#let's go steal a reboot

[lacedinweb22]

daddy's coworker (Miguel O'Hara x reader)

Requested by @thbidkbutok

nsfw 18+

summary: Your father leaves you alone at home with his coworker, Miguel O'Hara, who you've known for years. As he works in your father's office finishing up business, you are tempted to distract him.

warnings: aggressive sex, daddy kink, choking, clawing, unprotected sex (penetration)

ʚ ｡⋆˚ ୨୧ ˚⋆｡ ɞ

He stood tall, his dark brown eyes looking down at me, standing right beside my father. “Y/N, you remember Mr. O’Hara. He’s been working with me at Alchemax for…Jesus how long, Miguel?” my father asked, looking up at Miguel. He combed his fingers through his wavy hair, his eyebrows furrowed in thought. “I want to say… six years soon,” he replied, looking down at me, his hand out for me to shake. 

His massive hand enveloped my hand, which he shook firmly while maintaining eye contact. “Of course, always nice to see you, Mr. O’Hara,” I replied softly, slowly beginning to blush.

“Please, call me Miguel,” he replied quickly, nodding down to me. 

“Man, just yesterday he was a fresh youngin intern, now he’s made it to the big leagues,” he nudged Miguel, who broke a small smile, “I told him he could use my office for the night since Alchemax’s systems will be down and rebooting for the rest of the night. He has some important algorithms to work on. Your mother and I, however, will be out for the night, unless you care to join?” he asked, looking at me hopefully. “Sorry Dad, I told you I have that stupid pre-lab I really need to work on, but this weekend, I swear I’ll be free,” I assured him, giving him a side hug as he began to back away to leave. “Of course, my love. We’ll be home soon. I trust you’ll be warm and welcoming to Mr. O’Hara, hm?” “Of course, Pa, have fun,” I replied, smiling at both of them as they looked down at me.

I backed away to the kitchen, and began to prepare something to snack on, as my father and Miguel conversed and said their farewells. 

I cut up some fruit, stealing glances and watching them interact. Miguel’s voice was deep and echoing, and his rarely seen smile was contagious. I smiled, subconsciously when he would let out a low chuckle at my dad’s embarrassing jokes.

I’d always seen him at Alchemax dinner parties and gatherings throughout the years. He was always chased after at these events, but was famously known as the stubborn, secretive, and  genius bachelor who could never give anyone the time of day. I remembered watching him converse with the adults, his dry humor going over all of their heads, as I giggled from a distance.  

I remembered when I was fresh in college and he was a fresh intern. I clearly remember the first time we met at my dad’s office. We were so different then. So much has changed. He’s still so handsome, perhaps even more. 

He stole glances at me as they spoke. My cheeks burned, as I quickly looked down at the fruit, slowly nibbling at the mango wedges, avoiding eye contact.

Eventually the front door shut, and Miguel walked to my father’s office. He wore a black form fitting sweatshirt, with dark gray dress pants. He walked so confidently, his glasses hanging on his collar, dangling against his muscular chest. His eyes caught mine staring, as he smirked then nodded to me. He turned forward and entered the office, leaving the door open.

I waited a minute then peeked around the kitchen corner, looking through the glass windows to spy on him. He now wore his glasses, eyebrows scrunched as he slid his fingertips across the hologram screens. 

I looked down at the variety of fruit laid out, then got an idea. 

“Mr. O’Hara— I mean Miguel, would you like a bowl of fruit?” I asked, leaning against the doorframe holding up the bowl. He turned from the hologram, his face lit up by the orange light. 

“Mmm, that does sound good. Please and thank you, Y/N,” he replied, softly. I walked up to the desk, sliding the bowl slowly in front of him. 

“So, what are you up to these days?” I said, popping a grape into my mouth. “Work, lots of work,” he replied, snapping a piece of apple then biting into it.

“And you? Man, the last time I saw you, a few months ago, I helped you—” “You helped me with that insane final project I was working on,” I finished.

“Yes, how’s school treating you?” “Fine, but I don’t really want to talk about that right now, I mean— not to be rude, but… just curious, what’s the dating scene like for you? As an older man I mean,” “older man, huh? I didn’t know I was considered ‘older’ but I guess to you college kids, your late thirties might as well be your death bed,” he scoffed, biting into a half of an apple. I shrugged, waiting for a real response.

“I don’t date. I'm single. I figured you knew this; the entirety of Alchemax won’t shut up about it, but yes, I’m single. I’ve got Gabriella and you know… I’m a busy man,” he answered, his eyes glued to mine.

“Single, wow, how convenient,” I muttered, stealing a grape from his bowl. 

I walked around the desk, coming to his side, looking at the bright screens. I leaned forward on my tiptoes, my hips pushed out in front of him. His eyes remained on me as my eyes explored his scribbles and notes covering the equations and numbers spread across the screen. I looked back at him, he looked up at me from his chair, his eyes darkened. I looked down at the huge bulge in his pants. I scoffed.

“Anyways, sorry to distract you, I have a pre-lab to work on, so I must be going. See you later, Mr. O’Hara. Let me know if you… need anything.” I left the office swiftly and went back to the kitchen to clean up. 

I washed the cutting board, as I suddenly felt his hot breath against my neck. “Someone got the message,” I breathed out, as his hard-on pressed against the back of my thigh through his pants. I turned around, my back against the sink, as his hips pressed up against me. 

He lowered his glasses, looking down at me, then slowly took them off, putting them down on the counter beside us. He towered over me, stroking my cheek, putting his thumb on my chin. He traced my lips gently, smirking as he pressed his member against my inner thighs. 

“Did you think I didn’t notice you staring at me all these years?” he whispered, leaning down to kiss me. “I just didn’t know… you felt the same… tension I felt, Mr. O’Hara,” I breathed out in between his wet kisses. His lips were soft and warm, his sharp teeth, almost like fangs, brushed my lips. “What— your teeth, how—” “Don’t worry about it,” he breathed out against my lips. I pulled away to look up at him, he looked back down at me, then dug his face into my neck, wrapping his teeth around me. “Miguel,” I moaned, as he began to dig his fangs into my skin. “I told you not to worry about it,” he breathed out, as he dug his claws into my thighs. I had a slight idea as to why he was built like a fucking beast, but it wasn’t my main focus. 

He drew his lips back up to my lips, still pinning my waist with his claws, tightly against the counter. He began to slide his fingers down my shorts, slowly pushing them down. He bit my bottom lip then slid his hand down the front of my underwear, playing with my clit. "What a wet, pretty distraction," he groaned into my lips. I moaned out from both pleasure and the excitement from finally getting what I had wanted for years. 

My shorts were now at my ankles, as I stood pressed against him in just my soaked underwear. He swiftly lifted me up, sitting me on the kitchen counter, as he kissed me hard, and pulled my shorts off from my ankles. He threw them to the floor, I grabbed him by his belt, pulling his hips in between my legs, his boner stabbing against my desperately aching heat. I unbuckled his belt and undid his zipper, then tugged his pants down, revealing his boxers and the massive tent his hard-on had built. 

“So hard for me, Mr. O’Hara,” I breathed out, palming his member. His hands rested on the counter on both sides of me, as he hovered over me, sucking on my neck. I continued playing with him, as he moaned my name, his fangs brushing my ear. He then grabbed my ass tightly, digging his claws into my hips, pulling me against his boner. I tugged at his sweatshirt, then helped him take it off as he too pulled my sweater off of me. I was now in just my bra and panties, and he was now shirtless and in boxers. I spread my fingers across his skin. He had scars spread across his figure, and his muscles bulged against his glowy skin. He lowered my bra, and wrapped his hands around my tits, squeezing and playing with them. He lowered his face to my chest and began to suck and bite on my nipples, humming against my skin. I combed my fingers through his waves, tugging at the roots as he moaned into my chest. He squeezed my hips tight, as he traced my chest with hickies.

He stood up straight and slid my underwear to the side, creating access to me, as I pulled his boxers down to reveal his dangerously long and thick member. I wrapped my hand around him, making myself familiar with his length. As I felt him, he dipped two fingers into me slowly, coating himself in my slick, then spreading it along his own length. 

He then guided himself against me, pressing up against my entrance. “Are you ready, princesa?” he asked, smirking, revealing his fangs. “Mhmmm,” I moaned, kissing him and pulling his hips against me. He slowly entered, just his tip stretching me out. I moaned out, wincing in pain. “Fuck, slowly,” I whimpered, gripping his back muscles. He dug his face into my neck, as he pushed up and into me slowly but entirely. He was now completely inside of me, causing my insides to stretch and burn. “Fuck, so tight Y/N,” he groaned into my ear. He gripped my hips with both hands, his claws digging into me as he thrusted in and out of me slowly, pulling me onto his length. He began to speed up, I whimpered and whined as I adjusted to the intense pain and pleasure his thick cock was creating. 

He kissed me, biting my bottom lip as he continued thrusting into me. He pulled the back of my hair tightly, “Such a good girl for me, sitting up there, your wet pretty pussy stretching out for me,” he growled. 

His long cock slammed into my cervix causing me to arch my back to prevent further pain, his dick was now angled hitting my g spot, rubbing against me rapidly, spreading warmth up into my stomach. “You’re going to make me… cum Mr. O’Hara,” I moaned, my lips pressed against his neck.

“What a good girl you’re being for me, mami, you like this?” he breathed out, keeping his rhythm. He wrapped his big hand around my neck, tightly choking me, as he had his other hand on my waist, pulling himself into me. He kissed my shoulder, fucking and choking me simultaneously. His aggressive thrusts caused a wet slapping noise, as his soaked cock continued pushing my slick back into me.

“So this is your idea of warm and welcoming, huh?” he growled, smirking down at my lips. “Do you do this with all of your father’s coworkers, huh? Or am I the lucky one?” he whispered into my ear, his fangs brushing my skin. “You’re the only one, Mr. O’Hara… mmmm fuck, I’m gonna… cum, Miguel,” I whined out, gripping his hand on my neck, and arching my back. “Miguel, fuck,” I whimpered, breathing out as I throbbed around him. He slowed down, releasing my neck, letting me recover from my intense climax.

“I’m not done with you,” he growled, as he lifted me off of the counter then turned me around, and bent me over. He slid my underwear to the side, then pressed his cock against my entrance, slowly entering just his wet tip. He pressed himself in slowly, only warming the tip of his cock repeatedly, creating a wet noise every thrust. He wrapped his hands around my hips tightly, pulling himself into me.

“That man who was just here fifteen minutes ago, that’s your father, I’m your daddy,” he whispered, picking up the pace of just his tip thrusting in and out of me. “I mean, I’m sure as hell old enough to be your daddy,” he scoffed, continuing to tease me with his tip; I groaned into my arms, frustrated.

“You won’t get any more until you call me what I am,” he growled, performing only shallow thrusts. “You’re my– my daddy, Mr. O’Hara… fuck! Please, give it to me,” I whined, pushing my hips further out for more length. “Mmmm that’s better,” he groaned as he entered his entire length into me. We both breathed out heavily as he quickly began to pound into me, rhythmically rearranging my insides. “Mmmm daddy like that, keep going, keep fucking me like that,” I moaned out. “Mmmm ¿como eso mami? You like that, do I make you feel good?” he groaned, his body thrusting into mine, pushing my body into the cold marble counter. I moaned in response, whimpering at every hit. 

His claws dug into my hips, drawing blood that dripped down the side of my thighs. I whimpered in pain, but was too distracted by the pleasure of his length to care. 

“Cmon, Y/N, you can give me one more, I know you can,” he grunted, angling his hips lower, to directly hit up into my g spot. “Miguel, fuck… don’t stop, don’t fucking stop,” I whimpered, feeling my thighs tremble, and my slick drip down my inner thighs. 

“God, what would your father say if he saw you bent over the kitchen island for me, huh? Cumming for me?” he growled through his smirk. “He’d be… furious,” I breathed out. “Fucking furious, huh?” He scoffed. “You’re breaking the rules for me?” he asked, squeezing my thighs tighter. “Mhmmm,” I whimpered, feeling myself about to climax. “Mmmmm fuck, your tight little pussy is going to make me cum,” he breathed out, keeping his rhythm. “Keep going, keep going daddy, please,” I whined out as I began to finish. 

“Ughhhh mami, like that, mmm like that,” he whimpered into my ear, as he bent down, hovering over me, his large biceps surrounding me on each side. He filled me up with his hot white mess, continuing to thrust as we both rode out our highs, pushing his liquid back into me. “Ay Mami, fuck,” he moaned into my ear, his chest pressed against my back. His cum dripped out of me inevitably, as he lowered his hand in between my legs to spread and rub it all around my slit. The noises of our skin and fluids interacting echoed throughout the penthouse. He slowly thrusted then stopped and pulled out, his huge load leaking out of me immediately. I whimpered to myself, my face resting against my arms on the counter. 

His hands explored my back and ass, massaging me as he kissed the back of my shoulder. “Go get cleaned up, Y/N, rápido. Wouldn’t want your father finding out what you did with your new daddy, huh?”

[anonymouswh]

I fully believe that Duke has an elaborate scheme running in the manor at all times where he convinces his siblings that he has never gotten in trouble with Bruce once in his life, he is lying to their faces but Bruce is so bad at communication that he *dosent notice*

Dick: Hey Duke! Want to get icecream and catch up? It's been a while since I was in Gotham.

Duke (who is grounded for replacing all of the food in the house with icecream replicas): Sorry I can't, I'm benched :(

Dick: Oh! I hope your okay :)

Duke: Just a small incident with some ice, I'll be okay! Bruce is such a worrywort.

Dick brings Duke icecream as a get well soon present, Bruce fully believes his sons are teaming up to mock him.

Jason: Hey Duke could you give me a hand with some results on the batcomputer?

Duke (whoes banned from looking at cases for a week becuase he submitted a case report for his creative writing assignment on purpose): Oh can't sorry Jason, Bruce has recommended that I take a break from screens for my health :)

Jason:...he's such a mother hen.

Barbara: Duke...why does your tracking data show you our right now? Bruce told me you were taking a break to focus on school.

Duke (sneaking out for the 5th time that week, forgot to edit his tracking information): Oh no that's so weird, do you think it's a glitch? Will Bruce be mad at me! 🥺

Barbara: Don't worry probably a glitch, no need to tell him, I'll reboot the systems!

Cass:....

Duke.....

Cass:....

Duke: I won't tell them that it's you stealing their clothing if you keep you mouth shut.

Cass: I'm not a snitch

Tim: Hey Duke I know your grounded right now but can you help me fuck with Bruce real quick? I'll tell him that I forced you!

Duke: Fuck yeah let's go, also I'm *benched* not grounded

Tim 'I lie to Batman for fun' Drake: That's the sprit!

Damian: Thomas I require your assistance in the kitchen

Duke (banned from the kitchen as he set it on fire after doing a science experiment involving gasoline and chicken tenders): nooooo thank you, I burnt myself last time, I'm waiting for Alfred to teach me :(

Damian: Fine I'll wait for Todd

Stephanie (Grounded after paint bombing Bruce): Gosh how does Duke get away with everything? I swear Bruce is oblivious!

Duke (grounded...for also paint bombing Bruce): So strange! But I'm not testing his good will this week so no parties for me!

Whenever anyone askes Bruce he says Duke is benched not grounded becuase it's the same thing right?

[snowball-doie]

| pairing: Plus size!fem!Reader x Johnny

| warnings: 18+ MDNI. Loss of virginity. Romantic Johnny. Fingering. Johnny and reader tasting themselves. Protected vaginal sex (He's got stacks on stacks of condoms, let's be fr). Semi-awkward sex? A surprising amount of plot from me...

| wc: 6.3k

| aurora's note: this was originally written as a self insert!oc x idol!oc. please let me know if i missed changing any names, pronouns, or information.

When Johnny opened the front door to his apartment, you were hit with the warmth from the heaters in every room and the heated floors kicking into gear suddenly. The contrast between the cold outside of Seoul in winter and the warmth inside made his apartment even more inviting than it already was. You stepped in behind him. You had been to his apartment a million times over, there was nothing to be worried about. This was Johnny, after all. He would probably offer to watch a movie or two, then you would crash on the couch together, cuddled up in each other’s arms, you half off the couch because of how much of a rough sleeper you were.

“Would you like something more comfortable to wear?” He tossed his keys on the counter after you nodded shyly. “I have some pajamas you can wear, come on.” He held his hand out for you to take, then he led you to his bedroom where he pulled out fresh navy blue sweatpants, a grey t-shirt, and a pair of fuzzy socks. “I’ll change in the guest room.” After grabbing his own pajamas from the bed, he gave you a quick smile and a peck on the lips, and he left with the door closing behind him.

You stood there, baffled, staring at the door, wondering what would happen within the next few hours. You never changed in his apartment before— Never wore his clothes. It happened so quickly, you didn’t even realize that your feet had carried you from the front door all the way to his bedroom so easily… What if he had other intentions? It would have been so easy for him to coax you there all the same, and Johnny had a certain reputation surrounding him, despite your many months of dating, so who was to say you wouldn’t have fallen into some kind of plot just to get you into his bed?

No, come on. It was Johnny! He never would have done that to you in a million years.

You were embarrassed after putting his pajamas on. They didn’t fit the way they were supposed to, at least not in the way you imagined wearing a partner’s clothes… You thought that it would be loose fitting and so baggy that it would hide everything, because that was how you always saw girlfriends wearing their boyfriend’s clothes online and in movies. Instead, because Johnny was so much taller and skinnier, his sweatshirt fit you perfectly, almost a little too perfectly, and it made you feel self-conscious. You disliked that the waistband hugged your hips, or that there was no bagginess in the sleeves, and that he would be able to see everything from your boobs to your hips to the tummy you had… You wanted to cry. But it wasn’t like you could take it off and go back into the living room wearing a nice dress for the rest of the night. And you knew that he would have been disappointed if you didn’t wear his clothes. Fuck.

You tried to suck it up and go out there anyhow. They were just clothes, after all.

“I made some hot chocolate, I hope that’s alri—” Johnny stopped in his tracks when he looked up and saw you standing there. “I…” It looked like his brain went into Windows Reboot because of the way he was mindlessly gawking at you, like he couldn’t think straight for two seconds. “I, um, made some hot chocolate…” He gulped. “Figured it was… too late for coffee…” He slowly ventured around the kitchen island with both of the mugs in his hands. “You look pretty,” he finally let out just as he was standing in front of you and could steal another kiss.

You blushed against his lips. He was embarrassing you even more than wearing the clothes already did.

When you couldn’t find the strength to reciprocate or move, Johnny took the hint and went towards the couch so that he could set down the drinks and plop himself down comfortably on the cushions. “Can I convince you to watch Star Wars with me?”

You had to snap yourself back to reality with a deep breath and a blink of your eyes that made you glance over at his casualness. “Depends on which one,” you replied as you went to join him. “If it’s one of the sequels, I’ll leave.”

He laughed and pulled you down onto the couch with him. “I was thinking the fourth one.”

“Thin ice, but it’ll do.”

As Johnny turned on the TV and scrolled to find A New Hope, you got comfortable laying next to him, your back pressed against his chest, his chin resting on your shoulder so that he could see what he was doing on the TV. All the while it was painfully obvious to you how Johnny's feet were lazily playing with your ankles. Did he realize what he was doing? Did he know that you were very aware of the clothing you were wearing and how he was pressing his body into yours? Maybe he didn’t fully know it, but you did. It made you dizzy and excited, but you had to play it off coolly so that you didn’t look like an idiot around him.

When the movie started, Johnny put the remote to the side, then his hands went to your hips. You finally tensed up at the same time your breath hitched. Surely Johnny knew exactly what he was doing! You even imagined that he was grinning behind you as his fingers drew light circles on your hips, tickling your skin, forcing the hair on your arms and legs to stand up before a shiver ran down your spine, causing you to buck back into him slightly. Johnny sighed. He didn’t flinch or react too wildly… He just sighed contently behind you.

Luke met with the Jawas, and Johnny's hands wandered down to your thighs, a part of your body which you had a love-hate relationship with. On one hand, thick thighs were nice because they gave you bigger hips which you enjoyed, but you also hated the idea of how much fat there was on your legs and how it made you different from other women— The types of women Johnny used to get with before he fell head over heels for you. Having him knead your thighs made you unsure of what to do. Were you supposed to tell him that he was being distracting? Perhaps you could have shoved his hand away if you truly disliked it. Or, worse, you could have admitted to him that it was nice, that you wanted more, that his hands could have even gone between—

What the Hell were you thinking!

Ugh, it was all Johnny's fault. He was purposefully teasing you. All night, he’d been affectionate with you in the car and at his birthday dinner, and now that you were at his place where he could do anything he wanted, he was taking full advantage of it, and you couldn’t tell the difference between up and down whenever he touched you like that.

As Han flew the crew away from Tatooine, you couldn’t take it anymore. The movie was going too fast yet so slow, and it was like you were watching it for the first time or not at all… You just couldn’t think straight with the way Johnny was behaving. So you decided to distract yourself from your wandering thoughts caused by his curious hands, pushing yourself off the couch to get more to drink from the kitchen. You prayed as you picked up his mug that he didn’t notice your flustered face. Hopefully he didn’t see your anxiety stricken hands or wobbly knees either.

Johnny shuffled around somewhat on the couch behind you while you made drinks in the kitchen. You tried your best to ignore him, to not give him any inclination that all you could think about was him, but it was so hard when all there was to think about over the sound of the movie was how it sounded to hear him sigh in your ear when you moved.

Then it occurred to you. A wicked thought. Something slightly brilliant that Yuta would be proud of if you ever got the courage to tell him about it.

If Johnny wanted to play the teasing game because he thought it would be easy to get away with, then you would fight back, play the same game, meet him at eye level so that he didn’t get all the fun out of it. He would either lean into it, and what was the harm at that point when you were already committed to each other… Or he’d tell you off, at which point you would know for sure what the boundaries were and that he wasn’t actually fucking with you, he was just trying to get comfortable while spending time with you. Either way, it would give you some relief and peace of mind.

So you returned to the couch with full cups in hand, and you gave Johnny's mug to him before carefully sliding directly onto his lap with your thighs bracketing his, preventing him from seeing the movie— All there was to see was you, in his clothes. You both stared at each other while you hesitated. What were you supposed to do next? You hadn’t quite thought that far ahead. Shit.

Johnny took the initiative instead. His free hand began gently gliding up your thigh, inching its way towards the spot which craved him most. You tried so hard to play it smooth. You didn’t want to let him know exactly how much he had actually gotten to you, because that wouldn’t be fun, for it defeated the purpose of the game you wanted to play with him. So you swallowed your embarrassment before smoothly taking a drink while staring down at him. Johnny's breath fluttered.

“How was your birthday?” you finally asked him quietly.

His hand snaked higher towards the hem of your pants, finding the shoestring waistband that he could tug on to keep his mind occupied. “It was fine…”

“Did you have fun?”

He gulped and nodded vaguely.

“You sure?”

He nodded more confidently. Slowly, little by little, as if he was worried that one quick movement would scare you off completely, Johnny leaned in towards you while tilting his chin up for you as you leaned down and in just as slowly as him until… eventually… your lips touched. You elected to set your cup down on one of the tables beside you so that you could wrap your fingers in his hair, but Johnny was too distracted to go to all that trouble. He did his best to balance his drink in one hand while holding you close on his lap. You took pity on him. It wasn’t like you were stupid— You knew exactly what was happening and where things were leading to, so you put more of your weight down on his thighs, even though you were terrified to do so, and that prompted Johnny to put his cup next to yours.

“Tell me if I should sit up,” you whispered between kisses. “Or get off…”

But his hands drifted around to the small of your back so that you couldn’t let up at all. Suddenly, much to your surprise, Johnny grabbed your ass and held on while moving your hips forward and back, which made you feel his clothed erection pressing against your covered clit. You both moaned. He moved you faster, and you bit onto his bottom lip in an attempt to fight for some kind of dominance, however all that did was encourage Johnny to use his tongue in your mouth to reclaim the dominance he always won. You groaned and pulled at his hair.

“John,” you muttered between kisses, but he kept going so you had to push away in order to breathe. “I have to tell you something first…” You bit your lip nervously. “I…” Your gaze tore away from his due to the shame bubbling up in your chest. “I’ve never…” It was too fucking embarrassing to admit it. Shit. “I’ve never done…”

Suddenly, his thumb was tilting your chin so that you had to look at him again. “It’s okay.”

You pouted at him, relieved but also still ashamed.

“It is!” He chuckled, wiping your pout clean off your face ‘til you giggled, earning a grin from him. “But we’re not doing it on the couch if that’s the case.” He grabbed your hand from his hair. “Here…” He kissed your knuckles before slowly helping you off his lap so he could stand and take you along with him towards the bedroom. Cautiously, he closed the door so that you could be more private and intimate. “Is this okay?”

You nodded.

“You’re sure?”

“Yeah,” you croaked. “I’m just nervous, I’m sorry.”

Johnny led you towards the bed. “Don’t be sorry.” He kissed your cheeks gently. “Just… tell me if we should slow down or stop, yeah?”

“Yeah…”

He moved down to kiss your neck. “I’m not gonna rush. Okay?”

“Yeah…” you bit back a moan.

As he chuckled against your skin, he carefully helped you lay back onto the mattress. Despite your anxieties in the back of your head about what was going to proceed, Johnny's hold on you managed to calm you down just enough that you were able to participate by tangling your fingers in his hair once more as you spread your legs in order to make room for Johnny as he shimmied down. He thanked you by settling comfortably. Through his lashes, he looked up at you carefully while his cold hands snaked under your shirt, slowly pushing it up and up and up until it was over your bra and up to your chin. Johnny gulped slightly. His eyes were glued to the beautiful image of your lace bra holding your breasts, and you could see as his eyes glossed over that he was imagining what you'd look like sans the bra. The self-consciousness was settling in slightly. No one had ever looked at you like that. Not in the context similar to your current predicament. The angle he was at made it so that he could see how your stomach pressed against the waistband of the pajama pants he lent to you, and that was enough to make you want to cover yourself up— But the second your hands went to do so, Johnny grabbed your wrists to prevent you from hiding what he was admiring.

“You’re not going to scare me off,” he said reassuringly, like he could read your mind. “I know what I’ve signed up for.” Much to your surprise, Johnny kissed both sides of your waist before inching up to kiss your clavicle between your breasts. “You’re so fucking beautiful—” He barely got the words out before he couldn’t hold himself back anymore, jumping up to kiss you passionately. While you kissed, you continued to play with his hair, and Johnny's hands slid under you slowly with your help by shimmying around slightly so that he could unclasp your bra after a few seconds of struggling. At least he got it off. You thought that was a talent in itself since you were laying down and you were kissing so roughly. “Fuck…” As your bra disappeared from your chest, Johnny cupped one breast with his left hand.

You whimpered into his mouth. Johnny took that as his chance to stick his tongue further in, your own tongue immediately giving up all control to him so that he could do as he pleased.

Suddenly, just when you were getting used to the slickness of his tongue that was beginning to feel natural to you, Johnny pulled away and moved back down, his lips immediately wrapping around your right nipple. You hadn’t anticipated it. Not for a single moment had you assumed that he would do such a thing without any warning— It caught you so off guard that you reacted by immediately tugging on his hair while you moaned quietly. Johnny seemed to grin.

Somehow you had enough of your wits left about you to remember that you didn’t want to let him have all the fun. Adjusting to the feeling of having him suck on your nipple, you reached for the shoulder seams of his shirt, and you started scrunching the fabric up into your hands so that his shirt was slowly pinched up to his head, revealing his muscular back to you.

Johnny showed some mercy to you by finally neglecting both of your nipples in order to sit up and pull off his shirt. You froze up entirely. He was… Well, it wasn’t like you hadn’t seen his torso a million times before on sets and in dressing rooms— And since you started dating, there had been a few times where you were making out and you had nearly seen it all within the same context of which you were faced with in that moment… But seeing him like that made your head spin. Why did he have to look like that? Why was he as hot as he really was? And why did he have to entice you so badly with his tight abs, defined pecs, muscular arms, tight back, and his… Well, the erection that was glaringly obvious in his pants.

“You okay?”

You nodded. “Can I?” You played with the hem of his pants like he did to you before on the couch, and you bit your lip at the thought of what was waiting for you beneath those pajama pants.

He looked fazed. “Y-yeah…” And as you pulled the drawstring loose, Johnny reached out to run his thumb over your bottom lip until you released it from your teeth. “Don’t bite your lip.”

“Why not?”

“Because it makes me want you more.”

“Is that a bad thing?” You slid your hands around his hips, working your fingers into his pants slightly.

Johnny gulped again. “I want to… control myself tonight… You’re making it difficult…”

You slid his pants down over his ass, his erection still holding the front up a little bit, but you were beginning to see his groomed pubic hair. “My apologies.” With another swift movement, you finally had enough strength in you to pull his pants all the way down to his knees. You tried your best not to look at it. You wanted to show some decorum and keep looking him in the eye, but his panting chest and his flexing thighs in your peripheral vision were becoming too much to ignore.

“Is this still okay?” he asked, his finger remaining on your lip.

“Yes.”

Johnny leaned down again so that he could kiss you passionately, his hips hanging in the air, out of your reach or view, leaving you confused and yearning to know more. He had seen you struggle to behave. He knew that you were trying your best to be proper… So he saved you before you had to embarrass yourself, but that also meant that you didn’t get to indulge your curiosities either. He got to see all of you, why couldn’t you see all of him? He was the one more naked than you were.

“My pants,” you mumbled into the kiss. He blindly fumbled with it as you wished. Together, you worked to lift your hips so that he could push the fabric down just enough for you to kick it off and to the side. Now you were more naked than him. “Touch me.”

Johnny took your lead, one hand cupping the underside of your breasts while another sneakily made its way down towards your thighs. He squeezed the sponginess of your thick thighs. It took you by surprise, but it was welcomed, so you spread your legs out to make more room for him. Johnny's breath shuddered against your lips when he settled between your thighs. It was like he was most comfortable there. Not only was he able to balance himself more easily, but he was also in the prime position to thrust into you whenever you were ready. 

“More,” you pleaded with him.

“You sure?”

“Yes.”

To distract you from his anticipated movements, Johnny drifted his hand from your thigh to your slick folds, slowly running his index finger between your dripping entrance and your clit. You bucked into his touch. No one had touched you there before. No one but yourself.

“You're so wet,” he told you.

“Stop teasing...”

You weren't sure why you were jumping the gun, truth be told. He insisted on taking things slow, at your own pace. You were the one who was scared to lose your virginity in the first place— Weren't you supposed to be ashamed? Hadn’t life and the media taught you that it was embarrassing to still be a virgin at your age, despite your many efforts to remedy the issue? Wasn’t Johnny supposed to be turned off to the idea of sleeping with you once he knew that you had no experience? No… Johnny wasn’t like that, and neither were you. You both had a fight and a wit about yourselves that drew you together; You couldn’t be torn apart by something so stupid as the concept of virginity. Johnny could be an idiot sometimes, but he wasn’t that fucking stupid.

“Gotta warm you up with my fingers first, darling, I’m sorry.”

You nodded knowingly, agreeing with his statement that came off almost like a proposition. Johnny kissed you again with even more passion just before his index finger dipped into you. You pulled roughly on his hair and croaked out his name.

“You okay?”

You nodded again.

“You sure?”

“Yeah, you can keep going… Don’t stop.”

To encourage him, you swallowed your nerves then reached between your bodies, going around his own hand which was toying with you so that you could find the tip of his cock with your thumb. You weren't expecting there to be pre-cum dripping off it. Well, you knew in concept that it was possible, but you didn’t know that when you would touch him that it would be there… It was all too new to you. You didn’t know where to start. Was your thumb over his tip enough? Surely not. What if you dared to use other fingers on his wet tip? Yeah, that seemed to get a decent reaction out of him, he bucked his hips forward and gasped into your mouth. What if you did what you had seen a million times in porn and read about in plenty of smut stories… What if you wrapped your entire hand around the length of his dick?

“Jesus, baby, don’t make me cum yet.”

“I haven’t done anything.”

“You’re distracting me.” To get back at you, Johnny tried to fit his middle finger inside of you, alongside his index finger. “I’m supposed to be focused on you, remember?”

“Just want to know what you feel like…”

“And what do I feel like?”

You blushed under the intense stare of Johnny who suddenly curled his fingers directly into your g-spot like he knew you perfectly from the first day they met. How the Hell did he know that spot was there? You didn’t even know what. You couldn’t hit that spot the way he did—

“Fuck—” You turned your face to hide in the pillow. Johnny hit it again. “Fuck, J.”

“Tell me what I feel like, baby. You can do it.”

It was like he knew that the embarrassment got to you in a good way, he looked so confident above you with his fingers moving skillfully in and out of you while waiting for a proper response. Dickhead. You tried your best to get back at him by jerking him off harder, but it didn’t seem to faze him too much. Truly a confident asshole.

“Go on,” he encouraged.

“You just want me to tell you that you’re big.”

“I already know that.” He curled his fingers again. “That’s why I’ve gotta stretch you first.” And as he said that, he scissored his fingers apart then back together, and he repeated the motion a couple of times, slowly spreading you more and more to make sure that you would be able to fit all of him.

“I need you,” was all the dwindling courage left in you had to say.

Johnny seemed slightly disappointed that you couldn’t bring yourself to admit what he really wanted to hear, but there would be plenty of other times to pry that embarrassing information out of you. Plenty of opportunities. So Johnny continued to take your lead by slowly removing his fingers from your core to leave room for what would come next— However, you were surprised when Johnny stuck his middle finger in his mouth, and with his gaze glued to yours, he tasted you. You tried to hide your embarrassment from him. You used your hands to cover your face, but Johnny didn’t like that one bit. He used his dry hand to reveal your face to him again so that you had to watch as he cleaned his middle finger off completely, then with a pop he released it from his mouth.

“Do you want to try?”

You gulped. Your hand slowly drifted up his length, earning a quiet pant from Johnny, his thighs tensing, and you collected some of his pre-cum on the tips of your fingers. Johnny shivered. With your gaze still watching him in the hopes of standing up to his confidence, your touch left his aching cock before you wrapped your lips around the tip of your index finger.

“Fuck,” he whispered.

He tasted… odd… Not bad, necessarily, but it definitely wasn’t anything you were used to. You thought that you would be prepared for the “salty” taste everyone claimed semen had, yet you couldn’t have predicted the texture or the underlying flavor that you couldn’t quite put your finger on, but you wondered if you would ever be able to suck him off and swallow. Again, you didn’t hate it; Maybe it would just take some time to get used to.

You also popped your finger out of your mouth. “Wanna try?”

Johnny chortled. “Fine.”

Still keeping you on your toes, Johnny leaned over to take your middle finger in his mouth at the same time he urged you to suck on his index finger. You obliged at the same time he did. You also hadn’t expected what you would taste like. It was similar to Johnny, but also not? It somehow seemed more pleasant than his pre-cum.

Johnny moaned around your finger, and you caught a quick glimpse at his cock jumping with anticipated excitement. You already told him that he could fuck you— You made it clear multiple times, but he was the one procrastinating. What if he didn’t want to hurt you, or was worried about you rushing things just to get it over with? But you weren't like that, and he knew it… He must have been savoring the way you were genuinely overconfident for the first time, because at work it was all a facade, and with him you were too shy and scared of spooking him off that you kept quiet. You enjoyed the chance to not be afraid of what was about to happen. Johnny made you feel so comfortable that you didn’t have a moment to second guess or be fearful of any pain that the sex might cause.

“Condom, J…”

“Hold on, I’ve got some.” He leaned over to open the top drawer of his bedside table while drying his hand on his own bare thigh. Somehow in the many months of dating, you never knew about the stack of condoms he had tucked away in the far back corner of the drawer. Well, he certainly did have a reputation to uphold.

With an unsurprising amount of expertise, Johnny used his teeth to tear the packet open before holding his erection in one hand and using the other to roll the condom on. The anxiety began to kick in again. After feeling how big he was in your hand, and knowing what it felt like to be stretched by just his fingers… Now you were slightly scared. He was there, hovering over you, and the fact that it was him made it reassuring, but all the expectations you had leading up to that point were crashing down around you all at once.

“Hey,” he cooed gently, pinching your chin between his thumb and index finger, “just watch me. Hold me like this,” he guided your hands to his shoulders, “and pinch me if something’s wrong.”

You nodded silently.

He leaned in again, shifting his weight so that his hips could move towards yours while simultaneously bracing himself to kiss you. “Come here.” He laid an extremely gentle kiss on your lips, waiting to see if you would reciprocate. Your mind was so busy wandering for a minute that you couldn’t focus on him until he tilted his head to the right and started kissing you harder so that he could get you to breathe which allowed his tongue to slide into your mouth and claim dominance. You moaned when you felt Johnny’s tip brush against your clit. That gave him even more opportunity to distract you with his tongue.

You braced yourself on his shoulders and spread your legs even more when his cock drifted down your slit, landing at your dripping entrance.

“Breathe,” he moaned into your mouth.

You did as he instructed, and once you let out a deep exhale, Johnny began pushing into you. You winced slightly. The stretch was uncomfortable though not unbearable thanks to the previous efforts of his fingers. Feeling his girth push you open, and his length gliding along your slick walls was… There really weren’t any words… It felt so strange in comparison to how you imagined it. Having something inside of you like that made your stomach feel full, but in such a pleasurable way that it made you break the kiss so that you could throw your head back against the pillows.

When Johnny was settled in all the way, he paused to look at you and wait for a squeeze to his shoulders, yet it never happened.

“You okay?”

You took a deep breath in order to relax yourself. “Yeah… I think…”

“I’ve got you. Promise.”

You nodded. To hear that from him comforted you more than it ever did when you tried to remind yourself of it silently. He’s got you. He’s good to you. He wouldn’t hurt you. Those were all empty words until Johnny made them real.

“You can move.”

Johnny grinned before obliging you. Your breath got caught in your throat when his cock started dragging along your tight walls while he pulled his hips backwards. Was it supposed to feel that tight? Was he supposed to be that big? It hurt to some extent, but it felt good too, and Johnny was going slow enough that the pain was overshadowed almost entirely by the unfamiliar pleasure.

“This okay?”

“Keep going,” you begged him a bit.

Johnny's length pushed back into you, then he pulled back out. He was getting a bit faster. There was a rhythm building somewhere that you could sense, but he was giving you time to figure out if it felt good or if he needed to stop. No, don’t stop. You knew that it was pathetic, but you were almost inclined to beg him desperately to speed up and fuck you at a brutal pace like you’d always dreamed of; But Johnny wasn’t going to do that to you… Not yet, at least.

He was so gentle with you. It was like in movies when there would be a montage of bare skin and panting, maybe a tad of hair pulling here and there. Johnny was like that. He made sure to make every kiss count by letting them linger for long periods of time and the passion would vary between breaths. He held your hands, tangling your fingers together, just so he could feel if he was too fast or rough through the pulsing of your hands. If you squeezed him too tight, he slowed. If you winced, he pulled out slightly so that your walls could readjust and bear him before pressing into you again.

The only time he was certain was when you whispered into his long hair, “I’m getting close.”

Not that you were close. Not that you were cumming. But you were getting there if he kept going.

He tried to egg on another comment by nipping at your jawline and whispering back, “You’re so fucking tight… Fuck…”

While it didn’t earn him a proper response, you tugged at the strands of hair on the back of his neck in order to kiss him as hard as you could. There was a tension building in the pit of your stomach. There was a coil made of pleasure wrapping round and round, and it wasn’t a foreign feeling that scared you or made you second guess what was going on. You had touched yourself plenty of times in the past. You knew what made you cum— And that always happened with your fingers against your clit, but no one knew that about you except for Yuta ever since the asshole pried that information out of you when you were drinking. Johnny must have felt your walls fluttering around him and decided to do something about it.

“This the spot?” Johnny's fingers returned to your clit.

You moaned, throwing your head back into the pillows. “Y-yeah— J-just… just… like that… Fuck.”

Johnny was a fucking menace. While you had difficulties cumming via penetration on your own, the way Johnny worked his length in and out of you, his tip hitting all the right spots, and he played with your clit so fast, all of it had you seeing stars… At least his reputation paid off. At least it wasn’t all talk. He definitely knew what he was doing, which picked up the slack when you had no idea where to look or touch, and you couldn’t bring yourself to speak any more than necessary out of fear that you’d turn him off in an instant. You were too close to the edge to fuck it up.

“You’re close, aren’t you?”

You nodded.

“Gonna cum on my cock, pretty girl?”

You had never heard him speak like before, you didn’t expect to ever hear anything like that from him. Was it all those years of experience that taught him how to talk dirty to girls? Or was he doing that just for your sake? Why did you feel like if you tried that then it would be cringe as fuck and you'd turn yourself off? But when it came from him, it did everything it was supposed to.

“I’m close.”

That was a step up from before. Johnny was immediately encouraged to fuck you even faster, his abs tightening as much as possible, his biceps bulging even more to the point that you were concerned they were going to pop at any moment. The way he panted in your ear was a telltale sign that he too was close. His head fell into the crook of your neck, his breath hot against your skin, his lips wet from licking and biting them so often throughout the whole ordeal; and Johnny began muttering a bunch of nonsense that you couldn’t understand while he was buried against you and moaning desperately with every thrust.

The coil in your stomach finally snapped when Johnny hit a new spot deep within you as his pelvis met your core entirely. A sinful moan left you in the process. Your eyes blurred slightly, so you squeezed them shut to not think about it and to focus solely on how Johnny's hips were still but his fingers were doing so much work on your clit in order to help you ride out your orgasm. Johnny let out a breath, then thrusted another two times… and with a grunt and, “I’m cumming,” Johnny came in the condom he was wearing. You laid there while you also let Johnny hit his high appropriately. You weren't sure if there was anything you could say or do, so you remained in your position to allow him to use you however he needed while you participated by pulling on his hair and kissing his neck.

“Fuck, princess…” He slumped on top of you.

You both laid there as you tried to catch your breaths and stop your heads from spinning.

“You feeling okay?”

“Yeah,” you said with a slight giggle.

“It was okay?”

You laughed even more and hit him. “Yes, stupid.”

He also chuckled as he pulled out of you and took off the condom which he tied shut then tossed into the trash can nearby. He flipped over onto his back beside you. “You promise it was good—”

“I promise. Stop worrying.” You turned to lay on your side to face him. “Thank you.”

Johnny grinned and reached out so that he could play with your swollen bottom lip. “But you promise you actually came, right—”

You shut him up with a kiss mixed with another giggle that made Johnny laugh too. It wasn’t so scary in hindsight. Sure, there was pain, as expected, but that had subsided so fast thanks to the care Johnny put into making sure that it was perfect, almost like he had been planning what your first time together would be like— Except he probably hadn’t anticipated taking your virginity, too, but he didn’t seem to mind once it happened. You were relieved. All those years you spent worrying over it and being self-conscious about it now made you feel stupid beyond comparison.

taglist: @hisunflower , @zozojella , @l4na3s , @taehyungnl , @theycallmesya , @peachytokki , @neotechclub , @drxmxss , @evergreeneyesx , @got-sum-badhabits , @putlonghatdog ,

[animelovelover123]

Devil May Cry Boys During Threesomes

Parings: Dante, Reboot Dante, Vergil, Reboot Vergil, Nero, and V x Reader

Synopsis: Short snippets of three-ways between you and two of the boys, because why have one man when you can have two?

Sequel here with added Urizen, Credo, Sparda, Nelo Angelo, and Kat.

Trigger Warnings: These stories have the boys focusing on you, and maybe you subscribed to the “it's not gay if it's in a three-way” idea, but just in case, Spardacest warning. There is only one moment when any of the boys show interest in pleasing the other man (I’ll put that part first so you can skip it if you have a problem with it) and another story where… well let’s just say there is a double-ended dildo involved.

Also bondage, edging, overstimulation, implied double penetration, blindfolding, sex toy, collar and leash, a little sacrilegious talk

Nero & Dante

As soon as you start to lose momentum, your legs losing strength and your body growing tired from the rhythmic bouncing, Nero picks up the slack. With his hands on your hips, he holds you up while he thrusts up into you. Or, if he is really feeling it, lifting and lowering you onto him. This meant that the sound of slapping skin and squishing liquid mingled with the three heavy breaths never let up. That’s the one distracting thing though, the third voice. Nero may be engaging with you, not just with his shaft but also with his lips and fingers that just can’t seem to stop marking your perfect skin, but the third person in this ensemble who seemed content to sit back and simply watch.

“You know, this isn't supposed to be a show.” Nero shot over your shoulder at Dante who was sitting in a chair a few feet from the bed you and Nero were on. “Or are you waiting for your Viagra to kick in old man?” He joked despite it being clear that Dante needed no assistance in getting excited. Dante even chuckled at the remark.

“No, I just didn’t want to steal the show from you kid.” Dante teased right back, his hand still slowly stroking his cock to keep it ready but not too stimulated. Getting off alone wouldn’t be much fun now would it? “But I can wait my turn, makes the pay off all the better don’t you think?” Dante leaned back in his chair, spreading his legs a bit more, and shooting you a wink.

“Ya maybe, but the whole point of this was to properly satisfy this little vixen. Right baby?” Nero asked as he gave one of your ass cheeks a solid smack. Nothing that hurt, but the sound was sharp and the jiggle was enough to make Dante groan quietly at the sight. “So come on,” Nero turned his attention back to Dante. He pulled on your upper back to make you lean forward a bit so that your butt stuck out more. Nero then grabbed either cheek and spread them so Dante had a clear view. “Join the party.”

Dante’s eyes scanned over your body as Nero offered it to him and for a second he seemed to consider something. Then his lips twisted up into a mischievous grin.

“You know, you’re right.” Dante stood from the chair, releasing his cock to instead grab the bottle of lube off the bedside table. “But you know, there is still one more problem. Which one do I go for?” Dante asked but before either you or Nero could say anything, Dante grabbed one of Nero’s legs. In one swift motion, Dante yanked on Nero, making Nero fall back onto the bed and you to fall forward over him. With you two in this position, Dante had access to both Nero’s and your back entrances. Dante’s tongue flicked out to lick at his lips. “On second thought, going back and forth might be even better.”

==+==+==

I tried to avoid having the boys focus on each other since it would just turn into a ship fiction and that’s not the point. But I thought of Dante being his usual confident, out-of-pocket self and doing this and I wanted to use it.

Dante & V

“Songbird~” V moaned in your ear, his chest flush against yours while his hips alternated back from sharp thrusts to sensual grinding. His hands held your hips gently. He would usually wrap you in his embrace, but right now another body blocked him.

“Look V, their legs are shaking.” Dante said, his tone a mix of amusement, desire, and sadistic excitement. Dante could feel your legs every movement as you were sat in his lap, your legs spread on either side of his own. Your back was pressed up against his chest, acting as a backboard of sorts to hold you in place while V picked up speed again.

They both fell quiet, watching you intently. They knew your signs, the tells of when you were just about to reach your peak. And just as the rush was about to kick in, everything stopped. No matter how you protested, it went just the same way as it had done the last two times. Dante had his arms wrapped about your middle, holding your arms and hips down, while V pulled out and away. However this time, unlike the first round, it seemed a lot harder for V to will himself away. He was shaking a bit too and his hands clenched and flexed in an attempt to control himself. He was still aroused, painfully so in fact, just like you and Dante. But there was a thrill in that discomfort and a rush of desire when you protested your third denial.

“Alright V, time to trade.” Dante announced, somewhat impatiently as he released you only to flip your quivering body around.

“Of course.” Even though V’s body was just as wound up as yours, he still carried himself with grace. “Come to me, my dear.” V held you a lot gentler than Dante, more like a cradle to his chest rather than a restrictive hold. He did slide his hands down your arms, gently grabbed your wrists, and lifted them to wrap around his neck, creating a closer bond and making it easy for him to grab and hold you back if need be. You could feel his length, just as hard, poking at your back. But that was paid no mind as Dante settled himself between your legs, his own cock standing tall and eager for attention.

“Alright baby, let's take a few deep breaths and then we can go again.” Dante instructed, his hands messaging your tense and strained thigh muscles. “Forth time the charm, right?”

==+==+==

For my friend and editor who wanted some edging. Feel lucky that I used the idea on my two favourite boys to self-insert romance. Tis an honour you know? lol

V & Nero

Nero collapsed against your back, his weight pushing you down onto the mattress that you had been pressed against and crying out in pleasure into, for the last few minutes. His chest heaved as he dragged in desperate breaths, creating an airflow that you could feel through your damp hair. The sudden movement caused his dick to slide out of you, unplugging you so that his third shot of seed dripped out to join the wet patch caused by his last two rounds.

“Well done~” Purred the silky smooth voice of V who was sitting on the edge of the bed. He reached over and ran his fingers through your hair both as a soothing pet and to brush your hair aside so he could look at your face. “How are you feeling my songbird? Tired?” He guessed as he gazed at your expression and how limp your body lay at this point. Suddenly though, Nero stirred.

“So good.” He practically moaned between panting breaths. He began to grind against your ass and his hands ran down your sides. “You feel so fuckin’ good baby.”

“Such an impatient boy.” Teased V, moving his hand away from your head to grab Nero’s shoulder and gently pull to encourage him to move away from you. “But it would be best if we give our beloved a break. We wouldn’t want to completely ravish her, not so quickly at least.” V more so ordered than suggested as he was calm enough to see how exhausted you were, but Nero didn’t listen. All Nero could hear was the hunger inside him demanding that he keep chasing that blissful high of filling you.

“More.” Nero growled as he pushed off the bed so he sat back on his legs. “Just a bit more.” He ignores any gentle protest you try to make as he grabs your hips and lifts them. He then lets go with one hand so he can grab his cock and drag its head up and down your folds, spreading his escaping seed. The sight of you already marked by him making his desire burn hotter. “Come on baby, you can give me another one right? I’ll make you feel soooo good.” Nero stared at your flexing hole as it tensed in anticipation, a part of his brain telling him it was a challenge. However, just as he started to push in, he was suddenly yanked back by the collar around his neck.

“My goodness Nero, I expected you to be better trained than this.” V criticized, though the smile curling his lips showed how he found Nero’s actions more amusing than bothersome, as he tightly gripped the end of the leash line. Nero’s leather collar had a matching leather leash that was wrapped around a ring on the wall above the headboard of the bed. When V pulled back on the other end, it forced Nero closer to the wall and away from you. “You need to learn to restrain that hunger of yours, then maybe we wouldn’t have to tie you up like this.”

“Please, no.” Nero struggled against the collar, though it was imbued with magic so he could not break it even with his demonic strength. Still, his mind was so clouded by lust that he clawed at the collar with one hand and used the other to attempt to grab you and pull you closer. “I need it. I need you baby.” Nero’s words came out almost like demands. They were deep and sharp, and you could see the primal demonic energy reach out a bit through his eyes that started to shine. V could tell that Nero couldn’t be reasoned with anymore, and that also meant that he was easier to set off.

“If you aren’t going to behave, then you’ll just have to be punished.” V’s smile turned mischievous as he hooked the leash to the post at the foot of the bed, meaning Nero was held right up against the wall where the ring was. V then scooped you up into his arms and away from Nero, who growled under his breath as you were taken further out of his reach. V’s hands slowly roamed your body, his touch a lot gentler than Nero’s, almost soothing to your worn muscles, but were also sensual in their caressing and messaging. V turned his head and whispered in your ear loud enough for Nero to hear while his eyes watched for Nero’s reaction. “Let me show you how to properly treat our sweet songbird.”

==+==+==

I don’t know why I am so into ferial beast Nero. Maybe it's how he looks in DMC5, making him more rugged, dirty, and aggressive-looking. It is a nice contrast to V though, imo.

Nero & Vergil

(Here is a link to a video giving examples of BPMs. You might need it for reference.)

Nero could hardly believe it and he was sitting there watching it happen. It was like something out of a porno, but unlike the actors who could only hold that pace for a few seconds, Vergil’s stamina had you breathless for minutes on end. If Nero, with his love for music, had to describe it he would say Vergil was pounding into you at a consistent bpm of 300-500. You didn’t even have the time to cry out or moan, only gasp and squeak between each thrust. It was almost worth the interruption and insults as it boggled Nero’s mind while being undeniably hot watching you barely hold it together. Even with you bent over and gripping a stool, that shook and scrapped against the floor harshly as if it was about to give way under the assault itself, you would not be able to stay on your feet if Vergil wasn’t holding your hips with a grip that would definitely leave small bruises aligned with his fingertips. Your fingers were white with strain in holding the stool, at least when your hand wasn’t smacking the stool in excess stress or reaching back towards Vergil. Your hair and body sook and jiggled harshly, especially when you kept shaking your head as if trying to communicate that it was too much and that you would not last but Vergil did not give you the ability to speak even if you wanted to.

Vergil, for his part was focused in a way Nero had never seen before. The way his lips tightened into a line, his brows knit in consideration, and the glistening sweat sliding down his face was different than his usual stoic demeanour, even when fighting, yet matched him perfectly. Even though this all started with Vergil’s determination to showcase his superiority, instead of looking to Nero to make sure he was watching, Vergil’s focus was on you. And even as he felt his own climax approaching he would not settle for a one-sided satisfaction. He let go of one of your hips to wrap his arm around your upper chest. His arm muscles flex as he pulls you to his chest, his arm acting like a bar that held you in place and took the brunt of your grabbing and clawing at it as your body reacted to the intense stimulation. Your body jerked and spasmed as Vergil ramped up towards 1000 bpm to properly fuck you through your orgasm. He slowed a bit as his own hit before suddenly dropping you. You try to catch yourself on the stool but your legs collapse like paper under you, bringing you to your knees as you cling to the stool to not fully hit the ground. You can feel the last few spurts of Vergil’s cum hit your back, adding to the almost degrading feeling.

“There,” Vergil said, sounding barely out of breath and still completely in control. “You better have learned from this boy.” Vergil said to Nero like a mildly upset teacher. “I hope for their sake,” Vergil motioned towards your limp body desperately dragging in breaths. “you do better next time or I will have to keep giving you this lesson.”

==+==+==

I don’t know why, but the mental image of Vergil fucking to the beat of Spoiler from Cyberpunk 2077 has been in my brain for the last year. Hopefully, it will leave me alone now. I don’t even like OG Vergil! I know Nero was barely part of this but I had to get the image out of my head and there is also something kind of hot about Vergil having to teach his son how to do it right~

Vergil & Dante

“I can’t believe your lack of tact brother.” Vergil sighed in frustration.

“Tackt? The hell do you know about tack in this situation?” Dante rolled his eyes.

The twins were fighting again, like usual. This was a daily occurrence, except usually you weren’t sitting sandwiched between them as they attempted to share you. But you all knew before this started that sharing was never an option, it was a fight over you.

“Have you ever stopped training long enough to even sleep with a girl before, you nerd?” Dante asked as he finally slid his hand out of your top to grab the neckline, intending to properly undo it, but then Vergil suddenly grabbed the other side.

“Unlike you, I don’t need to practice on insignificant fools just to figure out how to please a woman.” Vergil said smugly as he tugged on your shirt collar, signalling that he wanted to undo it.

“Or maybe you just don’t know how to get the stick out of your ass and pick up women!” Dante shouted back, the comment clearly getting on his nerves. As he did though, he yanked on the collar of your shirt, and with Vergil holding the other end firmly and them both having inhuman strength, it caused that article to rip open, which was a similar fate that your pants suffered not long before.

When you flinched at the loud tearing sound and the chill of the air hitting your now-exposed torso, the twins turned their attention to you.

“Are you alright?" Vergil asked, letting go of his half of your ripped shirt to run a hand up your torso, checking for any possible marks their rough treatment might have caused.

“Oops, sorry about that.” Dante said with a chuckle as he tossed his half aside and cuddled a bit closer to your side. “I’ll buy you a new one, promise.” He sealed the promise with a kiss to your cheek.

“With what money?” Vergil scoffed as he lifted your chin a bit to kiss your jaw, refusing to let Dante have anything over him.

“With the money I make from my business.” Dante answered before peppering your neck with kisses.

“The one that hasn’t gotten a job in weeks?” Vergil bites your neck lightly.

“At least I have income!” Dante bit down hard enough to make you jerk and to leave a mark.

“You can barely take care of yourself, how do you expect to care for her?” Vergil made a head gesture towards you while his hand dragged down your stomach and right into your panties. “I know how to treat this angle as she deserve.” Vergil said with a bit more sultry passion, which was aided by how two of his fingers slid between your slick folds. “Isn’t that right love?” Vergil whispers to you as he easily slips his fingers into you.

“And you think I don’t?” Dante shouted back with a sharp glare as he shoved his hand into your underwear as well. “I make her feel like she is in heaven.” Dante turns to you, his scowl softening into a determined and almost pleading look. “Right baby? I make you feel better than anything you could imagine.” He shoves his own pair of fingers into you alongside Vergil’s. With the doubling up the sensation was a bit more intense.

“Love.” Vergil called quietly as he curled his fingers.

“Baby.” Dante called as well as he began to pump his fingers in and out at a steady pace. “I make you feel better than him, right?” This makes Vergil tear his eyes away from you to glare at Dante with enough intensity to strike fear in a mortal man.

“You wanna bet?” He asked, pulling his fingers out of you to grab the belt of his pants.

“You’re damn right I do.” Dante's smile was smug as he also reached for his own belt buckle.

==+==+==

I HAD to have them bicker the whole time, it is like, the law. I picture this taking place when they are DMC3 age. Imagine, instead of fighting and ruining their relationship, the twins banded together to make sure you drown in love and pleasure. Fuckin’ yes please!

OG & Reboot Dante

Dante was so close, yet nowhere near close enough. The older Dante that is. The younger Dante was doing good, his hands pawing and messaging your chest at a satisfying intensity and rhythm while his lips worked up and down the back of your neck. The other Dante, though, was taking his damn sweet time.

He was kneeling between your spread limbs, his hands caressing your legs and hips while his lips trailed along the sensitive skin of your inner thigh. He would kiss, nip, suck, and lick his way up towards where you need him most. Then he would go back down towards your knees. You may think he was just a fan of longer foreplay, but if you watch him carefully you can see how pleased with himself he got when you whined and whimpered each time he pulled away from your core, the teasing jerk.

“Dante… more…” You requested, but it was not the older Dante that answered.

“Sure thing baby.” The younger Dante’s soft lips on your neck were replaced with a sharp bite of his teeth. He stopped the messaging of your chest to instead pinch your nipples, giving them a good tug.

“Wait, Dante, stop!” You interject.

“Right, sorry.” The older Dante fully pulled away, sitting back and lifting his hands up. Despite his apology like he had thought that you were talking to him, the smugness of his grin and quirked brow told you that he knew exactly what you had meant. And quickly you were shown that the younger Dante knew too because when you start to complain they both laugh.

It was going to be a long night.

==+==+==

The only reason I have the twins and their Reboot versions working together is so I could make this stupid joke of the Dante’s being little, pleased with themselves shitheads. I love them both. <3

Reboot Dante & Vergil

“Fuck, stop it!” Dante shouted, his body spasming in reaction to the stimuli which only made things worse. “Stop moving!”

“You’re the one who won’t stay still.” Vergil shot back in a tone sharper than he would like. He always did his best to be the more composed of the two, but at this point, he could barely keep his breath steady. And every incessant wiggle, jerk, and fidget Dante made would cause a ripple effect onto, or should I say into, him.

“Can you take this shit out already?” Dante turned his anger, caused by strain and embarrassment, towards you.

You were circling around the two men, gazing down at their glistening backs and watching each muscle twist and roll. You had both their amulets draped around your neck, the obvious reason being to limit their ability to fight back. But it was also a mark asserting your dominance and their places’ as yours. They were both on their knees, respective hands bound behind their backs with a third rope linking them together a foot apart, facing away from each other. Between them, disappearing and appearing at random intervals as Dante kept fidgeting and Vergil did his best to follow the movement to minimize the effect, was a double-ended dildo. Something that they both claimed they wanted away from, not that they could get away with how you had bound their calves to each other’s and the rope tethering their wrist together, yet the way their cocks dripped precum onto the floor told a different story.

“Haven't we had enough?” Vergil added when he noticed your mind had drifted from Dante’s crassly worded request. When you did not answer right away, Dante got more restless.

“God damn it.” Dante began to thrash a bit against his restraint, but soon the jerky motions transitioned into something smoother. “Just… fuck!” Dante’s hips started to unconsciously roll and bounce backward, making the dildo thrust into him.

Dante may not have realized what he was doing, but Vergil certainly did. He tried to hold his breath to stop a moan from slipping out, still trying to deny how good he felt. His body, like Dante’s, betrayed his resolve though as, instead of pulling away from Dante’s thrusts that forced the dildo in and out of them both, Vergil strengthened his stance and held his position.

It takes quite a while, both men being prideful and stubborn, but eventually they break.

“Please, I’m begging you.” Vergil murmurs, cheek pressed to the floor, his usual prim hairstyle flopped over and askew.

“Baby… baby I can’t fuckin’ take it anymore.” Dante’s chest heaved with each breath and drool dripped from the corner of his lip as he looked up at you.

Eventually, you release them, maybe after a bit more begging and them calling you a special title if you feel like it. You untie their legs but not their hands or the rope that links them together. This gives them the space to get the dildo to slide out of them both but not enough to separate so they instead sit back to back with each other on the floor. In the midst of trying to catch their breath though, you call to them.

You sit yourself on a plush chair and finally invite them to you, opening your legs. However, with your positioning and how they are tied together, only one of them would get to have you first. It was a ploy to have them fight a bit. You knew this. They knew this. But they were so on edge from the previous experience that they still fought with all their strength to have the pleasure to get to feel your velvety walls around them first.

==+==+==

I was struggling a bit with forming an idea for this one since I didn’t want it to be just a repeat of OG Dante and Vergil. Then I realized that none of the other parts had YOU being dominant over the boys, so here we are.

Reboot & OG Vergil

You were almost done. It had been 3 agonizing hours but you were almost finished. But why did this guy have to keep talking?

“And I also believe…” The person continued, unaware of your struggle as you sat silently biting your lip and hovering just above your chair just in case.

This was an important meeting and would aid in your collective cause greatly. But it was hard to keep that in mind when at random intervals your specially made undergarments would spring to life, vibrating in either a slow burn or a harsh jolt of sensation. And the worst part was, you didn’t know which of your lovers to shoot a glare or desperate look towards since they both had controllers tucked under the table. Your two Vergils may be different in a lot of ways, but both were masters at poker faces, the younger Vergil’s being a polite smile while the older Vergil’s was bordering on a scowl constantly. So there was no way to tell which of the two suddenly cranked the intensity. They didn’t even seem to notice the way you jolt or the little noises that shot from your lips before you could catch them, unlike the third party who would occasionally glance at you in concern but kept being waved off and told to continue, but you knew better. You have been with them long enough to know that the Vergils were taking a sadistic kind of pleasure in having you at their mercy, making you squirm and turning your body and mind to mush under the on-and-off assault for the past few hours.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, the meeting wraps up and the man leaves. As the younger Vergil was seeing them off, the older Vergil watched you carefully. He didn’t say a word, just studied you, the corners of his lips twisted up into the faintest of smiles. Once you both could hear the younger Vergil approaching the meeting room, he stood and approached you.

“Yes, you can head home for today. We will lock up.” You could hear the younger Vergil say to the last of his workers who were hanging around the complex still through the door before he slipped inside with a sigh. “Well that took longer than expected, but this is another step closer to securing our control.” The younger Vergil said as he locked the door. “Now…” He moved to stand on one side of your chair, effectively boxing you in as the older Vergil had positioned himself on your other side. “we can deal with you.” The younger Vergil’s voice dropped a couple of octaves as he gazed down at your slightly trembling form.

“Stand.” The older Vergil ordered, arms crossed as if ready to discipline you if you hesitated.

You slowly brought yourself to your feet, struggling as your legs were tired from flexing in reaction to the sudden burst of vibration and the fact that you spent the last half hour of the meeting hovering an inch above your seat to avoid any attention-grabbing noises. Neither of the Vergil’s helped you up, only waiting patiently while enjoying the blatant effects their medaling has had on your body.

“I must admit, I am impressed.” The older Vergil continued once you were standing. “You held yourself together well, even when that fool kept droning on when he wasn’t asked.”

“And the fact that you put on the lingerie we left for you without even being asked~” The younger Vergil added, scanning your body from head to toe as if he could see your undergarments through your clothing. The lingerie had been left out for you, spread out atop your bed for you with no note. When they did this you knew it was not simply a gift, but an order, so not wearing it was not really an option. Still, the two men were pleased. “I think our dearest deserves a reward.” The younger Vergil hummed as he stepped closer, one hand gliding across your shoulders and moving aside your hair so his hot breath could glide across your neck.

The older Vergil joined in, also stepping closer. His hand started at your middle back and slowly sunk lower. His head leaned in so his lips brushed against your ear as he whispered, “I couldn’t agree more.”

==+==+==

I was originally going for a rich sugar daddy kind of thing where they keep and control you (think Jumin Han from Mystic Messenger) but I worried that that might be a bit much for people. It got diluted into this which isn’t bad, but I feel it is a bit generic. Oh well, still hot though.

Vergil & V

You couldn’t see anything. The silky blindfold wrapped snuggly around your head and the darkness of the night made you completely blind, which both strengthened and discombobulated your other senses. You can reach out for things but you didn’t know where anything was, how close or how far, meaning that if you do finally find something it is sudden and a shock. Worst though was that the things you wanted to touch most would purposely evade your reach. You could hear, but you didn’t. They were circling you, you could feel their eyes on you like a sixth sense, but they were practically silent. If you were lucky you could catch the creek of the floor, but other than that the only time you got to hear them is when they spoke to you or each other. But even then they would go back and forth, still moving, making it hard to nail down their position.

“You are a stunning creature.” Vergil said, his eyes racking over your nude form.

“A beauty that rivals the most awe-inspiring of art pieces.” Came V’s voice as just the tips of someone's fingers glided along your collarbone before disappearing, leaving you wanting for more, just unsure where to reach to get it. “I just want to stare at your visage all day my dearest songbird.”

“Watching can be nice,” Says Vergil as hands grab your shoulders. You might assume Vergil grabbed both, but you were being held by two right hands. Which belonged to which man was unclear. “But isn’t there something alluring about defiling art?” One of the hands, which seemed to come from in front of you, moves up into your hair. The other, coming to your side, wrapped around your neck in a gentle hold. “Perverting it, making it completely our own?”

“To dirty such an immaculate creature such as our love… one could call it a sin.” Both hands on you tighten a bit. Then the hand in your hair starts to pull you forward while the one on your neck slides to your back, between your shoulder blades, and pushes. “But we were never welcome in the pearly gates, were we?”

“How foolish.” Vergil scoffed. The two hands work together to guide you into bending over. “There is no need to concern ourselves with anything outside of this moment.” The tip of something hot, warm, and slick pressed into your cheek. Without your sight, you couldn’t tell whose it was, but if you reach out to grasp it or take it into your mouth you could figure it out. And soon you felt a similar heat nestle itself between your legs, encouraging you to squeeze your tights together around it. “Because there isn’t anything in heaven or hell that can stop us from taking what is ours.”

==+==+==

This was another one I had a bit of trouble with. I came up with the base idea of them blindfolding you and doing the brief touches then disappearing right away, but I couldn’t decide on specifics. Like, are you tied up? Are you being led around the room or are you still? How long? In the end, I am really happy with what I made, though I did not expect to get a little religious there.

(Divider by @frenchkisstheabyss)

I need to practice writing sex scenes. I have told myself this again and again but I always struggle. If you have read a lot of my stuff you may have noticed that I tend to skirt around the actual sex, either writing general bullet points or leading up to it and then skirting around the action itself. This thing is, and I know it is wired, but I can openly be like “ya, Vergil’s DT in DMC5 has a dragon dick” but trying to actually write, in some detail, sex makes me all embarrassed. I can call someone “a dick” jokingly, but trying to say or write “dick” in a sensual sense just makes me… geagehgeshvdggsrshdwit, I can’t take it! I need to get over it though because I have all these spicy ideas and can visualize them but can’t write them down for other people to enjoy. Also, sex is full of repetitive motions and sounds and I don’t know how to make that interesting yet. So I wrote these, hoping that I could write more blatant sex scenes and I still beat around the bush a bit but I think this is better, right?

Also, anyone notice what I did with how I ordered these? We worked real hard on it. ^^

[coelii]

let’s talk Castlevania lore~

so it occurred to me that, within the game material (I haven’t watched the TV show or anything like that so that’s not personally interesting to me for this discussion, sry sry), we don’t have all THAT clear an idea of why Dracula is A Bad Guy Who Must Be Stopped At All Costs, do we? I kinda feel like it’s mostly just treated as “c’mon, it’s Dracula, let’s go vampire killin’”

I mean we’ve got the accusation that he “steals men’s souls and makes them [his] slaves,” and, okay, if true (do we ever, like, see that?) I guess that’s pretty not great. And I’m willing to accept just a priori that he is A Vampire and therefore, okay, presumably there’s some drinking of innocent blood or something, not ideal. (Again, not sure that ever occurs on-screen?) I guess he also cursed Simon to have some pretty horrible nights? That’s not rad, i guess.

But like, fundamentally, do we ever have actual word in the games/game material of what exactly Dracula’s menace really IS? Just what kind of fate is the Belmont clan (et al.*) supposedly protecting us from? I guess I probably don’t want to live next door to an Active Vampire, but honestly it’s pretty amusing to me that I can’t actually think of what Dracula supposedly, like, wants.

(*from the Latin “et Alucard”)

So if we’re strictly looking at game material (and specifically main game and not the Lords of Shadow reboot) in my opinion there’s two origin games that have made a case for Dracula’s desires.

Castlevania Lament of Innocence

As covered in another recent ask, this is the official first game in the timeline

Here you play as Leon Belmont whose betrothed Sara is kidnapped by an ancient vampire named Walter Bernhard. Leon’s close friend Mathias Cronqvist, an alchemist who is grief stricken over the loss of his wife Elisabetha (who died of an illness while he was away), informs Leon that Walter was the one who kidnapped Sara and Leon goes to save her. Over the course of the game you learn that there are two powerful vampire relics and Walter is in possession of one: the Ebony Stone that produces darkness and makes Walter effectively invulnerable (as he is strongest in the darkness the stone produces).

You also create the Vampire Killer whip during the game which has the power to break the Ebony Stone and make Walter susceptible to damage. At the game’s climax, when Walter is close to Death (both metaphorically and physically) it’s revealed that Leon’s buddy Mathias had the other vampire relic, the Crimson Stone, the whole time. This relic absorbs the souls and power of other vampires (kind of a Ghostbuster situation).

Walter’s soul is captured in the stone, but Mathias uses it for his own dark purposes - to become a vampire himself and take revenge against God (whom he curses for taking his wife from him). Mathias eventually gives up his name and adopts the name Dracula instead and is canonically the Dracula in all Castlevania Games.

This origin story unfortunately leaves a lot to be desired in Dracula’s motivations because it basically amounts to Dracula being a man who’s just mad that God took his wife from him and uses another Vampire’s power (Walter) as his own. He isn’t noble or powerful without the stone (which is this red thing he wears in much of the official artwork apparently)

But I guess “stick it to the man” is technically a motivation…

Castlevania Legends

Now I’m a Lament of Innocence denier personally and would prefer to use the older games as the source to answer this question.

According to the Legend’s instruction book the story is:

IT WAS THE MIDDLE AGES IN TRANSYLVANIA. ONE MAN CAME INTO POSSESSION OF AN EVIL POWER, AND THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS WAS BORN. BEFORE LONG, THIS BEING HAD USED HIS NEW-FOUND SUPERNATURAL POWERS AND THE MAGIC POWERS OF HIS FOLLOWERS TO SPREAD HIS PLAGUE OF DARKNESS AND DESPAIR THROUGHOUT THE EUROPEAN CONTINENT, HE WAS COUNT DRACULA. EVEN TO MENTION THE NAME OF THIS PRINCE OF DARKNESS WAS TO CAST FEAR INTO THE HEARTS OF THE PEOPLE IN THE LAND, WHO WERE POWERLESS TO DO ANYTHING SAVE VOICE THEIR CONCERN. HOWEVER, AT ABOUT THE SAME TIME A BABY GIRL POSSESSING SPECIAL POWERS WAS BORN TO A FAMILY LIVING IN A REMOTE AREA OF THE COUNTRY. "YOUR POWERS ARE MEANT FOR A HIGHER PURPOSE AND NOT ONLY FOR YOURSELF” SHE WAS OFTEN REMINDED AS SHE WAS GROWING UP. THE PLOT OF THIS GIRL'S FATE BEGAN TO DEVELOP ONE NIGHT IN HER SEVENTEENTH YEAR WHEN SHE MET UP WITH THE YOUNG ENIGMATIC ALUCARD, WHO WAS ON A JOURNEY TO SEARCH FOR THE FATHER THAT HAD DESERTED HIM. THE YOUNG GIRL'S NAME WAS SONIA BELMONT, AND SHE WAS THE FIRST OF THE VAMPIRE HUNTERS IN THE BELMONT FAMILY TO BECOME LEGENDARY.

Now unfortunately this doesn’t tell us too much. In this origin Dracula exists already, obtained his power by coming “into possession” of it, and his motivation is simply “spread his plague of darkness and despair throughout the European continent” (Africa, Asia, the Americas, and Australia are all safe apparently).

Now I don’t want to theorycraft too far off the actual game material here, but I do know that Vampire Hunter D was heavily inspirational to the development of Castlevania. Many people know the anime films, but Vampire Hunter is a series of novels first published in 1983 (three years before the first CV game was released) and in these novels the being known as the “Sacred Ancestor” is the progenitor of all the other vampires and the oldest among them. He is known as the Vampire King or God and D is the Sacred Ancestor’s son (so to speak). This was the inspiration for Alucard, who we know in Castlevania lore to be Dracula’s direct descendant.

The VH novels present vampires as a race unto themselves, not the traditional mythos of humans given vampiric power (although they can still create vampires from humans).

Novel #17: White Devil Mountain (published 2014) is more explicit in this stating that vampires predate humans by possibly millions of years. The Sacred Ancestor, as the oldest among them, felt it was his duty to watch over his people and did many experiments over the years to try and save his race from eventual extermination (not necessarily by the hands of Hunters, but through a variety of circumstances). Some experiments included inventions that could block out the sun and give eternal darkness (a common theme in vampire lore).

The Dracula of Castlevania seems as much inspired by Bram Stoker’s creation and the historical Vlad Tepes as he was by Vampire Hunter’s Sacred Ancestor.

If the Sacred Ancestor’s motivation was as ward and protector of his race, acting in various ways to save them and ensure their continued reign and existence then I would say Dracula’s motivation is similar: “spread his plague of darkness” by ensuring that the curse of night spreads and his people can remain powerful and eternal.

In Short

Both games present Dracula as a man who obtained power through unholy means. Walter Bernhard’s origins aren’t necessarily explained in the game and it’s possible that like Vampire Hunter D he is of a race of vampires older than humanity and Dracula simply is just a man using his power as his own. However I feel Dracula’s motivation may still be similar to that of the Sacred Ancestor from VH: with great power comes great responsibility (thanks Ben!) and his duty is to protect and allow his people to thrive in a world hellbent on destroying them.

[lunarriviera]

the huo daofu round-up post i have been threatening for a really long time now

Thinking about this man, I was just admitting to chat "honestly cannot believe how much life energy i have invested in such a minor character" but the truth of the matter is, I was mildly obsessed with Huo Daofu from Reboot alone; his odd unresolved backstory in Sha Hai just cemented my mental formation. Because let's be real, in a world of overly earnest tomb raiders, this man is a goddamn catty delight. The dainty bitterness! The barely concealed eye-rolling! So many impeccable That Bitch vibes. And his unimpressed snark is honestly such a refreshing antidote to Wu Xie's whole everyone-loves-him Marty Sue thing that even when you discover Huo Daofu secretly ALSO loves him, you don't mind, because by that point Dr. Youtiao is a savage queen who can do no wrong.

And He Longlong clearly made this guy up. In the novels he's just sort of a vaguely beardy guy who drives a truck, that's literally all I remember him ever doing. But someone cast this man, and they gave him some rubber bands and pizza coupons and chewed gum of a script to work with, and he promptly decided: I will make him extremely gay. And staggeringly bitchy. AND IT WORKS. He devours every frame he's in, he steals every scene. It's a performance worthy of Alan Rickman and yes I will die upon this hill.

We all know the bitchy-ex-boyfriend scenes in Reboot—"oh my god I literally can't wait for you to perish from lungs" and then Huo Daofu spends like every moment trying to keep Wu Xie alive, sheltering him uselessly from the rain with his hand, rubbing his back when he coughs, looking (when no one's watching but the camera) like he's maybe going to stop breathing himself, when Wu Xie does.

Apparently Huo Daofu's name sounds very silly in Chinese which I think is appropriate for someone who apparently (?) grew up in Germany (?) and went to the University of Heidelberg (?) (honestly don't waste time trying to figure out DMBJ canon, NPSS has thoughtfully ensured that will only be exhausting and futile). Spurious medical qualifications aside, he's super handy in fanfic, too, when you need a sketchy doctor, as all tomb-raiding mob families invariably do.

[someone once pointed out to me that this combination of degree topics basically translates into "how to dispose of bodies"]

I could also hold forth on him and Yang Hao—like, Su Wan alone makes it REAL clear that Huo Daofu's interest in the kid isn't just avuncular or entrepreneurial:

"Are you working for him, or are you working for him?" And Su Wan should be protective, because Yang Hao is honestly kind of an idiot, and probably doesn't realize he's being assiduously groomed not just as a mob boss but as a potential boy toy. (NB by the way that there are 44 fics in the Huo Daofu/Yang Hao tag, and disappointingly, not a single one of them is in English. Western fandom needs Jesus.)

But the thing is, Huo Daofu SAVES his ass in Gutongjing. Everyone forgets that. There's easily half a dozen times where he grabs Yang Hao's shoulder and hauls him back from danger. And Huo Daofu is the one Jiumen member smart enough to get out ahead of disaster, and to take Yang Hao with him. Here he is looking fabulous in a completely unnecessary but dramatic scarf.

And, at the end, he lets Yang Hao go. Because he's secretly decent.

Sure, he has some vaguely sketchy take-over-the-Huos plans, plans that clearly go awry at some point no matter how dramatically and villainously he makes tea. Sure, he exudes a scurrilous sort of evil. But he's COMPELLING and that's all I care about. Look at his pretty little face here, sourly plotting things, in a windowpane-checked suit which should be ridiculous but just winds up looking snazzy as fuck compared to the rest of the Jiumen. This is a man who understands the value of a pocket square. Thank you so much, He Longlong, we didn't deserve you putting your entire snatch into this very minor performance but some of us are extremely grateful.

So here are seven ficrecs, with a podfic and a meta from AO3. Please let me know if I should add anything (Tumblr meta?)—this post WILL be updated, because I have too much time on my hands and care unreasonably about the mean-spirited little bastard.

‡

Remember how this used to be (3569 words) by achray Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Huo Daofu/Wu Xie (DMBJ Series) Characters: Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Wang Pangzi Additional Tags: Missing Scene, Angst, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Background Wu Xie/Zhang Qiling, Wu Xie being a gremlin, Canon-typical references to illness Summary:

“That wasn’t a no,” Wu Xie said, his smile widening. “I thought you still wanted me.”

Notes: How is this both hot and sad? I don't know, that's the magic of fanfiction. This was the first Wu Xie/Huo Daofu fic I ever read and frankly the genre needs more entries, but this is a good one.

‡

the rime dictionary of Wu Xie (7433 words) by scherzanda Chapters: 6/6 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Wu Xie/Zhang Qiling, Wang Pangzi/Ye Piaopiao, Wang Pangzi & Wu Xie & Zhang Qiling Characters: Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Wang Pangzi, Zhang Qiling, Ye Piaopiao, Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Xiao Mei, Wu Erbai, Li Jiale (DMBJ Series) Additional Tags: Piaopiao lives, Post-Canon, Canon Flashbacks, canonical illness, fun with the common cold, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Handwaved SI Recovery, Canon-typical Ershu Infodump, Quasi-History-Compliant, Yuletide Treat Summary:

This is why (even now) Wu Xie shouldn’t be let out alone—one trip out to the provinces, and he comes home with a bad cold and an unsolved mystery.

Notes: this is one of my very favorite Huo Daofu writers and here's why—read this little excerpt. The angst. The PAIN. Wu Xie absolutely broke this man's heart at some point and honestly Huo Daofu is really only himself if he's suffering, love that for him:

“Easy,” he said, when Wu Xie couldn’t seem to stop coughing. “Here—” and reached for the rest of the tea, except that it wasn’t on the table any longer.

Zhang Qiling was holding the mug; he had somehow gone around to the other side of the bed, moving in that flowing now-you-see-it-now-you-don’t way that never seemed quite human, to sit down cross-legged on the bed by Wu Xie so that their shoulders touched. Huo Daofu snatched his hand away from Wu Xie’s back as if an electrical current might flow through the double contact.

“Wu Xie,” Zhang Qiling said, and then something else so quiet it was inaudible, holding the tea so Wu Xie could drink.

Looking at the open tenderness on that remote, beautiful face, utterly focused on Wu Xie, made Huo Daofu feel as if his flesh was trying to part ways with his bones. It was a pain his medical texts didn’t have a word for, deeper and more primitive than jealousy or resentment.

Wu Xie, getting his breath back, looked sideways at him with one of those sudden grins. “Sorry, Xiao Huo. You’re still out of luck when it comes to watching me die. Maybe next time.”

Huo Daofu’s voice would not quite leave his throat. Instead, Xiao Mei said crossly “Tianzhen-shu, that’s dumb.” Most of her attention was still on her phone screen. “Why would Dr. Huo want to watch you die.”

Wu Xie looked at him, still smiling.

“It’s a long story,” said Huo Daofu, “and it doesn’t matter now.”

‡

even through hesitation (10407 words) by naiwong_bao Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV), 沙海 | Tomb of the Sea (TV), 盗墓笔记 - 南派三叔 | The Grave Robbers' Chronicles - Xu Lei Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Huo Daofu & Huo Xiuxiu, Hei Xia Zi/Huo Xiuxiu/Xie Yuchen Characters: Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Huo Xiuxiu, Yang Hao (DMBJ Series), Hei Xia Zi (DMBJ Series), Xie Yuchen, Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Wang Pangzi Additional Tags: Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Character Study, Alternate Universe - Fantasy Series: Part 3 of this is where we live Summary:

He’s a boy so Huo Daofu knows from the beginning that there are no expectations for him, he can do as he likes. So he plays, he cries, he does what children do.

Then his parents die.

No one wants him, no one has time for him, so his family sends him to Germany for school. It’ll be a good opportunity, his family says. He can do whatever he wants, be free of the family business, they’ll take care of him over there. He doesn’t want to go, he doesn't know who they are, but he doesn’t get a say.

So he goes to Germany where the language is strange, the food is strange, the people are strange, and he wants to go home so badly that his teeth ache.

Huo Daofu builds a life for himself, but at the first sign of trouble, years and years and years later, he rents out his apartment to an acquaintance, and flies home.

But.

The language is strange, he doesn’t know the slang, the food is strange, the people are strange.

His family is cold and he still doesn’t get a say. --- Huo Daofu between the end of Tomb of the Sea and when he reappears in Reboot. AKA Huo Daofu learns to care a little.

‡

The Mark of a Man (2279 words) by JhanaMay Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 沙海 | Tomb of the Sea (TV), 盗墓笔记 - 南派三叔 | The Grave Robbers' Chronicles - Xu Lei Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Huo Daofu & Yang Hao (DMBJ Series) Characters: Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Yang Hao (DMBJ Series) Additional Tags: Loneliness, Found Family even when it makes you want to scream, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Huo Daofu is a mediocre role model Series: Part 8 of The Art of Conversation, Part 7 of The Art of Conversation Side Stories Summary:

When Huo Daofu inducted Yang Hao into the Huo family business, he wasn't expecting to become the boy's de facto babysitter.

Notes: a poignant little vignette in which Huo Daofu has a heart.

‡

[META] Huo Daofu's Youtiao Stand (739 words) by Thimblerig Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 盗墓笔记 - 南派三叔 | The Grave Robbers' Chronicles - Xu Lei, 沙海 | Tomb of the Sea (TV), 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Huo Daofu & Huo Xiuxiu, Huo Daofu & Wu Xie (DMBJ Series) Characters: Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series) Additional Tags: Meta, Worldbuilding, Huo Daofu's Delicious Fried Snacks Series: Part 2 of DMBJ Meta Summary:

Huo Daofu is a supporting character in Sand Sea. Ambitious, wily, hungry, he’s far from one of the main villains of the story but he’s not nice, either. By the end of Sand Sea Huo Daofu has exploited the chaos caused by the ill-founded expedition to Gutongjing to take over various of the Huo Family operations.

When he appears in Reboot: Sound of Providence, he is a purveyor of delicious fried bread snacks. He’s clearly not hurting for money, so why…?

Notes: this is one of my favorite little HDF explorations, theorizing that Huo Xiuxiu busted him down a rank, and I think that's beautiful.

‡

starting in darkness, like a pure line of light (10167 words) by scherzanda Chapters: 5/5 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Huo Daofu/Bai Haotian, Bai Haotian & Wu Xie, Liu Sang & Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Bai Haotian & Liu Sang Characters: Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Bai Haotian, Liu Sang (DMBJ Series), Wang Pangzi, Zhang Qiling Additional Tags: background pingxie, background Iron Triangle, past Wu Xie/Huo Daofu, Post-Canon, hurt/sarcasm, Fade to Black, Dialogue Heavy, meta-adjacent, Self-Indulgent Use of Chinese, Emotional Hurt/Comfort Summary:

Some emotional loose ends are never going to be tied up, but at least they can be recognized and shared. Or, a selection of the worst best only ways to comfort one another in the aftermath.

Notes: absolutely nothing makes me, a Huo Daofu stan, happier than scherzanda's fics featuring him. You would think this is an odd pairing, but it's really not—the two people who love Wu Xie most and are left behind by him? They have so much in common. Also, this fic has a podfic!

[PODFIC] starting in darkness, like a pure line of light, by scherzanda (701 words) by Thimblerig Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV), 盗墓笔记 - 南派三叔 | The Grave Robbers' Chronicles - Xu Lei Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Huo Daofu/Bai Haotian, Bai Haotian & Wu Xie, Liu Sang & Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Bai Haotian & Liu Sang Characters: Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Huò Dàofū, Bai Haotian, Liu Sang (DMBJ Series), Wang Pangzi, Zhang Qiling Additional Tags: background pingxie, background Iron Triangle, past Wu Xie/Huo Daofu, Post-Canon, hurt/sarcasm, Fade to Black, Dialogue Heavy, Meta Adjacent, Self-Indulgent Use of Chinese, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Podfic, podficcer not a native chinese-speaker but is doing her best, Podfic Length: 1-1.5 Hours

‡

do the work, love the work (1616 words) by scherzanda Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Characters: Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Wu Xie (DMBJ Series), Wang Pangzi, Zhang Qiling, Liu Sang (DMBJ Series), Bai Haotian, Wu Erbai Additional Tags: Mid-Canon, Missing Scene, Character Study, Post-Canon, Yuletide Treat Summary:

It doesn't always look that way, but Huo Daofu is doing his best.

Notes: once again I just have to excerpt, so you'll GET IT:

The train had nearly reached Hangzhou by the time Wu Xie spoke to him beyond the commonplace. He was still sitting in the corridor, staring dreamily at the growing suburbs, while Zhang Qiling gave Wang Pangzi a hand in the cabin. He looked up as Huo Daofu came back from the hot water dispenser. “Xiao Huo, xinkule. Sorry you never got that chance to watch me die, eh?”

Huo Daofu closed his eyes and looked away from Wu Xie’s smile, unshadowed now with death, brilliant and painful. “I’m sorry too,” he said, eyes still closed, and did not say any of the things he was sorry for.

‡

not only the sugar, but the days (3000 words) by A Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 盗墓笔记重启 | The Lost Tomb Reboot (TV), 盗墓笔记 - 南派三叔 | The Grave Robbers' Chronicles - Xu Lei Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Bai Haotian/Huo Daofu Characters: Huo Daofu (DMBJ Series), Bai Haotian Additional Tags: Mentions of Death, Healing, Getting Together, Youtiao as a Metaphor, Also Actual Youtiao Summary:

His gaze meets Bai Haotian's, who's trying so hard to keep it together, and he knows that Wu Xie will break her heart when he dies, and it won't even be his fault. He never fucking means to.

Notes: another recent entry in the HDF/Bai Haotian post-canon and I love it unreasonably. They both love Wu Xie SO MUCH and it's just taking them OUT. Their subsequent connection is natural and it's funny as hell, the author loves them both and it shows:

"Are you really sure?" Bai Haotian says softly, and Huo Daofu looks up.

"What?"

"About the week."

"At best," he says, then winces. Fuck it. "It'll be three days," he says, loud enough to carry through the bedroom door, "if he keeps pulling these stunts!" There's a muffled noise and some very clear profanity from Pangzi, which Huo Daofu ignores. "See if I care!" he adds, but it's just not the same without Wu Xie there to grin at him, unrepentant.

He can feel Bai Haotian's hand covering his own, just loosely, where it's half curled into a fist against his thigh. He turns his head. The look she gives him is so full of unquestioning kindness, of understanding, he almost has to close his eyes against it.

"I'm sure," he says quietly, not really looking at her. "But he's proven me wrong before."

He can see her nod as she takes that in, and then they just sit there in silence, her hand over his, not moving.

‡

In conclusion, just because I can, from some of my favorite posts:

[ohyka]

[jeong-guwon]

[januaryisnotanartist]

Please also do not fail to check out the magnificent Dr Mal Practice post, as well as "it's not his fucking birthday" and "I'll fucking do it but christ alive." These users truly understand the essence of Huo Daofu.

PS also don't sleep on Huo Daofu and Liu Sang having a fabulous bitch-off in Hua Mei, a Sha Hai side story ft. haunted Wushanju. Another side story, Ran Gu, also has a swooning Kan Jian. Quality entertainment!

[c-art00nish]

Oh no Kai died!

So. I saw a post here on tumblr (I didn't save it :c) saying "what if kai died trying to provide for nya and she took his place in the series" and smth took over me and I drew this

More info below

So I took the premise of him dying and Nya taking his place but that's it, bc the og post said Nya would inherit his elemental power, but since Morro kept his being dead I'd imagine Kai could too.

So this changes a lot of stuff, in this au Kai "discovers" his elemtal powers early on, but they just manifest as being inmune to burns and fire which helps since this kid works at a forge.

One day he goes deep in the town to buy food, but there is an accident and a house is set on fire, he was just about to go home and ignore all the chaos when he hear someone still inside, against his better judgement he went in and helped knowing his resistance to fire. He saves the person trapped inside.. but instead of a 'thanks' the whole townspeople just go 'A witch!' since he didn't suffer any burns.. And you can imagine what happens next

Either way Kai does not arrive home, when Nya goes to town to ask where he is she is told he ran away by lady and that she should leave aswell (Quick tangent. The lady told Nya that to avoid explaining that they basically unalived her brother and so Nya doesn't get the same fate)

She moves away and years down the line she meets a nice old man saying he is looking for something special.

Okay so here goes the timeline from Nya's side all up until season 5:

• Pilot:

She works in a small shop doing repairs and is very agrressive towards Wu since instead of asking where are her parents he asked if she had any siblings, so yeah open wound. Anyway there is no kidnapping motivator here, the skeletons steal the map and destroy the only home she had, she goes with Wu in order to get revenge. He sees she is lost and in need of family so he trains her, everything goes about the same, Jay's line changes to inmediatly be "Do you like blue?", and she proceeds to ignore him since letting people in her life hasn't been an option in a long time (also here Wu assumed she must have the fire element). They get the weapons and Garmadon still tricks Nya with Kai's voice, when she arrives she is so mad she attempts to lift the sword to attack Garmadon, but she can't, seeing she has no use to him he sends some skeletons to attack, but apparently out of nowhere the sword lifts itself up and lands in Nya's hands (she was fighting the skeletons at that). From there Wu arrives, leaves, Garmadon is free all that stuff.

Nya wants to leave since she feels she failed since she is not the master of fire, but everyone just doesn't care and want her to still be part of the family. And so we go on to rise of the serpentine

• Rise of the Snakes:

Okay so here everything goes about the same, Samurai X is still Nya but it isn't a secret (she does this bc still feels like she can't be a ninja). Jay's true potencial happens bc he is like "I can't show you who I am becaussse you're ssso cool! I mean you are Sssamurai X and a Ninja!" which to she responds that she likes him as he is and even if she didn't he shouldn't change for others.

And the fangblades stuff is bc if Nya can't be tha master of fire, and samurai x isn't a ninja (she wants to but feels useless without an element) she might as well be the green one right?

She still saves Loyd over the fangblade, creating a dome of water from seemingly nowhere, unlocking her true potential as the master of water. And everything carries on the same

• Legacy of the Green Ninja & Rebooted:

Everything is pretty much the same.

Nya loses another brother

• Tournament of Elements:

All the ninja are split up like in the series with Nya doing vigilante stuff instead of fighting in an illegal fight club. Loyd attemps to reunite his family and everything goes about the same.

Skylor and Nya definetly flirted much to Jay's dissmay

Nya "betrays" Loyd just like Kai did with Nya in the series except Garmadon is left alone with the snake pet and Loyd is taken to the ritual. When Nya lifts the staff she does go a little power crazy, not for wanting to be the green ninja but bc she wants this power to protect her family.

Anyways season ends. RIP Garmadon

• Possesion:

All goes the same for the first 5 minutes. Then after fighting a possesed Loyd a ghost with fire in his hands arrives to the Bounty, asking- no, begging, for the Ninja to help him

Nya recognizes him and the world stops

Gonna do the Kai timeline in other post with Morro art :)

[fallenangels1987]

lets face it. the joker sucks as a batman villain. everybody thinks hes good because hes got a cool character design and hes been around since forever and writers keep trying to make him good, but in concept alone he fails to tap into any of the central themes or intrigue of batman, and nor does he reflect any of bruces internal conflict. really, the only use the joker has ever had was creating harley quinn, but now shes an entirely separate character from him so any short-lived relevance he may have had with her is gone. but contrary to what some may think, i dont think the joker should die. that decision would be a big deal and he'd be so dramatic about it, we'd have an entire plotline dedicated to it.... no one wants that. no one wants to see his stupid joker face for longer than physically necessary. it would also be reversed by the next reboot. no, we need a plan to make him irrelevant. more so than he already is, i mean.

first, we have batmans rogues gallery do a drag race. whos judging? poison ivy and the riddler. its green-themed. but see this is genius. cuz who hates the joker more than poison ivy and the riddler? yeah, harley quinn, who is not in attendance cuz she knows whats about to happen. in fact, she planned this, and shes using this as her cover to mess around with selina and try to convince her to be harley and pams third again. it wont work, but the dedication and jakey-haterism is commendable.

the drag race itself is not the focus, however. see, the entire thing has been set up to generate the most drama possible. everyone except for the joker has received invitations that say the show (which is being live broadcast to an unwilling audience of 150,000, all of whom thought they were watching the morning news up until 5 minutes ago, and found themselves unable to switch the broadcast off) will be recording their every move, so they better be on their worst behavior. the joker, unbeknownst to this, is being his usual asshole self, but not even in a fun conniving way, just in the regular asshole way.

at some point, he starts a fight. tensions are already high and hes the fucking joker. just let him dig his own grave here. he starts a fight and his (already shitty, i should add) outfit gets torn. now he has to spend all of his time that should be spent on makeup on fixing the stitching of this dress, and its going awful, and hes been forcibly removed from the makeup/costume making zone so hes just sitting on the stoop outside with a single spool of thread trying to fix this poofy ass dress. soon enough hes got 5 minutes left on the clock and hes still not finished, so hes like fuck it! im just gonna do my makeup and hope for the best. the makeup is atrocious, predictably, he doesnt even get to finish the eyeliner, but he tries to go back inside nonetheless. oops, he got locked out! thank you, tetch. now hes gotta go through the front, all the while trying not to get dirt on this dress which is falling apart on top of him, knowing full well poison ivy and the riddler and the rest of the queens are making fun of him for being late.

he gets back in. by this point, hes sweating like a damn hog, his makeup is running, but hes HERE. he sees amygdala preparing to go down the runway. no no no, the JOKER cant have that. the joker cant have anyone stealing his rightfully earned spotlight. he pushes amygdala out of the way and waits for the go-ahead.

poison ivy and the riddler look confused and disturbed, then whisper to one another for a moment. they turn back toward him.

"didnt we already escort you off the premises like, half an hour ago?" the riddler asks.

"yeah, you weren't supposed to come back," poison ivy says. "that's the point of having henchmen take you out."

they argue about this for a while until joker is thrown out again. the public vote gives him a pitiful 1%.

after that, hes a laughing stock! nobody likes him! hes just the guy who couldnt take a hint even after he was kicked out of a building! he resigns in disgrace and moves to rural ohio where he becomes a gas station attendant. and THAT is how we get rid of the joker.

[cephalog0d]

Okay, but like. There's the whole joke about Bruce recruiting children to be his sidekicks, but honestly there's only really one that fits that.

And it's Jason. And the whole story there is, frankly, unhinged. Aaaaand then he died.

(I'm specifically talking about "first post-crisis origin stories" here because Jason and Dick, in particular, have both had multiple major retcons and revisions over the years, and some of them dramatically change how things happened.)

Like okay. Going backwards, you've got Duke who joined/led a whole Robin-based gang at a time when Bruce wasn't even Batman. You've got Damian and Cass, who were both literally born into the world of masks and capes and heroes and villains, so they weren't ever really not going to be part of it. Steph might have taken inspiration from previous heroes but she made her own identity and repeatedly refused to stop involving herself in the vigilante lifestyle. Tim, obviously, basically strong-armed Batman into letting him be Robin, despite Batman's protests.

Dick's a little more complicated just because there's so many versions, because that's what 80 years of comics and multiple universe reboots will do, and there's kind of a general trend that earlier pre-crisis versions were more of Batman being like "hello, child, would you like to be my sidekick" and later versions have leaned harder and harder into the idea that Dick was absolutely going to do this anyway, regardless of what Batman had to say about it. But even in the first post-crisis version, the flashback in Batman Year 3, Dick says he wants to find a way to keep people like that from hurting others again. When Alfred questions Bruce's offer to train him, Bruce says that Dick should learn to do things the right way if he's going to do it. It's not hard to extrapolate that, much like later versions of the origin story, Dick was going to get himself into this one way or another. (Batman (1940) #437)

And then there's Jason. Whose backstory has also had a lot of (sometimes major) revisions over the years (remember when his adoption was, like, some kind of Joker-originated long con? Fucken Nu52, man). But the original post-crisis version is pretty straightforward. Steals Batman's tires, gets caught and sent to Ma Gunn's Secret Criminal School, intervenes when Batman goes to investigate, immediately gets offered the chance to be Robin based entirely on that.

Which is itself kind of unhinged. That Bruce saw this kid who was living on his own stealing tires and went "Hey you would make a good Robin" as his very first instinct.

But if you've never read Jason's post-crisis origin, or it's been a while, it's honestly even more unhinged than that because that arc starts with Dick getting "fired" as Robin specifically for the reason that he got shot by Joker and Bruce freaked out about how the Robin identity has too many enemies and therefore Dick, a legal adult with approximately a decade of training and experience, should not use the identity anymore.

(And it's specifically about the Robin identity, in this version, because when Dick says he's not going to stop the crime fighting thing Bruce's response is basically "I know and I didn't expect you to". Honestly I could also say a lot about this version of the Robin/Nightwing transition vs. later ones and how this one definitely feels like the Heavy Hand of DC Editorial in the fact that they had no contact for so long afterwards, because the interaction really doesn't feel like it warrants that in this case compared to some later versions, but that's a whole other too-long ramble.) (Batman (1940) #408)

And then a few weeks later Bruce turns around and picks up a random kid, a literal child, and goes "Hey you would make a good Robin!"

And I think a lot about how fucking wild that is. And it's not like the people writing just didn't notice. Dick's big argument with Bruce when he finally comes back to Gotham and meets Jason isn't about the fact that Bruce took in another kid, or even necessarily about Dick feeling proprietary over the Robin identity, the thing he's angry about is that Bruce said it was too dangerous for him, an adult, someone who has trained with Batman for a decade and was already highly physically trained before that for his whole life, to be Robin, and now Bruce has turned around and painted that target onto some random new kid. He pushes, repeatedly, trying to get Bruce to justify himself and this absolutely irresponsible decision, and Bruce gives a lot of answers about how Jason was on a bad path and needed this outlet and eventually just admits that he missed having a partner. (Batman (1940) #416)

And like. Dick's right, is the thing. He is 1000% in the right in this argument. If he can't be Robin anymore because of the danger, how in the hell is it anything like a good idea to hand it over to someone way younger, way less trained, way less experienced, and expect that that wouldn't end in tragedy?

And then it did.

And yeah, Bruce, it is kinda a lot of your fault.

[winxwannabe]

Thoughts on/Rating the S9 images that will probably be wrong in 3 months LETS GO -

Tecna is the best. Hands down, 10/10. I don’t care if they threw it together at the last minute to avoid backlash, give whoever designed her a goddamn raise. The bob with purple streaks, the vinyl skirt, it’s so perfect I can’t handle it. Me to Reboot Tecna:

Please let that be real. Please let the metal arm stay, Straffi.

My girl Musa is an official SHORT QUEEN, a popular headcannon that’s been going for years. I’m thrilled someone finally listened. Her iconic pigtails are also back, which is a bonus is my book (do they kinda look like Marinette’s from Miraculous? Yes, because Rainbow’s gotta steal one thing per season for Winx). The outfit isn’t my favorite, but better than others I’ve seen her in. A very respectable 8.5/10.

Rainbow’s art department raised enough money for brown paint, which is great news for Aisha! No more whitewashing! Her braids are stellar, her look is sporty, just very cute in general. The color scheme is very different from her original look, but I like it. Give Aisha bright colors. Let her be happy. And now tallest girl? 9/10

Flora’s look is the most similar to the OG series. Really the only difference is that weird ass green jacket - thing looks like it came off a one-day Project Runway challenge. It seems waaaay too structured compared to the rest of the outfit. That’s legit my only note. If it ain’t broke don’t fix it, I guess. 7.5/10

Bloom’s look says 2 things; “I’m Bella Thorne from Shake It Up!,” and Certified Horse Girl™️. I do not vibe with either. Bloom is not either. Why is she in pink again? Why is her belt so big - Bloom is so impatient and always in a rush, do you think she has time to put a belt on every day? I get the skirt is paying homage to the S3 one, but the rest is…a choice. This would be lower if Bloom wasn’t my favorite character. But she is, and it’s not the worst look. 6/10.

No, no, the worst look here is your favorite Solarian princess and mine, Stella. I get Rainbow was trying for a new look, but it doesn’t land for me. I don’t like the sunglasses, I don’t like that her dress is pink because that’s never really been Stella’s primary color - it’s more Flora and Tecna’s (and now Bloom’s I guess because UGH). She’s also wearing sleeves, which Stella rarely wore in the series because she is the fairy of the sun and I always thought that was a cool wardrobe detail. The only times she’s worn long sleeves (as a primary outfit in the season) were in S6 with her Alfea uniform, and Season 8, which barely counts. Just…make it orange. Or yellow, or even blue. It would fix so much. 5/10 for doing this ray of sunshine so dirty.

Also, if we can afford new civilian and transformation outfits for the girls, we can do the same for Ogron and the Black Circle. C’mon guys. Also! Why does Ogron have a dark dragon? What the fuck does that mean? Please do not pull a S8 Valtor on the Wizards. They don’t deserve it. And probably get Duman in there before the fans come after you.

[happylittleshrub]

Rocket Plushie Review

My thoughts on Rocket plushies! I only own some of these so for those I'll go into a little more detail, but most of this is just based on vibes lol

This isn't in any sort of ranking or order

I love this one! His fur feels so soft and he sits on my desk and keeps me company. Reminds me of Pokemon's "Sitting Cuties" line of plushes. Sometimes he'll fall over a little but that's really only if he's sitting on a more uneven surface like a bed or sofa, on my desk he sits fine

This one looks like one of those Littlest Pet Shop toys. So many of the other Rocket plushies look good I don't know what happened here.

Sweet, sleepy boy I love to cuddle him ❤️ Both huggable and snuggable. My sleep has improved 120% since getting him 10/10 would recommend

This is my son my precious little child I love him I want the world for him he is the greatest thing in all of existence. He is so very soft and the perfect size to hug and to hold. ❤️

This is the first Rocket plush I ever got he is very special to me 🥹 I like the chibified design, very adorable! He does have a hard time sitting up on his own because of his disproportionately sized head, I usually have to lean him against something. His ears are velvety soft!

Tiny gremlin, an actual creature. He is full of bad ideas. I like that he comes with a tiny gun

This one looks kind of like a dog more so than a raccoon. Maybe it's just this picture. Idk he still cute tho

This one is good but something about his eyes feels a little off. I don't know if I trust him

Absolutely adorable! He has Animal Crossing vibes. I would buy him but he's over forty dollars 🙃

This one is cute but uh... this is legally distinct off-brand Rocket Wolf not Rocket Raccoon

He is 100% friend shaped I love him I want to give him a hug

"I can't believe I'm taking orders from a hamster." -Some Nova Corps Guy. I like this little dude, he's smol and squishy like a marshmallow!

This one is cute, but I do kinda wish his face wasn't so flat, otherwise no notes

This is so adorable wth you can carry Rocket around on your back like he's a sleepy little child I love it

Bro's lookin' like a finger puppet. He's very small and cute!

This Rocket looks like he needs some love. Well, that's all Rockets but especially this one. Looks like he'd be standing alone a street corner somewhere. Someone needs to bring him home and make him soup

I feel like this one should be the reference image next to the word Blorbo in a dictionary. This is the embodiment of blorbo and all other blorbos should bow to him

Shadow the Hedgehog wannabe. Gritty 90s reboot edgelord

This Rocket is smiling but I feel like he's screaming on the inside while this rando pulls on his ears

Football Head here stares into my soul. He can and will beat me up

Cute but not the best. I'd probably put him in a B-Tier (Shrub, you said you weren't going to do rankings!)

Adorable little guy! He has tiny magnets in his hands with which to hold batteries and other stolen items. You can also buy little outfits for these types of plushies so 20/10! During the colder months I let him ride around in my hoodie ^-^

This one is up to no good I love the mischief in his expression lol

I love Disney Tsum Tsum so this little peanut is an absolute winner in my book

"Until a second ago I thought you were a build-a-bear."

"MAYBE I AM"

He's so sweet and adorable would absolutely bring him home and love him forever (would be even better if he came with sound like some build-a-bears do)

WHO PUT HIM IN THE DRYER???

The way they did his eyes reminds me of Spiderman

He's a sweet boy he just needs someone looking out for him and to be his conscience and stop him from stealing batteries 💛

FERAL

Bro's got them sparkly anime eyes. Also sideburns

Alright I've reached the photo limit so that's all for now. If you read all the way down here thanks for checking out my silly ramblings!

[doueverwonder]

Massachusetts: Well, it's obvious what has to be done.

Rhode Island: Set UPS on fire.

Massachusetts: no.

Rhode Island: Set the neighbors on fire.

Connecticut: Rhode, we don't let you do fire anymore, remember?

Rhode Island: I know. But still, the flame, she calls to me.

Massachusetts: We have to have a revolutionary war reboot!

Rhode Island: I love a reboot.

Massachusetts: Rebels vs. Red Coats. Stealing that package off my porch was as bad as the Boston Massacre!

Connecticut: Worse!

Virginia, sounding tired: Y'all said the same thing about cinnamon gum.

Connecticut: It's too hot.

Massachusetts: Gum is meant to be minty and refreshing.

Massachusetts: It's on! Hamp, go to the attic get those leftover roman candles, we're gonna need ammo.

New Hampshire: Roger that.

Rhode Island: The fireworks have been in the attic the whole time? There's so many times I wanted to use them!

Everyone: We don't let you do fire anymore!

Massachusetts: Let's go men, we got a war to win!

[thatlightbluefox]

Can we see more of Boomer and Buttercup’s friendship and how Brick, Blossom, Bubbles, and Butch react to them being in a band? Are they also members of it or are people like Mitch a part of it because he’s friends with Buttercup or is it just Buttercup and Boomer?

(it was after Boomer discovered he had free will away from being yelled at by Brick that this began)

The band is mostly made up of Buttercup’s friend group + Boomer (if I actually choose to expand on this AU I might draw the whole bad together for sillies) but it was just them two when they were originally figuring out what they were gonna do

There’s not a lot on their friendship, but I like to imagine them getting along over music! One of the comics has the RRB crashing a concert the girls were attending, with Boomer playing a guitar, and an episode of the PPG had buttercup and her sisters playing as a band with Buttercup being one of the guitarists (if I’m allowed to mention the reboot a few times- yes, I watched the reboot and I will go down using some things for HC’s and forget everything else-) Buttercup also had a strong interest in bands and wanting to be like a popular guitarist she looked up to. It just made sense for her to want a band!

In all honesty they only started a band after finding out an artist they liked was a terrible person and decided that if someone couldn’t make music without being shitty they would just do it themselves (mostly Buttercup’s mindset, Boomer had the idea to just steal music styles of random artists)

their relationship was rocky at first with them being at each other’s throats about little things, but eventually they worked it out when the band thing came along. (The power of wanting a band saved them, but they still annoy each other)

Bloss was likely hesitant at first about letting her sister start a band with a well known villain that’s tried killing them multiple times (I mean, how are they sure he wouldn’t pull a fast one on them?) meanwhile Bubbles was just excited to hear about this band thing and seeing Boomer become friendly with them.

Unlike the Puffs being at least a bit open to the idea, Brick and Butch were absolutely heated when they found out (Boomer tried hiding it so many times) but after failing at convincing Boomer to make it a plot for a surprise ambush against the girls they ignored it. Boomer tried to at least get them to check out his skills every once in a while but just kept getting disinterested responses by both Brick and Butch every time. Eventually Brick came around when he was slowly relaxing about the whole mortal enemies thing (before his own frienemy-ship with the girls), but the best he got from Brick was him standing near his room to listen before walking away (there’s a few times Brick would genuinely give Boomer advice on things about having a band. It was very rare but Boomer appreciated it)

Soon enough though Blossom, Bubbles, and Brick started coming to hear them play during their band practice. Butch… not so much.

((Bonus: the Girls were more open about Boomer since they still saw him as the harmless one, Boomer and Buttercup have a combination Pop-rock as their music genre))

Edit: I forgot tags lol

[sara-scribbles]

headcanon/scenario for malleus leona idia sebek when their so give them a surprise kiss before running away laughing pls?

Surprise kiss headcanons - Leona, Idia, Malleus, Sebek

Leona

Giving him a surprise kiss isn't even that hard considering he naps so much and you can just sneak one in during that time

Leona likes getting kisses, though he might not fully say it aloud. Having you suddenly kiss him out of the blue makes him perk up

Is he smiling? No of course not! It's a smirk because he's so amused at your antics. Or so he claims

Now whether you actually get away depends on how Leona is feeling at that moment. With his beastman reflexes, he can easily grab on to you if he so wishes

However if he's feeling lazy, he'll let you run off but will get back to you eventually. Though your sudden kiss does put him in a good mood, and maybe he'll have a better nap

When he's actually awake, he'll pull you down before you can blink and trap you in his arms. Be prepared to spend time as his personal body pillow though it's not an uncommon occurrence with Leona of all people

Idia

Lets be honest, any surprise kiss or show of affection causes Idia to short circuit. Stands there like a statue for 1, 2, 3 maybe 5 seconds

Once his brain has fully come back online, he'll usually let out a squeak of surprise and possibly his hair turns a nice shade of pink

No matter how long you've been in a relationship with Idia, your sudden surprise affections never fail to shock him. Rebooting needed every time

Ortho thinks it's cute so little brother approved!

Idia isn't the type to run after you cause he's too embarrassed. However later in the day when it's just the two of you, he might make a comment

And if he's feeling super confident, he might just give you a surprise kiss back though expect on the cheek or forehead most often

Malleus

He enjoys your surprise kisses and looks forward to them. Though, he likes any affection you show him, big or small

Your surprise kiss takes him a second to realize what happened before he reacts, which by then you're probably running off somewhere, your laughter trailing behind

Insert sad, pouty dragon because he can't return the action right away though he'll always follow after you

He's a big cheat and will use his teleportation magic to get to you. Malleus doesn't see it as cheating because all he wants is to kiss you back!

Will look very smug when he appears in front of you. May tease you for trying to run away from a dragon after stealing a kiss. And haven't you learned he can teleport quicker than you can run?

Wants another reward for catching you. He's very greedy indeed

Sebek

WH-WHAT?!?!

There's a very red-faced crocodile shouting somewhere, loud enough to wake up the dead

Sebek is left a sputtering mess, and it's kind of funny how this happens every single time. Lilia finds Sebek's reaction very entertaining. Ah, to be young and in love!

He's too flustered to go after you most times, but he'll be thinking about it all day and randomly becomes a flustered mess

When Sebek does go after you, he's shouting your name in every hallway and stairwell you run through. Students make way for the green haired first year least they get trampled. Please let him catch you, everyone's eardrums will thank you

Grudgingly gives you a kiss when no one's around while muttering about how much trouble you are for taking him away from the young master. But inwardly he's preening like a peacock, which shows with the way his frown twitches ever upwards

[sketch-shepherd-art]

Alright so I’ve finally finished all of Make Your Mark on Netflix (I have no interest in Tell Your Tale) and, well… I certainly have thoughts. Unfortunately I felt MLP G5 (even including A New Generation) was pretty weak. I don't HATE G5 of course, but it certainly has problems. Not counting the ton of continuity errors and plot holes and retcons from G4, most of the episodes + specials on their own I found flat and boring.

And yes I KNOW that G5 deserves to be its own thing and shouldn’t rely 100% on G4’s popularity but come on… a sequel series still needs SOME connection to its predecessor, and G5 has so little of it?? And the worst part is that the super sparse FIM references were for legal reasons, which makes me even wonder why bother setting it in the same universe as G4 instead of just making a complete reboot. And yes I’ve heard that the G5 comics actually go deeper into the lore, but important worldbuilding details should be included in the show proper, not in supplemental materials. 

So yeah, that only inspired me to make even more changes for my MLP next gen AU. Starting with a bunch of different ideas I have for Opaline. More details about my revamped design and backstory for her under the cut

First off, her canon design is way too gaudy and takes away a lot of her intended scare factor, so I redesigned her with multiple variants. For all versions I removed her blue eyeshadow and the braids around her ears (too ridiculous-looking and difficult for me to draw), and made her hair a bit more asymmetrical. 

As for my version of her backstory, rather than Opaline being over a thousand years old and having known Celestia and Luna when they were fillies, I made Opaline a former student of Twilight who became her successor as the next Alicorn Princess. Only Opaline didn't do a great job as a ruler which caused Twilight to drain her of her magic and banish her to the outskirts of Equestria.

But after Twilight died of old age (don't ask me why Twilight didn't find a new successor, still working that out) the magic shield locking Opaline outside Equestria faded and allowed her back in. So she was the one who caused disharmony between ponies all over again (yeah kind of a repeat of the Nightmare Moon situation but), and additionally kidnapped Misty as a filly to use her as a spy and do tasks to help Opaline get her powers back, including her wanting to steal dragon fire to become a fire Alicorn like in canon.

Made this change for two reasons 1) the whole “ancient villain who knew Celestia and Luna back in the day escaped now and is planning to wreak havoc on modern Equestria” has been done a hundred times already in FIM, let a new villain form literally during Twilight’s reign 2) it would keep the rejection aspect of Opaline's canon backstory but give her more personal beef with Twilight which is why Opaline targets her

so my AU wouldn't just have all ponies restore unity and then have Opaline just come as a threat right after like A New Generation + Make Your Mark did. Achieving harmony between pony AND non-pony kind would be done over the course of a series and not just one movie, with Equestria being restored + Misty being freed after Opaline's defeat. The Unity Crystals still play a role in my AU, with Twilight having created them as a new alternative to the Elements of Harmony rather than just a macguffin to stop Opaline specifically.

Also if it were up to me I like my #3 redesign the best, the blue hues would probably fit the best for a fire-based villain (fire being blue when it's hottest and all) but that depends on if/when I wanna draw my AU Opaline in the future

[be-the-glenn-to-my-maggie]

I've had this thought for a while that Neteyam was like, a justice warrior as a child. He's always taking the blame for Lo'ak and he's so up in his siblings business at all times. I think that would've manifested as much much more annoying when he was a child. I think Neteyam could totally be a little shit in his relentless quest to do what's right. Here is what I mean:

-The first time it happened, Jake was scolding Kiri for wandering off after a bug when his back was turned, causing him to have a full like two minutes of panic where he thought he'd have to tell Neytiri he lost a child. She was located fairly quickly after, but Jake was full of terrified parental adrenaline and insisted to little Kiri rather forcefully that she never do that again. Neteyam, who had been helping him look, then said "It wasn't her fault, don't yell at her." To which Jake (who really wasn't yelling) found himself trying to genuinely reason with two toddlers that the rules were in place for their safety. When Neteyam understands the purpose for the rule, he backs off and respects it. This remains true; once he gets it he follows it.

-Neteyam's insistence for justice knows no bounds. One time Jake saw Spider hit Lo'ak in the head with a spoon and instituted Spider's personal 'table-Lo'ak-can't-climb-up-on' time out all the while ignoring Neteyam's outraged arguing that he was being completely unfair because Jake was directly ignoring that Lo'ak had tripped Spider before the spoon incident and Jake was always playing favorites. Jake had not SEEN the tripping, and it didn't excuse the spoon thing.

-It's literally so hard not to argue with Neteyam sometimes. Neytiri is better at it because she had more experience with kids than Jake, but even she falls victim to it sometimes. He just literally refuses to mind his own business in all situations. That and 'worry about your own self' are human phrases that have become almost more common than any Na'vi one in their house. "Sempu, Kiri is trying to sneak a piece of fruit after you told her not to-" "Neteyam, mind your own business." "But you said she can't have any yet!"

-One time Spider told Lo'ak that he could borrow his datapad that Norm gave him for his lessons. Lo'ak insisted Spider said he could have it forever. No one was quite sure exactly what the truth was, but all hell broke loose when Spider took it back, causing Lo'ak (and Justice Warrior Neteyam) to insist he stole it. Jake told Lo'ak to leave it, as Spider can't steal what he owns, obviously. Cue Neteyam being ten times more outraged on Lo'ak's behalf than Lo'ak even was. This time when Jake tells him to mind his own business Neteyam says "well, you aren't!" Jake struggles, he reboots, and when he's back online he says to his eight year old son, "I didn't think I had to explain what was different between me and you here."

-Regularly Neteyam is not involved in a situation but will get put in a time out as well because he wouldn't let it go. Sometimes though, he can be talked down. If you get on his level and explain the rules and why someone is in trouble clearly, he's usually chill.