#that he's actually CONSCIOUS of how he's being bad and he's STILL DOING IT

[ham1lton]

MISS BAD MEDIA KARMA

pairings: (alleged) charles leclerc x reader. lando norris x reader. george russell x reader. (platonic) sebastian vettel x reader.

warnings: misogynistic media and comments.

summary: after a night out with your fellow drivers, the media is alight with rumours and speculation about your romantic life. most people would call a pr meeting, you go through the funniest rumours on instagram live and rate them out of ten.

author’s note: i’m still taking questions/asks/requests so please send some in! also as usual, there is a poll at the end so please vote!

— part of my maneater series ꕤ

START INSTAGRAM LIVE. (20K WATCHING)

Y/N: hi guys! hi! how is everyone? how are you doing?

user1: Y/N NOTICE ME!

user2: y/n girl u look hungover as hell 😭

Y/N: am i hungover? perhaps. that’s probably why i’m doing this. jo is going to kill me but whatever.

user3: what are you planning on doing? 😭

Y/N: after yesterday’s… events. there have been a lot of rumours about me and my fellow drivers that have been spread around social media. so let’s talk through them and rate them out of ten.

user7: ain’t this a pr disaster?

user8: you probably shouldn’t do this.

landonorris: LMFAOOOOOO DO IT

Y/N: lando? how are you not hungover from last night? i’ll start with you. apparently according to this thread by twitter user y/nando, the two of us are secretly engaged to be married. okay first of all, why? second of all, no. i’m sorry. that isn’t happening any time soon. also, my schedule is too packed to be thinking about marriage plans. this one is 2/10 because c’mon.

landonorris: i’m searching that thread right now.

landonorris: wait lol why is this kinda accurate… are you sure we’re not engaged?

user7: LMFAOOOOOO

Y/N: we’re supposed to be EXTINGUISHING the rumours, not adding to them??? we are not engaged. we’re just friends. barely that if anything.

user8: BOOOOOOOOO

y/nando: it’s okay :) you’ll see that you’re perfect for each other one day.

Y/N: will we? anyways. next rumour. according to some monaco newspaper, charles and i have a secret child. this is apparently backed up by some anonymous sources.

landonorris: BOOOOO we get some shitty engagement rumour and you and charles get a child. i want a redo!

charles_leclerc: don’t deny our child y/n 😔

user6: y’all are MESSY 😭

user9: CHARLESY/N SUPREMACY 😍

georgerussell63: end the live y/n 😁👍🏻

Y/N: what is this photo? this is supposed to be proof of my pregnancy? i was just bloated from an evening of indulging at this amazing italian restaurant. it was gorgeous. whoever used this photo is dead wrong for that. this one is 5/10 cause i feel self conscious.

user12: no deadass 😭 if i was famous i would have had a million pregnancy rumours by now.

user68: no charlesy/n baby? BOOO!

Y/N: another one. george and i were spotted buying baby clothes in london. apparently george is me and charles’ baby’s godfather. there is no baby! charles and i don’t have a kid. so george is not the godfather!

georgerussell63: wait… why not? i would be a great godfather actually. i am offended.

user9: george going from telling y/n to switch off the live to being offended he isn’t the godfather of her alleged baby is crazy 😭

Y/N: also why was i shopping with george and not my alleged baby daddy? charles you’re a deadbeat to our non-existent child and that’s why this newspaper is saying that george is raising my kid?

charles_leclerc: apologies to leclerc jr but no way i’m letting george raise him.

georgerussell63: i’m not ready to be a stepdad but c’mon i’d be a great one.

user4: george isn’t the stepdad, he’s the dad that stepped up!

logansargeant: i’m upset that i haven’t been included in these rumors.

Y/N: if i was gonna ask anyone to be my baby’s stepdad it would be oscar. this rumour is 3/10 because it’s so unbelievable.

oscarpiastri: NOOOOOOOO 😰

user9: HELP???

user67: i’m watching this while doing my makeup. y/n is my favourite influencer!

user78: i was watching your vlog when i saw the notification!

Y/N: did you enjoy this vlog? for people who haven’t seen it yet, it’s detailing my offseason with my friends and family! we travelled a little and i did some work with my sponsorships! so check it out. we have some very interesting camera people.

user65: can’t believe you had the usher do your camera work for your superbowl vlog.

user8: you met beyoncé, you never gonna fail!

user67: be honest, did you faint at the sight of all the big celebs?

lewishamilton: y/n, this is all very interesting but maybe you shouldn’t be doing this? - sebastian.

Y/N: seb?? what are you doing here? and why are you on lewis’ account? don’t you have your own?

lewishamilton: i lost my login information 😅 and i got a message from charles telling me to shut this down - sebastian.

Y/N: what a snitch…

user23: he mad y/n didn’t accept their child 😭

Y/N: speaking of sebastian, here is my favourite rumour. that sebastian is my father and i’m his secret lovechild.

youryoungersis: wait…. is that why we look so different? you have a different dad???

lewishamilton: i’m not that much older than you? how can i be your dad? i’m only 13 years older than you! do i look that old? - sebastian, NOT your father.

user7: HELPSOSJSSJ

user5: NOT HIM CLARIFYING 😭😭

Y/N: that one is funny but no. we don’t even look alike! i hear a lot that we have the same mannerisms but that’s probably because i practically grew up around the guy. i’m rating this one…. 7/10.

lewishamilton: grew up around not with! - sebastian, NOT her father.

user2: BRO WE GET IT 😭😭😭😭

Y/N: so basically, time for the last one. this one is definitely the most out of pocket one.

alex_albon: BOOOOO I MISSED MOST OF IT

danielricciardo: 🤣🤣🤣

user98: HELSPSOSJ i’m laughing so hard.

Y/N: oh hi jo! how did you get in? WAIT!-

INSTAGRAM LIVE ENDED. (98K WATCHING)

[icanseethefuture333]

PAC: What your pretty self needs to hear for Valentine's Day ♡

Your heart's message to you + a message from your secret admirer 💌

They say the truth ain't pretty, but coming from that pretty mouth

The truth is fitting, cause you ain't ever talkin' loud

And you know plenty

Yeah, you know what I'm talkin' about

Cause you just get me

Yeah, you so pretty... ♡

Pile 1:

Your heart's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Girl by Destiny's Child

Far by SZA

I MISS YOU SO BAD by iKON

The Lovers, Seven of Cups, & Three of Cups

So what your heart wishes to tell to you is that there is still love out there. You may have previously gotten over an ex, a past crush, or you are in the process of recovering from a break up. In the song "Far" SZA asks Sadhguru how to deal with rejection, in which he responds, "That's great! If nobody wants you then you're free." You have to look on the bright side of things. You also have to know what your worth is. No one else can define your worth but you. You have to be secure with who you are as a person. No one can love the parts you need to heal from. Once you feel fulfilled with who you are as a person. That is when you can form healthy connection with others. I believe you still are hoping for you and this person to get back together but you are hurting yourself even more by obsessing over this person (was going to say focus but instead I heard obsess). Reflect on your current situation and ask yourself, "What wound is this person triggering in me?". What do you need to move on from? To take care of your heart you should do some self reflection. Journaling and shadow work would help provide some clarity. Your heart asks you to not fall back into old habits. Self love is important for your growth, pile 1!

Your secret admirer's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Time To Love by Red Velvet

Changes by Jeff Bernat

I Think I'm Falling by KOHH

Wallflower, New Love, & Union

There is a new love coming in for you! This person could be shy and likes to admire you from afar. They could be self conscious about some things about themselves as well. The feelings seem to be mutual here. There could be a new crush that you like and wish to speak to, but are to nervous to ask them out of fear of rejection. Don't fret! Confessing your feelings helps build courage. If the person rejects you, then that just means there isnsomeone else better out there for you. It is not the end of the world just because you got rejected. Have a little more confidence in yourself, you are great, pile 1! Regardless, I see you and this secret admirer actually being intimate. Things could develop into something more serious with this union card. So make sure to be open to this energy and give them a chance at love ♡

Pile 2:

Your heart's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Mine by Slayyyter

ANTIFRAGILE by LE SSERAFIM

Post To Be by Omarion ft. Chris Brown & Jhené Aiko

Four of Cups, Eight of Wands, & The Fool

Your heart does not want to be tied down at the moment! I believe it has plenty of love to give lol. You also have no problem with turning people down or vice versa. You are looking for a fling and just wish to have a casual relationship! You could have a lot of options in love and would like to explore things romantically, maybe even sexually. Your heart suggests that you focus on your happiness and learn what pleases you. Love does not always have to be serious. Sometimes short lived romances have the best stories to tell! You will be feeling very confident and sexy in your romantic endeavors.

Your secret admirer's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Boys Wanna Be Her by Peaches

No Flex Zone by Rae Sremmurd

STUCK IN MY HEAD by Twice

Open Relationship, Mature Woman, & Fun Times

This secret admirer of yours is honestly hilarious 😭. I kept getting meme songs and I hs to shuffle again to get a proper message. This could be my queer pile as well 🏳️‍🌈. I'm getting Renee Rapp vibes from your secret admirer, Pile 2 😋. They could suit the 'girl crush' aesthetic or if it is someone who identifies as masculine, they have a very pretty face. They are open minded, flirtatious, and exciting to be around. This person wishes to tell you that you are stuck in their head! They find you to be "so fine" 😜! They would like take you out soon. I'm getting it will be a bar date or they will take you dancing at a night club.

Pile 3:

Your heart's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

More Than Enough by Alina Baraz

Bluffin by Brent Faiyaz

Mona Lisa by Naji ft. Monter Booker

Death, Six of Swords, & Six of Pentacles

Oh, pile 3, bless your heart 🥹. You are someone who has such a kind, gentle heart. You have the purest intentions and for that people can tell how geniune you are as a person. You could be selfless and caring towards others. You have so much love to give that it is obvious to others. I don't see any bitterness in your heart and I feel like your heart wishes to tell you how proud it is of you for being able to find forgiveness. You are leaning to let go of the people who have hurt you in the past. The essence of your spirit is so soft and it's very beautiful to witness. Your heart's message to you is that anyone would be lucky to have you in their life. So don't ever feel like you are not enough because you're more than that. You are this cup that is overflowing with love and sincerity.

Your secret admirer's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

At Your Best (You Are Loved) by Aaliyah

Freaky Deaky by Tyga ft. Doja Cat

LOVE by Kendrick Lamar ft. Zacari

Dating, True Love, & True Gem

Your secret admirer absolutely adores you, pile 3. They see your value as a person and they know that there is no one else like you in this world. You have so much love to give and they do as well. I am getting that they want to literally treat you like a princess/princess - just overall royalty. Their have geniune intentions as well and they would like to spoil you this Valentine's day ❤. (Channeled song: Kiss It Better by Rihanna 💋) for a few of you, you and your specific person could be separated. I see that things will turn out for the better soon. So have faith in yourself and in this person for things to work out. They could offer you some sort of proposal, love offer, or a token of their gratitude to show how much they love you. I see things would be passionate, flirty, and romantic for you and your secret admirer 🎆.

Pile 4:

Your heart's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Green Light by Beyoncé

Standing Next To You by Jungkook

God of Music by SEVENTEEN

Two of Pentacles, Page of Wands, & The Magician

You are such an optimistic person, pile 4! You could be someone who often gives advice to others and help others look on the bright side of things. You radiate such positive energy and it makes you a joy to be around. You could be someone who knows what they want and goes after it. You know how to balance your heart with your brain. Intuitive but also logical. People wonder how you are able to turn your ideas into reality. Your heart's message to you is to keep going after your goals and not let anyone distract you from your dreams. As long as you are happy that is all that matters. Your heart also wishes to tell you that whatever makes you light up inside is meant for you. Whatever your heart is set on whether that's a new job, house, etc. You have the ability to manifest whatever you desire.

Your secret admirer's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Phone Me by Che Ecru

Novacane by Frank Ocean

Own It by Drake

Passion, Friendship, & Communication

For some of you, you could be currently in a "situationship" or have a FWB with someone. While for others, your secret admirer is possibly a friend of yours. This person is conflicted on how to approach you. You may receive a text or phone call from them soon where they ask you about your relationship with another. They could ask you how you feel about them or drop hints that they are attracted to you. The ball is in your park, pile 4, if you decide to be more than just friends with this person.

Pile 5:

Your heart's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Girl Like Me by Alexa Demie

Fulfillment? By Kilo Kish

Baddie by IVE

Eight of Cups, Two of Cups, & Seven of Swords

I am getting like "manic pixie dream girl" vibes from you, Pile 2. Something about you is hard to pin point to others. Mysterious but also so enchanting. You know you are someone who is complex but also so beautiful. You have these interesting quirks that makes you stand out and memorable to others. You are comfortable with who you as a person and it could have took you a long time to get to a place of being this self assured. You could have a child like wonder as well and it is admirable to others. You could be questioning what direction to take in life and could find "adulting" very hard but don't give up, pile 5! Everything will be okay in the end. Your heart's message to you is to learn what gives you emotional fulfillment in life. Also to not take shit from no one. What's interesting is your face could look quite sweet but you are actually feisty and have a firey spirit. There is a duality to your personality and its attractive. I am getting like Song Jia, Alexa Demie, Wonyoung, & Taylor Russell vibes from you, pile 5. Your heart wants you to embrace your confidence and focus on the abundance in your future. Do not let people drag you down and dim your light. Your heart believes it is time for some self pampering. Set your standards high in love and know that you are deserving of everything you desire. I also believe it is time to burn bridges with people who no longer serve you. How can you live the life of your dreams if other people only acknowledge the version of yourself that no longer resonates with you? If you wish to be the girl of your dreams, you have to learn to put yourself first.

Your secret admirer's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Lilith by Halsey

Ditto by NewJeans

High Fashion by Roddy Rich ft. Mustard

Triangle, Travel, & Spiritual Growth

What is this Single's Inferno?! You have options, pile 5. You could have more than one secret admirer. You could be observing your current options in love and feeling "Well! Let the best person win☺️!" I see people wanting to fly you out and pay for your trips, oh my🫠. One of the people you will date could be popular or have a well known social status. You give people butterflies and some of you may know what affect you have on people, while some of you are innocent to the fact. You could receive love confessions or you may even already have. I feel like you are the type of person who receives love letters, jewelry, candies, and box of chocolates, if not you are going to be spoiled for this Valentine's day! You could meet your secret admirer(s) while traveling or when going on vacation. Your secret admirer's message to you is that they "like you" and hoping you feel the same 💕. They want to understand your love language and words of affirmations / gift giving could be one of their love languages in particular.

Pile 6:

Your heart's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Rose by Miyeon

Honey Dew by Lion Babe

Chanel by TiaCorine

King of Pentacles, Five of Wands, & Queen of Cups

I feel like you are at odds with your heart and brain right now, pile 6. You seem to feel confused about a decision you have to make. I believe you could think things are "sweeter" in other people's lives but that is not necessarily true. I know sometimes we can want what other people have but if it gets to the point of comparing yourselves to others then its not healthy. You have to remember to be grateful for what you have in life. It's okay to want the finer things, but what are you overlooking when you are doing that? Your heart's message to you is to not worry about what other people are doing in life and instead focus on what makes you great of a person. You are just as lovable, sweet, and beautiful.

Your secret admirer's message to you:

Shufflemancy -

Congratulations by Mac Miller ft. Bilal

Little Things by Sunni Colón

Aura by Mariah The Scientist

Work, Money, & Long Distance

I believe you and this person are already in a relationship. If not, your secret admirer will be the next person you end up in a romantic relationship with. This person could live further away from you and has a high paying job. They prefer to take on a traditional role of a provider. This person could have a hard time discussing their feelings though and shows their love through acts of services. While you, I feel you are more of an emotional person. You both could have a hard time expressing your feelings and thoughts properly to each other, which would cause conflict. Things might be tense for Valentine's Day. You and your secret admirer could have strong feelings for each other, but there needs to be an important conversation had in order for this relationship to progress. Both of you could be disheartened by this but there's hope! Try to appreciate the little things in your relationship and not focus on being the "perfect couple", for that does not exist. Every relationship has its flaws and all that matters is that you and you partner love each other very much. If it's meant to be, it will be, it won't be something you have to force, it'll come naturally.

[lenaellsi]

after my latest rewatch I am even more convinced that crowley really doesn't have the intense self-loathing issues he's commonly depicted with. like he has some regrets and bad memories and insecurities like everyone does, and he's under an insane amount of stress basically always, but he's very confident in who he is. he's not particularly happy about being a demon, but that isn't the same thing as hating himself for it. he hates hell, not himself.

like. he’s not upset about being called one of “the bad guys” because he agrees, he’s upset because he knows aziraphale is wrong, and because this is evidence that aziraphale still believes in a philosophy that has divided them since even before his fall. he has never once considered himself less than aziraphale or any other angel. I think it's clear that he's pretty offended by that implication, actually!

“crawly” as a name is too squirming-at-your-feet-ish for him because he knows who he is, and he sees value in that person. his depression and his worrying relationship with his own life and safety come from his feelings on god and predestination, not from self-loathing. crowley does not believe in the system. he doesn’t believe in the idea that people are purely good or evil, and he’s sure enough of himself to know that he's not either. that's why he's able to make the choices he does. he's able to act in the gray spaces between heaven and hell (see: job, the flood, the "virtues of poverty," armageddon, etc etc) because he is confident enough to make those decisions without worrying about what the powers that be say about what's "right" and "wrong."

that doesn’t mean that he’s not self-conscious. he’s very concerned with what humans think of him, what aziraphale thinks of him, and (out of self-preservation) what hell thinks of him. he hides his eyes and puts on a cool, flashy persona to hide the more vulnerable parts of himself. I think everyone does that, to a degree, but it's especially obvious in crowley because of how it manifests in his glasses. he's been burned (literally) before, and he knows better than to show weakness when he could be hurt like that again.

and re: the "I never meant to fall" thing--he's upset about being a demon, yeah, because the fall sounds like it sucked, and his job tortures him when he's Good or just Bad in the wrong way, and he's deeply lonely, and the love of his life has a complex about their relationship, and he's trapped in a system where he has to blindly follow one of two nearly-identical sets of bullshit morality rules or be executed. but again, he's mad at god, heaven, and hell for all of that. I'm sure he's angry at himself for all sorts of reasons often enough, because crowley is generally a pretty angry person, but he doesn't hate himself in any sort of existential "I am an unlovable monster" way.

maybe sometimes he regrets falling. maybe sometimes he thinks it would be easier if he never did. maybe sometimes he hates his fucking line manager and wishes he could do any other job for a while. but no part of crowley thinks that he is any worse of a person after the fall, or any less worthy of aziraphale's company. he just thinks aziraphale thinks that, because of the amount of times aziraphale has told him so.

[toji-girl]

i actually think i have a problem - i have a serious lactation kink like idk why 😭 i was wondering if you could possibly write a toji x reader w lactation kink and literally anything else you’d like to add 🥹

- 🩰

toji and lactation kink go hand in hand so ofc! I gotcha also the idea of letting him do that is so sensual and intimate and just skhnsjkhsr!! I want him so bad.

tags: 18+ only content - mdni + fem reader + lactation kink + you're mamaguro + Megumi is a newborn + this has no smut in it actually lmao but I enjoyed writing this either way - if you want smut just lmk for sure 😏😏

Any time you heard any baby, and not just your son wail at the top of their new lungs your shirt would become a soaking mess, the high-pitched cries were enough to have you flustered and embarrassed.

It couldn't be helped though.

Breastfeeding a very hungry baby is a full-time job.

Also, having a husband who was curious about it as well seemed to be a part-time job, he'd watch Megumi suckle from your breast until he fell asleep completely milk-drunk. "Is it sweet?" He questioned from the other side of the room wanting to know what it tasted like.

At first, it was just a curiosity thing then it slowly turned into a burning need that he couldn't get out of his head, and a few times he's helped massage your breast to help with a clogged duct.

"Ya know I love how much bigger these have gotten," Toji murmured one evening when the both of you had some downtime while Megumi slept in his room down the hallway, large palms cupping your breasts feeling the milk start to bead on your nipples, and through the shirt soaking the fabric.

You narrowed your eyes at him and rolled them playfully. "I thought you liked them before?" You asked feeling a little self-conscious after giving birth which was something your husband knew about.

"I love every inch of you doll, you just gave birth to our son, you're badass." He murmured moving in closer to you, his words were an attempt to soothe any worries you have and it helped a little.

He nudged at your side almost like a dog before slipping his hands up your shirt. "Megumi won't be awake for a while, if you keep doing that I'm going to have to pump." You whined softly when he used the advantage of how huge his shirt was on you to poke his head underneath it and kiss your stomach slowly.

"Let me help then," Toji murmured causing you to pull the neck away to look at him still hidden under the shirt, his hot breath fanned over your breast that he inched closer to, the milk dripping down your sides making you wet and sticky. He watched as you nodded slowly.

You knew it would help so you let him latch onto your nipple drawing the bud into his mouth gently making you hiss with relief when he began to suck drawing the milk out. "Gentle! They feel like chew toys for our son." You hummed and rubbed his back groaning softly.

It didn't take him long for him to switch to your other breast, his bulge becoming prominent as he slid one arm under your back to tug you closer to him. "Feel any better?" Toji asked when he pulled away licking his lips and pulling his head out from under your shirt.

"A lot....thank you." You looked at him a little shy making him chuckle and wipe his mouth before he kissed you and let you curl into his side ready to fall into a deep sleep after being awake for so long.

[redr0sewrites]

Aftercare Hcs with Lucifer <3

i wanted to write sum for him to start off my entrance into the hazbin fic writers fandom ajdjdjdj-

🥀 Cw: none, mentions of previous sex, fluff, lucifer being whipped and sleepy

lucifer is most definitely WHIPPED for you, no matter how long the two of you have been together he is the type to fall HARD

this transfers into aftercare, but also affection with him in general

he is especially clingy after sex, he wants all of your praise and attention~ who are u to refuse?

i feel like lucifer is the type to definitely prioritize cuddles and physical contact over cleaning up, he doesn't care how messy the bed is as long as he gets to be held by u!!

you often have to carry him to the bath while hes half asleep, he'll pout and whine about how hes "perfectly fine"

"do we haaavee to get up?"

"darling, do you want to sleep in your own cum?"

"...fine"

lucifer would absolutely feel bad about leaving the entire mess for u to clean up and will always offer to assist u

mind u, he can barely stand upright from exhaustion and hes covered in bites and bruises and soaked in sweat and... fluids

join him in the bath after cleaning up, you two have a giant bath that can fit the both of you (perks of being rich) that often leads to another softer round of sex or just sweet cuddles and massages

SPEAKING OF MASSAGES!!!!! HE WILL TOTALLY GIVE U MASSAGES WHEN YOU JOIN HIM, ALONG WITH WASHING YOUR BACK AND HAIR ETC

wash his wings, he will melt

praise him, tell him how good he was for you and how good he made you feel, it may not seem huge on your end but bc of how self conscious he is it definitely boosts his ego

once you both actually get to bed, his favorite cuddling position is either spooning, or just laying beside you with his arms (and wing) draped over you as your both pressed as close to eachother as possible. he loves when your faces are super close together too, so he can press soft kisses to your lips or boop your noses together

speaking of spooning, he will be little or big spoon! i hc him as a switch, so the same way he'll top or bottom in bed, lucifer is def down for being held and cuddled or holding you!!

lucifer is the type to enjoy soft chatter as you two drift to sleep, he loves getting to ramble to you about his latest rubber duck or his day or anything he wants, while you enjoy listening to him and admiring him while he slowly drifts off

he asks the weirdest questions after sex, especially when it was very intimate. hes def gonna ask u if u would still love him as a worm and then turn into a worm for good measure

"duckie, if you were an ant monarch, and you got to name your own ant hill, what would you name it?"

"...."

all the while, lucifer is just smiling this big goofy grin, watching you with lidded eyes and soaking in the warmth of getting to be with you

he just loves the fact that hes yours, that the two of you get to share these intimate moments together and that you both care for eachother so much

he falls asleep mid sentence too, it's actually really cute

"and then, *yawn*, i said.... like.... mhm... "

"goodnight luci~"

AUGHWHEHEEEHEHHEHEHEHEUEHEHEHEGEHESUAHAIEJEGEJEH

the soul ascending love i have for him and hazbin hotel is not normal i swear. expect more soon and please, for the love of all things good and holy, send in reqs im begging 👹

also sorry this is so shit i was gonna make this a full scenario but decided it was more fun as hcs bUUUUT i can do a scenario if yall want- i live to please

[empresskylo]

I’m begging for you to write about virgin!Ghost and virgin!reader,lots of love 🩷x

virgin!simon 'ghost' riley x virgin!afab!reader

a/n: this truly spoke to me, so thank you for this. i wanted to write a pathetic, nervous ghost, but decided to write him how i actually think he'd act if he was a virgin.

warnings: mentions of SA (reference to ghost's past as mentioned in his comics where he is SA'd); smut

cod masterlist

Who would ever think Simon Riley was a virgin?! 

I mean look at the man!! Rough and assertive. A lieutenant who everyone is afraid of. Easily in his mid-to-late thirties. Crude with his jokes. A damn war criminal. Why would anyone in their right mind assume he was a virgin? 

Except that wasn’t the whole picture. Simon stood witness to how his dad treated women when he was younger. Saw the way he mistreated sex workers. And Simon didn’t want to become like his father, so he ended up distancing himself from girls his age, afraid it might be in his genetics to be shitty. And he watched his “friend” almost assault a woman once—Simon was disturbed, desperate to not emulate that. And not to mention he was big and scary, he was worried he’d frighten women, so he just avoided them for the most part. And when he was sexually assaulted, he thought maybe sex just wasn’t for him. 

And now he was older. Too old to be a virgin, he thought. He wasn’t a self-conscious man, but he didn’t want to disappoint anyone in bed either, so the more he put it off, the more he didn’t want to do it all together. He also found it hard to form relationships in his line of work, and he refused to pay for sex. 

So, by his mid-thirties, he was still a virgin.

Then he met you and it felt so easy being with you. He felt himself wanting to grind against you the first time you kissed—that's when he realized how depraved he had been for so long, he didn’t realize how much he was truly missing.

And one night, after you and him had been a thing for a little while, you finally got the nerves to kiss him and straddle his lap. His hands naturally found your waist and he ran them up and down your sides, gently squeezing your flesh above your clothes. 

Then you pulled back, looking down a bit shyly. 

“What’s a’matta?” he asked you, his hands still firmly gripped on your hips.

“I, uhm,” you stuttered. “I’ve never done this before.” There, you finally said it. You were so worried Simon would become awkward when you told him, what if he didn’t want to be with someone so inexperienced? And you didn’t know if he was going to be uncomfortable with the idea of being your first time—that maybe he didn’t want that responsibility.

His hand slid up and nudged your chin to look at him. Simon was already planning to go as far as you’d let him, and he had decided he wasn’t going to tell you he had never done this before. If you said he was bad in bed, he’d apologize and lie, saying it had just been a long time since he’d been laid. But then you admitted you were in the same boat as him (aside from the fact that you were much younger than him.)

“Me neither,” he admitted.

Your eyes met his and you cracked the smallest of grins. “Don’t make fun of me!” 

He tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear. “M’not.”

You blinked at him. “R-Really?”

He chuckled. “Never really had the opportunity, I’suppose.” That was the short version.

“Oh.”

You squirmed on top of him and he groaned. “That, uhm. Makes me a little less embarrassed.” Your eyes averted his.

Before you could ramble more about it, Simon jerked your head down to kiss him. “Happy to help.”

You smiled against his lips and Simon gripped your hips tightly in his hands, pulling you down against him. You would have thought he’d be a little more reserved, awkward even, having never had done this before. But Simon Riley was a confident man. He was self-assured. Bold. Fearless. And he wasn’t going to let his lack of experience hinder the potential between the two of you.

You gasped, feeling how hard he was in his pants as he yanked you against him. He hummed against your lips, the softness of them making him imagine what they might feel like wrapped around his cock. 

When you whimpered in the back of your throat, Simon was quick to twist you around and lay you flat on your back on the couch. He bullied himself between your legs and refused to let you catch your breath before his lips were back on yours. 

“Please,” he begged pathetically, pawing at the hem of your shirt. 

You gave him room and he stripped you quickly, clearly enthusiastic about having you naked beneath him. You clawed at his shirt and he was more than happy to oblige, tearing it over his chest and unbuckling his pants. 

Your knees had come together as you watched him strip and he smirked. His hands slid along your calf before pulling your legs apart and weaseling his way back to where he was. He kissed you again, both of you anticipating what was to come, but nervous at the same time. 

You bucked your hips up as his hands traced your bare side. He broke the kiss. “Want me t’touch you, love?”

You nodded your head, your face warming. His hand snaked its way between your bodies, tracing the apex of your thighs and rubbing against you. “L-Lower,” you gasped. His fingers shifted and you couldn’t constrain the moan. 

“There?” He asked you, tilting his head as he admired your wanton expression. 

Your breathing hitched when his fingers found your entrance. “Jus’ tell me if you want me t’stop,” he whispered against your lips. 

When you said nothing in response, he pushed one finger inside you. You squeezed around him tightly, your body trying to push him back out. You arched your back off the couch as he shoved his finger all the way inside of you. He began to pump his fingers, you were already soaking for him.

He watched you intently, the obscene noises from his fingers shifting inside you making him harder than he thought possible. It was also making him blush and causing his heart to race. His fingers might have trembled slightly if they weren’t buried inside you, busy at work. Your eyes locked with his, your brows furrowing, feeling him slide another finger in along the first. He was a bit clumsy as he worked you, but it felt good just the same.

“My god,” you gasped. 

Simon groaned when you clenched tightly around his two fingers, imagining how that would feel around his cock instead. 

“Sound so pretty,” he cooed.

Your arms grasped at his biceps, your hips rising to meet each pump of his fingers. “Want you inside me,” you whimpered.

Simon clicked his tongue. “Already inside you, love,” he teased, curing his fingers upwards as if to say, see.

You pouted, your body jolting with electricity from the deep baritone of his voice. His fingers stretched you out plenty, you weren’t sure how he was supposed to fit inside you… but you wanted to find out. You wanted to feel the pressure of his throbbing cock. You wanted to watch him grunt and groan with pleasure above you. You almost wished he would come prematurely, too drunk from fucking you to keep himself together. You were the first person he was going to fuck and a strange swell of satisfaction filled your already racing chest.

“Si-Simon,” you whined.

He smirked before slipping his fingers out of you. You watched through half-lidded eyes as he sucked the wetness from his fingers, his eyes darkening and never breaking contact from yours.

“Want me t’fuck you, sweet girl?” he asked, gripping his cock in his fist and giving it a few pumps.

You watched and swallowed before letting out a pathetic, “Yes.”

He fell back on top of you, his hands on either side of your head, his knees bent on the couch as he settled himself between you. You shifted your hips to give him a better angle as he lined himself up with you. You both watched as he moved himself between your bodies. “Tell me if I’m hurtin’ ya.”

Before you had a chance to respond, Simon was pushing the head of his cock inside of you. He was a bit rough when he entered you—a bit jittery and weak with anticipation—though he tried desperately not to be. You squeezed your eyes shut, your nails digging into his biceps. Simon groaned, edging himself in a little at a time. “You okay, baby?” He asked you.

Your eyes fluttered open and you gave a hesitant nod. “Yes. Keep going.”

His thumb stroked your cheek then brushed over your bottom lip. Your fingers slid up his back, dancing over the corded muscle and scars under your fingertips. Simon edged himself in, then out, and repeated that until he could finally seat himself fully inside you. Your thighs clamped around his waist, wanting to stop the intrusion on instinct. 

“M’ all in,” he told you, his breath airy like he had just run a mile.

“Oh, thank god,” you said exasperated.

Simon chuckled, the deepness of his voice vibrating through his chest and across yours. 

“Can I move?” He asked you.

You swallowed, the stinging between your thighs subduing. You nodded. Simon leaned down to kiss you, his dog tag dragging across your chest, the cool metal warming. Your lips parted, his own moving against yours. Simon devoured the gasp you slid into the kiss when he pulled out halfway. He pushed himself back in and you groaned, a small whimper forming in the back of your throat. He grabbed your thigh, hiking it up slightly so he could get a better angle. 

He continued to thrust inside you, only pulling out halfway each time, before struggling to push himself back in. He kept at a slightly awkward rhythm, grunts slipping past his lips and ghosting across yours. His head slid into the crook of your neck, your nails digging into his back, but Simon could barely feel that. All he was focusing on was how heavenly you found surrounding him. 

“Shit,” he moaned, surprised at how fast he was approaching the end. Simon knew that plenty of men struggled to get off the first time from sheer nerves. Others lasted barely any time at all. But he also knew women seemed to struggle the first time, not even expecting to orgasm until much later down the line. 

Simon wasn’t going to let that happen. He slowed his pace, only doing small little thrusts, his hips rolling against yours, pushing you back into the mattress. His hand snaked between your bodies, finding your clit, and rubbing circles. You arched your hips up to get him to touch you at a better spot and you mewled. 

“Close?” he beckoned. 

Surprisingly, you were. You hadn’t thought you’d actually get this close to orgasming your first time. You thought you’d be a ball of self-conscious nerves. But with Simon, you felt comfortable. Relaxed. Excited. Beautiful. And the way his fingers were putting pressure between your legs was making you see stars.

He continued his small pumps, wanting to focus on you more than himself, but he couldn’t help but growl in the back of his throat, your warmth tightening around him. 

His movements grew more rapid and you cried out his name. He cursed, feeling you spasm around him as he led you into your climax, his final ruts sending you over the edge. You finally clenched down so hard, Simon had to pull out, rubbing himself against your clit and coming onto your stomach. 

He groaned, “Fuckin’ hell.”

You were panting, your chest rising and falling in rapid beats. It took you both a moment to collect yourselves. He stared down between your bodies, taking in the sight. Now that you weren’t in the heat of the moment, you suddenly felt self-conscious, all too aware of the way your entire body was laid bare to him. 

Your hand shifted to cover your chest and he clicked his tongue. “You’re so fuckin’ gorgeous, love.”

Your chest swooned from his admiration. He quickly leaned over to grab his t-shirt to clean you off. You felt your face warm before he scooped you up into his arms, ready to carry you to the bathroom. 

“Good?” He asked.

A simple question. But one he needed to hear the answer to.

“Perfect.”

Simon grinned, trying to suppress his teeth from showing, but he couldn’t help it. He tucked you closer into his chest as he marched you both to the bathroom. 

[twogyuu]

[959]

pairing: wonwoo x fem!reader

genre: fluff(?), mutual pining, unestablished relationship, medical!au

warnings: mentions of blood/cutting self on accident, vague mentions of "going out"

a/n: yes, i think about doctor!wonwoo a lot actually -

. . . .

This is so embarrassing.

On your last full weekend off this month, you find yourself back at work - and worse! Not as a provider, but a patient!

So much for living your best life this weekend.

"And," Seungkwan drags out the single word as he fans the betadine to dry, "We're done."

He looks up at you and smiles sheepishly. There's a spark in his eye - one that you reminded you of yourself what seemed like many years ago. You peer down at your finger: three simple sutures neatly threaded through your wound and knotted just tight enough.

"How'd I do, Y/N?" Seungkwan asks excitedly, he's almost bouncing on the balls of his feet.

You shoot him a soft smile, flexing your finger at him.

"Oh!" a look of panic flashes over his eyes.

"Not bad, Boo, not bad at all," you compliment, "I'll be good as new by next week."

"Tsk," Seungkwan scolds briskly. He puts the sharp in the red bin and swipes the wrappers off the metal tray. "Take it easy - you know the rules: stitches come out in about a week. I'll put some bacitracin on it and bandage it up for the night, but open and dry while it heals."

"Yes, yes, Dr. Boo," you tease playfully.

"I'm not yet, Y/N!" he chuckles.

"You'll take them out, right?" you point at your finger, ignoring his protests.

"I won't be here next week," Seungkwan replies sadly, "New rotation."

"Ah," you nod.

"I'm sure Soonyoung will though," Seungkwan adds hopefully.

"Yeah, um, I don't know if I trust him."

"What?! Y/N, he's an EM resident."

"Yes, but-"

The glass door to your small room slides open, interrupting your banter. The both of you turn to look who it is and you feel your heart constrict the moment you notice the way the bright light reflects against his round, wire-framed glasses. Wonwoo closes the door behind him and leans on the door handle, looking back and forth between you and Seungkwan before he turns his attention all to you.

Teeth sinking into your bottom lip, you tear your gaze away, cheeks and tips of your ears burning. You feel yourself suddenly growing self-conscious in Wonwoo's presence: your eyeliner a little too dark, your lashes coated in too dark of mascara, foundation caked on a little too heavily to hide your dark circles from sleepless nights, your shoulders suddenly feeling the hidden breeze in the ED, and your skirt seems too short.

"Did I interrupt something?" Wonwoo finally asks, his words calm and slow.

Seungkwan's breath hitches in your stead and he shakes his head furiously. You can feel Wonwoo's eyes burning holes through your scalp, but you refuse to look at him in this state.

"I should, um," Seungkwan scratches the back of his head. He grumbles awkwardly, "I'm going to go get the ointment and the bandage."

Wonwoo nods and moves to let him leave, though this causes him to step closer towards you. You scoot on your cot as if it would create a substantial space between you enough to breathe.

The silence only ensues, you quietly willing him away, not ready to face him. Wonwoo seems to get the message, deciding to intervene instead.

"Soonyoung told me what happened," Wonwoo explains. There's a stuffy tone in his voice - like he felt awkward being there. "I . . . just thought I'd come down to check," he inhales sharply, "You know, because . . . I, um, care about you and stuff."

You still don't answer, but, oh, were you cursing Kwon Soonyoung right now.

You can't help but notice, though, out of the corner of your eye, you notice how he adjusts his glasses on the bridge of his nose, proceeding to brush his bangs out of his eyes. He's been growing out his hair, and though you're typically not a big fan of long hair, he didn't look half bad.

Heck, he didn't look half bad - he looks good.

Wonwoo huffs, the black fringes fluffing up in the process. "Are you going to just ignore me like that? I have all night - I'm on call."

Yeah, right, you want to shoot back, like he isn't busy as a cardiology fellow on-call.

You reach for the sheets on the cot and wrapping them around your shoulder, squeezing your eyes and sighing heavily. Instead you tell him, "You didn't need to come down."

"I wanted to," Wonwoo replies sharply.

"I didn't . . . I don't want you to see me like this," you grumble.

You hear him shifting from foot to foot behind you. "Like what?"

You shrug. "Like this."

"And what would that be?" he presses. The clack of his leather shoes on the white tile nears you. You can make out his figure in the spotless reflection.

Oh did he know how to press your buttons and make you squeamish.

Unable to bear it much longer, you threw off your sheets and spin around to face him. You dare to look up at him, pressing your tinted lips into a tight line. Unlike what you were expecting, his eyes only remain trained on yours. He doesn't scan your body up and down, his usual knitted brows and scowl in judgement.

"I'm embarrassed," you whisper, frowning.

This makes him chortle and you let out a small whine.

"Why?" he finally asks when his laughter settles a little.

"I dunno," you fumble with your words like you were a middle schooler in trouble and unsure of your feelings. "I-I . . . we just haven't . . . you haven't seen me like this."

"Like I don't know outside being a resident, you're also a normal young adult who likes to go out?" he states more than he asks.

"Something like that," you mutter. Hopeful to change the topic, you add, "So much for some apple slices before then."

Thankfully, whether you like it or not, Wonwoo knows you a little too well. This is one of the moments he decides not to push you further. He only hums, reaching for your injured finger. Gently, he weaves his own fingers in, lifting them at the knuckles to look at the repaired wound. It sets your body aflame again and you silently slap yourself.

You weren't even holding hands! Why were you so flustered?

"Seungkwan did a nice job," Wonwoo notes.

"He did," you squeak.

"Much better than I could," Wonwoo adds.

"He's still a medical student eager to learn and Soonyoung's grading him - not burnt out farts like us," you joke.

"I meant it as," Wonwoo chuckles, "I specialize the heart - not wounds."

You're not sure why you aren't careful with your words tonight. Maybe you are too comfortable with him too soon, maybe it's the betadine seeping into your wound and into your veins.

But you let it slip accidently.

"Yet, you're blind as a bat when it comes to matters of the heart."

Wonwoo's eyes widen, flickering up to look at you.

"W-what?"

"Um-"

"Okay," the glass door slides open and Seungkwan waddles in, with his arms full of supplies. Soonyoung is not too far behind him - he needs to check the laceration repair before the student patches it up. "We didn't have any two-by-two's so I got some four-by-fours to cut up and . . ."

Seungkwan's voice trails off as he feels Soonyoung's hand on his shoulder, holding him back from proceeding further as the older man sees it before he does.

Seungkwan holds the supplies close to his chest and points at himself, innocently, "Did I interrupt something this time?"

[gabrielsbubblegumbitch]

this may be hard to answer because we don’t actually know the characters too well yet, but what do you think vox and val actually *love* about eachother? it seems like it’s more than just sex between them, and i’m curious to know what you think their relationship is like outside the toxic or sexual parts

Anon, to me it is not hard to answer at all, I think about it constantly 🩵❤️ of course all I write is based mostly on my headcanons and interpretations.

So... What Vox loves about Valentino? First and foremost, he makes him feel free. Vox is very self-conscious; he has a lot of internalized shame that he tries to cover with his grandiosity and fake smile. Valentino is unapologetically himself, and no matter how annoying it can be, Vox admires it. He's like the least judgmental person, and except for his temper tantrums, he's quite chill. Vox can't handle something? Val doesn't care; he still thinks his boyfriend is smart and will figure shit out eventually. Vox discovers he's into some weird, socially unacceptable kink? Great, they can try it. Vox rambles for hours about sharks? Good, he has a passion; Valentino likes people with passion, he will listen, he likes his voice anyway. Vox, who has spent his whole life crafting this perfect narrative about himself, cherishes the opportunity to feel comfortable enough with other people (a lot of these things apply also to his friendship with Velvette) to act like an absolute idiot around them.

Also, I think Valentino can be a really amazing boyfriend - he can be funny, charming, and mindful of the other person. That's his whole thing; he deals with desires, and that's why people get addicted to him so quickly. In most cases, it inevitably ends with him taking absolute control over the other person and becoming abusive. But Vox is his partner, so he gets just those nice bits because Valentino knows he wouldn't be able to put him down like he did with Angel. Not that he'd want to; he likes having a partner who's equal to him, whom he can break only if he allows him to do so (yes, my reading of them is very BDSM-ish, don't @ me). Valentino wants to be loved, he loves the idea of love, surrounds himself with hearts but at the same refuses to adjust to societal norms in the way that makes him unlovable; every person he ever loved (in his mind, his obsessive desire equals love) rejected him eventually after he revealed his true nature to them. But not Vox. Vox accepts him as broken as he is, and despite all his toxicity, Vox is reliable, he's the most stable part of Valentino's life. He has the patience to deal with his mood swings, he can always find the solution when Val messes something up, he's willing to accept all the attention Valentino wants to give him, and he supports his passions (ruining lives, making weird porn and abusing people).

Essentially, their love is largely about finally finding the other person who is as bad as you are, who accepts you no matter what and helps you grow (become an even worse person).

And some additional things:

Valentino really likes how smart Vox is. He himself is impulsive and acts instantly on his urges because violence is always an answer so he's kinda impressed when Vox presents him with some elaborate plots.

Vox loves Valentino's creativity, aesthetic, and attention to detail. He really likes nice things, but he lacks the ability to understand the nuance that is necessary for creating art.

They both enjoy each other's sense of humor.

Vox really likes that Valentino is kinda dumb? He can take care of him, and he likes taking care of people because it allows him to prove himself as The Best Boyfriend. He doesn't necessarily gets the idea of unconditional love, so the fact that he has an opportunity to earn it makes him feel more secure in their relationship. That's also why he loves spoling Valentino with gifts which is perfect because Valentino loves being spoiled.

Valentino likes being a little silly when he's with Vox. At work he can't manage people with his competence, so he does it with fear. But yelling and throwing people around is exhausting; he sometimes wants to bedazzle his gun while watching some trashy reality TV and bitching about his hard day at work. It's okay because Vox is also a little silly.

Valentino generally helps Vox live life more. He helped him come out of the closet (in my headcanon Vox for his whole life struggled with internalized biphobia); shows him that emotions other than anger are acceptable and don't mean weakness; even small things like always insisting on getting nice meals (while Vox could live his whole life on black coffee and rice) or decorating their apartment with fancy yet useless stuff.

They're both power-crazy maniacs, so the idea of being with someone who is widely desired by others and could destroy them if they wished is just so incredibly hot.

Vox | Valentino | What they hate about each other

If you liked these you should definitely check out my fic

[spacedace]

Bit from a new dpxdc fic rattling around in my head I'm calling the Meddling Kids AU.

This snippet is so far removed from the context of the larger fic that I can't even imagine what yall are gonna think it's even about, which means it's perfect to throw out as a writing prompt for anyone that's interested haha

---

Well.

Good news: Jon had something that very publicly proved he couldn't be Superboy.

Bad news: his proof came in the form of getting his nose broken in front of the entire school cafeteria.

Weird news: tiny, waifish Danielle Masters - of all people - was the one who managed to actually break his nose when he'd stepped in to try to pull her off of Trip Hemmings.

She wasn't Kryptonian. Not unless Trip and his cronies were also secretly Kryptonians this whole time. She'd fucked them all up almost single-handedly when they'd tried to pull their usual shit with Fredrick Kern and she stepped in. But they were the ones that had started the whole messy fight when Trip decided to sucker punch the petite girl hard enough that the loud, ugly crunch of her broken nose had been heard even over the noise of the cafeteria, shoving her back into the cafeteria table and sending Fredrick's food flying.

She'd gotten slammed a couple more times during the scuffle, but she had given far more than she'd gotten and by the time Jon and Damian and managed to make their way through the crowd of students that had rapidly swarmed the scene of the fight, Trip's two goons were laying on the ground, conscious but groaning in pain and decidedly taken out of the fight.

Jon had surged forward through the crush of the gathered students towards where Danielle and Trip were. The latter sprawled across the table with Danielle on top of him, bleeding and bruised and feral looking with her bared teeth and wild eyes as she wailed down punch after punch on Trip's face. The fight was well and truly over at that point, Danielle clearly the victor, and teachers were on their way. Without even thinking about it Jon had reached out and touched her arm, intending to pull her off the little shit she was rightly wailing on before she could get in even more trouble for being involved with a fight.

It hadn’t been the wisest course of action. Danielle had been so keyed up she hadn't even realized it was him or absorbed anything he'd said, and assuming it was someone looking to hurt her turned one of her swings onto him. He'd had the spit second thought of how he was going to avoid the hit without looking like he had powers when her fist had collided with his face at a speed he hadn’t expected and sent him sprawling to the ground. It wasn't until he felt something hot dripping down his face that he realized she'd actually broken his nose and the pain flooded in.

So.

Danielle Masters was strong enough to break his nose. And still hadn’t managed to hurt anyone else - including fragile, normal humans - past some bad bruised and busted noses. She'd likely hit him as hard as she had out of blind reaction and not true intention to do real harm.

That was a thing.

A weird thing with some big implications.

D had checked, and Danielle Masters wasn't registered as a meta. Which didn't mean she wasn't one or that there was even anything nefarious going on. The uber-rich elite tended to cover things like that up, fine with meta rights and metas running around so long as it wasn't one of their own.

But it was still something.

She was strong enough to break Jon's nose. The number of entities in the world able to do that wasn't a very long list. The fact that a random girl at his school was capable of that was...not necessarily anything to be worried about. But the thing was that Danielle Masters was already someone he and D had been keeping an eye on as being...a little bit beyond the normal kind of weird. And that wasn't even getting into her dad's shady business or the potential connection between her and the weird spike in suicides.

“Here,” He blinked, pulled out of his thoughts at once to find the girl taking up all of them had shifted in her chair over to him to hold out an actual handkerchief to him. “Sorry about…” She motioned with her other hand towards his bloody face, wincing a little as she did. “You didn’t deserve that.”

He took the offered piece of fabric - oddly formal and old fashioned for anyone, let alone a girl like Danielle Masters - as the peace offering it was and offered her an awkward smile. “It was my fault for coming at you from behind,” He said, trying not to be too amused by the fact that they both sounded muffled and ridiculous with their busted noses. “I should have known better after you got jumped like that.”

Danielle shrugged, shifting back into the uncomfortable chairs they’d been parked in outside the dean’s office. The teachers on site were going over the situation with him as they had seen it, and from what Jon could hear were reviewing the CCTV footage from the cafeteria cameras. Trip’s family wasn’t prestigious or wealthy enough for the faculty to put aside their ethics and take his side, so their honest thoughts about the bully getting what he deserved - however annoying it was that they were going to have to deal with it all - shared freely from the perceived privacy of the office. Elle would still get punished for going as far as she did, but at least it wouldn’t be as bad as it could be for her.

“Assholes will be assholes.” She said, toying with the tie of her uniform. She’d ripped it off just as the fight had started, in a brief moment between kicking Trip back into his goons and them recovering enough to jump at her again. She had wrapped it around the knuckles of her dominant hand in a fast loop, giving her a little more protection before she then drove her padded fist right into the gut of Jordan Stone. She had followed it up by grabbing Jordan’s own tie and using it to get enough leverage on him to send him flying into Erin Dorner.

It was the kind of quick-thinking adjustment that Jon associated with D. Removing a potential liability, making it an advantage, latching on to any and all weakness in the opposition and using it against them. He wasn’t an expert in hand-to-hand combat the way Damian was - he could hold his own and knew how to fight with his fists as well as his powers, but there was a big difference between his skill and D’s - but he knew enough to be able to tell that Danielle wasn’t formerly trained. She was fast and quick and clever, but everything she did spoke of scrabbling street fighting brawls and learning from painful experience.

Something else to add to the seemingly endless list of things that were weird about Danielle Masters.

Because why would the daughter of one of the richest men in the country know how to scrap like a street fighter? Most rich kids didn’t really know how to fight at all, or if they did it was self-defense lessons taught by the best martial artists in the world. Maybe it was because of her meta powers? A fear of it getting out if she was taught to fight and ended up destroying a training dummy right with a single hit? But then how did she know to fight at all?

He teased Damian for going all Bernard Dowd on him for the oversized corkboard with all the notes and pictures and red thread, but Jon got it. Every new insight into the enigma that was Danielle Masters only ever led to a thousand more questions. A mystery only ever made murkier the more was known, instead of less.

—

Danielle - Elle, she’d told him to call her, a little fierce, even as her eyes were sad - hadn’t been afraid during the fight with Trip and his cronies.

Or if she had, her heart rate had never indicated it. It had risen during the fight sure, but it had been the steady quickening of a body exercising. No jackrabbit quickness, just an even increase in rate to account for her quick movements and hard hits. She hadn’t even really broken a sweat. She’d been steady the entire time, from the first sucker punch she’d taken to the face to the last she’d thrown herself at Jon.

She was scared now.

Dr. Penelope Spektor stood over the girl, usual bright, smiling face set in an unreadable mask as she stared down at Elle. Beneath the lighting of the waiting room outside the Dean’s office in her smart red suit and her glasses pushed up atop her head to rest against her bright red hair she looked almost like the devil. Jon wasn’t sure why that thought came to him. The school counselor had only ever been kind to him during the few times they’d spoken about his scholarship at Gotham Academy and his options for colleges. Maybe it was the intensity of her green eyes, the way they almost seemed to glow as they bore into Elle.

Maybe it was the way that Elle’s heartbeat had ticked up and started hammering in her chest the moment Dr. Spektor’s sharp heels were heard clicking down the hall towards them. The way she shrunk into herself as the woman moved to stand before her, above her, not saying a word. The way Elle looked like she wanted to fling herself from the chair and run as far and fast away from the woman as she could.

“I didn’t start-“ Elle’s voice was reedy, unsteady with fear and anxiety.

“Silence.”

Jon felt cold.

Elle snapped her mouth shut with a painful, jarring clack. Fast enough and hard enough to be painful. He thought he could hear one of her back molars crack from the force. He definitely heard her heart rate pick up even faster in her chest. So quick he was afraid it might just give out on her entirely. He saw the faint tremble of her hands as she wrapped them around herself, fingers digging into the fabric of her blazer with a kind of desperate hold as she clung to her own arms.

“I’ve called to inform your father of this incident.” There was a slithering, dark disgust in the words. A viciousness lacing through her icy tone. “Three days suspension. You will be spending that time with me.”

Elle looked like she might be sick at that, face draining of all color a the judgement the counselor had just given. She didn’t try to speak, to respond, just gave a stiff nod and bowed her head. Her eyes were wide as she stared down at the floor, too much white exposed. Blood dripped down from her nose again, the thundering of her pulse breaking through the clotting and making bright red drip down her face.

Dr. Spektor’s gaze slid over to where Jon sat, frozen in place by the strange scene before him. In a blink her face smoothed out, back into the pleasant, welcoming smile she always wore whenever speaking to a student. “Oh my, Mr. Kent I had heard you got injured while trying to break that horrible ruckus up earlier.” She tisked lightly, and Elle flinched a little at the sound. “I’m so sorry about that, Danielle has a bad habit of getting into trouble and I hate to see that she’s gotten you involved in her mess this time.”

Jon, for reasons he couldn’t comprehend, felt oddly at ease at her words. As strange as the feeling of being frozen in place that had overtaken him as he watched the tense scene between the school counselor and Elle. A slow, honey-thick feeling of calm, laced through with understanding and acceptance.

“It’s okay.” He said, throat feeling tight around the words. It wasn’t alright, he wanted to get to his feet, to put himself between Elle and Spektor. Wanted to drag the girl away somewhere safe and try and make her feel better, try and figure out just what was going on and why she was so afraid of the red-headed woman.

It was alright, though. He could feel it, settling into his chest, relaxing his shoulders, soothing away the tense anxiety. It was a little odd, but he just didn’t have the context of it all probably. Nothing to worry about, nothing to think about.

Elle was still hunched over, shoulder’s tight, eyes now squeazed tight. Her grip on her arms like a vice, squeezing with enough force she had to be bruising beneath the layers of her school uniform. Her heart rate a roaring drum in her chest, heart slamming painfully against the cage of her ribs, afraid, terrified.

“The fight wasn’t her fault Dr. Spektor.” He said, the words feeling like burning tar against his tongue, even though he knew the truth of them. “Trip and the other two attacked her first when she was trying to get them to leave the person they were bullying alone. She was just defending herself.”

Dr. Spektor’s lips twitched, just a little. Her expression held on her normal warm smile but something curled at the edges of her smile, the corners of her bright green eyes. Dark and deep, sharp as shattered glass and viciously, sickeningly pleased. She pulled her glasses off her head and set them back in place on her nose and the glimpse of that hungry thing beneath was gone.

Never there at all. A trick of the light. Too much time seeing the worst of humanity as Superboy and mistakenly thinking he saw it in the pleasant, kind face of the school’s counselor. Nothing to worry about at all. It was fine. He felt fine about all of it.

Elle was crying now.

He felt sick.

“Well, that is good to know.” Dr. Spektor said, voice honey sweet and lulling. “But I would hate for Danielle to fall into those old, nasty habits of hers. Better to make sure she understands that violence is never the answer.” She stepped over to him, leaning over to settle concerned eyes upon him and a gentle hand on his shoulder, surprisingly cool even through the weight of his blazer and the layers beneath. “Again I am so sorry you got hurt, Mr. Kent. I do hope Danielle can make it up to you later. She could use a good influence like you in her life.”

The sick feeling in his gut grew worse, even as his body was flooded with a sense of blissful contentment and unquestioning understanding of the situation. The vague idea that had been bubbling in him since the start of the school year to reach out to the girl in question solidified into a determined certainty that he would do just that the first chance he got. A flame flourishing at the gentle encouragement of a fan.

Just behind the school counselor Elle was terrified out of her mind.

Elle was just a little upset that she got in trouble, she’d be fine.

Dr. Spektor was treating Elle with a barely contained cruelty, venomous and wrathful.

Dr. Spektor was treating Elle normally, disappointed that she resorted to violence.

It was all wrong.

It was all perfectly fine.

The counselor stood up straight, gave him one last pat on the shoulder and a smile before turning towards the door of the Dean’s office. Her smile slipped for just a moment, face back in that disdainful blankness as she plucked invisible lint from her suit jacket. Not even looking at Elle as she gave a short, “Go to the car. Wait there. No detours. No calls. Speak to no one.”

Elle lurched into motion, getting to her feet with a mechanical kind of stiffness. She didn’t run down the hall but her awkward, robotic gate was nearly at that speed as she almost threw herself down the hall towards the side entrance where the staff parking lot was.

Dr. Spektor’s smile returned. Professional. Polite. The person everyone in school knew they could reach out to and trust if there was anything wrong, if they needed help. Guiding the students with a gentle hand, bolstering the faculty with her bright positivity. She knocked on the door and entered upon invitation with her familiar cheer.

Something was deeply, truly wrong with everything going on here.

Everything was perfectly normal.

D found him ten minutes later, dry heaving in the boys’ bathroom.

He couldn’t remember why he was there.

Everything was fine.

[babushkatty]

Tranquil SAGAU - Part 3

-> Part 1

-> Part 2

-> Part 4

Turns out, you did jinx yourself last week.

You should have learnt your lesson from all those times you and your sister had spoken bad luck into existence, be it unannounced guests or other inconveniences.

But you didn't, so here you were.

Staring down motherfucking Ursa the Drake, with Dvalin pinning them (her?) down with his massive body and motherfucking Crepus Ragnvindr looking at you both simultaneously like it's Christmas and like he thinks he's schizophrenic.

Diluc didn't look any better. He was as white as a sheet and if you were any better at identifying emotions, you'd think he was about to cry.

...surely not?

But then again, he was younger than in the game and his father was right there, alive and well - you doubted he was anything like the cold and grumpy Diluc who closed himself off from the world that you knew.

A terrified baby that was probably overthinking how Ursa would kill him, his father and the whole cohort they traveled with all the way to Tuesday.

...now you just felt bad for judging. You wouldn't be any better in his place, especially without your scary Dvalin priviledges.

"Ursa, darling, what exactly are you doing?"

All you got for your troubles was a roar in your face.

Except it didn't even feel like a scary dragon about to eat you, it felt like a child throwing a tantrum.

...the notion of Ursa being this uncontested and plaguing Mondstadt for a thousand years while being a mere child was kind of terrifying actually, so you very deliberately decided not to dwell on it. For your own sanity, if nothing else.

"Dvalin, you know Ursa, so... Any ideas?" You asked the dragon, who looked almost bored as he outright lounged on Ursa as if they (she?) were his beddings. If that didn't make a statement, you didn't know what would.

"While we did not cross paths frequently in the past, I had always thought her to be... Especially nefarious."

Ursa trashed around, but Dvalin didn't budge and effortlessly kept them (her? her.) pinned down.

"She reminds me of Durin. But where Durin was oblivious to the grevious harm he caused and merely wanted to play, Ursa is fully conscious and reveling in the pain she inflicts on others, often being open to agreements that involve human sacrifice."

Ursa screeched. In protest, maybe?

"For now, there is not much that can be done. You would need to be much stronger to subdue her permamently, which requires time. But I shall stall her until you are strong enough, alongside Boreas."

Oh.

So your scary Dvalin priviledges were being voided. It was a shame, you really liked his company -- his stories were a delight to listen to and he spoiled you rotten for comfortable accomodations, any bed or chair from now on would be a massive downgrade.

Still, it was understandable. Responsibilities and human lives were priority over your comfort. You weren't going to complain too much.

"I'll miss you," you say as you stroke his wings, not really having access to his torso or head to hug him properly due to Ursa.

Speaking of Ursa...

"Be good. You're making trouble for everyone."

And maybe you were being reckless and simply asking for your arm and face to be bitten off, but you flicked her on the snoot, because you only live once and Dvalin had you mildly convinced nothing in Teyvat would hurt you.

Ursa startles and then, honest to God, whines.

Dvalin huffs in what you assume is amusement and grabs at Ursa with his massive limbs. His wings stretch as he readies himself to take flight.

"I will miss you too, (Name)."

And just like that both dragons are gone like the wind.

...

That left you all alone to face the Ragnvindr and C.O., so you put on your customer service smile and clap your hands in fake excitement you really don't feel.

If nothing else, working in retail taught you how to play the fool.

"So, now that that is done and over with. I believe you have a mess to clean up?"

Crepus looks at you like you grew an extra head, before doubling over in a hearty laugh that broke through the weird atmosphere that settled over the caravan as easily as a hot knife through butter.

Diluc still looks like a poke would knock him over, but at least he got some colour back in him.

"Ah, thank you for that."

Crepus walks over to you and offers you a handshake, gripping your hand firmly and with enthusiasm that was entirely on him. Not that you weren't excited to meet characters from Genshin... but that was the thing, wasn't it? They weren't the characters you knew in Genshin. Crepus was barely a mention, Diluc was a different person entirely and the rest of the caravan were either NPCs hanging around on the map somewhere or didn't exist in the game at all.

So, you had to treat them like actual people.

And you weren't good with people.

"No problem. I'm (Name) (Last Name), just call me (Name) please."

Smile through the pain Harold, grant me your strength.

"Crepus Ragnvindr, and the redhead over there is my son, Diluc. It's a pleasure to meet you, (Name)."

He lets go of your hand and smiles so brightly you half-heartedly wished for some sunglasses. Was this man sunshine personified? Certaintly felt like he was.

"I would say I wish we met under different circumstances, but that's not exactly the truth, is it? Any other circumstances would have me trying to fight Ursa the Drake and that was bound to end badly for me, so... Thank you for saving my life."

And at that precise moment the Knights of Favonius spurred on by Kaeya Alberich himself burst into the scene, weapons ready.

...Kaeya looked like such a baby too, it had you thinking on just how young the literal children like Diona would be.

☆(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ* ✨ Author Note✨

Suprise, we're 4 years early in the timeline! And I have no idea what the timeline is besides what little I glimpsed from the Wiki, so lore accuracy is thrown out the window!

✨ I still can't tag the one person that asked to be tagged and I'm feeling horrible for it even when it's not my fault ✨

Also, yes, ✨ is my favourite emoji, why do you ask? :D

Also, also -- yes, I did pump out 3 parts in 2/3 days, it is an anomaly, do not expect such pace from me especially since I'm about to throw myself head first into HSR.

✨Self-plug time✨

My UID is 715 837 832 and I got a lvl50 Bronya as support.

I am still on Walt copium, even though I didn't get him even once despite the many, MANY rerolls I did, but that is neither here nor there.

[justporo]

Astarion scenario/headcanon idea, how do you think he'd feel if he were to find out, after the fact, that he was Tavs first? can be a 'hey so, forgot to mention something...' or can be a slip of the tongue of a Tav who was maybe worried he'd think them too immature if he knew they were inexperienced

Firstly, let me apologise for letting this sit in my inbox for soooo long - I know it's been forever but I hope you will still like it.

So Astarion finds about that your first night together was your first...

Quite honestly Astarion might figure that out quite quickly, maybe not that it was really their fist time but certainly that Tav's rather inexperienced

Depending on when he finds that out and if he already has an inkling about that he's developing a whole lot of feelings for Tav, guilt would definitely kick in

Early on I guess he'd brush it off rather quickly, definitely not the first time that's happened

But let's assume it's later on and he already slowly realises that you're more to him than just a target for manipulation and a fling

Guilt - that's what's happening but then again he can't and he won't stop his advances - either because he's still very much dependent on Tav for his own survival or becase he's already head over heels (or an even more powerful mixture of both...)

He'll try and find some kind of awkward way too show Tav that it's not a bad thing

Although he might not yet be at a point where he can actually talk about this and the shame he feels because of that, he starts to make especially conscious efforts to take it slower with Tav

He double-checks with Tav what things are okay

And maybe through this it causes him to also be more conscious about what he himself is feeling, how his actions impact his own well-being and pleasure in the moment

Somehow it may become a lot of exploration for Astarion too because when was the last time he was actively thinking about these things?

At some point the topic will be definitely brought up for discussion, that's when Tav can reassure him that there was no need to feel guilty to begin with as much as Astarion reassured his partner that there was nothing to be ashamed of

That being said when you're more comfortable with all this (and maybe after some messes have been dealt with so you're both more free to explore), he'd definitely tease you to explore even further: what turns you on, what are definite no-gos

Astarion's eager to please and eager to teach and thus maybe learning a thing or two about himself too

[stormgardenscurse]

made for you - puppet au

Summary: In a steampunk-esque setting, your guardian-slash-mentor left you with one thing after their passing—a self-autonomous puppet that was designed to blend in with humans, who would protect and accompany you in your mentor’s absence.

Characters: Floyd, Ace, Cater, Lilia

Warnings: mentions of blood in Lilia's!

Floyd

Outsiders might complain about Floyd’s flippant change in moods, saying that you seemed to be the only person he doesn’t get annoyed with.

In two ways this judgment was flawed: they didn’t know he was a puppet (and so thought he was merely a scary traveling partner of yours), and he does get mad at you sometimes. Namely when you do things for others that he thinks are unnecessary, because why do you have to be the nice one and try to maintain relations with people you weren’t even close with? 

Floyd never got why you stress yourself out with things like that—and if you told him to help you with such tasks? Expect him to either turn to a game of cat and mouse (behind your back, he’s the cat and some other person is the mouse) or fulfill it with a dangerous gleam in his eyes when a stranger sees him, saying ‘don’t approach me, I’m really not in the mood’.

He rarely directs his frustration at you, though. Call it part of his design or whatever, but for the most part he’s more lax around you, slinging his arm over your shoulder or asking if you wanted to do (insert unhinged scheme) with a casual tone.

You worry about the people that he does get into fights with. Floyd doesn’t pay much attention to his inhuman strength and things can get awkward when people question it—leaving you to stand there, contemplating if you should reveal the truth.

But… while Floyd doesn’t really care for the distinction between being human and not (as long as you treat him as equals), he finds it fun when people think he’s just an unpredictable human. The looks on their faces and struggle when he tests their limits are always a sight to behold. 

Humans really are quite amusing—but of course, you’re his favorite one.

Ace

Ace has an inner conflict, one could say.

As charismatic as he can be (and by god was he a convincing actor), Ace would always, at the back of his mind, be conscious of the fact that he wasn’t human.

Nevermind the fact he’s probably more humane than some people out there, but he always has the feeling that it wasn’t enough. There’s a type of jealousy that crops up whenever he sees you interacting with people—he’s not sure if he’s jealous of the way you are, with your quirks and emotions that he idealizes despite how he claims otherwise, or if he’s jealous of the others around you.

He’d never fall sick or actually feel physical pain. He could be repaired so long as his core was salvageable, and so Ace could never be your friend in the way he might want to be. He wonders, sometimes, that in an alternate world—if he was human, would you look towards him the same way you do now? Would you still pick him within an ocean of so many, if he wasn’t a puppet crafted by your mentor?

Instead of expressing this, Ace of course directs these feelings into a personality that’s a little bratty. He’d challenge your requests at times, asking if it was an ‘order’ and only complying if you pushed back.

You’ll hear a lilt in his voice when he calls you ‘Master’ mockingly. For the most part Ace’s mean streak isn’t that bad though—he does show concern for you and is essentially a best friend that keeps you grounded. Sometimes you wonder if he actually liked being bossed around, thinking of it as a way to acknowledge the odd relationship you had. 

You don’t see him as a servant or object, but perhaps he finds some comfort in the idea that he was made for you. That way, your attachments to one-another was completely normal—you’d always pick him, right?

Cater

Cater is a puppet that lets you know his world revolves around you, if only to see the adorable expressions you make in response.

He doesn’t care for his own maintenance that much, nor about hurting himself in your defense or while doing tasks. Cater’s good at masking such things too, with long-sleeved or layered clothing to hide his mechanical injuries away. He says it’s unsightly and he’ll just fix it himself later, but you always recognise when he’s lying about how it’s ‘not that bad’. 

It makes an odd feeling ache in his chest whenever you do that, making him sit down in the privacy of your inn room so you could patch him up. There’s an unreadable look in his gaze at times like those, asking you if you saw him as someone that could actually get hurt. You said yes. Cater makes sure to remember that. 

He’s flirty most of the time, acting good-natured with others but obviously trying to charm you in particular. People tend to think you’re a couple because of that, and is it so bad if Cater kind of likes the sound of it?

He enjoys how genuine of a person you are—sure, everyone has their own thoughts and darker side that they keep to themselves, but he’s never detected falsehoods in your emotions towards him. Maybe it helps that you know he’s a puppet—why would you feel the need to guard yourself from him the same way as others? 

He likes this exclusivity he has to the different sides of you, especially since he’s a key link to your past. It’s also easier to focus his time and energy on someone else than the gloom that sometimes spreads in his system, which was surely just another mechanical flaw.

"I'm just supposed to make sure you're happy, Master~ So don’t worry about it!"

Lilia

No one would suspect that your cute companion would have a rather… uncompromising side, with it came to getting rid of nuisances that threatened your safety.

In his defense, he was kind of built to be a deadly weapon—the world is a dangerous place after all, and Lilia doesn’t mind being the one that protects you from those that may do you harm. Your mentor dabbled in areas that garnered them enemies, thus the association and knowledge you possessed was a dangerous light to greedy moths.

You never actually witness how he is in combat, though. Lilia always returns from his missions quietly, wiping the scratches and blood off of his synthetic skin. He greets you with a smile if you’re still awake at that point in the night, and you’re none-the-wiser about the expressions he can make when he gets serious on the field.

It’s night and day, the difference between how he is there versus how he is when mingling with people or with you. Lilia likes how you rely on him during your travels. He has a backlog of historical knowledge that he collected shortly after he was crafted, but nothing compares to actually being in different nations and seeing things with your own two eyes. 

He enjoys calling your name in a familiar tone and hearing you do the same. Lilia hopes to be a presence that reminds you of home, so it’s only natural that he cherishes the lighthearted and heart-to-heart conversations you have. 

Leave the bodyguard work to him; there’s a reason your mentor made a puppet for this purpose, after all. And honestly, Lilia’s quite happy with the way his life was right now. It was much richer than the endless clockwork of a workshop, and pretty things that did nothing compared to your warm words and sparkle in your eyes that was so undeniably human.

[whetstonefires]

Hey you said something about the my hero academia creator being unhinged about sexism, do you mind explaining?

I tried to write like, a thorough explanation of this and it just got longer and longer and longer and I have not touched this series in actual years and yet I've still got all these receipts a;lkjk;lfasd.

So rather than trying to build the whole massive case, here's a pared-down version. It's normal to have sexism in media, and shounen manga especially. Everyone does it. The level and mode and intentionality and so forth all vary, but of course it's there.

What's not normal is to have lots of varied and interesting female characters with discernible inner lives, and on-page discussion of how sexism is systemic and unjust and holds them back in specific ways, and then also deliberately make consistent sexist writing decisions even where they don't arise naturally from the flow of the narrative.

Horikoshi is actively interested in gender and sexism, he's aware of them in a way you rarely see outside of the context of, you know, fighting sexism. He is hung up on the thorny issue of what women are worth and deserve and how power and respect ties into it. He genuinely wants, I think, to have Good Female Characters, and not be (seen as) A Sexist Guy!

But. He doesn't actually want to fight sexism. He displays a lot of woman-oriented anxieties, and one of the many churning paddlewheels in his head seems to be that he knows intellectually that morally sexism is bad, but emotionally he really feels like it ought to probably be at least partly correct.

There are so many things I could cite, and maybe I'll get into some of them later, but the crowning item that highlights how the pattern is 1) at least partly conscious and deliberate and 2) about Horikoshi's own weird hangups rather than simply cynical market play, is Mineta Minoru.

The writer has stated Mineta is his favorite character. Mineta is also designed to be hated--that is, he is a particularly elaborate instantiation of a character archetype normally deployed to soak up audience contempt and (by being gross and shameless and unattractive and 'unthreatening') make it possible to include a range of sexual gratification elements into the narrative that would compromise the main characters' reputations as heroic and deserving, if they were the actors.

Good Guys don't grope girls' tits and run away snickering in triumph, after all. Non-losers don't focus intense effort around successfully stealing someone's panties. Nice Girls don't let themselves be seen half-dressed. And so forth. You need an underwear gremlin for that. So, in anime and manga, longstanding though declining tradition of including such a gremlin, for authorial deniability.

Horikoshi definitely uses him straight for this purpose, looping in Kaminari as needed to make a bit work. And yet he has Feelings about the archetype itself.

The passages dedicated to the vindication of Mineta, then, and the author's statements about him, let us understand that Horikoshi identifies with the figure of the underwear gremlin. He understands the underwear gremlin as a defining exemplar of male sexuality, at least if you are not hot, and finds the attached contempt and hostility to be a dehumanizing attack on all uh.

Incels, basically.

It's not fair to write Mineta off just because he's unattractive and horny (and commits sexual harassment). Doesn't he have a mind? Doesn't he have dreams? Doesn't he have human potential?

So what's going on with Horikoshi and gender, as far as I can figure out, is that he knows damn well that women are people and are treated unjustly by sexist society, but however.

He also understands the institutions of sexism as something protecting him and people like him from life being nebulously yet definitively Worse, and therefore wants to see them upheld.

So you get this really bizarre handling of gender where obviously women's rights good and women cool, women can be Strong, and the compulsory sexualization imposed by the industry isn't them or the author, and so forth.

But also it's very important that in the world he controls, women never win anything important or Count too much, and that jokes at their expense that disrupt the internal logic of their characters are always fair game, that women asked about sexism on TV will promptly get into catfights amongst themselves, and they are understood always in terms of their sexual and romantic interests and value, and sexual assertiveness and failures to perform femininity well enough are used to code them as dangerous and irrational, and that the sexy costumes are requisite and will never be subverted or rebelled against--at most they might be circumnavigated via leaning into cute appeal.

And that Yaoyorozu Momo, who converts her body fat into physical objects, is being frivolous when she wants to use money to buy things instead (rather than as sensibly moderating her Quirk use) and is never encouraged to eat as much as possible at every opportunity to put on weight and even shown being embarrassed by hunger (even though Quirk overuse gives symptoms that suggest she's been stripping the lipids out of her cell walls or nervous system to keep fighting) and always, no matter how many Things she has made, has huge big round boobies.

[vinsmokc-sanji]

“I can teach you if you’d like”.

Pairing: OPLA Sanji x Reader

Summary: Sanji finds out you've never been kissed and he's a very eager teacher;

Word count: 1.6K;

Rating/Content Warnings: PG-13; AFAB reader, cigarettes, alcohol consumption;

Author's note: Ok, so... this might turn into a series with Y/N asking Sanji to teach her his ways. I'll see how I'll feel about it, but please: give me your feedback!

“I cannot believe that, Y/N!” said Sanji in a mocking tone, while ducking a punch that would’ve hit him square in the jaw if you two weren’t sharing a bottle of wine while on the crow’s nest as that was the only place that seemed to be away from Zeff’s eyes and gave the both of you at least a little sense of . “I cannot believe you’ve never kissed anyone!”.

“Shut up, you jerk! Not everyone is a whore like you” you replied through gritted teeth. Being the only girl at the Baratie, you dealt with more than your fair share of thirsty boys (and men), so no, you never had that sort of interaction before as overall the amount of attention you normally get was off putting. But of course, that’s what happened when Zeff wasn’t around; if he even though one of the guys was crossing a line, he wouldn’t hesitate to kick someone off the boat in a heartbeat. That little nugget of information about yourself was something that you’d never voluntarily tell, especially to Sanji, but the little wine you had before made your tongue looser than normal.

“And not everyone is a prude like you” the blond replied with shrugged shoulders; unlike you, Sanji tried his way with literally every single female humanoid he laid his eyes upon.

You frowned. “I’m not a prude, I just… got overwhelmed by you guys annoying me all the time. And now I’m too self-conscious of being bad at it, or awkward, or gross, or something like that, so I guess I’ll just never do it and die an old maid” you said dramatically, sliding down the wall in the way only a dramatic woman in her early twenties could. Sanji snorted and sat down by your side while precariously holding the bottle in one hand and placed his free hand on the top of your head. “C’mon Y/N. I’m giving you a hard time but it’s not that big of a deal”.

You rolled your eyes and shook your head, forcing Sanji to remove his hand; “Yeah, sure, it isn’t. Guys don’t even want to sleep with a girl if she’s a virgin as they don’t want responsibility, let alone deal with someone like me. No one wants to deal with this sort of baggage… and it’s fine, really. It doesn’t bother me”.

It was very clear that it did, in fact, bother you.

“I can teach you if you’d like”.

Sanji took a deep breath; the fact that he had a major crush wasn’t a secret to anyone at the restaurant and the wine you had shared was making him a bit bolder than usual.

Of course, he flirted with you every chance he had; but Sanji was highly aware of the line he couldn’t cross and that you mostly saw it as playful banter instead of actual flirting. Both of you had your dreams; you wanted to take over the Baratie when Zeff decided to retire, Sanji still nurtured his wishes for the All Blue and neither of you were going to allow anything to get in the way and you were so focused on your  own goals that you were constantly pushing yourself too hard to the point of exhaustion and getting an earful from Zeff after a handful of particularly hard episodes.

The blond had a shaking smile on his lips; enough to claim he was joking if you were offended, but your big doe eyes looked up at him in an unexpectedly eager way. “Really? You wouldn’t mind?” you asked, clinging on his sleeve as you shifted your position, now kneeling on the ground and staring at Sanji; “Please?”

Sanji felt his heart stop for a second, as he’d never imagined this situation: you, on your knees, asking for him to touch you. As much as he wanted this, he didn’t feel like that would be the best option given that you were both slightly drunk (and the romantic in him didn’t want your first kiss to be a sloppy drunk make out). Sanji knew that the jerk side of him would be kicking himself in the morning, but he just couldn’t do it.

“Sorry kitten, no way. I guess that’s the wine talking… talk to me in the morning and let me know if you’re still up for it, ok? For now, I think it’s best if we went to our individual beds, by ourselves”.

You were now pouting and whining, but still managed to get yourself up from the floor and leave back to your room, still pouting and dragging your feet. Sanji stayed out there for a little longer, trying his hardest not to chase after you, smoking one cigarette after the other.

***

The next morning, Sanji was a bit afraid of how things would go with you — he guessed you’d be embarrassed and avoid him, but you were just your regular self: sassy, animated, cheeky and efficient in the kitchen. Even though his mind kept going back to the crow’s nest situation, Sanji managed to keep his cool and muffle his frustration. As much as he hated to admit, he wanted you to remember last night. He wanted you to, again, beg and pout and whine wanting his lips on yours.

But he still thought that turning you down was the best option for both of you.

The Baratie had a regular day — as regular as a day in the Baratie can be. Sanji kept a close eye on you, but it was like last night had never happened. He tried not to let the bitterness get to him, but he was a little disappointed and upset; as soon as he could, Sanji escaped from the kitchen and climbed to the crow’s nest by himself so he could light up another cigarette and overthink.

Sanji was so lost in thought he didn’t hear you creeping from behind him and almost dropped his cigarette when he felt you tapping his shoulder. You couldn’t help but laugh softly at his over reaction, ignoring the indignant look Sanji was shooting at you. “What? What is it that you want, Y/N, that’s so important for you to nearly kill me?” Sanji had absolutely no bark behind his words, and you knew that.

“Is your proposal still on?”

Again, his heart stopped; he couldn’t feel his hands shaking slightly, and his whole face felt like it was burning. “Wha-what proposal?” Sanji asked, hoping to gain time and composure. “Don’t play with me, little eggplant. You know what I’m talking about” your pink ears and the fact that you were not able to keep eye contact assured Sanji that you were being serious.

“You mean it?”

“I mean… yeah. I came out here looking for you, didn’t I? It’s better if it's with you and not some random guy…” You looked embarrassed, avoiding Sanji’s gaze and fidgeting with your fingers; Sanji couldn’t help but feel his heart swelling by how endearing you looked right now. Without even realizing what he was doing, Sanji tossed his cigarette to the side and closed the distance between the both of you, grabbing your face with both of his hands and forcing you to look up to him. “Then I need you to look me in the eyes and tell me you really want it, Y/N”.

“Please, Sanji… Kiss me?”

Sanji hesitated for a split second before lowering his lips to meet yours; he could feel your trembling breath fanning his face, count every single eyelash that adorned your eyes and he could feel your perfume in such a way that he felt like he was drunk all over again — vanilla, almost like he was inside of a bakery.

When your lips touched, Sanji felt himself melting and he felt dizzy; his head was spinning and his stomach was exploding with butterflies, his heart felt like it was going to burst out of his chest and his fingertips were trembling on your cheeks. You were hesitant, taking you a few seconds before shyly embracing Sanji’s neck with your arms, pulling him closer.

Instinctively Sanji’s hand made their way to your waist, feeling the warmth of your skin under the thin blouse you were wearing. He had to make a conscious effort to not cross any boundaries as he didn’t want to scare you or cross a line, but it was hard to keep himself grounded when he started hearing the little content noises that were coming out from the back of your throat.

When you feel Sanji’s tongue touching your lips, your knees stop functioning for a moment and Sanji has to hold you tight so you won’t fall. His confidence and cockyness kicked in, and Sanji quickly had you pressed against the half-wall of the crow’s nest, his hands now seemingly all over you: your neck, your hair, your face, your waist; your head was spinning and now you had your hands tangled into Sanji’s hair, you could taste the cigarette he was having and that mixed with the expensive cologne he always wore made you feel like you were having a fever dream. You could feel yourself getting hotter by the second, and it felt like Sanji weren’t close enough to you.

Reluctantly, Sanji holds your face with both his hands and pulls away; he needs to take a deep breath and regain his composure. You whine, trying to pull him back so you can kiss him again, but Sanji merely kisses your forehead and brings you into a hug, tucking your head under his chin.

“There you go, princess. That was your first lesson”.

[sminiac]

do u think u could do what morning cuddles would be like with piwon?? thank uu!!

💌 — MORNING CUDDLES IM GOING TO EXPLODE INTO TINY ITTY BITTY PIECES

— SFW!

⋆ Y. Keeho

With sleep still lingering heavy on his eyelids Keeho becomes incredibly clingy, and to an extent he can be quite sensitive as well. Asks of you to “Please don’t be mean to me” when you’re trying to source any viable excuse to get you out of the devastatingly comfy bed and into the kitchen so you don’t over sleep, he just takes it very personally, but it’s hard to deny him the comfort of your body moulded into his when he’s unintentionally being so soft and cute about it. He either struggles with waking up so bad and will drag the process of your soft kisses and coaxing words out for as long as he can, or he just lays at your side, smiling to himself as he traces your features with the tips of his fingers.

Remainder of members under the cut!

⋆ C. Taeyang

Not the whiniest, surprisingly. All he asks of is for back scratches and some love, that’s all he needs. Oh! But also maybe a cup of water if you’re getting up since it’s on your way, maybe a little snack too? It’s hard to deny him, sometimes he tugs on just the right strings and you’ll come back with breakfast prepared and ready to eat. He likes morning like this, watching tv, catching up on each others lives, the warm glow of the sun keeping you warm even when you’re sitting up and out of the nest of blankets. He catches glimpses of a secure future spent with you doing exactly the same thing, only the two of you will be older, and free from worry. Sometimes he’ll think about it for a little too long and his throat will start to tighten, he swears he doesn’t mean to get emotional, you’re just the one of the closest feeling to home he has, and he’s just so grateful you’re sticking around. Leans his head onto your shoulder when he’s finished eating, silently kissing your hand.

⋆ C. Jiung

Draws shapes and secret words against your back that you can’t focus on when he talks with his morning voice. Getting him to continue talking doesn’t talk much effort, and he doesn’t fight it knowing how tired you are struggling not to fall back asleep. Talking about his music and any upcoming projects really gets him going, sometimes he talks in circles, and then laughs to himself whilst kissing your head, apologizing for not making any sense. When he’s not talking he’s singing, it’s not a conscious decision, it just slips, and he doesn’t try to sound good he just does, there’s something so perfect about the tenderness to his tone and how he sings for only your ears, you’re always the first to hear his new demos and experiments.

⋆ H. Intak

Even when he’s less than half awake he still seems so conscious. Will pull you into him if you’re a little too far, adjusts your arms so he can get a better hold on you, tucking you under his chin nice and comfy so he can go right back to sleep. You can never tell if he’s actually knocked out or if he’s just laying there with his eyes closed, but he always answers to the small curious pokes to his chest with a raspy “hm?” But that’s all you’ll get, so don’t expect much more. When Intak’s got you in his bed he’s a complete log, stays stuck to you all night and throughout most of the morning. After he’s fully awake then he enjoys small morning overviews of the previous day if you weren’t with him, and what you want to do today. He’ll do anything to keep you talking, to him there’s nothing better than a cozy morning in his bed accompanied by his lover who sounds so pretty when he makes you laugh.

⋆ H. Shota

The easiest to deal with, an absolute angel. Shota’s so content with anything you have to offer, he doesn’t mind if you get up 29272 times, as long as you come back to him he doesn’t mind at all ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა‎ accommodates to your morning routine as much as he can during the weekdays, but when it comes to free days when the two of you have nothing to do, no one to see, then he’ll ask of you to just stay in bed with him for as long as possible. Holds you if your body temp typically runs on the chillier side, or keeps an adequate amount of space between the two of you if you become hot quickly. He doesn’t say much when he’s tired, only small sounds and nods, but when he’s more awake he’s a little more talkative, not by a lot, but he enjoys playing with your hair while talking about a recent interest of his that you just have to know about too!

⋆ K. Jongseob

Mornings with Seob are always very quiet and easy- at least that’s how he tries to make them, his day-to-day schedule varies, but somehow he still manages to cut through any unexpected changes to sustain the tranquil nature of his room for even just a few more minutes spent with you in his arms. Not necessarily a possessive person in general, he can live with his members being physically affectionate with you, but when it’s early in the morning and the suns just barely creeping through the window all he wants is you, and all to himself at that. Asks where you’re going if you’re shifting in any way that indicates to him that you’re getting up, if he can come, why you’re going. Immediately settles once you’re back in bed and he can nuzzle into you.

ᰔ sminiac’s P1Harmony M.list