#some of these are definitely better known but hopefully I got at least some you don't know already lol

[gloriousmonsters]

please recommend me horror vidya games

a quick list of ones I've enjoyed recently that I can remember!

Knock-knock. Made by the same people who made Pathologic, it centers on the Lodger, a weirdo who lives alone in the woods and does their best to maintain their house and record the world around them. But things are changing and going missing, nights begin to blur together, and it quickly becomes difficult to distinguish reality from nightmares. Excellent to play in a dimly lit room and give yourself anxiety, great 'woods creeping in' horror vibes.

SHUT IN is an excellent dark comedy/horror game exploring depression through a lens of 'there is something horribly wrong with your house that is really obstructing your quest to get some fresh air, also the narrator's an asshole'.

Endacopia is only a demo (though it looks like it got funded on Kickstarter, so fingers crossed we'll see more of it!) but I have to put it on here because I just find it so compelling. Guide a weird little kid in an exploration of his confusing, often hostile environment, with a aesthetic inspired by PC edutainment games.

Growing My Grandpa! (with a shoutout to the other games by this developer, Discover My Body and Water Womb World). A lonely little girl discovers the remnants of a bizarre experiment in her basement, and uses the dubious knowledge she gains to try and resurrect her dead grandpa, through... growing him out of black sludge in a burlap sack. Creepy with the potential to be kind of sweet, in a messed up way.

House. Described on Steam as 'survive the night in a house that's trying to kill you and your family' and yep, that about sums it up. Freaky and hits some good timeloop notes for me.

Mistrick is a tiny little RPG with Witch's House vibes, about a guy who gets out of prison and immediately gets hit by a car, and finds himself trapped in a fantastical pocket dimension with his previously-executed cellmate; he has a slim chance to return to life, and has to work for it while avoiding all the hilariously stupid ways to die. This one's more about the fun environment and extremely enjoyable dynamic between the dudes, but hey, Still Technically Horror.

Don't Toy With Me is a visual novel where you play the observing master of a dollhouse where a china doll named Dahlia lives alone (except for a silent stuffed rabbit). One day, you introduce a new doll to the closed environment. Cue slow burn, uncomfortable horrordrama, doll body horror, etc. Good if you just want a really upsetting time and some pretty art.

And this isn't recent and I feel like I've talked about it before lol, but *meme post voice* have you played the Strange Men series? you should play the Strange Men series. when will you play the Strange Men series

[stevieschrodinger]

Part One Nine

Eddie let Steve dry his hair after the shower. He knew Eddie understood the concept of the hair dryer, he’d felt it before and understood what it did. He’d watched Steve dry Eddie’s book after all, but practice and theory, apparently, can be very different.

Actually having the warm air pointed at Eddie’s head was not the same, and Eddie had, initially, behaved like a startled cat. It hadn’t helped that Steve had laughed so much he’d had to turn it off again and simply stand and wait for the laughter to pass.

He thought he had his shit back together but, no, one look at Eddie’s affronted face and he was gone again, actually crying tears of laughter. Eddie was much braver the second time, so they got there in the end.

They brush their teeth together, elbow to, well, more shoulder than elbow, in the mirror.

Eddie apparently has decided to just skip some steps tonight, and he has no compunction about getting straight into Steve’s bed.

Steve honestly doesn’t mind. He has genuinely slept better the last two night’s he’s spent with Eddie, and, well, he must just like the company.

There’s no breakfast this morning; Eddie is still sleeping. He’s pretty silent when he sleeps, no snoring or breathing sounds really, but Steve can feel that Eddie’s breathing just fine, considering Steve’s woken up spooning him, Eddie’s tail threaded back through Steve’s legs.

Steve has a face full of Eddie’s hair; the shampoo and conditioner routine are definitely making an improvement; Steve wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s soft, but it’s way better than the wiry mess it had been.

Steve rubs idle circles with his hand on Eddie’s tummy, and he can easily tell where the skin changes from...well, kind of human, to...kind of fish. It’s a little tougher, a little firmer.

Steve brings his hand up over what would be Eddie’s hip and back down; he thinks vaguely that he probably wouldn’t be touching like this if Eddie was equipped like a human.

Well, at least not without taking Eddie to dinner first.

Eddie shifts under Steve’s hand; waking up probably, so Steve withdraws. Except he can’t; Eddie gets Steve firmly by the wrist and puts his hand back, the message clear. When Steve doesn’t immediately move, Eddie moves Steve’s hand for him, tracing the same loop, “good, good,” Eddie tells him, “called?”

“Touch,” Steve says quietly to the back of Eddie’s head, “it’s called touch. I’m touching you.”

“Touch many many many good.”

Steve snorts a laugh, “that many goods is...perfect.”

“Perfect?”

“Good good good. Many many good. The most good. All the good. Perfect.”

Eddie makes an assessing noise, thinking, “Stee perfect.”

Steve snorts a laugh, but can also feel himself blushing with it, and hides his face against Eddie’s shoulder.

Eddie melts into the touch. Which, it makes sense really, doesn’t it? By the sound of it, Eddie was alone in the upside down, pretty much always fighting for his next meal, and then in that tank under Starcourt…Eddie’s probably never known a nice touch...well, ever. It makes sense he’d like it now.

Steve thinks Eddie may have actually fallen asleep again, his body is so lax and still, Steve himself snoozing a little, soothed by the hypnotic movements of his own hand, but then the phone rings and they both startle.

For a split second, Steve considers ignoring it, but he knows he can’t. Not with everything that’s happened; it could be important.

Steve sighs, sitting on the couch next to Eddie, trying to figure out what the fuck they’re going to do.

“Out?” Eddie asks again, pointing down the hall, “Eddidie not safe?”

“No, I know buddy, but you won’t be safe here either.” And fuck the pool should be drained for the winter by now, he’s going to have to do that too, before his parents get back tomorrow.

“Not safe Hawkins Indiana?” Eddie queries.

“It’s just for a few days, hopefully. I just need to figure out what to do, just let me think.”

Eddie sits quietly, plucking at the ruined bottom edge of his sweater.

Steve growls with frustration, “parents.”

“Parents?”

“Yeah buddy...uhm,” Steve gets a photo off the mantelpiece and brings it back, “this is my mum and dad.”

“Mum dad,” Eddie points, just like when he learned the kids names, “friends?”

“No. No not friends,” Eddie frowns tilting his head, “not safe?”

“Not safe for Eddie,” Steve confirms, “I’m going to have to call Hopper.”

“Grass Hopper?” Eddie immediately perks up. He’d followed one across the lawn when the weather was still warmer, and the memory has obviously stuck.

“No, different Hopper,” but Steve can’t help but smile.

Eddie perks up when the doorbell rings, “Hopper? Kids? Birdidie?”

“It’s Hopper, Buddy.”

Steve goes and gets the door, only when he opens it, he's greeted by Joyce and Hopper, “Oh. Hi, Joyce, I wasn’t, uhm, expecting you.”

“You have a mermaid from The Upside Down living in your pool and you think my boys didn’t tell me? After everything?”

“Right,” Steve says, backing up to let them both in, “so you knew too?”

“She rang me when Jon and Will confessed.”

“Right, no wonder you didn’t sound surprised.”

“Oh no,” Hopper takes off his coat, “I already knew, El told me the night Starcourt burned down.”

“Right,” Steve sighs, “of course.”

Hopper helps himself to a beer, eyeing the picture on the fridge, “Eddie drew it,” Steve tells him.

“Huh.”

Eddie sits patiently on the couch. Hopper eyes him like he might sprout tentacles any second, but Joyce says, “Hi Eddie, how are you?” In her kindest most motherly voice, and Steve knows he’s already won Joyce over without even doing anything.

“Hi. Good,” Eddie replies, and watching Eddie engage in conversation with a total stranger, even if it is only a few words, fills him with pride.

“Eddie, this is Joyce, and Hopper.”

“Joyce. Hopper.” He slurs a little over Joyce, but it’s more than recognizable.

“Joyce is Will and Jon’s mom. Hopper is El’s dad.”

Eddie frowns, and Steve recognizes Eddie’s processing face immediately, Eddie shakes his head, pointing at the mantle, “mom, dad.”

“Yeah, they’re my,” Steve taps his own chest, “mom and dad. Hopper is Els dad. Joyce is Wills mom.”

Steve almost sees the light bulb moment, when it clicks for Eddie what Steve means, “book,” Eddie leans over, retrieving his now really rather worn encyclopedia from amongst his stack of work books on the coffee table.

Hopper’s watching him like he might suddenly become a bomb that needs diffusing, but Joyce is learning forward in her chair, eyes kind and focused, hands clasped, clearly enamored of Eddie and what he’s doing.

“Stee?”

“Yeah Buddy?”

Eddie has the book open, and Steve leans over to look. It’s a page about frogs. The picture shows artfully drawn frogspawn, then tadpoles, then something Steve is just now learning is called a ‘froglet’, which is just basically a tiny frog with a tadpole tail, and then the final arrow points to a fully fledged frog.

Eddie points to the tadpoles, “El, Will, Stee,” and then he points to the big frog, “Hopper. Joyce. Mom. Dad.”

“Yeah Buddy, that’s right! You got it,” Eddie grins big and proud, finally figuring it out.

“Oh wow, he’s so clever, could he talk at all, when he first got here?”

“No. He didn’t understand anything, really.”

“Steve that’s so impressive, for him to come this far in, well, weeks, really, is amazing.”

And it has been pushing a couple of months, really, but yeah, Steve gets what Joyce means.

Eddie eyes Hopper and his drink, “Stee. Not later.”

It takes Steve a second, but he gets there, “no, but we could have later now.”

Eddie nods, so Steve goes and gets a beer. Both Hopper’s eyebrows are in his hairline, “you let him drink beer?”

“We only share one,” Steve says, a little defensively.

Eddie grasped the idea of going somewhere in the car really fast. That part was easy. Explaining that the tent needed to come down? Not so much.

Joyce and Hopper have gone again, Hopper with the promise of rearranging the cabin a little with El, and then getting Eddie appropriate groceries. Hopefully it’s only for a couple of days, but Steve has no idea with his parents.

He didn’t want to just send Eddie off with a stranger, even if it is Hopper, so he agreed to bring Eddie over this evening, after he set the pool draining and removed all traces of Eddie from the house.

He wanted to just put Eddie’s things in the bottom of his closet, show Eddie that he wasn’t getting rid of anything. That it would all be there for him when he gets back. Even the tent can be folded and squirreled away in the garage; even if Steve is already dreading putting the thing back up again.

Eddie had packed a bag with no problem, and then watched out of the window as Steve had put it in the car. There wasn’t much he wanted; his book and a coloring book, his walkie (with fresh batteries), some notebooks, his four jerseys and some pencils. His toothbrush.

Steve felt a little bad that Eddie hadn’t somehow accumulated more stuff, but Eddie didn’t seem fussed about it.

He seems fussed about this though, where he’s planted himself squarely in the mouth of the tent and just...won’t move.

He has his hands on what must be a vague approximation of where his hips would be, and Steve figures he’s done that to himself; there’s only one person Eddie could have picked that up from, and it’s him.

“Buddy,” Steve sighs, “we have to go to Hopper’s, okay? So I will put the tent back as soon as I can.”

“No.”

Steve gets up, goes and gets a box from the garage and brings it back. Eddie has stuck his head out to watch Steve, but otherwise hasn’t moved, “look, you can pack it yourself, okay? It’ll be safe, I promise. But we have to do this. No tent. Tent bad for Steve.”

“Why?”

Steve closes his eyes for a second, he really, truly, hates the ‘why?’

“Because...my dad he...he won’t like it. And it’ll be...bad.”

Steve doesn’t know how to explain that the house has to be exactly as they left it, even though the only come back for four weeks a year, if that.

“Bad?”

Steve nods, “dad might...be angry,” Eddie’s frown deepens, “he might...tell Steve bad.”

Eddie frowns, wrestling with the concept, “tell ow?”

“Yeah. Yeah probably,” Steve admits, even though he really doesn’t want to.

Eddie relents, backing up into the tent. He looks unhappy though, as he starts handing Steve things. Two folded towels; Steve replaces these periodically when Eddie brings him damp ones and asks for fresh ones. The slinky. The rubber duck. The Rubik's cube.

Eddie’s bucket, filled with short bits of twig, pine cones and tufts of dried grass, things that may have been flowers at some point.

An antler. Which Steve just, honestly, stares at for a minute, “where did you find this Buddy?”

Eddie points, “tree.”

“Right,” and Steve’s left wondering just how far Eddie goes when Steve’s not here. A delicate, perfectly clean, bird skull follows immediately after, and Steve decides to not even ask. He nestles it carefully in the bucket.

The ground mats follow, and then Steve watches as Eddie reaches up. He frees something from the middle pole, the one that runs across the top of the tent. A necklace, shining silver. Four rings follow, still tangled with the long stems of dried grass Eddie had used to fix them up there. Steve recognizes it all immediately; Eddie’s been in his parents room.

More specifically, his mothers jewellery box. Eddie looks so dejected, so guilty, “buddy, it’s okay, but I have to put these back. You know that, right?”

“In?” Eddie asks, pointing to the house.

“Yeah buddy but...you can have them back, after, okay?” Steve carefully slips Eddie’s treasure into his pocket.

Part Eleven

[ros3ybabe]

🎀 Overcoming Gym Anxiety 🎀

I got asked about this through my inbox by @sxfiaaa so I figured I'd make a post about it and hopefully help a lot of people with something I too used to struggle with!

🩷 Wear Comfortable Clothing

We've all seen the beautifully dressed people on Tiktok, Pinterest, etc in their matching sets and cutr gym clothes. If that is what you're comfortable wearing to the gym, do it! Wear it, and be confident in it! If you're more of a loose clothes/sweatpants/baggy shirts or hoodie type of person, do that! Wear whatever you feel comfortable (and cute) in, because the better you feel going into a workout, the more you'll be able to focus on your workout!

🩷 Know What You're Doing When You're There

This just means go in with a plan! You don't need to know how to use every single machine or do every single exercise known to mankind. Scroll tiktok or pinterest for some workout videos for inspo (please make sure the video you get inspo from shows proper form!!! Proper form is so important for being safe!!)

If you know you can go certain days of the week, make a workout split to follow that! EX 3 day split: Monday - Leg Day, Wednesday - Upper Body, Friday - Full Body

OR, if you just want to go do cardio, then plan for that! I didn't know how to use a treadmill, but I went to the gym at my university and stood on the treadmill til I figured it out!

🩷 Remember This

No one is going to look at you and judge you or think mean things about you. Everyone is at the gym for the purpose of bettering themselves and their health. If you find people giving you occasional glances, maybe it's because they don't recognize you from the gym (or they do recognize you from somewhere else), maybe their admiring your outfit/physique, maybe their avid gym goers who are watching your form and technique, or maybe their just zoned out and you happen to be in the line of sight.

When I'm at the gym, I look around between sets and take note on other people's form to see if maybe I should tweak the way I do a certain exercise, or I'm admiring another girls outfit or physique because there are a lot of beautiful women at the gym. Sometimes, I'm thinking "dang, they're lifting so heavy, how cool!" or "wow, their form is amazing, they really know what they're doing." I've never thought bad abut someone at the gym because why would I?

🩷 Don't Be Scared To Ask For Help

if there an exercise you really want to do but don't know how and videos aren't helping, ask someone around you who isn't in the middle of an exercise and looks like they may know. The guy at the gym doing upper body who has good biceps may be the right guy to ask about upper body exercises. The girl doing impeccable Bulgarian Split Squats might be the right person to ask for help with those types of movements. Just make sure they aren't in the middle of an exercise, because that can cause some unwanted issues, especially if they're mid-rep, that can turn into a safety issue.

People love to help people, especially at the gym. If you politely ask for help from someone, they may take it as a compliment that you think they look like a person who is knowledgeable on working out. I'd definitely be so flattered if someone asked me for help or advice at the gym!

🩷 Random Advice:

remember your why! no matter how anxious you are, remember why you're going! what are your goals, what do you hope to achieve, how proud will you feel after?

start small if you have to! if it's really anxiety inducing to start working out, make it your first goal to at least step into the gym. then 2nd goal, walk around the gym to get a feel for it. 3rd goal, maybe 5-10 minutes on a treadmill, and then keep building momentum each day.

be careful with the hours you go! there is such a thing as peak gym hours. It varies by place, but a lot of gyms are busy between 2pm and 6pm I've seen. I personally love going to the gym super early morning, it's a little less busy and I'm a morning person so it works out for me! If you can only go during peak hours, bring a friend or keep your headphones on and do your thing!

Bring a friend! If you're really anxious about going alone, bring a friend with similar goals! Sometimes it can be a lot nicer to learn something new with a friend then try and learn it on your own! Plus, it's like extra motivation and accountability!

Have a motivating pre workout routine. Play some music while getting ready, prep your bags, prep your playlist, get your workout itself figured out, and just keep yourself excited to go! I love blasting high-energy music that makes me feel like a baddie on my way to the gym.

I hope this was helpful!! My thoughts were everywhere but I tried to convey them as best as possible! I'm happy to answer any questions or offer more tips and advice, don't feel scared to ask! <3

til next time lovelies 🩷

[eddieschains]

Drift

TW// slight mentions of abandonment issues if you look closely, not proofread, fluff

Eddie was always a night owl. At least that’s what he told himself to make him feel better. But you knew it was more than that. Once the sun went down and he was left alone with his thoughts, they ran all around his head and wouldn’t stop.

He tried his hardest to sleep at a decent time, but he had given up years ago. Most of the time, he wasn’t able to drift off until Wayne got home. And considering he didn’t get home until about 3am, that was definitely a problem. But something about just knowing someone was there with him was enough to let himself drift off into the safety that was sleep.

You took notice immediately when you started dating. You would wake up in the middle of the night to get a drink or use the bathroom, and he’d still be awake. He always said he had woke up in the middle of the night too, but you knew that was a lie.

You tried to give him ways to help him sleep like humming his favorite songs over the phone at night, telling him to watch some boring cable movie, drinking sleepy time tea, and none of it worked. You hated seeing him so awfully tired in the morning, his eyes bloodshot and puffy from lack of relaxation. You just wanted him to be happy and healthy in every way possible.

Wayne had to go away on a work trip, leaving Eddie alone in the trailer at night. You knew that meant he wouldn’t be sleeping at all. You took it upon yourself to come over, at least for a few hours of the night to help hopefully soothe him to sleep before sneaking back home before your parents noticed you were gone.

You were both sat on the couch, holding each other under the blankets as you watched whatever late night show you landed on while channel surfing. You rested your head on his shoulder, looking up at him to see if there were signs of exhaustion yet.

“Feeling sleepy yet?” You ask quietly, rubbing your thumb over his wrist. He looks down at you with a soft smile, shaking his head and kissing the top of yours.

“No. But it’s okay, sweetheart. You know I don’t sleep until late.” He holds you closer to him, squeezing you a little bit tighter.

“Yeah, but then you wake up more tired than you should be.” You frown. “And Wayne is gone… I just don’t want you to be a walking zombie in the morning.”

“Honey, I’m a walking zombie every morning.” He chuckles, placing another kiss to your forehead. “Plus, you’ll be leaving soon too. Even if I fell asleep right now, you know i’d wake up eventually when I realize i’m alone.”

You sigh. You knew Eddie had a problem with being alone, and that it contributed to his sleeping problems. He just needed someone there with him to make him feel safe.

You decided that whatever trouble you would get in with your parents for not coming home was worth being able to take care of Eddie. You wiggle out of his grip and stand up, holding your hand out for his.

“C’mon. I have an idea.” You smile as he looks at you with furrowed brows. He grabs your hand and stands up with you, allowing you to lead him to his room.

You grab one of his favourite books, The Hobbit, and take a seat on his bed, patting the mattress to tell him to sit next to you.

He takes a seat next to you, pushing the hair out of your face and kissing your cheek. “What are you doing, baby?”

“Gonna read to you.” You say as if he should’ve already known. “M’not leaving until you fall asleep.”

“But your moms gonna get mad at you.” He answers concerningly, continuing to kiss your cheek down to your shoulder.

“Let her be. My boyfriend needs me.” You smile and turn to kiss him softly. “Now c’mere.” You pat your lap as he moves to lay his head in it.

You comb his hair out of his face with your fingers, massaging his scalp lightly as you open up the book.

“In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit…”

You continue reading before you start feeling tired yourself. Your yawns interrupting your reading, so you set the book down on the bedside table and play with Eddie’s hair some more.

You look down to see his eyes are closed, his breathing is steady and there’s a slight snore coming from him. You giggle to yourself and kiss the top of his head before pulling a blanket over the both of you, drifting off into sleep with him.

[leviafin]

Society and being Other

This was going to be a reblog of another post, but it got long and offtopic so it can have its own post now.

I don't hate or even dislike humans, and I don't think I fear them as a whole as much as I fear people or society as a whole. I partially identify as human--well, I used to be one? Still kind of am? Complicated, and not really the point. But I think an important thing to recognise is that any species has the capability to do harm. Keeping that in mind definitely keeps me away from misanthropic mindsets--something I'm very keen to avoid falling into the habit of. It kind of keeps me grounded, in a way. If we lived in an elven society, or a strictly alterhuman society, it might still be the same--or there'd be some other niche thing society hates and the cycle would likely repeat. I'm not above anyone for being nonhuman, there's just a different perspective around being in the minority.

But I think there's something to be said about the fear of being outside societal norm and still having to live in a society you cannot trust. See, people of all species tend to have a lean toward being scared or distrustful of things they don't understand. This isn't true all the time, but if you introduce something new and foriegn to any creature, they'd be right to be a bit wary in case it's a threat. People of all kinds can be much the same, and in some cases it can lead to... less than kind actions. And me? Well, in both of my sources I'm a human-turned-monster that people didn't really like the concept of, so lets just say that I'm very used to society and its treatment of those who are "other".

But now I'm here, in a human body again. I look human, act mostly human, but I'm still so many things that society just Does Not Like. I'm queer, I'm internally nonhuman, I'm a member of a system, and I'm disabled. It's why I love the label "alterhuman", it's a coverall for lots of little things and groups that might not have much of a voice if not united.

But the fear is absolutely there, despite having community online. The knowledge that I am different to most of those around me. The feeling that even if there were another nonhuman amongst those around me, they would likely slip under the radar to me as much as I would to them--we're both likely hiding ourselves more than we'd like to. It's being lonely with people who understand you sitting in the same room, never speaking to each other. The idea that not only am I visibly "other" in a sense of looking trans and using mobility aids, but I'm even more "other" than most would realise--and we already deal with enough for what is visible. The knowledge that some people really, really do not like those who are different. It is scary to think about.

But.. I've kind of decided to take the route of being open anyway. Personal decision that may or may not be a bit stupid, but it's my choice in the end. Feeling trapped gets better if you open yourself up in safer spaces and break down your own walls that are keeping you in. I've met IRL nonhumans because of this, who we wouldn't have known are nonhuman otherwise. It's a struggle sometimes of course, but it's working for us to some degree. A little bit of unmasking here and there, and then sometimes those others around you can look at you and go "you're like me", and that's incredibly valuable to us.

This turned into more of a rant than I intended, but... Yeah. Hopefully my point is clear, hah. It's lonely out there, and sometimes it takes a lot to make the right connections and end up in the right spaces. But it is possible to feel at least a little bit safer, given the right time and place. If people are scared of me or if they cringe or anything else, it's not my problem. I'm not here for them.

[bigtreefest]

Chapter 2: Cooks in the Kitchen

From: The Rainmaker Series

Pairing: Mob! Steve x Forensic Scientist! Reader

Summary: Everyone hates a backseat driver. And a surprise guest when you’re not at your best.

Word count: 3,234

Content/warnings: TW: dead body and all you would expect in forensic science, I tried to make this not graphic, mentions of bruising, mentions of torture and abuse, sassy and borderline mean reader, awkward Steve who overthinks, reluctant? flirting, allusions to and mentions of murder

Author’s Note: For my dearly beloved @krirebr please know that you’re loved and appreciated by us all. I hope this helps, just a little bit. (Extra angsty, hopefully to your tastes)😘

What I’m gonna say is Decks seems very on edge compared to how she was before. Her guard came up out of ‘nowhere?’ Hm, that’s weird… or is it?

Anyway, these are Loupe glasses, if you’re wondering. They let you see tiny things up close and at a better angle.

Comments, reblogs, asks, and any feedback is so welcome and appreciated. Thank you for reading!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

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After your weekend at the farm, Steve drove you home to return to your normal life. As much as you loved being out in the country, city life was definitely more your speed. You immediately went back to work and were happy to keep your busy routine going. Sure, a weekend away from screens and solvents was a breath of fresh air, but this was where you thrived.

Despite the way there were new, more outlandish cases to deal with, the days were surprisingly routine. Come in, visit a crime scene, run some tests, go home, do it again. You lived for that sort of zen. The detachment of simply putting your head down and getting to work was what you were used to, and then once you were home, it was like a sanctuary. You could lounge, pick up another hobby out of the thousand you’d already started, and crawl into your fresh sheets.

It’s not like you were entirely a hermit, though. You got along with your coworkers and would commonly joke around with them, but first and foremost, you were a proper worker, doing your job. When something really needed done, you’d lock down in the lab, music blasting, and crank out results.

Steve was the same way. He tried to keep his days as routine as possible, despite the way work brought something new everyday. Rival gangs needed monitored and law people needed bribed. Shipments and production needed to be kept on a tight schedule and up to pace with increasing demand.

There wasn’t much time for it, but he’d found certain images and memories start to take hold in his mind. They were different from the grade school ones of Bucky, or his times learning the ropes of his trade, or the first suit he’d ever worn. They were new, they were…warm? Lacked that same rigidity? They were of you. Driving his car effortlessly, petting a baby goat as it bleated happily, teaching him to dance…small, little moments that he couldn’t let go of, but he didn’t have time to replay enough.

He did his best to stay proper in his business dealings. Steve was known for his gentlemanly demeanor, truly a golden boy of the underground, or…at least as much of one as an individual could be given the legality loopholes he was constantly trying to jump through.

On the outside, he was smooth as a beach. Fluid with the crashes of waves this industry threw at him. He’d gotten good at rolling with the punches without a single blond hair out of place. But inside? It was a hurricane. The wind raged and echoed in his ears, putting him on edge. It was sensory overload.

Everyday, he found his attention wanting to wander more and more to that simpler time, not romanticizing it for the lack of pressing responsibility, but for the fact he spent genuine moments with someone who was unlike those in his world. Unlike the men so obsessed with maintaining their place on top or squashing others to get there. They were all about the money, but you were working for the people, and for the betterment of the city. To solve cases and give peace to families. And Steve knew he was all too often on the other side of that, even if he prided himself on only taking out the worst of the worst. The ones who deserved it. They were the ones endangering women and children, who to him, were the distastefully vulnerable and undeserving of wrath, despite the fates they were met with from the awful men Steve rid the world of. He wasn’t breaking his set of morals and rules, he was just breaking the law sometimes. Steve was a good man, he just happened to make his living doing bad things.

He didn’t have time to reflect on that right now, though. Things had seriously picked up in recent weeks. Bucky was soon to return, but it didn’t help that Steve felt like Lloyd was unrelentingly on their asses. Leading the organization when it came to the normal stuff was fine, but the extra protections Bucky was making him run, along with the extensive research and monitoring was already taking its toll. Steve was used to a lack of sleep, he basically lived on adrenaline and black coffee, but another night where he was fielding calls and sending out directives without a wink was causing his emotional guard to fall.

It was early morning as Steve sat at his desk. He’d ordered Sam to head out hours ago, but as the sun was cresting over the horizon, not even that searing glow could keep Steve’s tired mind at bay. The levees against the flood were weakened beyond belief. The hurricane was about to make landfall.

Just then, the phone rang. It was one of his contacts down at the police station. That wasn’t new, but the specific news was and Steve wanted to be there in person to get every bit of information he could... and perhaps catch a glimpse at the one person who could scratch that new itch in his brain. Maybe, finally, at least he could catch a nap in the car, as Steve called Gio to drive him over.

Over the couple weeks you’ve been back, you couldn’t help the way your mind wandered constantly, either. Even your favorite playlist couldn’t keep you on track, so you opted for silence, the scenes replaying of your time on the farm doing plenty to help you block out your surroundings.

You were working on a particularly difficult case currently. There was no time for distractions. The overcast sky just added to the ambiance of the feeling that something unusual was looming over you. You pulled yourself out of your thoughts, along with the keys from the ignition, and took a deep breath, letting it out sharply to get yourself ready. When you’d gotten out of the SUV and to the crime scene, Detective Lang greeted you.

“So I’ve got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?”

He guided you along the River walk and down the rocky shore where a victim laid, waves still lapping over her feet as photographers and cops gathered around the scene, surveying it for evidence. A small crowd had gathered along the pathway, held back by barricades and uniformed officers. At least you were here before the news crews.

“Bad news first, always. You know that.” You spoke with a purpose, slipping on your gloves after pushing up the sleeves of your department-issued windbreaker and cuffing your pants so they wouldn’t get wet.

“So far, looks like it was blunt force trauma with a side of torture. Very little evidence to go off of, especially considering there are no open wounds and the tools used for this kinda thing could be in any household.”

You crouched down by the body and immediately took note of the bruising. You hummed in acknowledgement and looked back up at the detective, his head framed by the cloudy, gray sky, the rising sun now hidden. Fitting for a tragedy like this. A woman your age subjected to that sort of an ending…

“And the good news?”

He sighed, looking up at the sky, hands on his hips, before he dropped his head back down towards you.

He winced. “Body’s fresh? Disposal doesn’t appear very well thought-out.”

You nodded and looked around for any piece of evidence that hadn’t washed away. He was right, it was gonna be difficult to pull many testable elements.

“Well, I’ll do the usual work-up, then, and let you know when you’re good to get everything over to the medical examiner.”

He curtly nodded and turned on his heel to speak with the witnesses before you began to pull out your kit, swabbing for anything of note.

After you finished collecting everything you could, you carefully slipped back through the background and away from the slew of reporters now blanketing the scene. Ugh, you hated those block heads. Especially Lucas Bell, the weird little ray of sunshine you went to school with growing up. For some reason, he thought the two of you were actually friends, despite never having even given him the signal you appreciated his presence. The worst part: you could tell he wasn’t hitting on you. He would genuinely seek you out at crime scenes, that gross happy smile on his face, calling you by the birth name almost no one used anymore in favor of your college nickname. Every time, it was, “hey, remember me, old pal? Great to see you! Any information you’re willing to share?” Who the hell was so chipper when their job was literally to report tragedies?

You bobbled your head as you mocked him to yourself and got back into your work SUV. Ugh, you hated that guy. And all the other reporters. You didn’t wanna be on camera. What if you wanted to work for the FBI one day? Huh? What then? Can’t have your face out there all willy nilly and then expect to be doing covert ops. Nope. You prepared to race back to the precinct, ready to drown yourself in an afternoon of attempting to suck evidence out of a cotton swab caked in river grime and essentially, air, if you could count that as evidence.

You drove back through the pouring rain. Another thing to be annoyed by. First, the longing for your simple weekend once again, then the intrusive thoughts about annoying little reporters, and now, the near-flooding on the roads. You could hear her in your head now, Bee saying “rain makes corn. It’s a good thing.” You rolled your eyes, to be honest, you liked the rainy atmosphere, but you know what rain also makes? Bad drivers. At this point, it was just best to get back to the lab, buckle down, and stay there, where no one could possibly bother you.

You were hours in to your intensive testing. Your spectrometry readings gave the smallest peaks, hard to say if the readings actually were something or just background noise. You were happy to put in the time, but something just felt…off. It was infuriating and not helping your mood, but you tried your best to keep it separated from work. It wasn’t perfect, but it was your best. Another small thing going wrong could push you over the edge, though.

You opted to just look at a small fabric sample, deciphering if there truly was some thread of note caught in the weave. You just needed to concentrate and you knew you could find something. You were purely focused and zoomed in, using your Loupe glasses, paired with several lamps overhead, with the highest hopes of even a shred of confirma-

“Decks? More like Specks.”

The sudden voice that echoed through the lab startled you, causing your head to shoot up and bump against one of the metal lamps.

“Ow!” At that same time, the forceps and piece of fabric flew out of your hands and onto the floor. It didn’t help that you knocked into your instrument tray on the way, sending all those onto the floor, as well.

Great, now you had to go to the stock room to find a new package of sterile ones. This was the last set left in the lab. You looked up from where you watched the evidence fall, rubbing your forehead with the back of your gloved hand, eyes narrow at the business man in a suit who was previously leaned against your doorway, now tentatively walking towards you to crouch on the ground.

“Steve, what the hell?” You trailed off for a second. “You and Bee really do have the same sense of humor. I thought she just told me that as a selling point.” It came out as an irritated growl. You rolled your eyes as you squatted down to start cleaning your mess.

Steve laughed. Selling point? Bee talked to you about him? And tried to make him appealing? He wasn’t sure why, but he felt a certain warmth in his stomach at that. He pushed it down as much as he could. Either way, he truly did get along well with her.

“Well you know what they say, birds of a feather and all.” He joined you near the floor after having grabbed a glove, picking up some stray instruments and placing them back in the metal holding tray.

You muttered lowly as you finally stood up and turned away from him, after grabbing the fabric off the floor gingerly and placing it in a plastic protective case. “More like wasps of a stinger.”

Steve disposed of his gloves and looked over the results on your computer. You quickly hit the keys to lock the screen, sure to cast him a nasty glare. The last thing you needed was to get accused of leaking evidence.

What was he doing here, anyway? With those broad shoulders and that skinny waist. What did he even need shoulders that big for? How did he even shop for clothes? You swear his waist was literally the same circumference as your thigh. They don’t carry stuff like that in department stores.

Steve looked at you with a confused glance as you removed your gloves and washed your hands. There was a hint of humor in his voice, but it was mostly filled with caution at your attitude.

“Um, I don’t really shop for clothes? I’ve got a tailor. He’s pretty good.”

After your hands were dry, you facepalmed harder than ever before. You couldn’t believe you said that out loud. Maybe you did need to interact with more people outside of work. You were too comfortable talking to yourself. You took a deep breath before turning around and looking at Steve again. His face now mostly held tentative kindness, and that was a nice change to the anger that was sitting in your belly all day today. You still couldn’t help what you spat back, though.

“You have a tailor? In this economy? Of course you do…rich prick.” The last part was grumbled under your breath, but Steve still caught it. Where was this hostility coming from? He thought the two of you had gotten along great before. What changed?

Steve’s hurt caused him to fire back, albeit much nicer than you had. “You’re calling me rich? Decks, I’ve seen your apartment, it’s nice. Especially for this city. Way nicer than my first place.”

First off, what was that supposed to mean? You were still suspicious about exactly what Steve and Bucky did for a living. You knew they made a lot of money. Steve wore designer suits, if he could help it, and you assumed Bucky did, as well, but what business did they have being this built?

You let go of that, though, wanting to just get back to work after the disturbance, but why had you been disturbed in the first place?

“Steven, what are you doing in my lab?”

He was taken aback. Woah, full names. He knew your full name, but didn’t dare to find out what would become of him if he used it. It didn’t seem like many did. He wanted to go about this the right way. He didn’t want abuse his delicate position as a friend of a friend when you were so close to the law…yet.

He stood upright and pressed his shoulders back. Right, he was here on business. He had to remember that. It wasn’t a personal call and he had to stay professional.

“I was actually meeting with Scott, er, Detective Lang. He called me about the new case that came in this morning.”

You nodded slowly. “You knew her?”

Why did that make you nervous? Of course Steve knew women, like, duh, but something burning rose in your chest in anticipation of his response. Why did you care? You didn’t even want him here. Right?

He shook his head lightly. “No…well, sort of? She was an employee of one of my businesses. A salon.”

One of his businesses, of course. A salon was…interesting… but you guessed not out of the question with how perfect his stupid perfect hair always was. Whatever, just because he was here for some questioning, doesn’t mean he had to pay you a visit.

“Okay…so why did you come in here?”

You looked up at him from the odds and ends you were shuffling around your work bench out of nervousness.

“I actually wanted to see you, maybe help out a little?”

You eyed him skeptically, ignoring the way your chest sent a tingle down towards your fingertips. “You know when someone offers to keep close to a case like that, it usually means they had something to do with it, right?”

Steve put his hands up in surrender. “I swear this wasn’t me. I just genuinely care for my employees. Did you check under the fingernails? Maybe there was some DNA there or something?”

Your gaze became even more burning towards him. “Yes, Steven. I checked under the nails. That’s like, the first thing you do in cases like this. But why would you know that, anyway? And how can you say you care so much about your employees if you didn’t even know the girl?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. He was usually much smoother than this. How did you intimidate him so much so suddenly. Oh no…Is that where the name ‘Decks’ came from? Were you gonna hit him? Deck him? Did you have a pension for beating guys up? If he made a wrong move, would you literally punch him? Give him a black eye? Sure, much worse had happened to him before, but he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to emotionally recover if the damage came from you.

Either way, Steve didn’t want to find out, so he continued quite cautiously and uncomfortable within your domain, lacking the confidence that came so easily to him in all his usual business dealings and the quasi-leadership role he found himself in.

“I um…I watch a lot of CSI shows?” He hoped that was believable, but he knew it came out like a squeak, almost. He may as well be a little kid losing fights in a back alley again. He cleared his throat in an attempt to get his voice back to normal. “I do care for my employees, though. And my reputation, and the ability to make sure nothing like this happens again to anyone involved with me.”

You sighed at that. You can understand the want to prevent future disasters, especially when it came to someone working so low at the bottom of the food chain for such a major company. As you slipped your Loupe glasses back on and readjusted your lamps, you gestured for Steve to take a seat in your computer chair while you moved to a stool by the lab bench.

“Okay, fine. I’ll let you hang around, but don’t tell me how to do my job.”

You couldn’t help the way the corner of your lip turned up, just out of Steve’s sight, as he strutted over and plopped down into the rolly chair, watching you with a smile and his fingers laced behind his head.

Next >

Bonus A/N: I’m very excited for what’s going to grow between Steve and Decks. She’s a lil independent thing and he’s just so “idk what to do bc I’m supposed to be in control but I’m doing everything on her terms” and I love it. Lmk what you think!!!

Series Taglist:

@evie-119

[roturo]

GOOD BOY GONE BAD

“Love is a lie, I love that lie.¨

⁙ synopsis: Gojo Satoru is known for his charms and for being a gentleman, for you? he´s not what they say.

warnings: smut, breeding kink, dacryphilia, biting, piv, blowjob (reader), enemies to lovers ¿? pwp, toxic gojo, dom!gojo satoru x fem!reader.

Gojo Satoru. The renowned sorcerer, the strongest man in the world. Plenty of women fight for this man, not only because he´s really appealing, might also be the most handsome man in the world, but,

he´s also a motherfuker.

The word might sound strong, and it is, but they couldn´t blame you. He´s for sure a gentlemen to any woman that appears in his sight, so... why he´s not a gentlemen to you too?

For what you can remember he was never nice to you, you both know each other for years now, both of you studied at the same school, not like there´s a lot of schools where they could teach you about cursed energy but fuck it, you were even neighbors at some point!

So, why couldn´t you get along with this man? Both of you come from strong clans, even though he´s alone... and stronger than you, but still, strong clans. You had friends in common!... more like just Nanami and Shoko, and also, you´ve never done anything to damage him or something?!

You definitely don´t like him, but his behavior towards you, gets you in your last nerves.

¨The higher ups said they´re dealing with it, so we´re finally free from this mission.¨ Gojo said with his annoying smirk, plopping down on the couch beside Nanami, clearly he got annoyed at his action, but what could he do? He´s Gojo fucking Satoru.

¨So, as an act of gratitude for you guys for helping me out with this mission, let´s go to the club together! It´s on me.¨

One thing Gojo has, is money. So, how could you say no to this offer?

You were dancing with Shoko at the club, you haven´t drank too much, preferring to stay sober. Nanami was sitting at the table accompanied with a pretty girl, drinking straight up vodka, you couldn´t understand how he liked it, but, well, he´s Nanami. And Gojo? Well, he definitely found some girl and its fucking her somewhere. At least that´s what you thought at the bar waiting for the waiter to bring you some water.

¨What´s a pretty girl like you doing here alone?¨ You looked to your left, finding a guy with light brown hair, and beautiful green eyes.

¨Nothing much, just spending some time with my friends here, guess I got a little tired and wanted to take a break from dancing.¨ You answered, now turning your body to have a better look of him.

He just smiled, and just in time his drink was served. ¨I like your eyes¨ Letting out a small smile to him, ¨Are they the prettiest eyes you ever seen?¨

Well, shit.

They´re definitely really pretty, but not the prettiest. As much as you hate your brain for thinking about Gojo and his fucking pretty eyes, you couldn´t deny it. ¨Definitely top 3¨ a lie. There´s no top 3 when Gojo´s eyes are that pretty. ¨At least I got in that top 3¨ His smirk reminded you of him, you know understand why this night has been really calm, that´s right, Gojo hasn´t made his appearance yet.

You´re not jealous for the fact that he´s probably giving the best sex to a girl he´s not ever going to see again, but maybe you´re jealous because he offered this hangout to be spending time together...

Another lie.

Let´s be honest here, this new guy was talking about some shit you really couldn´t give less than a fuck, but your eyes caught a pretty girl with a yellow dress on top of Gojo, moving her hips in circular motions while he just kissed her neck looking at you.

This man is a completely son of a bitch.

Well, you´re definitely jealous that he treats any women as the love of his life but not you. And most likely have a crush on him, but never in a million years you could accept that, so, hopefully you could erase that boy inside your heart then fill it with the wreck he has given you.

Maybe you´re not thinking straightly right now, but you couldn´t continue lying to yourself, and think you don´t love thin man, you had to just ditch it and break it. Find a new man, and maybe this was your time.

And that´s how everything started.

If you´re being honest, you can´t remember when you started kissing the guy infront of you, but you seriously had to get it out of you. Everything was going ´fine´ until you felt a force pushing you out of the guy, you just saw him on the floor, Gojo on top of him, clearly giving him a broken nose, and the yellow dress girl nowhere to be found.

¨What the fuck Gojo?!¨, Stop it!¨ You yelled at him, grabbing him from the arm getting him off the poor guy, his little black sunglasses where now on the floor and his beautiful blue eyes where now covered with black. You never saw him on this state before, neither this angry, he had some blood on his face and his breathing was unsteady.

He grabbed your arm in a way that would definitely leave bruises, and dragged you to a bathroom of the club.

¨Are you going to tell me what the fuck was that all about?¨ You pulled out your arm out off his reach now that both of you got into the bathroom. ¨You should explain to me why you were kissing that guy?!¨

¨It´s not like we´re in a fucking relationship Gojo! And you´re neither my dad to be telling me that!¨ Gojo just pushed you to the wall and locked you with his arms and, looked at you with dilated pupils.

¨All my life I couldn´t understand my hate towards you, you completely changed me when I was fragile, I spent hours in front of the mirror wanting to become you. I was killing myself with all the stress, and you were the most prettiest thing I saw in my life, you were outgoing, never giving up, strong and beautiful. I wanted to be as happy as you were, and find someone that could lighten a room like you did when you entered. No other girl has given me the light you let. Wanted to make me believe myself my love towards you was a lie, but oh man, you don´t know how much I loved that lie. And now? I'm saying it out loud.¨

You couldn´t believe what you were hearing, this wasn´t what you were expecting for Gojo to say, ¨And if i´m being honest with myself I can´t spend any-¨ He couldn´t finish his sentence when he felt your lips on his, finally he had a taste of you and he couldn´t stop himself from smiling while kissing. He grabbed your hips making you get closer to him, feeling now a hard bulge on you thighs.

¨Feel that?´¨ He left a small scoff ¨No other girl has made me this hard as fast as you did¨ He grabbed you and turned you around so you were standing in front of the mirror, kissing your jaw and neck, made your legs feel like jelly that you had to hold yourself on the sink.

You let out a small moan when you felt two fingers playing with your now wet panties, Gojo was on his knees behind you teasing your pussy, until he finally moved the panties aside and took a taste of you, making you moan at this. You were gripping the sink as hard as you could, knuckles turning white. ¨Oh shit, Gojo, more¨

He slapped your pussy making you whimper. ¨Satoru, call me Satoru baby.¨ He inserted two fingers inside you and curled them just right that he could hit that spot that made you see stars. ¨This pussy is mine, you understand that? No one´s else, mine.¨ He got up from the floor and started unbuckling his belt now freeing his cock, he ripped apart your panties and positioned himself.

He wasn´t even half in yet and you swear you could feel the tip of his cock in your throat, ¨All mine,¨ he groaned, ¨This pussy is all mine, shit, i´m going to make you all mine,¨ He thrusted his whole cock in you and started moving without giving you time to adjust. ¨You want that?, ´going to make you a mommy with all my cum inside you huh?¨ He left a small moan at the feeling of you squeezing his cock. ¨´Going to make you my housewife, my, fuck-¨ His thrusts started becoming harder when you felt yourself starting to cum, you started feeling yourself to climax while he grabbed you from the neck and you felt his chest pressed to your back, looking at yourself with the mirror.

¨You see that? No one is going to make you feel like this, you´re mine, my fucking cockslave¨ You could barely see yourself with your eyes covered with tears and blurry vision from the pleasure you were feeling. You felt you were coming but Gojo was not even thinking of stopping when you came, he began to thrust harder when you started to loose control of your body when the pleasure was becoming too much, just spitting out moans that were like screams, and murmuring words like ¨Satoru, more¨ ¨I´m yours¨ ¨Faster¨

Gojo bit your neck leaving a mark and started licking the small amount of blood he got out of it, you were full of bruises and purple hickeys all over your neck and legs, he´s definitely making sure you´re his.

You felt yourself coming back to life when he finally came hard and moaned your name. The overpleasure not leaving your body when he made sure his cum wasn´t going out your hole.

He cleaned you, and got you up in the sink, started kissing your whole face with small pecks and leaving small ¨I love you´s¨ making you smile.

´´So...¨

¨So... Can I take you out on a date?¨

[aliasrocket]

tdlr : quill/rocket love triangle qna + excerpts!!

Since the quill/rocket love triangle poll one by 0.01% (literally) I’m trying to make it happen! Definitely will have at LEAST one chapter out by the end of august, maybe even two, but allow me to answer some frequently asked questions.

Quill and Rocket are in love with the reader. (Because of this, I would prefer to call it a love angle but its a lesser known term, so.)

I don’t wanna spoil the plot too much but I saw a post of James Gunn on twitter confirming Quill is on space tinder. That’s the only clue I can give you (no, it’s not a chat fic.)

It’s not poly. Sorry for those who wanted it that way.

And last but not least, here’s two excerpts—it’s not much but that’s because I just started, but hopefully you get the feel of the fic from this HAHA

so the first one’s to give you some insight on Quill, second’s on Rocket ;

Books sound so much better when you recommend them to me

Peter

It’s books

There’s so many good ones out there that I haven’t read

I can take you to a bookstore if you want

Alright, if you insist

But I haven’t finished a book since

Since I last saw my mother

And you changed that

The bubble that held these words was the face of Peter—it was his face. The flat device on your phone was supposed to make up for the fact that you weren’t next to him.

Reading that through was like looking at a sunset and speculating its feelings. Obviously it’s a pretty sight. A lot of things happen when pink meets red meets orange meets yellow. But the sun doesn’t have a face. Neither do the colors. But your shoulders sink and your bones unwind at the very thought of letting your hair brush through the mellow sunset wind.

There was something there. Obviously, there was something there.

But Peter Quill was a chat screen with feelings.

I’m glad you liked Ready Player One Peter

I feel like a damn child again

With all the sci-fi you’ve recommended me

But in the good way

Like

I can let loose

With you

Yk?

“Hey uh,” you swallowed, the slick noises from your throat somehow bouncing off the walls. “The ship’s on autopilot, right?”

“No, we’re crashing any second now,” Rocket answered dryly.

You whipped around to face the window. More clanging sounds ensued, but the stars were still sticking to the sky, fixed, not moving, not dropping to shaking about—and there was no quake in the ship, no floating feeling of your body falling and yet your heart hiccuped.

Rocket snickered. Your heart drummed somewhat distantly in your chest, but as drums are, it was loud, and it ran a careless finger down your ribs.

“Of course we’re on autopilot, princess,” he clarified a little kinder, despite the gesture being anything but kind. It was considered kinder because whatever he had done previously had made this an improvement.

He loaded his hands into his pockets, leaning against the box with a foot crossed over the other.

You groaned as your head hit the mattress, and you did this instead of offering a response, an option you actually had to weigh.

“Never got the proper meeting, by the way,” Rocket said, his boots giving away each heavy step towards you. “I’m—”

“Rocket. I know who you are,” you finish for him so he doesn’t have the chance to say anything else that would scare you.

You reluctantly sat up only to find he was closer than you had expected him to be. Your feet suddenly gravitated towards the floor in an attempt to regain some modesty.

“This usually goes both ways, you know.”

You press your lips into a thin line, your eyelids drooping to form an unamused look. You utter your name but the syllables clung to your lips when they barely left you. Rocket held out his hand, and you take note of his black nails protruding from its slender but unmarred form. You take his hand in your own, shaking it torpidly and very, very slimly moving it for a better view.

It was unmarred in a very human way—it held prominent knuckles at the beginning of each finger, and it looked so unnaturally natural; his hands were active, always on the move, always touching very hot and dangerous things—how could it possibly be unmarred?

“Now you say ‘nice to meet you, Rocket,’” he quipped.

You hit his hand away and scoffed. “Yeah yeah, okay.”

“Nice to meet you too,” he said along with your name, leaving him like a cardboard box labeled ‘fragile.’ It’s an open box but it’s handled with care, something he steadily unpacked.

[lucy90712]

Road to recovery- Part 9

masterlist As Pablo was looking in my eyes I could feel butterflies in my stomach. He really makes me feel things I've never felt before. I've had stupid crushes on guys before but what I feel for Pablo is different I have real feelings for him. In that moment I just wanted to let all of my feelings out and deal with the consequences later but before I could the sensible side of my brain kicked in and told me not to do that as it was just an objectively bad idea. Eventually Pablo broke the eye contact so to help stop myself from saying something I'll regret I went right back to leaning my head on his shoulder. Unlike last time Pablo tensed up when my head rested against him so I moved slightly thinking I was hurting him but when I did he was just as tense so I stopped resting against him all together. 

I nearly started crying again thinking that there's no way he feels the same way I do. He was happy to comfort me but after that he didn't want me touching him anymore which hurt because it's so unlike Pablo. The whole time we've known each other he's been more than ok with physical contact between us but all of the sudden it seems like he doesn't want me near him. Maybe he can sense that I have feelings for him and he wants to distance himself as he doesn't feel the same way. The thought that this might be the beginning of him distancing himself from me really hurt; as much as the last few days have been difficult overall Pablo has made my life so much better and with him I've been so much happier so to be without him is really going to take a toll on me.

The longer we sat just in silence the more I felt like I had to get out of there. Something has changed between us and I don't think I like it and I definitely don't want to deal with it especially not right now. I could feel tears brimming at the edge of my eyes and I can't cry in front of Pablo again as he'll ask what's wrong and I can't tell him that I'm upset because he doesn't feel the same way I do. After some thinking I knew the best thing was for me to go home as then I can get some sleep and wake up in the morning hopefully less emotional so I can't think properly about everything that's happened today and what's best for me going forward. I wanted to text my brother to come and get me but my phone was in my bag which is by the door where I left it when I first arrived. After some internal debating I got myself up and went to make my way to get my phone as I really do need to get out of here for my own sanity. 

"Where are you going?" Pablo asked 

"To get my phone it's in my bag" I said 

"Is everything ok?" He asked 

"Yeah I'm just going to text my brother to come and get me" I said not having the energy to lie 

"Wait come back" he said taking me by surprise 

"God I don't even know how to say this" he muttered 

Hearing that made me panic was he really about to tell me that it's best if we spend some time apart or that we not be friends anymore. I was hoping if this was going to happen it could at least happen over time like a slow ghost sort of situation but I guess not. 

"It's ok I get it I'll just text my brother and he'll be here soon" I said not wanting to hear the words come from his mouth 

"No you don't get it I have feelings for you Lola like real feelings beyond what friends should feel for each other" he admitted 

It was a good thing that he got me to sit back down as I think I would've fainted if he said that when I was stood up. As it is my brain is already struggling to process what has just happened I really didn't expect Pablo to say he had feelings for me but deep down it's what I have been hoping to hear for weeks. While I was processing everything and letting it all sink in I couldn't help but let a smile creep onto my face as it felt like such a relief to know that I'm not the only one who's developed feelings between us. Just as I was about to say something I looked up and noticed that Pablo looked so anxious which made me realised that I'd spent quite a while thinking and he was probably dying inside.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't have said that I've ruined everything I get if you still want to leave and probably never see me again" Pablo rambled 

"Stop you haven't ruined anything I have feelings for you too you just took me by surprise I promise I feel exactly the same I can't put it into words but I feel something special for you" I interrupted him 

"Oh thank god I thought I'd ruined everything" he said 

We then fell into silence again. Neither of us knew what to do or what to say next. Clearly we both lack experience in admitting our feelings for someone as after getting that weight of our chests we didn't know what's supposed to happen next. I suppose things will never be the same as they were before now but I don't really know what this means for the future as right now we are just friends who have feelings for each other but we can't stay that way forever. I imagine the next logical step is to explore our feelings for each other by maybe going on a date but I feel like we spend so much time together that a date won't feel any different especially as there's no way we can go out anywhere together. 

No one tells you what to do when you finally admit that you have feelings for someone you're just supposed to know I guess. I suppose for other people it's different me and Pablo don't exactly have a normal relationship so things are different for us. We can't go out and get coffee or dinner together as I think we might break the internet and definitely my phone as it's just been hanging in there after we were seen at the game together. Going somewhere is what most people do for a first date so you can get to know the person you are going out with on a different level but Pablo and I already know so much about each other and have seen each other at our worst. The other option is something chill like a movie night but we do that together all the time as we have nothing else to do so how do you make that feel like a date and not just like we are hanging out like we would do any other day. There's also the worry of us not being compatible as a couple but I don't even want to think about that right now. 

"So what do we do now?" I asked 

"I want to have a proper date with you and I know we can't go out anywhere so would you want to come here and I'll set something up" he said 

"I'd love that" I replied 

"I know it won't be much different to what we do now but I'll try and make it special plus if we call it a date it will feel more like a date right" he laughed 

"I always think you have to say it to believe it" I joked 

"You best be ready it's going to be the best non date date you will have ever been on" he smiled 

"Oh wow I better prepare myself then" I laughed 

He told me to come over next Saturday and just so I don't forget that it's a date he set up an event in my calendar to remind me which he titles best date ever. As much as it won't be much different to what we do whenever we see each other the fact that Pablo is already trying to hard to make it special makes me excited to see where this all goes. 

[treason-and-plot]

REPLIES TO SAFFY LAMBASTING LIAM

@windermeresimblr

Wow! There's Saffy's backbone.

Yeah she's not known for holding back!

@drudragonrose

She's with a boy her own age that she actually likes. Be gone worm!

@ivorycrayon

Man, you write shades of grey so well. It’s hard to root for anybody, but it’s also hard to condemn anybody completely because all your characters’ actions are way too complex. “He’s wrong but..” “She shouldn’t have to deal with this but..” I could use your characters if I ever taught ethics class 😂 (except for Anita, that is, I always struggle to find any redeeming qualities in that lady :P)

Thank you so much Ash! I love writing morally grey characters who have questionable (but hopefully relatable) motives so it's extremely heartening to read your comment. And I love how steadfast you've always been in your opinion of Anita, lol!

@keoni-chan

I don't like this one bit. I hope Liam's brand new backbone doesn't evolve into an "if I can't have you..."-situation 😱

who knows what might have happened if fate hadn't intervened....

@dresdendarlin

Oooh it’s his snapping moment. He’s gonna do something drastic and crazier next.

@batsheba

Ok, now let's see if he, the creep Liam, can process this information?! Whatever happens I hope Saffy will be ok... I'm worried Liam will do something utterly stupid and potentially dangerous.

@oasislandingresident

Ooooh shit's about to go down!!! 🍿

@kimmiessimmies

I'm with @batsheba, this is not going to go down well with Liam...

@wannabecatwriter

Be careful, Saffron. He's in a weird mindstate now.

@bool-prop

Oh no. He's going to snap.

@muses-circle

🤦

@muses-circle

Liam will either have a meltdown right there, in the parking lot, or he'll wait until he's in the middle of class and doing something worse. I'm worried about what his breaking point will look like.

@muses-circle

And Saffron, men DO leave their wives. It's call divorce, honey. Life isn't as black and white as you think.

I didn't write Saffy's speech very well...what she was trying to say was that it's a well-known fact that married men never leave their wives for their side-pieces! She was actually quite enraged that Liam turned out to be the statistical anomaly, lol. That was the last thing she wanted to happen!

@echoweaver

Woo. Saffron's right, but wow she's still got so much growing up to do. OTOH, Liam seemed to be with her in large part because she verbally abused him. It's such a messed up puppy.

Yeah, he seems to derive a perverse satisfaction from being the victim and indulging in self-defeating behaviour. It's also not an accident that the two women in his life routinely humiliate and criticise him.😬

@sweetnovember77

Saffy's words can devastate ANYONE with strong emotions toward another person. It's like a knife to the heart.

Yeah, Saffy can be very acid-tongued. He probably deserved the wake up call but Saffy can count herself very lucky he didn't snap or do something as drastic as Stephanie.

@anamoon63

😮 This is not going to end well. I wish Saffy had been a little more diplomatic. 😔

It definitely did not end well, but fortunately for Saffy she was not the one who was impacted the most! I hope at the very least she learns some important life lessons from this whole sorry experience.

@simsaralove

I really hope this will make Mr. Yucky realize he better go live in the Twinbrook swamps and not make him do something stupid and ruin Saffy’s happiness 😭

@justanothersimsblog

I'd tell her to slap him but I think he likes that so... maybe knee him in the balls then lol

lol he is such a pathetic masochist that he would probably enjoy that too!😆

@greywardenconsort

He's a monster thru & thru

A sad, spineless, loser monster.

@streetlites

That's gotta sting. Bwahahah. Also, what did he think she was going to do? Leap into his arms? She was never like that toward him to begin with.

@mysimsloveaffair

They are both better off without each other. Saffy is doing him a favor and he doesn't even know it. SMH

Liam was always doomed by his poor life decisions and victim mentality. I'm also thinking that it was possible he had affairs as a passive-aggressive form of revenge, but didn't count on falling so heavily for Saffy. In any case, I think he got what he deserved.

[onthewaytosomewhere]

Espresso Martini for whatever rwrb ship strikes your fancy!

ok so i got a lot of espresso martini requests i just so happens i have one that will fit with this and not the other 2 so here we go

@duchessdepolignaca03 requested

---- so what we have here is firstprince but alex and philip meeting up

Alex is uncertain about this whole meeting, but he knows that Phillip has been trying, and Henry and Bea are both hopeful for some semblance of the relationship they used to have. So, here he is, about to enter the pub Philip picked out. He takes a deep breath, puts on his best not-quite-press smile, and walks through the door. He looks around the room and sees Philip sitting at a table at the back of the room. Alex walks towards him and watches as Philip turns his phone off and slips it to the side of the table.

He stops at the edge of the table, and Philip smiles up at him, “Alex, thanks for coming,” he gestures to the bench across from him. Alex sits down, and Philip slides the espresso martini across to him; it’s still cold, so it was recently ordered. Alex raises his eyebrow, and Philip shrugs, “Henry wouldn’t shut up for months about your love for coffee, so I figured this was a safe bet. The barkeep definitely laughed at me for ordering it, so please tell me you’ll drink it.”

Alex looks down at the drink in front of him, “Yeah, sure, I like a good espresso martini. Hopefully, y’all know how to make them here.”

“I’ve never had a bad drink here.”

The silence between them is awkward. Alex knows he should say something; he knows that Philip is owed an explanation, but he’s unsure how to start. He’s saved from having to say anything when Philip speaks.

“Alex … I suppose I would have ordered the espresso martini anyway; I remember your fascination with coffee without Henry having to bring it up every time I was at breakfast with him. Does he know?”

“That I’m here right now? That once upon a time, I considered you a friend? Yes, he also knows that, although he’s not sure how that could be. I guess I got lucky. I knew you when your Gran was just starting to get her claws so deep into you.”

“I’m sure it also helped that you met me after you met Henry at the Olympics, and what did you call him a pompous dick or something like that? So, of course, you expected me to be horrible, so it wasn’t a high bar to be better than you expected.” Philip raises his eyebrow in the same way that Alex thought was utterly annoying the first time they met, at some party after his mother won the election. He still finds it annoying, but it’s almost funny how it’s the least irritating thing about the man Philip became.

“Yeah, your brother definitely helped you out in that regard. Although maybe I just have a weakness for Fox men, your father was undeniably hot, and both you and Henry have some features in common with him. Although, I guess it’s probably good I didn’t have my bi-awakening with you. Martha would be even more unhappy with me.” Alex chuckles as he takes a drink of the martini at the appalled look on Philip’s face.

“Yeah, though, to be fair, she was trying to tell me there was something between the two of you back then. I didn’t want to hear it. I guess I assumed that even if we weren’t necessarily as close as we had been for a while there, you would have told me. Although it is pretty par for the course for you not to have known it yourself.” Philip shakes his head as if he can’t believe it and Alex takes another drink to avoid laughing. “Do I want to even know how you figured it out?”

“Well, you remember how Henry and Pez came to our New Year’s Eve party?” Philip nods, and Alex continues, “Well, Henry kissed me, and I found myself kissing him back. And then he ran back here and wouldn’t talk to me.”

“Wait, wasn’t he your guest at that dinner with the Prime Minister not long after that?” Philip looks as if he’s attempting to figure something out but is unsure if he really wants the answer.

Alex smirks and says, “Yes, he was,” with every bit of filthy implication he can pack into the three words.

“Ugh. I do not need to know what you are implying right now.”

Alex laughs and sees some heads turn their way out of the corner of his eye. “Well, I’m sure you were taught, with all your fancy education, not to ask questions you don’t want the answer to.”

“Well, I guess it does prove that I could have never been your bi-awakening, no matter how much you think I share any amount of looks with him or my father. I forgot you had a thing for Dad’s Bond movies; how does Henry take that?”

Alex chuckles, remembering the first time he had brought up how hot Arthur Fox was to Henry. “Well, better now than he used to. We actually watch them sometimes, which I think helps him feel a little bit closer; sometimes, I can get him to tell me stories about some of the ones he was on set for at some point during filming.”

They continue talking, and before Alex knows it, he’s on his third martini. It feels almost like he’s there with the Philip he knew a few years ago. He knows it will take a while, but he’s willing to help the Fox siblings work their stuff out; he knows Henry really wants it.

They’re leaving the bar, and before Philip turns to head toward his car, Alex says, “He loves you, ya know.” At Philip’s confused look, he says, “Henry, he loves you, so maybe figure your shit out so he can have his brother.” He turns and heads toward the car, waiting for him before Philip can answer, anxious to return to Henry.

[askbrozone]

OFFICIAL BRO ZONE INTERVIEW:

Interviewer: Bro Zone! So good to see all back together after twenty years of being apart! How does it feel?

Floyd: nerve wracking but it’s awesome to be together again

Interviewer: I mean this isn’t only just a band reunion, it’s a family reunion-literally!

John Dory: yep, haven’t spoken to each other in 2 decades and now here we are again!

Interviewer: was getting the band back together something you all decided easily or what was the process?

Floyd: Well it was just because of that whole thing going on in mount rageous with the twins, but then you know as the months went on and we hung out more we where all kind of like-man I really missed making music together

Clay: yeah and then Queen Poppy came to us like “hey do you wanna perform for your fans, ? Let them know you’re together again, theres a lot fans here that have been fans since the 90’s” and we couldn’t say no of course and performing again on stage on vacay island was just so, Exhilarating, I had that exact same feeling when we where in mount rageous doing the perfect family harmony, just like “man I’ve really missed this” the energy, the cheering

Interviewer: speaking of the Queen-Branch!

Branch: ha yeah

Interviewer: Cutest couple ever, I mean, pop star and queen of pop? What could be better

Branch: it really is something huh?

Interviewer: did she know at all?

Branch: nope, but to be fair, I didn’t tell anyone at all

Interviewer: you also recently revealed that you’re in another majorly famous boy group, Kismet, and you where the beloved hidden fifth member! How did you manage to keep that a secret?

Branch: honestly, I have no idea, pure luck to be honest

Interviewer: so branch has been out saving the world and being a pop star. What about everyone else? Floyd I know you’ve toured and released some solo music

Floyd: yep! Probably won’t be anything for a bit while we work on our stuff as a group bit hopefully I can find time to get new solo stuff in

Clay: Princess Viva and I where co running a group of pop trolls who hadn’t made it through the tunnels during the escape

Interviewer: so what’s you relationship with the princess?

Clay: announcing it here for the first time by the way-we’re actually engaged

Interviewer: Wow congrats!! So seems like you two have the same type

Branch: haha yeah, took me by surprise when I found out him and viva had been dating

Interviewer: and Bruce-the heartthrob, first to start a family?

Bruce: haha yeah! 15 years together…13 kids

Interviewer: how did you stumble upon the island? I mean it outside of trollstopia right?

Bruce: yeah it’s on an island…i just, walked you know? Just kept walking until I made it to the ocean then I traveled across until I found an island which so happened to be vacay island and I’ve lived there ever since

Interviewer: John Dory-I think besides Clay the least is known about your whereabouts, what have you been up to?

John Dory: living off the grid man-Hiking, surviving the wild

Interviewer: is it weird going from that to this?

John Dory: extremely

Interviewer: I’ve noticed compared to your interviews twenty something years ago, you aren’t speaking as much as back then

John Dory: yeah, I learned that I need to give my brothers a chance to speak instead of speaking for them

Floyd: he’s growing

Interviewer: of course I’ve gotta ask-is there an album in the works? Maybe a tour?

John Dory: no tour yet, we want Floyd healed up 100% but hopefully soon we can

Branch: but we can say we do have something else cooking in the studio, But I can say along with that we will be releasing our song Family that we performed at our reunion show as a proper studio single coming very soon

Interviewer: well I’m super excited and I know all your fans are excited as well-are you guys surprised that your fans from 1993-1999 are still here obsessed

Clay: oh definitely, I thought we would’ve faded out by now but we got to the village and the reaction was insane-and all the fans singing along and cheering for us at the show was wild

Bruce: yes, and we want to say thank you to the fans for never giving up on us even when we gave up on each other

Floyd: we promise to make everyone proud with our new music and the new era of BroZone

Interviewer: well thank you all for taking the time to speak with me today

John Dory: thank you for having us!

Interviewer: and I will be making sure I get tickets to every show

[marzs-space]

Impartial sins

Chapter 3: Kidnapped and not my fault

Check my M!List for more! Here

Previously... Next..

Warnings: language, mentions of weapons, mentions of drugs, mentions of starvation, short. If I missed something let me know! If you are uncomfortable with this, don't read!

Recap: I put ice in the bag and grab a paper towel wrapping the bag in it. “Since you can sense pain, can you make sure we don't get burnt with ice?” I ask. He gasps “I get to take control!?” I groan “yes and if you can do this, I'll start letting you out more” I say.

He squeals, “I won't let you down!” He says.

---------------

Azrial POV -

Ace is letting me out of the headspace! I can't let him down or mess up, plus he said he'll let me out more if I don't mess up! I press the ice to my mouth, just don't mess up. How can I? I think to myself as I take a step towards the couch.

Am I falling!? I quickly regain my balance as I stare at unfamiliar faces. Calm down, find out what their intentions are… I stare at the one with red hair named… diavolo I think. Strongest emotions… people aren't this hard to read usually…

Then again, he isn't really a human. Ok… happiness and nervousness. Lucifer's strongest emotions are annoyance and trust. Huh… strange pair of emotions.. I quickly analyze the others and realize they have no cruel intentions.

At least right now… Hopefully never. Focus, Azrial! I blink a few times and take in what they say. Man, Ace is gonna be pissed about this.. at least it wasn't my fault! Plus he's definitely gonna let me out more now!

-------------

Man… talking to people is draining… Fuck! I left our bag…. I'll just teleport it. I quickly teleport my bag to me and move to sit on the bed. I let out a shaky breath as a burning sensation fills my eye. “Hey, Ace…” I say shakily.

He sighs “I know, I know… let me out, I need to stretch” I whine before I return to the headspace.

Ace POV

I groan and get up, I swear luck isn't on my side. I think to myself as I crack my back. That feels better but it still hurts… I need to shower, where are my clothes? Oh, damn, I'm stupid.

-------------

That feels better… I feel clean. I sit on my bed and get on my ‘human’ phone. I can't believe I have to go back to school… Why is that what I focus on out of everything in this situation? I'll just listen to music while I try to send my playlist to my D.D.D.

This is gonna take a while… I'll go get some snacks. I put my phone in my pocket and walk out of my room. I head down stairs and to the kitchen, snacks! I open the fridge, no food… oh well, I should have some in my bag.

If not, it's fine. Had no food for a full week when I was younger. I'll be fine. “That doesn't make it any better Ace” Azrial says. I hum as I head back upstairs “oh well” he huffs but says nothing more. I go into my room and close the door.

I check my bag and rummage around. That's my gun.. knife… cigarettes… Food! I need to clean out my bag, better yet, organize it. I'll do it after I send my playlist, which shouldn't take long… let me see what my number is…

I type in my number and send my playlist. Got it! Now let me save my numbers… ok! Now for me to clean out my bag.. I connect my headphones and blast my music. Let's see what's in here… I dump my bag's contents on the floor.

Hopefully this doesn't take long…

--------------

Surprisingly it didn't… It's only 2am! “It's been two hours Ace…” Az says. Fuck… I place my bag on the chair at my desk and collapse on my bed. Maybe I'll be able to sleep tonight… I sigh as I sink into my bed.

Sleep…

Fun fact: Azrial is known as a lucky charm due to his happy go lucky personality.

Taglist: @cuddlybelphie @doomsday-fae @a-crazy-little-goblin

[ziamln]

Long ramble post. [1D]

I’m feeling nostalgic, overanalysing shit, and bored on a Thursday night with nothing to do. You can read this or skip over it, especially if you disagree, I’m not looking for drama. This will probably be messy and incoherent with 0 structure. For those of you who weren’t there during the 1D era, this may be confusing, particularly if you weren’t there during the shit storm that was 2015/16. Again, feel free to skip this, as it will be long and probably won't make sense, but this is my blog so you don’t necessarily have to agree with me. Before I go into this I feel like I need to clarify, I am proud of all 5 boys and their solo careers, I support them all wholeheartedly, and my saying I miss OT5 doesn’t mean I don’t. some things are facts stated by the boys others are merely a speculation or my own deduction from what has been implied or reading between the lines, just to put that out there. Bear in mind I am a Ziam blog, Liam and Zayn have always been my focal point, and always will be and I also have a Louis [& slight Larry] bias so, do what you will with that information. Basically feel free to skip!

It was so good to see Zayn in an interview after so long [I can't lie it's so weird hearing people commenting on his talking voice as something new and unusual], but hopefully, he’ll actually get better promo for this upcoming album, I’m super excited either way, his music is rarely short of anything but a masterpiece. But there’s a line in Zayn’s recent podcast which stuck out to me.

Personally, I found this intriguing, because at least to me, I feel as though it explains quite a few things. Particularly regarding Zouiam [Zayn, Louis and Liam], I’m not saying it didn’t apply to Niall or Harry but, I feel like it provides some sort of perspective on things others have speculated on, and also some things I have speculated on. Again, this is merely a speculation on my part, you don’t have to agree [scrolling is very easy]. I will not claim to know as much as I may have known about all 5 of them as I did 8 years ago, admittedly, though I support most of the boys through listening to their music, I don’t pay much attention beyond that to anyone other than Zayn, Liam and sometimes Louis, this isn’t to say I don’t like Niall, I enjoy his music or Harry, I have always been a Ziam/ Zouiam account and have always stuck to them, and as solo artists, I prefer their music, even during their time as a band. [As I’m sure many have a preference for the other boys. I don’t see an issue with it unless it is purposefully disrespectful or hateful to others.]

I know a lot of people are stuck on the line of how after ‘5 years together they all got sick of one another’, which is understandable and perhaps almost inevitable. [Personally, as someone with a sibling I definitely understand the sentiment] I don’t see any malice or drama in it, it would naturally happen to anyone after so many years of constantly being together, with barely any breaks and performing together non-stop for almost 5 years. It would catch up to even the most patient of people, especially considering how they were literally teenagers/ young adults the whole time. Nothing he said in that interview was hateful at all.

Also not to dismiss his line about how he said "I completely selfishly wanted to be the first person to go and make my own record." with this, whilst I’m not saying it’s untrue because it could be true that that's what happened. But I can’t deny its a little confusing because of the number of times the story of his reasoning for leaving the band has been changed throughout the years, initially, it started as him citing stress and saying he wanted to be a ‘normal 22-year-old’, then it was that he said there was ‘never any room for me to experiment creatively’ made sense as it was rumoured that his writing had been snubbed on Four and it could possibly be a mixture of all the reasons combined. But my point is we have been given many different reasons, but we will probably never know the full truth, so at this point, it's anyone’s guess as to what the actual reasoning was.

Of course, there is no doubt that behind the scenes of the entire One Direction era was a complete shit show, as has been stated/ hinted at by most if not all members at this point in some way, shape or form. So we can only begin to imagine the stress and pressure they were constantly put through. There is a lot we don’t know about that time, and probably never will. Some things are perhaps even traumatic for the boys who had to go through it, all we can do is speculate and be as supportive as possible as fans. 

I mean I feel like this trauma has presented itself in different ways with each member, perhaps in ways we will never know, Zayn himself has stated that we could never understand that time as it is something only they would get. 

In terms of image and what they show; Niall is quiet, unproblematic and as far as I’m aware he seems pretty much like, other than his music and tours, he keeps to himself. Harry from my impression, is a loudly quiet person, by this I mean, he comes across as loud as though he divulges a lot, people may claim he is the one who people have the most knowledge of, which is true to an extent. But in terms of his personal life, there are limitations, understandable of course, but it seems to me we only know what we are shown and the rest is left to be read between the lines. 

Louis, I feel as though we learn more about him through his music, his private life is fairly private, other than what he talks about and what we are shown, [side note: not everything that we are shown is necessarily how it is/true, this applies to all 5 boys] Louis is also quite an interesting case, we saw him get progressively quieter as time went on, especially in comparison to how he was in 2010/11, [many fans who believe in Larry attribute this to him being pushed into the closet and having to hide his more ‘flamboyant nature’] or it could be a simple case of all the stress and difficult life events taking its toll, or even [I think it's likely] a combination of all of this. Either way, it has been disheartening to witness.

Zayn has always been the most misunderstood I think. As Zayn himself said, they were all given personas and that has stuck with them from their time in the band, even until this present day I would say, [I wish some would consider this in Liam's case but that's for another post]. If you saw Zayn from 2010/11 he wasn’t particularly ‘mysterious’ or such, in fact, he was quite boisterous and funny if my memory serves me correctly, but again If the management wanted them to have a certain persona they were going to make sure it stuck. Zayn has always kept his private life exactly that, private. Typically in the case of his relationships [I would say this applies to some of Liam's also] but the main times we would hear about Zayn's relationships is if it was to make Zayn out to be a bad guy or to benefit the woman he was dating at the time through PR or some way as such, which is quite telling in itself.

Liam, again, people would think Liam is quite public and we know a lot about him but if you pay close attention, it's not the case at all. We don't know anything other than what we are told by the press or what we see. This is the case for all of them but as we know, from recent videos that Liam has done, there are a lot of other factors at play and a lot of distortion of stories and such that happens that we will never truly understand, we can only look out for it.  [another side note: IMO Liam is the full package he’s got the vocal range, the lyrical range, the melodies the dance moves, the fashion but he got so sabotaged and that pisses me off so much.]  Liam had always been the spokesperson for One Direction whilst in the band. Some people, particularly some groups of ‘fans’ or newer fans think that all his talking about 1D is him ‘trying too hard’ or whatever else to bash him. But the truth is, if you look closer, he never really stopped being the spokesperson for the band. He speaks on all of their solo endeavours, all of their achievements, indulges the nostalgic fans and is the one who most openly shows his support, he still holds the role of the spokesperson, just in a different manner. 

At a point you would seldom hear them talk about their One Direction days, unless you are the spokesperson... [it has become more frequent now], which is understandable as they are now Solo artists and perhaps wanting away from that image, but it is also quite curious in a way. But that is best left for another ramble. However, up until recently, I feel like the boys who have spoken the most about the band have been, in a sense, allocated to speak more on the topic than others [Personally I link this to the Politics comment, I’ll explain a little later on] But I find it interesting as to the different reactions we get from certain groups about each member when they do speak about their time in One Direction. Typically, Harry and Niall are met with positive reactions, with a few exceptions of course. Zayn sits in between, some of it gets regarded with nostalgia, other reactions are positive and hopeful and then the outright negativity too. Louis again sits in the middle. Liam however, you do of course get nostalgia and of course positive reactions from his fans and some OT5 fans. However, this is severely outweighed by the negativity he receives for it from *certain* ‘fans’ and some newer fans and just general people who like to jump on the hate bandwagon [side note: my god I miss 2013/2014 1D Twitter].

I’m not sure how many remember ‘Weed Gate’, how this was in a way at the time ‘damaging’ to the clean image they had and how much shit it was speculated to have caused behind the scenes, involving Zayn and Louis. 

Louis and Zayn take a video doing weed in a car in one of the Peru (where weed isn’t illegal) on tour, there started some articles that make it sound like Zayn was sick or addicted to drugs. I feel like this was also a big player in how things turned out, Zayn took most of the heat from this and from our end it looked like no one did a thing to help. [We don't know what happened BTS]. Particularly interesting from this headline was the reiterating of the ‘squeaky clean image’, not long after this there were articles about 1D not getting along that came out of nowhere, particularly about how Harry was really angry with them and such. Even more interestingly disgustingly, Zayn took on most of the heat from this despite Louis also being in the video. 

Not long after this, Zayn missed some promo interviews and the album release in Orlando because of 'illness’, they get asked on the Today show if it’s actually because of drugs [entirely inappropriate] Liam, [looking pissed] reiterated it was a stomach bug. it would also be poignant to point out that Zayn looked very unwell at the time [I would think this would be regarding the eating disorder he previously mentioned] but many thought and press stated it as being related to drugs. At the time he was also, as he did throughout his time in the band, until this very day in fact, received disgusting prejudice and hate based on his religion and ethnicity. 

To touch lightly on the politics comment: obviously, we won't know the full extent. But if one were to speculate on the matter; we know certain people had been trying to pinch Harry since pretty early on in the band, so it would make sense that some of the comments Zayn made about the contracts make a lot of sense, I feel like it also links well with what Louis said about Harry calling the Hiatus. 

‘Certain people didn’t want to sign contracts,’ This line is so vague, but at the same time, I feel like it could be linked to a number of things. It could have been Harry wanting to leave to go solo. If you believe in Larry and Ziam it could have been a harsher contract regarding keeping them hidden with more shit attached. It could have been regarding the music they make, ridiculous NDA’s or any number of things, the speculation could be endless. However, it further reiterates the point that we can never understand fully what was at play behind the scenes, as much as we would like. But one thing we did see was how the boys went from being seemingly happy, excited and relatively carefree to burdened, exhausted and jaded which is somewhat self-explanatory [fuck 1DHQ]. I was going to add a bit about their images regarding the politics but I believe that is best left for another post.

If you think the boys are free/ ever have been, I’m sorry to burst your bubble but I doubt that has ever been the case, be that within the band or as solo artists. Feel free to check out this post if you require more insight, https://www.tumblr.com/yaz-the-spaz/662781923367747584?source=share. I don't think we could ever understand, nor will we ever know the extent of what the boys were/ have been put through. Hence why they all say they have a special bond because only they understand. I feel as though villainizing any particular member is very harmful, because at the end of the day at the time they were kids doing something so amazing that hadn't really been done on that scale before. What I do find gross is the fact that some refuse to speak up about the unnecessary hate certain groups give to other members [that again is another post entirely]. At the same time, it is important to remember whilst it might seem like other members have more freedom than others, which could be the case, it doesn't mean any of them are entirely free.

I’d say back to my point, but I wasn't particularly trying to make one in this post, this was simply an info/ speculative ramble, you don't have to agree with what has been said. But if you did read through, I’d love to, respectfully, of course, hear your thoughts, and opinions on everything. I will make posts on everything I’ve said requires its own post because I feel as though there is a lot to talk about on a number of topics so they will come in due time. 

At the end of the day, as Zayn [and Liam in the past] said; “You know, we’ve done crazy things with each other and that nobody else in the world will ever understand or have them. Experiences that we've shared.”

But yeah, all in all, it was good to hear Zayn talk about his chickens and describe himself as a chill, funny and loving guy because it's so much more true to him than being painted as mysterious and I love that for him.

[fire-fira]

Oh noooo the horror of comicvine yet again. Is this character actually in the issue, or just a single background panel? Read to find out, lol. I'd absolutely love the fic recs for when Im done facing said horror though, and what's your favorite headcannon? Also happy La'gaan is precious.

Yuuuup. (Thus part of why I'm planning on eventually combing through myself so I can-- hopefully-- give a better thought out list.)

As for the fics:

From The Bones by MsWikit (otherwise known as @insuffera6le6itch here on tumblr) is-- bar none-- one of my favorite deep-dives on La'gaan's history, and extrapolates and builds additions to the subtle details seen of him in the animated series. Forewarning, this one will emotionally punch you in the gut and probably make you want to bundle La'gaan up in a pile of blankets, because the poor kid goes through A LOT.

School Days by MsWikit/insuffera6le6itch. This one gets into La'gaan's early days at the Conservatory of Sorcery and is part of what initially put in my head the idea that it's thanks to Queen Mera that La'gaan was admitted in the first place, and that she's a bit protective when it comes to him. I don't go back to it quite as frequently as From The Bones, but it's definitely left an impact.

Impure by insuffera6le6itch. This one touches on the headcanon that La'gaan was branded and goes into the event itself. Forewarning, it's brutal.

Four Days by insuffera6le6itch. This one touches on the aftermath of La'gaan being branded. Be ready for FEELS.

Week of La'gaan: Free For All by insuffera6le6itch. If you want some fluff of La'gaan's time with insuffera6le6itch's OC Aurelius then you'll probably enjoy this. (I love the man so much that I would say it's a crying shame he's not DC canon, but considering DC's track record I'd be worried what they would do to him.)

Baby La'gaan by insuffera6le6itch. A mini-fic focusing on baby La'gaan and his parents, Kai and Cor'rel (also insuffera6le6itch's OCs). Kai is 10/10 one of the best dads in my opinion.

Lagoon Baby by insuffera6le6itch. More fluff of La'gaan and his parents. Forewarning for some harsh realities of The Bones due to extreme poverty.

Lagoon Baby v. a Crab by insuffera6le6itch. And yet even more fluff of La'gaan and his parents, this time with La'gaan 'hunting' a crab. Forewarning for the lousy shit of poverty and La'gaan being entirely too well acquainted with going hungry at way too early an age.

Lagoon Baby Takes a Nap by insuffera6le6itch. Tiny La'gaan winds up taking a nap in a hole because he's tired and cold and gives his parents a heart attack due to thinking he got snatched by a predator. Yet again, poverty sucks.

Kai's Death by insuffera6le6itch. This one is exactly what the title says, and it is heavy, but it 100% makes sense as part of why La'gaan is so guarded.

Bad Dreams by insuffera6le6itch. This one follows on the heels of Kai's Death and is... really heavy, but wonderfully done.

To say the least, insuffera6le6itch has loads more and I highly recommend looking through her Lagoon Boy tag. And if you want art (and other fun things they've accumulated) I recommend looking through @captainjerkface's blog and their own Lagoon Boy tag. (10/10 captainjerkface's La'gaan art and comics are on point.)

As for my favorite headcanon for La'gaan, I'd have to say it's the fact that when he actually fully relaxes and is comfortable around someone, to the point that he's willing to just drop his walls around a person and play around and goof off, it's a guarantee that he's going to hit that person with a giant flood of puns.

And the boy doesn't just do it in his first language; this is a kid who is canonly implied to have learned English by nosing around on the internet-- when the rest of Atlantis did not have internet access-- and he isn't above throwing puns in his second/third/fourth-whatever language. (His friends are particularly doomed if he decides to slip in multi-lingual puns that play the various languages he knows against each other.)

Additionally, if he does let his walls down enough to throw puns around that freely, then it's safe to assume he cares about that person a lot and might have pretty well adopted them.

[dhruvxmehta]

BASICS:

Name: Dhruv Mehta ( he/him )

Age: 35

Occupation: Scientist at K Labs

Species: Werewolf (omega)

Bio: click here

PERSONALITY:

Positive: Intelligent, Methodical, Ambitious

Negative: Bitter, Impatient, Stubborn

SPARK NOTES:

born and grew up in london to a human and a witch but did not mature into any powers so he remained human. being from a magical family (he's mason's cousin) definitely had its moments of quiet jealousy but he didn't complain much

being human didn't stop his desire to want to discover something, if not within himself then at least with the world around him. this eventually led him down the path to study (and later end up getting PhDs in) genetics and biotechnology

things were pretty normal, he achieved a lot, loved and lost and only in the aftermath of that failed relationship life felt stagnant. had no intention of moving to lunar cove but his parents wanted him to and not knowing what else to do, he agreed despite knowing he couldn't leave

it was late night when dhruv was finishing up work while seo-joon played around, that a sample slipped from his hand which dhruv ended up catching only to realise the needle pierced through his skin, injecting him with werewolf genes. life changed for the both of them since they had to cover-up this accident as a proper discovery. though it was ground breaking news, it now meant dhruv was no longer human

didn't help that it came to light that seo-joon "skipped town" after a party, leaving him to deal with this situation alone. he joined the pack to hopefully have some support but nico's leadership, or lack thereof, rubbed him the wrong way. he knows nico is a good person but time and again seeing nico putting personal relationships above the pack made him question things and his leadership but always withdrew before things got truly heated. he wants to change things up but being the lowest ranking and the fact that he essentially is an experiment and wasn't born/took the bite to be a wolf, he knows it's not wise to properly challenge nico yet. but one day!

grew bitter over everything, tried to look for seo-joon but eventually had to give up and left the town entirely. until the news came of mason's death

he's been in town since july – for the funeral and sorta just been hanging around (skipped the camping stuff bc he was still moving and adjusting)

WANTED CONNECTIONS:

in the name on science: are you a wolf beta? did you give your saliva for science and research purposes roughly a year ago? well! good news, or bad, depending on how you want to view this, dhruv was turned from the sample you gave. (werewolf betas only)

neighbours: he resides permanently in shadow lake now, likely might not have any sugar and such your character can borrow but do come say hi?

pack problems: back when he was in town, he kinda wasn't silent about his dislike for nico's leadership, your character could either agree or disagree it'll be fun to explore (werewolves might work better but any species is fine!)

wait i know you: your character likely would've known him before he left town after wolfing out or even before he turned wolf so could either be positive or negative

mason's cousin: he's been in town properly since the funeral so if your character only knows him as mason's cousin, that's absolutely all good too

i'll add more later, but im open to everything!!