#tw risky behavior

[anthromimicry]

you know, i never thought i would say this, but i think misao and one of my other characters (barton) actually DO have something in common. and that is that they are the kind of person to do something extremely risky, like chase painkillers with alcohol, but whenever someone else tries to do it especially if they are one of their loved ones, then they are basically the embodiment of this meme:

and then they immediately try to STOP them like they didn't just do the same exact thing that was on the borderline of being almost self-injurious with how reckless it was. like, UMMM idk whether to just be genuinely concerned for these two or to reacquaint them with the reasoning behind why doing that is SUCH a bad idea 😭

[ritzcrackee]

guys what if i wanted a love that fell as fast as a body from a balcony. what then

[acabspocky]

TW: Disordered Eating

No because whether you agree with the existence of edtwt or not, going out of your way to make comments like this is disgusting

1) You don't just find edtwt and/or disordered content easily on accident, especially on Twitter (or Tumblr for that matter) The majority of edtwt goes out of our way to avoid making contact with "regular" twitter.

So finding a post to make these comments under is a conscious decision, you have to go out of your way to look for it.

2) 90% of edtwt is just mentally ill people seeking a space to vent or joke safely about mental illness with other mentally ill people without judgement. We're not some cult of Goddess Ana Acolytes spreading proana gospel; we're sharing memes/jokes (a lot like the above post) harm reduction, low cal recipes, vent threads, food polls, protein bar reviews, and people begging for tips n tricks to help them poop— yes, we swap poop tips like baseball cards, I shit you not (🥁 pun intended)

So comments like "a billion gigillion calories, big and greedy," are on par with sitting outside of an Narcotics Anonymous meeting and handing out nicklebags of Down; you're obviously not trying to help anyone, you're just getting a laugh at the expense of someone who is likely a victim of trauma/abuse.

I really try to keep my disordered shit separate from this blog, so I'm sorry but I am so fucking heated rn. Literally simmering.

[hitoshisbf]

Ya'll we really be havign a smirnoff rn with an ativan.

[blarshwritezz]

Yandere Clone x Reader

Male Yan x gn reader

TW - general yandere behavior, torture, manipulation

Clone!Yan wasn't even supposed to exist. If only your boyfriend had never agreed to that stupid experiement.

It was sketchy, but paid hella good money, and the two of you were going through hard times. You guys really needed the cash. Especially since he was starting to consider proposing.

You told him it was too risky. You told him there were much better ways to make money. Safer ways. But he was blinded by all those zeros. 10 million sure does motivate someone. Even you were considering joining in too.

The day he left for it, you nearly cried. It's been a long time since you had to spend a night without him.

But finally, he came back a week later! Something was just...different. When he held you, he seemed stronger than usual. He seemed to blink less, and stare at you more. He was getting very jealous very easily. Sure he had some slight jealousy issues before he went off, but it wasn't ever this bad...

At first, you considered it side effects of whatever those awful people did, or that it was just because he missed you. But it only seemed to get worse...

You'd notice him eating less, exercising less, doing everything he usually did less...

He used the money from the experiment to buy the two of you a lovely little home somewhere peaceful. Nothing fancy, the two of you didn't need too much. Just a quaint little home in the suburbs.

In that home, you realized there was always this suspicious locked room. When you asked him about it, he just said, "Oh, that? Yeah, I think it's pretty weird too. I guess the previous owners just locked it and forgot to give us the key."

Lately, he's seemed pretty dismissive when you were worried.

But some nights, you swore you heard strange noises coming from that room. Things like scratching, muffled screams, faint groans, and even whispers of your name.

One night, you had enough. It was one of those rare nights where your boyfriend would get up, presumably to use the restroom or get a glass of water, and not return for over an hour.

Silently, you crept down the hall. The door to that room was slightly ajar, the light of the moon peaking out. You got just close to peak in and what you saw was not only horrifying but confusing as well.

There was your boyfriend, holding a bloody pen, standing above...himself? But a grotesque and mutilated version of himself.

You backed away in horror, only to crash into something behind you, making a loud noise. Nearly instantly, your "boyfriend" was at the door staring at you.

"Oh dear, my lovely [Y/N]...you weren't supposed to see this yet. It was going to be a surprise." The man spoke, a twisted grin on his face. "I guess now I have to tell you early."

He grabbed your arm and dragged you into the room. No matter how much you struggled, no matter how strong you were, he was more powerful. His bruising grip could have broken your bone, but he was being oh so careful with you.

"You see, my dearest, this man you called your boyfriend was just pathetic...he didn't have the balls to give you everything you deserve. But I can. I can be perfect for you. I'm him, but better in every way." He whispered, his cold breath against your neck as he held you tight and forced you to look at the man who could hardly be recognized as your sweet boyfriend.

"I won't ever age, or change, or ever go against you. Why, I was made for you..."

You were so confused, and he could tell. But your words were stuck in your throat. It was a good thing he could read you so well.

"Don't you remember? All those months ago, the experiment? The scientists who created me needed a dumb test monkey down on their luck, and your old boyfriend was perfect for that role. They took his skin, his blood, his hair, every bit of DNA they could to make me. The only thing missing was the transference of subconscious, and well, the only thing he could think of was you. So naturally, the only thing I can think of, is you~"

He wrapped his artificial arms around your waist tightly, making sure you didn't fall over. You felt like you would be sick...

"Unfortunately, I have to keep him alive. If he dies, I will too. But I recently decided to take out his eyes. That way he'll never get to see you again. Only I should have such an honor."

He started kissing your neck, making you feel even more disgusted. Right in front of you was your beloved boyfriend, the very one you hoped to spend your life with, turned to this shell of what he once was. You could hardly even see his skin tone beneath all the blood.

"Don't worry, just rest. You'll never have to see that failure again..." With those last few words, he covered your mouth with a cloth. You were already paralyzed in fear, too terrified to fight back this time.

He watched you for the rest of the night...and the next day...and the next night, and the next day, and the next night. Never once were you free from the thing that claimed to be your boyfriend.

Or rather, husband now. He was so glad you finally agreed! Not that you had much of a choice.

Yea, feeling this one! Different style than usual, woo!

[allur1ngs]

✮ the glasses stay on✮

tw: unedited, smut, oral--r!receiving, possessive!bada, a bit of jealous!bada, bada's a teeny bit mean (not rlly she says sorry right after), bada wears her glasses while she eats you out, bada eats it through your panties and uses your panties to get you off, pussy slapping...., panty stealing, sex in bada's office & on her desk, ass grabbing, risky sex--possibility of getting caught

a/n: ib this and this ask, this one has a bit of an intro before going straight into the smut, and once again i'm telling everyone to say ty to my wife @bebeyue bcs without her motivation i would not be writing this😚🩷

Tick tick ticking, every second that passes by winds into an endless staircase of lost time. Bada stares down at her Cartier wristwatch with a mix of distain and guilt.

The hour hand on the clock reminds her that it's five in the afternoon, and she's completed little-to-none of the high-stacking papers in front of her. Truly, it's not Bada's fault. Although she can usually sit in her office and read documents for hours on end with little difficulty--beyond the annoyance that settles in after the third or fourth hour--for some reason, today she simply can't will herself to pick up her black and gold fountain pen, and read or sign any paperwork.

"Something's off." She thinks to herself, slowly picking her gaze up from her watch and staring at the blotted black words in front of her. "There's something I can't seem to get my mind off of, but at the same time I don't know what I'm thinking about--"

Like divine and heavenly intervention, the answer comes to her in the form of a beautiful woman entering her office...you.

"Hope I'm not interrupting you." You quietly creep into Bada's office, with a smile. Your eyes, which had only swept over her quickly when you entered, now take in her full figure, which surprises you.

Rather than wearing her normal black suit jacket and tie, she's wearing a light blue button-up shirt with red and blue stripes running across it, and her hair is tied up into a ponytail braid, wisps of her long side bangs frame her face, making her face shape look sharper.

"You're looking extra good today." You comment, walking up to Bada's desk with your hands behind your back.

"Oh," your fiancée breathes, suddenly finding it hard to concentrate, Her eyes are fixated on your outfit, which is a cute blouse and a short skirt. The lack of fabric allows her to eye the creamy skin of your legs with a hungry gaze. "Thank you. I noticed it was hot in the morning so I decided to wear a looser shirt."

"Well I love it." You say cheekily. Walking around Bada's desk, she immediately scoots her chair back, making space for you to stand in front of her. "I brought you something, by the way."

Your words make Bada look up at you, to which you take your hands from behind your back and open your palm, revealing a pair of silver-framed aviator glasses.

"I couldn't find your usual glasses--"

"I broke them while out on a mission." Bada gives you a sheepish look.

"That explains it then." You laugh. "But that doesn't give you an excuse to not wear your glasses."

"I'm sorry." Bada pouts. She takes her spare glasses from the palm of your hand and puts them on, then suddenly wraps her arms around waist and pulls you into her, pushing her head into your midsection.

You let out an instinctive gasp, but place your hands on top of her head nevertheless.

"Let me make it up to you?" She mumbles into your shirt, dragging her hands from your waist to your ass, grabbing them roughly before she gives them a squeeze.

"Bada--" You exclaim, surprised at her lustful behavior. "Where is this coming from--?"

"I can't focus on my work." Your fiancée huffs. She starts to grope at your ass more, pressing her head against your stomach even more. "Especially not now that you've walked in with this short skirt."

Bada suddenly pulls her head from your midsection, but moves her hands back to your hips to keep you at an arm's length distance. She bunches up the fabric of your skirt, slowly raising it farther and farther up your thigh, until the bottom of your skirt just barely covers your panty-covered pussy.

You take in a sharp breath, your body reacting to her touch by shivering.

"Did you wear this on purpose?" Bada hums, toying with your skirt but never completely flipping it upward...yet.

"Like you said, it's hot." You whisper, placing your hands on her shoulders. "I wanted to wear something fresher."

"But did you have to wear such a short skirt?" Bada looks up at you, smirking as she finally flips up the fabric of your skirt, revealing your panties, which are noticeably damp. "Oh, what's this?" She says, her voice low and cocky. She drags her finger up and down your slit, making more slick pool against the lace of your panties.

"Bada...we shouldn't." You whisper, but your body and heart betrays you. You start to roll your hips against your fiancée's fingers, hoping to get more pressure against your pussy.

"I don't know, it looks like you want it." Bada cocks her head to the side, hearing the way your breath hitches when she moves her fingers along your panties. "Do you want it? Do you want me to fuck you here, in my office, when any of the girls could walk in and see us?"

You gasp at her words, glancing at the door instinctively...but you don't stop grinding your hips against her digits.

Bada watches you with amused dark brown eyes. She huffs a laugh, "Do you like that idea? You want to get caught by the girls and let them see how promiscuous you are?"

You hesitate to answer, far too embarrassed to speak your mind--

"Say something." Bada pulls her fingers away from pussy, staring up at you with domineering look.

"...I--I don't want to get caught." You breathe, lies staining your tongue.

"Really?" Bada's voice pitches upwards in doubt. "Are you lying to me?"

You look away from your fiancée in shame. "N--"

"You know I don't like it when you lie." Bada suddenly uses her strength to push you down on her spread legs, making you let out a surprised noise. "But either way, it doesn't matter. I won't let anyone see you like this, whether you want them to or not."

She takes ahold of your legs and makes sure they're wound tightly around her waist. She starts to drag her chair closer to her desk until your ass is against it, then she pushes you down until your back lays on the desk.

Bada looks down at you, splayed across her desk like an angel--a sinful, debauched angel--but an angel no less. Her mind, which had once been foggy immediately clears into one single, concise thought. "I need her."

Bada leans down to capture your lips in a heated, and passionate dance. It's all tongue--your teeth clash against each other as your fiancée swirls her tongue against yours. At the same time, she pulls at your shirt, only breaking away from your lips to rasp out, "Take it off," in a demanding tone.

You stare into her eyes for a split second before you sit up, taking the ends of your shirt, lifting it upward, and off of you. You're left in only a bra, which makes Bada hiss in satisfaction.

She presses another kiss on your lips, laying you back down on the desk once again, before she begins her descent downwards.

Bada moves under your skirt, and hoping to give her more access you try to remove it, but she immediately stops you.

"Don't." She says, using one of her hands to pin down both of yours. "I like it." She smiles, taking the fabric between her fingers and rubbing it. "You look so pretty in it."

You don't fight against your fiancée, you allow her to touch you through your panties, cruelly giving you the mildest amount of pleasure so that you release slick, but aren't satisfied.

"Bada, you're being mean." You huff, wrapping your legs around her head in hopes of pushing her head closer to your cunt.

"I know." She says cheekily. "But you lied to me, so I think I'm going to have some fun with you."

And have fun she does.

Bada latches her mouth onto your panty-covered pussy in a sudden surge forward. She laps her tongue up and down your slit, just barely rubbing against your clit which makes you let out a loud, blissful sigh and half moan.

She rubs her nose against your folds--the combination of glass and silver frames of her aviators are cold--the temperature difference in comparison to your hot pussy makes it clench around nothing. Bada quickly flattens her tongue as she continues to practically slobber all over your panties. Your juices and her saliva ruin the lace, making them a sopping wet mess.

You start to let out increasingly loud moans, even the simplest of Bada's touches making you cry out for more.

"You're being so loud." She mumbles into your pussy. The words rumble against your skin, which gives you muffled pleasure. "I'm starting to think you really do want us to get caught."

You toss your head to the side, looking away from her. "I-I don't."

"There you go again." Bada tuts. She pulls away from your pussy and grabs the edges of your panties. She brings both sides together, creating a thin line of lace that she uses to rub against your clit. The action gives you a delicious amount of pleasure, your mouth falling open as a loud moan leaves your lips. "Do you enjoy lying to me?"

Up and down she moves the lace, using her fingers to separate your folds so she can properly see the way your pussy clenches, pulses, and releases endless amounts of slick.

"Should I make you cum like this? Make you fucking cum all over your panties as punishment?" Her tone takes a stern pitch, the sound of it making you wetter, but at the same time nervous.

"No." You protest, shaking your head side to side. "Please--"

Bada's strong composure shatters at your whines. She can't help but wear a fond smile as she looks down at you, small tears of frustration building in the corner of your eyes. "Don't cry, honey." She cooes, placing her thumb under your eyes to wipe away to clear droplets. "I'm sorry baby, I'm not mad at you. I'll make you feel good--always."

You sniffle a bit, but start to steady your breathing--wide eyes blown as you turn your head to place a kiss on the palm of her hand, silently saying, "I know."

Bada gives you one last fond look before she drags her nose down your stomach, until she reaches that sweet spot between your legs. Mesmerized, she leans down to collect your juices, moving your panties completely to the side to give her unencumbered access to your cunt. She presses her mouth up against it, her glasses bumping into the hood pussy. You watch with bated breath as she once again flattens her hot tongue, giving you one long lick before she dives right in.

Bada moves her head side to side along with her tongue, rubbing your clit deliciously. She catches the skin of your lips and sensually pulls them, then sucks hard on your pussy like it's a lollipop.

"Bada," you somehow manage to choke through your heaving breaths.

She hums against your cunt, the vibrations sending a wave of pleasure up your spine and throughout your entire body.

"Your glasses."

"What about them?" She says, briefly breaking away from your pussy.

"You're going to break them--" looking downward, you would have been able to see your fiancée is staring at you through the hoods of her eyes--her gaze is unwavering, confident, and hypnotic.

But you can't see her eyes because her silver aviator glasses are foggy. They're entirely marked with perspiration, Bada's hot breaths catching against the sticky glass and clinging to it like a lifeline.

Still, as alluring and sensual that image is, the nail in the coffin is the globs of your juices dripping from the edge of Bada's glasses. They come together around the middle of the frames until they make a large dot, then drop down onto your fiancée's pink lips, where she quickly darts her tongue out to lick your saccharine slick into her mouth.

"The glasses stay on." She asserts, giving you one last, unseeable look before she attaches her lips onto your pussy again.

It's ridiculous, really. If you're unable to see Bada's eyes through her glasses, then they were entirely useless sitting on the bridge of her nose--she most likely couldn't even see through them.

But nevertheless, she fucks her tongue into you, drives it in and out of your hole, licks and swirls your clit into her mouth until you're screaming in pleasure, her glasses foggy dripping with your essence as she makes you cum.

Sucking on you one last time, Bada finally pulls away at the sound of your broken whines. She lets out a long breath, a smile instantly forming on her lips as she uses the back of her hand to wipe away the remnants of your orgasm from her lips. She licks it all up like it's a valuable liquid--the elixir of life.

Only then does she take her glasses off--well, she hangs them from the unbuttoned collar of her shirt--as she leans forward, giving your cunt an affectionate slap.

You let out a cute "ouch!" then glare at your fiancée, who only laughs in response.

"Sorry, couldn't help myself." She says sweetly.

"I think you could have." You huff, moving to sit up from Bada's desk.

She chuckles under her breath, before quickly taking ahold of your panties and slipping them off your legs. "Thank you for that." She grins. "I think I can finally focus."

You can't help but laugh as well, "Okay, I'll get going then." You hold out your hand and give Bada an expectant look.

She only stares at you with a cheeky smile. "What?"

You furrow your eyebrows and push out your hand further. "My panties?"

"Oh, these?" Bada holds up your lace panties, her saliva and a mixture of your cum making it wad together into a dripping mess. "I think I'll keep them." She suddenly shoves them into her pocket, completely unbothered by the fact that they'll surely dampen the fabric.

"Bada!" You exclaim, your mouth falling open in shock.

"What, you wanted to wear them?" She smirks. "They're ruined." Taking a step forward, she looms over your figure still perched on her desk, and leans in to speak right into the shell of your ear. "Come find me in a few hours after I've finished my work, and maybe I'll think about giving them back."

taglist:

@aericrys, @somerandomtinyperson, @bluebada, @dallaji, @luvjanexx, @hyejuwu, @diana-rose-25, @jjlovesbada, @prilux, @youknow1234, @fae-the-wanderer, @mightymyo, @aein-tings, @badasgirlfriend, @onlyyou-metanoia, @wiselight, @badasoneandonly @multiliker, @badabonita, @randomhoex, @justaharmlesspotat0, @sporadicfacebasement, @4bada, @seungxstar, @urlovebot, @neuftaeng, @hyunsllvr, @aixicl, @itzmy, @badasgff, @mikaleialt, @tthe-dark-ssoul, @m0r0s1111, @phoxey, @taruusmoon, @lovebtsforever24, @moonsvrse

(if your name is crossed out i wasn't able to to tag you)

want to join the taglist? send me a message or comment saying you'd like to be on it (or be removed from it), and i'll do so immediately!

[animeyanderelover]

Characters of your choice from JJK with a darling who has a tattoo of their ex please

Holidays, everyone! I finally have my holidays! I changed it slightly so that the darling has a tattoo of the name of their ex.

Tw: Yandere themes, toxic relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional thoughts, clinginess, manipulation, controlling behavior, forceful behavior, death

S/o has a tattoo of the name of their ex

Fushiguro Megumi

💙You have never told him of your tattoo before, aware how paranoid Megumi tends to be. Perhaps that would have been the wiser choice yet instead he discovers the name engraved on your skin himself as you fail to cover the name on your shoulder in time as he accidentally walks in on you changing. Thick silence befalls the room as he just stands there, frozen as his eyes are glued to the black kanji signs on your skin. His mind repeats the name over and over again until he suddenly remembers where he has heard it before. His heart drops, a lumb of fear and insecurities forms at the back of his throat and his eyes widen frantically. You try to come up with something, anything to explain this to him yet he is faster. Suddenly he stands in front of you, arms seizing your shoulders as he asks you with a slightly raised voice why you never told him that you had a tattoo of your ex. Why?? Why would you do that?? Were...were they that important to you? What about him then?

💙He can't bear to look at you the same way as before after that for quite some while, not without imagining the name of your ex tattooed on your shoulder. It's like a marking that spells out that you once loved someone else and whenever he actually sees your tattoo, he feels something clenching deep inside his chest. His insecurities and paranoia increase as he starts wondering if you still harbor feelings for your ex. Going as far as carrying a tattoo of their name around is a pretty big sign of devotion after all. You find yourself having a harder time to calm him down, the tattoo on your shoulder triggering him whenever he catches a glimpse of it. It haunts him, torments him a bit and he has wondered a couple of times already if he has to threaten your ex as paranoia poisons his ability to think rationally and instead whispers into his mind that you might return to your ex. He knows that it isn't good for his sanity which is why at some point he begs you to remove it somehow. Please, it torments him.

Zenin Maki

💚​Maki has known about your tattoo for a longer while now, it's hard to hide something written on your wrist with black and permanent ink after all. She already questioned this decision of yours back then quite a bit because it's quite risky to get a tattoo of the name of your ex without any guarantee that they'll stay. All you could do back then was to give her a pitiful laugh as you couldn't help but agree with her. Back then this was still fine though but now it is a different story as she's grown rather possessive over you. The tattoo is an eyesore for her whenever she sees it and due to the visible spot you chose, she sees it multiple times a day. She lets out a scoff whenever her eyes find the kanji signs and her mood is almost always worsening a tad bit whenever she spots the name of your former lover. At least she is reasonable enough to understand that both of you have broken it up for good so she isn't as wavering and paranoid as Megumi. She knows that you don't have any feelings for them anymore.

💚​That doesn't mean that she hasn't completely forgiven you for your stupidity to get a tattoo in the first place. In fact she is scolding you more nowadays for your decision than before. Maki knows that you regret that mistake yourself but she can't help it sometimes, she is a bit mad and tends to express that with not so kind words. At the very least she notices that her words only cause you to feel worse so she tries to comfort you as good as she can everytime her tongue slips and she accidentally cuts you with her words. She makes it very clear to you though that she greatly dislikes that you have the name of someone else decorating your body whilst you're together with her and you can't even blame her for it. She would appreciate for you to somehow get rid of this tattoo and sometimes you have the feeling that her wish sounds more like a demand.

Gojo Satoru

🩵​It's perhaps not the best idea to let Gojo ever find out about your tattoo but how is that even supposed to work? The man is so terribly clingy and intrusive and despite his goofy facade, you have a feeling that he might react very badly to the sight of your tattoo. You try to figure out a way how to tell him as harmlessly as possible but you can't come up with anything. Maybe it wouldn't have made a difference in the first place. That's at least what you think as you try to wiggle free from his unusually tight grip, one of his hands lifting up your shirt as dull blue eyes stare at the name written slightly above your hip. Your breath hitches in your throat when those same blue eyes finally meet your own and you feel like you could drown within the abyss of the darkness swirling behind those beautiful orbs. A forced smile stretches his face as he asks you why you have someone's name tattooed on your body. Especially that of your ex.

🩵​You have a hard time convincing him not to go after your ex as your gut screams at you that something terribly will happen otherwise. You beg him to have mercy since both of you have ended the relationship years ago and you don't even have any contact with them anymore. You swallow heavily when his heavy and colder gaze rests on you yet still plead him to not do anything to them as you promise to do whatever he wants. Your wish is somewhat granted as Gojo doesn't harm them but he still wants to have seen the person whose name stains your skin at least once. Needless to say, he is disappointed when he sees your ex who is in his eyes a nobody but perhaps that reassures him a tiny bit. He can't help but torment and scare the poor soul though and they don't know even why. He organizes an appointment for you where the tattoo will be completely removed and only after that he seems to return to his usual self, happily kissing the now empty spot on your skin.

Kamo Choso

🩸​Choso is absolutely attached to your hips. He's needy, soft-spoken, careful and surprisingly considerate. If he wouldn't have been your kidnapper and creepy stalker, you might have appreciated him more though. There is something about him that sometimes just unsettles you and he himself doesn't even seem to notice when he's creeping you out until he witnesses your reaction. You don't even notice him until you feel his fingertips brushing against your skin and nearly jump out of your skin, turning bewildered around to see Choso staring at the same spot where your tattoo was only a few moments ago. He doesn't move as he now stares into empty air as if trying to process something until dark eyes finally meet your own. He swallows before apologizing that he just walked in on you without telling you anything. A few seconds of silence before you hear him asking you once again, this time in a slightly shaky tone, what that was he just saw on your back.

🩸​It's like Choso initially refuses to believe that a tattoo is something permanent as he rejects the thought that you will walk around with a name of your ex-lover forever engraved onto your being. You wake sometimes up in the middle of the night only to feel his hand rubbing against the tattoo as if trying to erase it himself, you notice the way his hands start trembling when he realizes that the ink doesn't fade away even a tiny bit and pray that he won't have a meltdown. Choso would never blame you for it but that means that his hostility is turned against your ex as he starts genuinely believing that they tricked you and manipulated your feelings, abused your kindness which is why you were fooled into getting such a tattoo. He never goes out to kill them though, only because you stop him though and successfully manage to coax him into not doing such a thing and instead he just clings onto you. He asks you anxiously more than once if there is a way to get rid of the tattoo and you know that it's probably the best way to preserve his sanity somehow.

Mahito

🔷​Good luck in general with Mahito because that is a recipe for disaster anyways. Mahito's perception of love differs greatly and is much more twisted and warped than anything and in his eyes he wouldn't even label his feelings as love. He likes to view you more as a sweet experiment, an interesting specism he just likes to spend time with whilst poking and tormenting you to gauge all of your reactions. The best you can do is try to endure it without giving him too much of a reaction because the bastard loves seeing you respond strongly to anything he does. Unfortunately you don't react quite as level-headed as you would like to have when he notices the dark ink on your legs and suddenly yanks you towards him, his hands roughly holding your leg, unimpressed by the way you're kicking and hissing at him. Cold fingers brush over the lettering on your skin, mismatched eyes curiously go back and forth between your eyes and the dark ink on your thigh before he asks you what this is.

🔷​He's genuinely interested to hear your reasons why you would decide to have the name of your ex tattooed on your skin and it is hard for you to tell if he is angry at all about it or not. He's definitely mocking and degrading you though as he labels you stupid for doing something like this despite never having known if they would actually stay with you. His fingers are still tracing over the tattoo and when he suddenly falls quiet for a while, you realize that he's thinking about something. Then he suddenly asks you if you just feel better if you have someone's name on your body which successfully makes you feel like you belong to someone. You're offended by his words but he doesn't give you time to answer as a grin suddenly flashes across his face, his grip tightening as he says with an excited tone that he wants to see his name on your skin too. You can't do anything but watch as your leg deforms in a grotesque way before returning to it's normal form. Your previous tattoo has disappeared and instead the kanji signs now read Mahito's name. Do you want more~?

[magics-neptunes-things]

Kiss Me More

Hi guys :)

I had a request for the last chapter for the serie "Kiss Me", so here it is :)

I hope it will suits you, dear anon.

Enjoy ♥

TW : Mention of cheating

PART 1 | PART 2

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Being Katie McCabe’s girlfriend is something you were hoping to be for several weeks before it happens. You both needed a little of adjustment at first, Katie was sometimes a little bit reluctant to pass to much time with you. You were hurt at first, thinking that she finally wasn’t interested to the idea of making things with you. When she realized that she hurt you, you had an explanation, where she basically told you that she didn’t want things to go to fast. Because a part of her was always scared of something going wrong or something.

You were great now, she isn’t the most demonstrative person in the world, at least when you are not alone. You can live with that actually, both of you decided to hide your relationship to the public for now. Not all of your teammates know about your relationship, but the ones who are your friends know.

Katie makes a point to let you understand that she is in charge in this relationship, but as bossy as she wants to be, you can only see how much she looks for you. When you are not coming to work together, she always waits for you in the locker room to have her kiss before going to training. When you are eating with other of your teammates at the training facilities, she always sneaks her chocolate to you. And you can say that she remembers everything you tell her.

Your favorite chocolate, your favorite flower, your favorite color, the name of the cat you had when you were a kid, where you like to go for a walk, your favorite TV show… She knows everything and she is always proud about it.

That’s the kind of things that makes you realize that she really cares about you.

********

“Do you really need to go?” you ask in a pouting tone, wrapped around your girlfriend.

Katie needs to go, you know that. She has to go to Ireland for the national break. You stay in London yourself, your ankle being a little sore and Australia only playing friendly, both of your teams decide to let you rest. You’re a little sad not to go have fun with Caitlin, Steph and Kyra, but you will next time.

“Yes, I have to. But I still could take you in my pocket” she smirks.

“I think I’d like that” you smile back.

Katie laughs and you cuddle even more against her, trying to get as much from your girlfriend as possible. It’s only two weeks, but you don’t like when she’s not around. She seems a little less needy than you are, but she never said anything about your behavior with her. Katie being very honest, you know that she would have said something if she didn’t like something you do.

You feel her shiver when you take a big breath in her neck and you smile, letting your finger run on the skin of her abs. But she knows what you’re doing, because several seconds after, she takes your hand in hers.

“We don’t have time for that, my pretty lady.”

“Can’t make it quick?” you tease.

“Not with you.”

She kisses you and you let her, distractedly asking yourself if it’s a compliment or not. But you soon come back to reality, Katie will leave in some minutes now. You’re at her house, you’ve got her cat’s supervision while she’s away. Ella, her sister, has too but she will rejoin her for the game in Ireland in some days.

You will not, because it would be too risky to do it. People would easily understand what’s happening if you go to the game. And with the social media, it would be impossible to hide. You know it. You’re still a little sad, but you don’t say anything to Katie about it.

She seems a little sad when she says goodbye to you at her door. The way she puts your hair behind your ear before kissing you softly say it all. You don’t need Katie to words what she’s feeling because you can feel it too.

“Write me?” you ask when she takes you against her one more time.

“Course. You too, ok?”

You nod, not trusting your voice at this moment. You hide your face on her neck one last time, breathing her sent. But you know you have to let her go; her Uber won’t wait for her forever.

After a last-minute recommendation about Coopurr, she kisses you a last time before running to the car with her suitcase. You can’t help but smile, waving back at her when she does from the back seat.

********

Katie lost her first game against France and in your opinion, it wasn’t really deserved. Maybe you are biased, but Katie would have deserved to score the goal at the 86th minute. She’s still fuming about her teammates fail and you try to distract her while showing her cat.

It’s seems to work, Coopurr’s purring making her smile. Ella left this morning, and you feel a little lonely here. Thanks god, Lia is in London too and you have someone you like to pass time with you. She is dog-sitting one of the dogs of your teammates and you wonder how it would look like when some of them would have children too.

You were actually walking Calvin with Lia, when you receive a message from one of your friends. You don’t really like when someone send you a “Have you seen that?!” with an article. You were not walking fast because of Lia’s leg, so you don’t have to slow to read it. Maybe sitting on a bench would have been a clever idea though.

You are currently reading an article of a girl, explaining how she slept with Katie McCabe. Your girlfriend. You know that Katie had some hookup before things are getting different between you, but the timing isn’t good. Katie and you are together for four months now. And this girl is literally talking about last week, exactly the day when Katie and her teammates went to a bar to decompress from the training. When you said to Katie that you find it strange, she laughs and answered “Meh we are Irish. Beer is in our DNA.” Which made you laugh at the time, but you are far from laughing right now.

“What’s going on?”

You realize that Lia called your name almost two times before you raise your face to look at her. Not being able to talk, you just give her your phone. You watch closely at her face when she reads it, and you see her passing from questioning to shock. She looks at you straight in the eyes when she gives you your phone back.

“Do you think that’s true?”

There is a lump in your throat that keeps you from talking right. You try to swallow it before talking.

“There are a lot of details.”

Lia nods. There are a lot of details. About Katie and her flat in Dublin, the same one where Ella was living before coming to London too.

“Come on, let’s go home. You need to call Katie.”

********

You did not call Katie, but you didn’t answer her messages or her call either. You know it’s stupid and maybe a little immature. But you cannot face it now. The betrayal is too hard to support, and you cried so much that you are not sure that your eyes will be white again one day.

You still take care of Coopurr though, the cat not leaving your side when you are at Katie’s house. You know she can see you coming if she wants, she installed security cameras outside and inside the house. Other than that, you just go to your flat to sleep the most that you can. You do not want to face this, maybe if you keep hiding the pain will fade away.

It doesn’t. You are startled awake two days after, with loud banging against your door. You hesitate to go answering, but you are clearly in fear that the person will break your door if you don’t get up.

So, you do, trying to arrange your hair in a messy bun. You are wearing Katie’s Irish away jumper and a pair of black Nike shorts. You’re pathetic. But Lia seems to be more relieved than judgy about your appearance when she sees you. She has her phone in her hand, but the relieved soon let place to a frown.

“What are you doing?” she asks.

“Sleeping?”

She grunts and close the door behind her when she comes in your flat. Thanks god you cleaned last night, tired to be in a messy place.

“Why aren’t you answering to Katie?”

“I can’t” you whisper, following her in the living room.

Lia turns around to look at you and her face softens when she sees you. She hesitates several seconds, before handing you her phone.

“Well, do it now.”

You look at the screen to realize that she was already calling someone for almost 45 minutes already. It’s Katie. Lia encourages you to take it with another nod of her head. You sigh and take it, letting yourself fall in the couch behind you.

“Hello?” you mumble.

“Bloody hell, where were you?!”

You wince at Katie’s tone, Lia taping your shoulder in an attempt of recomfort before leaving for the kitchen. You appreciate the intimacy she offers you, but you would have preferred to have her with you to be honest.

“Why aren’t you answering to any of my text or call? What happened?”

Katie seems on verge of breaking down and that’s maybe what made you snap. You don’t shout with Katie; you know that it doesn’t make any sense to do it with her. She’s loud, but you were always able to talk about things without shouting.

“I don’t know, you tell me?” you say icily.

“I don’t understand.”

You can easily imagine her with her eyebrows frown. You sigh before rolling your eyes. If she wants proof, you’re going to give some to her.

“I’ll send you something. After that, if you have something more to tell me, call me back.”

You don’t wait for her answer before hanging up. You take your phone, looking for the article your friend sent you. You didn’t answer to him, but right now, it doesn’t matter. You sent the link to Katie, before going to the kitchen to give Lia her phone back.

“Do you want me to stay, or can I leave?” the Swiss captain asks.

“You can go, Wally. Thanks for coming.”

“Anytime. Call me, ok?”

You smile slightly and nod, letting her kiss your cheek before she leaves. You just have closed the door behind her when your phone start ringing. It’s Katie, requiring a FaceTime. You answer and Katie’s face is almost white when you see her.

“This is bullshit. I never did that, I swear.”

You sigh, rubbing your forehead. You are honestly so tired, the amount of sleep you had those past hours are not very good. And sad, of course.

“I don’t know, Katie” you whisper.

“No, it’s the truth! You have to believe me, baby please.”

“How can she know all of these things, Kat?” you say wearily. “She even knows that you have a birthmark on your tummy, or how your kitchen is decorated.”

“Ella always made TikTok in that flat before she comes to London! And for my birthmark, it probably visible on some pictures. You know that I give my jersey to kids sometimes after the game. People take me on picture every time.”

You let several seconds passed, trying to listen to her. The last part is true, you saw thousand pictures of your girlfriend in sport bra on the football fields. For the second part you don’t see her making things like this, particularly with the fact that you just have to go on TikTok to see if it’s the truth or not.

“Come on Babe, why in the world would I ask you out if it’s just for sleeping around soon after?”

“I don’t know.”

You are desperate. You want to believe her, of course you do. You know she has sometimes trouble with talking about her feelings, but you never thought about her cheating on you. She’s one of the most loyal persons you know.

“You know what? I’m taking a plane right now.”

“What?”

Katie is suddenly moving, and the noise of a suitcase that is open is audible from the phone.

“No Katie, you can’t do that. You have training tomorrow and a game in two days against England.”

“I don’t give a damn fuck.”

You almost roll your eyes.

“Katie, stop.”

She listens and look at you, her face dark and her eyebrow frown. She looks determined but she still stopped when you asked her.

“You can’t do that” you repeat.

“Well come to Ireland. I’ll sent you the ticket for the plane.”

“Katie…”

“Stop calling me that!” she shouts.

“Calling you what?” you ask, frowning.

“Katie.”

She says it like it’s a bad world or something and this time you can’t help but roll your eyes at her.

“It’s your name?” you point.

“You stopped calling me that after we start dating. Stop calling me Katie and come to Dublin. Please.”

********

That’s how you find yourself in a plane for Dublin, reserved by Katie who put you in first class. You roll your eyes when you realize it and sent her a picture of you in your seat when you are in the plane. Since your call, Katie almost never stops calling or texting you. You don’t understand how she managed to get the time to go to training, but she does. And the pictures of her on Instagram can say you that it’s the truth.

She warned you that she won’t be able to come to pick you at the airport, but you are surprised to see a man with your name on a paper waiting for you. He smiles at you, informing you that Katie sent him to drive you to her hotel.

He talks to you about Dublin and some places during the journey to the hotel, while you are looking by the window. You never went to Ireland before, only for football. Maybe Katie will show you around if you manage to forget your fight. And you definitively need to change the idea you made in your head that Katie really cheated on you.

You know that some of your friends saw the article too, but no one talked about it to you. Maybe because you were ignoring everyone, true.

When you arrive, you hide behind your hood because you don’t want anyone to recognize you for now. You’re really fearing to find yourself facing Ruesha, for example. Katie told you her room number and your hands are shaking when you knock on the door of her hotel room.

It took her several seconds to respond, but she finally opens the door. She looks tired honestly, but she’s at camp so it’s maybe not surprising. She froze a little when she sees you, like if she doesn’t believe that you will actually come. You’re the one breaking the silence, rather awkwardly to be honest.

“Hi” you whisper, waving your hand.

Thanks god, Katie doesn’t seem to mind. She doesn’t laugh, taking you against her. Hard.

“You’re here” she whispers while holding you.

You nod, finding solace in her embrace. You missed her, obviously. It would have felt better to find her without all this drama though. She lets you go only several minutes after, not only releasing you totally. She looks at you and you look back, both of you not knowing where to start.

“I’m sorry for the article” Katie finally says after some time.

You shrug, not knowing what you could answer to that. She doesn’t ask for it, cheating or not cheating.

“Do you believe me now?”

You know that the answer to the question is important for her. Like you said, Katie’s loyal. And it’s one of the things who are the most important for her. You know it, you know Katie.

“I think I do” you finally say very slowly.

You see that Katie is looking at your face and your eyes with attention, maybe looking for any trace of doubt from your part. You believe her, that doesn’t mean that the article was forgotten. The way you felt when you first read it is still very perennial in you.

“Yeah?” she asks softly.

You nod, smiling very lightly when she strokes your cheek. She gives you the impression that you are made of glass, and you don’t know if she ever been so delicate with you.

“Come sit down.”

She takes you by the hand and you let her drag you in her bed. You sit here, next to her, with your back against the headboard. Katie sits in front of you, playing with her thumb and her nails.

“I’m going to talk, but if you have something to say please feel free to stop me, ok?” Katie asks.

You nod, looking at her. You are curious to know what she might want to tell you. Does she even know that girl? Or did that girl create all this story?

“I know that I’m maybe not the perfect girlfriend and I know that our relationship didn’t really start like it was supposed to. I’ll always had a thing for you, but I was scared, I was an asshole, and it was honestly easier for me to just sleep with you and try to pass to something else. That’s what I tried to do, but it didn’t work. I was still thinking about you, even more than before.”

Katie stops to take a breath and you are still looking at her, not saying a word for now. You don’t know if Katie thought about what to say to you, but for now you understand what she’s saying.

“I never slept with someone else since our first time, I couldn’t even if I tried and that scared the shit out of me. It was so hard to deal with the breakup with Ruesha, not because I was still in love with her, but because it was so shit, you know? I really don’t want to have to deal with that once again.”

You nod slowly, still not talking. This point makes you a little uneasy to be honest. You knew that Katie’s ex will be here to the camp. And you don’t know how the hell are all the people doing, because it was hard for you to be ok with the fact that Ruesha was seeing Katie every day and not you.

“But then there was this damn girl hitting on you right in front of me and I couldn’t support it. I was only thinking that you were mine, but you weren’t. And at that point I didn’t know if you wanted to be mine or if my behavior ruined everything we could have. But you give me a chance, and I’ll be forever grateful for it. That’s why I will never do anything and take the risk to lose you, Y/N. I really care for you and you mean more to me than you think.”

Katie never talked to you about her feelings the way she is doing now. You are touched, of course. You were in love with her before you slept together for the first time, not thinking a second that she might be interested in you too. She seems so vulnerable now, her voice shaking a little at the end. Maybe it’s the emotions, maybe it’s because how much she talked. Maybe both.

You softly take her hand in yours, interlocking your fingers together.

“I really care about you too. That’s why this… things was so hard to read. I don’t understand why someone would invented something like that.”

“I dunno. For celebrity maybe”

Katie shrugs, not really having interest in that for now. All that mattered to her right now is being sure that you trust her. That you believe her and she didn’t lose you.

“Are we good?” she asks, searching for your eyes.

“You promise that nothing happened?”

“I swear on Coopurr’s head, babygirl.”

“Ok” you laugh, rolling your eyes.

You can’t hide the fact that this is the first time that you laugh since you red this article on the park with Lia.

“Hug?”

Katie opens her arms with a slight smile and you don’t hesitate once second before going for her. Your movement make you both fall in the bed and you smile when you hear Katie’s laugh. You missed it. You missed her.

“God I missed you” Katie mumbles from under you, reading in your mind.

“I missed you too” you say honestly, letting your head rest against her shoulder.

She just hums, stroking your back softly while steering at the ceiling. You feel yourself dozen, you haven’t really had a good sleep those last days. But soon there is knock against Katie’s door and you jump.

“McCabe, diner!”

Katie sighs softly and release you to sit on the bed.

“Is it now that I leave?” you asks, not able to hide your disappointment.

“If you want to. Otherwise, you can wait for me here, I’ll sneak something for you to eat and we can sleep together. Tomorrow morning I’ll make my sister come to get you and you can come to the game?”

“Won’t people ask what the hell I am doing here?” you arch an eyebrow.

“That’s not their business. Unless it disturbs you.”

“It doesn’t”

“So it’s settled then” Katie shrugs, getting up from the bed.

She kisses you one more time before leaving and you decide to take the time to shower. You fall asleep while waiting for her, only taking the time to eat the sandwich and snacks she takes with her in the room before falling asleep again. You slept better in her arms than you did since like forever.

And the next day, when Ella came to take you to Katie’s flat at Dublin, you are feeling good again. Katie didn’t cheat on you.

Ireland didn’t win against England, but you are prouder than ever of your girlfriend. You decide to wear Katie’s jersey and to watch the game with her family in the stadium. Your presence didn’t went unnoticed, but like Katie said, you both didn’t care. To be honest, you even have fun to post what fans like to call soft launch.

[fl3shm4id3n]

ʜᴜᴍᴀɴ ᴀᴘᴇ (ᴘᴀʀᴛ ɪ): ᴛʜᴇ ᴀ.ᴘ.ᴇ. ᴇxᴘᴇʀɪᴍᴇɴᴛ

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐚𝐧 𝐞𝐱𝐩𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐞 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐬. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧, 𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐨𝐧𝐞. 𝐄𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐥𝐞𝐟𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐜𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦, 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐧 𝐢𝐧 𝐛𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐀𝐩𝐞𝐬. 𝐖𝐡𝐨 𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐰𝐞𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐬𝐲𝐦𝐩𝐚𝐭𝐡𝐲 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧 '𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝' 𝐡𝐚𝐝. 𝐁𝐮𝐭, 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐚𝐧 𝐢𝐬𝐬𝐮𝐞. 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐬𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐝 𝐛𝐲 '𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐖𝐡𝐢𝐭𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐚𝐭𝐬' 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐪𝐮𝐞 𝐢𝐦𝐦𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐦𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐯𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐢𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐚𝐟𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭 𝐨𝐟 𝐡𝐮𝐦𝐚𝐧𝐢𝐭𝐲, 𝐛𝐮𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐛𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐡𝐞𝐥𝐩 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐜𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐨 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐡𝐮𝐫𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐩𝐚𝐬𝐭?

ᴘᴀɪʀɪɴɢ: ɪᴍᴘʟɪᴇᴅ ʙʟᴜᴇ ᴇʏᴇꜱ x ꜰᴇᴍ! ʜᴜᴍᴀɴ ʜʏʙʀɪᴅ? ᴀᴘᴇ! ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

ꜱᴏɴɢ: ᴋɪᴅ ᴄᴜᴅɪ - ᴍʀ. ʀᴀɴɢᴇʀ

TW: human and ape experimenting, illegal? experimenting, talks of torture, blood, brain swapping, bride of Frankenstein/Poor Things references, talks of death and taking risks, abuse, injuries, talks of war, blood, guns, murder, humans being assholes, Koba, Not edited.

Masterlist

The A.P.E. Experiment, was an experiment done by a private organization who deeply believed that both humans and apes are much closer then they're out to be. Since there was endless and endless of research that both species are technically the same. Except the humans are evolved and the apes aren't, yet they shared the same kind of intelligence.

That's why the A.P.E. Experiment took place. They actually wanted to prove and show how a human and ape can think the same things and be both as intelligent as they are. They've been several and several attempts, but there was always some kind of miscalculation or something going wrong. Not only that, but they test subjects would either die or not make it because of the risky brain transplant done by the scientist.

Despite those many fails, they kept on going. They weren't going to stop until they had finally manage to do what they were meant to do. Even if that involves the deaths of many humans and apes. Not only that, but they also worried about the money that had been founded into the experiment, if they didn't use it, then this whole experiment would have gone to waste. So they kept on going on again, again, and again, until finally after many attempts they had succeded.

You had no name, except for your serial number. Which was '013'. Technically, your name was 'H-Thirteen', but you were called 013. That number was tattooed onto your wrist ever since you could remember. You don't have much of a memory, since your brain had already been switched out not too long ago. The scar at the back of your shaved head was still somewhat healing. The procedure happened when you were 13 years old. The White Coats were nervous, they hoped that this time the transplant would work this time. After many attempts, none had succeeded. But this time. It had worked. Both you and the other Ape had actually survived the transplant. The White Coats were happy to learn this. Finally, after years of planning. It had finally worked.

Ever since you were given your new brain, you began to develop new behavior. Before, you'd talk verbally, now you sign or make ape noises as a form to communicate. When you'd speak vocally, you'd speak as if you were trying to form words. Like a child who just learned how to say words. You used to walk normally, now you walked slightly hunched and with your knuckles for support of some kind. Instead of standing, you'd be scrunched down, using your knuckles for support. Not only that, but you had grown canines. They were small, but they were visible. Besides those changes, your emotions had also change. When you'd be happy you'd jump around and be loud. But when you'd get mad, your snarl and hiss. As well as throw things that were near you. They were 'small' changes, at least to you yet the White Coats made it a huge deal.

The ape who's brain had been switched with yours, also began to experience changes. She now speaks verbally. Very human like, it was almost unbelievable. She walks and stands like a human. Even has human like emotions. Not only that, but the thing about this ape, was that she is your sister. You and her were both made out of the same DNA and grew in the same artificial womb. Also, when standing next to each other, you and her looked alike. A lot alike. Except, she was a ape and you were a human. That alone made it obvious that you both are twins, you and her were one of many human and ape twins. Except, the difference was that you and her survived the brain transplant. You and your twin were the lucky ones. Despite both your huge changes, you were both still different species.

The experiment continued. You and your twin known as A-Thirteen would often complete tasks on a daily basis. They were simply yet hard tasks to do, but you and Thirteen would complete them using your unique skills. The White Coats monitored everything. Took notes and videos of everything, for research and data. Yours and A-Thirteen's brain would often been checked up. Just to see it's development and how it's getting used to your new body. Since in the past, the other test subjects would either reject the brain or the brain would just die or even infect them, killing them. But your brain had got used to your spinal cord and body. It was shown how the brain had quickly got used to your body and the slight changes in your DNA. It had actually become your brain now. But not A-Thirteen, your twin's brain had become infected with some kind of bacteria. They tried to save her, but the infection had already spread out into her body, killing her. The White Coats were disappointed, but they were glad that you had survived. Which was good to them.

When you reached the age of 15. That's when the experimenting got aggressive. Wires would be poked into your scalp to test out your brain and would always make sure to check for any infections or anything abnormal, but it was all good. Not only that, but your body would be put in constant testing. You had no idea why, but you never asked because were made to believe that what they were doing was good. But, did that good have to be so painful?

You began to hate every bit of it. Having to be strapped into a bed, having wires put in your body, constant needles and fluids getting injected into your body. Those are of few tests done, there was more. But you preferred to just for get about them. At least you tried to forget about them. The scars on your body were a constant reminder of what the White Coats did to you. You attempted to rebel, refusing to do your daily tasks and would put up a fight when you'd be dragged into the lab for testing. Due to your rebellion, you'd get punished. Such as be locked in your room for hours without food or water. Same with being tased or get beaten by one of the White Coats. You hated it. All you wanted was for things to go back to the way they were.

At least, that's what you thought. In reality, you wished that you could be normal. Except, you weren't. Sure, you looked just like the White Coats, but your brain was the thing that wasn't normal. Often times you'd be told that you were special and that you'd do great things in the future. Except, you didn't want that. You wanted to do things that weren't going to the lab to be tested or doing tasks that you've already done. You wanted to interact with humans your age and just do stuff they'd do. Have a family, from what you learned, humans either had a big or small family from the books you read. They had a mother, father, a son or daughter. Even both or more. You wanted that, except. You didn't. You had no mother or father, you had a sister. You could never have what the humans had. You were kept in isolation. Never allowed to go outside, ever. The only company you had, was the company of the White Coats and A-Thirteen. But she was gone. You were now alone, with the White Coats.

ʏᴇᴀʀ 2026

You were now a 20 year old full grown woman. Things haven't changed at all. You were still the same person, in the same place with the same people. Nothing has changed, you were still being tested on and you still had tasks to complete. It was the same old routine, after five years. Everything was the same. Nothing has changed. You thought in the span of those years, something would change, but no. Everything was the same, it was getting tiring. Up to the point where you couldn't take it anymore. The routine was boring and nothing new. You hated it.

That evening, you doing your regular puzzle solving. This puzzles would get difficult and more complicated, but you always managed to complete them. Like always, you were monitored by five White Coats. Three taking notes, one recording with a camera and another just observing your every move. You began to hate being watched, you always had eyes on you. At least during the day, at night was the only time you had some sort of privacy. Even though you should be asleep, you stayed up late. To do your own things in your bedroom. Which was more of a cell. It felt like you were in a cage.

Once you were finished solving the puzzle, you were praised by the five scientists. Their praises used to make you happy, but now you could hear how forced and ingenuine they sounded. You hated when you'd hear them go 'good job!' or 'you did so good 013'. They talked to you as if you were still a child. You hated it. Your routine went on. You ate, you did your climbing and swinging exercises, and learned to speak new words.

Later that night, you went to bed. Except you didn't sleep just yet. You were hiding under your bed with a flash light, looking at the many pictures you drew. Of yourself, your sister A-Thirteen with a mother and father. They looked like a child's drawing, but you liked looking at the picture. Day dreaming that you'd actually have this. You often wondered what a mother and father would be liked. How would it be like to be cared for, along with your sister. You missed her, dearly. She was the only one who'd understand you and you'd understand her.

You'd also have pictures of yourself, but with hair. You really wished you could grow out your hair, but the White coats never allowed it since. Since having a buzzcut would make it easier for them to poke needles in your brain. You wanted long hair because you liked how it looked on the female White Coats and to hide the huge scar on the back on your head. And maybe, just know what it's like to have hair. But sadly, you couldn't. They'd never allow it, no matter what reason.

The next morning, you had been woken up earlier than most days. That was odd. As you got dressed into a newly cleaned hospital gown and a pair of white shoes. You were informed that you're going to a different facility. A different facility? That'd mean you'd go outside for the first time. You have seen the outside word, but behind a glass. You were never allowed to go outside until now. Where were you going? Who were you going with? Why were you leaving the facility after twenty years? You had so many questions that you wished they'd be answered. You had said your goodbyes to all the White Coats whom you've been with for all those years. Instead of feeling sad, you felt almost relieved. Glad that you were no longer under there care, which meant, no more experiments and no more of that routine you've grown tired of.

While you were being escorted out of the facility by the men covered in black, you had finally stepped foot outside. The fresh air and the wind felt new to you. Never in a million years have you ever smelled the air of outside and felt the cold wind hitting your skin. As much as you wanted to go and explore the wilderness you've read about, you couldn't. As you walked to vehicle, you couldn't help but look around you, getting a good eye of what you've been missing out. You wanted to feel and smell the dirt, even drink the water from the river, but you couldn't. You were required to move asap. You needed to be in another facility immediately.

The car drive was long and quiet, you were sitting down between two men dressed in black. It felt tense and stiff. It made you feel uncomfortable, but choose to remain as still as possible. You began to think about where you were going would be like. What kind of people you'd meet. Would they be more White Coats? How would those White Coats be like? Will they be other people that weren't White Coats? The questions keep pouring in. For most of the ride you just kept on thinking and thinking of questions that you know would never be asked. No one ever answered your questions.

After a while, the vehicle had stopped. In some part of the woods, it stopped so that you and the men in black could take a break. For fifteen minutes. You were allowed out. You were glad that they were nice enough to let you get some fresh air. As much as you wanted to explore the woods, you couldn't. You were only allowed to go a few feet away from the vehicle and had to come back after the fifteen minutes.

You walked around a bit, getting a view of the tall trees. They were much bigger then you thought. You couldn't help but feel how rough and hard the wood felt. It almost made you feel as if you wanted to climb it. Your attention then switched to the wet dirt, it must have rained the night before. It smelt nice, very comforting in a way that you never thought would bring you comfort. You reached down and took a small clump of it, feeling how soft and wet it was. It was nice, very nice to smell and touch. You wanted to see more.

So, you walked much further than you should've. Looking around more trees and even more dirt. But you also got the look of some plants and bugs you've read about in some books about them. Everything was new to you. You've always dreamed about going outside, just to see how it would look like. Now it was true, even if it only took you fifteen minutes, you wanted to enjoy every part of it. Since who knows how long it'll be if you ever go outside. You were loving the moment.

Then, you spotted a flower. It was a very pretty small and the color blue. They were called 'Forget-Me-Not', you've always wanted to see them in person, instead in book pages. You wanted to take some and maybe even keep wherever you were sent to. You got on your knees and plucked a huge amount of them. Once in your hand, you looked at them closely. Studying the color, shape and smell. You couldn't help but smile, when you looked at the small plants in your hands. You've fallen in love with them already. You were to focused on looking at the flowers that you didn't hear the men in black calling out to you. Finally, after snapping out of your thoughts, you heard them call you. As much as you didn't want to go, you had to.

You didn't notice that you were standing right near a hill, when you got up, your foot must have made a wrong move. That you ended up falling down the hill. You squealed and groaned as you rolled down the hill. After a few seconds, you had fallen into a river. The harsh water of the waterfall had dragged you down the riverbank, you got hit with rocks and branches in the water. You tried finding a way out, but the water just kept dragging you with it. Until you had finally spotted a branch and held onto it with all your strength. Despite being in pain, you managed to hold onto the branch. You were glad that you were okay. But the problem was, where did the river take you?

You managed to get out of the water and back on the ground. You were drenched. Your shoes and hospital gown were wet. You quickly felt cold. Your whole body began to shiver, so as a way to warm yourself up, you hugged your body. Your teeth were chattering against one another's and the wild got colder. You didn't want to stay there, you had to move. Maybe you could find the lab again, but you had no idea where to search. You've never been outside, so you wouldn't know where to start.

So, you just walked wherever you thought would help you, but no. You had no idea what to do or where to look. You were getting confused and unsure of what to do. Should you keep on walking or just stay where you were and hoped that they'd come find you. It was getting overwhelming. As you walked, you couldn't help but begin to breath a bit rapidly. You were about to go into a panic. You began to bite your finger nails, while your free hand was clenching onto the short sleeve on your hospital gown. It didn't help that you were cold because of your wet shoes and gown.

Suddenly, you tripped. Must have been cause you were walking fast and didn't see where you were going. Turning on your back, you looked down at your wet and dirt covered shoes. They were getting uncomfortable now. So you reached over and took them off your feet. Then threw them in a form of frustration. Not only where you lost, but you were cold and now barefoot. You let out a small frustrating snarl. That was something you'd do when you'd get mad. Afterwards, you got up from the ground, dusting off the dirt off your arms and legs. Your wet gown was now even more dirty. God, you hated what was happening now.

Then, you heard noises. Turning to see where they were coming from, you saw nothing. But you did notice some bushes moving as soon as you set your eyes on them. That made your stomach turn. Was something out there? Without a moment more, you began to walk again, but this time a bit faster. You could still hear bushes and leaves making noises, due to something hitting them. You grew into a panic, so you began to run, with the help of your knuckles. Hoping that you'd you'd go much faster. But again, you didn't see where you were going, and tripped again. This time you fell on your side, hitting your cheek onto the dirt, causing it to scrape. It hurt, a lot.

As you tried getting up, you heard bushes shaking and leaving hitting each other. You got up and looked around, trying to find the source of the noises. But you couldn't see them, except just hear them. You began to panic even more. What was it? An animal of some kind? If it was, what kind of animal? After a few moments, you spotted a pair of eyes. Blue eyes, to be exact. They were looking right back at you. That was odd, you couldn't tell if they were eyes of a human or an animal. They looked human, but they didn't feel human.

Slowly, they moved. Which made you back up a bit, now scared of what will come out. Carefully and slowly, they had finally stepped out of their hiding spot. It was, an ape. You've never seen another ape before. You were amazed by how he looked. As much as you wanted to get close, you kept your distance. You and the ape just stared at one another, almost as if you both wanted to figure out what you both were. After that small moment of silence, more apes began to pop out of their hiding spot. That made you panic a bit.

Looking around, you saw that they were a few more apes in all your directions. You had no place to attempt to run. Then, they began to approached you slowly. You grew scared, you had no idea what kind of intension they had or what they'd do. You back up, trying to find a way to run, but they was no place to run to. You began to fall into distress. You had backed up into a tree, you no had nowhere to go. As the apes approached you even more. You gone into panic mode. You began to scream and shout at them. Your screams of both fear and panic had caused them to stop in there tracks. They simply watched as you continued to scream in a panic.

What had caught their attention, was how your screams sounded very similar to theirs. They were very similar to an ape's scream. Eventually you stomped screaming, you crouched down and covered your head with both arms, breathing heavily and trying to catch your breath. As if you just wanted to disappear from that place. It grew quiet, all that was heard was your whimpers and heavy breathing. After some time, you heard someone approaching you, but you did not move from your position. You stayed where you were and didn't plan on moving at all. That was something you'd do when the White Coats would either beat you with a rod or tase you when you'd go ballistic.

You felt how a hand softly patted your shoulder. You still didn't move, until you felt the same soft pat on the shoulder. Slowly, you look ever the shoulder where you have been patted on. It was another ape, except. He looked much older than the one with blue eyes. You could see the bit of grey hairs around his chin and cheeks. His eyes were hazel like color, but they were more green. They too looked human, except they weren't. Just like the first ape you saw, you both locked eyes, staring at each other for a moment. You began to slowly calm down, for some reason you felt slightly better. Less panic and a bit more relaxed.

You then noticed how he reached his hand out to you. At first, you weren't so sure, whether you should take it or not. But after a bit of thinking, you took a hold of his hand. He then helped you get up from the floor. The ape was almost exactly your size. You weren't neither short or big, you were right in between. He seemed to also be right in between, but seemed slightly bigger than you. "You are safe." He said in a raspy but firm voice. You were still a bit shaken up by everything, but you were calm and collected. He continued to hold his hand, as a kind of comfort and to keep you calm. He then turned to the other apes, signing them that everything was alright and to stay put.

He looked back at you, seen that you were much calmer and relaxed. "Come." He said to you, lowly and comfortingly. You only nodded your head in response. After that was settled, he continued to hold your hand and processed to get you to follow him. So you did, you followed right behind him. Holding his rough hand. Then the rest of the other apes processed to follow behind you both. He must have been there leader of some kind. They listened to him when he singed them to stay put. But, your question was, where were you going? Where was he taking you? It didn't really matter to you at the moment. You just wanted to get out of that dreadful situation you were in just now. Hopefully where you were taken to, wasn't another lab of some kind.

ɴᴇxᴛ ᴘᴀʀᴛ

[the-witch-of-one-piece]

Secrets Kept From Him 18+ Chapter 6: Keep It To Yourself Ran x F!reader x Draken WC:6.9k Resident: @enchantedforest-network Synopsis: The aftermath of Draken confessing his true feelings to you, leads to you both being in your bed. Ran appearing late with a surprise you d/n and you the following day. The surprise would end in a tense discussion and bringing out a side of Ran you had never seen before. Draken facing his own challenges regarding his ex-wife. Ms. Yamaguchi doing her own little research into Ran's life. Ran and Rindou preparing for a risky move with a powerful family that ended on bad terms years back. Tw: drinking, smoking, oral sex, vaginal penetration, masturbation, pet names (good girl), reverse cowgirls position, creampie, orgasm, clit stimulation, making out, possessive behavior, suggestive theme, argument, divorce Draken, mention of death, weapons, criminal affairs, bribery, (unedited) MINORS DNI

You looked at Draken. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt.. right? He is single and I’m single and what we did last night. You could honestly tell he was serious about the question he asked you just moments ago. He wanted a fair shot to show you how he cared for you. giving him a soft nod you agreed to the date “I will go on a date with you Draken.” 

You could see Draken's shoulders relax a bit, the small smile on his lips.  The more you both looked at each other your lips gravitated towards one another. Something about his kisses was intoxicating; it drew you more with each passing second.

Your arms draped around his neck, and he pulled you closer to him. The soft moans escaped from your lips His hand reaching for your back side as he gave it a squeeze. He was tempted to place you on the counter and give you another taste of last night. The intimacy was something you definitely missed. Getting lost in this moment it was becoming hard to control the urge to be fucked right there and now.

The moment you heard footsteps upstairs you both separated not before he stole a quick kiss. You tried to compose yourself quickly. Your D/n greeted you both “Good morning Mommy and Kenny.” 

“Good morning sweetie.” You smiled

“Morning kiddo.”

“Kenny you're here early,” she wasn’t used to seeing him this early.

You looked over at Draken waiting for him to respond. “I want to have breakfast with you both, sooo I came over. ” 

You walked to your room and grabbed your phone. You hadn’t looked at your phone since you put d/n to bed. You had a voicemail from Ran. You finally managed to listen to the voicemail.  Sitting on the edge of the bed you could hear the bothersome tone in his voice. He seemed to really mean his words as he left the voicemail...A deep sigh came from your lips. Coming from downstairs you could hear d/n laughing. Going downstairs once again you began to prepare breakfast with Draken helping you out.

~~~~~~~~~~

Ran was on his way home, he hadn’t heard from you. He was contemplating calling you again but knowing you may not answer again. Rin was going through his email on his phone. An email that he didn’t expect to receive at all, after a bad business deal a few years back “Interesting… The Nishimura family  wants to set up a meeting.” 

The Nishimura family was known for the connections of illegal weapons along with connections to the black market. The Haitani brothers were one of their transporters. Even running them in the club preparing them for the black market auctions. When they weren’t getting their fair cut of profits, it became a conflict. The bitterness of back and forth for the past few years, even them keeping a hidden stash of weapons from a truck that went missing. It became suspicious of the sudden meeting, when deals go south with the Nishimura the people would end up dead. It was odd that I wanted this meeting.

Ran wasn’t convinced that it was a business they wanted to talk about. But he was rather curious about what they wanted. “No meeting in person. Set it up online….I get the feeling that it's just more than wanting to make a deal.” Ran responded with his eyes on the road. 

“I was thinking the same thing.” He responded. “Still are you going to be alright with doing this if they mean business.” 

“Of course if they don’t fuck us over like the last time…by all means.I bet they were having issues with there other transporters.” Ran responded.

“That’s not what I’m asking…What if they find out about ______ and D/n. You didn’t have to worry about it back then now that they are both here.” He didn't answer right away “If it comes to that point where they threaten them… I will for sure put a bullet in each head.” Rin responded to the email and now just waiting for them to respond.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“I will pick you up tomorrow around 7.” Draken was getting ready to leave. 

“Yeah that sounds great.” You responded with a small smile walking him to the door. “D/n come say bye,” you called out. 

D/n came over to the front door, Draken kneeled down. “Bye Kenny! Thank you for yesterday.” 

He gave her a hug “anytime. We can do something else soon, okay?” He rubbed the top of her hair. “Be good for your mom okay?”  she nodded as she ran back to the living room.  

Draken looked at you, his finger going under your chin. Both of you leaned for your lips touching. “I will see you tomorrow.” 

“See you tomorrow.” you smiled.

As soon as he left, you decided to get dressed. Checking in on d/n before you went upstairs. Getting undressed, as you were walking to your dresser you noticed the marks on your chest they turned purple. You remembered Draken's words from last night lingered in your thoughts. You couldn’t get over the way he touched your body. Snapping out of your thoughts you need something to cover your chest. Grabbing a crew neck fitted shirt that covered the indecent marks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Draken was pulling up to his home when he saw a familiar car parked in his driveway already. Letting out a sigh. He was already dreading the encounter with his ex-wife.  Parking his car he proceeded into his home. Opening the door he saw Emma sitting at the dining room table. She instantly turned her gaze towards her ex-husband. “Emma, what are you doing here?” he asked.  

“I’ve been trying to get a hold of you. Do you not know how to answer your phone?” Emma looked over at her ex husband. 

“We haven’t spoken since the divorce you expect me to answer right away? I was busy.” he crossed his arms across his chest wondering how she got in. “How did you even get in here?” “I had a spare key, remember I used to live here?” she answered. “So where were you?” 

Raising his brow “Don’t worry about it… You don’t need to know where I’m going anymore.”

She rolled her eyes, shaking her head. “You were with ________ weren’t you..”  Draken stood quietly “I heard she was back in town... she even came by the shop and then you left with her...”

“And if I was? Is that a problem of yours?” Draken was becoming bothered. “It's really none of your business what I do.” he sighed  

She was hurt by his response. “So now that she isn't with Ran anymore you're trying to date her now or what?” 

“Emma, you need to leave.” He wasn't going to answer the question. “I need the key.” 

“Just answer the questions, Draken. It’s obvious you still have something for her…Even when we were together, I never really had your full love or we wouldn’t be divorced now…” 

“We are divorced because we couldn’t see eye to eye on stuff even the littlest things would blow up into an argument... I don't wanna argue anymore Emma.” Draken now seeing why she came over. He knew it was bound to happen sooner or later. Even when they were all younger he saw how Emma would act around you. Even if you were blinded by her action at this time it was clear to some of the mutual friends. 

When you first disappeared Emma witnessed the altercation with Draken and Ran. She could see once he found out you were gone he was trying to avoid his feelings about it. Shortly after getting engaged to Emma, they were married. It was great the first year then it started to take a turn. The disagreements would escalate and Draken would spend more time at the shop to avoid going home. 

“Of course, you're done…. Some things never change… I hope you enjoy playing daddy to her daughter.” Draken ignored the comment. Emma goes into her bag pulls the key out placing it on the table. “You know if that is Ran’s daughter he is not going to enjoy you trying to take his role...If you're doing it to please her…. I don’t know what to say but good luck.” 

She walked to the front door. He heard her car start and take off. The home was quiet as he walked to his couch laying down. Draken knew the issues that would arise if he were to start going out with you. In the end, all that mattered was him making you and d/n happy, that's all that mattered to him. Just because you had a baby with Ran didn’t mean he wasn’t gonna treat your daughter any differently. He took it as a sign things were going downhill with his marriage with Emma and now you're here. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I could have come another day…” Rin sighed trying to balance all the items in his hands. “Why the hell am I carrying the most?”

“I think it would be nice for you to see your niece since we missed her birthday yesterday…” Ran fixing his shirt “ I’m gonna knock on the door, hands can't be full.” The comment Ran spoke made Rin roll his eyes.

They were both walking up to your home. He needed to make it up to d/n and to you. You didn’t return his call. He decided to show up but not empty-handed. Ran rang the doorbell waiting to see you answer. Opening the door you saw both Haitani brothers on your front porch. “Hey beautiful” Rin looked over at his Ran smiled at you then at your serious expression. Just your stare alone at Ran. ‘I know that look,’ he thought to himself. “Hey ______ can you let us in this stuff is heavy.” 

Opening the door for them as they both enter the home. Rin made his way towards the living room. While Ran stood in front of you, he placed the items in his hand on the side table. “______ can we talk.” You didn’t want to hear anything about what you heard on the phone.“Ran… go see d/n… I don’t wanna discuss it.” you placed your hand on your hips. You were avoiding eye contact with him. “Please go see her.” 

He let out a low sigh, picking up the items on the table he walked towards the living room. The moment he saw d/n a smile appeared on his face. “Happy belated birthday princess.” He caught her attention. Bringing the rest of the presents to where Rin placed them. He scooped her up in his arms giving her a big hug. She hugged him back tightly. Still holding her “I’m sorry I missed your birthday.”

“It’s okay!” She looked at all the presents. “Are all those for me?” she asked. “Of course.” he went all out for his little one. Rin had to calm his brother down at the store because he would have bought everything there. Walking to the living room you saw him holding her  “But there is one for your mommy.” he spoke as he looked at you. 

“Ran.” you looked at him. The gift comes from guilt and a form of apology. He knew you wouldn’t refuse it as your daughter was in the same room even if you were mad at him.

He placed down the d/n and grabbed the large box. ”This is for you.” 

“Mommy opened it!” she excitedly said. 

Feeling pressure to do so you removed the lavender ribbon from the white box. Removing the top of the lid. You saw the neatly black dress. Pulling it out of the box, it was a beautiful dress. “Oh my...” 

“D/n do you think it is okay if I could take your mom to dinner so we could talk later on? Rin wants to hang out with you.” He looked over at your d/n ‘Dammit Ran.’ you squinted at him. Rin was just as surprised as you were, his brother didn’t talk about this to him at all. Just threw him in the mix. Another reason why he brought Rin along with him. You would have turned him down if you didn’t have a babysitter. “Oh yeah! Mommy you're gonna look so pretty!” d/n smiled You placed the dress back in the box. You notice the cut of the dress was deep in the front. “Shit….” you were going to have to try and cover up the dark hickeys on your breast. 

Ran returned his attention d/n “Alright let's open up your presents.” A few hours would pass, and you started to get ready. Trying to cover love marks was going to be a challenge. Ran being infamous for leaving his mark on you whenever you had to attend something you would have to cover it up. Adding the color corrector to the marks you began trying to conceal with your foundation to match your skin tone.  

 Ran and Rin were  with D/n as she was playing with the new items she gotten. Ran noticed a new stuffed animal addition that was on the couch. As he reached for it “D/n I’ve seen this one before.” “Kenny won it for me!” she smiled

Ran looked at the stuffed animal “He did now? Was it from yesterday?” “Yeah me, mommy and Kenny went to the Carnival yesterday.” Ran wouldn’t express it right now but it would be a bit bothersome hearing about Draken taking d/n and you to the carnival yesterday. Wondering if this was going to cause any problems with him trying to rebuild his life with you. ‘Isn’t he married?’  Ran thought to himself. He never paid attention to his love life. Because you were already Rans nothing else matters.  He was curious if anything else happened while at the carnival. “I’m glad you had fun.” He put a smile on.  He was going to end up asking you later on tonight. “Hey princess, why don’t you check on your mommy and see if she is finished getting ready.” 

D/n nodded and Ran to the stairs to check on you.  “Isn’t Draken married?” He looked over at Rin.

“He and what’s her name got divorced a few months back, that's what I heard from Izana.” Rindou responded. “You think he is going to try and make a move?” 

“I wouldn’t doubt it. If he knows ______ and I are not  together I wouldn’t put it past him…I will see what's going on for sure.”  Ran said with the thought of Draken even touching you was boiling him on the inside. 

The moment they both heard the sounds of heels, caught both of the Haitani brothers' attention. It’s been a moment you fully were put together having your hair and make up done. Anything he was thinking disappeared at that moment. He stood up still, eyes on you. “Mommy looks so pretty!” 

“Thank you sweetheart.” You smiled at you. 

“She does.” Ran looked at you up and down. “We should head out for the chat.”

“Right…” you said. Bending down slightly, you held onto your daughter's hands “mommy will be back soon okay?” 

“Okay mommy.” D/n smiled

“Rin, are you sure you can watch her?” You asked. Other than school and the one time your aunt watched her you hadn’t been apart from her let alone anyone watching her… 

“Yeah it’s fine…” Rin said. “I will get an understanding on why she likes watching  weird things on tv…”  looking at the program she was watching.

Ran and you got into his car and began driving to the destination. It was a quiet part of the ride when he stopped at a red light. “You still take my breath away.”

“Ran flattery is not going to work this time.” You looked at him and then out the window. He was up to something you weren’t sure what it was. Your patience for him was not this short before.

“I’m just stating a fact.” he knew you were still bothered by him missing her birthday. He felt your demeanor change a bit from normal. The charming flatters seem to go over your head. The more serious look on your face planted there.

He was hoping the place he was taking you to would ease some of the anger towards him. A place where it held special memories for you both. Following him to the familiar restaurant. You looked around ‘it still looks the same.’  A place where you celebrate your anniversary every year. Taking a seat Ran began or the same wine you always had. 

You felt your phone vibrate in your lap. Looking down you saw it was a notification from Draken, confirming if your aunt was gonna care for d/n while you both went out tomorrow. Trying to keep a poker face as much as possible.  Ran saw your eyes looking down as he asked. “Who texted you?” He asked, wondering if it was Draken.

 “It’s nothing.” You responded back before locking your phone .

“That little friend of yours I presume.” Ran spoke and didn't want to beat the bush around it. “D/n told me the three of you went to the carnival yesterday for her birthday.” 

“We did. Our plans originally got canceled, remember .”  Adjusting your posture. 

“It’s interesting she picked up the nickname Kenny for him too… how often does he come over?”

You could see where this was going by his comments. “She calls him Kenny because he didn’t like Mr. Ken, so he told her to call him Kenny .” 

“Answer the question how often is he coming over?” 

“Why do you want to know?” Asking him 

“Dammit ________, answer the question. It’s rather annoying I have to repeat myself a third time.,” he spoke in a low discreet tone. 

“He comes over every now and then. Are you happy?” You narrowed your eyes at him. “I honestly shouldn’t be answering that. Whoever I allow in my house is not a concern to you. I mean have I questioned you about who you bring to your home?” “I want to make sure and see who you're bringing around my daughter.”

“Wow okay.” You spoke in a low sardonic tone reaching for the glass of wine “I think I’m a good judge of character,” 

“Sure you are.” 

“Your sounding pretty jealous right now,”

“Well when someone tries to interfere with things I’m working on it becomes a problem to me” 

“Oh really now?” Placing the glass of wine down   “Ran darling.. don’t keep me waiting too long…want to explain that?”  Mimicking the voice of the woman you heard on the phone. “Was that a problem that needed to be handled, Ran darling?” 

He let out an annoyed sigh “it was a business meeting I had to attend too..” After that call the amount of anger he had built inside of him. Staining one of  his most expensive suits. After that phone call with you.

“Right right business meeting you tend to mix it with pleasure.” 

“You don’t know what happened, it was  just business nothing more…” 

“You're right I don’t know but hearing another woman on the other side paints a different picture.” you crossed your legs along with your arm “Whether it was business or not, you could have put it off if you wanted to. You told me how important her birthday was to you and wanted to be there to spend it with us.”

“It was important to me… you don’t understand ________ ,but Draken was there to save the day.”  he responded. “Always seemingly there.” you ignored the comment he made about him. “Did anything else happen?” 

You weren’t going to mention you and Draken sleeping together, even the confession, or the date that was tomorrow it would send Ran into this unpleasant mood along with actions he may do.  “Other than enjoying d/n birthday” you wanted this conversation to be over with. You found yourself frustrated as the conversation continued on. “Ran, I don’t wanna discuss this anymore, it's done and over with. At the end of the day, our main priority is d/n. Not the issues between you and me…Whoever you see is your business, not mine because we are not together.”

He let out a sarcastic low chuckle and he slightly shook his head. “I’m assuming you think that will apply to me as well…________  even if we are not together right now, we have a daughter. I'd be damned if I hear my daughter call someone else dad or see you with someone else.”  His tone was more possessive than his normal calmer tone. He felt like Draken would try something with you. How his gut feeling would be spot on. Unknowingly the boundaries were more different between you and Draken. “I would love to see someone try and steal you away.” Ran locked eyes with you. 

It was evident it was becoming much more than you can handle. Scooting your chair back “I’m done.. I… I can’t do this with you right now…”  Leaving the table as you made your way towards the front of the restaurant.

‘Son of a bitch...’ He thought to himself, flexing his jaw, the conversation did go overboard. Out of jealousy, he felt he could have made things worse between you both.  Getting up from his chair he followed you. “_______..” he called out to you but you didn't turn around as you made your way to the entrance. He grabbed your hand. “Ran let go”

“Look, things got a bit carried away….” the low sigh coming from him. “I’m sorry I don’t wanna fight with you, it wasn't the intention I had for tonight.” As Ran was trying to smooth things over with you. Rin caved into his niece, the counter had every condiment for a sundae out. Bags opened, jar lids opened, ice cream cartons open. He swirled the can whipped cream on the pile of ice cream. Just looking at it was giving him a toothache. When he placed the can down “is this enough?” he asked

“More please.” she pointed to a can of whip cream. “Okay then tell me when to stop okay?” He shook the can.

He proceeded to add more. It was a while before she “stop!” The majority of the ice cream was covered in whip cream.  He brought it to the dining room table. She ran to the kitchen drawer pulling two spoons out. “Here!” she handed him one. 

“Thanks.” taking a seat he watched her dig into the ice cream.  

D/n began to remember some of the small stories Ran would tell her about him and you dating.  “Mr. Rin, Mr. Ran said he knows my dad. Have you met him?” she asked. 

He had the spoon in his mouth a bit thrown off in the question. “Oh uhhh yeah I know him.”

“You do?!” “Yeah he is a pain in the ass but I know him…” 

“He is?!” her eyes widened. “Does he have a lot of pain in his butt?” she blinked in her eyes assuming her father suffered from butt pain. 

‘Shit’ he said to himself  “no not really it's just a saying…I should say your dad doesn’t like to listen to anyone. Once his mind is made up he sticks to it until he reaches his goal.”

“Oh…Did he stop when he met mommy?”

“When he met your mom it was unexpected.” he began to think back to the day both her parents met “They met at a party, your mom is known to not pay attention when walking and would bump into people. That night she bumped into your dad, and your dad ironically didn’t want to go to the party but I dragged him there. They spent the entire time at the party talking.  When it was time to go, he drove her home and eventually asked her out on a date. He told me a few years back it was the best thing that happened to him.” Rindou leaned against the table with his arms folded. “One thing about your dad, when he met your mom I never saw him truly care for anyone else the way he did with her.” He could see the smile on her face. She had a smile that resembled a Haitani. ‘You definitely are your father's daughter, that's for sure the same smile as his.’

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After agreeing to sit back down with him, the dinner was mainly quiet. Knowing tonight was just a mess for you both. Emotions were running a bit high on both ends of the table. You put your phone on silent not wanting to pick it up to have to question you more. Ran began to think about how to fix this because a part of him never wanted to show you how possessive he could be. 

Getting to your home both of you entered your home. It was quiet and the living room tv was still on but no Rin or D/n. Walking up the stairs you find Rin on the floor using some of her stuffed animals as pillows. D/n was fast asleep. “She wore him out…” you quietly said. 

“That’s my girl,” he smirked. Ran walked to the other side of her bed picking up the white stuffed rabbit that fell on the floor. He placed it next to her, covering her a bit more, kissing her forehead “Sweet dreams princess.”  He walked over to the other side of the bed, slightly kicking his brother's foot, walking him up.

Both Ran and Rin walk down the stairs to the exit. “Rin thanks for watching her”

“It's fine even if it was without my consent… But she is a good kid” Rin spoke, when he noticed there was some tension between you both. “I'm gonna wait in the car.”

Both you and Ran stood there in silence. The silence was finally broken from Ran. “I’m sorry for tonight again ____.” 

“It’s fine…” you didn’t want to leave on a bad note with him. It would just make things awkward when he comes over “Thank you for tonight I forgot how beautiful it was to be in there.” 

“I’m glad you enjoyed it to a certain extent.” “Message me tomorrow and we will set up another day for you to come over.”

He nodded that maybe a day or two apart would be the best for you both. “Of course… get some rest.” 

“You too..”  giving him a half smile.

Ran had his back towards you before he took a step, he turned back around facing you. “I almost forgot something.”

“What?” raising your brow at him. With three fingers slightly grasping your chin he brought you slightly forward. In a quick motion you felt his lips press against yours. The sudden connection of your lips connecting to one another felt like time stopped for a moment. The brief kiss only lasted a few seconds. Ran pulling back seeing the hues of pink on your cheeks he slightly smirked, “Sweet dreams to you are beautiful.” 

Closing the door quickly your back pressed against the door. Your heart was fluttering. It was like kissing him for the first time all over again. Taking off your heels you walked to turn off the tv when you noticed your kitchen light on. You realize the mess in the kitchen.

Ran walking to the car, a small grin on his lips as he hopped into the car. Rin was on his phone “We got a response.” Starting the car as he began to back up “What do they wanna do?” “Meeting online tomorrow…” 

He nodded, “we will see what happens.” still on his mind was the kiss just moments ago.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The following day,  you were at your aunt's house still thinking about the recent events with Draken and now Ran. You made your head spin slightly, you felt happy yet nervous going out with Draken today but also guilty because you were thinking about Ran. “You know if you keep making that worried face you will start aging quicker than you need.” your aunt took a seat next to you.

“Hmmm? Oh right…” it was hard not to think about it. “You think it's a good idea for me to go out with Draken?” you asked her.

“_____ that is not my call to tell you if it’s a good idea or not. If you have any doubt then you shouldn't. If not then you should.” she knew Draken since you both were younger. “Draken from what I remember he was a good kid even with the whole tattoo on the side of his head at his age. I myself don’t see any issue with going on the date.” You nodded “No harm in trying...Maybe I should try... I mean maybe I’m nervous I haven’t been on a date in years…” This felt like a whole new thing to you dating as a single mom. It makes it more interesting when you're going out on a date with an old friend that you were being fucked by a few days ago. Then you started to think about the discussion with Ran last night that made you feel like he would do something to Draken if he found out about the date. “It could be. Look I’m not too familiar with d/n father now but I know Draken. For him to take d/n out and you for her birthday was something he didn’t have to do but he chose to. If d/n likes him then I say enjoy the date.” Giving a relieved smile. d/n did enjoy hanging out with Ken too. “What time did you want me to pick up d/n?” “Let her stay the night with me, it would be like watching you all over again as a little girl.” your aunt smiled. “Enjoy your life while you are still young to do so. You never know, what if Draken was meant to be with you. You will never know unless you try.” 

Your aunt's words encouraged you throughout the day as you began to get ready for the date. Your car was being serviced at the garage earlier today and it wouldn’t be ready till tomorrow. With the doorbell ringing you felt your heart racing like you just ran a mile. Opening the door Draken was stunned by your look. Both of you getting one another he helped you into the car opening the door and closing it. During the car drive, he felt his hand rest on your inner thigh, his thumb swiping your thigh. The date consisted of places you both enjoyed growing up from your favorite place to eat to going to the beach. It was hitting you both with so much nostalgia as you both reminisced about the good old days. You found yourself holding onto his arm. It was becoming late as you agreed to go back to his home for a drink. ~~~~~~~~~~

Mrs. Yamaguchi was doing her own little digging into Ran’s personal life even having some connections in the past. With the right amount of money, someone's lips (kokonoi) would spill your full name to her.“ Excuse me, Miss. Yamaguchi, we got the information on the woman you inquired about.” 

“Thank you.” She received the paperwork from her assistant. As she was flipping through the paperwork her eyes widened. “What?!?!?” seeing a copy of a birth certificate. “A child?”  but remembered she heard the child's name before when he was on the phone. Things were starting to come to light pieces were clicking together.  “Interesting now, well it's starting to make sense.” Ms. Yamaguchi looked down at the photo of you and d/n. She began to compare herself to you, seemingly trying to find every flaw in the photo. She questioned what Ran saw in you? If she couldn’t see it then what did he actually see?  “We can confirm it's his actual daughter. It looks like they just moved here a few weeks ago… She may look like him but Ran does have a brother now they both look similar as well...” “We are just going off the birth certificate.” her assistant responded “I see… Well, she will know who I am very soon.” She smirked.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Entering his home he flicked the lights on. This was the first time you were in his home. your heart was beating so rapidly.  “You don’t have to stand by the doorway, come on in.” he was walking to the kitchen. You walked into his home more seeing his decor. It did change slightly from the last time you saw his room in the brothel where he used to live. You saw a photo of him and Mikey on the wall from when they were younger. ‘How young they were..’ you smiled 

Draken appeared from the kitchen in his hands were two beers walking towards you. “Here.” 

“Oh, thanks. I was just looking and seeing how young you and Mikey were in this photo. How is Mikey doing?” handing a beer to you. 

“He is okay, living his life. He is at the shop every other day.” 

You nodded “Even after the divorce with Emma you both are friends?” asking him

“We are, I think he knew when things weren't working out but he didn’t say anything. Mikey caught onto a lot of things.”

Both of you sat down on the couch. You leaned on his shoulder “Hey Ken…”

“Yea?” he asked. 

“You know we hung out everyday even had moments of being alone together when we were younger. Why didn’t you tell me?” asking him. 

“It wasn’t that easy ya know.  After being friends for so long, I didn’t want to mess anything up between us back then. I was close a few times…. If I could be perfectly honest with you this time?.”  

“Sure.” tilting your head up and looking at him. “I didn’t expect you to date Ran for so long. I knew Ran's reputation with the women back then and I did worry about what it might do to you if he broke your heart. I would be there to pick up the pieces. Time kept going till that day you just disappeared…”  Draken stood quiet for a moment.

“I remember hearing the stories about the girls he was with… It wasn’t always easy to digest some of the things I heard or mentioned I was just a number like the rest…He would tell me to ignore them but it was hard not to listen to them and their experiences with him. Even when he wasn’t around, in the beginning, I was referred to as his new little toy... I honestly was waiting for him to tell me early in the relationship it wasn’t working out…” you looked down at your beer. “Since we were being honest with one another back then when Emma told me she was in love with you I kinda stepped aside maybe because it was Mikey’s little sister and I didn’t want issues to happen since you and Mikey were close… the feelings were mutual back then not just one side… I just thought whenever Emma was around you seemed happier. You just saw me as a friend or like a sister. I thought she really made you happy.” 

“Funny how life works doesn’t it? Just being with you makes my day.”

You chuckled at his comment, leaning off his shoulder you gave him a light push on his arm. He reached for your hand before you could return it back to you. He brought you closer to him and he placed his beer down. In the instant when we locked eyes, you could see the mischievous look in his eyes. His hand traveling to your hip pulling you closer he began to lean back bringing you on top of him. 

“Do you have to pick up d/n soon?” he asked in a hushed tone. 

“My aunt wanted to keep her tonight. She said, " I have to learn to socialize with other adults better, that’s what she told me...” 

“So you're available then?” flashing a small grin on his lips. “A whole night to yourself? I wonder what you will do?” the slight taunting as his hand slides  underneath the back of your shirt slightly. 

Softly chuckling as you leaned in, pressing your lips against his lightly “I think we can figure something.”

Letting out a content sigh. It would be evident you would be staying the night at his home. It started to get hot and heavy. The clothing trail that leads to the bedroom. Draken sitting on the edge of the bed. His cock was already stiff, he was trying to hold his composure in but having your lips wrapped around his cock drove him wild. “Hnnghnngg~.. Fuckk~.. Ahhhh~" Behind your long thick lashes you look up at him. “You're sucking me off so good.” grunting as he continued to watch you. No one ever sucked his cock this good before, his mind becoming hazy. He never knew hunger until he got a taste of you the first time.  “_________.” You slowed down your lips still around his cock. “I’m not gonna last much longer the way you keep sucking me off.” As your lips unwrapped around his cock “Lay back Ken.” He didn’t argue laying on the middle of the bed, his hand reaching for his cock stroking it until you straddled on top of him. You were in the reverse cowgirl position. Deciding to tease him slightly you began to grind against his cock. His cock goes between your folds as you slide back and forth. You teasing him this way was also giving you pleasure. You slightly moaned, your hands were behind you against his abs. “I'm gonna cum just by doing this~~~~~.” biting your lower lip.  You heard a groan coming from Draken, his cock is coated with your saliva and juices, lifting yourself up slightly with your hand wrapped around his cock you slowly slid yourself inside of you just like the first time you had to adjust to his tumescent size cock in your tight cunt. Both of your feet were on the outer side of Draken's thighs  You began to move up and down slightly doing a circular motion, tossing your head back slightly. 

“Haah... Uugh.. Aaah~~” Draken was muttering, as you continued to ride his cock. You felt your orgasm coming in as you began to grind against him, stimulating your clit against him. Your painting was becoming more known to him. “Cum for me ______. I want you to cum all over my cock like a good girl. You're a good girl aren’t you?” 

“Y-yes I’m a good girl Draken~~” you whimper. His hands reaching around his fingers coated with his saliva as he began to play with your clit more. “I’m coming.” you squeezed your eyes shut. “Draken, I’m coming~~~!” And with that sudden exclamation, your body tensed up, he could feel your clenching around his cock, your back arching from your sudden release, and your body felt light then grew heavy.  

Draken brings your bare back against his chest, the back of your knees draped over his. His cock began to thrust upwards into your cunt as you were still coming down from your high. He could feel your juices seeping from your cunt as his larger fingers still toying with your sensitive clit. Your head leaned against his shoulder you could hear his groan mixture of curse words spilling from his mouth. “You are so fucking wet ______. You feel so good clenching on my cock.” His free hand turns your head towards him. His lips latched onto yours before his lips met with your neck leaving a little gift behind.

“You're gonna make me cum again~~,” you whined as the climax was already brewing inside of you once. Your legs began to close on his hands which were still stimulating your clit. Panting a bit hard the tension of your body was taking over. “I want you to cum for me again,” he spoke in a husky voice looking at you as he was picking up the pack and how slippery your cunt was only sending him over the edge. “Cum for me ______.” he groaned.  A set of moans escapes your lips as you're close to an orgasm. Squirming, your cunt clenches as your hips and thighs shake, you struggle to keep my eyes open. Just the sight of you sent Draken into a frenzy thrusting motion. The sudden release inside your pussy sent you both into an orgasmic bliss.

~~~~~~~~

Ran drove to your home at about 11:30 pm. He couldn’t stop thinking about you. Just the kiss he stole yesterday was on his mind all day. He wanted you and he needed to show you how much he missed you. When getting to your home he didn’t see your car. “Where is she?” he said out loud. 

Staying in his car, he called your phone. No pick up….Ran began to wonder where you left and where you took his daughter. As it went to your voicemail “Hey doll, I just pulled up to the house and you're not home? Where are you and D/n at? Give me a call when you get this.” he hung up the phone. He waited for about 30 mins thinking you were going to come home anytime with a sleeping d/n in the back seat but your car didn’t appear. Ran was already starting to get something off now. Ran drove back to the club; his demeanor was more serious. When Rin saw him he wasn’t good. Thinking that he and you may have had an argument. His brother is going into the office. A few seconds later, Ran lit a cigarette walking to the small bar they had in their office. Pouring a drink Rin saw a cloud of smoke then his brother spoke “He is a dead man…I’m gonna kill that son of a bitch.”

To be continued.....

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[weepingchronicles]

I just read your hunter yandere head cannons, it was adorable and beautifully written, good job! <3 My question is: how do you think Hunter would help (y/n) transition into their new life with him?

a/n: eee tysm!! i love this question

tw: kidnapping, restraints, starving, drugging, manipulation

There was a couple of things I left purposefully out of the original post but Hunter originally wasn't going to take the reader that day, at least not till later. The reason he collected plushies from your house was to remind you of your actual home. The room for you wasn't actually finished, we don't want you sleeping on some old mattress now, do we?

But because of how things turned out... his plans were a bit rushed. So, you'll be sleeping on only a mattress for awhile till he saves up. Maybe he'll even clean his room for you to sleep on his bed while he sleeps on the couch. Maybe. It's too risky since the only thing stopping you from escaping is the chain connected to the bedframe.

Once he actually saves money, he'll spend time actually decorating and making your room well, your room! Depends on how cooperative you are of your situation but he will definitely try and ask you what kind of things you want. No, reader you can't go outside I asked what books you wanted-

Anyway, he sees this as making your kidnapping more adaptable since it's just like your old room! Except with chains making sure you can't leave and tons of locks on each door!

Another thing is that he is very patient! Of course you're going to be scared, confused and angry when you awake after being fucking tranquilized! Hunter, he gets mad easily but he never really loses control around you. He is delusional in thinking he is protecting you and giving you a home but deep down, he knows it is wrong hurting you and flipping out is expected.

Once you "settle down" and stop screaming every time he comes in your room, he'll give you certain privileges for good behavior. Oh, you want to watch tv? Then you'll have to eat the food he makes you(most of the time it's drugged).

If you misbehave however, like hurting him, trying to escape or just overall doing what you're not supposed to he'll take away basic necessities. You hurt him badly enough he'll lock you in the room for a day, no food or water. If he catches you trying to pick your chain, oops, you just lost your whole bed for a week. Now you're even more restrained with your hands and feet tied. Which means he'll have to feed you and carry you to the bathroom if you need to go, which is NOT fun.

Soon, you'll start following the rules whether you want to or not. You might still be plotting escape or hating his guts but he doesn't really care.

He'll also be kind of sweet? Like, picking flowers on his way home that reminded him of you or make smiley face pancakes. Getting a cute teddy bear or gum at a corner store. Very dad things. I don't know about you but if you're anything like me, if I hate someone, it's kind of impossible for me to be rude if they are nice to me. You'll begrudgingly accept his gift and mutter a thanks and he's all like :D

[mewpangxin]

⊹˚ Loneliness ࿐

FT. Malleus Draconia X GN! Reader.

( TW: Angst — It's Malleus suffering hours! )

“Is there a point to be a king if I'm unwanted? What use is my power if it's not for you?”

─── ‎♪ 𓈒𓂃꙳･ ꪔ̤̥ ‎♪ 𓈒𓂃꙳ ───

𓆸 AND WHAT COMES to one's head when you say his name? Would it be the congeniality? Liveliness? He believes not, it's horror that strikes their beings.

Perhaps he was destined to linger like this.

And he did until you tumbled into him that is.

You were a bearer of a plethora of aliases by them.

A magicless student.

A beast tamer.

An enigma.

You were well-known in the beginning because of the absurdity your crew did. Malleus was worried for you, why are you always in risky situations as these?

He grew accustomed to being with you.

His mind revolves around what you say, your capabilities and your thoughts about his character.

Malleus treasures you.. he understands this.

However, he could not confess even if you may be viewing him in the same way as how he sees you.

That's what this means to be a prince.

You don't know how much it anguished him for it.

To love in which he has no right to have.

•━━━━༻❝ 🐉 ❞༺ ━━━━•

Lilia helps him with his skills in culinary.

Malleus turns that down and went away.

He was appreciative.. since he doesn't have the appetite, the housewarden gloomily walked out.

A wise decision.

•━━━━༻❝ 🐉 ❞༺ ━━━━•

He thought of scenarios about this.. what if you choose Twisted Wonderland? What if you like him?

Would he be able to give up being an heir?

To forgone— everyone and it all for you?

The answer to this was unputdownable.

Because he does not understand how he'll select.

And will you call him as yours?

Malleus can dream about those illusions of his.

Not that it can ever be a reality.

“Hoho~ What could be troubling you?”

The older fae swooshed in from a tree branch above, his vice head had that cheery grin radiating to him.

“It's nothing. I am strolling here as per usual.”

“Drop that, you are thinking about that person, aren't you, hm? Why the solemnity and no less by you?”

The housewarden of Disasomnia wished Lilia was not as discerning, though he was a general before. Why wouldn't he be witty or profound than Malleus?

“.. Something in me said that I should whisk them away from here and take them to a faraway...”

The taller male admits his deplorable behavior.

“I could make that true for you.”

Who was Lilia to go against his words?

“Humans wouldn't be okay with it.”

Malleus spoke as he halted before Lilia persisted.

“Child, when were we heroes in these stories? If you don't do anything to it, you'll hurt yourself.”

Is that it? The dorm leader carped at this.

“I care for them, so I will not..”

And in his, it rung out pyrrhic and empty to himself.

“You'll torment yourself, Malleus.”

And you'll be saddened after it— was unsaid.

“Then so be it.”

It came out as he gazed the horizon, cloudless nights with moonlight shining through. It seems he was a blank canvas, he was doomed to be by himself.

The protector did not look frisky with him.

His poignancy will be worth your smile, it has to be.

[darkskywishes]

Levi and Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

TW: mentions of rape and childhood sexual abuse

Throughout the course of Attack on Titan, and even before the canon timeline, Levi experiences innumerable traumas, not the least of which are repeatedly experiencing the deaths of his closest friends and comrades. By the end of the series, Levi has lost every single person he had been close to, being the last of the Survey Corps' veterans. Given the truly immense amount of traumatic events Levi suffers, it'd be difficult to believe that he wouldn't have post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), and indeed, he does display several key features of the disorder.

Paraphrased, the DSM-5-TR PTSD criteria are as follows (American Psychiatric Association, 2022, p. 301):

Criterion A: stressor (one required)

The person was exposed to: death, threatened death, actual or threatened serious injury, or actual or threatened sexual violence, in the following way(s):

Direct exposure

Witnessing the trauma

Learning that a relative or close friend was exposed to a trauma

Indirect exposure to aversive details of the trauma, usually in the course of professional duties (e.g., first responders, medics)

Criterion B: intrusion symptoms (one required)

The traumatic event is persistently re-experienced in the following way(s):

Unwanted upsetting memories

Nightmares

Flashbacks

Emotional distress after exposure to traumatic reminders

Physical reactivity after exposure to traumatic reminders

Criterion C: avoidance (one required)

Avoidance of trauma-related stimuli after the trauma, in the following way(s):

Trauma-related thoughts or feelings

Trauma-related external reminders

Criterion D: negative alterations in cognitions and mood (two required)

Negative thoughts or feelings that began or worsened after the trauma, in the following way(s):

Inability to recall key features of the trauma

Overly negative thoughts and assumptions about oneself or the world

Exaggerated blame of self or others for causing the trauma

Negative affect

Decreased interest in activities

Feeling isolated

Difficulty experiencing positive affect

Criterion E: alterations in arousal and reactivity (two required)

Trauma-related arousal and reactivity that began or worsened after the trauma, in the following way(s):

Irritability or aggression

Risky or self-destructive behavior

Hypervigilance

Heightened startle reaction

Difficulty concentrating

Difficulty sleeping

Criterion F: duration (required)

Symptoms last for more than 1 month.

Criterion G: functional significance (required)

Symptoms create distress or functional impairment (e.g., social, occupational).

Criterion H: exclusion (required)

Symptoms are not due to medication, substance use, or other illness.

--

I've indicated the symptoms that apply to Levi, or that I believe likely apply, based on canon content in purple. Let's go one by one.

Criterion A: stressor

During the canon timeline, Levi was exposed to both large amounts of death and threatened death, primarily due to titan casualties, but also due to the circumstances of poverty and deprivation in the Underground. Notable examples include witnessing his mother die and decay while he starved as a young child; Furlan and Isabel's deaths; the deaths of Petra, Oluo, Gunther, and Eld during the Female Titan arc; the loss of Kenny; Erwin and the new recruits' suicide charge against the Beast Titan; and Hange's sacrifice.

Levi experienced multiple instances of serious injury, with the most significant being his injuries resulting from the thunderspear explosion and the Battle of Heaven and Earth. Given the nature of blast injuries, it is likely Levi suffered from internal damage—in particular, rupture of the respiratory and hollow organs, such as the lungs and bowels. We're also shown he suffered complete separation of the index and middle fingers of his right hand, as well as ocular damage to his right eye. A concussion and perhaps a traumatic brain injury following the blast is also likely, as well as hearing damage. Following the Battle of Heaven and Earth, he also experienced significant injuries to one of his legs, necessitating the use of a wheelchair three years post-Rumbling.

In regard to actual or threatened sexual violence, Levi was born and lived in a brothel, in which his mom was a prostitute. It's not an exaggeration to say Levi was likely the result of rape. Given the circumstances of his upbringing, it's also likely he witnessed the sexual encounters between his mother and the brothel's patrons and was perhaps sexually abused himself when his mother was unable or unavailable to protect him. Given the Bad Boy panel previews, we also know he was directly threatened with sex trafficking on at least one occasion.

Only one stressor is required to meet this criterion, and Levi meets all of them. He very much fits the profile of someone with complex trauma or C-PTSD, although that diagnosis has not yet been added to the DSM.

Criterion B: intrusion symptoms

Canon evidence of intrusion symptoms is a bit harder to find, given the heavy plot focus of Attack on Titan; however, I do believe there is enough to make some inferences.

During the Uprising arc, Levi takes note of a starving woman with her baby on multiple occasions, who appears to remind him of his mother. This indicates to me that he thinks of his mother and the circumstances in which he grew up with her with some regularity.

When he later confronts Kenny in the same arc, he specifically questions Kenny regarding the relationship he had with his mother, again indicating that Levi's mother took up significant space in his thoughts.

While we know Kuchel chose to keep Levi (rather than abort him), thus indicating Levi was a desired baby, it's evident that Levi's upbringing overall was damaging and distressing due to the severe poverty, food insecurity, and violence he endured as a young child. Accordingly, it's safe to assume that these memories related to his mother were likely to be both unwanted and upsetting.

We also have this panel during the War for Paradis arc, during which Levi ruminates on the deaths of his comrades and the purpose behind having saved Eren's life so many times. His facial expressions are truly crushing and filled with deep despair.

In terms of nightmares, we know that Levi experiences some truly disturbing dreams from the "Smartpass Good Night, Dear and Sweet Dreams Vol. 02" short story, in which he envisions his closest comrades all morphing into a sea of blood on a red carpet. Clearly, the affect of his dream has been influenced by the specter of death constantly looming over him.

Criterion C: avoidance

The full phrasing of this symptom (trauma-related external reminders) is, "Avoidance of or efforts to avoid external reminders (people, places, conversations, activities, objects, situations) that arouse distressing memories, thoughts, or feelings about or closely associated with the traumatic event(s)." Similar to the unwanted upsetting memories symptom under Criterion B, there is not direct canon evidence, but I do believe there is enough to make some inferences.

Primarily, what sticks out to me about Levi is the fact that no one near him seems to have knowledge of his past, which indicates he does not talk about it. When his past is brought up, it's always people who have some direct knowledge about it speaking on it (e.g., Kenny or Erwin). This is shown both directly in canon, such as when Petra speaks to Eren regarding the rumors of Levi's recruitment into the Survey Corps, and in supplemental Smartpass content, like the Close Up interview with Erwin and Levi.

This comes across to me as an effort to avoid conversations, and thus, reminders and memories about the topic.

Criterion D: negative alterations in cognitions and mood

There's quite a lot of evidence for these in canon.

In terms of overly negative thoughts and assumptions about oneself or the world, Levi has plenty. He appears to have the persistent belief that he only exists to be of service and use to others; he views himself as a tool, one which has no value if he is not directly contributing to something. This is exemplified by the following panels:

When Erwin asks Levi if he would be willing to be in charge of keeping the titan serum and determining whom to use it on, Levi answers with, "Why would you bother asking me?" This shows that Levi has no regard for his own personal feelings.

When Erwin and Levi are discussing the plan to take down the Beast Titan during the Reclamation of Wall Maria, Levi expresses his agreement with the plan by remarking that taking down the Beast Titan will act as him "[making] amends for failing to kill that armored brat earlier." This shows that Levi viewed it as his responsibility, and thus, his failure to take down Reiner. He placed an undue burden on himself here, casting blame for outcomes that should not be solely attributed to him.

And then there's this panel in the lead-up to the final battle, in which a severely wounded Levi is being reprimanded by Armin for being reckless and not resting, in light of his injuries. Levi responds, "... You want me asleep in bed? You're going to forget I even exist if I rest any longer." Levi suffered truly disabling injuries, and yet, he shows complete disregard for himself—concerned that no one will remember him if he is not actively fighting. This shows a projection of his own lack of self-worth onto how he believes others view him: if he is not useful, then he does not matter. Levi also shows disdain at the concept of resting and having been asleep, as if that's somehow a sign of laziness on his part, which is of course, untrue. No one would have faulted him for resting—he truly needed and deserved to rest.

We also know that Levi blamed himself for Kenny leaving him, which can be surmised from interviews with Isayama and the expression on Levi's face when Kenny abandoned him. Levi also asks Kenny why Kenny left him, which shows a certain preoccupation on Levi's part, wherein he worried there must have been something inherently wrong with him to make Kenny leave.

On the topic of Kenny and Levi, Isayama is quoted as saying:

"Levi still had the experience of being separated from Kenny during his childhood. He was constantly troubled by the thought of "Kenny left because I couldn't fulfill his expectations." When the Uprising occurred within the walls, and he confronted Kenny again as an enemy, Levi sought to meet what couldn't be satisfied previously." (x)

Regarding both negative affect and difficulty experiencing positive affect, Levi's expression and mood is frequently shown as depressed. There's a great post by @cosmicjoke on the topic. In terms of the latter, Levi laughs and smiles so infrequently that it's a significant moment at the conclusion of the Uprising arc when he smiles after Historia playfully punches him.

For decreased interest in activities, the full phrasing is, "Markedly diminished interest or participation in significant activities." Levi's character is contrasted with all the other characters in the series in the sense that he has no dreams of his own. Both Armin and Hange have that greater curiosity about the unknowns of the world, represented by the sea and titans; Erwin is similar in that he desired to validate his dad's theories about the outside world and the existence of other humans; Eren craved freedom above all else; etc. Levi, on the other hand, is never shown as having those same dreams and ambitions. Hence, I would say he demonstrates a markedly diminished participation in significant activities, as even though his complete lack of self-interest is immensely admirable, it is also deeply tragic—particularly as dreams and ambitions are often crucial for one's psychological well-being.

And then we also have feeling isolated, for which the full phrasing is, "Feelings of detachment or estrangement from others." On the topic of Levi and relationships, Isayama is quoted as saying, "It’s likely because he is afraid of forming close relationships. Because he exists in a world where one can be eaten by a Titan at any time, he consistently avoids building 'family'-like connections with others." (x)

This manga panel is a good example of how Levi views himself as detached from others. Pay attention to the phrasing: "And I doubt normal people think about these things on a daily basis... So that means I'm abnormal... Probably because I've seen far too many abnormal things."

Criterion E: alterations in arousal and reactivity

With all of the above laid out, Criterion E becomes very easy to meet.

For irritability or aggression, this is one of Levi's known character flaws, borne as a result of his upbringing.

For risky or self-destructive behavior, we have clear instances of Levi engaging in battle to the detriment of his physical well-being.

For hypervigilance, the last manga panel I attached provides a good example of that.

For difficulty sleeping, Levi is famously an insomniac, often quoted as getting 2-4 hours of sleep a night.

Criterions F, G, and H: duration, functional significance, and exclusion

Have the duration of Levi's symptoms been greater than one month? Yes.

Do the symptoms result in distress or functional impairment? Yes.

Are the symptoms more attributable to the physiological effects of a substance or another medical condition? No.

Thus, Criterions F, G, and H are met.

Citations

American Psychiatric Association. (2022). Trauma- and stressor-related disorders. In Diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders (5th ed., text rev.).

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

(TW: Sex - educational context, HIV prevention)

My dear lgbt+ kids,

After my last post about HIV, I received multiple asks like "I feel embarrassed to ask something so stupid but..." - and the pure fact that I got multiple of them already proves that not knowing something is no reason to be embarrassed!

Many people are not super confident in their HIV knowledge. Acknowledging that and seeking more info is a great thing. I decided to put all these questions in one post:

How do you even get HIV?

Certain body fluids can transmit HIV:

blood

semen (cum)

pre-seminal fluid (pre-cum)

rectal fluids

vaginal fluids

breast milk.

Most adults who get HIV get it through sex (vaginal or anal) or sharing needles (or other drug injection equipment). Getting it from oral sex is also possible but less common.

Parent-to-child transmission (birth, breastfeeding) is the most common way that children get HIV.

Can you get HIV from topping?

Yes. Both the top and the bottom can get HIV through penetrative sex (top means you are penetrating your partner, bottom means your partner is penetrating you).

During anal sex, the bottom has a higher risk. That's because HIV can enter the body through the rectum’s thin lining. But: HIV can also enter the body through the opening at the tip of the penis or the foreskin or small cuts/scratches/sores anywhere on the penis.

During vaginal sex, either partner can get HIV as well, through vaginal tissue, the cervix or the penis as described above.

Can you get HIV from kissing?

You can’t transmit HIV through saliva, so there would need to be blood (or another fluid of the ones named above) involved. That means you could theoretically get HIV from open-mouthed kissing if both partners have sores or bleeding gums - but this is very rare.

You can’t transmit HIV at all through closed-mouthed kissing.

Can you get HIV from a public toilet?

The only realistic risk of getting HIV from a public toilet is by having sex or sharing drug equipment in there!

HIV does not survive long outside the human body (like on the toilet seat or door handle) and it cannot reproduce outside a human host. Wash your hands, as there are other germs that do survive on surfaces, but don't worry about HIV.

Can you get HIV from getting a tattoo?

You theoretically could - if the equipment or ink has someone else’s blood in it. This is unlikely to happen unless the person doing your tattoo uses unsterilized needles.

If you get a tattoo or piercing, make sure that the person doing the procedure is properly licensed and uses only new or sterilized equipment.

Can you get HIV from masturbating?

No. The only possible way would be if there were bodily fluids from an infected person on your fingers or sex toys.

It's always a good idea to wash your hands first because there could be other germs/irritants on them - but if you are doing it all alone, there is no risk of HIV. If you are masturbating together with another person, try to avoid sharing toys. If you do share them, use a new condom for each partner.

Can you get HIV from drinking alcohol?

When we talk about transmission via drug use, we are talking about sharing needles or drug equipment - they may have someone else's blood on them.

Alcohol use doesn't involve needles, you can not directly get HIV from being drunk. But: being drunk (or high) can lead to risky behavior that sober you wouldn't participate in, such as unprotected sex! It's a good idea to be careful around alcohol.

Isn't there a cure for HIV by now?

No. Once you have HIV, you have it for life - but the good news are there is treatment available! Someone who is HIV-positive and starts receiving treatment early has a normal life expectancy.

Medicine can reduce the amount of HIV in the blood (this is called viral load). In fact, it can make the viral load so low that a test can’t detect it anymore - and if you have an undetectable viral load, you will not transmit HIV to others!

With all my love,

Your Tumblr Dad

[sleepyboywrites]

Hiii, are you accepting requests? If the answer is yes then...

Would you consider writting a ticci toby x m! reader where cannibalism is their way of showing love? I dont mean full on k1lling and eating, perhaps biting and lick1ng blood...small bits but nothing too risky for anyone to die.

I'd love to see this, have a nice day/night :3333

Yes! oskgjrifjwi. You don't know how happy this makes me because what better way to get through hard times and back into writing than writing mild to heavy cannibalism. In this one mild, as you requested no death. :) Oh this one is going to get a bit saucy I already know, I'm sorry, I'm so so sorry. Nothing too explicit but, I mean, it's basically impossible to write cannibalism in a way that isn't saucy, it's inherently an intimate act, and even more impossible when writing it between consenting parties.... *acting bewildered* who said that...anyways... I hope you like it, and I did a good job! -///-'' (after writing edit: I feel the need to mention I'm 18...so I guess I'm technically "allowed" to write/read stuff like this or more 'extreme' but hhhhh)

Ticci-Toby x cannibal! Male Reader - Eat Me~

Tw- Mild/Light Cannibalism, biting, drawing blood, gnawing on skin you know cannabilistic behaviors. Making out, neck action, praise.

It's not a secret that you bite, a many of your partners in your past were less than pleased when you'd give them a "love bite" that drew blood and even less pleased when you licked the wound clean instead of cleaning it with soap and water so you learned your lesson to let people know upfront that you're a biter and you bite hard.

It's become almost a joke to your current boyfriend and his odd character housemates. "Watch out he's a biter, it's his love language.~" A few scattered tics or whistles in his speech as he introduced you for the first time. It was a 'joke', you had been very good about not biting this far, scared that Toby was just another person who was 'into biting' that was only okay with it until you broke skin in which case they're cursing your name as they force you to drive them to the ER and never call you back.

"We'll believe it when we see it," was the general consensus, a certain blue hoodied individual raising his eyebrow at you, you had laughed awkwardly before Toby took you to his room.

It started out as a movie date, holed up in his room watching a movie he'd seen a thousand times and you'd never seen so he insisted that you watch it with him. You guys have been dating for a while, and you had successfully avoided biting him despite his protests and reassurance that it'd be okay, and he might not even feel it. You like Toby, love him even, and didn't want to wig him out.

Halfway through the movie Toby begins kissing your neck slowly moving up to your lips as he begins to make out with you. As things further heat up he begins kissing your neck again, you bury your head into his shoulder and as he riles you up further you find your teeth grazing against his neck at increasingly hard pressures. Tongue pressing against his skin as you taste him, wanting to taste more. You're breathing shakily and about to pull away when you feel his fingers entangled in your hair, "That's it sweetheart, you can do it, it's okay." Toby encourages softly as he pushes your head closer to his neck again, tilting his head slightly to give you better access, biting into your neck first, hard enough to draw blood and to show you it's okay. An action that throws your self control out the window as you bite hard enough to not only draw blood but leaves a small chunk of his skin in your mouth as well. "Attaboy.... there you go..." Toby hissed softly as you chewed and swallowed his skin. Still caressing the back of your head as you lean back in to lick the wound his blood dripping down your chin as you consume the sweet liquid.

"More?" You asked softly after pulling away. You had been so good holding back up till this point but all the times you held back were rushing to you and as you thought of all the times you didn't you craved more.

"Good boy for asking." Toby replied lifting your chin to look at him before kissing you, gently blood and saliva mixing as you made out for a little while more. Toby then shifted his shirt to expose the opposite shoulder as he began kissing your neck again. "Go for it."

With the green light you bit him again, this time only enough to draw prickles of blood as you lapped up the crimson liquid that beaded through a perfect impression of your teeth in his skin. Eternally pleased as Toby held you close as you trailed kisses up his neck before biting down again a little deeper for a more solid blood flow but still only enough to draw blood, licking the wounds and once you pulled back Toby was still there. Gazing lovingly at you before kissing you again.

A little while later once both of you had cooled down, were patched up, and rewatched the movie seeing as Toby got distracted by "The prettiest boy he's ever seen" and couldn't resist his urges and distracted you from it entirely the first time. The two of you had a conversation.

"You aren't angry at me? You liked it?" You ask him gently looking down into your lap half-expecting him to chew you up and kick you out.

"What? Oh you're talking about the biting. Oh you sweet stupid boy, yes, obviously I like it. In all honesty I've been waiting for it since our first 'I love you' because you described it as how you showed love. I was worried you didn't actually love me since you hadn't bit me yet." He pulls you close to him, your head resting on his chest. Allowing you to feel his sincerity through his heartbeat. "Part of the reason I made a move on you today to begin with... the thoughts kept jumbling around you and if you actually loved me until I physically couldn't think of anything but you."

"I swear I do! I just didn't want you to leave me or be scared off by my... odd acquired taste.." You muttered in response listening to his heartbeat contently as he laughs wholeheartedly.

"I know, you were gnawing on my fingers all movie, I know you love me. Also you don't need to hold back with me, just to say it plainly incase you were thinking of putting the lid back on that box because I'd prefer if you didn't." He said sincerely before letting the laugh and teasing consume his voice. "Yeah, mhm... You mean your cannabilistic tendencies?"

"Oh my god, shut up Tobes!" You laughed embarrassed before hiding your face in his chest again finding comfort in the hiccups and heaves as laughs as well as his heartbeat and breathing. "I'm not a full cannibal anyways, I'd never fully consume you."

"Liar you already have, at least five of my thoughts at all times include you and 5/10 times they all swirl to you anyways." He laughs as he kisses the top of your head. "Also eat me, if you want me to shut up that bad you're going to have to make me." He teased pulling away from you slightly as he smirks at you.

"Oh really, tough shot?" You lean up and start to kiss him again. The progression starts as short sweet kisses before you take his bottom lip in-between your teeth biting down until your canines break licking the blood that drips down his chin kissing him repeatedly and softly afterwards.

[thecarnivorousmuffinmeta]

tw: suicide mention

you've talked a few times about how Bella jumping off the cliff actually was a suicide attempt, but on the other hand she didn't want Laurent to kill her

What do you think is the reason for that? The time that passed? or was it more subconscious like jumping off a cliff 'for fun' is fine, being actively killed by a vampire is not?

The thing about Bella is that while I believe she was attempting suicide, and everyone else besides Bella canonically believes that was a suicide attempt no matter what she tells them, Bella herself doesn't.

She insists throughout the rest of the series that it wasn't a suicide attempt and is very surprised when everyone else assumes it was. She just thought she wanted to see Hallucination Edward again.

That said, I count it as one. First is that suicides are not always meticulously planned or rationally thought out, or even rationally acknowledged afterwards, sometimes yes, but sometimes someone in a bad mental state just takes advantage of opportunities presented. In the aftermath, Bella herself might only recognize it as "oh, I was just engaging in risky behavior again to see Hallucination Edward, the same way I've been doing several times before. I don't actually want to die". And we do see her considering doing it because of Hallucination Edward but what gets me is that, as she realizes she's going to drown, her calm acceptance of the fact. She's underwater, she doesn't know which way's up, she knows she's going to run out of air soon and there's no one to rescue her and no one knows where she's gone and she immediately accepts her death and even acts quite relieved that she's going to be with Hallucination Edward.

To me, Bella in New Moon engages in riskier and riskier behavior to see her hallucination, yes, but also to seek relief from the emotional pain she's been feeling. She doesn't want to commit suicide, at least, not purposefully, and she does try to get out of situations she gets herself into even when it seems hopeless, but she engages in activities that very well could kill her, tries halfheartedly to get out of these situations when they occur, but if her best efforts are for naught and she's dying anyway... maybe it's for the best?