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#was there a worse place to leave off? literally no
gloveslut · 2 days
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oda died. chuuya has no idea.
babe, i'm back. ... hey, what's going on?
i'm leaving.
you're what? 'samu, did something happen?
stop fucking using that tone. or my name.
what the fuck? can you explain?
explain what?
everything?!
you knew it was only a matter of time. i don't know why you act surprised.
you don't wanna talk about it?
no.
...where to?
none of your business.
but osa- listen, you swore you wouldn't- ever-
i didn't swear shit to mafia.
...fuck no. that's not how you talk to me, you fucking piece of shit.
get off of me.
you're leaving me too! you swore shit to me!
you're nothing more than one of my mistakes.
i know you're lying, fuck, what's gotten into you?
i'm not lying, i can't bear even looking at you now.
but why? dazai, it's unfair to-
oh, and you're always fair to me? i know you're seeing someone else.
...who? tell me who told you that and i'll rip them apart, because it's fucking bullshit.
you're bullshit. all of you. it's your nature. quit playing the victim.
this is ridiculous-
and what are you gonna do about it? beg for me to stay? again? aren't you tired?
you know what? i am. because saying shit like that out of blue is too low, even for you.
i need to pack my things, get out of my-
who's blood is that? the hell is-
mine! it's mine cause i felt uneasy! stop sniffing around, you're not helping!
this doesn't look like- like- you know, there's too much of it, dazai, i don't understand-
you don't need to understand, chuuya, please, stop trying to get closer. you're not special. i'm not gonna take you with me so we can run off into the sunset.
but you can't do it completely on your own, god, are you even here with me?
i'm the one thinking critically right now. i can get killed otherwise, and i'm not gonna be alone.
...you can't just throw it at me like that. can i at least know when it started?
when what started?
well, your falling out? i guess i should've seen it coming with the way you hated introducing me to literally anyone.
i'm not here to fight about it with you.
but you accused me of cheating first thing i came in, idiot!-
i'm not- i was talking about him.
who? ...odasaku? ... fuck, i'm sorry for assuming- whatever, you do realise he's not gonna be here for you forever?
...chuuya, please.
i'm not trying to scare you off and obviously i'm not any better but-
please stop. some... people were here, but they left, and it's not so bad. it's gonna be fine and we're gonna find the best place to hide, i don't care what you think of it, we're gonna be- fine-
honey... i didn't mean to make it worse, it's o-
no it's not! you know nothing about me or my friends, i'm begging you- just- fuck off-
i know it's hard and-
don't touch me! ... god, just go away.
...so you mean it.
yes. i fucking do. now leave. you can get suicidal and stick around this burnt house as long as you want later.
...fuck you. i can't stand you anymore.
oh yeah? news to me.
yeah, cause i fucking loved you! i put everything i had eating me from inside away and stayed with you up untill this point. i made my whole life evolve around you. jesus, i even grew my hair for you!
uh-huh.
and guess what! i never fucking liked it this way. i barely got anything out of whatever we had going on. you didn't even wanna give it a name. cause i'd eat it up. and i did.
right.
fuck, dazai, can't you have a heart for a minute?
yeah no, not around someone who thinks of me as crazy, but thanks.
i don't- what the fuck are you talking about?
all the... nice treatment you gave me was always based purely on the fact that i'm fucking broken and that you should fix me. not only it's incredibly fucked up, you also just can't. you always play god here and there but you don't carry the power of one, not even close.
now, i didn't even-
chuuya, please. i'm asking kindly. i can easily get it over with, but i don't think it'd be either rational or pleasant for you.
...just like this?
yeah. just like this. if you can't accept that you're not needed, then you earn all the hostility. i'm done with all this shit. let us both finally have peace. ... that look doesn't exactly evoke peaceful feelings in me.
i... i have so much to say, to- to ask before- and there's not enough time- huh, it seems like it's never the time. i don't know if i should waste my chance, though.
i mean, if you realise how useless all of our conversations ever were...
...
woah. okay. ... one last question.
if you promise to never talk to me again, go on.
...did you- it's hard not to- ...well, i know someone died. i just have to know, are you the cause?
yes and no. unfortunately, i didn't get to kill anyone this time. but i'm also at fault. great one. i'm at hurry. so may i be excused? ... you better not show up in my life later on. not necessarily because you're so distractive, it's just the way it- it has to be. have fun around here, but be cautious. you never know where your line's gonna end. or when you're gonna lose someone. i guess it would be even more heartbreaking to you, 'normal people'.
wait, are you saying-
i thought you stopped bothering me. ...nevermind. do whatever you want.
i can't believe you're doing this to me.
please, move.
dazai- baby, i was only trying to-
now, you shut it and let me go or i'll slit your throat with this shiny thing. ... cool. oh, and... your letters or anything like that will never reach me. we have nothing to discuss. nothing that is worth the effort. i also think you said everything you wanted to. ...thank you- for, uh, not whining too much. see you in hell.
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gyubakeries · 1 day
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your work is so so sooo good. you write angst and fluff so well wow. could i please request a similar drabble with seungkwan? any plot is great, just the same loving doting boyfriend as in your seungcheol drabble
𝗯𝗮𝗻𝗱-𝗮𝗶𝗱 | b.sk
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a/n: hi anon! im so glad you liked the seungcheol drabble <3 thanks for requesting this!! kwan is so bf material... this wasnt really hard to write lmaoo. hope you like this!
word count: 2.2k contents: seungkwan x afab!reader , idol!seungkwan , waitress!reader , domestic fluff , mentions of injury (just a small cut) , a little angst , but we get comfort so thank you kwan , set right after nana tour , seungkwan being a pro-nagger
"y/n, just go home," your co-worker, hyeri, sighs. "i'll cover for you."
"i'm fine, hyeri," you shake your head, continuing to wipe down the empty tables.
"you look dead from the lack of sleep," hyeri counters, taking the cleaning rag away from you. "i could see those dark circles under your eyes from miles away."
"are you telling me i look like a panda?" you gasp, and hyeri shoots you an unimpressed look.
"go home, or i'm calling seungkwan up," hyeri threatens, and your eyes widen at the mention of your boyfriend's name.
"are you crazy? don't say that out loud! you never know when someone is listening!" you whisper-yell. dating an idol from a famous kpop group was a tough job, especially when their fans could be lurking anywhere.
"there's literally no one here," hyeri points out. "because it's closing time. now go home before i kick your ass."
"but-"
"non negotiable," hyeri cuts you off. "you've closed every night for the last two weeks, so let me do it now. go home and get some rest, y/n. i'm worried about you."
your shoulders slump. you hated that hyeri had to do your job, but a tiny part of you felt relieved to be going home and finally getting some shut-eye.
"thank you so much, i'll treat you to lunch soon," you say. "at the expensive hot-pot place you like."
hyeri squeals with excitement, and you can only smile at her antics before heading out to the back of the restaurant, grabbing your things, and leaving for the day.
it's almost midnight by the time you're stepping into your apartment. you immediately head into your bedroom to put your phone on charge, it having died sometime during the day while you were working. you quickly go into the bathroom to take a shower, eager to get clean and finally hit the bed, unaware of the text messages lighting up your screen while you shower.
once you're dressed in comfortable clothes, you tuck yourself into bed. you wait for sleep to claim you as soon as your head hits the pillow, but..... it doesn't.
you lie awake, staring at the ceiling blankly. you feel so tired, but your eyes refuse to shut. the frustration overwhelms you, threatening to make unshed tears spill from your eyes. just when you thought things couldn't get worse, your stomach starts rumbling loudly.
groaning because of this unfair situation the universe decided to put you in when all you wanted was to sleep, you get out of bed and walk into the kitchen, hoping to make some ramen for yourself.
you open the cupboard to fetch some instant ramen after putting a pot of water on the stove to boil. while waiting for the water, you take out an egg and some green onion from your fridge.
the ramen noodles go into the water and you take out a knife to chop up some green onions, just to be fancy. just then, a wave of tiredness washes over you, making your eyelids droop.
you yawn, carelessly cutting the green onion. a combination of your exhaustion and your vision blurring with tears as you yawn again makes you miscalculate where your knife lands, and in the blink of an eye, there's a gash on your index finger, bright red blood oozing out of it.
"shit!" you exclaim, rushing to the kitchen sink to run some cold water over your finger. in your panic, you barely register the door to your apartment opening and your boyfriend walking in.
"y/n! i'm ho- shit, what happened?" seungkwan gasps, seeing you hunched over the kitchen sink. he rushes to you, dropping his bag to the floor. he nearly screams too when he sees the cut on your finger and the blood spilling from it.
"wait here, i'll get the first-aid kit," he snaps into action, but you stop him.
"switch the stove off, or the next mess we'll have to clean is the ramen," you instruct, pointing at the ramen bubbling dangerously on the stove.
seungkwan does as you say, and then rushes into the bedroom to find the first-aid kit. he's back in the kitchen in no time, holding a box of band-aids, some cotton, and.... a sharpie?
the cotton turns out to be drenched in warm water, which he uses to clean the wound gently. he then takes a band-aid out of the box and carefully wraps it around your finger, making sure to cover the cut entirely. and then comes the role of the sharpie.
seungkwan pulls the injured finger closer to him and takes off the cap of the marker. his eyebrows furrow with concentration as he brings the pen to the band-aid, drawing something onto it.
when he releases your finger, you see that he's drawn the face of a puppy onto the band-aid. your heart melts.
"kwan, that's so cute!" you squeal, momentarily forgetting about whatever had just happened. and also the fact that your boyfriend was an expert at nagging.
"yah, y/n, don't you think you should be more careful?" seungkwan scolds lightly. "what if the cut was deeper? or your finger got chopped off? what if i hadn't come home at that time? you didn't even know i was going to come! do you know how worried i was when you didn't read my texts?"
your smile is quickly replaced by a frown, and you suddenly feel tired again. seungkwan notices the abrupt change in your mood, and immediately feels bad for scolding you.
"babe, i'm sorry," he apologizes, coming closer to you to take your hands in his. "i was just really worried, you know?"
you only nod in response. you weren't upset because of seungkwan, but because of how pathetic and monotonous your life had become over the last few weeks.
"y/n, talk to me," seungkwan tries, not liking the distant look in your eyes. he could also tell that you were tired from your pale and sullen face. "is everything okay?"
his concerned tone feels like a hug to all the turmoil in your head, and that prompts the first few tears to escape your eyes. you look up at seungkwan, and his distressed expression only upsets you more, making you sob louder.
seungkwan doesn't hesitate for a second, pulling you against his chest in a warm embrace. you inhale deeply, taking in the scent of his cologne that never fails to soothe you.
"how about we lay down?" seungkwan suggests after a while. you nod again, so he carefully guides the both of you towards your bedroom, gently pulling you down next to him on the bed, his arms never leaving your waist.
"do you want to talk about what's been bothering you? was it what i said?" seungkwan asks once your sobs had reduced to sniffles.
"i'm tired." you state. it's the truth, but it's far more complex than just tiredness.
"of course you are. not sleeping for a week does that to people," seungkwan replies in a matter-of-factly tone.
"how did you know that?" you ask, genuinely surprised.
"hyeri texted me earlier. i would have gone to pick you up after your shift, but my dance practice was still on," he answers. "so, what's been up with you? missed me so much you couldn't sleep?"
he said it as a joke, but the words strike a sensitive spot.
"i did," you answer truthfully. "i missed you a lot. it felt like hell without you. and i'm used to months of not seeing you, but this time we couldn't even text because you were busy filming, and it's ridiculous of me to complain about it because it's literally your job, but i missed you a lot. i tried sleeping but i couldn't. not without you texting me a stupid meme vernon sent you before nagging at me to go to sleep. not without you there to hold me. it was torture, kwan."
seungkwan's eyes widen slightly at your rant. he knew long distance was tough, and you two had been through a lot together, but he knew something else was bothering you. you weren't the type to break down this easily.
"i missed you too, babe," seungkwan sighs, pulling you closer to him. "i hated not being able to see your face, especially after i promised to meet you after i came back from japan."
"it's okay, kwannie, i understand," you knew that seungkwan himself wasn't aware of the surprise trip to italy, so you can't really blame him. he also needed that week-long break, especially after having worked so hard.
"thank you, love," seungkwan mutters into your hair, his fingers gently massaging your scalp to alleviate some tension. "but there's something else that's troubling you. i noticed that you were always worrying about something for a few months. you seemed aloof, and i tried to bring it up, but there was never time. what's up?"
"i feel like i'm stuck," you explain. "my life isn't moving forward. it's the same routine of go to work, clean tables, serve food, come home and do chores, and then repeat. i've wanted to do so much more, but i'm just stuck here."
seungkwan's heart breaks at the exhaustion in your voice. you had told him about how you've always wanted to have your own restaurant, which was the only reason you were working in a restaurant yourself.
"babe, it's okay to feel tired sometimes," he comforts you. "there are times when even i feel like i'm stuck in a rut. go to the studio to record, practice room to practice choreo, attend interviews, and repeat it all again. at the start, even i had doubted getting myself into this career, but i realized how deep my passion for music was, which is why i stayed. and the members too, of course."
"i know you love food and cooking, so just stick to your passion. don't give up on it. your big break will come one day. plus, you know mingyu and i will gladly fund your restaurant. you just have to ask, baby."
seungkwan's words have this ability to heal all your wounds. they're like a soothing balm to your sore body, and you're so thankful to have such a caring and loving person in your life.
"if i start my restaurant, i want to do it myself," you crack a small smile. "you're always free to help with the interior design, though."
"thank god, your interior choices are.... questionable," seungkwan teases.
"hey! you can't say that to me!" you pout, but seungkwan doesn't relent.
"seriously? do i have to remind you of that hideous statue of a chihuahua you bought? because you thought it was cute?" he challenges, raising an eyebrow at you.
"it was cute, okay?" you say defensively. "plus, i gave it away because you refused to enter my apartment if it stayed!"
"there was nothing cute about that abomination," seungkwan shudders. "it was a chihuahua wearing red pants and an orange bow-tie. anyways, my point is still valid. i'd be glad to help you design your restaurant."
"thank you, kwan," you smile, leaning up to kiss him. "you always know what to say to make me feel better. how do you do it?"
"i'm magical, baby," seungkwan shoots an over-exaggerated wink at you, making you burst into laughter. "can i say something even better? i'll get all the members to come to your restaurant and we'll post it on our instagram. that kind of publicity would boost your restaurant to the big leagues instantly."
"sure, baby, you can bring all the guys," you nod, endeared by how enthusiastic seungkwan was. you've had a lot of people doubting your plans for your future career as it had bleak prospects, but having seungkwan by your side had reassured you to follow your dreams. he had never lost faith in you, even on days when you yourself gave up on your goals, and it had motivated you to a great extent.
"you've been by my side through everything, y/n," seungkwan whispers softly, looking into your eyes with nothing but adoration and love. "i can't wait to see you grow and become the brightest star too. i'll be there by your side, just like you've been there for me."
"seungkwan- i-" you're at a loss for words. his words are so genuine, and you really don't know what you'd done in your past life to have someone love you so entirely. "i don't even know what to say."
"maybe start with, 'oh my god, seungkwan, you're the best boyfriend ever!' or maybe even 'you're so cute it makes me want to cook my special ramen for you.' any one of those works really," seungkwan says cheekily, and you playfully slap his chest, followed by a loud yawn from the both of you.
"let's have ramen for breakfast tomorrow," you mumble sleepily.
"i gave you another option...." seungkwan sulks jokingly, making you laugh.
"oh my god, seungkwan, you're the best boyfriend ever!" you giggle, speaking in a shrill voice to sound like one of the many fans who fawn over seungkwan. humming with satisfaction, seungkwan presses a loud smooch to your forehead, squeezing you tightly, and then releasing you. your bodies never stray too far away though, always closely intertwined with each other.
and when you wake up the next morning, well-rested and to the sound of seungkwan singing along to girl group songs in the living room while cleaning, you forget about everything that had been weighing you down.
the band-aid on your finger covered the wound on your finger that healed slowly, and seungkwan's love was the band-aid on your heart, healing something he never broke.
- fin.
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fingertipsmp3 · 1 year
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I love reading because you’ll be like “okay let me just finish this chapter and then I’ll get some work done” and at the end of the chapter in question the main character gets sealed into a tomb against his will
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kavehater · 2 months
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Chappel Roan saying she’s sad she’s demisexual and then there’s me being aroace as a whole like don’t you think I’m even more sad 😭
#not saying she’s not allowed to feel sad at all#just makes me think about myself LOL#I hate being aroace it’s like everyone’s part of a secret club I will never be a part of#and that people don’t tend to understand and if they do they never uphold that fact#like I actually have thrown up before from the concept of being in a relationship because it’s horrifying#and disgusting to me in a practical sense#like I don’t want to throw up every time I start thinking about those things I just want to be normal#and not panic like a relationship sounds like even worse than a death sentence#ppl think aroace is cute and problem free but it’s literally so uncomfortable and inconvenient when you’re in a world which a) doesn’t#understand wth aroace is b) doesn’t respect it at all c) has shit povs on what friendship is and how it can be more fulfilling than somethin#and d) how badly it impacts some ;-; like ik it sounds easy but try telling yourself omg I want to have a forever bestie#but then said forever bestie will never end up truly putting you first because they’d have a partner who will be their number one#and as usual you won’t even be second place you will be last like always#because I’ve noticed that the moment ppl get a partner suddenly they become their forever bestie role and then I can’t have that cause it#freaks me out and disgusts me all at once so I’m literally just cursed with forever feeling lonely and not meaning anywhere near as much to#someone who you wish could even look your way the way you do to them …#honestly by the day these reminders make me feel more and more aplatonic but it’ll simultaneously always feel like a hole in my heart#because apparently being aroace is like being some weird person and some freak#and not in the 𝒻𝓇ℯ𝒶𝓀𝓎 type of connotation LMAO I mean just plain freak#and then that loneliness will always accumulate and accumulate and accumulate until I physically cannot handle it anymore or I take matters#into my own hands and just off with her head to myself LMAO#dora daily#and that is why despite aroace being cool to me it’s just not placed in an environement which makes it cool#as those assholes tend to say oh meh meh meh you never struggled girl … we’re in the 21st century every person in the lgbt community is#living the life dating who they want and being with who they want#but allegedly it is but a crime I can’t like anyone and that nobody fucking listens to me when I say I have an attraction deficit#and that they take it upon their hands to define what I’m attracted to or head canon me as whatever they are#I swear I’m not even fucking worth that shit just leave me alone 😭#I promise like if I was with somebody they will regret the day they were born by being with me LOL I am not all that in fact me being aroace#is saving them from torture ☠️ anyways ! rant over :3
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helpimstuckinafandom · 6 months
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Davina Claire is allowed to commit mass murder if she ever so desires. As a treat.
#the things y'all have done to this girl#after everything getting her SHUNNED from the witch community was the answer? really marcel? (and vincent)#she didn't even want this shit in the first place. wanted nothing to do with the covens.#then she was convinced into it because NO ONE wanted the position#then people were pissed she was regent. DESPITE THE FACT NO ONE ELSE WANTED THE POSITION#her best chance at bringing kol back gets hijacked#she follows marcel's advice for proving power by force by instructing for ONE witch to be killed. who had already made a move on davina#ten witches are instead killed (unfortunate but not davina's plan. she feels immense guilt even)#(and this is the only thing that's like... yeah fair if the witches don't want her after that)#but she doesn't continue on this vengeful murder path. she extends an olive branch to the witches suspicious of her (fair that they don't -#- accept but she's working on repsiring shit)#the this vamoire secret society (cult) wants her. and marcel and vincent's plan to make sure she can't be used by them#is to trick her to admit what she did to the witches so that she is cut off from the ancestors and completely excommunicated#to the point where she can't even buy shit from witches in the quarter#WE LEAVE HER ALONE FOR LIKE FOUR EPISODES#she's living in that attic she wanted to escape so bad#and now she's gonna join the vampire cults personal coven because she has no other community and it's the only method she has to res kol#like good fucking job guys. your work to make sure the vamp cult couldn't potentially pressure her to do shit for them#has given her no choice but to be permanently on retainer for them#AND VINCENT GOT COERCED BY THE VAMP CULT TO DO WHAT THEY NEEDED FUCKING ANYWAY#haven't seen a witch this mistreated since bonnie bennett#and it's almost worse cause unlike vampire diaries everyone except davina is an adult#(whereas bonnie wasn't the only teenager and she aged along with the others)#so davina's age is felt way more. and the way she is used and manipulated by everyone is just that much more awful#literally only one who actually gives her supoort is josh. and he's also a teenager (and more recently vamped)#and even then#the originals#davina claire#((i'm only around halfway through s3))
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lamentablesbian · 1 year
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moving out (take 2) tomorrow 💃💃💃 let’s go!
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soon-palestine · 6 months
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Hostages tortured to death. Parents executed in front of their children. Doctors beaten. Babies murdered. Sexual assault weaponised. No, not Hamas crimes. This is part of an ever-growing list of documented atrocities committed by Israel in the five months since 7 October – quite separate from the carpet bombing of 2.3 million Palestinians in Gaza and a famine induced by Israel’s obstruction of aid. And yet while the western establishment media has been chock full of the most lurid allegations of savagery directed against Hamas, sometimes with little or no supporting evidence, Israeli atrocities are excused or quickly forgotten. Accusations against Hamas are endlessly reheated to paint a picture of a supremely dangerous and bestial militant group, in turn rationalising the slaughter and starvation of Gaza’s population to “eradicate” it as a terrorist organisation. But equally barbarous atrocities committed by Israel – not in the heat of battle, but in cold blood – are treated as unfortunate, isolated incidents that cannot be connected, that paint no picture, that reveal nothing of import about the military that carried them out. If Hamas’ crimes were so savage and sadistic they still need to be reported months after they took place, why does the establishment media never feel the need to express equal horror and indignation at equivalent or worse acts of cruelty and sadism being inflicted by Israel on Gaza – not five months ago, but right now? Israel's torture of doctors, its sexual assaults of Palestinian women, it's leaving premature babies to die after its forces stormed a hospital. Where is the outrage? This is part of a pattern of behaviour by the western media that leads to only one possible deduction: Israel’s five-month-long attack on Gaza is not being reported. Rather, it is being selectively narrated – and for the most obscene of purposes. Through consistent and glaring failures in their coverage, establishment media – including supposedly liberal outlets, from the BBC and CNN to the Guardian and New York Times – have smoothed the way for Israel to carry out mass slaughter in Gaza, what the World Court has assessed as plausibly a genocide. The role of the media has not been to keep us, their audiences, informed about one of the greatest crimes in living memory. It has been to buy time for US President Joe Biden to keep arming his most useful of client states in the oil-rich Middle East, and to do so without damaging his prospects for re-election in November’s US presidential vote. If Russian President Vladimir Putin was a madman and a barbarous war criminal for invading Ukraine, as every western media outlet agrees, what does that make Israeli officials, when every one of them supports far worse atrocities in Gaza, directed overwhelmingly at civilians? And more to the point, what does that make Biden and the US political class for materially backing Israel to the hilt: sending bombs, vetoing demands for a ceasefire at the United Nations, and freezing desperately needed aid? Worrying about the optics, the president expresses his discomfort, but he carries on helping Israel regardless. While western politicians and commentators worry about some imaginary existential threat those brief events of five months ago pose to the nuclear-armed state of Israel, Israel is quite literally wiping Gaza off the map day by day, quite undisturbed.
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heyitslapis · 3 months
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its times like this when i really wish i had an SO's shoulder to cry on
Because I think i factrued/sprained my foot the other day it happened wednesday but its still pretty swollen and pops when i try to walk on it without hobbling. i know i signed up for health insurance through work. i wrote down the insurance company name as Bayside and I have my personal insurance id number but the card never came in/got lost in the mail (and i already called for one replacement that never came so idk if theyll send me a third) so i cant confirm the insurance name nor call them, but i need to because ive called/visited 5 health care facilities around me and NONE of them have even heard of Bayside. So im calling the phone number that my manager provided me with telling me that was the insurance company. I keep calling the number (and mind you ive called them before to try to get a second insurance card sent to me but that was in like April) and i get that its saturday but theres no answer and the stupid automated machine wont let me leave a voicemail. the automated answering voice on the phone also says that theyre called National Benefit Plans by SafetyNet and google says the phone number im using belongs to National Benefit Plans out in San Antonio Tx (i live no where near there). I found National Benefit Plans' website on SafetyNetPlus dot com but National Benefit Plans doesnt have their own website, just through SafetyNet, and also the SafetyNet website says on a side panel that "this is NOT insurance" and instead keeps saying "health benefits" instead so idk what the fuck ive been paying for for the last 6 months tbh and im having an emotional breakdown bc i dont want to fuck my foot up for life just cause i couldnt figure out my health insurance/benefits shit
#ive been fucking sobbing on the phone for 20 minutes calling the phone number over and over again#im about to mcfucking lose it and im sad and confused and scared because my foot is still so swollen even though it doesnt hurt very much#and google says if swelling on an injury like this persists after 48 hours to go get it looked at#all the walkin clinics near me dont have any xray techs til monday & quoted me anywhere from $130-$300 if i dont have insurance which i can#provide proof of nor am i even sure i actually have at this point and im ngl my guys i only have like $180 to my name until next friday#but then basically my entire next paycheck is going to Geico#and overall im just having a really really really bad time rn and im scared that if my foot is actually fractured im gonna fuck it up worse#by walking around on it without a boot/cast. yeah ive been sitting at work the last few days#but its front desk at a hotel so at least for the first hour of my shift and last 1.5 hours i HAVE to be standing#my foot was so swollen after work today it hurt to get my shoe off#im just really fucking stressed and anxious and confused and im sitting here sobbing my eyes out realizing theres literally no one i can#call just to vent and cry it out with#cant call my mom cause i busted my foot leaving her place after her husband got in my face & screamed at me for saying you cant hit people#cant call my siblings cause none of them can help/we dont talk often enough that i feel like i can burden them with this#i have a few casual friends but same sitch im not close enough with them that i feel comfortable venting while sobbing to them#i could call my ex but shes got a new boo now/its not her problem/we rarely talk anymore/she cant help so no point in calling#only other person who knows/is worried about me is my ex's mom but she wont be home from work for break til 2pm & its 11:30am rn#not close enough to any of my coworkers either#its times like this that i realize how truly alone i am these days with no one that can physically comfort me#which of course is only making me more upset#thats what i get for being depressed and reclusive the last 2 years and only letting people get an arms length reach from me emotionally#there is a medical clinic i can go to that is a 50 minute drive from me and without insurance you just pay a $20 sliding fee plus a little#extra for the care services but again theyre not open until monday and also its a 50 minute drive from me#so all im learning is i shouldve gone some place thursday morning after it happened and im fucked at least til monday#FUCK my STUPID BAKA life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#whatever. guess imma keep icing it try to keep it elevated and just endure it and hope it doesnt get worse#emma rambles#vent tag#DONT REBLOG
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charmre · 4 months
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Going through a tiny existential crisis rn bc what if I don't get out of my master's program with a job??? 🙃🙃🙃
#I will have wasted all of this money to be in the exact same situation I was in before#I guess I made some friends but they're all off at their internships rn and will probably be off to something better after#meanwhile I'm just here#I mean I already got rejected from INTERNSHIPS from both of the local places that even do uxui#and like I don't have the money or like connections to just up and move somewhere new#so like#what's the point#what's the point of all of this#I'm just wasting money on another useless degree that all my friends will again leave me for better horizons anyways#and then we're never gonna talk again and I'll just be stuck here forever 🙃🙃🙃#personal#like what is the ACTUAL point I'm literally just going into more debt#and people everywhere are already talking about how bad the uxui industry is for entry level positions#and do I even WANT to be doing this for the rest of my life????#I honestlu am like only 70% in it for the 'decent amount of money' that it allegedly promised when I started down this path#idk what else to do#do I change gears again#I'M JUST WASTING MONEY#WHAT DO I WANT#I wish the threat of not being able to survive without money wasn't such an influence on jobs#THEN maybe I could figure out what I actually wanna do#but I don't even know that#I'm barreling towards nothing with no direction and I just keep FAILING#I want to die#but I can't dwell too hard on it or else I'll spiral worse so I guess I'll just....draw....#🙃🙃🙃🙃
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yoshistory · 11 months
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sorry to my former apartment place for talking shit. i was looking at my refund they're set to give me and they literally charged me nothing even tho i REALLY left that place a pigsty by my standards (couldnt vacuum my bedroom)(vacuum broke RIGHT as i tried to)(i could faintly smell cat pee in a corner)(eww)(tried my best to spray the shit out of it but still smelled it)(spackled a hole in the wall where i bumped my car in the garage into it very shittily and didn't have time for it to dry so i couldnt sand it)(left a huge maroon paint stain on the bedroom carpeting)(literally glued part of the window decoration back on and crossed my fingers about it)(painted the walls in the bedroom where you could still see the purple under it faintly)(did a REALLY bad job re-glazing my bathtub after it started peeling)(bathtub had faint purple stains on it from where my shower curtain unexpectedly started bleeding into the bathtub where it sat)
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deadsetobsessions · 8 months
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Danny used to be a vigilante, firmly on the side of good. Like, illegally, but morally good.
Danny’s 100% sure that whatever he is now, it’s not good.
Is Gotham’s influence just Like That?
He was homeless when he got to this thrice damned city (literally, because Lady Gotham was so cursed) and now he’s… here? In a mid-level penthouse with a rotation of homeless kids going in and out of his kitchen and eating out his pantry??
Danny adjusted the cuffs of his dress shirt, making the conscious decision to ditch the tie. He’s a tall 6ft 4 now, taking after his Dad. His head smarted all of the time, hitting doorframes when he was being a bit clumsier than the normal ghost-like grace he had learned to channel as The Phantom.
The Phantom instead of just Phantom. Why? Because Phantom was the name of a teenage vigilante in another dimension. The Phantom, on the other hand, is an intimidatingly tall, deceptively kind, extremely dangerous kingpin.
Honestly? Danny didn’t even want this life. Like, he had no idea it would snowball like this??
He supposed that it all started when the Penguin was trying to snatch kids off of his block on Crime Alley. Not officially his block, of course, because Danny didn’t actually enter this city to be a crime-shadow thing. But he hadn’t lost enough of Phantom the Vigilante to ignore kids getting hurt. He still hasn’t, if he’s being honest. He flew into a frantic search, tracking down the missing kids to Penguin’s bar. The Iceberg Lounge. Apparently, he wanted the kids to do some menial tasks and what not. Danny, rage flickering through his core, intangibly went in and robbed Penguin of every coin and secret the man kept.
Then? Danny blackmailed the Penguin to guarantee his kids a measure of safety from the Rogue. That began the slippery slope into whatever it is he does now. Penguin was being kept in line by Danny’s threats, the grip he had on the Rogue’s weak points, and a wonderful bit of intimidation.
——
“What, you stinking phantom? I’m stickin’ to yer rules!” Penguin snarled, forced to his knees by invisible blob ghosts.
Danny, salty and pissy from the lack of sleep he’d experienced trying to keep Penguin’s men in line as a result of Penguin trying to test where Danny’s lines were, dropped the temperature to the point where Penguin started shivering. Considering the place was already cold- the Iceberg lounge lived up to its name- it meant that Danny was standing nonchalantly in a room that was negative twenty five degree Celsius in a sweatshirt, Danny was already making good on his natural intimidation factor.
“It’s The Phantom to you, Oswald.” Danny said, in the tone of someone saying “it’s the shit, to you.”
Danny narrowed his blue eyes, letting a tiny tint of ectoplasm make his eyes glow a bit in the suddenly icing over room.
“Your people have been getting on my nerves, Oswald. Roughing up kids is so… uncultured. Are you sure you’re a Cobblepot?”
Penguin snarled, the effect of which was rendered ineffective due to his increasingly violent shivers. Plus, Danny loomed over him without even trying.
Danny, annoyed and asking himself “What Would Dan Do To Intimidate This Guy?”, gripped Penguin’s shoulder and hauled him up one handed. He dragged the mob boss over to one of the booths, avoiding the bodies he’d dropped (non-lethally) when Danny first walked in to ruin Penguin’s night. He shoved Penguin in chair he iced over, because Danny’s petty and if he saw one more bruise on his kids at Penguin’s hands, Danny was gonna go full Dan the Murderer.
He at least allowed to room to warm up before laying into Penguin, though. He stayed standing. Hey, he had the height advantage to use. He could have kept Penguin kneeling, but it was probably god the best that the mob boss got some sense of pride back.
(Danny had no idea that sitting as someone loomed over you to lecture and threaten you was even worse than kneeling. At least with kneeling, you knew where you stood. But sitting? It leaves you horribly off kilter.)
“I told you to keep your people in line. Kids are off limits, Oswald.”
“I kept them in line!”
Never let it be said that Oswald Cobblepot had a normal functioning sense of self preservation.
“Really?” Danny jabbed his pointer finger lightly on top of Penguin’s trachea and allowed his fingernails to sharpen into Phantom’s sharper digits. Penguin tried to lean away. “Then why did they start a gun fight when there were kids visible on the street? Why did I see one of my kids get hit by one of your poor excuses of a bouncer?”
“I-”
“Don’t care much for your excuses, if I’m being honest. I let you mess around with the little projects you have, without even breathing a whisper of your secrets. Sionis would love to know how you double crossed him the last deal, yeah?”
“I- I’ll keep them in line!” Penguin stuttered.
“Well, I believe in second chances,” Danny bullshitted. Ancients, how was this even working? “So I suggest you make an example of the guy that smacked Hailey around before I make an example out of you, Oswald.”
“Fine! Fine!”
——
And with that, he got access to Penguin’s resources and men and more importantly, the corrupt police officers. He made Penguin “boot out” the pedophilic ones (in a very violent way) and kept the rest.
Then? Mr. Freeze froze over the god damn pipes and Danny had to intimidate and make a deal with the Rogue so he and his increasing roster of orphans had access to warm water.
In exchange for Danny’s restorative and, more importantly, unmelting ice, Mr. Freeze was now Danny’s… on-call enforcer?? When he’s not researching cures for his frozen in a pod wife, that is.
Danny was satisfied with that. He was! But then Black Mask happened, with the man trying to engage in a battle of wits with Danny over the control of Crime Alley which, at that point, was firmly Danny’s territory.
The thing is, Danny doesn’t play nice anymore. Why bother with pointless mind games when he could just…
——
“So, you’re The Phantom.”
“And you’re Sionis.”
Black Mask twitched at the name, gloved hands pulling out his guns. Danny sat on the counter, head touching mid cabinet, and sipped out of Sionis’ favorite mug.
Because Danny broke into Black Mask’s safe house and stole his quality coffee. The man’s eyes were wary.
“How did you get in here?”
Danny shrugged. “Walked.”
Danny held the coffee out of the way as Sionis unloaded a clip into his chest and lunged forward to slap a mask onto Danny’s face. After waiting a bit, as Black Mask’s smug triumph bled into shock, Danny laughed and, using a bit of his natural strength, tossed the guy off of him. He casually took the mask off of his face.
“Jeez, I’m trying to be nice, here.”
“So, you’re a Meta.”
Danny grinned. “Eh. And you’re a cult leader with a mask fetish.”
Danny tuned out the rant about the “true face of Gotham” or whatever, already bored, and sipped at Sionis’ coffee. The ass might be a psycho, but his coffee tastes were wonderful. Danny stood up, rinsed his mug, and turned back to Black Mask.
“You’re trafficking people. Kids.” He said, cutting through Sionis’ chatter. He was sly about it too, committing violence and torture in a way that would ensure obedience and fear. Danny probably would have never caught on, Black Mask’s schemes being so ingeniously created and executed, had he not kept a hawk’s eyes on the more vulnerable members of Crime Alley’s community. And the rest of Gotham’s vulnerable communities, of course.
“My, a wonderfully obvious conclusion. Now, Phantom, I have a proposition for you.”
Sionis seemed to have gotten his bearings back. Danny tilted his head at him, looking down.
“You can work for me,” Sionis said, before opening a laptop with video feed to one of his masked men or whatever holding a knife to one of Danny’s more fearless kids. Danny snarled.
“Or, refuse, and your kid will lose a finger for every instance of your defiance.”
“I told you not to touch the kids, Sionis. I don’t allow trafficking either.”
Black Mask chuckled. “Cut off a finger, Sadness.”
“Yes, bos- ARGHHHH!”
Danny watched as Mr. Freeze froze the goon’s arms before breaking them.
“I’ve got her, Phantom.”
Danny nodded at Freeze, keeping an eye on Sionis in case the fool bolts.
“So, what are your cards now, Sionis? You’ve sure pissed me off with nothing to show for it.”
And that was the last night anyone heard from the one that was supposed to be the King of Crime.
But Gotham knew the head mounted on a pike at one of Black Mask’s hastily abandoned bases was a warning, that The Phantom was watching.
——
Then he somehow got a gaggle of more orphans that were undead zombie “Talons?”
From there, he just obtained influence over the crime bosses of Gotham. Because his Talons kept bringing him heads and blackmail and his crime alley kids and Gotham orphans kept bringing him information for food and safety?
But like, Danny never wanted anything in exchange for the safety he provided. His core could give less of a shit whether he got anything in return. But he couldn’t convince his kids of that! They’re putting themselves in danger and ugh-!
Danny checked himself once more in the mirror. Ready, he stepped out into the night to wait for the Bats at his new favorite VIP spots.
On the way, he passed Ivy and Harley, who he waved to. Pamela worked under him because he controlled Gotham’s criminal underground (which also mean the official parts of the city considering the sheer amount of corruption) and influenced them into more plant friendly methods. His dominion over Undergrowth also helped immensely.
Harley? They’re friends. He beat up and crippled her abusive ex. She gave him therapy and stopped torturing people for fun.
Danny stepped into the back door of the Iceberg Lounge. No one stopped him. No one dared to.
He settled onto a velvet couch, nodding respectfully at the server that had immediately and nervously set down his mai tai. He glanced around for cameras and wire taps, before giving up and upping his ectoplasmic output to short any recording devices out.
He sipped his drink as he waited.
“Batman.”
“Phantom.”
“Oh, good. You didn’t bring Robin,” Danny said, watching Batman tense. “Kids shouldn’t be in places like these.”
Batman stayed silent.
“Come on, sit.” Danny gestured to the couch across from him.
“This isn’t a social call. I’ll stop whatever you’re scheming-” Batman growled.
“Oh my god, you’re so dramatic. Is this where Nightwing gets it from?”
Batman snarled.
“Sit, sit.” Danny rolled his eyes.
Batman stayed stubbornly looming. Danny sighed, allowing his voice to slip into velvet danger.
“I told you to sit, Bruce Wayne.”
“You-”
“I won’t repeat myself again, Bruce. You’re testing my patience.”
Bruce sat, wary and hyper vigilant. Danny sighed, settling back in his chair.
“You’ve heard of Red Hood, yes? Don’t answer that, it was hypothetical. I know you’ve heard of him.” Danny waved a hand impatiently. “I don’t really care why he’s setting up shop in my Alley, but he’s upsetting the other crime lords. They’re asking me to interfere.”
“I don’t work for you.”
“No,” Danny acknowledged with a nod. “But I could make you, if you push it. Politeness would serve you much better right now, Bruce, seeing as I am doing you a… favor. And since I’m not shouting to the world who you are under the cowl.”
Danny gave Batman a pointed, patented, mom glare.
“… Apologies.”
“Now, you might be wondering what that favor is.” Danny watched Batman’s cowled face carefully. “I thought you should know that the Red Hood is your “Jason Todd.’”
Batman was still. And then Batman leapt at him, snarling, “How dare you-!”
Danny caught the vigilante by the throat and squeezed.
Batman’s flurry of punches- which, mildly ow, those gauntlets kind of hurt- quickly changed to clawing and maneuvers to get out of the choke hold. Danny held steady, cutting off the vigilante’s air supply until he began to go limp. He’s not Superman. Danny will bruise and kill, if he had to.
“Are you going to listen to me now?” Danny asked mildly, emulating both Black Mask’s drawl and Dan’s effortless psychosis.
Batman gave a weak nod. Danny plopped him unceremoniously back onto his couch. He sipped on his drink once more as he waited for Batman to cough some sweet air back into his lungs.
“I’m telling you to get your little birds in line before I have to go hunting, yeah? Keep your kids out of danger, Bruce, and I won’t have to step in.”
“He- how do you know..?” The growl isn’t there anymore, and Danny felt a smug sense of vindication of having smothered it out of the guy. Woah, no, that thought was too Dan and too little Danny. Danny handed him a cup of water, which Batman didn’t drink.
Danny rolled his eyes and raised an eyebrow. “Drink. If I wanted to kill you, I would have done it by now. And as for how I know…”
Danny held up a beat up copy of Jane Austen’s Sense and Sensibility, filled with Jason’s writing. He tossed it to Batman, who caught it with blank eyes.
“Water,” Danny reminded him firmly, feeling like a mother hen. Batman gulped down his water, eyes flicking between the pages of Jason’s annotated book. Ancients, Danny couldn’t believe he annotated his book. A crime lord, like that? Well, it’s not like Danny could say anything.
Batman looked up at him, a silent demand- no, plea, because he’s not in a position to make demands- for an answer.
“Broke into his safe house. You should contact your fling, Talia. Seems like she dunked him into these “Lazarus pits” and told him you replaced him with the current Robin.”
Danny could see Batman’s emotional gears hard at work and honestly, he doesn’t have time for that.
“Now, we’re done here. You owe me one for the information. I’ll collect later.” Danny grabbed the Dark Knight, who stayed oddly unresisting (shock, maybe?) , and hauled him up.
“Tell Tim Drake to eat more. He looks too skinny.” With that, Danny dragged the Dark Knight to the window and punted him out. His kids were waiting on hot chocolate night and Danny had to go shopping for quality ingredients.
——
“YOU COULDN’T HAVE TOLD ME THE BIGGEST CRIME LORD OF YOUR CITY WAS THE FUCKING HIGH KING OF THE INFINITE REALMS?!”
“Hn.”
“BLOODY HELL, DON’T YOU GRUNT AT ME, YOU BROODY BASTARD!”
Constantine let out a scream. Shite, the king who held his soul contract was a crime lord. Great.
——
The reason intelligence and convoluted schemes and genius doesn’t work against Danny is because he’s got weird standards of what he’ll tolerate and the fact is that his normal dumbassery and mother hen tendencies cancels out and coherent thoughts or plans he might have had.
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fingertipsmp3 · 1 year
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I do have to wonder how much of my ‘blood pressure being high’ was just due to 1) anxiety and 2) not being able to put the fact that this doctor basically killed my friend’s sister-in-law out of my mind
#okay she didn’t KILL her kill her but she failed to notice this woman had stomach cancer for well over a year#she presented with every symptom and this doctor kept fobbing her off; cancelling appointments; losing referrals etc#until Finally she managed to get referred to a specialist and they did a scan and found out she had stage 4 stomach cancer#she died six months after that. she’d been living without treatment for a year prior to diagnosis like… they could’ve saved her#this doctor specifically could’ve saved her#why did i see this doctor you ask? well there’s four doctors at my regular practice. two of them are male. i don’t fuck with male doctors#nothing against them but discussing my personal intimate problems with a man i don’t know and no chaperone is just not for me#i also had a male doctor repeatedly make weird comments about my body when i was a teenager so there is that#my dentist is a man though and we like him. one boy allowed#Anyway so there’s the two male doctors and then there’s this woman who basically killed my friend’s family member#and then there’s the other woman doctor but she is on leave at the moment and only taking phone appointments. she wouldn’t be back until#after my microgynon prescription ran out and she can’t take my blood pressure over the phone. so i was like. would i rather be examined#by a man or someone who is an idiot at best and negligent at worse. or take my chances with freeballing this shit (my period)#so there i am sitting in this woman’s office seething and no surprise; the best figure she could get from me was 121 over 95#bear in mind i’m usually sitting at 100 over 80. so.#she did take my blood pressure 5 times but the last time i saw she got an upper figure of 103 and she didn’t write the lower figure???#so i’m wondering if the meditation i was trying to do actually Did take my blood pressure down and she just didn’t want to accept it lol#should i buy a blood pressure monitor? i mean.. literally no because that’s an unnecessary expense and i’ve placed a moratorium#on unnecessary shopping in order to justify/afford a fucking TREADMILL#but seriously. i’m starting to wonder if i actually have hypertension or if i was just pissed at this woman. or if she’s just incompetent#i swear i’m not just mad because this is my second day of a reduced salt diet and i’m not enjoying it lol#i’m sticking to her orders i’m just….. i don’t know if it was bullshit or not. i mean how do i trust someone who watched a woman waste away#to skin and bone and continually fumbled referral paperwork and just overall failed to see that Something Was Very Wrong#i’m following her advice out of malicious compliance and because i don’t think it can hurt me but still. Still#personal
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neverendingford · 1 year
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.
#reading the staff announcement just feels gross.#I despise being pushed to market to others and I despise being marketed to. I can live without tumblr. I will continue to find new places#there's always somewhere new to learn. somewhere new to follow artists and somewhere new to keep up with current events#the moment we turn into products is the moment I'm fucking out of here. idgaf about whether your app development is profitable#literally not my problem. crying and saying “don't you see? we have to turn you into a product or we'll shut down” doesn't help#then perish. I give a shit about myself. that's it. everything else comes second to that. that's what the people on tumblr taught me#I learned self care here. and if taking care of myself means logging out and never coming back then that's what I'll do#I'll set my queue to something like 5/day and then just fuck off to something else. I'll pick up a new hobby or watch some shows#and I'll find something else to do with my life besides get pushed things that I hate.#maybe tumblr is harder to use. because it requires you to do the fucking work yourself. it doesn't dice feed you#corporate bullshit makes me want to leave and go start a new minecraft server and never come back to this website#idk. I hate the whole situation. I want to leave and never look back.#if things get worse I will go back to living under my rock. I've learned a lot here but I can move on#I don't have a reach. I don't pay artists. I don't really participate. you will genuinely be fine without me.#maybe I make a difference to the few people who follow me. but I can make just as much of a difference to other people other places#maybe I mean a lot to you. I can mean just as much to someone elsewhere. maybe I like it here. maybe I can like it somewhere else too
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rafecameroninterlude · 2 months
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can you pleaseeee do some angst with pogue!sweetheart!reader, like she overhears some of the girls at the country club talking about her and saying things like “i don’t know what rafe see’s in her, she’s still a pogue.” and rafe possibly reassuring her? thank you!
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warnings: bullying (?), classist comments, slight fluff
a/n: i got carried away (like always lol) leave requests if you’d like!
“rafe, as much as i love you, i don’t think i can stand out here much longer.” you fanned yourself, using your hand to block the sun from hitting your face. rafe and topper were currently playing golf while you played cart girl for them, the summer heat quickly becoming far too hot for you to handle. rafe paused their game, jogging over to you as he took his wallet out of the pocket of his pants.
“start up a tab at the bar, go ahead and cool off, baby.” you accepted his card, silently asking ‘are you sure?’ before he pressed a kiss to the corner of your lips. “go, on.” rafe reassured you, smiling to himself as he watched you make your way inside the country club.
you couldn’t help but sigh in relief when a gust of cool air blew past you, immediately ordering a virgin piña colada as you took a seat at the rather empty bar. rafe loved to bring you over to the country club, especially since you pretty much knew everyone from all the times you came to sell your baked goods, although it wouldn’t hurt to make some actual friends instead of acquaintances.
speaking of friends, you spotted a table not too far away, all three girls already looking at you before you smiled at them. no one smiled back. clearing your throat awkwardly, you fiddled with the rings on your fingers as you waited for your drink to be made. “you see rafe out on the golf course today? he is just so handsome.” oh, god. your breath hitched, your heart dropping as you continued to listen in on their conversation.
“he is! why he’s dating some pogue baker girl? i’ll never know.”
“that’s literally her over there.”
you shut your eyes, wishing the ground could swallow you whole. “i mean.. she’s pretty and all, but at the end of the day she’s still a pogue.” the girl’s laughter echoed in your ears, your skin flush with embarrassment. “well, it’s obvious that she’s just a charity case. rafe probably feels bad for the girl.” the way they all collectively agreed with one another made tears prick at your eyes.
just when you thought the comments couldn’t get any worse, your jaw nearly dropped to the floor at the next accusation. “maybe he’s paying her to have sex with him or something. i could imagine she has to scrape for some kind of change if she lives on the cut.” you were crying now, refusing to let them see any kind of tears running down your face. “one virgin piña colada.” the bartender placed the pretty drink down in front of you, a round of laughter erupting from behind you.
“a virgin piña colada? what is she? twelve?”
deciding you couldn’t take it anymore, you left a cash tip on the counter and muttered a ‘put it on on rafe cameron’s tab, please.’ before leaving without sparing them a single glance. to say you were mortified would be an understatement. rafe was probably going to freak out once he saw that you just up and left, but you couldn’t bring yourself to stay there another second.
you didn’t even make it out of the parking lot when you heard rafe’s voice calling after you. “y/n!” he was panting when he finally got to you, “hey, wait a second baby.” you quickly wiped your eyes before turning around, your boyfriend immediately sensing something was wrong. “woah, woah, what happened?” rafe tucked your hair behind your ears, cupping your chin before using his thumbs to stroke your tear-stained cheeks.
“nothing, i just don’t feel so good-”
“it’s not that.” he cut in, eyes flickering between yours. “what happened?” rafe asked once again. you knew it was impossible to lie to him. “tell me, baby, so i can fix it.” his jaw clenched, blue orbs wide with concern. you laughed bitterly. “you can’t fix girls who gossip.” at your words, rafe blinked before looking back at the country club. “are you talking about the snobs at the table near the window?” rafe took your silence as his answer, nodding slowly before draping an arm across your shoulders.
“what did they say?” his voice was eerily calm as he walked you two over to his truck. “it’s stupid, really.” you sniffled, letting rafe place you in the passenger seat. he kept the door open, leaning on the frame as he took your hand in his. “tell me.” rafe’s voice was stern, his chest rising and falling with each breath. you sighed, avoiding his gaze as you spoke. “they said that you have to be paying me to have sex with you because apparently i’m ‘scraping’ for change since i live on the cut.”
rafe’s jaw ticked, his eyes narrowing as he took your words in. “is that it?” he cleared his throat, his vision slowly blinding him with white hot anger. “they also said that they couldn’t understand why you would want to be with a ‘pogue baker girl’.. maybe their right.” rafe’s head shot up at your last statement, his face twisting in confusion. “what are you talking about?” he took your hand in his.
“i’m not even worth half of what these girls are,” you bit your lip to keep yourself from crying again, “i don’t have rich parents, i don’t have a trust fund that ensures i don’t have to work a day in my life, who am i kidding?” you shook your head. rafe studied you for a moment. “you know what you do have?” he lifted your chin, “a heart.”
“that’s something that no amount of money can buy. you have something priceless, y/n. you carry it with you everywhere you go.” rafe pressed a kiss to your temple, mumbling a ‘i’ll be right back.’ before he shut your door. you were a mess after that, his words not only being a comfort to you, but affirming.
rafe was gone for a few minutes before he strided out of the country club, a new piña colada in his hand. “here. now we sit and wait.” you took the drink from him, taking a sip as you watched two security guards escort the group of girls out. “what did you do?” you relaxed in your seat, glancing between rafe and the scene before you.
“got them blacklisted from the club. their parents aren’t as rich as you think.” he laughed, moving his attention to you. “don’t ever question yourself like that again. please.” he turned the engine on. “where are we going?” you asked. “we are going to go get you your own card, with your own little ‘trust fund’, alright?” he nodded.
“you’ll never have to worry about anyone talking like that about you ever again.”
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Text
Show me where it hurts (part 2)
Miguel O'Hara x spiderwoman!reader
Tumblr media
GIF by aenhanse
(AO3 Mirror), Part 1, Main Masterlist
summary: You confront Miguel.
warnings: breeding kink, cum play, animalistic behaviour (not quite ABO), mutual masturbation, dirty talk, praise and degradation, Miguel eats ass like a fucking champ, general filth etc etc. very very 18+, minors dni (and i will b blocking!) 
a/n: thank you for all the support for part 1! I will say, all the comments about relationship building and stuff do make me laugh a little bc this part is literally just p0rn with a teensy tiny bit of feelings.. but if you follow me this should be pretty standard by now.
wc: 4k ish
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You let yourself in again, but not until after pounding on the door. 
You think he's home, the scent of something in the air. At first glance, his place is empty, but a mess : cushions ripped off the couch, kitchen ransacked of its contents, floor covered in blankets and clothes. It makes you worry: Miguel is so clean it's scary . He would never leave his place like this. You hear something from his bedroom and rush towards it.
He's there, back turned on the bed. But something's wrong. In sweats and a tank top, he's breathing heavily, clutching at the sheets. 
"You shouldn't be here." He strains. 
Eyes wide, you step closer. Is he in pain? Is he hurt? "Miguel. I just want to help. Did something happen?" 
All he does is shake his head, unable to make eye contact with you. "I c-can't let you… please, bichita. It's not safe for you."
Your heart breaks at his helplessness, you get closer, and perch on the bed next to him. He jumps at the hand you place in his shoulder. Fuck. He's drenched in sweat. 
"Miguel, please. Let me in… I'd do anything. Just let me help."
He groans with his head in his hands. "I know, bichita. That's the problem. I can't let you…"
You look at him properly now. He's writhing on the sheets, tense and unable to sit still. Guiltily, all you can think is how good he looks; pretty even when his hair sticks to the nape of his neck, when he groans lowly at your presence. Your eyes rake down his body, looking for a secret wound, or something he's hiding. When you spot it, you gasp. 
Miguel is rock hard under his sweats. And he is massive. 
It clicks. Ashamed, he makes hesitant eye contact with you. "It's not usually this bad. And it gets worse if I'm near someone I'm…" He breathes. "Someone I'm attracted to."
You can't help but laugh at the absurdity of the statement; of the situation. "I think that's just what erections do, Miggy." 
He rolls his eyes, too annoyed to be as uneasy for a moment. " No , God, I meant my DNA. There's something wrong with me, something animalistic , that makes it ten times worse. I'm going crazy. Smell, taste, touch… and it doesn't just go away. "
You hum. "And what's your hypothesis?" 
He looks at you, a little crazed, but he gets it. If you talk to him like it's one of your status reports, like it's another mission, maybe he can stop thinking about pounding you into the sheets and filling you up with his cum. 
He clears his throat. " You . Gets worse when I t-think about you, or you're near."
You've got a hand on his thigh, rubbing circles that go straight to his head. 
"What makes it feel better?" 
Deep breath. "Touching myself. But I haven't… and I won't-" 
"Why?" You smile like a Cheshire cat. Are you… enjoying this? 
"I can't. You're a friend and it's a violation of your trust."
"It hurts. You're in pain. I give you full permission to give yourself some relief. You can touch yourself, for me. I want you to feel good."
His hips buck up involuntarily. Just thinking about it is driving him crazy. " Mierda. Stop talking like that-" 
"Like what?" You bat your eyelashes. 
"Like that ." He hisses. "Like you want to get fucked."
He squeezes his eyes shut, even more guilty. "I'm sorry. That's not appropriate at all. I shouldn't have… snapped like that."
You rub your legs together: you're fucking soaked. Like this, with his senses going crazy, you don't know if he can smell it, taste it in the air. The thought makes you even wetter. 
You mumble. "Meant it, Miguel. I just want to watch."
Agonisingly slow, you sink to your knees in front of him. He watches, eyes wide, trying not to lean into it. 
"Do you want me to beg? Because I will, if it makes you feel better." 
He grabs his crotch, rocking into his palm. You're breaking him down, bit by bit. 
"I think you like punishing yourself, Miggy. You think you deserve it. How long have you been like this? Weeks, I bet. When all you needed to do was ask me. I would've helped you over the phone if you wanted it. Told you how to stroke your cock, where to put pressure, asked you if it felt good. Think about how good it would feel. The relief. "
You rock on your heel and it doesn't go unnoticed. You light him on fire, and the thought of you getting off only pushes him closer to the edge. "Can I tell you a secret?" You whisper. He nods fervently. "I've always wanted you in my mouth. Just wanted to know what it would feel like; how pretty you'd look when you cum."
It's too much. His back arches, and he groans, spilling into his sweats. Astounded, you look up. So. Much. Cum. You didn't think a person could physically produce so much, but here he is, coating the inside of his boxers with it. Miguel, however, looks embarrassed: his first orgasm in a week and it's spilling into his trousers in front of a pretty girl like a teenager. He groans, covering his flushed face. 
"Can I…?" Your eyes are wide in amazement. Shakily, he nods. 
Is it bad for you to say he looks just like you imagined? Tan, long and with a bit of girth, and under all the cum he seems well-groomed. He's still half hard, which is impressive considering the sheer amount of cum splattered everywhere. Probably, he has the prettiest cock you've ever seen. As you pull down his boxers, your very obvious glee makes him pause. 
"...you like this?" He seems genuinely confused, and it makes you giggle. You've flustered him, yet again. 
Resting a head on his thigh, you look up at him through innocent lashes. Your other hand swipes cum off his tip, making his cock jump. "Could ask you the same. You're still hard." 
"I can't believe…" He mutters. "You're gonna kill me." 
"What do you want, Miguel?" You put a hand on his length, rubbing up and down ever so slightly. "You want to get off?" 
"I want…" It makes him grunt all the same. He goes from wayward glances to looking you straight in the eyes. " You . I want you." 
"How do you want me?" Deceptively innocent, you coax his length back to full mast with your hand. 
How do you want me? There are a thousand thoughts flying through his head, and his brows tense with the weight of them. Head back, he leans into your touch. He doesn't want to scare you, with the way he's been thinking about that question long before you asked: weeks, months, years before now. You see him hesitate, and bite his lip.
Your hands still and he cries out, cursing the loss of warmth. "M'not asking again." A little softer now. "No judgement, Miggy. I just want to help." 
Deep breath. "Anyway I can. Wanna fill you up with my cum. On top. U-Underneath. Mierda. I want your mouth. I want your sweet cunt. I-" 
You silence him with a moan when you envelope his cock with your mouth. You close your eyes in bliss as you bob up and down. Just the tip, teasing , and he's already addicted. With a pop, you separate, pressing sticky kisses and kitten-licks to his shaft and torso. He can't take his eyes off of you: peeking up at him through wispy lashes, licking up his cum. 
Pretty, plump lips smack at his tip obscenely. He can't help but think about how well it suits you; mouth around his cock like something holy.  Precum pours from his slit and you lap it up, chasing his moans. Your own moans vibrate deliciously around him and he wraps a hand in your hair. Finally. You want him to enjoy this, to lean into your head-bobbing, and force your head down onto his dick. You want to feel him in the back of your throat, bullying into the warmth of your mouth and moulding you into the shape of him. 
It starts with a little pressure at the back of your neck, deceptively subtle as he rocks his hips into your face. Making eye contact, you look up and feel your pussy clench around nothing. His eyes are lidded, gorgeous, mouth slightly parted and tongue darting out to wet rosy lips. 
"You want it, hermosa ?" His voice has a different texture to it: deep and wanting and needy. 
As best you can, you nod, humming affirmations around his cock. Oh God, of course you do. You want him; anyway you can, anyway he'll let you, more than he'll ever know. 
He pushes you down, hard, cock hitting the back of your throat like a piston. You gurgle and choke around him, throat tightening in a way that makes him melt. You force yourself deeper, hot tears welling up at the corners of your eyes. Your hands claw at his thighs, nails digging so tight into the fabric you think he might bleed. Winding a hand down to your heat, you press your palm into that sweet spot at your clit and Miguel watches, hungry. 
"Oh fuck , you feel so good. I'm gonna– m-mierda – m'gonna cum."
With a final tug, he pushes you down so your nose brushes at the curly hairs leading down to his cock, spilling into you with vigour. It pours down your throat and you drink it up with pleasure. 
"All gone?" He asks, panting with exertion. In response, you open up your mouth, sticking out your pink tongue so he can inspect it. He stirs when he realises just how cock drunk you are: nary a trace of him left on your tongue.
Slowly, he brings a thumb to your mouth, and watches intently as you swirl it around, and suck on it keenly. The pressure makes him light headed, other hand reaching for your waist to pull you up. And pull you up he does, turning you around so he can take off your suit and have you seated on his lap, where you belong. 
You let him, shrugging off the top half of the suit as he pulls down your zipper. Surprisingly gentle, he traces the slope of your shoulders, and down to your bare ass. He groans. No underwear, because of course , you want to kill him. You want him to die, pussy-whipped and half-hard. He pushes you towards the wall, back pressed flush against him. He drags his fangs across your neck and whispers into the shell of your ear, making your whole body shiver. 
"Once I start," He kneads your ass, grinding his cock against you. You gasp. He's still hard. "M'not gonna be able to stop. And it's not going to be sweet, bichita . You leave now and I won't be angry . I–I'll give you space, whatever you want."
" Miguel," Head back, you moan into his touch, dragging his hand towards your slit, hoping he’ll relieve the pressure at your pussy. "I want it to hurt. I want to feel it tomorrow– fuck– f-feel it when I walk and know it was you . Need it. Need you , please-" 
He bites into your shoulder, and you moan wantonly, back arching into his length. He places your hand on the wall, palms flat. Like the chaser after a burning shot, he soothes haphazard squeezes down your back with his mouth. Hot, messy kisses, as he sinks to his knees. He forces you to hinge at the hip.  Breasts pushed against the cool wall, you gasp when you feel him spread the globes of your ass as he presses his tongue to your hole. He licks the length of your slit, and like a slut, you lean into it. 
"Prettiest cunt I've ever seen, hermosa." He brings his hand to your clit, giving you a wet slap as he watches you shudder. Again, and again, until you cry out. 
" Miguel, fuuuck." 
How has he gone his whole life without hearing you say his name like that? Yet again, he almost cums in his pants, loosely shoved over his aching length. All he can do is watch as your holes flutter and clench around nothing, mesmerised. 
"You'd look even prettier filled with my cum, hmm?" He presses a sticky kiss to your puckered asshole, before easing his tongue inside. One hand holding you open, the other comes to play with your pussy, swirling your wetness around your throbbing clit. 
He tongue-fucks you with fervour, like a man starved: only coming up for air to babble obscenities. 
"Tan bonita, bichita." Slowly, he eases his fingers into your cunt, scissoring them open and shut. He wants to break you apart with only his hands, if you'd let him. "So pretty– fuck. So soft, baby. Beautiful."
You're close and he knows it, fucking yourself on his fingers and face like a bitch in heat. Undeterred, he brings a thumb to your clit pressing down with juust the right amount of pressure. 
"Wanna feel it, hermosa . Can you cum for me? All over my fingers like a good girl, just like that, así de simple."
With the way he paws at your pussy, all you can do is clench around his fingers. He guides you through a shaking, biting orgasm, licking up your cum with a flourish. Even with shaky legs you manage to turn around and pull Miguel up, and he follows eagerly. He looks fucked out already, eyes low and lips swollen with your slick. He motions to strip, stretching his tank top across the expanse of his chest and letting his cock spring free from his sweats. When you move to help him, he stops you, moving your hand from his tank to his solid torso beneath. He wants you to touch him; to feel your soft palm run across his skin, and sink into the warmth of your body. 
One hand at your waist, he presses you against the wall, grinding his cock to your clit. You wrap your arms around his shoulders and they fit like they belong there. Close, impossibly close, and his pupils are blown, wide. It's like he can't decide what he wants to do to you, sharp red eyes darting over your lips, your neck, down to the juncture where you both meet. A paralysis of choice, and all he can do is drink you up in the low light. 
And so, you make a choice for him, lips crashing against his, hand snaking around to guide his cock into your hole. He sinks into you - finally - and you swallow his moans in the aftermath. He's slow to start, eyes screwed shut as he gets used to how tight you are around him. Slowly, he rocks into you, the heat of his palm steady at the crook of your back. 
Miguel opens his eyes, caging you in with his other arm. He's testing the waters, angling his hips to find the spot that makes you tick.
"I didn't-" He breathes. "Didn't think it would be like this." 
You look at him in your haze, brows knitted. 
"I thought that when I finally fucked you, it would be more romantic." He gives you a strained chuckle and warm smile. "This is better in some ways, though." 
"Better , Miggy?" 
"Real." Your cunt flutters around him, and his pace stutters. Not once does he break eye contact, something swirling beneath the surface. "Not in my head. God , that sounds pathetic."
You giggle into the crook of his shoulder. It shouldn't be possible, but his eyes soften even more. And then, his expression changes into something dangerous. 
"I can't do this just once, bichita. You can't give me a taste and then take it away. Es cruel, mi vida."
As if to punctuate his point, you feel his tip slam into that spongy spot in your walls. His strokes become more calculated, punishing and exact, sending waves of pleasure radiating throughout your body. 
"Miguel – fuck– that's not fair- " 
"Can't keep humping my hand como un perro , like a dumb dog, anymore." He brings both his palms to your ass, spreading you apart, and pulling you up onto his dick so your toes barely touch the floor. The slap of your ass against his thighs and heavy balls fill the room, pornographic in nature. 
"Let-" Smack. " Me-"  Smack. " Fill-" Smack. " This-" Smack. " Cunt. " Smack. 
You babble into his ears, affirmations and praise that makes his heart and cock swell. 
'So pretty, Miguel. Yours. All yours." You rake your hands through his hair, harshly tugging him closer in a way that makes him burn up. Clenching around his length, you wrap your legs around his waist. He barely falters, pulling away from the wall and slamming into you regardless. You've seen him like this before; fiery determination that flares up on a tough mission. Tunnel vision: a razor-sharp resolve that has manifested itself in a man hellbent on your pleasure. 
"Miguel. Miguel, I-" I love you, I love you, I love you, I- " -wan' you to cum with me. Deep, please."
Now, his pace gets sloppy, hips stilling to drive himself as deep as you asked; so you can feel him long after you separate. Hot, sticky cum pumps into you and his balls strain with the effort of it. You claw your hand against his back, trailing delicious marks with your nails. When you clamp around him, you swear you see his eyes roll back - lost in the bliss of your cunt. Together, you come down from the high, bare chests panting against one another. 
"Don't look at me like that." His lips graze yours, soft and plush. You stretch your chin upwards, chasing the trace of a kiss he refuses to give to you. Eventually he relents, leaning into a sweet kiss, arm wrapped around your waist. 
He pulls himself off of you with a wet smack, gently carrying you to his bed. He places you in his sheets and you look beautiful, blissful, and fucked out. Cum drips onto your thighs and he feels a pang of possessiveness. His cum. His baby.
Clambering in to spoon you, he can't help but paw at your pussy, using his fingers to stuff his cum back into you, tracing lazy circles on your thigh with his other hand. 
"I'm on birth control, Miggy. So no need to worry." You snuggle into his touch, bare skin against one another. 
"Wasn't worried." He grunts, sounding almost disappointed. You catch his tone, intrigued.
"No harm in trying," You lilt, turning around to place your palms flat on the wide span of his chest. "You wanna fuck a baby into me?" 
Nodding, he groans, head back into the pillow, and you push him onto his back. Pussy throbbing, you straddle his hips; thighs tight around his middle. You can feel him growing harder in the slick of your slit. 
You arch into him, tender hand around his throat. It's a sight he won't forget easily: you on top of him, the gloom of the night tracing the swell of your tits. An angel, all the same. You whisper something into his ear that gives him goosebumps; a full body chill that goes straight to his cock. "My turn, bichito."
~~~
"You never called." Miguel says, laying his head next to yours, after wiping you down with a clean towel. He hands you a spare shirt of his, and you put it on, self-conscious. 
The two of you had fucked well into the night, making good on your promises. His stamina was relentless, pumping load after load into you, pussy-drunk and babbling. There was an intensity there that couldn't be explained: one that made both of you crazy for one another, burning you out between the silky sheets of his bed. Something you had initially attributed to his rut, whatever he had called it, but desperately hoped it was something more. How could this be just sex? After everything you had said and done, it would crush you: to taste the forbidden fruit and have it snatched away just as easily. 
You had both laid there for a bit, afterwards, cock softening in you. Plugging up his cum, he had said, but it felt more intimate in the quiet calm of his bedroom. 
"You didn't either." You throw back at him. 
"That's not th-" 
"I know, I know. It just felt weird, s'all." You turn from him, looking up at the ceiling. Counting the mottles and marks in your head, suddenly shy. After all the filthy things you've said and done to him, he still makes you shy. "I thought I did something wrong."
His heart breaks. "No, no , it wasn't-" 
"Not just today. Last time…a-and the time before that, honestly. We see each other less. You're always busy with something. Felt like you were avoiding me." Rubbing your temples, you sigh. "S'why I cut some corners on the mission. Made mistakes. I thought if I did well, and we had something to talk about…"
"Mierda." You can't bring yourself to look at him, to see the disappointment in his scarlet eyes. But it isn't disappointment, and it’s not directed at you. 
"I wanted to call, but I didn't. Because I didn't think you would answer." Finally, you turn to see his brows knitted: swirling with shame, guilt, sadness. Quickly you add, "I mean, I know why now. I think. And it's really on me, I should've said something or-" 
"I just… I didn't know what to do with it." He takes your hand in his, squeezing tight. 
"...I don't understand."
"All this love I have for you." He says, impossibly soft. "I didn't know what to do with it."
You know him like the back of your hand and you've heard it all: angry, snarky, giddy, beautiful Miguel O'Hara. But this? Confirmation of the feelings you've held for years at this point, dismissed during late nights and pored over during lonely ones - this? 
"And I didn't think you felt the same way, how could you? You're beautiful, and smart, and you have this… way of making people burn as bright as you. So I poured myself into work. That's all I know how to do, bichita. Work. Suffocate under everything. You don't deserve it."
With the way he says it; resigned, matter-of-fact; you want to cry. Still, he hangs on to the notion that he must earn it : that his claws are too sharp and fangs too bloody for redemption. For love, for life, for good things. Miguel O'Hara; doing what needs to be done. Alone, always. 
You come closer to cup his chin, to make sure he's looking at you. There can be no ambiguity, no gray area when you say what you want to say. 
"You don't tell me what to do, O'Hara . " You press a kiss to his cheek, and another to trembling lips. "I decide what I deserve. No-one else does, not even you."
"It's not like you listen to me, anyway." He says with a shaky smile. 
Sitting up slightly on your forearms, you place your head up on his chest. Listening to the steady thump-thump of his heart. You don't need your super senses to know that he's alive, that he's here. The look in his eyes; you couldn't explain it if you wanted to. 
"Bichita." You say, out of the blue. No doubt due to your poor pronunciation, he winces. "What does it mean?" 
Clicking his tongue, he waves it off. " Very vulgar, you don't want to know. I mean, I shouldn't really-"
"Hmm." Shaking your head, you feign ignorance. "It's just that Lyla said it meant sweetheart, or little bug... terms of endearment, I think was the phrase."
"She said that?" He frowns. "Lyla's filling your head with nonsense, m'afraid. It's sarcastic. Post-ironic, metatextual… it comes across completely different in Spanish, mi vida."
"Post-ironic? That's not even the second most pretentious thing you've said today…" Giggling, you bury your head into his chest. 
"Of course not. I reserve my best stuff for you."
"Real classy, O'Hara. Bet you say that to all the poor women that end up in your bed."
"Nope." He hums. "Just the ones I've been in love with for the past two years."
He pulls you closer, smiling into light kisses on your shoulder, the fat of your stomach, your thighs, on your cheek. Kisses everywhere, anywhere he can reach.
"Just you, bichita." He breathes into your skin. "Only you ."
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prettyg1irlstears · 5 months
Note
i js saw ur pillow princess reader x rafe blurb n its amazing !!
but how would rafe x gf!reader be when rafes friends have been bringing up about how it feels good when ‘the girl takes charge’ but she gets upset n self conscious cs she literally cant, shes js a pillow princess at heart !! she wld constantly ask rafe if shes good enough in bed, if its fine she cant ride him like his friends have been showing off :(((
first of all thank you!!<33 second of all i’m so sorry if i’m answering late, but i hope you’ll like it<3
softbf!rafe x sub!reader
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you’re in the large living room of tannyhill, a pretty sundress on while sitting of your boyfriend’s lap, listening to the conversation between him and his mates.
you were telling rafe that you’ll come tomorrow, that it’s fine if he wants to have a ‘all bro evening’, but rafe insisted on you staying, so you did, because you’re his good girl.
so here you are, playing with rafe’s fingers as the boys don’t bother to acknowledge or respect your presence and talk about their girls.
“bro, my girl’s wildin’ when she takes charge,” kelce boasted, smirking as he took a swing of his beer. “doin’ all the work, feels so good.”
your chest tugs anxiously, slightly squeezing rafe’s fingers as you listen.
“yea i feel ya, man,” topper adds, grinning as he high-fives kelce. “wish you could see the way sarah moves on me ‘cause like goddamn..”
you feel yourself getting uncomfortable, partly because they’re talking about their girlfriends like they were a piece of meat, but mostly because you know you’ll forever be a pillow princess.
“yo, top,” rafe feels jow uncomfortable you are, stroking your silky hair lovingly, thinking it’s just because the conversation’s too much for you. “it’s my sister, man, don’t be gross,”
“sorry bro, not my fault she’s freaky,” topper sneers, kelce chuckling along with him.
you withdrawn a little bit, nuzzling into rafe’s chest as your mind runs a marathon. you were never able to take charge, especially in bed. you and rafe tried it a few times, but you always get all shy and embarrassed, just simply not finding it in yourself to be dominant. but now, after you heard the boys’ conversation, you feel even worse than ever.
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“you okay, baby?” rafe asks you softly. the boys have already left, you’re now helping rafe clean the beer cans and pizza boxes. he has noticed something’s off — he always does.
“mm good ray, just tired.” you fake a yawn and give him a small smile.
that seems to make rafe calmer, maybe he just doesn’t want to press you. he comes over to you, placing his hands on your waist. “can we still do sum’ or are you like really tired?”
you chuckle and look up at him. “no we can still do something.” because even though you still feel bad, you can still feel a little wet spot making itself in your panties just from that one simple sentence.
rafe smiles and kisses you, his hands moving from your waist to squeeze your butt. “alright let’s get to bed, hm?”
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you thought it would make your mind go elsewhere, like always, but even when you’re a moaning mess under the muscular body of your boyfriend, you’re still thinking about it.
“what’s the matter, bunny?” rafe grunts into your neck as he kisses it, giving you long and deep thrusts.
“n-no, no!” you let out in a whimper, squeezing his shoulders. “please don’t stop.”
rafe smirks, slowing his pace even more as he bites on a soft spot of your neck. “then what is it?”
you whimper at that, but you can’t keep your worries inside anymore. “am i good enough for you?” as soon as these words leave your mouth, rafe stops, stilling inside of you, making you let out a small whimper of disapproval.
“baby.. baby look at me, will ya?” he gently takes your chin in his hand, making you look up into his eyes.
you look, his hand caressing your cheek as you look up at him with those puppy eyes of yours.
“why would you ask that?” he asks, his voice soft as he has no idea where this is coming from. “of course you are, you always were and always will, baby.”
“because i can’t ride you.. can’t make you feel good..” you say quietly, tears welling up in your eyes. “mm sorry rafe, i just can’t..”
“hey, hey, look at me, baby..” he makes you look at him again, his hands running through your hair and caressing your cheek. “that’s perfectly fine, bunny. you’re perfect, i swear to god,”
you’re looking into his eyes, nervously playing with his curtain bangs. “are you sure? ‘cause i felt really bad earlier..”
rafe chuckles a little, kissing your forehead. “baby, don’t listen to those two pricks. can’t appreciate their girls like i can apprexiate mine.”
he kisses your lips softly, slowly starting to move inside you again. “i love you being my little pillow princess.” he grunts at the movements, earning a tiny moan from you. “wouldn’t change for anything, baby.”
“you mean it..?” you ask, leaving out tiny whimpers as he moves slowly yet deeply, wrapping your legs around his waist.
“absolutely,” he whispers, kissing your lips while leaving out small moans. “don’t have any idea what you do to me like this.”
“alright..” you feel a shy smile growing on your lips, tugging on his hair as his tip hits that one spot inside you. “r-rafe.. please.. faster..”
“faster, yeah?” rafe smirks, increasing his pace, holding the side of your neck, earning sweet little moans from you that make his cock twitch inside of you.
“don’t need ya to take charge, baby..” he lets out a pretty moan into your ear. “js’ fucking you like this is enough for me to go absolutely crazy.”
. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁
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