#let them do dumb shit that makes them super cool

[c0la-queen]

RAGHHHHHHHHH

Could you ever so kind and provide some general dating Headcannons for all the four boys?? 🥺👉👈

Maybe some extra with red leader or someone else if you’re fine with that??? 🥺💜

Mwah mwah you have amazing work <3 /p

Oh my gods I am SO sorry that this is so late!! For some reason, Mr. Tumblr decided not to notify me about your ask?? And then I was at my bestie's house this weekend, so I haven't checked my inbox until now. Begging for your forgiveness rn Anon!!

Also literally kissing you for asking for Red Leader!! Mwah, mwah!!

---

Edd

If you are dating Edd... girlie I am so sorry for your sanity.

Don't get me wrong, I love Edd! He was my first Eddsworld love, my pookie bear for real! But he's the biggest bastard of the entire gang and I stand by that.

Calls you dumb pet names to try and make you laugh. Sugar Tits (regardless of gender or lack thereof, might I add), Baby Doll, Sexy.

He WILL grab/slap your ass all the time. Even in public. Only grins when you glare at him.

This man is a horrible influence. It will be so hard to get your shit done if he has decided that you need to be spending time with him. Why worry about work or chores when you could be all cuddled up with him and Ringo on the couch?

Will sulk if you reject his attempts.

If he's trying to get shit done and you're pestering him for attention? He will drop his basket of laundry or the dishes in his hands in a millisecond.

If he's working on a commission or animation, he'll let you sit in his lap in his chair, let you sit all pretty for him while he works. When he finishes, if you've fallen asleep by then -which you usually do - then he'll carefully move you both to his bed and snuggle up to you and take a nap with you.

Speaking of cuddling, he does naturally run hot. Comes with being a big boy <3 But if you don't enjoy that, then he'll use his powers to cool down his skin for you. Anything to keep cuddling!

He also uses his powers whenever possible. Will abuse them without shame. He puts things on the highest shelf, just so you have to him for help. He'll put patches of ice on the floor under your feet, just so he can catch you before you fall (he'll never let you actually get hurt), and uses his super strength to scoop you up randomly and carry you around.

You cannot show your text messages to ANYONE. He will say filthy things, just to fluster you. Horny Bastard. Finds ways to turn even the most mundane conversations into teasing.

He'd do cute couple things with you, like painting together and swapping canvases every 5 minutes. His favorite is going to cat cafes. The cats literally love him, its like he's made of catnip with how they swarm him.

Physical affection is a huge thing with him. Even little touches throughout the day, like ruffling your hair as he passes by, or a big hug from behind while you fix food.

Overall, big teddy bear that just likes to see his darling blush.

Tom

As I've stated in previous works, Tom is a secret romantic.

He's not a traditional romantic like Matt, but he's romantic in his own way.

Likes parallel play a lot. Finds it relaxing to just sit in his room, testing new songs on his bass while you lay on his bed reading a book. Or in your room, lounging on one of your plush beanbag and organizing his Spotify playlists while you fold your laundry.

Dates with him consist of record stores, concerts, and late night walks.

He'll sing for you if you ask him to.

Very down to earth, both as a person and as a boyfriend. If you have problems, he'll listen patiently until you're done, then help you brainstorm solutions. He doesn't downplay or ignore your feelings, but he doesn't jump to emotions like others might.

He tends to sleep in late on his nights off, since he's more of a night owl than anything. You know that, so you've made it a little tradition to fix him coffee around 11. You know exactly how he takes it, and he always thanks you with a kiss on the cheek and a sleepy, mumbled "you're the best."

Very caring. He'll make sure you've eaten and had water. Will usher you to bed if he can see that you're tired, or do your chores for you if you can't do them for whatever reason. If you can't sleep, he'll make you a mug of chamomile tea and sing you a little lullaby.

When it comes to his monster tendencies, he tries to keep you away from it all. He's bitter about what he is, and he thinks that you're better off separated from that side of him.

At the start of relationship, he'd get angry if you tried to push it. He'd snap at you, distance himself, not talk to you for maybe a couple of days. Further on in the relationship, though, if you push the issue and reassure him that you love every side of him, even the monstrous one, then he'd be more willing. Willing to let you in, to let you see that part of him. He'd be nervous about it, but he'd do it because he loves you.

Matt

He is a traditional romantic! His Mama raised him right, and he drinks his Respect Juice.

Makes sure you two have date night at least once every week. Dressing up nice, going out to dinner or a play, taking a walk through the town to wind down the night. Heading back into the house, changing back into comfortable clothes. He'd wipe your makeup off for you, if you wear it.

Absolutely the kind of guy to get down on his knees in front of you and unbuckle/untie your shoes or high heels for you. He's just so devotional.

If, for whatever reason, you guys are unable to have your date night, he'll make it up to you in some way. A bouquet of your favorite flowers sitting on your bed with a little note. A passionate kiss before one of you has to leave the house. A heartfelt love letter sealed with wax.

Makes sure to text you throughout the day with sweet messages. Compliments, "I love you"s, selfies, updates on what is happening at work. Or just reminders that he's thinking of you. Misses you.

Likes to cook meals for you if its just the two of you at home. Breakfast is his forte, but he's not the worst at following a recipe.

Always amazing for advice. He'll let you talk to him while he hugs you from behind. If it's something sad, he might cry. Just the idea of you going through something negative makes him sad, too.

If he doesn't have advice for you, he'd do anything in his power to find someone who does. One of the other roommates, or even his mother, if you're comfortable with it.

Speaking of his mother, she absolutely adores you. Since Matt has such a good relationship with her, he's already told her so much about you. She thinks its wonderful that her baby has fallen in love. After a while, Matt will even bring you along to his lunches with his mother. You two hit it off instantly.

If you're okay with it, then Matt would love to show you off on his social media. He thinks you're so gorgeous, the entire world should know that he managed to land you. Its never anything invasive, and he always gets your permission before he posts things. Blocks any weird or gross comments.

Loves going on shopping dates with you. Most of the time, its at the mall or a mall in a different town, because he loves walking around and window shopping. Occasionally, he'll take you to more expensive stores. It doesn't bother him, he loves spoiling you. No matter where you two are, he'll buy you anything that you want. If you are adamant to spend your own money, he won't put up too much of a fuss, though he does prefer to pay for you.

He'll do that couples trend with you where you find nail polish that matches the other's eye color.

Gift giving is just one of his love languages in general. It makes him so happy to give his loved one things that he bought. For you specifically, he'll also throw in hand made gifts. He may not be the most talented artistically, but he'll stay awake late into the night, sitting on the floor with a YouTube tutorial playing, paper and cardboard scattered around, a pencil between his teeth, paint on his hands and smeared on his cheek. The end result may look a little crude, but he'll still present it to you with pride. And, of course, you always love it.

Tord

Tord is probably the most romantically stunted of the four. Its not that he doesn't love you, far from it really. He just grew up in an environment where love wasn't freely given, and was often limited for appearances.

His father, as the Red Leader, insisted that he keep a professional and feared image. So, Tord never saw him being affectionate with his mother.

It might be hard at first. You'll struggle. You two may fight. But you'll always make up in the end. He'll listen to you, try to understand your point of view.

He's not against physical affection, but he's able to live without it. Will indulge you whenever you ask. If he's busy, which he usually is, he'll let you drape yourself over him from behind while he sits in his chair, letting you rest your cheek on the top of his head and watch him work.

More than anything, his love language is words of affirmation. Despite being a man of few words, he'll always give you praise. He'll make sure you know that you are his, he is yours, and he loves you. Nothing will change that.

Scary dog privilege. He'll always walk just behind you in public, keeping a guiding hand on the small of your back. Stays alert of you surroundings and the people around, so that you don't have to. You don't even have to worry about people approaching you in public. One piercing glare from Tord is enough to deter anyone.

Not the best at giving advice to problems. He'll listen, but sometimes he can't quite understand why something is an issue. Doesn't invalidate your feelings on purpose, it just happens inadvertently at times. Always, ALWAYS apologizes and holds you close when he realizes what he did.

His preferred dates are nights in at home. Cuddled up on the couch with takeout watching shitty rom-coms. Cooking food that he ate growing up in Norway while you sit at the kitchen table watching. Going to the convenience store at midnight to get Ben and Jerry's in the middle of anime binges.

You become his crutch. When he's having bad paranoia on nights that are too quiet, he'll seek you out. Just having you lay in bed with him, warm and solid and breathing, always calms him down.

He will never let you meet his parents. You are one of the very few good things in his life, and he wants to keep that away from his fucked up home life. Might let you meet his little sister, but not for a long time.

Surprisingly, he does tend to talk more when its just the two of you. He allows you into his head, verbalizing his thoughts to you. He'll ramble about his projects, tell you about the history behind his culture, or rant about things that annoy him. Denies it vehemently in front of others.

He is a huge tease, second only to Edd. What's dangerous is how casual he is about it. Loves making you squirm, and he'll never even change his expression. Sometimes he won't even be looking at you, but rest assured that he is swimming in satisfaction over how flustered you are.

Red Leader

I have so many thoughts about him. Oh my lord.

This is going off the scenario where Reader is a Red Army soldier and met him through the army, after the events of The End.

I want to clarify that this is NOT following the events of TBATF!!! This is my own Red Army timeline, what I refer to in my Eddsworld bubble as "The Bad End"

There are two ways that you'd be able to catch Red Leader's attention. Either you are an extremely talented soldier that does well among your peers, enough to earn the praise of your superior officers and eventually Red Leader himself. Or, you were assigned as his personal assistant to help with paperwork and meetings, but you were so good at handling his temper and attitude that he found himself surprised.

The latter of the two is my favorite, so I'll be working under that one.

Before you, Red Leader had been through several assistants. None of them lasted more than a month. By nature, he was a moody, temperamental man. The stress of the army and oncoming war only made that worse. He saw those previous assistants as nuisances, only getting in his way. He would yell at them, berate them, drive them to the brink until they beg Paul and Pat to transfer them.

When they assigned you to him, they expected the same thing to happen. The two even made bets on how long you'd last. On your first day, Red Leader was nasty to you. Gruff and rude. But... you bit back. That took him by surprise. Instead of taking the insult and shuffling out like a puppy with its tail between its legs, you pursed your lips and gave him a stern look and talked to him in a way that nobody dared to. He should've been angry. Should have screamed at you, discharged you from the army in a heartbeat.

Instead, he found that he quite enjoyed it. He enjoyed your spitfire. Not that he'd let you know. He only gave you a noncommittal hum and dismissed you with a wave of his hand. But... he kept you around. Even found excuses for you to come into his office more than necessary. His penchant for teasing came back full force. He'd poke and prod, finding ways to make you react with that fire he so loved.

It takes a long time for him to finally make a move. Probably takes a near-death experience for him, or an injury to you for him to realize that he wants this. He wants a future with you.

At first, he may seem a little cold in public. Not to the degree that his father was - he promised himself that he would never be like his father. Simply a more... professional air about the entire thing. It was more out of anxiety than anything. He didn't want to make you a target, didn't want to cause you to get hurt. As his army grows more powerful and takes over more and more countries, he grows more comfortable with PDA. He knows that when he is the most powerful man in the world, he doesn't have to worry about anyone hurting you.

He would probably treat you more like a spouse than a girlfriend/boyfriend right off the bat. He's older now, thinking more about the future than the present. He already knows that he wants to be with you forever, so why go through the formalities and hassle of dating?

Always makes time for you whenever he can. If he's in a meeting with his generals or another world leader, he'll sneak text messages to you. Doesn't give a shit if he's caught. What are they going to do to him, Red Leader?

If he's cooped up in his office all day, his door is always open to you. Loves having you drop by unannounced to bring him food or coffee. He'll let you climb into his lap while he works, or sit behind him in his chair and cling to him. Even if you're just sitting in a separate chair nearby, working on your own stuff. He's happy.

If you want to continue being a soldier, or his assistant, he'll let you. But he's also perfectly happy to have you simply be his partner and not have a care in the world. You could sit all pretty in his quarters waiting for him to get off duty, or use the time to pursue your own hobbies and interests. As long as you're happy and cared for, it's okay with him.

Spoils you rotten. You're Red Leader's, so of course you only deserve the best things. Anything in the world you want, you only have to ask for it. It's yours. He would raze entire cities just to see you smile.

He does enjoy taking you out on dates. While also spending time with you, he sees it as a way to show you off to the world. Dressing you up in the finest clothes that he got you, the prettiest jewelry that he bought. Taking you to restaurants and operas where everyone can see you hanging on his arm. It makes him puff up with pride.

When the two of you are alone, he's so adoring. Loves snuggling. It's a struggle to convince him to let you out of bed in the mornings, he'll just be clinging to you. If you do somehow manage to escape his grasp, he'll catch you around the waist and drag you back to bed. Won't stop until Paul or Pat message him to get his ass out of bed. He always grumbles about how "it's my damn army, I should get to sleep in as long as I want".

Sometimes, at night, he has pains in his right shoulder, the side where he's burned and amputated. It can range from a dull ache to excruciating pain. On nights that it hurts too much to move, you'll scramble out of bed and get his medication from his nightstand, gently coaxing him to take it. You'll hold him and comfort him until the pain subsides and he falls back asleep.

He doesn't like to talk about it, really. It feels weird, letting anyone see this part of his life. Letting you see his vulnerability. Letting you see him.

But he does.

[base0h]

Hayo, I noticed ur blog and fell in love. I was wondering if I could request Smoker, Crocodile, Zoro, and Hihawk with an S/O who is reckless. I'm talking like Luffy kinda reckless. Oh, this berry might be super poisonous? Only one way to find out-

a/n - awww you’re so sweet I’m glad you like my blog 💜💜 oml I’m giggling tysm nero for the request !

Warnings ⚠️ - crack kinda, g/n reader

Opposites attract

- poor man is so tired

- “CROCO- I FOUND A MUSHROOM LOOK LOOK! It matches your hair!! tastes a bit funny though.” You said excitedly, showing your lover the black mushroom

- the color should’ve been the first hint that maybe you shouldn’t eat that.

- but you ate it anyways

- “cool. Cool.”

- “… wait what.”

- he needed a minute

- then it clicked, you collapsed to the ground, coughing and clutching your stomach from the pain

- “Y/n- you ate a random mushroom?!”

- frantically trying to not freak out

- he’s trying to remain calm. but it’s not working

- god the pain was unbearable, your stomach churning but also cramping at the same time

- And to make it better? You might’ve eaten the entire mushroom 🙃

- he’s not a doctor wtf is he supposed to do-???

- literally slapping your back to try and get you to spit it out

- “I ALREADY SWALLOWED IT- STOP OW!”

- you survived, but crocodile’s sanity didn’t lol

- in battles, you were always the first one to spring into action, much to your lover’s dismay

- “Let’s go!!!” You shouted, jumping off the ship, running straight towards the marine encampment

- “Y/N GET BACK HERE-!”

- he didn’t even get to explain the plan yet

- man loves you a lot, so he sticks with you even though you drive him insane

- “y/n don’t you even think about eating that. it was on the ground.”

- “but- 5 second rule-“

- “NO-“

- ….

- *eats it anyways*

- he’s like a wall

- does he ever express emotion to your shenanigans???

- definition of 🗿

- you end up getting into more dumb shit just to see if he’d react

- you could be choking on a poisonous berry, and all he does is fucking slap your back, and you spit it out no problem

- he’s like those magic moms

- he wouldn’t appreciate being called that

- right before you rush to jump off the cliff, he literally just grabs you by the back of your shirt like you’re a tiny cat

- he does it with one hand while he’s reading the newspaper with the other

- not even looking

- you’re honestly tired of trying to get him to react, so you end up falling asleep on him sometimes, exhausted from all your reckless activities

- oh if only you were awake to see how he reacted to this

- he had a soft smile on his face, and he ran his fingers through your hair, softly patting your back and hugging you close to him

- this was the time that he reacted, and you were unfortunately asleep 🙃

- you’re bad for his health

- you give him heart attacks every single day

- Tashigi has started to give him free therapy sometimes

- when you literally jump off the ship before he can explain the plan to you, he has to quickly grab you with his smokey hands

- he has an amazing reaction time thanks to you :)

- “Smokey! I was just gonna take care of ‘em for you!” You said with a smile, hanging in front of your lover

- how could he not forgive you???? He loved you too much to stay mad

- he has to keep you close by, but when you suddenly disappear, and he sees you beating up a bunch of pirates in the distance

- my god you’re going to be the death of him

- all he wants is for you to be safe, and you’re charging straight towards the danger with a huge smile on your face-

- “Smokey!!!! I beat them up for you!” You said, waving at him

- you were sitting on top the pile of beaten up pirates with your big smile that smoker loved so much

- he couldn’t help but smile back with a tired sigh

- he one time almost couldn’t breathe because he couldn’t find you for a good five minutes before you jumped out of a barrel to spook him

- man was so scared he couldn’t move

- “um. smokey are you ok?…”

- it took a good five minutes for his mind to process what just happened, and then he scolded you for another ten :)

- obviously you didn’t listen to even half of what he said tho 👍

- I mean he has Luffy as a captain, so he’s pretty used to it

- or so he thought.

- you were eating a mushroom right in front of him, and he looked confused as to what exactly you were eating

- “Did the pervert cook give you a mushroom??”

- “No- mffm. I found it.”

- your mouth was full, and then you swallowed it right when he realized

- "YOU IDIOT-! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DO THAT!"

- frantically slapping you

- it left bruises

- "cant you just shit it out?!"

- "I CANT SHIT ON COMMAND MOSSHEAD!"

- chopper saved you, but now Zoro has to accompany you everytime you explore the islands

- you picked up some berries from a nearby bush, and you were about to put them in your mouth

- he bonked your head with his fist, "don't even think about it y/n."

- "OW THAT HURT IDIOT!"

- you hit him back and it started a whole fight

- you won >:)

a/n - hehe these are fun

[shinjisdone]

Female! MC and Friends - Deuce Spade

[What's it like to hang out with Deuce and be dragged into his Events as a female]

(Very much and I mean very much and I mean super duper, incredibly unbelievably, HUMONGUSLY AND GIGANTICALLY based on my oc's reaction)

Oh, sweet, sweet Deuce.

Your meeting may have been rocky and awkward but he quickly grew on you as he realized that he can be himself around you without any judgement. He's sweet and thoughtful, a bit dumb but such a great guy that it is impossible to dislike him.

Though it was really, uh, surprising to find out that the guy who first wouldn't look you in the eye, would stand frozen in your presence or stutter like crazy because he doesnt know how to be around girls, to vehemently threaten to beat two guys black and blue for cracking eggs - and never did you think he'd become one of your closest friends.

You consider him your best friend and vice versa (but don't tell Ace or Grim).

As much as you enjoy being around him, this...'gap' that he has of switching between a hard-working good boy and straight up delinquent is...uh...

Well, you do end up in odd situations due to it.

At Helloween...

At Helloween, Deuce was eager to show his best.

No matter your costume, Deuce will let you know that you look good - er, scary!

Even if it objectively sucks and Ace is laughing at you, Deuce will compliment the effort you put into it! That's what counts!

If you dress up in a way that's anything but scary (maybe stylish, cool or cute?) then Deuce might be...confused? It's Helloween. You're supposed to be scary.

Like; You could be the cutest witch or the trendiest ghoul but Deuce is like ???? Where's the blood and gore??? Where scary???

Will support your decision no matter what though even if he doesn't get it!

But when he gets possesed during the night, crying and calling for his mother, you were concerned and maybe a bit weirded out.

"Would you like to talk?" You place a hand on his shoulder and he's grateful for it, though too embarrassed to show it.

Once everything is settled and normal, you talk before Deuce feels good enough to go out there again.

Maybe there's more to discuss but he's happy you were so considered. Might be squealing inside and tear up (Deuce no, you just stopped crying) before wiping it off and proclaiming to be the scariest monster tonight! He'll scare the shit out of everyone, they'll forget what happened earlier!

Might invite you to trick-and-treating. Well, it's Helloween and it's fun and you are his b-best fr-friend, so...

Whether you can do that or not, be sure to share some sweets with him (those with eggs or egg-shaped will make him happy!) After your spooky tour.

If you are spooked easily, Deuce will first be like "??? For real?" But then explain to you that no one really wants to do you harm. It's all in good fun!

But...if someone takes it too far with scaring you, be sure that delinquent!Deuce will teach 'em a lesson! Switches his personality real quick, good boy to 'haaAAAH? WHAT DID U SAY TO HER?!" real quick.

Goes full into his scary costume persona and threatens people to bury them alive.

When others try to brush it off as a joke or him just playing his role, they are playing with fire. Deuce is more serious than they think.

'Dude...calm down, you're living the role a bit too much!'

'Hah? A gravekeeper gotta do his duty and yer being too loud for a corpse...'

You're his best friend...he won't allow anyone to talk to you or mess with you like that!

Plus, Deuce is especially protective of you since you are a girl.

Please stop him before he ruins Helloween (and worse, Riddle finds out...)

Haunted house? Sure, Sounds like fun! Let's go, my besuto furendo! Ah, but don't tell Ace and Grim, they're just gonna keep making fun of you two and ruin the atmosphere by 'booohing~' all over the place, thinking they're scary.

Deuce would enjoy it much more with only you two. :)

Cmon, lets take this haunted house on!

He first says with great vigor but feels himself get unnerved real quickly by all these effects and spells.

N-no, he aint scared! N-n-not at all, what are ya talking about????

Will jump silently at each spook and unwittingly get closer to your side. Please don't tease him OR promise to protect him. He's not scared after all! HE'S NOT!

If YOU get scared, Deuce got a problem. He says he'll look out for you no problem...! But has to act like he's not pissing his pants as well...!

Gets kinda in front of but also next to you, holding his fists up. Eerily quiet as he acts like a Bodyguard while trying not to squeak in fear.

However, if somehow something's targeting you especially, Deuce will once again go into delinquent mode.

Screaming profanities while also shaking to the bone. HUUUHHH? W-Whaddya think you're doing, t-targeting his best f-friend! Don't get on his nerves...!

Really wants to get out of there.

At New Year's...

You make sure to keep being a regular for him and be his gREATEST SUPPORT AND FAN, YOU WILL BUY EVERY PRODUCT HE RECOMMENdS BECAUSE THAT IS HOW FAR YOU WILL GO FOR DEUCE

My man is so humbled and touched, like he just wants to keep giving you discount after discount with the goofiest smile. Sam has to stop him before he loses profit.

Will. Do. His. Very. Best. Until dawn. Deuce feels so supported by you, he feels like he could carry mountains!

Shows off his new Yukata to you. Did you know that you can hide things in those sleeves? And look how many layers these clothes have! Really interesting, he never has worn something like a Yukata before so he gushes about his experiences of it with you.

Oh, would you like to wear one, too? Sam can surely prepare one. Oh, would you like a kimono instead?

Looks forward to your visits - ahem, patronage! Sam probably told him how to speak with customers so he puffs out his chest, clears his throat and adresses you with 'Miss' or Ma'am' (the latter you found funny. Bro, we are both first-years.). He might play his role really well and bow to you and recomend you things that a 'Miss' like you might want or need. It's humoring but there's a chance he might slip up and talk to you like usual.

If old-school stuff like that makes you laugh, it makes his experience as a shop clerk 100% better. Hearing you giggle recruits his spirit on times where he feels tired.

Might get all sappy and genuinely thank you for the support, not only as a customer but for all that you've done for him this year. He looks forward to the next...! And hopes you'll still be there with him.

When he cooks...

People will keep you from being the judge because they just know, THEY JUST KNOW you're gonna be nice to Deuce even if he presented you actual garbage on a plate.

No judging for you! Giving a nine for a undercooked dish with bits of eggshells in it is lying, dummy.

Nevertheless, you cheer Deuce on! Ace sarcastically calls you his 'cheerleader'. And you can bet Deuce turns his head and cheers back with a big grin, waving around the utensil in his hand (he's getting food all over the place and the stove is burning - but his homie is cheering him on!)

If there are leftovers, Deuce will give them to you. Now you have to be nice because he's really looking forward to your critique and will take it very much to heart.

Will keep on improving his cooking skills and chooses you as his judge everytime. It's nice to get extra free food but you're always being nice...Ace says he can't improve like that when you aren't honest. He's right but...you can't crush that big hopeful glint in his eyes, look at him 🥺

Besides, Deuce kinda gets fired up and extra careful when thinking of making food for you. It's extra motivation. It hits different when he makes things for people he cares about; his mom, grandma, friends and you.

Ngl, he has preferances and really likes to make things for you as thanks for always sticking by him. Sometimes Deuce believes he doesnt deserve it.

Expect a lot of egg dishes.

When YOU cook for him or in general, man, prepare to have him be fired up!

A five-course meal? A bento box? Or a simple sandwich? It would not matter, Deuce would eat them all equally carefully, delicately and savoring each bite. He'd give his opinion with a full, chewing mouth.

And if it makes you happy? BRO he will do ANYTHING FOR YOU. Cheer on your cooking, volunteer to even eat garbage for you, protect your food, utensils, kitchen, EVERYTHING!

It's just...so nice. No one but his mom cared enough to make him food. All he ever did was cause trouble for everyone and those he considered his 'friends' were just as shallow and troubled as him.

But you here care. And it makes him so happy.

Stay in his life forever, won't you?

(He might say that outloud all of a sudden after thinking hard and silently, the food spitting out of his mouth as he looks at you and says this. Ace is a bit flabbergasted and yells out 'OI. That sounds almost like...! Like...! Ya know?! Deuce, dude, think before you say anything! Is the food laced with some potion, is makin' ya say weird shit????'

Deuce doesn't quite get it but he didn't really mean it in a way for you to always cook for him. But these dishes are just another reminder how much you care for him.

Though once he does...and the fact that a girl is cooking for him in the first place...and who is not his mom...and he said those things right after...it makes him incredibly shy and he WILL blush.

HE - JUST...kinda got flashbacks of his mom when he ate home-cooked food, so the thought didn't cross him mind, okay?! Shut up, Ace and Grim!

When you gaze at the stars...

Very hyped and determined boy!

A good boy! So good that he doesn't get why Trey and Idia are making such a fuss about the dance and outfits. It's an honor, is it not?

Will be confused by their embarrassment and turn to you, asking if their dances and clothes are too much. When you answer no, he turns to the other two and is like; 'See? (Name) doens't find it weird either.'

Trey just shakes his head while Idia is like dude

Idia might want you to NOT be anywhere near Deuce and kinda not-subtly pushes you away. 'Listen, heroine, if you're presence turns Spade into that 'childhood-friend-crush-guy-who'd do anything for you and becomes puppy - then don't. I don't need those vibes.'

????? What's he talking about??? (Childhood friend? You met Deuce at NRC just like Idia...)

Well, let's just say that you pop in here and there and ask about the wish-collecting state. Deuce would gladly tell you of his progress (no matter if good or not).

Wants you to watch and critique his dance. You might follow along, just so you can hold the long, long, long sleeves and silks of his outfit up so he won't trip again. It's like you become his second robe.

Will blush if you end up dancing too close.

With each meet-up you have Deuce will always ask you what your wish is! He's very eager to fulfill it!

What it truly is depends on you...but if it does involve going home, Deuce will unwittingly get saddened by it. Of course. This isn't really your home.

But even so...he promises he will do his best to make it come true. If Crowley cannot find a way, then Deuce will not only try his hardest to become a full-fledged honor student, but also a mage powerful enough to send you back home!

He says all of this and believes it. Nevertheless, he tries to bury his sadness of your inevitable departure deep within him. At least for tonight.

When you dance to a masquerade...

Deuce looks soooo good!

He looks so proud of himself and really admires the work put into the outfit!

You openly tell him he looks handsome! And he kinda clams up, face red.

Handsome? Not good, not nice, but handsome? Out of all the things you could have chosen, you choose to call him handsome?

O-oo-o-o-o-oo-oh...

Blushing profusely and avoiding your gaze he tries to regain his voice.

"O-Oh, you l-look..."

He struggles. Should he call you handsome too even if you are a girl? Would you like that? Or would that be too much? How does he think you look like anyway?

He looks back up to uh, get a look at you to know how he feels about your outfit and his head is swirling with thoughts.

Cool? Fitting? Cute? Dashing? Lovely? Handsome? Good????

Uh....

He doesn't know!

"Uh, thanks. You l-look...really nice, too. It suits you...everything kinda does."

(It is not meant as a pun if you are wearing a suit by the way, he's just dumb.)

Yet...he is honest when he means that everything suits you. The Helloween costume, the chef cook wear, the Yukata or Kimono...and now this. You look good whenever.

HIS HEART WILL MAKE EXTRA LEAPS IF YOU TELL HIM HE LOOKS LIKE A MUSKETEER!

HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS BUT YOU SMILE SO BRIGHTLY WHILE SAYING IT SO IT MUST BE GOOD???

yEP, his heart is skipping a beat when you explain that a musketeer is a hero. Him, a hero? A good guy, like the magic police? Not a delinquent? Oh, man.

Well, compliments aside, it is time to dance. Deuce practiced with Riddle but he'd like his first dance to be with you. On one hand to get into it first with someone he is comfortable with and trusts but also because he wants to.

Just know that he only practiced the waltz and knows no other. (Oh, there's just the waltz? Phew...)

Calms a bit down since he focuses on dancing well but when he looks back up to your eyes through the holes of your mask?

(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

(〃艸〃)

It'S even worse when he doesn't know where to put his hands (he does, Riddle showed him) but putting it on your waist? It's...a bit much.

Enough to make a delinquent like him blush.

And now as he looks up and sees your hands tightly holding the other...which isn't the first time you've done but here, in this very town, in this very hall, it feels different.

Deuce tries to enjoy this dance and he does. There are just new thoughts and feelings daring to distract him from time to time.

[lowkeyrobin]

MCYT ; you ride a bike

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu, nihachu, & quackity

warnings ; language

I love passenger princessing my mom on her trike so here's this

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

he's absolutely mortified to get on the back with you at first

you convince him to just ride him around the neighborhood nice and slow and he over time gets used to it because you suggest going short distances on it rather than taking a bus and stuff

he grows on it though

his helmet has some stickers on it, one literally says tommyinnit.store in bold font 💀💀💀

either holds on the sidebars thatre there for him to hold or around your waist

he finds the wind against him therapeutic

the butterflies when you turn around and ask if he's okay, especially when it's dark and cold

constantly snapping jack, freddie & tubbo pictures of him on your bike/riding around with you/where you go

posts a lot of pictures on his Instagram

most of them are you & the scenery

"do you wanna learn how to drive a bike?"

"no???"

he unironically loves shouting at shit drivers who cut you off or try to get you killed

"WATCH IT ASSHOLE! YOU ALMOST GOT US KILLED, USE A BLINKER NEXT TIME!"

loves going over bridges

if he has somewhere to be after a ride, he'll gladly show up with his hair a mess and ass hurting since you need to put a few more pounds of air in his seat LMAO

"okay, so-"

"Tommy, why are you limping?"

RANBOO

he's 50/50 on being scared and wanting to get on with you

they man up and just do it after lots of reassuring

so many pictures lmao

litters his helmet with stickers and white marker doodles

has a sticker of the boober particle + one that just says ranboo.fashion in comic sans

he finds the air against him very therapeutic

loves going down backroads and finding new restaurants

always taking pictures, mostly of you

loves wearing his R800 jacket cause it keeps him warm + free promo

makes "I'll jump off rn" jokes

likes spreading his arms out like an eagle and will yell over the engine LMAO

loves bumps even though they'll hurt immediately after

FREDDIE BADLINU

you ask if he wants to come and he shrugs with a yeah

his first ride was at night so he got to enjoy all the lights and night life

takes a bunch of pictures and videos and sends them to Bill or Tommy

changes his insta bio to "my biker partners passenger prince" + bonus points if that's how he softlaunches your relationship

convinces you to go through a drive thru

eating lunch in the sun was a 10/10, will do it again

takes some cute pictures at stops/lights where he's leaning onto you a bit and he holds the phone in front of you to get both of you

wears dumbass hoodies/jackets w the dumb shit on the back to make ppl look at him weird or smile a bit

he'll show up to Tommy's live show (part of the bit) with messy hair and come on stage and tommy will look at him confused

Freddie asks him what's wrong and tommy just points and circles around his hair and the crowd laughs

"I was with my partner"

cue the laughing

"wait what?" Tommy laughs

"we were riding around the city before we got here, sorry"

NIKI NIHACHU

she thinks it's so cool, trust me

but like Tommy, she's very nervous to get on at first

you take her for a little ride around a parking lot and she's like "Okay I liked that let's actually go now"

her helmet has all sorts of stickers on it, but they're placed to look cool

there's a snake hide looking one down the middle and some cool patterned ones on the sides

she loves the wind in her hair and the feeling of being free

loves taking pictures of the scenery and even using you as a model

loves posting those pictures online for her fans to see

her editor fans always edit the pictures you two take together when you're out and about and whatnot it's so cool

you custom made her a leather jacket that fit her aesthetic

and she's super attached to it

she'll change her insta bio to "that one biker chicks girlfriend" LMAO

she spoils you like you're the one with the large social media platform its adorable

ALEX QUACKITY

"SINCE WHEN THE HELL DID YOU RIDE A BIKE???"

he thinks it's really badass tho

he'll gladly jump on with you

he's honestly scared after getting on but loses the fear pretty quickly

lovesss holding his arms out like a bird it's so fun to him

constantly asking you to tighten his helmet LMFAO

he finds it really entertaining in general

although if he's not wearing a full face covering helmet and wearing one of the head covering ones, you'll have to listen to his wailing later

his hair isn't long enough to completely pull back and the wind obviously tangles it up bad

so you gotta sit him down and try and carefully like de-matte his hair

he loves taking pictures and posting them tho, especially ones of you LMAO

sometimes he'll go the extra mile to give it a corny caption too

you change his insta bio to "passenger prince of the year"

always feels a little special and giggly when you ask if he's okay, especially when it's getting darker and much colder

"I told you to just wear the-"

"I know! please just do it for me! it hurts!"

"either grow your hair out or wear the other, lex"

[genshin-squabbles-and-wobbles]

Heyy! I would like to request a few headcanons of alhaitham, scaramouche and xiao (separately) with a reader who is like, very nice and sweet but also super impulsive, so they're pretty much always dragging them into dumb shit (kinda like yoimiya but like more chaotic i suppose) if you end up writing this, thanks, and even if you dont, thanks anyway!

Hello my dear, yes I can! Thank you for submitting this cute request. :)

Alhaitham ╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗

At first he would find it annoying or just tiring. He would also nag at you about it and protest. Despite this, it's always your sweet and soft nature he would sign and give in. "A Sumeru Festival? Why? H-Hey wai-"

He would sometimes tell you that he is busy, or have things to do. If you were to get distracted and leave him mid way, he would leave and do his own thing or find a nearby area to sit and read.

Overtime, he would start finding it endearing and cute.

He would do little small experience to see what distracts you and what gets your attention and maybe even use it to his own advantage if needed.

If you were to come back to him with the things you got distracted by, he would sit patiently and listen and even look at the thing you got as you tell him about it. Whether he knows what it is or not, he would let you explain it to him.

"Ah, let me guess, did that stand with food catch your attention by any chance? I thought so. Well, I bought some of their food ahead of time, so here you go."

Eventually he would beat you at your own game, as he can see a pattern on what distracts you or makes you chaotic. Once he understands you and sees why these things catch your attention, he would actually enjoy watching you get distracted.

He will start finding it cute, as you always seem to get so excited and worked up over things.

Overall, he became a sucker for you and will NEVER admit it to you.

Scaramouche╔═.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.═╗╔═.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.═╗╔═.·:·.✧ ✦✧.·:·.═╗

Ah yes

This asshole

He would 100% nag at you, and call you annoying. He might even put a leash on you, so you can drag him as he is flying in the sky when you run around. Haha, nah I'm kidding. Unless...?

He would often call you out on it. "Why are you always going off when I look away for 2 SECONDS?"

However, your kind and loving personality makes him care for you, and worry for you when you go off on your own.

He is in denial of this of course.

At first, he would scold you for being annoying for it. Even leave you behind. However...over time

He would start scolding me by always saying. "Something could have happened to you, and I wouldn’t be able to protect you!"

If you kept doing it, he would stop scolding you and keep holding your hand, so if you went off, you would take him with you. Or he would use his flying powers to search for you.

If he knows some things will trigger your chaoticness, he would inform you about it since your nature grew on him and...

it's pretty nice to see someone so excited about everything in life when he lost that a long time ago. He starts becoming soft and loving to you because of that.

Maybe even spoiling you, and who knows. You might make him enter a new age of himself where he becomes chaotic and kind about everything around him.

Xiao ┌──❀̥˚───❀̥˚─┐┌──❀̥˚───❀̥˚─┐┌──❀̥˚───❀̥˚

He is totally cool with it. He truly does not mind it. In fact, you would catch him flashing a small smile at you as he watches you let your chaotic energy go.

You would often say his name when you go off on your own, so he knows where you are, as he would appear every time you chant his name excitedingly.

He enjoys your sweet and loving nature. As someone who had a rough life, it is very nice to see someone who seems to find interest and happiness in things.

He would often inform you about things that excite you, and would always accompany you to banquets, restaurants, festivals, and even doing quests with you.

It is just refreshing and nice to have someone like you by his side, you have truly become a soft spot for him.

You are someone who he is fiercely over-protective with and would protect you from anything that would crush your excited and chaotic nature.

Overall, he spoils you and makes your chaotic nature 10 times worse.

[squib-2006]

So I’ve finally got some of my thoughts on the new season in order and letting my self sit on it for a while

Dragons rising season 2 spoilers!!!!!

So first off holy shit this season has managed to completely wipe out any fears I had for season two. I’m a generally anxious person and am pretty naturally pessimistic about most things and was pretty anxious about season 2 because from the stuff shown in trailers and promotional vids it looked like a “Lloyd chosen one” plot line and I have a history of hating that kinda thing because it’s been beaten to death in ninjago at this point. While a bit of that was there I found it was done quite tastefully and didn’t overwhelm everything else story wise.

I felt that the pacing of the first 6-7ish episodes was a bit all over the place. Having the training arc and the Cole-Zane plot lines happen in the same episode with the pov switching back in forth felt a little bit off to me.

Sora and arins character arcs are shaping up to be pretty good. Soras more confident in her self than season one and she’s trying to help Arin but I feel like the whole using her elemental power to help Arin will backfire into her face. Arin’s insecurity and the whole how can I be useful if I don’t have an element I fell is being handled way better than the dumb kai arc in season 11(dw I will get to that when I get to kai) and it’s about on par with the Lloyd powerless plot from hunted. I am really excited to see what they do next and if Arin will be really mad at sora or not cuz like he’s super nice and stuff and I fell like he would be sad instead of mad.

Nya didn’t really have a lot going on personally except the stuff with Jay which I’m iffy on because so much of Nyas character in older seasons revolved around Jay and I just hope they don’t go back to that and let her character breath a bit.

In the topic of Jay I really really REALLY hope he isn’t evil. That the idea because it’s really out of character and they are already pushing my buttons with the lost memory crap because that’s something that I’ve rarely seen done well at all and it makes me very nervous and I just don’t like it. I do like that Jay just seems to be a guy who hates his job tho that’s fun.

I think the writers are just having fun with Zane and I think that’s cool. I do wanna punch the administration guy who said Zane isn’t a person because he is and he’s a bean and I will not allow this nobody to slander him.

It was nice to see more of Cole this season. I swear him and geo are so cute. The hand holding and the fact that they basically adopted two kids together is amazing and I am fully on board for this ship.

The villans were really interesting. I hope they keep up the quality with them because the mystery of ras’ master and wtf happened with jordana is really exciting. Cinder was intresting and as someone who has no interest in men what so ever I am kinda baffled at why so many people want this man but hey you do you. I do wonder what happened to ash tho. The member of the forbidden five looks interesting too and part of me is hoping that the leaked “evil jay” minifig is actually this guy just powered up cuz the color palette is similar enough and I just don’t want an evil jay.

Wyldfyre is amazing her whole leg being broken then sneaking on the ship to the exasperation of kai (like he would totally have pulled something like this a few seasons ago the hypocrite <3) and the others was so good. I am curious about her talk with egalt she mentioned one of her family members getting the wasting sickness but it can’t be heat wave cuz he seems fine so maybe she had more than one dragon guardian??? I do hope that Kai’s portal abduction does affected going into part 2 and that she bonds with nya and the others over it.

Egalt and rontu were very interesting to me and I’m glad they didn’t go the route of them being the actual creators of spinjitzu and kept the lore consistent I was slightly worried about that. Hope they come back in part 2 too.

Bonzle was a big surprise for me. I likes her personality in season 1 but I didn’t expect her to be so important. She’s really sweet and the scene with wu was great too.

And finally last but definitely not least, the best character in this entire show and my favorite comfort character to beat the shit out of

KAI

IT WAS SO FREAKING GOOD. I LITERALLY HAVE NOT BEEN THIS HAPPY WITH AN EPISODE SINCE SEASON 4 EPISODE 7 THE FORGOTTEN ELEMENT (iykyk) I was literately kicking my feet like a little girl and crying and screaming my head off to the point I woke up other family members. Him unlocking the rising dragon technique by having his sister help and being in harmony with his family is so fucking sweet and I cried like a little bitch it was so good. I am also so happy that they used his old hair and didn’t just slap a smaller version of his current hair onto him (tho I kinda wish they had used the fucked up custom hair that was in the older episodes but I doubt that model is even in their hands so whatever(side side note I love the fucked up hair so much it’s so stupid I love it and will forever miss it)) him being such a dad to wyld fire was so sweet and then using the rising dragon technique after he saw his family in danger was just perfect. I do kinda wish there was more of a dramatic reaction to him getting yeeted by ras into the portal (kinda like any of the other ninja “deaths/major injuries”) but im fine with what we got. Except I kinda hate that only nya has an outward reaction in the aftermath. No lloyd reaction no Cole reaction and nothing from Zane and it makes me mad because every other time a ninja had their moment there was a whole team reaction. But I’m feeling like that’s to nitpicky and there’s still ten more episodes to fix that so fingers crossed. But kai also encouraging bonzle to close the portal even if he’s trapped inside is such a kai thing and hit me like a truck. Also him calling bonzle kid dispite her being much much older than him is funny and sweet cuz Kai’s big brother/father figure side is coming through and it’s so sweet. And the ninja never quit line is so great I was sobbing even more after that. (Tho I don’t know why he said he got it from Lloyd when it would have made more sense to have it be from master wu cuz that’s where he learned it but eh whatever).

While im really happy about kai finally getting some well deserved angst im also very anxious about it too. This could be the perfect opportunity for the writers to just conveniently forget about him for a while and idk if i could sit through that. Kai is a huge part of why I watch ninjago and he’s always been handed the shortest stick character development wise and technically he never got his own focus season either (and no i dont count the pilots because that focused mainly on all the ninja and was only two episodes, i also don’t count season four because it was more a group season, and season 11 doesn’t count because he got a half baked b plot that sucked) I’m very worried that I will loose enjoyment in the show because I dropped the show out of disappointment after season 11 because A LOT of premonitional material made it seem like a kai season and I got my hopes up and was let down so much. I’m very cautious when getting excited about things involving kai in particular because of that and I’m just hoping the writers don’t fuck it up.

Ok that’s enough negativity for once. I’m so excited for more and am foaming at the mouth for more!

[crimeboys]

It wasnt mourninglamby :( but honestly mourninglamby doesnt know what they’re talking about so if they have the same opinions it doesnt even matter what they think tbh……. I just wish I was better at showing them evidence you know? I keep talking about the yes very selfish love cwilbur has for ctommy was still love for ctommy and there aint no way the mental turmoil cdream caused ctommy is worse than cwilbur being mentally ill and a bad role model… they called cwilbur a groomer ffs???? I wish I could tell them that’s wrong without losing again due to my lack of evidence because they can just shut it down by calling my interpretations of crimeboys fanon……. I’m honestly just rambling sorry cyrus

my bad that may have been my own personal demons... although it does make me desolate to know more people share this take. but im not exactly unfamiliar with media illiteracy in this fandom.

but tbh it's like fine you dont have to debate people online about their interpretations of characters i personally love to block and stew (and occasionally lose my cool or swagever) and write private metas bc well im not a super articulate person so i hate posting them online. but yeah listen if you see people making dumbass takes that are wildly insane such as c!wilbur groomed tommy, you never have to like. debate that person bc frankly they've gone to a level of reading into shit that you are probably not going to be able to unravel. write your own meta or complain to your friends. i personally do the second one bc i hate writing. but i can attempt a little bit.

cwilbur is a complicated man who a lot of people like to make simple, be that in a negative or positive way. there are far extremes of both interpretations of the character and they both drive me insane. he is a character who requires a lot of criticism and a lot of compassion, otherwise he gets lost in the extremes of "terrorist monster who wants to hurt everyone" or "big brother who wuvs his little brother and would never do anything to hurt him".

cdream is also a complex character but he has a simple goal. power. whether that power come from land or disc or a teenager all on his own, his goal is to be on top. things take an obvious shift from just being obsessed with power to being obsessed with having power over tommy, which dream has always had to some degree but that's bc he fixated on tommy's "troublemaking" ruining the server in the beginning. exile is where he began to just Enjoy fucking with tommy and lets himself want power over tommy for the sake of having power over tommy, nothing to do with control of the server.

both of them meant to hurt tommy. i dont disagree with the notion that wilbur was abusive toward tommy. i just think there is a very clear difference in the way wilbur treated him vs. the way dream treated him. specifically i think situationally, it is very clear that wilbur was in a godawful place when he started treating tommy and everyone else terribly. i think the notion that his abuse started before pogtopia is bullshit and an incredibly dumb read of the characters. wilbur was not secretly fucking evil during l'manburg. he was an asshole often because wilbur's an asshole (but so is tommy, which people who dont actually like his character but adore the fanon version of it like to ignore), but he didn't create l'manburg just to destroy it. he didn't created l'manburg just to hurt tommy and everyone he loves. he made a home for them and when that home was taken, he had a really fucking bad reaction to it.

there is no question that wilbur during this time period hurt the people he loves. but i also think acting like every single thing he did during this period of time was malicious is fucking strange. there is a very clear, obvious fucking steady decline from the moment eret betrays them in the final control room, to wilbur and tommy being exiled from the home they built together for each other, to wilbur and tommy trying to get their nation back, to wilbur watching schlatt onstage and realizing (thinking) he never can in a way that matters, to wilbur becoming a shaken up bottle of paranoia set to explode the second someone opens it. even the fucking pit, which was shitty and gross and makes me yell at the screen every time i watch it, had a cause and effect. wilbur who genuinely thinks technoblade is on their side and trusts not to kill tubbo, to running back to pogtopia and indignant about techno trying to come back, to realizing this reinforces his paranoia and that he was right all along isn't that amazing tommy he was right they can't trust anyone, to putting tommy and techno in the pit.

this isn't the most indepth bc well like i said i don't write meta. but i think my point is clear that overall, there is a very clear difference between isolating and hurting someone literally for fucking fun vs. being isolated by the country you built and having a paranoid episode that your brother is in the front lines for that irrevocably changes both of you.

i think not liking cwilbur is fair enough, he has done undeniably shit things and hurt a lot of people without really making up for it, but i think refusing to engage with his character outside of the surface level is incredibly annoying, especially when you refuse to do that but include your own personal hcs and pretend they're honest interpretations of what you actually watched instead of separate characters you invented in your head.

dsmp might be a mess and people might think they "did more heavy lifting than the creators" but at the end of the day, they gave us very clear groundwork and tons of content and i don't think any of the lifting we have done is actually all that revolutionary to the characters outside of like. fanart. usually the people who do aren't writing the characters anymore. or maybe it's their first fandom and they don't realize it's very normal to have a bunch of hcs and character reworkings. but that's a little off topic.

anyway i could ramble about all this forever so i'm gonna go before i'm too mean and late to work byeee.

[crushedsweets]

I loved the ask about ticciwork what it would be like if they were able to date! Now I was wondering what that would be like with Jack and Toby!

Though I’m not sure if they have the same chemistry as ticciwork. 😭

Btw you have forever engraved ninakate to my soul LMAO I love them so much!! ❤️

I ABSOLUTELY CAN i think theyre super cute + i have a really sweet ticcijack ask i wanna draw soon. im gonna go off on a tangent about their upbringing and how that'd impact their sexuality tho, cuz i think that'd be relevant .

this was written more like notes for a one-shot of them getting together, rather than the format i did for ticciwork

ok. so for starters, toby has a huge wall to get over. i dont really have sexuality hcs for many of the creeps (jane and kate r lesbians, lius a gay man, ninas bi are my only concrete hcs) BUT i know toby's upbringing involved his dad constantly demeaning him for being 'feminine' (anytime he did something with lyra), a pussy, calling him slurs, telling him to man up, insulting any gay man he might see on tv, etc. and toby hates his dad, so he'd have an easy time being like 'ok whatever old man like i give a shit if a guy fucks a guy' BUT he would still feel a ton of guilt and shame if he were attracted to a guy.

jack might be a little similar, not because his dad was constantly berating him, but he still grew up in a pretty traditional house and his uncles/cousins would often tease him cuz he liked to cook and bake and had a lot of empathy. but he also went to university, and while it was still in alabama, a lot of colleges and stuff are a lot more progressive so it wasn't something he dwelled on much. live and let live, basically

AND AS A RESULT, it would be MUCH harder for either of them to make a move. toby would push any feelings down so fucking fast, and jack would just shrug it off and say he doesn't have like.. the "right" to have such emotions. after all he's done.

but they've also had a ton of intimate moments. the amount of times toby's been sat in his boxers while jack has to stitch up his stomach is kinda obnoxious. the amount of times jack checks toby's temperature and scolds him for dumb shit. toby scoffing and grabbing jacks wrist to pull his hand off, but his touch lingers

jack wears his mask a lot, but toby would make a comment. "i wanna see what you look like. it cant be THAT bad." and then jacks like ? asshole. so toby backtracks and is like "ok but if it is bad, thats kinda cool" and jacks like 'dude shut up'. but then toby would try and go on about 'im serious man you're over here stitching me up every other week and im practically the only person you talk to. let me see' and jack thinks about it. maybe not that day, but eventually he would.

if toby has already kinda come to terms with liking guys, OR he's so oblivious to his own feelings, he might say something stupid like "oh shit you're hot dude why do u wear that stupid ass mask" and jack would get embarrassed. and try to put it back on, but toby would snatch it and toss it on some counter and say "ok well now i know so stop wearing it" and jacks like. ok. fuck you. fine.

and toby stares a lot. like. a lot a lot. and jack kind of knows. the echolocation and thermavision helps him know toby's head is turned his way, but he can't exactly pinpoint where toby's eyes are. but he keeps turning away

toby would eventually just ask 'you gotta know im looking at you , right?' and jack is like ...well i thought so. thanks for confirmation. and toby laughs it off but jack is getting embarrassed

jacks feelings would develop slowly and he'd recognize every single moment he feels something. tobys would develop more rapidly, but he has no fucking idea what he's feeling is romantic. he thinks jacks attractive as fuck, he likes intelligent people, he likes how jack challenges tobys toxic ass mindset (only after the fact, hates it in the moment), and jack does a lot for him. patches him up, cooks him good meals.

the ask i mentioned said something about jack touching toby's lip and toby keeps looking at jacks lips and theres crazy tension etc etc etc. i genuinely dont know who would kiss who first.

if it were jack, toby would sit there kinda stunned, and jack would pull away and fumble out an apology. then toby tells him to do it again. and again, and again.

if it were toby, jack would immediately kiss back. he's had it on his mind for a long time, but genuinely didnt think anything would come.

toby would ask what now. he wants jack to set some sort of guidelines. he hates rules but holy shit does he not know how to navigate this, not with jack. jack would shrug it off and theyd try not to talk about it. toby might not come back to see jack for a while, but end up really hurt and dragged there to get his arm popped back into place. and jack would have to ask why he stopped visiting.

toby would admit it, finally. something about 'because i fucking like you and its really fucking weird and i dont wanna ruin the whole medic patient pal thing we got going on but this entire fucking time ive been avoiding you, im thinking about you a hundred times more'. and jack would ask why he thinks its weird. and theyd talk for a while

jack would ask toby if he could kiss him again, and toby would say yes.

[nnnyxie]

Hcs about the Rise boys with a younge rsister who is totally like nimona??

Punk music, always thinking about action, super into manipulating and robbery, whines every time one of the brothers knock out an enemy “how come you got to kill them??” <- an actual line from the movie- And basically yeah lol.

please and thank you so much!! Don’t forget to take breaks and take good care of yourself!!

okay so i haven’t watch nimona yet BUT i will do my absolute best at trying to embody her

(aka i did research and i’m praying it was enough)

raphael ;

your relationship with raph is so !!

you respect him so much— like seriously!!! when they first found you, you were very intimidated by him, which made you dislike him.

but overtime you realized he was just a softy that could get mean when needed.

and honestly?? you respected that.

it’s like with mikey— complete opposites but besties!!

you hold him on such a high pedestal, he’s kind of your idol (strength wise mainly).

he’s always saying ‘remember no killing!’ and ‘you cannot kill that guy for not liking your outfit!’.

he’s the cool older brother and you love him!!

donatello ;

now. you’d think that you and donnie would get along great considering you’re both yk… borderline murderers/psychopaths!

but… y’all fight ALL. THE. TIME.

it’s always over who gets to fight which person and who gets dibs on killing ‘knocking out’ said person.

poor raph ALWAYS has to break up your fights. the fights are to the point where it gets PHYSICAL.

BUUUT!! there are times where the two of you get along.

usually it’s when it’s super late and you both are very sleep deprived and running on 16 cups of coffee!

but hey, a win is a win i guess???

leonardo ;

urgh leo… i feel like this is a very one sided hateship (if that makes sense?).

like, you love hate him and his dumb, corny jokes but he adores you!! he adores his little sister!! he’ll shower you in affection like he does w/ the others!!

all the hugs, head-locks, knuckle rubs (i think that’s what they’re called), etc etc.

he just adores you and really doesn’t care if you want to curb stomp him into oblivion (don’t look up curb stomping, just know that it’s violent).

your relationship with him is almost like his and donnie’s except donnie doesn’t actually want to stab him sometimes.

thoughhhh there are times where you’ll show him some love, whether that’s in the form of not attacking him for a few days or silently laughing at one of his terrible one-liners.

michaelangelo ;

first of all—

you and mikey?? complete opposites but absolute besties!!

i feel like he’d see you try to do some dumb illegal shit but immediately go ‘no no no! let’s not do that!’ and pull you away—

he has to talk you out of a LOOOT of illegal things. like. A LOT.

one time you tried breaking into the empire state and almost killed a guard……… mikey thankfully followed you and stopped you!! (why did you try to break in? i haven’t the slightest clue!)

it just fits!!

you’d lay your life on the line for him!! honestly who wouldn’t??? just because he’s too good for this world doesn’t mean he should leave it!!

plus, you and doctor delicate touch are such a duo when need be.

OMG ALSO!!! i feel like you two would totally vibe to bratmobile, bikini kill, le tigre, jack off jill, & just so many riot grrl (fem led punk) bands!!!

y’all are just THE duo!!!!

pls i hope i got her personality correct dkgsldna

also!!! i hope you liked this :)

[ninjadeathblade]

Shopping Trip (Lego Monkie Kid fanfic)

Summary: The majority of the gang goes shopping. Then Wukong and Macaque play video games.

Warnings: Brief threats, Wukong and Macaque have issues to work through (they're also very dumb about the fact they love each other), swearing

Word count: 6,072

Author's notes: This would NOT leave me alone so here fandom, take the gays residing in my brain for the last two days. Sandy isn't here because I had no idea what he'd be doing. This is 90% indulgent Shadowpeach content for myself but hey, that's something. This is set post Emperor's Wrath. Enjoy.

“Hey, Monkey King, why d'you always wear your fancy robes?” MK questioned after the three of them took a break from training.

Macaque stifled a laugh, looking over at Wukong and revelling in the confusion on his face.

“What do you mean?” Wukong asked around a mouthful of peach flavoured crisps, crunching noisily on them.

MK shrugged and gestured. “You and Macaque always wear your fancy clothes whenever you come and just hang out with us, you can't be comfortable in it.”

“Look, kid, I hate to break it to you but we don't actually own any other clothes,” Macaque replied.

“I can make some though!” Wukong exclaimed, one hand already reaching to yank hair out of his head.

MK and Macaque rushed to stop him, the former tackling his hand still holding the bag of crisps, while the latter reached through a shadow portal to grab his wrist.

“Quit it Wukong, you already eat enough of your hair as it is, no point in you wearing it as well,” Macaque said with an eye roll.

MK’s eyes went round as saucers. “Please tell me that those crisps aren't hair.”

Wukong averted his gaze with a nervous laugh. “Whaaaaat? No, pfft, I'm not that- er-”

“Monkey King! You promised to start eating proper food!” MK whined, poking him in the cheek.

Wukong sighed. “Yeah yeah, I am, kid, I promise, now can I have my arms back?”

Macaque glared at him over MK's head, getting a returning glare.

MK gasped and jumped up, waving his arms wildly. “Oh my gosh, I know just what we should do?”

“Yuh-huh and what's that?” Wukong asked.

“Mei keeps telling me about this super cool new shopping centre that opened up the other week!” MK explained. “What if we all had a day out there and you guys can pick out some comfy clothes for hanging out with us?!”

Macaque shook his head. “Look, kid, I appreciate it but-”

He went silent as something yanked his tail, head whipping around to catch another tail quickly retreating to Wukong's side.

Oh that little-

“It's an amazing idea!” Wukong replied with a grin. “Let us know when you want to do it and we'll be there.”

“Funny how you now speak for both of us,” Macaque muttered, opening up a shadow portal beside him and reaching through to yank Wukong's tail.

The king turned to glare at the warrior, Macaque shooting him a shit-eating grin in return.

“Okay! I'm gonna go, I'm working this evening but I'll see you guys for training again tomorrow!” MK said before beginning to run back down the mountain. “Thanks again for the training!”

A beat went by before the two of them turned to each other.

“You know you could be more supportive of the kid,” Wukong snapped.

“Me? Really? Last I checked you were the one who abandoned his training!” Macaque argued, standing up. “Because that's what you always do isn't it? The great Sun-Wukong who always puts himself first.”

Wukong's jaw clenched, tail lashing behind him, and for a moment it seemed like they were going to fight again.

Then the king's shoulders heaved and his posture slouched. “Can we not do this right now?”

Macaque rolled his shoulders, the joints clicking slightly. “Running off again?”

“Can you stop?!” Wukong shouted. “I don't know what you want from me but you're not gonna get a rise. I'm done with this - with you always trying to bait me into another fight. I have people to look out for now.”

Macaque scoffed. “You can't tell me you actually care about the kid.”

“Bold words from someone who also cares about him,” Wukong retorted and Macaque's fur bristled. “Oh yeah, don't think I haven't noticed. While I was off doing very important things, you kept showing back up. Some part of you does actually care about MK, be honest.”

“Nope, doesn't sound like me,” Macaque stated, tail tapping against the ground twice as he opened up a shadow portal. “See you around, Monkey King.”

Wukong dashed forward, one arm outstretched. “No, wait, Macaque-”

The darkness surrounding him.

Silence.

Well, it wasn't quite silent, it sounded like everything was muffled and underwater.

Macaque took a deep breath, artificial air expanding his lungs.

Wukong was still there although it was like seeing him through murky glass, thumping a fist against the shadows on the ground before giving up and walking away.

Macaque floated in the inky expanse, debating on whether or not to return to his dojo before deciding that he would just stay here for now.

It was peaceful.

It was everything that outside wasn't.

~•~

“Hey boi!” Mei cheered, tackling MK into a hug before waving at Wukong. “Heya Monkey King!”

“Hey,” Wukong waved, pulling his loaned hoodie further over his head. “Hey bud, you sure that no one's gonna recognise me in this?”

“I dunno honestly but if not you can transform, right?” MK argued.

“Fair point.”

“I still do not understand why I have to be here,” Red Son complained, foot tapping impatiently. “If we are all here then can we go already?”

“No, sorry, we're still waiting on someone else,” Tang answered.

“Who else are we waiting for?” Wukong questioned. “The pig guy?”

Tang adjusted his scarf. “Oh no, Pigsy is at that food stall over there shouting at the chef because he sold us half baked churros while we were waiting.” He paused. “Speaking of, I'm going to go stop Pigsy before he ends up in too much trouble.”

“Literally who else would MK invite?” Wukong's eyes narrowed in confusion. “I don't even understand why Red Son is here.”

“Hey!”

“I swear if you invited Nezha then this is going to be the most boring shopping trip ever.”

“Ugh, I wish he'd invited Nezha, then I'd have someone else to make fun of you with.”

Wukong spun around with a curse, glaring at their final arrival, who hadn't even bothered with a disguise.

“Great, just great.”

Macaque shrugged. “Hey, I don't want to be here any more than you want me to be here. Only reason I'm tagging along is that I was planning to grab some food anyway.”

“But we're meant to be clothes shopping,” Mei interrupted, eyes watery as she stared up at the warrior.

“Yeah Macaque, you promised,” MK added, also staring up with large eyes.

“Look kid I didn't-” The warrior paused and sighed. “Fine, I'll buy some clothes. But I'm picking what I get, not you guys.”

The two of them let out a cheer and rushed back over to Red Son, beginning to drag him in the direction of a shop.

“I cannot believe that I'm gonna have to put up with you today,” Wukong groaned as the two of them set off after the trio.

“Hey, you're the one who volunteered me for this so if there's anyone to blame it's yourself,” Macaque responded.

Mei and MK had seemed to immediately start piling clothes into their arms, occasionally thrusting some pieces into Red Son's arms.

Wukong stumbled backwards slightly when MK seemed to just appear in front of him, holding up two pairs of pyjamas. “Hey Monkey King! Should we get these matching Monkey King™ pyjamas?”

“Hey kiddo, I'm wearing a disguise for a reason so maybe keep your voice down,” Wukong chuckled. “But yeah, absolutely.”

The king turned to glare at Macaque when the warrior snickered.

“Something funny?”

“No, it's nothing,” Macaque lied, one hand coming up to try and cover the smile on his face.

Wukong let out a loud, over-dramatic gasp. “Are you making fun of my bond with my apprentice? Are you making fun of our super duper cool friendship?”

“No,” Macaque sputtered, trying to get his laughter under control.

Wukong leaned in, poking him in the face. “You are! How could you?”

Macaque stopped trying to contain his laughter at the theatrics, golden eyes screwing up tight as he nearly doubled over.

Wukong's smile wavered as his gaze flitted across the warrior's face.

He knew realistically why Macaque would cover up his eye.

Seeing his unmarred face and having these moments made it almost seem like nothing had ever gone wrong between them.

When Macaque straightened up again he shot Wukong a quick glance, accompanied with a shy smile before returning his attention to the shop in front of them. “C'mon then, no point standing around all day. Gotta find you something to wear other than pyjamas.”

“Yeah and we've gotta find you anything to wear,” Wukong teased. “What do you even wear? Like, leather jacket and grunge aesthetic boots.”

“How the fuck do you know what an aesthetic is?” Macaque swore, turning back to face him.

The king shrugged nonchalantly and grinned. “What can I say, I guess I'm just cool like the kids are.”

The warrior snorted. “Yeah right, the day that you're cool is the day I haven't died before.”

A silence fell between them at that comment and something flickered over Macaque's features.

Wukong reached out to him before the shadow slipped away from him, walking over to a rack of darkly coloured clothes.

There was so much they still needed to talk about.

Macaque flicked through the different hanging articles before smirking. “So, what about the fact that Red Son has a crush on either MK or Mei?”

“Wait, what?” Wukong spluttered.

“When the three of them were together back there, Red Son was blushing and stuff. Can't tell which of them is making him fall for them but I'm not actually that surprised.”

Wukong stood stock still for a moment, doing a mental reboot while Macaque moved on.

“Wait, no, hold on you little shit, are you for real?” Wukong questioned.

Macaque nodded. “When we catch up to them, just watch. I wouldn't lie, would I?”

“I dunno, seems like you lie a lot.” Wukong narrowed his eyes dubiously.

“Well, I'm not lying about that.”

They wandered for a little longer before managing to catch up with the trio.

Okay, Wukong had to hand it to Macaque, Red Son did seem to be blushing.

“Hey, Monkey King, you made it! We lost you back there!” MK cheered before turning back to Mei. “Ooh, Mei, do you still have the thing we picked out for Macaque?”

“Kid I don't-”

“Found it!” Mei announced, holding up the black mesh shirt.

Macaque's gaze dragged over it before extending a hand. “Okay, I'll try it on.”

Wukong did a double take. “You like mesh?”

“Haven't tried it before but it looks cool enough. If I can get something to go over it then I'd probably like it.”

Red Son held up a black sleeveless turtleneck shirt from the pile in his arms. “Something like this?”

Macaque shifted the first shirt in his grip before reaching out for the other. “Sounds good.”

“Oh and there are some dark coloured jeans by the changing rooms, wanna grab a pair of those?” MK offered.

“Mhm.”

Wukong trailed behind the bunch of them, briefly wondering where Tang and Pigsy had gotten to.

Him and MK plopped down onto a bench just outside the changing rooms, MK's stack of clothes beside him.

“I'm gonna try them on after the others have tried theirs,” MK explained. “Wait a minute, why don't you have anything Monkey King?”

“Um, well, I just didn't see anything I liked all that much, bud,” Wukong lied.

“Oh okay.”

The boy got out his phone, playing some obnoxiously loud game while they waited for the others to get changed.

“Okay, we're done!” Mei called after a while.

“Come out then!” MK shouted back, shutting his phone off and putting it back in his pocket.

“Macaque, you coming?”

“Nope.”

“Aw, come on, pretty please? You look great!”

“...Fine.”

Mei stepped out, practically dragging Red Son and Macaque with her.

And wow, Macaque actually looked kind of good.

The clothes actually suited him.

The warrior wrenched Mei's iron grip off his arm before grumpily crossing his arms over his chest.

“Woah, you guys look awesome!” MK gasped, clapping his hands together.

Macaque rolled his eyes and frowned when he looked over at Wukong. “Quit staring, Wukong, don't you know it's impolite?”

Wukong smirked. “Thought you said I was impolite.”

“Yeah, I know that you are. Doesn't mean you have to give me more reasons for it,” the warrior complained before looking over at Mei. “Hey, can we wrap this up and buy this stuff already?”

“Nu-uh, we've still got loads of outfits to try on! You and Monkey King can wait here while we finish checking all these sick clothes out,” Mei replied.

Macaque grumbled something under his breath before going back to the changing room.

Three pairs of eyes turned to Wukong. “He's just always kinda cranky, trust me.”

“I heard that!”

~•~

“Ugh, how much sugar did you even put in that thing?” Macaque asked, nose wrinkling with disgust at the sweet scent coming off of Wukong's drink.

Wukong moved the glass away from his face, a bit of cream smeared on his nose. “Um, I dunno. It has chocolate, ice cream, sprinkles, some more chocolate, some normal cream, some kinda sweet milk, caramel-”

Macaque reached out and grabbed the drink out of his hand while he was distracted listing ingredients, holding it out of his reach. “You are going to clog an artery if you have that much sugar.”

Wukong pouted. “Macaque! Gimme back my drink!”

Macaque opened up a shadow portal under his hand, hovering the drink just above it. “You aren't going to have all of it to yourself or you will die.”

“I'm immortal, I can't die,” Wukong retorted.

Oh yeah.

“You aren't going to have it all to yourself or I'll steal all the wine you're hiding at your place.”

Wukong's eyes went wide and he leaned across Macaque, desperately attempting to grab it. “No! No! Fine, I'll share! Just gimme the drink!”

Macaque dropped the drink through the shadow portal, watching as Wukong's face fell.

As the king turned back to the table the warrior opened a portal again, depositing the drink - now with two straws - back in front of him.

“Come on, if you're going to clog an artery then I might as well do it with you.”

Wukong shot him a quick glare but moved the glass so it was between them.

Red Son slid back into their booth. “They're still ordering but wanted me to say they'll be back soon.”

Macaque glanced over to the counter where Mei and MK seemed to be arguing over the menu of sweet treats.

“May I ask a question?” Red Son asked.

“You just did,” Wukong teased.

The boy rolled his eyes. “May I ask another question after the one I am asking at this moment?”

“Mmmmkay.”

Macaque lowered his head to take a sip of the drink, throat burning at how sickly sweet it was.

He'd never understand how Wukong could stomach these things.

“Are you two in a relationship?”

Macaque choked on his drink and Wukong hit him on the back a few times while replying.

“No, never! Me? With him? Tch, as if! He's so- him! And I'm so me!” The king answered.

Macaque gulped in a lungful of air after recovering. “This is the one time we agree on something and it's that we are not a thing. I hate him, he makes me feel like my skin is on the outside and my fur is on the inside. I'd rather have my heart served up on a platter to the Lady Bone Demon than go out with him.”

“Ew, did you have to be so graphic?” Wukong complained. “You're gonna put me off my drink.”

“Good. It tastes like shit.”

“Because you have no tastes.”

“I do have tastes. Anyway, you seemed to conveniently leave out the fact that this drink is peach flavoured.”

Wukong shrugged and smiled. “It's my favourite.”

“You sure you didn't make this out of your hair?” Macaque questioned, lip curling in disgust.

Red Son huffed. “No, I paid for his drink. And there's no need for you two to be so defensive.”

“We're back!” MK announced, flopping down against Red Son's side. “What did we miss?”

“Ah, yes, you are back,” Red Son flustered.

Macaque and Wukong shared a look.

So that's who Red Son liked then.

“Duh, that's what I just said,” MK laughed.

“We ordered every dessert they had!” Mei announced.

“Oh no,” Macaque whispered.

“Oh yes,” Wukong purred, eyes lighting up. “Desserts for everyone!”

The warrior dropped his head to rest against the table, grimacing at how sticky it seemed to be. “Why did I ever let myself be dragged along here?”

“Because you're our friend!” MK said.

“Greeaaaat.”

~•~

“Omg, these stationary sets are so naturecore, I have to have them for my aesthetics blog,” Mei gasped.

Wukong nudged Macaque to grab his attention before whispering. “Hey, d'you have any idea what that means?”

“No idea,” Macaque admitted. “As established earlier, I know aesthetic but that's about it.” The warrior smirked. “Aren't you the one who's ‘cool like the kids are’?”

“Shuddup,” Wukong laughed.

Macaque's tail flicked up to hit him in the back of the head before looking around. “So, we kinda lost Pigsy and Tang at the start.”

“Yeah, it'll be fine,” the king replied calmly, waving it off.

“Maybe for you. I for one would like to not be on kid sitting duty for the next decade.”

“It's only been two hours,” Wukong stated, snickering at the defeated groan Macaque let out. “What's wrong? Too old to keep up?”

“Wha- no,” Macaque denied sourly before continuing. “My feet hurt though. I'm not used to walking around this much. Usually I just use my shadows to get places.”

Wukong sighed before holding out his arms.

The warrior stared blankly at him.

“Climb on, I'll carry you,” the king offered.

Macaque immediately began to walk away from him. “Nope, nu-uh, never happening, find someone else prince fucking charming.”

“Come on Macaque, your pride won't be that wounded if you let yourself take a break,” Wukong whined, following him.

The shadow’s tail lashed behind him as he walked through the aisles of the shop, trying to catch up to wherever the other three had run off to. “I'll take a break when I get home later. Feet being sore isn't the worst thing I've had to deal with.”

Unspoken words hung between them and Wukong followed Macaque silently until they reached the trio, staring at row upon row of cards.

“Hey guys, whatcha looking at?” Wukong inquired, propping his head on MK's shoulder.

“We're helping Mei pick out a card for her dad's birthday,” MK explained.

“You could make one,” Red Son added. “Although didn't you say it's tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Mei groaned. “I was so busy helping MK train that I forgot.”

“You forgor,” MK said.

“I forgor,” Mei affirmed.

Wukong straightened back up, whispering. “What language is this?”

“No idea,” Macaque said.

“No idea what?” Mei asked.

“Nothing.”

“‘kay.”

Wukong smiled at Macaque.

The shadow returned it with a small quirk of his mouth.

It wasn't much but it was better than it had been.

~•~

“That's it, I am not being dragged into a spa, I'm calling Pigsy,” Macaque said, digging his phone out his pocket.

“You have Pigsy's number?” Wukong asked beside him before continuing. “You have a phone?”

“Yeah, and?” Macaque tapped onto his contacts. “Got Pigsy's number after the kid crashed out at my place one time. Also he makes good noodles.”

“I know right?” Wukong agreed, mouth practically watering.

“Hello! Pigsy's Noodles, how can I-”

“Cut the crap Pigsy, your kids are trying to drag me into a spa and I know that you and Tang are still somewhere in this shopping centre.”

“Oh fuc- okay, where are you guys, I'll come and get ‘em,” Pigsy sighed.

“Seventh floor, top right corner, next to the arcade place.”

“Wait, there's an arcade place next door and they chose to go to the spa instead?” Tang questioned.

“Red Son is trying to convince us all to get princess pamper sessions before we get wrecked and lose all our money to useless games,” Macaque explained.

“That'd do it. We'll be there in a few.”

Macaque hung up, quirking an eyebrow at Wukong's sad expression. “What do you want now?”

“You're gonna ruin their fun,” Wukong complained, gesturing at where the three others were currently crashed out on a bench.

“No, I'm just getting us the rest of the evening off,” Macaque argued.

When Wukong still looked upset he sighed.

“If I play your shitty game this evening will that make it up to you?”

Wukong brightened up. “Yes! Although it isn't shitty, take that back.”

“Maybe. Depends on how good your game is.”

Macaque looked over at the trio. “Hey, Red Son, a word.”

The boy seemed sheepish as he walked over, a sharp contrast to his usual confident demeanour. “Yes?”

“You break MK’s heart and I'll break all your bones,” Macaque snarled quietly.

“Okay so you're just coming out with it,” Wukong muttered.

“P-pardon?” Red Son stuttered, hair letting off embers.

“You aren't subtle. So you heard me. If you break his heart, I will break all your bones.”

Red Son swallowed thickly. “Y-yes sir.”

“Good.”

MK walked up beside them. “What're you guys talking about?”

“We were just saying goodbye,” Wukong supplied, somehow having come up with a good excuse for once in his long life.

“Oh cool. I'm sleeping around Red Son's tonight so won't be able to make it to training tomorrow, is that okay?” MK said.

Macaque subtly shot Red Son a glare while he replied to MK. “That's fine, see you in a few days kid.”

The warrior opened up a shadow underneath himself and the king.

“No, no, no, no, no, not the shadow portal!”

~•~

“Ugh, I think I'm gonna throw up,” Wukong complained as he dropped out of the shadow portal.

“Too bad, you fly your cloud recklessly and the shadows are quicker,” Macaque replied, dropping down beside him before opening up their shared bag of shopping purchases and grabbing out a handful of clothes. “I'm gonna get changed then I'm ordering actual food for dinner.”

“But my way is cheaper!”

“Yeah, and it'll have you hacking up furballs until your eventual death, Wukong,” Macaque snorted, shutting himself into the bathroom.

Wukong rooted around in the bag and grabbed out one of the plain shirts he'd picked out, slipping off his robes and putting on the black t-shirt before grabbing a pair of loose blue jeans out of the bag.

The king settled down on the sofa, aimlessly flicking through channels on his TV until his tail brushed against someone else.

Wukong lifted his head up, staring at Macaque.

The warrior practically had a halo of light around his head from the setting sun behind him, a sliver of yellow fabric visible under his dark hoodie.

“Hey. You up for burning off some energy?” Macaque proposed and Wukong was in his feet within seconds.

“We haven't fought in ages,” Wukong sceptically tested.

Macaque shrugged. “Nothing serious. But I need to stretch out my limbs and test how flexible I am in these clothes.”

Wukong dragged his eyes up and down Macaque. “Mhm, because ripped jeans are gonna be sooo easy to move around in. Prepare to be beat.”

Macaque smirked, sweeping out one leg and knocking Wukong off balance.

“H-hey! No fair!” Wukong growled, reaching up and tugging Macaque down with the edge of his hoodie.

The warrior let out a squeak, collapsing down beside the king before going still.

“Oh shit. Macaque? You good, bud?” Wukong questioned, moving closer.

Macaque spun around, hands catching Wukong's and pinning them against the floor. “I cannot believe you just fell for that.”

“Yeah, well, it's been years since you played that card while we've fought,” Wukong argued, one leg kicking out and into Macaque's stomach.

The warrior's grip on his hands loosened, allowing the king to flip the two of them over as he hovered over him.

His hands closed around Macaque's, mimicking the move just used on him.

“Not so cocky now, huh?” Wukong challenged.

Macaque just laughed and rolled his eyes, opening up a shadow portal underneath himself.

Wukong pulled back, watching as the other sank into the floor and disappeared before a weight crashed down on his back.

“Fuck! Macaque!”

“Got you now,” Macaque taunted, the two of them rolling back and forth until Macaque pinned Wukong down.

The warrior was just shy of sitting on him, chest heaving as he breathed.

Wukong sighed. “Yeah, alright Mac, you win, now get off of me.”

The shadow paused, golden eyes staring at him.

“What?” Wukong inquired.

“You haven't called me Mac since- since before,” Macaque stated, his grip on Wukong's hands loosening.

Orange and pink hues of light shone off of his dark fur.

It was beautiful.

He was beautiful.

“No, no I guess not,” Wukong murmured.

Macaque rolled onto the floor beside him, both of them staring up at the ceiling.

“So, if Red Son does break MK's heart we are absolutely going to ruin his life, right?” Macaque questioned.

Wukong rolled onto his side, staring at Macaque.

Tufts of dark hair stuck up in different directions, framing his face.

The king reached out with a hand before hesitating when the warrior flinched, eyes closing.

A long moment passed, before Macaque quickly got up, with a mumbled sentence. “I'm going to order dinner.”

“Yeah, okay,” Wukong responded, mentally kicking himself.

Of course Macaque still didn't trust him, why should he?

After everything Wukong had done, he had no reason to.

“Hey, Wukong, how many portions should I order you?” Macaque asked, one hand muffling the bottom of his phone.

“Three, if that's okay,” Wukong answered.

Macaque nodded before continuing to quietly speak to whoever was on the other end of the line.

Wukong walked back over to the sofa, sitting down and trying to avoid looking at his friend.

Huh.

When had he started thinking of Macaque as a friend again?

The other side of the sofa dipped as weight settled down on it.

“I'm sorry for flinching,” Macaque whispered. “Really going against my therapy goals.”

Wukong blinked before looking over at him. “You go to therapy?”

Macaque's tail wrapped across his chest, curling over his opposite shoulder. “Well, I'm trying. Kind of hard though when most therapists are mortal and I have issues with opening up about things from my past.”

The shadow let out a deep breath before slowly relaxing against the king's side. “Is… is this okay?”

“Yeah, no, of course,” Wukong flustered a bit, shifting so that Macaque would be more comfortable.

Wukong turned so his back was resting against the arm of the sofa, one arm circling around Macaque's waist.

The warrior tensed under his touch slightly before relaxing back against him, pillowing his head on the king's chest. “You sure you're okay with this?”

“Geez Mac, I'm fine,” Wukong responded. “Are we gonna start playing my game now or d'you want to wait until after dinner?”

“After dinner. I want to get some rest in,” Macaque sighed, opening up a shadow portal over the top half of his head. “I'll wake up when the food gets delivered, I'll hear it. You should get some rest too.”

“Yeah alright. You get some rest.”

“Thanks Wukong.”

“No problem bud.”

~•~

Macaque's ear flicked inside the portal as footsteps ran up to the door of his dojo.

“Hold on,” he murmured to Wukong, unsure whether his friend was even awake before sitting up and slipping his upper body through the shadow portal.

“Knock knock!” The delivery boy shouted as Macaque reached over to open the door.

MK grinned and held up the couple of bags in his arms. “Hey Macaque! This is more than you usually order.”

“Yeah, well, I've got company,” Macaque said evasively.

“Is it Monkey King?”

“Nah, I have other friends,” Macaque lied, reaching out with one hand for the bags. “Aren’t you meant to be staying around Red Son's?”

“Yeah, I'm headed there after this,” MK explained.

“Have a good sleepover, kid.”

“You too Macaque!”

“No, kid, I'm not having a-”

“Bye Macaque!”

The shadow sighed, shutting and locking his door before slipping back through the portal to Wukong's house.

The king was still passed out on the sofa, snoring at an obnoxious volume.

Or perhaps it was actually quiet, and Macaque's sensitive hearing was getting to him more than usual.

“Hey, wake up.”

Wukong blinked awake, sitting up before his mouth watered at the sight of the takeaway bags. “Oh yes.”

Macaque rolled his eyes but passed over the three portions Wukong had asked for. “You know, if you keep eating that many portions then you're going to get fat.”

Wukong let out an offended gasp before shovelling some of the noodles into his open mouth. “No I'm not.”

“You are,” Macaque replied, teasingly poking him on the stomach. “See? Round.”

“It's cushioning. For when I may somehow end up on the floor,” Wukong explained.

“Because I beat you up,” Macaque snickered, opening up his own meal while Wukong began to dig into his second.

“Shuddup.”

“Make me,” Macaque challenged, tail lashing behind him.

Wukong's golden gaze flitted across him before he went back to his meal.

“That's what I thought.”

After they'd finished their meal, Macaque let out a sigh. “Alright then, put on your crappy game.”

“It's not crappy!” Wukong protested, already digging through the piles of DVDs in front of his TV. “Alright, found it. Get ready for the best game you'll ever play.”

“I highly doubt it,” Macaque mumbled, nearly dropping the headset and controller thrown haphazardly in his general direction.

“What was that?”

“I said ‘I highly doubt it’,” Macaque deadpanned. “This won't be anywhere near as good as my game.”

“You have a game?” Wukong laughed, plopping back down on the sofa beside him. “Okay, that I have to play after you're done with this.”

Macaque let out a grumble but adjusted the headset before putting it on, slouching against Wukong's side as the game registered him in.

An avatar looking surprisingly like him loaded in on a dirt path, a chicken running out of a bush in front of him before glitching and dying.

“Wow. What a surprise, I was right, this game sucks,” Macaque huffed.

The king's tail flicked up to curl around the warrior's arm. “Aww, c'mon Mac, give it a chance at least.”

Macaque sighed but began to walk his character along the path, stopped only a second later as another character spawned in front of him.

“Welcome traveller, on your journey to the west!” The Monkey King greeted.

The background image switched so the character was pointing at himself. “As the Great Sage equal to Heaven, you couldn't ask for a better tutor.” The screen switched back to the first picture of him. “On your journey, you will learn to smite powerful enemies.”

God this was boring.

“After you complete the tutorials, you will learn how to access your hidden potential.”

Ugh, good, back to the overworld.

Now if he could just-

“Defeat each opponent to work your way up to the final boss, the Rhino King,” Monkey King said.

“Couldn't afford the rights for Demon Bull King?” Macaque joked, elbowing Wukong in the side.

“Nah, just seemed boring seeing as I already beat him.”

“Here are seventy two combos-”

Skip.

“Pay attention-”

Skip.

“Make many friends along the way,” Monkey King advised and Macaque tore off his headset.

“What the fuck is that background art?!” The shadow screamed.

The king grinned. “Flattering, right? You would not believe how quickly the game sold out.”

“That's atrocious!” Macaque shouted, hitting him on the head before putting the headset back on.

Yeah, no, he was skipping through all of this.

Eventually it let him go and unlock abilities.

“Hey, these are all passive,” Macaque pointed out.

“Just give it a moment,” Wukong instructed.

The monk on the screen sighed before it flicked to a different ability menu.

Macaque's eyes roved over the screen before he took off the headset.

“Really?”

“What?”

“A fucking muscle bro version of yourself in just pants taking up half the screen?” Macaque growled because it was very obvious why he was pissed.

Wukong smirked. “What? I think it's a good view.”

“Self obsessed asshole,” Macaque grumbled, trying to just focus on buying a couple of different attacks before giving up and handing the game controller and headset over to Wukong. “No, I can't do this, this is just something for you to admire yourself.”

“Fiiiiine,” Wukong groaned. “But I want to play your game now.”

Macaque opened up a shadow portal, sticking his arm in and rooting around. “Seriously though Wukong, are you trying to seduce the player or something?”

Wukong grinned slyly at him. “Are you saying I'm hot?”

Macaque's face screwed up. “...No.”

“That's it, the Six-eared Macaque thinks I'm hot!” Wukong shouted before getting up and racing to the entrance of his house and cupping his hands around his mouth. “The Six-eared Macaque thinks that Sun-Wukong, Great Sage equal to Heaven, is hot!”

“Shut up,” Macaque said, withdrawing his hand and tossing the game case to Wukong as he walked back over.

“It looks like it was made by a five year old mortal,” Wukong giggled but put the disc in anyway.

When the king settled back down on the sofa, the warrior stretched out, laying his upper body across his friend's lap.

“And what do you think you're doing?” Wukong questioned before slipping the headset on.

“Making myself comfy.”

“Yeah yeah, I'm gonna beat this game in minutes.”

A moment passed as the game loaded.

“Why does everything look like a crappy anime?” Wukong inquired.

“Fuck you.”

~•~

“This is the fourth time I've done this encounter and I still haven't beaten it!” Wukong whined, throwing the controller across the room.

“Aww, too hard for you?” Macaque teased, not even cracking open an eye.

“Pfft, n-no!” Wukong floundered, taking off the headset and putting it on the floor. “I'm just going to take a break.”

“Sure you are,” Macaque snorted, opening his eyes a sliver.

Wukong stared, stock still, not sure if Macaque had realised that the glamour over his eye was down.

The scar over that side of his face was still hidden, but mismatching gold and milk coloured eyes fixed a tired gaze on him.

“Staring is rude,” Macaque murmured.

Wukong blinked, looking away. “Yeah, sorry.”

Macaque sat up, stretching with a yawn, hoodie riding up his sides slightly and exposing the yellow shirt he had on underneath.

It was surprisingly nice to see Macaque in bright colours.

Wukong reached out a hand to skim over the dark fur that stuck up on one side of his head, smiling softly when Macaque didn't flinch away.

“Hey, are your ears okay?” Wukong suddenly asked.

Macaque turned to face him, eyes back to their glamoured gold again. “Huh?”

“Well we were at a pretty busy place for most of today so I was wondering whether it was hard on your ears.”

Macaque seemed to blush. “Oh, no, they're all okay.”

The king's hand dropped to skim closer to where another two pairs of ears had to be hidden on the warrior. “Can I see them again?”

Macaque's eyes went wide and Wukong quickly withdrew his hand. “I'm sorry, you don't have to-”

The glamours dropped.

Wukong couldn't help but stare at the hues of colour on Macaque's ears, having nearly forgotten them over the centuries.

But there they were again, still with such resplendent glory.

Moonlight shone through the window, catching the back of Macaque's face with rays of light that made him shine.

“Rude to stare,” Macaque repeated, seeming to curl in on himself slightly.

“You're beautiful,” Wukong murmured, trying to ingrain this in his memory.

Maybe then he would have something to keep when they eventually fought again.

And just like that the glamours were back up, hiding Macaque's appearance behind a facade.

“I- I should go,” Macaque stammered, standing up and conjuring a portal in the floor.

“No, Mac, wait, I'm sorry-”

Too late.

His warrior was gone again, leaving him alone again.

Wukong sighed and dropped his head against the back of the sofa. “Idiot.”

[inklessletter]

No, but hear me out; Steve is genuinely good with kids and toddlers. Like, absurdly good. He engages with them because he finds them not only adorable, but really fun to be around. Steve kind of gets how they think, loves to play with them, their funny logic, how seriously they take what’s happening in their busy little minds. He finds them fascinating, and they often surprise him in the best ways. Steve respects them, and kids perceive that and love and respect him back. Also, to Steve, spending time with kids is socially freeing. When he’s around kids he’s not worrying about social cues, or saying something wrong, or can stop paying attention to his manners or his looks.

Steve loves kids, and kids love him back. 

And Holly Wheeler is the living proof of that.

Read it on Ao3

There is a bonus scene of this, just saying

—

You drew stars (around my scars)

Mike was the only one in the family who actively resisted to like Steve. Since he set foot in the Wheelers household, everyone in the family seemed to be head over heels for him. He had heard his father admitting more than once that Steve was a fine good young man; his mom was delighted with him since the very first dinner because he helped with the cleaning up after every time (he even brought flowers every now and then, ugh); and of course, he had to endure Nancy’s annoying pining and giggling for months. Then they started dating and he was at home almost every day and it was insufferable having him around every goddamn day. 

But the worst one was Holly.

Before Steve, Holly used to chase Mike around, wanting to be with him all the time. Of course, Mike shoved her out almost every time, especially when his friends were over. Lucas understood him; he knew what having an annoying little sister was like. Sometimes she was around, when they were drawing their D&D characters, Will would save a seat for her and let her borrow his big box of colors, or Dustin gave her treats under the table.

Mike Wheeler didn’t want to deal with Holly after him all the time, but when Steve showed up, Holly got totally smitten with him. He wouldn’t pressure her to give him a kiss, but instead, he high fived her. Steve called Holly “Super Star”.

“Hey, what’s up, Super Star? How was school today? Did Timmy borrow your doll? Again?”

“Hey Super Star, wanna sit next to me for dinner? I bet I can beat you, I’ll eat my baby carrots faster than you!”

“I heard Super Star was feeling funny in the tummy today. Are you okay? Will you feel better if we make a tea party with your stuffed buddies? Yeah?”

Then, suddenly Super Star didn’t want to do anything with Mike anymore. Now it was all Steve. 

(Sure, Mike didn’t like having her around, but he didn’t want Steve to steal her from him either. That’s two out of two, not that long ago, Nancy actually DMed campaigns for him and his friends, and then she decided she liked him and now it was suddenly a dumb game.)

When Nancy dumped his stupid ass in November of 1985 Mike almost made a happy dance. The nightmare was over.

But the fucker appeared at the door the day before Christmas with a gift for Holly. He didn’t stay for dinner, but he handed it to Karen. 

It was a stupid light board.

Dustin was suddenly attached to him now. Now they were friends. Lucas was also fond of him. Steve was cool now for his friends too, apparently. And don’t get him wrong, what he did to defend them was amazing. He hated to admit that it was a little bit cool (but Steve’s panicked face when he woke up in the back of Billy’s car driven by Max was awesome). 

Yeah, after all that shit they talked a little bit. Mike made himself crystal clear that he still didn’t like him, and Steve just sighed and told him that he knew. Mike was about to go victorious after that, but Stupid Steve had to add “anyhow, if you need anything, you can always reach me.”

He still kept showing up for Holly’s birthdays. He still brought her Christmas presents secretly. Mike knew that Steve showed up considerably early when he was going to pick him up and his friends to give them a ride to the arcade, or to the mall, or wherever just to spend half an hour playing with Holly. 

Holly laughed the loudest whenever they were playing in the living room together. And it’s not that Mike wasn’t glad that his sister was happy, it was just— He couldn’t be so flawless. Nancy called him bullshit, she must have seen something in him. No one was that perfect.

He was still around for the upcoming apocalypses. He was starting to make peace with the fact that Steve wasn’t going anywhere, when he stole yet another friend from Mike.

Now he and Eddie had bonded. 

They were often together and that riled Mike up like no other. Hawkins was full of people, did Steve have to put a goddamn spell on anyone around him?

Even when Mike hosted in his basement the Hellfire campaigns after Eddie graduated, Eddie showed up at his front door with Steve.

“You are not a Hellfire member, Steve,” Mike deadpanned.

As an answer, Steve lifted a box. A brand new toy doctor kit. He smiled.

“I didn’t come to see you anyway. Isn’t Holly’s birthday this weekend? I have an early gift for her.”

“You’re so lame.”

“Get new material, Wheeler,” Steve rolled his eyes.

Eddie observed the interaction, both of them coming in. Mike closed the door.

“Well, I mean, I’m not surprised you want to spend so much time with Holly, I guess you need someone of your intellect so you can stop feeling stupid all the time around adults.”

Steve stopped for a second. He looked at him as if he wanted to actually reply. He let out a sigh, and went upstairs. God, Mike resisted the urge to fully smile. He glanced at Eddie, who was giving him a dead serious, borderline angry look.

Mike rolled his eyes.

“Wheeler, while I do appreciate that you’re hosting the new campaign, I’m gonna say something, and I’m gonna say this just once, so listen carefully. Treat him like this once more, and you’re out of Hellfire.”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“That’s bullshit!” 

“No, you being an asshole with him is. I already lectured Dustin for this, and now I’m lecturing you. I will not tolerate any Hellfire member to behave like this towards friends. That, that is bullshit.”

“He’s not my friend.”

“Like hell he’s not. He cares for you, he does shit for you and you not only do not thank him, you pay him by treating him like shit. He’s saved your ass several times. He pays your fucking late dues, man. Like, shit, give back the tapes on time, Christ.”

Mike was fully uncomfortable now. He crossed his arms and bit his tongue to not snap at Eddie any more.

“Look,” Eddie said, calming his tone. “I don’t know if anything happened between you two, and I don’t want to know, but he’s going through a lot lately. A lot, Mike. You don’t—Shit, you don’t have to like him. Just—just don’t treat him like this, okay? I’m serious about cutting you off Hellfire if you keep this shit.”

Eddie headed down the basement, and Mike was left uneasy.

That afternoon was by far his worst performance in D&D. He had been replaying the conversation with Eddie in his head on and off all the time, but Eddie didn’t give him shit for it, because he knew.

Eddie, an understanding DM as he was, called on a break, and Mike bolted upstairs.

He headed to Holly’s bedroom, the door wasn’t closed all the way. He stopped before coming in to put his thoughts in order and apologize properly. He heard the voices behind the door.

“Doctor Super Star, there are no more patients for you to save! You did great! You cured them all!” Steve said in a funny voice.

“But your tummy hurts!”

“My tummy hurts? Oh, no, ugh! It hurts so bad!”

Mike peeped, still hidden, observing the scene. He saw Steve doing a pretty poor performance of a faint, and he fell, belly up over the rug, amongst the plush toys scattered around. Holly, dressed as a doctor, rounded him and kneeled at his side. 

“I’m going to give you an injection to save you!”

“Oh, please, Doctor Super Star, please, it hurts so bad! N-no, Holly, holly don’t lift my—”

Holly did, and Mike froze. 

Both Wheelers looked at the sudden exposed skin of Steve, all covered in nasty, pink scars. Eddie’s words resonated in the back of his mind loud and clear, and he suddenly understood what Steve was going through lately. Those scars were—God, they were gruesome. That must have hurt like shit. He heard what happened, but now he was seeing it.

That could have been his sister.

Or Robin.

That could have been anyone there, but it was Steve.

Mike gulped, feeling a heavy weight in the pit of his stomach. 

“It’s okay, Holly,” Steve spoke softly, but Mike could feel the nervous, vulnerable tone after his words.

Holly passed a finger ever so slightly, over one of the scars. She looked both curious and serious. Steve’s abdomen flinched a bit.

“Does it hurt?” Holly asked, softly.

Steve closed his eyes and put on a flaky smile, facing the ceiling.

“Yeah,” Steve whispered. “Yeah they—they hurt sometimes.”

Steve let her wander her small hand, examining his torso. 

“They’re pretty.”

A silence. A broken voice. “They’re not.”

“Yes, they are. They look like stars.”

Then, Holly, slowly, put against his stomach a bright pink toy syringe and faked an injection.

“Now you’re cured. Now it doesn’t hurt.”

Mike couldn’t see Steve’s whole face, but he saw enough before he turned away from Holly to see. His expression crumpled, and he saw Steve’s bob apple up and down a couple times. If he wasn’t crying, he was about to.

“You cured me, Doctor Super Star. Good job!”

“Wait! I’m not finished!”

Holly jolted to his drawer, where he kept all her drawing stuff. She came back with a few colored sharpies, and got back to the same position she was before. Steve observed her. 

Then Holly put the sharpie nib softly against Steve’s belly, and he observed.

She drew stars over Steve’s scars.

“See? They are pretty. They’re stars.”

Steve smiled at her. She beamed.

“They are stars. They are pretty.”

After a few seconds, Steve cleared his throat and suggested Holly tidy up all around and draw for a little bit in the living room. Only then Mike reacted, and left the hallway, going back down to the basement.

By the look he gave Mike when he came back, Eddie must have noticed something weird in Mike, but didn’t say anything.

When it was time for all of them to leave (seriously, Mike had been a total disaster), Eddie hushed them all to the van. Steve was saying his goodbyes, and then Mike spoke before he left.

“Hey, Steve.”

He turned around. “Yeah?”

There was a silence, in which Mike tried to find the words. Steve waited.

“I never—I will give the tapes back on time from now on. I’m sorry for that.”

Steve was puzzled. 

“Okay?”

Mike was shit apologizing. Mike was shit communicating, at best. He was shit at being vulnerable. Mike was shit at feelings.

“Yeah, and—thank you for—you know. The, um—yeah.”

Mike pursed his lips, crossed his arms. He pinned his eyes to the floor. He could feel his ears and his cheeks grow hotter and pinker.

“Yeah. No problem.”

He could feel Steve’s soft smile in his voice.

“You can go now.”

“Yeah, okay. Bye, Mike,” he said. “Good night Doctor Super Star!” 

Holly waved him from Karen’s arms. She even threw him a kiss. He captured it in the air and put it in his pocket.

Mike rolled his eyes.

Ugh.

[zeephyre]

CR3 EPISODE 77 SPOILERS HOLY FUCK

ASHTON GREYMOORE YOU DUMB FUCKING MANIAC IM GONNA KILL YOU DEAD

im literally in awe. i just ??? taliesin you are literally insane, don't ever do that shit again, but also PLEASE do that again, that was so fucking cool and terrifying and i loved and hated every second of it.

i love ashton greymoore. they're so stupid. so... monumentally blind sided by their own incapability to understand that their body, as broken as it's been, isn't smth that he should just toss to the side so they can be more useful. so they can "save everyone"

the second ashton was back with the group and started his super hero spiel i knew... i knew it was going to lead to martyrdom. i think this whole fuckin group is just a bunch of martyrs waiting for a chance to blow themselves up or toss themself onto the blade in the name of protecting "everyone else".

it was obvious that ashton taking in the shard had like a 99.999999% chance of going tits up and imploding on everyone involved, but jesus fucking christ, of COURSE ashton preserved. this was all thanks to fearne, fcg and taliesin's complete luck when rolling constitution holy FUCK

im not gonna say anything abt taliesin or ashton being selfish tho i see a lot of critters in the stream itself and on twitter doing that, bc taliesin never made it a "ashton wants the shard and doesn't want fearne to have it" situation. FEARNE DOESN'T WANT IT. AND ASHTON WOULD NEVER RISK HER. THEY WOULD RISK THEMSELF THOUGH.

it would have been cool to see fearne making the choice to take the shard, because they reeeeeeally hesitated for so long so honestly i don't think i can pretend this is just ashton.

all in all, this was so stupid and so dangerous and it should not have worked, and i... i cannot wait to see what ashton becomes.

(and i can't wait for them to get an ass whooping from the entirety of bells hells like cmon dude save the suicidal bullshit till we GET to the moon PLEASE)

callowmoore is real, but i honestly... While im very giggly about that i also know that THIS event is gonna have intruiging repercussions for fearne's perception of ashton and their relationship.

they literally kissed??? let's talk about that when i have processed the fact that ashton exploded into millions of little pieces and got put back together by luck. oh the irony.

jfc is it Thursday yet????

[underworld-park-offical]

PIP: Yes and I'll get the uhm

PIP: I'll get the uh

PIP: I’ll get

PIP: …

PIP: Lemme get ahhhh

PIP: Boneless Pizza 

PIP: And uh

PIP: Two liter of uh

PIP: Coke

HEIDI: …

HEIDI: The fuck kinda pizza?

HEDI: And the two liter machine broke, we got one liter tho

PIP: The fuck you mean B?

PIP: Alright look, 

PIP: Let me get that pizza BONELESS

HEIDI: Uh? Pizza don't got bone in it

PIP: Tf did I just say then

HEIDI: U said "Lemme get it BONELESS " like pizza got a damn bone in it

PIP: Y'all got BONES in ya shit then

HEIDI: Nah

PIP: So what's the problem?

HEIDI: DICK HEAD name one pizza that got bone on it

PIP: Just don't put them shits in my pizza bruh how many times I gotta say it

HEIDI: Bruh jus explain to me how tf pizza can be boneless?

PIP: If it don't got bone in it iss boneless

HEIDI: Son, what school u go to

PIP: dawg I don't understand the problem just make my shit BONELESS  DEADASS

HEIDI: I'm deadass not making this pizza…

PIP: Fine, then you deadass  better get me exactly what I want

PIP: Why are you so…

PIP: frumpy?

HEIDI: Excuse me?

PIP: You heard me

PIP: You won't even get me a boneless pizza 

PIP: How do you think that makes you look?

HEIDI: erm.

PIP: FRUMPY

HEIDI: You wanna play that way, huh?

HEIDI: Number 1, F = (m)(a) = (1000 kg)( 3 m/s²) =

3000 N.

PIP: What.

HEIDI: HMMMM a = F/a = 200 N / 2.5 m/s² = 80kg

PIP: Is there a manager I can speak to?

HEIDI: OHHH, YOU WANT THE ANSWERS  TO THE CROSSWORD ???

HEIDI: Ahem

HEIDI: One is centripetal, two is negative acceleration, three is plate tectonics, four is relative motion, five is slope—

PIP: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

HEIDI: SIX IS SPEED, SEVEN IS AVERAGE SPEED

PIP: WHAT'S EVEN THE GODDAMN DIFFERENCE?!

HEIDI: OH, I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED!

HEIDI: AHEM

HEIDI: THE MITOCHONDRIA IS THE POWERHOUSE OF THE CELL PIP: CAN I JUST GET PIP: MY GODDAMN PIP: FOOD PLEASE

TWEEK: WHAT HAPPENED TO BEING NICE??? PIP: I AM BEING NICE!!

TWEEK: BY YELLING??? PIP: FUCK YOU RESPECTFULLY

HEIDI: OKAY FINE, I'LL GET YOU YOUR GODDAMN BONELESS PIZZA OR WHATEVER DUMB QUEER SHIT YOU ORDERED

HEIDI: What do you want you low budget Super Sonic?

TWEEK: Uh yeah uh

TWEEK: What's this thing?

HEIDI: Do you have are stupid?

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: What?

HEIDI: Do you.

HEIDI: Have are.

HEIDI: Stupid?

HEIDI: Bitch?

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: What

TWEEK: What nonsense are you speaking?

TWEEK: What

HEIDI: That is a MENU

HEIDI: Say it with me

HEIDI: MEN

HEIDI: U!

TWEEK: Oh! A Meenew!

TWEEK: Cool!

PIP: Ignore him, he’s an imbecile

TWEEK: Hey! I'm not…

PIP: Anyways, he’ll have a pudding

HEIDI: We don't serve pudding here

TWEEK: No… no pudding???

HEIDI: No sir, we don’t have pudding

TWEEK: ( starts to cry like a lil bitch )

HEIDI: …

HEIDI: We have jello?

TWEEK: IT'S NOT THE SAME!! WAHHHHH!!!

PIP: He’ll just take a coffee

TWEEK: I DON'T WANT COFFEE!! I WANT PUDDIN!!

PIP: Shut

PIP: The

PIP: FUCK UP!

PIP: (SLAP )

TWEEK: ( Ugly Crying )

HEIDI: O….

HEIDI: Kkkkkkayyyyy…

HEIDI: What does the walking fetus want?

PIP: The what?

HEIDI: The child

HEIDI: What can we get for your child?

TWEEK: Right! My

TWEEK: My child

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: Her names Silly String

HEIDI: Cool

HEIDI: Cool cool cool

HEIDI: What does… HEIDI: Silly String

HEIDI: Want to eat

TWEEK: Uh…

TWEEK: What do kids eat?

TWEEK: Do  kids even eat?

HEIDI: Yes, kids eat, captain obvious

PIP: Tweek she’s eating a crayon

TWEEK: Oh

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: Do kids eat crayons?

PIP: No

PIP: No they do not

HEIDI: Does

HEIDI: Does Silly String

HEIDI: Want the jello instead?

TWEEK: No

TWEEK: I'm not feeding her that garbage

PIP: Can we just get a round of tater tots?

PIP: Please

HEIDI: Sure

HEIDI: Whatever gets me to stop talking to you 

HEIDI: And whatever gets me paid 

PIP: Well! That went over nicely!

TWEEK: You slapped me

PIP: It's a start

TWEEK: No

TWEEK: It's really not 

PIP: I'm recovering

PIP: I'm changing

PIP: I'm metamorphosing

PIP: I'm evolving

TWEEK: …

TWEEK: Whatever

TWEEK: You seeing this shit, Silly String? 

SILLY STRING: ( Grunt of disapproval  )

PIP: What, so you’re getting your child to hate me too?

TWEEK: You  hate us

PIP: I mean

PIP: True

PIP: But I'm changing

TWEEK: Liar

PIP: Okay I'm lying

PIP: But Estella put me in a fucking time out

PIP: So I have to act  nice

PIP: Even though I really

PIP: REEEEALLY

PIP: Don’t want to be

SILLY STRING: ( confused grunt )

TWEEK: Estella's your grandma, Silly String 

SILLY STRING: ( surprised grunt )

PIP: Ugh

PIP: I hate Mum…

TWEEK: You see her as a mom too?

PIP: I

PIP: Uh

PIP: NO PIP: I NEVER SAID THAT

PIP: She's just so overprotective of us all the damn time

PIP: IT'S ANNOYING

TWEEK: SHhh

TWEEK: Don't shout!

TWEEK: There's people behind us…

TWEEK: Why the fuck are they looking at us like that?

PIP: It's the queer stare

PIP: They're harshly judging you

TWEEK: Oh god…

TWEEK: Heyyyyy

TWEEK: Silly String, say hi

SILLY STRING: ( excited grunting  )

TWEEK: You all look

TWEEK: SO  cool

TWEEK: Did you come from the Pride Parade?

TWEEK: Er- I mean…

TWEEK: Uh…

TWEEK: This is my son

TWEEK: …Daughter?

TWEEK: Child?

TWEEK: I don't know what Silly String is…

PIP: Didn’t you call her, “her ” earlier?

TWEEK: I mean,

TWEEK: YEAH

TWEEK: That doesn't mean I know

TWEEK: Wait

TWEEK: What are  you, Silly String?

SILLY STRING: ( I don't know grunt )

PIP: It's a mystery!

PIP: How are you all this lovely evening?

PIP: Just SWELL I presume?

TWEEK: Pip your eye is twitching

PIP: IT'S HAPPY SEIZING!!!

TWEEK: No… no pretty sure it's twitching

PIP: HAPPY. SEIZING. I'M SO JOYFUL I'M EXPRESSING IT THROUGH MY EYE!

TWEEK: …Sure…

(Edits made by @pissblanket and @zemoleinyourtrashcan)

[audinosaur]

seijoh road trip ¡!

(bc i’m on a super long car ride right now)

let’s start with seating arrangements (assume they’re in an suv or something bc those maniacs would not be able to fit in anything small) 

iwaizumi’s driving (i don’t think this needs an explanation) 

matsukawa’s in the passengers seat. always. he’s the oldest sibling so therefore the front seat is his god-given right, sitting in the back is just too foreign for him

(he’d also put together a pretty nice playlist for the trip let’s be honest) 

kindaichi’s also usually a front seater (when he drives w his family), but with anyone else he prefers the very back row. it’s nice and secluded :)

plus he always sits next to kunimi, and kunimi needs the seclusion

speaking of needs, yahaba gets car sick ridiculously easy, so he needs to be next to a window so he can have easy vomiting access

like actually, the slightest bump or turn will make him throw up. 

watari’s right there next to him (he’s the only one sane enough & versatile enough to handle being in the very center of everything)

oikawa’s sitting behind iwaizumi, partially to be a helpful navigator and partially to annoy the fuck outta him

makki’s in the third row. i don’t have much to say about this, he’s just chill. you could put him on the hood of the car and he’d be all “this is cool man”

kyoutani’s in the trunk lol

he’s a trunk guy?? he’d sit back there with his dog and enjoy being away from everyone (plus he kinda hates the feel of seatbelts, they’re too constrictive)

(“that’s kind of the fucking point kyou”)

(“you are literally turning green go puke your guts out yahaba”)

hanamaki is the king of snacks. chips? he’s got em. chocolates? he’s got em. cookies? he’s got em. that boys bag is the equivalent to mary poppins’, the snacks just keep coming

funnily enough he can never remember to bring a phone charger

(chargers are kunimi’s department) 

kunimi’s blasting music/white noise/anything into his earbuds the entire ride. he NEEDS his shit to be charged because he’s not about to listen to people talking (read: arguing) for hours on end

kindaichi’s always the one who had to go to the bathroom immediately after they leave the rest stop

“why didn’t you go back there??”

“I DIDN’T HAVE TO GO THEN-”  

when everyone falls asleep iwaizumi likes to listen to true crime podcasts

the only thing is, watari is physically incapable of falling asleep in cars (i am projecting) so he just has to listen in horror as a narrator describes the most gruesome, bloody murders he’s ever heard

they accidentally left kindaichi behind once at a gas station (it was only for 5 minutes, but he sobbed uncontrollably)

after that they made sure to do a head count at every stop

every half hour oikawa will get bored and make them all play games like i spy, 20 questions, truth or dare (mostly truths), etc. 

cue kyouhaba crawling over the seats to beat the shit out of each other during punch buggy

kunimi’s splayed over kindaichi for half of the trip

so hanamaki will be having a conversation with kindaichi and trying so hard to ignore the fact that kunimi’s head is in his lap and the former is combing his fingers through the latters hair 

oikawa switches out to drive so that iwaizumi can sleep for a bit, but ends up screaming at some dumb crap another car did and is banned from the wheel (road rage oikawa supremacy!)

kyoutani’s the “are we there yet?” person. every ten minutes he’ll ask how much longer until they stop

when they do stop, he’ll just go run a lap or two. then come back ten times happier than before, he just needs to stretch his legs !!

mattsun will look up fun facts about each place they visit to entertain everyone :) he’ll be very “dad”-ish about it, like “woaahh, listen to this kids” and “jeez louise that’s a cool little nugget of information”

(we need more dorky matsukawa he’s a total fucking nerd sometimes)

he likes to recline his seat all the way back just to piss yahaba off (he moves it back upright but only after making the second year say please)

yahaba practically falls to the ground when they pull over at rest stops. everyone will go get food/water and pee and he’ll still be kneeling on the pavement holding his stomach when they get back

(when i said the guy gets car sick i MEANT CAR SICK)

in between podcast episodes, iwaizumi will look back at all his sleeping teammates (and a mortified watari) and just think about how much he loves his friends :)) 

[lowkeyrobin]

helloo could you do mcyt's (preferably tommy, tubbo, freddie, and max but you can add whoever else!!) having to take care of the reader because they got their wisdom teeth out and their all delusional and out of it from the drugs 😭😭 have a good day!

omg YES OF CORURSE !!!! ; this sis so cute also sorry if this is like dumb cause I've never gotten wisdom teeth removed but I have gotten a cavity removed if that counts idk ; also it's 1am and I've been working on a double wattpad special project all day and I'm just like brainrotted LMFAOOOO ; anyways I'm super happy to get that like worked on and also do these reqs cause irs been like over a month atp I'm sorry

MCYT ; wisdom teeth removal

includes ; tommyinnit, ranboo, badlinu & maxggs

warnings ; language, substances (laughing gas), me not really knowing how this works ig

masterlist

TOMMYINNIT

absolutely cackling everytime you speak

"I wanna listen to gay music, tom" you whine

"what is gay music?!??!"

"CHAPPELL ROAN"

"WHY ARE WE YELLING"

offers to get you yogurt on the way home

"pretzel"

"i know the soft pretzel addiction is tough, but they're too hard for you right now"

"what the fuck, mate"

you proceed to only say mate for an hour cause it doesn't sound like a real word anymore

pain in the ass

good for content!

his first video to reach 1m views in months LMAOOOO

RANBOO

has to get the whole crew in to help you

like whole crew as in harry, molly, tommy, and jack

"stand up in 1, 2, 3-"

you crash immediately to the floor

"i don't think that's standing"

"i don't think so either, harry"

literally loads you up on milkshakes

feels so bad about how you're complaining about being uncomfortable but he can't do anything so... suffer ig

he's just nodding along to the dumb shit you say

very embarrassing to be on the public bus though

everyone's quietly giggling trying to not laugh up a storm as you mumble about harry and something about vapes

you might as well be on crack

FREDDIE BADLINU

literally like teaching an infant how to walk

baby gloves are on, asks the dental surgeon what he needs to do and writes it down

constant hugs cause you ask for them every 3 seconds

actually laughing like hell when you say something weird/dumb

just hands you your earbuds and let's you play music if it helps the woozyness at all

"listen to megan with meeeee"

"okay, well I need an earbud, pal"

"oh, yeah"

takes a picture of your swollen mouth while you're taking a nap on his shoulder on the bus

"I'm convinced this is what raising a toddler is like"

"I'm a cool toddler though, right? cause I'm awesome and cool and awesome, right?"

"yup"

MAXGGS

you actually confuse him for tubbo and it was over (he was streaming w tubbo for tubbothon)

"okay, bye. get home safe-"

"mAx-" voice cracks are insane what

was worried that they performed surgery on your vocal chords while they had you out

nah your jaw wasn't used to being so strained for so long

loads you up with milkshakes and ice cream

you're mostly only getting around on his back cause you're too woozy

like taking care of a drunk person

"i have to change the towel-"

"what towel?"

"the towel in your mouth, y/n"

"THERES A TOWEL IN MY MOUTH?'

he's literally never laughed so much in his life

made a joke about being pro getting high on laughing gas

"whatever makes you happy, gang"

[kozmicmizuu]

yall… a kimetsu academy au by kozu?!?!?? yes, and it’s silly…

————————————————————————

okay so it’s like completely normal ya know?? the main three getting bullied by their teachers and struggling with homework

but the school has a super cool and awesome secret— and that’s that the school has a youtube channel for some reason idk

the content isn’t really school related at all, it’s just— staff having fun and being silly(ex. The Boys and The Group Chat on youtube :3)because i feel like the students forget that their teachers are like— mostly in their early twenties.

it’s literally whiplash that zenitsu, tanjiro and inosuke got when they first found the youtube channel. they saw sanemi and obanai having FUN and SMILING and LAUGHING— shocking

also yes giyuu does actually smile canonically in kimetsu academy #thats adorable

back to the silly content, it consists of some reaction shit and irl silly hangouts and games they make

giyuu (unfortunately) is the mf that gets peer pressured into playing the horror games. he’s the only one that was willing (forced) to play. he’s really good at them but he is SKITTISH and gets scared easily— long story short he’s a pussy when it comes to games. tengen and kyojuro are the ones that join him the most

also uno is banned from being played in the school grounds, they got too violent and tengen had some explosives on hand

also here’s some silly lil scenarios mweheheh

————————————————————————

giyuu, playing “Silent Breath” trying not to say anything too loud: fuckfuckfuckfuck—

*gets jumpscared like the idiot he is.*

giyuu: FUCK YOU- YOU DUMB BITCH—

the other teachers in the next room, hearing the screams of fear and anger:

tengen: damn, that’s the fourth scream today

-

rengoku: you guys!! wanna play uno??

obanai: i thought we weren’t allowed to play that?

everyone looking at giyuu, who is the one who enforces rules:

giyuu: what- oh.. technically we can’t play the card game…

everyone: :(

giyuu: but… no one said anything about the online version

tengen: LETS GOOO

-

kanae: how about a more relaxed video for this week?

gyomei: i agree with the idea of a more peaceful video

sanemi: that’s so boring to- lets do something insane— like going to haunted place!

tengen: hell yeah!! let’s do that!!

giyuu: 🙁

kyojuro: it’s going to be okay giyuu!! i’m sure you’ll be fine!

he did not end being fine btw, being a medium makes his life hell

————————————————————————