#sorry again i know it was so annoying in like 2014-15 when we were asking for existence checks every day

[l-e-g-i-o-n-losh]

,,

[spike-and-faye]

Hello, I require your infinite wisdom please!! :O So I just finished cowboy bebop and I am so confused like who the fuck was Julia. WHAT was Faye's past. I literally never process tv shows and the bebop was not immune to my stupidity LMAO like... I guess the ending just really confused me, from what I gathered Spike and Vicious were friends? But then they weren't? And Julia dated Vicious but also Spike? And he? Went after Vicious even after Julia had died? I am Confusion. Please help. Thank u...

Oh BABEY I am so glad you asked! :) Be prepared for a long answer and I apologize in advance for how incoherent it will probably be.

ALSO Please note: this show is fucking complicated. I have watched it all the way through several times a year, every single year, for over a decade now, and I am *STILL* finding new shit every time I watch it. It's packed with symbols, motifs, allusions and underlying themes that are just so rich. It is so extraordinarily well-written that it could give a lot of classic literature a run for its money. I'm literally working on an in depth literary/film analysis my husband lovingly calls my Manifesto on the series right now. SO PLEASE don't beat yourself up about not catching everything on the first go round.

HEY BTW for anyone who hasn't finished the show, please know there will be MANY spoilers ahead!

Anyways ~

1.     Spike / Julia / Vicious:

The information we get on Spike's past, including Vicious and Julia, is pretty limited considering how big of an impact they have on the story. We get our first glimpse in Session 1: Asteroid Blues, then again in Session 5: Ballad of Fallen Angels, Sessions 12 + 13: Jupiter Jazz, and Sessions 25 + 26: Real Folk Blues. I recommend reviewing these episodes for you Julia and Vicious fix.

What we know:

Spike and Vicious were both members of an organized crime syndicate called the Red Dragons, which is roughly analogous to the Yakuza or the Mafia. Their positions in the organization are not clear, but there are some images alluding to them being hitmen, and they likely rose up in the ranks as they were close acquaintances of Mao Yenrai, a Capo of the Red Dragon.

Spike and Vicious were close comrades. Spike taught Vicious everything he knew about fighting, and the two had a deep trust in each other. Which Spike fucked up ….

^^Vicious looks hot asf here

Julia was Vicious' lover/girlfriend. One night in 2068 (three years prior to the time we watch in the Bebop) Spike is injured, presumably from a syndicate-related fight and he passes out in front of her door. She takes him in and nurses him back to health and he SIMPS HARD for her. We’re all but told he's in LOVE love with her. They start an affair, and Spike tells her he's ready to abandon the whole life - the syndicate, Vicious, Mao, all of it - and they could run away together.

WELL Vicious finds out about this whole affair, and is DOUBLY betrayed because his literal best friend and girlfriend have been having an affair, and tbh I think he was just as jealous of Spike's attentions as he was of Julia's. (Whether or not it’s a sexual thing for Spike … well … I have my own headcanons about that). SO when he finds out they're going to run away together, he gives Julia an ultimatum: you can either kill him, or I'll just kill you both. Spike had written her a letter about meeting him in the graveyard to start their new life together, which she tears up to hide his location from Vicious. (This is the falling ripped up pieces of paper we see in Spike's flash back in Session 5).

^^ r/gifsyoucanhear

**NOTE: There are those who disagree with this view, (looking at you Cowboy Bebop wiki) instead suggesting Vicious and Spike were buds in the past, but then hated each other once they were both considered as potential successors to Mao. That's why Vicious wanted him dead, and he was enlisting Julia (who he didn't necessarily have a romantic connection to) to help kill Spike since he knew Spike loved her. Personally, I think there is plenty of evidence that Vicious also wanted Julia, and in fact was already with her, when Spike started seeing her. If you want me to cite my sources please send an me an ask about it :)

Spike gets the idea, whether by her just not showing up or word around the syndicate being like YO Vicious wants you dead. Despite Vicious' ultimatum to Julia, he was gunna kill Spike either way. SO he sets up an ambush, and SadBoy™ Spike walks intentionally into their trap. Somehow, he doesn't die, though the entire syndicate thinks he did. (Note Annie's reaction to seeing him alive in Session 5). It’s also implied that this is where he lost his eye.

HIS EYE - possibly the most important symbol in the show so I do have to mention it. In episode 26, he explicitly explains to Faye that one of his eyes only sees the past. (PS this isn't dissimilar to Jet's arm… we can get into that another time). Basically, he's constantly living halfway in the past and halfway in the present, and describes the past like a dream he can never wake up from. Because dysfunctional or not - the syndicate WAS his family. (Again - see his relationship with Annie, Mao, and Vicious (prior to Spike's betrayal)). It's his reminder that Julia didn't run away with him, and that he'd left behind that life for her. (He didn’t know she was being threatened until the final episode). Basically Spike is hyper-fixated on what he had and what could've been.

Not long after this, Spike starts bounty hunting because like? What else is he going to do. He doesn't care if he lives or dies but if he has to be alive, he may as well be able to eat. He joins up with Jet Black on the Bebop.

TL; DR: Spike stole Vicious' lover, Julia, so Vicious made Julia choose between her killing Spike or Vicious killing them both. She instead went into hiding and Spike thought he'd been stood up. He fake died and got the hell outta dodge.

2.     What was Faye's past?

Ok let me start by saying Faye is my wife and my life. HOWEVER I hated her the first time I watched this show circa age 13 because I thought she was annoying/vain/shallow (also because #internalizedmisogyny lol am I right fam). Good news! She is all those things! But she's also very lonely and scared and an amnesiac and secretly a sweetie and she realizes she loves the crew of the Bebop like family.

SO my wife's backstory:

she was born in the 1990s (#only90skidsremember). There's some debate over her race/nationality, but due to the images of her hanging out in Merlion Park in Singapore, my bet is that she's Singaporean. She comes from a wealthy family with a big house, and we see some utterly *adorable* film of her as a child/young adolescent in Session 18: Speak Like a Child. I cry everytime </3

^^ Holla for the representation

In 2014, circa age 20, she and her parents were going into space when the shuttle they were on had some kind of malfunction/accident and it killed an unknown number of people, including her parents. At the time, the technology didn’t exist to be able to save her, so she was put into a cryogenic sleep state. Meanwhile, the Lunar Gate accident occurs, breaking up the moon and causing rock showers on Earth's surface. Most people died, moved to Mars, or settled underground.

She wakes up from her cryogenic sleep in 2068. (Also the year Spike leaves the syndicate.) She's 'woken' by the corrupt Dr. Bacchus who plans on charging her for the years and years of medical debt she's accrued. (See Session 15: My Funny Valentine.) Luckily a lawyer takes interest in her case (Whitney Haggus Matsumoto) and tries to help get rid of her debt. The two fall in love, but turns out Whitney is a Scumbag. He's actually Dr. Bacchus's nephew, and faked his death, writing Faye as the sole inheritor to his will. This means she'll take on all his debts. So baby girl has LOTS of debt at this point.

In the intervening years prior to her joining the Bebop, she gambles, cheats, gains a lot of street smarts, and adopts a very seductive character to get her way. She joins the crew on the Bebop in Session 3: Honky Tonk Women.

TL;DR: Faye is Austin powers

YIKES this is so long I am so sorry. Bitches are obsessed with this show. (I am bitches)

3.     The Ending

Okay I'm going to present this in the way, in my scholarly opinion, would be correct, though there are SO many interpretations other than simply 'Spike died :/".

To understand the plot of the last couple episodes we actually have to go back to Session 5: Mao is instructed* to sign a treaty with a rival syndicate called the White Tigers. (*He's instructed by The Van (Council of identical creepy old men) who are the actual head of the dragon. I think we only see them in Session 26.) Well - Vicious is a Bastard Man and he and his fellow mutineers blow up the White Tiger guys' ship and slit Mao's throat. Before he dies, Mao is like "Gotdamnit if Spike was still here this shit wouldn't have happened." Later in the Cathedral battle, Vicious explains to Spike he killed Mao because Mao 'lost his fangs'. He planned on killing Spike for good her, IMO, so there'd be no rival to take over as Capo for the Dragons.

^^These guys are The Van btw

THEN in Session 25, the Van basically catches Vicious and is like “you killed Mao and now you have to go to Time Out.” The Van also decides to just kill everyone associated with Vicious, just 2 B safe. That's why there's a big ass shootout at the Loser Bar where Jet and Spike are chilling, drinking, (missing Faye and Ed and Ein lol) and Shin (younger brother to Lin, who's helping Vicious overthrow the Dragon) explains all this to Spike. OH and PS JULIA IS ALIVE AND HERE IS HER LOCATION :). (**Notice Spike's reaction at this point is different than his reaction in Jupiter Jazz when he hears there's a Julia on Calisto. Much less excited… hmm…).

SO THEN you know we get some flashbacks of the past as previously explained *and* Julia just happens to run into Faye. She recognizes that Faye is one of Spike's friends from the Bebop (she was keeping tabs on him it seems) and picks her up. Faye doesn't know who Julia is but is like damn bitch I'm a little gay for you. (I mean … that may just be my bi ass projecting, but Faye is REALLY struck with her. Look at how she describes her to Jet, I mean come on.)

 Faye's like, 'we should team up' and Julia says 'no thanks but also tell Spike to meet me at *the place*'. Meanwhile back on the Bebop Spike and Jet are talking and Spike goes on about some dream woman who was his other half. (We assume he means Julia … I have my reasons to doubt this … I have a lot of angry DMs about my opinion here lol but I just do not give a fuck (: I can expand on this in another post or you can refer to the title of my fucking blog haha) Personally, I think Watanabe personally left this specific scene open ended, the same way he does with the ending and various other things.

more like SIMP Spiegel

ANYWAY Faye comes back to the Bebop to tell Spike about Julia, and Jet gets intel from a former cop buddy that there's some shit going down with the Dragons. (Again, the Van is hunting down everyone ever associated with Vicious, including your pal Spike). Bebop is attacked, Faye tells Spike what's up with Julia, and he heads out.

 PAN TO VICIOUS chained up - about to be executed - but what's that!? It's a bird!? It's a pla- no it's just a bird. (With one glowing red eye … hm … reminds me of Spike, also the drug Red Eye. Pls let me know if you have any thoughts on this). Just a bird with a BOMB! Explosion (RIP bird c. 2065 - too soon), Vicious kills the elders, his buddies show up and are ready to go fuck shit up.

this show could not be more of an aesthetic

MMMPhhh okay RAINY CEMETERY. Spike and Julia. She draws a gun, explains why she didn't meet him that day, and then hugs him. Now Spike is not *great* at showing his emotions but he literally just stands there. Maybe it's a stoic expression of how sad he is that he never knew she still cared, when it seemed like she dumped him. Maybe he's finally getting some closure on his past. Maybe the past doesn't mean the same thing it used to. (I'll elaborate later on this).

They go to Annie's to get stocked up on stuff, she lets them know she denied knowing Spike was still alive and hey also the Van was assassinated by Vicious and his guys so. Watch out for that. Then her shop is surrounded by Vicious' guys and she dies :(. Spike and Julia escape to the roof, but she's shot and dies in Spike's arms, and says 'it's all just a dream' :(. (Refer to: Spike living in a dream of the past).

Anyway Jet SAID he wasn't gunna go after Spike but. Jet's parental instincts kick in (oh yeah he was shot in the leg earlier btw) and he goes to Sitting Bull to see if he knows where Spike is. He basically says yeah Spike's about to die somewhere. (I want to do a further analysis on all the Sitting Bull scenes.) Well conveniently Spike returns to the Bebop, eats, tells his story about a tiger-striped cat. (At one point Jet asks if he's going there for her, and Spike is like well she's dead now so whatever). THEN we get to the scene where Faye is like HEY YOU CAN'T GO OFF AND DIE ASSHOLE and he's like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I 've been living in the past so I might as well see if I'm living now. (**This will play heavily into my interpretation of the ending). Faye is pissed, shoots the ceiling and he goes off to the syndicate headquarters to fuck shit up.

He basically John Wicks his way through the building, Shin dies, he and Vicious have the big boss battle and whatnot. He kills Vicious and stumbles back out down the stairs and says "Bang!" and collapses. We pan to the sky and see a star fade away.

Well that explains the plot … now here's what I think happened!!! ALSO may I mention, anon - you picked up on something I feel like a lot of people miss out on. Why *did* Spike go back to kill Vicious if Julia was already dead??

Basically, once it became clear that anyone associated with Vicious was being killed, Spike knew they'd hunt him down, and they weren't beneath Kill-Billing their way to him, (i.e. systematically destroying this companions to get to him). And for all his apparent indifference - he really loves his new found family. Jet is literally like an older brother to him. Ed is a little sister. Ein is well … a very good boy. And Faye? Well the relationship is complicated, and I'm not going to get into the 69,420 reasons I ship them here, but I think it is beyond argument that he really does care for her, even if that just in a filial way. He didn't want the syndicates to kill them for their association to him, or in order to get to him. So he did what he had to do to protect them. *AND NO* I am not saying that he didn't love Julia. But it was clear that his desire was no longer to run away with her. I think he genuinely loved and cared about her, but at some point between Jupiter Jazz Pt 2 and now, he accepted that their time together was over. Now he had a new raison d'etre, which is the Bebop.

I think at this point Spike has 'woken up' to reality (as he implied to Faye in their final conversation in episode 26: "Look at these eyes. One of them is a fake, because I lost it in an accident. Since then, I have been seeing the past in one eye, and the present in the other. I had believed that what I saw was not all of reality...I thought I was watching a dream that I would never awaken from. Before I knew it, the dream was all over." (This is from the sub btw I'm too lazy to look up the dub transcript.) He wasn't going there to die, he's going to find out if he's really alive. This line is fucking cool and everything - but it's implications are multitude. I won't go into them all here but basically : what makes him alive now is that he's free from his past. He's alive because he has this new family and protecting them is all he really wants now. Spike was protecting Jet, Faye, Ed, (and Ein) by going and facing the entire syndicate, knowing that their lives would all be in danger.

SO - did Spike die? Well again - Watanabe has purposely and artfully left this open ended. Well, if we're following the symbolism from Sitting Bull, then yeah, the man is as dead as disco, and wouldn't that be a fitting ending? BUT at the same time, Spike always refers to having 'died' before (meaning when he was ambushed by the syndicate, and they all thought he died, and he pretty much did). Don't forget that in  movie (takes places roughly between episodes 22 + 23, and yes, was made AFTER the series but whatever) he like .. DIES dies. He goes to the afterlife and everything. He wakes up to find he's chilling with Sitting Bull, who's like nah it wasn't your time to die yet. So the fact Sitting Bull confirms Spike will die in the final episode, means yeah, Spike is pretty much dead.

BUT -- okay now hear me out -- could this death in the final episode be a death to his previous life? The person he was in the syndicate? Now that he's extinguished the Red Dragons for good, is it not possible that its merely *that* life which has ended? That's the optimist in me saying that, but if it keeps me from staying up all night crying, I guess it'll have to do. Watanabe definitely wants to leave it up to the viewer, so whatever you think, I feel like there's validity to it.

WELL any anon, sorry for the fucking lecture - and believe me, I could've said MUCH, MUCH more - but I enjoyed this question. I always love talking about this show so please all you fuckers feel free to message me or send an ask about anything any time. I am really slow at replying because #life'sAbitch.

Love you all.

SY,SCB <3

[nightswithkookmin]

Hi I just want to ask something. Do you think Jungkook has been always like/love Jimin the way he is before or just when he started to glow up. I'm just asking this bc you know Jungkook has been always rank Jimin last on looks or said he look different without makeup before. I know he didn't meant harm to Jimin but do you think Jimin has been trying to look good and go on extreme diet to be loved by Jungkook or Jungkook has been always trying to hide his feelings for him but act tough

Huh?...

What an interesting question....

For a moment there I thought I had already discussed this in my blog posts? Chileee.

Now you'd have to specify which period in time you consider a glow up point for Jimin. Do you mean the period of 2014/15 when he was starving himself, passing out on stage and bleeding through his nose to stay anorexic? *Side eyeing you.

To me, Jimin's 'glow up' coincided with their debut in 2013. Those fine abs, sculpted muscles yet soft toned feminized features- sorry Jimin, you weren't fooling no one.

This was also the period I noticed JK showing overt signs of sexual and emotional attraction towards Jimin. Jimin just seemed oblivious to it. And he would begin his own whipped journey around 2015/16 in my opinion.

Personally, I believe JK fell first for Jimin and 'turned' him- turned for lack of a better word. I don't buy into this whole Jimin fell first JK fell harder rhetoric.

But I think JK's interest in Jimin began long before this period. I don't think Jk had fully grasped the concept of his own sexuality much less to have come to terms with it in any time before 2012- before Jimin arrived in Bangtan- ok maybe he had a vague idea of it, but I do believe Jimin was his sexual and romantic awakening.

Jk and Jimin have two very distinct and opposite idol personas. I keep saying this.

Since we don't know them in person, I think it's safe to assume every aspect of them we experience on screen is a persona.

That persona is a facade, a curated wall on which they project bits and pieces of their true self and often put up a performance of this identity for our consumption.

In Jk's persona, he likes to retract and conceal aspects of his true personality and censor himself a lot while JM likes to amplify and exaggerate his true personality and put up a performance of it.

As I've said, it's mainly due to their backgrounds. JK was given a lot of leeway in his upbringing which he feels puts him at a disadvantage because he ends up exposing himself too much. Thus he likes to retract and hold himself back.

Jimin coming from a conservative background with many rules and what not revels in the new found freedom Idol life gives him so often he doesn't hold back as much as JK does. But that doesn't mean that who they really are in real life.

So often you'd hear people say Jimin looks more serious in person than he does on camera while JK is said to be more expressive than he usually is on camera.

But here is the thing, concealing his feelings is not JK's nature it's his choice. And this is very important to note. He chooses not to do certain things on camera while Jimin chooses to do certain things on camera.

So when JK is not showing his feelings for Jimin it's not because he can't show those feelings, it's more like he doesn't want to show those feelings.

Thus when people say he wasn't showing his feelings for Jimin because he was shy I raise my brows- Shy my ass. Lol

Was he acting tough then? Hmmmm. He likes to act tough no two ways about that. I've said he has a good poker face between him and Jimin. If you are not careful you might think he doesn't like Jimin. But trust me, that man is whipped on god.

But I don't think that's what he was doing in those early dynamics.

I think he was hesitant in pursuing Jimin openly at the time because he wasn't sure about Jimin's sexual orientation much less whether or not Jimin reciprocated the feelings he had for him.

And you could tell not knowing these about Jimin terrified JK a lot, hence his hesitation.

But later when he was certain of both he became more confident in the way he expressed himself and his feelings for Jimin.

Prior to this you could see him fishing and testing the waters with Jimin, slowly pushing Jimin's boundaries- a gentle touch here, a lingering stare there.

He would often pay attention to the things Jimin would say but especially about his romantic and sexual preferences. Like when Tae said he felt Jimin liked men and when Jimin was asked about why he liked JK and JK seemed like he wanted to know.

Then he went through that phase where he seemed obsessed with Jimin's reaction to when other guys sexualised him and expressed interest in him. He seemed very attentive to these little details in a way that seemed to me as if he was fishing for confirmation that Jimin actually liked men and liked him- in a nonplatonic manner.

I feel Jimin noticed these things too in JK but was mostly fascinated by it. So often he would go out of his way to express his sexuality, exaggerate it and perform it as if to let JK know he was ok with JK liking him in that kind of way. Often, you'd see him egging JK on to touch him where JK seemed hesitant, reassuring JK- I think y'all know the bit I'm talking about. I feel JM wanted JK to feel comfortable expressing his interest in him- he ain't slick.

I've said Jimin's persona is a performance. I can see how to JK that could be very confusing. Hell, half of the fandom still read Jimin wrong to this day. Is he gay, bi, straight, a woman, a man, bigender- it's a lot of questions. Legitimate questions.

And I think for JK, seeing Jimin behave like the rest of BTS with the skinship towards him was equally confusing. So often he would shy away from it. Jk was going through puberty, everything was heightened for him.

It's also important to consider the possibility that, if JK was LGBTQ plus that he was going to hide it and not come out to his bandmates for as long as he worked with them- because it's none of their business first and foremost but also because it would have affected their attitudes towards him.

I mean look at the fear and panic with which they greet Jikook when Jikook breath anywhere near eachother in public spaces- not to call them out or anything but I don't think if they were straight that they were going to treat them same. I mean Taejin is as wild as Jikook but.... sigh.

So then going on to catch feelings for one of such said band mates who gives off queer vibes, he had better be sure about him before coming out to him and confessing to him lest he risked his career and friendship with him.

If Jimin wasn't LGBTQ plus it would have been cruel of him to act the way he does with JK honestly. For instance Joking about marriage knowing full well the fight LGBTG plus couple have to put up to have this basic human right- of course JK would yeet himself out of that conversation. I'm talking about that Jikook Vlive and all the time JK has squeezed his face disgruntledly when Jimin has asked him to have his kids- like why Jimin!

Jimin I feel because he is Bi whatever doesn't take this gay business seriously at all. If you've ever dated a bisexual you'd know the feeling. He is my bias and I love him but God he frustrates me for Jk honestly.

What annoys me most is I know how deep he is into JK. Like I've never seen a man so in love with another man in my entire queer life! Like shut up whippidy whipped ass we saw your face at Manila. You like that man. You like him.

Let JK put up a front and you'll see this tactless homegirl descending into that space we all hate so much and embarrassing himself left right left clinging on to JK seeking validation and reassurance- like can you be serious in your life for once Park Jimin. 😒

Anywho, I went off on a tangent there. Sorry.

But yes, this is another aspect of their dynamic I feel most people get twisted. Jimin enjoys JK's expressions of interest in him- however way he does it. Jk enjoys it too when Jimin shows him he wants him. Remember magic shop? Show me, I'll show you? And that line JK sang to Jimin that made Jimin nervous on Live with VMin? Yea...

They love each other and they love when the other is showing and expressing their love. Hell, isn't that why they are constantly trying to find creative ways to communicate their love? 5/8, love letters punctuated with sorries? Chileee.

Could Jimin's look be a contributing factor to JK liking him? Let me put it this way. People are attracted to people for a plethora of reasons, physical appearance being one of them.

Looks attract people, emotional connection binds them and make them stay. I have said this time and again JK is attracted to all of Jimin-looks, everything. When asked which part of of Jimin he liked most he put all of Jimin as the answer.

With regards to JM's weight, I think the tears he shed on stage during the performance of I Need You says it all. Jimin was killing himself and it was killing JK. Jimin wasn't doing all that out of self love much less for the love of JK.

He was doing all that because he wanted to be an Idol in every sense of the word. He was killing himself for his career. A career JK was once willing to walk away from and JM advised him to stay.

Jk defies the dictates of his career with the piercings and tattoos and gay pubs- the emphasis is mine. Y'all think he is about to be demanding of his life partner to look like what now? Chileee.

And when JK was starving himself and losing weight who was it that brought him down that ledge? Jimin. If it was a positive thing I thing he would have encouraged him.

Jk allegedly called Jimin his Mochi in that infamous graduation night track video. Did you see his reaction to when James Corden called Jimin Mochi? Baby fat cheeked Jimin was cute not ugly. And even if you think he was, JK still found that attractive. Jimin could be looking like my Aunt Becky and Jk would still fuck him.

Have you seen JK freeze frame to take snapshot photos of Jimin? It's almost always pictures of Jimin looking like the wicked witch of the west. He loves him some park Jimin memes. Loves that man to death.

How many times have he said Jimin looks beautiful without makeup? Remember the Vlive Jimin didn't want to be on camera because he didn't have makeup on? What did JK say?

Jk isn't a shallow person you know. He really isn't. He doesn't strike me as the kind at all. Questions like these presupposes that JK is a vain shallow person who only likes people for their looks. Don't get me wrong, it's a valid question, one that I'm happy to discuss but it also exposes the biases against JK and indirectly, Jimin.

Do you feel JK is shallow? I find a lot of people do and it breaks my heart.

Have you heard any of his songs? His GCFs?

He barely idolizes his subject matter's looks and appearances. You gave me the best of you, so I'll give you the best of me. What I found in you is real. That's doesn't sound shallow to me.

They work in a highly competitive and highly vainglorious environment. I think they know more than anything the dangers of vanity- it's fleeting. They put themselves through so much to appease the vanity matrics, to subject people they love through the same.

I've talked about how because JM comes from a demanding home and work environment that acceptance is one key aspect of his love language. He wants a person who loves him for who he is and accepts him without placing expectations on him.

If JK was this shallow JM wouldn't honestly have found him attractive much less love him to begin with. He wouldn't have found fulfillment and nourishment from JK. He loves JK because JK's values and upbringing makes him the perfect person for him to trust himself fully to.

Besides, for JK to be only attracted to JM because he glowed up, he himself must have been a ten from the onset which he wasn't let's be honest- no shade to him but he wasn't exactly packing now was he?

BTS are pretty but they've all undergone hefty transformations throughout the years, magic foreheads and all. So if you wonder if Jimin's glow up contributes to JK liking him, then you'd have to wonder if Jk glowing up also contributed to Jimin finding him attractive- it's a vicious cycle.

As for JK ranking Jimin last... did he ever rank himself first? No. He ranked Jimin last and himself second to last consistently. If he found Jimin unattractive he certainly found himself as equally unattractive only one step above Jimin.

I honestly think he was just teasing Jimin. He loves teasing Jimin because it's how he flirts with him. It's just the masculine energy in him I guess. V does this too when he flirts with Jimin. He teases him about his pinky, his Mochi cheeks and his glow up- Iland anyone?

Why y'all think JK looked away sharp when JM dropped to the floor?? He recognized what V was doing- don't mind me. I'm trolling. Lol. But deadass.

Jimin teases JK too by acting like he is available most times. It's the feminine energy in him. Girls like to tease their crush by amplifying their sex appeal. What better way to amp up your sex appeal than by having other people show interest in you? Jimin is a tease. Bless him.

Besides, when JK ranked Jimin first in looks he ranked himself last. I hope y'all don't think it's because he has low self esteem?

He ranked himself and Jimin last because he wanted to humble himself and by extension Jimin because he sees himself as Jimin's equal and as such recognizes their place as the youngest within the group. As he has explained, as the youngest, he places everyone else above him.

I honestly don't think Jungkook had always been interested in Jimin. But somewhere along the line while he came to terms with his own sexuality he began developing feelings for Jimin. His glow up had nothing to do with it. In my opinion.

I think Jimin caught him off guard? It's that red string serendipity destiny voodoo working its magic that orchestrating their love. In my opinion.

I don't think either of Jikook went searching for this love thingy either as I keep saying. It wasn't planned, it wasn't foreseen, it just happened to both of them but at a different pace.

I hope this helps?

Signed,

GOLDY

[onewfantaesy]

so keep in mind i wrote this story in 2014 when i was still in high school lmao so it’s definitely not the best. not the worst thing i’ve ever written, and probably better than some stuff just bc it’s actually finished lmao (but i’m gonna upload it as the 4 separate chapters) but don’t expect too much. anyways it’s called:

His Mother’s Son (1/4)

Taemin's never done anything illegal, so why is he sitting in an interrogation room at the police station staring at a one-way mirror? His name is not his name. His brother is not his brother. His parents are not his parents. And his whole life has just been turned upside down.

Taemin’s been an idol for almost a year now. The 15 year old, for his entire almost-year of fame, has never done anything illegal, so he wracks his brain for why he’s sitting in an interrogation room at the police station. His manager said he had something he needed to do by himself, and Taemin thought it was an interview or something. This is definitely not the type of interview he had in mind.

The room was well lit, but the cold metal table and the one way mirror on the far left wall made him unbelievably frightened. He could only hear his rapid heartbeat in his ears and his shaky breaths. This had to be some sort of mistake, he hadn’t done anything wrong.

“Lee Taemin?” The door creaked open loudly, and the female cop entered the room.

“Yes?” Taemin tried to appear calm, but his rapid blinking gave him away. He internally cursed himself when the nervous habit decided to show itself.

“I’m Officer Shin. There are some things I need to discuss with you,” she said, and she smiled kindly at Taemin, but it only made him blink even more.

“What - What did I do?” Taemin’s voice shakes, and the room suddenly feels very cold.

“You didn’t do anything wrong, Taemin, but there are some things you need to know.” 

Officer Shin took two photos out from the yellow manila folder held in her hands. She lays photos of his parents down on the table, and Taemin feels his throat close up when he realizes they’re mug shots. She speaks their names and asks if they are Taemin’s parents.

“Yes, ma’am,” Taemin says. It’s only then he realize she asked if his parents go by those names. “What do you mean, ‘go by’?”

The officer sighs, putting on a sympathetic gaze that Taemin’s multiple years of idol training and experience can tell is genuine.

“Taemin, they’re not your parents, they’re your kidnappers.”

Taemin feels like the walls are closing in on him, and the air isn’t making its way to Taemin’s lungs and he feels like he’s suffocating. Suddenly, Taemin starts laughing, looking over at the one way mirror before looking back at Officer Shin.

“This is a secret camera, right? This is for a show? Ha ha, very funny.” Taemin’s laughter feels forced, and his hands are shaking. He turns back to the one way mirror, “This isn’t funny anymore, hyung! I wanna go back to the dorm!” Taemin hopes his manager is on the other side of the glass.

“Taemin, this is not a joke, this is very real,” Officer Shin tries to calm him down, and Taemin is running his fingers through his hair in distress.

“W-What about my brother? What about Taesun?” Taemin takes in a shaky breath.

“He isn’t your brother. He was kidnapped as well,” she informs him slowly, not wanting to upset the boy any further.

“What do you mean he’s not my brother? He’s Taesun and I’m Taemin! We’re brothers!” Taemin shouts.

“His name is not Taesun, and your name is not Taemin,” she says calmly.

“My name is Taemin! I’m Lee Taemin! My brother is Lee Taesun! I’m the lead dancer of SHINee! I wasn’t kidnapped!” Taemin feels a pressure build up behind his eyes, and he fights back the urge to cry.

“Please, I want to go home,” Taemin begs the officer; he wants to back to the dorm and pretend this never happened.

“We found out because of SHINee, Taemin. Your real parents saw your picture and they knew it was you. Taemin, you are going to go home, but to different parents, and different brothers,” she put her hands on his shoulders, telling him to calm down.

“What about SHINee? And those are my real parents, and he’s my real brother!” Taemin points at the pictures of the table.

“Your parents will decide whether or not you can continue with SHINee, but right now, we need to take you home,” Officer Shin tells him.

“How do you know these people are really my parents, huh? I don’t remember ever being kidnapped!” Taemin’s voice is shaking and he’s scared.

“This is a picture of you now,” she pulls a recent SHINee photo of him out of her folder and places it on the table, “and this is you from before you were kidnapped.”

“How do you know that’s me? That could be anyone!” Taemin tells her, shaking his head.

“The fingerprints we took when you first came in, we matched them to the ones we had on file of Kim Jaehyun. Now, let’s go get your things,” Officer Shin leads him out of the room, and he sees his manager sitting down with his head in his hands.

“Hyung, hyung please tell me this is a secret camera, please!” Taemin feels the tears roll down his cheeks as he begs his manager.

“I’m so sorry, Taemin, I’m so sorry,” he shakes his head, his face full of guilt, “Let’s go get your stuff, okay?”

“No. No! They’re my parents! He’s my brother! This is a mistake!” Taemin sobs as his manager leads him back to the van, Officer Shin following behind them.

Taemin feels numb as he sits in the back of the van. He stares out the window, watching as the cars pass by and the world around him moves in one big blur. This isn’t happening. This is a bad dream; a nightmare.

“Jaehyun. Jaehyun, we’re here.”

Taemin glares at the officer, telling her, “My name is Taemin.” 

His eyes stay narrow, and she only sighs at him.

“Let’s go pack your things.” 

Taemin follows after her only when his manager talks to him, telling him everything is going to be okay.

When they arrive at SHINee’s dorm, Taemin is annoyed that the officer keeps calling him by that other name, and he runs to Jinki the second he sees the older boy standing in the living room.

“Hyung!” Taemin wraps his arms around the leader, and suddenly it once again feels like his whole world is crumbling around him. “Hyung, tell her my name is Taemin! Tell me this is a joke!” Taemin feels the tears start to spill over his eyes again, and he can tell that Jinki is confused by the slow way the older wraps his arms around him.

“What’s going on?” Jinki asks slowly, and soon the other members are gathered around because of the noise.

“Jaehyun, you need to calm down,” officer Shin tells him, but Taemin only shakes his head.

“My name is Taemin!” he nearly shouts at her, and he can tell his members are getting worried.

She sends his manager to pack his things, and the members ask if Taemin is going to prison or something.

“What did you do?” Kibum asks, his eyes wide as he looks at the youngest clinging to the eldest.

“I didn’t do anything!” Taemin sobs. “And neither did my parents!”

“They are not your real parents,” Officer Shin says in that infuriatingly calm voice.

“Yes they are!” Taemin feels like he can’t breathe, and he feels Jinki sitting down with him on the couch and he wants to wake up from this horrible nightmare.

“You’re right, your parents didn’t do anything. Your kidnappers, however, abducted you and another boy thirteen years ago. Kim Jaehyun went missing twelve years ago when he was two years old, and he was finally found when his parents spotted him on an idol poster.” Officer Shin’s patience was growing thin with the boy.

“Then that makes Kim Jaehyun fourteen years old! I’m fifteen, you have the wrong person!” Taemin argued.

“Your kidnappers changed your birthday, now we’re going to take you to your biological parents for you to meet your family. Say goodbye to your friends, because we’re leaving.” 

She motioned to the manager to get the boy and follow her, and was annoyed when instead the manger came over to her and spoke to her in a hushed voice.

“Has it not occurred to you that his entire life just got turned upside down less than two hours ago? Yelling at him like that is not going to help.” 

The man couldn’t stand to see one of the boy’s he protects be treated so poorly.

“I have given him time to accept what is happening. Now, I suggest you put his things in the van and take us back to the police station so another officer and I can take him to his family, who, might I add, have been waiting for their child to return for twelve years.” She narrows her eyes at the man before turning on her heel and walking down to the parking garage.

When they arrived back at the station, Taemin’s things were moved into the back of a cop car, and Taemin was told Officer Shin and Officer An would take him to his family.

“Hyung?” Taemin looks over at his manager, “Hyung, please don’t leave me.”

“I’m sorry, Taemin, but I can’t go.” He hugs the young boy close. “If you need anything at all, you call me, okay?”

Taemin nods, staring at his manager until the station is no longer in sight. He looks out the window his entire trip, the numb feeling in his chest coming back. He pinches his arm, and is depressed when he finds that it does in fact hurt. He was really hoping this was some crazy dream.

“Where’s my brother?” Taemin asks, wondering if Taesun is okay.

“He is with his own family.” Officer Shin sighs, rubbing his head from the headache this case is giving her.

“I wanna talk to him,” Taemin says quietly, hoping they’ll let him call him or something.

“Your family has said you are not allowed any contact,” Shin says in a tight voice, and Taemin narrows his eyes at the back of her head.

“Why not?” Taemin growls, unable to believe that his so called family would not allow him to talk to his own brother.

“Because he is not really your brother, now keep quiet,” Shin snaps, and Taemin goes back to staring out the window.

“He isn’t a prisoner, so I suggest you stop treating him as such,” An tells her, and Taemin smirks at the scolding.

When they pull up in front of a house, and Shin is getting out to remove his bags from the trunk, Taemin doesn’t move; he only continues to stare out the window at the house looming in front of him.

“Please, take me back home,” Taemin chokes out, unable to believe that this is reality.

“You are home,” An says softly, and Taemin looks over at the male officer.

“How can this be home if I don’t even know what street we’re on?” Taemin asks, and the officer sighs.

“Come, we’ll go introduce you to your family.” An holds his hand out, and Taemin puts his shaky one in his, and he’s being pulled out of the car and walking toward the front door.

The door opens revealing a woman who looked almost exactly like Taemin.

[skrebles]

I read on the internet that you can help

My name is Anastasia P (I do not specify the last name, because in my city only my family with this last name. I don't want people to know what kind of family I grew up in and am in, because for me it's a shame) I live in Russia, Vladivostok. I appeal to you for help. My story is described in this letter. Sorry it's too long, I hope it doesn't take up too much of your time. Please read it. Please let me know if you can help me.

I am 33 years old, single, no children. I grew up in a family where my father is an alcoholic. He beat my mother when he was drunk, didn't touch me or my brother, and treated us well, but during a binge he spends all his money on alcohol. When he was 40, he committed suicide. Half a month later, another brother appeared. I have 2 more brothers from the same father and a free brother. The composition of the family is as follows: mother 53 years, I 33 years, brother 30 years, brother 21 years, half-brother 13 years (age specified at the moment). We live in a 2-room apartment (1 bedroom and 1 living room) privatized apartment (own, for 5 owners, i.e. 1/5 parts for each owner). My mother was always cold to us, especially to me. Raised her hand (beat) for any offense and without a reason, when she was in a bad mood. Humiliated. Sometimes my mother treated me and my brothers normally (she treats her younger half-brother much better), but it was not clear what could make her angry. When my brother appeared (now he is 21 years old) I was 11.5 years old, and I understood that I needed to help my mother, I liked to mess with him. This allowed her mother to work part-time, and her grandmother also helped her financially. In 2005, there was one case that finally there was a split with my mother (I'm not ready to write about it). In 2006, my mother started drinking. I met a man from Uzbekistan through my drinking friend. He quickly came to live with us. My brother (21 years old) was almost abandoned, he was then 7 years old. I was working on my little brother. The mother and her roommate were constantly fighting. In 2007, the mother gave birth to a half-brother. I began to drink even more, but at the same time I worked. All lasted until 2013, when my body broke down and I was diagnosed with eczema, put me in the hospital (hospitalized), but I agreed that I would not be in the hospital and will come to the procedure, and I'll be home to do the procedures because I didn't want to bring the work and its Director, because it was new year period and had a lot of work. I told my mother that her roommate would no longer live with us. I was tired of enduring scandals, standing between them when he came at her with a knife, I was ashamed in front of the neighbors. After that, my mother drank for several days. I asked my uncle (my mother's brother) and my brother (30 years old) to talk to her, but I didn't get home in time to start the conversation. When I came home, there was a terrible scandal, I had to call the police. My mother and We were taken to the police, and I filed a report against her. The mother on the next day, December 17, 2013, packed up her half-brother and went to live with her roommate. I left my brother (21 years old), who at that time was almost 15 years old for me. I didn't leave him any money, but a week later I transferred him 1,000 rubles ($33) . My brother received an allowance for the loss of the breadwinner (father), but for several months she did not give him the allowance, but only bought cheap food and when she saw that my brother on his own initiative began to write down how much she bought him food (pasta, rice, etc.), she freaked out and began to give him the allowance. She didn't give any money from herself. I pulled (provided) she took care of her brother's school, his admission to the university, and treated him when he was ill. I agreed with my brother (30 years old) that he would help, if anything, with buying clothes for my brother and paying for an apartment, because my mother did not pay. At that time, my brother (30 years old) he rented an apartment and lived separately. For all the time (almost 4 years), the mother gave her brother (21 years) 1000 rubles ($33) and 10,000 rubles ($142) and then after I told her everything that she does not participate in the life of her son, and at the same time tried to take his documents from school after the 9th grade (middle school), when he wanted to enter the 10th grade (high school), then to enter the military specialty. I did not apply to the guardianship authorities (social service for the protection of children), because I was afraid that my brother would be taken away from me. My mother and her roommate terrorized us several times, her roommate came and broke into the apartment, and I called the police and wrote a statement, but I didn't know where they lived, so the police couldn't do anything.In September 2017, her roommate was deported to her homeland and she returned home. She drinks and makes debauchery periodically, while working.

Brother (30 years old) I also started drinking alcohol somewhere in 2014 +/-, and since 2017 I started drinking alcohol heavily. This year, he goes on a binge for a month and has already terrorized all of us. He was kicked out of the last 2 apartments, periodically comes home and does not give rest. In June of this year, he wanted to bring his ex-wife to live with us, we said no. We have 2 rooms (1 bedroom and 1 living room), in one room my mother and stepbrother, and in the other room I am with my brothers. His ex-wife has a 3-room apartment (2 bedrooms and 1 living room) and she lives with her parents (she is an only child). He brought her to annoy us, he was drunk. I had to call the police, because he threatened violence, and I was afraid that my brother (21 years old) would not stand it and break down and beat his brother and this would put an end to his future career in the military. Then a week later in (throughout the week terrorized me and my mother) alcoholic brother came terrorized us for a couple of hours, left the keys, although asked not to leave and left. After 2 days in the evening, he came with his ex-wife, then his ex-mother-in-law (the mother of his ex-wife) drove up and they began to break into the apartment. His ex-wife and mother-in-law are very greedy for money and they pump them out of their brother, this is already said by 2 familiar brothers. His mother-in-law threatened me that she had connections in the FSB, that there were connections somewhere else, that I would have trouble at work, that my director would have trouble, etc. We called the police again, before that I talked to the district police officer and he sent a police officer on duty to us, but he said that everything was fine. After my alcoholic brother came to my mother at work, made a scandal, threatened to come to me, constantly terrorized, threatened, blackmailed and did not let me sleep, I could not turn off the phone, because then I would not know if he would come home or not, what to expect from him.. I once again asked the district police officer to talk to him, he reluctantly, but called him to himself and talked. He said that he does not provide a threat. The fact is that the alcoholic brother is disabled from birth, he has a skin disease, in 2014 he did not extend the disability and it was removed from him. He works for himself, he has connections, as he says, true or not I do not know what he does I do not know. I don't want to check if his threats are true. A few days after the conversation with the district police officer, he began to come out of the binge. A week later, he went to the doctor, who gave him an injection so that he would not drink alcohol. But my brother started drinking alcohol again a month later. After that, the doctor again gave him an injection and the brother did not last 2 weeks.

My brother, who is 21 years old, is worried about me, and I am afraid for him, because if his mother and brother get him, I am even afraid to think what will happen. I'm afraid he'll beat them if he can't stand it. We already went to lawyers and a realtor in the summer, learned how to sell the apartment in which we live, but everyone says that you need to negotiate with everyone (mother and brother alcoholics) and sell the whole apartment, and if you sell in parts, we will lose in price or not sell at all. My brother and I want to protect ourselves from our mother( who can also be considered an alcoholic) and our brother-an alcoholic, we do not want to become the same and will not do something, because it is impossible to live like this, and we have nowhere to go, this is the only place we have. We are even ready to go to live in a guest house (a small apartment), and so that nothing connects us with our alcoholic relatives, we want to break all ties with them. I have a small income ($250 per month), and my brother is studying at the university, he can not work, because a very tight study schedule and he will stop paying benefits. With such income, we can't buy an apartment or rent it. And we can not pay for a lawyer, so it is also difficult to find a good one who took up our business honestly. Please help us! I can't take it anymore, I can't take it anymore. I can't build a family, because I'm afraid to bring a person into such a family. I'm afraid for myself and my brother, who is the only person close to me, I put a lot of effort into him. I don't want him to become like a mother and an alcoholic brother. We are still normal among these alcoholics. That's just the psyche and nerves are not to hell already. If you can help financially with the purchase of an apartment, I will be very grateful. An apartment in our city costs $67916,5. I don't know who to turn to anymore. I'm ashamed to ask for help. I am ashamed if people I know find out that my relatives are alcoholics and in general about my problem. If you have received my letter, please write a reply. Even if your answer is no.We can no longer live in threats, psychological pressure and drunken scandals

fundly.com/help-me-buy-an-apartment-to-get-away-from-alcoholic-relative 

[mrsrcbinscn]

BDRPWriMo Task #28 - Closet

BDRPWriMo Task #28: Your character’s closet! Or, 15 iconic Franny Robinson outfits 

1-4. Franny’s (four) wedding dresses

Cornelius and Franny’s wedding was heavily influenced by Cambodian wedding traditions. [read here and here, later I’ll post a full HC post about what Khmer traditions they followed and how, and which ones they forwent - like obviously Neil didn’t pay a dowry for Franny] 

A traditional Cambodian wedding is comprised of many ceremonies, music, meals, gifts, and guests lasting for three days and three nights. Cambodians choose the number three because of its relation to “three jewels” of Buddhism: the Buddha, the Sangha, and the Dhamma. So Neil and Franny’s wedding ceremonies lasted three days, only family and close friends were invited to the majority of the ceremonies, with the Actual Wedding and reception happening on day three. 

Neil paid for all of her mother’s surviving (post Khmer Rogue years) siblings and extended family to fly in from Cambodia if they’d remained there, or from the other countries they’d been resettled as refugees to. For some of her siblings and cousins, the lead up to the 2002 wedding was the first time Sophea “Sophie” had seen them since before the fall of Phnom Penh in April 1975. 

They wore traditional Khmer wedding costume for all three days, but Franny changed into a Western style dress shortly after the first dance.

Day 1

Day 2 

Day 3 - The Actual Wedding

Apart from her wedding, she has four aesthetics:

Stage

#vintage

Professional pencil skirts and pantsuits

Dress to DEPRESS

5. Nature Dress

Franny wore this nature scene dress when she accepted her most recent Grammy award.

6. “Who’s This Farmer’s-Wife-Lookin’ Girl?”

... was the first thought Atlanta Jazz Festival 2005 festival goers had when Franny Robinson stepped onstage in a dress and boots straight from her closet.

“I didn’t have things like stylists or sponsored outfits back then,” said Robinson in a 2014 interview. “I’d already made a bit of splash as far as songwriting went; by then I’d had full or partial credit for writing and-or composing twenty-two songs. Mind you, I’d only graduated from NYU with my Bachelors’ in ‘02, and finished my Masters’ in England in ‘04. But as a singer, I had only released an EP and featured on other singers’ tracks. I wasn’t, you know, Franny Robinson yet. The 2005 Atlanta Jazz Festival was the first in a series of test runs.”

When asked why the Atlanta Jazz Festival when she was already living in England at the time, Robinson answered, “Atlanta is my home. The jazz festival was one of my favorite things about growin’ up here, so I wanted to launch my music career here.”

To this day, the outfit remains one of the most iconic Franny Robinson looks. Instagram captions of fans wearing similar outfits often read “channeling my inner Franny Robinson today.”

7. Baby Pink Cherries

In 2009, Franny and her lifelong friend and song-writing partner, bluegrass and folk singer and multi-instrumentalist Daniel Maitland (fc: Martin Sensmeier), formed the duo Dara & Danny. 

From an article:

Robinson and Maitland have known each other since middle school, when Maitland moved to her small town outside of Atlanta from Alaska. They started out as fiercely competitive rivals before Maitland proposed they marry their talents and begin playing music together. It was a match made in music heaven. 

Even when Franny went to NYU and Daniel went to East Tennessee State [the only university with a Bachelor of Arts degree in Bluegrass, Old Time, and Country Music Studies, which he holds], they remained in steady contact and spent their summers at home playing and writing together. The first few years of their music careers were spent breaking into their respective primary fields - jazz music for Franny, bluegrass and folk for Daniel - and coming together to write music and lyrics for each other.

It was again Maitland who proposed they perform together, this time, professionally. 

Dara & Danny, a duo made up of jazz musician and bluegrass musician, flirts with jazz music but is primarily influenced by bluegrass, folk, and indie rock a la Rilo Kiley. 

“Dara & Danny is where I get to explore the music besides jazz that made me. I grew up in rural Georgia, bluegrass, country, folk music, that was all around me. And I loved it. I love all music,” Robinson said. “Like, I love hip-hop. My husband got a crash course in Outkast and the rest of the Atlanta hip-hop legends when we started seeing each other.” 

The pink cherries dress was worn at the 2010 CMAs when Dara & Danny performed. They weren’t nominated for anything that year, but were super jazzed to have been invited to perform.

Dara & Danny, funnily enough, has been Franny’s most commercially successful project. Meaning, tracks have featured in movies, tv, and its what gets the most radio play. Her work in jazz is more highly critically acclaimed, and she is much more prolific with composing jazz music than anything else, but there are more people who first discover her through Dara & Danny that then find out she’s a world class jazz musician than the other way around.

8. Met Gala 2018

You know, the Catholic-themed one. She wore a dress depicting Adam and Eve.

9. National BIcon Franny Robinson

Franny is known for not changing gender pronouns when she sings songs originally performed by men. Prior to her coming out as bisexual in 2017, Franny dodged the questions by simply saying, “That’s how the song was written.”

In 2018 she appeared in a 1940s aesthetic music video for a song by her friend, fellow jazz singer, and out lesbian Lora Lopez. Franny starred as her love interest. There was seduction, there was making out, there was stealing from men. It was so gay. 

The ‘Making Of’ video is hilarious because Lora kept laughing every time she grabbed Franny and kissed her because the first time she grabbed Franny she was like “oh my god I’m sorry, was that too rough?” and without thinking Franny went “you’re good, I like it rough, you can make it real kinky and slap me if you want.” Because that’s the kind of jokes Franny makes. And for like five takes Lora could not stop laughing when she grabbed her and kissed her.

10. Seoul Hanoi’d at Glastonbury 2016

Franny’s second most active music project - apart from her constant solo work - after Dara & Danny is Seoul Hanoi’d, the best pun I have ever made in my life. She is a founding member and co-lead singer of the band. Seoul Hanoi’d is a genre-bending performance group entirely made up of Asian-diaspora singers and musicians whose main careers are in various genres.

[I’ll make a full hc post about Seoul Hanoi’d later, too!]

The name, a pun on ‘so annoyed’ comes from the capital of South Korea and a city in Vietnam. Seoul Hanoi’d currently consists ethnic Korean, Vietnamese, Cambodian, Malaysian, Indonesian, Mongolian, Kazakh, Chinese, Nepalese, and Thai diaspora who rotate out for live shows as their schedules permit. The "core” members are almost all at every performance. Of the core members, Franny is absent the most however, because of her wildly busy schedule. She has a hand in composing almost every original song, arranging most of the covers, writing a huge chunk of their lyrics, and is the common thread between most of the other musicians, so she is considered the leader of the group.

Franny wore this outfit during their set at Glastonbury 2016, their first year performing there.

11. Swynlake Adult Prom 2019

The Gatsby-themed one? That was Franny’s JAM. She killed it with her art deco dress!

12. Postmodern Jukebox

Franny’s been featured in a Postmodern Jukebox video, and wore this green velvet dress.

13. Twinning Pink Ao Dai at a Vietnamese Festival with a Vietnamese Friend

The co-lead singer of Seoul Hanoi’d is a Vietnamese-American named Vanessa Pham. Franny and Vanessa met when they were students at NYU through their involvement with the university’s Asian Student Union. Franny, a jazz studies and musical theater performance double major from Georgia, and Vanessa, an engineering student from Texas, found that they had a lot in common.

They were both the only daughters of war refugees who came to the United States in the 1970s. They were both from the South. Franny even spoke Vietnamese almost as well as Vanessa, as she spent her first four years living with her mother in the home of a Vietnamese couple who’d taken her mother in when she was pregnant with her. In both Franny’s hometown in Georgia and Vanessa’s in Texas, the small Vietnamese and Cambodian diaspora groups were very interconnected, so each other’s culture was almost as familiar to them as their own. 

They both liked to put bacon in their cheesy grits and put hot sauce on their rice when their moms weren’t looking. They both loved authentic Chinese food as much as the next self-respectin’ first-generation gal, but they also could put away some crab rangoons because cream cheese was truly king. They both could absolutely destroy their older brothers in a fight. They both knew all the worlds to every Dolly, Tanya Tucker, and Dixie Chicks song, but also found their parents’ old Khmer or Vietnamese music comforting.

Franny could count on one hand the number of other Cambodian students she’d met in her time at NYU, so even meeting Vietnamese Vanessa who knew how to order in hesitant, broken Khmer at the Cambodian restaurant they found was exciting. More than that, Vanessa was hilarious! And smart! And such a good, loyal friend. She had a hidden talent as a singer and wanted to do music like Franny, but her parents made her go into STEM for ‘job security.’

Vanessa graduated with her engineering degree and went on to get her masters’, but after working as an engineer for four years she quit to pursue music. It was shortly after she took the leap that Franny approached her to form Seoul Hanoi’d. 

On Franny’s Instagram, there’s a picture of her and Vanessa wearing matching pink ao dai at a Vietnamese culture festival earlier in 2019 with the caption, “Thank you for sharing your beautiful voice, laughter, and culture with me for twenty years and counting!”

“What I love the most about Asian cultures is just how many of them there are.” Robinson said in a 2019 interview. “I love when my Desi friends are like ‘hey! be my plus one at this wedding!’ and they invite me to wear their traditional clothing while celebrating with them. I love learning new Vietnamese phrases from my friends. I’m always so honored when I’m invited to participate in my friends’ cultures, because I know when I invite somebody to Cambodian New Year events, or a traditional wedding, its because I trust them to appreciate this important part of me and participate respectfully. Our cultures are so diverse, and beautiful, and vibrant!”

There’s a similar picture of Vanessa and Franny together at a Cambodian New Year celebration, where Vanessa’s wearing traditional Khmer clothing with Franny.

14. Plaid Dress

Franny wore and performed in this dress at the 2011 International Bluegrass Music Awards when Dara & Danny won the New Artist of the Year, and Song of The Year.

15. That Kickass Outfit

Franny wore this outfit when she attended and performed at the 2015 BRIT Awards, and won Best International Female Solo Artist.

[astharoshebarvon]

Ship Game

I was tagged by  @eb-byestelle . Thank you dear !

First of all, why? I can’t just choose ten pairings. I feel as if I am betraying my other favourite pairings. I love them as much as the ones I’ve mentioned. But nothing I can do about it.

Well, here we go.

Shipping and Fandom Ask

Embrace your inner shipper! Answer questions about your favorite ships or fandoms. Reblog to participate and let your ship flag fly!

1.What are your top 10 manga/anime ships of all time?

Top 10 anime/manga:

1. Maria sama ga miteru / Marimite/ Maria watches over us : Shimako and Sei 

2. Inuyasha : Inuyasha and Kagome Higurashi

3. Tsubasa reservoir chronicles : Sakura and Syaoran Li /Clone Sakura and Syaoran

4. Tokyo Babylon, X   : Seishirou and Subaru

5. X : Kamui and Fuuma

6. Cardcaptor sakura / TRC : Yukito and Touya

7. Junjou romantica : Nowaki and Hiroki

8.  JR : Misaki and akihiko

9. Akatsuki no Yona : Yona and Hak

Vampire Knight : Kaname and Yuuki

3.What gif or screenshot most sums up your ship?

Well, I choose yume for this and the above two images represent their relationship pretty well. They are my favourite illustrations and one can actually see the love they both have for each other. It’s like no one else matters. You can actually see the tenderness in their eyes, how much they care for each other.

4. Describe your favorite ship in seven words or less. 

InuKag : they were born for each other.

Sei and Shimako : sensitive couple. Adorable and sweet.

Sakura and Syaoran : love that transcends time and space.

Touya and Yukito : meant to be together in every world.

Seishirou and Subaru : they are meant to fall for each other.

Kamui and fuuma : just admit you love each other.

Akihiko and Misaki : meant to be together.

Nowaki and Hiroki : sometimes second love is true love.

Yona and Hak : always there for each other.

Kaname and Yuuki : eternal lovers.

6.What’s your go-to episode or scene when you need ship feels?

Well, this one is difficult because there are tons of scenes which I love but I’ll do my best. 

Inuyasha and Kagome :

When Naraku reveals who he is for the first time in ep 21. Any episode with Koga, that really shows inuyasha’s jealousy. The movies…god. First and second movie. All scenes I guess.

Sei and Shimako :

Season two episode 6. Though there are scenes in many episodes of season 1 too.

Sakura and Syaoran :

When Yuuko gives them new bodies and real syaoran is born. In the beginning when sakura is planning to tell she loves him but in the end couldn’t. When syaoran fights kamui. When Syaoran is killed by his son and his greatest regret is that he couldn’t hear those words. I guess I should stop. At this rate I am going to end up with an essay.

Touya and Yukito/Yue :

When touya gives his power to yue. I ship yue and touya and yukito and touya. The last scene in original cardcaptor sakura manga where they are together in the kitchen. When touya corners yukito in school, he knows something is up.

Seishirou and Subaru :

Of course the scene in which seishirou dies. Goddammit. I can’ t think about it. Subaru loses his senses [ in Tokyo Babylon] when seishirou’s eye is gouged out. This is getting too painful for me. I’ll stop.

This pairing reduces me to tears. They belong together. They should’ve been together with hokuto and kakyou.

Kamui and Fuuma :

Little fuuma helping little kamui in one of the extras. Well, just read X. The whole thing is unresolved sexual tension between the two. The creators said it themselves they are soulmates, I mean even in TRC one can see there is something going on between them. Subaru and seishirou is blatantly obvious.

Misaki and Akihiko :

When haruhiko kidnaps misaki, when akihiko comes to pick up misaki from his brother’s house, the train scene. There are many scenes especially the ones with Ijuiin Kyou.

Nowaki and Hiroki :

Again, there are many scenes. The library scene. Goddammit. It reduces me to tears every time. When hiroki spies on nowaki, then sends him flowers. Aww. Just remembering them brings a stupid smile to my face.

Yona and Hak :

Episode 24 of the anime, in manga when that festival happened in one of the villages and yona danced in the village garb. There are many scenes throughout the manga.

Kaname and Yuuki :

Well, volume 11 and 12 scenes. Then the scenes after yuuki sees kaname’s past, end of volume 13 and beginning of volume 14, all the scenes in which yuuki says she needs to go to her kaname. When yuuki takes kaname’s blood after being awakened. There are many scenes.

7.What song or songs remind you of your favorite fandom, character or ship?

Hmm, as such no song in particular.

I did read a fanfiction though which had, “I am watching you” for seishirou and Subaru and I couldn’t help but find it hilarious.

And I think, A Thousand Years by Christina Perri suits yume. It’s true after all.

  8. If the creators of your favorite fandom asked you to write the ship canon-confirmation episode, what will you write/how will it happen? 

Hmm. Well, I hope yuuki gets reincarnated somehow and she and kaname live a long happy life together. Maybe kaname is going somewhere and he bumps into a girl, who has long brown hair and when they look at each other he realizes it’s the girl from his memories. And that’s it. After that kaname never sees the butterfly familiar because yuuki is with him now.

X is never gonna end but I always had a feeling that both fuuma and kamui would die. Because fuuma said that only kamui can grant his wish. They both die.

Then they are shown together in another alternate universe.

I always thought fuuma and kamui suffered equally. You cannot weigh their suffering. Fuuma lost everything because kamui made one choice. Their story is too tragic. 

I’ll come back to this question later.

9.Do you prefer to indulge in (consume or create) fanart or fanfic of your favorite ship? 

Sometimes I sketch and I create edits for my favourite series. And I enjoy seeing fanarts and manga colourings. I write fanfictions too. I love reading fanfictions.

10.Smut or fluff? (VERY IMPORTANT QUESTION xD) 

Both. Both. I love both.

11.What ship are you embarrassed to admit you like? 

Not one. They are all great ships. Nothing to be embarrassed about. 

12.What task are you most likely to procrastinate so you can indulge in your ship or fandom? 

I sacrifice my sleep sometimes. That’s about it. 

13.How many hours of the day do you spend reading fanfic or looking at fanart or other media? 

When there is nothing to do, quite a lot of hours. But when exams are there, I see how the preparation is. But I usually spend quite a lot of time on it.

14.How many memorabilia’s do you own of your favorite fandom or ship (clothes, plushies, etc.)? 

Well, I’ve got lots of volumes of each series and artbooks too. And I’ve also got drama CD’s of some series and magazines. 

15.If you could own one authentic item from your favorite fandom world, what would it be? 

Hmm. Not anything in particular.

16.What fandom have you found to be too toxic to deal with?   

Ah. The best question. Well, I haven’t been in inuyasha fandom but I know it’s pretty weird because for some bullshit reason kagome is shipped with sesshoumaru and inuyasha is portrayed as a person who violates her. Yikes.

Now, I have got nothing against shipping characters who aren’t together. I do that a lot but when the same people come onto inuyasha/kagome and sesshoumaru/kikyo fanarts and spout shit, well I get angry then. Because I adore sesshoumaru and kikyo. It doesn’t happen but I still like it and it has the most gorgeous fanarts ever.

If sesskag and rinsess, which is weird no matter how it’s cut, shippers come and say this would’ve been better if it was sesshkag  fanart / fiction, well I get angry then. Sesshoumaru is my favourite character ever and I really don’t like seeing people think he only belongs with sesskag shippers. What the hell?

He is no one’s property. The only character he remotely showed something for was Kagura. And I am not gonna open Sesshoumaru and Rin thing. That is....well. Let’s just leave it.

Clamp fandom. I dunno…I am not particularly in it but I read some comments on some sites and it’s pretty annoying when some people say you must acknowledge kotori and kamui thing.

Sorry, there was no thing.

Kotori was obsessed with kamui. Did she deserve to die. Hell no. But kotori and kamui just doesn’t exist. I mean the creators themselves said : don’t call kamui and fuuma brothers. No. They are soulmates. Fuuma is all what kamui thinks about. Even in colour illustrations which shows the group, Kotori is always seen glomping kamui like some weird obsessed fangirl. It’s disconcerting. Kamui is always shocked or surprised. Well, whatever kamui and fuuma belong together.

And now the most toxic fandom. Vampire knight. I stopped posting in the tags quite a while back because I am just tired.  I’ve had enough.

Zeki shippers : unable to accept yuuki loved kaname way more than she loved zero. It’s blatantly obvious if you read the manga. But the shippers are not only rude but they also get personal and insult the blogger. They mock the other shippers and keep on ranting and raving about abuse and whatever nonsense that was prevalent in the forums between  2010-2014. Now the same thing happens here on tumblr.

Zeki shippers are unable to accept that not everyone worships zero’s character. Honestly, I never hated zero. I was always like, I want kaname and yuuki together, zero can be with someone else. But his fans and shippers are just nasty. I’ve never encountered a single decent member of this ship. They are rude and insulting and love to send anon messages.

18.Do you have or would you consider getting a tattoo depicting your favorite ship or fandom? 

Nope. Not fond of tattoos.

19.What is the strangest thing you’ve done to honor your favorite fandom, ship or character?

Nothing.

[amandayuebing]

My Life is Very Shoujo Manga, Chapter 34: The time someone tried to go for Tony’s sausage 😳

I learned a lot about Tony’s personality by seeing the way he reacts when he’s confronted by someone who tries to bring him down. 

🌭 🌭 🌭 🌭  🌭

During the Summer break of 2014-15, Tony and I were invited to dinner by my friends, Candy, Mal, MJ and Noah. Although... I’m not really sure if Noah knew Tony was invited.

I feel terrible that I haven’t mentioned Noah much in the story so far, when in fact, he was a big part of my life that semester as well. 

The funny thing was, I met Noah the same day that I met Tony. He was the one I got to know first. 

Clubs Day of Spring semester 2014, Mallory and I met up with Candy and Mary-Jo at the tower building of our university. That was when we were introduced by Candy to Noah. 

Noah was a friend from one of the other classes Candy had taken and would be in the same auditing lectures and tutorials as us. He’d also be joining our group for all the group work assignments. We got along really well. 

In hindsight, I feel quite sorry for poor Noah. 

After Mal and I signed up for the trial class at the kendo club, Candy, MJ, Noah, Mal and I decided to have lunch together at Din Tai Fung, opposite the uni. I remember really clicking with Noah early on.

I remember spending a lot of time with Noah, cracking up to his goofy jokes; being able to talk to him about personal things; admitting to him that he was one of the few people I felt safe and understood around because he was one of the few people who believed me and cared about the stalker situation... before we began to unintentionally distance when I became pulled into the kendo “family”. 

Before Tony came along, Noah would walk me home from classes. Honestly, I loved Noah a bunch. 

I just wasn’t in love with him.

I can see, in hindsight, why he had a little resentment towards the kendo club and wasn’t particularly fond of Tony. 

We were so close, then suddenly, Tony became all I could talk about.

It makes so much sense now, why when we grabbed dinner that night at Burger Project why he intentionally or unintentionally treated Tony a little unwelcomely... I remember being so angry at both Noah and Tony’s behaviour that night, except I only told Tony off for his behaviour. 

Although the girls had met Tony I think a total of three times at this point (and only briefly the first two), Tony fit into our group so naturally. I was so happy! 

Isn’t it a fantastic sign when the people you’re closest to get along with your partner? After all, we tend to choose to keep closest to us those who share similar values and interests.

But Tony fit in a little too naturally, I think...

Noah made “friendly” jabs at Tony, and Tony, in a good-spirited way, naturally rolled them back.

Then Noah would make another. The same thing would happen.

Then Noah would try again. 

I wondered if it was possible I could be the only one on the table feeling like these “friendly” digs were actually veiled insults... I thought at the time Tony must have known they were malicious and felt angry with him that he was being competitive and only provoking Noah further. 

I spoke to him about it after the dinner and it turned out, probably to Noah’s great annoyance, Tony’s comebacks were completely innocent. He was apparently completely oblivious to the insults and just thought it was all in good fun; none of them had managed to make so much as a scratch on Tony’s ego.

Apparently, no one else in the table noticed Noah was being a bit of a sausage that night?? I felt annoyed that no one else could sense his jealousy and how unfriendly he was being towards Tony, and how this was going to be a continuing issue.

At one point I am pretty certain Noah made a small dick joke about Tony.

When we’d all finished our burgers, we stayed at the restaurant chatting. Mal and I tried pressuring Tony into setting up a Snapchat account.

“Why are you girls telling me to get Snapchat? Isn’t that just where people send dick pics? No thanks.” he said. 

“No one’s going to send you dick pics Tony!” we laughed. 

“I bet you girls are going to send all the dick pics,” he rolled his eyes. “I just know it. Mal, if I ever get Snapchat, the first thing I’m going to send you is a picture of a kransky... Just a kransky.”

“Why not a cabanossi?” Noah asked.

“Come on, man. It’s too thin. It doesn’t show up as well on camera.”

“I thought cocktail frank would more be your style. You know, small and short.” A hint of meanness came out in Noah’s voice when he said it. 

“Nah,” Tony replied, straight-faced. “It’s all about the Chinese sausage.”

“Pff, Chinese sausages are small and skinny, too, hey? How are you supposed to impress anyone with an Asian sausage?”

“It’s not all about size, bro. This is much more exciting than your typical sausage,” he wagged his eyebrows. “It’s got a bit of spiciness to it... Chicks love that shit.”

Tony winked and made a chef’s kiss. 

The table erupted with laughter. 

Everyone laughed really hard, except one person. 

Although he was laughing, I could feel his anger seeth through and his attempts became more aggressive every time he made a failed attempt to roast Tony.

It didn’t help that Candy especially found Tony’s dirty humour hilarious. 

“Oh my god, I’m dying!” She rubbed a tear out of her eye. 

“No wonder you picked up a dirty-minded girl like Amanda,” she said slapped Tony on the shoulder and winked. “She may look innocent, but oh boy...”

“Candy, stop spreading lies!” I acted fake offended. “What do you mean? I am innocent!”

“Suree, girl... Tony, let me tell you something about Amanda. Don’t believe that innocent face for a second.” 

[godofavengers]

Arrowverse series rewrite

Pilot, part 1: Just a little history

pairings: none currently

word count: 1,271 (sorry its short the rest will be a lot longer)

A/N: Ok so basically this is gonna be the very beginning of my series rewrite of the arrowverse. In the future, it is gonna go a little into legends but that’s ways away yet. this first part is not really the pilot episode of the flash. It’s gonna begin in the flash and there will be some crossovers/written episodes of arrow. it more sets the tone for my character Callie Hall she is a little based on me but more of a badass lol. I hope you enjoy and I can't wait to post more parts of this story in the future.

Do you believe in the impossible? Do you believe that people can run as fast as light, combine from two people into one person, or shoot fire from their bare hands? How about a person creating a storm with their body, maybe even something as little as a criminal stealing a freeze ray or cold gun? I do, and I have the story to prove it. So sit back, relax and find out my story.

October 7, 2014

“Barry, I was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime soon?” I said into the phone.

“Callie, I would love to,” He replied, “I’m sorry I’ve been held up at work, Singh has been making me do more and more work. I think he’s started to hate me more.”

I laughed. “I don’t think he hates you. Maybe he just has a hard spot for people who are always late for work.” I joked, almost mockingly, which resulted in me getting a sarcastically amused laugh from Barry.

“So, anyway, back to what you were saying about hanging out. This Tuesday around seven they’re turning on the particle accelerator and I was wondering if you would like to accompany Iris and me?”

I quietly sighed in annoyance so he wouldn’t hear, before muttering “Yeah sure, I’d love to.” If it came down spending an evening with Barry and Iris or being by myself, I would choose to go with them. Plus, I really wanted to see Barry. It’s not that I hate Iris, she’s actually one of my best friends, I just hate the fact that all he ever seems to do is constantly drool over her like she’s the last piece of cake at his third birthday party. Which makes it hard for me to hang out with the both of them together.  

“Great! Can’t wait to see you Tuesday!”

“Yeah, see you then,” I responded before hanging up.

I sighed to myself, both annoyed and happy at the same time, which is a strange combination. I then realized it was probably time for me to head out (it was 2:00 in the afternoon and I was at a bar I frequented quite often (Saints and Sinners)). Don't tell Barry that I'm not the ‘stand-up gal’ he remembers from when we lived near each other.

I packed my bag, paid for my food (and many, many drinks) and, as I walked out, I saw a guy who frequents here quite often. I think his name is Leonard Snot or something, but I hope that’s not his name because, if it was, he probably got bullied a lot as a kid.

I hoped on my bike, yes, that’s correct, a motorcycle (I know I’m a rebel, don’t tell Barry.) and rode back to my very small apartment. When I arrived I got my mail and grabbed myself a coke from the fridge. I was looking through my mail and saw a letter from the local film editing agency. It was my dream to become a film editor (it’s what I majored in college), but I wasn’t doing a good job finding a job, especially since it’s been almost 6 years since college, and I’m currently working at a Big Belly Burger in town. Nobody even knows because I tell them that I work for a big corporation. What, you’ve never lied to keep your sanity? All my friends are rich business people or super smart scientists, why would they want to be friends with a poor loser-kid like me? I opened the letter and saw that it was a reply from the application I sent in about three months ago. It read:     

Dear Miss Hall,

We are pleased to inform you that we received your application and we would like you to come in for an interview Tuesday around six. We are extremely sorry that you had to wait so long for this reply.

                                                                                                       Sincerely, Bill Harvelle

I about jumped for joy as I read the letter, this was the most exciting thing that has happened to me since I found out Supernatural was being renewed for a tenth season. I grabbed my cell from my pocket and called Iris. “Hey, what’s up?” She asked in a very perky tone.

“I just got a letter from a film agency and they want me to come in on Tuesday for an interview. I just had to tell someone, I’m, like, freaking out!”

“Omg, that’s awesome!” She laughed. “I haven’t heard you this excited since, well, forever.”

I smiled into the phone before noticing that I had received a text. “Hey, I’ll call you back. Oh, wait. Actually, I’ll see you tomorrow. I have to go, I just got a text.”

“Okay,” she chirped. “Does that mean you’re going with Barry and me then?”

“Yeah, he invited me.”

“Okay, we’ll see you then,” she replied before hanging up.

I looked at the text on my phone, it from a number I didn’t recognize, but I knew exactly who it was, which made me hesitant to answer it. Callie, I know you probably don’t wanna talk to me, but by any chance in hell will you meet me at Jitters in 15 minutes?

Obviously not, Sam. I don’t care if you’re in jail or not, but don’t ever come near me or text me again. I filed the restraining order for a reason. I hesitantly replied before adding the new number to the list numbers he tried to contact me on.

1.5 years ago:

I was 28 and sitting alone in Saints and Sinners, enjoying my beer and scrolling through Tumblr, when a guy (Sam Burrows) sat across from me. He was obviously one of those ‘up-to-no-good’ guys that dads tell their kids to stay 50 feet away from at all times. However, I didn't have a dad, so maybe I just didn't know any better. Either way, we started talking and really hit it off, so we decided to go home together and, well you know, have sex.

It was supposed to be a one night stand, but then, the next morning he made me breakfast, which was strange, but romantic, so we started dating. It went great for about the first month until he started being a dick. It eventually got to the point where I broke it off, but he wasn't having it and we got into an argument which ended with him getting a broken arm. I mean, sorry don't slap a girl who knows the Green Arrow (a story for another time, let's just say we're related).

Later that night he showed up and tried to apologize, but I was done and said no. Little did I know, he had drugged my drink in his anger. I woke up the next morning half naked, beaten and bruised in an alley just outside of town, before passing out again and waking up in the hospital, needing 56 stitches, and having to deal with a concussion. Apparently, I had been raped- shocker!

I went home a couple days later and met an officer who had lived down the street from me: Joe West. He helped me find Sam and put him in prison for 2 years. After that, I met his adopted son, Barry, and he and I actually became pretty close friends.

[enchantingkittengaditor]

I Think We May Be Soulmates

A/N: So I wrote this for school and thought it was actually cool so I decided I would post it here and is dedicated to my amazing IRL best friend since it’s her birthday today. So Happy 15th Birthday Maya, the most amazing teen girl out there for never abandoning me even though we haven’t seen each other in over 5 years

We are all born with soulmates. Most of us have marks. Whether it’s timers, strings, the name or tattoos just to name the most common.

A very few, pitied, souls, are born without their soulmark. I am one of those people one of the 0.001% of earth’s population or one of roughly 77,000 people as of 2019. I have no visible soulmark, over the years, I have felt injuries I have had no reason to feel and have felt emotions that don’t belong to me. To tell you the truth; I am bloody fed up of it.

I have lived in 5 countries and felt the stigma around several things that have happened to me, but none stronger than the stigma around not having a soulmark

The one time my ‘mark’ of pain was shown in public, was in math class in year 9 when out of nowhere at 8:50 in the morning my nose started to bleed. I asked to go to the bathroom and my two friends, who weren’t afraid of the social stigma around being friends with me, made sure the head of my year saw the online comments about me.

It has been 2 years since and I am honestly just proud that my friends are still by my side. Mason has still not developed the rest of his mark, so he has started to get shamed for it too but both of us don’t care what people say and Kieran still had 15 years left on her timer so she was in no hurry to impress anyone but herself. Since that time my circle of friends has grown exponentially, to include; Aislin Grace, a nerdy but outgoing archer with a string; Samuel Martin, a gamer who understands I love Marvel who has a timer; Sadie Wilson, a caring girl who doesn’t why anyone would bully me who has a tattoo; and Moana Coles a badass with a big heart of gold, who has a string.

Until April of this year, 2019, I had not felt any emotions of my ‘soulmate’ since 2017 and before that 2014. But on my flight to Heathrow, I had two hours till we landed, I was watching Mean Girls again, when I felt an intense feeling of pride, it was strong enough that it broke, partially, through the walls I have built up over years of bullying and illnesses.

Then 3 days later, when I was in a hospital in Sheffield where my cousin had given birth to her son, I was talking to her husband, her and the nurse about what life is like when you don’t have a mark, as their son had been born with no mark and the nurse’s twin sister had also been born with no mark. When I felt an intense pain in my leg that felt like I had been kicked or hit with a ball.

Naturally, nobody noticed.

It wasn’t until I was in the terminal at Heathrow when it all came flooding in the emotions, the physical injuries, the thoughts. All of it. All I could feel was the excitement, the slight fear, the happiness. Now, I could stand all of it, except the happiness. I haven’t felt this pure and genuine happiness since I was 10 and hanging out with my friends at my 10th birthday party.

All I could hear in my head was the voice of a person with a strong east London accent thinking about how happy and lucky he was and… football. Then all of a sudden there was concern over the bond; most likely, over the emotions I have learned to cope with, the overwhelming sadness, the anxiety, the numbness but mostly the feeling of being dead inside. I looked around for the source of this happiness, making up the excuse of looking for a bathroom.

All I turned up in my search was a family with a boy doing the same and two teen boys around sixteen being carted around by an air stewardess. I offered the boy a small smile and a wave. He had dark auburn hair that was almost brown, a few freckles across his face, chocolate brown eyes and pale skin. I couldn’t see any part of his mark because of his sweatshirt. He waved back and I was dragged away by Zoë to the restaurant she deemed worthy that had a vegan option.

“So. Who caught your eye Elizabeth?” Zoë, my older sister by 2 years 5 months and 13 days, asked.

“Curiosity killed the cat,” I simply state in return.

“And satisfaction brought it back,” My mother responds, looking over her glass of water.

“Just a backpack.”

“Sure,” Zoë simply states, “A backpack that’s walking to the bathroom as we speak.”

“Zoë stop meddling, Elizabeth doesn’t with you and you have a mark,” my mum buds in.

“Just because both of you don’t have marks doesn’t mean I can’t mock Elizabeth for her lack of one,” Zoë retorts.

“I just want to graduate and start at university before I start my career in architecture and live with my friends and cats.”

“Good life plan.”

“It’s good to have a life plan,” mum states looking pointedly at Zoë.

After our lunch, we headed toward the gate stopping for me to pick up a book. When we got there it was nearly time for us to board so I just started reading my book and listening to Hamilton (as I have to be king George in my years production), when I looked up for a brief moment I saw the boy from earlier looking at me and talking to whom I am guessing was an older brother. I couldn’t hear what he was saying because of the Hamilton blasting out of my headphones. But all I could think to myself, over the stress that was being caused by feeling another person’s emotions and hearing some of their thoughts, was that he was kinda cute. This was the first time I had thought anything like this since I was two, so I guess it’s an improvement to my mental health as Jodie, my therapist, would say.

The boy smirked just after I thought he was cute and all I could think about was how I had earlier heard a voice in my head saying the same thing. It couldn’t be, could it? My thoughts were cut off when we were called for boarding. I got up and grabbed my bag with my mum and sister, as did the mystery boy, his siblings (?) and his parents.

“Sugar honey iced tea,” I muttered quietly to myself just quiet enough to not be heard.

‘This was going to be one long flight if I have to sit near mystery boy,’ I thought.

I was, in fact, sitting near the mystery boy. I was sitting directly behind him. So, to drown out the thoughts and emotions, I put on my headphones and started blaring Queen, as I had finished Hamilton earlier, and started reading until I had to watch the safety video.

It was 2 hours later while mum and Zoë were asleep. I was about to finish Bohemian Rhapsody and start watching Captain Marvel when mystery boy turned around in his seat and looked at me for a solid 5 seconds before waving his hand in front of my screen. Trying to get my attention. I stopped the movie and looked up annoyed that the boy was stopping me from finishing my movie so close to the end and in the middle of the Live Aid performance.

“What do you want?” I asked with a slight edge.

“I… I -uh- was wondering… if -uh- you hadasoulmarkoryoucouldfeelsomeoneelsesemotionsandpain?” he asked back

“Slow down and ask me again, because I didn’t catch a word of that,” I say with an encouraging smile, I mean it was a lie I understood him perfectly almost too well for two strangers on a plane and were both under the age of sixteen. I didn’t want to smile either it just happened. I also felt as if I knew this person standing before me, but having tried and finally succeeded at blocking out my past, I let that feeling die.

“I was wondering if you,” he gulped here not knowing whether to go on or stop, “had a soulmark or you could feel someone else’s emotions and pain?”

“Why do you ask? I mean we just met and surely, you don’t believe in soulmates, as you don’t have a mark. Your brothers and parents do, though. So, you’re also wondering why you don’t. This is because nearly everybody believes a lack of a mark to be hereditary, when truly if you read the correct translations of ancient scripts, and not the propaganda society shows, you would know that it just means there is another purpose for you instead of loving someone as a full-time deal. Like Mother Teresa or Gandhi or even Elizabeth the first. The reason I know this is, I can see your wrist and basic psych,” I say all this with a slight brow raise at the end to punctuate my point.

“I want to know because I can see the anti-depressants sticking out of your bag, and I know for a fact I’m not crazy. I also ask because I saw you earlier looking around in a daze of confusion-” east London, his accent is from east London, “-like I was, because you most likely felt my emotions which unlike yours are positive-”

“I want to stop you right there and let you in on a secret, I don’t feel emotions I am detached from them and it makes life a lot easier especially when like me your life has been terrible, from moving all the time to seizures to depression and several other mental illnesses to bullying to not having a mark to feeling someone else’s pain randomly to being the only one out of 30 other students who believes that being a liberal is not a bad thing to wanting to die and not realizing it until your math teacher has you write your 100th birthday speech and all three things in your life you want to do, are in order, not hurt yourself, make women’s rights respected everywhere and not doing something I wouldn’t be able to regret before the end of freaking high school. And I realized all of this less than 6 months ago and you, strange person, are the first living human I have told.”

“I’m sorry I had no idea but I know for a fact now that you don’t have a mark,” he’s being cocky, he thinks he’s figured me out, “And you feel someone else’s pain and out of the 7 billion people on earth there are only seventy-seven thousand people without marks taking away the ones that are too old and too young, as soulmates are always within 3 years of each other, that’s…” how cute he’s attempting to do the math.

“Firstly, I know the rules Secondly,. 2851.85 if you only rely on math but in actual stats is closer to 2137 as our generation is less likely to be born without marks,” I say having done the math a million times.

“Exactly and if you take those who you have the probability of meeting, who are going to be like you, without a mark and can feel someone else you’re left with about?” He’s asking me for the math around soulmates he’s already like my friends.

“Well if one out of every one hundred and twenty-nine as reported last week by the BBC, claim to feel the pain of someone else you get 22.1 but with your other factor and the fact I personally have been to four out of seven continents that leaves 12.63 people with potential and excluding me that’s 11.63.”

“You’re really good at math, but what are the chances one of those eleven people was in Heathrow?”

“Well, every day 2.01 people without a mark pass through Heathrow so the chances are slim to none,” I state simply suddenly unsure of where this is going.

“I think that we may be soulmates,” the boy says with a slight smirk. ‘God why did he have to be cute and why did I have to find him cute!’ Maybe he was right.

“Prove it what emotion and/or physical pain am I feeling right now?”

“Annoyance and your right ankle slightly hurting as it has since early January.”

“Very good but how do I know you’re not a crazy person-” I was cut off by a sudden pain in my back. Since we had been staring at each other whispering, we hadn’t noticed the mystery boy’s brother slap him on the back as he went to the toilet. “Are you OK? Did that hurt you as much as it did me?”

“That proof enough for you?”

“No, but I’m willing to consider it. If you want to talk more seat message me I’m 74 i. But I really want to get back to watching BoRhap. Tata,” Ok so maybe mocking his British accent wasn’t the thing to do. Maybe leaving him to face his brothers questioning wasn’t the thing to do either but that’s what I did.

About 20 minutes later after I had finished my movie and was about to start Captain Marvel I got a message from him asking me if I would give him my email or social media usernames, so naturally I responded, after watching my movie and eating a small packet of dried apricots, with my details and an explanation as to why I only have tumblr and Gmail. He responded that he had instagram but doesn’t post anymore because he felt under pressure from people to be more like his brothers and he doesn’t want people to like him just for his brothers. I asked him what his brothers did but he didn’t tell me and instead talked about Avengers 4 theories for an hour until I told him that I was going to watch ‘RBG’ or ‘Bad times at the el Royal’.

After I finished both, of them, we had breakfast and mum and Zoë had woken up at some point during me watching RBG so I continued to message mystery boy realizing in my psychological breakdown of him I hadn’t asked his name. He must’ve realized at the same time as we both sent and received the message ‘sorry but I forgot to ask your name.’ Therefore, I respond Elizabeth and he said Alexander but call me Alex. I asked him if he had ever received a note, this is a sure tell sign that pops in every solstice saying yeah your soulmate is still alive so here’s something they said over the past 6 months I think you’ll like. It’s a thing that starts happening when you turn ten.

I received my first note when I was ten and it gave me hope, hope that was soon swallowed into the black hole I have to call a heart for biological and societal reasons. I was in Liverpool, I had been feeling a few more things than usual (Maya had noticed too), and we woke up the day that we were going up to Cumbria so I could spend 3 weeks with my grandmother and cousins while Maya spent time with hers. We woke up and next to, each of our heads on our bedside tables sat the green parchment we had been waiting for, you see you receive the note on the solstice after your 10th birthday. We ran downstairs after getting dressed to show her grandparents as we got in the car, after breakfast because her family had a rule of BBC news only at breakfast, when we got in the car with everything we both opened our notes and she read hers first it read ‘My cousin made me look like a smurf, and so I chose this photo to represent how she feels about me,’ I had sworn I heard something similar when I had visited my cousin’s school last summer and I made him look like a smurf but coincidence right. Mine, on the other hand, read ‘Why do you nearly die every time you’re in a movie it always scares me. -AS.’

“So, you have a soulmate that’s great!” Maya had said in excitement.

“Yeah, one I will probably never meet because by the sound of it his brothers famous and so I shall never meet them stranded in the middle of the Caribbean Sea.”

“One day you will because they’ll get their note too and one day you’ll find each other. For now, let’s take photos of us with the dolls and notes.”

“Sure and watch movies the rest of the drive?”

“Obviously.”

My flashback ended as I saw the message ping up and it said ‘yes and by the way do you know what “It’s only a horse for a doll it’s not that scary dude if you want scary look in the mirror or at Dylan. This horse is beautiful and not at all scary, OK? -E.S.” means?’

I respond with ‘yes it means I was a terrible friend and should apologize for scaring him half to death even though he deserved it. I was talking about an American Girl Doll horse for context.’

‘OK, well I’m going to watch a movie so talk to you via email?’

‘Sure you have mine. And I’m going to watch one as well.’

I walked off the plane with a Cheshire cat smile as we were escorted to the room for 3 hours between flights. I have to admit I thought that was all I was going to see or hear from mystery boy, I mean Paddy. But if you must know the reason I was so happy because, although you may not get it, you know when you meet your soulmate and I just did even though I thought I would never get the chance to.

Tags: @hollandroos, @hollandarling

[anything-advice-blog]

Submission - AAD

Since Tumblr seems to be breaking I’ll just submit the whole story. So me and this girl (M) met in third grade, August of 2012. We’ve been inseparable ever since. We’ve been very close and affectionate even for close friends. Some time after that, I’m not sure when, I started to develop feelings for M. I realized and told her in March of 2014. I thought it was just a stupid crush and I pushed it to the back of my mind and focused on boys. I didn’t accept my identity just yet, and I just followed what other girls were doing. Throughout this my feelings for M grew intense. I realized - and told M - last summer that I was in love with her. And that I wasn’t exactly straight. M has Always (platonically) loved and supported me. Early May of this year, I decided to ask M to be my girlfriend. She said yes. We couldn’t tell anyone, though. I suspected for a while that she only said yes so that I wouldn’t get upset, as she knows of my severe depression and anxiety. She denied this claim. We’ve always been affectionate, but actually saying we were dating was thrilling. It was Nice. For a while. We’re both asexual btw. So we’re in Florida together for another day, we’ve been here all week with her family. On Tuesday, while her family was down at the beach, we were cuddling in our room and watching TV. She let me kiss her. I was overjoyed. I thought this meant we were better than ever. Her family came up at that moment and we sat up and apart. They never knew anything. Once they left, she seemed extremely upset. She said she was a terrible person and that I would be mad at her. She told me the truth. She’s never felt romantic feelings for me. She said yes so I wouldn’t be sad. I was completely correct. The last month had been a lie. I cried a lot and was alone for a while. We ended up texting our way through it on Wednesday, but I’m still not sure how I feel. I’m still deeply in love with her, but I feel that our friendship will never be the same, and I don’t know if I can trust her ever again. Please help, if you can. I know it would be best to leave, but I can’t live without M. I tried once and I got sent to a mental hospital because I can’t function properly without her. I don’t know what to do. ~ AAD

Update #1: We haven’t really spoken since this whole thing and I really want to talk it out with her but? I don’t know how? Normally we’re texting and face timing like 24/7 but since this ~incident~ we text each other rarely and I’m just so scared that I’m losing her but I’m still heartbroken over what she did so I don’t know how to feel or what to do

Update #2: sorry for being annoying and everything but it’s all just going so fast okay so turns out M and my other friend (N) were talking over the phone last night and wanted me to join but I was asleep so I have no idea what they were talking about (N knows about everything that’s happened) I know it doesn’t even matter but I get so fucking jealous like even before all of this happened I get so jealous so easily bc m is my everything and i can’t stand when she does anything without me which I know is really unhealthy but when they told me that last night happened (M texted me like 15 minutes ago) I just got so upset literally when I hear stuff like this it makes me want to kms or stab someone (I do have severe depression and anxiety btw) please help I don’t know why I get so jealous I can feel my heart pounding and I’m just not okay and I’m shaking and I want to hurt

Hey love, 

I answered your first submission here already when you sent in as a 3 parter.

Now as for your updates. 

Honestly? I think you should put your big girl panties on and sort out the situation. Is it going to be awkward? Yeah. Is it going to suck a little? Definitely. But you obviously want to reconcile with her and you obviously want to help her. If something small like this keeps you from even anting to talk it out with her, then there’s very little you can do. There’s no pretty way to go about it. You need to be honest with each other and talk about whatever issues you had with each other. Find a time and a private space to talk through what happened. How you can solve it better in the future? Address your concerns and hers as well. 

You’re right, your relationship will never be the same after what happened and that’s fine. You can use this to either strengthen your friendship or as a door opener for other possibilities. Give it time to heal. You were heartbroken and it’s still raw so you’re going to feel a lot of emotions. But don’t expect that it won’t be awkward for the first few months. Don’t expect yourself or her to pretend that nothing happened because it did. Because it happened, you were able to learn more about your own feelings and hers; whether that’s a good or bad thing, I think you still need to figure that out together. 

So talk to her. If you guys want to keep this friendship going, perhaps it would be best to clear up all misunderstandings. Why did she lie? Why did she decide to come clean? because you know, she could’ve pretended and lead you on for as long as she wanted. Instead, she came clean and told you the truth. The truth may have hurt but it was the truth. So talk to each other about these issues. It would also be fine to take a break from each other. it would be okay to not want to be friends with her as well. 

Are you being treated for your depression and anxiety? I think you should take up treatment or continue your treatment through this. Talk to a counsellor or therapist about what you’re going through and use their support and help to get through this. I know that you think you wouldn’t be able to live without M but I promise you you’re a lot stronger than you give yourself credit for. You will survive this heartbreak. You will be hurt for a long time and sometimes it’ll still ache years later, but you will get through this. You have to believe in it and you have to try. Otherwise, you’ll never really know. 

As for your dependency on M, have you tried working on yourself? Finding things that you enjoy with yourself and no one else? Finding something that you like doing without M? Maybe hanging out with friends outside of M. Finding some time to be with yourself or with others who isn’t M may help you learn to be less dependent on M. It’ll allow you both to have a sense of individuality without co-dependency. Whether you stay as friends or proceed on as romantic partners, it would be best to learn this as well. 

I highly recommend you seek professional help for everything that’s happening right now. It’s not only what’s happening with M, but your depression, your anxiety, and you thoughts of self-harm are making it very hard to move on or even begin to processing what’s happening. So please, talk to a professional. Continue or get treatment for your mental health and give all of this some time to work through. It won’t be solved in days or even weeks or months. Trust that it will work out. We may not like the results but if you continue to hope for the best, to understand that everything happens for the better, and keep trying to get better you will one day fall in love again. You’ll find good friends and you’ll eventually learn to be happy. 

It’s okay to not be okay. For the time being, please try to talk to some friends that you trust when you start feeling triggered. Call them up. Go through a few breathing exercises with them. Cry. It’s okay to do that. If you feel that you are a danger to yourself or others, please contact your local emergency service. If you want to do, you can call a hotline or chat with someone live. 

Always by your side,

Kelly

[wearejustvisiting]

HUMANZ review.

Before we begin, now is a good time to talk the politics of the alum. Many of the references to situations may seem outdated or played out, but you have to remember, this album didn't start production until 2014. Some of these songs are seriously YEARS old. So b sure not to judge the album for any recent political messages that you may consider "Outdated" because, technically, they're not.

1: I turned my robot off: Nobody cares, moby...nobody cares.

2: Ascension (Feat. Vince Staples): Good production, though I expect no less from a band like Gorillaz. Uses some unique effects that I haven't heard since Demon days, and Staples' feature is pretty sick. GLAD TO HEAR THAT CHORUS BACK.

3: Stroblite (Feat. Peven Everett): Kinda dull to start off with, sounds kinda like an overproduced track from G Sides. Everett sounds like every other british singer to me, I'm sorry, but it's not super unique. Not saying they're bad, just nothing to write home about. But damn, is that a catchy chorus. Maybe Gorillaz should just do commercials. Damon Albarn doesn't even have to pretend he's in the band at that point

4: Saturn Barz (Feat. Popcaan): Really good sample, strong beat, and I love the keyboard used in the song. But the production is a bit overdone. Autotune CAN be used as a stylistic thing, sure, but that doesn't always mean it sounds good. Popcaan does fine with it, but I would be interested in hearing it without him. And hey, Albarn actually SINGS on this song. CONSISTENTLY. The choir is also good, but I heard them do the same thing on Demon Days.

5: Momentz (Feat. De La Soul): De La Soul is an obvious choice. He's basically IN Gorillaz. The vocal modulation on MOMENTZ is awesome, and got me amped. But the kick drum threw my excitement riiiight off my back. It falls into the 22 DEATHBREAST trap of being too loud and percussive. De La Soul can rap, and i never questioned his ability, so that's obviously not too big of a deal. It's like saying 'hey, that really good mathematician can do MATH!' Other than that really, REALLY fun vocal modulation, it sounds a biit too much like Ke$ha in the first half. But the second half with the chorus reminds me of Dirty Harry. From...you guessed it, Demon Dayz. The final part with the keybard percussion is what the song SHOULD have been.

6: Interlude: The nonconformist Oath: "Ohhhh, you're all claiming to be non-conformists but you're just SHEEP" said every other artist ever.

7: Submission (Feat. Danny Brown & Kelela): This song immediately starts of with a female vocalist (I assume Kelela, correct me if I'm wrong) singing, and reminding me of a little dragon feature. Nice, solid music, as well. THAT CHOIR'S BACK BABY I'M LOVIN IT. This is the first song after Ascension that I can really say is a song from THIS album. It sounds NEW, almost like a different artist. Buuut...Brown ruined it. His voice is obnoxious. Why couldn't you just bring back Vince Staples? Or, I dunno, GET D.R.A.M. TO DO A REAL VERSE (Oh, we'll get to that.)

8: Charger (Feat: Grace Jones): OH MY GOD. DAMON ALBARN SINGS ON THIS SONG AS LIKE...THE MAIN GUY. It's a dirtier track, which I feel matches the earlier aesthetic of Gorillaz. But that's not a bad thing. It doesn't sound like a retread, just a tribute to other, harder songs like White Light or Oh Green World. But, the keyboards do a good job of keeping it fresh, it still sounds NEW. Grace Jones is a good vocalist, though there isn't too much of her on this track.

Interlude: Elevator: Goin Up" ...yep.

9: Andromeda (Feat. D.R.A.M.): YEAH, AS A FREAKING BACKING VOCALIST. GIVE MY BOY D.R.A.M. A REAL VERSE. HE MADE CUTE, DAMON. Anyway, it's a little bass heavy, kinda hurts your ears. One of the few songs I would recommend listening to through laptop speakers. And, to be fair, it's a great song. I actually love it when the bass is brought down and the electronics hit. So play it through laptop speakers, then plug it in after that. And, I do at least HEAR D.R.A.M., so that's something. Good dance track....no, AMAZING dance track. But I feel ripped off, as there was no real D.R.A.M. feature that was worth while. Unlike other songs, it seems to take more from Plastic Beach (which I kiiinda preferred to Demon Dayz anyhow) But it still stands as something from THIS album cycle.

10: Busted and Blue: Starts up with kind of a chillwave/vaporwave feel. Ambient noise and smooth, long, drawn keyboards. Very chilled out vocals from Albarn here. the backing vocals kinda remind me of Redbone or Me and your Mamma from Childish Gambino's"Awaken, My love!" SLIDEWHISTLE WHOOOO

11: Interlude: Talk Radio: um...okay.

12: Carnival (Feat. Anthony Hampton): The intro sucks. But Anthony Hampton is a pretty good voice! Matches with the heavier beat. Sort of trap influenced, almost. Not sure what I would call it. The voices and the layering work superbly, and the strings are great, too. Nice and distorted, but not to the point of being unrecognizable.

14: Let Me Out (Feat. Mavis Staples and Pusha T.): Haven't heard from Pusha T in a while. But I'm a fan of the interrupting keyboard, makes it sound distorted. If only they'd taken it to the next level and messed with the vocal track, but I guess we gotta get what we're given. Catchy percussion, love that snare. Mavis Staples has a fantastic voice, and I'm very glad she's on this record with THAT CHOIR BOOSTER. DAMN. The beat and music are also, again, pretty solid.

15: Interlude: Penthouse: I mean...yeah, I guess.

16: Sex Murder Party (Feat. Jamie Principle & Zebra Katz): The sting of percussion at the beginning is not good. I mean, it sounds fine NOW, but imagine that on a playlist on shuffle, and you have the volume up. Gotta think about everything, man. I feel like I have heard that drumline from somewhere, but I honestly couldn't tell you where. Kind of dull, honestly. Dissonant keyboard and strained vocals don't change a song's quality if all they do is remind you of Micheal Meyers.  Jamie Pirnciple is NOT entertaining to listen to. Maybe in a different setting, his voice would work better, but with this kind of music it just doesn't fit. Zebra Katz, on the other hand...fits quite nicely. His voice and range matches the darker tone of the song. Even if the song is bad, he's fit for it.

17: She's my Collar (Feat. Kali Uchis): The snare hits you like a truck if you aren't expecting it. I don't like the Residents-esque guitar in the back. Shame, because without that, it would be a pretty solid beat. The drawn synth is also annoying, too. Kali Uchis is nothing to write home about, but they aren't terrible. Also,using they/them unless I know the artist's perferred pronouns.

18: Interlude: The Elephant: I mean, whatever, man.

19: Hallelujah Money (Feat. Benjamin Clementine): Now, I love this track. Clementine is an amazing vocalist, who deserves to be more popular than he is. He's one of the best modern singers coming out of Europe, in my opinion. This was the first song released from the new album, and if the rest of the album sounded like this, it would be a perfect ten. The beat is simplistic, but just so that it isn't too overwhelming. The choir is awesome, almost like a full on gospel chorus. The keyboards and synths on this song are also amazing. Favorite track so far on the album.

20: We Got the Power (Feat. Jhenny Beth): DAMN THAT INTRO. HOLY CRAP I THINK I JUST DIED. The vocals are amazing on this track, and the matching keyboards are a perfect match. Beth is an amazing vocalist with a unique voice who can really carry a tune. I wish the percussion was a bit slower, maybe half tempo. It seems a little too fast for this kind of song. Other than that, it's good. And hey, this seems like a good workout song. So, it's not awful. But gooooood, that ending. I hate when songs just STOP. At least Hallelujah Money gave us a build. This just stopped.

21: Interlude: New World: Meh, kinda boring. At least the other interludes were funny.

22: The Apprentice (Feat. Rag'n'Bone Man, Zebra Katz, & RAY BLK): Getting a kind of Homeshake vibe from the beginning of this song. Like the vocals at the beginning as well, but I don't know which artist it was. Their voice is unique enough that I bet I WOULD know, if I listened to them. Loving the chorus. Nice flow to it, and I like that they toned back the music on this one. It's more about the vocalists. The second vocalist (who I ALSO don't know the name of, you can tell I'm so versed in music lol) is pretty good too. Their voice getting the lead on the chorus is also pretty cool, you don't see a lot of bands do that, switching the chorus vocalist. Finally, Zebra Katz. He can rap, and pretty well. He has a nice flow, and keeps track of his words. Also: Laughter was SOOOO Demon Days.

23: Halfway to the Halfway House (Feat. Peven Everett) Peven is back, but first let's talk this intro. A bunch of RADAR sounding noises, followed by an underwater-type synth with a kind of ride in the back? It's not HORRIBLE, but it's not really hooking me. Kinda reminds me of a slowed, chopped, and screwed Doncamatic. Peven Everett has a better pattern on this song, and the chorus is a good match for this song as a smaller group. It sounds pretty good, against the dark and drab music. Not much else to say, honestly. Then the second half hits, and it picks up. More people, louder vocals, it's a really good thing. Sometimes more really is more. I also like how it fades and we get kind of a fan effect. But once again, we have a song that just...stops. Shit.

24: Out of Body (Feat. Kilo Kish, Zebra Katz, & Imani Vonsha): The intro is a woman (or two, depending on who you ask) talking about how there's gonna be some sort of special offering. It's seriously right out of a "top ten audio recordings that'll make you leave your hometown and move to Boise" video. But how's the song? Unique enough to use phones as the main synth. The bass is there, and it's loud, but it's just enough to be a good dance track. Kilo Kish is a good artist, kind of reminds me of Tkay Maidza with her flow, but on other songs where she sings, they sound pretty different. Her voice matches the song pretty well. Zebra Katz comes into the track like Nate Dogg on Shake that. Again, though, good rapper. Then a third vocalist, who I assume is Imani Vonsha comes in. She's a much more new artist, but I hope she becomes more popular. Her voice Really is something. kinda reminds me of Jelly from Tank and the Bangas.

25: Ticker Tape (Feat. Carly Simon &Kali Uchis): A slower track, but the keyboard wants it to be fast. It really doesn't sound good. I understand what they were going for, but it sounds ugly. I'm glad it comes out to a more drawn synth later in the song. Really catchy chorus, too. Good percussion, as well. Kick, snare, kick, snare...sometimes, that's all you need.  Carly Simon has a lower, more lowkey voice, which is perfectly suited for this track. Relaxed, undisturbed, but still enough emotion to keep me from falling asleep. loving the James Blake styled vocal modulation on Albarn, really adds kind of a Bo-en feel to it. Kali Uchis comes in later, when the song picks up, which is really where her voice belongs; more upbeat or quicker songs. But guess what? it just...stops.

26: Circle of Friendz (Feat. Brandon Markell Holmes): A song with an intro of sirens, minor violin chords, and glass bottles smashing against walls? Gotta be good, right? Well, it actually isn't that bad! The choral vocal style pairs well with the string ensemble of the keyboards, and the dissonent backing over the verse matches well. Gorillaz has a history of ending their albums with more lowkey tracks, like Pirate Jet on Plastic Beach. Am I glad the tradition returned? Yes. Because this is easily one of the better songs on the album. Markell Holmes really can carry a tune. And how does it end? With a fade....well, at leat it's something.

PHEW! THAT was a long one. But was it good? Well, kind of. There's parts of the album that I thought were great, but others that were just reeeeally repetitive. Over all, it could have been worse. But it could've been better....but it could've been a LOT worse. 7/10  

[river-bottom-nightmare]

Tag Game

tagged by @woahjaybird and @batshit-birds thank you very very much

1. why did you choose your url? because it sounds dark and deep and mysterious and has nothing at all to do with that traffic law breaking, snow mobile riding, merchandise destroying hooligan of a band

2. any side blogs? too many side blogs. everyone knows @river-bottom-aesthetics, it’s just my aesthetics blog. i run @haha-hawkeye with @/woahjaybird but we’re terrible at updating. thennnnn an rp blog that, once again, i’m terrible at updating. and a spam blog i refuse to tag out of shame. this is my main tho

3. how long have you been on tumblr? i joined tumblr around uhhhhhhhhhh idk 2015 ish? 2014? that’s what, six to seven-ish years. somewhere in there. but i made this blog in 2019.

4. do you have a queue tag? nah, i barely ever use queue, only if i’ve rbed wayyy too many posts in one day and i feel like i should space it out just because. but not often enough to ever even make the distinction.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? my very first baby tumblr blog? pjo. i was suchhh a pjo fangirl oh my god. i made this current one because, after deleting my old account, i missed the spn fandom (which lets you all know i am Certifiably Insane who the fuck misses being part of the spn fandom???) so i made another blog.

6. why did you choose your icon? i’m an aerialist (as you all probably know) and a blog i follow rbed an edit that someone made with the icon and i immediately went whoaaaaaa thats cool. i asked them if they were cool with me using their edit as a pfp, they were like sure, and so here i am! they’re linked in my blog description if you want to check them out.

7. why did you choose your header? ,,,,,,so the header for my mobile theme is something i made back when i was knee-deep in my mcu phase and i just kept it bc i thought it was funny with my new blog. but on desktop, my header is that one full-page opening panel from nightwing 78 bc i thought it was pretty.

8. what’s your post with the most notes? this dumbass supernatural one, unsuprisingly

9. how many mutuals do you have? uhhh mutuals that i like talk to on a regular basis? like 5 or 6. mutuals that i never talk to but we like/rb each other’s posts and generally appreciate each other? like 5 more.

10. how many followers do you have? way too fuckin many lmao

11. how many people are you following? 390. i’m scrolling through my following list and wow i just deadass forgot about half the fandoms i’ve been in

12. have you ever made a shitpost? uhhhh i’ve made a couple memes? a few meme posts? but no acutal shitposting

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? a lot, but not nearly as much as i used to, which counts for something right?

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? yea back on my old blog i got into mild arguments with people about some things about pjo that i didn’t like and the fandom at the time was,,,,,uh. a little protective and i got into little fights about that. but tiny me had no backbone and very little tolerance for discourse before she got upset so those “arguments” stopped real quick, usually with me just ghosting the other person

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? not a fan. i mean yea they teach me about stuff but i see them so often and they’re so irritating. oftentimes they’re not even about anything important, they’re just rb bait. 

16. do you like tag games? i love tag games!! i get so excited whenever people tag me in stuff you have no idea. plus they’re just,,,,fun to do. 

17. do you like asks games? i love ask games. i’m absolutely terrible at answering asks (literally i’m so sorry for that) bc i constantly have to make the answers long and in depth-ish, but with ask games, it’s pretty simple and short answer-like and fun. i adore them, but ik they can get kind of annoying cause you didn’t follow me just to see me rb ask games lol. so i only do them every once in a while, when i happen to check my follower count and see that i passed a number or something.

18. which of your tumblr mutuals do you think is famous? i am not tagging them because i am NOT that brave but uhhh @/damthosefandoms and @/batshit-birds. but the good thing about tumblr is, unless there’s a fandom hierarchy in particular (in which case that fandom is toxic stay away), there really isn’t much clout and famous-ness (i need a better word for that one) on tumblr, which is something i always liked.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? yea @bonkybearjpeg  hey pretty boy guess what i have a crush on you

20. tags @bikoncon @screennamealreadyused @bonkybearjpeg @subtleappreciation @newsical

[chickenooodlehope]

💕 check-in tag 💕

thank you for tagging me, you sweet angels @jinbestboy @rosebowl @blueandtaes @bibillyhillsbaby I had the best time reading your answers <3 i love ramblers, and also am one. please see evidence below:

1. why did you choose your url? LOL because i simp for tae in most situations, but especially when he has hazel contacts in, sue me!!! 

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them? this is a sideblog! my main is shelikesperfume, which is a reference to my favorite brandi carlile/the highwomen song “if she ever leaves me.” the line goes, “that's too much cologne, she likes perfume” LOL -- number one, i DO love perfume, and number two, i just love the image of it, and the fact that it’s the part of the song that makes you realize you’re hearing a sad gay love story (my favorite genre kalksdjk) 

3. how long have you been on tumblr? since.... 2014? not as impressive as some of y’all, but i’ve been around the block! i joined because of my freshman year roommate but i stayed for the vibes ✌🏻

4. do you have a queue tag? yes lol i just started using one because i tend to come on in bursts and i didn’t want to annoy everyone with my millions of posts, all in a row. plus i like being able to queue fun surprise things for the future (perhaps this is a personality trait? it gives me the same burp of serotonin as impulse online shopping). it’s “qing the vibe,” a reference to joon’s part in “outro: wings,” where he goes “Yeah, if you feelin' the vibe!!!!!” 

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? helena @bibillyhillsbaby​ recklessly started sending me bts content on my main and all of a sudden there i was, a girl with a bts blog (yes i am giving u full credit because i know it makes you smug as hell)

6. why did you choose your icon? ummmm bucket hat tae??? he’s literally the cutest thing i have ever seen

7. why did you choose your header? ummmmmmmmmm tiny sleepy hobi???????? also the cutest thing i have ever seen, next question

8. what’s your post with the most notes? LOL i do not make content, sorry bestie. the posts i “make” are from tag games with mutuals and the ones with the most notes are when y’all go feral over something, usually music related, because we are all nerds <3

9. how many mutuals do you have? uh yeah i agree with everyone, am i supposed to know how to calculate this? *meme voice* do i look...? 

10. how many followers do you have? a few! again i do not make content so when people follow me i’m kind of like ???? 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

11. how many people do you follow? way more than a few! 353 right now, but it changes all the time. the only thing i am serious about numbers-wise on here are my likes, because keeping them low is the only way i stay sane/remember to do things. so if i unlike something of yours, it’s not because i hate u!! it’s because i have just reblogged it or done the thing it was there reminding me to do, and also i can’t have more than 40 likes at a time or i Will Explode.

12. have you ever made a shitpost? please define shitpost. is this not tumblr dot com? 

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? so often. if i didn’t have an actual job i would be on here all damn day

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won? NO LOL is this actually a thing? i repeat. i am here for the vibes.

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? i’m gonna agree with pretty much everyone and say it fully depends on context. i do think it’s remarkable that tumblr exists as a place where you can CHOOSE to what degree you engage with the news cycle. i try to reblog things that i think are helpful, but i don’t especially like the phrasing of “you NEED to reblog this” because it’s a little too reminiscent of those awful email chains from back in the day, and my association with those is financial exploitation of old people or folks that don’t understand technology/religious shaming from people you don’t even know that well?? you feel me? 

16. do you like tag games? i love them! it’s like saying hello, here is a part of my heart for u!!

17. do you like ask games? i also love them! these so far have taken me much longer (if you sent me a ♣️ and i haven’t responded yet, ily, i promise i will!), so i don’t do them as often, but i absolutely adore reading people’s responses

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? again....what does this mean

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? y’all, if i were an emoji it would be this little bastard 🥺 because he expresses my full range of emotions. i am in love with every single one of you, fact.

20. tags? yeah umm i agree with em and helena, is this asking me if i like tags or telling me to tag people here? i love tags & if you talk in them i love you (see question 19). also MUAH hello!! tagging some older pals and also some people i’d like to get to know better 🥺💕💕 @fakelovedotmp3 @ccypher3 @yoongisbengaliwife @flowerseokjin @vantehobi @hellojeongkook  @stardustyoongi  @bluengrey  @kithtaehyung @taejinnies @dinamitae @gimbapchefs @tae-bebe 

[tigerheart450]

What’s Your Opinion?

Thank you for reading my reports, essays on serial killers so far. This time to understand other audiences I’m going to write a three part essay to three different audiences. The three I want to write to are the musicians, sports people, and surfer dude.

Does Music Help Us Understand People

On a serious note (see what I did there), I would like to talk a little on serial killers. I know why would we want to discuss this topic, well because if we want to understand the world around us, we must understand the people. Everyone and everything has a certain music to it which you can hear or understand if you aren’t paying attention. 

 We all have a certain music to us, where sometimes it’s playing a major key or in a minor key. It’s just that some people have more light than others and some are just all dark, it all depends on what piece you are playing. When we are first born we all have a perfect, bright music, all the instruments playing their part, everyone in sync but then life comes in and starts changing the music. Serial killers usually have had something that has happened to them to change their music to a very dark and scary song. Usually they have been abused physically and emotionally, some have even been tortured by their mothers. They are compelled or they have a feeling that they eventually can’t control to kill those that they should love (and strangers) because of a fear of rejection, just like how their mothers abandoned them in their early age. “Such fear of rejection may compel a fledgling serial killer to want to eliminate any objects of his affections. He may come to believe that by destroying the person he desires prior to entering into a relationship with them, he can eliminate the frightening possibility of being abandoned, humiliated or otherwise hurt by someone he loves, as he was in childhood.” This being said their music starts to become distorted and falling apart until eventually it becomes the most disturbing and gross music ever, their music starts to feel disconnected.

They have said that serial killers have a missing link in their head which stops them from being able to empathize and feel guilt for what they have done or they are missing a few instruments in their orchestra of the mind. This being said, not everyone who has been through trauma in their childhood becomes a serial killer but those who have become serial killers the trauma did seem to contribute to their need, compulsion to kill. You might ask well what about all the other kids who have gone through abuse and haven’t turned into serial killers or what “if 100 kids grow up in an abusive foster home, and one turns out to be a serial killer – what about the other 99?”  Ultimately you have to come to a conclusion that serial killers choose to act on their compulsion, it’s like an itch that won’t be satisfied until it is scratched. 

Serial killers are bad people who do bad things to people. They are like the music in a horror movie, where when you hear it you know something terrible is about to happen. Please be careful out there in the world, pay attention and listen, stay safe.

Bonn, Scott A. “Understanding What Drives Serial Killers.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 15 September 2019, https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/wicked-deeds/201909/understanding-what-drives-serial-killers

Conray, J Oliver. “What makes a serial killer?” The Guardian, 10 August 2018, https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2018/aug/10/what-makes-a-serial-killer

Goals of Not

How are serial killers like sports you might ask well because they are playing a game they can’t stop and don’t want to stop. This game being killing people and the main player usually being a white male. When your on the field with your team and when you spend that time working with your team they become your brothers or sisters. A bond is formed between players which can’t be broken and you become family. Do you know that feeling of trust and love. That feeling, serial killers don’t have. To understand this a little more I’ll share a few quotes from Ted Bundy "I didn't know what made people want to be friends. I didn't know what made people attractive to one another. I didn't know what underlay social interactions." Usually we as people try to build those relationships while they don’t. "I don't feel guilty for anything. I feel sorry for people who feel guilt." He and others, are psychopaths or as they put it “a callous, exploitive individual with blunted emotions, impulsive inclinations and an inability to feel guilt or remorse.” Actually they say that serial killers have a missing connection in their brains, it’s like in football, where if I were to throw you a pass that has a perfect spiral and is coming straight towards you but before it reaches your hands it falls just a little short, never reaches you. That's what happens in its brain. 

The disconnection in the brain seems to be between the amygdala and the ventromedial prefrontal cortex (vmPFC). I know super confusing, don’t worry I looked it up so you don’t have to. The amygdala is involved in the experiencing of emotion, survival instincts, and memory, it’s also responsible for making responses to avoid things that make you unhappy, worry, etc.  While the ventromedial prefrontal cortex is responsible for processing risk and fear. These two parts of the brain, which any normal human being would have to help avoid things that could harm them, yet serial killers don’t feel that fear, they are fearless. Would definitely not want someone like that on my team, a narcissistic jerk who believe that there is only I in team. Have you ever had someone like that? Who believes and acts like their are the best and is mean to everyone else. Those people are so annoying. 

What scares the crap out of me though is to realize  that there are these kind of people out there (sadistic and narcissistic), which are sometimes closer than you think, that kill without regret without fear of the consequences. What’s even scarier is that it could be a family member, friend, neighbor, or even a coworker and you wouldn’t even know it. That they have learned how to appear like a regular human being during the day but then be this monster at night. Like how I said in the beginning serial killers are usually white males who like to hunt their prey (usually young women). They do it for the thrill of the hunt and they take trophies from their prey, like how you would take antlers after killing a deer. I hope none of us ever meet a serial killer.

Brogaard, Berit. “The Making of a Serial Killer.” Psychology Today, Sussex Publishers, 7 December 2012

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-superhuman-mind/201212/the-making-serial-killer

Harrison, Marissa A., et al. “Sex Differences in Serial Killers.” Evolutionary Behavioral Sciences, vol. 13, no. 4, Oct. 2019, pp 295-310. EBSCOhost, doi: 10. 1037/ebs0000157.

Surf The Ocean of Darkness

Dude you won’t believe what I just found out, sharks are just like serial killers. I know it’s totally kook bro. These researchers or whatever said that “ sharks do not attack their prey at random, but stalk specific victims, lurking out of sight. The sharks hang back and observe from a not-too-close, not-too-far base, and hunt strategically. They prefer prey animals that are young and alone, then typically strike from below, and try to attack when no competing sharks are in their territory. Older sharks are stealthier and more successful than younger sharks, indicating that these oceanic predators, like their human counterparts, learn from experience and improve their hunting technique over time.” Apparently they are just super dangerous and attack without warning. Do you even know what a serial killer is? It this person or persons who killed three or more people over time, where they kill then cool off and then kill again, they are totally gnarly bro. These people are just crazy brah, can you believe that they just do it for the thrill of the hunt because they get bored easily, they just need to chill and calm down. If they are so bored they should just get amped about these waves and come to the beach. It’s way better than going out killin people. 

You know how the ocean gives us things such as shells and shark teeth, among other things? Yea well serial killers also pick up things like that except from them, they pick things up from their victims and I guess they call them souvenirs or trophies. These trophies can range from jewelry, clothing to the organs of a person or other body parts. Serial killers are so sick in the head that they sometimes drink their victims blood or eat parts of their body. The scary thing is that unlike sharks which when you see the fin you know what it is but a serial killer can seem just like you or I, a normal human being. He’s usually a white male in his 20s to 40s, a loner and to everyone else he seems intelligent and charming. Dude do you know anyone like that? I can’t think of anyone. That’s funny dude, just then I sounded like a news reporter.

“Not all psychopaths are serial killers, but all serial killers are psychopaths.” I found this quote and thought it was interesting. Did you know that apparently psychopaths and psychotics are different? Psychopaths know exactly what they are doing they are “... driven, focused, and can have little remorse in their quest for success—but they don’t kill (usually).” While psychotics have lost touch with reality. They are all just crazy up in the noggin. In court they can’t us psychopathy as an insanity plea because they are using their will (consciously choosing) to kill others. They are definitely not gnarly dude but plain crazy, not going to hang with them in the water later. Brah did you want to go surfing later? Sweet.

Miller, Laurence. “Serial Killers: I. Subtypes, Patterns, and Motives.” Aggression and Violent Behavior, vol. 19, no. 1, Jan. 2014, pp. 1–11. EBSCOhost, doi:10.1016/j.avb.2013.11.002

Nixon, Eli. “10 Chilling Glimpses Into The Minds And Lives Of Serial Killers.” List Verse, 30 August 2019, https://listverse.com/2015/07/23/10-chilling-glimpses-into-the-minds-and-lives-of-serial-killers/

[courage-a-word-of-justice]

Sacred Beasts 2 | Astra 2 - 3 | Given 1 - 2 | DanMachi II 1 | Demon Slayer 15 - 16 | Dr Stone 2 | Fruits Basket 14 | Cop Craft 2 - 3

Rolling out the tags soon.

Sacred Beasts 2

“Sissy” always pissed me off as a nickname for your sister. It’s clearly meant as a term of endearment in some cases, but it also is the equivalent of “wuss”, y’know???

I’ve seen mushroom soup out of a tin…that don’t look like mushroom soup in that case.

Uh, random question…she has th same surname as Will, but is Schaal herself adopted???

Y’should’ve followed Hank, Nancy…(is her name Nancy or Schaal? Schaal is her middle name, yet she seems more commonly referred to as Schaal…hmm.)

*sees synopsis* - No one mentioned Nancy’s hometown was called Livletwood Village…

I pause my shows a lot to get down these notes…then Crunchyroll or my internet (or both!) cursed me with regular buffering (that can sometimes play video and subs through it, but generally sets down a few seconds after unpausing and lasts for a minute) and made it a pain in the butt to make these notes. But you do realise I basically have notes for almost every show I’ve ever watched under this system? These notes are special to me, which is why I put up with the buffering. It also means impactful scenes lose their impact, meaning well-paced shows get favoured in my picking process on CR these days.

Astra 2

Yup, the 2nd time we talk about how to scavenge for food this season – gotta remember this…in case I ever get into a situation like that. You never know! (creates “The More You Know” star with hands)

I-awwwwwww…I never thought I’d see the day where the Luca Javelin would get animated, much less Astra as a series. Dang, is this a dream???

Eyyyyy. Nothing like endangering your little sister to really understand why you love her…much less understand that you love her in the first place. (partially sarcastic)

Given 1

This is my second rodeo with BL anime (I’ve only read one BL manga and it was pretty darn mediocre, but the one BL game I tried was okay)…hopefully it’s good.

Was there the ticking of a clock in the background???

…and cut to OP. Yay! I can predict when the OP happens now…(It only took me years of training…okay, I’m kidding.)

I think this OP is like a music video…and I think that’s the point.

Kaji??? Is this Eva (LOL)?

I’m no band person – I was merely a solo pianist in my time with music, although notably I did have to sing for one of the musical pieces – but “Thom Yorke” and “Keith Richards” sound familiar. Why???...Okay, so it seems Thom Yorke is part of Radiohead and Keith Richards is part of the Rolling Stones. I’m familiar with those bands by name, at least.

Lemme guess…this guy (Ritsuka) sucks at improv.

I had to go back and find out what Yayoi said a few lines ago…and  love her already because she’s like “You suck”…she’s just like me, to be honest.

Early husbando predictions say Haruki is my dude of the season.

Seeing manly dudes act like blushing schoolgirls is great…!

Yushiro-who???...Okay, Yushiro Ishihara is apparently that’s a singer that’s already passed away, but has a bit of a rep behind him.

Is it just me, or is Ritsuka basically a lesser Bakugo…?

Come to think of it, it would be hard for me to teach someone piano now that I haven’t properly played since the end of 2014…almost 5 years. Geesh, that’s a long time.

Welp, that was…actually pretty good. The only thing that sucks is that this ED isn’t rock, to go with the rest of the show.

DanMachi II 1

Another counterintuitive name for a sequel anime season…this is my last premiere before I wrap them up, or at least until Machikado Mazoku (or whatever) land on CR.

…and of course, it’s back to Big Boobies (aka Hestia). She’s probably the worst part of the show for me.

Why does Bell need an advisor anyway…? I never thought about it when watching s1.

Who’s this Naza-sama, anyway…?...Okay, it seems she’s a doctor from the Miach Familia. I don’t remember her from s1, really.

I’ve forgotten who Asfi is as well…Oh yeah, that blue-haired woman from the Hermes Famlia. Hermes seems like a bit of a loose cannon – the sort who wouldn’t have a Familia if given the chance – though.

I think we saw Freya in s1…just scheming behind the scenes…

Hermes looks like a sleazebag half the time he’s on screen…

I forgot how much I loved Miach’s character design in s1...and to a lesser extent, Takemikazuchi.

Demon Slayer 15

…Zenitsu is annoying again.

I didn’t think Tanjiro was scared of anything…excpt maybe losing Nezuko again.

Oh! I just realised Natagumo has a hint in its name…The “gumo” can be read “kumo”…as in cloud or spider, but it’s given with the kanji for spider so it can only be a spider-related problem on Mt Natagumo.

I’d hate to have Smellovision on this show…(What’s Smellovision, you ask??? Here, read up on it…at least, I was thinking of the Google variant, so read up on the Google version.)

Ukogi appears to be a type of plant known as eleutherococcus and ukogi rice is rice with ukogi leaves.

Dr Stone 2

Episode 3’s title is like “Weapons…of SCIENCE! *cue Bill Nye the Science Guy theme song*”

Ooh, nice angle! (on Senku and petrified!Yuzuriha being protected by Taiju…and not just because Yuzuriha’s butt is showing…)

“You can eat lion?” – No duh, Taiju!

“I want to give thanks to the circle of life…” – Sorry, but can I interrupt with a meme here? *cue ululations that ae meant to imitate the iconic song from The Lion King, y’know, the one that goes “Ahhhhhhh zee bun yah… (etc.)”*

Tsukasa’s frickin’ tall, man! Look at him tower over Taiju and Senku…

Having read the manga before, I just realised Tsukasa is mighty suspicious when he says Senku could be able to rebuild civilisation from scratch. That was harder to recognise in manga format though, I think.

I also didn’t realise, but the shell tale is talking about Tsukasa! Hmm…interesting.

Dr Stone’s ED…never in my life did I think it was going to be a rap song. Unless, of course, it’s a science rap…(There’s hydrogen and helium and lithium, berrylium…uh, I don’t remember the words after that…)

Oh, that next-ep font takes me back…it reminds me of the 90s, where terrible WordArt font like that was everywhere and I had to get by on Lucida Calligraphy.

Fruits Basket 14

Oh, crab meat…these CGI cars look absolutely terrible…

Pay attention to the relationship between Kyo and Kyoko…you people who don’t know about manga!Furuba are in for a real revelation on that front.

Wow, the effects on the flowers are really pretty for the ED…

Cop Craft 2

That OP is just so good…*swoon*

Well…they spelt “Unknown” wrong…on Kei’s phone.

Hmm…I think the insert song was in English.

Astra 3

Oh…something didn’t make sense. It turns out the word the subber is using is “attitude” when it should actually be altitude…

Given 2

Ooh, Haruki does coffee in the OP! I didn’t notice that, since I had to skip it…there’s some kinda suckish buffering on CR, which is why I have to skip as much as I can.

Welp, I’m a pianist. I’m as clueless as any other non-guitar player when it comes to guitars, so I don’t mind the lesson but also don’t need it.

Given this is a BL/yaoi (no pun intended), I think Akihiko and Haruki should pair up…but maybe I’m just going nuts with the shipper glasses here.

“You’re going to have to do something about that soon.”

Aye…I relate, Mafuyu. When you’re younger, you can beg your parents for money, but equipment, books etc. really costs some hard cash. I remember having to go to Hong Kong to find a pearl pink metronome on the cheap…the poor thing isn’t getting much use now. (But still, I think the more I watch and see Haruki in action, the more I like him. Not necessarily as a husbando, but more in the sense of that one cool dude you gravitate towards.)

It randomly cut to Salon Harusame…don’t tell me this is how Haruki gets his money???

I think the comment that said “lolol” actually had 超 in front of it, so that would be “super lololol” or, in my personal way of saying it, “major lololol”.

Oh, so that’s what was in the OP!

I swear Uesama (LOL) should just get a job as a guitar tutor to little kids…well, that would work if he were in college/uni, maybe.

Hey, a girl! Didn’t expect one in a BL work…(LOL, my standards are so low for BL/yaoi, eh?)

Hmm…I get the feeling amateurs get their hands on acoustic models instead. I know a guitar player, y’know (although again, that doesn’t mean I know the first thing about playing a guitar).

I love how the show turned green all of a sudden. The colours match the mood, basically.

Demon Slayer 16  

This episode’s titlecard only has a wave pattern…I probably know what the pattern is called, but I’ve…probably forgotten that name.

Hey, a Demon Slayer girl! (My standards seem to have been lowered in regards to seeing gals in leading or even supporting roles…It’s more acceptable for Demon Slayer, given its historical setting, but still, how sad it is to not see many girls…)

(TW: abuse) Why…for some reason, this feels like an abusive household, specifically where the father does evil things to the mother…but this time, the son’s part of the problem.

I find it funny Zenitsu just calls Inosuke “Wild Boar”. To be fair though, I don’t think Inosuke introduced himself to Zenitsu, way back when they were meant to.

This scene where Zenitsu is crying and has his back turned to the “camera”…they clearly used a CGI model for him.

It’s a BODY! Holy s(BLEEP)!

“Chu-Chu chuuuuun!” Oh my glob, Ukogi is so adorable~!

Hey…where was Ukogi hiding before he chose to come out again?

Another CGI model when Zenitsu walks away from the camera. It’s so dark, nobody can see Ukogi…I don’t think he has a CGI model and that’s good.

I had a weird thought, but…I think Tanjiro would be a good breakdancer, if he were living in 2019.

Inosuke, you did it! But I wonder if those stats are correct and Inosuke’s going to call his name properly at climactic moments…?

Cop Craft 3

Brother Kenny…you’re just lewd.

“…O or V or A.” – Aside from OVAs, hmm…O would be (CENSORED), V I don’t know about and A…I don’t know either, but I guess it’s (CENSORED).

Kei Manoba (sic).

Doreany seems to be humanity…Did they already introduce that? I forget.

This show looks pretty bad, but the story makes the stay worth it.