#no thoughts or motives behind that. just pets or scratches

[jonny-b-meowborn]

I know this is kinda silly and doesn't seem as serious as it is for me but it genuinely hurts me that I can't casually tell people that I'm a therian. I can't even say I'm a furry unless I'm certain I won't be judged. It's becoming an increasingly important part of my identity and I wish I could just tell people "I'm a dog btw ^-^" when I meet them the same way I can tell them I'm queer or an artist or a gamer or whatever. It's just who I am and I hate how it's not really accepted, or even understood by most people

[bearambles]

Okok little request if ur up for it. Just Hamzah x reader (gn if mentioned) where they have a smoke sesh together in his new apartment but reader gets too comfortable and accidentally falls asleep on Hamzah with the cats.

Just pure fluff lmaoo I just can't get the thought out of my head I need to grip his shirt like a child he just looks so comfy :')

Also idc what format it can be headcanon or a small fic, whatever u feel!!

close to you 🎀 (hamzah)

words: 1.1k

warnings: use of weed, making out, fluff, established relationship

note: hi lovelies!! im so sorry for the lack of posts recently - im on vacation and ive had no time or motivation. on the ride home though, im gonna try to catch up to requests!! and im thinking abt writing smut again 🤭

“do you wanna smoke?”

hamzahs head turns from looking at the ceiling to looking at you. he looks almost nervous, his eyes darting across your face like he did the first time he kissed you. you smile at the thought and sit up on his bed.

he’d invited you over to see his new apartment (finally). you’d ended up in his room playing with his new cats, blue and red, who seemed to take a liking to you. blue sits in your lap now, and you scratch behind her ears as you speak.

“like, a blunt?”

he stays laying down, red lying on his chest. he pets her and laughs softly.

“nah, i have a pen. but it’s the same idea.”

he raises an eyebrow, “you have smoked before, right?”

you blush, your face heating up. you look down to the kitty in your lap, and bring both legs up so they’re crossed.

“duh. just like. once or twice in high school, though. and…” you trail off.

“and?” he asks, picking up red in his arms and sitting up next to you.

“i don’t think i did it right. like, i didn’t really feel anything.” you admit

“oh okay. that’s okay. i mean like- if you don’t wanna-“

“no, i do.” you say quickly, “i just - like you’ll have to teach me i guess. that sounds stupid. but the first time was like, a bong and i totally didn’t inhale shit.”

he laughs, and the sound makes you crack a smile, even after embarrassing yourself. he’s wearing his camo hoodie, and his curls are just the perfect amount of messy. one falls into his eyes and he blushes it away with his palm.

“that’s okay, i can show you. though, i don’t know how great a teacher i’ll be.”

he places red in your lap next to blue and gets up from the bed, going to dig through his drawers for his pen. you watch the way he moves, the way his sweatshirt rides up and shows a bit of his back. the way his pants fit. you look away when you catch yourself being a creep.

he finds it and goes to sit in front of you this time, near the end of the bed. he’s closer now, his legs matching yours in a sort of lazy criss-cross. he observes the device in his hands for a second before bringing it to his lips and inhaling.

when he releases the smoke, he tilts his head up and you stare at his neck. the smoke leaves his lips slowly and quickly disappears. he looks back to you and holds it out for you to take.

“it’s gonna die soon so we can just finish it today.” he says as you grab the pen from his hand, “unless you like, go crazy after a few hits.”

you roll your eyes and look at the pen in your hand, before lifting it to your mouth. you look to him for confirmation and he nods, so you deeply inhale like you saw him do.

“okay, now inhale again, and you’ll feel it in the back of your throat.”

you do as he says and feel it - it sort of burns. after a moment you puff out your cheeks and then release the smoke, slow at first. that is until you cough, and the rest comes out.

he laughs and takes the pen from your hand.

“you okay?”

you nod, but keep coughing for a moment. sitting up, you reach your hand out again, wiggling your fingers to ask for the pen back. he raises an eyebrow at you.

“you want it again already.” you nod. “alright, but be careful, for real. don’t do too much just to impress me.”

you give him a look.

“i’m not, i swear. just, lemme try again okay?”

he hands you the pen and you take another hit, this one burning less. you feel it in your head, and you smile as you let out the smoke into his face. he waves his hand to get it away, but he’s laughing.

“thatta girl, hey, you feel good?”

“i feel great.” you say, going in to kiss him. he kisses back and leans forward, wrapping his hands around your waist. you uncross your legs and sit up on your knees.

his mouth is soft and you moan into it as he moves his hands down to the back of your legs, lifting you onto his waist. from there he moves back so he’s up against the bedframe with you in his lap.

it’s like that for the next hour - slow kisses and the pen passed between you two. neither of you suggest anything more despite your closeness (and hamzahs obvious hard-on). there’s a soft sort of feel to the moment.

“i wanna try something.” he says eventually, taking the device from your fingers and moving it to his mouth.

you look at him with curiosity and lean back slightly to watch. he pushes the smoke around in his mouth a bit before taking your face in both of his hands and pulling you close. you open your mouth to kiss him, but he stays just an inch away, and while your lips are parted, blows the smoke into your open mouth.

inhaling it, you smile against his mouth and properly kiss him. you can feel his grin forming too. he deepens the kiss and his hold on your waist tightens.

when he pulls away, his eyes dance across your face and his mouth rests in a lazy smile.

“what?” you ask, regarding his staring problem

“just so…so fuckin pretty.”

you bite your lip to hide your grin and shake your head. your hair is a mess after all that’s happened and your makeup is smeared. still, hamzah seems mesmerized.

you bury your head in his neck for him to hold you. his hoodie smells like the smoke and a bit of his cologne. you breathe in and out repeatedly, smelling him. he smells so good, so safe.

slowly you slump down to lay on his chest. on instinct, his hand reaches to play with your hair, pushing it out of your face.

it’s funny, hamzah never seemed handsy before this. you never considered him someone who likes physical touch - not with friends or even family, mostly. but with you it’s different. he didn’t expect it either, but as soon as he felt your soft skin on his, he never wanted it any other way.

the motion of him stroking your hair makes you sleepy and eventually your eyes drift closed. you sleep for hours - if you had any actual plans for the day you would wake up stressed and anxious. instead, you wake up and see his head above yours, resting against his pillow.

he’s fallen asleep too.

-

i hope you enjoyed! requests are open! >_<

[weirdkpopgirl]

Crushed | Jeno Fic #1 (feat. Jisung)

Title: Crushed

Genre: College AU

Warnings: a love triangle is heavily implied, kissing is involved. reader is little insecure

Word Count: ~14k

Author's Note: Like my other lengthier works, this story took ages to complete. I actually started writing it last year and the motivation to keep going was very slow. But I was determined to finish this story and now it's finally done! I know love triangles are cliché, but I've always wanted to use it in a story. I feel like not many people will be interested in reading this story, but I do hope that those who do will enjoy it. Thank you for reading and please leave comments ^ ^

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~ cats and coffee

“Hyung, Hyung—that’s her!” The younger one exclaimed in a hushed tone, shaking the elder’s shoulder.

Jeno’s eyes shifted upward to you standing behind the counter, donning a barista uniform. Your dark hair was neatly tied in a half ponytail and the round, silver-rimmed glasses added a scholarly charm, partially concealing your features. While your appearance might not be the most striking, there was a soft warmth about you that made others feel at ease.

“Who? (Y/n)?” He repeated, turning back to his friend.

Jisung nodded with a dreamy look in his eyes. “Isn’t she pretty?”

“Yeah I guess so,” Jeno shrugged. “Is she the reason you’ve been coming here so often?”

The younger boy’s cheeks tinged red as he bashfully rubbed the back of his neck. “Maybe…”

Jeno never thought he’d see the day when Park Jisung—who used to run away from any girl who looked his way— had a crush. It felt…weird.

“How do you know her?” Jisung then asked, brows furrowing in curiosity.

Leaning back in his seat, Jeno replied, “She joined Jaemin’s club this year. I volunteer with her at the pet shelter.”

To be honest, Jeno hadn’t paid a great deal of attention to you before. The first time he saw you was during the first week of the semester when you joined the animal volunteer club, which he was a board member for. Aside from first-day introductions, you appeared rather reserved during meetings and often kept to yourself. 

Given Jeno’s own introverted nature, it took some time for him to actually talk to you. Even though he was in his third year of college, he still got shy when it came to meeting new people. In fact, it wasn’t until the two of you were assigned together to work with the cats that you were compelled to become more acquainted. Your shared love for the felines definitely eased the initial awkwardness. Despite this newly formed connection, his interactions with you stayed within the club’s activities.

Jisung gaped at this newfound information. “Seriously? You never told me that before!”

“Well I didn’t know you were interested in her,” Jeno teased, taking a sip of his iced americano. 

Just as they were talking about you, you caught Jeno's eyes and sent a kind smile in his direction. He observed as you exchanged a few words with your coworker and then walked over to their table. 

“Hi Sunbae, sorry for not noticing you earlier,” you apologized sheepishly, briefly adjusting the frames of your glasses.

“No worries. You looked busy over there,” Jeno assured you, before gesturing towards his friend across the table. “This is my friend, Park Jisung, by the way.”

Feeling a bit awkward now that he was in the presence of his crush, Jisung managed a small wave. “Hi,” he mumbled.

The warm smile you kindly offered gradually put him at ease. “Hey, you’re a dance major right?”

“Yeah, how did you know?” The boy’s eyes widened, raising a hand over his mouth in surprise that you recognized him.

You chuckled a hint of bashfulness in your demeanor. “I saw you dance at the freshman retreat. You were so cool, I could never do something like that.”

Observing the blush on Jisung's cheeks intensify, Jeno couldn't help but smirk involuntarily. “Oh—thanks. I’m glad you liked it,” Jisung said shyly, scratching his head. 

You glanced at the clock on the wall, realizing you couldn’t keep talking forever. A part of you felt guilty for having to cut the conversation short. But you also didn’t want to leave your coworker by herself for too long.

“Well, I better get back to work,” you sighed, briefly shifting your focus back at the two boys with a small smile. “I'll see you at tomorrow's club meeting, Sunbae. And it was nice meeting you, Jisung-ssi.”

As you excused yourself, Jeno and Jisung exchanged glances, both wearing smiles that lingered even after she left.

“She’s exactly how I imagined her to be. Kind and sweet,” Jisung said, the dreamy expression returning to his face. “Do you think I have a chance with her?”

Jeno shrugged, lifting his drink again. “Yeah, why not? You should try getting to know her more though.”

“How am I supposed to do that when I get so nervous when she’s around?” Jisung groaned, holding his head in his hands. 

Jeno watched his friend sympathetically, unsure of what to say. It wasn’t like he had much experience with girls either—not because he had some irrational fear of them like Jisung did. In fact, several girls eyed him on campus. But he just wasn’t interested in any of them.

Suddenly, a light bulb went off in Jisung’s head. “Wait, can you help me get with her, Hyung?”

The male across from him raised an eyebrow. “Why me?”

“You said you're in the same club as her. Maybe you could invite her to hang out with us sometime,” Jisung suggested.

“We’re not really that close,” Jeno mumbled, contemplating his friend’s request. He’s never been asked to play the matchmaker role before, so he wasn’t sure if he could do a good job. However, he couldn’t resist the hopeful look in the younger one’s eyes.

“Please do this for me, Hyung. I'll do anything you want!”

The desperation in the boy’s plea caused Jeno to sigh in defeat. “Okay, I guess I can help,” he relented, crossing his arms. “But you have to buy me snacks for the rest of this month.”

Jisung pumped his fist in the air. “No problem! You’re the best, Jeno Hyung.”

Back behind the counter, your eyes flitted in the boy’s direction again. A smile crept on your lips, noticing the animated expressions on Jisung’s face in contrast to Jeno’s calm demeanor. They seemed like really good friends as if nothing could tear them apart. 

Little did they know that their friendship would be tested.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ an accidental start of something

The following Saturday, Jeno spent the afternoon at the pet shelter, where they gladly welcomed their club. He was paired up with you to clean the litter boxes, and you were able to finish the task sooner than expected. With some extra time on their hands, you decided to hang out in the nursery where the playful kittens were waiting.

Jeno observed you affectionately cradling a fluffy black kitten. He couldn’t help but smile at how your eyes lit up joyfully. It always fascinated him to see your reserved demeanor fade away in the presence of something you had great fondness for.

He chuckled when a kitten playfully pawed at the shoelaces on his sneakers. Jeno gently scooped up the little one in his arms.

“That one seems to like you,” you remarked, breaking the silence.

Jeno smiled, softly stroking the cat’s head with his finger. “Yours seems to like you too.”

“I wish I could just take him home with me,” you sighed, leaning over to gently nuzzle your nose against the kitten’s tiny black one. Unfortunately, the dorms didn’t allow pets.

He nodded understandingly, “I know what you mean.”

As the conversation flowed between the two, Jeno decided this was a good time to bring up his friend. “So, what do you think of Jisung?” He asked casually.

A thoughtful expression formed on your face as you placed the kitten in your lap. “He seemed nice. Why do you ask?”

“Well, we’re planning to see a movie tomorrow,” Jeno mentioned, a hopeful glint in his eyes. “And I was wondering if you want to join us?”

You hesitated, your eyes momentarily drifting away from the adorable cat to meet his gaze. “Oh... I wouldn't want to intrude…”

“You wouldn't be intruding,” Jeno reassured a warm smile on his face. “I'm just trying to get Jisung to make more friends his age. That’s all.”

After a moment of pondering, you smiled back. "Sure, I’d love to then.”

For some reason, Jeno didn’t expect you to agree so easily. But this certainly made his job a lot easier. He could already visualize the male’s surprised but excited expression when he learned that you said yes.

════════

Jeno observed Jisung fidgeting nervously, as they stood in the lobby of the movie theater. The younger male kept stealing glances at the door, his excitement mingling with anxiety as they waited for your arrival.

Jisung clutched the popcorn bucket tightly in his hands. “I just can’t believe I'll finally get to hang out with her. What if I end up saying something stupid? Or if I—”

“All you have to do is be yourself and you’ll be fine,” Jeno interjected, putting an end to his friend’s anxious rambling.

Though Jisung nodded in response, he didn’t appear any calmer. Chuckling, Jeno gave him a reassuring pat on the back.

“Relax, Jisung-ah,” he said, “She’ll be here soon.”

As if on cue, you rushed through the front entrance, your hair slightly disheveled and cheeks flushed with haste.  

“I’m sorry for being late,” you exclaimed, trying to catch your breath. “A whole wave of people came in when my shift ended, and I couldn’t leave my coworker by herself.”

Jeno waved off your apology with a smile, “Don’t worry, you’re fine. We were just about to head in.”

He glanced over to Jisung who timidly extended the red bucket of popcorn towards her. 

“Here, um…I got this for you,” he mumbled, his words barely audible. The boy’s nerves eased when your eyes lit up with gratitude as you accepted the snack from him.

“Oh thank you. You didn’t have to do that,” you said softly, a faint blush dusting her cheeks. 

Jeno couldn’t discern whether you were touched by Jisung’s gesture or if it was simply your shy tendencies at play. Either way, the three of you headed into the theater room together and found your seats among the dimly lit rows. Throughout the movie, Jeno is mostly occupied with the plot unfolding on the large screen. However, he occasionally caught Jisung stealing nervous glances at Eunji from the corner of his eyes. Huh, he must really like her,  he thought to himself.

Two and a half hours later, the theater lights switched back on and people began to file out of the room accordingly. However, just as the three of them made their way outside the theater, Jisung suddenly realized his phone was missing.

“It must’ve slipped out of my pocket in the theater,” Jisung muttered, before turning to you and Jeno with a sheepish smile. “I’ll go back to find it. Are you okay with waiting here?”

You gave him a reassuring nod. “Of course, we won’t go anywhere.”

He smiled appreciatively before darting back into the building. Jisung’s absence left a subtle awkwardness in the air, a natural occurrence when two introverts were standing next to each other. In an attempt to move past that awkwardness, Jeno cleared his throat.

“So…what did you think of the movie?” 

His question ignited a spark of excitement in your eyes as if you had been waiting to discuss the movie with someone.

Though still appearing composed, you adjusted the strap of your purse. “I thought it was pretty good. I’m a big fan of action films.”

“Really?” Jeno cocked an eyebrow in amusement. “You don’t strike me as the type to enjoy the action genre.”

Your head tilted slightly with a smirk. “Why? Did you think I was more into cheesy rom-coms?”

“Kind of, to be honest,” Jeno said, rubbing the back of his neck. He couldn’t hold back a chuckle, having never witnessed this playful side of you before.

You placed a hand over your chest, pretending to be offended. “Well for your information, Sunbae. I happen to—”

Before you could finish your sentence, Jeno’s head shifted in the direction of the vibrating engine sound that filled his ears. Just as you also turned to see a red delivery motorbike charging straight towards you, Jeno’s body reacted faster than his mind.

The motorbike almost hit you when his hand wrapped around your wrist and swiftly pulled you back. As you stumbled forward, his other arm encircled your waist, holding you steady.

Once the vehicle had driven a safe distance away, Jeno met your eyes, which mirrored the shock on his own. His hand remained tightly wrapped around your wrist, his heart pounding in his chest. He couldn’t tell if it was from the near-collision or from how close you were to him at that moment, your faces mere inches apart.

Time seemed to stand still, as the two of you stared at each other with shaky breaths. The proximity with you sent a surge of warmth coursing through Jeno’s veins, as he realized how mesmerizing your face was up close. And as he gazed into your eyes, it was practically obvious that an instant flutter of attraction had stirred within the both of you.

However, that flutter was immediately overtaken by guilt. Quickly composing himself, Jeno released his grip on your hand and helped fix your position.

“You’re not hurt anywhere?” he asked, his voice slightly hoarse.

You also seemed to snap out of it, giving him a light nod in response. “Y-yeah, thank you,” you stammered, pressing your index fingers instinctively adjusting the alignment of your glasses.

His shoulders sank a little, feeling reassured by your answer. “It was nothing, really,” he replied kindly. 

Shortly after that exchange, Jisung came dashing out of the theater once more with his phone in hand. He returned to them with a flushed smile on his face

“Found it!” he said, “Do you guys want to go eat now?”

Jeno unintentionally met your eyes with a hint of hesitation before you turned to Jisung with a sweet nod. “Yeah, Jisung-ah. Let’s go.”

The dark-haired male trailed behind, listening as Jisung blabbered to you about his thoughts on the movie. His mind was racing with conflicted thoughts, and his heart still hadn’t stopped beating rapidly. Jeno cursed to himself, sincerely hoping this feeling would quickly fade away. 

Because if he wasn’t overthinking it, he might have just fallen for his best friend’s crush.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ getting too close

The university cafeteria hummed with the usual midday energy as Jeno spotted Jisung already seated at a table on the far right. Holding the metal tray of heaping food steadily in his hands, Jeno began making his way over. However, his footsteps slowed when he noticed you sitting across from Jisung. The three of you had never eaten lunch together before.

For a moment, Jeno contemplated just leaving and finding somewhere else to eat. No matter how hard he tried, his mind kept drifting to you since the incident that occurred a few days ago. The worst part was that he knew it was wrong to think about the first girl with whom Jisung avidly expressed his infatuation. Jeno repeatedly told himself that whatever he was feeling was temporary and would eventually go away if he ignored them.

“Jeno Hyung!” The sound of Jisung’s deep voice snapped him out of his thoughts. Jeno’s eyes flitted to the younger male, who waved his hand for him to come join them.

Knowing it would be hard to escape, Jeno’s feet reluctantly started moving again. He tried to appear as casual as possible as he took a seat next to Jisung.

“Glad I found you,” he mumbled, before briefly turning to greet you. “Hey, (Y/n)-ssi.”

You bowed your head politely. “It’s nice to see you, Jeno Sunbae.”

Jeno couldn’t help but detect an inexplicable layer beneath the typically reserved smile you were giving him. Maybe he hadn’t been the only one who couldn’t shake off the thoughts of what happened not too long ago. He tried not to dwell on that fantasy too much.

“(Y/n) and I were talking about the spring festival at the end of the month,” Jisung said, quickly filling him in on what he missed before he arrived. 

He nodded, picking up his chopsticks. “You’ll be performing with the dance team, right?”

“Yep, we’ve been preparing since the semester break,” Jisung said proudly, turning to you. “You’ll come to see it, right?”

Jeno noticed the genuine warmth in your smile toward the boy. “Of course, I will. I couldn’t miss something like that,” you replied affirmatively.

Your response made Jisung blush, causing him to lower his gaze slightly. Somehow, watching this exchange between the two of you left this gnawing feeling inside him. He wasn’t entirely sure why though.

His eyes followed when your attention momentarily shifted to your phone, which brightened with a text notification. Your brow furrowed as you read the message before looking up at him and Jisung.

“My friend Misun just texted, saying she signed up for a cooking class this Saturday. But apparently, all her friends ended up canceling due to schedule conflicts,” you explained, your eyes flickering between them. “She asked if I wanted to take their spots. I don’t know, would you guys be interested?”

Jeno’s mind clouded with uncertainty, as he turned to meet Jisung’s eyes. However, the boy’s eyes were already lighting up.

Jisung shrugged, “Well I’m not that great at cooking. But it sounds fun, right Jeno Hyung?”

“Huh—oh sure, why not?” Jeno fumbled over his words, agreeing without a second thought. 

You beamed, “Great, I’ll let her know.”

To be honest, Jeno wasn’t sure if this was a great idea. But Jisung already seemed so excited about a new opportunity to spend time with you and he felt obligated to be there as moral support. Although, he was no longer confident in how effective he could be as moral support.

════════

From the moment the cooking class started, Jeno didn’t feel too good. The class was divided into pairs. Of course, he encouraged Jisung to be your partner so the male could spend more time with you. He was left to work with Misun, who had invited them to today’s occasion. She was in the same grade as you were and Jeno vaguely recognized her from the university’s cheerleading team. Although he didn’t hate this arrangement, he honestly wished they weren’t stationed across from you.

Jeno was barely making any progress cutting ingredients for the soup everyone was supposed to make. His attention was drawn to Jisung nervously flipping through the recipe. He knew that Jisung was pretty much clueless when it came to cooking. However, Jeno observed you calmly instructing him to wash the vegetables, as you began heating water in a medium-sized pot. 

Your friend’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts. “Don’t you think they look cute together?” 

“Huh? Oh yeah, I’m glad (Y/n) is there to make sure Jisung won’t burn the kitchen down,” he replied, quickly regaining his composure.

Misun chuckled, her hand hovering near her mouth. “Honestly I was kinda surprised (Y/n) agreed to come today, she doesn’t usually attend these types of events.”

“Oh, really?” he asked.

“Yeah, but I think she's been trying to step out of her comfort zone lately,” Misun nodded, swiftly adding the chopped potatoes he had cut into the boiling pot. “And her inviting you guys to come makes more sense to me now.”

Jeno didn’t need to question further to understand what she was implying. Their gazes returned to you, who was guiding Jisung on how to mince garlic. A soft sigh escaped him, unintentionally. You truly did seem to enjoy Jisung’s company.

Shaking his head, Jeno attempted to concentrate more on the task at hand. For the next twenty minutes, he managed to be more productive. Just as everyone in the class was almost done making their soups, Misun asked him to cut some green onions for garnish.

However as he was doing so, the sound of your laugh mixed with Jisung’s reached his ears. Without thinking, he looked up to watch the two of you. He wondered what you guys were laughing about. From across the room, Jeno noticed that Jisung seemed noticeably more at ease in your presence now.

As Jeno’s eyes lingered on the scene before him, his hand slipped and the sharp edge of the knife pierced the tip of his thumb. A curse flew out of his mouth, and he barely registered Misun’s gasp that followed seconds after. When he opened his eyes, he found you rushing towards him with a folded paper towel in hand. Concern etched across your features as you placed it under his finger to catch the blood that was already dripping.

“Hyung, are you okay?” Jisung’s panicked voice came from behind you as he approached. 

Trying not to grimace as the sting of the cut started to kick in, Jeno forced a smile. “Yeah, it’s not that bad.”

“Not that bad, my foot,” you muttered, turning to the teacher who had come over with a first-aid kit. “Chef-nim, is it okay if I step out with Jeno to take care of his injury?”

“Of course, go right ahead.” The chef handed you the plastic blue box. With the paper towel still pressed against his finger, Jeno watched as you briefly glanced back at Jisung and Misun.

“Jisung, you’ll be okay right?” you asked, wanting to make sure he’d be alright without you there to finish things.

The male hesitated for a second before nodding eagerly, “Yeah—I can handle things, (Y/n).”

“I can help Jisung too if he needs it,” Misun chimed in, “You two go ahead.”

With their assurances confirmed, Jeno soon found himself seated on a bench in the hallway beside you. His thumb pulsed with a relentless drumbeat, throbbing with pain. Nonetheless, he couldn’t help but be drawn to the way you were delicately tending to his wound, even as worry furrowed your brow. Perhaps, you were one of the few people who looked at him like that.

“You don’t have to do this, you know,” he said quietly, glancing down as you finally managed to stop the bleeding. 

As you set the red-soaked paper towel aside, you reached for some gauze to clean the cut with an antiseptic solution. Jeno bit down on his lip, suppressing a wince from the sting of it, even though you were being careful.

Focused on treating his wound meticulously, you spoke without meeting his eyes. “You’re right, but it’s the least I can do. Especially after you literally saved my life last time.”

Though he wanted to, Jeno couldn’t find an argument against that. Once you finished cleaning the cut, you wrapped his finger with some white bandage. He noticed you pause after as you held his hand momentarily, before returning it to his lap. His eyes met yours in a brief, yet charged five seconds that made his heart pound—rather against his will. This situation felt too much like déjà vu to him. Was he the only one?

You then cleared your throat, shifting your gaze to look straight ahead. Subconsciously, you pushed up your glasses that had fallen slightly off the bridge of your nose.

“Try to be careful when using your left hand. Your thumb should heal in a few weeks.”

“Thank you,” he breathed, also having trouble making eye contact with you.

A small exhale was let out by you, before glancing in his direction again. Jeno could tell you wanted to say something, but you seemed to hold back this time.

“No problem, Sunbae,” you smiled at him, rising from the bench. “We should go back to our friends. I’ve never seen Jisung look so frightened before. He seemed really worried about you.”

The mention of Jisung’s name stung worse than the knife had. Jeno hadn’t even thought about him since they left, and he hated himself for it. This day was supposed to be for his friend to get closer to you. Not him.

One thing for sure was that Jeno didn’t know what he was doing anymore.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ the moment of realization

As the month flew by, Jeno tried but failed to limit his interactions with you. Hangouts with you and Jisung became more frequent, and the younger male often pleaded for his presence as moral support. Jeno tried to ignore his growing feelings for you. But it was hard when his spare time was now consistently consumed by being a part of this trio.

Then during the next club meeting, fate landed him and you paired to volunteer at the pet shelter again. He tried to convince Jaemin to trade shifts with him, but couldn’t find a plausible excuse without risking his secret being exposed or accidentally casting you in a negative light.

So he unfortunately found himself in the back room, folding freshly cleaned laundry alongside you. As the piles of white towels and soft cat beds grew around them, Jeno couldn’t help but steal occasional glances at you, observing how you folded the towels so meticulously. If you sensed his gaze on you, Jeno couldn’t tell.

“I’m looking forward to seeing Jisung perform at the spring festival next week. Are you?” you asked, once again breaking the awkward silence between you. Jeno mentally chastised himself for not initiating the conversation himself.

He nodded, mustering a tentative smile. “Yeah, I am. Jisung shines the most when he’s dancing.”

Before Jeno could hear your agreement, a staff member positioned near the doorway caught both of your attention. “Can you guys bring some kittens back to their condos from the private room?” she asked politely, her eyes darting between the both of you. “The customer decided to come back another time.”

“Of course, we’ll take care of it.” He heard you reply in the sweet, natural tone you often used around people in general.

The staff member sent the both of you a grateful smile, and stepped aside, allowing him and you to make your way to the private room. However, once you got there, there were no tiny felines in sight. As you mumbled words of concern, Jeno crouched down near the big blue chair to search for any hint of movement.

“Um, I think they’re under here,” Jeno said, his suspicions confirmed as he spotted two black furballs discernible only by their light green eyes.

You bent down to his level, your expression softening as you took a closer look. “Poor things, they must be scared.”

“Yeah I guess whoever came by must’ve unintentionally frightened them,” he agreed, extending his arm in an attempt to bring the kittens out from under the chair. However, his actions only served to make them shrink further against the wall.

Jeno let out a sigh of frustration, sitting up to see if you had any ideas on how to get the kittens out. He noticed the frown on your lips deepen, as you briefly scanned the room. Then, he saw your eyes light up with determination as you picked up a discarded cat wand from the floor.

With curiosity, Jeno watched as you crouched down and shook the wand, causing the feather tip to swish against the ground. “Come on, little ones,” you cooed gently, your voice sounding like a soothing melody in the quiet room.

It didn’t take long for the tantalizing movements to attract the kittens, inevitably coaxing them out of their hiding place. Jeno felt relief wash over him, as he finally scooped up one of the kittens, while you did the same with its sibling.

“Wow, you’re a genius,” he complimented absentmindedly, genuinely impressed by your quick thinking. 

You lightly chuckled, a hint of bashfulness coloring your cheeks. “You don’t have to exaggerate, Sunbae.”

As Jeno followed behind your lead back to the main room, he was unable to tear his gaze away from you. Something about witnessing you hug the tiny cat against your chest, placing little kisses on the top of its head, and whispering sweet words of assurance, triggered the feeling he had been trying to bury down throughout the entire month. 

Jeno held his kitten a little closer to his chest, feeling its warm black fur between his fingers. He knew then that he was officially doomed. No matter how hard he tried to remind himself of his loyalty to Jisung and resist the way you continued to make his heart race, he couldn’t stop himself from falling for you.

At that moment, Jeno realized that he was fighting a battle he was destined to lose.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ how one kiss leads to catastrophe

Ever since you met up with Misun for the spring festival, the strange look she kept giving you was making you want to hide. After enduring ten minutes of her burning stature, you couldn’t take it anymore. When you finally sat down at one of the food stalls, waiting for the guys to arrive, you decided to speak up.

“Why do you keep looking at me like that?” you asked, wondering if you had done something to upset her.

Misun continued to eye you suspiciously. “Do you have a crush on Lee Jeno?” she answered with a question that immediately caught you off guard.

“W-what?” you laughed as if she just made a ridiculous statement. “No, I don’t…I mean… is it that obvious?” 

A smirk of satisfaction stretched across Misun’s lips as she saw your cheeks heating up as you anxiously awaited her response.

Casually leaning back in her seat, she crossed her arms. “Not necessarily. At first, I thought you liked Jisung. But then I started to wonder if it was Jeno after seeing you rush over to help him when he cut his finger.”

“So it is obvious,” you groaned in embarrassment, hiding your face in your hands. It was a good thing the guys hadn’t arrived yet, or else you’d be such an awkward mess.

Amusement danced in Misun’s eyes as she leaned forward on the table. “I can’t believe (L/n) (Y/n) has a crush on someone. When did you start liking him?” she asked.

You pondered for a bit, tracing back to the events that occurred this past month. Your social life certainly has taken a turn ever since you became friends with Jeno and Jisung. Although you instinctively wanted to decline Jeno’s first invitation to hang out, Misun’s constantly chastising you for antisocial tendencies. In fact, she was the one who pushed you to join the animal volunteer club because she knew how much you liked cats.

“Well, I didn’t really pay much attention to him before, even though we saw each other at his club. I think it started after we watched a movie at the theater when he saved me from getting hit by a motorcycle,” you began to explain, recalling the details from that night.

Misun clasped a hand over her mouth and gasped, “No way, you had a k-drama moment!”

“I guess you could call it that,” you chuckled softly, lowering your gaze. “But the way he held me—so gently yet securely—and looking into his eyes, I don’t know…I just felt this spark?”

You weren’t exactly sure how to describe it. Honestly, you had been too focused on your academics and personal stuff to go anywhere near men. Yet that one heart-flutter moment with Jeno was enough to make you want to reconsider staying away from dating. It was sort of the catalyst that made you start to see Jeno in a different light.

“The more I spent time around Jeno, I just started to notice him more. Like how he can be quite funny when you get closer to him,” you continued, your voice softening with admiration. “He’s so good with the cats too, they always snuggle up to him when we visit the shelter. And he really is cute, like I don’t know how such a manly-looking guy can be so…endearing.”

Misun’s eyes widened in slight surprise. “Wow, you really do like him.”

“Gosh, I’m hopeless, aren’t I?” you mumbled, rather pitifully. You hadn’t even realized how fond you’ve become of the boy until Misun pointed it out.

 “Hopelessly in love,” Misun teased in a sing-song voice. “So, do you plan on confessing your feelings to him?”

Her question made your heart sink a little. “I don’t think so. He probably doesn’t feel the same as me, and I’d probably just make things awkward between us.”

You would be lying if you said you hadn’t thought about what would happen if Jeno was aware of your crush on him. But for now, you were content with admiring him from afar, hesitant to pursue anything more. Misun, on the other hand, did not seem satisfied with that idea.

“Okay, I get what you’re saying, but I honestly think you have a pretty good chance, (Y/n),” Misun said, her tone brimming with conviction. “He literally couldn’t stop looking at you during the cooking class. Well, you know—until he cut his finger.”

While that did intrigue you a little, you didn’t want to entertain any false hope. You sighed, shaking your head in disbelief. “Misun, I really don’t think—”

“Trust me on this. I can even prove it to you,” she interrupted, her eyes gleaming with persistence. “We’ll do a little test. When Jeno and Jisung get here, I’ll ‘accidentally” spill something on your shirt. If Jeno likes you, he’ll offer his jacket.”

Your brow furrowed in perplexion. “I don’t see how that’s supposed to prove anything.”

“Because it’s a classic romantic gesture,” Misun insisted, tapping the table for emphasis. “It’ll work, I just know it.”

Although you were skeptical about Misun’s idea, you worried that any further disagreement would be futile. Maybe you could find a way to back out at the last minute. Besides, this so-called “test” couldn’t even happen if Jeno wasn’t wearing a jacket.

To your dismay, Jeno arrived wearing a denim jacket over a plain white t-shirt. Your stomach started doing somersaults when Misun waved him and Jisung over to your table.

“Great, you guys are finally here,” she said, flashing them both a smile as she gestured for them to sit. “We already ordered food, so it should be coming out soon.”

Jeno returned her smile with a nod and settled into the seat across from you. “Thanks. Sorry we’re a little late…we got sidetracked.”

“Wah, you guys should’ve seen Jeno Hyung arm wrestling!” Jisung exclaimed, his cheeks flushed with excitement. “It was so cool watching him beat all the guys that challenged him. Even Mark Hyung lost, and he’s really strong.”

For a moment, your nerves faded as you listened to Jisung ramble enthusiastically. It was cute to see him raving about his friend, especially with Jeno looking embarrassed. But you weren’t too surprised to hear about Jeno’s strength. You’ve noticed the prominent veins snaking along his muscular arms before—not that you were staring.

“It’s not a big deal, really,” Jeno said, brushing off Jisung’s praise. Strange, you didn’t think you'd seen him blush before.

But you found it interesting how they alternated between being shy and confident. Their dynamic was certainly something you continued to admire since getting to know them. 

Misun chimed in, giving you a nudge with her elbow. “I’d say that’s pretty impressive. Don’t you think, (Y/n)-ah?”

“Yeah, definitely,” you agreed, appearing calm on the outside, though the somersaults in your stomach resumed. You shot your friend a discreet glare before changing the subject.

“Anyway,” you said with a smile, hoping the anticipation in your voice was evident. “I can’t wait to see you dance later, Jisung!”

You guessed it was Jisung’s turn to be shy, as a light shade of pink tinged his cheeks. “Oh, thanks. I spent all last night practicing, but I’m still nervous,” he mumbled bashfully.

“I always tell him he has nothing to be nervous about,” Jeno quipped, rolling his eyes playfully. His remark only intensified the blush on Jisung’s cheeks as he glanced down at the table in embarrassment.

You and Misun shared a small laugh at the exchange. “Well, it’s only natural. But I know you’ll do great, Jisung-ah!”

Jisung exhaled deeply, his hand resting on his chest as he met your eyes with a sincere expression.

“Thanks, (Y/n)-ah. I definitely feel better having you—uh, I mean, all of you to support me,” he said, his voice laced with gratitude.

The four of you enjoyed the convivial atmosphere and loosened up when food and drinks were eventually delivered to your table. You almost forgot about Misun’s subtle scheme unfolding.

True to her earlier proposal, she passed you a preemptive look before “accidentally” knocking her elbow against the half-empty soju bottle in front of you. You gasped involuntarily as the cold liquid splashed onto your blouse. And now, you regret your decision to also wear white today.

Misun pushed her chair back, feigning a look of guilt. But you caught the mischievous glint in her eyes. “Oh no, I’m so clumsy! Sorry about that.”

Though her tone was apologetic, you didn’t miss the mischievous glint in her eyes before she shifted her gaze to the guys. Almost afraid to witness their reactions, you glanced down at the unflattering stain on your blouse. This was a lot more embarrassing than you thought it would be.

“It’s fine. Don’t worry about it, Misun,” you attempted to laugh it off, though your grip on the hem of your shirt betrayed your discomfort.

You were too flustered to notice as Jeno started to remove his jacket. However, when you glanced up, Jisung was already shrugging off his light blue hoodie and handing it to you.

“Here, wear this for now,” he offered, his eyes filled with concern.

You looked at him with slight surprise. “Oh, are you sure?”

“Yeah, I have to change later anyway,” he said earnestly. “It’ll keep you warm when it gets cold later tonight too!”

“Well—thanks, Jisung-ah,” you said kindly, hesitantly accepting the hoodie and slipping it on. 

The grin on Jisung’s face stretched so wide, but you were too overwhelmed with a different emotion to pick up on it. Although you did appreciate his gesture, a pang of disappointment gnawed at you, and you hated it. 

Meanwhile, Misun was watching Jeno closely. She saw how he paused mid-motion, his jacket still halfway off his shoulders, and caught the brief flicker of jealousy in his eyes as Jisung’s hoodie practically swallowed your petite frame. However, Jeno quickly regained his composure and smoothly slid his jacket back on as if nothing had happened.

Jisung glanced at his phone and took a deep breath. "Well, I better go get ready for the show tonight. I'll see you guys later?"

His eyes lingered on you, noticing your distant expression as you pondered how things hadn’t turned out the way you’d foolishly hoped.

"Yep, we'll be right in the crowd to cheer you on, Jisung-ah!" Misun replied enthusiastically for the both of you.

With that, Jisung waved one last time to you guys before heading off. Jeno cleared his throat and offered to throw out the trash from the table. As he excused himself, Misun grabbed your wrist before you could escape as well.

“Okay, I know things didn’t go exactly as planned. But—” she started to say.

This time, you shut her down by raising your hand. “No, I don’t want to hear it,” you shook your head, voice filled with irritation. “This was stupid. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Misun tugged on your wrist with urgency. “You have to listen to me, (Y/n). I saw Jeno was going to give you his jacket. Jisung just beat him to it!”

While you didn’t want to dismiss your friend’s words, you found them hard to believe. Standing with your arms crossed in uncertainty, the festival continued as your mind was preoccupied with the thoughts of Lee Jeno. You spotted him engaging in small talk with one of the seniors who was running the food stall where you had eaten.

Oh, how you wished seeing the way his eyes crinkled into half-crescents didn’t make your heart skip a beat. As the festival continued around you, your thoughts remained fixated on him. 

Misun was right about one thing, you were hopelessly in love.

════════

Honestly, Jeno didn’t know what he was thinking when he had nearly offered you his jacket back there, acting almost out of instinct. Jisung was the one he was supposed to be encouraging to do those sorts of things. He hated how fast his heart continued to race with you sitting next to him in the auditorium.

Jeno could see the boy’s eyes practically bursting with joy when he saw you wearing his hoodie earlier. He should’ve been happy to see his friend make a move on the girl he liked. Compared to when he first met you, Jisung was coming out of his shell more, and Jeno wasn’t sure he entirely needed him to be his wingman anymore. However, Jisung had no idea how conflicted and inadequate Jeno felt in that role.

“Are you okay, Sunbae?” you asked, your voice bringing him back to reality. 

“Huh—oh yeah, I’m fine,” Jeno replied, scratching his head sheepishly. “Guess I just zoned out for a bit.”

Your eyes still carried a hint of concern, as if you weren’t fully convinced by his dismissive response. But before Jeno could offer further reassurance, Misun tapped your shoulder excitedly. “Look, the performance is starting!”

Both of you turned your attention to the stage as the lights came on. Jeno immediately spotted Jisung in the center position among the group. As the first song began to play, Jisung's body moved effortlessly with the beat. The group launched into a medley of legendary boy group hits from older groups like H.O.T and Shinhwa to contemporary acts like EXO and BTS.

Jisung led the charge, his movements precise and powerful, each step perfectly in sync with the music. The crowd’s energy surged as they recognized the familiar tunes and the dance team fed off that excitement, their performance growing more dynamic with each song. Jeno was always to see his friend who was usually so shy, transform into a powerhouse of energy and confidence once he got on stage.

Yet Jeno was focusing more on you, watching the way your face lit up in mesmerization as you were captivated by this side of Jisung you hadn’t seen much of before. Seeing you in Jisung’s hoodie only intensified the pit of jealousy gnawing at Jeno’s stomach. He couldn’t shake the feeling and realized he selfishly wanted to be the one to bring that light into your eyes.

He almost didn’t realize the performance had ended, except for the loud sound of applause as the stage went dark again. 

“Wow, Jisungie was amazing!” you exclaimed, gushing to him and Misun. “I’m so proud of him.”

Misun chuckled at your enthusiasm before glancing at her phone. “Well, this was nice. But I better get going now, my team leader wants to squeeze in one last practice before our performance on the second day of the festival.”

As Misun gathered her things to leave for practice, she bid you both a quick goodbye, promising to catch up later. Left standing in the bustling auditorium, Jeno turned to you with a smile.

"Want to wait outside? It's less crowded and quieter," he suggested, gesturing towards the exit. 

You agreed and soon found yourselves standing on a serene stone bridge just outside the festival grounds. He could tell you were still captivated by Jisung’s performance, not that he could blame you. The air was cooler outside, and Jeno was glad you had Jisung’s hoodie to keep you warm. Tall trees lined the path, their leaves rustling gently in the evening breeze. Though the sky was dark, the dim lights from the festival cast a soft, warm glow that created a peaceful atmosphere. 

As they walked along the bridge, Jeno heard you exhale. “You were right. Jisung truly does shine when he dances.”

“Yeah, he’s been dancing long before I even met him in high school,” he said with a hint of nostalgia in his voice. 

As you both talked about Jisung’s performance and reminisced about the recent memories you’ve shared as friends, Jeno felt his nerves die down a little. It was strange how the sight of you made him incredibly nervous, yet his body would automatically relax when you two talked. Despite not having much to say, he noticed your eyes focused intently on him whenever he spoke, and he could tell you were fully listening. 

A short silence settled you two, a familiar pause in his interactions with you, Jeno didn’t trust himself to speak, fearing he might ruin everything if he gave away his feelings. And just as the other times, you were the one to break the awkwardness. 

“You know, I don’t let many people in,” you confessed. “But I’m really glad I got closer to you and Jisung this semester.”

Jeno was slightly taken aback by the vulnerability he caught in your voice. Now that he thought about it, you had been somewhat withdrawn before he helped Jisung get closer to you. It wasn’t that you were cold, but he noticed you liked to be alone and only engaged with those you knew well, showing no interest in reaching out to others. He had never judged you for it, figuring you had your reasons.

He nodded thoughtfully, looking at you with an understanding smile. “Well, I’m glad you let us in. It’s been nice getting to know the mysterious barista girl who likes action movies and has a hidden talent for charming cats.”

“You’re so funny, Sunbae,” you giggled, shaking your head. Hearing your laugh was like music to his ears, as cliché as that sounded. 

The evening breeze rustled the leaves around you as Jeno saw you contemplate for a moment. “Honestly, I’ve really enjoyed our time together,” you began, your gentle voice sounding nervous but earnest. “And seeing you today made me realize that I don’t just see you my senior.”

Alerts went off in Jeno’s mind as he recognized the direction this conversation was taking.  No, this isn’t supposed to happen, he tried to tell himself, knowing how much Jisung liked you.

After exhaling softly, you spoke up. “I like you, Jeno Sunbae.”

For a moment, silence hung heavy between you, and Jeno knew you saw the conflicting emotions flicker across his face. He didn't know what to say, more so because he felt he shouldn’t say anything at all. Seeing your smile falter only made him feel worse.

“But it’s okay if you don’t feel the same way! I just wanted to get it off my chest,” you hurriedly added out of slight panic.

His eyes gaze into yours with the same intensity from that day he saved you from the motorcycle. So many emotions swirled within him, pushing Jeno to his limits. He couldn’t look at you without wanting something more. Before you could say anything else, Jeno impulsively cupped your face with his hands and leaned in, sharing the most passionate kiss either of you had ever experienced. 

Your lips were softer than he imagined them, carrying a faint taste of the soju you both had earlier. As he deepened the kiss, he could feel the slight pressure of your glasses against his cheek. But in that moment he didn’t care, his desire to be close to you overwhelmed any minor distraction.

Almost immediately, you melted into the kiss, as if you both had secretly longed for this moment. One of Jeno’s hands slid down to the back of your neck, his fingers threading through your hair and pulling you even closer. The other hand drifted to your waist, his touch firm yet tender. Your fingers curled into the fabric of his jacket, grasping tightly as you responded eagerly to his touch. 

Kissing you now made Jeno realize how much he had wanted to do it all those times. When he caught you in his arms after the movies that day, when you took care of the cut on his finger when he saw the affection in your eyes as you cared for the kittens at the shelter. Each moment he wanted to press his lips against yours and convey just how much you made his head spin.

The kiss only ended when the both of you started to feel lightheaded. The soft sound of your mingling breaths filled the air around you, and Jeno let out a soft sigh of contentment. A smile was about to form on his lips, until he noticed your eyes widening, looking past his shoulder.

That was when he turned around, only to find Jisung standing at the other end of the bridge, his expression a mix of shock and hurt.

The younger male shook his head in disbelief. “No way…”

“Jisung, I…” he called out, his voice already full of regret.

But Jisung didn’t wait for him to finish. With a glare of betrayal, his best friend turned and stormed off into the night. Jeno cursed quietly under his breath.

You glanced at him in confusion, searching his eyes for answers as to why Jisung just left so angrily. But Jeno couldn’t explain everything to you right now. He had to go find Jisung.

“I’m sorry, (Y/n). I—I have to go,” he said, reluctantly pulling himself away from you. 

Then he left you standing there, completely bewildered, the guilt already beginning to pile up inside him.

════════

“Jisung-ah, wait!” Jeno called out, his heart sinking as he caught up to his friend, now a far distance from the bridge. “Please, just let me explain.”

Jisung finally stopped in his tracks and turned sharply, his eyes ablaze with fury and hurt. Jeno has never seen him look so angry before. 

“I just saw you kissing the girl I’ve been crushing on for ages. So tell me, what is there to explain, Hyung?” Jisung demanded, his voice trembling with betrayal. 

His mind raced with regret, struggling to find the right words. “I…I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

The younger male scoffed, the memory of him kissing you still vivid in his mind. “How long were you going to deceive me?”

“I swear, I didn’t even look at her that way when you first told me about her,” Jeno insisted, his voice laced with guilt. “It sort of just happened…and I know how much you like her. But no matter how much I try, I just can’t get rid of these feelings.”

Jisung shook his head in disbelief, his fists clenched at his sides. “All this time, I actually thought I had a chance with (Y/n), but my own best friend goes behind my back. I feel like a complete idiot.”

Jeno’s heart twisted painfully at the sting that came with his friend’s words. He knew he screwed up badly and Jisung had every right to be upset with him. He wasn’t even sure if this was something that could be fixed so easily. 

“I’m sorry, Jisung-ah. I just didn’t want to hurt you,” he lamented.

But his apology wasn’t what Jisung wanted to hear. “Well you did hurt me,” he snapped, his voice cracking with emotions. “I trusted you, Hyung. You were supposed to have my back.”

Jeno cursed under his breath and reached out to touch his friend’s shoulder. “I still do, Jisung-ah.”

But the boy flinched away and took a step back. “I can’t be around you right now. And don’t follow me this time,” Jisung said, his voice stern and final.

With that, Jisung turned and walked away, leaving Jeno standing there with a heavy heart full of guilt and regret. He wanted to call out and explain further, but he knew there was nothing more he could say to undo the pain he had caused his best friend. Things weren’t supposed to happen this way and it was all his fault.

The weight of his actions left him feeling crushed.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ the end of first loves

The days since their fallout with Jisung weighed heavily on Jeno. Any texts he sent were left on read and whenever they crossed paths, Jisung walked straight past him without a second glance. Jeno swore he was on the verge of losing it. 

He was angry. Angry at Jisung for not hearing him out, angry at you for confessing to him at the festival of all times. But mostly, he was angry at himself for letting this all happen in the first place. He should’ve known that nothing good would come out of falling for his best friend’s crush.

Wallowing in his despair, Jeno isolated himself in the club room where Jaemin eventually found him. The other dark-haired male sighed when he saw the troubled expression on his friend’s face.

“So this is where you’ve been hiding out lately?” Jaemin remarked lightheartedly, pulling out a chair from the table to sit across from him. 

Jeno sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “It’s not like I have anywhere else to go. Jisung keeps ignoring me and I can’t even look at (Y/n) right now. They both probably hate me.”

“Yeah, I tried talking to Jisung and he still seems pretty mad. This was the first time he’s really liked someone,” Jaemin pointed out. His tone was sympathetic but it only made Jeno feel worse.

He slammed his fist against the table, not even caring about the sting it left on his knuckles. “I know! Everything is messed up because of me and I have no idea how to fix it.”

There was a tense silence that hung in the air, Jaemin not having expected his friend’s sudden outrage. But he couldn’t necessarily blame him. 

Jaemin sighed empathetically, leaning forward with a serious expression. “Look, I get that you’re in a tough spot, man. But you can’t blame yourself for everything. Sometimes things just happen, and people get hurt.”

Jeno slumped in his chair, the anger in him slowly simmering as Jaemin placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “What matters now is how you handle it,” he continued. “Jisung just needs some space right now, he’ll come around eventually. As for (Y/n), maybe it’s time to talk to her and sort things out.”

Despite the guilt that still lingered in him, he knew Jaemin was right. As painful as it was to think about it, he understood what he needed to do.

════════

Nearly a week had slipped by since the festival, and Jeno finally encountered you again at the pet shelter. The awkwardness between you was palpable, and few words were exchanged throughout the volunteer shift.  It wasn’t until after you changed out your volunteer clothes and prepared to leave that Jeno gathered the courage to say something.

Exiting the building together, Jeno hesitated before breaking the silence. “Hey, can we talk for a moment?”

He could see the apprehension in your eyes when you glanced at him. But then you gave him a light nod of agreement. 

That was how you ended up seated at a nearby café. Jeno fidgeted with the sleeve of his jacket, unable to meet your eyes at first. He noticed your nervousness as you lightly tapped the cold glass of your iced latte. 

You seemed to sense his unease and responded with a gentle smile. “It’s okay, Sunbae. Just tell me.”

Jeno could already feel his heart sinking as he heard you speak so kindly to him. He hated that what he was about to say would hurt you, but it was what had to be done. He had to end things.

“I…we…” he started, finding it hard to articulate. “I don’t think this is going to work out between us.”

He could see your smile waver slightly, but you encouraged him to continue with a nod. Glancing down, he stared into his own cup of coffee which had probably gone cold now. 

Sighing softly, he leaned forward to explain. “The truth is, Jisung was the one who liked you from the beginning. I was supposed to help him get closer to you…but then I started to feel something for you and now I brought you into this mess.”

You stayed silent, processing what he just told you. He could tell you were surprised by his confession. Perhaps you had been too focused on someone else to notice.

“Oh, I had no idea…,” your voice trailed off, unsure of what to say to this.

Jeno swallowed hard, forcing himself to continue. “Now I understand why Jisung liked you so much,” he tried to smile but failed. “And I really do like you, (Y/n). But… Jisung is my best friend, and I betrayed him. So I don’t think it would be right for us to be together.”

Your reaction was a lot calmer than he thought it would be, almost as if you had anticipated things going in this direction after the way things ended the other night.

“It’s okay Sunbae, I understand. Thank you for being honest with me,” you replied softly. Your voice remained steady, but Jeno could hear the underlying melancholy in it.

The silence that followed was so agonizing that one could practically hear the sounds of hearts breaking. Jeno could see you were struggling to hold a smile, and a hundred apologies wouldn’t be enough to express how sorry he felt about all this.

When you finally parted ways, Jeno shoved his hands in his pockets, watching as you walked farther and farther away from him. But no matter how awful he felt, he kept telling himself that things were better this way.

Later that day, Misun was starting to panic when you didn’t respond to any of her texts. All you had told her was that Jeno and you met up to talk today, and she hadn’t heard anything from you since then. 

Figuring you had to be back on campus by now, Misun ventured outside to search for you. Just as she was about to pass the space between the engineering building and the liberal arts building, the sound of someone crying stopped and made her pause. 

That was when she found you nearly crumpled to the ground with your hands pressed against your eyes, shoulders shaking with silent sobs.

“(Y/n)?” she called out cautiously, crouching down beside you.

You didn’t look up, but your voice trembled as you replied. “I feel so stupid for crying. It's not like we were even together.”

This heavy feeling of sadness was unfamiliar, a weight you hadn’t carried before. Confusion mingled with sorry, leaving you uncertain about its source. Was it disappointment? Betrayal? Or simply the abrupt end of something that never fully began?

“How can you not be upset?” Misun affirmed gently. “He’s your first love.”

Hearing her words caused more tears to well up in your eyes, and you buried your head in your knees. It suddenly dawned on you that Jeno had been your first love. You had heard too many stories of first loves ending bitterly, but you never expected it to hurt this much. As much as you wanted to harbor resentment for what happened, you couldn’t find it in you to be angry. Instead, you were left to pick up the shattered pieces of your heart.

Meanwhile, Jeno sat in a dimly lit bar, three empty bottles of soju strewn across the table. Jaemin watched sympathetically as his distraught friend poured more into his glass. It was unusual for the both of them to drink, a clear indicator to Jaemin of just how deeply Jeno was affected by the situation. 

“So you ended things with her?” Jaemin asked, eyeing Jeno as he downed the shot.

“It’s what I had to do,” he murmured in response, his voice hoarse.

His gaze fixed on his reflection through the shot glass, and he saw the misery etched on his face. Gosh, he was a complete mess. How had everything gone so wrong?

Jeno heard Jaemin sigh as he patted him on the shoulder, offering a small measure of comfort. “You did the right thing, Jeno-yah,” he assured him. “Maybe it’s for the best, you know?”

Maybe the alcohol had finally set into his system as Jeno placed his glass firmly on the table. Memories of all his stolen moments with you flooded his mind, and he felt the sting of tears springing to his eyes. Cursing under his breath, he harshly swiped at them with his hand, feeling pathetic.

Jaemin pretended not to notice he was crying and silently stayed by his side. What else could he say? He knew how much Jeno liked you, and it was unfortunate that things unfolded this way. If Jeno was feeling this devastated, Jaemin could only imagine the turmoil you must be going through.

Perhaps, this was simply one of those instances where nobody found their happy ending.

════════

Eventually, the sharp sting you initially felt was gradually replaced by a dull ache in your heart. Misun made an effort to lift your spirits was appreciated. Some of your other friends noticed your despondency lately. But you brushed off their concerns with the excuse that you were just tired, feeling guilty for damping the mood.

All the crying and emotional turmoil had drained you of energy. The smiles you offered customers at the café felt strained, and focusing on assignments required every ounce of motivation you could muster.

Having to see Jeno from time to time at club meetings only made things more difficult. You tried not to make eye contact, yet sometimes you couldn't escape the weight of his sorrowful gaze, which tugged at your heart. Even sitting in the playroom surrounded by cats no longer brought you the joy it once did, not even when a kitten nestled snugly in your lap.

Nervously, you exhaled as you stood outside of the dance team’s practice room. You had finally gathered the courage to return Jisung’s hoodie, which had been neatly washed weeks ago. It had been neatly washed a while ago, but you had been hesitant to see Jisung after everything, fearing the awkwardness. Thus, the light blue clothing had been sitting untouched on the top of your dresser for some time.

“(Y/n)? What are you doing here?” Jisung’s surprised voice snapped you out of your thoughts. The other students exiting through the door briefly glanced at the two of you as they passed by.

Straightening your posture, your mind raced to find the words you had prepared. “I–uh, I wanted to give this back to you,” you said, holding out the hoodie. “Sorry it took me so long to return it.”

Jisung slowly accepted the hoodie with a grateful smile. “It’s okay, thanks for giving it back.”

You returned his smile, feeling some of the tension in your shoulders ease. As you exhaled softly, a sense of relief washed over you. This was the moment where you could simply excuse yourself and make your exit. Yet, looking at Jisung stirred a mix of emotions within you.

“Do…do you have time to talk?” you asked, your voice trembling slightly.

The tall male standing in front of you remained silent, hesitating for a moment. Eventually, he gave you a small nod and you spared him a grateful look, heading outside the building to find a bench to sit on.

Taking a deep breath, you tried to steady your nerves. Despite all the mental preparation you did the previous night, you didn’t feel as ready as you’d hoped. Jisung’s tense posture made it clear he wasn’t exactly calm either.

“I…I just wanted to say I’m really sorry, Jisung,” you finally spoke, glancing down at your shoes. “I didn’t realize you felt that way about me, and I never meant to come between you and Jeno.”

Jisung’s expression softened, and he laughed awkwardly. “It’s not your fault, (Y/n). You didn’t do anything wrong.”

Though his voice was reassuring, you still felt incredibly guilty for causing conflict between him and Jeno. As a moment of silence passed, a pang of sadness lingered within you. Jisung had always been so genuine with you, yet you couldn’t give him the answer he wanted.

“I think you’re an amazing person, Jisung-ah,” you said, hoping he could hear the sincerity in your voice. “You’ve been nothing but kind to me, and I’m always at ease when I’m with you.”

Jisung inhaled deeply, a wistful smile playing on his lips. “Thank you, (Y/n). It makes me happy to hear that.”

Smiling back, you folded your hands in your lap. “I’m sorry I can’t return your feelings…”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Jisung sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Feelings aren’t something we can control, so there’s no need to be sorry.”

You looked up, surprised by the maturity in his response. Honestly, you hadn’t considered it from that perspective until he brought it up. But you still knew that this couldn’t be easy for him. Nobody liked rejection.

“I guess you have a point. But I know that the girl who ends up with you will be very lucky,” you said, gently.

He glanced at you appreciatively. “It means a lot to hear you say that, thank you.”

The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the heaviness of the conversation hanging in the air. Sensing that it might be a good time to part ways, you stood up from the bench.

“I guess I should get going,” you cleared your throat quietly. “I’ve probably taken up enough of your time already.”

Jisung shook his head and assured, “No, you’re all good. I’m glad we talked.”

“Me too,” you hummed in response, definitely feeling like a weight had been lifted from your shoulders. Following you, he rose from the bench and paused briefly before extending his hand. 

“Thank you, (Y/n),” he said, his voice catching slightly. “For being my first love.”

You could see the tears glossing over his eyes, tugging at your heartstrings. Trying to hold back your own tears, you accepted his handshake with a sad smile.

Nodding gently, a lump formed in your throat. “Thank you too, for being such a great friend,” you whispered softly, afraid that tears might escape if you spoke any louder.

With heavy hearts, you both shook hands firmly before parting ways. Jisung sighed as you departed first. Things hadn’t turned out the way he had wanted them, but he couldn’t just stay hung up on what could’ve been.

Despite the bittersweet swirl of emotions inside him, he couldn’t help but smile as he watched you walk farther away. For his first love, he could at least say it ended with no regrets.

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~ reconciling

Jeno had been navigating through days that felt like weeks, his usual routine disrupted by the absence of you and his strained relationship with Jisung. Even though he had done everything he could to make up for his actions, he couldn’t rid himself of the gloominess that clouded his every thought. His mind constantly replayed the events that led to this rift between him and Jisung.

So when his phone screen lit up with a message from Jisung, asking to meet after class, Jeno’s heart raced with a mixture of apprehension and hope. They agreed to meet at the PC bang they went to all the time during their high school days. Jeno remembered all the trouble they got into when their parents found out he and Jisung were skipping their after-school programs to go there.

Jisung was already there by the time he arrived, sitting in their usual spot near the middle of the back row. Peering at his screen, Jeno noticed he was already warming up with an old game they used to play. 

“Hey,” Jeno greeted cautiously, trying to keep the awkwardness out of his voice as he settled into the gaming chair next to him.

Other than the nod of acknowledgement he received, Jisung’s expression remained unreadable. The younger male briefly glanced up at him, his fingers pausing on the rainbow keyboard.

“Want to start with PUBG?” Jisung asked, his voice lacking the cold tone from their last interaction.

Jeno’s shoulders relaxed slightly, and he nodded with a smile. Soon enough, the familiar click of keyboards and the hum of the PC field the air as they dove into the game. Within ten minutes of playing, they were high school students again, shouting at each other as they fought through the virtual battlegrounds together.

“Ugh I died again,” Jisung groaned in frustration, leaning back in his seat.

Jeno shook his head with a chuckle. “I told you to go the other way!”

In the last seconds of the game, Jeno let his character die and pushed back from the computer slightly. The laughter died down as the flashbacks of recent events seemed to cross both of their minds. Feeling more response as the older one in this friendship, Jeno was the first to speak up.

“I’m really sorry, Jisung-ah,” he began earnestly. “You have every right to be upset with me. I should’ve just talked to you when things started to change. But I wasn’t being honest with myself either, and you got hurt because of me.”

Jisung remained silent, his gaze distant as he processed Jeno’s apology. After a tense moment, he finally responded, his voice calm but tinged with lingering hurt.

“I know you’re sorry, Hyung. You betrayed my trust, and seeing you kiss (Y/n) that night...it felt like you pulled the rug out from under me,” he replied softly, leaning his head against the chair. 

A familiar pang of guilt surged within Jeno. He knew his actions were inexcusable and he didn’t expect Jisung to forgive him immediately, or perhaps ever. Regardless, he was grateful for the opportunity to offer a sincere apology.

“But…” Jisung’s voice then trailed off, his grip on the mouse loosening. “I understand that you can’t really control who you have feelings for. And after thinking about it a lot, I realize I wouldn’t have known how to bring it up if I were in your shoes.”

Jeno felt a sudden wave of relief crash onto him, filled with gratitude for his Jisung’s understanding. He couldn’t help but be impressed with his friend’s maturity. When had scaredy-cat Park Jisung grown up so much?

“Thank you for saying that…and I really am sorry,” he said, his voice carrying genuine conviction.

Jisung waved him off, his nose scrunching in slight disgust. “Hyung, stop apologizing. It’s getting weird,” he said with a chuckle, reminding Jeno that not everything about Jisung had changed.

The two of them shared a laugh, and Jeno finally started to feel like things were returning to normal. Well, almost everything. There was still one lingering regret that stuck in the back of Jeno’s mind. Although he didn’t say anything, Jisung sensed it too.

As they prepared for the next game to start, Jisung tapped on his keyboard in contemplation before deciding to say something.

“You know, (Y/n) came to talk to me a few days ago,” he said, “I kinda had a feeling before the festival happened, but it’s obvious you both care about each other a lot.”

Jeno found himself blinking in surprise, unsure if he was hearing correctly. Slumping back in his seat, he shook his head in denial. “No…it doesn’t matter. I’ve already decided to step back.”

Especially not after everything that happened. Although his heartbeat still sped up at the thought of you and catching a glimpse of you around campus pulled at his emotions, he didn’t want to reopen wounds that had nearly cost him his best friend.

“It’s okay hyung,” Jisung said, leaning forward with a reassuring smile. “I can tell you really like her. You should be together.”

Jeno leaned back in his seat, his mouse hovering over the computer screen for a moment.

“Are you sure you'd be okay with it?” he asked tentatively.

Jisung nodded firmly, his expression turning serious. “Yeah. But if you hurt her, I won’t forgive you Hyung.”

“I won’t, don’t worry,” Jeno promised sincerely. “Thanks Jisung-ah”

The two exchanged understanding smiles before refocusing on the game. Jeno finally felt like he could breathe again. Now, without having to hold back his feelings anymore, maybe he could have a second chance with you.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ baby steps

Before immediately running to you, Jeno made a conscious effort to wait a bit. Despite Jisung’s assurances— practically fifty times now— that he was cool with it, Jeno still wanted to be cautious. He also wasn’t entirely sure if you still had feelings for him. Honestly, he couldn’t blame you if that turned out to be your response.

It wasn’t until the end of the week, during a club meeting about organizing a fundraiser event for the animal shelter later in the month, that he finally saw you again. The room was abuzz with chatter and plans, but Jeno’s focus was on you. You were seated across the table from him, intently listening to the discussion.

After knowing you for a while, Jeno noticed that you tended to stay quiet in group settings, listening attentively to whoever was speaking. You seemed more comfortable when talking one-on-one or with just a few people. Even then, you spoke softly and blushed easily when you felt the focus shift to you. But he found that side of you to be kind of cute. Actually, he thought your entire personality was quite endearing.

As the meeting finally wrapped up and people began to disperse, Jaemin caught Jeno’s eye. Without saying a word, Jaemin made a not-so-subtle gesture toward you as you packed away your laptop. Jeno’s cheeks burned with embarrassment, but he knew what his friend was encouraging him to do.

After exhaling deeply, Jeno pushed himself to approach you as more people left the room. Determined to take this step, he ignored the way his heart raced with a mix of anticipation and nervousness. 

“Wait, (Y/n)!” He called out before he could chicken out.

Catching your attention, you turned around looking a bit surprised. But you quickly recovered, your eyebrows raising with careful curiosity. 

“Oh Sunbae, did you need something?”

For a second, Jeno’s brain momentarily forgot how to form words. “No, I—uh…I wanted to ask if you have a minute?”

He noticed a flicker of uncertainty pass through your eyes as you nervously gripped the strap of your bag. Nevertheless, you managed a small nod and pulled out your chair to sit down.

Thankful for the lack of a negative response, Jeno took a seat across from you. His fingers drummed nervously against the table as he scrambled to recall the speech he had half-prepared. However, your patient gaze helped him relax a little.

“So, um I met up with Jisung the other day,” Jeno started to explain, rubbing the back of his neck. “We had to talk through some things, and I apologized. He forgave me and now we’re all good.”

Your eyes brightened at this news, and you placed a hand over your chest in relief. “Oh, thank goodness. I was really worried I ruined things for you two.”

He shook his head with a reassuring smile, “No, you didn’t ruin anything. I was the one who made a mess of things. But Jisung was pretty understanding about it all, which I’m grateful for.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” you breathed.

Jeno could hear the sincerity in your voice, which he appreciated. Pausing for a moment, he glanced down at his hands before speaking again.

"He also said that it’s okay for us to be together," Jeno said, hastily adding, "But I completely understand if you don’t want to give me a second chance. Especially after everything that happened.”

It took you a minute or two to digest his words, trying to process this sudden information. Then a small smile began to form on your lips, and he watched as your gaze lowered shyly.

“Well if Jisung is truly alright with it, then I guess I’m open to that,” you replied softly, your smile growing warmer. 

Jeno’s face lit up with relief and a glimmer of joy. “That’s great to hear because…I really like you, (Y/n).”

His confession made you blush, a giddy feeling welling up inside. Though he had technically kissed you first that one time, he hadn’t given a clear response when you first confessed. So you were elated by the confirmation that your feelings were not unrequited.

Being the socially awkward individuals you were, neither of you were sure what to do next. But Jeno stood up first, swinging his school bag around his shoulder.

“If you don’t have anything else planned today,” he asked with a hopeful expression. “Do you want to go grab a meal or something?”

Your smile remained, and you got up from your chair. “If food is involved, I’m in.”

Jeno chuckled warmly at your response, his heart beating rapidly with excitement as he held the door open for the two of you to exit the room together. As you both made your way outside, a moment of hesitation flickered between you. 

With the dynamics between you two having shifted significantly in just a few minutes, you were uncertain about navigating the new boundaries. As both of you internally pondered this, you exchanged subtle glances and shared a nervous laugh.

“Maybe we should take things slow,” you quietly suggested. “Like baby steps, you know?”

Although you couldn’t help but think of that passionate kiss you first shared. Back then, you and Jeno certainly jumped a few levels and things didn’t end that great.

Jeno was quick to nod in agreement, “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”

The two of you stood there for a moment, unsure of where to start with taking “baby steps.” Deciding to be brave, Jeno gently took your hand in his, your fingers intertwining perfectly.

“Is holding hands okay for now?” He asked with a smile so adorable it made your heart flutter.

Trying to suppress your shyness, you nodded tentatively in response. The warmth of his hand contrasting with your own slightly cool one felt both comforting and reassuring. It was like that day he saved you from the motorcycle, his touch was gentle yet protective. Now that you thought about it, you got that feeling from kissing him too. But that type of thing could wait a little bit. Baby steps, you reminded yourself.

After holding back feelings for so long and dealing with some obstacles, both of you found joy in simply holding hands. Jeno hadn’t felt this laid back in a long time.

No more hiding or fighting his feelings. Finally, he could breathe freely and follow his heart.

▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃▃

~ epilogue

Time flew by a lot quicker than Jeno expected. It felt like he blinked and suddenly three months had flown by with you. Since that day, his feelings for you only grew stronger and it felt so great not having to hide them anymore. Jeno couldn’t help but also notice how your smiles seemed brighter when you were together. Once the initial shyness wore off, your conversations flowed effortlessly, deepening your understanding of each other with each passing day.

The weather was getting warmer, and Jeno had fallen into this routine of walking you home after you got off your shifts at the café. The street lamps cast a soft glow, illuminating the path as you stroll hand in hand.

“You know, you don’t have to walk me to my dorm every night,” you said, gently bumping your shoulder against his. “Especially when you have an eight a.m. class the next morning.”

Jeno smiled to himself, squeezing your hand lightly. “Yeah, but I want to. Besides, what kind of boyfriend would I be if I let you walk back alone when it’s dark out?”

You sighed in defeat, realizing it was hard to argue with his logic. And if you were being honest with yourself, you did appreciate getting to spend some extra time with him. Jeno's lips curled into a satisfied smile, pleased that you didn't protest further. A comfortable silence enveloped you both as you walked, savoring the simple pleasure of each other’s company.

“Hey, don’t you think Jisung and Misun are getting closer lately?” you asked, the thought suddenly popped into your mind.

His eyes met yours with a hint of surprise. “You noticed too? I thought I was the only one.”

“Well, Misun hasn’t said anything to me outright,” you mused, “But I catch them exchanging glances with each other all the time.”

Jeno chuckled, knowing how you picked up on these things so quickly. Ironically enough, you seemed completely oblivious to how he used to stare at you all the time before dating.

Nodding in agreement, he added, “Yeah, and apparently Jisung saw Misun’s performance for cheer at the festival. I guess he’s been kind of impressed by her ever since.”

You felt a surge of excitement at the prospect of your friends getting together. Misun had mentioned to you that Jisung was helping her come up with a new routine for her upcoming cheer competition. Those two have definitely been spending more time together, and you were all for it.

“They’d look so cute together,” you sighed dreamily, picturing them in your mind.

Jeno glanced down at his shoes, frowning a little. “But not cuter than us, right?”

Your head turned to see the subtle pout of jealousy on his lips, making you giggle. After being with him for a while, you learned that your boyfriend tended to get sulky quite often. Before your shyness could kick in, you reached up on the tip of your toes to give him a small peck.

Gently stroking his cheek with your thumb, you paused to reassure him. “Of course not. I think Jaemin Sunbae said we’re the type of cute that single people envy.”

Any trace of sulkiness slowly faded from his handsome face, replaced by his adorable eye smile. His strong arms instinctively encircled around your waist, drawing you closer to him. Gazing lovingly into your eyes, he brushed back a lock of hair behind your ear. The familiar unspoken attraction crackled in the air and the two of you leaned in naturally for a sweet kiss.

Unlike your first kiss, this one unfolded slowly, with the passion simmering gently between you. Jeno easily forgot everything around him, one of his hands getting lost in your hair while the other held you securely against him. Meanwhile, your hands rested comfortably on his broad shoulders, delighting in the sensation of his lips guiding yours in a series of tender, warm kisses.

However, you were the first to pull away, knowing that this moment sadly couldn’t last forever. The night was already growing late, and a nagging voice in the back of your mind warned you to be more careful. 

“As much as I’d love to keep going, we’re going to get penalized for missing curfew again,” you mumbled, lightly squeezing his hand.

Jeno frowned, clearly displeased about the abrupt end to the kiss. But he knew you were right. For some reason, your RA was super strict about everyone being in their dorm rooms by 10 p.m.

With a sigh of resignation, he nodded reluctantly and allowed you to start walking again. But Jeno couldn’t be upset for long, knowing he’d have plenty more opportunities to feel your soft, pillowy lips against his. He was a little clingy when it came to you, and thankfully you didn’t seem to mind.

Though Jeno felt pretty miserable earlier in the semester, now he couldn’t be happier to be alive. With Jisung still as his best friend and now having you by his side, he felt like he could accomplish anything.

Being in love had that sort of effect on people, Jeno supposed. And he had a feeling you would agree with him on that too.

●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○●○

previous masterlist -> current masterlist

[secretivemessenger]

Harbingers Lover

Fatui harbingers x top male reader

Rating: NSFW

Warnings: OOC harbingers! Heavy fingering! Nipple play! Squirting! (Pantalone)! Riding! Pet names! Belly bulge! (Tartaglia)! Humiliation! Facefucking! Brat taming! (Scaramouche)! Lab sex! Rough sex! (Dottore)! missionary! Back scratching! Biting! (Capitano)! Manhandling! Soft to rough! (Pierro)!

Note: i know i said i won’t be writing long shit for a while since i had some lack of motivation- BUT, I suddenly got the urge to write this. So yeah 😀. Currently 4am so don’t mind if there is any mistakes

Pantalone

Pantalone adores you a bit too much, he just loves you lots and is willing to give you anything you could ever want.

If you just simply want to ravish his pretty body then he’s all yours, or you just want to buy yourself a little treat then he’s more than willing to give you as much mora as you wish for.

One of the biggest and obvious benefits of being his lover is the things he gives you. He always likes to shower you with his gifts, it can be count as his love language.

And it specifically make him extremely happy when he see’s you wear something he gave to you. it’s insanely adorable how his eyes shone once when you wore the dark blue sweater he gave you.

Just as much as he likes to give you his little gifts, he also enjoys it when you do things for him. Like having you fill him up till he’s a sobbing mess, or just simply pampering and praising him while gently stroking at his hair.

Pantalone can also be very demanding. He is a very straight forward man after all. If he wants something he will not hesitate to get it. So if he wants you to just fuck him dumb right on top of his office then you’ll have to do it. Not like you’re complaining about it anyways.

His back was pressed down against his own desk, pantalone was bare naked for you while you still had your clothes on. The squelching sound of your fingers fucking inside his wet hole mixed perfectly with his sweet moans.

“Nghh…ahh please no more” pantalone let out a helpless cry. But instead of stopping you only moved your fingers faster. “Do you really wish for me to stop? Just say so and I’ll stop” you said with a smile looking directly at his eyes.

Biting his lips he gave it a thought before spatting with an adorable whine “please, give me more”. Giving him exactly what he wanted. You added a third finger and started fucking it in and out of him at a hight pace. His body couldn’t stop squirming around, back arched beautifully for you. He looked so mesmerising in such position.

Leaning down you gave his pecs a little kiss earning you a surprised gasp. Taking it as a sign you took his nipple inside your warm mouth, sucking at it harshly while twirling your tongue around it. Biting it every now and then. All that while still fingering him open.

His body was already an overstimulated mess, he himself was surprised he hasn’t come yet. But once you pulled out you fingers and replaced it with your cock, he couldn’t stop himself from squirting all over himself. He screamed your name loudly as it just kept coming out.

He looked quite fucked up even tho you just put it in. You wonder how would he last when you start fucking him silly with your cock.

Tartaglia

Childe is the definition of the so called puppy boy. Probably because of his little habit of following you around like a little lost pup.

You don’t mind it, actually it’s the quite opposite, you find it extremely adorable the way he stalks behind you everywhere you go.

He wishes for nothing other than your satisfaction. He’s willing to do anything you want and give you everything you need without asking for a thing in return. 

If he were to take anything from you it would be the little praises when he does a good job for you. He finds his own satisfaction from pleasing you. Being a good boy for you is all he does.

He craves your touch all the time, even if he doesn’t ask for it you know that he just wants you close to him in anyway possible, he just wants the heat of your body against him. Still he doesn’t wish to be a greedy one fearing you’ll despise him after.

But in reality you’re more than willing to give him what he wants, after all he has been nothing other than a perfect puppy for you, and a good puppy deserves a reward for their hard work <3.

When you told him he can do anything he wanted with you he got so happy, you actually feared the smile he had on might rip his face apart from how wide it was.

He giggled at himself before telling you what he wanted “i want to ride you, please?” he said with hopeful eyes. And who were you to deny him after being such a good boy for you all this time. “Sure. Go ahead, please yourself”

And there he is, going up and down on your cock. You wanted to help him out but he specifically said to let him do things on his own.

He supported himself by placing his hands on your shoulders while you sat back against the couch. Watching the way he moves on your cock, the way it disappears inside of him and pop up against his tummy. He looked gorgeous with the way his eyes teared up you couldn’t help not to tease him.

Thrusting up against him with no warning made his knees feel weak, it made him squeal loudly. He looked up at you with teary eyes you almost felt bad. You just smiled at him and praised. “Cmon be a good pup and continue moving. Or do you want me to do it” he whined before answering “I’ll do it”.

He continued to abuse his hole on his own as you just watched him like he was some kind of a show. He looked like mess, as his cock leaked lots of precum. Your cock bulging against his stomach was the cutest thing ever, you barely held back on just slamming him on the couch and fucking him on your own. But you have to respect your darling’s wish. So you let him continue on his own, for now atleast.

Scaramouche

Scaramouche is the polar opposite of childe. He is the actual definition of an arrogant little brat, If it wasn’t obvious already.

He has a bad habit of looking down on people especially those who he deems nothing but weak mortals.

He even looks down on you, His lover. Constantly raising his voice at you, ordering you around like you’re one of his subordinates. If someone saw you they would not believe that you have such special bond together.

He’s absolutely not the type to show affection, especially when in public. He feels like falling in love is such a humiliating thing and that everyone looks down on him for it. So he makes sure to act arrogantly with you when there is people around. To show them that he still have the dominant hand.

But do you care about his behaviour? No not at all. He can continue acting like a brat as much as he wants, it just gives you better satisfaction when you start breaking his little pride Till he’s nothing but a putty at your mercy.

He can say whenever he wants to you in public but you know damn well you can very much easily just bend him over anytime and have your way with him.

You seated yourself on the little chair while looking in-front of you as scaramouche stood there, fiddling with his fingers nervously. Why? He himself doesn’t know reason.

“On your knees” you said in a rather calm voice.

Hearing your words made his little ego drop. And it made anger rise in him. YOU want HIM to get on his knees? Just because your his lover you think you have the power to order him around like that. “Huh who do you think you are”

It honestly started to get irritating, and it just made the thought of breaking him grow more inside of you. “Hurry up and get on your knees instead of making things worse for yourself”. Your sudden change in tone made his body shiver, he didn’t know why but his body reacted on it’s own. Swallowing up his pride and getting down on his knees between your legs, letting out a small whine.

“Suck me off” these three words made his face heat up real quick. He looked up at you like you were crazy or something. The shock being too great he forgot how to talk. “You go the easy way out do it on your own, or i can just shove my cock down your throat on my own.” A mischievous smile spread against your face “which one would you prefer hmm?”

Gosh how could you say such things with a straight face. It made him embarrassed, he would never admit it tho. He was too deep in his thoughts to even realize the amount of time that had passed, the patience you had quickly drained. “I guess your choice is the latter”. Your words snapped him out of his thoughts, but it was already too late for him

It’s like his consciousness stopped for a moment and when it returned your cock was already deep down his throat. A little glare was all he could give, but it only made you chuckle at his pathetic move.

If he continues to be a brat then just fuck it out of him, yes it’s that easy. Grab his hair and shove him down till he kisses your abdomen. Watch while he grips at your thighs for support. Tears running down his face uncontrollably, droll dripping down his chin. He looked fucked out already even tho you just started. And you weren’t gonna stop till he’s nothing but an obedient doll for you.

Dottore

Dottore views everything as an experiment, even the relationship you both have was nothing but a mere experiment to him. Until these “feelings” got involved.

Dottore was someone who had little to no understanding of human emotions. Let alone ‘love’. But being with you changed that, you were destined to be with him. Or so he believes.

He believes that you’re meant to teach him all the things that he doesn’t know or understand. And with time he became obsessed with you, so much to the point where he’s willing to take anything your able to give to him.

You’re his just like he’s yours. He won’t mind being your little toy, as long as you keep teaching him all these new things. Especially about his body. Together you explored all the parts of his body that could give him the feeling of euphoria.

Learning all of these new things about his body was certainly interesting, not just for him but for you too. You observed the way his body would react to every touch you make on it.

His reactions always leaves you in aww. No matter how many times you fuck him dumb it would always feel like the first time.

Fucking him in his lab is always hot. Knowing that anyone could possibly enter, a fatui agent, a harbinger, or one of his clones. But thats the fun part of it.

Pressing his face against the wall, while you thrust in and out of him. One hand holding his waist, and the other pulling on his harness.

His muffled up moans is all he could let out as you continued to ram his used hole. He couldn’t stop his hips from pushing back against you. Begging for even more fraction. “Please sir.. fuck me harder” he said while looking back at you with temping eyes.

Snapping your hips against his harshly while pulling back his harness. It made his eyes roll back from the pleasure. Head clouded with lust and only one thought, he wants to cum so soo bad. But when he wanted to jerk himself off you thrusted directly on his prostate. It made his hands shoot up to hold onto the wall for support.

You continued fucking against him, hitting his pleasurable spot over and over again. “Instead of playing with your cock, why don’t we see if you can cum with only your ass hmm. What do you think?” you whispered near his ears making a shiver run up his spine.

Letting out a loud breath “fuck me harder then” a mocking smile spread on his face despite the fact that it’s soaked in tears and drool.

“What a greedy whore. Alright you asked for it”. if he wanted it this way then he have no right to complain after about how sore his body feels.

Capitano

Capitano is very much clueless about relationships and such. Because he’s so new to this he knows nothing about it so you’re gonna have to teach him little by little.

Go easy on and don’t rush him. Start by the simple things of how to enjoy some quality time together. A little date, a walk around together, or just having a small chat in his office. Doing that will deepen the relationship you two have.

After you get closer he’ll become more comfortable to physical touch’s. At first small little peaks is all he can do but in no time he was able to last in heavy make out sessions. Grip at his waist and pull him closer to deepen the kiss, listen to how he whines in the middle of the kiss. It’s all new to him to the point of it becoming overstimulating.

He was very sensitive to the kisses you too shared not knowing about the amount of pleasure he can get from other parts of his body. Starting with overstimulating his nipples to ramming your fingers against his prostate. All the new things he started experiencing with you were incredibly overwhelming, yet it felt fucking amazing.

He now looks forward to it everytime that you call him over for some tension release.

You had no idea why capitano called you in first. Usually when you wanted to do anything together you’ll be the one who have to make the first move. Well guess things change.

The moment you arrived you knew why he called you in because of the way he was acting. And you were honestly quite tempted to tease him, but you know better than to do that. Because he can kill you off just as fast. So you jumped straight to the point.

Seating yourself perfectly between his legs, already balls deep inside of him resulting in a deep groan to be let out from him. “Ngh.. hurry up and move already” chuckling at his demanding words “yes sir”. Before starting to slowly pull out till only the tips inside, and ramming back inside.

The satisfaction of being stretched open felt so good. Capitano wrapped his hands around you for support. Digging his nails in your back. “Loosen up a bit. My dick can barely breath” you said w a light laugh.

With a deep sigh. He tried to relax so you can move easily inside of him. Your thrusts started growing in speed bit by bit. As deep moans escape capitano.

Leaning down you started sucking at his neck which added to the pleasure he was feeling. Leaving hickeys all over it before biting it out of nowhere. He would’ve screamed if he didn’t mange to hold himself back. He Shot a glare at you which quickly disappeared once your movement speed increased.

His eyes became dazed as the pleasure was starting to get too overwhelming for him. For someone like him he was very sensitive. It’s truly adorable. It just makes you want to ravish him even more, turn him into your perfect toy.

But maybe you shouldn’t say that out loud. You still wish to hold on to your head after all.

Pierro

Pierro might as well be considered the most ‘calm’ of the other harbingers. He lived for far too long, and has experienced a fair amount of relationships to understand what he’s doing.

A life as pierros lover is real calm and relaxing, you have no arguments, great communication, and a nice relationship overall.

The most struggle pierro have is being the leader of the harbingers. He is always expected to be so strong and smart, everyone thinks that he can and will do everything for the fatui. And he will. Yet it’s still quite tiring.

All the work he have to do always gets him so stressed. he just wants someone to take care of him. Someone to love him. And who else is there for him other than his precious lover.

You’re there to him. you’ll treat him just like he deserves. With love and care. And maybe some roughness too.

You just can’t deny how good it feels when you look down on the 1st fatui harbinger like that. Laying naked, legs spread wide open.

The way you can see your cock go in and out of him had you staring intensely. How you wish to fuck him so roughly but you care too much to mess him up more than his work is doing. You know how stressful his work is, so you have to push your urges and just focus on pleasing your lover. Continuing to fuck softly against him.

Of course pierro noticed you holding back. Honestly his pride was hurt a bit because maybe you thought he couldn’t handle a more rough play. “No need to hold back. I can take it” he said it so confidently. Hearing his words was like a switch.

Flipping him around so easily made a shrinking sound to be let out by him. His face pressed against the mattress while his ass presented itself so beautifully infront of you.

Holding down his waist you didn’t hesitate to push roughly inside of him again. He was the one who told you that you can be more rough. So you did just that. Going in and out of him in such roughly manner made the volume of his voice rise, which was pleasant to hear due to the fact that he’s mostly quiet during sex.

Pierro continued to enjoy the feeling of your cock fucking his hole. He didn’t mind the roughness of your movement, it was actually very arousing to him. Even a man like pierro like’s to be manhandled every once in a while.

🏷️: @gaybitchfx @vyloy

[fountainpenguin]

"I've told the truth, I didn't come to fool ya... And even though it all went wrong, I'll stand before the Lord of Song..." (x)

New Fairly OddParents 'fic today!

50 Words of Dev and Hazel

📖 Read on FFN || Read on AO3

🌃 City Lights AU

✨ More Fairly OddParents 'fics

🎲 Randomlists.com's 50-word generator

50 scene snippets about a snotty rich boy (self-improvement in progress) and an anxious newcomer to the big city (Livin' big and lovin' life) - Set during "The Treble With Rivals" and the week following.

OR, Dev and Hazel go to Tokyo, say hi to Dev's mom, and Dev picks on orchestra kids because #Band For Life.

(First 5 prompts under the cut)

1. Zoo

"Wait… Your dad runs a zoo for the most expensive and difficult animals to keep in captivity? That's so…" Hazel searched a moment for the right word before settling on, "out of pocket."

"My grandpa started it, and it's not without ulterior motives," Dev told her honestly. But even after her very first trip to Dimmadome Zoo, Hazel stood by her belief that maintaining this place was the best investment Dale had ever made.

And maybe, leaning his folded arms against the narwhal exhibit rail, watching her bounce and babble to the pink elephant and green otter plushes in her hands, Dev thought so too.

2. Bear

"Uh, Dev? I don't think this is the best move we could make in this situation…"

"I've always wanted to pet the polar bear cubs," he said, already hopping the fence. "C'mon, Hazel! We have fairies!"

The purple au pair drone whirring behind him let out a groan. "Dev, we HAVE to talk to your dad about installing better railings in this place…"

3. Travel

"COSMO! WANDA! I WISH WE WERE IN TOKYO!!"

"Ooh! Make it a sushi place!"

"Just run!"

4. Heal

✨ 東京 プーフ! ✨

Dev's next slamming footstep plunged into nothing. He flipped forward into frigid water… Except, through the water, like his whole body had just been splurted with gel and wrapped in itchy feathers. And... whiteness. Or pinkness? Dev stretched out a hand, feeling blindly in the rush of twisting space for Hazel, but he'd left his hands with the polar bears and screaming made no sound.

Then the world snapped into place again like a rubber band. When Dev blinked, it was dark… Maybe early morning. He found himself sitting upright on what felt like padded patio furniture, holding a menu in one hand and a purple paprika shaker in the other. Uh. Do sushi places usually have paprika shakers? From the looks of it, Peri had dropped him in an outdoor dining experience on some kind of waterfront, right across from Hazel… and a very confused polar bear. Who also had a menu in her big, clawed paws. Dev lifted his shades and squinted against the hazy fairy lights. Do bears like sushi? I guess it IS made of fish…

Hazel recovered faster. Opening her hand, she hissed to the salt and pepper shakers, "When I said 'We,' I didn't mean the bear."

"You should be more specific," the green shaker griped. But with a glimmer of his metal cap, the bear disappeared in a snappy ✨ Dimmadelphia poof! ✨

"40,000 yen per roll during dinner rush," Peri muttered. "And if I'm calling it out as pricy, that's saying something."

Adrenalin churned like whitewater rapids through his body, so Dev put down the sushi menu and took the deepest meditative breaths he could. Huh- Maybe Mr. Guzman's relaxation lessons were onto something. Hazel leaned her elbows on the table, hand on her forehead. Is she-?

"Are you okay, Hazel?"

Hazel took a big breath of her own, rolling through it like a cat in a sunbeam. She pushed back her hair. "I think so, yeah. It's just being chased across the ice caps by an angry mother bear. No big deal. You?"

"Yeah. I think so. Ihhh." Did she-? Should I-? Ah, too many thoughts bubbling up, overlapping- Dev took the leap; made the move: "I wish all Hazel's scratches were gone."

… Those were just from tripping mid-run while they escaped the bear, right?

5. Impress

"I'm impressed, Dev." Hazel smiled across the table, then tilted her pressed-together hands forward and dropped any glitter and fun in her eyes through the floor. "That was crazy, impulsive, and totally dangerous even for you."

"Uhh… I guess I might've got carried away back there." You know what would be really nice right about now? "I wish I had my tablet," he whispered to Peri, who sighed (as usual- overworked college student he was or what the ever) and poofed up exactly that.

Read on FFN || Read on AO3

[hyp3rf1xat10ns]

Judylwb Idoov PF

"And I thought summer couldn't get any worse."

Living in Gravity Falls was hard enough, what with all the anomalies and the hicks who somehow couldn't see what was right in front of their own eyes. It was frustrating sure, but you love your odd little town....at least you thought you did. Until some little stale Dorito that looks like a child's very bad attempt at recreating a Mr. Potato Head with their favorite shape, decided Gravity Falls was his now and began reeking havoc on your beautiful little town and absolutely destroying it. You thought you were safe...but the thing about Weirdness Waves is that they are hard to outrun with Gnomes and Manotaurs in your way.

When you woke up in a strange coffin, with a weird cat thing trying to steal your clothes, causing you to go on a wild goose chase around the school, it wasn't the strangest thing you had gone through. Neither was the talking mirror. However...what did scare you was the fact that for some reason...Earth didn't exist in this world...

"Is this like what happened to Ford?... Oh god am I gonna be trapped here for 30 years and get...oh whats the womans equivalent to side burns..."

Needless to say Crowley had no clue what you were talking about. You needed to get back. They all needed you! You had to help them!...Unfortunately that wouldn't be possible. eventually however you settled into this new life...the best you could...but most of what was going on reminded you of home. The overblots? Reminded you of that weird haunting at Northwest Manor. Someone trying to legitimately STEAL where you life by making a deal with you? Kinda a reminder of Bill and...to an extent Gideon.

One night, you were sat in Ramshackle. Grim sound asleep on your lap. You pet him gently scratching behind his ears and listening to him purr happily. Thats when you noticed something the tiniest bit...odd...from your mirror...something fell against the floor. You looked down...only to see a little Stan Pines bobblehead...The little trinket brought you comfort. You even put it on your nightstand. Maybe things wouldn't be so bad here after all...and maybe just maybe....you'd get back home and be able to help the others.

(I know that the ending is a little weird but I kinda wanna build on this a little more while I have the motivation to write something...anything about Twisted Wonderland and since I'm also getting back into Gravity Falls? What better way to stir up motivation then combining two hyper fixations :3)

[rosaren2498]

Sweet Dream or Beautiful Nightmare

WARNINGS/TAGS: Fem!Reader (no use of y/n), 18+ MINORS DNI!!!!!! SMUT, Vaginal Fingering, Multiple Orgasms, Vaginal Sex, Possessive!Dream, Possessive!Reader, Violent Reader (Not Towards Dream), Hair-Pulling Kink (?), Creampie, Rescue Fic, Violence (Unsure If It's Graphic, Please Be Safe), They Are Just So Unhinged Guys, Slight Angst (Dream Being Left Alone With His Thoughts Is Rarely Good), Blood, Rough Sex, Nightmare!Reader, Dream Totally Has A Compentancy Kink, As Well As A Damsel In Distress Kink, Claws, Fangs

Someone please inform me if I missed anything in the tags, I'm trying to hard but I've never been good at tagging

Part 7 of the 'It Isn't Abduction If You're Willing' series

I've had this finished (as well as at least two others) for a while (at least a month.) I've had no motivation to transfer any of them, so I apologize for the delay. This is the longest one I have written (I believe) as it's 35 pages on my notes. Hope you enjoy it!

Title is from 'Sweet Dreams' by Beyonce which is basically the song I associate with Dream the most right now. If you haven't heard it, listen to it

---

The day had started just like any other.

Like nearly every morning, you woke in Dream's arms, your head resting on his chest, your body aching pleasantly from the previous night's activities. Dream pressed a loving kiss to your forehead, but you lifted your head with a soft whine, pouting. He chuckled and gave you a proper kiss, slow but deep, tongues tangling lazily; your favorite way to wake up, if you were being honest with yourself. When he finally pulled back, he rested his forehead against yours and you gave him the brightest smile you were capable of so soon after waking; the awe in his eyes made you feel cherished.

You both lounged in bed for as long as possible, enjoying the closeness, the tactile sensation of someone's body pressed against yours, Dream's body. You shared more than a few lazy, hot, messy kisses, and a little heavy petting, but not much more; you were both mostly just content to bask in each other's presence. When you finally extracted yourself from his arms, albeit very reluctantly, you made your way to the bathroom he had created just for you. Most people wouldn't like a dark-colored bathroom but seeing the black, purple, and blue colors never failed to make you think of Dream; you loved it for that alone.

You kept the lights dim when you flipped them - bright light often hurt your eyes and gave you headaches, though they also reminded you of your time imprisoned - as you approached the shower. Said shower was big enough to hold at least three people comfortably, though the massive bath half-sunk into the floor across from it could hold five people. Maybe you would take a bath later; for now, you turned the shower on, letting the water get hot before stepping under the spray. You shuddered at the heat of it as the water rolled down your body, relaxing your sore and aching muscles; Dream always left you sore in the best ways.

As you began washing your body, you traced the bruises and hickeys that you could see, smiling at the sight of them. Most people seemed to have an issue with being marked; you had never understood why. For you, the bruises and hickeys were reminders that you were wanted; that you were loved. The fact that Dream enjoyed leaving them thrilled you.

You didn't jump when arms wrapped around your waist from behind, merely sighing contentedly and leaning back in Dream's embrace. You stood there together for a quiet moment - as neither of you had any need to speak - before he grabbed his shampoo. He began to massage it into your hair, nails lightly scratching your scalp as he did, causing a happy hum to leave you. Once the shampoo was rinsed away, he lathered your hair in conditioner and left it to sit for a bit. You took the opportunity to turn around, shifting the both of you around until he was under the spray. When his hair was sufficiently wet, you grabbed your own shampoo; you both did so love smelling like each other. He ducked his head just a bit and you smiled, returning the gentle care he had easily offered. When his conditioner was in, he rinsed yours out and then you began to gently wash his body, placing soft, open-mouthed kisses everywhere you could reach.

When you were both completely clean, you kissed him. Dream tugged you closer by your waist with a pleased noise, wrapping his arms around you again. The kiss quickly grew heated and you whimpered into his mouth when one of his hands slipped between your legs. He slid his finger along your slit and you pulled away from his mouth just enough to pant, fighting the urge to rock your hips. He slipped a finger into you and you moaned softly, your eyes fluttering. You bit your lip as you rocked against his finger in little motions, unable to help it; when he added a second one, your knees nearly buckled at the lick of pleasure up your spine, but his arm around your waist kept you upright. He shifted, crowding you against the water-warmed tile and you moaned his name as he began steadily fucking you with his fingers.

"Always so wet for me, little dreamling."

Your breath hitched and you whimpered.

"Only for you."

His possessive growl had you shuddering and clenching around his fingers. He added a third, and you couldn't contain your breathless cry of pleasure when he curled them inside you. His fingers were long, like an artist's, which allowed him to easily rub against that spot inside you that had you seeing stars; or maybe that was just his eyes.

"Yes." The word came out almost as a growl. "You are mine, and only mine, forever."

Your body began trembling as your orgasm rushed towards you embarrassingly quick, high-pitched whimpers and moans filling the room.

"Yes, yes, yes! Yes, I'm yours. Always yours, only yours." You gasped for breath, whining as he curled his fingers again; your mouth was quickly getting away from you. "My Dream, my North Star. I belong to you in a way I have never belonged to anyone. I swear that I will never belong to anyone else ever again; just you."

Your voice was beginning to tremble with the effort it took to speak around your pleasure. You allowed your head to fall back against the tile, looking up at him, at your North Star. His eyes were wild with a possessiveness that would scare - and had scared - anyone else, but not you. You would never be afraid of how much he felt, you reveled in it, for you felt the same. "I am yours, as you are mine. No other shall get to see you like this. No other will get to feel your fingers inside them like this. No other will have your heart as I do." You placed your hand over where his heart was, the heart he didn't need, but manifested just your you.

Dream kissed you until you were dizzy with it, your head spinning with pleasure. When he pulled back, his free hand left your waist and slid up your body, resting at the base of your throat, fingers against your rapid pulse; he didn't squeeze, but you still shuddered, another high-pitched noise slipping from your mouth. He brought his lips to your ear, his voice a deep rasp. "No one will ever see your beauty as you cum, trembling, and shaking, and crying. None but me." He gave a vicious twist of his fingers, rubbing cruelly against that special spot, and the coil in your belly exploded. You rose his fingers through your orgasm until you were a panting, shaking, and trembling mess just like he wanted. When he finally removed his fingers, he immediately sucked them into his mouth, cleaning them off; you whimpered at the sight and he flashed you a smirk.

"Menace." Your voice was still shaky, but you couldn't bring yourself to mind. Not when he kissed you again, and certainly not when he dragged one of your legs up and around his waist, rocking his hips just enough to rub his cock against you.

"I would have you again, fill you like I know you enjoy, if you would but allow it."

You shuddered and nodded rapidly, using the leg now around his waist to pull him even closer; you couldn't have given less of a fuck about the fact that you had just gotten clean. "Yes, yes, always. I could never deny you anything, my love, least of all your pleasure."

His deep groan had yet another shudder racing down your spine, then he was pushing into you in one smooth stroke, burying his cock to the hilt. Your back arched off the tiles as you moaned loudly, pressing your chest against his. His hand left the base of your throat, sliding back down your body to grip your waist again to keep you upright; he rolled his hips in slow thrusts, punching moans and whimpers out of you each time he sank in to the hilt.

You panted into each other's mouths, sharing breath as your eyes locked; you couldn't look away from the sheer intensity in his eyes; you didn't want to look away. You slid one of your hands into his wet, silky hair and tugged, crying out when he groaned deep in his chest and gave a particularly harsh thrust; oh, you wouldn't last much longer. You threaded your other hand into his hair and then tugged with both hands. You enjoyed the growl that slipped out of his mouth almost as much as the way his thrusts turned rough, the wet sound of skin slapping against skin echoing against the tile' the slick slide of your bodies was downright obscene. Your sounds were quickly turning breathy.

"Dream, my Dream, please. Cum inside me, fill me up. Need it, Dream. Need to feel your spend coat me from the inside, like a claim, need to feel it dripping out of me because there's so much of it that I couldn't possibly hold it all inside. Please, I'm so close."

A dark, guttural noise slipped from his mouth, causing a shiver to race down your spine and you to clench around him. You felt his cock twitch heavily inside you before feeling the sudden rush of hot liquid and a desperate cry left you as your orgasm swept you away. Dream didn't stop, fucking both of you through your orgasms until all that was left were little aftershocks that had you clenching erratically around his cock. You could feel his cool breath against the heated skin of your neck as he panted, causing you to shiver as you tried to get your own gasping breaths under control. When he finally, slowly, pulled his cock out, you felt a gush of liquid down your thighs that had a high-pitched whimper tumbling from your mouth. He smirked before kissing you, delving his tongue into your mouth to taste you; you kissed back eagerly.

"I'm going to feel that all day."

Something that could only be called a purr rumbled through his chest, and his smirk turned outright wicked. "Good. I want you to spend the whole day thinking of me. And when we're no longer busy, regardless of where you are, I am going to find you and fill you again and again. When you're full to the brim, I will put a plug in you so that not a single drop escapes. You will sleep with my seed buried as deep into you as possible and come the next morning, I will add more."

You whined, squirming at the thought, pupils dilating. "Promise?"

He kissed you passionately, harshly, sucking on your tongue before pulling back. "I swear."

---

After cleaning up, again, you went your separate ways for now. Dream had Kingly duties, dreams and nightmares to create, and you had promised to help Lucienne in the library; a ton of new books had appeared and they needed sorting. It was several hours before you saw him again, though it had felt like an eternity - as being away from him always did - and you accepted his greeting kiss with relief. Unfortunately, for both of you, he was not quite done with being a king for the day - there were a few particular books he needed to check - but you simply sent him to his throne room with the promise of getting the books for him; you absolutely loved doing anything you could for him. Once gathered, you made your way to the throne room, to him, humming a song from the Waking World under your breath.

You pushed open the doors and made your way to the base of the stairs. Dream was perched on the fifth step, robe spilled out around him; you couldn't help but admire the veritable night sky you could see inside. You would never get over the fact that he sat on the stairs that led to his throne, rather than the throne itself when he didn't have to be political; it was both adorable and sweet. You handed him the books, getting a chaste kiss as a thank you. You turned and began making your way back to the doors of the library, freezing mid-step at the abrupt feeling of wrongness that flooded your awareness like ice. You heard a sharp intake of breath and a small thud as pain and panic, feelings that did not belong to you, thrashed in your head. You whipped around to see the books on the floor and Dream hunched over, the edges of his form blurring.

"Not... again."

You were confused for only a second, crying out for him as you quickly realized what was happening. No, no, not again! Don't do this to him again!! He was gone before you could close the distance, and as you felt that precious bond between you go completely silent, you s c r e a m e d.

---

Dream awoke feeling dizzy. He'd fought the pull of the summoning spell with all his power, but it had dug into his very core, hooked him like a fish and he was powerless to stop it. He couldn't feel his power, and his chest - and the back of his head - felt empty in a way he'd never experienced; as if something he'd never noticed was there was suddenly gone. It wasn't the emptiness of being disconnected from the Dreaming, nor the collective unconscious; he was intimately familiar with the feeling of that after a century, and that feeling had already settled in his gut. No, this was a hollow feeling, an emptiness that was like he'd been cut off from something else. Something potentially more important, something vital that he truly hadn't even known was there; it left him feeling bereft.

The first thing he saw when he opened his eyes was the cursed golden binding circle; he suddenly wished he had found the grimoire before and had burned it. The second thing he saw were the three people standing just outside it, staring at him; the one standing slightly in front of the others was eying him gleefully, while the other two were studying him warily. A quick glance around revealed a mostly bare room; it was clear that he was in yet another basement.

Once they realized he was awake, he learned their names - Mark, Tristan, and Ryan - and that they had found the grimoire, deciding to summon Death like Burgess had tried to before them. It seemed Burgess had never explained that the summoning spell had never caught Death; it figured he wouldn't admit to his own mistakes. However, they seemed to know even less than Burgess had about what they were doing, or even who he was. Unfortunately for him, as long as the binding circle remained intact, there was little he could do. He refused to answer their questions or demands, giving them the same silence he had given Burgess. Eventually, they grew bored and irritated and left the room; they left no guards behind to watch him and he was, thankfully still fully clothed; he would have already used his sand to escape, but he knew it wouldn't work with the binding circle intact; he couldn't use his sand without access to his power. He shifted in the circle to get more comfortable, settling in to wait. He would not need to wait long; surely you would come for him.

---

Time passed excruciatingly slowly. His new captors came down frequently, demanding the same gifts that Burgess had demanded of him, but he merely glared silently at them whenever any of them showed; while Mark and Tristan were clearly shaken by his rage, Ryan was not to be deterred and refused to let the other two leave. He, once more, could do nothing but think. The more time that passed, the less certain he was that you would come; why would you? He had taken you from your home realm, against your will, and had claimed you as his without a thought as to whether it was what you wanted; he knew it was wrong and yet he had still done it. Surely you were happy that he was gone.

His captors were getting more angry with his silence now; or rather, Ryan was as Mark and Tristan seemed to only get more and more freaked out; he couldn't deny he felt a bit of pride at that. Ryan shouted at him, cried that he had captured him by the laws of magic and that Dream owed them boons now; that Ryan owned him. It made him furious, made him feel sick, but still, there was nothing he could do.

He was unsure how much time had passed when he suddenly heard the flutter of wings; his captors were not in the room at the moment and he'd lost track of how long it'd been since he'd last seen them. His head snapped up and his heart dropped into his stomach when he saw Matthew creeping closer to the edge of the circle.

"Don't worry, Boss, help's on the way. We'll get you out."

Dream barely registered the words, too panicked by Matthew's appearance; he could only see Jessamy's determination to free him, see her blood splattered on the glass sphere that had kept him imprisoned.

"You have to leave." It isn't safe, he didn't say. They will kill you, he thought.

Matthew cawed in protest. "I'm not leaving you alone down here! They're right outside the house, and I'll keep out of sight, but I'm not leaving you."

He watched as Matthew flew around the edge of the circle until he was at the back of it, hidden from the view of the doorway by Dream's body; who were the they that Matthew spoke of?

Less than a minute later, the very foundations of the house shook. His captors spilled into the room, two - Mark and Tristan - gripping guns in shaking hands while the third, the leader Ryan, held a knife tightly in his hand. Matthew kept still, and silent, behind Dream as Ryan stalked over to the circle, scowling; Dream could have laughed at the attempt to intimidate him.

Before Ryan could speak, the house shook again and the door to the room was practically blown off its hinges; Ryan spun around to face the door as the other two raised their guns; they looked like they were going to piss themselves any second except for Ryan. Shadows were spilling into the room from the open doorway, shadows much like Dream's own, but these swirled with deep blues and purples that he'd never seen in his own before; a veritable galaxy of color amongst the black. Then, a voice rang out, echoing with power.

"Release him."

It was a voice he recognized, and he would've sobbed in relief at hearing it if he weren't more than a little confused.

Ryan snarled. "We have captured it by the laws of magic; it's ours!"

A growl reverberated so loudly, so strongly, in the room that Dream felt it in his chest. He caught the sound of two other growls, quieter but no less furious; one more animalistic while the other more human.

"He does not belong to you. Release him or you will meet an end so cruel, the devil will weep."

He shuddered at the barely contained fury and possessiveness in his Queen's voice. When none of his captors made a move to free him, the shadows in the room - still with those strange and beautiful colors - began to form a familiar shape. Directly out of the shadows stepped his Queen, but you looked... different.

Shadows dripped from your form, and your hair moved and shifted in the air, defying gravity like you were underwater; there were swirling blue and purple inch-long claws tipping your fingers. The breath in his throat, the breath he didn't need, hitched when he saw how your eyes glowed with the white-hot fury of a thousand stars. Was this what he looked like when he was angry? He'd never seen anything more stunning.

He choked on a panicked shout when two gunshots rang out, but it took him a moment to realize the cries that followed were not from you. The two captors that had been wielding guns were now on the floor clutching at their respective calves, which were spilling crimson blood onto the floor; the shots had come from the doorway, still cloaked in your shadows. He watched, startled, as Ryan stalked forward, surely stupid rather than brave. Dream heard the sound of a blade slicing through air and then Ryan grunted in pain; a very familiar knife was sticking out of his right thigh.

Dream settled back to watch in awe as you advanced on the human now kneeling on the floor; Ryan pulled the knife out with another grunt and tossed it to the ground, giving you a pathetic snarl that cut off quickly when you wrapped a hand around his throat. Dream felt heat slowly creeping up his neck and spreading across his face as he watched, heavy-lidded, as you lifted Ryan clear off the ground, as you defended him. No one, save for Hob in 1789, had ever defended him before: it was just as heady a feeling now as it had been then.

You allowed a dark growl to fall from your lips as you held the stupid human by his throat, baring a mouthful of fangs rather than human teeth. "You dared to take what is mine. Dared to steal my King right in front of me." You dragged a claw down the human's cheek, and Dream couldn't repress his pleasurable shudder as blood welled up from the ragged cut. "Death is too kind for the likes of you. Your friends, oh they will die, but you... your mind will be trapped in our realm, hunted by our nightmares, by me, and you will be torn to shreds over and over again until your body, here, gives out. Then, and only then, will you finally know peace. We will make Hell feel like Heaven."

Your shadows rushed out, enveloping the man that began screaming as soon as they tuched him, before he abruptly went limp in your grasp; you dropped him without care, turning to the other two. They immediately burst into pleas for mercy but you merely ignored them, advancing on the closest one. You dug your claws in and tore at his flesh; his scream had Dream shuddering again as he watched you tear and rip both of the remaining humans o shreds; there was little left of them but broken bones, blood, and strips of flesh. When they were dead, you turned to him, giving him a quick once-over before picking up the discarded, familiar, knife and holding it out behind you.

"I believe this is yours."

Dream tilted his had at you before, through the still-shadowed doorway, Corinthian stepped into the room, immediately followed by Hob: your shadows had kept them hidden from view, kept them safe. Oh, he loved you so much.

Corinthian silently took the knife, cleaned the blood off, and put it back in his holster; both he and Hob looked almost as murderous as you did. Your voice rang out again.

"We cannot break the biding circle; you'll have to."

Hob didn't hesitate to step forward, dropping to his knees and ripping his jacket off to use it to scrub at the paint on the floor; the material gave way quickly enough and Dream gasped sharply as his power flooded through him once more. What nearly made him cry out was the bond - the bond he hadn't even realized you had - bursting open in his chest and the back of his head, your feelings filling him; a protective fury, the likes of which he had never felt before, whirled through him, quickly followed by desperation and a relief that nearly choked him. Then, he was in your arms, your hands - still ripped in those beautiful claws and dripping with blood - caressing his face oh so gently.

"Are you alright? Did they hurt you?" Your hands trailed over his body, gentle as a feather, checking for any wounds.

He could resist no longer and dragged you bodily into a fierce kiss. He shoved his tongue into your mouth, curling it around one of your fangs with a deep, vibrating groan. When he pulled back, he was panting. "You are... magnificent."

You practically purred at the praise even as you jerked your head towards Hob and Corinthian. "You should thank them. Corinthian kept me from tearing the entire world down while trying to find you, and Hob managed to track the grimoire down; it's how we found you. I was beside myself the second you vanished; I'm sorry it took so long."

Dream shushed you softly, pulling you into his embrace with a shuddering sigh. He looked over your shoulder at his dearest friend and his little nightmare. "Thank you both; I will not forget this."

Hob smiled and nodded once. "No need to thank me, my friend."

Corinthian, however, seemed startled. He suddenly shrugged, affecting a look of indifference. "Couldn't exactly have her ripping all the realms apart."

Dream smiled at his masterpiece. "Still... thank you."

Corinthian visibly hesitated before nodding once with a quick jerk of his head. "You're welcome, my Lord."

You nuzzled his chest, voice soft when you spoke. "Home?"

Dream tightened his arms around you. "Yes. Home."

---

Less than half an hour later, having gotten Hob home safe, and sent Corinthian and Matthew off to do their jobs, you and Dream were finally back in your chambers. A week. He'd been missing for a week, and though it technically wasn't a long time, it was far too long for you. It was taking every ounce of self-control you still had to not pounce on him; you'd missed him more than you'd ever be able to explain but you figured he'd likely need some time. You were just about to make a move towards the bathroom in order to wash the blood off you when Dream pounced on you, pushing you onto the bed and crawling over you like a predator; it sent a pleasurable shiver rolling down your spine.

"Do you have any idea how stunning you look right now? I hadn't even realized we were bound, let alone that you could wield my power with such ease."

You moaned as he devoured your mouth in a desperate kiss, shoving your tongue into his mouth to finally taste him. You clung to him, keeping his body pressed tightly against yours even as your clothes vanished into sand. He pressed you back into the bed, eyes like the black void of distant space from side-to-side, twin stars shining where the pupils would be. You automatically spread your legs wide for him and he settled between them like it was where he belonged.

"You're absolutely gorgeous. Covered in the blood of those who would have done me harm, wielding my power like you were born for it.... Breathtaking. My sweet dreamling, my beautiful nightmare."

You shuddered and whined, power no longer echoing in your voice, though you still had claws, your hair was still wilder than ever, and your eyes still shined like his. "Please, I can't wait; I need to feel you."

Thankfully, he didn't make you wait any longer, plundering your mouth as he buried his cock as deep inside you as possible. Your back arched at the sudden burn of the stretch, but you only moaned desperately. You clung tighter to him, smearing still-drying blood along his skin as he started an almost punishing rhythm; it was clear that any control he had was long gone. You traced a path along his skin with your too-long-to-be-human tongue, following the trail of blood you had left behind, licking him clean and causing him to growl. His hand threaded through your hair and he pulled your head back sharply, muffling your loud moan as he shoved his own not-quite-human tongue into your mouth, chasing the iron tang of the blood.

You rolled your hips in time with his, meeting him thrust for thrust, the slap of skin-on-skin contact loud in the room; fuck, you had missed him so much. You sucked on his tongue and smirked when he abruptly pulled back with an absolutely wild look in his eyes. He growled deep in his chest, his free hand gripping your hip tight enough to bruise; you hoped it would. The hand still in your hair yanked your head further back - far enough that your back arched with it = and latched onto your neck, biting and sucking marks almost viciously into your skin as he fucked into your harder. You dug your newly-acquired claws into his back, dragging them down and ripping an absolutely filthy growl from his mouth that caused you to shudder; you whined high in your throat at the sharp scrape of fangs that you knew he didn't have seconds before, clenching around his cock; you kind of hoped he'd bite you, hard enough to draw blood.

You could feel the pressure in the air as his power rose, could taste the slight humanness of him that usually lingered vanish completely when he kissed you again; you let the power resting inside you rise to meet his, intertwining in the air like silver ribbons. You rocked your hips into his, both of you chasing your pleasure, gasping and moaning into each other's mouths due to how rough and desperate you both were.

You keened at a particularly deep thrust, pulling away from his sinful mouth to speak. "I'm so close." Your voice was hoarse and breathless, but you continued nonetheless. "Please, can I cum? Please let me cum, my Dream, my North Star, please."

Dream gave a deep groan, snapping his hips harder into the cradle of your thighs, causing your back to arch again. "So good for me, asking permission. Yes, yes my love, cum for me."

You didn't need anything more than his permission, that coil in your belly, which had been tightening, snapping abruptly as soon as the words left his lips. You gasped his name as your orgasm crashed into you, sweeping you away in a tidalwave of pure bliss. You whimpered when Dream's hips stuttered once, twice, and then he buried his cock deep inside you, head thrown back with a silent cry as he came. You clung to each other in the aftermath, hands roaming each other's bodies as if reacquainting yourselves, gentling each other. You pressed your mouth to his in a loving kiss and he sighed blissfully into the kiss. Without pulling out, he carefully rolled you both onto your sides, holding you as close as possible. As most of your more inhuman features finally faded, until only the stars in your eyes remained, you traced random shapes over his heart before giving his chest a small kiss. You met his curious gaze and allowed that power to bleed into your voice once more.

"I will never allow anyone to hurt you, and I will never allow you to be taken from me; I would slaughter any who dare attempt either. I will never allow anyone to take me from you, nor will I allow anyone to get in between us. And if something happened, something like this, I would fight to get you back, or fight until I was returned to you. I would fight with teeth or fangs, nails or claws, with every last breath in my body, and I would not rest until we were safe in each other's arms again. I will always come for you, and I will always come back to you, because you are mine, and I am yours."

You felt more than heard his breath hitch as he tried to pull you even closer, despite no space actually existing between you. He took a shuddering breath, and then spoke.

"I swear to never doubt your love, and to always love you in return. I will never allow harm to come to you, and I will punish all who attempt to do so. I will never allow myself to be taken from you, nor allow you to be taken from me. And if we are separated, I will not know peace until we are reunited once more. I will protect and love you as fiercely as you would protect and love me. For you are mine, as I am yours."

Both of your oaths rang with power, and you felt them twine around you, settling into your skin with a shudder.

"I love you."

"As I love you."

You shared another loving and gentle kisss, then settled, allowing your bodies to relax for the first time in a week. You were more than content to simply hold each other once more, everything else could wait; right now, you needed to hold, and be held by, him.

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

Hi I hope you're doing well! I'm back again with some nightly thoughts haha

I was thinking, at morning when you're still all sleepy and without any motivation to start the day, Foul Legacy would probably want you to stay home to cuddles. But he's aware you need to go for the day, so instead he decide to take you in his arms and helping you with everything until you feel awake enough

Just him being sweet and gently nudging you out of bed only to reward with you with tons of cuddles at the end of the day

ohh my goodness that's so cute. if i could wake up next to Foul Legacy i'd be able to get up early no questions asked

he rarely ever wakes up before you- often enough you've already gone to work by the time Legacy gets up- but today's the rare morning where he blinks awake before you, admiring your peaceful expression as you get a few more minutes of sleep. he glances at the clock- nearly 7:30- and leans in to gently nudge your cheek, purring quietly. you let out a groan and turn over, snuggling close to Foul Legacy, and for a moment he wants nothing more than to keep you in his arms for the rest of the day. but he gives you another soft nudge, nibbling at your fingers until you sit up, rubbing your eyes tiredly. you sit in his arms for a few minutes, slowly waking up as the sun continues to rise, then hopping out of bed with a quick stretch. it's cold today, and you shiver, sourly wishing you could dive back into Legacy's waiting arms. but alas, work awaits, and with a goodbye and a kiss to your moth monster's forehead, you depart for the day

he waits for you, only you, counting down the hours on the clock until your return. Legacy's eye glimmers in delight when he hears the door unlock, rushing over to greet you with an overjoyed hug, chittering and chirping as you laugh, doing your best to bury your face into his lilac fluff. he whisks you away to the couch once your coat and shoes are off, pulling you onto his lap and snuggling against the crook of your neck with a blissful purr. you reach up to scratch behind his horns, Legacy's wings fluttering at the sensation as his rumbles become sleepy and lethargic. he leans against you, relishing the feeling of you wrapped in his arms- it's the only way he can fall asleep, with you nearby. you pet his ginger hair slowly as he drifts off, a weighted moth blanket over top of you, and soon you find your own eyelids slipping shut as well, heavy from Legacy's warmth

the next thing you know, you're being nudged awake by an affectionate Abyss monster, trilling and tugging at your sleeve for headpats

[industriallyinsecure]

sorry i don’t have any concrete thoughts for this request, I just really wanna kiss & lovingly dote on your monster au ls boys, is that ok to ask for hc’s on?

Risotto is the most difficult one to love on, given the fact that his natural form is literally incorporeal and made of darkness.

He tends to shy away from it, thinking there’s an ulterior motive behind it. It takes a while for him to get used to, but he’s like (literal) putty in your hands when he’s comfortable. He sort of…melts when he’s very relaxed, his body turning into a thick black puddle. A very goopy boy

Even though he loves getting attention from you, he feels like he doesn’t deserve it. You’re a sweet, precious little human, your tragically short time on this earth is better spent elsewhere.

Ghiaccio is also difficult to love on due to his enormous size.

His favorite thing to do is put his head in your lap and have you stroke his horns and pet his scaly head.

You can only pet him for so long before your hands start to freeze

He loves it when you clean his scales or help him shed. It makes him feel less vulnerable but also very clean

Having you tucked under his wings makes him feel like your protector

Keeps a blanket in his cave so the two of you can cuddle for longer without needing to take breaks to warm back up

Melone is one that’s more accepting of your love. He loves to coil around you and have you fight for leverage.

It’s only when you stop humoring him does he completely give in to you. He’ll stretch out to his full length, resting his human half in your lap while his tail lazily wraps around your middle. When he’s feeling very vulnerable, he’ll sit in your lap and loop his arms around your neck, letting you play with his hair and rub his chest and back.

Most of the time it’s a power struggle of you wanting to dote into him and him wanting to love all over you. All of your kisses are quickly returned, so the best way to one-up him is to either steal kisses from him or to do a sneak attack flurry of kisses and subdue him so he can’t move.

Prosciutto has probably already cocooned you up so he can hold you with three arms and read his book with the other, so you’ll be hard pressed to dote on him.

You’ll have to fight through his webs or preemptively protect yourself from being webbed up.

Squeeze him tight in your arms and pet the back of his head and he’ll fall asleep. It reminds him of his days as a spiderling in his egg, snug and safe in his shell. All of his eyes roll back into his head and he clicks and purrs softly.

He’ll try to kiss you but you’ll need to fend him off incase he tries to take control back and dote on you. Peppering kisses over his six eyelids makes him blush for some unknown reason.

Pesci is the most fantastic to love and dote on.

He loves to cuddle in his sealskin and be engulfed by your affection.

He’ll chirp and coo in your arms, nuzzling your face and neck

Very soft and warm

One of his favorite things is when you bundle up with his sealskin

He thinks you look adorable in it

Illuso likes to press kisses the the glass of the mirror but blushes intensely when you do the same.

It's embarrassing to him when you keep a little pocket mirror with you to stare at lovingly.

It might seem insignificant, but little acts like cleaning his mirror really make him happy

Occasionally lets you play with his hair

Formaggio…..floof…. It’s hard to not fall asleep in his big fluffy orange coat.

He loves it when you scratch his fluffy ears or rub his belly, it makes his tongue loll out of the side of his mouth

Absolutely plops his head in your lap when he wants pets

Very good at doing puppy dog eyes at you to get your attention

Often, you two will curl up in front of the fireplace, your head on his side while he curls around you affectionately.

With Sorbet and Gelato, you’d better ration your love carefully. Gelato likes to be the center of attention, but that doesn’t mean sorbet doesn’t want kisses too.

They like to pester you gently in their small faerie forms, floating around you and pulling at your ears, clothes, etc.

Sorbet likes to perch on your shoulder, while Gelato prefers to sit on top of your head

If you manage to catch one of them, you can pepper kisses to them without much resistance. Gelato might try to stab you, though

The three of you spend most of your time in their little faerie castle, bundled up in small scraps of cloth

[chaatandchai]

primrose lane | wjh (UNFINISHED)

hi everyone !! this is a fic i had started writing a long time ago when i had a different account here on tumblr, and over time i lost track of where i wanted the fic to go and consequently lost motivation to write it, too. i'm posting what i've written so far (it's a lot) so people can read if they want.

details: coming of age au, wen junhui x gn!reader, friends to ???, college au, alcohol consumption, i think there's some swearing

wordcount: 19.16k

-- this is my first official post ever on tumblr so please come drop feedback/advice in my inbox or just come say hi !! i'd love to make new friends <3

Maybe it had all started with that newly bloomed patch of bright red camellias.

That was where you had found Seungkwan, crouching among the flowers with his hands over his knees. At the tender age of ten, you could not figure out why he was sitting there like that, so you did what you knew best how to do: ask.

“Um, what are you doing here?”

The boy had glanced up at you like he’d just realized you were towering over him, almost losing balance. 

“I’m playing hide and seek! Isn’t this such a good spot? Jeonghan’s never gonna find me!”

You had looked him dead in the eye. “I could see you from all the way over there. You’re gonna lose.”

“That’s mean! I’m not gonna lose!”

He rose to his feet at this point, and you immediately felt bad seeing the small pout on his face. 

“Okay,” you relented. “Sorry. But it’s true. The flowers aren’t gonna hide you.”

“But —”

He was interrupted by loud footsteps that came quickly down the sidewalk, and a little boy who seemed to be about your age approached the flower bed, laughing delightedly. Behind him was another boy, running a little slower with something bundled up in his arms.

“Seungkwan!” the faster one hollered, almost tackling his friend to the ground. “Found you! See, I told you, I’m really good at this.” Then he turned to you, a little confused and blinking slowly like he’d only just realized you were standing there. 

“Hi,” you’d broken the silence. “I’m Y/N. I live in the small yellow house over there,” you twisted to point somewhere behind you.

“The one with the pretty purple flowers in the front?”

“Yeah!”

The third boy finally approached your little group, and you finally saw what he was holding: a small gray kitten, curled up and fast asleep. 

“I thought that one was empty though,” he said curiously. “Mom said nobody’s lived there for a long time.”

“We moved our stuff in yesterday morning,” you explained. “I’m starting school tomorrow.”

The boys had expressed their joy at this, promptly making you promise to hang out with them more. Friends, they said with bright smiles on their faces. You’d all exchanged names, sitting in the grass watching the sun slowly sink down in the sky, admiring those same red camellias that had just recently bloomed.

At some point you’d scooted closer to the boy holding the now-awake kitten, reaching out to gently stroke its head. His name was Junhui, you recalled, and when you turned to look at him he was looking right back at you.

“He’s so cute, right?” The boy looked fondly down at the kitten. “I wish we had a cat, but my mom thinks we can’t handle having a pet at home.”

“He’s not yours?”

Junhui shook his head. “No. I just found him while I was hiding from Jeonghan. He was all tangled up in the rose bushes, poor little guy. Good thing he didn’t get any scratches.”

You nod, agreeing. “Yeah, that would be bad.”

He watched as the kitten moved to climb over your own leg. “Do you like cats too?”

“Are you kidding? I love them,” you sighed. “I wish I had one, too, but my brother’s allergic so we can’t.”

“You have a brother?”

You wrinkled your nose. “Yeah. He’s two years older than me and he’s really annoying! He thinks he’s so cool even though he’s not.”

“Wow,” Junhui laughed. “Mine is six years old. He’s really cute, but I wish I had an older brother. Like you!”

“No, you don’t,” you told him earnestly. “They’re horrible!”

“Hey, I’m an older brother,” he said patiently. “Am I horrible?”

You looked at him carefully. 

“No,” you answered. “I don’t think so.”

“See?”

“Okay, fine, you win,” you grumbled, laying down on your back. The little kitten had meandered over to Seungkwan, who was trying and failing to teach it how to give a high five while Jeonghan watched and laughed.

Junhui didn’t say anything for a while, but then he turned to look at you again. 

“Hey, don’t you think it’s really stupid?”

“What’s stupid?”

“That this is Primrose Lane but there aren’t any primroses?” He gestured to the flower beds scattered through the neighborhood. “There are camellias everywhere, and there’s a few rose bushes behind Jeonghan’s house, but no primroses. The name doesn’t even make sense.”

You thought about it for a moment. “Yeah, that’s dumb. But it sounds pretty.”

“Hm. You’re right.”

A few more moments of quiet passed by before Seungkwan finally stood, brushing the dirt off his pants.

“It’s getting dark,” he told you. “Mom said I have to be back before it’s completely dark outside. I think we should go home.”

“Yeah,” Jeonghan added from behind him, brushing the dirt off of his shorts. “Y/N, we’ll see you tomorrow right? At school?”

“Yes!”

“Nice!”

Junhui slung an arm around your shoulder and cracked a grin. “Race to the far stop sign? Last one who gets there has to buy snacks for everyone tomorrow!”

“I’m in,” you raised your hand, followed by the other two. “I guess Seungkwan’s buying our food then.”

“Hey!”

Jeonghan broke out into loud laughter, pulling Seungkwan into him for a quick hug. Beside you, Junhui chuckled softly as he prepared to run, shooting you a bright smile as you matched his stance and got ready to go too.

“Three, two, one —!”

Growing up with Seungkwan made you realize that he was far more perceptive than he ever let on to anybody else.

“Jun has the biggest crush on her,” he said suddenly at lunch one day. Your friend in question was picking up his food while speaking to one of your classmates, a girl from your shared science class.

“Really?” You picked up another piece of meat with your chopsticks. “Jang Yeona? I didn’t even know they knew each other.”

“Yeah, but I know him, and I can tell. Look, he’s so far gone already.”

And you weren’t sure why your stomach dropped a little bit when you looked and saw that Seungkwan was sort of correct. You knew Jun well enough, too: you easily saw how he hung onto her every word and looked at her like she put all the stars in the sky. For some reason, it made you a little nauseous.

“Good for him,” you said bluntly. “She’s pretty.”

If you weren’t so intently staring at your food, you would have seen the peculiar look Seungkwan threw your way.

“Hey, what did I miss? You two looked awfully serious from over there.” Jeonghan slipped into the seat across from you, balancing a juice box and a blueberry muffin on his tray.       

“Secretly planning your murder,” you said dryly.

“Oh, cool. At least make it interesting, please.”

“You have become way too comfortable with this,” Seungkwan muttered, giving you both the side eye. 

“That’s because he doesn’t have a choice other than to get used to it,” you explained, placing your share of smoked salmon into Jeonghan’s tray. “You’re all stuck with me now.”

Jeonghan rolled his eyes. “And that’s because when we were ten we didn’t know what a complete lunatic you would grow up to be.”

“He’s kinda right.” Jun’s voice came floating out of nowhere as he took the empty seat beside you. “Also, I will help you plan his murder. Where do you need me to drag the body?”

“To be determined. I’ll let you know later.”

“Noted. Just text me.”

“So,” Seungkwan started, clearly trying to change the topic, “Jun, you’re friends with Jang Yeona now, huh?”

“Eh?” He looked like a deer in headlights, caught off guard with bread in his mouth. “I donfo whafur talkin buf.”

You sent him a mildly disgusted look. “Wen Junhui, please finish chewing that before you speak.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he repeated once his mouth was empty. “She was just asking me about an assignment she missed yesterday. I’ve literally never talked to her before.”

“Uh huh,” Seungkwan nodded along. You could see the gears turning in his head reflected in the mischievous look on his face. 

Of course, you weren’t surprised when Jeonghan picked up on it immediately . “Do you like being around her?”

“Are you guys friends?”

“Do you think she’s pretty?”

“Those are, uh, a lot of questions,” Jun chuckled nervously, nudging your elbow. “Um, can I finish eating first?”

Seungkwan tsked, but left him alone anyways. You knew what he was trying to do, and you didn’t know why you hated the idea of it. Why did you suddenly find the idea of Jun crushing on someone so unpleasant? 

Later that day, you found yourself alone with Seungkwan after the last class, waiting for the other two boys so you could all walk home together.

“You look… down,” he observed, kicking a pebble. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“It is so obviously not nothing,” he probed. “Are you sure you’re fine?”

You didn’t look back at him. “I think so. Just… realized something and I don’t know if I like it or not.”

Seungkwan exhaled and leaned back on the railing, bag falling off of his left shoulder. “Is this about Jun?”

“What?”

“I can’t think of anything else!” He threw his hands up. “Nothing else happened today, unless you did really badly on that math test and you aren’t telling me about it.”

“No, it’s not the test,” you sighed. “I studied way too much to fail that.”

Seungkwan frowned. “Y/N, I can’t help you if I don’t know why you’re upset. And don’t tell me you’re not, because I know you are, and I’d rather you weren’t. I hate seeing you upset.”

“How touching.”

“I’m serious!” He folded his arms. “So it is about Jun, then?”

You hesitated. Even you didn’t really know the answer to that question. Yes it was, but why? What part of it? You couldn’t put a finger on what exactly was bothering you in the first place.

“I guess so?”

“Why, you like him or something?”

You shot him a look, dismissing the idea immediately. “You are so nosy!”

“Well, am I right or wrong?”

“I don’t have a crush on him. That’s stupid,” you insisted, rubbing your eyes. “I don’t really know why I’m annoyed. Just… I know for a fact this is gonna work out for him, because,” you shrugged, “Jun is everything. Everyone likes him. He’s so smart, he’s popular, he’s the sweetest, and it’ll never be my turn because I —”

“If you’re about to say that you aren’t any of those things, I’m going to strangle you myself.”

Again, you glared at him. “I am not opening up to you so that you can threaten me with murder!”

Seungkwan rolled his eyes. “First of all, you’re being extremely dramatic, because we’re in middle school and just because you’re single and lonely now doesn’t mean you’re gonna be single and lonely forever.”

“You sound like my brother, except Mingyu is always telling me the opposite.”

“Yeah, well, Mingyu is wrong and sometimes also an asshole.”

And then you were interrupted by Jeonghan sneaking up and scaring the living daylights out of you, and Jun greeting you with a wave and the book you’ve been wanting to check out for quite a while from the school library. But you thought about it on the way back, silently watching the world around you while the boys fooled around on the sidewalk.

Yes, that was it. You’d just been slightly jealous that you had never been the object of someone’s affections — you weren’t anymore, but you felt that way for a little while, and you sort of hated yourself for it. It was stupid, Seungkwan was absolutely correct, and you needed to slow your brain down and stop worrying.

“Wow, you look exhausted,” Jeonghan remarked, just as the four of you approached your street, that familiar green sign growing closer now. Primrose Lane. “You look like you need a good long nap.”

“I do, and I’m going to take one,” you announced. “Nobody knock on my door until seven o’clock or I will end you.”

Seungkwan frowned at this. “Didn’t we say we were gonna work on homework together at four?”

“Can we do it at seven? Please? Come wake me up and we can work on stuff at my house, my parents won’t mind and Mingyu’s gonna be home late,” you said. “Jeonghan has soccer practice, so he would have missed it, anyways.”

“Fine by me,” Jun agreed. His hand came up to ruffle your hair, something you usually absolutely hated, but for some reason you didn’t really mind when it was him. Actually, there were a lot of things about Jun that you didn’t mind. Things that you often welcomed, in fact, when he did them.

And again, if you weren’t trying really hard to keep staring at the ground, you would have noticed Seungkwan watching you with a concerned look on his face.

“Okay,” he’d said finally, tearing his eyes off of you. (Something was off, but he couldn’t for the life of him figure out what.) “That works. I’ll be there.”

Not much to your surprise, Jun was the first at your door that evening, which also meant that he was the one to see you with extremely messy hair and haphazard clothes. Usually you’d be incredibly embarrassed, but in the moment you were so tired that you couldn’t feel anything other than irritable.

“Did you just wake up?” he asked, removing his shoes and promptly subjecting himself to one of your death glares.

“Don’t even start,” you hissed, marching up the stairs. “Give me ten minutes. Stay here and forget everything you just saw.”

Jun laughed at this, fondly aware of your post-nap crankiness. 

“Okay,” he agreed, watching you disappear around the corner. “I’m gonna get started on math while you’re up there!”

“Good!” came an echo of your voice. “Don’t wait for Jeonghan, he needs to figure out that stuff for himself!”

He only laughed again, louder and clearer this time, and you could hear him from behind your bathroom door. You liked the sound of his laugh. There had always been something so warm and real about the way he expressed his joy that never failed to comfort you as well.

When you’d washed up and finally decided that you looked decent enough to head downstairs again, Jeonghan was sitting at the table with Jun, notebook propped up like he’d only just begun.

“There they are,” Jun clapped. “Finally. You look a little less like a gremlin than when I first got here.”

“I told you not to mention it!” 

You went to punch his shoulder playfully, but he caught your fist, gently encircling your wrist with his fingers. His skin was soft, and comfortingly warm, but the contact caught you off guard and you pulled back sharply, not exactly liking how it made you feel. 

Which was, good. But it was a weird good that you weren’t sure you should be feeling, and you were glad that Seungkwan wasn’t there to witness it again.

Ignoring the slightly hurt look on Jun’s face, you plastered on a smile. 

“Uh, do you guys want something to drink? I’ve got a few cans of soda left, actually.”

Jeonghan raised an eyebrow. “Aren’t those Mingyu’s?”

“Ah, who cares. He can go get more on his own. I’m sick of him bossing me around all day.” You pulled open the door to the fridge. “So?”

“Yeah, sure, I’ll take one.”

Your gaze flitted to the boy beside him. “Jun?”

“I’m fine,” came his clipped reply. 

“You sure? Not even water?”

“Okay,” he relented finally, shrugging. “Just a bit, though.”

Your doorbell rang while you walked back to the table balancing both drinks — once, twice, and then a third time just for good measure. You already knew who it was, just based on how impatient they seemed to be let in.

“I’ll get it,” Jun offered, rising from his seat. He opened the front door to your exhausted looking brother, and Seungkwan who’d arrived not long after him.

“Oh,” Mingyu said at the sight of your friends gathered around the table, slipping his backpack off. “Where’s Mom and Dad?”

“Went to grab groceries,” you answered. “Why don’t you ever take a set of keys with you? You could just let yourself in that way.”

Mingyu shrugged. “Eh.” Then he narrowed his eyes at the can on the table. “Seriously, Y/N, How many times have I told you to stop drinking my soda?”

You rolled your eyes.“It’s one can! And let him have it, Dad’s gonna bring home more, anyway.”

Jeonghan raised his hand in apology. “Sorry, dude.”

When Mingyu was done grumbling and finally left to hole himself up in his room, you plopped back down onto the couch and sighed. “Sometimes I despise him. Exceedingly.”

“Hey, it’s kinda funny watching you guys, though,” Seungkwan said. “Like a soap opera. Except it’s real.”

“I wish I had an older brother,” Jun added gloomily.

“You’ve been saying this to me ever since we met,” you pointed out, still unable to look him in the eye. You didn’t know why. You didn’t know whether you wanted to find out. “And no, you don’t. Be grateful you don’t have to deal with an idiot like Gyu.”

Jun would have said something else (effectively starting another one of your petty little arguments) but Jeonghan interrupted your conversation, tapping his pencil on the table. 

The three of you turned to look at him slowly and were met with a small, sheepish grin.

“Hey, how do you solve double inequalities?”

You hated summer.

Jun loved it, of course, and he could never understand why you preferred winter so much. You let him have that, though, because you liked to watch him be happy. That boy was made to be joyful, you thought sometimes, with how even the smallest of smiles seemed to light up his face. 

So, yes. With a few exceptions, you generally disliked the summer, but this one was exceptionally worse than every single year in the past.

For one, Seungkwan had gone to visit his uncle and aunt in Europe, which meant you would be left without one of your closest friends until the start of the next school year. 

He promised to call your landline every week, and he kept his word, but even that wasn’t enough sometimes. You cherished the time you spent talking to him, but that never meant you didn’t miss him dearly.

Jeonghan was still in town, but you saw him less and less as summer vacation went on, and you didn’t know why. You rarely ran into him anymore, didn’t see him at the park like you always used to, and he almost never answered the door when you went looking for him.

“He’s asleep. Taking a nap,” his little sister told you the one time she’d opened the door instead. You couldn’t tell if she was just covering for him or not. “Do you want me to wake him up?”

“No! No, it’s okay,” you’d said. “Thanks, though, Jeongyeon.”

And as if that wasn’t enough, you’d started to feel like Jun might be slipping through your fingers too. He’d just gotten a cell phone, his mother’s old one that she let him use, and he spent quite a lot of time on it. 

You knew he was texting Yeona — there was no mistaking the smile on his face at every notification, or every time you asked who he was talking to and he refused to tell you, a shy smile on his face.

There had never been anything Jun wouldn’t tell you, at least not until now. If nothing else, this was the clear indicator that something was up with him.

He was still there for you, though, and you appreciated that. As much as he seemed to love talking to Yeona, you knew you could always count on him. Each time you knocked on his door, he was there with a smile, ready to go do whatever you had in mind. 

Maybe you’d just been exaggerating in your head. Maybe you were just a little bit jealous.

You’d confided in him about your worries for Jeonghan too, as you did with everything. (He had always been one of your go-to people, after all.) He wanted to ask Seungkwan for advice as well, but he was on the other side of the world, and the two of you weren’t keen on troubling him when he was supposed to be on vacation.

“It’s okay,” he had comforted you instead. “It’ll be fine.”

And it was fine for the most part — Jun was generally right, and you tended to trust his intuition. This time was no exception. 

You’d both run into Jeonghan not long after on the street, and even though you were least expecting it, you were extremely glad to see him regardless. 

“Whoa,” he said when you launched into him for a hug. “Looks like someone’s very happy to see me.”

“Duh, it’s been a while,” you said, muffled against his shirt. “Where have you been?”

You felt him stiffen for a second. “Oh, you know, just… needed some alone time,” he mumbled. “Lots of stuff going on.”

You chose not to press him further, though you couldn’t understand what kind of stuff could make you hide from your friends for weeks and have your little sister lie to them when they came over.

“We missed you,” Jun added, joining the group hug. It felt nice after so long, and even though Seungkwan was on the other side of the world, you could imagine he was there with you in spirit.

“Were you about to go home?” you asked when you pulled away.

“Oh, yeah,” Jeonghan ran a bruised hand through his hair and smiled tentatively, “but we could just hang out if you want? I don’t really have to be home for another hour.”

That was all you had wanted, really, to spend time with him, and that was enough for you. You smiled watching your best friends fool around and wrestle in the grass (Jun had probably started another argument again) just like you were kids again. 

Even if everything else changed, your constant would be this. You knew that everyone would grow up, and maybe grow away, but your fourteen-year-old heart held it certain that these precious moments would never leave you with time. One day the hastily braided bracelets that sit on your wrists would be gone, but the meaning would never be lost on you.

“Y/N!”

You turned around to Jun holding up his phone directly at you.

“Look at the camera!”

His words came through, and you heard him loud and clear, but you could only focus on his bright, beautiful grin you knew you loved to death. You saw his sparkling eyes, you saw Jeonghan sitting up behind him with wet grass in his hair, making silly faces to try and get you to laugh. And you did. How could you not?

The sun was in your eyes when you smiled, but it could not have been more perfect.

Click!

It had always been extremely hard to keep secrets from Boo Seungkwan, but it was even more difficult to tell him that he was wrong.

“What do you mean you don’t like Junnie? You’re glaring daggers at Yeona right now. You should see yourself, dude.”

Were you? Maybe, but right now you were glaring daggers at Seungkwan, practically fuming.

“How dare you insinuate such a thing,” you hissed, aiming your pencil at him. “I would never develop feelings for my best friend!”

He merely raised an eyebrow and scoffed. “Why is it that you’ve become way more violent ever since we started high school?”

You had to admit that his observation was correct, but in your defense, it was only two weeks into freshman year and he’d already managed to get on your nerves on this topic — a new record that you were sure only Jeonghan had the capability to break.

“Maybe if you would stop acting like you can read my mind,” you muttered, eyes flitting over to where Jun and Yeona were talking yet again. For some reason, you felt bitter about it. 

Seungkwan clicked his tongue. “You’re doing it again.”

“Doing what?”

“That thing where you scowl at Yeona like you think she shouldn’t be anywhere near Jun.”

“Because I do!” you whisper-yelled, making sure nobody else in the library heard you. “She’s nowhere near good enough for him. He deserves someone who can, you know, match his energy and make him happy, but she can’t even put in the basic effort to sound interested when they talk! Isn’t it obvious?”

That seemed to make Seungkwan think. “You know, I never really noticed before, but I guess you’re right.”

You crossed your arms triumphantly. “See?”

“That doesn’t change the fact that he practically worships the ground she walks on,” he added. “I know he won’t tell us how he really feels, but you can’t tell me you don’t see it too.”

“No, I know.” You sighed. “I do. You’re right.”

The look Seungkwan sent you made you feel so vulnerable in that moment — there was a little bit of pity, a little bit of love he had for you as a friend, but there was also that pure sadness. He was sad for you, because you were one of his best friends, but so was Jun. It felt like maybe he wanted to help you, but he didn’t know how.

You tried distracting yourself by downing the rest of your water bottle in one go, doing your best not to look out of the corner of your eye where Yeona was pulling Jun, your Jun, into a tight hug. You weren’t going to look. You shouldn’t. You wouldn’t.

“I’m gonna go insane. There’s way too much happening,” you said, crumpling the plastic bottle in your hand. “God, where is Jeonghan when we need him?”

“Why, am I not helping?”

You shot him another look that was sufficient to answer his question.

“Fair. Well, I hope he’s feeling better,” Seungkwan told you, digging through his backpack. You knew, too, that Jeonghan hadn’t been in school for days — out sick with a high fever, Jeongyeon had told you when you ran into her in the neighborhood yesterday. 

“Me too. I need both of you to survive this hellhole,” you groaned. “Ideally all three, but he’s having his moment with Yeona so I guess I won’t get in his way.”

“There you go, sounding all spiteful again.”

You didn’t bother responding to him this time. Maybe it was because you knew that he was right. As much as you liked to think that he was just coming to random conclusions, you were aware of your shifting feelings. You didn’t like Jun, not like he liked Yeona, you just… it was something different there. It’d changed. When, you didn’t know. It just did.

And you weren’t really surprised when you started seeing them together more outside of school. Your group of four had just dwindled to three now, sometimes two on those days that Jeonghan just didn’t show up. You were happy to have Seungkwan, but the frequent absence of the other two boys never failed to make you a little uneasy.

Because you’d always thought that this would never change, but what if you were wrong?

You let the worry live at the back of your mind. For now, at least. You couldn’t let something so small take over your head, not when you had schoolwork to focus on, and it definitely began to pick up as the weeks flew by.

“By the way,” you said at lunch one day, “what’s going with you and Yeona?”

Jun widened his eyes mid-bite and Seungkwan immediately shook his head like he knew what was coming.

“The last time we asked you about this you avoided the question,” he said. “I think we all know what you’re trying to hide from us, anyway, so there’s really no point.”

“True,” Jeonghan gestured with his chopsticks. You looked at him for a moment and you could swear the cut on his nose wasn’t there the last time you spoke to him.

Jun sighed and set his food down. 

“We’re… not dating,” he said carefully. “I just, I don’t know. I think she’s great. I really like her, man, and I think she likes spending time with me too. So that’s really it right now.”

He looked so happy. You hated that you felt nearly the exact opposite. Sitting there in the cafeteria, you couldn’t help but feel those sharp pangs of guilt that struck you, because what was wrong with you? Why couldn’t you be happy for your best friend?

“That’s great, dude,” Jeonghan laughed as he offered the other boy a fist bump. Seungkwan smiled but said nothing, and he eyed you suspiciously as you pretended to remain unaffected.

“Yeah, that’s great,” you echoed mindlessly. “Really great. Hope it works out.”

From across the table, you locked eyes with Jun. Just looking at him made you feel better; somehow the sight of his face made the uneasiness in the pit of your stomach go away. It was nice, for a few moments.

Then you looked away sharply, because a manicured hand came down on his shoulder as an unfamiliar voice called out his name, and you really didn’t want to watch their… whatever was going on with them.

“Hi,” Yeona giggled. “What happened to lunch together?”

Jeonghan raised an eyebrow and leaned over to whisper to you. “They were gonna eat lunch together?”

“Oh… Sorry, I forgot,” Jun mumbled shyly. “Couldn’t ditch my friends last minute.”

“Aw, I’m sure they’ll live through one lunch period without you.” 

Yeona flashed the rest of you a sickly sweet smile, like she was pitying you, almost. You felt a hot rush of anger flow through your body, and if you had any less self control you would have left the cafeteria then and there.

For Jun, you told yourself. You’re doing this for his sake.

“I’ll sit with you tomorrow,” you heard Jun say. 

“Okay, Junnie, I’ll see you there. Text me later, okay?”

“Yeah, see you.”

She left with another one of her smiles and waved to the three of you, effectively taking any sense remaining in Jun’s brain with her. He sat in silence, quietly eating and smiling down at his tray while you watched him trying to understand why you felt so dismayed.

“Well, that was interesting,” is all Seungkwan said before taking the last bite of his food. You were very glad he didn’t look in your direction, because you weren’t sure you could put on a good enough poker face for him to believe. 

Needless to say, you did not see Jun at lunch the next day. Or the day after that.

Lunchtime without your best friend lasted a long, agonizing forty-seven days. You saw him around everywhere else, and not that you were counting (you were), and not that you cared (you did), but having that empty seat next to you for so long did feel quite off. 

That forty-eighth morning, you managed to corner Jun in the hallway before classes started, a mischievous smile plastered on your face.

“You haven’t been giving us any Yeona updates,” you told him, his back still turned to you. “So? How’s it going?”

“Good,” he said shortly, slamming his locker shut with a loud bang.

The smile on your face dropped immediately. Jun was patient, sweet, and nothing but lovely, but sometimes his temper was not to be trifled with. 

“Whoa. Are you sure, dude?”

“Yep.”

“You’re really not being convincing at all right now.”

He sighed then, and he looked so tired that you instantly felt bad for him. “Y/N, I’m fine. Stop worrying about me, okay?”

And if there was one thing you knew about Jun, it was that he was never fine when he said he was. You could tell from the way his half-smile didn’t quite reach his eyes, and the way he slouched as you headed down the hall with him. Yeah, you wanted to know what was up, but with him like this, you weren’t going to push any further. 

“Okay,” you said quietly. Jun only smiled softly in response, ruffling your hair like he usually always did.

“See you later,” he said, walking off. From where you were you could see Yeona across the hall, nearly glaring daggers at you as she ran a few fingers through her perfectly straight hair. What her problem was with you, you would never really understand, although you were perfectly happy to reciprocate the feeling if that was what she wanted.

While you were deep in your thoughts, an arm came around your shoulder and you almost reflexively kicked the person behind you until you smelled that unmistakable citrus scent, realizing it was Seungkwan.

“You have got to stop doing that,” you warned him. “Or I’ll send you to the hospital someday.”

He just shrugged. “Eh. Your reaction is always worth it.”

“Do you have a death wish?”

Seungkwan didn’t respond, just grabbed your shoulder and steered you away from a crowd of boys you were about to walk straight into at the corner of the hall. 

“Jeez,” he muttered, glancing back at them, “It isn’t that hard to get out of the fucking w— Is that Jeonghan?!”

“Huh?”

“Over there,” he directed your gaze to the distinct yellow hoodie that you knew belonged to your friend. “Didn’t know he was friends with Choi Seungcheol. That’s crazy, man.”

That didn’t need an explanation at all. Nobody in the entire school messed with Seungcheol, and you knew that. He had a reputation, and a whole lot of respect that stemmed from it.

“Who’s that one standing next to Han?”

“No idea,” Seungkwan said. 

You couldn’t not look at Jeonghan; how he looked so small among the group, how he couldn’t stop staring at the ground and the way he loosely held an unlit cigarette in his right hand. It was hard to tell whether he hated it or not. He had always been that way, ambiguous and slightly impossible to read.

You told Seungkwan so, and he only shook his head.

“If he wants our help, he’ll come ask us. You know he always talks to us when he feels like he really needs it.”

And that was correct, so instead of taking a step in Jeonghan’s direction you turned around and walked away instead. You trusted that he would be fine, but what you were less certain about was your fate if you walked into geometry class late yet again this week.

The real surprise of the day, however, came when you arrived at your usual seat at lunch only to be met with Jun sitting to your left, already digging into his box of noodles. You blinked several times to make sure you weren’t hallucinating, then turned to Seungkwan.

“Are you seeing this?”

“I’m just as surprised as you are!”

Jun didn’t look up, or respond to either of you, so you put your stuff down and set a hand on his shoulder. “Dude, what happened?”

“Nothing,” came the monotone reply.

“Obviously it’s not nothing, Jun, how come you’re here? Weren’t you, you know…”

He shook his hair out of his face and looked up at you. “Well, you guys better get used to it again.”

“Wait, are you and Yeona still a thing, or…?”

“Fine,” he sighed. “No, okay? There were a few issues. Will you two stop asking questions so we can sit down? It’s been a month and a half and I just really want to eat lunch with my friends again.”

Jun never spoke to or about Jang Yeona again after that. Every now and then you would attempt to get something out of him, but he absolutely refused to speak about her no matter how hard you tried. At some point, like all aspects of life, it became a thing of the past.

Nobody would be surprised to learn that Wen Junhui’s contact was the first one to be saved in your phone when you finally got one.

It was a beat up, old model that your father had found at the bottom of some drawer, and it barely functioned other than to call and text, but you were content with it anyway. As long as you had a means to communicate with your friends, you were more than happy.

“Who have you been talking to for the past three hours?” Mingyu asked one day, opening your door and peeking through.

You pulled the phone away from your ear. “Jun! Now get out of my room, you doofus.”

“Hah, loser.”

If he thought so, you didn’t care. It ended up being Jun that you called in your free time the most anyways, since Seungkwan had taken up volleyball and Jeonghan was out and about doing nobody knew what. 

He was certainly changing with the years, growing out of the Jeonghan you used to know — a few extra piercings, longer hair, more unkempt uniform. But you just attributed that to the phase of life you were in right now. He still spoke to you often, but things had become slightly more distant.

It made sense. Maybe he needed it. It was best that you gave him space.

You were changing too, all of you. It was just a fact. Seungkwan was three inches taller than you, now, something he took immense pride in, and puberty had hit Jun like a truck.

“You’re literally a tree,” you told him one day. “I can’t believe I have to look up to make eye contact with you.”

“Come on, it’s not that bad!”

“That’s because you’re looking down!”

It wasn’t just his height. His features were much sharper now, and you weren’t sure what on earth he was doing with his hair but you hoped he would keep up with it. He looked good, and you didn’t know if he knew it, but you did, and you were unsure how to feel about that.

A blessing came to you finally in the form of a shared chemistry class with Jun in your junior year. This was a surprise, after years of not being in any together, so you were quite happy as you were looking over your schedules.

“Oh, I’ve got calculus with Jeonghan,” you remarked later, looking at the screenshots your friends had sent in the group chat. “Can’t wait to get humbled.”

“He’s come a long way from needing to be tutored in middle school, hasn't he?” Jun chuckled. “I don’t know how he does it. He’s barely ever in class but still manages to ace the tests.”

“His attendance is pretty spotty, isn’t it? I guess that’s Yoon Jeonghan for you.” You looked at the rest of the blocks. “Do we have literature together?”

“Nope.”

“You’re really leaving me alone with Seungkwan?” you joked.

“Well, I have both physics and art history with him, so I don’t wanna hear any complaints from you, Y/N.”

“Fair.”

As it was your junior year, learning your curriculum was no easy feat. Except for Jeonghan — you couldn’t understand how he was breezing through all his classes — the three of you had your fair share of troubles navigating your course load.

“Between volleyball and calculus, I honestly think I’m just gonna drop dead one of these days.”

“You scored a ninety-six on last week’s test, Seungkwan. You’re doing fine.”

This was the year you ended up making a few new friends through some of your classes, too, since bonding over struggle seemed to be a pretty efficient way of connecting with others. You’d known of Seoyun and Ryu for a few years, but you’d never spoken to them until this year, when the three of you were thrown together for a literature project and none of you knew what to do.

You enjoyed their company. It was good to surround yourself with people you were comfortable with, and aside from the few inevitable bumps in the road, you could say you were doing pretty good for yourself.

Until that one horrendous calculus quiz. 

You’d never failed before. Never. You weren’t the absolute best student by any means, but you were good. An F was something you never saw on your papers, and never expected, but here it was, big and red on the top left corner.

It was more shock than anything else going through your head. You didn’t know how to react, so you just stared down at it until you could feel the tears coming in.

“You okay?”

You looked up at Jeonghan beside you and he immediately winced. 

“You’re not okay,” he decided quickly. “What happened? Bad test?”

“Bad test,” you nodded, hoping he wouldn’t probe further and taking a deep breath so your tears wouldn’t spill over.

“It’s okay. It happens,” he said gently, reaching out to rub your shoulder. “One terrible grade isn’t going to ruin your entire academic career, right? You’re doing fine.”

“But college is right around the corner, and I really need everything to just be right —”

“Don’t have to be perfect to do well,” Jeonghan cut you off with an encouraging smile. “I promise you. You’re gonna be okay, Y/N. You’re one of the smartest people I know.”

“Says you, Han.”

He pushed his bangs back and frowned. “I mean it,” he told you earnestly. “I’m not lying.”

“You really think so?”

“I know it.”

That was able to alleviate your worries a little bit, but when you went home and remembered you had a chemistry test the next morning, you immediately went into panic mode again.

“Hey, Jun?”

“Yeah?”

You balanced your phone on your knee. “Have you been reviewing for the chem test tomorrow?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Do you want to study together? I kinda forgot about it,” you said, embarrassed. “I think I spent too much time worrying about calc.”

“That’s okay,” he said kindly. “Want me to come over?”

He had listened to you rant about your calculus test after school with all the patience in the world, and offered his help if you ever needed it. That was the thing about Jun; he was always patient with you, and he encouraged you to go at your own comfortable pace. You admired that about him.

You let him in happily when he rang your doorbell and the two of you spent hours poring over worksheets and labs, redoing problem sets and memorizing chemical formulas. It was a hard class, there was no doubt about it, but it seemed a little easier with Jun by your side.

Everything did, you mused as you watched him work on a question. Life felt a whole lot lighter when you knew he had your back.

“Wait, I don’t understand why this solution doesn’t work here.”

Jun glanced over at your paper. “Ah, you’re using the wrong formula for two of the calculations. It’s the other one with silicon you need to use.”

“Oh!” you laughed. “Sorry. I can be stupid sometimes.”

“You’re not stupid, Y/N,” he said gently. “You’re one of the smartest people I know.”

“You know, Jeonghan said the same thing earlier today.”

“He’s right,” Jun said simply. “Because you are.”

“I just want you to know you’re speaking to the person who fell asleep walking to class on multiple occasions.”

“Trust me, I’m aware.”

Time passed easily like that with him. It was a wonder, really, how hours could feel like just a few minutes.

“Thanks for the help,” you told him when he started packing up to leave. “I really needed that moral support for a little while.”

“Anytime, Y/N.”

“Sorry about bothering you for so long.” You handed him his bag. “I know this took up your whole evening, so…”

Jun looked at you like you were speaking another language entirely. “Dude, you gotta stop acting like you needing help is a burden.” 

“Are you sure that it isn’t?”

“Not to me. Not if it’s you.”

Jun looked at you sincerely, like he really meant it. You knew that he meant it, which kickstarted something in you that you didn’t even realize was ready to go. It was like something unlocked, finally, and now you knew exactly what had been going on in your heart for the past few years.

The second he was out of your house, you stared at the wall in horror, coming to a belated realization.

“Oh my god, Seungkwan was right!”

The boys had, after some long deliberation, placed bets on who Jun would end up taking to senior prom.

Jeonghan had put five dollars on you and called it a day, after which you called him delusional and an idiot. Seungkwan had decided to one up him and put ten bucks on himself, which you tried to talk him out of while Jeonghan was laughing his ass off, but you couldn’t deter him in any way.

Seungkwan had valiantly tried to defend himself. “Jeonghan’s got the school’s entire female population at his feet and Y/N will end up with some hottie, so obviously me and Jun should go together!”

Jeonghan snorted. “Rethink that part about Y/N.”

You shot him a look. “Just because you’ve gone all classic bad boy now doesn’t mean you’re the main attraction here!”

“What do you think this is for, then?” he retorted, vaguely gesturing towards himself

“Yoon Jeonghan, if you seriously think that scar on your nose and all those chains are doing anything for you, I don’t know what to say.” 

They had tried coaxing out your own personal opinion, but you remained vague, and you certainly weren’t about to put money into their random musings. On top of that, you knew Seungkwan knew how you really felt, and you didn’t want to put any more emphasis on that than there already was.

“We have got to get you a date,” Seungkwan said during physics. “I can’t have you moping around over J —”

“I am not moping!”

“Yeah, right, like you aren’t staring at him right now instead of listening to me or paying attention to class.”

“I’m going to strangle you.” 

“Have fun doing that,” he said, flipping his page, “but I’m not letting you borrow my notes when you call me at midnight because you didn’t take any.”

It was like everything and nothing had changed at the same time, after you had admitted your feelings to yourself all those months ago. You still spent the same amount of time around Jun, and you still bickered and argued like before, but now you were aware of a lot of things you chose not to perceive earlier.

Like the soft touch of his fingers, for example, on your shoulder as he comforted you after a bad day. Like the way he smiled and told you everything was going to be okay. You believed him, because how could you not? This was your Jun, your best friend, and every word he said was a mantra in your brain.

It was such a wonderful feeling, but it stung at the same time, because you knew you were only falling deeper into something that could never happen. 

You couldn’t resent Jun for it. None of it was his fault. You could only blame yourself.

“Hey,” he greeted you at lunch the next week. “What’s up?”

“Well, I just had one hell of a chem class,” you replied, cheeks flushing at the earnest look he was giving you. “Kwon Soonyoung accidentally set the ends of Lily’s hair on fire. It was crazy.”

“Aren’t you supposed to have your hair tied up during labs?”

“You’re also not supposed to fool around holding a lit match.” You took your chopsticks out of your bag. “But it doesn’t end there. Hansol spilled an entire flask of hydrochloric acid on himself and had to go home.”

Seungkwan snorted. “Hansol would do that.”

Jun shot him a look and turned back to you. “Is he okay now?”

“He’s fine. It’ll probably burn for a bit, but he’s gotta shower and wash that stuff off.” You shrugged. “Tell me about your day.”

“It was alright. I feel like I haven’t seen you all morning, though,” he said. “It was weird.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Jun, we walked to school together this morning.”

“I know, I just missed you anyways,” he replied. You made the mistake of looking at him when he said those words, and your breath caught in your throat when you made eye contact, because holy shit was your heart beating faster than ever. 

The sensible thing to do would be to look away, but you couldn’t, because it was Wen Junhui, and how could you not look at the very person who made each moment feel like home?

He opened his mouth again and he looked like he was about to say something to you but Seoyun dropped by just then, inviting you to hang out on the weekend. You would have said it was a welcome distraction, to think about anything but him, but you kind of liked it when he was on your mind.

“I’ll be there,” you told Seoyun, heart doing backflips in your chest.

“Two o’clock, Y/N, don’t forget!”

“I won’t!”

“What are you two getting up to?” Seungkwan questioned while trying to pick up a misshapen sushi roll. 

You winced a little when the wrap started to fall apart entirely. “Just, you know, dress shopping.”

“Oh,” he drawled, and you didn’t miss the not so subtle look he threw your way. You knew exactly what that meant. “You got a prom date now?”

“Well, no,” you admitted, “but I’m not gonna hold off on buying a dress for that. I’ll probably end up going with some friends anyway.”

Jun raised an eyebrow. “Like… us?”

“I meant Ryu and Seoyun,” you clarified. “You’re all gonna end up with dates, so I’m not getting in the middle.”

You could see the slightest disappointment in his face when he processed what you said. “We’re not all gonna go together?”

“Junnie, you’re saying this like we aren’t gonna be with each other for the whole night. Besides, I don’t think Seungkwan is planning on letting you go with anybody else.”

Seungkwan nodded proudly in confirmation.

“Well,” Jun leaned forward in his seat, “I mean, what would you do if someone did ask you?”

The sudden question threw you off a little bit, and you had to take a sip of your water before you could answer.

“Depending on who it is, I’d probably say yes? Ryu and Seoyun already agreed that if any one of us happens to get a date, it’s fine, so... Yeah.” You shrugged. “Why?”

“Oh,” he coughed, shaking his head. “I was just wondering. You know, just in case.”

You gave him an odd look. “In case of what?”

“By the way,” Seungkwan cut in suddenly, “any of you know where exactly Jeonghan is or do I need to hunt him down again?”

You and Jun looked at each other and shrugged, coming up blank, but one of the boys from the volleyball team that had just passed by seemed to overhear you.

“Probably at the back corner of the soccer field smoking with his buddies. Or at home skipping class, but that first one’s more likely, honestly.”

“Thank you, Eunwoo.”

You turned back to your friends, shocked. “Smoking? Jeonghan? Are we even talking about the same person?”

“I’m not exactly surprised,” Jun muttered. “Considering who he’s been hanging out with lately.”

Seungkwan nodded. “Yeah, they can be real jerks sometimes. Now that I think about it, it’s no wonder Jeonghan always showed up with those scars everywhere.”

“Those were from them?!” 

It felt like every day you were learning new things you hadn’t seemed to notice before. How is it that you never saw your own friend suffering?

“I don’t see any other explanation. This is exactly why nobody can say no to Seungcheol and his posse.”

The three of you fell silent, looking at each other with uneasy expressions on your faces. 

“Unless any of you really want to go yell at Seungcheol,” Seungkwan added, “which… good luck with that.”

Maybe you should have intervened back then, but you didn’t know any better. You were used to Jeonghan not needing any of you to look after him; it was always him subtly caring for the rest of you, and it didn’t even occur to you that maybe he needed some checking in, too.

“Well,” you said after a few moments, “I’m gonna head to class now. You guys wanna come with?”

“Yeah!” Jun exclaimed, shooting to his feet. “Yeah, I’ll come. Give me just a second.”

Seungkwan sent you a sly look as he slung his bag over his shoulder. “I’ll let you be,” he said. “Get some alone time.”

“Seungkwan.”

“Maybe you could benefit from some one on one —”

“Boo Seungkwan!”

“Just saying, we are never done talking about this, Y/N,” he replied in a singsong voice before walking away. You rolled your eyes at his back. Typical Seungkwan behavior.

“Ready to go?”

You would never not have butterflies looking at Jun, and this time was certainly no exception. There was no escaping this feeling. He was your best friend for life.

“Yeah, c’mon.”

He smiled warmly at you before ducking through the doorway, and it made your heart skip a beat, even more so when he slung his arm around your shoulders and started telling you about his biology class. It was simultaneously one of the best and worst feelings you’ve felt in your entire life, and that just confused you even more.

It was official — you were so going to kill Seungkwan later.

Thwack!

That was the fourth time over the past few minutes you’d heard that sound against your window. At first, you were set on ignoring it and going back to sleep, but now you were fully awake and very annoyed at whatever was making that goddamn noise.

Thwack!

You swore under your breath, tossing your covers off and marching over to the window. Moving aside the curtain, you pulled it open, and —

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me right now.”

“Hello to you, too,” Jeonghan grinned, like the little demon he was. “Please let me in, it’s so cold out here.”

“What the hell are you doing?” you hissed. “How did you even climb up?”

“I’m good at a lot of things. Now will you let me in? I might fall off if you make me stay here any longer.”

You rolled your eyes at him, but let him climb through anyways, making sure he didn’t knock anything over and cause a ruckus. Mingyu was home from college on his break for the next week and had the room right next to you, and you didn’t want to be interrogated by your brother in the middle of the night.

“So,” you said, arms crossed, “are you going to tell me why you’re in my room at one in the morning?”

“Because you let me in?”

“Yoon Jeonghan.”

“Okay, fine,” he relented. “I really need your help.”

“It couldn’t wait until tomorrow?”

“Nope.”

You couldn’t at all understand why he was being so vague. “Alright. Shoot.”

Jeonghan watched you for a second then shoved his hands into his pockets.

“Go to prom with me.”

“Eh?” You raised your eyebrows. “Me? Why? Wait — ”

“As friends,” he said quickly, raising his hands. “Let me just clarify that first.”

“Okay, good to know,” you said, relieved. “Han, this really couldn’t have waited until tomorrow?”

“No! What if you already had a date tomorrow?”

“And why do you have to go with me of all people?”

“Because, well…” He trailed off and shrugged. “I mean, I don’t have plans, and you don’t have plans. Yet. Also, Taehyung is trying to set me up with someone and I really don’t want to go with her.”

This piqued your curiosity. “Really? Who?”

“Lee Hyojin.”

“Ohh,” you said, understanding why. “Yeah, you two haven’t gotten along since middle school. Bad idea.”

“Yep.” He rubbed his hands together and pulled them further into the sleeves of his jacket. “So, what do you say?”

“Didn’t you bet Seungkwan that it’d be Jun taking me to prom instead?”

He thought about this for a moment, then said, “Yeah, but he’ll lose too, so I’ll get my five dollars anyway. It doesn’t matter.”

You were still slightly reeling from how random it all was, but… it was Jeonghan, after all, and he was right that neither of you had plans, so why not?

“You know what? Alright,” you gave in. “I’ll go with you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, you big idiot,” you rolled your eyes again. “Can we talk about this later? I’d like to go back to sleep before we have to be at school tomorrow.”

Jeonghan sat cross-legged on your floor and looked up at you with a fake pout. “Aw, you’re kicking me out already?”

“Please leave before Mingyu comes in wanting to investigate.”

“Oh, come on —”

“Out!”

The two of you shared a laugh as he climbed out of your window, and you made sure he didn’t hit his head on something going back down. Once he was safely in your yard, you clambered back onto your bed, exhausted and ready to doze off.

Maybe if you weren’t sleepily staring at your ceiling, you would have noticed your phone light up on the desk just a few feet away.

junnie <3: hey idk if ur awake rn butjunnie <3: can we talk for a moment?

“Y/N, can you hurry the fuck up?”

“I’ve been in here for ten minutes, calm down!” you yell back from in front of the mirror, frantically trying to brush through your tangled hair.

You had, in a moment of weakness, hit the snooze button on your alarm this morning, and then woke up an entire hour later to Mingyu slamming his bedroom door shut. In hindsight, a terrible idea, but you blamed Jeonghan’s midnight visit for how tired you had been.

When you finally opened the bathroom door again, Mingyu was standing right there with your bag in one hand and your phone in the other.

“Here’s your stuff. I’m assuming you already ate, but if not I made breakfast. It’s on the kitchen table.”

“Why are you being so helpful?” you asked suspiciously as you took your stuff from him.

“Can’t I just be nice to my little sister for once?”

You sent him a look. 

“Okay, fine,” he sighed. “You got me. I’m just trying to get you to leave a little faster.”

“There you go.” You gave a small smile when Mingyu ruffled your hair and stepped into the bathroom, door locking behind him. He annoyed you immensely at times, but he was your brother after all. He couldn’t not care for you, and vice versa.

Heading out, you scrolled through your phone to catch up on any notifications you missed. There were a few texts from the group chat with Ryu and Seoyun confirming weekend plans, and others from various classmates and friends asking about homework.

cha eunwoo from calc: hey y/n sorry to bother u but what are all the trig identities again

eunjoo: is mr. kyung crazy a 5 page paper due in two days ??????

kwan: girl send bio hw answers PLS i’m literally begging

junnie: deleted a message

junnie <3: deleted a message

Huh? 

You squinted at your screen. There were no texts from Jun after that, and those were sent at nearly one in the morning. Based on when you fell asleep, probably after Jeonghan had left your room.

That was weird. You’d have to ask him what it was about later — later being a few minutes, considering the daily ritual you had of walking to school together.

Sure, some of you could drive now, and it would be a lot easier, but… somehow, this had just stuck over time.

As predicted, you saw the boys approaching in the distance just several moments later. You waved to them, effectively getting Seungkwan’s attention:

“Y/N, I can’t believe you didn’t answer my texts! I was really struggling!”

“Sorry!” you called back. “If it helps, I didn’t reply to Eunwoo either!”

“I’m your best friend, you can’t compare me with Cha Eunwoo!”

Jeonghan merely snorted and Jun let out a laugh, the one that was loud and high pitched and impossibly contagious. You could never get tired of hearing him laugh.

“I don’t even know how he has that much energy in the morning,” he said when they reached you. “I barely got any sleep last night, so I’m dead exhausted.”

“You must be if you texted me at one o’clock,” you teased lightly, bumping his shoulder. “What did you want to talk about? I saw this morning that you deleted it.”

“Oh,” he said, blinking. “It was nothing. It’s fine.”

You frowned at the uncertain expression on his face. “Are you sure?”

“Uh huh.”

“Jun, you know you can talk to me about anything, right?”

“I know,” he agreed gently, carding a hand through his still damp hair, “but it’s alright. It wasn’t that important, anyways.”

It still somewhat bothered you that he suddenly didn’t want to tell you what he’d sent, but you let it be for the moment. If he said it was fine, then it was fine. You weren’t going to push him.

“Looks like none of us slept very well aside from Seungkwan,” Jeonghan remarked, fiddling with one of his earrings. “I feel like all the energy has been sucked out of my soul, too.”

You raised your eyebrows. “That’s on you for sneaking into my room when you should have been asleep.”

Seungkwan gasped. “He did what?”

“Relax,” Jeonghan snorted. “I wasn’t committing a crime or anything.”

“Trespassing is a crime!”

“Well, they let me in, so I think I’m clear of any charges.”

Seungkwan just looked between the two of you, completely baffled. 

“You two are insane,” he shook his head. “Nothing has changed since we were kids.”

“Thanks.”

Jun spoke up then, his smooth, honey-like voice in your ear. “I think you skipped the most important part,” he said, frowning. “Why was he in your house in the middle of the night?”

“Don’t worry, it wasn’t that big of a deal,” you patted his shoulder to calm him down a little bit, “basically, we —”

“Y/N’s my prom date!”

You heard Jun choke on absolutely nothing, coughing violently behind you, and Seungkwan nearly tripped over his own feet. Luckily, you managed to yank him back in time before he fell into the pavement face first.

“Whoa,” Seungkwan said,  balancing himself again. “Sorry, I was expecting literally anything else but that”

“You look really surprised,” you observed with a laugh. “We’re just going as friends, guys. It’s chill.”

He immediately turned to Jeonghan. “You had to sneak into their room in the dead of night to ask them to prom as friends?”

Jeonghan winced. “Okay, when you put it that way…”

“See?”

“Guys, it’s fine,” you repeated. “I didn’t have a date, anyways, so I guess this worked out for the best.”

Seungkwan nodded finally. “Well, I didn’t see that coming, but good for you two! When I finally convince Jun to go with his best buddy, Jeonghan is gonna owe me ten bucks, so I’m just waiting on that.”

The two boys started bickering again and you realized Jun had gone completely silent behind you. He walked with the group quietly, staring at the ground and occasionally kicking along the loose rocks in the sidewalk.

You fell back a little, matching his pace. “Are you okay?”

“Huh?” His head snapped up and he looked at you, hair falling haphazardly over his forehead. “Yeah, I’m alright.”

“Okay,” you smiled softly. “You’ve been pretty quiet today. Usually you’re up there arguing with those two about something or the other. Or me.”

The corners of his mouth lifted ever so slightly, but it was a little sad, just a little wistful. You missed it entirely, glancing off to the side instead of the momentary crestfallen look on his face.

“Well, you know I didn’t sleep that well,” he answered, “so… that’s probably what it is.”

You simply nodded, taking him for his word. Pushing him wouldn’t get you anywhere, and the last thing you wanted was to make him feel uncomfortable.

Jun never brought it up either. Regardless of how urgent it may have seemed to be the night he texted you, the subject was never heard of again.

Everything else seemed to be going great. College acceptances began to roll in. Your course load started letting up, finally, with the impending arrival of graduation. And — you couldn’t discount the small victories in life — you’d managed to find the perfect prom dress while out shopping with Ryu and Seoyun.

You loved how you looked. The sudden rush of confidence had never been better — you felt so pretty in the soft yellow fabric, thin straps resting snugly against your shoulders. It was simple, but more than enough, and you absolutely adored it.

On the contrary, Jeonghan seemed to have a few qualms about it.

“Yellow?” he asked when you told him the next day. “Like bright yellow?”

“Not super bright, but just… it’s yellow, Han, I don’t know how else to explain this. Is there a problem?”

“Nope,” he grinned, tugging on his ear cuff, “but a yellow tie might mess with my look. You know I have a certain image to uphold.” 

You sent him an exasperated glare.

“I’m just kidding!”

“Yoon Jeonghan, be serious, I’m literally begging right now.”

The days leading up to your prom passed quickly and without much occasion. In fact, all of the chaos was only happening inside your head. You couldn’t deny that you desperately wanted to know who Jun was going with, but you didn’t want to bother him about it and be weird. The two of you didn’t speak much either, only a few words here and there and all of your texts left unread.

After all, you were only his best friend. What was the use of spending so much time wondering who he was taking to prom when you knew it was never going to be you? It was absolutely pointless to keep wondering and imagining. You were starting to think Seungkwan was right about you being delusional.

And yet, you just couldn’t let go.

“Oh, Yoon Jeonghan, you never disappoint.”

“Anything for the lady,” he said graciously, but his eye roll gave it away. (He could only pretend to be annoyed with you, and you knew that.) “If Taehyung questions this at all, I’m going home and dyeing this tie black immediately.”

“You will do no such thing!”

“Yeah? Try me.”

Jun only laughed from his spot behind Jeonghan, the one that lit up his entire face, the one you loved, and you would have been able to enjoy it a little better if not for the brown-haired girl hanging off his arm who was desperately talking his ear off.

You grabbed Seungkwan’s sleeve and pulled him a little closer to you. “Do you know who that is?”

“I honestly don’t know,” he admitted after a few seconds. “Literally never seen her around school, but it doesn’t matter because now I owe Jeonghan five bucks either way.”

“Your fault for making a dumb bet,” you shot back.

“What? Who’s betting?” You gasped, not expecting Jun to butt into the conversation, and nearly tripped over your own dress. “Why do you look so terrified?”

“Stop sneaking up on me like that,” you grumbled, smoothing down your hair as he steadied you with one hand. “I’m going to have a heart attack if you three keep this up.”

“You’re going to be fine.”

“Shut up, Seungkwan.”

Banter was not uncommon between you, but the back and forth was suddenly awkward in the presence of a newcomer in your group. It didn’t look like Ryu and Seoyun knew her either, since neither had spoken to the girl at all, so you were truly wondering where Jun knew her from.

Another thing he never told you. You didn’t know how to feel about that, because there were no secrets between you and him. Jun would tell you anything and everything, so this was oddly new.

“Oh. Guys, this is Heejin —”

“Heather,” she interrupted with a loud laugh, fingers twisting the hem of her purple dress. “I don’t go by my legal name anymore.”

“She’s from New York,” Jun continued, a little disgruntled. “A family friend of mine. She happened to be here for vacation, so I brought her here.”

Everyone went around introducing themselves and saying their hellos, but you couldn’t help but dislike her even more the longer she spent with you. You were starting to feel the way you did in middle school again, burning indignantly under Yeona’s arrogant smile.

Jeonghan didn’t seem to notice, too preoccupied with having a good time. And that was fine — great, because you weren’t ready for a confrontation with him, and you were sure he was going to interrogate you if he ever doubted your feelings for Jun. 

“Hey,” Seungkwan found you at the edge of the dance floor, looking a little concerned. “Feeling okay?”

“Yeah? Why?”

“I think you forget how well I know you sometimes,” he sighed, straightening out his tie. “Do you really think I don’t know what’s going on in your head right now?”

“I’d rather you didn’t. It’s pretty embarrassing.”

“It isn’t,” he insisted sincerely. “But clearly it’s just putting you in a worse mood. I was all the way over there, and one look at your face told me something was up.”

“Maybe you’re just paranoid,” you tried deflecting.

“No,” Seungkwan said, smiling gently, “I’m your best friend.”

You let him walk you to the small balcony, claiming you would be fine after a little bit of fresh air, and he didn’t question or push you any further after that, leaving you to yourself quietly. The wind stung your bare arms, but you found that you didn’t mind it all that much. After all, you’d experienced a more searing kind of pain lately while grappling with your feelings for a certain someone. In the face of that, this was basically nothing.

“Y/N?” Speak of the devil. “What are you doing out here?”

You brought your arms around yourself a little tighter as Jun approached you, leaning against the railing. 

“What are you doing here?” you asked in turn. “Shouldn’t you be dancing with Heather and keeping her company?”

“Maybe I should,” Jun shrugged. His hair was all tousled now because of the wind, but he still looked handsome as ever. “But she seems like she’ll be fine on her own. It’s you that I was looking for.”

It was gradually getting colder, and you shifted closer to him in search of some body heat. Jun had always been the epitome of warmth, radiating it like the sun itself, and so you felt infinitely better standing by his side in the night breeze.

Neither of you spoke for a while, and it could have been nice, but you knew that the silence was heavy. So many unanswered questions about the future that you hadn’t addressed were laying there, on top of the slight tension the two of you had experienced over the past week. 

What came next? None of you had brought up college yet, and even though the deadline to make a choice wasn’t quite over, you knew all of your friends had to have an idea of where they were going. And what would become of you then? Your precious group, all those memories you’ve collected for years… 

Jun let out a deep sigh from beside you. “I just want to make it clear,” he started softly, “that I haven’t been avoiding you. Or Seungkwan, or Jeonghan. Not on purpose. And I know I haven’t texted any of you guys back in forever, but —”

“Junnie, it’s okay —”

“It’s not okay,” he said, more forcefully. “You guys didn’t do anything, but I’ve been making you second guess it for like, a week now. I feel terrible about it.”

You placed a hand on his arm to try and comfort him. “That’s not true, Jun.”

“You don’t have to tell me these things for me to know, Y/N. I’ve been your friend for years,” he answered, and you knew he was right. 

“Jun, it’s okay,” you repeated. “You don’t have to explain yourself. We don’t blame you for anything.”

He only lowered his head, eyes shut, like he was absorbing your words, juggling them around in his mind. Every second that passed in silence made your heart beat faster. Had you said something wrong again?

“Lots of things were going on. It was just hard,” he admitted. You hated seeing him like this, anxious and troubled. You rarely saw this side of him, anyway — he was always very good at concealing his negative thoughts, but at times like this he felt comfortable enough to open up to you. “Just — my brother was sick, and then school stuff, and then, you…”

You held your breath, waiting for him to finish that sentence. There were a thousand possible things he could have said, for a thousand different reasons, but you wanted to hear the one in his mind at the moment. 

“I?”

You would replay this moment for the rest of your life. For years from now, you would be recreating the way Jun looked at you for those few seconds. Not quite fondly, but more like he was in awe as his eyes were trained on you. Like he was left speechless, like you were something unreal. You weren’t sure what the look in his eyes meant, and you wouldn’t know until he said something, anything.

“... Never mind.”

Crash, went your heart, shattering into infinite pieces on the balcony floor, the frozen moment cracked, just like that. You could say nothing, couldn’t give yourself away, so you only plastered a small smile on your face, hoping he’d understand. (He wouldn’t. How could he?)

All you could do was watch him as he went on with his apology, all shiny eyed and simply gorgeous under the dim lighting, trying to ignore how you felt like you could barely breathe anymore.

“... I’m so sorry.” Jun paused when he was done to look up at you again, and he seemed startled at your expression. “Y/N? Are you okay?”

You hadn’t realized you had tears welling up in your eyes, but you could feel them threatening to spill now. Silently you willed them not to fall, blinking quickly to get rid of them.

“Yeah,” you managed. “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure? Do you need me to do anything for you?”

“Go inside,” you told him, maybe a little harsher than he deserved. He didn’t know, after all. He had no idea. 

“Y/N —” 

“I just wanna be alone for a while,” your voice came out in a shaky whisper. You hated how vulnerable you felt and sounded, and as much as you hoped Jun wouldn’t pick up on it, you knew he would. 

And you knew Jun. You were well aware that he was the kind of person who wouldn’t believe you whenever you said you were fine, because he saw right through your lie every time. He was a rather persistent kind of friend, trying time and again in small ways to do anything, everything, for you.

But he just nodded now, head lowered, and slowly walked away from your trembling figure. You couldn’t know why — maybe he sensed you truly wanted some space, or maybe he was just sick and tired of you not knowing what you wanted or how to deal with yourself. You would be, if you were him.

It was only after the door slid shut behind him and his footsteps faded away into the liveliness of the night that you let your tears freely fall.

You hadn’t contacted Seungkwan in a while. To be exact, it had been nearly a day since you last interacted with him. Some would call you dramatic, but you didn’t care. 

To you, it felt like an eternity. You couldn’t call him now — he was probably busy — but you were looking at an old picture in your camera roll, a shot taken of the four of you sitting side by side on one of the benches at your high school. It made you feel nostalgic, a little bittersweet, and you wished you knew about his plan to go to college abroad a little earlier. You would have felt like you had more time with him.

A loud knock at your bedroom door startled you suddenly, and you dropped your phone on the floor with a yelp.

“Y/N!”

“Yeah?”

Jun pushed the door open slowly as you checked your phone screen for any cracks. “Are you ready to go yet? Our stuff’s all loaded, we’re just waiting on you.”

Oh, right. You stared around at your room, your belongings all packed in cardboard boxes that were now stacked on top of each other in the trunk of your parents’ car, leaving your walls and shelves nearly bare.

Seungkwan might be halfway across the world right now, but your friends were all attending the same university not too far from where you lived, and you were moving in today, leaving behind the street and homes you’d known for most of your lives.

You didn’t feel ready, and maybe you never would be, but you knew that you couldn’t possibly delay this moment any longer.

“Jeonghan’s driving, by the way,” Jun told you as you followed him down your staircase. He waved hello to your parents as they were tidying up in the living room, and you couldn’t help the way your chest tightened at the small gesture. “I didn’t have much of a choice. He got my keys and was in my car before I was even out of the house.”

“Jeonghan? Really?” 

“I’m dead serious,” he said, opening your front door. “Look.”

There he was, Yoon Jeonghan in all his glory, leaning back in the driver’s seat with his feet propped up on the dashboard. As far as you could recall, he had not driven once since first getting his license (on the fourth attempt), so you weren’t sure if you were going to survive this hour-long car ride.

“Don’t you want shotgun?” you asked as you approached the car. Jun had already headed for the backseat but stopped short at your question.

“Nah,” he shook his head. His hair looked so fluffy, and it made him seem more adorable than usual. “It’s better if you sit in the front with your motion sickness. Don’t want you throwing up on move-in day, do we?”

You hadn’t expected him to remember that. In fact, you didn’t really remember mentioning it to him, so the fact that he knew had you a little bit stumped. (And slightly flustered, if you were going to be completely honest.)

“Oh, you’re here,” Jeonghan greeted you with a devious smile when you were buckled in, lowering his sunglasses dramatically. “I’ve been waiting for like, thirty minutes. What took you so long?”

“Feet off my dash, please,” Jun reminded him from the backseat. With a groan, Jeonghan returned to a normal sitting position, finally starting the car.

“You’re no fun,” he grumbled, making you and Jun chuckle, and pulled out of your driveway. “Have our parents left yet?”

“I think they’re gonna get going in a few minutes.”

“Great. We’ve got a head start.” Jeonghan winked at the rearview mirror, and Jun made a gagging noise from the back. Their antics made you laugh, as always — some things would never change, and your dynamic seemed to be part of that category.

After a harrowing seventy-six minutes, several close calls on the highway, and a lot of swearing from Jeonghan, you finally pulled into the parking lot in front of the university residence halls. Jun had somehow fallen asleep amidst all the chaos, so you shook him awake gently.

“Hey,” you whispered, brushing his hair off his forehead. “We’re here. You gotta get up and unpack.”

“Hmm?” Oh, the sight of him looking up at you with sleepy eyes and half messed up hair made you feel a certain way, had you in a death grip. 

“Let’s go, or Jeonghan is going to lock you inside your own car. You know he can and will do it.”

Jun nodded his agreement and followed you further into the campus. Your parents wouldn’t be here for quite a while, Jeonghan was telling you, so you decided to scope out where your dorms were for the time being.

You were conveniently located on the ground floor, but Jun was on the fourth floor in the same hall that had no elevators, and Jeonghan was in the next hall over. The three of you decided to camp out in your room, so you unlocked the door and propped it open, letting them file in.

“Your roommate’s not here yet,” Jeonghan observed, taking in the blank walls. “So I guess you get first pick, then.”

“For what? Both sides are identical.”

“I don’t know, don’t you want to establish a power dynamic early on?”

“No?” You sent him a funny look. “You’re a menace through and through, Yoon Jeonghan.”

“Thanks. I’ve been practicing.”

While you were busy thinking of something to say in response to that, you heard someone walk in through the door you left open. Maybe it was your roommate, you turned around expectantly, but you froze at the sight of a tall, handsome man in your room. He looked rather frazzled, you noticed, as if he’d just been running through the hall.

“Hey, have any of you seen another dude ‘round here, around this tall and carrying a blue leather notebook with a Cinnamoroll sticker on it?” he asked, the words rushed out of his mouth.

All three of you just stared at him blankly.

“Is he your roommate?”

“That was oddly specific.”

“You like Cinnamoroll?”

Immediately, you pinched Jeonghan’s side for the last comment and smiled warmly at the newcomer as your friend let out a pained yelp. 

“Sorry, we haven’t seen your guy,” you told him apologetically. “Was the notebook important?”

“Well, kind of. It’s my recipe book that I’ve been keeping for a while,” the mystery man explained, sighing. 

“Oh,” you said at this information. “Do you want us to help you find it?”

“Eh, it’s alright. He just likes messing around with me every now and then, he’ll return it soon,” he shrugged, smiling sheepishly. “I’m Mingyu, by the way.”

You went around doing your introductions, and by the time you had him sitting on the floor in a circle with the rest of your friends, you found that you liked Mingyu very much. What was not to like? He was good-looking, smart, and funny — not to mention he was an exceptional cook as well. The last time you were in a kitchen with your friends, they’d managed to burn the ramen and set off your fire alarm. This was a welcome change, and a distraction from Jun that you were very grateful for.

“Wonwoo’s finally done pulling my leg,” Mingyu said after a while, reading his texts with a chuckle. “I guess I’ll get going now. I’ve still got some stuff to put away.”

You walked Mingyu out into the hallway while your friends looked on, one in amusement, and one in an unexplained bitterness he couldn’t quite place.

“It was nice meeting you,” you said, fiddling with the hem of your T-shirt. “You should come around more often. I can tell Jun and Jeonghan really liked getting to know you. Maybe you can bring your roommate over, too.”

“I hope you don’t mind if I take you up on that offer,” Mingyu replied, flashing you a charming smile so wide you caught a glimpse of his sharp canines. “Can I get your number? I-I mean, to contact you, you know… just that —”

You chuckled softly at how nervous he seemed to be and readily swapped phones so you could exchange your numbers. 

Mingyu handed yours back with a contented grin.“See you around, Y/N.”

“See you.” 

When he was finally gone, you spun around to face your friends, waiting for them to say something. Jeonghan was staring at you with his jaw dropped, and Jun had his arms crossed with an expression that reminded you of a grumpy cat.

“Man, how are you pulling within thirty minutes of pulling up to your dorm?”

“Shut up, Han.” You settled back down in your seat and looked straight at Jun. Unflinchingly, he gazed right back at you. His brows were furrowed and he seemed slightly put off, but you still thought he was one of the most beautiful people you’d ever laid your eyes on. 

You cleared your throat with a cough. “Why do you look so upset, Junnie?”

“I’m not upset, I’m just worried for you,” he defended, a small pout on his face. “You don’t know anything about Mingyu! He could just be a really shitty guy who works out for the clout and pretends to be a good cook so he can get phone numbers from pretty girls like you!”

Everything that was in your brain automatically wiped itself when you heard the last part of his sentence, but you quickly hid how flustered you were behind a pointed smirk.

“You think I’m pretty?”

Jun rolled his eyes and flicked your forehead. “That’s not the point, dummy.”

“Ow, what the fuck?”

Jeonghan always had a good time watching the two of you bicker, but now, leaning against the wall, he wondered exactly how long the two of you were going to dance around each other and do nothing about it. Months? Years? When were you both going to just wake up? 

Honestly, he was starting to second guess what he thought he knew about both of your feelings.

“Okay, I’m gonna head out for a moment,” he announced when the two of you quieted down a little. “Mom just texted, said they’re gonna be here soon. I’ll just let them know where we are.”

You and Jun nodded, in sync, at the well-told lie. Jeonghan made sure to slip away quietly, leaving you to quarrel in peace and saving himself from the awkwardness of being an unverified third wheel until your parents really did show up.

Before he left the room, he looked back for a quick second. He saw clearly the way you looked at Jun, understood perfectly what was in your heart even though you had never told him. He only hoped he was right that Jun felt the same.

To your utter and complete dismay, it didn’t take all that long for your seemingly perfect group to fall apart.

You rarely saw Jeonghan after the first few weeks, if at all. Every time you scanned a crowd or street for that familiar black jacket and silver earring, you were left disappointed, and every time you called it was left unanswered. It was like he chose to vanish from your day to day life, and you didn’t know why.

It was a little better with Jun: you still saw each other when you could, and texted often, but it was still hard. After your first semester was over, it was more difficult to align your schedules. He was an engineering major, and you were in graphic design — you didn’t have any classes together as time went by, and most of the things you did outside of class to further your careers were entirely different as well.

The very first time you visited home after moving in, it was three of you in Jun’s beat up car. The second time you went back, it was only you and Jun.

By the time your second year rolled around, it was just you on the short train ride to the station closest to your street.

You wanted to tell Seungkwan every time he called and you talked for hours, confide in him about your worries. Look, you wanted to say, look what’s become of us. You’re in Boston, Jeonghan basically disappeared, and I barely ever see Jun even though we’re both on campus all the time. 

But you couldn’t. Seungkwan always sounded so happy, so cheerful, that whenever you heard that telltale ‘what about you?’, it was impossible to actually tell the truth.

So you didn’t.

The one thing that seemed to be going well for you was your relationship with Mingyu. You met him several more times after move-in that day, and when you found out you shared quite a lot of courses with him, an animation major, falling into an easy friendship with him just felt like the right thing to do.

You’d befriended his roommate in the process, too — Wonwoo was secretly unhinged and wore a quiet facade, and he quickly became very good friends with Jun, who seemed to enjoy the former’s company a lot. They were both in engineering, after all, so you figured they would have found each other someday if not through you and Mingyu.

Things were alright. But they could be a little better, you thought whenever you scrolled through old pictures on your phone, or stared a little too long at the photo of the group you always kept in your wallet.

“Aw, that’s cute.”

You snapped your head up so fast you thought you might break your neck. “Mingyu!”

“Hi,” he laughed at your surprised reaction, sliding into the empty seat in front of you. “Where’s that picture from?”

“Oh, this?” You smoothed a finger over the top of the Polaroid fondly. “It’s from our first day of high school. I’ve got one from graduation in my phone, too,” you flipped it to show him, “so it all goes full circle, kinda.”

“Can I see?”

Gingerly, he took your phone and the Polaroid as you handed it to him, and examined it intently. You watched as he smiled softly at the sight of your adolescent selves, happy and free of the troubles of growing up.

“Who’s that?”

“Who?” You scooted closer so you could see. “Oh, Seungkwan,” you chuckled. “He’s gone abroad for college, living it up in Boston now.”

“You miss him, don’t you?”

You hugged your knees to your chest and tried to ignore the hollow feeling in your chest. “Yeah,” you admitted. “He’s one of my best friends, and we still keep in touch and stuff, but…”

“It’s not the same?”

“Exactly.”

“Man, Jeonghan looks like a whole different person with short hair,” he remarked, moving on to the picture on your phone. You were grateful for the diversion, and you happily poked fun at Jeonghan’s drastic change in style with your new friend while he pulled up old photos of him and Wonwoo to show you in exchange.

It was nice, to talk about the old times. You missed the simplicity of high school, and how close you all were — it was always just a two-minute walk over to Jeonghan’s front door. Now it was thirty-two missed calls, and no response.

“Hey, my design class is in ten minutes, so as much as I loved bonding over embarrassing high school memories, I do have to go,” Mingyu said after nearly an hour of reminiscing over your childhoods. “You don’t have anything else tonight, right? Should we meet in the dining hall at nine?”

“Nine should be good,” you agreed, checking your phone. “I’ll see you at dinner, Gyu.”

“Bye!”

You sighed when he left, finally focused enough to get back into the groove of doing all the work you’d been procrastinating on all day. Unwisely, you had chosen to take a three hour nap in the middle of the day, which meant all your work was getting pushed to tonight.

You opened up a file and were just about to type the first word when your phone started buzzing.

“So much for productivity,” you grumbled to yourself, flipping it over, and your breath caught in your throat when you checked the caller ID. It was always you texting, calling, to try and coordinate plans. How long had it been since he contacted you first? 

“Jun?”

“Hi,” came his breathless voice. “Um, are you at your dorm right now?”

You raised an eyebrow. “Jun, have you been running?”

“No,” he said, but you always knew when he was lying and the inflection in his voice didn’t help his case at all. “I’m, uh, I just got out of class and I don’t really have much else to do tonight, and — do you want to eat together?”

“Huh?” You almost dropped your phone. “Aren’t you busy?”

“Y/N, I wouldn’t be asking if I was.” He paused, and all you could hear was the wind on his end of the line. “I just… wanted to see you. I know it’s been a while since we’ve properly spent time together.”

You weren’t sure how to feel. On one hand, you were slightly hurt that he hadn’t reached out to you earlier, couldn’t make time for you just once — but he was doing it now, and that had to count for something, didn’t it?

Then again, this was Jun. You always had it in you to forgive him, because no matter how upset you were, you couldn’t help the fact that you loved him, plain as day. 

“Alright,” you said finally. “Text me where and when, okay?”

“You got it.”

With that, you ended the call, and shot Mingyu a quick sorry, something came up text. He wouldn’t read it until after he was out of his class, but you stared at it long after it went through, trying to process all of your messy feelings about Jun. 

How had it come this far? Why had you let it get this bad in the first place?

Fifteen minutes passed until you realized you had gotten no work done and were still lost in your thoughts about your best friend. With a frustrated groan, you hid your face in your hands, frustrated to the verge of pulling all of your hair out.

So much for productivity.

You hadn’t realized a person could change so much over the course of a month or two. Sure, it’d been a while since you’d seen Jun, really seen him, but you weren’t expecting for it to hit you this hard.

For one, he’d dyed his hair so that now there were brown streaks in it, and you couldn’t deny that it was an extremely good look on him. Not only that, he seemed more serious, more mature, like he’d finally grown into himself and was confident about who he was.

“You keep eyeing your phone,” he remarked now over a plate of cold noodles. “Did you ditch a date to be here or something?”

You winced, tucking your phone further under your bag. Close. “Not exactly, but I did have to reschedule with Mingyu, so...”

“Mingyu?” A weird expression came across Jun’s face, one you couldn’t comprehend. “Huh. I didn’t know you were into guys like him.”

“What? Jun, I’m not attracted to him or anything, if that’s what you’ve been thinking for the two years he’s been our friend,” you dismissed the idea. How could it be true, when you only had eyes for Jun?

And you’d tried, really. You tried so hard, but Mingyu had always remained a friend, and Jun had remained in your heart, rooted to the ground so deep you could never cut him away and replace him with somebody else.

“Well, I don’t know,” Jun shrugged, eyes trained on his food. “He’s tall, good-looking, smart, makes amazing kimchi jjigae…”

“We’re just friends, Junnie,” you said softly. “That’s all Mingyu’s ever been to me. So don’t worry, okay?”

“I’m not worrying, I’m just saying that he’s a nice guy.” You had no idea where all this was coming from, but it sort of stung for some reason. “And you deserve that, you know. A good person.”

All too soon, you felt your cheeks heat up, and suddenly you were looking everywhere but right in front of you. 

“I — thanks,” you said, “but really, Jun, you don’t have to concern yourself about this. At all. Like, I haven’t dated anyone, and I don’t think I will anytime soon, so…”

“Why not?”

You froze at this, not really knowing how to respond. How were you supposed to react? There were multiple things you could say but none of them were appropriate for the relationship you currently had with Jun.

I’ve been in love with you since we were in eighth grade. You’re the only one who’s always on my mind. I don’t want to go on a date if it’s not with you.

“Never got around to it,” you ended up saying nonchalantly. If your act was good enough, Jun would probably buy it. “What about you?” 

You regretted the question as soon as it left your mouth, and you internally berated yourself for blurting it out the moment it popped into your head. Jun, however, took the question and ran with it.

“Me?” he chuckled softly, setting his chopsticks down and looking back at you. He was silent for so long you’d started to think you’d touched on something he didn’t particularly want to share, but then you met his gaze again and it took you back.

All of a sudden, it was the night of senior prom again, you out on the balcony and Jun standing beside you with the wind in your hair and a multitude of words on the tip of his tongue that you wouldn’t get to hear.

“Never got around to it.”

Again, you masked your disappointment behind a mildly amused smile.

“Foul,” you said with a shake of your head. “Can’t believe my best friend of almost ten years is keeping secrets from me.”

“I’m telling you the truth!” Jun exclaimed, laughing at your expression. “Seriously, Y/N! If I ever get a girlfriend, I’m telling you first. Okay? I promise.”

You weren’t sure how you would react if you ever did hear that news, but for now you just nodded and let the conversation move on to a less personal topic. Jun deserved love too, the pure, sweet kind, and you didn’t know if you could give him that. Maybe what you felt for him wasn’t enough.

“I’m glad we did this,” Jun told you once you finished your meal and were walking out of the dining hall together. It was a lovely evening, cool and breezy, and with his fluffy hair and gentle smile you could almost convince yourself that he was yours, for the moment. “We should do it more often, Y/N. I missed hanging out with you.”

It was like he could read your mind. “I missed you, too.”

You watched him walk away after you hugged him and promised to meet soon with an odd, heavy feeling in your chest, like it was tightly squeezing against your heart and you couldn’t breathe anymore. Jun walked away with your heart in his hands once again, and you could only hope that he would handle it carefully, after all these years —

“Shit, where did I put it,” you muttered as you scrambled to find your ringing phone. Finally locating it in your bag, you pulled it out and had to stare at your screen for a few seconds to figure out whether or not you were hallucinating.

At last, you decided to pick up. “Hello?”

“Hi, is this Y/N?”

That was most definitely not Jeonghan’s voice, you realized, frowning. “Yes? Where is Jeonghan?”

“Um,” the man on the other line paused for a moment, “he’s right here, but I think he’s had a little too much alcohol already and he probably shouldn’t stay any longer. You were the first number in his emergency contact list, so I thought I’d call.”

“Okay,” you let out a relieved sigh you didn’t know you had in you. “Okay. What’s your name?”

“Jihoon.”

“Alright, Jihoon, just… send me your location and hold on to him for a bit, okay? I’ll be there as quickly as I can.”

“Sure thing.”

The notification arrived as soon as you hung up on Jihoon. On the verge of panicking, you entered the address into your GPS and set off in the direction of your destination before you realized you hadn’t brought your car to campus and stopped right in your tracks.

It was only fifteen minutes away by foot. Technically, you could walk… but you didn’t know if you really wanted to head through the residential part of town alone this late at night.

Do I really have to do this right now? 

You debated on it for a while, and then pulled out your phone again.

you: hey

junnie: hii

you: i know its a bit late but can u do me a quick favor pls

junnie: sure whats up!

you: u have ur car right? can u come with me to pick jeonghan up?

junnie: yes i’ll be there asap

junnie: wait what????

you: i’ll explain later i promise

junnie: where are u

you: still by the dining hall!

junnie: ok on my way

It was getting colder the longer you waited outside, and you were on the brink of deciding to go wait in the lounge when that familiar black car pulled up in front of the parking lot. You didn’t need a text to come through to know it was Jun, and you all but ran to the passenger side. 

“So,” he started, eyes on the road as he drove, “what’s going on?”

“Um…” You stared at your hands clasped together in your lap. “I got a call from Jeonghan. Well, it was his friend, but he’s incredibly drunk right now and…”

“Oh.” Jun glanced at the time out of the corner of his eye. “Already? It’s just a quarter past ten.”

“That’s Jeonghan for you, I guess,” you snorted, shivering slightly as your bare skin tingled from the chill. Jun let his eyes shift to you briefly, taking in your frigid state.

“Are you cold?”

“Kinda,” you said, “but it’s fine.”

Jun shook his head, taking a hand off the wheel. “I brought a spare hoodie,” he informed you, gesturing towards the backseat. “Should be over there, if you can reach it, or I can pull over for a second.”

“No, keep driving.” You easily grabbed the hoodie lying on the backseat, and you recognized it as one of his favorites, the beige one with a koi fish pattern on the front. Your stomach felt like it was flipped upside down, and you didn’t know how to comprehend it, so you just pulled it over your shirt in silence.

Every time you thought you were done, Jun would do something like this. He would care for you, show you how much you meant to him, and then you were done for all over again. It was a vicious cycle.

“This is the place, right?”

You shifted your gaze away from him and to the GPS open on your phone. “Yeah,” you said, unbuckling your seatbelt. “I’ll just go in and grab him. Be right back.”

“Wait, I’ll come with you!”

“It’s fine —”

Jun leaned back in his seat and frowned at you. “They’re likely all drunk out of their minds, Y/N. I just want to make sure you’re safe.”

“I’m nearly twenty, I can handle it,” you assured him. You would never actually admit that the real reason you wanted to go alone was that he made your head spin so intensely, you just needed a few moments to breathe. 

“Are you sure?”

“Junnie, I’ll be okay,” you smiled. “I’ll be back with Jeonghan, okay?”

He rolled his eyes, almost comically, and folded his arms over his chest — you had forgotten how dramatic he could be at times, and you chuckled silently at the sight of this side of him again. 

“Alright,” he mumbled. “Text me if you need me, okay?”

You promised him you would with a firm nod and headed towards the house. You could hear the loud music even from where you were and inwardly sighed as you knocked on the door.

No response. You knocked again, much harsher this time, and then it finally opened to a very confused-looking guy with bright blue hair.

“Almost didn’t hear ya,” he remarked, eyeing your attire suspiciously. “Y’need something, or?”

“Um,” you didn’t know how to navigate this situation. “I’m here to pick someone up… Do you know where I can find Jihoon?”

The guy perked up almost instantly at the supposedly familiar name. “Jihoon? ‘Course. C’mon, follow me,” he said, propping the door open wider so that you could step inside.

The first thing that hit you was the overwhelming bass in your ear, and the second was the strong smell of alcohol and sweat that you had never experienced before. You wrinkled your nose as you tried not to lose the blue-haired guy in front of you.

“I’m Yeonjun, by the way,” he told you, and you couldn’t really tell whether he was drunk or not. You could barely even hear him over the music. 

“Cool,” you managed to respond. “I’m Y/N.”

“Well, Y/N, there’s your guy,” Yeonjun stopped walking and nodded over to a more secluded corner. You immediately spotted Jeonghan, sitting on a stool with his head in his hands and accompanied by a much more sober-looking person. “Not sure whatcha need him for, but good luck.”

“What do you mean?”

“See ya!” he called over his shoulder, and he was gone before you could question him further. But you didn’t really care, not when Jeonghan was right there just a few feet away from you.

The man beside him raised his head as you approached them, eyes narrowing before his expression relaxed in recognition. “Y/N?”

“That would be me,” you sighed. “Jihoon, right?”

“In the flesh.”

You glanced down at your friend, still silent and hunched over. “Uh, is he doing alright?”

“He can barely walk, but otherwise he’ll be okay. I got him to drink some water, if that helps.”

“Yes. Amazing, thank you,” you told Jihoon, gently shaking Jeonghan’s shoulders. He just groaned and shifted his head to the side, shoulder-length black hair falling into his face. It would be a silly sight if the context was any different.

“How are you so wasted at ten o’clock on a Wednesday,” you muttered, trying to get him to open his eyes. “Han, we gotta go, okay? I’ll help you get to the car, but you have to work with me here.”

“Nooo,” he groaned again, almost faceplanting onto the granite counter. “Don’t wanna go.”

You pursed your lips. “Yoon Jeonghan, if you cooperate with me right now I swear on my life I will buy you any Lego set you want. With my own savings. Please.”

That seemed to get his attention — you were very aware of Jihoon watching you with amusement the whole time — and he blinked slowly as he sat up on the stool.

“Eh… Junnie?”

That damn sweatshirt. “It’s me, Han, Y/N.”

“Oh!” He laughed then, loudly, and his breath smelled strongly of the alcohol he’d been drinking. “Y/N’s buying me Legos.”

“They are, but only if you make this easy for them,” you said under your breath, helping him stand and looping his arm around your shoulder. “Thanks for keeping an eye on him, Jihoon.”

“No problem,” he replied, still watching the both of you. “You want help bringing him out to the car?”

“Actually, yes,” you admitted, struggling to support both yourself and Jeonghan’s weight. “That would be great.”

After a lot of struggling and many, many swears from Jihoon, you finally managed to get Jeonghan to the car, propping open the door so you could get him into the backseat. Jun was already out of his seat by the time you left the house, and he buckled Jeonghan’s seatbelt carefully so you could catch a break.

“Is he alright?” he asked you quietly once Jihoon had gone back inside.

“He’ll be fine. Do you know where he lives?”

“Not on campus, probably, but I could probably get in touch with his roommate. Hold on.”

You sat beside Jeonghan as Jun typed away furiously on his phone, keeping an eye on your drunk friend as you burrowed yourself further into Jun’s hoodie, if that was even still possible. It was cold out, and the dread you felt creeping up on you wasn’t helping at all.

“Bingo!” Jun turned around in his seat and held his phone out to you. “Got an address. Just a few minutes away.”

You squinted at the screen, skipping the texts and reading the contact name instead. “Joshua Hong?”

“Roommate,” Jun explained, starting the car again. “Do you wanna come sit up front? Your motion sickness is generally way worse when you’re in the backseat.”

He knew you so well, and you hated how it made you fall just a little bit more in love with him each time.

“It’s fine,” you said, those other thoughts dying on your tongue. “It’s not that long of a drive, anyway, and someone’s gotta keep an eye on this one.”

“Okay, but move up after we drop him off, alright?”

The short drive to the apartment was pretty silent, save for Jeonghan’s occasional drunk babbling — you had no idea what he was saying, but you figured once he got some water into his system, as well as some sleep, he would be good as new.

It wasn’t long before Jun was parked in front of a four-story building and the two of you were supporting your friend up one flight of stairs. You hadn’t realized exactly how unstable Jeonghan was until now; he could barely walk up the stairs without nearly tripping over nothing at all.

“Finally,” Jun remarked, pushing open the door to the second floor with a grunt. “Can’t believe the elevator was broken. We have great timing.”

You just nodded along as Jun counted the apartment numbers down the hallway. 

“207, 209, 211… Here! 213.” 

It didn’t take more than one knock for the door to swing open to a tall, blond-haired, very concerned looking man.

“Oh, come in — here,” he said, propping the door open and helping you bring Jeonghan to the couch. “I did tell him to stay home tonight, but he never does listen, does he?”

“That’s Jeonghan for you,” Jun replied, the look on his face a strange mixture of fondness and pain. “He had some water, so I think he should be fine after some sleep.”

“His hangover’s gonna be so bad,” his roommate chuckled, turning to face you both with a gentle smile. “I’m Joshua, from the biological sciences department. You guys must be Junhui and Y/N, right?”

The two of them spoke for a few minutes, and you let them bond while you sat on the couch beside Jeonghan’s sleeping figure. Carefully, you brushed a few strands of stray hair away from his face and mourned the loss of time you could have spent with him, like you did when you were children.

You couldn’t believe how distant he had become over the past two years, like you and Jun were strangers. Radio silence, and then a call from Jihoon to come pick him up. And that was it? Could you ever really go back?

Mid-conversation, you caught Jun’s steady gaze. Do you want to leave? his eyes said.

You looked back at him with all the love in the world that he would never notice. Yes.

The drive back was mostly silent — not the awkward kind, but the easy quiet that you had always had with him. It was always during moments like these when you thought that you and Jun would be good together, in another universe where things were a little different. The two of you had just clicked in a way you never really did with anyone else. The idea that it would likely never be anything more than that made your heart ache, sitting there on the passenger side of your best friend’s car.

Jun pulled up to your dorm sooner than you would have liked. A few more minutes, you had thought, but even that wouldn’t have been quite enough.

“Get some sleep,” he said gently as you stepped onto the sidewalk. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

You knew as well as he did that that was a lie disguised as a trite platitude. You weren’t going to see him tomorrow, or the day after. Maybe in a few weeks, if you were lucky, or a month. 

“See you,” you told him anyway. “And thank you for driving me, Jun.”

“Always, Y/N,” he smiled. “Anytime.”

That was a lie, too, even though you knew he wouldn’t ever intend it as such. Over the past year, you had gotten used to Jun’s earnest promises that usually turned up empty. When you did see him, he was always so caring that you could almost forget how you felt in his absence. Things felt like they were just a few years ago, but in reality you anticipated that they would never be the same again.

Your roommate was asleep when you gently shut your door, kicking off your sneakers and shuffling over to your desk, still cluttered from an earlier study session in the morning. While putting some pens away, your gaze fell to the framed photo on your desk, the sunlight in the picture pushing some warmth into your heart.

You looked at it for a while. Those had been good times. Some of the best, even. As children, you had all dreamed of what college would be like, how much better things would be as adults, but this was the one thing you could not have anticipated.

No, it was no good reminiscing now. It was already nearly two in the morning. You sighed and turned the frame over, setting it face down on your desk. It was time for bed.

soo here it is! currently i have no plans to continue this in the near future, but we will see! feel free to come discuss it with me if you like :D

-vedya

[heliswife]

:) anon is here with a request that they thought was funny! Can I request Akito with an S/O who has a cat? S/O thinks their cat is really nice and calm but it’s actually only like that when they’re around lol. Akito goes to S/O’s house and their cat is really nice whenever S/O’s in the room but whenever the S/O leaves the cat starts swatting things off shelves and making messes and Akito attempts to fix everything really quickly cause the S/O still thinks that their cat is some kind of angel that can do no harm lol. The S/O comes back after getting snacks or something and sees their cat just sitting looking cute and Akito slumped in a chair looking exhausted after running around cleaning up after the cat :’)

( bonus scenario - a few weeks later Akito sleeps over at S/O’s house and wakes up at like 4.00 am unable to breathe cause the cat’s decided his face is now their cushion :) ) 

Good luck with school btw! I’m sure you’ll make friends soon! :) anon believes in you! :DD

-:) anon ( you don’t have to do this if you don’t have the motivation to by the way :) )

Omg i have a cat so this fic will be so silly! I wish she was nice to me tho, she's scratched me so many times and it hurts :( but here you go! And thanks for the good luck wishes! I did make some new friends and I'm more confident now!

Akito with a s/o who has a cat

You unlocked the door to your house. You had people over before, but this time it was different. Akito, your boyfriend, was coming over. You kicked your shoes off as you entered and he did the same. As you entered, a certain monster came and brushed against your leg.

"Huh, you have a cat?" Akito said. You nodded, grinning.

"Yup! Its name is (whatever name ig 💀 ill just use c/n)!" You squatted down to pet the cat, "it won't hurt you, it's really the sweetest thing, right c/n?" You got up, "Let's go to my room, 'kay?"

You and Akito sat in your room for a while, just talking and doing random stuff until you had to go do something, leaving Akito alone with the cat. For a while, it was chill until c/n gets up and starts swatting at the things on your desk. Akito tried to stop it, but its reign of terror was too much for him, and he just followed behind cleaning up after the cat.

"Aki I'm ba-" You started, but got interrupted at the scene before you: Akito slumped on a chair with zero life in his body back and your cat knocking a book down from your desk. Your cat stopped its rampage to brush against your leg, "I didn't think c/n would be this bad, sorry!"

"It's fine..." Akito mumbled.

☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆~☆

When you two went to sleep, it was mostly peaceful until c/n climbed on your bed and sat on Akitos face. You never let that go 💀

[i-did-not-mean-to]

Animal Companion

Every so often, it so happens that I'll write a Gen Fic. Here is one...

Not (as would be expected Huan, but another good boy)...Enjoy! (feat. Navëquen, my beloved)

Characters:Námo & Irmo & Gorgumoth

Words: 1 800

Warnings: /

“Here boy,” Námo called softly and smiled upon hearing the discreet footfalls, announcing the arrival of his most loyal companion.

“How are the souls?” he asked, patting Gorgumoth’s massive head tenderly while he gobbled up the treats his master was holding out to him in an invitingly extended palm. “Have you kept them in line?”

In a completely unexpected show of innocence and delight, the thus questioned being flopped onto its back and presented its soft, furry belly to the long, spindly fingers of the Lord of Mandos to welcome the congratulatory rubs and scratches that were undoubtedly deserved.

Both the Lord of the Halls of Waiting and his pet were a mystery to many—few were those who could glimpse even a fraction of their thoughts and motivations, and even fewer knew the true story behind the frightening creature at Námo’s ghostly heels.

The first thing that might have surprised those who knew little about the Fëanturi was that Gorgumoth was very much real. He was neither shadow nor dream—he was as substantial as Navëquen and just as vicious if need be.

The second was how much honest love and devotion there was between master and beast, and how much they relied on each other in their daily lives.

“How do you feel about visiting my brother?” Námo suddenly asked in a serious tone, trusting that the huge, dark canine would communicate his opinions unequivocally. “It has been a while.”

They were both easily absorbed by their work, and thus it made sense for them to also share some much-deserved time-off in another, less dismal environment with cheerier company than the ever-moaning dead.

Gorgumoth wagged his heavy tail twice, his ears perking up, and it seemed to Námo that his watchful gaze instantly grew brighter with enthusiasm.

This was to be expected, after all, it had been Irmo who had first brought the pup into the Halls of Mandos, swearing that Gorgumoth was a perfectly well-behaved being that would never gnaw on Vairë’s thread or tear Námo’s slippers to shreds.

Irmo, as was his wont when he saw fit, had blatantly lied.

“You need a friend—for companionship and succour—and I, as your loving sibling, have brought you this fluffy fellow for that exact purpose,” the Lord of Dreams had chirped, and—suspecting his sister’s, as well as his sister-in-law’s involvement—Námo had been patently unable to refuse.

Of course, Irmo had remembered how tender and loving his older brother had been to him during his own youth, and so it made sense for him to suspect that Námo was secretly yearning for someone to care for, who had not yet been traumatised by the ordeal of their demise.

At that time, Gorgumoth had been but a tiny ball of fur with huge, luminous eyes, and—even though he would never have admitted it—Námo had been devoted to him from that very first meeting on.

“His name is Gorgumoth,” Irmo had explained, “and he’s a chipper pup. He won’t mind the gloomy atmosphere and your sour mood—he just wants to be fed and loved. I know you can do that, but I feel as if you’re slowly forgetting about these strengths of yours—and I cannot let that happen.”

Thus, it had all begun, and from that moment onward, Námo was rarely seen without the ever-growing beast, following him around with the loyal admiration only dogs were ever capable of.

Bestial Maiar were always a risk, that was a universally known and brazenly disregarded truth amongst the Valar, and—after some reflection—the Lord of the Dead had judged himself just as capable and deserving of adopting and managing one of these potential catastrophes as any of his colleagues.

There was no actual time in Mandos, but Gorgumoth had grown bigger and stronger continually. To his master’s astonishment, nobody seemed to object to the muddy paw prints and the dusting of hair that consistently ruined the ephemeral, ethereal aesthetic of ever-shifting minimalism Námo usually favoured.

From that lack of protestation, Námo had soon deduced that more than just his brother had deemed him overly morose and lonely. At first, it had certainly stung his pride to realise that his friends and family had concocted the absurdly clumsy creature to palliate his isolation, but—in time—the undeniable solace the pup gave him far outweighed his petty misgivings.

“You are such a good friend,” he now said and bent down to breathe an insinuated kiss onto the dog’s brow. “Irmo really is much wiser than I give him credit for.”

Gorgumoth looked up at his Lord with twinkling eyes that seemed to say, “Of course, haven’t you raised us both?”

“No,” Námo laughed. “No, my friend, you’ve been much more obedient and eager to learn than that flighty fool has ever been.”

Indeed, Gorgumoth had—from the very start—been dutiful to a fault. Even in his earliest youth, when his paws had been too big and round to manoeuvre successfully across the polished floors of flickering grey, he had endeavoured to please and delight Námo at every opportunity he got.

He was a diligent guard dog and a skilled shepherd, making sure that all the souls in their keeping were accounted for and that none wandered off by mistake or by rebellious intent.

His undeniable, relentless competence had soon gained the respect if not the affection of the other Maiar under Námo’s care, and Gorgumoth knew exactly who to seek out for an extra treat or a good cuddle.

Even those who were not inordinately fond of his shaggy fur and wordless communication eventually came to tolerate him as a colleague of sorts—as a matter of fact, the fur-covered guardian of the Halls quite enjoyed Navëquen’s taciturn company, for example, whenever his shift had been extraordinarily wearying.

He was happy in the Halls of Waiting, he was comfortable in Vairë’s workshop, and he loved visiting Námo’s siblings, because Irmo was much more playful than his own master and occasionally threw him a stick or a ball, and Nienna gave the indisputably best cuddles.

In a word, Gorgumoth deemed himself the happiest creature in all of Eru’s creation, which did not prevent him from nudging his master’s long, shapely legs encouragingly now—he had been promised an outing, and he was eager to set out.

Obedient to a fault, Gorgumoth sat down prettily and made the evanescent ground beneath him tremble by drumming his tail against it rhythmically.

“Yes, I miss him too,” Námo admitted and shrugged. “Let’s go visit Irmo then—I am very much looking forward to his newest stroke of genius when it comes to gently manipulating everyone into doing things only he’ll find amusing.”

Gorgumoth would never have disobeyed or deserted his master, so there was no need for leashes or collars as they walked silently towards the gardens of Estë.

“Námo,” she cried as soon as she saw her brother-in-law appear like a threatening but profoundly welcome raincloud on a bright day. “And if that is not my good boy!”

Instantly, a juicy treat materialised in her hand, and she threw it high into the air to see Gorgumoth leap after it.

Her laughter felt like a soothing caress against Námo’s raw, overtaxed nerves, and—without noticing or consciously deciding to do so—he smiled as well.

“Oh, you two are good for one another,” Estë declared, evidently congratulating herself on the stroke of genius she seemed to consider herself to have been a part of. “My husband should be around here somewhere—he will be so happy to see both of you.”

Nodding patiently, the Lord of Despair and Desolation could not help but be cheered by her boundless joy; Estë was a healer to the very depths of her core, and nothing gladdened her heart more than seeing alleviating and mending measures in action, especially if those blessings were then shared and passed on.

It took a moment before he realised that Gorgumoth had not returned, and he was about to whistle when he descried his very own sister, walking beside the huge dog and talking to it softly.

Námo was not sure which of the two seemed more consoled by the other’s presence, but he decided not to interrupt their intimate conclave.

There were things he did neither know nor understand about either of these wonderful, mysterious, merciful beings, and he accepted this as a rare shortcoming of his own with all the noble humility of one who was usually right.

“Brother!” Irmo’s form coalesced out of a quickly approaching cloud of iridescent pollen dust and paper-thin mothwings. “How have you been? What an immense pleasure to see my two favourite sharp-fanged jailors here. I trust you are not in need of healing yourself?”

“In a way,” Námo replied and melted into his youngest sibling’s expected and hoped-for embrace with stoic passivity. “It was time.”

“Are you checking on me, or did you merely miss the endless treats and sweetmeats my wife and sister will conjure up for their guests of honour?” Irmo teased without letting go of the tall, lithe frame he was holding as tightly as he could.

“Nienna visits me often,” Námo grumbled. “I am thankful for her company, and I would never stoop so low as to demand or expect any kind of present.”

“Evidently, your dog does not share your high-minded sense of haughty independence,” Irmo laughed and pointed at Gorgumoth who was in the process of being thoroughly spoiled by the afore-mentioned Valiër. “You should take his example—I seem to recall that only this morning, my wife has brought fresh fruits, given by Yavanna’s grace, which she has not dried into a poultice or turned into a tea. Could nothing seduce you off your path of righteousness? Not even a pie made by my dear spouse and infused with my best wishes?”

Mellowing at Irmo’s charming coaxing more than the actual allure of the pastries, Námo gave an exaggerated sigh. “In the name of collegiality and loyalty—for he is ever faithful to me—I shall not cut short Gorgumoth’s well-deserved enjoyment. You may lead me to those liberally commended baked goods, and I shall follow meekly.”

Irmo shook his head indulgently, threw his arm around his brother’s shoulder, and pulled him towards the small table in the shade of an old Weeping Willow resolutely—he had known and loved Námo for too long to believe even for a single second that the stuffy, old curmudgeon objected to any part of this situation in the least.

Seeing his master move away, Gorgumoth gave a short huff of alarm and then bounded after the swirling clouds of darkness and dreams with joyful anticipation, leaving the Ladies chuckle indulgently at his shenanigans.

Thank you so much for reading <3

-> Masterlist for November (by @cilil)

[greatdigitalone]

Transforming My Home into a Haven: A Review of "Training Your Dogs And Cats Digital - Ebooks"

Living with furry companions is an absolute joy, but let's be honest, sometimes their behaviour can leave us feeling a little exasperated. From chewed slippers to scratched furniture, a little training can go a long way in creating a harmonious home for both you and your pets. That's where "Training Your Dogs And Cats Digital - Ebooks" comes in, and let me tell you, it's been a game-changer in my household.

Understanding the Importance of the Human-Animal Bond

The ebooks go beyond simply teaching tricks. They emphasise the importance of building a strong bond with your pet, rooted in mutual respect and understanding. This resonated deeply with me. I wanted my training efforts to not just curb bad behaviour, but to truly strengthen the connection between me and my dog, Luna, and my cat, Milo. The ebooks provide valuable insights into animal behaviour, helping you see the world through your pet's eyes. This newfound understanding has transformed the way I interact with them, fostering a more positive and enriching environment for everyone.

Tailored Training for Dogs and Cats

One of the things that impressed me most was the program's recognition that "one size does not fit all" when it comes to pet training. Dogs and cats, despite sharing our homes, have very different communication styles and motivations. The ebooks offer specific training techniques for each species, acknowledging their unique behavioural traits.

For Luna, the eager-to-please canine, the ebooks introduced positive reinforcement methods that utilise treats and praise to encourage good behaviour. We've seen fantastic results with commands like "sit," "stay," and "come," and Luna's excitement to learn keeps our training sessions fun and engaging.

Milo, on the other hand, is the epitome of feline independence. The ebooks highlight the importance of patience and respect for a cat's natural boundaries. Positive reinforcement still plays a role, but with a focus on clicker training and creating a reward system tailored to what motivates Milo (in his case, the irresistible allure of a dangling feather toy!).

Accessible and User-Friendly Resources

The ebooks themselves are well-written and easy to understand, with clear explanations and step-by-step instructions. They're packed with valuable information, but never overwhelming. The digital format is fantastic – I can easily access the ebooks on my phone or tablet, allowing me to revisit specific sections whenever I need a refresher or encounter a new challenge.

The ebooks are complemented by helpful visuals like diagrams and photographs, making it easy to grasp even the more complex training techniques. There's also a fantastic glossary that provides clear definitions of key terms, ensuring I never feel lost in the world of animal behaviour.

Building a More Peaceful Home

Since starting the program, I've seen a remarkable difference in my pets' behaviour. Luna's newfound focus makes walks a pleasure, and the days of chewed slippers are thankfully behind us. Milo no longer feels the need to scratch the furniture, and we now share playful moments using the techniques outlined in the ebooks.

More importantly, the training has strengthened the bond between us. Luna's excitement to learn and please me is heartwarming, and Milo now actively seeks out interaction, something I wouldn't have thought possible before. My home feels calmer and more peaceful, and the credit goes to the "Training Your Dogs And Cats Digital - Ebooks" program.

If you're looking for a positive, effective, and accessible way to train your furry companions, I wholeheartedly recommend this program. It's an investment in a happier, more harmonious home for you and your pets.

[upat4amwiththemoon]

Liho the cat

Summary: Liho adopts another human for himself.

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x female!reader

Warnings: none

Word count: 1074

a/n: so sorry for the long pause in stories! Life sucks and I haven’t had any motivation to write

Tags: @thought-of-you-and-me @strangegardentaco @rafecameronswhore

“Wanda?” Natasha walks into the small reading corner where Wanda is reading her book. She hums quietly, putting her finger to the spot she was on. “Have you seen Liho?”

“I haven’t.”

Natasha sighs. “Okay, thanks.” She walks away before Wanda can answer, heading towards the kitchen when Yelena is. “Lena! Where’s Liho?”

“Why would I know?” Yelena whines with her mouth full of food. “It’s your cat. Isn’t he an outside cat? Check there.”

“Yes, but usually he comes back before sundown. So I’m worried.”

“You don’t have a tracker on him or something?”

“No.”

“Well, maybe you should’ve thought about that before letting him roam free.” Yelena mumbles, putting her empty dishes into the sink. Natasha glares at her, making the younger sister roll her eyes. “I’m sure he is alright and will come home soon. Stop worrying.”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

Fanny trots to Yelena, pushing her head against her leg. Yelena crouches down to scratch the spot behind her ears. “Such a good girl, yes you are. You’d never leave me alone like Liho.” Natasha groans, rolling her eyes as she walks away from the kitchen.

The next day goes by quickly, though the longer Liho is missing the more worried Natasha is getting. Finally, at five, Liho jumps in through Natasha’s room window.

“There you are!” Natasha picks up Liho, snuggling her face into his soft fur. “Where have you been, sweet boy?” She whispers, kissing his head.

Liho jumps to the floor, meowing as if answering back. Natasha takes a small tracker from the side table and clips it onto Liho’s collar.

“Now I’ll know where you go on your travels.” She smiles. “Did you have fun? You don’t usually stay the night away.”

Talking to Liho is one of the only things that actually make Natasha feel happy and comforted. Her cat is like a safe haven after a rough day at work. Not that she’d ever let the other Avengers know she is having full blown conversations with him, even though they do exactly the same thing.

“You don’t mind me following you around during your trips, right? No you don’t.” Natasha coos and rubs her hand from his head to the tip of his tail. “Did you make some new friends?” Liho purrs. “Oh you did, huh?” She laughs quietly. “I gotta meet them then.”

After few hours Liho jumps outside from the open window. Natasha opens an app on her phone and stares at the moving dot on the map. It moves in a calm pace, going from one place to another, never stopping for too long. But eventually, the dot stops. Natasha puts the road’s name to Google Maps and checks what’s on the street.

Natasha hums. There are only apartments nearby, nothing interesting enough for Liho to stay there for a long time. But he does. He stays on the same spot the whole night.

In the morning, after two hours of sleep, Natasha decides to drive to the address. When she arrives there, she parks her car across the street, having a clear sight to the house Liho is at but trying her best not to seem like a creep.

One of the window’s facing towards her has the curtains pulled to the side and it’s slightly open, giving Nat a way to see inside the house.

Nothing happens for a long time. Natasha sighs, checking her phone once more to make sure this is the right place. She puts her hand to the key to start her car, but freezes when she notices movement from the window. A woman with a big smile on her face is talking. First Natasha thinks she’s just carzy, but then Liho sits down in front of her.

Natasha gasps. She looks as the woman opens a can of cat food and sets it to a plate, at times petting Liho.

Somehow Natasha can’t take her eyes away from the woman. She is the most beautiful woman she has ever seen. “No wonder you’ve been spending all you time here. I’d rather stay the nights with pretty women than a loud and messy group of people.” Natasha mumbles to herself, opening the car door.

Walking up to the door, she knocks and waits for a moment before it opens. “Hi!” The woman peeks behind the door, hiding her pajamas from Natasha’s eyes, even though she already saw them through the window. “How can I help you?”

“Hi.” Natasha grins. “I think my cat is here.”

“Oh!” Her eyes widen. “He’s your cat? I’m so sorry, he came in through my window a few weeks back and I fed him, and he’s been back almost every day since. I can go get him.”

“No, no, no. It’s okay, don’t worry. I just wanted to see where he was spending his time.”

“Oh, okay.” The woman smiles. “I’m Y/N, by the way.” She giggles nervously.

“Natasha. Nice to meet you.”

“You too. Would you, uh, like to come in? For coffee?”

Natasha smirks. “I’d love to.”

Y/N opens the door wider, letting her in. “Make yourself at home, I have to change. Your cat is in the kitchen.” She gives her a quick smile and leaves to her bedroom, closing the door.

Natasha walks to the kitchen where Liho is eating the food. “Have I already told you, that you are the best cat in the world.” She kneels down to pet him. “Scoring me with a pretty lady. Such a good wingman.” Finishing his food, Liho meows and butts his head against her knee.

“He’s adorable.” Y/N comments as she walks in and puts the coffee machine on. “What’s his name?”

“Liho.” Natasha stands up properly. “I hope this isn’t weird, me suddenly showing up to your house.”

“No! Not at all.” Y/N shakes her head. “I don’t mind the company.”

“Good.” Natasha smiles and leans against a table. “He chose a great place to crash in.”

Y/N laughs. “How come?”

“Very cozy looking, a lot of food and pets from a pretty girl.” She smirks as the color of Y/N’s cheeks change into a darker shade of red.

“Well, she has a very pretty owner as well.” She mumbles with a smile. Natasha’s smirk only widens. She turns to look at Liho and winks at him, mouthing good job, before turning back to Y/N and continuing her flirting.

[ibelongtowrath]

May I request the "Drop the towel" challenge NSFW headcannons with the Side characters and their reactions with a female MC? Like the one's you did last time but just for the side characters (Minus Luke of course) Thanks in advance and I love your writing btw :D

Drop The Towel Challenge + Side Characters

thank you! yes, of course you can bb hehe. this took forever & i’m sorry, i’ve lost so much motivation to write but since i had this half finished i tried to push through & do the rest tags/warnings: 18+/NSFW, mentions of female anatomy word count: 1k characters: diavolo, barbatos, simeon, solomon

diavolo.

He’s a bit clueless at first, raising an eyebrow in curiosity as you confidently stride through the large double doors of his palace office and stand before his desk.

“Hm?” he muses, pushing himself back and rising from his desk to wrap you in his embrace, slow strokes of his fingers through your hair and down your back. “What’s this? You were so eager to see me, you couldn’t wait until I was done? Did you really walk through the castle in just your...?”

He doesn’t quite register your intent right away as your towel drops; he reaches down to the floor to pick it up, holding it out to you.

“MC! You dropped your-”

His molten gold eyes glint with desire as he looks up, raking over every inch of your naked form.

Before you know it, you’re bent over his desk as he knees your thighs apart, reaching for both your wrists to hold together behind your back.

“Is this what you wanted?” he growls into your ear, keeping one hand gripped tightly around your wrists as he begins to undo his trousers with the other, demon form emerging in the blink of an eye. “Then don’t mind if I indulge you, princess.”

barbatos.

An early weekend morning at the castle, Barbatos keeps himself busy preparing breakfast and tea, bustling about in the royal kitchen.

The scent of freshly-brewed tea permeates the air, light and fresh, and he doesn’t even hear you come in over the sound of the liquid pouring into the porcelain cups.

Dropping your towel as he delicately places the cups on a tray, you grin, watching as he turns around; the typically cool and composed butler can’t help himself at the sight of you standing there naked, a growl tearing from his lips as his horns and tail emerge.

Tea and food forgotten as the oven timer goes off and beeps endlessly in the background, he barely hears it as he presses his chest flush to your back, snaking his forked tail down the length of your body, delighting in your shivers of pleasure as the appendage ghosts over the goosebumps pricked across your skin.

“I thought you might be hungry,” he purrs, skimming his lips along the delicate skin of your neck as his tail slides between your legs.

“And you certainly are, my pet,” he muses, chuckling at the way your slick already generously coats the ends of his tail, “but perhaps not for what I have prepared.”

One end glides over your clit; the other, slipping into your wet heat as your head drops back against him, letting out a soft moan. 

“No, I will satiate you in another manner. I promise you will be quite full, pet.”

simeon.

Teacup pressed to his lips, he smiles softly, watching you pad across the room after emerging from the bathroom, small tufts of steam following behind, scented with tendrils of your shampoo.

Inhaling deeply, Simeon’s eyes close briefly before turning back to his work before him: a large manuscript, perhaps a prequel to TSL, thick pages adorned with hasty scribbles in the margins.

“Don’t wait up for me, darling,” he sighs, shaking his head as he lets his eyes linger on your silhouette, barely shrouded by the thin fabric of the towel. “I’m afraid I’ll be pulling another late night, and I wouldn’t want you to lose out on sleep with a full day of classes ahead of you.”

He turns back to his work, the sound of his quill pen scratching across the page the only sound; that is, before the soft thump! of your towel hitting the ground causes his movements to halt.

The angel doesn’t turn to look at you; instead, he smirks, exercising his patience and self-control, wanting to tease you first before giving in to what you, and subsequently he, wants as he slowly turns around in his chair, raising an eyebrow, hungry eyes raking over your now-naked form standing before him, beads of water rolling over your torso and between your hips.

“My, my, I have a naughty little lamb on my hands tonight, don't I?” Simeon coos, slowly rising from his chair. “Trying to distract me from my work, hm? Even though you know how important finishing this manuscript is? I suppose I'll just have to punish you...”

Your lips part to respond, but the angel is quicker than you anticipate; within mere seconds, he's pinned you down on the bed, pressing his knee to your thighs to urge them apart, his trousers suddenly feeling all too tight.

solomon.

The sorcerer's eyes briefly flit to your scantily-clad form, the tiny towel nearly revealing that which is barely hidden underneath.

Solomon chuckles knowingly; he might be thousands of years old, but he's kept up with the TikTok trends, anticipating exactly what you're about to do, turning back to the books of spells splayed open before him upon his desk.

"Did you really think that would work on me?" Solomon chuckles, eyes scanning the pages of incantations as he flicks his wrist.

"What do y-" you start to respond, questioning the movement; suddenly, you find yourself rendered speechless as your towel is ripped from your form by a large, swirling tendril of magic.

It curls around your body, silvery shimmers swimming before your very eyes as it binds your wrists behind your back, watching another tendril appearing from seemingly thin air.

Even more tentacles of magic appear, eliciting gasps of surprise and pleasure that fall from your lips in delicious symphonies as one slides between your legs; another rising to tease the now-hardened buds of your nipples, swirling and writhing, pulsing with frenetic energy.

Though he does plan to indulge you eventually, Solomon grins, fully planning to edge and tease you for as long as he sees fit, feeding off your desire through the magic as he feels himself harden beneath his pants.

"Now, do be a dear and keep making those noises for me, pet, and be sure to enjoy yourself," he says, tone seemingly calm, biting back a groan upon hearing your lewd gasps grow higher in pitch. "Though I hope you have plenty of stamina. I can keep this up for a long while."

[spideymarvelws]

ooo!! no pressure but- #9 in random with in-game!techno? (i hope ur day's been alright!!)

my day has been decent lmaoo but your request definitely made it better😊I hope you enjoy!

Main Masterlist / Add Yourself To My Taglist / Prompt List

Prompt : “I want to try something,” “Oh god, please no.”

Warnings : just cute floof, mentions of killing, the voices being pricks

Word Count : 1.6k

Flowers Coated In Colour

Technoblade x GN!Reader

Techno let out a small sigh as he saw his cottage come into view. It was a long day for the piglin, with the sudden betrayal of Tommy, doomsday happening tomorrow and the extensive preparations for whatever dream had in store, it was safe to say that he was burnt out for the day.

His backed weighed heavy with supplies and tools, along with all the voices who just repeated the same thing over and over in his head.

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD 

BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD 

He ended up killing a lot more animals and mobs that necessary in hopes that they might calm and decrease his aching head ache but nothing worked. They only grew more violent, frustrated with him that his sword met the body of a sheep and not the neck of a member of L'Manburg.

Which is why he rushed home, reaching the snowy biome earlier that anticipated. The sun was close to setting as he rode Carl into the stables, feeding him a little bit of hay and renewing his water before stepping back out and closing the fence shut.

He trudged to the front of the house, opening the door and slamming it shut, cursing that he might've woken you up. You often fell asleep in his arms and today was no exception. After returning home from the event at the community house (well, what was left of it), you both comforted each other by the fireplace, keeping each other close while whispering sweet and reassuring words.

It was one of the rare times the voices went silence, completely replaced by your presence. No wonder they were so rowdy now, pounding in the back of his head like splinters digging into his skin.

They must pay for there crimes

They have no chance against us

Manburg with fall

Dream seems sketchy

He might use you too

He will use you too

He fell back against the wooden doors, his rough hands slapping against his face, scratching at the scared skin. He wants to destroy L'Manburg, he wanted to watch as the country fell under his wrath, destroying the land it stood on.

The only thing keeping his back was you, was Phil, was all his pets and memories he held at his now joke of a secret home. Quackity and the rest of the butcher army had gotten to them once, used them against him and almost had him executed and you killed if it wasn't for Dream and Punz interfering. Phil had been put on house arrest and Carl stolen from his grasp.

Whose to say they wouldn't do it again? Whose to say that his efforts would lead to nothing but a stronger country that might end up a bigger threat to his cause.

Techno didn't have much weaknesses, some may argue that he had none at all. But he knew from the very beginning that his weakness was his relationships with a select few of people on the SMP and knowing that others were figuring that out as well, he was putting everyone he was close with at risk.

He felt unhinged, the small control he’s been holding on to for so long unraveling by the seems. He trying to keep it for tomorrow, but the voices only started to convince him more and more that he should walk into L’Manburg by himself and take out everyone in their sleep.

That wasn’t what his motives were. He wanted to take down the country, not the people. 

But the voices demanded blood.

Suddenly, he felt the soft touch of hands on his, closing around them and prying them off his face, breaking him out of his internal conflict. He hesitantly opened his eyes, meeting your worried, glittering eyes. 

And suddenly, everything went silent.

“Everything alright their Tech?” you asked, squeezing his hands for comfort.

He blinked, mustering a small smile for you, “Yeah, yeah everything’s... perfect.”

You nodded, letting go of his hands and moving them to his neck.

“Phil’s already asleep if that’s what you wondering,” you said softly, helping him take off his massive cape and resting it to the side. 

He hummed in acknowledgment, carefully prying off his skull mask over his face and taking off his crown with a huff and setting both items down besides his red cape.

“Well aren't you a sight for sore eyes,” you smiled up at him, taking his face into the palms of your hands. He sighed at the warmth, melting into your touch. He engulfed your small hands in his, finding comfort in your soft skin. 

“Long day?”

“You wouldn’t believe.”

You leaned up on your tiptoes and pressed a quick kiss to the tip of his nose, sending a wave of pink up his face and his large ears to wiggle in delight. Usually, he would shake his head, move away from your affection. But in recent times he’s learnt to accept it and reciprocate it in the best way he could.

“Then come on then,” you cooed, taking his hand and pulling him to the carpet in front of the fireplace that had a mountain of pillows and blankets. You loved to snuggle into them, sometimes reading stories to Edward or just watching the flames slowly disappear.

You fell back against blankets, crossing your legs and placing a pillow in the middle. You raised your arms, gesturing for him to join you. He gave you a questioning look but gave in quickly, dragging his body and settling down on the floor, letting his back fall and his head bounce on the pillow in your lap. One of his legs were bent, the other laid out on the ground, his hands clasped together on his stomach.

“What are you doing?” he questioned, eye brows raised.

"I want to try something," you mumbled, passing your hand through his hair.

"Oh god, please no." he grumbled, but his tone contrasted to his movements. His eyes closed with his head tilted backwards, snorting in appreciation at your touch.

You rolled your eyes, tugging harshly at his hair changing his happy noises to a playful growl, "It's nothing bad Techno,"

"Well knowing you, that statement means nothing."

You scoffed, "Glad to know you think so highly of me,”

He whined when your hands felt his hair, glaring up at you. You looked down at him with a playful smile, squeezing his cheeks and making him pout, “Who knew the blood god was such a softie,”

His nose flared while you giggled at his reaction, reaching behind you and grabbing something he couldn't see.

“Now relax... I won’t be doing anything bad I promise.”

He was about to protest until he felt your fingers entangle themselves in. his hair once again, lulling back into a meditative state. You hummed as you worked on his hair, sometimes he would feel something thin and sharp poke at his scalp but he payed no mind to it.

As much as he loved anarchy and chaos, he would give up anything to stay like like with you forever. It was hard for him to trust people but when he did, he took advantage of the love and  you gave him and held everything you did together to his heart, valuing it more than money or strong tools and gear.

After a while, he started to doze off on your lap, eyes fluttering shut while you continued to work on his hair. After a few minutes, you finally finished.

“Done.” you whispered, shaking him out of his light slumber.

“I’m scared.” he mumbled, snuggling further into your lap.

“Hey, hey, don’t move.” you stilled his head with your hands, “You’re going to knock them out.”

“Knock what out?” he questioned, only to have you wave a mirror in front of his face. 

He bit his lip at the sight, grumbling under his breath. In his hair held various flowers, shades of blue, purple and pink standing out against his light pink locks. You gently tucked a rose pricked of its thorns behind his ear, leaning down to quickly peck his forehead.

“Now that you have short hair, I wanted to see if I could still decorate your hair without braiding it in,” you said shyly, “It’s not the most secure but I made it work..”

Techno chuckled, “You really miss the long hair don’t you?”

You nodded, twirling a loose piece of pink between your fingers, “More that you imagine... but- I think it’s growing on me.”

“That’s great,” he yawned, “Yeah, that’s great.”

You laughed, caressing the side of his face lightly, “Get some rest Techno, you got a big day tomorrow,”

He hummed, letting his eyes flutter shut, “Yeah... I do don’t I?”

You nodded, “Blowing up a country does call for rest,”

“Why yes-” he yawned once more, “Yes it does,”

With that he started to doze off, his cheek pressed against the cushion beneath him as his head lolled to the side. He wasn’t expecting to get any sleep tonight, he was ready to stay up all night, doing mindless tasks to distract him from the voices that never shut up in his head.

But while your touch faded from his mind, his breath lengthening into an even pattern, he knew everything would be alright.

As long as he had you...

Everything would be alright.

BONUS :

“Hey, what’s that in your hair techno?” dream asked as he sat comfortably on the obsidian grid, pointing to behind the anarchists head.

“Heh?” he sounded, his hand shooting to his hair and pulling out a small purple flower, slightly withered and blood coating the edges of the petals.

He smiled softly, letting his thumb pass on the delicate flower. Pocketing the plant, he kept his head high, adjusting his hold on his sword. He knew that it would further deteriorate in the small enclosure but he wanted proof to take home to you to say that your new methods of decorating his hair was more effective than you thought.

“Nothing Dream...” he finally mumbled, biting the inside of his lip to hide the smile forming on his face, “nothing at all...”

...

I like to think that techno lets out piglin noises when he’s happy🥰

Permanent Taglist (Dream SMP) : @ossinsworld @lunarinnit @chaosofsmarty

Technoblade Taglist : @hyumiid @whenpugzfly @sammyxn