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#it's so much easier omg haha
thomine · 4 months
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the wind must blow the windmills : venti
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pairing: venti / reader info: general audiences, reader is not human, childhood friends (sort of), unrequited love, love confessions, alcohol, marriage proposal, angst, creative liberties with maigc, no beta, canon compliant (ambiguously in canon...)
summary: when you wished to see the human world that he loved so much, he did not hesitate to give you a vessel. when the man approached him at the bar, face red and heart relentless with passion, venti could not say no to a child of mondstadt.
word count: 1.3k words series: day 2 of angstpril / prompt: frozen + jealousy (bonus) links: read on ao3 / work tag
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As citizens of Mondstadt disperse from the town square after a long day of festivities for Windblume, Venti conceals himself behind a pillar. The winds can carry whispers, but even before any words are exchanged, he knows what will happen. A man dressed elegantly with a bouquet of flowers walks up to you—who stands by the statue of Barbatos nervously.
When you wished to see the human world that he loved so much, he did not hesitate to give you a vessel, and at your core you are a wind spirit, but if you keep to Venti’s word, you are as human as you can be. When the man approached him at the bar, face red and heart relentless with passion, Venti could not say no to a child of Mondstadt. The cumulation of his efforts is behind the pillar.
Venti holds his breath and braces himself for the impact.
It is quiet. The deity of winds had instructed it not to report to him the happenings. It will hurt too much when you seek him with questions. As he waits, he plays with his braids, wondering if this moment in time will stretch as endlessly as he feels it might. The confession should be taking place right now—
There is a gleeful scream, and then a mixture of laughter.
Despite being the entity that controls the gales, Venti is not sensitive to the feel of it against his skin. Humans describe it as nature’s kiss. It’s refreshing, especially on a hot summer day. A chilling embrace. This is the first Venti is made aware of its touch. It’s too cold to ignore. It is almost as if Mondstadt is once again plagued with snow and ice.
Or perhaps, that’s just his heart.
Regardless, the wind must blow the windmills in Mondstadt, even if Venti longs for something else.
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“One more bottle, please!” Venti asks while he sits at Angel’s Share. This bottle is more than his current earnings for the day, but he has some savings meant for days like this.
Charles, the bartender, obliges. Before Venti’s thoughts can drift to what happened at the statue of Barbatos, a dark yet shiny bottle of dandelion wine is served, cock unscrewed and the faint smell of fermented grapes indulging him.
However, before he can pour himself a cup and gulp it all down, relishing in the burn down his throat that accompanies a fruity aftertaste—what he enjoys the most—a hand is on his shoulder. It is gentle. It is cold. It does not belong to one who is fully human.
Venti greets you, but he faces forward. You take the seat beside him, twisting your body to look at him expectantly, eyes bright and sparkling with excitement.
“And how was your first ever Windblume?” Venti asks, slowly turning his head. He also adds a little slur in his words for fun. He’s not the type to get drunk easily which he normally considers a strength to brag about, but at this moment he really wishes he wasn’t sober, so at least he can’t comprehend the delight on your face. Seeing it is equivalent to licking ice—your smile sends shivers down his spine, wakes his body with energy, but it also burns. “I told you that this nation is a nation of freedom and romance, didn’t I?”
You nod.
“Your silence is uncanny,” Venti points out, eyeing you from the corner of his eye. “You’re normally much too energetic and talkative. Aren’t you going to tell me about what happened today?”
“I mean… you were at the town plaza too, weren’t you?” you ask, eyes evading Venti’s curious stare by looking down. You’re embarrassed, and it’s cute. He brings his half-filled cup to his mouth, taking a strong whiff of the wine so that he has another reason for his poking smile. “My powers have weakened since I took this vessel, but I can still sense when another elemental being is nearby. You were there, right? Were you behind all this?”
“Why would you ever suspect such a thing?”
“I’ve seen you walk around with him a couple of times,” you explain, and Venti notices how you have one of the smaller flowers from his bouquet pinned onto your attire. In ancient Mondstadt, this was a tradition of proposal during the Windblume. Such beliefs are not practiced, but Venti knows you—the wind spirit who travels to find all sorts of flowers. This is something you’ll appreciate. “Not to mention, why else would you be there than to watch your masterful plan and gloat in its success?”
Well, he was also there for the miniscule possibility you’ll reject this human being’s confession, and Venti will be ready, arms open wide for you to run into his arms and admit that you’ve loved him from the start. Even a god can dream.
“Reasons aside, why are you here with me? Don’t you have somewhere to be, perhaps by the side of your new lover?” He teases as he connects his cup to his lips and take in multiple gulps. Ah. He just loves the taste of wine. If only he had apples too.
“I was wondering why you didn’t stop me, and I thought you might have something to say.”
If he had more courage—perhaps if he was more alcohol than duty—he will say what he wants. How he granted your wish because he hoped to travel the world of humans with you. He was ecstatic when you returned from far lands to greet him after all these years, and he wanted to have you by his side to tell your tales in exchange for his, and to never separate once again.
But the moment you had your own limbs, he did not chase you when you blurred with the citizens. He could not. He was frozen in place by his own ideals.
Your eagerness to have a human vessel should have been a red alarm. Turns out you were enamoured with a human from your travels who so happened to be from Mondstadt, and you returned not for Venti. The winds carried your desires to him one fine day. He knew he should not have heard it. It was for the better if he did not.
How twisted.
“I sure do have poems and ballads to congratulate you, although that would best be saved for your wedding day,” he says instead.
“I’m not talking about that. You know very well what I am. Is it a bad idea to pursue this? Will there be any repercussions for my actions?”
Venti ponders on your question. He has thought about it. In fact, the reason why he came to this bar is so that there can be a comfortable atmosphere for you and him to talk about this. (Or rather, a comfortable atmosphere for him. He drinks another cup of lovely dandelion wine.)
“If you are careful with all I’ve already shared, I believe it should be well. The body is just a vessel, and you’ve accumulated enough energy through your experiences travelling over the years to sustain its lifeforce.”
You sigh, a hand on your heart.
“I can’t thank you enough,” you say, leaning forward with arms open wide. Venti does nothing to stop you from hugging him. It is what he wanted, just under different circumstances. Eventually, he turns his body to give you a proper hug too. Your coldness resonates with something inside him for he too isn’t exactly human, and when he pulls away, he tries to douse that rising feeling in his gut with another swing of alcohol. It’s burning warmth is refreshing.
“Oh, don’t be silly. You can do something in return for tonight.” He calls for Charles who has been dealing with some hooligans that lost to alcohol. “I’ll leave the payment to you?”
Charles comes with another bottle, cock unscrewed and ready to be poured. You gladly fill Venti’s cup while teasing him about his adjustment to human society.
When Venti gives you a big grin, you narrow your eyes, unamused, but there is a glint of fondness in the way your lips tip upwards. It’s what he’ll settle with, so long as you still think about him with affection no matter how small.
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author’s note: this is one that… i have quite a bit to say. i'm not sure if i got it across, but i wanted to explore venti's ideal of freedom ironically giving him no freedom. it's not so much the ideal but also because of his personality where he would want the other to choose without his emotions mixing into the equation? venti is… so everything to me <3
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nonconstories · 3 months
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Someone pissed me off a couple of days ago
So! Below are several links to programs and foundations that promote adult literacy! Hundreds of millions of adults world wide were failed by their education system and now must fend for themselves while trying to read contracts and hospital bills and infographics from the CDC. But they don't have to be alone, and it is never too late to learn!
ProLiteracy: A network of educators, researchers, and advocates which provides research reports, learning materials, and other support to adult education programs. They assist with connecting volunteers to local programs and provide guidance and support to community leaders trying to use their programs' findings to advocate for social and political change.
Adult Literacy League: An adult education program in Central Florida, which aims to provide students with one on one attention to foster growth and confidence. It also offers English Second Language courses and job skills training, and each new student receives a comprehensive assessment to determine the best plan for them.
Saint Vincent and Sarah Fisher Center's Foundational Skills Program: A 100% free adult education program aimed at adults reading below a fifth grade level. It operates year round and is either in person or remote, and they now have a GED testing center that is open to students and the public alike.
Washtenaw Literacy: A free network of trained tutors for adults in Washtenaw County, Michigan.
Adult Learning Program (Las Vegas/Clark County): Free education classes to those lacking a high school diploma, those seeking to learn ESL, and adults who read below an eighth grade level. Also assists in students' search for gainful employment. Nevada got so fucked by COVID and the education/literacy numbers in the South West are grim. Please help these guys.
Hawaii Literacy: In addition to helping adult residents of Hawaii Island learn to read and write AND bridging the education gap in Hawaii's underserved children, they offer computer literacy classes, ESL classes, and a bookmobile. 1 in 6 Hawaiian adults struggle to read and write.
#Not Stories#mutual aid#adult literacy#'uuhhhggg its soooo disappointing when i meet a girl who's like 'yeah omg i luv 2 read'#'and then she only reads booktok trash and grocery store thrillers and manga'#'like come on thats such a turn off :/'#'like aren't you bored??? what about reading The Foundation and War & Peace and Grapes of Wrath where's THAT girl haha'#nobody gives a shit what sort of high school reading list gets your dick stiff! NOBODY!#I'm too busy dealing with the fact that most public education systems hate students of color and anyone with a learning disability#from the very bottom of my very dyslexic heart go fuck yourself#'this chick only read 8 books in twelve months lmfao thats so pathetic'#'i read eight books a MONTH some people really give up after high school'#do you think my great grandfather or his father got to fucking finish high school????#or were they busy getting fucking shot at in germany in two different fucking wars????#thank every god you wanna name that my lunatic mother stopped abusing me long enough to put me through FIVE YEARS OF TUTORING#to get ME literate because that's what it fucking took#I watched more than one kid from my underserved semi rural district drop out at 17 or 16 or 15#because their parents needed a third paycheck or they were gonna lose the goddamn house#10% of my majority black school district graduated FUNCTIONALLY ILLITERATE and not an ounce of it was those kids' fault#our racist ass school district failed them and the district did NOT protect my white ass when I was diagnosed dyslexic#the adult literacy crisis is not about you getting a girlfriend who can discuss Ayn Rand with you#the adult literacy crisis is about us being exploited and neglected and made easier to control and manipulate#reading is FUCKING HARD and learning to read after the age of six is SO MUCH HARDER#so from the VERY very bottom of my VERY very dyslexic heart#FUCK. YOU.
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detective-ws · 10 months
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turned one of my N doodles into a pfp hehe >:3
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suddencolds · 7 months
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i've def heard of people having to be in the right headspace to write like, v thirsty/self-indulgent snz content, but somehow i find it equally difficult to be in the right headspace to write angst
#snz thirst is more predictable bc it's just#letting my d pilot the plane instead of my head and blinking down to see that i've written 2 thousand words#angst is not like a snz-specific device so you'd think it'd be easier to utilize#but specifically in the context of h/c it feels like#close to the same level of self-indulgent for me... only i feel so much more self-conscious when i'm writing it. i think it's also because#i feel like people more easily excuse gratuitous snz as like 'omg the author really went for it 🥵 this is hot' whereas for angst the#equivalent of 'overdoing it' or being too indulgent is like... okay this is ooc. these characters are not arguing in a way that feels#believable. it feels like they are being flattened or misconstrued just for the sake of the angst 🙁#what i'm trying to say is#being perceived as overindulgent in the angst sense scares me so much more than being perceived as overindulgent in the snz sense#when i get really into writing angst i'm like >:) omg i live for dramatic tension and misunderstandings. please argue MORE#but when i get to editing it i'm like 😰😰 what was i thinking. would they really say that... would they really cry here...#which feels terrifying in a different way - the not-knowing if what i've been writing will be received as i intend it or if it'll be seen#as too emotionally trite / unbelievable#does that make sense... i am operating on 4h of sleep right now which is probably#why this post exists haha. but anyways
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takamoris · 13 days
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Don’t fuck with us FFXIV Fans- We don’t even like the game.
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sibelin · 1 year
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of course it's raining the day i am thinking of going to the club. idk idk.
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saederkrupps · 7 months
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i know that internet friendships are just like that and that ppl will be all over you for a few weeks and then they just drop you and you dont hear from them for months and im suppose to be okay with that. but it still sucks feeling like i am being treated like a convinent hyperfixation like an interest they can pick up at any time and i have to be ok with it because this is how the internet has decided friendships should work
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cutielando · 6 months
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goals | o.p.
social media au
synopsis: in which everyone is jealous of your relationship
my masterlist
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liked by landonorris, mclaren and 2,194,572 others
yourusername life lately 🩷 tagged: oscarpiastri
view all 391,724 comments
oscarpiastri ❤️
landonorris why are you doing this?
yourusername doing what?
landonorris making me feel single
yourusername you are single?🤔
landonorris ...not the point😠
logansargeant cute liked by oscarpiastri and yourusername
user1 they are too cute ❤️
nicolepiastri my children ❤️ i miss you guys
yourusername we miss you too, nicole ❤️
oscarpiastri we'll visit soon ❤️
mclaren 🧡 liked by oscarpiastri
lilymhe ❤️❤️❤️
yourusername ❤️
user2 our favorite grid couple ❤️
user3 we love y/n feeding us oscar content during the winter break 🥳🥳
yourusername i got your back 🫶🏻
user3 omg 😭😭
user4 will you come to more races next season? ❤️
yourusername i'm going to do my best to attend them all !! even though Oscar has offered to make me a full-time WAG, i do love my job haha
user4 hahahaha we love Oscar😩
landonorris you're welcome, btw
oscarpiastri for what?
landonorris i took all of these pictures when i was third-wheeling with your asses 😒
yourusername sounds like a you problem
landonorris you always bully me 😔
yourusername sucks to suck
user5 seeing Y/N and Lando bicker like siblings is my favorite thing 😭
user4 fr, they get along so well and i'm sure it's making Oscar's experience more enjoyable and easier because of that
user3 it's amazing to see how much she supports him though
user4 i know, she's been with him for a long time. it’s cute to see how proud she is of him 🥹
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liked by yourusername, nicolepiastri and 1,824,715 others
oscarpiastri back to work, always with me💗 tagged: yourusername
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yourusername always ❤️
oscarpiastri ❤️
landonorris wasn’t i third-wheeling enough during the break?
yourusername you’re the one tagging along
oscarpiastri she has a point 🤷🏻‍♂️
landonorris i like hanging out with you guys :(
yourusername then why are you complaining?
landonorris …i don’t know
nicolepiastri ❤️my beautiful son
oscarpiastri i miss you mum 🧡
nicolepiastri we’ll see you soon ❤️❤️
user1 i dream of having a relationship like their when i grow up 😩😩
user2 their love makes me believe in fairytales 💗💗
user3 how long have they been together?
user2 close to 3 years. they are childhood best friends as far as i know
user3 ooh, thank you. i was just wondering because they seem very happy together ❤️
logansargeant you never pay attention to me when she’s with you😭
oscarpiastri that’s not true
yourusername i’m just too cool 😎
logansargeant i don’t know about that
oscarpiastri watch it😠
yourusername my knight in shining armor 😩💗
alex_albon are you trying to be aesthetic?
yourusername we’re not trying, we already are
oscarpiastri i’m surprised you know what that is
alex_albon haha, funny
user4 forever thankful for these 2 🥲❤️❤️
user5 i want someone to love me like Oscar loves Y/N 😩😩😩🧡🧡🧡
user6 they are goals 🥹🥹🥲
yourusername has added to their story
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seen by 98K
caption: my outfit for today’s race 🧡
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liked by landonorris, mclaren and 1,927,481 others
yourusername proud doesn't even begin to describe how i feel 🧡 tagged: oscarpiastri
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oscarpiastri you were my lucky charm, couldn't have done it without you 🧡
yourusername you're gonna make me cry baby 😭😭😭😭
yourusername i love you so much🩷🩷🩷
oscarpiastri i love you more❤️
landonorris i was on the podium as well :(
yourusername i congratulated you too 🥹
landonorris but why does he get special treatment?
yourusername because he's my boyfriend...?
oscarpiastri watch it, mate
landonorris i was just saying :/
nicolepiastri 🧡🧡🧡🧡 liked by yourusername and oscarpiastri
user1 he did so well for her 😭😭🧡
user2 i want a relationship like theirs 🫶🏻😍
user3 the way he looked at her when he was on the podium >>>
user2 i need someone to look at me like that 😩
user4 girl, same
georgerussell63 well done, mate! well deserved💪🏻
oscarpiastri thanks, george!
logansargeant making the Aussies proud, I see
yourusername he never disappoints
oscarpiastri not when i have you with me
logansargeant why do you always have to flirt in the comments?
yourusername we’re giving the people what they want to see
mclaren proud of you, Oscar! what a stellar weekend! 🧡
yourusername i love you, admin 🥹🧡
mclaren ilyt😉😉
oscarpiastri should i be concerned…?
landonorris they’re taking over. run for your life
yourusername 😒
yourusername you need to step up your game, babe
oscarpiastri are you seriously suggesting i’m losing you to the mclaren admin?
mclaren she’s not suggesting it, it’s already happening
oscarpiastri on it yourusername 🫡
lilymhe you were gorgeous, babe❤️❤️
yourusername i could say the same about you❤️
francisca.cgomes we stole the show
alex_albon ...
pierregasly ...
oscarpiastri ...
yourusername sorry boys
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liked by yourusername, nicolepiastri and 3,018,472 others
oscarpiastri we celebrated in style last night tagged: yourusername
view all 724,019 comments
yourusername yes we did 🥵🥵
oscarpiastri 😘🫶🏻
landonorris you two are disgusting
yourusername no, u
logansargeant i hope you used protection
oscarpiastri mate, wtf
yourusername don’t worry, eagle. we did
oscarpiastri babe, did you have to say it?
yourusername you know i had no choice
mclaren you’re not making our job any easier, y/n - PR
yourusername ooops 🤭
user1 Oscar is wilding man 😭😭
user2 this is the dirtiest post we’re gonna get from him and i’m here for it 💀
oscaaaaahpastry not y/n being scolded by McLaren 💀💀💀😭
lando.norrriiiiizzxxx imagine the PR nightmare she causes behind closed doors we don’t get to see 😭
user3 she’s a menace and i’m here for it 😉😉
user4 we love seeing Oscar being dirty 😩😩
yourusername same
user5 😭😭
user6 she is so unhinged and i love it 😭😭
landonorris atta boy
mclaren Lando, please, don’t make it worse 😭
oscarpiastri 🫢🤭
yourusername we’re sorry, McLaren admin :(
mclaren no, you’re not
yourusername no, we’re not
oscarpiastri we’re really not
maxverstappen1 these photos aren’t doing the night any justice…
yourusername 🤭
oscarpiastri you weren’t any better, shut up
maxverstappen1 🤐
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lowkeyrobin · 15 days
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still so disappointed that mr pennycrumb [fives dog in the comics] didnt rlly appear much in the show </3
ok ok so its the academy's birthday and the reader is insanely good at gift giving and never forgets to give presents if theres smth special happening. they hand out the gifts to everyone except they avoid five and disappear w/o them knowing where they went, only to come back at dusk w/ a larger box. obviously five went insane and rambles on how worried he was before the reader finally shuts him up by plopping the box on him, and boom. theres a puppy.
[loved the last viktor fic btw. literally bawled my eyes out]
- 🦇
OMG YES the only appearance we saw was in s3 when Luther went on a jog before he got napped :( ; and thank you!! I got bored and I couldn't extend it any further so it's kinda dumb but it's alr haha ; thanks for requesting, hope you enjoy! ; also sorry this is so short and dumb idk writers block is so picky
FIVE HARGREEVES ; mr pennycrumb
summary ; when the umbrella academys birthdays roll around, you get five a whole ass dog
warnings ; language
disclaimers ; some of the gifts are related to hobbies/interests that are more of hcs than actual canon
word count ; 738
masterlist
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When you walked into Allison's with multiple boxes and bags for the Hargreeves, they all knew you were at it again with your insane yet accurate gift giving. They started with cake, then moved over to presents.
Gift giving in the family was like secret Santa in a way. Everyone would essentially get gifts for all the others, and they'd pass around gifts one by one, usually by number order. Luther was always first, Viktor always last. Lila usually snuck in around Diego, because duh. Viktor had gotten used to being last, the forgotten one. But around his family now, he knew it wasn't like that anymore. He'd rather go last so everyone else could have their special time on their special day.
So, the group sets the gifts tagged for Luther on the table in front of him. The kids halfway watch from afar, paying attention to the TV and their toys more than their celebrating parents, aunts, and uncles.
You were among the minority in the house that didn't share a birthday with them, thank God. You would've gone insane over big birthdays like this.
Five, meanwhile, was going insane over you basically ignoring him all day.
You'd gotten Luther some workout gear, knowing he'd taken up going to the gym within the past couple of years. Among other gifts were little trinkets and other things he wanted. He was a little hard to shop for, never really wanting anything, enjoying the quality time over any gift giving.
Next was Diego, and inside the gift you got for him, was a knife sharpening kit. He'd lost his old one just in time. Lila came up next, receiving a few nice outfits you found for her and a gift card to Cosmoprof, as she'd been thinking about re-dyeing her hair to white again.
Next up was Allison, grateful for the numerous acting job business cards you'd given her on top of a bunch of books that were on her Amazon wishlist. She was a serious reader who wanted to get back into acting, now.
Klaus was after her, ecstatic about a carry-around cleaning kit. You were going to go with a joint maker to make his life easier before he got sober. Now he wouldn't need a full bag of cleaning supplies, he'd have your perfect gift.
Five decided to go last, wanting to watch his family be happy more than open presents himself.
Ben was next, receiving some letters from modeling agencies. As he should.
Viktor was second to last, very appreciative for the new drink recipes you'd made and found for him atop the pile of clothes you'd gotten him.
You disappeared around dusk, leaving Five to open his presents without presence. He was physically eighteen, mentally sixty-two today.
As he looks up, seeing the lack of you around, he hides a soft frown. He noticed how you weren't standing near him all night, how you barely even spoke around him.
"Did you do something to Y/n?" Klaus asks out of the blue. "They just kinda... dissappeared"
Five shrugs. "I don't think I did. Even if I did do something, they'd talk it out with me"
Allison shrugs. "I think that's them" she comments, looking out the screen door to see you pull up in your car again. "Diego, could you get the door?"
Diego turns around, unlocking the door for you, holding it open as he sees you holding a big box.
"Why is that box bigger than you?"
"Also, why is it moving?"
You set the box on the table in front of Five, a wide smile on your face. "Open it"
He slowly sets aside the large box of coffee pods he received from Diego to the side, slowly reaching for the box flaps. As he pulls them to the side, out jumps a little dog.
"Oh my God?"
Five smiles, pulling the puppy into his lap. He looks up at you, a glimmer in his eyes. "Why did you get me a dog?"
You shrug, moving the box off the table. "You're a lonely old man, you need some company"
He chuckles, petting the pug's head.
"What're you gonna name it?" Ben asks, arms crossed.
"Him" You correct
"Mr. Pennycrumb" Five answers.
"Why?" Luther asks.
The physically younger boy shrugs. "Why not?"
"Interesting choice" Klaus mutters with a shrug.
Five smiles up at you, giddy like a little kid. "Thank you"
"I try"
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koolades-world · 8 months
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omg no bc whoever requested the getting talked over thats me fr it happens so often 😭😭 but id like to add onto that and request smthng that happens to me a lot
imagine the brothers with an mc that feels like theyre an npc? i know this is a bad way of saying it but i dont know how else to describe it. what i mean is when it seems like none of your peers or friends really like you because when you talk, people reapond dryly or just straight up dont say anything or even act like they heard you and you have to repeat yourself multiple times just to be noticed and you just feel like the most forgettable person of the group
if you dont wanna write this like super specific prompt i get it no pressure
have a nice day :3
hello!! so glad you enjoyed the other thing I wrote that much that you requested an extension(? is that the right word???)! I just hope I don't repeat myself haha
super specific requests are my bread and butter honestly! helps me get a better idea of what you want and there hasn't been something I can't do yet
hope you enjoy <3
Mc who's treated like an NPC by others
Lucifer
at first, he's kind of part of the problem
the exchange program is just a chore to him, so he finds it easier to brush over things you say
but once he grows closer to you, he feels guilty for all the times he ever ignored you or made you repeat yourself
because of this, he finds himself hanging onto every word you say, and makes all those around him go silent when you're speaking
Mammon
he's another one who also doesn't take you that seriously at first
after he gets to know you, he acts as your voice for you if others refuse to listen
he refuses to let others trample you like that
he apologizes to you for them and eventually makes everyone forgive you themselves
Levi
he feels like he's in the same boat and relates to some level
sometimes, he also feels like he's forgotten by everyone but he also feels sometimes he's part of the problem
when he's in his own gaming world, everything is background noise to him
if someone else does it to you, he works up the courage to comfort you and give you his best listening ear
Satan
he gets mad on your behalf and won't hesitate to correct everyone around you both
he refuses to let someone he cares so deeply for be treated like they don't exist
quick to snap and respond like a smartass but be so sweet to you in the same moment
wants to make you realize that you're not forgettable to him
Asmo
he liked you from the very beginning and disliked the way others let you blend into the background
the first time it happened, he politely cleared his throat and let you continue
the second time it happened, he was much less polite
refuses to let others respond dryly and ensures their conversation with you is genuine
Beel
has always been more on the quiet side and kept to himself so he didn't notice until you formed a real bond
if he notices someone mistreating you, he inserts himself into your conversation and forces the other person to be nicer
he wants to make sure that you know that he’s always paying attention to you, so his eyes are always on you
feels guilty even though it’s not something he can control so he often apologizes leading to many cute moments together
Belphie
has a 6th sense that activates when someone is pretending you’re not there and such
if he’s present, even if he’s asleep, he turns to them on a dime and stares them down until they realize what he wants. he will wait as long as he needs
if he’s not present, he’ll be paying them a visit in their sleep!
you notice his demeanor change when it happens, and he gets noticeable sweeter <3 expect gifts and kisses
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liliewrites · 4 months
Note
Wouldn't mind requests she says.. hm then how about a soft smut for arlecchino ? I do love the way you wrote her and I'm a sucker for her being so in love with her s/o lol. Perhaps she saw you play with the children or help them with something and was overcome with the affection
Other than that I did mean to ask, are you excited for Wuthering Waves ? Some of these characters are kinda... 😳😳😳 Yinlin especially frfr
Oh and do you accept emoji anons ? Might be a bit easier lol, if you do could I have 🔥 ?
Have a lovely day :)
OMGGG HIII MY FIRST EMOJI ANON? HIIII 🔥 ANONN!!!:OO anyway, regarding WuWa, i have seen stuff about it but not really much updated about it since i've been busy but i do know that it's coming out tomorrow? iirc. but yea fear not for i WILL be playing it, BUT YEAAA yinlin omg and baizhi?? ughajshd who knows i might write about them too.. anyw enjoy anon!!!
-warning/s : NSFW, cunnilingus (r! receiving), tooth rotting fluff, super soft arlecchino, not proofread.
(men and minor dni utc!)
imo.. arlecchino is a person who genuinely loves and cares but prefers not to show emotion especially due to her profession and background (childhood too). she does not like being vulnerable at all and has trust issues with everyone, even the kids as they r still capable of betrayal, but she trusts you 100% with her vulnerability and what she sees as her "weaknesses" which is why she is more showy of her love and care towards you, hence why she is a lovesick fool for her s/o in my eyes hwjasdh sorry for yapping anyw here's ur fic that was supposed to be just a thirst.. haha.. this was also rushed and not proof-read so sorry for d mistakes.. HAHAHA (will elaborate about this behavior of hers in future fics..)
"f-father, may i have a moment?"
small hands tug on the harbinger's coat, and her deadpan eyes meet with those that belonged to a nervous toddler-- one of her children, to be specific. "what is it, my child?" she asked, tone devoid of any feeling, making it hard to guess what she was thinking, much to the child's anxiety of getting scolded by her.
"a-a.. a bouquet for you, father!"
frail little hands open up in front of her, a messy bundle of assorted wild flowers tied together with a sloppy ribbon had been presented to the knave. with a hum, the harbinger accepts the bouquet from the toddler's hands, gives her a pat on the head and the little darling scurries off.
her eyes follow the direction of where the child was headed to, the harbinger's curiosity was piqued and she wanted to know what had motivated the child to bring her flowers out of nowhere without any special occasion.
-- but as soon as she sees as to who the child runs to, she immediately has a clear answer to her question. of course, it was you, it was you who encouraged the child to give her flowers. with silent steps, she approached the slightly ajar of the bedroom's door, leaning on the wall next to it to hear your conversations with the child.
"ah, little love, have you given your father the bouquet you made?"
"y-yes mother! she even gave me a headpat.."
"hmm, now you see, my love? father is not scary at all, father can be strict with you, but it is only out of concern.. sharing is caring, little love, i am sure she'll appreciate a few flowers from time to time. now settle down, it is time for bed."
arlecchino stared at the "bouquet" in her hands, suddenly, it had more meaning to her than just a bunch of wild flowers. it was evidence of the child learning to give, and of course you were the one who taught them that. it was evidence of the child learning that they could be safe around her despite her outward appearance, and of course you were the one who assured them that. she was scary to most children, yes, for she had nurtured and raised them under the guise of a strict and unfeeling father just so she could raise them with proper discipline. although recently, even the younger kids, they have started to treat her more.. genuinely. ah, it must have been your doing. you must have been convincing them behind the scenes. she should hate you, for coaxing the kids in indulging with personal emotions that could cause them to have flaws as they grow up, but she doesn't. instead, she is thankful, because you've treated the kids with such gentleness and unconditional love-- she is thankful that you've treated her the same.
"oh! my beloved, have.. you been standing there all this time?"
a surprised gasp brings her back to her senses, the sound of the door closing behind her lover's back echoed through the hallway of the orphanage. "no, darling. i was simply checking up on you and the children, are they asleep?" arlecchino asks, choosing not to reveal to her wife that she had found out about your recent teachings. "yes, all tucked and away to dreamland." you smiled at her, walking up to her and pulling her in for a hug. the knave was not one for affection, that was made clear, but after a busy day- she cannot help but miss you too. "let's go to bed, my love. i wish to cradle you by my side tonight." you whisper to her ear, and arlecchino silently nods, her hand on your lower back.
as soon as you return to your bedroom with arlecchino, dressed in bed time clothes, the harbiner seemed to have other plans however as she immediately starts to pepper you with slow, soft and sensual kisses.
"my love, ah- you're.. strangely affectionate today, not that i don't like it, is there something on your mind?" you ask with that same gentle tone of yours, the same tone that reduces her to a lovesick fool whenever it's just you two, that lets her put down the wall she's built to let you in and show you what's inside her mind.
"nothing, my beloved.." she whispers, looking at you with adoration. it makes your heart skip a beat to see her like this. she leans in to kiss your forehead, a silent thank you for taking care of the kids.
".. i just simply wish to express my feelings. isn't that what you teach within this household?"
she adds, which confuses you a little. you were unsure about what she exactly meant, but you let her regardless. "okay, my beloved. express your feelings then." you mumbled with a silly smile, finding arlecchino's actions a bit adorable- quite similar to the children, even. arlecchino nods, a look of determination paints her face for a moment, then she leans in to kiss your cheek.
a silent thank you for loving her and seeing through her harsh demeanor. you can't help but feel flustered, feeling like a teenage girl and her first love.
she then moves on to kiss your neck in a ticklish manner, making you giggle, and it was music to her ears.
a silent thank you for introducing genuine warmth to the house of hearth. thanks to you, the orphanage burned with compassion and not with competitiveness. "beloved, aha- s-stop it!" you squirm with a chuckle, and arlecchino's face may not show it, but her heart is leaping at the sight of your gorgeous smile.
a kiss to your chest, making you gasp as her lips landed on your nipples. her tongue swirling gently around it, making you feel a subtle warmth from the intimacy of the moment.
a silent thank you for being a source of healing to her. before you, the word "mother" had brought chills up her spine, and she resented the word fiercely but after you? you had shown her what a real mother was like, and it's one of the many qualities you hold that she absolutely adores about you.
"mhm.. my beloved, is it gratitude that you wish to express?"
you asked, followed by a quiet moan as she releases your chest from her mouth with a pop. she was in awe of you, that you were able to read her mind without having to tell you. ".. yes, my beloved. how did you know?" she curiously asked, and you couldn't help but let out another chuckle. oh, this side of arlecchino was endearing, to see her openly express her thoughts. "you like to show your gratitude towards me in the form of kisses, arlecchino." you answered, bringing your hand to her head to pull her closer, then leaning in to kiss her forehead as well. "- but this is certainly the most intimate way you've shown it." you added, and she definitely felt a bit flustered. either way, arlecchino does not say a word, and chooses to continue expressing her emotions through actions.
her kisses go lower, and lower, and the sensitivity that you feel from increases.
silence rings throughout the room, except for your moans off the walls. her gratitude and devotion to you was as clear as day. her hands gently held you down by the hips as she pulled down your panties with her teeth. it was fucking hot, to see her hold you completely still with her strength alone-- and the eye contact that she kept as she stripped your pussy bare.
"my beloved, do i have permission?"
"of course, my love."
arlecchino knows that asking consent, despite it being already established beforehand, was a major turn on for you. she started by light kitten licks to your clit, making you gasp with each time her tongue made contact with the sensitive bud. the quick and light flicks were a tease, and made you tremble in anticipation.
"the mother of my children, what a pretty pussy you have.."
she mumbles in pure adoration, her breath lightly grazing against your exposed slit. you couldn't help but let out a shaky gasp of her name, "a-arlecchino.. please, do something.." you begged. "patience, my beloved." she answers, but dives right in between your legs to give your slit one, long, lick. it drove you crazy, but it felt so good. she slid her hands under your knees, bringing you closer to her, before holding onto your thighs to keep you spread apart.
"mm, you taste so splendid on my tongue, beloved.."
she moans, before finally indulging both you and her with the pleasure of her tongue roaming, exploring and pleasing your pussy. you started to squirm with the increasing intensity of her licks, and soon she was eating you out like a starved madman. thank god for strong hands, as you could barely keep yourself still, if it weren't for her holding you down you would have kept lifting yourself off the bed.
"a-arlecchino- arle-!"
you cried out her name, as her tounge darted inside you. you were close. so close. arlecchino however, was currently drunk on your moans and the taste of your slick, too busy savoring the raw taste of you, her lover. she hadn't noticed the way your cries were getting louder, or how tighter your grip on her head was becoming-- so she was surprised when you suddenly closed your thighs around her head, a bit of your fluids landing on her lips and tongue, accompanied with a loud cry of her name. she spread your legs apart once more and kept it open through the whole duration of your orgasm, wanting to see how your pussy throbbed and dripped, wanting to admire how pretty you were when you came undone because of her actions.
after you've settled down, she immediately joins you for a cuddle, she was not finished for the night- no, but she'd grant you a short moment of respite. she lays her head on your chest, closing her eyes as she listens to your heartbeat. "my love, i am still surprised how you've managed to notice my way of showing gratitude when i haven't realized it myself.", she mentions. you smiled at that, and looked at her. "to be known is to be loved. i love you, peruere."
she opens her mouth to speak, wanting to further inquire what you meant by that, but closes her mouth as she realizes what you meant once you call her peruere, the name that she hid away as it represents her past, her most fragile self, that only you've come to know instead of arlecchino, the name that spreads far and wide, which strikes fear and conquers respect from the hearts of many.
she nods in agreement, wrapping her arm around you tighter. her heart swelling from the feeling of loving and being loved, of knowing and being known. to be recognized. to be appreciated.
"i agree, my beloved. i am thankful that you've come to know me as who i really am, and stayed to love me despite what i've come to be. i love you too."
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lee-laurent · 3 months
Text
Scheiße - Luke Hughes
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Summary: In which Luke falls for Nico's friend despite the language barrier. Or in which Sofia dates an American boy even though she barely understands him... at first.
Content: fluff, a tiny bit of angst (sort of), implied sex but no smut, making out
also this fic is formatted a bit different! it's kinda like a timeline of Luke and Sofia's relationship!
notes: everything in italics is in swiss german. easier than having to translate everything!! this one is for all my other multilingual queens/kings :) i tried my best to represent the struggle that i felt trying to learn english, but obviously everyone's experience is going to be different. the squirrel scene is very much taken from an actual experience i had haha
Meeting
"Stop picking at your nails, Sof. Everyone is going to love you," Nico attempted to calm his best friend.
"You don't know that. They could hate me," she argued, continuing to pick at her cuticles.
"Well... I'm their captain. So, if they do anything that makes you upset..."
"Don't threaten your team for me, Neeks."
"Just trying to reassure you, love."
The Devils were having a little pre-season get together with all the players and their significant others. Nico's best friend, Sofia, had recently made the move to America in hopes to improve her English; so, naturally he had decided to bring her along to help her make some friends in New Jersey.
Nervously, she followed behind Nico as they walked onto the roof of Nicole and Jesper's building. He placed a comforting hand on her back, leading her towards a group of WAGs.
"Nico! Hi!" Nicole smiled, "And you must be Sofia! Nico talks about you all the time."
"Hi," Sofia smiled sheepishly, playing with the hem of her skirt.
"Would you like a drink?" the blonde asked.
"Oh, sure. Thank you."
"I'll be with the boys. Let me know if you need anything," Nico smiled, walking off towards a group of hollering men.
Sofia fell into a steady flow of conversation with the Devils' significant others. Well, as steady as it could be with her limited knowledge of English.
"How long have you been seeing Nico?" one of the girls asked, taking a sip from her cocktail.
Sofia choked on her drink, giggling at the idea of being with Nico. "He is my best friend. We are not toether."
"Omg! I'm so sorry," the other girl blushed.
"It is fine! No stress," Sof smiled proudly at the use of the expression that Nico had recently taught her.
"So, anyone special back in Switzerland?" Nicole questioned.
"Oh, um, no. I... too focused on work. No time," she explained.
"Omg! We could set you up with one of the single guys on the team!"
"Oh... it's okay," Sofia giggled, taking a long sip of her drink.
"Let us know if you change your mind," Nicole winked, before starting a story about something that had happened at work earlier in the week.
"Sofia! Come here!" Nico beckoned her over to where he stood with a few players.
"Coming! It was nice meeting you all," she smiled politely at the girls.
"Wait! Give me your number! I'll add you to our group chat," Simon's girlfriend exclaimed. Sofia was giddy as she typed her number into her newly found friend's phone.
"Guys, meet Sofia," Nico smiled, placing his hand on her back once again. "Sof, meet Luke, Jack, Timo, and Dawson."
"Hi," Jack smiled widely.
"Nico always talks of you guys. Nice to meet you," the girl smiled, scooting closer into Nico's side. She was not a fan of all the eyes on her at the moment.
"Nice to see you again," Timo grinned. They'd met over the summer when Nico was training.
Luke could see her shoulders untense at the sound of her native language.
"You as well. It's crazy to meet everyone Nico talks about all the time. Like, sometimes I was convinced they were all in his head," she giggled, earning a glare from her best friend.
Luke, Jack, and Dawson chuckled awkwardly, completely unaware of what the conversation in front of them was about. They could be shit talking for all they knew.
"So... what do you do for work?" Dawson asked.
"Oh, fashion photography!"
"Ever tried sports photography?"
"I'm not as good at it," she nodded.
"She's being humble. She just prefers fashion," Nico laughed. While Nico talked to the boys, Sofia couldn't help but notice that the tallest boy in the group had yet to speak to her. Did he not like her? She was trying her best. She caught his eyes for a moment, but he quickly looked down at the beer in his hands. She was upset that one of Nico's close friends didn't like her, but she couldn't win them all.
Crushing
It was the third or fourth time that Sofia had hungout with the WAGs. This time she'd invited them to have their wine night at her and Nico's apartment. The girls were sat in the living room, chatting animatedly about the upcoming season.
"I know that Simon is so excited for his rookie season! He told me that Luke is feeling the same way," Simon's girlfriend smiled.
"I- I don't think Luke likes me," Sofia spoke up, swishing her wine around in the glass.
"What?!" Nicole exclaimed, "Why do you think that?"
"He never talks to me. And when I go to stand with Neeks, he walks away."
"That's funny because Curtis told me something completely different," Reanne smiled cheekily.
"What did he say?" Sofia asked, chugging the rest of her wine, before pouring herself some more.
"That Luke has a biiiiiig crush on a certain someone."
"Ooo! Sofia!" the girls cheered.
"But... he doesn't talk to me."
"Luke has no play, girl. He's probably just wayyy too nervous to talk you cause you're so stunning."
"He thinks I'm cute?" Sofia blushed.
"Duh! Who wouldn't? Do you think he's cute?" Nicole pressed.
Sofia pressed her lips together in an attempt to hide her growing smile, "He is like... how do I say it? My..."
"Type?"
"Yes! He's my type."
"Can I tell Curtis? Maybe he can talk some sense into Luke."
"We should let them come together naturally, Reanne," Nicole giggled.
"Okay, well... next game you're talking to him. Sound good?"
Sofia nodded happily. She couldn't believe that Luke had a crush on her! She felt like a high schooler writing in her diary about the cute boy in her class.
First Date
Sofia stood in the bathroom mirror, fixing her hair for the 15th time. She hadn't gone on a date in over a year and she was shitting herself. Luke had asked her out after their most recent win against the Rangers. She hadn't exactly told Nico who were date was with, but he knew she was going on one.
"You look beautiful, Sof," Nico smiled as she walked into the kitchen.
"It's not too much?" she asked, pulling at the bottom of her top.
"Are you going to wear a jacket?"
"Yeah, my jean one."
"I think that's perfect. Where are you guys going?"
"Some pizza place. Then we're going on a walk, I think."
"Cute. How'd you meet?"
"Oh, at the Rangers game. He came up to me when I was waiting for you."
"He wasn't a Rangers fan... was he?"
"No," she giggled, "He was wearing a Devils' jersery."
"Good. Have fun! You'll be back tonight?"
"Yes, Neeks. I'm not going to his on the first date," she giggled, pressing a kiss to his cheek.
"Stay safe! I love you!"
"Love you too," she grabbed her purse, blowing him one last kiss before disappearing out the door.
"Hi," Luke smiled, "I like your outfit."
"Thank you, Luke. You look nice too," she admired the way his chest looked in the blue polo shirt he was wearing.
"Pizza?"
"Pizza."
The walk to the pizza place was full of laughter. Sofia wasn't sure she'd ever felt so confident in her English as when she was around Luke. He wasn't condescending at all, helping her when she asked and waiting when she didn't.
"Have you ever played hockey?" Luke asked, cutting himself a slice of pizza.
"No. That is not really... my thing?"
Luke nodded in understanding.
"But I love watching. You are very good."
"Thanks, Sofia. I have seen the outfits you've helped Nico make. Do you think you could help me?"
"You always wear same two suits," she giggled, covering her mouth.
"Don't bully me!"
"Sorry. I would love to help you, Luke."
"I, uh, wanted to apologize for ignoring you when we first met. I was under the impression that you were with Nico, so I was trying to push my attraction away."
"Nico is like a brother. I never think of him other ways. Promise."
"It's fine, Sof. No worries. I just being dumb."
"Maybe you are always dumb, Lukey."
Luke cackled, reaching out and holding her hand across the table.
"I'll just pretend that was your lack of English and not you bullying my again."
"I would never bully you," she smirked.
First Kiss
Sofia was cuddled up into Luke's side on the sofa, his hand holding tightly onto the dip of her waist.
"I can put the German captions on," Luke offered, as he watched Sofia's face scrunch up for umpteenth time.
"But maybe that would distract you."
"It won't, babe. I'll turn them on."
Sofia blushed at the pet name. Luke grabbed the remote, clicking on the German caption option on the film they were watching.
"What the hell is Eichhörnchen?" Luke asked, butchering the pronunciation.
"Eichhörnchen?" she giggled, correcting him, "It's squirrel."
"Say that again?"
"Squirrel."
"You say it so funny. I'm sorry."
"The 'skw' sound... that is not in German. Stop hating."
"Sorry, love," Luke giggled, pressing a kiss to the top of her head.
Sofia looked up at him as he pulled away. She placed a gentle hand on the side of his face, leading him back down.
"What're you doing?" he whispered.
"Can we kiss?"
"Wha- what?"
"Can we kiss?" she asked just as confidently as before.
Luke nodded, running his tongue over his bottom lip. He leaned forward, capturing her top lip between his. He smiled into the kiss, ultimately breaking it. Sofia pouted, pulling him back in for more.
Wearing His Jersey/Becoming His Girlfriend
"Do a spin for me?" Luke smiled from his spot on his bed. Sofia was dressed in her panties and a jersey with 'Hughes 43' plastered on the back. She spun around giggling as he got off the bed, picking her up.
"You. Are. So. Fucking. Beautiful," he said between kisses, hands sneaking under the jersey to give her exposed ass a small squeeze. She gasped, smacking his chest.
"Jack will be home soon, I should go."
"Do you have to?" he whined, sitting down and pulling her onto his lap.
"Yes, Lukey. I'll be at the game, wearing my new jersey," she giggled, pulling him into a passionate kiss. He attempted to lay down and bring her with him, but she was quick to stand up. She walked over to the side of the bed, hopping into her jeans. The vintage bell bottoms looked amazing on her and Luke made sure to let her know, letting out a low whistle as she walked out the door.
"A Hughes' jersey?" Nico questioned after the game, pulling her into a hug.
"Thought I'd switch it up. Can't always be repping the Hischier one."
"Where'd you get it?"
"Luke let me borrow it."
"I'm glad you two have become friends. I was worrying you weren't going to befriend any of the guys."
"We're the same age. It just made sense," she shrugged.
"You never told me how that date you went on was."
"Oh, didn't really work out. He just wanted to use me to get free tickets," she lied.
"Sounds about right. You'll find someone, Sof. Don't worry."
"And if I don't?"
"You've got me," he winked, making her laugh. "Need a ride home?"
"Yes! Let me say thanks to Luke again."
"I'll meet you at the car," he smiled, kissing her cheek as he headed out.
"Look at you," Luke whispered as he pulled her into a 'friendly' hug. "Look so good in my jersey."
"Stop being so horny," she giggled, pulling away from him.
"Can't help it when my girlfriend looks sooooo fine."
"Girlfriend?"
"Sorry, I- uh, I just assumed because we spend all this time together. But if you don't want to be my girlfriend, I understand. I shouldn't have-"
"Luke."
"Yeah?"
"I'd love to be your girlfriend."
"Oh."
She pulled him into one more quick hug, before skipping off to meet Nico.
Nico Finding Out
Luke hummed as Sofia straddled his lap, running her hands through his hair. He pressed a kiss to her jaw, another on her neck, then one on her collarbone before connecting their lips again.
"I missed you," he mumbled.
"Missed you too."
The boys had been on a week long roadie, and now Sofia and Luke couldn't keep their hands off each other.
"Mmm, I love this perfume. Is it new?" he asked, kissing her neck again.
"Yeah," her voice was shaky, gasping when he nipped at her jaw.
"God, Sofia. You're perfect."
"Luke."
"Hm?"
"Kiss me."
His hands gripped her waist as their lips met in another passionate kiss. They laid down on the couch, Luke holding himself up as his girlfriend giggled below him.
"What's so funny?"
"Nothing. I just missed this."
"Me too, babe."
Sofia's hands moved under his top, feeling the smooth skin of his chest. Just as Luke was going to ask if he could do the same, a new voice echoed through the apartment.
"Sofia? Who's here?"
"What?"
"Who's here? There's some white sneakers at the door. Not mine."
"Oh, Luke's here! We're watching TV."
The couple scrambled to sit up and fix their dishevled looks.
"Hey, Luke! How's it going, man?" Nico entered the living room, dapping up his teammate.
"Good, good. How're you?"
"Good. You didn't tell me he was coming over," Nico turned to his roommate.
"Yeah... spur of the moment."
"Is that a hickey?" Nico asked in German, as not to embarass Sofia.
"What? No."
"It totally is! Who gave you a hickey?"
"It's not a hickey, Nico."
"Was it him?!" Nico gasped.
"What?! No!"
"It was! You're such a shit liar! How long?"
"Beginning of the season," she sighed, finally giving in.
"This is so funny! Why didn't you tell me?!"
"I'm not a shit liar, for the record. You had no idea until now."
"Was that date with him?!"
"Nico!"
"I'm right here... if you're talking about me," Luke scratched the back of his neck.
"One second, Luke," Sofia smiled. "It was, yeah. I... I was nervous to tell you. Was worried you'd think I was using you to get with him."
"That's funny, Sof. I couldn't care less. As long as you're happy."
Sofia stood up, pulling her best friend into a tight hug.
"I'm watching you though, Rusty. Hurt her and I'll hurt you," Nico threatened, heading to his bedroom.
"He knows?!" Luke gasped.
Guess Sofia had some explaining to do.
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erinwantstowrite · 3 months
Note
Let me just quickly say, cross-overs can sometimes get REALLY difficult to map out and write in a cohesive way but you have absolutely NAILED IT!! I absolutely ADORE LoF!!! I usually don’t even bother reading fics with the ‘Richard Grayson is Richard Parker’ premise cause I felt like they were super confusing and overcomplicated but this fic?? SUPERB. ABSOLUTELY INCREDIBLE. OH MY GOD I ADORE IT. Everyone’s characterizations are so nice and wonderful aaaaaaah!!!! <33333
Ok ok I did actually have a question as well: would you be willing to share what your writing process looks like in terms of a chapter you’ve already posted? I was just wondering since I’m also currently working on my own fic (it’s been a few years but I managed to get fixated on an idea and it grew legs lol) and I’m currently fighting the organization of it haha.
How do you keep track of the plot points and/or foreshadowing you want to get a ‘lightbulb!’ moment for later? Do you have any tips?
Thank you so much! I absolutely adore your writing AND your art is so gorgeous omg it adds so much to the incredible story :DDD I hope you have a good day!!
I have a secret: I actually didn't like "Richard Grayson is Richard Parker' tag for a while for the same reason. Sometimes they felt like they missed the mark or it's just. A thing that's there? I almost didn't include it for LoF, but I'm glad I did because it changed the direction in such a big way.
Another secret: this made me incredibly happy because I have read so many wikis and scoured the internet to make sure that I had enough info on both fandoms so LoF could make sense to anyone who's reading it, whether they know Spider-Man, Batfam, or neither at all. Sometimes I worry a lot before I post that I'll miss a mark and will confuse people.
As for the question: I definitely am willing to share what my writing process looks like!
Be prepared for under the cut, I love to yap. It's in my blood to yap. And that's why it took a minute to get to this ask haha
(Spoilers for Leap of Faith!! Everything mentioned has already been published ((Chapters 1-11))
I had to go and find out which chapter I wanted to use as an example and I think we're gonna go with Chapter 5 for the most part :)
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My writing process is, as described by alighterwood:
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I think the description fits because while I'm all over the place, I have to be very detail oriented and I store everything in one spot.
Starting with the overall process, what I find is most helpful for me, when organizing, is having a notebook rather than doing it all digitally. I've been using a 70 sheet notebook that I had lying around waiting to be used, and as of yesterday, I officially filled the entire thing front to back. It's been an incredible help, for a lot of reasons, but mostly because it's a lot easier to remember something I physically wrote down than it is to remember something I typed. I'm now on to my second notebook for LoF, and I might even have to get a third.
In another ask, startupkat asked me this:
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And I shared a little about my outline process there, but I'll try to go into a little more depth here. Emphasis on little because this is so long.
I write a truly insane amount of outlines in this notebook.
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This is just what I can show you, but a good chunk of the notebook is just outlines. Over and over and over again. That's because they're always changing/adapting based on so many different factors. Sometimes I get to a chapter I thought I had fully planned out and then realize it just doesn't work anymore. Other times, I get to the chapter and realize I don't want to write that anymore/isn't as interesting as I thought it would be. A few times I got halfway through a POV of a scene I was struggling on and decided to switch POV's, which will change up the outline for a chapter every now and then.
Which is why I don't write incredibly detailed outlines and try to keep it vague until I actually get to that chapter. It's a lot less daunting to rewrite a chapter outline than it is to rewrite the entire outline.
Fic outlines and Chapter outlines look a lot alike.
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This is what I said in the other ask, but I didn't elaborate on it all the way.
I make a list just like that, and then I try to put it in chronological order/in an order that makes sense. I keep the Fic outline vague by writing down "Goals" for a chapter rather than scenes. But I also keep notes to myself if I really think something is important. The more important I think a scene needs to be, the more details I write down to make sure my future self recalls what I had in mind when I thought it up.
Really simple example:
Chap 1 Goal: Peter gets to Gotham and meets Babs while running around. Meet Nightwing too? Get shelter.
Chapter 2 Goal: Bats are like "???" about Peter. Batfam dynamic important... Peter stalking Batfam back? Peter meet Batman >:)
When I get to a chapter, that's when I make a far more detailed list of wants/needs/goals. It's the Step 2 from the Step 1. Here are some examples from Chapter 5:
Needed to have:
More POV's from universe 1299 (Peter's home universe)
Tony's POV more specifically, how he's doing/feeling, what he's figured out
What they've figured out on 1299 side vs what's going on in 1300 (Gotham)
Explaining more about Peter's trauma/his past
Dick learning more about Peter, and vise versa
Wanted to have:
Ned being a more central character
Natasha :)
Loki being a little shit
Tony and Cap bickering
Peter talking to Nightwing again
The last name Grayson
Gymnastics!!
(This is the shortened list, because the chapters are so long)
When I looked at this list before writing my outline, I had to figure out how I could incorporate everything. If I needed more 1299 POV's, and I wanted Ned, Natasha, and Loki, there's one scene accounted for. I had to get their side of things and wanted that trio together. I needed a Tony POV, and I wanted Tony and Cap bickering, so those went together, plus I got 1299's POV of Ohnn and his plans explained.
I needed to have Peter explaining more about his trauma, and Dick and Peter to talk/get closer. I wanted a Nightwing POV, to have Peter say his last name, and them doing gymnastics. I knew Peter wouldn't willingly talk about that, so I had him have a nightmare. Not only did it give readers perspective but it made Peter more susceptible to talking to Nightwing because he was more emotionally vulnerable/lonely, and that's how that scene came together.
That's when I would write down the chronological order of these events by writing out "Scene Blocks." (This is what I wrote down but my handwriting was so bad I can't subject y'all to it):
scene 1- Ned talking to Loki. Natasha should be nearby and observing Loki's behavior. They are not on friendly terms. Ned is more worried about Peter than he is as to what Loki could be up to, so Natasha takes on that role.
scene 2- Tony is freaking out about Peter being in an alt dimension. He should attack Ohnn when he's not prepared for it. Beat his ass? Beat his ass. Cap there too.
scene 3- Peter's nightmare. "Ben, where do you go when you die?" "Where do you think?" "With you. Where you went."
scene 4- Nightwing and Peter.
Of course, things come to attention when writing. Like originally, Tony and Cap were arguing in the Tower. But it was a little too much like his and Natasha's argument, and I kept in mind that Tony is smart. Sometimes I forget that the characters are smarter than I am, so I have to account for what they would figure out. So Tony would have picked up the puzzle pieces and come to more conclusions than I originally thought about, and I figured he'd be way more proactive about it than just. Being in the Tower and waiting.
Which means that that scene ended up being as listed above: having a squabble with Cap, learning more about Peter's dynamic with the Avengers in this universe, and seeing how Tony is reacting to it by throwing himself head first into trying to capture Ohnn.
I'll realize I need something else to be mentioned or put in and I'll have to shimmy things around, but that's basically how it goes.
As for other forms of organization:
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Keeping a timeline is so important because it tells you a lot about the environment your characters are in. It's also important to remember what a character has on them, what money they've spent, who they've met/who you have mentioned, every alias that is being used, to read your work and write down edits you want to make before you make them, to write down ideas beforehand of situations you can use, and, most importantly: MAKE A MAP!! This has saved me so many times. Sometimes your brain WILL trick you or make it harder on you to envision a scene. Make a map of where your characters are physically!! It will save you too!!
As for foreshadowing and plot points, I'll let you in on yet another secret:
Your subconscious is doing a lot more than you think it is.
Sometimes when I foreshadow something, I didn't even know I was until I got to it. I very often go back to read chapters that came before this to see what I've mentioned and what I haven't, and when I do, I'll see something and go "I have to bring this back" or "I almost forgot about that!"
Other times, I am very aware of what I'm foreshadowing, and that's because I follow a mystery plot formula. You have to keep in mind everyone's intentions, all the time. How are they feeling? What are their motivations? And: what are they doing right now, while this character is doing this?
Like Beck and Ohnn. From the very beginning, I knew I had to make sure that it was obvious Ohnn wasn't working alone. From there, I had to weave through the story and slowly build him up as someone who's working behind the scenes. Even from Ned's first POV, I made sure to mention that this person knows Tony and is tech savvy.
My biggest tip is to make sure you reread your work or at least skip through it, because sometimes you don't even know that you placed something there.
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And sometimes, it's very purposeful. :)
I hope this helped! I really tried to keep it short but I am insane and the process is sooooo long. It sounds complicated but it really is simple when you're actually doing it I swear
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wabatle · 6 months
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☆~Pjsk boys getting jealous when someone flirted with you
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(wa)batle nonsense:
i just combined these two to make it easier on me ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯
warnings: very small mention of pepper spray, fem reader (i don't think theres anything else i am very bad at adding warnings)
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☆~Akito Shinonome
Akito would get very mad
He’d become very possessive, but then apologize for it later
He would put his hand around your waist and pull you closer to him to get his point across without even speaking
Akito would then tell the person about your relationship in a oddly threatening way
“I know what you’re trying to do. Back off. This is my girlfriend.”
If the person does not stop, you’ll just leave
He’ll tug your hand to walk away
If the person follows, remember how he punched Toya that one time?
Yeah, that’s what’s gonna happen.
violence is never the answer unless you’re akito
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☆~Rui Kamishiro
Does not waste any time whatsoever
He puts his arm around you and pulls your head onto his chest
Rui would then smile in his Rui way and tell the person about your relationship
“Excuse me, this is my girlfriend you’re trying to seduce, and I’d prefer it if you left her alone.”
If the person doesn’t stop, he’s grabbing your hand and you’re running away
bye rude person
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☆~Tsukasa Tenma
He gets mad in his Tsukasa way
Would 100% call you his co-star or the star of his life just to make the person know how much he loves you
“Hey! This is my co-star and she’s very tired from performing, so go away and let my star relax!!”
He’s still saying that even if you don’t perform with him
If the person doesn’t stop, he’s gonna yell
“WE’RE GONNA BE LATE, BETTER RUN!”
and off you go
on a separate note tsukasa is someone i cannot describe with words his reactions are so silly i love him sm
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☆~Toya Aoyagi
The most respectful one out of everyone there
He’s staying polite no matter what happens
“Please leave my girlfriend alone. Excuse us.”
If the person doesn’t stop he’s probably about to threaten to call the cops or once again be polite and ask them to leave
why is he so polite omg
BONUS☆!
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☆~KAITO
you can pick what kaito it is but it’s probably not niigo
edit: idek what im writing anymore is it even from pjsk or is it just kaito; the one that exists somewhere out there
Just laughs and wraps his arm around you
He’ll be polite but threatening too, a bit like Rui
But then he’ll actually threaten them if it gets that bad
“Excuse me, but in what place do you have a right to flirt with my girlfriend? Back off or else, haha!☆”
If they don’t stop he’s about to pull out a fake can of pepper spray to scare them off LMAO
help what kaito is this supposed to be is this even kaito help (ohedo julia night???)
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livelaughlovekny · 2 months
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You bake with him
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Notes: Modern AU, Gender neutral reader, 2nd person POV, Streamer!Reader, OOC!Muichirou
Summary: You try to bake a cake while Muichirou just watches.
a/n: ohmygod y'all its the way i tried writing muichirou as he was before he got his memories back and then halfway decided to try and write him after he got his memories back and changed it but the thing is I cant write EITHER personality well SO ITS LIKE HIM BUT NOT HIM CRIES also this is like really long and written without any er proofreading so IMSOSORRY
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  “Hello everyone! Welcome back to ‘Can I Cook It? Yes I Can!’, a series in which I try to create all sorts of foods, ranging from a bowl of chicken soup to macarons! Today’s objective is to bake a simple one-tier cake. Oh and, we have a guest today! Everyone, do welcome my beloved, Muichirou! He’s just here to observe, haha.” Stepping to the side, you allow your audience a view of your lover. Muichirou looks at the camera before glancing down at the comments section. It became extremely active the moment you moved aside.
  You were by no means the most viewed streamer, though you did have a dedicated fanbase of your own. On normal days, there would be a steady stream of comments. Occasionally, there would be a large influx of comments and views, but that only happens when you’re celebrating festivals by creating challenging foods. (The last time you tried, you ended up spending the entire next day cleaning up your kitchen.) So, it was quite surprising to see the number of viewers suddenly increase. You looked at the comments section too.
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gluedcheeks: OMG?? THATS YOUR BF ??
antidepressants98: HUHUHUH IM SUDENLY GAY
InADitch247: ahhh you two look so cute tgt!!! ><
allthingsblack: how does it feel to be gods bias?
EATINGRAMEN: @ allthingsblack right, GOD I SEE WHAT YOU DO FOR OTHERS
————
  The rest of the comments that followed had similar contents. You were stupefied. You were under no such impressions that Muichirou was anything less than gorgeous, but after being with him for so long, you naturally got used to it a little. Seeing the reactions of people who never had the chance to be graced by such a beauty for, you couldn’t help but a little smug and sneak a glance at your boyfriend. Surprisingly, he was already looking at you, having lost interest in the reactions of others earlier. Smiling a little, you moved back to block your audience’s view of him. Ignoring the flood of dismayed comments, you resumed your talk. “Now, let us get started! I’ll be sharing the link to recipe I’ll be following later. After last month’s baking incident, I decided to pick an easier recipe to follow today.”
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OKOKOKOKOKOK: understandable as you should
LALALALALALALA: its a surprise youre still willing to bake
————
  What could you and the comments possibly be talking about? Muichirou was mystified. Still, he silently watched you curiously as you grabbed the necessary ingredients and preheated the oven. Once you were done adjusting the settings on the oven and lining the baking pan with parchment paper, you moved on to the next step. You grabbed a bowl that you deemed big enough and dumped in some flour, baking powder and salt. Seeing this, Muichirou couldn’t help but blurt out “How do you know how much to add?” He did not see you measure the ingredients beforehand and the amount of each ingredient you poured in seemed questionable.
  “I don’t.” Ah what a simple response, but it gave Muichirou a better idea and guess of how “last month’s baking incident” could’ve happened. He mentally prepared himself for a “today’s baking incident”. Perhaps he should’ve worn a raincoat? He wasn’t familiar with baking but he was familiar with your uncanny ability to mess things up ridiculously so. He watched with new found interest as you whisked the ingredients before moving on to turning on your stand mixer. After fumbling with the switch and buttons a little, you managed to turn on it and waited a few minutes for it to beat the butter and sugar.
  Muichirou moved closer to you and looked over your shoulder. The butter and sugar now looked pale and creamy, which (to Muichirou’s surprise) matched what the recipe stated. Oh, maybe you weren’t that bad at baking? Unaware of your boyfriend’s skepticism, you continued with the next steps: adding two eggs. Now this was easy. You’ve cracked many eggs before. However, it seems that today wasn’t your day. You must’ve used too much force because the moment you tried cracking the egg apart, it burst open. The slimy egg whites and yolk now stained the front of your shirt and kitchen walls. Some of it already began to drip down your kitchen counter too. Muichirou silently concluded that you couldn’t bake.
  Without hesitation, he shook his head at you, sighed, and reached over to crack both eggs for you. He then proceeded to help you wipe off the egg remains from the walls and counter. Pointing at your stained shirt, he asked, “Are you not going to change? If you don’t wash it soon, it’s going to stain forever.” You wave a hand and laughed. “Of course not, I’m too lazy. This is my streaming shirt, no matter what happens, I’ll until I’m done to wash it.” That explained why this originally-purely-white shirt had all sorts of weird patches of colours on it.
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imachicken: AHHHHH HE LEANED OVER TO HELP YOU AJHHH
xstrxnxut: that’s literally the hottest thing i’ve ever witnessed
EATINGRAMEN: HOW TO BE EGG
whywouldiknow: taking a bath with my hairdryer rn !! :D
EATINGRAMEN: HOWTOBEEGG
allthingsblack: HOWTOBEEGG
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  Unlike your extremely active comments section, Muichirou decided to keep his thoughts to himself and chose to observe what else would happen.
  After adding milk, oil and vanilla into the bowl (all volumes were eyeballed obviously) and mixing it, you added the entire mixture of dry flour in and beat it until all ingredients were combined. (you were supposed to add half first, beat it, then add the other half but you wanted to “save time”). You then poured the batter into the baking pan. The recipe stated that you should use a spatula to smooth out the top. You could not find yours and decided to just move on to stuffing it into the oven. The recipe stated that you had to wait a minimum of thirty minutes. No troubles arose so far, impressive! Keep up the good work!
  Proud of yourself, you grinned before turning to the camera. “Haha, guess today’s baking session will be a success! I’ll now be making the cake’s frosting.” Grabbing the bowl used to beat the butter previously, you placed more butter into it and dumped some sugar in and allowed your stand mixer to beat the mixture. With a soft smile on his face, Muichirou leaned against the counter as he watched you dump more sugar (?), milk and vanilla into the bowl.
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OKOKOKOKOKOK: i didnt know frosting had salt in them
LALALALALALALA: thye don’t
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  There was still a lot of time left so you decided to interact with your audience. A quick glance at your viewership left you shocked. The numbers were nearly triple of your usual viewership and it was still steadily rising! Was having a new face really that effective in gaining more viewers? Of course not, the effectiveness depended on how attractive that face was! Perhaps you should invite Muichirou to join your streams more often, it seemed your fans really liked him and were extremely interested in him.
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coconut_972: how did you guys meet????????
user4356892: how long have you guys been tgt
lovelove: YOU TWO ARE SO CUTE WHO CONFESSED FIRST
WEEVHJ: WHATS YOUR BFS SKINCARE ROUTINE
dontclickonmyname: YEAH WHAT PROCUCTS DPES HE USW
EATINGRAMEN: what kind of ritual did you perform to be so lucky
allthingsblack: none, if youre not gods fav you obv wont get someone liek that
EATINGRAMEN: 😔
allthingsblack: 😔
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  Wow, you were certainly not expecting so many questions. You glanced over at your lover, silently asking if he was okay with all the attention. Muichirou simply smiled at you before answering a question at random, “Everyday, I made sure to stand on my head for three minutes while reciting the following line aloud ‘I have no doubt that even if everyone in the world opposes us we will get together because our love for each other is so great that it’s greater than the universe itself’ two hundred and ninety seven times. You have to make sure that you say it two hundred and ninety seven times within three minutes. You will definitely get your soulmate if you do this. I’m living proof.” He said all that with a nonchalant look. For a moment, you couldn’t tell whether or not he was serious. In the end, you decided not to dwell on it. After all, who cares? (Your audience certainly did. The comments section exploded with multiple users commenting that line along with the cartwheel emoji repeatedly.)
  Looking through the comments, you found a question to answer. “Oh, what’s our love languages? Well, mine is all of them, HAHA. And his is probably acts of service and words of affirmation. He used to be bad with his words but he’s getting better now!” You smiled lovingly at your boyfriend and he couldn’t help but smile back. Indeed, when the two of you first met, he was cold and aloof and held great disdain for anyone who wasn’t part of his family. But slowly and surely, he warmed up to you and now, the both of you have been together for quite some time and he has learnt to express his feelings a little better.
  The two of you spent quite some time together answering the questions. It was mostly you going through the comments, picking out questions out of the sea of “🤸 I have no doubt that even if everyone in the world opposes us we will get together because our love for each other is so great that it’s greater than the universe itself 🤸”. You answered most of the questions, with Muichirou occasionally chiming in to provide some tidbits about the both of you. He didn’t talk much but whenever he had something to say, it would either be to praise you or an affectionate insult (which was actually still clearly a compliment for you!!). He did not look at the camera or the screen but rather at you. He loved watching you excitedly talk about stuff.
  It was a while until you saw the following comments:
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OKOKOKOKOKOK: hey how long has the cake been in there already
LALALALALALALA: HAHA I THINK AN HOUR. AT LEAST.
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  Oh no, you completely forgot about the cake! Rushing to the oven, you put on your gloves before opening it, reaching into it, and pulling out the pan. It did not look like the golden brown it should be. And while the recipe stated you wait for the cake to cool before adding frosting, you decided that at the point, time did not matter. Haphazardly, you used a large spoon to scoop out the frosting and spread it on the cake.
  The frosting looked very uneven no matter how many times you tried to smooth it out. Oh well, who cares? Definitely not you! Using the same spoon, you scooped out a large chunk of the cake and turned around to offer it to Muichirou. He saw how the cake looked when it came out the oven. In fact, he could still see black peeking out of the uneven layers of frosting. How could he deny you though? Resigned to his fate, he opened his mouth and ate the cake obediently. He paused after the first bite. He slowly chewed again.
  You watched his reaction intently but could not tell what he was thinking. Finally, you asked, “Well?” Muichirou swallowed before answering. He smiled brightly. “Really good. In fact, you should let me finish the rest.” A beautiful bright smile blossomed on your face as you excitedly took a bite for yourself. Your blossomed smile immediately wilted. It. Was. Salty. And So. Very. Very. Burnt. Really good my foot! You had added large amounts of salt into the frosting instead of sugar and the cake tasted like charcoal (you did not know how charcoal tasted like but you were positive that this was how it must taste like)!
  You couldn’t even swallow the bite and spat it out into the bin. Looks like this baking session was a fail too! How disappointing, maybe better luck next time!
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EATINGRAMEN: im so jealous he could still smile and offer praises
allthingsblack: OHMYGOD RIGHT ?? like he even tried to make sure that only he would have to suffer
OKOKOKOKOKOK: I KNEW IT IT WAS SALT NOT SUGAR
LALALALALALALA: at least today wasn’t exactly a baking incident like last time
————
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a/n: ill really do anything just so I can avoid revising omfg
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sebsbarnes · 6 months
Text
letters to a loved one || tangerine
tangerine x reader
summary: the only form of communication you and tangerine can use when he is on a mission is email, however, as the weeks and months go by, your words have been left unanswered.
warnings: angst
word count: 1.4k
masterlist
a/n: this is a lot different than my normal works so i hope you enjoy this different format
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aug 5th, 2022: i know it's only been two days since you left but i miss you so much already! good luck today, kick some ass!! mwah! xoxo
aug 15th, 2022: hi honey. i hope the mission went well a few days ago! even though email is the safest way we can communicate while you're gone i know you can't always respond even if you're in a safe house. i'm not too worried, i know how skilled you and lemon are. tell him i say hi! i can't wait for you to be home, you estimated you'd be back on the 17th so i have a nice dinner planned. <3 love you so so much my sweet tang!
aug 27th, 2022: hey tang, i can't lie and say i'm not a tiny bit worried but i keep telling myself you've been gone longer before with zero communication. maybe it feels different now because of how long we've been together. i miss waking up to you and grabbing our keys and heading out for the day. if you see this message me back! even if you can't fully respond i'll settle with a smiley face if i must! haha. oh by the way i still cooked that dinner i had planned for us, it came out soooo yummy. but it took so long omg! you're lucky i love you and i'm willing to spend 8 hours in the kitchen again. it will probably taste better this time since you will be by my side. love you lots!
sept 12th, 2022: i only just saw the news of the bullet train derailment in japan on august 5th. that was your mission wasn't it? you said the 5th. i'm worried more now, i can't lie, but like i tell you every day i know how skilled you are. even though i never want to wish you are in a hospital i hope that's where you are recovering with lemon by your side. when you get the chance please email me back, okay? i love you.
sept 14th, 2022: tangerine if you see this please email or call me.
sept 30th, 2022: i wish i could talk to you just once. one word so i know you are okay. i can't reach lemon either. i wake up every day hoping you will be laying next to me. please, please give me something so i know you are alright? anything. where are you tangerine? i don't want to keep crying but that's all i can do. sit here in our empty house and cry. the walls feel like they are closing in on me. i went to our favorite breakfast spot the other day and i got that really sweet older lady with the grey curly hair as my waitress. she asked where you've been. i don't know how much longer i can keep saying you are gone for work and people believe it... i no longer believe it either. i hate typing it out. i don't want to believe something awful happened but something did, didn't it? i can feel it in my body. please reach out to me, i miss you so much and i love you so so much tangerine, please.
oct 26th, 2022: i love halloween, you know that more than anyone. decorations everywhere, piles of candy, and everyone dressing up pretending to be someone else for the night. now i feel bad about how much i bugged you about this year's halloween. my friends keep telling me to come out and join them, but if i'm being honest it's hard to do anything these days. it doesn't help that they think you just left me, ghosted me i guess. but they don't know what you do for work and i can't tell them. so i have to listen to them talk shit about you and i sit there trying to convince them you aren't this evil guy who ditched me and never looked back. maybe i should listen, maybe it's easier to believe you just left me than admitting to myself you're no longer here. i'm holding out, i'm trying so fucking hard to, tan. maybe in some sick joke you will pop up on halloween dressed in some stupid costume with a mask covering your face and in some grand reveal you will pull the mask off and i'll be in your arms again. it's wishful thinking. well, i have to go now, i'm meeting with a co-worker. love you.
dec 1st, 2022: i should be waking up this morning with your arms wrapped around me nearly crushing every bone in my body. but i didn't. and i haven't since the beginning of august. is it cruel now to admit i think you are gone. i really think you are and part of me has thought this since i saw the news of the bullet train. i feel scared. i'm starting to forget the little things about you. i can't play back the sound of your laugh in my head. i can't really picture the way your eyes crinkled. it makes me feel ill. i don't want to forget the small details about you. i crave to whisper goodnight and i love you to you. i crave just for your body next to mine. in the most innocent forms i crave you, like the way you'd absentmindedly play with my hair or pull out my chair or charge my phone when i always forget. the simple things i'm missing the most. i didn't realize i had so many forms of love until you've been gone. happy anniversary, dear.
jan 17th, 2023: tangerine, i'm not sure why i opened this email account. it's been over a month since i've checked it. maybe it was because i heard your favorite song earlier and thought of you a bit more than usual these days. i secretly hoped there would be a new message but that's foolish of me.
april 7th, 2023: Dear Tangerine, I know you won't read this email, but I felt as though I needed to explain what life has been like recently. My friends no longer bring you up in conversation which I am grateful for. I had to stop visiting our favorite breakfast place, each time I went they asked about you, even as recently as three weeks ago. I will miss their egg sandwich that you recommended to me on our third date but it is better off I no longer go there. Work has been great, a bit busy, but good. I removed your picture from my desk at the beginning of the new year. I saw the way my co-workers would stare a bit too long at it, I guess seeing it reminded them how I never mentioned you anymore. Speaking of co-workers, a few emails ago I mentioned I was meeting up with one of them. We've been seeing each other a lot outside of work, I enjoy their company. I can never say this to them but when they kiss me and hug me I sometimes think it's you. That's wrong to admit especially since I think I'm developing feelings for them, but they will never see this. They are kind and treat me well which I know you would be pleased to hear. I packed up your clothes in my house and put them in a box. I couldn't keep looking at them. I cried so much that I don't think I can cry again for years to come. I would hug your shirts and jackets so much that they lost your smell. I regret that a bit. I opened the box a few days ago and it smelled like me. Almost all signs of you are gone now that the remnants of your cologne is worn off the fabric. I think I might sell the house. It's too big for a single person now. It's too quiet in here and it almost feels like someone is watching me, it doesn't feel safe. Maybe that's because you provided me with safety. I'm not doing much today, it's actually pretty early right now, maybe I'll cook that dinner I never got to cook for you. I haven't since that day. I'm realizing how silly I sound in my own head as I type these words. Maybe I'll invest in a journal soon.
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