#this comic was based on a really stupid joke and now this is my favorite thing i have drawn in a long time wtf

[spontaneousglitterbees]

WIP of a comic, but I overwrought this panel by lots and I think it’s kind of just a painting now.

woe, hydraulic angst be upon ye

[seasidemew]

I assume Mundays is asking the mun question idk how these things work X3 BUT who was your favourite character to design, who is your favourite to draw and who's your go to for like getting in the drawing groove?

I think that's the basic idea, but I know other mods do fancier events and stuff.

BUT of the cast specifically, I'd have to say Six was my favorite to design, Eve is my favorite to draw, but Lilith is the one I randomly doodle most for no good reason.

Six was the most fun to design both initially and when I went back to add stripes to the twos. For both her and M1, I found a pixel mewtwo base, gathered a ton of screenshots from their respective films, and went to town on trying to figure out what colors I liked most. I probably still have the psd somewhere, I could show some of that work if anyone was curious. I really wanted to make both of them stand out from the sea of mew/two blogs that existed then (and even more now), but ultimately Six's disabilities ended up being the most interesting thing about either one. Then I added the stripes. Six's specifically are based on the Clone Blastoise from Mewtwo Strikes Back, with some elements of Venusaur's lighter color stripes and the original mew design mixed in. Since Blastoise's markings are mostly on his shell, I took a lot of creative liberties. I initially wanted her to have only the lighter color stripes, but added the darker ones to replicate the points on original mew's tail and feet. She has the most complex stripes of everyone, but finally starting the comic has shown me that they're not that bad once you figure them out.

I just love Eve. Her design is heavily based on an "ancient mew" I made years ago in an attempt to capture the sharp mewtwo-ness of the canon Ancient Mew drawings in the card and the original movie. The perfect missing link. Basically the only changes I made to put her in the blog were to give her a pronounced sternum and refine the shaping of her tail. Plus, the original OC was way more mean and aloof than Eve is. She's fun, she's simple, she's relaxing, she hits all the right notes. I almost said Syn for this, but he's actually a pain in the ass, and I think all of the crackships for him have kind of burnt me out on enjoying him. ... Speaking of which I still have more to do. Oops. Plus, he keeps kicking my ass in Pokken's story mode. To his credit though, he is the one I know most well due to extensive chatting with @mushroom-for-art and such.

Lilith, I love Lilith, I love her hate and anger, I love her badassery, I love her beauty, I want her to rip me in half, I'd thank her for it. She's the reason this blog exists and, prior to the stripes, was the main thing to set this blog apart from the others. Her demeanor is based on the idea that, in the original Japanese script for the film, Mew is written to be a god displeased with the clone made from it. It jokes and mocks and overall doesn't take mewtwo seriously until it realizes how much power its progeny actually has. My headcanon is more that she stopped the battle because she was tired and bored and pissed off, getting mewtwo and the clones to leave so the stupid humans could get out of the way and they could actually finish their battle on her terms. At the moment, I don't know if that rematch ever actually happened or not, though. Anyway, she is usually my go-to because I love her and her character, she's pretty and soft, and she's hard to get right.

Hope that wasn't too long or too dry of a read. Thank you for the ask!

[wonderfulworldofmichaelford]

Is It Really That Bad?

Come. Gather round and listen to the legend of the Funny Vampire Director, AKA the Funny Nazi Director, AKA Taika Waititi.

Raised in the way of the director, Waititi was taught to make good movies, delivering the sort of funny and heartfelt films most can only dream of making. He directed, and he wrote, and he acted. He was sensitive, like a smile. And his love of filmmaking did not discriminate in what he could make. He once made a hilarious vampire mockumenatry that got a spin-off TV series. Another time, he proved that you could make Blazing Saddles in the modern day, except with Nazis!

But Waititi's greatest achievement was cameoing in The Suicide Sqaud. Oh, wait. No. It was making a good Thor movie, of all things. But sadly, in making a good Thor movie, he set himself up for failure with the sequel. In fact, he set himself up for spectacular failure. Mediocre reviews. Audience backlash. Criticism from the actors and directors. And bad reviews from all sorts of internet guys, again and again and again. And again.

Poor Waititi had to watch the internet’s respect for him explode. And then he said, 'What have I done?' It seemed that everything he’d worked for with Thor, he lost. And so he maybe got fired by Marvel and went back to making real movies for a change. But just because he was done with Marvel, didn't mean he was done with superheroes. He teamed up with James Gunn and set off to deliver the most powerful and thematic line in The Suicide Squad. He got in shape, putting in the hard yards to become a respected filmmaker again. Taking pains into gains and never skipping the chance to direct a movie based on Tower of Terror. He put in the work to go from the butt of jokes to a guy who would hopefully deserve an Oscar win.

But with all that being said, there was still a confused reviewer just trying to figure out if maybe the backlash to Thor: Love and Thunder was a bit overblown. Because really, this movie couldn’t possibly be as shitty as The Dark World, which committed the sin of wasting Christopher Eccleston. So he sat down and gave the movie a rewatch, accepting he was only good for one thing... Determining that age old question, 'Is Thor: Love and Thunder really that bad?'

THE GOOD

So maybe this is a hot take, but I really did enjoy Jane’s return and her romance with Thor and find it to be one of the film’s best aspects.

Now, don’t get me wrong, a lot of the writing here is clunky and poor Natalie Portman is saddled with a lot of really stupid dialogue now that she’s the Mighty Thor. But seeing her and Chris Hemsworth act off each other again in a less dull and restrictive fashion is so nice, and seeing Portman kick ass is a lot of fun too. She even wields Mjolnir in some pretty creative ways here! And her death is actually a genuinely powerful and touching scene that they don’t immediately fuck up with a lame joke.

The soundtrack, while not even close to touching the Guardians of the Galaxy soundtracks, is filled with Guns N’ Roses banger after banger. I grew up listening to these guys, so honestly I’m predisposed to like any scene where they play one of my favorite tracks by them.”Sweet Child O’ Mine,” “November Rain,” “Paradise City,” and “Welcome to the Jungle” are all whipped out at just the right time to keep my attention from flagging completely, so I’ll give them props for that. They aren’t the most inspired choices, but I’m a sucker for classic Axl.

The Axl above? Decidedly less so. Still, despite this film’s reputation for really bad effects and really bad costumes and just in general looking embarrassingly cheap because Disney abuses the animators, there are some extremely cool visuals here and there. The shot of Falligar the Behemoth in particular is so good they slapped it into every trailer, and a climactic battle on a monochrome planet looks way too good to be in this movie. But by far the most fantastic thing is the comic-accurate depiction of Eternity.

And of course, I would be remiss to not praise Christian Bale’s performance as Gorr the God Butcher. The man immediately has you hooked with the opening scene, which details his backstory and shows how he began his vendetta against all the deities of the Marvel universe. Then we have his fantastic climactic confrontation with Thor on the black-and-white planet, and then there is his final scene before Eternity. Each and every time he shows up, it’s completely clear that Bale is giving it his all and acting his pussy off, giving a performance that is honestly kind of astounding considering what’s going on around him.

THE BAD

Unfortunately, while Gorr is a fantastic performance, he suffers from the fact his character has absolutely no cohesion and is barely in the film. He shows up for maybe one big fight in the first hour, then completely disappears from the film until the third act, during which time he just sits around with a bunch of children and terrifies them. And despite being “The God Butcher,” we see him butcher precisely one single god in the whole film, and that’s in the film’s opening. Groot has as many onscreen god kills as Gorr. That’s fucking pathetic. Bale’s magnificent performance is strong when it counts, but so much of the dramatic moments feel unearned because he hardly does anything outside those moments. The fact they cut out so much material including him meeting with Peter Dinklage’s King Eitri and Jeff Goldblum’s Grandmaster, really stings. Would it have been a crime to cut out those annoying fucking goats and instead give Gorr more to do like, oh, butchering gods?

It doesn’t help that the story never actually refutes any of Gorr’s points. Every other god we see in the film is egotistical, hedonistic, a coward, or all three at once, with even Thor reverting into a corny blowhard for much of the movie. Zeus is pretty much emblematic of this problem; while I actually did enjoy Russell Crowe’s performance (even if it is, ultimately, a half-baked attempt at recapturing the magic of Grandmaster from Ragnarok), the fact that Zeus is nothing more than a blowhard more concerned with orgies and showing off to all the other gathered deities just kind of proves Gorr right. The gods don’t care, they are refusing to help their followers, and frankly the universe would probably be a lot better if it was littered with Knowheres instead of having these horny clowns prancing about.

Then we have the Guardians. The glorified cameo from the Guardians of the Galaxy that was hyped up in all the marketing. Despite being in the movie for maybe ten minutes and despite Star-Lord having 95% of all the lines between them, nearly every single one of them feels completely out of character. Star-Lord, on the other hand, actually feels like he was rerailed in time for Gunn to take the reigns back, but it doesn’t make up for how awkward and pointless it all feels. Although it is incredibly hilarious that after all of them spent Infinity War fawning over him they all now seem to barely tolerate him, with it being confirmed none of them kept in contact with him after the events of this film. I honestly don’t blame them.

A lot of returning characters really suffer. King Valkyrie gets it pretty bad since her subplot where she searches for love was dropped, leading to her feeling really superfluous in the plot. Lady Sif gets it even worse, with her barely even being in this movie; one has to wonder why they even bothered keeping her alive. Thor gets hit especially bad here, because he seems to have reverted from his post-Ragnarok characterization all the way to pre-Thor characterization, with all his hedonism, goofing, gallavanting, insecurity, and egotistical traits ramped up to maximum levels.

But the most divisive returning character of all is Korg. Korg became a fan-favorite due to his appearances in Ragnarok and Endgame, where he was genuinely a funny comic relief character who juxtaposed his intimidating rock golem design with a friendly demeanor and the chipper voice of director Taika Waititi. The thing is, both of those films used him sparingly, so that when he got a lame joke it wasn’t so bad because it’s one up against dozens of good ones. Here though he gets to be a main character and even the narrator, and boy does he get old pretty quickly. The thing is, though, that even if he’s not particularly funny here… I still like Korg. He’s just too damn charming, As lame as his jokes are, as lame as his fake out death is, as pointless as he ends up feeling to the plot, I just can’t hate the guy. I guess it helps that he gets to be Disney’s 52nd First Gay Character, but actually for real this time because in the end he gets to make a baby with a rock guy named Dwayne. I also really like the theory that the reason the whole film is corny is because Korg is narrating it, and he’s an unreliable narrator peppering the story with lame jokes and underplaying elements that should matter. Does it save the whole movie? No. Does it make Korg any funnier? Also no. Does it add an interesting layer that at least keeps me from wanting Korg dead? Yes, yes it does.

And really, every single problem here is something that was there in Thor: Ragnarok. Zany comedy? A terrifying, threatening villain with a murderous vendetta who gets weirdly underplayed and barely interacts with the heroes? A villainous character played entirely for jokes? Jokes that completely and utterly destroy the tension of any given scene? The big difference is that in Ragnarok, at least some of the jokes were funny, and Thor had more interesting characters to bounce off of. And maybe most importantly, that film knew when to dial back the comedy to let cool or emotional moments breathe. And maybe even more importantly than that, it knew to keep Korg to a minimum. This film doesn’t do that at all, with nonstop gags undercutting nearly every dramatic moment. It’s ultimately hard to give a shit about anything going on when the characters give so little of a shit about it that they’re cracking jokes.

And let me tell you, if you couldn’t already tell, the jokes are fucking bad. This is basically what would happen if you asked Seltzer & Friedberg to make Marvel Movie. This is the epitome of all those jokes about Marvel dialogue having the characters go “Well that just happened!” to the point where I’m shocked it’s not actual dialogue. The horrendously unfunny screaming goat meme is a pivotal plot point in this movie; that’s the quality of jokes we’re dealing with here. And while there are a few decent jokes here and there, there’s just too many fucking jokes to pay them any mind.

IS IT REALLY THAT BAD?

Somehow this is one of the most overhated and yet rightfully disliked films ever made.

Like, Schafrillas was right to call this the Shrek the Third of Thor films. It’s not funny, it derails beloved characters, it’s incredibly annoying, it wastes a good villain, and the writing is just so hackneyed and ridiculous. This is absolutely not a good film at all. But the way you hear some people talk about it you’d think this film killed their grandma.

Like I know bad comedies are some of the worst kinds of films out there, and this film is definitely horrendously unfunny at every opportunity, but it has just enough good ideas and just enough strategic deployment of Guns N’ Roses songs that it just barely manages to be passable in my eyes. I definitely think this is a mediocre movie, and it is emblematic of everything a bad Marvel movie can be. But at the same time, it manages to be unfunny in ways I didn’t think were possible from a director and cast this talented. I’ll be honest, on my second watch through of the movie I was more bored than infuriated with this film. It has its moments, but it’s absolutely one of the weakest efforts Marvel has ever put out.

This film is pretty much what critics once accused Batman & Robin of being: An overindulgent, campy, unfunny smear on a cool hero. As you well know by now, I don’t agree with them on that, but it’s a somewhat fitting descriptor for Love & Thunder. I don’t think it’s a smear on Thor, who has been way too inconsistent for me to get mad about him being taken in some wild direction, but overindulgent, campy, and unfunny are pretty apt. Still, I don’t think this is nearly as bad as a lot of people say. It’s not bad in a “crime against humanity” way, at worst it’s bad in a “I know the people making this are capable of better and I kinda feel like this is the fault of studio executives at Disney” kind of way. If you like it, sure, that’s valid! I don’t think there is no value in this film at all, especially compared to some stuff I’ve reviewed for Is It Really That Bad. But if I never have to see this movie again, I won’t exactly lose sleep over it, and I’m sure many people feel the same.

Still, I’d have to have a heart of stone to not find the ending, which features Thor and his adopted daughter (played by Hemsworth’s own daughter) becoming a cute little superhero team and getting a corny title drop right before the credits, really sweet. Yeah, it’s not a good movie, but at least it’s better than the first two Thor movies or the unseasoned oatmeal that is Eternals.

[moderntimeadventure]

FAQ

Welcome to the Modern Time Adventure AU! It’s basically an interpretation of what Adventure Time might be like if it took place nowadays. Before getting into it you may want to check out this FAQ to figure out some basics of the AU. Enjoy!

Spoilers?

Yes yep yeah I've included events and characters that appear in both the original show, distant lands, and a teensy bit from the comics, so if you're looking for something spoiler free, this isn't it.

Plot?

As far as I'm concerned, there isn't really one. Mostly it's everyone being stupid and having fun but I hope to also included some sideplots based off the original show plots, such as certain relationships, events or scenarios happening.

What's different?

Honestly, I think the biggest thing that's changed is the timeline. It's my AU so I decided I can do whatever I want, so the occurrence of the events slightly different .. but other than that there are some small changes with character specifics that aren't really worth mentioning in detail here.

Does Finn lose his arm in this AU?

Short answer, yes. Long answer, I do feel it's important to Finn's character and arc that he loses his arm, however the basis of the AU is the gang having fun and I didn't want to make it too angsty. Also, Finn is only 15 here and the current thought is that he won't lose his arm until he's older, around age 17 like in the show.

About me:

Hiya my main is @mispelled and Adventure Time has become really special and close to my heart recently, I know I'm late and the fandom is pretty much dead but. I don't really care, I'm gonna have fun anyway :)

Primary characters:

Finn, Jake, Bonnibel Bubblegum, Marceline, Phoebe/Flame Princess, Fern,

Secondary characters:

Simon Petrikov/Ice King, Peppermint Butler, BMO, Neptr, LSP, Susan Strong, Frieda, Tiffany Oiler, Cadebra, Spader, Blaine, Huntress Wizard, Betty Grof, Prismo, Lady Rainicorn, Kim kil whan, Charlie, Viola, Jake Jr, T.V.,

Characters that I've included but aren't really part of anything important:

Jermaine, Sweet P, Tree Trunks, Mr Pig, Aunt Lolly, Uncle Gumbald, Cousin Chicle, Neddy, Earl Lemongrab, Lemonhope, Gunther, Martin Mertens, Minerva Campbell, Hunson Abadeer, Joshua, Margaret, Billy, Canyon

(warning: this is going to be very long. You've been warned)

Character Specifics

Finn Mertens (he/him), 15. Idiot teenager who lives in the treehouse in Jake and Lady's backyard. Jake often sleeps there too because Finn will sometimes get nightmares. Likes plants. Favorite color is blue. Aro ace. Finn and Phoebe dated for a bit and then had a fight and broke up, didn't talk to each other for three months, and since then have made up, now they are besties.

Bonnibel Bubblegum (she/her), 17. Very studious, serious about her future. Favorite subjects in school are science and technology, but also enjoys home ec. Has a pet mouse named Science. Loves Marceline's songs but wouldn't admit it during the time they weren't talking. Questionable morality. Autistic and has anxiety. Favorite color is pink. Ace lesbian. Lives with her Aunt Lolly and Uncle Gumbald, cousin Chicle and foster siblings. Has a twin brother Neddy who doesn't live at home. Helps out in the candy shop most days after school

Jake Dogg (he/him), 32. Dad Humor ™. Also fart jokes. Plays the viola. Sneezes loud as heck. Gets very passionate about things he cares about. Likes going for long walks. Bisexual. Is Legit the best dad and brother ever. Loves his kids and his wife and his brothers sm!!! Isn't officially married to Lady but calls her his wife very often. Stay-at-home dad but tends to do random jobs during the day while most of the kids are at daycare/school. Finn's official best friend and bro. Fave color is yellow but dark blue is a close second

Phoebe Flame (she/her), 15. Hot temper, daddy issues. Has an older brother named Flint but isn't close with him. Found a passion in freestyle rapping and often raps with Neptr. Finn called her "flame princess" while they were dating (because of her last name and her temper) and he sometimes still uses the nickname to antagonize her. Favorite color is orange. Bisexual. Growing up her father was super overprotective and low-key abusive. She ran away from home for a bit but they made up eventually and now have a tense relationship on the mend.

Marceline Abadeer Petrikov (she/they), 18. Acts angry and punk but is actually a major softie. Writes music and takes inspiration from mitski, girl in red, chloe moriondo, cavetown and the red hot chili peppers. Had a vampire phase in middle school and still has a soft spot for YA novels. Favorite color is red. Bisexual. Has played in a band but has come to realize she prefers writing alone. Has insomnia which is when she writes her songs. Ambidextrous, which explains her ability to play bass with both hands.

Simon Petrikov (he/him), 58. Former Professor of Archaeology. Likes penguins. Plays the drums. Getting over a mental breakdown involving amnesia

Fern Campbell (he/they) 15. Finn's lil brother. Only reconnected with Finn recently because neither of them knew the other existed. Autistic. Nonbinary. Has a lot of angst™. Feels like he needs to one-up Finn at all times and live up to his reputation. Questionable morality and anger issues. Has a green thumb and really likes plants. Favorite color is green.

BMO Dogg-Rainicorn (he/they/she), 5. Adopted kid of the Dogg-Rainicorn family. Very imaginative, likes to play pretend. Has an imaginary friend, "Football", and plays soccer in an after school program. Is in Lady's first grade class

Pepper Mint Butler (he/they), 6. Very smart (especially for his age). Likes to use big words and will sometimes swear. He's That Weird Kid who knows random facts about creepy things. Plays DnD. Draws comics (which the rest of the cast likes to read and discuss at length). Lives at the Gumbald Foster Home. Is in Lady's first grade class.

Neptr Dogg-Rainicorn (he/him),11. Adopted kid of the Dogg-Rainicorn family. Super smart. Small for his age and uses a wheelchair most of the time. Loves pie and is in Tree Trunk's good books, often hangs out at her pie shop. Beatboxes with Phoebe.

Lady Rainicorn (she/her) 31. Works as a first grade teacher during the day. Mother of seven. Such a good mom and teacher. Speaks Korean at home, but English while teaching. Pansexual. Best friends with Bonnie and they'll sometimes get together to talk shit and eat junk food.

Charlie Dogg-Rainicorn (she/her), 6. Likes witchy stuff, mythology and tarot cards. Twin to Jake Jr. Is in Lady's first grade class

Jake Jr Dogg-Rainicorn (she/they),6. Daddy's girl. Twin to Charlie. Is in Lady's first grade class

T.V. Dogg-Rainicorn (he/him), 4. In the same dare care as Sweet P

Viola Dogg-Rainicorn (she/her),2. Very sweet, wants to be an actress.

Kim Kil Whan Dogg-Rainicorn (he/him),6 mon. Literal baby

LSP (she/her), 16. High school junior. Gossip girl. Often acts low-key bratty, sassy, attention-seeking and willfully ignorant, and enjoys texting on her phone but actually has depth that she doesn't like to show on the outside. Marceline's insider informer

Frieda (they/she), 27. Very open to different things, likes trying new hobbies. Always working on a different project. Very involved with helping Susan and has become a regular visitor at the Amnesiac Support Group. Sapphic and in a relationship with Susan

Susan Strong (she/her), 27. Super loyal and has strong intuition about who to trust. Likes picking people up. Has a golden retriever personality. After a fight with Frieda as teenagers, she stalked off and was involved in a car accident, leaving her with amnesia and aphasia. Subsequently ended up in the same ward as Simon and after a whole bunch of shenanigans was able to reconnect with Frieda several years afterwards. Hasn't recovered her memories but has strong feelings of intuition and remembers knowing Frieda from before. Sapphic and in a relationship with Frieda.

Cadebra Daniels (she/her), 6. Pep's #1 best friend (but he'll deny it). Loves sleight of hand magic. Super hyper and has ADHD. Is in Lady's first grade class

Tiffany Oiler (he/they/she), 23. Plays the viola. Old friends with Jake who acted as an older brother figure until Finn came along. Has a mini rivalry with Finn about being Jake's bestfriend/brother. Has soon come to respect Finn and now they get along, if somewhat grudgingly. Has been adopted by Joshua and Margaret Dogg

Blaine Jay (they/them), 6. Spader's best friend. Has become grudging friends with Pep and Cadebra, and often feels like they need to earn Spader's attention. Is in Lady's first grade class

Spader Petersen (he/him) 7. Frenemies with Pep. Used to be really stuck up but has taken it down a notch since then. Has sensory issues with noise so he almost always wears noise cancelling earphones. Carries around a rock named Larry. Is in Lady's first grade class

Betty Grof (she/her), 54. Simon's fiance and Marceline's mother figure.

Huntress Wizard (they/she), 16. The emo/scene kid at high school who has a mutual platonic crush on Finn. She ends up bonding with Fern after they realize how much they have in common. Aro

Prismo (they/he), 33. Fashion designer, has his own homemade pickle brand, "Prismo's Homemade Artisanal Pickles". Plays the banjo. Best friends with Jake from their college days when they dated. Pansexual. Somehow always has an answer to every question, though it's not always correct. Will often get the gang to model his clothes for his brand

Jermaine Dogg (he/him), 34. Jake's biological brother, Finn and Tiffany's adopted brother. Artist and keeper of family heirlooms.

Mr Pig (he/him), 64. Married to Tree Trunks, Sweet P's adopted father

Tree Trunks (she/her), 65. Pie shop owner and Sweet P's adopted mother

Punchy Gumbald (he/him), 43. Bonnie's uncle. Runs a collective foster home and small candy store, "Candy Kingdom". Husband to Lolly, father to Chicle

Sweet Pig-Trunks/Sweet P (he/him), 3. Adopted kid of the Pig-Trunks family. Has nightmares. In the same dare care as Viola

Chicle "Crunchy" Gumbald (they/he), 19. Bonnie's cousin. Six foot four. Self conscious about his laugh. "The funny one™". Away at college most of the time, doesn't always feel comfortable being at home with the foster kids.

Lolly Manfried Gumbald (she/he), 42. Bonnie's aunt. Runs a collective foster home and small candy store, "Candy Kingdom". Wife to Punchy, mother to Chicle

Hope Lemongrab (he/him) 11. Earl's little brother. Foster kid of the Gumbald Foster Home.

Earl Lemongrab (he/him) 16. Autistic. Foster kid of the Gumbald Foster Home. Needs glasses but never wears them.

Martin Mertens (he/him) 40. Finn and Fern's scumbag biological dad. Con artist. Has brain damage.

Neddy Bubblegum (he/him), 17. Bonnie's twin brother. Autistic. Currently residing at a separate care facility

Hunson Abadeer (he/him), 50. Marceline's scumbag biological dad. Business man™.

Minerva Campbell (she/her) 39. Finn and Fern's biological mother. Doctor.

Margaret Dogg (she/her) 63. Jake, Jermaine, Finn and Tiffany's mom. Runs a detective firm with Joshua, her husband.

Joshua Dogg (he/him) 62. Jake, Jermaine, Finn and Tiffany's dad. Runs a detective firm with Margaret, his wife.

Billy (he/him) 35. Finn's celebrity crush

Ok phew that's over for now

Specific Situational things that are important:

Canyon (she/they) 33. Billy's girlfriend

Finn and Fern were born to Minerva (doctor) and Martin (former con artist) Mertens. Incident happened where Martin and Finn were confronted by Marten's past clients (people he'd cheated), they ended up running. Finn was found and adopted by the Dogg family, Fern grew up alone with his mother who never told him about his brother. Martin returned to his con artist ways. Minerva tried to search for her missing family but never found them, and tried to move on with her life.

The Mertens

Finn and Fern didn't know the other existed, being separated as babies. They eventually met by accident when they bumped into each other at [an event]. After the fact, Fern took matters into his own hands and stalked Finn down via the internet.

Mertens brothers reunion

Joshua and Margaret Dogg run a private detective investigation firm. They have four children- Jacob, Jermaine, Tiffany Oiler and Finn Mertens

The Doggs

Jake and Lady are not officially married but live as if they are. They have five biological children, Kim Kil Whan, Charlie, Viola, Jake Jr and T.V., as well as adopted children BMO and Neptr. Finn lives with them, usually opting to stay in the tree house. Jake is a stay-at-home dad but tends to do random jobs during the day while most of the kids are at daycare/school. Lady works as a first grade teacher

The Dogg-Rainicorns

Punchy and Lolly run a collective home where they care for foster children. Some of the residents of the home include Pep, Earl and Hope Lemongrab, Bonnie and (formerly) Marceline. The Gumbalds also own a small candy store called "Candy Kingdom" where the kids will help out after school.

The Gumbald Foster Home

After Marceline's mother died, Simon, who was a close friend of Marcy's mom, took her in as his own. Marceline lived with Simon and Betty, his fiance, until soon after taking her in, Simon began experiencing a mental breakdown/psychotic episode that lasted a couple months, and is still recovering. Betty attempted to reunite Marceline and Hunson Abadeer, who wasn't interested in raising his kid. After the attempt ended in disaster, Betty was unable to care for Marcy and longer and she was transferred to the Gumbald Foster Home while Simon was committed to a psychiatric ward. Only when Simon was on the road to recovery and was released from the hospital did Marceline return to living with him and Betty.

The Simon/Marceline relationship

Simon had a mental breakdown/psychotic episode which ultimately resulted in dissociative amnesia. Marceline created an insert oc for him called The Ice King to try and help them both while dealing with the situation. Simon did get professional help but the amnesia remained for quite a while. He now attends an Amnesiac Support Group, which Susan also attends.

The Ice King Incident

Marcy and Bonnie were good friends throughout elementary school and the beginning of middle school, until they started to fall apart because of Bonnie adopting more responsibilities in her life (including helping her brother Neddy, dealing with family dynamics, the foster home, and accepting responsibilities at the candy shop) and as a result, Marcy felt ignored and left out especially because that's when she needed a friend (while going through her own issues with Simon's mental downfall). The two had a big fight and didn't talk for a few years but they're patching up their relationship and aren't dating yet, but both have feelings for each other.

Marceline/Bonnie relationship

Kara and Frieda were good friends as teenagers but after a fight, Kara stalked off and was involved in a car accident, leaving her with amnesia and aphasia. She subsequently ended up in the same ward as Simon and after a whole bunch of shenanigans involving changing her name to Susan, they were able to reconnect several years afterwards. Susan hasn't recovered her memories but has strong feelings of intuition and remembers knowing Frieda from before.

Susan/Frieda relationship

[just-an-enby-lemon]

if you're still giving us your uh completely honest opinions: who is your favorite and least favorite version of Eddie and why?

Based on my completely "honest" opinions that are 100% true my favorite version of Eddie would have to be War of Jokes and Riddles. I love his desing, the question mark scar is not even a bit stupid and dark aproaches to Riddler are my cup of tea forever and awalys. OBD Riddler is a likely contender as well. There are other Riddlers I think I might enjoy if I properly read like the red one I adore when he hurts childrem.

Now my least favorite being "honest" is really hard. There is a lot of Riddlers that mean very little to me. Unburied Riddler is a likely contender specially because Unburied revived my love for superheros after the MCU destroyed it wich is just a terrible fate. Who wants to be a comic book fan?

P.I Riddler. I just hate detective stories. Specially with moraly ambiguous detectives. That's why Lemony Snicket is a characther I hate soo much. Sherlock Holmes dreadfull? My spotify is full of mystery podcasts because I just hate them soo much I need to watch them all.

Gorshin's Riddler is one I truly hate. As everyone knows I'm completly against light takes or fun. It's either overly dark or shouldn't exist. And Gorshin is just too silly. And the stimming? I don't want my characthers to be full of moviment even less in a autistic coded way. Hate hate hate that.

Arkham Riddler. He is edgy enough but he is just too fun and too complex and the voice acting is too good. It's wrong. The puzzles are not annoying but still while I ADORE finding that FUCKING TROPHIES everywhere. I don't think they make sense or add to the characther or are a good thing at all.

There is others but this is the major ones. I just hate a lot of Riddlers. He is my least favorite Batman villain and that means a lot as the only Batman characthers I like are Arnold Flass and Lock Up. Actually I hate most DC characthers. Unless when they are facist. Frank Miller's Batman my beloved.

That's all.

[princesable]

wwait please do tell ur issues with omori if u feel like it. as a somewhat omori enjoyer (<omocat sucks) i wanna see others' opinions as well

ok on my puter here u go. im not gonna write out like. an essay im just gonna list things out in bullet points because thats easier for me so sorry if this is hard to read/understand. quick side note i've played this game around 3 times because i love showing it to people so they can get mad about it with me. i feel like this is important because ive like. actually played the game and not pulling all of this out of a cut down letsplay (also just so no one gets mad at me i pirated it) but also my memory is awful. i am planning to play it again and actively take notes so i can write something more coherent. also putting it under a read more because i didnt realize how much i had to say about this

the story sucks tbh. like its an interesting concept that could have been done in an extremely impactful way but i felt nothing. like i didnt care about mari and i didnt care about sunny because he had like. no personality outside of "silent main character everyone likes". like if you dont care about mari the whole story falls apart. it relies very heavily on you caring about the two of them which is FINE but they do a really bad job of making me actually give a shit.

hero got like fucking nothing in the story and that bothers me like. outside of sunny we should have seen how mari's death impacted him the most because. you know. THEY WERE DATING? but we never get to spend time with hero. like all he is is "the nice one" i wish we got to see. anything with him but i swear they just weren't allowed to have him express emotions that werent extremely mild or something. actually now that i think about it it feels like hero was an after thought in like. everything. his dream word ability is barely used and when it is it feels like anyone could have done it. have it literally just be that he can flip switches is stupid. you could remove hero from the game and it would impact nothing.

AUBREYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY the church confrontation scene was like. GENUINELY GOOD? and then after that they just forget to do anything with her. like it pisses me off how that scene was actually good and the only part that genuinely got me to feel anything and then she just gets nothing. like her "bully" scenes are pretty good and i genuinely sympathized with her but it kind of felt like. you werent supposed to? idk if that makes sense because you totally WERE supposed to feel bad for aubrey but having the kel high fives directly after multiple scene where you make her cry felt so. fucking weird. maybe that was the point idk. aubrey's my favorite character i wish omocat knew how to write

SPEAKING OF KEL. I REALLY REALLY DONT LIKE HOW THE GAME TREATS HIM. he's supposed to be the comic relief but like. EVERY joke is either "kel is gross/stupid" or "aubrey is mean to him for no fucking reason" and it gets old really fast because he's just a kid??? like him and aubrey are just mean to each other thats their whole thing which is FINE i GUESS but its not funny?? its just incredibly mean spirited and not fair to him as a character. why couldnt he have just been silly without the game seemingly hating him for trying to have fun. like most of his moveset is based around being annoying its. its weird man idk. also the fact this is a fucking item in the game

when i got this for the first time i put my head in my fucking hands man this sucks.

Basil. basil could have been an EXTREMELY interesting character but hes just so. whiny. it gets old really fast. the final fight with him was pretty good i guess. i dont have much to say about him sadly because i just like. dont remember. nothing with him stuck with me. OH WAIT the black space bit where you repeatedly kill him in extremely gruesome ways was. kind of fucking weird. because hes 10. it was unnecessary like if you REALLY wanted the fact that sunny is trying so hard to repress anything that reminds him of what he did to be represented through basil dying you could have just done it a couple times idk. weird scene.

ok moving on from characters the art is. a lot. its very hard to tell the dream world party members apart because omocat just has really bad same fact syndrome, it doesnt help that they all have the same color palettes. speaking of color palettes why do the overworld sprites white wash kel and hero. its less noticeable with hero but like. come on man its not hard to color pick your own art

still on the art the fact everything moves is fun in concept but REALLY distracting in execution. theres been multiple fights (specifically sweetheart, the king crawler and humphrey) where i've gotten awful headaches and had to take a break because i felt sick from all the movement lol. also the animation for releasing energy does NOT help who thought making the screen shake that much was a good idea dear god. like seriously this game needs to have some kind of warning

using sweetheart as an excuse to talk about how the dream world its such a fucking slog. i UNDERSTAND the point is that sunny is doing everything in his power to not reach the truth so he creates roadblocks but oh my goddddddd its so annoying to constantly have the plot take a backseat so we can go to a wedding or go to a casino or GO IN THAT STUPID FUCKING WHALE. the fact that there is a fucking mod that removes the humphrey segment should say enough. like that part in particular was soooooo fucking bad. its so boring. the humphrey fight has THREE FUCKING PHASES. I DONT KNOW WHO THOUGHT THAT WAS A GOOD IDEA BUT THEY SHOULD BE KILLED. ITS AN AWFUL EXPERIENCE

the emotion system is an interesting idea but i wish they did more with it. once you figure out that everyone has one theyre best with you stop playing with them. it stopped being fun to battle because its just make aubrey angry -> make sunny sad -> make kel happy -> have hero do fucking nothing -> hit them. idk maybe they could have had like. special emotions for boss fights?? im not sure how that'd work but i wish they added little twists every now and then to keep all the battles from feeling the same.

the real world isnt much better honestly. all the aubrey shit made me angry and the battles are so weirdly unfair its just not fun. like it doesnt penalize you for losing real world battles but its like. idk they suck. also the fact it doesnt tell you food doesnt heal you in the real world fucked me up when i first played because i was so used to the dream world i spent all my money on soda and then spent the entirety of the real world on like 1 hp i cant add spoilers on tumblr so animal harm/death and suicide warning for this next part. if you dont want to read that theres nothing else after it so youre good to just stop reading now

i dont like the black space. like i briefly went over it in the basil segment but it left such a bad taste in my mouth. especially the part where you are seemingly "forced" to cut your fucking cat open as it begs you to free it and the only way to not hurt it is to kill yourself?? ok.

speaking of which the fact the only way to leave the dream world and wake up is to kill yourself complete with a little sound effect is weird to me. idk man omori is 10 im not exactly keen on watching a child kill himself several times.

honestly the games handling of suicide is gross to me. obviously i dont think you should never talk about suicide i think its a very important topic but they way its handled in omori is almost. glorified? idk if that the right word. omori/sunny can kill himself so many times in this game and i just found that a little weird. also basil can kill himself and you can see his body just. sitting there. ok im running out of writing steam if i think of anything else i'll make another post or you have any follow up questions let me know im gonna go watch scott the woz

[brokentoys]

A GOOD THING ABOUT MY PORTRAYAL | ACCEPTING | @deciphertheriddler​ SENT :

Hmm let me try to think of just one thing. I really like how you portray Eddie in love. Him falling in love easily, how he deals with sex - really like reading your thoughts about that.

Can't stop at one, I'm back. I like how you portray his addictions! And his mental conditions, every time I see OCD (as a person who suffers with this) portrayed as not being only a germ thing I get stronger!!!! You put so much effort on him, it's great and it shows

Thank you so much! Even before the movie, there were,,, lots of people who made jokes about Eddie either being a nerd, someone who’s never had sex, or someone who doesn’t care about relationships or sex. Sadly, the Ark Knight portrayal only pushed this when they had him say that love is stupid. I disagree with this entirely, and I really hate this. (Funny enough, despite me loving City and Origins, I hate Knight’s depiction of him.) Because in the comics, there have been moments where Eddie pretty much eluded that if he was loved, then maybe he would’ve been a different person. Maybe he wouldn’t be the Riddler. Hell, this was even shown in recent comics. (Such as Ed’s ex boyfriend, wondering had he been more supportive/understanding of Eddie - maybe Eddie wouldn’t have went down a path.) Also, Eddie used to heavily flirt with women, is VERY associated with sex workers, as well as frequently visit a sex club in the comics. And you’re telling me this man only thinks of love as a “”chemical reaction”” and that he’s “”above”” it? No. Eddie is a “whore” just like his friends. And he’s proud to be. Also, not to mention - In Origins, Eddie also had a pinup calendar in Origins, which featured strippers - thus, I don’t think Ed does view sex as just a chemical reaction. (I know some ppl will argue just how “canon” Origins is. To them, I say, Origins was a damn fine depiction of Ed - and I’m accepting it as canon to the Ark games. Even if my blog’s depiction doesn’t FULLY follow it.)

Also, it just... makes sense to Eddie SO MUCH. Like growing up, he never had real life in his love. So now that he’s an adult, he’s so desperate for it - that he chases after it any opportunity he can get. It just shows he’s still that child clinging on for attention.

And YES. My own Eddie has a compulsion for not only never telling lies, and also leaving riddles behind (which is kinda the same thing, as it’s his version of “telling the truth.”) But he also has this thing for organization, and being “orderly.” And sometimes I fear people will think this is the same as being clean or a germphobe. But NO. Eddie doesn’t care how “dirty” or “dusty” his things get. Hell, his carpets, and furniture are filled with VARIOUS of stains! Eddie only cares if they’re in the right place. Like his knickknacks MUST be assorted in this way - but he literally doesn’t care if they catch dust or not. Same with his pencils, they must be sorted in a certain drawer - but again, the condition they’re in - doesn’t matter. I based this hc on the fact that, when I was looking up people talking about their OCD, I noticed lots of people have a compulsion for counting things - 1, 2, 3, 4. In that order. Also, because one of my favorite Eddie comics, features a scene where he starts panicking - because a woman forced him to tell his riddles out of order. He was supposed to give the third riddle, but she made him repeat the second riddle. It made him panic so much, that not only did he started yelling at her, but he also had to meditate in order to calm himself down.

Therefore, I thought that Eddie has a compulsion for things being in order. That everything must be where they belong, but not necessarily clean.

Anyway, I rambled on for too long here, I just have too many thoughts!

[breadqueen95]

Dress - Bucky Barnes

bucky barnes x fem!reader

wc: 5k

plot: bucky and y/n’s relationship is new, and they don’t want to share with their friends just yet. but something as simple as a dress can change anyone’s mind, even the winter soldier. 

content warnings: kissing. physical affection. flirting. allusions to sex. drinking. being drunk. language. bucky being a flirt. 

a/n: this is for @natasha-romancff and her taylor swift writing challenge! it took me awhile, but i’ve had a ton of fun writing this. so many bucky fics are angsty, and rightly so the man has some TRAUMA. but for my first bucky fic, based on dress by taylor swift, i wanted something happier for him 

***

Damn. That was a lot of leg.

“I don’t know,” you muttered as you stared into the mirror, “aren’t these things…a little classier than this?”

“Uh…have you met Tony Stark?” Natasha grumbled as she continued to scroll through her phone. “The man has never been classy a day in his life.”

“Well I know he isn’t, but fancy people show up to these things. I just don’t want to embarrass myself.” You were currently standing in front of the full-length mirror in Wanda’s room, staring at the reflection of a woman who didn’t quite look like you.

But it was you, wasn’t it? It was just…that you was wearing a very short, very sexy red cocktail dress. The sweetheart neckline was a nice touch, but the back was completely open. And that hemline? Definitely hiked way up past your knees.

“Y/n, relax,” Wanda reassured in her lilting accent, “sure, the dress is a little…spicier…than you’re used to, but it’s in a good way.”

“I’m pretty sure every single person would be able to tell I spend my days in tactical gear. God, I’m not sure I even know how to walk in heels this high!”

Heaving a dramatic sigh, Natasha threw her phone down and looked at you in the mirror. Her eyebrows were raised, and she was giving you her usual ‘don’t give me that shit’ look. It nearly had you shaking in your very strappy black heels.

“Are you kidding me, y/n? I’ve seen you strut in enough fancy parties during undercover missions to know that you’ve got this.”

“Yeah,” Wanda scoffed as she took a sip of red wine from her glass, “all she’s nervous about is what Bucky will think.”

Rolling your eyes, you tried to hide how much that sentence affected you.

“C’mon, Wanda. You know Bucky and I are just friends.”

“Do friends undress each other with their eyes whenever they’re in the same room?”

Damn it. Damn Wanda and her stupid perceptiveness.

“You’re reading too much into it, Wanda.” She just laughed at you, acting like she knew so much better.

What you knew and wasn’t ready to admit to your two best friends, was that she was right on the money.

Bucky Barnes, the infamous Winter Soldier, your favorite person in the entire world, was now your boyfriend. He had been for a few weeks now. The two of you were insanely private people. Hell, it had been years before the two of you had finally learned everything about each other. Once you had gotten past the walls the other had so carefully crafted, well…

At that point you were in love.

But the others didn’t need to know that, not yet at least. The Avengers were a family, your family. They were really the only true family you’d ever had. But Bucky…Bucky was finally yours. And you were his. You didn’t think it was crazy to just want to enjoy that, just the two of you, without everyone else sharing their jokes and opinions just yet. They did it out of love, you both knew that, but you just wanted him all to yourself.

As you looked back at your reflection in the mirror, you took a minute to really consider what Bucky’s reaction might be. He had the best poker face in the room no matter who he was with, but you knew him well enough to know how he was feeling just based on his eyes. He’d always said how much he loved red on you, and he adored every and any excuse to touch your skin. Those steel blue eyes of his would absolutely burn once he saw you in this dress.

And fuck, that was something you really wanted to see.

“Well, if you aren’t going to wear that dress, you better pick something else,” Nat said, jerking you from your fantasies, “we need to be there in twenty minutes, and we all need to touch up our makeup.”

“Actually…I think I’ll wear it,” you said confidently, trying to hide your grin as you ran your hands down the silky fabric.

What you didn’t see was Natasha and Wanda sharing a secret smirk behind you, like they’d known what you’d do the whole time.

***

Six weeks ago, everything had changed for you and Bucky.

You’d known how you felt for a long time. Bucky Barnes, despite his past, was the kind of man anyone could fall in love with. He was sincere, kind, generous, witty…everything you’d ever wanted in a partner. He had been your best friend for even longer.

It had been a long time before you could even admit your feelings to yourself, let alone to him. After everything the two of you had been through, who had the time and mental capacity for romance? It just didn’t seem important. You just chalked up your feelings to being such close friends. All you wanted was to be near him, even if you just sat in silence doing different things. Just being in the same room as Bucky brought you a sort of peace you’d never had before. Whenever he touched you, even if it was just a brief hug or brushing your back to get past you, your skin erupted into goosebumps. But that was just because physical touch was still foreign to you, right?

And his smile. God, his wonderful smile…

Bucky didn’t smile much. He hid behind a mask of stoicism, a remnant from the trauma of his horrible history as the Winter Soldier. Showing any sort of emotion, especially happiness, was hard for him. But when he finally let himself smile? It was the most beautiful thing you’d ever see.        

It took several sleepless nights wrestling with those confusing feelings to figure it out. You didn’t just see Bucky as your best friend. You had it bad. Not just “oh my god he’s so handsome” bad, like the “I would take a bullet for you I’m so in love” bad. That revelation? It left you euphoric. It also left you scared.

Because you were so sure Bucky didn’t feel the same. And that thought was like a knife to the heart every time it flashed through your mind.

So you kept it to yourself. You tried to keep things as normal as possible, but your heart kept fluttering whenever he walked into a room. Being so close to Bucky meant you confided in each other about pretty much everything, and he knew you well enough to know you were hiding something.

It all exploded on a Tuesday night in the compound.

Tuesdays were your movie nights. Bucky had a lot of pop culture to catch up on, so on this night every week he would come by your room to watch a movie. It was a weekly tradition that kind of started by accident. You were shocked he still hadn’t made time to watch Lord of the Rings, so you forced him onto your couch with popcorn and The Fellowship of the Ring. He loved it so much, and immediately asked if you guys could watch The Two Towers the next week. How could you say no to him?

Tonight, you were watching 13 Going on 30. It was your all-time favorite romcom, and you figured you could both use a break from all the action and fantasy movies you’d been cycling through. Something with a happy ending was worth indulging in.

“Does that Matt guy look like Banner to you? Or is it just me?” Bucky asked through a mouthful of popcorn.

“Heh, maybe a little,” you said, “Give or take a few years.” He laughed at that, and you forced yourself to laugh quietly. You wanted to blurt out your feelings every time you looked at Bucky, so you’d gotten quieter and quieter every time you spent time with him. It was an awful reaction, and you knew he noticed. But it was better than losing his friendship, right?

After that awful and painfully obvious forced laugh, Bucky let out a huge sigh and paused the movie. He set the bowl of popcorn down on the coffee table in front of the couch, then turned to face you. Exasperation and hurt glimmered in his eyes.

“Y/n, what the fuck is going on with you?”

“W-what do you mean?”

“Oh come on, don’t give me that,” he said sharply, “I know you better than anyone, and I know for a fact there’s something you’re not telling me. Is it me? Did I do something wrong?”

“What? No, god no!” You exclaimed.

“Well it must be something I did, because you’ve never been this quiet around me and it keeps getting worse. I hate it, and I want to know what I did so I can fix it.”

“Bucky, I’m serious, it’s nothing you did—”

“Then why? Why are you shutting me out?” He cut you off angrily, arms thrown wide. “You’re my best friend, I just don’t get why—”

“I don’t want you like a best friend, Bucky!” Your eyes went wide as the words flew from your lips. In the most comical way, you clapped your hand over your mouth as if you could stop the words that had already been said. Bucky’s eyes narrowed in confusion.

Oh fuck. He didn’t get it. Curse him and his old man ways.

“What does that even mean, Y/n? Are you saying you don’t want me around anymore?”

“Bucky, of course not. God, I would never want that. Never in a million years.”

“Then you better explain, because if you haven’t noticed, I’m over 100 years old. I need a little help here.”

“It means, uh…um,” you stuttered, wringing your hands together. “Is there any chance we can just forget I said that?”

“Nope, not a chance.”

“It means…it means that I care about you. As more than a friend.”

His entire face seemed to crinkle as he processed that. If you weren’t freaking out, you’d be obsessing over how damn cute it made him look. Then his eyes got wide as he began to make the connection. Your stomach nearly fell out of your ass as his eyes lifted again to meet yours.

“I…I think I know what you’re saying,” he nearly whispered, “I just need you to get real specific real fast, because I’m not about to say anything until I know exactly what you mean.”

“It means I’m in love with you, okay?” You burst out. Even through your mortification, there was a sudden sense of relief. A secret as big as that had definitely been weighing you down. Now that it was out there, that was one less thing you had to worry about.

His eyes grew even wider. How that was possible, you didn’t even know. That beautiful mouth of his began to turn up into a small smile as he gazed softly at you.

“You’re in love with me?” He asked, his smile getting wider with each passing second.

“What, you need it carved into stone or something?” You couldn’t help but sass him. Did you fucking stutter?

“No, it’s just…I never thought you’d feel that way about me.”

“Well, clearly I do. So you – wait, you mean you’ve thought about this before?”

“Of course I have,” he said as he shrugged, “I’ve been in love with you for two years now, how could I not think about it?”

You were instantly filled with warmth and pure bliss. In all your obsessing over your own feelings, you’d never allowed yourself to consider that he might feel the same about you. It just didn’t seem possible.

“I’m sorry,” you burst out, holding a hand up, “you’re telling me you’ve been into me for two years and didn’t say anything?”

“Why didn’t you?” He shot back, inching closer to you.

“Because you’re my best friend. I didn’t want to lose you because of stupid feelings I have.”

“But…I have those same ‘stupid feelings’ for you. So can we just cut the whole act and get on with it?” Bucky brought a hand up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing along your skin so gently.

“Uh…um…get on with what?”

“Well I’d kinda like to kiss you, if you’re cool with it.”

“Bucky Barnes did you just use current slang to ask if you could kiss me?” You didn’t move an inch as his face moved right in front of yours, breath intermingling as you gazed into each other’s eyes. God, was this really happening?

“Yeah, guess your lessons worked,” he murmured.

“Well you better kiss me, then.”

As soon as your lips met, it was like coming home.

***

That memory, your favorite memory, replayed in your head as the three of you stepped into the elevator. Nat and Wanda were happily chatting about who would be there, what kind of antics Tony would cook up tonight, if there would be music we could actually dance to. You know, normal party things.

All you could think about was how long you had to stay until you could sneak off with your boyfriend.

You were so happy Wanda and Natasha had convinced you to wear this dress. When you’d first put it on, the difference from your normal look was so jarring that it took you a few minutes to get used to it. But now that you had, now that you felt the silky fabric shifting against your skin as you moved, now that you saw how dangerously long your legs looked in these heels…

Damn, you felt sexy.

And that sexy feeling? It made you want Bucky’s hands all over you.

But this was a party. A party thrown by Tony Stark, one of the most perceptive and observant people you’d ever met. If you left too soon, if he thought you weren’t “having enough fun”, he’d be more than a little upset. So you had to stay, drink, mingle, maybe dance a little…and then, maybe later, you could go do what you actually wanted.

The elevator pinged, indicating you had reached the topmost floor of the compound. This floor was home to a huge communal space, often used for just hanging out with the team. But on nights like tonight, Tony went all out and turned the space into something that resembled…a club?

The three of you stepped out into the massive room, upbeat music already blasting from the speakers. Typical Tony – he never really outgrew his love for dancing and parties. The bass thrummed through your body, making you want to move to the music. The lights were dim, but you could still tell who was around. It looked like you were some of the last members of the team to arrive. There was a huge bar off to the side, and Natasha headed that way right away. You turned to ask Wanda if she wanted to follow Nat, but she was already making a beeline for Vision. Smiling, you just turned right back around to follow Natasha. A drink sounded pretty good right now.

As you made your way to the bar, you felt more than a few pairs of eyes on you as you walked. You sneakily looked around as you went, noticing men and women watching you with admiration, and dare you say it, longing. As someone whose job was to blend in with the background all the time, this was a different and slightly addictive feeling. You leaned on the bar next to Nat right as the bartender slid her drink over to her.

“Straight whiskey tonight? Damn, going hard.” You quipped.

“Hey now, you know I can handle my liquor. It’s you we need to watch out for, you lightweight.”

Laughing, you scanned the party guests, looking for the one person you wanted to see. Tony had had arm around Pepper’s waist, both laughing at something Rhodey had said. Bruce lingered around them, drink in hand and looking a little nervous, but still happy to be included. Wanda and Vision were sitting quietly on one of the couches, both looking absolutely smitten with each other. Scott Lang, one of the newest additions, was busting some moves, while Peter Parker laughed as he watched. Thor, who was visiting from Asgard, laughed boisterously as he watched various guests try to lift his hammer. You couldn’t help the smile growing on your face. You loved these people so much.

Then, you saw him.

Bucky was with Sam and Steve, as usual. But even as Sam and Steve were talking animatedly next to him, those gorgeous blue eyes of his were glued to you. There was a kind of intensity in them you hadn’t seen before. Your breath whooshed from you body as he grinned at you. Trying to maintain the suggestive image your dress gave you, you managed to send a flirtatious smile his way, then turned back around to face the bar. Leaning against the counter, you knew he’d get an eyeful of your bare back. God, this was fun.

The bartender finally made his way over to you, and you ordered two tequila shots.

Nat turned to you, one eyebrow arched in surprise as she asked, “And you say I’m going hard? You can’t just down two shots right away, babe.”

“I’m not doing two shots; you think I’m stupid?” The bartender slid the shots over to you along with two lime wedges. “One is clearly for you.”

Unable to hold back a laugh, Natasha put her arm around your shoulders and pulled you into her side as she said, “Why the fuck not, let’s do it.” The two of you went through the process: salt, shot, lime. You couldn’t help but wince as you downed the harsh liquor. Of all the shots in the world, tequila probably tasted the worst. The only reason you kept going for it was the warmth it traced down your body, and you felt your muscles begin to loosen up.

“Two more,” you called over to the bartender.

“Uh, no,” Natasha shot at you, grabbing her whiskey, and pushing off the bar, “I’m good with my top shelf shit, you keep going after that gasoline if you want but I’m out.”

“C’mon, Nat,” you called out, “what am I gonna do with two shots?”

“I’m sure you’ll find someone else, babe.” She said with a wave over her shoulder.

Sighing, you turned back to the ridiculously pretty bar (seriously, how much had Tony paid for this thing?). Who else would help you look cool and sexy at a bar for your secret boyfriend?

Okay, that was the cringiest thought you’d ever had. Gross.

As the bartender slid the tequila in front of you, you steeled yourself for the nastiness that was about to happen.

“Fuck, I didn’t think this through,” you mumbled.

“Yeah, you tend to do that,” a deep voice answered on your right. Instead of being the slightest bit surprised, you couldn’t help but smile. You’d know that voice anywhere.

“Something I can do for you, Barnes?” You looked up at him from under your lashes.

“Well, it looks like you’ve got an extra shot there. Thought I could bail you out.”

“Is that all?”

Bucky shifted so that your arms were just barely touching. His hand was right next to yours, and you reached out with your pinky to lightly brush his.

“Doll, you have the gall to show up in that dress and ask what I want as if you don’t already know?”

“Sorry Buck, I’m a little slow, must be the tequila. You should probably be a little clearer.”

Putting on quite the show of reaching for one of the shots, his mouth somehow ended up right next to your ear.

“I want you.”

It was lucky everyone was so distracted and couldn’t see how you shuddered at his words. Trying to maintain brain function, you managed to take the shot with him. You were now fully facing each other. He was wearing the cockiest smirk you’d ever seen, one that would put Tony Stark to shame. You couldn’t help but respond with that same energy despite the jitteriness his three little words had reduced you to.

“Well why don’t you—”

“Hello, my friends!” A booming voice sounded between you as Thor threw a huge arm over each of you. Bucky, with his stupid super soldier strength, didn’t really have a reaction to it. You, on the other hand, stumbled a little under the weight and force of it. “It’s so good to be back with you tiny humans.”

Was…was he slurring his words?

“Thor…are you drunk right now?”

He simply laughed in response. Well, that answered that.

“Of course I am, tiny person! It can’t be a party without good Asgardian wine.”

“Wait…you have literal god wine?” Bucky, who had a look of vague irritation on his face up to this point, now looked interested. Maybe even a little excited?

“Of course, metal appendage.”

“Dude, you can’t just call Bucky ‘metal appendage’—”

“He can if he lets me have some,” Bucky interrupted.

“We have a bargain!” Thor slapped Bucky on the back before scurrying back over to where he had come from, probably to get the wine he had promised.

“Bucky, you can’t even get drunk,” you hissed, “what exactly is the point of this?”

“Since everything happened, I haven’t found any alcohol strong enough to get me drunk. I figure god wine is worth a shot.”

“Bucky—”

“When I kiss you against a wall later, I wanna be a little tipsy,” he whispered in your ear, “that cool with you?”

Unable to keep yourself from smiling again, you nodded as Thor sauntered back over. Ever since that moment a few weeks ago, right before he kissed you for the first time, asking “is that cool with you?” had become your thing.

And the idea of Bucky kissing you against a wall? Yeah, that sounded pretty good.

***

As it turns out, Asgardian wine is just as potent as Thor had promised.

For the first time in over seventy years, Bucky Barnes was certifiably drunk. It made him feel like the Bucky from all those years ago, and it was the most incredible thing. Here he was, over 100 years old, partying, and all his favorite people were here.

Including his ridiculously hot girlfriend.

Even as they both flitted around the party, Bucky and y/n still found each other’s eyes, even from across the room. They would send winks, smiles, even funny faces. All he wanted to do was be right next to her, talk and dance with her all night…

But they had agreed. They wanted to keep their relationship a secret for now, keep the attention off of them for a bit while they got to know each other in this new way.

But god damn, that dress.

Y/n in red was…indescribable. It didn’t matter what she wore, she was always the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. But in red? In this dress?

She was breathtaking.

“Buck, you breathing?”

A hand waved in front of his face, snapping Bucky’s attention back to the people around him from Y/n’s back. He had been imagining putting his hands all over that back later and had gotten more than a little mesmerized. He managed to get his eyes to refocus, finding a drunk Sam smirking right next to him and an even drunker Steve dancing next to him. But what Steve was doing couldn’t really be called ‘dancing’ per say…more like an aggressive wiggle.

“Why wouldn’t I be breathing?” Of all the things he could’ve said to get Sam’s attention off of him, that wasn’t it.

“Uh, probably because the girl you’re in love with decided to show up and show off tonight? Pretty sure you’re drooling, man.”

Despite himself, Bucky slapped a hand across his mouth, only reducing Sam to wheezing laughter. Knowing he had been caught, he rolled his eyes and grimaced a little. Of all the people to catch him, he wished it hadn’t been Sam.

“I wasn’t…staring… at y/n, I just never see her dressed up is all.”

“I never said anything about the girl being y/n.”

“…fuck.”

“LANGUAGE,” Steve yelled out, pointing a finger at his two friends before returning to his shimmying.

Turning back to him, Sam added, “Just go be with her, Buck. You’re not fooling anyone, and neither is she.”

“We’re that obvious?”

“A few weeks ago you’d at least try to hide it. Now I’m surprised you’re not jumping each other’s bones right here right now.”

“Point taken,” Bucky said, lightly slapping Sam’s shoulder before power walking over to his girl.

***

“Nat, if you don’t stop asking about Bucky and I’s relationship, I’m going to kick you,” you called over the music before taking another swig from your glass. It was no Asgardian wine, but the human stuff wasn’t half bad in your opinion. It wasn’t like you could drink the god shit, anyway. If you had even one sip, you’d be swinging from the ceiling like Miley fucking Cyrus. You were pretty drunk as it was.

“Okay, fine,” she said with a shrug as she took a sip of her whiskey, still as calm and collected as ever. “You’re almost as drunk as he is, you’ll be talking soon enough.”

“Oh? Is that your spy master plan?”

Natasha was still looking as unbothered as ever, but as she looked across the room over your shoulder, her face split into a savage grin.

“It was, but it looks like I might not need it.”

“What do you me—”

Your words were cut off as a large, warm hand enclosed around yours. Whirling around, you were suddenly face to face with the man himself. Bucky was clearly having a good time. His mouth was relaxed into the cutest smile you’d ever seen him wear, and he moved without his normal stiffness and intensity. He threaded your fingers together, smiling down at you with so much love it was a wonder Nat hadn’t said anything yet.

Looking back in front of you, ready to explain yourself, you only found empty air. Guess she’d seen all she needed to, but honestly, you really didn’t care. All you’d wanted the whole night was to be exactly where you were right now; hand in hand with the man you loved.

“We’re just kidding ourselves, doll,” Bucky called next to your ear, “Sam said we’ve been pretty obvious.”

“Nat said the same,” you answered with a sheepish smile, “kind of hard to keep my face under control when you’ve got that leather jacket on.”

“You’re blaming me?” He asked with mock indignation. “You’re the one who looks,” he gestured wildly to your whole body, “like that!”

Trying ignore the heat spreading over your cheeks, you shot back, “Like what?”

“Like the most…” he screwed his face up in the most adorable way as he searched for words, “like the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” As the last few words tumbled out of his mouth, he gazed at you with such a softness you almost melted right into the floor.

“Wanna get out of here?” You asked, finally giving up the game. It was pointless, really. Now, all you wanted to do was for your boyfriend to keep his promise and kiss you against a wall.

Wrapping an arm around your waist, he answered, “Absolutely.” Without looking at a single soul, the two of you began walking as quickly as you could for the exit. You and Bucky were both leaning on each other a bit, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Stepping out into the light of the hallway, you blinked as your eyes adjusted after the dark room you’d spent the last few hours in. Bucky led you until you were right in front of the elevator, and he lazily pressed the button to go up. There was tension in the air between you, like a thread that was being pulled. Biting your lip, you stared at the doors in front of you. You knew if you so much as looked at the man next to you, you’d jump him right then and there.

The shining doors slid open, and the pair of you walked in, his strong arm still around your waist. His grip wasn’t loose in any sense of the word. Bucky kept you right next to him, even as your legs wanted to drift all over the place. You pressed the button for the residential floor.

As soon as those doors slid shut, that thread of tension snapped.

Bucky whirled you to face him, then walked you backward until you were pressed against the wall of the elevator.

“I promised I’d kiss you against the wall, didn’t I?”

He didn’t even wait for a response. His mouth was on yours in an instant, lips moving together like a dance. The kiss was slow and unhurried. You tried to bring him closer, linking your hands behind his neck and pressing yourself to him. Instead of responding in kind, he unwound your arms from around him and pinned them above your head.

Oh damn.

Okay.

No complaints here.

“You’ve been teasin’ me all night just by wearing that dress, sweetheart,” he murmured in between the kisses he trailed down your jaw, “I think it’s my turn.”

“Would it change your mind knowing I only wore this dress so you could take it off?”

The heat that bloomed in those blue eyes of his was unmistakable. As the doors opened on your floor, he swept you up into his arms and began to walk purposefully to his apartment. All the while, he kept that signature cocky smirk of his you’d come to adore.

“Bucky?” You asked once he’d walked into his unit.

“That sentence was the single most attractive thing you’ve ever said,” he murmured as he set you down. Even still, he kept you pressed against him. “But nah, I’m a patient guy. I think I’ll take my time.” He followed this by resuming his slow and sensual kisses, and you couldn’t help but melt into them.

“I love you,” you whispered against his lips.

“I’ll never get tired of hearing that, doll. I love you too.”

***

[rlmfanfic]

Interview with Mike from 2003

The following is the unabridged interview from Garreb Gilchron’s old FastForward website (note the dickish jab at Mike when Gilfalon calls it “the famously unreleased Gorilla Interrupted”). I’ve included all of the original photos from the site.

Mike is especially snarky throughout the interview, but some of my favorite lines are: 

“You're floundering in your own fabricated self worth.”

“The internet is cool, but it can be a tempting siren of laziness.”

“Never give up, never surrender. Unless you make porno.”

Sultan of Schlock: An interview with Mike Stoklasa 

Mike Stoklasa of GMP Pictures, along with his star performer Rich Evans, have been creating original comedy for over a decade. Mike’s insanely creative editing, filled with jump cuts, slow motion, warped audio and perfect comic timing, has been much imitated by those who’ve seen his many movies, but never duplicated. Although clearly comedies, the films of GMP rarely have jokes in them, making the audience laugh through sheer force of strangeness, and by constantly taking their expectations and subverting them. Mike’s last major release was The Long Walk Home, a brutal spoof of amateur films. 

Mike is very critical of all amateur films and filmmaking, keeping his own library of bad amateur movies, which he often spoofs in his own work. In person Mike comes off as very funny and very depressed. When he’s putting his heart into a project he can release more movies, and release them faster, than seemingly anyone else in the amateur movie world. When he’s unsatisfied with a project, he does nothing and lets the world know … as with the famously unreleased Gorilla Interrupted. He is currently trying to finish up shooting on the relatively expensive talking fruit epic, Oranges: Revenge of the Eggplant. 

Mike Stoklasa: My apartment is cold. 

Jason Santo: Mine too. Mike, you and your production company, GMP Pictures, have been making movies for many years now, resulting in what's been estimated at over 100 original productions. How do you manage such a prolific output? 

Stoklasa: You know... 

Santo: I do? 

Stoklasa: I ask myself that question. How we made like 9 "features" and all those short movies, and I'm not sure. I think the feature films are shitty, that helps. And the shorts are not well put together either so that helps too. GMP has sort of a midas touch of schlock comedy. 

Santo: So do you think quality has been compromised because you've put out so much?

Stoklasa: Depends on the definition of quality. Amateur movies and quality is a fine line. I've seen millions of movies about a guy with a gun, often well-shot but with lame subject matter and horrible acting. You just can't watch it. but they may have spent a year making it. In comparison something we slap together in a day may be funnier and more entertaining. Our features take months, but they look like they took minutes so go figure. Amateur cinema is a dangerous thing. 

Santo: Dangerous? Why? 

Stoklasa: It's now in the hands of illiterate high school kids. Powerful PCs with complex editing capabilities are now in the hands of total morons, and it's sinking us all down like the Titanic.

Santo: Some would argue that the movies are getting better.

Stoklasa: I guess it can be liberating to some, but others will get lazy and want to rush ahead to the "special edition dvd" of the movie shot in their moms back yard. They're missing the point. I'm someone whose first movies were shot in-camera with one take each. I slowly worked up to a computer. I don't know, just seems like people are stupid now. Rushing things and making movies just to make them, not learning the important stuff. There are people who make movies not to make a movie, but to make a box for a movie. Like Guy McConnell. Promotional stuff really pisses me off … 

Santo: Is that because you don't feel you're good at it yourself, or is there something more base in your hatred for it?

Stoklasa: Because there's no point to have a trailer for a 5 minute film. Or a website or a t-shirt, its just self indulgence. It’s not hard to self promote things. It’s just like movies are secondary.

Santo: Part of the movie business is the business end of it. Are you saying people at the amateur level should forsake this?

Stoklasa: Yes, because there shouldn't be a "business" end to amateur movies. Unless you’re really trying to sell the stuff legitimately. Like when Random Foo sold me their compilation of films on the first Foo Base One tape. It was a very slick website, all the movies had titles and their own posters, but the films were just terrible! Like they thought the idea of these movies having titles and posters was cooler than the movies themselves. I paid 12 dollars for the tape, totally insane. There should be a certain level of quality achieved before one makes a theatrical release poster, website, and starts selling a film. It should be something they have worked hard on and invested money and time into, as to not confuse the buyer. 

Santo: So effort comes into play with all of this. In your mind, movies made with little or no effort should not be sold as a movie made by people working hard. 

Stoklasa: I guess. It's not so much about effort as it is about this new fascination with DVDs and all this marketing. It's like Rich said that all these people are just "playing film makers" especially all these new kids. Like these kids that come out and have a poster for a movie thats not even written yet. And they’re saying what will be on the special edition dvd when the movie is done. I’ve seen this many times. What's so special edition about their DVD? They need to focus on making movies, and learning how to work with actors, and what match cuts are, and how to use different shots, and how to record sound, and expose a good picture, and turn off the auto focus, and to move the dog out of the room when they are shooting. Adherence to the most basic rules. Learn moviemaking first. When you are at least competent, then go out and start selling. You can rush a movie all you want...if you know what you're doing. I wrote a feature script for Gorilla Interrupted in 5 hours and we shot the thing in less than 7 days. Granted it didn't turn out the best, but it still had some funny moments, and we got it done. We got shit done from experience. This darn Internet has taken the patience out of people, that’s my only gripe. No matter how many silly promotional things one makes, whether a movie is entertaining or not will always be the final determination.

Santo: So it's not necessarily that people are making "bad" movies that's got you upset, but rather the fact that they seem to be focusing more on the marketing aspect of things and not trying to learn the craft.

Stoklasa: I am made of walnuts. Yes. I love bad movies, I love good movies. I hate mediocre movies where people seemed less concerned about making a movie than they did about telling people they made a movie.

Santo: What is it that you love about making movies?

Stoklasa: The magic of creation. The magic of shooting a scene and then putting all the pieces together, to make it into something. That’s why I love editing so much. Taking what is sometimes junk and turning it into something. That’s why I like the Oranges stuff so much, cause we're making a miniature world and characters out of our voices, styrofoam, fruit, duct tape, wood, plastic, paint ....things that are in our houses everyday, but we take them and mold them and give them life. It's great fun to see that. Then add in sound and music and editing, and you've created a world out of nothing but your own creativity.

Santo: Have you made any movies that you would feel good about marketing and selling?

Stoklasa: I think this new Oranges film will be sellable. I like GMP’s more subversive and weird shorts. They appeal to people on a strange level, but none of that is sellable cause it’s just home movies.

Santo: So if you don't sell your movies, how do you get people to see them?

Stoklasa: Who cares if people see them? So they can say "good job, what’s next?"

Santo: What would be so bad about that? Why make movies if you don't want people to see them?

Stoklasa: I show them to people around me. Friends. Family. They matter. I show ‘em in South Dakota. Some screen name on the Internet doesn't matter to me. We’re trying to make a quality film now we can sell. I feel after all of my work I have finally learned enough to make something good. EVERYTHING before was just practice. And that’s one thing people don't get. They fall in love with their own movies (and themselves) a little too much. NO ONE wants to see you think you're funny acting like a hitman in your own basement. All these movies are just junk. Disposable junk. Everything I've done, up until the point I sell something, is basically, when you boil it down, just junk. The good you get from it is learning the craft a little more each time. They are not movies you make websites for, and posters, and special edition dvds! Not while millions of shot-on-film indie productions are struggling to make it out there. It's all a waste of time. To me amateur movies are really about learning for yourself and exploring your creativity. They’re not paid-for entertainment for other people.

Santo: So what's your advice to someone getting their start with a camcorder and an editing station: make movies, but show them only to friends and family? Don't start a website and create marketing materials until you actually have something good to show?

Stoklasa: It doesn't hurt I guess, but basically yes. Devote your time into getting good at making movies. Learn how to write a good script and so on. Don't rush the film to get it out on the internet. The internet is cool, but it can be a tempting siren of laziness. And if you feel your movies are bad and you're just copying other people, stop making movies and go out and play baseball.

Santo: So you believe the internet is partly to blame with the mediocrity some associate with amateur movies?

Stoklasa: Yes. Yes it is. The internet is hellspawn for movies .... mainly just newbies though. It’s good for people like Timberwolf that have Paypal and want to trick people into ordering their films with pictures of boobs. Because stuff like that is tough to get into stores, the lower lower end of B grade softcore schlock. But to the 15 year old who wants to copy-cat hollywood marketing with his film starring his little brother in a ninja costume... it's a bad thing. Cause the internet gives false hope to him. Back when I'd make a movie like that, people would want to turn it off... so you try to make one better. So your neighbors and relatives would like it. You try harder and harder to get it good; figure out how to put music in, figure out how to do that early chroma key effect so at one point someone would say "wow.” Rewind is a very bad thing cause we just say "good job" to these kids and their shit movies - Rewind is meant to be "supportive" of these kids, when they need to be told they suck so they try harder. They can not be told "good job," cause then they rush into the DVDs, and they think they’re good cause they have a poster that looks just like the one at the local cineplex. Amateur movies are about sucking. It’s the very nature of it. They aren't meant to be seen by human eyes, much less supported. This is where the misconception comes from that I hate amateur movies. I don't. I cherish them. I hate them being marketed or mistaken as Hollywood product. Or mislabeled, misrepresented as what they are : Rough drafts of talent yet to blossom.

Santo: So this odd clash that the amateur movie world is facing between independent cinema and amateur work - it shouldn't be happening?

Stoklasa: Yes. Queequeg Films is one of the few groups that has come the closet to actual marketable product, along with some other films, but 98% of the rest of it isn't marketable or useable in the Indie sense.

Santo: Do you think having an annual festival that invites the public to view amateur pictures is obscuring what amateur cinema is really all about?

Stoklasa: Yes I do. People don't want to admit it, but an amateur film festival is a contradiction. None of it is sellable to a distributor, and the public isn't too interested.

Santo: Some disagree with you on that...

Stoklasa: Mainly Rewinders filled the theater. To some it is entertaining, but to most public they'd spend their time elsewhere. I love Camp Rewind though, for personal reasons. Meeting people, hanging out. Rewind is now that metaphorical "friends and family" I spoke of since we all know each other.

Santo: So showing movies to people at REwind is a good thing. They can offer valuable feedback and help you move forward.

Stoklasa: If they offer that helpful feedback, sure. But people need to be meaner.

Santo: They’re not being truly supportive by just saying "Yes... very good job."

Stoklasa: Correct. I just think that when making a movie, people need to try hard, or don't try at all. 

Santo: So, as you’re working on a movie now that you believe you will be able to sell, will that mean you'll be leaving REwind?

Stoklasa: No. Rewind isn't a house I live in. There is no coming or going. I will always support and be a part of Rewind. Because my film probably won't sell. But Rewind has at least taught me the difference.

Santo: If you were to somehow get the attention of Dreamworks with Oranges 2, and they were to sign you to a picture deal that would bring you millions, what would you do to support amateur moviemaking?

Stoklasa: I would buy Rewindvideo.com and place a picture of a horse on the main page. I would do my best to stop amateur film making. Too many people are doing it now that suck and don't have good ideas.

Santo: But don't you need the bad to appreciate the good?

Stoklasa: No, Confucius. It’s like the Olympics. Olympians are amateur athletes that compete – they are not professionals. We as the public don't need to see the millions of people that tried out for the Olympics running, jumping, and swimming. We just want to see the best of the bunch compete. But the internet has given access to any schlup with a camera to post his filthy shitty movie for all to see, and be annoyed by. Seeing failed wannabe Olympians suck isn't the point of the Olympics, ya dig?

Santo: I do, but how can people get better if they don't mess up to begin with? Failing upwards is necessary to evolving into a better artist. REwind helps foster that, doesn't it?

Stoklasa: No.

Santo: Because it's too busy organizing the "crap" and patting people on the back?

Stoklasa: Yes. It’s not Rewind’s fault. People need to figure this shit out for themselves. People need to say "Gee, this sucks. This is inside jokes. Maybe we shouldn't release this.” Instead it's a race for numbers on how many movies you made. Random Foo has made 198 movies … a new one every second. That makes them the big tops at Rewind. It should be the opposite. Rewind should condemn such activity. Unless none of these people are actually serious about making it in the film industry. Then they can do what they want. 

Santo: I think you're confusing Foo work with my work. I was the one who made too many movies too quickly, and I probably created this image you find so annoying about them... 

Stoklasa: So be it. You see my point though.

Santo: Absolutely. Very clear.

Stoklasa: I think I'll just start making porno. 

Santo: You don't seem to have a problem at all naming names when it comes to backing your points. Do you feel that sort of candor is frowned-upon at REwind?

Stoklasa: Yes. I will be hated. I am hated.

Santo: Does that bother you?

Stoklasa: I shouldn't be hated. This is my opinion. We all can't be people that sit there and congratulate each other and don't have the nerve to speak up. The people in Random Foo are nice people to talk to and so on, but I don't care for their stuff too much, though I did like Inquisition. 

Santo: I still cannot believe you liked Inquisition. Jesus, Mike. You must truly hate the movies I make. Christ. Sometimes you frighten me, Commander. 

Stoklasa: What? 

Santo: It's times like this that I honestly feel like giving up.

Stoklasa: "Times like this?" When you talk to me?

Santo: No... when I think of all of the work I've done, much of it honest, real work that I tried hard to get right... then realize that something I think is shit outshines it in the eyes of people whose opinions I respect. I wonder what the fuck the point is. I wonder if I'm disillusioned. I don't think I have the drive or will to continue with this shit for much longer. I'm tired and sick. After Bent 3, I will consider folding if I see no momentum.

Stoklasa: No! Make a feature! With me and Rich in it! It’ll inject new life and energy into your stuff.

Santo: Gee, Mike. Thanks. That's a huge vote of confidence. J ... you suck on your own. You need me and the mediocre talents of my oddly likeable chubby best-friend to heighten your banal movies. Fuck. Blech. 

Stoklasa: I need the banal serious slick stylings of Senor Santo to make my movies appear less like childish filth and more like quality material! 

Santo: It gets old sometimes, doesn't it? Wanting to succeed at this? I'm only 28 and I feel like an old man.

Stoklasa: I'm 23 and I feel like an old man! Yes. It gets very old. Especially when you're broke.

Santo: I love the fact that a guy who I don't believe is all that great minus his editing skills is telling me what I need to do with my career. That's very interesting.

Stoklasa: Har...you wait and see sucker. I'm a wise man.

Santo: Heh. Indeed, Commander. There is some wiseness there.

Stoklasa: You're foundering in your own fabricated self worth.

Santo: Floundering, you mean? 

Stoklasa: Founder is when a ship sinks. Flounder is when a person is drowning.

Santo: Ahhh...

Stoklasa: Founder - to fill and sink, to fall down or go lame; collapse. Flounder - struggle awkward, proceed with difficulty.

Santo: Mike, you need to have a vision, an idea, a notion, a plan to move ahead in this art. I have it. I'm good at it. I know I am. I believe in my abilities. If that's foundering, then I don't mind because it keeps me working. I do mind, however, when fucking parasites are calling themselves the real deal and others back them. I get ill. You know... I think I was happier when I was away from REwind. I think I better disappear again. I shouldn't be around again. It's making me feel bad.

Stoklasa: No!

Santo: It makes me sick, Mike. It really does. No kidding.

Stoklasa: You can't hide in a cave.

Santo: I can just concentrate on making my movies and living my life away from them.

Stoklasa: Me and Rich dream of the day when we will defeat the evil forces around us.

Santo: Make a good movie and it might happen.

Stoklasa: Never give up, never surrender. Unless you make porno.

Santo: What the shit?

[gyroshrike]

Tell me why you love Gamtav; give me a whole rambling essay if you can. I like seeing people excited over the things and ships they like!

Oh, are you sure you want this? Do you really want to open Pandora's Box? Are you ready for the amount of rambling I can do about GamTav? How much time do you have? Because this is going to be a doozy. I haven't even started writing it and I can tell.

And before I get into it, people gotta know that most of this is based off of pre-murderstuck Gamzee

What do I like about GamTav? What do I like about GamTav??? One of the things that plays into me loving this ship so much is how much I love Gamzee and Tavros as individuals. Whenever I start reading a new piece of media, without question my favorite characters are almost always the really, really nice ones. Boku no Hero Academia? Kirishima. Anohana? Poppo. Legend of Korra? Bolin. And in the beginning of Homestuck, Gamzee and Tavros are just really, really NICE.

Oh, well, Gamzee is really, really nice. When we first see Tavros, he’s being a little shit to the kids, but that's because he was intentionally trying to troll. But once we get into Act 5 and we see Tavros interact with his friends, we realize he's generally a really kind person. His conversations with Nepeta, Gamzee and Aradia are all really sweet. His pesterlog with Vriska, which is the first one we get to see after he is revealed to us as a character, immediately paints a picture of him as someone struggling with his self-esteem and someone who is trying really hard to build himself up as a person. Way to fuckin’ endear me to a character IMMEDIATELY.

For most of the early comic until Act 5, we see all the trolls trolling the kids and even talking shit back and forth to each other. Gamzee was one of the first trolls who we see be purely sweet and supportive to his friends. His first pesterlog after we’re introduced to him is with Karkat and Karkat does nothing but talk shit. xD He does his usual song and dance of saying just the absolute worst things possible in that Karkat way of his and Gamzee just laughs and nods and basically says, “Yeah brother, you go, I love you, you're my best friend.”

We see Gamzee talk with Equius and we already know at this point that Equius is weird, but Gamzee is so jazzed to be talkin’ with his friend. He's just so supportive of Equius and even when Equius tells Gamzee that he must stop doing soper, Gamzee just says, “Okay, sure, you got it, I trust what you're telling me because you're my friend.” Now Equius is not actually ready for Gamzee to listen to him and backtracks and is like, “Wait, no, you don't have to listen to me, let's roleplay instead,” and Gamzee's like, “I don't know how to roleplay, but I'll try for you bro.” He’s just really fucking cute???

Short version: When we meet them, Tavros is someone you want to root for and Gamzee is just the nicest guy on the planet.

Gamzee loves his friends so much and from early on it's made apparent that he wants to love and support them, and would honestly do a lot for them even if he doesn't know what he's doing.

Also along with just being a generally sweet guy Tavros is the nerd archetype I love? He loves the troll equivalent of Pokemon and card games and other things like that. Also he just really loves animals? And I always love the characters who love animals. It's a really big weakness I have. Not to mention, talking with them? That's so COOL? So badass??? Like, UM???? He could control them, but he doesn't like forcing them to do bad things against their will. (Going off of how when suggested he control the imps to defeat them, but feels like that would be unfair/mean.)

SPEAKING OF THE IMPS. Of the twelve trolls, Tavros and Gamzee are the two of them who BEFRIENDED their imps. Isn't that so fucking rad????? They both started off fighting them at first, but then they both later mention that they are able to chill with their imps instead. Gamzee shares pie with them and Tavros communicates with them using his powers. I freaking LOVE that parallel. When I first noticed it I almost keeled over. See, I'm also a sucker for characters who like to attempt peace before conflict, so of course I'm going to love that both of them made friends instead of enemies.

So Act 5 Homestuck has already set me up to basically completely love these two characters. Now, I am a really big shipper. In almost every piece of media I go into I generally come out with ships and that's a big way that I engage with fandom. Now Homestuck, I actually didn't ship that much at first when I first started reading, which is pretty strange for me. I think I just kind of let the ships fall into my lap up until that point. I know my brain had really enjoyed the ideas of Karkat and Terezi, Dave and Terezi, and had even teased inklings of "What if?" and "Oh, I like them," about Rose and Kanaya. But for the most part I wasn't really into Homestuck for shipping at first.

The concept of GamTav, or PBJ as it was more commonly referred to then, was introduced to me by my friends. I had two irl friends who were reading the comic with me and they were ahead of me by some decent amount of pages at the time. At one point they started making references to PBJ and really liking PBJ and I was a little confused because I didn't quite know what they were referring to at first. I learned pretty soon that PBJ was Gamzee and Tavros and I remember being really excited for the ship because it was the first time I'd seen my friends get that excited for a ship. Which is really funny because now in the twilight years of the Homestuck fandom, of the three of us, I'm the only one gripping white-knuckled onto GamTav and breathing it like my life depends on it, while the other two have moved on to much different things. If I'm being honest, I'm pretty sure one of them doesn't even really like Gamzee that much anymore, but respects how much I love him and lets me rant and rave to her about him whenever I want.

It wasn't long after that that I finally got to the infamous "Make out a little" conversation between Gamzee and Tavros. I read the pesterlog and suddenly everything I had seen and heard from my friends made sense. I mean, not that I'm saying that's the ONLY reason GamTav makes sense. I just mean I understood what my friends specifically were talking about. Of the pesterlogs we've seen between them before that, Gamzee and Tavros obviously had a decent friendship. I'm pretty sure in the comic Gamzee was the first person to have a pesterlog with Tavros who is genuinely nice to him. (And this is conversation happens directly after Tavros’ conversation with Vriska, so it’s a wild contrast.) So as a friendship, I was already super down with Gamzee and Tavros-- you know what? Now that I think about it, I feel like I remember in [S] Make Her Pay being disappointed that Gamzee and Tavros were fighting alone and not with each other. Because a lot of the other trolls had paired up to be cool duos, you know? We had Karkat and Terezi, Feferi and Sollux, Nepeta and Equius, and I think I remember being bummed that Gamzee and Tavros weren't paired up. So I, at the very least, think I wanted things for these two even if I hadn't stepped into the realm of actually shipping them yet. I don't remember, this was YEARS ago.

Anyway, the infamous makeout conversation happens, and I'm sold hard for life. I have a lot of other Homestuck ships that I'm into and I enjoy, but none have ever, ever, ever, ever come close to GamTav.

I realize that I've written so much and I still haven't gotten to the meat of why I like them.

So I like ships where the parties involved are best friends. I love it when the characters in a ship are bros who love hanging out, who love doing silly things together. That awesome video "What your favorite Homestuck ship says about you" had me dead to rights. Called me out so hard. My ideal ship dynamic is "being stupid together"? Way to come for the throat. That's exactly it. At their core, Gamzee and Tavros are one of the funnest bro combinations I have ever seen. And what makes them so fun is both of them are huge dorks. HUGE dorks.

When we first meet Gamzee, he stares off into the colors of his miracle modus while making the most ridiculous face, tries to unicycle but just fuckin' pieruettes right off if it because his legs are too short, and just straight up reaches into his modus with his bare hands. Don't even get me started on how he scares himself with his own horns. That shit kills me.

We've already talked about how Tavros is a huge nerd, so that's covered. But like… have you heard him rap? This guy just gets so into it and has so much fun while simultaneously sounding so silly. He's flirty and awkward and ridiculous and has this shit eating grin on all the time.

They are those two friends who get up to shenanigans where everyone else around them just kind of shakes their head and thinks that they're so dumb (in an affectionate way), but they don't care because all they DO care about is how much fun they're having together.

One of my favorite things about Homestuck in general is it lets its characters be bad at things. John and Karkat suck at coding. Gamzee, Tavros, and Dave are bad at rapping. Rose becomes a prolific author, but I would argue she's bad at writing when she's 13 because, wow is it a slog to get through her wizard fanfiction LMAO.

And GamTav is a perfect example of two people who just have fun together being bad at things together. There's no pretense of needing to be cool or needing to be good at something or any type of shame or embarrassment. They're just so silly and they don't mind being silly around each other and they never make the other person ashamed of who they are. We even see some of that last bit in the comic. Gamzee never puts Tavros down. In one conversation, he acknowledges Tavros' disability, but doesn't taunt Tavros for it, doesn't make it a joke, or make him feel bad. It's just acknowledged and then they move on. Then Tavros mentions that while he doesn't share Gamzee's religious or spiritual views, he is supportive of them. I am such a sucker for shit like that.

In every way, shape, and form, Gamzee and Tavros are supportive of each other and just and totally uplift the other person. Both of these characters go through so much verbally (both jokingly and maliciously) at the hands of their peers for being who they are that Gamzee and Tavros' conversations were so refreshing to just see them be unabashedly themselves with another person.

And they make each other happy! Tavros' first conversation with Gamzee was the first time we see where Tavros is purely elated to be talking to the person he is talking to. And Tavros obviously makes Gamzee really happy. They just make each other so happy! And I love that shit!

Gamzee is, without restraint, supportive of everything that is Tavros. Gamzee is the type of person who would look at anything Tavros wants to do or is trying to do and put his whole heart in supporting Tavros and telling him, "Yeah bro, you can do this, you're amazing, I love you, go get 'em, you're the best, you can do anything you put your mind to,” and I love that for Tavros.

Gamzee was the friend I spent all of Homestuck wishing Tavros had. Tavros spent so much time talking to Vriska, interacting with Vriska, adventuring with Vriska. And that entire time I was just wishing that Gamzee was there instead, just so Tavros would have someone to be nice to him.

After murderstuck, I spent years waiting for Gamzee and Tavros to meet in a dream bubble. That was all I wanted. I wanted Gamzee to have to look Tavros in the eye and face what he had done, own up to everything to the person he loved most in the world. But of course, post murderstuck, Gamzee gets everything stripped away from him that made him the character he was in the beginning. It wasn't even a satisfying villain arc! It was just confusing! I feel like I could have dealt with it if Gamzee was a well-rounded villain. But instead his entire villain shtick was just surrounded by a bunch of question marks! I spent all of Homestuck waiting to learn what exactly was going on with Gamzee and then we never got that and that fucked me up.

And of course, oh, of course, up until the very end of the series, in the very, very, very last animation we ever see, Homestuck Act 7, Tavros is standing by Vriska's side, as he has had to do since the very beginning.

I haven't read the epilogues or Homestuck 2, so I'm not going to touch on anything that happens in those series and I would appreciate it if no one responded to this with spoilers. Don't even tell me things like, "Oh, you'll like Gamzee," or "Oh, you'll hate Gamzee," or anything like that. I don't want any hints. I already got enough. I want to form my own opinion when I finally get the energy to go in.

Nowadays, I stick almost exclusively to humanstuck AU's for my GamTav. Because even if canon GamTav wasn't so sad and depressing, there are other things that make me way too sad to think about. As a bronze blood, Tavros's lifespan is going to be significantly shorter than Gamzee's. No matter the good or bad context surrounding their relationship. Even if they were the perfect, fluffy, happy couple in canon, I can't deal with that lifespan difference. It breaks my goddamn heart.

I live in a world where I can rewrite the circumstances surrounding these characters and make it play out in a way that is much more to my liking. Writing them in humanstuck AU's lets me take away all of the things that make my heart hurt and instead repurpose them for really meaningful, emotional character building arcs and that's my main focus when it comes to GamTav.

Something I'm also really picky with when it comes to this ship is that I need the core of Gamzee and Tavros' character growth to happen apart from each other. I have found that I don't like stories that center Gamzee and Tavros or their relationship as the pivotal point of their development. I don't like when Gamzee is the pillar of Tavros' confidence. I do like when Gamzee helps out building Tavros' confidence by being supportive and saying nice things and encouraging him, but I don't like it when he is the main source. I don't want Tavros' growth to be hinged on Gamzee being in his life.

The same goes for Gamzee. I don't like stories where Tavros is the one thing keeping Gamzee from doing bad things. I don't like when their relationship is framed as being the one thing keeping Gamzee from going murder mode all over his friends again. I've read fics where Gamzee struggles either with murderous instincts as a troll or mental health as a human and Tavros is one of the only things that keeps him from going off the deep end. I don't like that. I want Gamzee's growth to be primarily on his own or at the very least not supported by his romantic partner. Of course, I love it when Tavros is there when he needs him to hold him or soothe him or say kind things or help him through his struggles. I'm not saying I don't want Tavros to comfort him at all or ever, I just don't want Tavros to be his sole anchor.

I just love idiot best friends in love.

Oh, OH! ALSO. Gamzee doesn’t give a FUCK about the hemospectrum. One of the first things he says to Equius is how he doesn’t get it, how he’s not better than anyone else, how he doesn’t even know how to ACT better than anyone else. How am I not supposed to love that?

Opposite sides of the hemospecturm relationships are so fun. I love the idea of Gamzee entering a room full of strangers and them being like “Oh no! :O !!!! Scary subjuggulator!!” and Tavros comes rushing over all happy and excited and they just snuggle all cute and gross and everyone watching’s jaw just drops.

This might sound weird, but I also think one of the things that endear me to characters is them getting misinterpreted and then me having fun drawing them more ‘accurately’? Tavros is so often depicted as uwu soft weepy boi and I love drawing him with a mischievous grin just as ready to do something stupid and get himself into trouble as Gamzee is. Equius TOLD Tavros not to go near the stairs with his new robo legs. What is one of the things Tavros does immediately? Go try the fuckin’ stairs. And he KEEPS DOING IT.

*lays down on the floor* I just… I just want domestic GamTav where they move into a nice wheelchair accessible home (modified in a similar way to Tavros' hive in Pesterquest) and Gamzee massages Tav's back when it aches and tells him he's the light of his life and in turn Tavros holds Gamzee close on his darker days and Tavros kisses his hands and brushes his hair out of his eyes and boops his nose and they laugh so hard together that they cry.

[instasiswetrust]

Steve's not quite drunk but there's a pleasant buzz under his skin that leaves him feeling pliant and loose, enough to keep any unsavory thoughts at bay for the time being.

The scent of chlorine and bleach that envelops him once he opens the pool doors, familiar comforts by now, help clear some of the haze of alcohol that has befallen him from his last drink taken at the Auris that night. Or morning. He's not entirely sure.

It brings back the memories that he had been trying so hard to forget. A lavender envelope had been in his mail that day, inside of it an invitation trimmed with delicate filigree. For Nancy's and Jonathan's wedding.

A fall wedding.

The type which he and Nancy had joked about back when they were together, not long before Jonathan had joined them.

He had gone through his work with the kind of detachment that usually meant nothing was truly registering. Adam might have noticed at one point, too attuned already to the tells under the porcelain of Steve's mask, but the memory is fuzzy and he can't remember if he ever gave a proper answer to his manager's concerned query.

As soon as work was done, he had made his way to the Auris in search of something to get his mind off the pain that clutched the shards of his heart like a vice. Or rather, someone. It had been his favorite dancer's day off or something though, leaving him to spend the rest of his night watching the dancers on stage and sipping on the ocassional drink.

Something had made him want to climb the stairs to the gym's pool, though. And that's why he was here now.

"Are you drunk?" The voice that speaks has become familiar in the same way the scent and sounds of the pool has and when he looks up to meet the eyes of its owner, he finds them startled if slightly amused.

"Only a little bit." He shrugs, plopping down by the edge of the pool with his legs crossed under him. The bleach might leave stains on his Levi's but he can't really muster enough energy to give a fuck right now. "'s not that bad."

"You kind of reek of cigarette smoke and whiskey."

Yep. Definitely amused.

"Spilled some scotch on my shirt. The smoke is probably from the cab driver." Another shrug but this time he levels Billy with apologetic doe eyes. "I can leave if it bothers you."

"You're fine, I was just curious." The blonde swims closer, crossing his arms over the edge next to where Steve sits once he's close enough. "First time I've seen you up here wearing something other than your ridiculous pajamas."

"They are not ridiculous!" Steve protests at once, pouting. "And you have seen me in swimwear too!"

"Last week you were wearing bright red shorts that said Bite Me across the ass, and a t-shirt that said Friends don't lie in big bold letters with a heart-shaped waffle at the center." Billy deadpans, raising a single eyebrow. "The shirt was at least two sizes too big for you."

"They were gifts." Brown eyes narrow into a glare but the petulant pout kind of offsets the vibe.

"I thought models were supposed to have taste in clothes."

"We're supposed to look pretty while others dress us. It's not in the job description to have taste."

"So you admit you have no taste then." Billy was giving him that smirk, the one Steve called insufferable but discretly considered hot as fuck. How dare he be so sinfully handsome.

"I said no such thing!" Steve crosses his arms over his chest, tipping his chin up in the perfect picture of snotty petulance. He could already feel the laughs bubbling in his chest, wanting to break the mock facade.

It takes only a second or two of Billy giving him an skeptical look before they are both laughing.

He had missed this kind of easy-going banter. Most of his friends he only saw around the holidays, and the environment at work was more prone to talks about weight loss and botox than anything else.

New York never slept but that only made it all the more lonely.

His sullen mood must've reflected on his face because he feels something poke at his thigh, meeting Billy's eyes when he turns to look at him.

"You didn't just come here so I could make fun of your taste in clothes, did you?"

"I-"

It's only then that Steve realizes Billy is right.

The reason his alcohol fogged brain has preferred to come up here rather than crash into his bed wasn't just some way of punishing himself even further. Not entirely at least. He had come here because it was a place of comfort for him.

And because he had a friend here, too.

"No. Not just that." Steve sighs, letting his eyes focus on the slow movement of the pool water instead of Billy's face.

"Do you..." A moment of hesitation, as if he's not sure about his words. "want to talk about it?"

Brown eyes close, keeping his focus on the in and out of air through his lungs for a few moments until he feels less like he's going to burst out crying the moment he sets these awful thoughts into words.

Makes them all the more real.

"My... exes. They are getting married. To each other." He doesn't open his eyes, doesn't do anything more than try to keep his voice steady even as the aching pain of heartbreak weighs down on his chest. "I received the invitation this morning."

There's a low whistle. It sounds like sympathy. It sounds real.

"That bites," Billy says, and his voice has a dulled edge to it. Commiseration with flavor, or something like that, but it's three am and there's nothing but cold tile and the soft wake of lit water. "Is this ... like a sudden spur of the moment thing?"

When Steve turns doe eyes to him, Billy raises up his hands, only moderately pruned, in an easing gesture.

"You don't have to answer. Just..." A pause. A beat as the swimmer looks for the right string of words. "Just trying to gauge how much of a dick move this is."

There's a laugh, dull and mirthless. A sad little sound.

“We have been friends since high school. All three of us dated for a bit longer after that. We went through some hard stuff together back in Indiana.” He shrugs, keeping his eyes closed. Tears at bay. “Was supposed to be the kind of friendship that lasted even after we broke up.”

It’s all my fault. He doesn't say.

My stupid heart and I. We ruined it all.

It takes a split second of contemplation, because, after all, they're total strangers. But once upon a time, someone gave Billy this sideways kindness and it helped. Maybe Steve and his overly fancy hair won't mind it too much.

So Billy acts on the impulse.

It's a tiny splash. Really very minuscule. Aimed and precise for the minimum impact upon the sitting duck target. But water is water. Nobody can tell tears from pool water.

"You were thinking too hard." He places the excuse on the table, sinking lower into the water, comfortable in this strange company. Even if the guy seems to be at the end of his rope. There's something about him. Like a dream you don't want to forget. "I could see the smoke. Had to cool you down."

The water is warm and yet is still enough of a shock to force Steve's eyes to open.

His first instinct is to protest, say something about the action being rude and uncalled for. Stand up and leave, most likely.

But what he sees in Billy's face — hears in his voice — is enough to give him a moment's pause. To truly appreciate the action for the small kindness it is.

This time when the tears dribble down his cheeks in quiet drops, he has something to hide them behind.

“You really think you're funny, huh?”

And if his voice is a little too wet to be considered normal, they don't have to talk about it.

"I'm hilarious," Billy says as he sinks a little lower into the water, mostly to hide his smug grin, but in part to hide away. "The girl gang that lets me tag along sometimes says so."

“Of course you are.” Steve rolls his eyes, using his fingers to brush back his mostly dry hair. He should probably wash the chlorine out of his hair before going to bed or it would be stiff come morning.

“Is that why you're trying to become a prune? For maximum fun effect?”

“Nah,” Billy waves off the prune comment. He’s hardly started his routine. Pool time ain’t over until everything has that post-workout burn and his stomach begs for food. Makes time easier to keep that way. “I just like to swim.”

Just like Tony Hawk likes to skateboard, he supposes, but understating his profession like this is one of the best parts of the job. Gotta get your kicks when you find them.

“Why? Got something against prunes?” He laughs, “They just want to help you. Healthy stomach, and all.”

“Not particularly, but they do remind me of my Nonna. She likes her prunes.” Another shrug, this time easier. Easy banter is much better than worrying about that little envelope sitting on his coffee table.

The tears have stopped too, the contacts itching slightly against his eyes. Probably from the mix of salt and chlorine. Thankfully, his cardigan is mostly dry and he takes it off to use it as a makeshift towel.

“Is that why you're always here at weird hours? You some sort of pool cryptid or something?”

“That’s only step one of my master plan.”

Billy likes the sound of pool cryptid. Sounds a lot more mysterious and fun than what he’s actually doing, which is training until he drops so the nightmares won’t kick up.

A snort, loud and sudden leaves Steve at that, straining a little in his throat. Mom would say it's undignified. Dad would say it's ugly. He doesn't particularly care either way.

“And pray tell, what would step two entail? Flooding the city?”

Cute laugh, Billy thinks briefly surprised. Much better than seeing the guy choke back tears. Let's see if he can't instigate a bit more of that amusement. It's bound to taste better than the misery the brunette wanted to wallow in.

"What kind of water-based supervillain do you take me for?" Billy, mock-miffed, places a hand over his heart and huffs. "That's so silver-age comics. And you're not even my henchman. Why should I tell you anything about my master plan?"

A finger taps at his chin, seemingly thinking hard about his answer. Steve's not particularly well versed in comics but Dustin’s done his best to keep him on the smallest of loops.

He no longer mixes Superman with Captain America, at least.

“Fair point. You don't have the looks to pass off as Aquaman.” Steve purses his lips, offering his best apologetic doe-eyed look. Although he's definitely bluffing because if there's anybody out there who could give Aquaman a run for his money it would be Billy. “And who says I couldn't be your henchman?”

"Did you fill out the paperwork?"

Everyone knows bureaucracy is the lungs of evil. Or something like that. Sue him, he was never great with metaphors on the fly.

“Honey, if I wanted to fill paperwork I wouldn't have taken modeling as a career.”

It's an exaggeration for the most part. Steve's too used to poking fun about himself these days that it doesn't sting as bad as it used. Not too much.

Billy cocks his head and lets the loaded sentence drop and drift away.

"Then guess you can't be a henchman."

“I can make killer margaritas, though.”

“I don’t really drink too much.” The nightmares get worse when he’s anything but sober. It’s better to be exhausted. It’s the easiest way. “Medication reasons.”

A little white lie that’s hardly a lie, he really shouldn’t drink with his ADHD meds, but who ever listens to that rule? Nah. Only when it suits him.

“Model thing explains your hair though. Glad we solved that mystery.”

“Fair.” Steve offers a smile, crooked and a little pinched at the edges but a smile nonetheless. “I’m not supposed to either. Nutritionist's orders.”

To be fair, he's not supposed to be drinking at all. Smoking too. It's a little hard not to indulge every once in a while, though.

The model comment surprises him. There's a billboard with his face just a few blocks down from this apartment complex. He can see it from his room. How has this guy not recognized him?

It's surprisingly refreshing.

“Hm? Oh no, the model thing has nothing to do with my hair. That's just personal taste.”

Now that Billy cares to look, Steve’s face is achingly familiar. Oh, the trials and tribulations of having attention issues. At least there’s a better reason for the weird familiarity than must just have one of those faces.

“Can’t relate.” He’s not particularly attached to any bodily feature of his. It’s a side effect, he’s told. Reassured. It's just a consequence, and nothing more. “Doing things with hair? Nah. Sounds too complicated.”

“Sounds like the kind of thing a pool cryptid would say.” There’s a story behind Billy's words. Something missing, hidden skin deep. Steve hopes the light jab helps diffuse that somewhat.

“What are you, a cop?” Billy smirks, and because he is the pinnacle of maturity, he dips under the water with an obnoxious splash.

“Asshole” Steve hisses, droplets dribbling down his bangs and into the cardigan bunched up in his lap.

With a sigh, he forces himself to get up. Might as well take that shower now.

Billy surfaces, still grinning, because even if the guy looks pissed at him, that means he’s not stewing in the past with his soon-to-be-married exes and the Hercules-class weight of baggage that relationship caused.

“Guys by the pool get splashed. No matter what time it is or how cute they are. Cryptid rules.” His smirk it's wide, tip of his tongue between his teeth. "If you weren’t prepared to get wet, then why’d you come?”

Steve shrugs, doing his best to ignore that peek of a pink tongue. “The local cryptid makes for good conversation.”

“So you’ve been watching me?” Billy makes a little show of floating back, caught in thought. “I don’t know how I feel about spectators.”

“I can stop.” Painfully honest. If Billy really wants him to, Steve would stop. He would prefer not to, though.

“Nah. I’m only pulling your leg.” Billy returns to the pool’s edge. Rests his cheek on the edge, looking up at pretty boy model Steve.

“Things get too quiet sometimes.”

Steve hums softly in agreement, feeling relief ease itself back into his bones. He would have stopped, yes, but he wouldn't have particularly liked the prospect of it.

“You come here every day? Or have I just happened to stumble in on the days you're around?”

"Almost every day. Sometimes I take this side-show to other pools." Billy cracks his best Han Solo roguish smile, levies it against Steve's still too flat smile. "Gotta keep the government guessing sometimes, you know."

“Of course, wouldn't want to get caught and all that.” A yawn gets past Steve's lips, startling him. He hadn't registered how tired he was. “I’ll keep that in mind, for next time.”

“Thank you.” Quieter. Softer. Barely above a whisper but loud enough in the gentle silence of the pool.

It comes just as soft. It's almost tender, really, as the word casts across the water and tile and the near-lonely pool.

"Anytime."

---

The next time Steve visits, it's once again 3 AM but he makes the mistake (is it really a mistake?) to bring a tin of sugar cookies with him.

"Oh shit, are you sharing, or is this all to tease me?"

Steve is sitting by one of the benches, already halfway through a cookie. “Come out here and find out.”

Billy narrows his eyes, lips pulled into a thin frown.

"Fool me once." He waggles a single warning finger and doesn't even really bother to dry off as he drags himself out of the pool to plop down on the floor next to Steve and steal into the snacks.

There are enough cookies for both of them stuffed neatly in a tin container. It's awfully pretentious according to Dustin, but then again Steve's Nonna always said cookies tasted better stored that way.

“I'm not mean enough to just eat while you watch. Yet, at least.”

"Oh just wait until you know me better." Billy chirps, shoving two into his mouth, wholesale and choking a bit.

"Robin and Carol would do that in a heartbeat."

“They probably would have a good reason too.” Steve teases, watching with amused eyes as Billy almost chokes. They are just sugar cookies he managed to scrounge up with whatever was in his kitchen. Nothing that good.

“Easy there tiger, cookies ain't going anywhere.”

"You have no idea how hungry I always am."

Steve blinks, surprised. The words come out before he has a chance to truly think them over. “I’m a good cook.”

"Prove it." It's out of Billy's mouth before he can take it back, but on second thought, he doesn't really want to. Steve's good company, or at least he has been so far.

And he hasn't had a nightmare since.

Good omens.

“You're kind of choking on the proof right now.” Maybe it comes out a little lighter, a little too surprised.

That's fine. Whatever this thing is, it doesn't seem like too bad of a chance to take.

“But if you need some more convincing, I can offer dinner too.”

Wheezing, but recovering, Billy grins up at Steve but there's a hopeful spark in his blue eyes that wasn't there before. "Fuck yeah, gotta make sure it's not a fluke."

Steve offers him the thermos of coffee he had brought with him, suddenly too distracted by watching Billy drink to remember what he wanted to ask. “Uh... When are you free?”

"This Sunday, I think. Getting back from a rapids trip that I shouldn't keep doing but like fuck am I gonna listen to other people for something dumb like my health."

“Is it like, you could die type of thing or just one of those things doctors say we should stop doing and everyone ignores? Because dead people don't particularly eat.”

"I do dumb shit because regular training gets boring and people who actually like me have to put up with it." Billy waves a dismissive hand. "But that's what it takes to get me moving on schedule so. Yeah."

It drives his coach insane because doing his reps in real rivers with real currents isn't exactly... well. It's not what everyone else does for training and given that he has passed out mid-stroke before, he can't even say the risk is just the current. But he knows that upstate rivers like the back of his hand.

Yeah, life would be way easier if he didn't have ADHD, less doctor's notes for the cause of amphs in his piss, but it would also be super boring and he'd be even more traumatized, probably. And that would suck.

Steve thinks of Indiana, and a bat full of nails. Of cliff diving at the quarry, drunk on stolen bourbon and tasting cheap cigarettes. Of the Auris with his slew of dancers most of who he's shared a bed with more than once.

He thinks he has some experience with the whole doing dumb shit just to get his schedule moving.

"I will take your word for it then." Hums, thinking back to his schedule and what he has paged in for Sunday. There was that casting thing Adam wanted him to do but it was morning. "I should be free on Sunday. Any allergies I should account for?"

“None that I know of.” Spoken cheerfully

“Great. Gives me more to work with.” And this time when he smiles, it's the most honest he's offered since they met.

---

When he finds it again, it is entirely on accident.

Adam had scheduled a trip to California for a gig, something about a new summer line of wetsuits and surfboards this company wanted him to advertise. It was a big opportunity and it was good cash too, of course so Steve wasn't going to question why they thought it a good idea to present a summer line in the middle of august. But as usual, he had forgotten to pack his suitcases until the night before, and now he was left to scramble around his apartment searching for his stuff.

So when he finds the lavender envelope buried under a few recipe books and a hoodie, still unopened, he doesn't think much about it and opens it. It's only when he's staring at the date stenciled in black calligraphy under Nancy's and Jonathan's name that he realizes what he's looking at.

Oh right. Those two were getting married.

The familiar ache in his chest is still there, but it's muted enough that he's surprised. Between canceling his exclusive membership at the Auris, and his relationship with Billy coming out to the media, he had sort of forgotten all about the wedding.

Maybe...

Grabbing his phone from the bed, he shoots his boyfriend a quick text.

How do you feel about being my plus one to my exes' wedding?

[fanficsandfluff]

The Snyder Cut: Headcanons (mostly of the tickly nature)

Bruce Wayne (Batman) ~ Batfleck, my love

He’s such a lover boy, and I can say that though I don’t exactly know how to explain what I mean. You just gotta understand.

He cares so strongly about EVERYONE. e v e r y o n e. Alfred, fucking loves the guy, jokes with him. The fucking “This is Alfred, I work for him.” MY MAN, STOP!

I think he just really wants to get along with everyone and wants everyone to get along in general.

But he lowkey crushes on Diana (at least in his mind, he’s keeping it lowkey, but we all see what’s happening)

I love the idea of this big hunk of a man getting soft with someone like Diana. 

She makes him genuinely laugh this one time by saying something funny, and then they’re both laughing together. 

Bruce definitely has one of those laughs where he throws his head back and shit and you can see his like Adam’s apple bobbing and everything.

But that’s if he’s really laughing.

And he has loud “HA”’s that are like really short but loud and then he kinda just snickers to himself for a while, holding his stomach.

And dude, the scene in freaking uhh… i think it’s BvS I’m not 100% (maybe i fucking imagined it who knows) where she like comes over to him and is fixing his wound….. tickle scenario hand picked from the gods right there

I can see a whole, “Woah!” from Bruce when Diana traces her fingers on some sensitive skin. And that Gal Godot smile is on her in an INSTANT. 

Bruce will laugh if he’s with the right person. Like I headcanon that if he’s being tickled, he will laugh if it’s done by Diana or Barry, then like he’ll be forced to laugh if it’s Clark bc he overpowers the poor bat, but then he just has these hilarious bouts of angry growls and chuckles if Arthur is going after him. 

I can’t even write about Batfleck being a ler because I will literally explode, so I’m done here 

(((((butseriouslyifanyonewantstotalklerbatfleckwithmehmuplz)))))

Diana Prince (Wonder Woman) 

I know the GIF isn’t from ZSJL but just let me live, ok? (Also I couldn’t find the one of Gal wiggling her fingers YOU KNOW THE ONE I’M TALKING ABOUT)

First off, Gal is the most horrible queen of giggles. I’ve seen those blooper reels. My god, girl, how do you keep getting hired?

SHE HAS SUCH A BIG SMILE IT’S LIKE THE ROCK IDK HOW THEIR TEETH AND MOUTH GET SO WIDE LOOKING

Diana will start tickle fights without a doubt.

She’s already very trustful and I also feel pretty handsy with people, especially those she may feel close to. So if she’s playful, you best watch out.

Her favorite targets are Bruce and Barry. I will not take criticism. Diana attacking Barry and reducing him to panicky shrieky laughs is my #1 thought. It’s not even living rent free, I’m commissioning it to be there.

Diana is one to laugh with her victims. She will wreck them and have a great time doing so. 

She’ll be ticklish if she wants to be, but it isn’t often she gets pinned and tickled or anything like that.

The guys try to stay away from her or not go after her with tickles for fear of retaliation.

AQUAMAN, CYBORG, SUPERMAN, AND THE FLASH UNDER THE CUT

Arthur Curry (Aquaman)

So…. my man isn’t really ticklish. I really don’t think he is, I feel like his Atlantean genes make his skin a special kind of hard, if that makes sense?

THAT BEING SAID ARTHUR IS THE BIGGEST LER OMGGG

He’ll try and act all cool and ‘whatever’ around the League cuz that’s kind of his persona.

But he slowly gets to like them more and more and his playful side starts to come out.

He’ll tickle Barry out of pure annoyance. Like if Barry makes any kind of comment, he’ll just point his finger out and get that glint in his eye and Barry is sprinting for the hills.

Here’s my favorite headcanon: Arthur will tickle Bruce because he knows it pisses him off when he does it. Bruce will fight back and keep Arthur in his sights at all time and curse and growl at him. And Arthur thinks it’s hilarious.

Arthur as a ler will taunt and tease until the cows come home

“Huh, big guy? What’s that? Ahawww that’s what I thought!... Not so fast/tough/etc. now!... I will wreck you.”

Victor Stone (Cyborg)

Unfortunately… not ticklish. :(

But this boy has the sweetest laugh you will ever hear, and I will die on that hill. 

Now that he has friends (superpowered friends, no less), he can slowly come alive and be himself. 

I can see Victor not getting involved in tickle fights at first, but at a certain point he’ll be all like, “Okay, step aside so we can do this right” and just PIN THE SHIT OUT OF WHOEVER IS BEING TICKLED. His extra robot arms are killer!

Okay, when he laughs for the first time in front of the group, there’s that cliche moment of pause where everything stops and everyone just stares and listens to him. It’s so rare to hear him laugh because the poor kid barely even smiled around them in the beginning. 

He SMIRKS

Now hear me out on this…

Okay, so half a face. Great. Weird. We love it. But you can see all of mischievous Victor when the guy SMIRKS. You see his eye squint and you can swear his robot eye gets a gleam of a different color. 

Wait honestly as I was writing that, the thought of Victor’s eye and like his apparatus changing color based on his mood is golden.

Me sitting here, lowkey wishing Victor’s robot body had some kind of cuddly mode like Baymax lmfaoooo 

Like the defense mode his body went into when he was around resurrected Supes, but for cuddles and being cute.

Clark Kent (Superman)

I was debating even including any headcanons for Superman bc I don’t care about him much, honestly.

I am v happy they kept in the whole ‘him staring at Flash through the speed storm’ scene bc I laughed so hard at that the first time i saw Josstice League in the theater. 

Also I didn’t really like the black superman costume??? I’m not a comic buff, so I’m assuming that’s why. I am like the one person who missed the color from the Josstice League cut. Don’t miss the stupid red sky in the finale, but I miss every other ounce of color that was just SUCKED right out of the Snyder Cut.

Clark and Bruce are besties now, I don’t make the rules. Bruce bought the man his house back. By buying the bank. He’ll take care of him.

And I’ve always simped for those two ever since BvS, bc I’ve already written like two fics where they tickle each other. 

Clark overpowering Bruce to tickle the shit out of him makes me so happy lol. Big strong boy Batfleck looking thiccc over here… but put him against Superman and he’s donezo. Because as mentioned earlier, I do think Bruce is pretty ticklish. 

But Clark can have his lee side when he’s feeling nice

He’s got that mighty chuckle, almost like how Thor might laugh. 

And he really likes getting involved in tickle fights with the League. He knows all of them are sorta afraid of him on the daily anyway, but have that power added to a tickle fight and it’s fun as hell. 

He’s gotten taken down by them ONCE. And I mean exactly (1) O N C E.

They all teamed up. Bing, bang, boom. Pinned him to the floor and they each took an area of skin and fucking SQUEEZED AND WIGGLED. They were trying to incapacitate him as quickly as possible. And dangummit, he laughed a lot! Like Clark realized just how ticklish he could feel if he wanted to feel it. 

And don’t even get me started on Lois, he’s big on getting her to giggle and she likes toying with him and running her hands all over his body (bc who wouldn’t?)

Barry Allen (The Flash)

I waited to write about Barry last because I have so much to say about this character....

and then I fell asleep and waited until the next day to write anything down about him so now I’m totally not in the mood and I forgot all the salient points I was planning on making.

fuck you, michelle.

I got a weird relationship with this character. He was mad annoying in the Josstice League. Thank goodness they trimmed his bad jokes down.

But now....

when he got hurt at the end and he was like crying and shit oh my god I wanted to hug him

His character got so... good

And I’m now at the right age where I can think about myself in a relationship with this character with no changes or shame

We both out here trying to find that one good job after college and everything

BARRY JUST WANTS FRIENDS, GUYS

HE’S THAT CUTE

And then he got this whole found family schtick with the Justice League!!! Lookit him!!! Thriving!

He has total little brother energy

like, pesky little brother. Bothers everyone, looks over people’s shoulders while they’re deep in thought or concentrating on something.

Asks a lot of questions.

All the more reason for the gang to want to tickle the shit out of him.

Barry just reads like a super ticklish lee. Like his whole character.

Maybe touch starved because he said he needed friends, and I don’t think he has siblings??? (sorry if i’m wrong about that, comic fans)

I already named some of my fav headcanons about him getting tickled by like Diana and such, and I’m sticking with it.

Barry does flee. He runs away with super speed.... but sometimes he just kinda wants the tickles so he lets them have at him. 

The chase is all part of the fun with tickling Barry, though. That’s what makes it so entertaining. And Barry isn’t afraid to be a little shit about it either. He will super-speed around his pursuers and poke their sides and tickle them back really quickly before they even know what’s happening. 

Barry doesn’t exactly hold back his laughter lol. He’ll protest and scream and squirm like crazy, but once he’s actually tickled, he loses it.

Pure boy. With funny ass facial expressions.

And it really doesn’t help that I never realized just how hot Ezra Miller is, even though I heard he’s not a great person irl. Oh well.

THAT’S ALL FOLKS!

Please please let me know if y’all have things to add, to squee over, to question me about... please. anything. i’m here for you. thanks for reading, guys!

[wesavegotham]

(hi I'm sorry if this bothers you but I really need to vent)

I have completely given up on dc doing damian justice like he is my favorite character I want to see more of him but not like what's been happening teen titans and such he is such a complex character and has so much potential for good stories but his stories are only about shifting between his father's or mother's side again and again like maybe instead of sending him on another mission to "humble" him maybe dc could actually explore his character how he deals with what happened in the league with him , the vast skills he has at his disposal, his intelligence , his compassion and empathy maybe just going on a journey for himself to find what he wants to do instead of honoring one side of his family

(I'm sorry for this being so long I'm emotional and just want my baby to be really happy and get a win for once🥺)

Teen Titans destroyed so much, Damian's character developement, all his relationships, my goodwill, my trust in DC as a whole...

On some level I get it if Williamson thinks he needs to put Damian through all his previous character developement again because TT threw it all away, he said in an interview that he doesn't just want to "flip a switch", but Teen Titans didn't give a damn about making Damian's descent into darkness believable either and no other storyline deals with the fallout of what happened in TT, so why don't we just flip the freaking switch and give Damian all his developement back right now?

Of course so far we only have Robin #1 to analyse, so there is still some time to prove me wrong, but to me it seems like Williamson wants to focus more on Damian's weaknesses rather than his strengths. And no, I'm not just basing this on how Bruce introduces Damian to new readers on the first few pages.

What kind of character developement arcs does Williamson set up for Damian in Robin #1?

Who is Damian?

It's what the hallucination of Alfred asks Damian and the manga Damian reads before that moment is very on the nose with its "you have to find your own way and stop only following your mentors/parents" message.

That is probably also why Williamson thought it was necessary to have Damian arrogantly announce to all the fighters who he is related to and thus the best, and why Damian suffered a pretty embarrassing defeat at the hands of Flatline. More on that later.

Damian defining himself through his family and the question who he is on his own is a running theme with Damian, you had it in Batman and Robin 2009 and 2011 when Damian ended up rejecting Talia/the league of assassins and chose to be Robin and part of the batfamily, he even died in attempt to convince Bruce that he was a hero; you had it in Robin: Son of Batman when Damian said he was a Wayne first and an al Ghul second, but also realized that he had found a second family with Goliath and Maya and that being Robin was his redemption; you had it a bit in Super Sons when Jon told Damian that doing good is not just Bruce winning against Talia, it's Damian's choice and thus his win. You even had it in Teen Titans, just that now he was rejecting everything about Batman and leaned more on the side the league of assassins while yelling about how this was "his own way" for some reason.

Because it's a running theme with Damian I guess I can't really fault Williamson for trying to give us his own two cents on the topic, but I don't think one can fault me either for wishing we could finally see something new and different being explored that is not about what side he's on. It's hard to care about the answer, no matter what it is, because chances are the next writer is not going to care about the new answer and will try to answer this question again. I would rather see Damian have some fun as a hero and Robin in peace for once instead of constantly seeing him ask himself who he is and if he's a hero or not. Even a running theme of a character can get tiring if it's overdone.

The second arc this first issue set up for Damian is about him not understanding that losing is normal and necessary.

Bruce talks about how Damian doesn't understand how losing and facing challenges made Bruce what he is today and that topic comes back around in Damian's fight against Flatline.

Her whole thing is that she contrasts Damian because she learned from people that lost while he "only learned from people that never truly tasted defeat" and she proves her way of thinking superior by easily deafeating and killing Damian.

I personally feel like this is a very forced and stupid arc for Damian that doesn't fit what Damian has been going through these past few years. Damian knows quite well that Bruce loses, his whole tantrum in Teen Titans was about him feeling like Bruce's way of doing things was not achieving anything, like they were losing the war against crime. Damian was desillusioned with Bruce. And in my personal opinion Bruce doesn't exactly look like a winner right now, Bruce lost Wayne Enterprises, Wayne Manor and the family fortune, Alfred died, Damian left him, the citizens of Gotham turned against Batman too...I don't really know what Bruce is talking about here when he says "Damian only saw me today. The end results" as if Damian only sees how great Bruce is and doesn't know that Bruce did suffer a lot of defeats. Bruce sucks a lot right now, why are we acting like he's good at what he's doing? And even if Bruce wins eventually, he doesn't win every fight and I think Damian has been around him long enough to know that.

Plus, Damian has lost a ton these past few years, if Damian was capable of learning humility through losing I think he would have already got there at this point.

When I read Damian's and Flatline's fight I felt less like Flatline was a foil created to deal with a problem Damian's character actually has right now and more like Damian was forced into this position and into this arc to act as a foil to Williamson's concept for his own creation.

Connected to this idea that Damian needs to accept that losing is okay and necessary is the idea that Damian is going to be humbled in this book. Humility wasn't really talked about in Robin #1 so I understand why some people were confused as to why that word has been used a lot in discussions about this first issue.

My reason for connecting Damian's defeat with the fear that Williamson will try to humble Damian doesn't exactly come from the comic alone, but from what he has said in interviews:

"Williamson: Well, selfishly for me, I enjoy throwing Damian in different situations where he has to interact with people. And it might be situations where he isn't his normal situation, where he's such a competent person, but I think there are ways of throwing him into situations that might humble him or where he might clash with people."

After seeing Damian either get villainized or be the butt of the joke for several years hearing that Damian will be getting thrown into situations designed to highlight his weaknesses is not exactly making me feel excited. I know that other people find it funny when Damian gets humiliated and beaten down, but I don't. I've been seriously missing respect for Damian in DC's writing and the line where I stopped finding stuff like this funny has been crossed long ago. I have no idea what Williamson talks about when he says that we're usually seeing Damian in situations where he's competent. I would like to know what comics he's talking about because I would really love to read them.

Maybe Williamson will pull it off and make me like Damian's character arc later on but I'm not convinced by the seeds he has sown yet.

So far I'm seeing an arc I've already read through too many times, another one that feels like it's trying to solve a problem the character doesn't have (if anything the character suffers from having almost no wins in recent years) and one that will give me the opposite of what I want to see.

Someone put it quite well when they said to me that it feels like every writer thinks they need to put Damian down a notch because of his arrogance, but we've reached a point where he has been taken down so much that it makes him look stupid.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

(Accidental 150 Follower Special) IOTA’s Top 10 Best (and By That, I Mean Personal Favorite) Episodes of Miraculous Ladybug

Alright, I already covered what I considered to be the worst Miraculous Ladybug episodes in two parts, and now it’s time to talk about the what I consider to be the best Miraculous Ladybug episodes before I talk about... him...

I’m only putting one rule in place for this list. I'm going to try and list episodes with good qualities other than “cool-looking Akuma and awesome fight scenes”, and focus on other details like character moments and story.

Other than that, let’s get started.

These are the Top 10 Best Episodes of Miraculous Ladybug (in my personal opinion because your opinion is also valid)

#10: Mr. Pigeon

While Marinette works on sketching a design for a hat for a fashion contest where the winning design will be worn by Adrien (a rare example where the “Marinette does a thing to impress Adrien” plot actually works), a birdwatcher who loves feeding pigeons in the park is told off by the only police officer in Paris, causing him to get akumatized into the titular Mr. Pigeon, who has control over all of the pigeons in the city.

And by God, does this episode have fun with the concept.

In addition to constantly mimicking pigeon cries, Mr. Pigeon's movements are just so entertaining to watch, only aided by the creative ways he controls the flocks of pigeons.

I'm not kidding when at one point, Mr. Pigeon traps Ladybug and Cat Noir in a cage, and threatens to have his pigeons crap on them unless they hand over their Miraculous. Yeah.

This is one of the episodes that really set the standards for how outlandish the Akumas in Miraculous Ladybug could get. It kind of reminds me of an episode of the original Ultraman, where the SSSP has to find a way to move an incredibly heavy monster using increasingly abnormal strategies, like inflating it with air so it'll float like a balloon. It's clear it isn't taking itself too seriously, so the audience shouldn't either.

Admittedly, Cat Noir's feather allergy feels shoehorned in, and is only included to increase conflict, and you would think it would come up when Mayura, a bird-themed supervillain appears in the third season. But then again, that's just a minor nitpick.

It's just a really fun episode, and I wish we could see Ladybug and Cat Noir fight Mr. Pigeon again that isn't used for a cheap gag.

#9: The Puppeteer

After being told by her mom that she can't have a Ladybug doll made by Marinette, young Manon is Akumatized into the Puppeteer. But obviously, you can't have our heroes beating up a five-year-old, so instead, the Puppeteer has the power to exact control over past Akuma victims as long as she has the doll made by Marinette. So Ladybug and Cat Noir have to face off against Lady Wifi, the Evillustrator, and Rogercop, before the Puppeteer gets her hands on the dolls Marinette made of the two heroes and take control of them as well.

It's still kind of funny to think about the fact that of all the Akumas to become a huge threat to Ladybug and Cat Noir, it's a little girl throwing a temper tantrum. And like with “Mr. Pigeon”, the episode has a lot of fun with the concept, best reflected in the voice acting. You can tell that Carrie Keranen is having so much fun this episode with the stuff she says as Lady Wifi.

The fact that someone who was actually a major threat to the heroes with how she was able to easily outsmart them and also came really close to getting their Miraculous is now acting like a little kid using phrases like “super duper sorry” is even more hilarious.

I'm still a little confused as why of all the past villains, it's Evillustrator and Rogercop that get to come back, and I wish they had gotten more to say, but it's still a treat to see Ladybug and Cat Noir fighting four villains at once, especially since this was before “Heroes Day”.

#8: Sapotis

Hawkmoth akumatizes Alya's little sisters into Sapotis (supposedly based off a folktale, but I can't find anything about it online), who have the power to multiply and easily overwhelm Ladybug and Cat Noir, forcing Ladybug to recruit Alya to become a third hero, Rena Rouge.

I've been a little negative about Alya in the past, but this episode gives her some major character growth. One of the biggest problems I had with her character in Season 1 is how often she tried to figure out Ladybug's identity... despite claiming to be a huge superhero fan, who should know why superheroes keep their identities a secret. Thankfully, this episode mostly puts an end to this idea.

The episode opens with Marinette giving Alya some reasons why Ladybug would keep her identity a secret, and it actually plays into the episode.

Putting aside the stupid Rent-A-Miraculous system introduced in this episode, the idea of keeping secrets and how necessary they can be sometimes is reflected after the battle where Alya is hesitant at first to give up her Miraculous, but eventually concedes and keeps her identity a secret from Marinette (who ironically knows, but that's not important).

Even without that, this episode still has a lot of action with the three heroes fighting their way through an army of Sapotis, with plenty of banter during said action. Hell, at one point, Cat Noir says “gotta catch 'em all”. I don't have a joke here, that's just brilliant.

Out of all the introductory hero episodes, this one easily sticks out among most of them.

(Don’t worry, I’m going to talk about Rena Rouge’s character design in a later post.)

#7: Guitar Villain

I said before in an earlier post that Jagged Stone is one of my favorite characters in Miraculous Ladybug, so it's obvious that the episode where he gets akumatized would be on this list.

After a disagreement with his manager about trying to mimic the popular singer XY (who ironically lacks a Y chromosome), Jagged is akumatized into Guitar Villain, a rock star with a pet dragon who forces everyone to listen to his Awesome Solo (yes, he names his attacks too) to dance uncontrollably.

Honestly, there's not much I can really say about this episode. It's Ladybug and Cat Noir fighting a rock star who flies around on a goddamn dragon. That's one of the coolest things I've ever seen! Even the way they defeat him (which I won’t give away) is a fun jab at rock stars.

Admittedly, the episode does border on grouchy old man territory sometimes by complaining about how bad today's music is with the way they portray XY as a whiny and egotistical coward, but after watching “Silencer”, you'll be glad everyone hates him.

Overall, it's a rockingly awesome episode.

#6: The Dark Owl

Mr. Damocles, the principal of Marinette and Adrien's school, is akumatized into the Dark Owl, a corrupted version of his favorite comic book superhero (who would later turn out to be real in the New York special, but I don't want to acknowledge that), who uses his high-tech gadgets to trap Ladybug and Cat Noir, putting them in one of their toughest binds yet.

I'm a huge fan of the Adam West Batman show, so you could probably guess why it's on this list. This episode really feels like an episode of that show with how goofy and over the top everything is. Obviously, this episode has a few Batman references thrown in (even an Incredibles reference at one point), and they're all hilarious.

I just love how complex Dark Owl's traps for Ladybug and Cat Noir are, and the fact that he actually manages to outsmart them at one point. Like seriously, have you ever heard of a death trap that involves drowning someone in whipped cream? That’s totally something you’d see the Joker setting up.

I don't really want to give away the ending (which is why this part is so short), because I think it's a really clever resolution that you should check out for yourself.

#5: Gorizilla

Hawkmoth akumatizes Adrien's bodyguard into Gorizilla, whose sole purpose is to protect Adrien. His motivation? To see if Adrien is actually Cat Noir or not. So Adrien has to avoid this gigantic gorilla's wrath with Marinette, all while trying to catch a movie his late mother was in.

See this? This is Adrienette done right. This is the kind of interaction I like when it comes to romance. Marinette and Adrien spend a few scenes with each other avoiding Adrien's crazy fanbase, and Marinette doesn't stammer half of her words. Even when she interacts with Adrien as Ladybug, she still remains confident, and Adrien trusts her judgment when it looks like he might fall. I don't just want Marinette and Adrien to cuddle with each other or declare their love for each other when they get their memories wiped. I want them to interact like human beings before they actually start a relationship, and this episode is a good example of it.

Adrien also gets some good focus with the way he views his relationship with his parents, as does Gabriel with his relationship with his son. Granted, he's taking a pretty huge gamble trying to kill Adrien to see if he's Cat Noir or not as opposed to just... taking off his ring while he sleeps. Can we at least admit he's trying?

I feel they could have done more with the King Kong homage (guess who I'm talking about?), but I can understand there wasn't enough time to focus on that. It's still an important episode to watch for plot and character growth that will barely be acknowledged in later episodes.

#4: Sandboy

tHe SaNdBoY hAs ChEcKeD iN. nOw NiGhTmArEs CaN bEgIn.

Now that we got that obvious joke out of the way, let's talk about one of the most creative episodes of the show.

Tikki and Plagg, Marinette and Adrien's Kwamis (the magical beings that power their Miraculous) take part in a ritual with the other Kwamis inside Master Fu's Miracle Box to contact Nooroo, Hawkmoth's Kwami, on his birthday and get an idea of where he is. Unfortunately, Hawkmoth chooses to akumatize someone during the ritual, leaving Marinette and Adrien helpless to fight back against Sandboy, an Akuma with the power to make their worst fears come true.

I said before in my worst list when talking about “Ladybug” that there was too much going on for one episode, what with Marinette's expulsion, the attempted Scarletmoth attack, and the fake Ladybug plotlines generally being rushed through. This episode is basically the opposite of that (ironically, they're both the penultimate episodes of their respective seasons).

The Kwami ritual and the Akuma attack are perfectly staged together so one affects the other. Not only do the Kwamis have to risk aborting their ritual to reach Nooroo in order to fight the Akuma, but Marinette and Adrien have to deal without fighting off Sandboy's nightmares on their own. Both plots balance each other out into a well-crafted story.

This is also one of the only episodes in the show where the Akuma of the week isn't the man focus. Here, we don't even see what happens to get the kid akumatized into Sandboy, and instead, Gabriel senses someone with negative emotions and akumatizes the kid offscreen. This works, because it doesn't distract from the main plot too much.

Even Marinette and Adrien's worst fears beautifully contrast each other, with both managing to be unsettling in different ways, even if they both have different tones. While Adrien's worst fear is being imprisoned in his own room (the fear only made worse with Plagg's absence), Marinette's worst fear is... the real star of the episode. Ladies and Gentlemen, I think you all know who I'm talking about.

You can tell the animators had a field day with animating Nightmare Adrien. Just look at the way he moves around and the faces he makes. It manages to be terrifying and hilarious at the same time. Bryce Papenbrook's performance only makes it better, cementing this as the highlight of the episode.

This episode also does a good job at foreshadowing the main plot for Season 3 with Hawkmoth finding out about the other Kwamis and by extension, more Miraculous.

It's got plot, comedy, good action, and Nightmare Adrien, so how can you turn this episode down?

And no, I'm not talking about Nightmare Ladybug, mainly because I'm tired of all the evil doppelgangers from the worst list.

#3: Startrain

Yes, believe it or not, I managed to find a Season 3 episode that wasn't complete garbage, and spoiler alert, this isn't the only one.

Marinette and Adrien's class goes on a field trip to London by taking the train, until the driver is akumatized into Startrain, who wants to escape to the one place that hasn't been corrupted by capitalism... SPACE! So Ladybug and Cat Noir have to defeat Startrain while also finding a way to bring everyone on the train back home.

I like how this episode plays with the usual Akuma of the week formula. Unlike every other Akuma they've fought, Cat Noir points out that if they beat Startrain, everyone will die, so they have to be more strategic in their approach. They don't even fight Startrain for most of the episode, as they have to make their way to the front of the train to confront the Akuma. The action in this episode is very creative and really takes advantage of zero gravity, only aided by the design of the futuristic train the episode takes place in.

The new hero introduced, Pegasus (AKA Max, another student in Marinette and Adrien's class), is also really cool, being very intelligent and helping out the heroes progress through the train even before he gets the Horse Miraculous. It makes sense that his intelligence would be used rather than just his powers in this situation.

There are even some good character moments too. For once, Master Fu does something smart and loans the Horse Miraculous (which has the power of teleportation) to Marinette so she can still go on the class trip, trusting her and actually letting her have a life. It was also nice to see Alya stick up for Marinette by keeping Lila from interrupting her nap with Adrien.

This episode is basically like a refreshing glass of water to enjoy during the garbage fire that was Season 3.

(I’m going to talk about Pegasus’ character design later on too, don’t worry)

#2: Silencer

Lukanette shippers, ASSEMBLE!

Music producer Bob Roth and his son XY hold a contest for young artists to show off their skills, and Kitty Section, a band composed of several recurring characters, decides to enter, with Marinette helping to design their costumes. But as soon as they submit their video, they find out that XY copied their style, naturally pissing the band off.

Marinette and the lead guitarist of Kitty Section, Luka, confront Bob Roth and XY, who threaten to ruin their careers by claiming that they ripped off XY. Seeing Marinette getting threatened is more than enough for Hawkmoth to akumatize Luka into Silencer, who naturally has the power to silence and mimic the voices of others.

I talked about Luka and his relationship with Marinette in an earlier post (specifically the one where Astruc claimed that the fandom growing to like Luka counted as character development), and I said that this was one of the few good episodes this season because of their interactions. This episode basically made me realize how much Luka cares for Marinette, and the episode gives plenty of time to show the two spending time together and growing closer. It's basically everything “Oni-Chan” should have been about, giving some depth to Luka and not portraying him as a crazy person like they did with Kagami in that episode.

Silencer is also one of the more creatively designed villains this season, and has a really creative approach to achieving his goals. While the ability to steal and imitate someone's voice seems mundane compared to control over the weather, or making nightmares come to life, it's used very effectively. Silencer basically tricks the police into arresting Bob Roth while imitating the mayor's voice, and he threatens to make his life a living hell by using the connections to the voices he's stolen. Even with the hand puppet gesture, it's still unsettling to have Silencer speak in all these voices, and it would make for a really interesting horror movie.

Even Ladybug and Cat Noir's interactions are back to their Season 1 levels of enjoyment. Even though Silencer took her voice, Ladybug just makes so many expressions that do a great job at describing her feelings, which naturally plays off Cat Noir's motormouth tendencies. Whenever Cat Noir jokes about Ladybug's condition, he is rightfully called out on it and is reprimanded in some way, my favorite being when Ladybug uses her yo-yo to hit Cat Noir on the head to shut him up. Even putting aside that, they still work well together this episode and really feel like equals. I also love their silent fist bump when Bob Roth is exposed.

Again, the episode still takes the time to go on about how unoriginal today's musicians are, and how they lack artistic creativity and all that crap. Look, given how ham-fisted the writing in this show can get, are you surprised the commentary isn't subtle?

Even putting aside how much this episode made me appreciate Lukanette, it still has a lot of great moments that aren't even related to the ship itself, which is a real testament to how this show can perfectly balance romance and story when it's done right. Now if only the show could try this much with Adrienette, then people wouldn't hate the main pairing of the show this much.

#1: The Collector

Taking place immediately after the Season 1 finale, Marinette meets Master Fu and discusses the book she found depicting past Miraculous users. Marinette theorizes that since the book was in the Agreste mansion, Gabriel could be Hawkmoth. And to the surprise of absolutely no one, she's right, and in order to draw off suspicion, Gabriel akumatizes himself into the Collector.

This episode has several good writing decisions for both sides, and the choices the characters make feel natural. Gabriel akumatizing himself is such a smart move, and so is what Marinette and Master Fu do with the book at the end. This episode does a great job setting up future plot threads and establishes Master Fu's character and the mystery associated with him.

The Collector is a visually stunning villain, and his powers are really creative, leading to a great fight with Ladybug and Cat Noir, who use a great strategy to outsmart him. I also love how over the top he is in order to make the heroes believe that he's working for Hawkmoth, all with a devious smile on his face.

This was also the episode that really got me into Miraculous Ladybug as a whole. I checked out the first season on a whim after it was mentioned in a Pan Pizza video, but it was during the hiatus between seasons, and I hadn't really started using Tumblr yet, so it mostly stayed off my radar. When Season 2 started however, I really got invested in the story, and the way this episode turned out was a big reason why. I wondered what it would be like when Adrien finds out his own father is Hawkmoth, and how the story would play out after the reveal.

Despite what it led up to, I still consider “The Collector” to be my favorite episode of Miraculous Ladybug.

Well, now that I talked about that, not it's time to talk about what I consider to be the worst episode of Miraculous Ladybug, “Felix”. God help me...

[fantasy-pens]

Lukanette soulmate AU please!

Congrats on 200 followers!

Thank you anon!! Fun thing is, I was working on a Soulmate AU (ViperBug + Lukanette) when your prompt came in! I hope you like the story, read under the cut to find out!

“What do ya mean ya don’t want to eat this, lad? It’s a celebration day for us and above all, it’s yer favorite.”

It had started the night of the music festival.

  Luka glared at the plate of Italian Beef, a frown marring his features. Ma was right, the dish was his favorite. In fact, any dish with onions in it was a simple delight. But for some reason, he now had an urge to throw the damned beef in the trash and never see it again.

Pushing his plate away, Luka sighed. “I dunno, Ma. I just… where’s the nearest basin again?”

  “But it’s onions. You like onions,” Juleka spoke up.

“Correction: liked,” Luka replied, before pushing the dish further away and leaning back in his chair. “Right now, the very sight of them is making me want to throw up.”

  “Laddie, it's celebration day! We always make Italian Beef, and you relish it.” Anarka spoke up in an authoritative tone, causing Luka to look up. “And y’know we don’t tolerate wastage in this house. So right now, you eat what you got on yer plate.”

“I know, Ma. But I just don’t want to.” Luka got up from his chair and picked up his guitar. “I guess I will just go out and eat something. I’m sorry I ruined the dinner.”

  Ignoring his mom’s calls, Luka climbed out to the deck of Liberty. As he got off the houseboat and onto the dock, he quickly worked his way up the footpath. His mind was in a turmoil. He couldn’t understand his sudden disgust for onions; he loved them like crazy. Dishes without onions had seemed so bland. But now even the smell of them made him gag.

  Searching around for some affordable fast food joint, Luka found himself getting irritated with his stupid condition. The music festival had been one wild ride and with the adrenaline of the day finally subsiding, he found himself growing tired and hungrier with every passing minute. Fast food without onions was unheard of, and given his dilemma, he really couldn’t eat anything substantial off the menu. After a lot of calculations and internal cursing, he (or rather his hunger) finally managed to convince himself to dine on a big block of strawberry ice cream that night, hoping the sugar content could keep him going for the time being.

He dug into his ice cream, relishing the sugary delight despite its insubstantiality. Having something in his stomach made him feel better and energized, and Luka didn’t mind missing the festive treat. After all, ice cream could count as a treat too, right?

  Eating the last scoop of the cold delight, Luka chucked the carton in the nearby trashcan and let out a sigh. And that was when his eyes caught sight of something colorful against the grey walls.

A flower.

  The Couffaine boy peered at the tiny flower with curiosity, his hand coming up to feel its petals. The flower was soft, the flower was beautiful. The flower was a delight to see. It was colourful and looked absolutely… tasty.

Luka wondered how it would feel like in his mouth.

  Looking around and finding no one, the boy weighed his chances. The flower was irresistible and Luka felt totally drawn to it. But was eating a flower actually something sensible?

Then again, sensibility and Boat Kid couldn’t exist in one sentence.

  Plucking the flower, Luka shoved it into his mouth.

The flower was as soft on his tongue as he had imagined it to be. And juicy too. The nectar was the right amount of sweet and tangy, and the stalk wasn’t bad eith--

  “THE HECK?! ”

Abruptly turning around, Luka found an astonished Juleka staring at him with eyes blown wide, jaw slack open. Her gaze dropped from his face to his mouth, causing Luka to gulp the now crushed flower. 

  Well, nearly gulp.

The tasty flower was too dry.

  Luka coughed and choked and spluttered, causing Juleka to rush over to him and pound him on the back. As he recovered from his coughing fit, his sister pointed at her own mouth in astonishment. Luka reached over his mouth to find a leaf sticking on his lips.

  Oh well. 

  This was going to be a fun explanation.

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   “Oh my god, that’s… that’s downright hilarious!” Ladybug wheezed in delight before letting out a small yelp as she overbalanced herself, nearly toppling off the roof. Viperion caught her just in time, helping her straighten up again. Muttering a small thanks to him, Ladybug let out another chuckle as she held her stomach, her other hand coming up to rest on the snake hero’s left shoulder.

  “I-I’m sorry,” the heroine giggled, wiping the tears of mirth from her eyes before looking up at Viperion. “But I can’t help it. It’s just too funny! I just...I can’t even imagine Juleka’s reaction to that. How did you explain it to her?”

The snake hero chuckled, shaking his head lightly. “I didn’t need to. Turns out, she had already figured out something was fishy the moment I declared my hatred for onions. And my ‘hunting of an innocent flower’ just solidified her explanations.”

  “Hunting of an innocent flower, good lord,” Ladybug let out another giggle before her stance turned slightly serious. “If I know right, onions are snake repellents. Do you think…”

Viperion shook his head in denial. “No. She didn’t connect it like that. Moreover, it was after a month or so that Viperion made his debut so..I don’t think it has to do with the Miraculous.”

  “Then what does it have to deal with?”

  Viperion remained silent for a moment. He didn’t want to tell the real reason, didn’t want to mess things up. However, seeing no way out, Viperion simply sighed. “Soulmates.”

Her silence served as an indication for him to continue.

  Viperion kicked at the air, before turning his gaze to the city of lights that lay in front of him. “It’s some sort of weird rare connection that activated when I first met my soulmate. Apparently, I started liking what my soulmate loves to eat. And whoever she is, she started liking my favorite food.”

  “You mean onions?” For some reason, Ladybug’s voice was highly guarded.

“Yep. And we both dislike what we earlier liked, so…” Viperion let out another sigh. “I miss eating onions. Like, I have thankfully developed some tolerance to the smell and can eat an onion ring or two, but I want to relish them like I used to.” 

  “Isn’t there any way to cure it?”

“Apparently, I have to kiss her,” Viperion mirthlessly chuckled as he picked up a hibiscus from the small basket he had brought, popping the flower in his mouth. He ignored Ladybug’s strangled sound; Viperion was too used to being looked at like some idiot whenever he ate them. A profound silence stretched between the two heroes, and Viperion tried his best to not break it with his munching. 

  However, the flower was too tasty to give a damn. 

  “Why do you refer to your soulmate as a ‘her’?” Ladybug’s voice completely shattered the remaining traces of silence. “I mean, they necessarily aren’t a girl, right?”

“I already know who she is.”

  Ladybug stiffened as she looked at him quizzically. Viperion weighed the chances in his head. He knew what he was signing up for, and he didn’t want to mess up the friendship he had with the superheroine, but circumstances simply didn't seem to be in his favor. “I only interacted with two new people that day -- one was the girl I love and the other was you. Aaanddd--”

  “And?”

Viperion paused, his hand stopping near his mouth, another hibiscus held comically in it. He looked at Ladybug, then at the flower in his hand, then back at Ladybug, eyebrow quirked up in a “are you serious?” expression. 

  Ladybug looked confusedly at him for a moment, before her eyes literally bugged out as she let out an incomprehensible noise. Viperion immediately hurried to calm her down. “I mean! It’s just an assumption based on the qualities your miraculous gives you and you don’t necessarily like--”

“You!” Ladybug screamed out, causing the snake hero to flinch away. However, the heroine simply grabbed him by the collar and pulled him towards herself, her stormy bluebell eyes inches away from his terrified teals. “You are the reason why I moved from detesting onions to loving them!”

  “I-what?!” Viperion squeaked out, before clearing his throat. “I mean, REALLY?! YOU DETESTED ONIONS?! ”

“I DID!”

  “But whyyyyyy?!” Viperion let out a whine. “Onions are so good!”

“THAT’S NOT THE POINT! Why do I have to deal with morons?!”

  “But why don’t you understand? Onions are so good!” If Viperion couldn’t eat onions, he would make others know the joy of eating that vegetable. “They are tangy, and flavory, and savory. And have you tried them in dishes? They taste so wonde -MMPH! ”

  Only to be silenced by a pair of lips slamming on his own.

His eyes widened in surprise as soft lips moved over his own, and before he knew what was happening, Ladybug pulled away.

  She let his collar go and grabbed the flower from his hand, popping it into her mouth. Viperion remained standing where he was, gawking at her like a stupid fellow.

“This is so messed up… I just… follow me.” Saying so, Ladybug swung off the roof.

  Viperion just watched her retreating figure, his hands coming over his lips. He could taste the strawberry lip gloss and feel the heat in his cheeks. And he didn’t know what the hell had just happened.

  The love of his life was Marinette. Soulmates or not, he had come to accept that Ladybug and him were just friends. 

He was supposed to be someone filling up for Chat when the latter couldn’t show up on patrols. He was supposed to be Ladybug’s soundboard: talking to her when she needed him, whether it was sharing jokes or stressful events.

  He wasn’t supposed to kiss her.

Well, technically, it was she who kissed him, but the problem still remained.

She wasn’t supposed to kiss him!

  Ladybug and him were just friends. Friends do not kiss each other on the lips. And he was in love with Marinette, he could not return Ladybug’s feelings, no matter how much his heart broke at that.

What was he going to do?

  His lyre chimed, causing him to jump in surprise. He picked up the incoming call from Ladybug and placed the device next to his ear.

That had been a mistake, for it immediately blared to life.

  “ VIPERION! ” Ladybug’s voice boomed out of the communicator, and Viperion nearly threw the device off the roof. “Are you coming or should I drag you around Paris wrapped in my yo-yo?!”

“I am! I am!” Saying so, he cut the call and sighed.

  It was time to face the music. Literally.

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   Viperion landed down on the darkened Dupain-Cheng balcony, totally confused. The GPS had shown him that this was the place, but why did Ladybug decide to land here?

Something soft hit him in the face. Surprised, he picked the thing up from the floor. It was a hibiscus flower.

  “Glad to see you could make it here, Luka.”

Viperion immediately turned to the source of voice, his advanced senses detecting someone standing there. The sound was definitely Ladybug’s. However, whether she was suited or not was the question.

  “Ladybug?”

The girl sighed. “Yeah, that’s me. Now tell me, can you eat that flower?”

  Viperion looked down at the hibiscus in his hand. For some reason, he didn’t feel the urge to gobble up the entire thing in one go. He took a tentative bit of the petal and immediately spat the damned thing out.

“Yuck! It’s gross!” The hero exclaimed, spluttering. “No, I can’t eat it!”

  “And the onion rings by your side?” came Ladybug’s question. Viperion looked around to find the same beside him.

There had been a plate of onion rings by his side and he hadn’t realised?!

  He picked up one ring and put it in his mouth. And his eyes immediately filled with tears.

He could actually relish his favorite food after such a long time!

  Grabbing the plate, Viperion popped the onion rings into his mouth, munching on them happily. Ladybug’s chuckle caught his attention, causing him to blush.

  “I’m glad the kiss worked, Luka.”

“Thank you so much Ladybug! You don’t know how happy I am and-- wait,” he gulped the food down as he looked at the heroine inquisitively, “The kiss didn’t mean anything?”

  There was silence on the other end, before Ladybug let out a sigh. “The day I started liking onions, I knew I had interacted with my soulmate. But who they were, I couldn’t say.”

  Viperion put the plate aside, giving Ladybug his full attention.

  “I knew it wasn’t my former crush: he loves passion-fruit macarons. I asked Chat, and turned out it wasn’t him either: Chat has a sweet tooth and he had started liking spicy things despite his low tolerance. And I don’t like spice so--”

“You weren’t his soulmate,” Viperion whispered.

  “Nope.” Ladybug let out another sigh. “Going around asking for everyone’s favorite food sounded weird, so I didn’t do that. Plus, I missed my flowers and hated onions with my heart. I was eager to know who was the cause of this entire mess in my life. Turns out it was you...and I’m glad of that.”

Viperion could hear the smile in her voice, and he took one tentative step towards her. “I’m sorry for being the cause of your dilemma, Ladybug. But this still doesn’t answer my question. ‘Cause you see, there is someone else who has a claim over my heart.”

  He heard her breath hitch, and that alone gave him his answer, Ladybug did have feelings for him. 

“I-I see.”

  Viperion felt absolutely bad for turning her down like that, and he racked his brains to find something, anything that could remove the heavy lull the conversation had fallen into. However, Ladybug saved him from the trouble.

  “Luka?”

“Yeah?”

  “It’s-it’s okay. I won’t mind us staying just… friends .” The sadness in her voice broke his heart, but he chose to stay silent. “I just… Can I know who she is? If you don’t mind?”

Viperion smiled despite himself. “It’s the girl whose balcony we’re on.”

  Ladybug’s breath hitched, and he sensed her take a step towards him. “You-you mean Marinette? Marinette Dupain Cheng?”

“Yes.”

  Ladybug walked towards him slowly and steadily, until he could practically feel the heat radiating off her. He looked down to find her bluebell eyes sparkling at him. Bluebell eyes that didn’t have a mask covering them. Bluebell eyes that, for some reason, had him completely floored. As if he never wanted this moment between them to break.

  “Can you… can you please detransform?” She spoke in a voice so soft, Viperion nearly missed her words.

“Scales rest,” he whispered, afraid to shatter the unknown bubble he was trapped in.

  Teal light filled the area, and that was when Luka heard Ladybug’s soft whisper to Tikki, asking the kwami to turn on the lights.

  The fairy lights slowly came to life, illuminating the balcony the duo were on. And underneath the stars and in the ambient glow of the lights, Luka found himself staring at the love of his life.

His melody.

  “Marinette?” He breathed out, his heart thudding in his ears.

“Luka,” came her soft reply.

  “Where did Ladybug go?”

“I-What?!”

  Luka couldn’t help himself from breaking down into a fit of chuckles.

“Oh my lord, that expression is just… priceless! Marine-OUCH! OUCH! SORRY!! Stop hitting me!” 

  “That’s for being a jerk!” Marinette wailed, before pulling him by the collar and kissing him full on the lips, catching him by surprise. “And that’s for the confession.”

For the second time that night, Luka was caught by surprise. As Marinette pulled away, he was staring at her with wide eyes, his hand automatically coming up to touch his lips. He could taste the strawberry lip gloss on his lips and felt the heat in his cheeks. Once again he didn’t know what to do.

  “Luka? Are you okay?” Her voice broke him out of his trance.

“Marinetteeee,” Luka whined, “You kissed me two times without any warning and you expect me to be okay?”

  She giggled, before taking a step towards him, her lips lifted in a smirk. “Well, don’t they say that third time’s the charm?”

He blinked at her, before smirking as his arms wrapped around her waist. He took the hibiscus from her hands and tossed it away. She knocked over the plate of onions in retaliation. Luka chuckled before pulling her close. 

  “Well, shall we test that out then, My melody?” He whispered against her ear, causing her to let out a breathy chuckle.

Soft lips pressed against his for the third time that night, catching him by surprise yet again. Not by the spontaneity of the kiss, but by how unique it was. Sweet as sugar, fruity as her lip gloss, tangy (and a little weird) as the hibiscus she had earlier had, yet completely Marinette . He sighed against her lips, feeling complete, and she let out a breathy giggle. He chuckled along with her, breaking the kiss.

  “Wow,” Marinette let out a relieved sigh, catching Luka’s attention. “It was so... different!”

  “Different as in?” He curiously asked, eyebrows quirked up in interest.

“Fruity, citrus, with that slight weird tinge of onions.”

  “Onions are not weird, Marinette Dupain-Cheng.”

“Fight me on that, Luka Couffaine” she countered, cutely sticking her tongue out.

  Luka laughed as he pulled her close to himself once again. She laid her head on his chest, giggling excitedly. Letting out a happy sigh, he gently crooked a finger under her chin, tipping her head up and finding himself lost in the lights and stars that danced in her eyes.

  “You really want to fight on it, Viperion?” Marinette whispered in a tone that sent tingles down his spine. He let out a breathy laugh, looking at her through his bangs as he drew close to her.

“I might just make you understand my point with a night full of kisses, Ladybug.”

  The fairy lights and the stars above them were the happy witness of her jovial affirmation.

[thebrunetteweasley16]

It´s nice to have a friend (Part 1)

(not my gif)

Paring: James Potter x reader Summary: This is based on Taylor Swift song “It´s nice to have a friend” it´s basically about James gathering up the courage to ask the reader out. Wordcount: 1.7k

James Potter's speech mocking the one Dumbledore just gave on the great hall was almost a tradition for the people in your year. Everyone gathered in one classroom with bottles of firewhiskey to have the welcoming party that you all deserved, and, when everyone was drunk enough, James climbed a desk and made the crowd laugh with his speech.

Every year the marauders assured that no professor would ever find out about the party because somehow they knew if they were near and made everyone keep their voices down. Everyone in your year was invited, the only requirement was not being a death eater.

"welcome to a new year at Hogwarts!" James said imitating the old man's voice "may this year be brighter than Snivellus' greasy hair!"

You laughed at the way everyone cheered in response

"Do you want more firewhiskey?"

Marlene asked with the bottle on her hands, you shook your head, knowing that if you had even a little bit more you'd probably do something you'd regret in the morning. Marlene lifted her shoulders and drank straight out of the bottle, making you laugh. You didn't notice but someone's eyes looked for you in the crowd when they heard your laugh.

People might guess that James Potter's favorite sound was the wind when he was going full speed on his broom, or the way crowds laughed at his jokes, but no. James' favorite sound was most definitely the sound of your laughter.

When his eyes found you he couldn't help but smile. He convinced himself he smiled at the sight of Dorcas trying to take the bottle out of Marlene's hands but in reality the way your smile made him feel was honestly a little bit unfair for him

"isn't that right Prongs?"

Sirius' voice interrupted his thoughts and he had to face how he was so lost in you that he had no idea what his best friend was talking about with the rest of the quidditch team

"I was too drunk to pay attention to what you were saying but I've learned from experience to say no"

And with that he made the whole team laugh, but when he looked again to where you were standing there was no sign of you. He looked everywhere to see if he could find you, and he did just when you were about to leave the room.

He made his way to you

"(y/n) hey! Leaving so soon?"

He asked touching your shoulder. You turned around to see James Potter standing next to you, and the usual weird feeling in your stomach bothered you like it always did when he was anywhere near.

"yeah, I- I'm a little bit tired. Aren't you?"

"a little, but the party is too good to go to sleep just yet"

You chuckled

"I'll see you tomorrow James"

You turned around to go to the door, but James' voice stopped you

"I can walk you to you common room if you want"

You bit your lip to repress the biggest smile

"yes! Thank you. It's nice to have a friend like you"

You said finally as he opened the door so you two could get out of the room.

Months had past and James felt hopeless when it came to you. Your smile, your eyes, your everything made him forget all the cool and witty things he had planned to tell you every single time.

His friends teased him about it to no end, but he always denied his feelings for you. It was easier, because that way he could ignore the pit that formed on his stomach every time he saw you smiling or laughing with another guy.

He wanted to distract himself that day, so he came up with the idea to go to Hogsmade with his friends and they all accepted. With his hands on his pockets he walked to the common room where everyone were already waiting for him.

They made their way to the small village and the cold wind of the early days of winter made James shiver. He took the hands out of his pockets and only then he noticed he had forgotten his gloves

"hey Moony, do you have a spare pair of gloves?"

He knew none of the guys had a spare pair of gloves, it was a little obvious, but he wanted them to notice he didn't have gloves so they'd borrow him at least one glove. The guy at his left looked at him, and James knew that look, he was about to get sassed

"why would someone bring two pairs of gloves to Hogsmade?"

The other two guys at his right laughed and James rolled his eyes.

James didn't want to get his hands out of his pockets, not even when they were sitting in the three broomsticks. Everyone was enjoying their butterbeer but he just stared at it, gathering up the courage to get his hands almost frozen to get a sip of his beverage.

"Hi! Can I sit here?" James' ears knew that voice too well, and his gaze followed it maybe a little too quickly "my friends wanted to go to Zonko but I'm too cold for that"

You were standing there and James had to fight the heat that went to his cheeks when he saw how cute you looked with a beanie. Sirius smiled and wiggled his eyebrows at James, but he just ignored it

"sure"

Remus answered and you tried to sit beside him but before you could do that Sirius spoke

"we're actually saving that chair for someone, can you sit in other one please?"

You furrowed your eyebrows but smiled when you saw that the only other empty chair was beside James.

You loved chatting with the marauders, they always made you laugh until your cheeks hurt and that day was not an exception. Plus, your humor fited perfectly with theirs so they also laughed a lot when they were with you.

Sirius was telling the story of how he changed every slytherin's tie color to confuse them, when you noticed James shivering a lot

"are you cold?"

You whispered to him, not wanting to draw attention, because if his friends noticed they would most definitely make fun of him

"just a little, I forgot my gloves"

Your attempts of making that conversation private were in vain because everyone's attention was now on you two. You looked at your own gloves, they were too big on you because they were your cousin's. You smiled at James and took off one glove to give to him

"here, I'm not that cold anyways"

You said. It was obviously a lie but no one said anything.

James stared at you

"no, no no I can't take it. You'll freeze"

"No I won't, I just need one hand to drink my butterbear. I'll leave the other one in my pocket. Here"

You said as you took James' hand and put him the glove yourself. The weird feeling in your hands when you felt his cold skin didn't let you see how Sirius and Remus were smirking. James smiled brightly at you

"Thanks (y/n)" He said. Then he looked at his friends who didn't offer him a glove like you did and added sarcastically "It's nice to have a friend"

Sirius smiled at Remus

"oh Merlin! How could we be so stupid?! We have to do the thing!"

Sirius said looking comically worried

"right! The thing!" Remus continued "I can't believe we forgot! Why didn't you remind us Pete?"

When you turned to look at Peter he looked as confused as James and you

"th- the thing? What thing?"

Peter's eyebrows furrowed, and Sirius just gasped

"I can't believe it Moony. Peter forgot about the thing too!"

"Well we need to go and remind Peter about the thing! See you later (y/n), Prongs“

Remus grabbed Peter by the arm and the three of them left you and a very confused James alone at the table

"that was weird"

You said, chuckling a little at the strange behavior of James's friends. He nodded in agreement

"they're always weird, but they save me a seat in the great hall when I'm late so now I can't leave them"

You giggled and tried to think of something funny to say, but nothing came to your mind. You two stayed in silence for seconds that felt like years to you. James avoided to look at your face as hard as he could, and just then a question occurred to you

"James, do you like being with me?"

His eyes then found yours and you could see the surprise in his gaze

"of course!"

You looked doubtful

"it's just... You are so fun and extroverted when you are with your friends. Everybody knows you are so cool and charismatic, but with me you just, I don't know, turn off"

The word panic couldn't even begin to describe how James felt when you told him that. He knew it was true. All of his friends noticed, and the whole quidditch team, plus Lily and Dorcas, even Snape teased him about how his brain shut down when he was near you, but he hoped you wouldn't notice, or that you wouldn't suspect anything. It was strange, really. He felt confident most of the time, like when he was practicing quidditch or when he raised his hand on McGonagall's class, but when it came to you it was whole different thing. He hoped you knew how special you were for him, but how could you know if his actions were screaming the opposite? He saw your gloveless hand resting on the table and something gave him the courage to grab it with his own

"I love being with you"

You looked at his hand taking yours as if not believing it, but when you looked into his eyes you knew that you were more than awake

"so" James spoke again "I think my friends are going to be very busy for the rest of the trip. Wanna hang out?"

You smiled and James could've sworn that that was what it must feel like to have his heart doing a back flip

"Yeah. Sounds like fun"