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#this whole thing is part of why i dislike when people just
darklinaforever · 1 day
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The thing about romance books that have a lot of different couples explored within a several part series is that not everyone is like certain books. So I don't understand this whole obsession with genderbending love interests? Or even changing so much of it? Even if you like those changes, allow the OG fandom (the book lovers) to mourn for those changes? Sophie fans don't want her to be genderbent. Michael fans don't want him to be genderbent. And yet you will see some Michael fans pointing out that they should genderbend Sophie but not Michael. Some Sophie fans are trying to argue that it is fine for Michael to be genderbent. Then you have people who are making a case for Eloise to end up with a woman (genderbent sir philip or no) but some people who loved her book don't want that. There are many women who are arguing that having another female character who is outspokenly feminist be gay is a stereotype at this point, and many of those fans find it refreshing for her to end up with a man. Although, even those fans agree that they would like to see changes to the Philip + Eloise story. Not to mention, the discussion of possibly genderbending the love interests of Hyacinth and Gregory (which I will be so upset by - especially Lucy). I have already seen people on reddit debate that Lucy should actually be a man. I feel like it doesn't have to make "sense" to genderbend a certain character. If people are attached to a character being a certain way, don't make large changes.
Lastly, I feel like a part of introducing Michaela was for shock value but to also prep the fans the possibility of Sophie being a man. He could've been introduced much later, but I feel like part of the motivation is to gauge the audience's reaction and give people some time to adjust before the new season starts where they feature male!Sophie. Especially since they decided to finally address Benedict's sexuality which I feel was terrible writing. Benedict has barely had any good arcs. They should've explored his sexuality before and made that an arc rather than having it thrown about without any good writing. So, it feels they are pulling the Benedict is bi card NOW because they want audiences to be prepared for the change.
Anyways, I am a lesbian, in case any of the homophobia arguers want to get angry about this rant. I love romance books and my favorite are sapphic books. I just wish shows would stop pulling this shit. It only frustrates people and then divides fandom. It is like these showrunners are too lazy to ever actually be willing to take a risk or start from scratch and build up a fandom. They always want to take advantage of an already large fandom so they can make the changes they think will have people praise their writing and then gaslight the fans when they dislike those changes.
It's so insulting to so many minorities. Are we not good enough for our own stories? Must we always have these hollywood idiots steal other stories and try to force it? Do they have any IDEA how many LGBTQ books are published that would make for 10/10 romances. Sorry for the rant. I am just pissed.
Exactly ! There is so much history to be created about queer people. No need to change the types of characters already existing within a fandom !
And I completely agree with you on Benedict. I said it myself. They poorly explored his pseudo sexual discovery. Not to mention the fact that yes, we really give him little material each season and I don't understand why. Needless to say, I can't wait to finally see him shine in the forefront !
Also, probably even if you specify that you are a lesbian, you will still be accused of homophobia by these morons.
I'm Bi, and I had the right to an anonymous person telling me that I hated queer people.
Bullshit level we are damn high.
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ae-neon · 3 days
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Wait, rhys can forgive nesta because "illyrian at heart". I did some logic:
Rhys forgive Elain = Elain has no illyrian heart
Rhys couldnt forgive Nesta = Nesta has illyrian heart.
So does that mean
Rhys dislike illyrian = Rhys dislike Nesta = Rhus couldn't forgive Nesta = Nesta has illyrian Heart
He dislike illyrian when he, himself half illyrian? Not surprising but it make me thing Rhys is a High-Fae-boo (idk inspiration from try hard people wanting to be korea = koreaboo)
P/s: Please, any mathematics major, let me know if my logic is wrong
In a way yes, they all are because despite how cool and exotic sjm wants us to see the bat bitches being ⚔️ ILLYRIAN ✨ as, those benefits are exclusive to TheGoodOnes™
They get to be deadly warriors and have special clothes and sooo many siphons and huge dicks wings and they get to be ambiguously poc for white women to feel spicyyyy about
But only them and only those superficial things.
Despite being characterised by their less fortunate years, Rhys became HL at 30 and brought up Cassian and Azriel to be his overpaid helpers immediately.
That means (Amarantha years excluded) they have been the richest and most powerful people in their court for more than 400 of the 500 they have been alive
The reality of being "lesser Fae" or lower class/ bastards/ poor/ being part of a culture that glorifies war and harms it's ppl, has not really played as big a part in their lives as what sjm insists
They don't live in it, they don't deal with it, in fact, they benefit from it
They are free to not just feel their internalised racism, but allowed to physically, emotionally and mentally set themselves apart. Above.
And they spread it to their non-illyrian "family"
These men and the women they teach to mistrust and fear and hate Illyrians are the government, they have and will continue to have influence over the lives of the Illyrian ppl as a whole for CENTURIES if not FOREVER
Feyre, the High Lady, is taught to think of those people (almost third of the population, a racial minority and the poorest + most underprivileged people in the whole court) as savage brutes when the only Illyrians she personally knows are Rhysand, Cassian and Azriel themselves. She should at least love some Illyrians and their culture since appropriating it was such a big part of her healing and growth
But instead of frustration and sorrow spurring her into action to help raise Illyrian women from their oppression/ helping set up a more standardised living conditions for non-nobles/ even meeting the nobles to learn their culture and begin to find some way forward - she sighs, curses them as proud savage brutes and carries on flying around velaris in her culture vulture wings
I don't think sjm was really going for anything other than a vague "Nesta is nasty and tough, she'll be fine, I just don't like her" when she made Rhys say that but god does it reek
I don't think Nesta should be celebrated as Illyrian, even in a "good" way. She's not Illyrian. Her very nature is ominous to their culture and we should respect that. (I love Nesta but at the end of the day she is an extremely powerful high Fae who is sister to the HL, and a white woman, she won't die just because they call her a witch)
Part of this is why I wanted Cassian (who despite his problematic attitude and position, is the closest culturally to Illyria) to end up with an Illyrian woman. Centring a brown Illyrian woman as a love interest would be the closest this garbage series would ever get to acknowledging those women as important people and not just plot devices.
So, really the statement "Nesta is Illyrian at heart" or whatever he said, is like everything else surrounding the Illyrians: lazy and not well thought through, and just racist.
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mwagneto · 3 days
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I’m a bit afraid of the upcoming two-parter finale of Doctor Who, mainly because of the circulating TV show theory and a horrifying thought I had the other day concerning this theory. … What if this theory is partly true, and the entirety of season 1 was indeed a TV show, and therefore not real maybe. Which would be the worst possible outcome I think, given that people in general hate the “it was all just a dream”/ “it didn’t really happen”-trope. But if we take this outcome into consideration I was wondering, when did the “TV show” / the “performance” start? Since when is it all fake so to speak? Because one could argue that the ending Fourteen got, is way too happy. He got his own TARDIS by very ridiculous/ implausible means. He got his own family. Everyone is happy. It is the “and they lived happily ever after”- ending you only see in fairy tales or very sappy TV shows. So my horrifying thought was, what if the “performance” started right after they defeated the Toymaker and Fourteen’s happy ending isn’t real at all!?
YEAHH i thought about that too, especially since i saw someone mention that "maybe the 'show' started in wby" in a post i'll never find
i think it is a logical conclusion to jump to since that IS 100% where the turning point was, the superstition is invoked, the salt is thrown, bam. the entire universe tilts on its axis. but i realllly really don't think that's the case?
i'll put the rest under the cut coz it got too long + i tried adding paragraphs to make it more readable so sorry if it feels janky
ok so admittedly my reasons for thinking whatever is going on now is definitely post 14 ending is because, like you and the above mentioned post says, anything major starting in wby would make the giggle a part of the whole thing and undo 14s happy ending + make 14 at least somewhat part of the story which. is definitely not something they'd do. or i sure hope they won't!
like rtd said 14 was never coming back and like yeah showrunners lie but i think even he knows how much bringing 14 back for a main show appearance would suck ASSSS like while i don't think having 14 bigenerate really stole 15's thunder the way ppl are saying (and i get why those people are mad too, i disagree but i understand), having 14 come back in any way whatsoever would just be really bad both because
he already got his happy ending, he got a beautiful last scene, his and by extension 10's story got an incredible sendoff that i still can't fully talk about coz of how crazy it is but like. you get it. and to have him just... come back after that would be really weird? like?? yknow??? that's him done. bringing him back at all would kinda.. not just cheapen it but make the finality of his happiness feel like it's not that secure or peaceful after all. and
having 14, the guy created specifically to bring in more viewers after everyone gave up during 13 era almost leading to the show getting cancelled, a guy whose MAIN REASON for existing is because they knew he'd be incredibly popular, be relevant to 15's story would just. be bad. like again i don't think the bigeneration itself was disrespectful to 15 or stole anything from him but that is IT. 14 cannot come back again, he did his job (nostalgiabaiting audiences + bringing people back in + letting rtd have a beautiful little playground sesh with his old era) and it slapped but he got his time and his ending and i think slash hope rtd knows this and won't do anything to mess with it.
okay sorry that got so fkin long i didnt mean to. ANYWAY. ONTO THE ACTUAL THEORY geez..
SO. wrt the season/episodes being part of a tv show and my general view on tv show theory: like. yeah like you said people generally dislike the ohh it was all a dream twist, and the longer the stretch of time that turns out to have not been real gets, the more annoying the twist is, which i'm 100% sure rtd as a showrunning veteran is very very aware of, so i really don't think they'll do anything as insane as having the ENTIRE thing turn out to have not been real
like i thinnnnnnnnk if it is a tv show then everything we've seen will have been real as in like. it wasn't just the doctor trapped in goo forced to experience fictional people that don't exist and have no consequence once he wakes up
i also think if the tv show theory IS true in some way, then the doctor is definitely aware of it at least to some degree, hell half the evidence we have for it literally comes from things he himself does (and that applies in a broader sense too, even if it's not a tv show or something, he still seems at least partially aware of Something, especially in the devil's chord (which also directly ties into the giggle and references a lot of things) although hints and little moments have steadily declined since then, that was definitely the peak of the theorisable moments era)
so like, tldr of everything i said so far: i dont think 14 is coming back and i don't think they'll make the entire season turn out to have been fake, but im basing both of these solely on the fact that these choices would be really really really bad and i don't think they should happen
as for what i think IS going on: i feel like i can't fully be objective because i really want the tv show hints to go somewhere so i feel like a lot of me believing it comes from wanting to believe it and not actual evidence, but yeah i think it definitely ties into tv in some way
again i don't think they'll be like ohh the entire thing was fiction and none of these people were real so none of it meant anything, i think if it really is some weird non-reality then they'll still do it in a way that makes the real world relevant
but like, as demonstrated above, when it comes to overarching plots i think i'm generally better at predicting what WON'T happen than what will, like idk i can guess the murderer 1 minute into any detective thing but when it comes to guessing stories i can get kinda lost. like idk i notice all the hints and then some but without an obvious thing to point to that ties it all together i can never really make up the larger story of what's going down (unlike with, say, murder mysteries, where you already know all the suspects at the beginning) yknow ?? i hope that makes sense 😭
that and i always feel like making up specific theories means whatever i think will happen definitely WON'T happen so yeah basically i have no idea what is actually going on but i really really love speculating, and i'm not really afraid of any of the negative outcomes you and a lot of other people mentioned, like yea it IS possible and it would be really bad but i don't think they'd do it exactly because it would be really bad. but we'll see i guess...
for now i'm not worried and pretty excited and very very hopeful coz i LOOOOOVE how intricately built this whole season is like oh my goddd yessss hints mysteries secrets foreshadowing haha YESSSSSS HAHAAAAA!!!
one thing tho. that i forgot to consider for this whole essay until i was already typing the ending. is that the whole thing starting in wby with the salt seems likely but hopefully isn't the case HOWEVER. susan twist literally appears in wby well before the salt thing .. which is definitely something to keep in mind. what does it mean? i don't know ❤️ i think whatever her deal is isn't related or at least is only vaguely related to the whole superstition/fantasy thing BUT if it is a tv show and she plays a part in the tv show theory then her being in the episode where the entire genre of the show changed is rly interesting
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ferretwhomst · 1 year
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thinking so hard abt how belos and odalia played similar roles in hunter and amity's lives
they're pathetic excuses for parental figures, bringing up children and expecting them to live up to their own personal "blueprints" for them, stripping them of their autonomy in different ways.
in hunter's case, he's forced to be belos' idealized version of caleb without even knowing it. the golden guard's uniform has stayed mostly the same through time, which shows us that belos doesn't see them as individuals who deserve to be recognized as such, moreso as expendable objects. this one betrayed me? this one failed the task i assigned? no problem! i'll just kill them and make a new one. plus, hunter unknowingly faces additional pressure due to the fact that he looks more like caleb than the other grimwalkers.
in amity's case, odalia is obviously trying to turn her into a mini-version of herself. she takes away mostly everything that makes amity similar to her dad- she forces her to dye her hair the same mint green color, she puts more pressure on amity to perform well than the twins (which leads her to grow resentful towards them, which in turn allows for odalia to control them more easily. divide and rule and all that) and don't even get me started on how deeply invasive that whole amulet business was.
then there's shots like THIS featuring the Shoulder Touch of Manipulation TM
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which just... parallel each other so eerily. i can't stop thinking abt it. both belos and odalia are behaving as if they're acting in hunter and amity's best interests when really they're only using them for their own selfish motives (the whole "i can't let the same happen to you" thing from belos as if he isn't willing to murder hunter the second he begins to deviate from his will, and odalia cutting amity off from all positive outside influences- ie anyone who could empower her, anyone who could make amity believe that she deserves better than how her parents treat her- under the pretence of "protecting" her). i'm eating drywall right now.
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gobstoppr · 4 months
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and btw im in my hater arc rn. as time goes on the more i find a lot of 'fandom' stuff insufferable (i like art n stuff. just the way that fandom refits every media to fit a single mold and set of boring archetypes is exhausting.)
i just get really easily annoyed lately. and have been unfollowing people on a whim a lot. its not personal i promise
#fandom culture has made me actively dislike shit i was fixated on a year ago. looking at your ninja turtles#its not even like what they were doing were particularly offensive it was just exhaustingly boring#im sorry i just really dont care about ur 2 million fics about leo being a sadboy. or one million seperated aus.#theres definetly a part of the whole situation in general which has been me coming to terms with my own internalized misogny#actively re-examining my tendencys to gravity towards male characters#idk maybe its making me dislike art more. but idk. ive always analyzed why i react certain ways to certain things. this isnt new for me#anywaays. i had been following a bunch of ninja turtle blogs and they sorta kept messing around with shows like ninjago too#and at some point i was just like. i dont know if these shows are actually that good guys. i think youjust like shows for little boys#and fandoms tend to shaft female chars so it sure helps that their casts are 98% male .#maybe theyre not your blorbo maybe theyre just Guy McAverageMan. thats not inherently bad but you have to consider it.#guys rottmnt is isnt even that good . its not that good ok. its alright/pretty good. and the movie does a few neat things#i feel like ive become one of those people that turn 18 and then immediately go 'minors dni'. im not there yet but i just.#we're watching kids shows. its ok . you can say it.#you may have noticed ive been reblogging a lot of dungeon meshi stuff. i read it all over the past week.#but here's the thing. i thought it was mid/good for like 70% of it.#i think its got some really really cool worldbuilding ideas and stuff#but i think a lot of the writing was sorta. uninteresting to me.#my discord friends have been raving over izutsumi for months.#but i found her presence in the story to be weird and underdeveloped. she felt out of place and her introduction felt clumsy#i felt when the story was ramping up the manga got a lot better. because again theres some rlly cool ideas at play#all the shit with the lion? incredible. the way all the infighting led to more problems bc the elves refuse to explain anything? rlly good.#marcille landing in power? reallly good shit. (i still thought it was a lil undercooked still tho)#i cant stop thinking about laios in that climax scene. i think he shouldve been feral a lot more often#uhh. i got distracted. fandom bad and annoying.#saw a post talking about marcille realizing izutsumi is only 17 and then describing how 'omg shes a mom now' and i wanted to throw up#im done. i swear. im done talking for real. aagh#text
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everyone applaud me i stress wrote a whole 3page essay (and read 20+ pages in my massive fucking textbook for context) in like 45 minutes. it is the most half-assed thing i've ever turned in but that's besides the point
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louisa-gc · 1 month
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how to start reading again
from someone who was a voracious reader until high school and is now getting back into it in her twenties.
start with an old favourite. even though it felt a little silly, i re-read the harry potter series one christmas and it wiped away my worry that i wasn't capable of reading anymore. they are long books, but i was still able to get completely immersed and to read just as fast as i had years and years ago.
don't be afraid of "easier" books. before high school i was reading the french existentialists, but when getting back into reading, i picked up lucinda riley and sally rooney. not my favourite authors by far, but easier to read while not being totally terrible. i needed to remind myself that only choosing classics would not make me a better or smarter person. if a book requires a slower pace of reading to be understood, it's easier to just drop it, which is exactly what i wanted to avoid at first.
go for essays and short stories. no need to explain this one: the shorter the whole, the less daunting it is. i definitely avoided all books over 350 pages at first and stuck to essay collections until i suddenly devoured donna tartt's goldfinch.
remember it's okay not to finish. i was one of those people who finished every book they started, but not anymore! if i pick up a book at the library and after a few chapters realise i'd rather not read it, i just return it. (another good reason to use your local library! no money spent on books you might end up disliking.)
analyse — or don't. some people enjoy reading more when they take notes or really stop to think about the contents. for me, at first, it was more important to build the habit of reading, and the thought of analysing what i read felt daunting. once i let go of that expectation, i realised i naturally analyse and process what i read anyway.
read when you would usually use your phone. just as i did when i was a child, i try to read when eating, in the bathroom, on public transport, right before sleeping. i even read when i walk, because that's normally a time i stare at my screen anyway. those few pages you read when you brush your teeth and wait for a friend very quickly stack up.
finish the chapter. if you have time, try to finish the part you're reading before closing the book. usually i find i actually don't want to stop reading once i get to the end of a chapter — and if i do, it feels like a good place to pick up again later.
try different languages. i was quickly approaching a reading slump towards the end of my exchange year, until i realised i had only had access to books in english and that, despite my fluency, i was tired of the language. so as soon as i got back home i started picking up books in my native tongue, which made reading feel much easier and more fun again! after some nine months, i'm starting to read in english again without it feeling like a huge task.
forget what's popular. i thought social media would be a fun way to find interesting books to read, but i quickly grew frustrated after hating every single book i picked up on some influencer's recommendation. it's certainly more time-consuming to find new books on your own, but this way i don't despise every novel i pick up.
remember it isn't about quantity. the online book community's endless posts about reading 150 books each year or 6 books in a single day easily make us feel like we're slow, bad readers, but here's the thing: it does not matter at all how many books you read or what your reading pace is. we all lead different lives, just be proud of yourself for reading at all!
stop stressing about it. we all know why reading is important, and since the pandemic reading has become an even more popular hobby than it was before (which is wonderful!). however, there's no need to force yourself to be "a reader". pick up a book every now and then and keep reading if you enjoy it, but not reading regularly doesn't make you any less of a good person. i find the pressure to become "a person who reads" or to rediscover my inner bookworm only distances me from the very act of reading.
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lgbtlunaverse · 2 months
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This page from the adventurer's bible makes me want to cry
Like basically any neurodivergent dungeon meshi fan, I see a lot of myself in the Touden siblings. But I was blindsided by just how much I suddenly related to Falin in this little comic from the adventure bible's complete version.
It's about the Touden siblings' differing relationships with their parents, and why Laios still holds their treatment of Falin against them, while Falin herself doesn't.
We know that Falin was isolated and ostraziced by their village after she saved Laios from a ghost, displaying her uncanny affinity for magic. Her parents, instead of defending her, sent her away, which angered Laios so much he ran way himself before Falin even left for magic school, hoping to make a living so he and Falin could live together alone.
He tells Marcile this, but when she goes to Falin, she says she sees things differently. Her father sent her to magic school to protect her form the rest of the village without having to cause a conflict. He didn't explain that, and we actually see her burst into tears when he says it.
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But, well... Laios was gone for a year before Falin went to magic school, and everyone else in the village avoided her. The understanding Falin has with her parents to me looks like one borne out of necessity, she literally didn't have anyone else to talk to.
And this is where we get to the page that made me want to cry
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Like I said, I relate to the Toudens because I'm neurodivergent myself. that feeling of suddenly realizing you're disliked, but not knowing what you did wrong or what you should have done instead? Yeah... that's one I recognize.
When I was around 9 years old, the same age Falin is in this comic, a bunch of kids in my class decided to make a "game" where you lost if you touched me. It was basically the 'cheese-touch' from diary of a wimpy kid, except I always had it and couldn't pass it along. They'd pretend I was poisonous or disgusting and run away from me screaming or gagging. The point was to make fun of me. But my autistic little 9 year old ass thought "Oh I get it! It's tag but I'm always it!" So I... played along. Running at a boy and having him fall on the ground screaming in fake pain because you tapped him is, in isolation, pretty funny.
It wasn't until months into the "game" that I realized it was meant to be meanspirited. That the reason I was the one who was always 'it' wasn't an arbritrary rule but the whole point. Because I was weird and gross. I wasn't in on the joke, I was the punchline.
Falin may have come to understand her parents' intentions, but she didn't always. The adventure bible actually tells us that she at first didn't even notice that the rest of their village disliked her. She clearly knows now, but she had to be told. So when her mom tried to exorcise her, she just saw it as an activity she got to do with a mother she usually didn't get to spend much time with because of her poor health. It's only Laios who notices something is wrong.
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(Sidenote, Laios being hyper-aware of people's poor attitudes towards Falin but completely blindsided when he's in the same spot, like with Toshiro, is also very relatable as an eldest sibling)
It probably also took Falin months, until after her brother had left and she had no one but her parents, to realize why her mother had been doing all those things.
And I know they're not the same. Even misguidedly, Falin's mom was trying to help her, not make fun of her like those boys in my class. (Though, as a queer person who also cares a lot about the queercoding in Falin's storyline, a parent trying to 'exorcise' their child of a fundamental part of them the parent thinks is evil or corruptive? yeah... that's not perfectly wholesome)
But do you know what I did, when I finally figured out the game was always meant to make fun of me?
To me, it looked like I had a choice.
See, those boys eventually figured out I didn't understand that they were being mean to me. I'd laugh every time I managed to catch one of them, I was visibly having fun. And while it no doubt only made me more of a weirdo in their eyes, they never informed me that I shouldn't be enjoying myself. That the point was for me to feel hurt.
So now that I did know, I had a choice. I could either get upset, and let the insult land as it was supposed to. That wouldn't stop them, because making fun of me was the original goal. Or I could ignore it and go on as usual. They had already accepted that I didn't get it, and they weren't gona stop me from having fun, so why should I?
And the thing is that I had... one friend, in that whole class. One person who actually liked talking to me and hanging out with me. I was lonely. And the 'game' provided me with another social interaction, mean-spirited as it was, that I desperately needed. And it was so delightfully simple. Navigating actual friendships as a kid with autism and adhd was so fucking complicated, and I'd never know when I might break an inivisble rule. But I knew the rules to the game perfectly!
Sometimes, if I was chasing one of them, the others would trap him and hold him down so I could tap him. In those moments it actually did kind of feel like I was playing with them, rather than against them. And it didn't change much, they didnt start actually liking me. But they were willing to roll with the fact that I wasn't upset, and I took advantage of that because I needed to.
So you can look at Falin seeing the best in her parents as her being naïve, but I look at this page and I see myself, at first unable to differentiate between playing and being made fun of. And then later, when I did see the difference, deciding not to get mad about it because that'd mean losing that social interaction, and I couldn't afford to.
Like I said, Falin probably first realized this in the year she spent with her brother gone, and everyone else avoiding her like the plague. If she refused to talk to her parents, like Laios did, she'd have no one left.
I see a lot of people relating to the fight between Laios and Toshiro. that frustration when you realize someone you thougth was your friend actually hates you, and they never said anything, never gave you a chance to fix it because you had no idea that you were even doing something wrong! And I can see that, too. But sometimes, when people don't fully hate you, it feels better to go along with the pretending. Because adressing it won't fix it. Because the problem isn't a specific behaviour, it's you. And if they're willing to tolerate you, despite the fact that it's you, then you'll take it. Because other people do hate you, so this is the best you'll get.
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princess-stabbity · 2 years
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my mom has this tendency to assume, if i express a strong opinion on something, that i'm having a kneejerk emotional response, and haven't thought it through. and i wonder sometimes if other people do too, and it's just less obvious (because mom will try to counter with hypotheticals meant to challenge my statement).
the thing about me, tho, is when i let loose with a strongly-worded opinion, it's usually something i've been gnawing over quite a bit, actually. i have a deep-seated dread of Being Wrong, factually or morally, like to a clinical degree so usually when i say something, it's carefully couched in tentative language, and/or something i've thought about quite a bit.
this is not to say that i'm never acting or speaking emotionally, or that i never give in to kneejerk reactions. quite frankly, the people who brag they're perfectly rational tend to be the least, because they believe rationality and emotionality are inherently mutually exclusive. since they have assigned themselves the identity of A Rational Person, any reaction they have must be rational. So they conflate their emotions with objective reality, and at best work backwards to justify their initial emotional response, rather than examine and process it.
but despite the platitudes about missed opportunities, most of the regrets i've had in my life have been about shit i've said without thinking. times i've said something ignorant, or unkind, or just been confidently incorrect about something and embarrassed myself. so, in my dotage, i try very hard to restrain my impulse to shoot from the hip.
i'm still wrong sometimes, i'm sure. but at the very least, i can usually say i did the due diligence of trying to think it over thoroughly first. reading conflicting opinions, trying to get all the facts, investigating every possible counterpoint i see, consulting someone whose insight i trust, and finally just writing it down and coming back later to see if i still feel the same way. i literally have over 3,000 drafts on this site, in large part because that's the primary place i dump my hot takes. (as you can imagine, learning there's apparently a bug where sometimes people can see shit from your drafts on their dash was a fucking horrifying revelation.)
i guess i just wonder why she makes this assumption. like, is it just her (possible, she really prides herself on "seeing things from all sides")? or is it something about me: does the force of my expression alone makes it seem as though i'm working on pure emotion, because people instinctively assume that's incompatible with reason? or is it perhaps the contrast with the overly meek way i often express myself otherwise (for ex, i remember saying "i think we're out of those" once to a customer at work when i knew for a fact we were, and mentally kicked myself when they demanded i check to be sure). or is it something else entirely?
i don't know. all i can say is when i do actually post rants here, it's typically, like, the fourth draft on a topic that's been pissing me off for months, not something i threw out there in the heat of the moment
#i don't even usually argue with her anymore when we get pissed at each other#i leave. wait for us both to no longer be angry. and come back with 'here's how this made me feel' or w/e#which she's noticed and praised me for#so the assumption i can approach THAT coolly but not like. idk. the j*hnny d*pp thing. just feels a bit silly#and i think that's what annoys me about the whole thing: shouldn't she of all people recognize this by now?#dad does. when i express a strong opinion on smth he wants to know why#because he knows - even if he ultimately doesn't end up agreeing with me (tho he usually does) - that i have Reasons#and he's very open to learning new things and having his mind changed#whereas mom wants that in theory but i think part of her dislikes that coming from her own child even tho. y'know. she raised me this way#but i don't think all of this is mom. i do think some of this probably comes back to smth abt the way i express myself#which is frustrating bc. y'know. this is precisely the time i WANT people to listen and think about what i have to say#you'd think when the person who usually hedges and talks about the nuances says smth declarative for once it would hold MORE weight#but somehow i feel people listen less the more certain i am#even tho i usually try to approach with facts and carefully constructed arguments#and meet them where they're at rather than lecture from on high or pound the bully pulpit#perhaps the secret is most people would rather be gently lured to a conclusion so they can feel like they got there themselves
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ironunderstands · 1 month
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These Aventurine, Topaz and Jade comparisons are getting out of hand…
As much as I adore both of them, I think it’s very disingenuous to compare Aventurine and Topaz’s lore and be like “but they are the same!!!! If people like Aventurine and dislike Topaz that’s just misogyny!!! and like… no?
Topaz’s whole thing is that she doesn’t know the extent of the IPC’s evil, and believes that what she’s doing is genuinely the right thing to do. Even if she never had a choice in joining the IPC, she (incorrectly) believes what they did to her and her planet is justified, logical and moral, and for those reasons she stands with them. Part of this is likely IPC brainwashing, as she was probably very young when she became an indentured servant to them, and someone living on a planet on the brink of destruction would likely view anyone who stepped up to save them as heroes (imo the IPC likely waited for the point of no return to establish contact so her people had no other choice to except).
However Topaz got best end of the proverbial stick, her planet and its people were deemed useful by the IPC, and didn’t fight back, even if in the end they were still exploited.
Unfortunately, we have seen through Boothill, Belabog and Aventurine what happens when that isn’t the case.
Boothill’s planet got bombed and people genocided because they had a resource useful to the IPC, but were unwilling to cooperate with them or hand over their home, so the IPC decided to eradicate them.
Belabog had a debt owed to the IPC that was ridiculously high and very unfair to expect them to pay back, and had Topaz not convinced the higher ups to give them some time (which she got demoted for), the IPC would have taken Belabog by force
That leaves us with Aventurine, whose story is in no way on the same level of bad as Topaz’s. Unlike her, he has witnessed and experienced firsthand the truly awful shit the IPC can do.
They took custody of Sigonia and promised to offer the Avgin aid in their fight against the Katacans, at the very least protect them from harm. (Sidenote, since the IPC held control over Sigonia, they should have stopped the fighting in the first place). However, they simply stood by and did nothing, resulting in the deaths of around 6,000 Avgin, with around 3,000 went missing (or injured, I don’t remember, either way it’s bad).
But wait! It gets worse! Aventurine when he was still known as Kakavasha referred to the IPC as “the men in black/the men in black suits”, and his first master says he bought Aventurine from “the men in black/the men in black suits”, likely mocking the way he referred to them. Therefore THE IPC TOOK PART AND LIKELY EVEN CREATED A FUCKING SLAVE TRADE IN SIGONIA
Look being made into an indentured servant isn’t fun, but idk personally I’d take that any day of the week OVER BEING ENSLAVED
That’s not even to mention how horrible of a reputation Sigonian’s have in the galaxy, one likely spread by/resulting from the IPC themselves, as at least on Aventurines planet they do not have the mobility to make a name for themselves. (Honestly it’s a mini theory of mine that Aventurines scam is what partly contributed to this reputation, and his status as a slave is something the IPC conveniently left out in their broadcast about it-)
But, you might be saying, didn’t Aventurine have a choice to join the masked fools and leave the IPC, isn’t he free now? And to that I say, it’s complicated.
Considering the amount of suicidal shit Aventurine has done while being part of the IPC, he clearly hasn’t been having a fun time as a member of one, so why does he stick around, especially with the Fools invite? Even if he was a slave, does that absolve him of the crimes he’s committing now? What could justify his actions?
Revenge, plan and simple.
This is going to delve into some spoiler territory for the end of the Penacony 2.2 quest, something which I didn’t feel like mentioning earlier because I’m sorry but everyone and their mother already knows Boothill’s lore. Now, let’s get into it.
Aventurine accepts Jades offer to join the IPC, and when he becomes a Stoneheart, the first thing he asks about is the fate of the Avgin, to which he then learns that besides him, they are all dead. You see, from birth Kakavasha was pushed onto a pedestal as the savior of the Avgin, but now that there are no more Avgin to save, his primary motivator in becoming a Stoneheart (beyond not being enslaved anymore) is gone.
So what does he do now?
Simple, try to kill the motherfuckers behind it.
That’s why he takes on such risky gambles still, and why he wagers and wants Diamond to promote him to rank p46. The higher Aventurine gets the closer he gets to his goal of taking down the IPC for good.
Which is why his meeting with Boothill is so meaningful. I think Boothill is going to “kidnap” him and together they are gonna take down the wicked bitch that is Oswaldo Schneider for his literal crimes against humanity.
Mark my words, an IPC downfall is going to happen, and I think Topaz, Aventurine, Boothill and Ratio are going to be at the forefront of it.
However, Topaz and Ratio (and by extension the rest of the galaxy) have to learn/realize the true horrors of the IPC (although I can sense Ratio doesn’t really like them, and he’s learned a lot from Aventurine, I doubt he knows the full extent of the situation or is in any way happy about it). Therefore? Topaz mental breakdown arc? Ratio lore? PLEASE??!? The IP3 compliment one another so well and god I can’t wait for that to come to fruition.
I really want to see a Topaz and Ratio centered story leading up to an IPC smackdown, and I think we are gonna learn a lot more about how shitty they are in the later half of 2.2 and in 2.3 when the interlude and Jades release arrive.
As for the aforementioned Jade, she’s gonna need a Aventurine squared amount of trauma or reasoning behind her actions to seem in any way sympathetic, because right now she just seems like an evil bitch (in a semi good way, I will always respect the commitment to the bit) who loves her job and would make Machiavelli weep over how hard her ends are trying to justify her means.
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eunoiathewriter · 2 years
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X. THORPE X F!READER
Sypnosis: She smiled, and it became his favourite thing.
Word count: 5.3k
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
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It was becoming harder and harder to actually focus on what he was saying. Every few seconds, he would have to run his hand through his hair to push it away from his face as it fell in his eyes. Did he not have a hair tie? He usually did, so why, of all days, did he not have one now when his hair seemed to be the biggest bother of them all? Not even the way he spoke of Tyler could make her think he was more of a bother than his own hair.
To anyone around, it would not seem as though she listened to what she was told, as she just focused on a spot in front of her and let him talk. But she was, truly. Listening was one of the things she was best at, and she really wanted to hear Xaviers' reasons for why he disliked Tyler so much. Seeing as she had yet to meet him, she wanted to understand why he found the guy annoying and often rolled his eyes whenever she mentioned her sister just saying something about him.
If y/n ever told Xavier that Wednesday had been to talk to Tyler, he would scoff, then just tell her he was an asshole, idiot, bitch—or just whatever bad word he could come up with to call him. She would never admit it out loud, but she had labeled Tyler as an asshole ever since Xavier called him one.
After spending so much time together, the two quickly became close. Xavier had been intrigued by her since she came to Nevermore with Wednesday. He was intrigued by the fact that she did not appear to show much emotion on the surface, but as he got to know her, he discovered that she cared for people more than most people realized.
On the other hand, y/n had been pretty reserved in the beginning. She always eyed the tall boy strangely whenever he talked to her, and there was a certain kind of caution in her about actually getting to know someone. He had yet to learn why she had been so wary at first.
Now, Xavier had not noticed how quiet she had been for the past few minutes. He was too busy shittalking Tyler to notice. The fact that y/n wanted to listen and had said, "Please enlighten me. I'm genuinely curious as to why." So seeing as she had finally asked him to tell why, he had started off just telling how Tyler and his friends had destroyed his mural and jumped him. That slowly turned into a rant about everything he found annoying with him that had now gone on for the past five minutes.
Xavier had not gotten any kind of implication that she listened anymore. The silence that had become all too noticeable from her, as well as the looks they had received from fellow students, were not unnoticed. Just to kind of get an idea if she seemed to listen, he leaned forward to see her face. She was indeed just staring into space.
He let out a sigh that made her blink, turning to see that he had stopped talking and running his hand through his hair for the hundredth time. "And you're not paying attention, are you?"
Turning, he saw that she was now looking at him, blinking, and in her eyes he could see the confusion that did not fall upon her face.
"Who said that I'm not? Because I most certainly have been paying attention." It wasn't that she hadn't listened; she just thought it better to stay quiet and let people talk without disturbing them.
"What have I even been talking about then?" His tone was challenging; he was leaning forward and maintaining eye contact with her the whole time, a smug smile on his face.
"You started by explaining why you dislike Tyler, but then you just started mentioning everything that irritates you about him, which was about twelve different things, and all while doing so, your hair has been bothering you."
"So you did listen," It was not actually a question to be answered, yet he got one either way.
"Yes, I did." She paused for just about a second. "I have to admit that you constantly having to fix your hair was quite irritating."
"I don't have a hair tie." Even if he knew he didn't have one, he looked down at both his wrists just to make sure and felt through his pockets, seeing if one had magically appeared (though that wouldn't be a surprise, this was Nevermore after all.)
"Here." Turning his head back at the sound of her voice, he was met by y/n holding up a black hair tie in front of him to take. This caused him to take a second look at her; she looked at the hair tie and then up at him, silently telling him to take it.
"Thanks," Was he feeling cocky about seeing just the slightest of hesitation in her eyes while she looked at him? Yes, he surely did.
Their fingers were brushing as he took the hair tie from her, but as soon as Xavier had a grip on the hair tie, she quickly retracted her hand. With a smirk, Xavier gathered up the top part of his hair into a half-up, half-down style just to get the most annoying part of his hair away from his face.
"If your hair is being such a bother, maybe you should consider cutting it." It came out so suddenly that his hands just dropped from tightening the hair tie, and he turned to her with a questioning look. He thought she liked his hair as it was; at least Ajax said that's what Enid had told him.
"I sure hope there's an and—or a but to that." Xavier was able to detect just the tiniest bit of hesitation in her, as she seemed to have an and or but to that suggestion.
Swallowing hard, she could feel herself struggling to come up with the words to say it. This was what Enid had said: compliments can be a good start, but y/n was not one who ever really gave compliments. Plus, if she had gotten to know one thing about Xavier, it was that anything that would, in his ears, be considered a compliment was going to boost his ego. as if he didn't already have a bit of an ego.
"But," Turning just slightly to face him, there was already an amused smirk growing on his face. Her cheeks were growing increasingly hotter. "I don't think you should, because I like it as is."
"What would you do if I did cut it, though?" Yes, this was feeding into his ego a bit more, but to be honest, his insides were feeling as if butterflies flapped their wings a bit harder than they usually did. y/n looked around at the people in the courtyard while thinking about the question, also looking for the three others that were to join them.
"You would be six feet under."
"Oh, that's how much you actually like my hair." It was really amusing for Xavier to torture her like this, as somehow he could make out that she was getting a bit flustered by all this. He stood at his full height and poked her sides, making her jump and squirm.
"Stop that," y/n told him while swatting at his hands and being able to smack them a few times when he went to poke her sides even more.
As she struggled to smack his hands away from poking her even more, there was something that made him stop. Her lips had unconsciously pulled into a small smile that made him stop completely. Xavier had actually never really seen her smile; most of the time if she felt a smile pull on her lips, she would cover it up in some way, but this smile was one she had not noticed herself.
Just as he was about to say something about it, she was pulled away from him. Enid had been quick when walking up to the two and hooked her arm with y/n's, pulling her away from standing so close to Xavier. Both of them were taken by surprise.
"y/n!" Enid cheered loudly while holding on to the girl's arm and hugging her, earning a side eye from y/n, who then glanced at Xavier.
"My friend." Enid said, just as Wednesday and Ajax had caught up to them, shooting a glare at Xavier, who simply raised his hands at the werewolf-girl.
"Rude." Before the other two reached them, Xavier just took a last glance at her, trying to see if her smile was still there, but it wasn't. He liked it; the way she smiled made his insides flutter even more.
He wanted—no, scratch that. He needed to see that smile again.
——
Spending time in Jericho was better than being at Nevermore and having classes. No long boring classes about plants, no math, no assignments to do—just a day where all students could take a break from school. And sure, some of the work they could do in Jericho was maybe not the most entertaining, but all of the students from Nevermore saw any work as better than just sitting in school. Most normal people would consider school at Nevermore to be fun and unique, but it was simply a school designed for odd people, such as the Nevermore students, to feel less odd.
It had been Enid, who did not want to stand y/n just sitting around as they worked, telling her she would stab her eyes out with fire irons while being bored, who had given her the idea. So Enid told the Addams girl about a certain tall, blonde-brunette boy who was probably bored out of his mind at the Weathervane Cafe (it was a desperate attempt to get them together); she knew he would be; Xavier told her that Tyler worked there, so it would not really be his favourite thing ever. So that was where she was heading.
It was slightly cold outside, being autumn and all. The winds that blew the leaves around made it colder as she walked down the pavement of Jericho, seeing the cafe sign only about a hundred feet in front of her. When she finally arrived at the door, she did not hesitate to push it open, allowing herself to be engulfed by the warmth from within.
It was calm; not too many people were there; only about ten other people were there. There were a few duos that conversed with one another while simultaneously sipping on their coffee, tea, or whatever they were drinking. Four of the other ten people sat alone, one of them an elderly man who sat in one of the corners with a cup of black coffee and a brownie while reading the newspaper.
She took off her jacket, as it was warm enough inside without it. The cafe was placed just perfectly in town, as one could look out the windows and see the town just outside. The smell of coffee was the most noticeable of all, something y/n did not care for because she found the bitterness unpleasant.
Walking around the counter so she could look at all the drinks and things they sold, she found that there was no one at all behind the counter.
The calm was soon broken, however, when someone working there walked in, though it was not Xavier but a boy with shorter, curly hair. Something to know about y/n was that when she was out and about, she would not have her eyes completely relaxed so as to not seem so closed off, even though her voice wouldn't be the most expressive one, just to make people not feel as though they passed her off.
"Hello, is there anything I could get you?" The boy behind the counter gave her a slight smile, prompting her to mentally repeat what Enid had suggested she try.
"Hot chocolate, with some whipped cream and marshmallows." The boy behind the counter nodded and took out a mug to start making her drink, but she just turned around with a question on her mind, and y/n noticed he wanted to ask something. "Yes?"
"It's just that you remind me of someone I know," Her eyes narrowed in response to his statement. "Ehm, what's your name?"
"y/n Addams." He had just gone back to start making her drink and once again turned back to where she stood on the other side of the counter.
"You're Wednesday's sister, she's told me about you." Not true; she hadn't told him about him, just mentioned her sister. She knew that much about her sister. But, even if she didn't seem to care all that much, family was the one thing she cared about and only ever seemed to care about her. But Wednesday would never tell anybody just all about y/n, she knew that.
y/n realised who she was speaking with. The boy with whom Wednesday only briefly conversed and interacted. But he was the one who jumped Xavier with his friends. Okay, so you know what I said earlier about y/n already labelling Tyler as an asshole because of Xavier? Yeah, that still remains. She let her eyes that she had keept a bit less relaxed, finally, relax which made her whole expression change. Only Tyler appeared to be unconcerned.
"That means you are Tyler." Her eyes flickered over to a figure coming into her view, someone that Tyler could not see.
As soon as y/n mentioned her name, the blond-brunette in the back perked up from his sulking over having to work with Tyler. With furrowed brows, he had walked in behind the counter and now stood about twelve feet behind Tyler, leaning against the wall. Xavier knew that she had seen him enter, and just for the heck of it, he crossed his arms and waited to see how long it would take for Tyler to notice he was there.
"Yeah, yeah. Your sister has mentioned me?" It was a miracle he didn't notice her averting her gaze to Xavier with a questioning look in her eyes before returning her gaze to Tyler.
"Yes, my sister..."
Just as he was about to say something more, Tyler finally caught on that y/n were looking at someone behind him. Turning around, he saw Xavier leaning against the wall, arms crossed, with an annoyed look on his face. He raised a brow at the curly haired boy before looking at y/n who was looking between the two boys.
"You two know each other?" Tyler finally spoke as he turned to y/n; the question was directed at her, but it seemed that Xavier was about to answer, though y/n did not let him even utter a word before answering.
"Yes, he is my friend," y/n said after a brief pause. "And told me all about you."
Right then and there, Tyler realised why she had gone from looking a little tired to having a completely annoyed face when looking at him. Her tone signalled to him that she was hinting at just what he thought it to be. For him, it was awkward.
Finally having enough, Xavier pushed off the wall and walked towards where Tyler was behind the counter, clearly using his height as intimidation. "I'll just take this."
"Oh yeah.." With a glance at each of them, Tyler swiftly walked to start cleaning up some tables from previous customers that had left.
"Well," Xavier said, leaning forward on the counter, which she stood on the other side of. "Have you made your own assessment of him?"
"Asshole." That was all y/n said, and it made the boy in front of her chuckle, which in turn had an effect on y/n as her lips tugged into a smile at the sound of his laughter.
"You are right about that." Looking back up at her with a smile, his eyes flickered to her lips at the sight of her smile once more.
It was as if, for the past week, he had been playing "find the smile" on her. Trying to catch every smile she'd ever give, he'd seen about eight so far, nine including this one. She was good at hiding most of them. It was something about the way he smiled that he couldn't quite put his finger on, but it felt important. The fact that y/n seemed not to know that she did smile and that every time she did, he got to enjoy it.
"What are you doing here, either way?" Shaking his head, he asked just to come back to reality.
"To cut a long story short, there was an issue with the number of volunteers, so I couldn't work with Enid and my sister at Pilgrim World. Enid said I should go and spend time with someone who I actually enjoy spending my time with, so here I am."
"Oh, so you do enjoy spending time with me. Good to know I wasn't imagining it then." Her smile was still present on her face, which made this the longest she had ever held a smile.
"If I didn't, then me and Wednesday would have spent our first night here enjoying gravedigging. Though that would be fun to do again." y/n trailed in thought as she remembered just how long it was since she and her sister had been gravedigging. They really needed to do that again.
"You know at this point that whenever you say something like that, it's just an empty threat," Xavier pointed out while standing up, pushing off the counter. "You like me too much to do something like that to me. Admit it."
"Will you just make me that hot chocolate of mine that I never got?" y/n sighed, trying to dodge what he had just said. But he would not let it go.
"Not unless you admit that you like me too much to ever carry out your threats against me."
Her jaw tightened in annoyance as she watched him stand back and cross his arms again, waiting for her to admit it.He was gloating at her frustration at having to say it just so she could get that drink. His gloating was also not he was god at hiding, clear as day showing he found satisfaction in making her admit to things she would never say out loud. He had gotten to know her too well.
"Fine.. I like you too much to ever carry out any of my threats. Now can please have my hot chocolate or I'll leave you here alone with Tyler for the rest of the day, Xavier." He did not care for the glare she was shooting him as he got what he wanted, letting out a chuckle once more.
"One hot chocolate is coming right up."
——
Music played softly in the background. y/n had just switched from one song on Xaviers' playlist to another as she felt the previous one was not one she could read to. Xavier didn't mind; he let her know the password to his phone for a reason—he wanted her to also enjoy the music being played and not just him. She just put his phone on the bench in his shed and turned back to her book.
This had all been Xaviers' idea. He had slowly wanted to spend more and more time with y/n, starting to steal her away from Enid and Wednesday, much to Enid's distaste. The werewolf girl had made it very clear to him that "I'm watching you, Thorpe." Not that he felt too threatened by the blond, as it was more Wednesday that he was a bit more worried about. Seeing as she was already keeping a close eye on them, she often narrowed her eyes at Xavier when he came and asked if y/n wanted to come with him.
Anyway, it had all been his idea. y/n knew about his shed, where he spent most nights painting, she had been there quite a few times with him, and he enjoyed the company. He would be painting, sketching, or just doing whatever as y/n would sit with a book in hand, engulfed in the story as they always had music on in the background too.
Today was like any other time when Xavier asked if she wanted to come to the shed with him. He had just simply asked after dinner if she wanted to, and as always, he got a yes. They had simply just done a turn for the girls' dorm, where y/n had gone inside her, Enid, and Wednesday's shared dorm and taken the book she had just started reading.
It was always amusing to Xavier because whenever they went to Y/N's dorm so she could get a book and he was waiting outside, he would hear Y/N threaten Enid. Then Enid would say something as y/n opened the door once more before being cut off again by the door closing. It was always amusing to him.
Today, though, Xavier did have a motive for bringing her out to his shed.
Again he turned his head just to get a glimpse at y/n as she read her book, then took a look back at his canvas, so far he had gotten the general shape. Inspiration had been low when they first got there about an hour earlier (they got there much later than they usually did as it was slowly pulling towards curfew), but her just sitting there, reading on, gave him something to paint. He would of course tell her when he had started to actually get to the details so as not to spook her, but first he just wanted to get in a rough sketch of her.
y/n had just gotten to page 393. Oliver and James, the characters in her book, were backstage between two acts. Oliver demanded knowing the truth, and it was keeping y/n on edge as James was quiet and did not answer. That confirmed it all; it was him, and it made y/n gasp, causing Xavier to turn his head.
He raised his brows at her, an affectionate smile on his lips as he watched her. "What?"
"James just confessed to Richard's murder, though Richard deserved it."
"Okay, I'm going to pretend I know what's going on in your book." He turned back to the canvas to do his own. But he still found the way she had gasped at the book cute.
"The character accidentally killed the asshole character, and the police have just found out and are there to arrest him." It was a simple explanation, but it gave him the least bit of understanding for what was happening in her book. She had only about thirty pages left, so I could not wait much longer until she was done.
"Interesting." Xavier nodded while just adding a bit of simple lining for the background of the painting. "Could you switch to that Russian song?"
"Which? I know more than one Russian song." She put down her book and took up his phone once more, tapping in the password.
"You know, that one you found when you and Ajax were looking for music."
"Are you referring to Molchat Domas тоска?" Without even waiting for an answer, she put on the song and turned to see if it was the right one. He gave it a thumbs up to indicate that it was the correct song. But he didn't turn away from the canvas, staring at it intensely to see if everything was to his liking (which it was).
y/n leaned on the stool she had been sitting on while reading to see the canvas, seeing just an outline or idea for what he was going to paint. She was completely unaware that it was her. "Even now, I know it will look excellent once you're done."
She did not think much of it and picked up her book once more to read the last few pages of it and see what the outcome was. Would Oliver and James see one another again now that Oliver was set free after doing his time?
For Xavier, however, the comment was more than just a passing thought. Because he knew she didn't often compliment people, he was completely taken aback.Eyeing her.
"You think?" He only got a hum and a nod as an answer to his question, but it did not give him satisfaction.
He then came to realise one thing: he still had his brush in his hand, and it still had wet paint on it. Looking up from the brush in his hand to the girl, whose eyes were darting across the page, she was too preoccupied with what was going to happen next to notice the malicious grin on his face as he raised his hand with the brush in it. Quickly, he flicked his wrist in her direction, causing paint from his brush to splash at her.
She jumped at the sudden sensation of something wet splashing on her face. Blinking, she raised her hand and wiped her face, only to discover paint on her hand. Turning her gaze up to Xavier, she could see him trying to keep from laughing at her reaction.
"What?" y/n closed her book and stood up, her entire face now a question mark.
"You think it's going to look good when I'm done?" Unbelievable.
"Yes, I just told you that, Xavier." Sometimes she wondered if he was deaf, but deep down she knew that he made her repeat things because he found it amusing.
"Okay, just checking in."
Annoyed that he had gotten paint on the cover of her book, she grabbed the paintbrush from his grasp and did the same thing he had done to her, flicking the brush, making it splatter paint on his face. When he opened his eyes and looked down at her, he scoffed and quickly grabbed one of his other brushes, starting to repeatedly flick paint on y/n.
As a result, a paint splashing match ensued. Both of them were flicking paint at one another, and whoever got it on them jumped just slightly at the cold liquid. Then, when both of them stopped, neither of them flicking paint at each other, Xavier quickly looked y/n up and down before reaching out and painting a single stroke with the brush on her cheek.
And they were both on each other once more. They had paint strokes on their faces; Xavier had a few on his shirt; their arms; and they both had paint splatters in their hair. It was fun, with Xavier laughing as y/n was able to do one long stroke on his cheek just before he could smack her hand away. And she was smiling, a smile that was all too strong to be held back, and it did not go unnoticed by herself. She felt it, but smiling always felt good when it had something to do with Xavier.
Finally, Xavier had enough and dropped his brush on the floor, not really caring, and to stop y/n he grabbed a hold of her wrists, holding onto her and keeping her from getting more paint on him, but his hold on her wrists was gentle.
"Okay, that's enough." He could feel her struggle a little in his hold on her wrists, but his focus was on her smile. She did not directly look at him, but she smiled, and this time it was obvious that she was very aware of it.
Looking up at him, her arms relaxing in his grip, she was met by his green eyes, which were already watching her. Her eyes flickered between his, unsure of what to do. She panicked inside as this was new territory she was stepping onto. But then it hit her how short it was until curfew, and she turned her head, seeing that darkness had started taking over the outside world.
"I should go before curfew," y/n mumbled, but just as she went to pull away from him, Xavier pulled her directly back.
It surprised her when his hands went from holding her wrists to holding either side of her face. His hands had a few undried patches of paint that transferred over to her face. But she didn't care. The way she was holding her face made her look up at him; it was hard to look anywhere else. "You should smile more."
Xavier studied her face, which both had brushstrokes and paint splatters here and there, much like his also had, stroking his thumb against her cheekbone before leaning down a little just to place a kiss at the crown of her head. Not wanting to go all too fast.
y/n just stood there and let him, feeling a warmth inside her even when he pulled away and smiled a little. Seeing just the tiniest bit of shock in her eyes.
"I don't want to get you in trouble, so go." He noticed she only paused for a second before returning to reality, turning to the table, and taking her book. It was amusing yet adorable to watch the pure confusion on her face.
She turned and looked at him before walking out of his shed and back to her dorm. A genuine smile was on his face. "Goodnight, Xavier."
"Night, y/n." Something was waiting for her in her dorm, or it should have been. Otherwise, a certain hand was going to do some shit.
Reaching her dorm, confusion was still painted on her face, but as soon as she entered, y/n was met by a bouncing Enid who jumped up and down. Taking her out of the trance that Xavier had put her in, so many rushed words were coming out of Enid's mouth, and she was clearly excited about something. Spotting her sister standing off to the side, it took her just a moment to understand what was going on.
"Oh my god, y/n! Look at your bed! Look at your bed!" It was the first words Enid said to y/n taht she could detect as the blond hurriedly pushed her towards her bed.
"What is going on?" y/n asked her sister, mind still elsewhere.
"Just do as she says," Wednesday was clearly tired by the way she motioned for her to follow Enid over to her own bed.
So she did, and her bed was indeed so etching to look at—something she hadn't noticed before on her perfectly made bed. There laid a necklace, a silver one. Thing picked it up for her, holding it out for her to take, and he nodded at the hand that just stood on her bed. Behind her, Enid was looking over her shoulder at the necklace. It was silver with a peal in a little thing. There was only a single note that read: to y/n.
Enid squeaked beside her out of happiness as Wednesday took the necklace out of her hands to inspect it closer. "Oh my god, you have a secret admirer!"
"How did it get in here? It was not there before, correct?" Wednesday handed the necklace back to y/n.
"Correct," She wanted to say what she thought out loud but bit her own tongue just as Enid stopped spinning around and flopped down on her own bed. Babbling on and on about something that again just became distant words. All the while, Wednesday seemed to also have her own thoughts on it. y/n smiled at the necklace.
It was something Xavier had wanted to see, but this had been the easiest way to do it.
He got a bit more out of the night than just being able to get that necklace to her.
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thinking about simeon again.. he is so much more complex and tragic and interesting than the sweet innocent uwu angel that some of the fandom portrays him as
simeon writing tsl to cope with the terrible things he’s seen about the future and can’t tell anyone
simeon obeying the celestial realm only out of fear and obligation, not because he has any real faith in what it stands for
simeon, who would do anything for the brothers, but who will never be considered a core member of the family because he was too afraid to rebel with them
simeon, who would sooner blame himself for the brothers’ rebellion than the system they were all trapped in (as if him simply talking to lucifer the day before the war would have eased the resentment that had been building up inside him for a long time before that), who would rather feel guilty than accept the alternative, that there was nothing he could have done to save them
simeon’s initial dislike of diavolo because he still holds onto the hope that things could change, which simeon dismisses as naive, and probably also because he’s a repackaged version of celestial realm leadership: never lies but doesn’t say the whole truth, friendly and arguably well-intentioned but more manipulative and controlling than he wants people to think
simeon purposefully being as indirect of a teacher as possible to luke because he can’t directly badmouth the celestial realm but wants luke to learn to think for himself instead of absorbing an ideology and never questioning it until he realizes too late how much harm it’s done to himself and others
simeon’s quiet defiance of the celestial realm, more of a resignation than a rebellion because he knows firsthand from watching the brothers the futility of trying to fight an entity like that
simeon accepting his punishment so casually since he’s seen it coming for a long time and has grown numb to the anxiety it gives him (and maybe, he thinks, it’s even what’s best for him, because part of him still wants to believe the celestial realm has good intentions)
human simeon trying to convince himself that he’s better off this way, that he’s free from the celestial realm’s control now, but still feeling deep down that this is actually more isolating and a worse punishment than becoming a demon because most of his loved ones live in the devildom, not the human world
human simeon hiding his depression because he doesn’t want to disappoint anyone, especially luke. simeon hiding his humanity because he’s not ready to see himself differently and doesn’t want other people to perceive him differently either, trying to fake it til he makes it by wearing different clothes but not feeling like himself in them
human simeon silently wishing mc would spend more time with him because this transition is scary—how does mc live like this? why did they seem to just abandon him after he confessed that he was a human? do they really accept him like this or are they just saying that?
i imagine human simeon having a private breakdown over something minor like not being able to open a jar of spaghetti sauce, because if he was already weak as an angel, he’s even more so now. his whole life he was told his sole purpose is to help others, and now he can’t even help himself
simeon knowing the whole time that he was going to lose his wings someday but still not being ready for it when it happened
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bbyleiah · 10 months
Text
smoke you out.
| just a random cheating fic I wrote about Eren stealing Connie’s girl 🫣 |
Cw: smut, cheating, bf!Connie, lots of dirty talk (eren has a filthy mouth 🫦) dry humping, riding, biting, sorta mating press, unprotected sex, cream pie, squirting, tummy bulge, hair pulling, scratching, fluids, pet names, etc. fem! shy sub reader & dom!Eren. (pretty good amount of plot though ☝🏽) (also it may not seem like it but the reader is def black 😭)
word count : long asf 😭
sn : I don’t know a single thing abt smoking fr so my apologies if the lingo is inaccurate 😭
part 2 🤩 : breakfast <3
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You tripped over your little feet as you tried to keep up with your boyfriend Connie. He didn’t pay you any mind at all as he dapped up his friends at this house party gathering. Your feet were starting to hurt in your cute Mary Jane shoes. As you tripped, Eren caught your arm before you could embarrassingly fall on your face.
You sheepishly looked up at the tall, clearly high male. “sorry..” You muttered softly. “You’re good, little one.” Eren hummed as he let you go. You blushed and scurried off, finding your boyfriend again. He was finally not moving anymore, sitting in the kitchen with all his homies, smoking and drinking.
You honestly hated when he dragged you to these parties because it really wasn’t your kind of environment, and it wasn’t like he stayed by your side or made you feel welcome at these gatherings. Honestly, sometimes it seemed like Connie could care less about you with the way he ignored you and constantly forgot about you. But it was also confusing because he was super overprotective and possessive of you at times.
You were just his obedient pretty little girlfriend that followed him around but that role was getting tiring. despite disliking these parties, all of Connie’s friends always made you feel safe and welcomed so it wasn’t too bad. You stood quietly beside Connie, drinking water and fanning second hand smoke away from your face as he enjoyed his time with his friends.
His friends acknowledged you occasionally which was nice, but everytime you tried to talk to Connie he’d dismiss you or give half ass replies. You sighed and gave up eventually until you had to use the restroom. “Con, can you walk me to the bathroom please?” You asked him sweetly as you tugged on his sleeve. “Eh, why can’t you go by yourself princess?” He asked as he directed his attention towards you.
“Because I feel uncomfortable going alone with all these people I don’t know..” You told him, you felt like your stance was valid. Connie sighed, “I get that but you should be fine baby, everyone knows you’re my girl so I doubt they’ll bother you.” Connie said as he took another hit from his blunt. You pouted, “But..” you started but Eren interjected. “I’ll walk with her.” He offered.
“Look at that sweetheart, you got yourself a volunteer. Thanks bro.” Connie chuckled. You huffed softly and rolled your eyes at Connie’s nonchalant attitude, you honestly would rather just walk alone at this point. But you made your way through the crowd of people with Eren and up the stairs.
“thank you for walking with me even though you didn’t have to.” You said gratefully to Eren with a sigh, sulking a bit still over Connie and his lack of care for you. “No problem. I know Connie can be a dickhead sometimes.” Eren shrugged honestly. Your eyes widened at his words as you stared up at him. Eren chuckled at your reaction, “What? he’s my bestfriend. I can freely insult him. Just as he’d do to me. It’s all love you know?” Eren chuckled.
“I guess..I’d never insult Connie though. He’s a great boyfriend even though he has his faults.” You defended, Eren snorted in amusement. “Whatever makes your pretty head feel better.” He shrugged. You used the restroom and to your surprise Eren waited outside the door for you the whole time. “I-..you didn’t have to wait for me.” You stammered. “What’s the point of walking you if I don’t wait on you also?. I don’t mind it.” He said.
He had a point to be fair. “true..thanks again though.” You said. As you two began to walk again, you stumbled once more, these shoes were really starting to be your enemy. “You okay?” Eren asked you. “Yeah, these shoes are just a little uncomfortable.” You sighed as you tried to adjust the shoes.
Eren observed you before he suddenly picked you up, you yelped in shock, eyes going wide as you hit Eren’s shoulder. “Eren! What are you doing?!” You exclaimed. “Relax, I’m just tryna help” He said as he carried you back into the bathroom. He sat you down on the countertop and sat down in front of you before grabbing your foot gently.
He slipped off your shoe and that’s when you saw the bleeding bruise on the back on your heel. “Oh..” you mumbled. “You didn’t notice this until now? Wasn’t it painful?” Eren asked as he looked up at you. “It was..but I didn’t think it was that bad.” You muttered honestly. Eren sighed, “You should be more careful, or buy more comfortable shoes.” Eren said as he began to clean the blood. You hissed at the sting and kicked Eren by accident, he didn’t budge though, focused on treating you.
This was such an odd predicament you were in. Eren had paid more attention to you in a few minutes than your boyfriend did in months. You didn’t know why Eren was being so caring to you but you were soaking it up since you lacked it lately. “I would’ve worn my comfy shoes if I knew I was gonna be chasing Connie around again..” You muttered with a sigh.
Eren didn’t comment on that. You just observed Eren as he treated both of your heels. You never noticed his full appearance until now, his low bun with loose hairs framing his face, his low red eyes and sculpted nose, his black sweats and black tee combo with a small chain, the small studs in his ears. Eren was gorgeous to say the least. “Don’t look at me like that or I’ll do something bad and you’ll regret it more than me little one.” Eren said as he gently placed some bandaids he’d found on your bruises.
You were caught off guard by his words, starting to blush. “I-I didn’t mean to stare so much..I’m sorry.” You said as you hid your face in your hands out of embarrassment. Eren chuckled and pulled your hands away, “It’s okay sweetheart, you don’t have to apologize to me. I don’t mind you staring, but I meant what I said. I don’t have much self control.” Eren hummed as he stared into your eyes, his hand caressing your calf making you squirm a little.
“I uhm..” You truly didn’t know how to respond, chewing on your lip as you struggled to find words. Something about Eren’s vague words and the way he looked at you made you feel weird, the energy didn’t seem appropriate. “We should get back with the others.” You managed to say. Eren chuckled, “You’re right…or we could ditch them and hang out? I prefer smoking privately anyways. I could smoke you out real good too.” Eren suggested with a sly grin.
You stared at Eren in shock again, “Connie would kill me! Also I don’t smoke much.” You blurted. “He’s not even worried about you. plus you’re with me, his bestfriend and he trusts me. You seem like you have a low tolerance so I can still smoke you out even if you don’t smoke much” Eren hummed.
You chewed on your lip again as you pondered wether to accept Eren’s offer. Everything he said was right, and you knew Connie wasn’t looking for you or even thinking about you at the moment. You also knew that you’d be miserable following Connie around more. “okay, I’ll go with you. but let Connie know, I don’t want him thinking anything weird.” You said.
Eren subtly rolled his eyes, “sure, I’ll inform your master” Eren teased. “Hey! He’s not my master!” You huffed with a pout. Eren laughed, “You follow him like a little puppy though. You know I should start calling you pup, has a nice ring to it.” Eren only teased more, laughing harder when you kicked him this time on purpose. “I’m just loyal to my boyfriend.” You muttered with another huff as you crossed your arms.
“I get it. I’ll stop teasing. Let’s go little one.” Eren chuckled as he helped you down from the countertop. You slipped your shoes back on and then you and Eren left and made your way to his car. Eren wasn’t planning on informing Connie of shit, he felt like it was none of Connie’s business what you two were up to, to be honest.
He only told a small lie so he didn’t feel too bad about it. Once y’all got into his black vintage mustang, Eren turned on the radio, rnb starting to play lowly in the background as Eren began to roll up. “You smoke papers sweetheart?” Eren asked as he grinded his weed. You stared at him completely clueless, “…I don’t know, what’s papers? I just smoke whatever Connie gives me.” You said honestly.
Eren chuckled, “These are papers, they’re white. They aren’t brown like rellos. I smoke joints, not blunts. Although I don’t mind either. Also don’t say no shit like that ever again, don’t just smoke whatever is given to you. Make sure it’s safe first and that you know exactly what it is.” Eren said seriously suddenly. You pouted, feeling like you just got scolded a little. “I trust Connie though..but I get what you mean. I’ll take your advice.” You said, understanding his point.
“Good Girl. You can watch me and see exactly what you’ll be smoking and all the steps.” Eren hummed. Your brain short-circuited a bit at the sudden praise, hearing Eren say that felt nice..really nice and it made you want to hear it more. Those feelings felt wrong though so you pushed them away. You watched Eren closely as he rolled up; placing the grinded weed into the papers, setting it straight and then running his tongue along the seams before closing the joint.
You unconsciously clenched your thighs seeing Eren lick the joint, you didn’t know why a sight you’d seen many times suddenly seemed so attractive. “You have a tongue piercing?!” You blurted after spotting the little ball. Eren chuckled, “I do, got it a few years back. You must’ve been paying real close attention to notice that” Eren teased a little.
“I wasn’t looking that hard!” You defended yourself as you blushed slightly. Eren laughed, “You’re so damn cute, fuck.” Eren said while shaking his head as he laughed. Your eyes went wide at that comment, now blushing a lot. It was extremely flattering hearing that from someone as attractive as Eren and it made you shy.
You composed yourself though, trying to act as if the small compliment didn’t effect you as much as it did. “Did it hurt when you got it?” You asked him out of curiosity, going back on topic. You watched as Eren placed the joint between his lips, lighting it with his lighter, the flame casting a glow on his face and highlighting his features.
He inhaled, holding it for a few seconds before he exhaled with his head tilted back and his eyes closed. It was honestly the most mouthwatering sight you’d ever witnessed. Suddenly you had zero thoughts, just solely focused on Eren. “Mhm, it hurt but mostly during the healing process. I like pain though so I didn’t mind it.” Eren hummed.
His words broke you out of your sudden trance. “You like pain? That’s weird.” You said, not fully understanding how someone could enjoy pain. Eren chuckled, “Eh, it feels good. To me at least.” He said as he handed the joint to you. You tried to take a hit, immediately going into an embarrassing coughing fit. “That’s not how you do it sweetheart, you’re too harsh with it, relax I’ll help you.” Eren laughed softly.
Eren then grabbed the joint from your hands and held it up to your mouth. “Open.” He instructed, humming in approval once you listened. He gently placed the joint between your lips, holding it there. “Close and inhale slowly.” He continued. The two of you stared into each other’s eyes as Eren guided you step by step. This wasn’t your first time smoking at all but you liked how attentive Eren was, you couldn’t get enough of it.
“Hold it.” Eren hummed as he pulled the joint from between your lips. “Now exhale slowly.” He said, pressing his fingers into your slightly puffed out cheeks as you obediently exhaled the smoke into his face. “Good girl, such a good listener.” Eren praised again with a small grin as he gently stroked your chin, underneath your bottom lip.
You almost let out a whine at that, Eren’s words and his presence was starting to affect you more and more by the hour. You were trying your best to ignore it but you wanted him so badly that it was getting hard to contain. “What did I say about looking at me like that?. Little one..it’s like you’re trying to tempt me.” Eren said, his eyes low and holding a look that seemed as if he wanted to tear you apart.
Truth be told, Eren always wanted you. He always had his eye on you ever since Connie brought you around. He knew that he paid more attention to you than Connie ever did and that he could treat you better. But you were always glued to Connie so Eren never made any moves. He knew it was kinda fucked up to be interested in his bestfriend’s girl but he couldn’t care less. He was no better than Connie to be honest.
“I-I’m not! I don’t mean to look at you like that..I don’t even know how I’m looking at you.” You fumbled over your words as you blushed brightly. “You’re looking at me as if you want me to fuck the shit out of you. Is that what you want sweetheart? Want to feel me in your tummy?” Eren said, continuing to smoke nonchalantly as he stared at you. You whined at his lewd words, your thighs squeezing together.
“Don’t talk like that! that’s inappropriate, and I’m with Connie.” You exclaimed. Eren rolled his eyes, “I don’t need the reminder, I know that. You say it’s inappropriate but you’re clenching your thighs and whining like a slut at the thought of me inside you. You want it so badly, don’t you?. Want me to stuff your little cunt?” Eren teased.
You let out another whine, you were honestly so wet by now at his words. You felt so ashamed that you wanted another man, especially the man that was closest to your boyfriend. “eren…we can’t..” you muttered, tears filling your eyes as you pouted up at him. “shh, it’s okay little one. don’t think about Connie just for a minute and answer me. Do you want me?” Eren asked as he cupped your face gently.
You chewed on your lip as you nodded honestly in response. “Use your words for me baby.” Eren hummed as he lightly pulled at your bottom lip with his thumb. You let out a shaky breath, “I do want you…so badly.” you finally admitted truthfully as you looked into Eren’s eyes. He grinned hearing that. “I want you too baby, more than you even know. You wanna sit on my cock?” Eren hummed.
You nodded and basically pounced on him, as if you hadn’t had any restrictions about this whole thing at all. You suddenly didn’t care anymore as you climbed onto Eren’s lap, straddling him as the two of you began to kiss messily and needily. Eren gripped your hips as you began to grind down on him like you were in heat, whining and whimpering into his mouth.
You sucked on Eren’s tongue, making him groan and buck his hips up into yours. You were so wet that a wet spot was already starting to form on Eren’s sweats. “please~” You whined as you broke the kiss, your small hands tugging at the strings to Eren’s sweatpants eagerly. “you can go ahead baby” Eren hummed as he left opened mouth kisses on your neck.
You untied his sweats and pulled them down, his hard cock coming out dribbling precum. He was so big, veins running along the sides of his cock. You wanted to drool at the sight. Eren bunched your skirt up around your waist, pushing your panties aside before he began to run his tip up and down your slit. You were a whining mess, your thighs trembling already from how sensitive and needy you were.
“so fucking whiny and wet. You’re already soaking my cock pretty baby and I’m not even inside you yet.” Eren gritted out. You only whimpered in response, your nails digging into Eren’s shoulders. Eren positioned himself and pushed the tip in, letting you sink down onto his cock as the both of you moaned in unison.
“so big…” you whined shakily as Eren bottomed out. “Mhm, you feel me in your tummy baby?” Eren asked as he placed his hand on your stomach, pressing on the bulge imprint his dick made. you moaned at the feeling and nodded, your eyes fluttering shut as your pussy gushed around Eren’s cock. “fuck..” he swore under his breath.
Once you adjusted you began to ride Eren, bouncing on his cock effortlessly as you moaned and whined nonstop. Eren was just as noisy as you were, groaning into your neck as he licked and bit at your skin. “n-no marks ‘ren” you managed to stutter out in your already fucked out state. Eren didn’t like the sound of that at all, growling in response. He understood why you said that but he just didn’t care.
“You’re mine and I’ll mark you as much as I want to. Because to be quite honest sweetheart I don’t give two fucks about your little relationship.” Eren said honestly as he began to suck harsh bruises onto your neck. You whined, Eren’s words were shocking to you but they also turned you on so much that you couldn’t even bother to fight against it. Your fingers tangled in Eren’s hair as he marked you up like he had something to prove, sinking his teeth into you and making you hiss in pain.
“hurts~” You whimpered, tears in your eyes from the intense pleasure of Eren’s dick hitting your sweet spot at just the right angle and because of the stinging pain. “I know baby” Eren hummed as he ran his tongue along the bite marks and bruises to soothe the sting. “Feel so good around me sweet girl, should’ve fucked you sooner.” Eren moaned as he fucked up into you, matching your pace.
Eren bit his lip as he looked at where your bodies connected, the white ring around his cock and the amount of slick coating his trimmed pubic hairs. “shit..I don’t think I’m ever gonna pull out.” Eren muttered, mesmerized by the sight of your cunt swallowing up his thick cock. By now the car reeked of sex and weed, the windows were all fogged up, the radio was still playing sensual rnb tunes lowly in the background but you and eren had tuned it out at this point and neither of you had a clue what time it was.
“you gonna let me cum inside you baby?” Eren asked as he began to rub circles into your clit making you cry out in pleasure, your seamless bouncing stuttering a bit. “you shouldn’t..” You whined as you finally opened and focused your glazed over eyes enough to look at Eren. He looked delicious, his hair damp and the strands sticking to his forehead, his bun a complete mess from your constant tugging.
His lips swollen and red from the kissing and his work of marking you, your nails marks on his neck and shoulder blades, his pupils dilated and his eyes dazed. You couldn’t look away from him. “Mm, I shouldn’t but I want to so so badly. Wanna fill you up so good princess. You want that don’t you?” Eren said as he kissed your cheeks and pecked your lips. His sweet gentle kisses and tone of voice was such a contrast to how his dick was abusing your cervix and how his hands were gripping your hips hard enough to leave bruises.
It was making your mind all hazy and it wasn’t helping that your orgasm was approaching, that coil in your stomach tightening as Eren played with your clit. “I do wan’ it, want you to fill me up. Please~” You whined, your words slurring as you rocked your hips and clutched Eren’s shirt between your hands. The lewd wet sound of skin slapping and your combined moans filled the car. You looked even more fucked out than Eren did.
Thighs coated in both of your fluids, drool at the corner of your lips, eyes rolled and fluttering, head titled back with your hair sticking to you, hickies and bites covering your neck and collarbone, dried tears on your cheeks, clothes disheveled. Eren thought you looked beautiful and he was completely enamored by you. “fuck, you’re perfect. I’m gonna fill you up so full baby and I’m gonna make you mine. Fuck Connie.” Eren rambled as he fucked up into you.
Eren repositioned his arms underneath your knees, holding you up and sitting himself up further as he folded your legs up and pressed you against the steering wheel. the steering wheel pressing into your back was a bit uncomfy but the new angle Eren was fucking you in was heavenly, had you seeing stars. You don’t think you had ever been fucked this good, not even by your own boyfriend.
“m’ gonna cum~” You whined out, sobbing in pleasure and scratching down Eren’s back underneath his shirt as you felt your orgasm about to burst. “you can cum sweet girl, make a big mess for me.” Eren hummed as he placed kisses on your chest and boobs. Eren’s own orgasm was approaching too, his thrusts getting more uncoordinated and rougher as he chased it.
After a few more thrusts of Eren hitting that spot that made your toes curl, and the friction of his pubic hairs rubbing up against your clit you came with a loud moan of Eren’s name. Squirted all over him as your pussy clenched and unclenched around Eren’s cock. Eren groaned at the feeling, his eyes rolling back as he fucked you through your orgasm. “shitt sweetheart. so fucking messy, fuck!” Eren moaned as you soaked him in your climax.
It didn’t take long after for Eren to cum after you, whimpering into your neck as he filled you up with ropes and ropes of his cum. Eren hadn’t cum this much in his life, stuffing you to the brim as some of it poured out the seams. Eren’s thrusts slowed and he eased back into a proper seating position with you still sitting on his dick, twitching and whining as you were completely fucked out.
Eren took a moment to breathe and process the situation and you had dozed off, completely exhausted as you fell into a deep sleep on top of Eren. You looked so peaceful and cute it made Eren grin and he couldn’t help but to sneakily snap a picture of you before pecking your forehead. Eren checked the time and realized you two had been at it for almost three hours. It was 4 in the morning now.
“Jesus..you milked me dry little one.” Eren muttered while shaking his head. Eren started the car back up and began to drive, not bothering to move you or to pull out since he didn’t want to wake you. Eren knew he fucked up by sleeping with Connie’s girl but he couldn’t bring himself to regret a single second of it.
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shuttershocky · 1 year
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this overwatch 2 shit has GOT to be illegal right? I mean, they sold the game on the promise of PvE and now they cancel it. This better earn them a false advertising charge
And the wildest part is that you can't even play Overwatch 1 anymore.
Anyone who's followed this blog long enough has probably seen me post a rant about how terrible video games are at media preservation, and how we should preserve games (even ones we don't like) to be playable in some manner long after the developers take the servers offline because games are art and deserve to be able to be experienced by the future long after they've been discarded by their makers as a product.
You can't do that anymore with Overwatch 1, a game that wasn't even free to play.
People paid 40$ in 2016, 60$ if they went for the deluxe edition, to play Overwatch. New heroes, maps, etc were promised to come as free updates, instantly accessible for anyone to play without grinding or microtransactions (though there were mtx for cosmetics) and that the game would be supported for many years.
This was one of the many reasons why Overwatch back then absorbed a large part of TF2's playerbase: TF2 had been chugging along since 2007, at the 8-9 year point its updates were winding down and people have accepted it was finally hitting the end of tis life, and were looking for a new cartoon team shooter that would last for years. OW was not TF2's successor and was never intended to be, but that promise of many years of free support was a major part of why people gave it a chance just the same.
And then just 3 years later in 2019 they announced Overwatch 2, a game that looked really, really similar to Overwatch 1, except it was going to have the actual story missions via PvE mode that Overwatch 1 didn't have. They said there would be enough new things to justify the '2', and that people who bought Overwatch 1 need not worry about their investment in the first game.
And then it turned out what they meant by that was that they were killing Overwatch 1 by closing its servers, forcing everyone to move over to Overwatch 2, a Free to Play game where you had to grind to unlock the new heroes (people who bought OW1 instantly had the new hero unlocked but come on), was chock full of the usual Free to Play engagement mechanics, and changed the 6v6 format to 5v5, if you had a full squad of friends before, you had to tell one guy to get fucked.
I think the worst part was that when people were understandably angry that Overwatch 2's actual changes from the original were almost all monetization based, games journalists that pressed Blizzard on why players now had to grind a battlepass for heroes, which Overwatch 1 had always given for free, were met with a "well, heroes are the strongest engagement point for our players" type of deflection where they didn't even try to hide their reasons behind something respectable.
Now they're announcing that OW2's PvE mode, the whole (public) reason they made OW2 a sequel instead of an update to OW1, isn't even happening anymore, and Overwatch 1's original 6v6 remains dead and inaccessible.
I didn't like Overwatch 1. I was really hyped for it when it came out, but found myself really disliking the gameplay (especially on its map design which I thought was terrible) which only worsened with its creative and balancing direction until I lost interest in only a few weeks.
Still, killing OW1 to force all players to move to OW2's free to play model was inexcusable. All art must be preserved in some manner, even ones we don't think are good enough to be worth preserving. Overwatch in particular was so massive in 2016-2018 that to kill it is to make inaccessible the source material of a kajillion other pieces of art from those years.
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runaeveena · 4 months
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Your dashboard if you were in a d&d fantasy world still involved in fictional erotica discourse part 2
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⛰️ berenicesblade Follow
now that the new Mountain Angel volume has come out can we please tag spoilers, some of us are still waiting for our pigeon mail
🦚 faeynadaughter Follow
you can access the volume in full on TomePlane!
🎭 bardcampistrash Follow
until TomePlane acknowledges that its interplanar storage is made possible by binding aboleths to the plane and killing them then we are going to continue not using that platform, thanks
🦚 faeynadaughter Follow
aboleths killed my cousin who was a royal cleric. ill never understand why theres a whole movement to protect abyssal creatures when theyve caused so much damage to our kingdoms. and disliking a pocket dimension which provides thousands of people access to books? your attitude reeks of anti literaturism and mal-aligned virtue signaling and im not sure which is worse
🫒 tenthday237 Follow
Aliizya gets pregnant on page 62
⛰️ berenicesblade Follow
banished
620 Notes
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🏰 finchtruther Follow
okay but the way that faelor finch writes every song that perfectly fits pennbiel liiike its giving closet fangirl
🧭 waywardwarlock
seriouslyy!! like what else is "give me your unmarked hand / in the shadowfell we won't be a secret" supposed to be about if not pennipher and corabiel
16 Notes
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🌫️ cloudgiant-snailboy Follow
yall please dont fill up the unseen servant tag with your super fucking weird smut posts im just looking for tips on how to find my unseen servant
🪡 scç-writer
the search function on tomeblr does need to be updated but we dont have to kinkshame :)
🌫️ cloudgiant-snailboy Follow
the site is being overrun by virgin degenerates
🍯 treebarkhookhandwagondoor
sounds like you need Wilam the Wizard with Wandering Hands to help you summon the unseen stick in your ass
290 Notes
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🗝️ crypt-princess Follow
so whose going to be the first to commission a painting of that scene with Aliizya and the beholder 👀
🍎 bloodmaledickening Follow
i already asked my local artisan he said he's gotten two other commissions for the same scene lmao
🐁 softbarbarian
girl i commissioned a tapestry
45 Notes
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🕯️ andersfirelight Follow
friendly reminder that devil deals are a real thing that a lot of people fall victim too and that demons are malicious and do destroy peoples lives if theyre not careful so please be careful when consuming works like Hellionfinity which romanticizes devil deals and fiendish soul contracts
🌾entangled-farmer Follow
imo any work of fiction that involves a romance between any type of fiend is not just problematic but harmful
🕯️ andersfirelight Follow
i used to be indifferent to books that had devil romance interests because like thats their whole thing theyre seducing people to get their souls and the mc overcomes it, but reading through the replies i see that Hellionfinity actually ends with the devil character as the main romantic lead which is super problematic in terms of power imbalance and the fact that he has a redemption arc is so out of touch especially since our military is finally recovering from the azgurian assault
🧚🏻‍♂️arms-of-faelor
helliofinity also has a scene where the main character uses a soul coin that an imprisoned mortal gave him and he uses it to bring the devil out of avernus so he doesnt fully die and no one in the book mentions it or talks about how messed up it is to use soul coins and we never see the now bound to hell prisoner ever again
🕯️ andersfirelight Follow
hellionfinity officially cancelled on my end!
88 Notes
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☘️ celest-ial Follow
moment of silence for all the customers waiting on drink orders while the tavern wench gets her back blown out by a new guy every night ✊😔
🦁 king-killa Follow
the gods work hard but Girthy Gladys gets worked harder
57,022 Notes
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🎲 beholdersbeholdingme
paladin and warlock romances are OUT! cleric and necromancer romances are IN!
🪭 royalcoinpurse Follow
the only thing a cleric should do to a necromancer is beat him to death so she can revive him and kill him again
🎲 beholdersbeholdingme
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❇️ arch-dryad Follow
i think we need to analyze why we're so quick to place women in categories of devious seductress or healer in romance novels as if that hasnt been the pervasive trope that holds magic-touched women back in our actual society
🍯 treebarkhookhandwagondoor
why do you assume these fictional tropes are mf couples only? can a gay cleric not beat his gay necromancer boyfriend to death?
🎲 beholdersbeholdingme
and off! beat him off cmon guys
5,275 Notes
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🧀 weremouse Follow
yall ever be talking or whatnot and feel like no one understands you
🪨 sebrenenogdon Follow
ᛄᚠ ᛡᚢ ᚳᚪᚾ ᚱᛁᛞ ᚦᛄᛋ ᛡᚢ ᚺᚪᚠ ᛏᚢ ᚱᛁᛒᛚᚪᚷ ᚦᛄᛋ
🧀 weremouse Follow
say that shit fr (<- looking around clueless)
🪨 sebrenenogdon Follow
ᛋᛁᚱᛁᚪᛋᛚᛁ
60 Notes
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🌠 crownofstars
remember when that person made a call out post for the author of ilairepeler for using a ghost writer and it turned out the author was an actual ghost. writing. like a literal ghost writer. like.
🍄gnomestool Follow
arent you the dwarf that fucked a slaad
🌠 crownofstars
how would you like to become a ghost so you can write more witty comments like this for eternity
301 Notes
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cerastes · 29 days
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Hot take perhaps, I hope not: If fandom is ruining your enjoyment of a game, that’s a skill issue on your part. You let the way others go about the game affect your own approach to the game. You let that happen. When you reproach the fandom and say they are why you can’t enjoy something the same way anymore, you are essentially admitting you didn’t really have too strong of an opinion or approach to the game in the first place, and it had to be fed to you.
It also may be that you are not enjoying the community aspect of the game anymore, which should be a different statement altogether. Plus, community is something you can find or, with more effort, make.
I say this as someone who dislikes fandom 99% of the time. I just feel like this whole thing is just people being bitter about something very easily corrected most of the time, and feels like “you unwashed masses aren’t enjoying this the right way and it’s beneath me” which… Ok, but that’s a you problem and no one really has an obligation or incentive to yearn for the implicit approval you are making manifest is being denied.
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