the reason why you can't define gay as "man loving man", or define lesbian as "woman loving woman", or define trans as "person who has dysphoria and identifies as the 'opposite' gender " is because all queer identities defy being defined in a reductive, singular statement. the entire point of these identities are that they cannot fit inside the rigid boxes of what gender, sexuality & expression "should" be according to our societies.
people with these identities will always break the rules. we will always blur the lines and exist outside of the boundaries you set around us. you can't try to force us into boxes and hard definitions all over again, we intrinsically defy them no matter what.
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Would you mind if I didn’t wear undies?
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being trans is so fucking expensive no matter how you identify, epecially if you're dysphoric and pursue social and/or medical transition. name changes. hormones. hormone blockers. surgeries. shaving products. the Pink Tax on everything feminine. makeup. starting your wardrobe over from scratch. finding clothes that don't make you feel like you wanna crawl out of your own skin, but also fit you. prescriptions, vitamins, lotions, surgery recovery supplies, and supplements to assist with medical transition. binding, tucking, and packing supplies. facial/body reconstruction procedures. laser hair removal. hair re/growth medications. breastforms. the list just goes on and on. we have to pay in order to be ourselves in the most extreme ways possible. there's a tax on gender & biological sex.
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while i get where this comes from and it’s true to an extent, i reeeaaaally don’t like how people try to explain “trans men don’t [necessarily] have male privilege” with things like “some trans men don’t pass”.
like sure that’s the most obvious example (someone who is seen as a woman won’t have the privilege that comes with being seen a man) but you’re still acting like being a passing trans man is just a free opt-in to male privilege which is………kinda the issue.
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All Trans men are men, but not all Trans men aren’t women.
All Trans women are women, but not all Trans women aren’t men.
Gender can be far more complex and less binary for many folks 💗
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