#straight women

[tumbler-polls]

Anonymous prompt: I'd like to know what cishet people who hang out here think about the lgbt community. Could you make a poll about that? Thanks <3

Feel free to explain your standpoint in the comments/reblogs (be civil!). Please avoid reading the comments if this topic may cause you emotional distress.

[cowboyjen68]

Well Jen, it's happened. I fell in head over heels with my straight best friend. This sucks! I feel like as a closeted lesbian I can't gage the distance other girls want with me... I want my friends to touch me, to hug me, but I can't let them because I feel like if they do, then I *am* that bad, cuz I do actually sometimes want it in a less than innocent way, like with my friend. I want to be her friend in an honest and kind way, but I feel bad about having what are essenrially ulterior motives :( she's so bright and funny and smart but I know it won't happen!! How do you navigate space/friendships with straight women, especially when/if you've had crushes on them?

My best friend in high school is straight and we had a very close friendship from 4th grade on. We showered together, slept in the same bed etc but I never had any feelings towards her except friendship. When we were older we talked about my sexuality after I came out to her and she was not at all surprised I am a lesbian. She told me she knew I didn't like boys even if she didn't have a context for me being a homosexual.

I honestly had no more curiousity about her body than I think the average girl does with other girls as they figure out their body and how they fit in with others. She admitted she had fleeting moments wondering if I thought of her "that way" but trusted me and knew I cared about her as a friend and I would not push her boundaries, ever.

This is slightly different for you because you do have feelings. I am going to guess you are fairly young. High school maybe? Even in college it is really normal for young lesbians to have crushes on friends who cannot return the feelings simply because their sexual orientation is straight. The key is to not push boundaries. They likely know you are a lesbian or have a hunch. Women, in general, are relatively astute about the emotions around them. Most straight women are not offended at hugs, affection or physical closeness.

You are likely more worried about it than is warranted. However because you have feelings I know it is over whelming and you are balancing your friendship with being physically attracted to your friend. The first thought is that the more touch you have with her the more attracted you will become but in my experience the more you exolore your friendship the less physically interested you will be with her. Chemistry is part of attraction and if she does not share it your feelings will likely dull.

You are more than likely having fantasies about her and feeling very guilty. I just want you to know those thoughts are normal and healthy and are helping you to process your feelings. They can help you to work through the difference between what is wishful thinking and fantasy and reality.

I have had crushes on straight friends and eventually they give way to friendship, expecially as I met other lesbians and bi women who I actually could have mutual attraction to, even it those relationships were also just friendships. As you meet others who share your stories and experiences you will get better and navigating friendships with women. And it is worth the time and effort. And heartache of crushes that will be unfulfilled.

[sexyhomegirl]

Can I be your obession❤️?

[uncertain3teeth]

i hate women coming on mlm posts and evading gay men spaces (specifically the sexual posts abt mlm or fan fiction mlm) like no we dont mean women dni in a oh i hate women way stop trying to make it seem that way or take it that way its annoying we mean it in a "oh im not trying to talk abt me being gay or read a mlm ff without STRAIGHT women coming up in our shit looking like fujoshis" kinda fucking way like mlm is for men like dont act like us gay men dont only do it bc lesbians do it to and i respect thag and dont come in any contact with lesbians bc IM NOT A LESBIANNN like i respect not going in the lesbian ff and lesbian hashtags and straight women or anyone who is a women can do the same for us like its uncomfortable seeing straight ass fucking women in clearly looking at gay men content like i look at mlm asmr and ive seen women in the live streams and shit like ita disgusting like stop being fetishy like we have our space just like you do if we respect your spaces you respect ours its not misogynistic its literally common decency to respect it stop trying to make it seem like its a women hating type thing its not like im trying to say and mean all of this in a nice way its just that straight women with gay men content doesnt sit right with me its weird like its like a gay man looking a lesbian porn it doesnt make sense dont it ? exactly bc we are gay men like the only thing i can come up with is multigenders yall are ok

[joy-the-poet]

Poison-tipped Picket Fences

I hear wives, full of vim and vigor, spitting vitriol about their belligerent husbands.

For years, I've watched him order you around, hide birth control pills, treat his son better than his daughter's, expecting your unwavering service as he weaponises his incompetence.

He tightly controls your appearance, making it abundantly clear, through constant fat-phobic remarks, that he would leave you if you "got fat."

Sex is your responsibility. If you aren't in the mood, you oblige him anyway, or you're not "keeping up your end of the bargain."

I've talked with you, ad nauseum, about this stuff, but not only do you excuse him, but you've turned on me.

Suddenly, I'm "too critical".

That's fucking it.

It's time to look after myself and my partner.

Which, according to you, makes me selfish.

Well, I'd rather spend my dying days with those that nurture us battered souls, than those who would burn me at the stake for their own comfort.

...

By joy-the-poet

[dracarysice]

watching the musketeers and MY MOTHER goes “oh you should read the fanfics they’re quite good” exCUSE ME???

keep in mind this is a show about four attractive men who fight together wearing leather

[sick-sad-world-revolution-now]

*Sees and follow Instagram account of a very active black woman who calls herself a radical feminist and who talk about the intersection of sexism and racism* : 😃😃

*Is disappointed because behind her criticism of gender hides homophobia, being anti formula (???) and some traditional ideas*

Anyway, radical feminism is left wing, doesn’t demonise women for not wanting to breastfeed their babies nor propagate the idea that LGB people are imposing themselves on history or acting like they have an agenda. Straight people do better and don’t act like you’re edgy when you don’t have the best interests of women and same-sex attracted ppl in mind.

[michellezagenda]

that one woman on here harassing gay men for being gay………girl get a JOB or a hobby or something they’ll never love you…grieve and move on.

[chaosandstardust]

One thing I really dislike about the question "Can (straight) men and (straight) women be friends?" is that it's usually approached from the perspective of romance. There is always the assumption that there will be a romantic relationship between these two people if they become too emotionally attached. However I find this to be a very hetero-centric view of relationships, and I would like to pose a question: can men and women be friends, not in terms of romance, but in terms of FRIENDSHIP?

I say this because recently I was hurt quite deeply by a male friend of mine. I won't get into the crux of the issues, because it's really not relevant. But I'd like to forgive him. I'd like to move on. However, he's not really providing any of the emotional support or reassurance that I need to move past it. His solution seems to be "Let's give it more time" when really, that's actually not fixing it. All that ends up happening is that I stew more and get even angrier. He hasn't done anything to actually make up for the problem. He told me that he couldn't reassure me that it won't happen again (which, well, THEN WHAT IS THE POINT OF HIM? WHAT IS THE POINT OF CONTINUING THEN?).

He basically threw our entire friendship out of balance, and I feel very exposed and vulnerable around him right now. I feel like I'm constantly in danger. Now, for full transparency, I have this feeling around a lot of people anyway because as an abuse victim, I often have a little voice in my head going "They're going to hurt you!" but since this has happened, I now have very real proof that he could hurt me that I can point to. And he hasn't actually done anything to reassure me or even meet me on the level that I am at. He doesn't seem to want to do any work to help get me through this.

And I think in his mind it's because I'm not his girlfriend. He would be making more of an effort if I was his girlfriend. And that's where I think this disconnect lies. I admittedly haven't been hurt this way by any of my female friends in my life, but I have had issues with some of them. And in periods where they actually wanted to fix the relationship, they actually talked to me and things changed between us, whether it was through changed behavior, an apology, or a gesture.

Each time, they've done a hell of a lot more than just "idk, man, let's take some time off". Because men and women just have different expectations on how to fix problems in friendships. I want to get to the root of what happened. He just wants to take some time off and doesn't want to reflect on his actions and do better. and THAT'S why (straight) men and (straight) women can't be friends.

write a When Harry Met Sally movie about THAT.

[thehetrophobe]

We need heterophobia

We need heterophobia

We need heterophobia

We need heterophobia

We need heterophobia

We NEED HETEROPHOBIA

WE FUCKING NEED HETEROPHOBIA

The lions must know what it feels like to be hunted for once. Let fire understand what it feels like. Let shit smell what it is. Hate has to see itself in the mirror to know it's ugly.

#we need heterophobia

[tumbler-polls]

This poll is potentially controversial, but the majority of our followers voted to allow it.

Prompt submitted by anon:

Question to cis monosexual people: "Would you date/have sex with a pre-op trans person who identifies as the gender you're into?" Options: 🍷 No; I want my partner to have particular stuff down there / I have a strong genital preference. ☕️ Yes, but I wouldn't want to interact with their genitals. 🧁 Yes, I'm into all kinds of genitals, what matters is how someone identifies. Additional options: cis straight guy / cis gay guy / cis straight woman / cis lesbian.

The other part of this poll is here.

[swiftie-blog-123]

PSA: Stop acting dumb for men. The only men you'll attract are men who don't respect you and think women are stupid.

[cawdra]

Just had a conversation with my straight friend, and she said, "Well, at least he isn't sexually attracted to cars, so 🤷", which made me, a queer person, think:

Straight women's standards are just "He's not a weirdo who wants to fuck inanimate objects, isn't he just dreamy? 🥰" and queer people's (mainly nmlnm) standards are "They could kill me without thinking... I need them in me."

[sherikaterry]

DEEP MELANIN LESBIANS ONLY!!! NO TO, MALES, FAKE LESBIANS & EVERYONE ELSE.

THAT PRETENDING BULLSHIT WAS NEVER CUTE & IT'S IMMATURE. BE HAPPY WITH YOUR BF/HUSBAND & WORK OUT YOUR PERSONAL ISSUES. Y'ALL ARE 🗑

[gayshitnow]

Pro tip for straight and/or bi women!

If you want to find out if a straight guy is worth you time find out if he has any lesbian friends. If the answer is yes I promise you he’s chill. As a lesbian with several straight guy friends who I adore, we are great judges of character because we often don’t crave male attention and they’re attractiveness doesn’t sway our judgment of personality.

If a guy has lesbian friends it tells me three main things:

A. they view women as being interesting and worthy of friendship beyond just wanting to date them. This is huge it could mean that even if a few dates in your not feeling sparks you could have just made a new friend!

B. they don’t fetishize lesbians and are not homophobic which particularly for bi women is pretty crucial!

C. Lesbians tend to be more left leaning so he probably has more liberal leaning politics and is more likely to be a genuine feminist.

D. He can find the clitoris.

[twinkdrama]

girls girls girls your bar is set too low for men. your standards are in hell. you deserve better lol