leave?"
"Is this why you came over? Girlfriend dumps you, so you figure you'd come hook up with your sponsor?" Okay, maybe that came out a little sharper than I intended. But it needed to be said.
"I wasn't planning on coming here. I was set on the bar."
I sighed. He was right. He was on the brink, and I invited him in. Practically begged him.
"Noah, I just...we can't."
His hand reached up to cup the side of my neck, his eyes now fixated on my mouth. I caught the tip of his tongue dart out over his bottom lip.
"Would you make me leave?" He repeated his question.
I didn't answer him, I just stared. I couldn't hide the want on my face anymore. I could feel my eyes pleading with him to just do it. Just make the move, because I couldn't.
With the luckiest break I've had in a while, he read my thoughts, and dipped his face down to brush our lips together.
This was different. This wasn't hungry. It was a hot burn, slow and steady. His hand came up to brush against my face, pulling me just close enough for him to press his face closer, solidifying the kiss.
Once I had the nerve, I moved my lips against his, my body melting against him. We moved slowly, our tongues only trying to make short appearances to taste the other's lips. His kisses on my lips slowed, his hand running down the side of my body, stopping to rest on my hip. Noah's lips began to trail off of my mouth, moving down to my neck, leaving soft kisses over my throat, making my breathing stop altogether.
I'm not entirely sure how long we stayed this way, his lips leaving trails of warmth over my jaw, neck, and collarbone.
I finally reached for him, my arm searching for the hem of his shirt, slipping underneath. My fingers grazed his skin, feeling the solidity of his frame. I felt him breathe out a sigh when I began leaving kisses on his neck. I let the tip of my tongue trace his adam's apple, smiling when the grip on my hip tightened with a nip of his skin.
After he had been tormented enough, he slipped his arm around my waist, flipping to perch over me, laying me flat on my back.
The kiss that came now was burning, hungry, and wild. My fingers pulled at his shirt, lifting it until he had to sit up and pull it over his head.
He wasted no time coming back to attack my neck, nipping and biting carefully, but enough to have me whimpering. He slid one hand up my side, beneath my shirt, and grazed the side of my breast, waiting for a reaction. I arched my back, trying to beg for touch.
His fingers grabbed my entire breast with one hand, pinching my hard nipple and rolling it between his fingers. I gasped at this.
"Oh, Noah..." I heard him hum, a sign of approval.
My hands grabbed his hair, pulling him back to my face. I kissed him while he used his other hand to lift my shirt, exposing both breasts.
It took no time for him to work his way down, taking my nipple in his mouth, leaving me breathless. His tongue circled the hardened bud, driving me absolutely wild.
I could feel his excitement pressing into the inside of my thigh, so I squirmed, causing a friction I'm sure he noticed. I felt the growl more than heard it.
His hand slid up my thigh, stopping on the inside, just before the hem. I could feel myself shaking in anticipation. He hooked the edge of my shorts, and with no mercy, pulled them down viciously, exposing my plain black cotton panties.
His hand glided over my core, feeling how damp the fabric already was. I was breathing heavily, silently begging for more.
"Jesus Christ, Leena." His mouth reached down and kissed my breast again. "So fucking wet."
His words had my brain scrambling. I hadn't been intimate in so long.
His fingers traced over the wet spot, teasing me until I was sure I was going mad.
"Noah..." His eyes looked up to me, my left nipple glistening from his saliva. "Fucking please."
The smile on his face was so wicked, I swear I saw the devil behind it. And this was my one-way ticket to hell. At least it's warm there.
His fingers slipped under the fabric, running up and down over my slit, nearly hitting that one spot I needed.
"This? This is what you want?" His tone was deadly, which had me reeling even harder. I fucking needed him.
I could only nod wildly. His index finger slipped inside, curling at just the right angle, hitting the sweetest spot, I could've burst right then and there.
"That's it. Good girl." His words had me moaning softly, his fingers working me over. Noah continued this until I was nearly seeing stars, his thumb now rubbing circles over my clit. I was ready, so fucking ready, eyes shut tight, climbing the hill and about to fall over. Then it was gone.
My eyes burst open, nearly ready to complain before I felt his hands pulling my panties down, his hot breath just centimeters from my core.
"I can't tell you how many times I've thought about this, Leena. I'll bet you taste incredible." Breathing was out of the question. Air no longer existed.
And that was it, he was on me. His tongue lapping up my pussy, humming while I gripped his hair frantically.
"Holy fuck, Noah."
"That's it baby. Scream my name. Be good for me."
My brain was no longer firing on any cylinders. I was on another plane altogether.
His lips latched onto my sweet spot and sucked like his life depended on it.
"Noah, oh my god! Oh my god, I'm going to come." My back arched off the couch, and my vision went white.
"Noah, Noah, Noah!" My voice was going hoarse. My toes curled and I began to feel the overstimulation, my hips bucking against him.
His arms pinned my legs down, leaving me nowhere to go. I fought for purchase against his skin.
"Please, please I can't. I can't!" He finally released me, lapping at my inner thigh one more time, causing me to shiver.
He sat back, a satisfied grin on his face.
When I looked up at him, I could see the clear bulge in the sweats, and smiled my own wicked grin.
I saw the confusion on his face before I sat up, simultaneously pushing him back on the couch, ripping the front of the pants down. It came to my attention that he wasn't wearing any boxers, so his cock sprung free instantly.
His eyes were fixed on me while I sized up his length, trying to work out how I was going to swallow this damn thing.
I slid the tip of my tongue across the top, eliciting a hiss from his lips. He stared down at me, watching my every calculated move.
With no warning, I wrapped my lips around him, and took him as far down as my throat would allow.
"Oh, fuck..." His eyes went half-masked, his mouth falling open. "Do that again. Jesus Christ."
It didn't sound like a question, so I diligently obeyed. My throat gave out about halfway down his length, causing me to gag. His hand grabbed my hair, nails in my scalp, holding me there.
"Yeah, baby. That's it." He let my head up, saliva dripping from my lips. "You're so good, Leena. Such a good girl."
His hand pressed me back down gently until I had a good rhythm going, my head bobbing, eyes looking up at him.
"Fuck, girl, I'm not going to last like this." I hollowed my cheeks, increasing the suction, and his eyes bulged.
His head flew back, his chest heaving wildly. "Just like that, baby. Don't stop."
I obeyed, suddenly really enjoying the submissive role. His hand guided me faster until I felt him harden to nearly stone.
"I'm going to come, don't stop...fuck don't fucking stop baby."
I felt the first hot stream hit the back of my throat, and I relaxed, waiting for the rest before sucking just a second longer, listening to him hiss in response. I let him out of my mouth with a pop, smiling at him sheepishly when I sat up.
He laid there, eyes closed, hands on his chest, working to breathe.
It took a while, but he eventually opened his eyes. His smile was lazy, and he lifted an arm to pull me down, now laying on his chest again.
He reached behind me and flung the blanket over us, kicking his pants the rest of the way off, and looked down at me.
"We shouldn't have done that, huh?"
I blushed, nuzzling my nose into his neck to hide it as best as I could. "No, we shouldn't have."
He ran his hand up and down my arm, now turning his attention back to the movie that was still playing.
"We'll do better tomorrow." Was the last I heard before my eyes drifted closed.
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mmorw · 11 months
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Mom!Chae Yul being such a worried mom, promising how good he would be with the role and still being cruelly approached in the despair of motherhood.
Wife!Chae Yul being such a wonderful wife tho, receiving you at home with his usual smile; he loves you too much to put fights in between.
Wife!Chae Yul getting ready from the first moment you found his "little" room in the house where he had pictures of your different office mates marked with big red Xs, only to start crying so disturbingly and intrusively enough that the neighbors threatened to call the police for suspected abuse.
Mom!Chae Yul establishing such a loving and perfect bond with your first baby, thinking that with a baby he would became calmer and not so meticulously into your privacy; just so that in 15 years, you can see a younger version of Chae Yul just as obsessed with their future partner so as Yul was with you.
Mom!Chae Yul creating literally a younger version of himself. Your kid with 15 years old is such as beautiful as how Chae is; with their purple hair and big and perfect eyes, tall and pretty enough for any kind of person to stare at them.
“Bye mom, bye dad!” Your happy and sweet daughter smiled before kissing you and her mother's cheek, approaching to leave quickly with a smile from ear to ear.
“What's up with her?”You ask, looking back at Chae Yul as he hums with happiness, almost giving you a chill down your spine;
“She likes someone.”
Wife!Chae Yul looking pissed at the moment he brings the bento you felt home and see you talking to another girl; a nice woman who saved your ass by letting you copy one of her paperwork for the afternoon.
I know I said he didn't had time to fight with you. but he was furious, the moment what could be seen for the two of you, he threw himself into your arms and nearly threw a tantrum right there. When you got home, things would get ugly yk.
Wife!Chae Yul who loves to bake! he can make cakes, cookies and pies at every moment he can! Baking helps him too much to relax and have his hands on something other than fingering himself.
Of course, with a screen next to him while he sees all your movements at every moment of the day. ♡
Mom!Chae Yul just being a sick source of love to your kid, teaching them sick ways of how to love; even if it cost them their life.
Chae Yul came crying into the room as you pulled his arm brutally, pushing him onto the bed as he sobbed, his face red and eyes slightly swollen from crying.
“Now what the fuck, have you taught our son?”
Chae Yul's cries became louder, his hands pressed against his face as his body trembled; unable to look at you.
“Chae Yul.” You growled, still, Chae was reluctant to say anything; the waterfalls kept falling from his eyes, he looked so submissive and weak that it made you rethink if you really wanted to keep scolding him.
The verbiage you had directed at your son had not been entirely appropriate, not after summoning them to school for the rarely possessive behavior and obsession your son had developed toward who had been his romantic attraction.
You thought it would be child's play, a misunderstanding; but just getting to the house and the way you looked at Chae Yul, in the most disgusted and embarrassed way, you got him crying and trying to pounce on you to get your attention and try to excuse himself.
“I-I'm, hic sorryᅳ ” he stammered before turning his gaze back to you, the way he trembled and immediately held out his arms to you made you bite your lip; you didn't want to fall back into his arms. “darling..”
You gave a long internal sigh before hugging him tightly, feeling the desperation of his hands pressing into your clothes, drawing you closer and closer to him, sobbing as he did his best to want to be a part of you.
You cradled his head for a few seconds, listening to him calm down and stop shaking; Chae Yul snuggled into your body, relaxing into the comfort of being loved again.
you didn't wanted to fall back to his arms, right? but damn, from the moment he faked his pregnancy so you two get married and then become truly pregnant; you knew that with Chae Yul, there would be no escape in like, forever. lol
we love crazy ommas there.
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