#only choice now is whether to finish the first one or jump right into the next haha

[vulpinesaint]

bed covered in books feeling fucking fanTASTIC

[chaotic-toasters]

Keep in Touch

If you cried, please let me know. I cried while writing this and now I feel like a wimp

Jen Beattie x Teen!Reader Arsenal WFC x Teen!Reader --------------------

You awoke to the creaking of your bedroom door, followed by the dipping of your bed.

"Hey, kiddo," your mam's voice soft, fingers carding through your hair. "Time to wake up. We've got a big day ahead of us."

You cracked your eyes open, blinking rapidly at the light streaming through your window. "Five more minutes?"

She smiled fondly. "Sorry, kiddo. We've got to finish packing, and then we're gonna meet the girls at Colney one last time before they send us off at the airport."

A few months ago, you and your mam had received almost identical offers from the newest team in the NWSL, Bay FC. Your mam had jumped at the promise of something new, but you'd hesitated.

Arsenal was all you'd ever known. You'd grown up in the academy, winning tournaments left and right before signing your first professional contract for the gunners at fifteen years old.

You had memories of Katie chasing you through the Emirates, practicing pens with Kim, and doing media with Leah. If you left, you wouldn't get to make any more of those memories that were so near and dear to your heart.

It was a difficult decision to make, one that your mam assured you was totally up to you. Any of the girls would take you in in a heartbeat if you wanted to stay.

You hated change, and you hated the position Bay FC's offer put you in. Whether you stayed or left, your life wouldn't be the same.

Stay, and be an ocean away from your mam.

Leave, and abandon everything you'd ever known since you were a wee child.

Stay or leave.

Your mam or your found family.

Pain or pain.

Stay.

Leave.

Stay.

Leave.

Realistically, as much as you dwelled on the decision, the choice was made the second you opened your email.

You could never leave your mam. Your mam who never forced you to do anything you didn't want to. Your mam who always made time for you. Your mam who would stay home from matches or training when you were sick. Your mam who always supported you and loved you.

So, you accepted. You accepted the offer to leave the WSL behind, comforted only by the knowledge that your mam would be right next to you the whole time.

It had hurt to accept the California team's offer, a metaphorical knife to the gut, but your teammates had reminded you that you were still in the early stages of your career and could come back later on. That had brought you some sense of relief, knowing that they would gladly welcome you back if you wanted to return.

But now, on the final day of your life in London, it all came crashing down, and you suddenly did not want to leave.

"O-kayyy," you mumbled, rolling off the bed. "When do we leave? To Colney?"

Your mam extended her hand, pulling you up. "In an hour. Get the rest of your stuff, and we'll have breakfast on the way."

-------------------

"He—oof!" You grunted as someone tackled you into a hug, taking you both to the floor.

"I'm gonna miss you, kiddo," Leah's voice wavered. "So, so much."

You squeezed her tightly. "I'll miss you too, Lee. Who'll make fun of your five year-old diet now?"

Katie joined you on the floor, stealing you from Leah's embrace to pull you into her own. "I will, kid. Don't ye' worry."

Leah wiped away a stray tear. "You remember this, Y/N. Once a gunner, always a gunner. You hear me? You'll always have a place hear at Arsenal."

You smiled sadly as yet another one of your teammates stole you for a hug. "Thanks, Lee. I'm gonna miss you all so, so much."

"She was proper crabbit this mornin'," your mam said with a sad smile of her own. "She cried, yelled at me, cried again, then walked into the door frame because she couldn't see through her tears."

"Maaaam!" You turned red as your teammates laughed. "That didn't happen!"

Kim ruffled your hair. "It's okay, sweetheart. You did that exact thing with a goalpost when you were younger."

You tried unsuccessfully to hold in your laughter. "Kimmy!"

Your mam grinned. "Nothin' I'd rather be doing during my last day as a gunner than making fun of Y/N with you all."

Unfortunately for you, that was all that you and your teammates did for the remainder of your time together. Make fun of you. Oh, to be the baby of the gunners.

-------------------

"I don't want you to leave," Kyra murmured, gripping your shoulders desperately as your flight was called. "You're like... my little sister."

You softened at the uncharacteristically wholesome confession, hugging the Aussie who you'd grown so close to tightly. "Keep in touch, Ky. We'll be sure to visit."

"You promise?" you'd never heard Kyra so vulnerable, not even when Australia had lost to England in the Semifinals and been knocked out of the World Cup.

"I promise. I love you."

"I love you too, Y/N."

It was Kim who scooped you up into a hug last, the Scotswoman practically having watched you grown up since your birth. Your second parent in the absence of your father.

"We'll miss you here, kiddo," she whispered in your ear as you tried to hold back tears. It was almost comical, the short Midfielder having to stand on her tippi toes to do so, barely able to reach you even as you leaned down to hear her. "You'd better call or I'm boardin' the nearest fly to San Francisco and takin' you back home."

You patted her on the back before pulling away, averting your eyes before you started bawling. "I will, Kimmy. I will."

As you and your mam boarded the plane, you shoved your fist into your mout to choke back a sob.

Sitting in your seat, the tearful goodbyes of your teammates echoed in your head. They hadn't wanted you to go, and you hadn't entirely wanted go either, torn between two sides, but you'd known this was the right decision. You'd stay with your mam, broadening your horizons and giving yourself more experience.

Staring out the window, you took in the landscape. The English landscape that you'd known your whole life, left behind as you started a new adventure in the United States.

As the plane took off, Leah's voice echoed in your head.

Once a gunner, always a gunner.

[girlboypersonthingy]

Totally not requested Hazbin Hotel piece…BRO IM OBSESSED. Just something cute and cheesy about your first day at the hotel and how you’re greeted by each resident/staff. Any Hazbin requests, send em my way!

New Arrival!!! 🏩

Charlie ❤️‍🔥

Obvi Charlie is the one who found you and told you all about her hotel, dragging you along “just for a tour” she says in a sweet voice. And you follow along (whether you really want to or not) bc she’s just so kind and energetic and she’s the first caring person you’ve met since you landed in hell. You can’t break her heart after your first meeting :(

Once at the hotel, she’s practically screaming from excitement.

“WE HAVE A NEW ARRIVAL!!! NEEWWW ARRIVAALLLLL~” she sings with her angelic voice, making you crack a small smile at first until it hits you-

“Whoa whoa, wait! I never said I’m staying, you said it’s just a tour!” She pretty much ignores the annoyed look on your face, smiling brightly at you still as she holds her hand out for you.

“By the time I’m through with you, you’ll never want to leave!” Her smile faltered a little. “Well, it’s your choice, I’m not gonna force you. I just have a feeling you’re really gonna like it here.”

At that, your smile grows a bit and you take her hand as she begins showing you around.

It’s very flattering that not only has she offered you her friendship before even learning your name, she is also giving you a tour of her hotel and offering you a room, but the best part…

As she guides you around, she’s asking you all sorts of questions about yourself, your past, where you came from and how you’re adjusting to your new life (afterlife?)

As you pass by a tall gentleman with red hair and a huge smile, he greets Charlie as “princess” and you’re like “oh, is that your dad or something?” She she so plainly responds “oh, no. Lucifer is actually.”

And you choke on your spit for a second, pulling your hand away from hers now (holy shit were you holding hands that whole time?)

“Oh shit! I-I’m so sorry. I had no idea you’re the Princess of Hell. Wow! Should I like…bow to you or…?” Charlie lets out a bright giggle, her eyes closing as she holds her stomach.

“No no no! Please, I’m just Charlie, okay?” And now she’s holding your hand again, continuing her tour.

She gradually introduces you to each staff member and resident you guys pass.

By the end of her tour, you’ve forgotten pretty much everyone else’s name besides Charlie’s.

She is standing right in front of you, both of you in the center of the lobby of the hotel. You’re sort of unintentionally tuning her voice out as you watch her talk, taking note of how bright and shiny her fangs are and how cute she looks in a suit like that and how she’s so pure and heroic and gorgeous and funny and generous and-

“(Y/N)? You okay?” Her saying your name snapped you back to reality. “Sorry, yeah. Uh what were you saying?” “What do you think?”

The nervous but excited face she makes as she awaits your reply is the cutest shit omfggggg ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥 you take a while to answer just so you can stay this close to her and admire her adorable facial marks and her big eyes.

“I’d love to stay. I’m…not sure if I’m worthy of being redeemed but…I’d like to see more of you- I MEAN what you’re doing here and maybe help out if you need?”

She literally jumps in the air and fist pumps, letting out a loud “WOOHOO!!!” This pulls a soft laugh from your mouth and suddenly as she looks back at you, tears are forming in her eyes and you’re so confused about the sudden mood swing.

“Hey, uh…what’s-“ and before you can finish, she’s hugging you so softly, her eyes closed but her smile never fading.

“I won’t let you down, (Y/N). You’re gonna love it here, I promise.” She pulls back, her hands on your shoulders to keep you close to her as she looks you in the eye. This moment lasts only a few seconds but (both of) you feel your heart jumping in your chest and your mouth go dry.

“Well! Follow me to your room~” She waves a hand at you before turning her back to you and leading the way. As you follow behind her, admiring how her long blonde hair sways with each step, you can feel yourself becoming hot from the nerves, thinking to yourself…

‘Omg…first day down here and I am now living with the princess of hell? I could definitely get used to this.’

Lucifer 🍎🐍

You were actually a good friend of Angel Dust for a while and when he told you all about the new place he was staying, first of all you were happy he was spending less time with Val abd more time with some positive influences, and also you were really interested in Charlie and what she was doing for your fellow sinners.

Eventually, Angel convinces you to come over one day to meet Charlie and maybe possibly talk to her about staying, seeing as you’d like to redeem yourself or at least try.

You’re super nervous, not having many other friends in hell and often staying alone and secure indoors. You’re pretty sheltered now a days…so it’s weird going to meet new people.

Unfortunately, you walked into the Hazbin Hotel with Angel at the worst possible time.

Charlie was ranting and talking to herself, pacing the lobby of the hotel with messy hair and majorly disheveled clothes.

“Uh…what’s up with her?” Angel ask as he points to Charlie, looking over at Vaggie. Vaggie just shakes her head as she approaches Charlie, trying to calm her down.

When Charlie spots you, she smooths her hair back and takes a deep breath, embarrassed that this is your first impression of her.

She introduces herself, a manic look in her eyes still.

“Hi im Charlie! You must be (Y/N)! YAY! Welcome. Sorry, my father will be here soon so…it’s just a little bit on the hectic side today!” Her eye twitches but her smile stays big and shiny.

Holy shit…you’re gonna get to meet the Princess AND the King of Hell in the same day? As if you weren’t already anxious…

You look around to see everyone else cleaning, hanging banners, preparing snacks and you decide to start helping while also very awkwardly trying to introduce yourself and make small talk with everyone else.

“Okay okay OKAY! He’s almost here!” Charlie says looking somewhat excited and nervous at the same time.

You stayed glued to Angel’s side, internally having a panic attack. This day was becoming overwhelming.

Lucifer himself finally walks through the door, immediately focusing on his daughter as well as her three darling pets.

He’s…not at all what you expected but…somehow he’s better? You pictured him being bigger and scarier and in darker clothing but he’s actually….really fucking cute. Like an adorable dorky kind of cute.

You’re just at a loss for words. Watching as he talks to Charlie and argues with Alastor.

Angel gently elbows your arm to get your attention. “You good, hun?”

Your breath gets caught in your throat as you nod, eyes still fixed on Lucifer.

All you can do is bunch up the fabric from your clothes in your hands tightly, your breathing becoming more rapid as he gives a kind greeting to all of the staff and residents, slowly approaching you.

“And this is (Y/N)! They actually just got here today. I haven’t even had time to show them around yet.” Charlie smiles, looking back and forth between you and her dad.

“Oh, nice to meet you! It’s uh…t-truly an honor, sir. I-I-“ You can’t seem to get another word out once his smile grows, his sharp teeth making an appearance now.

Lucifer took your hand, not really shaking it but just holding it snug in his own.

“Please, please, just call me Lucifer. The pleasure is all mine.”

The eye contact lasts longer than either of you wanted it to. It wasn’t bad, it was just nerve wracking for the both of you. It was only a few seconds of intense staring and soft blushes creeping up before Alastor and Charlie were dragging you two along for a tour.

And commence the hardcore pining for the rest of the day!

As you all stroll from room to room and down long hallways, you two check off every cliche romcom movie moment in the book!

Your hands brush up against each other’s

You keep catching each other staring

You both go to talk at the same time, then both stop, then both giggle and look away and insist the other go first.

At one point, you sort of bump into each other trying to walk through a doorway and then it’s the awkward back and forth of “Sorry, you go ahead.” “Oh no, you first!” “No, no, I insist.” As you’re standing way too close to each other, both stuttering and acting like absolute idiots.

By the end of the hotel tour, your face is redder than Charlie’s suit and our short king has started to break a sweat, avoiding eye contact with you at all costs.

But you’re both grinning so big, it’s ridiculous

“So, you’re gonna be staying here?” He asks confidently, giving you a charming smile.

“Oh uhm…y-yeah. Sure. If Charlie will have me, that is.” Your reply has Charlie squealing with excitement as Angel watches you and Lucifer interact.

“Magnificent! Good for you. I’ll be seeing you around then, (Y/N).” Lucifer says your name so sweetly it causes you to start blushing all over again.

You’re also blushing bc from behind Lucifer, Angel is winking at you, making kissy faces and humping the air as his way of taunting you and your very obvious crush on the king of hell

Little do you know…he’s got a crush too 🤭

Vaggie ⚔️

Obvi, Charlie introduced you two seeing how Vaggie is Charlie’s right hand man, best friend and protector.

Vaggie is immediately suspicious of you, watching your every move with a tight lined frown on her lips. In her defense, she’s suspicious of every new person she meets.

“This is Vaggie! My best friend and number one supporter here.” Charlie smiles so big it forces her eyes to squint closed. “And thiisssss is (Y/N). Hopefully, maybe…our newest resident?”

The straight faced girl gives you a quick nod followed by a soft “Hey.”

“Hey. Nice to meet you. That’s a cool name, Vaggie. I like it.”

Now she’s feeling a bit less up tight. I mean…You like her name??? That softened her just a tad.

You offer Charlie a small smirk as you shrug. “I dunno. You’re gonna have to give me a tour first, princess.”

And suddenly, Charlie is pulling you along by your wrist, babbling on and on about every detail of the hotel as Vaggie follows behind you two.

You can’t help but keep glancing over at the quiet, long haired girl following you guys. You had hardly even heard her voice yet but there was something about her that made you feel weirdly comfortable and nervous at the same time.

After the tour, Charlie is doing a little happy dance in front of you, eagerly awaiting your reply to her question of whether you’ll stay or not.

You can’t help but laugh at her and how cute and kind she is.

As you open your mouth to give her an answer, your voice seems to give out and you’re totally caught off guard by a soft and slightly low chuckle from beside you.

You look over to see Vaggie now standing closer to you than before and this is the first time you’re seeing her crack a smile.

“Y-yeah, sure. I’ll stay.” You reply, but more so to Vaggie than to Charlie.

“WHOOOO!!!! NEW RESIDENT! We have to celebrate!” Charlie screams out in excitement causing the other residents and staff members to give a little cheer before they all swarmed around the bar, pestering Husk for drinks.

You stayed planted in your spot, still eyeing Vaggie right beside you. You two stand alone, apart from the rest of the group at the bar.

“Welcome aboard, (Y/N). It’ll be nice to have a new face around and…you seem normal enough.” Vaggie finally offers you her hand, a warm smile still on her lips.

You take her hand and give it a gentle shake, your face becoming so hot and flushed that you have to look away and wipe your other hand on your clothes bc it is SWEATY.

“Normal enough?” Your brow raises as you watch her.

“Yeah. We have some odd characters here. You’re probably the most normal one here.” She lets out another soft chuckle, making you tremble a bit. Her voice is just so nice and deep and smooth.

“Oh, heh, right. Well, thanks I guess. This is an incredible opportunity. I can’t believe the princess of hell herself is running a rehabilitation program like this. And, truthfully, I’m just glad to finally have some friends.”

At this point, Vaggie being the smart girl she is can tell that you are nervous. What she doesn’t know is that she is the one making you nervous.

“C’mon, newbie. I’ll introduce you to everyone. But seriously…try to stay away from Nifty.”

“What, why?” You ask as you follow her to the bar.

Before either one of you can speak another word, little Nifty is climbing your body all the way to your face to get a better look at you.

You let out a surprised yelp as she bares her sharp teeth in a creepy smile, giggling manically.

“Oooooh, fresh meat. Hi! I’m Nifty, I clean.” And suddenly, Vaggie is peeling the little demon off you.

You sigh in relief but your breath gets caught in your throat when Vaggie puts an arm around your shoulder.

“Don’t worry. She’s harmless.” Her smile becomes a little softer and a bit sheepish. “For the most part.”

This pulls a soft laugh from both of you and now you’re truly starting to relax.

You spend the night talking with everyone but Vaggie. She’s not much of a talker but OMFG SHE STAYS BESIDE YOU LIKE ALL NIGHT AND WRAPS HER ARM AROUND YOUR SHOULDERS FOR WHAT FEELS LIKE HOURS AND UR PRETTY SURE YOURE IN LOVE

Husk 🃏

Sorry but bro is not gonna introduce himself or even really wanna meet you. Poor guy doesn’t even want to be at the hotel at all so if he doesn’t have to interact with anyone, he won’t.

But he’s leaning his elbows on the bar counter as he watches Charlie go from person to person with you trailing behind her as she introduces you to the staff and residents.

Husk can’t help but scrunch his face and huff in annoyance as he watches the two of you finally approach him.

“Thissss is our lovely bartender, Husk! Husk, this is (Y/N), our newest resident. Isn’t that so exciting!?”

You shoot him a shy smile before waving your hand at him. “Hi. Nice to meet you.”

Husk eyes you for a second, not returning the smile as he sits up a bit. “Pleasure…” He mumbles in response before taking another swig from the whiskey bottle in his hand.

Husk watches you sitting at the bar for a while after this, just seeing how you interact with everyone and listening to your stories and watching the way your face looks as you laugh or how you seem to get really focused when listening to another person talk or how you keep looking over at him and giving him a small smile.

Finally, you clear your throat before you speak up. “Uh Husk?” He moves his eyes your way but stays still. “Could I get a drink?”

“What do ya want?”

“Surprise me! Or Whatever is easiest.”

And at that, he pours you a straight shot of whiskey in a glass.

You give him a look before picking up the glass. “Oh, uh, thanks.”

“Hey, you said easiest, not tastiest.” He watches you with a raised brow and when your eyes finally meet his gaze, his face seems to soften a bit at the sweet smile you’re wearing.

“Oh I get it! I don’t think I’d have the patience to be a bartender, especially one in hell. So, thanks.” Your smile remains.

“Why are you so fucking cheery and nice? You messing with me or something?” He watches you with a dumbfounded look on his face then glances over at Alastor before looking back to you with a frown.

Hes genuinely confused tho…like how did a kind hearted little thing like you end up in hell? And why are you being so nice to the drunk, smart ass bartender???

“Oh, I-I….um I don’t know. I’m sorry.” Your smile is gone now but you can see on his face that Husk regrets what he just said.

“Oh, don’t worry ‘bout him, sweetheart! He’s grumpy like this all the time.” Angel chimes in, making Husk roll his eyes.

“It’s okay. I’ll uh…give you some space.” You stand and remove yourself from the bar but before you can get far, Husk’s voice calls out to you.

“Come back…Sit down, kid.” And as you turn to return to your seat at the bar, you hear ice being put in a glass.

“I’ll make you some sweet, fruity crap. Seems like something you’d like.”

He whips up your drink rather fast and slides it over to you, a slight smile tugging at his lips as he watches you take a sip.

You take a drink, about to compliment the tasty beverage but then a loud bang sounds from behind you and everyone goes running off, yelling “NIFTY!!! NIFTY, NOOOO!”

You flinch first then turn and watch with wide eyes as a deep chuckle comes from Husk. His laugh makes you turn your attention back to him.

“You’re living here now?” He asks and you nod in reply. “Better get used to that.” He points to where the loud noise just came from.

Finally, he’s got your smile back. He feels a little less guilty now.

“So…are you really always grumpy or…just having a bad day today…?” You ask before sipping your drink again.

Husk simply shrugs in reply.

“Well if you ever need anyone to talk to, I’ll be here. I’m at the very end of that hall there.” You point as a smile stretches on his face. “You can talk to me.”

“You stole my line.” His smile and this new teasing tone of voice make you laugh softly.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“Ya know, people always talk about their baggage with the bartender. No one ever asks the bartender if they need someone to talk to.”

“Well! There’s a first for everything, Husk.”

His face contorts a bit as a blush slowly grows across his nose. Not only were you being disgustingly sweet to him but the way his name sounds coming from your mouth…oof he is feeling some feelings for you rn

“Thanks for the drink. Do I…owe you anything?” You stand but keep your eyes on him, noticing his ears are now pinned back against his head as if he’s scared or shy.

He’s not sure if he’s just really drunk or if you’re just really cute or both??? But he suddenly forgets where he is and what’s going on so all he can do is shake his head ‘no’.

“Oh, okay. Sweet! I’ll see you around then. Goodnight, Husk.”

As you walk towards your room, waving to the other staff members and whispering ‘goodnight’s to them all, Husk is staring so hard omfg

Angel saunters up to the bar, nearly laying across it as he pokes Husk on his blushy nose. Angel snickers when he notices Husk firmly gripping the bottle of whiskey in his claw, his dark eyes watching intently as you walk down the hall until you’re completely out of sight.

Once he can’t see you anymore, his attention finally shifts to the spider demon.

“Ooooh, aawwww! Does the little kitten have a crush on the newbie~?” Angel teases, smiling wider which causes Husk to groan and try to push Angel away.

Angel Dust 🕸️

IMMEDIATELY FLIRTS 🚨🚨🚨

Pickup lines and lingering touches right off the bat. You know baby boy is NOT afraid to make his feelings known.

No one introduces Angel Dust to anyone besides himself 😘

“Hey, sweet pea. I think ya in the wrong place cuz you look like an angel. What’s your name?”

“Heya, cutie pie. Who are ya and what did I do right to get ya here?”

“Well hello there! I didn’t know we’d be having guests~” Spoken as he adjusts his chest fluff all seductively and gives you a wink.

Whether you happily accept his advances or not, he will continue to flirt and give you way too much attention unless you specifically tell him to stop or that it’s making you uncomfortable.

In that case, he’ll chill out on the flirty words but you’ll have to fight him if you want him to stop being handsy. I mean, he has six arms! Just let him put at least one arm on or around you.

Follows you and Charlie around the hotel on your first day, chatting your ear off about everything and anything.

Charlie lowkey gets irritated a few times bc she’s trying to show you around and tell you all about her hotel but Angel just keeps complimenting you and telling you about his line of work in hopes that it’ll tell him more about who you are as a person.

And it’s extremely distracting, in a good way for you but a bad way for poor Charlie :(

“Soooooo? What do ya think, babe? Are we gonna be roomies or what?”

Regardless of your height, I’m sure Angel is much taller and probably rests his arm (or multiple arms) on your head or shoulder as he waits for your response.

“Angel! I wasn’t even done with my tour!” Charlie pouts and now she is also eagerly awaiting your response looking at you like this 😥

“Yeah! Sure. Why not?” You finally say, now trying to look up at the spider demon.

“Alright! Yeah!” He cheers before turning to Charlie with puppy dog eyes.

“Please put (Y/N) in the room next to mine?”

His plea to the princess forces a goofy grin to your lips, making you beam with pride. He wanted to be your neighbor? Cuuttteee~

But you had to question his motives and his true feelings.

All day, he’s flirted and shown his interest in you non stop but you’ve caught him flirting with others around the hotel too so you’re not entirely sure if he’s just really really nice and accepting and wanting to give you a warm welcome or…if he’s actually into you

Cuz you’re sure as hell into him ❤️‍🔥

“Yes, of course!” Charlie replies and suddenly Angel has one of your wrists, Charlie has the other and they’re practically running to your room, both giggling like kids on Christmas morning.

Charlie opens your door to show you the room and Angel enters first then flops down on your bed before you can even get through the doorway.

“Oooh your bed is so comfy. Maybe we can have a sleep over sometime, baby~” He wiggled his brows at you, making you turn beet red all the way down your neck.

“O-oh! Sure, sure. That actually sounds really fun. Heh..thanks for making me feel so welcome, Angel.”

And Angel just about loses it…

You’re so cute and innocent, like you just let him talk all lowkey naughty to you and now he’s watching in adoration at the way you look down at the ground and you can’t control your smile

He totally knows you’re crushing on him. He can sense that shit.

You’re not sure of Angel’s true feelings but he’s so sure of yours

When Angel flirts and throws himself at others in hell, half of them look at him like 😒 “ew bye” (sort of like Husk) and the other half are like 😍 “AWOOGA!!! Me, you, Pound town, right now.”

But you are different…you seem so pure and nice. You shy away from his touch at first before slowly melting into him and his comments obviously make you happy and giddy and he thinks you’re just too cute.

He’s definitely gonna take you up on your agreement to actually have a sleep over.

Starts out innocent with you guys having some drinks and maybe some snacks, maybe watching a movie or listening to music

But if you’re down to take it further, just say the word and Angel will happily kiss you until you can’t breath or even rip your clothes off and ravish you 😉

Alastor 🩸

He’s also the type to introduce himself once you finally run into him.

He’s a very busy man after all, you might even be at the hotel for a day or two before you actually meet him.

“My my! Charlie, you didn’t tell me we had a new resident. Hello, darling! Pleased to meet you. Call me Alastor.” He tips his head to you but keeps his large hands fixed on his cane.

“Oh hi! Nice to meet you too. Uhm…aren’t you…the radio demon?” You ask, equally afraid of him and intrigued by him.

“Why yes, yes I am. You must have heard my show then, yes? What do you think?” He leans forward, invading your personal space a bit with a prideful look in his deep red eyes.

He was testing you in this moment, wondering how you’d respond.

“Oh yes! Well, some of it. But I like it and I’d love to hear more.”

His permanent smile stretched just a bit wider at your response, eyes softening a bit.

“You’re awfully kind, (Y/N). What did a sweet little dove like you do to end up down here, hm?”

“Wait. How did you know-“

“Oh I know your name.” He interrupts, his expression and tone becoming just a bit more ominous but it didn’t scare you much.

“Oh wow, okay.” You watch his expression change before speaking. “I’m not even sure what I did to deserve this. I don’t remember much from my life, it’s all kind of a blur.”

Suddenly, his hand is on your back and he’s gently pushing you the way he wants you to go.

“Did Charlie give you a tour yet?” “Yeah, she did-“ “Oh, who cares! I say we go for another!” This was Alastor’s way of getting you alone to examine you a little closer.

The taller man walked you from room to room and down different hallways, not speaking much but waiting for your voice to shine through instead.

“Uhm c-can I ask you something?” You mumble out shyly, somewhat afraid of how he might respond.

He hums in response, hands behind his back as he continues his slow pace down the hall.

“Do you…always smile? And if you do always smile…why?”

And now he’s looking at you with much more intense eyes, his curved up lips twitching ever so slightly.

“You’re awfully bold, my dear. Most sinners run the opposite way when they see me on the street, but you…well I’ve got you all alone, in an unfamiliar space and you’re asking me such intrusive questions? Hmm…interesting.”

He had stopped walking, causing you to freeze in your spot as well.

Uh oh…was he mad?

“Oh! I-I’m so sorry. You just s-seem so nice and-and friendly. I like your smile. I’m just curious I guess. Sorry again. Forget I said anything!”

Your expression shifted to one of slight worry and concern as Alastor continued to stare you down with his terrifying radio dial pupils.

As apathetic and evil as his expression looked rn, his tiny cold heart stuttered a bit at your words.

Of all the ppl in hell, you thought he was nice?

Part of him was thinking “what the hell is wrong with this one? Why are they so naive?” But the other part of him was like “I NEED TO SIT THIS ONE DOWN AND LEARN MORE, HMM, VERY INTERESTING.”

And you try to keep walking bc now you’re just a tiny bit afraid of what he might say next.

You can’t even take two steps before his hand is gently but firmly latched to your wrist.

“No need to apologize at all! I find your curiosity very amusing. After all, you’re new here.” He gently pats your head, smiling bigger at you as his eyes squint.

You suddenly realize when his eyes squint closed and get wrinkled at the corners, he was genuinely smiling, not just being forced to uphold his smile.

“So…why do you smile all the time?” You ask again, voice barely above a whisper as the radio demon keeps his hand on your wrist.

“Well, You’re never fully dressed without one!”

He lets you go before using his mic cane to gently tap you on the head.

“I’m so very intrigued by you, (Y/N). I can’t say I’ve ever had the pleasure of meeting someone quite like you, especially down here in hell. Well, let me know if you need anything from your gracious hotelier.”

He slowly turns and walks off, his back to you as you yell out in response.

“Thank you, Alastor!”

And then he starts walking a little faster bc your voice is making his head spin a bit.

He’s not used to these feelings.

Well he’s not used to feelings of any kind anymore. It’s been way too long since someone has been so open and receptive to him. Like he said, most ppl run the other way but for whatever you reason, you ran straight at him and he didn’t understand why.

But it made him somewhat excited to get to know you more.

[wxnheart]

𝐊𝐢𝐬𝐬 𝐌𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐏𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐞, 𝐂𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐨𝐟 𝐃𝐮𝐭𝐲 𝐄𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧

note: the idea for this came up out of the blue and I was encouraged to write it so here you go. the premise is simple: what picture of your significant other do you have as your lock screen? as always, I hope y'all enjoy it! And now we have the sequel!

Captain John Price - About as sickeningly sweet vanilla as you can get. Your lock screen is a picture of him geared up, signature hat on, holding a lit cigar, and smiling at the camera like he won the lottery. You always told him his smile was radiant. Seeing him smile makes your day.

Gaz - Your lock screen is a picture of him hard at work. He's reading something and boy, is he concentrating hard. He doesn't believe you when you tell him that he scrunches his nose up while he's thinking. Well, now you have proof.

Soap - You swoon every time your phone lights up. It's a photo of him flexing one arm, smiling, and winking into the camera. You managed to get him after he finished working out and getting those gains. You also may or may not have jumped his bones right after taking said pic. Gah, you fucking love this man...

Ghost - LMAO. So you were trying to be discreet about it (emphasis on the word trying) and capture Ghost just standing there, gun in his hands, minding his business. Menacingly. Motherfucker got your ass because just as soon as you pressed the button, he looked right at you. So now you have a picture of Ghost standing there, gun in hand, minding his business and glaring staring at you. Menacingly. Reactions to your lock screen are either "Holy shit, who the FUCK is that?" or "Wow, he looks cool." You can only sigh adoringly every time you see it. That's Babygurl for you.

Alejandro Thee Stallion - You have a picture of him running a hand through his hair with his eyes closed. No, it isn't intentional; he was actually scratching his head. BUT, it was just the perfect moment and hell yeah, you rejoiced when you got it! He looks modelesque and orgasmic in it. You showed it to Rudy and now Alejandro is wondering why Rudy looks like he wants to laugh every time he sees him.

Rudy - It's actually a picture of you and him together being all cute and shit. And that actually wasn't your first choice. It was originally a picture of him knocked the hell out, bundled up in his favorite blanket, and having the best nap of his life. He looks so boyishly cute when he sleeps. Rudy actually had to put on the puppy dog eyes so you wouldn't make that your lock screen because he's had that blanket as long as he's known Alejandro (who has also seen said blanket) and apparently there's a betting pool going around in Los Vaqueros around the fact that Rudy has yet to get rid of it. It's a long story.

König - You actually have a picture of him sitting down against a wall, arms on his knees looking cool as a cucumber. He's really just chillin', taking in the atmosphere, and staring into space. Looks badass doing it, too. His eyes are pretty entrancing and the picture really puts into perspective how tall König is because he absolutely does not look it when he's sitting down. You also realized that he likes to make himself comfortable in confined spaces. Huh. Wonder if he's aware of that, too. He caught a glimpse of your lock screen by accident and whether you know it or not, he's flattered that he's the first thing you see when you look at your phone.

Phillip Graves - You got a picture of him doing his best Zoolander impression (Blue Steel, y'all) because you forgot to turn the flash off. Whoops. Don't you dare show that to the rest of Shadow Company. Spoiler Alert: You... kinda-sorta-really do. Whoops.

Valeria Garza - One word. Badass. She looks like a fucking badass on your lock screen. Those toned arms and tattoos are out for the world to see. Windswept tresses. And she's smirking at you, too? Oh, baby! You're falling in love all over again.

[phantom-of-the-501st]

Thoughts on the Batch's Ending

Ooookay. This is going to be a long one. (Little note from Steph who just finished writing this: it’s nearly 3000 words…)

Tagging @saturn-sends-hugs @inkstainedhandswithrings and @eriexplosion because I value their thoughts (but I'm also not demanding that you read 3000 words of waffle)

I’ve had a lot of thoughts about the finale of The Bad Batch and honestly, my mind is a bit of a mess right now. One of the things I just want to try and tackle is how I feel about the ending of each Batch member individually, because while I can look at it and say “The Batch got a happy ending!”, I feel like that doesn’t really give me much of an idea of whether or not each character got an ending that I feel is fitting for their story arc.

So, this post is basically just going to be me unpicking the ending for each of the Batchers and working out how I feel about it (aka me trying to unscramble the mass load of thoughts going on in my head right now). 

Omega

Overall, I’m very happy with where Omega ended up. When you look back on how she was when we first met her, you realise just how much she has grown over the last few seasons. She didn’t just learn to be a part of the squad, she also learned how to look after herself. It isn’t just a development of her skillset, it’s also a growth in maturity, which allows her to have a clearer head and more rational decisions in the field. While Omega trusted her brothers to come and rescue her, she didn’t just sit around and wait for them, she hatched her own plan to not only get her and the other children out, but also help the Batch when they arrive at Tantiss.

Like Echo, she strongly believes in helping people and I love that that has carried through into her ending. While it would have been nice for her to live a quiet life, free of any more troubles, it makes complete sense for her to want to join the Rebellion. And I think it was at a good time as well. Omega got to spend the rest of her childhood being raised in a more peaceful, safe environment, before making the decision a few years down the line to go her own way. This is her leaving the nest and I think it was tackled incredibly well. You can see how she has taken on attributes from all of her brothers, and judging by her style choice, Phee as well. We see Omega using the support of her brothers to carve her own path and I love that.

Personally, I can’t really see a more fitting development in her story than this. And I’m reluctant to actually call it an ending because for her, this feels more like the beginning of a new chapter. I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if we saw her again later down the road.

Hunter

Now those who follow me may be aware that Hunter was never my favourite member of the Batch. I didn’t dislike him, but I never really connected with him in the same way that I connected with all of the other characters. Saying that, it doesn’t mean I haven’t given a lot of thought to him and his character.

Hunter always had a lot on his shoulders. He was the leader of the Batch and that meant keeping a rag-tag group of defective clones in line, but it also left him with the belief that if anything were to happen to his squad, it would be his responsibility. So, with Crosshair and Omega stuck with the Empire, and Tech dead, Hunter had a lot to carry. At the beginning of Season 3 we saw that he had become more reckless and irrational, not really thinking about plans and wanting to jump straight into things. It was Wrecker who had to step in and make sure Hunter didn’t do anything stupid. Hunter felt like he lost control and that took a lot out of him, especially since this is something I think he could feel creeping up on him throughout Season 2, even if he tried to fight it. The Batch had started to make decisions without him, and Omega was forming close attachments to other people, which was digging a knife into Hunter’s fear of losing his squad. So S3 saw him trying everything he could to reunite the Batch, because he couldn’t bear to lose anyone else.

And he achieved that. But what I also deeply appreciate is that we see Hunter accepting that Omega wants to go her own way. This was something he didn’t want happening for a long time, but once he accepted that she was capable of looking after herself, and once he accepted that he could never keep her tied in place forever, he supported Omega in her decision to join the Rebellion. Yes, he will always worry about her. He even tells her that she will always be their kid. But he knows that it’s time for her to carve her own path, and that means for him, finally letting go and accepting that Clone Force 99 will never be what it once was. 

Wrecker

Wrecker is an interesting one for me because he’s one of the few characters where I can’t really see a big step for his character in the final episode. For many of the others there is some form of acceptance, or big step in their lives, but for Wrecker I don’t really see that. And unfortunately, I think that comes from Wrecker never really being the focus of any strong character development throughout the history of the show. That’s not to say there wasn’t any growth at all, but when we look at how far everyone else has come in their stories, Wrecker always feels like he never got the same treatment in this show. The biggest growth I saw was when he stepped in to help Hunter when he could see the sergeant was spiralling.

So, while I’m happy he lived and has gone on to enjoy a longer, more peaceful life than we ever expected for the Batch, it makes me sad that we never really saw anything big for Wrecker in this ending. No big acceptance, no huge sacrifice. We don’t even get to see him say goodbye to Omega when she leaves. I love that Wrecker got a happy ending, but I always wish that we had gotten the opportunity to see more of a character arc with him over the course of the entire show.

Crosshair

I accepted a while ago that if any of the Batch members were to survive, Crosshair would be one of them because I didn’t expect the writers to kill him off after everything that he had been through. And thankfully they didn’t! I love that after everything, Crosshair has managed to find peace. Maybe not completely, but enough that he has the chance to live a life that doesn’t involve him being a soldier. 

Throughout S2 and S3 we saw Crosshair come to terms with the fact that he was disposable to the Empire and that they didn’t care about him as much as he had made himself believe. And one of the things Crosshair fought with the most was his own identity as a soldier. For so long, he believed that that was all he was, all he could be, so that’s why it has been so amazing finally seeing Crosshair acknowledge that he doesn’t need to be a soldier to still live a life he deserves; his purpose is and always has been more than that.

Saying that, I want to address the hand thing because I am still unsure of where I sit with it. Following his escape from Tantiss, we see Crosshair has developed hand tremors as a result of his PTSD, and a decent chunk of the season has been dedicated to him learning how to live with them. The biggest reason for this affecting Crosshair so much was that it impacted his ability to be a sniper, which is what Crosshair believed to be his main purpose: he didn’t know what to do without the ability to use his hand. And we were given some incredibly sweet scenes between him and Omega as she helped him work out the best way to manage the tremors, for example, them meditating together.

But then that brings me onto my main issue, which is, why remove the hand? One of the reasons I keep seeing is that it removes Crosshair’s ability to be a sniper, but we had already seen that. That’s the issue that the tremors were causing. Crosshair had already been struggling with that ability as a result of what happened to him on Tantiss, so cutting his hand off as a way of preventing his sniping ability seems a bit unnecessary. Now admittedly, the soldier who cut his hand off didn’t know that he had hand tremors, so logistically it makes sense, but as a story tool it seems a bit bizarre to me. Personally, I think it would’ve been more interesting to pursue the idea of Crosshair learning to manage his tremors through meditation etc. and adapting to a life that has less of a focus on sniping. 

Another reason I have seen for the hand is that it symbolises Crosshair finally becoming free from the Empire and what they did to him on Tantiss. Him no longer having the tremors indicates that he is no longer burdened by the Empire and his time there. But that doesn’t really work for me either. For one, Crosshair will never truly be separated from what happened to him there; even if he lost the shaking, he would still have a number of psychological issues as a result of what he went though, so I can’t see it as a way of symbolising a true separation. Which is once again why I think that following the story beat of him managing the tremors would have been a more interesting path for them to go down with his character.

Saying that, I’m still happy with where Crosshair’s story went. He is arguably the most complex character in the Batch and I’m so glad we have been able to see him develop the way he has. Him living a long, quiet life is something that I’m happy he has gotten, and I truly don’t think that him dying would have brought nearly as satisfying a conclusion as Crosshair finally finding a new place in the world.

Tech

Oh boy… this is going to be an interesting chunk of this essay. So errm… it turns out Tech is actually dead, which is… kinda shit. 

Back when we saw him fall at the end of S2, I said that one of the reasons that I didn��t believe that Tech was really dead was because if he was, I would’ve found the writing kinda cheap. I said repeatedly throughout that season that I didn’t want all of his character development to simply be an emotional manipulation tactic to make us even more sad when he died… which is what it turned out to be. It doesn’t surprise me that Tech sacrificed himself, but it makes me mad that ultimately his death never really had any real impact on anything. I mean, they hardly even addressed it in the final season!

I get that animated Star Wars is known for rarely addressing characters after their deaths, but The Clone Wars focuses on so many characters that if we gave that much attention to every character that died, then we would never progress the plot. However, unlike TCW, The Bad Batch primarily focuses on a smaller group of clones and therefore not only has the space to explore the impacts that death would have on the squad, but really should find it a necessary part of the storytelling. The lack of attention given to Tech throughout this season has been beyond frustrating to me. He deserved better.

And I can’t write a section about Tech’s ending without addressing the CX-2 situation. Were we all delusional for believing that Tech was alive? No. Now before people come at me for saying that, I want to explain why that is the conclusion I have come to. You would have every right to label us delusional if there was absolutely no proof behind the claims that we made, but when the writers give us a character that both speaks and acts like Tech, what did they expect us to think? There were too many parallels between Tech and CX-2 for it to be coincidental and I still stand by the fact that we had reason to believe that they were the same person.

Now, looking at the other CX soldiers we see in the finale, they all seem to parallel the OG members of the Batch: there’s a larger one who primarily focuses on hand-to-hand combat, someone who favours blades, a sniper, and a more tech-savvy one. And I’m sure there is a reason for that, symbolically or practically, but if the fact that they all resemble the Batch is important, then why was so much focus put primarily on CX-2? There was no way we weren’t going to think that they would reveal him to be Tech.

Overall, I’m annoyed. Tech was such a brilliant character and I am so frustrated that not only did he get a death that I felt was kind of cheap, but he didn’t get nearly the respect he should have been given in the final season. Now, I’m not using this as a way to bash the writers, and I definitely don’t think that anyone should use it as an excuse to be bullies, but unfortunately, I can’t be satisfied with the way Tech’s story ended, and I’m not sure I ever will.

Echo

Last but certainly not least, Echo. To say that Echo means a lot to me is an understatement, and I was genuinely terrified that I might have to say goodbye to one of my comfort characters. But thankfully, our boy made it!

Following Season 1, we all wanted for Echo to get some more development. It never felt like he had truly been used to his full potential. And thankfully, Season 2 began to give us that. Yes, we ended up saying goodbye to Echo for half a season, but we saw some incredible growth in his character, and him choosing to join the rebellion made too much sense not to happen. Unfortunately, this also meant that we didn’t get to see Echo for the majority of the final season, but I am beyond grateful that what they gave us in these last few episodes has been some of the best Echo content that we have ever seen. Watching him grow and find where he belongs has been a pleasure to watch, He really is an ARC trooper through and through. Particularly in these last few episodes, seeing how much he has grown to be like Fives, and watching him carry on his brother’s legacy, has been so incredible, No matter what anyone says, I believe that he truly is one of the greatest, and most important characters that we’ve ever gotten out of animated Star Wars.

However, I do have one gripe with Echo’s ending, and it’s the fact that it doesn’t actually feel like a conclusion. If anything, I have more questions about Echo now than I did before the last episode. Echo going to the Rebellion is an absolute given; he still has stuff to help Rex with. But the fact that there is absolutely no mention of him in the epilogue has just made me wonder where he is. Omega mentions Crosshair and Wrecker, and we only see Hunter, so we know that Echo isn’t with them. But we also know that at that point in the story, Echo also isn’t with Rex (assuming we’re in Rebels era). So where is he? What is he doing? Is he actually dead at that point??? I really hope we see more of Echo in the future because if this really is the last time we see his character, it’s too open ended for me to really be satisfied with it.

But if I’m being honest, I really don’t think that this is the last time that we are going to see him. And especially with Omega joining the Rebellion, I wouldn’t be surprised if we saw another clone-centric show following these characters in the future.

Concluding Thoughts

All in all, my thoughts are still a bit jumbled. I still don’t know how I truly feel about everything, but hopefully this post at least gives some insight into how I think each character’s endings were handled. Will I change my mind at some point? Probably. But for now, this is where I stand.

At its core, I think the ending we got makes sense for a lot of the characters, and I’m glad that they didn’t all just die at the end. Sure, there are choices that I’m not happy with, but seeing that some of the Batch go on to live long lives is something that I’m very happy to see. It doesn’t happen enough in animated SW, so I’m glad we got to experience it.

[midnightcinderella]

My favs when their s/o gets love potioned

Inspired by this post! In case the link is broken, I’ve reblogged it so it’ll be right below this post on my blog!

3/18/23: Did some editing, added some things to hopefully flesh things out a bit and make it easier to understand

Characters (word count): Trey (800), Leona (700), Silver (600)

Summary: Basically a love potion explodes in your face during class and the first person you lay eyes on after that is not your boyfriend, though that’s of no concern to the potion. Neither he nor the new object of your affections is too jazzed about it

Notes: no gendered pronouns for reader, some jealousy based fluff

Trey Clover

Of course. Of course it had to be someone from his own dorm you saw after the potion incident

Originally he’d been planning to keep an eye on you anyway, but now it seemed he didn’t have a choice. You kept a vice grip on Cater’s arm, preventing him from fleeing the Heartslabyul kitchen

“Are you hungry, honey? I know you don’t like sweets so how about I make us some sandwiches?”

Rip his heart out, why don’t you?

He just barely suppressed the grief from showing on his face upon hearing the pet name meant for him used on Cater

When Trey turned to meet Cater’s gaze, all he could do was shoot him a sheepish grin, wiggling his arm in your grip in hopes that Trey would see that he was being held captive

Whether it was because you noticed that he wanted to be let go or because you needed both hands to make sandwiches was unknown to either of them, but you let Cater go anyway

Cater moved to leave but you called him back, saying you were almost done

At Cater’s excuse that he was busy and had plans, you replied that you chose that time to hang out with him because you knew he would be free

The boys were unsure whether they were impressed with your planning or concerned that you managed to learn Cater’s schedule in such a short time

Sandwiches made and grin on your face, you dragged Cater to eat outside with you in the warm sunshine, leaving your poor boyfriend behind to quietly bake for the dorm’s next tea party :(

His phone dinged while he was busy waiting for the pastries to bake and feeling sorry for himself. It was a Magicam notification

You’d just posted two pictures captioned “#TogetherForever”

The first was a tasteful shot of the sandwiches you’d made and the second was a selfie of you and Cater, pressed cheek to cheek with matching grins on your faces

Trey sighed. Cater never could resist a good photo op

In the garden, you were scrolling through your phone. “Look, Cater! We’ve already got so many comments!”

“You posted it?” he asked in disbelief. Trey was going to kill him. Or worse, mess with his meals

“Yeah!” you laughed, not noticing the disparity between your moods as you read through the comments

They were all confused. When had you and Trey broken up, they asked.

What?

As you stared at the comments, wondering why they all mentioned Trey, the fog blocking a part of your brain began to clear

You were dating Trey, not Cater

You called Cater honey. Right in front of Trey

Oh shit

Without a word, you jumped to your feet and rushed toward the kitchen where you hoped your beloved still was

You only made it a few steps, however, before turning on your heel and coming back to snag your uneaten sandwich

You’d just finished the last bite when you reached the kitchen and sighed in relief when you saw that Trey was still there

He was scrolling through his phone, only noticing you when you got close

Given no time to process what was happening, Trey let out a grunt as you barrelled into him, squishing his arms to his sides as you hugged him tight

“Trey! Honey, I’m so sorry!” You were hiding your face in his shoulder, unable to see his face as you babbled one apology after another

In the middle of you swearing up and down that whatever you did with Cater wasn’t real, he wiggled one arm out of your grasp and held up a hand to stop you

Your blood ran cold at the feeling of him breaking away from you and you were almost afraid to look at him

Trey called your name softly and you finally met his eyes, terrified of what you might find. What if he was really upset?

Though you found no anger in his expression, you were still uneasy, not knowing what he was feeling

“I get a get out of jail free card for this,” was all he said. You nodded readily, pursing your lips. “Then all is forgiven.”

You planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek and held him tighter, wailing about how you’d never leave his side again

He didn’t even need to ask you to take down the pictures you took with Cater; you did it as soon as you let him go

The very next day, you posted a picture of a honey cake captioned, “With all my love to my sweet baker <3″

The comments were once again flooded with confused people, wondering if you’d thought the previous day was April Fool’s day or something

Leona Kingscholar

How weird that you were seeing Leona everywhere today, you thought

Unable to take your attention off of Jack for more than a moment, you didn’t notice that it was no coincidence

You also didn’t notice how Leona’s jaw clenched or how his tongue clicked whenever you had any interaction with Jack

What you did notice, however, was the way Jack would glance nervously behind you every so often

You’d turned to look once or twice but never saw anyone looking to do either of you harm. It was just Leona and neither of you had done anything to piss him off

“Come to the Mystery Shop with me, Jackie!” you said, pulling him along by the hand. You started off in the opposite direction of where Leona was leaning against a wall

“Wha- Can’t you shop on your own?” he asked. He glanced behind him to see Leona standing up straight once again to follow

“I could, but I really want you to come with me,” you said. “No one will mess with me if you’re there.”

“Do people mess with you often?” he asked. You nodded, not looking back

“Yeah. Some of them try to prank me, others try to flirt. It’s a headache every time.”

Jack hadn’t known about this. When he looked to Leona, it seemed the lion beastman was in the same boat

Jack had never been the best at identifying emotions, even less so when it came to inexpressive people, but Leona wore the most unreadable expression he’d seen yet

Finally, after a moment of Jack wondering if he should block or dodge, Leona nodded his chin forward, telling him to go with you

With Leona’s blessing, Jack kept your pace all the way to the shop

As you browsed the shelves, a voice in your head nagged at you that something was wrong

It wouldn’t stop and became unbearable to the point that you put the can of tuna back in its place and looked around you in all directions to prove to the voice that you were fine, there was no one in sight but you and Jack

See? You were perfectly safe. But still the voice wouldn’t shut up

It was relentless, screaming at you that you were in an unnatural situation, that you didn’t belong here. You couldn’t even focus on reading the product labels anymore

Instead you told Jack that you could shop another time and that you wanted to hang out by Savanaclaw’s pool for a bit

Which is how Jack found himself lying right beside the pool with you cuddling up to him

The sound of the water gently lapping at the edge of the pool was his only solace as he watched Leona pretend to nap nearby on a lounge chair

You laid you head on Jack’s arm, accepting that you would just have to be content with what you were given

You tapped your finger gently on his vest, right where you’d originally wanted to rest your head

He’d denied you when you asked and you gave him your best puppy dog eyes, hoping to change his mind

Unfortunately for Jack, he couldn’t tell the difference between puppy dog eyes and the look of someone about to cry

Worried that you were going to start the waterworks at any time, he offered you his arm instead

You stopped your tapping and laid your hand flat on his chest

“Jackie,” you said softly. He turned to look at you gazing at him sweetly as you laughed. “Your heart is beating so fast.”

A moment later, your world turned on its axis as a pair of arms hooked under you and hauled you into the air

Spluttering in surprise, you looked to Jack just in time to see Leona plant his boot on his hip

With no deliberation, he pushed Jack right into the pool

“Leo! What do you think you’re doing?!” And suddenly you stopped. Why had you called him Leo? And why wasn’t he annoyed by the new nickname?

One by one, the memories returned to you. Leo wasn’t a new nickname. You’d been calling him that since you started dating

“Leo,” you said again, this time looking at him as if you’d met him for the first time in years

“Welcome back, bunny,” he said, and you could feel his voice rumble through his chest. “We’ve got some naps to catch up on.”

Silver

This wasn’t funny. This wasn’t funny At All

Of all the people you could have seen after the potion exploded in your face, it had to be his father?

Well, he supposed it could have been worse. If it had to be any other Diasomnia student, he guessed he was glad it was Lilia

If it had been Sebek, he’d fear that his brusque mannerisms might hurt your feelings

And if it had been Malleus.... Sebek would be even more likely to hurt your feelings, he thought

Still, he couldn’t say it was pleasant watching his love fawn over his father the way you were doing

He was able to convince Malleus to spend more time with Lilia today so that he could keep an eye on you, much to Sebek’s outrage

“Silver! How dare you try to order our lord around just to selfishly spend time with your partner!”

Malleus only laughed and told Sebek to settle down, that Silver was only worried about you since you were affected by a potion

Though, if he were to be even more honest, he’d admit that was worried about you as well. Humans weren’t so hardy as fae and he wasn’t sure what exactly was in the potion

So now the three of them sat in the lounge watching as you giggled at all the attention Lilia was showering upon you, each with different feelings on the situation: annoyance, amusement, and disgust

Lilia chuckled, gently patting your head as you twirled the flower he’d given you between your fingers

It was plucked from one of the vases in the lounge, but it was the thought that counted, right?

You couldn’t seem to see that the affection he was giving you was the same that he’d given Silver when he was a young boy

Or perhaps you didn’t want to see it, just pleased to have him smiling at you and giving you gifts

Still, all daydreams must come to an end. Yours did when, with a lighthearted laugh, Lilia told you that you reminded him of a little boy he used to take care of

Little? You were here thinking he was flirting back while he saw it as babysitting?

Ouch

Suddenly feeling very embarrassed, you put the flower into the nearest vase and gave Lilia a flimsy excuse about homework as you readied to leave

Happening to catch Silver’s gaze on your way out, you made your way over to him, ready to tell him what had just happened

“You don’t see me as a little kid, right? You take me seriously?”

Silver, patient as he’d always been, assured you that you were not childlike (at least not to the point that anyone would treat you like a child) and that everyone took you and your feelings seriously

“He was just teasing you,” he said, smoothing down your hair

Just as you were about to ask once again if he was sure, you raised your head to see him smiling at you

This smile was one reserved for you and you alone

But how did you know that?

And why was your first thought when you saw him to go to him for comfort? How had you known he would comfort you?

And why was he doing it so gently?

Without you even knowing that your expression had changed, Silver patted your head again

“It’s ok,” he said, and you knew he wasn’t just talking about the way Lilia teased you

He’d watched over you

He’d comforted you when you got upset over something silly

He’d forgiven you before you could even apologize

“Silver,” you said, lip wobbling

Rather than say anything else, he simply pulled you into his arms, his muscles relaxing at having you right where you belonged

You nuzzled into his shoulder and if he felt the tears soaking into his jacket, he didn’t mention them

[jenseclaren]

Jenson and Sebastian are getting married and Nico helps with planning but the happy couple is scheming behind Nico’s back

The kitchen table in Jenson and Sebastian's apartment was filled with wedding stuff. Examples for invitations, samples for cakes, pictures of flowers. Ever since Jenson proposed and Sebastian decided that he didn't want to wait long before getting married, the table had been in that state.

Nico was sitting on top of the counter with a glass of white wine in his hand. He was already done with the undecidedness of the couple. He was beginning to regret his decision to help them with planning.

He assumed when Jenson asked him for help, he would only deal with best man stuff. What he had in mind was helping Jenson with an outfit or planning the bachelor party. He quickly realised he was there to make final decisions because both Sebastian and Jenson were impossible.

‘’We can’t have red roses at a pastel themed wedding!’’ Sebastian exclaimed, Nico chuckled into his wine. Jenson rolled his eyes, ‘’But they’re classic!’’ he resisted his fiance. Nico chuckled once again, finished his wine and jumped down from the counter.

‘’Seb is right.’’ Nico said, opening the fridge. He wasn’t even looking at the couple but he could paint a picture of Jenson’s face accurately. Offended but not enough to argue.

‘’Even Nico agrees with me and he never does!’’ Sebastian said dramatically to prove his point. Nico shrugged and joined them around the table with a new glass of wine.

‘’You’re supposed to be on my side!’’ Jenson screeched with a grin on his face, Seb started laughing and rested his head on his fiance’s shoulder. Nico shrugged again and pouted, ‘’I’m on nobody’s side, I’m neutral, like Switzerland.’’ he said.

‘’We need to move on from flowers anyway, invitation list is priority.’’ Nico continued, he didn’t wanna be this bossy when it was their wedding but he had no choice. Jenson and Seb’s understanding of wedding planning was strictly flirting, no planning.

‘’Also I got confirmation from the reception venue.’’ Nico added, his smile grew with the sight of the couple cheering and kissing each other in celebration. A fast wedding meant it was hard to get venues.

Sebastian pulled the list of people they could potentially invite but since they decided on a strictly close friends and family wedding, the list of names had to decrease drastically. Nico didn’t even realise how many people his friends knew since he felt like he knew everybody in their lives.

Jenson tilted his head so he could see the names, Nico was just sitting across them sipping his wine. He was examining the invitation card they had chosen, that one they actually needed none of Nico’s help, it was a clear decision.

Nico had gotten distracted and was not at all following the couple’s conversation on whether colleagues should be invited or not. Until he heard that name, Lewis. He flinched as the familiar name they had been avoiding for a year filled his ears again. He looked up, Seb and Jenson were staring at him. Only now noticing that they hadn’t avoided the name like they always did.

‘’He’s coming?’’ Nico asked, the couple looked at each other not knowing how to respond. ‘’Yeah.’’ Sebastian said, Nico knew Seb and Jenson were still in contact with Lewis. Sebastian and Lewis always had been close, they were even flatmates before Sebastian moved in with Jenson.

‘’For sure?’’ Nico asked, he didn’t even know what he wanted to hear. Lewis was his childhood best friend, his partner in crime for twenty years. Maybe he overreacted when he decided to move abroad but it hurt Nico so much he didn’t know what was an appropriate reaction.

He had never lived more than thirty minutes away from Lewis and now he was hours away. He didn’t even mean to cut contact after he moved away, it just happened. There was no bad blood, just haunting silence.

One last hug at the airport, few updates the first few weeks and then silence. Nico had made it about himself, Lewis seeking out an opportunity. He had tried to guilt Lewis, telling him he was leaving him alone. Both of them knew it wasn’t true. It was just that when the same person was by your side at all times, the sudden distance made him lonelier than he was.

Nico felt like Lewis moving meant that he was never as important to Lewis as Lewis was to him. It all was very unfortunate. How even though they tried to keep the connection like Lewis and Sebastian did, they were terrible at it. It didn’t feel the same, so they went silent.

What came next was Seb and Jenson stopping the updates they gave on Lewis to Nico. It was too painful for him, remembering what he lost. Then the name became a taboo, even shared memories and inside jokes disappeared.

While this was happening on Nico’s side, Jenson and Sebastian were trying to keep their friendship alive with both. The friend group impossible to separate had been separated. Nico knew this day would come, the day he would come back. It had been almost exactly a year since Lewis left, Nico no longer was angry at him for moving. He was just mourning the friendship he had. Nico missed Lewis, Jenson and Sebastian had been there when he was acting like he wasn’t hurting.

‘’Yeah, just talked to him this morning.’’ Sebastian clarified, Jenson was trying to read Nico but he had no expression sitting on his face. It was worrying because even though he was the kind of person to hide feelings, it had never been the case when it was about Lewis.

Nico nodded silently, ‘’Cool’’ he said and chugged the glass of wine sitting in front of him. He got out of his chair, without saying anything and went to the bathroom.

Seb immediately turned to Jenson. “Too strong feelings for a best friend.” he commented, Jenson nodded. It had always been an unspoken inside joke between the couple, how they thought Lewis and Nico would end up together.

“This is our chance.” Sebastian continued, Jenson raised his eyebrows. “A wedding is a perfect opportunity.” he further explained, Jenson tilted his head.

Jenson looked confused, “What?” he asked. Seb chuckled and put his one hand on his fiance’s shoulder.

“We’re gonna get them together.” Seb said, Jenson was more confused because whatever Sebastian was saying just didn’t go through his head.

“But they haven’t even talked in a year.” Jenson said, Seb smiled big. “Yes!” he cheered, Jenson didn’t understand what was so good about that statement.

“They’ve been both longing for each other for a year!” Seb said, Jenson for once felt like he was the wise one in the relationship.

“You know both, this can backfire easily.” Jenson said, Sebastian just nodded. “If we make sure that the wedding is not the first time they see each other, they will break the ice and the wedding can perform its magic.” Seb explained. Jenson wasn’t sold.

“I feel like we changed roles.” he said and Sebastian laughed. “Yeah a bit.” he smiled and gave Jenson a kiss on the cheek.

But you might have a point.” Jenson raised his eyebrows again, Sebastian smiled. “The bachelor parties, after a certain hour we can mesh them, almost all our friends are mutual anyway.” Sebastian said, Jenson nodded in agreement.

“That could work but Nico is planning my party, Kimi is planning yours.” Jenson reminded, Seb forgot about that detail and pouted.

“Then we will improvise on the day.” Sebastian said, Jenson nodded just because he didn’t have any counter agreements.

It was kind of funny how they were both so excited about getting married but the planning part was not fun for either of them. They just wanted to get on with it. Thank god Nico was a control freak that they could get away with it. He knew both of them enough to make the right decisions anyway.

“Will it be that simple?” Jenson asked, Seb shrugged, not knowing what to say. “We can hope so.” he said, Jenson pouted.

“Let’s hope so.” Jenson said right when Nico came back to the kitchen. “Hope what?” he asked, curious as always.

“Uhh.” Jenson panicked, Sebastian was quick to come to his rescue. “Kimi planning my bachelor party.” Seb said, Jenson left a suspicious kiss on his cheek as a thank you.

Nico wasn’t sold but he didn’t feel like digging in too deep. The conversation went back to the guest list, the topic of Lewis wasn’t brought back again.

Jenson and Sebastian were sure that their plan was going to work. It would be such a shame if all the love they had got wasted on miscommunication.

[two-reflections]

What is your take on the best reading order for Salamanders-stuff?

I starteed with the first half of the Heresy, jumped to Vulkan's Primarch-novel after Unremembered Empire, read the "let's bring him back"-arc of the Heresy, Read the 40k Omnibus, returned to the Heresy ... and that was NOT ideal!

So, what would you recommend? And, what aditional 40k-books besides the Omnibus do you think are esential?

TL;DR - I'm not the best person to ask because there's a lot I haven't read, but imo, if you're not invested in the Horus Heresy, go straight to Nick Kyme's series. Salamander Omnibus, or better, pick up the Lords of Nocturne set that includes Rebirth. (Coming out this Spring!) Alternatively, read Forge Master first and then go to Tome of Fire. If you are invested in the Horus Heresy already, maybe starting there is better, but again, I'm not the best person to ask about that.

Long answer below!

To be honest, I'm not sure I have a good answer for this because any time anyone discusses reading orders, I always think "Whatever order keeps you interested and reading is the best." 😅

Also, I know this is pretty much a crime, but I haven't finished the Salamander-focused Heresy-era books. I... Really struggle with the Heresy, tbh. I fell in love with 40k through a tabletop RPG set in the 41st millennium, and I still tend to think of the Heresy as a quasi-mythical thing that happened in the distant past. Currently, I use the Heresy-era books I have as reference material, but I recognize that not completing them leaves huge gaps in my knowledge. I plan to get through the Salamanders ones (and a few other 30k books, including Josh Reynolds’ ones!) this year.

I read the Tome of Fire series around 2019 and have gone back to various parts since, but I haven't fully reread it. I should do that. I've reread Rebirth a few times, including recently, because it hits juuust right for me. Also, I have a physical copy. 😅

I don't feel super qualified to answer because of all that, but I suppose my recommendation would depend on whether the reader jives with Nick Kyme's writing or not.

If they already like 40k and don't mind Nick Kyme's style, (like you and me, yay!) the available choices are either the 40k Salamanders books or the Horus Heresy. Unless a reader is already invested in the Heresy series, I'd say pick up the Lords of Nocturne collection that's coming out this April, as that will contain the whole of his Salamanders series, several short stories and Rebirth. (Finally! Maybe people will actually read my favourite Salamanders novel now.) Alternatively, the old Salamanders Omnibus has most of the same material, but without Rebirth.

After that, they have three choices: Dive into the Horus Heresy, go for David Annandale’s Primarch novel and/or his Space Marine Battles Book Forge Master, or follow me into the sad world of scrounging for snippets in codexes and White Dwarf. 😭

That being said, I honestly think the 8th Edition Codex: Salamanders is worth a look for readers, despite being game-focused. There are lots of fiction snippets in there. Would be fun to see fanfic authors expand some of them... FFG's Deathwatch RPG sourcebook also does a good job at setting the vibe, though it's older and a little out of date.

There are some solid short stories out there too. I love Burden of Angels, but the two by Graham NcNeill in Shattered Legions are pretty good. (Shattered Legions might be another good way in, hmm.) Artefacts was an interesting read, I really liked Vulkan's voice in it.

For people who struggle with Nick Kyme's style, reading David Annandale’s Vulkan: Lord of Drakes and/or Forge Master might be the best way in. Personally, I found Vulkan: Lord of Drakes a bit strange and didn't finish it, but although I've only just started Forge Master, I'm enjoying it so far. It's from the PoV of a techmarine and the first Chapter contains a description of Nihilan's forces besieging Heliosa. If someone read that book first and then moved onto the Tome of Fire, they might be a bit better primed to roll with the story. I think Overfiend also has a Salamander in it, but I haven't read that one yet. Also, Annandale’s debut The Death of Antagonis was Black Dragons-focused, but I haven't read that one either.

One more thing a reader could do is find media relevant to conflicts the Salamanders were involved in. For example, there isn't (as far as I'm aware) a Salamanders-focused novel set during the 3rd War for Armageddon. However, by reading about that conflict in general, a fan would come to understand a bit more of their favourite Chapter's history. (This is why I was asking for material related to the Talledus War recently!)

Sorry I couldn't give a better informed answer! Maybe I'll have a more fleshed out opinion later this year. 😊

[shiningwonderland]

Tokiya Ichinose (Repeat) Memorial

Translator: Koto (twitter: kotowari16)

Proofreader: Mimi (twitter: _mimisaurora)

Reason

Just why did this have to happen on a day like this…?

I had been keeping an eye on the clock ever since this morning, even while taking proper care to do the things that had to be done.

We have been working hard for this day.

Taking lesson after lesson, pushing each other to grow.

And yet…

Why, did I all of a sudden… and why today…?

No, it’s too early to give up now already.

Fortunately, our performance is the last one.

If I could push the time, perhaps…

“There’s no way but to do it, right?”

I put in some effort and finished without mistakes.

“Thanks for your hard work!”

When I finished and got through the greeting, I started running.

I might still make it if I leave now!

Please, let me still be in time.

With thoughts like a prayer, I jumped on board the train. 

One hour left until our performance.

If I took a taxi from the station closest to the academy, the probability isn’t zero. 

I don’t usually take the train, but this time is different.

I can’t read the exact time by car.

There was danger of things blowing up because Hayato is on the train, so I disguised myself with a hat, mask and sunglasses and - Well, it worked out somewhat.

Later I only need to transfer, if I don’t miss that one…

I had hammered the shortest route in my head. I couldn’t even afford a mistake of 1 second. 

I promised to have that performance with her, the first step towards our future. I could absolutely not be late.

Ever since enrolling, she had always continued to support me without saying anything.

She had made that song just for me.

I can’t think of any other partner besides her. I want to debut with her music.

And that’s why I don’t want to betray her as well.

I don’t want to create sad memories on a day like today.

Today, for the first time, we will perform her songs in front of a lot of people, and that day should be celebrated.

I’ll show you that I can make it in time.

I will gain her trust and we will definitely debut.

But contrary to my thoughts, reality is a cruel thing.

The train I was on came to a sudden stop.

Why not at a station…?

At least I could have gotten off at a station and transferred to a different line.

In this giant mass of silver with no place to run, my impatience only grew stronger.

My chest ached at the thought of her waiting until the last minute because she believed in me.

Continuing to wait for someone when you don’t even know if they will come, can’t help to be bitter about that.

However, …

She would be waiting, right?

“Hurry up…”

I noticed I had been strongly clenching my fist, and my nails had dug itself deeply into my hand, leaving red marks.

“Move. Start moving.”

Whether or not my prayer had gone through, the train finally started moving.

However, this didn’t mean the problem was solved.

The train arrived at the nearest station, and ended up coming to a halt again.

“I’m not waiting anymore.”

I jumped out at the station and picked up a taxi at the nearest road.

“To Saotome Academy… It doesn’t matter if you use the highway, please take the shortest route.”

“Got it.”

The taxy driver quickly understood my intention.

However, …

Just a few kilometres from Saotome Academy we got stuck into a traffic jam and the car came to a stop.

This is a one-way road, so you can’t make a detour.

The school festival performances should already have begun, right?

My time had already passed.

I wonder what she’s doing…

Would she have given up, or even, would she continue to wait while believing in me?

You can’t give up, until the last second…!

Please don’t give up.

“I’m sorry. I’m getting off.”

Even if I wait, the traffic jam might not be dissolved. That’s why I have no choice but to run.

“Please wait for me. I’ll definitely come rushing.”

I promised her.

That I would definitely come.

She said she would be waiting.

I can’t betray those feelings.

If they were on schedule, then all the performances should have been finished by now.

But if I hurry, I might still be able to sing a little.

I won’t let the time that I have spent with her until now go to waste.

My dream, and her as well…

To take everything…

I don’t want to give up on anything.

It’s not that everything goes successfully. I know to wish that is an illusion, but let me see my dream at any cost.

The future I walk with her.

The day I can debut as myself…

I can’t stop these feelings anymore.

I’m going now.

That’s why, I ask you.

Please wait for me.

Haruka!

Maybe because I’ve been running at full speed since I left the taxi, my mouth had become parch dry and my breathing was also laboured.

But my heart cannot stop.

With every step I take, my speed increases instead.

I want to see her.

I want to see her as fast as possible.

Only that thought was driving me.

I’m begging you.

Please…!

Feeling like I was praying, I opened the door to the lecture hall.

I lost my hope.

The performances had ended.

There was no one left to listen to our song.

The lighting was turned off, and the lecture hall had calmed down.

Only the afterglow of the enthusiasm remained.

However, she was there.

It had ended.

I didn’t make it in time.

I couldn’t uphold my promise.

And yet…

I was happy that you were there. I felt absolutely worthless for not having been able to make it in time…

When I found myself at the mercy of these two conflicting emotions, I ended up hugging her.

Thank you for waiting for me.

I’m sorry.

I ended up making you wait quite a lot.

I can’t lie to such a dedicated person any longer.

I will tell her everything, and on top of that, let’s do this together. (t/n: 共に歩むis often used in “let’s live our lives together” )

That’s what I decided in that moment.

[lost-jams]

Brushes and Beats chapter 15

pairing: JiminxReader

genre: fluff with a pinch of angst

trope: enemies to lovers

:never have i ever wished to be someone else:

Y/n's POV

present time,

Sweating palms and a jumping heart, that's how my anticipation manifests itself as I sit in front of my mirror, readying for my date with Jin. His sweet gestures and ready smiles have always charmed me, but on this occasion, the colors of my outfit seem to blur into one another, my reflection in the mirror revealing unease rather than excitement.

I start applying my makeup meticulously as if aiming to paint away my guilt rather than highlighting my features. There's a looming feeling in my chest, weighing me down, and it's not about tonight's choice of lipstick or whether I've paired the right accessories. It's about him. Park Jimin. This perfect pop star with a voice that makes heartbeats sound like a melody.

I feel my cheeks heat up just thinking about him. Once friends, then nuisance, and now this confusing muddle of emotions that I can't seem to navigate. The guilt emerges more. I'm not being fair to Jin, or to myself. I feel like I'm teetering on the edge of something I’m not sure I’m ready to confront.

In the reality of that moment, my foundation brush in hand seems to hold more power than it ever had. It's no longer just an instrument to perfect artistry but a symbol of the diversion of my feelings. As I lock my eyes with my own despairing gaze in the mirror, I know what I need to do. I have to put my heart first, even if it means embracing an agonizing truth.

The question now isn't whether I'm ready for this date, but whether I'm ready to face the whirlwind of my own feelings. With a deep breath and a determined resolve, I finish applying my makeup and decide to go with a bold red lip to match the intensity of the emotions that I'm about to confront.

The doorbell rings, and before I know it, I'm standing face-to-face with Jin. His warm smile momentarily eases the turmoil within me, but as we exchange pleasantries, a pang of guilt resurfaces. It's unfair to him to pretend that everything is fine when my heart is consumed by someone else. His genuine kindness and affection only amplify the internal struggle that I've been hiding for far too long.

The resounding words of Jin's laughter shake me out of my thoughts, reminding me of the present moment. I push aside my inner turmoil, focusing on being the best version of myself for Jin. Keeping the evening light and enjoyable is my priority, and I know I owe it to Jin to give him my undivided attention. We make our way to the restaurant, the atmosphere buzzing with conversations and clinking cutlery. As we sit across from each other at the table, the conversation flows effortlessly. Our laughter melds into the ambient noise of the bustling restaurant as we share stories and anecdotes. "It's amazing how well we get along," Jin remarks, his eyes filled with warmth as he gazes at me.

At that moment, I'm struck by a sense of bittersweetness. "It is indeed amazing," I reply, my voice tinged with a mix of sincerity and hesitation. I can feel the weight of my conflicting emotions pressing against my chest, threatening to spill out and shatter the illusion of happiness that Jin sees in me, trying to subside my emotions and keep the facade content, my hand accidentally hits my wine glass, causing it to topple and spill onto the pristine white tablecloth. "I'M SO SORRY!" I exclaim, my face flushing with embarrassment as I scramble to grab napkins and mop up the mess. As I frantically attempt to clean up the wine spill, a familiar voice cuts through the commotion, "Need a hand?" Without looking up from the wine-soaked tablecloth, my breath catches in my throat as I recognize the timbre of that voice - it's him.

What is he doing here?

As I slowly raise my head to meet his gaze, our eyes lock in a moment of silent recognition. For a brief moment, time freezes as our eyes connect across the room. The intensity in his eyes are undeniable as it shift from me to Jin and back to me again. "Ahh, no it's fine I've got it under control," I stammer, my heart pounding in my chest.

Jimin's lips curl into a smirk as he saunters over to the table anyway, disregarding my feeble attempt to dismiss him. "Seems like you could use a hand," Jimin says smoothly, his voice dripping with amusement. "Yes, it's ok we got it under control," Jin interjects, his tone friendly but firm. Jimin raises an eyebrow at Jin's comment, a playful challenge gleaming in his eyes...

"Excuse me? Is it ok if we change our table?" Jin asks the waiter, shooting a quick apologetic glance in my direction. A few moments pass as the waiter considers Jin's request, and finally nods, leading us to a different table in a quieter corner of the restaurant.

"I'm so sorry, I did-"

" Relax, Y/n It's just wine," Jin cut me off gently, his voice laced with reassurance with a smile resting on his face. The waiter comes to check on us. Again, we reassure him

of how delicious everything is. Everything’s flippin’ perfect "Isn't he the-"

"Who?"

"The guy from earlier, isn't he Park Jimin?"

A slice of panic opens in my gut

"I'm not sure, I didn't get a good look"

Jin shrugged and indulged back to his food, while my attention was stolen by something, rather someone. My heart jolted when my eyes found him, sitting in the right far corner of the room.

He looks like he is waiting for someone.

Soon after he stands up and walks to the door, he comes back again but he is not alone. there is no doubt that he is on a date, it's purely shown by the way he pulls out the chair for her. I steal quick glances at him from the corner of my eye while staying engaged in conversation with Jin. Yet despite my best efforts, my mind drifts towards him, towards Park Jimin. He's sitting there, engrossed in his own world, with a date of his own.

What a player.

She was gorgeous, Her long hair spilled over her shoulder like soft ocean waves, Her aura screamed radiance like she was the center of attention and awareness in the moment.

An odd silence circles our table. Maybe Jin has noticed my distraction, or is it the lack of my sincere involvement? I smile, trying to fill the void, then ask him something about his work. Despite my trying to appear normal, I couldn't help but let my gaze stray to Jimin’s table again. Each glance adds another layer of guilt, another layer of turmoil.

Jin’s voice breaks me out of my thoughts, reminds me of where I am, and with whom - with Jin, who’s charming, and kind, and deserves someone who gives him their full attention, not someone whose mind is irrevocably tied to the person at table nine.

Was this jealousy?

I twist in my chair trying to keep a blank face and hide my emotions. Hoping he won't notice.

My heart beats faster as I watch him stand up and pour a glass of champagne for her, his date. It's a gesture so simple, and yet the elegance of it is solely him - it's pure Jimin. And it hurts because I wish, irrationally, illogically, desperately, that he was holding the glass out for me. I force myself to look away.

As much as I want to deny it, the very presence of Jimin in the room inflames the dormant emotions inside me; emotions I thought I had shelved away. Suddenly, the room feels too small for this whirlwind of unsaid words and unprocessed emotions. I feel caught between two worlds, both alluring yet so vastly different.

What a stark difference between me and her...can't blame him

"Shit they need me in the hospital"

We hurriedly stand up, not realizing they - Jimin and his date - had finished as well, heading to the only elevator in the building. Already jam-packed with people, we squeezed ourselves in, standing all too close to one another. The moment we all crammed in, a shrill beep rang out, the light above flashing a warning - over maximum weight capacity.

Eyes dart around the elevator, a bout of confusion plaguing everyone. It was then, I decided to take the initiative, "I'll get off," I mumble quickly, mustering a polite smile, "I, uh...need to use the restroom anyway."

With my foot halfway out the door, I find myself locking eyes with Jimin, who, much to my surprise, is positioned right at the back of the crowded elevator. "Are you sure, Y/n?" Jin inquires, drawing me back from the captivating pull of Jimin's gaze.

"Yeah," I mutter, not daring enough to take my eyes off Jimin. He gives nothing away, his expression an unreadable mask, yet something flickers in his eyes. Is it confusion? Annoyance? Or something more complicated? The intensity of his gaze makes my heart pound. There is an unspoken thread between us, unseen yet utterly palpable.

Each moment of eye contact feels as if we are enveloped in a bubble where it's only us. We're surrounded by people, yet it feels utterly alone as the world of ours that is filled with unspoken questions and pent-up feelings. Our ways might have parted yet there is an unsaid conversation that pulls us together.

As the elevator door begins to close, I force out a nod and step back, breaking eye contact. With the metallic slide of the doors, the connection is broken, his figure out of sight. The separation doesn’t ease the tension. If anything, it accentuates the fact that nothing is resolved between us.

I make a turn on my heels and stride off towards the restroom, the intensity of the encounter still searing through my veins, my heart pounding loud in my chest. I can't keep ignoring this

I didn't want anything. Not with Jin. Not with anyone except...

I realize, my hand trembling slightly as I splash water onto my face. I have to face this, face him - Park Jimin. With a deep breath, I look up into the mirror, meeting my own gaze with determination. No more running.

But first I need to do something.

And I found myself behind a door, I never thought I would knock on.

"You?"

"Hi Yoongi"

to be continued...

chapter 14 || chapter 16

[stick-named-figure]

quick post on the music in episode 22: parkour.

i have work i need to be doing but i can't stop thinking about the music here. it's not a complete analysis, there's a call that's repeated but i'm not sure why and i need to find out.

so first of all, i look like this right now. remember i don't care whether an artistic choice was an accident or a non-choice. no just blue curtains in this house.

anyway. this episode does REALLY well with music. scott buckley did a great job on the score. i'll give buckley a handshake and a trophy any day of the week.

use the video as needed, because i'm going to be providing timestamps.

the start of the music is really nice. i'm not sure what quality it is but it sounds a lot like the older minecraft music. the quiet marimba just hits different.

anyway. green is the first one to notice that something's wrong. green's very observant, but that observation also seems to be directly connected to purple. the running melody that appears at 0:44 is on a clarinet, the instrument that's directly tied to green. it comes to a peak as red tries to jump over the piglin and moves into a string section's part, though i can't tell whether it's a violin section or a viola. might just be a "string section" sound.

i don't have much to say about that part (musically. i have plenty of autism i need to get out about how the stick figures handle themselves in this entire video, but that's going to be 30 minutes worth of reading time stuff), because the real reason i wanted to write this post is the part where king is revealed.

at 1:48, purple walks towards king as a much slower ascending violin section plays. it slows as king is revealed fully. there's a cute little reference at 2:06 to "in the hall of the mountain king" by edvard grieg as king has purple show off the minecraft maps with king's plan on them. obviously the crown and everything tells us what king is, but the musical nod is nice too.

anyway the post is about that melody at 1:48. it only plays fully once, it's a four bar melody. every other time it plays it's cut short or modified. the next time we hear it is at 2:45, as orange decides to jump off the platform. the music as orange runs through the looping section goes hard btw.

after that, there's more musical build up as the screen reveals what the place the stick figures are in actually looks like. that reveal makes me go wild. really good. also king's reveal. that goes crazy.

also the dead silence as it's shown king's been drawing little pictures for AT LEAST 4 minutes straight is so fucking funny. purple is bored out of their fucking mind watching this old guy draw for 4 minutes.

the imperial march rhythm at 5:08 is nice too. king later uses "forceHold" on green. that's not an actual command. it's just a reference to star wars.

the real exciting part is when purple tries to take off at 5:30, where that melody comes back again, and is again cut short as green tackles purple back down. it's cut short at the same point as when orange decided to jump off the platform, but this time there's a response, a descending violin section. ascension and descension are very important melodic types for purple, and i'll talk about that later when i can spare the time to finish my essay on episode 29.

the fourth time we hear it is at 5:50, when purple tries to take off and nearly escapes. the start is a bit muddled, but it's only 3 bars, an incomplete resolution for the melody we've been presented.

this melody is purple's. it's not their motif (that's in episode 29), and it's not king's, because king only gets the one usage of the melody. it plays fully when purple believes they've succeeded in the tasks that king has given them.

it's cut short when orange is the first one to escape the platform. it's cut short when green grabs them, and it's cut short again when green stops them.

it's a very good usage of theme. i really hope that motifs keep showing up in the ost because i love tearing them apart. yes i was into undertale.

[snow-system-wol]

A short thing -- taking a nice moment after Doma's liberation before heading back to Gyr Abania:

If it wasn't for Alisaie's grip on his hand, S'ria felt he'd have bolted by now. As is, he let himself be gently pulled along. He did his best to suppress the anxious swish of his tail. The ambient humidity from the hot springs was doing nothing to ease his ability to breathe.

"Are you… really sure this is okay? I don't think I'm meant to be here."

"We've gotten a private space, so it's really not anyone else's business."

"Yes, but… did you ask the others if I could join?"

Alisaie let go of his hand and turned to face him.

"Do you want to leave? You still can. We just knew you were never going to go with the guys, and it seems quite a shame to miss out on the joy of a good soak."

S'ria doesn't bother protesting. He briefly imagined sitting in the hot springs with Hien and Alphinaud and whatever other random men there'd be – no, he wouldn't have accepted that offer.

Alisaie looked at him with more sympathy than he'd care for. "Additionally, I did ask first. We'd all like to see you relax for a moment before we finish travel preparations."

S'ria exhaled slowly, becoming increasingly aware that they were having this conversation in the middle of the hallway, solidly in the women's side of the structure.

"Okay, okay, let's go. As long as no one is uncomfortable."

Alisaie returned to her task of leading him.

"At least two of us girls are exclusively into women, so I frankly fail to see the problem here."

S'ria let himself laugh. "Yes, I guess it would be a double standard."

--------

As much as S'ria had felt briefly confident about the prospect, and remained excited about the idea of introducing his tired body to a hot spring soak – some of the comfort did up and vanish once he was actually in the changing area. It wasn't too bad, he wasn't afraid at least.

True to Alisaie's word, Lyse and Yugiri didn't seem particularly bothered or confused by him walking in. And at the very least, this little area was reserved for them, as was the partially walled-off pool beyond. Perks of having just led a revolution, it would seem.

Still, he didn't exactly make a habit of stripping in front of his friends. The few times some amount of group river-bathing had become necessary on the road were…unpleasant. S'ria still recalled deliberating over the choice to either remain covered in blood or jump in a far-too-cold river alongside Estinien as being an ordeal. 

He simply chose to believe that nobody was looking at him as he removed the rest of his clothes and went to go clean himself. The buckets of water provided for that purpose were cold, but he suffered through it for the sake of good etiquette. S'ria wandered out to the spring itself, and it did look very inviting. As much as he did not want to leave his towel folded on the rocks, it took only a few moments to lower himself into the water.

As soon as he was submerged up to his chest, he immediately felt his body go boneless, his tired muscles relaxing. Oh, Alisaie was right, this was absolutely worth it.

S'ria leaned his head back on the edge of the pool and let his eyes fall shut. Distantly, he realized that he was purring so loudly. His ears caught the soft footsteps of the others leaving the changing area, as well as the muffled whisper of Yugiri asking whether that was a good or bad noise, and he tried to tone it down to just a low rumble.

Their little section of the springs was large enough that, with the four of them, there was ample room for personal space in the water. While S'ria heard the quiet splashes of them stepping into the pool, none of the sounds were directly near him.

S'ria cautiously opened his eyes after a few moments to see the others similarly melting in relaxation, paying absolutely no mind to him, and let them slide closed again. Here, with the soft sounds of water and the distant call of seabirds, everything else demanding his worry briefly felt so distant.

[wafflesetc]

do you think jay's character and upstead will be further ruined so completely ooc? i don't understand how that would sell jay hailey not calling/in touch... now i understand why jesse and tracy didn't put a signature on 10x03 so hashtags and was completely blank... do you think tracy would drop out? because if so it should have been published already or do you think it would be kept secret? do you think tracy's #upsteadforever was a sign or not?

Hi, sorry it has taken me so long to answer this.

Hot take here, I actually don't think a lot of what we are seeing and what we have seen is OOC. I've said this before, but I get where they were coming from with Jay's exit arc. Personally, knowing what I know about the military, I don't think he's full active duty again. He's a lot older than he was when he first did his spins. Also, I don't think people have really touched on this aspect about his characters, but back in the earlier seasons, with Mouse, we know there was some sort of attack on his convoy and they both were injured in some way. It could have lead to an honorable medical discharge - which, it can be hard to rejoin the military on one of those. It's not impossible, it's just a lot of hoops to jump through. Add in the injuries he's sustained while being a cop and it would make it that much harder. So, all of that to say, I think he's working as a DOD contractor with a specific contract. He's employed by the Army but isn't in the Army. Ok, I'll get off that soapbox now. All of that to say, Jay's choices made some sense to me. There are little aspects of it though, like not talking to Hailey about it, him leaving that night, parts of the first two episodes, etc., that I do struggle with but I think the things that I am unhappy about are all because of pacing and the fact it was only three episodes. If we had been given 9 episodes like SVU did for Kelli, I think we all might feel a little bit different about the exit.

The not calling/getting in touch is a hard one for me. While I can see where there would be logistical issues for them to communicate, he's not in a full war zone like he was before. As someone who travels frequently for work out of the country, I know that cell phones work everywhere. He could be in more remote places where cell service is hard to come by, but there are satellite phones for a reason. I lean on the side that the show is doing/saying they aren't talking for shock value, and to add to Hailey's arc this season. I don't really like it, I don't think it's really per se in character for the two of them, but it is what it is. (That's why I write come back, be here).

Tracy and Jesse are smart. They know what they are doing with social media, even when they don't use it all that much. I think it's a little telling and says somethings when they didn't tag the show, or use any hashtags like they have done in the past. I'm not going to elaborate on it here because this is already long, but I think you can tell they aren't very happy with the circumstances.

I waiver back and forth on whether she will stay or go, it does depend on the day. I'm linking an ask I've answered about Tracy going/staying because that answer is wordy too.

As far as timing with her, my best assumption knowing the little I do about entertainment contracts is usually when you sign on for a new show you sign a 5-7 year contract. If it's a pilot episode, that means IF the show gets picked up. Tracy was in a different spot because PD was already syndicating through seasons. So, signing in between seasons 4-5 would probably lead to her initial contract being up for renewal at the end of 10. (I'll also add that the show is up for renewal this year, so I would also assume more of the cast is up for renewal, not just her.) So.... I think right now, she's more or less tethered to finishing out season 10. That would mean we probably wouldn't hear just yet if she's renewing or not. I wouldn't expect to hear anything until after we get word about the show getting renewed or not, which I think will probably be around May time, when Upfronts usually occur.

And, to conclude, I firmly believe in the #UpsteadForever tag. If they wanted to do something drastic with Jay or Upstead, I do think they would have already done it before he left. They continued to keep them married and are continuing to have her wear her ring... They aren't doing that for kicks and giggles. I really do believe the lines, "We're good, and we're always gonna be good." (And the fact it applies to them in their partnership, relationship, and marriage).

[occasionallykettle]

i think the best time that milkvan could break up would be around an episode before the time-jump. maybe even within the first 30 minutes of season 5, if we're lucky.

i want to be able to see the repercussions of their breakup, like mike telling lucas in an attempt to distract him from max for a while (for context, lucas has been sitting by max's side for an unhealthy amount, both mentally and physically).

and lucas doesn't know whether to say sorry or not until mike is finished talking, where, to mike's surprise, he congratulates him. mike figures that lucas is the best person to talk to about it, because lucas has experience in a healthy relationship, and mike doesn't really know how to feel at that point. because he knows he's supposed to feel sad, but he can't bring himself to. so lucas re-assuring mike that his feelings are actually justified comes as a shock to mike (albeit a pleasant one). in addition, we get to see lucas give a little smirk as mike exits the hospital room (by order of a nurse), because secretly, he knows that the next step is byler.

or mike going to will second, after he sees lucas, with the intent of informing him that el and him have broken up (because obviously mike is going to tell will, will is his best friend after all), but he just doesn't come to saying it. will is just a tad bit confused why mike wants to spend time with him all of a sudden, despite ignoring him all of summer break. when will inquires about it, mike starts stammering and doesn't know how to respond, because his subconscious thought that he was "moving too quickly" after a break-up.

only by someone else (probably nancy or jonathan, or possibly murray if we are feeling lucky) does will get filled in on the fact that mike and el broke up. will doesn't know how to feel about it; whether he should ask el if she's okay, he doesn't know. he then feels guilty for wanting to spend more time with mike after learning that mike and el broke up, trying to get rid of his hopes, and ends up trying to distance himself from mike to prevent himself from hurting anyone.

and i also want mike telling dustin and then dustin just immediately moving the subject onto will. like dustin already sensed that mike and el weren't working out, and he sort of predicted will and mike getting together since they all became friends. then mike gets all flustered, and dustin says "you're like bright red right now," similar to how he said it with steve. except this time, dustin is playing matchmaker with the right people.

(perhaps a little off topic) and then, even if this is after the time-jump, i want el to tell max about it. el telling max about them breaking up, max immediately coming to the conclusion that mike broke el's heart, but then after el assures her that she was the one to break up with him, max comforts el about that being the best choice to make.

[translationwala]

Lost in Translation? Here’s What To Look For in a Document Translation Services

There has never been a bigger need for accurate and dependable Document Translation Services than there is now. The wide range of translation services available can be confusing, whether you’re a business trying to reach more people around the world, an individual dealing with foreign paperwork, or a creative person wanting to share your work with more people. No need to worry, language fighters! To make sure you find a translation service that gets your message across correctly and avoids any “Lost in Translation” mistakes, read this guide.

Understanding Your Needs: The First Step

Take a moment to think about what you need before you jump right into the world of translation services. Are you interpreting a law document, a professional guide, a sales brochure, or a great work of literature? Different amounts of skill and specific understanding are needed for each type of paper. You can choose a service that gets the details and intricacies of your paper if you know its purpose, audience, and cultural context.

Quality Above All Else: Seeking Accuracy and Fluency

To translate something correctly, you need to do more than just swap words from one tongue to another. It means getting to the heart of the original writing while making sure it is proper for the target culture and language. Look for translation services that hire native-speaking translators who know how to translate the type of paper you have. They should know a lot about both the main language and the target language, as well as the culture behind each. Watch out for services that offer “one-size-fits-all” options or that only use machine translation, as this can lead to mistakes and confusion.

Qualifications and Experience: Building Trust and Expertise

Trustworthy translation services will be happy to show off their skills and experience. Check for credentials from well-known translation groups like the Institute of Translation and Interpreting (ITI) or the American Translators Association (ATA). Also, find out what titles the interpreters have and how much experience they have with your business or type of paper. You can also get a good idea of their quality and dependability by asking to see examples of their past work and getting references from happy clients.

Communication is Key: Building a Collaborative Partnership

A translation job can’t be successful without good communication. Select a service that puts an emphasis on open and clear contact at all times. This means talking about your goals, timelines, and funds right away, as well as giving regular reports and chances for feedback. Working together makes sure that the finished version is exactly what you want it to be and fits your goals.

Security and Confidentiality: Protecting Sensitive Information

Safety and privacy are very important when working with private papers like medical records or legal contracts. Make sure that the translation service follows strict rules about data privacy and uses strong security to keep your information safe. Check for certifications like ISO 27001, which shows that they care about keeping your information safe.

Beyond Translation: Value-Added Services

There are some translation services that offer extra services that can make the whole experience better. Some examples of this are cultural advice, localization (making changes to the translation to fit a certain area or culture), desktop publishing, and even voice-over services. If these extra services fit your needs and price, you might want to look into them.

Price and Value: Striking the Right Balance

Even though price is important, it shouldn’t be the only one. It’s nice when prices are reasonable, but keep in mind that the cheapest choice isn’t always the best. Find a service that charges a good price for the work they do, their knowledge, and any extra services they offer that are worth the money. You can think of it as an investment in clear communication that will save you a lot of money in the long run.

Conclusion: Choosing the Right Partner for Your Translation Journey

You have to do some study and be careful to find the best Document Translation Services. You can feel positive about starting your translation path if you know what you need, put quality and experience first, communicate clearly and safely, and find a good price-to-value ratio. This will help your message get to the right people clearly and effectively. Remember that a good translation service is not just a supplier; they are also a partner in your business success. So, stop being confused and having trouble translating, and feel free to move around in the world of languages!

Source: https://translationwala.wordpress.com/2024/02/06/lost-in-translation-heres-what-to-look-for-in-a-document-translation-services/

[madam-wakefield]

OPEN WHEN… CHAPTER 20

A03 Link 

Summary:

Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13  Chapter 14  Chapter 15  Chapter 16 Chapter 17 Chapter 18 Chapter 19 When a few years into their relationship Bernie is asked to go back to the army and deploy Serena isn’t sure how she’s going to get through the nine months without her girlfriend. What she doesn’t expect is for it to be her girlfriend who has the perfect set of surprises to get her through both the best and the worst days. Canon divergent - Elinor lives (well actually the accident never happens), Raf lives, and Cameron isn’t a total ass! The staff of AAU also probably didn’t all work on there at the same time in canon but do in this! The fic is already fully written with the first few chapters having already been Beta’d. 27 chapters including the epilogue. Hoping to post every Monday and Friday!

Open when you need a treat…

Serena feels so morose. She’s snappy and moody and God just not herself. The F1s always wind her up but she’s a professional and she’s their teacher and it’s her job to train and guide them into being the best medical versions of themselves that they can be. It is not her job to bite their heads off because they ask her for her opinion during a consult.

She also really respects Hanssen. There is no one else she’d rather have at the helm of the hospital, but if he asks her to attend one more budget meeting where he tells her that budgets are stretched and that she might end up having to defend the trauma unit then she might tell him to fuck off too.

She doesn’t want to be in a budget meeting that will certainly go on hours past when it’s meant to, where she’ll be asked her opinion on things that she quite frankly couldn’t care less about. She has a ward full of patients downstairs and a bunch of F1s and F2s who need her medical expertise to actually assure that AAU and the trauma unit continue with their statistically good figures, so that if she does end up defending the trauma unit, like Hanssen keeps threatening, though not through his own choice or doing, that she actually has a bloody leg to stand on.

She will not have Bernie’s trauma unit ripped apart, knows deep down that thanks to their joint skills and expertise and along with Raf recently stepping up to the plate that the trauma unit in AAU is one of the best in the country. That it is almost certainly one of the least threatened places in their hospital. She’s glad of that, but it makes her feel guilty too, guilty for her colleagues who maybe haven’t got so good statistics not through fault of their own but just due to the nature of the job, and the damn budget cuts themselves already making things harder. She can’t imagine the hospital without any of the colleagues sat around her, she doesn’t want to, and she won’t.

None of them should be here right now, listening to the drone about lack of funding and discrepancies and unfulfilled government promises. It’s why so many people are jumping ship and going to work for the dark side, or well at least the private hospitals, where overtime and lack of staff and equipment aren’t an issue. Where the most profound issue is probably whether the patient wants a side room or a same sex only ward.

When the meeting is finally finished, three hours after its scheduled end time, she thinks it might be a record. She goes back to the ward; she’s got surgery to perform and a mountain of paperwork to do. So, when she walks into see three of her F1s having a chat around the nurses’ station, her already frayed temper is gone, and the look in their eyes as she orders them all into her office tells her they know it.

She doesn’t mean to go on but once her rant has started, she can’t help herself. She tells them about their responsibilities to be professional and dependable and all those other things that they nearly always are. She tells them without risking the confidentiality of the meetings she’s just been sat in, what a knife edge they are all working on. How every second they spend on the ward is precious and needs treating a such. She reminds them that in these moments that the patients are literally putting their life into their hands and that they, with her guidance are literally responsible for that and that isn’t a responsibility to take lightly. It isn’t a responsibility she Serena takes lightly and if they don’t want to step up to the plate and take the responsibility seriously that they need to get off her ward.

They all apologise to her sheepishly, and it’s only once they’ve gone, and her office door is shut that she feels guilty. It’s not their fault she’s in a mood, everything that’s going on in this hospital today and major mood swings that she can only guess are linked to her age and the menopause. And if the mood swings weren’t enough the hot flushes are just about to do her in and why when they are in a funding crisis does the NHS insist that the heating around the hospital needs to be on!

She expects to be left alone, her door is shut and with the mood she is in she’s sure that is message enough to everyone to leave her be. She sits down, deciding that she’ll do a bit of her own paperwork before risking stepping foot on the actual ward again. But there is a knock at the door, and then Raf enters without waiting for her response, it is sort of his office too at the present, she thinks maybe he’s got some paperwork of his own to do so is instead shocked when he starts talking to her.

“That was harsh.” She misses what he says still too preoccupied with the fact he’s actually talking to her. Only Bernie normally risks talking to her when she’s in this mood.

“Pardon,” she says, willing herself to stay calm at the interruption because her paperwork won’t do itself.

“I said that was harsh, you made one of the F1s cry, and that’s not like you.”

Serena puts her head in her hands, rubbing roughly at her forehead and Raf continues to speak. “Don’t you remember what it was like? Being an F1 is tough, and they need each other and sometimes that five minutes to get together is the moral boost they need to get through the rest of the shift. They we’re all super useful while you were in your meeting, which I’m going to assume is at least part of the reason you are in such a mood.” Serena wants to interrupt, to tell Raf he is being damn well rude, but she can’t because she knows it’s true. “They stepped up to the plate when you weren’t here especially as you were gone so much longer than you were due to be, which before you say anything I know isn’t your fault. And maybe they just needed each other because for once, they didn’t have you to turn to for that reassurance, because I know that’s what they’ve come to expect from you, and they respect you for it.”

She lets Raf’s words sink in for a minute, the office is strangely quiet, only the sounds from the ward outside can be heard. She wants to argue or tell him to fuck off and mind his own business, but she can’t because what he’s said is true.

“I’m sorry,” she says shaking her head again. “I’d got so much planned for today so to end up in a five-hour finance meeting was not on the cards. And we all know that I don’t take well to being interrupted.”

“It’s not me you need to apologise to, it’s them. But saying that I get it, things suck sometimes. So, before you apologise and seeing as it’s my breaktime, and you deserve a break after a five-hour long meeting, we are going to pulses, for a strong hot coffee! And why don’t you see if your Major has a little message for you that might stop you from biting anyone else’s head off today.”

She feels like she should be scandalised that Raf knows about the envelopes, but she guesses not, they are sat on her work desk often enough just in case. She finds one “Serena – open when you need a treat…” Hope’s that she knows Bernie well enough to think that somehow something sweet might be involved and pockets it to open later, Raf might know about the envelopes, but she isn’t willing to share their content with anyone.

The coffee does her some good, she almost argues when he insists that she needs a double espresso rather than her usual, but after she’s drank it and they’ve had the time just sharing a bit of small talk, Raf filling her in on the latest misdemeanours of Fletcher’s children, she has to say she’s feeling a lot better.

Once their coffee is all gone Raf looks at his watch knows it’s time that at least one of them got back to the ward but looks at her knowingly. “Go on, go open your letter and I’ll hold fort down on the ward for you, I’m assuming you have your pager just in case?” Serena flashes him the pager, doesn’t go anywhere without it in this hospital since Bernie has been gone and she’s been responsible for the trauma unit before she decided to retreat to the roof to open Bernie’s letter.

She perches herself on the steps and turns quickly to the letter, it might be sunny, but the wind at the top of the roof is making it cold.

My Dearest Serena,

The time has come that you need a treat. I know how you love two things, a bottle of good shiraz and a decent sweet fix! Now I don’t know where you are opening this letter, but I know the former would not be a good idea for in the hospital, so I’ve left you a treat in each place.

If you are at work and in need of a treat, then go in my bottom drawer, it’s tidy for a change you’d be impressed, and I’ve left you a share bar of your favourite chocolate, only don’t tell anyone because you don’t have to share. If you are at home, or if you are at work right now and for when you get home later, after the chocolate is all gone, we both know it’ll only last you one sitting. There is a bottle of your favourite Shiraz hidden at the back of my closet where I keep my shoes, somewhere I knew you had no reason to go while I’m away so that I wouldn’t risk you finding it early.

I’m not sure why you need a treat if it's because you are having a bad day or just because you’re in the mood to treat yourself. Whatever the reason go and enjoy in the knowledge that I am missing you like crazy but that I also love you just as much.

All My Love Bernie,

Your Big Macho Army Medic x

Serena stays for a few minutes after reading the letter, thankful that Bernie really does know her so well, that she can provide in some ways exactly what Serena needs from three thousand miles away. She can’t help but smile of course Bernie had hidden it to stop her finding it, and she guesses she chose the two best places, Serena always avoids Bernie’s drawers, knows if she goes in them, she’ll have to give her a lecture about her lack of house, or well office keeping. She also knew that Serena would go through her closet on more than one occasion both to put away the clothes that had been in the wash basket before she deployed and to just occasionally wear a few of those jumpers that had just smelt so much like Bernie when she’d missed her just a little too much.

She goes back to the ward after that, finds each of the F1s in turn and apologises to each of them, thoroughly and sincerely, setting an example to them so they know it’s okay to make mistakes but that owning up to them is important to. They tell her it’s okay and that they understand and within minutes it’s like it never happened.

She goes into her office after that, opening Bernie’s desk draw pleasantly surprised that true to her word it is clean and tidy and there sat on top of everything is her own favourite Cadbury chocolate bar. She opens it as she sits at her desk to work slowly through at least some of her paperwork mountain, knowing that someone on the ward will come and get her if they need her assistance.

 She doesn’t need to share but when Raf walks in a little over an hour later, she extends the purple wrapper towards him, her own thank you and peace offering. The wine she finds when she gets home however, she definitely does not share.