#this is a joke because i only got 2 lunch breaks in 7 years so i have zero idea what actually happened in the breakroom 🥴

[cosmicmewtwo]

mrs. krabappel and principal skinner were in the employee breakroom making babies and I saw one of the babies and the baby looked at me

[alovesreading]

Constant Repeat | Part 18

Summary: Having worked at Focus Creeps for a year, Ella knows that as a production assistant and part of the crew, there’s one important rule: don’t interact with the talent unless it’s needed. But once she meets Arctic Monkeys, and the recording of the music videos for their upcoming fourth studio album starts, the band seem to become her exception. Not only because they treat her more like a friend than just someone else they’re working with but when Alex continuously makes her blush with his flirting, so enthralled by her that he forgets he’s got a girlfriend, Ella finds herself growing closer to him. As videos are filmed, wrapped and edited, the friendship lines become blurry. Situations unfold, secrets are told and others are kept under lock and key, but how long can Alex and Ella endure being stuck in each other’s minds on constant repeat.

Word Count: 41.3k

Story Warnings: Throughout this series there will be suggestive talk, jealousy, cheating, alcohol and drug use, angst, smut.

A/N: Well, clearly I need to stop deeming one or another chapter the longest of the series when I still haven't written the rest cos I'm actually equally horrified and surprised that this chapter is this long - especially since I had to chop down a third of it to push it towards a new chapter. Yep, that's right - you lot are getting two more chapters after this one and the epilogue lol Anyway, I cannot believe I'm posting this chapter finally!!! Pinch me moment, really, but I hope with all my heart that you love it. Also sorry but I just literally finished writing this so it's not fully proofread so I'm very sorry if there's grammatical and spelling mistakes. Okay, I'll shut up now!! Enjoy!!! xxx

Masterlist

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 |

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Four days had passed since that stupid article had come out and Ella seemed to be working on automatic. She was trying her best to appear completely normal and unbothered while every word she’d read that day echoed inside her mind in an agonizing loop.

The giddy Ella that Ben had been teasing all day that Thursday was long gone by the end of the day. He had been completely ignored when he asked her what was wrong while everyone was saying goodbye and walking out the door to go home.

And the following four days were just the same: a blank expression on her face that only was exchanged from time to time for a forced smile she pulled whenever someone asked her if she was alright.

Ben had tried to joke with her on Friday, teasing her about being so down bad for Alex that she was missing him too much to function. But it had gone poorly. Ella had frozen in her place and stood up abruptly after a few beats of silence, grabbing her pack of cigarettes and lighter to take with her outside and her voice broke as she mumbled that she needed to go for a smoke. That was when Ben started to actually worry.

Even her coworkers had realized it was something far deeper than they’d been thinking when Monday had come around and she looked the same as the end of Thursday and Friday. At first, they thought she was just shutting down after coming back from her hometown, but she never let it drag on this much when that would happen. Usually she’d speak to her family on the phone on the weekend and that’d be enough for her to be cured of the homesickness, but this time it was apparent that it just wasn’t the case.

They tried to cheer her up during lunch break, tempting her with an offer to take her to her favorite Los Feliz restaurant, but she shook her head to decline their advances. With an absent look on her face, she told them she’d brought her own food that day. No witty remark to hold them up to that offer in the future, just falling silently into eating—more like moving around—the lunch she’d packed herself the night before.

Even if she was behaving that way, she was fully invested in her work and whilst everyone appreciated the fact that work wasn’t being halted, it just wasn’t something anyone in the office enjoyed seeing.

So Ben and Aaron begged her to go home earlier that day, knowing she’d be willing to stay way past usual hours just to drown in the work that had accumulated slightly while she was in Tennessee. She had already caught up with a lot on Thursday and Friday, and the last thing anyone wanted was for her to burnout due to her seeking an escape from whatever was going on by working non-stop.

Ella’s eyes were red from how long she’d been staring at her computer, editing pictures without a break once she came back into her office after finishing lunch—which had been a mere few bites of her pasta before threw it away. She still had two weeks to give back the finished product but she was determined to just do everything and anything she could to distract herself from her thoughts.

Staying at the office later than usual on Thursday and Friday had helped, and the weekend she’d spent alone at home had been beyond miserable, she needed the distraction that work gave her that Monday, and every day that would follow until her mind would stop racing and she could try to get over everything—force herself to forget about everything that had happened in Tennessee and forget about the hope that had bloomed inside her from it all, the one that made her heart break in a thousand more pieces the more time passed.

It was all a blur how Ben and Aaron managed to get her out of the office by six in the afternoon and when she got back home by seven, she was thankful for loud music and the lighter than usual LA traffic.

She’d spent the weekend deep cleaning every corner of her house, trying to be meticulous in every aspect so that her focus was completely on her tasks, so many movies had been playing in the background those two days. Crying over fictional people’s lives seemed to be just what she needed to fool herself about what she really wanted to cry over. When she had gone into her room to clean it though, it had gotten tough and Sunday had unfortunately ended with her sobbing as she clutched onto that Clockwork Orange shirt she’d never given him back.

So when Ella stepped foot into her spotless house, she started to panic over what she was meant to do so as to not drive herself insane for the rest of the day.

Breana solved that for her by calling her. She was currently on the way to Indianapolis with the lads and she’d been trying hard not to stress herself about Ella’s lack of answer to her texts throughout the entire day.

Unlike Alex, Breana hadn’t gotten the version of Ella who was acting like nothing had happened; she’d gotten a sad and absent Ella on the phone every time she called, and the texts would always come late and short. The model was actually surprised about how well Ella was playing it off to Alex, chipper on the phone to him and smiling hard, making sure to reply on time and joking with him through texts.

She was trying to fool everyone else into thinking everything was alright, and the only one who actually saw how broken and despaired she was, was Breana.

“Hey babe, I thought you were gonna text me during your lunch break.” Bre said softly when Ella picked up the facetime call.

Ella could see that she was hidden away in the back lounge of the bus so she felt relieved that she could let herself break down freely in front of her best friend.

“Sorry, completely forgot. Everyone was trying to ask me what was wrong and to cheer me up and I was focused on not crying in front of everyone.” All the tears she’d been holding back started to silently run down her cheeks, it made her feel so pathetic but she needed to cry after trying so hard not to all day.

Bre’s face fell at the sight and she wanted to be there with her and hold her all night, console her and tell her it’d be alright. After all, Alex still hadn’t mentioned seeing Alexa in New York so it felt like Ella was worrying about a phantom menace.

“It’s okay. Let it out, hun.” The model sighed when she watched Ella drop her head and start quietly sobbing, her shoulders shaking as she wept. “Why don’t you– Have you thought about asking him?” Bre asked wholeheartedly, thinking that Ella subtly asking him about it would lead to him honestly giving her the answers she needed.

But Ella was long gone in psyching herself into the worst situations, so there was no way in hell that she’d risk her own heart all over again by asking him about it. There was no way she could ask without exposing herself and she had no idea if she could ever come back from getting her heart broken by Alex again.

It was way different this time, nothing like what had happened in 2012 but exactly because of that is that Ella was terrified to risk losing him now that he meant so much more to her.

Just thinking about how much she loved him was enough for her to cry a little harder as she shook her head before lifting it up to look at Breana through the screen. “I have thought about it but I won’t do it. I can’t just ask him without making it obvious that I’m in love with him and then what? If he’s actually considering it with Alexa like everyone is raving about online then, what? I do my best to ignore the heartbreak so I don’t ruin the friendship?”

“Ella, he’s not said a thing about Alexa and we’ve all talked about New York multiple times these past few days.” Breana explained with a sigh, hoping her words would help settle Ella even if it was just slightly.

“Yeah, well. Maybe he’s hiding it. Maybe something happened and he hasn’t said anything ‘cause everything in Tennessee is too fresh and you’d all shit on him for it.” Ella was reeling by then and she knew it but everything that was being said online about the pair getting back together was making her come up with every and any theory that would back it up.

She was trying to get ahead of the big reveal and make herself numb to the future heartbreak, getting herself ready for the worst possible outcome. She was still trying to come to terms about the fact that this most likely meant losing him for good. There was no way she’d be strong enough to endure seeing them together while she was stuck longing for what could never be.

“You need to stop reading the bullshit people say.” Breana raised her brows at her with a stern look on her face, knowing Ella had gone on Twitter again and read what people were saying like she had on Sunday after finding Alex’s shirt in her wardrobe. “If you don’t ask him, I will. So you’ve got until the weekend to do it.” The model gave her the ultimatum and it was enough for Ella to scoff loudly and frown.

“You can’t do that.” Ella said breathlessly, the hurt clear in her voice.

Bre shrugged, “You’re driving yourself mad, Ellie. I can’t keep seeing you like this because of something that’s clearly not happening.” Her words didn’t matter because Ella was still looking at her like she’d just stabbed her in the back, “What happened with everything your parents said? Don’t you remember huh? They were right, in every single thing they said. And your mom is right too, you should tell him even if it’s through the phone.”

Ella shook her head, “Not happening anymore. Sorry Bre.”

Breana gave her a sad smile, “It’s not me you should be saying sorry to, Ella. The only one you’re hurting right now is yourself.”

Those words hit Ella like a punch in the gut, her breath hitched in her throat as she tried not to sob loudly and she let her gaze drop to her hands. She couldn’t handle much more anymore today so she shook her head and hastily let Breanna go, “I’m gonna make myself something to eat, shower and go to bed. I’ll text you in the morning.”

Breana’s sigh was full of anguish for her best friend but she knew it’d be worse to push, she’d only drive Ella into a worse state and she needed to relax. “Okay babe. Don’t forget to text me yeah? I’ll be waiting for your messages.”

Ella only hummed with a curt nod, her gaze wandering around her desolate kitchen for a second before facing Bre again and saying goodbye, “I promise I’ll text. Love you.”

“Love you.” Breana reciprocated and ended the call herself.

When she came out of the back lounge to where everyone was hanging out, they all picked on the sadness that had overcome her expression.

“Y’alright?” Jamie asked Bre as she sat down next to Matt, making the drummer turn to look at her fiance and when he caught the look on her face, he hugged her tightly and dropped a kiss on her cheek.

“Yeah, yeah. Just tired.” The model excused and the guitarist nodded. Everyone caught her up on their conversation then, slowly managing to get little giggles and soft smiles from her as the time went and they got closer to the state of Indiana.

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The following day, Ella woke up to the ringing of her phone. An incoming facetime call from none other than Alex. A call that made her frown and startle awake since it was half past six in the morning and all she could think about was that the early call meant an emergency.

But Alex’s chipper, “Hiya, darling.” proved nothing close to an emergency had happened.

“Hi, sweetness.” Ella replied breathlessly. Seeing him ready for the day with his hair yet to be gelled back with a bright smile on his face that not even the cigarette that he was smoking could hide, made her want to scream. “You’re very smiley today.” She teased him the best she could, trying to ignore the ache in her heart that got more prominent when the memory of the article and the stupid online chat weaved through into the forefront of her mind.

He hummed like he was aware. After all, his cheeks hurt from how hard he’d been smiling for the past hour. “I’ve got good news.”

“Oh?” Was all that Ella managed to say, her signal to get him to start talking.

But all Alex did was smirk and hum, “Mhm.”

She knew what he was doing, so she rolled her eyes as she let herself fall back onto bed and rest her head on the pillows, “You’re gonna make me ask, really?”

“I am.” Alex cheekily replied, his smirk only getting bigger at the prospect of having her guess what it was.

From the way he was smiling, Ella had a feeling it had to be about his imminent move to Los Angeles, so she grinned back shyly and softly asked as excitement started brewing in her chest, “Is it about the house?”

“Yes.” He answered with joy, but still steered her into guessing.

So she continued with her guesses, “Have you got it?”

He nodded eagerly before explaining further, “Signed an hour ago and my agent got the keys so yes, it’s all mine now.”

“Fuck off!” Ella gasped and sat back up on her bed, “So you’re moving here for the holidays?” Tour was meant to finish mid November in South America so that’d mean that he was gonna be moving to LA just in time for the holidays and that made her incredibly nervous to think about.

But Alex shook his head and clarified, “Moving in this weekend actually.”

The notion had Ella breathless and wide-eyed. “What?!” Ella stuttered when she managed to stop holding her breath in shock. He was moving in that very weekend and all she’d done the past week since she’d last seen him was sob over some stupid paparazzi pictures of him and his ex.

“Yeah, well, our last festival this month is tomorrow so I’d be flying over to LA on the 26th and moving in until we have to go back on tour on the 2nd.” Alex explained easily. He’d bought his ticket back to LA with the rest of the group only a few minutes before and the first person he had to tell was Ella.

“Wait, so you’re coming back in two days?” Ella was truly shocked at this all, she kept blinking as if wanting to properly wake herself up because it all just didn’t feel real.

Alex flashed her a toothy smile, “We all are. Bought our tickets about ten minutes ago.” Seeing her getting even more surprised by that information made him want to coo out loud, she was so cute. He wanted to kiss her face over and over and over again.

“Holy shit.” Ella muttered under her breath, getting up from bed and walking towards her dresser to actually start getting ready to go to work.

The singer chuckled at her but attentively watched her every move on the screen as he continued, “And I’m gonna have everyone over on Saturday for a housewarming party.”

Ella nodded, her throat becoming dry at the thought of only having four days to mentally prepare to see him in person again after the torment she’d kept to herself. She had no idea how she’d be able to hide it from him in person, it was already hard to hide it from him through texts and facetime. But in person? She could only hack acting okay for an hour maybe, there was no way she could play it off for a whole afternoon.

“Right. Let me know if you want me to take anything. Is it gonna be like Matt and Bre’s?” She asked just to be prepared for who she’d have to hide from. If it was just the lads and the girls then it’d be tricky but at least she’d have Breana to lean onto and she’d feel more comfortable.

Her heart stopped when Alex shook his head and said, “A bit bigger. Steve and Davey are flying in with us so Mia, Davey’s girlfriend, is gonna be there too. Miles is gonna come as well and some other friends we have in the city.” He took a pause to think about the list he’d written down inside his mind and he added, “Oh, Josh is coming too and I think Alexa is coming over too.”

At the mention of that name, Ella felt herself go cold and pale. She was so glad she’d decided to move off camera as she went to grab a pair of jeans just as he said that.

“Darling?” Alex asked with a frown when he didn’t hear a thing coming from her.

Ella took a few deep breaths as she tried not to burst out crying, the wound she’d been opening up more and more with her overthinking for the past week felt like it had started bleeding all over again and she was trying her best not to cry in pain.

Clearing her throat, she rose back up and appeared on the screen. She kept her head hanging low so he wouldn’t see her failed attempt of a smile, she lifted her jeans up and chuckled dryly before excusing herself with, “Sorry, was getting my clothes for work.”

His eyes went wide when he realized he had once again forgotten about time zones and the fact that it was a Tuesday morning. “Shit, darling. Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you and make you late for work.”

She finally looked up and waved him off, “You actually helped ‘cause I’m pretty sure I snoozed my alarm.” Moving out of frame, Ella started changing and she was so glad she could use the excuse of getting changed for him not to complain about her not showing her face like he always did when she tried to hide from him. “Miles and Josh are coming?” She asked first, feeling like him mentioning Alexa first was the best opening she’d get to ask about it without having to risk her heart.

“Yeah, you know Miles wouldn’t miss this one after not being able to come to Matt’s. And Josh has been trying to convince me to move over here since we met him back in the Humbug days.”

Ella chuckled as she pulled the jeans up her legs and buttoned them up, “That’s a long while he took to convince you.”

Alex hummed, “Well, he wasn’t the one to convince me in the end.” He hoped she’d get what he was trying to say, his smirk was a clear sign that he meant she was the sole reason he decided to finally do it.

But Ella wasn’t looking at her phone, she was staring at herself in the mirror and giving herself a quick mental pep talk as she geared up to ask, “You said Alexa is coming too? Alexa Chung?”

“Ah yes.” Alex nodded, “Bumped into her in New York the other day and we were chatting for a bit. I told her I was moving here soon and she said she was due a visit to LA so I should let her know if I was doing anything once I got the house.” He hoped he was playing it cool because in all honesty, most of the talk he’d had with Alexa was about how he was trying to get the house as soon as possible to finally be able to get things moving in the right direction with Ella.

“Oh, right. Right.” Ella said casually, like she wasn’t trying to figure out if Alexa had said that as a friend or if she’d been flirting.

“She’s excited to meet you, you know?” Alex continued, unaware of how Ella was struggling to take in the new information, “She’s seen your pictures and she loved them. Think she said something about wanting you to take her pictures, she loved the ones you took at Katie’s last year. Said you were brilliant.”

Deep breathe in and out. Ella tried not to think about how it’d be to not only meet her in four days but make peace with the fact that anything she would’ve hoped to have with Alex would also be gone in four days.

“I’m sure we can arrange something on Saturday.” Ella hoped she sounded like she was smiling, but the mirror reflected a wince instead of a grin and she wanted to scream at herself for being so pathetic.

She walked back into frame, watching Alex take one last drag of his cigarette and toss it to the ground. A pang of hurt flooded her system and she smiled sadly knowing that she’d soon lose all of this, purely because of her inability to just speak and make herself vulnerable to take a chance on it.

“Sweets, I unfortunately gotta go now but I’m so fucking happy for you and I really can’t wait to see you this weekend.” Despite the hurt, the love she felt for him shined through and it showed on her face. On her eyes shining as she watched him smile at her, on the sweet grin she offered him.

“Me too darling. I’ve missed you way too much.” Alex admitted with a loopy smile. He almost could already feel her arms around him as he clutched onto her when he’d see her next. Just a few more days and he could have her by his side again. And hopefully his plan would work out and he would be able to kiss her again, and again, and again. “Love you. I’ll see you soon.”

“Love you.” Ella replied, a hint of sadness behind the words, like she was mourning the loss of its actual meaning already. The loss of the opportunity to let him know how he’d driven her mad, and how she’d been so close to just risking everything in hopes he felt the same way. “See you soon.”

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Ella had been incredibly thankful that she’d gotten ahead of herself with her workload those three days she was back at the office because on Tuesday, after Alex’s call, she’d barely been able to concentrate enough to finish what she’d left halfway done on Monday.

She’d been frantically texting Breana all day, not knowing what to do with the fact that Alexa was meant to show up on Saturday along with everyone else. How could she even keep her emotions at bay when she was gonna be there too? It was impossible, and if it was any other case, she’d avoid the event altogether but she couldn’t. She just couldn’t because not only would Alex get suspicious and she’d feel like she would be letting him down, she wanted to know straight away if anything between the singer and the model were to happen.

Breana had let Ella talk all about it when she called her as soon as she got back home from work. The model had only a bit of time to talk to her best friend before she had to leave to see the band take on the stage of Summerfest to end the opening night of the festival with a ninety minute long set.

But before she could go, Bre left Ella with a few questions that she’d be pondering an answer to for the next twenty four hours.

“What if nothing happens between them on Saturday?” The model started saying after Ella had gone on a rant about what she’d have to do once Alex took Alexa back the day of the housewarming party. “What are you gonna do if there’s nothing going on there? Are you gonna waste another opportunity?”

“I doubt nothing will happen, Bre.” Ella sighed, rubbing her face in exhaustion. She needed her brain to stop for a bit so she could rest from the worries that filled her insides with dread.

Bre scoffed, “He said he bumped into her and they chatted about him moving to Los Angeles. How’s that a sign of them getting back together?”

“I don’t know, okay?!” Ella said loudly, wincing when Breana’s face fell at the volume and hostility of her response. “M’sorry. God, I’m so annoying. I’m sorry, I’ll stop bothering you with the same thing. I promise I’ll stop.”

“I just want you to stop with the bullshit.” Breana said frankly, “Stop with the stupid theories and the lack of security on where you stand with him. Alex doesn’t ever stop talking about you, he always has you in mind when even the smallest things happen. He smiles like a fucking fool whenever you text him and I know he’s texting you because I ask him every time and it’s always you. This is their fourth festival since Bonnaroo and I bet he’s going to say it doesn’t compare to Tennessee like he’s said with the other three before.”

Ella just stood there silent as she took in every word Breana said, the model took her silence as a sign to continue, “And why are you even waiting until Saturday for?! We all land tomorrow night and he’s going to his new house straight away so he’ll most likely be getting everything ready on Friday. You’ve got all of Friday to go see him and try your luck. You just gotta do it, Ellie.” In Breana’s mind, this was Ella’s chance and it would be such a shame to miss it, “Just go and tell him on Friday, spare you the hurt and the stress of waiting until Saturday for something—which isn’t fucking happening, by the way—to happen.”

There hadn’t been a chance for Ella to reply since Kelly and Katie came by the trailer to get Breana out and take her to the balcony since the guys were about ten minutes away from taking over the stage. Ella had to put on a smile and say a quick hello and goodbye to the girls she also missed tons, and then pretend like the call ending didn’t mean she was gonna go crazy with her own thoughts for the rest of the night.

Ella had fallen asleep thinking about every word Breana had said and she woke up to the same internal debate she’d been having all night. Would it be better if she just got it out of the way? If she’d just told him and have him let her down easy if he didn’t reciprocate. Have the chance to avoid seeing everyone on Saturday if it meant what she was dreading was actually happening, to start distancing herself before the damage was irreparable, to give herself a head start on the pain it’d bring her to lose everything that came with Alex.

There was a point during Thursday where everything changed from being unsure of telling him to knowing it was the right thing to do and it might’ve been the fact that he texted her, right as she was packing everything up to leave the office and head back home, to let her know that he was boarding his flight and it’d only be a matter of hours before they were in the same city.

She figured it was her lack of patience and the overwhelming need for answers that flipped the switch inside her. There was no chance she’d let this opportunity pass and she’d just have to deal with the consequences when the time came. She just needed to stop being afraid and face whatever would come with the strength she knew she could find inside herself.

For fucks sake, she’d been cheated on twice in her life already and she’d come out of the other end alive and well. And she’d survived it. What would another heartbreak do to her? Probably break her, realistically, but there was no way of knowing if she didn’t do what she needed to do.

Her appetite was gone by the time she finished cooking herself dinner but she’d tried eating as she watched a movie and it had worked to eat most of her plate. But she was fully spent by ten in the evening so she quickly washed the dishes and got herself ready for bed.

It wasn’t until she went to grab her phone from her coffee table that she realized Alex had texted her about half an hour before, her heart hammered inside her chest as she read what he’d sent.

(26/06/2014 21:43) Just landed and we’re waiting for our bags! Seeing the new house very soon. Do you want pictures or would you like a proper tour when you come? Cannot wait to see you darling xxxx

His words made her giggle like a fool, she bit her bottom lip as she went over his message again and walking back to her room, she threw herself on her bed and typed a response.

(26/06/2014 22:18) Think I’ll endure a few more days of intrigue and take you up on an actual house tour on Saturday. I missed you sweetness, can’t wait to hug you!! xxx

Ella couldn’t believe he was back in Los Angeles again, and she fell asleep with a grin on her face and her phone in hand as she waited for him to reply. A reply that she wouldn’t see until she woke up the next morning.

(26/06/2014 23:36) I’ll have you come earlier on Saturday then, give you proper time to take it all in. It’s cosy here, I think you’d really like it. You’ve no idea how much I just wanna have you here already and give you a cuddle. Love you darling xxxxx

As she got ready for work, she kept reading and rereading the message. Breana’s words echoing inside her mind as her gaze went over the text again and again.

It was Friday and this was it. It was the one day she could just get it over and done with, and it hurt thinking of treating the love she felt for him like a burden that she had to try and strip off herself as soon as she could, but it was for her own good. To know where she stood, to deal with what he was gonna choose to do.

But knowing what she’d decided to do and having to endure a full work day with it in mind had her going crazy. Every time Lydia would come in to check things with her, she was half distracted and had to ask the PA to repeat herself. She felt awful for it but she couldn’t help it, and she’d apologized for it multiple times.

By the time she came back from her lunch break and she’d been trying to properly answer emails for an hour, Ella called it a day and left. Ben and Aaron got a hasty apology for her early leave that they waved off, and they watched her all but run out of the office with confused looks on their faces.

Ella was just driving. She had no idea where she was going because after twenty minutes on the road, she knew it wasn’t the way back to her house, but she kept driving until she realized she’d taken the 101 freeway up to Hollywood Hills.

She made a quick detour when she knew she’d been driving the way to Matt and Bre’s, knowing Alex’s new house was a few minutes away from there. It would be bad if she went there empty handed, and she really needed an excuse to ease into whatever the conversation would turn out to be.

Fuck, fuck, fuck! She cursed over and over in her mind as she got off the freeway onto Hollywood Boulevard and went to the first grocery store she could find.

Two bottles of Pinot Noir later, Ella rushed back into her car and pulled up Alex’s new address—luckily he’d sent it to her with days in anticipation for her to know how much time it’d take her to get there on Saturday.

Merely fifteen minutes it took her to finally pull up into Alex’s driveway and when she put her car in park, her hands started shaking. She really had to clutch tightly onto the necks of the wine bottles not to drop them, one on each hand with her bag forgotten somewhere inside her car. In the haste to walk up to his front door she’d just grabbed her car keys and the wine bottles.

After having come all the way there, Ella rushed herself to ring the doorbell. There was no fucking way she was going to psych herself out of it when she was already there. Though going back inside her car and dashing back home to drink the wine alone as she cried over how much of a pussy she was being deep inside sounded very tempting.

But there was no chance for her to decide on taking that route for the front door opened and a sweaty and surprised Alex greeted her with the biggest of smiles.

Despite the house coming furnished for him to move in straight away, Alex had spent the entire day making it feel like home. Taking it upon himself to do some cleaning around and putting some clothes away that he knew he’d have to pack up again to leave back on tour, but he’d wanted to feel settled already.

As he’d been filling the drawers of his dresser with trousers and jeans, he remembered there were many things he needed to go through with his plan of the perfect way to finally tell Ella everything, and so he’d left his suitcase half unpacked and gone to the grocery store to buy everything he’d need to cook her a lovely dinner.

He knew he was going to try cooking her favorite pasta, making it a candlelit dinner and just giving it the old romantic fool to pour his heart and soul out for her. Like she deserved to get after all this time. There was no way he was leaving her again without properly trying to push their relationship in the direction he’d been longing for so long.

And Alex was planning on doing it all tonight, to give her a call and ask her to please join him that night, he was thinking he would probably tell her to come over a day early to give her that tour he’d promised. If he wanted this to work out, it couldn’t be hours before everyone else was due to come over.

But it seemed like she had beat him to it, bringing wine with her as well.

“Ella!” His eyes were wide and so was his toothy grin. Seeing her in front of him again flooded his system with relief, a feeling that escaped him when he saw the color drain from her face and the clear anxiety on her face. “Hi, darling. I wasn’t expecting you here today. Y’alright?”

Damn him and his ability to read her so easily. She stumbled through her thoughts, shaking her head and taking half a step backwards as she said, “Sorry, I-” What was she meant to say? How would she even begin the conversation?

Her gaze fell down to the wine bottles and she remembered why she’d gotten them in the first place, “Ermmmm, are you busy? I brought a gift…” She looked up at him and gave him a smile, moving the bottles up and showing them to him.

The joy she felt when seeing him in person just a few feet away from her was genuine, and she thought that was why he hadn’t questioned it. Alex gave her a tooth rotting sweet smile as he cooed, “Ah you’re so sweet.” and waved her inside, opening the front door wider and inviting her inside the new place, “Come in.”

Ella’s stomach flipped at the thought of what was about to happen and suddenly the excuse of bringing the wine as a gift felt like a mistake. “Actually, I–” She wanted to be sick. All the words she had been thinking about saying for the past twenty four hours rose up her throat and she was trying to hold back the impending word vomit.

“Fuck.” She cursed under her breath as she only took a few steps inside the house. There wasn’t even a moment for her to take in the beauty of the place since the second she heard the door closing behind her, she turned to Alex and gave him an awkward smile to let him know, “Erm, I wasn’t planning on staying long.”

His brows shot up and he smirked, amused at the sudden change in behavior. He still found her so fucking endearing, she was like a little mouse trapped in a corner by a predator. “You just drove over an hour to bring me a bottle of wine and leave me to drink it alone?” He knew the traffic must’ve been awful on the way here, and he wasn’t letting her go without getting an explanation for the way she was acting.

A few beats of silence passed before she answered, “Yes?” the inflection of her voice going up so her affirmation sounded like a question.

If she wasn’t gonna say it without being explicitly asked, then fine, he would ask. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.” She hastily replied, way too fast to appear normal. She winced, holding her breath for a few seconds before reiterating, shaking her head and chuckling dryly at herself, “Nothing! Sorry, this is stupid.”

“Ella.” Alex said a bit more sternly then, “What’s going on?”

Her eyes met his and she watched the determination he had to get an answer. She couldn’t turn back anymore, there was no chance she could lie her way out of this one, to give him some white lie that he’d believe was the reason for her awkwardness.

It was right then, it just had to be done. Taking a deep breath, she started, “Okay, erm… I gotta tell you something.” Alex frowned and opened his mouth to speak but she got ahead of him and pleaded with him, “But please let me finish before you say anything, okay?” She would burst out crying and lose her ability to speak if he was to cut in the middle of the flood of words that she knew was coming soon.

But the singer was starting to worry and his amused smirk was long gone, exchanged for a deep frown and distress clear in those brown eyes of his, “What’s happened?”

“Alex.” Ella said in a sigh, begging silently for him to do what she was asking for. Before she could make a run for the door and escape, leaving it all a mess behind her.

Alex pressed his lips together and nodded, “Sorry, go on.”

“No, don’t apologize.” She was the one to frown this time, her chest felt so tight and it was getting uncomfortable. “Okay, fuck.” Every word she’d rehearsed was slipping away from her mind, and in its place a knot of thoughts stayed. Knot that if she didn’t manage to untangle in the next minute, she’d start crying out of frustration at herself. “Wait.”

Alex nodded, willing to wait as she gathered herself to start saying whatever it was that was bothering her. He had no idea what it was but he was already thinking of ways to help her. There were only so many solutions he could come up with when he didn’t know the situation, “Is everything okay? What can I do? Do you need my help with anything?”

“No. I–” She started, but before she could continue trying to ask for some more time to think about it, Alex spoke again.

“Then what’s wrong, darling?” It was so sickeningly sweet, the way he walked up closer to her and reached his hand out to grab hers, the way his brows furrowed even more but that look in his eyes prevailed, the one that she’d started to read like something close to devotion.

She couldn’t get a grasp on her logic anymore, and her words escaped her in a loud manner that made him freeze in his place, “I’m tired!”

Alex was beyond confused, a quiet “What?” leaving his lips in a split second.

But Ella’s eyes started filling up with tears when she continued, “I’m so exhausted from this, Alex!”

Completely forgetting what he’d promised just a few seconds before, Alex went ahead and tried to ask for an explanation, “What do you–?”

Ella interrupted him before he could finish the question, giving him the explanation he was looking for with a passion that burned her insides, “This! All of this! The cruel back and forth that leaves me confused.”

She just needed to let it all out now, and that she’d do. Not that she could control the way her mouth moved ahead of her brain, words leaving her before she could even process her own thoughts, “I don’t want you to go again because I feel like my heart’s being ripped out of my chest every time and, fuck, I’m in love with you and I was so close to telling you that after the festival but then you had to leave. And then just two days later, you’re seen with Alexa in New York and everyone is talking about how ‘the IT couple is back’ and mentioning me in some stupid article just to completely disregard me like I’m some disposable thing to you, so that they could go on and on about you and her.”

Her voice broke by the end, remembering everyone’s excited words when it came to talking about the possibility of them two getting back together. She hated it, she really hated how badly it got her so she let it out too, “And I hate it! I fucking hate it! ‘Cause I just want you to be around but you can’t and it fucking hurts. All the damn time. But I’m never brave enough to just fucking tell you.”

Tears rolled down her cheeks, hot trail from the corners of her eyes down to her neck, she ignored them as best as she could to continue with her rant, “But now you’ve moved here and it’s too real, and I was scared of letting you know how stupidly in love I am with you but I just can’t lose you to somebody else again.”

She huffed as she shook her head, like a child showing her determination on the matter, “So I have to risk it. I have to risk getting rejected, ruining our friendship, losing you entirely and I–”

A sob managed to rip through her at the thought of this being the last time she’d see him, of everything ended like this, “I don’t wanna lose you but I can’t keep it to myself any longer. And I’m sorry but I just–” The words tangled on the tip of her tongue then, the avalanche of words abruptly ending after all of that.

Alex was breathless, his chest heaving as he stared at her with wide eyes, his mouth agape and his throat dry. He could barely muster the soft, “Ella, I–” he let out.

But he didn’t say anything else, he just stared at her with his brows furrowed like he was confused and it all dawned on her.

It had been such a mistake to do it like this, she’d needed to think it through properly and not throw herself into it as if she had a way with words, as if she could make it cute and nice and enchant him with an improvised speech.

It had been a mess and it was all fucking ruined. “No. Don’t.” She shook her head, not even wanting to meet his gaze anymore. “Oh fuck, this was so stupid.” She wanted to hit her head against the wall, to smash the bottles she was still holding in her hands, “I’m so stupid.” She cried out loud before shaking her head again and sniffling, breathing deeply and trying to swallow the knot in her throat.

She managed to look up, the singer looked blurry through her tear filled eyes. She was glad she couldn’t really make up his face then so she took a step up to him and pushed the bottles towards his chest, “This is pathetic. Just take the wine.” But he didn’t even try to make the effort to receive the bottles so pressed her lips together as she silently cried even more, turning on her heels to walk up to his kitchen island and leave the wine there.

In a hurry, she started walking back towards the front door, shaking her head once again as she tried to think of how badly it had gone but it was all blurry. Yet, Alex’s silence was enough to know it had gone terribly wrong.

“I’ll see you on Sunday if you even wanna keep me on the guest list.” She mumbled, almost by the door, but he quickly walked up to her, his hand stretching out to what she thought was opening the door for her. She watched the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows and she cried to herself again in frustration. How could it have gone so wrong? “Sorry. You probably were busy, doing stuff and–”

But instead of his fingers wrapping around the handle of the door, they wrapped around her wrist to turn her around, so she could see the wicked smile on his face as he asked, “Why now?”

She was fucking trying not to audibly sob and he was smirking at her? Ella narrowed her eyes as she asked, “Pardon?”

“Why now?” He repeated his question but that smirk only tugged further on the corners of his mouth and that to Ella only meant he was making fun of her. Suddenly, the heartbreak was mixing with rage and all she could do about it was run away. So she tugged away from his grasp, her arm slipping away from his hold but he was fast to catch her wrist again as he sternly said, “No, Ella.”

She thrashed again, trying to pull away from his hold, “Alex, please let me go.” Another wave of tears flooded her eyes.

But he shook his head and he sounded breathless when he replied, “No. Just give me a second.”

Ella scoffed, pulling hard enough to escape his hold again, but this time her gaze was harsher and her words sounded venomous, “Why? So you can let me down easy and send me back home? So you can exchange me for another one of your models like you’ve done before?”

Alex ignored the way her words stung, taking a big step towards her and cupping her neck with his right hand to make her look at him. Her eyes brimmed with angry tears broke his heart and the way she was staring at him with rage that was almost palpable had him pressing his fingers a bit tighter around her neck.

Her mouth opened with a gasp at the pressure and he smirked. His left hand came up to wipe away a tear that rolled down her cheek before it could fall down to rest on her waist, where he clutched her tightly and pressed her against him.

His tongue poked out in between his lips to lick them softly, and he smiled even harder when he saw her gaze fall on his mouth. He was almost drooling at the thought of tasting her mouth again, but this time it’d be so much better with everything out in the open, with his heart out for her to finally take in her hands, because it had been hers for so long she just had to hold it close to her chest.

He shook his head softly, denying the things she’d said were about to happen. He wanted to scream out of happiness, cheer and celebrate finally being able to say it out loud for her to hear, “So I can process that this isn’t just another one of my dreams and tell you that I fucking love you too.”

Without giving Ella a second to properly react to his words, Alex caught her lips between his and their mouths melted in a kiss that contrasted so much to the ones they’d shared before. Because it was raw and with a passion that they’d been trying to hide for so long finally revealed. It was needy and devoted, their fingers clutching onto each other tightly and harshly, almost sure they’d be leaving marks but nothing sounded more fulfilling.

They could finally bare themselves to the other, proudly wear the fact that they were each other’s like a medal. Loud moans slipped from their mouth as the knowledge ringed in their heads. They kissed harder, deeper, running out of breaths.

“Alex…” Ella panted as she pulled back, trying to get some oxygen back in her lungs as fast as she could, the need to have his mouth on hers too intense to even give her body what it needed to survive.

All she needed was him. Only him.

“Ella…” Alex whispered back, his forehead pressing against hers with his eyes closed, just taking in the proximity—the way they were taking each other’s breaths, the brush of their noses as they gasped for air.

“Don’t stop.” She begged, her eyes opening to see him and plead with them as well as with her words, “Please.”

His eyes fluttered open, being met with her green eyes that made him weak in the knees. “Never.” He mumbled back. She had him entirely at his mercy, he would do anything she asked and more.

Alex pounced on her lips again with desperation. He leaned in, sucking the air out of her mouth, licking away any remaining sanity. Her lungs burned. Greedy, his hands fell down her body until he grabbed her ass. He gave it a harsh squeeze, eliciting a moan out of her, before clutching the backs of her thighs and swiftly picking her up off the ground.

A squeal fell from her lips when he lifted her and she wrapped her legs around his hips quickly. She whimpered at the feeling of his hardening cock brushing her already aching core. He walked backwards blindly, cursing under his breath as she rolled her hips into him, begging for friction. She let a delighted giggle out, kissing him harsher.

Ella’s arms wrapped around his neck, fingers running up his hair and pulling on the longer strands. She swallowed the groan that rumbled through his chest at the feeling of her nails scratching his scalp and tugging his hair. His steps got quicker then and he only stopped when he felt the edge of the settee against the back of his legs.

Sitting down carefully, he settled on the settee with Ella straddling him. His growing bulge was even more obvious then, and she let her legs spread a bit more so she’d be deliciously pressed against his hardness.

“Fuck, Ella,” was his first reaction, breathy and solemn from his lips. She nodded, finding his mouth again, already addicted.

The brush of his tented jeans on her clothed clit felt heavenly, her own denim shorts only adding to the way the friction was making her increasingly dizzy. She had to break the kiss to gasp loudly. A cheeky grin teased his mouth, only to be wiped away for a moan as she rolled her hips. His hands dug at her thighs, encouraging her, guiding her.

Ella tried to catch her breath, but it was knocked out of it at the sight of Alex. Pupils blown, lips swollen, hair disheveled. They were panting, both stuck with the dilemma of not knowing if they should elongate the moment or hurry to the point they had been waiting so long for.

It had been barely eleven days since that cowboy party, and not even once had Alex stopped thinking about it. Not when he closed his eyes and he could still feel her fingers all over his body, the way she pressed against him and taunted him with the move of her hips, the taste of her lips and her tongue and the bruises she sucked on his skin.

But now he finally had her, and his expression which had been contorted in utter pleasure softened for adoration. He brought his hand up to brush a strand of her hair behind her ear, cupping her cheek right after. She leaned into his touch with a loopy smile, kissing his palm, her hips slowing down to an unhurried pace.

“You’re so beautiful.” The words came out soft, his breath hitting her parted lips as he leaned in again and they met in the middle for another kiss.

She cupped his jaw and wrapped an arm around his neck, pushing herself flush against him as she followed the pace he’d set for the dizzying kiss they were sharing. Her hips picked up speed again, making them moan into each other's mouth.

His quiet whimpers and moans were driving her mad. She just couldn’t wait to hear him properly, once and for all, coming undone for her.

Alex grabbed a handful of her ass, kneading her flesh harshly with his fingers, making her roll her hips rougher against him. Her mouth went slack at the pleasure rippling through her.

“Shit.” Ella shuddered, letting her head drop and moaning into his neck. She started a trail of sloppy open mouthed kisses there, her hands working through the buttons of his shirt until it was completely open and she had more skin to kiss.

She went back to kiss his lips first, but she rushed through it. Now that she had all that skin available, she was going to make sure to mark every inch of him so everyone knew he was hers.

She made her way down his jaw, his neck and even going behind his ear, enjoying a certain spot that had him bucking his hips up and breathlessly moaning. It wasn’t until she was sucking the skin on his collarbone that she knew she’d hit the jackpot. When she started marking up the place at the base of his neck, he let out a loud groan that made her smile.

She let go of the skin there, giving the soft red mark a peck to then look up at him, “You liked that, yeah?” Her smirk was big and proud on her face, already enjoying the way he’d become putty in her hands this easily.

“Yes. Fuck, Ella, I like everything you do to me.” Her hips rolled once more, him meeting the movement by thrusting upwards. “Especially that. God, darling, I fucking love it.” She chuckled, quicking her pace.

She peppered kisses on his collarbone again, smirk brushing his skin. “And do you love that?” She teased, trailing a hot tongue on his red skin. His chest rose and fell against her mouth.

“Yeah, but–” She nipped gently at his skin and he jumped, thrusting up into her. “Shit. But–” Ella hummed, encouraging him to go on like her wicked tongue wasn’t actively doing the contrary. Finally, Alex grew desperate, missing the feeling of her lips on his so he grabbed her by the neck, calloused fingers pressing tightly on its sides to pull her back up to meet his mouth.

Teeth clashed, as the air grew hotter around them, the kiss was messy and the smacking of their wet lips echoed inside his living room. Their hips went faster, meeting in the middle every time with a growing desperation, looking for relief until she stopped.

Ella hummed into his mouth before breaking the kiss again, “Let’s go to your room.” She needed more, so much more than just dry humping him over their clothes.

Her suggestion was met with an eager Alex, who wasted no time grabbing her by the ass and rushed through the hallway to go up to his room. Her smile was impossibly wide, he could feel it on his neck where she was hiding, leaving a few pecks as he walked up to the bedroom.

Alex didn’t even know how he had gotten to his room so quickly, barging through the door but taking his time to set her on the bed softly. And their lips met once again, it was a bruising kiss filled with urgency.

Yet, for the first time in their lives, they were in no danger of running out of time.

They’d finally said the words they’d been wanting to say and heard the ones they’d been waiting to hear. They had all the time in the world. Every minute of every day for as long as they wanted, and just from the way they were kissing, it seemed like forever was the only option.

Ella’s legs wrapped around his waist after Alex took her shoes off blindly, and she dug her feet on his ass to make his hips press against her throbbing cunt once more. He started rolling his hips then, thrusting into her and the kiss only got sloppier. She was growing breathless as he pressed his hardening cock against her clothed clit. Their moans grew louder, needier.

His hands started wandering, going from cupping her face down her neck and chest until they rested on each side of her waist. His fingers started fiddling with the edges of her shirt and they snaked beneath the fabric of it, slowly lifting it up. “This okay?” He asked, out of breath. She didn’t answer; instead, she pushed herself up enough for him to take it off her with ease.

The piece of clothing was lost somewhere on his bedroom floor, thrown away carelessly as his entire focus was on admiring her figure, exposed all for him.

Her black bra hugged her tits perfectly and when she let herself fall back down on the bed, they looked as if they were about to spill out of the bra. If Ella had anticipated her confession would’ve ended in this, she would’ve worn something much nicer—she cringed at the thought of the plain and simple black thong she was wearing—but it didn’t matter to Alex for he was jaw dropped at the sight of her.

“Fucking hell,” He mumbled before dipping his head to kiss a path over the valley of her breasts, his tongue coming out to lick her skin in a painfully slow pace. Her back arched as she moaned when he bit on the top of one of her tits. She got louder and squirmed even more when he repeated his actions on the other one.

“And this is all mine?” Alex asked breathlessly, eyes now on hers and she nodded with a loopy smile, her cheeks flushed from everything that was happening. “I’m so lucky.” He couldn’t wait to see her naked, to devote himself to giving every inch of her the attention she deserved.

His hand snaked between her back and the mattress, and there he found the clasp of the bra. With apt fingers he undid it and slowly peeled off the piece of clothing off Ella’s body. His breath hitched at the sight of her bare chest, her hardened nipples making his mouth water. “You’re killing me. You’re actually trying to kill me.” She flushed slightly, secretly pleased.

He couldn’t wait any longer to have his mouth on them. Flattening his tongue, he dipped his head to give a bold lick to one of her nipples, pointing the tip of his tongue to start flicking it. Ella squirmed beneath him, whimpering and moaning at the taunting touch. Her hand came to cradle his head, moving slowly up until she could tangle her fingers in his hair just as he latched his lips around her nipple and started sucking eagerly.

“Shit, Alex.” Ella managed in between gasps as he alternated between sucking and flicking.

He smirked at the sight of her, wanting to ruin her even more. So he let go of her nipple with a pop before he bit it.

A mewl fell from her lips at the pain his teeth inflicted on her sensitive nipple, her hips rolled in search of relief but he had her pinned down with the way his body was resting on top of her. She needed more of him, her cunt throbbed and leaked with arousal with everything he did.

“Alex!” And it came out as half a beg, half an order. Alex nodded against her, undeterred. Her need for more only got more intense when he started sucking bruises on her tits, biting and sucking and drinking in all the sweet sounds she let out as the pain of his abuse on her skin sizzled into dizzying pleasure.

“So good for me,” he promised. “Taking it all.” His tongue came to lick the blooming love bites, pecks on top of sore skin before he moved onto her other tit. Smirking proudly when she was just as responsive to his actions as she had been before. “So pretty. The best fucking girl with the best fucking tits.”

And he wouldn’t stop until she was whining in a high pitch. The sounds she made were music to his ears, only wanting to keep getting them out of her, “Alex. More. I need more.” She managed in between moans. She was clenching around nothing and it frustrated her, she loved what he was doing to her but she had a half mind to take over everything and let herself have her way with him just like she wanted already.

“Say please,” he singsung.

Desperate, “Please.”

“Soon,” Alex breathed, continuing his tantalizing trail of kisses and half hearted bites down her chest and stomach, smirking as he watched her through his lashes. Ella huffed and pushed him off her. He fell onto his back and she wasted no time to straddle him.

His shirt was still messily on him, barely hanging on his shoulders and becoming a burden more than anything. She grabbed onto his collar to pull him up until he sat on the mattress. Once his chest was pressed flush against hers, Ella pushed the shirt off him and tossed it behind her onto the floor.

Alex watched the way her eyes darkened with lust and mischief, a wicked smirk pulling at the corners of her mouth as her fingers moved slowly up his chest, brushing his shoulders and neck until she cupped his jaw with both her hands and pressed her lips on his. “My turn,” she said gleefully, kissing him again. Alex laughed, though indulged her.

Feeling his bare chest under her fingertips as she licked into his mouth made her patience run thin, she couldn’t keep kissing him without continuing to bruise his skin. The sight of the bruises she’d left on his neck a few minutes before made her mouth water with the need to leave more.

Ella got drunk off the whimpers and shaky moans Alex let out as she sucked harshly on his skin, his hips bucking every time she sunk her teeth into his flesh. He was a mess, clawing at the sheets as she abused his skin, and she fucking loved it. “I want to ruin you,” she revealed.

“Yeah?”

Making her way down with wet open mouthed kisses, she got right below his navel where his happy trail started and came down until it disappeared beneath his clothes. She licked a bold strip up the hair there, smirking when he cried out in pleasure and thrusted upwards so his bulge hit her tits.

“I want you to fucking beg.”

She left more kisses along the edge of his jeans, making him bite on his bottom lip to stop himself from being too loud. But that was exactly what she wanted, so she latched onto a patch of his skin there and started sucking harshly until his fingers came to tangle in her hair and pulled her off him.

He would definitely cum in his pants if she continued teasing him like that.

“Do you trust me?” She asked sweetly, batting her lashes at him. Putting on the innocence act to have him say yes to what she wanted to do. Not that she needed it, because he’d do anything she wanted now that he had her like this.

His mind was a mess and his words failed him so he only nodded. She tutted and shook her head as she started crawling up his body until their noses brushed and they couldn’t look anywhere else but into each other’s eyes.

“Words, baby.” She whispered, her voice low and sultry making him groan before nodding again.

This time his nod was accompanied by, “I do. I trust you.”

Ella hummed in satisfaction, and she turned her head slightly to the side to kiss the palm of his hand, which was still holding her head with his fingers tangled in the strands of her hair.

But for what she wanted to do, she needed him to drop his hold on her. So she held onto his wrist to pull his hand away and she peeled herself off and away from him.

His gaze followed her intently as she got off the bed and stood at the side of it, slowly undoing the button and zip of her shorts and pulling them down, making a whole show of undressing that only made Alex grow achingly harder inside his jeans.

His breath hitched in his throat seeing her like that, almost entirely bare for him. “You’re so fucking gorgeous,” he whispered. She grinned. She swayed her hips a little as she hooked her fingers on the edge of her underwear and without breaking eye contact, she shed herself of the last piece of clothing that kept herself hidden from him.

Alex whined from the back of his throat. “You’re not real. You were made to be my downfall.”

“Yes,” Ella agreed. To ruin him, to unravel him. Fully naked, she came back on the bed to straddle him again. Her slick core brushed against his bulge over his jeans and she smirked harder at the way he reacted, a whine leaving his lips, hips bucking up as his hands held her hips tightly, pressing her against him and keeping her there as she slowly rolled her hips on him. “I’ll make you fall, Alex.”

“You already have.” She smiled, raking a hand through his hair. His lips part, a quiet moan on his lips.

Ella loved the view she had, Alex fully at her mercy. She just couldn’t believe her luck; after all those years of thinking and fantasizing about it, she could finally have him like this.

“You look so pretty like this.” Her thumb rubbed at his cheek as she cupped it, leaning in until their breaths mixed together. Her fingers slowly moved down his face until she could wrap her fingers around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

Their lips met hungrily again, Alex had her naked on top of him and he wanted nothing more than take his jeans and underwear off and fuck her senseless, but Ella had other plans.

Her lips left his mouth to start kissing all over his face, each peck followed by some type of praise that he was loving. “Beautiful.” Smack. “Talented.” Smack. “Smart.” Smack. “Loving.” Smack. His heart swelled in his chest, the contrast between her shameless lustful behavior and the sweet words she kept uttering had him dazed. “And that nose,” she teased. With one last peck on his lips which Alex tried to elongate, Ella found his gaze and with the sweetest voice, asked him, “Can I ride your pretty face?”

His breath staggered hearing that, his cock twitching in his pants at the thought of what was about to happen. He nodded quickly like he had just a few seconds to answer before the offer was gone, and he added a breathless please when he remembered her telling him to use his words.

That was enough of a greenlight for Ella to push herself up on her knees and start shuffling up his body until she’d been hovering over his face. She would’ve kissed him once more if she wasn’t desperate to feel his mouth on her cunt already, if she wasn’t dripping and throbbing for his touch.

Alex’s lips parted at the sight of her slick cunt practically begging for him to latch his mouth on her. His hands ran up her thighs slowly until he rested them on her hips and he guided her a bit further up on the bed so her knees caged his head in place.

He was almost drooling, already imagining how sweet she’d taste on his tongue. But despite the growing burning need to lick up her folds already, he started kissing up the insides of her thighs, sucking and biting the skin like she now knew he loved to do and making her whimper and squirm in his hold.

There seemed to be no hurry in his mind, repeating the actions in that same agonizing pace on her other leg. By the time he got incredibly closer to her sopping cunt and her legs started to tremble from the teasing, she was ready to tell him off for it. She felt the way his hot breath left from so close to her core, a frustrated whimper fell from her lips.

Just when Ella looked down with a frown and her hand came down to tangle in his hair, he craned his neck up to lick a bold strip up her folds, wrapping his lips around her clit once he licked past her entrance.

He hummed at her taste, using his hands to pull her closer to his mouth just as he taunted, “Come closer, darling. You taste so fucking good.”

Without wasting more time, he started flicking his tongue up and down, her slick already dripping down his chin and mixing with his spit as he lapped and lapped like he was starved.

One of his hands left her hip and came down to her cunt, to spread her open so he could properly suck her clit, the pressure of it making her get louder and start pulling on his hair to bring him closer to her. “Need you. Fuck, Alex, keep doing that.”

He fucking loved it, the reaction only pushed him to getting more out of her. By that point, he was humping the air in search of some kind of relief. Her moans only made him drip in his jeans but he had no time to feel embarrassed at the pace in which he was ruining his pants, not when he had her sweetness all over his face.

He moved down, two fingers spreading her folds as he pointed his tongue and he started dipping it inside her sopping hole. Her back arched, breath hitching in her throat, “Fuck, yes Alex–” She could just keep saying his name as he started fucking her with his tongue, broken gasps and high pitched moans slipped past her lips and only got louder and more desperate when he started moving his head, causing his nose to flick at her clit with every thrust of his tongue inside her.

It was all so much. Not only what he was doing to her but the whole scene, it was so much better than she could’ve ever imagined and as he continued working his tongue in and out of her before lapping up at her arousal only to end up with him flicking and sucking on her clit, Ella was sure she wouldn’t last much longer.

“Oh God, oh God.” Ella rolled her hips on his face, grabbing her own breast and playing with the nipple. Pleasure rushed through her. “Fuck, Alex, you’re–”

The mix of her arousal and his spit was already dripping down his neck by the time he teased one of his fingers into the cunt. His mouth left her clit and the hot breath that came from it along with his gasp as her hole swallowed his finger with ease made her even more of a whining mess. “–Perfect,” she finally finished, though with much difficulty. “You’re perfect.”

He curled his finger inside her before drawing it back and the loss of the slight fullness had Ella crying out loud. So at the same time as he wrapped his lips around her clit again, he pushed two fingers inside her, curling them and making her legs shake and her hips rut as she leaned forward and held onto his headboard with a white knuckled grip.

The feeling of his skilled fingers curling inside her and his mouth sucking harshly on her clit made Ella erratically grind her hips against his face. “Alex! Yes! Yes!” She chanted breathlessly, every one of his actions stealing the breath from her lungs. She felt her orgasm so fucking close, her brain melted and every one of her filthy thoughts left her, “God, I fucking love your mouth! So eager, so greedy. Lapping at me like you’re starved, like you need me. It was made for me. Made to be between my thighs.” A throaty and long hum came from him, that vibrated against her and made her squeal in pleasure.

So he did it again, and again, along with picking up the pace with his fingers. “Made to worship me,” Ella blabbered on, mindless. “All perfect and hot and– Fuck, Alex–” The combination of it all threw Ella over the edge.

Profanities along with his name was all that he could hear from her as she came all over his mouth and face. Despite the tremble of her legs and the stuttering of her hips as she came, he didn’t stop. He couldn’t stop, not when he looked up at her and saw how fucking stunning she looked as she came. Her chest flushed and her tits bouncing as she rutted on his face, her mouth agape and brows scrunched up in pleasure, hair a mess falling on her shoulder and sticking to the sides of her face as a thin coat of sweat glazed her skin.

Riding out her high with that in mind, Alex kept his unrelenting pace until it made Ella’s knees weak and she had to be the one to pull him away from her cunt before she fell on his face and smothered him.

It wasn’t like Alex wouldn’t say that was the best way to go.

“That nose,” she cursed, shaking her head.

Her chest was heaving as she struggled to shuffle down his body, while he was hypnotized with how good she looked all fucked out. “I want to do that again. And again. And again. For the rest of my fucking life.” Ella chuckled at his words, still shortwinded. “I’m serious. I want that view forever.”

“Oh my– Fuck, c’mere,” Ella wrapped her hand around his neck as she looked at him, her cum all over his face. She hastily leaned in to kiss him and when she tasted herself, a loud moan came from her. It rumbled through her chest and she only got more desperate when she settled her hips on his and felt him rock hard in his jeans.

Her head spinned as a new wave of arousal flooded her system, as if she hadn’t just cum all over his face a few seconds before.

Sticking her tongue out, she lapped at the mess that had dripped down his neck. Lewd noises came from her as she tasted herself on his skin and when she got to his jaw, she wiped his chin with her thumb and brought it up to his mouth for him to suck. A smirk broke on her face when his wet swollen lips wrapped around her finger, eyes rolling back into his head and humming as he tasted the last bits of her arousal.

She admired him for a few seconds, her thumb brushing against his lips while she cupped his jaw and her other hand went up to brush his hair back. “See, I knew you were beautiful but you look even prettier with my cum all over your face.”

His cock twitched in his pants, her praises making him harder than he thought he could get from just words, but she was just so stunning like this, taking complete control over him and making a mess of him. He’d never considered himself submissive but fucking hell wouldn’t he willingly put himself at her mercy every time if that was what she wanted. The filthy words she’d been saying as she rode his face came to the forefront of his mind and he couldn’t help but point out the contrast between them and her sweet praise, it was just like the contrast of her sweet shy self and the Ella he was seeing now.

“God, you couldn’t be more perfect,” he whispered, barely registering the words left his mouth.

His hips bucked once again and his face fell into a pained expression when he brushed against her cunt. Ella pouted at the look on his face, feeling just how fucking hard he was and how he must be aching in those jeans, so she leaned in to peck his lips before saying softly, “Let me take care of you, yeah?” Alex whimpered when she rolled her hips once more as he nodded at her words. Again, she teased, “Words?”

“Please.”

“So polite.” He caught a glimpse of her smirk while she busied herself into kissing down his jaw and neck, down his chest until she was facing his bulge. With deft fingers, she undid the button and tugged down the zip, her fingers hooked on the edge of the denim to start peeling it off him and she smiled when he lifted his hips up to let her take them off him.

Alex was slightly relieved from the partial freedom, sighing as she kissed back up his chest and met his lips once more. But when she started rolling her hips slowly on his again, he knew that she was teasing him and he didn’t know how much of that he could take.

“Ella, please.” He mumbled in a broken moan when her hips rolled again.

Their lips brushed when she asked, “What do you want, baby?” Her hips stopped so he could form a coherent answer to her question.

Alex felt like he would explode at any second, so he just shook his head as he peeled his eyes open and stared into her eyes, “Anything. Just need you, darling.”

Biting her bottom lip, Ella took in every detail of his face. She sighed heavily before kissing him again. Leave it to him to sweet talk her into considering not teasing him and give him exactly what he wanted.

She could find some middle ground, so she enjoyed the slow trail of her mouth kissing down his chest and licking over the bruises she’d left there already. And she especially enjoyed hearing him whimper when she finally got to the band of his boxers and all she did was leave open mouthed kisses along it.

Taking some pity on Alex, Ella thought it had been enough taunting so she brought his boxers down, his hard cock springing free and slapping against his belly. He was swollen and heavy, red tip already leaking so much precum and her mouth watered at the sight, wanting nothing more than to take him in her mouth and gag on it but the need to continue teasing him a bit more was far stronger.

She moved back up to face him and he was about to complain but all the words died in his throat when she grabbed his chin and turned his head to the side so he could face her and said, “Spit in my mouth.” before parting her lips and sticking her tongue out for him to spit on.

“Fucking hell, Ella.” Alex cursed under his breath. He was sure she’d been made for him, this was something he hadn’t seen coming but fucking hell didn’t it make him want to kiss her lips until they were bruised and make her cum over and over until she couldn’t move out of bed. There was this animalistic need to give her everything he could give, until he could satiate the need of her.

Ella rolled her eyes and dug her fingers harshly into his face as if to hurry him and he snapped out of his trance to cup her jaw firmly, spitting into her mouth just like she’d requested. She hummed and closed her eyes in bliss when she felt his warm spit coating her tongue, closing her mouth to swallow it.

“Do it again.” She said, stealing Alex’s air from his lungs all over again, his cock twitching and he felt a bead of precum leaking out of the tip.

He spat in her mouth again but this time she didn’t swallow it, she shuffled down the bed to come back beside his cock and wrap her fingers around it, spitting on it and letting the mixture of her and Alex’s saliva dribble down his length until it hit the duvet.

“You’re filthy,” he whined, and it sounded like a praise.

Her thumb rubbed on the tip of his cock, smearing the precum down his length and starting to stroke him up and down slowly. Her eyes admired the way his cock looked thrusting in and out her fist, throat going dry at the thought of how it’d look like as he fucked her, but then she looked up and saw him already a flushed panting mess and she couldn’t help but stopping her movements to taunt him.

Alex groaned at the loss of the friction her hand brought on him and out of desperation, he started thrusting up into her hand to resume the pleasure that it had brought him. Ella smirked and started moving again, a very slow pace to have him do most of the work. “That’s it, fuck my fist.”

He whimpered, leaking more and more of his salty arousal as his pleasure made him shudder and stop being able to keep his eyes open. All he could think of was cumming, so he picked up his pace, his hips meeting her fist every time he thrusted up, “Oh Ella– Fuck!”

She could only watch him with her mouth agape, almost drooling and her cunt throbbing and clenching around nothing at the sight. She had to press her thighs together to get some kind of alleviation. “Yes Alex, just like that. Is this how you fucked yours huh? Is this how you fucked your fist to my pictures?”

Alex was desperate to orgasm, her statement almost flying past him. His brows furrowed, concentrated in the rhythm he had set for himself but he grew confused as to how she knew that. “Wha– Ah fuck! Who told you that?”

She chuckled at his lack of denial, “Who do you think?” She giggled at herself, finding it amusing that she’d brought this up in such a situation.

A string of profanities left him, as he felt himself growing closer and closer to his orgasm. His hips started stuttering and she tutted, “No, you’re not cumming yet babe.” Her fist left his cock, coming to rest on the mattress and a massive smirk showed on her face when his eyes went wide open and he started complaining.

“But Ella– Please, let me–” He choked on his words when her thumb brushed on his tip again and she brought the finger up to her mouth to suck. “Please, darling. I need it. Need you.”

She hummed, satisfied with his growing desperation and making a show of swiping her thumb over the tip of his cock again and moaning loudly at his taste. He groaned in protest, but she shut him up with a hot kiss, smacking lips and teeth clashing for a minute until she felt him rubbing against her leg, dripping precum over her.

She left him with a peck, moving back down his body and once more, she grabbed his cock. This time not waiting before licking a bold strip from the base to the tip, sucking harshly on the head of his cock before letting it go with a pop when he whimpered loudly, “Tell me how bad you want it.”

He looked down at her and couldn’t do more than just curse under his breath, “Fuck, Ella.” He could bust right then and there just from the view.

Her breathy chuckle hit the tip of his cock and he whined, “That’s the spirit but not what I asked.”

Alex ached and he knew he had to listen to her if he wanted to get anything, “I want you so bad darling, your mouth–”

But Ella was enjoying this way too much so she teased him some more, her words coming out in a sing-song tone, “You’re missing the magic word.”

He rolled his eyes and threw his head back on the pillows, “Please darling, I want to fuck your mouth.”

A snort of laughter came from her, Alex groaned at the sound because he was on the verge of tears and begging for her to do something, anything. “Chivalry is truly not dead after all, huh?” She joked with a stupid smile on her face.

The singer would’ve laughed in any other situation but he was about to lose it, he couldn’t even use his hands because he was fisting the duvet so hard his fingers ached. “Stop teasing, Ella, please.”

She dared him then, “Oh, but I thought you liked teasing?” There was a clear memory of him stating that, and how it’d opened a can of worms that always came to the forefront of her mind when she touched herself to the thought of him.

She smirked again and taunted him by leaving a soft peck on the tip of his cock, making Alex cry out a pained, “Fuck me–”

Still teasing, Ella hummed and played with the meaning of his words in a nonchalant manner, “Maybe in a bit, if you’re good and listen to what I say.”

Despaired now, he didn’t mind begging at all, “I will, I will. I promise baby. Just– Please Ella, I need you. Need you so fucking bad.” The vein on the side of his neck protruded as he spoke in a haste.

Ella was more than satisfied with that and she breathily let him know what had been her plan all along, “Just like that, Alex. I want you desperate.”

And with that she took him in her mouth, inhaling deeply through her nose to take him as deep as she could. When he hit the back of her throat, Alex subconsciously thrusted into her mouth, moaning louder than he had anticipated, making her gag but moan back in response when she drew back enough to take a deep breath.

With her taking him to the back of her throat every time, hollowing her cheeks and bobbing her head up and down relentlessly, he started twitching in her mouth and squirming beneath her in a minute. Ella knew he was close and she would’ve loved to have him paint her throat with his cum but this time she wanted him inside her, to spill in her cunt and drip out of her like she’d fantasized about so many times before, so just as he started gasping and his hips started stuttering, she pulled back and left him hanging over the edge of climax.

“Ella–” He choked out as he felt the coil of pleasure that had been tensing and building up as he’d been buried deep in her mouth completely left him and all that was left was the uncomfortable feeling of a stolen orgasm.

“Wait, sweetness.” She said in an infuriatingly sweet tone, cupping his jaw as she stood beside the edge of the bed and kissing him softly before standing back up and saying, “I want to do something. Stay there.”

She turned on her heels and made her way to his walk-in closet, knowing she would be able to find something there if she were to look for it. But she'd only taken three steps into the room when she heard the movement back in his room. He had painfully sat himself on bed, back against the cold metal rods that formed his headboard, and he’d been debating whether or not to get himself off to relieve himself of the ache that washed over him when her voice hit him like a ton of bricks, a heavy demanding tone behind her words, “If you don’t listen to what I say, you’re not getting a single thing, Turner.”

Alex froze in his spot, his cock twitching at the dominating roll she was taking. He threw his head back and swallowed a groan. He hadn’t even cum and she’d already ruined him, there would never be another one but her.

He waited patiently, a minute passed and all he could hear were the drawers being opened and closed until he saw her come back into the bedroom with one of his ties on her right hand.

She smirked seeing him sitting in bed waiting for her. She cooed like it actually amazed her that he listened and got on the bed again, placing her knees on each side of his hips to straddle him. Her hand came up to cup his jaw and her thumb brushed soft circles on his skin before she praised him with a proud, “Good boy.”

She distracted him with a dizzying kiss, one that he indulged in with feverish eagerness until she pulled back and their lips separated with a smack, the sound was followed by her words which sounded more of a statement than a question, “I’m gonna tie you up, yeah?” He nodded quickly, his brain a mush and unable to even think about what it was that she wanted to do to him tied up to his headboard but he was willing to comply if it meant that she’d make him cum.

He didn’t even have time to complain or ask questions because her tits had been on his face while she tied his wrists avidly to the posts of the headboard and he’d been too busy biting and sucking on them.

She moaned when he caught one of her nipples in his mouth and sucked it. Despite the very nice distraction, she pulled on the knots she so expertly knew how to tie and grinned in satisfaction when seeing them hold his wrists perfectly for her.

Ella sat on his lap, feeling his cock still hard coming to touch her drenched cunt and brought her hand to his face when he hissed at the contact. “I know.” She said softly before kissing him softly and briefly. “Is this alright?” She needed to ask again, to make sure it wasn’t too much since she could see the way his eyes were glazed over with frustrated tears from the edging.

But Alex nodded with a loopy smile that she loved and all she could do was smirk, nothing but a mischievous look in her eyes.

A look that’d get a meaning when she spoke up again, “If you’re cumming anywhere today, it’s gonna be inside me, okay?”

Alex nodded despite the shock her words had given him, his mouth agape in surprise at her bluntness.

Her hand slowly crawled down his chest until she could wrap her fingers around his length, she watched with a parted mouth as he threw his head back at the contact and he muttered under his breath, “Fuck me…”

A bright grin broke on her face and she leaned in to lick his bottom lip before saying, “That’s exactly what I’m gonna do.”

Alex was left with his mouth parted in search of a kiss but oxygen left his lungs when she pulled back slightly to spit on his cock, her hand starting to pump him a handful of times before she lined him up with her sopping entrance. She knew it would be easy to sink into him with how wet she was and the mess she’d made of Alex.

Just to build on the last bits of anticipation, she brushed his cock up and down her cunt, shivering when he grazed her clit.

“Darling…” Alex breathed out in pain, hidden away in the crook of her neck as she teased his tip in her hole.

She hummed, acknowledging him and finally letting herself sink down on him. He tried his best to keep his eyes on her as her mouth went slack and a soft whimper left her at the stretch of his cock, but his gaze fell down to see where they connected and his eyes rolled back into his skull. He could just cum seeing himself buried balls deep inside her, snugging him so tightly and clenching around him as she slightly squirmed over him when adjusting her balance on her knees.

She cried out in pleasure right as she started moving, rolling her hips tentatively to set a starting pace. But she could barely get a hold of her own thoughts, all that went through her mind was how she could feel every ridge and vein, how he was making her brain melt inside her skull with the way he felt inside her, “Filling me up so good.”

Alex swore he was seeing stars with how she was squeezing him, how good she looked as her hips rolled with an increasing speed that would surely drive him to the edge in no time, “Fuck, you’re so tight–”

With every roll of her hips, her clit pressed against his pubic bone and offered her a delicious pressure that made her eyes roll back. Her gasps and moans got louder as she went faster and the melodies of their pleasured sounds turned into a pornographic harmony when Ella went from rolling her hips to bouncing on his cock.

Her tits bounced as she picked up the pace, her hands resting on his chest for leverage and her hair falling in front of her face as she leaned in and changed the angle slightly. Alex stared at Ella fucking herself on his cock and it was a scene that not even his dreams could amount to. Watching himself disappear inside her over and over, and feeling her slick dripping down his cock and making a mess of the bedsheets had him looking up at the ceiling for a few seconds, willing himself not to cum too fast, to last as long as he could so they could cum together.

“Is this how you imagined?” She teased.

“Better,” Alex swore, too gone to be anything but sincere. “You’re perfect. You’re– I couldn’t have made you up. I couldn’t have ever imagined– God, you’re everything I need, Ella.”

The sound of the skin slapping every time they met was loud so the shit she muttered under her breath was barely audible. Ella slowed down just a bit to stabilize herself with just her left hand on his chest, bringing her right hand up to his neck and wrapping her fingers deftly around it, “I’ve always wanted to do this with you.”

Her fingers pressed on the sides of his neck, choking him just the perfect way. Her ‘Pure Desire’ tattoo adorning his throat. It was a miracle how he didn’t cum from just her doing that, that lustful look on her face as she watched him gasp and choke on a whimper as her fingertips dug on the sides of his neck. It just made Alex want to fuck her harder, and it seemed like it had the same effect on her because she picked up her pace despite the burning of her thighs from the effort.

Alex met her in the middle with every bounce, thrusting his hips up into her and hitting the perfect spot for her. “Right there, right there! Alex!” She was growing breathless, barely able to pick her head up. She was starting to regret tying him up just a little, she wanted him to hold her and help her match his eager thrusts as she got closer to her orgasm.

Digging his heels on the mattress, Alex found the footing to quicken the pace, “Ella– fuck!” He groaned and moaned loudly, his mind reeling when his hearing was entirely overcome by the sounds of the skin slapping and Ella’s mewls and whines.

Ella gasped with every thrust, the coil in her lower stomach tightening impossibly each time he hit that sweet spot inside her and her grip on his neck got tighter as she clenched hard around him. Her legs started trembling more and more and then her orgasm hit her suddenly, blacking out her sight as she shook and spasmed on him, loud cries of his name accompanied the symphony.

Seeing Ella as she came again, hearing how she cried out his name and the way she squeezed his cock with her cunt, Alex came hard inside her. His thrusts became sloppy as he shivered and his cock twitched as he spilled and painted her walls with his cum. His hips stuttered as her tightness milked his cock relentlessly, but he still rocked his hips into her, meeting her slow messy pace as they both came down from their highs.

With her legs trembling, Ella just dropped against his chest, completely fucked off reality for a few minutes. All they could hear was each other’s breathing and their hearts beating in sync as their chests pressed against each other.

She wondered why Alex was keeping his touch away from her when she remembered she’d tied him up so she lifted her head up and brushed her hair back to reach out and undo his restraints with one pull of the end of the tie.

Alex groaned at the feeling of his arms plopping down beside his head, but he ignored the soreness of his limbs when he could finally brush her hair back from where it stuck to her sweaty face and cup her jaw to give her a sweet kiss he’d been craving to give her the whole time she was riding him.

Ella smiled into the kiss when she remembered all that had happened in a matter of a few minutes. She’d lost track of time entirely, not even able to point out how long it could’ve been since she’d showed up at his house to just tell him all that she’d been holding back.

The happiness that bubbled inside her filled her with warmth and a small burst of energy enough to have her peel herself off him to rest beside him in bed. She lifted herself off him and settled to his right with a soft whine at the loss of him. Alex turned to his side and cupped her face once more to give her a quick kiss before he pushed himself up and off the bed with a quick, “I’ll be right back darling.”

He got up and went to his ensuite to clean himself up, flashbacks of what had happened made his cock twitch again. He got a cloth and wet it with warm water, taking it with him to clean Ella up.

Her eyes lazily followed him as he came back into his room and up to her. His hands softly spread her legs out to clean up the mess in between her legs. His cum dripping out of her mixed with her own had Alex biting his bottom lip, a shaky breath out his nose before he cursed out loud, “Fuck me.” She whimpered at the touch of the cloth against her overstimulated center, and he kissed her softly as an apology, being careful to continue cleaning her up until she was rid of it all. He had made a mental note to stuff his cum back in her next time, see it dripping out of her over and over, fuck the cum inside her with his fingers or his cock.

Alex left to go back to the bathroom with that in mind, his blood rushing south again the more he imagined it all. When he went back to bed, he noticed Ella had thrown the ruined duvet on the floor and gotten under the sheets. And when he turned to see her, she made grabby hands at him. He chuckled at the contrast of her behavior throughout the night, but was quick to cuddle her into him.

They snuggled beneath the sheets, their legs tangling together as his arm snaked under her to wrap around her waist and holding her flush against him so she could rest her head on his chest. Throwing her arm across his middle to keep him close, Ella nuzzled her head into his chest and she melted against him.

With Alex rubbing circles on her waist, Ella was starting to fall asleep. It was still light outside, the sun still heating up the ground outside and the bright rays managing their way into the room through the thin curtains that covered the windows, but her eyes grew heavy and her breathing evened out as time passed.

That was until Alex sighed loudly out of the blue and cursed, “Well, fucking hell.”

Ella frowned, confused by his sudden choice of words, “What?”

But Alex had been replaying everything in his mind and he felt himself growing flustered and hotter the more he recalled, “You’re seriously asking what after that?”

She couldn’t help but blush, because how the fuck had she gone from crying and going on and on about how tired she was of silently wanting him yet losing him every time to riding his face, edging him twice to then tie him up and fuck the lights out of him.

So she hid her face behind her hands, not wanting Alex to see her face, which she knew had to be bright red.

“Oh don’t go all shy on me now, darling.” He played with her, a chuckle slipping past his lips. His fingers peeling her hands off her face, only to be followed by littering every bit of her face with kisses until she was giggling and cuddled back into him.

They laid there in silence, dropping sweet kisses and tracing patterns on each other’s skin. It was one of those comfortable silences that they’d developed ever since they grew back together during the recording of AM.

A silence that was shattered by Alex thinking out loud, “Now I know what it feels like…”

She snorted when hearing him trail off like that, because what would that even mean? He wasn’t a virgin. “Huh?” She frowned as she looked up at him, trying to hide her amusement by pursing her lips.

“To be that bull.” Alex simply stated, looking down at her with a growing smirk on his face.

She was even more confused then, “Bull? What bull?”

“The one from that pub when you broke the record.” He explained with an obvious tone in his voice.

Ella burst out laughing at the realization of what he was implying. As if her riding that mechanical bull for three minutes was anything near what they’d done just then. She shoved him by his shoulder, letting herself fall away from his hold still laughing, “Fucks sake Alex, you’re an idiot.”

He hooked his arms around her waist again and pulled her into him again, “What? Thought you were a proud cowgirl?”

But she shook her head in disbelief and hid in the crook of his neck, mumbling a halfhearted “Stop.” on his bruised skin.

“Nothing not to be proud of with how well you ride, darling.” The singer added, to which she pinched his side, making him jump and yelp aloud.

With a frown to conceal her amusement, Ella came out of her hiding place, narrowed eyes to help her threat resonate in his head, “I’m gagging you next time.”

Alex shook his head as he watched a smirk slowly breaking on her face, “You’d like that wouldn’t you?”

Her gaze dropped to his lips, picturing them all wet and swollen, wrapped around a gag, leather belt wrapped around the back of his head and tight on the skin of his face. That was a view she certainly would appreciate, “I’d love it.”

Love. Alex smiled at the word, remembering he finally could tell her, “I love you.” and have her know exactly what he meant.

Ella’s heart was almost bursting at its seams when he said that, saying “I love you.” back to him was the easiest thing she could ever do.

Staring at each other adoringly, a minute or two passed. He twirled a strand of her hair slowly with his fingers, counting each freckle on her skin and taking in every bit of her in this new setting.

“How long have you been holding that back?” He asked curiously, wanting to know how long she’d been agonizingly waiting to let all those words out. His chest hurt when remembering her mentioning the pictures paparazzis had taken of him and Alexa and how she’d implied him going for Alexa just like he’d gone for Arielle two years before.

Ella genuinely asked back, “Wanting to fuck you?”

“No, you dickhead.” Alex replied with a cackle, his giggles falling right behind his words, making her giggle along until he could clarify, “Wanting to tell me you love me.”

“I was in denial for a while.” Ella admitted easily. There was no reason to not be entirely transparent with him anymore and she hoped he felt the same way as she continued, “But as soon as I saw you leave that morning… I was just entirely sure about it the second I woke up.”

He frowned, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

She scoffed softly when just considering how that would’ve happened, “Tell you that over the phone? No chance.” She was so glad it hadn’t been that way, because having him close after having told him everything felt so right and she knew she would’ve cried when he reciprocated and she couldn’t have him beside her right then and there.

Alex hummed, knowing what she meant, “I reckon if you’d told me when I was away, I would’ve cried not being able to kiss you right then and there.”

“Exactly.” Ella said, slightly wide eyes at the way it just felt like he’d read her mind. But before she could forget, she asked him, “Why didn’t you say anything?”

With an embarrassed smile on his face, Alex shyly replied, “I was afraid you wouldn’t feel the same.”

She sighed, smiling at their own foolishness. Both of them were concerned about the same thing and instead of speaking about it, they kept it to themselves in fear of rejection as if their actions didn’t speak louder than their hushed words. “We’re such idiots.”

“We are.” Alex agreed with a grin on his face, leaning in until their noses brushed and giving her a eskimo kiss before slotting his lips between hers.

Her fingers delicately held his jaw as they kissed slowly, all that hunger had simmered down and turned into tenderness, wanting to feel each other as close as they could like becoming one was possible. There was no rush, the only priority was taking in every second their lips moved together, tasting each other’s tongues with patience and trying to translate their love into it.

“How long has it been for you?” Ella asked softly when she pulled away after a minute of slowly kissing, her thumb rubbing circles on his jaw.

Alex smirked when he knew what he could say about the very second he realized how he felt for Ella, “You wanna know who was there when I realized it all?”

Her curiosity was piqued by the weird approach of his answer, “Who?”

The last thing Ella was waiting for him to say was, “Alexa.”

A quick, “No.” in disbelief left her lips, Ella’s cheeks heating up at the fact that she’d been horrendously affected by her presence beside Alex on a picture when Alexa had been there the time Alex came to the conclusion that he was in love with her.

“Yes.” Alex continued smirking as he said, eager to see her reaction when he’d tell her just how it had happened. “Remember how we were on the phone at the wedding and she came by for a smoke?” Ella nodded, remembering that exact moment way too well for her liking, “You hung up and she just asked who you were. And once she asked, I couldn’t stop talking about you. She just listened and kept teasing me about it. I was gonna leave but then she asked why I hadn’t made a move, said something like ‘you really like her, don’t you?’ and it dawned on me; how I just couldn’t say I liked you because it wasn’t enough.”

Ella looked at him with teasing wide eyes and played, “‘Cause you love me.”

He hummed with a foolish grin tugging at the corners of his mouth, “Because I love you.”

Alex couldn’t help catching her mouth in a kiss again. Now that he could freely kiss her any time he wanted, there was no moment he wouldn’t be thinking of tasting her mouth and feeling her lips on his. She was all he needed to get drunk from.

He caught her bottom lip with his teeth before he could pull back from the kiss, tugging on her lip until she hummed in satisfaction at his action. Her pupils enlarged when he let go of her lip and looked at her in the eyes. She took it as the perfect opportunity to answer the question she thought he’d meant to ask at the start, “If I’m being honest, I’ve always wanted to fuck you.”

His mouth opened agape in slight shock, “Oi, you filthy bitch.” He called her out for the bluntness he would have to get used to without becoming speechless, but she’d caught him off guard and he couldn’t help but chuckle.

“What?!” She frowned and scoffed before calling him out, “Don’t even start, Turner. Not when I know that you were getting yourself off to my pictures.”

He played dumb very obviously, the inflection of his voice going up as he asked, “Who? Me?”

“Yeah, you. Pervert.” Ella narrowed her eyes as she joked, calling him out further by adding, “And whilst you had a girlfriend too!”

At the mention of that, Alex dropped his joking expression and sighed in regret as he got serious, “Don’t. I actually feel really bad about that. I had to break up with her because I couldn’t stop thinking of you.”

She’d always been curious as to why he’d broken up with Arielle all of the sudden so she gasped and looked for more answers, “Are you serious?”

He hummed, wincing as he recalled, “I called her your name one time and I just couldn’t continue in that relationship after that.”

Ella gasped horrified, “You didn’t Cornerstone poor Arielle to me!” She couldn’t believe him, barely being able to scold him with the way her jaw was on the floor in shock, “Alexander David Turner!”

“I’m sorry.” He apologized wholeheartedly.

Her eyes looked into his unwavering for a minute and when she remembered a certain piece of information she’d gotten all those months before, she slapped her hand over her mouth and a muffled, “Oh my god. No. No. No. No.” came from her.

Alex frowned in confusion, his eyes swimming all over her face searching for answers but she just kept her mouth agape in further shock behind her hand, “What?!”

“Are you fucking kidding me, Alex?!” Her hand went from covering her mouth to cover her eyes as she sighed, entirely appalled by it all.

“What?!” The singer asked again, he’d no idea why the look on her face and he was starting to worry.

She had to take a few seconds to gather her thoughts before letting him know, “She fucking called me, you know? After you broke up with her, saying how you’d had the best sex the night before you broke up with her. And he said you called her darling for the first time that night!”

Alex hissed when he heard that and he knew he’d just have to admit to his mistakes, “I did call her darling ‘cause I was picturing you but she didn’t hear me calling her Ellie when I came.”

Another gasp came from Ella, “Alex! For fucks sake!”

“I know, I felt horrible.” Alex admitted, regret written all over his face, “I really did. If it counts for anything.”

Ella shook her head in disbelief, “Alex, I took her out to the club to make her feel better when it was because of me all along?!”

But Alex wouldn’t let her take that blow when it had all been his actions that caused Arielle hurt, “It wasn’t your fault, love. That was all me.”

“Alexxxxxx.” Ella whined as she covered her face with her hands again but this time because she had no idea what to say anymore. She was starting to feel bad for that having happened to Arielle due to her own existence and of course, Alex’s lack of self control. But she felt even worse for the fact that her stomach flipped and she filled up with a strange feeling when knowing she’d made Alex a total and complete mess since that long ago.

“Stop it.” Alex chuckled and pulled her in closer to him but she shuffled away from him the more he pulled on her wrists, “Come here.”

She shook her head, still hidden behind her hands, “No. I’m angry at you.”

“Our first argument already?” Alex joked and Ella rolled her eyes because she could hear the smirk on his face just from the tone of his voice.

“Slight disagreement.” Ella corrected, making Alex cackle loudly.

“Right.” He snickered before pulling on her wrists again, “Don’t hide please.” If she wasn’t gonna let herself be pulled towards him, then he’d go to her. So he crawled over to where she was and hovered on top of her, leaning in to leave a kiss on top of her hands and whisper, “I love you.”

She huffed, dropping her hands from her face to show her frown and cross her arms over her chest, “No, don’t bribe me like that.”

But how could he not? He just couldn’t hold himself back from saying, “I love you.” followed by a kiss on the right side of her face. Another “Love you.” with a kiss to the left side of her face. And one last “Love you so much.” before catching her lips in an elongated peck.

Despite the fact that she’d gracefully accepted the peck, when Alex pulled back, Ella still kept a blank expression on her face and said a meek, “Sure.”

He frowned, “Darling.”

“Alex.” Ella said back with the same determined tone he’d used.

He huffed childishly, “No.”

She chatted back with a short and dry, “Yes.” A roll of her eyes added in to accentuate her annoyance at it all.

But all that did to Alex was make him bite his lip because she looked so fucking hot when she was like this. He didn’t even know if he ever wanted to see her angry, but if she looked hotter than this, then he wouldn’t be opposed to being the target or her wrath.

“God, I fucking love you.” Alex groaned before cupping her face with his hands and pouncing on her lips.

His tongue licked at her bottom lip instantly and despite the fact that she was trying to continue acting all annoyed, she parted her mouth and invited him to lick into her mouth with a sigh of bliss.

Just to make her facade of annoyance crumble, Alex started moaning and groaning into the kiss, making a show of becoming sloppier with it and then leaving her mouth to attack her neck with wet open mouthed kisses so quick that the brush of his lips tickled her and had her giggling.

He pulled away when he heard her laughter, a loopy grin on his face matching the one on hers. But one that fell when she caught his gaze and said, “Now you gotta answer.”

“Huh?” He let out when he couldn’t put a finger on what she meant.

She smirked, her hands slowly brushing up his chest until they were resting on his shoulders and her legs wrapping around his hips before she asked, “How long have you been wanting to fuck me?”

Feeling her the heels of her feet digging into his ass, he let himself fall over her, his cock hardening just at the faintest touch of her cunt. “Ages.” He replied, gasping when she rolled her hips and he felt the arousal already wetting her core.

“Is that right?” She teased, fingers playing with the hair at the nape of his neck.

He hummed, a rush of heat flooding his body and blood rushing down to his cock just by the hungry look that had taken over her face. Her green eyes became black as her pupils dilated with another roll of her hips. “And I’ll make up for lost time until the day I die.” He swore out loud, because he would and it would not be a hardship in the slightest.

She grinned proudly at his words, butterflies fluttering in her belly at the hint of him willing to give her all those years of his life, willing to share all that time with her, “Good boy.”

His cock twitched at the praise. She’d fucking ruined him for good. “Call me that again.”

Ella smirked at his request but had no problem with repeating herself. “My.” She started saying, accentuating each word with a kiss, “Good.” Kiss. “Fucking.” Kiss. “Boy.”

Smashing their lips together, a bruising kiss followed as their hips started rolling in sync. Alex was already growing hard against her, his erection pressing onto her mound and she was getting more and more turned on from the way he reacted to her and the desperation seeping through his pores.

Alex could feel her already drenched and he couldn’t help but bring his hand down to gather some of her arousal. Two of his fingers ran up her folds and he hissed into her mouth. When he looked down, he let his fingers sink into her hole and her wetness allowed for them to glide in easily. The singer cursed under his breath when he drew his fingers back and when he looked back up at her, she let her mouth hang open inviting him to push his fingers into her mouth, wanting a taste.

He pushed his digits past her lips and let them heavily weigh down on the tip of her tongue. She moaned and her eyes rolled back at her taste, swirling her tongue around them before fully sinking them onto her mouth and humming in satisfaction when tasting even more of her wetness.

His mouth fell agape as he took in the filthiness of the scene, “How did I get so lucky?”

Letting go of his fingers with a pop, Ella replied to his question with a passionate kiss. So messy and pointless for their teeth clashed and couldn’t stop gasping the more their hips rolled into each other’s. But Alex could taste her arousal on her tongue and it drove him mad. He wanted another taste, he needed it.

So he broke the kiss, a string of spit clinging between their wet lips, guiding his kisses down her jaw and neck, her chest and abdomen until he reached her mound. Ella shuddered feeling his hot breath growing closer and closer to her heat, a wave of pleasure making her hips rut on the bed.

Her cunt was glistening, inviting him to have a fucking feast. And that he did once he threw her legs over his shoulders and he laid flat on the bed. His tongue pressed flat against her cunt and started to lap eagerly up and down her folds. Her right hand flew to catch a hold of his hair while the other one came up to her chest, fingers kneading her own tits, pinching her nipples when he started flicking at her clit.

“F–fuck!” Ella cursed loudly when he sucked on her clit, her hips bucking quicker with every second that went by, her fingers abusing her pebbled nipples even more to intensify the pleasure his mouth was bringing her. “Alex, baby… Shit.”

He hummed with his lips wrapped around her clit, her back arching from the vibration reverberation all over her. Her toes curling and her mouth going slack when he pointed his tongue and started fucking her with it, moving his head in such a way that his nose was rubbing on her clit.

She fucking loved it. She hadn’t known how badly she’d wanted to feel that again until she did and now all she could think of was getting this every day for the rest of her life. “Mmmm, just like that.” She praised, her hips still meeting his movements and making her orgasm build up.

Alex looked up at her and the sight of her playing with her tits as he tongue fucked had him letting out a guttural groan and bucking his hips into the mattress. The friction that brought him made him whimper pathetically and once the whiny sound fell on Ella’s ears, she got louder.

He got more vocal then, humming and moaning as he lapped at her, flicked and sucked at her clit, pointed his tongue to tease her sopping hole; all of it over and over until her legs started shaking beside his head.

“Alex! Al– Fuck.” She messily let out in between gasps, “M’so close. Oh fuckkkkk.” She mewled when his tongue started flicking faster at her clit, her eyes screwed shut and her hand falling from her chest to claw at the sheets when she felt her orgasm approaching her rapidly.

With a yell of his name, she came on his tongue, coating it with the sweetness he was already addicted to. The wetness mixed with his spit dribbling down his chin as he tried his best to lap at every drop, not wanting to let any of it go to waste.

His hips started rutting faster against the mattress, the springs of his bed creaking as he went. The sound of it was the thing Ella first heard when she came down from her high, not knowing what it was until she looked down and saw Alex lapping at the arousal that had wet her inner thighs and his hips bucking relentlessly on the bed.

“I can’t get enough of the taste of you, darling,” he confessed, kissing her inner thigh. “I’m obsessed.”

Pulling on his hair, Ella peeled him away from her cunt and in between her panting as she tried catching her breath, she finally said, “Fuck me, Alex. I need you.” Even if she was spent, and she felt far too oversensitive, she couldn’t miss the chance of him filling her up again.

He couldn’t wait anymore so there was not a second to doubt nodding and giving into her wishes, he crawled up her body and pumped himself quickly before aligning his cock to her entrance. Pushing his hips forward slowly and sinking into her for the second time in the night, Alex swore that was exactly how heaven felt like. Her back arched off the mattress when he bottomed out, her legs wouldn’t stop shaking and she felt her eyes well up with tears at the stretch after having just cum.

A cry of his name blessed Alex’s ears at the same time he leaned in to groan onto her chest. “Fuck me, you feel so fucking perfect.” He praised as he tried to catch his breath, stilling inside her to give her time to adjust to his length again. She needed to relax again because if her cunt kept squeezing him like that, he wouldn’t last more than a minute.

Before he could start moving, he lifted her legs up slowly one by one until they were thrown over his shoulders, shuffling closer until the backs of her thighs were flush against his chest and he leaned into her, her knees coming closer to her chest and the new angle allowing for him to sink even deeper inside her.

“Oh my– Fuck!” She yelled at the stretch of this new angle that had him pressing into her g-spot perfectly. She shivered beneath him, hips struggling to stay in place when her body was screaming for him to start moving. She felt like she was about to explode. “Alex, Alex, move please.”

Alex started at a fairly quick pace, not being able to start slow because the angle in which he fucked her just made her squeeze his cock even tighter. Not that Ella wanted him slower, she could feel her second orgasm looming on her with force and she needed him to continue picking up his pace.

The claps of their skin filled up the room, along with her high pitched whimpers and his groans. Her head was thrown back, giving him full access to kiss and bite and suck the skin of her neck and when he did, it just made her pleasure increase tenfold.

“Al– harder. Please, harder.” Ella cried out, feeling herself about to fall over the edge, seeing stars behind her eyelids with every thrust.

“Aren’t you greedy?” Alex taunted but obliged, and with harder thrusts, it truly felt like he was fucking her into the matress, the springs creaking as it bounced from their movement.

“Yes! Don’t stop!” She yelled desperately, her orgasm building more intensely every time his pubic bone smacked against her clit, the pain turning into blinding pleasure that made her toes curl and her fingers pull harder on his hair.

Alex rested all of his weight on his left hand then, using his right hand to start rubbing her clit in quick motions to have her cum along with him because there was only so much longer he could hold and he was afraid he was getting closer and closer to his limit. “Are you gonna cum for me?”

She bit her lip, rolling her eyes. “If you keep– Just–”

“Gonna drench my cock, huh?” He nosed her neck, tickling her. “Gonna make a mess of it?”

“Yes!” And, true to her words, Ella came all over him, the stimulation from him hitting her g-spot and toying with her clit making her squirt all over him, drenching him and the sheets. And with that filthy sight Alex came right after her, his cum coating her walls as he continued pounding into her with messy thrusts.

“Fucking hell, you’re hot.”

The rhythm of his hips faltered as he continued riding out both of their climaxes, his finger slowing down on her clit until it stopped as she kept spasming around him. Her legs were shaking on his shoulders, so he let her let them down slowly after dropping a kiss on her calves and resting them on the bed.

Alex rubbed her thighs softly as he pulled out from her, hissing when he did just like Ella whined at the emptiness, wanting nothing but for him to be always inside her, he filled her up so good she thought she would soon become addicted to it.

He looked down at the mess on the sheets, his brain flashing the image of her squirting all over him as he watched his cum dripping out of her and staining the wet sheets. Alex groaned from the pits of his chest, hovering down over her again and mumbling against her lips, “I fucking adore you.”

She giggled, trying to see his face through half lidded eyes and hummed, “Adore you too.”

At the sight of her eyes closing, Alex got off the bed and swiftly carried her to the bathroom so they could get cleaned up. When he set her on the floor of his en-suite, she groaned loudly at the soreness of her legs and her cunt, Alex laughed in response.

Ella glared at him then, folding her arms as she watched him get towels from some shelves hidden in the corner of the room. “Don’t laugh, you’ve just folded me like a pretzel. I’m gonna be so sore.”

The comparison only made him laugh even harder and she pouted. “‘M sorry, but you enjoyed it.” He walked up to her and, after tossing the towels on a bench beside the glass doors that encased his shower, he enveloped her in a hug and dropped a sweet kiss on her lips.

He started walking towards the shower as they kissed, so she walked backwards until the cold glass made her hiss when it touched the warm skin of her back. He pulled back from the kiss and dropped two pecks on her before opening the glass door for them to get inside but when she turned, she managed to catch a glimpse of herself in the mirror.

Ella scoffed, “Gonna have the best time covering these up, thanks Alex.” Her neck was covered in lovebites and so was her chest, and when she let her gaze fall down to her thighs, she found the darkening bruises littered inside of them.

He looked at her through the mirror coming to press himself against her back, his arms wrapping around her middle and dipping to leave a trail of kisses up her neck until he reached her ear and whispered, “Didn’t hear you complaining when I left them.”

She rolled her eyes at him trying to act like his tricks weren’t working but her walls clenched around nothing in response. “Shut up.” She said before peeling his arms off her and walking into the shower first. He was gonna be the death of her.

Alex walked in after her and pulled her into him again by wrapping an arm around her waist, their chests pressed flush against each other this time and making her throw her arms around his neck. “You love me.” The singer mumbled against her lips in a reminder, the smirk that broke on his face only pushing Ella to tease him back.

“Do I?” She quipped back, cocking her head to the side and putting on a pretty convincing confused expression on her face.

His eyes turned mischievous as he said, “You do.” and then flicked the shower on making her gasp when the cold water fell over them as they stood right beneath the wide shower head.

“You’re such a little shit.” She hissed through her teeth before pushing him off her softly. She really didn’t want him away because the water still fell on them cold but she had to commit to the bit.

The singer giggled as he stumbled backwards but came back up to her seconds later, wrapping an arm around her waist again and cupping her jaw, tilting her head slightly so he could kiss her. It stupidly felt like kissing under the rain and suddenly Ella couldn’t be more excited for every first kiss they’d share in the future.

“You still love me though.” Alex chatted back when he broke the kiss.

And despite the roll of her eyes, a smile won over her pursed lips and she agreed, “I do love you.”

Alex hummed, “And I love you.”

Soon enough the spray of water grew warmer and they started to clean themselves up. Alex grabbed the new bottle of shampoo he’d gotten and started washing Ella’s hair, massaging her head softly and making her moan as his fingers dug perfectly into scalp. When he rinsed the shampoo fully off her hair, she took over the task of washing his and he also was a moaning mess as she took her time massaging his head. They soaped each other up delicately and slightly teasingly, hissing when they would poke at a particular tender spot the other had sucked on their skin, smirking when they’d taunt each other with a frisky touch like when Alex groped her tits with the excuse of properly cleaning her up and when she let her fingers inch closer and closer to his cock as she soaped up his lower stomach.

When they came out of the shower, after Ella had made him fuck her first when he got hard at her tantalising touch, Alex wrapped her in a towel and left her to dry her hair with another one while he wrapped his own towel around his waist and went back out into his room to get some clothes for them to wear.

A few minutes later, Alex walked back into the bathroom in just a pair of joggers and one of his shirts and a pair of boxers in hand for her. He gave Ella the clothes and left her to take her time as he went back to his bedroom and picked up the duvet and the bedsheets to take to the wash.

It didn’t take him long to put the bedding in the washing machine and when he came back he melted at the sight of her wearing his shirt and boxers and brushing her wet hair with her fingers.

He stepped into the room, walking back to the shelves in the corner to take out a comb and a hair dryer. “C’mere, I’ll do it for you.” He waved her over to the marble counter where two sinks stood beside each other, and he tapped on the space in the middle for her to sit on while he took care of her hair

She walked over to him and sat where he told her, the marble cold against her bare thighs making goosebumps break along the skin of the legs. He stood between her legs, brushing from the ends of her hair upwards, making her get down to properly brush the back of her head. He then plugged the hair dryer and started drying her hair, his fingers tenderly combing through her hair as the warm air dried it.

When he was done, Alex was quick to give her a peck so that she would open her eyes which had fluttered closed at the feeling of his fingers raking through her hair.

“Thank you, darling.” Ella said with a fake British accent, trying her best to mock him but clearly failing when he frowned at her advances.

“You’re welcome, babe.” Alex replied, retaliating by putting on a fake American accent so high pitched it made Ella wince.

She scoffed, swatting at his chest softly, “I don’t sound like that at all!”

The singer just shrugged, wanting to wind her up, “Are you sure?”

“Dickhead.” She bit back with her eyes narrowed, making him let out a loud laugh before he pulled her into a tight embrace that ended with them sharing a sweet kiss.

With one last peck on her cheek after he separated their lips with a smack, Alex went and unplugged the hair dryer and put it back in its place along with the comb. Walking back to where Ella still stood, leaning on the marble of the sinks, and interlocked their fingers to walk back into the room.

Seeing the bed bare of bedding made Ella’s cheeks heat up, knowing that it was all her doing that the sheets were fully ruined to use tonight. Alex looked at her and smiled at her bright red face, pecking her lips before reminding her that it had been the hottest thing that he’d ever seen and suggesting taking the bedding from one of the guest rooms to get her out of her head.

Walking over to the guest room, Ella chuckled out loud remembering how he’d promised her a house tour and she was only getting it after she’d ruined his sheets, not because he’d promised.

“You still owe me that house tour, you know?” She taunted him with a grin on her face.

He turned to the side to look at her and giggled when realizing what was going through her head, “Tomorrow after breakfast, I promise.” She hummed, knowing she’d hold him up to that.

But at the mention of food, she openly admitted she was hungry and he said he was too. So they went back to his kitchen, hand in hand, and made themselves a fast sandwich that they practically devoured in minutes, along with a few talls glasses of water when they realized just how parched their activities had left them. They quickly put everything away in the dishwasher and continued their quest for the bedding.

When they opened the door to the guest room, Ella marveled at the look of it. It was California rustic and so pretty, the wallpaper and the wood used around the room combined beautifully and she realized then she hadn’t even had the chance to appreciate Alex’s room. Too caught up in trying to finally have him all to herself in the many ways she’d dreamed about.

She made a point to take in every detail of his room when they came back to it with their arms full of white bedding. Compliments came from her about what she’d seen of the house so far as they struggled to put on the fitted sheet, they laughed when they messed up the way it went and when the corners wouldn’t stay on as they perfectly placed them at first. The scene was so domestic, her heart grew in sizes inside her chest. How could she be feeling this rumble of butterflies in her stomach from just making a bed with him? She was utterly and completely fucked, and instead of scaring her anymore, it just felt right and she reveled in it.

Once they managed to tackle the fitted sheet, everything else came easier and as soon as the duvet was perfectly placed, Alex ran up to the window to pull down the blackout curtains and once that was done, the two of them gracefully disheveled the tidy way they’d made the bed to get under the sheets and finally cuddle each other until they could rest.

This time it was Alex who lay on top of her, the side of his face pressed over her chest where he was starting to fall asleep, being lulled by the steady beating of her heart and her nails scratching lightly at his scalp.

They’d been lying in silence for about ten minutes when Ella whispered, “Love?”

Alex smiled brightly with his eyes closed, his heart leaping from his chest hearing her using that pet name for him, “Hmm?”

“Which one’s your favorite?” She asked, still being intrigued about so many things they’d yet to talk about.

But it seemed that Alex didn’t really know what she was talking about for he lifted his head up slightly to press his face on her tits and motorboated her lazily for a few seconds before he mumbled, “Both of them.”

A loud cackle came from her, piercing through the silence in the room as she shook her head, “You’re such an idiot.”

“I’m not lying.” He wholeheartedly promised while coming back to rest the side of his face on her chest.

She hummed, a snort coming from her as she tried to contain her laughter and when she managed to keep it at bay, she actually clarified for him, “Okay, good to know. But I meant which of my pictures is your favorite.”

A soft, “Ohhhhh…” came from him in realization. She laughed just as loudly and then he peeled his eyes open to look up at her with a conflicted look on his face, “You can’t just make me pick one.”

“Well, I am.” Ella challenged him. She wanted him to list every single picture he’d gotten himself off to but for now she could go to sleep just knowing which was the one.

Despite him acting like it was despicable for her to make him choose one, coming up with an answer was as easy as the ticking of five seconds on the clock, “That one of you on the motorbike. The one where you’re wearing that silver bikini and your cowboy boots and that hat.”

She frowned, trying to think about which picture it was and when she remembered the frame she’d posted long ago, she gasped, “Really?”

He nodded, still looking up at her, “Yes. Wrote Arabella ‘cause of that one.”

“Of course you did.” Ella chuckled and rolled her eyes at him. She would’ve never realized that the ‘Barbarella silver swimsuit’ line actually had to do directly with her too and it wasn’t just another one of Alex’s witty lyrics.

“I did.” He confirmed, smiling proudly at her, “No regrets. Though you never said anything about that one.”

She frowned and scoffed at him like he was crazy, “What did you want me to say? I thought that one was about Arielle until I heard the bridge!”

He closed his mouth and let a few beats of silence pass when he knew her excuse was valid, “Oh, well…”

Ella actually giggled loudly at his response, a shake of her head in disbelief and she called him out for his audacity, “You’re so annoying.”

“You love me.” Alex countered with the statement that he knew she would never actually deny.

She hummed with a foolish smile breaking on her face as she confirmed, “I do.”

“Say it again.” Alex breathlessly pleaded, his fingers coming to take a hold of her chin as he craned his neck to lean in closer to her.

There would never be a day she would pass on the opportunity to tell him, “I love you.”

His heart soared hearing those words, devotion written on his face when he stared into her hazel green eyes and whispered back, “I love you.”

Their exhaustion was wearing them out already and the languidness of their movements translated into a lazy kiss. But what lacked in energy, compensated with the sheer amount of sincerity and intent, wanting to let the other know with every kiss just how much of a love fool they’d made each other.

When he pulled back, Ella leaned back in to drop a handful more chaste kisses on his lips and after the sixth one, she couldn’t help herself about asking another question that was poking at her curiosity intensely, “Which other ones are about me? Other than Snap, you made that very clear.”

“Fireside, Do I Wanna Know?, Stop the World.” He listed quickly, knowing just what was his train of thought behind every song he’d written about her. “I made I Wanna Be Yours into a song because I wanted you to get the hint.”

She offered him a sweet pout and cooed at him, “Awh, sweetness.”

“That worked out well, didn’t it?” He added with a lighthearted sarcastic tone.

But she shook her head because it had been her fault too, not picking up on the obvious signs, “Sorry, I’m just a bit dense sometimes.”

Yet, he wouldn’t have her blaming herself for it when he knew he should have just spoken up, “S’alright. I should’ve just told you.”

Just to tease him, Ella nodded and agreed, “You really should’ve.” As if she hadn’t been keeping it hidden for far too long too.

He shook his head and rolled his eyes in amusement before smiling brightly, “Nice to be able to say it now.”

She nodded, thinking nothing else would ever compare to the feeling that flooded her when he said he loved her for the first time and it only got better and better the more he repeated it. The peace that she felt when she let those three words out was just as good, “It’s relieving.”

“I love you.” Alex told her, his eyes taking in every detail of her face as it lit up when hearing those words.

Ella brought her hand up to his face to cup his jaw and reciprocate sweetly, “I love you.”

One more kiss was shared, another one of those teeth-rottingly cute ones that left each other dazed. The heat of their bodies beneath the covers was making it harder for Alex to stay up so he broke the kiss and mumbled against her lips, “Right, darling. Close those pretty eyes of yours and go to sleep yeah? Long day tomorrow.” She’d fully distracted him from cleaning up the house and getting it ready, nevermind for the party but he’d been planning on tidying everything up for when she’d come over, if he’d actually had the chance to prepare the candlelit dinner for her.

“Hmm right.” Ella whispered back.

It was hard to know if the fact that everyone else was coming over the very next day was gonna make her want to sleep as soon as possible, dreading the exhaustion that evening would bring, or if it was gonna make her nervous enough to keep her eyes open for far longer than necessary.

All because Alex started rubbing circles on the skin of her thigh just as he let his eyes flutter closed and wished her, “Sweet dreams, darling.”

Seeing Alex’s face starting to melt into a blissful stupor, she forced her eyes closed and wished him back, “Sweet dreams, my love.”

It was impossible for him to keep that stupid smile off his face when she called him that, “I like the sound of that.”

She giggled, her cheeks heating up again. “Go to sleep.” She called him out, trying to bite back her smile to push herself into her slumber.

With the dark behind their eyelids being the only thing they could see then, it was impressive the way they found each other’s lips again and shared one more quick and soft kiss before they could actually succumb to their exhaustion. The foolish grins on their faces stuck there until they fell deep in sleep, arms wrapped around each other and legs tangled to keep the other as close as possible, not wanting to let go anytime soon.

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

The domesticity continued well into the following morning, after Alex woke Ella up with an attack of kisses all over her face which ended in them holding the other as they worked their ways to an orgasm, whispering sweet nothings and looking into each other’s eyes intently as pleasure washed over them.

Brushing their teeth together before changing the sheets yet again—this time bringing the freshly washed ones in Alex’s room and putting the one’s they’d borrowed from the guest room in the wash—, making breakfast together and getting comfortable on the settee to eat.

Ella’s legs were thrown over his lap and he was trying his best to keep one hand on her thigh, rubbing circles on her skin while they ate. The only sound that rumbled through the house was the consistent hum of the AC that kept the house cool, outside the sun was heating up the ground and the water that filled the pool; they broke the silence from time to time to hum when they had another bite of the scrambled eggs and sausage he’d made.

It was hard to imagine everything else was going by normally outside the walls of Alex’s house. It felt like they were stuck in their own little bubble and pure happiness simmered inside them, butterflies fluttering inside their stomachs and their smiles just stuck on their faces so their cheeks ached from how much they were smiling already despite it just barely being nine in the morning.

Alex already felt the need for this to be routine, for this to be his normal so with a soft squeeze to her bruised thigh, he let out, “I could get used to this, y’know.”

It was so easy to agree, when Ella felt so complete right there. Everything felt right, all worries had been stripped away from her and she felt light and carefree, like she was soaring and the only weight was the love that filled her heart and swelled it until it tripled in size. She hummed in agreement, “Mhmmm, me too.” But just to tease him, like she was growing to adore, she joked by tapping her fork on the almost empty plate, “This is so good.”

An eye roll was added there along with a soft moan so that she could emphasize how good she meant the food was and, even though she wasn’t lying, Alex still gasped aloud, mockingly insulted.

A string of giggles fell from her lips and she set the plate down on the coffee table next to her coffee cup to cup his face with both hands and promise, “I’m joking.” Ella pressed her lips over his, their eyes fluttering close at the feeling, and she pulled back softly after a few seconds to genuinely say, “This just feels so right.”

With a smile, he also set his plate down on the coffee table and settled back on the settee to look at her and admit, “You know, you actually beat me to it by a few hours.”

A soft frown appeared on her face as she brushed his hair back, “Beat you to it?”

He nodded and told her just what he’d been planning for her later that night, “Was gonna call you and invite you over for dinner. I’d bought some things earlier to make you your favorite pasta and a bunch of candles to set it all up outside by the pool.”

“Awh sweetness…” Ella cooed as she shuffled even closer to him, “You’re so fucking cute.”

Alex kissed the soft pout off her face and hummed into her mouth before pulling back and smirking, “It was gonna be really cute but then you surprised me instead.”

She shook her head in disbelief not only at the fact that she missed that but also of her own actions, “Can’t believe I ruined your cute little plan by barging in and going on a crying rant.”

But Alex couldn’t disagree more with her choice of words, “You didn’t ruin anything, darling.”

“It was...” Ella started, trailing off to think of a proper word to describe what that had been and when recalling it in her mind, she closed her eyes in painful embarrassment and concluded, “A whole mess.”

“Nah, I loved it.” Alex said wholeheartedly, cupping her jaw and rubbing soothing circles on her face to have her open her eyes, “Not seeing you cry though, that broke my heart.” Her words echoed inside his head and his brows furrowed as worry washed over his gaze, “Did you really think I was ever going for Alexa when I have you?”

She averted her gaze but she tutted softly and tilted her face so she’d look him in the eye again. Biting her tongue, she took a deep breath and her fingers fiddled with the hem of her shirt before she mumbled, “Well if you’d read that article and seen all the shit people keep saying online then you’d know how I felt.”

“What article, love?” He’d no clue what she was referring to and if he could see it and get a link to it so he could send it to his PR team, he would do it in a heartbeat and ask them to do their best to take the bloody thing down. “Show it to me.”

Silently, Ella nodded and left him with a kiss on the settee to get her phone. She found it with ease as it was saved in Breana’s chat, and she held her breath when it loaded and showed on her screen. The stupid fucking article that had made her miserable for days. She had herself to blame for that too but she couldn’t not when that was going around social media and people took it like gospel.

Ella bit on her thumb when she sat down next to Alex and offered him the phone opened on the article. She watched attentively as he started reading and taking in every way his pursed lips twitched and his brows lifted and furrowed.

A loud scoff came from him when he read that last sentence and he shook his head, closing the tab and setting Ella’s phone down on the coffee table. “Utter wank.” That was all he could describe it as. And to completely clear things up, he explained, “We were chatting about you that morning, actually.”

“What?”

Alex grabbed her ankles and threw her legs over his lap again, wrapping an arm around her waist to bring her as close as he could to him before he could add, “Like I told you yesterday, she was there when I realized I love you. So when she heard that we were in New York and had just played a festival, she texted me and we met up. We were walking around smoking and I told her about the house and moving here and wanting to tell you and she gave me loads of ideas about how to tell you, the candlelit dinner being one of them.”

Ella’s mouth fell open agape at the information. She couldn’t believe not only had Alexa been there when he realized he was in love with her, she had given him ideas on how to finally tell her.

Her cheeks tinted bright pink and she let her head fall on Alex’s shoulder. He felt her shake her head and sigh heavily, “Ugh, fuck. I feel so stupid.”

Alex shook his head and rubbed up and down her legs to soothe her, “It’s all the media's fault and all those chatting shit online.” He got angrier when recalling all the idiotic implications written on that page, “Dunno what the fuck they’re going on about Cookie’s wedding either. Just a bunch of bollocks, that.”

Ella hummed as she took in the way he reacted to what he’d just read, his look of disdain when reading each sentence was imprinted in her mind. In a moment of utter sincerity, she started explaining what had gone through her head when reading the article, “It really just made me feel the same as 2012 when you went for Arielle after our date and I–,” it was hard to compare because it was a very different situation but the ugly feeling that had flooded her system was just the same only amplified tenfold, “I thought the worse and I didn’t want to be left broken like back then so I started overwhelming myself to just anticipate what was coming.”

Alex’s hand coming to hold hers and intertwine their fingers coaxed her out of her mind and she looked up at him with a sorrowful smile. He kissed the back of her hand and she said the last thing she wanted to ever utter about the matter, the one thing that had been haunting her the most, “I think what freaked me out the most was that last line. I had no idea you were engaged to her.”

“Never was.” Alex wholeheartedly said while still holding tightly onto her hand, “It’s just one of them things people take out of context. Must’ve told someone I wanted to marry her back when we were together and they probably went straight to the tabloids to exaggerate it and make it a piece of hot gossip.”

A faint, pathetic “Oh,” fell from her lips. She couldn’t keep his gaze because she felt embarrassed, she almost pulled her hand back but his touch was soothing and it was all she needed as she added, “My head was spinning. I thought if I already had no chance in ever coming close to the Alexa Chung then the history between you would make it entirely impossible to compare.”

With a pull to her hand, Alex made her look up again and once he could see those gorgeous eyes of hers, he shook his head, “That’s so far from the truth, darling.” Grabbing her other hand, he pulled her towards him so she shuffled and changed the position of her legs, coming to straddle him.

He cupped her face with both hands, watching every detail on her face adoringly, taking one of his hands up to her hair so he could rake through it with his fingers as he said, “No one comes even close when compared to you, Ella. You’ve been all I could ever think about for a while. Just the thought of you drives me mad. I’m all yours, I’ve always been.”

Silence fell around them as they took in each other’s expression. His face shined with devotion and her worried frown had melted into complete infatuation.

Cupping his face with her hands and softly rubbing circles on his jaw, she quietly asked, “Mine?”

“Yours.” Alex smiled brightly, an almost imperceptible nod made her fingers hold onto him the tiniest bit together.

It was as true a statement as her declaring, “I love you.”

And he knew. He felt it just the same, his heart beating in the same erratic pattern as hers, “I love you so much darling.”

She leaned in closer to him, breaths mixing together and their parted mouths ready to slot together and make the distance disappear between them, “I’m yours too, you know.”

His throat dried up at her words, it would take him time to realize this was actually real and not one of those dreams he had felt too crazy to lose himself in before.

“And for that I’m the luckiest man alive.”

They met in the middle to share yet another kiss that only assured for them to continue getting addicted to the taste of each other’s mouth. It was soft at first, deliberate and full of intent, but when his tongue brushed her bottom lip and she opened her mouth to welcome him in, it grew hungry and needy.

It was more than clear that they only had a few days to enjoy their bliss before he had to go on tour again. He’d shown her the schedule while they made breakfast and they knew once he left on the 2nd to tour festivals in Europe, they wouldn’t be able to see each other until he came back for three shows in different cities in California in August. And then he’d be off again. So it would be a little over a month that they’d be away from each other, and those three days they’d get would go by way faster than they’d need. It was just how time always treated them.

Therefore, they knew to take advantage of every minute they got with each other. To drink it all in and not take it for granted, to indulge in it all.

So it wasn’t surprising when his hands came to rest on her hips and he pressed her flush against his hips, he was already hard for her. A needy whine fell from her lips at the friction, his breath hitched in his throat when she rolled her hips, keeping her gaze on his to watch his face contorted in pleasure.

Alex threw his head back and rolled his eyes, “This is what you do to me.” Struggling to pick his head back up, he grabbed one of her hands and guided it between their bodies so her fingers could wrap over the bulge tenting his joggers. She squeezed softly and a groan rumbled through his chest, “One look at you and I’m fucking ruined.”

Her tongue poked between her lips to wet them as she looked down and continued stroking him through his clothes. Alex took in the view, her mouth agape and almost watering at the outline of his cock pressing against his joggers, her hand moving on him now more confidently as he tried swallowing his whimpers, her bruised thighs spread open and on each side of his legs.

“I mean, look at you.” He said raggedly, struggling to catch his breath. “Fuck.”

When Ella looked back up at him, she took in the way his chest flushed. He was still shirtless, and she’d been smirking all morning, shamelessly gawking at him. But now the pink hue his skin was turning contrasted with the dark red bruises she’d left on him the night before.

His breath grew heavier when she leaned in and kissed over the big bruise that adorned that sweet spot on the base of his throat, “Did a good job,” she said before licking up the side of his neck until she reached his earlobe, she bit it and tugged, letting it free after a pathetic whimper stumbled through his lips.

She leaned back slightly and stopped the movement of her hand on his cock, making him cry out at the loss of her consistent touch building on his pleasure.

Smirking, she whispered in his ear, “Wanna write my name all over you.”

Alex shuddered when her breath fanned on his skin as she made her way down his neck, only to start her abuse on his skin all over again, finding patches of pale skin in between the bruises that she felt the need to fix.

His hips bucked upwards when she bit on a bruise, the pain rippling through his body and turning it into eye watering pleasure that had him a mess of whispered profanities and her name as she went.

A broken moan came from him when she finished sucking a bruise over his heart and went straight back to dig her teeth on a patch of tender skin. “Awh baby.” Ella cooed when she straightened up and looked at his tear glazed eyes, “You okay? Want me to stop?”

She had started lifting herself off his lap when he shook his head eagerly, “No. Don’t.”

Alex pulled her back down on his lap, this time so her cunt was right over his hard length and she moaned when he used his firm hold to guide her into rolling her hips over him and his cock brushed her clit.

His brows furrowed in pleasure, a moan stuck on his throat, he managed out a shaky, “I need you.”

And Ella needed him too. She was wet and throbbing for him already, clenching around nothing and all she could think of was how good he stretched her out. She needed him inside her again. But she couldn’t help herself, pouncing on his lips with lust and an animalistic need that made her rock her hips at a quickening pace over him.

When his mouth went slack and he couldn’t kiss her back anymore, she took it as the cue to get off his lap and quickly undress. His shirt she’d been wearing was thrown behind the settee and the boxers she’d borrowed quickly followed.

Completely naked, Ella came to straddle him again. Alex’s hands fell on her waist and slowly trailed up until he could cup her breasts, fingers pinching each nipple and mouth parting in a silent gasp when her hands fell on his shoulders and she started rolling her drenched cunt over his clothed bulge.

“You’re gonna be the end of me.” Alex swore under his breath, her wetness already ruining his joggers. He could feel his own precum leaking and aiding in wetting the fabric along with her own slick.

Ella hummed, stopping her tantalizing movements to lift herself up and off his lap, enough for her to pull down the waistband of his joggers and his hard cock to spring out and brush against his lower stomach. They didn’t even think of getting them off him fully, halfway down his thighs was enough for them to carry on.

Her mouth watered at the sight, the hairs of his happy trail being wet by the salty arousal that leaked out of his tip. With nimble fingers, she grabbed his length and pumped him. Once, twice. Fuck. He was heavy, swollen in her hand.

Her thumb swiped the precum off him and brought it up to her mouth, sucking devotedly to memorize every detail of him.

How he shivered beneath her, how he tasted on her tongue, how he dug his nails in her skin to silently beg her to hold him again, how he looked as he panted and tried his best to go along the pace she set, the aroma of sex already lingering in the air surrounding them.

Every one of her senses was completely overcome by him, and she greedily wished for it to remain the same until she took her last breath.

“And you’ll be mine.” Ella reciprocated, hand coming down between their bodies to wrap around his cock again. No more time to waste anymore when the need for each other started to morph into an ache.

She took him and rubbed him up and down her folds, reveling in the way his face fell at the contact with her sopping cunt. The tip of his cock teased her entrance, and she concluded, “What a way to fucking go,” as she sank down on him.

Words struggled to come out of his mouth the more she swallowed him whole, “I love you–,” he started to say, just wanting to praise her for how good she was to him, how well she took him, but his thoughts melted into the puddle of pleasure she brought him and all he could do was curse under his breath when he bottomed out, “Oh fuck.”

Catching her breath with shallow inhales, Ella pressed her forehead against his and their lips brushed as she sighed, “All mine. Only mine.”

Their eyes rolled into the back of their skulls when she started rolling her hips, the angle heavenly and making them a mess of moans and whimpers.

“Feels so good baby.” Alex praised, wrapping an arm around her waist to keep her as close as possible. Her pebbled nipples rubbing against his chest, his senses going haywire. Ella, Ella, Ella. It was just her, all his mind knew. His heart, body and soul shared the same knowledge. “You’re a fucking dream.”

She hummed, he felt so good inside her. Every roll of her hips meant his cock nudged against that spot inside her that drove her mad, and her clit pressed on him deliciously. She was delirious from the pleasure, “Love– fuckkkk. Love you.”

Stilling for one second, she stabilized on her knees and started moving up and down on his cock. The friction of him dragging in and out of her velvety walls made them gasp, she was making a mess of him.

A high pitched moan fell from her lips, straight into his open mouth when one of his hands smacked harshly against her ass. The sting of the spank dwindling into white heat that only made her mewl louder when she bounced back down on his cock.

“Again, please.”

Her wishes were his command, so he did it again. Reveling in the feeling of her walls clenching around him with every hit. Because she kept asking for more and more, her breaths growing shallow, her cries of pleasure getting louder and louder. He was sure he’d see the red print of his hand there with how hard and often he was spanking her.

His fingers dug harshly in the tender flesh of her ass, helping her glide up and down his cock. He looked down to watch how easy it was for her to take him over and over, “So good to me, darling. Fucking made for my cock, weren’t you?”

“Yes.” She gasped out in agreement, they fit together like the pieces of a puzzle. A delicious, brain-melting, toe-curling puzzle that brought her closer and closer to the edge.

Her hips got faster, thighs burning from the effort but she wasn’t relenting, not when she felt that coil in her lower stomach tightening with every stroke. The slaps of their slick covered skin meeting made her smirk, “We’re gonna make a mess here.”

The image of her squirting all over him the night before flashed through his mind, a guttural moan coming from him at the possibility of it happening again, “I don’t care.”

“Already wanna ruin your new furniture?” Ella giggled breathlessly.

He nodded, biting his bottom lip to muffle a loud moan when she picked up her pace. He was gonna spill inside her any second now if he didn’t focus on holding out until she could cum with him. His words came out strangled by the effort, “I’ll ruin every inch of this house with you.”

“Yeah? What are we ruining baby?” Her voice was molten lust that washed all over him, fingers digging harder into her flesh.

Every scene played in his mind like a film, his mouth moved quickly with each frame, “Gonna bend you over the kitchen counter, have you make a mess all over the marble. Have a feast of this sweet cunt on the dinner table. You’re gonna see how well you take it when I fuck you in front of that mirror in my room.” She dipped her face to suck a bruise on the skin right below his ear, “We– Oh fuckkkk…”

With those plush wet lips of hers she stole his thoughts, making him crumble into a blubbering mess as she marked him up.

She let go of the patch of skin with a pop, licking over it with her eager tongue. “Yeah? Promise?” She whined, needy and begging for him to already make all that reality.

“Promise baby.” He moaned in response, “Ella… Shit.” He couldn’t hold out any longer, he was so close and he knew she was too with the way her legs started trembling. He needed her to cum with him and to drench him again so he brought a hand down in between them and started rubbing quick circles on her clit.

A broken gasp fell from her mouth, he swallowed it with a quick wet kiss but she caught his wrist and pulled his hand away. “Don’t.” She knew exactly what he was trying to do. “We can’t just throw your settee in the washing machine.”

He was about to complain but those fucking hips of hers wouldn’t relent and he was losing grasp around reality and any sort of logic. His need for release took over and pressing a hand down on the settee while the other still clutched her tightly to his chest, he started bucking his hips up, every thrust more determined, meeting in the middle as she fucked herself on his cock.

“Shit, yes! Keep– Ohh!” Ella couldn’t even properly speak, she was almost drooling from how fucking good it felt, how fucking well he slammed his hips up into hers. One arm wrapped around his neck and the other making sure to keep a good grip on the back of the settee, she mewled into his mouth, “Like that. Like that. M’so close baby.”

“Cum with me darling.” Alex struggled to say, his words strained as he got closer and closer to his climax. His thighs started trembling but he did his best to continue, cursing as it took all of him not to stop, “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”

Her legs shook beside his hips, her hips stuttered as she tried to continue riding him. Panting into each other’s mouths, they came. Crying out each other’s name, holding onto the other for dear life as their minds went blank and their sight was overcome by nothingness except for the feeling of him twitching inside her and coating her walls with his cum.

Sloppily, they rode out their highs until Alex slumped back down on the settee with Ella, almost dead weight on top of him. Their heavy breaths sounded like blissful sighs with every exhale.

It was an unearthly feeling to have this all with each other at last. So fucking perfect, they weren’t fully conviced this wasn’t a dream.

Ella giggled when she opened her eyes and found him blissed out, eyes closed and trying to gather his bearings, “Mmm, that was so good.” Not only was the sex amazing, she felt fulfilled in every possible way, her soul was vibrating with joy. She felt whole.

“Match made in heaven.” Alex finally opened his eyes as he stated, wholeheartedly. He could fucking write it on stone.

With a raise of her brows, she teased, “Doubt this scene is anything worthy of holiness, sweets.”

Alex shook his head and took his time to look her up and down, his cock twitching inside her when seeing himself still buried deep inside her and their slick covered thighs. Her chest was flushed and heaving still, all those bruises looming on her made his mouth water as well as those tits of hers that he couldn’t help but cup softly. She looked at him expectantly with the prettiest smirk he’d ever seen, like she was trying not to show her amusement at the way her body had him hypnotized.

With that view, it was so easy for him to confirm, “Nothing’s near as divine as you are, love.”

She snorted out a laugh and shook her head, brushing the strands of hair that stuck to his sweaty forehead, “I’d say you’re just saying that to get lucky tonight but you’re balls deep inside me and I can already feel your cum dripping out of me.”

He laughed with her and stole a quick kiss that she delved in for a few seconds, breaking it to lift herself up and off him to clean themselves up before it all dripped and stained the settee. But her legs shook intensely and she wasn’t able to even hover above him enough for him to pull out.

With a kiss on her cheek, Alex mumbled, “I got you,” before he carefully stood up as he held her with one arm. She wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and held on so he could stand up without her slipping off his hold.

Step by step, slow and steady, he carried her and took her to the bathroom, there he carefully got inside the glass doors that surrounded the shower and carefully lifted her up and off him, and onto the floor.

Ella knew right then that every shower she took after he left would be lonely when she didn’t have him massaging her shoulders and her scalp, or when he wasn’t giggling with her as she molded his shampooed hair into odd hairstyles. She would miss the kisses he dropped on her face and her shoulders as the water rained over them, and how he’d intertwine their fingers when walking out of the shower.

“Our coffee is definitely cold by now.” Ella joked when he was plugging the blow dryer to help with her wet hair like he’d done the night before. She half wanted to put on her best puppy eyes and beg him to cancel so they could just go back to bed and cuddle instead of actually setting everything up to be ready for when everyone was meant to come around.

With a fresh set of sheets that they’d just taken out of the dryer, they took on making the guest room’s bed again as their first task. It felt easier this time, and even through the novelty of the scene, Ella felt content and fulfilled like she did when she was at home doing something she’d been doing her whole life. It felt so familiar and just right, her heart swelled in her chest.

When they went out to the back, Ella gasped at the sight of the pool. She could see the blue water catching the sun rays and glimmering beautifully against the pink tiles of the walls of the pool.

She had laughed when Alex ran back inside to bring out a box in which there was a High Green sign just like the one Matt had gotten and put up on the back of his house. Of course, Ella helped Alex put it up and they proudly appreciated how it looked against the tan paint that coated the walls of the house.

There was a big table outside surrounded by a handful of chairs that they moved to the left hand side of the sliding glass doors that gave way into the patio so Alex could set up the food there outside. Thankfully, the pool chairs were perfectly placed around one side of the pool, making the rest of the patio look spacious enough to house the amount of people Alex had invited.

But before they could cheer about having done everything rather quickly, and run back to his bedroom to do fuck all before they needed to get ready, Ella realized she’d come very much unprepared to Alex’s house. She was wearing a new set of his clothes, because hers had been the same she’d been wearing the previous day at work and long forgotten in a corner of his room.

It was about noon when she managed to peel herself off a clingy Alex who was trying to convince her to use one of his shirts and the same shorts she’d been wearing on Friday, but Ella had reminded him of the amount of love bites he’d left on her skin and how she would still need her makeup to cover it if she wasn’t gonna use something with more coverage than her jeans and one of his shirts.

Alex huffed but managed to make a deal with her, one that he didn’t really need to push hard at all for her to accept. There was no way in hell she’d pass on the opportunity of staying over and staying with him every single day until he had to leave.

Ella made it to her house in record time, considering the Saturday traffic and all, and she’d packed everything up in a rush. Her makeup, toiletries, whichever clothes she saw first and deemed okay—she’d gotten annoyed remembering she needed to go to work the last three days Alex had in LA, so she grabbed a handful of clothes to wear to the office—, her camera, underwear and those lingerie sets Katie had convinced her to buy back in April, as well as some things that she quickly plucked out of that fun little box she kept in the back of her wardrobe.

When she came back, Alex had already set all the drinks out on the kitchen island along with glasses for everyone to use. There were so many bottles, Ella actually didn’t know what to expect of the night but she smiled knowing they’d have a nice time.

On the kitchen counter laid many different containers with food: fruit bowls, charcuterie boards, loads of dips for the many crisps Alex had bought, a variety of precisely cut veggies to be dipped as well, brownies and cookies, cheese and crackers, bacon wrapped grilled shrimp, sushi rolls.

Ella’s mouth watered at the sight and she was about to steal a bite of the shrimp when Alex walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her waist, “I ordered us some actual food and it’s on its way.”

She smiled and turned in his hold, cupping his face and leaning in to mumble against his lips, “You just know the way to my heart don’t you, Turner?”

By the time the doorbell rang to announce the food was there, Ella had just finished setting her makeup bag and toiletries beside one of the sinks in his bathroom, her clothes were still inside her little carry-on case which Alex had brought into his walk-in closet the second they got to his room.

After eating the lovely chinese food he’d ordered, they made their way back to Alex’s room and he watched attentively as she started getting ready by doing her hair. His eyes followed every move of her hands and the way her lips pursed in concentration when she loosely curled strand after strand of hair until it looked voluminous and shiny. He grew more and more entranced as she put half of it up in a little bun and the rest brushed over her shoulders.

Ella dropped a kiss on his lips when she unplugged her curling iron and walked back into the walk-in closet to get the dress she’d chosen for the evening.

Since she couldn’t really show off her chest or her thighs thanks to the bruises Alex had sucked onto her skin, Ella had chosen a high neck, criss crossed back, long knitted black dress. It covered her whole chest and legs so she only had to worry about covering the love bites on her neck with lots of concealer and a heavy hand of translucent powder.

When Ella walked back into the room with the dress already on, Alex commented how rude it had been of her to change in another room. She’d laughed about it, deeming needy and horny, but he’d nodded and hugged her by the waist only to throw her onto bed and kiss all over her face. She couldn’t even fight the loving attack because if thrashed around too much, she’d ruin her hair entirely and she couldn’t be arsed to start working on it again.

Alex and his puppy eyes, and those lips she couldn’t resist, managed to convince her to cuddle him and kiss him for a few minutes before she could start doing her makeup.

Ella might’ve acted annoyed when she had been able to stand up and felt her hair all crazy, but she was more than happy when seeing him like that. Knowing that he just couldn’t get enough of her filled her insides with warmth.

Like a lost puppy, Alex followed her to the bathroom and he leaned against the door frame while watching her start working whatever magic she did with her makeup on her neck. He was all entranced, fully smitten and eyes glimmering with adoration, watching as she carefully applied products to her face and neck that he had no idea how they worked but she used in a way that just enhanced her beauty and completely hid away all the darkening bruises on her skin.

“Aren’t you gonna go get ready, sweets?” She asked softly, heavily focused on not messing up her eyeshadow as she applied mascara to her lashes, “You’ve been staring at me this whole time and you’re not even ready.”

He hummed, pushing himself off the door frame and walking slowly up to her, giving her time to put her mascara down and check on the mirror that it was alright.

“You’re so gorgeous, darling. I can’t stop looking at you.” He said as he hugged her from behind, kissing the side of her neck a handful of times before looking at her in the eye through the mirror, “Can’t blame me for getting distracted when this is my view.”

He watched as she rolled her eyes and her cheeks tinted even more pink than they already were from the powder blush she’d applied on the apples of her cheeks, “So smooth, Alexander.”

Tapping the backs of his hands softly which were resting on her waist, she waited for him to loosen his hold so she could turn around and rake her fingers through his hair, “Go change so I know if I need to cover up your neck or not.”

Looking up to see his own reflection in the mirror, he nodded knowing that she was right, and she’d taken most of her time covering her neck up than actually putting makeup on her face. So with a quick kiss, he dashed to his wardrobe and chose a simple outfit, a short sleeve red shirt that he made sure to button up as much as he could without feeling uncomfortable and black jeans.

She praised his speed when he came back to her all ready for the evening, and she waved him over towards her so she could cover up the hints of bruises that showed over the collar of his shirt. Her touch had made him melt under her fingertips, he kept letting out soft moans when she grabbed onto his neck to keep him steady as she blended the concealer to cover everything as best as she could.

Alex giggled when she pressed her brush over his neck after she dipped it in the translucent powder, and while she’d tried her best not to laugh, she couldn’t hold in her own giggles when he acted like a child being tickled.

“Can you not gel your hair tonight?” Ella fluttered her lashes as she asked, a soft pout on her lips that she’d painted a natural mauve color with some lipstick she had in her bag. He nodded, rolling his eyes like it was a burden to go along with what she was asking for. She poked his ribs and he jumped, making her cackle loudly before he picked her up and threw her over his shoulder to go back into the bedroom and throw her on the bed.

Ella knew what he was about to do so she clutched onto his wrists and held them away from her, “Don’t tickle me babe, I’m gonna mess my hair up.” And just because he’d seen how much time and effort it had taken, he nodded and leaned in to press a kiss on her lips and then moved to lay on bed, beside her.

Laying on his side, pressing his elbow on the mattress and his chin on the palm of his hand, he looked down at her lying on her back right next to him. She grabbed his free hand and started playing with his fingers, kissing each pad of his fingers and then making a fist to kiss each knuckle, finishing up by kissing the back of his hand and then opening it up to kiss his palm.

Once she was done with her kisses, she intertwined their fingers and Alex swore he could cry at her tenderness.

“Do you think they’ll know if we don’t tell them?” Alex asked after a few moments of silence.

“Breana might.” Ella knew her best friend would be suspicious about it since she’d been blowing up her phone earlier in the day and the director hadn’t known how to reply to her messages without lying so she just left them unopened. “She was the one who convinced me to tell you already, I was gonna wait ‘til today to see if you actually were gonna get with Alexa.”

The singer kissed his teeth and shook his head softly, “You silly thing.”

“I know.” Ella let out a breathy chuckle at her own stupidity, but changed the subject back to the main question, “Think it’d be fun to hide it for as long as we can and see if they suspect anything.”

He frowned, “But I wanna kiss you.”

“Me too but it’ll be fun.” Ella admitted with ease, and when she remembered something she had yet to tell him, she smirked, “And if you’re good, I’ll give you a reward.”

At that, Alex perked up: his eyes widened a little and his brows rose up on his face. He watched as her pupils dilated right before she cryptically explained, “Brought some things with me from home.”

Pure seduction was written on her face when she licked her lips and her teeth sank on her bottom lip, and that was enough to know exactly what she meant by it. “You can’t just say that to me right now.” He groaned, letting his head hang until it fell over her chest. He picked his head up in a second when her chest shook with laughter, “I swear I’ll call everyone and cancel, I don’t fucking care.”

She pursed her lips and shook her head, “Patience is a virtue.”

“But–“

“No buts. Thought you were gonna be good and listen.” She raised a brow in challenge.

Alex huffed at her clear invitation to defy her and see what that would bring, but he bit his tongue and went along with her game, “Alright, I’ll listen.”

Completely satisfied with his response, she smirked proudly again, “I know you will.”

The doorbell ringing startled them out of their bubble, Alex rose to his feet and pulled Ella up to stand with him by the hand he was still holding. Through the peephole, he managed to see a few of his friends and he opened the door with a smile, not letting go of Ella’s hand even under the questioning eyes.

Alex introduced them to Ella and she brightly smiled at them and reciprocated their niceties. She was trying not to chuckle at how hard it had been for Alex not to introduce her as his girlfriend, his awkward silence after saying her name out loud was comical. And it kept happening with each person that came through the door that he introduced to her, all of them expecting the title to be said after Alex lingered on his words instead of sounding resolute.

He was so cute.

Around five in the afternoon was when Jamie and Katie showed up, and at the sight of the first couple of the group to arrive, the pressure to keep their secret under wraps fell heavily on their shoulders.

It only got worse when Nick and Kelly got there and they asked when was it that Ella had gotten there and she’d struggled to answer; Alex had aided her by saying she’d gotten there early to help him around setting everything up and once that was out, Kelly was too focused on scolding Alex for not letting them know he needed help instead of lingering on Ella’s mishap.

Ella was probably on her second glass of wine when Miles came knocking on the front door. Alex had been knee deep in a conversation with Nick and some guy they knew from the city, and the music that came from the speakers he’d set up outside was a little too loud so he didn’t hear the doorbell ringing. Therefore, Ella was the one to go up to the front door and open it. In a blink of a second she was being squeezed tightly by Miles’ arms, swaying side to side and panicking about spilling her wine on Alex’s brand new wooden floorboards.

The scouser didn’t let her stray away from him for a second, not even when he went right into the kitchen and got himself a drink, topping off Ella’s until she squeaked at how much wine he wanted her to ingest.

When Ella walked out with Miles in hand, Alex raised his brows in amusement and excused himself from the conversation he’d been in. Only when Alex went for a hug did Miles let go of Ella and Alex laughed over the scouser’s shoulder when Ella sighed in relief. Still, even then, it seemed like Miles had been suffering withdrawals of their presence for he took the both of them around the party with him to greet everyone and start conversations.

There were no complaints to have though, Miles was a joker and he never failed at making Ella spill tears from how hard she’d laugh at the shit he’d say.

He was so distracting with his jokes and comments that Ella didn’t notice she’d drank her almost full glass of wine in just twenty minutes so she went back inside to get herself a drink of water and then a refill of her wine. Alex followed her inside and no one questioned it, it wasn’t like they didn’t behave like that all the time.

The singer smirked when seeing Ella taking sips of a glass of water as she leaned on her ass on the side of the kitchen island. He walked slowly towards her and caged her in her place by leaving his glass on the marble and placing each hand over the surface of it on each side of her hips.

She put her glass down behind her, lipstick stain on the rim of the glass that had him licking his lips in hunger. After having his mouth on her for twenty four hours, spending almost two hours now without kissing her once was agonizing. He was craving the feeling of her lips on his and he didn’t care if anyone could walk back into the house and find them.

But just as Alex was leaning in, the doorbell rang again and he slumped against her with a sorrowful sigh. A mocking laugh fell from her lips, she was enjoying seeing him slowly crumble away with need. It was hard for her too, lord knew she’d been itching to have her lips all over him for hours now, but it was funny seeing him suffer like that, so obvious.

Pressing her hands on his shoulders, she cocked her head and in an obnoxiously chipper tone, she instructed, “Go on. Be a good host.”

He wouldn’t let her have the pleasure of watching as he struggled to properly greet someone else, so he grabbed her wrist and pulled her along towards the front door.

The second the door opened, Alex and Ella’s faces lit up at the sight of who was standing there. “Zack!” They both said at the same time, but the photographer wasn’t alone and the stunning woman beside him smiled brightly at them as Zackery introduced her as Lola.

“Lola, nice to meet you, I’m Alex,” the singer said with that charming smile of his, turning to his side to add, “And this is Ella…”

Once again, Alex trailed off awkwardly and Zack knew exactly what was going on. He chuckled and added for Alex, “His girlfriend. Finally!”

Alex’s face fell, “How–”

Ella couldn’t help cackling at how naive he was toward his own failure at concealing the news, “Baby, you haven’t exactly been subtle about it. I wouldn’t be surprised if half the people you’ve introduced me to know I’m your girlfriend too.” She watched as Alex cocked his head, slightly embarrassed, so she turned to the photographer and pointed at him to warn, “But don’t tell anyone, Zack. We're trying to see how long it takes the lads and the girls to notice.”

“Are they all here yet?” Zack asked, enthused to introduce Lola to everyone. They’d only properly met a month before—he’d worked with her on a shoot about a year and a half before and they realized they had friends in common but their schedules never aligned—and gone on about three dates but he had a good feeling about her and he felt the need to introduce her into the friendship group as soon as possible.

Alex nodded, “Just Matt and Bre missing.”

“Right.” Zack shook his head, not surprised at all that the couple who lived closest was late.

But before the photographer could go on, Ella grabbed Lola’s hand and with a smile she said, “I’ll steal this gorgeous lady from you and I’m gonna introduce her to the girls!”

Katie and Kelly sat next to Mia, Davey’s girlfriend, on the pool chairs when Ella came back outside with Lola in tow. Turns out that Lola was a model—which didn’t shock anyone with how absolutely gorgeous she was—and she currently lived in New York, but was visiting LA for a modeling gig that she’d taken upon to have the excuse to see Zack again after he’d just left the big apple a little over a week before.

The sky was painted a beautiful pink and orange as the sun started to set when the girls were giggling and cooing like fools hearing the way her and Zack’s first date had gone like, but then their attention was caught by Alex and Zack coming back outside, followed by Matt and Breana.

Alex and Ella shared a knowing look then, it was now that it all properly started and Ella had to bite her tongue not to giggle like an idiot at the little secret she was meant to keep for a little longer. She thought that if no one was to call them out about it before they left, they’d come clean about it. Her heart jumped in her chest at the prospect of finally letting them all know.

When Matt and Breana finally incorporated the group, Ella knew she and Alex would have to try a little harder so they wouldn’t be too obvious. But that proved to be harder than they expected for they’d always been very touchy feely with each other.

At the start, keeping their hands to themselves had earned them a few looks and Kelly asking if they were alright. Ella had nodded and when the pregnant woman explained how odd it was to see them distancing themselves from the other, the director forced out a few giggles and excused herself as being a little too hot to be hugging Alex. That had proven futile when Katie then asked why she was so covered during a hot summer night, telling her she should’ve chosen a cute little sundress and even offering to take her to Bre and Matt’s so she could borrow a shorter, lighter dress.

So she and Alex started tentatively invading each other’s space more and more every passing minute, realizing just how foolish they’d always been when their behavior towards each other had always translated to something more. Ella let herself melt into him and Alex kept dropping kisses on her skin, they giggled into each other’s ears and fiddled with each other’s fingers as they spoke.

But there was something there, something out of the ordinary that everyone felt. It was palpable and the pair got multiple questioning looks throughout the night, all of which they ignored until Ella said she was gonna get another drink and Alex went along with her.

When they got back inside and into the kitchen, Alex caged her in against the marble of the kitchen island again. This time the wine that she’d been nursing and those whiskey and cokes Alex had been drinking made them a bit more careless about their actions and when they leaned in for a kiss, which exuded need from the second their lips touched, they lost all sense of logic.

Her hands came up to his face and her fingers carted through his hair only to tangle in the strands and pull on them. Alex moaned into her mouth as he pressed his hips forward into hers, and if it wasn’t for the fact that Jamie had been loud when calling out for the two of them, they definitely would’ve been caught prematurely.

Alex had basically thrown himself to the other side of the kitchen island and rubbed the back of his hand over his lips, as if he’d been drinking something and spilled down his chin, when Jamie got to the edge of the open plan kitchen. All the while, Ella had taken sudden interest in every label of each bottle that sat over the marble.

The guitarist knew something was going on, especially when he asked them if all was fine and their answers struggled to go past their lips.

So when Jamie went back outside with a new bottle of beer and a glass filled with rose for his wife, he made sure to tell everyone of his suspicions. Bless Zackery and Lola, they played along as the others threw theories around, nodding and humming as they indulged in the chat and trying their best to not expose the little secret Ella and Alex trusted them with.

“They’re together.” Jamie said entirely sure of his gut feeling, “They’ve gotta be.”

Matt scoffed, “How’d you know?”

The guitarist ignored his tone and explained, “You know the tension that’s always there when they’re together with us. It’s different now, I can’t really explain it but it is.” Katie hummed as she thought about it and actually agreed with him when she started connecting the dots.

The drummer once again, ever the skeptic, continued interrogating Jamie, “So what, you think they’ve been together since when?”

“I’d bet after Tennessee.” Nick smirked, actually believing Jamie could be onto something.

Jamie looked at the bassist and smirked back, “Me too.”

“No, ‘cos then Bre would know. Right babe?” Matt turned to his fiance to ask and she nodded.

“Mhm. And Ella hasn’t said anything.” The model fiddled with her fingers before actually continuing with why she sided with her fiance's logic, “She actually was struggling about her feelings towards him a few days ago.”

But that wasn’t enough to deter Nick, “I would still bet on it.”

Or Jamie, “Me too.”

“You would?” Matt asked, incredulously, and when the pair nodded, he shrugged, “Okay. A hundred quid they’re not together yet.”

“Fine.” Jamie agreed, a gallic shrug that matched his unbothered expression.

Nick seemed just as nonchalant, actually very smug about the agreement, “Helders, this is easy money.”

The drummer was set on his own logic though, so he scoffed and chatted back, “Easy money for me. They’re not together yet but I’m about to change that.”

Jamie and Nick snorted, “Okay, cupid.”

No one knew what exactly Matt was planning on doing to ‘change that’ but he put his plan to work as soon as Ella and Alex were back.

Matt basically let the pair join the conversation he’d started as a distraction for a few minutes before he asked Alex something random about the house. He made Alex take him to see what he was asking about, something about one of his guest rooms, and suggested Ella came along.

The whole group trying hard not to laugh at Matt’s incredibly improvised plan almost ruined his cover, but they managed to hold in their laughter until the three of them walked past the glass doors and back into the house.

“Ladies first,” Matt had said once they got to one of the guest rooms so that Ella would walk in first and, in a blink of an eye, Matt pushed Alex in without warning and slammed the door closed before loudly giving them notice, “You’re not coming out until I say so.”

Ella snorted when hearing that, because the doors locked from the inside so she was pretty sure he didn’t have a say at all in that, “Whatever that means.”

But at the opportunity to have each other alone, together for a little while, Ella and Alex took it and happily sat themselves at the edge of the bed.

Alex grabbed her legs and threw them over his lap, a big calloused hand coming to hold her thigh as he sighed, “Finally some peace and quiet.”

“Matt did something right for once.” Ella joked a little louder so, if Matt was still out there, he’d listen to her taunting.

But Matt had decided to go back to the kitchen to wait after giving everyone a thumbs up outside through the glass. So he didn’t hear as Alex shook his head and corrected his girlfriend, “Nah, he already did once asking Breana to marry him. This is the second time.”

Ella hummed in agreement, “That’s right.”

Alex didn’t let another second go to kiss her again, his hand cupping her jaw harshly as his lips intently moved with hers. His tongue slipped past her parted lips and licked into her mouth, moaning when he tasted the red wine she’d been drinking all afternoon. A giggle came from her at his desperation, but he continued making it known with the way his hands started roaming down her body, groping her tits through her dress and stealing the oxygen from her lungs further when he pinched her nipples with his nimble fingers.

Before she could lose herself in him entirely, Ella pulled away and grabbed his wrists as she tutted, “Uh-uh.”

“But–” Alex was quick to try and fight, his wet lips falling into a pout.

She fought the urge to kiss it away and joked, “You can do this, babe. I believe in you.”

“You’re a cruel tease.” Alex groaned, letting his head fall on her shoulder.

“You better get used to it.” Ella replied while bringing her fingers to his head, scratching his scalp softly and making him moan.

He dropped a kiss on the side of her neck and she could feel his smirk against her skin as he said, “Not going anywhere, are you?”

Pulling his hair, she made him come out of his hiding place and look at her, “Do you want me to?”

The shake of his head was decisive, just like his words, “Absolutely not.”

The sweetness that coated her tone as she easily said, “Well I wasn’t planning to,” made Alex fall back onto her lips.

This time, it was sweeter. The I love yous they had shared in the past day all said wordlessly though the movement of their mouths on each other’s. Gracefully stealing each other’s breath and melting into each other’s touch. It was heavenly, and it meant so much more now that they knew how devoted and entirely crazy they were about each other.

The memory of the last time they’d been forced into a room for minutes made her smile like a fool, leaving Alex to kiss her teeth twice before she pulled back, “Have you noticed how stupid we’ve been all along?” She wondered how different everything would’ve been if she’d just told him she liked him back then, because she knew she did.

Alex snorted, “Yeah. Think we came to that conclusion last night, didn’t we?”

“Hmm, yeah.” She agreed, but she realized that very afternoon how oblivious they had been to their own behavior towards each other, how everyone had been right all along, “We’ve always acted like this though, just never kissed.”

“Or shagged.” Alex smirked.

“Or shagged.” She repeated with a smirk of her own tugging at the corners of her mouth. “The girls were right.”

“About what?”

She knew then she had loads of things to tell him, “How we really shouldn’t have called this just a friendship.”

He hummed, understanding what she meant, “There’s always been more.”

“Wouldn’t have it any other way.” She declared, eyes filled with devotion as she stared at his pretty face.

Yet, there was still a lot of regret that settled in the pit of his stomach when he thought about it so he admitted, “There were some things I shouldn’t have done.”

Ella shook her head, knowing that he’d keep on haunting himself with guilt that he needed to shed off him already, she had forgiven all of his wrongs a long time ago. Rubbing soothing circled on his jaw, she whispered, “But it got us here, sweets. And that’s all that matters.”

“I fucking love you.” Alex mumbled against her lips, eyes fluttering close at their proximity.

Puckering her lips, she dropped a chaste kiss on his mouth before reciprocating with ease, “I fucking love you too.”

Loving him was second nature, it just happened and she wouldn’t ever forget because she just did. Alex felt just the same, and he could prove it with the way their lips slotted together perfectly, how right it felt to be held by her as they kissed and how his body couldn’t stop responding to her touch and her presence all over him with soft moans and gasps, the twitch of his cock in his jeans, the buzzing of every nerve ending in his body.

When their lungs burned and they needed to pull back to catch their breath, they just hugged with the biggest grins on their faces. All their worries about distance and the uncertainty of the future disappeared when the constant of their love was so strong and they felt it seeping through their pores.

But they couldn’t revel in the feeling for long since Matt burst through the door and startled them. “Fucking hell!” Alex cursed loudly as Ella clutched a hand over her chest and she tried to regain her breath.

Matt ignored them entirely and rose his brows to question a vague, “So?”

“So, what?” Alex bit back with annoyance written all over his face.

“Did you–” Matt started this time, but ended his sentence with more vagueness, “You know.”

Ella frowned, pursing her lips before chatting back, “Erm… We don’t know, actually.”

“Fucks sake.” The drummer rubbed his face in frustration, “This was my attempt to get you talking…”

Still completely confused, Alex asked, “About what?”

What the pair, who were still hugging, didn’t expect was for Matt to rid off his vagueness and spout out, “About how you’ve been wanting to fuck each other since 2011?”

“Woah, mate,” Alex said at the same time as Ella gasped, “Matt, Jesus Christ!”

Matt scoffed for the millionth time that evening, “Oh, don’t you two start fucking lying. Alex, I caught you–“

Alex knew what he was about to say and though Ella knew already, somehow, he still didn’t want Matt saying that aloud, so he interrupted before Matt could ruin the moment further, “We were talking…”

Ella knew by the way Alex squeezed her thigh that this was it so she smiled brightly as she started, “Yes. I was talking… to my boyfriend.”

It was Matt’s turn to loudly gasp, “What?! Wait, what? That quick?!”

Trying not to burst out laughing, Alex nodded, “Erm, well. You’re only,” he checked the watch that adorned his wrist and finished, “About a day late mate.”

“Fuck off.” The drummer let out in disbelief, “You’re joking.”

Ella shook her head and proudly denied, “We’re not.”

“Really?!” Matt made sure to ask again.

Alex and Ella nodded.

And again, “You’re not taking the piss?”

Ella rolled her eyes and mockingly suggested, “Do you want me to shag him in front of you for proof, Helders?”

Matt gagged loudly then, “God, no. No. Absolutely not.”

The director hummed, “Yeah, thought so.”

With despair, Matt sighed and rubbed his face again, knowing what this meant, “You’ve just made me lose a bet against Jamie and Nick, you insufferable cunts.”

Alex snorted at the clear pain in his voice, he couldn’t not ask, “How much?”

Matt replied with the meekest tone and the most irritated expression on his face, “A hundred quid. Each.”

Ella couldn’t hold back the loud cackle that rumbled through her, contagious as Alex laughed beside her, “What a shame, Matthew.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He rolled his eyes knowing they had no pity for him. And then he properly looked at them and saw how close they were, so he grimaced, “God, I regret locking you in here now. Ugh!”

Alex’s brows rose and he reminded his best mate, “S’my house.”

But the drummer ignored his words as he was lost in his head. He shuddered and shared one of his thoughts out loud, “I don’t even know if you’re gonna be worse now or not. Honestly, I'm scared.”

Ella let out another cackle and narrowed her eyes at him, “Shut up, you drama queen!”

“Does Bre know already?” Matt asked, thinking for a second that maybe his fiance had been in it all along and hadn’t said anything to see him suffer over losing a bet, like the tease she was.

But when Ella seriously answered, “No.”

Matt smirked, “Oh, she’s gonna kill you,” and dashed out of the room.

“Matt, no!” Ella yelled out for him but he was long gone. She let her head fall back onto Alex’s shoulder and she sighed, “I hate him.”

“I know.” Alex said, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “At least they know now. Can kiss you all I want.”

“Yeah you can.” Ella perked up and sat back up straight, her gaze falling to her boyfriend’s lips and stealing a long sweet kiss before she stood up and called, “Let’s go. But you’re gonna have to hold me back so I don’t commit a crime.”

Alex grinned brightly, “Of course, darling.”

She offered her hand to help him up and he took it, intertwining their fingers as he stood up beside her and once he was on his feet, she started walking towards the door with him following closely behind.

“Hey.” Alex said before they crossed the threshold of the room, tugging on her hand so she turned and crashed against his chest.

Breathless, she looked into his eyes, “Yeah?”

“I love you.” He said quietly, just for her to hear before they could go out and be disturbed by the million questions he knew everyone would ask.

Ella blushed as she smiled at him, her stomach doing somersaults in response to how adorable he was, “You’re so fucking cute.” She kissed him again before mumbling back, “Love you too.”

Apparently, once they walked through the sliding glass doors, the news had spread like wildfire and everyone was gasping and hollering seeing them hand in hand on their way towards the group.

Ella caught the look on Breana’s face in a second, knowing exactly what was going through her head. So she tried to warn her best friend with a, “Don’t–”

That was cut short when Bre said exactly what she’d been thinking, “I told you so.”

“And she said it.” Ella sighed in defeat, earning the laugh of everyone around as well as questions about what she meant by that which Ella quieted down by promising to tell them in a bit.

As they watched Matt grumpily take out the cash from his wallet and handing their respective amount to Nick and Jamie, Miles hugged the new couple and congratulated them for finally realizing how in love they were with each other. Everyone gasped when Alex and Ella thanked Zack and Lola for keeping it hush for a few hours. And the new couple laughed loudly when Zack countered their surprise by calling them out on being too slow to notice what was obviously there.

Now that they could kiss and properly act like a couple, the party felt far sweeter. They went around the party, chatting and meeting more of Alex’s friends, laughing and sharing stories with everyone. The music got a bit louder, and the drinks flowed easier and faster, as well as the food which became more and more scarce as the time passed.

When Josh got there, it was hilarious to hear him yell, “Finally!” when he walked outside and the first thing Matt uttered was that Alex and Ella were together.

It truly felt like they were all celebrating the fact that they’d gotten together at that point and it only made the two of them more and more elated.

When Alex had gone to get Ella another glass of wine, she’d walked over to the speaker and queued up You Make Loving Fun by Fleetwood Mac to play next. Just in time for it to start playing, Alex walked back outside and found a smiley Ella staring at him expectantly, waving him over towards her with a cheeky grin.

Matt heard the harmonies loudly coming out of the speakers and he was about to complain about Ella choosing a song she knew he very much didn’t like when turned around and saw her starting to sing along, directing every word to Alex.

She walked to the beat of the song, meeting Alex in the middle as he made his way towards her. He was completely entranced by the way she looked, staring at her adoringly as she swayed her hips to the staring beat of the song.

Plucking the wine glass from his hand so he had a free hand to hold her, her arms flew around his neck and he swiftly wrapped his around her waist, swaying with her as she sang the lyrics out to him.

Sweet wonderful you / You make me happy with the things you do / Oh, can it be so / This feeling follows me wherever I go

She continued to sing with a massive smile on her face. She let her head hang back and then came back close to his face with her eyes open and sparkling with love.She pecked his lips quickly, leaving him dazed like she always did when she kissed him, and he swore he had never felt more adoration for someone before. It felt like his chest was about to burst, warmth tickling every inch of him, his lips itching to kiss her properly, his body burning to adore her over and over.

I never did believe in miracles / But I've a feeling it's time to try / I never did believe in the ways of magic / But I'm beginning to wonder why

Her hands went to cup his jaw as she sang the chorus again, staring right into his eyes. They were far too preoccupied with enjoying each other that they hadn’t noticed all eyes on them. She swayed her hips as he held her close and when she’d brought her arms up in the air in pure elation, he had grabbed one of her hands to twirl her around twice and then pull her back into her chest.

Don't, don't break the spell / It would be different and you know it will / You, you make loving fun / And I don't have to tell you but you're the only one

She sang that softly against his lips, Alex stole a kiss that he’d wanted to deepen but she broke it when she leaned back not wanting to miss singing the last bit of the song. Yes, she loved the song but she wanted him to know how hard she’d fallen for him and since she couldn’t do it with her own words, she’d do it with a song.

You, you make loving fun / It's all I want to do / You, you make loving fun / It's all I want to do / You, you make loving fun / It's all I want to do / You, you make loving fun / It's all I want to do

Alex held her close, hiding his face in the crook of her neck leaving pecks all over the skin he had available and making her giggle as the song died down. He squeezed her waist as he pulled back up to look her in the eyes and she brought her hands up to play with the hair at the nape of his neck.

Some other song started playing in the background but they were entranced with their gazes swimming all around each other’s faces, taking in each other under the golden haze of the patio’s lights.

“I love you so much, darling.” Alex was the first to break their silence and she was so glad his hold was tight around her waist because she felt her knees go weak when she heard him say that yet again. The alcohol in her system made her so much more sensible to everything that she now had with him and she could just collapse on the floor from the amount of love she felt for him.

One of her hands came to hold his neck and breathlessly she reciprocated, “I love you more, sweetness.”

Alex shook his head as he leaned in. “Impossible,” he muttered before catching her lips, both of them sighing in relief at the feeling of their lips together again.

Ella’s fingers pressed around his neck, making him blissfully hum in response. Her tongue teased his bottom lip, and he obeyed the silent indication to open his mouth. They swallowed each other’s soft moans when they tasted the alcohol on each other’s tongues, Alex bringing her in closer to his front, tightening his hold on her waist. He held back from the need to squeeze her ass and buck his hips forwards. He wanted her so badly, he needed her right there and then.

“Please tell me it’s an incredibly great idea to kick everyone out right now.” He begged, out of breath after they broke the kiss to get some oxygen back in their lungs.

She chuckled against his lips and shook her head, pulling back a little more to brush his hair back and then let her fingers trail delicately down his pretty face. She knew exactly what he was feeling, because it burned her too but waiting a bit longer, until everyone left, would make it all taste and feel much sweeter.

“It isn’t, love.” She disagreed, a smile on her face from her attempt at trying not to laugh at his despaired face.

His hold on her waist tightened as he pushed his hips forwards subtly, or at least he hoped because he couldn’t help himself. Ella swallowed a moan by biting harshly on her bottom lip, she could feel him starting to get hard and it was all very tempting, especially the tone in his voice when he argued, “But–”

But Ella held the best she could onto her logic and tutted as she remembered what was waiting for them if he pulled through with his promise of behaving tonight, “Good things come to those who wait.”

The reminder of her earlier words were enough for Alex to swallow his pain and bury the hunger she could only satiate for a little longer. He’d do anything she asked for, especially when it promised her to make him all hers afterwards.

It only took a few minutes for Ella to be snatched away by the girls and Alex to be left to fend for himself with the lads. It seemed like after that show of pda, everyone had loads of questions and a separate interrogation for the both of them couldn’t wait more than a few minutes.

Alex tried his best to answer the questions the guys were asking him but he was too distracted by watching Ella sitting on one of the pool chairs, surrounded by the girls, blushing and giggling and covering her face as they scooped everything out of her, question by question.

The faint sound of the doorbell was the perfect excuse for Alex to escape his nosy friends, so he excused himself in a split second to walk back inside and open the front door.

“You’re here!” He greeted with a smile when he opened the door and found Alex standing there, “Hi!”

“Al! Hello!” Her tone was chipper as she greeted him. A whistle came from her when she took a look around his new place, she complimented, “This house is stunning.”

“Ah thank you, thank you.” Alex replied with a soft grin, waving her over to the left side of the room where the gorgeous kitchen was set, “Come in, there’s drinks in the kitchen.”

As Alexa walked in and approached the bottles set on the kitchen island, Alex couldn’t stop himself from eagerly telling her that Ella was there and he was going to get her so she could meet her.

Alexa nodded excitedly, joking about him taking his time because she was indecisive and there were too many types of alcohol to choose from.

The singer wasted no time walking back outside and slowly approaching the group of girls. Leaning in behind Ella, he interrupted the conversation as he kissed her cheek and said, “Love?”

Ella smiled like an idiot and mumbled, “Sweetness?”

“There’s someone I want you to meet.” Alex said vaguely.

A spark of curiosity lit up inside her as she let out a soft, “Oh?” So it wasn’t long that it took her to excuse herself and hold Alex’s hand as he guided her back inside the house.

When they crossed the living room and walked past the edge of the kitchen, Ella was shocked to see Alexa standing in the kitchen.

The quiet, “Oh,” that Ella let out made Alexa look up from her glass she’d just filled with white wine.

“Hi!” The model said excitedly, that bright smile of hers reaching her eyes as they crinkle around the edges in such an endearing way. “I’m Alexa, nice to finally meet you!”

Ella was breathless but she reciprocated the enthusiastic sentiment, “Hi! Nice to meet you too.”

Alexa went for a quick hug that Ella welcomed and when the model pulled back, she gasped, “You’re even prettier in person, bloody hell.”

“Oh stop it.” Ella blushed hard when Alexa said that. Ella had just been breathless over the fact that she was even more perfect in person, as if that was humanly possible. When seeing Ella struggle to find her words, Alex wrapped an arm around her waist and giggled, dropping a kiss on her cheek, bringing her back to reality with the feeling of his lips on her skin. Ella smiled and told Alexa, “I was about to say that about you.”

“Ah, you’re too kind.” Alexa said like she didn’t hear that on the daily, waving Ella off jokingly. The model smirked then, seeing Alex’s hold on Ella’s waist, taking it as a sign that it had finally happened, “So… he finally told you?”

Ella giggled pathetically, melting into his chest and nodded, “He did, yeah.”

Alexa cooed, placing her hands over her heart, “You two look adorable together. So happy for you guys.”

Alex hummed, “Thank you ‘Lexa.”

Going back to get her glass, Alexa took a sip and told Ella with a funny look on her face, “Gave him quite a pep talk in New York last week about it. He was just wasting precious time, wasn’t he?”

Ella’s stomach flipped at the mention of New York, this time with embarrassment rather than dread. She cocked her head to the side and pouted at the mention, “Ah, I think we were both making that mistake.”

Alexa cooed again like it all was a cute little tv show drama that now had reached its happy ending. She raised her glass as if making a toast, “Well, no point in dwelling in the past now that you’re finally together.”

“That’s very true.” Ella agreed, raising her own glass and smiling when Alexa got closer to clink them.

After another leisurely sip of her white wine, she inquired keenly, “Did he tell you about my request for a photoshoot?”

“Oh yeah, he did!” Ella smiled as she nodded, still cozied up in Alex’s arms. “Just let me know when and we can plan something, brainstorm ideas for concepts and play around with what we come up with.”

“Sounds amazing. I’ll definitely let you know when I get a hold of my schedule.” Alexa promised. A smirk came to her face when she knew what she could say to take the piss out of Alex who was just silently witnessing the conversation, “Though I would cancel anything for you to make me look as good as you do in those pictures.” She whispered loudly on purpose, and winked when she added, “He showed me his favorite ones.”

Ella couldn’t help blushing, but a smirk broke on her face as well. She squirmed in Alex’s hold, purposely brushing her ass on his front, she heard him hiss in her ear as she said, “Has he? You’ll have to let me know which ones are they ‘cause he has yet to tell me.”

“That’s just plain rude of you Alex.” Alexa scolded playfully with a faux frown on her face.

Ella shook her head and shrugged, “Seems like he doesn’t want any new ones.”

Alexa laughed loudly when Alex’s face fell at Ella’s words. He scoffed and pinched her waist, making his girlfriend yelp before he scolded, “Can’t believe you’ve met her a second and already teaming up against me.”

“Hmm I love her.” Alexa stated, snatching Ella away from his hold to throw her arm over Ella’s shoulders. She started walking away with Ella beside her, Alex calling her out for stealing his girlfriend behind them. When they walked out of the kitchen, Alexa gasped, noticing the amount of people outside, “Bloody hell. There’s loads of people here! Where are the girls? And where’s that menace of a Scouser? Is he here yet?”

Ella chuckled at the mention of Miles, “Yeah. He’s out by the pool, probably trying to throw Matt and Nick in.” He’d been joking about doing it since he arrived, so she had no doubt he would still be trying to find the perfect moment to do it.

“Oh I’m sure I can push him in without him noticing.” Alexa smirked, shedding herself off Ella’s side to give her and Alex a moment alone and calling out a “See you around!” before walking outside.

“That went better than I expected.” Ella thought out loud.

“Of course it did.” Alex said as he walked up behind her, kissing her temple when he was pressed against her back. “No one can’t just not fall in love with you as soon as they meet you.”

A string of giggles fell from Ella’s lips as she turned around to face him, her arms wrapping around his neck, she cocked her head to the side and teased, “Speaking from experience?”

“Definitely.”

Her laugh was cut short as he pressed his lips against hers, her amusement being swallowed by the way he eagerly licked into her mouth. Her fingers tangled into his hair and she pulled harshly on it when his hands fell from her waist to her ass, cupping it before harshly kneading it with greedy fingers.

She moaned into his mouth and he gracefully swallowed the sound before pulling back and declaring, “I love you.”

After stealing a little peck from his lips, she replied, “Love you more.”

But Alex shook his head in disapproval, and Ella knew just what he was about to say. So before he could deny her words by swearing it was ‘impossible’, she kissed him hard and eager, successfully leaving him stupefied when she pulled back to scorn him.

“Stop it before we actually fight over that.” He opened his mouth to speak but she glared at him and that look was the only thing it took for him to keep the words to himself. She sighed, “Looks like I’m actually gagging you tonight.”

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

After the housewarming party, the band had four more days in Los Angeles before they had to leave.

Since Ella had kept her word on Saturday night and rewarded Alex in ways he could have only dreamed of, the two of them woke up rather late on Sunday morning. They would’ve kept sleeping if it wasn’t for the fact that their friends were blowing up their phones and it had gotten so obnoxiously incessant that they had ended up having to answer one of their million calls.

It was Katie, the one calling this time, and she wanted them to join them for a trip to the beach and then out for drinks later in the night. They all knew Ella had to go to work on Monday and every day that followed until the band had to leave so they had to take advantage of the only full day they all had together to hang out and enjoy each other’s company. Knowing how long it’d be until she could see everyone again, Ella accepted in a heartbeat and her own enthusiasm was what finally got Alex up from bed.

She certainly didn’t regret agreeing to it when they all had the loveliest day at Manhattan beach, laughing and having drinks, taking pictures and running in and out of the water. She and Alex had been teased endlessly for the amount of love bites littered all over their bodies and the little marks and bruises in other parts of their bodies from things their friends didn’t even want to know about.

“You animals.” Nick had said when noticing the bruises on Ella’s ankles and the faint marks on Alex’s cheeks, which the bassist could guess what they were since he’d been complaining about his jaw aching here and there.

Later that night, after they all went back to their respective houses and hotel rooms, they met back up at a karaoke bar where they had way too much fun in just the few hours they managed to stay there. They had all begrudgingly left the place when it closed at two in the morning, pouting about the fun time being over way too soon.

It had been horrendously difficult for Ella to wake up on Monday when her alarm ripped her off her peaceful slumber. Alex’s arms around her waist and his legs tangled with hers tempted her to stay in bed but when she remembered all that she had to start that week at work, she knew she had to force herself out of bed as soon as she could.

When she was ready for the day, after making herself and Alex a quick breakfast that she left there for him, she went back to his room and kissed him goodbye. He had been half asleep still, but when he woke up without her next to him, he knew he hadn’t been dreaming. After he got ready for the day, he found the breakfast she’d made him and he’d sent her a horrendously cringe and clingy string of texts that she giggled about when she saw them at work.

That afternoon, she’d been surprised to come back to his house and walk into the completely blacked out house which was decorated with a path of candles and rose petals that she followed out and found the cutest little set up for that candlelit dinner he owed her.

She enjoyed it thoroughly, complimenting him over and over for how good it was and how well he’d done making her favorite dish. And when dinner was over, and they were finally in bed, she made sure to let him know just how much she’d appreciated it by using her mouth and her spit coated hand to bring him pleasure, whispering sweet nothings and telling him just how much in love she was with him over and over until he came all over her face.

Tuesday morning had brought even more of a challenge for her to wake up. She was too content in Alex’s arms and she had no intention of moving so she kept snoozing her alarm, time and time again, somehow managing to go back into deep slumber after every ring of her phone.

But Alex had woken up around the fourth time she did that, and despite him shaking her and whispering her name to get her to wake up, she continued softly breathing in and out, not peeling her eyes open for a thing.

He watched the time on the screen of her phone when the alarm rang again, and instead of snoozing it, he fully just turned it off and took it upon himself to wake her up. So he started kissing all over her face, down her neck and her clothed chest and abdomen but it wasn’t until he got to kissing her inner thighs that she started waking up.

Waking up with his lips burning a trail down her body assured for her to blink herself awake with need buzzing through every one of ehr nerve endings, pleasure dripped down her spine in white heat that ran down straight between her legs.

He stopped when he saw her open her eyes, knowing his plan had worked. But Ella cradled the back of his head and pouted, spreading her legs open and wordlessly coaxing him to continue and to go all the way because there was no way she’d be getting out of that bed without having his mouth lapping at her cunt like a starving man until she came.

That was the reason why she’d been late to work that day and after being distracted the whole time she was in the office, her brain filled with the memory of his head between her thighs and his tongue working her up to her orgasm, Ella knew she had to ask for the following day off to properly enjoy Alex’s last day in Los Angeles.

Her plans for Wednesday had been less lewd. They had both slept in, heavenly giving into their laziness and staying in bed for far longer than necessary. She’d woken him up when it got closer to midday by peppering kisses all over him and then coaxed him out of bed to the kitchen where she made breakfast as he watched.

Then, they both got ready for the rest of the day with a shower—which they definitely elongated as they got lost in each other’s touch and ended up with Alex pounding into Ella from behind against the glass walls of the shower—and once they changed, they rushed out the door to make their way to Los Feliz and catch the early day screenings at the theater to have the whole place to themselves. It was their first proper date to Los Feliz now that they were official and Ella had been skipping down the pavement and swinging their interlocked hands as they went around the boulevard.

A pout had made its way to her face when it was time to go back home, Alex had offered to drive and he’d kept a hand on her thigh and asked her to play her music so they could sing along together. He didn’t want to see her sad yet, even though his heart was breaking little by little as the clock's needles moved forward and closer to the time he had to leave for the airport.

Once back at Alex’s, the both of them started packing. Alex packed to leave for Europe to resume the tour and Ella to go back home now that Alex was leaving LA.

When Alex went to the bathroom to get a few of his things, he quickly realized just how much he loved seeing their things scattered around in the same space and knew it was far too soon but how could he not think about her moving in when all he wanted at that very moment was for them to be together all day, every day.

So, hours later, when they were ready to go and leave to the airport, Alex gave her one of the keys to his house.

Ella was slightly shocked so the soft, “Why?” slipped past her lips without her wanting to.

“So you can come and go as you please.” Alex replied with a sweet smile on his face, his voice so soft it felt like a caress in her ears.

“Alex,” she whined softly. Yes, it was way too soon, they hadn’t even been together for a full week by then but she really wanted to keep it. But it wasn’t that the reason why she complained, it was because she didn’t know if she could take the reminder that he wasn’t gonna be there for weeks.

“Someone’s gotta enjoy the pool.” Alex joked to soothe her, recognizing the despair that shined through her eyes, it was burning him inside.

She snorted, “That’s actually tempting.”

“I know it is. Fucking hundred degrees out here darling.”

Ella hummed, a blush creeping up her neck to her cheeks, her teeth sunk in her bottom lip as she debated, “Well someone’s gotta take care of your house, no?”

But that wasn’t why Alex wanted her to take the key. “Don’t even think about it,” he frowned and shook his head, letting her know what he had actually planned, “I’ll have people come over to clean it. I just want you to enjoy it.”

“But you’re not here.” Ella argued in a whisper. How could she enjoy it when it would be the reminder that he wasn’t there?

He pressed his forehead against hers and sighed, his eyes fluttering closed as he said, “I know, but it’ll make me happy to know you are here.”

She smirked, pulling back so he could open his eyes and look at her as she teased, “Already wanna wife me up, Turner?”

His smile reached his eyes hearing that, and he had to hold himself back from nodding eagerly at the suggestion. He was completely sure he wanted to call her his wife in the future, and even if it was crazy to admit this soon, he knew he also wanted her to be the mother of his children. His pupils dilated at the image of her swollen belly carrying his child, fucking hell did he love her with all that he was.

Instead of all that, he played it off suavely, “Well if you’re also considering it.”

Her cheeks hurt from how hard she was smiling, but she couldn’t help it when he said things like that. “You’re smooth,” she called out with a raise of her brows.

And, of course, her boyfriend puffed his chest out and nodded, “I know.”

“Okay c’mon, we gotta go.” She said as she put the new key in the front pocket of her jeans.

But Alex didn’t move, instead he leaned in and hugged her around the waist, hiding his face in the crook of her neck to mumble, “I don’t wanna.”

He surprised her by easily picking her up off the ground, making her drop her bag to the floor as she yelped and walking up to the settee to lay there with her on top of him, “Just wanna be here with you all day, every day.”

She hummed, picking her head up to look at him beneath her, pecking his lips once, twice and then pulling back to say, “Me too baby. But that’s the cost of being a rockstar, every country wants you to step in it.”

He sighed, her fingers starting to brush through his hair making his eyes grow heavy, “Wish I could just take you on tour with me.”

“Yeah, me too.” She agreed with ease, thinking that nothing would be better than that.

Alex continued fantasizing out loud, “Travel the world with you, live every experience with you, seeing the crazy crowds everywhere we go.”

“We’ll figure it out.” Ella promised with a kiss to the tip of his nose, the pads of her thumbs rubbing softly on his lids to make him open his eyes again, so he could see the determination in her eyes as she said, “Now we’re together and we got this yeah? It’ll be the same as before, you’re just actually my boyfriend now so I can tell everyone to fuck off when they interrupt our facetimes at work.”

He giggled like a fucking fool and hummed, “Mhm, baby. You tell them.” She snorted before dipping down to kiss his lips softly for a few seconds, pulling back only to hide in the crook of his neck and have one last cuddle before they had to go.

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

By the time Ella and Alex walked into the airport and got to their airline section, everyone was there. They were all waiting in line to walk up to the check-in counters, and with the amount of stuff they needed to take with them, Ella knew it’d take a while.

So she went to sit next to Mia, who was also staying in Los Angeles like Ella, not going on tour with her boyfriend either. And thankfully they had each other, going through the same type of heartache, as they watched everyone go through slowly until it was time for them to head to security.

The security line was already so long and the airport was packed so they all needed to go in as soon as possible, which meant that goodbyes would have to happen right then and they’d have to be brief.

“I hate this.” Alex mumbled into her neck as they hugged goodbye.

“Fucking sucks.” Ella struggled to say as her eyes welled up with tears that she knew would spill as soon as she looked at his face.

Alex clutched her even tighter when hearing the heaviness in her voice, “We’ll be alright yeah? You’ll be sick of me by the time we come back to California.” He joked to settle her a little and he smiled when he heard her giggling.

“You wish.” She sniffled as the laughter had helped the tears start running down her cheeks. Sighing, she pulled back and cupped his face, “We got this, sweets.”

“We do.” He promised, bringing his hands up to her face to wipe away her tears. But they wouldn’t stop falling and he started tearing up at the sight. His hands held her face delicately but his words were determined as he said, “I love you so fucking much, darling. I’ll never let you forget it.”

Ella had to press her lips together in order not to sob, and taking a deep breath first, she managed to whisper, “Love you lots and lots and lots, sweetness.”

When their lips met, it tasted salty from the tears. That only made Alex move more intently against her mouth, hold her even closer to his body but not out of lust, because he needed the both of them to memorize how it felt to be properly pressed against each other. The way in which she held his face exuded longing, prematurely really because he was still there, but she was already mourning his presence beside her on the daily. The kiss was sad, a goodbye that hurt three times as much as the one they shared when he was leaving Tennessee.

But Alex couldn’t help but smile in content when he knew he would get to properly kiss her goodbye every time he were to leave from then on, like he’d been wanting to do for so long, “I can’t believe I can finally do that.”

“What?” She sniffled again, her sadness not only clouding her vision with tears but her thoughts for she couldn’t think about what he meant.

“Actually kiss you goodbye.” Alex answered breathlessly, a feeling coming over him in the most overwhelming way; a tear ran down his cheek and she quickly wiped it away.

Despite the ache that ripped through their chests, she knew what he meant by that. The final piece of the puzzle fell and the air changed around them when it all just felt right, once and for all.

Ella hummed, her pout changing into a massive grin as she concluded, “Finally.” 

✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧✦✧

A/N: So... what did you think? I hope you enjoyed it and you can yell at me freely all you want, I know I made you lot go through it to get to this moment lolllll Hope you found it all worth the wait!!! Thank you for your constant support and your comments and messages, I appreciate them with all my heart!!! xxx

Taglist: @imagine-that-100 @kennedy-brooke @faveficz @indierockgirrl @ladydraculasthings @moonvr @unwantedlovergirl @eaglestar31 @nikisfwn @funniestpersoninnyc @andrearroe @justacaliforniandreamer @alexturnersgf69 @yourorganiccigarette @chickenxdrum

[digenerate-trash]

All of my teacher head cannons are based on my experiences with real teachers. 

that being said: 

More teacher head cannons!!! 

(this time I rated them on how well I think they would be as a teacher)

Doren

Lowkey would fuck a student if they got consent.

Gives off “I have a daddy kink” energy but not the cool kind 

Calls students Good boy/girl to gauge their reactions.

Will give extra homework to the whole class if one dude pisses them off

Has a ‘I’m the cool’ teacher thing going on but is really the most uncool bitch in the whole world. 

Would spit on you if he could get away with it. 

Is absolutely a bitch that says “I don’t know CAN you?” when you just need to piss

Will put stickers on your tests that say generic shit like “good job” and “wonderful” 

No one gets graded above a 95% because he personally believes that he knows better than every student and even some teacher's real “I'm the smartest man in this school” energy 

Will put on movies at the end of the year because he doesn't feel like teaching the last week 

Overall 2/10 I’m not learning shit in this class (out of spite.)

Mason

Needs approval from everyone for everything. 

Probably just learning the ropes as a teacher 

The cool teacher. 

Everyone wants a piece of this man and he just wants to swim

Could literally convince him the sky was purple he's a gullible mess

Gym body but puppy personality 

Would throw hands at anyone who harassed any of his students. 

Gentle teaching methods. Sometimes super effective but some students use it to coast

Super easy to get sidetracked

Undiagnosed ADHD man 

Students openly flirt with him and he's got no clue how to respond so he's just like “Haha good joke” 

Would not fuck a student no matter what, 

Clueless about other teachers and the inner politics going on at the school 

Stay in his lane king 

Absolutely started off as a lifeguard and doesn't know how his life got here

6/10 I’m a big fan of your class but it's only because it's easy. 

River

Virgin. 

Has a full life outside of school 

Like two years away from retirement 

When the class gets too out of hand wants to curl up and die right there

Stressed as hell 24/7 

Never married never will be 

Teaching style is harsh as hell but will stay after school or give up their lunch break to help out students who are struggling 

No days off in this class it doesn't matter if your exams are done. School is school and you will learn as long as you are here

Doesn't play favourites but he seriously should. 

Hates Doren (just has a bad feeling about the dude) 

5/10 I'm trying my best dude please stop saying you know I can my reach potential if I applied myself. Its math. I'm not gonna apply myself

Sirris

Says she “knows what I'm going through” but I doubt her science teacher was a MILF. 

Why are you always wearing low-cut tops??? 

At least one rumor about how a student fucked her over her desk and it was so good she hentai came. 

Gentle teaching style but doesn't take any shit. 

Has considered slapping students but never would 

Personal stories that tie into the lesson somehow 

Talks all the time about how much she loves her kid and how much of an angel he is 

Would love to get a tiny kiss on the head from her. Please

She brings a lot of momma bird energy to the class. 

Will touch your shoulder very gently 

Will then look over your test and say to the whole class “Remember to read the questions on the test carefully”

A student has absolutely called her ‘mom’ by accident and she feels flattered by that

Will put on bill nye on Fridays after a test to give everyone a break. 

8/10 Either adopt me or let me make out with you. I'm dealing with confusing feelings! 

Winter

Bro if Sirris is a MILF winter is like a super MILF with no kids. 

Big BDSM lesbian energy. 

Her weekends are booked solid and she has no time for school life to get involved with that. 

Wears SFW leather accents all the time no matter the weather. 

Has decided that instead of gray hair they want platinum blonde and they are rocking it 

Calls her students good boys/girls out of habit. 

Absolutely could beat any of the other teachers in a fight. 

She's super passionate about history and has several antiques which she considers priceless. 

Students who mock her subject are always sorry after she lectures them. 

She's happy to help students during lunch. But not after school. She has boundaries 

Overall 8/10. Im not confused. Fuck me into the historically accurate pillary with your massive strap. Im fucking ready. 

Leighton

Evil. 

Will fuck students without their consent 

Absolutely blackmails students and teachers. 

Dude jacks it under his desk at school while he watches porn after using his admin pass to get passed the website blockers. 

Will send teachers an NSFW link and then mark them for disciplinary action for clicking on it. (Mason will fall for this trick every time) 

Has never and will never hire an outside consultant or HR representative claiming its a ‘waste of resources’ 

Dude will rub his hard dick on your back while you're sitting in his office for detention. 

Piss kink. Don't ask me for evidence. I just get this /feeling/

Will take a long weekend more than a couple of times a year just for the fun of it. But will never allow the same grace to any other teacher. 

Has a file of his favourite students that he meticulously plans to molest. It's like a black book. 

Bro obviously watches teacher/student porn or 18yr/old man porn at school. 

Teaching style is fucking old school. Reinforcement through pain/ruler. Writing lines. Detention sessions are just holding a penny between your knees and standing in the corner with a dunce cap on. 

Plays favourites but if you are his favourite fucking watch your back. 

0/10 I’m not learning shit. And also I dread office visits. If you touch me I'm calling the police.

[catt-126]

>Hard to Love* ੈ✩‧₊˚

ʚĭɞೃ; Part 6: Back in time

Summary: Y/N is in their Junior year taking sciences, and has been elected as the Class Procter for the current year, as Class Procter she must fullfill certain objectives, but what happens when she runs into someone who claims to know her from her past?

Warnings: Bullying/Ab*se, Implied S*icide, Swearing

Story Notes: B/N = Boy Name

♡> prev here next <♡ Masterlist <-

>Play date: Kunikuzishi and Y/N; 2 years old.

"PLEASEEE!"

"No...I DON'T WANT TO!"

"Pleaseeeeee!!!"

"No!!"

"Aaaaughh... one time only!"

"Mmph...fine"

"Yaaay! Mm..Look! you look like a pretty princess now!"

"I'm not a girl..."

"Ugh, Kuni..ku..shu- Kuni! just play along, don't be party pooper!"

>Maths: Kunikuzushi and Y/N; 6 years old.

"N/N..what's 4 × 3?"

"I dunno maybeee, TWO HUNDRED!"

"What about...seven hundred!"

"..Ohhh I get it! because 4 + 3 is 7!! and the answer must be a BIGGG number!"

"Yeah!!"

>Bullying: Y/N and Them; 9 years old.

"Y/N and B/N sitting in a tree! K-I-S-S-I-N-G"

"Guys, it's not funny anymore!"

"Oooh you're just saying that because you likee him!"

"I do not! it's getting annoying you better cut it off!!"

"Or what?!"

"I'll have to ..i'll tell ma'am!"

"It's just a joke jeez.."

---

"Hah, you and him most probably got something going on!, I bet you got him in your be-"

"The others stopped but, what's your problem?! Can you just stop it? It's not funny anymore!!"

"Who are you to tell me to stop?!"

"What do you me-"

"Get over it you bitch!"

"WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM?!"

>... : Scaramouche and Y/N; Age 9.

"...You okay?"

"..."

"Y/N-"

"NO SCARAMOUCHE I'M NOT OKAY! YOU THINK I'M OKAY AFTER GETTING BEAT UP OVER SOMETHING SO PETTY?"

"H-hey calm dow-"

"No! i'm..i'm tired, s-sorry..I just wanna go home.."

???: Scaramouche and Y/N: Age 13.

"Y/N"

"Y/N"

"Oh! sorry.."

"Sighh... C'mon focus on the work"

"Oh, right"

It was Mr. Zhongli's class and he had arranged the class in the pairs that were made a few weeks prior. The class was silent but a few whispers were heard.

The atmosphere between you two was still stuffy, the weekend was a bit awkward..

For some reason, since that day you haven't been able to sit calmly, something is keeping you on the edge. Maybe it was because you're nervous? Or maybe you felt guilty? Whatever it was, was bothering you non-stop.

"Why are you silent? normally your mouth can't shut up.."

"Hm.." Something was holding you back from replying to him, it almost felt as if you didn't want to get too close to him.

"..What's wrong?"

"Nothing." He didn't pry any further and instead just shrugged.

There was a eary silence between you two now, until he decided to break it.

"You wanna come with me during break?"

"Can't...busy and not in the mood."

"Busy? with?"

"Things."

Scaramouche POV ♡:

'She's stubborn..'

He had his head resting on his hand as he fidgeted with a pencil as Y/N typed words into the word document. He looked to his right where Y/N was sitting, and he noticed heavy eye bags under her eyes. He had noticed them before weeks ago but, they looked worse now.

"Did you not sleep?"

"Kinda"

'Does she hate me or something?'

He was about to say something but was cut off by a "Ding!"

He took out a small packet filled with little soft candies, "Hey, do you want one?"

"No, it's oka-"

"Just take it." He quickly shoved a few in your hand and put the packet back inside.

"It's okay reall-"

"I don't wanna hear it."

"..Thanks" She quitely put them aside and went back to the word document. He had a light grumble from her stomach, "Did you not eat breakfast?"

"I don't eat breakfast"

"Then have one of the candies I gave you atleast"

"Not in the mood.."

"..Do you get lunch at school?"

"No.."

"That's..not healthy"

"Hm..uh sorry I have to use the bathroom..",She quickly got up in a hurry and went out the classroom. After a few seonds, Xiangling went after her with a slight worried expression.

The bell for break rung and all of a sudden Xingqui and Chongyun walked up to Scaramouche who was cleaning up Y/N's things, "May I ask, what happened to Y/N?" Xingqui whispered trying not to make a scene. "Did you say something to her?", Chongyun seemed a bit defensive..

"What? No we were just talking she seemed a but off so I tried to make small talk, we talked about a few things but, I asked her if she had breakfast she said no, I said that's not healthy, then she kinda just walked off?" ,Scaramouche had started over explaining, it became a habit of his after that day.

"Ah I see...Well! Thankyou for looking out for her!", Xingqui gave a slight smile, then walked off.

'I..I should check up on her soon..' As he was thinking, his thoughts were cut off by someone, "Soo, loverboyy did my plan work?" 'Fuck you Ajax.' "No, it scared her away, thanks for nothing loser" "Ouch.. sorry?"

A/N: yes. I KNOW JTS A VERY LATE UPDATE...AND SHORT. but it was test week and nkw im gonna be busy on the weekend ☹️PLEASE TELL ME IF THE STARTING IS CRINGE OR NOT😭😭 i dont know how to show past trauma...☹️ yeah this silly little trauma thing may or may not be real😮😮 epic coping mechanisim makimg a WHOLE ASS FANFIC😭😭

Taglist ♡: @beriiov @redactedhimbo @baelloraa @linn-a-a @lxry-chxn @shizunxie

If you wish to be added/removed from the Taglist please comment below!! 💖 tyy for the support !!

[suiana]

OH BOY I'VE BEEN WANTING TO TELL YOU😭 Okay so like the first day this motherfucker shows up he is instant asking me to buy him lunch, and like I've joked about it with my supervisor before so I was like 'haha no, I'm not buying you lunch haha' like all fun in games, lunch time rolls around, I'm waiting for my food and this fucker shows up like 'so what'd you get me?' And then he says that I owe him??? For telling him to do his JOB? but I refuse to buy him lunch then he gets pissed off like bro??? What the hell? Not to mention that he just guilt tripped me into buying him lunch like twice. (Not to mention the fact that he gets paid MORE than me, because he works longer and more days than me. Because I'm still in school, I can only work weekends, while he skips school and works an hour longer than me.)

Anyway, when we started to work together I told him what to do (because he was being fucking TERRIBLE at his job) and he started to sorta make fun of me for it (ex. 'I can't believe that someone smaller and younger than me is bossing me around', and for context I'm 5'1, around 95-100lb, and a year younger than him, so he's jus making fun of me now,) and like at first I was like 'haha... please do your JOB' and he simply REFUSED to do it. As a housekeeper, I have a fairly simple job, just make all the beds you can before you get off because I'm too small and lanky to do the actual job. The time limit is like, 10-15 mins, fairly easy if BOTH of us do it. I take around 7 mins to make one bed, but he takes FOREVER.

Just. Make the beds. That's all.

But he gets whiney and all mad and acts like a kid, 'my legs hurt', 'I don't wanna do that', 'can't you just do it for me?' Like I'm his mom. So on the first I just told him to look at the open rooms and stripe the beds, then come back and help me out.

.

.

.

He didn't come back. After I got done making like, 4 beds, I go to the room he's being lazy in and see him sitting on the couch, on his phone watching funny videos. The next day, he does the same thing. It keeps going on for like, 5 weeks. Each time he does it, our supervisor always gets on him for it. Then this week comes.

We went into different rooms to make the beds because there were only 3 rooms and I did 2, so like he did 2 beds and I did 4...

If he did do that room. Not even half way through, he comes in like 'hey, there's a tip, what do I do?' And I'm confused because I'm sure he already knows what to do with tips, but I just told him to either hide in our cart or put it on our coworkers cart, he says 'oh, I'll go put it on her cart' and I'm like ok, that shouldn't take you long...

It took him until after our break for him to come back. that's a whole 35 mins. Then he keeps doing it. 'I gotta go to the bathroom', 30 mins before our lunch break. Doesn't show up until I'm already 20 mins in my lunch break. Supervisor asks him why he keeps disappearing, he says he isn't, before he then says 'I couldn't find her cart'...

My cart was right in the open, you could see it if you looked past the elevator hallways. Then, right after our break, he disappeared again. The supervisor asked him why again and he says some more bullshit.

Then he leaves because his grandma came to pick him up. Turns out, he never did drop off the tip and our coworker never knew she was supposed to get it. Came in today and my supervisor told me that he lied and that I should just hide the tips from him when we work together (we didn't today, he went to work with someone on the ground floor, where they do custodian work) which confused me because the place we work has a strict policy, if you steal a tip then you can get fired and even go to jail.

At this point I'm wondering if our boss is his grandma or something because he kept bragging that the only reason he has this job is because his friend is the boss's granddaughter... like it was something to be proud of...

Idk, he's just been pissing me off so I've been a little mean to him (nothing too bad, just ignoring him...) so I'm wondering if I'm an asshole😭 -Pretty Anon

no ur feelings are valid, ur coworker sounds like an ass

u should get all ur other coworkers to mass complain him or smth, maybe it'll do something HAHAH

if not, i hope he starts being more responsible because dawg... he gets paid more than u and he's mot doing anything??? 💀💀💀

[boldlyvoid]

Nuclear Reactions: Chapter Two

Nancy x Robins side of the Freezer Burns Universe | Masterlist

Summary: This is the first time one of Gareth's Garage parties paid off for Robin

Warnings: drunk teenagers, kissing, fluff

Word Count: 3.3k

She’s braiding Holly’s hair and listening to music when Mike knocks on her bedroom door. “Yeah?” 

He pushes it open and walks in with a nervous smile. He’s so tall and skinny and weird as he becomes a teenager, but he’s still her baby brother. “um…”

“Where do you need to go?” She knows already. 

“Gareth’s house… they’re having a party,” he explains. “You can come too? Even Jonathan?” 

She hasn’t told him yet that they broke up, surprised Will didn’t know yet either. “Maybe, I’ll see when we get there. When do you want to leave?” 

“7:30?” He suggests, giving them all enough time to get ready. 

She nods, “make sure everyone is ready and has everything they need, I’m not making 2 trips.” 

“Okay, thanks!” He leaves her room quickly leaving her with holly once more. 

“Can I come?” She asks sweetly. 

“I don’t think so, sweet girl, it’s almost your bedtime,” Nancy reminds her. “One day we’ll get to have a party together. When you’re older we’ll be able to have wine parties like mom and aunty Karol do at Christmas.” 

“Okay,” she gives Nancy a hug. “Can I help you pick your outfit?” 

“Of course,” Nancy always said yes. 

At first, it was just convenient hanging out with her when she got ready for dates, now Holly loves helping her choose what to wear. They have fashion shows, and she asks Nancy if she can have some of it when she’s older, Nancy said she can have it all if only Holly knew it wouldn’t be in style by the time she got to high school in the 90s

She stares into her closet with only one thought: I wonder what Robin’s favourite colour is? ‘Cause then she’d be able to pick something cute that would catch her eye, even if just for a second as she walked Mike to the door.

Thinking back to every time she’s seen Robin, she wears a lot of green but that’s just because she’s in uniform and Nancy reports at the same games Robin performs at for band. Outside of band and her scoops uniform, she had no idea what Robin would like… she wanted to catch her eye. She wanted to talk to her and make her blush again. She wanted to see if there was something there, friendship or more, but she didn’t care. She wanted to know robin, that was the only fact she had. 

She settles on an orange shirt and a jean jacket over a little black jean skirt. It was cute, she did her hair up and added some makeup, and she liked it. It was giving… very much Eddie and his friends' vibes. 

Eddie who she knew was into boys and girls, the whole school knew, unfortunately— he made a joke about being ambidextrous in middle school and someone thought it meant he liked boys and girls and he said, “you’re not wrong there, but it means I can write with both hands.” People have been on his case for being gay ever since. 

And then there are his friends who look at each other like they’ve been in love for years, Gareth and Jeff. If they’re gay and in love and happy maybe they can help her understand why she’s never felt right trying to love boys… 

If she looks like them they’ll want to talk to her, and maybe then they’ll feel safer around her. She was good at making sure she fit in for other people's comfort, making sure she wasn’t a bother or unwanted was her main priority. 

She has always tried her hardest to get people to like her, it’s why she got into news reporting in the first place. She was always volunteering in the office at school, helping the office ladies make copies and answering the phones on their lunch breaks. Until one day the Principal asked her to do the morning announcements for the absent secretary. With a bit of nerves, she stood behind the podium, pushed the speaker button with a deep breath and welcomed the students of Hawkins Middle school to another wonderful day there. She did it flawlessly and the praise she received from it was unlike anything else she’s ever experienced.

She’ll be searching for that buzz again her whole life. 

She did the announcements until she graduated and moved up to high school. There they had a mean secretary who wouldn’t let Nancy do it even though the teachers from the middle school had recommended her to her new principal… so she had to switch gears, she needed to find another way to report the news and receive praise from her superiors. That’s when the Hawkins High newspaper got the best columnist in the whole staff.

To this day her best article was on the disappearance of Barbra Holland and the disgusting coverup. Every student in the school read it, every teacher and then eventually every parent. It raised alarm bells louder than any news segment could’ve… and sure, it pissed Dick Harrington off to know that she named his backyard as ground zero as a way to scare parents into caring, but it was a step she had to take. Every kid in Hawkins has been to the Harringtons' house at some point and a girl died in their backyard, it could’ve been any kid, so why didn’t people care about Barb? Would they have cared more if it was one of the Carver boys? At the end of the day, a member of the community died and no one cared to search for her or prevent it from happening again. It was clear she was angry in that article and the anger was so palpable it rallied the people of Hawkins together to shut down the lab permanently. 

She did that. 

It was supposed to be the reason she got her job at The Hawkins Post, she was supposed to be supported and appreciated and instead, she was groped and thrown out. That buzz she was searching for went dead like someone cut the power to her, she was defeated and hurt and she needed a break. She needed to get her buzz back. 

She gives holly a kiss on the forehead before she heads out to her car where mike and his friends are waiting with armfuls of stuff. 

“What the heck is all this?” 

“We’re going to sleep in the backyard…” Mike explains and she knows it's because they don’t want their mom to see them coming home intoxicated. It was a teenage right of passage to get drunk and sleep in a tent in your friend's yard, right? 

“Get in then,” she unlocks the doors and lets them pile in. 

The ride is mostly quiet, they’re afraid to ask why she’s all dressed up or if she’s coming in with them. They don’t come right into the garage, they instead head out back and use the residual sunlight to help them set up their tents for the night.

“Hi?” She gives Gareth and Jeff a small wave as soon as she walks through the garage door. “Mike said I could come, is that cool?” 

“Nah, it’s fine, welcome,” he reaches out to give her a high five. “Nancy, right?” She nods, wondering if maybe Robin talked about her. “Sick, well I’m Gareth, that’s Jeff, you know the little gremlins already…” he points to max and Lucas who ran in to steal some snacks. 

“I’m Kevin,” their other friend steps in, always forgotten. 

“Hi,” she gives him a smile and a small wave. “Is Eddie coming too?” They all look at each other awkwardly, “what?” 

“He’s probably with Harrington,” Jeff explains, biting the bullet. “He’ll be here too, that won’t be awkward right?” 

She shakes her head, “why would it be? We’re friends?” Still caught up on the fact Steve was friends with Eddie??? 

“I was right there in the kitchen when you fought over that cup of punch and then he left crying,” Kevin explains. 

“And I don’t want beer everywhere,” Gareth teases, smirking slightly. “seriously though, you guys are cool after that?” 

She nods, “yeah, I mean… we never really talked about it, we just broke up and things happened with Jonathan and he was super supportive. I didn’t know he cried?” 

“He looked like it when he stormed past me,” Kevin explains. “But who knows I was drunk too.”

“How is Jonathan?” Jeff asked to change the topic away from her ex… not knowing she was single again. 

She takes a deep breath, not knowing how to explain it. She shrugs, at a loss for words. “I haven’t talked to him in over a week.” 

“Oh?” Gareth is really surprised. “Can I ask why?” 

“I broke up with him,” she just says it. Feeling some pressure behind her eyes, she doesn’t want to cry but it’s still a little too much. “And I got fired… it’s been a rough week.” 

“Holy shit,” they all have a similar reaction. Jeff reaches out to console her, rubbing her arm gently while Gareth grabs her a drink. “Here, you need a break.” 

“Thanks,” she speaks into the cup as she takes a sip. “I really do.”

She downs the first beer and makes jokes with the boys, surprising the kids when they come back in and see her fitting in with their new friends. She’s known of the hellfire boys for years, she’s interviewed them for the newspaper and taken their photo for the yearbook, it wasn’t like she was stealing Mike’s friends. He was simply getting to know her classmates. 

“Wheeler?” 

Eddie’s voice grabs her attention as well as Mike's, they turn to him at the same time, “yeah?” 

“Sorry, I mean Nancy,” he waves mike off, making Nancy smile. 

With one drink already in her system she makes her way to him as he asks what she’s doing there, “can we talk?” She doesn’t take no for even an option of an answer and drags him to the corner of the room. 

“Sure…?” 

“Jonathan and I broke up and Mike asked for a ride and I figured I’d be allowed to be here? Given everyone else who’s here?” She whispers. “I kinda… I think I don’t like guys anymore and I thought that you’d be able to understand how I’m feeling?” 

It all kinda just falls from her lips. 

“Oh… oh!” His face lights right up. “Oh my god, this all makes sense now, holy shit!” 

She can feel his energy change from annoyed to overjoyed, she wants to start jumping around with him he’s so excited. It feeds her soul, and it makes her happy, “what does?” 

He shakes the excitement out and looks right at her, “Steve kinda told me how things ended… not gonna lie I was ready to go full mean girl on you knowing you pretended to love him for a year but this makes sense.” 

Her eyes widen, she didn’t know Steve was telling people about what happened. “How do you know that?” 

It's the way Eddie smiles a bit and shrugs, “Steve tells me everything. He’s always here with robin, Gareth’s cousin,” he points for good measure. “Wait, hold on, I’m going to go get them, you’ll love Robin! You go have a drunk and meet the boys, I’ll be back!” 

Before she can even react to all that, he’s gone. It makes her laugh, he’s going to hook her up with Robin… and he’s fucking Steve. 

Nancy knows that infatuated look, it’s the “I’m boning Steve Harrington” smile. 

—

It all kinda happens in a blur, one moment she’s in her room getting high with Eddie and the next thing she knows Steve’s coming out of the closet with Nancy by his side. 

Robin has been pining over Nancy Wheeler extra hard since last week, the way she smiled and listened to her talk and made her feel comfortable… it was amazing. Normally she talks too much, normally people don’t want to listen to her or if they do, they don’t care. 

Nancy cared. 

She cared enough to dance with robin and ask her questions and hold her hand when they walked from the dancing area over to the food table… she poured robin a drink, and she brushed Robin's hair back, she smiled at her like she was the only one there. And she kinda felt like that too. 

With Jeff all over Gareth on one couch and Eddie’s tongue down Steve's throat in the corner, who else was she gonna talk to? The kids leave around midnight to walk Max home, she just lived a few houses down from them— and then they’d be camping out in the yard. And Kevin left a little bit ago, his brother came and picked him up so he wouldn’t have to sleep over and have to hear Gareth and Jeff going at it. 

Nancy asks if she can stay too, having a few too many drinks than she ever intended as she hangs off of Robin. 

“Sure, I don’t think my grandma will mind,” she smiles at her. “There are blankets and stuff too, I can bring some down to you after I get Steve to bed… that’s going to be a fucking disaster.” 

“You don’t have to worry about that now,” Nancy says, swaying to the music with her hands on Robin's hips, making her move too. “We’ve got time.” 

The lights are all off except for the twinkling Christmas lights hung from the ceiling, she can just slightly see Nancy’s face that’s how dark it is. And the music is so loud it’s not like she can focus on much else either… but then it changes. Gareth picks a mixtape that has a different vibe, it’s slower, still heavy, but good for making out… 

It’s also good for slow dancing. Nancy rests her head on Robin’s shoulder, holding her close as they dance like middle school lovers in the middle of the snowball before the teachers remind them of the space rule… Nancy even manages to kiss her shoulder and the side of her neck all while robin stays on her feet and moves at a normal pace. Her coordination is finally working in her favour. 

Just when she thinks she’s going to get her first real kiss on the lips from a girl, Steve comes over and taps on her shoulder, “I’m tired.” 

“Cool?” She tries to ignore him. 

“Where’d Eddie go?” Nancy asks, letting go of Robin's waist and turning to Steve. 

Eddie has slipped out for a cigarette, leaving a very drunk Steve with Robin, so she makes the executive decision to end the party there and take Steve up to bed. 

Bad choice. 

With Nancy’s help, they get his wobbly ass up the steps and into her room only for him to whine and complain his way out of changing and brushing his teeth. Nancy slips away then, taking the living room couch for the night, leaving her to deal with Steve’s nonsense. 

“Let me go,” he whines, pulling away from Robin as soon as she starts to hand him his pyjamas. “I’m fine, I’m not that drunk.” 

“If you want water I’ll go get it,” Robin argues, trying to get him into bed. “‘Cause I swear if I let you down there again and you don’t want to come up here after the struggle it was to help you up those stairs, I will kill you.” 

“I need to go down there tonight,” he tries his best to stare into her eyes. “Please? He’s waiting for me.” 

“Who?” She teases, wanting to hear everything from him. 

“Eddie,” he whispers. “I meet him in the kitchen every night and we talk and hold hands and do other stuff… can I go? Please?” 

“Oh, oh yeah, go…” she can’t believe it, she just moves out of the way and lets him go. 

She follows quietly, sitting on the bottom step as he rounds the corner and runs right into the kitchen. She hears them kiss each other and whisper their little hellos, it’s sickly sweet. 

“Gross,” Robin calls from the doorway, peaking her head around to tease them more. “Get a room!”

“We can take yours if you prefer?” Eddie bugs her right back. 

Nancy wanders over from the living room where she was trying to sleep. “Can you shut up?”

“Sorry,” Robin turns to her without a plan for what to say when she sees her beautiful eyes again, “sorry.” 

“Not you,” she wraps her arm around Robin to hold herself up, she rests her chin on robins shoulder and yawns. “Can I sleep in your bed?”

Robin almost chokes, “y-yeah?” 

“Ooo,” Steve teases, pointing at her. “You better not be doing anything when I come up to bed.” 

“Just go home with Eddie,” Nancy suggests which makes Robin's heart drop into her stomach.

“Maybe I will,” he turns back to Eddie and hangs off him. “I like sleeping with you.” 

“Ew,” they reply at the same time, disgusted. 

Nancy takes her hand and yanks her away from the kitchen then, up the stairs and into her room where she shuts the door and smiles at her. “You got any pyjamas I can borrow?” 

Robin nods and quietly heads over to her dresser, opening the bottom drawer she grabs some shorts and a white shirt and hands them over to her. “This good?” 

Nancy takes them from her and places them on the edge of the bed, she pulls her shirt off and pushes her skirt down to the floor, all with robin right there. And she should be used to it… girls change in the locker room in front of her all the time, it’s not new, it’s just the first time she’s had a huge crush on the girl getting naked in front of her. 

Nancy slips into her shirt and shorts only to unclip her bra under the shirt and pull it out through her shirt sleeve. She turns to robin with a smile, “you’re drooling.” 

Robin panics to wipe her mouth but she wasn’t, she is so flabbergasted with everything happening in front of her that she didn’t even register that it was sarcasm. “sorry…” 

“Do you know any other words?” 

“I think so,” she shrugs slightly. “I’m still high and you’re so pretty I feel like an idiot.” 

Nancy sports a beautiful smile on her face as she walks over to robin and lays her hands on her shoulders. Robin stares into her sparkling eyes, they’re so pretty she could get lost in them. Swimming in the green lagoons as she stared back, “you’re not an idiot,” Nancy reminds her. 

“Okay,” Robin changes tracks easily, her eyes flicking down to Nancy’s lips and then back to her eyes. She’s never been so close to a girl in her entire life. 

She rests her hands on Nancy’s waist, pulling her in closer, unsure where her confidence is coming from… she just mimics the way she’s seen Eddie manhandle Steve… Nancy seemed to be a lot like Steve, it’s why they didn’t work. That and the fact they’re both extremely gay as it would turn out. 

“Are you gonna kiss me?” Nancy whispers. “Cause you can… I want you to.” 

“Really?” 

Nancy nods ever so sweetly, pressing her lips together in a tight smile. They just stare at each other, robins hands trail up her back, Nancy’s left-hand cups her face, and they don’t say a single word. It’s too delicate to be real, neither one of them has kissed a girl before but they’ve spent a lot of time thinking about it. 

“Robin…” Nancy whispers, thumb caressing her cheek, “are you okay?” 

She nods, “I don’t want to disappoint you.”

"You could never." She makes the first move, kissing robins cheek gently first and then the side of her mouth. She can barely pull back when Robin is hungrily lunging for her, kissing her hard and holding her there in place. Breathing her in, fireworks explode behind her eyes as her heart skips a beat in her chest. There’s more electricity in this kiss than the local plant could ever produce. 

It’s nuclear.

general taglist:

@ncsls0515 @stevesmunsons @reidsbookclub @wroteclassicaly @sweetyyhippyy @manuosorioh @mrs-dr-reid @k-k0129 @eddiemunson-rp 

Ronance:

ask to join!

[yondamoegi]

a WIP post

I want to show things before I finish them because I can’t wait to share, ay! But to add some other value than just “Look! I’m making this!” I decided to explain the overall thought process. This is gonna be long

The context: a silly fan comic for The Passenger IF; High School AU; Jonny and Ash’s Meet Cute; Me playing with these characters like with dolls, making up scenarios in my head

1) An estabilishing shot! Jonny is a loner who’s bullied pretty mercilessly, so to show that, I’ve put him into the back corner of the cafeteria near the trash and the janitor station. I dunno how it is really in USAmerican high schools, I’m not american. I also never ate in the cafeterias of my schools (Now I wonder how I survived for 11 years without eating lunch).

2) Suddenly! Someone invades his personal space! To show that I made the invading object bigger than him. Also the paper bag is gonna be darker than him, to add more weight

3) Who’s the invader? It’s Ash! The camera is behind Jonny, as if we’re seeing Ash from his perspective, Ash’s the focus here. I do like their pose here, very confident and straight-laced, if I say so myself. A small halo to show that they’re activating their magnetism

4) A pun! Jonny’s reaction! You gotta add reactions too, if it’s always action action action, the story starts being very distant very soon. Also there’s a thing from cinema and film going on, which is often ignored in comics for some reason

You see, if you have two characters talking, and you switch between them, you gotta draw a line between them in your mind like this

And you put your camera only on one side of the line, never crossing it

This way characters don’t switch sides and it’s easier to comprehend what’s going on

You can see that A is always on the left side while B is always on the right.

And if you don’t follow this rule, you get confusing shots

Did B cross the screen? Did A cross the screen? It’s certainly not the camera that switched.

There is a way to break the line by literally breaking it. Show something else between the shots. 

5) Anyway, returning to our boys. Jonny’s not amused by the pun, the reached hand is rejected. But Ash doesn’t relent! Use that hand to point at the sandwiches, boy! I wanted it to be something banal, yet still weird and off-putting

6) A lot of sandwiches would pique an interest, right? This time the panel is split in two, to show the minutae of the motion - Jonny was about to leave, but decided to stay

7) And here again, the minutae. Ash’s this time. I wanted to show that they’re doing this on purpose, they know what they’re doing. 1) They’re gauging Jonny’s reaction in the first panel, 2) then realizing that the bait was swallowed hook, line, and sinker, 3) and then doubling down on the charm

8) Another joke! Also finally I show both of them at the same time from the same angle. No confrontation here, they’re connecting!

9) A cheeky flirtation to keep emotions moving, even more charisma blast. Close-up to Jonny’s face to show that yeah, Ash’s attack is successful and they got under his skin

10) Let’s wind down with Jonny’s reaction, even more bonding, and even more jokes

11) And to finish it off, let’s circle back to the beginning. But now Jonny’s not alone and the scene is finished with a more positive note

[absolutewhore101]

A Hug Is All It Takes

A/N: sorry it's been a hot minute. i just finished my first year of college, so moving home was a process :)

Pairing: Calum Hood x GN!Reader

Summary: you just really need a hug.

Warnings: bad ending, slight mention of mental health (nothing serious)

Word Count: 846

Minors DNI (no smut, just not comfortable with you interacting)!!

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Something was on your mind, and the boys were starting to get concerned.

Usually, you were one the most lively people they knew. Lately, you’d been the opposite. You weren’t constantly cracking jokes, or talking to anyone who even glanced in your direction, weren’t smiling and laughing every second.

Instead, you were quiet, shy, introverted - not yourself, in short. 

No one knew what triggered it. All they knew is that one day you were you, and the next, you weren’t. 

It could have been any number of factors. Your job, your family, your friends, anything really. The boys initially tried not to make a big deal of it, choosing to try to cheer you up as subtly as possible. 

They brought you snacks throughout the day, and that put a smile on your face, for a few minutes at least. 

They told you every joke they could think of, but never got more than a small chuckle. 

After 3 weeks, they were starting to get very concerned. 

You were stressed. You had gotten some not so great news from your mom, your sister had picked another fight with you and wasn’t talking to you at the moment. Your boss had given your promised promotion to an employee who’d been working there for less than 2 months. Two of your friends were caught up in their own petty drama that you somehow got dragged into.

And your mental health was taking a serious hit. You usually tried to keep everyone around you happy because that kept you happy, but lately, that hasn't been enough. 

No matter how much the boys tried, your mood just couldn’t be improved.

There was one thing you could think of, but you wouldn’t bother. 

You weren’t a super touchy person, preferring to stay in your own personal space and out of others’.

However, the only thing that had been on your mind for the last few weeks, was a hug. The simplest thing, something you hadn’t had in quite some time, would quite literally solve all of your problems. 

But considering you hadn’t had much personal contact with the boys besides a quick high five, you weren’t sure how to ask any of them for a hug. 

One day was exceptionally bad. You were supposed to meet the boys at the studio at 9, but when you spilled your coffee down your shirt at 8:45, you knew that likely wasn’t going to happen. 

And then when you got in your car at 8:49 and discovered that you wouldn’t have enough gas to even make it to the studio, you knew it wasn’t happening. 

At 9:05, when you finally left the gas station, you realized you’d left your laptop at home and would have to make the trip back. 

It was 9:14 when the first text message lit up your phone, a crabby text from Luke asking where you were and why you were so late. 

By 9:27 you were pulling into the studio parking lot, realizing then that you had amassed 7 more text messages from the boys, all wondering why you were running nearly half an hour late. 

You stood outside your car for a minute, collecting yourself. After a few deep breaths and a pep talk, you were walking inside. 

You made your way through the studio to where the boys were, greeting them with an apology, only to be met with silence. 

Were they seriously that mad at you? Lovely. 

A few hours later, around noon, the five of you decided it was time for a lunch break. You were the first to leave the room. 

You made your way through the building to the break room, hoping to sit in there by yourself for a few minutes before you would leave to go get food. 

10 minutes later, Calum walked in, stopping in the doorway as he took in your mood. He regarded you for a few seconds before he spoke up. 

“I know you don’t like them, but you look like you could use a hug.”

Your eyes immediately welled up in tears. He had no idea how right he was. 

When he noticed this, he took a few steps towards you. You stood up and closed the distance, wrapping your arms tightly around his waist as his wrapped around your shoulders. 

For a few minutes, you just stood there, tears silently falling from your eyes as you took in the feeling of being held for the first time in however long. Too long.

Eventually, Calum pulled away from you, giving you a worried look. 

“Are you okay? Do you want to talk about it?”

You shook your head, burying your head back against his chest. He allowed you to do so, not pushing the subject. 

After a few minutes, you realized how hungry you were, and pulled away. 

He held your eye contact for a few seconds before you spoke up. 

“Thank you.” You said. “You have no idea how much I needed that.”

He gave you a warm smile. 

“Anytime.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tell me your thoughts! Thank you for reading :)

[gracelesslady23]

Prongsfoot Week DAY 6 - Questions for this Ship?

Disclaimer: I loved everyone’s answers to the original link. But considering I’m late (whoops) and didn’t want to just repeat everyone’s answers, I used the first 20 questions of from this post instead (hope that’s ok.)

TW: angst, suggestive content, etc.

1.      Who would end a heated argument by defending their actions with ‘because I love you!’ ? 

Sirius. Early in their relationship, he has a habit of making decisions for ‘James’s own good’ that James has to break him out of.

2.      What would they do if the other woke in a manic state after a nightmare? Lots of cuddles and whispered assurances.

3.      Do they wear the other’s clothes? (sweatshirt, bandana, necklace, etc.) Boy do they. In first year, James liked the expensive robes Sirius had been sent to Hogwarts with, and Sirius was obsessed with the few muggle clothes in James’s trunk, so they had ended up just dumping all their clothes into a pile to use together. And although it turned out to be a nightmare to re-separate them before heading home for the summer, they just went ahead and did it for the next year and the one after...

This continued when Sirius ran away from home and went to stay with the Potters, with few clothes of his own and already feeling guilty about taking advantage of Potters generosity (and despite James and his parents’ assurances that they were more than happy to buy him anything he needed) Sirius just lived out of James closet until he got some money of his own.

Even when they are adults and there is absolutely no reason to share anymore and they have developed completely different tastes, they sometimes pluck something out of the others closet (and drive in their partner crazy when they see them… James in a leather jacket and skinny jeans, Sirius in a letterman jacket or polo shirt and v-neck jumper, mmm).

4.      Which one is more protective? Who needs to be ‘protected’?

They are both very protective of each other and of their relationship/connection in general. However, both Sirius and James are also very confident in the other’s abilities, so will let the one being impacted have the first shot and will only jump in protectively if they feel they really need to.

5.      Describe their cozy night in.

Curled up on the sofa in front of the fire, limbs intertwined, talking, joking and laughing together through the night.

6.      Who would beg the other not to leave? James. Who has to leave to protect the other? Sirius (only to be collected and returned home by an irate James the next day).

7.      Would they build a pillow fort together just because? 

Absolutely, they’ll do anything to stave of boredom haha. Only their pillow forts would become so complex and enormous they’d refer to them as pillow castles.

One raining day during the summer Sirius lived with the Potters, James and Sirius built a six story high, monstrosity in the living room having had to expand the size of the living room in order to fit it in and transfigure all the biscuits Euphemia had given them for lunch into cushions to have enough building material. Euphemia and Fleamont were so impressed with the magic involved they didn’t even have the heart to scold them for using magic outside of school.

8.      What happens if one of them gets sick? 

Sirius is horrible at being sick, he essentially pretends he isn’t and goes about his regular routine until he almost collapses and/or James gets fed up, drags him to bed and forcefully takes care of him.

James isn’t much better he throws himself into bed at the first sign of the sniffles, despairingly declaring that he has been unfairly struck down in his prime – after rolling his eyes at the dramatics, Sirius spends the next few days at James’s beck and call until he feels better.

9.      What are their thoughts on having children?

James can’t wait to be a dad and wants a big family to give his children the siblings he never had.

Sirius is more hesitant because he didn’t have the best parental role models growing up and really wants to provide the best environment for any child in his care, but he is more sure with James at his side.

10.  Do either try to hide their emotions if upset? Both (but especially Sirius). Can the other still tell? And yes, in a millisecond, doesn’t mean they don’t try.

11.  Do they have many heated arguments? Hardly ever. How do they smooth things over? They usually go for a run or fly separately to calm down and end up missing each other so much they very soon return home to apologise and make up.

12.  Who’s the bigger tease? Sirius. Sometimes on purpose, but mostly by accident. It drives James crazy.

13.  How do their personalities compliment each other? Perfectly. How do they clash? There is very little they clash on. And mostly their clashes are more jokes than anything.

14.  Do they always say 'i love you' before leaving? Yes. They start yelling it jokingly to each other even before they start dating. After they get together, they just whisper it to each other followed by a goodbye kiss.

15.  Can they stay up all night just talking? Absolutely. Euphemia once joked it was a miracle they got any sleep at Hogwarts considering they never seem to run out of things to say to each other.

16.  Who's more likely to pull the other in by the waist and kiss them passionately? James. Sirius would pull away and laugh it off, but be secretly thrilled.

17.  How likely are they to have fur babies? How many and what kind?

Based on this recent tumblr post, I love the idea Sirius never actually has his own pets but other people’s pets are so enamoured by him that they just kind of adopt him as their new person and Sirius is just fine with it… as is James after a bit of grumbling.

James: Wait, didn’t we only have three cats last night. Where did the black one come from?

Sirius, shrugs while opening a can of cat food: She followed me home last night.

James, rolls his eyes: Are you going to find its owners?

Sirius: It’s not like I’ve kidnapped her, she can go home whenever she wants.

James *dead pan*: Yeah, exactly like the last three cats, two turtles, three hamsters, the brooder collie…

Sirius: They have names, James.

Sirius *addressing the cat*: Honestly, so rude.

18.  How do they feel about PDA? 

They will put on big dramatic displays to make someone uncomfortable or as a laugh. But they are fairly private and protective of their actual relationship.

19.  Choose one song that perfectly describes their relationship.

I love so many songs for them. But it’s got to be Just Friends by Virginia To Vegas. I mean this is the chorus… its perfect.

“So why don't we go out and get a drink in the west end Smoke a cigarette and talk shit about exes Take a couples shots and see where the night ends Stop pretending like we're just friends Why don't we go out and get a drink in the west end One more dance, are you feeling the tension Take a couple shots and see where the nights ends Stop pretending like we're just friends”

[shah-writes]

an artificially intelligent curse

so i read this article about a man who uses AI to speak with his dead fiancee and i simply cannot stop thinking about it. there’s no MCD in this! but you can find my thoughts at the bottom.

tldr; think AI + Inception + Drarry

“Draco’s dying.”

Ron is Harry’s best friend in the whole world but sometimes he can be a bit daft. 

“No, he’s not,” Harry replies serenely. He’s not. Draco is in the kitchen, wearing the light blue sweater Harry gave him last Christmas and a rosy flush Harry gave him two minutes ago. 

“They think you can help him.” Ron is staring at a point above Harry’s shoulder. Harry shifts slightly to follow Ron’s gaze and finds Draco standing there, levitating three steaming mugs of tea onto the table. 

Except. Except, Draco doesn’t drink tea. He drinks cheap, Instant coffee, a consequence of his time spent working in America. Harry teases him about it all the time. 

There’s a slight thud as two mugs hit the table, the third has vanished. 

Draco settles into a chair. “No tea for me,” he says playfully. There’s a small Statue of Liberty trinket on the bookshelf behind Ron. Harry relaxes. 

“Ron was just telling me a story,” Harry shares.

Draco smiles and leans forward expectantly on the table. It’s a set they thrifted last weekend: one Walnut table and four Cherry chairs— one ingredient away from a meal, Draco had joked. 

“It’s a curse, Harry. ‘Mione figured it out. It’s preying on your memories.”

Harry gives Ron a conciliatory nod and reaches out to brush a dark curl away from Draco’s forehead. Draco has platinum hair, he remembers, as an afterthought. 

The strands shift to a blinding white immediately. Or were they always white? They must have been, Draco would never dye his hair. 

“It’s you, Harry. You’re teaching it how to trap you.”

Harry reluctantly turns back toward Ron. 

“What makes us human?” Ron asks. “Harry, I know you can hear me, you just have to listen. What makes us human?”

“I… I don’t know,” Harry mumbles. 

“Instinct, Harry. Emotion and instinct.”

Ron is sitting on a cushioned armchair and Harry wonders absently where he got it. All Harry has are four Cherry chairs. He nearly expects to see Ron’s chair transform into dark wood. It doesn’t.

“You can’t teach humanity,” Ron continues. “You can teach a Thing how to learn, how to adapt. You can force it to consume everything around it until it knows right from wrong. Until it becomes as intelligent as any of us, but you can never teach it instinct. Look around, Harry, use your instinct.”

There’s a portrait on the wall. Four people. Harry and Draco. An older woman with almond-shaped green eyes and freckles over her nose; an older man with dark skin and Harry’s own unruly hair. 

“Hermione’s calling it an AI-Curse. Artificial Intelligence. It sweeps through your mind quickly and puts together a scenario where you feel comfortable. It’ll get things wrong, of course. It doesn’t know which memories are relevant, which are wrong, which are just daydreams. That’s where you come in. You tell It when it’s wrong and you reward It when it’s right.”

Draco’s sitting still at the table. Harry beckons him over. 

“I love that picture of us,” Draco says happily, laying his head on Harry’s shoulder. 

“What is this?”

“Us and your parents, silly.”

“Draco, my parents are dead. They’ve been dead for 27 years.”

Draco blinks. “I know. Do you miss them?”

Harry snaps back to the portrait. His parents have disintegrated out of the frame. 

Ron’s still sitting at the table in his armchair. “Malfoy’s condition is deteriorating. He’s succumbing to the curse. Once he’s given up all of his memories, he’ll die trapped in a fake world of his own design.”

“Stop,” Harry says; and then, “STOP,” louder, facing Ron. Ron doesn’t hear him. Because… because Ron’s not here. Ron and his stubborn, incongruous armchair aren’t here. Harry can hear the humming of Mungo’s Stasis charms echoing somewhere in his mind, the quiet bustle of the hallway, the frantic whispering.  

The only person here is Draco. Draco, who barely ever comes over to Harry’s flat. Draco, who flirts with him over lunches but flinches away when Harry reaches out to sweep his blonde hair off his forehead.

There’s a rosy flush on Draco’s cheeks except Harry’s not the one that gave it to him. Harry’s never kissed Draco; they’re partners and friends and maybe something that transcends description, but not this. Not yet.

“Draco, why are you here?”

“What do you mean?” Draco’s smiling at him, eyes soft. It’s a daydream. Harry swallows down the grief of the realization. 

“We’re not dating, we’re not anything, why are you in my flat?”

Draco freezes. 

“No, no, no, please, no,” Harry’s grasping at him desperately but there’s nothing there. Just pixels floating away from each other, dissolving into the air. 

“NO!” Harry’s kneeling, face hidden in his hands. “No, I can’t do this alone, I can’t, come back… please come back.” He knows it’s impossible; you can’t teach humanity, Ron had said. AI doesn’t understand emotions, won’t bring him back now that it knows he doesn’t belong. 

“They want to Obliviate you,” Ron continues, speaking at Harry’s bedside at Mungo’s, imitated in Harry’s subconscious. 

“What?” Harry turns and scrambles toward Ron.    

“Hermione had a near conniption,” he chuckles. “But it’s the logical solution. The curse absorbs everything you show it and gives it back to you, better and smarter. If there’s no data for it to learn from, then you’re free.”

Harry collapses into the chair beside Ron, mind whirling. The room twists around them. They’re in the Gryffindor Common Room now, Ginny and Hermione near the fireplace, no more Walnut table and Cherry chairs. Except, Molly Weasley’s washing dishes in the corner. No. 

Obediently, Molly Weasley pops away. And then, the room is shifting again. 

“Without memories, the curse will implode into the simplest version of itself: a basic mind trap. Straightforward, simple. The kind that Aurors learn in training.” 

“JUST TELL ME WHAT TO DO, RON,” Harry bellows. 

The Burrow. Except, there are two Georges. No. The room glitches and restarts. 

“They won’t try Obliviation with Malfoy. Healers think it’s too late, that he’s too weak even to break out of the simplest version.”

The office and Draco… he’s back. He’s back and alive and leaning back in his chair, feet propped up on his desk, inspecting a takeout box. Yes. 

The room fills in further, encouraged. Case files pile up on Harry’s desk; Draco’s Statue of Liberty trinket is back, in the right place this time; an evidence board on the wall, newspaper clippings, Draco’s neat, white notes, Harry’s scrawl. 

“It’s unethical to deprive him of his memories now.” Ron says. 

Harry inspects the board closely. 7 people dead over 2 months. Inconsistencies in their deaths, but clearly perpetrated by the same actor. A pale blue envelope mailed to each victim. It explodes within minutes of delivery, enveloping its target into a coma.  

Seemingly random victims. A middle-aged mother, an elderly school teacher, a teenager days away from his 15th birthday. Muggles, Purebloods, Half-Bloods, and a Squib. Varying races, different financials. 

“Weird, isn’t it?” Draco’s staring at him. “Almost as if they chose the most diverse targets on purpose.”

Harry turns to him slowly, “Why?”

Draco tosses him an egg roll and shrugs, “Make sure we can’t trace them?” Draco joins him at the board, looks over the victim list.

The first had taken one month to die, slowly incapacitated. The second had taken only half that time, he had perished within two weeks. Faster and faster after that. The latest victim, a five-year old girl, was gone in three days. 

It was the first time, in five years of working together, that Harry saw Draco break down. Crouched outside her Mungo’s room, shivering, quiet; Harry had pulled him up and deposited him home. He came back to work two days later, his clenched jaw and fierce determination lodging itself into Harry’s heart.

Draco’s written a note under her picture: The curse is learning. 

“What is this?”

“You didn’t see the Mungo’s report? They think it’s targeting memories. With each iteration, it’s getting faster and killing quicker. Hermione was telling me about this thing…”

“Artificial Intelligence.”

“Exactly,” Draco smiles, surprised, “it absorbs huge amounts of data until it learns how to adapt to every condition.”

“The diverse victims— someone is teaching it how to learn, adapt to every condition,” Harry repeats. Draco’s standing near his desk again, illuminated by the soft light of his lamp. Soft blonde locks fall into his eyes as he looks over a case file. Harry wonders if this version will flinch away if he reaches out. Wonders if the curse has learned this detail yet. He hopes it hasn’t.

“They’re going to let him die in his own fake world. A peaceful death, they called it.” Ron is still sitting in the corner of the office, in a cushioned armchair.

Harry shakes his head, silently, frantically. There’s a pale blue envelope on Draco’s desk. 

“Draco, what is that?”

Draco looks at the envelope and back at Harry, nonchalant. Then, his face morphs into fear, mirroring Harry’s own expression. It’s the curse, it’s learning. Harry’s teaching it.

“The curse was targeting Malfoy. You were hit since you were in such close proximity, but it's a much weaker variant. You can make it out, Harry. You can help Malfoy navigate out.” Ron says from his corner.

“Harry,” Draco whispers. “What do I do?”

Harry strides forward, takes Draco’s shoulders in his hands. This is real now; Harry remembers this morning. “I’ll come for you, okay? We know what it is now, we’ll figure out how to stop it. Draco, you’ll be fine.”

Draco’s falling now. His eyes are shut, he’s laying on the floor, head tilted toward Harry.

Draco’s dying.

“RON, WHAT DO I DO? TELL ME WHAT TO DO!”

Ron’s not in his corner anymore. He’s gone, and so is his armchair, and it’s just Harry alone, in his office, with Draco’s body. 

The room is still filling up around him. Draco’s coffee mug, steaming on his desk. Blank walls slowly plastered over with Auror-standard tan wallpaper. Except. Except, Severus Snape is standing over Draco.

Harry steps closer cautiously, willful not to let the curse know that Snape doesn’t belong. 

“The headmaster has asked me to teach you Occlumency. I can only hope that you prove more adept at it than Potions,” Snape says, looking up at Harry with dark, hooded eyes. 

A memory, then. Out of place, but relevant. Harry remembers Ron’s words: The curse doesn’t know which memories are relevant. It’s guessing, responding to Harry’s needs. It’s helping. 

“Right. You’re right.” Harry says, loud. Snape solidifies, robes saturating darker. 

“Rid your mind of all emotion,” Snape continues. “Empty it, make it blank and calm.”

“Empty it,” Harry whispers. He takes a last look at Draco and closes his eyes. 

He opens them to a plain white room. Nothing on the walls, the floor. Nothing, except a door. A simple mind trap. Harry opens the door.

i just love the idea that the curse helps him get out. since AI is always developed in service to others, i like the idea that even weaponized as a curse, it would still adapt to the needs of its target and help them in any way possible. idk pals!!!! i just have a lot of thoughts about AI, come scream with me about it!!!!!!!

also, if you haven’t already, i would highly recommend reading the article this is based off-- it is fascinating.

[jungshookz]

kiss me at midnight; myg

➺ pairing; min yoongi x reader

➺ genre; ceo!y/n x secretary!yoongiverse!! sfw!! fluff!! the title says it all!! this is the moment we’ve all been waiting for!! 

➺ wordcount; 8.1k

➺ summary; y/n finally musters up enough courage to tell yoongi about her i-know-i’m-your-boss-but-i-have-non-boss-feelings-for-you feelings. 

➺ what to expect; “careful, secretary min… i might have to give you a raise if you keep sweet-talking me like that.”

                                      »»————-　♡　————-««

“let’s see… the decorators are coming at 2, the caterers are coming at 6:30, the DJ is coming at 7…” yoongi reads out loud as he goes down his checklist, “the bartender sent over the special drinks menu which i emailed to you this morning, and- ah, right, the caterers mentioned that they were able to switch the mini hot dogs to sliders instead-”

“oh, that’s great! mini hot dogs just don’t carry the same level of class as teeny little hamburgers…” you narrow your eyes slightly as you clasp your hands in front of your face, tapping your fingers against each other, “what about the chocolate lava cakes?”

“mhm, don’t worry, those are on the menu as well, as per your request,” yoongi pauses, “ah- the people bringing the photo-booths are coming to set them up at 5 - we’ve already cleared out the space for them, so that should be good to go… also, are we putting a limit on photos?”

“a limit?”

“yes, a limit,” yoongi looks up at you and shrugs, “there’s only so much film and it wouldn’t be fair for one person to take ten photos and for another person to not have any at all.”

you immediately scoff before dismissing yoongi with a flick of your wrist, “silly yoongi, you can’t put a limit on fun. just tell them we’re willing to pay for extra film and for one of their workers to hang out at the party and wait until the booths need refilling.”

“there.. is no limit… on fun…” yoongi mutters to himself as he continues to scribble notes down in his notebook, “and… that’s it!” he clicks his pen before tucking it back into his shirt pocket, “pretty much everything has been taken care of. if all goes well, this’ll be a fantastic new year’s eve party.”

“yay!” you throw your hands up into the air before leaning back against your chair with a giggle, “this is so exciting. i love throwing parties!”

“and i love planning parties...” yoongi hums absentmindedly, looking back down at his list, “so i guess we make a pretty good team...”

“teamwork makes the dream work, right?”

“mm.” 

a couple seconds of silence ticks by as you scour through your brain for a new topic of discussion

you could... talk about the weather? 

or maybe ask him what he did over the weekend?

ask him about what he did on christmas day?? 

“so…” you clear your throat, smoothing your skirt down before folding your arms on your desk and leaning forward slightly, “you bringin’ any... hot dates to the party tonight?” 

wow

that was... not an ideal topic of discussion 

also, way to sound like a creep! 

“me?” yoongi glances up at you and tilts his head slightly, “well, i’ll be with you.” he pauses, dark brows knitting together, “did you… want me to bring a date?” he shifts in his seat, “i’m sure i can arrange for someone to accompany me if that’s what you want.”

“no!” your eyes widen and you shake your head quickly, “i mean- no, i was just- you know, i just- usually you have a plus-one that you bring to parties and, like, i’m sure that you probably had other new year’s plans that didn’t involve being at the party your boss is throwing- i’m just saying that perhaps, if you were planning on actually bringing someone, i just wouldn’t want to be a cock-block-” 

you’re cut off (thankfully) when yoongi’s phone suddenly starts to buzz on your desk

he extends his arm and catches it right as it’s about to fall off (which, admittedly, shouldn’t have been as hot as it was, but yoongi could be sitting there doing nothing and you’d still find it attractive) 

he holds a finger up pardon himself and you nod before leaning back a little

“hello? …oh, perfect. yes, i can come and pick them up now…” yoongi trails off, sandwiching his phone in between his ear and his shoulder before pushing his sleeve up a little to check the time on his watch, “i can be there in… roughly half an hour? yes. alright. perfect. see you soon.”

he hangs up with a beep before looking back over at you, “sorry about that! your dress and heels are ready for pick-up. what were you saying before my phone went off?”

“hm?” you clear your throat, “oh! uh… nothing. i was just- you know, small talk. but you can go now if you want to- i mean, obviously you need to go and pick up my outfit for tonight so i’ll just let you go-”

“alright, perfect-” yoongi nods and gets up from his seat, “i shouldn’t take too long but if anything comes up, just call me-” 

“yep! you got it, homie-” you shoot finger guns at yoongi before quickly forcing your arms down and shoving both your hands in between your knees so that they won’t do anything like that again 

your face flushes bright red as soon as the door shuts behind yoongi and a quiet groan slips past your lips before you smack your forehead down on your desk 

jesus

that... was rough, to say the least! 

sure, you fumble over your words whenever you talk to yoongi on a regular basis, but it’s never usually this bad... 

what’s gotten into you today?!

maybe it’s just the pre-party jitters! 

“get it together, y/l/n.” you mutter to yourself, patting your cheeks lightly before pulling your laptop towards you and opening it up 

if there’s anyone who can get you get your shit together, it’s hoseok

Y/N Y/L/N (10:12AM): help me

you perk up when hoseok responds almost immediately, your laptop letting out a little ping! from his message

you have half a mind to scold him for not doing work and being on the company’s messaging system but you dO need to talk to him right now so 

Jung Hoseok (10:12AM): What did you do this time

Y/N Y/L/N (10:12AM): nothing!! idk what’s wrong with my mouth today i’ve never called anyone homie in my entire life 

Jung Hoseok (10:13AM): ?

Y/N Y/L/N (10:13AM): you had to be here to understand :-//

Jung Hoseok (10:13AM): Okay well

Jung Hoseok (10:13AM): I don’t know what I’m supposed to say now

Y/N Y/L/N (10:13AM): can you just come to my office because it’s too much to type out

Y/N Y/L/N (10:13AM): and bring me an iced coffee from the vending machine while you’re at it because yoongi left to pick my dress up

Jung Hoseok (10:14AM): Let me get this straight

Jung Hoseok (10:14AM): You want me to stop working and you want me to go to your office so we can gossip about Yoongi

Y/N Y/L/N (10:14AM): gossip sounds bad

Y/N Y/L/N (10:14AM): ‘discuss’ sounds more professional

Jung Hoseok (10:14AM): …

Jung Hoseok (10:15AM): See you in ten minutes lmao

                                     »»————-　♡　————-««

“you asked him if he was planning on bringing a date to the party?!” hoseok laughs, leaning back against the chair before folding his arms over his chest and shaking his head, “wow. what, are you going to help him plan his wedding too?”

“don’t say that!” you groan, rubbing your fingers against your temples in tight circles, “i was just trying to start a conversation… i don’t know...”

“start a conversation? about what? about encouraging yoongi to be with someone who isn’t you?” 

“keep up the attitude and i’ll reduce your lunch break from one hour and fifteen minutes to one hour and fourteen minutes.” you raise a brow in warning, hoseok gawking before wagging a finger at you 

“i’ll report you to HR for abuse of power!” he jokes, his smile faltering when he notices that you still have that mopey, kicked-in-the-gut look on your face, “okay, think about it this way: this party couldn’t have come at a better time, you know? because now you know exactly what you have to do!” 

“huh? oh, right.” you nod slowly, “yeah, of course i know what i have to do at tonight’s party.” you snort, pulling away from your desk and sitting up straight, “but... you know, just to make sure that you know what it is that i have to do, would you mind telling me what exactly we’re saying i have to do?”

“y/n. come on.” hoseok presses his lips together before leaning forward, “what do people usually do at new year’s eve parties?” he asks gently, in that infuriatingly condescending tone that people usually use when they’re talking to children

“people share their new year’s resolutions with each other?” you hum, thinking back to the new year’s eve party you were at last year where you ended up talking to a very friendly bartender about all the plans you had in mind for the new year 

hm

you can’t help but wonder how he’s doing 

“well, yeah, but not quite what i had in mind-” hoseok shakes his head, “what else do they do?”

“they... sing karaoke really loudly?” you frown before letting out a gasp, “oh no! i didn’t think of that! do you think it’s too late to rent a karaoke machi-”   

“wow, i really have to spoon-feed this to you-” hoseok slaps his hands against his thighs before letting out a huff, “a new year’s kiss, y/n. does that ring any bells?”

“oh, right! i forgot about that part,” you chuckle lightly, tilting your head back against the top of your chair to look up at the ceiling, “but what does that have to do with-” you pause, head snapping back down to look at hoseok with wide eyes, “oh, you’re saying that i should- with yoongi- hoseok, i can barely look at yoongi for five seconds without breaking eye contact-” 

“why not?! its new years! you have to have someone to smooch when it’s midnight. even i have someone to kiss!”

“wait, who are you kiss-” 

“and you know what the best part is?” hoseok grins, “you have an excuse to get super drunk tonight! and a drunk y/n is a slightly more confident y/n-”

“oh, i can’t- i can’t ask him, no.” you chuckle nervously, your hands suddenly feeling a little clammy at the thought of asking yoongi to kiss you, “because then he’s going to feel like he has to kiss me because i’m his boss, and the next thing you know, i’m being called up to HR-” 

“you’re overthinking this again, y/n,” hoseok sighs, “don’t forget the fact that i caught him checking you out at the halloween party. you have to admit that he’s slightly interested in you.”

“that’s different!” you argue, your brows furrowing, “i was dressed as a sexy friggin’ bunny, for god’s sake!”

“and tonight, you’ll be dressed as a sexy friggin’ boss! the only difference is that you won’t have a little cotton tail and two bunny ears-”

“i don’t know…”

hoseok rolls his eyes at your doubt and resists the urge to get up and slap you across the face to get you to come to your senses

you can’t expect anything to happen between you and yoongi if you’re not willing to do something about it in the first place

he can’t even list out how many times you guys have had similar conversations that always end in you chickening out and changing your mind

you were supposed to make a move at the halloween party but you ended up bailing on the plan at the last minute and hoseok had to listen to half an hour of you whining about it over the phone 

he adores you but sometimes he just wants to grab you and yell at you for being such a wimp when it comes to yoongi 

“okay, you know what? forget yoongi. i’ll be your new year’s kiss!” hoseok teases, leaning forward before wiggling his eyebrows enticingly, “maybe if people see me canoodling with the boss i’ll finally get the street cred i deserve-”

“you know, i don’t know if i’ve reached that level of desperation quite yet-”

“i’m a great kisser, so it’s your loss...” hoseok kisses his teeth, raising his hands in defense, “anyways, just try not to overthink it. take a deep breath, relax, and hopefully you won’t point any more lame finger guns at yoo-”

“-ooou’re fired!” you stand up and slam your fist down on the desk the moment yoongi steps into the room, hoseok jolting at the sudden announcement, “you are fired, my good sir! you heard me loud and clear!” 

yoongi’s eyes widen slightly and he presses his lips together before stepping aside and lowering his head  

“what the hell are yo-” hoseok glances over his shoulder and it dawns over him when he spots yoongi standing by the door, “oh! oh. uh, okay. yes... i am... devastated...” he clears his throat as he rises from the chair slowly, “please... give me a second chance? i... won’t do it again?” 

you blink, pulling down your blazer slightly before giving him a curt nod

“...okay, but this is your last chance. next time, you’re really fired.” you clear your throat, sitting back down before gesturing towards the door, “you may leave now, mr. jung.” 

yoongi nods in acknowledgement when hoseok walks past him and he waits a couple of seconds before speaking up 

“sorry. i didn’t realize you were busy because the door wasn’t closed all the way.” he smiles sheepishly, raising the garment bag in his hand, “i just wanted to put your dress in the closet for you.” 

“yes! go ahead.” you smile, gesturing towards the closet before sitting back down in your chair 

“by the way, i passed by that breakfast place on the way to the laundromat-” yoongi pauses, glancing over at you on his way to the closet, “you know, the place that makes those BLT bagels you like so much?” 

“ooh, with the spicy mayo and the avocado?”

“mhm-” yoongi smiles, shutting the closet door gently and turning to face you, “they do chocolate chip waffles now and i thought maybe that’d be something you’d be interested in for future breakfasts.” 

“oh, no way!” your eyes widen in excitement, “i’m very interested in chocolate chip waffles for future breakfasts!”

“that’s what i thought.” he chuckles, making his way back towards the doors, “anyway- i’ll be out there if you need me, boss.” 

“mhm!” 

you immediately get up from your chair as soon as yoongi leaves the room 

you told yourself that you were going to wait until tonight but you’ve been thinking about your dress all week and you wanna see it now!! 

“dress, dress, dress-” you murmur to yourself like a maniac, your heels clicking against the floor as you jog over to the closet 

you push down a squeal of excitement after unzipping the garment bag and getting a good look at your outfit for tonight

you spent hours searching for the perfect dress and it was totally worth it now that you’re looking at it  

it’s a navy blue midi-length dress that sort of cinches in at the waist but the skirt itself is relaxed so you don’t need to worry about your legs being constricted 

there’s also a high slit in the skirt which is exciting (you had to shave your legs yesterday which wasn’t as exciting) 

and it’s a long sleeve dress but the sleeves and sheer and billowy but cap around your wrists 

it’s classy but also a little sexy but not like your halloween playboy costume level of sexy

you’re still not sure what possessed you to dress up as a playboy bunny but even you have to admit that that little black dress looked great on you 

you zip the bag back up before pushing it aside to sneak a peek at the suit that yoongi will be wearing to the party 

he asked if he could keep his suit in your closet and obviously you said yes because it’s yoongi 

your eyes light up when you notice something peculiar about his outfit 

it’s navy blue as well!! 

the corners of your mouth lift in a wide grin, your heart skipping a beat at the thought of you and yoongi (unintentionally, but still) wearing matching colours tonight 

heh 

                                    »»————-　♡　————-««

“c’mon, stupid thing...” yoongi frowns to himself as he struggles to tie his tie

he’s been at it for the last ten minutes and it seems like his gummy worm fingers aren’t going to be useful anytime soon 

and it probably doesn’t help that he’s using his phone camera as a mirror instead of going to the bathroom to use the actual mirror

he doesn’t know if it showed this morning but he’s been a nervous wreck all day! 

he practically zipped out of your office as soon as he had the chance to and he just hopes that you’re not suspecting anything 

it’s just that as each day goes by, he gets more and more conflicted over what to do about his feelings for you 

this wasn’t supposed to happen!

when he first realized that you liked him, he was flattered and admittedly it was a nice stroke to his ego knowing that his boss was interested in him, but he didn’t know it’d turn into this 

he didn’t know he’d end up liking you back 

this is a disaster! 

he’s not supposed to like you back!

he already tried forcing himself to stop liking you but if anything it’s made things worse

he thought your schoolgirl crush was sweet at first and then one day he found your poor excuse of asking him to stay after hours to help you re-organize your pens was cute and ever since then it’s gone downhill 

like the other day when he was eating lunch with you - you took the paper sleeve that holds the chopsticks and you folded it into a makeshift chopstick rest and gave it to him to use and,,. he’d have to be crazy to not find that wildly endearing

yoongi lets out a huff and leans back against his chair as he looks at himself on his phone screen 

“good going, moron.” he grumbles to himself before lifting his hand and flipping himself off, “you and your feelings.”

of course, it’s not technically a... bad thing that he likes you back, right? 

...but what’s everyone going to think?

he knows that he’s on the list of people getting the christmas bonus (because he helped you type it out) but what if people think he just slept his way to the money?? 

oh, god

that’s not who he is!

this is too much to think about right now 

he just had this suit pressed and he’s not about to ruin it by nervously sweating in it 

he’s just going to enjoy this party with you and then deal with his feelings later!  

future yoongi can handle it

present yoongi is just going to enjoy the ride B-) 

“whatcha up to?” 

“-!” yoongi jumps and scrambles up from his seat when he hears your voice all of a sudden, “y/n! sorry, i didn’t hear you come out of... your... office...” he trails off, voice softening slightly as he takes in how beautiful you look in your dress 

obviously he already knew what you were going to wear because he was the one who picked up your outfit from the dry cleaner’s but... it’s a different experience actually seeing you in it 

beautiful 

there’s really no other way to describe it

you look... beautiful. 

“i don’t know why on earth you’re wearing a tie to a party.” you snort, eyes flicking down to the tie hanging loosely around his neck, “this isn’t a business meeting, yoongi.” (you decided it’d be best to take hoseok’s advice. no overthinking - just relaxing! and it seems to be going well...) 

“oh.” yoongi snaps himself out of his daze before shaking his head, “i… i don’t know why, either. i guess i’m just used to wearing a tie.”

“well, i say ditch it - you know, let loose a little! it’s new year’s eve, after all.” 

before yoongi even knows it, you’re stepping towards him and sliding the tie from his neck in one swift movement before tossing it onto his desk

ᵒ ᵍᵒᵈ

you even smell pretty 

he freezes when you reach up to undo a couple of buttons on his shirt, his hands gripping the edge of his desk so tightly that his knuckles are stark white 

“there we go!” you smile, fixing yoongi’s collar before nodding to yourself, “much better. also, do you think you can help me with my heels? i put them on already but the little buckles are flimsy and i can’t do them because of my nails.” you raise both your hands before wiggling your fingers 

“mhm, of course.” yoongi steps aside and gestures towards his chair, “take a seat and i’ll take care of them for you.”

yoongi’s chair squeaks slightly as you sit down on it and you make a mental note to get him a new one 

...maybe you should get everyone in the office new chairs to make your crush on yoongi less obvious

hm

lots to think about

“so, do you think anyone’s going to have fun tonight?” you ask quietly, leaning back against the chair, “i’m nervous.” 

“i’m sure everyone’s going to have fun, y/n,” yoongi lowers himself onto the ground so that he’s down on one knee before raising your leg so that your foot is pressed against his chest, “they get free food, free alcohol, and there are fun 2021 party hats and stupid 2021 glasses to match. what’s not to love?”

“me. i’m the part they don’t love.” you snort, propping your elbow up on yoongi’s desk before leaning against your fist, “i’m gonna take one step onto the rooftop and immediately ruin the party somehow. i bet the dj will stop playing music and his records will make that awkward scratchy sound.”

“don’t be so harsh on yourself…” yoongi scolds, tucking the thin strap into the buckle and giving it a little tug to make sure it’s nice and secure before lowering your foot gently, “besides, if anyone looks at you weirdly, i can just call security and have them escorted out of the party.” he tuts, smiling up at you as he lifts your other foot 

“ooh. careful, secretary min… i might have to give you a raise if you keep sweet-talking me like that.” you joke, pushing the ball of your foot gently against yoongi’s chest teasingly

“oh, yeah? i wouldn’t be opposed to that, boss…” the corner of yoongi’s mouth twitches in a side smirk as he slips the other strap into place, “alright, there we go! heels are nice and secure.”

he gets up from the ground, dusting his knee off before extending his hand to help you get up from his chair, “ready?” 

“as ready as i’ll ever be...” you reach for his hand only to pause, your nose scrunching slightly as you pull away, “i don’t know. let’s think this through. do we have to go to the party?”

“well, you are the host.” yoongi points out, “and i planned the whole thing! do you know how hard it was to arrange for a karaoke machine on new year’s eve?” he frowns playfully, “you can’t bail on me like this.” 

“i guess...” 

“listen- whenever you want to leave, just let me know and i’ll grab the entire plate of sliders, a crisp bottle of champagne, and then we’ll head back down here to eat, drink, and watch the fireworks from your office window.” yoongi tilts his head, his hand still out for you to take, “deal?” 

“...throw in the chocolate lava cakes as well and we have a deal.” 

                                   »»————-　♡　————-««

“wow! you really outdid yourself, yoongi.” you nod in approval as you look around, “look at this place!” 

you never even knew the rooftop had the ability to look like some trendy upscale bar that sells cocktails for $30 each 

“hey, if this secretary thing doesn’t work out, maybe i could become a party planner.” yoongi jokes, lifting his glass up with a smile

“you know, i really think you could.” you clink your glass against his before taking a sip of the bubbly champagne, “by the way, you don’t have to hang out with me all night. you’re allowed to go and mingle with your coworkers.” 

“i know.” yoongi hums before his nose scrunches slightly, “but every time i talk to them, they’re always gossiping about something and i think gossiping is unproductive.” 

“wha-” you gawk, your lashes fluttering, “you’re telling me that you’ve had access to juicy office gossip this whole time and not once have i ever heard any of it??”

“i mean...” 

“you have to tell me something. i’ll take anything!” 

you grin excitedly when yoongi gestures for you to come in closer 

“jungkook and tzuyu had sex on the photocopier by the supplies room.” he blurts out quickly, clearing his throat before taking a sip of his own champagne, “but you didn’t hear it from me!”

“they- what?!” you gasp in shock, jaw practically dropping to the floor, “they did?? during work??”

“no, it was after work!” yoongi shakes his head, “i think you had a meeting across town that night which is why we weren’t here... otherwise we... probably would’ve heard it but- it’s on the CCTV security cameras and everything. of course, since the photocopier is kind of out of frame, you can only see their lower halves-”

“well, then how do you know it was jungkook and tzuyu??” 

“their shoes! and jungkook’s socks. he’s the only one who wears bright purple rubber-duckie socks to work.” 

the two of you turn to look at jungkook across the rooftop and you blink before looking back over at yoongi with a pout 

“that’s my favourite photocopier.” you mutter, “i hope they didn’t get any... fluids inside of it-”

“gross! why would it be inside of the machine?!”

“i don’t know! people go crazy during sex sometimes!” you raise your hands in defense before clearing your throat quietly, “okay, but seriously, i feel like having vigorous sex on a piece of office equipment is definitely violating something so i might have to bring them in for a little chat-”

“ooh, can i be there when you scold them?” 

“absolutely-”  

“miss y/n?” you jump in surprise when someone taps your shoulder gently from behind

you glance over your shoulder to see joy before smiling politely, turning around fully to face her, “joy! what’s up?”

“i’d like to talk to you about something, if that’s alright - do you have a moment?” 

“oh! um, of course-” you pause, turning to hand yoongi your glass, “let’s head over there for some privacy. what’s on your mind?” 

“it’s just... you know, regarding past comments i may or may not have made about you-” she chuckles uneasily, “seeing as you still have to figure out who’s getting christmas bonuses this year, i thought that-” 

yoongi bites back a grin when you turn back to look at him with pleading eyes and he shrugs helplessly before raising his own glass at you and downing the rest of the champagne 

                                  »»————-　♡　————-««

yoongi’s never been a huge fan of parties mainly because he’d much rather enjoy a bottle of champagne and full-sized burgers in the comfort of his own home 

he really only started going to parties once you became CEO of the company and he wasn’t left with a choice because he was worried that you’d fire him if he didn’t attend any of these festive celebrations 

he likes to think that you’ve opened him up to new experiences, helping him become a better human being overall 

:-) 

“hey!” yoongi chokes on his tiny burger patty when someone gives his back a hearty slap, “i’ve been looking for you everywhere! i have a bone to pick with you, min yoongi.”

yoongi’s brows furrow in confusion when it’s hoseok that plops down on the bar stool next to him 

“what-” yoongi swallows his bite before giving his chest a couple of pats to help get the masticated chunks of meat down smoother, “what did i do??” 

hoseok opens his mouth to say something before pausing, eyes flickering to the side as he reconsiders what he’s about to say 

he’s a little tipsy thanks to the open bar so he didn’t really think this decision through but he’s here now so it’s a little late to back out 

you explicitly asked him not to meddle but he feels like if he doesn’t do anything, then you’ll never do anything and you’ll just go to the grave keeping your feelings for yoongi a secret 

does this count as meddling? 

he just has to find a way to steer the conversation towards the topic of you and yoongi and romance 

this might be meddling, now that he’s thinking about it

...

it’s fine! 

he’ll do it in such a subtle way that yoongi won’t even notice! 

“it’s not something that you’ve done. it’s something that you haven’t done.” hoseok clears his throat, narrowing his eyes at yoongi suspiciously, “do you like y/n? because she likes you.”

(not very subtle, but hoseok never likes to beat around the bush.) 

“woah-” yoongi’s eyes widen in surprise and he lets out a nervous chuckle before looking around, “ha, i- um- where did you get that idea from?” 

“you didn’t deny it.” hoseok grins in success, “so you do?” 

“i...” yoongi pokes his tongue against the inside of his cheek before he lets out a huff and his shoulders droop in defeat, “yeah. yeah, i do. ...but what does that have to do with you?” 

“oh, it has everything to do with me!” hoseok chirps, clapping his hands together excitedly, “i’m here to give you advice!” 

“yeah, okay,” yoongi immediately scoffs and rolls his eyes as he turns back to pick up his drink, “no offense, but i don’t think i should be getting advice from the guy who was almost fired today-”

“oh, please, i wasn’t getting fired when you walked in.” hoseok raises a brow, “we were talking about you before you barged in so y/n obviously panicked and changed the subject to make it look like she wasn’t going all goo-goo-ga-ga over you-” 

“what? you were- y/n was talking about me?” yoongi perks up, his interest in the conversation suddenly reigniting, “really?” 

“she’s always talking about you,” hoseok points out, “don’t get me wrong - i love going to her office to talk about you instead of doing my work, but it’s exhausting! which is part of the reason as to why i’m willing to give you advice to get this show on the road.” 

“i don’t need advice, though.” 

“of course you need advice. if one of you finally made a move, i wouldn’t need to give you advice, but here i am.” hoseok gestures to himself before shrugging, “so... what’s wrong with you?”

yoongi scoffs in offense

that’s a little ruDE

“what’s wrong with me?”

“yeah. why haven’t you made a move yet if you like y/n back?” hoseok emphasizes as a reminder that this crush goes two ways and that yoongi can be blamed for the lack of action just as much as you 

“because... i can’t! it’s not that easy, man.” yoongi shakes his head, “i can’t just ask her out. she’s... like... she’s miss y/n.” 

“yes. and the sky is blue.” hoseok frowns, “i’m sorry, what’s the problem?” 

“she’s the boss!” yoongi snaps, glaring over at hoseok, “she’s our boss!”

“exactly! she’s the boss! if you’re going to date someone in the office, it might as well be the person signing off everyone’s paycheques at the end of each month-” 

“but you can’t- the rules!”

“what rules??”

“there are no rules! that’s why i’m so confused! i’m used to rules! that’s how the world works in my head! what the hell am i supposed to do now? go rogue?! i’ve never gone rogue before!”

“oh, god, who do you think you are? some secret agent? all you’re doing is asking someone out-”

“i can’t date y/n-” 

“give me a legitimate reason as to why you can’t date y/n.”

“i’ll be penalized!” 

“who’s going to penalize you?!”

“the boss of our boss!” 

“please!” hoseok groans loudly, throwing his head back in frustration, “you don’t think he’s goofed around with any of his secretaries?”

“okay, but this isn’t me goofing around with y/n, this is me... being serious with y/n!” yoongi presses his lips together, unsure of what to say next, “yeah. i wanna be serious with y/n.” 

“i promise you that no one cares about relationships as long as work is handed in on time and bags of money are being made.” hoseok hums, gesturing for the bartender to fix up another drink for him 

having this conversation about you with yoongi is just as exhausting as having this conversation about yoongi with you 

...

he doesn’t know if that sentence made any sense but all this alcohol is making the words jumble up together 

“well, okay, but-” yoongi chuckles nervously, turning and setting his glass down on the bar countertop, “then we’d have to make a file with HR declaring the status of our relationship, and then we’d have to talk about whether or not we want to keep things private or let the whole office know- oh, god, and what if it doesn’t work out? what if we break up? it’d be embarrassing after having declared our love for each other in front of everyone! and favouritism! don’t even get me started on favouritism! people are going to bag on y/n if they find out that i’m on the list of people getting a bonus! ...but, in my defense, even if we weren’t together i would probably still be on that list because i’m hardworking-” 

“yoongi-” hoseok interrupts, slapping both his hands down on his shoulders before letting out a sigh, “do you like y/n?” 

“yes.” yoongi answers without missing a beat, “i like y/n. a lot.” 

“okay. then that’s all that matters, right?” 

yoongi opens his mouth to respond but he pauses

huh 

that... is a fair point... 

it shouldn’t matter what anyone else thinks about his relationship with you 

what is it about alcohol that makes some people so wise?

“do you know what kind of a person you’d be if you just repressed your feelings and pretended that they didn’t exist at all? a coward, that’s what you’d be. because y/n is a fantastic woman and you need to hurry up and make a damn move before she realises she’s wasting her time on you and moves on to someone else who isn’t afraid to show their true feelings for her.” hoseok shakes his head gently before pulling away from yoongi with a nonchalant shrug and a snort, “but, you know - i’m drunk as hell and i’ve had nothing to eat so all the things coming out of my mouth righ’now could be complete and utter bullshit!” he hiccups, giggling to himself, “who knows!”

“well… what do you suggest i do?”

“what else do you do at a new year’s eve party?” hoseok’s head flops to the side, the over consumption of nothing but champagne suddenly hitting him like a brick wall 

“…share new year’s resolutions?”

“wha- god, you guys are truly the perfect pair- no, dumbass, you kiiissss someone at midnight.” hoseok slurs, “you already know she’s into you. and now i know that you’re into her so she’s definitely not going to oppose giving you a big ol smooch!”

“well, it’s-” yoongi pulls his sleeve up to check his watch, anxiety bubbling in his stomach when he realizes there are exactly twelve minutes to midnight, “oh, god.” 

okay

that’s fine!

it’s fine, he can work with twelve minutes!

all he has to do is 1) find you, 2) start a casual conversation, 3) somehow transition the casual conversation into a not so casual conversation about his feelings for you, 4) transition from the not so casual conversation to asking if you’d like to be his new year’s kiss, 5)- 

“i can’t pull this off in twelve minutes. i don’t know how i’m going to do this!” yoongi swallows thickly, turning to look at hoseok (who’s starting to doze off), “how the hell am i going to do this??” 

hoseok picks himself up off the counter, turning to face yoongi before a wide smile spreads on his face and a little gasp of excitement slips past his lips, “hey! i’ve been looking for you everywhere. i have a bone to pick with you, min yoongi-” 

“okay, buddy-” yoongi quickly reaches out to keep hoseok from toppling over, “you’ve definitely had one too many-” 

                                  »»————-　♡　————-««

ding!

yoongi steps off the elevator with a huff, quickly checking the time on his watch for the millionth time tonight 

he spent two minutes running around the rooftop like a headless chicken in case you were still up there somewhere 

luckily jungkook told him that he saw you leave the rooftop and there’s really only one other place that you’d be 

he makes his way down the hallway towards the double doors of your office, smiling in success when he sees that one of the doors is slightly ajar 

bingo! 

maybe it’s because he’s now confident about his true feelings for you, but he feels like there’s a spring in his step right now! 

(it could also be because of the liquid courage, but that’s neither here nor there.)

he pushes the door open a little to stick his face in, giving himself a mental high five as he sees you leaning against your desk with a flute of champagne in your hand, staring out the window 

“hey!” yoongi clears his throat, knocking on the door gently, “there you are.”

“hm?” you turn to glance over your shoulder, “oh, yoongi! yeah, hey.” 

“i didn’t realize you’d disappeared... i would’ve brought the sliders with me if i knew you were in here.” he jokes, shutting the door behind him with a quiet click, “everything okay?”

“ah, well. maybe next time.” you smile stiffly, turning away from him to look back out, “yeah, everything’s fine. joy practically talked my ear off up there so i just felt like i needed to get away from the party for a little while.” 

“you know, the fireworks are starting soon...” yoongi points out as he makes his way over to you, “you’re probably going to get better pictures of them up there than down here in your office.” 

“yeah, i know… but it’s also going to be very loud up on the rooftop and i’d prefer to start the new year off with working eardrums.” your nose wrinkles as you let out a chuckle, “also, i…”

“what?”

“i… i don’t know, i just don’t really want to start the new year awkwardly standing in the middle while everyone else is getting new year’s kisses.” you reach up to scratch the back of your neck before chuckling awkwardly, “that… makes me sound like a very bitter single person and i swear it wasn’t supposed to come off that way-” 

“no, i totally get it.” yoongi shakes his head as he wipes his hands on the side of his pants, “as a matter of fact, i kind of wanted to talk to you about something-”

“hold on, hold on- before you say anything, i-” you interrupt him, turning to set your glass down, “i, um- i have something that i wanna say to you as well. can i go first?”

“oh! yes, okay….” yoongi cowers down a little, pressing his lips together tightly, “is... everything alright?”

“yeah!” you nod quickly before pausing, “i mean, sort of. kind of. i’m… not sure if it’s going to be a good idea or not, but i just want to let you know that if you… you know, if you feel uncomfortable or something after i tell you this, you’re free to pack up and leave, you know? i mean, i actually already have a letter of recommendation written for you so if you wanna go off and work for someone else, i’ve already put in a lot of good words for you-”

“woah, woah-” yoongi raises his hands before letting out a chuckle, “i- while i definitely appreciate the gesture, you know i’m… not planning on going anywhere, right?”

“yeah, well… things change!” you clear your throat, gaze averting as you reach up to scratch the back of your neck, “things... change. i… don’t mean to sound so elementary school about it, but i…” you trail off, the little voice in the back of your head reminding you that this is your last chance to back out and not tell yoongi about your feelings for him

you’ve chickened out more than a handful of times, so what’s going to different about this time around?

you look up at yoongi and he blinks twice before offering you a soft smile, “you…?”

oh 

how are you supposed to back out when he’s looking at you like that?

and maybe it’s just because he looks particularly handsome tonight in his suit or because you’re all riled up on cocktails, but...

“i like you.” you blurt out, trying your best not to cringe or make any faces, “like… in a… romantic? way?”

yoongi’s eyes widen and the smile fades from his face, though you don’t have much time to process whatever reaction that was before he’s speaking up 

“you like me.” yoongi repeats, swallowing thickly before nodding, “in a romantic way.”

“yeah.” you shrug, “and i have for a while, but i just never said or did anything about it because i thought it was inappropriate - you know, because i’m your boss and around the time i started liking you was when we held that seminar for workplace harassment and i didn’t want to make you feel like i was harassing you or creeping on you or anything - a-anyways, at first i thought i was attracted to you solely because you’re hot in that broody, college skater-boyfriend kind of way and i thought it’d go away on its own, but then the feelings never went away, and then i thought that maybe this was just a more serious schoolgirl-type crush that would take time to go away, but then a lot of time went by and it still didn’t go away, so… here we are now, at the end of the year, and i… still have a huge, huge crush on you-”

“-i like you too.” 

“okay, cool, but i’m not done talking about-” you pause, your eyes flickering upwards, “wait, what?” 

“i like you, y/n.” yoongi breathes out with a smile, his shoulders visibly relaxing, “actually, i’ve known for a long time that you liked me and at first i was just flattered and admittedly i was a little cocky about it but then i... actually started to like you one day and- well, i didn’t want to say anything because- woah-!”

yoongi yelps when suddenly a paperweight is hurled in his direction and nearly whacks him in the face, “what the f-”

“are you kidding me, yoongi?!” you snap, slapping your hands down as you glare at him across your desk, “are you kidding me?!” 

“okay, i-i-” yoongi stammers, “i wasn’t expecting this reaction so i’m not entirely sure how i’m supposed to-” 

“you knew that i liked you this entire time-” you groan, reaching up to pinch the bridge of your nose, “and you knew that you liked me this entire time... and you didn’t say or do anything about it?!”

“well, why didn’t you do anything about it first?” yoongi exasperates, “you- you’re just as much at fault here as i am!”

“because i-” you laugh lightly in disbelief, “because i thought that if i told you that i liked you, that you would feel pressured into saying that you liked me back because i’m your boss! how would i know if your feelings were genuine or if you were just playing along? of course i couldn’t tell you!” 

yoongi chews on the inside of his cheek anxiously as you let out a huff before stepping away from your desk and heading over to stand by the window again 

“i...” he trails off, bending down to pick up the paperweight before setting it down on your desk gently, “i’m sorry that you... struggled with that... but... i think the important thing is that i do like you, y/n. i genuinely like you, and i was an idiot for not saying anything earlier... i let my doubts get in the way and...” he sighs, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, “i’m not good at- i’m not good at dealing with this kind of stuff and usually i just brush it aside and hope the problem goes away but i see you almost every single day so i couldn’t just brush it aside-” 

“yeah, well-” 

both of you freeze up when you suddenly hear the countdown chanting echo from up on the rooftop and yoongi feels his heart plummet to his stomach when he realizes he didn’t even ask if you wanted to be his new year’s kiss 

shit 

shit!

“i’m just-” yoongi shakes his head furiously, “i get nervous when there are no rules and there certainly isn’t a handbook for what to do when you’re attracted to your boss-”

10!

you let out a scoff as you turn to face him, “-and you think there’s a handbook for what to do when you’re attracted to your secretary?!-” 

9!

“i was a total coward for not saying anything sooner and i wish i did! i wish i kissed you at the halloween party!”

8!

“you- you wanted to kiss me at the halloween party?” 

7!

“of course i did, dumbass!” the name slips out of yoongi’s mouth before he even realizes it and he smiles sheepishly when you give him a warning look, “...miss dumbass.”

6!

“anyways,” yoongi coughs, “i-if you’re still interested, i’d really like to kiss you tonight if that’s okay-” 

5!

“wait, did hoseok put you up to this?” you narrow your eyes in suspicion before pointing to yourself, “because he told me to ask you to kiss me tonight-”

“yeah, he put me up to this because we both know that you certainly weren’t going to make the first move-”

4!

“how dare you?” you scoff, crossing your arms stubbornly, “i could make the first move if i really wanted to-” 

3!

“what?! that’s bullsh- oh my god, can we agree now to kiss first and then argue about this later?!” yoongi snaps, eyes full of panic at the thought of not making it on time, “please??” 

2!

“fine, but-” 

1- HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

you don’t get a chance to say anything else before yoongi swoops in swiftly to lean in and kiss you, warm hands quickly reaching up to cup either sides of your face 

the sound of people cheering and fireworks going off in the sky is nothing compared to the erratic thumping of your heart and the high-pitched ringing in your ears 

oh, wow

your lashes flutter as you feel yourself relax, your fists uncurling against yoongi so that your hands rest on his chest

you can feel his rapid heartbeat through his shirt and that’s all the confirmation you need to know that yoongi really, truly likes you back 

yoongi’s hands leave your face so that he can reach down to grasp your hips and pull you towards him, only for his arms to snake around your waist a second later 

your hands slide up his chest before your arms wrap loosely around his neck, feeling as though nothing else matters except what’s happening right now 

you’ve dreamt about this moment for so long but it’s so much better than you could’ve possibly imagined it to be 

and you’re not sure if it’s the copious amount of champagne that you consumed tonight but you just feel so warm inside 

yoongi pulls away (far too soon for your liking), his eyes lidded and hazy as he smiles fondly down at you, “happy new year, boss.”

you can’t fight back the wide grin on your face when he leans down to nudge his nose against yours, both of your hearts undoubtedly beating in time   

“happy new year, secretary min.”

❄️christmas with cee 2020 masterlist ���

help me help you make your wishes come tru (aka send me a request)

why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here?

or perhaps you want something shorter to read?

[call-me-aesthetic]

If Twisted Wonderland was an American Public School; Part 2

Part 1 can be found here

School Staff

Dire Crowley:

- The principal with them LOUD footsteps that you can hear through the hallways, especially during a test

- Lowkey got a fatty, that dump truck be bouncing whenever he walks 😳

- Has his walkie-talkie in hand and turned on 24/7 to get ready to report on some kids

- If you hear keys jiggling, you know damn well he’s coming straight towards your ass for not being in class

- Wears a dress shirt and blazer that makes him look like a mess with coffee stained pants

Divus Crewel:

- The teacher that everyone thinks is hot, both students and the staff

- Looks hella young for his age but tells himself out loud that he’s old, which worries a lot of people

- Talks about his weekend during a lesson, the students don’t care enough to listen lmao

- Allows you to turn late work in, one of the many reasons why people love him

- Wears a polo shirt that isn’t buttoned up and them air tight khakis to show off that cake 🥵

Mozus Trein:

- The old ass teacher that hates kids but refuses to quit their job 😤

- Always sus of you no matter what you’re doing, even if it’s homework or a class project

- “Sorry I can’t accept this, you know it was supposed to be due yesterday.”

- Has the coldest room in the entire school since the AC is broken so he’ll remind you to brink a jacket

- Wears white T-shirts and a long ass cardigan with a tiny flip phone as an accessory, Karen looking ass

Ashton Vargas:

- Creepy gym teacher who hits on the popular kids, sorry about that people 🤢

- “You can’t participate because you have asthma? Well I’m gonna have to see your doctor’s note.”

- Would most definitely have a beer belly, like why don’t you run bitch?

- Probably has a crush on the principal, you always see them talk before and after school

- Wears hoodies or tank tops that are soaked in his sweat and baggy joggers

Sam:

- The chill substitute teacher who puts on a movie for y’all to watch 😌

- Doesn’t really give our work unless you start to get all noisy and rowdy with each other

- If he had other jobs like being a lunch lady, the food he serves would be garbage except for the square pizzas and chicken nuggets

- As the janitor tho, he’s either good at cleaning or the complete opposite, it really depends on his mood

- Wears jumpsuits based on which job he’s working, switches outfits pretty fast too

Ramshackle

Yuu:

- Both the school’s nurse and guidance counselor who doesn’t know what they’re doing or why they’re here in the first place

- Whenever you visit the office, they’re always on their lunch break or tells you that they’re busy

- “You have a bloody nose? Let me get you an ice pack for that.”

- Re-evaluates their career choices, literally got a degree to only sit around and do nothing all day 😭

- Wears clothes that make them look professional and a child at the same time

Grim:

- The class clown who tries to be funny 🤡

- Jokes around too much to the point where he doesn’t bother paying attention to class

- Asks for your notes and never giving it back to you unless you threaten to beat him up

- Cheats off of you during a test, doesn’t care if your answers are right or wrong, he just needs to put something down before the time runs out

- I’m not going to even bother writing what he’s gonna wear, he’s a literal cat my dudes

Rival School RSA

Chenya:

- Rich Boy that’s decked in designer’s clothes, makes you wonder if they’re fake or not

- Doesn’t really brag about it, just wears them because they comfy and looks good on him

- Despite him wears designer’s, he wears the “trash” brands for clout ig 🙄🤚

- Mans is out here walking around looking like an off brand version of 6ix9ine, sorry not sorry

- “Gucci flip flops, fuck it, hit your bitch in my socks. This a big watch, diamonds drippin off of the clock.”

Neige LeBlanche:

- Rich Girl, I swear there’s a difference between the other one just hear me out 😩

- The thing is that he actually brags about his expenses, either purposely or unintentionally but it really depends on who he’s talking to

- He probably has enough money to replace anything he broke, you know this since he gets the latest iPhone every year

- Watched movies like Mean Girls, Heathers, or Clueless and ultimately wanted to be like every character, you could definitely tell lol

- Wears “good” designers like Channel with a matching handbag and perfume

Thank you such much for your love and support! Especially @i-exist2spite-god, @leonakingscholarship, and @twstsimp for their funny suggestions I used in this.

I honestly didn’t expect the first one to blow up so quickly but if you want more similar to this, I might just rearrange that, ahaha.

[imonthinice]

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 7/?

Word Count: 3.5k

Author’s Note: Y/N - Your Name, A/N Any Name (your best friend’s name), (Name) - your ex’s name !genderneutral (Don’t use a DC character! Y/N hasn’t dated any other DC character!) :)

3.5k words, my god. And they’ve still only known each other for 4 days and we’re on part 7. I do not know how to finish this.

Lol, Enjoy!

Warnings: Swearing, Heated moments, There is French in this one, No beta bitch we die like Jason Todd

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

Falling asleep in Jason’s arms after that escapade the two of them pulled the night before was something magical to say the least. Of course, they only got like 5 hours of sleep before they had to wake up and get out, at risk of Y/N being caught in the building, although the thrill of it excited the both of them deeply, but that’s obvious. They liked breaking the rules already.

Riding back home seemed a lot less like a journey to her this time, she just wanted to spend more time with Jason, but he had work and she didn’t want to hang out at Wayne Enterprises. She’d probably go to the library today, she didn’t know exactly what she’d do today, but she always thought that was the most exciting thing ever. “I don’t know what I’m even going to do tomorrow,” one of her friends asked when she moved to Gotham, ‘How exciting!’ she answered.

That friend said the next day she ran through the streets of Metropolis with her arms outstretched like a kid, and she did it in Y/N’s honor. “I told you!” she said, “How exciting that sometimes you never know what you’re going to do tomorrow!”.

These thoughts swirled in her head as Jason drove her back home when, like clockwork, like it was out of a movie, he said,

“I have no idea what I’m even going to do today.”

She laughed, “I always say ‘How exciting!’ when someone says that to me.”

“Really?”

“One of my friends back home, when I gave her that advice, she then spent the next day running around the city with her arms outstretched in my honor, it was apparently one of the more fun things she’s ever done, so” she paused, “I really mean it. how exciting! The possibilities are endless, are they not?”

“Well, not really, I have work to do,” he frowned.

“So own it. Make the office your bitch. Take charge, take lead.”

“Why not?” he said in agreement.

“Why the fuck not.”

-------------------------------------------

Jason walked her to her door, “Won’t you be late?” she asked,

“Dad knows where I am, I don’t think I’ll have my ass handed to me.”

“You never know,” she laughed.

He laughed too and slightly pecked her lips. He wanted more, he was hungry for more out of that kiss, but work and life gets in the way of their relationship, and he really whined when he had to break away, but she laughed at it.

“Slow your roll Tiger, one day,” she mused.

“You say that like you don’t want more.”

“This isn’t about me,” she retorted, “So, shut up, respectfully.”

He laughed and kissed the back of her hand, “You have a thing for doing that, huh?” she joked.

“I literally don’t know how to answer that, I think I’m losing my touch with flirting,” he joked back.

“Okay, okay, you need to get going now.”

“Fine! You want to get rid of me so badly, I get it,” he joked and walked back to the car and she waved him off. She hated that time he left, a lot. She knew it was healthy to take a day’s break if they’ve been on 3 back-to-back dates, but that didn’t mean she liked it.

She opened her door and walked in, thinking A/N was asleep so she wouldn’t be barraged for her hair being a mess, but, boy oh boy, was this girl waiting for her to get home.

“What happened? Why’s your hair a mess? Oh my god, did you have sex?” she asked.

“No, but we kissed, will you take that as information while I shower or do you want all the details now?”

“You can shower, you can shower. I’m not that needy.”

“Yes you are,” Y/N joked and went to go shower.

And like she always did, she opened her phone and looked at the news before answering her friends,

Millionaire’s Son, Jason Todd's Girlfriend’s Name Revealed!

She laughed, cause it wasn’t her name. She didn’t think he was seeing anyone else, and they used her picture, so she knew they just fucked it. She forwarded the article to Jason with the caption ‘ Fuckin’ idiots’ .

She then answered Artemis, who asked Did you two kiss? Dick’s up my ass about it ‘cause he knows we’re friends.

I want to take that out of context so badly. She joked with Artemis.

I knew this man had a terrible name that would come to haunt me, but did ‘ya kiss?

Yeah we did. Get Dick out of your ass, though, that’s weird, you have a boyfriend and he has a girlfriend.

Shut up, you’re not funny.

I’m pretty funny.

You are but I’m not going to admit that, girl.

And one of her old friends had texted her, it was someone who Y/N had seen off and on the past few years, they were polite, but she didn’t exactly want to speak to her ex.

Hey.

(Name)? What do you want?

Saw you in the news with the rich boy, guess we’re over?

We have been over for like 5 months, my guy. 

Bitch.

Okay!

People from her hometown were noticing her in the articles and recognizing her. Some would think this is the coolest thing that someone they loved met a nice boy, the money a bonus, some would give her the reaction her ex did, but she knew she was days, hours, maybe minutes away from her parents finding out about her love affair with Jason.  

She shuddered at the thought, she loved her parents, a lot, but something told her that maybe they wouldn’t did Jason to be like she found him. She also knew she could be overthinking it entirely and they’d like the Criminal Psych Major that she knew all-too-well.

But overthinking was fun, apparently. And she couldn’t stop thinking the worst of so much.

------------------------------------------------

When she got changed and just threw on whatever the fuck she saw, she went out to go talk to A/N.

“Hey, nerd. I’m done,” Y/N said.

“Nerd? You’re the one dating the bookworm and  you’re in criminal psychology,” she joked.

“Ha, ha. So, how are things with your lover? Have you secured him yet or are you just doing your own thing still?”

“Still just doing our own thing, don’t really have the time to date while getting my degree and working.”

“I mean, if it works for you I can’t throw judgment.”

“What about Jason? How’re things with you two?”

“You ever seen the Wayne Enterprises Ballroom before?”

“In pictures, why- Don’t tell me he took you there you lucky bitch?!”

“Then I just wont tell you,” she laughed.

“The Ballroom? Oh my god, that’s crazy, he's really pulling out all the stops to make you smile, huh?”

“I would do the same if I had more to offer, but I have barely anything since I bought that place in the dance competition across the country,” she said.

Y/N had bought a place in this competition before she met Jason, and she was heading to it on Saturday, in two days, and she actually had practiced the routine during downtime between her and Jason. She hadn’t exactly told Jason about this, and Jason had asked why she looked strained and like her muscles hurt, but that just never seemed like something you share with your casual partner, to her. She never seemed like her casual competitions were worth anything. A/N had begged to differ since Y/N had met her.

A/N said that Y/N had talent, that she could go somewhere, Y/N saw it as an extra circular that didn’t affect her much. She wasn’t the type of brag, and all her trophies were back home with her parents, anyway.

“Have you told him about your,” insert A/N’s heavy sarcasm, “’Casual’  competitions, yet?”

Idk what the hell happened with that line ya love to see it

“I’ll send him a quick text about it, I guess,” she sighed and sent just a quick, Hey, can’t have a date on Saturday-Sunday, forgot to tell you but I’m going to Cali for a quick dance competition, lol. My bad, shoulda said something.

“Why are you like this, be proud of your accomplishments, dammnit!”

“It’s a casual competition!”

“And you’re talented! I’m this close to just showing him videos of you going at it,” she said, exasperated.

“He already knows, we danced in the Ballroom.”

“Oh my lord,” she laughed, “You’re an enigma, if I had your amount of trophies I wouldn’t be hiding it.”

“Im’ not hiding it! It just kind of never came up.”

And he texted back, Oh damn, are you at least going to kill it? You better, I want to show the live broadcast to my family and brag.

She laughed, “See!”, she exclaimed, showing A/N the texts, “He doesn’t care like you do, nerd.”

A/N laughed, “Sure he doesn’t. Do you want to go to lunch, by the way? I’m bored off of my ass.”

“Sure, why the fuck not.”

“Go get dressed then, and I’ll do the same.”

“Okay okay, meet up in 10?”

“Yes ma’am.”

And off they went.

---------------------------

Y/N texted back Jason for a quick minute before getting dressed, Of course I’m going to kill it, my notes aren’t a representation of my dancing skills.

Well, I hope you win something. And text me. But mainly win something.

Of course I’ll text you, Jay. It gets boring at competitions.

You should go to a Wayne Gala then, god damn, those fuckin bastards are the most boring events this side of America.

Well maybe you’ll invite me one day.

I’ll probably have to if you show up on National TV. The press will finally know your name.

I hope I’m not on National TV then. Fuck the press.

Fuck the press indeed.

Since Y/N didn’t feel the need or want to dress up, she didn’t. Quick shirt and jeans and she was out the door. Sometimes she would dress up for lunch dates with her friends, just because she was bored as fuck and dressing up was fun, but she just didn’t want to do it today. Combat boots, jeans and a shirt were enough most days. You don’t have to be a model just because the press knows your face, she thought, you don’t.

“Who’s driving?” A/N asked.

“I can if you want. I don’t mind,” Y/N said as they walked to the beat up car they loved so much. It was nothing compared to the Porsche she had been in the night before, but it was still running, and you don’t fix something that ain’t broke.

“Maybe your boyfriend will buy you a new car,” A/N joked.

“If anything, he’d buy me a new computer, since mine is getting mailed to me and you’re going to love hearing the sounds that bitch makes,” she retorted.

“Is it bad?”

“Terrible. My sister called it a screaming electronic goat once,” she laughed, “I hate that fucking thing. But if it ain’t broke-”

“Don’t fix it, I know.”

“Exactly.”

--------------------------------------------------

For some reason, they decided in the car to go to McDonald's, because hey, it’s not like Y/N is on a  dance diet or anything. She wasn’t, because she didn’t want to starve herself for the sake of winning a competition. That was even her thought process as she was younger and more vulnerable to her teachers, she always told them she’d never do that. Years later, she still stuck to that mindset.

They got out of the car and like fucking clockwork, the press was in her face.

“You! The girl with no name, Jason Todd’s girlfriend!”

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!” she whispered under her breath, “How do they always find me!”

“Tell us about yourself! Are you serious with Jason? How do you feel about his family? How-”

But then she had an idea,

“Quoi? Je parle pas l’Anglais? Qu’est-ce-que vous voulez?” she said, using her bilingual skills to her advantage.

“What? No I mean-”

“Pas de l’Anglais! Désolé mes amis!” and she ran off into the McDonald's with A/N.

“Did you just speak French to get them off your ass, you genius?”

“Spoke very broken French because I wasn’t thinking, but yeah, I did that.”

“I forget you’re multi-talented sometimes, you have a lot hidden under your belt and I try to treat you like a normal person but you’re far from it.”

“I appreciate you for trying, but I think with my new love affair, you aren’t going to get far with those attempts anymore, sorry,” she joked.

Jason texted her, Did you just speak French to avoid the press?

How do you know about that?

We were watching the news during a meeting and they said that you spoke French.

You got to do what you got to do to get by.

That is literally the most genius thing I’ve heard of anyone doing in so long. I think you’ve truly bamboozled them for a while and they might hop off of your back for a while.

You think so? ‘Cause I really hope that’s the case.

My siblings think it’s hilarious, and no one’s leaked that you are just joking with the press, so yeah, they might actually leave you alone.

Let’s fucking go. That is the news of the 21st century.

4 days of knowing each other and you’ve flipped off the press twice, outran them with me once, hid in the Wayne Enterprises Building with me and you’ve spoken French to bamboozle the press. That is impressive.

I feel like the press is going to hate me one day.

Probably. But they also hate most of us most days.

You should probably get back to work.

Yeah, talk to you soon.

She put her phone away and went to stand with A/N, who was waiting for their food.

“Talking to your lover?” she joked.

“When am I not doing that?”

“That’s valid.”

-----------------------------

Going on a lunch date with A/N made a little bit of the harassment just better. They both bonded over how they hated the press before her love affair with Jason, and how their opinions wouldn’t change much unless, knock on wood, one of them went missing. Y/N told her about all the cases where the press and the internet did so much to solve cases around the world, love or hate the press, they did do a lot for solving crime.

She also told A/N that Jason was related to Dr. Barry Allen and Clark Kent, two people the two of them knew well because of the news and the fact that A/N knew Y/N when she wanted to go into forensics and was reading Dr. Barry Allen’s work.

When her mother texted her.

Y/N? Is that you in the press running around with Jason Todd?

Yeah mum, why?

Are you two in a serious relationship?

No mum.

Then why are the vultures so obsessed with you, says your dad.

‘ Cause you two made a pretty girl and he’s high up in the world, I guess, I don’t know. I don’t really like the press.

I can tell. We’re not mad at you honey, but be careful. And your dad says when you two get serious he needs to take Jason fishing.

He doesn’t speak French, mum.

Dad says he’ll work on his English for you.

Well tell everyone I love them, mum.

She panicked a little bit, her parents were nice when they wanted to be, but they were strict, why wouldn’t they be. So this, while being a welcomed surprise. was still a little panicky.

“Your  parents find out?”

“Yeah, they seem chill with it though.”

“Bing in the press sucks when you’re trying to keep your love life out of your parents' eyes, huh?”

“You could say that again,” she joked.

“Being in the press sucks when you’re-”

“I didn’t mean literally!” they laughed.

--------------------------------

Back at Wayne Enterprises, Jason was betting bombarded by his colleges, friends and family about Y/N and how she was able to get around the press’ constant harassment without flaw. And also because Bruce had seen the two enter the building at around 12am the night before. So Jason was called into Bruce’s office that day.

“1, I know everyone is bombarding you, so you can hide out here, son, 2, you and Y/N didn’t have sex in your office right?”

“God no, dad. We just hid here because security is tight as fuck and unable to get past.”

“I saw you two kissing on the cams and heading into your office, Jay.”

“Okay, okay, but we didn't have sex and the intentions were there, dad!”

“Uh huh, pretty girl in your, my, car.”

“Dad, stop it,” he joked.

“Well, her little shenanigans with the press are very amusing, have you told her that?”

“I have.”

“She’s basically not afraid to tell them what we all think.”

“That’s what I said, dad.”

“Well, hold onto that one and don’t let her go.”

“Do you regret doing that with Talia?” Jason asked.

“God no, she’s insane. The son I got out of her antics is literally her spitting image, so if I need to be reminded of her I can just go talk to Damien for a couple minutes.”

“Dami’s a lot like you too, don’t act like his personality is just Talia, he acts like his dad in every aspect and you know that.”

“Lord help any woman or man that kid goes on to date, my god,” the two of them laughed. It was the small things with Bruce that made Jason happy to be a Wayne, even if he didn’t share the last name. Jason grew up on the streets and even before that, his mum and dad didn’t have a lot of money, so the amounts of money that Bruce could shower on him was a lot, but he was okay with just working for his money. And Bruce knew that.

He spent a lot of his workday in Bruce’s office, hiding from the rest of the office, and texting Will.

She knows about your kid.

Well, she’s a good kid. I’m glad you’re bragging about her, means I raised her right.

Shut up. I love that little girl and I’ve helped raise her, Will.

You’re used to my new name?

I changed your contact to Will when you changed your name, so I could remember that that’s your name now and not Roy. I’m hoping I remember it in person though. It would be awkward if I forgot my best friend’s name.

It would be funny to look back on, though.

Like how your relationship with Jade is funny now?

Never stick your dick in crazy.

I wish you would have listened to that sometimes, but then I remember Lian is amazing.

I’m a cliché of dumb choices, what can I say Jaybird.

----------------------

In Y/N’s house, she would always play loud and sad music when she had the chance, some people thought her mental state was fucked, which sometimes it was, but most of the time the sad music went harder than the happy tunes you would catch from the other side of the house.

But even if music was blasting the loudest it could ever be, somehow she would still find herself lost in her thoughts, whether it was new dance routines or a story she would scribble down in her dream journal. there was something about those little fits of artistic passion she would experience from time-to-time.

It’s hard to put into words how those moments reminded her of the simplier times before sh was thrust into stardom, but also how they reminded her of Jason, and untouched mind she longed to know further. She knew there was so much more to the boy she had gone on dates with.

She would end up ignoring her phone for most of the rest of that day, just because she wanted peace and quiet, when A/N’s lover came over and she had to turn the music up louder so she wouldn’t be disrupted by the obvious.

I just got off of work, how are you? How’s your day been? Jason had texted Y/N while she ws turning up the music.

Well, I just had to turn up my music because my roommate’s lover is over, but other than that I’ve been enjoying peace and quiet in my room, waiting for something to do.

Is texting me something to do?

Yes.

That’s sweet of you. Work was boring though so I hope you don’t expect a story.

I don’t, don’t worry. You don’t always need a story for something to do.

Well, I’m going home with my brothers and dad, and we’re probably going to play office chair racing because I’m a bad boy.

You’re a bad boy?

Was that not funny?

It was pretty funny, isn’t that dangerous though?

Yeah actually, my brother broke his leg playing it and another time my little sister broke her leg playing it.

It seems fun but like, damn, two people have gotten injured playing that game, y’know.

Well if I die it’ll be a fun story!

[kireimarkeu]

Day 1 ◑; l.mk

+repost!

summary; what its like to have mark lee as your college boyfriend for a whole month :3

5k words

+Day 1, Monday, 6:00 AM

You let out a whine when you hear the alarm ring from Mark's phone. You hit his chest repeatedly, eyes still closed, eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. 

"Switch it off~" you whine, cuddling closer to his chest, pulling his arm around you to cover your ears from the blaring sound. 

Mark opened his eyes but soon squinted at the bright light. He rubbed his eyes harshly, leaning up a little to turn off the noisy sound. 

He looked down at you, a lazy smile plastered on his lips. Quickly, Mark leaned down to press his lips against your forehead. 

"I'll go shower first, I’ll wake you up when I’m done, okay?" 

You didn't reply, instead, you turn around to continue sleeping, hugging the pillows this time. Mark couldn't help but laugh at how cute you were. Shaking his head, he removed the arm that you were holding and got up to get ready for the first day of the final year in college. 

Almost an hour later, you were seated down on the chair, facing the mirror as you applied make up on your face.  

Once Mark saw you place the mascara back in place, "done?"

You nodded at your boyfriend and grabbed your bag that was laying on the bed.  

"Let's go," you mouthed, reaching out to hold Mark's hand. 

You thanked god every day that college was only walking distance from your place. You didn't need to wake up too early and you won't be too late if you overslept. 

 +Day 2, Tuesday, 12:59 PM

You stared at your lecturer, your cheeks resting against your palm. You gave up on taking down notes– you had the whole lecture recorded anyways. 

Finally, after 2 hours of non-stop accounting, the lecturer dismissed the class. 

You fished out your phone after packing all your things quickly. 

You: babe

You: are you done?

Usually, your boyfriend would reply to you instantly, but this time, he was taking some time. You pouted a little but continued to leave class. 

Once you walked through the door, you saw Mark leaning against the locker, waiting for you. When he finally saw you, a grin spread across his lips. 

"Mark!" you squealed, running up to your cute boyfriend, wrapping your arms around his torso, mark squeezed you against his chest.

"Hi, babe," he leaned down to press his lips on your cold cheeks. Mark reached to grab your hand in his, he was surprised at how cold your hand were. "Your hands are so cold!" he gasped, his hands rubbing over yours to warm yours up.

"I just got out of an air-conditioned room, dummy," you giggled. You tugged at his hand, "Lets goooo~" you whined, "I’m hungry."

Mark and you met a little more than a year ago through mutual friends. The first time both of you met, you barely noticed Mark. He was so quiet. Too quiet. 

But Mark noticed you ever since you walked through the cafe's door. He was usually a noisy guy– someone who enjoyed laughing and smiling at everything. But once he saw you, he didn't want to embarrass himself and opted to be silent the whole night.

You were so pretty. So kind, and so carefree. He liked you. The next day, he forced Jaehyun to give him your number. 

Ever since then, both of you instantly clicked and he finally asked you to be his girlfriend– something he's so thankful for. He wouldn't know what he would be doing without you. 

Ever since, 5 months ago, Mark has never failed to always meet you before lunch. It wasn't always, though. The both of you were taking different courses, hence both your timetable are different. But there were times where both of you would have lunch at the same time.

Luckily, this year, both of you have 3 lunch breaks together out of 5 days.

"What do you feel like eating?" Mark asks you, scanning the noisy room. 

It was 1 PM, so there weren't so many people in the canteen. It was usually only at noon then, both of you would have trouble trying to find seats.

You hummed, "Chinese?" 

 +Day 3, Wednesday, 5:08 PM

A grin formed on your lips when you saw Mark waiting for you after your last class. 

Running up to him, “Hiiiii~ Mark,” you giggled. 

Mark simply chuckled at you, his hands going up to your hair to pat your head softly.

“Did you wait long?” you asked as the both of you started walking home. 

He shook his head no. “Ah right!” Mark exclaimed as you looked at him with raised eyebrows. He suddenly pulled a black hair tie from his wrist, “you forgot to take this from me after lunch,” he told you, passing you your hair tie.

“Oh,” you grabbed your hair tie from him, thanking him by pressing your lips on his cheek. 

 +Day 4, Thursday, 8:34 AM

"Mark, I swear to god, it's only 4 days in–" you stop in your tracks to shut the door before turning around to face your boyfriend, "and I’m late." 

It was that day. The day where Mark started class late that day but you started at 8 but ended when his class started. 

Mark would occasionally wake up early just to send you to class. It was the least he could do for his favourite person.

Mark chuckled at how you were struggling to carry your bag. He reached out to grab your bag from you, and swing it over his shoulders as you mumbled out an incoherent 'thank you'.

"Well, thank god, you have me," Mark joked, as he started walking, you following soon after. You laughed at his words, but soon choked on the bread you were munching on. Mark patted your back, "Jeez, eat slowly, girl." 

You let out a loud cough then cleared your throat. "Fourth day in, and I almost died."

+Day 7, Friday, 3:07 PM 

“IT’S FRIDAY, BABY!” you yelled out with all your might, eyes closed, both arms stretched out.

Mark laughed at you but quickly covered your mouth with his hand, still giggling at you. “Stop! You’re embarrassing the both of us!” he laughed, grabbing your hand to drag you from the annoyed stares people were giving you. 

+Day 6, Saturday, 10:05 AM

You woke up at 10 am, no blaring sounds of the alarm clock. A small satisfied small formed on your lips. You turned in Mark's arms, hand going up to his warm cheek. 

"Markkk~" you murmured. "wake up..." 

Your boyfriend let out a soft whine, shifting with you in his arms. A huff left your lips when he squeezed you tighter in his arms and pulled you upon his chest. 

"Ah, Mark! Come on, wake upppp you poopoo head~" you squeezed his cheek softly. "We can't waste the day!!"

Mark whined and pulled away from you, turning away from you to lie on the other side, facing the window. You huffed, getting up to a sitting position, squeezing mark’s squishy arm, tugging on it multiple times. 

“Baaabe~ 5 more minutes, okay?” the cute boy mumbled into his pillow, pulling his arm away from your hold. 

You squint your eyes at your boyfriend. Letting out a long exhale, you got out of bed to make breakfast for the both of you. “I’m making breakfast so meet me in the kitchen in 15, okay?” you told mark, who simply hummed at your words. 

Honestly, you weren’t a very good cook, but for the sake of survival, you could make a simple toast and eggs. You quickly made toast and cook the eggs, then filling the table with Nutella, butter and strawberry jam. 

20 minutes later, Mark came in the kitchen with tousled hair, round gold glasses perched on his nose, eyes barely open and his pants hanging low on his hips. 

“Hi,” he mumbled, yawning quickly after.

Your right hand was holding a plate filled with toasts, while your left was holding a plate of scrambled eggs. You look up at your boyfriend, smiling at him, you quickly pressed your lips to his jaw before going to the small table to place your food. 

“Come, Mark! Breakfast’s ready.”

+Day 7, Sunday, 9:58 PM

Mark and you could be different at times. Mark was the hardworking type. He would finish whatever homework his lecturer gave, he would go through his notes that he had written down during lecture and would usually spend his Sunday studying. 

Meanwhile, you preferred not to do any homework because you think it was the biggest waste of time. It’s one day before the weekday, why would you study when you will be studying the following day anyway?

“Hey, Mark?” you called from the couch you were sitting on. 

Mark hummed, however, his eyes were glued onto his messy notes. 

“Will you follow me go get ice cream?” you asked your boyfriend, a glint of hope in your eyes because you could predict his answer whenever you ask a simple question. 

“I’m busy, sweet,” you mouthed the exact time when he said those words. You rolled your eyes. 

“But, Mark, I’m seriously craving for ice cream right now,” you whined with a pout. 

When he didn’t reply, you got down from the couch to sit next to the boy, wrapping your arms around his torso and resting your cheek on his shoulder. 

“Please, Mark~~”

The reason you were so clingy was because Mark didn’t spare you a glance the whole day, which upsets you a little because you forgot how he was like every Sunday.

“we’ll go after I’m done with this, okay baby?” he whispered, pressing his lips near your ear, still not looking at you. 

Let’s just say you’re not getting your ice cream today.

+Day 8, Monday, 7:15 AM 

“I am going to fucking kill myself,” you mumbled to yourself as you put on mascara. 

Mark could only chuckle at you from the bed. 

+Day 9, Tuesday, 7:04 PM

Mark and you were lying on your shared bed, holding hands in the middle of the bed as Mark talked about his day.  You laughed when he told a funny story that happened in class earlier

It was moments like this where you realise you loved Mark the most. Simply talking about things that happened throughout the day. 

“What happened today, babe?” Mark asked after he finished telling you everything he wanted to tell you. 

“Well, we have a project to do,” you sighed, “something I forgot we had in college,” you said sarcastically with a roll of your eyes.

“Group project?” 

“Mhm,” you hummed, “I’m partnered with Jaemin. It’s a duo project.”

“I see.” 

Silence suddenly filled the air. Comfortable silence. Both of you appreciating each other’s presence. 

“Do you wanna know something?” he asked you, turning his head to look at you. 

“What?”

“A girl confessed to me today.”

Your heartbeat started to pick up. 

“Who?” you asked.

You had thoughts that Mark would leave you for someone else before. Maybe not Mark, but you leaving him for someone else and that scared you a lot. You loved Mark with your whole heart and you have never thought of him being with someone that isn’t you. 

“You don’t know her,” he mumbled, “she’s from my class.”

You felt him squeeze your hand.

You pursed your lips, “What did she say?”

“She told me she liked me.”

You pulled your hand away from your boyfriend’s hold and turned to face him, “And what did you tell her?”

“I had a girlfriend and I wasn’t interested,” he explained with wide eyes. 

+Day 10, Wednesday, 3:38 PM 

You: hi b

You: I’m coming back late tody! 

You: don’t wait for me 

Mark Pee: okok

Mark Pee: where are you going?

You: jaemin’s place ): for project

Mark Pee: okk

Mark Pee: do you want me to fetch you from his place?

You: yes, please! 

You: I’ll text you when I’m done! Love u

+Day 11, Thursday, 11:02 AM 

“Ah, fuck!” you cursed, biting your lips in annoyance. You turned to look at your boyfriend, “Mark, I’m not getting lunch today.” 

He raised his eyebrows in confusion at you. The both of you were already queuing up for food, and now you’re not eating?

“I forgot to bring my money today,” you explained with a pout.

When you got home from Jaemin’s place yesterday, you immediately passed out after taking a cold shower. You forgot to grab some cash from your piggy bank today, where you usually kept some cash.

Mark quickly fished out his wallet and pulled out a 5 dollar bill and handed it to you. 

You pushed his hand away, “Mark, it’s fine.”

He shook his head, “its fine, you’re hungry, right?”

You tip-toed to press your lips against his cheek, “I owe you frozen yoghurt after school.”

+Day 12, Friday, 2:34 PM

Marker: where r u?

You: oh shit I forgot to tell you

You: I’m with jae again!! 

You: for the project

Marker: oh 

Marker: why didn’t you tell me earlier haha

You: sorry ):

You: were you waiting for me?

Marker: yeah haha but it’s okay, I’m going home now

You: oh, sorry Markie ): I’ll come back early to make it up to you okay?

Marker: I’ll wait for you (: 

+Day 13, Saturday, 11:18 AM

Mark continued to ignore you, despite the way you were hanging around him, trying to hold his hand to stop him from moving around, but it didn’t work. 

Yesterday when you had come home really late, despite the promise you made with Mark. When Jaemin and you finished the project yesterday, Jaemin had asked you to stay a little longer at his place to Mario Kart. Forgetting that you had promise Mark just a few hours ago, you stayed at his place until almost midnight and never told Mark. 

He was furious when you came back home. 

Once you walked through the door with a grin on your face, Mark quickly lashed out at you. 

“What happened to coming home early, y/n?” Mark asked angrily, hands crossed against his chest.

Mark only called you by your name when he was being completely serious. 

“It’s almost midnight and you’re only coming back home now?” he questioned you again with his hands placed on his hips this time. You could only keep quiet and keep your head down. “Do you know how dangerous it is for a girl to go home alone at this timing?”

You bit your lips, looking down at your feet, “I didn’t walk home alone… Jaemin sent me…”

Mark could feel his heart shatter when you spoke his name. It hurt him.

“Right,” he mumbled, turning around to go back to bed. 

You followed your boyfriend to your shared room, putting your bag on the chair, quickly changing to his clothes then slipping next to Mark who had his back face you. 

You wrapped your arms around his waist, pressing your front against his back. “Mark.” You kissed his bare shoulder, “Are you mad?”

You let out a sigh when he ignored you, “I love you.” You whispered, pressing a long kiss on his shoulder then another on his neck. “I really do.”

When you woke up this morning, you were shocked to see your boyfriend giving you the silent treatment. 

You sent him a pout when he sat down on the couch without uttering a single word. You waddled up to your boyfriend, quickly sitting on what’s yours— his lap. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you brought your face closer to his, noticing his flushed cheeks.

“Are you still angry at me?” you asked him, you leaned closer, nose touching, “hm?” this time you quickly pressed your lips on his, “are you?”

Mark parted his lips, hands going up to hold your hips, “don’t tease.”

+Day 14, Sunday, 8:07 AM

“Who’s that?” Mark groan at the non-stop vibrations of your phone. 

You turned around in Mark’s arms, grabbing your phone to see who was texting you this morning. 

“It’s Jaemin,” you replied, voice still hoarse. “He wants to meet me to finish up the project.”

“No,” Mark immediately replied, pulling you back into his chest, chin resting on the top of your head. “You can meet him tomorrow, I wanna spend time with my baby.”

You closed your eyes as you smile against Mark’s chest, “I like that.”

+Day 15, Monday, 7.39 AM

“Babe!” Mark whispered harshly, shaking you by your arm, “wake up!”

You turned around, pushing his hand away, “I don’t have class today.”

Mark raised his eyebrows, confused, “you don’t?”

You shook your head, opening your eyes a little, hands going up to hold Mark’s cheeks against your hand, “I don’t. My lecturer cancelled class today.”

He sent you a sweet smile, “Okay. Go back to sleep, babe.”

Mark leaned down to kiss your head quickly before standing up to leave, but you reached out to hold his wrist, stopping him from leaving you. 

“What time do you end class today?” 

“4 pm.” 

***

When Mark walked down the steps, he was surprised to see you waiting for him outside of school, sitting on the bench with a pout on your lips, waiting for your boyfriend. 

Mark speed up his pace to go to you.

“Babe!” he called, “what are you doing here?” a huge grin plastered on his face. 

“You’re always waiting for me, so I decided to do the same!” you told your boyfriend. 

Mark cooed at you, placing his water bottle under his armpits as he reached out to squish your cheeks between his fingers, “you’re so cute y/n.”

You let out a whine, pulling away from his harsh grip, “let’s go.”

Before you could walk away, Mark holds you back by gripping your hand. You raised your eyebrows at your boyfriend.

“I’m craving for ice cream,” he told you cheekily.

+Day 16, Tuesday, 4:35 PM

You dip your spoon into the mango flavoured ice-cream, bringing it into your mouth, savouring the sweet taste. 

“Mark, it’s your third time we’ve eaten ice cream after class this week. Are you not tired of it?” you asked the boy who was sitting opposite of you. 

“Nope,” he shook his head with a small smile as he looked up at you, “never with my favourite girl.”

Blushing, you scoop some ice cream into your spoon and forcefully pushed it between Mark’s lips as his eyes glistened with happiness.

+Day 17, Wednesday, 11:18 AM

Mark had his laptop perched on his lap, his round glasses sitting on his nose while his eyes were trained on the computer. 

Meanwhile, you were sitting on the floor, laptop on your right while papers filled the coffee table. Your hair was tied into a messy bun—a very ugly messy bun. You scratched your hair in frustration and let out a long exhausted sigh. 

Mark had his eyes on you for a while now, he noticed how frustrated you were. And there were times where things like this happen—where you get too stressed over school and would overthink. 

“You okay there, babe?” Mark asked quietly, leaning a little towards you. He hesitated on placing his hand on your shoulder—he opted not to. 

You turn around to look at your boyfriend, tears brimming your eyes, nose rosy. You quickly shook your head no. 

“Oh, honey.”

Mark quickly put his laptop away and took a seat next to you, immediately pulling you into his arms. Once you snuggled against his neck, tears started pouring out of your eyes. Mark wasn’t very good at comforting and you knew that.

He simply patted your back softly, placing soft kisses on your hair repeatedly. 

Once you pulled away from his neck with a sniffle, Mark smiled at you, “better?”

You nodded, rubbing your nose, you looked up at him with a teary gaze, “can you help me with this?” 

Despite both of you learning different things in school, that didn’t stop both of you from helping each other.

“Of course, angel.”

And Mark explained to you what you didn’t understand. It took you some time to understand him, but Mark was always patient with you. 

Once you finally got it, he pressed a kiss on your temple, “you’re so smart, babe.”

+Day 18, Thursday, 4:34 PM

You waited for Mark outside of school, excited to tell him about how well you did for your presentation earlier. But Mark hasn’t come out after an hour.

The both of you were supposed to end at the same time today, but why isn’t he coming?

You fished out your phone to send your boyfriend a text, 

You: helo where are you ):

You: im waiting for you outside 

Unfortunately for you, he didn’t reply. To make things worse, it started raining heavily from where you were. Luckily you were waiting for him under a shelter.

With a sigh, you decided to scroll through Instagram while waiting for your boyfriend. Your eyes widened in curiosity when you noticed Mark had posted something on his Insta Story. Curious, you clicked on his profile to see a video of a girl sitting in front of him in a café. 

You were pissed. Mark could’ve told you that he would be out with someone else that day—but he didn’t. 

You thought of replying to his story but you didn’t, wanting to be the mature one in the relationship. 

Just as you were about to leave, you heard someone call your name. Turning around, your eyes widened and a smile appeared on your lips when you noticed Jaemin running towards you. 

“What are you doing here?” Jaemin asked you, “do you have an umbrella?”

You shook your head while jutting your lips out.

“Come. I’ll send you home,” he told you with a sweet smile. You opened your mouth, ready to reject his offer, but before you could, Jaemin had already held your hand, pulling you under the umbrella with him.

On the way home, Jaemin and you couldn’t stop laughing at each other’s jokes. The both of you were so bright on a gloomy day. Jaemin suggested the both of you stayed indoors for a while, which you agreed to. 

Both of you stayed in a café that Jaemin had suggested. Both of you spent hours in the café laughing at jokes and trying different cakes. 

When you reached home with Jaemin, you were ready to put your key in the hole, the door was opened by Mark. An angry Mark. 

“What are you doing here?” Mark asked Jaemin with a sharp glare, pulling you towards his side. 

“Ah, Mark, Jaemin sent me home because it was raining,” you explained, looking up at Mark.

Mark turned to you angrily, “why didn’t you—”

“Anyways, Jaemin, thank you for sending me home. I owe you one,” you quickly hugged Jaemin. 

Jaemin chuckled, “anything for you, y/n.”

+Day 19, Friday, 12:48 PM

“Are you really going to fucking act this way?” you asked Mark angrily, hands placed on your hips. 

Mark rolled his eyes as he walked away from you, “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You followed him, annoyed at how he was avoiding you, “stop walking around when I’m talking to you!” 

He stopped in his tracks and faced you, frustration spread all across his face. 

“Why are you acting this way, Mark?” you asked him again, “you act like this every time I hang out with Jaemin.”

Mark took a deep breath, looking at anything but you, “maybe I don’t like you hanging out with Jaemin.”

You scoffed at your boyfriend’s words, “you know, yesterday wouldn’t have happened if you told me you were going out with someone.”

He kept quiet this time, he wasn’t sure what to say. Mark looked at you before walking away from you again. 

“Fine! Just leave like at times like this! Just like you always do!” you yelled out at him, “so childish,” you mumbled under your breath. 

+Day 20, Saturday, 8:56 PM

“Fucking Mark Lee,” you cursed, “always being childish over something small,” you rambled on, throwing the pan in the sink loudly, “why is he even my fucking boyfriend? Why did I even accept him?”

When you woke up today, Mark was gone. You didn’t think much about it, but when Mark wasn’t home after 3 pm, you started getting annoyed. You woke up at 8 am today, meaning he had left even before you had woken up. 

The moment you checked his Insta Story, he had left to hang out with the same girl 2 days ago. 

“Did he think I would get jealous over that dumb girl?” you scoffed, scrubbing the dishes roughly, “he thought wrong.”

At first, you didn’t think much about it, but after a few hours, you started stalking the girl’s account and constantly checked if Mark had uploaded anything on his Insta Story. 

“I hate Mark. He’s so good at making me feel like shit.”

Just as you said that, you heard the front door slam. You took a deep breath before approaching Mark. 

You went up to him, stopping him with your small figure, “Where were you?” you asked. 

“What are you? My mom?” he rolled his eyes. “I was with someone.”

Mark walked past you but you stopped him again as he let out an annoyed sigh. 

“Who?”

He turned around in exasperation, “Naeun.”

You crossed your arms, “since when did you both get close, huh?” you asked. 

“Since she told me she liked me.”

+Day 21, Sunday, 10:09 PM

Today, Mark didn’t go out. You didn’t either. 

You couldn’t stop thinking about what Mark had said yesterday. So mark went out with someone who had feelings for him.

Does she know Mark has a girlfriend? Will Mark like her back? Will Mark leave you? Has Mark fallen out of love?

You broke out of a daze when you felt something nudge your hand. You looked up at Mark who was looking down at you. 

“Huh?” you asked, stunned. 

He nodded his chin towards the bowl he was holding, “Eat,” he told you. You raised your eyebrows at him. He looked away, clearing his throat, “you haven’t eaten anything the whole day.”

You looked down at the bowl. Mark had made fried rice with a messy egg laid on top. A small smile spread across your lips.

He still cares. 

You gripped the bowl in your hand, “thank you.”

+Day 22, Monday, 7:37 PM

“Hey,” Mark nudged your shoulder, “do you want anything?” 

“What are you getting?” you asked, however, your eyes were fixed on your laptop as your lips bit on the string of your—Mark’s hoodie. 

“Western.”

You frown, shaking your head, “No, I’m good.”

“Kay.” 

*** 

The smell of fish & chips hit your nose, as you immediately looked up to see where the smell was coming from. Your eyes landed on Mark who had his plate of food sited on his lap. 

You lick your lips at the sight and smell of the delicious food. Mark squint his eyes mischievously at you. 

“Mark,” you called, “can I have some?” you asked, looking up at your boyfriend with a glint of hope in your eyes. 

Your boyfriend didn’t hesitate to cut up a piece and dip it in the sauce and feed you. You looked up at your boyfriend with a cute smile while munching on the delicious food as you went back to focus on your work. 

20 minutes later, instead of Mark eating, he was feeding you instead. 

“I thought you didn’t want any,” Mark grumbled while placing the fork between your lips. 

You looked up at Mark playfully, sending him a cheeky smile, “it’s really good.”

“Really?” Mark feigned confusion, “I never tried it,” he said plainly with a straight face. 

You pursed your lips and grabbed the cutleries from his hold, cutting a piece of the fish and bringing up to his lips. Mark's hands went up to your wrist to help you feed him as he ate with gusto. 

“Good?”

+Day 23, Tuesday, 5:17 PM

“Babe, I’m gonna meet Naeun, are you going to be okay?” Mark asked you, taking off his top, searching for a clean shirt. 

You bit your lip. Naeun was the reason both of you had a big fight the other day. Why is Mark still going out with her? Furthermore, she had a crush on your boyfriend, you were afraid if she would steal your man away from you. 

Mark jumped on the bed as he leaned towards you, “you okay?”

You looked down at him and sent him a fake smile. “I’m fine. What time are you coming back?” you asked softly, looking at away from Mark and directing your attention to your phone.

Mark suddenly grabbed your hands, pressing a kiss against it, as you looked at him in shock. “Baby,” he said, “if you don’t like me hanging out with Naeun, you can tell me,” he told you. 

You kept quiet. 

“Do you like me going out with Naeun?” he asked once more. 

Both of you have never gotten jealous before, and you didn’t want to break that. 

You shook your head, “you can go out with her,” you told him with a nod, your attention going back to your phone. 

Whatever you said was the opposite of what you were feeling. You didn’t want Mark to go out with her at all. You didn’t like the idea of someone else going out with your person. 

Mark sighed, “Don’t lie to me.”

You finally put your phone down and faced your boyfriend, “fine.” You sighed, “I don’t like the both of you going out together.”

“Why not?” he questioned, holding back a smile. 

You wanted to roll your eyes. He was doing this on purpose. 

“I…I don’t want you to fall out of love with me,” you whispered, “I don’t want to see you leave me and love someone else.”

Mark sent you a sweet smile, “you don’t have to worry because that will never happen.” 

+Day 24, Wednesday, 1:55 PM

“Done?” Mark questions, you nodded. “Let’s go.”

He passed you your bag, while he grabs his own. “I’ll send you to class.” 

You raised your eyebrows at his words, “isn’t your class at the other end of the building?”

Both of you shared your timetable with each other at the start of the year, and you knew where his class were at. 

“It’s okay,” he sent you a sweet smile, “I’ll make it in time.”

+Day 25, Thursday, 11:08 AM

“Hi, Mark,” Naeun waved at Mark sending him a flirty smile while tucking her hair behind her ear. “Who is this?” she asked, looking at you. 

You wanted to roll your eyes at the glare she was sending you. 

“She’s my girlfriend. I told you about her,” Mark stated, his arms wrapping around your waist protectively. 

“Ah,” Naeun gasped softly. “well, um, I was thinking if you want to go out today? I got an extra ticket for—” 

Mark frowned, “I can’t, I’m hanging out with my girl today. Sorry, Naeun!” 

Right after saying that, both you and Mark walked away, with you giggling next to him. 

+Day 26, Friday, 10:00 AM

You: Markie!!!!!

Markie Pooh: what do you want bitch ass

You: rude!!

You: I need to borrow your sweater ;;

Markie Pooh: ): why

Markie Pooh: it’s my fav sweater babey ):

You: its so cold in this room ):

You: I’m literally freezing rn

Markie Pooh: argh fine

Markie Pooh: you’re so spoiled wtf

Markie Pooh: what room r u in bby

[writingsfromhome]

Nuclear Family II

Part 2: Miscommunications

A/N: part 2!! I was so overwhelmed w how much you guys enjoyed the first part, kind of made my head go blank lol. But now I rewrote it and added more ~spice. Sorry it took so long but I so appreciate all of you engaging w it! 💖

Part I / Part II / Part III / Part IV / Part V

-----------------------------

Sleeping in was not something that existed when you had a child and Harry learns that the hard way. By half past 7, I’m already up because of the poking on my cheeks and when I come out from brushing my teeth, I hear shouts from upstairs.

“Charlotte!” I shout up but I'm ignored. I climb the stairs and locate the door to the small voice. “Charlotte let your dad sleep!” I open the door to Charlie jumping on Harry's bed and Harry rubbing his eyes. His eyes go to mine when the door opens and he lets out a chuckle.

“Parenthood,” I sigh and try to grab Charlie from the bed. She moans to come back and wiggles her way out to run back to the bed. Harry's sitting up at this point and I blush realising he didn’t have on a shirt. I had to stop acting 12.

“I want to play!” Charlie shouts, still jumping.

“Alright you crazy monkey!” Harry grabs our daughter and whispers something to her before attacking her in tickles. She shouts for me to help but when I try to help Harry pulls me into the covers and Charlie climbs atop me to tickle me instead.

“You two sneaks!” I shout between fits of laughter but Charlie soon tires and lays beside me, her head resting on my chest. Harry lies down on the other side of her, propped up on his elbow.

“I’m just going to…” Harry grabs his phone from his bedside table and holds it above us. Charlie already loved posing for cameras, so she grins but I cover my face. “Y/N come on! One photo!”

“Fine but I get to take it,” I bargain. Harry agrees and hands me the phone, shoving in closer so our heads almost touch. I ignore the closeness and stretch the phone above us, getting my good side, and just before I click it I shout “please!” a phrase Charlie used to say when she was younger instead of cheese. It gets a giggle out of her and in the photo her eyes are squinted and her grin is pure joy. Harry is glancing at me with a faint smile on his face while my expression is stretched out in 'please.’

Suddenly the cute family photo disappears as the phone vibrates and a picture of a woman smiling on a boat appears. Harry's girlfriend. My smile curdles as I awkwardly hand over the phone to Harry. It was an abrupt reminder of what Harry and I weren’t, despite the illusion of the photo.

"Let's give your dad some privacy," I pick up Charlotte despite her protests and bring her outside.

"Who's on the phone?" She asks as I seat her on the kitchen counter. I glance at her concerned face and remember that kids were a lot more intuitive than we gave them credit for.

"His friend," I answer as truthfully as I could without breaking her heart. The weeks following our trip Charlie talked so often about having both her mom and dad together-like we were getting together forever. Even though I broke it to her gently, she still carried that flame--I didn't want to extinguish those hopes so early on.

"Is she your friend too?" Charlie asks innocently.

"Just your dad's." I kiss her forehead and then get breakfast started, so by the time Harry comes down it's almost done.

"Shit," Harry says and then glances at our daughter who's too busy with Oreo to notice his language. "I was meant to make you two breakfast your first morning here!"

"It's alright," I shrug, unable to make eye contact. "Just grab a plate."

"I feel awful," Harry joins me in the kitchen. "Have you made coffee yet?"

"No," I glance at the machine.

"I'll do that then."

"Three sugars-"

"And a drop of milk," Harry finishes. "I remember."

"Right," I flush. How odd that we keep tiny details of one another, however useless, for years after we split.

"So I sort of forgot but-"

"Mom!" Charlie interrupts Harry and I tell her it would be a minute.

"Right, well when I was talking just now w-"

"Mom! I'm starving!"

"Charlotte! Give me a minute!" I say sternly before putting the last of her strawberries on the plate. I set Charlie's breakfast up and Harry joins with our coffees. Before we even sit, Charlie begins her monologue about coffee and how she was going to drink it when she's old enough.

"That won't be for a while," I comment, glancing up at Harry who was still standing by his chair.

"I'll drink it when I'm five," she holds up her fingers and counts them down. "Then I can drink it."

Harry and I share a brief glance, him opening his mouth to say something before the doorbell rings.

"Oh sh-uh-I'll get that," Harry rushes to get the door. Charlie spills her juice in the process so I pick up the sippy cup and grab paper towels to mop the spill.

"They're right through here," Harry's voice carries over and he enters again with his...friend.

"Hi," she has a pleasant smile and hips that had obviously never carried a child. My own had never quite recovered.

"Hi," I hold up the dirty towels and quickly lower them, painfully aware of how terrible I looked. I couldn't help but compare myself to Harry's girlfriend-especially when she looked like that.

"You're daddy's friend," Charlotte says matter-of-factly.

"I am!" Her voice raises an octave as she walks towards my daughter. "I'm Miranda it's nice to finally meet you!"

Charlie looks up at me and then back to her. "Why aren't you mommy's friend?"

An awkward silence follows and I can't help but glance at Harry. He rubs the back of his neck before stepping forward towards Charlie.

"I've only just met your mommy," Miranda glances up at me with another smile but this time it's stretched too tight. "But we can all be friends! It's nice to meet you."

Charlie looks at me and I smile at her in encouragement. "Okay," she concedes before going back to her piece of toast.

"Have you had breakfast?" Harry asks her quietly.

"I had a coffee," she answers. "But we'll be late if we don't leave now."

"Have you got somewhere to be?" I ask, unaware as Harry hadn't mentioned it yesterday.

"A friend of mine has a wedding thing," she keeps glancing at Harry even though she talks to me.

"I forgot about it," Harry says. "Miranda reminded me this morning I meant to tell you but the pancake monster kept shouting for her pancakes!"

Charlie giggles and tears into another one.

"We've got to be there half past ten," Miranda says quietly to Harry.

"I'm not even ready!" Harry looks down. "I need to shower too. Give me a half hour."

"This is why I had to come early," she shakes her head at me as if we shared an inside joke. I smile knowing how fake it felt. Harry gives me a pleading look as if to say he was sorry before heading upstairs but I shake my head and go to the kitchen to wash the sticky juice off my hands. I hear Miranda talking to Charlie and stay longer than I needed to in the kitchen before heading out again.

"It was really nice to finally meet you," Miranda tells me after Harry finishes up and they get going. She bends down to high-five Charlotte. "And you too!"

"I'll see you around 5," Harry tells me. "I've left keys so you can just come and go whenever."

"I thought we were going to have lunch together," Charlie pouts, suddenly realizing what this all meant.

"I know love," Harry picks her up. "I forgot about this party I had to go to."

"You never forgot at home," Charlie's bottom lip quivers.

"Dad will be home soon," I take Charlie from Harry before the waterworks could start. "And we're gonna have so much fun together right?"

"It's bullshit!" Charlie shouts. My cheeks colour and Harry's jaw drops before he bites back a laugh.

"Charlotte!" I scold but she runs away from my arms. I meet Miranda's eyes and they're wide as saucers.

"I don't know where she...picked up on that." I say lamely. I never swore in front of her-well rarely did. She must have been listening yesterday. Harry tries to say something about it but I cut him off. "Just go. I'll deal with her."

He hesitates but leaves with Miranda who looks relieved to go. I feel bad for Charlotte, knowing how excited she was to spending her whole first day with Harry and I find myself annoyed at him too for forgetting the event and ruining the plans.

I find our daughter curled up in bed and before I could give her a warning about swearing she's wrapped her arms around my neck and shoves her snotty face in my shoulder, apologizing for saying the bad word.

"As long as I don't hear it again," I say without much conviction. I was too upset with Harry to be upset with her too.

I put Charlotte in front of the TV as I clean up breakfast and try to work through my feelings. I couldn't tell if I was more upset about Harry bailing on us or seeing him with his girlfriend; anyone with eyesight could see they had good chemistry and it bothered me. But I came here knowing he was dating somebody else and knowing nothing would happen between us. But then last night, Harry was more affectionate than he needed to be. Maybe he was working through old emotions too, I figure. Maybe I didn't need to read into every single thing.

I decide that Charlie and I wouldn't feel sorry for ourselves and dress us up to step out. I pay a visit to an old friend and we all go out to lunch-Charlie being kept company by my friend's five year old. As we head out I check my phone to see nine missed calls from Harry and a few texts asking where I was-it was already 6 and I hadn't even noticed.

I text Harry simply saying we were on our way home and listen to Charlie talk about her new friend the whole tube ride home. But once we reach Harry's flat, my mood sours. For starters, his girlfriend is still over and Harry is really upset I hadn't picked up.

"Where've you been?" Harry asks calmly but his annoyance betrays his true feelings.

"Hey," I let Charlotte down. "We were just having a late lunch with y/f/n and time got away from us."

"I've been calling and texting-you didn't hear?" Harry, surprisingly, is still trying to remain calm.

"My phone was away," I laugh off the tension noting that Miranda sat awkwardly at the dining table. "We had the keys so-"

"I was worried," Harry glances at Charlie who was preoccupied.

"You told us we could spend the day out--that's why you gave the keys," I say a little aggressively.

"I wanted-I thought we could go out before dinner since I couldn't spend the morning with Charlotte." Charlie looks up at the sound of her full name.

"I had lots of fun with my new friend," Charlie states and I could tell she was still angry at Harry with the stubborn set of her chin. She'd gotten that from me.

"Just mixed signals," I interrupt. "It's not a big deal-we just need to communicate our plans better, okay?"

"I booked us tickets for a movie," Harry's continues, his voice is definitely bordering on aggressive and I wonder why he was so upset and making such a show while his girlfriend was still here. "And dinner reservations and now that's gone to waste! Keep your phone on you if-"

"No," I say assertively to stop Harry as his voice rises. "I understand I'm living at your place because I had no choice, but you don't get to speak to me like that. We're Charlotte's parents but we're nothing to each other. Next time, don't forget your own plans and communicate to me clearly if you want to go out with all three of us. Now excuse me."

I pick my bag up again and head to the room, my eyes burning and my heart racing. I hear Charlie's little footsteps behind me and I feel guilty that it hadn't even been a day and she had to witness us arguing. Why was parenting so hard?

I stay in the room and don't come out even as Charlie heads back out again when Harry calls us for dinner or when I hear Miranda leave or a movie being put on. I stay on my laptop, working, and ignoring the slight hunger at the back of my mind.

A sharp knock on the door catches my attention. The door opens slightly and Harry stands looking the complete opposite from the afternoon.

"Hi," he lets himself in and leans against the wall. "I wanted to say sorry. I didn't mean to get that upset with you I was more frustrated with myself for forgetting the party in the morning and ruining Charlie's first day here. And I was upset that she was upset with me so I planned something fun with her to make up for it and it fell through too."

I stay silent for a moment, after Harry finishes. I was still upset with him. And that wasn't a good excuse to chew me out in front of his girlfriend.

"I understand that," I shrug. "But I don't appreciate the way you just came at me with all those accusations. Especially in front of our daughter and while your girlfriend was there."

"Miranda's fine," Harry says. "She wouldn't have minded-"

"I minded!" I exclaim. "Oh my god Harry I've only just met her! This isn't my house or my city and to have a stranger sit through an argument with my baby daddy is not very fun."

"Right," Harry gets it. "Sorry. I just...keep feeling like I'm fucking up everything. I wanted Charlie here and to be with her as much as I could and now I have an angry three year old. She only just started talking to me because I gave her extra dessert."

I freeze, "Harry if you gave her extra dessert you're dealing with the consequences."

"What do you mean?" Harry perches on the bed.

"She's going to stay up and be super hyper and I'm not dealing with that."

"Ugh," Harry falls back onto the bed. "This is why I need you. You can't be angry at me, I'm such an amateur at this parenting thing and you're the wise one with all the knowledge like don't give your kid a second helping of dessert."

Harry rubs his eyes from where he lays, his shirt riding up to expose his stomach. I glance away, old feelings stirring up.

"Is there still dinner?" I change the subject.

"Of course," Harry shoots up. "I'll warm some up for you."

As I eat, I'm entertained first by the children's movie and then by Harry dealing with a hyperactive Charlie. She begins hopping around and jumping from couch to couch, tackling Harry and then coming my way. I pick her up and blow raspberries on her belly as she laughs.

"Tire her out quickly," I advise Harry as I go to clean up. "She'll fall asleep faster."

As I settle into bed, my heart twinges hearing the voices outside my room. It sounded like a family, like a family that could be mine. And the thought keeps me up even after the voices die down and Harry carries a sleeping Charlie into the room.

I keep my eyes closed and feel him tuck her in beside me. I sense him standing above the bed, the smell of him grows stronger as he leans over and kisses Charlie goodnight. I feel him hesitate before he presses his lips to my temple. I relive that single moment as he closes the door behind him and Charlie snuggles into me. And I start to realise that staying with Harry was one of my worst ideas yet.

[blank-space-daisy13]

Why I won’t invite my biological father to my wedding.

I wanted to post this on Instagram or Facebook but I don’t want to deal with people saying I’m “drama.” But I wanted to write this out just in case someone is ballsy enough to ask me.

Let’s start off with the fact that after he got with my step mom, he wasn’t really around. He also never really cared or tried to take care of us (my brother and me) unless he absolutely had to.

Before my step mom and when we still lived in the apartment, On nights he had us my mom would drop us off already fed, he’d turn the tv on and go play on his computer until we had to go to bed. If he had us on a weekend, same thing. We’d wake up and he’d feed us breakfast, then tv with him in his room on the computer, lunch, tv, dinner, tv, and bed. When we moved from the apartment we stayed at his buddy’s house where he rented a room but guess what? He’d send us down to the basement all day to watch tv, and let us up for meals.

When my stepmom came into the picture, we started going to Canada. On every single one of his weekends. She was nice, at first. Sooner or later everyone shows their true colors. But she started slowly to get a hold of my dad. (My dad had no boundaries with us and she wanted to “help” my dad learn to discipline, but she’s a little extreme.) I once got punished for saying the word “butt” because we only say, “bum” and he yelled at me. Yelled. I was about 7 or 8. Then I heard my future step mother telling him how good he did. Also while we were there, I remember very few times we actually hung out with my dad. It was always being shoved into the playroom with my brother, future stepsister, and sometimes future stepbrother. (Step mom never had full custody of stepbrother.) We’d never leave the playroom other than for meals like the TV. But at least we weren’t rotting our brains, I guess.

After awhile he decided he wanted 50/50 custody. My stepmom at this point could be brutal emotionally. I remember getting yelled at for not knowing any of my immediate family member’s birthdays. I was about 8 or 9. Kind of shitty don’t you think? Going back to the wanting 50/50 custody, he didn’t actually want us. Looking back I understand this now. He just didn’t want to pay as much child support, and that’s probably the only reason my step mom agreed to this. They treated us (my brother and i) horribly. He moved close to my mom’s to prove he’d be willing to do the 50/50 custody, and at that point it was hell. If we did something wrong, immediately we’d get soap in the mouth. My brother later on was getting hot sauce. It would be for things such as, “not sharing with your step sister,” (which she would’ve lied about) or “talking back,” when as a kid I was asking a simple question about their rules. They had so many rules to the point you didn’t realize you were breaking a rule until they told you it was one. My *fondest* memory was when they’d send us kids to the basement for a few hours during the weekend and then got mad when we went through boxes and such to find toys to play with. Because when they first sent us down there, they sent us down there with nothing at all. Sure we probably shouldn’t have gone through boxes, where my brother and I found our toys that they never put with our step sister’s toys, but they sent us down there with nothing at all. They expected us to “imagine” things with no toys. I also got yelled at one weekend because they asked us to clean our bathrooms. (Step sister and I shared a Jack and Jill bathroom and my brother had his own bathroom as well.) We went and picked things up and went back to play. They both yelled at us and said, “If I had meant pick up I would’ve said pick up. I said CLEAN.” At this point I had never cleaned a bathroom in my life. They gave us the cleaning supplies and we went to work. I did what I thought was the best I could do and then my stepmom yells at me, “That wasn’t nearly long enough!!!! Haven’t you ever cleaned a bathroom before?!” Uh no ma’am, I was literally 10. But that was her favorite way to make us feel like shit. To yell, “Haven’t you done XY&Z before?” Or “You don’t know (blank)?! So disrespectful! You should know these things!” (That was said about the birthdays. Again I was a decently young kid.) But going forward, towards the end of them living there, they had a baby together, my other brother J.

Luckily for my brother and I, he eventually gave up going for the 50/50 custody. But with doing this, he left and we didn’t see him for a long time. 5-6 years approximately. I was 15 when he decided he wanted to see us again, and because of everything we had gone through before, we didn’t want to. I had a choice but my brother didn’t, and I was forced to go.

At this point he had married my stepmother, and was living in the same subdivision, and one road away, where had had a house with my mom when they were married. Kind of awkward but ok.

And I have to say, they were better. To a point. They wanted us to feel bad that we didn’t want to be there. At the time I had a really old phone, not a smart phone, that didn’t lock, but they expected my phone to be on the counter at 9pm every night. They read my texts and held them against me, but when I called them out on reading my texts, they told me I was crazy. I would text my friends that I didn’t want to be there, and that I was uncomfortable. They asked me, “Why don’t you want to be here? Why are you uncomfortable? We understand what we did in the past was wrong, but the past is the past and you have to forgive us!” (One wrong thing I was always taught was you always have to forgive. You don’t always have to forgive for things that hurt you.) Finally at the end of this period, they sat us down and tried to make us feel bad by saying, “If you don’t want to be here, we don’t want you here. We want you to want to be here.” At 15 I tried to explain why this was hard, but they didn’t care. It wasn’t their way so they weren’t ok with it.

Fast forward to my Senior Year of high school, I don’t remember how, but my father and I got in touch. My step mom wanted nothing to do with me because of a dumb YouTube video I made at 14 where I “talked shit” about her daughter and herself. Yes, I did, but who didn’t do something dumb at 14? I wasn’t allowed around their house because HER son had a “drug problem.” (Marijuana) Whatever, I didn’t care. Slowly we lost touch because I was the only one calling, and I got sick of it. I was done. But I was still young.

Fast forward to me being a sophomore in college. I was 20 or 21. My brother had an issue that got the police and CPS involved. My father decided to text me and ask me what was going on. I called him and told him that he had “no fucking reason to know what was going on” because he was never around. He gaslighted me into feeling bad because I cussed him out for 10 minutes. But we kept contact after that because I had thought about it and I wanted to get to know my little brother J more. We did lose contact again but then we gain it back later on.

Skip forward a couple years and I’m talking to my cousin, (another thing was he kept us from his side of the family and I had lost contact with most of them until I was an adult.) my cousin told me he was going to MY little BABY sister’s 1st birthday. My father had been talking to me for a few months at this point and NEVER mentioned I had a baby sister. He told me, “I thought your aunt posted about it. I saw it on Facebook and assumed you knew!” It doesn’t matter whether I saw it on Facebook or not. He should’ve told me. But whatever, I let that go too.

Here is where I get frustrated. I wouldn’t call for a couple weeks because I didn’t think about it. I’ve only seen him twice in the past 9 years. But he would blame me for us not talking, when he’d never call or try to talk to me. It drives me crazy when people think like that. It’s not just my responsibility and mine alone.

Skip forward to a few months ago when he brought up politics. I hated this because I’m mostly liberal/democrat and he’s 100% republican. He called liberals “libtards” and goes, “you’re not a libtard are you?” And when I tell him it’s offensive he says, “It’s just a joke!” But now we’re here and yet again it’s been 2 or 3 months since we’ve spoken because he’s blocked my number. It goes straight to voicemail and my texts aren’t going through as iMessages. I’ve decided after trying for over two months, he’s uninvited to the wedding. He’s never met my fiancé, ever. We were only inviting him to be civil. But if he can’t even speak to me, I feel it’s not my problem, and it’s one less drama issue to worry about at the wedding.

My family can believe what they want. There are so many things left out of this 15 year drama circle of my father just disappearing. And I don’t care anymore. I hope someone asks why he wasn’t invited because I know for a fact he’ll be at least telling the whole family that he wasn’t invited. And I don’t mind sending them this so they can know why.