#life thots

[jessica-tobedetermined]

I have wayy too nice of a butt to be single

[starjunkyard]

Obsessed with the degrees to which james wilson is a messy bitch. Primps and preens himself whenever he realises his boy best friend is stalking / sabotaging / psychological-warfare-ing him. Slept with his terminal patient. Immedicable people pleaser. Chronic adulterer. Three ex wives. PROPOSED TO HIS GIRLFRIEND AT SOMEONE ELSE'S WEDDING? Fuck you doin in the oncology wing my boy. Psychiatric ward is on the left corner

[pink-andwhite]

ethan landry mocking you >>>

"oh it's too big baby? that's so cute." then proceeds to fuck you harder, making sure to shove that extra inch in there each thrust.

"too much? oh you poor thing.." wraps his hand around your throat and fucks you faster, definitely rubs your clit too.

"you're all done sweetie? that's too bad, im just getting started." proceeds to fuck you through 4 more orgasms.

[fcthots]

Can I request 27. "I'm going to carry you, okay?" with an angsty dash of 5. "You don't have anything to be sorry for." please?

You shouldn't have been out.

You should have never left your apartment, especially not in the middle of the night, especially when Jason didn't know you left, but you just wanted to go on a short walk, but one wrong turn turned your short walk into a very long one.

You could hear a few things: the beating of your heart, the sound of your feet hitting the ground as you ran, the sound of their feet running after you, shouting from behind you.

"Get your ass back here or I swear to God, we're gonna fucking kill you!"

Fuck. You just had to go on a walk to clear your head. You just had to get lost. You just had to forget your phone. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

You were running so hard you could barely breathe. You were faster than them, but not by much, and you couldn't keep it up. You were terrified, shaking, slightly crying. You tried screaming, but no one came. You were lost, alone, scared, and being chased. You wished more than anything that you never left your apartment. You wished you just called Jason to calm down, but you didn’t want to bother him. Regret. Regret. Regret.

You've basically run in one big circle, trying to get anywhere near your apartment, but you were so lost. That street sign, though was familiar, but more than that you had passed it before; something else.

Oh.

Oh no.

You knew the name on that street sign because Jason was telling you about it earlier

...in reference to a trafficking case.

Your heart sank. Their footfalls match the erratic beating of your heart. You were tired. You couldn't keep this up forever and they knew the territory. It seemed you were at every disadvantage.

You turned a corner. You had this one chance to lose them. You use all of your remaining energy to run into the gap between the closed down corner store and apartment complex,

and promptly trip on the uneven concrete. Yeah, you pulled something.

And with your absolutely stellar luck, you picked the one alley that was a dead end.

"Fucking finally. Nowhere to run now. I think we should take our time with this one. She made us waste all that time chasing her, what's a little more?"

You open your mouth to beg for your life, but the words won't come out. You try to get up but you collapse again. You use your good leg to move yourself against the wall.

The three men laugh as they slowly approach you, taunting you. They smile and joke at the tears you didn’t notice were falling. You try to think of any possible escape route, but come up empty. One pulls out a gun and you try not to look at it.

"You really thought you could just run away, huh?"

"You can scream as loud as you want. No one is coming."

The third man laughs. "Don't say that. The screaming is fucking annoying."

They get closer to you and you feel the sweat trickle from your hairline.

Everyone's heads turn when there's a loud thud outside the alley.

You aren't exactly focused on it, but it makes them temporarily stop, so you're thankful for it.

"Marcus, go check it out."

"Fuck you. Why do I have to it?"

"Be louder, why don’t you? Quit being a bitch and go."

'Marcus' leaves with a string of curses. The attention is turned back to you again, with impatient smiles and twisted laughter, but not for long.

They make it about two more steps before Marcus yells and there's a crunch and thud.

The two men stop dead in their tracks. Communicating as if with eye contact, one nods, and the other begins to walk slowly along the wall of the alley with his gun raised until he turns the corner. While the first man tries to split his attention between you and his friend, his friend screams.

The last man turns towards you. He rushes forward in an attempt to grab your arm, presumably to drag you, but he never gets that chance.

There is a loud thunk to the back of the man's head before he's on the floor. You look up and see a red helmet.

You don’t think you've ever been happier to see that shiny red.

"Hey, it's ok. It's just me. I wasn't gonna let anything happen to you, I promise. You're safe now."

You try to say his name as he rushes over to you but it comes out as more of a pathetic and terrified whimper.

"Are you hurt?"

You nod your head and watch him freeze.

"Where?"

You drag your leg out from underneath you. He sighs in relief. His shoulders hunch forward, his forehead knocking against yours. He lands a helmet kiss there.

"C'mon. Let's get you home. I'm going to carry you, okay?"

Before you could even think about attempting to reply, he has you scooped up in his arms. He takes a deep breath in and out and locks eyes with you.

"You ok?"

"no fatal injuries"

He hums in acknowledgement. The walk is quiet. Too quiet. You don’t remember most of the walk. The adrenaline wearing off was making you tired, but Jason's silence concerned you. You shouldn't have gone out alone, it was dumb, but you couldn't handle a fight with Jason right now. That's probably why he was being quiet, he’s mad at you, but knows you don’t wanna fight. He was being so sweet, but to be honest all you wanted was comfort. You can't take him being distant right now.

Fuck it. You can't take it anymore.

"I'm sorry."

He stops on the outside of you apartment complex's elevator, moving to look at you.

You open your mouth to speak again but he cuts you off. "You don't have anything to be sorry for."

"Aren't you mad?"

"I could never be mad at you."

"But you're being all silent."

"I thought you'd want space. Do you not?"

"...no... I want comfort..."

"Alright. And I'm not mad at you. Never mad at you. That wasn't your fault, ok? I was brooding just now because I was scared at the thought of losing you. I love you. So much."

"I love you too."

[becca-e-barnes]

Honestly, it might not be everyone's thing but the thought of sweet, domestic free use makes me purr 😵‍💫

Just the thought of baking in the kitchen with some quiet music playing that you can't really hear when the mixer is running. Wearing a cute little dress with an apron on top, knowing that your husband has been enjoying the way the hem flutters just above your knees.

Bucky's always been full of compliments but never more so that when you're making him his favourite sweet treats. He appreciates you. All of you.

"Such a good little wife for me." He's been sitting at the kitchen table, waiting for your mixer to finish incorporating the dry ingredients into your chocolate brownie batter.

With your back to him, he can't see the smile that tugs at the corners of your lips. He can't see the joy you feel at being able to show him how much you love him.

"You're so gorgeous, do you know that?" He's already crossed the space between you, standing behind you and trailing his lips up your neck.

His hands feel huge on your waist and you feel how desperate you are to melt against his broader frame. You're safe and loved and appreciated and it makes you want all of him.

"I think you'll like the panties I'm wearing." You whisper, trying not to look at him as the kisses to your neck pause.

One hand slips from your waist, under the hem of your dress, trailing up the outside of your thighs.

He doesn't know whether to expect lace or cotton or silk or something else entirely but his breath catches in his throat when he finds nothing. No fabric at all. Just more soft, warm skin.

"Fuck sweetheart, you've been at home all day with no panties on?" The hand disappears and you hear your husband undo his belt buckle.

"No, I took them off before you got back." Somehow he likes that answer more. They came off just for him.

"You must've been hoping I'd take care of you." He gives his stiffening cock a few strokes before pulling your dress up and bending you over slightly.

His tip has no trouble slipping inside you, followed quickly by the rest of his length. You're almost embarrassingly wet just from knowing that he was looking at you.

"Just you keep doing what you're doing. Don't let me distract you." He groans as he thrusts into you, enjoying the tight, wet heat of your body and the way you try to turn your attention back to your mixing bowl.

[msgexymunson]

This praise kink is getting out of control.

I had my wisdom tooth removed. Long story short, it shattered when I was chewing gum, so the next day I got the rest removed.

The dentist was OK. I mean, he seemed nice; big smile, clean cut, fresh faced. But the WORDS.

"Just breathe for me."

"That's it, doing such a good job."

"That's so good, you're so brave."

"Look at you, doing so well."

"I know that's uncomfortable, I'll be as quick as I can. I know you can feel me in your mouth right here." 🫣

"Good girl." 🫠

"Look at that, so good for me, well done for taking it so well."

He asked if I was OK to leave but the blood was rushing to my head so he sat me down for a little while and kept saying stuff and I DIED.

"That's it, remember to breathe."

"I know it's a lot, just take your time." 🥵

"You did so good sweetheart."

Anyway, apparently I now have a thing for dentists.

[winethorn]

i cant decide

(was this too many choices again?)

[windser]

have some unsolicited jiyan thirst bc i finally got around to his quest —

yes, jiyan is sweet. yes, jiyan is well-mannered and disciplined. we all love and adore general jiyan. but what is this man enthralled with? after a long day, when all he can piece together outside of strategies and regimens is what the softness of your pliant body will feel like when he molds your curves into the hard planes of his muscles. yes, jiyan can be gentle but what if sometimes he doesn't want to? give this man the green light and he gets just a lil bit feral? band ripped from his hair, blue tresses tumbling down and sticking to your sweaty forms. he absolutely loses it the moment after he slides his arm under your throat, muscle straining with the effort to both rein in your thrashing and squirming while still giving you the ability to breathe, but you just have to strike that chord and bite down on his bicep. maybe in retaliation or just because your a brat. all he knows is yes, jiyan very much loves leaving you boneless and unable to do anything but take it.

[konigsblog]

mmf' , i just want eldritch/cthulh!könig to take care of me. headcannons for him because he rots my mine, day and night ... :(

cthulhu!könig who finds himself crawling towards you with his lengthy cock hanging heavy, smelling your period blood from a mile away. he eats fish and dead men, sunken boats that dare to cross his path, along with deceased sea animals. he can't help himself from wrapping his long, murky tentacles around your thighs, keeping your cunt against his mouth as he drags his tongue up and down between your wet, sloppy slit.

“please, sonne, just relax against me. taste so good, so good for me..”

cthulhu!könig and his jealousy issue. he can't stand seeing other sea gods flirt with you in an attempt to swoon over you. but god, he loves making you ride his tentacles after declining them, easing down onto his thick limp, suckers grazing against your gummy walls.

cthulhu!könig who orders you to chant his name while he fucks you. usually, his sex is slow and sensual, with one tentacle stuffed inside youe sweet, precious pussy and another silencing your whiney sounds. but, he adores your stuttered sounds as you chant his name like a prayer to an ancient god.

cthulhu!könig and his breeding kink. he's so fascinated with the idea of breeding you, to see you with a human/octopus hybrid, cradled in your arms. but, due to his issues with jealousy and your attention, he prefers it just being you two. though, he does mention getting you pregnant while you cockwarm a tentacle, his suckers leaking out their substances into your womb, making you sob out in a mixture of pain and pleasure.

“gott, ich möchte dich geschwollen mit meinen babys sehen, einen kleinen oktopus, der in diesem bauch wächst ... meine süße meerjungfrau, du bist so naiv, du weißt nicht, was du mit mir machst, keine ahnung, oder?”

cthulhu!könig being overprotective and possessive of you. you're his most prized possession, a mortal, a human soon to be turned to immortal once he impregnates you with his offspring. he hates whenever other sea gods have their eyes on you, glaring at the before snarling, brushing the wet hair stick to your forehead as he eases your head into the water, washing your hair.

cthulhu!könig who always buys you proper pearl necklaces, as well as other shells. the faint sounds of the ocean in the distance, the sun just rising above the horizon, breathless from könig's tentacles wrapped tightly and securely around your waist. he definitely scolds you whenever you complain, hissing at you and being strict, keeping you from ever leaving.

“don't, meine schatz ... still still, sonnenschein.”

he has a fear of someone taking you, so he usually stays with you. he'd kill for you, other sea gods, do anything to keep you from going back to society.

cthulhu!könig and how he coos at you for being so grumpy and pissy about being away from your friends and family. why do you need anyone else? let the 10ft muscular giant with a gut keep you safe!! your life isn't in jeopardy or danger, just spread your legs and let him treat you right.

⭒ if you want to correct any german, please do so! im not educated on the german language so i have to use a translator for it, but i don't mind constructive criticism to help with it :)

[wheneverfeasible]

~Wiggly 🧠 🪱 Wednesday~

Eeee thank you for the tag @hotluncheddie, this is my first brain worm tag and that’s super exciting, buuuttttttt…

So I actually just realized that I’ve recently hit the anniversary time of when I went No Contact with my family, and I know that that I’ve began kinning Steve more since then due to his own terrible family.

So then I was thinking about Steve, who it’s been years since he walked away from his family, since he found his true family, and he’s doing okay for himself. Maybe not an amazing career or anything, but he’s found something that he’s relatively happy with and he’s got people who love him in his corner and yeah, sometimes it still hurts, but he’s moved past it all.

Until one day, completely unexpectedly, his mom comes into his place of business.

Maybe they threw him out, maybe he left of his own choice because he realized that they would never be what he wanted or needed them to be. They never truly knew him and never cared about him, at least not enough to ever choose him over anything else, so it hurt but ultimately it wasn’t hard to leave them, only hard to leave the life he used to know.

He and Robin were roommates now, because obviously, and it was a shitty little place, but it was theirs, and they’re happy, and their friends are over all the time to the point that Eddie practically lives there too, which is…nice.

Really nice.

Steve has come to accept the fact that he isn’t entirely straight, and part of that is the reason he no longer speaks to his family, and he’s even come to terms with the fact that he might have a teensy tiny itty bitty little crush on his best friend, Eddie Munson. Which is fine. He’s used to having crushes on friends and having them be unreciprocated.

Except Eddie has been sending him some signals that maybe it’s not entirely unreciprocated. And he’s starting to feel confident, starting to feel like maybe he could actually be genuinely happy with someone…

And that’s when he sees his mom. It’s been years since he last saw her, but suddenly all that pain and hurt he thought he had grown past is tearing through his chest and up his throat and he feels his heart rate accelerating and his breathing is growing choppy and he can’t breathe can’t breathe can’t breathe—

He’s thought about, before, what he would tell his parents if he ever saw them again. About how he would call them out for being terrible people who never cared about him, only saw what he could offer them, about the image they wanted to show the world. Wanted to tell them of all the times he’s almost died and they never knew because they never cared enough to ask why he’d come home bruised and bloodied, or why he avoided the pool, or why he woke up screaming from nightmares. He thought about how good it would feel to say how he never needed them.

But he can’t say any of that now. All he can do is try not to pass out from hyperventilating because they were his family, his parents, and they should have loved him unconditionally but they never did. They never chose him over their friends, their jobs, their image. They never loved him and never would. They would never truly know him or accept him and all he wanted was for them to say that they were sorry and they never would.

Steve would like to think he could face his mother, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t he just couldn’t. So he hides, he runs, he disappears into the back and he can’t stop the tears because why was he never good enough for her or his dad? What was so wrong with him that they couldn’t love their own son?

And there’s no sort of resolution for him, no closure.

He finishes his shift, he goes home, and Robin and Eddie are there just like they were when he left that morning, and their immediate smiles at him being home slowly drops because even though he tries to hide it, they know.

He doesn’t want to talk about it, can’t talk about it, not yet. He does tell them that he saw his mom that day and he loves them because they get it, they understand, and they don’t make him talk about it. Robin makes him his favorite snack and drink, Eddie finds that movie he knows is Steve’s comfort movie and puts it on, and they don’t talk about it but they’re there.

And, curled against Eddie’s side with silent tears dripping off his nose and onto Eddie’s shirt, Eddie’s arm around him while Robin keeps him grounded with a hand caressing his leg on his other side, they let him mourn not what he lost, because he never had it to begin with, but what could have been.

And maybe, maybe one day Steve will be brave and tell Eddie what he means to him, but he’s too fragile at the moment. It will remain unspoken for now because he’s not ready. But maybe one day. And maybe that day is sooner, maybe that day is later, but there in his friends’ unconditional love, he knows that they’ll both wait for him to be ready.

Because his parents should have been his family but they’re not. They never were. And maybe he wasn’t ready yet, but one day he would be able to let them go because he knew that what he had with him right now was his real family, and that love was forever.

Yeah anyways the song Matilda by Harry Styles hits a little too close to home for me, and I think it’s fitting for Steve too.

no obligation tags since Wednesday is over but there’s always next week lololol: @derythcorvinus @stervrucht @katyawriteswhump

[eddiesghxst]

steddie x sensitive!reader where eddie’s ur best friend that you do ‘more than best friend’ things with and steve was the asshole at school that would tease you and always make you cry.

eddie knew about it but he didn’t know your bully was steve so when eddie and steve start working together and you stop by one day eddie doesn’t think much of it when u see steve and ur really jumpy and look like ur ready to bolt out of there because you’re often shy around strangers.

and steve doesn’t even fucking remember you and so when you leave steve is like “is she always that jumpy?? like was i being weird or??” and eddie just shakes his head and is like “nah she just has a hard time w strangers. some asshole used to tease the shit out of her in high school. she never told me who it was but the day i find out i swear i’ll hunt them down and strangle them myself.” and steve is like wow what kind of an asshole would do that to a girl like you??

because steve thinks you’re pretty and sweet and he likes you and he thinks he wants to ask you out but how will he do that when he: 1 - can’t seem to have a conversation with you and not scare you off 2 - is convinced you and eddie are definitely dating even if eddie says it’s not like that and 3 - can’t decide who he’s more jealous of when he sees how close you two are

because is that even normal? is it normal to like two people at the same time? is it normal to feel left out when you and eddie are snuggled together during movie night? is it normal to want to hold both of your hands, kiss both you, touch both of you??? iS iT ?!!?!

[becca-e-barnes]

I've been way too into hot wife stuff at the minute, I blame Serenity Cox and it got me thinking about being Steve's wife but he's really into watching you with Bucky.

Most of the appeal for Steve is that you and Bucky really degrade him. He gets to watch his little wife cum on his best friend's cock while you both taunt him and he never thought he'd be into it the way that he is.

"Your girl's so fuckin' tight, Steve." Bucky pants, slowing his thrusts into you because if he keeps up his current pace, he'll cum faster than he wants to. "Does Stevie fill you the way I do? Bet he can't. He's not as big as me."

You shake your head, staring right at Steve. "Not even close. You're pathetic, aren't you Stevie? You'd rather watch me get fucked by your best friend."

You know it's mean but Steve fucking loves it. He's cum four times already and he's still jerking himself off. It's like he just can't stop and it's so thrilling to see him enjoy this as much as he is.

"I'm gonna cum in your girl, Steve. Gonna make you watch me stuff her so full. Just imagine your pretty little wife with my cum dripping out of her greedy cunt. If you're lucky, she might let you fuck her after I'm finished." Bucky's not usually so vulgar but God, it works wonders for both you and Steve.

"I don't know. I'm not sure if I'll ever want to fuck Steve again." Hearing you say that sends Steve over the edge, spilling a fresh load all over himself while he groans pathetically and even then, he doesn't stop.

"I can't blame you. Now you know how it feels to be fucked right. Felt you cum on me more times than I can count." Bucky's not wrong but his excitement is building and you feel his pace start to falter.

"Fuck, oh fuck." You whimper, feeling the first few pulses of his cock and the unmistakable feeling of his load splashing into your eager body. You've needed this. You were desperate for it and after a second you realise neither of you needed it more than Steve did.

"Good girl, fuckin' take it. I can't stop." Bucky groans, pressed as deep inside you as he can get, pumping his cum right to your cervix. He cums for what feels like an eternity and it's pure bliss.

By the time he's finished, Steve is trembling with need once more.

"If you don't want your wife knocked up with your best friend's baby, I suggest you get to work." You tease, pressing Steve back on the bed and repositioning yourself so you're sitting on his face, letting his best friend's cum drip out of you and into his eager, waiting mouth.

[blossoms-phan]

i know I’ve been watching them for over 10 years atp and a lot of us here discovered them way back when but sometimes it really hits me that I started watching dnp when I was 11 and I can literally go back and read posts from 2014 and my own journal entries where I say things like “i hope I’ll be in the phandom forever!! i love dan and phil for life” and “let’s all hope and pray to sister daniel” (yes this is real after that first pic years ago lmao if only I knew) and calling phil a “precious angel son” (yes this is real also who knew) and idk just. im still here! haven’t been in phandom spaces for all those years but coming back has been the best decision. i made so many lovely connections and friends all those years ago which didn’t really last bc a lot of people stopped watching them but that’s okay bc I’ve made new ones here and it’s just so fun being able to share my thoughts and posts and interact with this community. love dnp love y’all sm <3

[eff-plays]

I think, me personally, I want my fic to portray Astarion as I interpret his in-game self, in that yes he is awful, and an awful person for most of it, but he is also capable of change if you guide him to it. Cuz that's canonically a thing he can do.

It's weird to always classify him as inherently and irrevocably evil. It's also weird to classify him as a secretly soft twee baby who just has some traumas you need to massage out with the power of love.

As a writer, I want to show that Astarion is a bad person, but that he has the capacity, and more importantly, the will to change, once he is given the proper tools and freedom to do so.

There's also an interesting aspect of him being a video game character, who by definition must obey the player's agency. It's a difficult thing to balance, because once you take the gameplay aspect from his story out of the equation, your job as an author is to fill that space with his own in-universe agency. And people fill that space differently.

That's also probably partly why you get people who insist he's good deep down inside and just needs to shed all his bad traits ("I can fix him") and people who think he's thoroughly evil and any change for the better is OOC ("I like that he's unfixable"). Both camps are equally mad at the other because both of them are equally "correct," in that the game allows for the player to insert those thoughts where the narrative leaves room for interpretation. Nobody can win the argument because the argument is by design unwinnable. Both are correct. Neither is more true than the other.

It's easier to dunk on bad takes in traditional media where the text is fixed, where the interpretations can range from accurate to bonkers depending on your level of literacy. In games, especially story-heavy ones, there are spaces literally made to allow for player interpretation, interaction, and alteration.

So, to me, I think it's important to show that Astarion is a bad person, but that he is capable of change. That's my take on his character, his story, and what I find the most compelling. Others may disagree, and that's fine, but seeing two technically-incorrect-but-good-luck-proving-it-because-both-have-their-points teams overtake the conversation is quite frustrating to say the least.

[skunkes]

can i ask why ur getting the surgery? /gen curious /no hate

i am getting a bi(lateral)salp(ingectomy) bc i never want to be pregnant or be a parent!

Even if i do change my mind later about the parent thing (not super likely but things can change, sure) theres noooo shortage of single parents lmao

And even if I never End Up In The Circumstance(s) Where I COULD Become Pregnant in my life, I'd want the peace of mind anyway...

I've always felt disgusted that this is something my body is capable of. I want it to be MY body and not a site and vessel for potential tragedy in any direction. And I want it to be something permanent and not dependent on access to services/medicines or even laws!!! Dis is a gender affirming surgery for me honestly...

[midnightmoons28]

Finally experienced eating 🐱 and I might be obsessed!!!