#was cause I was helping her set up and I eventually left at like 8 (when the party started)

[selenascorner]

THIN LINE - M.S. 𓍯𓂃

·˚ ༘ disclaimer: This is a SERIES, so you'll eventually find more parts on my profile. I'm pretty much excited for this, since I've never done anything like this before. Special thanks to @luverboychris & @evieolo that gave me a hand. Kisses, mwah !!!

·˚ ༘ pairing: Matt Sturniolo x fem!reader

·˚ ༘ summary: Ever since Matthew started an unfounded rumor about you, a strong hostility has existed between you both. However, due to attending the same college, classes, meetings, and parties, it's impossible to avoid him. Over time, tension sparks a shift in dynamics, leading to unexpected revelations and surprisingly, hate is the only thing drawing you both closer.

·˚ ༘ warnings: MDNI, 18+ content, bully!matt, playboy!matt, toxicity, jealousy, cursing, angst, bulling, crying, mention of sex.

01. Unified Divergence ᥫ᭡ .ᐟ

˗ˏˋ "you again?" ´ˎ˗

The day started differently, not like any other. You sighed are you were getting mentally prepared for another week of college classes that seemed to stretch into eternity. Time was against you this morning, with your 8 a.m. chemistry class looming and it already being 7:46 a.m. Oversleeping had left you scrambling, trying to catch up with your morning routine. Brushing your teeth, combing your hair, picking out an outfit, and squeezing in a quick breakfast all had to be accomplished in a short time.

You darted into the bathroom, spurting toothpaste directly onto your tongue. 

Swiftly, you spread it over your teeth and scrubbed diligently with your toothbrush. The ringtone of your phone interrupted the silence, your eyes rolling in mild annoyance. You left the bathroom to get your phone, recognizing the caller ID as your best friend, Lorelai. She was your best friend despite a year difference, that caused you. Accepting the Facetime call, you were instantly greeted by her smiling face, which despite the pressing time and your tardiness, brought a smile to your face.

"Where’d you end up?” Lorelai asked, her voice somewhat obscured by the murmur of background noise.

“I’m- I kinda slept in,” you confessed, a sheepish grin spreading across your face. You had been up until this morning, attempting to finish your chemistry project, at the same time spending time to study for your physics test. “I was up until 5 a.m. trying to complete that infuriating chemistry project. But, guess what? Didn’t quite cut it.”

As you spoke, you continued getting ready, setting your toothbrush on your nightstand and propping your phone up on your bed. 

“I would help if I could,” Lorelai offered, her voice accompanied by a louder voice in the background pleading, “Come on, just let me see her!”

Your brows furrowed in confusion, wondering who was so eager to talk to you. Lorelai adjusted her phone to reveal Kingston, your other best friend. His expression was a mix of frustration and concern. 

“Why won’t you let me help, y/n? You know I’m a whiz at chemistry!” He gestured towards himself for emphasis.

With an air of reassurance, you responded, “You know it’s fine, King-. You've already got a lab partner and Sophia’s way better at chemistry than I am. I just need to find a partner of my own.” You then picked up the phone again to better frame yourself in the camera. Kingston responded with a comforting smile, and in spite of everything, you mirrored his expression.

“How about we just do the project at my dorm?” he suggested, a playful smirk on his lips. “It’s not like anyone’s gonna find out. A slight bending of the rules could be fun.” You shook your head at his suggestion and reached for your chemistry textbook.

“I need to head out now, Kingston. Also, prepare for a smack on your cheek, you sex addict.” You laughed, ending the call and thrusting your phone into your pocket. You exited your dorm room, pulling the door closed softly behind you, and sprinted towards your chemistry class.

Upon arriving, you were panting heavily and found the hallway outside the classroom to be deserted. The realization hit you - class had already started. Your hand hovered over the doorknob, every ounce of courage you had was required to turn the handle and face the consequences, knowing you were about to get yelled at.

“You gonna keep staring at that for a bit longer, pal?” The familiar voice behind you belonged to Matt, his arms folded over his chest and a serious expression on his face.

Your relationship with Matt had always been a complex one. He basically was the college heartthrob, while you were just an ordinary college student. However, things had taken a bitter turn when he spread a rumour about you, stating you were a lesbian simply because you were a virgin. That was the reason that ignited the animosity between you.

“Fantastic,” you sighed, already dreading the confrontation with Matt.

“Never knew you were a vocal sigher,” Matt quipped, looking at you with an amused expression. You avoided his gaze, not wanting to escalate your growing anxiety.

“You need something, Matthew?” You asked, your tone laced with clear annoyance. On hearing this, Matt chuckled and rubbed his forehead.

“Actually, yes, I do. We're both late to the same class, right? I really need you to open that door for me, ‘cause we’re both already late. You gonna make it, hm?” His nonchalant words and his hum sent a chill down your spine, causing you to involuntarily bite your lower lip.

Not wishing to further engage with him, you stepped back and gestured towards the door handle. Matt raised an eyebrow, chuckled, and shook his head before pushing the door open just slightly. “That wasn’t so difficult, was it, dude?” He teased, using a nickname that made your skin crawl.

Matt stepped into the classroom first, and you followed suit. A wave of embarrassment washed over you as you felt the stern gaze of your professor.

“Well, isn't this a sight?” He remarked sarcastically. “A boy and a girl walking in late to class together. I expected as much from Mr. Sturniolo, but you, Miss y/l/n? That's a disappointment indeed.”

Your professor’s insinuations left you taken aback, but before you could offer any explanation, Matthew intervened.

“We didn’t do anything, sir. The only possible way I could be seen with her outside of class would be for a dare or down a payment.” Matthew’s words made you want to scream, but you bit back your anger and remained silent.

“Mr. Sturniolo, you must love getting into trouble, don't you?” The professor retorted, causing Matthew to groan beside you. A sense of satisfaction tingled in you at his discomfort.

“I assume neither of you managed to finish your assignment.” The professor's stern words were like a blow to the gut. You lowered your head, guilt washing over you. You’d spent the entire weekend engrossed in studying for an upcoming physics test, leaving no time to complete the assignment.

“Did either of you even start it?” He asked again, and his question was met with an uncomfortable silence. He sighed deeply, a look of disappointment crossing his face. 

“Alright then. I'm left with no other choice. Sturniolo, you're paired with y/l/n. Don’t bother objecting; my decision is final. The rest of the class has already submitted their projects. If I don’t see your simple wind turbine project on my desk by tomorrow, you both can expect a big, red F.”

With that, he dismissed you. As you turned to leave, you heard Matt grumble under his breath and head towards the back of the class where his friends were seated. They chuckled at him, clearly finding amusement in his predicament.

You took your usual seat next to Kingston, who was unusually silent. He kept stealing glances at you, causing your frustration to grow. 

Eventually, you sighed loudly and turned to face him. “What?” You asked, irritation seeping into your tone. He quickly snapped out of his thoughts and looked at you, his expression unreadable.

“Nothing,” he replied nonchalantly, resting his chin on his hand. You sighed audibly in frustration and slapped his hand away, causing his chin to drop slightly.

“Seriously, what’s wrong?” You insisted, growing weary of his silence. He rolled his eyes and finally responded.

“You fucking Sturniolo?” He asked bluntly. The question caught you off-guard and you immediately recoiled, taken aback by it.

“What? No!” You hissed, lowering your voice when you noticed the professor glancing in your direction. You quickly turned your attention back to your textbook, pretending to be engrossed in the lesson.

Once you were sure his attention was elsewhere, you turned back to Kingston. “Well, both of you were late and together. It doesn’t seem like a coincidence. You think I'm dumb or something?” He questioned, causing your frustration to boil over.

“Listen, Kingston. I don’t know why you’re acting this way, but you’re crossing a line. I told you, there is absolutely nothing going on between Matthew and me. The only feeling we have for each other is mutual hate. Understood?” You said, growing weary of his baseless accusations. He seemed to finally grasp the reality and nodded, picking up his pen.

“But what about the project? Whose dorm will you be working on it in?” He asked, chewing on his pen. You shook your head, not wanting to think about it. 

“Definitely not his,” you replied, focusing your attention back on the lesson.

After three gruelling hours of chemistry, you gathered your books and readied yourself for your next class. You picked up your physics textbook and planned to use your break to review the material while enjoying your sandwich.

As you made your way out of the class, you exchanged a few words with Kingston and spotted Matt heading towards the cafeteria. “Matthew!” You called out, standing on your tiptoes and waving your hand. He turned around, clenched his jaw, and rolled his eyes. His friends laughed at his reaction, whispering words you couldn’t quite make out.

He made his way to you through the crowd towards you as Kingston stepped away, giving you both space. “You again?” Matt asked, his tone brimming with annoyance. You lowered your gaze to your textbook, scanning the words of it as you spoke.

“I was thinking we could do the project at my dorm,” you suggested, looking up to assess his reaction. Matt looked around, sighed, and finally replied, “I thought you didn’t want anything that has to do with me, so it’s better off if you do it yourself, yeah?” He turned to leave, but you quickly caught his attention with your next words. 

“You do realize that if you don’t help, I’ll tell the professor that I did the project all by myself, right?” Matt turned back around to face you, a nervous chuckle escaping his lips. His gaze locked onto yours, making you slightly uncomfortable.

“You’re just adorable when you’re threatening me, aren’t you?” He replied, his hand rummaging through his pockets. 

"Look, I'm not giving you my phone number, don't even dream of that. My dorm, at 5 p.m. And that's it," he says in a curt tone. Without giving you the slightest chance to interject, he turns on his heel and leaves, dashing towards his group of friends. He shoots you one last look, a smirk spreading across his face as he joins his friends, laughing at you as well, leaving you alone with your frustration. Great, his dorm. 

After what feels like an eternity, your best friend, Lorelai, finally makes her way over to you.

"Hey, how you doin’?” she asks, her eyes darting around the busy hallway, searching for her friend. "Where on earth is Kingston?" she asks, a hint of annoyance creeping into her voice. Unable to provide a satisfying answer, you decide to make your way to the cafeteria with her, hoping that Kingston would eventually show up.

"He just sort of... left. But don't worry, I'm sure he'll be back soon. By the way, how was literature class?" you ask, trying to change the subject. Lorelai nods, her attention fixated on the avocado she's peeling with her teeth.

"Really, Lorelai?" you tease, unable to hide your amusement. "You couldn't just cut it up and put it in a box before class starts, could you?" She simply shakes her head, her eyes twinkling with mischief as she pulls out a spoon from her backpack's front pocket.

"Wow, you've got the whole set there," you say, your laughter echoing around the cafeteria. Unfazed, she scoops a spoonful of avocado, not even bothering to wait for you to sit down.

Finally finding a spot, you sit on the bench, your eyes scanning the cafeteria. That's when you spot Kingston, making his way towards you and Lorelai. A smile spreads across your face as you see him, a smile he returns with equal warmth. He takes a seat next to you, and with that, the three of you get lost in a conversation, the noise of your words mixed with your laughters cafeteria fading into the background.

4.43 p.m. •°. *࿐

You find yourself in the deserted hallway as you slowly make your way to Matthew's dorm room. A knot of anxiety forms in your chest, growing tighter with each step. You're aware that you're about to spend the next three and a half hours with the person you detest the most in the world, and to make matters worse, it will be in his dorm, his room.

You trudge down the quiet hallway, as you come to a halt in front of Matthew's dorm door. You take a deep breath, and decide to knock three times, each knock loud and clear. From behind the door, you hear a loud sigh, and suddenly the door swings open, revealing Matthew's figure looming in the doorway.

You stand there, frozen for a moment, as he scans what you’re holding in your hands, your shopping bag that contains the materials for your project.

Without a word, he takes it from your grasp and he turns and places it on his desk, his back towards you as you hesitantly step into his dorm. 

You cast a quick glance around the room, noticing how the rest of the dorm is a chaotic mess. But his area is a definitely different, surprisingly neat and organized. His bed is immaculately made, a bottle of cologne and a can of deodorant are neatly aligned on his nightstand, and his desk is spotless. There's not a single shirt out of place, as you can see the rest of the boys’ shirts on every piece of forniture, even on the floor.

"Why is nobody here?" You curiously ask, the question slipping out before you can stop it. You can't help but feel guilty for saying something first.

"I asked the others to leave," he responds, in an annoyed tone. "We wouldn't be able to concentrate with them around. They're too loud.” With that, he pulls up a chair and sits down, his attention now on the contents of the shopping bag.

He sifts through the various objects, each one carefully examined. As he does so, you silently take a seat on the chair, watching him.

"What's this stuff?" He finally breaks the silence, holding out a roll of tape.

"It's everything we need to build a wind turbine. Bottle, scissors, marbles, ruler. All that kind of stuff," you explain, trying to suppress the tension knotting in your stomach.

"I don't know how this works," he admits, shaking his head and withdrawing his hands from the bag.

"It's alright. We'll figure it out together," you say, trying to offer reassurance. A heavy silence fills the room. Maybe you shouldn't have said that.

"Okay. Just tell me what to do, I'll help you out," he says, almost surprising you. His willingness to help is music to your ears.

"Let's go through the bag and talk about what each item is for," you suggest. He nods in agreement, flipping the bag over and scattering its contents across the desk. You both delve into a detailed discussion about each item, its purpose, and its role in the project.

As the minutes tick by, he sits there, listening attentively. He doesn't interrupt or make any comments, just quietly absorbs what you're saying. He seems genuinely interested in the task at hand.

"Sorry, Matt--" You try to interject after about 30 minutes of explaining, feeling your throat sore, but he quickly cuts you off.

"It's Matthew for you," he corrects you, his gaze briefly meeting yours before returning to the marbles he has in his hands.

"Sorry. Could I get some water, please?" you ask, your throat dry from all the talking. He nods in response, carefully placing the marbles down, getting up from his chair. He strides towards the mini fridge, but as he reaches for the handle, his phone rings. He swiftly turns around, heading back towards his desk.

"I gotta pick this up. You get the water, it's in the fridge," he instructs before picking up his phone and moving away. You hear him mutter a few words, but they're too faint to make out.

With a sigh, you get up from your chair and head towards the fridge. As you open it, you're met with cans of beer, soda, bottles of water, and wine. You pick up a bottle of water but notice there aren't any glasses around. You decide to close the fridge and wait for Matthew's call to end, so you can ask him about it. Leaning against the fridge, you start to tap your foot in rhythm with your thoughts, the water bottle held tightly in your grasp.

a/n: my tags are working mad weird, idk why i gotta tag people like this lol. also i am/have never been into college. i don't know how lots of stuff works, so i did my best. i love writing, but also please feel free to correct me if some things are not right ! <3

taglist 🏷 : @inkyray @hysteria-things @spaznongirl @worldlxvlys @nickgetsmewetter

@patscorner @deftonesmatt @riasturns @vanteguccir @sturniololoverssblog

@luverboychris @imwetforyourmom @bambi-slxt @cindylcuwho @freshloveforthefit

@sturnioz-replies @mattscoquette @evieolo @cartierhalo @sturnthepot

[rosicheeks]

🥰🔪

[novacqnes]

may i request a fic for ellie williams x fem!reader where ellie hasn't come home from patrol and the reader's worried to the point where she's crying but then eventually they both reunite, and turns out ellie has been planning for it so she proposes to the reader 😭 i'm a sucker for angst with a fluff ending, and maybe semi smut at the end, i'm sorry if that's too much 😳

don’t ever leave me // ellie williams

warning: brief mentions of blood, angst, smut, scissoring, fingering, top!ellie

pairing: ellie williams x fem reader

a/n: done and done, thank you for the request 🫶🏾

“what do you mean she isn’t back yet?”

the words felt like hundreds of speeding trains bustling towards you. they echoed throughout your mind tauntingly, as you stood paralyzed by dina’s news. not a single person had seen ellie since 10 am that morning and it was now over 8 hours later. you wanted to be calm but it was simply too late for it. 

ellie could wander but this time it felt different- she would’ve told you, or at least said something if she’d planned on being out for long. yet she was gone before you could even say goodbye. 

your stomach turned with nausea, causing bile to steadily rise within the back of your throat. you cupped your hand over your mouth to suppress it, but there was no hiding the growing dread plaguing your mind. 

“she told me she’d catch up i just thought—“

“well you thought wrong.” you hissed, forcing dina’s cheeks to burn a deep red hue. 

with each passing second the possibility of ellie being hurt or even dead grew exponentially. there was a reason for patrol and partners held a purpose. without them you were much more susceptible to being attacked, going missing or the thousands of other threats that lay in the deep woods. so although it wasn’t dina’s fault entirely you couldn’t help but take your anger out on her. 

jesse began, “we can go out and look at first light—“

“first light? ellie could be hurt for all we know i’m not leaving her out there.”

the thought of your girlfriend alone in the woods, possibly clinging to life brought you to tears. they brimmed your eyes, burning their way through as you fought to contain them, refusing to lose it in front of your friends. however, rather quickly, dina and jesse morphed into blurred figures, proving that you were failing. 

your heart ached and chest burned, it grew increasingly more difficult for you to breathe. you didn’t want to know life without ellie, you couldn’t bear the thought. you wanted to feel her skin, kiss her over and over again, hoping she knew just how much you loved her. you needed her. 

“screw it— i’ll look for her myself.” you trembled, worry seeping into your voice. 

the two protested but you refused to spare them a glance, turning sharply on your heel. the minute your back was turned the tears came pouring, staining your cheeks. the air inside of your lungs grew scarce and less frequent, sending a sharp thumping pain to your head— but you had to keep walking. 

with each step the pain was magnified, traveling all throughout your body. your limbs felt as if they weren’t yours and you couldn’t control them. your legs were heavy, making movement more ever more excruciating. stumbling a bit further your left leg gave out and then your right until your entire body collapsed. 

the hard pavement scraped your knees leaving blisters and budding bruises all over your legs. despite it all you couldn’t move any further, succumbing to horror that ellie might truly be gone. your face fell into the palms of your hands, offering you slight comfort as you sobbed, overcome with sorrow and apprehension. 

after what felt like hours, a long set of arms wrapped around your weak form, pulling you into a warm embrace. the person smelled of firewood and maple, reminding you of ellie’s aroma every morning. the calming lull of their heart beat eased you out of your nightmare prompting you to look up and see their beautiful face. 

ellie’s auburn hair was pulled back but a few strands fell across her forehead. her creamy skin was tinted with red, deepening at the apples of her cheeks. sweet freckles decorated her face bringing you relief that you’d never experienced before— it was like a dream. 

“how—how are you here?” you whispered, cupping your hands over her face, needing to ensure this was reality.

“i had to take care of something….why are you crying?” 

the words couldn’t make it to your lips fast enough, forming jumbled clauses that ellie was just barely able to make out.

something along the lines of, “dina said— patrol— you— missing.”

frowning, she brought her thumb up to your tear stained cheeks, wiping them clean. she didn’t bombard you with excuses, instead she brought your head to her chest allowing you time to just cry. your body shook against hers, allowing ellie to feel the pain that she’d caused you, and it broke her. 

“i’m sorry.”

you mumbled, “i’m just happy you’re okay, if anything would’ve happened to—“

“but nothing did. i’m here with you now.”

gently helping you off of the concrete, she placed soft kisses to your forehead, kindly reassuring you but you were unable to let go. her touch was the only true confirmation that ellie was there with you. and you feared that in letting go she wouldn’t be. 

she slipped an arm around your waist as you clutched onto her shoulders, painfully raising to your feet. when the two of you looked down you noticed the fresh crimson blood that stained your pants. more guilt mounted onto ellie’s chest as she leaned down to check, pulling herself away from you momentarily.

“no—no, i’m fine.”

“y/n, you’re bleeding,” she sighed. 

“ellie, i’m okay, we can take care of it later.” your voice faltered, planting more seeds of doubt in ellie’s mind but she wasn’t going to fight you. standing back up she returned to your side aiding you towards the direction of the woods. 

“where are we going?” you hummed. 

“i need to show you something—i promise it’ll make sense once we get there.” 

there were few noises in the woods besides the cracking of the leaves under your shoes and the sounds of nearby insects. it was dark, and you were only able to make out the shadowy gray figures of the trees that loomed over you. this should’ve been frightening, it mirrored a scene straight out of a nightmare, but you could hardly focus on it because your mind kept going to ellie. 

she seemed to glow, her eyes were brighter than ever and her skin beaming with color. her scent lingered, reminding you of blissful mornings with her. whenever she’d leave early for patrol she’d wake you with pancakes or waffles and the aroma of maple syrup. they served as your fondest memories together. 

however, the longer you walked the more antsy ellie got. her grip on your waist tightened and the thump of her heart rapidly increased. she pointed her flashlight up ahead, casting a dim light over a brown cabin, nearly disguised by trees. 

“dina and i found it a little while back, it’s pretty old but i was able to fix it up these last few weeks.”

as you neared the cabin you found that it was beautiful. the trail leading up to it was clear with thick logs covered in green moss on each side. lively green plants bloomed from the rich soil, creating a mini garden on the side of the house. the cabin was a light brown made up of oak logs, a brick chimney and a few small windows. 

“….you did all of this?”

“for the most part, although i had dina help with the inside—“

“wait a minute— she knew?” you sputtered, making a mental note to apologize to both her and jesse later. 

“yeah…listen y/n, i didn’t mean to scare you, i just wanted it to be nice.”

she took your hands in hers leading you towards the door. once she opened it you caught a whiff of maple coming all the way from the kitchen. as she led you inside you saw scented candles perched in every corner, illuminating the room. 

in the front part was a cozy emerald couch and in front an old projector. towards the back was a white hammock just a few feet away from the kitchen. inside was a wooden counter, small sink, pantry and a round picnic table with a flower vase in the center. towards the opposite side of the room lay a red door to which you assumed the only bedroom in the house. 

you were too shocked to notice that you’d let go of ellie’s hands, but you weren’t fearful because this had to be real.

“i don’t understand— is this for us?” you whispered in utter shock, pulling her towards you. your heartbeats joined in unison as she closed the gap, brushing the strands of hair from her face. 

“it is if you want it to be.”

there was more— there had to be. her eyes were heavy with fatigue but jubilant, she’d been up for god knows how long preparing all of it for you, but she wasn’t done. 

“i have to ask you something,” she whispered, her voice lighter than ever. 

ellie reached into her back pocket, producing a black box as she knelt at your feet. thousands of frenzied butterflies filled your stomach along with love, exultance and euphoria wrapping you in a cloak of warmth. looking into away ellie’s eyes you could simply drift as she gazed back in a way that nobody had before. 

“i think the first thing that brought us together was our need to be with someone. and for most of my life i’ve felt like that choice wasn’t up to me, loneliness was always the default— but for the first time i’m making the decision for it not to be. y/n, i want to spend the rest of my life, waking up to you, coming home to you and loving you.” 

she held open the box, inside lay a silver round cut halo ring. 

“will you marry me?”

the words rang in your mind, each time growing louder than the next. it was beautiful— she was beautiful. there were hundreds of things you wanted to say and do but it all boiled down to one word. 

“yes.” you joined her on the ground, ignoring the stinging pain from your knees, you cupped her face in your hands. 

“r-really?” she stammered, her heart beating faster than ever. 

“yes, yes,” you nodded, “i will marry you ellie.”

joyful tears brimmed your ears as she slid the band over your finger with shaky hands. she then slipped a finger under your chin tilting your face up to meet hers as she kissed you with great fervor. her lips were soft and sweet— and with the entire cabin to yourselves you had no reason to hold back. 

her calloused hands traveled to the hem of your shirt, pulling it off your body with deep desire. with that gone she snapped off your bra, exposing your bare chest. ellie brought her lips to your tits, cupping her palms over them as she sucked feverishly, drawing deep moans from your lips. releasing your nipple with a pop, her hand slid down to your jeans, toying with the buttons as she looked up at you with pure lust. 

“god ellie…i need you,” you purred.

“you have me.”

gently pushing you onto the couch she peeled your pants off, briskly running her hands over your legs. before going further she moved back, allowing you to watch as she tore each piece of clothing off. joining you on the sofa her hands slid down clothed cunt, circling her fingers around the sensitive flesh. 

“this where you you want me?” she smirked, applying just enough pressure to tease you. 

“mhm…”

she slipped a hand under the cloth using her finger to rub your clit. it felt perfect but you needed more, and the desperation was evident in your voice. 

“please fuck me—“

upon your request a digit entered your dripping hole as ellie used her thumb to play with your clit. the sight of you begging fueling her even more. she sped up, applying even more pressure to your g-spot sending a shiver up your spine. 

ellie knew that she could bring to the brink of an orgasm but she wanted to experience it with you. once your moans got a bit louder she knew you were right where she needed you and removed her hands from your core. before you could protest she removed the only thing that separated you, your underwear. spreading your legs a bit further she worked her way in between them, brushing her pussy against yours. 

the contact was warm and heavenly, you clung onto ellie’s legs slowly moving your hips to her rhythm. 

“shit that feels so good….” she groaned, leaning up to sloppily kiss you. deepening the kiss her tongue swirled over yours, moving your lips in unison. you couldn’t get enough of her touch pushing your hips against hers with much more vigor. 

you were so sensitive but ellie saw no end in sight. she adored the feeling of your wet pussy against hers chasing after the same end result. she was entranced by the obscenities that fell from your lips, they sounded like music to her ears.

“fuck me harder.” you whimpered, digging your nails into ellie’s skin as you grinded against her desperately. your thrusts became more and more sloppy with the increase in tempo, leaving you absolutely delirious. 

nearing a euphoric high ellie brought you closer to her fiery skin, clutching onto you with all of her might. she could feel herself succumbing to it. 

“close?” she mewled, pressing her eyelids closed as her entire body went still.

the words became caught in your throat and your vision blurred. the only thing you could register was a sweltering buzz under your skin that mirrored ellie’s. all you could do was shiver helplessly as the pleasure grappled your body, sending you into absolute oblivion. 

she pressed delicate kisses to your temple giving the both of you time to come down from your high together. the room was mellow and quiet, you hadn’t been there very long but it already felt like home. 

you fiddled with the silver band on your finger, glancing up at ellie’s clouded eyes. they were brighter than you’d ever seen them, so radiant. you wanted to savor this moment for as long as you could, her skin against yours, her vulnerability and beauty— as well as the warmth and serenity of your new home. you never wanted to be without it.

“hey el?”

“hm?” she gazed down at you, a small grin spreading across her lips. 

“don’t ever leave me again.” 

[sinner-sunflower]

A HH Lucifer-centric AU 12/?

PART 1, PART 2, PART 3, PART 4, PART 5, PART 6, PART 7, PART 8, PART 9, PART 10, PART 11, PART 13, PART 14, PART 15, PART 16, PART 17, PART 18, PART 19, PART 20, PART 21, PART 22

Fun fact:

I was supposed to include Heaven in this. The og plot was like Heaven was already friendly with them- like Luci's siblings, and they were supposed to be in the meeting back in chapter 4 and 5.

The argument would have been that Heaven is bound to help because Roo won't stop at Hell and it will eventually reach Heaven, making it their problem too.

But obviously I had a change of plans and I think this plot would be better.

A plot fit for a possible sequel, one might say.

Apologies for the shortness of the chapter but thank you still for the constant support! Your likes, reblogs, and comments are the things that give me inspiration to do this every day!

----------------------------------------------------

The good news is the problem has not reached any of the upper rings in his absence. The bad news? Sloth is almost devoured.

Overgrown roots have enveloped the main city's buildings, he can't even see the Goetia territory anymore. The blood-red flowers are still spewing black miasma and he can feel it slightly burn his skin.

Lucifer thinks that this is what real Hell looks like.

This means that everyone is just exerting enough power to keep it at bay but not enough to fully stop it. Lucifer was right in his decision to look for Goodie. Speaking of Goodie- the embodiment of good barely reacts. If she's being burned by the mist, she's doing a pretty good job of not showing it.

Goodie: Oh my. What trouble you are causing, Roo.

A fucking understatement but Lucifer won't argue. This is trouble, but a million times worse.

Lucifer: Let's go.

----------------------------------------------------

At one corner of Sloth, the Sins and the other higher powers of Hell have just finished another round of the sealing ritual. They've been going at it a month straight, there is no end in sight, and they are exhausted. Even Alastor is mostly drained as he is leaning a lot on his cane.

Beelzebub: Fuck! I knew this wasn't going to be easy but what the fuck?!

Someone scoffs.

Vox: Maybe if our dear king is here this would be over. Like, where the fuck is he huh??

Leviathan: Don't forget who you are speaking to, filthy sinner!

Vox: Oh boohoo. If we're all gonna die anyway, why should I be afraid of you? Should've known that absentee of a ruler left us all to rot after damning us here in the first place-

Vox suddenly finds a giant hand wrapped around his throat. It took him a few seconds of reconfiguration before he clearly saw who the fuck-

Vox: Fuckin- gah! Alastor!

Alastor has transformed into a taller, lankier, and more sinister of himself. Eyes turned into radio dials, face, and body adorned with glowing green stitches like a puppet whose master has on a string.

Alastor: Shouldn't frivolous televisions come with a silent setting?

Vox: Fuck! Off!

Alastor: Hahaha! What is the matter, Vox? You seem to have developed the illusion that you are the strongest person in the room. Shall I remind you of what came about your moth friend?

Velvette: You better let him go, old man!

Velvette yelled to back up Vox. She flinches as Alastor turns his head in her direction with a sickening snap of his neck.

Not wanting to back off, she was about to argue more when Carmila stepped in.

Carmila: Velvette! Cease this at once. Do you and the Vees have no self-preservation??

Velvette: Well- I- Vox's right and you lot know it! Great Lucifer called us all here, basically threatened us to help him fix a mess he caused, then fucks off to God knows where leaving us to practically kill ourselves for a mess, again, HE CAUSED!

The Sins and Goetia's have now transformed into their more monstrous forms at hearing the disrespect the lowly sinner said about their King.

Velvette and Vox are saved from near-permanent death by a commanding voice.

Lucifer: Kneel.

Everyone's bodies acted on their own. Their knees bled from the sudden contact on the ground.

None of them could move- try as they might. Their air became heavier, plus with the miasma, a lot of them were gasping for air. Nothing is coming in. They can't breathe. They can't-

They look up to see the King of Hell and an unknown woman. Unknown to most but the Sins very much recognize her as indicated by the widening of their eyes.

Satan: Goodie!

The woman giggles and waves cheerfully as if there wasn't a looming threat in the air.

Goodie: My, my. What big mouths you have~

----------------------------------------------------

What to look forward to in Part 13:

Some talks and reprimanding.

Another round of ritual.

The situation becomes worse.

Lucifer and Goodie's solution.

[n0v4t33z]

Dark Desires: Chapter III - Malice In Wonderland

Pairings: VampireCatHybrid~Seonghwa x Female Reader, VampireCatHybrid~Ateez x Female Reader

Genre: Horror, Angst, Romance, Vampire Ateez, Paranormal?

Word Count: 11.1 k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Violence, Language, mentions blood, Magic, Fantasy, Some Fluff, Highly Suggestive at times (This is a warning for the whole story overall)

Chapter specific: Non sexual nudity, death, kidnapping, lying and manipulation, suggestive, violence, themes of horror, hints at rocky relationship with parents (Will update if more come up)

Author's Note💌: Hi! Honestly I didn't think I was going to be able to make the Monday deadline because I was editing this on tumblr and I lost all my work?? I don't know why, I basically lost a whole days worth of progress and I had to start all over again which was frustrating but luckily I got it done just in time! Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, sorry if there are some parts that are a bit rushed I did try to fix them and lengthen them a bit. (Any mistakes I might have left unseen will be fixed at a later date!)🌙

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☽ ──── ༺𖤐༻ ──── ☾

It’s been 4 hours since they left and I’m not going to lie as time passes by the more scared and anxious I get. I hope everything goes well. While I sweep the kitchen I hear the door open and a lot of rustling. I set the broom down and head over to the entrance only to see Mingi with a female over his shoulder and she looked to be passed out. Slowly a pit in my stomach grows as I watch him carry her into the chapel like she weighed nothing . Seonghwa sees the look on my face and gently strokes my cheek “You don’t have to do this you know?” I shake my head and I say “No, I’ve got this.” and I walk over to the chapel and see her lying on the floor. She was beautiful, she also looked like she’s a very nice person. I shift my attention over to the guys, I noticed they were very serious, something all too familiar. It was just like when I first arrived here. The 8 vampires stand in front of the woman’s body patiently until a few minutes later that seemingly felt like hours until she slowly starts regaining consciousness. She slowly sits up and looks up at them and screams, a blood curdling scream that jolted me back into reality. The woman says  “Where am I?!” Hongjoong walks over to her and kneels in front of her and says “Don’t worry about it, just be a good girl okay?” she begins to uncontrollably cry and panic causing Hongjoong to smirk and extend his hand in my direction “Miss y/n, could you be a dear and please help me calm her down?” I feel so pressured to do everything correctly because while I walk over to that woman I feel everyone’s eyes on me, it was honestly kind of embarrassing. I gently grab her shoulder and kneel down next to her. “Hey, it’ll be okay. Take deep breaths.” I’m so sorry… She nods while teary eyed trying to calm herself down until eventually she quiets down. Hongjoong smirks “Thank you Miss y/n. Now, do you mind cleaning her up? She’s quite dirty from transit…” Hongjoong glances at Mingi only to have him shrug in response. While I help the woman up Hongjoong continues “Yeosang, be a dear and help out Miss y/n we don’t want our guest to try and pull a fast one on us.” He turns to look at the woman with an evil grin plastered on his face. The woman seemingly hides behind me clutching onto my arm tightly.

Yeosang then walks behind me and the woman. While heading up the stairs the woman whispers “Do you know where we are?” I glance over at her and shake my head “Honestly I don’t know. I haven’t been here very long either." The girl glances at Yeosang who shoots her a scary gaze causing her to look forward and quiet down.

Once we arrive to the bathroom I look over to Yeosang “Master, do you mind waiting outside? If there’s any trouble I’ll call you.” he nods understandably but still keeps a stone face and I close the door behind me, the girl then sits down next to the bathtub then I begin to run a bath for her “So, what’s your name?” She looks over at me and says “Sumi” Wow, she's so pretty and she has a pretty name.. “That’s a petty name, I'm y/n.” I touch the water then I look over at Sumi “Your bath is ready” she shyly looks away then I turn away covering my eyes “Don’t worry I won’t look, I do have to stay in here though.” I hear rustling then a few moments later I hear a small splash. I sit next to the bathtub while Sumi begins to wash her long black hair then she quietly asks “How long have you been here? Aren’t you scared of them?” I grab the towel next to the bathtub “Well I’ve been here for about 2 weeks, and honestly I am a bit scared except I just do everything they tell me to do. I try my best to make them happy and in return they’ll be nice.” she looks at me with a shocked expression then says “Have you tried to escape?” I shake my head and I look down at the cat crest on the apron on my dress “Hm, no but I did plead with them to let me leave but it’s no use they won’t let me and in all honesty I just don’t want to anger them.” Sumi reaches over, grabs my hand and says in a very quiet voice “Let’s escape together, they already trust you enough so maybe we can figure out a way to escape." I shake my head “I’m so sorry Sumi but I can’t leave even if I wanted to.”  Her eyes slightly widen then she looks at me in disbelief “What do you mean? Didn’t you say you’re scared of them? Now is your chance to escape… We can do this together.” I lean over and I quietly say “ I’m sorry Sumi but I really don’t want to be on their bad side you really don’t know what they’re capable of doing so i’m going to do what they say and maybe hopefully they let me go one day.” I get up and open the towel in my hands “Alright let's get you ready for bed now” I hand the towel to Sumi and while she waits to dry off she brushes her hair and eventually she changes into a night gown I've randomly picked for her. When we step outside, we see Yeosang patiently waiting for us. Once we escort her to the room with the sigil on the door and the floor. She gets into bed and I bring her a tea so she could relax and fall asleep faster. Before taking a sip from her tea Sumi looks over at me and says "Is this poisoned?" I shake my head "Oh no, it's not I promise. I just thought I'd bring you something to help calm your nerves." She looks down at her tea for a bit she then she looks back at me and says "Please don’t leave me here all alone, those guys really scare me.” I sit on the chair next to the bed “Don’t worry I’ll stay here until you fall asleep I won’t go anywhere I promise.”

She sets the teacup on the night stand and shifts her gaze to me “Why are you so stuck on being here? What do you even get from it?” I look down and shrug “I don’t know. At first I hated it here but if I’m being honest I still kind of like it.” Sumi scrunches her nose looking at me like I just said the dumbest thing ever “Why?” I stare at the sigil below the bed and over at the black cat stitching on my apron “I’ve made friends. Unconventional ones but I made them, which makes me feel less lonely than I did when I was living with my family.” Sumi sighs and leans back resting her head on the white headboard behind her with her arms crossed across her chest. “Since when do friends kidnap you and don’t let you go home though..” She’s right.. It doesn’t sound right. The least they should do as friends is let me briefly see my family. After a few seconds of me not saying anything Sumi reaches for my hand and tightly squeezes it “Think about it, we’ll escape together. They can’t do anything to you because you’re their friend. They wouldn’t think of hurting you right?” Mingi didn’t hesitate almost killing me though, what if some of them do feel that same way he does towards me but they’re just really great actors. What if they’re waiting for the right time to kill me? “I mean, I guess you are right. If they cared they’d trust me enough to let me go” A smile paints Sumi’s lips and she pulls my hands towards her causing me to sit at the edge of the bed and her inching close to me. “So are you going to do it?” I look at the ground and sit there silently fo a few seconds until I finally speak “Go to sleep, they sleep in the afternoon then we’ll talk about it.” Sumi smiles and gives me a hug “I promise we’ll escape and we will both go back home.” A huge knot grows in my throat and my eyes begin to sting. I hum in response and blink back my tears. They told me not to get close, but here I am…

Eventually when she falls asleep and I exit the room then Yeosang locks the door behind me  “You can go to Seonghwa’s room now Miss y/n the sacrifice will begin at 3:33 which is in about 30 minutes so I can give you a sleeping potion I made the other day in the lab so you sleep right through it.” I hesitantly nod “S-Sure where is it?” he then pulls out a vial from his pocket with light purple liquid in it and hands it over to me “First, get ready for bed then take this it’ll knock you out in about 1 minute while it makes its way through your bloodstream” I nod then I walk into Seonghwa’s room. I look down at the vial of purple liquid in my hand. Should I take it? I should, but I don’t think I can but if I don’t I know i’ll regret it. I change into my night gown then I get ready for bed eventually I lay in bed then I look at the vial. “I need to know what happens to Sumi.” The door suddenly opens and it’s Seonghwa, he walks over to me and smiles “Did you take the medicine Yeosang gave you to sleep my love?” Immediately out of instinct I nod he smiles and gently presses his lips on my forehead. “I’ll see you in the morning princess get some rest, I love you.” My cheeks flush and I nod “I love you too.” he keeps his warm smile then exits and closes the door behind him. I put out the candles and I lay down in complete darkness. If it gets unbearable i’ll take the medicine. I lay there for a few minutes waiting for something to happen then I get startled by a scream and immediately I get up and I slowly open the door and I look over to the room where Sumi is in but I couldn’t see anything. Sumi then screams again but this time she says  “y/n! Please help me! You said you’d never leave me!!” My stomach drops and a heavy knot forms in my throat that I gasp and I cover my mouth, my eyes slowly get blurred by the tears. I’m so sorry Sumi, you didn’t deserve this. This is all my fault I’m so sorry.. At this point I hear someone faintly speaking but I couldn’t hear exactly what they were saying. Sumi begins to violently cough and choke on presumably her own blood and I begin to silently cry trying not give myself away. Eventually it grows silent and I slowly close the door and I lay down in bed. While I look up at the ceiling I clutch onto the vial then I take the medicine. For the next minute I lay there crying until I was was too tired to cry. 

The next morning I wake up and notice Seonghwa sitting next to me reading a book. He notices I’m awake and puts down his book. I look up at him then I bury my face in his chest, everything that happened last night comes pouring back in an instant. Sumi’s screams echoed in my mind. I try to stop my tears by shutting my eyes “Hey, princess you’re up what’s wrong are you okay?” I manage to get a hold of myself then I pull back slightly teary eyed he then gently strokes my cheek while he looks deeply into my eyes “What’s wrong my love?” I shake my head and I look down “It’s nothing. It’s just- I'm just a bit homesick and I miss my mom that’s all.” I sit up next to him “I’m so sorry, I wish I could let you see your family but I can’t. You’ll be in more danger if you go back now that you’ve talked and seen us.”

He rests his forehead on my shoulder for a second then looks back over at me “Besides you’re safer here than you are back home, I saw the crime rates there and it’s pretty dangerous.” I grab Seonghwa’s cold hands and I gently hold them “I’m already used to it though, I grew up with having to protect myself so I’ll be okay. Can you at least let me tell my mom I’m okay? She must be worried sick, and probably thinks I’m dead.”  A hesitant expression grows on his face “I don’t know about that my love.” I’ll do this for Sumi, she’s right. I deserve to see my family at least once. I sit on his lap and wrap my arms around his neck while I nestle in his neck. “Please? You said you love me…” One of his hands slither to hold my waist and the other one moves to my thigh gently squeezing it, his breathing becoming a bit shallow. I gently kiss his neck while I run my hand down his chest “It can just be the two of us, and you can just tell my parents you’re going to be my husband. You know? To make it more official.” He slowly runs his hand through my figure and pulls me in for a kiss “Well…If that’s the case then it wouldn't hurt to go see them for a little bit, but we can’t stay there for long I don’t want Draven to see you with us..” I gasp and give him a doe eyed look then I pull him into a hug. “Thank you so much! I love you so much I promise this will be the only time I ever ask for anything!” He chuckles and pushes a strand of hair behind my ear “I love you too my love, get ready I’ll wait outside okay?” I nod and hurriedly climb off the bed. It’s scary how Seonghwa is acting like nothing happened last night. Like he didn’t just kill a whole human. Then again, their will to live was probably stronger than empathy, which is scary to think as a vampire being tied down to that monster. I hate to think that if I was put into that position I would shamelessly probably do the same thing.. it most definitely doesn't make it okay though no matter how kind they've been. It's scary to think that if they have to, they will get rid of me whether they're attached or not.

 I walk over to the dresser and see the drawer stocked with clothes. After changing clothes When I head over downstairs and see Seonghwa waiting for me by the entrance I see him looking at me with a smile on his face. “You’re wearing the clothes I bought for you.” I smile and lace my hand with his “Of course why wouldn’t I? “ Seonghwa reaches over and grabs his long black trench coat jacket and puts it on. We leave the house and as soon as I step outside the chilly autumn breeze grazes through my skin and for the very first time I notice this is the first time I’ve walked through the front door since I got here. It turns out we’re in the middle of nowhere in like a forest so it makes sense as to why no one even knows about this house. Seonghwa opens the door to a really gorgeous looking black luxury car, presumably Seonghwa’s or one of the guys who knows but it looks really expensive. He looks over at me and covers my eyes “Close them, and don’t open them until I tell you okay?” I put my hands over my eyes “Wait why?” Seonghwa reaches over and gently pats my thigh “Just trust me.” Then I feel the car very rapidly increasing speed until for a split second I don’t feel like the car is moving at all then after a few seconds of feeling nothing the car goes back to driving over the road. “Okay, you can open your eyes now” He gently pats my thigh and I open my eyes, immediately I look behind us and notice it was just forest. I think I just went through a portal. Was that a portal? The more he drove down the road the more I began to recognize the roads and buildings. Until eventually I guide him to my house. We get out of the car and I run towards the door while Seonghwa calmly walks behind me. I run up the steps and knock on the door, a few seconds later my mom opens the door, gasps and I wave at her “Hey mom.” For a few seconds she looks at me like she's seen a ghost and she tightly pulls me into a hug. “y/n! Sweetheart, where have you been? We’ve been looking for you, we were beginning to assume the worst happened to you...” I shake my head "I'm fine mom, I just wanted to come and let you guys know I'm fine and relieve you from that worry." My mom looks behind her as If she was looking for someone and says "Hold that thought-"

She lets both of us in and has us sit in the living room and says “I’ll go call your dad and your brothers, they’re outside in the backyard I just want us to comfortably talk..” While she leaves for a bit to get the rest of my family Seonghwa turns to me and asks “So are you the youngest in your family?” I shake my head “Actually, I���m the oldest.l.” He nods “Ah, I see. Must be hard being the eldest.” I chuckle “Ha, yeah it kind of is. Parents have very high expectations of me which is why my relationship with my father and mother is somewhat strained.”  Suddenly I hear both my little brothers run into the living room and I get up and hug them tightly “Hey Kiddos!” then I turn and see my dad entering the room looking at both and Seonghwa and I in shock. I walk over to my dad and wave “Hey dad, um I’m not dead.” My dad gives me a cold stare and says “Where did you run off to? If you wanted to move out you could have told us. You had your mom so worried sick she couldn’t even sleep.” I sigh then I look down at the floor and Seonghwa walks over to my dad and confidently extends his hand and says “Hello I’m Seonghwa, y/n’s husband.” My dad’s jaw drops while he shakes his hand and says “Are you serious? You never talked about dating anyone again. You rarely even left the house when you weren’t at work” I look over at Seonghwa and smile then I say “I met Seonghwa at the store I worked at dad.” My mom then grabs my hands and says “But you haven’t known him very long sweetheart how could you marry him a few months after meeting him?” I shake my head “Actually, I’ve known him for about 3 years, he was a regular at the store.”  My mom tilts her head in confusion “You just got out of a relationship a year and a half ago sweetie..”  Seonghwa gives my mom a warm smile “We started out as friends but after her breakup she was in bad shape and I kind of wanted to show her that not all men are bad. So, after we began dating we fell in love very deeply, and if I’m being honest I liked her way before we even started dating but out of respect for her relationship I decided not to make a move until she became single.” I nod and smile then my mom says “That’s very sweet of you, not many young men as respectful as you exist anymore sadly.” My mom’s eyes slightly narrow as she walks over to Seonghwa and examines his face a little closer “Sorry for changing the subject, I’ve just been meaning to ask this but how come there’s a wound on your cheek?” Seonghwa blinks, then gently touches the wound on his cheek and responds with a chuckle “Oh uh, her ex and I got into a fight last night..” I gulp and nervously look over at my parents “Ah yeah, it was bad. Kind of gave me secondhand embarrassment seeing him get what he deserved.” But it never happened… "Do you need some ointment for that sweetheart?" My mom gently tilts his head examining the wound "Oh no, I'm okay Mrs. y/ln I’m fine, y/n was kind enough to clean it for me this morning." Seonghwa gives my mom a sheepish smile causing my mom to smile back at him.” Well, you’re very handsome and it’d be a shame if it scars.”

My mom glances over at me gently grabbing my hand “So how come you disappeared without a word y/n? Did something happen?” This is so weird? She’s actually asking about my feelings, did me disappearing scare her that much? Why is she holding my hand? This is so unlike her. I look over at Seonghwa then back at my mom “Well, I wasn’t doing too well mentally so Seonghwa decided to take me on a trip and escape for a bit to gather my thoughts. It was on a whim actually, very last minute. He told me as soon as I closed the store that night.” 

My mom reaches over and holds both my hands “Please Sweetie don’t ever leave like that you really worried me. Please, at least next time let us know right away so we know you’re okay.” come visit us at least once a week.” I give my mom a soft smile and I look over at Seonghwa who had a guilty expression on his face. I then look back at my mom’s sad expression, her hair in a very messy bun with dark circles under her eyes. She really did lose sleep over me and I felt terrible for that. Judging from the way Seonghwa looked though I know he felt bad. I gently fix my mom’s messy hair and I say  “Actually that’s why I came here mom, I don’t know when I’ll be able to come and visit you guys since we’re planning on moving to Seonghwa’s home town. I just wanted to clear up any misunderstandings I probably created by disappearing on such short notice.” My mom looks down and sighs “You know, you being gone really made me think about how we weren’t being very good parents. ” My father silently stares at me while my mom avoids looking at me “Your father and I have always been hard on you, expecting so much from you constantly, and for that we’re so sorry.. We’re so sorry we caused you to become distant and keep so much from us..” I press my lips into a straight line and reach towards my mom “Mom, as long as you guys realize your mistakes it’s enough for me. I understand you wanted to raise me right, and of course I know I didn’t turn out the way you guys wanted me to but I hope you guys are still proud of me.” My mom pulls me into a hug “Sweetheart, I am proud of you. Your father and I are both proud of you, we just have some demons we haven’t yet been able to face even at our age.” Woah, why is she being so honest? Now I truly do think my “marriage” is what made her realize something.” I understand mom, which I why I feel like it’s best I leave so you can both process that and heal without me being your target. Time and distance cures things sometimes.” I pause feeling a knot in my throat for a few seconds then I continue “So I forgive you, for everything. Now it’s up to the both of you if you want to take the change or not, if not for me do it for my siblings. They need the safe and warm embrace of their parents.” My mom nods holding back tears, while gently cupping my face in her hands “We will try our hardest, not just for your siblings but for you as well. Even though we’re years too late.” My eyes begin to sting from the tears causing me to blink until the tears roll down my cheeks “It’s never too late mom, I just don’t want dad and you to die with regrets just how I don’t want to die resenting my parents. Regardless, I promise I’ll be in good hands.” My parents would freak out if they found out I don’t just live with one but 7 other guys, not to mention they’re all vampires who sacrifice humans to a scary Vampire demon named Draven.

After about an hour of talking to my parents and catching up I look at clock in the kitchen and realize the time. “I’m sorry mom It’s time for me to go.” She furrows her eyebrows “Why so early? You just got here?” I sigh “Well, it’s just that we leave tonight and I’ve got to get my bags ready.” Disappointed my mom hums and I feel my heart sink to my stomach. “Mom. Please take care, I’ll try calling you a few times a week okay?”  My mom kisses my forehead she reaches over at the counter and hands me a box filled with sweets she made and says “Here’s some cookies and other sweet things I made sweetie eat them well okay? I’ll be waiting for your call. I’m sorry you have to go in such a rush.” I hug her tightly holding back tears again then I gently kiss her cheek then my dad looks over towards Seonghwa and finally speaks after a while “Please take care of my daughter and treat her well. Me and her might not see eye to eye most of the time but she’s still my daughter and it would wreck us if anything happened to her.” Seonghwa nods and shakes my dad’s hand “Of course sir. I’d protect her with my life, she’s safe with me. Always.” My mom calls both my little brothers to come say goodbye and they tightly hug me “I have to go now, take care of mom okay?” They both nod and walk over to hide behind my mom. I walk towards the door and take one last look at my family “Bye mom, dad, kiddos. I’ll come back when I can okay?” I wave goodbye and walk towards the car with a huge knot in my throat then my eyes begin tearing up and as soon as I sit inside the car I begin to silently cry. Seonghwa gets in the car after waving goodbye and notices I'm crying, there was instant change of expression and he leans over to hug me “Hey, no don’t cry. It’s okay, this isn’t a goodbye you’ll see them one day. When we figure out what to do with the whole Draven situation we’ll come and see them as often as you want. I’m so sorry this is all my fault.” He kisses the top of my head while he gently strokes my hair. while I hold Seonghwa’s hand “No, you can’t help who you fall in love with. Besides I actually really like living with you and the guys, I don’t feel alone anymore. The only reason I’m crying is because of everything that’s happened I really expected to die at one point and all of that led to me wanting to at least make it clear to my family I’m not dead. It didn't help my parents telling me all that stuff made me really emotional.” Sadness and remorse clouded his features “I’m glad you were able to solve things with your family, even if it was because they genuinely did think you were dead which I really am sorry about. I’m sorry about the way we met and how we just kidnapped you like that. I’ve been meaning to apologize but out of pure fear of you somehow hating me I just keep silent.” Seonghwa wipes away my tears then I gently caress his hand with my thumb and smile “It wasn’t the best way to meet the love of your life but as crazy as it sounds I’m glad it happened because for once in my life a tragedy led to happiness and you’re my happiness Seonghwa.” He rests his forehead on mine and says in a quiet tone “I love you so much, your love is so pure.” I lean In and gently kiss his hand “I love you too, I’m glad I met you.”

Seonghwa looks into my eyes lovingly for a few seconds then snaps out of it and smiles “How about we head back home, I’m sure everyone is wondering where we are.” I nod and wipe the remaining tears from under my eyes. During one of the stop lights while I was looking out the window I see a strange ultra pale man with long black hair his eyes looked black and empty like an endless void and he seemed to be staring at me with a very serious and cold expression, not to mention he has painful looking scar over his left eye and a very interesting red jeweled necklace. I slowly and awkwardly look away and I look at the road in front of me. It was probably some weird guy trying to scare people. That’s so creepy. 

Eventually we make it home and as soon as I enter the house San runs in from another room and hugs me tightly “Miss y/n! Where did you go!? I was going to ask if you could make me a snack!” Wooyoung then runs into the room panting then says “San I said I’ll cook for you!! Oh, hi Seonghwa, hi Miss y/n I was wondering why I hadn’t seen either of you around.” Wooyoung walks over to us then I say “Oh yeah, we went to go visit my family because I didn’t want them thinking I was dead.”  Nonchalantly Wooyoung nods and says “Oh yeah, we kidnapped you I almost forgot about that.”  Seonghwa glares at Wooyoung then he nervously laughs and says “Yeah, we’re so sorry about that.” I shake my head “No worries, but enough of that we can talk about it later because guess what I brought you guys from my mom’s house!?” Both shrug while Seonghwa looks at us admiringly and San looks at the box says “What is it?” I open the pastel pink box with cookies and other sweets and smile “Some sweet things my mom made, I thought you guys would have loved to taste it since you guys liked my cookies and sweets so much. So I think you guys will love my mom’s a lot more because personally I think my mom’s are better.”  San gasps “Oh! We should! Seonghwa I’m stealing Miss y/n for a little bit we’re going to have a snack!” he links his arm with mine then begins to walk away then Seonghwa says “Don’t worry about having to do anything today my love have fun. San, don’t eat them all in one sitting they’re supposed to last us a few days.” While we walk away San chuckles and says “Okay dad” I turn and smile “I’ll have fun no worries! I’ll bring you blood earl grey tea with a snack later okay?” he nods and smiles then Wooyoung looks over at Seonghwa then over at San and I and catches up to us “Wait I wanna have some too!!” We walk into the kitchen and it looked as if Wooyoung began to work on something. I walk over to the stove then I look at Wooyoung and I give him a smirk “Aww, so you were actually starting to cook for San.” He nods then looks over at San slightly irritated “Yeah, I was going to surprise him but as soon as he heard the door open I heard him running towards the door like a crazy person.”  I look down at the sweets box and look back up at Wooyoung and smile “Do you wanna finish that then we can have this as a snack?” He nods and says “I was planning on cooking a dish my mom always cooked for me back when I was alive.” 

I set down the box on the table and I sit down while Wooyoung washes his hands “Ohh wow that sounds nice we can’t wait to taste it right San?” San nods giving me a dimpled smile “I’m looking forward to it too since Wooyoung always told me his mom’s cooking was the best.” San sits on the chair across from me while Wooyoung cooks then I fold my hands across my lap then San says “How did it go visiting your mom? Did she freak out?” I raise an eyebrow and chuckle “Uh, yeah she freaked out she thought I was dead.” He presses his lips together then says “Well of course but what I meant is did she notice Seonghwa was a vampire?” I shake my head and shrug “I actually don’t know, she never said anything but I’m sure she probably thought his eye color was weird I noticed she kept looking at his eyes alot she also asked abut the scar on his cheek” Wooyoung chuckles “Well I mean you’re supposed to look at people in the eye when you talk to them Miss y/n. I’ve noticed you don’t really do that you usually look away or look behind us when you talk to people.” I put my head down on the table to hide my flushed face “Do I really make it that noticeable?” San reaches over to me and pats my head and says “You do, it’s kind of endearing though. It shows how shy you are although I’ll give you credit for occasionally making eye contact.” While stirring something on the stove Wooyoung says “ My personal favorite is when you don’t look at our faces at all.” I lift my head and scrunch my nose “Well, I mean can you blame me?! You guys are gorgeous, like seriously it’s kind of intimidating. It’s almost inhuman how beautiful you guys are.” I put both my elbows on the table and I put my chin on my hands and I gaze out the window while a smile slowly grows on my lips “Especially Seonghwa he’s the definition of perfect.” San’s mouth hangs open then covers his mouth then Wooyoung says “I mean I knew I was handsome but I didn’t know we all were.” I clear my throat and I smooth down my skirt then San says “You really think we’re beautiful? Don't we scare you?” I look up for a few seconds while I think then I say “I mean yes, but that doesn’t take away from your beauty. My mom once told me when I was a little kid that vampires lure in a lot of their victims with their beauty. So she definitely wasn’t wrong about vampires being so beautiful.” San smiles and holds both my hands “You’re pretty cute yourself Miss y/n, I understand now why Seonghwa is so in love with you and waited hundreds of years just to be with you.” Wooyoung grabs a small piece of carrot and throws it at San causing both of us to flinch “San stop it, you’re being weird again” San looks over at Wooyoung slightly irritated and says “I was just complimenting her I wasn’t being weird” Wooyoung then turns and looks at San “What do you think Seonghwa would say?” San shrugs then looks over to me and smiles “I’m sure he knows Miss y/n is a very cute human so I don’t think he’ll flip out over a compliment.” Wooyoung leaves the pot to boil and sits next to San and says “What else did you see when you went to your parents’ house.” 

I tap my index finger to my chin then I say “Well, my dad was mad at me when he first saw me because I disappeared, I saw my little brothers, and also this is random but I saw a really pale guy with long black hair, black eyes and a huge scar on his left eye. He was staring at me with this really serious and scary facial expression but I think he was just trying to freak me out though.” San and Wooyoung’s eyes almost pop out of their skull then Wooyoung says in a very concerned tone “What was he wearing?” I shrug “Hm, he was wearing all black. I didn’t really pay much attention but he wasn’t badly dressed. I do remember his pitch black eyes, his scar and this really interesting blood red jeweled necklace because it looked a bit dated but those three are what stick out alot why? Do you guys know him?” San and Wooyoung both look at each other in complete horror then San says “We have to go tell Seonghwa and Hongjoong, this isn’t good. He knows.” My heart begins to race and my stomach drops then I get up from my seat not being able to sit still “Wh- What do you mean? Are you talking about Draven?” They both nod then they get up and Wooyoung turns the stove off and says “Stay with Miss y/n, I’ll go talk to them.” San nods and before I’m able to go back to my seat  I begin to shake to the point where I could barely stand up San then helps me sit down he then kneels in front of me holding my hands and says in a low comforting voice “We promise we’re going to do anything in our power to protect you.” My lip trembles and my eyes well up with tears then San says “Don’t cry. You might not know this but you’re far more powerful than you lead on, your bloodline will protect you too if anything happens to us.” I cover my mouth trying to keep myself from crying loudly. I don’t want to lose Seonghwa, I love him so much. I also don’t want to lose my new friends either. I don’t want anyone to suffer because of me. Seonghwa and all the guys including Mingi walk into the kitchen with Seonghwa immediately walking over to me taking me in his arms “Please don’t cry, you’re breaking my heart. It’s okay, remember I told you and your parents I’d protect you with my life and that’s what I’m going to do.” I hug him back tightly and bury my face in his chest while the other guys are unable to do anything but silently watch.

“I don’t want to lose you, I can’t lose you. I also can’t lose my friends, and that includes Mingi and Yunho even if they hate me. I can’t lose anyone of you guys.” He gently strokes my hair I then notice from the corner of my eye Mingi’s gaze going from cold to a soft concerned gaze. Yunho then looks over at Mingi then back at me, Seonghwa then says in a low tone “Everything will be okay.” He’s lying, he's trying to convince himself everything will be okay but I have a feeling he’s lying.. I pull back and he gently wipes my tears away “I’m going to be a sorceress like Ursula. I don’t know anything about being a witch but i’m not going to sit here and do nothing and watch you guys get punished because of me.” Yeosang looks over at the guys “I’ll help her. I’ve studied witches before so I have a few books on them.” I look over and see Yeosang give me a shy smile I then say in a barely audible tone “Thank you so much.” Hongjoong then says in a skeptical tone “So you saw Draven today? Why didn’t you tell Seonghwa?” I shrug while stippling my fingers “I honestly didn’t know that’s what he looked like, I genuinely thought it was just some weirdo on the street trying to mess with me so I brushed it off.” Seonghwa looks over at Hongjoong and says “It’s not her fault. It was mine for not telling her anything, for trying to pretend like she didn’t need to know. I’m sorry.”  San gently pats Seonghwa’s back and says “You wanted to protect her it’s okay. Besides, she’s not totally clueless. Wooyoung, Jongho and I have been telling her things about the supernatural world and the effect her blood will have on a vampire if they drink it” Jongho then chimes in.” We also kinda told her about our pact with Draven. Don’t get mad, we knew something like this was going to happen so that’s why we just went ahead and gave her a heads up.” Hongjoong stands there for a few seconds glaring at the boys then sighs “I would have been really upset but I mean you guys did the right thing so there’s not much I can do there, thank you for not leaving her in the dark about things.” He then turns to look at me and says “Miss y/n, I’d like to apologize on behalf of all of us for bringing you into this mess. I’m sure you regret meeting all of us.” I shake my head “Like I told Seonghwa earlier, I believe all of this was meant to happen. Somehow though I was able to find the beauty behind the madness, because of you guys I no longer feel alone and sad. The longer I’m here the more at home I feel, you guys are my destiny.” Yunho then says in a somber tone “Aren’t you scared knowing that because of us you’ll be a blood bank for Draven until you die?”

Evreyone looks at Yunho with a very surprised look on their faces then he continues “You know that’s the reality right Miss y/n? If he takes you that'll be the ugly reality you'll have to live. None of us wanted you to see it but you made it so hard because you kept asking too many questions.” I bite the inside of my lip “Well, of course I’m scared but fear isn’t going to stop me from stopping Draven, especially not when the love of my life and my friends are at stake. The reason I was asking so many questions is because of the way all of you made things sound, I had to find out for myself if there was a way I could help.” Yunho quietly nods in understanding and looks down “I honestly don’t know what we ever did to deserve you Miss y/n.” Did he just- Wooyoung looks over at Hongjoong and says “So, what do we do now? Do we summon Draven?” Hongjoong shakes his head while he massages the side of his temple “No, that’s the last thing we wanna do. We’ll have to wait until he appears himself, it’ll buy us alot of time.” I don’t know why but I keep hearing that phrase. Buying time. Seonghwa looks over at the stove and says “You didn’t get to eat did you?” I shake my head and he smiles “You should eat so that cute brain of yours works properly when you study.” He looks over at Yeosang and says “Do you mind staying with Miss y/n for a bit? Maybe you could start teaching her about her bloodline I’ll catch you up afterwards” He nods and evreyone walks out of the kitchen leaving me with Yeosang. He walks over to me and sits down in the chair in front of me while I grab some of the food Wooyoung prepared I serve Yeosang his favorite, just pure blood. I set it in front of him while I also set my plate down he then breaks the silence “It’s brave of you to try and help us.” I carefully pour tea into my cup “Of course, I’d do anything at this point for my friends but most importantly the love of my life.” Yeosang traces his index finger along the rim of the glass “That’s very sweet of you and a very pure intention that I hope works in your favor.” I shove a spoonful of food in my mouth he then pulls his finger away from the glass and clears his throat “So about your relative Sorceress Ursula, not only was she a well known pyromancer..” The corners of my eyes crinkle “What is that? I mean I’ve heard of them but I don;t really know what they do besides control fire..” A small smirk appears on his angelic features “Well, a pyromancer is a sorcerer who can manipulate and conjure up fire at will..” I take a sip of my tea then I say “Oh wow Ursula was pretty strong I’m sure it took her years.” Yeosang nods and says “Yeah she was but the more you study and practice I’m sure you’ll get the hang of it, at least the basics in a few months.” Can I really do this? My only hope is that my determination is enough to help me.I stare at the table then I lift up my gaze and I say “I have a bad feeling I won’t have a few months.” Yeosang gives me a concerned look “Don’t say that, if only Seonghwa got a good look at the guy maybe we would know for sure if it was actually him but let’s just hope it wasn’t him. We’re probably just freaking over nothing.” 

After I finish eating Yeosang takes me to his work room located in the chapel. He opens the wooden door to reveal a dimly lit room with beakers and flasks each containing different substances and along the walls were bookshelves filled with many different kinds of books. It was like a small time capsule of a Victorian era laboratory. I quietly gasp and smile “Oh my gosh Yeosang, you have so many books!” he chuckles and gently massages his neck slightly embarrassed “I guess I do, thing is that’s not even half of them. A Lot of the books in the whole house are mine the other ones are either Seonghwa or Hongjoong’s” I walk over to a bookshelf and immediately spot Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes “Oh my gosh, can I borrow this? Is this the original cover?” He nods “It is, I remember when it first came out it’s nice to see you have a really great taste in books and of course, I have the whole series so whenever you want to borrow a book just let me know.” I smile and hug the book then Yeosang puts on his glasses and inspects carefully at the bookshelves eventually pulling out a few books “I don’t wanna overwhelm you with reading but I feel like these 4 books have very good information on not just beginner spells but also a little more intermediate. I also  gave you one specific book for necromancy if you want to dip your toes into that. I will say necromancry is powerful, but I trust you will use it correctly.” He puts the 4 thick books in my arms and I glance at him with concern “What if I accidentally hurt you guys..” Yeosang gently puts his hand on my shoulder “It won’t happen, I know so. Trust yourself.” I nod then Yeosang pulls a chair and clears a small space on the table and smiles “You can sit here and read while I work on a few things. If you have a question you can just ask.” I sit down and open the first book and I begin to read, a few hours pass until I started dozing off. I should really go freshen up, I’m falling asleep and this isn’t the time to be falling asleep no matter how boring these books are. “Hey Yeosang, I’ll be right back I have to use the bathroom.” He nods and without looking up from his notes says “Okay, I’ll be here. Hurry back.”

Once I finish I wash my hands and walk outside. I walk past Mingi’s room and I hear the door open and immediately I come to a halt, I slowly turn around and see Mingi standing in the middle of the hallway. I gasp and I run towards the stairs until I feel him grab my arm and he says in a sincere but very soft tone “I’m not going to hurt you, I promise.” Stay on guard y/n. I gently pull my hand away from Mingi’s grip and I step back a bit “Do you need something Master Mingi?” I say in a serious tone he nods then says in a soft voice almost like he’s whispering “I’m not supposed to be anywhere near you without anyone else here with me but after hearing you call me a friend I honestly felt terrible for what I did to you. I let the prejudice between vampires and witches get in the way of seeing what a great caring person you are and for that I’m sorry.” I glance over at Mingi and his face was painted with remorse, I quietly sigh and cross my arms in front of my chest “Master Mingi, you tried to kill me. I can’t just trust you that easily after something like that that’s not how it works.” He runs his hands through his hair and nods “Yeah I know, I just wanted to put it out there that I don’t hate you anymore especially after seeing how much you genuinely mean to everyone else here especially Seonghwa.” I stare at the ground for a few seconds then he reaches over to touch my shoulder and out of fear I slightly jump up and he pulls his hand back “I’m so sorry.”  I fidget with my fingers then I look up at him “I forgive you Master Mingi. I understand your urges are hard to control at times especially being around humans but I think It was also my fault too for making it even harder for you to control yourself by going into that room even after Seonghwa told me not to and making you upset so for that I’m so sorry.” Mingi looks in to the distance as if he was trying to process my apology then he says “It’s okay, it’s just the reason Seonghwa told you not to go in there is because there are artifacts in that room that if touched by a human the power surging through those items could kill you.” Wow, but what are they used? Sacrifices? “Hm, like what?”

Mingi looks around making sure no one is around and steps closer towards me “Well, one of them is the Shard of Hades, it is said to be made of the Hades’ own weapon the bident. It grants you huge amounts of power and is able to control masses. Which is why anytime a human touches it they die, due to the dark energy emanating from it. The only beings to ever be able to wield this weapon is immortals like gods, demons, or vampires which is why it’s dangerous. One huge drawback with immortals wielding it is that if their willpower is not strong enough the dark energy consumes them thus sucking the immortality out of them.” I raise my eyebrow “Why is this in your possession if it’s so dangerous?” Mingi shrugs “It belonged to our creator, we honestly don’t know how he got a hold of it. He left it behind after he died so we decided to keep it away from Draven because one thing for sure is that he would definitely take advantage of its powers.” I narrow my eyes slightly “Hm okay then how come the door wasn’t locked?” He presses his lips into a straight line “It was…Just maybe not for humans. The sigil on the door, in the room and under your bed are a protection sigil that way we’d know if anything unhuman has entered our home. Unfortunately we underestimated you, usually people don’t get ballsy enough to go down there after we tell them not to which is our mistake.” I’m guessing even vampires themselves majorly fuck up. “I mean you can’t expect humans to listen and submit to everything you say even if their lives are in danger..” He looks over his shoulder again and says “I mean to be fair we never expected it because this is the very first time a human has stayed here this long, they’re usually either dinner or a sacrifice.” I nervously laugh then Mingi gasps and shakes his head “Oh no, you’re not either of those don’t worry.” MIngi looks away then looks at the ground.

“y/n? Can I tell you something and please don’t take this the wrong way” I slightly raise my eyebrows and I say “What is it Master Mingi?” He awkwardly shoves his hands in the pockets of his pants and says in a slight embarrassed tone “So, Yunho told me your cooking is really good and I was wondering if maybe one day if you’re comfortable enough with me I could maybe try it?” I never thought I’d see the day where Master Mingi would confess him wanting to try my cooking, that’s so cute. “Oh you mean like have dinner with Masters San, Wooyoung, Jongho and me?” He nods while looking away clearly embarrassed “Of course, you can join us tomorrow if you’d like.” I nod and for a few seconds we stand there with Mingi suddenly getting really quiet then I hear Yeosang call out my name. Mingi looks at me with eyes pleading me not to tell anyone that we’ve talked. He puts his index finger in front of his lips and quickly goes back into his room. A few seconds later Yeosang walks up the stairs and sees me walking down the hallway and says “I’m sorry I got worried. You were gone for quite a while is everything okay?” I nod “Yeah, everything is okay my mind was just wandering and I kind of lost track of time.” I begin walking down the stairs with Yeosang walking next to me, eventually we get back to his science room and I go back to studying for a few more hours while Yeosang is busy observing a mixture in a beaker bubbling over a burner and tending to other stuff in his lab. Suddenly there’s a knock at the door and Yeosang automatically says “Come in.” too focused reading I feel someone kiss the top of my head and I look up and see it’s Seonghwa he then says “Sorry it took long my love me and Hongjoong just got caught up talking that we lost track of time. ”

He turns and looks at Yeosang and says “Hey, Hongjoong wants to see you he’s gonna go over what we talked about.” Yeosang turns off the burner and continues writing stuff down “Okay, i’ll be there in a few I just need to finish writing this observation.” I close the book I was reading then I say “I’ll just go back to our room and study” Seonghwa tilts his head slightly “How about so you’re not by all yourself you can stay with me in my work room?” I smile then I say “Anything to have an excuse to hang out with you.” He chuckles then helps me with my books then I before I walk out the door I tap Yeosang’s shoulder and I say “Thank you for the books, I’ll return them to you when I’m done” He smiles shyly and says “Of course anytime also please take your time and let me know if you need help with something” I nod then I walk over to Seonghwa and we head over to his work room. As soon as I enter I notice his work room has no windows, his work space is also very neat and tidy and like Yeosang his work space was a small time capsule, now I understand why they don’t really leave their workspaces that often. I’m sure it reminds them of when they were alive. I look over at Seonghwa and quietly giggle “Wow, you’re very neat and tidy and this looks like a workspace of a 17th century poet it’s really beautiful.” He nods and sets down my books onto his desk and says “I’m glad you like it, a lot of the things in here are things I used to own when I was a human.” He gently touches a small wooden music box and lifts up his gaze to look back at me and continues “Like this music box, it doesn’t work anymore but having it here with me is comforting.” I softly smile while I take a closer look at it without touching it. “I like it, I think it’s cute how much you treasure this. It's like a reminder that you were once human and your life prior to becoming a vampire.” he nods and sits down on his slightly worn leather chair and says “Yes, it is a much needed reminder and if I’m honest, when you turn into this you tend to forget your human qualities and tend to become very inhuman. Not just physically but in the way you think too, you lose yourself…”

I sit down in the chair in front of his desk and I carefully watch him “I lost myself and turned into a monster, that in the moment I couldn’t tell until I realized it was you we were going to sacrifice. The love of my life, my soul mate. You brought me back to my senses.” I smile and reach for his hand “I’m so proud of you for realizing your mistake, I'm sure those urges are very hard to handle and it’s very easy to lose yourself and give in to that animalistic behavior.” Somewhat ashamed he silently nods and I sit there gently rubbing my thumb on the top of his hand. “All those sacrifices don’t define you. Part of me believes you did it because you had to not because you wanted to.” He reaches over and strokes my cheek without breaking eye contact, he then lets out a small sigh and says “Of course I had no other choice, none of us did. Draven and his older brother saved all of us from the brink of death and working for him was a way to repay him for keeping us alive.” Everything is beginning to make sense as to why they’re tied down to this evil thing, not only do they have a contract with him but he’s also probably one of the reasons they’re not dead. Me being here is only going to make things worse for them, I can’t let them take the fall because of me. If they’re going to live forever they should be able to live a life they enjoy not live a life as henchmen for a demon. “So in a way he’s keeping all of you to work for him against your will.”

Seonghwa nods and sits back on his chair falling completely silent once again until I speak “Now I see the loyalty for this man isn’t because you admire him, it’s out of fear…” I look at one of the books from the corner of my eye and look back at Seonghwa’s sullen expression. The only way to truly make Seonghwa happy is to defeat this demon. I force a smile and say “I’ll work hard to protect you, I won’t let you suffer.” Seonghwa’s face lights up a little bit and gestures me to give him a hug. I get up and walk behind his desk and I lean over and hug him while I rest my head on his shoulder “Can I ask you ask a question?” He hums slightly nodding his head “What was your life as a human?” He chews the inside of his cheek completely avoiding eye contact with me so I hesitantly grab his hand again “We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” He shakes his head “No, it’s just kind of a hard thing to look back on but it’s also something you need to know about me before you make your choice whether you want to stay with me or not.” I raise my eyebrow slightly surprised. He clears his throat and adjusts in his chair and gently pulls me over so that I sit on his desk facing him “So, when I was human it was my father, mother, my older sister and I. Years before I was born my great grandfather was a former warrior for our village who eventually turned into a thief, he was later killed for his actions after he robbed a noble after he almost killed him. Unfortunately, my family suffered the consequences for my grandfather’s actions and my whole family was ostracized from the village and we were treated like outcasts. That led to our family to become very poor and unable to afford food and other important necessities a lot of the time. So as I grew up I resented not only my grandfather but the people of our village for blaming us who had done nothing. One day when my older sister got severely ill I had no choice but to steal the medicine she needed to get better. The bad part is that from that day forward it was a habit that soon turned into something I enjoyed, I enjoyed seeing those people responsible for my family’s ostracization suffer even if it was at my expense. I slowly became a well known delinquent in the village, constantly getting into fights and trouble to the point where my mother eventually stopped reacting to my injuries from how frequent it was.“ I would have never guessed Seonghwa being this type of person prior to becoming a vampire. I genuinely thought he probably came from a rich family or was a royal himself. The way he carries himself is so proper and prince like, nothing like the delinquent he says he was. “Wow, that’s- I’m so sorry you went through this, you spent your human life on survival mode.” He meets my eyes and says “I’m sorry I was not the person you probably thought I was. In a way I deceived you, I was a horrible person and I did many things I wish I could take back. You have no idea how much I hate myself, I could have become better but I didn’t. I became what my village expected of me.” I pull his hands a little closer to me resting them on my lap “Look, I’m not going to sit here and say what you did was okay because it wasn’t. The good thing is that if you recognize your mistake, you’re headed in the right direction. You feeling remorse for your actions means that you do have a heart.” He furrows his eyebrows and I continue “No one is perfect whether they are living or undead” He sighs and defeatedly looks away from me “I know. I just want to be perfect for you.” I smile and pull him into my arms, his head resting on my chest “I know you do, but you don’t have to. I’m happy the way you are. Flaws and everything, just how you love me for me.” He pulls me a little closer to him while I gently stroke his sliver hair, we stay quiet for a few minutes enjoying being in each other’s arms until Seonghwa eventually pulls back “I almost forgot to tell you how I met our creator Sir Jongkook.” I give him a small smile “Go ahead, I'm listening.”

Seonghwa laces his fingers with mine and looks up at me from his seat “Well, Sir Jongkook and Draven were explorers at the time and they happened to stay at our village since our village was well known for its nightlife. It just so happened he was on his way to meet up with Draven at a tavern near the nightlife district and that’s when he runs into me getting the living daylights beat out of me after I foolishly picked a fight with the mayor’s son, I eventually became outnumbered. So, I don’t remember this part as I was passed out by then but Sir Jongkook fended them off, when he got closer to my body to check up on me and he realized how severe the beating was. He decided to feed me his blood because I was very close to dying and he felt horrible and didn’t want to just leave me there so he figured he’d take me in his care and give me a new life, one where I wasn’t so vulnerable and troublesome.” I see why they’re so fond of this man, he was very empathetic for a vampire. I can only imagine how happy he made them in order them to admire them so much they still keep a painting of him. “So I’m guessing your creator was one of those rare vampires who aren’t evil?” He nods “Yes, he was a very good man. I learned a lot from him, the rest are very fond of him too. He was there when we needed him the most.” I hold his face in my hands gently stroking around the wound on his cheek “I promise we’ll bring your creator back home, so he can finally rest in peace.” He pushes back a strand of hair behind my ear and rests his forehead on mine “ I love how empathetic you are towards our creator despite never meeting him, you would have loved him..”  Great aunt Ursula please, if you can hear me please help me I’m begging you. I know I just found out about you not long ago but I need help awakening my powers. I need to redeem myself, for not only letting a person die but I need to find a way to get rid of Draven one way or another to end this.

☽ ──── ༺𖤐༻ ──── ☾

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[changingplumbob]

Knightstone Household: Chapter 8, Part 3

I'm back and so is my alien family! Adam tries to teach Silas how to potty, Suzanna finishes her new garden and family day (because not everyone has mothers or fathers in my save, just like the real world) comes with ups and downs.

Nicknames Suzanna is Mummy or Starlight Adam is Pops or My Heart Silas is Starshine Pollock is Pol or Moondust

Suzanna gets started on the mammoth task of planting the new garden. There’s a lot to set up, including the most recent plants from the visit to Sixam. Unfortunately it would appear that we don’t have any loose UFO’s so can’t replant that one. Silas initially comes to help, but his only option is talking to the plants not playing in them. Boring! He pretends to cook for a while before channeling his Pops and creating another painted masterpiece.

Inside Adam gets Pollock ready for bed. Following some nice milk, Pollock burps without spitting, making Adam very happy. That is short lived however as the diaper change is a putrid horror (Come on EA, why doesn’t my squeamish sim get a negative moodlet when he has to change diapers[hold up he does eventually just not this time]). Once clean, Adam gets Pollock settled in his crib and plays the traditional lullaby in this house, twinkle twinkle.

Silas: *singing* we drop some blue over here, then splash some yellow yellow yellow

Adam: What are you doing

Suzanna: He’s being an artist, just like his Pops

Silas: I make pretty like Pops does, see Pops?

Adam: What a clever little man. And you remembered to do it outside! Good job

Silas: Pops think it good? Do I get 5 stars?

Adam: I think it’s great. Five stars for sure *to Suzanna* I’m just going to try show him how to pee properly again before bed

Suzanna: *chuckles* rather you than me

Silas: Pops, why can mummy not show

Adam: Silas... Mummy and Pops have different parts. My pixel parts are like you and your brother. Mummy has different ones

Silas: Oh. Why Pops?

Adam: Biology questions are best left to your Mummy

Silas: Bi -olo -gee *laughs*

Adam: Now, are you watching how I do this

Silas: *puts on game face* Yes Pops

...

Adam: And of course… most important part is ALWAYS wash your hands afterwards

Silas: Why Pops?

Adam: What comes out of our pixel parts can have germs

Silas: Why Pops?

Adam: Umm... biology? We want to wash germs off before the germs end up in our mouths and make us sick. Washing our hands keeps us and our stuff clean

With encouragement from Adam, Silas does his potty business without getting puddles over the floor.

Silas: Pops… I can’t reach for hands

Adam: Would you like me to lift you up

Silas: YES! Then I clean like you

Following a splashy hand washing Adam holds Silas above the crib to say goodnight to a sleeping Pollock. Changing to pyjamas Adam makes sure Silas is snuggled in soundly, and wishes him happy dreams.

*Satellite Whirs*

Adam: Take that UFO aliens! No abducting us tonight!

Suzanna: Really Adam?

Adam: I’m just trying to keep the population safe

Suzanna: Sure

Adam: Are you ready to go to bed? Test drive the bed placement?

Suzanna: Almost. I have a bit more watering-

Adam: Go to bed, I can finish it

Of course Suzanna swings by the nursery to kiss her sons goodnight before heading upstairs. By the time Adam is finished an exhausted Suzanna is snoring softly.

Adam: *chuckles* I love you

Pollock unlocks sleeping through the night but is still awake at 4am. With nothing much to do he has some solo tummy time, unlocking the creep milestone! Glitches abound as Family Day only appears for the kids and Adam, not Suzanna? Then Pollock somehow calls Adam from a separate floor and resetting Adam plops Pollock onto the floor. Whoops. Realism? Never heard of her

Despite not being able to grab yet Pollock happily plays in the bookcase, causing a swirl of dust to kick up.

Silas: Pol you want to- Pol?

Pollock: *cooing wildly*

Silas: *laughs* I like to make mess to

Adam: Okay, who's making the noise

Pollock: *sucks thumb innocently*

Silas: Pops! *runs for hug*

Adam: Good morning son, happy family day

Silas: We get gifts?

Adam: Later on you do, and so do me and Mummy

Suzanna: Aren’t you a clever clogs, getting out of your crib with only the watcher’s help

Pollock: *coos*

Suzanna: Let’s have some milk. Then Mummy will have breakfast and we can try more food huh? How about that?

Pollock: *burps*

Silas: *singing* We like the pancakes. We like, we like the pancakes

Suzanna: Here we are, safe and sound

Pollock: *coos greetings at everyone*

Adam heads out for a run, happily undisguised today. He’s hoping not to get any funny looks.

Suzanna: Let’s try some… hmm.. Mango? We don’t even have mango in game! Oh well, what do I know

Pollock: *coos questioningly*

Suzanna: Don’t worry Moondust, Mummy’s just talking to the watcher. Okay, open wide for the spaceship

Today however Pollock is not in love with the offering, being unable to make up his mind about it. He decides to play with it instead.

Adam enjoys his run. Sure enough the few sims he passes don’t even bat an eye at a jogging alien.

Suzanna: Mummy just has to have a shower but she’ll be right back okay *blows raspberry*

Pollock: *laughs and bounces legs*

...

Outside Silas has returned to his artwork from last night. He adds more of the same colours and throws in some extra ones for fun.

Once Suzanna has cleaned up for the day she carries Pollock out to his playmat and begins to tend to the growing plants.

While Adam finishes off his run and goes to write his column for work, the rest of the family spend time in the fresh air. Pollock plays in the shade and grabs his toys all by himself! Silas meanwhile mans the food truck while Suzanna studies the plants. A hop, skip and a glitch later Pollock is off the playmat and scoots to the garden to play in the growing plants.

Silas busies himself at his kitchen again, wondering if he can make pancakes. In the end we have a... sticker covered rock.

Silas: I made pancake with choc chips

Suzanna: Oh yeah you did! Great job

Silas: It pretty just like mummy

Suzanna: Aww, thank you Starshine *snuggles* Now how about we... open some presents?

Silas: PRESENTS???

Suzanna: The watcher told me it’s family day (but of course there's the bug which means holidays are still only registering for 3 sims per household)

Let’s see what we have. Silas gets a child's doctor playset, good thing his birthday is approaching (seriously who set up that toddlers could get children's toys). Suzanna gets Phozone, which she already has a ton of. Adam gets… well whatever it was, it was so normal for sims I have already forgotten it (It was one of those bears holding a heart). Suzanna gets Pollock up from his nap and gets him in the bath. Like normal he’s fascinated with the bubbles, trying to blow them around as Suzanna cleans him up.

Adam: Pollock has almost finished in the bath. Shall we have a bath or a bubble bath

Silas: NO. Not want bath! Boring!

Adam: *tuts* I see the problem, I phrased it as a question. But too bad! You’re having a bath Silas

Silas: No Pops! NO! *foolishly runs away into the bathroom*

Adam: What the- Get back here you!

Suzanna: *sighs* Isn’t it good you can’t run Pollock, hmm? Shall we do a bedtime story?

Pollock: *coos*

...

Adam: Silas! I am extremely disappointed in you my son

Silas: Huh? What's dis ap... disappa...

Adam: Disappointed! It means you've made me feel sad and mad because I thought you were better than this kind of behaviour. You have a brain, use it

Adam: Personal hygiene is important! I told you this yesterday

Silas takes a moment to think about what Adam has said, then he gets mad.

Silas: No! Pops is wrong! I not need bath! I have no stink cloud. I still good behaved

Adam: It’s about avoiding the stink clouds Silas

Silas: *throws fit*

Adam: Stop it! Now you can take off those overalls, or I’ll take them off, but you best believe you are having a bath mister

Silas: NO

Adam: I guess we’re taking them off together then

Silas: *pouts* I dis pointed

Suzanna comes in to clean the changing table after reading Pollock to sleep and is amazed to find a happy Silas patting bubbles.

Suzanna: Adam? What… happened

Adam: Once he got in the hot water he *flinches* remembered he likes to splash. Memory of a bloody goldfish

Silas: *splashes wildly and sings* I splish splash, you splish splash, ducky splish splash

Suzanna: Here’s hoping he remembers that for next time

Adam grumbles to himself as he continues getting soaked by Silas. When the bath is finished Suzanna volunteers to take over and Adam storms out of the bathroom leaving a confused Silas to be dried off.

Silas: Mummy, why Pops dis pointed

Suzanna: *sighs* You were behaving badly Silas. Pops was trying to help you, it was rude to run away and throw a fit. He was just disappointed because he thinks you're very smart and very nice

Silas: I show Pops tomorrow, promise

After a rushed dinner and bedtime Suzanna goes in search of Adam and finds him painting upstairs (in my mind she's absolutely drinking some tea during this scene).

Suzanna: Hey you. How you doing after Silas...

Adam: *sighs* I'm better now. I painted my anger without smashing through the canvas, and now it seems I’m much more flirty. Watcher Starlight I was just... so... mad! Why couldn’t he just get in the damn bath when I asked? He likes baths!

Suzanna: Because he’s a toddler? Remember My Heart they don't have fully grown brains yet. We have to teach them how to do things. Unfortunately kids don't come with software telling them to do what their parents tell them

Adam: Yeah *sighs* I guess I’m just worried Starlight

Suzanna: About having a temper?

Adam: Sort of. I'm worried that one day I’ll get mad and flip out and they’ll hate me forever

Suzanna: I could flip out to you know

Adam: *scoffs* As if

Suzanna: I could! Every time I pick up Pol and he cries and hits me I get mad. He’s an infant, he can’t get places by himself. Of course I have to pick him up, he would die otherwise. Why does he have to be so bloody stubborn about it. It makes me feel like he hates me, like I'm a failure

Adam: You could never be a failure to me. But I am glad to hear it’s not just my hold he hates

Suzanna: *chuckles* Yeah he’s definitely not a snuggler. Maybe I should copy you and try painting my anger away

Adam: Painting, writing... The help me focus outside of myself

Suzanna: Hmm. I guess working on the garden gives me a similar feeling. It's as if- oh shoot

Adam: What?

Suzanna: I forgot to call in a day off for Silas' birthday, one sec

Adam: My wife voluntarily missing work? Next you'll say pigs can fly

Suzanna: I want to be here for Silas, and Pol. I know you don’t want more kids, heck you didn’t want these two, and I’m going to do my best to respect that. It just means I want to spend time with them while they still want to spend time with me

Adam: Hey... I’d like to spend some time with you *raises eyebrows*

Suzanna: *laughs* You’re such a dork

Adam: But you love me and I love you

Suzanna: Hmm, this is true

After woohoo the two fall asleep in each others arms, glad to have found each other on this small hunk of rock.

Previous ... Next

[space-girlllll]

So I was originally meant to post this on on another post with a bunch of AUs and headcanons but it got a bit long so I’ll post it earlier than I was meant to @salaapaoo:

Kim rok soo had always been kind of the older brother to the kids in the orphanage: 

When krs first got to the orphanage he I'm not sure the canon age but my head always goes 8 or 13 yrs old so he wasn’t that big yet but still older than a lot of them.

I read a head-canon somewhere (I cannot for the life of me remember where, but this is where I got the idea is this technically theirs help) where he took care of the younger kids there.

Just bcs of the angst potential of this, every kid he takes care of or begins to care for leaves immediately, they get adopted quickly or they’re parents come back for them, some even ended up dead. So once the orphanage workers/helpers realized this strange system, they began to dump most of the children in his care. The workers/helpers who worked at the orphanage often stole or embezzled the funds they had. Kim rok soo had to look for food and get money by himself and taking care of the kids at the same time. There would be days in which where he would starve himself for the children, they were too young they shouldn’t have to suffer the way he did. There were even times he couldn’t find any food, he would clutch the children in a close hug as they cried from hunger and pain.

Fluff time! Maybe he would come to school for them in place of PTCs (Parent Teacher Conference) taught some of them to read and write, played games with them, help them when they get sick. When they have nightmares they often run to Kim rok soo, he was there safe place, he would maybe hug them and stroke their hair, sometimes even singing them to sleep (not me using this as an excuse for an i bet on losing dogs songfic).

After the workers left the children to him, he quickly learned how to organize food for the children, tie or even cut their hair, maybe he helps them with homework in-between his own working and they all have some set time for home work and school things, and as time flies by he soon is the oldest kid there and there is no one to help him out.

As he has to leave the orphanage eventually, he left them money, that he had worked hard for himself, that he’d spent hours tolling on work to give them, so they wouldn’t be left with nothing, so they'd remember he cared. Before he left he turned to the eldest of them, she was 15 and left in charge by Kim rok soo, the caretakers wouldn’t change even after he left and he trusted her, his little sister, after quickly going through his checklist on the things he’d left behind for them, to make sure they’d be safe and happy, even with him gone, he gives her a soft smile “Don’t forget you are still a child yourself, play around and cause trouble, children should be children.” before hugging her tightly and finishing his goodbyes not being able to hear her saying “What about you Oppa?”

Maybe he meets the girl again, during the apocalypse when she joins team 1 under Team leader Lee soo hyuk’s lead as a grade 1 ability swordsman. The two stay close, despite the time that had past Kim rok soo couldn’t help but still treat her the same way he did when she was a child he had been one too, taking care of her, making sure she was alright and not overworking, she even became close with Cjs and Lsh as Krs slowly befriended them. She teased krs often and complained along with cjs and lsh about his bad habits of sacrificing himself (like all younger siblings do such as myself).

They were all happy, they really were, till the massacre incident finally came and blew his entire world away, his brothers, his sister, his friends and family, the team that was his entire life, was gone and he was left with nothing but the broken pieces of his life, memories, and dreams of what could’ve been. Memories of playing with small giddy children, memories of older siblings being there for him and helping him, all disappearing as fast as the life was sucked out his family.

After the transmigration, there would be times when he looked at Lilly and saw her. The younger sister that he cared for and raised. He sees her in Lilly's brown hair, their shared sword style, and sometimes he would even slip up and call lily by her name. After a few times, Lilly finally asks "Oraeboni, who is (name)?" He freezes as the records of her death rewind in his mind. He can't stop it. Lilly resembles her too much, so he distances himself, hoping that it would lessen the pain. Lilly and (name) look like they could've been sisters... Almost like twins with how Lilly looks almost exactly like the little girl he raised. It hurts too much... He can't be there.

During the end of part 1 when GoD told Cale about Sui, he tells him a bit more than that. He tells him about someone else who reincarnated in the world-- in Roan. His little sister had been reincarnated as Lilly Henituse, the little sister of the original owner of this body. The God of Death then explains that he couldn't return her memories to her. Despite all of the things that Cale had changed and accomplished, GoD still couldn't return Lilly’s memories from her previous lifeto her.

 When he sees her again, he's just devastated and pulls her close, holding her tightly as he slowly rubs the back of her head like how he always had in their previous lives. Meanwhile, the others are just confused because he usually has a sad look in his eyes whenever he would look at her before quickly averting his eyes. They're happy to see the two of them getting along though. LIlly is confused at first, but the hug felt so warm and strangely familiar. She's sure that she's felt it before, but the thought is quickly replaced with feelings of content from being hugged by her oraeboni

[pbandjesse]

Today was a pretty good day. I was still riding the high of buying our house. And we got a lot of stuff done. It felt good. Today was good.

I did not sleep good though. I woke up around 4 with a bad pain in my ribs. I was not having fun and falling back asleep was very very rough. I was able to eventually but it took forever.

When I woke up at 7 though I felt fine. I was happy to see James. I was in a good mood. James let me know that they went to the house to drop off some stuff. And discovered that while we were given 4 keys, 3 of them were all for the back door and I had the only front door one. This is hilarious. We will have to get more front door ones made ASAP. In the meantime James just let themselves in the backdoor and everything was just fine.

I got myself together and we left a little early. We left together. And I had a nice drive to camp. There wasn't any traffic on my drive, but going the opposite way I saw 3 different fender benders that were causing so much traffic. It was for miles.

I got to camp before 8. And it was cold but not as cold as yesterday. I was in a good mood.

I had some stuff to do this morning. I wanted to do my drawing for the day but that was all I would get done. Because pretty quickly I was working on documenting things bought for the house and making a more solid plan for what ones furniture were buying and a few other things. Just wanting to go at it with the best data and staying in budget. And so far so good.

I decided I would put together the desk Alexi got from IKEA yesterday. And that was going really well. Until I got to the last steps.

When everyone else came in I was putting the last screws in but was struggling because it wasn't 100% lining up and so Alexi and Heather were trying to help hold it but it wasn't working. And then it was missing a plastic triangle that holds the desk up to be a standing desk.

So I was like. Okay problem solved. And went to turn it over and that's when we realized that the entire top of the table was scratched and gouged? What? Did I do that?? How??? I hadn't looked at the top when I opened the box. I just put it on the floor. But it was so extensively scratched that Alexi didn't think it was possible that I did it by accident. And so we think it may have been a return that was our back in the floor? It was so weird. And I was so upset.

But Sarah took over and got customer service on the computer they are giving us a new table, and letting us keep the scratched one. Sarah was such a rockstar. I really appreciated her handling that because I was so upset.

Since she did that I took over creating labels to send letters to Europe for our camp America staff. I had to go through a bunch of very unfamiliar addresses. But I was able to collect everything and learned to create labels and how to print them. New skill unlocked.

Me and Sarah moved the scratched desk up to the attic and found that one of the buck heads had fallen down. So we moved that back to a better spot. Decided he was the guard dog of the attic. We were just in a little bit of a silly mood.

Heather asked us if we could go set up some tables and chairs over at the lodge for when John the consultant was coming. No problem. So we walked across the feild. I love walking through the snow. It's slightly frozen on top so it's really crunchy. And we talked about paint and colors. Specifically haint blue. And how it's supposed to keep spiders away. I think it would be nice to use that color somewhere in the house.

I have paint on the mind for sure. Later this evening me and James would discuss painting. And specifically we realized that the entire house is grey. Including the ceilings. I am mostly sure that it is actually just primer because of the matte texture and how easily it scuffs. So we are going to have to do a lot of painting sooner rather then later. Maybe we will use haint blue somewhere.

After we finished setting up the tables and chairs and things we went back to the office for lunch. I read some of my book. Learned about cowboys and how hobbling a horse is a way of breaking them. Which lead to me and Heather talking about how my highschool principal broke wild horses as a young man. And now he got his jaw broken by one of them and that story was wild. Especially since he told it to us in Bible class.

I was telling Heather all about the weird stuff at my school. And just the stuff I had to unlearn or relearn because we weren't really socialized to people outside the church. But I don't really have many shocking moments learning that something was weird anymore. It's been a few years since I have had to deal with that.

Eventually it was time to go to the lodge for the meeting. And it was a long meeting. I won't rehash it completely but I got a little frustrated at times. And I don't want Alexi to think that I don't love camp, because I do! So much! But I also want camp to be better and when we just talk about it but we aren't actually doing anything but talking it makes me feel crazy. I don't want to talk broad, I want specifics, I want answers and direction! I got some kudos about all the program writing I had done but I still felt like no one was saying what exactly we were doing. And I get it but also it's incredibly frustrating for me when I can see some answers. Ugh.

Chris was in this meeting too. And I think between Alexi talking about best case scenarios and Chris talking about the worst case I was just a little over frustrated. I really hope I didn't come off as a brat but I was pushing for answers pretty hard. And at least tomorrow I have some direction for working on village programing.

John is very inspirational but I think the office wants him to be more then that and I don't think that's realistic. He's there to give them a push but they have to be the ones to do it. And I can only write so much. Like I don't care if we use exactly what I've made, it won't hurt my feelings, but at least I've done something and we aren't working from nothing or just imagining. I have made something tangible. And I hope that helps push everyone else forward.

We finished up the meeting and I packed up the screens and books we used to prop up John's projector. I chatted with everyone for a few minutes. But it was time for me to go.

I trudged across the field and stopped at the office. I got my tablet and my lunch bag. My first package of my Amazon order came and that was exciting. I chatted with Sarah for a few minutes but she had a tour to give. So I was off and heading home.

I had a stop at amazing glaze first to get me and Callie's bowls and I was so so happy with how they came out. They look amazing. I am so thrilled with my room and I think this might be my favorite piece. Even more then my ducks and I love my ducks.

After I sent pictures to Callie I went home for real..I was so happy to see James. I texted them and let them know I was home so they could bring some stuff done to start packing the car.

We brought a few boxes and got as much in the car as we could. I decided to bring some toilet paper, tissues, and paper towels to have over there. And then we headed to our new house!

The street was not as dark as it had been that one night. There are actually street lights and each house has a light so we are doing good there. And I was so happy to walk around the house. I can be a little more critical now. Some of the trim paint is messy on baseboards. The vinal flooring they referred to as luxury is. Fine. But the biggest issue I have noticed is the colors of the walls and ceilings.

It's grey. It's all grey. And like I said earlier I think it's just primer? Painting the ceilings was not in the plan. Painting walls sure, but ceilings is a lot of work. It's not impossible but it will take some planning and I am really hoping we can get it done sooner rather then later so we don't have to cover all of our belongings. I will have to look into that this weekend or this upcoming week.

While we were at the house, after we got all of the stuff inside I decided to build the toilet paper storage I bought. It's so cute. It was a little difficult to put together but that's okay. James helped. And it felt good that we have made something just for this house. That felt. Really good.

We would also change out some of the knobs in the kitchen. And then I had some weird hinged ones I put in the bathroom. We would do a ton of measuring for the living room and trying to make some plans for the walls. I am excited to figure out how to do new types of diy work and I'm just so excited. Even if I'm not looking forward to painting the ceilings.

After we had done everything we thought we could for the evening we would gather ourselves and went to dinner.

We decided to go to five guys. And that was fun. I showed James my lists and we discussed deligating tasks. James was being so sweet. We were laughing about the soda machine being in Spanish. It was just so lovely. I love my husband so much.

We would soon go home. And I became exhausted as soon as we got home. I would shake off the brain tired but I just wanted to get in bed. I would first add some new water to my tanks and kiss Sweetp. And then got in bed to be cuddly.

Our landlady Tina called that a new oven is supposed to be delivered tomorrow. And we were finally able to break the news. We bought a house. And she was so excited for us. So the plan is to be out of here at the end of February and we have a reference for possibly Julien and his roommate moving in. She said she is always excited when her tenants buy something permanent and I had been so nervous about telling her. Because she's always so lovely to us. So I'm just so glad she reacted so positively.

And now I am just very ready to sleep. I am going to grab a shower and brush my teeth and get ready for sleep.

I don't know if I need to go to camp tomorrow. It's supposed to snow overnight and throughout the day tomorrow. So we will see what the day holds. If I'm working at home or what. But I think it will still be a lovely day.

I hope you all have a great night. I love you all. Sleep good!

[ashendalia]

Bet, tell me more about Griff cause I wanna know more about your boy

HI YES SO LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT GRIFF

ALSO THIS IS LONG SO SORRY ABOUT THAT

Griff wasn't always a quiet meek mannered person, in fact when he was younger he was actually the opposite. He was short tempered, loud, arrogant, and honestly quite a huge asshole that most people did not like.

He did not get along with his parents at all because he wanted to join the army and fight for his country while they were anti-war activists. His father was actually killed by the army because of it too, but at that time he took it more as a sign that he needed to do something and actually make a difference instead of just preaching something.

So he joined the army, but when he told his mom she told him he was insane. His ideals were so opposite that right then and there he stormed out and left. That was 8 years ago now, and he only recently spoke to her again through telegram for the first time since then.

When Griff's finally in the army, he gets placed in a squad under a captain that doesn't take priority in crushing the enemy and instead places it with the safety of his men. And he is NOT happy about it and he makes it known out loud, and he also butts heads with most of his squad mates because they're there for the money and not the honor of fighting for their country. He is dead-set on fighting for his country and getting a medal for his loyalty and work that he doesn't hear out any other views (and also he is young and a jackass).

Despite being this loud, confrontational, quick tempered asshat, he actually did make a friend and the two had a sort of camaraderie despite being in the army for different reasons. This guy was probably his only friend too because no one else except superiors put up with his shit.

Eventually there came a battle where beforehand Griff tried to argue with the captain that his plan wasn't effective and that there was an opportunity to strike at the enemy and deal a huge blow to their forces, but the captain didn't want to risk his squad's lives for it. Well, Griff managed to get some soldiers on his side and during the battle they broke off and went and attacked the enemy directly. And it worked! The enemy got crushed, though the soldiers that came with him were killed too.

As he made his way back to his own camp, he found that the whole place was burning down and there were bodies everywhere. The further he continued, the more dead soldiers from his squad he saw and he couldn't wrap his head around how this happened. He eventually found an instructor barely alive and they told him that the captain knew he would attack the enemy so he changed the formation to try to save him and that's why the camp was how it is now, and then died right after.

Griff couldn't understand why the captain would do this after he had always caused so much trouble for the man and starts looking for him. Instead he comes across his only friend, barely alive and left leg blown off from an explosion. His friend is glad to see he's okay, and Griff starts apologizing for what happened because of him. His friend isn't angry or anything though, he even tells him that he would've liked a medal too before passing away.

Griff keeps going trying to find the captain, and he is breaking down in tears now, and the whole time he just keeps seeing the bodies of his squad mates all around him. He finds the captain finally and rushes over to him to try to wake him, but gets no response. He grabs the man's hand because he wants so badly for the captain to reprimand him for what happened, he needs the captain to do to him for what he caused because this is his fault.

Griff is barely able to begin to form the words to apologize, and his crying is not helping at all either. The captain is able to come around just long enough to hear him and tell him "I'm glad you survived..." before passing, and Griff is left the only survivor.

Well, he finally got his medal. He's a hero now and the enemy withdrew, and all it took was losing his whole squad in that battle.

Griff is absolutely a mess after this though. He's given time off, though all he can bring himself to do his hide in his house and try to drink away pain. He wakes up, drinks until he passes out, and the process repeats day after day after day. When he's awake he replays the memories in his head and when he's asleep he has nightmares about what happened on that battlefield, and ultimately no amount of alcohol is going to drown it away.

His thoughts spiral deeper into regret. If he hadn't ignored orders and gone off on his own they would all be alive. What even was the point of doing it? Was it for pride? Justice? Selfishness? A goddamned medal?

At this point he thinks the best thing to do is end it all and loads his gun and puts it to his head. He didn't get the chance to pull the trigger though because him being in his drunken state caused him to lose his balance and pass out after hitting a table. When he wakes up he sees the letter congratulating him and and giving him the date for being rewarded with a medal of honor and being promoted to captain, which is tomorrow.

He takes some sleeping pills and goes to bed. He dreams about that battlefield again, and this time in his dream he tries to change things. He doesn't go off on his own, he stays at his base and kills any enemy soldier he sees. But even this changes nothing because he eventually looks out on the battlefield and sees the faces of his squad on the dead bodies. He finally realizes that no matter what he does, he can't save them.

When he wakes up he asks his captain what he should do and how to atone for his sins. He then gets dressed in his formal wear and accepts the medal and promotion to captain.

AND THATS ONLY HIS BACKSTORY

As a captain himself, he's very wary of putting his own men in danger and always pulls them back before anything bad can happen to them. His plans are always very cautious and he's always putting their safety over wiping out the enemy. Some of his own men call him a coward for his tactics and even started calling him 'Captain Craven' behind his back, but he lets them continue because his highest concern is their safety and making sure they stay alive.

This doesn't mean he isn't ruthless in battle still though. His squad and he have completely and utterly wiped out enemy forces and bandits that were threatening villagers before, and if his men aren't in high danger they will kill. He's not afraid to kill enemies, it's his job as a soldier, and he'll continue doing it to protect his country and his men. Even then he does feel guilt for having to kill so much.

He's very much living for the sake of others at this point. He sees himself as unworthy of redemption and so he does everything he can to make sure others survive, even putting himself in mortal danger just to rescue someone across enemy lines.

Now he's much more reserved, quiet, and very nonconfrontational. He doesn't care if his men insult him behind his back because all that matters to him is keeping them alive and safe. Truthfully though, I'm sure the longer his men are with him the more the understand that his orders are the way they are so that they can go home when this is all over and they do appreciate him for that.

ON A LIGHTER NOTE

His favorite food is smoked fish! And he's very skilled at games that use perfect information, like chess, checkers, and Reversi!

also his hobby is drinking alcohol but that is not a lighter note and it makes me sad

IN CONCLUSION

I love him 🥺

[lithesunflower]

Fragile Strength Part 15

Part 1  Part 2  Part 3  Part 4  Part 5  Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9  Part 10  Part 11  Part 12   Part 13  Part 14

Author’s Note: So everyone wanted different things so here is just everything, Whump, Fluff, and Story building all in one! I hope you enjoy 

Over the next few weeks Spider and Anya got used to a new routine as the monsoon season arrived. If it as cloudy in the mornings Anya would leave for a bit to go and get breakfast for both of them while Spider slept. She would bring it back before moving to massage Spider's head until the clouds eventually parted.

Thankfully most of the storms happened either in the morning or the late afternoon but didn't last all day. If the storms seemed to be brewing Anya would make up some sort of excuse about being tired or too warm and Spider would follow her to the lab where he could take his mask off and relax until the storms passed.

He still got the migraines, the terrible throbbing in his head but usually if they caught it early enough Anya could massage away the worst of it.

One day, the sun came up and stayed out all day. Making for  a long and fun day for both Spider and Anya. They had played with the Sully kids, done some deep diving with the Metkayina clan, and even helped to forage and plant in the gardens.

Needless to say both of them were exhausted. Anya hardly even ate dinner she could barely keep her eyes open and eventually Spider got up and gently picked the girl up in his arms to take her to the med hut they both liked so much.

“I can walk” she mumbled softly and Spider just chuckled

“Yeah…walk right into the ocean” he teased her. She gave him a playful pinch in response and he just smirked.

He put her down inside the med hut and moved to check his mask oxygen level. His oxygen was good so he moved to curl up a few feet away from Anya starting to let unconsciousness take him. Moments later he felt her curling into his side, no matter how far apart they started she always found her way up to his side. It was a comfort feeling her that close and Spider would be lying if he said he hadn’t been waiting for her to snuggle up before he fell asleep. A painted arm gently draped over the small girl’s body and both of them were out in seconds.

It was still dark when Spider woke something having stirred him from sleep. He realized it was nearly dawn and decided he should go and help with some of the morning preparations since the sky seemed to be clear. He had been feeling guilty about not being much help the last few weeks. He hated leaving Anya but he also couldn’t bear to wake her. He slipped away quietly and hurried to start helping.

A few hours later at breakfast Spider was starting to wonder how long Anya would sleep. She was often more tired than he was and they had been pretty busy the day before, maybe today she was just extra tired. Still it wasn't like her to miss breakfast. The sun continued to climb in the sky and Spider finally went to check on Anya.

She was still curled up like he had left her and that caused Spider to reach out to brush some of the hair from her face. He nearly jumped back in shock as he felt heat radiating off of her. In one quick motion he had grabbed the blankets off of her and was searching her for signs of distress. That was when he saw them, one on her collarbone and one of her wrist, large nasty bites, bites Spider had never seen. They were dark and the skin around them looked red and angry. Spider scooped the girl up and ran from the hut

“Help! Help! I need help!” He called out running as fast as he could towards the middle of camp. Many of the Na’vi looked up in concern but it was Ronal that Spider was looking for. The woman appeared and took one look at Anya before pointing to the blankets in the corner of her own hut.

“Set her down” she instructed. Spider set the girl down and watched on anxiously, his chest heaving with deep breaths. Ronal moved her hands along the girls body before quickly turning her to her side and reaching down the back of her shirt and yanking something from the girl’s back. She held up the dark bug it’s fangs clicking as it protested to being moved away from its prey.

Spider recognized the creature instantly and for the first time ever wanted to kill something out of pure rage. Usually Kali'weya stayed away but it seemed that the season was warm and this one had found it’s way into the med hut. Anya being human meant she was easy prey and the insect had started its work circulating poison into the girl’s system.

Even with the creature detached Anya looked pale and fragile. Spider moved forward to touch her but Ronal held up her hand. “I need to work on her…she may not be safe yet” she said softly. “Go” she commanded and Spider felt fear in his heart as he was moved from the hut.

Spider paced back and forth in anger, frustration. He picked up a few rocks hurling them into the sea and yelling loudly. It was Kiri who came to his side.

“Monkey boy” she said gently as she approached. Spider turned, his eyes red from crying.

“Why!? Why her? She didn’t do anything! She’s innocent why doesn’t the great mother protect her!?” He screamed. Why was it like this? Spider loved Pandora, loved the Na’vi, had always considered this his home but now he felt like at every turn there was some sort of danger to Anya and it didn’t make sense. How could this world that had always seemed so beautiful and peaceful be so deadly to her? How could this place he loved, this place that he felt so connected to be the reason he might lose his companion?

Kiri sat down and patted the area beside her.  

Spider reluctantly moved and sat down huffing in frustration. “It’s not fair…Eywa should be protecting her…of all creatures…” he said. “I know she’s human like me…I know we’re different…but I thought the great mother cared about us too…”

“But Spider…” Kiri began “Don’t you see? She does…she does care…Anya is alive because of you” she said. “You found her in time and she’s being tended to…she’ll be okay…if it had been much later she wouldn’t be but Eywa gave you your intuition and you knew to check on her”

Spider just shook his head in frustration. “But she shouldn’t have been hurt to begin with! Why is this world so dangerous to her!?”

“Earth was dangerous too…” Kiri said. “There will always be danger Spider”

The boy looked distraught and sad “Why can’t I…why can’t I protect her?”

“You did Spider…we can’t stop bad things from happening to those we love…but we can be there to help with the healing” she whispered, gently touching his arm. Spider leaned into Kiri’s shoulder, exhaustion falling over him as the adrenaline from earlier began to wear off.

“I just don’t understand…I love pandora…but…” he didn’t know how to finish that thought.

“Perhaps you are looking at this wrong…Eywa sent you to protect Anya…you found her in the forest, you found her today, Eywa has given you great purpose Spider…she is using you to protect Anya and us…” she said. “You have come to my rescue plenty of times, and Tuk’s we all know that you would never let something happen to her” Spider sighed softly.

“I suppose I hadn’t thought of it that way” he said. “Kiri…I…” he hesitated before speaking again "I wanted to kill that thing that touched her today” he said. “I’ve never felt like this. I mean I've been angry before but...I would do anything to protect her..." he whispered.

Kiri smiled and nodded "I know you would...and it seems that she would do anything to protect you too...she cares about you a lot" she said.

"I miss her....I mean I've only been away from her for today and I miss her..." he sighed shaking his head. "I'm scared I'll lose her...and...and I...I don't know if I could be okay again...if I did" Kiri hugged Spider close.

"You can't live in fear of what might be...you have to enjoy what you have while you have it" she whispered, sadness creeping into her voice.

Guilt filled Spider as thoughts of Neteyam filled his mind, thoughts of Quaritch and all that had happened. He felt like he had betrayed the Sullys and he couldn't even tell them. It made him ache more for Anya, for her presence, the way she knew how to cheer him up and turn his thoughts.

Ronal appeared and nodded to Spider and Kiri "She's awake...she's asking for you" the woman said.

Spider jumped up quickly and rushed towards the hut but he stopped and glanced back at Kiri for a second

"Thank you" he said softly. Kiri smiled at him and watched him go. Her eyes filled with tears as she watched him disappear into the hut to take care of the blonde girl. She remembered when they were close, she and Spider, now it was so rare that she even got to talk to him. Anya was always there and often the two seemed to have their own language they spoke with each other that Kiri did not understand. Everything was different now with Neteyam gone. She wished again that she could go back to the night that Spider was kidnapped and undo what had been done. Now it seemed things would never be the same between them.

Spider hurried to Anya's side, slowing down just enough so he wouldn't startle her as he appeared. She still looked pale and tired but her emerald eyes held their usual spark when she saw him.

"Spider!" she grinned reaching out for him with her good hand. Her other wrist was wrapped up as well as the bite near her collarbone and on her back.

"You scared me" Spider said almost instantly scooping Anya into his arms and hugging her close. She squealed in surprise but wrapped her arms around him.

"Did your head hurt today?" she asked, worried about him.

"Anya...you're the one who's been hurt today...I'm fine...you..." Spider choked up, how was it that she could be the one hurt and still be trying to look out for him?

"I'm okay now...I'm sorry...I didn't mean to scare you" she said softly, melodically, her voice was so sweet.

"You have nothing to be sorry for..." Spider whispered. "Come on...I'm taking you back to the labs"

"But its getting late and you hate sleeping in the labs"

"I hate sleeping alone way more and the bugs won't touch you in the lab" he insisted. He stood easily with her in his arms and she giggled softly.

"Spider! I can walk!"

"No way!" he said with determination "I'm not letting you go till we are safe inside the labs" he said. There was a playfulness to his tone but he also seemed pretty serious. Anya rolled her eyes but kept her arms round his neck as he carried her.

Once they were inside Spider set Anya on the bed and took his mask off. Anya sat there looking at him crossing her arms defiantly

"Well I'm not going to sleep yet! I'm not tired! So what are we going to do till I'm sleepy?" she asked. Spider looked confused for a moment, it was still pretty early in the night even though it was dark out. They certainly had time to do something.

"Well...ummm..." he thought for a moment then grinned. "Stay here!" he said before putting his mask back on and disappearing outside. He came back with a large bowl of sand and several rocks and sticks.

Anya looked at him like he had lost his mind "You know I think the idea of being inside the lab is to leave outside...outside" she teased him. He narrowed his eyes at her as he took his mask off.

"Ha ha very funny, come here" he said motioning for her to sit on the floor with him. But he seemed to reconsider "Wait, stay there," he found a way to set the bowl down on the bed before sitting crosslegged at the other end. Anya sat up and scooted closer, watching as Spider drew a few lines in the sand.

"Do you want to be rocks or sticks?" Spider asked

"Rocks?" Anya asked not sure what exactly she was agreeing to. Spider nodded and gave Anya the small pile of rocks.

"Okay this is called Toe Tacks...or Tac Toes? I don't remember, but I learned it when I was trapped..." He explained "The goal is to get three in a row...and that is my goal too...so you have to block me if I'm getting close and I have to block you. We take turns until one of us has three in a row or until the board is full" Anya looked a little confused

"Okay..." she placed one of her rocks and Spider countered with one of his sticks. They went back and forth before Spider announced

"I won!" Anya looked at him confused

"How?! You don't have three in a row!" she insisted.

"Yes I do...see" he pointed to one in the bottom left corner, one in the middle and one at the top right corner.

"You did not say that it could be diagonal!" Anya insisted

"Well I didn't say it couldn't be!" Spider countered.

"Well then mine right here count too" she said pointing to the one at the top middle, top left and middle left.

"No it doesn't...those don't make a straight line" Spider explained seriously.

"Your line is slanted it's not straight" Anya argued.

"It is too straight! It doesn't have a corner!"

"Fine...I still think you're cheating though..." Anya said "Come on let"s play again...I'm gonna beat you this time!"

"Yeah right!" Spider said crossing his arms. They played several more rounds but soon Anya was finding a way to win every one and Spider was starting to get flustered.

"Now you're cheating!" he said trying to figure out her strategy. She just giggled and shrugged

"I'm not!" she said

"You are too...let me be the rocks!" Spider said thinking maybe she had some sort of advantage being rocks.

"No way!" Anya said holding her rocks out of reach. Spider just leaned over her trying to grab her fist as she laughed "Spider no! You're gonna knock over the bowl!" she squealed as she tried not to collapse in a fit of laughter.

She was holding the rocks so far away that she lost her balance and started to fall off the bed. Spider tried to catch her which just resulted in him also losing balance and tilting towards the floor. On his way down he knocked the bowl over so it spilled sand all over both of them leaving them in a puddle of sand, rocks, sticks, and laughter on the floor.

Anya was laughing so hard she could hardly breathe and Spider was sitting up pulling twigs from his hair and looking shocked at the mess they had just made.

"Are you hurt?" he asked worry suddenly clouding his features for a moment. Anya couldn't even respond she was laughing so hard but she shook her head which didn't seem to calm Spider at all.

"Are you sure? Anya...geez I didn't mean to do that" he said checking her over and pushing her hair away from her neck to check that none of her bandages were off.

Anya took a deep breath but just continued to giggle. Her smile, the sound of her laughter made Spider feel like the whole room was glowing. He felt that flutter in his chest again as he looked at her, covered in sand and twigs. He found himself reaching out and brushing her hair back from her face as he leaned over her. His own smile started to form at the sound of her glee.

He was inches from her, and the laughter seemed to slow and come to a stop as they both realized how close they were. Spider couldn't take his eyes off of her. Her eyes, her face, her hair....she was breathtaking and he had known it but the way she was looking at him, they way he saw her right now...it was different.

It was slow, both of their hearts racing in their chests, but quiet settling over them. Spider leaned closer, his hand moving to carefully cup her cheek, fingers brushing her neck as he closed the gap between them, softly pressing his lips to hers. Anya seemed surprised but she kissed him back instantly, without hesitation. Her arms moved to wrap around his neck. She tasted like fruit and honey.

As he kissed her he could feel how delicate she was and yet there was a strength he had never given her credit for. When he pulled away from her she just smiled at him, breathless, quiet, happy. He had pulled away from her for air but he almost instantly leaned back in, only hesitating slightly to make sure that she was okay with it. His hands rested again her soft skin, cupping her face with one hand and her neck with the other.

Spider had spent years never feeling like he belonged anywhere, always feeling like he was half of what he should be, half human, half Na'vi, half family, half wanted... Even with Quaritch he had felt something but had felt like it was a betrayal to his Na'vi family to get too close to the man who held his father's memories. But now, for the first time in his life, Spider didn't feel like half, he didn't feel conflicted or like there were two sides pulling him in different direction. He felt fully known, cared for, wanted.

When he moved to pull away from the second kiss Anya whimpered softly keeping her hand on his neck pulling him closer, she didn't want him to stop. She cared about him, he could feel it, he could feel her wanting to be close to him and it was like every bad thing, every bad thought, every fear he had ever known disappeared knowing she wanted to be this close to him.

Eventually they did have to part for air but Spider was beaming. "I've...never done that..." he whispered and Anya chuckled softly.

"Me either..." she whispered back feeling like they needed to be quiet.

"Anya...I..." Spider didn't know the words to say, he didn't know how to express what he felt being that close to her, sharing that kiss with her. Anya didn't know the words either but she reached out and brushed his cheek with her fingers.

"I see you" Spider said gently.

"I see you..." Anya whispered back her eyes locked on him.

Spider felt like he had swallowed a whole family of butterflies his stomach was doing so many somersaults.

"Spider?" Anya whispered

"Hmm?"

"We are going to be in so much trouble when Norm and Max get back if we don't clean this up" she teased him softly. Spider grinned and shrugged

"I'll just tell them you did it..." he said earning himself a playful scowl and a pinch as Anya wiggled out from under him to start cleaning.

[soubi122]

The Artist and Her Canvases - PT 20

BontenxReader, no minors, violence, suggestive material/situations, smut, light fluff, blood, murder, mentions/use of illegal substances, mentions/use of illegal activity.

Ugh - this was so fluffy for me, it couldn't help it. Fluffy smut...ahh yes... 📢spoilers for those who have not read the manga

Part 20 - The Fire in Her Eyes

The rest of the morning was spent with Mikey’s head on your chest - the stories and confessions felt like it was opening old wounds for him. His body tensed when he would say certain names, you stroked his head and ran your fingers through his hair to try and comfort him. For the first time you saw Mikey vulnerable. He explained to you who Baji was, his connection with Chifuyu and Kazutora, and his older brother Shinichiro - the grave of the man who you brought flowers for. This explained why he abandoned you when you met in Japan. Losing his sister Emma and his half brother (not blood related), Izana - made him push away all friends. The others eventually fell in place after he disbanded Toman. The things they did when Bonten was formed… There was so much pain and suffering in his life that Mikey not only left his close friends behind, he left his heart behind too - the walls that were built around him were impenetrable. That is until you came back. 

“Mikey…I’m so sorry.” Your voice was almost a whisper, you embraced him tighter and couldn’t help but sob. You wanted to take his pain away, you wanted to make it stop - the memories, the guilt, the mistakes, everything. “Why are you crying, angel? I should be the one crying right now.” Mikey chuckled as he nuzzled his face deeper into your chest. He could hear how hard your heart was beating, the sniffles and hiccups echoed in your chest. “I’ll never leave you…I’ll always love you.” Your words were enough to make his heart melt and alleviate some of the pain. Still, he understood that it was no excuse for him to have been so callous with you yesterday. He wanted to show you how much you mean to him, how much he loves you and also apologize for the pain he caused. 

His hand began to wander your hips and gently tug at the waistband of your shorts, sending shivers down your spine. You could feel how his hand brushed your thighs when he pulled your shorts down - his hands were shaking. He was trying to be as gentle as possible, afraid that you might break in his hands. He trailed kisses from your chest to your belly, down to your hips and settled between your legs. Each kiss set your body on fire, you could feel the heat begin to pool in your core. Mikey gently spread your legs open and trailed more kisses from your knees to your thighs - he could feel how your body twitched when he got to your inner thighs. “Did I ever tell you how much I missed you?” His words made your heart skip a beat. You thought he buried his memories of you when you separated 8 years ago. You hummed and shook your head no. “Let me show you…” 

Mikey’s right hand spread your folds apart and his breath hitched at seeing how wet you were. His tongue began to lap your honey and dart in and out of your core. The warm and wet muscle was hitting sweet spots that had your back arching, your light and breathy moans were making his cock throb. “...Mikey.” Moaning his name out loud had him basking. You ran your fingers through his white hair and tugged at it gently when he slipped two digits in your core. He could feel how your walls clenched and fluttered at being toyed with. Curving his fingers, he made you mewl and throw your head back in pleasure. His gentle and slow pace was killing you, he was determined on building your orgasm up - keeping you on the edge until he was ready. “I thought about you everyday when I left…” His words were almost a whisper. Between licks and kisses, he kept pouring his heart out for you. “I saw you the day you left…I wanted to stop you from getting on that plane…” Tears were now streaming down your face, where exactly was he that day? “I was afraid I’d never let you go…” Mikey’s mouth latched on to your bundle of nerves and began to slowly and softly suck, making your legs tremble. “...ngh, Mikey…don’t stop…” You begged as you could feel the fire in your core running rampant, it was starting to burn through your coil, you were teetering on the edge. You were trying to hold back from screaming but it was like fighting the storm, you were losing all sense and control.

He quickened the pace of his fingers and his tongue. Your hips began to rut against his mouth and fingers, chasing your high as you were being pushed off the edge. “Cum for me, angel…” Mikey said as he lifted his face from between your thighs to look at the blissful expression on your face as you came undone. Your essence coated his fingers and wrist, your angelic moans were like music to his ears. Withdrawing his fingers from your core, he popped them in his mouth and licked the digits clean - you were like a drug addiction to him. He was afraid that without you, he would spiral out of control and burn the world down. You were left breathless aside from the powerful orgasm he gave you, his confession made you bitter and dejected. Staring into the ceiling you were trying to gather your thoughts of what to say. “Angel…?” He knew you were hurting, you looked for him day and night, you wandered the streets like a lost puppy - desperate to find its owner. How could you not be upset? 

Mikey sat up and leaned forward to place kisses on your forehead and cheek - he was asking you to forgive him. The tears that slid down your face were like a punch to the gut, he’s made you cry so many times, how much more would you be able to handle? Reaching out to cup his cheek, you pulled him for a kiss and your essence lingered on his tongue. The kiss was filled with so much yearning and passion, and it was also bittersweet. Your hands began to pull his shirt upwards, signaling your desire and hunger. These amorous feelings were bubbling up inside you the more Mikey fought for dominance with his tongue. There was no hesitation left - both of you rid yourselves of your clothing. The moment you found the opportunity to take control, you seized it, rolling over to straddle his lap. The throbbing of his hardened member underneath you was making you dizzy. Sitting up, you began to grind against his cock - the sounds of your slick and his precum echoed in the room the more your hips put pressure on him. Mikey’s breath hitched when his tip would prod your core, you were teasing him. 

Lifting your hips, you leaned forward to rest your head into the pillow while taking him in slowly. Your legs quivered as your cunt greedily sucked him in. Mikey could feel how your walls fluttered around his length, he began to guide your movements, gently bouncing you on his length. You whimpered as he thrusted upwards to match your pace. His tip kept kissing your cervix as he buried himself deep within your walls. “M-Mikey…promise me…” You began to stutter as he kept grinding your hips against his, making his cock drag mercilessly against your velvet walls. “Promise me t-that…oh god…” Your words kept getting cut off as he rutted harder and faster. Your hands were pressed against his chest for stability, you were drowning and trying to keep your head above water. “Fuck! Promise me y-you won't…hah…leave me again…” The more his cock bullied is way into your cunt, the more your words were becoming incoherent. Only the sound of skin colliding and slick could be heard in the bedroom. 

Your clit was finding friction against him, he knew exactly how to move your body to get your eyes knocking back in white and making you scream. His name bled from your mouth repeatedly as your coil snapped, the sweet sensation of release had your legs quivering and creaming around his cock. Mikey couldn’t hold back after feeling how your walls fluttered and your image above him was divine. He filled your cunt with thick ropes of white. You collapsed on his chest, trying to catch your breath - you could only hear the sounds of your hearts beating and nothing else. Everything else was silent, the world seemed to stop moving. “I love you angel…” His words snapped you back into reality. “I love you too Manjiro.” Mikey still had an iron grip on your hips and he began to grind you against him again. “...m’gonna fill you up some more angel…” The tone in his voice had you clenching around his length making his cum drip out. You mewled as his cock kept dragging through your abused walls. “Mhn…” Mikey hummed as his hot seed dripped out of you and pooled between both of you. “I shouldn’t have let you go (Y/N)....” 

While still being buried inside of you, he managed to roll you both over so that he was now on top. His hips thrusted slowly, back and forth - he leaned back to see how his cock split you open. The milky white slick that coated his length made him want to keep you filled with his cum until you give him a little Manjiro of his own. Your hands roamed the valley of your chest to bring attention to your breasts. The way your fingers pinched and rolls the sensitive buds made Mikey dizzy - to see you touching yourself while he’s fucking you, it was electrifying. Sparks were  beginning to form between the both of you when he threw your leg over his shoulder. He was determined to go deeper and fuck his cum back into your pussy. “Play with yourself angel…” He demanded as the fire in your eyes burned brighter when he pulled your hand away from your nipple and on to your clit. You did as you were told, but the moment your eyes began to close - Mikey snatched your chin and tiled it in his direction. “...keep your eyes on me (Y/N).” He began to snap his hips harder, his grunts and moans were bringing you closer to the edge. Your fingers were running short and hard circles around your clit, you were desperately fighting to keep your eyes connected with his. The fire in your eyes was starting to make Mikey melt. “Fuck! Mikey I’m-” you moaned out loud and felt the sensation wash over you, making you gush all over his cock and thighs. “S-Shit…gonna fill you up pretty girl…” Mikey stuttered as his motions became more erratic. A few more pumps and he was spilling his second load deep in your womb. 

Both of you were feeling lightheaded and drained (literally). He pulled out and rolled over, landing on his back. He took your hand and brought it up to his lips, placing a kiss on it - “You’re not going anywhere angel…you’re stuck with us until death do us part….” You turned over to look at him in shock. “Mikey, are you asking me to marry you??” The devilish smirk on his face did not prepare you for his next words. “No…you’re married to Bonten now. You’re now our 9th member. You will have a say in our affairs, our choices, our plans, everything…” He was giving you control of your life back in a way. “Do I outrank Sanzu?” You giggled as you rolled over to lay on his chest.

A new chapter in your life has begun. Being Bonten’s 9th member was sure to bring more responsibility and precaution. 

END Part 20

TAGS:

@shinichirosupremacy @bajifairyy @litle-crow @mikariko @buns-inhiding @nekoisme @erza-uzumaki @summerdasy @astrodiamond @nalyana @mjailene15 @minniettokki @lisedanie  @reiners-milkbiddies @rinrinfoxy @bakkatakoyaki @giraffeosaur @stickysaladdonkeyhero @awkwardchick87 @shinouzen @hedaxhoseok @zamfir707

[avatarskywalker78]

AO3 Masterpost

even if we can’t find heaven (i’ll walk through hell with you) - Part 1 of The Shieldmaiden Saga, focusing on Steph Taylor - Eddie’s childhood best friend - as she gains powers from the particle accelerator, and soon finds out she’s not the only one, gaining new friends...and discovering that the accelerator was flawed.

love, you’re not alone (cause I’m gonna stand by you) - Part 2 of The Shieldmaiden Saga and a direct sequel to the above, with Steph Taylor continuing to gather friends, help metas, and build a case against Wells as another meta starts making a name for himself in Central City.

to save the world (with a friend by my side) - Longfic for SyFy’s Krypton, where Adam Strange and his friend Ashley Tanner travel back in time to save Krypton. Currently has 8/11 chapters.

flufftober 2021 - A series of (mostly) short fics I wrote for flufftober 2021, complete at 31 stories.

emerald legacy - An AU spanning from Arrow’s S1 finale, where Oliver was the one who died saving Laurel, not Tommy. In the midst of dealing with Oliver’s death, plus the revelation that Thea’s his sister, Tommy decides to take up Oliver’s mantle. Currently has 2 parts.

of legacies and lies - Alex Thompson, Jack Thompson’s granddaughter, goes on the run after the SHIELDRA reveal, and has to deal with the fact that her entire career in SHIELD has been a lie. Meanwhile Jack and Sarah - his wife - are making sure she’s going to get a fair trial when she reaches the US.

a god’s reflection - Loki’s POV after his initial imprisonment post-Avengers as he thinks about his actions, and regrets that he’ll never really have a chance to make amends because he’ll likely be imprisoned for the rest of his life.

when one door closes (another opens) - On Earth-4 in the 22nd Century, Brianna Thawne (Eddie’s distant descendant and her generation’s Cobalt Blue) takes Sara Lance up on her offer to join the Legends.

now we have (the freedom to choose) - an AU of Legends’ S1 finale. Kendra isn’t the only one dealing with destiny, but Carter too - and since he’s the one who always remembers first, it’s unlikely he’s ever had much chance to be with other people like Kendra has. Featuring a more self-aware Carter and a heart to heart with Sara Lance.

you’ve always been (a part of me) - A Seg/Adam fic set 40 years after Krypton’s S2 finale, where they’ve been together almost as long - and Seg is hit with the realization that he’ll eventually outlive Adam.

speak (and i’ll listen) - a short MonWinn fic set in an AU of Supergirl S2 (the AU being that they’re together, and not Mon and Kara). Winn stresses over not being able to stop Music Meister. Mon does his best to comfort him.

to new beginnings - A Westhallen short fic written for Polyam Shpping Day #14, set in an alternate season 2 and featuring the three of them discussing New Year’s resolutions.

brothers (lost and found) - the first part of Cobalt Blue and The Flash, where Barry Allen and Malcolm Thawne have been best friends for six years, with Barry essentially taking on the role of big brother due to Malcolm’s estrangement from his own brother. When Malcolm gets struck by lightning while trying (and failing) to prevent Barry from suffering the same fate, he wakes up five months later with speedster powers, and unbeknownst to him this changes everything.

doubt (and the bonds of love) -  Another short MonWinn fic, set in an alternate S3 where Mon-El never left Earth. Mon-El has become distant all of a sudden and Winn is determined to find out why.

to live and rise (and hope again) - longfic about Eliana Kent, Clark and Lana’s daughter from an alternate universe, as she experiences a massive power boost, becomes a hero, and joins the DEO, while still dealing with her family’s loss and having to work with two of their counterparts.

the future (is ours) - a short Thallen fic, set in a AU where Iris is the Flash, Eobard got defeated without any casulties, and Barry and Eddie are dating - Eddie second guessing his relationship with Barry after Eobard’s manipulations.

right here (is where i’m meant to be) - A lazy morning Segdam fic set post-canon.

Cobra Kai Mini Rewrites - a series of unnconnected oneshots that are rewrites on certain scenes in the show that annoyed me. Complete at 18 stories.

bad boy (no more) - my collection of Mike Barnes redemption fics, which are all standalone, but have the consistent elements of Mike’s wife Leah and his three children, Sarah, Elaine, and Alex. Currently has 5 stories.

flufftober 2022 - my collection of stories for this year’s flufftober spanning various fandoms. Complete at 21 stories.

the truth (long overdue) - a Spider-Man 2 fix-it fic where Peter actually explains things to Harry instead of rushing off and leaving him alone, and this changes everything.

looking for america (coming through your schools) - the first part of the Nicky Connors, Cobra Adjacent series, which focuses on Nicky Connor’s friendship with the OG Cobras, particulary Johnny. This fic is set on New Year’s Eve 1983, with the six of them reflecting on the year past and being hopeful about 1984.

[inthiseternalmoment]

I dreamed I could connect with Misa finally

I think I went on a journey to reconnect with the kid that was left behind in Neptune Promenade through my projection of Misa. I think it means we’re both going to be ok.

04/22/2024

In this dream I was on my way to a KBBQ/yakiniku get together with a class of sorts but the scheduling had worked out so that I could pick up and drop off Misa before my event.

She was both younger than me like she is now and yet felt as if she was also a young adult at the same time (so maybe I was older than I am now?). When I picked her up, we got to talk a little bit about how her life has been. She felt cautiously cheerful/optimistic. She was preparing for a trip in a few days where she was meeting a good friend of hers and I felt so happy to hear her talk about something she was enjoying about her life.

She still seemed to struggle to talk about herself emotionally but I made sure to prioritize giving her space without pressure. I think it helped.

I arrived at Neptune Promenade (a version of it where each apartment was another reality - basically an infinite number of realities masking itself as a singular apartment building). It was actually another apartment where I was to go to have my class food meetup.

As I dropped her off at one of the units that opened up to a sort of “home” for her, I was able to tuck her in and wish her goodnight. While she was much bigger and older in my dream, she was literally at the same time the same little girl I’ve always known.

I felt like she truly appreciated the gesture of me picking her up and that made me laugh as I made clear to her that it was the highlight of my day getting to talk with her and connect (as short as it may have been).

After I left, she texted me a long text talking about her feelings about our dad and how she felt that at an early age she was really misunderstood and unseen by him. I wasn’t surprised to get this text because she was still at a point where texting was easier for her to communicate her feelings and I was grateful for any communication at all.

I also was overjoyed that I could 100% validate her feelings/experience in my response because I had done the work to recognize my parents for who they were. A past me would have easily made excuses for my parents and would have tried to communicate those excuses to her. It would have come from a place of “love,” of course, but unhealed love that was unwilling to recognize the pain they caused me (and therefore unwilling to recognize Misa’s pain as well).

A past version of me would have taken this honest text from her personally (completely subconsciously), because it would have reflected back to me the hurt child that felt he had to endlessly be understanding of his parents’ shortcomings while never feeling understood himself.

But here I was in the dream, crafting an understanding and validating response to her honest and vulnerable expression of truth. Instead of feeling like my worldview was threatened, I felt my relationship with my sister deepen because I was able to embrace her in this moment where she was holding her hand out for connection.

This dream coming after what was revealed about her the day of the 4/8 eclipse tells me that things will be better eventually. She has emotionally been on my mind and I hope that in spirit I have been able to commune with her and fully see her, and that she has felt that.

…

The setting being this inter dimensional Neptune Promenade (a dream setting I’ve actually been to before) combined with her being older and younger at the same time makes me wonder if she reflects back to me the child I was back in Neptune Promenade. She’s around the age I was back then.

Maybe through connecting with and validating her, I have reached a new milestone doing the same for my inner child. I know he felt unseen and misunderstood by both parents in different ways, and it was like I revisited Neptune Promenade to see him again, this time able to fully hear out his truth, unclouded by my unhealed pain.

[just-random-things-okie]

Just me and my friends

As darkness envelops me, my body lies motionless on the cold concrete. I fear that this may be the end of my life. However, deep down inside, I know that I still have so much potential left within me. Suddenly, I feel someone's grasp, and hope begins to flicker in my heart. Will I make it through, or is this my final moment?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sound of the bell startled me, and suddenly my legs felt weak. To make matters worse, it felt like there was a heavy weight on my back. The school hallways seemed impossibly long, like a giraffe's neck. How was I supposed to make it to class like this?

Just then, my friend Danz approached me. "What are you still doing here?" he asked.

"Dying," I replied solemnly. "Mrs. Charles's class is so boring and..."

"Unbearable?" Danz suggested.

"Yes, that's the word," I nodded. "And on top of that, I can't even walk."

"Well, I could carry you," Danz offered with a smirk. "Don't worry, I'm pretty athletic. I'm on the swimming team, you know."

"That's not the problem," I protested. But before I could say anything else, Danz had scooped me up in his arms and was carrying me toward class.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After Mrs. Charles's class ended, I breathed a sigh of relief and looked forward to lunch. In preschool, I used to eat with Danz, Nicole, and Trice, but now it's just Danz and me. I can't help but miss them as I watch them laughing at a different table with their new friends. It hurts to feel left out.

Danz noticed my mood and asked if I missed them too. I admitted that I did and suggested that we all hang out later like old times. I was excited about the idea, but Danz seemed uninterested at first. I emphasized that I wasn't kidding, and my enthusiasm caused me to raise my voice. Suddenly, I realized that Nicole and Trice were looking at me. Wait not just them but the whole cafeteria.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I was very committed to my plan, so, during Mrs. Dickens' class, I made a detailed schedule. We would pick them up at 6 o'clock, then eat at our favorite diner, The Davi's Diner, at 6:30. Next, we would play mini-golf at 7:30 and ride our motorcycle at 8:30, just like in the old days. After school, I showed the plan to Danz, who initially seemed doubtful. However, with some convincing, he eventually agreed to the plan. I was feeling quite excited at that time.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

At 5:45, I made plans with Danz to pick up Nicole while I picked up Trice. I maintained a serious demeanor as I asked if everything was clear. Danz responded with a salute and a confirmation that it was, indeed, clear. After sharing a laugh, I headed out to pick up Nicole.

Admittedly, I missed Nicole more than Trice. It's hard to explain, but I felt happier with her around. I even dreamt about kissing her, but it was purely platonic. I can't have a crush on her, can I?

I arrived at her front door, my nerves getting the best of me as I raised my fist to knock. After a few failed attempts, her mother answered the door with a bright smile. I politely asked for Nicole, and her mother summoned her to come down. As she left to buy groceries, I settled onto the couch, happy to see Nicole again after so long.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

As she walked in, I couldn't tell if she was annoyed or happy. My nerves got the best of me, and I hesitated to say anything. Finally, she settled onto the couch and asked, "Hi, Ron, what brings you here?"

I stuttered out a response, "Well, Danz and I were wondering if you would like to hang out with us. Me, you, Danz, and Nicole." Her phone was set aside, and she smiled at me.

I gathered my courage to finish, "We've grown apart since starting high school, and I..."

Before I could continue, she cut me off with a smirk. "Miss us? Do you guys both have a crush on us?"

I couldn't bring myself to admit it, so I responded, "Well, no. We just want to hang out, you know, like old times." She seemed convinced and agreed to come.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We all initially gathered at Davi’s Diner, where we sat in silence. None of us spoke a word, and it seemed like our mouths were sealed shut. This was the case when we first met each other.

We all met during our preschool days. Since all the tables were taken, we had no choice but to sit with each other. There was a void between us, and any slight movement would cause one to fall. We felt the same way then as we do now.

I was eager to talk, and Danz cleared his throat as if he was about to say something. He was the one who spoke first when we first met, and he did so again now. He talked about video games, which I don't usually like discussing. However, I was relieved that we were talking about something.

Thanks to video games, we bonded once more after some time. We owe it all to video games.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After finishing our meal, we headed to the mini golf course and had a great time. As usual, Danz and Trice were bickering while Nicole and I patiently waited for our turn. "Looks like they're having another lover's quarrel," Nicole whispered to me. I chuckled and replied, "Sorry to disappoint, but Danz and I are married." Nicole laughed and joked, "Well, I thought someday I'd marry you." I felt my heart racing and didn't know how to respond. Did she just confess her feelings for me? She noticed my reaction and laughed it off. Danz and Nicole noticed the exchange and shared a grin. "Let's all go for a motorcycle ride!" Danz suggested, and everyone agreed. I felt relieved that we were all going to spend time together.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danz had a smirk on his face as he said, "You and Nicole, while Trice and I go together. Clear?" I hesitated and replied, "No, I'm sorry. My heart is still racing like a hummingbird." Danz seemed amused and asked, "So your heart beats at 70, no, 80 per second?" I shrugged and replied, "That's what I tell myself." Danz then raised his voice and addressed the girls, "All right, ladies. I'll be going with Nicole and Ron will go with Trice." The decision was made.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“You have a crush on Nicole, right?” Trice said with a grin

“No, I don’t” I protested

“If you won’t admit it I will drive and you’ll be my passenger,” Trice said

“No, I’ll drive. Besides I don’t have a crush on her, all right?” But before I finish she was already on the motorcycle waiting for me to ride it. I have no choice but to obey her. “Fine, you’ll drive” Before I got to Trice accidentally forward the motor causing me to fall and fell to my head.

As darkness envelops me, my body lies motionless on the cold concrete. I fear that this may be the end of my life. However, deep down inside, I know that I still have so much potential left within me. Suddenly, I feel someone's grasp, and hope begins to flicker in my heart. Will I make it through, or is this my final moment?

The hand that grabs me is Nicole’s. “Open your eyes, you're not that badly hurt” She’s trying not to laugh and so does Danz.

“I’m sorry,” Trice said looking at me like a child.

“It’s fine,” I said trying to assure Trice I’m okay

“stop being dramatic” Danz announced “Me and Ron will go together and you two can go with each other.”

All of us agreed and we all sent off.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Danz and I were riding together while Nicole and Trice were riding separately. As I locked eyes with Nicole, Danz, and Trice were riding at the same pace and we ended up side by side. I couldn't help but feel like a fairy, with a smile that I didn't want to hide.

[innerpeacebarbarian]

opinions on the Geats cast now and what are your hopes for the endgame.

I'd think that Ace is a good example of how making someone mysterious while being also an active player in the story. His mystery is compelling and personally is a good hook to the story, though the series starts to really get into that midway, with early on his presence isn't felt by some, thinking that other Riders feel more like main.

Personality wise, I think he's an example of being arrogant without looking down on others, unlike people such as Tendou or Tsukasa, though he can still seem insufferable. Thought at first he's more Sento or Haruto type, until ep. 8 of which it's shown that he's more ruthless type like Tendou and Tsukasa, not that it's not unexpected.

His abilities are showcased well and entertaning, in his battle capabilities and skills in battlefield, or his abilities to turn things into his favor without feeling out of place, as everything is nicely set up, like the "asspull" of Boost Mark II from his previous reincarnation's wishes, though I personally not a fan of his ep. 1 fight much of charging with guns.

---

Some of the boy scout type of characters have the writing only focusing on them being good to others alone, but at least for Keiwa, it's addressed as something problematic that he lacks aspirations, which is something to look forward in how he can grow from that. It actually can causes him to be unwittingly inconsiderate on what's good for others in their lives, and the show actually addressed that as something faulty for him.

Eventually he developed into understanding that everyone has a right to make their own wishes and cling into it in how important it can be, while he has more clear goal but doesn't mean straying away from his helpful nature, reviving the Riders who died in the game due to not liking seeing them dying.

He's a tanuki and thus he should be a trickster, like Ace. And it eventually happened in the show when he tricked Girori into exposing himself and I'm glad for that. But I also would want to see more of that, becoming something more consistent of him (but not underhanded) particularly when the show sets him up as Daichi the schemer's main enemy.

---

In the first episode Neon seems similar to victim of the week, though ofc promoted as a Rider, but I began to feel that there's an effort in writing her for her first 2 parter in ep. 3-4, in how her home life is depicted and shot in the series. I like that her development in that episode stays consistent that she stays a capable fighter, though it's less prevalent nowadays as her along with Keiwa lacks upgrades for now.

Not a bad thing, but her arc later also resembles some of the KR franchise's staples, like her learning the circumstances between how she's made into a Rider being a pawn for others (nepotism, and unknowingly Kousei wants to have her marry future people), and how she has an existensial crisis over her origins (which happens to many other major girl characters in KR franchise). Something I like though is that, her depression doesn't immediately end after Beroba's doxxing, she's still processing through it.

---

I like how in the series, Michinaga's attitude is portrayed as a shortcoming, with him actually being held back from it, for something like, being a hostile loner or a buffalo who makes rash decisions and is stubborn, with other characters also calling him out for it. I'd also rather if Beroba gets more credit in his victory over the JGP too.

I also think his character has been consistent, in how his callousness steers him, where he's established as thriving over Riders' predicaments and deaths, and not giving a damn about civilians, of which him having more standards as a DGP player isn't done due to caring for them, but to not make himself similar to the Riders who left Toru for dead (albeit he has been hypocritical), and later when needed, he'd have no qualms attacking or murdering Riders, or even some civilians, it's not him being corrupted by Jamato Buckle or such. He just didn't care, and if he has good intentions, it's solely end justifies the means type.

I'd also think that his sense of honor play contrasts Ace, of which while a dirty player, Ace looks out for people more and is genuine in helping them. Michinaga has a code of honor, and will punish the Riders whose cruelty, like his views towards them, is clear in his eyes like Morio and Daichi, but it only diminishes his cruelty like, "I'd want to dispose someone in upfront way, not in backstabbing way", and he oftentimes still doesn't act to stop that cruelty, leaving them be, like when Beroba doxxes Neon.

---

I thought Tsumuri has rather small screentime and presence, outside of the 2nd DGP, kinda like... Sophia in Saber, though it doesn't damage the series, and that she's getting more recently. Even moreso for Sara, who obviously, gets more recently as Hakubi.

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Niram is an interesting and charismatic higher up with his antics and worldview, by contrast Girori feels wooden and he lacks foresight in his actions. Chirami is even worse with him being utterly dumb though it's an intentional part of the story rather than unnoticed. Win is a fun adversary, though he feels less competent than he lets on IMO, and has tragic parts, dunno how they're taking his direction now. Samas has the worst lack of presence IMO, only revolving around Niram.

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The supporters are all screwed up due to how future life is, though they get believable development, with Ziin learning the value of life, and Kyuun learning to vocalize his feelings. Not yet for Kekera now. Beroba is an effective and competent villain who is used well to be threatening, and she's not kidding in how much she wants to see misery.

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There are perhaps wasted extra Riders with how easily they're dying. Would say for eariler villains Kanato serves as a good contrast for Neon, and Morio moves Keiwa and Michinaga's characters forward. Ittetsu's character is all about his age, including in the reason he protects people. Sae feels like bringing girls rule boys drool though her last moments with Neon is nice. Daichi feels wasted though despite his extended screentime, him joining the Jamato is useless though he had a successful plan, and his demise is just a repeat of Morio's.

[kdt3al]

Confession - I'm a piece of shit.

TLDR: I was very depressed, got drunk and kissed a new friend. Partner called off our engagement because of it. I messaged this friend inappropriately and nearly destroyed mine and Partner's relationship because of it. I have no friends, and my depression is getting bad again.

I was engaged last year, but then I got drunk and kissed a friend. A few months later, I was messaging this friend inappropriately. My partner found out and told me to stop, but I continued. I'll admit, I loved the kind of attention I got from this guy. I hadn't had THAT kind of attention for a long time.

The way this guy LOOKED at me, I felt like I was the only person in the world. I've never had anyone look at me that way, making me feel so special.

My partner's giving me my last chance. I know I was lucky to have 1 more chance, let alone another one. My partner kicked me out of our house and said I couldn't come back until I'd said goodbye to my friend. I miss him. I keep wanting to tell him things that have happened during my day.

It's no excuse, I just want to give some of my thoughts on why I did what I did.

I've had maybe 2 friends since I left school nearly 10 years ago. I met A 4 years after I left school, and D about 8 years after I left school. I can no longer speak to D, as this was the friend. My partner had a few years without any close friends, but he's had A and Z for around 5 years now, as well as a few others he chats with regularly. A no longer wants to be my friend and has chosen to only be friends with Partner.

My partner's family are quite close, but mine are not. I don't see my family very often, and we don't talk much other than when we need to. My partner plays online games with his brothers every now and then and sees most of his family at work.

I had a baby in 2021, and I felt so alone. None of my family came to help me, and when they did visit they just wanted to see the baby. Partner's family didn't really visit either, his mum wanted to come around all the time, and even let herself in without asking or knocking.

I had 9 months off of work, in total. I was so bored at home alone, but my anxiety wouldn't let me go outside. (Partner resents me for not taking Baby outside more.) Eventually, A dragged me out of the house to go to a baby/toddler group with him. I enjoyed it, but then I was stuck going with A's partner. I didn't really get on with her, and I always felt like she didn't like me that much. That might've been my anxiety talking, but I didn't realise that at the time.

All the time I spent inside just me and Baby caused my depression to get worse and worse. I started having thoughts of hurting myself and realised I probably needed to talk to someone. I spoke to the Health Visitor, and they set me up an appointment to talk to someone about Post Partum Depression. I went through their assessment and was told I was fine. "You're a new mum, you'll be fine."

My depression got worse and worse. It only started to lift when I started talking to D. He seemed to know what I was going through depression-wise, and mental health-wise. I felt like I had someone I could talk to, I didn't feel like I could confide in my partner. How do you tell someone you love that you don't want to be here anymore?

I think I want some advice on what I should do?

I don't have any friends I can talk to, I'm trying to get in contact with some old friends from school but no one really seems to want to reconnect. It's always meeting for a coffee "someday" and then never hearing back. I've tried Bumble and Peanut to find new friends nearby, but people don't seem to reply on those apps very often.

I keep wanting to message D, I miss him as a friend. We'd play games on Steam together, go for walks, and have a laugh. I felt like I'd found a best friend finally after 10 years. We took things too far and I regret that drunken kiss that started it all. Partner wants us to have nothing to do with D ever again, he thinks D wanted to destroy our relationship and steal me away. I don't think that, but part of me wonders if maybe I wanted that in a way?

Partner wants to go through my phone regularly now, and I can't blame him. He says he can't trust me, I'm trying to earn his trust again. Neither of us is sure how to do that yet. He says he's single now but says he wants to work on the relationship, and he still wants sex and to "use" me. Partner told me A said, "You better not get back with her unless it's just for the sex."

I'm in counselling for my mental health, Partner says it's "too little, too late". Counsellor says I should write Partner a letter because actual face-to-face conversations spike my anxiety. Told Partner this, and he said "You can write one, but I might not read it or believe anything you write." He says he can't trust what I say anymore. My counsellor says I deserve to be happy, and that even though I don't feel like it now, things will get better. I hope that's true.

I miss having D as a friend. I want my family (Me, Partner, Baby) to stay together. I want my anxiety and depression to lighten. I want to be happy.