#in my personal experience of this

[dinitride-art]

Nancy and Mike (and Robin) - Character Relationship Analysis/Exploration

Nancy and Mike’s relationship has always been really interesting to me. We don’t see Nancy pull away from Mike but we see Mike reacting to Nancy’s absence in his life. He tells their parents about Steve, and takes Nancy’s things, and tries to hold onto their relationship in the only way he knows how to. Because Nancy acknowledges him when he’s annoying her and when she’s angry at him. Or when he’s in danger. That’s it.

Nancy doesn’t play D&D with him anymore. She doesn’t talk to him anymore. Even in season four, the most we see of their relationship is Nancy driving Mike to school. And even though Nancy’s been pushing Mike away, he still goes to her when Eddie tells him and Dustin to find a replacement for Lucas. Mike keeps trying to come into her life, and Nancy keeps pushing him out.

Nancy is constantly trying to find a place in the world. She’s with Steve in season one because she thinks that’s what she’s supposed to do. And she gets good grades and studies and goes to party’s in season two. Even to the detriment of her relationships. However, she doesn’t take any blame for her actions, because of the societal pressure for her and everyone else to conform. Jonathan confronts her about it when they’re trying to find Will and Barb and she’s immediately defensive. She gets back together with Steve and blames Jonathan for not making a move sooner. Barb tells Nancy that she’s making a mistake with Steve, and Nancy tells her to go home.

But Barb dies.

Nancy blames herself for that. She blames herself for a lot of things. But she doesn’t want to understand why she blames herself for these things. Jonathan’s already told her that living married to Steve and conforming to societal expectations is bullshit. And she knows it is. But admitting that she’s hurt people by conforming, and trying to get them to conform, means that she’s hurt more than just herself. She’s hurt Barb. And Jonathan. And she even hurt Steve.

But most of all, she doesn’t want to admit that she’s hurt, and has been hurting, Mike the whole time.

That’s why she doesn’t like Robin at first. Because Robin is very similar to Mike. She’s loud, and impulsive, and says the wrong thing at the wrong time. And she can’t help it in the slightest. It’s not Robin’s fault that Nancys cold to her at first. It’s got nothing to do with Robin. Nancy just doesn’t want to admit that Mike hasn’t done anything wrong either. Because that means she’s wrong. And that means that she’s hurt him.

Mike and Robin both display autistic traits. Honestly, a lot of the characters in Stranger Things do, but these two are the ones with the most on screen brushback against those traits. Everyone has autistic traits, and having autistic traits doesn’t necessarily mean that someone’s autistic but. Considering that this is a writing choice, I think it’s fair to assume, at the very least, that they’re autistic-coded. And the reactions we are told and that we see, like Robin telling Nancy that she doesn’t pick up on social queues easily, and that her mother thinks she’s got something wrong with her. Versus what we see with Mike, people calling him annoying and an asshole and oblivious. Going to Lucas for help with El because he doesn’t understand what he’s supposed to do.

The key difference between Mike and Robin is what we see and what we’re told. Robin always tells us what she’s thinking and feeling and who she is. But with Mike we’re shown what’s happening. Same with them being queer characters, we’re told that Robin likes girls, and we’re shown that Mike likes Will. Robin is a queer character for a heteronormative audience. Mike is a queer character, regardless of the audience’s biases. Robin tells us that she doesn’t pick up on social queues. She explains that to Nancy, and Nancy is confronted with what we’ve seen the entire time with Mike.

Mike doesn’t pick up on social queues either. And Nancy knows this, and she’s seen all of his similarities to Robin as a bad thing. And she’s told him that he’s doing something wrong for being that way.

The reason that Nancy doesn’t like Mike, why she pushes him away, and calls him annoying and an asshole, is because Mike can’t be like her.

He can’t conform in the same way that Nancy does. And she doesn’t understand why he can’t.

Until she meets Robin.

And there’s a neon sign in front of her face that says, “Mike didn’t deserve this. It wasn’t his fault. He’s different, and so is Robin, and you told him that something was wrong with him.”

Nancy hurt him. She pushed him away. Told him in every way possible that his interests, and friends, and personality were wrong. And that she didn’t want a brother who was like that.

And now she knows why. Robin told her why.

Nancy doesn’t hate Mike. She’s scared that she was wrong. That Mike hasn’t really done anything wrong. That it was her fault that their relationship is like this.

And she’s scared.

Because she’s a lot more like Mike than she wants to admit.

[gayvampyr]

no offense but you guys need to learn the difference between someone implying their experience is universal and a post simply just not being about you

[princesskuragina]

My last post was being snarky but here's my genuine pronoun etiquette opinion in case you actually want to know: it's pretty much never a good idea to directly ask someone their pronouns in front of a group of people, especially if you're in a position of authority, i.e. a teacher. The stakes of this question are very high for some people and you are putting them on the spot to decide what they want to share and what is safe to share. If you have decided you want to ask for pronouns at all, you can introduce yourself with your own to remind people that they can share theirs if they want to. And for the love of god whatever you do please do not just single out the most gender non-conforming or "trans looking" (to you) person and ask only them and no one else

[pien-art]

digital painting of my keychain-chain 😌 (close-ups under the cut!)

(click image for better quality)

[transexualpirate]

queer people online: transfag too weird. transbian too problematic. cancel lil nas x

queer people irl: i literally don't have a gender but lesbian sounds cool so that's me now. im bi but im feeling gay today. im not a man and i dress femininely but my pronouns are he/him. i am repulsed by the idea of having sex but i constantly make the best dirty jokes you've ever heard

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

[alfheimr]

the L in law stands for LOVED...its his birthday:)

[panstarry]

my final from last semester that i made into a zine. cooked this one up in a couple hours before the critique (the ink was still wet!), so it's very raw and kind of sloppy but the sentiment is there. i love you trans people of color. we are the backbone of this community 🌟

[nyancrimew]

i think every queer (whether they've realized it already or not) kid should have to go through an emo phase, let's force them to listen to nu-metal while they skip school to cry about a broken heart

[lykoiii]

but it's a necessary evil

[sadisthetic]

the madness frustration loneliness of the dissonance of a mismatch of the rotten heart to the rest

allosexual aromantic swag happy pride *peaces out*

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

At your side [End of Season 2]

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[rejoiceinsilverlight]

thinking about super cousins post-season 2 and potential effects of being exposed to kryptonite so many times

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...

[borderlinereminders]

I think the child in me healed a little bit today.

My partner knew that I didn’t have a great childhood and had a lot of stuff missing. Memories, experiences, etc.

Knowing how sad I was about it, he set up Easter for me. He came to get me because he’d hidden eggs around the house filled with candies or chocolate.

I felt a little silly at first but then I just let go and let myself enjoy it. It makes me feel emotional, in a good way, just thinking back on it.

So, two reminders from this experience of mine for you.

1) It’s okay to indulge your inner child. In fact, you should! It’s okay to enjoy things others might find silly whether it’s swinging on the swings, watching a children’s movie or any number of things.

2) Amazing people exist in this world. And you deserve to have those people and shouldn’t settle for less. Maybe it isn’t about setting up an egg hunt for you but I hope you find someone, if you don’t have someone, who offers you support and care. And I hope they encourage you to be yourself.

[mossycobblestonewrites]

DC X DP PROMPT #15

Despite what most people would think, Danny was an excellent driver. It took a lot of hard work and extra classes, but he is by far the safest driver of the family. So safe in fact that others often make fun of him for it.

'You'll get there eventually with Grandma driving!' 'It's like going even a fraction over the speed limit is gonna give you a heart attack or something'

It was fine. Danny was proud about being a safe driver. It's what he worked for! His family already contributed to enough property damage.

Driving in Gotham was a very different experience from driving in Amity. His new friends made fun of him even more now.

It was one of these playful ribs that he shot out his favorite reply (one he hadn't gotten the chance to use since moving).

"Well, you know what they say; you should only do one illegal thing at a time!" Danny thought he was hilarious (as his species was still technically illegal), the Batkid (you decide) overanalyzed (as usual).