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#when i tell you guys im so sorry i haven’t posted much recently - i really am so sorry!!
celestialwrites · 6 months
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saying ‘i love you’ without saying ‘i love you’ dialogue prompts
@celestialwrites for more!
♡ “to me, you are perfect.”
♡ "don't you realise? you are my world."
♡ "you brought me back to life."
♡ "the only way i know how to describe what i feel around you is home. i feel at home."
♡ "it's as if my entire life i have been sinking in a storm and you came and pulled me out."
♡ "you know i stayed for you, and frankly, i don't regret it one bit."
♡ "with the whole of my heart, i believe that together we are infinite."
♡ "i never intend on leaving you. you hear me? never."
♡ "thank you for being the shoulder i always needed, even when you hated me."
♡ "i can't live without you!"
♡ "never leave me, my heart couldn't bear it."
♡ "i've spent my whole life waiting for you."
♡ "consumed in darkness, you darling, were my light."
REBLOG TO SUPPORT YOUR LOCAL WRITERS!!<3
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soberrsoon · 10 months
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Can you do a fic about Bill or Tom (doesn’t matter who because atp I can’t decide whether I’m a Bill girl or a Tom girl 😭) where both him and reader have been dreaming of eachother, but they’ve never met like ever. Like randomly they started having dreams of eachother, but the catch is, they’ve been dreaming WITH eachother. Then maybe one day they see eachother irl and both are in shock to find out that they’ve been dreaming with eachother
(Sorry if this doesn’t make sense 😭)
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T. KAULITZ x READER
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★ 𝐬𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: you haven’t gotten much sleep lately since you’ve been dreaming about a mysterious boy.
★ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠: alcohol, swearing
★ 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫’𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: LOL i am definitely a tom girl but anyways sorry i’ve been busy y’all 😻 i have to do band stuff (yes im in band) speaking of which though… band camp is starting soon so im gonna be really busy unfortunately 😭 but send reqs and i’ll try to write as much as i can and get a lot posted before i leave and i also try to post during it as well!! ALSOOOO my birthday is tomorrow yippee 🥳
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you haven’t been able to sleep much recently, not ever since a mysterious bit appeared in your dreams. it was strange since you’ve never seen him before but you weren’t complaining since damn he was hot. your dreams with the boy were all very vivid, almost like they were real and you feel in control in those dreams, like it’s real life. you and the mysterious boy never speak in the dreams, usually you two would just enjoy each others company, amused by one another.
you wondered if that boy was real person dreaming just like you.
before you could overthink it though, you got up to get ready. you brushed you teeth, got changed and started making breakfast. you placed your food on the kitchen table before taking a seat and calling your friend liz. “can i come over later?” you asked her through the phone. “sure. i’m just picking breakfast right now, want some?” she asked. you looked down at your plate, deciding whether to eat at your place or abbi’s. “i’ll have some, see you later,” you said.
you packed your breakfast up put it in the fridge, making your way out the door to abbi’s house. since her place wasn’t that far, you would always walk over which took less that 15 minutes. when you finally got to her house, you decided to tell her all about your dreams with the mysterious hot boy. “okay so like the dreams are super vivid, but they’re just dreams,” you explained. “and the boy? do you know him?” she asked. “that’s the thing! i don’t know him, he’s like super mysterious,” you replied.
“well what does he look like?” she asked. you though about it entire giving your response. “well he has like dreadlocks, he wears baggy clothes and he has a lip piercing right here,” you explained, pointing to your lip. “he sounds totally hot,” abbi said sarcastically. “ugh you don’t get, i wud you could see him because he is totally hot,” you said. “yeah whatever,” she said.
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you guys continued eating your food before abbi started talking. “do you wanna go out tonight?” she asked. “i don’t know… i’m not really i’m the mood,” you replied. “well maybe you’ll find your dream boy,” she said. “oh you’re right, fine i’ll go but you’re paying for first round of shots,” you said laughing as abbi rolled her eyes. you guys decided to go out to run some errands before going back to your place to get ready.
you guys first went to the post office since abbi had to mail something. you waited outside since she’d be awhile and as you waited you noticed someone that caught your eye. it was a boy who looked exactly the one in your dreams but… different? you thought. this boy had spiky black hair instead of dirty blonde dreadlocks. he was inside a gift shop across from the post office. you quickly rushed into the post office to grab abbi’s attention.
“abbi! look! across the street, that boy with black hair, do you see him?” you asked. “yeah…? what’s wrong with him?” she asked. “he looks exactly like the boy in my dreams,” you said. abbi didn’t speak for a second. “wow, i’m sorry i doubted you then, that boy is hot,” she said. “i know right?!” you replied. “well what are you going to do?” she asked. “nothing i guess, i mean what can i do?” you replied. “you’re right, let’s just go back to your place now,” she replied.
you two took a taxi back to yours since it would’ve been a 30 minute walk. “maybe we will fine your dream boy tonight, i mean we basically saw his twin today,” abbi said. “maybe,” you replied, focused on your mascara. abbi was curling her hair and you were doing your makeup as you waited for her to finish. you two switched before both finishing. “you done?” she asked. “almost,” you said, putting your hoop earring in. “okay! now i’m done,”
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you guys took get another taxi to the club for a night out, hoping to find your dream boy or at least get drunk. the club was packed today, it’s not like it was the weekend so you weren’t sure why. as you two walked in you could tell the club was filed with girls, all in a crowd surrounding someone. you and abbi tried looking to see who it was but couldn’t push through the other girls. “is there a celebrity or something?” abbi asked. “i don’t know but let’s just go to the bar,” you replied. as you two left the crowd, you didn’t realize a pair of eyes following you.
you ordered your drink along with abbi and you guys started talking as you waited. “look around, do you see him?” you asked abbi. “i can’t tell this club is filled with girls,” she said. “yeah i wonder what that’s about,” you said as you looked at the crowd. your drinks arrived and you two started drinking, you both got shots. even though abbi could not hold alcohol she always insists on drinking and she was already drunk after her third shot.
she decided to walk around now, searching for a hookup and you decided to follow her. she laid eyes on a boy with curly brown hair and started making a move, you decided to leave her and go sit on a sofa. you sat around awkwardly now not knowing what to do until you locked eyes with familiar face. you couldn’t believe what you were seeing, it was the boy from your dreams. he had the dreadlocks and everything and he looked shocked to see you as well. you didn’t know if you should approach him or just leave it because what if he thinks you’re crazy?
you convinced yourself that you were seeing things and that the alcohol was kicking in so you went to the nearest bathroom you could find. you splashed your face with water before getting your phone out to text abbi about the encounter. you then prepared yourself and walked out.
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“hey,” you heard a male voice call from behind you as you slowly turned around. “hello?” you asked. it was the same boy you saw a few minutes ago. “this may sound weird but i’ve been seeing you in my dreams lately and i haven’t been able to sleep. i knew i had to approach y since this was such a coincidence,” he said and you were surprised that he was dreaming about you as well. “wow, oh my gosh. i’ve been dreaming about you too, i wasn’t sure you were real when i saw you but i haven’t been able to sleep recently either,” you replied.
“let me buy you a drink,” he said. you nodded and followed him to the bar. you guys got to talking more and you both realized you’ve been dreaming about the same thing. “do you think we’ve been dreaming together? i mean my dreams feel pretty vivid,” you said. “surprisingly this makes sense,” he replied. you guys instantly clicked after that. you found out that his name was tom and you told him about your encounter with his “look-a-like” which you now know as his twin bill.
once you both left the bar you started texting instead and of course you had to tell abbi all about it.
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woniebunny · 6 months
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JARED CAMERON x Y/N ONESHOT
A/N: Hey guys!! It’s been a hottt minute since I posted anything. I’ve genuinely been so busy with work and uni and lots of moving 😅. Life has just been a lot and finding time to write was kinda tricky but hopefully going forward I’ll be a little better at it. I did have one user ask about me potentially writing something separate about Jared and his imprint and I actually really liked the idea and finally got around to it so hopefully you guys enjoy it!
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3 weeks. 3 weeks is how long it’s been since I’ve avoided you. 3 weeks of trying to ignore how much I miss our conversations or your laugh or even just your presence. 3 weeks of pretending Im okay and feeling guilty for not being able to be honest because how do I tell the most important person in my life that I’m falling for the one person they want a chance with more than anybody else. 3 weeks of feeling like the worst best friend in the history of best friends. *Ring ring ring* and there goes the last bell signaling the end of the school day and effectively bringing me out of my thoughts. I gather and pack up all my things and start heading out the door to meet Kim as per our usual routine of walking home together. As I go to put my things in my locker I can hear someone stopping next to me. “Hey would you wanna go get ice cream on our way home?” I start asking Kim as I shut my locker only to turn and come face to face with the last person I wanted to see at the moment. Jared Cameron. “Sorry I thought you were Kim, what’s up?” He doesn’t respond for a minute or two, just continues staring at me. “Cameron?” Looks like he snapped out of whatever trance he was in. “Sorry, I was just wondering if I did something wrong or if you’re mad at me?” “Huh? No Im not, why would you ask that?” “Well I haven’t really seen or heard much from you the past weeks so I guess I was just curious” “oh guess I’ve just been busy and we haven’t really been partnered recently, but I’m not mad.” “Oh okay… cool” as he starts nodding his head and awkwardly giving me a thumbs up, it almost makes me wanna laugh as I feel my lips fighting to lift. “In that case I was wondering if…” “Y/N!!!” He pauses and I whip my head around hearing Kim yelling to me as she runs up. “Im so so sorry I got held back a few mins cause some kids were blocking the door but I’m ready if you wanna start heading home and… oh hi Jared I didn’t see you there” Kim says as I see her slyly giving me a questioning look. “Hey Kim, I was just asking her a question about history class. Hope you guys get home safe.” “Thanks! Let’s go Y/N!!” She replies as she grabs my arm and starts running to head home. I can feel him watching us as we leave but I keep my focus on Kim. It’s about a 10 minute walk, 15 since we stopped for ice cream along the way, before we reach Kim’s house and she invites me in. “Oh Y/N honey how are you? How are your parents?” Asks Ms.Connweller as we’re passing through to get to her room. “We’re good Ms. Connweller thank you for asking” “that’s good to hear, well dinner should be done in about 20 minutes if you don’t mind staying, you know we love having you over” “that sounds great Ms.Connweller thank you” “of course dear, now why don’t you girls go relax in the meantime” and that was our signal to head to Kim’s room. Soooooooo my precious Y/N, do you wanna tell me what that was about?” “Pardon? What’s what about?” “Jared Cameron talking to you by your lucky, which I’m so sorry for interrupting by the way I didn’t mean to” “no no it’s okay, like he said he was just asking about class.” “Hmmmm” “what do you mean hmmmm?” “I think he was gonna ask you out” she giggles. What. “What do you mean?” “Girl did you not notice how he was staring at you when I took you away, not to mention he was in the middle of talking to you, and it’s not like you genuinely talk to anybody beside Embry and I… so yeah all clues are pointing to him asking you out! Oooooohh this is so exciting, I’ve never seen you go on a date it’d be so fun to dress you up!” What. The. Hell?? “You’d want me to say yes to Cameron? Seriously Kim?” I ask staring at her like she’s crazy. Isn’t she in love with him? Is this a trick?? Why would she be happy? “Well I mean if he asks you then yeah! It’s about time you get a boyfriend and he looks like he’s genuinely into you which a green card in my books” “wait but aren’t you into him Kim? Wouldn’t that be wrong..?” “Huh? Girl I just thought he was cute like major eye candy like Embry for example but I’m not actually into him haha” she starts laughing.
“Wait did you think I was genuinely in love with him?” “Uhh.. yes?” I answered more like a question unsure of what’s happening. “Lmaooo girl nooo eye candy haha he’s all yours if you want him. Besides I’m talking to Axel at the moment I thought you knew?” Oh. My. God. “Oh” “wait, is that why you’ve been avoiding him since your guys group project? Awwww you’re such a sweet best friend but seriously if you don’t get with that boy I will slap you cause he’s very obviously in love with you” “I was cause I didn’t wanna ruin our friendship and mess things up” “and I appreciate that and guarantee it won’t even if I did like him like that you should know I’d never make you choose. You’re my sister Y/N forever and always and I love you and support you no matter what. So please please please do me the big favor of getting with him” “hahaha okay Kim, I love you too, forever and always” “Girls dinner is ready!” Ms.Connweller yells from downstairs. “I’m glad we had this talk now idk about you but I’m starving, let’s go eat!”
The next day at school as I’m standing by my locker again I feel someone stop next to me. Now knowing that Kim was 100% okay with anything happening between Jared and I, I feel a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. Maybe that’s why I don’t hesitate to close my locker and immediately turn “Hey Jared, what’s up?” “Hey Y/N, I know this is kinda random but we got interrupted yesterday and I was just wondering if maybe you know you would like to go out with me?” He rambles really quick and closes his eyes and turns his head like he’s waiting for me to yell at him. “Like a date?” “Huh? Oh yeah, uh like a uh date? If that’s okay?” “Okay” “Wait okay? Like okay yes?” “Yes Cameron lol okay yes. I’d love to go on a date with you” he starts smiling and practically bouncing in place “oh oh my god, I, wow, oh you actually said yes I am so happy I promise I will make it the best date ever okay I will see you later!” He goes to leave but I stop him “hey Cameron, don’t you kinda need my number to tell me when and what time the date is and to find out where to pick me up?” “Oh yeah, sorry I got excited” as he sheepishly scratches the nape of his neck and handed me his phone. After putting in my number and watching him excitedly leave almost tripping over another student when he turns to wave at me one last time, I don’t stop myself from letting out a laugh and smiling this time. I just know he’s going to make me the happiest girl in the world and the best part is I didn’t even have to go looking for him. I guess I have the moon goddess to thank for that.
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zombabiee · 1 year
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11:39pm
im realizing im a sad bitter lonely person.
I love getting attention at work but ik it doesn’t mean shit. Im just a girl to be toyed with for a few mins, n i’ll play along when i want
To some i am the most beautiful girl they have ever seen. Some of these men are ugly and insecure. Probably haven’t had a decent conversation with a woman either and are stuck in a loveless marriage.
To others im a reminder of their youth n how the years have passed them by. I feel like im seen as the line between a “lover and a friend” when i say lover i dont mean it in a way im actually involving myself with these older men, i mean it in how they might see me. As if i gave them a chance, cuz i know they can say its more than just lust n claim its some deep form connection/bond or whatever the fuck. But have your mid-Life crisis dumped onto me? No thanks. But I’ll hear your struggles and validate your pain, just don’t ever exploit me. Since my area is so ghetto n I’ve been told im not, of course im perceived as different in their eyes n i feel like thats one of the reasons they like that about me. Of course other than im just a pretty girl who likes talking when she can.
N to the few who seem actually interested in me? I feel sorry for them because I can’t reciprocate their feelings. I must have high standards or something because in my mind i would be telling myself that im settling. I dont think its wrong to be this way but sometimes i think it might. They’re these two guys who im chill with but I just think their personality and humor is a bit to dull for me. But I relate to them because ik they’re just as insecure as me n want what i want. To be desired and loved. I almost feel like im more insecure than them. N I think at this point it makes me self absorb because its like why are you trying to make this a competition? All i know is I don’t want to mess with their feelings by talking to them too much. Because that happened to me n it took a blow to my self esteem and self worth.
What i want in a guy is somebody like him, hes funny, tall, brown, outgoing he works drives n knows how to keep talking 2 me! He genuinely makes me so shy n awkward and it sucks because I think thats the new thing I discovered about myself. I come off as so boring and uninteresting when i actually like a guy because im afraid they wont like me. So i hide behind a wall because I actually like them. As of rn he hanged out with his “ex” (shouldn’t even call her that at this point) and it made me sad. It makes me remember that im behind and inexperienced. I feel like thats why total nerds like those two like me because i give off those vibes. That im a total virgin like them. I don’t want to pity them because I wouldn’t want them to know that i feel sorry for them. Its just better for them to not know because it feels shitty to know someone gave you attention because they felt sorry for you. N I don’t want to be like that.
It made me mad to see them together. as of late its been making me jealous even to see couples on my feed. Going out on late night drives, spending time with each other,… but Eating out? not so much. This is an evil thought but I genuinely do think its sweet its just my competitiveness talking. This one couple always eat out n post about it all the time. She recently posted a Halloween pic of themselves and you could tell they visibly got chunkier 2gether, I genuinely think its so sweet I really do but i just couldn’t help but think that i was able to loose sm weight already and it made me even worry about getting with someone because they’ll make me gain it all back. It feels shitty ngl because the thought alone helped me feel better that i don’t have a boyfriend like everybody else. That everyone in my mind is going to get fat and im just going to be this ‘beautifully tragic slim girl that no boy she wants will want her back but how can that be if she’s so pretty and went through sm change?’ I fantasize about myself soo much. Sooo much. I need to loose another 10 pounds ill be happier. I need to loose the weight to spite the guys who didn’t want me, to make the girls ask how i did it, to impress and show off on everyone. I want my thick little thighs and skinny little waist to walk around people ive known to make them think about me to oggle me to congratulate me. To ask about me to talk to me. I feel like every other thing about myself is shitty and useless so i just feel like i have absolutely nothing to offer other than what i think is beautiful n i so desperately want to be seen that way and I have been wanting that for years.
This year was the worst for my self image and worth and ive chosen really bad ways to cope with those feelings but at least I’ll know they pay off will be what I finally been wanting
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voulezloux · 2 months
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wait when u were talking about ur ex i thought u meant someone from ur past and sorry for asking but is it the same guy u recently celebrated an anniversary with?
you’re fine for asking!
short answer: yes. this is the same guy
long answer: unfortunately the guy i had just celebrated an anniversary with, i have since broke up with. we broke up a week after our anniversary and it’s honestly for the best! looking back on our relationship, he kept a lot of things from me that he should have told me from the beginning and i am sadden that i feel like i didn’t respect myself enough to see the signs earlier. the last straw was him asking something of me he knew going into i would never be okay with due to a previous partner experience, and in his response to my breakup text, he said he felt like he was running out of options to try and save our relationship. and he never once thought he should talk to me about the issues he was having. he would allude to having issues that he wanted to talk about, but never would say what the issues ever were. all the issues he was having were a shock to me the day we celebrated our anniversary and ultimately, his lack of transparency and his inability to have a conversation with me when things were hard led to the end.
i will be the first to admit i’m not the perfect partner, i have my own issues and insecurities and i tend to be a people pleaser no matter what. but i had always been open and honest about my wants and needs but he never returned the same sentiment. the past 10 days have been fine, ive had bouts of anger when i finally let myself look back on the relationship, but ultimately, im doing fine. i haven’t unfollowed him on social media because i didn’t want to be that petty ex and i have been trying to not to dwell on things as much because, alas, the world keeps spinning, bills still need to be paid, and i still have schoolwork to do.
however, moving forward, i will be doing the thing he most certainly has been fearing for since i told him, and i will not be pursuing a friendship with him. regardless of how things ended, im the type of person who isn’t friends with their exes (except one but really do not consider him as ex, he is one of my best friends) and because a high school ex, i tend to leave people before they can leave me. but, with how things ended, if he could not respect me in a relationship, how am i supposed to expect him respecting me in a friendship? its not fair to me to go above and beyond to make sure things work out while not respecting my own boundaries just so he can feel better about having me in his life. i also will not be telling him since, you know, he couldn’t tell me shit. he’ll come to that realization on his own. im not going to disrespect my own boundaries just so he has closure. he dug his grave and now he has to lay it in.
i know this isn’t what you were expecting when sending this ask, and i haven’t really been making this known besides text posts where i ramble in the tags. and i can’t always count on people reading the tags, and those posts are more meant for me to get out whatever i’m feeling so i don’t bottle it up until my next therapy session. but yeah. that’s where im at.
for reading this lengthy response, i offer you a picture of my pets in this trying time
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watchmegetobsessed · 3 years
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TO LOVE AND BE LOVED - Part One (Harry Styles)
a/n: oh my god i am sooo thankful for the love the masterlist got with just so little info about the story! it means so much to me and i really hope i won’t disappoint you with this story! i was planning to post the first part on tuesday but i got excited bc of all the feedback and reactions and decided to start earlier, so here it is, part one of TLABL, a story im kind of proud of and very happy to share! please drop by my ask box or leave your thoughts on the story, i would love to hear everything from you guys!
pairing: CEO!Dad!Harry X Reader
warning: mentions of death, cheating and divorce
word count: 11.2k
SERIES MASTERPOST masterlist
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���I hope you realize this holds nothing against you, we all love and appreciate you and your work, but we had to face some unexpected problems this past year.”
You sit in front of Claire, your boss completely dumbfounded, not even comprehending what she is saying completely. You came to work this morning absolutely oblivious that today is going to be your last day of work at the daycare you’ve been working at for over two years now.
“I’m sorry, but last time you let us in on the budget you didn’t bring up any complication that might have indicated someone could lose their job, so what possible problem could have come up so abruptly?” you ask with a shocked and nervous chuckle. Part of you kind of hopes this is just some stupid joke she is playing on you, but Claire is not one to make games out of such serious things. Letting out a tired sigh she pushes her reading glasses up to the top of her head into her carefully curled hair.
“Look, I’m really trying not to make a big deal out of it, but we had to make some cuts on the budget. The kitchen and gymnasium renovation was completely unplanned and it kicked us in the butt. We are making some changes about the groups this year and it was made that it can be solved with one less person on the team. I’m sorry it had to be you, but the decision had to be made.”
“But why me?” you press. “There are two people who have been working for a shorter period of time here, didn’t I earn your trust during my time here?”
“It’s not about that, Y/N,” Claire shakes her head.
“Then what is this about?”
“If you are so keen on knowing, we’ve… received a few… complaints.” Your eyebrows shoot up to your hairline, this is the first time you’re hearing about it.
“Complaints?”
“Yes. Some parents are not quite the fan of the kind of mentality you are using while teaching the kids.”
“What are you talking about?” you ask, feeling all the blood rushing out of your face. This is starting to get way too nasty. Claire pinches the bridge of her nose before leaning onto her desk, clasping her hands together.
“I know that you are quite the free spirit and want to teach the kids about openness and acceptance, but not everyone is as rainbow as you are. Some kids brought the word home about what kind of books you’ve been reading and we’ve gotten a few concerns about you basically promoting the LGBTQ community for the kids.”
“I’m not promoting, I’m trying to teach them to accept everyone just the way they are, how can that upset anyone?!”
“Well, it does. The committee had to make a decision on who we should let go and many agreed that it might be the safest decision to make it be… you.”
You’re about to faint. You are sure you are about to fall off this chair and just black out. How can someone get mad about you reading stories about acceptance and treating everyone equally? What kind of monster can see it as a bad thing? And now you are losing your job over such a stupid thing that you don’t even feel responsible for.
Though you’d love to stay and try to convince Claire to not let you go, you know the decision has been made and if you’re being honest, you don’t feel comfortable anymore working at a place where parents tell you off for teaching important values for their kids. Sadly, but you sign all paperwork about your immediate parting and you leave Claire’s office to pack your stuff.
“Miss Y/N! Miss Y/N!” Izzy, one of the sweetest girls in your group basically launches herself at you, smashing against your legs as she hugs you happily. “Do you want to see what I just painted?” She blinks up at you with her gorgeous green eyes and your heart breaks that you won’t get to see her again.
“Oh, Sweetie. I have to—you know what? Sure. Show me your painting,” you smile at her warmly. You can’t say no to her, not when this is the last time you get to see her.
As you’re cleaning out your locker in the break room, Heather walks in and stops in her tracks, seeing you with your gloomy face as you pack everything into a cardboard box.
“What the hell are you doing?” she questions right away. The two of you have known each other for years now, you did the same master’s programme and somehow ended up working here together, carrying on the friendship you’ve formed through your school years.
“I was… fired,” you sigh, wincing at the words.
“What?! Why?”
“Apparently, we are having some budget problems with all the renovations that was made recently and unbeknownst to me, some parents have been complaining about my openness with kids so I was the lucky one to part ways with.”
“That’s fucking bullshit! The kids adore you, how can someone complain about something like that?”
“Don’t know, ask them if you ever find out who they are,” you mumble under your breath as you shut the now empty locker closed. “I’m sorry we can’t carpool anymore,” you pout at her.
“No fucks given about that, what are you gonna do now?” she asks, seemingly very bummed at the news that you won’t be working at the same place now.
“I don’t know,” you shrug. “I guess I’ll have to find something new if I don’t want to end up on the streets,” you mumble.
“Oh girl, I’m so sorry,” Heather sighs pulling you into a hug. “Why don’t we go out for drinks on Friday? Everything is on me!”
“Don’t act like I’m already broke, makes me feel like a loser.”
“Sorry,” she scowls. “Just want to brighten you up a little. Meet me at seven at that Mexican place, how does that sound?”
“Stuffing my face with nachos and tequila? Sounds like the best plan I could wish for.”
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You waste no time arriving home after your worst day at work. You jump right into the job ads, looking for basically anything that might help you out of this impossible situation. Sending your resume to as many places as possible, you get a few callbacks the next few days, but you only make it to one interview on Friday and that doesn’t go well either. The man who calls in for an open position at a private kindergarten turns out to be a total snob and he doesn’t find your free spirit too fitting with the profile of his institution so you get rejected at the end of the interview.
You head out to meet Heather feeling like shit. You’ve been unemployed for four days, but it’s already breaking your spirits.
“You know what? Clair is a bitch for giving in to the complaints,” Heather slams her fourth shot glass on the table with a grimace. “She should have defended you!”
“I’m sure she just didn’t want to get into any disagreement. Some of the parents donate great amounts to the school and Claire would never risk losing that money,” you sigh rolling your eyes.
“Okay, but she is being very… not inclusive,” she narrows her eyes. “Firing someone for teaching the kids openness? Bullshit.”
“I’m just sad I don’t get to see the kids anymore. They really grew close to my heart.”
“The little fuckers can be so damn cute, almost make me want to have one.” Heather sighs, downing another shot before pulling the nachos closer to her. You laugh at her vulgar reaction, she has always had quite a dirty mouth but somehow she controls herself well around the kids. “How has the job hunting been?”
“Horrible,” you growl in frustration. There are not many that offer a good paycheck and the few that does are these posh places that expect you to treat the kids like they are made out of gold which is ridiculous. That’s not how you raise a kid!”
“I’m sorry, I’m sure something will come up soon. Why don’t you look into nanny jobs, have you thought about that?”
“What do you mean?” you furrow your eyebrows, popping some chips into your mouth.
“A lot of people prefer having nannies for their little children, some even want them to move in. My brother’s ex-girlfriend was a live-in nanny for about two years and she earned a shit ton of money, because she didn’t have to pay rent and a good chunk of the food, because the parents just treated her like part of the family and bought groceries for five people instead of four.”
“I’m not sure I’m cut out for that kind of stuff.”
“What, earning money?” Heather scoffs.
“No, living with a stranger.”
“Most of the time the nanny gets like a separated place so it wouldn’t be that bad, but you know what’s good for you. It was just an idea,” she shrugs.
Soon enough you drop any work talk not wanting to ruin the mood. You enjoy some time away from the stress of job hunting and you’re just trying to have fun with your best friend. You start talking about nostalgic memories from college and end up looking up people you graduated with on social media, checking out what they’ve been up to in the past years.
“Alright, I’m gonna go to the restroom quickly, watch out for my drink,” you announce pushing your drink closer to Heather as you head towards the restrooms.
There’s a bit of a line so you stand behind two girls chatting about some cute guy they just met and leaning against the wall you close your eyes for a moment, feeling the drinks hitting you in the head. You’re not used to drinking, haven’t really had the time to get drunk too much lately and it’s saddening to think that now that you’re unemployed, you could black out every day, you wouldn’t have anywhere to show up in the morning.
Getting deep in your thoughts you almost don’t even notice that your phone is buzzing in your pocket. When you finally realize you pull it out of your back pocket and look down at the unknown number with a scowl. You quickly leave your spot in the line and rush out to hear something as you answer the call.
“Hello?”
“Hi, I hope I’m not calling at an inconvenient time, I’m Harry Styles and I’m looking to talk to Y/N Y/L/N?” you hear a thick British accent on the other end of the line.
“This is her.”
“Great. Sorry for the late call, I’m Isabelle’s father.”
“Isabelle?” you ask in confusion, the names not really clicking in your head thanks to the shots you’ve been taking.
“Isabelle Styles? Izzy?”
“Oh! Yes! Sorry, yeah. Mr. Styles, what can I help you with?” you ask, not sure why Izzy’s dad would be calling you.
“Well I just recently learned from my daughter that you’re not working at the daycare any longer?” “Uh, yeah. Unfortunately I was fired this Monday…” you awkwardly answer.
“I’m sorry about that. Izzy has been really sad about it, I wanted to ask if you’ve found a new job already?”
“Not yet, I’ve been looking but I haven’t had much luck yet,” you confess.
“In that case I have an offer to make,” he firmly continues and you perk up at his words. “I’ve been thinking about pulling Izzy out of daycare, but I didn’t want to do it until I found someone to take good care of her. You’ve been her absolute favorite and she’s been devastated since you’ve been gone. If you’re up for a job of this kind, I would like to offer you a spot as Izzy’s nanny.”
“Oh!” is all you react, completely not expecting this call.
“I know there are a lot to discuss, but if you’re interested, I would be more than happy to have a chat with you sometime this weekend? To go over the details and see if we can make it work.”
“I, uh… Um, yeah. We can meet, that sounds good. When would it be good for you?”
“How about tomorrow afternoon?”
“That can work.”
“Amazing!” he beams. “I’ll send you the address through text if that’s alright for you.”
“Yeah, of course. When should I be there?”
“Would three o’clock suit you?”
“Absolutely,” you nod, stunned at the turn of events.
“Great, thank you so much, and once again, sorry to bother you on your Friday evening. Looking forward to see you tomorrow!”
“Thank you, Mr. Styles, see you soon!”
You get back in line at the bathroom and then make your way back to the table where Heather gives you a puzzled look.
“Did you take a massive shit or something?” she jokes as you take your seat and stare back at her, still in shock.
“No, I had a very interesting call, actually.”
“With who?”
“Um, Izzy Styles’ dad just called and offered me a job as her nanny.”
Heather almost chokes on her drink, coughing at the news. You hand her a napkin as she dries her chin off from her cocktail.
“Harry Styles wants you to be the nanny of his daughter?” she gasps.
“You know Izzy’s dad?”
“Y/N, everyone knows him! He is the sexiest man to walk this planet and not to mention that he is like stupidly rich! Have you not seen him yet?”
“Not really,” you shrug. “Izzy was picked up by an old woman most of the times, I guess I never worked when her dad came for her.”
“That explains why you’re not squirming already,” she scoffs. “That man is like… crazy hot, I’m telling you. I bumped into him one morning when I guess he was dropping Izzy off, the way he said ‘Pardon me, Darling’ made my knees shake,” she tells you, faking an accent that’s nowhere near what Mr. Styles sounded like on the phone.
“Well, I guess I’ll see him for myself. I’m meeting him tomorrow to discuss details,” you shrug and Heather slams her hand on the table.
“Oh my God! You’re gonna work for Harry Fucking Styles! Get ready because your panties will be soaking wet all the time,” she laughs like a hyena.
“Heather, stop!” you shake your head laughing too.
Following Mr. Styles’ call you decide to cut the night shorter than you intended, not wanting to look absolutely wasted when you meet him. Arriving home to your small, one bedroom apartment you take a quick shower before climbing to bed, staring up at the ceiling, trying to collect your thoughts. You told Heather you’re not willing to do the whole live-in nanny thing and Mr. Styles might not even want you to live with them, but now that the option is there, you realize it might not be the worst case scenario. Especially since you’re not really swimming in other job offers and you are in desperate need of anything at this point.
Despite having consumed quite some alcohol the previous night, you wake up at a reasonable hour in the morning, finding a text from Mr. Styles about the address you’d have to be going in the afternoon. You make a quick trip to the grocery store and do some chores before you start getting ready for the meeting. You opt for a simple black dress that reaches your knees and pair it with a little funkier, flower printed blazer to bring some color into the outfit.
Punching the address into the GPS you see that it’s taking you to the outer skirt of the city to the neighborhood that’s known to have some quite luxurious estates and you immediately think back to what Heather said about him being ridiculously rich. Driving down the streets in your old Volkswagen you couldn’t stand out more at a place where at least three cars park on the driveways and one of them is a Ferrari or a Porsche.
There’s a massive security gate under the address that’s your destination and it’s left open so you can pull up to the driveway easily. You park next to a fucking Tesla, finding it extremely funny to see your car next to it, but it is what it is. Walking up to the front door you ring the bell as you take a look at the house that can easily considered to be a mansion. Guessing from the outside there are at least about five bedrooms in it and you can only imagine what other luxurious units are squeezed into it.
Soon enough the front door opens and you find yourself staring back at a breathtakingly gorgeous man, wearing a white dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up and black suit pants, his chocolate curls falling to his forehead as his emerald eyes fall on you, a warm smile tugging on his lips.
Shit. Heather was fucking right, you think to yourself swallowing hard.
“Miss Y/L/N, it’s so nice to see you. I’m Harry, Izzy’s dad, come on in!” he invites you inside before a short handshake.
“Nice to meet you too, Mr. Styles.”
“Please, just call me Harry. I don’t like formalities at home,” he asks you as the two of you walk further inside until you arrive to what looks like a living room, but it’s actually the size of your apartment.
“Only if you call me Y/N,” you smile at him and he nods right away.
“Miss Y/N!” you hear a small voice call out and turning around you see Izzy running down the hallway until she throws herself against your legs.
“Oh, hello Sunshine!” you hum, squatting down so you can hug her.
“I missed you!” she pouts, rubbing her eyes.
“I missed you too,” you smile at her, caressing her soft cheeks before standing up. An older lady walks in, the one you’ve seen picking up Izzy. She approaches you with a friendly smile as she extends a hand towards you.
“Hi, I’m Ruth, it’s nice to meet you.” “Y/N, nice to meet you too.”
“Ruth, would you take Izzy outside while I talk to Miss—erm, Y/N here?” Harry requests. Ruth nods and taking Izzy’s hand she lures her outside to look for ladybugs in the backyard and that immediately catches her attention. The two of them leave through the sliding door, giving you and Harry privacy.
“Please, have a seat,” he gestures towards the sectional couch. “Would you like something to drink?”
“I’m good, thank you,” you smile at him as he sits in an armchair across you.
The interior of the house is quite cozy, kind of modern with a hint of vintage touches that make it less rigid, a pop of color showing at most corners so it’s not too monochrome. You quite like it.
“Y/N, I once again apologize for calling you at such an inappropriate hour, but I often work late and I wanted to get in touch with you as soon as possible upon hearing the news.”
“Don’t worry about it, I understand.”
“Isabelle mentioned it to me on Thursday that the other workers told her you no longer work at the daycare so I asked around a little yesterday and was informed that they let you go earlier in the week.”
“It was quite sudden for me as well,” you chuckle lightly, feeling a little anxious to talk about it.
“I know it’s not too appropriate, but I asked why they chose you to part ways with and I have to say it’s outraging that some parents are so ignorant and wayward. I’m really sorry this had to be the reason out of everything.”
“Thank you.” It actually feels nice that he thinks the same, this whole firing was ridiculous and you were losing hope in humanity, but Harry is now very much restoring it.
“Let me walk you through what the situation is here and what I was thinking about.” You nod and listen carefully. “I’m president of a record label and it consumes most of my time, I sometimes work sixty hours a week which I know is not ideal and healthy and I’m trying to change it, but it’s not an easy situation. I thought that putting Izzy into daycare was a good idea, but it’s been getting harder to work around her schedule as a single parent with so much work on my hands. Ruth is a family friend who has been helping tremendously with Izzy, but she is not getting any younger and she would like to retire fully and spend more time with her own grandkids. So I’ve been thinking about hiring a nanny for Izzy and try to make her days work around mine while I’m able to do that. She is going to start preschool in little over a year and I want to spend as much time with her as possible, but it’s not easy when the schedule depends on an institution. When she told me about your firing I had the thought that you might be interested in taking the spot as her nanny. She is obsessed with you, wouldn’t stop talking about what you do every day, and I might have also looked into your professional background. I like what I’ve seen and I’m very much into the way you’ve been dealing with the kids at the daycare. Openness is really important and I want Izzy to grow up in an environment that teaches her about being equal and supportive towards each other. I would be more than happy if you’d be the one taking care of Izzy while I’m not available.”
To say the east you’re stunned at how forward and open he was about the offer and his compliment about your professional background is quite flattering. You can tell he is doing an amazing job at raising Izzy as an open and accepting human, she was always one of the nicest and sweetest kids who always made sure to include all her peers in the games you played. And it’s obvious Harry is not just being a hypocrite, his tattooed arm, painted nails and ring clad fingers are not quite what you’d traditionally imagine a man like him wear, but he does it well and clearly doesn’t give a fuck what others might think about it.
Harry continues with how much he thought you’d be earning for the job and you almost choke on your own saliva. It’s almost three times as much as you’ve been earning at the daycare and you’d be able to save a good chunk every month which is quite amazing.
“I have to ask, were you thinking about a situation where I live with you or I’d have to be coming here every day?”
“Well, essentially it would be the easiest for everyone if you moved in. I have plenty of rooms you could choose from and you’d have access to everything else as well, of course, including the home gym, the pool, the sauna and the entertainment room. But I understand if you are not willing to make that commitment. If you choose to live here you wouldn’t be charged anything, naturally.”
This actually sounds like a dream, moving into this luxury mansion from your cramped little apartment and being able to save the money you’ve been paying on rent.
“And what would be the time management? If I moved in it would easily make me fall into a habit of always working, which is not quite ideal,” you point it out.
“Of course,” he nods. “I like to take care of her morning routine so you’d have to start around nine when I leave to the office. If we can make this deal working I’d like her to start taking some extra classes during the day, moving her activities earlier in the day so her afternoons would be free. She takes piano lessons on Mondays and Wednesdays, a swimming instructor comes here on Thursdays and she is taking French lessons every Tuesday and Friday. Everything takes place here, I would reschedule her activities to take place between nine and twelve. You wouldn’t have to worry about her during those times. You’d cover lunch time and then the afternoons. I try to get home between four and six and just work from home if it’s possible so I can be around her. You’d have to only help out whenever I can’t make it home in time I have urgent works that have to be done from home. We could have dinner time together and then her night time routine is my duty again. Ruth is willing to help me out on Saturdays and I spend Sundays with her strictly without any work distraction so you’d have the weekends off unless something comes up. In those cases I would check in with you beforehand and arrange it however it works best for you.”
You’re speechless for a moment. What he just shared doesn’t seem too bad, you might have to work a lot more, but being one on one with just one kid is much easier than dealing with fifteen of them at once. Not to mention that the money is still amazing compared to what you’d have to be doing.
“I’m gonna be honest with you, it’s an amazing offer. Izzy is such a sweet girl, I would be more than happy to take care of her.”
Harry smiles at you warmly, clearly proud of his daughter, as he should be.
“Can I ask for some time to think about it? It would be a huge commitment.” “Of course. Take your time and let me know whatever your decision is.”
“Thank you.”
Harry offers a quick tour in the house regardless, the kitchen is massive, they have a nice dining area with floor-to-ceiling windows looking out to the green slopes of the backyard that seems to be Izzy’s kingdom. She has a playhouse that could almost function as a real one, the pool is filled with floaties for her and she has her own playground further in the back with slides, monkey bars and a swing set. Your assumptions were almost right about the number of bedrooms. Beside Harry’s master and Izzy’s own room there’s one that’s been used by Ruth, one that’s for Harry’s mother and sister for whenever they are staying over and there are three additional rooms now serving as guest bedrooms, one of those would be turned into your room if you chose to move in. The gym seems better than the one you’ve been going whenever you felt like being a little active, the entertainment room has everything you could ever think about for a room this sort of and the sauna is already calling your name. Living and working here might actually feel like a vacation.
“Miss Y/N! Look what I found!” Izzy runs up to you when you and Harry step out to the backyard, holding her pointing finger up. A ladybug is wandering around her tiny finger, not even bothering with the amazed girl that’s inspecting it.
“Wow! How many dots do you see on it?” you ask and she knits her eyebrows together, counting the black dots.
“Five!”
“Yes, good job!” you ruffle her curls as she smiles up at you proudly. She really is an angel, you’ve grown to like her a lot and you would be lying if you said you didn’t get emotional over thinking about never seeing her again. Being able to take care of her and give her the best possible childhood would be such a dream and the chance to do that is right in front of you.
“I’ll be waiting for your call, Y/N,” Harry smiles at you walking you towards the front door.
“Harry, I don’t think you need to do that,” you speak up and see his face fall, he obviously took it the wrong way, thinking that you want to say no to his offer.
“Oh…”
“It’s not that,” you chuckle softly. “I would love to take the job. And if you’re still okay with that, I’d like to move in, it would make everything just so much easier.”
You watch as his expression changes from disappointed to hopeful as he cracks a smile nodding.
“Yeah, the offer is still there. When do you think you can start?”
“How soon do you want to pull Izzy out of daycare?”
“As soon as possible. If I have to I can go in on Monday and do all the paperwork. You could move in sometime during the week maybe?”
“I have to talk to my landlord about my lease, but I’m fine with moving in during the week,” you nod smiling and you can’t help but feel excited.
“That would be wonderful. Thank you so much. I’m looking forward to working with you.”
You discuss a few more details and then you head out, thinking about how the next time you’ll be coming here, you’ll be moving in.
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“If this one doesn’t go to the donate box, I’m leaving right now.”
Heather holds up a pair of denim shorts, painted in the colors of the flag of the States. She holds it pinched between her index finger and thumb as if it was something nasty and disgusting
“You know I only bought that for that stupid frat party. I never wore that anywhere else, so you can put it into the donate box.”
“Thank God!” she groans and throws the shorts into said box.
It’s Sunday evening and your place looks like a warzone, boxes taking up the place everywhere as you’re packing your life up to officially move into the Styles mansion. You agreed with Harry to bring over a good chunk of your stuff on Monday and then settle in for real on Tuesday. He is pulling Izzy out of daycare first thing on Monday and you’d stay at home with her for the first time on Wednesday. It’s been a fast paced change, but you couldn’t care less. With the amount Harry is gonna pay you, you’ll be able to save up a good chunk every month, like you always wanted to.
As you finish putting your books away you reach the shelves that contain all your photo albums. Photography has been your passion for a long time. It started as a simple hobby sometime through your freshman year in high school, but in senior year, your photos filled the yearbook and you even did the design of it too. You’ve had a few gigs since then, some weddings and pregnancy shoots and you like to sell your photos individually as well. You wouldn’t have imagined how much a simple nature photo costs.
Flipping through the one on the top, you can’t help the bitter smile on your face as you see the photos from your brother’s 14th birthday three years ago. There are tons of family pictures with you, your brother Trevor and your parents, seemingly being all happy and joyful. Things were different back then and you didn’t see anything coming.
It’s past midnight by the time you more or less finish packing, you’ve filled three big boxes with things to donate so you have significantly less stuff to move to the Styles mansion in the morning. Heather spends the night, but leaves early in the morning since she needs to go to work. The moving van you rented out arrives a little after eleven and the two guys from the moving company helps you load it with about two thirds of your stuff. Harry is at work when you arrive and Izzy is still at the daycare, Ruth is the only one at home, she helps you out even though you tell her not to break a sweat over it.
“Let me help, makes me feel needed,” she chuckles sweetly when you try to get her to stop, but she insists on bringing in some smaller bags and boxes.
You’re still unpacking when Ruth arrives back with Izzy a little after four. You hear her little feet tapping against the floor as she runs down the hallway, bursting into your future room.
“Miss Y/N! You’re here!” she cheers, throwing herself into your arms as you sit on the floor, being the perfect level for the little girl.
“I am! How was your day, little Sunshine?”
“We finger painted and I made a painting for daddy, do you want to see it?”
“Of course!”
Izzy disappears to get her backpack from Ruth who is making her some snacks in the kitchen. She soon returns with her painting, presenting it to you proudly.
“Look! This is me and this is daddy!” she points at the two human-like figures, the only thing giving away who is who is that one of them is bigger than the other one. “And then this is mommy!” she then adds, pointing at a star in the upper corner of the painting and you freeze.
In the midst of everything, you didn’t even have the time to question why Harry is a single parent. To be honest your first guess would have been divorce, but Izzy’s painting is telling you something a lot more tragic.
“It’s beautiful,” you smile at her, trying to hide your surprise at the new information. “I’m sure he’ll love it.”
Ruth makes sure Izzy is busy while you finish up unpacking and when you’re about to be done, Harry arrives home. Approaching your room even though the door is open he knocks on the doorframe, catching your attention.
“Hello, just wanted to see how things are going. Do you need help with anything? I’m sorry I couldn’t be here to help with the boxes and all…”
“Hi! Oh don’t worry about that, I had plenty of help,” you shrug smiling. “Everything is going fine, thank you.”
“Great. I did all the paperwork today, tomorrow is going to be Izzy’s last day at daycare. You’re still up to start on Wednesday, right?”
“Yeah, of course. I only have a few things left at home so I’ll be all set by tomorrow.”
“Thank you so much,” he smiles warmly. “And thank you for being so quick about everything. It means a lot to me that I can spend more time with Izzy thanks to you. I really appreciate it.”
“I should be thanking you the opportunity. I wasn’t really drowning in the job offers,” you chuckle making him smile as well. “Please let me know if you want me to change anything, I have a plan I would like to go around with Izzy’s days, but of course, your word is the most important.”
“I trust you to take good care of her during the day. The only thing I want is to have her home when I get home. Ruth couldn’t always pick her up before and I really hated to do the extra trip and pick her up from daycare instead of coming straight home to be with her.”
“Understandable. I’ll make sure to plan accordingly,” you nod smiling.
“Y/N, I want you to feel home as much as possible. This is your place just as much as it is ours now. Izzy and I go grocery shopping every Sunday, it’s kind of a father-daughter thing we do every week. We keep a list on the fridge, feel free to add whatever you need and we’ll get it.”
You can’t help the smile that stretches across your lips, because this is such a sweet thing to do, when Harry could easily afford someone to do the work for him. Yet he still uses this time to be with his daughter.
“Yeah, sure, thank you!”
“I’ll get out of your hair now. Would you like to stay for dinner?”
“Oh, no, but thank you. I still have some things to take care of before tomorrow.”
“Alright,” he nods before walking out. He leaves you thinking hard about him. You wonder what really happened to Izzy’s mom and if he is dating someone right now. A man like him is basically a dream to any woman, you doubt he is having a hard time finding a partner, but you haven’t seen any sign of another woman around the house. Guess you’ll have to wait and figure it out yourself.
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The apartment is awfully empty on your last night here. When you moved in about a year ago you didn’t think you’d be moving into a mansion from here. You spend the evening cleaning out a bit so you leave the place in good condition. Your landlord was terribly nice about your early leave, you could easily agree that you’d pay for the two more weeks that’s left from the month and that would be all, no extra costs for moving out before your lease was up.
You’re cleaning off the kitchen counter when your phone starts ringing, it’s a video call from your brother.
“Hey there! What’s up?” you ask, propping up the phone on top of the microwave while you move around, doing your thing. Trevor seems to be lying in bed, a black hoodie covering his upper body.
“Hello, just wanted to see how the moving has gone today.”
Despite the ten year age gap between you and Trevor, your relationship couldn’t be better. Probably because you were old enough to see what a blessing a sibling really is when he was born.
“Everything went smoothly. I only have a few stuff to bring over, that can fit into my car tomorrow, so it’s fine.”
“Cool. How is the dude? What was his name again?”
“Harry. Harry Styles.” You see him pull his laptop to his lap and probably searches up Harry’s name before his eyes widen at the screen.
“This dude is big! He is the president of HES Records, they run some of the most popular singers these days.”
“Yeah? I was sure he is a big name judging from his mansion,” you chuckle.
“Have you looked him up yet?”
“Not really.” “Want me to read what’s here about him?”
“Sure,” you hum, continuing to clean while you listen to Trevor.
“Alright. Apparently he is thirty-one, took over the record company when he was just twenty-five because his father wanted to retire early. The number of talents working under the label has doubled since he has taken over and many of his clients have won Grammy Awards. Impressive,” he hums, scrolling down on whatever site he has just found. “He is known to be a private person, the last time he made an appearance… Oh shit…” Trevor breathes out and you turn to your phone with furrowed eyebrows.
“What?”
“Wow, this shit is heavy. It says the last time he made a public appearance was in 2017, not long before his wife was killed in a car accident.”
You freeze, feeling your stomach drop to the floor, immediately thinking back at Izzy’s painting of her family. It very much makes sense why she said the star was her mother, it must be the way Harry explained to her what happened to her mother.
“It happened in 2018, she wasn’t in the fault, a drunk driver ignored the red light and ran into her car at a crossroad. This is terrible, oh God.”
“Poor Izzy, she probably doesn’t even know what really happened.”
“Must have been hard on him, there’s not much about him since then.”
“Can’t blame him for not wanting to be in the spotlight after losing his wife.”
“Yeah.”
Trevor shows you a few pictures of him from years ago, he has always been handsome, but your favorites are the few from the times when he had long hair. He looked so different, like a whole other person, but still, he rocked it perfectly.
Then you show Trevor around in the empty apartment before loving to the couch, turning all your attention to him.
“How have things been?” you ask with a sigh. Trevor purses his lips and shrugs.
“Other than the constant screaming matches on the phone and endless fights every time dad comes over for more of his stuff? Everything is rainbows and butterflies.”
“Is it really that bad?” you scowl.
“It’s like they never run out of stuff to throw at each other, but I feel like this much couldn’t happen even in their twenty-eight years together,” he scoffs making you chuckle.
“I’m sorry you’re stuck in the middle of all that.”
“It’s like payback,” he hums and you give him a puzzled look. “You had it bad growing up for being the surprise baby, making them teen parents. Then I came at a reasonable time, they already knew the drill, but now that you’re out of the house I’m getting all the shit, having to deal with their divorce.”
“I’m really sorry, Trev,” you sigh, feeling guilty that he is all alone at home.
“It’s fine, I don’t blame you,” he shrugs. “But you could make it better if you asked your millionaire boss if I could hang out at his house sometimes.” He grins at you slyly and you roll your eyes. Of course he is already thinking about using you for his own good!
“I don’t want to push the boundaries just yet, but I’ll see what I can do.”
You talk a little more about school and what he’s been up to with his friends before ending the call. You take a shower and go to bed right away, feeling extremely worn out from all the packing you’ve done through the day.
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The next day you pack the remainder of your stuff into your car and then your landlord comes over to do a checkup, though he fully trusts you took good care of the place.
“Again, thank you for your understanding, I didn’t plan to leave so early, but it just kinda came up,” you tell him, handing him over your keys.
“Don’t worry about it. I hope your new place will treat you right,” he smiles kindly at you.
You chat a little longer before you leave and head over to your new home. Once again, Ruth is the only one home and being the angel that she is, she helps you to carry your stuff up from the car before leaving to get Izzy from daycare. Since there’s not much left to unpack you finish quite fast, leaving you some extra time alone in the house. Walking around you try to learn your way around, still finding it a bit of a maze. You find Harry’s home office’s door open and after a bit of hesitation you step inside, just taking a look around. Yeah, it’s kind of a nosy thing to do, but you couldn’t help yourself.
His space is quite clear, he keeps his stuff neatly organized. Certificates and plaques are hung up on the wall, showing off his many successes in the business. There’s a huge bookcase near his desk and there you see some family photos… ones that include his late wife as well.
She was beautiful. There’s a picture of the three of them in the hospital from the day Izzy was born, Harry has an arm around his wife’s shoulders who is holding baby Izzy, both of them radiating happiness as they just become parents. Your heart breaks when you see the photo next to it, it’s just Harry and her in Paris, the Eiffel tower standing tall behind them as they are grinning widely at each other, foreheads touching. Harry has his arms wrapped around her slim figure while she is hugging his neck. They look so happy and in love, like they were always meant to be with each other. Knowing what tragedy hit them is just hard to process even for you, who never even met the woman.
You hear the front door open and Izzy is laughing at something, so you rush out before anyone could catch you snooping around.
“Hi Miss Y/N!” she chirps upon seeing you when you meet them in the living room.
“Izzy, you don’t have to call me Miss Y/N, Y/N is perfectly fine,” you smile at her, caressing her rosy cheeks.
“Okay. Ruth, can I please have some ice-cream?”
“I’m afraid we ran out of ice-cream, but I’ll put it on your grocery list,” Ruth tells her, a pout tugging on Izzy’s lips.
“How about this: I’m gonna make a delicious smoothie, that’s almost like melted ice-cream, would you like some?” you offer and her eyes brighten up immediately, nodding right away.
While Ruth puts away Izzy’s things they brought home from daycare, while the two of you move to the kitchen to make the smoothie together. You find some frozen berries in the freezer and pair them with bananas, putting them all into the blender with oatmilk, blending it all together.
“How is it?” you ask Izzy, who is sitting on top of the counter, tasting the pink smoothie that leaves a cute little mustache above her cherry lips.
“I like it!” she smiles, scrunching her nose.
“We can make it some other time then,” you smile, drinking up your portion.
Izzy is dancing around the kitchen, babbling about her last day at daycare while you clean the glasses and the blender when Harry arrives. He is wearing a baby blue suit with a crispy dress shirt underneath, looking fashionable but still business appropriate at the same time.
“Daddy!” Izzy launches towards her daddy, who catches her, throwing her into the air before holding her in his arms, joining you in the kitchen.
“Hey baby. How was your day?”
“Good, all my friends hugged me but I told them we would meet in the park.”
“That’s right, and I have the number of all your friends’ parents, we can have playdates with them whenever you want to,” he smiles before his eyes meet yours. “Hi Y/N, everything went well with the rest of your moving?”
“Yeah, I’m all set,” you smile back at him.
“That’s great. I have a few calls to make, but I’ll be done in thirty probably. Would you mind looking out for Izzy in the meanwhile?”
“Of course. She promised me to take me around her room, so we could do that, what do you say?” you ask the little girl who nods in excitement.
Harry disappears in his office and Izzy pulls you to her room, showing you just about every toy she owns. Her room is a typical girl’s room, the walls are painted a light pink color, her bedframe resembles a castle and she has a dollhouse as big as your previous bathroom. Harry clearly spoils her rotten, but what you noticed is that she is not one of those annoying bratty only children who can’t take no. She was clearly taught how to behave and always listen to the adults.
While Izzy is putting her stuffed animals away after introducing you to all of them, you spot a photo frame near her bed, decorated with macaroni. You remember when you all did that together at daycare and now you get to see the photo that ended up behind the glass.
It’s a photo of Izzy and her mother, she was just a baby and doing quick math in your head you realize it must have been not long before her accident, might even be the last picture taken of the two of them. Her mom is smiling at the camera while Izzy is sleeping in her arms peacefully. Izzy looked a lot like her when she was a baby, the bridge of her nose and her lips resembled her mother’s, though now she appears to take more after her dad with her chocolate curls and piercing green eyes.
“That’s my mommy,” she tells you when she sees you looking at the photo.
“It’s a nice picture,” you smile at her, trying your best to hide how heartbroken you feel even just looking at the photo.
“Daddy said she had to go up to the sky, but she is watching me from there,” she explains, clearly not entirely sure what it means, but you can tell she misses her. “Daddy said she is living between the stars now and that she loves me very much.” You need to fight your tears back at her words.
“I’m sure of that too,” you breathe out smiling at her.
“Izzy, do you want to help me make dinner?” Harry walks in smiling, though it disappears for a moment when he sees the two of you looking at the photo of his wife, but he is quick to control himself.
“Yes! What are we making?” she runs over to him, jumping up and down.
“Uh, chicken and veggies.”
You step away from the photo, pretending like nothing just happened. You’re dying to discuss it with Harry, hear him talk about it, but you won’t push him. If he wants to share it, he’ll come to you.
“Alright, come on then,” he smiles down at her. “Thank you for watching her, I’ll take over from here. Food will be ready in about an hour, Ruth is staying with us as well,” he informs you.
“Great, I’ll… I’ll be in my room,” you nod.
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The first two weeks on the job brush past smoothly. It takes you some time to get used to your new home, but taking care of Izzy doesn’t feel like work, so you’re feeling amazing in your new job. You easily fall into a schedule with her.
The mornings are always Harry’s duty. He wakes her up around seven-thirty, makes her breakfast and dresses her for the day before he leaves around nine. Thanks to this habit of his, you’re able to sleep in until eight, leaving you plenty of time to get ready for your day with Izzy before Harry has to leave. Depending on the weather, the two of you then either take over the back yard or move to her room for some play time before her class of the day starts in the noon. Piano with Rosaline on Mondays and Wednesdays, French lesson with Lyon on Tuesdays and Fridays and then Izzy’s favorite on Thursdays, swimming class with Kitty.
Izzy loves to help in the kitchen so you usually make lunch together. Once her tummy is full she takes a nap before you sit down to learn something new every day. You’ve been teaching her the numbers and the alphabet, or some days you just talk about anything that interests her and learn at least two things she hasn’t know yet, all through games so she doesn’t even realize what you’re doing. You’re usually done by around three, leaving you time to take a visit to the park, if Harry is not planning to take her himself later that day.
You’re strictly home by four, unless it’s Tuesday when she has her dance class until five. Those days you drive her to her class, run some quick errands and pick her up. Harry usually uses his extra time in the office on these days, but he is always home by six to have dinner together with his daughter.
Once Harry is home you’re off duty, though you like to stay close, not just in case something comes up for Harry, but because you genuinely like spending time with Izzy and Harry, seeing them interacting.
Harry sometimes has to work on Saturdays as well, but just as he promised Ruth is always here to take over duty on those days, leaving you free for the whole weekend. It’s been working perfectly for you and those very few concerns you had about moving in dissolve quite fast as soon as you start working.
Though it’s been pretty clear to you before, you now one hundred percent sure that Harry is living for his daughter. She is always a priority, he doesn’t hesitate to decline any work calls he gets in the evenings if Izzy needs him, if she is a little fussy and wants her daddy’s attention or when they are in the middle of a game. He is clearly trying to keep a balance between his work and role as a father and from what you’ve seen, it seems like he is doing an amazing job in that. However you haven’t learned much else about him. He is all friendly towards you, but makes sure to keep it business casual, not quite keen on getting to know each other better as just friends, maybe.
A Friday afternoon you’re having a little tea party in the backyard with Izzy when Harry arrives home, but this time, he is not alone. Through the sliding door you spot him with a blonde guy who is talking very articulately as Harry is typing on his phone. The man looks about Harry’s age, but you can’t tell if he is a friend or a business partner, but if Harry brought him home, he is more likely to be a friend of his.
“Uncle Niall!” Izzy gasps when he spots the man through the glass and abandoning the tea party, she starts running towards the door. The man spots her and slides the door open grinning widely before she jumps into his arms.
“Little bugger! How are ya?” the man laughs, holding Izzy in a tight hug before leaning back to take a good look at her. You notice his thick Irish accent and it suits his appearance quite well. You head inside as well, in case Harry needs Izzy busy for a little longer, though he doesn’t mind having her around, kissing the top of her head before finishing up whatever he was doing on his phone, watching Niall and Izzy smiling.
“I’m having a tea party with Y/N, wanna join?” Izzy invites the man, who then looks at you for the first time, smiling widely.
“Hi, I’m Y/N, Izzy’s new nanny,” you introduce yourself, holding out a hand that he shakes, keeping Izzy in his other arm without a problem.
“Nice to meet ya, I’m Niall.”
“Y/N, Niall is an old friend of mine. He is joining us for dinner, hope you don’t mind,” Harry informs you and you find it funny how he is kind of asking for your approval when it’s his house.
“Not at all.”
“Harry has told me he hired a pair of new hands to help, but he didn’t mention it’s a stunning young woman!” Niall beams, making you blush right away.
“Ni, I would appreciate it if you didn’t try to pick up my daughter’s new nanny,” Harry warns him lightly, though there’s some firmness in his tone, not that it scares Niall in any way, he even winks at you.
“Oh come on, you can’t expect me not to flirt when you surround yourself with so many pretty women! First Ruth and now Y/N!”
You smile at him, something is telling you he wasn’t joking and he tried to flirt with Ruth as well. Harry just rolls his eyes at his friend, taking Izzy from him.
“Keep it in your pants, Niall,” Harry tells him and though it’s nothing vulgar, it catches Izzy’s attention.
“What should he keep in his pants?” she questions, making your and Harry’s eyes grow big right away. Luckily, Niall keeps his cool and takes care of the situation.
“My attitude, Sweetie. Your daddy is just jealous because I’m more handsome than he is,” he smirks at the little girl, successfully avoiding an awkward conversation about what it is that Niall should keep in his pants.
You smile at his reply, even though you are not that sure about the comparison he just made between himself and Harry.
“Izzy, do you want to continue the tea party?” you ask her and even though just a minute ago she was inviting Niall to join her, now she shakes her head no. “Alright, I’ll pack it up then.”
“Oh, don’t worry about it. We’ll do it, right Izzy? She brought it all out, she is going to be the one packing it up,” Harry reminds her and she nods.
The two of them move outside to put her little tea set back into the basket she keeps it in, leaving you and Niall alone.
“So Y/N, how did you end up here?”
“I was working at Izzy’s daycare, but they sent me away not long ago. Then Harry contacted me and offered the job which was a lifesaver, truly.”
“That’s great! Well, not that you got fired, but that you ended up here. I know it means a lot for Harry that he can spend more time with Izzy, you’re making everything a lot easier for him.” Niall walks over into the kitchen and grabs a water for himself as he leans against the counter. “I can see that he is a lot more relaxed now already.”
“Really?” you ask, surprised.
“Yeah. I know he always used to stress about picking Izzy up, or forgetting something the daycare asked for. Now he can make it all work just how he wants to, that fits him a lot more. It hasn’t been easy on him since Maggie’s death.”
This is the first time you hear anyone talk about Harry’s wife and now you just learned her name. Maggie.
“Being a single parents is never easy,” you add with a soft smile, not wanting to interrogate Niall about Maggie. It’s Harry’s place to tell you about her, if he wants to, of course.
Soon enough Izzy and Harry take over the kitchen, Niall helping them this time and you leave them alone, taking some time for yourself in your room. Later you go out to check if there’s anything you could help with, Harry asks you to set the table as he finishes up the cooking.
“So, Y/N. Tell me a little bit about yourself!” Niall asks you over dinner.
“Um, what do you want to know?” you ask, feeling a little flustered to be in the spotlight.
“I don’t know, family, friends, hobbies?”
“Well, I have a younger brother, Trevor. He is seventeen and already taller than me.”
“Oh, that seems like a big age gap.”
“Ten years, to be exact,” you nod. “He was planned, I wasn’t,” you add with a soft chuckle. “But we have a great relationship, so it’s all good. We talk almost every day.”
“I’m sure you’ll get well along with Gemma then!” Niall beams, glancing at Harry.
“Gemma is my sister,” Harry explains. “Though she is not that much older than me.”
“But you can bond over being stuck with a younger brother who outgrew you,” Niall jokes making all three of you laugh.
All through dinner you realize how different Niall is from Harry, but in a good way. While Harry is more quiet and calm, Niall is kind of all over the place, buzzing and chatting every chance he got, but the two of them make a great pair, bringing what the other doesn’t have to the table.
After dinner you attempt to leave them again, but Niall makes you stay as they open a glass of wine. Harry puts on a movie for Izzy to keep her busy, giving the three of you a chance to sit out at the terrace from where you still can keep an eye on the little girl inside.
“Alright, Y/N. When are we going on our first date then?” Niall asks out of the blue, a cocky smile tugging on his lips.
“Niall, for fuck’s sake,” Harry breathes out as you let out an awkward chuckle.
“What? I think there’s some electricity going on between us.”
“I, uhh—I don’t…”
“Please don’t turn me down!” he sighs dramatically, making you smile.
“You’ve been great company, but I’m not sure we should go out,” you tell him. He huffs in disappointment, but it’s clear he didn’t take it to his heart.
“Is it because you’re taken? I didn’t even ask, are you dating anyone? You can’t be engaged, because I don’t see any rings,” he points out, nodding towards your naked fingers, however his words make you suck on your breath.
“I’m not engaged. Not anymore,” you admit and you watch their eyes go wide at the information.
“Wait, you’ve been engaged before?” Harry asks, clearly surprised, if not shocked.
“Yeah. For about four months,” you nod, running your tongue over your lips as you reach for your wine, taking a few large gulps.
“And what did the fucker do?” Niall bluntly questions, earning a look from Harry. “What? I’m just curious what twat it takes to lose a woman like her!”
“Maybe she doesn’t want to talk about that,” Harry presses, but you shrug.
“It’s not a secret. We dated for about two years before he proposed. I said yes, started planning the wedding and everything, then found out that he had been cheating on me with his assistant for about a year. We broke up, simple as that. It’s in the past, happened a year ago.”
“That’s some next level asshole bullshit,” Niall shakes his head while Harry is just staring at you with an unreadable look before he turns his attention at his glass, still clearly deep in his thoughts and you wonder what he thinks of you now. Here is the loser who not only got cheated on, but lost her job, all of that just in one year.
Harry doesn’t react, and a moment later Izzy comes out because she is thirsty, so daddy duties call him away. Niall stays a little, but heads home soon as well.
“It was nice meeting you, Y/N. The date still stands though,” he smirks when he pulls back from the short hug he enveloped you in.
“Alright,” you chuckle, slowly getting used to his flirty act.
You was the wine glasses and head back to your room while Harry walks Niall out and then takes Izzy upstairs to give her a bath. You don’t cross paths until later when you leave your room, already in your pajama pants and an oversized t-shirt to grab some water for yourself and he walks out of Izzy’s room just then, probably done with putting her to sleep.
“I’m sorry if Niall made you uncomfortable, he didn’t mean to be rude or anything,” he apologizes as the two of you walk together.
“Oh, don’t worry about it,” you chuckle softly. “It was kind of a boost to my ego, if I’m being honest.”
Harry huffs with a smile and stops at the kitchen island, his fingers tapping on his lips as you grab yourself a bottled water.
“I’m… I’m sorry about… about what you told us earlier.”
Closing the fridge you look at him, seeing that he is kind of hesitant, like he is not sure he should have spoken up, but you appreciate the thought.
“It’s alright. Just water under the bridge,” you shrug.
“I just feel bad you had to go through that.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” you chuckle softly. “It sucked, yeah. I really thought I would live happily ever after with Keith, but instead I got a lesson.”
“A lesson?”
“When we broke up I was obviously on the floor, both literal and theoretical way. I thought it was my fault, that I did something wrong and that’s why he did what he did. I even thought that I’m not worthy of being loved and being in love again. Took me time to realize that no matter what happened, I still deserve to be happy and to find someone to love and who can love me back.”
It appears that your words touch him deep, staring back at you, he just nods shortly, not replying to anything you just said. You’re not sure he is so silent because he doesn’t really understand what you just talked about or if it hit too close to home. Whatever it is, he keeps it to himself.
“Good night, Harry,” you smile at him before walking out of the kitchen and up into your room.
You’re lying in bed already when you hear him open his room’s door and then close it and suddenly he is all you can think about. The way his eyes sometimes pierce down on you, the way he taps his fingers against his lips when he is thinking hard or the proud smile that always plasters across his face whenever he is watching Izzy do basically anything. But you do see some pain in those beautiful green eyes of his and your desire to take just the smallest fracture of it away grows, even though he is not showing any sign that he is willing to share it with you.
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The next morning, despite having the day off, you wake up quite early. You toss and turn, try to fall back asleep a little longer, but you just can’t. It’s a nice, warm morning and you decide to take advantage of the little balcony attached to your room. Wrapping yourself in your fluffy robe you grab the book you started reading a few days ago and sit out, enjoying the morning Sun that’s shining right at you on the balcony.
You don’t even realize for a while that you’re not the only early riser. When your eyes wander down to the big oak tree that’s near Izzy’s playground, you spot Harry doing what appears to be yoga on a green mattress, wearing nothing else, just a pair of black shorts. No shirt.
For a moment you think about going inside, feeling like you’re invading his privacy in a way, but you have the right to enjoy the morning Sun on your balcony, it’s not your fault he decided to have yoga at the exact same time. And it’s just hard not to look at his shirtless body stretching in all directions, twisting and turning as he goes through the motions, his tattooed body on full display.
It’s been clear since the moment you laid eyes on him for the first time that Harry is probably the most beautiful man you’ve ever met and that includes all your exes. Paired with his kind of mysterious charisma and the way he takes care of his daughter, he is the whole package, but you have been busy with Izzy to dwell too long on how attractive he really is. But right now, you are not working and he is very much shirtless in the backyard, teasing you with thoughts you definitely shouldn’t be thinking about when it comes to your boss.
A shaky breath leaves your mouth as you let yourself watch him just for a few more minutes before heading back inside, not wanting to get busted for being a stalker and also not wanting to see him in more positions and have even more unholy thoughts about him.
But what you don’t know is that just as you step inside, Harry catches your figure disappearing in your room, knowing well you saw him too.
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Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!
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sakasakiii · 3 years
Note
Do you have any original characters? Whether for Tolkien or in general
hello nonnie!!! eeeeee i was actually really surprised and excited to receive this ask! LONG POST INCOMING warning cuz its time for Rin's Ramblings again
i do have two ocs actually! although i haven't paid them much mind up until recently 😂 I wanted to write Ithilos as an extra healer into that one AO3 story where Elrond performs emergency surgery on Maedhros (and i never did!!!). Marildë came from a concept headcanon I had waaay back in January where I was obsessed with the thought of Maglor having kids (twins??) of his own back in Valinor, but unfortunately being unaware that his wife was pregnant up until just before he had to depart to M.E with the Noldor (something that eats him up like crazy but hasn't been able to tell anyone but Maedhros)
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heheh so yeyeye... these are my Tolkien ocs!!! although they had been banished to the Void of my mind up til u asked hehe. When it comes to OCs I absolutely ADORE though, @astral-romances has Aredhel's triplet children I have had utter the delight of getting to know better recently, so go check them out if you haven't already!! (they are so SO cute pls stan Walya and Canyo) 🥺
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now in response to the second part!! i uh,, i do have non-Tolkien ocs actually 👉👈 i wont go on about them too much here lolol, but ill place the rest under the cut due to it not rly fitting in with the theme of this blog!
when i was a fandom drifter last year i used to work on my own stories WAY more, but now that I've been into the Silm consistently (its the longest fandom I've ever stayed in cuz it has such a lovely community!!) I barely draw them anymore... but here are some sketches of assorted ocs from all my various stories:
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they all come from different ones, but all exist in the same overarching world... I won't ramble about it too much here, but I do have a side blog where I sometimes dump old sketches/art I find when I'm digging through my sketchbooks for archiving purposes. So the stuff there is probably way more detailed than my response here!
still though, THANK YOU NONNIEeeEE im so very flattered you asked!! sorry I ended up rambling more than answering your question LMAOOO but im very grateful i had a chance to talk about these guys for a lil while!! 💓💓 thanks again and i hope u have a wonderful rest of your week!
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pvrpleblccd · 3 years
Text
Promise.
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pairing : shuntaro chishiya x f reader
tw : angst, unresolved grief, death, mentions of death, blood, violence (beating up someone), chishiya being violent
a/n : this is my first post- cndovn- but i am currently having a massive crush on this man right here <3 ALSO CHISHIYA GIVES ME MASSIVE KENMA VIBES (im sorry for the typos, i wrote this at 4 am-)
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There he was again, sitting at the edge of the rooftop of the Beach, hoods on and hands in his white Nike zip up sweater, well, it was given to him. He looked down to see all of the horny animals dancing and living their life as if it was their last day. Chishiya sighed, ‘Everyone looks like their all about to die, as always.’
It was a beautiful day in this cruel country. But it’s just like any other day, people will die tonight, either because their visa will expire or die during a game. Dying in a game, probably the worst death here. Chishiya sighed again and took a deep breath, trying to erase all negativity going through his head. Though, there’s one thing that he can’t get out of his head.
“Hey, Chishiya.”
Chihsiya whipped his head to where he heard the voice. He was about to call her name, but he only saw Kuina at the door of the rooftop entrance, looking at Chishiya with a confused look. ‘Ah... I’m still hearing her voice, I must be crazy.’
“An told me you guys had a meeting, I’m just here to rely the message to you.”
The blonde male nodded and stood up, making his way to where Kuina was. No words were exchanged between the both of them, though Kuina noticed the slight mood change the male had every now and then. There are times where he’s cocky, would always slide comment when he had the chance, had his guard up, and times where he just became more reserved than ever and was cold and gloomy.
Kuina noticed, but never dared prying on it, not wanting to get on the intelligent man bad side.
Chishiya on the other side, he zipped up the white hoodie he loved very much. He entered the meeting room and sat at his place, like always, though he kept a pokerface while hugging the hoodie he was wearing. He felt several pair of eyes on him, not on him, but the zip up he was wearing. No one dared to say anything, though Niragi wasn’t having it.
“Chishiya. Were you really obligated to wear that zip up when we’re in a meeting?!”
Niragi shouted from his place, gripping hard the rifle he had in his hand. No one budge or said anything, even Hatter looked at Chishiya, both with envy and anger in his eyes.
“It was given to me. Why whouldn’t I wear it? If you’re thinking that we should share it, you, out of everyone in this room, that I don’t share what I own. And plus, if we shared it, you’d only get blood on it and dirty it, y/n managed to keep it white and as clean as possible. I won’t let your stupidity ruin it.”
“You wouldn’t know what y/n would have wanted!” Niragi stood up and pointed his rifle at the blonde male.
“I knew y/n longer than you.”
“We were still close!”
“To someone like you? I don’t think so, you’re a complete psycho, Niragi.”
“Give it a break! We’re all mourning Chishiya, espicially An! So what the hell do you mean, y/n-”
“Y/n is dead.” Last Boss said while looking at the arguing males.
The room was even more quiet than it ever was, not only with the statement, but for the bald tattooed male to speak up and empathized the dead made them slightly uncomfortable. With no one saying a thing for a minute or two, Mira stood up and talked about the card they were able to collect and that they haven’t gotten news ones for a while. An talked about the medical supplies and that she was running out from it, Hatter asked Aguni and his Militants to accompany An for a short run to grab all supplies they can gather.
She was the first one to leave, the meeting room which was understandable. When no one said anything, Hatter talked about adding a new rule. Rule number three, death to traitors.
Soon after, the meeting was done.
The blonde male made his way to his room, opening the door he saw a familiar figure sitting on his bed, when he blinked the figure was gone. Chishiya closed his room door and laid on his bed, looking at the ceiling. He never felt so confused and empty in his entire life. He never wanted to deal with anyone’s emotions or feelings, let alone his. But upon on thinking and thinking, he came to a conclusion he now only realized.
How much he loved y/n.
“Damn it. This hurts... This sucks.”
Too tired and exhausted to think, Chishiya closed his eyes and embraced the darkness that surrounded him.
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“Chishiya?” A voice called out.
The blonde male turned his head, seeing a petite figure looking at him as if he was a ghost. He looked at her from head to toe and his eyes grew wide, he instantly got up and hugged the petite figure.
“Y/n?” He said in a weak voice.
The petite figure sighed in relief and hugged the male back, while letting out a small sob. They were currently in an abandonned mall, gathering food and necessities to get through the night. Y/n came back with a ton of canned food and water, while Chishiya came back with the others things they needed, such as flashlights and batteries and other things.
The both of them were catching up upon missed times and Chishiya kept eyeing on how she was dressed, grey sweatpants with a nike zip up and what looked like a swimsuit top, and the pink locker bracelet around y/n wrist. The numbers 009 was on the bracelet and the girl knew he was looking at it.
“What’s the most recent game you completed?” The petite girl asked.
“Six of diamonds, how about you?” Chishiya said, eating the canned peach. He didn’t noticed the slight spark in y/n’s eyes, but she smiled.
“Nine of hearts.” Y/n said and took a bite of her food.
A comfortable and peaceful silence was set between the two until the girl broke it.
“I want to take you somewhere.”
~
“Hatter, I want him to be part of the executives.”
Y/n said right after they all welcomed her back. All of them looked at her with confused and looked at Chishiya then back at y/n. The girl only smiled and put all of cards she collected on the table. Chishiya couldn’t believe the amount of cards she had in her possession, there was 14 cards in total.
“Chishiya cleared a diamonds game and is the lone survivor, I highly believe that his skills can be very useful to us. Also, I have known him before entering the Borderland. He is like a precious gem, full of hidden talents!”
She said while putting her hands in her grey sweatpants.
The blonde male was taken aback by the sudden praise, but dind’t show it. The others turned their attention to Chishiya, hearing the praise from y/n made them have a base opinion on Chishiya, he was smart and must not be harmed. Hatter started to explain the two rules to Chishiya and handed him a blue locker bracelet with the number 011 on it.
“Enjoy the Beach!”
~
After Chishiya settled in the Beach for a couple of weeks, he and y/n grew closer than they ever were before. The two of them became inseparable.
During one night, Chishiya and y/n were hanging out in the lobby, they were part of the first teams that finished early. Chishiya lost his other hoodie, blood was splattered on it, due to a player clung onto him begging him to help him and his collar went off.
In short words, he was currently shirtless. Y/n trying her best not to look, couldn’t help, but take a peek, thought the blonde male caught her.
“Like what you see?”
He said with a grin plastered on his face. Out of embarrassment, she took off her white Nike zip up and handed it to Chishiya, who watched her with an amused expression.
“H-here...! It’s yours now..!” She said and sprinted to elsewhere.
Chishiya sat there smiling at himself and decied to put the zip up on. He got up from his place and went off to find y/n. A part of him starting to worry, since it’s been an hour and he hasn’t found the petite girl yet. He passed the lobby at least three or four times, that’s when he started asking around.
With no one knowing where the girl was, he even asked Niragi, he too was worried so they both went on their sides to find her. Chishiya went outside and started to walk around the perimeter until he heard an oh so familiar voice coming form the sketchy alleyway.
“Were you hiding the cards from Hatter?”
“So what if I was?! I had to watch my friends die in front of me to be able to get this card! I’m not giving it to some cult leader or whatever he is!”
Chishiya rushed to the voices and saw one of the new militants holding three cards in his left hands and a gun in this right. Y/n tried to reason with the boy, but it only seemed to boil his blood even more, to the point he raised his gun. Chishiya ran to y/n side and hid her behind him, y/n on the other side was surprised.
“Put the gun down... You’re pointing it at the most important person apart from Hatter.” Chishiya tried calm the boy down, but didn’t work.
“Y/n... You remember Kirika? She was close to you right? Did you know that she gave her life up so that I can survive the game? Her last words were, ‘Tell y/n, thank you... I love you Aki-kun.’ She gave her life for me because she loved me!”
Aki broke down crying, falling on his knees and letting out pained screams. Y/n came forward tears falling down her cheek and approached Aki and gave him a hug. She careful put the gun down and caressed the top of Aki’s head.
“Kirika was a wonderful person, Aki, she was-“
Y/n sentence was cut abruptly and Chishiya took a step wondering why y/n suddenly stopped talking, he took another stop forward, his eyes widening seeing Aki’s hands was covered in blood and held a knife. He dropped the knife and moved his hand to grab the gun next to him.
“You’re all Hatter’s soldier. We have to end this, I have to end it.”
Aki grabbed the gun and slowly got up, hair covering his eyes. While Chishiya looked at how y/n’s body fell to the side and seeing a dark substance staining her grey sweatpants. A small pool of her own blood was starting to form underneath her.
Chishiya looked at Aki who was still mumbling things, but he saw red. The blonde grabbed the closest thing to him, which was a metal pipe, and ran towards Aki, hitting him with it, unable to stop himself.
Chishiya’s blood was boiling, he never felt so angered in his entire life. He kept on swining the pipe, hitting a part of Aki’s body every time. His vision was red, he couldn’t even hear the screams of his victim. What brought him back was Aguni taking off the metal pipe off of his hands. Chishiya’s face was unrecognizable, it was full of hatred, sadness, anger and disgust. Aguni never saw such expression on the male’s face before, he always looked so calm and preserved.
Something caught Chishiya off guard when he looked at Aguni. His eyes were red, as if he was holding himself back not to cry, that’s when he remembered y/n. He turned around to see An trying to stop the bleeding from y/n’s wound, but the blood was coming out and went through all of the amount of cloth that was put on it.
The blonde male rushed towards y/n’s side caressed her face while shaking his head. Tears fell on the girl’s cheek while Chishiya was telling y/n to stay with him. He soon looked at An and she was trying everything she could, all of the sudden, a small and tired voice caught his attention.
“S...shuntaro...? Ri-chan..?”
The blonde male whipped his head to look at y/n. She was smiling. Why was she smiling? She was dying, but she was still smiling. Chishiya tried to understand her, but couldn’t.
“S-spending my... last moments.. with the ones I love.. Shun... taro... I’m sorry... but pro..mise me... you’ll live, okay?”
“W..why are you saying sorry.. No. We both survive okay? Look... An... An will take care of you okay?”
Y/n turned weakly looked over the forsenic, who was doing her best to keep the petite girl alive. They made an eye contact, y/n let out a pained sigh while An shook her head. Y/n was trying to stay strong until the very end.
“Ri..chan... Thank you for everything... Take care... Big sis...”
At this point, An was crying too and shouted for other people to come help them. Y/n placed her bloodied hand on Chishiya’s cheek, wiping his tears away, he held her hand as she caressed him. She was so warm, he never knew she was this warm before. He didn’t wanted her to leave.
Just not yet.
“No.. No, you can’t leave.. Hang on okay y/n..? Help is... help is on the way.”
Y/n shook her head and let all of her tears fall, managing to give Chishiya one final smile.
“Shuntaro... I love you.”
At her words, y/n’s eyes closed and her hand went limp, landing on her body. When the other arrived, all of the executives looked at the scene before them. They were too late. An was crying, still holding on her little sister dead body, telling her to wake up and not to leave her. Chishiya sat there unable to move or say anything.
A pang of guilt hit two executives in particular and they slightly looked at each other and sighed, tears slowly coming in their vision. Aguni was behind them and his fist turned white, knowing y/n was the most important person in the Beach. She was the only one who kept Hatter in the sane side.
Niragi pushed the people aside and dropped his rifle, analyzing the dead girl’s feature. Y/n died with a smile on her face.
“She looks so peaceful.”
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Chishiya woke up at the sound of the bell, indicating to gather in the lobby and group up, since the games were about to start. He felt something wet on his side and he looked at his pillow, it was wet. He touched his face and he shook his head, laying on his bed once again.
He cried. He was crying.
He looked at the ceiling and smiled sadly, clutching on his chest at the amount of pain he felt. The memory of her smiling to him was engraved in his mind and he wasn’t going to let it go.
“I never had the chance to tell you that I loved you too... I’m sorry.. I only now realized it..”
He stood up, wiping the tears off of his face, putting his shoes on and went to the lobby. He put his hood on and tucked his hands in the pockets, he analyzed everyone and he nodded to himself.
‘I will keep my promise.’
873 notes · View notes
gb-patch · 3 years
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Ask Answers: July 10th
I really let asks get away from me lately. I was super focused on working on that Patreon Moment. With that done I can finally think about doing other things, so here’s a new collection of answers!
Thank you for sending in questions everyone ^^.
For the new Patreon moment, will you be able to reference it in step 4? Or just like a tiny nod to it if you pick certain choices?
There won’t be. I’m sorry if you were hoping for that! The Patreon moment is meant to be entirely optional, it’s not something that gets you extra content in the main game.
Is the new CG artist the main one now? :0 I’ve noticed theres been a difference in the art style recently. Is the old CG artist still going to make art for the game? :0
The original artist still makes CGs for the game sometimes, but he mainly focuses on character sprites.
Are you going to put the NSFW our life moment on a website other than patreon? I would love to get it but I can't use patreon atm.
I don’t know. I'm afraid we can't release the Patreon Moment on a normal game storefront because we can't mix 18+ content with our family friendly game. If there's some other place similar to Patreon where it's not the normal type of full-scale public content releases we'd consider using that, but I’m not sure if there is another site that’s better than Patreon in that regard. I'm sorry.
Out of curiosity, in all of your games so far, which characters in each were the most fun to write? They obviously don't have to be your favorite characters!
Buffalo Seer in AFA, really everyone in XOD/XOBD is pretty equally entertaining to write, The Guide in LoV, and Cove in OL!
idk if you accept "personal" questions, but is there anything you've been watching/ listening to lately
Mostly, I’ve been watching/listening to Authortube videos as of late! It’s people who talk generally about the process of how books become traditionally published and/or share their own experience as they attempt to be published. I don’t have an interest in writing normal text based books, but it’s really interesting to hear about that world. I’m listening to a video about royalties right now as I answer these asks.
Will one of the desserts we get to pick be fudge? That'd be such a cute reference! 
Haha, yeah, it should. Unless I completely blank on it and forget when trying to include the various referential food options.
I don't know if this has been asked previously but what would be the approximate heights for the presets MC can choose from Step 2 ~ 4? Are there any measurement you had in mind? Sorry if I didn't make myself clear kk I've been struggling with my English lately 💀 
I don’t know, ahah. I didn’t have any numbers in mind for that. So it’s whatever you imagine it is!
I noticed a bug with the Patreon moment when it comes to what your character wears. When Jamie and Cove are kissing while my character only had dresses selected, I had both the option to remove the dress or to remove the shirt... Picking one of the options to interact with Cove, after he removed his shirt, it had Jamie remove their shirt followed by ther pants despite only having dresses picked. 
Thank you for reporting ^^
I keep refreshing steam to see when the new doc for xobd will be released. I noticed you haven't posted anything about it in quite some time. Would it be possible to ask about a timeline/potential date? (If it's even this year—) I know you and your team are probably working super hard, I'm just super curious! ~Thank you!~ 
There are more stories done, I just haven’t gotten around to publicly releasing them. Hopefully I will have a chance to spend the time on that sooner rather than later!
hello!! i’m not sure if it’s an update but i’ve just replayed our life and at the end i can’t propose to cove anymore? :(( i’ve actually tried playing twice but the options are not there anymore, did you guys remove the options? i’m sorry if you’ve answered this before!! thank you and have a good one :) 
I’m afraid things haven’t been changed or removed, so I think you might’ve accidentally picked the wrong things somewhere along the way and locked yourself out of being able to propose by mistake. Sometimes you meant to say you want to get married but instead you mis-click and have it so the MC isn’t thinking about marriage or something. All I can suggest is starting from the beginning of Step 3 and making sure to follow the steps listed in the FAQ. I’m sorry for that.
Did yall remove some of the options for when youre making out with Cove in the charity moment? I could've sworn you could grab his bonkadonk and its not there anymore 
This is the same situation as the above. We didn’t remove things and you’re not wrong that there are sometimes those options. But there are various choices you have to make to get those options and it sounds like you accidentally missed something. If your relationship isn’t long-term, you can’t do it for example.
HI IM SO EXCITED I CAN FINALLY GET THE STEP 3 DLC 
Thank you for getting it!
Is Shiloh super totally straight bc I’m very gay and a huge Shiloh fan, would my man make an exception?😩
Sadly, he is one of our super straight characters. I’m sorry.
Hi, I have a very dumb question. In Step 2 does Cove not wanna share his drink with us at the mall (or rather why he stops drinking it) because it's an indirect kiss? Or is it like ...weird to him to share? Because if I remember right he eats off our spoon in the birthday scene right? 
Yeah, he’s awkward about it because he likes the MC and it feels very personal to share a straw with his crush.
Hi! If you don't mind me asking, who is the artist for OL2? Their style is so pretty! 
Thank you for saying so! This is her Twitter- https://twitter.com/redridingheart
Do Beginnings & Always and Now & Forever exist in the same universe? 
Yep! XOXO Droplets also exists in the same universe. It’s one big GB Patch world, haha.
Do Pran's parents regret the way they raised him? Do they feel ashamed of it?
No. They’re the type of people best cut out because they’re not gonna change. Which is why Pran does go very limited contact when he’s an adult.
Hi! I just wrapped up my second playthrough of Our Life, and I absolutely adore it, but I had a question. I went to the gallery and found I was missing 2 CGS (specifically Step 1-3 and 2-3) and I had no clue where they would've shown up. Which moments are those found in? 
You get it by telling Cove about his dad offering you money to be his friend in Step 1 and Step 2. You can’t get both in one playthrough, since you can only tell Cove the truth once. I’m really glad you liked it!
Hi hi! Please, how tall is Baxter and Derek? Love the game so much and I can't wait to see more! 
I don’t know, aha. I think Baxter was around 5′10 and Derek was like 5′8/5′9, maybe. I really am not one who has specific heights for things in mind.
is adult cove a bottom, top, or switch? 
A switch, though would choose the top if he had to pick.
I was wondering if there is a way to transfer save data? Even if through the game files. I wanted to be able to transfer my save data from my desktop over to my laptop so that I could continue playing right where I left off from but I'm not entirely sure how to go about that. 
If you save the save folder/persistent data of the game from your desktop and put it into the game folder on your other device, that could work.
Hi! Is it possible for us to know the date when our life: now and forever comes out on steam? Sorry if you've mentioned it before but I haven't seen it and I'm looking foward to that happening and just wanted to know :) 
It’s gonna be a long time, I’m afraid. There’s no estimate right now.
I started playing Our Life with my sister a while ago, and I think you guys should know that we discovered your secret. >:)
L from death note and Cove are clearly the same person, and this whole game is just an origin story!!
I’ve never seen that show so I’m sorry to say I don’t understand the connection/reference you’re trying to make. I’m pretty out of the loop when it comes to media. I don’t watch movies or TV.
Will OL2 have options for disabled MCs?
I understand if it's too complicated, just curious
Unfortunately, it’s not really something we have a plan for. We couldn’t finish the game if we tried to include every disability and have it be meaningful. It’d just be too much content to create. But if we decide to only include a few, how would we choose which disabilities get to be represented and which are left out? I don’t know. It’ll probably have to be something we don’t include as an option again, sadly. I’m sorry.
playing our life > anything else 
Haha, I’m glad you’re enjoying it.
Honestly, I would like to thank Our Life for helping me come to terms with my sexuality. Before, I never would've actually thought that it was possible to like boys romantically and still be asexual. Almost all of the BL visual novels I've read had unskippable sexual content in them and it honestly just didn't click with what I feel. I'm glad I found Our Life. I love the game, the developers, and this fandom so much. Now, I can safely come out as homoromantic AND asexual (at least anonymously here anyway; my parents are still huge homophobes 😂). 
Aw, it’s great to hear you felt comfortable being yourself in the game! That’s wonderful. I’m really sorry about your parents, though.
Will the demo for OL2 be on android? Really not sure if I could wait any longer than I have to aha 
Yeah, it’ll be available for Android once we eventually release a demo!
Do all these reveals perhaps mean development is progressing ahead of schedule? Please let that be the case I'm already obsessed with Qiu 
No, sorry, aha. Art comes along much faster than script/programming-work for us. It’s gonna be a long time before the game is a finished thing you can actually play. But at least we can look at the beautiful images.
Hey! First of all I wanna say I reallllllyyyyy loooovvveeee Our Life and XOXO Droplets! I have over 300 hours of playtime on Our Life… Anyways, I was just wondering, are the Derek and Baxter DLCs going to come out at the same time? If not, which one do you plan to release first? :3 
They will come out separately and Derek will be first! Glad you like the game.
I keep replaying Our Life to get every possible iteration and I am loving it <3 I was wondering if Cove gets locked out of his confession because MC was talking to Lee, would it be possible to confess to him in step 4? 
Yeah, you can avoid the confession in Step 3 and then get it in Step 4.
Hi, my Cove wears bracelets through step 2 and 3 but I still don't get an option to give him a bracelet? I didn't even know that was possible until I seen someone else ask about it lol 
Hm, did you use the Cove creator? Maybe there’s a bug where using the creator to add bracelets doesn’t fulfill the requirement to give Cove a bracelet in Step 3.
Wait, I'm dense, when does Baxter appear in step 2? Is it from big park firework? I feel so bad since i really love Baxter and waiting to buy his dlc. 
It’s in the Soiree Moment. You have to be just friends with Cove, indifferent, or crushing but not ask Cove to the dance at all. Then while there you can find someone new to dance with. But if you bring Cove to the dance while crushing, the MC won’t wanna dance with anyone else so you can’t get the scene.
In step 2 when we go to the soiree I made my mc go alone and baxter chooses the mc to dance, i'm curious, why did he pick the mc? sorry if this has been asked before! 
Because the MC looked to be around his age, seemed to also be searching for a partner, and had nice legs. A perfect option for him.
I read some of the FAQs, and I saw that we could tell Baxter about the condo that he rented there was previously the mean old grandparents. how do we get the mc to tell him that? 
It happens in the DLC Moment “Late Shift”. If you don’t have a job you instead get a longer scene with Baxter.
I don’t know if you’ve addressed this or not, but are you planning on paying voice actors for our life: now and forever? 
Yeah, we pay our VAs in all our projects.
hey can i ask how you did the moments thing in ol? im trying to get into making visual novels and while im VERY sure its out of my comfort zone and all that atm i kinda wanna know just for the future, bc im p sure it would work well for something i wanna do :O but its also fine if you cant say for other reasons :> 
I’m afraid I’m not sure what you mean. Are you asking how we programmed the screen or something script related? Adding Moments like that is pretty straightforward, though. You just have buttons that open to different labels and then the scripts are essentially individual short stories/vignettes. Good luck with your VN!
Since Autumn becomes gender fluid later in the game, will there be a character who remains as he/him to romance in game? 
OL1 has the he/him LIs, OL2 is all about other genders.
I don't want to impose on your creative plans, but a parrot could possibly make a good pet in an OL-type game? They're pretty long-lived and likely to still be thriving by the end even if the MC got them back in step 1. 
I do appreciate the suggestion, but I’m afraid it’s not likely going to happen. I understand there are technically some animals that could theoretically live long enough to last the whole game that or we could have the MC only get a pet after some years have already passed. But the many things that would have to be considered/accommodated for makes it just something we probably can’t manage adding. I’m sorry.
As time passes will we be able to see Qiu and Tamarack's other stage arts as well?
They are both so cute i can't wait to be friends with them!
Yeah, we’ll show content from other Steps in the future. It’ll be a little while from now, though.
Can you date Cove and still have your family comfort you in the car?
You can’t get Cove’s Step 3 confession scene if you have the family comfort you in the car. But that’s not the only way to date him. You can get together with him earlier in the game or later on in Step 4.
Is Mc always going to be the one walking down the aisle or could Cove do it? Also could you choose to have one of your moms walk you? 
No. Cove wouldn’t want to walk down the aisle like that and the MC automatically respects that. And the MC also gets to have their preferences respected, so it’s up to you whether they want to do an aisle walk or not. You also can pick who, if anyone, walks with you.
Once step 4 is out, will you be able to go the whole game on crush/love without either of you confessing? 
Yes, as long as you tell the game you don’t want to progress the relationship. Even in Step 4 it won’t force you to officially get together.
Howdy, so in Step 4, there will be any Romance with Derek that is not part of any dlc? 
He’s only a friend unless you get his romance story.
Will the step 4 in OL2 be one big step or are you considering moments? 
Step 4 is just an epilogue in both games.
hi kind of a weird question but!! we know tht cliff doesn't start dating again but. wht abt flings? like does he ever do 1 night stands or anything? thank u!!!!!!!!!!!! 
Nope. Cliff has a very small interest in sex. If he’s not in a real relationship with a partner he’s crazy about it simply isn’t something he feels a need for, so one night stands wouldn’t even cross his mind.
sorry if you've already answered this, but i was wondering if there were plans for there to be bonus love interests in OL2 like how we have derek and baxter in OL1.
Maybe! There are side characters who could be given romance stories, but whether or not it will happen depends on funding and how long everything else takes to finish.
I don't know if i'm allowed to ask about ol2 here yet, if not u can ignore this or answer it later. My question is can you date one of them and be good friends with the other? I don't want to be strangers with the other bcs i love them both a lot :<
Yes you can!
what patreon level do i have to be to unlock the nsfw moment? im on the $5 one right now, will that give me access to the moment, or just access to the moment progress? 
That’ll give you access! Tier 2 and anything higher allows the player to download it.
158 notes · View notes
itsnothesameasitwas · 3 years
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hiii! this month I’ve read a lot of great fics, so I decided is time to start my monthly fic rec… that means I’ll be doing a short fic rec and recap every month with my favorite fics of the month
note: the fics I’ll be mentioning weren't necessarily posted recently
!!! - please be careful and read all the tags and/or warnings before start reading and left kudos and nice messages to the authors <33
❀ Divinely Blessed by thinlines @thinlinez  | 17k | Explicit | ABO | fic post
“I heard you, Ni. But what do you mean?”
“What do you mean what I mean?”
Harry rolled his eyes as he shoved his alpha friend down onto a seat. “Did you mean you lick someone out or…?”
“Nah, mate! It was me! I got licked out!” Harry could only stare at Niall in horror.
Alpha Harry prides himself on having the bravest and most caring omega who might or might not just fulfill his sudden curiosity.
note: for some reason i don’t know i fell in love with the ABO and found this fic someway and WOW! it’s really fluffy and sweet and while i was reading all i could think about was “god! i really want someone who love me like Harry loves Lou and viceversa” and also has a great smut scene, funny and well writen (cliff ily babe)
❀ Promise me you won’t run away by thinlines | 23k | Explicit | ABO | Español
“Does kissing me stop you from having bad thoughts?” Harry asked, voice muffled into the collar of Louis’ dress shirt. Louis chuckled at this. He trailed a hand down Harry’s back, feeling the muscles tensing along with his touch.
“I guess you can say that. You’re a good distraction.”
“Then I will be the best distraction.” Harry answered, pulling back and watched Louis’ lips unashamedly.
“Come distract me, then.”
Or the Prince/ Knight AU in which Harry left Louis, but the omega never once gave up on them.
note: this fic is beautiful and really REALLY well written, i need to say i cried and im the most cold person in the world but this caught me and I LOVED IT! but also when i finished it i got mad because in the end notes was the spanish translation and i read it in english lmao; anyway i love it!!!... summing this up, the fic made me thought about that LOVE ALWAYS WIN <33
❀ Twist the knife by jishler @jishlerfics | 6k | Explicit | Angst / Smut | fic post
Infuriating, but Louis missed it. Louis missed him. His thighs and his chest and breath and warmth and toothbrush next to Louis’. He missed sex with Harry but he missed his presence more: Louis would settle for watching Harry get himself off if it meant he got to see him; hear the voice that was like a soothing balm over all his wounds.
Two weeks after their breakup, Harry wants his toys back.
note: i definetely don’t read smut in purpose and the reason i’ve read this was because i love the moodboard BUT i need to thank the person who put it on my dash because i liked it so much!! was fun to read and the smut is pretty well written :))
❀  Hold you now by solvetheminourdreams @solvetheminourdreams | 131k | Angst with happy ending | fic post | playlist
The string within Harry's own sweatpants is now dangling outside of his pocket, stretched so far out that the seams of his pants have tightened. His eyes remain hyper focused on Louis, how oblivious he is—scrolling through his phone without a care in the world, while Harry feels his tilt on its axis.
Three years ago, Harry Styles said goodbye to communications consultancy firm McQuiston Worldwide, leaving a life of travel and agency PR behind. When he accompanies his best friend to a family wedding across the Atlantic, he'll be forced to reopen old wounds and face his past—one that no one wants to hash out, but may just have to.
note: at the end of the first chapter i was emotional, is the kind of fic that you feel every single emotion, the one you literally feel are part of it... it’s perfectly well written and please give it a chance and  check all the stef’s works because she’s a super talented writer... if i say something else i’ll probably do spoilers so, shut up ana.
❀ The money mark by brightgolden @brightgolden | 52k | Explicit | ABO | fic post
Harry's heart beats faster in his chest as the name sinks in. The Tomlinson name is awfully familiar, and he isn’t sure how many rich Tomlinsons are out here in London, but he knew one. Seven years ago.
Like all fine things in the world, Louis Tomlinson ages exceptionally well.
OR
Where Louis is Harry’s first sugar daddy who dumped him over text and their paths cross, seven years later.
note: THIS IS MY FAVORITE FIC OF THE YEAR. sorry, but this fic is super well written, is omega harry + alpha louis and find smth like this is almost impossible! but i loved the fact that harry could be an omega and a sugar baby but he’s independant and strong and wow! it’s amazing; everyone should read it because it’s really good!! (ps. louis is the alpha of my dreams, he’s a complete gentlemen)
❀ Sweet like candy by neodiamond @neondiamond | 4k | General Audiences | ABO | fic post
Louis is an Alpha with an odd obsession for gummy bears. Harry is an Omega who makes friends a little too easily. They meet on the bus.
note: this is the cutest fluffy fic I have ever read! strangers to friends to lovers <333
❀ Literally making love by Brooklyn_babylon @twopoppies | 30k | Explicit | Robot/Human Relationship | fic post
Holding up one of the android's eyes to the workshop’s windows, he smiled as the light picked up the gold flecks in the pale green of his irises. Louis had always paid attention to even the tiniest details.
--
All Louis intended to do was rescue someone in need from loneliness. He had no idea it would be himself.
note: science + me = signal error BUT this fic. OMG. how to say this is one of the fics would be in my recap at the end of the year; i have read another fic by Gina and was really good but this is probably my favorite between both of them... all i know and want now is to create my perfect partner lmao. 
❀ I’m gonna keep this love, if you let me by pixies @tomlinbuns | 26k | Explicit | ABO | fic post
Louis makes Harry pretend to be his boyfriend one night out. The rest is history.
note: this one is simple to discribe... the best of the best. one of my favorites abo fics, funny, teasing and very romantic. i enjoyed so much read how these two guys fell in love with each other. god bless this fic <33
❀ Beautiful stranger by lovelarry10 @chloehl10 | 66k | Explicit | ABO / Mpreg | fic post
“Did you want to- oh. Uh, sorry, I-” Harry stuttered, licking his lips as he looked over Louis’ bare torso, not focusing on the ocean ahead of him. “You’re very distracting, Lou.”
“Trying to tell me you haven’t seen a topless Omega before?” Louis asked, walking back to his rucksack and grabbing a bottle of suncream out of it before returning to stand by Harry.
“Not one as stunning as you,” he thought he heard Harry mutter as he started to rub the cream into his shoulders.
*****
When Alpha Harry Styles attends the Gucci Cruise 2020 show, he knows what to expect: clothes, clutch bags, and a few too many pretentious people. What he doesn’t expect, however, is to run into an Omega who is more beautiful than anything on the runway.
note: this fic is from 2019 but who cares, i loved it so much and i want to thank/blame @justalarryblog​ because she unintentionally recommended it to me in her abo fic rec post and now i want someone like this harry in my life... is it too much to ask? because is one of the most beautiful abo fics i’ve read this month and wow. if you haven’t read it yet, what are you waiting for??
❀ Waiting on you by beckywritesthings @beckydoesthings  | 21k | Mature | Mpreg | fic post
“Do you want to touch?” Harry asks, taking one of his hands off to tangle with Louis’. His open invitation finally drags Louis’ attention away from his baby and up to his face, blue eyes wobbly with emotions. It’s clear that he’s too taken to really form words, so Harry takes the initiative to press their laced hands against his shirt fabric, warmth from the skin radiating through.
Louis pushes his shirt up to his chest, taking Harry’s hand and pressing it to hold the fabric in place. His hands return to warm skin, palms even more scalding now that there’s nothing in between them. And then, as if that wasn’t enough for Harry’s heart to handle, Louis leans in, pressing his lips right above his belly button.
“Hi, baby,” he says, lips moving across his skin softly. “I’m your… I’m Louis.”
Or Harry is pregnant with a stranger’s baby and Louis doesn’t know. It’s a minor detail that Harry’s both living with Louis and in love with him. No big deal.
note: this fic is really new, someone reblogged the fic post and when i saw it first i was like ‘huh?’ and then suddendly (in less than a minute) decided it was the next thing i’ll be reading and now i’m completely in love with it. Lou i need to say you’re the kind of guy everyone wants in their life <3 
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❀ all the love, ana. xx
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batarangsoundsdumb · 3 years
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hae interrogationes multae respondeant quia demens .
if you read this entire ask post you deserve a gold star and financial recompensation
Um, Obviously because when you’re adopted by a white guy you automatically become white duhhh
this is about this post lmao and yeah youre absolutely right, you have to hand your poc card in when you get adopted by a white guy.
Do you think Cass would listen to Yanni, the YouTube channel epic symphonic rock, or some other stuff? There's some cool mashups but idk if that's up your alley, I kinda feel like I'm pushing it with my weird taste of music by recommending an orchestra cover of metal, but i just love that sort of thing and mashups :P @harvestyourcherries 
i haven’t heard of that? but in my personal (correct) opinion steph listens to classical music, and then both modern and older, and then also stuff like black sabbath, iron maiden, but also hardrock and hardcore. i like the idea of cass just liking the most extreme screaming songs full of noise and then also listen to pachelbel’s 370th sonata yanno? THANK YOU for the rec tho
speaking of ur cass playlist hc...reminds of the time (yesterday) i found 2 playlists randomly on spotify from the same user. one was abt 3 hours of instrumental/classical "dark" & "nostalgic" music. the other almost 11 hours of nothing but hardcore bass/synth/electronic music. just an incredible tightrope act to put on in public. the synth one was also called like "psalms for synth sluts" which is Also incredible
tbh i LOVE synth SO MUCH like for no reason at all but then also cannot handle a poppy electronic beat lmao. but this seems like the kinda thing i’d do but just in one (1) playlist bc i just sort songs by vibe instead of genre? that’s how i end up with britney spears and billy ray cyrus in the same playlist. 
Oh, I want Kate Kane playlist next! It would be amazing if you could do one when you have time and will 🙏
how rude would it be of me to just say no? like sorry kate but idk you and also you seem way too keen on the us military for an institution that homophobically targeted you? (and also commits war crimes) but let’s unpack the fact that the institution that caused the death of your mom and sister and also got you blacklisted for being gay is still one you align with???
'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' 'yes i am' 'no you're not' --- when i tell you i fucking screamed LOL!!!!!!! i can imagine the cameraman not knowing if he should cut to commercial or keep it on these two weirdos fighting on stage (bruce definitely ruffled dick's hair/noogied him right?? 
about this post but yeah lmao. this cameraman just turns to like the audience to get a reaction and it’s just multiple moments of CLEAR shock.
you are the only funny person on this hellsite
how egotistical is it for me to say that i get this ask multiple times a month? bc it literally happens so often it’s hilarious to me.
Wish there was more john/Bruce content 😔😔😔 was so hungry I actually looked at canon media 😔😔😔 (Justice League Dark babeeeyyyyyy)
check out batman: damned for some mediocre content but at least it’s john/bruce (also very interesting story and stuff, just got very >:( over this weird part where harley quinn tried to r*pe bruce or something? it’s not for everyone)
dick grayson but he's nicki minaj
his anaconda don’t want none,,, unless...... 
Dick Grayson was never a cop, he played Marshall on Paw Patrol
you are SO right. also paw patrol is a fucking good show idc. that shit could’ve been the new steven universe on this hellsite.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CS1lI0bLI7-/?utm_medium=copy_link
...
why do people keep reposting my CONTENT. if you are not funny yourself don’t just grab shit off of tumblr and post it on insta,,, get a life. sidenote: should i start an insta and get all these ppl to take my content down that would be funny as hell.
Might I suggest for a Gotham City Meme: something about the true crime fandom thirsting for the rogues gallery
ok can i just say something slightly controversial?? no? i don’t find true crime ppl who are into criminals funny, that shits disturbing irl im not gonna bring that into my very chill universe.
i may have never seen a 'jason cleaning guns in sink' fic but i do know he WOULD
THANK YOU
bestie im sorry to say this to you but while you can, and people do wash their guns in the sink, that is a lot of lead in a very vital part of the kitchen.
people tend to do it in the bathtub.
WHY???? like damn why do you even have guns
i dont think i read many gun sink fics exactly but i have read lots of fics where jason cleanes his guns in the living room. usualy dissembles them and cleans them with a rag i think
lmao fair enough, like i think that’s a large part of what i remember as well.
if you say you've seen/read gun sink fics I believe you. I think those of us who didn't see them are lucky or maybe didn't search for fics by tags or something idk
i mean ive never sought them out but i HAVE seen them,, like definitely i know almost for certain.
saw your tags and I'm interested in Steph/Kara now. They would be the most chaotic couple <3
literally thoooo, i have a wip where they get together in a zombie apocalypse and like UGGGHhhh i am so in love with them.
I am the Breece anon. Thanks for the recommendation; am reading now. I’ve always been a hardcore Superman fan because I love my pure himbo farm boy. My logic is, if one Bruce is a Broose, then multiple Broose are a herd of Breece. And this is a hill upon which I will perish.
fair enough,,,, like moose, meese, goose, geese, bruce, breece. i get your logic and i stand by it as well. (glad you enjoyed the comic recs!!!!)
It's a beautiful day in Gotham, and you are a group of horrible Breece
OH my god dude lmao
there only being 42 fics on ao3 for tim and bernard is honestly so sad i need more
it’s like twice that now!!! we did it lads. (tho very sad that my fic isnt number one but like number 4 :((((  )
i'm too late you already did the poll lol but may i suggest bethy (bernard + timothy)
shit dude that wouldve been so fucking funnyyyyy. think ppl have just stuck to timber tho, tim/bernard kinda died down recently and i think it’s too bad, they’re a great couple and i love them.
Wait, hear me out
Bernothy @redlightofdawn
great recommendation (lmao this ask is from like a month ago) but very sorry to announce that NARDTH is the superior shipname
Wait, we know that bernard likes milfs (Tim's step-mom) but what about dilfs? gilfs?
Wait no, I regret sending that ask
these were two seperate asks and they’re HILARIOUS. in my personal opinion tho,,, milfs, gilfs, dilfs are just about vibes and bernard is just attracted to sexy ppl who may sometimes be milfs, dilfs, or EVEN gilfs.
crime in bludhaven would drop to half if nightwing had a boob window. in this essay i will-
WHERE’S THE ESSAY ANON, WHERE’S THE FUCKING ESSAY
Wait if Barbra and Tim r at opposite ends at all times what happened to Barbra once everyone’s Tim’s ever love before started dying lol
she won a lottery ticket and spent 2 weeks on a resort in the bahamas before returning home and finding out that the joker was arrested for tax evasion and then spent a month staying at her big tiddie goth girlfriend’s house before conner came back to life and she broke her pinkie playing table hockey.
Why is the opposite end thing so funny and compelling to me. Tim comes back from his depression quest for Bruce and Babs is now a literal god
lmao when tim loses his spleen barbara reaches nirvana.
Are you still taking music recs because I have three songs that remind me of Jason that I think you'd like
send to me or lose a toe
🌸 ⭐ put this star into the inbox of your favorite blogs. it’s time to spread positivity! ⭐🌸😋
thanks, i wont tho on account of i wont.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMduBy3Sr/
⬆️
This is the whole of Blüdhaven and everyone anywhere.
Nightwings ass alone saves more people in a calendar year and does more for so society than most heroes do their whole career.Also u are one of the funniest tumblr pages out there. The vibes are unmatched and the memes and tags ✨send me✨.Thank u and goodnight @julia-flow 
fanksss also lmao.
That's going to be a little bit difficult to explain, but
There's some music that you listen to and you think, "oh my gosh, I can perfectly imagine Dick Grayson singing this song, with the same voice as the singer because that voice matches with Dick Grayson"?
oh yeah totally lmao. i have a lot of songs that i think are just entirely dick grayson yanno? kind of all of my playlists have that vibe, but i really find bleachers to fit with dick? idk.
"Lois lane/Superman" fics this, "Lois lane/Clark Kent" fics that, (/lh) let's get into the real good stuff. Some people ship Lois, Clark, and Superman as a throuple. Most popular fic tag for sure
yes totally, i think they’d be absolutely killer on ao3 and clark gets so fucking embarassed about it.
I miss your post, hope you’re doing okay!!
haha this was like 2 months ago, but i was doing fine then too! just didn’t have a lot of inspiration in terms of content.
Doot doot!
noot noot
I’m confused. What did DC do now? Like with nightwing? And another sibling? Please spoil everything for me
lmao they gave him a secret sister plotline where they had his dad cheat on his mom with tony zucco’s wife, bc dick’s life wasn’t traumatic enough yet.
sorry but it's so funny that batman is called "the dark knight" when the gotham city baseball team is called the gotham knights. it'd be like if a vigilante was running around new york called like "the scary yankee"
lmaooo no. but like yankee comes from dutch names or something so wouldnt it be HILARIOUS if gotham knights came from like german names and bruce would be running around called the dark KLAUS UND NIEK @graysonnightwing 
(not a batcest shipper) it’s so funny to me that the responses are “i’m a batcest shipper because i can differentiate fiction from reality and and it doesn’t bother me personally, but i understand why you oils think it’s weird” to “i wish all batcest shippers a very fucking die”
yeah lmaoo. i personally basically flipped my entire stance around to ‘i dont care please leave me and everybody else alone’ bc i think there’s really no point in starting a moral dillema over some fucking fandom bullshit. Please just,,, go home,,, log off, find a nice forest to have a little walk in and remember that somewhere in history, somebody probably died in the place you’re standing. and you will also die someday, and somebody will have to look at your internet usage and see you fighting multiple people anonymously while being named ‘nightwingsbuttchin200186′ like... calm down, we’re all gonna die this is not the thing to worry about.
so since like "wards" don't really exist in modern society almost all the batkids are foster kids, right? i used to work in the system and imagine: monthly visits from social workers and guardian ad litems, bruce having to get permission to take the boys anywhere out of state, calling their social worker at like 8 a.m. like "yeah dick broke his arm again... a gymnastics accident this time...." their poor social worker. bruce send her a huge bouquet and box of chocolates every month to stay on her good side
i imagine the social worker just getting into the case like ‘yeah let’s get this kid a good guardian’ and then ending up having to work with 22 y/o bruce wayne and his 50 y/o dad. and so this social worker is like ‘okay we can work with this, this is the best home i can find’ and then like it ends up landing on its feet and then the kid gets adopted and then they get a call a year later like ‘uhm so hi, this kid tried to steal my tyres can i adopt him?’ and like 3 years later. ‘okay so basically, my neighbours’ kid imprinted on me and now they’re dead, can i keep him?’ two years later it’s like ‘okay so this assassin child-’
ever since I saw that one post of yours, the meme that's something like "I know that abba's backup dancer got me" with a picture of discowing, I've been haunted. Every once in a while I'll be minding my own business then the image of abba's backup dancer dick grayson aka nightwing aka discowing will flash in my mind and I'll be frozen in place. Today at work I was in the middle of folding clothes and suddenly once again discowing entered my mind and I suddenly lost the ability to see anything except He. Thank you.
wow. the IMPACT.
Braver than any US marine man props to you🤝
this shit is about the time i wrote an article on batcest, like man,,, the fact that i didn’t get cancelled is MIRACULOUS. also like,,, uh if anybody on here did gossip on me,, send screenshots i’d love to see it.
Hello, just wanted to say your article was great. Thank you for taking the time to provide an unbaised answer. It should provide people with nuances they couldn't possibly conjure on their own.
May I ask where your username originates from?
yes you may (also thanks!!!) i thought it up when i was trying to find an original username bc i didnt want to be called like ‘timdrakes something something’ or ‘jason todd something smoething’ or ‘dick grayson something something’ yanno? so i thought batarangs, they sound so dumb and that’s my username story... now it’s my whole entire brand lmao.
yno that bit in kick ass where red mist asks kick ass if he wants a hit of his blunt, was that the inspo for stoner tim
no? it’s bc i think stoners are hilarious and drugs are great. (dont do drugs tho) 
How would u feel if someone actually wore one of those bruce or ollie pride shirts u edited
fenomenal next question.
Dick as lil huddy and Jason as James gave me radiation poisoning and now I’m screaming crying throwing up so thx for that
(Rico suave as Tim is perfect tho literally no changes needed)
i was so funny for that shit wasn’t i??? lmao i loved those weird ass fancasts
You're doing the Lord's work by providing us with all these Gotham/Metropolis citizens memes, thank you for being so relentlessly funny @nellethiel-aranel
you’re welcome!! i really enjoy making memes, but getting validation for my content and my memes is REALLY nice.
Bruce is such a slut in your memes and honestly i love that for him @rhodey-rhudert-rhodes-main 
he’s that much of a slut irl too dw.
Bruce and Alfred have an emergency pride flag for the batkids. Oliver Queen printed an emergency "I love my gay son" t-shirt and as soon as Roy told him he was dating Jason, Oliver started wearing that shirt everyday and Roy always cringes when he sees it. Oliver also has an emergency "I love my lesbian daughter" shirt just in case for Cissie.
lmao YES i had a post like this bc like all of their kids/family members are so gayy
stop bringing back batfam fancasts it is not real it is not real it is not- 😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀😀
oh yes it is my darling.
did discowing burn down the notredam because he hates the bees? @allulily
no he did it bc fuck the french.
im gonna beg for 1 thing and 1 thing only. please please please put physical by olivia newton john on dick's playlist
okay then beg. bc i wont. physical reminds me too much of glee and that hurts me mentally.
your playlist is sorely missing some Madonna. Specifically Into the Groove, Like a Prayer, and Vogue
i’m scared of madonna that’s why she’s not on there. she haunts me in my dreams.
suggestion: son of batman by aaron dews for dick’s playlist🤩
sorry, i listened to it and the vibe didn’t agree with me.
Hear me out, metropolis citizens sending rare pair fics of Clark Kent x Superman fics to Lois to edit
yes, absolutely hilarious. even more funny if they send like physical copies, no address attached and lois sends it back marked with red ink, SOMEHOW
Imagine all the smut Clark must of read editing the fics
clark reads smut confirmeeed
NOT LOIS READING SUPERBAT PORN AND EDITING IT A 2AM 
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
hc that alfred is a meta that boosts healing factor of the people around him. if the bats are injured as much as they seem to be they would be doing bat stuff MAYBE half the year. no one including alfred knows about this. whenever the kids move out they inexplicably dont recover from injuries as fast and feel better whenever they visit the manor they just chalk it up to homesickness. bruce just thinks he heals really fast. alfred thinks everyone doesnt take care of themselves properly @finchcollector
that’s actually such a great idea, but i think that alfred would find out and learn how to concentrate it better so he can help more people, bc he’s great and i love him.
One of your dickfast posts reminded me of that tweet that goes: 'so you've had sex how many times? Yeah technically that's not a bromance' lol that's dickwally or dickroy
literally tho. like that’s all of dick’s friendships. once it gets past a certain time dick is like ‘wow i wonder what it would be like to make out with wally, wally come make out with me’ and wally’s like ‘we’ve done this like 40 times, dick, you know what it’s like’ and dick is like ‘sorry are you complaining?’ and they just make out.
superfam and batfam associations??
-batman and superman
-dick/barabara and supergirl?
-conner and tim
-jon and damian
pls enlighten me I am confused
nope,,, uhm batman and superman, but dick and superman as well, and then conner and tim, jon and damian and steph + babs with supergirl
I came across a fic in which Wonder Woman calls Batman "Stella" (like Stellaluna, the children's book) and I can imagine the batkids hop on the trend and maybe copies of the book appear at random places (aka, everywhere Bruce frequents)
sorry can’t reciprocate that was the name of my high school chemistry teacher and it gives me nightmares to think about.
good human what are your pronouns?
wouldn’t you like to know?
I need me some gothamites preferring harley over joker memes
everyone prefers harley over joker youre just very fucked up if you dont
don't understand why people try to add like veteran policy to the batfamily
dick pulling out his veteran batfam member card so he can eat first: step aside, peasants
Do you know the song Simmer by Haley Williams? It (the first verse anyways) reminds me of Jason? It's about rage.
damn yeah i LOVE HAYLEY!!!! youre right thoo
Okay so I like listen to your stoner Tim Drake playlist 24/7 but would he listen to skegss? Also I keep adding songs mentally it’s killing me 😩✋🏼 Anyways,, I literally love and worship your playlist 😃🤞🏼 And uh yeah have a good day ✨
stoner tim drake playlist is lyfeeee. also dont know who skeggs is? i’m stupid? have a good day!!
All the Robins (and Batgirl) decide to trade costumes for one night just to fuck with Batman and all the villains in Gotham. @subspacecadet 
batman knows it’s them youknow but like,,, what does he call them? he’s like ‘red hood?’ and 3 people answer and he’s not about to compromise some identities so he’s just Pissed.
I aspire to treat cops the way my dad treats them. This man is a 45 year old Asian immigrant to the US and the treats them like his pets. He talks about them like unruly children. Sometimes he pays off local cops to shut up and stop acting racist. And usually it works. I don’t know why but I can see Oliver Queen doing this
vibes... and also yes? oliver queen handing a local cop a donut to shut the fuck up lmao. but yanno i commit enough crimes to not really want to ever see a cop ever, so they kinda scare the everloving fuck out of me.
seeing as tim hasn't aged in years, that means he was 17 at peak emo tumblr era. im back on my emo tim bullshit and im not letting it go
emo tim had a wattpad account send tweet
People seem to think that batman is so dark and serious when the rainbow batsuit is right there. He wore it with no shame.
dude the 60s were a DIFFERENT TIME
dick grew up in a circus, jason grew up on the streets, and tim was probably raised by the internet
all of them cuss every other word and you cannot tell me otherwise
bitch i KNOW but dc has to change to an 18+ rating if they want to sell comix with swear words in them so we gotta deal with imagining the swear words in ourselves
thoughts on teen titans and young justice
haven’t seen teen titans on account of havent seen it and young justice was LITERALLY my favourite thing ever, tho i do gotta admit it’s not at all similar to the young justice comics unfortunately. i really wouldve liked to see timmy bart kon cassie and cissie animated on tv!!
ew ew ew how to delete batcest shippers I genuinely digust them
log off tumblr?
Okay as poc who was called racist for calling an Italian pastabrain: in the batfam are Italians bit Damian just yells various insults about the others being Italian. Just him yelling “What are you doing you moronic spaghettihead!” At steph etc
huh? i meant real italians. homeboy is telling steph he hopes she chokes on her fucking garlic.
I think it's dumb as hell to pull the batman is the best fighter in the batfam argument because like it's just irresponsible of Bruce to let his kids fight when they couldn't possibly be on his league or something
fair enough, but also like who cares they could all kill you just sit down and take a beating.
lady shiva, thalia al ghul and Selina Kyle are all milfs @notanothertimburtonenthusiastugh 
unfortunately, i have to admit,,, you’re right
why tf didn't someone give joker a death sentence already? like he's a mass murderer...give him the electric chair treatment wtf
idk i think plenty of people would have tried to murder him already (boring answer is: he is a popular character so they can’t kill him off bc he brings in lots of money)
There’s no such thing as “ copaganda”.
all american media is propaganda. happy to clear this up for you
is it bad that I find lady shiva owa owa
no. find her as owa owa as you want.
aight I'm guessing the order of your favs in batfam:
1. tim
2. Steph
3. dick
4. Duke
5. the rest
you’re wrong but it’s cute that you tried, i generally don’t have favourites, but i have a special place in my heart for steph, tim, dick and cass. bc they were like my introduction to batfam. but damian, jason, duke, bruce, babs and alfred are NOT FORGOTTEN OR UNLOVED
oh my god i was literally just readily willing to believe that italians werent white ty for clarifying it was a joke im so dumb sdkvjskdfs
i mean some italians aren’t white? italian is a nationality as well as an ethnicity, so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
since I saw so many people doing headcanons about the nationalities of batboys, I see Dick as an Italian.
dont know if youre serious or not, but sure.
super random but
jason 🤝 damian
old english
lmao fair enough.
tim absolutely has 1 gay uncle and his parents shit talk said uncle all the time so after bruce adopts him he specifically reaches out to this uncle to be like "heyyyy just so you know you majorly influenced my life yes i know i havent seen you since i was 5 and at the family reunion yes i know you dont remember my name idc thank you im gay too" and then they never talk again.
yuppp lmao that’s definitely something that could happen. i can also consider tim having no family members, like none. until he does like a dna test and he realises he has like an aunt living barely 2 miles away from him who’s like some illegitimate child of his grandpa.
I dare you one of them sends clark superman/clark fic and clark corrects the shit out of it and then goes like ps his dick is not that big, just telling as someone who has seen it. internet either explodes or goes who tf did he not fuck at this point.
i think everybody would call clark a buzzkill and try to cancel him over that.
so you're telling me Tim Drake wouldn't buy Starbucks?
no. dunkin donuts all the way
One of my favorite things is imagining people finding out jason came back from the dead and being like "oh no does he have magic powers now?!?!?" and he just pulls out a gun and tries to shoot joker
now he doesn’t even have the gun :) lmao
my favorite batfamily fanfictions are the ones where they use their shitty codenames, unironically, in any context
bruce gets codename ‘ugh’ everytime. he hates it.
crazy that tim being a 17 y/o ceo and a stoner who does brand deals are all actual canon things written in detective comics comics and not made up for shits and giggles by you, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb @rowdeyclown
SO CRAZY HUH?
batman au where everything is the same but his utility belt is bright pink
absolutely, but i raise you, his boots light up like sketchers when he kicks people.
unbeknownst to the superhero fandom writers in the dcuniverse, clark and BRUCE are one of the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag on ao3. clark writes the best lois x superman angst, full of unhappy endings and scenes that are a so detailed you'd think you were in the middle of a superhero beatdown. bruce made an ao3 account to fuel "the do the butts match" thing, and makes batman/bruce fics from time to time. he wrote a superbat fic as a joke but ended up making it REAL porny. @concrastinator
dude they’re WAY too busy for that. Oliver Queen and Hal Jordan on the other hand are the most prolific fanfic writers in the superhero rpf tag writing what is Mostly porn.
When the dining table topic gets to politics, Steph says "eat the rich" as the solution
bruce just silently takes away her fork and knife while she’s talking.
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The Warehouse
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Can I request like maybe a Halloweeny smut (??) with Wonwoo in like an abandoned factory (like the gose ep with the ghosts) or escape room but reader is not a fan of scary stories and terrified of clowns but she accepts the adventure anyways because detective!mode Wonwoo is such a turn onnnn thank you so much and please if you decide to write something like this don't feel pressured to post around Halloween 🎃 I always enjoy reading your stories! Thank you for your time and hard work! 😽
AN: Sorry this took me so long to write! I tried to get it done by Halloween and failed to do so :/ but I hope you still find it enjoyable! 
Warnings for: Sex, sex in a public abandoned warehouse, mentions of clowns and dolls, being a slightly terror fic, also no condoms, and creampies.
-
“So... We have to stay here all night?”
“If we want to prove that this place isn’t haunted, that’s what we have to do.”
“And... We’re sure it’s not haunted... Right?”
Wonwoo didn’t respond to you as he thumbed through the contents of his bag, seeming to go back through his mental list of things you two would need for the night. You watched him for a few moments in silence, but eventually your anxiety was making you just a tad too distracted. You sighed and looked down to your feet, kicking up the dirt beneath them.
Finally Wonwoo let out a content sound and resecured his bag over his shoulder.
“A place can’t be haunted if ghosts aren’t real,” Wonwoo said assuredly. He looked over at you and hummed thoughtfully. “You don’t look so sure however. Don’t tell me you’re scared.”
When Kwon Soonyoung had come to Wonwoo about an abandoned factory he wanted to repurpose, Wonwoo said yes to the job of proving it wasn’t haunted before Soonyoung had even finished what he was saying.
You weren’t sure why Wonwoo was always eager for the overnight jobs- always trying to stay up late in strange places that people swore up and down held cold spots and scary creatures. It certainly wasn’t those projects of his that you looked forward to. Personally, you were a very easily frightened person.
Just someone closing a book too loud in the library could make you shriek in surprise. So, normally, when it came to Wonwoo’s spookier adventures you tended to busy yourself playing video games safely indoors with Kim Mingyu.
But recently with Halloween being just around the corner, Wonwoo was busy with debunking so many places that he didn’t really have the time for you. It wasn’t anything he had said or done but... You knew that if you wanted to actually spend some time with Wonwoo you would have to suck it up and go on this one trip with him.
So you packed up for a overnight trip and begged him to let you come watch him work. It took a little bit of persuading, but he decided that he would let it slide if you assured him you would be okay.
“So... I just know that I’m going to regret asking this but... What exactly is supposed to be the problem with this place anyways?” You asked Wonwoo. He glanced back at you, his eyebrows high in surprise at the question.
“Oh you don’t know?”
He turned his attention back to the camera and hummed.
“Story has it that this used to be a factory for this really popular toy in the late 80s called Q-Tee. They had the whole management set up here. Like they oversaw the process of everything, including marketing. The toys weren’t doing great here... On account of them scaring children at night, so they decided to give the brand a mascot to help them sell better.”
“The mascot was supposed to be kind of like a Santa Claus, but the kids were scared of him too, and turned out the guy had a few screws loose. He ended up kidnapping a bunch of children- and almost killed them all. But before he could cops busted in. He didn’t want to go to jail so he got a gun and shot himself and now supposedly he haunts the place, still trying to get people to buy the toy.”
Wonwoo shrugged.
“Honestly, it’s not creative, but I guess it’s enough to freak out people who want to buy the place.”
You shifted uncomfortably but tried your best not to worry too much. Out of all the things that you were scared of ghosts certainly weren’t the worst thing that could be haunting this place.
“What was the toy anyways?” You asked him lightly, trying to make yourself sound brave.”
He once again shrugged.
“Clowns would you believe it.” Your heart stopped. If there was one thing that you absolutely could not handle it was a ghost clown. A clown doll- scary but can be destroyed. A clown itself- simply avoidable despite those terrifying painted eyes. But a clown ghost? Unavoidable. Avenging and- probably your number one biggest nightmare.
You grabbed on to Wonwoo’s wrist, holding him a little tighter as he switched on the camera.
“But don’t you worry,” Wonwoo continued, clearly not noticing your sudden change in attitude. “We’re here to prove that the ghosts here aren’t real. And no one has been to this factory in years. So, this job will be a piece of cake.”
Hours passed and nothing.
The room got darker, the clock kept ticking, Wonwoo turned another page in his book.
You sighed. You couldn’t believe that on top of being in a place right out of your nightmares you were bored. And desperate for something to do.
You got to your feet and began to look around on some of the shelves in the room that you were in. You could see something small in the back corner of one of them, so you reached forward for it curiously. You wrapped your fingers softly around it, and turned it around.
The item itself was soft in your hand, and had on a purple and silver diamond outfit. It was covered slightly in dust, but that wasn’t what bothered you. The pattern gave you a bad pinch of nostalgia, that made you hesitantly drag your eyes up to the face of the doll.
You screamed and threw the doll back towards the shelf when you saw the painted face of a clown.
It was hideous, with large white diamonds making its eyes look even bigger, a bright red nose, and dark skin that made the chipping white paint even more off putting. You raced back over to Wonwoo, burying your face into his chest
“I saw one,” you screeched.
Wonwoo laughed and peeled you off of him.
“It was just a doll,” he said lightly, patting your head in- frankly- an awful attempt to calm you down. “Don’t tell me you were scared of a doll?”
“It was not a doll it was a clown doll,” you stated back pointedly. “And I’m not scared of dolls... Well not that doll, I’m just... Scared of clowns.”
Wonwoo laughed softly at you, his fingers taking you by your shoulders carefully.
“There aren’t any clowns here,” he assured you softly. “And there haven’t been for many many years.”
The look in his eyes made you want to believe that what he was saying was true. You felt yourself ease down a little, your fingers lightly brushing against his.
“You promise?” You asked. He nodded.
“I promise.” He assured. “In fact... I’m so confident that you will be fine, that why don’t we do a little something to pass the time hm?”
At first you completely missed the implication in Wonwoo’s voice. Assuming that he was talking about maybe reading a book together or playing a round of Among Us on his phone. But instead of that you suddenly felt a cool hand slip under your shirt. You wiggled under the touch.
“You want to do that...” You looked around the warehouse nervously. “Here?”
Wonwoo hummed, his other hand chilling the skin beneath it as he rested it against your stomach.
“Why not? There’s no one around?” Wonwoo’s voice was comforting despite the location and honestly, where your heart should be racing due to environment, your heart was racing because Wonwoo’s hands on you were completely intoxicating.
You let out a long whine.
“We still shouldn’t do it,” you whispered quietly. Wonwoo gave you a smile.
“Oh, and is that a no?” He asked softly as he lifted you up, placing you gingerly on the table. You wrapped your legs around his torso and rolled your hips against him.
“I guess I’m not really one to say no to sex with you,” you said with a grin.
Wonwoo smiled back at that, his fingers digging into your hips.
“Hm, then I guess here is the perfect place to do it.” Wonwoo dipped his head down at that, his lips brushing against the nape of your neck. You whined softly and tilted your chin upwards so that he had better access to you as he began to kiss at the warm skin there, his teeth nipping at you every once in a while.
With each little touch a shock ran through your body, sending heat right down to your core.
You whined and wrapped your arms tightly around Wonwoo’s body. Your eyes started to drift down his body, trailing over first his broad shoulders, down his chest. As you were looking at him Wonwoo smiled and took the bottom edge of his shirt, pulling it over his shirt and tossing it over onto the floor. You groaned at that, throwing your head back.
“Wonwoo we just washed that shirt,” you whined. Wonwoo just grinned at you as he discarded the rest of his clothes.
“We can wash it again.”
He leaned forward and began to kiss your neck again, effectively shutting you up. You whined and squirmed under him, but he soon grew tired of your movement and placed his hands on your hips as he kissed you to still you. You were pretty happy with just letting Wonwoo explore your body with his lips, each kiss sending a small shiver through your body- but after a while you got eager for more...
You wriggled a little under his grip again until he loosened his hands and then you brought your hand down blindly until your fingers had wrapped around his thick member. You smiled and began to slowly struck it, feeling pleasantly surprised by how turned on Wonwoo clearly was by the little moans leaving his lips with every twist of your wrist.
“Hmm, how does that feel?” You teased lightly. Wonwoo didn’t respond, instead he grunted and in one swift motion, pulled your button-up open, and threw your pants and underwear to the side.
You whined as cold air hit your body, and you wrapped your legs around Wonwoo’s waist to try and warm up. Wonwoo chuckled.
“How does that feel?” He parroted back to you. You tried to send him a glare for the reaction but before it could really hit it’s mark, you felt a finger slide into you.
Wonwoo’s fingers were cold and big and yo felt your whole body jolt a little bit when yo felt his digit slide knuckle deep into you and then curl at the end.
“I can’t believe I’m going to let you-” The finger slid out of your body before you could finish speaking about it made you whine lowly, your thighs quivering. Wonwoo didn’t think twice before slowly beginning to ease his finger in and out of you, watching in amazement as your pussy took his digit.
He made quick work, working one- two- three fingers into your pussy, until his fingers were a dripping mess and you were literally begging for his cock.
“Fine, fine, but next time be a little more patient.”
Wonwoo slid his cock deep inside of you, and at first he just sat there- HIs cock throbbing inside your dripping pussy while his chest heaved up and down with breath after breath.
And then, finally he began to slowly slide out. You groaned in pleasure, your fingers curling into his back at the friction the action caused- Only to yelp when Wonwoo suddenly pushed himself hard back into you.
He sat there again for a few moments, just listening to your whine’s and half-hearted pleas for him to continue, before slowly sliding out again and pushing himself back in.
If nothing else, Wonwoo was a bit of a sadist in that way when he fucked you. He liked to find his own pace and fuck you at it no matter how you felt about the pace. If he found pleasure in the sounds you made while he was fucking you- that was all that mattered.
And he always found pleasure in the sounds you made when he was fucking you.
Every thrust made your toes curl, and made you want to cry out as complete and utter pleasure washed over you.
You could feel yourself approaching an orgasm, and Wonwoo seemed to notice too. He opened his mouth- surely to comment on it when suddenly his eyebrows furrowed. He began to quicken his pace fucking you- he was getting closer to an orgasm as well- but he kept glancing up.
“What?” You asked. “What’s wrong?” “It’s nothing...”
His eyes flickered upwards again.
“Wonwoo-” “I just... I could have sworn I saw something.”
You twisted your body around to see, but the movement just made Wonwoo’s’ cock slam right into the spot that made you moan even louder. Your eyes slammed shut and you wrapped your arms tightly around Wonwoo’s neck.
“Wooo-”
“Oh I know what I see now,” Wonwoo said, a hitch of horror in his voice as he spoke. You looked back up at him, eyes wide in fear.
“What? What do you see?”
“A ghost,” Wonwoo responded, his voice barely above a whisper. Then, without warning his hands jumped to your sides, making your whole body lurch. You screamed and as you did, you felt yourself beginning to cum.
Wonwoo felt it too as he pinned you down by your stomach and fucked you hard through your orgasm, unloading his cum into you with a loud moan of his own. Once he had finally collapsed on top of you, you grunted and shoved him over.
“You... You fucking sadist.” Wonwoo bit out a laugh.
“Come on,” he insisted. “It was fun wasn’t it?”
You didn’t tell him it was.
“We are never doing this again.” But it was kind of fun.
And you two did do it again.
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whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)
this is a great question!!
if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing
for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works
slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits
and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.
(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)
as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.
right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.
but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!
ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:
[SIERRA]
MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.
Chef: hey!
Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married
Sierra: …can we just turn it off please
[COURTNEY]
DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—
MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?
ZARINA: And kick ass!
DAD: Zarina!
Video cuts out.
Alejandro: courtney you good?
Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter
Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]
[ALEJANDRO]
MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.
DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.
JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]
Alejandro: callate!
MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.
DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.
[NOAH]
MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!
ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!
RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]
MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?
Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—
ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!
LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.
BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding
ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!
JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.
Noah: [frozen, ashamed]
Sierra: well that was a mess
Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]
Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…
Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv
Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane
Chef: oh fuck
Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom
Everyone: …
Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems
Everyone: yeah ok sounds good
***
Courtney: so that sucked
Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok
Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like
Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx
***
Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you
Noah: yep
Alejandro: why?
Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified
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lissalizzie · 3 years
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Okay so a couple of days ago I made a post about how I couldn't write fanfics about Chishiya because I couldn't imagine him as a guy who would be in a romance without sacrificing his girlfriend for a card or visas, and some very cool person suggested me to write an angst...AND I DID ahahahaha.
Ookay, somethings you should know now: I'm Brazilian and I speak Portuguese, I learned English by myself and this is the first time I try writing anything in English so IM SORRY IF I MADE ANY MISTAKE
Second thing would be
THIS IS ANGST SO IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT OR IF IT MAKES YOU FEEL BAD OR UNCOMFORTABLE PLEASE DON'T READ IT
It also contains death, psychological manipulation and violence
Please dont romanticize it too, it's not a romance story, it's just the conditions I imagined for Chishiya to be involved with someone
Chishiya x Reader
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You were hurt... So hurt you couldn't even begin to explain that feeling.
It was true You were somehow grateful because you were alive at least... Your friends couldn't say the same, and neither all those people you saw dying every fucking game.  But you just couldn't... Not to think about how pointless was being alive and alone at that place... Alive, alone and fucking in love with a person who had an Ice cube in a shape of a card in the place of his heart.
You knew from day 1 when you met Chishiya and Kuina at the Beach, when that boy with the mysterious look came to you for the first time for "a talk" that nothing good could come from that. Nothing, except, maybe, for Kuina's friendship... She, who was the first person who notices the mess you was doing and tried to stop you... As the great blind stubborn you were, You just didn't listen at the time... You was at a fucking game world, playing for your life almost everyday, dealing with deaths and losing people... Missing the ones you loved the most, those ones you didn't even know if were or weren't alive... You could deal with a stuck up  boy, because that's everything you thought he was... Your mistake... Well, You've recently discovered You're pretty damn good in making mistakes here.
Chishiya discovered yout feelings because at some point you couldn't manage to fight for your life and hide it... He noticed and started to be there for you after every game, specially the harder ones. He didnt talk anything, he just was there... He didnt touch you either, but he got to spend more and more time looking at you while you both were on bed... Those eyes, just as cold as him.
You didnt touch him, but you imagined he would be just as cold as that look... But you also believed he would be that deep... Like oceans. Chishiya was a grey ocean that you wanted so much, and every day more, to know...
You was so fragile, so fragile when he touched your skin for the first time, twice... The first time with his hands that wasn't cold at all which just made you want him nearer... The second time with the lips that came from your face to your mouth.
The boy must've planned that for weeks, you could see that now, in fact, now you understand that must be the reason why he looked so much at you. You was that school subject Chishiya probably didnt have any interest on but really had to study to pass the test... So he did... And you did...
And for the first time since you fell into that hell you felt alive, you felt like someone, just one person was there, and that Chishiya cared... And that  he would do for you just as much that you would do for him.
You were so blind and in love... He started saying things about plans and you were so happy cause you thought that meant he trusted you...  The first time he mentioned you on a plan you couldn't stop smiling, you were finally a part of someone's life there, it was like having a purpose again... And also being with him felt so much like action and... Not knowing about the next second because he was so... cloudy.
God, if only you could talk to yourself in the past, if only you have stopped for a second and gave that situation a better look... You felt so dumb now...
Well when he asked you to go to that place at night you... Just went, because you trusted him with your life by now. You knew somewhere deep in your heart that you shouldn't... Not just him but anyone... But it was a need, you were alone for a long time and then you found him... And then he started acting that way with you... He caught you out of guard...
It was silent, you didnt understand why you should be there, but the fact is that you were so afraid. Chishiya only said to be there and walk... It wasnt that much, but just as fast as you got there, you felt something on your back and then everything was dark.
When you woke up, you were in a room and Niragi, just with a couple of other important people -you just knew they were important because they were with the Hatter, the only one you could recognize besides Niragi because of the colors of his clothes.- You barely could see, actually, your eyes were still dealing with the lights.
- So that's the little bitch, huh? - You could listen to Hatter's voice. He came near of you and showed you a couple of cards. - Trying to steal from me ? You bastard really thought you could steal from me and just run away ?
You just didnt understand, you didnt had any card with you. You knew what happened to traitors and you always gave your cards to the beach just as you was told.
-B-But... I give my cards to you, I know I do. I'm not dumb
- Oh honey, dont play the stupid card. We found the cards with you, you were running away... You have many here... You haven't been to all this games lately, have you ? Have you been stealing from someone else, darling? - Hatter seemed to be genuinely angry and you were so afraid to say anything.
-I...
- Yes... - And you heard that familiar voice... That was Chishiya but you were hoping he would only come to help you... - My cards have been disappearing as I told you. I connected that it happened after every game I played with her after we became close... That's when I came to talk to you... - That was so much information you couldn't even handle. Chishiya betrayed you, lied about you and used you as his little toy just so he could... Distract people while he was doing whatever he was really planning and wasn't telling you... It was so clear... Oh God you felt so dumb and now it was like all your fights for being alive in that place had no value at all... Because you let yourself get caught by that stupid feeling...
Chishiya looked at you with the same cold eyes as always, no guilt... You wasn't expecting any, not after that.
- Well.. Death for the traitors, that's what you've been told - Hatter was just ready to give the orders to Niragi and you didnt really think you deserved to die by the hands of such a disgusting person
At that point you could only cry cause you knew it wasn't worth it to try arguing... Chishiya was too damn smart and there would be no evidence of mistakes if you knew him...
- She was stealing from me, right ? So I think I have the right to end this with my own hands? - Everyone got so surprised because Chishiya wasnt exactly the kind of guy who got involved with the dirty part of the job.
- Are you sure about this ? - Hatter never really doubted about Chishiya because he knew how much about himself he didnt show people... So Yes, killing someone because of a couple of cards didn't surprise him at all, maybe because he would do the same. - Whatever... Just be done with it by the morning... And dont even think about playing any kind of game Chishiya... You could be the next one.
Chishiya wasnt even listening. Niragi seemed literally so frustrated but, at some point, all people left.
Chishiya caught the gun that was above the table and came near you. You were crying silently but so hard... - What do you want? You wanna torture me now? Seeing me playing the stupid in love all this time wasnt enough for you? You want to literally kill me? How did you do that? - You were screaming, at that point you didnt care if someone would hear.
- You don't understand, right? - And then he showed a couple of cards, this time, one of each... Oh god... He literally used you to get Hatters's cards. - I'm sorry you made the wrong choices... But I needed to to this... I want to get out of here just as much as you...  About the plan... You know I have access to the cards after the games... It's not that hard to steal the repeated ones, they don't pay that much attention on them... And also, just after I did it, I came to talk to Hatter about my card disappearing so the he wouldn't miss anything... It wasnt that har actually, it was just a distraction... But you know so much about me and my plans so I couldn't let you alone with Niragi or any of those people cause they're so dumb they might believe you and that's would be a problem for me... So
- You bastard, What do you think you are? God? You think you can just come and sacrifice people? - You wanted to beat him so hard it almost gave you the strength to break that stupid string around you. He just smiled that way you used to love but now make you nauseous.
- If I were god... I wouldn't allow people as easy to manipulate as you to live with the others, darling... Dont blame me for trusting the person everyone told you that shouldn't be trusted... Now... Let's get this done. - He pointed the gun at your forehead and you screamed as you closed your eyes.
- Please... Please Chishiya. I didnt mean anything for you at all?
- There's no meaning when there's no feeling, y/n... You're not in high school, you're playing for your life, and so am I... And you lost. I'm so sorry for you. - For the first time he seemed to be nervous but you couldn't see much anyway... He pulled the trigger... And then it was over.
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doomslayer66 · 2 years
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Hello! I’ve been questioning my gender for a few months now (I’m AFAB) and I don’t really know if I’m trans or not. I’m fine with being referred to with she/her pronouns and I’m ok with being a woman. He/him pronouns don’t feel that much different than she/her pronouns for me and I also feel bad when people group me in with girls and say things like “looks like it’s all girls here tonight” and call me a woman. When I wear dresses and more feminine revealing things I feel like crying and like I’m not myself. That feeling goes along with full faces of makeup too (a little is fine).
When I watch transmasc tiktoks I feel really happy and excited. I would love to not have periods and have male genitals, also if it were up to me I would have chosen to be AMAB. I lean toward dressing masc/androgynous but I’m not sure how I feel about short hair. I wouldn’t mind having more facial and body hair too. As a kid I always hung out with the boys and I love feeling like one of the boys, it hurts whenever someone points out that painful divide between me and the guys and that I’m a girl so Im different from them and that I won’t ever be fully included due to my gender. As far as physical things go, I get happy when I wear boxers and pack and bind. I have fairly small boobs but I still don’t like it when I see them, but that could just be me being cis and said about my small chest. I think that having girl parts is weird and I’d rather have male genitals because then I wouldn’t have a period, I could pee standing up, and I could reproduce with male organs.
At school and in public, I will look at guys and think ‘I wish I looked like you’, there aren’t any other feelings like attraction or wanting to be their friend, its mostly just envy. Also since the start of puberty I haven’t been able to look at myself naked in the mirror or just looking at myself in general. Recently I’ve noticed how curvy I am due to my hips and it makes me feel bad. It gets complicated when I try to imagine myself in a relationship or me later in life. I can imagine myself as a woman in a lesbian relationship and in a straight relationship, but I can also imagine myself as a guy in a straight relationship. I can’t tell if my ‘dysphoria’ is just me hating myself or of it really is gender related. All I know is that it’s there almost always, there aren’t ever any days where I look at my chest and don’t wish that I couldn’t see it.
Sorry, I know that my thoughts are all over the place in this post, I’m just really unsure of myself right now. Thank you in advance for the help :)
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jameskingofsnakes · 3 years
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(THIS WAS A SHIT STORY I MADE AND POSTED ON WATTPAD, YES I KNOW ITS TERRIBLE IM SORRY IN ADVANCE FOR THOSE WHO ARE READING THIS)
(a/n there are misspellings and shit but I don't care)
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Peter, bucky, and Steve were best of friends since kids, they were the best of friends anyone had ever seen. And although the two would never admit it, Bucky and Peter thought of each other as more than friends, they had feelings for each other but they were both scared of what the other would think. After all, that type of love wasn't allowed. Everyone said that being gay was a sin, but they didn't think so, the two just wanted to love each other. And it went on like this for years, both males hiding their feeling for the other. The best part was that most people could tell they were in love, Sadly the two never got to tell each other how they felt before the 'Accident, Peter and the rest of his family died, he had only recently turned 19 went it happened. Bucky was devastated, not only did he lose his best friend, but he also lost his love. But something told him that wasn't the end, he didn't know why- but he believed it.
***
It's currently 4:57 am, the team was called down for an emergency intruder alert.
They expected some kind of big threat but instead, it was a 'teenaged' boy, maybe 17 in black and red spandex, but that wasn't even the strangest part. they realized the suit that was hugging his body had the hydra symbol printed across his back and chest, and all hell broke loose. Four of them were yelling and getting into their battle stance, while Natasha stood trying to get answers from The super-soldier who went by Captain America. And in all honesty, the guy was scared, of course, he could easily take on all of these people, but doing that would only let his monsters win.
He came here for help but instead, everyone was freaking out. It was starting to aggravate him, the only person here that he knew was The star-spangled man, and Steve hadn't said a word to the boy. No one had, it's just been yelling. The only one to really observe the boy had been a redhead suited in black.
"Guys-"
They kept going and ignored the woman. So the red-headed woman yelled and stomped her foot.
"Would you please shut the hell up!?" She growled.
"if you guys would stop and pay attention, you'd notice that the kid hasn't even engaged in combat yet." She shook her head, visibly disappointed in the others. "You haven't even given him a chance to talk, and he looks Young, probably terrified."
The woman gave him a small glance before glaring back at the others.
The four put that heads down and nodded, the man with the arrows looked like he wanted to say something but one glance from the angry hero shut him up.
The room got quiet. They were unsure what to say, they didn't want to trigger the boy (or the black widow)
Finally, Steve put his hand out and waited for the boy to take it.
"Sorry for the commotion, Steve Rogers. And you are?"
The boy shook the man's hand as quickly as possible. He made sure not to look the man in the eyes so he wouldn't get punished. As soon as he shook it he walked further from the man.
"паук."
They looked at the boy in confusion, what kind of name was that-
Natasha moved closer to the boy, she tried to put a hand on his shoulder but he quickly shut down.
He dropped to the ground and gave a knee.
"извините, мэм, накажите меня, как хотите." He spoke frantically.
She looked at him, why on earth would he- never mind, he's been in hydra's hands for God knows how long.
"Нет, вставай, паук." Natasha made sure to speak slowly. She could see the potential this guy had, fighting him is not something they can do without having to call damage control after. He was strong, she could tell.
паук scurried to his feet and apologized. The rest of the team stood behind Black Widow as if they were hiding from a wild animal, and Natasha was controlling the beast. Bruce wasn't scared as much as the others, normally he would be but the big guy wasn't out. Maybe the Hulk doesn't see the intruder as a threat. If big green was okay with him shouldn't they?
The only thing visible on паук's face was his Bambi eyes that we're glued to Steve. паук slowly walked over to the Captain, he took his mask that covered his lower face and ripped it off. Steve paled and he felt tears prick his eyes. It was impossible, but that's what he thought about bucky yet his best friend was still sleeping four floors below them. But everyone saw it, the house exploded, the were no survivors, hell they found AND confirmed his body. But the man who stood in front of him was none other than Peter Parker.
"P-peter?"
'Peter' looked more scared than Captain America, he had never heard the name Peter, yet when the words left caps mouth he felt something inside him click. He remembers this man. This man is Steve Rogers! Peter smiled, "Я тебя знаю!Я действительно!" Steve gave him a sad smile, no one knew what he was saying except for Natasha, but Peter didn't know that. He thought they were scared.
Natasha walked up to him yet again and did as she did before. This time she smiled, which is something she doesn't do often. When Natasha put her hand on his shoulder he didn't kneel he just looked at her with hope in his eyes, he wanted help. Natasha gestured to the others and then looked at Peter, "Ты знаешь английского паука?" He nodded.
"H-hello."
They waited for him to continue.
"I'm The "Dancing Spider", but the guards just call me Spider as you can tell I escaped hydra. I think something went wrong- first they were wiping my mind, next I had memories coming back and, " he motioned to Steve, "he was in them. I waited until I was given my next mission to run, that's the only time I'm allowed outside for... Reasons. But there were others from my what I seen. A family, and...and ag this guy- but... I only remember his eyes- and hair- but he um... He called me Doll!
He stopped and looked down, it was like he was too ashamed to continue. And maybe it was because he was. in the flashback, there were three people, him, Steve, and someone else. The other person had dark brown hair and steel blue eyes. He's was taller than both peter and Steve, but Steve was much, much smaller.
The 'teen' had stopped talking for a while so Steve started asking questions, "Pete- sorry, Spider? Do you remember how old you are?" Peter lifted his head up and slowly nodded. "Twenty-three." That's all he said, his mind was still on the mystery guy. Why? Why was he so damn important to him? It made him mad, how can he be so valuable to peter yet he has no idea who he is!? But then again, there's a lot of people peter can remember. But Steve was taken back- four years, peters had four years of his life stolen from him. But for those who knew him, it was much longer.
"Do you remember May and Ben?" Steve quietly questioned.
Then some things flooded peters head that was probably best forgotten, his aunt and uncle, their dog, then the explosion. The one that he started. But he didn't want to, of course, it was his first mission, hydra made sure to replay the horrid memory. Over and over.
"So... He's not a kid?" The gold and red armor asked.
Peter looked shocked, and who can blame him? The iron suit was talking, hydra might have had good tech but this was... Freaky. Peter put his hands up in fists ready to fight, everyone else got on guard ready to do the same."W-what the hell is that?" He stuttered.
The heroes calmed down after they have seen he was just startled. The glowing eyes that belonged to the iron suit stopped glowing and a man stepped out.
"Howard?" Peter questioned, then his eyes widened, he had unlocked a new memory.
While Peter was trying to piece together all of the things he could remember tony stood stiff, he hadn't heard that name in a while, and this guy knew his dad? God everything is confusing. He shook the thoughts away and looked at peter who had a puzzled look on.
"I'm actually his- his son."
Peter smiled a bit thinking about how much the two looked alike. "You just look so much like him! Did he build your..." He pointed to the Iron man suit, "that?" Tony shook his head and looked down, "No, um... Howa- my father- and Hydra- he's ah, he's dead..."
Peters face dropped and he felt another wave of guilt hit him."oh my God- did? Did I do it!?" He was on the verge of tears, why? Why was he a monster?
Tony walked over to peter and put a hand on his shoulder, peter backed away. "No! Please, I didn't want to I swear!" Tony looked at Steve for help, Steve had a look on his face that said he was thinking, his eyes widened. He walked out of the room and tony went back to peter.
"Hey, Hey kid look. You- you didn't do it okay?."
"..." Peter looked up.
"It's fine, you're okay," Tony explained. It wasn't the truth but what was he supposed to say 'oh don't sweat it! It was another hydra soldier!'
Peter took a step out of Tony's grasp and fell to his knees, "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come here. I'm just putting you all in danger!" He pulled his knees to his chest, why won't they just kill him already? That's what they do right? You break into a building and they don't attack you? That makes sense.
Nobody touched him, he just sat on the ground surrounded by people he doesn't know. It was quiet yet peter could still hear their heartbeats. The man with the glasses was calm, the redhead was calm as well, along with the man with the bow. The other two had strange heartbeats. The one with their glowing chest had a faint heartbeat but also a slight humming, the blonde with the hammer had a calm heartbeat but the rhythm wasn't a pattern, and it was loud.
Tony had walked away from the young adult because he had obviously made him uncountable again, this is why he leaves the comforting people thing to Bruce and Steve. None of them knew why Steve walks away, but they all wanted him to come back.
Peter felt the eyes on him so he wanted to make himself more comfortable before snapped at all the people who had nothing better to do than to stare at him, like seriously! He came here for help; they stare! The one person he knew ran off, and if Peter was him he'd run too! He sighed and stuck his arm in the air. The others looked at him with pure confusion, Peter rolled his eyes and shot a web up to the ceiling, his lip twitched as if he was smile, why? Well, the other watched in horror as he pulled himself up and positioned himself.
It had been a few minutes and Steve was still gone, Peter was still on his web trying to keep calm, and the other five were still staring at Peter. He'd be lying if he said it wasn't bothering him. "If you want to say something please say it, you're getting on my nerves with the pointless staring." He closed his eyes and allowed himself steady again.
"Do you really know Steve?" Asked Tony.
Peter flinched but kept his cool, "y-yes? Well I think, I remember him from some point in my life. We were friends I know that at the least but I also know there was someone else..."
Natasha was the second one to speak to him. He didn't mind though, Peter took a liking to her.
"Can you describe the other person?"
The spider let himself turn towards her. He let out a sigh. "I can but... Something tells me I won't see him again, by the looks of things I'm not in the '40s anymore, he's probably long gone, a family perhaps remember to him perhaps." He gave her a faint smile trying to hide the fact that he was disappointed in himself. Nat gave him a look that told him to go on.
"Well, he had dark brown hair and hair, and the most amazing blue eyes you've ever seen, I was close to him I know it but I just can't remember h-his name."
Peter let a single tear roll down his face, he smiled again then left his hands-free, so now he just relaxed as his body moved upside down.
He pointed to Bruce, "your doctor banner right?" Bruce sighed. "Yes, unfortunately, you probably have files on the other guy huh?" Said Bruce. Peter looked confused.
"Actually sir, the only person I know is Steven, however, I've read your books. Me being one of their best creations means I got 'special' treatment, so I was about a year ago I was given some books."
Bruce only nodded as a response. Everyone stood quietly as they watched Peter move gracefully, he switched back the position he was into before. This time he looked at the man with the arrows. "You want to know why I'm doing up here, right?" "How did you- never mind." Peter let out a breath and closed his eyes, "this is sort how I got my name, The Dancing Spider, that and when I fight 'it looks like a dance'. But I also do this as a way to calm down, and you people obviously don't know that staring makes people uncomfortable- not to mention it's rude" the five quickly tried to find something else to look at, "it's fine just a bit irritating, be staring too, I mean some dancing assassin shows up randomly, " he let himself fall. He walked towards the window and looked for the latch that would open it. "I've caused enough trouble, if I umm, if I leave now they won't go after me. Guards don't check cells until-" The elevator doors dinged as they shut again and two men walked up to the group.
"7:30, they don't make rounds on the A floors until 7:30." The other man said. Peter spun around to see Steve inspecting the web that hung from the floor, beside him was a man with dark brown hair that was just above his shoulders. Peter's dark brown eyes locked with the steel Blue ones. It was him- the man he had seen! The one who was so important to him! It was James.
The memories flooded back, from when they were kids, their days in high school, how he Peter had the biggest crush, god, peter liked him- no, he loved him.
Peter let the tears fall, he didn't care if he got punished for crying he had finally found his love! He smiled wide and started walking to the man.
"J-James?"
Buck nodded and walked towards Peter as well, they met halfway in the center of the room, bucky didn't care if the others saw that he was crying, he had been dreaming of the day that he'd see Peter again, of course, this isn't how he would have wanted it to go but it didn't matter. "Hey, Pete-" he didn't get a chance to finish his sentence before the smaller male jumped on him, arms wrapped tight around his neck. Bucky didn't want to let go. He finally got his best friend back, he had his love back.
They didn't care if the other we're watching, they'd rather them starting than be apart again. "I'm sorry- I am so so sorry James." Peter cried into the taller man's neck. The soldier pulled away so he could see his face, Peter looked up at him with tears rushing down his face. "For what, You did nothing wrong?"
"I never got to tell you that I loved you." Bucky's face softened, 'Peter always was the first to apologize for nothing' he thought. He pulled Peter in for another hug, his chin laid on the smaller's head. "Then do it now." Said bucky. Then he loosened his grip on peter. The spider looked up at him, visible shock displayed itself on his face.
"W-what?"
"I said do it."
Peter was shocked, as much as he hated it he thought this type of thing wrong, everyone said it wasn't right, no matter how much he wanted it to be right they told him it was bad. But Peter didn't care he wasn't gonna let them stop his feelings. He cupped buck's face with his hands, slowly pulling the other in, Peter kissed him. And of course, Bucky kissed him back, it was the most gentle thing either of them had felt in years.
The rest of the room (minus Steve) had no idea why they two were crying, or why Steve had brought Barnes he anyway. But they started to understand once they watched the two broken males interacted with each other, then they understood. Yes, they were broken- but they knew they were broken together.
The couple broke apart with a smile on their faces. Peter looked at Bucky, tears still streaming from his doe eyes, he smiled as he looked his love in the. eyes.
"James Buchanan Barnes, I love you. And I don't care what anyone else says- or thinks."
Bucky smiled down at Peter.
"Peter Benjamin Parker, I love you, and I have dreamed every night that I would see you again."
The pair smiled knowing that they finally were together again. But Peter let the worries set in as he thought about what hydra would do if they found him? He doesn't want to lose James again, what if they take James? Bucky felt his lover tense up so he hugged him tighter. "James?" "Yeah, Petey?" Peter let out a deep breath, "what if hydra comes back? I don't wanna loses you again, I don't think I could go through that again." Bucky kissed the top of peters head, knowing what it's like to fear hydra. "They haven't found me yet." "What?!" Peter asked. Bucky smiled sadly. He had been on the same floor as the dancing spider- yet he never would have thought he could be his love. "You know the other to soldiers on the A floor?" Peter shook his head at buck's question. "It used to be me, and somebody else... But they're dead, have been fo- how did you know what floor I was on?" He quickly asked, pulling away to look at the blue eyes that stared down at him. Bucky took off his glove and rolled up his sleeve. Peter's eyes widened at the sight of a shining metal arm, he brought his hand up to touch the cold metal.
"You're the Winter Soldier?"
Bucky nodded, his head nodded towards the web behind them.
"And... you're the Dancing spider?"
"Y-yea, sadly."
Bucky looked at him again, the look on Peter's face had no fear, he would have thought that the young man would regret saying 'I love you' but instead Peter and bucky had the same excepting look on their faces. Peter took a shaky breath and shut his eyes, "how?" Bucky looked at him, puzzled. The spider opened his eyes. Tears flowed from his eyes as they have been throughout the morning. "How did you do it? Hell, you're still doing it now! how can you stand here and stay strong knowing that if they find me they might find you too? How did withstand all of the fear and hide from them?"
Bucky pulled him closer, a sad but gentle smile on his face. He kissed peter softly on the lips before he looked his love in the eyes, "because I knew, somewhere my love was alone, and I wasn't going to give up until we were together, " he placed his flesh hand on peters face and wiped away from the tears with his thumb.
"I love you."
(EW- IM SO SORRY)
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