#like his arc in the show is beautiful and tragic and he was so so doomed by the narrative

[tanjir0se]

Imagine if Tanjiro and the gang met Rengoku's ghost while visiting Tengen or something. Imagine them smelling guts and demon blood but feeling soothed and before them appears Rengoku as a ghost. The man they knew only for a night,the man they only met on the battlefield,soothing them with congratulations while smelling like the thing they've been hunting. Imagine if Tengen himself smelled it. The composed flashy ninja smelling the odor of the battlefield he retired from so grandly and with the honor of killing two upper moons and flinging himself off of his chair with a sword in hand ready to relive those days a last time,only to see the last vestiges of his best friend,his brother in arms,the last brother he ever had left,the brother that he was never forced to hurt,the family that he could truly love. And Rengoku is there looking at him with that kind smile,congratulating the old ninja for his work and vanishing as the great and grandiose Tengen breaks down,with his neglected tear ducts releasing so much fluid that the eyepatch over his ruined eye gets destroyed from the salt of the hashira's tears. Rengoku's ghost would probably always smell like guts from the battlefield since that's where most met him but it would always be soothing,for Rengoku was the heart of the flame,the soothing bonfire that people could gather around. He was the heart of the people personified,warm and bold and most of all kind

IMAGINE IF MY LIFE COULD BE HAPPY FOR ONCE

Tengen and Kyo as besties and brothers in armsis actually so important to me because you’re so right he was like his last brother and now he’s lost him too. And even if they get to visit him as a ghost the overwhelming reminder of what happened to him still lingers and immmmmmm going to throw myself in a lake

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

since it's pride month, i want to highlight my favorite underrated/underappreciated queer characters and ships! (part 1/???)

(feel free to add more!)

Lake - Infinity Train (non-canon)

it's not canon but you cannot tell me that Lake isn't an allegory for trans/nb people. her arc is so beautiful and her character resonates with me so much!

i have to admit, i actually kinda hated her in the beginning because of how aggressive and rude she was, but she actually gets good character development and you can also understand why she was the way she was, being a good representation of a minority who is constantly suffering because of the social norms she’s forced into. also i don’t ship her with jesse but i do like the idea of them in a qpr or just being platonic besties.

(i use she/her pronouns for Lake because that's what they use in the series, but also because not all non-binary people use they/them, and it's kinda weird to see people insist on using they/them for Lake just because she's nb-coded. she has never shown an aversion to bring referred to with she/her pronouns.)

Le Chevre x El Topo - Carmen Sandiego (canon)

they are side characters who don't play a huge role in the narrative but they are a really cute couple and have been confirmed to be canon! even without the confirmation, it’s clear that they were written to be a romantic couple.

mild spoiler: after the series ends, they stop being antagonists and instead put up a food truck together! it’s the cutest thing, i swear

Ryan x Min-gi - Infinity Train (non-canon)

my OTP through and through! i say non-canon but the romance is so heavily implied, you cannot ignore it.

they're a good example of childhood friends who had a complicated relationship where both individuals did something wrong, but in the end, they grow as people and manage to mend their relationship together.

Moomin x Snufkin - Moominvalley (canon)

i have only read one of the books and watched a few clips of these two characters but from that alone, it's clear that they were written as lovers (and the author is queer too!)

they are a beautiful portrayal of long-distance relationship where both individuals have different needs in life, but still want to be with each other regardless.

Terrestrius / Terry - The Dragon Prince (canon)

Terry is canonically transmasc and they actually manage to explain this in the series, without making it sound too forced or expository. he's such a sweetheart too, and his relationship with Claudia is actually really sweet, despite the fact that she's one of the villains.

Carmen x Julia - Carmen Sandiego (non-canon)

again, i say non-canon but it is heavily implied that they have feelings for each other, especially in the extra interactive episode, where Carmen leaves a bouquet of red roses for Julia, and Julia is shown to blush when receiving them.

Amaya x Janai - The Dragon Prince (canon)

what’s that? it’s actually possible to write an enemies to lovers romance that is healthy and not extremely abusive?

Amaya and Janai have such a good relationship in S5 (and Amaya is also a great disabled representation!) Janai actually learns sign language to communicate with Amaya, and there are no unnecessary miscommunication plots or drama, they’re just a really loving wlw couple.

Benson x Troy - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts (canon)

when i say we need more mlm ships in animated media!! i’m so glad us sapphics are getting a lot of representation but it’s time cartoons started including more queer men.

benson and troy are just a really sweet couple with a good relationship that doesn’t have a ton of pining or unnecessary angst. while i love complex and tragic queer relationships, i also think that it’s good to show teenagers just being teenagers sometimes.

this opinion seems to be scarce in the queer community, which really annoys me tbh.

Raine x Eda - The Owl House (canon)

i cannot believe that given the popularity of TOH, Raeda is still such an overlooked ship. this might be an unpopular opinion but Raeda is better written and has more chemistry than Lumity and Huntlow.

just within the span of Raine's introductory episode, they managed to establish a clearly romantic past between these two characters, and also an interesting dynamic. and even though they didn't have much screentime, they still turned out to be the best ship in the series. (again, just my opinion, don't come at me)

i think it's so important to show older queer people in media, just as it is important to show younger queer characters. it helps establish the fact that queerness has always existed and isn't some newfound trend that social media invented. not to mention, raeda is one of the very few canon ships that include a non-binary character.

[acourtofthought]

I find Lucien's story to be set up in such a tragically beautiful way.

Cassian, Rhys, Az. They are over centuries old and while they hadn't yet found their mates in all that time, while they weren't entirely sure they existed, I imagine they still had hope. They wondered if it would ever happen to them, if they'd find her and though they at times were probably left feeling as if they never would, there was a small part of them that believed it was still possible (something Cassian confirms when he says deep down he was holding out for a bond and Az who according to Rhys still wondered why a bond between he and Mor hadn't yet snapped).

But Lucien spent centuries thinking his chance at that kind of love was taken from him. He believed he had her and lost her to death and that was it, there would be no possible love for him that would be greater than marriage, a gift from the Mother. No way to love someone so much that even if one didn't snap immediately, he thought it was a real possibility that it someday would because he already knew he'd had that one chance and it slipped through his fingers.

Lucien has spent centuries without even that kernel of hope that the others had.

Then one day his mating bond did snap and with it a torrent of emotions. Guilt and a sense of betrayal to the memory of Jesminda but maybe, the first hope he's had in centuries of the ability to actually love again. To feel he might be allowed to open his heart to another because he knows mating bonds are a gift.

Only to be left hopeless once more upon the realization that Elain was in love with someone else, that she wanted to marry someone else. So he sets off on what is essentially a suicide mission because what else is there for him but to sacrifice himself for the greater good, to show that he believes in Elain's vision and will do what he can to help them win this war. Not because there's anything left for him to personally fight for, he has no home, he's once again left without love, his closest friendships are in a tenuous state.

Then that spark of hope is reignited at the end of ACOWAR when Elain chooses to walk with Feyre and him rather than staying behind. When she peers up at him and invites him to come to Velaris.

Only to .......... well, we know the rest.

I believe that SJM has written Lucien's arc this way because only the best things are in his future but his story so far is so unbearably tragic to me. This is a male who continues trying to move forward despite having lost all hope. Who, the moment he sees a flicker in the darkness has it suddenly taken away yet he keeps going. He helps those around him regardless of feeling it is of any benefit to him. He helps those in Spring despite them not truly being his people. He helps the NC despite them not truly being his people. He helps those in the human lands despite them not truly being his people.

To me, THIS is why Lucien is the King of Men of the ACOTAR series. Everything he does is to the benefit of others despite getting very little in return. He gives and takes nothing, expects nothing.

When an author writes them like that?? Yeah, Lucien is not going to be getting some second-rate love story. He's going to be part of Feyre's family as her brother-in-law (SJM isn't on record talking about the crazy chemistry of their friendship for nothing), he's going to be High Lord. And he's going to get the girl.

[the-heartlines]

real, genuine question…how are so many of my fellow shippers okay with dead dove helaemond in fanfic but not in the show? because that’s hypocritical as fuck. lmao.

because as someone who adores dead dove, i am living for the direction they’re taking helaemond. listen, linda…

*hotd leaks/spoilers*

aemond is not a nice person. he is slowly losing his grasp on things because he saw the dragon power rhaenyra has gained and he’s also a targaryen prince. he is desperate, pathetic, arrogant, prideful, in a patriarchal society where his godlike hubris has manifested after claiming a dragon, along with the hate that has lived, grew inside him ever since getting his eye taken and a father who turned his eyes from his sons, to never pour affection or literally care for him at all lbr.

the way in which he grabbed helaena so carelessly and harshly, not daring to give her feelings, her pain a second thought, to drag her into a war with him that they’re losing. (that she knows they’re going to lose)

“aemond is abusive for grabbing helaena like that.” i do not believe he is inherently abusive towards helaena. if he continues to act this way towards her, which i seriously doubt after she clocked his ass, (silence, omega!) then yes. but…an absolute dickhead of a brother going mad who acted rashly and stupidly that should get bitch-slapped? yes 1000%, because he’s so desperate, realizing that he fucked up royally burning aegon and sunfyre, that he cannot face multiple dragons alone. (lmao my idiot sandwich son 💀😭)

he’s always felt like a god after claiming vhagar, feeling superior to others because of his dragonblood, but here’s thing. helaena has predicted everything that has happened to him. they are interlinked because she has seen all that will befall him. and he’s beyond terrified here. the scene on the balcony where he confronts her post grabbing her so brutally, showing his hand ghosting hers, how his goddamn voice goes quiet, begging her to lay waste to their enemy—daemon—almost in a meekly genuine tone which we have never heard?! the little boy begging his big sister for help. “the heed to a truer calling” what he’s been taught all his life, that his blood is superior. and then he has tears in his eyes which get even more glassy with more tears of terror when she reveals her dragon dreams, knowing he burnt their brother, telling him of his death, that what he does won’t change anything. aemond’s threats of having her put to death are empty, and lmao worthy because he pretty much just came begging on his hands and knees to ask her to fight. but pookie don’t give a fuck. she knows how this will end and that the death of her family, aemond, the dragons, is the only way to ensure peace in the realm.

my beautiful fucked up doomed tragic sibling duo. i do believe helaemond in s3 will be something delicious if they decide to have aemond work with helaena and expand her dreamer arc, because they’re paralleling her with alys. especially since alys told daemon that he would die in the beginning of the szn and now helaena telling aemond how he’ll die in the finale, after he begs her to fly to harrenhal with him. the daemond x daelys x helaemond x helys parallels be paralleling.

[boobi-boy]

HOT TAKE. As a society, we are conditioned to hate final seasons. This is fair. We were all betrayed by Game of Thrones and Supernatural and whatnot. As someone who has never watched these (I have only heard generalised complaints about them), let me (drunkenly) yap about the Umbrella Academy s4.

I'm gonna try and keep this vaguely organised.

Luther

I was an adamant Luther hater back in season one and two, I will admit, meeting his actor at Comic Con in 2021 did colour my opinion a little bit, but I loved him in season three. I mean, his romance with Sloane always felt a little rushed to me, but it was certainly sweet, and their wedding was a nice tie in to the "we only see each other at weddings and funerals" thing.

Pros;

In season four, I loved him. He's optimistic about life and goes to great lengths to brighten the moods of people around him, which is the kind of person he lacked all his life. He's being the person he always needed and I love that for him.

The implication that he's pushing aside his festering feelings of dissatisfaction for his life to be there for other people is so moving, and also I love those moments where him and Allison get to just be normal siblings, showing that he's moved on from that toxic era of his life.

His fight scenes are epic and he's all round a good character this season. I understand people's disdain for being sidelined, along with his grief for Sloane, but there are a certain two factors that should be taken into consideration here. The first being that, by s4e1, its been six years since he lost her. He has probably processed that grief and moved on by now, despite how profound the loss. Obviously he still thinks about her, which is why he occasionally brings her up, but it's been a long time. Additionally, he's semi-sidelined because his character arc was pretty well rounded by the end of s3. He's moved on from Allison and was on a trajectory for a healthier life. Its tragic that he lost Sloane, but good that he continued trying to be happy.

Cons;

I do wish his relationship with Ben had been more developed this season. To me, I think the implication is that he's hanging on to Sparrow Ben as a brother (in-law) because he's the closest remaining connection to the Sparrow Academy, therefore Sloane.

Why is he living in the decrepit Sparrow Academy house? Why? Literally why??? This needed more explanation.

Diego

My mother hates him. I lowkey love him. In season two, his character plus his saviour complex was explored so fucking well. I loved him then. I think his character in season three is a decent testament to how boring 'settling down' can be.

Pros;

He reacts very well to everything that happens. That's the best way I could explain it. The realisation that sometimes life is just normal. Its a sweet plotline and I enjoyed it

I loved his relationship with Luther, his visit to the CIA and the fun approach to his power this season.

His final words to Lila, that he knew she didn't mean to hurt him, were so mature and a brilliant way of rounding off his character with a sense of satisfaction and finality. I loved it so much. In that moment, before everything, he was her husband, and that was beautiful.

Cons;

I have very few. I think his depiction as a mailman is silly. I just wish it had been a different job.

Also I wish he'd spoken more Punjabi because I'm pretty sure (correct me if I'm wrong) he learnt that to converse with Lila and her family in their native language, despite Lila's family speaking English.

Why was he immature enough to fight with Five over his wife when the literal world was ending? Not very consistent with his character development but I still liked that scene. Honestly, that was obviously written in as a segue to Five going back to the subway so I guess it did have to be there it just felt a bit weird.

Allison

Oh dear God. Allison Hargreeves, what happened to you? I loved her so much in seasons one and two. Season three Allison ruined everything ever forever. Not through bad writing. Through very good and despicably devastating writing. She has lost so much and she coped with it so badly that she altered all of time to avoid her grief. The evillest girlboss of all time.

Pros;

CLAIRE! Claire Bear. I love you. Thank you season four for giving us Claire and Claire/Allison bonding time.

Also the fact that she's coping with her being a terrible human being by babysitting Klaus for five years (which she is obviously very spiteful about) is very well written.

I like the return of Allison badassery when she shows up and literally busts a man's balls.

I like how she ends the show being physically vulnerable and now Klaus is taking care of her now. That was cute.

Also I love that she's being held accountable for her actions and it makes her a slightly better person! That was fun.

I like that we learn that without her power she was a B-list actor at best.

Cons;

What the fuck were her powers this season? I know they got janky marigold but why is she literally just telekinetic now????

Why didn't they tell us why Ray walked out? She literally altered time to get him back. Like, I know Allison has fucked up every relationship she's ever had but PLEASE tell us what happened.

Also fuck you for what you did to Klaus.

Klaus.

Oh, Klaus Hargreeves, the man that you were. Season one. TRAGIC. I loved it. Season two, the exact same commentary. Season three, I loved him so much, he keeps being my FAVOURITE and also the idea that the drugs and trauma thwarted the full potential of his powers, but the drugs was the only thing that could keep him sane because of his trauma and his powers was so cool. Well done for beginning to overcome your rampant daddy issues Klaus. Season four. He is still my favourite.

Pros;

Having him sell his body in the weirdest way possible was amazing. I love to see it.

The moment between him and Claire where she knew exactly what was happening and he just repeats 'it's too late' and swears at her. Beautifully devastating.

Him getting buried alive was so fucking fitting I can't properly explain it I just love it.

His final line, and the third-to-final line of dialogue in the whole shows being 'I just wanna say, I love you guys, but you're all assholes' sums up perfectly. And it just had to be him that said that. He can never escape his nihilism and I love him for it. Its who he is.

Learning that the 'real' Klaus is a total germophobe was fun.

Cons;

Give my man more screen time. I beg. I am on my knees begging. Please Mr Blackman. Please Mr Way. Give the love of my life more screen time.

I wish Dave had been mentioned once or twice. Dave is forever a part of Klaus. Why didn't he try to contact him when he got his powers back? Why has he forgotten him? If Luther gets a Sloane mention then Klaus should have gotten a Dave mention. I guess Netflix hates the queers unless they're from Heartstopper (/j)

Five

Five is my mother's favourite and she was vomming this season because of you-know-what. The poor woman. She still loves him though, So did I. Five defines The Umbrella Academy. He spent two seasons wearing the uniform, he got the first f-bomb, he was responsible for SO much exposition. All in all, he is quintessential to the aesthetic, plot, and entire existence of the series. Did season four give him justice?

Pros;

I love Five being a CIA agent. This is so him.

Jerome is a funny name for him.

He doesn't ever stop being himself and I love that.

I like how blunt he is about the fact they all have to end their existence. He understands existentialism and his place in the universe more than his siblings (and most people ever) can fathom. It had to be him to deliver that news and he does it so well.

Cons;

The elephant in the room. Him and Lila. I see it. I see the vision. Yes. If two people spend seven years with only each other for company, suspended in time, they will probably develop a romantic relationship. That doesn't make me like it. It is in character for him to lie to Lila (or withhold information from her)about knowing the way home. I just hated every second of it. I thought they were going to steer clear of Five romantic relationships because of how weird his ageing is. He's mentally more than twenty years older than Lila and physically more than ten years younger than her. It is gross. I hate it. It was a reasonable plot choice Honestly, their relationship remaining strictly platonic would have been less realistic than what happened but when has this show ever been realistic? I will say, it makes sense for Five to revert to old coping mechanisms (I am referring to Delores) in a time like this, it's just that this time he had a real person to enact them with. In times of utter distress, Five is a romanticist, so at least his character is consistent.

Why didn't they let him wear a suit that fits him? That was not nice.

Ben

Sparrow Ben is a sexy cunt. I love how much of a knob he is. All the time. This season was a slay for him. We heart assimilation allegories for love and obsession.

Pros;

I repeat - I love the assimilation metaphor. He didn't get to go with grace. I've seen people criticising that he got no meaningful death scene but that's the point. His meaningful death was stolen from him because of his unhealthy obsession with Jennifer and how deeply in love with her he was. It's a commentary of how toxic and co-dependant relationships will destroy a person. I love it.

I love the scene where him and Jennifer are sat either side of the wall watching the same movie. That was so fucking cute.

Cons;

The CGI for his powers was shit. He looked like the squid version of She-Hulk.

Why have the Umbrellas just adopted him into his family? That was weird.

Victor

I have always loved him. Best trans representation I've ever seen. Autism coded. The amount of times I said 'His powers are just autism sensory overload' or 'his powers are just anger issues' has probably burned the phrase into my mother's mind.

Pros;

I like that he was a manwhore in Canada.

I love him having control over his powers this season. We support self control my man.

I love how adamant he is to save Ben. All this man has ever wanted was to save someone. And he never could. So he sacrificed himself to save the world.

Cons;

I was not here for the fit this season. The boots. The jean jacket. Not a serve. I am sorry.

He was kinda cringe and irrelevant this season I'm not gonna lie.

Lila

Thank you Lila for being what I picture when I hear Golden Brown. It makes me happy.

Pros;

A devoted mother. We love her. I also love that her character involves her children but she's more than that. But she still sacrifices everything for them. "Make sure to read to Gracie every night! And don't let the twins fight!" absolutely destroyed me.

I don't know what it is but her fit ate this season.

Her final words being 'Fuck you!' was fun.

Cons;

Her 'LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME' personality got annoying after about four episodes. Not even in s4, just in general.

I wish her backstory had been more addressed this season. It was just completely ignored. Sad.

The Plot.

Pros;

If this show is anything, it is self aware. It makes fun of itself for just doing the apocalypse four times. I love it.

The tragic ending. Too many shows have happy endings these days. I need my bittersweet tragedy and the Umbrella Academy delivered. It actually made me bawl because these characters meant so fucking much to me.

I always said that Klaus's story couldn't end without him dying. I also felt like Five dying would work. Now I think that if one of them goes, they all have to. They were born at the same time and they died that way too. It explains WHY they keep ending the world. Their very existence is apocalyptic. They are a collective incarnation of the apocalypse and that just rounds off the show in such a meaningful way.

I know people hate the 'one true timeline' thing and the 'they all die' thing and feel like its a copout, but its so beautiful to me. They were the problem the whole time. They can't just find some creative and resourceful way out of it this time. This is the end. That's WHY the SONG in the TRAILER WAS 'THE END' by My Chemical Romance!!!!!!!!!!!

Cons;

The plot holes like why does Luther getting his powers back give him his monkey body back when the life-saving surgery that he didn't need in this timeline didn't happen???

Along with many other plot holes that have already been pointed out within this post and by other people a million times so I won't go through the tedium of doing what has already been done.

Special mentions!

The Gene & Jean dance scene! The show knew they couldn't get away with making the Umbrellas dance again but they needed an obligatory Umbrella Academy dance scene and they ATE IT UP.

The song they danced to was also a banger, which segues nicely into my next mention which is the SOUNDTRACK. It SLAPS. Muse! Bloodhound Gang! Cher! ALL IN ONE SHOW. The Umbrella Academy's soundtrack has always been amazing and season four is not any different.

The closing line "On the eighth of august 2024" etc. DESTROYED ME.

THE USE OF 'I THINK WE'RE ALONE NOW' KILLED ME.

THE POST CREDITS WITH THE MARIGOLD FLOWERS AAAAGHHH.

ALL THE SIDE CHARACTERS UGH.

Also, the production photos from across the years in the credits. I loved them so fucking much.

They kept handling Victor's trans storyline well, not pretending he was never a girl and including him in flashbacks. Idk I liked it.

Diego naming his daughter after his mother is so sweet.

Random criticism though - the casting for the teen versions of the Umbrellas was ATROCIOUS. Klaus somehow looked five years old and in his mid forties at the same time.

[o-wild-west-wind]

okay, here’s my actual thoughtful post: I get why people are upset about the finale…I really do. but I want to mention that there’s a bigger picture to this story that’s missing if you’re zooming too close onto Izzy as a character, and I’m honestly so grateful that the show stuck to the thematic arc it introduced in season 1 because, as per usual, it’s about the themes 🤌 and this show never skimps on the symbolism!!

so here’s the thing: the primary themes are toxic masculinity (& it’s opposite, queer joy); trauma; love as a healing force for the above; and, title alert—DEATH. because it’s so much more than a cool title!

now, Izzy has always represented something metaphorical about all of these points; most directly, he’s always represented masculinity, and s2 has been an arc of toxicity deconstruction. but crucially, he’s also represented all that for Ed, who is the deuteragonist of this show. because—don’t forget—Stede and Ed are the show.

I’ve always doubted myself for feeling this after seeing how fandom saw Izzy as a third romantic figure (which like by all means have a blast in your fanfics I don’t care it’s about joy at the end of the day and pursue that as you want to), but after hearing something about djenks referring to Izzy as a father figure, it confirms a major point for me—Izzy is also in a lot of ways a parallel to Ed’s dad, and a representation of the trauma and guilt Ed felt from that formative killing. for so long, Izzy was an aggressive shadow in Ed’s life, and a tangible reminder of those daddy issues—someone telling him what to do, keeping him Blackbeard—and the beautiful thing is how that changed this season, how Izzy became a version of masculinity that could love and be beautiful and make good from the hurt, the literal poison into positivity. someone antithetical to his own paternalistic force, healing our daddy issues one drag show at a time. BUT, Izzy is still thematically representative within Ed’s arc—and by also representing the trauma that made Ed “Blackbeard,” it does make smart writing sense as to why Izzy died (NOT saying you can’t be sad about it—stick with me for a moment).

because here’s the thing—as aforementioned, this show is also about DEATH. killing is the root of everyone’s trauma, and reconciling a relationship with death is the ultimate arc Ed and Stede are both on, with the ultimate path of learning to live despite its inevitability. there’s a reason it was such a huge thing that Ed couldn’t personally kill, and then in this episode killed so many people with his bare hands in the name of love—and there’s a reason that was framed as a good thing. and there’s also Ed’s (and arguably Stede’s) active suicidality, which has been a huge force driving this season. these are characters who see death as this all-consuming thing, and they see their own deaths as the only solution. death is the traumatic force driving almost everything about their being for so long—and its reconciliation is everything for them, the greatest sign of growth. so Izzy’s death, and everyone beginning again with love—healing each other with love—is a cap to it all. it’s death as a positive force, for once. it’s death as love, not trauma. it’s death as something that will always happen, but this time not forced by your own hand. it’s a death to everything toxic, to what “Blackbeard” represented, and all the while a sort of rebirth. it’s kind of a death to…death? it’s functionally like the real physical moon replacing the giant romantic imaginary orb: it’s taking the thing that’s been artificially morphed in Stede and Ed’s heads and making it real this time, with all the bittersweet emotions that come with tangible reality.

and honestly, I’m glad that it was tragic and emotional. I didn’t think I’d be so devastated to see Izzy die, but it really did get to me, especially because of everything he said to Ricky and then to Ed. but think of it this way: Izzy and Ed might be romantically compelling because they were toxic and charged (and I hope people still enjoy everything they get from that dynamic in fan work), but imagine if the show had actually gone in that direction—where would it take us thematically? it would kill the thesis; it would be love as chaos and entertainment, but not healing. instead, this show gave us something so much more powerful: a legitimate, fully-fleshed trauma arc.

trauma hurts. Izzy’s death hurts. but that’s okay. that’s great, actually! it means the storytelling was effective—that Izzy’s arc made you feel something. and i know this won’t be every viewer’s experience, but honestly? I’m glad I can have this grieving process in such a beautifully framed light in the safe space ship of this show, because let’s be real—death, real life death, fucks you up. and let me tell you, I could’ve used this show during so many episodes of grief in my life. but here it is now, reminding us that our grief and trauma doesn’t define us—and WHAT a powerful thing for queer love, especially, to be presented as the thing that heals us all. ESPECIALLY when so much grief and death in this community is woven so deeply with the trauma of our identity.

so grieve as you need to, but don’t forget to turn the poison into positivity 💛 because that’s what the show is telling us—choose live, despite!

[angy-grrr]

btw, im not waiting a whole week just to see izu///ocha confession, and tbh I dont think hori would spend that energy in it -he didnt before after all. I just think a platonic interpretation opens up the possibilities for closing more arcs -for example, the whole control your heart, the future of heroes and villains, etc.

Doing a confession would actually be too abrupt in my opinion, considering she is here crying over Himiko, this isnt about him and loving him.

EDIT:

btw this doesnt mean im dropping bnha. Im just saying I dont think it makes sense to wait two weeks for a confession of a ship that has not that much development in the first place -and this isnt about time spent with them. Its about emotional investment. Ochako and Himiko dont have the spotlight that much when thinking about all the manga chapters and arcs, however it got a loyal fanbase because the times they are together they are impactful. We didnt even know she was this invested in Toga in those ways, like the lovely smile and liking it ever since she saw it for the first time, until she said it. After only two chapters, they felt like a very beautiful and tragic ship because they care for the other in ways incomparable with others, and their dynamic feels extremely romantic. In another hand, izu//ocha doesnt have that feeling at all even if they have more panels together -there were many ways to connect them in a relevant way, but their moments arent as emotionally charged.

When Ochako jumped to defend Izuku for example; it could have been like that but instead we have her thinking about who saves heroes when focusing on him -this isnt emotional for them together-, and when she talks about smiles, her mind jumps to Himiko crying -this is personal and emotional at the same time. If we had her thinking "who will save villains" for Himiko, it would come out as way less romantic for canon; and if we had her thinking randomly about Izuku like she did at the beginning, with drawings of her face with an embarrassing expression or starting accepting it, it would be more romantic*

Its not that they have nothing in common, or dont care about each other in a meaningful way, its just that Hori decided to focus on other relationships instead of them together. The togachako confrontation in comparison shows us how he can focus on mainly the pair without forgetting about other important characters or feelings -she thought about him, and confessed she fell in love with him, yet it hit me way harder when she remembered her sad smile.

They just are... casual? It doesnt get me invested in them because none of their moments are intimate, I think (I mean Himiko and Ochako feel way closer than Izuku and Ochako even when they share goals and have cute moments, maybe bc some of the themes that hori seemed to introduce in the beginning for them got dropped after Katsuki was chosen to remain as a supportive pillar for Izuku. I hope the phrasing comes out as I intended!)

*I guess the closer to this would be her wishing him to give his best when she was at the helicopter, but personally I dont count it as random because everyone was feeling the same -and Iida is the link to this, narratively speaking. It wasn't her in the helicopter in a different scene with nobody else discussing these topics, neither it was Izuku thinking of this aspect of her on his own. So it doesnt come off as impactful.

[sinfulsalutations]

𝕝𝕚𝕜𝕖 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕝 𝕡𝕖𝕠𝕡𝕝𝕖 𝕕𝕠 ⋆*･ﾟ𝕒𝕣𝕔 𝕥𝕣𝕠𝕠𝕡𝕖𝕣 𝕖𝕔𝕙𝕠

➼ ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ ☆ ᴇᴄʜᴏ x ꜰ!ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

➼ ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ ☆ ᴇᴄʜᴏ ᴍᴇᴇᴛꜱ ʜᴇʀ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ: ᴛʜᴇ ɢɪʀʟ ᴡʜᴏ ɴᴇᴠᴇʀ ꜱᴛᴏᴘᴘᴇᴅ ʟᴏᴠɪɴɢ ʜɪᴍ ᴇᴠᴇɴ ᴡʜᴇɴ ꜱʜᴇ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ꜱʜᴇ’ᴅ ʟᴏꜱᴛ ʜɪᴍ ꜰᴏʀᴇᴠᴇʀ. ᴡʜᴇɴ ʜᴇ ɪɴꜱɪꜱᴛꜱ ʜᴇ ɪꜱɴ’ᴛ ᴛʜᴇ ꜱᴀᴍᴇ ᴍᴀɴ, ꜱʜᴇ ᴘʀᴏᴠᴇꜱ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɴᴏᴛ ᴇᴠᴇʀʏᴛʜɪɴɢ ʜᴀꜱ ᴄʜᴀɴɢᴇᴅ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛʜɪɴɢꜱ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴅᴏɴ’ᴛ ᴍᴀᴛᴛᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ʜᴇʀ.

➼ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴇɴᴛ ☆ ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴀ ʜᴀᴘᴘʏ ᴇɴᴅɪɴɢ, ᴇᴍᴏᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ʜᴜʀᴛ/ᴄᴏᴍꜰᴏʀᴛ, ʀᴇᴜɴɪᴏɴꜱ, ᴍᴀᴋɪɴɢ ᴏᴜᴛ/ɢᴇɴᴛʟᴇ ᴋɪꜱꜱɪɴɢ, ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ ɪꜱ ɪᴍᴘʟɪᴇᴅ ᴛᴏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʟᴏɴɢ ʜᴀɪʀ, ᴇᴄʜᴏ ɢᴇᴛꜱ ᴀʟʟ ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ʜᴇ ᴅᴇꜱᴇʀᴠᴇꜱ!

➼ ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ ☆ 3.7ᴋ

➼ ᴘᴏᴠ ☆ ᴛʜɪʀᴅ ᴘᴇʀꜱᴏɴ

➼ ꜱᴏᴜɴᴅᴛʀᴀᴄᴋ ☆ ʜᴇᴀᴠʏ ᴡᴀᴛᴇʀ/ɪ’ᴅ ʀᴀᴛʜᴇʀ ʙᴇ ꜱʟᴇᴇᴘɪɴɢ - ɢʀᴏᴜᴘᴇʀ, ʟɪᴋᴇ ʀᴇᴀʟ ᴘᴇᴏᴘʟᴇ ᴅᴏ - ʜᴏᴢɪᴇʀ, ɪ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅɴ’ᴛ ᴀꜱᴋ ʏᴏᴜ - ᴄʟᴀɪʀᴏ, ꜱᴏꜰᴛ ᴄᴜʀʀᴇɴᴛꜱ - ᴀʟᴇxᴀɴᴅʀᴀ ꜱᴀᴠɪᴏʀ

⋆ ★ ᴏʜ ᴍʏ ɢᴏᴅ ɢᴜʏꜱ ɪᴍ ᴀ ᴛʀᴜᴇ ᴀᴏ3 ᴀᴜᴛʜᴏʀ ɪ ᴜꜱᴇᴅ ᴀ ʜᴏᴢɪᴇʀ ꜱᴏɴɢ ᴀꜱ ᴍʏ ᴛɪᴛʟᴇ ʟᴍᴀᴏᴏ. ɴᴏᴛ ʙᴇᴛᴀ'ᴅ, ʟᴏᴡ-ᴋᴇʏ ɪɴꜱᴇᴄᴜʀᴇ ᴀʙᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ɪᴛ ᴛᴜʀɴᴇᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ ʙᴜᴛ ᴡᴛᴠ, ᴋɪɴᴅᴀ ʙʀᴏᴋᴇ ᴍʏ ᴏᴡɴ ʜᴇᴀʀᴛ ᴄᴜᴢ ᴍʏ ꜱᴡᴇᴇᴛ ʙᴀʙʏ ᴇᴄʜᴏ :((((( ʜᴏᴘᴇ ʏᴏᴜ ᴇɴᴊᴏʏ 🤍

⋆ ★ ʀᴇᴀᴅ ᴏɴ ᴀᴏ3 ⋆*･ﾟ ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ ꜰᴏʀᴍ

“We can make this work.”

The room instantly stills with her insistence; a claustrophobic air of expectation surrounds Echo as her eyes, the eyes he thought he’d never see again, look at him like he is the same person she fell in love with.

The same man who proudly showed off his ARC kit and flexed his muscles jokingly because of a lame tip Fives had given him. Who made out with her a couple of corridors away from General Skywalker, so enraptured in their heavy petting they didn’t even notice when he’d banged on the door for them to get out. The same man who kissed her goodbye for the last time before going off the citadel on a life-risking mission.

How can she not see that the person standing in front of her isn’t the Echo she used to love?

Damp eyes plead silently and she takes a small step forward, reaching out her arms almost like she wanted to engulf him in a warm embrace. But Echo steps away and oh-so softly shakes his head, all to ease her down gently. 

She tilts her head; he can't stop himself before he's grimacing. 

Kriff, does his heart want to break; it wants to shatter. He can’t bear the thought of what he has to tell her. Not when she’s even more beautiful than before, incredibly pained yet exponentially mature with the years of his absence etched onto her face.

She looks exhausted, awaiting any moment she'll be allowed to retire. Not just his death, but the lives of so many of his brothers have weighted her back, turned her into another tragic story of Atlas. Echo can't dare imagine adding more for her to carry on her shoulders.

“No, cyare, I don’t think you understand,” Echo tells her, eyes darting from his hands to her face. “I’m- I’m not the trooper you met all those years ago.”

Her face contorts, eyebrows pushing together with her head tilted to the side. He grunts in frustration at the back of his throat, squeezing her hand softly for emphasis as he talks.

“Just look at me,” He pleads. “I’m more karkin’ battle droid than human. You- You don’t want me.”

It’s unsettling, how she looks at him. Still lovestruck in a fantasy even after what he's said. Echo cranes his neck.

“It–” His voice dies when the first word forces itself out; he grunts softly and scrunches his eyes, trying to compose his thoughts better. It's overwhelming; never in a thousand years did he think this would happen. That he’d be in her apartment again; that he’d get to see her again. And that she’d still want him.

“It isn’t fair on you,” He finally manages to say.

The expression on her face Echo isn’t able to read. He used to be so good at telling what she was thinking.

Now she perplexes him; just like everything else in this new life of his.

“Why-why would you think you’re not good enough for me?” How her voice sounds more choked than his, Echo isn’t sure; but it still seizes his heartbeat all the same.

He hadn’t noticed before, but her hands have slowly separated themselves from where they held his and reached up, hovering over his face, shaking slightly in the air as she waits for his permission to continue. He gives it, nonverbally, with a dip of his chin, despite everything supposedly logical in his head saying he shouldn’t allow it.

As her hand cups his cheek, elegant and warm against his skin, he grimaces painfully with a creased brow.

“Because–” He begins, losing his argument the longer he thinks it over. “I said it already. None of this is fair on you.”

“What’s ‘this’?” She responds immediately. To anyone else, she might’ve seemed confused, an ignorant, greedy, and impatient lover who isn’t listening to him. But in her presence again, he picks up on her little mannerisms, her patterns of behavior. It’s a comforting sensation. One of familiarity.

Will he learn how to read her mind again? Only time can tell him, Echo promptly concludes.

“This body,” He responds without a single stammer. Echo wants to look her in the eyes and give her the assurance she needs, but instead, they dart back and forth with uncertainty.

“This life with me, this–“ He groans, the back of his throat dry. “We can’t be normal, cyare.”

A meek ‘pfft’ noise falls past her lips, eyes fluttering up and down in what seems as though a measly attempt at an eye roll.

“We’ve never been normal,” She responds.

Echo frowns far too automatically. Tragically? in part, she isn’t wrong. Allowing yourself to fall for a soldier and let him into your life isn't easy, even for the most tough-willed. Nights when he'd return bloodied and bruised unearth themselves from his clouded memory, and fragments of moments where she'd try to muffle her quiet sobs of relief, wiping away her tears as he held her tight in his arms recur beside them. She constantly lived with a fear he'd never return, and even that came true. His shoulders heave.

“Maybe we haven’t, but-but you know what I mean,” he persists with complete seriousness. She tugs her bottom lip between her teeth. “I can’t give you the life you deserve.” He gestures to the space around them, the space between them. “One with the perfect, handsome husband and a family and a house.”

When she shrugs, leaning in further and cupping his cheek, he holds back the wry face he wants to flash; she pushes him backward, further into her room, closer to the bed; he still has her layout memorized and etched into his retention. It's one of the only things that the Separatists didn't extract from his brain.

"I don't want 'perfect,'" She makes air quotations in the air as she says that, thinking of the ideal life Echo had illustrated for her. "I want you. I want you just as much as I did before."

He frowns.

"Even with all this?" A hand hovers over hers, gesturing for her to look, really look at the body he has, the metal and the circuits and the superficialness of it all. She gazes for a moment before looking up again. 

"If I'm to be completely honest..." She begins, moving so their chests are so close to touching, so close to pressing together so they become one person again, one entity of pure love and adoration. Perhaps those feelings can be revoked unchanged, an optimistic shadow of Echo hopes. "It makes me love you more."

Before he can beg the question how?, she's already continuing. Her other hand reaches up and cups his face endearingly.

"It shows everyone, even me, how strong you are," She marvels innocently, yet undeniably heartwarming. A sting of pain stakes throug his stomach. "My brave ARC trooper who went through and hell and back, and still came back just as wonderful."

His gaze drifts down again; somehow, her words make him even more terrified of looking into her eyes. What if, one day, she looks into his eyes, and doesn’t see that? Sees what he does, a broken figment of a man, a clone who failed his purpose, a soldier who can’t follow orders, no matter how hard they try. And then all this love he’s undeservingly graced with will be gone in just an instant. How selfish of him.

"Just as wonderful..." She still continues. "Just as handsome."

His eyebrows push together, and she pulls him down to kiss where his creases meet; she is a splendor of honey and healing between them in ways he never knew possible. Echo's eyes widen suddenly when he feels her lips against his, for the first time in what felt like a thousand eternities. Something in that moment is stilled; and for a fraction, everything is good. Everything is perfect.

"You're beautiful, Echo," She whispers against him. Her forehead comes to rest where he dips down. His eyes are still closed, but he can picture how she might look quite well. Eyes filled with adoration and hope, hope he so desperately wants her to share with him. 

"How-" He begins, choking slightly; his eyes shut harder. If he focuses hard enough, he can't feel her touch; the touch he feels so undeserving of. "How can you say that so easily?"

There’s a thin, unmeaningful pause in the air.

"It's second nature," She responds effortlessly. Her hand strokes his cheek, slowly lulling him to open his eyes and look, don't think, just look. "And because I love you."

And at that moment, he falls apart. Something in him, his lungs perhaps, collapses under the sudden pressure he's pulled into. It's a type of pressure he wants to be under, no doubt about it–he wants to be loved, to be held like this no matter what the sensible part of him thinks–but it remains a slow, painful strangling. 

His eyes shut close again and a sob ruptures at the back of his throat, thyroid straining. He leans into her without thinking of the crushing weight– not a step he consciously realizes he's taken, but one nonetheless. Her hands hold his face entirely; how she can be so incredibly firm and keep him so steady, Echo doesn't understand. None of this he can fully comprehend.

Another sob is ripped out of him.

"I never thought I'd see you again," Echo tells her, hushed and sorrowful between two quiet sniffles. "Your voice- I used to play the sound of your voice every day."

"I know, I know," She whispers back, nodding as he talks. Echo isn't lost entirely to pick up on how the words don't match her feelings; she didn't know, and her heart bounds to be swelling with overwhelming adoration. He knows hearing this means the entire galaxy to her; she missed him so, so much.

Why does he feel so much pain then?

He peels open his eyes, blinking away the litter of tears over his face, and allows himself to encircle her waist; they're already so close, and why Echo feels so nervous to simply touch her is puzzling

The softness in her eyes is something powerful. More powerful than a lightsaber-wielding Jedi or the most prepped battleship. Any remaining tolerance he has left completely dissolves under waves of matured, pained, yet beautiful love. Because he can’t deny how much he loves her. How much she makes him feel. That’s a power the Separatists will never have on him. 

"Stay the night?" She then asks gently, caressing his cheek. Echo gulps hoarsely as he realizes how long he’d been holding his breath, then nods desperately. 

"–If you'll allow me."

-

She's been in the `fresher for forty-five minutes now.

Told him to 'Get comfortable, I'll be out soon,' and 'You've slept over so many times before, don't feel like a guest,' but he sits stiff atop of the bed, still in denial that this is home. That it's still home after forced abandon. An oh-so-familiar feeling he hasn’t felt in so long rushes through him; its not as comforting as he’d hope it’d be.

Echo can hear her breathing, her soft humming of a lullaby she once confided that her mother always used to sing to her. The same one she sang lowly into his ear when he woke up in a cold sweat, silent tears streaming down his cheeks as he held her and crooned to him like a sickly child. 

Nightly tire seeps into his eyes, heaves his chest and Echo allows himself to breathe all the way down to his stomach. His lungs feel metallic, just as robotic as the rest of him as he awaits her to come out again. She never takes this long. At least, she never used to. Always efficient and makes so well with her time to keep her water and electric bills down.

Anxieties sweep through. She doesn't want to leave. Can't bear to see him sitting there on her bed again. She regrets her decision. She doesn't love him, she never did, she never will, she...

The door opens. She peaks through her head, a pleading softness etched into her.

"Echo?" She calls out to him.

"Yeah?" Her eyes scan him up and down, and Echo realizes how misplaced he looks. He hasn't sat down completely on the bed yet, his hands on his thighs and his posture perfectly composed, comfortably uncomfortable and so out of place. At least that's how he feels.

"Would you please brush my hair?"

A fond memory rushes through like a wave of warm water. She hates brushing her own hair. Always whines as she tries to untangle all the knots and always asks him to do it for her. The faintest smile graces Echo’s features.

“Of course, cyare.”

She grins softly. He tilts his head slightly.

“What?” He asks, incredulous.

“I missed your voice so much,” She recalls with a nostalgic glint in her eye. “The way you called me cyare.” 

His only response is a soft grunt of agreement; he feels the exact same way. He missed the way her voice wrapped around a note, let out a laugh discreetly when she shouldn’t have been amused, hold onto a gasp or relief when he came through the door bruised and bloodied. Everything about it lost in the cryochamber and restored the moment he sits face to face with her now.

Swiftly, he beckons her over and lets her sit beside him, turning her back to him and handing him the brush. The moment he takes it and lets it sift through her hair, the softest moan is coerced out of her lips and she leans back into his touch.

Wordlessly, he continues to brush her wet hair. There's a level of intimacy that can't be reached with skin against skin, heavy pants as he roots himself deep inside of her; they can't reach this level of trust, where her back can be turned against her and allowed to control her vanity. Even after going through hell and back disheveled–half a man, she puts her reliance in him without hesitation.

“I missed this,” He admits in a hushed, almost shameful exhale.

A soft chuckle comes out of her. Somehow, she sounds disbelieved.

”Putting up with my little hissy fits about my hair?” She jests.

He answers with full certainty.

”More than you’ll ever know, cyare.”

She sighs delicately.

”Have I ever told you how much I like that nickname?” She asks.

Echo tilts his head, stopping his hand movements for a split second.

”Cyare?”

She nods.

”I remember the first time you called me that like it was yesterday.”

Echo hums under his breath, continuing to brush her hair. He rakes his brain for the memory she seems to remember so well, eyebrows knitting in focus.

”…I’ve forgotten.”

She nods again, void of maliciousness.

“I was completely wasted at 79’s,” She retells the story for him.  “‘Was wobbling and knocking things over. You walked me home and made sure I was okay… and called me that when you were helping me up.”

The image comes to him. Her loopy smile as he attempts to wrap her arm over his shoulder, trying not to enjoy her helplessness too much as he helps her get up and leave 79’s, muttering into her ear softly, ‘Let’s get you home, cyare.’

”…I remember now,” Echo says.

Her hair shifts, head perking up.

”Oh?”

Echo mutters a soft ‘yeah,’ struggling to simultaneously grab all of her hair into a hand and brush it into the palm with the scomp link on his other arm. Even when he tries to do something from his life before, things have changed. Made menially more difficult.

”You asked me to kiss you at your doorstep…” He continues the story, a melancholic tone of recall plaguing him before he can stop himself.

Her head tilts again. It’s making it more difficult for him to brush her hair better, but he doesn’t mind.

”And you said no because I was drunk and not in my right mind…” She fills in the next sentence.

”…And I thought you would regret it the next day," He finishes, running a hand through her hair with finality. She turns her head, wrapping all of her neatly brushed hair to a shoulder and giving him a soft grin.

”I hope you know I wouldn’t have," She says.

He nods, allowing himself to soften further into the bed, borderline beamish.

“Still wouldn’t have kissed a drunk girl.”

The room basks in her sunlit smile. She leans in, wrapping her arms around his neck and resting on his shoulders, and Echo doesn't flinch. He expected to, with how wary and uncertain and unworthy he felt (and still feels) in her mere presence, but he doesn't flinch and it's so damn relieving he wants to cry in a mixture of joy and pain. Kriff, doesn't she look perfect, he dares to think. Isn't everything about her just... perfect. What did I do to deserve her?

She leans in further, pulling him down to meet her in the middle, their foreheads pressing against each other firmly. Her starry eyes carry unrealistic visions but he loves the dream inside them. She smiles, a breathy exhale shared between the little space they share, and she shakes her head without real purpose.

”Ever the gentleman," She mutters.

Echo's the one to make the final motion. He plunges down and captures her bottom lip between his, not even hesitating to embosom her waist with his hand. The upward curl of her lips is so prominent against his mouth; a sickly sweet happiness seeps and exudes off of her and into him. It flows through his veins, seizes his heart for a moment and Echo can't help but gasp. But it's swallowed by her own kiss. They both enrapture each other.

Even then, they revel in the languid motions they can take. Selfishly, Echo decides he wants more of her. All of her, if she'll allow it. He sucks in her bottom lip, parting his and swiping his tongue over hers in the way he always used to do, the way that made her squeak softly in a breathy gasp. She makes the sound again and his life is made in an instant.

The dam waters can’t be held back anymore; worldly anxieties no longer tether him to realism. All that matters is the two of them and the pure love they can have.

Echo squeezes her waist firmly and she breaks away with a smile.

”Didn’t think you’d do that,” She says lowly into his mouth. He only shrugs because her assumption may have been correct; he wasn’t expecting to kiss her.

“Me neither,” He admits aloud. She chuckles silently before kissing him again, making him crane his back to fully reach her the way he wants to. Something in him has been carnally ignited when she lets him hold her and kiss her like this; a feeling he hadn’t experienced in what felt like an eternity since he last saw her is unearthed. He needs all of it; needs all of her again.

He adjusts the two of them, moving her knees to spread her legs apart, and places himself between them; he beckons her to the center of the mattress, his scomp link aside and leaning on his elbow. His hand creeps up her neck into the back of her hair, grounding her into place as Echo allows himself to take.

But when she sighs and her eyes flutter close, he pulls away.

”Does it stand?” The words come out so softly and without structure, Echo is sure she didn’t mean for it to come out.

”What do you mean?” He asks after a moment.

”Is… does it stand the test of time?” Her hands hover over his shoulders now, fingers tentatively and timorously resting on thin air. She's gesturing to the two of them, talking about how this feels, how she feels, if it's okay, if he's satisfied; she treads just as carefully as he did just a few moments before. “The- the test of change?”

What test? The question wishes to beg in his mind. But it doesn't because Echo feels the tug as well. The claustrophobic worry that his anxieties inevitably are true; she won't want him the moment their lips meet again. 

"It does for me," He takes a leap into faith. He could carry the same fears and insecurities dear to his chest, or he could look into her eyes and see for himself how she feels. He does; he wants to cry.

She looks so happy. Her eyes crinkling at the corners and her lips spread wide into a blinding smile, she holds her chest softly, as if beckoning for her heart to still. She lets out a small sigh of respite, lifting her arms again to pull him down. When she kisses him, it's drowning in reverence. Drowning in relief.

"Me too," She whispers against his mouth, before seizing his lips again. His eyes scrunch hard against her, as if he’s trying hard to imagine a different world where they can be like this forever. He creates it almost effortlessly. The tenseness in his muscles weaken.

Since Echo was rescued, his chest has ached. His whole body reacted poorly to the prosthetics, each step painful and unworthy of existence. It's slowly subsided, but he feels the ache's hold on him weaken even more. Her simple touch fills empty sockets of his being; so violently stripped of him before, now returned in loving arms.

In the split moments, in their faint beautiful existence, he falls in love again. He kisses her and holds her tight and whispers how damn bad he missed her. The world narrows into a space only the two of them can fit, a galaxy where they can love each other in absolute peace and solitude.

Like real people do.

dividers by @saradika ~ tags: @starstofillmydream @pb-jellybeans @corrieguards @badbatchbabe @ladytano420 @jediknightjana @sleepycreativewriter @shinyshayminflower @thebahdbitch

[atomicradiogirl]

welcome to my TED talk about the beauty of the loki soundtrack and how natalie holt is proving the theory that it’s all about mobius and loki (lokius):

obviously let’s start with the piece ‘lokius’ which we know my thoughts on but this sets up the overall theme of this discussion. in a general summary of my previous TED talk, i claimed that lokius is all about mobius since the piece is mainly composed of his musical theme and the fact that he was literally jealous and discrediting sylvie and loki in that scene. it was all about him in that moment. but they could have easily left this theme as is.

however, natalie holt goes on to repurpose and interpolate the ‘lokius’ musical theme throughout the season 2 soundtrack especially in the show’s finale which is the culmination of loki’s arc. loki and mobius’ relationship grew over season 2 to the point where the last person who ever saw and truly saw loki was mobius.

in the score ‘complex and many’ in loki and mobius’ final goodbye scene, it’s a variation of ‘lokius’ that plays, not anything else. no other score of this magnitude plays when he says goodbye to anyone else, not even sylvie. this is the pivotal emotional climax because loki and mobius’ relationship is the core and heart of the show and to his character. loki would not have been able to sacrifice himself nor have the compassion to do it without mobius. loki gave mobius the choice to live and find his glorious purpose but the show ends with mobius waiting, letting time pass, because he’s alone now just like loki. so he’ll wait for loki to return.

this brings me to the score ‘purpose is glorious’ the final montage sequence in the loki finale. it’s such a beautiful score and it plays over everyone finding their purpose except for mobius who the score cuts out right as we see him stand in front of his sacred timeline home watching his true self play with his children. everyone finds purpose except for mobius. but the piece takes from ‘lokius.’ everyone found purpose because of mobius and his love and care for loki, except for mobius. which is the tragic irony.

finally we talk about the final score in the show, ‘history is now’ which takes elements from ‘loki’s green theme’ and ‘lokius.’ don’t believe me? the underlying violins in the ‘history is now’ is like ripped right from the violins in ‘lokius.’ and ‘history is now’ is the final time we see loki and mobius. mobius letting time pass, loki accepting his glorious purpose.

so in conclusion, it’s always been about mobius and for mobius. it’s always been lokius’ story. even since season one. and the loki soundtrack ITSELF proves this. don’t believe me? just listen.

[midlandslady]

So let me say this:

Geeta Patel wrote season 1 episode 8. That was one of my fave episodes ever! Viserys wishing for one last dinner with the entire family (poor Daeron LOL), Viserys so weak and frail entering the throne room to defend his beloved daughter (*forever emotional*), Daemon running from his spot to help Viserys to get on the throne and putting the crown on his head was so beautiful, Daemon cutting Vaemond's head for calling Rhaenyra a whore (most sexy moment in the entire show), the dinner with the family when Viserys begged for them to put aside their hatred and resentment because he loved them all and wished for them to be happy after his death (cries).

Geeta Patel wrote season 2 episode 3. What did we get in episode 3? Young Rhaenyra calling Daemon as soon as he steps in Harrenhal, Daemon crying for seeing young Rhaenyra with baby Jaeherys (again one of my favourite scenes in the entire tv show), Daemon in front of the weirwood trees and Alys telling him he will die there (poetic foreshadowing), Rhaenyra trusting that Daemon will give them an army if they allow him more time. Rhaenyra talking to Alicent in the same spot where they used to be friends and console each other (beautiful parallel). This is what I remember from episode 3. Did something else happen? Probably, I don't remember. Not to say that I don't care because I don't hate the greens (just Criston Cole most days and Aemond although he also intrigues me). Even Aegon is a very pitiful person. I find the entire story very tragic. And this episode touched my heart.

What else is Geeta Patel going to write? Season 2 episode 8 (season finale!!!!) And you know what she said to the interviewer?

"The other thing I got to set up that of course will pay off later is Daemon arrives to Harrenhal, and this is a new chapter for Daemon. This is where he will shift. He will for the first time look within himself... Harrenhal is a metaphor for what's inside Daemon's heart. In Episode 2, Rhaenyra pushed him away, and Rhaenyra is the first person he's ever really let into his heart and let his guard down with, and when he did she hurt him in Episode 2. She basically told him he was worthless, and so now his armor is on as he enters Harrenhal, but truthfully within his heart, the armor is shattered. So that's where the setup starts, and it will keep evolving until we get to Episode 8."

What does this sound like to you? To me, it sounds like music to my ears. Daemon's arc will pay off later... as in he will become a better person? Recognize his mistakes? Understand that Rhaenyra was right and deserves better (arguably but I will get there in a later post) and reconcile with her? Oh my!

He let his guard down when he let Rhaenyra in his heart and she hurt him 🥺 (he deserved it, kind of, I don't know if he deserved to hear that at the time but he surely deserved to hear it at some point).

His armor is on when he enters Harrenhal but within his heart, the armor is shattered!!!! 😭*pain*

I have always said that Daemon is one of the people who feels more deeply everything but he wears an iron mask, he puts up walls so high and hides his feelings through violence so no one can see how much he is hurting on the inside. I relate with that and maybe that's why I always understood him, always tried to see him between the lines of what he says or how he acts.

More than anything I want him to do the right, he doesn't need to be good, he can be flawed as we all are, but I want him to become a better man. His arc will keep evolving until episode 8 so we will see more hallucinations and more craziness but then one of these hallucinations will make him "shift" and I desperately want to see which one and how it happens.

I don't know if any of you watched Once Upon a Time but Emma and Killian were another of my 3 main OTPs and from the moment I saw Killian/ Hook I also envisioned the potential to be a great man. And I felt the same with Daemon from the first moment (of course it's GoT, so everything is more barbaric and ruthless but the essence is there).

Just please I hope he doesn't make more serious mistakes, so far he's not learning much with the visions, he is still committing war crimes to innocent people ("Do your worst, ser Willem." "Some things the crown should not be seen doing" - seriously? As if it won't backfire right away -_-), still clinging to the "I am the better fit to rule".

But these next 2 episodes will be crucial.

My last warning: Alys, stay away from him!

[carefulfears]

knowing you, you have probably talked about it before but i’d really love to know what you think about mulder’s savior/sacrificial lamb complex. i think it was csm that mentioned in amor fati that mulder’s hero complex would be the end of him one way or the other and it always reminds me of this essay “the gods show up” where the “tragic hero” is described as a human who’s by fate already dead, but keeps talking and trying for the sake of something bigger anyway (aka that post where you said mulder belongs to scully but that just ends up being the reason for her hurt because he also belongs to something bigger that doesn’t care for his well being). strangely it also reminds me of that interview where dd said “mulder is a guy who has been given the problems as jesus” lol.

this is such a beautiful question...the first thing that you have to understand is that i genuinely view fox mulder as a benevolent second coming of christ and every written word stems from the point of view of its author, so. the second is that i think duchovny had an understanding of the character that made that story/franchise what it was and his description of a "profoundly human model of christ" in writing the base-work of amor fati (a conflict between larger purpose and desire for normal life) is as unironically insightful as it is extremely funny. the third is that when mr. x shoves mulder against the wall of the hospital garage in one breath and tells him "i used to be you. but you're not me, mulder, i don't think you have the heart" - it's as much endorsement as it is damnation.

if you look at these two quotes from the amor fati dream

CSM to mulder: "You've suffered enough - for the X-Files, for your partner, for the world. You're not Christ. You're not Prince Hamlet. You're not even Ralph Nader. You can walk out of this hospital and the world will forget you."

and later, mulder to diana: "I have commitments-- to the X-Files, to Scully, to my sister."

CSM is meant to be playing the role of the literal last temptation, the snake-like figure that has to lead his prey astray. but those three things that mulder still has his sights on (the x-files, scully, samantha) are three things that nobody else is dedicated to. nobody else is going to keep those cases open and search for answers and care about those victims. nobody else is scully's partner: working with her, looking after her, fighting with and for her. nobody else is inspiring her. nobody else is remembering his sister, missing her, looking for her. the mother that leaves him in a hospital room in this episode, is burning last signs of life a few chapters later.

i've seen people argue that the problem with this episode and its larger arc is that "CSM is right and the episode thinks he's wrong" but i don't think he is right. i don't think he thinks he's right. i think he's doing a job and mulder is doing a job, both playing their roles, and his thesis is that mulder has done "enough" and suffered "enough" for his list of commitments- but what's enough when no one is gonna tag you out? when the speaker is waiting for a clear shot? (i'm reminded here of one of my favorite audries fic lines: "he sits on the bed, the line of his shoulders going curved and uneven. even hercules would have dropped the weight of this world.")

which is all to say (and remember my point#1 at the top), that i wouldn't describe mulder's "savior complex" as even really being a complex, i think it's just the world. i used to talk about sometimes how moving it is to me that mulder was born into this world and was always going to die for this cause and the story is about people who choose to follow. who have every opportunity available to them and want to do this work at any cost. who won't leave him in it alone, at any cost.

it's scully at the end of the road saying that she would do it "all over again."

it's skinner's "if given the choice between advancing my career by being blindly loyal to some faceless puppeteers pulling strings from the shadows, or to throw in with you two, make no mistake about it. i'd make the same decision every single damn time."

and anon i really love that quote you shared, which is from the gods show up by michael kinnucan: "The center of every tragedy is the image of a human being who has already died but keeps talking, someone whose face is a mask."

which, as you alluded, is what i define as the tragedy of mulder's character. that he was always going to die for the cause he was born into ("there is no other version of this story") and perhaps more tragic: that people depend on him, at any cost. that scully dedicates her life to someone who will list her as his tethering responsibility, but who doesn't belong to her. cannot be predominantly responsible to her, of her. harsh punishment for fruitful crimes.

[proudfreakmetarusonikku]

sorry before I go to bed I’m thinking bout the different ways Evangelion portrays csa.

asuka's (metaphorical) rape is done by a stranger. someone she doesn’t know. a literal monster. as someone who’s always prided herself on being able to fight, being able to always win, this shatters asuka, who feels such a thing makes her weak. she responds to her trauma by regressing, playing video games at her friends house and speaking to her like a young child, before shutting down entirely to the point of attempted suicide. she’s later sexually abused by shinji, taking his own trauma out on her, and while we don’t see as much of how that effects her, we see the tragedy of the cycles of abuse play out.

shinji's sexual abuse is done by a friend. he doesn’t realise it’s wrong, and misato thinks she’s helping, because he’s a boy and boys like that right? but misato not realising the harm of her actions do not make her any less harmful. there’s a lot of complicated feelings and emotions there, and it very much deals heavily with the complexities of abuse- not all abusers realise what they’re doing. not all abusers even have sexual intent (misato absolutely doesn’t see shinji in a romantic light at all, she's not attracted to him). not all victims hate their abusers, and not all victims fully realise how inappropriate their abusers actions are. yet, the abuse still has impacts- as seen with shinji's complete lack of sexual boundaries, to the point of assaulting asuka for a desperate sense of control. he recognises that it’s awful- it’s something familiar to him to a degree- but as a severely traumatised child, he lashes out and inflicts his own pain on others. which is not acceptable, obviously, but it’s tragic, and shows how abuse makes people worse.

and as for rei, she's abused by her own father. the signs are there, but they don't entirely click at first, and neither do they click to the adults who should be looking out for her. the sexual abuse she faces is overlooked even when it’s right under everyone’s noses. and when someone does put the dots together, they blame her for it. rei's abuse, like a lot of familial abuse, is either ignored or something she’s considered at fault for, despite being sheltered and groomed all her life, and, y’know, fourteen. rei's arc also focuses heavily on her conflicted feelings about her abuser, but in a different way to shinji. she, at first, idolises gendo. she's been groomed her whole life, and is incredibly isolated. what happens is normal to her, she doesn’t see it as wrong because she’s never been told it’s wrong. the idea of not having faith in gendo is alien to her. but as time goes on, she realises what happens isn’t special, it isn’t okay. by the time she dies and another version of her takes her place (the rei's share a soul, so they’re the same person even if rei iii can’t remember everything) she’s quietly furious at the idea of being a doll, and realises she can be more. when her abuser touches her, she literally tears off his hand. and she attains agency! that’s the final part of her storyline. she has agency, for the first time in her life. and she might have chose to listen to shinji on what to do, but she chose for the first time, it’s a massive step and honestly it really struck me as a beautiful ending to her character arc.

idk man. i just like how this mecha anime interrogates a sensitive subject from multiple angles and has genuinely suprisingly good depictions of even abuse that’s not recognised as abuse by most still. it’s nice! it’s refreshing. honestly, they committed to exploring abuse and never trying to apologise for it, and it’s fucking great. i'm personally not a csa victim, but i did go through sexual trauma at around the same ages of these characters, and i found myself relating a lot to their arcs around this due to that even if our experiences are pretty different. i felt aspects of how i dealt with things, especially in rei and shinji but to a degree asuka as well, and it made me feel more confident in myself. if shinji ikari can choose to live, so can I :)

[misstrashchan]

Number 7 for the RWBY ask game!

Yang's "I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!!! CAN EVERYONE JUST CALM DOWN FOR LIKE FIVE MINUTES BEFORE SOMETHING CRAZY HAPPENS AGAIN!" from V1

No super deep reason why I like this one tbh. Often I just find myself repeating this line either in my head or out loud when I feel overwhelmed and stressed out. Idk I just find it cathartic and it's just a good line of expressing anger and frustration in a humorous way when too much is happening all at once.

"Do you believe in destiny?"

The last words said before her death, carrying Pyrrha's legacy. The way it encapsulates Pyrrha's arc and her struggle with agency and existentialism. The way it continues to haunt the narrative, especially for Cinder and Jaune's characters, makes it one of the most iconic lines of the show.

"This must be really hard on her too"

I have literally written an entire meta on why I love this line.

"Some things are more important, I think. Keeping our humanity."

I absolutely adore the humble and honest defiance Oscar's line has in the face of Ironwood's "we have to do whatever it takes to stop Salem, nothing matters more". It's also really when you see Oscar coming into his own and finding himself, starting to find and assert his own beliefs (...though you can clearly see Ruby's inspiration and influence shining through *gestures to her "so all those times you talked about having faith in humanity... That was just for everyone else?"). Because Oscar is trying to believe in Ironwood's humanity. And in his own, in the face of the merge. He pays for it dearly and yet that belief of his doesn't falter, and we see it again with how he believes in Oz, Hazel and Emerald. And what he says here really is at the heart of what will lead to them saving the day I think, in the same vein as Ruby and Maria's conversation about the Silver Eyes not being about destroying monsters, but preserving humanity and life.

"She's not protecting me. And I'm not protecting her. We're protecting each other"

If Blake and Yang facing against Adam again and holding hands wasn't enough to drive me wild and giddy, this line does. So much growth in Blake and Yang's relationship culminating in their confrontation with Adam, especially with this line. Letting go of matyr complexes, and instead coming together as equals to mutually uplift and support each other, so neither has to suffer alone or feel infantalised or overshadowed as the protector or protected, instead growing beyond that into something stronger and more beautiful, the moment their love truly began to blossom.

"You atlas elites are all the same! you think hoarding power means you'll have it forever, but it just makes the rest of us hungrier. And I refuse to starve."

I love this line for the feral energy it has, the raw drive and ambition Cinder has that it bleeds far past desire and into a need, a desperation. It carries so much weight with it, the foreshadowing for Cinder's backstory as a slave girl trampled and abused by atlas elites, literally starved for food, affection and agency. I really love the way the hunger motif in general is used. On top of that it makes the foiling between Winter and Cinder very apparent

"Without you I am nothing, but because of you I am everything"

Honestly up there as another one of the most iconic lines of the show. It's said in a a moment of rebellion and triumph by Cinder over her abuser, but simultaneously is tragic in how Cinder is essentially defining herself by the abuse and pain she endured. Fully expecting this line to resurface in a moment with Salem, but with the original meaning turned on its head.

"Maybe there was something you just weren't seeing" I also wrote another whole ass meta about why I love this line

also shoutout to Ilia's "Quit taking pot shots and FIGHT ME LIKE YOU MEAN IT!" and "I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE TO DO! I don't know what else to do..." purely for Cherami Leigh's brilliant performance in delivering such raw and emotional lines.

Ozpin's fear speech is pretty great too.

There's another line from V9 that's one of my favorites too, but I know you haven't watched V9 yet so I'll tell you that one later :)

[lunareiitic]

CANTO 4 SPOILERS BE WARNED

I think it's really interesting (and clever) that we're a third of the way through Limbus' plot (theoretically. 12/4 = 3 after all) and we've split the focus characters in half based on who is actually growing because of their Canto and who isn't, while also showing multiple narrative ways to show that progression (or lack thereof).

Gregor and Rodya have already done their growing. Gregor's a war veteran whose traumatic past should be long behind him, and his character didn't shift after his Canto. His refusal with regards to the whole Yuri thing wasn't a shocking twist, it was the culmination of years of rejecting the life that his mother made for him.

Rodya rejects the idea that she has to develop as a character entirely. Canto 2 is mostly a celebration of Rodya- she makes her own luck and doesn't require these things like "character growth" and "dynamics". She was a one woman wrecking crew then and she's one now, plans and friends be damned. It's why she's able to reject Sonya's olive branch: he's predicating his entire plan on the idea that Rodya would have learned from the Tax Collector Incident. But she didn't, and she knows that.

Sinclair's Canto 3 marks the first Canto where we're actually examining the failings of a member of the team. Sinclair's immaturity, fawn response and unwillingness to take responsibility did directly lead to all of the bad shit that happened to him. Even if Kromer would have done it anyways, Canto 3 takes Sinclair to task for what he did, but in the end, he can't follow through. It's beautiful and tragic that he needs Demian to bail him out of what should have been his cathartic moment of triumph. Sinclair's growing is actively still happening. Canto 3 is only the beginning.

Which brings us to the most recent Canto and Yi Sang. Yi Sang in hindsight is the perfect character to follow up Canto 3 with because Yi Sang is essentially Sinclair if Demian wasn't around. Yi Sang's narrative is about apathy and passive suicidality- he doesn't care what happens to him because life has lost all meaning to him. Sinclair still has some fight in him, all Yi Sang has is ashes. Or so he thinks. Dongrang and Dongbaek are characters who will never move on from their past, despite what both of them think. Yi Sang, through mirroring them, ends up with the most radical character development we've seen so far: true catharsis. Unlike our three previous characters, Yi Sang's Canto manages to get down to the core of his issues and he's able to understand what he must do to get better and does. He conquers Dongbaek (embodiment of rage) and Dongrang (embodiment of despair) and ascends to a place of healing away from them. This is a very conventional, classic character arc structure seen in fiction since the dawn of time, it's classic because it works. But it feels so refreshing and new here in Limbus Company because we waded through three quagmires of difficult regrets, abuses, and traumas that refuse to be handled so easily. Given that our remaining characters are based on murderers (Hell Screen, The Stranger), self-saboteurs (The Odyssey, Moby Dick, Don Quixote, Faust), and the legacy of racism (Wuthering Heights), I'm betting that Hong Lu's might be our brightest spot moving forward. (But who knows. They could give us another goofy Canto out of nowhere like they did in Canto 2. Limbus Company contains multitudes.)

[zukomysweetbabyboy]

This may be a controversial opinion but I'm glad that Azula was the prodigy firebender and not Zuko not just because Aang stumbling upon the prodigies of all the elements is unrealistic and feels cheaper but it was so essential to both Zuko and Azula's character arcs.

I mean, it’s no secret that Azula's character arc did not get the attention that she deserved. But from what we did get, we know that she put a lot (and I mean A LOT) of her self worth in her firebending which isn't surprising because she idolized Ozai and he was fucking useless without bending and, specifically, in being better than Zuko. Azula was the best firebender in the world and inheriting an entire kingdom at FOURTEEN years old. From her father, she was taught that she was safe as long as she was better than Zuko ("You can't treat me like this! You can't treat me like Zuko!"). This meant being sneaky (staying behind in the throne room while Azulon talked to Ozai), being emotionless (teasing Zuko about his grandfather literally ordering his father to kill him - what the fuck baby Azula), being tactful (knowing the answer to the question Ozai asked in the throne room & only speaking in turn), being perfect ("Almost isn't good enough!"), and most importantly: being the best firebender (mastering advanced forms as a child, blue firebending, etc.). She was taught from her mother that these things made her a monster ("My own mother thought I was a monster - she was right of course", "What is wrong with that child"). She was smart enough to know that she couldn’t have the acceptance from both parents, but acceptance from Ozai meant being safe and acceptance from Ursa meant being loved, and to Azula being safe was more important.

This is where the difference between Zuko and Azula starts. Where Azula is all head (being safe > being loved), Zuko is all heart. Zuko didn't understand why his father hated him or why Azula was cold. He was genuine in his love and in his hurt and in his anger. He wasn't good at being the perfect prince, so he couldn't gain acceptance from his father (he couldn't be safe) but he clung to his mother (preferring her company even to Mai and Ty Lee and Azula, who were his age). He internalized what she said in the throne room about his struggling making him strong, and we see him repeat that sentiment throughout the show. Zuko's sense of identity comes from his persistence whereas Azula's comes from her perfection and both of these ideals are trauma responses. It's obvious that it's not healthy for Azula to base her identity around being perfect and It's no wonder she cracked by the end of the series although that should have been handled SO MUCH better - WHERE is the buildup she deserved, Bryke. But it is also not healthy for Zuko to base his identity around struggle, even though this flaw doesn't drive him insane like Azula's perfection and in a fucked up sort of way it is productive to him being a great Fire Lord. Zuko's character arc is well done (maybe the most well done character arc ever, actually) but he finishes the show with a lot of growth left to do.

tldr: Both of their characters relied on Azula being a prodigy and Zuko not being. Azula is all head and Zuko is all heart and their parents pitted them against each other.

p.s. I have SO many thoughts about their dynamic and how canon could have been tweaked just a little bit to make it so beautiful and tragic and compelling, but that will have to be a different post. Also all of the quotes are from memory so if they're wrong oops.

[absolutebl]

This week in BL - I am all over the place, But Laws of Attraction is Phenomenal af

July 2023 Wk 2

Being a highly subjective assessment of one tiny corner of the interwebs. Organized by which ones (in each category) I’m enjoying most.

Ongoing Series - Thai

Laws of Attraction (Thai Sat iQIYI) 1 of 8 - Icky picked it up but it’s not airing for me until Sundays so I held this post specifically to watch and talk about this show. Stars the pair from To Sir With Love with the same production team. IT’S SO GOOD Y’ALL. A morally corrupted trickster lawyer with a tragic past, sad eyes, and a beautiful smile that he uses like a weapon. Meets paladin martial arts instructor from other side of the tracks (who is out, at least to his baby sister). Corrupt police. Spoiled rich kid evil. Ambitious politician. Tragic death. Terrible subs.* This show is very like Manner of Death but so far it is a much better/tighter story. It’s NOT BL but it is fucking phenomenal. And you shoudl watch it. Not wait to binge it. WATCH IT. On a global scale this might be the best thing currently airing featuring gay romantic leads. Its really fucking good. It’s Lawless Lawyer but more complex character motivation and gay af. Fuck yes please and thank you. FINALLY. Triggers for violence, beatings, death & torture depicted on screen. Like MoD they are not holding back.  (* A lot of the familial names they are using are not gendered in Thai but translated as such, like “nephew”. This one is gonna go down a lot easier if you know some Thai.)

Step By Step (Tues WeTV & Gaga) ep 12fin - 2 years pass and no one’s hairstyle changes? Srs. Them meeting again = hella AWKWARD. Both still pining & hurt. NO SINGING. The reconciliation scene was great. I enjoyed that on the “do over relationship” they went with phi/pom (instead of the super formal khuns). So cute and so much more relaxed. Also lots of neck kisses! Charming final ep. It’s only flaw being they dropped the side couple, but I wasn’t really into them anyway. Ultimately? This is what Boss & Babe should have been and could we please have Up lead out another BL? I miss him and he only gets prettier. Full review below.

La Pluie (Sat iQIYI) ep 12fin - I adore the tiny little baby GL thread that we almost got. And I wish we had had more of it throughout the show. The side couple turned out to be good too. Emotional crying kisses are my favorite. Sunshine netted himself an earnest serious romantic boy, we likey. As for the main couple? Well... Tai’s search story arc was dull and dragging in a final ep and it felt bloated and slow as a result. It was a good confession reunion with Tai figuring all of his shit out, not surprising but fine. Kind of a a weak final ep. Full review below. 

Hidden Agenda (Thai Sun GMMTV YouTube) ep 1 of 12 - JoonDunk are back and we have all seen this a million times before, but Thailand never executed a successful formula it didn’t want to repeat a million times over, drunk bathroom and everything. Welcome (back) to Thai BL (and back and back and back). Basically they just added glasses, a new 1-shared-brain-cell friendship group, and different uni departments. Ah GMMTV, forever trying to recreate the magic of 2gether. But also I’m enjoying it. I’m a simple person. (Hi Jamie! Still in college since 2018 I see.) Anyone else notice that Chinese phrase that they did not translate for us? Mmm hum. Cute. Still... NO SINGING. 

Low Frequency (Sat iQIYI) ep 2 of 8 - Thames is in coma and getting slagged off on the socials. It’s moving a bit slowly but the premise is interesting despite the poor quality of the execution. 

Dinosaur Love (Sun iQIYI) ep 3 of 8 eps - Major trigger for self harm depicted on screen in part 2/4. I skipped it. Then there is assault and verbal abuse. I told you Ultimate Troop is NOT to be trusted. 

Be Mine Super Star (Mon Viki) ep 2 of 12 - Look, I don’t really mind this show but I also don’t like second hand embarrassment and I sense a metric butt ton incoming.

Be My Favorite (Fri YouTube) ep 8 of 12 - I was not best pleased with this episode. Ya’ll round the tumblr-sphere seem to be enjoying it but I have officially hit the wall on Kawi. There is not enough booze for me to cope with his shizz. I may be alone in this. But gotta say how I feel... Unlike him. Trash watch here.

Ongoing Series - Not Thai

Tokyo in April is... AKA Shigatsu no Tokyo wa (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 5 of 8 - Poor Ren, he feels compelled to take on the burden of protecting everyone from sexual assault because he blames himself. And he can’t even talk to his boyfriend about it. Oh fuck me the pair of shoes at the door. And neck kisses? TOO MUCH. Argh. Japan. Why must you hurt so good? 

Stay By My Side (Taiwan Fri Gaga) 3 of 10 eps - It’s a very cute show. All the tropes and archetypes with no fuss or attempts to be clever, just executing them (sometimes over and over again). Even hiccoughs as a result of flirting! I haven’t seen that one in ages. The show feels old fashioned as a result. Nostalgic. I’m good with that. 

Tie The Not (Pinoy YouTube) ep 6 of 8 - Sad boys still sad now drunk. (Noooooo shoes on bed! Argh.) Finally kisses! Also good ones for a large portion of this ep. Plus hair pulling. And verse rep! And after sex convo. Then side dishes have a whole proper gay ax covo about top/bottom. Everyone say thank you Philippines! get down with your queer selves! 

Stupid Genius (Vietnam Fri YouTube) ep 6fin - I believe this was the final episode. It was cute. This is a standard sort of semi-crappy VBL high school drama. Enjoyable in its floppy friendliness, weirdly like a queer after school special promoting education. Dead fish kisses but fine for what it is. 7/10 

Minato's Laundromat Season 2 AKA Minato Shouji Coin Laundry Season 2 (Japan Thu Gaga) 2 of 12 eps - Activate cohabitation trope. They okay bfs. Minato not as frustrating this week, but still frustrating for me and Shin. Next week = cute outfits and dumb miscommunication yay!

Vian the series (Vietnam YouTube ) ep 11 of 12 - again it didn’t show up on my dash in time for this. I’ll pop it into next week. 

It’s airing but ...

House of Stars (Thai Mon iQIYI) 12 eps - I bounced at ep 3. Will binge if told it is worth it at end.

Stay (Pinoy YouTube) 7 eps - It’s mostly English & set in LA (shudder) so I’m not bothering.

Stay With Me ... NO I WILL NOT! And you can’t make me.

Ended This Week

Step By Step Series Review  

This was Thailand’s answer to The New Employee, and everything I loved about that show I loved about this one. This was an office romance between stern boss and sweet subordinate that felt more authentic to an office environment than previous Thai BLs of this ilk. And that authenticity added tension to the narrative and character development (how novel). Now that might be because it has western source material, or it might be because it is actually kind of old-fashioned (it’s been years since I worked as an office grunt). I also really enjoyed the brothers’ relationship, and kinda wished they hadn’t attempted (and failed) to give said brother his own side BL. That one flaw made it a 9/10 for me. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

La Pluie Series Review

This BL takes to task the fated mates trope and what it means to have love chained intimately to predestination. It’s about how faith in destiny before choice diminishes the authenticity of emotion, relationships, and connection. This is a high concept to examine through the lens of a BL. By activating + examining the soulmates trope this show is challenging a foundation of romance: the idea that there is one person meant to be your one romantic partner all your life. This means that we, as viewers, spend much of the show worried about it having a happy ending, and that’s the source of both its brilliance and tension: would the narrative have the strength to truly challenge its own romantic core? But, ultimately, all this elevated complexity was executed in a somewhat shaky manner with the narrative derailing into some serious pacing issues and characters manipulated by miscommunication. However, with good chemistry and decent acting all around, plus some excellent high heat and representation of consent and a few other rare tropes, this one has to (like it’s sibling show My Ride) earn a 9/10. I enjoyed it even as it made me think, so despite its flaws: HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Next Week Looks Like This:

Starting:  

7/19 Wedding Plan (Thai Wed YouTube & iQIYI)  - It's Mame and she's coming for our GL. She's such a misogynist IMAGINE what we will get with a GL side dish? It's going to be absolute carnage. To crane your neck as you drive by the car wreck or not? That is the question. Me? I'm wallowing in the guts. Trying to decide to trash watch or not... 

7/20 Jun & Jun (Korea Thu Viki) - From 2022 I CAN’T FUCKING WAIT! So excited for this one. 

2023 forthcoming BL master post (see comments, some are inaccurate, NOT KEPT UPDATED)

THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS

FYI roselle juice is made from hibiscus (a flower) so technically neither a tea nor a juice. (Hidden Agenda)

Tie the Not = all the verse rep this ep. I love this for them. 

The giggling was SO DAMN CUTE (Step by Step, na?) 

We all guessed it but it was still fun. (Stupid Genius) Also miracles of miracles, two actors who actually look like they could be brothers play brothers. 

First time I’ve seen faen translated as significant other. (Laws of Attraction)

THE PAIN! (Tokyo) 

(Last week.)