#they’re both still cis

[thattheater-kid]

Charlie: Where are you going?

Alastor: I’m going out with Rosie, Mimzy, and Niffty.

Charlie: Ooh, can I come?

Alastor: No, it’s girls night.

Charlie: ???????

[autism-crime]

Y’all ever see a fic where the author has written Vash as trans masc but Knives as cis? Cos it makes me-

They’re identical twins? They have the same DNA?

(Honestly a few times I’ve read a fic with them as AMAB and got confused because my stupid ass forgot)

[karlyboyyy]

I need you all to know that Heaven Official’s Blessing Vol 6 destroyed me.

✨Mild Spoilers✨

Like… we finally got Xie Lian and Hua Cheng to admit to each other that yep, it’s mutual! Woo! But then…

Then we’re confronted with a ~300 page flashback to the most terrifyingly heartbreaking and traumatizing time in Xie Lian’s past and I just… ugghhhh 😭

He was so very close to completely giving in to the agony and hate. And I felt that.

But by the end, he still manages to see a sliver of hope in the world and decides to pick himself back up and continue to save people as best he could.

Xie Lian is a certified Cinnamon Roll and a badass, and I can honestly say he’s one of my favorite fictional characters of all time.

Side note: Do we ever find out what that last mural depicts?? Did Hua Cheng paint something that was just so lovey dovey it was cringey? Or did he go all out and paint some straight up filthy nasty sex? Either way would honestly be hilarious but I’ve gotta know 😐

[emry-stars-art]

When the misunderstanding is mutual but they’re both so sweet about it (coffee shop au edition)

Inspired by the tags below (originally on this post) from @blahblaheverythingisgay and @lovelyprincejehan accompanied by some thoughts:

thank you for bringing this GALAXY brain take to my attention 😂 this guy comes in, all cagey about his past and his scars, always wearing baggy clothes but complaining about compression clothes (being on the run does a number on your joints and muscles), picking out a name for himself??? OBVIOUSLY he’s trans right

They somehow manage to have like three separate conversations about it without realizing they’re talking about two very different scenarios. Andrew only was so wrong for so long because scars on their own (and even being a criminal lbr) are such non-issues that it didn’t even occur to him that Neil could be talking about anything less important than being trans lol

Andrew had his little crisis about it and landed pretty solid on yeah he’s still into Neil regardless, and yeah he’s still super gay. He’ll figure out the rest from there. The only thing he didn't prepare for was Neil being uh. Cis

[opencommunion]

it’s very obvious that a lot of perisex trans people struggle to understand intersex cis experiences bc they still see the relationship btwn gender and embodiment through a strictly bioessentialist lens, and/or they see cis ppl as conformist stepford robots who have no autonomous opinions about their bodies

for some reason it surprises many perisex trans ppl to hear that an intersex cis man with breasts might like his chest and want it to stay as it is, or that an intersex cis woman with facial hair might want to grow out her beard, even though these are both pretty common experiences. trans perisex ppl will talk all day about how much they appreciate men’s tits and women’s beards as long as those men and women are also perisex (a cis perisex man’s tits can still be celebrated and desired in these communities as long as they’re there because he’s fat, not because he’s intersex) — the assumption is still that an intersex person should and will want to change these “anomalous” features

the bioessentialist implication here is that someone’s “natural body” isn’t the one that develops without intervention, it’s the one that accords conventionally with whatever their ASAB was. because intersex bodies never accord conventionally with our (completely arbitrary) ASABs we can never have a “natural body” in this framework, unless we’re “corrected” by medical interventions

it’s just shocking to me that so many trans perisex people believe that intersex cis ppl always want those interventions, and completely accept the bioessentialist idea that those individuals are being restored to the “natural” and correct body type for their gender. it’s like normative gender ideals are still enshrined for them but only as ideals for intersex people. ik some ppl will react to this post by thinking “well cis perisex people are still worse, why are you criticizing us?” but it’s bizarre seeing the work of unlearning bioessentialism left in this half-done state and treated like it’s finished

[emma-needs-attention]

I don’t shave every day. It’s not that I don’t “need” to; I have very dark, dense facial hair that grows quickly and remains pretty visible after shaving. When I do shave, I don’t try to cover it with makeup (beyond some powder to reduce redness). In most other ways I present very feminine, but I always have fairly obvious facial hair.

And it makes me feel terrible.

I started electrolysis a couple months ago. It’s excruciatingly painful, expensive, and it takes forever. In an hour-long session, my electrologist is able to remove hair in only a small region (about 1 square inch). A few weeks later, much of that hair comes back. I am told that it will take two to three years of regular treatments to remove it entirely. On top of that, I apparently have a condition called Post Inflammatory Hyperpigmentation, which causes the skin in affected areas to darken after treatment. For nearly two months after completing a single pass over my upper lip, my mustache was more visible than it had ever been, despite having significantly less hair.

And it made me feel terrible.

I know this is the best way for me to permanently remove my facial hair, but I just canceled all of my upcoming sessions and at the moment I have no plans to begin again.

If I could pay to have my facial hair instantly and completely removed I would empty my savings account. I am intensely aware of it any time I go out in public. If it makes me so uncomfortable, why do I not do more to hide it?

I feel incredibly privileged for a trans woman. I have a loving, supportive family. I have a well-paying job. I live in a very accepting area. I have never had a single person say anything negative to me about my gender identity, which was certainly not what I was expecting when I came out. It is important to me that I be visibly queer, and in my privileged position I am able to do that without fear. A year ago I didn’t think I would ever transition; now I want people to know that I’m trans.

I am disappointed with myself for wanting to remove my facial hair, for changing my voice. I am determined not to have to do more work than a cis person does. Cis women don’t have to shave their face every day. Cis men don’t have to shave their face every day. Why should I? This is who I am, what my body does. Shouldn’t I be proud of that? Am I not supposed to love myself the way I am?

But by that logic, why am I even transitioning in the first place?

I am doing more work than a cis person does. Cis people don’t transition, and transitioning takes effort. I know that there are cis people, both men and women, who do shave every day. Am I lying to myself? I’m a trans woman; aren’t I supposed to want to get rid of my facial hair? Shouldn’t I be trying harder? Doesn’t this give me dysphoria? Am I pretending not to have dysphoria so I don’t have to put in the effort? Does the fact that I’m not trying harder make me… I don’t know, less trans? Non-binary? Is it ok for me to call myself a trans woman? Am I lying to myself?

As a woman who was a man until thirty, there are things about my body that I must accept, that I won’t be able to change no matter how much money I dump into my transition. I’m tall, I have broad shoulders, I have large hands. No amount of surgery or hormones will change these things.

But there are many things that I can change, and while none of them are requirements for being a woman, they may still be changes that I want to make. Where do I stop? Am I finished transitioning when I’ve done everything that is physically possible? My goal isn’t to “pass,” at least not in the way that word is generally used. In a time when cis women are being assaulted because people think they’re trans—because they don’t “pass” as women—the idea of what it means to pass becomes blurry. Often when we say that we want to pass, what we really mean is that we want to be conventionally beautiful.

I am a woman. Therefore, I look like a woman. My transition goal is to pass as myself. I’ve spent the last year trying to figure out who I am so I can look like her. I don’t care whether people see me and think “that’s a woman.” I want to be able to look in the mirror and think “that’s me.” But it can be extremely difficult to separate your own image of yourself from society’s idea of what you should look like. Am I self-conscious about the size of my body because it doesn’t feel like me, or because I’ve been told that women should be smaller? There are tall cis women, there are broad-shouldered cis women, there are cis women with large hands. Those traits don’t make them less womanly.

For the aspects of my body that I do have control over, I am stuck wondering whether I am changing things to become myself, or changing them because I have internalized that the way I am is wrong. At the moment, facial feminization surgery is something that I think I might like to do. But how do I know that I want to do it for the right reasons? I don’t hate my face, but when I catch a glimpse of myself from certain angles I can’t help but think that it isn’t feminine enough. What I should be asking is if it’s Emma enough, but how can I know that? How do I know who I’m supposed to be?

I feel like I was supposed to be a cis woman, but… why? Who am I to say that I wasn’t supposed to be trans? That I wasn’t supposed to transition at thirty, to have both a male puberty and a female one? Being trans has made me more self-aware, more open-minded, more empathetic. The totality of my experience is what makes me who I am. Maybe there’s a world in which I was assigned female, maybe there’s a world in which I was put on puberty blockers as a kid. But the girl in those worlds isn’t me.

Loving yourself and wanting to change are two feelings that can coexist. I tend to think of body positivity as simply accepting yourself as you are, but it is more nuanced than that. As a trans person, who I am inside is not the same as who I am outside. Which one am I supposed to love? I do love myself, but I also love who I could be. I’m transitioning so that someday they’ll be the same person.

Over the past year I have become both my biggest supporter and my biggest critic. I constantly tell myself how pretty I am, how brave I am, how fucking cool I am (hey, nobody else is saying it and it’s true). This forced positivity has been fantastic for me. I can confidently say that I truly love myself for the first time in my life. But I sometimes feel guilty that I don’t love myself more.

I can’t help but stare at myself in the mirror all the time now. I actually bought a new mirror so I didn’t have to walk as far to do so. I’ve taken more selfies than I did in my entire pre-transition life. After many months on HRT, I finally see myself in my reflection. But my eyes refuse to focus on my stubble. Sometimes I catch myself thinking “I’m going be so beautiful once I get rid of this facial hair,” and it feels like a betrayal. Fuck you Emma, I’m already gorgeous.

[girlneuter]

well i've never felt belonging to the othereds just more alienation so rip

You Belong To Me Now. Call Me The Parental Unit, Protector Of The Wandering Queers

[a-polite-melody]

No but, when people say “trans men really are the men of trans people” they think they’re saying something about trans men, when they’re really saying something about their own ties to gender essentialism and adjacent-ness to radfem gender critical arguments.

Because we all know you’re not just saying “trans men are men” with that statement, but that trans men are bad because they are men and this is because men are ontologically bad, that man is not a neutral gender that would be able to exist if we eliminated the patriarchy because man is a gender that only exists as a positionality in patriarchy above women. And if that’s how the gender of man is built that means the gender of woman is also constructed from this framework, meaning that the gender of woman is nothing more than a positionality within patriarchy below man, and so gender is meaningless.

Which is honestly why I think we’re seeing so much “AFABs can’t be transfem” because gender is meaningless to an extent, but we still need to create these separations, then we obviously should be doing that separation along the lines of sex.

It all just rolls back around into bioessentialism, in the end, even if that bioessentialism looks different from the bioessentialism born in cis circles. And the idea that there needs to be some binary, either based on gender, or sex, or both, that we sort people into. And so really, gender and bioessentialism just feed into intersexism.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not letting my partner meet my parents?

I (26 “F” (closeted nonbinary passing as cis for safety reasons)) am queer, formerly out as a lesbian which my parents knew about for the past 10 or so years. They didn’t accept me at first and it caused serious issues, but around 3 years ago they begrudgingly decided I wasn’t literal satan spawn and don’t need to go to conversion therapy.

The thing is, they’re still very viciously transphobic, and my partner (26M) is a trans man. I never updated my parents on my labels because I don’t talk to them often, and I know they will throw a hissy fit about the mere existance of a transgender person instead of judging him as a person after meeting him. My mom spouts all sorts of transphobic rhetoric whenever I see her because she’s been keeping up with our state’s politics, and she also posts it on facebook all the time. She’s more against trans women than trans men but she still says awful things about both. She’s a bigot.

We’ve been together for a year now. His parents are supportive of him and our relationship and I’ve had dinner with them about 6 times. Unfortunately, his parents have started seriously pressuring him into meeting my parents, which I’ve always shut down in conversation. They apparently told him that it’s a “red flag” that I won’t let him meet my family.

So he asked me why he can’t meet my parents and I said it’s because they’re bigots. It’s true, they will actually say offensive stuff TO RANDOM TRANS PEOPLE they see just existing and minding their own business in public. I don’t want to expose my partner to that. He says he can handle it, but I told him the idea of my parents saying awful things to him makes me angry and uncomfortable, to which he shifted the blame to “me being embarrassed to be with him”. He then brought up that my parents initially rejected me but then came around years later.

I then told him that my parents are physically abusive, when things get bad at home in arguments I often get things thrown at me / hit with stuff. Yes, I’m an adult, I know it’s fucked up and why I don’t visit them if I can help it. He didn’t understand and said to just “call the police” on them if they got physical.

Part of me feels like maybe I should just bite the bullet and bring him to meet my parents and then deal with the shitstorm that will follow, but it’s really avoidable stress that I don’t want to deal with so I stood my ground. My partner keeps warping it into a “trust” thing and refuses to see my side of the situation.

Adding this as INFO bc I feel like people would ask, my partner is visibly a trans man and cannot pass as a cis man or a cis woman in a way that my parents would be “fooled” by, nor would I ever ask him to do something like that for me.

[paradoxproductions]

This is been many years in the making and I’m happy to finally announce I have stickers available! Both my bugs, and some funny sarcastic star emoji stickers are available on my kofi shop! The bug stickers even has an add on to get the matching print for only $5!

I have been so excited to make these! So, if you’d like to help a very broke / low income disabled queer who’s art has been constantly stolen and sold as stickers on the internet by getting some legitimate stickers, that’d be awesome! The price is also super negotiable, and if you’d like some but can’t afford the price point just DM me and we can work something out!

Reblogging would also be cool and helpful to help me reach my target audience!

I will absolutely be making bigger and better themed sticker sheet sets very soon if this isn’t something you fancy, so stay tuned for that!

(Also please ignore how in all the photos the stickers are uncut and have some smearing. I’m still working out my printer settings and they’re uncut to show size reference, they’re printed on high quality 8.5x11 glossy sticker paper, and no A Grade orders will have any ink smearing and all stickers will be pre cut before shipping!)

[zoolitsky-fandom]

MORE HEADCANONS BECAUSE I’M ALL POWERFUL

Please don’t get upset if you disagree with any of these!! This is just how I see the characters ^^ More context about the headcanons under the cut!

Nami

Transfem lesbian!!

Basically married to Vivi (who isn’t pictured but she gives me demigirl bisexual energy with a preference to girls)

CHUBBY BECAUSE I SAY SO!!!!! 🧡🧡🧡

And she’s still beautiful and wonderful and Sanji still simps for her. Chubby people are gorgeous

She’s technically pale but tanned a bit from being outside so much

Aaand bandaid because she’s literally just a normal girl and is susceptible to minor injuries unlike the other weird built different ppl on the crew (aside from Usopp)

sPEAKING OF USOPP!!! She’s absolute besties with him like they talk about everything and anything and gossip and all that jazz. They’re so special to me.

I’m not sure if bipolar fits entirely, but there’s definitely something with her mood swings and the intensity of her emotions. If this is insensitive at all please inform me

Chopper

Agender aroace reindeer fella??? SiGN ME UP

Both male and female reindeers have antlers so I used that to my advantage because gender silly

I think Chopper uses they/he/it, but slightly prefers to be referred to by their name rather than pronouns

Chopper has attachment issues, but I couldn’t find anything other than avoidant attachment disorder (which doesn’t seem entirely fitting). But it definitely gets very attached to others when it trusts them and has a hard time moving on.

Also I just like to draw Chopper more reindeer-like than Chopper’s canon design but aside from that I don’t really make too many design changes? Just… floofy Chopper… 🩷🩷🩷

Usopp

Panromantic asexual!!

Down bad for Sanji (he has terrible taste /j)

I had a revelation after drawing this so Usopp isn’t actually cis lol- they’re a demiboy but in a genderfluid kind of way, some days he feels more masculine and other days they feel more androgynous

I have very mixed feelings about the hair highlights,, I lowkey might not keep them but it was an experiment

FRECKLES!!! USOPP HAS FRECKLES PASS IT ON PASS IT ON!!!! 💛💛💛 Bandaid like Nami because!! They’re literally just a normal teenager!!!

Usopp has anxiety and borderline personality disorder because the feelings of superiority and inferiority? The constant fear? Being immune to Perona’s ghosts from dealing with mental illness their entire life???

Luffy

Asexual grayromantic

If he had a partner it would be gay regardless of his own gender expression (I’m projecting because I feel gay when I’m attracted to anyone)

Genderfluid, some days they prefer different pronouns but most of the time they use all at once (also is this ironic bc Luffy can’t swim but is swimming in fluid pronouns)

King of the pronouns!!! King of the genders!!! Will steal your pronouns and gender!!! Watch out!!!

I gave her vitiligo on a whim to be 100% honest, but I feel like it’s very fitting and also very fun to draw ❤️❤️❤️

I only did a headshot here because I have another post with a bunch of other drawings of this Luffy

I feel like I don’t need to explain but Luffy is very very AuDHD to me

He has so much energy and is easily distracted and gets really focused on things and likes to talk about anything and everything

Sanji

Bisexual-est guy on the planet (loves all boobs /hj)

Down bad for Usopp (they have great taste)

Demiboy but in an interchangeable kinda bigender way, he’s just both enby and male at the same time

Darker roots!! Sanji’s body hair is always notably darker than his blonde hair so I decided on darker roots

CURLY/WAVY FLUFFY HAIR SANJI SUPREMACY 💙💙💙

Depression—WHICH THEY ALL OBVIOUSLY HAVE BUT

Depression in the sense it’s the reason he smokes. It’s a kind of coping mechanism.

It makes them dazed enough that they don’t have to fully feel their own despair

GIVE HIM HEALTH PROBLEMS ODA YOU COWARD. I KNOW HE’S UNREASONABLY BUILT DIFFERENT BUT LIKE

Imagine Sanji wheezing and struggling to breathe after a fight!! Emotional scene with Chopper trying to convince them to stop smoking!!

Robin

Pansexual

Married to Franky 💜💜💜

Intersex demigirl! Like- the whole being called a monster/demon her whole life and trying to find someone who accepts her is such a good (unintentional) metaphor for the gender discovery experience,,

GIVE ROBIN THEIR MELANIN BACK!!! I don’t care if it wasn’t their original colors… neither were the blue eyes but I’m giving both to them because they deserve it!!

I wanted to give Robin more of a curly hair texture but I was concerned it would start to not really resemble her. I might play around with it another time though and see if I can achieve something still recognizable

PTSD

Do I even have to explain that-

They are traumatized and get flashbacks and night terrors

Franky

Bisexual

Married to Robin 🩵🩵🩵

TRANSMASC. I AM THE BIGGEST BELIEVER OF TRANS FRANKY.

He was abandoned by his birth parents, he has a name he doesn’t use anymore, calls everyone bro regardless of gender, HE LITERALLY REBUILT HIS ENTIRE BODY-

Even though Franky’s a cyborg I gave him visible top surgery scars. I think he would show them off with pride and doesn’t necessarily need/want to be seen as a cis man. He’s just a man who once had boobs yk?

The underside of his hair is an even brighter blue because silly!!

ADHD—he hyperfixates like a madman and is also very loud and passionate. Also idk if this is an actual ADHD thing but like he’s super empathetic and cries easily? I’m like that too so idk lol

Zoro

Demihomoromantic asexual

Hopelessly, dare I say pathetically, in love with Luffy. I want to clarify that this doesn’t make Zoro less gay and this doesn’t make Luffy less genderfluid.

Also as much as I adore trans Zoro, I think the fact that he’s a cisgender feminist is important. So I headcanon him as cis.

FLUFFY HAIR ZORO FLUFFY HAIR ZORO FLUFFY HAIR ZORO 💚💚💚

I can’t decide whether or not I like the striped hair,, I’m still on the fence about it lol

Covered in scars because he’s done so much training and fighting, I know they kind of look like something else but they aren’t, don’t worry

Idk why but I always give him a dark green undershirt

Autistic!! He has a narrow range of emotions, makes nonverbal grunts, super into swords, he’s blunt, follows routine, etc.

Aaaand that’s all of them! Phew! Thank you so much for reading 💖

Reblogs, asks, and comments are super appreciated!!

[willgrahamscock]

It’s like people are trying to punish bisexual women for still being attracted to men, but on the flip side you don’t see people telling gay men they can’t bring their boyfriends to pride. 💀💀

People’s obsession with a hypothetical bi women and her hypothetical cishet boyfriend are so weird, and I honestly think it ties into certain groups of queer people wanting to be the oppressor or high school bully they were personally subject to.

Isn’t it funny how in these hypothetical situations that bi woman’s boyfriend is always cis het. He’s never “questioning” or bisexual, pansexual, ace, demisexual etc.? They want an excuse to shame bi women for being attracted to men, which is insane because bisexual means you are attracted to men and women so why are you mad they’re actually attracted to both???

[scretladyspider]

Let’s talk about what demisexuality is not.

First off: what is demisexuality? We have to establish what it is to talk about what it isn’t.

‘demisexuality’ describes not experiencing sexual attraction until a close bond is formed. This doesn’t mean demis are attracted to everyone we bond with, and we can have differing desires towards sex. Demisexuals may or may not be demiromantic — they’re not one and the same.

While demisexuals can also be demiromantic, this isn’t true as a rule. Just like being asexual doesn’t necessarily mean you’re aromantic. It’s possible to be both, nothing wrong with that — but they’re not inherently synonymous.

*For some people who are aroace, include demi aroaces, their sexual and romantic orientations are deeply intertwined and there isn’t a big difference between the two. Other people use the split attraction model, which recognizes a difference in sexual and romantic orientations.

Many people think that “everyone is demisexual” because they read the definition and say “oh, that’s just being normal”. They’re confusing not experiencing sexual at ALL with waiting until a relationship is serious to have sex.

Demisexuality is a sexual orientation. The thing people confuse it with is a decision regarding sexual behavior that can be made regardless of orientation— the decision to wait to have sex until you’re emotionally close. That decision can be made by anyone, demisexual or not.

Often people read the definition and say “I’m demisexual, I wait to have sex until it’s not just sex. I want emotional fulfillment too.” When it’s explained that demisexuals rarely have sexual attraction and only under certain conditions does it occur, one of two things happens:

they misunderstand and assume that demisexuals are also experiencing sexual attraction without the bond and just not acting on it, or

they begin to understand that there’s a difference between sexual attraction and action.

More often than not it’s the former.

It’s interesting that this misunderstanding happens when demisexuality is described because allosexuals (people who aren’t ace) abstain from sex all the time but still feel sexual attraction. There’s this underlying assumption that everyone experiences sexual attraction.

But… just imagine that feeling of not being attracted and expand it. It’s doubtful that you experience sexual attraction to every person you see is physically attractive. Just expand that and there you go. Or imagine it like not seeing a particular color until you suddenly can.

Demisexuals aren’t all cisgender and heteroromantic. But there’s nothing wrong with demis who are! If ace isn’t enough for you to respect someone is LGBTQIA+, you don’t understand or accept asexuality or the orientations under its spectrum.

Demisexuality is NOT “just being a woman”. Demisexuality also isn’t “the patriarchy convinced young girls not having casual sex was a sexuality”.

There’s so much wrong with both of these, and they tie together, so I put them together here. Not only does this thinking see cis women and feminine people as being inherently “more” asexual, it robs allos and aces alike of bodily autonomy towards sex and sexuality. It bleeds out from conservative Christianity — it’s the same ideas that lead us to abstinence only sex “education” and that women must be sexually available at all times or their husband will cheat to “get his needs met”. Saying that cis women & feminine people are just all demisexual or ace removes the bodily autonomy of those who want sex and those who don’t by assigning a culturally acceptable narrative as more important than lived experience. But sexuality isn’t limited by cisheterosexism.

The truth is there are still a lot of people learning they’re under the asexual umbrella as educators and advocacy groups get education out there, and even in queer spaces asexuality isn’t always accepted, let alone its spectrum. A lot of people don’t even know it’s an option!

In addition, and partially because of, tropes like this, asexuality and everything under it are considered more “feminine”. Sex is seen as a symbol of status and depending on your gender and presentation, that status gets lowered or raised depending on the number of partners had.

Cis men and masculine aces exist, and also have to contend with cultural pressures to “perform” sexually, whether they want to or not. Erasing these experiences doesn’t help further acceptance towards asexuality or just sexuality in general.

And! Cis women and feminine people can have and enjoy casual sex! Others don’t but still experience sexual attraction regularly. Being allosexual isn’t limited to the masculine. Libido can also exist without sexual attraction. Human sexuality is just not as narrow as you think.

That’s where I’ll leave this one. Remember, it’s okay to be demisexual. It’s not okay to dunk on a group of people you didn’t bother to try to understand. Keep an open mind. There’s room at the table for learning, not bigotry.

[sharess-festhall]

This started off horny, but I ended up cutting out the bulk of the horniness in favor of sincerity: vampire spawn being sterile has helped me be less squicked by quite a few things, and it's helped me feel more comfortable with certain real aspects of sexuality.

I have quite severe tokophobia irl, but fantasizing about my fTav and Astarion genuinely makes me more comfortable with exploring certain types of sex in fiction. And sure, I mean creampies and cumplay and such, yes, but even just plain PIV sex in general has been noticeably easier for me to get into because of them, which in turn makes me happier and more eager to have it in real life as well.

I like that I can just enjoy fantasizing about them getting swept up in the moment without needing to make a mental note of “fantasy birth control”. I like to imagine that they both know, and delight in the fact that even though they’re a cis man and woman, they can enjoy exploring intimacy together, however and whenever they want, with no risk or fear of a pregnancy. And, I also just find an attractive man happily and confidently shooting blanks to be both comforting, and just about the hottest thing I can imagine.

I'm still somewhat uncomfortable with things like breeding and pregnancy kinks, but a happily sterile spawn!Astarion just really means a lot to me.

[lexithwrites]

jegulus with trans James headcanons??

Oooo I love trans James too, v underrated headcanon

- if regulus was cis I feel like he’d still be extremely gay and he goes to queer events in his town with Sirius and that’s how he meets James

- he hasn’t had top yet but like the slut he is (affectionate) he walks around with his binder on and some sweats and regulus is just drooling

- testosterone did amazing things for his jawline and back definition too Oof regulus wants to climb him like a tree

- also trans James has the potential for them to be either the same height or taller regulus and hehehehehe I love it, James likes looking up at this hot, mysterious, grumpy nerd and flirting with him

- James tries to act like his sex drive hasn’t gone up because he doesn’t wanna scare regulus off but reg is all for it

- when they first start dating James is always trying to impress him with his clothing and like wants to be super masculine but reg just thinks he’s hot in whatever he wears (the suits are a plus)

- they go to so many drag shows together and bars and clubs and they’re just in their own little queer lovely bubble

- deciding who tops and who bottoms is a bit of a challenge bevause neither of them knows what they’d prefer

- they try both

- James bottoms first and reg is kinda nervous because he’s had one boyfriend and was the bottom but James assures him he’ll do so good and he’s wanted this since they met

- reg is,,,very good with his tongue (james’ voice does get a little higher and it makes reg rock hard)

- they’re both very open about their likes and dislikes, in and out of the bedroom, they’re great communicators

- James is also fiercely protective of regulus because a lot of gay/bisexual men will approach him and he’s like ‘nope he’s mine’ and will just kiss him

- regulus is very helpful when it comes to dysphoria, I feel like James hates his chest but can’t afford surgery rn and regulus is always telling him that he’s handsome no matter what, that he’s HIS man no matter what

- effie and Monty are always nervous when they meet james’ partners because they don’t want their son to be taken advantage of or used so they’re kinda tough on reg at first but they warm up to him almost immediately and realise he’s the most supportive partner James has had

- james’ parents have trans and pride flags outside their house too, they’re the best ally’s

- when James does get surgery regulus is there every step of the way, he stays in the hospital the entire time and when he wakes up he covers his face in kisses and brings him flowers and helps him home, he cleans him and makes sure he’s got enough pain killers, he’s very attentive

[defining-trans]

I’m confused - do you think radfems are just as bad as TERFs?

In my opinion, there is no meaningful distinction between radical feminists and trans exclusionary radical feminism.

I believe that all radical feminism is inherently trans exclusionary—radical feminism that is wholeheartedly accepting of trans women is hostile towards trans men and vice versa, and radical feminism that claims to be accepting of both is hostile towards nonbinary people.

Radical feminism is an ideology built on the premise that women must have spaces where they can segregate themselves from men for their own safety and well-being. The only difference distinguishing offshoots of radfem ideology is how they define ‘men’—aka, who is part of the group they aim to exclude from their safe spaces.

Some include trans women in their definition of men, others trans men. Those who claim to include both still don’t entertain the notion that men of color and otherwise marginalized men can suffer under the patriarchy without reaping the same benefits as their privileged counterparts as long as they’re cis.

So no, I’m not a fan of any type of radical feminism, no matter how inclusive some claim to be.