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#this really made my day; thank you so much
drchucktingle · 1 day
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sometimes buds ask’ what is it like to be a neurodivergent artist?’ and this is great summary: the charts can look like this, and at same time people will be endlessly posting on how you are ‘not real’ or ‘a bit’. you can hold bestsellers in slot 1 to 4 and still not be 'serious'
i am ultimately ok with this. i love my trot and would not have it any other way, but i think it is worth investigation. when irony poisoning has seeped into everything, how many times does a neurodivergent person have to say ‘actually this is NOT so bad its good. its just good’
when you are autistic, or queer, or both, how much proof do you need to be considered good art? or good business? what do the charts have to look like for me to be a ‘real’ author? or allowed my face mask at a library association conference? or one person not a group of writers?
im coming up on a decade of writing tinglers soon, and people are still talkin about my ‘serious’ works vs my ‘joke books’ and at every turn, as kindly as i can, i shout from the rooftops: THEY ARE ALL SERIOUS BOOKS. THIS IS NOT A BIT.
but its hard when buds have had ‘the correct way to be a writer. the correct way to be an artist. the COOL way to react to a book that is TOO weird’ pounded into their heads by internet culture. 'kill it with fire' they say. 'i need eye bleach' they say without thinking. a line.
heres the thing, the tide IS turning. theres buckaroos jumping in and saying, ‘I want to be a part of this’ and for that they are being rewarded. the publisher who took me seriously is lookin pretty dang good right now with these charts and these sales. i am honored and moved
over time there will be more buds who shed that irony mask. the tide of sincerity is powerful, and the tide of love is inevitable. it is difficult to stand strong in our uniqueness but it also pays off, and I hope to be a shining example. eventually THE TIMELINE BENDS TO YOU
so this is not a thread to complain. i have been trotting long enough that these things do not really bother me. being made fun of and disparaged as ‘not legit art’ while also being objectively successful at the things im made fun of about is kind of the ocean that i swim in.
no. my point of this is to say THANK YOU to those of you who have been trotting by my side over these years. THANK YOU for proving love to me. im so honored by your support, and you should know that YOU have seen beyond the irony poisoned veil that stops many others. YOU get it.
and to those with their own unique perspective on creation: look what you can do. yes there will likely be a lot of resistance to something different, but there is also a LOT of reward. YOU can trot a new path. YOU can prove love is real, not in MY way, but IN YOUR OWN WAY
anyway thank you for reading buckaroos. thank you for your support. LUCKY DAY comes out next summer and it is probably as FAR OUT and existential as the tingleverse has ever gone. you can preorder it here
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httpsserene · 2 days
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𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐤𝐞𝐥𝐩 (𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩) | 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐱 𝐚𝐥𝐛𝐨𝐧
summary: a random man breaks your phone and runs away before you can even yell at him. he becomes your archenemy when you learn that you lost hundreds of photos of your children. and by “your children”, you mean pups—seal pups.
pairing: alex albon x seal specialist! fem!black!reader
from, serene: do not post any gifts you get on social media. that's how people get robbed /srs. i'm trying to make my reader's have different personalities but i think i failed with this one. i'll try on the next smau. happy reading, loves xxx
⌕ join taglist | feedback & requests | upcoming chapters | table of contents | seal you later toc | next ↻
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messages • yn -> coral (yn’s coworker)
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twitter • alex_albon
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twitter • sealteamsix
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messages • max please unmute us gc -> alex
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twitter dm’s • alex -> yn
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messages • yn -> coral
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twitter dm’s cont. • alex -> yn
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messages cont. • yn -> coral • alex -> max please unmute us gc
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igstory • seallygirlyn just uploaded!
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[caption1; optimus prime being a very brave boy while being weighed][caption2; cutely decorated suspicious packages are about to be unboxed. if i'm inactive just know alex_albon is responsible!]
alex_albon: his name is optimus prime 🥹🤧 seallygirlyn: it's adorable right? seallygirlyn: when he first got rescued he was fighting with another pup named megatron, so the naming was easy lol
coral: that looks like a lot more than an iphone 🤨 seallygirlyn: i told him to keep it reasonable! but i fear he went too far,,,
user: wow he was really serious about finding you. lwk kinda sweet. it's giving loverboy. 🤭 seallygirlyn: loll don’t read to far into it! he’s just a generous guy ☺️ user: if you say so….
messages • yn -> coral • twitter dm’s • yn -> alex
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instagram • seallygirlyn • august 26th
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liked by alex_albon, georgerussell63, coral, and 17,364 others
seallygirlyn when you ask a man to replace your phone that he broke, he might buy you the newest phone and a bunch of other things (you told him not to get !!) you can't buy my favor, yk? fish says thank you for the stuffie. thank you from me too, alex_albon. this is seriously too much to give for a broken iphone.
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seallygirlyn: going to miss using a flip phone lwk...tysm alex_albon i made it look all pretty in the basket in hopes it fixes your lightly ruined public image
➥ alex_albon: am i forgiven? ➥ seallygirlyn: i already forgave u alex, i told you this 🙂 ➥ alex_albon: just wanted you to say it where everybody can see it! they're still slandering my name ➥ seallygirlyn: you can replace my phone and my dying ipad but, you can never recover my lost seal photos :( ➥ alex_albon: i will pay for your icloud storage from this point forward until my dying breath ➥ seallygirlyn: i need that in writing with a signature ✍️
coral: i told you alex is a good guy! that's why he's been my favorite since f2!!!
➥ seallygirlyn: he's been moved from biggest adversary to occasional nemesis status ➥ alex_albon: that's improvement, i'll take it! thanks for supporting me from before the start, coral! dedicating my next points to both of you! ➥ coral: imgoingtofaint 😵‍💫
georgerussell63: ah. this must be why alex made me pay for his mcdonalds the other day. he spent all of his money on you
➥ alex_albon: GEORGE PLEASE 😟😣 ➥ user1: george is such an instigator. he lives to stir shit up i swear ➥ user2: russell, george. professional cockblocker extraordinaire.
user3: it's a little odd that a man would buy a woman he has no romantic interest in so many expensive gifts....
➥ user4: lol these gifts aren't expensive. the cost was nothing to him, he's an f1 driver and she's nothing compared to him 😒 ➥ user5: jealous little girl alert user4 🚨 ➥ user6: she's nothing compared to him? the woman who works tirelessly to rehabilitate seal pups and release them back into the ocean—the woman who's actively conserving the ocean and protecting marine life, is nothing compared to him? the man who drives an f1 car in circles? try again, girly. you're just jealous any RESPECTABLE man wouldn't give you the time of day. ➥ user7: CLOCK IT ➥ user8: read you like a book user4 🤣
user9: you have an orange cat named fish 🥺
➥ seallygirlyn: yes! isn't he the sweetest boy to ever exist? ➥ user9: i'd kill for fish 🫶🏻
user12: fish and his stuffie are the cutest!!!! i just wanna bite him
➥ alex_albon: not as cute as seallygirlyn ➥ seallygirlyn: ...who asked you? are you calling fish ugly?? ➥ alex_albon: what? NO !!! i was calling you cute?! ➥ user13: that was difficult to read ngl ➥ user14: mission failed. we'll get 'em next time.
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general taglist (ask to join):
@saintslewis/@cherry2stems/@lorarri/@mindless-rock/@biancathecool
@barnestatic/@darleneslane/@lovingaphroditesworld/@smoothopz/@vetteltea
@tallrock35/@spideybv28/@loomiscorpse/@hiireadstuff/@namgification
@gg-trini/@multi-fandom-rando/@landoslutmeout/@love-simon/@iloveyou3000morgan/
@rexit-mo/@oscahpastry/@sweatrevenge5436-blog/@bokutos-babyowl/@oliviah-25
@evermoreandroyalblue/@riveristhebest1/@xylinasdiary/@ashiekins/@flowergirl1134
@hearts4robs/@c-losur3/@bloodyymaryyy/@awritingtree/@lammys-thinking
seal you later taglist (ask to join):
@poppysrin@everythingabby101@mangotaitai
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© httpsserene 2024 — photos used from pinterest. do not re-upload.
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gguk-n · 2 days
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Hello!! I love your writing style!!
Can you pls do a max verstappen x reader but he’s still into Kelly max is sorry, reader disappeared goes to Korea gets together with jungkook plus now she’s a successful CEO n 2 yrs later she comes back as a baddie fans love her n max regrets
It’s set in 2021 comes back in 2024
P.s make her friends with Charles n Lewis
Thank you hope u take this in consideration
This ask was made in my dreams🥹🥹 thank you to the beautiful nonnie for sending this. I made this as an smau and some writing. I had so much fun making this!!!🫣🫣 hope you enjoy reading this too🥹🥹 changed the timeline a little bit for the story. Max is an ass, sorry. I love Max really but the story needed it
Drifting Into Love
Face Claim- Kim Hye yoon. (Every thing is fiction)
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Max was back the next day. Y/N returned from Belgium and was waiting for Max in her apartment in Monaco. Max was one of the very few people who knew that Y/N came from wealth. Her parents had raised her humbly in hopes that the money won't get to her head and she would be a kind and compassionate human. Right now, she felt anything but kind. She felt like smashing Max to a pulp. How dare he lie to her and who does he think he is to humiliate her like this. If he loved her, he should've stayed with her, she thought.
Max stumbled into her house in a panic. "Schat, why are you here?" Max asked trying to hug her. "What do you mean?" she asked. "I mean't why aren't you home?" he asked. She chuckled. "Max, I will not be in a cheater's house, god knows who all you've brought over." she said shaking her head. "I never brought anyone home. And as for Kelly this was a prior arrangement and I couldn't get out of it" he reasoned. "Then you should've told me. I would've come along. But you lied, you knew what you were doing is wrong, that's why you lied to me." she retaliated. "I, Y/N, schat....please" he stuttered. "You have nothing to say Max, also don't call me that. I'm not your girlfriend." she said. "Don't say that" Max said. "I don't care if you love Kelly, I just wish you hadn't lied to me." she lamented. "I'm sorry, I'll do better. I promise" he tried reasoning. "Max, you don't need to. You clearly still love her. I do not plan on being a home wrecker. I hope you both are happy" Y/N said. "Won't you fight for this? our relationship" he asked now in tears. "No, we stopped being a couple the moment you went back to her" she said with a stoic expression. "I'm sorry. You deserve better" Max said hoping she would stay. "I agree. Now can you leave, I have some work to do" she said ushering Max out.
Unbeknownst to Max, she had cried. The all of yesterday, really and Charles and Lewis were ready to kill Max. She some how convinced them not to. They had spent the whole night consoling her and taking care as she tried to mend her broken heart.
y/n.y/l/n
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Liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 23,976 others
y/n.y/l/n Don't forget to take out the trash🙏🙏
user17 What is going on?? Is this related to Max??😭😭 user18 She said, I ain't no one's second choice🫣🫣 user19 She's so pretty!! I wish I was her❤️❤️ charles_leclerc We can take it out for you👀 lewishamilton me and Charles are great at waste disposal. I can compost too🙂 user20 What does Lewis mean by that??They are scaring me🙃🙃 user21 I think she broke up with Max and obviously her best friends hate him, he cheated on their angel.😳😳 user22 I would also compost a man if he cheated on my bestie, I get it lewishamilton 😤😤
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y/n.y/l/n
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Liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 289,297 others
y/n.y/l/n Gonna miss my fav photographer🫣😘😍
user23 That photographer is doing us all a service😍😍 user24 I didn't know she could look prettier🥹❤️❤️ user25 The first photo will no one talk about it🤨😳😳 arthur_leclerc Are those hands that photographers?🤔🤔 charles_leclerc arthur_leclerc what do you know?😩😩 lewishamilton we have the cutest bestie, the photographer better not be a man😒 user26 I'm scared of having both Lewis and Charles as best friends, they are too over protective🤣🤣
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y/n.y/l/n
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Liked by charles_leclerc, lewishamilton and 1,297,229 others
y/n.y/l/n 보고 싶, 돌아와요오빠😭😭💜💜 miss you!! come back oppa
user27 eww!! Oppa you can't date her, you are supposed to end up with me🤮🤮 user28 I don't get what he saw in her??😒😒 user29 Fandom cleanse here I come🤣🤣 user30 She's so pretty. To bag Jungkook, I mean he has taste❤️❤️ charles_leclerc he's the mystery photographer?🤔 lewishamilton can't believe you didn't tell me😤😤 y/n.y/l/n lewishamilton in my defence, you are scary but my boyfriend could take you out ☺️😉 user31 I love the brother sister dynamic Lewis and Y/N have😂😂 user32 she hard launched the fuck out of her relationship❤️❤️🙏 user33 user32 she's staking her claim. I would too, if I was dating Jungkook💜💜😍
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Y/N was walking towards the Ferrari when she bumped into Max. "Hello Max" she smiled. "Hi" he replied. "How have you been?" he asked. "Good. You?" she asked. "Good. Surprise to see you here" he said. "Yeah, my best friends said they missed me so.." she said. "Ah yes, Lewis and Charles" Max mulled. "I'll get going then" she announced. "No, wait" Max stopped her. "I'm sorry" he apologised. "For what?" she asked. "For hurting you. I really did like you." he explained. "me too." she lamented. "Can't we try again" he proposed. She let out a big and loud laugh, making Max embarrassed and heads turn. "Sorry Max, but that ship sailed long ago. Aren't you still with Kelly, though?" she asked. Max didn't say anything. "Don't flip flop, love a woman correctly and truly. Also, I'm engaged." she said pointed at her left hand which had a beautiful large diamond on the ring finger which looked like it had found it's rightful owner. "Wish you good luck and Congratulations on the championship last year" she called out while she walked away. Max could only stare at her as she disappeared from his sight.
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under pressure | katie mccabe x teen reader x caitlin foord
thank you to the anon that requested this one. it's been fun to write it!
i think i'm gonna plan a part 2 of this maybe, depending on what reaction i get from this one...
pairings: katie mccabe x teen reader x caitlin foord
summary: there's a lot of pressure that comes with being the next big thing in women's football sometimes
warning: talks of a eating disorder and angst
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It sometimes felt like you had the world at your feet. You were well aware of the word on the street that you were the next big thing in women’s football. The headlines were quick to label you as a future star, comparing you to legends like Marta or Sam Kerr, but of course being the youngest to sign a professional contract sometimes came with a certain level of expectations, and that was something that nobody could really prepare you for the weight that would follow.
Living alongside Katie McCabe and Caitlin Foord felt like a dream in itself like it would for any football-crazy teenager and you were no different, you moved in with them after your own parents couldn’t travel to England with you. 
Caitlin and Katie were quick to become more than just teammates or mentors, they became family.
It should’ve been perfect– It mostly was.
At least until the pressure started to become too much for you, the media scrutinised everything about you: your every move, every game, every slip-up. There felt like there was never any room for mistakes and it started to take its toll on you.
The expectations suffocated you and you started to believe the medias’ words, not only the media but the pressure of fans as well, you felt like you were weighed down by an anker of harsh criticism.
Maybe if you were smaller– lighter, you could be faster. You could be better.
It only started small, barely noticeable in fact, just skipping meals and convincing yourself that you were just too busy. The comments on how lean you looked pushed you further, but it didn’t take long for the innocent excuses to morph into something darker.
The hunger pains were a lot easier to bear than the suffocating pressure, but you should have realised that it would be harder to hide, and before long, it wasn’t just you who had noticed the toll it was taking on you.
“You seem a lot quieter today kid,” Caitlin was the first to pick up on your bitter mood as you made your way out of the London Colney and headed in the direction of where Katie had parked her car earlier on when you all arrived for training, “What’s going on?”
“Nothing, I’m all good,” You gave her a weak smile and kept your shoulders slouched as you opened the car door to climb in.
Are you sure, kiddo?” Katie noted the exhausted look on your face as she opened the car door and climbed in, “Cait’s right, you don’t seem like yourself today.”
“I’m fine Katie,” You all but growled in response and slumped down in the backseat of the car, “I’ve already told you I’m fine, so just leave it, will you?” You hadn’t meant to be rude but you really do hate all the persistent questions being fired at you.
You hated being the centre of attention, despite what the media said about you.
It didn’t take long for you to begin feeling the weight of guilt, “Sorry, didn’t mean to snap like that.”
“It’s okay kiddo,” Katie replied, glancing in the rearview mirror and giving you a reassuring smile, “How about when we get home, we order pizza. My treat?” She offered.
Your smile faltered at the mention of food. Your stomach was hurting from the hunger, but couldn’t give in to the temptations, “Um, it’s okay, I don’t really fancy pizza, thanks,” You respond, biting your bottom lip.
You missed Katie and Caitlin sharing a glance with each other, catching the hesitation in your voice. It was subtle, but they both knew you well enough to notice.
At one point, you used to jump at the chance for pizza nights– especially after a long day of training and now you barely even showed an ounce of interest.
“Okay,” Katie simply nodded and started the ignition of her car up.
The drive back home was quiet, too quiet. The hum of the engine mixed in with the quiet volume of noise in the car filled the silence, but your thoughts were still loud. You couldn’t help but stare out the window, feeling the familiar tightening in your chest.
You hated the fact that they were starting to notice more, it was easier when they didn’t and you could still pretend that things were fine, even if they definitely were not.
You couldn’t ignore the way that your hands trembled slightly from exhaustion or the pounding in your head that had become all too familiar lately.
You just had to pretend for a little while longer.
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Back at the house, you immediately make a beeline for your bedroom while muttering something about needing a shower. As soon as you closed the door, you leaned against it and took a deep breath. 
The initial feeling of hunger gnawed at you but you try to shove it aside, heading into the bathroom to splash cold water on your face all while ignoring the mirror, knowing you wouldn’t like what you saw.
“Hey kid! We’re gonna watch a film, do you want to come and join us?” Caitlin shouted upstairs to get your attention and you jolted slightly in shock.
“Uh, yeah, I’m coming!” You respond, turning the tap off and dabbing your face with a towel before making your way back into your bedroom, you shove a cosy hoodie on and shove your hair up in a messy bun before you head back downstairs to join the two of them.
“Here she is,” Katie exclaimed, gesturing for you to join them in the living room, “Where just deciding what film to watch, do you have anything you’d like to watch?” She questioned.
“Um, I don’t mind. I’m fine with anything,” You told her, plopping down on the sofa beside them as you listened to the two of them argue about what to watch.
Usually it was pretty comical when that happened, but you didn’t have it in you to laugh this time round.
The tension in the room was thick, and you knew it was only a matter of time before they brought it up again.
After what felt like an eternity, Caitlin broke the silence, “Y/N, we’re worried about you.”
Your stomach dropped and you should have known this was coming, but it still felt like a punch in the gut.
“You’re not eating, you’re not sleeping,” Katie leaned forward, her expression soft but serious, “You don’t seem like yourself, and we know that the pressure is a lot, but you know that you don’t need to carry it all by yourself.”
“I’m fine,” You shook your head, feeling the familiar panic rise in your chest, “I just have a lot going on right now.”
“We get it kid, but starving yourself isn’t the way to handle things,” Caitlins’ tone of voice was gentle but still firm. “There’s better ways to cope.”
You couldn’t help the tears that pricked at your eyes, but you blinked them away and refused to let them fall, “I’m not starving myself,” You whispered, trying to convince yourself more than them, “I just… I need to be better. I’m not good enough.”
“Y/N, you’re more than good enough,” Katie’s heart broke at your words as she scooted closer and placed her hand on your knee, “You’re incredible, and not just because of football but because of who you are, okay. You can’t do this to yourself, you can’t push yourself to the point where you’re hurting, kiddo.”
Your resolve was crumbing, you suddenly felt the weight of everything that you’d been holding in starting to break down, “I just… I don’t want to let anyone down,” You admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Hey, come here,” Caitlin reached over and pulled you into a tight hug, “You’re not letting anyone down, kid. We’re so proud of you– so proud. We just need you to take better care of yourself, and we’re not just talking about football here either. We care about you.”
Burying your face in her shoulder, the tears finally spilled, “I’m scared,” You choked out, “I… I don’t know how to stop.”
Katie soon joined the hug, her arms wrapping around both you and Caitlin, “You don’t have to do it alone,” She paused, “We’re here, we’ll help you, but you need to let us in.”
It felt like for the first time in a long time, you allowed yourself to be vulnerable. To let them see just how scared and overwhelmed you really were, with all the added pressure of things.
It now made you realise that maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to face it all on your own after all.
You could let them in.
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© scribblesofagoonerr
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ghouldtime · 2 days
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Mean König this, loser König that blah blah blah
How about instead König being the introvert he is with weirdly specific hobbies to match. I'm thoroughly convinced this guy has an army of miniatures (which he all HAND PAINTED, thank you very much).
How about König being frugal and reusing a lot of things or DIY'ing them himself. Things are always too expensive these days and why on earth would he buy a new one when he has one he picked up years ago that works just fine?? C'mon, he made a mask out of a t-shirt, can't convince me that's the only thing he's reused or repurposed.
He's not a gross, disgusting pervert who snorkels with the sludges of humanity in the bottom of the degenerate barrel. [Going to go on the record to say write what you want, that's your choice. But at the same time, it's my choice to say: Genuinely, what the fuck to a LOT of what I've seen in the König tag]
He's also not an UWU shy guy who cries because you took his mask off. Please, his voice lines are so cocky, he's not going to sob and cower because some jackass tried harassing him these days. He's a damn good solider, he's proud of it, he knows it and knows how to use it
Still going to call him baby girl, doesn't make him any less of one, he's just not a wimp with no backbone who crumples into a heap because someone mildly made fun of him. He breaks backs, I'm sure he's kept at least a spine of his own (at least as a souvenir)
Social anxiety doesn't always mean being ridiculously sensitive and the lack of research put into it when it comes to writing König realllllly shows. Proper representation matters and when it's reduced to being a stuttering, co-dependent mess who can barely function on their own and is just overly clinging, it's not cute - it's hurting the narrative around it and further perpetuating untrue and negative stereotypes.
Social anxiety means many different things to many different people and shows itself in so so many ways. No two people experience it or feel it the exact same way, but it's helping NO ONE when you're ignoring blatant characterization of it and how it presents for someone to change it so you can meld them into a stereotypical box
Rant over, I just love König so much (he was my initial draw to this whole fandom) and hate seeing what's done to him in some really, REALLY deplorable extremes
Going to probably write a König reader insert at some point out of spite alone at this rate
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shadowsingercassia · 2 days
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Hiya, bb! 🫶
Vi here! Little fic request (no pressure ❤️)
So basically, it’s a Azriel x Y/N (because we all love Azzy, 🥰) Reader is Nesta’s friend and she asks if she can join the Valkyrie training and Nesta is like “ofc bb” but since they are so far in training, Nesta sets Reader up with Azriel for private training, and Az is like “ok”
But Nesta doesn’t inform our favourite bat-boy that Reader is actually really good at training and ends up kicking Azzy’s butt in their first lesson, and then Az becomes obsessed with her 😍
I’m not making much sense but I’d love to see if you could write it! If anyone can bring this story to life, it’s you 🥰
Love ya Xx ✨🤍
I absolutely love this request (always love my badass readers)!! 🤭❤️
Love you too, Vi!! Thank you for requesting this 💕
Also I'm really sorry for sometimes disappearing for a week or two 😭
So anywayssss
Training Gone... Right? | Azriel x reader
Summary: read message
Warnings: mentions of blood reader being a LITTLE violent while training with Azriel (its not too graphic dont worry!) 😌, cute little obsessed Azriel 😊💕 (also there is a curse word but ignore it) let me know if I missed anything!!
Words: 1.4k!
Little note: 3 povs, (Nesta, Azriel and reader) but mostly it's Az!
Nesta:
Nesta looked up from her book as she saw you entering the library. A determined expression had found its way onto your face. She reached over for her bookmark, closing the book and placing it on the table beside her.
As you approached her, your steps firm and confident, she raised an eyebrow. You stopped in front of her, and your gaze met hers. She couldn't have helped it when her grey eyes softened.
"I want to learn how to fight," you state, your hands clasped behind your back. Nesta's face brike off into a smirk. Clearly, she had been waiting for you to ask her.
Knowing you, and your past, it was logical that you would want to learn how to fight, and honestly, she was eager to train you.
After that, you joined the Valkyries, training with them daily. Nesta, Gwyn, and Emerie all taught you how to fight. The different techniques and fighting styles. Nesta observed you throwing a punch at Emerie, catching her off-guard. She knew you would be almost - if not - better than the rest of the Valkyries in no time. When you were determined, nothing would get in your way.
And Nesta had gotten another thought, late at night, as she read the new novel she borrowed from the library. She would set you up to train with Azriel.
Of course, you had seen Azriel once or twice while visiting Nesta in the House of Wind, but he doesn't know you were training with the Valkyries. Nesta had made sure of that.
The next day in training, she approached you as you ran through the stretches. Sunlight hit your skin, making it look golden. Taking her place close to you, she began stretching as well. "Do you remember Azriel?" She asked, turning her head slightly to look into your face.
She saw you pause for a moment before you answered her. "The shadowsinger, right?" You asked her back, furrowing your eyebrows. Nodding, she answered, "yes, the shadowsinger."
"Right, what about him?" You asked her, confused about why she would bring him up like that. Nesta rarely spoke of the shadowsinger with you. "I was wondering if you would be alright with inviting him to train with us tomorrow," she said nonchalantly, shrugging her shoulders.
"I wouldn't mind it, no," you said, still partially confused, but the anticipation of tomorrow gnawed at you. The door opened, Gwyn striding in, giving both you and Nesta a wave. Smiling, you wave back at her.
Reader (Y/n):
Training was surprisingly light today, and while it usually lasted longer, Nesta had retired early, then Gwyn, and lastly Emerie, leaving you alone. Not that you minded it, Nesta told you she was going to spend the afternoon with her mate, Gwyn saying Clotho needed her help in the library, and then Emerie deciding to spend the rest of the day doing her own things.
However, you wanted to train a bit more, as you always did. Perhaps that was why you had gotten so good, because you stayed about another few hours and practice what you learned that day.
As the sun slowly set behind the Illyrian mountains, the last rays disappearing beneath the horizon, you took a break. Sitting down, you roll back your shoulders, watching the sky shift from the golden hues to a dark blue. A sense of calm washed over you when the stars started appearing like bright flecks against the darkness.
You lost track of time, too deep into your thoughts to come out. Though eventually, you winnowed to your bedroom, taking a quick bath, and laying off to rest.
Azriel:
Strapping his siphons in place, he was about to go train you. Nesta had asked if he could train Y/n, and Azriel couldn't refuse.
As he winnowed to the roof of the House of Wind, he found you alone, getting ready for training. The leather trousers you wore were rolled up to your knees, letting the chill morning breeze kiss the exposed skin.
Azriel had been told by Nesta that you were a new Valkyrie. She just hadn't told him that you had started training with them more than a year ago. Nesta wasn't lying though, you were the newest member of the Valkyries (and the best one in sparring).
His gaze locked with yours, and you gave him a brief smile, which he returned, much to his surprise.
"Quick spar before the others get here?" You suggest, and Azriel nods. Wait, the others? Azriel had been told this was a private training... that's when he noticed one of his shadows, wrapped around your wrist. As his gaze locked there, your own eyes followed, looking at the shadow. You hadn't realized, he noticed as he watched your expression.
Dismissing it, he took his fighting stance, and you quickly did the same. Azriel took in your stance, eyebrows raising as he looked at your near-perfect stance. Maybe you knew a few things about sparring.
He quickly knew that 'a few things' was a lot. You threw punches, most of them hitting their marks on various parts of his body. Azriel could feel the sore spots, knowing they would bruise sooner or later. A groan slipped past his lips as your knee drove itself to his stomach. Stumbling back, he clutched his abdomen, sharp pain shooting through his body.
You didn't falter and that one moment was all it took before you landed a hook to his jaw. His face snapped sideways and he really tried to get himself together. Not even his shadows could predict you.
Suddenly, he was swept off his feet, his back hitting the training mat. The breath was knocked off his lungs and he gasped, struggling to draw air into his lungs. Every coherent thought left his mind but he managed to roll over and scramble to his feet before he could receive another blow.
You dodged most of his jabs, although a few found their targeted spots. Exhausted, that was what Azrisl was. Seemingly, you were exhausted as well, although less than him.
It didn't make sense. Azriel had been training for more than five hundred years and yet you, that have been training for cauldron knows how long, are beating him. He would be having a talk with Nesta after today.
His footwork started to falter slightly, and of course you would notice that too. Taking full advantage of his state, you manage to knock him off his feet again.
"I yield! Cauldron, I yield." He panted, his eyes closing momentarily. Once he opened his eyes again, he was met with the sight of you, hand extended to him.
Azriel froze. Before, he hadn't fully taken you in, but now, you were right in from of him, and Cauldron, you looked ethereal. He had competely forgotten his bleeding nose and the bruises that had started to bloom on his skin as he stared at you.
A thin layer of sweat coated your body, your training leathers clinging to you like a second skin. Strands had fallen free from the simple hairstyle you wore, sticking to your forehead, and falling into your eyes and you pushed them back. His gaze flickered to your parted lips, almost unconsciously, as you drew in heavy breaths. Quickly, he averted his gaze, not wanting to be caught at you, and especially not wanting to be caught staring at your lips.
Realizing he had been dozing off for too long, he grasped your hand in his. Planting his feet onto the ground, you helped pull him up. Finally standing back on his feet, his thoughts replayed Nesta's words. She's the newest Valkyrie. Mhm, he's noticed that, he thought, slightly annoyed at Nesta. Who could have thought the newest Valkyrie would be that good?
Even Nesta couldn't beat him, neither Gwyn or Emerie, and yet this woman had handed his ass to him today.
And he found himself stunned.
And perhaps a little obsessed... but he wouldn't admit that to himself.
Nobody came and as you and Azriel waited, he finally spoke. "Do you think the others will come?"
"No," you reply. After a beat of silence, you speak again. "I'll go find Nesta," you say as you walk towards the door.
"You're a worthy opponent, shadowsinger." The door closed behind you and Azriel was at a loss of words, a flush tinging his cheeks. Get it together, Az, he thought, but the image of you refused to leave his mind.
Obsessed indeed.
-------------------------☆-------------------------
a/n: I had so much fun writing this, I was giggling the whole time! Again thank you so much @anarchiii for this request! I hope you like it, because I adjusted it slightly 💓
general taglist: @blessthepizzaman @amara-moonlight @homeslices @flourishandblotts-inc @anarchiii
comment '💕' to be added to my general taglist!
Love, Cassia ❤️
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adokyoguen · 3 days
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hi! I have a req idea - Gojo tearing up when yn kisses his forehead as he’s never felt so vulnerable 🫠
take care :)
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Basically, for me, satoru wouldn't cry in front of Y/N because he wants to continue being the strongest for her.
BUUT, that wouldn't stop him from crying over her in hiding 😏
Here it is, I made it short but if you want a continuation please feel free!
Please forgive any mistakes and correct me! I needed the translator's help several times. :((
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Your eyes slowly opened so that you could adjust to the brightness of the room. You felt sore, several parts of your body including your abdomen and forehead were bandaged.
But... what really happened?
Oh, right, you and the second-year students had just fought Suguru, everyone was completely destroyed, and that included you. Sure, Gojo arrived late, but he was able to end Suguru's life. When he found you, you were lying on the floor, completely injured, as were Panda, Inumaki and Maki.
Taking you all to the infirmary was a difficult job, even more so when you were so fragile that Satoru thought he would break you if he held you wrong.
You were one of the first to receive treatment from Shoko, your bleeding was internal, but thank God you were fine.
When you had stabilized and woken up, you looked to the side, finding flowers and a letter written on the dresser;
"If you're reading this, you probably woke up without me. I'm currently solving the problems with Sukuna's vessel, so I'll be back soon to see you.
Take care :)
Note: I left a chocolate hidden for you inside your pillow.
Satoru Gojo. ♡"
You smiled as you read the letter and decided to sleep a little longer to recover until he came back.
23:43 PM
When it was night, you woke up with the infirmary door opening and footsteps walking to your stretcher. And there he was, with that arrogant smile as always.
— Oh princess, are you finally awake? — He says, sitting on the chair next to your bed.
— If my eyes are open, I probably woke up. — Tsk... so ignorant... — Satoru laughs, twirling a strand of your hair with his finger. — So... how do you feel?
— Huh... well? I can't say, my body hurts but at the same time I feel quite energetic. — You say and he smiles.
— Well, it's to be expected, you were unconscious for 4 days.
— Wait... What?
— Yes, Shoko said you lost a lot of blood, you had several internal hemorrhages. You swallowed hard.
— And Suguru...? — You didn't want to ask that. Not when he was the one who hurt you so much. But gosh... you cared so much about him... you didn't have the courage to kill him and he took advantage of that.
— I killed him. — He says, without any joking tone in his voice. Had his efforts been in vain? You were so distracted by your thoughts that you barely noticed Satoru's voice stuck in his throat, but either way, he didn't want you to notice that.
— I... I'm sorry Toru...
— Nah, it's okay. — He says smiling, you knew he wasn't completely okay. Suguru was the only best friend Gojo had in his entire life, and now, he had been killed by himself, but of course, it was Satoru Gojo, he was always "fine". — I'll let you rest a little, I need to go after Director Yaga.
— Okay... — You answer as you watch him get up.
— See you later, princess.
— Wait!— You shout, grabbing the man's wrist and pulling him closer. With a quick movement, you place a long kiss on his forehead and whisper. — You're the strongest Satoru, but you're still human, remember that for me, okay?
Satoru was surprised, but with his bandage over his eyes, you could barely notice. He smiled, nodding.
— Good night, princess. — He places a loving kiss on your forehead, as a way of thanking you and leaves the infirmary.
You didn't know, but when he left the infirmary, he removed his blindfold to wipe the tears he shed.
Maybe today you won't see him cry, but who knows one day?
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vitalverstappen · 3 days
Text
Just Pretend - L. Norris
summary: a terrible night out in London may end up with you meeting someone new
pairing: Lando Norris x reader
warnings: drinking, a creepy guy flirting at the bar (not Lando), swearing
word count: 1.5k
a/n: i was going to post something completely different today but bc Lando won yesterday, i GUESS i'll post this against my will
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The club was the last place you wanted to be tonight. Going out was never your thing. If you were going to drink, you’d rather have a glass of wine on your couch than be in a stuffy club with sweaty, smelly bodies. 
And yet, you found yourself out in a club in London. Your friend group decided to take a vacation out exploring the cities of Europe - cafes by day and the clubs by night. The sticky floors and loud music was overwhelming. 
It didn’t help that some guy was trying to talk to you. In hindsight, you shouldn’t have gone up to the bar alone. It was supposed to be quick, simply getting yourself a new drink and then returning to your friend group. 
“So what’s a pretty girl like you doing here all alone?” The man asked 
“Going back to meet up with my friends, actually” You answered as you grabbed your drink from the bartender. You sidestepped to the left to avoid the guy, but he followed, blocking you from leaving.
A smirk danced across his face as you looked at him. “Oh come on, you don’t wanna stay for a chat?” 
“No, not really” You replied, your voice lacking any interest in the guy. He wasn’t ugly, just nowhere near your type, “Look, I need to get going” 
“Why don’t I come with you? Make sure you get to your friends safely” He suggested. Shit.
“No, that’s okay. I don’t think…” 
Panic filled your mind as you tried to think of an excuse to get this guy to go away. Your eyes scanned the room for any signs of your friends looking for you. They all were in a circle, dancing to the music blasting through the speakers. It took a second glance around the bar to find an escape route.
On the other side of the bar stood a guy around your age who looked nice enough. His hair was a curly mop that sat on top of his head and his smile shined brighter than anything else dim light. You made eye contact with the boy, to which you responded with a distressed look. His eyebrows furrowed as his eyes darted between you and the creep that was standing with you. 
“...I don’t think my boyfriend would appreciate that” You finally answered 
The man you were still stuck with scoffed “Boyfriend? I don’t see him anywhere” 
“He’s over there” You said, motioning in the general direction that the curly headed boy was in. 
Before the creep could say anything, you were able to push past him. You could feel his eyes piercing through you as you made your way through the crowd. As much as you wanted to go straight to your friends, you knew if you did, the guy would keep pestering you. 
As soon as you walked up to the curly headed boy, you rambled, “Look there’s this creepy guy who’s been bothering me all night and I have no idea where my friends are and I’m tired and I just wanna go home. I really would appreciate it if you helped me out and pretended to be my boyfriend and hopefully get the guy off of my dick.” The words came out of your mouth faster than you thought was humanly possible. 
Apparently, the guy thought so too. The lights were on, but no one was home as he yelled “What?!” 
You sighed before leaning over to him, your mouth only a few inches from his ear. “Just pretend you’re my boyfriend for a minute!” You yelled over the music 
The boy looked you up and down before shrugging and placing his arm around your waist. “Yeah, sure, which guy is it?” 
A thankful smile was plastered on your lips as you yelled back a thank you before motioning to the guy from before “The weirdo standing at the bar all by himself”
The curly headed boy nodded as he made eye contact with the guy at the bar. He watched for a few moments as you danced with the boy, letting the music take over temporarily. The smell of his cologne took over. It was expensive, notes of leather, but also lavender filled your senses. It was a scent you could get used to. 
Once you were sure that creepy guy was gone, you relaxed. 
“Thank you again. I don’t know what I would’ve done without you.” You said 
The boy shrugged “It’s nothing really. I’m just surprised you’re here alone” 
A laugh escaped your lips “I wasn’t when I first showed up. I was here with some friends, but honestly I have no idea where they went.” 
“Some friends they are” The guy said “You wanna hang with me and my crew?” 
“I don’t see why not” You shrugged 
As the boy, who you quickly learned was named Lando, led you to his friends, the two of you introduced yourselves. He told you he was a racing driver for a team you had never heard of, and that he travels a lot for work. 
“So you’ve never heard of Formula 1?” He asked, confused 
You shook your head, “No. Honestly, I’m not really into racing” 
“Well maybe I’ll have to teach you about it” He suggested as he pulled you in tighter, almost as if he was proud he had you. “So do you come around here often?” 
You shook your head “Honestly, I’ve never been”
“Really? Why are you here then?” He asked, his eyebrows furrowed just like they were minutes prior
You didn’t know if it was the alcohol in your system, or if Lando was that easy to talk to, but you explained the trip that your friend group was going on. His eyes were focused on you as you told him each city that your group was supposed to be going to.
“Well, if you need a tour guide around the UK, let me know. I’d love to show you my stomping grounds” He offered
A smirk danced across your face as you took out your phone “I might have to take your offer, though I’m gonna need your number first” 
“That would help” Lando chuckled as he took your phone, putting in his number. He then led you to a group of men and what seemed to be their significant others. 
“There you are Norris! We thought we lost you!” One of his friends said as the two of you walked up 
“Nah, just grabbing a drink, and saving someone from a creep” He said “This is y/n” 
Lando went down the line of his friends and their significant others. From what you could remember, there was Charles and Alexandra, Pierre and Kika, George and Carmen, and Oscar and Lily.
“So you trusted him to save you?” The girl you remembered as Kika asked, a playful smile on her lips 
“Yeah, it was a last resort kind of a thing” You joked back 
Suddenly, going out to the club didn’t seem so bad. The rest of the night was spent getting to know Lando and his friends, drinks and laughs overflowing. Now that the weirdo from earlier was long gone, you let the alcohol finally hit you. The rest of the group was also fairly drunk, shown through the giggles over nothing. 
Whether the two of you were dancing, grabbing another round, or just talking, you and Lando were inseparable. Whatever connection you had with Lando, you knew he could feel it too. He had to be touching you somehow the entire night, if it was the brush of his fingers against yours, or your body pressed up against his. 
The club slowly emptied as the night drew to a close, though neither of you wanted it to end. Lando’s friends were all long gone by the time the two of you left, but neither of you cared. He insisted on walking you to your hotel, ensuring that you made it back safe. 
“If you had told me this morning that I’d be helping a girl escape some freak, and that it would lead to one of the best nights I had in a while, I would not have believed you” Lando laughed 
“Neither would I” You agreed, a smile on your face “But I had the most amazing time”
You said your goodbyes, promising that this wouldn’t be the last time you saw each other. He had said he’d show you around London after all. Lando watched as you disappeared through the hotel lobby door, neither of you able to shake the feeling that it was the start of something beautiful.
“Thanks guys for leaving me, I really appreciated it” You said as you walked through the door to the suite you shared with your friends. 
All of the girls were gathered in the main room, debriefing their night. As you announced your arrival, jaws dropped and eyes widened. A chorus of “I'm sorry’s” and “We tried texting” filled the room. You could only smile. 
“I actually had a great time. You’ll never believe how it went” You said as you sat yourself down on the carpet, ready to retell the last few hours.
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fandomnerd9602 · 14 hours
Text
Touch Starved (🌶️)
Bambi!Wanda x Reader
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You thought it would be terrible but your doe’s heat cycle has been an exciting time for the both of you. It was allowing new avenues for you and her to explore your likes and dislikes.
You found out how much Wanda just melts when you take on a more commanding yet tender role. And she found out how much you like it when she talks a little dirty.
During one make out session in your office, she found herself saying something she never thought she’d express.
The two of you were on your couch. She was a squirming mess under you as you kissed her softly and let your hands wander her body.
She was a panting mess, desperate for your touch at the time. It just spilt out from her lips. “F—k me my buck! F—k me.” She gasped that such words left her lips.
You briefly got up to give her a bit of space. “D-do you want me to?” You asked her gently with a shrug, “because I’m free for the rest of the afternoon.”
Wanda giggled and leaped at you. In between fiery kisses and shared laughs, you made sure that your door was locked, the blinds were down, and you happily obeyed her command.
You and Wanda found a slight dip in your time together recently. You and her were planning a barbecue dinner for your family, Natasha, Pietro, Dr Stephen Strange and a couple other hybrids. The planning and organizing had really been cutting into your time together, which can be rather difficult considering that Wanda was still in the mid-range of her heat cycle.
Wanda was getting antsy and kind of anxious the day of the barbecue. Wanda found herself fidgeting, trying to distract her mind with meaningful conversations with Pietro and Natasha. But her eyes wandered over to see you playing with the boys, her heart just about fluttered out of her chest. And then came the heat rising between her thighs. The quivering in her lip returned.
Why did you have to look so good playing rounds of football with her boys? The way the sweat glistened off of your brow in the setting sunlight. The way the sweat made your shirt to your skin in just the right way and places. Wanda needed you to take her now.
Wanda looked around. Any excuse to get you alone. She needed just one excuse. And then she found it: the empty cooler. Wanda couldn’t help but smile a little.
Natasha walked up to her, “hey Wanda, we need more—“
“Drinks!” Your doe said excitedly before hushing herself, “I know. Detka and I are on it.”
And with that Wanda ran over to you and took your hand. “Detka, we’re out of drinks.”
“We have more in the…”
“Cellar. I know.” She whispered in your ear, “I need my big strong buck to help me downstairs” she gave you a seductive wink.
You carefully composed yourself and followed Wanda into your house and down to your basement. All the while, both of you were checking to be sure that no one had noticed or was following.
Wanda descended the stairs. You quietly locked the door behind you and followed her down.
You were barely one foot off the last step when Wanda lunged at you. Her hungry kisses were only matched by the ferocity on display as she began fiddling with your shorts in between kisses and moans.
“Need. You. Now” she playfully growls in your ear.
Your hands tug and pull at her sundress straps. She practically yanks her dress down and jumps up, wrapping her legs around your waist.
You balance her against the nearest shelf structure. Her antlers knock over a couple cans and boxes but neither of you care.
“Thank you, detka” she desperately whines as you go to work, pleasuring and pleasing the goddess wrapped around you. “Thank you! Oh thank you!”
You keep at your task, making her sight and moan. A few of the same sounds escape your lips as your two souls collide and mesh like they were never meant to part.
“D-detka” she began to say, your pace becoming erratic and a frenzy of love and lust mixed together. “I-I’m…I’m gonna—!”
Wanda’s eyes shut tight as waves of pleasure engulf you both. Wanda throws her head back exposing her beautiful porcelain neck. You hungrily kiss her pressure point, causing a bigger moan to escape from your perfect doe.
You lived to hear that wondrous sound. Her eyes locked with yours as the two of you shared a glimpse of eternity together.
“Thank you, my buck” she replies, her voice both husky and tired.
“Anything for you, my doe” you kiss her tenderly, allowing yourselves to forget the world and everything else for a few precious minutes.
Natasha snickered as you and Wanda came back up from the basement with extra packs of Gatorade and cold water in your arms. Pietro could barely contain his laughter too.
“So how are the refreshments?” That brother in law of yours laughs before trying to take another sip
“Just perfect” Wanda purrs. Pietro nearly spit up his drink.
Tags @lifespectator @olsenmyolsen @iiconicsfan25 @pinklawyerwinnerzonk @russianredassassin @revanshand @multi-fandom-enjoyer @aloneodi @texaswolf23 @julieromanoff
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slugghee · 13 hours
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Hello everyone. This is the second drawing post I've made in hopes of helping my friend Firas and his loved ones. The first one was not spread much. Please, even if you really can't don@te, reblog and share this post. Firas is on a tight schedule right now — he has been trying to raise enough money since mid-April. It is now late September. The deadline for his university fees could be as early as mid-October. This is his last chance to pay for his and his sister's university fees before it's too late and they are kicked out.
If you are new here, Firas (@firasmuhaisenn) and his sister, Nisreen, are 2nd-year medical students from Gaza currently studying in Egypt. Firas and his sister's upcoming university fees for the year cost $6000 USD in total. But Firas does not just have to deal with university fees — he needs money to evacuate his family. 3 adults and 3 minors, which costs $22,500 USD, a very reachable goal! As his family is trapped in Gaza, he is also in charge of sending his family money so they can at least get food daily. Not to mention the money he must spend on rent and food for himself. Firas has no source of income due to being a refugee and must rely on the charity of strangers to ever hope to see his family again! Can you imagine the stress! Firas is only EIGHTEEN!!
Thus, due to both the upcoming deadline and the constant drain of money for basic needs, Firas needs to raise money at a fast pace. He and Nisreen must complete their dreams of becoming doctors, and Firas's family must be evacuated to safety. Anything you can chip in makes a difference! Together, every small contribution can snowball into something amazing.
As of 9/25/2024, Firas's campaign has not received dona@tions in two days. Let's change that.
Firas's campaign is VERIFIED! He is vetted by @/90-ghost here.
I am not a vetter, but I have personally been chatting with Firas for a few months now, and others here on tumblr know him. Firas has provided his documents in his GoFundMe, and is willing to show additional documents to verify his identity.
Thank you so much for reading this far! Let's help Firas with all our might!!
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noobsoconfusing · 22 hours
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‘heartworm’_hamzahthefantastic
tired and sleepy conversations with your boyfriend who doesn’t shut the fuck up .
fluff, suggestive talk about martin, family ideas, cuddling in bed, established relationship.
>_<
one thing you noticed about your boyfriend is that he has many things inside his head, a raging –almost painful– need to tell you everything he is thinking about, and while you thank him for the trust, you can’t help but wonder if he analyses the things he says out loud before verbally vomiting them.
“y/n, are you awake?” hamzah’s voice came out soft and groggy, his low tone dragging in a whisper made you open your eyes almost so quick that it hurt.
“hmm, yes.” you replied, adjusting your sight to the dark room.
“do you…wanna talk?” he shifted on the bed, turning his body to face yours. he had a small smile as he looked at you. you felt warm.
the way his hair was messy, and his face so naturally familiar to you felt almost dreamy.
hamzah’s big sleepy eyes made your heart feel like a cooker bomb. weird comparison but to be honest you could almost feel the way it was going to explode anytime.
and god, you love him so much. unexplainably so damn much. he thought the same of you.
“cant sleep, huh?” you asked, getting closer to his body under the covers, but then you felt how one of your cats, probably blue, squealed. he was probably sound asleep between hamzah’s body and yourself, always looking for warmth. the protection of his cat parents
“mmm, nope, not really.” he sighed. “have so much stuff going on, you know? inside my mind, i mean.” he admitted, one of his hands travelled to your face, and he stroked your cheek only to feel some sort of contact. “so fuckin’ pretty, huh, you’re my pretty girl..”
you leaned into the touch like a needy pet, and he couldn’t help but smile, heart feeling full.
“whats inside your mind, hamzah?” you asked curiously.
although you were extremely tired and sleepy, hamzah always came first to you. soul intimacy was important, not only sex, and you wanted to know what was bothering him or keeping him awake at such indecent hours.
“you. always.” oh. “like, for real, y/n, and i don’t wanna sound obsessed, even though yeah, i am pretty much obsessed with you–,” he paused to swallow. your heart felt so heavy with a feeling you couldn’t quite describe, but only hamzah made you feel. “i am always thinking about you.”
to be reciprocated, to be seen. hamzah made you feel seen, as he pretty much matched your deep feelings for him. –oh, y/n, you match my freak!– his voice filled your head. so nice.
“i feel the same way” you bluntly said. “each day i feel like we have been dating for my whole life, because this crazy funny feeling never really goes away.” by that you meant, the exciting feeling of expectation and young love.
first love.
he giggled, low tone. “right! i know, it’s like, okay, like i feel like i am a kid in love, you know? all silly and nervous around you, but at the same time i feel like we have been married for ages!”
to be reciprocated, to be seen. to be in love.
“i love you, hamzah.” you admitted, your voice suddenly softer.
and he didn’t reply, instead, he lifted the covers all the way up till they were engulfing your bodies, the closeness was comforting, and his arms moved around your frame until a hug was crafted. so perfect and tender. his body was like a boiler, providing you of heat, almost like a heat pad for cramps… but man sized.
he looked at you, big round eyes silently speaking, hoping you hear them, –god i love you, i love you so much you’re my fucking world, i wanna spend my whole damn life by your side.– silent confession.
instead, he says;
“have you ever had tapeworms?” hamzah asks out of the blue.
you blink. blink twice. then three times. and then you sigh, remembering your boyfriend was just, well, just like that. it didn’t ruin the atmosphere though, you enjoyed… whatever the fuck he was trying to say.
“hmmm, i don’t think i have had tapeworms, no” you answer snuggling up to his bare chest.
hamzah hums. “it’s fine, me neither by the way, i just asked ‘cause whenever i think of you my heart feels like it’s got a tapeworm inside of it…”
silly, you thought. lovely.
“yeah. i think i know what you mean.”
“i think it’s in the way we match each other so fucking well, yeah? i never thought i could find a person that just… loves me… for what i am…” he said and you felt your heart skip a beat.
your eyebrows furrowed. “elaborate.”
“for instance, you’re my friend, but also my girlfriend, but also my wife, but also my best friend, and not only that, you’re also like, my life partner, you know?”
ugh, stupid fucking feelings. you felt so deeply about hamzah that your heart felt like it could burst out anytime.
“hey, i love you so much it’s almost overwhelming.” you admitted, melting into his touch. “for so long i thought nobody would ever notice me or listen to me or even just, be my friend. or try to take the time to understand me…” your voice lowered at the end of your sentence.
he groaned at how close you were. satisfaction, of course.
“you’re so beautiful, y/n.” he kissed the top of your head. “like, i also thought that martin would be my only friend forever, as scary as it sounds.” he laughed and you did too.
“hey! martin’s nice!” you defended your friend.
“i mean yeah, i love him too, but it’s different. not in the way i love you, and i know he doesn’t love me in the way he loves mandy.” he explained.
“yeah, i know.” you laughed sleepily, as you leaned onto hamzah’s body. it helped a ton that he slept shirtless because you liked the raw closeness.
“martin is cool, but if i had never met you, i would have blue balls and an empty heart!”
“and gay allegations, still.” you added, laughing.
“but most importantly blue balls..” hamzah said serious, with a sigh.
“huh?!”
“i can’t fuck martin. i can’t make love to martin, though, just think about it.”
“dude…” you said, trying not to burst out laughing out loud.
“i have thought about it, but only before meeting you, it’s just weird!” hamzah explained, with a nervous smile on his face.
“you don’t have to think about that, hamzah!” a smile creeped up on your lips. an awkward one.
“right, i know.” he defended himself-, “i don’t think about it anymore, i was just a lonely man before you, though.” ah, you knew that.
every time they could, mandy and martin made sure to tell you how much of a loner miserable man hamzah was. a painfully single dude. even the slushies would be constantly commenting jokes about it.
“because you’re weird that’s why…” you joked and he clicked his tongue. “that’s why i love you”
“you know, before you; it was my hand, lotion, tissues and me against the world.” he listed as if it was a great accomplishment.
as if it was something super fucking serious. to be fair, it was very serious to him.
“no video?” you joked. it felt so nice and genuine to talk about silly stuff like this with your man.
he stopped to think for a second. “nah, just my imagination. always imagined you though, even before meeting you i always imagined someone like you.” he kissed your forehead.
“wow, how romantic, it’s almost as if you’re not talking about beating your meat.”
as you both comfortably joked and laughed, a nice silence filled the room.
hamzah pulled you closer, which you thought was physically impossible, but still, your body thanked his devotion for physical affection.
his low voice broke the silence.
“y/n…”
“yes, hamzah?”
he sighed, holding your waist close to his own. you could feel him, feel him merging with your body, but it was nice, not really anything more than intimacy.
“i can’t wait to have a family with you.” he said, the weight of the confession leaving his chest felt so good.
your eyes opened wide. and you stuttered to reply.
“we are a family.” you said.
the cats, him, you. yeah, a family as god intended, right? but still, you knew what he meant. and you wanted it too.
“do you think we’ll be good parents?” he asked, the tone in his voice indicating he was being honest, being hopeful. he hoped for you to say yes so badly.
you thought for a moment…
“i think we’ll be okay, hamzah.” yeah.
“we’ll be okay, love.” he said, but it was almost as if he was trying to reassure himself.
hamzah wanted a big family, and he liked thinking about caring for the little humans you’d create together.
and the room filled with silence yet again, as you heard his calm breathing, you realised he had fallen asleep. the comfort of his embrace made you fall asleep as well.
hamzah felt so safe with you, so understood. never judged at all. he said weird stuff, but you always had a smile on your face. never grossed out by him, never angry, always loving.
it was nice. to be reciprocated, to be seen.
the heartworm inside his heart wiggled happy, eating his flesh and leaving a trace of only you.
>_<
hope u liked this. i did. heh.
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soberpluto · 3 days
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Examining Neptune's Spell
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Apologies for not being here after so much time, but now I'm back and very thrilled to share this with you all! I'm hopeful many can find this helpful.
Unnecesary context aside, just recently I was having a long and deep conversation with a friend of mine about my semi-recurring mini existential crises. After hearing me patiently, with the dear intention of making me realize I was drowning in my tiny glass of water, he simply (and brilliantly) replied:
"I think you're problem is that you have unrealistic expectations about yourself."
Any attempt to blurt out in self-defense ceased instantly because of how deep these words sunk in my mind. I stared into the wall before for me and felt how the missing puzzle piece finally dropped into the perfect spot. Obviously, the thought of having my sun in Cancer and Neptune in almost exact opposition popped inside, and it took a WHOLE new dimmension. How could this statement not be true?! OF COURSE he was right! It's not that I wasn't told that before or haven't read about it multiple times in my astrology studies, but the truth is, (a very Neptunian thing now that I think about it) I didn't believe it quite applied to me. Because I don't like to feel mediocre and because I think of myself as a spiritual and highly self-aware woman, I was convinced that holding myself to "unrealistic standards" was definitely NOT the reason that triggered me to want fleed to a desert islands at times when reality felt like too much. It was bitterly humorous when I realized I evidently missed the fact that Neptune was making a hell of a job doing what he does best: casting its spells of illusion and glittery distorted beliefs about how things were "supposed to be" in a surprisingly unadverted way into my life. I was truly relieved to actually understand (or accept, better said) why trying to have a simple and happy life seemed too tricky at times. It all made sense.
Now, let me introduce Neptune, if you happen to be unacquainted.
Neptune in astrology is like the ultimate dream weaver, spinning a web of intuition, imagination, and mystery. It’s the planet of all things ethereal, where reality gets a little blurry, and you’re invited to dive into the deep end of fantasy, spirituality, and idealism. Neptune whispers, "What if?" and suddenly, we're seeing the world through a kaleidoscope of possibilities, but a "little" foggy on the details. We're all influenced by Neptune one way or another, but when it touches personal planets or points in our charts, it’s like life hands us a pair of customized rose-colored glasses, but the prescription is way off. Suddenly, everything feels a bit magical, like we're starring in your own fairytale, except the castle is made of mist, the prince might just be a mirage, and that enchanted forest? It’s actually a parking lot.
But why bother making us feel loony? On a more serious note, our master illusionist possesses the higher purpose of awakening our connection to something greater than the everyday grind. It gently pulls us out of the rigid boundaries of reality and whispers, "There’s more to life than meets the eye." It invites us to explore the depths of our imagination, spirituality, and compassion, blurring the lines between self and universe. The illusions it creates are really a nudge to dissolve our ego’s grip, helping us see beyond the material and embrace a higher sense of love, creativity, and unity with the cosmos.
As inspiring and touching as it sounds, the catch is that fulfilling Neptune’s mission can feel like chasing fog—just when we think we’ve got a handle on it, it slips through our fingers. Neptune wants us to transcend reality and connect with the divine, but let’s be real: that’s not exactly a day-to-day, grocery-list-friendly goal. For someone with heavy Neptune influence, this pursuit of higher meaning can be disorienting, leaving them feeling lost in a sea of "what ifs" and "maybes." And thanks to its grandeur idealism, it can push people to be hypersensitive, highly fearful of failure and completely inaccurate with what they may achieve in a day, let alone a lifetime!
For a Neptunian, the intuitive desire to be flawless and sufficient does not come from wordly expectations, but from a place of soulful calling that more often unconsciously than consciously tells them they're limitless beings living in a limited reality. And this is exactly the greatest challenge of all: to accept that the truth must be known while respecting the illusion, just as a spiritual teacher Michael Mirdad states.
That said, you can imagine what happens when mystical and whimsical Neptune gets cozy with your personal planets. Let's see in detail how it sprinkles its glitter them:
Sun
Soft Aspects: With soft aspects, your Sun is shining brighter than ever! Neptune sprinkles fairy dust on your creativity and confidence, making you feel like a superstar in your own musical. It’s all about embracing your spiritual side and believing that you can conquer the world—cape optional!
Hard Aspects: You’re the artist of your own identity, but the canvas keeps shifting. One day you’re an astronaut, the next day you’re a poet, and by the end of the week, you’re contemplating becoming a full-time mystic. Neptune tells you, "Be everything," but sometimes that just leaves you wondering, "Who am I, really?"
Moon
Soft Aspects: Your emotions flow like a gentle river, and you’re tuned in to everyone’s feelings like a super empath (you could be a cool wizard/witch or clairvoyant!). Neptune wraps you in a cozy blanket of intuition, making heartfelt connections feel like a warm hug from the universe. Cue the happy tears!
Hard Aspects: Enter the emotional whirlpool! Neptune can stir up your feelings like a cosmic blender, leading to mood swings and a general sense of overwhelm. You might find yourself daydreaming your way through real-life emotions, and good luck figuring out what you actually feel!
Mercury
Soft Aspects: With Neptune’s gentle nudge, your thoughts become a beautiful symphony! Communication flows like honey, and you’re bursting with creative ideas. It’s a fantastic time for writing, brainstorming, or chatting about all things magical and dreamy! You could be a music lover, a great singer or a romantic poet.
Hard Aspects: But when Neptune goes rogue, it’s like trying to read a recipe in a funhouse—everything’s upside down! Your thoughts get scattered, and communication feels like a game of telephone gone wrong. Get ready for misunderstandings and the occasional “Wait, what did you just say?” This aspect looks very similar to a Piscean or Sagittarian Mercury, a common link to ADHD.
Venus
Soft Aspects: Love is in the air! Neptune turns your romantic life into a whimsical fairy tale, where everything feels enchanting. Your heart opens wide, and connections deepen, making even the smallest moments feel like a scene from a rom-com.
Hard Aspects: But hold on! Neptune might have you wearing those rose-colored glasses a bit too tightly. You might find yourself idealizing partners or being swept away by fantasies, only to crash back to reality when things don’t match your dreamy expectations. Ouch!
Mars
Soft Aspects: With Neptune in your corner, your drive becomes a creative spark! You’re ready to take action with a burst of inspiration, making you feel like a superhero on a mission. Time to tackle those goals with flair and imagination!
Hard Aspects: When Neptune throws in a twist, it’s like trying to run through quicksand. Your motivation might wane, leaving you confused about where to focus your energy. It’s a cosmic case of “I had a plan… what was it again?”
To wrap it up after such long post, living with Neptune’s influence means you’ve got a backstage pass to the land of dreams, creativity, and big feelings. But it also means you might find yourself getting tangled up in illusions, setting sky-high standards that real life simply can’t meet. So when Neptune touches your personal planets, just remember: it's okay to dream big, but keep a little reality check in your back pocket. You can chase those rainbows, but don’t forget to pack an umbrella for when they dissolve into rain.
Thanks so much for reading, love you! 🥰
Written by @soberpluto
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n0tamused · 1 day
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Have you by any chance seen someone on Twitter posting a translated version of Xiangli Yao's daily schedule? How about writing something like what his schedule would be with the reader (already in a relationship) maybe on a day off? Something like: 8:00 AM - get up and start day 10:00-12:00 AM snuggled in bed with y/n as a result. Or - 4:00 PM - prosthetic maintenance. ambushed from behind. (Imagine nuzzling him from behind while he tinkers with his hand 🥺) Something like a bunch of small drabbles in 1 work? I guess finding someone to write for him awakened something in my brain, I'msorry.
A/n: I have heard of this schedule but tbh I didn't see it myself before I got this request lol, I really find the idea sweet so I hope I did it justice! And no need to apologize, I am happy to write for Xangli Yao
Contents: Xiangli Yao x GN!Reader, fluff, short drabbles, established relationship not proofread
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Saturday:
08:30 - Wake up
It’s been many years since Xiangli Yao has practiced this continuous cycle of waking up at certain times, to the point he did not need an alarm clock anymore. It was 8:14 when he came to his senses, morning light sleeping through the blinds and softly caressing his eyelids to open. He turns away from them, shifting sluggishly underneath the blankets, knowing that work wasn’t waiting on him today. 
He is greeted by your sleeping face, relaxed and soft as the few spots of light from the blinds danced over your cheeks and lips. The light didn’t seem to disturb you, something he was thankful for as he shuffled closer and wrapped his good arm around you, bringing you closer to his warmth as he nuzzled his nose into the top of your head, breathing in your scent as your hair tickled his skin. He feels you mold into his shape, your sleep heavy arm going underneath his and over his side, the blanket keeping your shared warmth trapped, shielding you from the chilly morning.
09:30 - make breakfast with my beloved :) 
Well, it may have been 9:10 by the time you both willed yourself to leave the comforts of eachothers arms. It was hunger that pulled you both from bed, stumbling into the bathroom. Xiangli Yao was next to you as you washed your face while he brushed his teeth. He handed you your toothbrush after you blindly found the towel next to the sink and brushed your face dry. 
Although he had gotten used to being the one to prepare breakfast for both of you during workdays, the weekends did allow more time, and so Yao did try to listen to you more when you said you wanted to help or do more of the work since you don’t usually get the chance to do so. He did convince you some times before, letting you so simply sit aside and look pretty while he whips you up your favorite, but today wasn’t that day. You woke up with more energy and a craving for good quality time and to get your hands busy.
What ends up happening is a table full of food, a big but balanced breakfast of veggies and fruit and needed protein. While you were setting up the table, Xiangli Yao poured you both the juice you made the weekend. He may not think about it too often, but he always feels like the richest man in the world when he shares mornings like these with you.
13:00 - go to the market, restock groceries
His prosthetic arm is holding the basket while the fingers of his other hand are intertwined with yours. Xiangli Yao was yet to become truly used to these public displays of affection, but he never disliked them. The thing was that such little acts of affection flustered him so much at first and he’d rather not catch someone ogling him while his cheeks are red as the tomatoes you were looking at now. He was used to it, he tells himself as he slowly lets your fingers slip from his hold when you say you can use some of the tomatoes. He remembers you mentioning a recipe some time ago that required a good amount of tomatoes. He helps you pick out the best ones and he adds it to the basket after the purchase is done. Although today’s shopping trip ended with more bags than either of you expected, Xiangli Yao vehemently refused to  allow you to carry any of the bags.
You ended up stopping at the local dessert shop, purchasing a few sweet goods for home. You mentioned how the chocolate cake he got looked oddly similar to Xiang-LEE. Now he couldn’t unsee it..
16:00 - prosthetic maintenance(p.s. keep your back guarded!)
How oddly homely it felt to have your arms around him while he tinkered away on his mechanical arm..
Although at first you only observed him from the doorway, he chose to skillfully ignore you when you began to sneak closer, almost as if he couldn’t see you from the corner of his eye. 
You knew he knew too, but it's a game you both chose to play every evening when the sun began to lean in to kiss the mountains. 
You hum as you put your chin on top of his head, peering down at the assortment of open wires and metal plating scattered about on the table. There's a screwdriver in his good hand, and he's clearly doing something, but you're unsure what. Perhaps you'd ask one day, tell him to explain how his arm really works, but that is not today.
He feels you leaning in and kissing his cheek and then his temple.
“The meal is soon to be done. Don't keep me waiting all alone at the table, Xiangli Yao”
19:00 - Free activities 
Xiangli Yao can't help the chuckle that escapes him as he witnesses your scowl and furrowed brows, and all for the little board game with black and white pieces. You've won the round from last night and he deemed it appropriate to ask for a rematch, although he only wished to make you blow off the steam. You've been rather stressed this week, perhaps some back and forth of the game could allow a reprieve.
“You've been thinking about your next move for quite some time now, my love…” he tries, a smile plastered on his lips, both amused and sympathetic.
“...I got it…shh” you return, pushing your chin into the heel of your palm. He hums in response, and another few heartbeats of silence pass before he sees your face light up, as if a star had whispered the next act into your ear. Your fingers deftly move across the board and move your piece across the checkerboard.
“Checkmate!” 
He laughs, his chest shaking with joy as you beam at him. You beat him. Again.
22:30 - bedtime
Mornings are where Xiangli Yao thrives. He is a morning person to the last bone in his body and on work days it is not rare for him to rise before you and his alarm, but they don’t bring him nearly as much relief and joy as bedtime does. Your sleepy face as you go to brush your teeth and change into your bedwear always has his heart softening, his own movements slowing down as his entire body yawns for the comforts of the mattress and comfortable blankets.
He is sitting at the edge of the bed, tinkering with his prosthetic arm for the last time and setting it aside on the table right next to his side of the bed. His prosthetic is cold and rather uncomfortable to sleep with for both of you. From behind he hears you exiting the bathroom and the sound of your bare feet against the floor hurrying up has him turning around to see how you crash into the bed, your face buried into your pillow with a low groan, a breath of relief as weight is taken off your feet.
He shuffles, telling you to get under the blankets while he turns off the lights. Once he remembered you both joking about being afraid of the dark, and although it was all just a joke - Xiangli Yao has been the one to turn off the lights since then. 
He hums as he returns, sliding under the blankets and finding the warmth of your body with searching fingers, pulling himself closer until he was wrapped around you. He buries his nose into your hair, inhaling your scent before laying a lingering kiss to your cheek, bidding you goodnight. 
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Ⓒ n0tamused. Do not repost, translate, edit, and/or copy any of my works. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.
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crimsonhydrangeavn · 3 days
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(For those wondering, Rita's Birthday is actually September 19th. )
Ironically enough, the reason why I wasn't able to post something on her birthday was because I was swamped with work thanks to an unrealistic deadline.
But hey, better late than never right?
As an apology to Rita and to you all, I wrote a "little" birthday story detailing how her "Birthday Cookies" came to be!
It was almost two weeks before the date when you found out Rita's birthday was coming up.
It was purely unintentional. You see, you spotted her open planner when she asked you to grab something off of her desk. Most of the days on her calendar had a note or two written in black text, however September 19th was the only exception. She had used a cute little birthday sticker that, you presumed, came with the planner.
At the time you made a mental note of it before fetching her the document she requested and getting back to work. However, that was the moment you knew you wanted to do something special for her. Like you, she had recently moved to the island and had really only focused on getting the bookstore up and running before getting consumed with work. From what you had seen she hadn't really socialized much outside of work, so the chances of her actually having birthday plans were slim.
However you intended to fix that! After all, she was the best boss you had ever had. She was kind, patient, hardworking, responsible, understanding, and made it a point to check in on how you were doing often. It was hard NOT to want to do something special for her given just how much you appreciated her.
During the following two weeks you made it your mission to learn as much as possible about her preferences. You didn't want to outright ask her, otherwise it would be too obvious. So, you would make sure to subtly bring it up with customers whenever Rita was within earshot so she would, hopefully, join in on the conversation, or you would be able to naturally follow up on the topic later that day.
Admittedly it was a pretty round about way of collecting information, but you really wanted to make sure your plans were a complete and total surprise
You also invited her out to the local bakery one day during lunch when she seemed to have a particularly rough day dealing with a bunch of annoying teenagers. It was then and there you had learned that she actually hated cake.
Marcelo, who was in ear shot when she made the comment, couldn't help himself and asked why.  According to her, she was never a fan of the "cakey" texture and she HATED frosting. Marcelo couldn't hide his surprise and began listing a variety of cakes, most of which you had never even heard from before. However Rita had not only tried all of them, but disliked each and every one.
Poor Marcelo had to return to work defeated while Rita and yourself remained seated sipping on your respective drinks.
" If not cakes, cupcakes, or pastries, then what kind of sweets do you like?" You questioned, praying that she would give you something, anything, to work with.
She took a sip of her black coffee as she considered your question. After a few beats she finally answered.
" Chocolate chip cookies."
" Really?" You questioned, surprised by the simplicity.
" I know, I know, It's a pretty basic answer... but I can't help it. It's always been a bit of a comfort food for me. Nothing beats a warm freshly baked chocolate chip cookie. " She paused for a moment before continuing, a soft wistful expression on her face.
"Growing up my grandma would make them for us on Sundays and... Well, it was the highlight of my week." She answered with a warm smile as she glanced down at her coffee.
" I mean, I can't really blame you. After all chocolate chips cookies are a classic for a reason." You commented with a smile, only to earn a gentle and affectionate look from the woman before you.
Fast forward a week later and you and a handful of coworkers quietly arrived at work nearly an hour early. Thankfully you had a key to the back door and was able to slip in without much effort. You all spent the next hour quietly decorating the break room without alerting Rita of your presence.
So when she finally descended the stairs an hour later, she was surprised to find you all standing in the dimly lit break room shouting " HAPPY BIRTHDAY RITA!"
She nearly fell down the stairs in shock as she stared at all of you wide eyed.
" W-what on earth...?"
It was then you stepped forward with a wide grin, pleased that your birthday surprise for Rita had been a success.
Well, at least the surprise part was anyway.
" It's your birthday isn't it? We wanted to do something to celebrate! Now why don't you sit down? We have a few surprises up our sleeves." You said with a smile as you grabbed her arm and gently led her over to the couch to sit down.
It was then all of your coworkers presented their gifts and cards to her, thanking her for being such a great boss and how they'll miss her once they returned home for the winter. Fortunately Rita had recovered from the shock by then and politely thanked them all, chuckling along and having a wonderful time.
Once everyone else had given her their gifts, you were up to bat.
" There's one more surprise, so make sure to close your eyes okay?" You said with a smile.
Rita raised a brow before doing as she was told, a playful smirk on her lips. " Oh? What's next? A piñata?" She teased gaining a few chuckles out of your coworkers.
You slipped into her office where you had hidden away a plate of freshly baked cookies you had made earlier that morning. You popped them into the microwave one of your coworkers had relocated to Rita's office right before you started decorating.
Once they were rewarmed, you placed a little candle in the center cookie, thankful that the warm temperature allowed it to stick.
Once they were ready you finally headed out to Rita, carrying the plate of cookies. Placing the plate on the coffee table in front of her you told her to open her eyes before singing happy birthday as your coworkers joined in.
When Rita's eyes finally opened she was surprised by the lack of cake, only for her features to soften considerably once she realized why you of all people had given her cookies instead of a cake. Your coworkers had initially teased you for your choice, however after seeing her tearful and grateful reaction, it was clear that you had made the right decision.
The rest of the gathering went smoothly and despite it all, you all were still able to open up on time. Then most of your coworkers ended up leaving once the festivities were over since it was technically their days off.
It wasn't until nearly everyone had cleared out or gone to the front that Rita finally approached you.
" You know Y/N... I've never gotten birthday cookies instead of cake before." She commented playfully as her eyes shined with affection and mirth as she looked over at you.
" I know I know, an unconventional decision... You have no idea how much everyone roasted me once they realized what I brought instead of a cake." You chuckled remembering their reactions.
"but... I wanted to make sure the birthday girl enjoyed her birthday treat." You met her gentle gaze, a small knowing on your lips.
"Well, I'd say she more than just enjoyed it. Thanks Y/N. This is one of the best birthdays I've had in a really long time." And with that, she wrapped her arms around you in an incredibly warm and thankful embrace.
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snowydoesitall · 2 days
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✨movie night with the hidden inventory gc✨
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*:・゚✧cast: gojo, geto, shoko, utahime, nanami, and haibara
✧summary: a one shot of the hidden inventory friend group’s movie night
♡a/n: i’m back!!! guys please appreciate my efforts with this one this took me several attempts to post and way longer than usual to write
ྀིwarnings: language; gojo and geto are their own warnings atp; no beta we die like suguru’s tea mug
after the discussion regarding which movie they were planning to watch that night had ended, you wrapped up whatever homework you had left before changing into more comfortable clothes and heading to shoko’s dorm a bit early to help her set up.
upon arriving, you find that utahime had the same idea as she was currently standing by the microwave waiting for a bag of popcorn to finish cooking.
shoko was at her laptop, looking perplexed, so you walked over to her to see if she needed help.
“i’ve been trying to get into our disney+ account so i can stream cars onto the tv, but it keeps saying that the password is incorrect”, she explains. “did gojo change the password again?”
“i don’t think so…did you put the question mark at the end?”
shoko paused for a moment before typing something into the password bar. sure enough, the app finally let her in.
she stared at her laptop in disbelief for a solid minute before responding.
“huh, that seemed to do it. thanks.”
you nodded, chuckling lightly, before walking over to utahime, who was microwaving what appeared to be the fifth bag of popcorn.
“damn, do we really need that much popcorn?”, you asked.
“if it were just us girls i would’ve stopped at three or four. but there’s going to be seven of us, and you know how gojo is with snacks”, she responded.
“good point.”
the two of you continued to chat for a bit, shoko joining in once she finished setting up the movie.
eventually, the boys finally showed up with a couple snacks as well as a few bottles of soda, which they set on the counter.
“alright, that’s everyone. shall we start the movie?”, shoko asked.
everyone agreed, grabbing a couple snacks and drinks before settling themselves on either the couch or the floor in front of the tv as shoko presses play on the remote to behind the movie.
as the movie played on, the room was filled with all sorts of chaos. for starters, gojo would not stop quoting lines from the movie, which, while slightly annoying, was tolerable. eventually haibara joined in for a bit, seeing as he’d watched that movie at least a hundred times.
it eventually got tiring though, especially once gojo started quoting lines from completely different movies, and so geto ended up lightly tapping him on the shoulder to get him to stop.
speaking of those two, once gojo’s focus had shifted to his boyfriend, the two of them were practically glued to each other with how close they were. this didn’t exactly surprise you, since gojo is the king of being clingy, especially around geto, and the latter of the two never minded it despite not being super clingy himself.
“alright, you two need to either get a room or stop making out on my floor, because some of us are trying to watch the god damn movie”, shoko complained after about ten minutes of their behavior.
“i mean i’m not opposed to- ow!”
whatever gojo was planning to say next was cut off by you smacking him from the couch.
“making out during a disney movie is crazy, you two”, you stated.
“fair point”, geto responded, lightly shoving gojo off his lap, to the latter’s dismay.
nonetheless, the two of them settled down after a while, so your attention shifted back to the movie.
about halfway through, you started feeling tired, which made sense seeing as it was getting kind of late and you’d had a pretty long day. all the same, you did your best to stay awake, as things in the movie were starting to get real interesting.
you reached into one of the popcorn bowls to grab a few pieces to keep yourself awake. in doing so, your hand brushed against another hand, causing you to pause.
you glanced at nanami, who had reached into the popcorn bowl at the same time you did. the two of you sat there for a moment, neither one lifting your hands from the bowl.
after what seemed like a couple minutes, you finally lifted your hand out of the bowl, a few pieces in your hand.
“looks like we had the same idea”, you remarked with a laugh, popping a piece of popcorn into your mouth.
“looks like it”, nanami responded, a small smile forming on his face as he too grabbed a few pieces of popcorn.
you heard a cough, so you turned to see utahime staring at the two of you, a knowing smile on her face. you stared back at her, hinting for her to back off.
eventually, towards the end of the movie, you were getting more and more tired, to the point where even popcorn wasn’t enough to keep you awake. the last thing you remember before dozing off was the start of the final race.
you woke up slowly to someone gently shaking you awake.
“hey guys, time to wake up, movie just ended”, haibara stated.
you took a glimpse of your surroundings, noticing that the nearly-empty bowl of popcorn had now toppled onto the floor, spilling a few kernels. you then noticed that you’d fallen asleep leaning against nanami, who in turn had fallen asleep against the armrest of the couch.
haibara was standing in front of the two of you, currently trying to wake up nanami, who was still sound asleep against the armrest. you sat up quickly, hoping that he hadn’t noticed you dozing off on him, but you figured he must’ve since the second you got up was when he finally woke up, slightly dazed and tense as he glanced around the room, presumably to find where you’d gone.
once he noticed you sitting next to him, he let out a sigh of relief, looking more relaxed.
“you okay, man?”, haibara asked, looking slightly confused.
nanami turned to face the brown-haired boy, looking as if he’d just noticed his presence.
“oh, sorry…i’m fine, just…it’s nothing.”
you and haibara looked at him suspiciously, feeling that it wasn’t just “nothing”, but didn’t pry.
“i’m fine, you two. seriously.”
you opened your mouth to say something, but before you could, you heard shoko calling for the three of you.
“hey! are you two sleepyhead lovers and hai going to help me clean up or what?”
“the WHAT?”, you exclaimed, looking at shoko with an mixed expression of shock and confusion all at once. meanwhile, haibara was looking like he was trying not to laugh while nanami was awkwardly looking around the room, trying to avoid eye contact, a twinge of pink starting to show on his face.
“nothing! don’t worry about it, now come help us clean up!”
you signed, knowing you weren’t going to get a legitimate answer from her, at least not right now, so you got up from the couch and started cleaning up, the other two boys following suit.
but as you were clearing up the kitchen, you couldn’t help but think about what shoko said.
lovers?, you thought to yourself. but how could that be? we’re just friends, after all…
but then you started to look more into it, moments of the night playing through your mind. the small smile he gave you when your hand brushed against his earlier, the way neither of you pulled away immediately, his slight blush at shoko’s jab at the two of you, the way he rose up from his sleep the second he no longer felt your presence, all of it.
the more and more you thought about it, the more and more you realized that perhaps the other girls had a point.
“you okay?”
you snapped back into reality as you turned to face nanami, who was looking at you with concern.
“yeah, i’m fine, just…tired”, you tell him, giving him a reassuring smile.
you weren’t entirely sure if nanami believed you, but he didn’t show it if he didn’t.
“i see. anyway, the others are planning to crash here for the night. the cleaning’s pretty much done if you wanted to head to bed.”
sleep did sound pretty nice right then and there, so you nodded.
“yeah, that might be a good idea, it is pretty late…”
the two of you headed back to the living room space. nanami returned to his spot on shoko’s couch, leaning against the armrest, while you sat next to him and tried to fall asleep sitting upwards, not wanting to invade his personal space nor accidentally wake up haibara, who had taken up the other side of the couch.
“there’s no way that’s comfortable”, nanami remarked as he noticed your attempts.
“sorry, didn’t want to intrude or anything”, you replied.
“i didn’t mind the first time, why would i mind now?”, he asked. “make yourself comfortable. i promise i don’t mind.”
with that, you hesitantly went back to leaning against nanami, finding him a lot more comfortable than trying to sleep sitting up.
before long, you were finally starting to fall asleep. you felt an arm gently wrap itself around you, and while you certainly didn’t expect it, you didn’t try to pull away, nor did you feel uncomfortable. instead, you felt at ease, like this was natural, almost.
by the time sleep came to take you away for the night, you were pretty certain that nanami had some sort of feelings for you.
hell, at this point, you were starting to think that you did, too.
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oh god this ended up longer than i expected😭
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ghouldtime · 2 days
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*slides into the DMS*
S O. What does social anxiety for König look like through your fantastic characterization then? 👀
(Love your Alone operator series btw. Got me on the edge of my seat with each chapter!!)
(Thank you!! 💚💚💚 I'm so glad you're enjoying :D you all have been so so sweet with it and Im over the MOON so many people have liked it)
To answer this question I'm going to have to be a biiig yapper and explain why I think of him the way I do
Going to say this to start, but I'm going with the true fact that König is indeed diagnosed with social anxiety - anything else I'm saying is based off of my personal interpretation of how he acts in game as a disclaimer
I'm also going to state that personally, the König I write is in his lower to mid 40's. Sorry not sorry, I don't see him as a young dude. Especially not when it's pretty much agreed upon that he's a colonel. So he's had a SIGNIFICANT amount of life experience, and a significant amount of time to work on himself and have introspection.
To me, it makes the most sense that he was diagnosed with social anxiety earlier on in his childhood since it was significantly more obvious when he was younger. Something that severe wasn't unnoticed by those around him because some of them did care about him. It's also stated he's suffered from severe social anxiety throughout his life so that's how I took it.
I personally go with he grew up in a more rural town in his homeland of Austria, which meant there weren't exactly others around during the first few years. "Go play with the neighbors kids" didn't really work when there weren't neighbors around. It was mainly him and his parents and an occasional relative over.
What could be brushed off as initial shyness clearly couldn't be anymore when he finally was enrolled in school.
Even on the first day when it's "introduce yourself to everyone", he fucked that up so monumentally it'll be engraved forever in his hall of shameful memories that he thinks about late at night. School was an utter nightmare, quite frankly, from moment one. The whole situation was too much, too stressful, and too different from the life he had at home. He flat out refused to get up and present in front of the class and wouldn't talk in group projects just for the fear of embarrassing himself. At that time, he was hitting all the indicators for social anxiety like they're the targets he shoots at today.
He missed out on a lot of interaction with other kids initially because of how awkward he was - and having any form of anxiety never helps in social situations. Talking to others wasn't something that came naturally and his own panic amplified it tenfold. Most times, he'd either pretend he didn't hear them, avoid them, or stray as far to the edge of the group as possible to avoid it. Unfortunately this made him an easy target because kids are RUTHLESS and turned him into even more outcast as well which only worsened it.
School always sucked for him due to that, despite the fact that he was a smart kid. No amount of smarts could save you from social persecution when you had nearly no social skills to boot. [ side note but I'm dying on the hill that he's incredibly intelligent and has a bachelors degree (at the very least)].
His parents kept him in therapy to help him manage because without it, he'd be back at square one refusing to go to school and faking a cold just to get out of it. And of course, therapy is a very important tool when it comes to healing, coping, and managing severe mental disorders. The whole reason why he doesn't show such bad anxiety anymore is because he kept the skills he learned and applies them so much that it becomes his second nature.
He's had at least 35 years of this, he's good enough to mask and to keep up his facade.
Another part of why he doesn't show it nearly as much is because he joined the military and was thrown through the wringer with it. Being bullied for so long was a major motivator for joining in the first place, as he needed something to get away from the peers who tormented him so and he needed a new life where he wasn't known as target #1. But he ALSO wanted to gain actual confidence and more certainty in himself.
Joining the military really means you're not left with such things as many choices when it comes to anxiety in social situations. You're forced into quarters with others, have to work side-by-side, do nearly everything together, so on and so forth. He knew that going in but at that point for him it was like extreme exposure therapy, the last step he needed to really put everything he learned in therapy to work.
That doesn't mean he didn't suffer or loved it. No, it was terrible, intense, and nerve-wracking. But he wouldn't have done it otherwise if he didn't want that. Being in the military didn't give him the leeway to avoid what made him anxious, it taught him to face it head on and fight.
Now that he's up there in age and has considerable more experience (and leeway with having a higher rank), the ways he expresses it [look at me finally answering the question] are more subtle.
On the field, you're likely not going to notice it. Because that's him turning the little auto pilot switch in his mind to on when he has a job. The job is his focus and everything has been so engrained in his mind that it's muscle memory. He's, quite frankly, focused on not dying and getting any job done over himself. The joking you often hear him do and taunting alike is part of how he's expressing the confidence he feels when he's in his element, when he KNOWS what he is doing.
If you look closely or approach him off the field, however, it's another story. He usually tenses or straightens himself out when people approach and will hold that until they leave (unless they're someone who he truly knows). Many assume that's a taught habit of the military, but that's only half-true. He did that before then.
Unlike when he's working, he doesn't have a guide or things he knows he has to do in a specific order to best ensure survival - no matter how much talking to other people feels like the heat of the battle, you can't (legally) solve it with a gun or throw a frag and book it out of there. There's no true guide to social interactions and that stresses him out. There's no manual, no field guide, no ten step card on how to successfully navigate them.
He knows things that are normal to say, he knows sometimes what he should say - it's just a matter of finding the phrasing and how to say them. Yet it seems like whenever someone doesn't follow his pre-programmed line of thought when it comes to their talking, his mind can shut down and go blank as he stares, trying to figure out where to go or what to say (spoiler: it usually doesn't end well).
He's usually awkward to talk to because he's running over everything in his head as he tries to think of what best to say to avoid further interactions or ones that could be more targeting to him. And, as mentioned, he lacks the average set of social skills that plenty learn in childhood because he didn't have that proper socialization. He's also still not the best at talking itself and can be blunt and to-the-point, which also doesn't usually go down well.
Not to mention, he's bad at small talk and has a terrible, sarcastic sense of humor that many can't read and it quickly turns things uncomfortable very fast because everyone takes him seriously. It never helps he usually doesn't explain himself all too well, usually leaving it as is as he secretly wishes he didn't talk at all when mortification sets in. Hurrying away with an excuse of some paperwork or something else to busy himself is his go-to after those.
When possible, he'll avoid small-talk and greatly prefers gestures instead. Someone who can appreciate his greater need for silence and a lack of talking is someone who he will greatly appreciate in turn. He's a firm believer that not all silences are uncomfortable and sometimes, it IS best not to say anything at all.
Due to his childhood too, he's not really fond of being around many people and will do his best to avoid it. Unless he has to grin and bare it, he won't. He finds his mind calmest when he can just be himself without having to worry about saying the right things to appease others or to be friendly. That way he can focus on what he wants, think how he wants, and feels how he wants without second guessing himself or having to worry about existing.
He's going to avoid most public settings when possible. Though he can now suitably manage his anxiety, they're something he passes up on. Grocery store trips are something he does maybe once a week or two, if that - stock piling so he has to go to the store less is his usual strategy. Anything he can do himself, he WILL do himself, if he doesn't have a trusted person who can do it better or can help.
Notably, he also doesn't have many friends. He's like talking to a brick wall and unless you're considerably persistent and understanding of his need for space, you won't get far. A lot of people don't have the time nor patience for it, but if you do get close to him, he does come out of his shell. He appreciates anyone who cares enough to actually get close to him and get to know him despite how awkward he can be, and will be loyal to the end because of that.
Another side effect is that he doesn't sleep well. Between the massive amounts of trauma from his job and the trauma from his childhood, he doesn't sleep well as is. But the social anxiety aspect comes into play because many nights, his mind is rerunning all the interactions he's had as he chronically overthinks them. He always wonders what he could've done, how he could've improved, and what they're thinking of him (even if they're someone he may never run into again). Its very hard for him to shut his mind off and doing such usually requires him drowning everything else and making himself not think about that, or anything, any more.
[Another side note: He's an avid reader. Reading gives him new things to think about and can help put him to sleep, especially before bed. It's a good way for him to stop thinking about whatever was nagging him and shifts his mind into thinking about other things he enjoys instead)
Basically, IN SHORT this isn't my full in-depth detailed characterization of exactly who I think he is - the reason he's not presenting it as an anxious ball of pure energy who is so uwu shy and soft is because he is incredibly well-managed with his severe social anxiety at his age and that's uh, just not him. Social anxiety doesn't mean he's a blubbering mess or will cry at the slightest inconvenience and reducing him to that or treating anyone with social anxiety like they're a child because of it does not help at alllll.
He's had extensive therapy for this, he's got his methods, he can mask very well. He's a WHOLE GROWN MAN who is responsible for not only his actions but how he manages his emotions and he knows it. But if you know him and know what to look for, you'll be able to pick it up.
(Also the sheer amount of scenarios I've seen where people think he just would... cry if you took his mask off??? Him???? HIM???? König, "I can make you talk, where are they?" the skilled PMC operator? That one? That guy? Yeah no, anyone dumb enough to do that better have signed their will prior or hopefully has an intensive love for scrubbing all the floors with a single old toothbrush. He won't tolerate people harassing or hustling him or pressing on his nerves. Sure, it reminds him of his childhood bullies, but quite frankly that behavior as grown adults trying that is RIDICULOUS, it pisses him off and immediately lowers his opinion on them.)
To whoever made it this far, I hope this made sense, I took melatonin before I got the ask so I'm in another realm right now LMAO. König is one of my favorites and was the first character I realllly really loved and I just hate seeing him done so dirty. Especially as someone with severe social anxiety myself, it irritates me when it's portrayed just so... wrong and quite frankly, in a lazy, offensive manner lacking any nuance especially in relation to the character who has it. Like just making him stutter and cry isn't all social anxiety is and there's SO much depth and things to work with despite the... actual substance as far as his bio goes
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