#ive been awake for an hour and a half but at least i don't have work today hehe 👻

[yawnderu]

K-9 — Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader | Chapter IV

Sick as a dog, and just as vicious.

1 2 3 4 5

What's a Lieutenant if not someone you can use as a stress reliever

Or

Being a gifted medic comes with free rewards

You weren't the only one catching up on some sleep. Simon was awake throughout Johnny's entire surgery despite having slept four hours the previous night, wanting to be available in case you needed his help, finally getting some much-needed rest after being practically forced by Price.

He wakes up six hours later, a small groan escaping his lips at the light entering his window. His burly arm comes up to cover his eyes, shielding them from the bright sun.

''Fuckin' hell.'' He muttered, getting up from bed and putting on a black balaclava. Shit went down yesterday, with Johnny almost dying, and Makarov is now free, able to continue killing civilians until they're finally able to catch him. At the very least, his best friend is alive and stable last time he visited.

Simon leaves his room, walking to the cafeteria to get a bottle of cold water and a few granola bars before heading to your quarters, knocking on the door softly in case you're asleep. No reply. He knows better, but... what if something happened to you? He uses the pathetic excuse to justify his actions, hand turning the doorknob carefully before stepping inside, footsteps surprisingly quiet for someone his size.

What a fucking sight. He stared at your sleeping figure for a while, taking in the details of your face when it wasn't pulled into a scowl or a bored expression, a small smile tugging on his lips at how peaceful you look before he realized how creepy he was being. He shook his head softly as if to snap out of it, putting the water bottle and granola bars before turning away to try and leave.

Try, because a much smaller hand wrapped around his wrist, almost making him flinch because of how sudden it was. He looks down at you only to find your eyes boring into his, tugging him closer by the wrist. A confused Simon followed like a lost dog before his feet rooted on the ground in front of your bed, giving you a questioning look with his eyes.

''Come lay with me.'' Your voice is much gentler than usual, laced with something he can't quite recognize yet. Simon knows better, really he does, but who is he to question the medic he's been pining on for months? He hesitantly removes his boots and climbs into bed with you, keeping a respectful distance despite his behemoth frame taking over half of the bed. His muscles tense up when he feels you cuddling up to him, being a painfully fitting piece against his body.

''What are you on bout, doc?'' You don't reply, simply examining his eyes for any hints of hesitation. You find nervousness, curiosity, doubt, and even the smallest hints of fear, but no hesitation at all. Your hand sneaks up to the bottom of his balaclava, pulling it all the way off before your lips crash into his hungrily. It takes him a few seconds of pure confusion before he kisses back, arms wrapped around your waist, and whatever questions he has on why you're doing this all of sudden pushed to the back of his mind.

Your hands grab at anything they can reach— muscle, skin, hair... anything, holding onto his much bigger body like a lifeline, his warm hands running up and down your back. He has fantasized about this moment so many times, yet the real thing is so different in a good way.

''Tell me I can touch you, bird.'' You simply nod your head and try to go back to kissing him, but he pulls away, gently squeezing your waist to make you look at him.

''Use your words.'' His words are almost pleading, wanting to make sure you want the same thing.

''I want you to touch me, Simon.'' Not a second passes before his lips are back on yours, tongues wrapping around each other's as his hands start to drift down, grabbing a handful of your ass. His touch is so desperate it almost makes you laugh, one of your hands sneaking down his shirt and feeling him up, defined muscles flexing under your touch. His slightly shaky hands fumble with the button of your jeans, breaking away from the kiss just to look at you and make sure you still want it. The half-lidded look you give him is enough confirmation, pulling down your jeans and getting on his knees, between your legs.

"Been wanting to do this since I saw ya." He confesses, too excited for his fantasies finally coming true to even feel remotely bashful about his words. He lifts up your shirt enough to reveal your tummy, gentle kisses planted on every single inch of skin his lips can reach as he slowly descends, planting open mouthed kisses over your clothed cunt.

"Fuck—" Your back arches at the feeling, eyes screwed shut as your hand goes to the back of his head, pushing him closer. His tongue is warm and wet, saliva mixing in with your growing arousal. He pushes your panties to the side, looking down at your gleaming pussy before digging in, tongue lapping the wetness before he latches onto your cunt, sucking and licking away like a starved man.

"You taste s'fucking good." He praises before going back down, the flat of his tongue moving around your cunt before slowly going inside, your whiny moans and hands gripping his short hair are all the encouragement he needs. He latches onto your clit next, long fingers teasing the entrance of your cunt, spreading your arousal all over them before he slowly enters you with one.

His fingers are thick and long, whiny moans escaping your lips as he adds a second one, making scissoring motions as he fucks his fingers deeper and deeper into you, tongue alternating between licking and sucking on your clit before hesitantly letting go.

"Sit on my face." It's not even a request, it sounds like a plea, though you quickly listen to his words for the first time ever, cunt hovering above his face as soon as he lays back down. He grabs a handful of your ass, squeezing the plush and pulling your body down to his face, eating you out like a starved man. His hands let go of your ass to unbuckle his belt, barely having the strength to pull his hard cock out of his jeans, eyes closing as he focused on the dual sensation of pleasuring you with his mouth and pleasuring himself with his hand, pre staining his fingers as his hand moves up and down his shaft faster.

"Fuck— Just like that, Si." Si. You never call him anything other than Simon. Sometimes Ghost, when you're needed during missions and hang around them in the helos, but the way you say his name... so much affection, even if it only comes from making you feel good. He's pathetic— God, he knows he's being pathetic, cock twitching in his hand at the idea of you reciprocating his complex and strange feelings for you, ropes of thick cum shooting out into his hand and stomach, a low growl coming out of his lips as he squeezed his cock dry of cum.

He focuses solely on you now, tongue swirling and flickering all over you, his clean hand coming up to rub your clit with his thumb while he assaults your dripping wet cunt with his lips and tongue. Your hands go down to his head, fingers pulling on his short hair while you use his face to feel good, getting closer and closer to the edge.

"Si, I'm gonna cum—" But he doesn't stop. Hell, his thumb moves even faster over your sensitive bud, tongue-fucking your pussy as deep as he can until he can feel your body shaking on top of him, thighs closing in on his head and squeezing as the intensity of your orgasm washes over you, his waiting mouth taking in all your juices, lapping at them greedily until you pull away from the stimulation, shaky legs managing to position yourself next to him, head against his chest.

"You hear that? Price is calling you." You lie, unable to contain the smirk on your lips as he flicks your nose.

"Piss off, doc." His burly arms wrap around you, a loud groan of protest escaping your lips when you realize you're forced to cuddle with him.

[PREVIOUS]

[woso-dreamzzz]

Proud IV

Hardersson x Teen!Reader

Summary: The night after the derby

The light from the tv was still on when you crept down the stairs.

You woke to the pain in your ankle and rolled around your bed in agony. You briefly considered just laying there, sucking it up and trying to go back to sleep but in the end, the pain was just too intense and you surrendered to getting painkillers.

As you hobbled down the stairs, you inwardly cursed yourself for not grabbing any before going to bed. Your Momma had insisted on you putting some on your bedside table but you had been adamant that you would be okay.

As usual, you wished you had listened to her as you hopped down the stairs as quietly as you could.

You ducked into the kitchen, immediately rummaging through the medicine cabinet for some painkillers. You grabbed them but squinted trying to look at the dosage.

You didn't want to turn on the light.

Momma was a light sleeper. Even light coming up the stairs from the kitchen could wake her and you knew if she woke up then she would fuss over you and you didn't want that.

You could see a sliver of light from the living room though and you suddenly remembered that Morsa had been exiled there for the night because of your injury.

You assumed she was still awake and wouldn't mind company so you hobbled towards her.

She was still awake, like you predicted, lying on her side on the sofa.

The light you had seen earlier was the light from her phone, pressed up close to her face as she browsed social media.

She looked up though when you came hobbling in. She sat up.

"Hey," Magda said," Are you okay? Is something wrong?"

You lifted the pack of painkillers up. "Needed to check the right dosage." You threw them at her.

"Two," She replied, catching it easily and checking the packaging," And then no more for four hours."

"How long until they kick in?" You dry swallowed them.

"Half an hour or so. Are you staying here until they work?"

You nodded, falling easily back onto the sofa next to her.

Magda adjusted, throwing the blanket she was using over you as well and forcing you to prop your foot up on the table with her pillow.

"Comfortable?" You asked wryly and she rolled her eyes.

"I think Pernille made us buy this sofa just so I don't get a goodnight sleep when she's annoyed at me."

You grinned, slowly forgetting about the pain in your foot. "Why tell you how pissed she is when she can just show you?"

"I hope you don't get her vindictive streak," Magda joked," Sometimes she's just plain mean."

"And yet you're still with her."

Magda shrugged. "Maybe I like her like that."

Your nose wrinkled up in disgust. "That's disgusting."

She winked at you. "You'll understand one day."

A pit formed in your stomach and words spilled from your mouth before you could stop yourself. "I don't think I actually will."

"What does that mean?"

Magda shrieked at Pernille's voice, nearly falling off the sofa as her head whipped around to see Pernille leaning against the doorframe. Thankfully though, Pernille didn't lay into her for keeping you up (though Magda knew that lecture was coming soon) because she was focussed on you, brows furrowed in confusion.

You shrugged as Pernille moved to sit opposite you in the armchair.

"I just...I don't really think I'll ever get it. Sex isn't..." You made a vague gesture with your hands that only served to confuse your mothers further.

Magda cleared her throat. "So," She said," Sex is when-"

"I know what sex is!" You cut her off quickly," I just...I don't like it."

"It's okay," Pernille said," You're still young. You don't need to rush into anything and-"

"No!" You felt the urge to tear your hair out. "You're not getting it. I..." You took a moment to collect your thoughts. "I don't want to have sex. Ever. It's not a thing for me."

There was silent for a moment before Magda spoke.

"Well," She said," At least we won't have to worry about you getting pregnant."

"Magda!"

Pernille looked scandalised at her words but a bubble of laughter erupted from your throat and you decided to get everything off your chest.

"And I'm not into dating either. I don't get romantic feelings for people." To soften the blow, you added. "Oh, and I'm planning on moving to Greece, changing my name and becoming a shepherd."

Silence again.

"Will you name a sheep after me?"

"Magda!" Pernille snapped again," No, you will not be getting a sheep named after you!"

You continued to laugh, feeling something settle in your chest at the way Morsa began to list all the benefits of having sheep-Magda in the house with her.

"I'm going to bed," You said.

You left without much fanfare after that, knowing that when you came down in the morning that your mums will be curled up on that sofa together, still fast asleep.

[bluejaysandblackbats]

Catch and Release

Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam

Summary: AU where Jason doesn't die in the explosion and he and Tim end up attending the same high school months later.

Chapters: 6/?

Characters: Jason Todd, Bruce Wayne, Alfred Pennyworth, Tim Drake, Dick Grayson, Barbara Gordon, Sebastian Ives, Jack Drake, Janet Drake

Relationships: TBA

Additional Tag: Jason Todd Lives, Jason Todd-centric, POV Jason Todd, POV First Person, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake Has Issues, Tim Drake is Not Robin, Jason Todd is Not Robin (Anymore), Bruce Wayne Needs a Hug, Alfred Pennyworth is the Best, Alfred Pennyworth Knows, Stalker Tim Drake, Jason Todd Has Chronic Pain, Jason Todd Has PTSD, Angst with a Happy Ending, Unlikely Friends, Injury Recovery, Emotional Baggage, Rage, Bruce Wayne is Bad at Communicating

Chapter Six: Visiting Hours

I woke up from an antidepressant-induced sleep to Bruce setting my schoolwork on the desk. "Sorry, I didn't mean—."

I pushed my palms into my eyelids to keep from crying. "It's okay... I'm okay," I lied.

"I can stay home tonight if you want," Bruce offered. I shook my head.

"You're good," I mumbled. I wanted Bruce to stay, but I knew he couldn't. Bruce offered only to see if I'd permit him to leave. I could've been honest about my pain and made him stay, but I let him go. There was no way for him to know that I was lying. He didn't think to ask twice. I lay awake until I could drift back to sleep.

As soon as I fell asleep, I woke up with a jolt to a tap, tap, tapping on my window. I wasn't easily startled, but the thing was, there were no trees near my window. I pulled myself out of bed and grabbed a pen from my nightstand before approaching my window. I parted my curtains just enough to see if someone was out there, and sure enough, there Tim was. He'd climbed up the trellis to get to my window. I opened my window and pulled him in, despite every nerve in my body attacking me all at once. "Tim, what are you doing here?" I asked as I slid down to the floor. Tim didn't weigh much, but I was in so much pain getting out of bed took half my strength. He smiled and sat next to me. "You know I think you're insane, right?"

"I know... But I was worried you got in trouble for being out so late last night, so I decided to come and check on you," Tim whispered. Pulling him in the window sent my back into spasms which meant I couldn't stand, even if I wanted to.

"Tim, you didn't have to do all that. I didn't get in any trouble... I just—. I'm not feeling well," I explained. Gross understatement.

"You can't get up, can you?" Tim asked. He was so coolheaded about it I couldn't move myself to lie. I nodded. "I know you don't want any help, but I'm pretty sure I can't leave you on the floor like that."

I begrudgingly reached out for him, and he pulled me up. I winced, and he profusely apologized as he helped me to bed. "My dad threw his back out last summer and got stuck at home with me for a whole week... It was pleasant," Tim whispered as he pulled my blankets over me. I thought that would be it, but he pulled up a chair and dug in his backpack for something.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Hanging out with you... Unless you want to be alone—."

"I definitely don't want that... But do your parents know you're here? It's pitch black out there," I said out of concern for his safety.

"My mom and dad left the morning after they got back. They don't stay home for long," Tim answered. I frowned. At least I saw Bruce every day. He plugged up a projector and asked me if I could see okay from that angle. I nodded.

He set everything up and put the movie on. He sat on the floor, and I looked over at him. "Tim, there's a folding bed and blankets in my closet if you wanna spend the night... And I've got pajamas in my bottom drawer that might fit you," I offered. Tim thanked me and asked if he could use my shower. I nodded. The movie was some 90's sci-fi thing, but I didn't mind.

I fell asleep before he came back, but it wasn't such a deep sleep that I didn't feel him pull my blankets up. I faintly heard the creaking of the fold-out bed and Tim's gentle series of sighs. I think he was asleep too. Things were fuzzy after the movie. I was in a deep sleep by that time, only waking to the sound of Alfred bringing in breakfast. I turned on my side to see if Tim was there. His limbs hung limply toward the floor as he slept on his stomach, mouth agape. "Alfred, I can-."

"No worries, Master Jason. I'll bring up a second tray shortly," Alfred smiled. Alfred was good at keeping secrets. I winced as I pulled myself up to a reclining position and ate breakfast, waiting for Tim to wake up.

Tim took a sharp inhale and turned toward me. "Feeling better?" Tim asked. I nodded. It wasn't a complete lie. At least I was able to sit up. "Thanks for letting me spend the night."

"Thanks for being a good friend," I whispered, "Stay for breakfast. Alfred's on his way up with a tray for you." Tim nodded.

"Mind if I come back tonight?" Tim asked. I nodded.

I could tell he had something on his mind. "Did your parents say goodbye before they left?" I questioned.

"Mhm... Mom woke me up and sat with me for a few minutes, and Dad said his goodbyes on the way out the door," Tim whispered. He seemed detached from it all. I know how I felt when Bruce went away, but Tim didn't feel anything. If he did, he kept it under wraps. He changed into some of my clothes, and I chuckled.

"This must be what it's like to have a little brother," I laughed without thinking. Tim lit up like a Christmas tree. I don't think I've ever seen him so excited about anything. He stayed for breakfast as promised, and Alfred took him to school, leaving me alone in the manor.

I hated being alone. It was terrifying. So terrifying it forced me to call Dick. I hated being afraid. Anger was a much simpler emotion to piece together. I called Dick in the middle of a panic attack. "Hello?" Dick answered the phone.

"Do you remember when I met your friends?" I asked. It was all I could manage to say without sounding panicked.

"Jason, do you want to FaceTime?" Dick asked. I made a soft noise, and he initiated the call. I answered and took a breath as I looked at his face. "Hey," Dick smiled as he whispered in a horse-taming voice. "Stuck in bed?"

I nodded. I couldn't look at Dick and speak at the same time. He'd seen me like that a few times, but I think it calmed him to see me feel something other than anger. He always knew how to pull me out of it. "Alfred's out?" Dick asked. I nodded. "Ohh... Okay, I see. Alfred's coming back. He always does... Until then, I'm not going anywhere. I'm just making a grilled cheese sandwich and avoiding my responsibilities. I heard you've been coming home from school later and later... Girlfriend?"

I shook my head. "Boyfriend?" Dick questioned.

"No," I mumbled. Dick grinned. He managed to distract me long enough to get me to talk. Dick might have asked a hundred questions if that's what it took to get me to relax.

"I like the secrecy of it all," Dick chuckled, "But I hope you're not doing anything dangerous. Can you promise me that you haven't done anything dangerous?"

I nodded. "I promise. I've been doing homework every day after school," I answered, "Most dangerous thing I've done is take a cab home every night."

"Dangerous for you or the taxi driver?" Dick laughed. I smiled and shut my eyes. "Want me to stay while you sleep?"

I nodded and sank into the pillows. I could hear Dick fiddling with plates and shaking a bag of chips in the background. I fell asleep and awakened to the feeling of someone taking my phone off my chest. My eyes shot open, and I grabbed their wrist. To my shock, I realized it was Bruce. "It's alright. Your phone's dying," Bruce reassured me. I wondered how long I'd been asleep. I looked around the room for a clock, and Bruce pushed my hair back.

"You've been asleep for hours," Bruce whispered, "Want me to stay tonight?" I shook my head.

"Bring back ice cream? Doesn't matter what flavor," I whispered. Bruce smiled and nodded.

"Okay... It's not that late yet, though. We've got a few hours. I wanna talk to you," Bruce whispered. He sat on my bed next to me, and I tensed up because I knew he knew something. "You talked to Dick today... Right?"

I frowned. "Yeah, Alfred had to go run errands, and I—. Bruce, I'm okay. I lost my grip for a second. Only a second," I whispered.

"I know... Jason, remember how we talked about the dangers of you telling all you know to a psychiatrist?" Bruce questioned. I nodded.

I thought psychiatrists were off the table. They were a liability that neither of our alter egos could risk. "What if you told bits and pieces? Do you think it would help?" Bruce asked.

"Can't I just talk to you?" I questioned. Bruce went slack-jawed, and he looked me in the eyes. I think we were both terrified. "Bruce, please."

"Jason, I love you, but—." He stood up and left me alone. Bruce abandoned me.

[dollsonmain]

This surgery has been very different than the last one and that's funny because I basically got the same surgery all over again PLUS a more different extra surgery.

(plus other blather)

First Surgery I was very irritated (burning and pain in urethra) and up all night having to use the bathroom painfully every 30 minutes for the first 3 nights, then getting longer and longer periods of sleep before having to get up. This Time I got up once around 3:30 which is almost making it all the way through the night since That Guy's alarm goes off at 4. I'm not feeling any of the irritation from the first time, just discomfort from the right stent again.

FS BIG, BIG pain flare in the night, once home needed the heat bear to get to sleep every night. TT nothing unexpected or unbearable. Left kidney got a little warm for a bit but that passed. Right side uncomfortable from the stent but not as bad as it had been once the old one calcified which might happen again. Didn't need the heat bear. -This may have to do with the timing of coming home vs surgery time and I may start having more pain as time goes on today and tomorrow. The discomfort is already building a bit. Zap zap.

FS occasional loss of bladder control for the first two days. TT no problems, there. Wore the depends on the way home but didn't need to use the restroom at all until bed time, and wore one overnight but didn't need it. That Guy insists that's because I'm dehydrated despite having been on IV fluids, when it's just less irritation and no loss of bladder control.

FS I was pretty much out once the anesthesiologist gave me the fentanyl, though I remember talking to the people in the OR, them saying I was drunk, me saying I don't drink alcohol, and the anesthesiologist saying that explained why I was laughing so much, it was my first time being drunk. I didn't move myself to the operating table because I was unable and remember them putting the mask on my face, then nothing until I woke up. TT I was still fully aware and mobile when I got to the operating room, moved myself from the PACU bed to the operating table, was able to lift my legs to assist with putting the calf cuffs on, was not laughing like a goof, remember the mask, a nurse saying something like "Ok, here we go." and then nothing. The nurse said I wouldn't remember any of that. One of the nurses talked to me like I was 5 and it was weird.

FS I was fully awake when they went to put me under despite having not slept in a few days. TT I was half asleep already even though I'd slept the night before. It was around 2pm and I'm always sleepy at 2pm.

FS when I was coming out of anesthesia there were colorful rectangles everywhere in my vision and I remember trying and struggling to speak, talking about the rectangles. A nurse said "You're waking up" once I managed to say "Rectangles" out loud and then I was awake pretty soon after that if a little disoriented. TT That Guy says I was the last person left for the day and everyone was trying to get me to wake up so they could go home. Nurse kept coming by and saying my name and I struggled to rouse. I didn't say anything (at least not while I was awake enough to be aware of speaking), just couldn't wake up fully. I didn't wake up fully until I'd been home a few hours, but then had to drag myself to bed, exhausted.

-

Armchair diagnosis but I think my urologist might be autistic. He's very straightforward saying things like "Anesthesia is safer than going on the highway so don't worry. I mean, you COULD die." and like "This surgery is pretty simple. I COULD poke a hole in your ureter but that's not likely." things you might expect a doctor to mince words on a bit.

He was having a conversation with another doctor out in the middle of the PACU where the nurses' station and doctors' PCs were about prostate exams and the other doctor was being kind of crude about it (he'd been going around being crude and loud the whole time) and my doc was again being very straightforward and explaining the other doc's anecdotes about how he reacted to it. The other said ONE drop of semen came out, and my doc was like "You likely had a stream of semen through your ureter as opposed to one drop and peed it out later." When my doc left, the other was like "He's really serious...."

At one point That Guy brought up the discrepancy in the cost of the antibiotics and the doc started going on about how messed up the US health care system is. Doc said that some pharmacies charge more than others so while we're doing medical stuff in Next Town Over, we'll just use the hospital's pharmacy since we'll be there anyway. Bonus that it's a drive-up pharmacy so I don't have to walk through the walmart in agony to get meds.

He told me that he doesn't like to wear flip flops because he can't stand the feeling of something between his toes and that his wife thinks he has sensory issues.

He also loved the Barbie Movie. His four daughters asked to go see it and he liked it a lot. That's not part of the armchair diagnosis, I just found that interesting. Both That Guy and the other male nurse were like "Ew misandry" but he was like no it was great you should see it.

All of this makes me like him and trust him a bit more as a doctor.

He keeps saying I'm small and I'm confused by that, but I guess most of his patients are elders and/or male.

-

I've had a lump growing on my arm for as long as I can remember that I thought might be a tumor and suddenly got bigger and harder the past few months but now that I've been on antibiotics for a few weeks it's gotten smaller and softer again, so I guess that's a cyst.

That Guy said the doctor told him to tell me to reduce my antibiotics to once a day after I remove the left stent tomorrow. That seems illogical considering how antibiotics work, and the after care instructions say to make sure I take the antibiotics the day before and the day of removal and that there are no changes to my medications, so I'm going to have to call the office and ask about it. I've learned not to take That Guy at his word.

[nightinghoul]

In Narcolepsy News...

I know Ive already posted twice today but, look...

I went to have an evaluation again today, and told the doctor, "I'm doing so much better. I sleep about twelve hours a night, but at least when I'm awake, I'm awake, ya know?

Doctor: So when you wake up in the morning you feel rested and alert?

Me: Well, no. I feel pretty sluggish in the morning, and it takes me a couple of hours to get out of bed.

Doctor: But then you feel awake for the rest of the day?

Me: Well, no. I take a nap in the middle of the day for about four hours. But I get a nice window of awake time.

Doctor: We need to do something to improve your situation...

Me: Oh... dang.

*Returning to Journaling mode*

Okay, so, but... This is how I've been for about 20 years, and it was always brushed off as, "Everyone is tired"?

I realized I sleep 16 hours a day, and spend about 18 hours a day in bed.

So, I'm awake for six hours... So I don't work out, or have a job, because for those six hours I like to work on art, or clean my house.

And I sleep more than half the time.

On the plus side, I haven't had a sleep attack or cataplexy for over a month.

[frauleinfunf]

Dadrius Week Day 7: Adoption

@sergeantsporks this is has been a fun week, i really liked having these prompts to do a little free writing session after work every day.

Hunter leaned on Darius’ shoulder, barely awake as he filled out the admittance form. He wasn’t throwing up for now, but he still had strong waves of nausea.

As Darius reached the end, he hesitated and hovered his pen over the paper. Right next to where it asked for his signature, in plain text was Relationship to Patient. That was a sticky question. He knew he should’ve started having this conversation with Hunter by now. It’d been two months since he moved in. But between the stress of rebuilding the Isles, getting Hunter into therapy, and, if Darius was being honest with himself, fear of rejection, it got put to the back burner. Hexside and the therapist were content with caretaker as a place holder until proper paperwork was filled out, but he knew the Healing Coven would be different.

He put those thoughts out of his head and filled it as he would any other form.

x

Hunter was asleep now, hooked up to an IV of fluids and medicine to abate the nausea. His palisman was nestled in his hair, much more relaxed than he had been all day. The healers wanted him to stay overnight for observation, but he should be well enough to leave tomorrow once he was decently hydrated.

Darius sat in a hard chair, rubbing his back. It was not easy to admit how bad the chair was for his aging back. He'd have to use abomination for makeshift furniture if he wanted to be able to move in the morning.

One of the healers came in. She didn't leave after checking Hunter's vitals. She simply stood there and said "Sir, visiting hours ended half an hour ago. You'll have to leave."

Darius quirked an eyebrow. "Isn't family allowed to spend the night."

"Yes," she said, a twinge of annoyance in her voice. "Family. But you put caretaker when you filled out the form."

Darius simply shifted in his seat. "You can't expect me to leave him alone for the night."

Flapjack let out a tweet of indignation.

"Right," Darius said with a dismissive hand wave. "Alone expect for his palisman."

The Healer sighed. "Sir, I don't get enjoyment out of kicking people out. But security would throw an absolute fit if I let an unauthorized person stay after hours."

Darius didn't answer, instead looking down at Hunter and gently combing his fingers through his hair. Unauthorized person. That's what he got for neglecting even the basic responsibility of filling out the paperwork for legal guardianship.

"Look," the Healer said. "With how sick he was and the medicine we gave him, he might not even wake up before visiting hours start tomorrow. If you don't leave, I'll have to call security, and I can't guarantee they won't wake him."

Darius rose. "Alright, alright, I'm leaving."

He looked over his shoulder towards Flapjack. "I'm trusting you to keep an eye on him."

Flapjack raised his wing and gave a salute. Darius smiled and once again silently remarked on what an odd pair he and Hunter made.

x

Darius tried to go to sleep that night. But anxiety had reached every crevice of his mind. He ended up calling Eberwolf to come over, who in turn came with Raine and the Clawthorne sisters in tow.

Lilith had brought over a book on adoption. Eda had brought over a jug of Apple Blood.

"Have you discussed adoption with the child in your care?" Lilith read from the book as she pointedly ignored Eda waving the jug in her face.

"C'mon Lily," Eda whined, "If you're not gonna drink at least pass it to Eber."

"Eda, please take this seriously!" Lilith said, scowling. None the less, she still passed it to Eberwolf, who had to grab on to reach the neck.

Darius cleared his throat. "I...haven't really discussed this with Hunter. It's just been hard to figure out how to approach it, especially with how his last adoption went."

Eda snorted. "Do we need to list out all the ways you're nothing like Belos?"

Darius rolled his eyes. "I know that, Edalyn. But he still has all that trauma to work through. I just don't want to spring it on him in case he reacts badly."

Raine sat up a little more straight in their cross legged position. "You don't have to go all in at once. Just talking about it with him will probably help. As long as he doesn't feel like he's being forced into a decision." they said. "Besides, it's better to do it now before another situation like this happens."

Eda nodded. "If I was in your shiny white boots, I would've handcuffed myself to the bed. At least with something less permanent like legal guardian, you'll get peace of mind."

Eberwolf brought his head up and wiped some Apple Blood off his mouth. He nudged the jug towards Darius. "Pup likes you." he growled. "Whatever happens won't change that."

Darius nodded and took a swig.

x

Darius came at least an hour before visiting hours started. The woman at the front desk at the very least took pity on him, and let him go up fifteen minutes beforehand.

Hunter was still stirring out of his sleep when Darius walked in. Flapjack was on his shoulder, gently pecking him awake. When his eyes were fully open, he looked over and gave Darius a tired smile.

"How are you feeling?" Darius asked as he pulled up a chair.

"Like I got hit by ten airships." Hunter said, his voice gravelly. "Did they make you leave? I woke up last night and you weren't here."

The chirps from Flapjack told Darius that he was leaving out some details.

"Shut up." Hunter huffed at his Palisman.

Darius let out a light chuckle. "Well, only family is allowed after visiting hours...and I technically have no legal claim to you."

Hunter looked down towards the floor. "Oh."

Maybe Darius had been wildly off base. Maybe the unofficial nature of their relationship made Hunter more anxious than a proper arrangement would.

He a terrible habit of assuming what the boy was thinking, didn't he? Well, that may have destroyed their relationship once, but Darius would be damned if he let that happen again.

"Hunter," he said. "I think it might be time we started discussing...adoption."

The boy stared at him, mouth agape. Darius stiffened. Did he send him spiraling with one sentence?

Hunter broke into the biggest smile Darius had ever seen on him as his eyes welled with tears. He threw his arms around Darius, and Darius hugged back.

[faofinn]

Day 29 - Head Injury

A follow on from a Whumptober fic - here

@mediwhumpmay

Fao’s head spun as they settled him inside. At least it was warmer, though he was still cold. He gripped Sheila’s hand tightly as they fussed, though he could feel himself slipping. He didn’t want to pass out, but it was beginning to feel inevitable, his vision blurring into black. 

Fao drifted in and out of consciousness throughout the trip to hospital, struggling to stay with it, despite the people talking to him. When he was aware, he fought against the people touching him but he didn’t have much energy to do anything. Everything hurt, he felt so weak, and every jolt made the dizziness worse. They weren’t far from the hospital, though, and Fao fought to stay awake as they got him inside and transferred across onto their bed, groaning as they moved him. 

This is Fao, he's 23 years old. He was playing rugby when he was tackled at his shoulders around half an hour/forty minutes ago. Took a significant hit to the head and was knocked unconscious on impact, though came to quickly, initially GCS 12 rising to GCS 14. Obviously deformed collarbone so query fracture there. No c-spine tenderness, but boarded for MOI. He's been agitated with us, but lost consciousness again during transport, GCS 3 for about four minutes. Became unable to maintain his own airway and had a respiratory arrest. We ventilated him for about 2 minutes before a spontaneous return, tolerated OP and NP during. He's had a gram of IV paracetamol - has a 20 in left ACF. Obs are as follows - Resp at 18, Heart rate 134, sats 97% on air, now 100% on 15L. Bp 103/62, did drop to 89/45 during his unresponsive episode. BM was 5.1, GCS as before, pupils equal but sluggish. He is allergic to morphine, but other opiate derivatives are okay. Do you need anything else from us?”

The consultant shook her head. “That’s great, thank you.” She said, then moved to speak to Fao. “Hi Fao, I’m Grace, I’m one of the doctors here. Looks like you’ve taken a bit of a hit. There’s going to be loads of people around you for a minute, whilst we get you all set up and make sure we know all of what’s going on, alright? It can be disorienting, try not to worry. We’ll tell you what we’re doing as we do it.”

Fao struggled to listen, but just about managed, trying to focus on the doctor’s face. “‘Kay.” He mumbled. “My mum?”

"She's around, just letting us do our checks first."

“Can I have her? Please?” He whimpered. 

Sheila pushed through, her son's request breaking through her want to follow the rules. She gripped his hand, squeezing in to press a kiss to his forehead, trying to avoid the blocks and tape. 

"I'm here, sweetheart. I'm right here."

He managed a smile. “Mum.”

"I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm staying with you, I'm just gonna let them do their things they need to."

“Headache.” He complained. 

"I'm not surprised."

“Feel shit.”

"Again, not surprised. Was a shitty tackle."

“Don’t remember.”

"Illegal, they knocked you clean out."

“Oh.”

"Yeah, that's why they're a bit busy around you."

“Feel… fuzzy.”

She swallowed thickly. It was just the concussion, that was all. "You will, you're gonna be fine."

“Yeah. Gonna be fine.”

"Course you are."

“Got you, but don’t feel well.”

"These lovely people are gonna fix you up."

“Mm.” He was quiet for a moment, part of him trying to understand what they were saying. He wanted to know what was going on. His brows pulled together as he focused, but didn’t manage to get anything useful to register in his brain. 

Sheila recognised the look in his eyes. "Hey. They're wanting to take you for a scan, see if any damage is there."

“No thanks.”

"You don't have a choice." She said gently. 

“I don’t want it, though.”

"You need it. You might have hurt yourself more than we can see." Sheila murmured softly. 

“No thank you.”

"Fao, you've got to. You currently can't make that decision."

He whined, and although he protested endlessly, he didn’t have a choice. They took him through to the scanner, and he wasn’t sure if he was tired or they’d given him something, but it was harder to focus and stay awake. About halfway through the scan, he’d drifted a little, but almost jolted awake in fear, nausea suddenly overwhelming him. 

“‘M gonna be sick.” He said, panic rising. 

"We're nearly done, Fao. Take some slow deep breaths." The tech said.

"If he's said he's going to be sick, he's going to be sick." Sheila snapped. "He's not stupid."

“Gonna be sick.” Fao repeated, swallowing thickly. “Help?”

They finally listened to him, and staff came in, helping him onto his side as he was sick. He felt so horribly out of control, held up and in pain, trying desperately to breathe through the nausea. Everything was hazy and horrible, the room spinning, and once he’d finally finished they settled him back on his back. They’d need to do the scan again now, but at least they’d given him some antiemetics. 

They’d started to help and he was able to drift again whilst the scan happened, letting the hazy darkness pull him under. They got through the whole thing without any drama this time, and then he was moved back to resus to await the results. 

They let him and Sheila know quite quickly that they couldn’t see any significant head injury like a bleed or fracture, that it was likely nothing more than a severe concussion, but they’d need to wait for the more detailed scan report. They could, however, get him out of the blocks and sat up a little, which helped him to feel more awake and oriented. He still struggled to keep his eyes open, and his collarbone was absolutely killer, the painkillers hadn’t really touched it. But at least he was okay.

[pbandjesse]

I don't know what to do right now. James is home, thank God, but they are in so much pain. They just want to sleep. But they can't figure out how to get comfortable. They are just so upset and I am upset because they are upset. I just want to fix this.

Today felt like I was in a fog. I just had to focus on anything besides what was happening. I was mostly successful.

I fell asleep a little easier last night. James did not sleep much at all. Texting me throughout the night. I was startled awake by our Christmas tree falling over in the middle of the night. Scared the bejesus out of me. But I knew I couldn't handle cleaning that up in the dark and would wait until morning.

And in the morning I did my best to deal with it. But I was also very distressed to find that I could only see one of my frogs. I am mortified to share this but it seems that one of the frogs did not survive transport to the new tank. And so Sunnyside is no longer with us. I was heartbroken. On top of everything else, my frog died?? Our Christmas tree is shattered on the ground, broken ornaments everywhere, and here I am holding a dead frog. I didn't even brush my teeth yet.

But there was nothing I could do but clean everything up. I buried Sunnyside in one of our plants. And picked up the tree. Vacuumed up the ornaments that broke. Tried to put everything back together again.

James thought they would be released by noon. Which was much earlier then I had thought. I was both excited and nervous.

But it would actually take a lot longer.

James encouraged me to still go to the museum as planned to work on printing Christmas cards.

So I got dressed. I ate two handfuls of cereal. And I went to the museum.

I had texted Jessica but Mike still seemed really surprised to see me. I think everyone was. I just needed to be distracted. I would spend the next three hours just playing with the Christmas stamps. Having a lot of trouble with my water inks, switching to the oil inks half way through the morning. I would talk to Jessica and Auni and Beth. They want to help so much. I don't know how they can right now. But I appreciate them offering. Beth specifically offered to carpool with James to take some of the stress off of me once they can come back to work. And that won't be necessary all the time but it is appropriated none the less.

I would make some compositions I really liked. I had wanted to do more but I was struggling so I was glad at least the ones I chose in the end worked out. And besides some finger prints, I think they look awesome. It was a good distraction to have.

I was texting James the whole time. Checking in. Seeing how they were feeling. When they thought I could come get them. But they learned they had another IV of antibiotics so it would be a while longer.

But that was fine. I spent another hour doing the actual cards. I did half of the whole batch me and Paula talked about. I was exhausted. And hungry. I had been talking to guests the whole time I was working too so I was just a little burnt out.

I checked in with Kristen at the desk. She hoped James would be okay. I did too.

James said they were starting the IV and I could come in about 2 hours. To go get something to eat. So I drove out to Glen Burnie and got taco bell. Which was good but messy. I mostly just wanted to go be with James's.

I went across the street to look at the thrift store and ended up scoring some great Christmas gifts. At prices that made me think they didn't know what they had. I also got a beautiful dress I did not need but am excited about.

I texted James I was heading to them next. And that ended up being a good time. I was about a half hour away. And when I got there I got a much closer parking spot. I was very surprised no one stopped me once I got in the hospital. I just took the elevator up and went right to James's room.

And I was so glad to see them. But the energy was for sure different today. I was more scared of hurting them. They were so tired. We both just wanted to go home.

It would still be a while. We had to wait for a nurse to come and disconnect them. Then for discharge papers. We would need a transporter. And then we had to go to the pharmacy.

This would take what felt like hours. And what was really just under 2 hours from the moment I got there.

I brought James comfy clothes. And helped them get dressed. I am so afraid of hurting them. Josseling them or bumping them. If I really wanted to be introspective about it I'm really afraid of accidentally hurting them and then yelling at me. They have never yelled at me. Not once. But my ex did. And once they were injured and I bumped them and they freaked out at me. And so now I am very afraid of that even if it's unfounded.

James just keeps apologizing and telling me it's not fair I have to deal with them. And that makes me feel terrible. Because I signed up to take care of them!! It was in my vows!!! I love them so much and I just hate seeing them so uncomfortable and in so much pain. Physically and emotionally.

I was thrilled when we could finally go home though. The nurses said goodbye, we invited them to the museum. And then James was wheeled downstairs.

We stopped at the pharmacy. Where I realized I left James's wallet at home. But they let me use my id so it was okay and we got the stuff James needed.

We would stop at the grocery store before we went home. I was very uncomfortable driving because James was getting rattled and gasping at every bump. Which made me more sure about us not traveling tomorrow. I also made James stay in the car while I went in.

I got milk and some stuff for corn bread tomorrow. And then we went home.

I was glad to see Waffle the frog swimming around. No eyes on Omelet but that doesn't mean much. Sweetp was glad to see us.

I have been very unsure all night though. James is obviously in pain. We are trying our best to deal. I did some organizing in our room and took a shower. James built with Legos for a bit. I had set up the couch for them to sleep but after a while they were basically weeping and so we have moved them to the bed. But it's not going much better. Apparently they slept for a little in a recliner but we don't have something like that and so I put a bunch of pillow behind them but it's not working and I'm not sure what to do. I hate this for them. I just want them to be able to rest.

I just moved our butterfly chair to the bedroom and we are trying that. They keep falling asleep for a moment. Lightly snoring. And then waking up and being in terrible pain and I just hate this so so much. I have an alarm set for their next pain meds but I'm also worried about that. I want them to be comfortable but I also don't want to mess with powerful medications you know?

I am just glad they are home. I don't know if I will sleep much. I just want to watch them.

Wish us luck everyone. Sleep good and be safe.

[a9saga]

not to be dramatic but [puts the gazette's tokyo shinjuu on the aux]

[eddie-van-munson]

Lightning Bolts (Eddie Munson x Reader)

Summary: (Hurt/Comfort) You haven't touched Eddie since he came home from the hospital. He assumes it's because you're disgusted by the way he looks, covered in scars from the Upside Down, but that couldn't be further from the truth. In reality, you're just afraid of losing him again.

Warnings: Smut, Hurt/Comfort, Medical Triggers, Eddie has Scars from the Demobat Attack and Dislikes Them, Anxiety/PTSD, Talk of Death, Series Typical Violence, Spoilers, Cursing.

Requested by: @mazzeeeliz (a fic inspired by the song "A Love Like Ours" by Aron Wright). I found most of my inspiration from the line, "This isn't the end, It's only a season. A love like ours will never die." This fic is kind of all over the place though jdbfnd I'm so sorry.

(Medical Triggers: Eddie is in the Hospital after the Demobat attack. Non-Descript Mentions of Wounds, Injections, Blood etc.)

***********

"Why's it-? Hurts... hurts. It's...Fuck..."

Eddie's head wasn't there yet when his eyes finally opened. He couldn't get many words out, just a mumbled assortment of curses, whimpers, and slurred questions. His dark brows were furrowed with confusion as he weakly tried to pull the IV from his arm and tug his bandages off. He struggled against Steve pitifully when he reached out to stop him, his mind still disoriented and half asleep, but he was too frail to fight it. Your throat tightened at the sight of fear clouding in his eyes. You didn't like it. Not at all.

You'd been so desperate to see those pretty brown eyes open again. You'd wanted to hear his voice.

But now they were open, and when you searched for any sort of coherence or recognition in them, there was nothing.

He was speaking, but no words were there. Only croaked sobs and hoarse indications of pain.

Eddie wasn't awake yet. Not really. You almost wished he was asleep again, if only so he wouldn't hurt. He wouldn't be afraid.

You took his hand in yours as you stood beside him, Steve holding his other one to keep him from hurting himself. You hushed him softly as tears filled his big dark eyes, reaching up to feel his head. He was still warm from infection, but he was better. "It's ok, baby. You're safe. Just relax." You hummed as his breathing slowed. "There we go...that's it."

You dragged your fingertip over his face soothingly, tracing around his forehead and down across his nose. He calmed, staring up at you as you traced his cupid's bow and around his jaw.

"I know you're afraid, sweetheart. You don't know where you are, do you? Or why you're hurting..." You cooed to him gently. "You probably don't even know who we are, yet. But we're going to make it feel better, ok? Just gotta relax, for me."

He eased as you stroked his hair, running your fingers through his tangled curls. Some of the fear faded from his expression, leaving fogginess in his drug blown pupils. You brushed a tear from his cheek.

"Are you hurting bad?" You kept your voice steady and calm, holding his gaze. He gave a  dizzy nod. "Ok, angel. We'll find you some more medicine."

You hadn't been able to take him to the hospital. There'd been a hundred reasons why, the least of which being that he immediately would have been arrested for three counts of murder. He'd be sent to prison as soon as he healed. That is, if he healed. Small town doctors and nurses weren't exactly trained on procedures related to inter-dimensional bat maulings.

Instead, you took him to the lab, praying the whole way that there was something they could do. That you'd make it in time.

He'd been unconscious for days, his torn body pumped with drugs to keep him asleep and stable. They'd given him an emergency blood transfusion, and it was the longest 12 hours of your life. You paced the hallway, waiting. Waiting to see if his body would accept the transfusion. Waiting to see if they could knit him back together. Waiting to see if he'd live through the night.

You sobbed in relief when they said he was stable enough for you to see him. They'd decided put him under, which was dangerous in the state he was in, but it had to be done. It would have been cruel to risk him waking up like this, and he needed to be kept still and at rest to aid him in healing.

It'd been a few days, now, and Owens was starting to transition him off of the general anesthetic. He'd warned you it would take him a while to get his head back, if it came back at all. There was a possibility it wouldn't after that kind of physical trauma. You didn't let yourself even consider that possibility.

He was under sedation still, but it was more to keep his muscles relaxed and ease him awake. Even though he was conscious, he wouldn't remember. He was stuck in between sleep and awake. Owens called it "twilight".

You could see him thinking, his tired eyes searching your face and the room as if it were a puzzle to solve. He stared at you, brow furrowed like it was on the tip of his tongue, but he couldn't quite make the connection. You held his hand for a long time, soothing him as tears rolled down his flushed cheeks.

"Y/N." It was practically a whisper. His voice was hoarse, but it was there.

The relief that spread over you was like a warm, sweet tidal wave. "That's right, baby. You starting to come back to us?"

Steve stood when he heard him speak, only to return a moment later with a glass of water. Eddie stared up at him as you gave a soft 'thanks', studying his friend in quiet confusion. Steve smiled, giving him a little wave. "Hey, man."

Eddie's paused, his expression relaxing, and swallowed thickly. You could have cried when he spoke, again. His voice was so small and pitiful, "Hey."

He sounded like a scared little boy.

His sweet, sleepy brown eyes found yours again, and you frowned, grazing your thumb along his chapped lips protectively. "You want some water, baby?"

He took a moment to process, but gave a slow nod, his hand coming up to reach for the glass.  You held it for him, helping him take slow sips.

"Y/N..." He murmured, squirming weakly in his sheets. "Hurts."

"I know, sweet boy. It'll feel better soon, I promise." You glanced to Steve and he nodded, leaving to get the nurses. Eddie whined softly and glanced around, as if he was trying to find what was causing the pain.

For the first time, he saw himself. Really saw himself. He was covered in bandages, countless lines of stitches scattering over the few parts of him he could see. The bites. You watched his eyes as he realized the state he was in, a few pieces of the puzzle clicking into place. Immediately his breathing started to quicken with panic. A sob escaped his throat, his hand trembling where you held it, and he gave you a panicked look.

"I've got you, Eds. It's ok..."

His lower lip quivered when he exhaled, tears welling over and rolling down his cheeks. He scrunched his face uncomfortably, voice cracking. "Hurts...it hurts."

 "Hey..." You fought your own tears as you cradled his chin, making him look up at you. His pulse sped as you guided him in slow breaths. "They're coming to fix it, baby. I've got you."

"Make me go to sleep. Please. Please make me sleep." His voice was rough. He squeezed your hand, giving another little sob. "I don't want to look at it."

Your lip quivered as you held his face in your hands, trying to keep him from upsetting himself further. His beautiful brown eyes were so full of pain it made you feel ill. You choked pitifully, "I love you so much, Eds. I'm sorry. I'm...I'm so sorry." 

The door opened. Steve and the nurse.

"What's wrong?" Steve took one of Eddie's hands, trying to relax him. You couldn't answer. Vaguely, you could hear the nurse talking to Steve. He's panicking. You brushed the tears from his cheeks as you watched the nurse prepare a sedative from the corner of your eye. It's better to put him back to sleep. His heart rate is getting too high. Steve flashed you a concerned look as he reached out to take hold of Eddie's bicep. Can you keep him still for me? Eddie clung to Steve's forearm where he held him, inhaling sharply at the injection. He tensed in your arms, and you hushed him sweetly as he went still.

"We've got you, Eds." Steve's brow furrowed as he watched his body sink slowly. "That's it."

You cradled him against you as you watched his eyes finally go empty, his head lulling back. Slowly, you let him go, allowing his body to fully relax into the mattress before immediately breaking into sobs. Steve rushed to you, pulling you into a tight hug, but the words still echoed in your head.

It hurts. Make me go to sleep. I don't want to look at it.

***********

Months Later

Eddie was desperate to be touched. He ached for it.

He'd healed. His stitches had come out, leaving hundreds of scars. The bites were hardly visible to anyone but himself now, but the larger wounds on his ribs and chest were dark and un-ignorable. And they always would be.

Eddie hated them. He hated every last one of them. He hated the memories they gave him of blinding pain and the feeling of blood soaking his clothes. But more than that, he hated how they looked.

He knew it sounded stupid. Vain, even. But he'd never been very happy with his appearance in the first place. He'd learned to live with his looks Sophomore year, when he'd grown his hair out, but he'd never liked his face or his body. He was always too lanky. Too pasty. Too thin in some places and too soft in others. Too many acne scars and stretch marks.

But now? He'd kill to look the way he used to. It made him sick to think he'd ever complained about it in the first place, because you hadn't touched him since he left that lab.

The government had pulled some strings, airing news stories all over Hawkins.

Man Found with Murder Weapon: A Breakthrough for The Cunningham Case

Finally Behind Bars! Hawkins Breathes a Sigh of Relief!

Justice is Served in Local Murder Cases

They gave a name and a picture, some guy no one had ever seen before, and that was that. The town was appeased and no one really went to jail. No more Munson Murders.

Still, Eddie stayed inside with you at the apartment you shared, too sickened by the idea of stares. It was a new feeling for him. He'd always welcomed the stares. He couldn't, anymore.

He'd been out once. He went to the grocery store down the street for cigarettes and milk. A little girl stared at him in the grocery isle, and he didn't think much of it at first. Kids stared at him a lot. They thought his clothes were funny. He smiled at her, giving her a little wave. Without warning, her eyes went wide, terror filling them when she realized he was looking at her. Tears welled in her big baby blues as she broke into cries at the sight of him, hiding her face in her mother's leg. Her mother looked over, picking her daughter up and soothing her as she mouthed an apology.

He hadn't left the house since. Every time he thought he could, he imagined those big blue eyes filling with tears.

You took care of him, though. You were patient. You listened. You let him cry. A lot. But you didn't touch him.

You'd only hold him in your sleep, rolling over and wrapping your arms around him tightly as you murmured nonsense. It was heaven, every time. He waited so patiently for you to fall asleep each night so he could pull you into his arms and feel your skin, warm against his.

The only time you still wanted him was when your eyes were closed. He tried not to let that hurt his feelings. He didn't blame you.

Today marked another month. Eddie didn't want the alarm to go off. He wanted you to stay in his arms, snuggled in against the crook of his neck where you still loved him. Where you still wanted him.

He kissed your forehead, traveling down to your nose, and you curled in closer. He smiled, gathering your locks up off your nape as he laid you down against the mattress. You barely stirred. Slowly, as not to scare you, he nuzzled his face in your neck, letting his hand lace through your hair and cradle your head. His lips were warm and soft as he peppered them over the sensitive skin of your throat. You moaned softly, head tilting back. A hot breath fanned your skin as he breathed a relieved sob, letting his kisses deepen. You hummed his name breathlessly, your fingers lacing in his curls.

He gave a gorgeous sound as you searched for friction against him, needily. He groaned, pushing your baby hairs back off of your forehead as your sleepy eyes fluttered open. Lazily, you slid your palm up his chest and over his throat, gazing your thumb over his cheek as you pulled him down into a kiss. He felt like he was going to pass out, he was in such bliss. You were warm and gentle with him, and you'd just found his soft spot right below his ear when your kisses slowed to a stop. A scar. It was tiny, just two faint spots from the fangs of a bat, but it was there. Your stomach went cold.

 It hurts. Make me go to sleep. I don't want to look at it.

Suddenly, your skin felt icy. You were looking into his pained eyes, watching him beg you to be put under. You were putting pressure against his shoulder, praying and sobbing as he choked on his own blood. You were outside the trailer, watching him be shredded by a million bats. Hearing him scream.

You tensed, and Eddie immediately stopped, pulling back. He looked you over, concern furrowing his brow, "What's wrong? What happened? Are you hurt?"

"No...no I'm..." You pulled your shirt on, and the mattress dipped as you stood, headed towards the closet. "I'm late for work."

He frowned, glancing towards the alarm clock. It hadn't even gone off yet. "Babe, you've still got an hour before you've got to leave."

You blanched, fumbling for an answer as you hit a button the alarm clock, cancelling it. "I know I just...um...I wanted to get there early. There's some stuff that needs done.

He wanted to cry. "Y/N..."

You turned to him, your heart aching when you saw the look on his face.

"I need you talk to me." His shoulders were slumped, his arms wrapped around himself where he sat in bed. "I feel like you've got a million things going on in your head lately and I don't have any idea what a single one of them is."

He looked so small. So insecure and hurt. You sat in front of him, taking his hand in your own as you tucked one of his curls behind his ear.

"I just..." You took a shaky breath. "I don't think we should do anything too physical yet, Eds. You're still healing."

"I need you to touch me." He croaked, tears stinging his nose. "I need it. And if you don't want to touch me, I understand that. I know you didn't sign up to be with Freddie Kruger, but I need you to tell me that if that's the case. I can't keep holding out hope that you'll want me again."

You shook your head, your stomach knotting sickly as your jaw dropped, "Eddie no...God no, Eddie. That's not it. That's not it at all. I-...I don't want to hurt you, baby."

"I'm healed. I've...I've been stitched up. Everything is closed and strong, again. Owens said." He sniffled, rubbing at his tear stained cheeks. "I...I need you. If you still want me, then I need you. I need you to hug me after work again. I need you to kiss me goodnight and make love to me. I need you to hold me on the couch when we watch movies. I need things to be normal because I don't...I don't feel human anymore."

"Eddie..." Your eyes finally brimmed over as Eddie gave a sob. Trembling, you crawled into his lap. His arms wrapped around you so tight it nearly hurt. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." You bury your head in his shoulder. "I'm afraid. 'm just afraid. I can't bear to see you in anymore pain, Eds."

You'd been distant. You knew you had been. For months you'd longed to touch him, but the fears in your head deterred you from even trying. Every time you found yourself wanting to let your hands wander, your head clouded with thoughts.

What if he reopens a wound? What if his heart can't handle that yet? What if he's in pain but he's too embarrassed to tell me?

You'd been so terrified to hurt him that you hadn't realized you were doing exactly that. Hurting him. You'd been neglecting him for months, all in the name of keeping him safe.  You'd left him thinking you didn't want him. That his body was too marred to be desirable to you.

"Look at me...Look at me." You held his jaw firmly in your hands as his breathing steadied, his warm, glossy brown eyes watching you.  Your thumb grazed over his cheek, "There's not been a moment where I haven't wanted you."

You said it sternly, leaving no room for negotiation. Eddie shook his head, his forehead creasing with confusion. "I don't understand."

You sighed, guiding him to lay his head against your chest. He gave a shakey breath, taking in your body warmth and the feel of your hands in his hair as he listened to your heartbeat.

"They had to restart your heart." You struggled to say it, an ache churning inside you at the memory of his body jolting under the charged paddles. "They had to pump you full of drugs and keep you asleep...You were so fragile, baby. Never knew if you'd make it through the night..." You held him tighter, comforting yourself. "You could've left me at any moment."

Eddie rubbed your back, sweetly. He clung to you, as if he were trying to protect you from your own memories.

"And when you came to you..." You choked a little, trying to take a deep breath. "Your eyes were so empty at first...and then you were in so much pain. You begged me to make you go to sleep."

Eddie's chest lurched. You'd never told him that, before. He imagined, momentarily, how he'd have felt if it had been you laying in that bed instead of him. He immediately went nauseous.

"I felt like I was torturing you. Keeping you alive with tubes and machines and drugs just because I wanted you to stay. Owens told me the moment he saw you that it might be more humane to let you go...but I couldn't do it, Eddie."

Eddie pulled back to look at you with big sweet eyes.

 "And then you were better and you were home. I didn't want to let myself get used to having you. I felt like the universe was going to play some cruel joke and take you away again. It'd been touch and go for so long. You were so fragile. If something happened...I wouldn't be able to keep going if I lost you again, sweetheart."

You gave a quiet sob as he reached up to brush away your tears.

"I've wanted you so bad for so long, but I'm so scared. I don't want to risk hurting you." You kissed the top of his hair, "I thought if I didn't touch you I couldn't hurt you, but I did. I hurt you so bad, Eddie. Made you feel unwanted. Made you feel like you aren't the most beautiful boy I've ever seen."

"You don't have to say that."

"I'm not saying it because I have to, baby." You rubbed your eyes. "I mean it. I mean it so fucking much."

You were in awe of him as you sat in his lap, his cheeks still pink and his eyelashes stuck together with tears. He pressed a kiss to the pad of your finger as you traced his lips.

Your voice was barely whisper when you spoke again, "Sometimes I wake up before you do, and the sun is just starting to rise...the heat from it turns your nose pink."

He smiled softly, and you can't help but smile too.

"Most of the time you're still dreaming. You talk in your sleep, Eds. Did you know that? You make the sweetest little sounds. The funniest faces."

He watched you as you replayed a memory in your head.

"I could watch you forever like that. Warm and sleepy and happy...God, you're so pretty, angel. You're so pretty. You're perfect. I'll say it a million times a day now, huh? I'm not gonna let you forget it ever again. I've wanted you so bad, sweetheart. You have no idea."

Eddie was breathless, his throat tight. "I'm sorry."

Your brow furrowed, "For what?"

"I should've realized something else was going on." His voice was rocky with emotion. "I love you. I know you. You'd never stop loving me over something like this. I wasn't fair to you. I just..." He bit his lip. "Everything changed between us and when I look in the mirror, I don't like what I see. I just assumed you didn't like it either."

You pulled him close, kissing his forehead and his nose, "Eddie Munson, you could have horns and green skin and I'd still want you. I mean it. You've got me whipped. You could have feathers sprouting out your ass."

His eyes welled as you gave him a sweet kiss. He murmured against your lips, his tightening throat making his words hoarse, "What if it's worse than that?"

You pulled back, crooking your brow, "Worse than feathers sprouting out your ass?"

He laughed softly, wiping tears on the back of his hand as he sniffled. "You haven't had a look at me in a while. I didn't exactly...heal well."

You stroked his hair, looking concerned. "What do you mean by that? Do you still hurt?"

"No. The marks are-"

"The marks? Your scars? Is that what this is about?"

He nodded, swallowing, and gave a humorless laugh. "Like I said. Freddie Kruger."

Your heart sank as he poked fun at himself, trying to cover up his own insecurity. You shook your head, resting against his chest as you toyed with the collar of his shirt. He used to sleep without one, but he'd grown to favor throwing on a Megadeath shirt he'd accidentally gotten a few sizes too big.

"They're such a comfort to me, Eds."

A comfort. What? Eddie's forehead creased as he looked down at you. They usually did the opposite for him.

"How?" His voice was shy, as if he still halfway expected rejection.

"I saw you torn up, Eds. You bled out in my arms. I can't tell you how good it is to see where your body has healed from that."

Oh. Oh. He'd never thought of it like that.

"I have nightmares a lot." You hummed, quietly. "When I wake up scared I can just trace your arms. Look over you." You hold his hand to you, admiring the swirling dips that'd been forever carved into his skin. "I thought some of these would kill you. But you're still here, and all that's left of the hurt is just..." You trailed off, smiling softly as you admired him. "Lightning bolts."

He exhaled, amazed. "Lightning bolts."

"Silver and pink..."  You drew the jagged line  across his forearm, looking up at him. "Can I see the one on your heart?"

You hadn't seen it up close since it had healed. Maybe you'd caught a glimpse or two of it while he changed, but you wanted to touch him. Fear still bubbled in your chest at the idea of your hands on him, but the want in his expression eased it.

He laid back against the pillows, curls mussing as he tugged the large shirt up over his head. Your insides fluttered. You were straddling his hips now, your hands tentatively creeping up over his belly as a warmth settled low in your tummy. "Oh, sweetheart..." 

He was gorgeous. The deep, rosy tear ran right right up to his collarbone, tapering at the ends. The tattoo on his chest had been nearly split in half by it. He stared up at you as you touched him. Admired him. He could see that you liked what you saw. That you wanted it. He could feel it, too.

Heat was starting to pool between your legs where he was pressed against you. It'd been so long. This sweet boy wanted you so bad, and it'd been so long.

"Eddie..." His palms slid up your thighs, giving you a squeeze as they rested there. "Can I tell you something?" You planted your hands on his abdomen.

He nodded, unable to find words. The sensation of your body warmth against his middle was making him feel dizzy and drunk.

"I've missed having you inside me, Eddie." He groaned at your whisper, and your cheeks heated as you sat pressed against his bulge. Your panties were getting damp against his boxers. "Sometimes, I'd lock myself in the bathroom and-"

He bucked weakly against you and you gasped, searching for friction with a few rocks of your hips. His throat went dry. "What did you do, Y/N?"

"Touched myself."

"Jesus baby..."

He thrusted up against you, bouncing you in his lap a little. You gasped at the feeling, biting your lip.

"I did it too." He choked out, trying to catch his breath. "I touched myself, too. Got off when you went to work...Y/N, please. Please touch me. Please."

Your eyes went wide as he begged you.

"We can take it slow, have a safe word just in case, I don't care, but I'm so hard. It hurts..."

It hurts. Make me go to sleep. I don't want to look at it.

You tensed, looking down at your love below you. There he was, beautiful and breathing. And there were his scars. You could feel the roughness of them as you traced your fingertips over his skin. Touching all of the places he'd healed. His pretty brown doe eyes looked up at you pleadingly. You took a deep breath, reeling your mind back in, and sat up on all fours.

Eddie's breath quivered as you nuzzled your face against his cock in his boxers, your hot breath making your name fall from his lips like a prayer. You slipped your fingers into his waistband and pulled them down off of his hips, revealing is painfully red cock. He was visibly throbbing, leaking pre-cum onto his sweet soft tummy with every pulse.

"Fuck Eds. Is this all for me?" Tears rolled down his cheeks as he nodded, whimpering as you kissed up his shaft chastely. "I've been neglecting you, haven't I? Made you hurt so bad. I'm so sorry, angel." 

He reached down for your hand.  You thought he was going to wrap it around his length, but instead he laced your fingers with his, needily. Your heart melted.

"Sweet boy...I'm gonna take such good care of you all day. I'll make you feel so good you forget your own name. Do you think that'll make up for it? Is that a good start?" You sucked one of his swollen balls into your mouth, releasing it with a pop.

His stomach tensed with pleasure, "But-"

"I'll call out of work, Eds. Don't worry about that. I've let my angel forget how pretty he is. I need to remind him. That's all I'm worried about, right now."

He gave a little sob, words breaking, "I love you."

"I love you most, pretty. I love you so much." He squeezed your hand, eyes fluttering shut as his body relaxed. "That's it, sweetheart. Just lay back and let your head go dumb for me. I've got you."

You dipped your free hand between your legs, gathering your slick on your fingers and bringing it back up to his cock. You pumped him a few times, smearing yourself over him before dragging your tongue from his base to his head. Eddie's pretty back arched as his brow furrowed with pleasure. He watched you as you sank your throat down onto him, stroking his base as you bobbed on his length messily.

"Whoa, no no no stop. Holy shit, you've gotta stop."

You froze, pulling off of him so fast as panic settled in your belly. You crawled up him to cradle his face, thumbs stroking his flushed cheeks. "Hey, what's wrong baby? What hurts? Is it too much?"

"No, no 'm ok." He rasped. "I was just..." He trailed off, ears going red.

You smiled softly, "What is it, gorgeous?"

He preened under your praise, his eyes squeezing shut, "I just...I was about to..."

"About to cum?" You brushed his baby hairs back out of his face, fondly.

"Yeah", He gave a pitiful laugh, rubbing his eyes. "Nearly creamed myself. I'm surprised I've made it this long. I feel like a blushing virgin."

You grinned, kissing him as you draped your body over his carefully. "Why'd you stop me? You should've taken what you needed."

"I want to be inside you."

You wiggled your eyebrows at him, "I can wait fifteen minutes, angel."

"I can't." He whined pitifully. "Miss you too bad. I'll let you suck my cock later. I promise."

"Oh you will, huh?" He grinned at that. A real, chesire, Eddie-grin. You giggled in spite of yourself.

"Don't be a brat." He groaned, rubbing his eyes.

"Oh, I'm sorry." You coo, "I forgot that's your job."

He laughed brightly, reaching down to tickle your sides in retaliation. You squirmed, pulling him into a distracting kiss. He hummed against you, pouting. "I'm a brat now? I thought I was your pretty boy?"

You trailed your lips down his throat, his breath growing ragged as you dragged your tongue over the little bat bite. You nipped at his earlobe, sucking it. "Oh sweetheart, of course you are." You punctuated your words with kisses as you worked your way down to suck his collarbone. "My pretty, sweet, perfect little brat."

Sitting up, you straddled his hips again, rocking back and forth for a moment to push your soaked panties down off of your legs. He groaned deep in his chest at the sight of you, and you smiled, taking his hand in yours.

"Close your eyes, for me." He smiled softly, obeying. You inched up his chest, opening his hand and bringing it between your legs.

"Holy shit..." The moan he gave as his fingers slid through you was so pretty you could have cried, "You're so fucking wet." He let himself explore for a moment before you felt the heel of his palm graze your clit, his index and pinkie fingers pressing into the creases of your thighs . His hand pressed flush against your pelvic bone as he slid up into you, his middle finger hooking inwards against a soft spot below your belly.

"Jesus Christ, Eddie." You squeaked, holding his wrist in place as he fucked you with his thick fingers. "Shit, sweetheart. Those bats could've eaten half your fucking brain and you'd still know how to make me cum on these pretty fingers, wouldn't you?"

He laughed, smiling lazily at the praise. Your eyes scrunched, and he could see your stomach starting to tense as he rubbed small, tight circles directly over your g-spot. Your hips bucked into his hand and he bit the tip of his tongue, brows furrowing with focus as you started to clench around him. You pushed down on his wrist, pulling his fingers from inside you.

He whined, frowning as if you'd deprived him of something, "Why'd you do that for?"

You smirked as you caught your breath, watching him bring his fingers into his mouth to suck them clean. "Because..."

You spread your thighs where you straddled him, lowering your cunt enough to slowly glide your heat over the length of his shaft.

His head pulled back with a moan, and you leaned in, kissing his sweet lips. "...I want to cum on this perfect cock."

He pulled you back down into another kiss, a longer one. "I still feel like I'm dreaming." He whispered, his nose burning. "Feel like I'm gonna wake up and you'll be gone, again."

Pain bled through your chest, your eyes going glossy. "That's how I've felt ever since you came to, Eds."

"Well, if this is a dream..." He cradled your face, his nose nuzzled against yours, lovingly. He offered you his pinkie. "Let's just promise each other we won't ever wake up."

A tear brimmed over, and you brushed it away quickly and hooked your little finger with his. "I love you, so much Eddie Munson." He smiled sweetly, his dimples showing. "If you ever die on me again I'm gonna kill you."

The corner of your mouth tugged, "Not if you behave."

He laughed loudly, his head lulling back. He groaned with a smile, squeezing your thighs. "You're half way there, hovering that pretty cunt over my cock like that. So cruel...You gonna make me beg again?"

He exhaled sharply, bucking his hips, desperately as you reached a hand down to stroke him, lining him up at your entrance.

"Y/N L/N..." He murmured gently, his head lulling back.

"What is it, gorgeous?"

"I love you too."

Your stomach fluttered as you sank onto him, and you were unsure if it was because of the words or from the feeling of him splitting you open. Curses fell from his lips as your brow furrowed, a dull ache forming in your tummy. It'd been too long. Much too long.

"Fuck, sweetheart. I'm not gonna last long." He croaked, his eyes rolling back in his head.

"M-Me neither." You whimpered softly, "This is a lot better than your fingers."

He laughed, and you gasped a little, feeling him move inside you. You chased the sensation, rolling your hips on him. He nudged the same tender spot as before with every movement.

"That's it. Ride me, angel...Feels so fucking good." He babbled weakly as you grinded on him, your slick heat smearing over his lower tummy.

You whimpered softly, a tear rolling down your cheek, "Eddie..."

His hands found your hips, knowing you needed more, and lifted you off of him just enough to drop you back down. He thrusted upwards, bouncing you down onto his cock. Your head fell back, your whimpers going choppy with every thrust of his hips.

"That's it, baby. Let me know how good it feels."

You cried out, the lewd sound of wet skin slapping against wet skin filling the room. His hips against your ass. Deep. Deep. Deep. You felt an ache inside you. An itch that needed scratching.

He pulled you down to lay against his chest, and you could feel him throbbing, his hips still thrusting up into you. Your walls tightened around him.

"Ed-d-d-d-ie" Your voice was small and hoarse, your face buried in the crook of his neck. "I'm..."

"That's it, honey. Cum around my cock. Soak me, sweetheart. I've got you."

"I love you, Eds. I love you so much. I'm close I'm cu-- Oh, Oh, Oh..."

Your eyes rolled back in your head as you went limp, every nerve ending in your body frying into warm TV static as you stomach spammed and pulsed around him. You could distantly hear him moaning as he thrusted into you one, two, three more times. He gasped your name hoarsely, clinging to you as you felt his heat fill your belly.

For a long time you laid there, your bodies smeared with a million different kinds of sin. Neither of you would let go of one another. Eddie whimpered softly as occasional aftershocks made your muscles twitch around him.

He could feel a sticky mixture of cum and wetness starting to drip down onto his hip from your cunt. You locked eyes as he pulled out, reaching down between you to dip two of his fingers inside you. You squirmed a little, but went still as you watched him bring his fingers back up to show you. He hummed softly as he spread them, sticky, glistening strings forming between his coated didgets. He made eye contact as he brought them into his mouth, sucking his fingers clean.

You scrunched your nose, "You're nasty."

Eddie burst into loud laughter grinning, as he rubbed your thighs. He gave a fond hum,  "Nah, baby. We taste good together."

You stared up at him. He could tell he'd made you curious. He crooked his finger and you moved closer, letting him pull you into a dirty, messy kiss. You moaned as your tongue grazed his, and you tasted yourself on him. A thin string of saliva and cum stuck between you when you parted, breaking when you licked your lips. He giggled, gathering some from your chin onto his thumb and letting you kiss it from the pad of his finger.

He gave an wicked grin, "Now you're nasty too."

You rolled your eyes, pressing little kisses to a few of the scars on his chest. Eddie's heart melted as you nuzzled against the marks on his chest, resting your head there. You were quiet for a long time, just enjoying touch again.

"I love you so much." You cooed so softly. He could tell just from your voice that you were falling asleep. "I think you're so beautiful." 

He smiled, cradling your face. "I know you do, baby." He tapped his fingertip on your nose. "I'm sorry I forgot."

"I'm sorry I let you forget."

Your forehead creased with guilt but he tutted, rubbing the furrow from your brow with his thumb. "No no no...that's enough of that. I simply cannot allow you to look so sad after I've just fucked your brains out. It would ruin my reputation."

You fought a laugh, but lost out. "You're such an asshole. I was trying to be sweet."

He grinned, humming. "You're always sweet."

"Is that a problem?" You played with his curls, passively.

 "A huge problem, actually. Wish you'd knock me around a little. Put me in my place, you know? Call me your little slut?"

You smirked, "You'd cry like a baby."

He laughed, sighing. "Definitely." He rolled you over, tucking his head into the crook of your shoulder to press kisses along your jaw. "Can't help it though. I like being your pretty boy."

"Aw..." You teased, "Sweet little thing. You like being my pillow princess don't you?"

He hums a yes without processing the words, but quickly pulls back to look at you, frowning, "Hey!"

You broke into laughter as he pinched at your sides again, making you giggle and squirm.

You stayed in bed with him all day, only getting up to throw on some clothes frantically and open the door for the pizza delivery guy. You watched scary movies and laughed until you snorted and ate way too much.

And just like that, something in you started to heal. Something that had been painful and jagged.

It would take time to fix it completely. There would still be tears and nightmares, but you knew that soon enough it'd knit itself back together, leaving you with those same pink and silver lightning bolts over your heart that Eddie had.

Proof that both of you had lived through that terrible night. And you'd both healed.

***********

@eddielives1986

[kusaka6e]

TUTOR

three | four | five

chapter list

———

the next day, you drive over to see your brother after your morning lectures, the cold winter air cutting through your clothes as you approach the entrance

you pull a mask over the bottom half of your face as you enter the building, thankful to be out of the cold.

"hey (l/n)! how are you?" the charge nurse waves from her desk, eyes crinkling into a smile from underneath her mask.

"hi suni, good to see you again."

you make your usual route down the hall, knocking gently when you reach the door.

"hey bub, you awake?"

"hi sissy." he paused his switch, smiling at you from his bed. you sigh, seeing the multiple bags of fluids on his iv pump.

"how come you're hooked up to so much stuff today?"

"the nurse said my platelets went down last night, so they're giving me more today." you nod, trying your best to not let any negative emotion show.

"i brought you something. the book store on campus got more in a couple days ago." you unzip your backpack and produce the next few volumes of a shounen manga your brother had been raving about.

"no way!! thank you!" he smiles brightly, wrapping his small arms around your torso. as you hug him back, you feel how much thinner he's gotten and internally sigh.

"do you like your nurses this time?"

"they're really nice! i don't remember her name, but the one from a few nights ago helped me get vending machine snacks." he's smiling brightly and talking with so much enthusiasm, you almost forget why you're there.

you stay for a couple of hours, playing games on his switch and talking to each other about schoolwork and other random things until he falls asleep.

as your packing up your things, there's a soft knock on the door.

"oh, hi (l/n)! i was just coming to check on him, you guys need anything?" one of the nurses you'd seen before whispers as she comes in

"no thank you, i'm just about to head out. can i ask you a couple questions?"

"of course." she nods away from the room, gently closing the door before facing you.

"is there any update on the waitlist thing?"

"because of his age, he's been made a priority patient on the waitlist; which is great! but, he's taking to this round of treatment fairly well. it has been tiring him out but the tumor isn't growing and there aren't any new ones."

"that's so great, thank you. and, thank everybody here from me, you all have been so wonderful."

"we're happy to help. you take care of yourself too honey, we'll see you next time." you give her a small wave before heading back to your car.

you glance up at your dashboard, cursing when you see '4:18' written on the clock. if you hurry, you'd only be a couple minutes late.

at 4:29 you fly into a parking space, throwing your car into park as you sling your backpack over your shoulder.

thankfully, baji is sitting at the same table you two were at yesterday, so it's not hard to find him once you enter the library.

"what was that you said yesterday about making an entrance?"

you glare at baji as you pull your notebook and a stack of paper from your backpack, brushing your hair out of your eyes. his hair is pulled into a bun, some baby hairs falling around his face.

"didn’t wanna be late." he grins, hearing the same words he said to you yesterday.

"i was looking at the notes you wrote me yesterday and i got confused."

"about?" you were greatful for baji not picking up on how stressed you were, or at least wasn't saying anything about it.

"how to get answers with this avo... ago... avor?"

"spit it out already." you giggle, his face twisted in focus.

"av... avocado's number. i don't know how to use it."

"avogadro's number. let me see the problems."

he noticed you looked stressed, different from your usual collected demeanor. given, this was only the second day he'd actually spent time with you. but, whenever he saw you with mikey or on campus, you always came off unbothered and put together.

"okay, we're gonna do some practice problems. you gotta know this to be good at stoichometry."

"stoich-y what?! i thought this was chemistry!"

"stoichometry is a part of chemistry, dipshit. it's just a fancy way to say dimensional analysis."

"that already sounds fancy, don't make it even more complicated."

"shut up and do the problem."

just like the day before, it takes him awhile, but all the problems get done without any mistakes after a number of tries and a multitude of questions.

"no celebration routine today?"

"not until i don't need your help with anything, remember?" he doesn't look up from having his head tossed back in exhaustion, long eyelashes fanning towards his eyebrows. you let out a small smile, surprised he remembered what you said.

am i blushing ?? ew

"well we've got a ways to go, but you're not doing too terrible."

"wow, thanks for the encouragement." he chuckles, lifting his head to look at you.

"i've gotta go but i'll see you next time, text me when you wanna meet up again."

"bye (l/n)." his eyes stay on you as you exit the library, sighing.

....

"what's got you quiet?" chifuyu raised an eyebrow at baji, lighting the joint in his hand.

"grades. chemistry sucks."

"how's that tutor mikey found for you?" he notices baji tense, smirking.

"she's really smart."

"and...?"

"and what?"

"is she hot?"

baji's lack of an answer makes matsuno laugh, letting a puff of smoke exit his lips.

"so, when are you gonna ask her out?"

"dude!"

"you're not? why don't you give me her number then?"

"i'm not giving you her number!" baji glares at him, jealously kicking in before he can try to keep it under wraps.

"i'm just fucking with you, i'm not gonna mess with her."

"it's not like she'd hang out with me other than tutoring."

"what makes you say that?"

"because she's so like.... together . she never seems stressed or mad, or sad, or anything."

"so? mitsuya comes off that way too, look how quick he is to knock someone out. i don't think you know her well enough to say that yet."

baji sighs, holding his hand out to chifuyu and taking a drag from the blunt.

"i guess it can't hurt to try, right?"

[koi-bysunset]

hi! first, i want to say that your post about touch-ups on toasty’s hair has been living in my brain all day, i love it so much <333

what about a scenario where xyx takes you on his bike to one of his favourite locations? :)

signing as anon bc i’m not brave

- 🦎

HELLO YES I KNOW YOU IVE SEEN YOUR ASKS AROUND!!! HI!! THANK YOU SO MUCH OH MY GOD IM ON MY KNEES BRO

i know i said i’ll answer this during the weekend, but i couldn’t help myself. i hope u like this just as much as my other stuff!

(wherein xyx takes you for a morning outside.)

today you've learned to be careful of what you wish for.

you've always hinted at wanting to be taken to xyx' favorite place. sure, you've learned not to push things too far when it comes to him, but it still remains at the back of your mind, never failing in making itself known every few days. after all, for a man who's travelled most of the world, his favorite place would have to be pretty special. oh, regret.

you wake up to a warm breeze on your face--too warm. you lift your hand up to shield yourself from it, and the wind comes forth with a voice. "come on, love. time to get up."

"wh..." you open your eyes--they're crusted together, oh god--and see xyx's face over yours, lips pursed and ready to blow air on your face again to wake you up. "huh?"

"get ready, we're leaving in 10 minutes." you feel his lips press on your cheek. "where are we going?" your voice is hoarse and you can barely see past the sleepy haze, but you start to get up anyway. a soft green light catches your eye and you look at it: the clock reads 4:00AM. "xyx what the fuck."

"as much as i love watching you sleep, i'm taking you somewhere."

"uh, okay? where?"

"somewhere special." you feel the bed dip as he leans in to give you a kiss. "this is going to be worth it, love. i promise." your mind clears a little bit as you decide to humor him and make your way over to the bathroom to make yourself look less like a sleepy disaster. you do the bare minimum: wash your face, brush your teeth, comb out your hair with your fingers. you take a second to look at yourself in the mirror and decide to put on a little bit of perfume.

xyx waits for you outside, leaning on his motorbike. "took you long enough."

"oh i'm sorry, it's kind of hard to get my ass up when the birds aren't even awake yet." he only chuckles in reply and swings his leg over his bike. "get in, we don't have all day."

"i'm pretty sure we do when it's this early." he only gives you a look. "doll. behave." 

that's surely one way to shut you up.

you oblige him and ride the bike, going behind him and wrapping your arms around his waist. "all good, love?" you nod against his back, still reeling from his last comment. he revs the engine and you're off.

if you weren't awake then, you're certainly awake now. you've never really gotten used to riding with xyx, at least not yet. he drives with a unique intensity, like he's always racing someone even if there's nobody else there. like he's running away from something. hair whipping in the wind and air whistling on your ears, he drives and brakes and speeds and all you can do is hold on to him like your life depended on it, because oftentimes it does.

you race through traffic, passing the city to the residential areas, then the open highway, ending up going through a dirt road. xyx goes slower now, swerving to avoid chunks of rock and hardened soil. eventually you come to a closed fence, overrun with weeds and crawling vines. "we're here, love." you can feel his voice vibrate through his back. "are you alright?"

"yeah, just a little winded. that was a long ride. what was that, one hour?" he gently taps your hand to let you know it's time to get off. "one and a half hours, actually." you get off and so does he, and he pushes the motorbike up to the chain linked fence. you see him yank on something repeatedly, and the gate announces its opening with a loud creak. he goes in without another word, and of course you follow.

the gate seems to entrap a small jungle. grass covers every inch of the ground, save for a few cracked and mossy slabs of cement to serve as footpaths. you look to the right and see what seems to be a ticket booth covered in moss and dirt. you see bushes, trees, defunct lamp posts wrapped in vines. the place seemed to be abandoned for years, if not decades.

xyx seems to feel your curiosity. "this place was once a botanical garden," he starts to explain. "it was supposed to be for the students at the community college just behind this. the college ran out of money, and they had to shut everything down." you walk on a canopy of dried leaves and overripe fruit. "nobody bothered to clean up the mess to put it back on the market, so i bought it and left it this way."

"thank god. by the way you wrestled that gate i thought we were doing a little B&E this morning." he laughs loudly. "did you really? that's adorable." he looks back at you. "don't worry doll, i'll represent both of us if it comes to it." you just roll your eyes at him in response. "we're here." he kicks the stand for the motorcycle and leaves it aside.

it's just now that you notice he brought his work satchel with him. "what's that for?"

"you'll see."

"but i want to see it now." he clicks his tongue. "tsk, tsk. what did i say about behaving?" he winks. "anyway, we're here. just a few steps left, doll."

you hear it before you see it: running water. xyx pushes aside a few branches and you see a staircase leading down to a small waterfall. the water is clear and the rocks are smooth with years of continuous erosion, and you can see there are stumps and slabs of concrete built as a makeshift picnic table. you gasp. "xyx... wow." he's already gone down a few steps, and he's reaching out to you. "be careful my love, you might slip. hold on to me, yeah?"

the two of you go down the stairs, and he puts down the satchel on the table. "beautiful, isn't it?" he points to the direction opposite the waterfall. "the sun rises on that side." he starts taking out several plastic tubs filled with food, and it hits you: a sunrise picnic. "xyx." he ignores you. "xyx."

"you asked me once about taking you to my favorite spot and i just." he pauses as he opens the lids of the containers. toast, tomatoes, eggs, avocado, insulated mugs for coffee. "i know you think about it, sometimes. you don't say it but i can feel it." he looks at you. "i was just afraid i'll fuck it up or you won't like it. i had to convince myself for a while that you haven’t actually seen it yet to even say you don’t like it." you step closer to him and he looks away. "this is the one place i have where everything falls away and sometimes i go here to think about a lot of things--to think about us." 

"nothing bad, i hope." he laughs, soft and vulnerable. you want to reach out to him, but you know he doesn't like to be coddled. "no, no. nothing bad, love. just--ah, can we sit?" you oblige him and you both sit down. he brings out two empty containers and begins dividing the portions. one for you, one for him. "just, you know. general stuff."

you know he isn't done talking, so you wait. "i genuinely didn't think i'd love you like this, you know." his face is tinged pink, and you see the rays of sunlight slowly peeking from behind his head. the morning is still blue, but the warmth reaches out its fingers. "it's been a lifelong fear of mine--being left alone. sometimes i let people in and," he adjusts himself on his seat and grabs a plastic fork to start eating, but instead he just holds it, poised to slice himself a bite but not actually doing it. "i always think that they'll leave one way or another. most times i'm proven right." oh, your heart begins to ache for him, for this self-fulfilling prophesy, this self-fulfilling tragedy, this man who is always left behind, who took up law to make himself see better, pick things apart and choose words in a way that suits him to let people think he's being generous without actually giving anything. your heart aches for this man, your broken lover, smile wielded like a weapon, jokes at the ready like bows and arrows pulled taut, heart locked in a chest in a secret room, only allowing the briefest of glimpses. 

his face is open, so open to you, you're the only one to see him like this, weapons lowered, gates lifted, guards guiding you to his heart. "sometimes, though," he reaches out to hold your hand. "i'm proven wrong."

you don't know what to say, so you say nothing, you squeeze his hand and fight back tears and hope it's enough, hope that he sees how you're bleeding for him, how you'll give the world to him if he so much as ask. "i've never felt so alive, since you. i always knew what being alive is supposed to feel like, but i've never quite gotten there. no matter how far up i jump, no matter how fast i drive, it's just out of my reach." he exhales a laugh through his nose. "i used to think something was wrong with me, you know." a beat of silence passes. "i mean, something's definitely wrong with me, but--you know what i mean." his voice is softer now, going softer still--barely a whisper above the river's music--and the sun starts to show the top of its head from the horizon. "i used to... i used to think about it a lot, you know. how close i could cut it. how much farther i have to go so i can just feel alive." he picks at his food. "i never thought i would get that feeling just being in a call with you and watching you fuck up tongue twisters."

the laugh that bursts out of you is loud and unexpected. "oh my god you ass, stop ruining the moment, i haven't told you that i love you too." his smile eases. "it's not ruining the moment if it's true, love." he traces circles on your hand with his thumb. "sometimes when we stay in and you get really close to me, i'll start to feel my heart pounding. i-it's ridiculous, really."

you are melting. the sun reveals itself behind xyx and he is bathed in a golden halo of light, heart bare and yours for the taking. "xyx." he is starting to trust again and he chose you to trust just as much as you chose him. you grip his hand tight and try to say all the words you can't because the words 'i love you' sound so simple now. this is more than that. this is lifetimes of devotion and trust and deep caring that consumes, that gives, that hurts and fills and breaks and forms. this is love unprecedented, this is what being alive is like. "i love," you choke because the word is not enough and you're frustrated, dammit, you want him to know everything that he makes you feel and you want to give him your still-beating heart and let him know you are at his mercy. but sure, the word love will do. "i love you. so fucking much."

he smiles back at you, sunlit and sublime, and for a moment you realize that this is something that will stay with you forever. "i love you too." he looks down at the food on the table. "let's eat, shall we? don't want this to get cold, not after i spent hours preparing this." you nod, taking a bite. xyx turns his head back and sees a fully-risen sun. "ah, dammit. missed the sunrise." you smile to yourself. you got to see the sunrise, and he was the most beautiful thing you've ever seen that morning.

[rogue-durin-16]

THINGS NEVER GO AS PLANNED (Part I/VII)

"sleepless nights"

Summary: After Fred's death, George and Y/n lean on each other to carry on. This wasn't the most brilliant idea, though; George was pretty much in love with the girl, and Y/n— well, she had been dating Fred prior to the Battle of Hogwarts.

Pairing: George Weasley x Reader

Genre: angst

Tags:

Suggested by: @crispykittywitch

Things never go as planned: @sarcasticallywitty15 @beautyschoo1dropout @s1ut4georgeweasley @leovaldez37 @missmulti @weasleywh0r3s

Permanent taglist: @elia-the-bibliophile @randomparanoid @karlthecat15722 @thebutchersdaughtersblog

Warnings: grief, nightmares, implicit PTSD

A/N: this is kind of... Fluffy(?) Somehow lmao. This story is based off this convo and these headcanons. If you wanna be tagged in the next parts tell me, and enjoy <3

Prologue: the aftermath

Part II: candy floss

Part III: shock therapy

Part IV: wrong name

Part V: the perfect excuse

Part VI: the downfall

Part VII: apart

Epilogue: I still love you

Rogue-durin-16 masterlist

The first night I thought I was hallucinating; it wouldn't be the first time since the Battle that I had imagined someone was wandering around the flat.

The second night I was dubious.

The third night I was completely sure George was, in fact, staying awake.

So, when, during the fourth night, I heard him pass by my door for the nth time in two hours, I left the comfort of my soft blankets and stepped towards the door.

"What on earth are you doing?" George, who was already walking away in the living room's direction, jumped at my whispering.

He took a hand to his chest, shut his eyes and breathed deeply. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack, woman?" He leaned against the wall, his eyes still closed.

"Alright, sorry." I apologised. We kept whispering as if someone was sleeping in our house. "It's just— are you getting any sleep?"

His brown eyes finally opened, and as he stared into mines, I knew he, despite wanting to do so, couldn't find the strength to lie.

"I can't go near my room." He confessed, one of his hands running through his locks as his eyes welled up. "I— I tried, I just—" another deep breath, this one shaky.

I reached out to him from my door frame. The hallway wasn't that large, anyway; he only needed to slightly extend his arm and he would be able to touch my fingertips.

George looked at my palm hesitant, as if he didn't dare to hold it. "C'mon, I can't have you haunting our home for another night." With a resigned sigh, he finally took my hand, and I swiftly tugged him towards me, leading him into my room and closing the door behind us.

My dorm had a different atmosphere, and George felt it right away. Maybe it was because the room was certainly not the twins' making, or maybe because it was the furthest from Fred's, but in my room the air was less oppressive; it somehow felt comforting and homely.

I sat George down on the edge of my bed and took a proper look at him; his eyes were puffy and his nose red, but he was livid. I let my hand travel to his cheek, and he unconsciously leaned on it.

"I'm gonna go for a glass of water." I informed him, my fingertips wiping a tear that had spilled and was running down his face. "And I'll get your bags on my way."

"You don't have to." He muttered.

"Yeah, I have to, because you're not sleeping on this." I tugged on his overused shirt's collar. "Do me a favor; get a blanket from under the bed and place it on the divan." He nodded and complied, getting up as soon as I left the room.

GEORGE'S P. O. V.

I rubbed my eyes with my index finger and thumb whilst standing up and doing as Y/n had asked me to.

On the process of covering the divan with one of her soft, warm blankets, I realized there was no way on earth I would fit there.

"Why the puzzled look?" Y/n's voice breaking the silence so abruptly made me lost my train of thoughts. "Didn't mean to scare you." She apologised, handing me the promised —and very needed— glass of water, and throwing my bags over her bed. "You're not sleeping there." She clarified, motioning at the divan.

A frown formed on my face. "I'm not taking your bed."

"Yes, you are." Just as I was about to open my mouth and complain, she warned me, "Don't you argue with me, Weasley. We're both too tired for this."

"Alright, you win." I huffed, knowing it would be useless to try and talk some sense into her, and, in all honesty, I craved to lie down on a bed, and Y/n's looked so comfy and welcoming.

"What are you doing?"

"Going to bed?"

She walked to me tugging my hand so I was facing her instead of her mattress. "You're a mess." The girl mumbled under her breath, unbuttoning my shirt before I knew what was happening. "Off, now."

When she stepped away to reach into my bag, I kept doing what she had started until the piece of clothing was open. Y/n placed my pyjamas in front of me and quickly turned her back to my body before I could even remove my shirt.

"I really don't know why you keep doing that" the words were coming out of my mouth somehow more light-hearted, almost amused. "You've ran into me naked several times." I pointed out, completely undressed and reaching for my nightwear.

Y/n snorted. "That doesn't make it any less awkward." The ghost of a grin appeared on my face and I had to refrain myself from teasing her in any way. "Done?" I responded affirmatively un response and she turned around and removed my dirty clothes from her bed.

We both climbed into our respective resting places and threw our blankets over us before turning off the light.

"Y/n?" She gave me a sleepy hum, prompting me to speak. "Thank you." She mumbled something I didn't quite understand; my eyes closed surprisingly fast, and I fell asleep.

Something I was quickly regretting.

As comfortable as Y/n's bed was, and as much at ease as the atmosphere in her room had left me, the nightmares still haunted my dreams.

I jumped up with a yell I didn't know that had escaped my lips, sweating and panting, only to find Y/n close to the same state, somehow a little bit more calmed. We locked eyes, gleaming at the moonlight due to the not yet spilled tears.

I took a deep, ragged breath, and rubbed my face with both hands; I wasn't crying, I was just exhausted.

The weight on the bed shifted before Y/n's arms pulled me into a side hug; I leaned on her, throwing my own arm around her waist to pull her even closer. We fell over the bed like that, and didn't dare to move.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

I woke up again. This time, though, no pants or tears were involved; I was calm and rested, something not very usual anymore.

After a moment, I realized the reason why I had woken up was probably the pain on the back of my neck. I blinked a couple of times in an attempt to shake the drowsiness off me before trying to switch my posture to one more comfortable.

I was then startled by a sleepy grunt that left Y/n's lips; I remembered then that we had somehow managed to fall asleep in each other's arms in the most uncomfortable position ever.

I managed to move her with me, without waking her up —and thank Godric for that, because the sight of her snuggled up to my side with our legs tangled and her hand on my chest was angelic.

A sigh escaped my lips when, due to the rays of sunshine that started to sneak into the room, she buried her face in the crook of my neck, hear breath fanning over my skin and sending chills down my spine.

Staring at the room's ceiling, I weighed my options; on the one hand, I could lay with Y/n a bit more and try to go back to sleep, but I risked falling into another nightmare; on the other hand, I could get up and go have a very needed shower, but I would have to leave the comfort of her arms and her room, and venture into our very own cemetery.

I went for the second option; I did crave a shower, and we couldn't let what once was the most cheerful flat in the Diagon Alley be covered by the darkness of grief forever.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

READER'S P. O. V.

I was shocked —in a good way, of course— when, the next time my eyes fluttered open was not due to a nightmare, but to the bright, warm sunlight inundating the room.

George was nowhere to be seen, and I wondered if last night had been a dream. I dismissed that idea as soon as I propped myself up on my forearms, seeing his bags near the bed and his dirty clothes laying on the carpet.

The door creaked, announcing the ginger's arrival even before he hesitantly entered the room. "Morning." He offered me a small smile.

"Morning." I replied, mimicking his expression. "How long have you been up?"

"For about..." he checked the clock in my room, leaning against the door frame. "Half an hour. Just had a shower and I was gonna make some breakfast."

My smile grew a little wider at his newly refreshed attitude. "In high spirits, are we?"

He clicked his tongue, tilting his head to the side. "Turns out that getting some sleep does wonders."

"Indeed." I agreed, stretching before standing up and walking to him. "C'mon, I'll help you with that breakfast."

"I can do it myself." He assured me, walking right behind me in the kitchen's direction.

"Last time you tried to cook, you set fire to the table."

He groaned, grabbing a knife to slice the bread he had left on the counter. "You won't let me live that down ever, will you?" I shook my head no, turning on the fire before grabbing a pan. "I hate you."

"Liar." I placed my hand above the pan to check the heat before requesting, "Pass me the slices."

"I was gonna make you breakfast," he complied, nonetheless. "Not the other way around."

"Are you complaining?" I quirked an eyebrow at George, making him roll his eyes at me and turn to the cabinets consequently to reach for the mugs. "I was thinking—"

"You? Thinking?" Snort. "The world's ending." He stated dramatically, preparing the coffee.

"Twit." I flipped the nearly ready toasts before resuming my sentence. "I was thinking that we should reopen the shop." George stayed silent, leaning against the counter by my side. "I think it would... Help." I stopped again, carefully picking my words. "Getting the business running... I think— we can't— we need to do something, to stay occupied." I looked at him, awaiting for an answer, or at least a glance, but his eyes were fixed on his slippers. "I don't mean right now," he tilted his chin up to stare at the opposite wall, and then his head spun to me. "but I—"

"Y/n!" His eyes went wide and he swiftly pulled me away from the pan, tossing the burning bread into the sink. "Merlin's beard." I pinched the bridge of my nose, sighing in defeat. "Trying to outmatch my kitchen pyromania?" George would have successfully lightened up the mood if I wasn't on the brink of a mental breakdown.

Fred had always been the one to cook. George wasn't even allowed in the kitchen for obvious reasons, and I myself had the attention span of a fruit fly.

"Oi..." George pulled me to his chest and my arms instantly wrapped around his middle. "What about we get dressed," he began, stroking my hair. "And we go have breakfast at The Leaky Cauldron?" I nodded against him, and he squeezed me tight before slowly pulling away. "We can start restocking when we come back, yeah?" I nodded again, catching a tear with the back of my sleeve before it could run down my cheek. "Then let's go." This time it was him who stretched his arm, offering me his hand, which I instantly took.

As we made our way back to my room, it dawned on me this would be one hell of a ride.

"Wait! The coffee!" I tugged him back to the kitchen.

"Shit!" We both jogged back in, rapidly putting away the coffee pot.

"I think we shouldn't cook." I stated. "At all."

"Agreed." He breathed out.

[elliotlikespuke]

Requesting a sick Nico? I don't care with what, I just want to boy to suffer. Please and thank you!

Hooooo boy I made him suffer. The good news about this is that it’s not likely contagious, but the bad news is that it’s probably bacterial meningitis. Normal flus don’t really cause this level of confusion. Boy was it fun to write this though. I really love the whole idea of “voyeurism” in terms of sickfics, having people watch a caretaker and a sickie, especially if the sickie would be embarrassed about it if they were coherent. Also I’m such such such a sucker for medic Will being a whole-ass medic and taking care of people in a practical way (not just a demigod magic kind of way).

You can probably tell that I’m hmmmm, pretty rusty at this whole “writing” thing.

Warnings: puke and rambling and reaaaaal rusty writing skills

“How long has he been like this?” Will’s voice rang out through the near-silent apartment. Nico was leaning on the back of the couch, either asleep or close to it. Sally sat on one side of him, Percy on the other. The Iris message was beginning to shimmer. Swearing, Percy threw in another drachma. 

“This is the third day,” Sally replied. “Well, the third day of throwing up. He just had a fever and a headache before then.”

Nico’s head lolled to the side on the couch, almost touching Sally’s shoulder. She put an arm up to guide it the rest of the way down, petting his hair and checking his forehead as she went. 

“He’s still burning up.”

“And he’s not keeping anything down?” Will’s voice was becoming tighter, more fraught with anxiety. He shifted on the desk chair he was sitting in. 

“Nothing.” Will’s reaction was making it hard for him to stay calm. After all the danger Nico had dealt with, this was what had Will worried? 

Will paused and looked towards something Percy couldn’t see. He mouthed something, and shook his head. “Uhh, okay. If he refuses to go to a hospital could you bring him here? I know it’s a long drive but I can only assume he’s dangerously dehydrated and—”

“We’ll do it,” Annabeth piped up from out of Will’s view. “It’s only a few hours. And we’ll speed.”

“Haul ass,”  Percy agreed, nodding. 

Will ran a hand through his hair. “Okay. I’ll see you soon.” 

Percy took a moment to think. Nico was in bad shape, still leaning against his mom and looking as pale as Percy had ever seen him. Annabeth was practically vibrating, getting things ready for a two-hour car trip. Paul was standing between the kitchen and the living room, holding a handful of plastic bags in case Nico needed them. Sally, bless her, was running her hands through Nico’s hair with a decidedly worried expression painted across her features. 

Percy caught his mom’s eye across the sofa. 

“I’m coming with you,” she said. Percy was going to protest, but as soon as he opened his mouth she said, “and that’s final. It’s snowy, and I’m a better driver than both of you.” 

For once, Annabeth didn’t complain about having her abilities questioned. Percy stood, and worked on getting Nico into a standing position. He hooked one of his arms around his shoulders and lifted. Nico was lighter than he expected. Between having no excess weight and having vomited for three days, he was rail thin. 

Percy had never been gladder that his parents had moved to a building with an elevator. It made the eight-flight journey while half-carrying a 15-year-old easier for everyone involved. Navigating the snow was harder. Over Christmas, the sidewalks had hardly been plowed, making their trek to the car frustrating for both of them. Nico, who just wanted to lie down, moaned incoherently until he was in the backseat of Paul’s Prius with Percy buckling his seatbelt.

Nico fell asleep almost immediately once they were on the road, his head propped against the foggy window. The peace only lasted the first half hour.

Nico’s bleary eyes cracked open. His head fell to one side and then shot up straight, suddenly alert. 

“‘m gonna throw up,” he murmured, his voice hoarse with sleep and sickness. He put one hand to his mouth and the other flailed, looking for one of the bags Paul had packed for them.

“Fuck! Hold on!” There was a rustling noise as Annabeth tried to free one of the bags from the tangle of them at her feet. Nico made a muffled, urgent sound against his hand and grabbed for the button on the car door. While his window rolled down, Sally slowed to a stop on the side of the highway. Before it was all the way down, Nico lurched. It was the closest to projectile vomiting he had come since he’d been sick. He barely managed to make it out the window while he sprayed sick from his chapped lips. He let his head fall, and it hung limply as he retched, painting the Prius with yellow bile. Between painful sounding retches, Nico gasped for air. The difficulty of simply breathing was audible. 

Percy looked anywhere but beside him, unlike Sally, who was staring at Nico’s back with pursed lips. 

“Pat his back,” she whispered to Percy. Percy was certain Nico was going to recoil at his touch. But then he didn’t. He continued to heave for another few minutes, with Percy rubbing his back. Even through the thick knit sweater (donated by Paul when Nico had started shivering with fever), Percy could feel every vertebra. Most horribly, he could feel Nico’s taut back muscles tensing, and hardly ever releasing long enough for him to relax.

When all was said and done, Nico brought his head back into the car and collapsed against the headrest. 

“Sorry,” he whispered. His voice was broken by the gurgling is his throat. Annabeth passed him a water bottle from the front seat. “It won’t stay down.”

“I know, but it’ll get the taste out of your mouth.” 

Nico fumbled with the cap for a moment before passing it to Percy, who cracked it with ease. Passing it back to Nico, he caught the blush on Nico’s cheeks. The needy, vulnerable Nico was new to both of them. 

With Nico back in the car, they set off again. Nico kept his eyes closed, but Percy was fairly sure he was awake and trying to coax himself into not being sick again. The rapid movements of his Adam’s apple gave him away. 

Percy wished they could turn on some music, or at least that he could join in Sally and Annabeth’s conversation, but they were speaking so quietly he could barely hear. The rest of the drive passed slowly with nothing to do but play games on his phone. Every few minutes, Nico would cough weakly, and Percy could hear the rattling breath in his lungs trying to escape. It was a pitiful sight.

Finally, they arrived at the base of the hill. Getting Nico out of the car was a harder matter altogether, and Percy had to wrap his hand in a plastic bag to avoid touching the bile now frozen to the door. Halfway up the hill, Kayla met them.

“Want some help?” She didn’t wait for an answer before she grabbed Nico’s other arm and helped Percy march him towards the infirmary. Sally and Annabeth were continuing their conversation behind him, though he couldn’t hear what they were saying over his and Kayla’s panting and the groans from the sick boy suspended between them.

Percy wondered idly if Sally had ever seen the infirmary. It had been updated even since Percy had last been there. Nico had told him it now boasted a tv that Will had fought for, claiming that boredom was pushing people out of the infirmary faster than they should be leaving. Percy suspected it was mostly for the staff’s benefit. 

Despite the lack of snow inside the campgrounds, the wind was still biting. Nico had thrown off his coat in the car, and he shivered so violently Percy thought he might drop him. 

Standing in the door of the infirmary was Will, his arms crossed over his chest to shield him from the cold. He wore blue scrubs, as he usually did when he was in the infirmary. The colour of the uniform set off his eyes, as did the red rim around them. The late hour seemed to hit Percy all at once. It was past midnight.

The group trudged over the threshold, and Kayla pulled Nico, and Percy with him, towards a bed. Will followed behind, trying his best to move with purpose and not look like a lost puppy. 

“Hey guys,” Will greeted belatedly. “Merry Christmas.”

There was a chorus of ‘Merry Christmas’ around the infirmary, and Will turned to Sally. 

“I’m Will, uh, by the way.” 

“We iris messaged a few hours ago.” Sally smiled back at him. He looked temporarily embarrassed until Sally said, “but it’s good to finally meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.”

“All good I hope?”

“All good.”

Will didn’t seem to hear the answer. Once Nico was lying in the bed, everything else seemed to fade away from Will’s vision. He strode over to the bedside to pull two rubber gloves from a box against the wall, and pulled over a rolling chair. 

“Kayla can you get, uh, a one litre bag of saline and a secondary bag of acetaminophen drip? I’m going to do an IV.”

Kayla nodded, happy to be bossed out of the room. Behind the curtains was crowded, and she didn’t think she could stand an awkward meeting-the-family moment between her brother and his boyfriend’s aunt.

“Hey,” Will said quietly to Nico. He grunted, but didn’t open his eyes. Will pursed his lips. He seemed all too aware of the eyes of everyone on the back of him, and his neck prickled uncomfortably. 

“Hey,” he tried again. “Can you open your eyes?”

Nico’s eyes fluttered open, and Will rushed to praise him. “Can you squeeze my fingers?”

Will slipped two of his fingers into Nico’s hand. Through the gloves he could feel how clammy they were. “Go ahead, break my fingers.” Nico smiled weakly and gave a watery cough. “There. You got it.”

Will brow was furrowed, but Nico’s was utterly relaxed for the first time since he’d begun vomiting. He pulled his fingers out of Nico’s hand and Nico whined. Everyone in the room, bar Nico and Will, glanced around uncomfortably. It seemed an intrusion to see them like this. 

Will reached a hand into a drawer by the bedside and drew out an infrared thermometer. The infirmary had gained some new toys since Will had become head medic apparently. There was no chance these were Chiron’s ideas. The worry was palpable in Will’s voice when he announced to the room, “104.3. Has he had any fever reducers?” 

“He threw up every time we tried to give him any.” Sally’s voice was taking on Will’s anxiety. 

Kayla came back into the room, holding several clear bags of liquid. She deposited them easily on a tray and slid it beside Will, drawing over an IV pole. 

“Get some cooling blankets.” Will’s voice had become harder, his medic side lashing out. He set to work cleaning the inside of Nico’s wrist and sliding a needle into a vein. His lower lip was held tightly between his teeth as he worked. Nico protested as valiantly as he could, which ended up being another whine and a slight shift of his arm, which was unable to move much in Will’s vice-like grip. He quickly arranged the IV tubing like he had done it a hundred times before which, Percy thought, he probably had. 

“It’s a good thing he’s so out of it for that. He usually fights tooth and nail when he has to get a needle,” Will was saying as Kayla entered the room.

“Usually Will can’t do it himself because Nico needs him to hold his hand.”

“More like break my hand.” 

The group smiled, except for Will, who remained as tightly wound as ever, staring at the tiny body on the infirmary bed. Kayla arranged the cooling blankets around Nico while Will turned to Percy, Annabeth, and Sally, who were still standing at the end of the bed holding their coats.

“Might as well sit down,” Will told them. “He’s going to be here for a while.”

Graciously, everyone sat down. While Will and Kayla debated over treatment options and tests, Sally looked at Nico. He was still sweaty, his eyelids fluttering now that Will was not touching him. She wondered just how long they’d been like this, able to calm each other with only a touch. Given reports by Percy and Annabeth, and vigorously refuted by Nico, it had been almost instantaneous from the moment they were friends. It was no surprise to Sally they had ended up together.

“He seems to know what he’s doing,” Sally whispered to Annabeth, who nodded.

“He’s got a gift. He modernized everything here. He’s doing good things.” 

Sally realized something suddenly and interrupted Will mid-conversation with his sister. 

“Why haven’t you given him any nectar or ambrosia?” She hadn’t meant for it to sound accusatory. Luckily Will, with all his preoccupations, didn’t seem to notice and took the question in stride.

“He shouldn’t consume anything orally until we get his stomach under control. Plus, it’s a fifty-fifty shot if those will work on sicknesses. They work great on injuries, but sometimes it’s not enough. That, and it raises your body temperature. Nico’s brain is already being boiled inside his skull, and to give him anything like that might give him permanent brain damage.”

Him and Kayla looked at each other quickly and without a word she handed him a pen from the pocket of her scrubs. Will pushed himself towards Nico and clicked the pen. For one stupid moment, Percy was sure it was going to turn into a sword. Instead, a bright light appeared on the end. 

“Nico, can you open your eyes?” It was shocking to hear Will speak like that. He was all business, ordering Kayla to fetch him things or telling everyone to sit down, but his voice softened considerably and took on a cooing quality when he addressed his boyfriend.

Nico groaned. He as if he were swimming through hot jello. Every one of his muscles seemed to weight twenty times what it usually did, and the thought of opening his eyes made him want to sob. Gingerly, he opened one eye, just as he had done before. He had done it before, right?

“Are you experiencing light sensitivity?” Will asked him. Nico could hardly respond, so he groaned. Will slid a thumb onto Nico’s eyelid and held it open, shining the light into it. Nico could feel his eye watering from the wasted effort of closing it against Will’s thumb. After what felt like an hour of a knife being pushed directly into his right eye, Will switched to the other one. 

“Pupillary response is normal and equal,” he said to Kayla. He turned to the rest of them. “That’s a good sign. It means that his brain is still responding correctly to certain stimuli, which means that there’s little chance of damage.”

He sat back in his chair, dropping his face into his hands for only a moment before he heard a choking noise. Sally yelped, and stood to help. He looked towards Nico, who was trying (and failing) to swallow back his gags. Acting on a whim, Will grabbed Nico’s shoulder and rolled him towards himself, placing one hand on his back and the other in his hair while Nico’s gags finally became productive. He coughed, splattering Will’s scrubs with bile. After a gasping breath, he heaved again. This time the sick dribbled out of his mouth and onto the pillow below his head, coating his cheek in it too.  He burped sickly and gave a great, groaning cough. 

Will, who had been murmuring encouragements to him the whole time, grabbed a tissue from beside the bed and began wiping his mouth. Nico didn’t seem to notice. He just kept mumbling, “I don’t want to throw up anymore. Please make it stop. Make it stop. Please.”

Percy’s heart broke for him. He shouldn’t mention this to Nico when he was coherent, or he’d probably be turned to stone with a single glare, but despite the awful situation, seeing Nico being looked after filled him with comfort. He had spent so long being alone and uncared for. As long as Will was around, he’d never have to face that again.

[friking-awsom-kitten]

Sleeping don't need no sleep IASA Chapter 3

"Danny Fenton."

Erica, the receptionist, got their attention with little effort.

The small group that just kept getting bigger by the hour snapped to attention. Maddie, who had returned two hours ago looking dejected and saying she'd done all she could for then, scrambled up from her hunched over position on the plastic chair and faced the woman. Sam and Tucker, who'd been half hiding behind Jack from the questions of the group around them, stopped whispering quietly to each other and looked at her with glassy eyes.

Erica smiled reassuringly. "The doctors have done all they could. He should be fine."

The room was filled with sudden chaotic cheering and whooping. Laughing as they embraced each other.

"I knew it," Jack muttered as he held his crying wife. "Us Fentons don't stay down for long."

Erica smiled, though now it seemed a bit more of a grimace. "However, he's in a coma."

The ones who heard her fell silent and hushed the other celebrating people. They threw her some concerned glances.

"How long?" A teenage girl asked softly.

"We don't know." Erica bit her lip. "Given Danny's interesting case, it makes it hard to figure out."

"But he should awake by now," Sam frowned, mind clouded in fear. She stood up, fists clenched. "Is he not awake?"

"He took a very hard hit, Miss," Erica responded in confusion.

Tucker stood next to his best friend too. His eyebrows furrowed and lips pressed together. "He's had worse. It's been hours. He's usually awake by now. Probably not fine and delirious, but at least conscious." Equations seemed to be running around in his head. "You gave him sedatives, didn't you?"

Erica ruffled through the papers and nodded. "To make sure he didn't wake during the procedure. It will wear off in a half hour. However, we don't expect him to be awake until at least another three weeks." She glanced up at the two teens who were looking almost angry. As if she was lying to them and the universe didn't make sense anymore. They were trying to grasp at something they could understand. She took a short breath. It was usually not allowed, especially to all these people around them, but they needed to have something to stand on and ground themselves. They had to know everything about this boy's health to get a clear understanding. "Danny got a bad concussion, several burns and scrapes. His left leg is severely bruised and his chest area is damaged." She paused. "Was he in perfect condition before he got all these injuries?"

Sam and Tucker faltered and exchanged glances. Erica was looking at the Fentons but it was Danny's best friends who answered.

"No," Tucker bit his lip before continuing. "He was very tired. We suspect he probably hadn't slept in days. He was stressed because of the tests at school," he bit out, as if angry at the school for putting such weight on his friend's shoulders.

"That leg injury was from another ghost fight," Sam added. "He was pretty drained last time I saw him. Probably because of the sudden rise in ghost attacks."

Maddie looked very crestfallen. Her desire to contribute something to the conversation had her saying: "At this time of the year the barrier between the Ghost Zone and here is thinner than normal. Natural portals have been opening up everywhere around Amity Park, where the ectoplasm is more concentrated than anywhere else in the world."

The rest of the group nodded along as if they had any idea what was being said.

Erica looked a bit more worried. She shifted her hold on the stack of papers in her hands and sighed. "Whatever the cause, Danny is not in his best condition and won't be waking up anytime soon. Everything that can be done has been done. He will stay in the hospital so we can monitor him and adjust to his needs. Maddie and Jack will be contacted if anything happens." She looked around at the crowd of hopeful faces and nodded. "He is apt for visitors. However, close family members first. After they are done, and with only their permission, you will be allowed in by threes."

There were smiles and sighs of relief. Maddie and Jack stepped forward to follow Erica, but Sam and Tucker stopped them.

"Can we go with?"

Maddie looked at Erica. "They are very close friends to my son. We would consider them family too."

The woman smiled fondly. She had guessed that. She nodded and the four of them walked the hallways, passing many rooms and once sidestepping a a group carrying a stretcher.

Tucker felt a bit bad about not caring if that other person was ok. He only wanted to see Danny as soon as possible.

Erica kept talking, giving them some information on his situation. "He was put in ICU and needs to be monitored constantly. There may be a nurse with him. He needs to be looked after at least 12 hours a day."

Jack frowned. "What kind of bill are we getting?" He asked rhetorically.

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that." Erica grinned at them. "We have agreed to let him stay for free and the nurses caring for him are volunteers."

Jack's mouth dropped. "Why?!"

She smiled, looking towards a specific door. "We owe him."

Finally, she opened a door and the four of them peeked in.

There were four beds. Only two were occupied. In one, an old woman was lying, another comatose patient. Some pictures were placed on the table next to her and an IV was stuck on her hand. On the other.

They rushed in to group around the bed that was too big for the body on it. The boy was as pale as the sheets under him and he was covered in bandages. He had been cleaned and his face held a few Band-Aids that kept some cuts together.

Maddie reached out and held his hand. It had an IV on the back that she decided to ignore. Jack placed his hands on the bed next to Danny's legs, looking as if he was refraining himself from hugging him. Sam held her arms tightly close to her chest. She clenched and unclenched her fists. She shouldn't be worried. Danny's had worse. He'll be fine. She won't cry.

Tucker seemed to have missed the memo because he had made a fist on the blanket Danny was lying under and tears were spilling out on his face. "Please Danny," he pleaded. "Prove them wrong. Like you always do." He bowed his head next to his brother's. "Wake up soon."

[vicky-shitposts]

music for cars (the end)

21 feb 2021,

it's 5 am and i just wish i had some fucking booze. it's tempting to go to the garage round the corner and get a bottle of something, or maybe even a monster?? anything to keep me awake. how the fuck did i used to do all nighters, so often and so frequently?? this is painful. i guess this is the price i must pay for fucking myself over. just finished the last 5 pages of the With Nails chapter i started earlier today/yesterday/whenever because time is NOT real and is just ANOTHER way that the government CONTROLS US. im dying to see Withnail And I again, it's only been 6 days since i saw it last and i can't stop thinking about it - in the last 24 hours alone ive heard the soundtrack twice. i can't stop quoting it either, but it proves somewhat discouraging when i give some of my friends my favourite lines in a snapchat video and none of them seem to care. am i annoying you?? do you care?? by this point i live on caffeine, energy drinks or not. my eyelids are drooping and i think i need my first cup of coffee today. i wish home bargains still stocked pussy because i never got to try it and really fancy doing so, plus i need a new can of deodorant too so i can kill two birds with one stone if i go later. provided i don't pass out and fall asleep by then that is.

coffee acquired, watching Dan Nerdcubed play Hitman, almost half 7. home bargains opens in half an hour, so after this video im gunna throw on some clothes - a band tee, black hoodie, black leggings and my fuck off goth boots - to go get deodorant to drink and energy drink to cover myself in. next stop antifreeze, or better, lighter fluid!! first coffee of the day also means first shit of the day, i think, im losing count.

shop doesn't open until ten am HAHAHAH what the fuck am i supposed to do for an hour and a half?? i literally just got dressed and gave myself a pep talk, FOR NOTHING!! started writing a not-fanfic and started work on a new song thanks to Phoebe - they're such a muse for me right now, always stimulating my creative mind. in other news, ive just had my first monster in almost two months as it was the only way i could survive today. currently im running on being awake for 13 hours straight and am in my MANIC PHASE. i can't wait to crash and burn after dinner, enter the depression :( phase :( and ignore the world again. at least i have college tomorrow, i really can't wait to go back. me and mum also got 100% on Lego Harry Potter Years 5-7 today and ps. fuck jk rowling FUCK YOU DRAGON!!

the depression phase has set in. a year ago today i was with my friend Owen seeing The 1975 live for the first time at the O2. we've both been fans since '13 and he's the reason i'm a fan, only to have had my numbness soothed by songs like Robbers and Love It If We Made it - so thank you Owen, for making sure i got this far. but i wanted to celebrate the occasion by listening to their last album while i went on a walk again. rather than feeling elated or happy, i just feel empty and like something is missing. because there's loads missing. a year ago today i wrote a so g called I'm Sat At A Concert And I'm Thinking Of You about Georgia, because every love song The 1975 played made me think of her. either j had my emotions confused again or i genuinely felt something for her. but i ended up falling out with her, and Rachel, and even Megan - another fan of the '75 i almost ended up in a relationship with before i was able to ruin it. surprise surprise!! i think about and miss them all daily and there's nothing i can do to get them back. i just want to phone one of them up and speak like civil friends, but i know that won't happen. maybe that's me romanticising my life?? i want to just call somebody up and talk, like therapy or a vent session. but it just feels like there's nobody there, that i would be annoying or a nuisance. i guess that's one of the down sides of forcing yourself into isolation and away from people. i also think i realised that Inner Mechanism, thought about my dwindling mental health, has this underlying theme of the people i love and miss the most. if it wasn't for at least five different people, this album wouldn't have been written and materialised. which has kind of given me a spark of drive to finish it and put it out asap, but at the same time, i don't know or think i have the energy right now.