#so me and my younger sibling who both can cook often volunteer to cook for the family. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

thefanficmonster · 3 years

Text

Matured

Corpse Husband & Little Sister Reader (Female)

Warnings: Swearing

Genre: Sibling Fluff, Humor, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Corpse’s search for a roommate ends shortly after his little sister calls him, telling him she’s moving out of her high school dorm in the suburbs following her graduation to attend college in San Francisco.

Requested by @bugger2002 Hi darling! Thank you so much for this adorable request, I had such a fun time turning it into a fic! Sorry it has taken me so long to complete it but here it finally is and I hope you enjoy the read! Love, Vy ❤

Alright, it’s been a month since Y/N announced she’d be moving in with me - no, she didn’t ask if she could nor if I’d want her to, she straight up casually informed me she’d be moving in with me since she’s starting college. I’m lucky she even thought to tell me, knowing her it wouldn’t have been so strange for her to just show up on my doorstep with a grin like “Alright, I live here now.” Having a six years younger sister who can act both younger and older than me - sometimes both at the same time - is a bit complex. Obviously, my protective and nurturing brotherly instinct kicks in whenever she complains to me about something, but seconds later she tells me she’s taken care of it already and I feel like a fool for overreacting even if it was only internal. She’s calm and rational when she needs to be and a reckless airhead whose only goal is to have fun when she wants to be.

And judging by her and her friends’ main methods of obtaining said fun I can see how much alike we are: playing drunk video games, drunk darts, drunk pool. You see, there’s a lot of drinking involved and that’s something I’m greatly unhappy with and have scolded her on countless times just to get a fake promise, probably with fingers crossed behind her back - that she’ll cut down the alcohol. Not to mention she’s not even old enough to drink so I’ve been very insistent on her cutting her bad habit. She’s tried calling me hypocritical at times but she can’t do so rightfully since I’m, you know, of drinking age. So she’s basically bound by law to follow my advice and orders.

At least now that she’ll be staying with me I’ll be able to keep a better eye on her. A rascal high school student will either mature-up in college or go even more downhill. I aim to make her fall in the first category, but I’m making no promises - she’s very unruly, just like me. Damn, never did I think my own traits would come hitting me in the back of the head like a boomerang but here we are.

Regardless of all the crap I’ve just spewed about her, she’s a wonderful girl. She’s always been my pillar of support and never gets tired of it. She never misses a call of mine and has never not replied to a message of mine, no matter how drunk she’s been. She’s never skipped a Saturday night Skype call, no matter how busy she’s been. She’s never let herself forget she has a brother who often times needs her by his side.

Once she even talked one of her friends who has a car and a driver’s license drive her all the way to my apartment complex when I was having a really bad anxiety attack and legit couldn’t talk on the phone. She went door to door to find which apartment I live in and stayed with me the whole weekend she was supposed to spend at a music festival or something. It’s not wonder she’ll be a med student - she’s always wanted to be a nurse and has practically been my personal nurse since she was twelve. She maybe wasn’t always physically present to help me, but she’s a great instruction giver for when I need her and she’s unable to come to my aid.

Well now, we’ll both be there to aid one another.

“BEEP BEEP FUCKER!“

I nearly flip off my chair at the distinct yelling coming from directly below my window. I’d recognize that voice anywhere, and it’d always bring a smile to my face without fail.

I rush to get up from my desk chair and open the window but when I do so, she’s no longer on the sidewalk. There’s only a car I recognize to be the one of the friend that drove her here during that nightmarish episode I explained earlier.

Before I can ever back away from the window, I hear my front door swing open and a yell echo from down the hall, “Corpse! How many times do I need to tell you to lock your door, damn it!”

“The same amount of times I’ve had to tell you to cut down on the al- WHOA!“ She doesn’t let me finish the sentence and jumps me the second I step out in the hallway.

“Missed you, stupid!“ She says, her legs wrapped around my waist as she ruffles my hair, “I’ll trim your hair later. Why have you let it get so long?“ She questions, furrowing her brows at me while running both her hands through my mess of a hair - she has a point, I’ve let it get out of control. While doing so, she seems to get an idea all of a sudden so she quickly climbs down, reminding me of the huge height difference we have now that her feet are on the floor. “I know you two have met before, but I think you need to re-meet...“ she says, turning to look at her friend who’s smiling timidly at her. She sends the flustered girl a wink before turning back to look at me, “Corpse, I’d like you to meet Abbey, my girlfriend“ she says proudly, skipping over to the blue haired girl and wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Y/N pushes up on her tiptoes and places a kiss on her girlfriend’s cheek. It’s adorable to see her shorter than yet another person she clearly adores to annoy.

I smile at the two girls, holding back a chuckle as to not embarrass Abbey more, “Well then, nice to meet you Abbey. You should know you are one strong soul to be putting up with all that.“ I purposely don’t look at Y/N as I motion towards her, earning me a pissed off “Hey!“ as a response to my remark, “Stick around for dinner, don’t worry neither of us will be cooking.“ I point at myself and then at Y/N as if to reassure her she won’t be a victim of food poisoning.

“Actually...“ Abbey says, tilting her head to look my shortie sister in the eyes as if taunting her to say something.

She finally caves, raising her left hand as though she’s volunteering, “Ugh fine, I may or may not have taken a cooking course and may or may not know how to cook a decent meal. It’s whatever, really.”

To say I’m impressed would be an understatement. I’m impressed, shocked, surprised and flooded with joy that my sister has finally decided to start maturing. “Cooking course, huh? When did you decide living off of takeout isn’t a nice way to live?”

She rolls her eyes at me, “Oh no I still go full weeks with only takeout and cereal, I just needed a distraction because...well...” she trails off, her gaze dropping awkwardly as she fishes for words or perhaps already has them found but doesn’t want to spit them out.

Abbey huffs, taking Y/N’s hand and lifting it to show off her wrist where I catch sight of a batch of colorful handmade bracelets, “Because these aren’t gonna earn themselves.”

I raise an eyebrow, puzzled as to what exactly she’s referring to.

Y/N sighs, taking one of the bracelets, playing with it nervously, “I have one for every month I’ve spent without getting drunk - Abbey made them for me. I need a distraction to stay sober so...I took up cooking.“

I can’t remember a moment I haven’t felt proud of my sister. Y/N’s always been on top of her shit, drunk or sober she knows what she’s doing. She’s mindful even when she’s reckless, thinks soberly even when she’s been drinking heavily. She’s always proved herself to me and to the people who think of her as a lowlife without even trying. She lets the world breeze by her without thinking too much of it and yet she still mesmerizes me and many of the people she meets - Abbey has now officially joined the club.

But, all things said and considered, I think I’ve never felt as proud of her as I do right now, seeing those six bracelets on her wrist - half a year without getting drunk. I know she wouldn’t lie to Abbey, she rarely lies to me too, so those bracelets have been earned and well-deserved and that makes me feel like the Y/N I remember is not the one standing in front of me right now. That silly girl is still in the suburbs, making a shitty-ass choice of messing up her liver. A grown woman, a responsible adult has taken her place though, and I couldn’t be more glad.

“Y/N...“ I finally manage to utter her name, making her gaze meet mine, “I’m so fucking proud of you.“

A smile slowly stretches the corners of her mouth upwards, her eyes shning in a way that has nothing to do with the lighting in this hallway. She’s not a crier though, I know those tears are gonna stay right there, stubbornly refusing to escape her eyes, “Thanks, Corpse. I’m proud of you too....” she says, nodding her head slowly, “I can overlook the untrimmed hair.”

Sigh

Y/N will always be Y/N no matter what I guess. That’s a good thing - I love her just the way she is.

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astaroth1357 · 4 years

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The Brothers as Angels of Virtue

My Brain: Stop thinking about the Angel!Brothers. The Angel!Brothers aren’t real. Like, they’re even less real than usual.

Me: But they are real!! *puts hand over heart* They’re real to me… in my heart…!

My Brain: “Your heart” ain’t in the canon but whatever, good luck with your delusions…

Me: Oh yeah?? Well I’ll show you, Brain!! I can FORCE this to work with the canon!!!

Brain: Nani!?!

Angel of Humility, Lucifer

Lucifer obviously wasn’t the first angel, Michael and Gabriel were there before him so those two had the most hand in “mentoring” him as he grew up.

Lucifer was always Michael’s favorite from the beginning. He was a very mild-mannered and studious kid from the get-go, even if he could be a bit blunt...

He seemed to always be willing to learn something new and even after he would all but master whatever he practiced, he’d never forget to give credit to the people who taught him along the way. His willingness to step out of the spotlight, despite his many talents, eventually earned him the virtue of “Humility.”

Lucifer was around his pre-teens when Mammon was finally created, slightly too old to be able to grow up with him super closely, but still young enough to be more approachable than Michael or the others when he needed help.

Lucifer loved little Mammon with all his heart and would try to give him advice when he could, but since Michael would keep him busy helping him on most days Mammon was left with little people to socialize with… at least until Levi came along anyway.

As time passed and he grew even older, more and more siblings became added to the family. Lucifer never ignored or forgot about a single one of them. While Michael and others concerned themselves more with the day-to-day work, he’d be the one to check in on everyone and be sure they were alright.

Michael would arrange for a lot of “family activities” while they were all still together and Lucifer would actually enjoy participating. He’d usually volunteer to be the person who’d help the youngest at the table learn how to play a game since he wasn’t very competitive himself. A lot of the goodwill his family still has for him comes from these kinds of memories… No matter what happened afterwards.

Angel of Charity, Mammon

Mammon came around a fair amount of time after Lucifer so he was the youngest angel for quite a while.

This led him to grow up a little… wilder than the others because he used to do things to get attention. Not big things, but like break a rule here or there to get people noticing you know?

Despite his “problem child” tendencies, no one ever considered Mammon a bad apple or anything. He probably had the most compassionate heart out of all the angels, the kind of kid who offers you one of their toys when they see you’re upset, you know?

As more siblings came into the picture, Mammon had a nasty habit of spoiling them silly. Especially Levi, who was much closer to his age, and ultimately got most of the toys when they would play together and gifts afterwards. Mammon’s selfless attitude towards giving gave him the virtue of “Charity.”

Over time, Mammon began to get more and more dissatisfied with how nice the lives of angels were compared to those of humans and he started making secret trips to the human world to help out the less fortunate. Since this was tiptoeing dangerously close to meddling with human lives, Lucifer was brought in to give Mammon a different outlet for his frustration...

Lucifer placed Mammon in the guardian angel program, allowing him to pick one human whom he could help as much as he liked, so long as he followed the rules. As it would turn out, Mammon took to guardianship swimmingly and stayed in the program right up until their eventual fall… and sort of afterwards too if you think about it.

Angel of Kindness, Leviathan

After Levi was made, Mammon was SO excited to have someone close to his age around that he became his main playmate.

Levi adored Mammon back then, the two were practically inseparable when they were young. The other angels would find them running around together, the more extroverted and lively Mammon leading the way for his his shy, but sweet brother in for whatever they were doing.

When Mammon would come up with any big project ideas, Levi would be the first person he’d ask to be his “partner-in-crime.” Unfortunately, it was still very much one of those “they’re a pair, but they have two braincells between them” kind of dynamics so things would always go south quick.

One day, Mammon was determined to make breakfast for all the other angels so Michael could take a break, so he pulled in Levi to help him. Because neither of them actually knew how to cook, the kitchen turned into a disaster and they both were covered in eggs and flour when Lucifer found them...

As Levi grew up, he more or less became of the unofficial helper and confidant to all the other angels, his siblings included. In time, because he was always so willing to lend a hand with everyone else’s projects, he became pretty skilled at a lot of things as a result. People eventually took note of Levi’s good-nature and named his virtue “Kindness.”

When Mammon started acting up more and more, the other angels would try to discourage Levi from associating with him as much but he’d always be the first to stick up for his older brother. No matter how much he bent the rules, he knew that he had a good heart and always meant well in the end. That, unfortunately, wouldn’t always hold true down the line...

Angel of Chastity, Asmodeus

There was another gap between Levi’s creation and Asmo’s so yet again there was a young angel without anyone their age to play with…

Unlike Mammon’s situation, however, Asmo was at least fortunate enough to have older brothers who understood what that felt like and tried their best to play with him when they could. Lucifer did this in particular because he was worried that Asmo could start acting out like Mammon had all those years ago...

Because of the extra attention, Asmo took to Lucifer very quickly. He saw him sort of how Luke sees Michael for quite a while and wanted to help him as much as he could. Sometimes people would even joke that Asmo was like his shadow, because the little angel would follow him around and mimic whatever he did.

Because they were together so much, Lucifer did a lot to shelter Asmo from the less savory things in life... It wasn’t so much out of prudence as it was brotherly concern for the boy, Mammon was still quarreling with him about the state of the human world and he didn’t want Asmo to go down a similar path... Due to this, Asmo had a very sheltered view on life and his perpetual wide-eyed innocence earned him the virtue of “Chastity.”

After he got a little older, he started wanting to find his own identity apart from Lucifer and that was around the time that the twins were made.

Though everyone adored the twins, Asmo loved them both most of all! He took on the role of their babysitter and wouldn’t hear anything to the contrary, though he was a much more relaxed guardian than Lucifer had been to him (mostly because he was just so soft for their cute little faces).

Angel of Temperance, Beelzebub

It was a big deal when the twins were created because it’s very rare for two angels to be made so close together, on the same day no less. Beel came first when the sun rose then Belphie second after it fell.

Asmo was ecstatic to have a younger sibling at last and all of the other brothers were equally delighted. Though Asmo did a lot of their babysitting, Beel was still more closely drawn to Lucifer whenever he would watch them. During those times, he would notice how tired Lucifer would be whenever he got to play with them… this would come to affect him later on.

The twins were always close to each other, naturally, but there were still big differences in their personalities even back then. Beel had always been known for his even-temper and awareness of both others and himself. If Mammon was the kid who’d give you his toys, Beel was the one to listen to your problems (even if he didn’t understand them, like at all).

From a young age, Beel would quietly watch those around him. The Celestial Realm was a demanding environment and a lot of angels had a good deal of work to do... Beel connected the dots that doing all this work all the time led to a lot of stress early on.

Being a caring soul, Beel used this knowledge to intervene when he saw his brothers getting overworked and helped remind them of their limits. This would apply especially to his twin (who was pretty much his patient zero) and Lucifer, who eventually grew to rely on Beel’s advice so much he made him part of his personal guard. His guidance and insight beyond his years eventually gave him the title of “Temperance.”

Though Beel was protective of everyone, Belphie often got most of his attention because of his tendency to push himself farther than he needed to. It was his desire to see his twin take more breaks that led him to asking Mammon if Belphie could start going to the human world and well… We know where that ends up.

Angel of Diligence, Belphegor

As the younger of the twins, all the other angels considered Belphie to be the baby of the family and treated him as such. Asmo adored him because he was just so cute, so he got coddled A LOT when compared to everyone else.

Belphie differed from his brother by being the more active of the two. While Beel would be comfortable to sit back and watch then lend a hand, Belphie always felt more better just getting up and doing whatever needed done himself, usually with a smile in the process. He would actually have to lean on Beel quite a lot because of this, since his twin could remind him to rest and take breaks.

Combine his cheerful attitude with his cute face and “baby brother” status and Belphie could always get away with quite a lot, even back then. Of all the boys, even Lucifer couldn’t bring himself to be too hard on him. That didn’t really become a problem until he got a little older though...

Beel was worried that Belphie wasn’t getting enough rest, so he convinced Mammon to start taking Belphie out with him when he went to the human world as a guardian angel. He figured that if Belphie was away from work, then he had to rest, right? Mammon agreed and that’s what sparked Belphie’s fascination with the human world to start with.

After getting to go a couple times, he would start working extra hard in order to suck up to Lucifer, Michael, or whoever he could so he could go again. When the other angels started getting concerned that he was spending too much time there, they tried to put a limit on it to keep him home. However, that just lead him to sneaking out and leaving notes for Beel on where to find him if people started noticing...

Beel tried his best to curtail his twin’s trips, but even he couldn’t really tell Belphie no when he needed to hear it. By the time Lilith came around, Belphie was already making regular trips there and back and well… That’s how the story goes.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphie #obey me headcanons #obey me imagines #obey me scenarios #obey me angels

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2-cute-4-school · 4 years

Text

𝘕𝘊𝘛 𝘋𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘬𝘪𝘥𝘴

requested by the lovely @m4rshm4llow (*ૂ❛ัᴗ❛ั*ૂ)

Mark Lee

i think mark is quite good with children too when he’s not frozen in awkwardness

but i wouldn’t trust with him alone with a kid for too long tbh

like i see him as someone who could probably entertain a kid for a couple of hours succesfully but taking care of them?? yeah no (˵¯͒ བ¯͒˵)

so let’s say he had to tag along with you to babysit because he didn’t want to waste any time he could spend with you *let my boy receive his love*

but he’s not thaaaat excited he just hopes that the kid will get K.O.-ed early in the night so he could have some alone time with you( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°).... TO CUDDLE ya nasties

so when you arrive at your cousin’s house and you come in

he surely DIDN’T expect a kid to literally throw himself onto you and cling to your legs while chanting your name o(*^▽^*)o

the only way you can get him to detach so you can walk is if you pick him up in your arms

“y/n, who’s he?” mark just stares at the chubby finger pointed at him and produces an *HIGHLY AWKWARD* smile like (*′☉.̫☉)

“oh this is mark, my boyfriend”

*silence* “ew”

now hold on rewind

did a kid just ‘ew’ at mark (｡☉︵ ಠ╬)

and then he had THE AUDACITY to cling to your neck while rambling about his new robot toy and mark had to THIRDWHEEL the entire night

now he’s sure you have superpowers how could you tame that!!??!?! even haechan could be considered mild in comparison to... this ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ

he’s pouty the entire evening while you play and take care of the newly spawned devil in town who HOGS your attention the entire time

so when he finally runs out of energy a bit later than mark would have hoped for, he’s quick to envelop you in his arms and drag you into a well deserved cuddle session ༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ

“what took you so looong?”

“sorry sorry, i had to look under his man for boogeyman”

“pffft i think boogeyman is the one looking under his bed for that kid”

but he does melt when he remembers the way your eyes sparkled as the child giggled excitedly on your lap while imagining himself in the picture too (๑°꒵°๑)･*♡

Huang Renjun

renjun as we all know is just a bit short tempered so i’m not sure where he stands in his relationship with kids 눈_눈

but also he brings up his younger cousins quite often and he seems very fond of them whenever he talks about them

so i guess he likes kids but like good kids ya know Σ(-᷅_-᷄๑)

so let’s say you’re shopping in like one of those bigger supermarkets

and you hear cries

your mother instincts literally GO OFF LIKE CRAZY

renjun doesn’t even have the time to blink before you’re dragging him in the direction of the noise with such precision you might as well have a radar at this point ᕕ༼✿•̀︿•́༽ᕗ

turns out a little girl was lost between the tall aisles

renjun is a lil bewildered cause what is he supposed to do? not like he’s tall enough to see other the aisles in his dreams maybe

but you seem to know EXACTLY what to do as you crouch down in front of the girl and speak to her so gently not even renjun can hear properly

and then as if nothing happened she stops crying

just like that so renjun decides to try his luck too o｜◕ˇ▽ˇ◕｜ツ

“come on, let’s go find mommy and daddy”

and lemme tell ya the little girl sprung into your arms and clung to you with everything she had as she mumbled into your neck

“i only wanna go with miss” (つ﹏<)･ﾟ｡

his eye twitched a lil ngl （；¬＿¬)

and that’s how you end up taking a stroll to the announcement desk with a whole child gripping onto your hand

renjun would have never imagined his grocery run to turn into this

he only wanted some damn carrots not a frickin child ಠ╭╮ಠ

thankfully it didn’t take long for the parents to run over and thank you for returning their child safely but there was only one problem left

getting her to let go of you

that was a whole ass dramatic goodbye

poor renjun was left exhausted after this he gave up any grocery run he intended to do and dragged you home pronto (ﾉTдT)ﾉ

he admires you so much for how you handled the situation and how you seemed to be so natural and in your element he can only think of how great of a mother you will be in the future with his beside you hopefully

Lee Jeno

one word, his greatest asset: PATIENCE

i see jeno as a man of patience which is more than just helpful when it comes to handling children ❀.(*´◡`*)❀.

he’s also volunteered in all these programs that involved children and he did really well if you ask me soooo he’s a good ally to have (︶.̮︶✽)

and you really REALLY want to volunteer together at one of those like emergency centres for children or something

and who is he to deny his love? he couldn’t have even if he wanted to, you’re too cute in his eyes so he lets you get your way anyway

so before you step inside one of the caretakers gives you some advice

warns you that the new kid, a little girl still in primary school, is still very closed off and wary of everyone

but as you step inside the kids get drawn to you like moths to a flame, swarming around you and asking you questions while dragging you in the living room to play with them

jeno just trails behind, watching the entire commotion with his soft eye smile as he understands (◍•ᴗ•◍)

he knows that you just have a way with people, he’s been in the same position mesmerized by you, it’s one of the reasons he loves you so much and seeing you so purely happy surrounded by children

MELTED HIM ♡(.◜ω◝.)♡

eventually you drag him into the happy circle too and he seems to fit in just right by your side with giggling children everywhere around you

he ends up using his muscly arms ᕙ[ ˵ ͡’ ω ͡’ ˵ ]ᕗ as swings

“hey!! i’m stronger than you!!! let’s have a fight!!!!”

you just giggle as you colour some pictures with a few kids but stare at your boyfriend from the corner of your eye

jeno is so simply happy and comfortable he doesn’t even notice when you disappear from the crowd at first

but when he does his eyes search wildly for you like a lost puppy Σ(ﾟﾛ､ﾟ;)

but then he spots you

curled up on a small couch in the corner of the room, deep in conversation with the new girl whose eyes seemed just a little brighter as you clutched her hand in yours warmly ｡ﾟ.(*´◡` )

and jeno just realises again

you’re just working your charm once again and once again jeno falls for you for the nth time, deeper than the last time and lighter than the next

Lee Donghyuck

this manchild right here smh ୧༼◔益◔୧ ༽

now don’t get me wrong i’m pretty sure he’s decent at least with children

given he has two younger siblings and he often talks about hanging out with his little brother also have you seen that vid with the little girl?? the was he talked to her ⊂（♡⌂♡）⊃

buuuut BUT he’s also DYING like a fish out of water without attention

so when he invites you to tag along to his hangout with his lil bro

he didn’t expect TO BE THE ONE THIRDWHEELING!!!! (╬ಠ益ಠ)

you keep feeding and pampering his brother who basks in your full attention half because he loves it half because he loves the annoyed look on hyuck’s face

“babe i want some kimchi too” (*ﾟ∀ﾟ*)

“oh!!! sure, i’m sorry for hoarding it all”

and as hyuck awaits with his eyes closed and his mouth open with a pleased smile

you plop a bowl of kimchi in front of him and turn back to his brother as he tugs on the sleeve of your shirt

hyuck, muttering to himself: ‘i should have left you home, you lil brat, both of you traitors!!!!!’ (ノTДT)ノ ┻┻

he pouts and sighs dramatically with crossed arms the entire night while watching you interact oh so sweetly with his little brother

but he can’t deny the warm feeling of fondness swarming is his chest seeing you get along so well with his family and being so genuinely happy when you’re with kids

still complains to you when he gets you alone

“i can’t believe you love my brother more than me!!! ME, YOUR SWEET LOVELY CUTIE BOYFRIEND!!!” ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

“first of all, i wouldn’t stretch it that far-” “how is that stretching-?!??!”

“i’m sorry i’m sorry, my sweet lovely cutie boyfriend, i just missed him, he’s so cute and i haven’t seen him in so long and he seems to grow so fast every time we meet” (oꆤ︵ꆤo)

NOW hyuck is real soft how can he be mad at you when you’re THIS ADORABLE AFSKSGDFSAF-

hyuck just presses a sweet smooch to your temple and mutters

“he only acts that cute with you, he’s a devil at home”

“sheesh, i wonder who he takes after” *pointed look* (￢ε￢　)

Na Jaemin

my man here will most likely compete with YOU for the CHILD’S attention

it’s like GAME OVER for him if a child rejects him ε-(≖д≖﹆)

he’s never gonna get over this betrayal from both sides

so let’s say he takes you with him when he offers to babysit a cousin or neighbour idk you get where i’m getting at

and he’s already ‘play buddies’ with him as jaemin likes to put it (,,꒪꒫꒪,,)

and you’re slightly acquitanced with him from a previous visit to jaemin’s house when you coincidentally met

so when jaemin opens the door and announces his presence LOUDLY, the little boy doesn’t waste A SECOND to waddle in the hallway and meet you both ლ(＾ω＾ლ)

and jaemin crouches to meet him midway and-

and he *swooshes* past jaemin and into your open arms while giggling

jaemin, a lonely man in the middle of a hallway: (ಥ⌣ಥ)

the entire day, your boyfriend tries to steal the kid’s attention or bribe him over with sweets or toys

now you’re wondering who the real brat is

is salty about the UTTER rejection but also can’t help but watch you both so fondly with a proud hopefully in future for real fatherly smile (*ૂ❛ัᴗ❛ั*ૂ)

“are you practicing, y/n?”

“pardon?”

“practice, are you practicing?”

“for...?” ∑（´△｀○）

“ya know” *wiggles eyebrows* “taking care of our future children”

“learn how to control your own brat at home read jisung first and THEN we can talk, jaemama”

jaemin can’t believe this low blow, how could you after everything he’s done: cooking for you, taking you on bike rides even though he was the one who wanted to, even buying pads!!! or even worse!!!!! STRAWBERRY YOGHURT!!!!!! ∑(ﾟ台ﾟlll

he’s still pouty as you all put on an animation and snuggle a blanket

but then!!!! you fall asleep with the little boy in your embrace

and jaemin!!!!! just!!! CAN’T!!! stay mad!!!!!! cause you’re both just SO absolutely irrevocably CUTE!!!!!! ♡( ૢ⁼̴̤̆ ꇴ ⁼̴̤̆ ૢ)~ෆ♡

so he just HAS TO lay a *meaningful* smooch on your forehead as he sleepily moves closer to you both, one arm wrapping loosely around you while the other caresses the child’s head, lulling the both of them to sleep his protecc instincts kicked in y’all

Zhong Chenle

he has already expressed his wish to have a family someday since he wants to live the same happiness his brother does with his own family

which i think is ABSOLUTELY PRECIOUS

and we all know he’s WHIPPED for his nephew ˞♡ฅ(ᐤˊ꒳ฅˋᐤ)

but unfortunately

that doesn’t necessarily mean he’s good with children yet

let me give you a context over here

so he’s left alone for a short while with his baby nephew which shouldn’t be too bad since technically chenle is an adult at least legally okay??

and right things are all good until BABY STARTS TO CRY i’m talking about the actual baby here although chenle might cry too at this point

and chenle just PANICS when he realises that just shushing won’t work and whacking a hand over his mouth *cough* like he does to jisung *cough* isn’t an option (╬⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾ Д ⁽⁽ ⁰ ⁾⁾)

but thankfully, you’re there!!!!!!

“may i?” you ask chenle as you stretch out your arms in his direction

chenle has never passed over anything faster in his entire life џ(ºДºџ)

so when you coddle the baby in your arms and just gently bounce him a little he just settles down so cutely and most important QUIETLY as he stares up at you with curious eyes, small fingers curling up around a necklace swung around your neck or just the fabric of your shirt

chenle is all like (๑•́o•̀๑)!!

HOW DID YOU JUST DO THAT!!!!

and he watches with eyes even more curious than his nephew’s eyes as the baby slowly dozes off peacefully in your arms (꒡ ω ꒡ )zzz

it just hits him just how natural the scene looks

he approaches carefully once he’s sure his nephew fell asleep and lays a gentle hand on your head as he peers down at the cute chubby baby face

“you’re a life saver, how did you even manage to do that?” ◎ܫ◎

“you know, i have to take care of you all the time so-”

he flicks your forehead faster than you can finish that sentence

way to ruin a moment (oT-T)

but *SIKEEE* the baby fusses a little as soon as you frown and chenle immediately freaks out

he showers the spot on your forehead with kisses and his nephew settles down once again as you smile at him proudly ໒( ͡ᵔ ▾ ͡ᵔ )७

chenle rolls his eyes as if he doesn’t wish for this scene to become familiar to him sometime in the future

Park Jisung

this chick is still a baby who barely hatched

so he’s still in CONSTANT WONDER of the world ༼ つ ◕o◕ ༽つ

and in this episode of ‘jisung the explorer’ he’s discovering... ACTUAL babies

so you were on a date at the local mall when you met with a family friend of your mom’s who was struggling with her fussy baby girl in a carrier while trying to shop for some baby products

so you offer to watch over the girl until her mom finishes up (•́⌄•́๑)૭✧

but just as you’re about to attach the baby carrier to yourself, an old woman asks for directions around the shop

so you pass the baby to jisung for literally a minute to show the lady the way └(>ω<。)┐

and jisung is HIGHKEY PANICKED

he holds the baby by the underarms at arms length and obviously she doesn’t enjoy that and just starts wailing in the middle of the shop

and people just... stare (,Ծ_Ծ,)

and jisung is all like ‘IT’S NOT MINE!!!!! AND I’M NOT STEALING OR MISTREATING IT EITHER!!!!!!’

the moment you’re back in his sight, he’s THRUSTING that tiny loud bald creature in your arms it’s a child jisung ║ * ರ Ĺ̯ ರ * ║

and he expects for you to panic too but right away

the baby quietens down as you cuddle her close to your chest and coo softly in a hushed baby voice

and she plays with your shirt while you glare at your boyfriend (눈_눈)

“y/n, you sorcerer, how did you just shut it off?”

“i didn’t ‘shut it off’, she’s a baby not a tape recorder”

“oh REALLY, i couldn’t tell the difference for a moment there”

you just might consider returning jisung and keeping the baby（ ಠωಠ）

he watches in wonder as you entertain the baby for the next few minutes until her mother comes back

and he swears his heart skips a beat when he sees your smile widen with tenderness once you get a small giggle out of the baby (*ฅ́˘ฅ̀*)

he supposes maybe she isn’t so bad since she makes you so happy

even though she was louder than even chenle which is an accomplishment at this point

and when jisung notices your slight pout once you gave the baby back and parted ways he makes sure to shower your face in kisses until you regain the same smile that made him fall so deep in love with you

547 notes · View notes

ravensbug · 4 years

Note

Kuvira x reader au where she gets a cat please. I'm a shameless obsesser. Of both.

Jinx

Fandom: Legend of Korra

Ship: Kuvira x reader

Request: Yes

Prompt: ^^^^

A/N: I absolutely love this idea so much. My heart can’t handle all the adorable thoughts that come to mind. You are a genius Anon. Thank you for giving me this gift of a story to write.

There you two were, in the animal shelter, picking out a pet. After almost three months of convincing, Kuvira finally gave in and said yes. She saw how you missed the cats from your parents since you two had moved in together. Getting one wouldn’t be so bad she thought. It would mostly spend its time with you, you had promised to take care of it, so there was no reason for it to ever really bother her at home.

You were weaving your way around little kids whose parents had brought them to also get a pet. Most of them were looking at dogs anyway. Not that you didn’t like dogs, but you couldn’t exactly have one in an apartment.

When you got to the cats your eyes lit up. There were so many, and if it were up to you then you would take them all. But you promised Kuvira only one cat, for now.

You read each paper of every cat you walked by, looking for one that you knew would be perfect for the two of you. You knew if Kuvira would ever have gotten a pet by herself that it would have been a cat. Graceful and nimble, just like her. Also affectionate.

You probably spent a little too much time looking at each and every cat because a volunteer walked up to you.

“Looking for anything in particular?” he asked. You looked away from the cat that you were reading about.

“Kind of? I guess one that can handle being by itself, but also will be able to handle other cats in the future,” you shrugged. You felt Kuvira glare at you, but not in an angry way. It would be a long time before she thought about getting another cat.

“You should look at some of the younger cats then. Most of those are rescued from kitten mills or found abandoned at the sides of roads. They usually come in groups, but the cats seem to do fine on their own as well.” He talked as he directed you to the section of younger cats. You noticed now that some of them were pens together. The older cats were always by themselves.

The little meows of the younger cats tugged at your heart. The age differences were fairly big, there were old cats and cats who probably should still be with their mother. Your eyes landed on one of the pens in the back. You learned from your years of adopting cats that they put the ones that were less likely to be adopted there.

In one of those pens sat a small black kitten, maybe six months old. You looked at the papers, seeing the kitten didn’t even have a name. At this point your mind was made up. You knew the poor thing would be here for the rest of her life if you didn’t take her. Black cats were almost never adopted.

“This one.” you pointed at the kitten. She walked up to you since you had gotten there and attempted to sniff your hand.

“Are you sure?” Kuvira asked.

“I’m sure.” You looked up at Kuvira. She wasn’t going to second guess you again.

Kuvira had been over your parent's house plenty of times before you moved in with her to know that you liked all kinds of cats. Your parents currently had four cats. Two of them were Calicos, being brother and sister. One was a Maine Coon, who was the ‘mom’ of the group. The last one was a black cat, who was basically yours since he spent most of his time with you. Kuvira should have known that because of which cat you spent the most time with that you would choose one that looks like him.

“I’ll get the papers then. Another volunteer will get a carrier ready for her so you can take her home.” The volunteer walked off. You knew to meet him back at the front desk, as this was the same shelter your parents got the two Calicos at. Kuvira followed along, occasionally looking at some of the cats herself. This made you smile a little knowing she wasn’t completely disinterested in the idea of a cat.

You two waited a few minutes for the volunteer to come with the adoption papers. You smiled as you saw the excited kids leaving with their new companions. It was the best feeling in the world, to get a new friend who would love you just as much as you loved them. Even if they would be gone long before you would be.

“Just sign on the marked lines, pay the fee and you’re good to go!” The volunteer handed you a pen so you could sign the papers. In your opinion, you didn’t like the fact that you had to pay to adopt an animal, but you knew it was how the shelters stayed running. If it were up to you, you would have the government put funding into the shelters so they could afford to not have fees for adoption.

“Perfect,” the man smiled. “I’m glad she’s getting a home. She was the last one from her litter left,” he explained. It hurt your heart that whoever had adopted her siblings decided to leave her there on her own.

Another volunteer came out with the kitten in a carrier. You could see she was scared, but you knew that most cats were scared during and right after adoption. Kuvira was the one who took the carries from the volunteer, careful to keep it as steady as possible. You had never seen Kuvira so attentive to each and every movement she made. It was different from her dancing, even though the basic idea of precise movement was the same.

When you two finally got back to your apartment you were so giddy to let the cat out. Kuvira adored this side of you, so happy and excited, even if she wouldn’t say it out loud. Not that you hadn’t been happy since you moved in together, this was a happiness that was beyond that. It made Kuvira a little jealous.

Kuvira gently placed the carrier down on the floor in the living room. You were already sitting on the floor, having done this situation plenty of times. You motioned for Kuvira to sit next to you, which she thought was ridiculous. She wasn’t going to spend much time with the cat so what was the point of her joining you. The look you gave her made her give in, but only to make you happy.

Kuvira opened the cage with her metal bending and you two waited patiently for the cat to come out. She walked out of the carrier slowly, eyeing her surroundings for anything dangerous. Once she saw nothing except for you and Kuvira she finally came out of the carrier. Apparently, the small time of interaction with her at the shelter made an impact. She walked over to the both of you with caution.

You were the first to reach your hand out. You placed it on the floor, to make yourself seem less threatening. The cat stood still at first before coming up to sniff your hand. She didn’t have any problems with you so now it was Kuvira’s turn.

You grabbed Kuvira’s arm and placed it down on the floor like yours had been. You can tell how tense she is. She never did this with the other cats, them being adults and all. They just looked at her and didn’t really mind whenever she came over to your parent's house.

“Just relax,” you chuckled. You telling her to relax seemed to work a little, but she was still nervous.

The cat moved over to sniff Kuvira’s hand. It took its time, longer than it had with you, and that worried Kuvira. If the cat didn’t like her how would that make you feel? She at least wanted the cat to be fine with her.

When the cat rubbed her head against Kuvira’s hand you both were in shock. You put your hands in front of your face and you couldn’t stop grinning. Kuvira was frozen with the cat still rubbing her head on Kuvira’s hand. You thought this moment was ironic and perfect. The cat meowing at Kuvira just made it even better.

“She wants you to pet her,” you said, still grinning from ear to ear.

Kuvira moved her hand so she could pet the cat. She was still hesitant even though the cat clearly liked her. She had never been known as a fragile or soft person and this cat was exactly that. When she finally started petting it, that little bit of fear went away.

“Have you thought of a name?” Kuvira asked while petting the cat.

“I was thinking Jinx,” you smiled.

Kuvira raised an eyebrow at you. The name was cliche but you loved it anyway. Kuvira didn’t really care what you named the cat. It was more yours than it was hers anyway.

As the weeks went on you spent more time bonding with Jinx. She finally warmed up to you and loved playing with you when you had the time. Working from home really helped the bond. She often curled up next to you or even on you while you were working. Those were the moments you missed from home.

What was even better, in your opinion, was that whenever Kuvira was home Jinx would follow her everywhere. Sometimes it got on Kuvira’s nerves, especially when she would turn around and almost trip over Jinx. You always thought it was the cutest thing in the world. You eventually decided to get Jinx a collar with a small bell, so Kuvira could hear whenever the cat was behind her. She never outright thanked you for that, because that would mean telling you the cat was annoying her.

Weeks turned into months and Kuvira finally took some time off of work. You were grateful that you could spend more time with your girlfriend now. Spending time with Jinx was nice and all, but being with Kuvira was nicer.

Because of her time off Kuvira started to do more things around the apartment. One of your favorites was when she would make dinner for the two of you. She had picked up a few things from the chef back when she lived with Su. You didn’t expect her to be a good cook because you knew all of Su’s kids were horrible at it.

One particular night, when she was cleaning up after you two had finished, Jinx was sitting patiently next to her in the kitchen. Kuvira hadn’t seen her do this before so she was slightly confused. You looked over from your spot on the couch and laughed.

“What?” Kuvira asked.

“She wants a piece of the chicken,” you told her.

“I’m not giving her a piece. She’ll learn to expect it every time we have it.” Kuvira looked over at you. You had a sheepish grin on your face, telling her why Jinx was sitting there so patiently.

“You’ve been giving her some before haven’t you?” She asked.

“Maybe.” You looked away. You had given her a few pieces every once and a while either when you were putting the leftovers away or giving Jinx her own dinner.

“Look at her, sitting so nicely. How can you deny that face?” you pouted. You heard Kuvira sigh and knew she gave in.

“Fine. But stop doing it so often.” Kuvira pointed at you with the knife she was using to cut up the remaining chicken.

“I can make no promises,” you smiled. You would try, but as you said, who could deny that face.

When Kuvira finished in the kitchen she joined you on the couch. You sat there with Kuvira’s arms wrapped around your waist. You loved it when she got time off of work. She loved it more than you did because sometimes work got to be too much. Coming home to you was the best part of her day. With the addition of Jinx in the house, she had become more accustomed to the cat coming up to greet her whenever she got home.

Jinx had hopped up on the couch while you two were snuggling and decided to climb on Kuvira’s lap. You heard her sigh, but she refused to move from her position. You looked down at Jinx, who had now curled up on Kuvira’s lap, and smiled.

“Y’know, she really likes you. Like more than she likes me,” you explained.

“How, she’s your cat. I’m also not home as often as you are,” Kuvira argued.

“I think that’s why. She doesn’t see you as often so she misses you. Plus she warmed up to you way faster than she did with me.” You knew more about cat behavior than she did. You also knew more about how people dealt with cat behavior more than she did.

“Pretty sure you like her more than you’re willing to admit,” you smiled.

“I tolerate her,” Kuvira mumbled.

“Which is why you’re letting her sleep on your lap and why you let her sleep on your side of the bed?” you smirked.

“She’s not as bad as I thought she would have been,” Kuvira admits. That’s what you were looking for.

“Well, I’m glad you like her.” You moved your hand to pet Jinx’s head. She meowed and stretched out across Kuvira’s lap. You heard Kuvira sigh, but that didn’t stop you from petting Jinx.

Kuvira eventually moved from holding you to sit up carefully, so as to keep the cat where she was. When she was done with that she gently picked up Jinx and held her in her arms. Jinx began to purr even though Kuvira wasn’t even petting her.

That image will forever be in your mind. It was perfect in every way. This is what home means to you.

#kuvira #kuvira/reader #kuvira x reader #kuvira legend of korra #cat #adoption

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tchallasbabymama · 3 years

Text

M’Baku’s Love-Chapter 1

Hey y’all, sooooo this is inspired by Sylvie’s Love. It was such a sweet movie that made me feel all the feels, so I felt the need to write a love story for our Thicc Kang. Seriously, go watch it on Prime if you can. Let me know what y’all think, and check out my masterlist if you haven’t already! I have a few one shots and a series for both our king and our prince.

This one’s on the shorter side, but enjoy!

Word count: 2992

When M’Baku integrated the Jabari into the rest of Wakandan society he had some concerns about there being some cultural friction. Having been separated for centuries, M’Baku assumed his people would have a hard time with adjusting to the new union, but as it turned out he didn't have to worry. Above all, he was worried about lowland Wakandans possibly subjecting his people to their prejudices, but it turned out that they have a pretty similar society to the Jabari and they meld really well. The different tribes of Wakanda all live in their separate provinces and have their own ways of living just like the Jabari, the only difference being that they interacted with the larger community that included the rest of Wakanda as well.

The chief’s misconceptions and prejudices about the other Wakandans were soon wiped out and replaced with a love of his country. The whole of it, as opposed to just his domain. He even began to enjoy his trips to the city, still finding the advancements unnecessary but amazing nonetheless. Over time, he grew curious of the outside world after befriending Prince N’Jadaka. The prince would regale him with horror stories of life on the outside, some were personal others were from around the diaspora.

However, M’Baku still couldn't understand the outside world, so King T’Challa decided it would be best if he get to experience it for a while. At first, he was against it. Why would he want to experience such a horrible place? After much effort, T’Challa was able to convince him to spend three months in Oakland at the Outreach Center. At first, M’Baku thought the time span was excessive. He was Chief of the Jabari and had important duties to attend to, after all, he couldn’t just go galavanting halfway across the world just because he couldn’t grasp the concept of white supremacy.

M’Baku made his way through the hallways of the royal palace and when he arrived at the large ornate door to the king’s office, the guards saluted him before parting and letting him pass. He raised his fist to knock when T’Challa spoke up from inside.

“Enter.”

M’Baku cautiously opened the door and looked at the king with confusion written all over his chiseled face.

“How did you-”

“The heart shaped herb gives me enhanced hearing among many other things. Come, sit down. How has the tour been so far?”

In addition to his time in the outside world, M’Baku had chosen to learn more about the tribes of Wakanda. He had spent one weekend a month with a different tribe to understand their way of life. He only just started but so far the river tribe was in the running for second favorite.

“It is going well, umhlobo wam. You all are not too different from Jabari, aside from the frivolous gadgets.”

T’Challa smiled at his stubborn friend’s unwillingness to accept their technology. Getting him to wear Kimoyo beads was harder than bathing a cat, but he eventually came around but only for communication purposes. Some Jabari, especially the younger ones took right to it, but most were still living their traditional lives.

“I noticed the same thing when I stayed with you...the second time, clearly.”

The two chuckled at the now fond memory of the king almost dying at the hands of his newly beloved cousin.

“Clearly. So have you decided on a departure date yet?”

“Yes, I will be leaving with you and staying for about a week to check on the centers myself and help you acclimate. Obviously N’Jadaka will be there as well but I figured you’d want someone with you that’s a little more…”

“Level headed?”

“N-, well, yes, but also no. He is doing well at the Center, but he is still...himself.”

The prince was a wildcard. One you want to have in your hand, but a wildcard nonetheless. M'Baku needed someone with a slightly longer fuse and a calmer disposition to show him around.

“Well I would not have it any other way, he is quite entertaining at times.”

A grin creeped up the king’s face as he thought of how his cousin’s progress had allowed for the parts of personality that aren’t rooted in anger to shine through.

“I agree. So, since I’ll be accompanying you we have to leave tomorrow.”

“I will alert my council.”

——————

The heat in California was marginally better than Wakanda, but still too high for M’Baku’s liking. He would have preferred to visit in the middle of their winter when the temperatures were milder, but anything over 60 degrees felt like a sauna to him. He also wasn’t used to having so much unprotected skin showing, but the weather called for his arms and legs to be free from fabric. His size and physique made him hyper visible and he noticed several of the volunteers doing double-takes as he and T’Challa walked through the halls of the Wakandan Outreach Center. He knew some of the attention was because the king didn’t visit often, but when he would catch eyes lingering on him he’d smirk and keep on moving.

T’Challa took him on a tour of the Center that ended with N’Jobu’s memorial in room 1401, which was preserved like a museum exhibit. The room stood as a reminder of Wakanda’s dark past, and a promise to never repeat it. M’Baku walked around the memorial, silently paying his respects to the murdered Wakandan prince and taking in the scene. The small plaques around the room gave visitors information about Prince N’Jobu, his family, his mission, and his death.

“Why did you go with these instead of virtual pages? Or whatever they are called...” M’Baku asked.

“Holograms. I felt it would take away from the feeling of heaviness this room invokes on you when you enter. This memorial needs to be both seen and felt for it to be effective.”

M’Baku nodded slowly, eyes still roaming around the room.

“Come, my friend,” T’Challa clapped him on the shoulder. “You will have plenty of time to come back here if you wish. For now, let me show you to your office.”

“Office?” The two walked down yet another hallway and headed up to the top floor.

“Yes, you didn’t think this was a vacation did you?” The king chuckled.

“Well, no but I assumed it would be more study than work.”

“It is both. You will be our Jabari Ambassador while you are here. I would like for you to come up with a skillshare program that will allow for the kids here in Oakland to learn your ways. One of the purposes of our Outreach Center is to bring about cultural understanding between us and our diaspora siblings, who we are now referring to as the Lost Tribe at the prince’s request. For now, we just have Oakland but eventually I plan to expand the program. Shuri is over the STEM program, Nakia handles social outreach, and N’Jadaka keeps the whole thing running smoothly, and you will make sure the Jabari are represented in our curriculum.”

“It would be my honor to bring Jabari ways to the Lost children.”

“I’m glad, now here is your office,” T’Challa pointed to a corner office with floor-to-ceiling windows and a view of the bay. “It is not a throne room, but it is quite nice.”

The king then took the time to show him the basic technology he would need to use and some of the more advanced technology at his disposal he knew he would probably never touch.

“You will have plenty of time to settle in tomorrow, for now I will show you your apartment,” T’Challa led the way back through the center and out to the car which took them about 10 minutes away to an apartment building.

“Our buildings are much more impressive,” M’Baku remarked.. It warmed T’Challa’s heart to hear his friend refer to Wakanda proudly instead of just his own corner of the country, and he let out a chuckle. Things really can change…

“I completely agree, my friend.”

The apartment turned out to be a loft that was the perfect size for the large Jabari Chief. The high ceilings, the open space, the floor to ceiling windows, the exposed brick...M’Baku actually liked it.

“Worthy of a chief?” T’Challa asked.

“That it is,” M’Baku said, walking around and taking in the space. The restaurant style kitchen was fully stocked with all his vegetarian favorites and some soon to be new favorites as well. He picked up a square package and stared at it in confusion, never having seen the meat-substitute before. “What is this to-fu?”

“It’s a very popular protein source made from soybeans.”

M’Baku nodded then moved to the living space, surprised to see a television, but the king explained he would need to stay up on current events, or maybe even watch a movie every now and then.

When T’Challa showed him the thermostat, he was so ecstatic he immediately put it on the lowest setting.

“I should leave before you freeze me out. If you need anything I’m just a kimoyo bead aw-,” T’Challa cut himself off when another, more important thought occurred to him. “Oh, I forgot to mention you’ll be getting an assistant. I sent three files to your beads, take a look and hire whichever one fits you best”

“Thank you, brother.” The two shook hands and saluted each other before the king left to give M’Baku his space.

The chief admired the Jabari wood furniture and the furs on the couch, plopping down to try to figure out how to work the television. After some time, he found a news station and only lasted about 5 minutes before he needed to turn it off. Instead, he accidentally switched to a thing called HBO Max and clicked on a show where the main character looked familiar somehow.

“In West Philadelphia, born and raised,” the theme song played over and over and over as M’Baku binged his first tv show, laughing the whole way.

A few hours passed and he was brought back from tv land by a rumble in his stomach. Not in the mood to cook, he decided to explore the neighborhood and look for food instead.

After just a few minutes M’Baku came to a stop in front of a place called Cafe V. He stopped to take a look at the menu in the window when he felt a small, or regular sized, person bump into his side. His eyes travelled down to see who would dare shove Lord M’Baku, Chief of the Jabari, when his eyes landed on a caramel-complected goddess with a bright teal fade. His face immediately softened as she stammered through an apology.

“I-I am so s-sorry, I wasn’t paying attention. I got a text and, it doesn’t matter, are you ok?”

He struggled to find the words.

“Yes, are you? That was quite the impact.”

She was surprised by his kindness and gave him a smile.

“It was, wasn’t it?” The two shared a quick laugh. “I’m sorry, I’m running late to meet a friend...literally.”

“Well I would not want to keep you, but please be mindful of your surroundings. I am sure everyone is not as nice as I am.”

“That’s for sure. Oh, and by the way,” she leaned in as if to tell him a secret. He leaned in to listen to whatever she had to tell him. “There’s a Black-owned vegan restaurant around the corner there.”

M’Baku’s eyes lit up, “Two things I love.”

“Black people and vegan food?”

“Precisely,” a grin overtook his face and she couldn’t help but stare at his adorable gap.

“Well I really have to go, nice meeting you stranger!”

And with that, she was off before he could even get her name. The best he could do is hope she’d crash into him on the sidewalk again one day.

“I really hope she is more careful,” he said to himself as he rounded the corner to The V Spot.

——————

Monday morning, M’Baku arrived at the outreach center full of nervous energy. He had wanted to look nice for his first day, but his tunic felt like it was cutting off his circulation the closer he got to the building. When he finally arrived in his office, he found it full of royals.

“Nigga you look uncomfortable as hell in that,” N’Jadaka was, naturally, the first to call out the obvious. Thankfully, the Queen came to his rescue.

“Stop it Daka, you’d look uncomfortable in Jabari attire,” Nakia said as she undid his top button. “There. Better?”

“Much. I did not want to ruin the look.”

“Turning blue ruins the look, genius,” Princess Shuri chimed in.

“Sister, he wasn’t blue...yet. If we hadn’t gotten here when we did the Jabari would’ve been out a Chief,” the king added.

“Ha. You all are very funny. Are you done?”

“We’re just fucking with you, man. How you liking the loft?”

“It is wonderful. I am almost embarrassed to say I have watched the television for several hours. Have you ever seen the Fresh Prince of Bel Air? It is hilarious!”

“Aw hell yeah, that’s like thee funniest show hands down. You know what? While you’re here, I’m introducing you to alllllll the Black entertainment. You’re gonna love it, niggas stay laughing at something.”

“Speaking of, I thought… that word-“

“You can say nigga. You’re a nigga too, my nigga.”

T’Challa leaned over to M’Baku, “It is an adjustment, but the reclaiming of slurs can be a powerful thing for oppressed peoples. And it’s just so versatile.”

“What an interesting language…”

“Are we teaching an English class or are we meeting about curriculum…?” Shuri asked impatiently before her brother pinched her arm.

“Ouch! I’m telling mother.”

“Go ahead, I’ll tell her you’ve been sneaking out at night to hang with your little friends.”

Shuri shot her cousin a deadly glare, making him put his hands up in surrender.

“I didn’t say shit. He’s a walking lie-detector, I don’t know what to tell you.”

Nakia and M’Baku snickered at the situation they had no part in. Nakia, because she knew her husband had known for quite some time and would never snitch on his baby sister, but always had Dora following her at a safe distance. M’Baku enjoyed the moment because he and the Princess had a love-hate relationship and seeing her in “trouble” tickled him.

The moment passed and the five of them moved to a conference room to discuss the upcoming summer. Shuri advocated for a nanobots workshop on weekends and Nakia laid out her plans for summer programs. The king and prince listened closely and N’Jadaka gave his input here and there. T’Challa mostly nodded along, as this was more so his cousin’s job than his. He just signs the checks.

“...and Monaé just hired three new dance instructors because our classes are so popular with the community. She’ll discuss it in the Department Head meeting later-“

“Is that not what this is?” M’Baku asked, genuinely confused.

“If anything this is more of an executive meeting. We each oversee our departments, but have help running them. That’s who we will meet with in about 15 minutes.” Nakia responded, checking her beads for the time.

The executives finished their meeting just as other people started to roll in. Kitchen staff brought up some breakfast for everyone, and as soon as M’Baku stood to grab a bagel his knees nearly buckled. There she was, Miss In A Hurry herself. He tried to play it cool and keep his smile under wraps, but when she caught sight of the blinding whiteness from the other side of the room she recognized him immediately and waved.

“Friend of yours…?” T’Challa asked quietly with a raised brow. The man had only been here 24 hours…

“She ran into me on the street the other day and recommended an amazing restaurant. I should go say thank you…”

“Yes you should...why aren’t you?”

“I-“

“Mhm,” T’Challa said before turning to the rest of the attendees. “Everyone, please welcome Lord M’Baku, Chief of the Jabari. He will be here the next three months integrating Jabari culture into our curriculum. As many of you know, the Jabari-“

M’Baku tuned T’Challa out, staring instead at the girl with the teal fade. The look on her face when the king introduced him made him want to go hold her. It was painstakingly obvious that she was embarrassed to have almost run over royalty.

“-until we started the integration process a year ago. Now, Lord M’Baku you may have the floor.”

M’Baku cleared his throat and shook himself from his daydream.

“Uh, hello. I am sure it will be a pleasure to work here with you all. I would like to meet with each department head at some point this week to discuss how to make your programs more inclusive of Jabari customs. We can start scheduling those after we are finished here.”

The meeting went on for about an hour with M’Baku and the department heads furiously taking notes. M’Baku was pleasantly surprised that he wasn’t the only one using a physical notepad and pen. He looked to the stranger from earlier and noticed her bright notebook with a multicolored neon leopard cub in the middle. The name on the side read “Lisa Frank”, but he wasn’t sure if that was her name or the artist. She used several different colored pens to take her notes, and the red cat eye glasses he didn’t see on her face the other day kept slipping down her nose. She was a colorful one, that was for sure.

By the time the meeting ended he still hadn’t caught her name, but he knew she was head of the Arts department and that he would meet with her the next day. He could wait until then.

Next Chapter

#cecewritessometimes #black panther fic #sylvie's love #m'baku #m'baku x oc #black!oc #thicc king

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borosarrowman · 3 years

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The Matriarch- a poem for International Women's Day

On a day to honor women and all their wonderful feats

There is one woman I can think of that in my heart will never be beat

Although it is not her name, The Matriarch is she

One who's led our family and allowed to just be

She was born in the time before the stock market crashed

The Roaring Twenties abounded

Learned to live in with little (but make it a lot) as time passed

And in her life joy surrounded

She was a cornerstone of her church, a devout woman outright

Her influence often was something that was out of sight

She worked hard and sought to please the people around

And of the people who grew to know her, felt her love abound

In her first marriage she grew a family, four siblings (two and two)

Two eldest were the daughters, the younger- brothers through and through

The youngest had some special needs, but she fought for him to be

Treated like the rest of them, not excluded but included, fair and free

Sorrow was woven into this family, as both father and youngest died

But The Matriarch held strong for her family, and kept them by her side

As her children grew she did remarry, a new family evolved

And as they reached adulthood, all three looked for problems to be solved

The Matriarch continued to be a servant leader, in church, volunteer work, the rest

Her efforts supported not only the church, but her community, she always did her best

A kind soul with words of wisdom, and at a time a spry in her steps

She’d volunteer at the hospital to help those in distress

Eventually her children would find their lovers and marry off they did

And soon The Matriarch had a new name, a grandmother to little kids

That’s when I met The Matriarch, older but still in her prime

There are so many memories that I hold in my heart sublime

She always was there to listen, help, or give a hand

The inspiration of my life, a welcoming person who could always understand

And you’d never go home hungry

(unless that was your plan)

As I got older she was my confidant, wise counselor indeed

She’s the reason I am who I am today, source of much of my creed

She was the benefactor of my music, often letting me sit for hours to play

When I wanted to just let the music whisk me off for a bit and carry me away

As the years have gone by and by, her memory has begun to slow

But I still know The Matriarch is the woman I love and know

She may not be able to cook as much or listen for too long

But she’s always happy to see me when I stop by or when I sing her a song

When she does cross that river, and The Matriarch goes to final home

I know she’ll be christened to sainthood, for all the love and kindness she did hone

I love my grandma dearly, The Matriarch is she

And I couldn’t think of a better woman to follow, I hope some of you agree

After the poem thoughts

-I was inspired by the fact that today is International Women's Day. My grandmother may have not been a worldshaker back in the day, but the efforts she made and the example of who she is has always inspired me. I don’t think I have met a kinder soul than her. So, if you have reached the end of this post, I thank you and encourage you to share women in your life that have made a difference.

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hiddlestonsbabygirl · 5 years

Text

Let It Snow (Steve x reader) part one

In which (Y/N)’s cousin, Bucky, comes home for the holidays with a friend along and decided to stay for Christmas Eve when a heavy snow storm hits home.

Contains: cousin!Bucky, fluff

Note: Hey guys! So this is my first story here on Tumblr and I think this is gonna be a long one, so there will be a few parts. For now I give you my first one so, I hope you’ll like it!

...

It was only two days left before Christmas and everyone at home was already buzzing. Every Christmas the whole family comes home and spends the holidays together. And by family, meaning your cousins, uncle and aunts, grandparents, practically everyone. Your mom was scurrying from room to room getting all the beds ready while your dad cleared out the front yard from the heavy snow last night with a little help from your younger brother. Your older sister, Christina, was in the kitchen getting dinner ready. According to your cousins, they were arriving tonight to help get ready for Christmas Eve. And with that you were excited, not just for the fun you were going to have with your family, but you were once again going to get a sweet taste of your aunt’s infamous pudding, your banter and laughs with your cousins, but above all, you were most excited for Bucky, your cousin whom you haven’t seen for almost three years already. Bucky joined the army and he was busy for a few years, not having to come home for the holidays, or at least most of the days. You didn’t communicate much with him because they only had limited time to use phones and you were also busy with college. Now that he was on break from work until they were being called in again, he was home and just in time for Christmas, too.

You checked the clock mounted on your room and saw that it was already six, and in less than an hour your family would arrive any time soon. You leave your bed, taking one long stretch, your muscles relaxing after being curled up underneath your covers for hours. You take a quick shower and threw on a pair of jeans and a cream-colored sweater before walking—more like skipping—down the stairs and going straight to the kitchen where you can smell the roasted chicken and mashed potatoes wafting through the air. It felt like it was already Christmas Eve.

“Some dinner you’re whipping up, huh?” You told your sister, eyeing the meal that was laid out on the kitchen counter, still to be laid out on the table where dinner will be held.

“Yeah, well, it’s always special when the family comes around.” Christina replied with a grin, putting down the last plate of mashed potatoes she just finished cooking. With a relieved sigh, she happily stared at her finished work, happy to be done what with hours of being concealed in the kitchen, making sure to have the perfect dinner.

“Help me set them up?” She asked, taking a plate of roasted chicken before making her way to the dining room and you followed suit, taking two in both your hands to make work quicker.

Once you both finished putting the dishes, you set the table with red and white clothings, bringing out the candelabra your mother always used to design the table for Thanksgiving and Christmas. You lined up the silver kitchenware, making sure they were perfectly aligned and in their proper places. Your sister began placing the champagne glasses on the table and with one last fix on a crumpled napkin, the table was already set.

“Wow, the table already looks like it’s ready for Christmas Eve.” You commented, pleased with the work you and your sister have done.

“We’re gonna make the set up look even better for Christmas.”

That’s when the doorbell rang. You checked the time on your phone and it was already seven, surprised that the time went by fast when you were working on the table with Christina.

“I’ll get it!” You volunteered, dusting off your sweater with any filth that might have stuck on to your clothes before running to the door. You quickly opened it, and you were then greeted by a whole family in front of you wearing coats and hats while the snow continued to fall.

“Uncle Rob! Aunt Jenna! Everyone! Hi!” You were too excited to even form a coherent sentence, letting them all in just as your parents and siblings got to the door to greet them with you.

You all exchanged warm hugs and excited laughs, already met each of your cousins, but there was still that specific someone you’ve been dying to see again.

As if on cue, Bucky comes inside all wrapped up in thick coats and a scarf around his neck and mouth and you didn’t waste another second to run up to him and give him the tightest hug. He was caught by surprise but when he realized it was you, he let out a chuckle before wrapping his arms around you just as tightly.

“Buck, I’ve missed you,” you breathed out, still hugging the life out of him.

“I’ve missed you more (Y/N). It’s been too long.”

“I know.” And you hugged him even tighter (if that was still even possible) as you felt a few tears leave your eyes, letting your head rest against his shoulder.

After a few more moments he gently let go, his hands still holding on to your shoulders at arms-length. He stared you up and down with a grin, shaking his head almost in disbelief. “Look at you now, I’ve been gone for three years and you’re so tall already!”

You preened at his compliment and shrugged, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. “Yeah, well, in a few more I could be just as tall as you are.”

But you both know you were joking. The man was literally six feet and you were proud enough to have reached 5’5. Well, almost 5’5. But what difference does it make?

“Oh! That reminds me!” Bucky exclaimed suddenly, loud enough for everyone to hear. Everyone stopped what they were doing to face him, waiting for what he was about to say.

“I almost forgot to tell you guys that my friend from work will be staying with us for the night.” He announced, taking a step to the side to reveal a blonde man just as tall as him standing shyly and unsure.

But he took your breath away.

He was beautiful. Perfectly-cut blond hair, blue eyes, thin pink lips, and cheeks flushed from the cold outside. He wore a thick brown jacket and a blue scarf that matched with Bucky’s wrapped loosely around his neck and tight jeans that hugged his legs perfectly.

“This is Steve Rogers. We work together in the army and he was supposed to go home today but bus liners stopped their operation for the day due to the bad snow storm. He’ll be leaving first thing tomorrow to spend the holidays with his family, but for now he’ll be waiting out the snow with us.” Bucky explained all in one breath, as if he had practiced what he was about to say. “If that’s okay, of course.”

Your mom was the first one to speak. “But of course darling! You’re welcome here anytime.”

She went up to him and held out her hand for a handshake and Steve took it with a smile. “Make yourself at home. Mi casa es tu casa.”

You rolled your eyes half-heartedly at your mom who was obviously trying to impress a visitor. More specifically, a hot and handsome visitor. And you don’t often get a visitor like that at home, let alone stay the night.

“Say, Buck, why don’t you introduce me to your friend later, hm?” You overheard your sister talk with Bucky behind you.

You fought the urge to roll your eyes again.

Bucky laughed behind you. “Of course. I’m gonna introdce him to the cousins later, anyway.”

“No, I mean, introduce me to him alone. If you know what I mean...”

You sighed, shaking your head in disbelief and decided to just head to the dining room instead. You love your sister, you really do, but sometimes when she sees someone she likes that she thinks she stands a chance, she’d do anything to get that guy’s attention. And somehow her target now was Steve.

...

Dinner was finally over and you were stuffed already. The family was in the living room talking and spending some quality time, and from your spot in the kitchen you could hear the faint sound of your grand piano playing and a few familiar voices singing Christmas songs. After dinner you decided to stay behind and clean up the table, gathering all the used dishes and utensils before starting to wash them.

While washing you couldn’t help but think about Steve, how happy and laid-back he was talking and laughing with your family during dinner. He sat next to Bucky and he was across from you, and every now and then you would steal glances at him just to see him smile or talk or laugh and he was fucking beautiful. A couple of times he’d catch you staring at him and you’d quickly look away, but even if you were already caught you still couldn’t help yourself because he was so irresistible and so fucking attractive and adorable and sweet and—

“You need a hand with that?”

You slightly jumped at the voice and when you turned to look your heart did a sudden somersault to see the man you’ve been drooling over for the past hour already. He wasn’t wearing a coat anymore and he only had a black sweater on, and you could clearly make out his taut muscles and thick stomach underneath his clothing.

Snap out of it!!!

“Oh! Uh, i-it’s fine. I’m good, thanks.” You nervously replied, giving him a shy smile as your went back to your washing, praying that he wouldn’t notice your shaking.

“Are you sure? Those seem like a lot of dishes, and from what your mom told me you and your sister cooked and set up the table. Which looks really beautiful, by the way.”

But not as beautiful as you are...

“Thank you, but Christina did all the cooking. I only helped in the set up.” You laughed a little, not daring to look at his face.

“Still, I wanna help. It’s the least I could do for letting me stay the night.” He insisted softly, feeling him come closer.

“Steve, no.” You said more firmly, your heart loving the way his name rolled out of your lips perfectly. “If mom sees you doing the dishes, she’ll kill me. You’re the guest here. You’re supposed to be in the living room with Bucky or meeting my cousins. They’re ecstatic to have you here with us.”

He chuckled, stepping even closer to you and you could feel his warmth brushing against you as he gently took the dish in your hand, slowly continuing your work, as if him moving slowly you’d finally give in to him helping you.

“Ecstatic? How come?”

You couldn’t help but smile even if you tried putting on a firm look, watching him carefully rinse the dishes. “We don’t always have a guest over aside from the usual folks that come around for Christmas. Plus, you’re Buck’s friend from work. They all adore him and they’re always so interested in his work.”

“Well, being in the army is not exactly the kind of work I’d like to call ‘interesting’. It’s more dangerous and serious.” He replied in a more serious tone.

“Is it really scary out there? You know, while in battle or being in the hideout?” You asked curiously, watching him finish off the last few dishes, your plan on shooing him away slowly dissipating.

“To be honest, yeah. It’s always so tense and that constant feeling you get that there could be danger anywhere always in the back of your head, and you couldn’t sleep well at night because you’re too on edge no matter how tired you are.” He replied with a somber tone, watching how he drifted back to when he was still in battle. It must have been hard for him to go through like that everyday, not knowing when the war will be over.

“But still...” you spoke out softly after a few seconds of silence. “It was all worth it in the end, right?”

He smiled. “Of course it was. I chose to be in the army. I wanted to help save our country. I wanted to protect and fight for the better good.”

You couldn’t help but smile at him. Taking advantage of the fact that he wasn’t looking at you, you took your time to marvel in how beautiful he was up close. His nose, his perfectly sculpted face, sharp jawline, and those lips that are to die for. Not to mention his brave and courageous and kind heart.

“I know we just met but I’m proud of you, Steve.” You suddenly blurted out. “You and Bucky. You guys are our heroes.”

This time he finally looked up at you and his storm blue eyes lit up. He didn’t know why, but he could feel his neck heat up that somehow trailed up to his ears and face, worried you might notice his intense blushing. He’s heard so many praises like that before, but when it came from your own mouth his heart rejoiced unexpectedly. He just met you, and he had a burning feeling that you’re going to mean more to him than just being Bucky’s cousin.

............................... ............................... .......................

Part two is up!

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surveys-at-your-service · 4 years

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Survey #267

“you can take my heart, you can take my breath - when you pry it from my cold, dead chest.”

When did you last talk to the last person you kissed? Last night. Do you think people have any misconceptions about you? Oh, I'm positively certain. What’s something you wish you could understand better? There are a great many things, but the first that came to mind are certain political/moral beliefs that I REALLY do want to understand, but I just don't. When was the last time you cried really, really hard? About a week back when I woke up shrieking and sobbing from a nightmare about Dad. Have you ever injected a drug? No. How many people have you liked in the past 5 months? I've been COnfuFSSeD!!!!!! Are you currently in a relationship? Nope. Probably for the better. Have you ever touched a dead body? Animals, yes. I may have at an open-casket wake, but idr. I was young. Ever played Grand Theft Auto? Nope, but oh man, good memories of those stupid games with my neighbor back when I was younger... He loved that game just to fuck around, and I liked watching. Then Jacob and Jason played it together at the apartment a lot, and those are warm memories, too. The last male you spoke to … is he attractive? That would be my 3-year-old nephew, so it'd be fucking weird to call him that. He's one handsome little boy, though. We all know he's gonna be a lady killer one day. If your ex called right now, would you answer? Yeah. Is there a dictionary on your bookshelf? I don't even have a bookshelf. Do you have any pet names for the person you love/like? Not anymore. Who was the last person you had a serious conversation with? What is your honest opinion of that person? Mom. I love her to death. Who was the first person you dated? What is your honest opinion of that person? Aaron was my puppy-dog love, and I have not the slightest clue what he's up to now, but I have faith he's kept that good head of his. Ever fallen in the shower? I've passed out while getting *out* of it. I've slipped a number of times too, but not truly fallen. Do you think that things will get better? For me, I genuinely don't know. Ever been to a bonfire party? Yes, by my cousins' friend's pool for a b-day party. It was cool. Their house was fuckin' wild. Movie theater inside and all. Is your dad bald? Just about. His head is just mostly shaved. Have you ever slept at a member of the opposite sex’s house? I mean yeah, all the time when we were together. Have you ever hooked up with someone to hurt someone else? Wow, no. I don't do "hook-ups" anyway. Do any of your relatives actually pinch your cheeks when they see you? No. Have you ever made a member of the opposite sex cry? Ugh, yeah. Do you know the last person you kissed's parents? Yes, I adore them. Do they like you? I think so. Name a couple things you can cook. ... Literally just scrambled eggs, if you mean something pretty much from scratch. Well, I could probably still do pasta if I read the box. Who was there to help you last time you were puking? My mom. I am absolutely terrified of vomiting, so she's kind enough to somehow manage to stand in there with me and talk to me. Are there any boxes of tissues in your room? What’s the design on it? No. Are you in high school? When are you done? No. I graduated in 2014. Are you embarrassed to say if you’re a virgin or not? More like confused and awkward, because I genuinely DON'T know for sure. Have you ever met someone you thought you’d be with forever? It was "certainty" to me. That's partially why the breakup was so traumatizing. I MEAN IT when I say my brain couldn't even fathom the idea. It was "impossible." It simply couldn't happen. Then it did. ^Where are you two now? We haven't spoken in three years. Has your best friend ever been in love? Yes. What was the last magazine you bought? I've never been a magazine person. Will the last person you kissed get you anything for your next birthday? *shrugs* Do you think Family Guy is funny or just stupid? It can be both. Have you ever stayed with someone who treated you like shit just because you liked them so much? NO SIR-EE. You'd never see me stay with someone who treated me badly. Would you date someone all your friends and family hate? If I REALLY liked them, but if everyone hated that person, I would seriously consider why that is. Are you already looking forward to your wedding? Ha ha, not really, in most ways. Like, I hate getting all fancy and such. Have you ever spit on someone? No. Would you rather cuddle or make out? I MEAN, that depends on the mood??? Has your best friend ever been cheated on? No. Do you text with one hand or with both? Both. Are your parents left or right-handed? Right, to my knowledge? What was the last photo you took of? Something on FB I wanted to show to Sara. What topic always interests you and you will never tire of? C R Y P T I D Z Are you more or less tolerant than the average person? If you mean of varying beliefs, stuff like that, definitely more. If someone were to rate your life, what film certificate would it receive? PG-13 or R, idk. Actually, probably R for all they profanity lmaooo. Do you mind eating cold fries or are they disgusting? Ewww. What song makes you cry? What about it makes you cry? I physically cannot listen to "Stairway to Heaven" by Led Zeppelin because of Jason joking at prom that the music sucked and we could dance to something like that, then once he took me home, I played it from my iPod over his car speakers and we danced in the headlights of his truck and it all felt like a fairy-tale. I'm emotional just typing it and it makes my stomach hurt, so moving on. If you could remake a movie, which movie would it be? Silent Hill: Revelation. As a fanatic over the series, I enjoyed it decently, but, objectively, it sucked and was ALL over the place. How about if you could rewrite a book's ending, which one? Why? I don't think I'd change any. Maybe a clearer answer to The Handmaid's Tale, but it's still g. What colour hair does your sibling(s) have? Brown, except Misty and Katie. Theirs is black. What gemstone would you like on your wedding ring? A dragon's breath opal or rose gold would be gorgeous. What are you looking forward to in the near future? We're throwing my little sister a surprise graduation party at our older sis's house. Thanks to the quarantine, her senior graduation isn't *actually* happening, so. How is life going for you, anyway? Be honest. IT KINDA S U CKS!!!!!! What time did you get changed this morning? I haven't changed out of my pj's. I almost never do (besides obviously after a shower) because I have nowhere to go, like ever. Have you met somebody that you want to spend the rest of your life with? Yeah. Have you ever dressed up as a Disney character? Which one? Maybe as a kid? Have you ever played chess? If so, are you good at it? I’ve never played it. If I wanted to buy you a chocolate bar, what kind should I NOT get? Ew, Snickers. Of all your close friends, who have you known the longest? Sara. What was the last song you heard, that made you feel emotional? Hm. Maybe "Disguise" by Motionless In White. I wonder all the time if that's how Jason felt. Plus it's his favorite band, so that's a double whammy. When was the last time you took a selfie? Maybe about a month ago. As a child, did you ever have any scented gel pens or markers? Oh, I remember those! Yes. Name an alcoholic beverage that you dislike. Hell, most that I've tried. I hate strong stuff. Can you recall the last time you were on a dancefloor? When I was shooting someone's wedding last year. Do you own any color-changing mood jewellery? No, I have zero faith in those. What was the last thing you heated up in your microwave? Ummm pizza rolls, I think. What was the last flavor of ice cream you had? Moose tracks. Do you have an online game that you play often? I play World of Warcraft daily, and I enjoy the Dragons of Atlantis app a few times a day. I was into it when it was still a game on an actual website, and I more recently downloaded it on my phone. What’s your favorite cookie? Soft chocolate chip... yum. How long would you have to date someone for before moving in together? I think this depends very much on the relationship, BUT LIKE, definitely not TOO quickly because you need to test the endurance of the relationship. I'd at the very least give it a year and seriously consider how healthy the relationship is. Moving in with each other shouldn't be an impulsive "this is working great omg I love him/her let's do this!!!!". What's your favorite kind of sushi? N/A How much was the last bill that you paid? I've never paid a bill... wow, that's sad. What was the cause of the worst low point you've had in your life? A very abrupt, traumatic breakup. What are some of your favorite types of cheeses? Really just American. When did you last feel like your privacy was invaded? I'm not sure. Do your parents volunteer anywhere? No. Do you own more than 50 books? I have my Warriors books stocked somewhere. Probably in the attic. Do you have a bachelor's degree? Bitch I wish. How old were you when you became financially independent from your parents? I'm 24 and still aren't independent. Does your kitchen have an island? No. Have you ever bought or sold something on Facebook Marketplace? No. Do you know anyone famous enough to have their own Wikipedia page? No. What was the last appointment you had? With my psychiatrist over the phone because yeah quarantine. Why did you last feel like crying? I woke up from yet another nightmare. I'm so, so tired of them. They make me dread sleep. Do you keep your friends secrets/private information to yourself? If it truly is private, yes, and secrets, absolutely. What negative quality do your friends bring up the most? "I... don’t think I’d like to be friends with people who have a habit of bringing up 'negative' things about me." <<<< This. Do you often "jump" to conclusions? ONLY ALWAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What about the world do you wish you never found out? Christ, there's a lot. For some reason, the first thing that came to mind is the dogmeat trade in Korea. A girl in my first semester did a presentation on it, and just... wow. I never had the slightest clue it was a thing. Does the sight of blood make you feel sick? No. Does someone's background affect whether you'll be friends with them or not? Well, yeah. I'm not gonna be friends with a rapist or something. How about their religious background? Depends on if they push that shit on me or not, as well as things they believe. If someone admitted cheating in a past relationship of theirs, would you trust them? NNNNNNNNNOPE. Do you drink tea and/or coffee every day? There are so many tea/coffee questions in surveys... and no. I don't like either. Did you ever want to be a cook as a kid? No. Do you wish that magic was real? Well, it depends on what the magic is. Do you prefer fire or ice? Fire is cooler. Do you rap along with rap songs? No. When happy, do you become more talkative? WAY MORE. Bowling or sailing? Why? Never sailed before, but bowling is fun. Especially with the lights off but all the neon and signs lit up. Do you prefer sitting in the front or back of a car? THE FRONT!!!!!!!!! Sitting shotgun and being able to control the music is everyTHIIIIIIIIIIIING. How about in a train? On the bus? I don't really have a preference here. Do you care about politics? I should... Are you offended easily by non-politically correct language? No, honestly. Do you think the censors/fcc go a bit too far or are just right? Definitel too far. Have you ever taken a martial art? Which one(s)? No. Do you know anyone who is scared of you? No. I am so unintimidating. Do you like watermelon? Not really, no. Can you remember the month of your first kiss? April or May, p sure. What do you think is the most interesting thing about you? Uh. I dunno, man. Do you have a photo album? Mom has tons. What was your biggest fear as a child? Thunderstorms. I was fucking terrified. Can you remember all your past teachers' names? The majority. Do you find people taller than you intimidating? Generally tall men do, but not always. What's your favorite thing about your country? We have a lot of freedom. What's your least favourite thing about your country? We're greedy as fuck. What websites do you have bookmarked? I have a few on my personal laptop, which I don't have access to now so can't recall well. What TV show scared you as a kid? Courage the Cowardly Dog... though I watched it anyway lmao. What is one thing you regret having done or not done in your life? There's a lot. Let's not focus on it. Which parent do you identify with the most? I guess Mom. What embarrasses you the most in front of other people? laskdjflawe admitting I RP is almost ENTIRELY IMPOSSIBLE to others, especially in-person. If you had to choose one thing you were most passionate about, what would it be and why? Politics, 'cuz that's shit that seriously matters and affects the world. Who are you most envious of—real or fictional—and why? Probably an old friend who's an award-winning, quite successful photographer here in the state. She's shot fashion and model stuff professionally. She's absolutely gorgeous, does the coolest stuff... What’s the saddest song you’ve ever heard? Good Lord, I know so many. "UR A WOMAN NOW" by Otep is one, then there's "Terrible Things" by Mayday Parade, "Cancer" by My Chemical Romance... wow, I'm so surprised they're not just rushing to me. How about the sweetest song? Biiiiiih "Here For You" by Ozzy Osbourne laskdjfk;awe Do you know how to play dominoes? No. What food will you absolutely not, under any circumstances, eat? Exotic/endangered animal meat. What is one thing you’re embarrassed to admit you want to try? Uhhh I'm really not sure. Which famous person would you like to be BFFs with? Shane Dawson is MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. Is there something you wish you had said sorry for but never did? Many things.

#survey #surveys #random questions

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mybipolar-coaster · 5 years

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An Introduction

I would like to say it was an easy decision to write down my experiences thus far in life but that would be a lie. I don’t really consider myself an interesting person. As a matter of fact, I consider myself rather boring. I like boring things like history and science. I studied statistics in university. I’ve led what I would consider an amazingly average life. That is, until late last year when I was diagnosed with Bipolar Affective Disorder, or as those in the states would call it, Bipolar I. Since then, so many things in my life have clicked into place. Things that had always seemed unusual now had a reason behind them, a cause. I had something I could point to and say, “that’s why”. Since being diagnosed I have found an entire community online of people both living with the disorder and coping with the fallout of it. I have also had my own share of trials and ordeals to deal with since my diagnosis, but that’s getting ahead of myself a bit. First, let me explain what it was that finally made me commit to writing this blog. I am currently waiting for the right opportunity to ask the girl I have been dating for the past 10 years to marry me. I have the ring. I know the when, I know the where. The how is still slightly eluding me but I think a small amount of improvisation on that front won’t hurt. This is what made me want to write this blog. I wanted to detail my feelings leading up to asking the question. I hope to portray the excitement and nerves leading up to the moment of truth so that afterwards I can get my (hopefully) fiancée to read back and see how much thought, work and planning went into this and how much I love her. But then I thought, “hey, why stop there”? I could keep the blog going afterwards, talk about ordinary, every-day things. Perhaps even give people an insight into how I live with my condition and how it affects those around me. I have always been a creative person and I enjoy writing, so maybe this could be a new hobby for me. I certainly hope so. So, this will be the first post in a hopefully ongoing series of blog posts. However, in the off chance that my girlfriend does happen to stumble upon this blog, I will be operating under strict anonymity for the time being. I won’t say my name, or the name of anyone that could be used to identify me in these blogs, at least until after I’ve popped the question, but everything else within will be true. I think an ideal first post then, would be for me to give a quick recap of my life so far, and give you the reader an introduction to my life and how my messed-up brain works. I hope you enjoy!

I was born in the UK in the early 90’s (trying to be vague) into a working-class family. My dad worked as an electrician in a dog-food factory and my mum volunteered as a cook in a nursing home. My parents were quite old when they had me, so there is a large age gap between me and the rest of my family. In fact, when I was born both of my older brothers were teenagers. My mum says that one of my brothers refused to talk to her or my dad for a year after they told him they were pregnant because he was so disgusted that they were still having sex “at their age”. Having an older family definitely has its advantages though. When I was young, all my siblings had jobs, so I got four times the amount of presents that most other kids got. I should point out that I also have a sister, who is the closest in age to me. Growing up, me and my sister got on like oil and water. I’m surprised my mum managed to survive through my early years – in the same year my sister turned sixteen I was going through my “terrible twos”. I have always been a mummy’s boy. Even now that I’m in my 20’s, I get on great with my mum and have a good relationship with her. I bring up my mum because she was my first ever contact with mental illnesses. My mum had panic attacks and generalised anxiety when I was younger. I have multiple memories of us being somewhere and my mum suddenly bursting into floods of tears, sometimes running away, and my dad having to track her down and console her. It was an incredibly scary experience as a child but, to my mum’s credit, she did a great job of explaining things as she calmed down. She would tell me it wasn’t anyone’s fault, that it was something that was medically wrong with her like being sick and that I shouldn’t blame myself for her attacks. Her explanations were pivotal in my understanding of mental illnesses and my dad’s behaviour during these attacks served as an example to me for the rest of my life on how to deal with a crisis situation.

Even far back in my childhood, symptoms of my bipolar were there. It was subtle, but there were things about me that made me different from other kids. I could be morose or have fits of worry every now and then. I would worry about dying, or someone in my family being hurt. I was very young when I realised that, because there was such a big age gap between me and the rest of my family, I was most likely going to have to watch my whole family die. I’d have to attend their funerals, possibly give speeches, and then I’d be left alone at the end. This terrified me as a child and even now it still serves as a strange sort of morbid obsession during my low days. For instance, I have the speech I will give at my father’s funeral memorised and have done for quite some time. My dad isn’t even ill and shows no signs of kicking the bucket anytime soon, but it plays in my head so often that I’ll be prepared for when that day comes. In fact, I’ll be prepared in more ways than one. Ever since I was a child, I have been experiencing a symptom of bipolar affective disorder that I didn’t even realise was unusual until I was diagnosed. I spent my entire life thinking everyone got this at certain points in their lives and it was only after a conversation with my girlfriend where she pointed out that this wasn’t normal that I went to a psychiatrist and got diagnosed. This symptom is called Disassociation. Disassociation can happen multiple ways, but it always affects me the same way. During moments of crisis, moments of importance or sometimes when I feel I am in a place of some significance, I feel as if I leave my body and allow another entity to control it. That sounds far more sinister than what it actually feels like so let me try and explain it as best I can. Most people experience going on autopilot, where their mind switches off and they continue to do some monotonous or repetitive task. My Disassociation feels a bit like that. The entity that takes over my body is my autopilot. He will do what I would want to do anyway. He doesn’t have his own needs or wants. He just does. I, on the other hand, leave my body. I picture it like that episode of Tom & Jerry where Tom accidentally kills himself with a falling piano while chasing Jerry. His soul leaves his body and rises up to cat heaven only to not be allowed in because he’s been so mean to Jerry. Well my “soul” (I don’t believe in a soul so the more fitting term here would probably be id) leaves me in the same way and floats, just above and behind me, and observes. I feel like I am acting like a documentarian in these moments. Like a wildlife cameraman observing the animal he has been tracking for years being eaten by a predator – I am totally detached. I’m there to watch, not to influence. Sometimes I think maybe I’m me in the future, remembering this event and not actually the present me at all. Does this make sense? It’s a very strange sensation and, from what I gather, kind of unique to me so I really struggle to explain it to other people. My girlfriend thinks she can sometimes tell when I’m disassociating though. She says I become wide-eyed and emotionless, talking in a monotone. This might be true, but she has only been able to correctly identify when I’m disassociating twice in the entire time I’ve known her so it might just be they were particularly noticeable incidents.

Of course, the other big symptom of Bipolar Affective Disorder is the mood cycles. When I was younger, my cycles were generally rather enjoyable but as I have gotten older, they have gotten less enjoyable and more something to be monitored and observed. Before I go any further into how my cycle affects me, I feel I should spend a bit of time explaining the cycle as a lot of people don’t really get the Bipolar cycle and there is a lot of misinformation in the media. To put it in the simplest terms, lets imagine a scale from 0 to 10. Now if you are a neurotypical, normal person, I want you to imagine the happiest you have ever been. Then I want you to imagine the saddest you’ve ever been. Now if I was to say to you that 0 is the worst and 10 is the best, where would you put those memories? Probably 0 and 10, right? Well, in terms of measuring bipolar moods, we tend to use the 0 to 10 scale as well but ours is a bit different. When you get down to 0, there should be extreme hopelessness. Either you haven’t moved for extended periods, haven’t eaten and most likely have self-harmed, tried to commit suicide or have at least given it serious thought. Now your 0 may hit a lot of those same notes. You may have considered killing yourself after the death of a close loved one or a life event that hit you particularly hard. Once again, I want you to think back to that worst moment in your life. Now what if I said you’d feel that way every few months. You feel like that, not because something has happened or because you lost something but because it’s September. It’s just that time again. Now let’s go to the other side of the spectrum. This one is a little trickier because it involves more than just emotion, it involves energy levels and sanity levels. This is an important thing to bear in mind with bipolar. If you’re a normal person, your 10 is the happiest you’ve ever been in your life. If you’re bipolar, you’re 10 is the furthest from reality you’ve ever been in your life. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes mania can feel great but sometimes it can feel like hell. A 10 on the bipolar scale can involve hallucinations, delusions of grandeur, an insane amount of energy that absolutely must be excised, a manic state and way of speaking and a lack of need to sleep. Seriously, while manic I can sleep for as little as 2 hours in a 48-hour period and feel absolutely fine. The only upside to a manic state is that it can sometimes feel really good and all that energy helps you get through a lot of work if you can keep focused. You also tend to get a burst of creativity while manic which can help with business projects, artistic creations or even writing the first post for a new blog!

I think I’ll leave it here for my first blog post, I’ve explained a little about myself and why I wanted to start this blog, but mostly rambled in my scatter-brained way about my bipolar disorder. I think I’ve put enough words down for today and I’ll pick up on this tomorrow. I promise I will get into more of the general diary keeping and talking about the proposal, but I feel it is important to get this bipolar stuff explained first so that you know what lens I look at the world through before I start telling you what I can see. And if you’re reading this, I love you Gorgeous!

-B

#bipolar #bipolaraffectivedisorder #bipolardisorder #proposal #marriage #blog #firstpostever #personal #bipolar affective disorder

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eternallyyoungjustice · 5 years

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Wherever the Winds Take You: Chapter 7

A/N: Sorry I skipped a week guys. Life’s been hella chaotic with school and the new pupper and I just didn’t have time to write or publish. But without further ado, here we go. Not super happy with this one, but c’est la vie.

Deléson, France

July 6

15:00

Deléson is known by few as a rural pearl amongst a city oyster. Sprawling farmland for as long as the eye can see, one’s sight line only obstacled by the patches of large trees and small cottage-esk houses, a calm river twisting through the town that was commonly accompanied by groups of children playing. All this in a decently short distance from the beautiful and bustling city of Paris. So although the community of Deléson was close, and more than happy to trade resources with one another, anyone could easily go to the neighbouring capital to pick up anything they couldn’t get locally.

This was one upside that the Dubois family took advantage of quite often, especially the middle child amongst them.

Evangélina Dubois was quite familiar with the road that lead in and out of Paris to Deléson, and for good reason. For one, the school she had been going to for the better part of two years was located just at the border. And although that particular building was far from her favorite, it was definitely a staple in her life. But then it came to her legitimate favorite building in the city: the Martín Dance Studio.

As much as her ‘extracurriculars’ helped her move on from her accident, it was the dance studio that kept her sane. When Lina woke up from her coma and was forced into a normal civilian life, or as normal as it would be with the aforementioned extracurriculars, she found one of the biggest holes in her life, save for her mother, was her act. When she effectively became a simple girl from a simple French town, she could practically feel her muscles cry to her every minute to be pushed to their full potential. To fly through the air without the Winds. To fly with only her own strength, endurance, and maybe a little chalk.

Meeting and befriending her only friend outside of her second life helped fix that. It gave her a reason to bike into Paris every day. It gave her free access to a dance studio for an hour, maybe two if she really begged.

And the beautiful fresh air Lina was exposed to on that hour-long one-way bike trip, plus the gorgeous scenery that still managed to catch her by surprise after years of living in it, was more than a fair price to pay for a sense of pseudo-normalcy.

So yes, it was safe to say that whenever the Dubois family was in need of something that they couldn’t simply trade one of their many friendly neighbours for, Lina was often the one to volunteer to go into town and get it.

Even if she often dreaded the final stretch, having to balance a load of full paper bags into the house by herself since nobody on the property bothered to answer to her call for help.

So much for a loving family.

Upon giving up on trying to twist the handle herself, Lina resorted to kicking on the yellow wood of the house’s front door.

“If any of the seven people that sleep on this plot of land would be so kind as to simply open a door, it would very much appreciated!” Lina shouted for good measure, a tone of underlying annoyance in her voice.

A moment and lots of muffled shuffling later, the door swung open to reveal a pale, slightly wrinkled, dirt-covered face.

“Sorry Miss, didn’ hear you pull in.” The thick Cockney accent of Travis Jones rushed as he gave the much younger girl a lop-sided grin which accented his missing teeth.

Huffing in a deep breath, Lina tightness her grip on her bags and waddled into her family home. “Not a problem Travis, I wasn’t angry at you. Thank you for getting the door though. Do you know if my brothers are here and alive?”

Travis ruffled his dull red hair, which released a couple specks of dirt from the strands. “Pretty sure they’re both upstairs Miss, and breathin’ last I heard.”

Lina dropped the bags onto the kitchen counter, which sat just by the front door, and exhaled deeply. “I swear those two...you’re our field-hand, our friend. Not our butler. I feel bad that you had to get the door, and for yelling.”

“Like I said Miss, no problem. Happy to help, I am. I was just heading out anyways, just finished lunch y’see. All of us did, including your Dad. I think he’s back out in the fields, you want me to get him for you? Or I could help put away some of them there bags if you’d like.”

“That’s really not necessary Travis, but thank you.” Lina smiled. “And don’t worry about my Father, I’ll see him at dinner, as I presume I’ll also be seeing you?”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way Miss.” Travis said, nodding his head in farewell before ducking out the door. Sighing once more, Lina went to putting away her recent purchases. But not before letting out a loud, strong “Boys!”.

There was a number of thumps, some colourful words in various languages, more thumps, and then the patter of socked feet running down the wooden steps that connected the two levels of the house. Those feet, Lina was not surprised to see, were accompanied by a tall, well-built body and a head of golden blonde. However, that body was missing something very important.

“Calvin,” Lina frowned at her older brother, “where is your shirt?”

The eldest of the Dubois siblings looked down at his bare chest, then shrugged. “I was warm.”

“So you decided to go around half-naked?” Lina’s eyebrows furrowed even further.

Calvin seemed to think for a moment, then nodded. Lina, used to her brother’s antics by now, simply shook her head in disbelief. Unzipping the thin pullover that she had been wearing, one that had been his a few months back, she threw the article of clothing at the blonde.

“Ah, so I finally get this back then?” Calvin asked, smirking as he slipped the pull-over on.

“For now.” Lina smirked back. Her remark was quickly followed by the frantic footsteps of much lighter feet. Once the footsteps had made their way to the bottom of the stairs, a very flushed and disoriented-looking Leo made his appearance. The barely thirteen year old snarled as he directed his eyes to Lina, but pointed an accusing finger at Calvin.

“He shoved me into upstairs closet and locked the door! I had to pick the lock to get out!” The young boy exclaimed, causing Lina to glare at Calvin. The eldest simply shrugged.

“What?” Calvin said nonchalantly, switching to English. “We all know he’s ‘in the closet’ already.”

“Calvin!” Lina exclaimed.

Leo was left massaging his temples in annoyance as he took a seat next to Calvin. “‘Come out to your family’, they said. ‘It’ll make everything some much easier’, they said.” He mumbled under his voice, interweaving French and English as he spoke, something he did when he was thinking.

After taking a moment to rub the bridge of her nose, Lina focused back on her brothers. “I'm making a late lunch, have the two of you eaten?”

Both boys shook their heads, and Lina sighed as she began her cooking. As she prepared the meal, conversation flowed easily among her and her siblings. They spoke of the students Leo had volunteered to tutor during the summer holidays, Calvin's new girlfriend, Lina's new team and their adventures in Cadmus, and a new film they all wanted to see together.

When he was a boy, Calvin's blonde hair had always been cut short as to remove any possible fire-hazard. His face had always been chiseled and fairly attractive-looking as a young man, from the age of 16 he'd picked up quite a talent for flirting with female audience members. A long nose, bushy eyebrows, strong jaw, and-as was rampant amongst the Dubois family- lots of freckles. These past few years however, Calvin had let his hair grown so it nearly brushed his chin and fell into his eyes-the same eyes as his sister's. He had achieved a sort of American surfer look with his naturally wavy hair. He'd also filled out a bit which had gained him a fair amount of muscle mass. But what always concerned Lina was the growing number of little scars that would occasionally pop up on his face every once in a while. Nothing so major as to alarm suspicion, but enough to catch Lina's attention.

Leo however, had done very little to change in appearance these past few years. While Calvin and Lina had both taken up certain physical exercises that had led them to become bigger (moreso Calvin than Lina, much to her dismay), Leo had become more studious and dedicated to reading and indoor activities. Although the rapid growth spurts that came with puberty had made him fairly tall, taller than his sister at the absolute very least, and he was lanky and almost skeletal-looking. A marvel in fact, as the boy would eat as much as some of the family's pigs. To add to the contrast between him and his brother, Leo had strictly kept his hair shortly trimmed in an almost buzz-cut that showed off his pointed featured and elf-like ears. His eyes, wide and hazel much like their mother's, were framed by large, circular glasses which took up more than its share of his face.

As Lina gazed at her brothers, a sense of love and pride filled her chest and a small smile pulled her lips thin. Every single one of the family members had taken the accident hard, and who could blame them? Losing their mother, having one of the children fall into a coma that she may not have ever woken up from, having to leave the circus their families had been a part of for 5 generations and their friends/family because of the ghosts that lingered. It was terrible. But slowly and surely, they were each recovering.

Sure, Lina thought, Markus had driven himself head-first into his work, Calvin had become an adrenaline junkie and would disappear to Goodness-knows-where for hours at a time, and Leo isolated himself into his schoolwork and books. But they were recovering, and they were together. At the end of the day, that was what mattered.

Lina's thoughts were interrupted by her phone buzzing in her pocket. Placing the lid on the pot she had been stirring, she took out the device and opened it to see that it was simply a text from her friend.

Hey Lina,

Sorry to hear I missed you at the studio this morning. I have a new CD I've been meaning to hand out to you, you'll love it. I think there's one song you would really love to dance to. I'm working the closing shift tomorrow if you want to drop by and pick it up.

-Q

“A message from a lover?” Calvin asked, tipping his head forward.

“Quinn, actually.” Lina responded, quickly typing out ‘yes, absolutely!’ and pressing send before placing her phone back in her pocket.

“Boring.” Leo hummed, a mischievous smirk pulling at his lips.

“Indeed, for a moment I thought you were actually going to be exciting, Evangélina.” Calvin smirked as well.

Lina frowned at her brothers. “I'm a hero with superpowers.” She argued. “What more do you want from me?"

Both brothers just shrugged and fell back into their previous conversation. Lina simply rolled her eyes and finished preparing the meal, scooping the thick liquid into a trio of bowls once it was complete.

“Smells delectable.” Calvin smiled as Lina placed the bowls in front of the two of them.

“Boeuf bourguignon?” Leo asked, and Lina nodded as she began to spoon into her own bowl.

“A cheap version. We had some leftover beef and vegetables that I thought I should use.”

“Definitely no complaints here.” Calvin laughed as he dug in.

As the three ate, they continued to speak to one another. Except this time, the conversation was more disjointed and they bounced from random topic to random topic, jokes and laughter thrown in at points which would make the occasional person almost choke on their meal. But sadly, their conversation was cut off by someone walking through the door. A strongly-built middle-aged man, in his mid-40s, with a weathered face full of wrinkles, bright freckles, salt and pepper hair, and blue eyes.

“Ah, so the rumors are true.” Markus Dubois smiled happily. “All three of my children are home and together for once. I'm surprised nobody's bleeding on the ground yet.”

“Eat first, then fighting to the death.” Calvin laughed, lifting his spoon towards his father before bringing it to his mouth.

“Lina made boeuf bourguignon, if you'd like some.” Leo offered.

“Thank you, but I already ate.” Markus said, patting his stomach as he walked over to where his children sat. “Besides, eating too much of Lina's cooking will make me even fatter.”

Lina rolled her eyes as her brothers snickered, Markus simply placed a leathered hand on his daughter's head before walking away.

“I'm just here to pick up something in the back. Keep the fighting to the death to a minimum, alright? I don't need the house being thrown up into the sky, or my walls painted in blood.”

“Yes sir.” The trio of teens said in unison as their father disappeared into the back of the house. Once the man came back and left to go through the front door however, he seemed to freeze, then turn back to Lina.

“Ah, Evangélina, it's for you.”

Frowning, Lina stood and walked over to the door only to find a tall, strong-looking, blonde woman standing there clad in a pair of fishnet stockings, shorts, a corset, a leather jacket, and a stern look.

“Black Canary, it's nice to see you again.” Markus nodded, slightly apprehensive towards the woman.

Dinah Lance gave off a strict ‘I can kill you with just a look’ vibe, even in a fairly small uniform. Strong, defined muscles from years and years of tough training and even tougher mentors, scars littering her pale skin like sprinkles on a cake, and a cold grey gaze that could freeze many people more than most ice-themed heroes or villains. To say that you didn't want to mess with her would be an understatement. But after two years of knowing her, Lina knew that there was a much softer side in her. Especially around the French girl herself, Roy, or her long-term boyfriend Ollie AKA Oliver Queen AKA Green Arrow.

“You too Mr. Dubois, it's been too long.” The blonde smiled back, then focused on Lina. “Hey kid.”

“Hey Dinah.” Lina replied, sheepishly smiling.

“Sorry to interrupt Markus,” Dinah smiled, turning back to the older man, “but I was wondering if I could steal Lina away for an hour or two? We have some things I'd like to discuss.”

Markus sighed, but remained smiling. “Of course not, as long as it's okay with her.”

Lina smiled to her father and nodded. “I'm not really very hungry anyways.”

“So much for all three of us being together for once.” Calvin snorted loudly from back in the kitchen.

“Too good to be true!” Leo added, chuckling just as loudly.

“In that case, best to get some training gear on Girly.” Dinah said, sharp gaze meeting Lina's much softer one. “We've got some grounding to do.”

Lina let out a small, quiet, whine of anxiety and woe as she made her way upstairs.

“I'll be home in time to make supper.” She called from to her family from the stairs. “Although whether or not I'll able to move, we'll have to wait and see…”

“Have fun being grounded.” Calvin called back.

“Don't get too bruised up.” Leo added. “Or else how will you handle our fighting to the death?”

Grant’s Gym

June 6

12:23

Lina felt the air rush out of her diaphragm as she plummeted onto the hard floor below her, her body seizing for a split-second in reaction to the sheer force.

“I'm not saying you guys were wrong.” Dinah argued as she paced slightly over Lina's fallen body. “Just that you should have taken more precautions. What if you guys had died down there? We never would have known!”

“I’m fairly certain you would have figured it out.” Lina gasped, barely spitting out the words as she tried to regain her breath. “Also, ow.”

“You’re getting good at using your opponent's strength against them, which is good. And your defense has definitely improved.” Dinah nodded. “But you need to up your offense, I know you can do better.”

Lina took a deep breath and picked herself up, taking another fighting stance as Dinah did the same.

This time, it was Lina who made the first attack; lunging forward with a strong punch, which Dinah easily blocked and countered with her own. Following suit Lina blocked the punch, but followed it by latching onto the older woman's arms and using them as leverage hold the woman and kick Dinah in the stomach, using the attack as a spring-board to flip over, landing in a crouching position as Dinah staggered back, winded but safe do to the armour in her corset.

“Better?” Lina asked.

“You're still using mostly defense-strong attacks, you need to learn how to simply attack your opponent as well.” Dinah explained, coming at Lina again. Grabbing onto her shoulders, Dinah moved to force Lina onto the ground but the younger girl rolled; causing the two to summersault until Lina could push her legs up, kicking Dinah off of her and using the momentum to kick-up to a standing position. However, Dinah seemed to plan for this, and from her position on the floor where Lina had kicked her to, she spun her body around and knocked the younger fighter's legs out from under her. Once again, Lina found her body hitting the floor.

“If your opponent realizes early on that your a defensive fighter, they'll try to overpower you and get the upper hand. You need to be able to adapt and switch between offensive and defensive when the time comes in order to keep your opponent on their toes.”

Lina let a few curses, varying in language, escape her lips as she ran her wrapped-up hands over her face.

“I'm a dancer Dinah, an acrobat. I'm agile and fast. Not strong. I'm no Superman, I'm not able to take a missile to the chest and still punch out an army.” Lina groaned, sitting up. “I get that I'm being 'grounded’ but isn't this a little much? We've been at it for hours!”

Although she usually didn't mind Dinah's tough-love during sparring, two hours of getting slammed into Ted Grant's gym fighting rings’ floor was making Lina irritable.

“It doesn't matter that you're not Superman, Lina.” Black Canary spoke calmly as she walked over and offered Lina a hand. “I know you and your potential. I know you can do this. And I know that no matter who or what you are, as a hero: you need to be able to survive in a fire fight.”

As Lina took Dinah's hand and the woman pulled her up, the famous Black Canary fell back into her fighting stance. “Now,” the blonde woman tossed a little bit of hair that had fallen over her shoulder away, “let's try this again.”

“Please!” Lina heard a voice plea. “Use us! You will certainly win the battle if you summon us!”

Lina shook her head. This was a strict fist-only battle. No Winds, no Canary Cry.

She was going to win this one, and it was going to be by herself.

Taking a running start, Lina made to give Dinah a strong right hook, which was once again blocked. The younger of the two didn't wait for a counter attack however, as she went to knee her trainer in the stomach. Dinah must have sensed this however, as the woman swiftly took her free hand and used it to push Lina to the side by the head. Realizing that if she didn't act fast, the battle would be over; Lina swung her head around Dinah's hand and, while the older woman was distracted, directed a strong punch into her corset-covered side. This caused the blonde to not only release Lina's arm, but also to stagger to the side. Not wasting a moment, Lina straightened up and, after running at Dinah again, put all her strength into delivering a left hook. This time, the punch met its mark, and Dinah was dazed enough for Lina to knock her feet out from under her with an easy lower roundabout kick.

As Dinah fell onto her forearms and hands, she watched as Lina unclenched her fists, took a deep breath, and released the tension in her body.

“Now that was better.” Dinah smiled.

“I, uh…” Lina massaged her arm, where her muscles were still tensed. “I guess something you said struck a chord with me.”

“Like I said, you have the potential in you to be a fairly ferocious fighter. We have to work on really unlocking that. For now though…” Dinah spoke as she kicked-up, “Let’s take a break, we've been at it for a while.”

Dinah walked over to the side of the ring and jumped over the railing, but Lina stood there; still rubbing her arm with a dazed-over look in her eyes.

“Kid?” Dinah asked, looking back at her trainee.

Snapping out of her gaze, Lina whirled around, looking startled.

“Pardon?”

“You alright? You looked like you spaced out there for a second.” Dinah asked.

Lina paused, going to nod, but then hesitated and looked down at her first. “It's just...I thought of something from Cadmus...Something that happened when Blockbuster-Desmond was trying to clone us…”

Lina suddenly shook her head, shaking the thought away. “Nevermind, it's nothing.”

Dinah raised an eyebrow, and watched cautiously as Lina flew over the walls of the ring and landed beside her. “Alright then, if you say so…”

The two women took drinks of water in silence for a moment, the elder watching the younger carefully before deciding to break the silence.

“So…about Roy.”

Lina pulled her water bottle away from her lips, turning her gaze to the blonde woman that stood in front of her. Dinah crossed her arms, leaning back against the ring in front of the young brunette.

“I've texted him a couple times.” Lina answered. “He only said that he's safe and still living in his apartment.”

“That's good.” Dinah sighed. “The same thing as Kaldur, and it's better than anyone else has managed to get out of him. Then again, that's not really a surprise. You guys have always managed to get him to at least somewhat listen.”

Lina shrugged. “He doesn't listen to anyone, let's be real.”

Dinah chuckled lowly, nodding. “Yea, but he'll at least hear the two of you out.”

Lina smiled, but then noticed Dinah's tone and her smile faded to a look of understanding. “You want me to hunt him down.”

“Just to check on him!” Dinah assured. “You know how he gets when he's determined, and without any of us to make sure he takes care of himself…”

“I won't try to change his decision.” Lina said, narrowing her eyes. “I may not agree with him, but he's made his choice to go solo. I'm not going to be used to manipulate one of my best friends.”

Dinah kept Lina's gaze, cold metallic silver burning into bright azure. “I won't ask you to.”

Star City

June 7

00:35

Roy Harper entered his small studio apartment through the window, ducking under the window sill and being sure not to apply too much pressure to his left wrist, which was in pain and possibly sprained.

Pulling off his quiver and throwing it and his red compact bow on the couch, the almost 18 year old walked over to his kitchen in order to get his first aid kit, but was promptly stopped by the sound of something dropping onto the floor.

Freezing just outside of the doorway, the redhead strained his ears towards the kitchen to listen for anymore noise from the other side of the wall. When he heard muffled whispering, he jumped into action.

As quietly as possible, Roy dashed back over to the couch. Picking up his bow and hurriedly shouldering his quiver, the archer notched an arrow and quickly, but being aware of any of the creaking floorboards, strolled back over to the kitchen. He put his back to the wall separating him, and the trespasser on the other side.

Listening closely again, he deduced the intruder couldn't be very big by the sound of their feet against the old kitchen tile. Probably just reaching 120ibs, and by the sound of the person's muttering they were probably female.

“Somewhat rare for a cat burglar”, Roy thought, “but not unheard of”.

As the sound of metal being unsheathed, the redhead straightened up. He knew that sound all too well, the sound of someone drawing a knife.

Pulling back the string of his bow, Roy whipped around the corner and aimed the arrow at the intruder's chest. Glaring at the figure, it took a moment before he recognized who it was.

“...is that an arrow pointed at my chest, or are you just happy to see me?”

Exhaling out all the tension in his shoulders, Roy relaxed his arms and bow. After giving the adrenaline a moment to get out of his brain, he looked back up at the tiny brunette standing in his kitchen, holding a knife in one hand and an apple in the other. She looked mildly surprised, but not the usual fear one would have upon having an arrow ready to fire at their chest.

“Lina, I swear to God I was ready to shish kabob your tiny ass!” Roy growled. “What are you doing here? How did you get in?”

“You gave me a key, remember?” Lina asked with a raised eyebrow, dropping the knife to dig into her bra and pull out a ring with a couple keys hanging on it. One in particular had ‘R’ written in red nail polish. “Last year...when you bought this place? And you told me I was welcomed anytime.”

Roy took another deep sigh, dropping his bow and quiver again, leaning them against the wall.

“At the time I didn't think you'd break into my apartment.” He huffed. “And do you care to explain why you're in my kitchen? Isn't it early morning in France right now?”

“Technically it's not breaking in if you have a key given to you by the owner.” Lina shrugged, then motioned to the food surrounding her on almost every one of the kitchen's surfaces. “And I brought food, hence: kitchen.”

Roy furrowed his eyebrows and stepped into the kitchen, eyeing the food cautiously. From what he could tell there was some kind of soup cooking on one stove element and some vegetables steaming on another, there were a few bags of dried fruit in a basket on top of the microwave, a casserole in the oven, fresh bread in a basket, and rice pudding in a bowl in front of Lina.

“You brought a buffet.” Roy corrected, shaking his head. “Lina, you didn't have to-I have food.”

“Oh yeah, I dropped by late last night to see what kind of food you had. You were still out on patrol.” Lina pointed a quick finger as she strolled over to his fridge and opened it to reveal it's near-empty shelves. “A pizza box with a single piece inside, several sauces that have been here since you moved in, a nearly expired carton of milk, and some dried up spinach. Not including all the old, stale, and moldy things I threw out earlier.”

Lina whipped back around to Roy, planting her hands on her waist. “And so, I got up early this morning, got some old stuff from my fridge, plus some extra things from yesterday's pickings, and made you some actual food that won't go bad for a month and that you can eat as you like. De rien.”

Roy pinched the bridge of his nose, dumbfounded. “Lina, I appreciate all this. I do. But...you're not my mother! And you have a family of five to feed, plus farm hands, plus trading goods.”

Lina stepped towards Roy, looking him dead in the eye. “You're my family too Roy, and if you're going to be going at this alone then I need to make sure you're going to do it as healthily as possible. It's summer, harvest time. My father, brothers, farm hands, and I have more than enough.” Lina, bouncing lightly on the balls of her feet, raised a hand and peeled off Roy's domino mask, revealing the dull blue eyes underneath looking right back at her. “Besides, Dinah told me to check up on you. So technically, I'm like your substitute-mother.”

Roy sighed yet again, but this time in resignation, and then gave Lina a small smile. “Thank you.” He finally admitted, and Lina smiled back at him.

“Much better.” She chirped, then she caught sight of the limp wrist at Roy's side. Immediately, she gently took hold of it and turned it over. Roy cringed at the twinge of pain that shot up through his arm, but it was dampened when the soft but calloused flesh of Lina's hand clasped over the joint. She began petting the bone as if she were scanning it, blue eyes carefully looking over his skin. "What happened?"

Roy sighed, knowing he wouldn't be able to brush it off with her. "A guy I was fighting hit it with the butt of his gun. Just a sprain though, nothing to worry about."

Lina sighed, then her eyes squinted as her hands changed their grasp. Roy was about to ask what she was thinking, but then she grabbed onto his elbow, twisted, and a larger spike of pain shot through his bone and into his shoulder-blade. The archer bellowed out curse words and pried his hand away to cradle it as Lina walked over to the first aid kit that sat in a nearby cabinet.

"What the fuck was that for?" Roy yelled.

"It wasn't a sprain, it was dislocated." Lina explained as she walked back and methodically took his wrist back into her own. "Can you move your fingers?"

After a moment in which he pathetically pouted, Roy raised one finger in particular. "Looks like it."

Lina rolled her eyes, but couldn't help a small smirk that itched at her lips as she began to wrap the wrist in the bandage she had collected from the first aid kit. "Smartass." She mumbled.

"You love me anyways." Roy smirked back.

"Somehow." Lina stuck out her tongue as she finished tying up her friend's appendage. After she was finished, she turned away and floated back over to the bowl of pudding and the apple on the counter. “Now, go shower and get rid of that terrible excuse of facial hair on your face and we'll eat and talk together, c'est bien? You have to be careful with that wrist, but it should be good in the water.”

“Yes, mother.” Roy laughed and walked back out of the doorway, picking up his weapons on the way out. But at the last minute, he turned back around. “Hey Kid?”

Lina turned around. “Oui?” She asked.

For a moment, Roy thought hard. But then he finally spoke. “I'm sorry for the way I acted the other day.” He explained. “Not for quitting or confronting the League, but…for what I said to you guys. You guys are ready, more ready than I ever was at your age. You four...you're the good eggs.”

Lina smiled, then nodded. “Yes, we are.” Then, the girl turned back to the apple she was cutting. “And you are more than forgiven, by all of us. Now go! You smell of sweat, and that horrible 5 o'clock shadow really does look terrible.”

Laughing, Roy shook his head and continued down towards his bathroom; leaving Lina to finish her preparation.

Translations:

‘Boeuf bourguignon’: A French stew, typically made up of tender meat and vegetables

‘De rien’: You’re welcome

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chippedcupanddustybooks · 6 years

Photo

Get to know me - tag I was tagged by @anotherplumbob so here you go! I tried to update my simself a bit. Even though my hair is way longer right now :D 1. What is your full name? Celine 2. What is your nickname? Chip 3. Birthday? june 22nd 4. What is your favorite book series? Definitely Harry Potter :D 5. Do you believe in aliens or ghosts? Not in the scary horror movie kind of way. I guess there’s probably some kind of life somewhere out there in the universe. And on the matter of ghosts: Sometimes I want to believe our loved ones aren’t gone completely and still watching over us in some kind but not in a spooky haunting houses kind of way :P 6. Who is your favorite author? J.K. Rowling 7. What is your favorite radio station? I only listen to my local radio station on my way to work in my car 8. What is your favorite flavor of anything? Lime 9. What word would you use often to describe something great or wonderful? awesome I guess 10. What is your current favorite song? Writing down favorites is always so hard because mine change so much :D But I like the song “Odds of Being Alone” by Trent Dabbs & Amy Stroup a lot at the moment

Putting the rest under the cut for not spamming your dash!

11. What is your favorite word? mhm not really favorite word but my best friend is always saying I use the word amusing a lot even though no one really uses it anymore . Also nostalgic 12. What was the last song you listened to? see favorite song 13. What TV show would you recommend for everybody to watch? Everything on this list 14. What is your favorite movie to watch when you’re feeling down? One of the old Disney movies! I have almost every movie on DVD 15. Do you play video games? yes 16. What is your biggest fear? Losing loved ones 17. What is your best quality, in your opinion? I think I’m quit empathic and people say I’m good at giving advice and cheering them up. 18. What is your worst quality, in your opinion? I talk too much and am being sarcastic to protect myself way too much 19. Do you like cats or dogs better? dogs! 20. What is your favorite season? spring but autumn being very close second 21. Are you in a relationship? no 22. What is something you miss from your childhood? not having to worry about so much 23. Who is your best friend? I have a male best friend I met back in high school 24. What is your eye color? Dark blue with a partial heterochromia in my left eye 25. What is your hair color? dark rown 26. Who is someone you love? My family, friends and pets 27. Who is someone you trust? The persons I trust most are my mother and my best friend 28. Who is someone you think about often? Everyone I know that is struggling with something and people I lost 29. Are you currently excited about/for something? Hopefully celebrating christmas with my whole family again this year! Also having some days off around the end of december! 30. What is your biggest obsession? Constantly changing between my hobbys and interests - currently I’m back at obsessing about everything Harry Potter related 31. What was your favorite TV show as a child? As small child I loved House of mouse and Bear in the big blue house 32. Who of the opposite gender can you tell anything to, if anyone? my best friend 33. Are you superstitious? no 34. Do you have any unusual phobias? I absolutely terrified of diving and being pulled under water - especially after a teacher in school nearly drowned me when I was 11yrs old 35. Do you prefer to be in front of the camera or behind it? I’m working in video post production and as a photographer so definitely BEHIND the camera! 36. What is your favorite hobby? ballroom dancing, sims, reading & photography 37. What was the last book you read? Currently rereading the Harry Potter series so right now I’m at chamber of secrets!

38. What was the last movie you watched? I saw phantastic beasts 2 last monday

39. What musical instruments do you play, if any? sadly I can’t play any instruments even though I would love to be able to play the piano 40. What is your favorite animal? dogs 41. What are your top 5 favorite Tumblr blogs that you follow? That’s way too hard to decide :D 42. What superpower do you wish you had? going back in time 43. When and where do you feel most at peace? cuddling with my dogs at home 44. What makes you smile? happy animals, seing my friends & family 45. What sports do you play, if any? I’m not a sports person at all - if you don’t count ballroom dancing 46. What is your favorite drink? coffee 47. When was the last time you wrote a hand-written letter or note to somebody? A long while ago back in school 48. Are you afraid of heights? no 49. What is your biggest pet peeve? narcissim and impoliteness 50. Have you ever been to a concert? no 51. Are you vegan/vegetarian? no 52. When you were little, what did you want to be when you grew up? I always wanted to work with pets but I couldn’t bear seeing all the awful things at a vet or shelter so I decided to go for something different. I still volunteer at the shelter though! 53. What fictional world would you like to live in? The Harry Potter universe 54. What is something you worry about? I’m constantly worrying about everyone around me 55. Are you scared of the dark? no 56. Do you like to sing? in the car to myself yes but in front of others no way 57. Have you ever skipped school? yes I skipped a few useless classes sometimes 58. What is your favorite place on the planet? My favorite city is London. Favorite place is sitting on my window sill with the window open at summer nights! 59. Where would you like to live? London or somewhere in switzerland even though I love my home town 60. Do you have any pets? two silver labradors 61. Are you more of an early bird or a night owl? night owl 62. Do you like sunrises or sunsets better? sunsets 63. Do you know how to drive? Yes 64. Do you prefer earbuds or headphones? For working or at home headphones but for travelling earbuds 65. Have you ever had braces? yes from age 11-14yrs 66. What is your favorite genre of music? I don’t have a favorite genre it’s a wild mix of everything from calm alternative music to Rock’n’Roll from the 50s 67. Who is your hero? My mother 68. Do you read comic books? no but I read some Disney comics when I was younger 69. What makes you the most angry? people lying to my face, someone hurting my loved ones 70. Do you prefer to read on an electronic device or with a real book? I tried to like E-books but I just can’t get used to them and I love the smell of new books! 71. What is your favorite subject in school? Geography 72. Do you have any siblings? 1 half-sister but we don’t have much contact 73. What was the last thing you bought? a christmas present for my grandma and a Winnie Pooh notebook 74. How tall are you? 165cm / 5,4 feet 75. Can you cook? A few things 76. What are three things that you love? cuddling with pets, sitting on my window sill on a rainy day, sleeping 77. What are three things that you hate? having to wake up early, annoying people & animal abuse 78. Do you have more female friends or more male friends? female but it used to be the other way around for a long time 79. What is your sexual orientation? straight 80. Where do you currently live? Germany 81. Who was the last person you texted? a friend of mine 82. When was the last time you cried? two weeks ago on my way back from work after a real shitty week 83. Who is your favorite YouTuber? I don’t watch YouTube a lot so I don’t have one 84. Do you like to take selfies? not at all - my phone is basically 80% dog photos 85. What is your favorite app? the apps I use the most are Whatsapp, discord, tumblr & spotify 86. What is your relationship with your parent(s) like? My mom and I are very close/ my father and I have a very complicated relationship 87. What is your favorite foreign accent? I love the british accent 88. What is a place that you’ve never been to, but you want to visit? I would love to visit canada and ireland one day 89. What is your favorite number? 4 90. Can you juggle? no 91. Are you religious? no 92. Do you find outer space or the deep ocean to be more interesting? The deep ocean even though I’m totally scared of being under water 93. Do you consider yourself to be a daredevil? No not really more of the opposite 94. Are you allergic to anything? kiwis and most pain killers 95. Can you curl your tongue? no 96. Can you wiggle your ears? no 97. How often do you admit that you were wrong about something? I’m always open to admitting I’ve done something wrong in argument because it’s never jsut one person that did something wrong 98. Do you prefer the forest or the beach? forest 99. What is your favorite piece of advice that anyone has ever given you? Not really an advice but a lesson I learned. Sometimes you can’t save everyone from themselves. So sometimes you just have to let go. 100. Are you a good liar? depends on who I’m lying to. I hate lying to people that mean a lot to me so those often notice something is wrong. 101. What is your Hogwarts House? Ravenclaw 102. Do you talk to yourself? yes sometimes 103. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? A mix of both. More of an introvert I guess but once I get to know people I can also be an extrovert 104. Do you keep a journal/diary? I used to a few years ago but not anymore 105. Do you believe in second chances? yes but I give way too many to people I like 106. If you found a wallet full of money on the ground, what would you do?return it or hand it to the police 107. Do you believe that people are capable of change? yes but sometimes people are wa better in changing for the worse 108. Are you ticklish? no 109. Have you ever been on a plane? yes 110. Do you have any piercings? no not even ear holes 111. What fictional character do you wish was real? Dobby! 112. Do you have any tattoos? no 113. What is the best decision that you’ve made in your life so far? applaing for my current job 114. Do you believe in karma? Yes 115. Do you wear glasses or contacts? no 116. Do you want children? I’m not sure if it’s going to change but at the moment I would say I don’t think so 117. Who is the smartest person you know? my mother 118. What is your most embarrassing memory? I’m so clumsy I’m getting myself into embarassing situations every day. But on the top of the list would be a mistake on my graduation that caused ALL my photos from my external drive ending up in the slideshow that was shown on stage... 119. Have you ever pulled an all-nighter? yes 120. What color are most of you clothes? all shades of blue, dark red, grey and brown 121. Do you like adventures? I’m a control freak so it’s hard for me to enjoy situations that I don’t know the end of 122. Have you ever been on TV? yes, I worked as a photgrapher on a pet adoption show and was seen in the background 123. How old are you? 21 124. What is your favorite quote? Sometimes the best book has the dustiest jacket and the best tea cup is chipped ;) 125. Do you prefer sweet or savory foods? Savory I’m tagging @saurussims @simblrbreezycakes & @mlyssimblr (Feel free to ignore this if you don’t want to do it!)

#tag game #get to know me tag #nonsims

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victoriawilegus · 3 years

Text

How Personal Bleeds Professional

I was spending an awful lot of time on thinking today. See I've been seeing this man, and I am 90% certain that it isn't going to work out, not because he isn't an amazing provider, or because he isn't talented, or attractive, but because he has a drinking problem. I come from a history of drug and alcohol abuse in my family which has caused my life a lot of trauma - that coincidentally has shown up in several different areas of my life. One of those being my business venture.

See growing up in an alcoholic home your whole life becomes centered around trying to make life just a little normal. Taking out the garbage with 6-18 beer bottles before my younger siblings could have to worry about getting a ride to school, having to call the neighbors to get a babysitter for yourself because you can't cook at 4 years old, taking the blame for things that are not your fault, and ultimately killing yourself with a sense of guilt of not being good enough.

See there are two sides of living in an alcoholic home, one being the side that has you work to be the idol of something whether that be in school, work, church, volunteer work, sports, or whatever. The other side is the person who is on the opposite side of the spectrum who just can't take it anymore, and unfortunately they are so scared to ask for help this is when problems and self harm can come in.

My siblings and I were so worried about drawing attention to ourselves we strove to be perfect in every way possible. School, cooking, home life, friendships, working as soon as anyone would hire you. It was your responsibility to lift the burden of being there, and if you asked for more you were considered "spoiled".

One of the most painful parts of growing up in a home that is centered around substance abuse is this- the people that harm you give you gifts: these can come in different ways. They give you praise to keep your mouth shut, and to keep living the way you are, which is in fear. With that said, my siblings and I had a lot of stuff. One of my parents was a shopaholic and hobbyolic. Which meant anytime something went wrong they would buy everything they possibly needed to create a project. Honestly if they would have just knew how to be profitable and turned it into a business they would have been a millionare 10X over.

Anyway I say all of this not to have anyone feel bad for me or treat me differently, I hate it when people feel bad for me. I'm a strong, business oriented, creative, independent woman, and a devoted woman to my faith so pity does not suit me well. However, I have come to realize that my story is one that 1 out of 4 children need to hear. There are thousands of kids that are worried sick about their lives and the same things that I had to worry about every day and it isn't a happy life either.

Being a child of a substance abuse home doesn't only make you stronger, it makes you understand that there is going to be a lot of ups and downs that are unpredictable Which is AMAZING for business. While this may prepare you for a superior amount of issues down the road you still have a lot of healing coming your way.

.........................................................................................................................

I'm known by all of my mentors as "a fighter" I am able to sniff and stomp problems out very quickly. I am witty and quick and have the ability to read almost every single situation from a third party perspective. I can train a fish to climb a tree, and a monkey how to swim. I am talented in many things,,,, but there are many things that I have had to face as a person who has suffered trauma these things.

1. No one is Watching You As Much As You Think: This was hard for me, because I have always sought the attention from people that never gave it to me, which is NOT healthy. What I've learned is that you have to be strong and do whatever it is FOR YOU. Especially when it comes to your liveliness.

2. Being Selfish is the best love: I didn't realize this at the time, but now that I am older I have realized that if I would have just did what I needed to to take care of myself, then I would have been able to treat others better. A therapist once told me this: People who grow up in situations with addictive behaviors: they never truly have their full needs met, so their versions of "selfish" are actually not selfish and this is evident in their day to day life whether it is emotionally, physically, mentally, or spiritually. They don't have room for them because they are sick, and when we leave those environments often times we repeat the behaviors that we once did. So you must be aware of what you are treating others like and how you are treating yourself because you will never be able to give until you are full.

3. Speak Up: If you have not sought any type of counseling, I would strongly encourage it. My parents both used to say that I needed to be put in a psyc ward after I asked them about what an asylum was. I often wish that they did, because I would have not had to go through the amount of reprogramming as an adult as I am now. If you have access to a counselor go and see someone. Talk to someone about it, do the right thing for yourself for once.

4. Gain An Amazing Support System: I can not speak this enough, make sure that you are aware of the people around you. Your brain and your support system is probably more important than your job. I say this because your support system is going to carry you through the week and help you find purpose.

5. Be Aware of Not Making Excuses for People: When I first started managing people, for some reason I had a sense of pride in being able to bring out the best in people that didn't work out better anywhere else. Although I was successful at it, it is exhausting. When people are late consistently, they are obviously not making something that needs to be a priority a priority. When they consistently eat poor foods, and they know the effects of the foods, sometimes you have to ask yourself - Can I have my time better suited? If the answer is yes, then you need to cut your losses and make sure that you do your best as a leader.

Before I go, I want you to remember two things. You can not control others and you can only control yourself.

That's all I have, if you guys have more questions about being successful after being around substance abuse DM me!

#tw: alcholism #addiction #recovery #mental help #entreprenuerlife #inspire #trauma #lifestyle

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memorylang · 4 years

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Meeting My Mongol Host Family | #40 | July 2020

As the second of my summer 2019 throwback trilogy, this time I detail experiences in rural Mongolia. As with my first summer throwback, these events took place in between summer adventures I’d shared last year. You can dive straight into the new stuff or read the past stories here: first weeks in Mongolia, comparisons to previous travels in Asia, my 22nd birthday and a trip to the capital and day-in-the-life moments.

Ceremonial Greetings for Foreigners in Mongolia

By my second week of June 2019, I've moved in with a Mongolian host family. We live in northern-central Mongolia’s Номгон /Nomgon/, a tiny town, home to only 2200 people. The town sits on one side of a two-lane paved road linking provinces. Across the road stands a fairly lone mountain, also named Номгон. Women aren’t to climb it, which is common for more sacred mountains. A large expanse of idyllic alternating crop fields spread between the road and the mountain, which has a Soviet train track before it.

Besides the picturesque fields, rails and peak visible in the distance, my town’s main feature is its box-shaped two-story school building. I think Soviets built it when they partially developed this area in the 1970s, but it’s painted lime green now. My fellow few Peace Corps Trainees in this town and I spend most of our days at school.

I spend extra time around our school, too, since my host parents work there. In fact, I first met them at school. When my fellow Trainees and I first arrived, we experienced ceremonial greetings with our host parents.

The sunny Saturday, June 8, my training cluster mates and I disembark our compact yellow bus to a small concrete area in front of the school. Here we find identically costumed children of all ages performing in unison for us. Mongolian families stand around the perimeter, watching. As our Resource Peace Corps Volunteer (PCV) would explain to us, Mongolian events always begin first with a series of song and dance performances.

The children dress in bright-colored traditional outfits. During one performance, a group in yellow with cyan play traditional stringed instruments. In another performance, dancers in seemingly pink with white for girls and green with white for boys perform moves reminiscent of traditional activities in Mongolia’s nomadic culture. After the performances, we hear a welcome speech from the school director (Mongolia’s equivalent of a principal). Then we follow inside our Resource PCV and a Mongolian we’ll later learn is one of our teachers.

My peers and I take seats at desk benches around the left edge of the room, with wide windows to our backs. Before us sit little bowls of candies and ааруул /ahh-roll/, lightly sweetened dairy-based nibbles. We’d learned just days before within Peace Corps culture sessions that these are common treats with Mongolian hospitality.

One by one, my peers and I get called to the front of a classroom for individual ceremonies introducing us to our host parents. Many host parents are young, around their mid-30s, which often sets us Trainees only about 10 to 15 years apart from them. My host folks are a tad older, though.

I step up to the front and greet mine. They’re in their late 40s, though their skin looks more worn than I'd have expected. They present me with a long blue scarf of possible silk (called a хадаг /hah-dahg/), along with a bowl of fermented mare’s milk. The sour mare’s milk is called айраг /ai-rahg/, with its ‘ai’ part sounding like ‘apple.’

Anyway, I’m a klutz, so I spill the айраг on the хадаг. Thankfully, my host parents are humorous, kind and loving. They forgive my blunder, we get a photo, and I seat again. Afterward, outside, we heave my luggage from the Peace Corps bus to their car. On a bumpy ride in under five minutes, my host mom swerves between potholes to reach my host family’s tiny house.

My Mongol Host Family, June 2019

Peace Corps counties vary in how they arrange housing and training. In Peace Corps Mongolia, we stay with a host family for three months in a rural part of the country before transferring to our two-year site, which is either rural slightly urban. There we live alone during our service. Some Trainees spend their host family summer in a Mongolian ger, others get a room in a house, and still others get a sort of shack on a host family’s property. I got a living room that had a lockable door, which makes it count as a Peace Corps room. My bed was a long couch. This is quite normal and lovely.

Although in English, I’d be the host son of my host family, in Mongolian, I’m the American son of my Монгол /Mongol/ family. So I’ll just call my host parents my Mongol parents instead. Dad translates to “аав” /ahhv/ while Mom is “ээж” /ehhj/.

My Mongol аав /ahhv/ is rather thin and shorter than me. He works as the local school's жижүүр /jee-JURE/. Translated as "steward," his job crosses between watchman, desk attendant and handyman. I see him some mornings on my way past his simple desk while walking to my language classroom.

My Mongol ээж /ehhj/ is a much stronger and bigger person than my Mongol аав. She teaches elementary school students. She's one of the few people in town to own a vehicle, so on rainy days she sometimes drives me to school, letting me skip my five-minute walk.

Like many vehicles in Mongolia, though, this one’s a fairly compact one from Korea. Opposite of America, the driver's seat is on the right side of the car. Despite this difference, drivers in Mongolia still drive on their roads’ right sides. Again, this is fairly common.

Besides my host parents, I also have host siblings. Younger siblings, regardless of gender, translate to “дүү” /dew/ in Mongolian. We also call both our younger host cousins and other younger children we address, “дүү” /dew/. To identify genders, we use Mongolian’s equivalent of “male дүү” and “female дүү.” Neat!

Anyway, within my host family, I have a rebellious 20-year-old male дүү and a mysterious 17-year-old female дүү. The teenage sister darts from sight my first weekend here. But, with Google Translate’s help, my college-aged brother explains she’s really shy. I hope she’ll open up. I also have a Mongol cousin I assume is somewhere between 11 and 12 years old. This дүү is energetic like me and ostensibly fearless, so he takes me on adventures before his return the city, mid-summer.

Rad Culture Quirks, June 2019

My energetic дүү came to greet my Peace Corps neighbor and me on our walk home from our first day of school. Along the way, my дүү kept making this neck slit motion with his finger, all excited. I felt perplexed.

Moments after I get home, I learn my host family’s brought a live goat or lamb to be cooked this evening for the ceremonial meal. Those intestines sure take getting used to, but I persevere. I later learn from my local teachers that my host family felt ecstatic that I tried everything!

As weeks go by, my cohort peers and I get used to seeing the occasional animal skulls and severed hooves in the dirt our walks around town. I find these less exciting than the time we saw, from our Peace Corps bus windows, a herder in the grassy hills guide animals by offroading a Prius. Usually, we’ll see herders riding motorcycles or simply horses when they’re not on foot. Mere days before, an American Peace Corps Mongolia staff member warned us we’d witness Mongolians with a Prius do things we’d never seen.

Anyway, the bus rides were just for transit between cities. For much of our training, we stick to our towns.

In town, among the first features I notice is the abundance of teeny brownish birds that hop about then move like a cloud. My host mom calls them something like ‘bolchimer.’ But, Googling “бөлчимэр шуу��ууд” gets me nowhere. Perhaps they’re Eurasian wrens. I often see them during mornings while praying my rosaries.

My host family and local teachers really respect my time for spiritual practices. These help center me amid changing conditions. Often, when locals ask what I do in my free time, I say I pray and journal. Indeed, I often keep a rosary on me during the day. My host family started assuming if I was alone in my room, I was probably praying. That felt nice.

A Chinese-American in Mongolia

After Mongolians learn a bit about me, they tend to regard me as an Asian-American, who just happens to speak Chinese, to have been to China and to have family there.

I notice a slight disconnect about me being ethnically Chinese. Evidently, I don’t look too obviously one ethnicity or another. I later read that Mongolians had traditionally held nationality solely in terms of the father’s side. In that sense, I’d be entirely American.

I also share photos from an album I’ve filled of my American and Chinese families, close friends, student life and travels. Every photo including a friend who’s female and Asian, they take her to be my girlfriend. Alas, I’m not that special.

To avoid possibly problematic situations, though, I only discuss my ethnicity, religion and politics when locals ask. (They really want Andrew Yang to win the election.) That said, since I mention I’m Catholic, some Mongolians would me ask about Biblical stories, usually from a literary standpoint. I’m happy to oblige. Though, I'm often more curious about Mongolian practices, such as the respecting of stone pile shrines I see atop mountains. I love learning from locals.

At last, I’ve a few stories to share from host family life and the countryside! Hopefully, you get some laughs and clearer ideas of how I spent my summer with limited internet. It felt quite memorable! Prepare for the outdoors.

The Boy on His Horse, June 2019

Before I left the States, my thesis mentor said Mongols are very resourceful and resilient. Peace Corps staff told us, as Volunteers, we must be likewise.

On the last day of June, my host family had taken me on a weekend trip to the countryside, where they introduced me to family friends who live in white dome-shaped gers (yurts) as herders. As we drove to leave, though, our car got stuck in the marshy mud. We tried using a large, firm log we found to push the car up. That broke the branch, but I found it a worthy effort.

After a while, my host parents sent me and my teenage sister to wait elsewhere while they spent the remaining sunlight to haul their car out with help from strong locals.

Nearing the third hour since we got stuck, my host sister and I were walking back across the marshes near sunset. As we walked, a younger Mongolia boy on his horse was chatting with my дүү. His family had been helping ours dig out the car.

I didn’t understand most of their conversation until the boy on his horse asked where I'm from. My host sister and I replied America. He seemed surprised I spoke Mongolian, so I said my usual qualifier, "жоохон жоохон" /jaaw-hawn/ (only a little).

Then then boy asked my host sister whether I was something like, "Хятад-Америк хүн" /Hyatad-Amerik hoon/. I hadn’t heard this phrase before. It seemed to me something like “Chinese-American.”

My дүү shook her head and replied she didn't know. I felt confused. For three weeks, we’d known each other. Shouldn’t she know? I wondered, maybe she was just covering for me. After all, many Mongolians despise Chinese people. Peace Corps generally advises us not to bring up being Chinese. But, my day felt long, and I didn’t feel like hiding.

So I smiled to the boy and replied, "Тийм" /teem/, I am.

And the boy on his horse didn’t seem too surprised. I felt relieved. A local had for the first time recognized my mixed ancestry on sight—And no harm came.

During late July, my Mongol ээж /ehhj/ would explain to me that her relatives had lived in China (the Inner Mongolia region, I believe). That day, we shared stories about our families’ lives in Mongolia’s neighbor nation. I had a great host family.

How to Bathe Without Running Water, Summer 2019

By late June and into July, I've grown used to bathing with my түмпэн /tomb-pen/ (washbasin). Here are the steps.

First, my host family or I start by boiling water with the electric kettle in the kitchen/dining area. We take one of many identical plastic stools and set my түмпэн basin on top. I’m usually set-up on the linoleum hallway floor serving as our house’s entryway. From here, I fill my түмпэн /tomb-pen/ basin with three or four pans of cold water from our family's barrel we cart refills into each week.

By the time I’ve finished filling my түмпэн /tomb-pen/ with cold water, I've usually set my orange bar of soap, yellow shampoo bottle and blue hand towel beside me, on top of my host family’s semi-automatic washing machine. They used to have me practice outdoors, but nowadays they have me wash inside.

Next, I take the water kettle off its heater and pour about three-fourths of its contents into my түмпэн. This cuts the cold water, making it go from frigid to warm. Then I retrieve a little cold water from the barrel for my rinse pan and pour in boiled water from the kettle to make the rinse pan warm, too.

Next, bathing! I take off my shirt and glasses, bend down to dip my hair in the water to soak it, and cup water to splash over my arms. I lean over my түмпэн the whole time. Next, I squirt shampoo between my fingers, rub that around my hair, behind my ears and all around my neck. Then, I take the bar of soap between my hands and lather that down and up my back, up and down my arms, plus across my chest and my face. Afterward, I take my rinse pan and pour the warm water over me before drying off with my little towel. I used to be very bad at rinsing all the shampoo out.

Shirt and glasses back on, I remove my түмпэн basin from the seat, set the basin on the ground, then I sit in the seat. Up next, I set my legs one-at-a-time into the түмпэн. I soak, lather, rinse and repeat. This part reminds me of Catholic Holy Week services when we wash each other's feet. I dry off again, dump out my түмпэн in the yard, move my cleaning things back to my room, then I’m done! The cycle repeats about three times a week.

Capital Adventures, July 2019

During my cohort’s train trip to the capital around my birthday, I experience my second encounter with someone who suspects I’m Chinese.

While aboard the overnight train, I was wearing my Chinese cultural shirt with the 漢 Hàn character on it, from my summer before in China. My Peace Corps peers and I were walking down the car to reach our beds. A child seemed surprised when my fellow Trainees explained I'm American, not Chinese—Neat experience.

Unrelated to ancestry, I also enjoyed borrowing a few books from Peace Corps Mongolia’s lending library. These help me learn more about Mongolia’s vast geography. The one region I didn’t look into was a more urban place that I figured wasn’t on the table for our potential assignments.

Besides borrowing books, I also got to hug Peace Corps staff again! That’s always a pleasure. I really missed hugs. Later that month, we celebrated with a cake to commemorate July birthdays like mine!

And lastly from the capital adventure, my peers and I explored a Tibetan Buddhist monastery. Its iconography looked a bit too gory and sensual for me. Later with my host family in July, I saw a Buddhist statue in Дархан /Darhan/, the nearest major city, and found that one tamer.

All things considered, my first capital adventures went well!

Language Oasis, July 2019

Long before I felt integrated into the rural community where I trained and taught during the summer, I hadn’t realized how starved I’d felt from not speaking Chinese. Here’s a wholesome story.

Since I came to Mongolia being originally considered for Peace Corps China, I spoke Chinese. But I worried—I heard many Mongolians dislike Chinese people. I’d probably few opportunities to speak the language. So, I focused strictly on trying to figure out Mongolian.

At one of many dusks during July, my second month in Mongolia, I was playing volleyball with my primary and secondary students on our basketball court, while my host sister talked to her friends. We usually saw the same kids every night. But this night was different.

One of my high school students, who speaks the best English, approached me with someone new. My student said her friend studies in Darkhan, which was why the girl hasn’t attended lessons I teach with my fellow Peace Corps Trainees. But, her friend studies Chinese.

I had the most unbelievable conversation!

I suddenly spoke Chinese again, with my student’s friend. But, I juggled Chinese with occasional Mongolian words, since they were top-of-mind the past two months. Then, when my student would speak, I responded to her in English. To the young children gathering around, I spoke Mongolian. (They asked if I was speaking Japanese, haha.) Wow!

As for what we talked about, the Chinese-learning friend asked what I thought of Mongolia and the children. Mongolians usually ask me these. But, her Chinese skills surpassed many Mongolians' English. I felt relieved to speak my truest joys to a Mongolian who understood my words. I love feeling understood.

The sun fell fast, for time flew. My host sister approached, handing back my language notebook and jacket, signaling time to head home. My student and her friend left with an elated trilingual farewell.

I hadn’t seen those students since the summer. But, I never forgot their kindness.

When Peace Corps Mongolia staff requested we Trainees write our placement preferences, I declared my interest in interest in using my Chinese skills, too, to serve Mongolians. The joy I felt being able to engage with that half of myself, I realized, could profoundly sustain me.

Chinese Food and Mongolia, July 2019

Fake news tends to circulate Mongolian media about Chinese poisoning food and products sent to Mongolia. While there’s possibly truth to some claims, many feel reminiscent of fake stories spread across Facebook in the U.S. about Russia. Still, some moments in Mongolia reminded me of China with twists.

My host family had taken me to Darhan to visit one of their friends and have delicious homemade soup dumplings with them. Then, they left me alone for a while. I noticed on the toothpicks label Chinese characters of my Chinese family's home province 湖南省。But, when I mentioned it, the Mongolians around me insisted it was Korean or Japanese. That felt weird.

On a brighter note, sometimes simply the way I eat carries more Chinese tendencies than I once thought. For example, my Mongolian host family usually asks me to mix my food when I have a plate of many things. But since my Chinese studies abroad, I’ve usually kept things separate, as Chinese tend to. Mongolians also seem pretty surprised whenever I order hot water at restaurants, rather than either tea or cold water. Hot water, again, is more a Chinese thing.

Mongolians even use the Western standard of forks and knives. They have sliced bread, in addition to rice and noodles. When Mongolians taught me the Mongolian word for chopsticks, they added that these are used by Chinese, Japanese and Korean people, not Mongols.

The cultural quirks aren't problems for me, just observations. I figure most of these had Soviet influences. Food notions were among my last reflections about China during my 2019 summer in Mongolia’s countryside.

Trials of Nature’s Commode, Summer 2019

This last story’s more for the gag, but it’s a Peace Corps staple experience. Welcome to the outhouse, among the first of many Peace Corps challenges. Luckily, I'd never lost a shoe or a phone like some people!

Let’s zoom back to the morning. I’ve risen from the couch in my host family’s locked living room where I sleep. Unlocking my door and unlatching our house’s wooden front door, I’ve stepped outside into the pre-dawn morn. Thankfully, I've avoided the guard dog and crossed the yard to the outhouse.

Most days, I simply knock on the outhouse’s metal door first. Then I open it to let the birds shoot out. (They used to spook me the first few times.) Then I enter. It's a long, long way down. At night, I cannot see the bottom. Over this towering chasm is but a plank. There is no chair. I stand aboard the plank while closing the door. The door doesn't lock, of course. If it's windy, I balance holding the door closed by its handle. It's only blown open once, but luckily no one was near!

Then I, as one would expect, remove the undergarments, assume a proper squat and try to take care of business. Thighs aching, I then rise from the business, toss my waste paper in a bucket to my left, return my undergarments, shove open the door (which often gets jammed), then I begin the journey back to the house, avoiding the dog and sometimes geese. Inside, I use our water dispenser to wash my hands—again, since we lack running water. But, it’s all doable.

This routine gets complicated on mornings after rain, since the outhouse gets bugs crawling around. One morning, I saw both a daddy-long-legs and a centipede! At least the door stays closed better after rain since the frame’s made of wood.

Of course, there are exceptions. Many Mongolian yards lack doors to the outhouses. Some places lack outhouses entirely. In those cases, we just use sand in the woods. Privacy is overrated, maybe. Just cover your tracks, and you're fine. Good times.

Coming Soon: Language Today and August Throwback!

Woohoo! You made it through the wild times.

I have one more summer 2019 throwback story queued, featuring host family farewells and Peace Corps Mongolia Swear-In experiences. Prior to these, I’ll catch you up on another round of how I’m faring amid COVID-19 in the States. I’m pleased to announce an exciting project!

Till then, August 9 marks the birthday of my late mother. I’ll be reflecting as usual. Take care, friend!

If you’d like more from last summer starting out in Mongolia, see these:

Summer’s Peace Corps Training Months 1 through 3 | May, June, July, August

My First Days in Peace Corps Mongolia | #37 | June 2020

Refresh Abroad as Student and Teacher | #1 | June 2019

Meeting My Mongol Host Family | #40 | July 2020

Horses and Global Adventures | #2 | July 2019

22nd Birthday! Наадам, City and Countryside | #3 | July 2019

Typical Day in the Training Life | #4 | August 2019

Farewells for 2019 Summer’s End | #41 | August 2020

As always, you can read from me here at DanielLang.me :)

#Peace Corps #Mongolia #memoir #story #Catholic #God #memoryLang #Chinese #summer #diversity #China #countryside #COVID-19 #throwback #culture shock #StayHome #WithMe #travel #train #family

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mubal4 · 5 years

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Wrestling – Life Lessons

When our oldest daughter was in 7th grade, Colonial Middle School, back in Plymouth Meeting, PA, she had a teacher by the name of Jason Taylor. Jason was the 7th & 8th grade gifted teacher. Well, that was his title I guess, but he was much, much more. Isabella would come home from school and talk about Mr. Taylor. “Dad, you guys sound so much alike. I keep telling him, ‘that is what my dad says,’ & ‘you sound like my dad.’” This happened over a course of several weeks and I had asked my wife about Jason. She had given me a bit of his background; was a teacher, left to become a financial advisor, and then left that to come back to this new role. Needless to say, my daughter and I were fortunate to have this opportunity. I first met Jason at Isabella’s parent/teacher conference and we immediately hit it off. At this point, I was well into my journey of change and transformation and Jason, well, he was way further along. He was incredibly wise, nurturing, patient, and willing to share; he was vulnerable, and this was with Bella too!! We met and spoke several times over Bella’s 7th grade year and collaborated on a few things. He made me feel safe and gave me courage to open up. He was very instrumental in my growth over those two years and I know for a fact, Isabella too. A couple of years ago, God called Jason after fighting brain cancer for a number of years. Isabella and I went to the services and the celebration of his life was powerful. He impacted so many people during his life and, he continues to do that today. Jason was gracious enough to leave so many, Isabella and I included, with many lessons; some of those are via memory and some, in writing. In my journal, I have a piece he wrote that I review every other month or so. You can see it in the picture above. Jason was a baseball player when he was younger and continued as a coach, volunteer, and supporter of areas organizations. His playing & coaching experience relates well to life, as you will read in the attached piece. I’ve been reading this several times each year and last month, I got the urge to share with you what wrestling has done for me in life. Although it will not be as eloquent and tightly written as Jason’s 😊, it is from the heart and with him in mind. I am grateful to have spent some time with him and Jason, I thank you for the impact you’ve had on my daughter, me, and my family. Also, thank you for giving me the guidance and courage to share my story.

Inspired by Jason Taylor:

Like many of my blog entries, I am going to attack this the same and just hit it head on, write from the heart, and see where this takes us 😊. I spent approximately 15-16 years wrestling and the most impactful, memorable, and where I feel I learned the most where from 7th grade through my senior year of high school. This all took place in Northeastern PA. When I was growing up and during these years, the wrestling community was a family. I am truly grateful for the opportunity I had wrestling Division 1 in college but the time, and the people in Abington Heights community were extremely poignant in who I am today. I do have to state that I am thankful to Mr. Pratico from Valley View. He was my first wrestling coach and got me, kept me involved during those younger days of t-shirts under my singlet and Keds Sneakers on my feet 😊. By the way, as I am writing this, I am working to find a picture of me wrestling and have engaged the help of my mother in the process. Hopefully by the time I post it we will have one, or, hopefully we don’t (lol)!! When I was in 5th grade, my family moved from Jessup, PA to Clarks Summit, PA. As I think back to that time, I was really clueless and don’t remember thinking much. I am sure my mom and dad can share stories of our adjustment and, having recently made a big move with my family, I am sure it was difficult for me at that age, as well as for my older siblings. But again, I don’t recall that. What I do remember is wrestling those earlier years and, maybe I am wrong, but as a 45-year-old man thinking back to this time 35 years ago, I remember feeling welcomed, embraced, and supported as the new kid. At this time, I had graduated from Keds to actual wrestling shoes…...I think 😊. Those first few years are sort of a blur and don’t remember details until 7th-8th grade. What I do remember though from 5th is meeting and become friends with the Cook family. They lived less than a mile from us and helped us out of a jam during our first winter in Chinchilla (look it up 😊). Our car stalled and Mr. Cook was there to toe us up the hill, with his 3 boys, Bob, Jimmy, and Kenny – all wrestlers. Bob was the oldest and Jimmy and Kenny a couple of years younger. Hell, I can go into pages and pages of stories about the four of us through the years and I know our parents can tell you some “real good stories too.” The actual truthful ones 😊. We met in a tow truck on Shady Lane Rd during a snowstorm and became brothers on the wrestling mat over the course of the next several years. What is crazy, when we are fortunate enough to get to see each other every so often, we pick up where we left off. These friendships grew and as we continued to become more involved in wrestling over the years, our “team” morphed and grew to family. My time over those 6-7 years were with the Cook’s, Evans’, Petty’s, Kresage’s, Pentasuglio’s, Tench’s, and a few years later the Shane’s. We had our coaches, John Diven was critical, not only as a coach but as a person. He helped me understand how to transition things I was learning on the mat to life. These relationships were not just in the wrestling room with us boys; our parents connected, our siblings new and supported us and each other. There were many nights out at the “team’s” homes after matches, at John K’s Pub, and on road trips being together. This is my perspective, we all have them, but as I look back, I am so very grateful for that time in my life. The sport of wrestling is special for what it has taught me and for how it has shaped me. But the people that I was blessed to have influence me during those years, because of my involvement in the sport, those Abington Heights folks, well THANK YOU! Some of those relationships are intact today, a few of them incredibly strong too! These aren’t folks that I met when was an adult. These are folks and families that I met when I was 10, 11 years old. I have known these people for the vast majority of my life and, when I am fortunate enough to see them, not as often as I would like, there is still a hug, a kiss, an embrace, and a welcoming in; just like it was so many years ago.

Today I see glimpses of it with my daughters being involved in gymnastics and soccer, respectfully. When we moved out to AZ is a prime example, they, and we, Robin and I, have been accepted as part of the team, the group if you will. And, I am starting to feel a semblance of that “family” atmosphere. It is good and I am sure over time that will grow. But, and maybe it is the wrestling community; hell, being a wrestler, you all want to say it, we aren’t all right in the head you know! 😊. Seriously though, there was something extraordinarily special about that time in my life, that community at Abington Heights, THE ENTIRE COMMUNITY TOO, the people and the support we had as a team. The support we gave each other. I was privileged to be part of such a special group of people and am grateful for the impact you have all had on my life. There are so many within that wrestling community but also within the community as a whole. Let’s face it, if those moments and people didn’t have an influence in my life, I wouldn’t be writing about it here. So, thank you, all of you!

As it relates to the sport of wrestling and what I learned, well, from above – support, love, acceptance. Welcome those from the outside with open arms; you never know the impact you will have on them or the impact they will have on you. Work your ass off and when you are spent, tired, and don’t feel like you can take one more step, take one more; then rest. Be kind and respectful. Respect your competition but be fearless when engaged in combat. Shake hands and pay homage to the person on the other side. He worked his ass off too. Be honorable in victory and humble in defeat. Learn from your mistakes and listen to your mentors. We may not want to admit it but there are sometimes we are scared to fail, and you know what, we will fail. But your team will be there to support you. Your coaches will be there to support you. Your family will be there to support you. Your entire “community” will be there to support you. Sometimes it is going to suck, it will be hard, and you won’t want to go out onto the mat. It is common and it is okay. But, go out onto the mat and don’t fear the outcome. Be the best you can, that day, where you are. Whatever the outcome, you will be better off for jumping in with both feet even when you are scared shitless. That is courage. Keep fighting and keep moving forward. DFQ!! You will lose and you will fail. YOU ARE NOT A LOSER AND YOU ARE NOT A FAILURE. When push comes to shove, you have a team behind you, a community behind you, a “family” behind you. They will support you and help you. However, when that light shines bright, the time will come when it is only you out there and where you go will all come down to the choices and decisions you make in that precise moment.

Photo cred of us, I believe in 8th grade to either Chad Reese, Shawn O’Malley, Bob Cook or Donna Cook 😊!!

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